REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 115. The What, Why And How Of Self-Awareness

00:00:00.000 what's up guys it's andy priscilla and this is the show for the realists say goodbye to the lies 0.98

00:00:21.280 the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys um today

00:00:27.900 i've got a short episode informative episode uh that you're going to want to hear because i think

00:00:33.020 it's going to provide a lot of benefit to you um before i get into it i want to remind you that

00:00:39.480 we do not uh run ads for this show i don't run ads on the show i try to provide as much value for you

00:00:47.120 guys as i can without annoying the shit out of everybody um and in return we do ask something 0.87

00:00:53.220 we ask that you know you share the show share the podcast um you know if the conversation comes up

00:00:59.560 give us a little plug and you know pay the fee that's what we call so everything here is on

00:01:04.260 word of mouth which is how i like to do things i like to i like to provide value and then get in

00:01:08.420 return um but i like to remind you guys to do that for me as well so i really appreciate that you know

00:01:14.560 we've been one of the top uh podcasts in the world since 2016 all because of the fact that you guys pay

00:01:23.140 a fee so uh thank you for doing that and thank you for for you know running on the honor system you

00:01:28.660 know today not not everybody's willing to do that so i really really appreciate it now today we're

00:01:34.640 going to talk about self-awareness all right and the reason self-awareness is important uh well first

00:01:40.460 off before i get into how why it's important it's it's something that confuses people you know i i see a

00:01:46.200 lot of people out there talking about self-awareness with with literally zero self-awareness um i think a lot

00:01:52.020 of people think it's something that it isn't i think a lot of people are confused about what it might

00:01:56.040 be and today i want to i want to kind of give you an intro to how to become self-aware and how to

00:02:02.620 you know understand what this concept really is and it's not going to take me long to explain it

00:02:08.720 now this isn't going to be an in-depth uh you know course on self-awareness this is a

00:02:13.960 fucking five or ten minute deal all right it's really simple so what is uh self-awareness well 0.77

00:02:19.540 self-awareness guys is a critical part of taking control of your life and achieving all of your 0.98

00:02:25.560 goals no matter what aspect they happen to be in okay you have to understand where you are who you

00:02:31.960 are and what you are to ever get where you want to go that's the first step in the process being

00:02:38.200 self-aware also allows you to understand what you're good at and what you need to improve on

00:02:43.600 all right and here's the most important thing as it relates to you guys you guys are out there trying

00:02:49.200 to be better you're trying to build businesses you're trying to get better at what it is you do

00:02:53.520 to do so you're going to have to become a great leader now you cannot ever be a great leader if you're

00:03:02.040 not very self-aware okay you have to recognize what you're great at and you have to recognize what

00:03:10.380 other people are great at and you have to figure out how to make this all work in harmony like the

00:03:15.680 conductor of a big orchestra but the problem is is that most people don't even know what self-awareness

00:03:23.700 is or why it's important okay so how do we become more self-aware well it's very simple all right it's

00:03:32.140 the concept of questioning your actions or decisions as they're happening all right is eating this donut

00:03:39.300 going to help me with my weight loss goals okay being aware of what actions will allow you to get

00:03:45.820 on track to achieving your goals and which ones will actually hold you back is a very important

00:03:50.680 concept for you to not only understand but to practice because getting anywhere in life you first

00:03:57.940 have to know where you are and what you're capable of and what you're good at and what you're not good

00:04:01.240 at and so many people like to cover this with so many justifications you know oh I wasn't born

00:04:09.160 smart or I wasn't born gifted or everybody hates me or I can't control myself or this or that or this

00:04:16.040 you have to be aware that those are all excuses and they're just stories that you've told yourself

00:04:20.840 that don't allow you to make progress towards where you want to go and this is also why your confidence

00:04:27.260 is also probably low okay when you build your self-awareness you build your confidence what does that

00:04:34.960 mean well what it means is when you have high confidence you stop doubting yourself over time

00:04:41.320 but you know on the other side you don't overestimate yourself okay this is an important

00:04:47.040 concept for you to understand this is why this show is called real af because it's about telling

00:04:53.060 yourself the truth it's about reality it's not about what you think you might be it's not about what

00:04:58.920 your friends think you are it's not about what your parents think you are it's about what you

00:05:03.420 actually are okay so becoming self-awareness and building our confidence go hand in hand

00:05:09.240 and you have to understand to do that you have to be able to ask yourself as things are happening

00:05:15.500 is this serving me or is this not serving me is this moving closer to where I want to be or is this

00:05:21.560 moving me further away from where I want to be okay this is what it looks like in real life 0.99

00:05:27.280 as you're doing it I'm talking about as you're standing at the fucking order counter of McDonald's 0.99

00:05:34.960 and you're looking up at the thing and you're like shit I know I shouldn't be eating this then you 0.99

00:05:39.440 don't okay that's being self-aware and then following through on the actions that your self-awareness 0.98

00:05:46.060 prompts into your brain okay so let me ask you something else are you even aware of how much

00:05:53.100 confidence you have and don't have are you good at your craft are you bad at your craft are you

00:05:58.700 mediocre at your craft are you a beginner are you an expert where can you approve what can you do to

00:06:03.740 improve what are you doing to improve these are all questions that help you build self-awareness

00:06:09.260 and a simple trick to building your confidence and self-awareness is asking for feedback from your

00:06:14.420 peers okay this is something I do constantly I constantly ask my team and I and honestly I was just out in the

00:06:21.740 gym with about fucking 2,000 people here at HQ and everybody that came up to me and said hey man I 0.93

00:06:28.300 really love the podcast I asked them a few questions about what they liked I asked them a few questions

00:06:32.880 about what kind of content I could give them to improve their lives now most of them said oh I love

00:06:38.560 it just the way you do it but I'm looking for that real feedback you know in real life so that and it's

00:06:45.340 not gonna hurt my feelings I'm gonna say okay uh they didn't like that or they love this and I'm not

00:06:50.480 gonna put so much stock into the fact of the things they love where I overestimate that aspect I just

00:06:55.940 understand that that's their opinion okay and so what we're talking about here really is getting

00:07:01.800 feedback from your team and then making an objective decision about the reality of the scenario

00:07:07.300 are they telling the truth what's their perspective do they see me the way the world sees me or are they

00:07:13.480 just saying that because I pay them to say that um do they like me do they love me do they not want to 0.98

00:07:18.960 hurt my feelings okay and this shit can and will drive you insane but the truth of the matter is is if 0.99

00:07:25.440 you become the person who asks yourself the questions if you become the person who's analyzing yourself 0.99

00:07:31.900 you become able to coach yourself because you're in such an aware place all right this is why I tell you

00:07:41.500 guys uh that I'm going to do the live hard program every single year until I actually die all right

00:07:48.600 and if you want to know what the live hard program is it's episode number 80 you go listen to it I'll

00:07:52.560 explain it all 75 hard is the boot camp for that program but the the idea here guys is what happens

00:07:59.120 is the more you go through this process of self-evaluation the more not only do you learn

00:08:04.920 about yourself and where your strengths and where your weaknesses are you become more confident in where

00:08:09.560 your strengths and where your weaknesses are and when you become the top level of confidence

00:08:14.500 there's really nothing that can destroy you because you understand what you're great at you understand

00:08:19.460 what other people are great at and you understand that for you to solve these problems over here you're

00:08:24.740 going to need some of these people with better skills than you and it's not going to bother you

00:08:28.620 because you're confident in your skills it does so many things for you you know if you don't do it

00:08:34.100 I don't really care it's fucking free but I'm just telling you it helps you create awareness

00:08:38.980 and it actually helps you fix the problems that you lack that's really what the program is for 0.90

00:08:44.120 but in conclusion guys you know self-awareness is the most important critical trait that you can

00:08:52.800 develop okay you cannot improve you cannot win you cannot be great unless you are extremely self-aware

00:08:59.200 and how it's relevant to you is you won't be able to build a business because you won't be able to

00:09:03.660 manage people effectively and to build a business you have to learn how to manage people and you have to

00:09:08.680 learn how to sell guess where you need great self-awareness guys you need it and how to manage it

00:09:13.800 and you need it and how to sell okay this is something you should try to do so start monitoring

00:09:19.840 your actions in real time start asking yourself questions after you do something start breaking

00:09:27.340 it's kind of like breaking down game film right like how did this interaction go oh I said this and 0.99

00:09:33.000 they said this and I and then I said this and they said this and then they told me to get fucked 0.99

00:09:36.460 well fuck where did you fuck that up okay well I shouldn't have said it like this I should have said 0.99

00:09:41.380 in different tone I could have asked a better question and that's next time I won't get told that 0.99

00:09:45.700 this is what self-awareness looks like in real time guys it's basically developing your ability to

00:09:51.840 coach yourself and self-evaluate in real time and if you cannot do this you cannot win so take the time

00:09:59.400 to do whatever it is you have to do to make sure you're committing yourself to becoming more self-aware

00:10:05.760 be quiet pay attention break down your interactions break down your actions throughout the day did I

00:10:14.120 have a great day did I do what I should have done did I execute here did I execute with the proper

00:10:19.620 intent you know and all these different questions to make sure that you're passing your own standard

00:10:25.120 when it comes time to make sure that you're passing your own test and your own set of standards 0.99

00:10:30.460 so that you can be confident in the fact that you know what the fuck you're actually doing 0.92

00:10:35.360 all right so that's my show for today guys I want you guys to start thinking about self-awareness I 0.94

00:10:41.600 want you to start practicing becoming self-aware and I want you to start you know maybe noticing when

00:10:47.520 you're not very self-aware when are things not going the way that you want why do they not go the way

00:10:53.360 you want and I'm going to bet you that when you learn to break that down you're going to see that

00:10:58.280 in that moment you weren't paying attention you were wrapped up in something else you were thinking 0.98

00:11:03.440 about something else and you weren't present to the situation and that's why it got fucked up 0.97

00:11:08.560 okay so understanding how not only what self-awareness is but also how to be self-aware is going to be the 0.99

00:11:15.760 key to you getting where you want to get sleeping on the floor now my jewelry box froze fuck a bowl 1.00

00:11:21.800 fuck a stove counted millions in the cold bad bitch booted swole got up on bankroll can't fold 1.00

00:11:28.480 doesn't know headshot case closed 1.00

00:11:31.020 you

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - June 18, 2021

115. The What, Why And How Of Self-Awareness

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript