SHNEAKO - October 15, 2025


I Showed Up to Jake Future's Birthday Party!


Episode Stats

Length

16 minutes

Words per Minute

141.01382

Word Count

2,346

Sentence Count

140

Misogynist Sentences

8

Hate Speech Sentences

10


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Happy birthday to you!
00:00:04.700 Pick a watch brand. Pick a watch brand.
00:00:06.460 You got AP, you got Rolex, you got Vitek.
00:00:10.200 Low-X. Low-X.
00:00:12.420 You want a Rolex? Why are you looking at me?
00:00:14.280 You!
00:00:30.000 morning it's jake future's birthday party tonight and haven't gotten a present also
00:00:35.920 it's raining a lot don't have an umbrella don't have a present birthday party in five hours
00:00:45.120 apparently they finally identified the united healthcare shooter 26 year old luigi luigi
00:00:52.400 mangione it's the most mr robot plot of all time and the likelihood that he's just been wandering
00:00:58.640 around and probably on the train station with one of us very high
00:01:09.200 i genuinely couldn't tell if that was piss or beer not sure which actually no he's worse
00:01:14.400 this is worse than beer it's raining a lot and the train wasn't working so i'm trying to get a cabin
00:01:20.560 there's no cabs where are the cars where's everyone i got four hours left there we go
00:01:28.640 it's really so stupid i have a luxury apartment in miami with great weather and i chose to come
00:01:36.360 back here in the winter time to step on pee in the train station and be cold that's how much i
00:01:42.600 love this fucking city driver is haitian speaking creole and i kept the lease going in my miami
00:01:48.940 place for times like this when it gets terrible in new york i could take a two-hour flight and i
00:01:52.940 refuse to because i believe once you get a flow state going you don't leave apparently this is
00:01:58.320 shooter and he's a climate change ivy league student some people are saying that he has
00:02:03.600 quotes from ted kaczynski aka the unabomber and i love the unabomber manifesto but don't go out
00:02:09.680 assassinating anybody just don't killing people's bad but as soon as i heard the story i'm like this
00:02:15.080 is very unabomber the ceo of an insurance company that's not doing his job this is uh the ted
00:02:20.960 Kaczynski playbook I'll get out here running late running late absolute
00:02:39.200 Madness
00:02:49.100 For birthday present do you think I should get these or this one?
00:02:59.100 The biggest porn community on Twitter
00:03:01.760 It's called aiden NSFW with like a hundred thousand members because any quotes we did my video from yesterday ban porn on X
00:03:07.600 He said it's morally wrong providing a community that promotes lust and playing a part in porn addiction to over a hundred K people
00:03:14.560 Project X is getting porn off the internet. Let's go man
00:03:19.660 KJ the breath. Well, thank you for the cologne. Wait, do I do I need it? I smell bad
00:03:24.880 I do I smell like coffee. I spilled a little bit of coffee on me
00:03:28.240 Is this it you think it's a good birthday present? Yes
00:03:32.320 Okay, but I don't know if I should get holiday wrapping for a birthday party
00:03:35.320 I don't know where TikTok
00:03:38.120 Tell me what it was
00:03:38.980 And very soon people are going to be like
00:03:40.700 Is that the daily Twitter vlogger?
00:03:43.460 Not the streamer
00:03:44.280 The daily Twitter filmmaker slash editor
00:03:47.800 I feel like while I'm here
00:03:49.680 I could get something for Jake's mom
00:03:52.080 Like a nice little Christmas gift
00:03:54.340 What do women like?
00:03:56.000 Yeah, sure
00:03:56.700 What should I get as a present for a woman?
00:03:59.100 For a woman, you got to get her a perfume
00:04:02.140 You either got to get her
00:04:03.660 Google by Carolina Herrera.
00:04:06.320 Do you know what that is? Let's get it.
00:04:08.860 I'm actually working right now.
00:04:10.300 Oh, you are? Oh, you're going to get that commission.
00:04:12.320 No, no, no, no. I'm doing security.
00:04:14.840 I'm a detective here.
00:04:16.440 You're a detective here?
00:04:18.200 I just got this bag.
00:04:19.880 Oh, someone's trying to steal it.
00:04:20.960 Yeah, bro.
00:04:21.740 Wait, did he get arrested?
00:04:23.100 No, I just had to do a little
00:04:25.180 something about it back.
00:04:27.820 Oh, okay. You beat him up in the basement.
00:04:29.300 but we won't you won't say that i was like yo i feel like i know this guy
00:04:37.120 no that's great i didn't even know that they had private security in here but that makes sense
00:04:41.140 considering it's the holiday season nice to meet you i'm looking to get a present for a woman
00:04:46.740 something the thing is though it says good girl you know it's not for my girlfriend it's for my
00:04:51.480 friend's mom is that weird you can buy the classic original i'm gonna give you a free gift for her
00:04:57.100 okay? Oh, free gift? Yeah. What about free gift for me? Do you want for you? No, it's
00:05:01.560 okay. How do you say Merry Christmas in Dominican? Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad. Okay. Feliz
00:05:07.780 Navidad, wah, wah, wah. What's the name? Wah, wah, wah? No. Wah, wah, wah is like ghetto.
00:05:15.000 Oh, okay. Ghetto. Oh, so don't say that. No, you can do that because it's funny.
00:05:19.300 you are I feel very very stupid playing this game two hours to get there and it's a 90-minute drive
00:05:33.760 so now that this Luigi guy has been apparently identified in killing the United Health CEO
00:05:42.980 inciting Ted Kaczynski as the Unabomber I feel some responsibility to talk about it because I
00:05:47.820 make a whole documentary about the unabomber ted kaczynski lived in the shed in the middle of the
00:05:52.060 woods and was on the fbi most wanted list for about 20 years they only caught him because his
00:05:56.780 blood brother recognized his writing style when he published his manifesto this was pre-internet
00:06:02.300 pre-smartphone and the unabomber wrote about how technology was going to destroy the world
00:06:06.940 and maybe he was right but at the same time he was a victim of mk ultra literally when he was in
00:06:12.060 college he was so high iq the cia did mind control tests on him to figure out how to manipulate his
00:06:18.060 brain they did tests on him they gave him drugs they tried to bring up his trauma they wanted to
00:06:23.100 figure out how to use him as a weapon then ted kozinski went insane he thought that he was a
00:06:27.660 transgender and he had a breaking point in the transgender office in the 70s before it was
00:06:32.780 popular running out and realizing maybe i'm not actually transgender after that he dedicated his
00:06:37.820 life to living alone in the woods and mailing bombs to university professors and to people who
00:06:42.860 were innovating technology and insurance i highly recommend all of you read his manifesto but i also
00:06:48.620 recommend you don't mail bombs to anybody ted was right about the over emotional nature of the
00:06:53.100 liberal and how over socialization was going to destroy the human race a lot of what he predicted
00:06:58.060 and wrote about was right and i'm not surprised that somebody like luigi popped up and tried to
00:07:03.020 go and follow his footsteps and the mk ultra experiments are interesting because although
00:07:07.340 they're not doing it specifically you could see it on a major scale from media and from
00:07:11.980 porn maybe ted kaczynski wasn't the only one going insane
00:07:17.180 now i gotta go home and change t-minus one hour until jay future's birthday party
00:07:31.100 What's messed up about this Luigi guy is when women sell their body on OnlyFans, they get male simps.
00:07:41.880 But when men become serial killers, that's when they get female simps.
00:07:46.540 You're going to see fan edits of Luigi on TikTok in about 30 minutes.
00:07:55.040 And yesterday, congrats to JT who won Solana.
00:07:58.440 And congrats to John Wayne, who won ETH.
00:08:01.780 Good stuff.
00:08:02.420 All you got to do is quote, tweet, like, and reply, and it'll be submitted.
00:08:05.000 You can win some crypto every day.
00:08:07.140 It's a long drive, man.
00:08:08.760 Have you ever been this far in New Jersey?
00:08:13.120 All right.
00:08:14.420 Yeah, like I said, long drive.
00:08:15.600 But Jake Future's one of the coolest people that I know in the industry.
00:08:19.780 So got to come support the boy.
00:08:21.800 I'm in the middle of New Jersey.
00:08:23.480 Dude, let's get in here.
00:08:26.080 How you doing?
00:08:26.700 I'm here for Jake Future's birthday party.
00:08:29.000 Jake?
00:08:29.560 Yeah.
00:08:32.600 I'm sorry.
00:08:33.900 How are you?
00:08:34.440 Is that Jake Future?
00:08:35.940 Yeah.
00:08:39.000 Jake, what up, man?
00:08:40.260 How are you?
00:08:41.680 Happy birthday, bro.
00:08:43.480 Good to see you.
00:08:45.180 Come on, man.
00:08:46.120 Good to see you.
00:08:46.640 Long time, no see.
00:08:48.220 How are you, man?
00:08:49.360 I'm good, man.
00:08:49.940 I'm hungry.
00:08:50.460 You ready to eat?
00:08:51.860 How old are you, by the way?
00:08:53.320 You're 27?
00:08:54.260 Yeah.
00:08:54.700 Oh, you're pushing 30.
00:08:55.580 That's crazy.
00:08:56.060 No, you're pushing 30.
00:08:57.780 I'm 26.
00:08:58.620 I'm not pushing.
00:08:59.180 I'm still mid-20s.
00:09:00.400 You're late 20s.
00:09:01.380 You're in your 40s.
00:09:02.980 I'm not.
00:09:03.480 All right, bro.
00:09:04.340 I'm going.
00:09:06.780 What's the idea you could do next year?
00:09:08.300 A subathon.
00:09:09.560 A subathon.
00:09:10.740 Me and you do a full month subathon.
00:09:14.080 A full month subathon.
00:09:15.620 Yeah.
00:09:16.280 This way is.
00:09:17.100 Hopefully you read my handwriting.
00:09:18.180 For your officially pushing 30.
00:09:19.920 No, you're pushing 30.
00:09:22.040 I got you a present.
00:09:23.240 Aw.
00:09:24.140 Yeah, before you get into the games.
00:09:26.060 you got a time though
00:09:30.240 okay
00:09:30.800 wow that's a lot of time man
00:09:36.800 that's a lot of days
00:09:38.160 regarding like no glaze aside
00:09:40.760 you're one of the cooler people in the industry
00:09:43.440 that I've met that I've linked up with you
00:09:45.180 stay consistent
00:09:45.800 so when you send me the birthday invitation
00:09:47.500 of course I have to come through
00:09:48.480 thanks for inviting me
00:09:50.240 you're welcome
00:09:51.080 and happy birthday man
00:09:52.200 more life to you
00:09:52.920 more life to you
00:09:54.500 is today your birthday today?
00:09:55.620 No Christmas Day
00:09:57.620 Christmas Day
00:09:59.620 Christmas I remember
00:10:01.620 I remember
00:10:07.620 Whatever I'm here
00:10:09.620 I'm here
00:10:11.620 Get a job
00:10:13.620 Get a job
00:10:15.620 Get a job
00:10:17.620 Those are tough
00:10:19.620 I don't know what
00:10:21.620 No I got one just for you
00:10:25.620 Have a good night! Thank you!
00:10:32.620 Why did you have the hat on when you got these?
00:10:35.620 Yeah.
00:10:36.620 Oh, you're fostering than everybody on the internet. No cap.
00:10:39.620 Dang!
00:10:44.620 That's true.
00:10:55.620 I
00:11:25.620 Where I came from? This is where I'm at!
00:11:31.620 Where now?
00:11:32.620 Oh
00:12:02.620 27 27 okay you got to blow out the imaginary candles
00:12:11.660 hey buddy happy birthday goat happy birthday goat how you been doing
00:12:24.540 man man jake when i catch up with you bro when i pull up on your neck
00:12:30.540 Uh, we're gonna, I'm gonna get you, first of all, I'm gonna get you the greatest gift of all time
00:12:35.740 Thank you
00:12:37.020 But man, I've been, uh, a dick, you know, I've just been trying to figure some stuff out
00:12:41.460 But I promise you, dick, no matter what happens
00:12:44.400 I'll be by your side, you'll be by mine, no matter what
00:12:47.680 We promise forever
00:12:48.440 You know, thank you very much
00:12:51.920 You're not gonna get a better gift, look at these shoes
00:12:53.700 Yeah
00:12:57.760 Oh, nah
00:12:59.780 Oh
00:13:05.780 Jake I'm gonna get you some crazy shit this next gift would give you crazy shit. Okay
00:13:12.280 What you tell me this
00:13:14.280 It's a lot of friends pick a lot of friends. You got AP. You got Rolex
00:13:22.780 Are you looking at me
00:13:25.780 Watch not my watch you think
00:13:29.780 Hey, Jake, you look at options.
00:13:31.460 You go look at options, and you get back to me.
00:13:33.660 Okay.
00:13:34.140 When you're off stream, I'm going to have Sneakle give you my new number.
00:13:38.580 Okay.
00:13:39.940 And then just send me what type of options you like.
00:13:43.400 Okay.
00:13:44.120 I sent you his number yesterday.
00:13:45.980 No, I know, but he's on stream.
00:13:47.320 I don't want it to leak.
00:13:48.960 You're on mute.
00:13:50.140 Yeah, yeah.
00:13:51.940 All right, yeah, when he's off.
00:13:53.240 When he's off, it's fine.
00:13:55.960 All right, yo, Jake, I love you, bro.
00:13:57.680 Happy birthday, my brother.
00:13:58.460 I will speak very soon.
00:14:00.620 I'm coming out to New York very, very soon,
00:14:02.540 and I'm going to get you this really, really nice gift.
00:14:04.160 Okay.
00:14:04.660 You're an amazing soul, bro, and I want you to never forget that.
00:14:08.380 Thank you.
00:14:09.000 And I love you, bro.
00:14:09.560 Take care.
00:14:10.340 W Glaze.
00:14:13.080 All right, see you later.
00:14:15.340 Are you feeding me?
00:14:17.400 No, no.
00:14:28.460 you want to get into it you want to go
00:14:32.500 thank you be safe guys okay you too merry christmas everyone
00:14:40.720 just got back from jersey that wasn't that bad of a drive about 40 minutes and my assistant saying
00:14:50.260 not to say this but i have to say it that blew my mind seeing no streamer not only not show up
00:14:56.640 because I understand it's in you know it's out the way but not even respond to his birthday invite
00:15:01.140 going and it's not even anyone specific some people are singling out like the people that he
00:15:04.940 collabs with frequently but Jake messaged every streamer I think he mentioned it everybody that
00:15:11.140 he's met with at the mall and who's been like oh Jake will like show give him hugs and everything
00:15:16.540 like that in public on camera but not only did they not show up which I get they're busy but
00:15:22.360 they didn't even text him back when he sends a flyer and an invitation. And I was telling my
00:15:27.740 assistant, the crazy part is I know how difficult it is for Jake to even send a message. For him to
00:15:33.920 unlock his phone, to press in the photos, to send, that takes him 10 times, 100 times the effort that
00:15:42.080 it takes us. And that's a small inconvenience of our life sending a text. For him, it's genuine
00:15:47.900 an effort. It's not as easy for him to do it as us. Right. And they're all just ignoring it.
00:15:53.720 All of them. I was going, he showed me his phone. He sent the same flyer that I got
00:15:59.040 to the entire industry. None of them replied, not even a reply, not even a happy birth, like
00:16:08.140 blue. That was like a dystopian. I've been streaming for two years. This is another reason
00:16:14.660 why I'm starting Project X
00:16:15.840 and why I'm going to the vlogs.
00:16:17.160 Because the industry's fake,
00:16:19.060 people know that,
00:16:19.960 but this is dark.
00:16:22.280 Dark.
00:16:23.000 People have messaged me
00:16:23.840 like when I hung out
00:16:24.500 with Jake in Miami,
00:16:25.120 like, oh, you hung out
00:16:25.880 with them in Miami first,
00:16:26.760 I was going to take them out.
00:16:27.900 They had the opportunity to
00:16:29.060 and they said nothing.
00:16:32.800 This is an evil world we live in.
00:16:36.260 Peace.
00:16:36.820 Say bye.
00:16:37.880 Bye.