Tate Speech - December 16, 2016


THE HATEFUL TATE EPISODE 16

Hosted by
Mentioned
HATEFUL TATE trailer THE HATEFUL TATE EPISODE 17

Episode Stats


Length

5 minutes

Words per minute

156.32

Word count

792

Sentence count

78


Transcript

Transcripts from "Tate Speech" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:02.000 Foxnow.
00:00:03.000 Fancy a snow foot?
00:00:05.000 Foxnow.
00:00:06.000 The snow should be banned.
00:00:09.000 And Facebook should.
00:00:10.000 You know what they should do?
00:00:11.000 They should.
00:00:12.000 You should have a license to Facebook.
00:00:14.000 You should have to apply and prove you're not a fucking shit munching dickhead before you're allowed to post on Facebook.
00:00:21.000 I keep seeing the same shit by morons day in, day out.
00:00:25.000 I scroll up and down through this fucking thing on my phone and it genuinely pisses me off.
00:00:31.000 The number of people sharing. Motivational quotes who have precisely zero of their own money.
00:00:37.000 One.
00:00:39.000 Or fucking guys who think it's cool to take pictures of themselves on holiday, like holding their chick's hand while their chick leads them, I call it some spiritual path, down fucking Magaluth High Street.
00:00:52.000 Fuck you.
00:00:53.000 Fuck your ugly girlfriend.
00:00:54.000 Let me tell you something.
00:00:56.000 If you have a child, the best thing you can do is never ever post about it on social media because I can absolutely guarantee nobody gives a fuck.
00:01:05.000 I can guarantee you, Jacob just had his first food and he's two.
00:01:09.000 No one gives a fuck if Jacob lives or dies, let alone eats food.
00:01:13.000 That's the first thing.
00:01:14.000 And taking that into consideration, it's very difficult to explain how much people don't care about an ultrasound.
00:01:21.000 Baby's not even born, baby's not even finished growing.
00:01:24.000 It's half a deformed baby in a black and white image.
00:01:28.000 No one gives a fuck.
00:01:29.000 All you're saying is Jacob's crackers, basically.
00:01:32.000 Jacob's crackers.
00:01:33.000 From now on, next time I see an ultrasound, every ultrasound I see I'm going to take and make it as my own display picture.
00:01:39.000 For zero reason.
00:01:40.000 I'm gonna see some other person's ultrasound of their shit kid.
00:01:43.000 I'm gonna take it and make it my own display picture.
00:01:45.000 And then update my status saying, I'm so excited I can't wait.
00:01:49.000 And wait for the hate mail to start from the father or the mother or someone.
00:01:52.000 And just sit there and just pretend I have no idea why they're upset.
00:01:55.000 That's my new fucking policy.
00:01:56.000 Fuck you.
00:01:56.000 Fuck your ultrasounds.
00:01:57.000 Fuck your kid.
00:02:00.000 No snowfuck?
00:02:01.000 No.
00:02:02.000 Fuck snow.
00:02:04.000 Fuck snow.
00:02:05.000 Snow's the reason why Aston Martin isn't here.
00:02:07.000 Once Andrew had finished being completely detestable and hateful, And we finally agreed to talk about the package.
00:02:15.000 So we met a man for some beans.
00:02:17.000 Not breakfast.
00:02:19.000 This is not breakfast.
00:02:20.000 This is dinner in Romania.
00:02:23.000 Beans and egg.
00:02:30.000 Finished?
00:02:33.000 Action.
00:02:36.000 So that package that you need to receive, you know, you have big problems with the customs.
00:02:41.000 We need to bring it here in Romania.
00:02:43.000 They want to find you.
00:02:44.000 So, what do they even want?
00:02:46.000 because I've been emailing to people in Switzerland, I've emailed people in Thailand, and everyone's saying different numbers and different.
00:02:52.000 Yeah, the problem was like this, you know, you don't have all the paperwork, so now in Romania, because now you're a Romanian resident, you know, you need to make a special invoice for you, you know, with your name, with your code and everything, with your residence and your name.
00:03:06.000 And I have to pay import taxes, is this so I can pay taxes?
00:03:08.000 Yeah, you need to pay taxes, you need to pay fine now, because they say that because you want too much away, Take it away, so I said, No, don't take it away.
00:03:18.000 We're going to come, so now we're going to pay some fine.
00:03:21.000 It's going to be a nightmare, you know.
00:03:23.000 We need to go tomorrow morning at ASP to make the paperwork.
00:03:26.000 If not, they're going to take away the package.
00:03:29.000 Where do we have to go to?
00:03:31.000 So, after all that, the package was still as mysterious as Andrew is detestable.
00:03:36.000 Problems at customs, but it was time to get boogey.
00:03:38.000 Met a man called Ruben, a photographer, and a quite terrifying man.
00:03:45.000 He tried to educate me on Romanian history, which I appreciated.
00:03:48.000 Felt far too comfortable and made the mistake of calling him the loveliest gypsy I'd ever met.
00:03:55.000 To which he replied, If you weren't with Tristan, I would have killed you.
00:04:02.000 I believe him.
00:04:03.000 Andrew was with his regular harem.
00:04:05.000 Tristan, as usual, was boozing.
00:04:08.000 And this is me looking terrified and scared when he tries to touch my hair.
00:04:13.000 Lovely snow, innit?
00:04:23.000 Fuck snow.
00:04:32.000 This is me being incognito.
00:04:34.000 I'm looking hungover and stinking of whiskey.
00:04:39.000 It was only a matter of time.
00:04:40.000 Coffee.
00:04:42.000 Huh?
00:04:44.000 Do you smell some coffee yet?
00:04:48.000 A coffee machine.
00:04:51.000 You need to stop this.
00:04:54.000 Stop?
00:04:55.000 Finish?
00:04:55.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:04:58.000 So, I was not allowed in to talk about the package, but instead had to stand outside in the cold.
00:05:03.000 Fantastic.