Anthony Cumia and Jim Norton on the Unspoken Rules of Comedy Clubs ｜ 05-10-26
Episode Stats
Harmful content
Misogyny
11
sentences flagged
Toxicity
32
sentences flagged
Hate speech
4
sentences flagged
Summary
On this episode of the WABC minicast, host Anthony Conley is joined by co-host Jimmy Norton. The guys talk about what it's like being an idiot on the air, how to get reimbursed for your travel expenses, and how to turn in a year's worth of expenses on time.
Transcript
00:00:00.000
On the biggest stage in the world, FanDuel is changing the game
00:00:04.100
because sometimes your player gets subbed off and your bet goes with them.
00:00:08.460
With FanDuel's Super Sub, if your player's subbed out, your bet stays in.
00:00:13.380
If your player leaves a match, your bet continues on with the substitute,
00:00:25.300
21-plus select states for Kansas in affiliation with Kansas Star Casino.
00:00:29.020
18 plus dckywy gambling problem call 1-800-GAMBLER 1-800-MY-RESET 888-789-7777 visit ccpg.org
00:00:38.260
slash chat connecticut visit md gambling help.org maryland visit gambling help line ma.org call
00:00:44.660
800-327-5050 massachusetts call 877-8-HOPE-NY text hope ny in new york call 877-770-7867
00:01:23.840
Had great dinner, Jimmy, sitting there laughing with Jim, having a nice dinner together at a fine restaurant.
00:01:45.940
Do you know my contract for here actually says that I can be reimbursed or I am reimbursed for travel here, for the hotel, for food, for everything every month because I come up about once a month to do the show from the studio.
00:02:01.660
I may be put in two since the time I started.
0.99
00:02:29.200
Something like that I'm actually pretty good with.
00:02:31.020
Like getting, oh, the old Mike's doing the old stuff.
00:02:36.400
Guys, if you could see that, you'd be laughing along with us.
00:03:18.080
I'm going to meet with my boss and be like, hey, could I turn in a year's worth of expense?
00:03:23.340
Probably not, but I mean, you'll go, look, here's the thing why I'm lying.
1.00
00:03:27.800
If I'm presented as me being an idiot, which is why I was hired in the first place.
1.00
00:03:33.820
See, this is where you're stupid for saying it on the air, because you should have lied
1.00
00:03:36.840
and said, I thought my accountant was doing this the whole time.
1.00
00:03:40.240
He's out, he's not, but now you can't because we're talking about it on the air.
00:03:46.000
Cut that part out so the boss don't hear it.
0.87
00:03:59.560
Let's pick the lock and go in the office and take the tickets to give them away to our listeners.
00:04:07.100
me and opie did that on uh waaf yeah let's get in there and oh it's a big thing and the listeners
0.99
00:04:16.500
were like yeah you guys are awesome it's like you're stupid it was a little less hacky then
0.91
00:04:22.100
than it is now i hope so because everything we did in today's standard of broadcasting
0.99
00:04:29.000
would be considered unbelievably hacky and terrible yeah it's uh those things those little
00:04:34.280
But I'm in a car sometimes or an Uber going somewhere, and I'll hear the guy listening, and he's listening to War of the Roses.
00:04:46.100
I think legally you're not even allowed to do prank phone calls on the radio.
00:04:51.340
It's very limited as far as states that would allow that.
00:04:55.320
But I think the vast majority, you have to go, hi, and you've got to do this off the air.
00:05:01.540
You can't even ask them if you can put them on the air.
00:05:09.640
Now, if you call in like our wonderful callers here, it's different.
00:05:15.120
So that's why you know all those old radio gags.
00:05:19.560
He sent the roses to his girlfriend instead of his wife.
00:05:28.200
they think everyone's an academy award-winning actor no it's like me in an audition
00:05:34.600
the hands at least you don't have to know what to do with your hands in the radio it's not that
00:05:42.360
bad no i know but if you see the cameras on me they're always just kind of up here hanging
00:05:45.540
i every movie i watch you and sometimes things will pop up and and you're in it and i always
00:06:00.160
Or did it just kind of happen with the main character
00:06:22.680
brilliant and it looks great i saw an actor what the hell is it who's that english actor
00:06:28.780
steve coogan no Michael Caine Michael Caine and he was uh doing something showing how
00:06:36.460
eye contact and where the camera is and it was like oh my god how the hell does he even know
00:06:42.920
to do this and it looks you could tell what he meant you could see it he said if you want to
00:06:47.940
appear more ominous don't don't blink don't yeah don't he goes don't uh when you look someone in
00:06:54.100
the eye and raise your head don't do that he goes look at their eye first and then raise your head
00:06:59.460
yeah it was just a really interesting adjustment and pick one eye don't go back and forth between
00:07:04.980
the two eyes that's right one eye and don't blink and he did the example of both of those
00:07:09.420
and it was so it was stunning how amazing it was that's why i haven't been able to look ominous
00:07:44.380
And it's like, have you ever, the cops should always super, like the cop will walk in and
00:07:56.040
Colin was so great at parodying that on the cop show that they did.
00:08:11.040
But I found that Colin at times thought that my appearance was fodder for mockery.
00:08:20.160
Like he said that my face represented toxic waste.
00:08:38.260
Yeah, you guys do give each other the business a lot.
00:08:44.980
I sometimes will tell people Colin because he's not a nice person.
00:08:50.020
He said I look like a human cashew, which bothered me.
00:08:57.460
And then he went on after me, and he said I look like a garlic nut.
00:09:09.420
Didn't he call Bob Kelly, Bob looks like a souvenir you pick up at the Beijing airport?
00:09:18.800
And he also had a very funny line on Stern Roast.
0.96
00:09:22.080
They were, I guess, doing, he said to Bob Boy Gary, he said, you're either a very ugly man or a very handsome fish.
00:09:28.620
and of course uh i have been dubbed and to this day people still call me a back alley tunisian
0.74
00:09:39.880
knife fighter a perfect description kurt metzger he said looked like a bosnian war criminal
00:09:45.160
and he does he's very very uh good at that uh yeah i i do miss uh a lot of those guys i just
00:09:55.300
don't uh of course being in south carolina then when i got kind of banned from the comedy cellar
00:10:00.960
that was uh i forgot i'm terrible i forgot but i gotta go i was i totally forgot about that i
00:10:06.680
actually um i was told to go on hiatus from the cellar which is pretty much being banned but it
00:10:13.960
has this little glimmer of i can come back noam was like yeah because i think i had so many comics
00:10:21.080
in there that had problem with me and he doesn't like when the comics are uncomfortable there but
00:10:26.820
you know he didn't really take into consideration why i had problems with some of the comics
00:10:31.920
whatever it might have been i i i think the uh uh the bill burr and then uh or the club soda
00:10:39.980
kenny thing was i mean this i would say it doesn't help it doesn't help a situation it doesn't help
00:10:46.380
but I always enjoyed going there and sitting down for the chicken skewers and
00:11:16.140
there little little wings and stuff it had nothing to do with food the comic was making a vegan joke
0.98
00:11:21.200
and he said vegans were losers baby and these girls started booing him like literally boo like
0.95
00:11:28.440
vaudeville just and he commented on it and and said a few things and uh they were kicked out
0.99
00:11:36.100
like the cellar and those clubs they don't put up with they throw you out immediately you get thrown
00:11:41.040
out it's not one of these clubs where oh what a great back and forth between the guy in the crowd
00:11:45.780
they will throw you out there's plenty of people that want that seat um so they they they got
00:11:53.140
kicked out and then they're recording themselves in front of the cellar going can't believe they
00:11:56.700
kicked us out we didn't do anything wait and then the comic put a video up of him doing the and and
00:12:03.400
you hear them boo and he goes this is the third time i've told you to be quiet shut up yeah they
00:12:08.960
never think they're doing anything wrong i was just laughing oh no you weren't no one gets thrown
00:12:14.280
If you don't get thrown out of a funeral for laughing, you're not going to get thrown out of a comedy club.
00:12:18.240
They think it's like a movie or a TV show where the heckler is quick-witted.
00:12:25.760
And it's a good repertoire or rapport between the comic and the heckler.
00:12:42.020
If you sneeze while I'm on, I hate your guts.
0.92
00:12:45.900
Do you know, I was doing, I was closing my show.
0.95
00:12:49.080
This happened to me a couple of times where I was closing the show.
00:12:59.740
I'm literally in my closing bit and he falls on the floor and has a seizure.
00:13:04.780
So now I kind of have to just talk people through this as we wait for paramedics.
00:13:08.380
I have to pretend that I'm concerned and not annoyed that he messed up my last bit.
00:13:12.940
And that also happened to me when I was in San Diego.
00:13:16.880
I was doing the American comedy, whatever, and a guy fell on the floor drunk or whatever.
00:13:27.080
Because he might have been drunk or tired, but I have to pretend I'm concerned.
00:13:30.660
I want to just go, couldn't you die quietly on the toilet in the bathroom?
0.91
00:13:40.560
Well, those people, I don't think it's by choice,
00:13:42.700
but they don't get it when they're interrupting the comedian.
00:13:50.020
There's a room full of people that want to see a comic,
00:13:52.460
and you're injecting yourself into this like you're integral to the act.
00:13:57.520
There's no penalty for that, which I would feel is too harsh.
00:14:00.560
Like if there was a video of somebody heckling and a comic
00:14:32.640
When you travel well, your KLM Royal Dutch Airlines ticket
00:14:39.100
It takes you to winding streets, spontaneous detours
00:14:42.820
and the realisation that neither of you is actually good with directions.
00:14:48.480
And when the final shortcut taken isn't exactly short,
00:14:53.260
our crew is here to give you a trip home that goes just as planned.
00:15:03.600
A Safer Ontario means more police and prosecutors making sure my car doesn't get stolen.
00:15:08.700
It means building new jails to keep criminals behind bars.
00:15:12.200
And it means there's no need to worry when I play at the park.
00:15:15.600
We're making every corner of Ontario safer to make all of Ontario safer.