Pearl - The Insanity of an ＂Open＂ Marriage

00:00:00.000 don't want to put it like because it shows she has no respect for him doesn't really care if she

00:00:04.240 loses him i don't think there is always value and honesty i don't think that's always like a good

00:00:10.080 thing what up guys welcome to my reaction series today we are reacting to women talking about rules

00:00:17.280 in an open marriage it's kind of crazy how quickly this window has moved in the last decade when i

00:00:25.760 was in high school i didn't know a single person that did the swinging and the open marriage thing

00:00:30.560 and now it i don't know if it's because i i got older and i found out about it or it's been way

00:00:35.600 more prevalent but i've i've heard people in real life that i know talk about it um like they know

00:00:40.720 people that do it or they met at like i know one couple that met at a swinging club i'm like what

00:00:45.600 husband and i have had an open marriage for about a year and a half by request these are our rules

00:00:49.680 and boundaries and this is part three we also have a rule with each other that we don't come

00:00:53.440 home with marks um i bruise easily and i'm very clumsy um so covered in them anyway but um out of

00:01:00.080 respect um yeah we don't come home with okay um i guess that's a reasonable no marks i mean look

00:01:06.960 if they're two consenting adults i'm not here to babysit what two consenting adults are doing i

00:01:12.720 just i don't have the time for this but god i need to suit her husband looks like he's got to be so

00:01:19.360 cocked from our other partners for us there is nothing secret about our relationships with the

00:01:24.720 other people and the other people we're dating we aren't the kind of people who really enjoy

00:01:29.040 sharing or hearing details with each other well that's not true i think i enjoy sharing but

00:01:33.440 neither of us enjoy hearing them about each other but so if anything happens where something new

00:01:37.920 happens or it's something the kind of story i would tell a friend i've heard that as somebody

00:01:42.640 else's guideline for their open relationship before um we tell each other once i held off

00:01:48.240 on telling him something because i was like well i knew you wouldn't love hearing this and i thought

00:01:51.840 it might make you upset and he was like well that's kind of exactly why i need to hear it

00:01:56.320 because i want to know fully what i'm agreeing to as far as opening up our relationship

00:02:01.840 okay so now the husband wants to know everything he's agreeing to i think some men just have the

00:02:07.120 cuck gene i mean the only way they could have reproduced is by getting cucked so if you think

00:02:11.440 it's something that there's two types of cut like okay i think destiny is like the king of cuck like

00:02:17.600 he's the least cucked cucked person because i think he cheated on melania more than she cheated

00:02:23.280 on him and therefore he's kind of the cucker whereas um a lot of these guys i mean if they

00:02:30.800 can't get poonanny like i don't want to put it like if a girl has a husband and they open it up

00:02:36.400 and the husband's getting more 20 year old hot ass than she's getting dick down uh is he really

00:02:42.400 cucked do you know what i mean like they get this old brawn obviously like ones obviously none of

00:02:48.800 these are ideal but do you guys see the thought process but i just can't imagine the guy married

00:02:53.280 to her looks that good and is getting really good i don't know it'll upset me it'll probably upset

00:02:58.960 me but i do want to know we try not to message or text in front of each other excessively like

00:03:04.160 you can answer a message or say one thing but um if we notice that each other is distracted and

00:03:10.240 you're messaging somebody else you're dating it feels kind of i mean this is just like a branch

00:03:14.720 swing you know i've been baiting on our time with each other so we try not to do that we don't have

00:03:20.160 any rules about the stuff you can do physically with other people um aside from the no marks and

00:03:24.720 always wearing uh protection it really feels good to me to govern what we do with our own bodies

00:03:30.000 for safety for me on dates i share the full name and address of where we're going to um with my

00:03:35.440 husband whenever i go to any guy's house for the first time i always also keep my google location

00:03:40.880 on invisible to my husband and vice versa if either of us has a friend over here it's your

00:03:45.280 job to clean up and stuff obviously like drinks and whatever but also if the one of us who isn't

00:03:50.000 home needs to come home you have the priority to interrupt and get here when you need to get here

00:03:55.440 for whatever reason i was very shy about that at first but he and the woman he was seeing was like

00:04:00.000 it's your house that's it for our rules tell me yours okay well at least he had a girl he was

00:04:06.800 seeing okay let's see non-monogamy married i really want to see what the husband looks like

00:04:14.080 oh no i got laid off again i brought um dating a non all right she does stand up

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00:05:50.920 with confidence not confusion use code pearl for a hundred dollars off if you have any poly friends

00:05:58.920 you know that as a group we're pretty dorky it's a pretty nerdy community dating a poly person is

00:06:06.040 kind of like making a deal with the devil where you can have incredible sex with somebody who

00:06:11.960 makes it their hobby to be good at it but a row of pokemon plushies will be watching

00:06:22.200 you can meet a guy who knows exactly how your body works right off the bat somehow he will meow at you

00:06:29.240 if you have any poly friends uh you know that i mean she's kind of funny is there a

00:06:47.720 okay i can't see the guy meaning he's probably oh she came out to her family and put that online

00:06:53.960 oh god oh god she's put everything up here oh my god okay let's let's see the next one

00:07:01.880 um i haven't seen a really hot poly girl yet i mean this is cute yesterday i had a comment in

00:07:08.920 the response to my video and about how my polyamorous marriage works now if you don't

00:07:15.000 know me i'm courtney i'm a polyamorous mom of three married to a monogamous man and if you're

00:07:20.120 interested in following my journey i encourage you to so the question that i got asked was do

00:07:25.480 you have any rules now this is something that has evolved over time since we've had the marriage

00:07:31.560 open for about two and a half years and right now um and for the foreseeable future we have three

00:07:37.960 rules uh the first one is and let me start by saying none of these rules were in like you have

00:07:45.960 to do this these were after conversations that my husband and i had together about what feels good

00:07:51.800 what's considerate and you know serves the greater purpose of what i'm looking for as a polyamorous

00:07:57.800 woman so the first rule is video chat before first date and this is a huge safety thing for me

00:08:05.560 surprisingly i have actually had guys like rescind them asking me out on a date when i said hey

00:08:11.640 i'd really like to do a video call before we meet and they're like absolutely not and so then i say

00:08:17.640 yeah because if the reason they do that is because it's just a sign that she doesn't

00:08:22.200 like you that much if you really like a guy you're like let's meet immediately

00:08:27.800 okay then we won't be meeting um so that's rule number one rule number two is no sex on the first

00:08:34.280 date this was something that again came from me because i am not looking for a casual sexual

00:08:40.840 relationship i'm looking for a romantic long-term partner i found that if sex is on the table for

00:08:47.400 the first date it tends to um change the vibe of really what i'm looking for so that's rule number

00:08:54.440 two and rule number three is use protection be smart and be safe that's it i'm allowed to fall

00:09:01.080 in love i'm allowed to travel i've heard that most people that swinging swing catch herpes at some

00:09:05.880 point i mean i guess if you're that old who cares i know that's not the best attitude to have but

00:09:16.120 like if you catch something at 50 do you i mean doesn't do you know what i mean it's like you're

00:09:22.760 almost like okay you gotta live with it for like 20 years and with my other partner when i have one

00:09:29.320 meet his family buy him gifts stay at his house um there's no like limits on okay let's see how

00:09:37.500 cocked is this guy let's see oh my god the husband stayed monogamous oh so i recruited my monogamous

00:09:45.280 husband to help answer this question he looks exactly like you would think he would look how

00:09:49.660 slow do you go yes thank you for uh letting me join um so i would say for us and what worked

00:09:57.640 well for us and we're just one example was to go at the pace of the slowest person this guy so

00:10:04.680 we never had questions or concerns uh courtney would address them and then it's so crazy because

00:10:10.380 god she's just humiliating him oh he's so he she also gave me lots of resources to find out more

00:10:20.400 information about non-monogamy and polyamory and sort of to help me understand as well as books

00:10:25.960 and podcasts and other things to read so that was really helpful for me but i would say ultimately

00:10:30.520 you likely need to go at about this lower person's pace like how long is that like a year before they

00:10:35.640 can go on a date yeah i mean at some point you're gonna have to decide to go on a date for us it was

00:10:39.640 about six months and that worked good for us so that's one way of doing it but try to go at the

00:10:44.920 pace yeah like maybe not do an overnight first you know like coffee go yeah go on a coffee date

00:10:50.840 and see how that goes so cheering you on i think cheating would be more respectful than this

00:10:57.960 i don't know to put it like because it shows she has no respect for him

00:11:01.400 he doesn't really care if she loses him i don't think there is always like um

00:11:08.200 value and honesty i don't think that's always like a good thing that we should be like thankful for

00:11:16.200 i mean because it's not like the men are honest with us when we start getting old and we're

00:11:20.040 they're like yeah your your punani's kind of you know used now and i guess i'll marry you

00:11:27.400 like if men's um wedding vows were honest it would say i got dragged down the aisle

00:11:34.440 um you're the hottest girl i could get and you're not even that hot so this is kind of a

00:11:41.480 disappointment but i guess i'll do it fine it's just you made it the easiest so i'll take it

00:11:48.120 it back with a part two of this is the cutest polyamorous girl let's see

00:11:54.000 just don't want to be milf um bi feminine here for a good time oh no

00:11:59.820 crazy okay let's let's see what she has to say but i just

00:12:18.120 these guys just kind of look exactly how i think they would look and i'm back with a part two of

00:12:24.200 how we told our children that we have an open marriage if you want part one make sure hold

00:12:29.640 your kids you skedaddle your little booty to part one and watch it but basically if you're new here

00:12:35.240 my husband and i have an open marriage we both date other people i am also bisexual and i've

00:12:40.840 had a girlfriend for about a year now and we also have a six and almost nine year old and we just

00:12:46.440 told them as well about our little dynamic so like i said in part one we wanted to make this

00:12:51.240 conversation very natural very nonchalant not a big deal and not weird at all the weirder you

00:12:56.680 make things the weirder kids make things kids are very intuitive so anywho we're at the kitchen

00:13:01.720 table and they're eating their hot dogs and their strawberries i'm a nervous wreck about to put my

00:13:05.880 pants my husband starts us off so he starts off by like saying you know how we talk about all the

00:13:10.840 time how families can look different right and then we go into you know how mommy has jackie

00:13:16.920 this friend jackie who's you know been hanging around for quite some time the thing is who are

00:13:21.320 these people that are coming in and out of their kids life it's just not at least a men cheat they

00:13:26.200 do it respectfully they'll do it in a different city in a different country um they at least are

00:13:33.160 respectfully cheating but women it's like we find a way to do everything worse like this is the most

00:13:39.800 disrespectful thing imagine we all know it would be if a man really hides his cheating he actually

00:13:46.680 is showing some care for the woman but if a woman like she's kind of disrupting her kid's life for

00:13:55.000 her selfish desires like i i honestly think that cheating would be better i think cheating in

00:14:02.120 another city would be better than what you're putting these people through now and they're

00:14:06.040 just like yeah yeah okay okay then i told them you know jackie is mommy's girlfriend my youngest

00:14:11.640 just all of a sudden goes girlfriend girlfriend girlfriend and my oldest just keeps continuing

00:14:17.400 to eat this hot dog so me thinking i need to explain it more i'm like okay guys you know like

00:14:21.800 i have the same feelings for you know jackie as i do for daddy i have romantic feelings so she's

00:14:26.920 not just a friend you know jackie is mommy's girlfriend and you know aj is sitting right next

00:14:31.880 to me reiterating everything i'm saying and they're just like okay we get it okay of course

00:14:38.020 we're both like guys do you have any questions like this is a safe space just so you know like

00:14:42.300 mommy and daddy are great nothing's gonna happen with us nothing's gonna change if anything you

00:14:47.680 just have this bonus person now who is part of our family and who you're gonna make memories with

00:14:52.900 and who's gonna love you and care for you so we're like okay guys like any questions like let us know

00:14:57.960 do you understand and finally our oldest is like i have a question and i'm like oh no so he goes

00:15:06.360 how did you get these strawberries so juicy mom and the thing is kids a lot of times when i hate

00:15:14.440 it when mothers say oh my kids accept it i mean they don't know anything different right when

00:15:18.920 you're a child you know it's kind of like there were some nannies i hated and you know my mom

00:15:26.680 would probably tell people oh and some of them were great it's not all but there's a few that

00:15:31.480 i just did not get along with and i could see my mom saying oh but they're okay they're fine with

00:15:37.160 the nannies but like when you're a kid you don't know there's another choice and you're afraid of

00:15:44.040 your mother to some extent or maybe your father too depending on the kind of dad but like and you

00:15:50.280 don't i don't know like it's weird because things make sense when you get older yeah

00:15:58.600 so obviously it went really smoothly um we we really truly believe that it went so smoothly

00:16:05.400 and they were so just like unfazed by it because of how we prepped them for this conversation and

00:16:11.640 how we've basically been prepping them like their entire life for conversations like these yeah these

00:16:16.680 this guy looks exactly like i think he would look you know we've read them books we've talked about

00:16:21.000 how relationships can look like how different families can look and we really think that that

00:16:26.680 has set a really great great foundation for them to be able to be open-minded and to be able to

00:16:31.240 think for themselves and as always we're always open to healthy conversation around this topic

00:16:37.560 yeah um i think cheating would be more respectful than this

00:16:43.320 cheating would be more respectful bring back cheating it's better than this bullshit

00:16:50.580 it's better than this open cucking

00:16:53.600 cheating at least shows some regard for the other person's feelings anyways guys let me know you

00:17:00.100 think of the comments like the video subscribe to the channel and i'll bring it and bring that

00:17:03.760 notification bell i'll see you next time

Pearl - December 26, 2025

The Insanity of an ＂Open＂ Marriage

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