REAL AF with Andy Frisella - September 30, 2021


147. Two Tools Champions Use To Win


Episode Stats

Length

17 minutes

Words per Minute

189.90727

Word Count

3,338

Sentence Count

1

Misogynist Sentences

3

Hate Speech Sentences

26


Summary

In this episode of The Realists, I talk about how to deal with negativity and how to turn negativity into productive action. I also talk about why you need to learn how to handle negativity in order to become a better person.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 what's up guys it's andy frisella and this is the show for the realists say goodbye to the lies
00:00:21.340 the faintness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys today
00:00:27.200 I've got a real talk for you I've got something that's on my mind and heart that I want to share
00:00:31.780 with you and it's nothing new I've shared it with you before but I think it's a good reminder but
00:00:35.520 before I get into it I would like to remind you to pay the fee if you get some value out of this
00:00:42.580 if it makes you think if it makes you laugh if it makes you learn if it gives you a new perspective
00:00:46.940 if it helps you through a tough time whatever it may be if it provided value all we ask is that
00:00:52.200 you share the show we don't run ads I don't run ads for the show or on the show and I do that
00:00:58.260 because I like straight value exchange that's how I think things should work that's how I like to
00:01:03.960 operate so if you like it pay the fee be a good person if you don't like it cool so anyway here's
00:01:16.840 the thing that's the thing that's on my mind and I've been talking about this uh for a few days now
00:01:21.000 on my Instagram because uh it's in the air and I want to give you a realist perspective about this
00:01:29.120 subject okay let me explain something to you when you go out and try to do anything outside the norm
00:01:37.220 and I'm talking anything outside the norm you are going to be faced with negativity you are going to
00:01:44.560 have people misunderstand you and because they misunderstand you and because you are doing
00:01:49.520 something that they don't do whether they agree with what you do or not is irrelevant they're just
00:01:56.560 not familiar with it okay and what do people do when they don't understand things they usually attack
00:02:03.240 them they usually put negativity towards it they usually project their own insecurities and their own
00:02:10.240 reservations about what it is they are incapable of doing and they put them on you and so when you
00:02:17.160 start out in business or you start out on a weight loss journey or you start out to be a better person
00:02:22.300 you are going to face negativity and I don't give a shit what any of these frou-frou fluffy guru
00:02:30.340 motherfuckers out there tell you okay everybody likes to pretend this is an ideal place they like to
00:02:35.740 think that everything's really going to be nice and it's going to be easy and it's going to be this
00:02:40.400 and I just have a really hard time telling you guys that shit because it's not true and that and when
00:02:46.260 you go out and you experience the negativity and you experience these things I'm going to talk about
00:02:50.620 here in just a second um you think it's you and that handicaps people and I don't believe in that
00:02:57.560 this is why I have a big problem with critical race theory this is why people shouldn't be telling
00:03:03.080 people when they're two three four five six years old that they're not going to be able to accomplish
00:03:08.240 things because of the color of their skin this is why you can't allow people to squash dreams in the
00:03:15.700 education system all right when I was in high school I was told and you guys have heard the story I was
00:03:22.060 told very directly Andy you're not cream of the crop you can't go to those schools you're going to have
00:03:28.400 to go to the community college those schools are for cream of the crop and you're not it that stuck
00:03:33.980 with me and luckily I had enough courage and enough spite in me to make these motherfuckers eat their
00:03:41.000 words okay but not everybody does and that's why I want to talk about this today because you need to
00:03:46.540 develop that if you're going to be successful if you can become someone that can transfer negativity
00:03:53.820 into productive action you are literally unstoppable by outside circumstances and outside elements
00:04:01.280 the only person that can stop you when you're able to do this is you and the way you stop you is you
00:04:09.120 can burn yourself down right you can get too negative you can get too hot you can get too frustrated so
00:04:15.640 it's something that you need to learn how to pivot on but also control in a productive way and that's
00:04:21.440 what I'm going to talk about with you guys today so you guys all know what I'm talking about you all
00:04:25.900 have friends that tell you shit like hey man uh what do you think you're too good for us now or you
00:04:31.880 know what I don't think that's a good idea for you to do this or you know what you're too fucking fat
00:04:36.540 to do this or you're too stupid or you're too lazy or you come from this and these are your kind of
00:04:41.540 people you're not one of those kind of people we always hear these things we hear from the people
00:04:46.800 who love us the most and who are supposed to support us the most and it hurts because of that
00:04:52.640 and it slows us down and it makes us question ourself and it squashes our confidence and for
00:04:58.180 most people it makes them give the fuck up and I'm not with that all right I'm here to give you
00:05:03.660 the permission and the tools and the real lessons that you're going to need to move forward and one of
00:05:09.760 them is 100% what I'm talking about here you have to learn to take the negativity that people are
00:05:17.460 going to not might not maybe not it could happen they're going to put it on you and you have to be
00:05:25.960 able to take that energy and flip the switch and move into productive action so since we know these things
00:05:33.420 are going to happen and you are going to be faced with these these negative energies pointing at you
00:05:39.360 from the people that you care most about we know it's going to happen doesn't it make sense to learn
00:05:45.580 how to utilize that for your desired outcome because it does to me and it's been very effective
00:05:51.340 and it doesn't matter what these fucking feel-good motherfuckers say out there this is something you
00:05:55.920 need to learn so I need you to pay attention real quick okay there's two things that you need to
00:06:00.660 understand one the reason these motherfuckers say this shit to you is because they couldn't do it
00:06:06.100 it has nothing to do with you it has nothing to do with you the reason your teachers the reason
00:06:12.340 your parents the reason people close to you the reason people say this negative shit to you has
00:06:18.240 nothing to do with your capabilities it has to do with their capabilities they weren't able to do
00:06:25.040 things they weren't able to execute on their dreams and so because they weren't able to execute on what
00:06:30.760 they really wanted and they settled for something they didn't they now think that that's the normal way to
00:06:35.780 do things because we all look at life through our own perspective we all look at life through our
00:06:39.920 own set of glasses and their glasses say those dreams are for other people obviously I couldn't do it
00:06:45.480 and neither could you because you come from the same place I come from and that's what it is it has
00:06:50.400 nothing to do with you okay so you have to understand that when these people even if it's your parents
00:06:57.080 even if it's your aunts even if it's your uncles even if it's your guidance counselor what they are doing
00:07:02.560 is they are projecting their lack of ability to execute and build onto you okay that's the first
00:07:09.520 thing the second thing because that's going to happen so the second thing is what the fuck do we
00:07:14.480 do with that how do we deal with that it's really simple and I said this on my Instagram story yesterday
00:07:20.100 I'm on the bike I'm sweating my ass off I got swept dripping down my face and I'm thinking to myself
00:07:24.740 I fucking love this and the reason I fucking love it is because of all those motherfuckers that told me
00:07:28.960 I was a fat fuck three or four five six seven years ago on the internet I am so thankful for
00:07:34.000 you guys who did that because now my life is great now I'm very satisfied with who I am and I'm hungry
00:07:40.420 to even go past this point all because you guys threw so much negativity at me for being overweight
00:07:47.120 that I stuck and for that I am indebted all right so you can enjoy me getting better every single year
00:07:55.680 from here on out because of the words that you use and I am very appreciative and I mean that in a
00:07:59.860 very genuine way all right but that's how you need to look at it too okay and what I did was I used a
00:08:05.800 very specific tool that I talk about called a production pivot the production pivot is very simple
00:08:11.480 when you are reminded of something that you need to do or you are given negativity or you are given some
00:08:19.060 sort of discouraging comment towards an area that you know needs to be addressed you use that as a
00:08:25.200 trigger to automatically get up and go take action towards that goal all right so when motherfuckers
00:08:32.840 call me fat I got off the fucking couch and I went for a walk okay that was it and that's what I've
00:08:38.800 learned to do it's very simple when people tell me shit that is negative I take that energy I take
00:08:46.080 that frustration I take that pain and I go address whatever is causing the pain because the reason it's
00:08:52.560 causing pain for you is because it's true all right you have to acknowledge that this is called
00:08:58.400 real AF I'm going to give you the real shit the reason people call you fat is because you're fucking
00:09:02.660 fat you're the one that thinks that that's mean it's not mean it's the truth okay so what do you do
00:09:08.560 with the truth you address the truth and if you address the truth and you're able to be honest with
00:09:13.440 yourself which is a hard thing to do right none of us like being attacked none of us like being told
00:09:19.460 we're less than none of us like but the reason those things hurt is because inside we know they're
00:09:24.260 true if it was complete bullshit right like if some motherfucker came up to me right now and said
00:09:28.640 Andy you're a fat fuck I'd fucking laugh at them I'd rip up my shirt and show them my fucking abs and I'd
00:09:33.940 be like oh really you know like it'd be a joke but when I was fat I'd get really mad because guess what
00:09:40.440 it was true all right and that sucks man it sucks to let yourself go it sucks to be broke it sucks to
00:09:47.980 not have shit going on it sucks to be a loser I've been all those things but the difference is I was
00:09:54.220 able to take the words that other people put on me and to go immediately take action towards the goals
00:10:00.160 so when you're able to use these things guys when you're able to use the negativity into productive
00:10:06.860 action you become someone who cannot be stopped and like I mentioned earlier you can only stop
00:10:11.900 yourself by focusing too much on the negative the key here guys is to use it see it for what it is
00:10:19.160 unemotionally get up go fucking do it all right and work to be better and let it go after that you
00:10:25.360 don't got to hold grudges you don't got to be you don't got to burn yourself down or beat yourself up
00:10:29.080 because you're taking action to fix the problem and you can feel good in that right so that's the
00:10:33.220 first thing the second thing is after a production pivot guys you have to learn to embrace test days
00:10:40.480 okay this doesn't really have as much to do with negativity as it has to do with things just not
00:10:45.800 going the right way we all have days that we wake up and fuck it before you even get out of the
00:10:51.620 driveway you're pissed off all right I know I do literally three four times a week I have that
00:10:57.460 the key to getting through that shit is to not dwell on it and to see it as an opportunity
00:11:05.660 all right when things aren't going your way it's an opportunity to do better it's an opportunity to
00:11:11.860 get stronger it's an opportunity to strengthen your grit your perseverance your fortitude all of
00:11:18.120 these things that make up what it is that you are must have you have to have these qualities to be
00:11:25.260 successful so instead of looking at it as a bad day look at it as an opportunity to push through
00:11:31.400 so that you can move through the day and make a deposit into your skill set that will serve you
00:11:37.140 long term all right this is very simple concept when things don't go your way is an opportunity to
00:11:43.960 test the skill set of mental toughness right which which embodies a whole bunch of different things
00:11:49.300 uh you know self-belief self-confidence fortitude grit perseverance the ability to endure blah blah
00:11:55.580 blah blah blah I could go fucking on and on but the the skill of mental toughness is a skill that you
00:12:01.980 must have and when you have a day that isn't going your way that's a gift and it's a gift because you
00:12:06.520 get to test yourself and when you pass the test and you got through the day and you push yourself
00:12:12.060 through even if you had to drag yourself through every motherfucking step of that day when you get
00:12:17.860 through that day and you look in the mirror you say motherfucker I passed that test nobody can fuck
00:12:22.580 with me that's a powerful thing and you make a deposit into your psyche that reminds you of how
00:12:29.300 badass you really are the reason most people can never cultivate the mental toughness necessary to
00:12:35.400 succeed isn't because uh they weren't gifted with it nobody's gifted with it it's developed most people
00:12:42.040 think that these these skills are actually character traits they're not character traits they are
00:12:47.840 perishable skills meaning if you don't invest in them they will go away if you invest in them they
00:12:54.240 will get stronger just like your arms just like your legs just like all the muscles in your body
00:12:59.600 when you test them they get stronger your life is no different your brain is no different how you see
00:13:07.300 things is no different so the next time you have one of these days where shit just isn't going your
00:13:12.400 way remind yourself that it's an opportunity to grow it's an opportunity to test yourself it's an
00:13:18.560 opportunity to know what the fuck you're actually made of all right this sort of thinking is what
00:13:24.700 champions do this is how they see the world that you guys might be listening here and you're like fuck
00:13:30.120 this guy sounds fucking crazy no this is just the shit nobody wants to admit everybody faces negativity
00:13:37.980 the the highest level most positive performing talking speaking people on earth they all know
00:13:46.620 exactly what the fuck i'm talking about they just don't talk about it because it doesn't sound good
00:13:51.000 it doesn't sound positive it doesn't sound fluffy but i will tell you it is the most effective
00:13:55.760 fucking success tool that you will ever ever cultivate because the amount of negativity that you will face
00:14:02.560 pursuing goals that are outside the norm is unfathomable to people who do not fucking pursue
00:14:09.280 it period okay you are going against the cultural norm of average the cultural norm of sitting on your ass
00:14:17.180 the cultural norm of being a fat ass the cultural norm of all of this average shit when you go against
00:14:23.540 that you are going to naturally have resistance so you need to be prepared you need to invest in learning
00:14:30.000 these skills of the production pivot and the test day and you need to put them into play every single
00:14:35.720 time and if it changes your perspective and it makes you understand that this negativity is actually
00:14:41.220 an opportunity to get stronger how much more powerful can you become you can do anything because that energy
00:14:49.000 source is unlimited in the world especially now especially with the way society is now society isn't about
00:14:56.240 winning anymore it's about fucking going with the flow it's about being happy it's about being healed
00:15:03.400 it's all this fucking shit right and i'm not saying that shit isn't important but what i am saying is
00:15:08.820 when you're driving to achieve and you're driving to be better and you're driving to be stronger and
00:15:13.120 you're driving to be great you are going to face resistance and if you don't know how to handle that
00:15:17.960 resistance it is impossible for you to become who it is you want to become so the production pivot and
00:15:24.740 embracing the test days are two huge things that you need to learn to do literally on a daily basis
00:15:31.780 the next time somebody calls you fat go on a fucking 30 minute walk the next time someone says you ain't
00:15:37.880 going to be shit work on your business plan read a book not and no fucking harry potter shit i'm talking
00:15:44.200 about a book on skills okay the next time someone says uh you know whatever it is take that as an
00:15:50.800 opportunity to turn around and go do exactly what they're addressing to get better and guess what
00:15:56.960 happens when you do this your life becomes the total shove it down motherfucker shit show okay like
00:16:04.420 everything you become becomes exactly what they told you you weren't going to become and i'm going to tell
00:16:10.240 you that feels pretty good i've done it my whole life i've made a career out of it it feels good and i
00:16:16.820 don't care what anybody tells you if anybody tells you any different they ain't fucking done it
00:16:20.520 they're probably a professional fucking coach all right so think about those things think about how
00:16:26.960 much negativity you have think about pivoting that negativity into production action and think about
00:16:32.380 that the next time you have a bad day it's an opportunity to test yourself to see if you really
00:16:36.740 are about what you say you are and if you pass the test you just made a huge deposit into your psyche
00:16:41.940 into your character into who the fuck you are now when you fail the test it takes away when you fail
00:16:48.260 a test it's a withdrawal it makes you feel less than it makes you less confident it makes you less of a
00:16:53.640 believer in yourself so think about these things guys most of you are going through life and you're
00:16:58.800 saying oh man that guy's just a dick or you know what i just had a shitty day and you're missing a
00:17:03.960 huge opportunity to use a tremendous energy source that is out there that is plentiful that will be in
00:17:10.940 your motherfucking face naturally and if you can take the most plentiful energy source that's out
00:17:16.400 there and turn it into productive action what the fuck can stop you nothing went from sleeping on the
00:17:22.600 floor now my jewelry box froze fuck a bowl fuck a stove counted millions in the cold bad bitch booted
00:17:29.260 swole got her on bankroll can't fold doesn't know headshot case closed