The Golden One - December 21, 2014


Nord of Skyrim Chapter 7


Episode Stats


Length

38 minutes

Words per minute

93.41308

Word count

3,613

Sentence count

582

Harmful content

Misogyny

20

sentences flagged

Toxicity

160

sentences flagged

Hate speech

25

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, the heroes of the Dawnguard find themselves in the midst of a massive vampire attack, and they need a new weapon to fight back. Will they be able to handle it, or will they have to run for cover?

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Greetings, you proud sons of Skyrim!
00:00:13.000 Guess where I'm at.
00:00:16.000 Dayspring Canyon, and it's a nice day back in Skyrim.
00:00:21.000 We're not in Solstheim anymore.
00:00:24.000 Hello, hello!
00:00:26.000 Yep.
00:00:30.000 Why are you nervous?
00:00:32.000 That's not a very good attitude to go into a job interview.
00:00:39.000 Basic advice right here. 0.99
00:00:41.000 Don't be nervous, be confident as fuck. 0.99
00:00:44.000 And then there will be like, Fwa Myrin. 1.00
00:00:48.000 Myrin.
00:00:51.000 So yeah, Fort Dawnguard, and we're here.
00:00:54.000 Like, this place is just so beautiful.
00:00:57.000 I don't even...
00:00:58.000 I can't even find words to describe how beautiful Skyrim can be sometimes.
00:01:04.000 Hello, mate.
00:01:05.000 You're looking juicy.
00:01:07.000 Durak.
00:01:09.000 That is one juicy Pale Orc. 1.00
00:01:12.000 I'm certain of it.
00:01:15.000 Oh, wrong way. 0.99
00:01:17.000 So yeah, we're gonna slay some vampires. 0.94
00:01:19.000 And I, I for one, true friends, I cannot wait to get my hands on a crossbow. 0.96
00:01:24.000 And I don't know if you can see it, but I'm so fucking excited for this.
00:01:29.000 I'm excited that you're watching this and I get to game this with you. 0.96
00:01:33.000 So it really feels sickening that you're here with me in fucking Skyrim that we all love. 0.98
00:01:42.000 And we're gonna get a crossbow and we're gonna admire me when I slay. 0.99
00:01:48.000 Thanks.
00:01:49.000 Why are you here, Tolan?
00:01:51.000 The vigilance and I were finished with each other a long time ago.
00:01:55.000 You know why I'm here.
00:01:57.000 The vigilance of testosterone.
00:01:58.000 The vigilance are under attack everywhere.
00:02:00.000 The vampires are much more dangerous than we believed.
00:02:03.000 And now you wanna come running to safety with the Dawnguard, is that it?
00:02:07.000 Yeah.
00:02:13.000 How dare they talk to him like that.
00:02:15.000 Greetings, true friend.
00:02:16.000 So who are you?
00:02:18.000 That is an Indian true friend, actually.
00:02:20.000 I'm here to join the Dawnguard. 1.00
00:02:22.000 You're so silly. 1.00
00:02:26.000 I do. 1.00
00:02:27.000 I fucking hate vampires. 1.00
00:02:28.000 No, like, I don't. 1.00
00:02:29.000 I don't hate vampires at all.
00:02:31.000 I like vampires. 0.97
00:02:32.000 But not the gay sparkly ones popularized by... 1.00
00:02:36.000 The Twilight Saga. 0.98
00:02:37.000 Not those kind of vampires. 1.00
00:02:38.000 I need someone out of the field taking the fight to the damn vampires. 1.00
00:02:41.000 While we're getting the fort back into shape. 0.99
00:02:43.000 Tolan was telling me about some cave the vigilance were poking around in.
00:02:47.000 Seem to think it was related to these recent vampire attacks.
00:02:50.000 The vigilance.
00:02:51.000 They...
00:02:52.000 They're cool.
00:02:53.000 Tell him about what was it.
00:02:54.000 Dim Hollow.
00:02:56.000 Hey, man.
00:02:57.000 Yes, that's it.
00:02:58.000 Tell me.
00:02:59.000 Dim Hollow Crypt.
00:03:00.000 Brother Adelwald was sure it held some long-lost vampire artifact
00:03:05.000 of some kind.
00:03:06.000 We didn't listen to him anymore than we did Israel. 0.91
00:03:08.000 For those of you who play Warhammer, this actually looks like a warrior priest.
00:03:13.000 Of Sigmar.
00:03:14.000 That's good enough for me.
00:03:16.000 Go see what the vampires were looking for in this dim Hollow Crypt.
00:03:20.000 Okay.
00:03:21.000 With any luck, they'll still be there.
00:03:24.000 Here.
00:03:25.000 You should take a crossbow. 0.89
00:03:26.000 Good for taking out those fiends before they get clutched. 0.96
00:03:29.000 All waiting for.
00:03:30.000 Feel free to poke around the fort and take what you need.
00:03:32.000 Ah.
00:03:33.000 Cheers, main.
00:03:34.000 That's it.
00:03:35.000 That's it, main.
00:03:36.000 That's it.
00:03:37.000 Okay.
00:03:38.000 We're gonna go there.
00:03:39.000 And then I will tell you some fun...
00:03:42.000 Awakening.
00:03:43.000 Dim Hollow Crypt.
00:03:48.000 Okay.
00:03:49.000 Let's head there.
00:03:50.000 Okay, cool.
00:03:51.000 So I've actually been to 4chance.
00:03:54.000 Slash poll.
00:03:55.000 Okay.
00:03:56.000 Politically incorrect quite some time. 0.99
00:03:58.000 Because I know my Fuck Feminists video got linked there. 1.00
00:04:05.000 So I checked that place out. 0.95
00:04:09.000 And obviously some good discussions. 0.85
00:04:12.000 But it's so fucking unnecessarily aggressive. 0.87
00:04:17.000 And I don't really like that. 0.95
00:04:19.000 It's almost like...
00:04:22.000 You wanna be rude and aggressive before somebody else can be rude and aggressive to you.
00:04:28.000 And that whole attitude is just so...
00:04:30.000 So I mean everyone...
00:04:31.000 Everyone is degenerate and it's wrong with everyone.
00:04:34.000 There's not single people that is cool like... 0.89
00:04:37.000 And everyone is just hating on each other.
00:04:39.000 Like obviously I appreciate the...
00:04:42.000 The freedom of speech and that you're...
00:04:45.000 You know keeping it real.
00:04:48.000 And you know you have the...
00:04:50.000 You can think for yourself.
00:04:52.000 But like don't... 0.98
00:04:54.000 Don't be negative and aggressive just for the fucking sake of it. 0.98
00:04:57.000 You know... 0.99
00:04:58.000 Your quality of life will not be increased by being mad.
00:05:02.000 Constantly.
00:05:08.000 Alright, cool.
00:05:09.000 I utilized a quick little edit there to get on the proper path.
00:05:12.000 And also to adjust my hair.
00:05:14.000 Um...
00:05:16.000 I can't take myself seriously if my hair isn't perfect.
00:05:19.000 So yeah, it's talking about politically incorrect.
00:05:22.000 And now obviously they got raided hard by Tumblr.
00:05:26.000 So...
00:05:27.000 Tumblr will have to pay for that.
00:05:29.000 And now obviously...
00:05:33.000 I like...
00:05:34.000 Look at this.
00:05:35.000 You know...
00:05:36.000 Politically incorrect.
00:05:38.000 Just because you are politically incorrect.
00:05:40.000 But...
00:05:42.000 A bit...
00:05:43.000 A bit aggressive.
00:05:47.000 And a bit hostile.
00:05:48.000 I mean...
00:05:51.000 I saw one thread where the Celtic culture was described as degenerate.
00:05:56.000 And then...
00:05:57.000 I just...
00:05:58.000 Yeah...
00:05:59.000 I didn't even know what to say or think.
00:06:03.000 Like...
00:06:04.000 I haven't written anything...
00:06:06.000 On 4chan in about a year.
00:06:08.000 But...
00:06:10.000 Yeah...
00:06:11.000 I mean...
00:06:12.000 How can you say that Celtic culture is degenerate when it's standard?
00:06:15.000 Like...
00:06:16.000 In the time of the Romans... 0.99
00:06:17.000 Ireland was not conquered by the Romans. 0.98
00:06:20.000 And they had a high fucking standing culture. 0.98
00:06:22.000 And then like... 0.97
00:06:23.000 Celtic... 0.89
00:06:24.000 Vigilants never know when to give up.
00:06:26.000 Isn't even...
00:06:27.000 An...
00:06:28.000 Like...
00:06:29.000 That's a cultural thing.
00:06:30.000 And they had...
00:06:31.000 You know...
00:06:32.000 Survive...
00:06:33.000 Till this very day.
00:06:34.000 So how can you say it's degenerate?
00:06:35.000 It's not degenerate at all. 1.00
00:06:36.000 It's fucking glorious as fuck. 0.99
00:06:37.000 I mean... 1.00
00:06:38.000 Celtic jewellery?
00:06:40.000 How about that?
00:06:41.000 Like...
00:06:42.000 So...
00:06:43.000 No.
00:06:44.000 This one...
00:06:45.000 It was not a true friend who wrote those hurtful things.
00:06:47.000 Is that?
00:06:48.000 Perhaps another Vigilant will wander in soon.
00:06:51.000 Oh...
00:06:52.000 Yeah...
00:06:53.000 Yeah, I'm not a bit of vigilance, though.
00:06:55.120 How dare you talk to me like that?
00:06:58.580 Okay, you didn't really talk, but...
00:07:00.580 But anyway.
00:07:04.120 Okay, let us do like this, true friends.
00:07:07.080 Now I got all riled up because...
00:07:09.580 Because the hurtful...
00:07:13.580 Words said against my Celtic, true friends.
00:07:19.280 Because I think the Celtic culture, obviously, since it was dominant...
00:07:27.280 Wow.
00:07:29.280 That was powerful, but it was only a fledgling, so...
00:07:33.980 Look at that.
00:07:37.600 Light armor.
00:07:40.360 That's cool. I like it.
00:07:42.560 I'm gonna take it and see if I...
00:07:45.560 Okay, I regret that. I will not do that.
00:07:49.280 And...
00:07:51.940 Disregard.
00:07:54.140 Disregard.
00:07:59.160 And...
00:07:59.560 74.
00:08:02.060 Oh, wow. So it's...
00:08:03.600 It was quite fucking bad, to be honest. 0.72
00:08:05.820 Hello! 0.99
00:08:07.180 Hello, vampire.
00:08:08.720 Do you want to box with me?
00:08:13.280 That, true friends, is exactly how you deal with...
00:08:16.280 With vampires.
00:08:19.280 And...
00:08:20.280 This place is just awesome. 0.94
00:08:37.140 As I said, like, that's why I fucking love Skyrim. 0.92
00:08:39.460 Oh, look at that. 0.94
00:08:42.800 Orkish sort of flames, but I don't want to get over-encumbered. 0.81
00:08:46.580 So I'm gonna leave that be for now.
00:08:51.540 There we are.
00:08:52.460 Ah, sickening.
00:08:53.620 Some juicy potions of wisdom.
00:08:55.720 That would be cool, though, if you're studying, and then you can take, like, a potion of wisdom, so you learn, like, you remember everything.
00:09:04.620 I know there actually are some, like, a few techniques you can do.
00:09:08.620 If you chew, like, bubblegum, or, you know, eat something while you're reading a thang. 0.99
00:09:16.420 And then later on, if you eat the same thing, you will be better at remembering it.
00:09:23.620 Sick. 0.98
00:09:25.620 Sickening. 0.97
00:09:26.620 Is that actually...
00:09:31.620 No.
00:09:36.260 I suppose that there are...
00:09:38.620 Oh, hello!
00:09:40.580 Hello, hello.
00:09:45.620 Hello.
00:09:46.580 She actually said that.
00:10:04.780 Hello, gorgeous.
00:10:09.020 That's also cool.
00:10:10.320 I wish that they were, um, just better, so I could utilize it.
00:10:15.140 Now I'm gonna go with my elven armor of sickeningness and glory. 1.00
00:10:19.740 Perhaps I get a new dawn god, um...
00:10:23.740 Armor, though.
00:10:25.720 Ah!
00:10:28.760 Nice.
00:10:29.500 I'm gonna, um...
00:10:31.820 Enchant some flanks right now.
00:10:34.500 Disenchant.
00:10:36.380 Disenchantment...
00:10:37.140 Yes.
00:10:39.060 Yeah, I'm gonna just, um...
00:10:42.380 Disenchant everything here.
00:10:43.800 So we can make something nice later on.
00:10:49.400 Ah, look at that.
00:10:50.340 I'm just leveling away.
00:10:51.940 Perhaps I can...
00:10:54.320 Can...
00:10:55.800 Can actually...
00:11:01.560 Level up.
00:11:07.940 That would be, uh...
00:11:08.800 Ah, yes.
00:11:11.900 Yes.
00:11:13.740 Mercwood, yes.
00:11:15.980 And then, obviously, speaking of political incorrect and, uh...
00:11:19.420 You know, internet forums and stuff like that.
00:11:22.220 Uh...
00:11:23.220 Sweden, yes, jokes.
00:11:25.560 I've talked about them before.
00:11:27.060 And, um...
00:11:28.660 And, um...
00:11:29.660 I mean, uh...
00:11:33.540 A lot of it is not true at all.
00:11:36.020 But a lot of it is also true.
00:11:37.840 Um...
00:11:38.840 So, um...
00:11:44.380 I mean, yeah.
00:11:45.420 Double-check the source.
00:11:47.240 Uh...
00:11:47.520 Or, uh...
00:11:47.960 Just...
00:11:48.960 Take it from a Swedish person. 1.00
00:11:50.480 If you hear something.
00:11:51.480 You can ask me.
00:11:52.740 Uh...
00:11:53.300 Elven boots, superior.
00:11:58.800 Okay, cool.
00:12:02.520 Pickpocket.
00:12:03.100 No.
00:12:05.120 Ah!
00:12:05.920 That's, uh...
00:12:06.720 Brilliant.
00:12:07.140 I want, um...
00:12:08.360 I want that. 0.67
00:12:10.820 Ah, sickening. 0.99
00:12:12.080 Sickening. 0.98
00:12:13.560 Elven helmet, superior.
00:12:16.300 Restoration.
00:12:18.880 Okay, so we don't really have anything...
00:12:21.300 That's...
00:12:23.020 Decent, I suppose.
00:12:26.080 And now...
00:12:27.480 Do we have a greater soul gem?
00:12:29.540 Item...
00:12:32.080 Um...
00:12:33.960 A gold ring, perhaps?
00:12:36.500 And...
00:12:37.300 Enchantment...
00:12:40.120 Block.
00:12:41.340 Yes.
00:12:44.460 There we go!
00:12:46.200 How about that, true friends?
00:12:47.880 Okay, where, um...
00:12:49.060 Where were we, even?
00:12:49.960 Before I...
00:12:52.740 Digressed.
00:12:54.360 Don't really know if you say...
00:12:55.900 Did you say digressed? 1.00
00:12:58.780 Oh, fuck. 1.00
00:13:14.160 Ah, fuck. 1.00
00:13:15.040 Ah, fuck. 1.00
00:13:19.960 How dare you! 1.00
00:13:28.300 Okay, time for, uh...
00:13:30.540 Time for a shout, now.
00:13:36.760 Utilize the quicksave.
00:13:37.960 Okay, come at me. 1.00
00:13:39.240 Come at me, bre. 1.00
00:13:42.620 Come at me, brew. 1.00
00:13:43.400 Ah, fuck. 1.00
00:13:51.560 Ah, fuck. 1.00
00:14:02.620 Fucking, uh... 1.00
00:14:03.780 Some scary... 1.00
00:14:05.020 Scary shit right there. 0.99
00:14:06.980 But that's... 1.00
00:14:07.880 That's what I love about the Dawn God. 0.99
00:14:09.700 That is fucking, um... 0.99
00:14:12.180 Nightmarish mode. 1.00
00:14:14.480 Um...
00:14:15.080 Ah, look at that.
00:14:18.420 A collar.
00:14:19.060 Dog meat.
00:14:22.560 Cool.
00:14:23.480 I'm gonna...
00:14:24.700 Utilize, uh...
00:14:25.940 Quick weight, so I...
00:14:27.260 I heal up.
00:14:29.260 My hair is...
00:14:30.980 Yeah, okay.
00:14:33.400 It's, um...
00:14:34.320 It's good enough, I suppose.
00:14:36.960 I hope it looks good.
00:14:39.980 Either way, let us...
00:14:42.780 I'm actually gonna switch to my sword now, so I don't, uh... 0.98
00:14:46.560 So I don't find myself in one of those situations where I have a fucking dog charging it. 0.99
00:14:52.620 Coming at me, bro. 0.99
00:14:53.520 And, uh... 1.00
00:14:55.640 Fucking juicy guns as well. 1.00
00:14:57.740 And I don't really have anything, um... 1.00
00:15:00.240 You know, I stand with a fucking crossbow and getting charged. 0.98
00:15:02.680 That was unpleasant. 0.99
00:15:07.960 Unpleasant, I tell ye my true friends.
00:15:14.840 Now.
00:15:17.420 This will be epic. 1.00
00:15:23.520 Ah, fuck it. 1.00
00:15:29.780 Talos, I love you! 1.00
00:15:39.080 Hello, vampire, bro.
00:15:45.800 Okay, I should probably not even have blocked there.
00:15:49.080 Ah, look at that.
00:15:49.860 Because...
00:15:51.740 That gave me...
00:15:53.220 And it gave her more time to utilize her blasphemous magic on me. 1.00
00:16:00.740 Which, uh...
00:16:01.720 Which obviously wasn't good at all, was it?
00:16:06.440 Okay, I'm gonna stop caring about the hair now.
00:16:08.640 I suppose that...
00:16:10.200 That is only me...
00:16:11.520 That is caring about it.
00:16:14.020 That is only I... 1.00
00:16:15.140 Oh, fuck. 1.00
00:16:17.420 Bye! 1.00
00:16:19.320 You will actually have to come out and fight me here. 1.00
00:16:21.360 Come out, you black and tans. 1.00
00:16:24.460 Come out and fight me like a man. 0.99
00:16:27.120 Show your wife how you won medals down in Flanders.
00:16:31.920 Tell her how the IRA made you run like hell away.
00:16:37.740 That's some good old Irish rebel songs.
00:16:41.200 That's all...
00:16:43.240 Actually, also something I listen quite a bit to.
00:16:45.420 Irish rebel songs.
00:16:46.340 Still hungry.
00:16:47.960 What's that?
00:16:50.500 That's... 1.00
00:16:51.340 Ah, fuck. 1.00
00:16:56.760 I had almost forgotten... 1.00
00:16:58.460 That you can't...
00:17:00.680 Really...
00:17:01.460 Do shouts...
00:17:04.720 When you are crouched. 1.00
00:17:12.340 Fuck off, dog. 1.00
00:17:13.940 You insolent dog. 1.00
00:17:15.640 That actually is quite scary. 0.97
00:17:28.860 You know, they're coming... 0.99
00:17:29.860 They're coming fucking charging against you. 1.00
00:17:32.220 And... 1.00
00:17:32.740 Your shout doesn't work.
00:17:36.100 But...
00:17:36.740 It is what it is, man.
00:17:39.580 I'm gonna see if there's any...
00:17:41.640 No.
00:17:42.300 Not there.
00:17:42.760 Okay, then.
00:17:46.160 I'm here.
00:17:47.180 Come at me. 0.99
00:17:48.540 Fight me! 0.60
00:17:52.920 Talos, I love you!
00:18:03.200 How about that?
00:18:04.700 How about that?
00:18:07.600 Do you think she regrets...
00:18:09.740 Her blasphemous ways now? 1.00
00:18:11.560 I think she does. 0.99
00:18:12.480 I brought the Imperial fucking truth... 0.99
00:18:14.660 To her. 0.99
00:18:18.260 And...
00:18:18.900 What do we hear...
00:18:20.800 What do we have up ahead?
00:18:23.460 Was...
00:18:23.860 What I was gonna say.
00:18:25.460 Hello!
00:18:26.260 A chest. 1.00
00:18:27.940 Fucking poverty chest. 1.00
00:18:30.500 Son. 1.00
00:18:31.060 I'm disappointed.
00:18:31.760 What do we have to do?
00:18:32.760 There's something out of there.
00:18:34.960 There you are.
00:18:37.540 Huh.
00:18:39.080 Oh, that was actually...
00:18:41.140 Oh, they're fighting.
00:18:43.240 I had to have a cheat.
00:18:44.680 Fwah. 0.57
00:18:46.320 Vampire bra...
00:18:47.940 Got him good there.
00:18:49.620 That's exactly how it goes.
00:19:00.000 That's exactly how it goes.
00:19:00.060 No, you bloody well do not.
00:19:16.640 Come back here. 0.98
00:19:17.940 Come back here, you.
00:19:19.880 Yeah, horrendously bad play there at the start for me.
00:19:25.160 Just letting him...
00:19:27.200 Not getting in a single hit while I was in all actuality.
00:19:32.700 Oh, look at that.
00:19:33.840 Look at that, true friends.
00:19:35.680 That is beautiful.
00:19:37.360 Yeah, I didn't get the name.
00:19:39.880 Not a single hit when he was downed.
00:19:42.360 And that's something I would never do again. 1.00
00:19:47.520 Fuck, juicy. 1.00
00:19:48.420 I'll never tell you anything, vampire. 1.00
00:19:51.040 My oath to Stendhar is stronger than any suffering you can inflict on me.
00:19:56.940 I believe you, Vigil.
00:19:58.620 And I don't think you even know what you found here.
00:20:02.220 So go and meet your life, Stendhar.
00:20:04.140 Are you sure that was wise, Vigil?
00:20:07.360 He still might have told us something. 1.00
00:20:13.360 Fuck. 1.00
00:20:14.980 Come on, Vigil. 1.00
00:20:16.060 Fight me. 0.99
00:20:18.420 Vampire troll. 0.98
00:20:20.240 Ah, beautiful, Marcus. 0.98
00:20:21.760 Beautiful shot.
00:20:23.520 I am amazed by my performance.
00:20:34.140 I knew exactly what was going on there.
00:20:49.360 A decapitation.
00:20:51.400 How... 0.90
00:20:52.360 Wonderful.
00:20:55.800 Can't even find words to describe how glorious that execution was.
00:20:59.860 Ah, a chest.
00:21:03.920 Perhaps we can celebrate with some juicy loot.
00:21:08.520 No.
00:21:10.240 The juicy loot isn't for me, is it?
00:21:16.300 Ah, we're nearing the...
00:21:21.860 Amaret of Stendhar.
00:21:24.120 We are nearing...
00:21:34.840 Okay, cool.
00:21:35.980 It is actually...
00:21:37.220 In all actuality, it's a...
00:21:39.880 It's a puzzle.
00:21:42.300 Okay, bear with me.
00:22:03.680 As I...
00:22:04.680 As I do this...
00:22:16.680 This fun.
00:22:32.720 Sickening.
00:22:34.680 And we have this one.
00:22:48.880 And you as well.
00:22:49.720 Ah, how quaint.
00:23:05.980 How glorious.
00:23:08.520 Now.
00:23:11.120 Now.
00:23:11.600 Now.
00:23:12.160 Hello, hello.
00:23:22.400 I'm gonna adjust my games before I...
00:23:25.160 Where is...
00:23:26.360 Who sent you here?
00:23:29.060 Hello, gorgeous.
00:23:30.280 I was expecting someone...
00:23:31.960 Like me, at least.
00:23:36.400 Are you a... 0.56
00:23:37.920 Vampire? 0.82
00:23:39.020 Vampire.
00:23:40.160 Yes.
00:23:40.540 I can see that.
00:23:41.620 You're also gorgeous.
00:23:42.660 I like this girl.
00:23:43.620 I think she is beautiful. 1.00
00:23:45.280 Kill me if killed one vampire. 1.00
00:23:47.660 But if people are after me, there's something bigger going on. 1.00
00:23:50.420 Perhaps it's your father.
00:23:51.280 I can help you find out what that is.
00:23:54.760 Where do we need to go?
00:23:55.820 My family used to live on an island to the west of Solitude.
00:23:58.840 I would guess they still do.
00:24:00.960 By the way.
00:24:02.140 My name is Serana.
00:24:04.040 Serana.
00:24:04.360 That was her name.
00:24:06.720 Okay.
00:24:14.960 Your guess is as good as mine.
00:24:16.880 This place looks pretty different from when I was locked away.
00:24:19.360 Let us do it, fair maiden.
00:24:25.240 Yes, it is.
00:24:26.600 And it's mine.
00:24:28.760 May I look at it?
00:24:29.740 Okay, it's fine.
00:24:37.060 You don't.
00:24:37.520 I just saved you and all, but you know.
00:24:46.940 Well, um...
00:24:47.740 If that's alright.
00:24:48.360 What...
00:24:48.800 What actually are we supposed to do then? 1.00
00:24:51.920 You silly girl. 0.99
00:24:54.320 You can trust me, for God's sake. 1.00
00:24:56.220 And I'll have a better sense of where we all stand.
00:25:09.620 It's on an island near Solitude.
00:25:11.940 Hopefully we can find a boat to take us there.
00:25:14.660 It's my family home.
00:25:16.260 Not the most welcoming place, but...
00:25:18.860 Depending on who's around, I'll be safe there.
00:25:21.440 Let's just say that my mother and father had a bit of a falling out.
00:25:28.580 Don't worry, I'm not in any way.
00:25:29.700 Oh yeah, I think I remember her father was a crazy spark.
00:25:32.880 It would just be more unpleasant to run into my father. 0.99
00:25:36.500 Sick. 0.92
00:25:41.900 Good question. 0.91
00:25:43.460 Hard to say.
00:25:44.460 You're not very talkative, are you?
00:25:46.020 I can't really tell.
00:25:47.300 Okay, that's fine.
00:25:48.280 I feel like it was a long time.
00:25:49.760 It's fine.
00:25:50.040 Who is Skyrim's High King?
00:25:52.760 Jarl Ulfric!
00:25:57.700 El Sif of Solitude?
00:25:58.840 No, Ulfric Stormcloak is the true High King.
00:26:01.360 I've never heard of him.
00:26:02.940 Is he well supported?
00:26:04.020 My true friends and I support him at least.
00:26:06.700 Empire?
00:26:07.540 What...
00:26:07.860 What empire?
00:26:10.400 I suppose most of you true friends support Ulfric.
00:26:14.120 Cyrodiil is the seat of an empire?
00:26:15.820 It must have been gone longer than I thought.
00:26:18.140 Definitely longer than we planned.
00:26:20.960 Indeed.
00:26:21.340 Please, let's hurry.
00:26:22.300 I need to get home so I can't know what's happening. 0.95
00:26:24.280 Sure, we can go whenever you fucking want. 1.00
00:26:30.540 Women can be so silly sometimes. 1.00
00:26:33.300 Okay, cool. 1.00
00:26:33.940 She's actually with me. 1.00
00:26:38.180 Fuck. 1.00
00:26:38.700 Done and done. 1.00
00:27:03.040 Oh, look at that.
00:27:05.740 Ebony Garnet.
00:27:07.360 I can smith.
00:27:08.760 Spines with this later.
00:27:11.960 All right.
00:27:12.900 Come with me, fair maiden.
00:27:14.620 Come with me.
00:27:16.260 Ah.
00:27:16.700 Now then.
00:27:19.140 Iron Sword.
00:27:20.320 How do we escape this horrible place?
00:27:35.180 Fair maiden.
00:27:37.160 Ah, it's up there.
00:27:38.600 I found it.
00:27:40.740 I found it, true friends.
00:27:42.960 We are all...
00:27:44.280 We're all safe again.
00:27:45.320 You're safe with me.
00:27:50.240 You're safe with me.
00:27:59.280 Now.
00:28:00.700 Let us see where we actually are.
00:28:04.440 I bet my life that something or someone wants to box with me.
00:28:13.420 Here.
00:28:20.520 Hmm.
00:28:26.280 Hmm.
00:28:28.260 Could have been useful with some light.
00:28:30.500 Something in here, perhaps.
00:28:37.780 No.
00:28:38.360 Oh, there we are.
00:28:40.840 Sickening.
00:28:42.900 Come at me. 0.99
00:28:44.460 Come at me. 0.99
00:28:54.540 Oh, look at that.
00:28:55.720 A poverty skeleton.
00:28:57.760 You have been visited by the hungry skeletons.
00:29:00.500 All your gains will disappear unless you type greetings, skeleton.
00:29:08.300 No, it's fine.
00:29:10.180 I only do stuff like that on my Facebook.
00:29:13.580 Where I post a picture and then I promise gains.
00:29:18.700 Sickening.
00:29:19.720 Oh, look at that.
00:29:20.840 It's like an ancient lecture hall or like an arena.
00:29:25.980 Hello, mate.
00:29:28.000 Oh, that's actually a skeleton.
00:29:29.380 I thought it looked like a draugr. 1.00
00:29:36.420 You proud sons of Makedon.
00:29:41.060 Talos!
00:29:44.720 Come on then.
00:29:45.760 Fight me.
00:29:46.220 Oh.
00:29:53.440 Oh, God.
00:29:58.800 Where is my sword?
00:30:01.900 Oh, I can't believe this.
00:30:03.020 Where is...
00:30:03.480 Where is my sword?
00:30:06.000 True friends, please.
00:30:09.420 Why...
00:30:10.020 Why have this happened?
00:30:11.120 Oh, here it is.
00:30:14.180 Can I...
00:30:15.060 Can I equip it?
00:30:22.140 Draugr, White Lord. 0.99
00:30:23.440 Talos, I love you.
00:30:43.100 How dare you
00:30:54.980 Talk to me like that 0.98
00:30:57.060 Hello skeleton 0.99
00:30:58.920 I like to kill skeletons 0.99
00:31:02.980 Because they're so helpless 0.99
00:31:04.740 They can't really do anything against you
00:31:06.480 That's what I like here in life
00:31:08.760 Killing skeletons
00:31:09.800 Stamina 0.72
00:31:11.980 Okay
00:31:12.540 It's cool enough I suppose
00:31:15.700 Dun dun dun
00:31:26.160 To Skyrim
00:31:27.540 Sickening
00:31:33.380 Okay
00:31:35.220 Doesn't she look good though
00:31:41.920 With her red eyes and stuff 1.00
00:31:43.660 I think she looks good
00:31:45.080 Looks good actually
00:31:45.920 But that's just me
00:31:47.660 You can feel free to
00:31:49.640 To disagree if you want
00:31:52.280 I haven't discovered anything here
00:31:58.080 And not even Sol's time
00:32:00.160 Hmm
00:32:01.800 Oh well
00:32:03.320 Oh well
00:32:05.320 Oh well
00:32:06.420 Alright I utilized
00:32:11.400 A little edit there
00:32:14.340 So
00:32:14.900 So she didn't have to see me
00:32:17.680 Running across half of Skyrim
00:32:20.840 Skyrim
00:32:21.680 But yeah I took
00:32:22.480 But yeah I took
00:32:22.500 A carriage to Solitude
00:32:25.460 And then
00:32:26.000 Had a little cardio session
00:32:27.960 With
00:32:28.320 With Serana
00:32:30.620 So now we are
00:32:33.020 Actually here
00:32:33.680 Look at this beautiful weather
00:32:35.000 Always nice
00:32:35.880 So
00:32:36.880 So
00:32:37.880 The little ferryman
00:32:40.360 Is just behind her
00:32:42.340 And
00:32:43.540 We are going to meet her father
00:32:45.100 Trying to make a good impression
00:32:46.580 Hello
00:32:47.720 What is this place
00:32:52.080 That's privileged information
00:32:52.700 Now
00:32:53.240 Move along
00:32:53.980 Hmm
00:32:56.420 That's cool
00:32:57.180 Might be a fun place
00:32:59.380 To investigate
00:33:00.040 I bet it has something
00:33:01.260 To do with the Talmor
00:33:02.320 The
00:33:04.160 The blasphemous Talmor
00:33:06.160 They
00:33:06.500 They
00:33:08.560 They control
00:33:09.460 The media of Skyrim
00:33:11.840 No
00:33:12.560 But yeah 1.00
00:33:13.260 They have to be killed 1.00
00:33:14.100 Ice water jetty 1.00
00:33:16.640 Oh look at that
00:33:17.520 Fwa 0.99
00:33:18.140 That
00:33:19.140 True friends
00:33:19.760 Is 0.88
00:33:20.200 Is sickening
00:33:22.200 Indeed
00:33:22.560 Okay
00:33:23.300 Let's meet our father-in-law
00:33:25.340 Our new father-in-law
00:33:26.420 Our old one died
00:33:28.660 Fwa 0.99
00:33:30.000 This
00:33:30.760 Is 0.88
00:33:32.700 Sparta
00:33:34.460 No not Sparta
00:33:36.360 But
00:33:36.740 A vampire castle
00:33:38.880 Come on girl
00:33:42.320 God you're slow
00:33:44.280 You're not
00:33:46.740 Welcome
00:33:47.520 What do you mean
00:33:48.820 I'm not welcome
00:33:49.640 I just brought home
00:33:50.640 Your daughter
00:33:51.300 You should treat 1.00
00:33:51.840 Respectfully you cunt 1.00
00:33:53.020 Yeah 1.00
00:33:54.820 What up
00:33:56.560 What up girl
00:33:57.300 It's nothing
00:34:00.560 It's fine
00:34:01.300 I'm going to go
00:34:01.800 I'm going to go
00:34:01.820 My own way
00:34:02.400 For a while
00:34:02.960 Don't you dare
00:34:04.600 Leave me
00:34:05.400 Alone
00:34:05.740 In this place
00:34:06.800 Don't
00:34:07.500 Don't you dare
00:34:08.360 I'm hoping you can
00:34:09.640 Show some more
00:34:10.180 Control than that
00:34:11.160 Once we're in time
00:34:12.540 Yeah
00:34:12.800 I will
00:34:13.420 Because
00:34:13.800 They would probably
00:34:15.440 Wreck me
00:34:16.380 They would probably 0.84
00:34:18.420 Tear me a new one 0.68
00:34:19.580 If I started
00:34:21.220 Swinging about in there
00:34:23.320 Alright
00:34:24.280 Let us admire
00:34:25.380 This
00:34:25.780 This place
00:34:27.040 It is
00:34:29.280 So glorious
00:34:30.640 I suppose
00:34:31.580 How dare you
00:34:40.540 How dare you 0.98
00:34:42.740 Talk to me like that 1.00
00:34:43.860 Who the fuck are you 1.00
00:34:45.480 Yes 1.00
00:34:48.320 I brought her here 0.78
00:34:49.360 So you should show me 0.99
00:34:50.160 Some fucking respect 0.99
00:34:51.140 Look at this though 1.00
00:34:53.940 Shredded as fuck 1.00
00:34:55.820 Speak to Harkon 1.00
00:35:02.320 Hello mate
00:35:04.660 You want to have a go at me 1.00
00:35:06.100 What do you mean
00:35:08.480 You're busy
00:35:09.080 That's not a good father at all
00:35:20.180 He doesn't care
00:35:21.040 One bit
00:35:21.780 For his
00:35:22.480 Daughter
00:35:23.980 That's one aggressive
00:35:28.980 Dog
00:35:30.540 Traitor mother 1.00
00:35:31.440 Were here 0.99
00:35:32.160 I would let her watch
00:35:33.800 This reunion
00:35:34.680 Before putting her head 0.98
00:35:36.480 On a spike
00:35:37.540 Not a very loving husband
00:35:40.500 Either
00:35:40.800 Apparently
00:35:41.240 I'm her boyfriend
00:35:46.700 For my daughter's safe return
00:35:50.700 You have my gratitude
00:35:52.260 Tell me
00:35:53.600 What is your name
00:35:54.960 Golden one 1.00
00:35:56.620 Who the fuck are you 1.00
00:35:58.440 Lord of this court 1.00
00:36:01.060 I can see quite well enough
00:36:07.920 I can see quite a few 0.90
00:36:09.900 With your vampire
00:36:10.220 Not just vampires
00:36:10.700 Vampires
00:36:11.440 We are among the oldest
00:36:12.920 And most powerful vampires
00:36:14.940 In Skyrim
00:36:16.120 For centuries we lived here
00:36:18.800 Far from the cares of the world
00:36:21.020 All that ended
00:36:22.780 When my wife betrayed me
00:36:24.500 And stole away
00:36:25.520 That which I valued most
00:36:27.460 The Elder Scroll
00:36:28.380 I don't want to be a vampire
00:36:43.680 Not with this character
00:36:45.080 At least
00:36:45.520 I kind of already do that
00:36:51.700 They do that as well
00:36:54.320 Okay
00:36:57.060 And if I refuse your gift
00:36:59.120 Then you will be prey
00:37:00.120 Like all mortals 0.96
00:37:01.800 I will spare your life this once 0.86
00:37:04.300 But you will be banished 0.94
00:37:05.460 From this hall
00:37:06.460 Perhaps you still need convincing
00:37:09.340 Behold the power
00:37:11.780 This is the power
00:37:16.860 That I offer
00:37:18.340 Now
00:37:19.040 Make your choice 0.82
00:37:21.240 With sick physique
00:37:23.080 He actually
00:37:23.700 No
00:37:24.760 So be it
00:37:27.560 I don't
00:37:28.560 Can you accept that
00:37:30.000 You are prey
00:37:30.320 Like all mortals 1.00
00:37:31.820 I banish you
00:37:34.240 And thus
00:37:39.460 The first dinner
00:37:41.000 With my father-in-law
00:37:42.140 Was concluded
00:37:44.500 Okay
00:37:51.180 I'm coming to my senses
00:37:52.420 All right
00:37:55.100 That will have to conclude
00:37:57.440 This glorious episode
00:37:58.720 I hope you're all
00:37:59.880 As excited
00:38:00.700 As I am
00:38:01.480 To commence
00:38:02.400 This epic
00:38:03.260 Quest line
00:38:05.240 With the vampires
00:38:06.100 So
00:38:07.280 Thank you so much
00:38:08.280 For watching
00:38:08.840 And who am I
00:38:11.640 I'm Talos
00:38:14.140 XXO
00:38:15.360 Boom
00:38:15.980 I'm
00:38:18.200 Jim
00:38:19.580 What's
00:38:21.260 A
00:38:21.440 go
00:38:21.860 In
00:38:22.840 I'm
00:38:23.960 Van
00:38:24.920 Was
00:38:25.160 You
00:38:25.780 In
00:38:26.320 A
00:38:27.200 One
00:38:27.320 Of
00:38:28.040 As
00:38:28.760 Who
00:38:29.200 What's
00:38:30.140 Like
00:38:30.500 What is
00:38:31.120 A
00:38:33.060 What is
00:38:33.300 Like
00:38:33.540 Is 0.88
00:38:34.240 Like
00:38:34.540 One
00:38:35.380 What is
00:38:35.920 What is
00:38:36.740 A
00:38:37.840 To
00:38:37.860 To
00:38:38.600 It
00:38:39.600 Is 0.88
00:38:40.560 Why