The Joe Rogan Experience - September 14, 2017


Joe Rogan Experience #1011 - Tom Papa

Topics
cigars rolling joints rolling weed rituals crazy people fighting dynamics in relationships tribalism inside civilization bidet fatberg discovery tree in toilet pipe nature vs. civilization five-finger shoes trail running sweating in yoga class pot pie choking in jiu-jitsu growing wheat for bread heat wave and modern conveniences drugs and creativity hunting and conservation hunting and wildlife management coyote genetics black bears anthropomorphization effects chickens distemper symptoms in dogs
Hosted by
Joe Rogan
Guests
Tom Papa
Mentioned
Harry Jamie Vernon Stephen King Cujo Tom Papa John A. Macdonald Hillary Clinton Jesus Christ Madonna Carrie Jack Nicholson Mark Sisson Dude Sweet Duncan Guy Ritchie Muay Thai Yogi Bear McGregor Bitcoin Ibiza and 75 more
Joe Rogan Experience #1010 - Brian Redban Joe Rogan Experience #1012 - Brendan Schaub

Episode Stats


Length

3 hours and 19 minutes

Words per minute

194.31

Word count

38,764

Sentence count

5,367

Harmful content

Misogyny

125

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1,064

sentences flagged

Hate speech

73

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

This week, the boys talk about cigars, Bitcoin, and the people who make them. They also discuss the current events in the world, including Bitcoin's halving in value and the current state of the stock market. And, of course, there's a new segment called "The Cigar Guy" where the boys try to figure out who's making the most money out of cigars and who's getting the most out of them. And, as always, we have our Hot Water, FMK, and FMK's of the week, and we're joined by special guest, comedian and friend of the show, Joe Pesci. Enjoy, and tweet us what you thought of this episode! Timestamps: 4:00 - Cigars and Bitcoin 6:30 - Who makes the best cigars? 7:20 - How much money does it take to make a good cigar? 8:40 - What's the difference between a good and bad cigar 9:15 - What does it mean to be a man of cigars 10:00 - Who is making the best cigar 11:30 - What do you think of the cigar industry? 12:15 13:20 14:40 15:00 | Cigar companies? 16:30 | Cigars? 17:40 | Who makes them? 18:00 // Cigar company? 19: How much are they getting paid? 21:20 | Who are they making these things? 22: Who makes a good life? 23:00 / 22: What do they make the most of it? 25:00: What kind of cigars do they roll? 26: What are they make? 27:30 // Is it a good day? 29:00/30: What is the value of a good night? 32:30/33: Is it hard to make the best thing? 35:30 / 32:50/35:00 & 35:00 +40:00 Can they make it better than a good time? 36:00 Is there a better way to make money in the best place to live in New York City? 37:30 + 35:40: Is Bitcoin worth $20,000? 39:00 How much do they get paid in a good place? 45:00 Are they making a good deal? 47:00 Do they make a better gig?

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 We're going to go live.
00:00:00.000 Five, four, three, two, one.
00:00:05.000 Tom Papa is obviously some sort of a nicotine junkie.
00:00:09.000 He's using a knife made out of a nail to scratch open the box so he can get at these cigars.
00:00:15.000 I feel like Ben Franklin used this knife to open up wine once.
00:00:18.000 Well, no, that's from the Pygmies. 0.96
00:00:20.000 Oh, really?
00:00:21.000 Yeah, they made it for me.
00:00:22.000 Look at their little handle.
00:00:24.000 My good friend Justin Wren, who's been on the podcast a few times, he's this amazing guy that makes wells for the Pygmies.
00:00:32.000 He was a former UFC fighter, now he fights for Bellator.
00:00:36.000 He's in their heavyweight division, this big teddy bear of a guy. 0.94
00:00:39.000 The fucking nicest guy you'll ever want to meet. 0.95
00:00:41.000 And he goes to the Congo and builds wells, and we've helped him out. 0.97
00:00:47.000 Got some people that donate Bitcoin, which, by the way, is worth more money now.
00:00:51.000 So what I'm gonna do is take whatever it's worth now and just give it to the Congo people. 1.00
00:00:57.000 We gotta wait this week.
00:00:58.000 I gotta wait?
00:00:59.000 J.P. Morgan guy screwed it up. 0.78
00:01:01.000 He fucked up the Bitcoin. 0.94
00:01:02.000 I don't understand the Bitcoin. 0.97
00:01:03.000 I can just make it go up and down fast.
00:01:05.000 Um, ooh, how's it look?
00:01:06.000 They look good, huh?
00:01:07.000 Ooh, look at that.
00:01:07.000 These cigars.
00:01:08.000 It's beautiful.
00:01:09.000 They look luscious.
00:01:10.000 How many people...
00:01:12.000 This is what you offered somebody right before you screw them.
00:01:15.000 Joe, have a cigar.
00:01:16.000 But isn't this strange?
00:01:17.000 Stop and think about this.
00:01:19.000 Yeah.
00:01:20.000 When you are buying a cigar, like, let's think about the kind of people that you think of smoking cigars.
00:01:24.000 I think of, like, a Jay-Z type character on a yacht, right?
00:01:27.000 Yeah.
00:01:28.000 Just looking out over the beautiful ocean going, I did it. 0.98
00:01:32.000 I fucking did it. 0.97
00:01:33.000 I mean, there's no denying I'm here. 0.99
00:01:35.000 Yeah.
00:01:35.000 You know, Jay-Z's got a fat...
00:01:37.000 Gold rope around his neck, right?
00:01:39.000 And he's puffed on a cigar.
00:01:41.000 Drinking some champagne.
00:01:42.000 Yeah.
00:01:43.000 Or maybe a nice martini or something.
00:01:45.000 Like a gentleman. 1.00
00:01:46.000 And sitting there just going, what the fuck? 1.00
00:01:48.000 This doesn't get any better. 1.00
00:01:49.000 This is it.
00:01:50.000 I did it.
00:01:50.000 Yeah, there it is.
00:01:51.000 Human Beyonce.
00:01:53.000 I mean, he's not a man of cigar.
00:01:56.000 Absolutely. 0.99
00:01:56.000 He fucking wins. 0.99
00:01:58.000 He wins so hard. 1.00
00:02:00.000 And that's the beauty of the cigar. 0.97
00:02:02.000 You could be in your little crappy yard smoking a cigar. 0.98
00:02:05.000 You feel like that. 0.99
00:02:06.000 But here's my thought.
00:02:08.000 When we associate the cigar with that guy, think about who makes a cigar.
00:02:13.000 You're talking about people who live in tiny villages that get paid almost nothing, that are rolling these things together.
00:02:19.000 God bless them.
00:02:20.000 How much are they getting paid?
00:02:21.000 I mean, I know there's some places in Miami where you can actually go and you can actually watch them make cigars.
00:02:27.000 They'll roll up cigars.
00:02:28.000 It's pretty badass.
00:02:29.000 Impressive.
00:02:32.000 Like, who is profiting from this?
00:02:36.000 Yeah, whoever owns the big giant tobacco company.
00:02:40.000 Right, but they need those people that roll those things. 0.99
00:02:43.000 Yeah, you do.
00:02:44.000 But, you know, the little guy who's rolling the things, he's, you know, just making a little living doing his little thing.
00:02:50.000 He can't build the whole tobacco company.
00:02:53.000 This is corporate Tom Tom.
00:02:54.000 Yeah.
00:02:55.000 What it's essentially like.
00:03:01.000 Yeah.
00:03:03.000 Yeah.
00:03:19.000 Yes and no.
00:03:21.000 Because in New York, as you remember, there was a big riot.
00:03:26.000 Everyone was like, these clubs are paying us 20 bucks a spot.
00:03:30.000 They've been paying us that forever. 0.70
00:03:32.000 Screw them.
00:03:33.000 They make money.
00:03:34.000 And I had a hard time with it because...
00:03:39.000 I felt like what they're giving us in a place to go and do stand-up every night and have an audience there, the value I was getting for my act was so much more valuable than the $20 I was getting paid.
00:03:53.000 I didn't care about the $20.
00:03:55.000 I wanted them to give me a place where I could go work on my act and then take that To some other city or some other bigger gig, and that's where I would make my money.
00:04:04.000 So you know what I mean?
00:04:04.000 It wasn't purely like, screw the man.
00:04:08.000 The man's giving me a comedy club and has run this place for 30 years, so I can roll in on a Wednesday.
00:04:14.000 And have 200 people there.
00:04:16.000 Well, there's certainly, I think, a different feel that you have for places that are...
00:04:21.000 Say if you were an Ice House comedian, you essentially have a partnership with the Ice House.
00:04:28.000 I feel like I have a bit of a partnership with the Ice House.
00:04:31.000 Yes.
00:04:31.000 Well, you do.
00:04:32.000 You sell it out.
00:04:34.000 Yeah, and I love that place, and I love Bob, the guy who owns it.
00:04:37.000 And I don't mean a partnership like I have an ownership in it, but I feel like there's...
00:04:41.000 I have a bit of an obligation, I think we all do, to perform at the great clubs.
00:04:46.000 Just to keep them floating, and to keep everybody happy, because you can, and because it's good for you, and it's good for me, and it's good for everybody.
00:04:55.000 Instead of a partnership, maybe that's not the best word, but there's some sort of...
00:05:01.000 It's an inexorable relationship.
00:05:03.000 You cannot separate them.
00:05:04.000 For sure.
00:05:05.000 Like, there's some cities, you know, like Hilarity's in Cleveland, right?
00:05:09.000 I love that club.
00:05:10.000 Amazing.
00:05:10.000 I love the owner.
00:05:11.000 Amazing place.
00:05:11.000 Nick's the greatest guy.
00:05:13.000 Great food, too.
00:05:13.000 They're also, they're like family.
00:05:15.000 Good people.
00:05:16.000 It literally is great people.
00:05:17.000 I have no interest of going to Cleveland and playing a theater.
00:05:21.000 Because if everybody comes up and jumps on Nick, then I'd rather draw, spend a couple days, I'll make the same money, pretty much.
00:05:32.000 That is a relationship.
00:05:33.000 We've had a relationship throughout the years.
00:05:35.000 For me to jump seems weird.
00:05:37.000 It does.
00:05:38.000 But there's some other places that you don't feel like that.
00:05:43.000 Also, your thing with the Ice House, it's like, you say you're playing the Ice House.
00:05:48.000 Now, and by tonight, it's sold out.
00:05:51.000 Before tonight.
00:05:52.000 And he's got a really good business going there.
00:05:55.000 Well, it's also, I've been able to get guys like you in there on stage, and Burr comes in a lot now.
00:06:00.000 It's like, you get people to realize, this is an amazing place to practice.
00:06:04.000 And the people are so cool.
00:06:06.000 The best.
00:06:07.000 There's a difference in, like, the feel of the audience.
00:06:11.000 Like, L.A., it's like, wow, we're at the Comedy Store.
00:06:14.000 Can't believe it.
00:06:15.000 We're in Ice House.
00:06:15.000 It's like, wow, we're out to see a show.
00:06:17.000 It's like, there really is.
00:06:19.000 There's a different feel to it all.
00:06:20.000 Totally different.
00:06:21.000 Yeah, you feel like you're almost a little on the road.
00:06:23.000 Almost on the road, yeah.
00:06:24.000 You know what's like that, too?
00:06:25.000 Oxnard.
00:06:26.000 Oxnard?
00:06:27.000 Have you ever done that place?
00:06:28.000 No.
00:06:28.000 Oh, the new Levity?
00:06:29.000 No, no, no. 1.00
00:06:30.000 Fucking amazing club! 1.00
00:06:31.000 And now we're outside of LA and you're on the road. 1.00
00:06:33.000 Uh, Comedy Magic, same kind of thing.
00:06:35.000 Same thing.
00:06:36.000 You know?
00:06:36.000 Any place where when you wake up in the morning, you're like, oh, I gotta drive there.
00:06:40.000 Then you know you're a little on the road.
00:06:43.000 But you know those gigs, man? 0.96
00:06:44.000 They're so fucking important. 0.97
00:06:46.000 Because you have to have those shitty gigs to appreciate the nice ones. 0.98
00:06:49.000 Oh, absolutely. 0.64
00:06:50.000 Every gig is good.
00:06:51.000 Yeah.
00:06:52.000 Even the worst ones.
00:06:53.000 But back to your cigar thing.
00:06:56.000 You know, there are these little workers that are probably making $2 a day. 1.00
00:07:00.000 That's the point.
00:07:01.000 Rolling the stuff.
00:07:02.000 I mean, I'm just guessing.
00:07:03.000 I don't really know.
00:07:03.000 Maybe we're dead off, and maybe these people are like highly compensated, skilled labor.
00:07:08.000 Well, it's probably layers of it.
00:07:10.000 There's probably a guy who's really good at it, you know, who runs everybody who's been there for 30 years.
00:07:14.000 Yes, they are. 1.00
00:07:15.000 Watch him roll, and this motherfucker could just whoosh. 0.99
00:07:18.000 Like, you know dudes who could just roll joints? 1.00
00:07:20.000 Yeah.
00:07:21.000 You ever meet those guys?
00:07:22.000 Oh, so impressive.
00:07:22.000 Like a cigarette.
00:07:23.000 They'd slide it out their mouth.
00:07:25.000 I have no skill. 1.00
00:07:26.000 I am a fucking ape-fingered retard when it comes to rolling joints. 1.00
00:07:30.000 I used to be good at it. 1.00
00:07:32.000 But I watch some people, like Tony Hinchcliffe can roll a fucking fat joint. 0.99
00:07:35.000 Really? 1.00
00:07:35.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:07:36.000 Jamie Vernon rolls a goddamn good joint. 0.99
00:07:40.000 I used to be good at it. 0.99
00:07:41.000 You know what the problem with me, man?
00:07:42.000 I got one of those roller things.
00:07:44.000 Those little...
00:07:44.000 A little roll machine?
00:07:46.000 With the fingers.
00:07:47.000 The best ones are with the fingers.
00:07:48.000 There's one I have that you could go like that.
00:07:51.000 You put the rolling paper in, you put the weed in, and then you lick the paper, and then you just go like that.
00:07:57.000 Boom, boom, and it does it all by itself.
00:08:00.000 Yeah, it rolls it up.
00:08:00.000 It's so advanced.
00:08:01.000 Yeah.
00:08:02.000 It's so good.
00:08:04.000 I'm like, I'm not rolling this by hand. 1.00
00:08:06.000 What am I, an asshole? 1.00
00:08:07.000 When you're smoking by yourself? 1.00
00:08:08.000 Start a fire with sticks and shit. 1.00
00:08:10.000 When you're by yourself, do you roll? 1.00
00:08:12.000 Or do you just take like a one hit?
00:08:13.000 I buy them already rolled.
00:08:14.000 Oh, you buy them already rolled.
00:08:16.000 From LA Speedweed for all your delivery services.
00:08:19.000 That's very nice.
00:08:19.000 When you buy them already rolled, like, you don't have to think about it.
00:08:22.000 I don't want to think about shit. 1.00
00:08:24.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:08:24.000 But some people love the ritual. 1.00
00:08:25.000 But the ritual of that.
00:08:27.000 I used to love the...
00:08:28.000 Do you do it on an album?
00:08:29.000 I used to when they had albums.
00:08:32.000 What has replaced the album for rolling weed on?
00:08:35.000 And then it went to CD cover.
00:08:37.000 You would do it on a CD cover.
00:08:38.000 Some people use those actual weed theme trays.
00:08:42.000 That seems kind of corny to me.
00:08:43.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:08:44.000 I feel like you should steal some shit from a cafeteria. 1.00
00:08:47.000 Right? 0.99
00:08:48.000 Have like a Pirates of the Caribbean ornate little tray.
00:08:52.000 You know what you should have, man?
00:08:54.000 You should get one of them aluminum ones from prison.
00:08:57.000 Because you're in a prison of your own mind, man.
00:09:02.000 That would be actually kind of badass.
00:09:04.000 A real, like, standard issue aluminum prison tray for weed.
00:09:10.000 Comes with fake mashed potatoes.
00:09:11.000 You're in a prison of your own mind, man.
00:09:14.000 Man, you gotta free your mind.
00:09:15.000 Do you have a cutter?
00:09:16.000 I do not.
00:09:17.000 Oh yeah, I do.
00:09:18.000 I can chew it off.
00:09:19.000 When I think about the cigar, though, I don't think of Jay-Z so much as, like, it's a wonderful life.
00:09:26.000 Like the banker in It's a Wonderful Life. 0.98
00:09:28.000 We had a box with a cutter in it and some other bullshit. 0.98
00:09:30.000 Did I bring that in? 0.99
00:09:31.000 I could bite it off.
00:09:32.000 Is that over there?
00:09:34.000 If you bite it off I feel like it's one of those things.
00:09:38.000 When I started Out of school, I worked in advertising for a little while, and I used to go to this nursing home.
00:09:44.000 It was small advertising.
00:09:47.000 And we would go to a nursing home, and we would do all the ad campaign for this guy who owned like five nursing homes.
00:09:53.000 He was a really rich guy.
00:09:54.000 And he looked a little like a frog.
00:09:56.000 He was like an older guy.
00:09:57.000 He came up in the war, and he used to, you know, first he started with trucks.
00:10:00.000 Now he owns nursing homes.
00:10:02.000 And he was just like an old school guy, big glasses.
00:10:04.000 And he always had a cigar.
00:10:06.000 All day long, he'd walk around with a cigar in his mouth, just chomping on it, not lit.
00:10:09.000 He would just chomp it, chomp it, chomp it, and it would be kind of scuzzy at the end.
00:10:14.000 But then eventually, no cutter, at the end, he'd been chewing it so long, he'd just spit it out and then light it up.
00:10:21.000 Hmm.
00:10:22.000 Yeah. 0.85
00:10:23.000 What a weirdo.
00:10:26.000 Don't worry about it, Jamie.
00:10:27.000 It might be in the other room.
00:10:28.000 I can bite it off.
00:10:29.000 Don't worry about it.
00:10:29.000 I feel like it's in the kitchen.
00:10:30.000 I'm doing it already.
00:10:32.000 Yeah, we'll just bite it off.
00:10:33.000 Just go old school.
00:10:34.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:10:35.000 Old school, bugsy, shingle type.
00:10:37.000 We do feel like a big shot with a cigar.
00:10:39.000 Why is that?
00:10:41.000 I don't know.
00:10:42.000 In a box?
00:10:43.000 Why do you feel like a big shot?
00:10:45.000 I don't know.
00:10:45.000 I feel gross spitting it out, too.
00:10:47.000 I know.
00:10:47.000 Here's a tissue.
00:10:48.000 Getting the weed in there, son.
00:10:54.000 Yeah, but Jamie, can we find out whether or not cigar rollers are abused and underpaid?
00:11:03.000 The cigar industry is going to be pissed at us now.
00:11:05.000 I'm sure.
00:11:07.000 It's a weird thing, right?
00:11:08.000 It's like a cigar is like a thing.
00:11:10.000 It's affluent.
00:11:11.000 Right, but it's also like a guy thing or a chick who can hang thing. 0.99
00:11:17.000 Bro, she smokes cigars.
00:11:19.000 I mean, come on.
00:11:21.000 You know, you see a girl with like an open blouse, like wearing glasses, like smoking a cigar with like a baseball hat on. 0.99
00:11:28.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:11:28.000 Like a fucking Dodgers hat on. 1.00
00:11:30.000 Yeah, screaming facts about the Broncos. 1.00
00:11:33.000 Yeah, with like those cheerleader type socks.
00:11:35.000 Go all the way up to her knees, no shoes on. 0.99
00:11:38.000 That girl's fun to hang with one night, but you don't want that girl for the long haul. 0.98
00:11:42.000 Well, she's a sprinter. 1.00
00:11:45.000 Right.
00:11:45.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:11:47.000 You want to date a marathon runner.
00:11:49.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:11:50.000 You want to date an ultra-marathon runner.
00:11:51.000 Someone who's just slow and steady, and they just keep that pace, and they will not quit.
00:11:55.000 Yeah.
00:11:59.000 Arms in tight, just going, little steps.
00:12:01.000 A chick with no underwear on and sweat socks with your shirt on, and she's smoking a cigar, like, okay. 1.00
00:12:08.000 Yeah, alright, you're not coming to Thanksgiving.
00:12:10.000 This is, I don't think this is going to make it.
00:12:13.000 This one's not going to make it.
00:12:14.000 This one's going to be fun for a little while.
00:12:15.000 But it's like a rollercoaster.
00:12:17.000 Would you want to ride a rollercoaster eight hours a day for the rest of your life?
00:12:21.000 Exactly.
00:12:22.000 You eat nauseous all the time. 0.66
00:12:24.000 Yeah, I mean, that's the function that crazy people have in your life.
00:12:26.000 They're valuable, but you don't want to be around them constantly.
00:12:29.000 No, a hell of a lot of fun.
00:12:31.000 They're exhausting.
00:12:31.000 No, you pack up the car and go visit once in a while and that's it.
00:12:35.000 Yeah, crazy people are exhausting, man.
00:12:38.000 Totally exhausting. 0.76
00:12:40.000 I went with this crazy girl once, and it went on longer than it should.
00:12:45.000 And she was intensely fun. 0.85
00:12:47.000 I mean, crazy, just, you know, insane.
00:12:51.000 Everything about her was fun and insane.
00:12:52.000 And I stayed in too long.
00:12:54.000 And by the end of it...
00:12:56.000 I was like, you just gotta go.
00:12:58.000 I was almost in tears.
00:12:59.000 I was like, you gotta get out of here.
00:13:01.000 I can't live like this.
00:13:04.000 Because it wasn't just the crazy fun drama.
00:13:06.000 It was like, they directed at you at a certain point, and they wanted to put the crazy on you and analyze and fight and do all that stuff.
00:13:13.000 Some people definitely want to fight.
00:13:14.000 I can't live with fight.
00:13:16.000 I'm not a fighter.
00:13:17.000 I'm not either.
00:13:17.000 Some people think that's how a relationship's supposed to be.
00:13:21.000 If you're not fighting, somehow or another you don't care about each other.
00:13:25.000 Because if you care, you get upset.
00:13:27.000 It's a very weird sort of dynamic, the man-woman relationship dynamic of things that people think you should and shouldn't expect.
00:13:34.000 Right.
00:13:34.000 The way people behave or don't behave, the way they talk to you or don't talk to you.
00:13:38.000 Yeah.
00:13:38.000 It's weird.
00:13:40.000 As if it's all the same, too.
00:13:41.000 Any friendship is the same.
00:13:43.000 Don't let people be mean to you. 1.00
00:13:45.000 Don't let them fucking beat you down, yell shit at you. 1.00
00:13:49.000 But some people, if you grow up in a home that fights all the time, you get used to that, and then it's not a big deal. 1.00
00:13:55.000 This girl would fight, scream, and yell, and as soon as it was done, She'd be fine.
00:14:02.000 Just, like, have some coffee and just, like, sit there.
00:14:04.000 And I'd be shaking, like, oh my god, why did she say that?
00:14:08.000 Oh my god.
00:14:09.000 Like, I am not good with that kind of tension.
00:14:12.000 Not at all.
00:14:13.000 Yeah, I used to date this girl would get really mad, really mad and want to fight. 1.00
00:14:17.000 And then once there was some sort of resolution, she would immediately turn docile.
00:14:24.000 It was very odd.
00:14:26.000 She'd be aggressive to like start some sort of altercation, but you could calm the altercation down. 1.00
00:14:32.000 You could shut it down.
00:14:33.000 Yeah.
00:14:33.000 But you had to almost shut it down.
00:14:36.000 By just saying, you're not going to do this.
00:14:38.000 I'm not going to talk like this.
00:14:39.000 Like a child.
00:14:40.000 Yeah, and I was young, so I needed to learn how to talk to people.
00:14:43.000 Right.
00:14:44.000 Or how to manage situations.
00:14:46.000 Sometimes something's happening between two people, like you're upset about something, and instead of thinking about how you're conveying your thought to them, all you think of is what you want to happen.
00:15:00.000 Right. 1.00
00:15:00.000 I want you to shut the fuck up. 1.00
00:15:02.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:15:06.000 Even though you want someone to shut the fuck up, the problem is when you say that, you're not really thinking about communicating with them through their eyes. 0.99
00:15:15.000 Nobody wants anyone to say, shut the fuck up, but we say it because we want people to shut the fuck up. 0.99
00:15:21.000 And you can't deal with it. 0.99
00:15:23.000 At a certain point, you don't care what their needs are.
00:15:27.000 You just want them to stop.
00:15:29.000 Well, it's also like when people want people to do things, or they want people...
00:15:34.000 There's like, the mindset of you wanting a result.
00:15:37.000 You want someone to behave a certain way.
00:15:39.000 Instead of thinking about them as like, you're equal, like just another human being.
00:15:46.000 And instead of thinking like, I have to get what I want.
00:15:49.000 Like, what is it that you want?
00:15:51.000 What happened here?
00:15:53.000 Like, why are we at this pass?
00:15:55.000 I find like, getting older, that thing I'm more aware of.
00:16:01.000 It's that big part of not thinking about you all the time.
00:16:06.000 You're always thinking, especially when you're young and you're coming up and it's just me, me, me, me, because you're just trying to survive, you're trying to figure, you don't even know what you want.
00:16:13.000 When you shut that part down and think about the person across from you, it opens up the whole world.
00:16:21.000 But it's a difficult thing to learn, especially when you're young.
00:16:25.000 It's also contradictory to success, like you think, but not.
00:16:31.000 If you don't think about yourself, no one will.
00:16:34.000 There's that kind of thought process. 1.00
00:16:35.000 Just get really good at shit. 1.00
00:16:39.000 Here's the ironic thing. 1.00
00:16:40.000 One of the best ways to get really good at shit is shutting that voice down. 0.99
00:16:45.000 Especially anything creative. 1.00
00:16:47.000 That voice like, me, me, me.
00:16:48.000 I want this and I want that.
00:16:49.000 I want people to listen to me.
00:16:52.000 Shut that thing down. 1.00
00:16:53.000 The more you can shut that thing down and the more whatever you do, you concentrate on it.
00:16:59.000 Going to work.
00:17:00.000 And nobody does it perfect.
00:17:01.000 Nobody does it perfect.
00:17:02.000 Well, it's not only that they don't do it perfect, it's that you have to constantly...
00:17:07.000 Re-teach yourself that.
00:17:08.000 You have to constantly bring yourself back.
00:17:11.000 That's huge.
00:17:11.000 Bring yourself back.
00:17:13.000 It's a trick.
00:17:14.000 It's an ongoing exercise.
00:17:17.000 It really is.
00:17:17.000 And that's why it's like, I was watching this interview with Nate Diaz, UFC fighter.
00:17:23.000 He's hilarious.
00:17:24.000 And Nate was talking about watching himself on The Ultimate Fighter from 10 years ago. 1.00
00:17:28.000 And he's like, please shut that shit off. 1.00
00:17:30.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:17:30.000 He goes, anybody watch a video of yourself from 10 years ago? 1.00
00:17:35.000 And you'd be like, shut that shit up. 1.00
00:17:37.000 And I was thinking, he's so right. 1.00
00:17:39.000 That's such an obvious thing.
00:17:41.000 Nobody likes to see themselves from a long time ago because we're all a work in progress.
00:17:47.000 But when you were in that moment, when that video was taken of you, you thought you had it going on.
00:17:52.000 You thought you were doing it, right?
00:17:54.000 Yeah.
00:17:54.000 Yeah, for sure.
00:17:55.000 I mean, right now, we think we're in the moment like we're doing fine, but if you were to look back at this, there'd be something wrong.
00:18:01.000 I'm upset that this cigar has two bands.
00:18:03.000 I feel like...
00:18:04.000 I took the first band off immediately. 1.00
00:18:06.000 I feel like this cigar can go fuck itself because of that. 0.99
00:18:07.000 It's too fancy. 1.00
00:18:08.000 This is outrageous.
00:18:09.000 I am really enjoying it, though.
00:18:10.000 You don't need two bands. 0.99
00:18:10.000 How about you take the money from one of these bands and pay those dudes to roll this motherfucker? 0.99
00:18:15.000 You're such a socialist. 0.99
00:18:17.000 I'm turning commie as I get old.
00:18:19.000 Something's happening.
00:18:20.000 Are you?
00:18:20.000 I'm shifting.
00:18:21.000 Are you shifting?
00:18:22.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:18:22.000 You know what I shift towards lately more than anything is like kindness to our fellow humans.
00:18:28.000 That is the exact word I have been using all month.
00:18:33.000 Act out of kindness.
00:18:35.000 Politicians, people, grocers, my family.
00:18:39.000 Just be kind.
00:18:41.000 Just be kind.
00:18:42.000 Yeah, and I think the more we recognize that, the more we see evidence of that, even in groups or chunks of people that share our mindset on other things.
00:18:55.000 And we don't want to call it.
00:18:56.000 We don't want to call them out on it.
00:18:58.000 Right.
00:18:58.000 Like, say, if you're a Republican and there's, like, some Republican candidate or something that's running for president, but they're really shady in one way or they're corrupt or whatever.
00:19:08.000 And, you know, you don't want to talk about it because it's a part of your party.
00:19:10.000 Yeah.
00:19:11.000 Right?
00:19:11.000 That's insane.
00:19:12.000 You can't, yeah. 1.00
00:19:15.000 Tribalism inside our own civilization is fucking bananas. 0.98
00:19:19.000 I feel like that's the most disturbing thing of all the discourse now, is that people are so entrenched in these teams. 1.00
00:19:28.000 You're a sucker if you're that in on any of these teams. 0.90
00:19:31.000 No team is... 1.00
00:19:33.000 You've got to flow.
00:19:34.000 Do you think that's because people are scared and so they feel more comfort in being a part of some rigid team?
00:19:42.000 That's what I see in a lot of these white supremacists.
00:19:45.000 I see fear.
00:19:47.000 These guys are walking and they're holding these torches and they're yelling things.
00:19:51.000 I see fear.
00:19:53.000 I really do.
00:19:54.000 It's a big part of what it is.
00:19:56.000 Yeah, they're coming for me.
00:19:57.000 They're coming for us.
00:19:58.000 They're pushing us out.
00:20:00.000 We're supposed to all be the same thing.
00:20:01.000 We look different.
00:20:02.000 Jesus Christ, that's it?
00:20:04.000 And all the other differences that we have, like left and right and ideologies.
00:20:09.000 How can you be all in on any political organization?
00:20:16.000 It's blind faith.
00:20:18.000 It's just like...
00:20:19.000 What's that?
00:20:19.000 I'm all in on weed.
00:20:21.000 Well, alright.
00:20:21.000 Team weed you can go for.
00:20:23.000 I'll go team cigar.
00:20:24.000 How can you?
00:20:24.000 I really don't understand it.
00:20:26.000 Like, you really have...
00:20:27.000 And what's really upsetting about it is it goes completely against what we're talking about of listening to the other person.
00:20:33.000 Like, really listening to them.
00:20:35.000 There's a guy on my block...
00:20:38.000 Older guy.
00:20:39.000 He's retired.
00:20:40.000 He's got his little dog.
00:20:41.000 He walks his little dog every day.
00:20:43.000 And he always, hey, you know, we've only been there a couple years.
00:20:46.000 Good morning, Tom.
00:20:47.000 Good morning, Bob.
00:20:48.000 And he just walks with his dog and he's just like this nice, he's the guy from, he's in my movie of my life.
00:20:53.000 He's the extra that walks the guy.
00:20:54.000 Right.
00:20:55.000 My wife saw that he had a Trump poster in his garage, and my wife was all in on Hillary. 1.00
00:21:04.000 She was like, I don't think I can talk to him.
00:21:09.000 I was like, yes, you can.
00:21:10.000 That doesn't mean anything.
00:21:12.000 So what?
00:21:12.000 So that's what he went for?
00:21:14.000 So what?
00:21:15.000 He's Bob, the guy with the dog.
00:21:16.000 He's a loving person who really is excited to see us and our children and our dog in the morning.
00:21:22.000 Stop using that thing, this one isolated thing, as a marker for whether or not this person can enter your life in any way.
00:21:31.000 The only way you should is if that person is trying to force that on you and make you believe what they believe.
00:21:37.000 Right.
00:21:37.000 And if you don't support Trump, then they hate you.
00:21:39.000 And then it becomes, it's virtually interchangeable with religion.
00:21:43.000 Yeah.
00:21:43.000 Right?
00:21:43.000 Like, if your next door neighbor's a Jew and the guy on the other side of you is a Baptist and you're an atheist, there's no reason why you can't all be great friends.
00:21:53.000 Yeah.
00:21:53.000 Great friends.
00:21:54.000 Yeah, hang out.
00:21:55.000 Just like, hey, what's up?
00:21:55.000 You guys want to come over?
00:21:56.000 We're going to do some hot dogs or whatever.
00:21:58.000 Right, exactly.
00:21:59.000 They're kosher.
00:21:59.000 You know what I mean?
00:22:00.000 Who gives a shit? 1.00
00:22:02.000 Who gives a shit? 1.00
00:22:03.000 Who gives a shit? 0.99
00:22:03.000 And isn't it more effective, if you are really politically minded and you really love Hillary and you love what she stood for and you want that, isn't it more effective to invite this guy into your life and let him see that he has a lot more in common with this liberal family at the end of the block than putting up walls and keeping him out? 0.99
00:22:25.000 I think that people were given a real disservice by being forced to choose only on one side or the other.
00:22:34.000 One of them is Donald Trump, and the other one is Hillary Clinton.
00:22:37.000 This hustle system that they put together of a two-party system is the reason why it's so difficult, because a party has to choose a candidate.
00:22:45.000 You have to vote in the primaries, so you have to be registered.
00:22:48.000 Not that many people are.
00:22:50.000 When you think about the actual numbers of people that vote in the primaries, it's a fraction of the people that vote in the general election, right?
00:22:55.000 And that's a fraction of the population.
00:22:57.000 Yeah.
00:22:57.000 And so if you're forced to choose between this really lackluster candidate and people say, oh, she had all this experience, regardless of what you think about Hillary, whether they supported her or not, you'd have to look at it objectively and say, well, she's a deeply flawed candidate.
00:23:14.000 I mean, she had a lot of issues. 1.00
00:23:15.000 There's a lot of credibility issues.
00:23:16.000 She didn't support gay marriage until 2013. That was one of my big red flags.
00:23:21.000 Yeah.
00:23:21.000 Because I'm like, how, why do you care?
00:23:23.000 Right.
00:23:24.000 Like, why do you care?
00:23:25.000 Like, if you really care, if you really think...
00:23:27.000 Really believe. 0.97
00:23:28.000 ...that gay people shouldn't have the same rights in terms of, like, bonding in a relationship than a straight person, well, that's a crazy person's idea. 0.98
00:23:36.000 Right. 1.00
00:23:36.000 Like, what do you give a shit? 1.00
00:23:37.000 Right. 1.00
00:23:38.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:24:02.000 Everything was fine, and everything was no big deal, and he's like, it's a fucking huge deal, and they, like, she would say that, you know, there was no evidence of this, and he said there was evidence of this on multiple occasions, and it's like, you look at the two of them back to back, you go, what the fuck, man? 0.99
00:24:16.000 Yeah. 0.98
00:24:17.000 And people got mad at me for making a big deal out of that. 0.96
00:24:19.000 Like, there's a lot of people that say, hey, man, you know, you're partially responsible, and people like you, for pointing out all this Hillary Clinton shit, like, no, no, we're talking about reality. 0.99
00:24:29.000 We're not responsible for reality-sucking. 0.95
00:24:32.000 But the idea is the opposite is don't talk about it at all.
00:24:35.000 Right.
00:24:36.000 And pretend it doesn't exist.
00:24:37.000 Pretend it doesn't exist.
00:24:38.000 And that's the problem with all these people being pit against each other.
00:24:41.000 You can't see the other side and have a little bit of flow.
00:24:45.000 I feel like it also...
00:24:49.000 It's almost like news is entertainment now.
00:24:52.000 When we watch 24-hour news programs and stuff, it's like rooting for the Bears or rooting for the Steelers.
00:24:58.000 You know what I mean?
00:24:59.000 It's become this passionate sport.
00:25:04.000 Entertaining sport.
00:25:05.000 It's kind of upsetting.
00:25:08.000 I mean, it's very upsetting.
00:25:09.000 Guys like that Sean Hannity guy.
00:25:11.000 How is that guy any more different than a local football broadcaster who's really excited about the Patriots? 0.98
00:25:19.000 Patriots kicking ass this season. 0.90
00:25:21.000 Oh my god, it's going to be great. 0.99
00:25:22.000 They're not going to be stopped.
00:25:23.000 The Patriots.
00:25:24.000 They say what they want about Brady. 0.97
00:25:26.000 He didn't deplete those balls. 0.98
00:25:28.000 Completely, yeah. 1.00
00:25:29.000 He's like a fucking raw, raw Republican character. 1.00
00:25:33.000 Right. 1.00
00:25:33.000 Almost like a football guy. 1.00
00:25:35.000 100%.
00:25:36.000 You know he's all in. 0.99
00:25:38.000 Whatever the fuck the Republican point is, he's all in. 0.99
00:25:40.000 Yeah, and you're not going to convince him to like the New York Giants. 0.99
00:25:44.000 He's a Patriots guy.
00:25:45.000 That's just the way it goes.
00:25:46.000 But I really feel like You've got to go through life.
00:25:50.000 And rather than thinking about, and I don't want to be too preachy, but not to be...
00:25:53.000 You shouldn't be going by my party.
00:25:56.000 You should be going by the acts of these people.
00:25:58.000 Yes.
00:25:59.000 So everybody's like...
00:26:02.000 So you can hate that Pruitt is...
00:26:08.000 Going after public lands and rolling back all this EPA stuff.
00:26:11.000 And then you see Trump make a deal yesterday with Pelosi and Schumer saying, we're going to try and make sure that these DACA kids are allowed to stay.
00:26:21.000 Right.
00:26:22.000 It threw everybody like, wait, what?
00:26:24.000 But I still have to hate him.
00:26:26.000 But Nancy Pelosi's in his office making a deal with him.
00:26:29.000 Well, that's how you should act.
00:26:30.000 It should be.
00:26:31.000 He should be allowed to do something kind.
00:26:33.000 He should be allowed to... 0.69
00:26:35.000 You should be allowed to call him out when he does something shitty.
00:26:38.000 It shouldn't be just this blanket, I love the guy no matter what.
00:26:42.000 Well, you know, someone said, and I forget who it was.
00:26:45.000 I forget who the person was that had this idea.
00:26:47.000 But the idea was that one of the good things about Trump would be that he is concerned with public opinion.
00:26:54.000 And so if he floats an idea out there and it's not popular or it's really damaging public opinion of him, he'll take a second look at it.
00:27:04.000 Which is a very non-politician-like thing to do.
00:27:06.000 You know, and people point to terrible things that he's done in the past almost as like evidence that he can't evolve. 0.78
00:27:13.000 You know, like evidence that he's a sociopath. 0.99
00:27:15.000 We're fucking doomed if that's the case. 0.99
00:27:18.000 With human beings in general. 0.99
00:27:20.000 With human beings in general, right.
00:27:22.000 And we're doomed.
00:27:23.000 I mean, if you can't learn at 70, is it over?
00:27:26.000 There's a difference.
00:27:27.000 When you're 20, you can figure things out.
00:27:28.000 When you're 30, I'm better than I was when I was 20. But when you get to 70, no.
00:27:34.000 There's no learning.
00:27:35.000 There's no more learning.
00:27:36.000 Even in a super extreme scenario, like being the president of the free world.
00:27:42.000 Yeah, it's terrifying.
00:27:43.000 I mean, he's the leader of the free world.
00:27:44.000 Yeah, at 70. At 70. And with a bunch of people that hate him.
00:27:48.000 And then talking about shipping immigrant kids back. 0.82
00:27:52.000 There's people that were born here when they were two.
00:27:55.000 Or they were brought here, rather, when they were two.
00:27:57.000 They were born in another country.
00:27:58.000 They don't know the other country at all.
00:27:59.000 And they'll send them back to it.
00:28:01.000 It's crazy.
00:28:01.000 It's scary.
00:28:02.000 It's very scary.
00:28:03.000 It's scary because there's no empathy to that.
00:28:06.000 No terror.
00:28:07.000 It's one thing if someone is some sort of a dangerous criminal. 1.00
00:28:11.000 Well, if that's the case, they should be in fucking jail. 0.99
00:28:13.000 That's what jail's for. 1.00
00:28:14.000 Right, of course.
00:28:15.000 So why would you just set them free in Mexico? 0.59
00:28:18.000 That sounds crazy.
00:28:19.000 And, you know, we have this girl in our life who...
00:28:22.000 She was born here.
00:28:24.000 She was part of that and has since gotten her citizenship, so she was safe.
00:28:29.000 But just recently, so as soon as they came in and started saying we might send them back, it was like terrible.
00:28:34.000 She was like hiding in our house.
00:28:36.000 Like, can I just sleep here?
00:28:37.000 She was so nervous.
00:28:38.000 Yeah.
00:28:38.000 To sleep in her little apartment somewhere because she thought they were going to come and get her.
00:28:42.000 Dude, a friend of mine is a contractor and he went to Home Depot and he's in Home Depot.
00:28:47.000 He gets out of his car and these ICE guys...
00:28:50.000 I mean, this guy is distinguished looking, you know, a handsome man.
00:28:54.000 Yeah.
00:28:55.000 In his 50s.
00:28:56.000 Right.
00:28:56.000 You know, and speaks perfect English.
00:28:59.000 Uh-huh. 1.00
00:29:01.000 They flash their fucking badges. 1.00
00:29:03.000 You know, he makes them. 1.00
00:29:04.000 Shows, the first they just said, you have to, and he goes, listen.
00:29:06.000 Just came up to him in the parking lot? 1.00
00:29:08.000 He goes, listen, dumbass. 1.00
00:29:09.000 He's like, he's former military. 1.00
00:29:10.000 He's like, I told him.
00:29:11.000 He goes, I was in the military.
00:29:12.000 Like, you guys can't just do this.
00:29:14.000 This is not something you do.
00:29:15.000 You don't just come up to someone and ask, where were you born?
00:29:17.000 Is that what they, that's how they led it?
00:29:19.000 They came up to him, where were you born?
00:29:20.000 Show me your ID. Oh my God.
00:29:21.000 And he was like, what the fuck are you guys doing? 0.99
00:29:24.000 He goes, I'm going to show you my military ID. Okay, here you go. 0.99
00:29:27.000 Now here's my ID. Okay, now, what the fuck are you guys doing? 1.00
00:29:31.000 You can't do this. 0.99
00:29:32.000 He's like, this is totally illegal.
00:29:34.000 That's insane.
00:29:35.000 Just grabbing people out of their cars for no reason.
00:29:38.000 Walking about your life. 0.81
00:29:39.000 Looking brown, bro.
00:29:40.000 You're looking pretty brown over there, bro.
00:29:42.000 See?
00:29:42.000 That's not kind.
00:29:44.000 Looking brown, bro.
00:29:44.000 Where you born?
00:29:45.000 That's insane.
00:29:46.000 They asked him where he was born.
00:29:47.000 That's so crazy.
00:29:48.000 He served in our military.
00:29:50.000 Exactly.
00:29:50.000 That's insane.
00:29:52.000 If you have any fucking control... 1.00
00:29:52.000 First of all, he was born in America. 1.00
00:29:54.000 He was.
00:29:54.000 Yes, absolutely.
00:29:56.000 But he has to prove that.
00:29:58.000 He has to prove it. 0.91
00:29:58.000 Because he's brown. 0.91
00:29:59.000 But just ask him, where did your parents have you?
00:30:03.000 It's the one thing you cannot control.
00:30:05.000 I know.
00:30:06.000 In a nation of immigrants! 0.98
00:30:08.000 Right, exactly.
00:30:11.000 We wouldn't be anything without immigration. 1.00
00:30:13.000 My parents' parents weren't born here.
00:30:16.000 Exactly.
00:30:16.000 Native Americans are the only ones who are legitimately here long enough to claim it.
00:30:23.000 Even they came across the fucking Bering Land Bridge from Asia. 0.98
00:30:27.000 Right before it split off. 0.98
00:30:28.000 It's nobody's spot.
00:30:30.000 It's nobody's. 1.00
00:30:30.000 You fucking assholes just taking a brown guy out of his Subaru. 1.00
00:30:36.000 I'm sure if you took those guys and those officials, they have to have the same story. 1.00
00:30:39.000 We all came from somewhere else.
00:30:41.000 I know.
00:30:42.000 It's insane.
00:30:43.000 It's so crazy.
00:30:43.000 This guy's not doing a crime.
00:30:45.000 Like, you're just assuming that he's some sort of an illegal immigrant because he's at Home Depot? 1.00
00:30:50.000 He needed paint, you fuck! 1.00
00:30:52.000 I know. 1.00
00:30:53.000 He fixes things himself. 1.00
00:30:54.000 He's a fucking contractor. 1.00
00:30:56.000 He can't be an American. 1.00
00:30:57.000 Oh, it's so weird. 1.00
00:30:58.000 We just throw our shit out. 1.00
00:30:59.000 He still has to fix his TV? Alright, if that's not... 1.00
00:31:02.000 Is that racial profiling or is that racist?
00:31:07.000 I feel like it's more racist.
00:31:09.000 I think it's more racist because, look, racist really means that you are using power to put people down for the race.
00:31:16.000 And when we say racist is just saying something shitty about somebody.
00:31:20.000 It's not really.
00:31:21.000 It's when you really have power over people and use that.
00:31:25.000 Yeah.
00:31:25.000 And that's what that is.
00:31:27.000 Oh, yeah, 100%.
00:31:27.000 And it's like a target.
00:31:30.000 And here's the thing, man.
00:31:32.000 Maybe he's right 30% of the time that he does this.
00:31:36.000 Maybe that cop does that all the time and catches these guys that are there that are illegal immigrants and they're just there to try to hustle and work on people's houses. 1.00
00:31:45.000 That's why we have laws. 0.99
00:31:47.000 Exactly.
00:31:48.000 But here's the thing.
00:31:48.000 It's a wasted resource.
00:31:49.000 Unless they're criminals.
00:31:50.000 Right. 0.53
00:31:51.000 Unless they're criminals. 1.00
00:31:52.000 All there are people who were fucked up. 1.00
00:31:54.000 Right. 1.00
00:31:54.000 Fucked at birth. 1.00
00:31:55.000 At birth. 1.00
00:31:56.000 At birth.
00:31:57.000 Just because of where they came.
00:31:58.000 Right.
00:31:59.000 They're stuck in some poor country and they figure out a way to get across the border illegally.
00:32:04.000 To work!
00:32:05.000 Can you imagine how desperate people must be in these other countries?
00:32:10.000 That you would, as a father, you would tell your kids, go with this man and hopefully get over to that other country for a better life.
00:32:19.000 Could you imagine how desperate you would have to be to tell your children, go!
00:32:26.000 That is a desperate, desperate situation.
00:32:29.000 And it just is this roll of the dice that you were born 50 miles that way.
00:32:35.000 Or like my friend Justin, who makes these wells for people in the Congo.
00:32:39.000 The well, just having fresh water, changes their life.
00:32:42.000 The one thing that we absolutely take for granted.
00:32:44.000 Yeah.
00:32:44.000 They give it away free at restaurants.
00:32:47.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:32:49.000 The thing that we give away to everybody for free is the thing that changes their life in the Congo. 0.99
00:32:53.000 A fresh, clean glass of water.
00:32:55.000 Is that amazing?
00:32:56.000 To us, it's nothing.
00:32:56.000 Nothing.
00:32:57.000 It's everything. 1.00
00:32:57.000 You clean your asshole with it, with those Japanese toilets. 1.00
00:33:01.000 You have one of those? 1.00
00:33:01.000 I do. 1.00
00:33:02.000 They're the best.
00:33:02.000 Oh, it's the best.
00:33:03.000 They're the best.
00:33:04.000 I moved into a house.
00:33:05.000 We didn't know what it was, and we were just looking around, and we walk into the bathroom, and the lid opened.
00:33:10.000 It was Oh, when it sees you, it's one of those.
00:33:12.000 Oh, yeah.
00:33:13.000 Next level.
00:33:13.000 And the seat is warm.
00:33:15.000 Oh, it's heaven.
00:33:16.000 It is.
00:33:17.000 It's almost sexual. 1.00
00:33:19.000 I mean, because that warm water is shooting into your asshole. 1.00
00:33:22.000 And here's the thing. 1.00
00:33:24.000 There's only an on-off button.
00:33:25.000 There's no timer. 1.00
00:33:27.000 It doesn't go, hey, fucker, enough, you creep. 1.00
00:33:30.000 How many people are just sitting there with water shooting out of their asshole, stroking their shaft? 1.00
00:33:35.000 It must be like the number one tool for masturbation. 1.00
00:33:41.000 And everybody around the world does it, but Americans. 0.99
00:33:45.000 It's not, right?
00:33:46.000 The bidet is not a main thing in America. 1.00
00:33:48.000 What we prefer to do is chop down trees and make a fine paper of that that we smear shit all over our asshole with. 1.00
00:33:56.000 That's the standard. 1.00
00:33:57.000 And then walk about your day. 1.00
00:33:58.000 Yeah, with fecal matter all over the fucking room. 1.00
00:34:01.000 I mean, we could radically cut down on the amount of fecal matter available if we just had jets of water that clean our asshole like the rest of the world. 1.00
00:34:10.000 Right, just fly it out. 0.99
00:34:12.000 But the rest of the world, they do that bidet thing, which is awkward.
00:34:14.000 It's like the most un-ergonomic thing ever created.
00:34:18.000 Well, those tubes and those... 1.00
00:34:21.000 It's right where your asshole goes, and there's nowhere to sit. 1.00
00:34:24.000 It seems much nastier. 1.00
00:34:25.000 The first time you walk into a hotel and saw that as a kid, you're like, what the hell?
00:34:29.000 I don't care if I'm cleaner.
00:34:30.000 I'm not doing that.
00:34:31.000 I was in a hotel in New York City.
00:34:34.000 I forgot the hotel. 0.99
00:34:35.000 But they had some crazy setup where there was not just a bidet, but they had two fucking hoses. 0.99
00:34:45.000 One on either side of the bowl. 0.99
00:34:48.000 In that hard metal... 0.99
00:34:49.000 So you got a bidet over here, and then you got a bath with these two fucking car wash hoses that are right next to the toilet. 0.99
00:34:58.000 How clean do you have to be? 1.00
00:34:59.000 But it's like, I mean, are you just shooting water everywhere while you're shitting? 0.98
00:35:04.000 What are you doing with those two? 0.99
00:35:06.000 What are you doing in there?
00:35:07.000 Is it like one in the right hand and one in the left hand?
00:35:10.000 Yeah, why? 1.00
00:35:11.000 I don't like cleaning my asshole with my right hand. 1.00
00:35:13.000 Can't do it. 1.00
00:35:13.000 Gotta go left. 1.00
00:35:13.000 And I have to reach over here and grab this and strangle myself as I clean my butt. 1.00
00:35:17.000 I'm not... 0.98
00:35:18.000 I keep my phone.
00:35:19.000 I looked this up when that happened.
00:35:21.000 I remember that.
00:35:22.000 Yeah? 0.99
00:35:22.000 The answer, I don't know if it's even better than the bidet, it's to clean the shit off the inside of the toilet. 0.99
00:35:27.000 That many? 0.99
00:35:28.000 No.
00:35:28.000 One of them is.
00:35:29.000 That's why it's so hard.
00:35:30.000 Double hose, bro.
00:35:31.000 It's like to keep it clean the whole time.
00:35:32.000 What if you get the wrong one?
00:35:33.000 I don't know what the second one's for, but that's what one of them is for.
00:35:36.000 Really?
00:35:37.000 That seems so.
00:35:37.000 You know what?
00:35:37.000 What's a shitty way to do it?
00:35:39.000 Pardon my pun. 0.95
00:35:40.000 These people are eating the wrong foods. 1.00
00:35:44.000 Yeah, what kind of shit's he taking? 1.00
00:35:47.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:35:47.000 Thank you. 1.00
00:35:48.000 You guys are monsters. 0.98
00:35:49.000 Would you ever... 0.95
00:35:50.000 Have you ever thought about going to other countries and doing volunteer work?
00:35:58.000 What is that?
00:35:59.000 This came out yesterday or the day before. 1.00
00:36:01.000 You guys are talking about shit. 1.00
00:36:02.000 What? 1.00
00:36:03.000 140-town fat bird.
00:36:05.000 Ton.
00:36:05.000 Ton.
00:36:07.000 140 ton.
00:36:08.000 Oh my god.
00:36:08.000 Fatberg has been discovered under the streets of London.
00:36:11.000 What does that mean?
00:36:12.000 It's oil, fat, tampons, wet wipes, diapers.
00:36:17.000 Oh, it's a...
00:36:17.000 And it's stuck in this...
00:36:19.000 It's like concrete now, they said.
00:36:20.000 It's stuck in this pipe.
00:36:21.000 Oh my god.
00:36:22.000 Look at this...
00:36:23.000 420 pounds.
00:36:24.000 A fatberg the size of two football pitches. 0.67
00:36:26.000 Is that mainly a soccer stadium?
00:36:28.000 Yeah, it's 120 feet.
00:36:29.000 It looks like the globe.
00:36:30.000 Is that bigger or shorter than American football?
00:36:32.000 I think it's a little longer.
00:36:33.000 Of course it is.
00:36:34.000 And wider.
00:36:35.000 Was found in London sewers.
00:36:38.000 Jesus Christ.
00:36:39.000 And is it blocking something?
00:36:40.000 Is that what the deal is? 0.99
00:36:41.000 Yeah, I think it's blocking shit now. 0.99
00:36:41.000 Oh my God. 0.99
00:36:42.000 What are you going to do?
00:36:43.000 It's blocking a big section of the pipes under there. 0.99
00:36:47.000 Holy shit. 0.99
00:36:49.000 Makes sense. 1.00
00:36:50.000 That is like the ultimate clogged drain.
00:36:53.000 So nasty.
00:36:54.000 That's what it is, right?
00:36:54.000 Yeah.
00:36:55.000 No plungers getting that out.
00:36:57.000 Did I ever show you the picture of the tree that was growing in my toilet pipe?
00:37:00.000 No. 0.99
00:37:00.000 The shit tree? 0.99
00:37:01.000 No. 1.00
00:37:02.000 Dude.
00:37:03.000 I was having a problem.
00:37:05.000 My toilet wouldn't flush correctly.
00:37:07.000 So I had a fella come over to take care of it. 0.99
00:37:10.000 And he said, dude, he goes, look at that.
00:37:12.000 That's an actual picture of the thing that was in my bathroom.
00:37:16.000 What is it?
00:37:17.000 That is a tree.
00:37:20.000 That's roots got into a small crack in the water pipe.
00:37:25.000 Because they grow and they continue to grow where the pipe is and they crack it.
00:37:30.000 And once they crack it, something goes inside and then it grows where the water is all up the pipe.
00:37:36.000 So the pipe was clogged with like a tree.
00:37:39.000 It looked like an animal. 0.57
00:37:40.000 Oh my god, it's disgusting.
00:37:42.000 So for years you were just, you thought it was going that right out of the pipe?
00:37:47.000 It shows you what I'm eating is super healthy.
00:37:52.000 You're literally shooting trees. 0.63
00:37:55.000 Yeah, all the vitamins that come out in my piss.
00:37:57.000 Like, my piss is always a bright orange.
00:37:59.000 It's the happiest...
00:38:00.000 Because I take so many vitamins.
00:38:01.000 It's the happiest root I ever saw.
00:38:03.000 That root went hog wild.
00:38:04.000 It's like almost proof that what I'm doing...
00:38:07.000 It's like a little shop of ours.
00:38:08.000 Like, feed me, Joe.
00:38:10.000 I don't think I was eating wild game back then either.
00:38:16.000 I wonder what it would look like now.
00:38:17.000 It was happier in your toilet than it was out in nature.
00:38:21.000 What if you change your diet and it turned different colors? 0.99
00:38:25.000 Like it's only growing that color because if you shit in it maybe with a high beat concentrate diet? 0.99
00:38:34.000 That's so big it looks like it has a personality. 0.99
00:38:36.000 Probably does.
00:38:37.000 He's probably telling the rest of the trees.
00:38:39.000 Get in here, bro.
00:38:40.000 I'm so happy.
00:38:41.000 Did you hear about Don?
00:38:41.000 Found a fountain of nutrients.
00:38:42.000 There's water and shit. 1.00
00:38:44.000 Don? 0.99
00:38:44.000 You're gonna love it. 0.99
00:38:45.000 Wait a minute.
00:38:46.000 In a pipe?
00:38:47.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:38:47.000 You live in a stew of water and shit. 1.00
00:38:49.000 And they keep dropping shit on you every day. 1.00
00:38:52.000 And you absorb it. 1.00
00:38:54.000 No way!
00:38:54.000 You live there?
00:38:55.000 Yeah, bro.
00:38:56.000 There's no dirt. 0.99
00:38:56.000 It's just water and shit. 0.99
00:38:58.000 And they let you live there? 1.00
00:38:59.000 No, he has no idea I'm there. 1.00
00:39:00.000 Bro, I'm telling you, dirt sucks. 1.00
00:39:02.000 Fuck dirt. 1.00
00:39:03.000 What you need to do is grow in a shit pipe. 1.00
00:39:06.000 Fuck, dude. 1.00
00:39:06.000 That sounds amazing. 1.00
00:39:07.000 A shit pipe. 1.00
00:39:08.000 Growing in a shit pipe for a tree is like being Jay-Z with a cigar for a regular person. 1.00
00:39:13.000 Sitting on a yacht. 1.00
00:39:14.000 He's so happy. 1.00
00:39:15.000 He found the shit pipe. 1.00
00:39:16.000 He's just in the pipe. 1.00
00:39:17.000 Bro, he's out there hustling. 1.00
00:39:18.000 He made his way up the shit pipe. 1.00
00:39:20.000 You hear about Harry? 1.00
00:39:21.000 Yeah, bro. 1.00
00:39:22.000 He worked at that fucking pipe for years, man. 1.00
00:39:25.000 You gotta admit, the dude put his time in. 1.00
00:39:27.000 There's a lot of weeds out there that are complaining about Harry, but these fuckers, they grow real fast, and then they just stay the same size. 0.99
00:39:34.000 They're not hustlers. 1.00
00:39:36.000 I don't know.
00:39:36.000 They don't have the long game like Harry.
00:39:38.000 I don't know.
00:39:40.000 Harry seems happy, but could he be?
00:39:41.000 I mean, I would miss the sun.
00:39:43.000 Personally, I'd miss the sunshine.
00:39:45.000 You say that, okay?
00:39:46.000 But Harry's mostly a root, alright?
00:39:48.000 Yeah, true.
00:39:49.000 And he could be out there in the dirt and occasionally peek up a little.
00:39:52.000 Good point.
00:39:52.000 You know those sad roots that have the story to the rest of the root system?
00:39:57.000 Like, they're up above.
00:39:58.000 Yeah.
00:39:58.000 And the rest of the root's like, what's going on up there?
00:40:00.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00
00:40:01.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00
00:40:02.000 A deer's coming. 1.00
00:40:03.000 I'm making a break for it.
00:40:04.000 A deer's gonna eat the little saplings. 1.00
00:40:06.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00
00:40:07.000 I miss Harry. 1.00
00:40:09.000 Yeah, Harry was a hustler. 0.85
00:40:11.000 Harry is the Jay-Z of tree roots. 0.98
00:40:13.000 Dude, did you hear?
00:40:14.000 Harry got busted.
00:40:15.000 What?
00:40:15.000 Yeah, this plumber came in.
00:40:17.000 He got ambitious.
00:40:18.000 They ripped him out.
00:40:19.000 He got too big!
00:40:20.000 I was telling him, you gotta stay small! 1.00
00:40:22.000 You get too big, you fucking selling keys every day, and that's when they come for you. 0.99
00:40:29.000 It's behind the music all over again. 0.99
00:40:31.000 It is.
00:40:32.000 That is terrible. 0.96
00:40:33.000 It is behind the music, goddammit. 0.82
00:40:34.000 You're right.
00:40:35.000 Harry got too big.
00:40:37.000 I would... 1.00
00:40:38.000 He's a goddamn Bad Company song. 0.99
00:40:41.000 Yeah. 0.98
00:40:47.000 When you see what's going on around the world in these horrible places, my daughters have friends and in the summer their parents take them to Haiti or someplace and they work for a week or two helping build these places.
00:41:04.000 And it's not...
00:41:05.000 I was like, this is just like a white... 0.97
00:41:08.000 You know, I'm feeling good about myself kind of a thing.
00:41:11.000 You know what I mean?
00:41:12.000 And then I go back home. 1.00
00:41:13.000 Fucking white people, man. 1.00
00:41:15.000 But they really do need the help. 1.00
00:41:18.000 Like, they really honestly benefit from people coming down and helping them and bringing supplies and stuff.
00:41:25.000 Do you have any desire to do that?
00:41:26.000 Like, you're a pygmy guy?
00:41:29.000 Yeah, I'd have to really think that one through, man. 0.99
00:41:33.000 I think my best method of helping is just talking shit here about it. 0.99
00:41:39.000 Yeah, you're good at it. 0.99
00:41:42.000 Yeah, I mean, donating money.
00:41:45.000 Yeah.
00:41:45.000 But I don't know about going there physically.
00:41:47.000 Getting a hammer and go sleeping on a...
00:41:49.000 I don't know if that's the most effective thing for me.
00:41:51.000 Yeah.
00:41:51.000 Maybe that's just a cop-out on my part.
00:41:53.000 I don't know.
00:41:54.000 I feel like I should do it once.
00:41:56.000 You know what I think the real issue with all these different places is?
00:41:59.000 Mm-hmm.
00:42:02.000 There's only so much access to growth in certain places.
00:42:06.000 We think of life as being growth-oriented, especially in this country.
00:42:12.000 In this country, we think of life not as like, do you have enough to eat?
00:42:16.000 Do you have friends around you that you care about?
00:42:19.000 Are you having a good time?
00:42:19.000 We don't think about it that way.
00:42:21.000 Right.
00:42:21.000 We think about it as, are you constantly moving forward?
00:42:24.000 Are you out of the clubs now?
00:42:25.000 Right.
00:42:26.000 Are you doing some theaters now?
00:42:28.000 Oh, good, good, good.
00:42:29.000 I heard you guys bought a new house.
00:42:32.000 Yeah, you're always moving.
00:42:34.000 Yeah, you're always moving.
00:42:35.000 You're moving up.
00:42:35.000 Moving up.
00:42:36.000 Always going forward.
00:42:37.000 Whereas, that is just how we mark success.
00:42:40.000 Mm-hmm.
00:42:42.000 In a lot of cultures, that's not even a part of life.
00:42:45.000 There is no, like, moving up.
00:42:46.000 Like, you can get a job, and you can work, and you're part of this community, and you do whatever you do, whether you're a fisherman or whether you're a carpenter or whatever you do.
00:42:53.000 Yeah.
00:42:53.000 But that's it.
00:42:54.000 You just live that life.
00:42:55.000 And so that's their idea of what life is.
00:42:58.000 Now, our idea of life is, you know, get a nice car, get a nice house, get a big TV. But what if there's something past that, right?
00:43:07.000 Like, what if some new thing comes along that makes this idea completely fucking ridiculous? 0.98
00:43:12.000 No, no, no. 0.98
00:43:13.000 You get enough credit so you can plug into the Matrix.
00:43:15.000 Right.
00:43:15.000 And then we start thinking like that.
00:43:17.000 This idea that the only way your life could ever be good is if you get a nice new laptop.
00:43:23.000 Right.
00:43:23.000 Or you live in a nice community.
00:43:27.000 Yeah.
00:43:27.000 That seems a little weird.
00:43:29.000 Because really it's just life.
00:43:30.000 Yeah.
00:43:31.000 No, I know.
00:43:32.000 I mean, the bigger...
00:43:33.000 Yeah.
00:43:33.000 And then you get...
00:43:34.000 You accumulate more...
00:43:35.000 The problem with it is that you accumulate more things.
00:43:37.000 Yes.
00:43:38.000 And then you're still in that vulnerable...
00:43:42.000 Feeling, now I gotta pay for this and move forward and get, like you say, get more.
00:43:47.000 Then you're with your friend on his private chat and you're like, oh, well I don't have that.
00:43:51.000 I guess I have to keep working.
00:43:52.000 You know what I mean?
00:43:53.000 Oh yeah.
00:43:54.000 And then this guy has a yacht.
00:43:55.000 Oh my god.
00:43:56.000 He's got a yacht?
00:43:57.000 He's got a 59 foot yacht.
00:43:59.000 This isn't even big.
00:44:00.000 What's big?
00:44:00.000 Like 150 foot?
00:44:01.000 120 foot.
00:44:02.000 What's a good size yacht?
00:44:05.000 Connor put this up the other day.
00:44:06.000 This yacht pulled up behind him when he was hanging out wherever he is.
00:44:09.000 That's a yacht? 0.91
00:44:10.000 I started thinking about the problems you would have if you had this yacht.
00:44:14.000 You've got to have a security team because I'll show you how big it is.
00:44:17.000 Oh my god.
00:44:18.000 That looks like the Death Star.
00:44:19.000 It's got openings on the side for...
00:44:21.000 Oh, Jesus.
00:44:22.000 For your jet skis and boats.
00:44:23.000 A whole boat can go inside the yacht.
00:44:26.000 Jesus Christ.
00:44:27.000 The problems you would have if you had this yacht would be even crazier.
00:44:30.000 I don't know what it is.
00:44:31.000 Oh my God, look at that.
00:44:32.000 Where is this?
00:44:32.000 It's like a space yacht.
00:44:34.000 Ibiza, I think, is where it is.
00:44:34.000 Maybe something like that.
00:44:35.000 Ibiza?
00:44:35.000 Yeah.
00:44:36.000 That's amazing.
00:44:36.000 You know how they say it?
00:44:37.000 They say Ibiza.
00:44:38.000 What is that? 0.96
00:44:39.000 That's silly. 1.00
00:44:40.000 Tell him to put a TH on that bitch. 1.00
00:44:42.000 No, there's a... 1.00
00:44:43.000 The yacht's incredible, man.
00:44:44.000 It's crazy.
00:44:45.000 Yeah.
00:44:46.000 Yeah, but what's enough, I guess, is the thing.
00:44:48.000 Look at that thing, man.
00:44:49.000 $360 million yacht, he said.
00:44:51.000 Jesus Christ.
00:44:52.000 What?
00:44:54.000 $360 million yacht.
00:44:56.000 Wow. 0.99
00:44:56.000 Fucking A, man. 0.99
00:44:58.000 That's when you're ballin'. 1.00
00:44:59.000 See?
00:45:01.000 What are we doing wrong that we don't have that?
00:45:04.000 Even Jay-Z's sitting back with his cigar going, We've got to sell more records.
00:45:07.000 We've got to bring back record sales.
00:45:09.000 It's the one way.
00:45:10.000 We looked at the books.
00:45:11.000 These live concerts just can't do it.
00:45:13.000 There's just not enough money to charge for tickets.
00:45:15.000 I need $390 million to get a slightly larger yacht with a diamond-encrusted anchor.
00:45:25.000 Exactly.
00:45:26.000 And a crew that will lower it and wipe the water off when we pull it out of the water. 0.99
00:45:31.000 A crew of hot white chicks with big asses. 1.00
00:45:34.000 It's the only buddy who works there. 1.00
00:45:36.000 They don't hire any third world help. 0.98
00:45:38.000 It's all hot white chicks. 1.00
00:45:40.000 Do you think it's a sickness that we have to keep racing?
00:45:42.000 Or do you feel like it's healthy?
00:45:43.000 I feel like it keeps you making stuff and keeps you...
00:45:47.000 You know creating and doing things um, it can it can be either or right?
00:45:51.000 I mean it could be a good thing because people who aren't ambitious and don't get things done a lot of times We all know like lazy guys and they're you know, sometimes their family can suffer Yeah, they don't make ends meet and it's not because of a lack of opportunity Right because they fuck up and they're lazy and they don't just gear with it and get together but At a certain point in time,
00:46:13.000 we definitely know people that are caught up in it to the point where that's all they're concerned with.
00:46:18.000 All they're concerned with is moving up and the numbers and the ladder and the...
00:46:22.000 Yeah.
00:46:22.000 That's not good either.
00:46:23.000 No, it's not.
00:46:24.000 So either one...
00:46:25.000 It's like you've defined this comfortable balance as a human being.
00:46:29.000 Yeah.
00:46:29.000 And don't get swept away by your pursuit.
00:46:31.000 Right.
00:46:31.000 Because your pursuit is just something that you're engaging in.
00:46:33.000 Yeah.
00:46:34.000 This is why I like to look at, this is a fucking very hippie way to look at things, but I honestly like to look at all my pursuits, like everything I do, or I try to do, as something that hopefully makes me a better person. 0.87
00:46:46.000 Mm-hmm. 0.69
00:46:47.000 As contradictory as they are in some ways, like jujitsu, a lot of people would think would be contradictory to making you a better person.
00:46:54.000 No, you're just out there strangling people.
00:46:56.000 It seems kind of mean, Joe Rogan.
00:46:58.000 That's not really what you're doing.
00:47:00.000 What you're doing is you're testing yourself in these extreme situations with other like-minded people.
00:47:04.000 And you develop a lot.
00:47:05.000 First of all, you develop a keen understanding of your actual vulnerability.
00:47:09.000 Right.
00:47:09.000 You know, because...
00:47:10.000 I've been choked out by people that I outweigh by like 30 pounds, 40 pounds.
00:47:15.000 Really?
00:47:15.000 Strangling.
00:47:16.000 Yeah, for sure, man.
00:47:16.000 It happens all the time.
00:47:17.000 And I'm decent, right?
00:47:19.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:47:19.000 And I get my ass kicked by people way smaller than me. 1.00
00:47:22.000 Wow. 1.00
00:47:22.000 It's humbling. 1.00
00:47:23.000 And people bigger than me that are better than me, they just run right through me like I don't exist.
00:47:26.000 And I've been doing it a long time.
00:47:28.000 So imagine the average person that has this delusional perspective of who they are.
00:47:33.000 Right.
00:47:34.000 You also got to get used to getting tapped out, and getting tapped out is humbling, and it doesn't feel good.
00:47:41.000 And then you have to be able to just accept it.
00:47:43.000 It's just a learning thing.
00:47:44.000 Don't get your ego attached to this.
00:47:46.000 The reason why you got tapped out is your arm is supposed to be here, and you reached here, and you got caught.
00:47:51.000 So don't do that anymore.
00:47:52.000 Now you know.
00:47:52.000 You should thank that person for taking advantage of whatever possibilities you leave.
00:47:59.000 Because when you leave these openings, now you need to know those openings are there.
00:48:02.000 Because you didn't know it was there before.
00:48:03.000 Next time, you won't do this with your arm.
00:48:05.000 You'll keep your arm right here like you're supposed to.
00:48:07.000 And you might still get tapped out, but it'll be harder.
00:48:11.000 Isn't it amazing?
00:48:12.000 Anytime you talk about whether it makes you a good person, any kind of a thing like that, like what you're talking about, is kind of similar to yoga.
00:48:21.000 It's kind of similar to what we're talking about, like going and helping the pygmy. 0.79
00:48:24.000 It's all about...
00:48:26.000 The common denominator with all of it is getting your ego out of it.
00:48:29.000 Getting your ego out of the way.
00:48:31.000 It's a big thing.
00:48:32.000 And looking at it objectively.
00:48:33.000 Looking at it like really taking some objective time.
00:48:36.000 Yeah.
00:48:36.000 A lot of people just keep going.
00:48:38.000 Right.
00:48:38.000 And they don't ever stop and assess.
00:48:40.000 Yeah.
00:48:40.000 And look at themselves.
00:48:41.000 How could I have done that better?
00:48:43.000 How could I have handled this better?
00:48:45.000 Yeah.
00:48:46.000 There's a real...
00:48:47.000 It's like if you can get rid of the...
00:48:52.000 The ego and the self and realize you're a part of something larger.
00:48:57.000 Like even in jujitsu, the way you're describing it, it's that you're interacting with other human beings.
00:49:01.000 It's not like you just isolated, walking around thinking I'm great.
00:49:04.000 It's only when you get there with other people that you're kind of learning and having that back and forth.
00:49:10.000 And I honestly think yoga is real similar in that way, too.
00:49:14.000 Yoga is very humbling.
00:49:15.000 And you do it together with a group of people, and everyone's struggling.
00:49:20.000 It's brutal.
00:49:21.000 And you're on the mat next to two tiny girls who are just doing things that you can't do. 1.00
00:49:28.000 Ever.
00:49:28.000 And you're just like, it's humbling.
00:49:30.000 Yeah, it's humbling.
00:49:31.000 It's super humbling.
00:49:32.000 There's a lady that works out at my yoga class sometimes. 1.00
00:49:34.000 She's in her Maybe...
00:49:37.000 She might be 60, but she's definitely in her late 50s. 1.00
00:49:40.000 Yeah.
00:49:41.000 And she's jacked, dude. 1.00
00:49:42.000 She's jacked. 0.86
00:49:44.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:49:45.000 She does handstands and shit. 1.00
00:49:46.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:49:46.000 It's like, it's so inspirational. 0.99
00:49:48.000 Amazing. 0.97
00:49:49.000 And watching this lady take a yoga class, I mean, she does CrossFit, and she's just fucking completely shredded. 1.00
00:49:55.000 I mean, six-pack, shoulders, just obviously fantastic genetics, but also... 0.90
00:50:01.000 Never stop working out.
00:50:03.000 Right.
00:50:03.000 Like her whole life.
00:50:03.000 Always moving.
00:50:04.000 Yeah.
00:50:04.000 Always doing it.
00:50:05.000 It's like, Jesus.
00:50:06.000 And to be next to this lady, who's also, of course, ultra-flexible. 0.97
00:50:09.000 Yeah.
00:50:09.000 In a class.
00:50:10.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:50:11.000 And if you watch her do all this, she's like, holy shit. 1.00
00:50:13.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:50:14.000 Humbling.
00:50:15.000 Your arms are shaking like a little baby giraffe.
00:50:17.000 But I think even for her, it's humbling, though.
00:50:18.000 That's my point. 0.99
00:50:19.000 It's fucking hard. 0.98
00:50:20.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:50:21.000 When you do hard shit, and I don't think enough of us do, hard shit puts things in perspective. 1.00
00:50:25.000 Your mind wants to gravitate towards softness and the couch and the easy road and naps. 1.00
00:50:31.000 Yeah.
00:50:31.000 Yeah.
00:50:32.000 Ah, fuck that. 1.00
00:50:33.000 Let's quit. 1.00
00:50:33.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:50:33.000 You know, your mind gravitates towards that easy. 1.00
00:50:36.000 Oh, 100%.
00:50:36.000 Yeah.
00:50:37.000 It's just like, oh, someone's gave me, someone said, you know why people wallow in shit? 1.00
00:50:44.000 Because it's warm and comfortable there. 1.00
00:50:48.000 Isn't that great?
00:50:49.000 It is great.
00:50:50.000 Isn't that great?
00:50:51.000 It is great.
00:50:51.000 It is.
00:50:52.000 It's like, oh, it's just like this, but you know, there's that thing.
00:50:56.000 Talking about living in these communities in other countries and you're a fisherman and you do your little thing. 0.99
00:51:02.000 Is that wallowing in shit and just staying small? 0.99
00:51:05.000 Or is there beauty and a great life living in something small like that? 1.00
00:51:10.000 There's beauty and a great life in doing things that make you happy.
00:51:13.000 And there's a lot of people that believe that subsistence living, like those folks that live off the land in villages and they catch fish and they have a whole setup, and they're not without food.
00:51:24.000 They have food, but their life essentially is about procuring food.
00:51:28.000 It's not about getting a job at a factory somewhere.
00:51:31.000 Right.
00:51:32.000 And then a factory will come along.
00:51:33.000 And then all of a sudden, the factory says, hey, we'll pay you $2 a day. 0.98
00:51:37.000 Like, holy shit, I've never seen $2 in my life. 0.99
00:51:38.000 And you start working for this factory, and now you're eating terrible food. 0.99
00:51:42.000 You're not hanging out in the village.
00:51:44.000 You're working all day. 0.99
00:51:45.000 And you're making whatever fucking brand of sneakers that they sell in America, because they can make them down there and pay a guy $2 a day. 0.99
00:51:51.000 Or whatever the rate is. 0.99
00:51:53.000 I'm obviously exaggerating.
00:51:54.000 But I don't think I'm exaggerating by much.
00:51:56.000 It's probably like $2 an hour, maybe.
00:51:58.000 So, oh, you get $16 a day. 0.97
00:52:00.000 Whoa, you're fucking really taking care of your guys. 0.96
00:52:02.000 Right. 0.97
00:52:03.000 You're a good man. 0.99
00:52:04.000 We could ship shit down there to have it taken care of and that these people, without us, would be broke. 0.98
00:52:10.000 Okay, maybe they would. 0.99
00:52:11.000 Or maybe they live in a rich eco-environment, right?
00:52:16.000 Yeah.
00:52:17.000 Maybe they live in, like...
00:52:18.000 Yeah, nice, simple...
00:52:20.000 Yeah.
00:52:20.000 Maybe they live in the jungle.
00:52:21.000 Simple, healthy world.
00:52:22.000 Yeah.
00:52:23.000 Maybe they live in... 0.99
00:52:24.000 You ever seen that fucking Werder Herzog documentary, Happy People? 0.99
00:52:28.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:52:29.000 No.
00:52:29.000 It's called Happy People, something in the Taiga, Life in the Taiga.
00:52:35.000 It's about the Taiga River in Siberia, and these people that live up there, and they have almost no money.
00:52:41.000 Everything, whatever money that they do have, like if they trap furs and stuff like that, they'll trade it in for equipment and some money to get supplies.
00:52:50.000 Right.
00:52:51.000 And then they live off the land.
00:52:52.000 Everything is living off the land.
00:52:53.000 Right. 0.99
00:52:53.000 And they're like the fucking happiest people in the world. 0.99
00:52:56.000 Really? 0.99
00:52:56.000 It's weird, man. 0.99
00:52:58.000 It's a super weird documentary and it really makes you confront like what is life about.
00:53:03.000 Yeah.
00:53:03.000 And then also these two questions, right?
00:53:06.000 Like, are they happy because we evolved that way?
00:53:10.000 And that those motions of going out and catching fish and hunting and growing your own vegetables and having a tight-knit, small community, is the benefit in that is that it hits all the old notes that we've had since we evolved, you know,
00:53:25.000 from the time we were lower primates to living in these small clusters of monkey people to Living in villages to working together and living off the land. 0.96
00:53:34.000 And then that has been going on for so long.
00:53:36.000 Yeah, your DNA knows it.
00:53:38.000 Yeah, that this most recent trend of moving towards some sort of a technological world is so uncomfortable for us.
00:53:43.000 And this working in cubicles with fluorescent lighting is so new.
00:53:46.000 Yeah.
00:53:47.000 No, it's unhealthy.
00:53:49.000 My sister runs this little non-profit in New Jersey called City Green.
00:53:54.000 And she takes these cities like... 0.99
00:53:57.000 Passaic and Patterson, these places that were booming and now they've kind of fallen off.
00:54:02.000 And she creates these city gardens in all these different places and brings young students in to sit and work with the earth and grow vegetables.
00:54:12.000 The change in these kids who are just on their phones and just in this tough city world and there's no money and it's like this desperate...
00:54:20.000 There's no sense of place.
00:54:22.000 There's no sense of what you're supposed to do.
00:54:25.000 They sit and garden and actually smell the dirt and harvest vegetables and cook that food.
00:54:31.000 It changes their life.
00:54:33.000 Because just what you're saying, it's what we're supposed to do.
00:54:36.000 It's our nature as beasts to do these things.
00:54:40.000 I'm not necessarily saying it's what we're supposed to do as much as I'm saying it's what we did do for so long that we know it and the grooves have already been cut.
00:54:47.000 Almost like what we're doing now.
00:54:49.000 It's like, you ever try to...
00:54:50.000 Take a screwdriver, and a screwdriver doesn't quite fit the screw, but you can kind of make it work.
00:54:57.000 And when you kind of make it work, it kind of chews up the screw a little bit.
00:55:00.000 This is every time I use a screwdriver.
00:55:02.000 That's a human being in a city.
00:55:04.000 Right.
00:55:05.000 So it doesn't slot right in.
00:55:07.000 Now think a human being that's living in like the taiga, you're talking about grooves that have been polished and cut and the exact fit for the environment.
00:55:15.000 Boom! 0.99
00:55:15.000 So all their human reward systems for survival, they're not based on some sort of technological innovation that will move us towards a world of artificial intelligence and fucking the internet going through your brain, pumping through the sky and Wi-Fi all over the globe. 0.99
00:55:31.000 No.
00:55:32.000 Their grooves are carved differently than ours.
00:55:34.000 Right.
00:55:35.000 But don't you think your groove...
00:55:37.000 Like when you go out into the woods, don't you feel...
00:55:40.000 Terrified.
00:55:41.000 Shouldn't be there.
00:55:42.000 What am I doing there?
00:55:43.000 I'm so vulnerable.
00:55:44.000 But when you come home and you survived, your soul...
00:55:48.000 Something's happened to your soul.
00:55:49.000 Yeah, I appreciate civilization.
00:55:51.000 See, it's not a...
00:55:52.000 It's not an either-or, is my point.
00:55:54.000 It's not like, man, you gotta live in the woods.
00:55:56.000 That's the only way, man.
00:55:57.000 You gotta be warm with nature.
00:55:58.000 Okay, well, you also should go to a nice restaurant in a city.
00:56:01.000 You should also go see a comedy show.
00:56:03.000 I mean, the very thing that we enjoy most, watching and performing stand-up comedy, is all done with electric lights and a microphone in a completely unnatural environment that's air-conditioned.
00:56:14.000 Yeah, but you're dealing with human beings.
00:56:16.000 You're dealing with heartbeats and sweat and breath.
00:56:19.000 Sure.
00:56:19.000 But you need all this technology, and this is a totally new thing.
00:56:22.000 Right.
00:56:22.000 But it's the most important thing to us, right?
00:56:24.000 This is a new endeavor for humans.
00:56:26.000 Yeah, but don't you feel like if you're totally disconnected from nature and you just live in that city?
00:56:30.000 I know people that don't leave Manhattan.
00:56:32.000 That's not good.
00:56:33.000 They're not healthy people.
00:56:34.000 Yeah, that's not good.
00:56:35.000 No, they're like shaky and weird.
00:56:38.000 Right next to the battery all the time.
00:56:39.000 Yeah, totally.
00:56:41.000 Give it to me!
00:56:42.000 It is not good.
00:56:43.000 I want the biggest condo.
00:56:45.000 Yeah.
00:56:46.000 I'm telling you, one hike, it would fix their head.
00:56:51.000 Or, see, here's the thing. 1.00
00:56:53.000 I think you can be completely healthy being some fucking business person that's out there kicking ass and taking names. 0.99
00:57:00.000 I don't think it's impossible. 0.99
00:57:01.000 No.
00:57:02.000 I don't think it's impossible. 0.91
00:57:03.000 For me to say that someone can't do it and be as fulfilled and happy as these people in the Werner Herzog documentary is ridiculous. 0.68
00:57:13.000 What do I know?
00:57:14.000 People are so different.
00:57:15.000 They vary so much. 0.99
00:57:16.000 And I know people that are fucking miserable when you take them in the woods. 1.00
00:57:20.000 They're like, fuck all this. 1.00
00:57:22.000 Especially people who don't exercise at all. 1.00
00:57:25.000 Have you ever seen a guy that doesn't exercise at all trying to make it up a big steep hill?
00:57:30.000 It is hilarious.
00:57:32.000 Yeah.
00:57:33.000 It's hilarious.
00:57:34.000 Their feet start hurting, their ankles pop.
00:57:37.000 They're basically like sticks surrounded by bags of jello.
00:57:41.000 It really is true.
00:57:42.000 And then they have to move their body up a hill. 1.00
00:57:44.000 They're fucked. 1.00
00:57:45.000 We live on a hill, and they were paving it the other day. 1.00
00:57:48.000 And my office looks out over the street.
00:57:52.000 And I watch people walk their dogs or run.
00:57:55.000 That's why I texted you about hills, which we'll talk about later.
00:58:00.000 So they're paving the street, so everyone had to park down at the bottom of the street.
00:58:03.000 So everyone had to walk to their cars.
00:58:05.000 And I never saw these people.
00:58:07.000 They were coming out like stick people, walking, and then having to go back up the hill. 1.00
00:58:13.000 Miserable. 0.51
00:58:14.000 They don't walk.
00:58:15.000 They never walk.
00:58:16.000 And they're trying to get up the thing like a broken-down robot.
00:58:21.000 Yeah.
00:58:23.000 I mean, some people are injured, for sure, but some people, they just stopped using it, and it started deteriorating.
00:58:28.000 Yeah.
00:58:28.000 And you attribute that to getting older, which is absolutely a factor, but it's more of a factor when you don't exercise.
00:58:35.000 And I sound like some goddamn infomercial. 0.98
00:58:37.000 I know I do. 0.99
00:58:38.000 But I'm being honest. 1.00
00:58:40.000 I'm not talking about do the shit that you do. 0.99
00:58:44.000 Yeah, or anybody that's, like, fucking cross-fitting like that lady in my yoga class who looks like a Greek statue. 1.00
00:58:49.000 No, you don't have to go completely nuts, but you gotta move. 0.99
00:58:52.000 You gotta do something for your body.
00:58:53.000 You gotta do...
00:58:54.000 Just go walk, man.
00:58:55.000 Walk up hills if you can, if you live in a place that has hills.
00:58:58.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:58:58.000 It's fucking giant for you. 0.99
00:58:59.000 And don't... 1.00
00:59:00.000 Bert Kreischer, don't think you're really running when you're running on a treadmill, motherfucker. 1.00
00:59:05.000 I was running yesterday. 1.00
00:59:06.000 I was thinking about that because I just listened to it. 1.00
00:59:08.000 He runs on real shit, too. 1.00
00:59:10.000 I'm just giving him our time. 1.00
00:59:12.000 But he was telling me he was running like seven minute miles. 1.00
00:59:14.000 I'm like, bitch, you weren't going anywhere. 1.00
00:59:15.000 You're in the same room. 1.00
00:59:17.000 That is a crazy thing to say.
00:59:19.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:59:19.000 And getting off and writing jokes.
00:59:21.000 But you're not running seven minute miles on a fucking treadmill. 1.00
00:59:25.000 You're in the same room. 0.99
00:59:27.000 I don't want to hear any of this mile talk.
00:59:29.000 This is crazy.
00:59:30.000 Yeah, and get outside with the sun in your face and the wind blowing on you. 0.99
00:59:34.000 My fucking elliptical told me the other day I went five miles. 0.97
00:59:37.000 I'm like, how did I go five miles? 0.99
00:59:39.000 This isn't even a method of transportation if I got off this thing.
00:59:43.000 You know?
00:59:44.000 Walking around this loopy way.
00:59:47.000 I mean, at least when you're on a treadmill, you're mimicking running.
00:59:50.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:59:51.000 I mean, you're kind of running to keep up with the thing.
00:59:53.000 No, you are.
00:59:54.000 But it's like 60%, maybe 70%, 70% running of what running is, right?
00:59:59.000 It's better than nothing.
01:00:00.000 Yeah.
01:00:00.000 But ellipticals, what is that?
01:00:02.000 You're pulling?
01:00:03.000 I'm pulling?
01:00:04.000 I'm going miles by pulling?
01:00:05.000 I didn't understand what you were saying about...
01:00:08.000 When you texted me that you do the hills for an hour.
01:00:11.000 What does that mean, though?
01:00:12.000 I mean, an hour...
01:00:13.000 That's how long the run takes.
01:00:14.000 It takes about an hour.
01:00:15.000 You're outside for an hour.
01:00:16.000 Yeah.
01:00:17.000 From the time I start.
01:00:18.000 This is my...
01:00:19.000 I've gone further and shorter.
01:00:22.000 And I'll still go shorter if I'm short on time, because the end part of my run that I've been doing pretty regularly is...
01:00:28.000 The last part is a mile, and seven-tenths of that is straight up.
01:00:33.000 Okay. 0.98
01:00:33.000 And it's fucking rough. 0.98
01:00:36.000 Yeah. 0.98
01:00:36.000 And I can... 0.98
01:00:37.000 If I could...
01:00:38.000 Get up it all the way with a really slow steady pace, but I'm way too meathead for that.
01:00:44.000 So I do mad sprints until I can't do it anymore and then I pause and I try to get that pause down to a minute.
01:00:50.000 I get the pause down to a minute where my heartbeat gets to below 140 beats a second and then I charge.
01:00:56.000 So I have spots where I know that I can reach, and then I try to go 20 yards past that spot.
01:01:02.000 The ultimate goal is to be able to sprint all the way up the hill.
01:01:10.000 Gotcha.
01:01:11.000 I have this killer hill, not the one I was just talking about, but going up the other way.
01:01:15.000 It's a killer hill.
01:01:17.000 Paved, but it's killer.
01:01:18.000 And I was thinking I should do, because I'll go run three miles, but, you know, it's a little hilly, but I was thinking, like, if I were to just spend the workout going up and down that hill...
01:01:30.000 It's amazing.
01:01:31.000 But, like, I don't know what would constitute...
01:01:36.000 Too much?
01:01:37.000 Comparable or more than the three miles that I'm running.
01:01:40.000 It'll be way harder.
01:01:42.000 It'll be harder, but do it three times?
01:01:44.000 I would say do it once and see how you feel, and maybe don't even do it that hard.
01:01:51.000 It's hard.
01:01:52.000 I don't take that advice. 0.92
01:01:53.000 I'm a fucking terrible listener to my own advice because I always do too much and then get real sore. 0.95
01:01:57.000 And then I realize, okay, I got to back this off and build up to it. 0.98
01:02:00.000 That was a big thing with me with the running.
01:02:04.000 I tried to go way hard on it real quick.
01:02:06.000 And I also tried to go way hard on it with those five finger shoes.
01:02:09.000 You got to be super careful with those things.
01:02:11.000 Yeah.
01:02:12.000 There's great benefit in those things, but they lost a class action lawsuit, and I should clear this up for a lot of people that have been texting me about this or messaging me or commenting on my Instagram posts about those things.
01:02:24.000 I learned, first of all, I'm not paid by these people.
01:02:28.000 They don't support me in any way.
01:02:30.000 They never spent a dime advertising or a penny advertising this podcast.
01:02:34.000 This is Vibram?
01:02:35.000 Vibram five-finger shoes.
01:02:37.000 Right.
01:02:37.000 I learned about them from Mark Sisson.
01:02:39.000 I learned about them before.
01:02:40.000 Monkey feet.
01:02:41.000 Yeah, those five-finger toe shoes.
01:02:43.000 But Mark Sisson, he's a very well-respected endurance athlete.
01:02:48.000 He was a coach.
01:02:49.000 And now he writes this book, The Primal Blueprint, about healthy diets.
01:02:56.000 And he goes back and forth from keto to real low-sugar, low-carb, very fat-adapted diet.
01:03:04.000 Really very smart, very well-educated guy.
01:03:06.000 What's his name again?
01:03:07.000 Mark Sisson.
01:03:08.000 Sisson.
01:03:08.000 And he was talking about these things, but that's the only things he wears most times he's barefoot.
01:03:13.000 Really?
01:03:14.000 Yeah, he's essentially saying that your feet in shoes, it's like your feet being in a cast.
01:03:18.000 And all those muscles in your feet sort of atrophy.
01:03:21.000 Yeah.
01:03:22.000 And then when you put on those five-finger shoes, those muscles have to work in a way they really don't have to work when they're in a shoe.
01:03:28.000 Yeah.
01:03:28.000 It's much harder for them.
01:03:29.000 Right.
01:03:29.000 So the same exercise that you would do, like the same run, is way harder because your feet are getting a way harder workout.
01:03:37.000 Right.
01:03:37.000 But you have to be careful because if you go too hard, a lot of people get plantar fasciitis, I think that's what I'm saying, which is like really bad pain in the bottom of their foot.
01:03:49.000 Yeah. 0.92
01:03:50.000 The fascia is all fucked up. 0.98
01:03:51.000 Yeah. 0.97
01:03:52.000 It's tearing and the bottom of your foot is in severe agony.
01:03:56.000 I know several people that have got it.
01:03:57.000 Neil Bredding got it.
01:03:58.000 Oh really?
01:03:59.000 From wearing those five finger toe shoes on a treadmill.
01:04:01.000 Neil Bredding got it.
01:04:02.000 Really?
01:04:02.000 And he's light.
01:04:03.000 He's not even like pushing mass.
01:04:05.000 He is.
01:04:06.000 But Neil is a bit of an obsessive person, like in a good way.
01:04:09.000 I think that maybe he got obsessed with running and maybe ran a little too hard with those shoes.
01:04:14.000 You've got to be super careful with those shoes.
01:04:15.000 Build up slow.
01:04:16.000 But once you do build up, you could run in those things.
01:04:20.000 And like, my feet feel so different than they felt like five months ago.
01:04:24.000 Really?
01:04:25.000 Yeah, they're way different.
01:04:26.000 They're way stronger.
01:04:27.000 Way stronger.
01:04:28.000 But do you need strong feet?
01:04:30.000 Well, here's where it's good.
01:04:32.000 What are you doing with these feet?
01:04:34.000 Just walking around, it's easier.
01:04:35.000 Yeah? 0.93
01:04:36.000 Yeah, my ankles are stronger, my feet, because I'm running all this weird, fucked up terrain. 0.88
01:04:40.000 Let me ask you this.
01:04:41.000 When you get up at night to go to the bathroom where you wake up in the morning, I get up and my ankles are like, I'm waking up kind of a thing.
01:04:49.000 Do you still have that?
01:04:50.000 No.
01:04:50.000 No, I don't have any of that.
01:04:51.000 You don't have any of that?
01:04:51.000 Did you before you ran in these shoes?
01:04:53.000 No, not really.
01:04:54.000 I've never really had much ankle pain.
01:04:55.000 If I have, it's very temporary.
01:04:57.000 Just like creaky.
01:04:58.000 No.
01:04:58.000 Like beer can ankles.
01:04:59.000 No, for whatever reason, I never had that.
01:05:01.000 I did so much of my youth kicking things, I think my ankles are pretty strong.
01:05:06.000 Right.
01:05:06.000 Because there's so much.
01:05:07.000 Because when you're throwing kicks, like you think about especially like a side kick or a front kick, there's so much pressure on the ankle.
01:05:15.000 Yeah.
01:05:16.000 You're using them.
01:05:17.000 Yeah, not so much with round kicks because round kicks kind of pull it apart.
01:05:20.000 You hit with a shin.
01:05:21.000 But when you're hitting with the actual foot itself, there's a lot of stress on the ankle.
01:05:26.000 And I think my ankles develop really strong because of that.
01:05:28.000 Right. 0.53
01:05:29.000 So when I run, I feel a big difference in the workout when I run up a straight hill versus I run up like a trail with rocks and shit where I have to jump from one stone to another. 0.92
01:05:42.000 Yeah, navigating your way. 0.95
01:05:43.000 I'll take it with me.
01:05:44.000 I'll go.
01:05:44.000 You should come do it with me one time.
01:05:45.000 I'll do it.
01:05:46.000 Yeah, don't do it with the five-finger shoes.
01:05:47.000 Do it with the regular shoes.
01:05:48.000 And I still alternate.
01:05:49.000 When I need a really hard workout, I alternate.
01:05:52.000 And then I put these on.
01:05:54.000 This is what I like the best.
01:05:55.000 These Salomon trail shoes.
01:05:57.000 Oh, yeah.
01:05:57.000 Yeah, you know why?
01:05:58.000 Because this tread here is the shit. 1.00
01:06:01.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
01:06:02.000 This tread's amazing.
01:06:02.000 You're not going to slide out.
01:06:03.000 Oh, not at all.
01:06:04.000 It's like a dirt bike tire or something.
01:06:07.000 It just grips in the dirt.
01:06:08.000 It's like the best traction.
01:06:11.000 How far, like, a flat run do you go?
01:06:15.000 I don't ever flat run.
01:06:16.000 You don't ever flat.
01:06:16.000 I mean, I run for these little strips.
01:06:19.000 Yeah, because it's exciting.
01:06:21.000 It's so much more fun.
01:06:22.000 And I see where I'm supposed to go.
01:06:24.000 Back to nature, by the way.
01:06:25.000 Yeah, dude.
01:06:26.000 You get excited when you're out there. 0.98
01:06:27.000 I see a person occasionally walking their dog, hanging out, walking the trails and shit. 0.99
01:06:31.000 No, that's great. 0.99
01:06:32.000 But it's mostly just me running these hard-ass hills.
01:06:35.000 There's nothing more fun when you're, like, sprinting.
01:06:38.000 When I was a kid, we'd walk to school through the woods.
01:06:41.000 Yeah.
01:06:41.000 Oh, man, it was just, when you would take off and you're jumping from rock to rock, you know, especially when you know the trail and you know where you've got to jump and slide.
01:06:48.000 Yeah, you're playing.
01:06:49.000 You're having fun.
01:06:50.000 Yeah, that's exactly it.
01:06:51.000 You're playing.
01:06:51.000 I do that when I run to it.
01:06:52.000 You know when I do that when I run?
01:06:53.000 For real?
01:06:57.000 You get high before you run?
01:06:58.000 Yep.
01:06:59.000 Then I'd start thinking I'm having a heart attack.
01:07:03.000 Nope.
01:07:03.000 Nope.
01:07:03.000 You're not having a heart attack.
01:07:04.000 Your heart's just working hard.
01:07:07.000 Bring it in.
01:07:08.000 Really?
01:07:08.000 Just go for that.
01:07:09.000 Yeah, man.
01:07:09.000 First of all, there's been proof that a lot of endurance athletes find great benefit in marijuana.
01:07:15.000 What?
01:07:15.000 Even smoking it.
01:07:16.000 Vaping it in particular.
01:07:17.000 What?
01:07:18.000 Some of them edibles.
01:07:18.000 Yeah.
01:07:19.000 They feel like it dilates your lungs.
01:07:21.000 Uh-huh.
01:07:21.000 Makes your lungs take in more oxygen.
01:07:23.000 Really?
01:07:24.000 And it also makes you more in tune with your body.
01:07:25.000 A lot of weightlifters smoke weed before they lift weights.
01:07:28.000 Really?
01:07:28.000 A lot of weightlifters.
01:07:29.000 More and more now than ever before.
01:07:31.000 I get messages from people all the time. 0.94
01:07:33.000 They'd say, dude, I thought I was a loser.
01:07:35.000 People would say I was a loser for smoking pot before I worked out, but I have some of my best workouts ever.
01:07:39.000 I'm not talking about Get So Blitz where you look at the curl like, how do I know how to move my arm like this?
01:07:44.000 I feel weird.
01:07:45.000 I mean, get just a little high.
01:07:48.000 You feel your muscles.
01:07:49.000 Like yoga, too.
01:07:52.000 Terrence McKenna actually believed that yoga was a guide to how to use hash.
01:07:59.000 He felt like hashish and marijuana.
01:08:04.000 You know, hashish is made from marijuana.
01:08:06.000 Yeah.
01:08:07.000 It's the best.
01:08:07.000 Yeah, hashish is awesome.
01:08:09.000 Yeah.
01:08:09.000 But hash sounds like you're doing heroin to the uneducated, uninitiated.
01:08:14.000 It's just super strong THC, right?
01:08:16.000 Yeah.
01:08:17.000 But the...
01:08:19.000 The feeling that they would get from it is, from yoga, doing it that way is what inspired those moves.
01:08:26.000 He believes that yoga started with people that were smoking hash?
01:08:30.000 He believes that that's where it originated from.
01:08:32.000 When you're high and you start stretching, it feels really good.
01:08:35.000 And these people are notorious users of cannabis and hashish.
01:08:40.000 They smoke...
01:08:41.000 He was saying the dirty secret among sadhus is that really what they're concentrated on is how many chillums can you smoke and still be there?
01:08:49.000 They take pride.
01:08:51.000 What's a chillum?
01:08:51.000 A chillum is like a hit of hash.
01:08:54.000 Oh, that's called a chillum?
01:08:55.000 Yeah.
01:08:55.000 What is the exact...
01:08:57.000 Definition of chillum, because the only people I've ever heard is hash people talk about it, and I don't...
01:09:02.000 Chillum.
01:09:02.000 Chillum.
01:09:03.000 See if you can find that.
01:09:04.000 Because I'm not a...
01:09:05.000 I've only smoked hash a couple of times.
01:09:07.000 Not like a prolific hash user, but in other countries, there's like serious...
01:09:13.000 It's weird because people get busted and they get treated when they get busted with hash like they're smuggling meth or something.
01:09:19.000 Yeah, it sounds more intense.
01:09:21.000 It sounds like a different thing.
01:09:22.000 It's not a dangerous thing.
01:09:23.000 This is the point.
01:09:24.000 No, it's not at all.
01:09:25.000 It's not a deadly thing.
01:09:25.000 No.
01:09:26.000 But it gets classified in those ways.
01:09:28.000 People think of hash as something from...
01:09:30.000 Wasn't that what they got arrested for in the Midnight Express?
01:09:33.000 That's right.
01:09:33.000 That's right.
01:09:34.000 Weed.
01:09:35.000 Yeah, right.
01:09:36.000 Exactly.
01:09:36.000 He's in a Turkish prison for weed.
01:09:37.000 Yeah, here's this dude.
01:09:39.000 Smoking a chillum.
01:09:40.000 Oh boy.
01:09:41.000 Yeah, so that guy clearly gets high. 1.00
01:09:43.000 That guy gets high as fuck. 1.00
01:09:45.000 These guys are so high, they're painting themselves up like superheroes and shit. 1.00
01:09:49.000 He's all dreadlocked. 1.00
01:09:50.000 His face looks like a ghost.
01:09:52.000 So these are sawdus that are smoking chillums. 0.99
01:09:54.000 Crazy beard.
01:09:54.000 So you see the hash there in his pipe.
01:09:56.000 So sawdus...
01:09:58.000 Just get barbecued barbecued high, and they do yoga.
01:10:04.000 Wow.
01:10:05.000 And I noticed it once.
01:10:06.000 It is?
01:10:07.000 Yeah.
01:10:08.000 This was before I was doing yoga regularly, but I had to do this show, and I was particularly nervous because someone I really didn't like was in the audience.
01:10:18.000 Really didn't like?
01:10:19.000 Yeah, really didn't like was in the audience, and some people that were there to see me were in the audience.
01:10:24.000 Cool.
01:10:25.000 Pressure night.
01:10:25.000 Yeah, it was weird.
01:10:27.000 Yeah.
01:10:27.000 Right?
01:10:27.000 So what I did was, I smoked weed, and I got really stretchy, and I started stretching out.
01:10:35.000 And in my stretching, in this severe stretching, this is going to sound super fucking hippie, but I felt a severe sense of forgiveness for this person that I don't like. 0.88
01:10:48.000 And I still don't like him to this day.
01:10:50.000 Yeah.
01:10:50.000 I avoid him at all costs.
01:10:52.000 Yeah.
01:10:52.000 He's not a...
01:10:53.000 A healthy human.
01:10:54.000 Uh-huh.
01:10:55.000 But I felt a severe sense of forgiveness and acceptance.
01:11:02.000 Mm-hmm.
01:11:02.000 And almost like pity.
01:11:04.000 Yeah.
01:11:05.000 No, that's real.
01:11:06.000 And love, too.
01:11:08.000 This weird love thing.
01:11:09.000 I feel bad for the guy.
01:11:10.000 I don't want him in my life because I don't want to manage it.
01:11:13.000 Right.
01:11:14.000 I know what you mean.
01:11:15.000 But when you go into yoga...
01:11:19.000 You could be stressed and balled up, and you could have a work thing rattling in your head, and you could be pissed at somebody.
01:11:26.000 When you come out, it doesn't matter.
01:11:28.000 And there's a thing that seems counterintuitive.
01:11:31.000 Why would stretching make your mind feel better?
01:11:35.000 And so there's all this rationalization, right?
01:11:38.000 Is it endorphins that are being released?
01:11:40.000 Is it just the fact that your body needed exercise?
01:11:45.000 But that's...
01:11:47.000 That's this sort of weird sort of need to dissect things and figure out the one cause.
01:11:54.000 Yeah.
01:11:55.000 The one reason.
01:11:56.000 Right.
01:11:56.000 A minimalist approach or minimalizing.
01:11:58.000 Yeah.
01:11:58.000 You want to understand it.
01:12:00.000 You want to get your head around it.
01:12:01.000 It's all those things.
01:12:02.000 It's the physical thing.
01:12:03.000 It's probably the endorphins.
01:12:05.000 It's the physical release of the muscles which relaxes your body, which relaxes your mind because everything's connected.
01:12:11.000 Right.
01:12:11.000 And it's also the act of stretching, this intense act of stretching and holding positions, it does something for the overall way that your mind interacts with your body.
01:12:21.000 Completely!
01:12:22.000 The tension of your body affects the way your mind works.
01:12:24.000 Time becomes different in a class like that. 0.97
01:12:27.000 It goes by super fucking slow. 0.97
01:12:28.000 My yoga teacher said, at the end of class, she said, yoga's like aspirin. 0.97
01:12:37.000 You may not exactly know why it works, but you know it works.
01:12:41.000 And that's yoga.
01:12:43.000 I don't know what exactly just happened during this hour, but I feel much more at peace when I walk out of there than I did coming in.
01:12:51.000 Yeah, man.
01:12:52.000 100%.
01:12:53.000 For sure.
01:12:53.000 That's a good way to look at it.
01:12:54.000 Yeah.
01:12:54.000 It just works.
01:12:58.000 They talk crazy shit in yoga, though. 1.00
01:13:00.000 No. 1.00
01:13:00.000 This is massaging your descending colon. 1.00
01:13:02.000 No, it's not.
01:13:04.000 You only use 7% of your brain.
01:13:06.000 No, that's not true.
01:13:07.000 That's been disproven.
01:13:08.000 Stop saying that.
01:13:10.000 It took me a long time to find a yoga teacher that wasn't taking me down the...
01:13:16.000 In the weird spots and talking all that stuff.
01:13:19.000 She's just so...
01:13:20.000 Let's just do this.
01:13:21.000 Here's the pose.
01:13:22.000 Correct your arm.
01:13:23.000 Correct that.
01:13:24.000 She doesn't get hippy-dippy. 1.00
01:13:26.000 One ohm, and you're in.
01:13:27.000 It's just awesome enough as it is.
01:13:29.000 And it's not all of them that do this.
01:13:30.000 You know, the place I go to, the chick who runs it, she never does that. 1.00
01:13:33.000 She doesn't say crazy shit. 0.96
01:13:34.000 But she's inspirational, and there's a lot of people in there that are inspirational. 0.99
01:13:38.000 Yeah.
01:13:38.000 And all of their weird styles.
01:13:40.000 Like this one dude that teaches in my class college, freaky tattoos.
01:13:43.000 Got this weird style.
01:13:44.000 Oh, yeah.
01:13:45.000 You know, this other guy is like a boxing fan, and he teaches a killer yoga class.
01:13:50.000 It's a weird thing, man.
01:13:52.000 There's mutations of it, and people start to make it into the sport and do other stuff.
01:13:56.000 Dad, people get a little fired up with that, right?
01:13:58.000 Yeah.
01:13:58.000 Not really into that.
01:13:59.000 You know what I don't like is the dude that takes his shirt off, the big sweaty older dude that takes his shirt off.
01:14:05.000 I mean, it's 90% women. 1.00
01:14:07.000 I just feel like sit in the back, calm down, don't make a scene.
01:14:11.000 Just as a dude, do your thing and get out of there.
01:14:14.000 What do you mean?
01:14:15.000 He's got a big gross ponytail and he takes his shirt off.
01:14:19.000 In your place, dudes don't take their shirt off? 1.00
01:14:21.000 Dudes keep their shirt on in your place? 1.00
01:14:22.000 I keep my shirt on.
01:14:24.000 See, no one in my place keeps their shirt on.
01:14:26.000 No guys.
01:14:26.000 No?
01:14:27.000 Yeah, maybe like one out of like ten.
01:14:29.000 I'm sweating so much.
01:14:31.000 I'm sweating like an animal.
01:14:32.000 It's 105 degrees in there.
01:14:33.000 I don't need...
01:14:34.000 Why would you want a shirt on?
01:14:36.000 I don't do the hot yoga.
01:14:37.000 I don't do Bikram.
01:14:38.000 Oh, that's the difference.
01:14:39.000 I do straight yoga and I'm...
01:14:40.000 Straight?
01:14:41.000 What are you saying? 1.00
01:14:42.000 The shit I do is gay? 1.00
01:14:42.000 I don't do your gay yoga. 1.00
01:14:44.000 What's gay yoga? 0.98
01:14:45.000 No, I'm so sweaty even doing that. 0.74
01:14:48.000 I have to keep a shirt on.
01:14:50.000 My mat will be soaked.
01:14:51.000 Okay, bro.
01:14:52.000 It's disgusting.
01:14:53.000 Don't be scared of a soaked mat.
01:14:55.000 You're there to work out.
01:14:56.000 Yeah.
01:14:56.000 Scared of sweat?
01:14:57.000 No.
01:14:58.000 You know what I'm scared of?
01:14:59.000 I'm scared of...
01:15:00.000 I don't want to offend that little girl who's next to me.
01:15:03.000 Well, she's in yoga class, man. 0.61
01:15:05.000 I know, but I just feel like, do you need me with my half-hairy back next to you?
01:15:09.000 That's you being a comedian.
01:15:11.000 Yeah, you're like, oh, look at me. 0.99
01:15:13.000 I'm so fucking gross. 0.98
01:15:14.000 I keep my clothes on. 0.99
01:15:16.000 I mean, you're probably thinking of material.
01:15:18.000 You find me disgusting? 0.84
01:15:19.000 I find me disgusting. 0.99
01:15:20.000 I want to look at myself in the mirror. 0.92
01:15:22.000 Exactly.
01:15:24.000 It's supposed to be about the act of the movements.
01:15:27.000 I know.
01:15:27.000 When can you do the movements most free?
01:15:29.000 For you, if it's with a shirt on, wear a shirt.
01:15:31.000 I feel like out of kindness, I just keep my shirt on and keep a low profile. 1.00
01:15:36.000 Do you tie a rope around the base of your dick and balls? 1.00
01:15:39.000 Well, yeah. 1.00
01:15:39.000 Everybody does that. 1.00
01:15:41.000 Do you wear yoga pants?
01:15:44.000 Or are you like a board shorts type of guy?
01:15:46.000 No, I have the same shorts that I run in.
01:15:49.000 I dress up like a high school gym coach.
01:15:51.000 Like those sweatpants, old school gray style, go all the way down there.
01:15:57.000 You'd be so hot!
01:15:59.000 Oh my god, if you wear those hot sweatpants in a Bikram's class, man, I should do that one day just to see if I can.
01:16:04.000 Yeah.
01:16:05.000 Dress like a wrestler trying to cut weight.
01:16:06.000 Like a real thick, yeah.
01:16:08.000 Oh, cutting weight's the worst.
01:16:10.000 Those, like, thick-ass, old-school, you know who's making those again?
01:16:14.000 Converse.
01:16:15.000 Converse is making those thick-ass, old-school, gray sweatshirts that don't have any markings on them.
01:16:22.000 Interesting.
01:16:23.000 And they're really high quality.
01:16:24.000 I was like, ooh, this is like minimalist.
01:16:27.000 Yeah, I like that.
01:16:28.000 Yeah.
01:16:29.000 I like that look.
01:16:29.000 I would do that in yoga class.
01:16:30.000 Just fuck all your crazy colors and stripes and shit. 1.00
01:16:33.000 Gray, you're here to sweat. 1.00
01:16:36.000 Why isn't your shirt turned color, Papa?
01:16:38.000 What are you doing?
01:16:39.000 If you're wearing a black shirt, no one knows if you're sweating.
01:16:41.000 You're going to get real close to you.
01:16:42.000 I sweat like an animal.
01:16:43.000 I'm sweating now.
01:16:44.000 I'm in yoga class.
01:16:45.000 I'm going to be sweating like crazy.
01:16:46.000 This is hard work.
01:16:47.000 It is.
01:16:48.000 I love it.
01:16:50.000 But get high and do it?
01:16:52.000 Just try it.
01:16:53.000 I will.
01:16:54.000 I don't know.
01:16:55.000 I don't know.
01:16:55.000 You'll thank me.
01:16:55.000 Alright, I'm gonna try it.
01:16:56.000 Or you'll yell at me.
01:16:58.000 Depending on how much pot you smoke.
01:17:00.000 Joe, I started, and then I started, my heart was racing.
01:17:03.000 I started thinking I was having a heart attack.
01:17:04.000 You know what you need?
01:17:05.000 You need some of the spray.
01:17:07.000 Do we got the spray here, Jamie?
01:17:08.000 Young Jamie?
01:17:15.000 Jamie, I was going to bring you bread today because I made this olive walnut bread and then I forgot.
01:17:22.000 Did you ever make spicy bread?
01:17:25.000 No.
01:17:25.000 Like crushed red pepper or anything in it?
01:17:27.000 No.
01:17:28.000 Is that what you like?
01:17:28.000 I've had pretty good cheddar, crushed red pepper.
01:17:31.000 There's a couple good bread places in Ohio where I'm from.
01:17:33.000 Oh really?
01:17:35.000 You know what I miss?
01:17:37.000 A good pie place that makes a good pot pie. 1.00
01:17:40.000 A pot pie?
01:17:41.000 You don't see a lot of pot pies anymore.
01:17:45.000 Yeah.
01:17:45.000 You know that kind?
01:17:46.000 There's a place in Burbank that does it.
01:17:47.000 Flaky outer crust and the cubes of chicken with that sort of yellow broth with the carrots and the celery in there.
01:17:56.000 It's like Thanksgiving in a cup.
01:17:58.000 Peas.
01:17:58.000 Oh, it's so good.
01:18:00.000 God damn a pot pie. 0.99
01:18:01.000 I'm spacing on the name, but there's a place in Burbank that does it. 0.99
01:18:04.000 Five pot pies to die for.
01:18:06.000 Oh, man. 0.99
01:18:07.000 A pot pie is a damn delicious meal. 0.99
01:18:09.000 It really is. 0.99
01:18:10.000 It makes you so warm inside.
01:18:12.000 Oh, it's like the ultimate comfort food.
01:18:14.000 It really is.
01:18:14.000 It might be, right?
01:18:16.000 But that and a really good meatloaf with mashed potatoes and gravy.
01:18:20.000 Oh, my God. 1.00
01:18:21.000 It's tough to fuck with that, too. 1.00
01:18:23.000 Oh, that's nice. 1.00
01:18:24.000 That's a slightly different dough.
01:18:26.000 Both of those.
01:18:26.000 It's a little flaky.
01:18:27.000 More butter in that dough.
01:18:28.000 Dough extra.
01:18:29.000 When you make the dough for a pot pie, you're using like a whole stick of butter.
01:18:33.000 That's what I'm talking about. 0.94
01:18:35.000 That's why it's so goddamn good. 0.91
01:18:37.000 It's so good. 0.91
01:18:38.000 It's so good.
01:18:39.000 I wish they could make cows, like engineer cows, if they get to this crisper thing, you know?
01:18:46.000 Just please make some cows that don't have a head. 1.00
01:18:49.000 Yeah.
01:18:50.000 Just make some cow and the top of its neck is a computer so we don't have to think about cruelty. 0.99
01:18:55.000 There's no consciousness whatsoever.
01:18:57.000 And just make me a nice butter.
01:18:59.000 A nice grass-fed butter with this headless cow.
01:19:03.000 It would be so much nicer.
01:19:05.000 Open up its neck and just pump grass down there. 0.90
01:19:08.000 Just grind the grass up and then push it in with like a fireplace bellows.
01:19:14.000 Push it in a neck hole. 0.83
01:19:16.000 You get the butter out the other end. 1.00
01:19:17.000 So it has no brain. 0.72
01:19:18.000 It would be so nice.
01:19:19.000 No suffering.
01:19:20.000 How about don't even have it shaped like a cow? 1.00
01:19:21.000 If you're tripping on that?
01:19:22.000 Yeah.
01:19:23.000 Yeah.
01:19:23.000 How about a ball of meat that gives you butter?
01:19:26.000 It's coming.
01:19:27.000 I bet you it's coming. 1.00
01:19:29.000 Just a giant bag of tits. 1.00
01:19:32.000 That's all you need is like the udder. 1.00
01:19:34.000 The computers take care of all the other stuff.
01:19:36.000 Yeah.
01:19:36.000 Right?
01:19:37.000 Just a warehouse filled with tits on a rack. 1.00
01:19:40.000 Yeah, just like they engineer a frame of bones that's shaped like a basket. 0.99
01:19:48.000 And in that basket is like an inner crust.
01:19:50.000 It's like a pot pie.
01:19:51.000 The inner crust of meat.
01:19:53.000 Which is the crust of the pot pie, and then the inside is all tit.
01:19:58.000 That'd be so delightful. 0.99
01:19:59.000 And it's just squishing milk out of that fucker all day long, and it's phenomenal. 1.00
01:20:03.000 And it just exists on a substrate of ground-up grass. 0.99
01:20:07.000 So you have ground-up grass all around the meat outer shell, sort of like the aluminum on a pot pie.
01:20:13.000 You know, you have that aluminum foil around the edge.
01:20:15.000 Yeah, it'd be delightful. 1.00
01:20:16.000 If somebody gives you a pot pie without the aluminum foil around the edge, they can go fuck themselves. 1.00
01:20:20.000 Oh my god, what are they animals? 1.00
01:20:21.000 What are you doing, you monster? 0.99
01:20:22.000 Good lord. 1.00
01:20:23.000 Where did you grow up?
01:20:24.000 I can't even dig my fork underneath it and scoop out the dry underside with the gravy on top.
01:20:31.000 Oh, that little treat at the end, the base?
01:20:33.000 The base crust?
01:20:34.000 Oh yes, the base is a moist crust.
01:20:36.000 It's the moistest crust, right?
01:20:38.000 The best.
01:20:39.000 And then you have a little bit of the top crust too, the crunchy, the outside, the ring.
01:20:43.000 Let's get out of here.
01:20:47.000 Let's go get a room and just order pot pies. 0.93
01:20:49.000 And one of those rooms with that giant bidet with the three hoses. 0.97
01:20:54.000 Party!
01:20:55.000 We're gonna need it after this pot pie. 1.00
01:20:57.000 All those fucking carbs hit us. 0.99
01:20:59.000 When are we going to Musso and Frank's? 0.99
01:21:01.000 Oh, yeah, we gotta do that.
01:21:02.000 We keep talking about it.
01:21:02.000 I know, we do keep doing that.
01:21:03.000 We should do that before a set at the store one night.
01:21:05.000 Yeah, let's do that.
01:21:06.000 That's the move.
01:21:07.000 Like, gentlemen.
01:21:07.000 Yeah.
01:21:08.000 Should we wear suits?
01:21:09.000 Yes!
01:21:10.000 100%.
01:21:11.000 Okay.
01:21:12.000 Can I have the lighter, please?
01:21:13.000 Yeah, I have a suit now.
01:21:16.000 You do?
01:21:16.000 Yeah, I get a suit for a school function for my kid.
01:21:19.000 Oh, really?
01:21:19.000 What do you mean?
01:21:20.000 What kind of function?
01:21:21.000 I always have one that I wear for the UFC. Right.
01:21:26.000 Yeah, but the UFC one stays at the UFC so that I don't have to do anything.
01:21:30.000 Oh, smart.
01:21:30.000 I just go there.
01:21:31.000 That's smart.
01:21:31.000 Sweet kick.
01:21:32.000 I like a nice suit.
01:21:35.000 You just look good.
01:21:35.000 Do you wear a pocket square?
01:21:37.000 Always look good.
01:21:38.000 No, when I hosted this TV show, I did.
01:21:40.000 Yeah, you have to.
01:21:40.000 There was always a pocket square.
01:21:42.000 They made you.
01:21:42.000 Yeah, they made me.
01:21:43.000 They forced that useless piece of cloth right there. 1.00
01:21:45.000 It was a funny...
01:21:46.000 You never know when you need a tourniquet.
01:21:48.000 It was a little pocket square, and Madonna came in to do the show, and the whole building was like electric.
01:21:55.000 It was like, Madonna's coming! 1.00
01:21:57.000 Damn! 0.99
01:21:57.000 And it really was like energy. 0.99
01:21:59.000 Like you could feel energy in the building because Madonna was walking in.
01:22:02.000 Did you call her Madonna?
01:22:03.000 So I came in, yeah.
01:22:04.000 And I was like, I gotta go meet her before the show or I'm gonna be too freaked out.
01:22:07.000 So I just walked into the dressing room and I'm like, hi Madonna, I'm Tom.
01:22:11.000 She's like, nice to see you.
01:22:13.000 And she walks up and she goes, this has got to go.
01:22:16.000 And she took the pocket square out and tossed it.
01:22:21.000 You know why?
01:22:22.000 I was like, that's it, I'm not wearing it.
01:22:23.000 Because Guy Ritchie, her ex-husband, is a proponent of the pocket square.
01:22:27.000 Guy Ritchie was on my podcast talking about the importance of the suit and having a pocket square.
01:22:33.000 That's hilarious.
01:22:34.000 Because she immediately, I just met her two seconds, she whipped it out of my, and tossed it. 1.00
01:22:40.000 There she was.
01:22:42.000 Look at a young Tom Papa.
01:22:44.000 Yeah, look at that. 1.00
01:22:45.000 You slim-faced son of a bitch. 1.00
01:22:46.000 Yeah, look at that. 1.00
01:22:47.000 Mr. I'll steal your girl. 0.99
01:22:48.000 Look at you.
01:22:49.000 Do I look a lot different now?
01:22:52.000 Barbershop top.
01:22:52.000 How different do I look from that shop?
01:22:54.000 You want to be honest or what?
01:22:55.000 Yes.
01:22:56.000 Am I too doughy?
01:22:57.000 You gained a couple pounds.
01:22:59.000 You're making delicious bread.
01:23:01.000 I am.
01:23:02.000 Did Ricky Gervais laugh hard at everything?
01:23:05.000 Uh-huh.
01:23:06.000 That's his move.
01:23:07.000 That's his move.
01:23:08.000 Seems like a jolly fella.
01:23:10.000 Especially when Jerry said it.
01:23:11.000 Yeah, well, it's a good move.
01:23:13.000 Yeah.
01:23:13.000 Always make Jerry think, ah, say it louder!
01:23:19.000 Something about English people, right? 1.00
01:23:21.000 Guy Ritchie was describing with his English accent the suit.
01:23:24.000 I was all in. 0.94
01:23:25.000 I was like, goddammit.
01:23:26.000 Where I stopped, though, is at the pocket square. 0.66
01:23:28.000 I'm like... 1.00
01:23:30.000 I'm not wearing a tie either, motherfucker. 1.00
01:23:32.000 I'm not wearing a tie. 1.00
01:23:32.000 That was the other thing. 1.00
01:23:33.000 He was talking about ties.
01:23:34.000 I'm like, dude.
01:23:35.000 No tie. 1.00
01:23:36.000 Kill somebody with a tie. 1.00
01:23:37.000 Grab ahold of somebody with a tie, you can kill them. 1.00
01:23:39.000 You're broad. 1.00
01:23:40.000 You've got broad shoulders.
01:23:42.000 It's like skinny guys, skinny English dudes with a tie.
01:23:46.000 It's a different thing.
01:23:47.000 Well, the tie problem with me is that some people have choked me too many times.
01:23:51.000 So you feel like someone's getting, it's like that Hedberg joke.
01:23:54.000 I've been choked hundreds of times, like literally. 0.98
01:23:58.000 The average person has been choked, like the average person in the street, if they get choked once or twice in their life, you're like, what the fuck happened? 0.97
01:24:05.000 And the journey from white belt to black belt, I was choked for sure hundreds of times. 0.98
01:24:10.000 Oh my god.
01:24:10.000 I have no idea how many.
01:24:11.000 Really? 0.99
01:24:12.000 Like if you had asked me how many times I have to tap out because someone was choking me, I'd be like, shit, hundreds. 1.00
01:24:18.000 Hundreds of times. 0.98
01:24:19.000 For sure, it has to be, especially in the early days. 0.96
01:24:21.000 God damn it, I got choked all the time. 0.97
01:24:23.000 Really? 0.99
01:24:23.000 All the time! 0.99
01:24:24.000 That's not pleasant.
01:24:25.000 I'd get choked five, six times by one guy.
01:24:28.000 Oh god.
01:24:28.000 Before I moved to the next guy.
01:24:31.000 That's crazy. 1.00
01:24:32.000 So I'm not wearing a fucking tie! 1.00
01:24:34.000 No! 0.99
01:24:35.000 Not doing that top button.
01:24:37.000 I remember how that works.
01:24:38.000 I'm choking myself now.
01:24:39.000 If someone grabs you, if you had to do jujitsu with a tie, that's all anybody would go for.
01:24:43.000 I'm going to tell you the truth.
01:24:44.000 For real.
01:24:45.000 Of course.
01:24:45.000 If everybody had to wear a tie.
01:24:46.000 Say if you do jujitsu, and instead of wearing a belt, everybody has to wear a tie.
01:24:50.000 Or you could take the belt and wrap it around the dude's neck.
01:24:52.000 Say if you started with your black belt tied around your neck.
01:24:56.000 Right.
01:24:56.000 Nobody would go for anything other than the belt.
01:24:59.000 All you have to do is get a hand under that belt, grab it, and twist, and you're out cold.
01:25:04.000 All I have to do is secure some part of your body where it can keep you from moving. 0.99
01:25:09.000 Like in maybe a side mount or a crucifix position, where I trap an arm, and I trap the other arm with my neck, and I'm going to choke the shit out of you. 0.98
01:25:19.000 This isn't happening in your daughter's school function. 0.99
01:25:21.000 No.
01:25:23.000 But I think it should.
01:25:25.000 You mean you could grab someone's belt and knock them?
01:25:28.000 No, no.
01:25:28.000 If someone had a belt around their neck, like Jiu-Jitsu guys, I'm saying Jiu-Jitsu guys were rolling around, the ultimate goal would be to get the belt around the guy's neck.
01:25:36.000 Like if you could do that, that would be the number one thing to do.
01:25:39.000 Right. 0.68
01:25:39.000 And if you already had it knotted around your neck, like that was how you started, the way you knot around your waist, people would kill each other. 0.68
01:25:47.000 They'd immediately grab that rope around your neck and choke you with it. 0.98
01:25:51.000 That would be the ultimate goal.
01:25:52.000 Forget footlocks. 1.00
01:25:53.000 Fuck your footlock. 1.00
01:25:55.000 You've done all the work for me. 1.00
01:25:56.000 Yeah, I'm going to grab that rope around your neck and put you to sleep. 1.00
01:25:58.000 This is crazy. 0.98
01:25:59.000 Because all you'd have to do is twist it.
01:26:02.000 I had to choke my dog out once that way.
01:26:05.000 My dog was attacking a cat.
01:26:07.000 And I got my hand inside his collar and I put him to sleep.
01:26:11.000 Really?
01:26:11.000 Yeah.
01:26:12.000 He just grabbed, I grabbed his collar and I twisted it down and cranked it.
01:26:15.000 I did jujitsu on my dog.
01:26:17.000 Put him right out.
01:26:18.000 It knocked him out?
01:26:19.000 Instantly.
01:26:20.000 Really?
01:26:20.000 Instantly.
01:26:21.000 Yeah, just like it does a person.
01:26:22.000 Holy cow. 0.89
01:26:23.000 Because he wasn't resisting.
01:26:23.000 He didn't know what was going on.
01:26:24.000 Yeah.
01:26:25.000 So I got it in there, grabbed ahold of where the buckle is, and I just cranked.
01:26:28.000 I stepped over him and cranked on it.
01:26:30.000 He just went limp.
01:26:32.000 Wow.
01:26:33.000 Instantly, and the cat took off.
01:26:34.000 I'm going to try that.
01:26:34.000 Dude, it works.
01:26:36.000 That's crazy.
01:26:36.000 Shouldn't do it to dogs.
01:26:38.000 But that's a person, too.
01:26:40.000 The idea is the arteries around your neck that feed your brain.
01:26:43.000 You shut those off like a garden hose.
01:26:45.000 Bink, like you fold a garden hose and then the water stops flowing.
01:26:48.000 That's what happens to your brain.
01:26:50.000 And then you go out.
01:26:51.000 That's why it's not nearly as dangerous as a knockout.
01:26:54.000 Right.
01:26:55.000 Because it's just flow.
01:26:56.000 Yeah, people get confused about that.
01:26:57.000 They think that a concussion and being choked out is the same thing.
01:27:00.000 Still giving me brain damage, bro.
01:27:02.000 It's not.
01:27:03.000 It's not giving me brain damage.
01:27:04.000 It happens to people in class.
01:27:05.000 They go right back to rolling.
01:27:06.000 They don't have no ill effects at all.
01:27:07.000 Really?
01:27:08.000 Yeah, you just go to sleep.
01:27:09.000 You just go right back to it.
01:27:09.000 You wake up and you're like, what happened?
01:27:11.000 Wow.
01:27:12.000 Like, you don't even realize it.
01:27:13.000 Like, what happened? 0.99
01:27:13.000 You're like, oh shit, did I get choked out? 0.99
01:27:14.000 And everybody starts laughing. 1.00
01:27:16.000 Right.
01:27:16.000 Like, if that happens in jiu-jitsu class, people, as long as you're fine, people will start laughing.
01:27:19.000 Because it happens to everybody.
01:27:20.000 Really?
01:27:21.000 Yeah, for sure.
01:27:21.000 If you don't tap, you go to sleep.
01:27:23.000 Everybody does.
01:27:25.000 This sounds fun.
01:27:27.000 It is fun, honestly.
01:27:28.000 Yeah.
01:27:29.000 Until a girl does it to you. 1.00
01:27:31.000 Super humiliating, right?
01:27:32.000 When's the last time you were choked out?
01:27:35.000 By a girl or a guy?
01:27:36.000 By anybody.
01:27:37.000 John Jack Machado tapped me like a few months back.
01:27:40.000 Oh yeah?
01:27:41.000 But he always can.
01:27:42.000 Yeah.
01:27:42.000 I don't think it was a choke.
01:27:43.000 I think it was an armbar.
01:27:44.000 When you roll with someone who's really good, you're going to get caught.
01:27:47.000 Yeah.
01:27:47.000 There's just no way around it.
01:27:49.000 Right.
01:27:49.000 But when a girl does it to you.
01:27:50.000 Duncan was taking some classes.
01:27:51.000 A chick kept choking him out. 1.00
01:27:54.000 Sweet Duncan.
01:27:55.000 Duncan.
01:27:55.000 We've got to work on this.
01:27:57.000 Some people just don't get into it, you know?
01:27:59.000 But for people who don't get into it, I get it.
01:28:02.000 Just get into something else that's hard to do.
01:28:04.000 Just get into something that's hard to do.
01:28:06.000 Would you get high into jujitsu?
01:28:07.000 Oh, yeah.
01:28:08.000 Everybody does.
01:28:09.000 Oh, really?
01:28:09.000 Super popular.
01:28:10.000 Even that?
01:28:11.000 Oh, yeah.
01:28:11.000 Super popular.
01:28:12.000 It makes you better.
01:28:13.000 Really?
01:28:14.000 100%.
01:28:14.000 Why?
01:28:15.000 Because you're more conscious of what you're doing?
01:28:16.000 More tuned into your body, more focused on what you're doing.
01:28:19.000 It provides a type of focus.
01:28:23.000 And it doesn't seem...
01:28:25.000 See, here's the thing.
01:28:26.000 The type of consciousness that you have when you are rolling with a person in jujitsu, when someone's trying to get you and you're trying to defend yourself, that type of feeling that you get...
01:28:36.000 Is very different than any feeling that you get in most of life other than an actual conflict with a person, which is pretty rare.
01:28:43.000 Luckily, we have a nice society, right?
01:28:44.000 Yeah.
01:28:45.000 If you live in a nice neighborhood.
01:28:46.000 Right.
01:28:46.000 But that feeling, for whatever reason, lends itself very well to getting high.
01:28:54.000 Because when you get high, you get into this sort of like not-me state, like an ego-dropped-off state.
01:29:00.000 You know, that's one of the reasons why people get so vulnerable.
01:29:02.000 They feel vulnerable because they don't have that ego anymore.
01:29:06.000 It's a very ego-diminishing substance.
01:29:08.000 It's almost like a medicine for diminishing the ego.
01:29:11.000 Obviously, the effects are different on different people.
01:29:13.000 But that, on top of the focus aspect of it, makes it really attractive to people who do jujitsu.
01:29:22.000 Because you can let go of the bullshit, you're not all tense, and then you can focus on what you're actually trying to do. 0.50
01:29:28.000 And your ego doesn't get in the way. 0.98
01:29:29.000 You see things better.
01:29:30.000 You feel things better.
01:29:32.000 You're more cognizant of how your body works.
01:29:35.000 And some people say that that's a cop-out, and that really you should just get more comfortable with your body, period.
01:29:40.000 And they're probably right.
01:29:42.000 There's probably something to that, too.
01:29:43.000 Is there any elements, like when you get high, where you're just like, it's all cool, it doesn't matter?
01:29:48.000 Because you need an edge to go...
01:29:52.000 Jiu-jitsu is not fighting because you're not hitting each other.
01:29:56.000 Right.
01:29:58.000 So it's more of a...
01:29:59.000 I mean, a boxing match is obviously a fight, but it's not in the new definition.
01:30:04.000 In the new definition, a fight is a mixed martial arts fight.
01:30:08.000 And even then, there's rules that are applied.
01:30:11.000 Right.
01:30:11.000 So there's no eye gouging, there's no ball kicks, there's no hitting to the back of the head.
01:30:16.000 Right.
01:30:16.000 You can't elbow someone to the back of the head, which is...
01:30:20.000 In a way, healthier for the athletes involved, but in another way, more delusional because it removes a very dangerous...
01:30:29.000 Eddie Bravo's always talking about that, that when guys used to take guys' backs in the early days, what they would do instantly is elbow to the back of the head.
01:30:36.000 It didn't matter if you defend the choke or not. 1.00
01:30:39.000 If someone starts smashing the back of your head, you're fucked. 1.00
01:30:41.000 It's a terrible position to be in. 1.00
01:30:43.000 That is removed from MMA. So because that's removed from MMA, You almost have to look at an MMA fight, which is absolutely a fight, as in a way, kind of a match.
01:30:53.000 A mixed martial arts match.
01:30:55.000 Because the rules are so rigid.
01:30:57.000 Much more loose than boxing, but still rigid.
01:31:00.000 So you got a jujitsu match, for sure.
01:31:02.000 Not really a fight.
01:31:03.000 Because you can't get leg kicked, you can't get elbowed in the face, you're not going to get kneed into a coma.
01:31:08.000 It's a totally different experience than a fight.
01:31:10.000 It's almost disrespectful.
01:31:11.000 In some ways to call a jujitsu match a fight.
01:31:15.000 Right.
01:31:16.000 But other people like to refer to it as fight.
01:31:17.000 Yeah.
01:31:17.000 There's nothing wrong with that.
01:31:18.000 Yeah.
01:31:18.000 If you don't know and you're just looking at it from the outside.
01:31:21.000 Boxing match is more like a fight.
01:31:22.000 Right.
01:31:23.000 Right?
01:31:23.000 Because you're hitting each other in this grave danger.
01:31:25.000 Yeah.
01:31:25.000 And you're really trying to kill each other.
01:31:27.000 Right.
01:31:27.000 I mean, you're smashing each other, right?
01:31:28.000 Not trying to kill, but you are using your explosive force on a person, trying to take them out, and it's a very dangerous encounter with severe consequences for your brain.
01:31:40.000 Right.
01:31:40.000 Yeah.
01:31:40.000 That's a fight.
01:31:41.000 Yeah.
01:31:41.000 Yeah.
01:31:41.000 But it's a fight with very limited rules.
01:31:43.000 Yeah.
01:31:44.000 Because like a Muay Thai fighter, a really good Muay Thai fighter, would kill most really good boxers if the boxer didn't know what was going on.
01:31:52.000 Right.
01:31:53.000 Because a really good Muay Thai fighter, it's going to be very hard to hit him to get that close to him, and he's going to start kicking your legs immediately.
01:31:58.000 What's Muay Thai?
01:31:58.000 It's Thai boxing.
01:32:00.000 Okay.
01:32:00.000 Okay.
01:32:01.000 Because they have more weapons.
01:32:02.000 They have legs.
01:32:03.000 They kick the legs a lot.
01:32:04.000 And they'll push you away with their front kick. 0.95
01:32:06.000 There's so much stuff that you're not going to be able to do.
01:32:08.000 A boxer would be way better with his hands.
01:32:10.000 But a Muay Thai fighter is usually pretty good with their hands already.
01:32:13.000 Especially good enough to land a shitload of kicks on you and keep you from getting in range.
01:32:18.000 And if you did get in range, they clinch you and they knee you in the body and they elbow you in the head.
01:32:22.000 It's a way more complete striking system than regular boxing.
01:32:25.000 Right.
01:32:25.000 Do you feel like there's too many rules?
01:32:27.000 Do you feel like it should be just opened up in MMA? Yes and no.
01:32:31.000 And make it real?
01:32:32.000 Yes and no.
01:32:32.000 Because I like specialists.
01:32:34.000 I love that Conor McGregor-Floyd Mayweather fight because it was a real specialist.
01:32:38.000 You got to see a really elite, high-level striker from MMA become almost helpless against a world champion...
01:32:47.000 Probably the best ever boxer.
01:32:49.000 Right.
01:32:49.000 You get to see.
01:32:50.000 Yeah.
01:32:50.000 This is what happens when a specialist fights someone who's really good at something.
01:32:55.000 Yeah.
01:32:55.000 Like me, if I wanted to roll against someone who's like a real high level jujitsu black belt, I would get killed.
01:33:04.000 Right. 0.95
01:33:05.000 But if you got a really good jujitsu black belt from the UFC, they would kill me.
01:33:10.000 But a really good jujitsu black belt from the UFC might get killed by a really good jujitsu world champion.
01:33:15.000 Uh-huh.
01:33:16.000 It's like there's all these levels and levels, and the only way you achieve those levels is a true specialist.
01:33:21.000 Like a true specialist is at such a different level.
01:33:26.000 Like if you watch, you know who Sanchai is?
01:33:29.000 You ever heard of Sanchai from Thailand?
01:33:31.000 He's probably one of the greatest ever combat sports athletes ever, and he fights every couple weeks.
01:33:37.000 I follow him on Instagram.
01:33:39.000 He's 36 years old.
01:33:40.000 He fights people way smaller than him all the time. 0.99
01:33:44.000 Although he knocks a lot of people out, most of his fights are won by him just doing shit to the opponent that they just can't deal with. 0.99
01:33:52.000 He just kicks the shit out of them. 0.99
01:33:53.000 He hits them when they're not looking. 1.00
01:33:55.000 They don't know what he's doing.
01:33:56.000 He's so clever and fast.
01:33:58.000 I mean, he's just a wizard, a technical wizard inside the ring.
01:34:02.000 And when you watch him, you realize, like, oh, well, there's levels even to this thing.
01:34:07.000 Right.
01:34:07.000 Like, this guy is such a specialist.
01:34:09.000 Yeah.
01:34:10.000 That anybody outside of that, like, if Floyd Mayweather wanted to fight Sanchai, you let Sanchai kick him, it would be one of the most lopsided fights you've ever seen.
01:34:19.000 It would be horrific to watch.
01:34:20.000 Watching a world-class boxer just getting exposed.
01:34:23.000 Just legs kicked out from under him, kicked in the face, legs kicked out from under him, knee in the face, elbowed in the head.
01:34:29.000 Well, don't you think McGregor, if he was allowed to do his thing?
01:34:32.000 Oh, for sure.
01:34:32.000 Right?
01:34:33.000 For sure.
01:34:33.000 But meanwhile, Sanchai could probably do that to McGregor.
01:34:36.000 Right.
01:34:36.000 There's levels and levels.
01:34:38.000 When McGregor encountered with Floyd Mayweather, he would encounter in Thai boxing with a fantastic, one of the greatest ever, and a guy like Sanchai.
01:34:48.000 So it sounds like the rules actually make it more interesting.
01:34:51.000 They do make it more interesting.
01:34:52.000 Because you have to become, right?
01:34:52.000 So the only way you find out who the really best jiu-jitsu guy is, you have to have them only compete in jiu-jitsu.
01:34:57.000 Right.
01:34:58.000 Because with striking, there's all this other stuff involved.
01:35:00.000 You hurt people with punches and knees.
01:35:03.000 But when you want to look at a complete system, a complete system, mixed martial arts is as close as it comes without the elbows to the head and the kicks to the head on a down fighter and the stomps and the knees to the head on a down fighter.
01:35:15.000 Right. 0.99
01:35:15.000 And then the really dirty shit, like eyeball pokes and makes the balls and stuff like that. 0.99
01:35:19.000 So it's always going to be a match. 1.00
01:35:21.000 Right.
01:35:21.000 You can't bite someone's nose off.
01:35:23.000 It's always going to be a match.
01:35:24.000 Right.
01:35:24.000 Right.
01:35:24.000 You know what I mean?
01:35:25.000 It's not like a fight like animals.
01:35:27.000 Yeah.
01:35:28.000 But you still call it a fight.
01:35:30.000 Right.
01:35:31.000 So how many hills do I have to run to get back into my old shape? 0.99
01:35:37.000 Well, I think it's this whole fucking goddamn delicious bread you're making. 0.99
01:35:41.000 That's an issue. 0.99
01:35:42.000 It's so good.
01:35:43.000 It's so good.
01:35:44.000 That's the problem.
01:35:45.000 You know what happened?
01:35:46.000 I visited this woman in Ojai who's really good baker. 0.95
01:35:51.000 Kate's breads.
01:35:52.000 Oh, you're visiting bakers. 0.98
01:35:53.000 Yeah, she's amazing. 1.00
01:35:55.000 And I saw what flour she had.
01:35:58.000 I'm like, oh, I gotta get that flour.
01:36:00.000 I gotta get this flour.
01:36:02.000 So I looked up online where she gets the flour.
01:36:04.000 It comes from Utah.
01:36:05.000 Whoa.
01:36:06.000 And the smallest you can get is a 50-pound bag.
01:36:09.000 So I have two 50-pound bags of wheat and artisan all-purpose flour in my kitchen.
01:36:16.000 And I was thinking, if you were to eat 50 pounds of flour, you would be a big fatso.
01:36:24.000 Dude.
01:36:25.000 But the flour makes such a difference.
01:36:27.000 Huge difference.
01:36:28.000 You know what I discovered recently?
01:36:30.000 What?
01:36:31.000 Is a double zero wheat pasta from Italy?
01:36:35.000 Double zero, yeah, yeah.
01:36:36.000 You do know.
01:36:37.000 Yeah.
01:36:37.000 I see most folks don't.
01:36:38.000 Yeah.
01:36:38.000 Now, double zero is what you use for pizza dough.
01:36:41.000 Yeah.
01:36:42.000 The good stuff, right?
01:36:43.000 Good stuff.
01:36:43.000 And I also found out about heirloom wheat.
01:36:47.000 Heirloom wheat.
01:36:48.000 Yeah.
01:36:49.000 That most of what we're getting here in the United States of good old America is wheat that has been, people love that term GMO, right?
01:36:57.000 It scares the shit out of people.
01:36:58.000 I don't eat GMOs.
01:37:00.000 Right.
01:37:00.000 Super organic.
01:37:01.000 Yeah.
01:37:02.000 All good thoughts.
01:37:03.000 But the reality is, most of the wheat we have, according to, you know, Maynard Keenan from Tool?
01:37:08.000 Mm-hmm.
01:37:09.000 The singer?
01:37:10.000 Yeah, the singer.
01:37:10.000 He also owns this great vineyard.
01:37:14.000 Right, right, yeah.
01:37:15.000 In a restaurant.
01:37:16.000 Oh, yeah?
01:37:17.000 So he's explaining to me, he explained it on the podcast.
01:37:20.000 Right.
01:37:20.000 About the differences between the wheat we have today and the original wheat.
01:37:24.000 Yeah.
01:37:25.000 The wheat we have today has much more complex glutens in it, and it's a larger yield for the same area.
01:37:31.000 Right.
01:37:31.000 So when they would grow the old wheat, they didn't make as much of it, but it was easier for a person to digest.
01:37:36.000 Right.
01:37:37.000 So that's what it is.
01:37:37.000 Interesting.
01:37:38.000 Yeah.
01:37:39.000 Yeah, there's so many of these little farmers, and some are pretty big for being little, but compared to what these giant things are, that really concentrate on...
01:37:52.000 Growing the wheat the way that it used to be grown.
01:37:54.000 Yeah, you have to have the heirloom seeds though, right?
01:37:57.000 Yeah, and it makes such a difference.
01:38:00.000 I was like, how big of a difference can it be just in making the bread that I'm making?
01:38:05.000 Huge!
01:38:06.000 I would imagine, right?
01:38:07.000 It tastes like natural.
01:38:08.000 It's alive.
01:38:09.000 Yeah, it's earthy, it's deep, it's really good.
01:38:13.000 Earthy.
01:38:14.000 Earthy's good.
01:38:16.000 No, it made a big difference, but now I gotta figure out how I'm gonna store 50 pounds of...
01:38:19.000 100 pounds of flour.
01:38:20.000 You probably have to do it in a controlled environment, no?
01:38:23.000 I gotta...
01:38:23.000 Does it go bad?
01:38:24.000 Uh, you gotta just put it in, like, barrels.
01:38:27.000 Does it have to be dry and airtight or something like that?
01:38:30.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:38:30.000 But it's good for a long time when you do it that way?
01:38:32.000 Yeah.
01:38:33.000 Yeah.
01:38:33.000 And I'm still learning and cranking out a lot and giving it away and stuff.
01:38:38.000 So I'm going through a lot and won't sit forever.
01:38:41.000 The way it's been described to me, the difference is between the difference of a tomato that you get in a grocery store today, even a good one, in comparison to an heirloom tomato.
01:38:50.000 Makes perfect sense.
01:38:51.000 Yeah, that those tomatoes that we have today, like Neil deGrasse Tyson did a speech about this where someone was asking him, not a speech, but an answer to a question.
01:38:59.000 I think it might have been in one of those talks that he does, those town hall talks.
01:39:03.000 And someone was asking him about GMOs.
01:39:06.000 And he said, virtually everything that we eat has been modified.
01:39:10.000 Everything, from the oranges to the corn.
01:39:13.000 Like, you wouldn't want to go back to the original corn.
01:39:16.000 It wouldn't taste good.
01:39:17.000 There wouldn't be a lot of yield to it.
01:39:19.000 But then the real problem is, the corn that we have today, not that easy for us to digest.
01:39:24.000 Right.
01:39:25.000 And not that good to eat a lot of it.
01:39:27.000 You know, it's all like, how much of it do you use?
01:39:30.000 Yeah.
01:39:31.000 But when you do eat a tomato, like an heirloom tomato, you get a farmer's market that this guy grew in this tiny little farm and just happens to have them that week.
01:39:39.000 Phenomenal.
01:39:40.000 Phenomenal!
01:39:40.000 But I don't think that's the same with corn.
01:39:42.000 No. 0.99
01:39:43.000 I think that golden sweet corn that we have today that tastes like candy, that's the best shit that's ever existed. 0.99
01:39:48.000 That's pretty good. 0.99
01:39:50.000 You know, you put butter on that, wrap it in aluminum foil, put it on the grill. 1.00
01:39:54.000 Shut the fuck up with your bullshit ass, original pine cone looking corn. 1.00
01:39:59.000 Your hard-ass corn. 1.00
01:40:00.000 That stupid corn. 1.00
01:40:02.000 People would hang that stupid corn on their door on Thanksgiving. 1.00
01:40:06.000 Remember that? 1.00
01:40:06.000 Yeah, the Indian corn. 1.00
01:40:08.000 What the fuck is up with that unedible, bullshit-ass, multiracial corn? 1.00
01:40:14.000 Scaring children away at Halloween. 1.00
01:40:16.000 Yeah, it's like a...
01:40:17.000 It's weird, colored, and it's like, what are you?
01:40:20.000 I don't know, man. 1.00
01:40:21.000 I'm all kinds of shit. 1.00
01:40:22.000 Yeah, just try and eat me if you can. 1.00
01:40:25.000 That was the original corn, but it wasn't even that.
01:40:27.000 That's like getting exaggerated.
01:40:29.000 Yeah, that's the corn people put.
01:40:31.000 Wait, what is that?
01:40:32.000 Why do you got corn all over your house? 0.57
01:40:33.000 It's spooky corn.
01:40:35.000 Children of the corn!
01:40:37.000 Corn!
01:40:38.000 That's some spooky corn right there.
01:40:40.000 Have you ever seen the original corn?
01:40:41.000 See if you can find original corn plant images.
01:40:45.000 And I still want to know how much tobacco rollers get paid.
01:40:48.000 I couldn't find much.
01:40:49.000 The only thing I found was an article about a guy that just started a business and it said somewhere in there that as cheap as they could be made was like 30 cents a piece and it was as expensive as $5 a piece for the cigar itself.
01:41:01.000 That included A highly skilled rapper to do it.
01:41:06.000 Oh.
01:41:07.000 I don't know if it might be being paid per...
01:41:09.000 Per cigar they roll?
01:41:10.000 50 cents per if they're doing a bunch in a row.
01:41:12.000 It didn't say exactly.
01:41:14.000 Whoever rolled this did a great job.
01:41:15.000 They did a fantastic job.
01:41:16.000 Easy draw.
01:41:18.000 Easy draw.
01:41:19.000 It's lasting a nice long time.
01:41:21.000 There's a great podcast, if you're into cigars, where Ari Shafir sat down with Robert Kelly, they smoked cigars, and Bobby Kelly's a...
01:41:28.000 Is that what it really looked like? 1.00
01:41:29.000 Bobby Kelly is a crazy fucking cigar smoker. 1.00
01:41:31.000 He's gone crazy with the cigars. 1.00
01:41:33.000 Look at that.
01:41:33.000 Look at the original corn looked like.
01:41:35.000 Like bullshit. 1.00
01:41:36.000 What? 1.00
01:41:37.000 Yeah.
01:41:37.000 That's the original corn.
01:41:39.000 Ew.
01:41:39.000 See the size of a quarter?
01:41:41.000 Yeah.
01:41:41.000 And then look at the quarter with that.
01:41:42.000 Wow, that's crazy.
01:41:44.000 The original corn versus the new corn.
01:41:46.000 Wow, that's wild.
01:41:47.000 Barely recognizable.
01:41:48.000 Wild. 1.00
01:41:49.000 And that shit was all done through, like, splicing, right? 1.00
01:41:53.000 Right. 1.00
01:41:53.000 That was natural. 1.00
01:41:54.000 Look at the fucking corn! 1.00
01:41:55.000 Look what corn used to look like. 1.00
01:41:56.000 That's weird.
01:41:56.000 It looks like the root that came out of your toilet.
01:42:00.000 Too small.
01:42:02.000 Yeah.
01:42:03.000 The big modern corn looks like the root.
01:42:06.000 That's crazy, right?
01:42:07.000 I mean, corn used to be this tiny little low-yield product.
01:42:10.000 Whoa, that's jelly bean corn.
01:42:13.000 That's amazing.
01:42:14.000 Glass jam corn.
01:42:15.000 Glass jam corn. 1.00
01:42:16.000 I bet that tastes like shit. 1.00
01:42:18.000 Yeah, that's terrible. 1.00
01:42:19.000 That can't be good.
01:42:21.000 No.
01:42:21.000 Otherwise, people would eat it, right?
01:42:23.000 Yeah.
01:42:24.000 You ever get cotton candy grapes?
01:42:25.000 What is that?
01:42:26.000 What is that, Jamie?
01:42:28.000 Black waxy corn.
01:42:29.000 What?
01:42:30.000 Black waxy corn.
01:42:31.000 Wow, that looks amazing.
01:42:32.000 That looks pretty good.
01:42:33.000 That looks like licorice.
01:42:35.000 Like, you would bite into it.
01:42:36.000 That looks cool.
01:42:37.000 I would eat that.
01:42:38.000 I would eat that, too.
01:42:39.000 I would think that, like, if you went over a clever person's house, they would serve you that black corn.
01:42:43.000 You'd be like, ooh.
01:42:44.000 It made this experience even better.
01:42:46.000 Where do those purple potatoes come from? 0.96
01:42:47.000 Peru, right?
01:42:49.000 That's probably the same area as this, I think.
01:42:51.000 Is it?
01:42:51.000 Peruvian purple potatoes, isn't that?
01:42:53.000 Ooh, look at that one.
01:42:54.000 That's crazy.
01:42:55.000 That looks like, you know, the alien from the Geiger? 1.00
01:42:57.000 It's dick. 0.99
01:42:59.000 Go back to that. 1.00
01:43:02.000 The tongue comes out and it fucks you at the same time. 1.00
01:43:05.000 It jabs you in the head with that, and then it shoots the baby into your body. 1.00
01:43:11.000 That thing. 0.97
01:43:12.000 Then you're just sitting there eating dinner like nothing's wrong. 0.99
01:43:14.000 Spore grows out of your dead body. 0.98
01:43:17.000 I can't believe that... 0.91
01:43:20.000 That the corn didn't...
01:43:21.000 I think between the original corn being that weird knobby thing and the corn that we have year round, I think there's probably an era in there where the corn tasted better.
01:43:33.000 Right, like the life of the taiga.
01:43:34.000 That's the evolution of human beings to technological superiority where we're at today.
01:43:40.000 You gotta meet it halfway.
01:43:41.000 That's the sweet spot.
01:43:42.000 Yeah, the sweet spot.
01:43:44.000 There's no stopping it.
01:43:46.000 There's no stopping it.
01:43:47.000 We're moving forward.
01:43:48.000 There's no stopping it.
01:43:49.000 But maybe this spot is not the sweet spot. 0.97
01:43:51.000 Just like living in a cave wasn't the fucking sweet spot, right? 0.90
01:43:55.000 It was just a sweet spot for the time. 0.99
01:43:57.000 Yeah.
01:43:57.000 Right?
01:43:58.000 No.
01:43:58.000 You don't want to go live on the taiga.
01:44:01.000 No.
01:44:01.000 Tom Pomplum.
01:44:02.000 I can't.
01:44:02.000 You can't.
01:44:03.000 No.
01:44:03.000 I'd be exhausted.
01:44:04.000 How are you going to bake your bread?
01:44:05.000 How am I going to bake my bread?
01:44:06.000 Exactly.
01:44:07.000 Where are you going to get your flour?
01:44:07.000 Are you going to have to grow it?
01:44:08.000 Oh my god.
01:44:09.000 You got to mill your own bread? 1.00
01:44:10.000 Do you imagine if you had to grow your own fucking wheat to make your bread? 1.00
01:44:13.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:44:14.000 I would never make bread.
01:44:16.000 Would you though?
01:44:17.000 I probably would.
01:44:18.000 Maybe I'll plant the seed right now.
01:44:20.000 Maybe you're going to leave here. 1.00
01:44:21.000 You're going to be driving home in your electric car and you're going to be thinking, hey, why the fuck all this comedy bullshit? 0.98
01:44:27.000 What I need to do is get a big piece of land and start growing my own wheat and then chopping it down and making my own bread and have Tom Papa's Bread Restaurant. 0.99
01:44:36.000 I have given this a lot of thought.
01:44:40.000 I have.
01:44:41.000 Have you really?
01:44:42.000 There's something so, not about throwing it all away, but there's something about going bigger and deeper into it.
01:44:50.000 It kind of just draws you in.
01:44:52.000 I'm not even making decisions.
01:44:54.000 There's just like, now I'm getting bigger things of flour.
01:45:00.000 Yeah, there's something very all-consuming about it.
01:45:06.000 It's good.
01:45:07.000 You know, whenever you get something that's rewarding, and I like that it's small.
01:45:11.000 I like that there's no bullshit around it.
01:45:14.000 There's no phone calls to be made.
01:45:16.000 It's just all on my own terms.
01:45:18.000 It's in my control.
01:45:19.000 Does that appeal to you as an overall life, or does it appeal to you as a vacation from the current life that you enjoy, which is very hectic and kind of stressful, writing material, performing, traveling?
01:45:32.000 Yeah.
01:45:32.000 You know what?
01:45:33.000 I feel like...
01:45:35.000 I don't know.
01:45:36.000 It's an interesting question.
01:45:37.000 I do feel like the process of making it and doing it matches up with writing really well.
01:45:45.000 When I'm at home and I'm writing a lot and in between taking breaks and going and tending to the bread and then coming back to the writing, that back and forth is very satisfying.
01:45:56.000 Nice.
01:45:57.000 It is the best.
01:45:58.000 That's nice.
01:45:59.000 Yeah.
01:46:00.000 Yeah, I often thought writing, in some ways, releases you from the stress that a lot of people find of performing.
01:46:06.000 They're just writing.
01:46:07.000 Yeah, I heard Norm MacDonald say that on his show, that he just wants to write books.
01:46:13.000 He just wants to write books.
01:46:15.000 I've heard that before, where people just want to go internal and stop being a performer.
01:46:19.000 I know, but I feel like...
01:46:22.000 I couldn't do that 100%.
01:46:24.000 I really love it.
01:46:26.000 My book's going to come out next year.
01:46:27.000 Oh, it's a plug.
01:46:28.000 I see what you did. 1.00
01:46:29.000 Son of a bitch. 1.00
01:46:30.000 You can't even buy it yet. 1.00
01:46:31.000 But it is coming out soon.
01:46:33.000 You're planting seeds.
01:46:35.000 Planting seeds.
01:46:36.000 Planting seeds for people to buy the book.
01:46:37.000 I see what you're doing.
01:46:38.000 Yeah.
01:46:38.000 It's not yet.
01:46:39.000 It's not like I'm plugging my gig at comics at Mohegan Sun or anything.
01:46:42.000 Whoa, you're there?
01:46:43.000 When is that?
01:46:44.000 It's coming up next week.
01:46:46.000 Oh, interesting.
01:46:47.000 No, I feel like when I was writing the book, I got very deep into it.
01:46:51.000 I love coming in with my coffee in the morning and going to work for hours just in there tinkering with it, playing with it.
01:46:57.000 It was very satisfying.
01:46:59.000 Makes sense.
01:47:00.000 Grounding.
01:47:05.000 Start getting itchy.
01:47:06.000 You get itchy.
01:47:07.000 It's not who I am.
01:47:08.000 Do you think that it's that you've experienced these jolts of fun that you get from stand-up and that you become addicted to these jolts of fun and then seeing the happiness in people's faces when they're laughing?
01:47:22.000 Yeah, that relating to people, that isolation of writing is...
01:47:27.000 Okay, but until I can take that idea out, share it with other human beings, that's what I'm built for.
01:47:37.000 Yeah.
01:47:38.000 Well, you've designed yourself that way.
01:47:41.000 Sort of like, look at the human race.
01:47:43.000 We've grown to this place where if you made people like...
01:47:47.000 Were you here during the heat wave?
01:47:50.000 Yeah.
01:47:51.000 Got weird, right?
01:47:52.000 Yeah.
01:47:52.000 It was intense.
01:47:54.000 It got intense.
01:47:55.000 It was a little spooky.
01:47:55.000 It was.
01:47:56.000 Yeah, because, like, really...
01:47:58.000 People were on edge.
01:47:59.000 Yeah.
01:48:00.000 Quietly on edge.
01:48:01.000 Waiting for the AC to go.
01:48:03.000 Right?
01:48:03.000 If the AC goes, then how are we going to deal with this?
01:48:05.000 Yeah.
01:48:06.000 Because this is not...
01:48:07.000 You'd have to just get in the shower all day.
01:48:09.000 Yeah.
01:48:10.000 No, it's intense.
01:48:10.000 When it's like 110, you can stay in the shade and you'll stay reasonably cool, but it's way hotter than you want it to be.
01:48:18.000 Yes.
01:48:18.000 You're not sleeping right.
01:48:19.000 No.
01:48:20.000 No. 0.99
01:48:20.000 Sweating like a pig. 0.99
01:48:21.000 Yeah. 0.97
01:48:22.000 Like the people in Florida right now, there's a lot of people that don't have power.
01:48:27.000 Yeah, and it's humid. 0.99
01:48:28.000 Hot as fuck. 0.99
01:48:29.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:48:30.000 Fans blowing.
01:48:31.000 No, it's not good.
01:48:32.000 You know that feeling where you're like, oh.
01:48:34.000 I've always thought, no disrespect, people from Florida, but that's one of the reasons why people think of people that live in the South as being dull. 0.99
01:48:42.000 Because I think for the longest time, before they invented air conditioning, those fucking people didn't have time to think deep. 0.99
01:48:51.000 Or move quickly. 1.00
01:48:53.000 You're not gonna think your best thoughts when you're fucking sweating like a pig and you're exhausted all the time. 0.99
01:48:57.000 Why getting the power back on in Florida could take weeks. 0.99
01:49:00.000 Oh, Jesus Christ. 1.00
01:49:02.000 Fuck that. 1.00
01:49:06.000 That's rough. 1.00
01:49:07.000 It is rough.
01:49:07.000 Weeks.
01:49:08.000 That's rough.
01:49:09.000 Why'd you bring up the weather?
01:49:11.000 I was here during the heat wave.
01:49:13.000 Because it was so evident to me during that time that we really can't even exist in this environment without the way we do and enjoy the way we live without the modern conveniences of the electrical grid and air conditioning units and the delivery of food and all this shit that we just get super accustomed to.
01:49:34.000 So we think...
01:49:37.000 Now, of life without that stuff as being impossible.
01:49:40.000 But at one point in time, we were adapted. 0.95
01:49:42.000 At one point in time, life without that, like those fucking people that live in the taiga, the worst it gets for them is it gets crazy cold, they bundle up, and they go inside and they burn wood. 0.97
01:49:51.000 They have a whole system built in to survive that environment. 0.96
01:49:55.000 For us, that would be unthinkable.
01:49:58.000 Your house doesn't have central AC? You don't have heat?
01:50:02.000 You don't have a thermostat?
01:50:03.000 Wait a minute.
01:50:03.000 Wait.
01:50:04.000 Hold on.
01:50:05.000 So you walk in your house, that thing doesn't glow on the wall and show you the temperature when you walk by it?
01:50:10.000 Right, exactly.
01:50:11.000 Yeah, it's not programmed or it just kind of knows I'm home.
01:50:14.000 Yeah, a friend of mine's house, you walk towards his thermostat and it lights up.
01:50:19.000 It senses you.
01:50:20.000 It senses you're there.
01:50:21.000 Right.
01:50:22.000 You're like, hey.
01:50:23.000 Yeah.
01:50:23.000 It shows you the temperature.
01:50:24.000 Like, it's off and you'll step away and it'll dim up and then you stand right in front of it and it lights up and you're like, this is freaky.
01:50:29.000 Yeah, it's pretty nice.
01:50:30.000 These people don't have that, man.
01:50:31.000 They have windows they shut.
01:50:33.000 Yeah.
01:50:33.000 Yeah.
01:50:34.000 Fire.
01:50:35.000 Fire keeps the heat in.
01:50:36.000 Yeah.
01:50:36.000 Like, bundle up.
01:50:37.000 No, I couldn't.
01:50:38.000 Put animal skins on.
01:50:40.000 Yeah.
01:50:41.000 Yeah.
01:50:41.000 That's what people do.
01:50:42.000 No, I'm not doing that.
01:50:43.000 Yeah.
01:50:44.000 I'm not.
01:50:44.000 No.
01:50:45.000 So we've adapted, for sure, to this.
01:50:47.000 You and I have adapted to this.
01:50:48.000 The question is, who's happier?
01:50:51.000 What's it better?
01:50:52.000 Is it better?
01:50:52.000 I'm pretty happy.
01:50:53.000 When I walk in after that heat wave and I would walk into my house, you take your shoes off and you put that bare feet on that cold tile, I'm pretty happy.
01:51:03.000 Happier than the tiger guy.
01:51:05.000 Yeah, watch TV, all these hurricanes brewing in the Gulf.
01:51:09.000 But I found that...
01:51:12.000 That writing is very...
01:51:14.000 As I was writing, I was reading a lot of writers and stuff, and it's very isolating.
01:51:20.000 The more you write, the more you are shutting out the world.
01:51:24.000 The more you are...
01:51:25.000 It's a hermit's life. 1.00
01:51:26.000 It is.
01:51:27.000 It really is.
01:51:27.000 In a way.
01:51:28.000 It's not a...
01:51:30.000 You are very much within your own head and eating up a lot of time just being by yourself.
01:51:36.000 It can be rewarding for sure, but if you were to write all the time like that, it's pretty isolating.
01:51:44.000 Well, it's also...
01:51:46.000 In a lot of ways, almost like a mental marathon, because you're on this one thing for a long time.
01:51:52.000 You're sitting there staring at this thing, and you're writing, and you're thinking about it, and you're focusing on it, and then you're going back at it, and you're thinking about it, and you're focusing on it.
01:52:00.000 It becomes a part of your daily thoughts, even when you're not doing it sometimes.
01:52:04.000 What was really remarkable was, you know, when you're writing your stand-up, you know, it's like in blocks.
01:52:10.000 It's like, you know, chunks.
01:52:12.000 And I was thinking, how am I going to keep track of, like, a whole book?
01:52:16.000 But your subconscious really does.
01:52:18.000 Like, I know exactly where things are.
01:52:20.000 I would glide through it and know.
01:52:23.000 I think I have to change this part and see on my notes.
01:52:25.000 Yes, indeed, that is where I was going to change it.
01:52:28.000 It is your brain starts to...
01:52:32.000 Take in all that information and treat it like chunks.
01:52:35.000 You know what I mean?
01:52:36.000 It's no different, really, than writing your stand-up.
01:52:39.000 Do you take notes, like chapter-to-chapter notes?
01:52:43.000 Like you have a notebook that you have sitting on the side, and you say, chapter one, here's all the things that I like or don't like.
01:52:50.000 Not that specifically, but if there's something that I can't wrestle to the ground, and I'm like, I gotta fix that ending, I'll just write on the side pad, page 35, ending.
01:52:59.000 And then keep going.
01:53:01.000 And you writing, like, what's the subject of the book?
01:53:05.000 It's funny essays about family life.
01:53:08.000 Okay, so it's all just different...
01:53:10.000 Different chapters about everybody in your family.
01:53:12.000 Your parents, your kids, your uncles, cousins.
01:53:15.000 Everything that makes up family.
01:53:19.000 So it's all these little...
01:53:21.000 You know, it's like 300 pages and each one is probably four pages, five pages.
01:53:27.000 You know what I mean?
01:53:28.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:53:29.000 How long have you been working on it?
01:53:32.000 A little over a year.
01:53:33.000 Ooh.
01:53:34.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:53:34.000 Damn. 1.00
01:53:35.000 And it's like this week it goes back and I don't get it back. 0.99
01:53:38.000 Ooh, this is it?
01:53:39.000 Yeah, this is it.
01:53:40.000 How does that feel?
01:53:41.000 Great.
01:53:42.000 Yeah?
01:53:42.000 Yeah.
01:53:43.000 You done?
01:53:44.000 Yeah, I'm done.
01:53:44.000 Got it.
01:53:45.000 Not like sick of it.
01:53:46.000 No.
01:53:46.000 But pretty proud of parts of it, but every time you look at it, you're like, ugh, how did I let that go?
01:53:50.000 This is terrible.
01:53:51.000 This is so corny.
01:53:52.000 How did I let that joke in?
01:53:55.000 Do you find that sometimes you have an idea that you're not getting out totally, but you leave it as is as a placeholder, and you review it later?
01:54:03.000 Yeah. 0.98
01:54:03.000 Like, maybe you feel like there's something in this idea, but whatever I have right now is shit. 0.98
01:54:07.000 Yeah. 0.95
01:54:08.000 But maybe there's something, if I just, like, leave it there like that, maybe I'll come at it from a different angle, but at least then I know to think about this one subject that I thought had some promise.
01:54:15.000 Yes, 100%.
01:54:17.000 Yeah.
01:54:17.000 100%.
01:54:18.000 And I really feel like...
01:54:20.000 It kind of taught me how much your subconscious goes to work on it without you being conscious.
01:54:27.000 Like you don't realize that your brain is actually going to work on this.
01:54:32.000 When you shut the computer and walk away and you think that's it, your brain is still going at it without you even being aware that it's happening.
01:54:41.000 You ever read Stephen King on writing?
01:54:43.000 Yeah.
01:54:43.000 It's a great book.
01:54:44.000 It's a great book.
01:54:45.000 One of the things I thought was the most shocking was that he doesn't really have a whole outline of his stories before he starts writing them.
01:54:54.000 It's crazy.
01:54:55.000 He just has an idea.
01:54:56.000 And just go.
01:54:57.000 Yeah.
01:54:58.000 Which is brilliant. 0.94
01:54:59.000 It's fucking amazing. 0.96
01:55:00.000 You gotta trust yourself. 0.99
01:55:03.000 I mean, he's a brilliant mind.
01:55:05.000 You know, when I was a kid, his books were thought of as fluff.
01:55:08.000 But if you read Stephen King, you weren't really reading.
01:55:12.000 Yeah, well, that happens when you're really popular.
01:55:15.000 It was a little bit of that.
01:55:17.000 Right.
01:55:17.000 But it was also that, oh, you're just reading monster stories.
01:55:20.000 It's so stupid. 1.00
01:55:22.000 You should be reading about depressed heroin users. 1.00
01:55:24.000 Then you'd be like, things would be deep.
01:55:26.000 Yeah, middle age crisis in Europe.
01:55:28.000 Hey man, this is Alphabet City in the 1960s.
01:55:31.000 These people were doing smack. 0.67
01:55:32.000 Yeah.
01:55:33.000 They were listening to Lou Reed and punching each other.
01:55:35.000 That guy, I mean, you ever go to a bookstore and look at the Stephen King section in a bookstore?
01:55:41.000 It's insane.
01:55:41.000 It's a whole part of the store.
01:55:44.000 This guy just cranks it out.
01:55:46.000 Yeah.
01:55:47.000 Amazing.
01:55:48.000 There's definitely eras, though.
01:55:51.000 You know what I feel like?
01:55:52.000 I feel like there's drugs and no drugs, Stephen King.
01:55:55.000 Uh-huh.
01:55:56.000 And drug Stephen King is The Shining, Carrie, Cujo.
01:55:59.000 Dead Zone.
01:56:00.000 Dead Zone. 1.00
01:56:01.000 All the crazy shit. 1.00
01:56:02.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:56:03.000 All the like dark, weird, twisted, no inhibition whatsoever.
01:56:07.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:56:08.000 Shit. 1.00
01:56:09.000 And then he's like more content now and probably a healthier person. 1.00
01:56:14.000 Uh-huh. 0.99
01:56:14.000 The stories aren't quite as fucked up as it. 0.99
01:56:17.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:56:17.000 It was fucked up. 1.00
01:56:18.000 But there's that one, Mr. Mercedes, that newer, one of the newer ones. 0.99
01:56:22.000 Oh, he's still got it in him, for sure.
01:56:24.000 Dark. 0.73
01:56:25.000 Oh, for sure.
01:56:25.000 Dark.
01:56:26.000 Well, it's not just dark.
01:56:27.000 Like, if you go back and read Carrie, it's not just dark.
01:56:31.000 It's like the psychological profile of this poor, tormented young girl with telekinetic powers.
01:56:37.000 Mm-hmm. 1.00
01:56:38.000 Fucking fantastic. 0.99
01:56:39.000 He just nailed it. 0.99
01:56:40.000 Oh my god. 0.86
01:56:41.000 To the point where you want her to make those kids' heads explode. 1.00
01:56:44.000 You want her to cause accidents. 1.00
01:56:45.000 Go get them, girl. 1.00
01:56:47.000 Fuck these assholes. 1.00
01:56:48.000 Like, finally, the tormented and picked on girl has an option. 1.00
01:56:52.000 Yeah.
01:56:52.000 I mean, he made it perfect.
01:56:54.000 He really created, like, the ultimate outsider. 1.00
01:56:57.000 Some poor kid that was unfortunate to be born into a situation where her mother was a completely psychotic cunt. 1.00
01:57:02.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:57:03.000 And people were trying to fucking throw a pig's blood on her and run her over with a car. 1.00
01:57:07.000 Oh, so mean. 1.00
01:57:08.000 Yeah, but she and she they faked that this fucking handsome guy was gonna go to the prom with her, just to get dumped blood on her. 1.00
01:57:15.000 They all thought it was funny. 0.99
01:57:15.000 They were laughing at her. 0.99
01:57:17.000 And she got back at them all because we realized that at the worst case scenario for a human is someone that could do that to some poor, misfortunate girl like Carrie. 0.99
01:57:28.000 Yeah.
01:57:28.000 So we show, like, without killing her, Right.
01:57:31.000 These are the worst people that you could imagine. 1.00
01:57:33.000 And she had this fucking ace in the hole. 1.00
01:57:36.000 This power. 1.00
01:57:38.000 That they never saw coming.
01:57:39.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:57:40.000 It's fucking great. 0.98
01:57:41.000 It's so great. 0.99
01:57:42.000 He's amazing. 1.00
01:57:43.000 Fuck, he's good. 1.00
01:57:44.000 Amazing. 1.00
01:57:45.000 But I remember people telling me, like, that's all fluff.
01:57:47.000 I'd be like...
01:57:49.000 Pet Sematary? 1.00
01:57:50.000 Motherfucker, you ever read that book? 1.00
01:57:51.000 Shining is not fluff. 1.00
01:57:53.000 It's not fluff.
01:57:54.000 It's not fluff.
01:57:55.000 No. 0.99
01:57:55.000 The book is fucking fantastic. 0.99
01:57:57.000 Oh my god. 0.99
01:57:58.000 And the book, that guy goes crazy slow.
01:58:00.000 Yeah.
01:58:00.000 It takes a while.
01:58:01.000 That's what he didn't like about the original Jack Nicholson version, the Kubrick version, which was fantastic.
01:58:07.000 Yeah.
01:58:07.000 But it was a different story.
01:58:09.000 I can see the argument that that story was more adaptable to a film that takes place over, you know, two plus hours or whatever.
01:58:15.000 Uh-huh.
01:58:16.000 Whereas his book...
01:58:17.000 It would have to be like a 30-hour movie.
01:58:19.000 Yeah.
01:58:19.000 You know, I mean, it's a long process of Jack, maybe 30 hours would even be enough.
01:58:24.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:58:24.000 Yeah, when he really starts going nuts and the family realizes he's actually losing his fucking mind and being taken over by something that lives in this house. 0.99
01:58:33.000 Yeah, by this demon. 1.00
01:58:35.000 It's good.
01:58:36.000 He felt like Jack Nicholson, I think, if I remember correctly, his criticism of Jack Nicholson seemed crazy immediately.
01:58:44.000 Oh, really? 0.81
01:58:45.000 He was already crazy. 0.69
01:58:45.000 Uh-huh. 0.69
01:58:46.000 Like, he had hurt the kid once when he was drinking, when he was fucked up. 0.96
01:58:50.000 I don't know if that was in the book. 0.87
01:58:51.000 I don't remember.
01:58:51.000 Yeah.
01:58:52.000 But that Jack Nicholson's character was too crazy right away.
01:58:56.000 Right.
01:58:56.000 There wasn't enough of a transition.
01:58:58.000 That's just Jack.
01:58:59.000 He was ready to give in.
01:59:00.000 It's just Jack.
01:59:01.000 It's just Jack.
01:59:02.000 The one thing I took away from his book on writing was just get to the end.
01:59:10.000 Don't share it.
01:59:10.000 Don't talk about it.
01:59:11.000 Just keep going.
01:59:12.000 Get to the end.
01:59:14.000 Don't judge it yourself.
01:59:16.000 Just get to the end and then start going to work on it.
01:59:19.000 And that really was helpful, getting to the end of this.
01:59:24.000 And then it actually became really fun going back.
01:59:27.000 Fixing it up.
01:59:28.000 Fixing it up.
01:59:29.000 And even, like, just the clarity.
01:59:31.000 Like, just make it simple.
01:59:32.000 Just make it...
01:59:33.000 get this message across.
01:59:35.000 Like, why am I taking three paragraphs, repeating myself, pare it down, peel it off?
01:59:42.000 Make it clear for the reader.
01:59:45.000 He didn't want to go in circles.
01:59:46.000 Make this very...
01:59:47.000 Like, a lot of times, I'll read articles, like, in the paper or something, and it's like, I'm not understanding it.
01:59:53.000 It's not that I'm not understanding it.
01:59:55.000 It's that this isn't written well.
01:59:56.000 This isn't clear.
01:59:58.000 That's your job.
01:59:59.000 Like, just going back and trying to clear.
02:00:01.000 I mean, like, sometimes when you have a bit, and you're, like, you're working on new stuff for your stand-up, and...
02:00:07.000 You have something, it's like this big chunk.
02:00:09.000 And when you're done working on it, it's down to like five lines.
02:00:13.000 Because you learned how to say it so effectively, so direct.
02:00:17.000 Yeah, and you realize the parts are just, you were enjoying them, but they were tripping you up the whole bit.
02:00:22.000 Right, they were getting in the way.
02:00:23.000 They were like, you're asking the audience to think about this, why?
02:00:26.000 It's just getting in the way.
02:00:27.000 It's just confusing the clarity of the original thought.
02:00:31.000 You know, Ari has this piece of paper that he has glued to the top of his keyboard that's a Hemingway quote. 0.99
02:00:36.000 It says, the first draft of everything is shit. 0.99
02:00:39.000 Oh, nice. 0.99
02:00:40.000 Yeah.
02:00:40.000 It's great.
02:00:41.000 It takes the pressure off.
02:00:42.000 Well, it's also real.
02:00:43.000 Yeah.
02:00:43.000 It's like really, really just get it out there and don't think that it's done.
02:00:46.000 And Hemingway writing.
02:00:47.000 Yeah.
02:00:48.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:00:48.000 His first draft was shit, so my little stuff is gonna end up shit. 1.00
02:00:53.000 But like Stephen King, Hemingway was fucked up all the time. 1.00
02:00:57.000 Like Stephen King's early days. 0.98
02:00:59.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:00:59.000 Was Stephen King really fucked up? 0.99
02:01:00.000 Oh, yeah. 0.99
02:01:01.000 Oh, he was?
02:01:01.000 Don't you remember the book?
02:01:03.000 No.
02:01:03.000 Oh, my God.
02:01:04.000 I don't remember that part.
02:01:05.000 Yeah, dude. 0.70
02:01:06.000 I mean, he was just drinking cases of Budweiser and fucking doing coke, and he said he didn't even remember writing Carrie. 0.73
02:01:14.000 Yeah. 0.97
02:01:14.000 What? 0.97
02:01:15.000 Yeah, I didn't even remember it.
02:01:16.000 No.
02:01:17.000 It all came in a haze.
02:01:18.000 Or is it Cujo?
02:01:19.000 Holy cow. 0.89
02:01:20.000 Carrie or Cujo?
02:01:21.000 I think Cujo.
02:01:21.000 Oh, Cujo was great.
02:01:22.000 I think he didn't remember writing Cujo.
02:01:23.000 I think he was in a...
02:01:24.000 I don't know.
02:01:25.000 I might be wrong.
02:01:26.000 It might be Carrie. 0.96
02:01:27.000 But just he was that messed up.
02:01:29.000 One of those books.
02:01:29.000 What is it?
02:01:30.000 Cujo?
02:01:30.000 Thank you.
02:01:31.000 Wow.
02:01:31.000 So...
02:01:32.000 To be so blasted that he didn't even remember writing one of the great horror books ever.
02:01:37.000 Oh my god.
02:01:38.000 And a horror book about a rabid dog, a giant rabid dog that used to be everybody's friend.
02:01:43.000 So scary.
02:01:44.000 I read that as a kid, like in a summer, and just you were in that car with that kid, with the mom, just like, oh my god.
02:01:53.000 His just slobber on the window next to you.
02:01:57.000 Dude.
02:01:58.000 So he was that messed up.
02:01:59.000 Yeah.
02:02:00.000 Self-admittedly.
02:02:01.000 Yeah, I mean, he was doing everything.
02:02:03.000 When did he get clean?
02:02:04.000 Years back.
02:02:05.000 I think his wife put the hammer down. 0.99
02:02:07.000 Yeah, they gave his family and friends stage an intervention.
02:02:12.000 Yeah.
02:02:12.000 Right around that time.
02:02:14.000 Oh, yeah.
02:02:14.000 What year?
02:02:14.000 Got that bad.
02:02:15.000 Doesn't say?
02:02:16.000 Doesn't say.
02:02:17.000 Let's see.
02:02:17.000 Late 80s, I guess.
02:02:18.000 Yeah, see, so I don't want to say that he couldn't have written amazing stuff without drugs.
02:02:23.000 No.
02:02:24.000 But the original stuff that he did, he was... 0.73
02:02:28.000 I mean, was it that he was just fucked up and he was writing amazing stuff? 0.99
02:02:32.000 Or was it that he was writing amazing stuff because he was fucked up? 0.99
02:02:36.000 Clearly it has an effect on your mind. 0.98
02:02:38.000 And your mind is where all your creativity, allegedly, is coming from, right?
02:02:43.000 I mean, you're writing and you're concentrating the way you're thinking about things directly affects the work.
02:02:48.000 So if you're thinking about things on coke and drinking, and you get this psychotic overview of life on earth and the interactions that people have with each other, and this is how you're writing, influenced by these drugs has a giant effect on creativity.
02:03:02.000 Sure, but...
02:03:04.000 Without talent to harness it and, you know, if you don't have that talent that he has, you can get just fucked up and then just you don't do anything with it.
02:03:15.000 But sit in your room, you know, but he it's there's like real talent there.
02:03:20.000 Yeah, that then the drugs influence that it's manipulating that giant talent.
02:03:25.000 I mean, I think you could also say the same about a lot of great comics, like Kinison and Pryor.
02:03:29.000 Obviously, they had a great relationship, bad relationship, with some drugs.
02:03:33.000 Yeah. 0.98
02:03:34.000 But they were also fucking super talented on top of that. 0.98
02:03:37.000 For sure. 0.98
02:03:38.000 Yeah.
02:03:38.000 It's a fascinating thought, right?
02:03:40.000 It's like, what are your thoughts?
02:03:42.000 And where are these coming from?
02:03:44.000 Are they coming from the environment that you live in, the things you've been exposed to, the pros and the cons, the goods and the bads?
02:03:52.000 You ever hear, I mean, sure you have, but I'll ask it anyway, but you ever hear singers, songwriters talk about where the songs come from?
02:04:02.000 Yeah, they all have a different approach.
02:04:04.000 Yeah, but a lot of times they talk about catching them out of the air.
02:04:08.000 Yeah.
02:04:08.000 That they didn't come from me.
02:04:11.000 They all have this overwhelming feeling like it came from somewhere else.
02:04:16.000 Yeah.
02:04:16.000 What do you make of that?
02:04:17.000 For sure.
02:04:18.000 I think, you know, Steven Pinker calls it the muse.
02:04:21.000 He uses the expression the muse or the, you know, the idea of the muse.
02:04:26.000 And even if it's not like a real muse, like some sort of a guardian thing, but treat it like it is.
02:04:33.000 Right.
02:04:33.000 And that with respect, like show up to work and that muse will show up more often.
02:04:37.000 Right.
02:04:37.000 Like tune it in and have it come to you.
02:04:39.000 But I think it goes back to what we're saying about...
02:04:42.000 Ego and like getting out of your own way like sometimes when you're writing you're so immersed in these thoughts and these ideas that you are out of your own way Yeah that tunnel yeah think then the booze and the coke and the weed or whatever the fuck you're doing helps you stay in that crazy zone of Just letting these ideas sort of create themselves in your mind and letting the story play itself out in your brain But how much of it is from within your brain and how much is it in the ether?
02:05:07.000 It's a good question.
02:05:08.000 What does that mean?
02:05:10.000 Yeah, what does that mean?
02:05:11.000 What does that mean, floating around in the ether?
02:05:13.000 Yeah.
02:05:13.000 And you just being a thing where it can kind of show up.
02:05:16.000 Yeah.
02:05:17.000 You know, is it just harnessing us?
02:05:19.000 I mean, because whenever you talk about meditating or even the yoga or the jujitsu, all that stuff we're talking about, it is a relationship to the universe.
02:05:29.000 Right.
02:05:29.000 Right?
02:05:29.000 It is a relationship to these...
02:05:32.000 Forces that are outside of ourself.
02:05:35.000 Yeah.
02:05:35.000 It's interesting.
02:05:37.000 It is.
02:05:38.000 And it's probably...
02:05:40.000 I mean, every human being is a combination of so many different experiences and genes and environment and the culture they live in.
02:05:49.000 I mean, there's so many different factors that would affect your creativity, too.
02:05:52.000 There's so many different factors that would affect the way unique ideas enter into your head.
02:05:59.000 Yeah.
02:06:00.000 And why.
02:06:00.000 And, you know, how much respect do you pay to those ideas?
02:06:03.000 How much time do you spend alone with those ideas?
02:06:05.000 Right.
02:06:06.000 Can you focus on a lot of different things?
02:06:08.000 Like if you were writing, can you focus on your act and another project?
02:06:13.000 No.
02:06:13.000 It's hard, right?
02:06:14.000 No, I'm not good at that.
02:06:15.000 I've tried that.
02:06:16.000 I don't do so well at that.
02:06:18.000 I write different things, but if I have a main project...
02:06:22.000 If I'm trying to do a special or something like that, the main project has always got to be the stand-up.
02:06:27.000 Right.
02:06:28.000 And then all these other things that I write are just fishing for more stand-up.
02:06:31.000 Right.
02:06:31.000 So I don't...
02:06:33.000 A lot of times I don't write, like, try to sit down and write a specific joke.
02:06:38.000 Yeah.
02:06:39.000 I get a joke and then I write on the joke.
02:06:41.000 But I get a joke from writing blogs more.
02:06:44.000 Uh-huh.
02:06:45.000 Like, almost like essays.
02:06:46.000 So I'll start thinking about a subject.
02:06:48.000 And this way I'm not restricted to a punchline format.
02:06:51.000 Uh-huh.
02:06:51.000 I'm just trying to, like, explore all the different things that I think about this.
02:06:55.000 Of an idea.
02:06:56.000 And I might find one or two gems in there.
02:06:58.000 Right.
02:06:58.000 And then I extract those and I go, okay, how do I get that gem?
02:07:01.000 Right.
02:07:01.000 And turn it into...
02:07:03.000 I know there's a thought there that makes sense, but how do I do that without all that other bullshit? 0.97
02:07:07.000 How do I get to it quick?
02:07:09.000 I really think that great stand-up is like poetry because it's all paring you down to this one simple way to deliver all of that thing in that blog.
02:07:17.000 Yeah.
02:07:17.000 Right?
02:07:18.000 That's why tweets are so good.
02:07:19.000 You know, Ian Edwards was telling me about that, about writing tweets and writing little Facebook posts, having it real limited.
02:07:28.000 He would just sit there and try to write really funny shit on Twitter and it forces you to boil it down to 140 characters. 0.71
02:07:36.000 Yeah, it's a skill. 0.99
02:07:37.000 Yeah, it is.
02:07:38.000 It's a definite, like, you learn how to have, like, a quickly impacting thought.
02:07:44.000 Yeah.
02:07:44.000 As opposed to, like, some long...
02:07:46.000 Like, you ever read...
02:07:47.000 I mean, I'm guilty of it, too. 1.00
02:07:49.000 I've written some stuff like that, but that long, drawn-out, stupid shit that could have been, like, parsed down. 0.99
02:07:56.000 And it's almost like, come on, man. 0.99
02:07:57.000 Don't put this out there yet.
02:07:59.000 This is the first draft.
02:08:00.000 Yeah, right.
02:08:01.000 Oh, my God.
02:08:02.000 Yeah.
02:08:02.000 The world is filled with those specials right now.
02:08:04.000 Yeah.
02:08:05.000 Those specials, those articles, and so much of that.
02:08:10.000 Just kind of hanging out.
02:08:11.000 Yeah.
02:08:13.000 It's an interesting thing.
02:08:15.000 But I really do...
02:08:16.000 I did like the...
02:08:18.000 The process of having to write.
02:08:21.000 You know what I mean?
02:08:22.000 Like, knowing that someone out there is waiting for it.
02:08:25.000 Like, I've got to hand this thing in.
02:08:27.000 It was kind of, it was pretty cool.
02:08:29.000 That's why people like doing specials, too.
02:08:31.000 Because you know that, like, hey, I have to film this thing in six months, so I have, you know, X amount of work to do.
02:08:36.000 I've got to get it done.
02:08:37.000 Right.
02:08:37.000 Like, as opposed to, if you don't have a...
02:08:40.000 Hanging out.
02:08:40.000 Yeah, just doing sets.
02:08:41.000 Right.
02:08:42.000 Like, how much you're writing.
02:08:42.000 I'm writing a little.
02:08:43.000 Yeah, I'm doing anything.
02:08:44.000 You realize that same new joke is six months old?
02:08:47.000 Yeah, or a year old, or two years old, or five years old.
02:08:50.000 I mean, how many guys do you know like that?
02:08:52.000 Yeah.
02:08:53.000 But there's so much comfort in the port, you know?
02:08:56.000 You're already in port, you don't want to go back out to that ocean of ideas.
02:08:59.000 Right, exactly.
02:09:00.000 It's nice and safe.
02:09:01.000 I built a house over here.
02:09:01.000 Yeah.
02:09:02.000 I've been working on this house for years.
02:09:03.000 Come on, I gotta go out again? 1.00
02:09:05.000 Fuck that. 1.00
02:09:06.000 I got this act. 1.00
02:09:07.000 I got it nice and honed.
02:09:09.000 It's good.
02:09:10.000 What do you mean this hurricane's coming?
02:09:12.000 It's going to knock down my beachside house and I got to rebuild?
02:09:15.000 I can't possibly.
02:09:16.000 I can't do that.
02:09:17.000 Look, I can't grow.
02:09:18.000 I'm 70 years old.
02:09:19.000 There's no learning.
02:09:20.000 Yeah.
02:09:21.000 It's over.
02:09:22.000 I'm done.
02:09:22.000 You are what you are.
02:09:24.000 I'm done, man.
02:09:25.000 You are what you are.
02:09:27.000 So, can we talk about what you did yesterday?
02:09:30.000 Sure.
02:09:31.000 You sent me a pretty cool picture.
02:09:33.000 Oh, the elk?
02:09:34.000 Oh my god.
02:09:35.000 Holy cow. 0.89
02:09:36.000 I try to do that once a year.
02:09:37.000 That was massive.
02:09:39.000 Yeah, it's huge.
02:09:40.000 Big animal.
02:09:41.000 How big?
02:09:41.000 Wild elk.
02:09:43.000 Thousand pounds, probably.
02:09:44.000 Jeez.
02:09:45.000 It's a big animal.
02:09:46.000 Oh my god.
02:09:47.000 Yeah.
02:09:48.000 And how long did it just come, were you set up in one spot and it kind of crossed your path?
02:09:53.000 It was a couple of days of trying to get close to one.
02:09:55.000 A couple days?
02:09:56.000 Yeah.
02:09:57.000 That's really quick.
02:09:59.000 Wow.
02:09:59.000 Usually it's a lot more days, but you know, you're obviously, sometimes you'll have encounters with an elk, like your very first morning.
02:10:06.000 Right.
02:10:07.000 There's a picture of it.
02:10:08.000 The rack on that is amazing.
02:10:10.000 It's a big animal.
02:10:11.000 That is huge rack.
02:10:13.000 Yeah, that's one of the most, I think, majestic of all wild animals.
02:10:18.000 That is amazing.
02:10:19.000 I mean, that is a mountain of an animal.
02:10:21.000 These animals get killed so often by mountain lions, like mountain lions in particular.
02:10:30.000 Yeah.
02:10:31.000 How old is he, you think?
02:10:32.000 Bears.
02:10:33.000 I don't know.
02:10:34.000 I mean, that's a big rack.
02:10:35.000 How long did it take to grow that rack?
02:10:37.000 You know what's really crazy?
02:10:38.000 They drop them off every year and they regrow them quick.
02:10:41.000 Every year?
02:10:42.000 Yep.
02:10:42.000 So that grows that quickly?
02:10:44.000 Within a couple months.
02:10:45.000 Oh my god, really?
02:10:46.000 Yeah, it's insane.
02:10:47.000 It's like one of the quickest growing things in nature.
02:10:50.000 I would think that was around for 20 years.
02:10:53.000 No, no, no.
02:10:53.000 They drop those off every year.
02:10:55.000 Oh, my God.
02:10:56.000 And that's where you can tell very specific, like, there's very specific characteristics of certain antlers, and you can tell, like, by the sheds if it's the same antler if you catch them, like, a year later.
02:11:08.000 Man, oh man.
02:11:09.000 One arrow?
02:11:10.000 One arrow.
02:11:11.000 Really?
02:11:12.000 What do you aim for?
02:11:13.000 The lungs, like the vitals, the lungs, the heart.
02:11:17.000 Right.
02:11:17.000 It kills them, like the lungs get deflated and they die quick.
02:11:20.000 He fell within five seconds.
02:11:23.000 Really?
02:11:24.000 Yeah.
02:11:24.000 From an arrow?
02:11:25.000 Yeah, and then it takes a few seconds for them to expire.
02:11:27.000 Oh my god.
02:11:27.000 But never knew we were there.
02:11:28.000 He had no idea we were there.
02:11:30.000 So how long were you in that spot?
02:11:32.000 Well, we were trying to get to him for a couple hours.
02:11:35.000 Uh-huh.
02:11:36.000 Because he was screaming.
02:11:37.000 They scream when they're trying to get laid.
02:11:39.000 They're trying to pick up chicks. 1.00
02:11:40.000 Oh, really?
02:11:41.000 They fight each other to the death.
02:11:42.000 We find dead ones there.
02:11:44.000 Really?
02:11:44.000 Yeah, you find them all the time.
02:11:46.000 They fight?
02:11:47.000 One of them they found, though, had a mountain lion's claw stuck in its head, which is really crazy.
02:11:52.000 Really?
02:11:53.000 Yeah, they found this one that had been...
02:11:56.000 Chew it up.
02:11:57.000 And when they, you know, like when I think one of them dies, they want to find out like what killed them.
02:12:04.000 And I think you bring the skull to like fish and game and they, you know, do an examination on whatever they can.
02:12:11.000 To see what's going on out in the wild.
02:12:12.000 To see if it was poached.
02:12:13.000 You know, sometimes people will shoot an animal and then they're not supposed to be there. 1.00
02:12:18.000 People are assholes, man. 1.00
02:12:20.000 Like, Ted Nugent has a place in... 1.00
02:12:22.000 Some people are, obviously.
02:12:23.000 Ted Nugent has a place in Michigan.
02:12:25.000 And it's this big, giant, fenced-in deer park that he has.
02:12:31.000 Like, hundreds of acres.
02:12:33.000 And one day, while he was not there, someone killed, like, all of his bucks.
02:12:37.000 So they climbed the fence and just shot them all.
02:12:39.000 And just shot them and left them? 0.99
02:12:41.000 Yeah, just shot them. 1.00
02:12:41.000 Oh my god. 1.00
02:12:42.000 Yeah, people have done terrible things like that.
02:12:44.000 So I think there's one, they have to think about that.
02:12:47.000 They find a dead one.
02:12:48.000 And also they have to think about what's killing it.
02:12:50.000 Is it a bear that's killing it?
02:12:52.000 Right.
02:12:52.000 Not that usual.
02:12:53.000 They're pretty big for a grown bear to attack that.
02:12:56.000 A bear and an elk would be a crazy fight.
02:12:58.000 There's no bear in America.
02:12:59.000 Or there's no grizzlies in California, rather.
02:13:02.000 Right.
02:13:02.000 But they do get jacked by grizzlies in Wyoming.
02:13:06.000 Really?
02:13:06.000 Especially their babies.
02:13:07.000 Almost all their babies.
02:13:09.000 Would a grizzly fight it for food or just to protect itself?
02:13:13.000 No, for food.
02:13:14.000 Oh, yeah?
02:13:14.000 Yeah, you don't have to protect yourself from an elk.
02:13:17.000 Right.
02:13:17.000 You have to protect yourself from a moose.
02:13:19.000 Moose will try to fuck you up. 1.00
02:13:21.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:13:21.000 It's a different animal. 1.00
02:13:22.000 Right.
02:13:22.000 Because they evolve around grizzly bears all the time.
02:13:25.000 They're up in Alaska.
02:13:26.000 Right.
02:13:27.000 And there's certain parts of America they are, too.
02:13:29.000 I ran into one in Denver.
02:13:31.000 Colorado.
02:13:31.000 Colorado, yeah.
02:13:31.000 Yeah, you can find them in Colorado.
02:13:32.000 They're in Wyoming.
02:13:34.000 I think I told you that story.
02:13:35.000 I came around a trail.
02:13:37.000 We were backcountry for a couple weeks, and we just came around this trail, and it was a baby moose, like, in the middle of the trail.
02:13:45.000 Wow.
02:13:45.000 We were like, oh, it's so cute.
02:13:47.000 It was like... 0.99
02:13:49.000 He just heard, oh shit, it's mom's gotta be around here. 0.99
02:13:52.000 Yeah, we got out of there really quick. 0.99
02:13:54.000 A friend of mine has a ranch in British Columbia, and he was on his horse, and he got too close to the baby, so the mother moose started chasing him at full clip.
02:14:02.000 Oh man. 0.98
02:14:02.000 He said it was fucking terrifying. 0.98
02:14:05.000 Yeah. 0.98
02:14:05.000 Because the moose is so much bigger than his horse. 0.98
02:14:07.000 Gigantic.
02:14:08.000 Oh, he was on a horse?
02:14:09.000 He was on a horse.
02:14:09.000 Holy.
02:14:10.000 And he's just hoping that the horse can get away from this fucking moose. 1.00
02:14:13.000 Oh my. 1.00
02:14:13.000 This moose is sprinting at them. 1.00
02:14:15.000 God. 0.97
02:14:15.000 And the moose will knock you off the horse and stomp you to death. 0.97
02:14:19.000 Geez.
02:14:20.000 Yeah.
02:14:20.000 Oh my god.
02:14:21.000 Yeah.
02:14:21.000 That is scary.
02:14:23.000 Yeah, you catch a mama and she's around her babies and she decides you're a problem. 0.98
02:14:26.000 And what about the elk?
02:14:27.000 Does that have a...
02:14:29.000 Like, would that run you down, like, if it saw you and felt threatened?
02:14:33.000 No, they're not as aggressive.
02:14:34.000 Yeah.
02:14:34.000 They're not the same.
02:14:35.000 I mean, if you got close to them, especially during, like, right now, which is called the rut...
02:14:41.000 Which is when, once a year, they get laid.
02:14:43.000 So once a year, they grow these giant antlers, and they get ready to fight.
02:14:47.000 Those antlers are not to fight off predators.
02:14:49.000 They're to fight each other.
02:14:50.000 Oh.
02:14:51.000 Yeah.
02:14:52.000 They go to war.
02:14:52.000 To fight another dude.
02:14:53.000 Yep. 0.98
02:14:54.000 They go to war for balls. 0.96
02:14:55.000 Wow. 0.99
02:14:56.000 They smash each other for chicks. 0.97
02:14:59.000 Really?
02:15:00.000 Craziest animal of all time.
02:15:02.000 That's wild.
02:15:02.000 They scream, man, like a Lord of the Rings sound.
02:15:06.000 It's like...
02:15:09.000 Oh my god.
02:15:10.000 Yeah, and then the females go, meow, meow. 1.00
02:15:13.000 They let out this sound, like, come give me some dick. 1.00
02:15:16.000 And they're like, I got some dick! 1.00
02:15:20.000 And is he yelling so she'll come to him? 1.00
02:15:22.000 Yeah, he's yelling so she'll come to him. 0.92
02:15:24.000 She's mewing, so here, you can listen to this.
02:15:27.000 Hear it.
02:15:28.000 This is from YouTube.
02:15:30.000 Terrifying elk scream.
02:15:32.000 This is what they sound like.
02:15:33.000 That looks just like the one...
02:15:41.000 It gets louder than that though.
02:15:43.000 Is that all it's got?
02:15:44.000 Or does it just keep going?
02:15:45.000 He's adorable.
02:15:47.000 Yeah, that's not too loud.
02:15:50.000 That's it?
02:15:51.000 That's weak. 0.96
02:15:51.000 Look at that big-ass rack. 0.96
02:15:53.000 Whoever put that video up, that is a lie. 0.97
02:15:56.000 Yeah.
02:15:56.000 That's not terrifying.
02:15:56.000 That's not terrifying.
02:15:58.000 You're scared of that bitch, you better stay home. 1.00
02:15:59.000 If you're in your tent at night and you heard that, you'd be a little scared. 1.00
02:16:02.000 See if you can find a better one, because there's some awesome one.
02:16:04.000 Amazing elk bugle.
02:16:06.000 So you were in one spot for a couple hours after you heard him?
02:16:09.000 For this one, we spotted him in the distance.
02:16:12.000 We spotted him on a hill with binoculars, and then you gotta play the wind.
02:16:16.000 You gotta get close to him.
02:16:18.000 You gotta figure out which way the wind is blowing.
02:16:20.000 So he doesn't smell you.
02:16:21.000 Yeah, the wind changes as the day goes on.
02:16:24.000 Uh-huh.
02:16:24.000 Because the ground heats up.
02:16:26.000 What is this?
02:16:31.000 Isn't that crazy?
02:16:40.000 How about that?
02:16:41.000 That's scary.
02:16:42.000 There's moose going to war in Alaska.
02:16:45.000 Moose battle. 1.00
02:16:46.000 They go to war, like, right on people's lawns and shit, fuck up their cars. 1.00
02:16:49.000 Jeez. 1.00
02:16:49.000 I mean, they're so big. 1.00
02:16:51.000 A moose is, like, twice the size of an elk.
02:16:53.000 Twice the size?
02:16:54.000 Oh, yeah.
02:16:54.000 Mooses get to, like, eight mooses.
02:16:56.000 Meeses to pieces. 1.00
02:16:57.000 My meeses.
02:16:59.000 They get really big.
02:17:00.000 They get to, like, 1,800 pounds.
02:17:01.000 Holy cow. 0.89
02:17:03.000 They're huge.
02:17:04.000 They're so big they don't even look real.
02:17:05.000 Jeez.
02:17:06.000 I saw one that my friend Ben shot in Alaska, in BC, in British Columbia.
02:17:13.000 And when it was walking across the road, there was like a dirt road that we were on.
02:17:16.000 We saw it walk from one section of the forest into the next.
02:17:19.000 It looked like, remember that War of the Worlds movie with Tom Cruise?
02:17:24.000 With the giant legs, like walking over cars. 0.99
02:17:29.000 You see, like, holy shit. 0.99
02:17:31.000 Can you eat moose? 1.00
02:17:32.000 Oh, yeah.
02:17:33.000 It's delicious.
02:17:34.000 Do you ever hunt for moose?
02:17:35.000 Yeah, I hunted for moose.
02:17:37.000 Oh, you did?
02:17:37.000 Once, yeah.
02:17:38.000 At that time, yeah, I shot a moose.
02:17:39.000 That's a moose right there.
02:17:40.000 This is it.
02:17:41.000 Oh, really?
02:17:41.000 That's a young moose.
02:17:42.000 That's why it doesn't have much antlers. 0.96
02:17:43.000 It doesn't have a big-ass set of antlers.
02:17:46.000 What's better to eat? 0.61
02:17:47.000 This is the moose, right?
02:17:48.000 I can't see it.
02:17:49.000 What's better to eat?
02:17:50.000 Moose is fantastic.
02:17:51.000 Moose and elk are real similar.
02:17:52.000 They're similar.
02:17:52.000 But deer's really good, too.
02:17:54.000 All wild game if it's healthy and it's prepared correctly and taken care of correctly.
02:18:00.000 It's got an amazing taste to it.
02:18:02.000 It's just really nutrient-dense, very protein-dense, very different than any other...
02:18:07.000 Again, if you want to eat meat, in my eyes, this is the best meat for you and the best case scenario because...
02:18:15.000 This is not like a factory farmed animal, and if you don't kill it, its fate is sealed by mountain lions, or bears, or wolves, depending on where it is, or starvation, or freezing to death.
02:18:27.000 And it has a very short life.
02:18:29.000 Yeah.
02:18:29.000 Oh, really?
02:18:30.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:18:30.000 I mean, if you find a nine-year-old elk, holy shit, how is that even possible? 0.99
02:18:36.000 Really? 0.99
02:18:36.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:18:37.000 50% of them in grizzly bear areas, they get killed by bears when they're babies.
02:18:42.000 That's a high percentage.
02:18:43.000 Yeah, they're fawns.
02:18:44.000 One out of two fawns get killed.
02:18:46.000 Deer fawns, too, in a lot of grizzly bear infested areas.
02:18:48.000 Wow.
02:18:50.000 Yeah.
02:18:51.000 I tried making that elk steak that you gave me, and I messed it up.
02:18:54.000 Yeah, well, you gotta cook it very lightly.
02:18:58.000 You don't want to, like, cook it...
02:18:59.000 You should use a meat thermometer.
02:19:01.000 I'll give you a whole thing.
02:19:02.000 It wasn't long.
02:19:02.000 I did it short amount of time, but it was...
02:19:05.000 What was wrong?
02:19:06.000 I think you said that there's some layer that...
02:19:08.000 Oh, the silver skin. 0.99
02:19:09.000 Yeah, the fascia.
02:19:11.000 I didn't take that off.
02:19:12.000 Well, I gave you a wrapped one that was from the butcher.
02:19:14.000 What was it?
02:19:14.000 A roast or a steak?
02:19:15.000 It was like a steak.
02:19:16.000 Do you remember what...
02:19:18.000 See what it is?
02:19:19.000 There's a white film that they keep on sometimes to sort of retain moisture.
02:19:23.000 And when you see it, it's like the fascia on the outside of the meat.
02:19:27.000 And you have to slice that off.
02:19:29.000 It wasn't like a real visible thing.
02:19:30.000 Yeah, it's really thin.
02:19:32.000 And sometimes it's in between the structure of the muscle.
02:19:34.000 You've got to find it and cut it out or eat around it.
02:19:37.000 Gotcha.
02:19:38.000 It's just a different kind of animal.
02:19:39.000 The taste was good, but it was just very chew, chew, chewy.
02:19:42.000 That's that part you've got to cut out.
02:19:43.000 That's all it is.
02:19:44.000 Right.
02:19:44.000 It was good, though.
02:19:45.000 The ground...
02:19:46.000 Oh yeah, that's the best.
02:19:48.000 To make for burgers and chili and all kinds of stuff.
02:19:50.000 With eggs in the morning?
02:19:51.000 Oh, it's fantastic.
02:19:52.000 Oh, it's so good. 0.99
02:19:53.000 And again, you don't have to worry about any bullshit. 0.99
02:19:55.000 There's no hormones. 1.00
02:19:56.000 Yeah.
02:19:57.000 Buy antibiotics.
02:19:58.000 That's the worst part.
02:19:59.000 And it's an animal that lived wild.
02:20:02.000 I don't like the idea of just blindly ordering meat when I'm out.
02:20:07.000 Because of not knowing where it came from or not knowing, you know.
02:20:10.000 Even worse, how about knowing?
02:20:13.000 Yeah.
02:20:13.000 Even worse.
02:20:14.000 It's like you think about what the animal was.
02:20:16.000 Yeah.
02:20:16.000 You know?
02:20:17.000 Yeah.
02:20:18.000 Suffering.
02:20:19.000 We're in a weird place where we're jammed into these boxes of people.
02:20:24.000 So many people. 1.00
02:20:25.000 Giant fucking populations. 1.00
02:20:27.000 It's huge. 1.00
02:20:27.000 And you've got to get these people food. 1.00
02:20:29.000 And so they don't want to know.
02:20:31.000 They don't.
02:20:32.000 They don't want to know where it came from.
02:20:33.000 Nope.
02:20:33.000 No, I know.
02:20:35.000 Think about how many people are looking for lunch every day.
02:20:40.000 I mean, how do you feed this...
02:20:42.000 Number of people. 0.91
02:20:44.000 Yeah, go to a pastrami, you know, a sandwich place, get a fucking big corned beef with Swiss and mustard, and you're sitting there with a friend, eating at Jerry's Deli, having a great time, eating some fries. 0.92
02:20:55.000 Thank you, thank you, bye! 0.98
02:20:57.000 What the hell happened?
02:20:58.000 No thought whatsoever to the whole process of what makes corned beef.
02:21:01.000 How do you get that?
02:21:02.000 Where did that come from?
02:21:03.000 Where is that?
02:21:04.000 Yeah.
02:21:05.000 No thought.
02:21:06.000 No thought at all.
02:21:07.000 Dude.
02:21:08.000 It's creepy. 0.99
02:21:09.000 You know, we're fucking weird, man. 0.95
02:21:12.000 But what do you do? 0.99
02:21:12.000 There's so many of us. 0.99
02:21:14.000 You can't do anything.
02:21:15.000 Like, there's no way...
02:21:16.000 Well, you can obviously do something, but I'm saying, like, the situation that we're in right now, it has to be, like, resolved, but it can't be resolved instantly.
02:21:24.000 Because to try to get all these people...
02:21:27.000 Some sort of ethically raised animals, pasture-fed animals that aren't forced to eat some shit they're not supposed to eat, so they're unhealthy, to get your vegetables all free of pesticides, but also a high yield. 0.98
02:21:42.000 You protect them from insects and pests and bullshit and disease. 0.95
02:21:48.000 Don't you feel like it's going to have to be, like there's this new, I think it's called Better Burger? 0.96
02:21:53.000 Oh, that's like a plant-based burger?
02:21:55.000 Yeah, that almost looks like it's bleeding.
02:21:58.000 Have you tried it?
02:22:00.000 I haven't tried it yet, but people have been talking about it a lot lately.
02:22:04.000 Don't confuse farm-raised plants with not having any consequences, though.
02:22:11.000 That's another problem that people have when they look at grain in particular.
02:22:15.000 And they look at this idea of grain being completely ethical.
02:22:18.000 I'm not saying don't eat grain.
02:22:20.000 I'm saying if you look at those gigantic combines that chew up all that grain, when you go over those fields after they've been freshly cut, you see vultures all over, circling. 0.99
02:22:32.000 Because there's a ton of fucking things that got killed in those blades. 0.99
02:22:36.000 Rodents and rabbits and all kinds of shit. 1.00
02:22:40.000 Occasionally fawns. 0.99
02:22:41.000 You know, if someone, you know, fucks up and fawns apparently will, when they're scared, when they're really young, they just stay put. 1.00
02:22:49.000 They're scared and they can get run over by shit. 1.00
02:22:51.000 But how are you going to feed 7 billion people? 1.00
02:22:54.000 Exactly.
02:22:54.000 Don't you feel like...
02:22:55.000 You know, here's the key, man.
02:22:56.000 Preservatives.
02:22:58.000 Without preservatives.
02:22:59.000 Like, everybody wants everything to be natural and organic, which is totally true. 0.96
02:23:02.000 But without preservatives, it's very difficult to get supplies of shit and, like, stockpile things and to have things in surplus. 0.92
02:23:08.000 I mean, other than grains and beans, you know, and canned things. 0.95
02:23:14.000 You know, you'd have to can everything, but a lot of, like, shipping and how we move stuff around and how long we want stuff to sit on the shelves and how long we want stuff to stay fresh and want to avoid mold...
02:23:26.000 By putting stuff in that avoids mold, it also fucks with the natural gut flora that we have.
02:23:31.000 Right.
02:23:32.000 In our bods.
02:23:33.000 See, I'm like a scientist.
02:23:35.000 I don't have any idea what I'm talking about. 0.99
02:23:36.000 I'm just repeating shit I read. 0.97
02:23:38.000 But isn't it crazy how passionate people... 0.98
02:23:42.000 Like, I talked about that I ate like a vegan for a couple years on my podcast.
02:23:49.000 We got more hate comments.
02:23:52.000 Like, people are so...
02:23:57.000 Like, passionate. 0.96
02:23:59.000 Like, screw you eating that way. 0.98
02:24:01.000 What do you mean? 0.98
02:24:01.000 I was eating that way. 0.98
02:24:03.000 I wasn't saying you have to eat that way.
02:24:05.000 But Pete, there is like an anger if you show them a different way of living or eating.
02:24:12.000 Eating.
02:24:13.000 Just eating.
02:24:14.000 Well, they look at you as a person who's responsible for the death and suffering of animals.
02:24:19.000 Right.
02:24:20.000 Yeah.
02:24:21.000 It's what it is.
02:24:22.000 Right.
02:24:23.000 And they wanted to show that they are in a better moral position, and they feel genuinely outraged by your eating meat.
02:24:30.000 But it's the other side, too. 0.50
02:24:32.000 If you say that you ate like a vegan, meat eaters come at you and say, who the hell do you think you are?
02:24:37.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:24:38.000 Oh, you're gay, bro. 1.00
02:24:39.000 Right. 0.98
02:24:39.000 Yeah. 0.98
02:24:40.000 How long have you been eating dirks?
02:24:41.000 Isn't it weird?
02:24:42.000 It is weird.
02:24:43.000 Like, who do you care about how I eat?
02:24:44.000 Well, the meat eater doesn't make any sense.
02:24:46.000 The meat eater ragged on the vegan, to me, doesn't make any sense at all. 0.98
02:24:50.000 Unless it's just, like, you ever meet a woman that is just so mad at men, because she's ran into a few fucked up men, and they're like, you can't even talk to them? 0.98
02:24:59.000 Alright. 0.97
02:25:00.000 People are just trying to be nice to you.
02:25:01.000 You won't let that happen. 1.00
02:25:03.000 Every man is shit. 1.00
02:25:05.000 It's sort of like I feel like maybe some meat eaters that shit on vegans, they get mad because vegans are so proselytizing. 1.00
02:25:13.000 It's such a common thing to be a proselytizing vegan that meat eaters are almost like Attack first. 0.99
02:25:20.000 First, right.
02:25:20.000 You know?
02:25:21.000 Yeah, like, screw you. 1.00
02:25:21.000 You're not going to make me feel bad about what I do. 1.00
02:25:23.000 Yeah, but then there's also...
02:25:24.000 There's a legit thought point that could be made that the people that are...
02:25:29.000 A lot of the people, maybe, that are shitting on vegans and veganism, they're doing so because they don't want to address their own complicity in the suffering of animals. 0.60
02:25:39.000 And they don't want to think about it. 0.96
02:25:41.000 You make me think about it. 0.99
02:25:41.000 I just want to go to Carl's Jr. and get that fucking bacon, jalapeno, cheddar thing with... 0.99
02:25:47.000 Yeah, there's that too. 0.99
02:25:49.000 Yeah, you can't deny.
02:25:50.000 Yeah, it's not there's no absolute.
02:25:52.000 It's not one or the other. 0.99
02:25:54.000 Yeah, it's it's very possible that there's a bunch of shit going on. 0.98
02:25:57.000 Yeah, but that the idea that you could Get mad at someone for eating vegan. 1.00
02:26:03.000 That seems crazy.
02:26:05.000 It does seem crazy, but I think that people are so connected to what they eat that it brings up this...
02:26:11.000 Yeah, it's a team thing.
02:26:12.000 Yeah, right.
02:26:13.000 It's like we were talking about.
02:26:14.000 Yeah.
02:26:14.000 Along the same line.
02:26:15.000 I mean, how many goddamn vegans out there have the word vegan in their Twitter profile or their Facebook profile or their Instagram profile? 0.99
02:26:23.000 It's true. 1.00
02:26:23.000 Jesus fucking Christ. 1.00
02:26:25.000 Right, you're wearing it like a... 1.00
02:26:26.000 Yeah, a badge of honor.
02:26:27.000 Right.
02:26:27.000 Yeah.
02:26:28.000 And they feel like they're going to help the world with this whole plant-based, plant-based, you know?
02:26:31.000 Right, yeah.
02:26:32.000 But if you wrote like Meat Eater, Tom Papa, Meat Eater on the...
02:26:36.000 Yeah.
02:26:37.000 You know, unless you run a TV show like Meat Eater with Steve Rinella on the Sportsman's Outdoor Channel.
02:26:43.000 Nice.
02:26:44.000 Unless you're doing that...
02:26:45.000 Yeah.
02:26:46.000 You would never do that, right?
02:26:47.000 No.
02:26:48.000 But you could write plant-based.
02:26:49.000 You know, like, hey, plant-based, I'm plant-based.
02:26:51.000 People write that in their profile all the time.
02:26:53.000 They do.
02:26:53.000 Vegan.
02:26:54.000 Happy vegan.
02:26:55.000 Yeah.
02:26:56.000 I'm the healthy vegan.
02:26:57.000 Yeah, this is me.
02:26:57.000 I'm the fit vegan.
02:26:59.000 I want you to know what I am and what I stand for.
02:27:01.000 Athletic vegan.
02:27:02.000 Like, there's so many people that have that in their name profile.
02:27:05.000 It's so obvious what you're doing.
02:27:07.000 Yeah.
02:27:08.000 I mean, some of them think, no, man.
02:27:09.000 I just want to be part of a team.
02:27:10.000 I just want to be part of it.
02:27:11.000 I'm promoting a healthy lifestyle.
02:27:12.000 I'm promoting what's going to save the world.
02:27:14.000 I'm promoting...
02:27:14.000 And I know they believe that.
02:27:17.000 I know they believe that.
02:27:18.000 But I think we tend to look at the entire thing, right?
02:27:23.000 We tend to look at the entire group of people like, we have to stop eating meat.
02:27:27.000 Look at what we're doing to the environment.
02:27:28.000 Well, some of us definitely...
02:27:32.000 Don't have to eat meat.
02:27:33.000 You can do whatever you want.
02:27:34.000 And we should all look at factory farming and say, this is despicable.
02:27:39.000 And this is horrific that we've allowed our civilization to accept this inside of our borders, right?
02:27:46.000 This is a barbaric practice.
02:27:48.000 And it's terrifying because there's a...
02:27:51.000 Complete denial of the natural order of life. 0.97
02:27:56.000 Instead, you're like, no, I'm going to just capture this life and cage it up and then shoot it when it's ready. 0.93
02:28:00.000 That way it stays tender because it doesn't move. 0.99
02:28:03.000 You're like, ooh, this is dark.
02:28:06.000 To me, what makes sense to me, and everybody has their own thoughts on this, what makes sense to me is to just...
02:28:13.000 Go out in the wild and get it yourself if you can.
02:28:17.000 Yeah.
02:28:17.000 Everybody can't.
02:28:18.000 No, I know.
02:28:19.000 People don't have the time.
02:28:20.000 Right.
02:28:20.000 I understand that too.
02:28:21.000 Yeah.
02:28:22.000 I get that.
02:28:22.000 I'm not telling anybody what to do.
02:28:24.000 But for me, I was at a point in 2012 where I was trying to decide if I was going to be a vegan or vegetarian.
02:28:30.000 Oh, yeah?
02:28:31.000 I would lean towards vegetarian because I don't think there's anything wrong with free-range eggs and things along those lines.
02:28:36.000 And I don't think there's anything wrong with catching fish either, so maybe I'd be a pescatarian. 0.98
02:28:40.000 But what I wanted to avoid was the factory farming thing is fucked up. 0.99
02:28:44.000 It is, completely. 0.99
02:28:45.000 So then I started hunting.
02:28:46.000 I was like, it's going to be one or the other.
02:28:48.000 Once I started hunting, I was like, oh, this is the way.
02:28:50.000 Because this is exciting and crazy and wild, and it puts you in tune with nature in this crazy way.
02:28:55.000 And you have this deep, intense respect for wild things that I never had before.
02:28:58.000 I didn't think about the management of wildlife or the resources of the land that we have, like public land.
02:29:05.000 And that these animals roam these areas, and these areas have to be supported with money, and that money comes from hunting tags and a tax on sportsman's gear and sporting gear.
02:29:15.000 Right.
02:29:16.000 You know, anything hunting gear related, they pay a giant sum of that money that goes towards conservation.
02:29:22.000 It's a big tax.
02:29:23.000 Right.
02:29:23.000 It's like 11%.
02:29:24.000 Wow.
02:29:25.000 Yeah, so this is like what supports that and all the licenses and everything that supports the fish and wildlife management.
02:29:32.000 Right.
02:29:33.000 Of this country, of all this wild game.
02:29:35.000 And that's why there's more deer in this country than there's been since Columbus landed.
02:29:39.000 There's more deer in this country than when Columbus landed.
02:29:42.000 Is that true?
02:29:43.000 Yes, it is.
02:29:44.000 More white-tailed deer in this country than there ever was before.
02:29:48.000 And then there's other animals that they had almost extirpated because of what they used to call market killing.
02:29:54.000 Market hunting they used to do at the turn of the century back when they didn't have refrigerators.
02:29:59.000 And they just took advantage of these wild animals roaming around.
02:30:02.000 They would hire assassins, essentially, to go out, shoot these animals, and sell the meat.
02:30:07.000 They almost wiped out all the elk.
02:30:09.000 They almost wiped out all the deer.
02:30:10.000 They almost wiped out everything.
02:30:11.000 So at one point in time, before Fish and Wildlife Management Company started managing all this stuff, There was a severe problem with the lack of wildlife and the possible impending extinction crisis.
02:30:26.000 But since then, they've repopulated elk in a lot of areas.
02:30:30.000 They repopulated deer almost everywhere it was before.
02:30:34.000 I have family in New Jersey, and there are deer all over the place.
02:30:38.000 And I always thought it was because there was so much development that the deer have nowhere to go.
02:30:43.000 Well, it's because there's no predators.
02:30:45.000 And New Jersey has more predators now than ever before.
02:30:48.000 New Jersey has the densest population of black bears in the country.
02:30:51.000 Really?
02:30:52.000 Yeah.
02:30:53.000 So those are the predators that control the deer population, but a lot of times that's not enough food for them.
02:30:58.000 And then the encroaching population, they find out about garbage cans and things like that, and then they become a giant problem.
02:31:04.000 Right.
02:31:05.000 Because there's also the densest populated with humans.
02:31:08.000 Well, it is, but it's not.
02:31:09.000 See, New Jersey has a lot of really rural areas that a lot of people aren't really thinking about.
02:31:13.000 They're not aware.
02:31:14.000 There's a ton of wildlife in New Jersey.
02:31:16.000 Yeah.
02:31:17.000 People only think about Newark.
02:31:18.000 Newark.
02:31:19.000 Yeah, which is where I was born.
02:31:20.000 Yeah.
02:31:21.000 You know, they think of like northern New York, or New Jersey rather, which is close to New York.
02:31:25.000 Right, Bergen County.
02:31:26.000 That's where I was born.
02:31:27.000 But southern New Jersey.
02:31:28.000 And west.
02:31:29.000 The whole west. 0.99
02:31:30.000 Oh, it's all fucking crazy. 0.99
02:31:31.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:31:31.000 It's crazy rural out there. 0.99
02:31:33.000 Yeah.
02:31:34.000 My brother-in-law started...
02:31:36.000 Similar to what you started thinking about how he's going to get his food and stuff, and he started hunting deer, and because it's in New Jersey, there's all these deer, so he goes out, he gets like two a season, and it feeds his family for the year.
02:31:50.000 Yeah.
02:31:51.000 It's amazing.
02:31:52.000 Look, First of all, you're controlling a population that needs to be controlled because there's a ton of accidents.
02:31:57.000 Two million car accidents in this country last year.
02:32:00.000 People hitting deer.
02:32:01.000 And 150 people died.
02:32:03.000 Two million from hitting deer?
02:32:04.000 Yeah, in this country alone.
02:32:06.000 Jeez.
02:32:06.000 Yeah.
02:32:07.000 That's crazy.
02:32:08.000 Unless you want to bring mountain lions and wolves everywhere, you have to figure out a way to control those things.
02:32:12.000 One of the best ways to control that also contributes to wildlife management funds is hunting, because they pay for hunting tax.
02:32:19.000 See, it's all very counterintuitive, because we assume that people who hunt don't like wildlife, right?
02:32:24.000 No, you don't like it.
02:32:24.000 If you liked it, you would leave it alone.
02:32:26.000 Let it live its life, man.
02:32:28.000 Right.
02:32:29.000 Yeah, but the problem is we've set up highways and these cities, and you can't just leave it alone now.
02:32:34.000 We've already interfered in nature to a point where we've altered gigantic swaths of land to suit our bidding.
02:32:40.000 So you either want to regress away from technological...
02:32:44.000 So the people that drive Tesla saying this are the most crazy.
02:32:47.000 What? 0.68
02:32:47.000 Oh, sorry. 0.68
02:32:49.000 You know what I mean?
02:32:50.000 It's like people who want cities and want technology, but they don't want management of wildlife.
02:32:54.000 You don't understand.
02:32:55.000 They don't even understand that they've never been out there.
02:32:57.000 The city's not even possible unless you manage wildlife.
02:32:59.000 Right.
02:33:00.000 Because if mountain lions and bears start moving into Pasadena and start killing people, you're going to need to manage them.
02:33:06.000 If deers are everywhere and everyone's crashing into cars, you're going to manage them.
02:33:09.000 What are you going to do?
02:33:09.000 How are you going to manage them?
02:33:10.000 Right.
02:33:11.000 Well, humans shouldn't play God, man.
02:33:13.000 Okay.
02:33:14.000 Okay, well, just go outside and hope you don't get eaten.
02:33:17.000 Good luck.
02:33:18.000 No, I would say a high percentage, without knowing anything, of people that hunt love the outdoors, love being out there.
02:33:26.000 But then you have those stories, like you were saying, with the Ted Nugent, where people just kind of come in with their guns and shoot and get drunk and go off.
02:33:33.000 Ted Nugent doesn't do that, but he is a very boisterous right-wing type character.
02:33:38.000 No, I'm saying the guys who came in and just shot his bucks and split.
02:33:41.000 Oh, those guys. 0.96
02:33:42.000 I don't know if they were drunk or just crazy. 0.67
02:33:43.000 They were drunk.
02:33:44.000 They were all cracked up, messed up.
02:33:46.000 Yeah, they were on crank. 0.96
02:33:48.000 You're cranked up and going around and killing people. 0.97
02:33:50.000 Bathtub crank. 0.83
02:33:51.000 Well, I hope this discussion doesn't dissuade you from going to Musso and Frank's, like, gentlemen in art suits.
02:33:55.000 No!
02:33:55.000 We have to do what we gotta do.
02:33:57.000 A martini and a steak once a year!
02:33:59.000 For all those cows.
02:34:01.000 Once a year.
02:34:02.000 But this meat that I ate last night, that I shot yesterday morning and ate that night, may be the best thing I've ever eaten in my life.
02:34:10.000 Really? 0.98
02:34:11.000 Fucking phenomenal! 0.99
02:34:11.000 I saw the picture on Instagram, that one. 0.99
02:34:13.000 Yeah!
02:34:14.000 Phenomenal!
02:34:14.000 So rich with nutrients, man.
02:34:16.000 I feel healthy just looking at those pictures.
02:34:17.000 Dude, it's so good.
02:34:21.000 It's so rich with nutrients.
02:34:23.000 So how did you cook that?
02:34:24.000 I cooked it on...
02:34:25.000 I have a pellet grill.
02:34:26.000 It's called a Yoder.
02:34:27.000 There's a bunch of really good ones.
02:34:28.000 Traeger makes a really good one.
02:34:30.000 Green Mountain Grills makes a really good one.
02:34:32.000 There's a bunch of companies that make them.
02:34:34.000 I cook it at 275 degrees until it hits an internal temperature of 125 degrees.
02:34:41.000 It's not so long, right?
02:34:42.000 No.
02:34:42.000 Then I take it off, and then I heat up a cast-iron skillet.
02:34:46.000 I've jied a bunch of different ways, but this is the method that works the best for me, that I like the best.
02:34:51.000 I heat a cast-iron skillet very, very hot, and then I put some grass-fed butter in the cast-iron skillet, and then I sear the outside and put a crust.
02:35:00.000 So after the internal temperature is already 125 degrees, I cook it real quick.
02:35:04.000 So off the pellet, into the pan, which is on the stovetop?
02:35:08.000 Mm-hmm. 1.00
02:35:09.000 Yeah, hot as fuck. 1.00
02:35:09.000 And just sear it? 1.00
02:35:10.000 Yeah, like maybe less than a minute each side.
02:35:14.000 Oh, really?
02:35:15.000 Like maybe, yeah, like maybe like 45 seconds maybe each side, just to get a little crust on that.
02:35:20.000 Nice.
02:35:21.000 And it just is the perfect combination of the outside and the inside is very rare-like, but warm.
02:35:28.000 That's like when you take a bite and you just start pounding the table.
02:35:31.000 Oh, so good!
02:35:32.000 And it makes you, like, feel physically good.
02:35:35.000 Yeah.
02:35:35.000 Not like, like, oh, good, you're a big man, you killed an animal.
02:35:38.000 That's not what I mean.
02:35:38.000 I mean, like, your body responds to the nutrients in the meat in almost like an instantaneous way.
02:35:45.000 And part of it could be the thing that's very different than going to Jerry's Deli and getting that pastrami is that there's a...
02:35:52.000 Incredible, deep, immediate connection with that food, especially for me that day, knowing that I shot that that morning.
02:36:01.000 How did you get it?
02:36:02.000 Don't you have to go to the butcher?
02:36:04.000 No, we take parts of the body off. 0.64
02:36:06.000 We take the back straps and the tenderloins, which are very easy to manage cuts.
02:36:11.000 The butcher shop will cut steaks out of the back legs and the hams and make roasts and things like that.
02:36:18.000 Gotcha.
02:36:18.000 So what was that piece that you had last night?
02:36:21.000 It was the tenderloin.
02:36:22.000 That you just took with you?
02:36:23.000 Yeah, well, I took a bunch of it with me.
02:36:25.000 Right. 0.99
02:36:25.000 I just put it in a cooler, a Yeti cooler, and put ice in it and shit. 0.99
02:36:29.000 But dude, it's the total opposite of going to a burger place, where you just go, yeah, can I get a double-double? 0.99
02:36:36.000 Yeah, onions, fries, large Diet Coke, too, please.
02:36:40.000 Right, you get that, and it's great.
02:36:41.000 I mean, it tastes good and everything like that, but there's no connection.
02:36:44.000 Nothing.
02:36:45.000 There's no thought.
02:36:46.000 This insane connection, and it's really difficult to accomplish, to shoot an elk with a bow and arrow.
02:36:52.000 That's crazy.
02:36:53.000 It takes years and years of practice, and I still suck at it compared to a really good archer and a really good hunter.
02:36:58.000 I'm still constantly practicing, constantly trying to evolve it. 0.61
02:37:05.000 Like if I were to get into hunting and go out there, I'd have to take a gun because otherwise I'm going to be shooting it in its eye.
02:37:12.000 Even that, you have to learn how to shoot a gun properly.
02:37:15.000 People think it's easy to go shoot an animal with a gun. 1.00
02:37:17.000 Good luck getting close to one if you don't know what the fuck you're doing. 1.00
02:37:20.000 You could luck out and... 0.99
02:37:22.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:37:22.000 Wander into a deer's not paying attention and shoot them. 1.00
02:37:25.000 Right. 0.75
02:37:25.000 But most of the time, no. 0.75
02:37:27.000 Like, most of the time, you have to get within a couple hundred yards of them. 0.99
02:37:30.000 If the wind is wrong, they smell you a mile away, they fucking bolt immediately. 0.99
02:37:35.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:37:36.000 We stink. 0.96
02:37:37.000 Do we? 0.94
02:37:37.000 We smell terrible. 0.94
02:37:39.000 When animals smell us, I don't know, I would wish science could figure out what it is that hits an animal's nostrils when they smell a person. 0.99
02:37:49.000 But like a deer, they're like, fuck this, they're gone. 0.99
02:37:52.000 Really? 1.00
02:37:53.000 Yeah, the wind hits the back of your neck.
02:37:55.000 Like, say if you're, like, winds change.
02:37:57.000 Right.
02:37:57.000 So, like, say if you're looking at these animals, and you're trying to make a stalk on one, and then the wind is blowing in your face, like, this is perfect, they can't smell me, because the wind's in my face.
02:38:07.000 Then as you get closer, the wind can shift.
02:38:10.000 Right. 1.00
02:38:10.000 And sometimes the wind swirls, and you feel it on the back of your neck, and you see the animals perk up, and they're like, fuck! 1.00
02:38:15.000 Right. 0.99
02:38:16.000 And they're gone.
02:38:17.000 Yeah.
02:38:17.000 It's amazing.
02:38:18.000 It's crazy.
02:38:19.000 Because they're thinking about cats.
02:38:20.000 That's what they're thinking about.
02:38:22.000 They're thinking about smelling a cat.
02:38:23.000 Right. 1.00
02:38:24.000 And that fucking... 1.00
02:38:25.000 That scent hits them. 1.00
02:38:26.000 Yeah, this weird human scent.
02:38:28.000 The human thing's bad, too.
02:38:29.000 I think we probably smell...
02:38:31.000 We probably have our own unique danger smell.
02:38:33.000 Yeah.
02:38:34.000 But they're...
02:38:34.000 I mean, they're...
02:38:36.000 The evolution is not to avoid humans.
02:38:38.000 We've only been here a couple hundred years.
02:38:39.000 The evolution of the elk is most likely to avoid predators, cats and bears.
02:38:44.000 They smell a predator. 1.00
02:38:47.000 They're like, fuck this. 1.00
02:38:49.000 Imagine the breath of a grizzly bear, and the wind hits you. 1.00
02:38:54.000 Oh my god.
02:38:55.000 Oh Jesus! 1.00
02:38:56.000 If you're a fucking deer, you're like, Jesus! 1.00
02:38:58.000 I saw a coyote the other day out on my neighbor's lawn. 1.00
02:39:01.000 It was like a husky. 1.00
02:39:03.000 It was a big ass. 1.00
02:39:05.000 It looked like a wolf. 1.00
02:39:06.000 It's probably a coy wolf.
02:39:08.000 Do you know how those are happening?
02:39:09.000 Uh-huh.
02:39:10.000 There's coyotes.
02:39:11.000 Well, here's the thing.
02:39:13.000 There was a guy named Dan Flores that I had on the podcast.
02:39:15.000 Yeah.
02:39:15.000 He wrote this book called Coyote America.
02:39:17.000 Fascinating book about the history of coyotes in America.
02:39:19.000 Oh, yeah. 0.98
02:39:19.000 I fucking absorbed that book. 0.98
02:39:21.000 It's so good. 0.99
02:39:21.000 Really? 0.99
02:39:22.000 Oh, it's amazing.
02:39:23.000 Because it's so crazy. 1.00
02:39:23.000 There's all this shit that I didn't know. 1.00
02:39:25.000 One of the things is that a coyote is a wolf. 1.00
02:39:28.000 It is a wolf.
02:39:28.000 A small wolf.
02:39:29.000 It's a small species of wolf and that's why they interbreed with wolves.
02:39:34.000 No problem.
02:39:35.000 Every wolf except the gray wolf.
02:39:37.000 The gray wolf left America for so long and went to Africa and became like jackals and all these different dog species over there.
02:39:45.000 But all the dogs that we have, all of them, came from wolves.
02:39:48.000 All of them.
02:39:49.000 All of our dogs?
02:39:50.000 My dogs?
02:39:50.000 Every dog.
02:39:51.000 And they all can breed with a wolf.
02:39:53.000 Really?
02:39:54.000 All of them, yeah.
02:39:55.000 And the coyotes, they breed with different, like a lot of coyotes, like what percentage gray wolf, what percentage red wolf.
02:40:02.000 Like they're separate species, but they're all the same thing genetically.
02:40:06.000 Like every dog, when they trace the DNA of a dog, all of them come from wolves.
02:40:11.000 Really?
02:40:12.000 Yeah.
02:40:13.000 So my little black lab?
02:40:14.000 The coy wolf.
02:40:15.000 Yeah, your little black lab at one point, you know, who knows when they started that process, was a wolf.
02:40:21.000 So these coy wolves, you see the one in the black?
02:40:25.000 That's the coy wolf. 0.53
02:40:26.000 Right.
02:40:26.000 And it's like a combination of like a wolf and a coyote.
02:40:31.000 Meanwhile, even coyotes though, this guy Dan Flores was saying, are kind of wolf.
02:40:36.000 That's why it works in the first place.
02:40:38.000 Because they don't, like if something like a tiger fucks a lion and they make a liger, that liger can't have babies. 0.99
02:40:46.000 Because they're totally different species. 0.99
02:40:48.000 But a tiger can fuck a lion and get it pregnant. 1.00
02:40:51.000 There's a real liger? 1.00
02:40:52.000 That looks like it's about to talk to you.
02:40:53.000 Like, hey, Billy, where are you going?
02:40:56.000 This is not the woods for you.
02:40:58.000 I wouldn't go this way.
02:40:59.000 It's dangerous out here, buddy.
02:41:00.000 Let me get you back home to your parents.
02:41:02.000 Hold on! 0.98
02:41:02.000 Here comes a bear! 0.98
02:41:05.000 I'm protecting these kids, you fuck! 1.00
02:41:07.000 Dude, you smell. 1.00
02:41:09.000 Yeah.
02:41:09.000 You smell terrible.
02:41:11.000 Get out of here.
02:41:12.000 So what you're seeing is larger coyotes.
02:41:14.000 This was a big coyote.
02:41:16.000 Yeah.
02:41:16.000 It was big.
02:41:17.000 I was like, oh my god.
02:41:18.000 He might just be a big coyote, though.
02:41:20.000 He might just be a regular coyote that's big.
02:41:21.000 That's just big.
02:41:22.000 He ate a lot.
02:41:23.000 Yeah.
02:41:23.000 A lot of food out here, man.
02:41:24.000 Man, mostly pets.
02:41:25.000 It's a lot of pets.
02:41:26.000 A lot of pets.
02:41:27.000 Yeah, a lot of pets.
02:41:29.000 Man.
02:41:29.000 But believe me, we got it light.
02:41:30.000 Deal with coyotes as opposed to those people in New Jersey that are dealing with bears.
02:41:34.000 Yeah.
02:41:35.000 People don't know.
02:41:36.000 People that live outside, like go to that video from Far Rockaway where these two 500-pound bear, I might be exaggerating, 500-pound bears are rustling and fighting in the street, knocking over mailboxes.
02:41:49.000 In New Jersey?
02:41:50.000 And cars stop their engine.
02:41:52.000 And if I'm exaggerating, it's not by much.
02:41:54.000 Look at these two things.
02:41:55.000 Oh, man. 1.00
02:41:56.000 Look at the size of these fuckers, dude. 1.00
02:41:58.000 Looks like my sister's house. 1.00
02:41:59.000 But look how they fall down, and they knock shit over. 0.99
02:42:02.000 They slam, look at how they knocked over that fence post. 1.00
02:42:05.000 Look at the size of these fuckers. 1.00
02:42:06.000 God. 1.00
02:42:08.000 And they're fighting over territory.
02:42:10.000 They don't attack people, though.
02:42:11.000 Sure they do.
02:42:12.000 They do?
02:42:13.000 Rockaway, New Jersey.
02:42:14.000 A kid in Rutgers was killed a couple of years ago.
02:42:16.000 A kid in Alaska was killed by a bear who was on...
02:42:19.000 Look at them go to war.
02:42:20.000 God, they're big.
02:42:21.000 A kid in Alaska was killed.
02:42:23.000 He was on a race.
02:42:24.000 He was on a trail race.
02:42:26.000 No.
02:42:26.000 16-year-old kid.
02:42:27.000 He called his mom and said a bear was following him.
02:42:28.000 Oh my god.
02:42:29.000 And then the bear got him.
02:42:31.000 They found the bear protecting the kid's body. 1.00
02:42:33.000 Look at the size of that fucker. 1.00
02:42:35.000 That's huge. 1.00
02:42:36.000 I thought black bears were small. 1.00
02:42:37.000 No, that's bullshit. 1.00
02:42:39.000 They're huge. 1.00
02:42:40.000 I thought they were small.
02:42:41.000 How small do you think they were?
02:42:43.000 I thought they were like smaller than that.
02:42:46.000 Like half the size of that.
02:42:47.000 When they first are, when they're babies, and they keep growing, they get really big.
02:42:50.000 The ones at the jug band.
02:42:52.000 They get huge, man.
02:42:54.000 They get huge.
02:42:54.000 They get to be like eight feet tall.
02:42:56.000 Jeez.
02:42:57.000 Yeah.
02:42:57.000 So what's the predator for the black bear in New Jersey?
02:43:00.000 Hunters.
02:43:00.000 Yeah.
02:43:01.000 That's it.
02:43:02.000 Bears don't have any predators.
02:43:04.000 None.
02:43:04.000 Well, the only predator to a bear is another bear, which they do kill each other a lot.
02:43:08.000 Right.
02:43:08.000 And they eat each other a lot.
02:43:10.000 Especially babies.
02:43:12.000 Jeez.
02:43:12.000 They eat a lot of babies.
02:43:14.000 They do?
02:43:14.000 Oof.
02:43:15.000 Yeah.
02:43:15.000 A lot of babies.
02:43:16.000 Yeah.
02:43:17.000 How about this guy? 0.99
02:43:18.000 He's riding his mountain bike, and he sees that bear, and he fucking falls down. 0.99
02:43:21.000 He's like, Jesus. 0.99
02:43:22.000 We don't have him out here?
02:43:25.000 Look at this.
02:43:26.000 Panic! 0.82
02:43:27.000 Jesus! 1.00
02:43:28.000 You ever see the one where the guy hits the bear in his car, and he fucking screams, holy fuck! 1.00
02:43:32.000 Oh no! 1.00
02:43:33.000 He's driving his car down this road, going like 35 miles an hour, and this bear jumps out last minute.
02:43:38.000 Boom! 0.99
02:43:38.000 Hits the car, and the bear goes flying, and then runs off into the woods. 0.99
02:43:44.000 Oh my god!
02:43:45.000 Probably died.
02:43:46.000 Yeah.
02:43:47.000 But watch this.
02:43:47.000 Slowly.
02:43:48.000 Watch this, this is crazy, yeah. 1.00
02:43:50.000 Watch this shit, he's driving his car. 1.00
02:43:55.000 Just having a good time. 1.00
02:43:57.000 Here I am.
02:43:58.000 You know, just driving.
02:44:01.000 Oh! 0.60
02:44:02.000 Oh! 0.60
02:44:05.000 Oh my god!
02:44:08.000 That's not even the one.
02:44:10.000 It went flying.
02:44:11.000 That's the Daily Mail one.
02:44:13.000 And then ran into the woods.
02:44:14.000 Yeah, there's another one that happens even quicker.
02:44:16.000 This is a little different because it's got a guardrail.
02:44:18.000 The other one, the other video is there's a bunch of trees to the side.
02:44:21.000 This is it.
02:44:22.000 Yeah, North Carolina.
02:44:23.000 Watch this one.
02:44:24.000 Oh, I'm just driving along, thinking about the time when white people used to run the world and slavery was... 0.92
02:44:28.000 Oh my god!
02:44:30.000 That thing's huge!
02:44:31.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:44:31.000 Oh my god, I just hit the shit out of a fucking bear. 1.00
02:44:35.000 I said the same thing! 1.00
02:44:38.000 Rewind that again.
02:44:39.000 Oh man, oh man!
02:44:40.000 Rewind that again.
02:44:41.000 Oh my god, that's insane.
02:44:53.000 That couldn't be any better than if somebody narrated over an accident like that.
02:44:59.000 Oh, that's terrible. 1.00
02:45:00.000 I'm gonna go home and smoke a fucking big bowl. 1.00
02:45:02.000 You missed that part. 1.00
02:45:04.000 Oh my god.
02:45:06.000 That is scary.
02:45:07.000 I just hit a bear.
02:45:09.000 They're huge, dude.
02:45:10.000 My sister-in-law just hit a deer. 0.53
02:45:11.000 She's just like, you know, Bergen County, not a rural part.
02:45:17.000 My friend Cam lives in Oregon, and one of the guys in his neighborhood died because someone in front of him hit a deer.
02:45:24.000 And the deer went flying through the air, and his car was behind it, and the deer landed through his windshield and killed him.
02:45:29.000 Oh my god.
02:45:30.000 Jeez. 1.00
02:45:31.000 Fuck. 1.00
02:45:31.000 It's just, yeah, just flying bone. 1.00
02:45:34.000 And then here's the angry vegan argument. 1.00
02:45:36.000 So, you just want all these animals to go away so you can continue destroying the world with your stupid fucking car, man. 1.00
02:45:43.000 Is that what you're saying? 1.00
02:45:45.000 So yeah, there shouldn't be any wildlife because it inconveniences you.
02:45:48.000 How about it's their land, man?
02:45:50.000 How about it's theirs? 0.72
02:45:52.000 Well then, you couldn't be talking to me because there'd be no computers.
02:45:55.000 We can't live here.
02:45:57.000 Because if it was their land, you wouldn't survive. 0.56
02:45:59.000 We carve off swaths of it for what we decide the cities are ours.
02:46:03.000 No, man.
02:46:03.000 The cities aren't even real, man.
02:46:05.000 This is something we built over their sacred burial ground.
02:46:08.000 This is where the bears just bury their young, man.
02:46:11.000 Yeah.
02:46:12.000 And talk to each other in an ancient language we don't understand anymore.
02:46:15.000 Yeah.
02:46:16.000 Look, we all have our own little fantasy worlds.
02:46:19.000 Yeah.
02:46:19.000 Well, the anthropomorphization, that thing that Disney movies did where they made animals talk.
02:46:24.000 Yeah. 0.92
02:46:24.000 That fucked people up. 0.92
02:46:25.000 It really did. 0.99
02:46:26.000 Fucked us up as children. 0.90
02:46:27.000 It really did. 0.99
02:46:28.000 It really did.
02:46:29.000 Yeah.
02:46:29.000 No, I know.
02:46:30.000 I mean, people think that's a joke.
02:46:32.000 I'm joking around.
02:46:33.000 I'm being dead serious.
02:46:34.000 I watch My Kids Are Vegetarians because my wife is. 0.89
02:46:38.000 What?
02:46:39.000 And...
02:46:41.000 No, a big part of it was seeing them as people, like seeing them with a little bow tie.
02:46:46.000 It really has an effect.
02:46:48.000 Of course.
02:46:50.000 Especially when you're a little baby.
02:46:52.000 When you grow up watching Yogi Bear or watching Foghorn Leghorn.
02:46:58.000 But as a child, when I was watching that stuff, my mom was also making amazing meals at the same time, so it was like I did not connect it now.
02:47:07.000 Yogi was Yogi, and mom just made lasagna.
02:47:10.000 There's a real problem with representing something.
02:47:13.000 I mean, look, it's entertaining.
02:47:15.000 There's nothing wrong with that for us as an adult.
02:47:17.000 But as a child, it puts the idea in your head that these things are something other than what they are.
02:47:23.000 Right.
02:47:23.000 You know, not that there's anything bad with what they are.
02:47:26.000 What they are is amazing.
02:47:27.000 Even predators.
02:47:28.000 Like, I wouldn't want predators wiped out. 0.98
02:47:30.000 I think bears and wolves, they're fucking awesome, man. 0.94
02:47:33.000 It's crazy to see, too. 0.99
02:47:35.000 Oh, no.
02:47:36.000 Be around them. 0.78
02:47:37.000 Yeah, and look, I mean, that's why the factory farming thing is so gross.
02:47:40.000 There's a consciousness to animals.
02:47:42.000 I mean, my dog, you know, has a sensitivity and a love.
02:47:48.000 I mean, you make those animals suffer.
02:47:51.000 I mean, that's bad.
02:47:53.000 Well, the other thing is that that animal, especially dogs, they have developed this intense sensitivity and connection with people over thousands and thousands of years of having this weird symbiotic relationship with us.
02:48:04.000 Yeah.
02:48:04.000 To the point where you get, like, I have a golden, golden retriever.
02:48:07.000 Yeah.
02:48:07.000 Dude, this is the sweetest dog I've ever had in my life.
02:48:10.000 Yeah.
02:48:10.000 He's just a big old snuggle bunny.
02:48:12.000 Yeah.
02:48:12.000 He's a baby.
02:48:13.000 He's the sweetest thing.
02:48:14.000 Yeah.
02:48:14.000 Like, occasionally he plays a little too rough and everybody gets mad at him.
02:48:18.000 Right.
02:48:19.000 But it's like, nothing.
02:48:20.000 Yeah.
02:48:20.000 He's such a sweetie.
02:48:21.000 Love bucket.
02:48:22.000 Like, when I come home, that dog, he runs around me in circles, then drops onto his back, and I start rubbing his belly.
02:48:28.000 Yeah.
02:48:28.000 And then I sit down, and he climbs on top of me and circles around and kisses my face.
02:48:32.000 Just licking like crazy. 0.88
02:48:33.000 And then he plops on me, like, with his legs up in the air, and he wants me to rub his tummy. 0.96
02:48:37.000 Yeah.
02:48:37.000 He's the best.
02:48:38.000 It's the best.
02:48:39.000 He's so sweet, man.
02:48:40.000 You know, they did a...
02:48:41.000 There was an article the other day, which I didn't get too deep into, but that they...
02:48:45.000 This guy...
02:48:52.000 Oh, wow.
02:49:08.000 Empathy and feeling for things and like emotion of like, you know, it was so similar that it really showed like, just genetically wired to feel and have emotion very similar to the way we do.
02:49:23.000 That's fascinating.
02:49:24.000 You know what else they're genetically wired to do? 0.98
02:49:26.000 Kill chickens. 0.98
02:49:27.000 Wow. 0.94
02:49:28.000 Real problem.
02:49:29.000 Yeah.
02:49:29.000 Do you have chickens?
02:49:30.000 Yeah.
02:49:30.000 I don't know if he's killed one, but he definitely brought a dead one to me once.
02:49:34.000 Really?
02:49:34.000 Yeah, but I was like, did you kill this?
02:49:36.000 What the fuck happened? 0.99
02:49:38.000 Because it didn't make sense. 0.99
02:49:39.000 What do you mean?
02:49:40.000 Because he didn't seem that aggressive with the chickens before.
02:49:43.000 I think it might have died.
02:49:44.000 Like, they just die sometimes.
02:49:45.000 Sure.
02:49:46.000 They just die.
02:49:46.000 You find them in their pen.
02:49:48.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:49:48.000 They have this big ass... 1.00
02:49:50.000 Like a chicken house. 1.00
02:49:51.000 Sometimes you just find them in their dead.
02:49:53.000 Oh, yeah.
02:49:54.000 Is that where you get all your eggs?
02:49:55.000 Yeah.
02:49:56.000 That's great.
02:49:56.000 They don't live that long.
02:49:57.000 But he fucking, now that he's had one in his mouth and he's carried it around, and I found it, now he wants to go near them all the time. 0.99
02:50:06.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:50:07.000 Cut the shit. 1.00
02:50:08.000 Can you train him not to do that? 1.00
02:50:10.000 Nah, sort of.
02:50:10.000 Yeah.
02:50:11.000 But you gotta be on it all the time.
02:50:12.000 Yeah.
02:50:12.000 It's gotta be like a daily thing.
02:50:14.000 Like, he really likes chasing chickens.
02:50:16.000 Yeah.
02:50:16.000 He's like, what are you talking about?
02:50:17.000 These are fucking chickens. 1.00
02:50:19.000 Joe, do you know these are back here? 1.00
02:50:21.000 Yeah.
02:50:21.000 Joe, there's a whole house of them.
02:50:22.000 How'd this thing since it was a baby?
02:50:24.000 Chase chickens.
02:50:25.000 It's like it's in there, man.
02:50:26.000 It's in the system.
02:50:27.000 It's instinct, of course.
02:50:29.000 Oh, yeah, dude.
02:50:29.000 He's so happy, too.
02:50:30.000 When you catch him doing it, you're like, hey!
02:50:33.000 He just doesn't want to listen.
02:50:36.000 My dog, like, it's great.
02:50:38.000 Black Lab.
02:50:39.000 She's so sweet.
02:50:40.000 Same thing.
02:50:41.000 And because it's a vegetarian household...
02:50:46.000 It was only when, I don't make meat that often when I'm with the family, because it's just kind of, you know, it's kind of weird to be sitting there eating meat in front of them.
02:50:53.000 So, but when I do, when we're alone, sometimes when they're there, giving her some meat, she started to see me as the one thing in the house that gave me whatever that was.
02:51:06.000 Our relationship went to a whole nother level.
02:51:08.000 Yeah.
02:51:10.000 Yeah.
02:51:10.000 Now she looks at me differently.
02:51:12.000 Meat with butter on it.
02:51:15.000 They don't even bother chewing it.
02:51:17.000 You ever see when you give them a piece of steak?
02:51:19.000 It's gone so fast.
02:51:20.000 It's gone so fast.
02:51:21.000 I really feel like, no, enjoy that.
02:51:24.000 But if you give them dog food, they never react like that.
02:51:27.000 They're like, I'll eat this. 1.00
02:51:28.000 I'll just hurry up and chew this shit down. 1.00
02:51:30.000 Yeah, you're calling it chicken. 1.00
02:51:31.000 It's all bullshit. 1.00
02:51:32.000 I cut off a couple peaks of elk and put it in my dog's food. 1.00
02:51:35.000 They go crazy.
02:51:38.000 Looking for more of it.
02:51:39.000 Gone.
02:51:40.000 Smell it behind the bowl, under the bowl.
02:51:42.000 This can't be gone.
02:51:43.000 Take your time.
02:51:44.000 Enjoy it.
02:51:45.000 It's too good.
02:51:47.000 Instincts.
02:51:47.000 Yeah, it's in us.
02:51:49.000 It is a weird thing that we've created these animals, not created them, but sort of bred them to the point where they become a part of the household.
02:51:55.000 Yeah.
02:51:56.000 And they live with you, but they don't speak English.
02:51:58.000 No!
02:51:58.000 They know the rules.
02:51:59.000 They know the rules.
02:52:00.000 Yeah.
02:52:00.000 And they could kill you, but they don't.
02:52:01.000 When your dog sometimes is just face to face, she's licking you on the face, and you just see the teeth, and you're like, this is kind of weird that my face is close to this jaw.
02:52:12.000 Yeah.
02:52:13.000 Thank God this thing is really nice because it could just bite me in the face right now. 0.99
02:52:17.000 That's why erratic dogs like Cujo are so fucking terrifying. 0.99
02:52:20.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:52:20.000 It's because they're a part of your family, then all of a sudden something goes wrong. 0.99
02:52:24.000 I had a dog when I was a kid that we got from the pound and had distemper.
02:52:27.000 And we had him for a couple days and it just kept getting worse and worse.
02:52:31.000 Oh no.
02:52:31.000 It was a Doberman.
02:52:32.000 Doberman Pinchot.
02:52:33.000 Oh my God.
02:52:33.000 And it got to the point where it was growling and barking at us in the house.
02:52:37.000 It was just like scared of everybody and growling and barking.
02:52:39.000 Oh, man.
02:52:40.000 We were talking to her, like, what's wrong?
02:52:42.000 Like, what's wrong? 0.99
02:52:44.000 And then we brought it to the vet, and they're like, this dog's fucked. 0.99
02:52:48.000 Really? 0.99
02:52:49.000 It's got distemper.
02:52:50.000 Is that like a chemical thing?
02:52:52.000 It's some sort of a disease they can get from other dogs.
02:52:55.000 And a lot of times, dogs that didn't have their shots, they get it, and it can make some dogs behave very erratically.
02:53:03.000 And you can't correct that?
02:53:05.000 I don't think they can.
02:53:07.000 At least they couldn't when I had a dog.
02:53:09.000 Canine distemper.
02:53:11.000 Contagious and serious viral illness with no known cure.
02:53:15.000 Disease affects dogs and certain species of wildlife such as raccoons, wolves, foxes, and skunks.
02:53:20.000 Common house pet.
02:53:21.000 The ferret is also a carrier of this virus.
02:53:23.000 Oh my god.
02:53:24.000 So that was in your house.
02:53:25.000 Yeah, well, it's not as bad as rabies, but for this one dog, whatever kind of distemper he had, it was major symptoms include high fever, reddened eyes, watery discharge for the nose and eyes, an infected dog become lethargic and tired and usually become anorexic.
02:53:42.000 I had another puppy that had this as well, and his thing, well, he didn't have this, but he had something that gave him seizures, and they thought it was distemper.
02:53:51.000 See, fifth, seizures, paralysis, and attacks of hysteria.
02:53:54.000 See, that was what my dog had.
02:53:57.000 He had the hysteria part.
02:53:59.000 I don't know if he was lethargic.
02:54:00.000 He was just sitting there, even though he was growling.
02:54:03.000 It wasn't like he was trying to get us, but he wasn't doing good.
02:54:06.000 Death may result in two to five weeks after the initial infection.
02:54:10.000 That's sad.
02:54:11.000 Yeah.
02:54:11.000 Do you have one dog?
02:54:12.000 I have three.
02:54:13.000 You have three?
02:54:14.000 Yeah.
02:54:14.000 Do you think it's mean to have one dog?
02:54:18.000 No.
02:54:18.000 No, it's not mean if you're around the dog and you hang out with him.
02:54:20.000 Yeah, we hang with him.
02:54:22.000 She gets a lot of love.
02:54:22.000 Dogs like dogs, though.
02:54:24.000 They do like dogs.
02:54:25.000 They're pack animals, you know?
02:54:26.000 Yeah.
02:54:26.000 They have a good time together.
02:54:27.000 Oh my god, we had this little thing came over to the house. 1.00
02:54:30.000 Yeah.
02:54:30.000 The dog was so happy.
02:54:31.000 Yeah.
02:54:32.000 My daughter's got a chihuahua. 1.00
02:54:33.000 And so the Chihuahua and the Golden get together and they go run around and play. 0.99
02:54:39.000 And it's like they have the fucking best time. 0.99
02:54:42.000 Like, it's a party! 0.99
02:54:44.000 It's constant.
02:54:45.000 They could go for hours.
02:54:46.000 They're just running around in circles, barking at each other.
02:54:48.000 I know.
02:54:49.000 I mean, I'm like, you know, it's a lot of work having each other.
02:54:53.000 I'm like, one's enough.
02:54:54.000 But when I saw them together, I had a little weakness, like, maybe this would be cool.
02:54:57.000 Especially if you have a good-sized yard when you run around.
02:55:00.000 Yeah.
02:55:01.000 Yeah.
02:55:01.000 It's an okay size.
02:55:02.000 The crazy thing is that that used to be a wolf.
02:55:05.000 Even like an English bulldog.
02:55:06.000 Yeah.
02:55:07.000 Somewhere along the line, that was a wolf.
02:55:09.000 That was a wolf.
02:55:09.000 They all come from that.
02:55:11.000 Yeah, and then the wolves slowly got closer to us.
02:55:14.000 By the campfire, we had food.
02:55:16.000 We'd chuck a little food at him.
02:55:17.000 He'd be cool to us.
02:55:17.000 The other wolves, so back off.
02:55:18.000 These guys got food.
02:55:19.000 They're cool.
02:55:19.000 They're cool.
02:55:20.000 They're cool, man.
02:55:21.000 Then they became more and more submissive, they think, over time.
02:55:24.000 Right.
02:55:24.000 The ones that were more submissive were more accepted, and they bred more, and then their ears started to flop.
02:55:29.000 Right.
02:55:29.000 They were more submissive versus the ears up, listening around for prey.
02:55:34.000 Right, right.
02:55:35.000 Instead, they became this thing.
02:55:37.000 Wow.
02:55:38.000 We came to know as dogs.
02:55:39.000 Wow.
02:55:39.000 It's pretty great.
02:55:40.000 It's fucking strange, man. 0.96
02:55:42.000 It is strange. 0.99
02:55:43.000 It is weird.
02:55:43.000 You know, they didn't know that before they started doing those DNA tests on dogs.
02:55:48.000 They thought that they would find that dogs came from a bunch of different wild canids, like a bunch of different wild dog species.
02:55:55.000 Yeah, that's what I would think.
02:55:55.000 Nope.
02:55:56.000 All from North America, too.
02:55:58.000 Because they're so different looking.
02:55:59.000 It's crazy.
02:56:00.000 Crazy, man.
02:56:02.000 Well, so are people, though, right? 0.92
02:56:03.000 I mean, that's the weird thing about life. 1.00
02:56:06.000 That's one of the reasons why it's so easy for us to gather up into these stupid tribes. 0.99
02:56:11.000 It's because visually we look so much different. 0.98
02:56:13.000 I mean, people from South Korea look way different than people from Africa, and it's very different to not think of us all as the same.
02:56:21.000 Yeah.
02:56:21.000 So you tribal up with the people that look similar to you because you're scared of the other.
02:56:25.000 And not even the look.
02:56:26.000 There's probably, like within us, there's traits that you don't even know that you're recognizing.
02:56:31.000 Like when I'm around Italians, there's something about it that's comforting. 0.99
02:56:37.000 For sure.
02:56:37.000 You know?
02:56:38.000 Yeah. 0.92
02:56:39.000 That's why it's like really funny, not funny, but it's really odd when like super light-skinned black people are like really radical black activists. 0.99
02:56:49.000 You're like, hey, are you making up for something here? 0.67
02:56:55.000 Like what's going on here?
02:56:56.000 Is this just how you actually feel or you like really want to gain acceptance in this tribe?
02:57:02.000 Super hardcore.
02:57:03.000 Every tribe's been knocking you back. 0.95
02:57:05.000 You have to like show your, you know, because it's one thing that a friend of mine said who's black, he was talking about black racism, and he was like, one of the weirdest racisms that I've had to accept is dark people versus like lighter black skinned people.
02:57:21.000 Light skinned, yeah.
02:57:22.000 Light skinned people will oftentimes be really racist to dark skinned black people. 0.97
02:57:27.000 Interesting. 0.94
02:57:28.000 And I was like, really?
02:57:29.000 Oh, yeah.
02:57:30.000 Yeah, there's a big difference.
02:57:32.000 Big difference between how light-skinned black people feel about dark-skinned black people and vice versa. 0.97
02:57:39.000 Dark-skinned black people racism within black people. 0.98
02:57:43.000 I was like, whoa! 0.97
02:57:43.000 Yeah, that's a whole mindset that I could never try and understand. 0.97
02:57:49.000 But just give people enough time and they'll eventually find a group to belong to that they, even inside the group, like if you ask the black people who are light-skinned, do they identify more with the dark-skinned black people or white people, they'd probably see more of the dark-skinned black people.
02:58:03.000 This is obviously a great generalization about these people that have these issues with this thing.
02:58:07.000 Right.
02:58:08.000 They probably, in comparison to white people, like, well, I'm not that. 0.88
02:58:12.000 I'm not this person.
02:58:13.000 I'm one of these.
02:58:14.000 I'm more like that guy.
02:58:15.000 But this guy's not like me, because, you know, he's that, and I'm this, and then this is my group, and that's their group.
02:58:21.000 You know, so even inside groups, we have these factions, you know?
02:58:26.000 Hardline Republicans.
02:58:27.000 Right.
02:58:28.000 You know, versus, I'm more on the libertarian side, where I'm alt-right.
02:58:31.000 Right.
02:58:32.000 You know?
02:58:32.000 Exactly.
02:58:33.000 Just check my profile, I'll let you know what it's all about.
02:58:36.000 I'm vegan athlete, super wonder person.
02:58:39.000 You know?
02:58:40.000 I mean, that's really kind of what it is in a lot of ways.
02:58:43.000 I mean, there's good ideas behind all these things, notwithstanding.
02:58:46.000 Especially, like, when you're talking about idea, not race, right?
02:58:49.000 Like, good ideas behind being a vegan.
02:58:51.000 Even good ideas behind, like, a lot of right-wing Republican ideas.
02:58:54.000 Like, what they're trying to do is noble.
02:58:56.000 Right.
02:58:57.000 Yeah, no, absolutely.
02:58:58.000 In some cases.
02:58:59.000 Yes, it's the extremes.
02:59:00.000 It's the extremes.
02:59:01.000 It's saying that my team can never be wrong in any regard.
02:59:05.000 And it's just being on a team, period.
02:59:07.000 Yeah.
02:59:07.000 People want to belong.
02:59:09.000 You've got to accept a lot of bullshit if you want to join a team. 0.99
02:59:11.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:59:12.000 Billy dropped the ball, that fuck, now we lose? 1.00
02:59:14.000 Screw that guy. 1.00
02:59:15.000 He's one of us? 0.96
02:59:16.000 Yeah.
02:59:16.000 I didn't even know Billy.
02:59:17.000 Twat. 0.99
02:59:18.000 Get him out of here, that twat. 0.99
02:59:20.000 Twat's the best word ever. 0.99
02:59:21.000 Yeah, twat's a great word.
02:59:23.000 Twat is so good.
02:59:24.000 That Sargon of Akkad guy was trying to tell me I was saying it wrong.
02:59:28.000 It's not twat. 0.99
02:59:30.000 That it's twat. 0.96
02:59:31.000 Twat?
02:59:31.000 Twat.
02:59:32.000 But he's out of his mind.
02:59:33.000 Twat.
02:59:33.000 How do you say swat?
02:59:34.000 Like swat team.
02:59:35.000 Swat. 1.00
02:59:36.000 You don't say swat, you fucking English cocksucker. 1.00
02:59:40.000 It doesn't have the impact. 1.00
02:59:41.000 Shut your mouth. 0.98
02:59:41.000 First of all, the idea of English people telling us how to use their language is offensive. 0.98
02:59:46.000 That is really rude.
02:59:48.000 You can't tell me how to speak your language, English person. 1.00
02:59:55.000 Back off.
02:59:56.000 We own it now.
02:59:57.000 My favorite variation of English, though, is Australian.
02:59:59.000 Because it's a very distinctive version of English.
03:00:02.000 It's not American. 0.81
03:00:03.000 Yeah.
03:00:03.000 You know?
03:00:04.000 It's distinctive.
03:00:05.000 Oh, completely.
03:00:06.000 They're off on their own island making up their own rules.
03:00:09.000 Like my friend Adam, my friend Adam Greentree, who's, by the way, has the most exciting Instagram story in the world right now.
03:00:16.000 He's been living by himself in the backcountry, bowhunting in Colorado.
03:00:22.000 Oh, yeah.
03:00:22.000 He totally struck out in Colorado.
03:00:25.000 20 days.
03:00:25.000 I started watching because I heard you talk about him.
03:00:28.000 He bailed on Colorado and now he's moved into the grizzly infested mountains of Montana.
03:00:37.000 But not only that, he documented Officially documented grizzly bears in Colorado, where people are saying there's no grizzlies in Colorado, and there's even a website that deals with it and says that people who say they sighted a grizzly bear in Colorado, it's oftentimes like Sasquatch,
03:00:53.000 like you think you saw it.
03:00:54.000 No, he is an experienced outdoorsman who's been a bowhunter his whole life.
03:00:59.000 He knows what he's looking at, and he found several grizzly bears in the mountains, deep in the backcountry of Colorado.
03:01:05.000 And recorded it?
03:01:05.000 16 miles in, yeah.
03:01:07.000 I mean, they're little blobs moving around in the background. 0.85
03:01:08.000 It's hard to see.
03:01:09.000 Right.
03:01:09.000 But they're big.
03:01:11.000 Yeah. 0.99
03:01:11.000 And he said that is absolutely 100% a fucking mountain grizzly bear. 0.99
03:01:15.000 So they're moving into Colorado, too. 0.99
03:01:17.000 He's been in the woods a long time.
03:01:18.000 20 days.
03:01:19.000 And now he's back.
03:01:20.000 He got in a car, he rented a car, took him a day.
03:01:22.000 He drove into, I think, Wyoming or Idaho, whatever's connected to Montana.
03:01:30.000 I think it's Wyoming.
03:01:31.000 No.
03:01:31.000 Idaho.
03:01:32.000 I think it's Idaho, yeah.
03:01:33.000 He drove into Idaho, and now he's making his way down from Idaho into the parks in Idaho, and he's hiking into Montana, into grizzly-infested backcountry.
03:01:42.000 And Wyoming.
03:01:42.000 He's coming from the south.
03:01:43.000 It's fucking scary shit, man. 1.00
03:01:46.000 There's grizzlies everywhere up there. 1.00
03:01:47.000 He has a family?
03:01:49.000 Yes, he does.
03:01:50.000 And he's just out in the woods?
03:01:51.000 Don't be scared.
03:01:53.000 I'm not scared.
03:01:54.000 I'm envious of how he gets out of his house to go to the woods for that one.
03:01:58.000 For 20 days.
03:01:59.000 20 days plus, it's going to be a full month.
03:02:00.000 I don't know if my wife would let me.
03:02:03.000 Well, if you were updating your Instagram story constantly.
03:02:07.000 See, that's my theory as to why he's doing this.
03:02:09.000 This way, it lets everybody know where he is all the time.
03:02:11.000 Everybody knows he's okay.
03:02:13.000 Versus him just disappearing off the map for 30 days.
03:02:16.000 Right.
03:02:16.000 It is so interesting that you could be out there and Be able to film stuff and communicate and look at maps.
03:02:22.000 He's a savage.
03:02:23.000 Not a lot of people can do it that way.
03:02:24.000 Even most bow hunters will tell you, like, man, I'll go for a backcountry camping trip for like seven days by myself or ten days, but this guy's just gone so deep.
03:02:34.000 And by yourself.
03:02:35.000 By himself.
03:02:36.000 That's the thing.
03:02:37.000 I mean, even having one other friend makes a big difference.
03:02:40.000 He ran out of food a while back, so you could see him getting skinnier and skinnier as time went on.
03:02:44.000 Then he had to go into town to get more food.
03:02:46.000 Oh my God.
03:02:47.000 Yeah, he ran out of food.
03:02:49.000 You see it in his face.
03:02:50.000 Like, his face is getting more gaunt.
03:02:52.000 His eyes are getting more sunken in.
03:02:53.000 It's like, whoa.
03:02:54.000 I saw him, like, exhausted at one point.
03:02:55.000 He was just, like, laying back.
03:02:57.000 So deep, man.
03:02:58.000 I mean, what he's doing...
03:02:59.000 He had to filter water through a piece of wet, like, old, rotting piece of wood.
03:03:06.000 He poured the water...
03:03:07.000 Because his filter was back at camp 16 miles away.
03:03:10.000 Because he had been running...
03:03:11.000 He'd been getting so much fresh water that was pumping right out of the ground from springs.
03:03:14.000 You could just drink that.
03:03:15.000 But when you come to a creek, like, you have to take a chance.
03:03:18.000 Yeah. 0.95
03:03:19.000 Because it could be Jardia, because beavers shit in the dam, and you get what they call beaver fever. 0.99
03:03:23.000 Oh, boy. 1.00
03:03:24.000 You shit your brains. 1.00
03:03:25.000 Like, rocket, projectile, broken fire hydrant diarrhea. 1.00
03:03:29.000 Just blah, blah, blah. 1.00
03:03:31.000 Where your body's like, hey, fuckhead. 1.00
03:03:33.000 Yeah, so I'm taking a sip and saying I might regret this in a couple days. 1.00
03:03:37.000 You might be dead. 0.99
03:03:38.000 Oh, man.
03:03:39.000 Yeah, he drinks a lot straight out of the ground.
03:03:41.000 And he just does, this is his gig?
03:03:43.000 Well, he has a company in Australia, and he's kind of his own boss, so he gets to decide that he goes on the road for 30 days at a time and do this.
03:03:52.000 Wow.
03:03:52.000 But he's a very famous professional bowhunter, too.
03:03:55.000 Wow.
03:03:56.000 Yeah, it's a crazy Insta story, if you're interested, to see what it's like for these guys that want to do these backcountry solo hunts.
03:04:03.000 But there he is.
03:04:04.000 Look at his face on the far left.
03:04:06.000 He's lost a lot of weight, man.
03:04:07.000 Yeah.
03:04:08.000 He's going to be shredded when he gets off the mountain.
03:04:10.000 Oh, man. 1.00
03:04:11.000 He's going to pose for a fucking calendar. 1.00
03:04:12.000 He's a handsome fellow, isn't he? 1.00
03:04:14.000 It's so funny.
03:04:16.000 It's amazing about just social media.
03:04:19.000 It's like you watch him, and he's out in the woods by himself.
03:04:23.000 Then the next story is...
03:04:25.000 Hey, my show.
03:04:27.000 I'm at my show at the Ice House.
03:04:28.000 It's really having a good time.
03:04:30.000 I know. 0.99
03:04:30.000 He's crazy. 0.99
03:04:31.000 He's pretty hardcore. 0.98
03:04:32.000 He has different lives.
03:04:34.000 Yeah.
03:04:34.000 You know?
03:04:35.000 But I was going to say, their version of the English language is the best.
03:04:38.000 Yeah.
03:04:38.000 Because he'll say, you know, well, I've got me tent.
03:04:40.000 I've got me bow over here.
03:04:41.000 I've got me water supply.
03:04:42.000 I'm all good.
03:04:44.000 Everything's me this, me that.
03:04:46.000 That to me is like my favorite version of the English language.
03:04:48.000 English sounds slightly cooler than American, but Australian is slightly cooler than English.
03:04:55.000 That's the most use of the English language.
03:04:59.000 Sounds a little reckless to me.
03:05:03.000 Do you think so?
03:05:04.000 It's a reckless language?
03:05:05.000 Yeah, they're all wound up. 0.97
03:05:09.000 Well, everything can kill them over there.
03:05:11.000 They've got to be wound up.
03:05:12.000 Yeah, they've got to be wound up. 0.99
03:05:13.000 Fucking snakes and spiders and crocodiles, and they're surrounded by sharks. 1.00
03:05:17.000 They're all out there on their own. 1.00
03:05:19.000 They're on their own.
03:05:19.000 Anyone attacks them?
03:05:20.000 There's no one there.
03:05:20.000 No one's going to help.
03:05:22.000 Yeah, I mean, how big is the Australian Army?
03:05:24.000 It's like 25 people, I think.
03:05:26.000 Well, the whole place is only the amount of people.
03:05:29.000 It's the same size as America, but the amount of people is the same as California.
03:05:33.000 Slightly less than California.
03:05:34.000 That sounds great.
03:05:36.000 Beautiful.
03:05:37.000 I was just saying this before, Jamie, that I think living in LA, I just feel like I'm going to end up being the cranky guy that can't be around people.
03:05:47.000 Right.
03:05:48.000 There's so many people around us all the time.
03:05:51.000 Yeah.
03:05:53.000 It's exhausting.
03:05:54.000 It is, but it's also energizing, right?
03:05:57.000 Somewhat, yeah.
03:05:57.000 When I come back from the woods, if I go somewhere, especially camping, and then you come back to civilization, you kind of appreciate restaurants and movie theaters.
03:06:09.000 Get some popcorn and watch a movie.
03:06:11.000 You just like being around it.
03:06:12.000 Maybe that's it.
03:06:12.000 You just need breaks from it.
03:06:14.000 Yeah, that's what I think.
03:06:15.000 I think the best of both worlds is both worlds.
03:06:18.000 Right. 1.00
03:06:19.000 I think just living by yourself in the woods like the Unabomber, like, what the fuck, dude? 0.99
03:06:22.000 I don't want to end up that way. 0.99
03:06:24.000 I'm out here alone with nature.
03:06:26.000 Just nature. 1.00
03:06:27.000 No fucking phones, pussy. 1.00
03:06:29.000 What's going on here, Jamie? 1.00
03:06:30.000 I can't do that.
03:06:31.000 Total military personnel, 81,000.
03:06:34.000 We have 81,000 military in my house.
03:06:37.000 I know.
03:06:40.000 The amount of military that we have in America.
03:06:43.000 What's the amount of military in America?
03:06:45.000 Let's guess.
03:06:46.000 Let's guess before we search.
03:06:48.000 How many military in the United States?
03:06:50.000 Military?
03:06:51.000 Military members.
03:06:52.000 We're not even going to include the Coast Guard.
03:06:55.000 You have to include the Coast Guard.
03:06:57.000 Alright, Navy, Coast Guard, Marines, Air Force, Army.
03:07:01.000 Four million.
03:07:03.000 Eighteen million.
03:07:06.000 70 million.
03:07:07.000 70?
03:07:08.000 I'm going crazy.
03:07:09.000 No.
03:07:09.000 3. 2.6.
03:07:11.000 2.3, rather.
03:07:12.000 Yeah, it wasn't so bad.
03:07:13.000 Total population, 323. Well, they're not including Mexicans. 1.00
03:07:17.000 Oh.
03:07:18.000 323 million.
03:07:19.000 Oh.
03:07:19.000 And then total military, 2,300.
03:07:22.000 Wow.
03:07:22.000 So less than 10%.
03:07:23.000 You know what's interesting about that number, man?
03:07:26.000 I remember when 250 million, when I was a kid, the population was 250. Because I remember thinking, me and my friends were sitting around, we were in high school, we were like, 250 million.
03:07:36.000 Yeah. 0.98
03:07:37.000 How the fuck are there that many people? 0.99
03:07:39.000 Yeah. 0.99
03:07:39.000 We were like, wow. 0.99
03:07:40.000 That's so many.
03:07:41.000 Now it's almost a hundred million more.
03:07:43.000 My God.
03:07:45.000 In the world?
03:07:46.000 Like billions more.
03:07:47.000 Seven billion.
03:07:47.000 But what was it then?
03:07:48.000 I think in like the 80s when I was in high school.
03:07:52.000 Yeah.
03:07:52.000 I bet there was...
03:07:53.000 Three and a half?
03:07:54.000 Yeah.
03:07:55.000 I bet there was like three.
03:07:56.000 Yeah.
03:07:56.000 I believe that.
03:07:59.000 We've learned to survive too well.
03:08:02.000 It's amazing.
03:08:03.000 So many people.
03:08:04.000 We've got all this food shipped into these cities.
03:08:07.000 And medicines.
03:08:09.000 Factory farming and medicine.
03:08:10.000 We're living longer.
03:08:12.000 Living much longer.
03:08:15.000 Longer.
03:08:15.000 So many people.
03:08:17.000 During the last eclipse, that's the stat that blew my mind.
03:08:20.000 During the last time we had an eclipse, total eclipse like that on our continent, It was 100 years ago.
03:08:28.000 100 years ago, there were fewer people in the whole state of California than who live in LA today.
03:08:35.000 Oh, it must have been nice.
03:08:37.000 Oh, it must have been glorious.
03:08:38.000 You could have got to the comedy store in like 10 minutes.
03:08:40.000 On a bike.
03:08:41.000 Yeah.
03:08:42.000 Just roll down Laurel Canyon.
03:08:44.000 Oh, it would have been so sweet.
03:08:46.000 Oh, my God.
03:08:47.000 LA was like a small town. 1.00
03:08:49.000 So many damn people. 0.99
03:08:50.000 1917, there's 3 million people. 1.00
03:08:54.000 In California.
03:08:55.000 In the whole state.
03:08:56.000 That's way less than L.A. L.A.'s like 20 million.
03:09:00.000 Is that amazing?
03:09:01.000 In the whole state. 1.00
03:09:03.000 And they were probably like, there's so many fucking people here. 1.00
03:09:06.000 This is so gross. 1.00
03:09:07.000 Right, I can't go to town one more time running through those assholes. 1.00
03:09:11.000 What is today Texas? 1.00
03:09:12.000 What does Texas have today?
03:09:14.000 Go to the very end here.
03:09:16.000 Texas has 27 million.
03:09:18.000 Canada, the entire country of Canada, 36 million.
03:09:21.000 Oh my god.
03:09:22.000 California, 39 million. 1.00
03:09:23.000 So California has more people than fucking Canada. 0.99
03:09:26.000 So I'm not going crazy. 0.99
03:09:27.000 It's a real thing.
03:09:27.000 I'm feeling it.
03:09:28.000 No, it's a real thing.
03:09:29.000 Yeah.
03:09:29.000 Well, that's also one of the reasons why California, or rather Canada, the people are so nice.
03:09:34.000 They're not as overwhelmed.
03:09:36.000 Yeah, they're surprised to see you. 0.99
03:09:38.000 See that bear on the fucking California sign? 0.99
03:09:41.000 You know what's crazy? 1.00
03:09:43.000 Bears like that are extinct in California.
03:09:45.000 What is that?
03:09:46.000 It's a grizzly.
03:09:47.000 They used to have grizzlies in California.
03:09:49.000 In fact, the last grizzly...
03:10:09.000 We used to have giant, huge bears.
03:10:13.000 In, like, the 1800s?
03:10:14.000 I think it was then.
03:10:15.000 I think it was the 1800s.
03:10:16.000 But they killed them because they were killing all the people.
03:10:18.000 Like, they were killing us.
03:10:20.000 Right.
03:10:20.000 It was us or them.
03:10:21.000 But meanwhile, it's them.
03:10:22.000 We put on the flag.
03:10:23.000 Like, we won, but we miss you, buddy, so we put you on the flag.
03:10:26.000 We love you. 0.99
03:10:27.000 We love looking at you, but you've got to stop eating us, and so we had to shoot you all. 0.99
03:10:31.000 You know what's lame about that? 0.99
03:10:34.000 It's similar to what happened with the Native Americans. 0.89
03:10:36.000 But it's not.
03:10:37.000 It is.
03:10:37.000 A lot of people think it is.
03:10:38.000 You know what killed most of the Native Americans in this country?
03:10:42.000 Disease.
03:10:43.000 Smallpox.
03:10:43.000 A bunch of diseases.
03:10:45.000 90%.
03:10:45.000 That we brought to them.
03:10:46.000 Yeah.
03:10:47.000 Isn't that crazy?
03:10:47.000 90% of them were killed, wiped out by disease.
03:10:50.000 Yeah.
03:10:50.000 I always thought we killed them all.
03:10:52.000 We killed a lot of them, for sure. 0.99
03:10:53.000 Not we. 0.99
03:10:54.000 I shouldn't say we.
03:10:55.000 I'm the grandchild of immigrants.
03:10:57.000 Yeah, exactly.
03:10:58.000 We were in Italy at the time, enjoying ourselves.
03:11:01.000 The Tenaya Lake in Yosemite is named after Chief Tenaya, who we killed his son in front of him.
03:11:15.000 We should stop saying we. 0.98
03:11:16.000 I know.
03:11:17.000 It definitely wasn't us.
03:11:18.000 I feel guilty.
03:11:19.000 I had that in my act for a while.
03:11:21.000 My daughter's like, why did we do that?
03:11:22.000 I'm like, easy with the we.
03:11:24.000 We were on Vespas and eating spaghetti.
03:11:27.000 We're lovers.
03:11:30.000 And then named the lake after him. 0.98
03:11:32.000 Like, killed his kid in front of him, made him suffer, killed him, and then named the lake after him.
03:11:37.000 It's like, it absolves us of the guilt.
03:11:40.000 And we're just like, oh, Tenaya, there was a... 0.99
03:11:42.000 There was some horrible, horrible shit going on back then. 1.00
03:11:45.000 Horrible! 1.00
03:11:46.000 All over the world.
03:11:47.000 I mean, and even before that, like, the accounts of what Columbus did when they encountered the natives.
03:11:51.000 And then, you know, they were trying to get gold out of these people and slaughtered these people.
03:11:55.000 Slaughtered! 1.00
03:11:55.000 I mean, it's a serial killer type shit. 1.00
03:11:58.000 Yeah. 1.00
03:11:58.000 Yeah. 1.00
03:11:58.000 I mean, we used to have Columbus Day. 1.00
03:12:01.000 I guess we still do.
03:12:02.000 Not in California.
03:12:04.000 They're getting rid of it?
03:12:04.000 They voted it out.
03:12:06.000 Yeah.
03:12:06.000 That's a good idea.
03:12:07.000 But in New York, you know, Columbus Circle, and they still have someone to face the Columbus statue in Central Park the other day.
03:12:15.000 Stop doing that, man.
03:12:16.000 Just like you gotta stop.
03:12:17.000 You can't deface Genghis Khan's statue.
03:12:20.000 It's one thing to revere and worship these people, and we definitely shouldn't do that anymore.
03:12:24.000 But those statues are history.
03:12:26.000 We should look at it, but understand what we're looking at.
03:12:30.000 We're not worshiping a statue of Christopher Columbus, but it is a fascinating thing to know that this monster got in a boat and sailed across the ocean.
03:12:37.000 If it wasn't for him, likely wouldn't be a whole population here, or him and the people that he went with.
03:12:42.000 I think you gotta add some new statues.
03:12:45.000 Yeah.
03:12:45.000 That's a good move.
03:12:46.000 That's a good move.
03:12:47.000 Yeah.
03:12:47.000 Of other people that had a positive impact on stuff, you know?
03:12:51.000 You know what's fucked up, though, about a lot of these Civil War statues that people are wanting to tear down now and destroy?
03:12:56.000 Yeah.
03:12:56.000 What's fucked up was when you look at when those things were built, those things weren't built, like, way before the Civil Rights Movement and they're a relic of an ancient past.
03:13:05.000 No. 0.87
03:13:05.000 Right. 0.87
03:13:05.000 A lot of them were built in response to the Civil Rights Movement. 0.87
03:13:09.000 So they really are racist in origin.
03:13:11.000 Yeah.
03:13:11.000 Yeah.
03:13:11.000 A lot of the Robert E. Lee ones and all that shit, where people were like, you know, we're gonna take back the world, and the South's gonna rise again.
03:13:17.000 Yeah, no, they weren't around, right, since the 1800s.
03:13:21.000 It was like 1965. And a lot of them are made really quickly and shittily in response to the civil rights movement, and that they were made out of, like, copper and bronze and shit, because it was easier to do than stone.
03:13:32.000 Oh, really? 0.95
03:13:33.000 Yeah.
03:13:33.000 Yeah.
03:13:34.000 No, that's not good.
03:13:35.000 No, we had to create some other people.
03:13:37.000 What's that?
03:13:38.000 It's like a visualization of the number of monuments that were erected and what happened.
03:13:44.000 These are all Civil War monuments?
03:13:46.000 Yeah. 1.00
03:13:47.000 Look at that shit. 1.00
03:13:48.000 NAACP was founded. 1.00
03:13:50.000 Giant spike in Civil War monuments.
03:13:52.000 Wow.
03:13:53.000 Look at that, man.
03:13:54.000 That's crazy.
03:13:55.000 Yeah, it was a retaliation.
03:13:56.000 Red Summer race riots.
03:13:57.000 Giant spike in Civil War monuments.
03:14:00.000 Tulsa race riots.
03:14:01.000 Giant spike in Civil War statues.
03:14:04.000 That's nuts, man.
03:14:05.000 Yeah.
03:14:06.000 Like, you could track it.
03:14:08.000 There's a bigger version of this too I was trying to find right now, but I just got this little chunk of it.
03:14:12.000 That's spooky!
03:14:13.000 Yeah!
03:14:14.000 Because no one's talking about that when they're talking about keeping these things up and they represent our heritage.
03:14:18.000 I understand what you're saying, but...
03:14:22.000 Worshiping this is a real problem because you got to realize what was the motivation to put...
03:14:26.000 Like, why is it okay though for me?
03:14:28.000 Why do I look at it and go, I have a problem with this because they did it during the racist 1960s or during the early 1900s and the NAACP was created.
03:14:38.000 I would accept it better if it was 200 years old instead of 100. Like, what's wrong with me?
03:14:42.000 Like, why do I care?
03:14:44.000 Right.
03:14:45.000 What do you mean, why do you care?
03:14:46.000 I mean, why is it more offensive that it was created by racists in the 1960s than if it was created by racists 200 years ago?
03:14:56.000 Maybe it's because it's a direct line for people alive right now.
03:15:00.000 Yeah, exactly.
03:15:02.000 Yeah, that's dirty.
03:15:03.000 It's dirty when you look at the actual spikes.
03:15:05.000 Yeah.
03:15:07.000 George Wallace.
03:15:08.000 It jumped up during the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr. When George Wallace is blocking the schools.
03:15:14.000 Ooh, jumped up. 0.97
03:15:15.000 Look at that.
03:15:16.000 That's weird.
03:15:17.000 Yeah.
03:15:18.000 Detroit race riots.
03:15:19.000 Boom! 0.99
03:15:19.000 We got a little spike. 0.99
03:15:20.000 Yeah.
03:15:21.000 Hanging on to it.
03:15:22.000 Not so fast.
03:15:24.000 Teams at war.
03:15:25.000 Yeah.
03:15:25.000 More teams.
03:15:26.000 Act out of kindness.
03:15:27.000 That's not an act out of kindness.
03:15:28.000 That's not putting a statue up there out of love.
03:15:32.000 Do you ever think, though, that those people that were doing all this stuff back then, they really didn't have a direct connection with the world the way we have today? 0.98
03:15:40.000 And then one of the reasons why we're seeing all these people tearing these things down now is because we all have a direct connection with each other, and we realize that, hey, these Civil War statues, they're fucking horrible. 0.89
03:15:50.000 Like, what the Civil War was was horrible. 0.94
03:15:52.000 Right. 0.99
03:15:53.000 Like, saying that it's a part of your culture, this is horseshit. 0.99
03:15:55.000 Like, no, this is a part of a terrible attempted genocide on black people, demonizing to the point where they were the other and it was okay to enslave them for hundreds of years. 0.98
03:16:06.000 No, you could live in New York State and not have any idea, really, what was going on in the South at the time.
03:16:13.000 No, no, no.
03:16:14.000 You don't understand.
03:16:14.000 The Civil War was about economics.
03:16:17.000 Yeah.
03:16:17.000 I've seen that argument too, but I've seen that argument torn apart.
03:16:21.000 If there was social media back then, do you think slavery would have even existed?
03:16:25.000 No.
03:16:25.000 And here's the thing.
03:16:26.000 Nobody wants slavery today. 1.00
03:16:27.000 If you do, you're a cunt. 0.99
03:16:29.000 And two, it doesn't mean that, like, when you guys define yourself by a war that you lost, and the war had a big part of what the war was about with slavery, that's a giant problem. 1.00
03:16:39.000 It's a big problem.
03:16:40.000 It's a giant problem in how the world looks at us, and looks at you, and the way you look at yourself.
03:16:46.000 Like, you're...
03:16:47.000 Yeah. 1.00
03:16:48.000 You're, like, justifying some of the most horrific shit in human history. 0.99
03:16:53.000 So far from kindness. 0.99
03:16:54.000 In American history.
03:16:55.000 Yeah.
03:16:55.000 That's not out of kindness.
03:16:56.000 Slavery.
03:16:57.000 They actually live better.
03:16:59.000 I heard that argument.
03:17:00.000 They actually live better as slaves.
03:17:02.000 Oh, gee, that's weird. 0.99
03:17:03.000 How strange is it that people lived better when you fed them and they lived in fucking cages than when they were released with no skills and no education and couldn't read and had to repopulate. 0.99
03:17:13.000 Oh, my God. 0.99
03:17:13.000 And in a country that they don't even... 0.99
03:17:15.000 It's not even a country of their origin.
03:17:17.000 Yeah, as you're putting up a statue on your way out the door. 0.99
03:17:20.000 Of a fucking general who fought to keep slavery alive. 0.99
03:17:24.000 Let's move on. 0.99
03:17:25.000 It doesn't mean that the South isn't awesome, folks.
03:17:28.000 It doesn't mean that you're not awesome.
03:17:29.000 Yeah, but let's move forward.
03:17:32.000 Stop with the teams.
03:17:33.000 Here's the problem, right? 0.99
03:17:34.000 What do you do about old Leonard Skinner albums with that fucking flag? 0.99
03:17:40.000 What do you do? 0.99
03:17:40.000 What does that flag represent to the Dukes of Hazzard now? 0.99
03:17:43.000 Yeah, I know.
03:17:44.000 Right?
03:17:45.000 Yeah, I know.
03:17:46.000 O'Neal Young.
03:17:48.000 It's tricky.
03:17:50.000 It's like all things.
03:17:51.000 It's not that black and white.
03:17:53.000 You can't absolute that. 1.00
03:17:54.000 Because the South has some awesome shit. 0.99
03:17:56.000 Well, you also don't want to... 1.00
03:17:57.000 There is a danger in wiping out history so we don't learn from it.
03:18:01.000 You can't do that either.
03:18:02.000 You can't just pretend this thing didn't exist and that there's remnants of it still around.
03:18:07.000 You need to be educated of...
03:18:10.000 If we're going to learn from history, you need to educate yourself about it.
03:18:13.000 Yeah, absolutely.
03:18:14.000 So you can't just sweep it all under the rug and think, okay, if we don't see it, it didn't exist.
03:18:19.000 Yeah.
03:18:20.000 Yeah, absolutely.
03:18:21.000 You know. 1.00
03:18:22.000 And on that note, Tom Papa, let's bring this bitch home. 1.00
03:18:25.000 This cigar was so nice. 0.99
03:18:26.000 Very good, right?
03:18:27.000 So great.
03:18:28.000 What's it called?
03:18:30.000 Oliva.
03:18:31.000 Oliva.
03:18:31.000 Oliva.
03:18:32.000 Oliva.
03:18:33.000 Oliva.
03:18:33.000 Hopefully created by highly skilled, well compensated craftsmen and women.
03:18:39.000 Crafts women. 0.99
03:18:40.000 Are you going on the road for a bit?
03:18:43.000 On the road again.
03:18:44.000 Cranking it out?
03:18:45.000 I'm doing the Comedy Store Saturday night.
03:18:47.000 I'm gone most of next week.
03:18:50.000 And then I'm banging out a bunch of shows.
03:18:53.000 Woo! 0.99
03:18:54.000 Nice.
03:18:55.000 October 6th, Vegas, Las Vegas, Nevada, ladies and gentlemen. 0.99
03:18:57.000 At the motherfucking Mirage! 0.97
03:19:00.000 I'm gonna be gone for about a month. 1.00
03:19:02.000 Where you going, bitch? 1.00
03:19:03.000 Everywhere. 1.00
03:19:04.000 TomPapa.com?
03:19:05.000 Yeah, that's where all my dates are. 1.00
03:19:07.000 Oh, shit. 0.99
03:19:08.000 Pacific Northwest. 1.00
03:19:09.000 The South.
03:19:10.000 The Northeast. 0.99
03:19:11.000 And if you have not seen, Tom Papa is one goddamn hilarious stand-up comedian. 1.00
03:19:16.000 So go out and see him live, you fucks! 0.99
03:19:18.000 I'm glad we got this in. 1.00
03:19:19.000 This was a nice treat.
03:19:20.000 I didn't think I'd see you for a while. 0.98
03:19:22.000 Fucking fun, man. 0.96
03:19:23.000 You're always the best. 0.99
03:19:23.000 And I got some elk for you. 0.99
03:19:24.000 Ah.
03:19:25.000 Here we go.
03:19:26.000 You're the best.
03:19:26.000 Bye, guys.
03:19:27.000 See ya.
03:19:27.000 Bye.
03:19:29.000 Girls, too.
03:19:30.000 Bye, girls, too.