Tate Speech - July 26, 2022


PROOF EGGS AREN'T REAL | Tate Confidential Ep. 116


Episode Stats

Length

19 minutes

Words per Minute

105.524475

Word Count

2,012

Sentence Count

291

Misogynist Sentences

4

Hate Speech Sentences

6


Summary

Tristan and I talk about how to deal with a hangover and why you should be more sober than you are drunk. And why you can't drink more than you can sober up. And how to be a better man if you drink less than you do when you're hungover. And the most masculine essence is to seek risk, to seek adventure. That's what you're supposed to do as a man. And if you're not going to go through life and you don't take risks, as I do, permanently, then you need to accept a part of you has become feminine. You're not meant to be safe, you're meant to take risks. And that's what we're all here to do. We're not here to survive, we're here to live a life that's full of risk and adventure, and that's why we need to drink less and be more drunk. You can't be drunk if you want to be better than you were drunk, bro. You need to be sober. And we're in it for the real world, not the fake world. This episode is brought to you by Vevolution, a production of Gimlet Media.co.nz.uk. If you like what you hear, please leave us a review and tell us what you think of it in the comments section below. We'll be looking out for the next episode, and we'll get back to you next week with a brand new episode of I'm Too Drunk to talk about it in a little bit more sober. Thank you so much for listening to this episode, guys. Love ya. xx - EJ. -Eugene and Gav xx -Josie and Luke xxx -P.S. - I'm not drunk anymore. I don't know what's more drunk than you're drunk anymore, I'm drunk. I know you can be drunk more than I can be sober, but I'm just drunker than you think you are. I'm drinking a lot more. -Evan and I don t care. -Bruh - J.A. and I'm in it now. -J.B. - E. & J. -A. B. - -JOSH - JUICYO - JEAN - JOSIE - JOSH - P. BONUS EPISODES - BOBBY - JORDAN - JAMES - JAMIE - A.J. AND KEVIN - JEROME - JASON - JANE - JAY & KEVAN - SONGS AND KELLY - JACOB - JARAN - PODCAST


Transcript

00:00:02.000 Do you see dice?
00:00:04.000 Any dice on this table?
00:00:05.000 Is there any dice on this table?
00:00:08.000 No guys, this ain't a fucking game.
00:00:10.000 No, this ain't a game.
00:00:12.000 Take confidentiality.
00:00:40.000 Transfer under the embassy network self subsidised police car accompanied by a crew of bloodthirsty
00:00:58.000 I'm driving a Ferrari F12 through Spain.
00:01:27.000 I'm going to the Pyrenees Mountains.
00:01:29.000 I'm going to tear it up all the way to Marbella.
00:01:31.000 After Marbella, I've got to fly back on a private jet to London, pick up the Rolls-Royce Tristan bar, get in the Rolls, drive to Warsaw, Poland, where I left my 812 Superfast.
00:01:40.000 I've been sitting there for six months. Get in that,
00:02:03.000 drive back to Romania and get home just in time to relax for a week before I go to Ukraine, Kiev for the Operator Summit, the War Room Summit.
00:02:11.000 I don't understand how you've met.
00:02:15.000 And this is a message to all men on Twitter.
00:02:17.000 This is not just the people who follow me.
00:02:18.000 I see people with big Twitter accounts, big following.
00:02:22.000 How you live an existence so mundane.
00:02:26.000 Where is your action?
00:02:28.000 Where's your adventure? If you look at my feed, it's non-stop adventure.
00:02:33.000 If you guys are just like, I went to the gym, I read a book, gonna cook dinner now.
00:02:39.000 What the fuck are you doing with your fucking life?
00:02:42.000 You're a man. And the most masculine essence is to seek risk, to seek adventure.
00:02:49.000 That's what you're supposed to do as a man.
00:02:50.000 This is why I never believed the corona shit when all you did, did.
00:02:53.000 You ate it up and lapped it up because you've been conditioned to start thinking like a female.
00:02:58.000 Safety. Oh, let me just look after the kids.
00:03:01.000 Oh, duh, duh, duh. Men, we're not supposed to be safe.
00:03:03.000 We're supposed to get in cars with a hangover and drive as fast as humanly possible across foreign lands looking for pussies.
00:03:11.000 That's what we're supposed to do.
00:03:12.000 I really am amazed that when I look on the Twitter feeds of all these other people who are successful, all of their lives are brutally mundane.
00:03:22.000 Brutally! And they can say, oh, but I'm just happy reading a book.
00:03:25.000 Well, that's good for you. You're just happy reading a book.
00:03:27.000 But if you're going to go through life and you're not going to seek adventure and take risks, as I do, permanently, then you need to accept a part of you has become feminine.
00:03:36.000 That's the reality, because they're out here doing shit.
00:03:38.000 It's not a big deal.
00:03:39.000 It's just a reality.
00:04:01.000 It's a reality.
00:04:51.000 It can't do it! It can't do it!
00:04:53.000 I'm kicking the fuck out of this MTL. They changed something to it, so it just simply cannot handle the turns.
00:05:04.000 Superfast better? Yeah, Superfast takes us all day.
00:05:13.000 You keep saying they're my mates, they're your mates.
00:05:15.000 Look, who are all your friends? These are all your friends.
00:05:18.000 Look at them. I thought nobody liked you.
00:05:20.000 Ah, you know whose fucking friends they are?
00:05:23.000 Fucking Tristan's.
00:05:24.000 They're Tristan's friends. Yeah, they're definitely Tristan's friends.
00:05:27.000 Look, they're about to greet him. Yeah, yeah, Tristan's friends.
00:05:29.000 They're all going to greet him. Yeah, yeah, Tristan's friends.
00:05:31.000 Yeah, they're definitely Tristan's fucking friends.
00:05:33.000 Typical. Typical Tristan.
00:05:36.000 Yeah, that is what Tristan does.
00:05:38.000 Yep. Always has so many friends.
00:05:40.000 Yep. Fucking loser. Ah, so you tried to say they're Tristan's mate, but they're your mate.
00:05:49.000 They're all my mates, yeah. They're all your mates.
00:05:51.000 Look, they're all my mates.
00:05:52.000 They're all your mates.
00:05:54.000 I'm in it. I knew. No, no, no.
00:05:56.000 I'm in it now. Finally.
00:05:58.000 They're all my mates. All your mates.
00:06:02.000 How'd you get all these mates in Spain?
00:06:04.000 We all talk about how we hate you. It's fair.
00:06:06.000 Nobody likes me. Nobody likes you.
00:06:08.000 So what we talk about is the I hate Luke appreciation.
00:06:10.000 I understand now.
00:06:13.000 This is the I hate Luke group.
00:06:14.000 Nice. Welcome to the real world, Lou.
00:06:21.000 This is the real world.
00:07:14.000 Confirmed. I can drink more than Tristan and I can drink less than you.
00:07:18.000 Easily. Guaranteed.
00:07:20.000 100%. You can't drink my snuff.
00:07:23.000 100%. It's not Marcel.
00:07:25.000 He seems confident. Bro, this is the life I live.
00:07:30.000 You can't want to drink better than me.
00:07:32.000 Bro, I can be more sober than you can be.
00:07:38.000 And I can be more drunk than you can be.
00:07:40.000 No, but that's what I mean. You can't have both.
00:07:41.000 I just saw you do it.
00:07:43.000 Bro, I can do it at the same time.
00:07:45.000 Remember that time? Yeah, I remember that time.
00:07:47.000 You remember that time? I remember that time.
00:07:49.000 There's that time.
00:07:51.000 I had loads of alcohol, loads of war, bread, a keto.
00:07:58.000 That's how it is.
00:08:00.000 You can't treat me less than me.
00:08:06.000 And I'm super ready for that competition.
00:08:10.000 Listen, I'll bet you both at the same time.
00:08:12.000 I'll drink more than you, and stay more sober than you.
00:08:16.000 Ooh, that's actually a doable bet.
00:08:19.000 You might stay more sober than me.
00:08:23.000 He has to drink more than you.
00:08:29.000 Where are the shots? You already did this.
00:08:34.000 Where's the shots? I'm here.
00:08:50.000 You're here. He's kind of here.
00:08:53.000 Where's the shots? Where's the shots?
00:08:55.000 Andrew, where's the shots? I don't need shots.
00:08:58.000 No one needs shots.
00:09:00.000 Welcome to the real world, Luke.
00:09:08.000 Yes.
00:09:09.000 In the real world, you drag supercars around the world and order thousands of pounds of food and just drink endlessly.
00:09:14.000 No, steal other people's shit.
00:09:16.000 This is someone else's drink.
00:09:17.000 She literally just brought four beers.
00:09:20.000 Four beers. For someone else that we've taken.
00:09:24.000 It's true. No, they don't want the smoke.
00:09:26.000 No, I'm a booze pirate, you see.
00:09:28.000 I take what I want, I give nothing back.
00:09:30.000 All the booze. You can take mine, give none back.
00:09:34.000 Boy, matey. Or maybe.
00:09:36.000 No, you can't give it back to me.
00:09:38.000 No, but you can take it. That's yours though.
00:09:40.000 If it's yours, you can't give it away.
00:09:41.000 But you're a pirate. Marcel, why do you do this?
00:09:53.000 There's something in my DNA. No, but the eight double whiskeys is coming.
00:09:58.000 It's real. There's something in my DNA that doesn't let me back down for anything.
00:10:03.000 Regardless of what it is.
00:10:05.000 Even if I can't do it, I will do it.
00:10:09.000 He's a superhero. I'll give it to Marlon.
00:10:11.000 Do you believe in X?
00:10:13.000 I still believe in X.
00:10:15.000 Sacks bro.
00:10:19.000 Fuck man, brainwash, brainwash.
00:10:21.000 Sacks.
00:10:25.000 Now this, to the uneducated viewer, they would think this is vodka and apple juice.
00:10:29.000 But is it?
00:10:31.000 Southern comfort and sparkling?
00:10:33.000 What is this, Moscow?
00:10:35.000 That's 100% whiskey.
00:10:37.000 Why'd you do this?
00:10:39.000 I told... It was gonna come!
00:10:42.000 Do you see dice?
00:10:46.000 Is there any dice on the table?
00:10:49.000 There's no dice. This ain't a fucking game.
00:10:52.000 This ain't a game.
00:10:55.000 Two of the same cards.
00:10:56.000 Two of the same? No, it's not the same card.
00:10:58.000 That's the Huracan. It's the Huracan Evo.
00:10:59.000 He diced on his best. He diced.
00:11:03.000 Huh? He didn't dice.
00:11:05.000 He played cards. I don't see any playing cards.
00:11:08.000 Why don't you tell him what? Do you see any playing cards?
00:11:11.000 No. Because this ain't no game!
00:11:13.000 This ain't no fucking game!
00:11:15.000 This ain't a fucking game.
00:11:17.000 What's up, what did you do to us?
00:11:29.000 Why'd you do this?
00:11:32.000 You don't like booze either!
00:11:34.000 Why'd you do this?
00:11:36.000 He doesn't like booze!
00:11:38.000 He's not a boozer!
00:11:39.000 There's a lesson you learned here, kids.
00:11:42.000 Always fuck it up.
00:11:46.000 Uncle Marcel's lesson of the day.
00:11:49.000 I want that. Uncle Marcel's lesson of the day.
00:11:51.000 We're all proud of ourselves.
00:11:53.000 Lesson of the day.
00:11:55.000 Can I see it?
00:11:57.000 Please don't touch my hand.
00:11:59.000 Alright, go in.
00:12:01.000 Let's go do it.
00:12:03.000 Jesus Christ.
00:12:05.000 I thought that was a person.
00:12:07.000 No way did Luke just...
00:12:13.000 Sorry Andrew Russell.
00:12:15.000 No way did Luke just beat you both up.
00:12:17.000 Just beat you both up.
00:12:19.000 I'm out of stuff.
00:12:20.000 I saw the whole thing. He added to Spark and War, but Luke didn't...
00:12:24.000 No? Luke did beat you up.
00:12:30.000 Death before is better than death after.
00:12:34.000 So, are you adding his cousin?
00:12:38.000 What did you say? You might be adding his...
00:12:40.000 What did you just say? It's horrible.
00:12:46.000 He doesn't realize it's trash.
00:12:47.000 It's evil. He's gonna realize.
00:12:50.000 About now. You see.
00:12:53.000 You see. You see there.
00:12:55.000 You see the pain. You guys couldn't see it because I didn't have the camera turned towards me.
00:12:59.000 But that's the pain I felt. You see the pain.
00:13:04.000 Repeat me.
00:13:08.000 I'm not doing that. It's evil.
00:13:10.000 It's evil. You finally beat me.
00:13:15.000 It's evil. I will not down that right now before I eat my food.
00:13:18.000 I know. I will feel horrible for the next three days.
00:13:22.000 I'm going to eat, I'm relaxed, half an hour, and then I'll drink.
00:13:29.000 I'm not doing it though.
00:13:31.000 I'm not doing it.
00:13:33.000 I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it.
00:13:36.000 You did this to us.
00:13:38.000 This didn't need to be real.
00:13:41.000 Kids, fuck up.
00:13:43.000 Listen, when you dance with the devil, you wait for the music to stop.
00:13:47.000 That's why I don't start dancing.
00:13:48.000 He likes to dance. He's a good dancer, huh?
00:13:51.000 He keeps dancing.
00:13:53.000 He keeps starting the dance.
00:13:55.000 Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale room like this?
00:13:57.000 No, I mean, I have.
00:13:58.000 I don't like it. All the desserts.
00:14:02.000 All the desserts, yeah. All the desserts.
00:14:04.000 Can I have four mojitos, please?
00:14:07.000 I knew this, that's why I brought it all now.
00:14:10.000 Vodka and Red Bull.
00:14:14.000 Vodka and juice.
00:14:17.000 That eats you.
00:14:19.000 I'm going dessert.
00:14:22.000 No hot chocolate, thanks.
00:14:26.000 Seriously, that's not dessert.
00:14:28.000 Is it?
00:14:30.000 Dessert means like ice cream, brownies, cookies, sweet, delicious, yeah, man.
00:14:39.000 Poison yeah, and then it's not poison That's dessert A chocolate lava cake.
00:14:51.000 Some sweet tea.
00:14:53.000 I didn't even want dessert and you still ordered me your version of dessert.
00:14:58.000 Two of them. Two servings.
00:15:01.000 It doesn't make sense.
00:15:03.000 The world's tomorrow.
00:15:05.000 I still have my beer.
00:15:09.000 F***
00:15:12.000 I want to change the way we live.
00:15:52.000 It just doesn't make sense.
00:15:53.000 How can X be real?
00:15:55.000 X are real, bro. Listen, I've been thinking about this for a long time.
00:16:00.000 Put some real time in.
00:16:01.000 I think it's actually one of the biggest problems in the world is that the powers that be have convinced everyone that eggs are real.
00:16:07.000 Bro, eggs have to be real.
00:16:08.000 How can they be real? Dinosaurs come from eggs.
00:16:13.000 And chickens. And birds.
00:16:16.000 Yeah, bro. And lizards.
00:16:18.000 From eggs. Black and fried them and eat them.
00:16:22.000 That makes sense. That doesn't make any sense.
00:16:25.000 Could you eat a dinosaur?
00:16:27.000 You might have got me there. Have you ever eaten a dinosaur?
00:16:29.000 No. Maybe eggs aren't real.
00:16:31.000 See, eggs aren't real, bro. And they're hard on the outside and soft on the inside.
00:16:35.000 Doesn't add up. Doesn't add up.
00:16:37.000 Sounds like sacks to me.
00:16:39.000 It just sounds like a big conspiracy.
00:16:41.000 I ordered eggs on the boat.
00:16:43.000 They brought me some potato crushed up.
00:16:45.000 Like, I'm not stupid, bro.
00:16:47.000 That's true. You did order the eggs.
00:16:49.000 like stereo.
00:16:50.000 with this mediocre clip.
00:16:58.000 Now, Black black black black.
00:17:22.000 Black.
00:17:47.000 Yes, sir.
00:17:52.000 Is that conductors?
00:17:57.000 Diver, come on please.
00:18:25.000 Really upsets me it pisses me off actually They're going to go through all this effort.
00:18:29.000 All these police, they're armed, cars, all this shit, just to try and pretend eggs are real.
00:18:35.000 Is that what this is about? Yeah, of course it is.
00:18:37.000 What else is it about? So they stopped me now.
00:18:38.000 They're saying, taking my license. Because I said eggs wasn't real.
00:18:42.000 I was driving to speed the man then.
00:18:43.000 No problem. No problem with the way you're driving, but we heard your opinions on eggs.
00:18:47.000 Where do they hear your opinions? I don't know.
00:18:49.000 They must have microphones around.
00:18:51.000 So now the egg patrol about to take my license.
00:18:57.000 Do you believe in eggs? Do you believe in eggs?
00:19:00.000 Eggs? Yes, do you believe in them?
00:19:02.000 What kind of eggs? Any eggs.