The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #1012 - Brendan Schaub

00:00:00.000 Oh, false flag.

00:00:02.000 Five, four, three, two...

00:00:06.000 Yes!

00:00:09.000 Yes, ladies and gentlemen!

00:00:10.000 Yes!

00:00:11.000 Yes!

00:00:12.000 We're here.

00:00:13.000 I'm sorry we didn't go live earlier, folks.

00:00:15.000 I tweeted it 20 minutes ago.

00:00:16.000 We just said a bunch of shit we could never talk to you about.

00:00:19.000 Gossip.

00:00:20.000 A lot of it had to do with dicks.

00:00:23.000 As usual.

00:00:24.000 Well, of course, when Shob's on, it's about dicks.

00:00:29.000 Gotta do what you gotta do.

00:00:30.000 Dicks and gossip. 0.83

00:00:32.000 Speaking of dicks, that fucking thing you're driving around.

00:00:37.000 You're driving around a kid's toy all around LA. That's so crazy.

00:00:41.000 Mr. Fuckboy toy.

00:00:42.000 That is a...

00:00:43.000 Dude, I was...

00:00:45.000 Because I came straight from the airport.

00:00:46.000 Tell people what it is.

00:00:48.000 It's a slingshot, so it's three wheelers.

00:00:52.000 So there's two wheels in the front, one in the back.

00:00:54.000 It looks like Bruce Wayne's Batmobile weird toy.

00:01:00.000 It looks like you shouldn't be able to drive on the street.

00:01:02.000 You're like, wait a minute.

00:01:03.000 How do you...

00:01:03.000 You could just drive that around?

00:01:05.000 I know.

00:01:06.000 How does that work?

00:01:07.000 Is that a car?

00:01:08.000 What is that?

00:01:09.000 I don't know what it is, but technically it's considered a motorcycle.

00:01:12.000 I have the helmet.

00:01:13.000 I wear the helmet sometimes.

00:01:16.000 Kids, if you're listening, definitely wear a helmet when you have it.

00:01:18.000 But I parked at the airport because I don't want to park my Porsche at the airport overnight.

00:01:22.000 You parked that at the airport?

00:01:23.000 Yeah, I parked that at the airport.

00:01:24.000 And then I thought I'd have time to go home because I landed this morning from San Francisco.

00:01:30.000 I thought I'd have time to go home and change the cars out and then come here and take a shower or whatever, but I didn't.

00:01:35.000 So I was like, ah, fuck, I'll just drive all the way down there.

00:01:38.000 Go on the 405 over the hill.

00:01:40.000 It's lovely though.

00:01:42.000 The wind's in my face.

00:01:44.000 I got fucking 80s rock on.

00:01:47.000 I was feeling myself, man.

00:01:50.000 People are looking at me like, that's either the coolest guy I've ever seen or the biggest tool in the world.

00:01:57.000 It's fucking, hit me with your best shot!

00:01:59.000 I'm just fucking flying, man.

00:02:01.000 That's hilarious.

00:02:02.000 You were listening to Pat Bennett talk?

00:02:04.000 Yeah!

00:02:05.000 Just wild as shit, too.

00:02:09.000 Oh my god.

00:02:11.000 I love it, man.

00:02:11.000 Because, again, I would never get on a motorcycle.

00:02:13.000 Because this thing's so big, so it's a little safer.

00:02:15.000 A little safer.

00:02:17.000 People can see it.

00:02:18.000 Like, motorcycles get fucked up, can't see it. 0.84

00:02:20.000 That's a big part.

00:02:21.000 But this thing, I mean, winds in my face, I can see, like, everything, man.

00:02:26.000 Like a car, you're showing clothes.

00:02:27.000 This, I love it.

00:02:28.000 And the stick shift, like, I feel like I'm one with the road.

00:02:31.000 Oh, it's a real stick.

00:02:33.000 Oh, yeah.

00:02:33.000 With a clutch.

00:02:34.000 Oh, yeah.

00:02:35.000 That thing's nasty. 1.00

00:02:35.000 Isn't that much better? 1.00

00:02:36.000 It is and it isn't.

00:02:37.000 It's way better for driving.

00:02:39.000 I feel more, like I said, with the road.

00:02:42.000 I feel like Paul Newman or some shit, like a race car driver.

00:02:46.000 Especially with that thing.

00:02:47.000 That seems like the sweet spot between a motorcycle and a car.

00:02:50.000 Exactly.

00:02:50.000 That's why it makes sense.

00:02:51.000 And the gas mileage on it is super beastie.

00:02:53.000 It's awesome.

00:02:54.000 Oh, it probably weighs nothing, right?

00:02:55.000 Nothing.

00:02:56.000 A little engine in it.

00:02:57.000 It's fast.

00:02:58.000 What do you think it weighs?

00:02:59.000 Can you pick it up?

00:03:01.000 I don't know.

00:03:01.000 We should try after this.

00:03:02.000 Yeah, we should try to pick it up.

00:03:03.000 You and I can definitely pick it up.

00:03:04.000 If it weighs somewhere around, like a really light, light car is supposed to be the most fun to drive.

00:03:11.000 Let's say like a 1973 Porsche, because they're not that powerful, but they don't really need to be.

00:03:17.000 If a 1973 Porsche has like 200 horsepower, it's like, wow, this is a fast little car.

00:03:22.000 Because you can get them down to like 1,900 pounds.

00:03:26.000 That's insane.

00:03:27.000 My GT3 is 3,000 pounds, so think of that.

00:03:29.000 Which is nuts.

00:03:30.000 It's very light.

00:03:31.000 That's why when you're buying a Porsche, if you get the Targa, they're so much heavier.

00:03:36.000 Because they have that glass and they're heavy as fuck.

00:03:38.000 Yeah, all that bullshit going on up there.

00:03:40.000 They do look cool.

00:03:41.000 But I don't think they are, especially the old ones, I don't think they're the most rigid.

00:03:45.000 I don't think they had that.

00:03:47.000 I used to have an NSX that had a Targa top.

00:03:50.000 What do you got here?

00:03:50.000 1700. What year is that?

00:03:54.000 Oh, that's the slingshot.

00:03:56.000 I thought you were saying Porsche.

00:03:58.000 Wow, that's light.

00:04:00.000 That's like lighter than probably one of the lightest cars you could get.

00:04:04.000 Now, here's the stickler.

00:04:05.000 No airbags.

00:04:06.000 So if someone were to hit me...

00:04:08.000 That's no bueno.

00:04:09.000 I live life on the edge, though, fellas.

00:04:11.000 You're living on the edge!

00:04:13.000 How do you get away with having no airbags?

00:04:15.000 How does that work?

00:04:16.000 I'm not sure.

00:04:16.000 It's basically a motorcycle.

00:04:17.000 It's considered a motorcycle on the street.

00:04:19.000 But they say cops, if they see you without a helmet, they will pull you over and pound the car.

00:04:25.000 These things are so new, they think I'm like some...

00:04:27.000 Low budget, Alleycat, Bruce Wayne or something like that, they thumbs up.

00:04:32.000 I passed seven of them.

00:04:33.000 Even if you don't have a helmet on?

00:04:34.000 Yeah, and I go in carpool.

00:04:36.000 I go in carpool like an asshole.

00:04:38.000 Just blaring 80s rock.

00:04:39.000 Wait a minute, you go in carpool because it's a motorcycle?

00:04:42.000 Yeah, I'm like, well, classically it's a motorcycle.

00:04:44.000 Wow, you could go in the HOV in that?

00:04:47.000 I'm not sure, Joe.

00:04:49.000 There's really no rules.

00:04:50.000 I'm kind of in no man's land right now.

00:04:54.000 How funny is that?

00:04:55.000 You're allowed to go in the carpool lane in a fucking motorcycle.

00:04:57.000 That's the opposite of carpooling.

00:04:58.000 Isn't it weird?

00:04:59.000 It's so stupid.

00:05:00.000 Like, if you're carpooling on a motorcycle, you're putting somebody at risk.

00:05:03.000 Correct.

00:05:03.000 You know, if you get somebody on the back with you, every time I see a guy on a motorcycle, I see one person.

00:05:09.000 I see like, well, it's dangerous, but it's a guy on a motorcycle.

00:05:12.000 I see two people on a motorcycle.

00:05:13.000 I go, well, this is exponentially more dangerous.

00:05:17.000 And usually it's this girl on the back with like, she has Daisy Dukes on her or something. 0.97

00:05:21.000 Right.

00:05:21.000 And how good are you at adjusting with that extra 125 pounds in the back?

00:05:27.000 And her! 0.99

00:05:28.000 Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

00:05:28.000 Her.

00:05:29.000 That extra 125 pounds or whatever she weighs. 1.00

00:05:31.000 Let's go 140. Let's make her a real woman. 1.00

00:05:33.000 Let's say she's thick. 1.00

00:05:34.000 150 pounds.

00:05:35.000 So if you've got 150 pounds behind you, how good are you at correcting for that?

00:05:39.000 Have you really practiced that?

00:05:40.000 Are you good?

00:05:42.000 In the moment, when the shit hits the fan, do you make good decisions?

00:05:45.000 Do you even know if you do?

00:05:46.000 I think it's one of those things where, does it matter?

00:05:48.000 If you're both on a motorcycle and you have Daisy Dukes on and you crash?

00:05:52.000 Who gives a fuck?

00:05:53.000 Meat goes everywhere.

00:05:54.000 Super meaty.

00:05:55.000 Just chunks of meat hit the gravel and rip apart.

00:06:00.000 That's such a terrible way to go.

00:06:02.000 Barefoot in shorts.

00:06:04.000 No shirt.

00:06:05.000 Riding a motorcycle.

00:06:06.000 A real motorcycle.

00:06:07.000 And you could do that in Colorado.

00:06:09.000 You don't have to have a helmet.

00:06:11.000 I think Nevada has no helmet, too.

00:06:13.000 There's a bunch of places like that.

00:06:14.000 Arizona, no helmets.

00:06:15.000 I saw these dudes riding around in Harley-Davidson's, no helmet, and I was like, what?

00:06:19.000 It's kind of fair, though.

00:06:20.000 Like, if you're going to ride a motorcycle, how are you going to tell them to wear a helmet?

00:06:24.000 If they don't want to wear one, who gives a fuck?

00:06:26.000 Because that's the only thing that could save their life.

00:06:28.000 I know, but if they're on a motorcycle, you know what I'm saying?

00:06:30.000 Like, whatever, man.

00:06:31.000 This is how I like to live.

00:06:33.000 Well, there's an argument there, man.

00:06:35.000 For sure.

00:06:36.000 I don't think you should be able to tell people what to do, but I think guidelines for young people are very important because they make impulsive decisions, and you could protect more of them if you made a mandatory helmet law. 0.96

00:06:47.000 Maybe you should say, up to age 30, and over age 30, you do whatever the fuck you want.

00:06:52.000 Well, that's why they do it, because you can't have all those loopholes, can you?

00:06:55.000 Yeah, probably.

00:06:56.000 That makes sense.

00:06:56.000 I think the reason why they do it is for insurance.

00:06:58.000 I think insurance policies, they don't want to pay out for injuries and death and all that shit.

00:07:04.000 That's why they make seatbelt laws. 1.00

00:07:06.000 That's why they make helmet laws. 0.93

00:07:07.000 I don't really think it's to protect people.

00:07:09.000 I think protecting people is a consequence of protecting their money.

00:07:12.000 That makes sense.

00:07:13.000 Yeah.

00:07:14.000 Insurance on it.

00:07:14.000 How gross is that?

00:07:15.000 I'm pretty sure that's true, though.

00:07:16.000 That's life, son.

00:07:18.000 Business.

00:07:18.000 They realize how many people get injured.

00:07:21.000 And how much they have to pay.

00:07:23.000 So they factor it in.

00:07:25.000 They say, well, just lobby for more protection in the cars, more airbags, airbags mandatory, seatbelts, all that different stuff.

00:07:31.000 A lot of that is really under the guise of protecting us.

00:07:34.000 It's really protecting insurance companies' money.

00:07:37.000 It's nasty.

00:07:38.000 They say your odds of getting in a motorcycle accident, your first year of owning a motorcycle, are 99%.

00:07:48.000 99% of people get in some sort of, they wreck it, they do something, their first year of driving a motorcycle.

00:07:53.000 Wow.

00:07:54.000 That's why you don't buy a super fancy motorcycle your first year.

00:07:57.000 Did you ever see Dean Del Rey when he wiped?

00:07:59.000 No.

00:08:00.000 He wiped back when he was fat, Dean.

00:08:03.000 Dean got off sugar.

00:08:05.000 Completely, really impressive, actually.

00:08:07.000 He was always, it was never fat, but he was a guy who was not taking care of himself.

00:08:12.000 Sorry.

00:08:14.000 Not going to the gym.

00:08:15.000 And he got real thick.

00:08:17.000 And he was on a motorcycle and some crazy meth head cut him off.

00:08:20.000 Some lady. 1.00

00:08:21.000 It might have been a stolen car.

00:08:23.000 It was something like super sketchy.

00:08:25.000 But she crashed into him.

00:08:26.000 He wiped.

00:08:27.000 She never stopped.

00:08:28.000 And he just got toe up.

00:08:30.000 All of his side, his legs, his arm.

00:08:34.000 He just got...

00:08:35.000 Severely jacked.

00:08:36.000 Yeah, there he is.

00:08:37.000 Goddamn.

00:08:38.000 Yeah.

00:08:39.000 Dean Del Rey, living life.

00:08:41.000 There's a picture of the actual wound, if you could find it.

00:08:45.000 He put up the actual wound, especially on his back and side.

00:08:50.000 It's really bad.

00:08:51.000 I mean, he fucking...

00:08:51.000 I mean, if I'm going to crash, I want it to be because of my air, not some random lady not seeing me on meth.

00:08:57.000 Yeah, I mean, it ain't...

00:08:59.000 No, it's not in there.

00:09:00.000 There's a picture of it.

00:09:03.000 Oh.

00:09:04.000 Well, no worries.

00:09:06.000 But anyway, all that white shit all over his side, those bandages, I mean, that's how big the fucking giant tear is.

00:09:13.000 It goes, his skin is fucked up for like a good solid foot and a half.

00:09:17.000 How funny is this?

00:09:18.000 So in the NFL, NBA, NHL, motorcycles are illegal.

00:09:23.000 Once you sign that contract, you cannot drive a motorcycle.

00:09:26.000 I'm sure there's guys that have them, but legally it will void your contract.

00:09:30.000 In the UFC, you can win a motorcycle.

00:09:33.000 They give you motorcycles.

00:09:34.000 That's because of the deal with Harley.

00:09:35.000 I get it.

00:09:36.000 Isn't it weird?

00:09:37.000 Yeah, well, they're also like, I don't know.

00:09:39.000 I mean, you got to think of who was running the UFC, right?

00:09:42.000 It was owned by two guys, the Fertittas, that were independently very wealthy already and very wise business.

00:09:51.000 And they were fans.

00:09:52.000 So they decided, fuck this.

00:09:54.000 Let's just try to make this work.

00:09:56.000 Try to make it real.

00:09:57.000 They hired Dana fucking White to be the president, who's crazy. 0.65

00:10:01.000 And it all worked.

00:10:03.000 It was beautiful.

00:10:03.000 In a good way.

00:10:03.000 It was a good...

00:10:04.000 It's great.

00:10:05.000 It's great.

00:10:05.000 Like, his craziness is part of the reason why it's so appealing.

00:10:08.000 Like, when Oscar De La Hoya was talking shit about the Mayweather-McGregor fight, and he goes, he was like, LOL, is this guy sniffing coke again?

00:10:15.000 I love that.

00:10:16.000 Such a race.

00:10:18.000 Such a rose.

00:10:20.000 I was like, whoa.

00:10:21.000 Meanwhile, did he even go into the cross-dressing?

00:10:24.000 No.

00:10:25.000 Yeah, you're right.

00:10:26.000 See?

00:10:26.000 Not at all.

00:10:27.000 That's a jab.

00:10:27.000 He could have gotten nasty.

00:10:28.000 That's a jab.

00:10:29.000 He could have came with that straight right.

00:10:30.000 The sniffing coke.

00:10:31.000 A lot of people sniff coke.

00:10:33.000 All right, buddy.

00:10:34.000 Don't fucking...

00:10:35.000 But don't...

00:10:36.000 Don't make the fucking cross-dressing! 0.95

00:10:39.000 Don't make the UFC with the whatever 10 million followers blast a picture in high heels, bitch. 1.00

00:10:44.000 And it went out without even him having to do it.

00:10:46.000 If it's one thing, too, if it's an obvious second thing, and you say the first thing and be real mild, everybody else would pick up the slack.

00:10:53.000 They assume.

00:10:53.000 Did you see Dos Brax?

00:10:55.000 Yeah, at Dos Brax.

00:10:56.000 That guy's hilarious.

00:10:56.000 Did you see the graphic he made of Triple G Canelo?

00:10:59.000 No.

00:10:59.000 And Oscar Delo is in the middle as a cross-dresser.

00:11:03.000 Oh, yeah.

00:11:04.000 He did one of me with a fanny pack on.

00:11:07.000 It was sick.

00:11:08.000 Look at this!

00:11:10.000 Jesus Christ!

00:11:11.000 Jesus Christ, that's funny.

00:11:13.000 Oh my God.

00:11:14.000 Oscar.

00:11:15.000 Oscar, shut the fuck up. 0.93

00:11:16.000 Yeah, please shut the fuck up. 1.00

00:11:18.000 Oscar was smart though because with all the hype of Mayweather and McGregor, he would go on and shit on it, right?

00:11:25.000 Shit on the fight, just to hype up his fight though.

00:11:27.000 Go to that Nate and Nick picture that's everyone's on steroids. 0.61

00:11:30.000 Go scroll up.

00:11:31.000 Scroll up to the top.

00:11:32.000 That one's hilarious.

00:11:36.000 Everybody is on steroids.

00:11:38.000 What a great picture.

00:11:40.000 It's so hilarious.

00:11:41.000 Meanwhile, they might be right.

00:11:43.000 Yeah, they might be right.

00:11:44.000 You know what I started watching last night?

00:11:46.000 I don't know if you'd say it, Icarus or Icarus?

00:11:49.000 On Netflix?

00:11:49.000 Yes.

00:11:50.000 It's all about doping and this guy who's helping the Russian team to do it.

00:11:55.000 There was one estimate that it was somewhere in the high 90s of Russian athletes are on performance-enhancing drugs.

00:12:02.000 That makes sense.

00:12:03.000 That's my thing with this whole Jon Jones stuff.

00:12:07.000 I go back and forth.

00:12:08.000 I'm going to quote our friend Eddie Bravo.

00:12:10.000 When you look into it...

00:12:12.000 When you look into it, that Toronto ball, like so many guys, an article came out today, I think on Fox, Fox Sports, an article came out today of this guy who's a minor league baseball player, and he's pro now, and he's tested twice for it, positive, and a third time, and he's waiting to see if he gets banned for life,

00:12:28.000 because three strikes, you're out in baseball.

00:12:30.000 Banned for life.

00:12:31.000 And they're saying how many guys in baseball test hot for this Toronto ball.

00:12:36.000 And they say in GNC, they have 47 products at GNC that this can show up as.

00:12:42.000 Wow.

00:12:43.000 I know.

00:12:43.000 So I saw that and I'm like, ah, fuck.

00:12:45.000 Yeah, but wait a minute.

00:12:46.000 He's not supposed to be taking anything.

00:12:47.000 You're talking about a guy who's already lost his ability to make a living from Mexican dick pills. 1.00

00:12:52.000 Like, why would he ever just take something off the shelf at GNC? Well, we're not giving the guy kudos because he's the smartest tool in the shed.

00:12:59.000 Sharpest.

00:13:00.000 Sharpest.

00:13:00.000 Sharpest tool in the shed.

00:13:02.000 Smartest tool in the shed.

00:13:03.000 Well, tools are smart, too.

00:13:05.000 Gotta smoke the little weed.

00:13:09.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:13:10.000 I do get it.

00:13:11.000 He might have been like, I need energy.

00:13:14.000 Give me this.

00:13:15.000 What is that?

00:13:15.000 Just some guy on the front with bolts out of his neck and he takes that.

00:13:21.000 Dude, the truth is I would never do steroids.

00:13:23.000 I put that on my children.

00:13:24.000 I put that on my Heavenly Father.

00:13:26.000 He did not bring Heavenly Father on me.

00:13:27.000 I love how he capitalized Heavenly and Father.

00:13:30.000 Because for sure, do that.

00:13:32.000 You don't want to go to hell.

00:13:33.000 Hespec.

00:13:34.000 Hespec.

00:13:35.000 Jones 30. Imagine if he comes back at 34 and still fucks everybody up.

00:13:40.000 But he's 260 pounds at heavyweight.

00:13:43.000 He's in heavyweight.

00:13:43.000 Yeah, fuck all this cutting weight.

00:13:45.000 Just go on a powerlifting rampage for the next four years.

00:13:49.000 Keep your body in shape.

00:13:50.000 He'll still fuck everybody up at heavyweight.

00:13:51.000 But if you look at that Toronto ball, man, and you see how many guys test hot for it, and they're like, what the fuck?

00:13:57.000 It's not in there.

00:13:58.000 I can see Jones' argument a little bit.

00:14:00.000 I know I go back and forth.

00:14:01.000 I'm off the Jones train.

00:14:02.000 But when I see that, and I see how big of an issue it is in baseball, in minor league baseball, USADA and the commission might be like, fuck, look at all these guys, man.

00:14:12.000 We got a real issue here.

00:14:13.000 Maybe he did fuck up.

00:14:14.000 So then I think...

00:14:15.000 There's no way they give him four years.

00:14:17.000 But I haven't heard of anybody else.

00:14:18.000 I haven't heard of anybody else testing positive for this stuff in the UFC. Have you?

00:14:24.000 Is it the same stuff Frank Mir test positive for?

00:14:28.000 This is the other thing.

00:14:29.000 Usually if a guy tests hot for something out of one of those major camps, other guys are going to test hot for the same stuff.

00:14:36.000 Unless he's getting it straight from the power lifter guys.

00:14:39.000 Yeah, or his NFL brothers.

00:14:40.000 Didn't Frank Mir eat kangaroo?

00:14:43.000 It was like tainted kangaroo meat, bro.

00:14:45.000 Was that the worst argument ever?

00:14:47.000 It was the worst ever.

00:14:48.000 Goddammit, Frank!

00:14:49.000 You're a smart guy, too!

00:14:50.000 You're the smartest tool in the shed!

00:14:53.000 Some people eat kangaroo, but it's not common table fare in Australia.

00:14:57.000 Fuck!

00:14:58.000 No, I was just in Australia doing shows.

00:15:00.000 I didn't have a kangaroo burger.

00:15:02.000 No, fuck no.

00:15:03.000 They eat venison, beef, eating kangaroo.

00:15:07.000 Yeah, but did it say what he was flagged for?

00:15:10.000 This is my favorite part.

00:15:11.000 However, he was still given a maximum punishment by USADA because he claimed...

00:15:16.000 He listed numerous potential sources for the positive test, including eating kangaroo meat while in Australia.

00:15:23.000 USADA's like, what?

00:15:24.000 Get the fuck out of here.

00:15:26.000 That's the best you got.

00:15:27.000 We've heard a bunch of shit, but that's all you got.

00:15:30.000 Boy.

00:15:31.000 You know what's interesting?

00:15:32.000 It's like, how much does it help?

00:15:35.000 How much, like...

00:15:37.000 Think about what these guys are doing.

00:15:40.000 I mean, definitely steroids help, right?

00:15:42.000 Steroids make you a better athlete. 1.00

00:15:44.000 They allow you to recover.

00:15:45.000 Some say 10% better.

00:15:47.000 Yeah.

00:15:48.000 It's hard to tell, though, because could John beat Daniel Cormier without that small dosage of Toronto ball?

00:15:55.000 Yes.

00:15:56.000 He could.

00:15:57.000 That's what DC was saying.

00:15:59.000 He was like, the guy doesn't need to do it.

00:16:01.000 He's super talented.

00:16:03.000 He doesn't need to do it.

00:16:04.000 I know.

00:16:04.000 That's why when you look at the evidence, you're like, this small amount of Toronto ball, and you see all the other guys testing positive for it, how much would this really help him?

00:16:13.000 Would he risk all this?

00:16:16.000 To take something piss hot?

00:16:18.000 And it's really not helping that much?

00:16:20.000 And then where do we stop?

00:16:22.000 So right now we want to...

00:16:23.000 And listen, I've been the fucking poster boy of making fun of John on this stuff, but in all seriousness, where do we say, alright, most guys are doing it?

00:16:33.000 Because there's this...

00:16:34.000 I heard Luke Thomas talking about it.

00:16:36.000 They...

00:16:37.000 WADA, right?

00:16:39.000 You saw it in WADA, yeah.

00:16:40.000 Yeah, WADA's the big one.

00:16:41.000 I think in 2007 they did this survey of...

00:16:47.000 Yeah.

00:17:02.000 Yeah.

00:17:03.000 So, like, you know what I'm saying?

00:17:04.000 So we're going to tarnish John's name, and he's not the greatest of all time, but it's like, okay, but then you pay to watch Overeem fight.

00:17:11.000 You pay to watch Vitor Bell for a fight.

00:17:13.000 You know, like, we don't know exactly who's doing what.

00:17:16.000 Right, but if Overeem becomes a champ, I guarantee if he pisses hot as a champ, people turn on him, too.

00:17:21.000 No, I get it, but he's tested for way worse things than John has.

00:17:25.000 But he hasn't.

00:17:25.000 We tested for testosterone, right?

00:17:28.000 Didn't he?

00:17:28.000 It was just testosterone.

00:17:30.000 Oh my god.

00:17:31.000 He had elevated testosterone levels.

00:17:33.000 Him and fucking Bain.

00:17:33.000 I mean, the same shit.

00:17:35.000 When he was Ubering, that's more than testosterone.

00:17:38.000 But he tested positive for that, didn't he?

00:17:40.000 And he said a doctor gave him a shot.

00:17:42.000 Wasn't that like the whole deal?

00:17:44.000 Some doctor gave him a shot for shoulder.

00:17:45.000 Those excuses don't work for...

00:17:46.000 I know, they don't.

00:17:47.000 I know, but let's just think about what they are.

00:17:49.000 So he tested positive for testosterone, I believe.

00:17:52.000 Well, if you test positive for that, and if he had an exemption, that means his levels were on that Vitor Belfort, Nate Markart shit, where they test you like, holy fuck, man!

00:18:02.000 How are you not growing another head?

00:18:04.000 He's one of the first guys popped by USADA, I believe.

00:18:07.000 He was also the one who, remember, he ran away.

00:18:10.000 Oh, that's right.

00:18:11.000 He's like, gotta go!

00:18:12.000 Gotta go!

00:18:13.000 Literally sprinted to his car.

00:18:15.000 Did he?

00:18:15.000 Goddamn, look at that big man run.

00:18:16.000 Yeah.

00:18:17.000 Really?

00:18:17.000 And then he had to come back.

00:18:18.000 He ran to his car?

00:18:19.000 Yeah.

00:18:20.000 They got him after a pre-fight PR thing.

00:18:25.000 And he's like, oh shit!

00:18:27.000 And then ran.

00:18:28.000 Like, you know how he runs in the octagon?

00:18:29.000 He was like, doing that.

00:18:30.000 And so...

00:18:31.000 He got away.

00:18:32.000 And he got in his car and drove off?

00:18:34.000 Yeah.

00:18:34.000 What happens?

00:18:34.000 You get in serious trouble, right?

00:18:36.000 Fuck yeah.

00:18:36.000 Someone convinced him to come back.

00:18:38.000 Probably Dana was like, what the fuck are you doing?

00:18:40.000 Well, you remember what happened with Vanderlei.

00:18:41.000 They banned Vanderlei for life.

00:18:44.000 They said, for life!

00:18:46.000 I don't think that was USADA, though.

00:18:47.000 I feel like that was Nevada.

00:18:48.000 No, that was the Nevada Commission.

00:18:50.000 They're the same ones who wanted to ban Nick for life and fucking told Connor he owes him like $2 million and then he has to shoot a commercial for him.

00:18:58.000 $150,000.

00:18:59.000 And shoot a commercial.

00:19:00.000 What?

00:19:01.000 Fuck you.

00:19:02.000 I'm not fighting here anymore.

00:19:03.000 Yeah.

00:19:04.000 Do you know that?

00:19:04.000 Yeah, what was the commercial?

00:19:05.000 An anti-bullying commercial.

00:19:07.000 Oh, they're hilarious.

00:19:07.000 Listen, you pay us $150,000, shoot this commercial for free.

00:19:11.000 Why would I do an anti-bullying commercial when you're bullying me?

00:19:15.000 You're bullying me into doing an anti-bullying commercial?

00:19:18.000 Or Connor should just be like, all right, well, cool, I'll do the commercial, but I'm going to give you my rate.

00:19:21.000 It's about $2 million to do a commercial right now.

00:19:24.000 I need about $1.7 million.

00:19:27.000 That's what I need.

00:19:28.000 You guys owe me that.

00:19:29.000 So I'll pay the fine, but you owe me $1.7 million to do the commercial.

00:19:32.000 There's a lady in the Nevada State Athletic Commission that's very mean. 1.00

00:19:36.000 You know that one lady? 1.00

00:19:37.000 I think that's your job.

00:19:39.000 I'd be mean, too.

00:19:40.000 I forget who was...

00:19:42.000 Was it John Jones?

00:19:43.000 Was it Nick Diaz?

00:19:44.000 It might have been Nick Diaz.

00:19:45.000 But just the scolding that she was giving one of the fighters while this was all going down, when they were going over some sort of a positive test.

00:19:52.000 It's like...

00:19:53.000 Because they're government officials, so they feel like they have this power, and it becomes like a tyranny.

00:19:59.000 They're not nice.

00:20:00.000 You don't have a personal relationship with this guy.

00:20:02.000 You shouldn't have personal issues.

00:20:04.000 This stern-faced anger in your voice, you're in some sort of a competition.

00:20:09.000 To convict someone and to punish them.

00:20:12.000 It's an ego thing.

00:20:13.000 Absolutely is.

00:20:14.000 It's not like, look, there can absolutely be, like, say what you want about the Golden Snitch, right, Nowitzki? 0.66

00:20:20.000 I like it.

00:20:21.000 So when I call Golden Snitch, that's a positive term. 1.00

00:20:24.000 I know.

00:20:24.000 It's a fun thing to say.

00:20:25.000 Yeah, it's great.

00:20:26.000 Someone gave me a Golden Snitch toy last night.

00:20:28.000 You know from Harry Potter?

00:20:30.000 No.

00:20:31.000 Oh, there's a golden snitch in Harry Potter.

00:20:32.000 Carry on, though.

00:20:34.000 Nowitzki is never angry about it, never emotional about it, very factual.

00:20:40.000 Like, when he describes what a thing was, he's not casting judgment.

00:20:44.000 He's not being mean.

00:20:45.000 He's just saying, this is what we have.

00:20:48.000 He's doing his job.

00:20:49.000 He's not sitting back going, God, I want to catch John with this Toronto ball shit.

00:20:53.000 God, I hope that happens.

00:20:54.000 He's not doing any of that.

00:20:55.000 Also, you've got to realize, when they brought on Nowitzki, is they were trying to paint the picture to sell it for the most money possible to be taken serious.

00:21:02.000 So you sign this huge Reebok endorsement deal.

00:21:05.000 You start doing...

00:21:07.000 It's a pump and dump.

00:21:07.000 Is that what you're saying?

00:21:08.000 It's a goddamn pump and dump.

00:21:09.000 And then Frank and Lorenzo just sold the remaining shares, too.

00:21:14.000 Like, we're really out...

00:21:15.000 Yeah, someone was just telling me about how they do that with businesses.

00:21:20.000 Like, some businesses are not operating just to try to make a profit.

00:21:23.000 They're operating to sell.

00:21:25.000 Yes.

00:21:26.000 And I went, what?

00:21:27.000 And then this one guy was telling me that his friend had a business that was operating that way, but then it didn't sell.

00:21:34.000 The sell fell apart, so then they have to change the business plan.

00:21:38.000 And then start making it a business to make money.

00:21:41.000 Like, what the fuck are you talking about?

00:21:43.000 Yeah, with the Fertittas, I mean, you're talking straight Mavericks when it comes to business.

00:21:46.000 So with all they have going on, they don't need the UFC to do well.

00:21:49.000 It doesn't help their lives.

00:21:51.000 Doesn't mean anything to them right now.

00:21:52.000 So they look at it as a business.

00:21:54.000 So let's take these steps.

00:21:55.000 Well, the strict testing could fuck guys down the road.

00:21:57.000 Don't care.

00:21:58.000 Reebok this.

00:21:59.000 Don't care.

00:22:00.000 That's not our deal.

00:22:01.000 This is what's going to make it look best for buyers.

00:22:04.000 That's what we're doing.

00:22:06.000 $4 billion.

00:22:07.000 Go fuck yourselves.

00:22:08.000 Have fun, fellas.

00:22:09.000 Genius strategy, really, when you think about it that way.

00:22:11.000 They'll probably teach it at Harvard.

00:22:12.000 What Dana and the Fertittas did, they'll probably teach it at Harvard.

00:22:15.000 Yeah, really think about it that way.

00:22:17.000 In terms of just a giant sum of money to be earned.

00:22:21.000 You know what?

00:22:22.000 They earned it, too, because you think about where the business was before they came along and how they were 40-plus million dollars in debt when they filmed The Ultimate Fighter.

00:22:31.000 They were losing so much fucking money.

00:22:33.000 Just hand over fist losing money.

00:22:35.000 At one point, Lorenzo had called Dana and said, let's sell it.

00:22:40.000 Try to find some buyers in the morning.

00:22:41.000 Then he woke up in the morning and changed his mind.

00:22:43.000 He's like, fuck that.

00:22:44.000 We're going to keep it.

00:22:46.000 I mean, that's how much money they were losing.

00:22:49.000 Not a lot of people would have done that.

00:22:51.000 Depends how much money I have in the bank.

00:22:53.000 Yeah, but even with a lot of money in the bank, you can't just keep chewing through money.

00:22:57.000 If you're $40 million in, that means in a couple years you're $100 million in.

00:23:02.000 You're going to get that $100 million back?

00:23:04.000 Not very likely.

00:23:05.000 How about their cousin bought the Houston Rockets for $2.2 billion?

00:23:10.000 That family is fucking...

00:23:12.000 Ballin'. 0.86

00:23:13.000 Hashtag ballin'.

00:23:14.000 Hashtag ballin'.

00:23:15.000 Johnny Depp needs a...

00:23:17.000 Yeah, Johnny Depp does need a loan.

00:23:19.000 Someone needs to tell Johnny he doesn't need 14 houses.

00:23:22.000 Johnny, settle down.

00:23:24.000 And a knife.

00:23:25.000 I mean, what kind of speed are you on when you sign the mortgage for that 14th house?

00:23:30.000 You're like, fuck it!

00:23:32.000 We're going in!

00:23:34.000 Just killing it.

00:23:35.000 But that 14th house, like, holy shit.

00:23:37.000 What do you do with those?

00:23:38.000 You don't do anything with them.

00:23:39.000 That's the problem.

00:23:40.000 It's an ego thing?

00:23:41.000 Look at that.

00:23:41.000 Johnny Depp's Kentucky horse farm fails to sell at auction.

00:23:45.000 How much did that bitch go for? 1.00

00:23:46.000 2.9.

00:23:48.000 Does it just happen, no matter what?

00:23:50.000 Like, look up, scroll up and look at that picture of him.

00:23:52.000 Does it just happen, no matter what, that after a while you almost become like a caricature?

00:23:58.000 You become one of Tim Burton's characters?

00:24:01.000 Yeah, I mean, you paint yourself as the odd fellow who's, you know, on the outside for the longest time, and then all of a sudden you become this blockbuster guy.

00:24:12.000 Because Johnny Depp for the longest time used to talk about, because he's a very respected actor.

00:24:16.000 Hell yeah.

00:24:16.000 And he used to talk about how he doesn't want to be Mr. Blockbuster guy.

00:24:20.000 And then he gets on Pirates of the Caribbean.

00:24:22.000 He probably just thinks it's a cool part.

00:24:24.000 But it's still Disney.

00:24:26.000 You know Disney don't fuck around. 0.99

00:24:27.000 Yeah, but it seems like a cool part.

00:24:28.000 I mean, so was Alice in Wonderland.

00:24:29.000 That didn't fuck his life up.

00:24:31.000 Alice in Wonderland was just great.

00:24:32.000 Good movie.

00:24:33.000 He was a great movie and he was awesome in it.

00:24:35.000 Amazing.

00:24:35.000 As the Mad Hatter.

00:24:36.000 I was the Mad Hatter for Halloween.

00:24:38.000 I dressed up like him.

00:24:39.000 That's a dope costume. 1.00

00:24:40.000 I saw that.

00:24:40.000 That was sick.

00:24:41.000 But he's, you know, he's a legit brilliant actor.

00:24:45.000 And then all of a sudden he's in this blockbuster that's a Disney thing.

00:24:49.000 So all of a sudden he becomes this like huge international, just top of the food chain superstar.

00:24:56.000 Bro, he got a Jack Sparrow tattoo.

00:24:59.000 Ew.

00:24:59.000 He has the Sparrow on his forearm.

00:25:02.000 How would you feel like if I had a Fear Factor tattoo on my leg?

00:25:05.000 A big MTV sign on your neck?

00:25:07.000 How about it right here?

00:25:07.000 I wasn't on MTV. Oh, that's right.

00:25:09.000 But if it was on my thigh and it just said, Fear is not a factor for me?

00:25:14.000 On your ribs, fear is not a factor?

00:25:16.000 And you pull up in that slingshot?

00:25:18.000 Just a real dick move?

00:25:21.000 I would have to gold plate it.

00:25:22.000 I feel like that slingshot's missing some bling.

00:25:25.000 I need it to be shinier.

00:25:28.000 Yeah, sometimes, I don't know, man.

00:25:30.000 With Johnny Depp, he just got too into it.

00:25:32.000 Well, I just think, you know, when you're on something that you don't enjoy, it's one thing that does happen.

00:25:38.000 It happens to a lot of people on bad sitcoms that are making a ton of money.

00:25:41.000 They just start going crazy and buying all these things because they need these things to make them feel good because their work doesn't.

00:25:48.000 And the material.

00:25:49.000 Yeah, at least I'm working, but I'm going to get that new Ferrari.

00:25:52.000 That Ferrari 4, whatever the fuck it is.

00:25:55.000 459. 459. Is that the newest one?

00:25:58.000 Whatever it is.

00:25:58.000 Keep going.

00:25:59.000 The top of the food chain, dope-ass Ferrari.

00:26:01.000 I mean, maybe you just like Ferraris, but then, you know, maybe you just buy a yacht, maybe you buy a this, and maybe you buy a that, and then you sign a deal to do the show that you don't even want to do anymore, but you have to sign that deal now, because you've got a $12 million mansion in Malibu!

00:26:15.000 Overlooking the ocean, motherfucker!

00:26:18.000 Malibu!

00:26:23.000 I think...

00:26:24.000 Doesn't Johnny Depp have anyone in his life go...

00:26:26.000 No.

00:26:26.000 After Four House, he goes, God, you know, I might chill out on the fifth one, man.

00:26:30.000 No.

00:26:31.000 You're not really even staying in the other ones.

00:26:33.000 This is just a theory.

00:26:33.000 At 10?

00:26:34.000 No one's like, 10, bro?

00:26:35.000 I think we should take a break.

00:26:37.000 At 14?

00:26:38.000 Yeah.

00:26:39.000 This is just a theory.

00:26:40.000 But I think that one of the things about a guy like Johnny Depp is if you want...

00:26:45.000 And I don't know this Amber Heard lady.

00:26:48.000 Who he was living with.

00:26:49.000 She seems nice enough to me.

00:26:50.000 Very beautiful.

00:26:51.000 Matter of fact, I read somewhere that she was, like, some computer program said that she was the most beautiful person alive.

00:26:59.000 That didn't even make sense to me, right?

00:27:01.000 Like, symmetrically, I guess, her eyes or something?

00:27:04.000 I don't know.

00:27:04.000 Yeah.

00:27:04.000 Well, my computer's different.

00:27:06.000 My thought is, well, she's beautiful.

00:27:08.000 Yeah, she's cool.

00:27:08.000 But my thought is, when you're a dude like him, and you got a girl like that, and you're having a great time, one of the great things to do is probably just buy a ton of shit.

00:27:23.000 And just impress this girl.

00:27:24.000 And just take her on this journey.

00:27:26.000 What kind of ho wants 14 houses? 1.00

00:27:30.000 He's going crazy!

00:27:32.000 Well, he didn't buy 14 houses with her.

00:27:35.000 I'm sure he only bought a few.

00:27:37.000 Okay, eight.

00:27:38.000 But he's going crazy.

00:27:39.000 He's buying all kinds of shit.

00:27:40.000 And you think she loves that?

00:27:41.000 This is what I think.

00:27:42.000 I think things just escalate.

00:27:45.000 I think things just escalate.

00:27:46.000 Spiral out of control.

00:27:47.000 Yeah.

00:27:48.000 You get away from yourself.

00:27:49.000 Next thing you know, you're standing on the fucking red carpet with eyeliner on, and silver chains, and your shirt is opening your chest, and you're acting like you're in some crazy indie rock band, and you're 53. You become a caricature.

00:28:02.000 You're Jack Sparrow.

00:28:02.000 You start dressing like what you think people want to see instead of you.

00:28:09.000 And you kind of forget who you are, maybe.

00:28:11.000 I mean, I'm not just saying just him.

00:28:12.000 I'm not picking on him.

00:28:13.000 Did you see Jim Carrey's latest interview?

00:28:15.000 Yes, I did.

00:28:16.000 I was going to bring that up.

00:28:17.000 He's playing it.

00:28:17.000 Oh, were you?

00:28:18.000 But he's getting ready for a character who acts like that.

00:28:21.000 He's in character.

00:28:23.000 That's not Jim Carrey.

00:28:25.000 He's also my favorite human being, one of them.

00:28:27.000 But he's playing a character in that.

00:28:30.000 So he has a new role.

00:28:32.000 I forget who he's playing, but the guys...

00:28:33.000 They announced yesterday he signed for a new show on Showtime where he's playing a comedian that's freaking out later in life or something like that.

00:28:41.000 And that's what he's doing.

00:28:41.000 He was a part of the whole I'm dying up here thing.

00:28:44.000 He's a producer.

00:28:45.000 Yeah.

00:28:47.000 So he's playing a character of a comedian who's freaking out.

00:28:50.000 Who freaks out like that.

00:28:52.000 Like that's typical to that role.

00:28:53.000 So that's kind of what he's doing there.

00:28:55.000 He was supposed to play, or at least there's a rumor, that he was supposed to play Terrence McKenna.

00:29:01.000 In some sort of biography, the famed psychedelic adventurer Terrence McKenna.

00:29:06.000 He'd be great on that.

00:29:07.000 Oh, he'd be amazing on it.

00:29:08.000 Did you see him as Andy Dufresne?

00:29:09.000 I'm sorry, Andy Kaufman?

00:29:10.000 I was going to say, this video went around of him painting, too.

00:29:13.000 Yeah, he's got some really cool painting that he's been doing recently.

00:29:17.000 It's a real cool little piece.

00:29:19.000 That doesn't look recent.

00:29:20.000 It looks a lot younger there.

00:29:21.000 I think this has been probably a two or three year time period that this got made over.

00:29:26.000 It's a six-minute video.

00:29:27.000 Did you ever see his daughter?

00:29:29.000 That's cool stuff, man.

00:29:29.000 Yeah, he's a sick painter.

00:29:31.000 That thing with the neon and black.

00:29:32.000 Go back to that for a second, Jamie.

00:29:34.000 The thing with the neon and black that he was just...

00:29:36.000 That is amazing.

00:29:37.000 Super talented.

00:29:38.000 That's really cool looking.

00:29:40.000 Did you see his daughter when she was on American Idol?

00:29:42.000 And the poor girl's getting ready to sing, you know, the biggest night of her life. 1.00

00:29:46.000 Like, let's go and wire it in to her famous father, Jim Carrey.

00:29:50.000 Jim's all, uh, hey.

00:29:52.000 He's like on Skype.

00:29:53.000 He's like, hey, baby, good luck.

00:29:55.000 They're like, take it away, little Carrey.

00:29:57.000 I'm like, oh, God.

00:29:59.000 What a shitty moment, man, for her.

00:30:02.000 Like, let her have her moment, man.

00:30:03.000 Don't bring your dad's Jim Carrey, for God's sakes.

00:30:06.000 Well, that's just television, man.

00:30:07.000 That's how they do it.

00:30:07.000 They go 100% cheese or don't go at all.

00:30:10.000 Yeah.

00:30:12.000 They want to appeal to Joe Slackjaw sitting on his easy chair at home, just like this.

00:30:17.000 But I feel like even Joe Slackjaw doesn't like that bullshit.

00:30:21.000 There's enough people that do, and enough people that'll tolerate it.

00:30:24.000 See?

00:30:25.000 Ratings make to differ.

00:30:26.000 Well, they don't really.

00:30:28.000 They do, though.

00:30:28.000 They still have good ratings.

00:30:30.000 It's just a tired show.

00:30:31.000 Well, it depends what it is.

00:30:32.000 If you think about most shows, ratings are down in general, but look at things that are more organic and real, like your show, like other podcasts, like other shows on YouTube, stuff like that, where it's not so bullshit, producer telling you how to feel,

00:30:48.000 what opinions you should have.

00:30:49.000 But they're stuck in that model because they have commercials.

00:30:52.000 They're stuck in that model because those commercials that they have to interrupt their show with, everything has to kind of wrap up every few minutes.

00:31:01.000 I get it.

00:31:01.000 How many minutes do they go without commercials on a regular television show?

00:31:05.000 Well, Bubble Guppies lets you play the full thing, but...

00:31:11.000 I used to like bubblegubbies.

00:31:13.000 My kids love it.

00:31:13.000 Oh, my kid's obsessed.

00:31:15.000 They loved it when they were really little.

00:31:17.000 Let's find that out.

00:31:18.000 On a 22-minute show?

00:31:20.000 Yeah.

00:31:20.000 It's like seven minutes or so.

00:31:21.000 Every seven minutes?

00:31:22.000 Roughly.

00:31:23.000 So every seven minutes for a sitcom, do you think they do the same for an hour show?

00:31:26.000 The breaks are different depending on the show, but it's like 12 minutes, 20 minutes.

00:31:30.000 You can never get real deep.

00:31:33.000 What if they front-loaded it like podcasting does?

00:31:36.000 No one's going to watch that part.

00:31:37.000 No one's watching me anyways.

00:31:39.000 Sometimes they do that, like, this show is brought to you commercial-free by, and then you don't get it, but they still announce that every fucking day.

00:31:45.000 That's probably the way to do it.

00:31:46.000 That's probably the way to do it, or product placement is the way to do it. 0.98

00:31:49.000 Just don't be gross.

00:31:50.000 Ooh, product placement's tough.

00:31:51.000 Yeah, you just can't be gross about it.

00:31:53.000 I mean, if someone is drinking a Coke, show a Coke.

00:31:56.000 There's nothing wrong with that, as long as, you know, it makes sense for the scene.

00:32:00.000 You know what I mean?

00:32:01.000 Like, the idea that you're going to put stuff in there that doesn't belong for product placement, well, that's gross.

00:32:07.000 But if you could figure out some way where it's organic, I just think the model is terrible.

00:32:12.000 I agree.

00:32:13.000 There you go.

00:32:13.000 It's so hilarious.

00:32:14.000 Like that.

00:32:16.000 Yeah.

00:32:16.000 He's all, what the fuck?

00:32:18.000 Powerful Rob Lowe.

00:32:20.000 Handsome.

00:32:21.000 Dimey.

00:32:22.000 Very handsome.

00:32:23.000 But I think they're going to start gravitating towards more of that realness.

00:32:27.000 They have to.

00:32:28.000 People smell bullshit now.

00:32:30.000 Yeah, but Joe Slackjaw sitting in his armchair...

00:32:33.000 In rural Illinois.

00:32:34.000 Sorry to pick on you, Illinois.

00:32:35.000 It's just I picked a state.

00:32:36.000 I could say Massachusetts.

00:32:38.000 Whatever.

00:32:38.000 Montana.

00:32:39.000 But he's just sitting there, and he's got his mouth open.

00:32:41.000 And maybe that appeals to him, and maybe you'll tolerate it.

00:32:45.000 And then there's that whole spectrum in between.

00:32:48.000 True.

00:32:49.000 Of people that, like, this is my favorite show.

00:32:51.000 I love it when people can't sing.

00:32:53.000 I fucking love it.

00:32:54.000 I love it when they get up there, and they try to sing, and their voice cracks, and you know they're embarrassed.

00:32:59.000 Oh, that makes me feel so good.

00:33:03.000 People do...

00:33:04.000 I used to love it.

00:33:05.000 When I'd watch American Idol, my favorite part was the people that sucked.

00:33:09.000 Me too.

00:33:09.000 That's my favorite.

00:33:10.000 When they get all serious, that's like, oh, relax, man.

00:33:12.000 Hey, hey, hey, I gotta go.

00:33:13.000 All right, you're good.

00:33:14.000 I'm out.

00:33:15.000 Whatever happened to that lady who was like... 1.00

00:33:17.000 She looked like she was in her 50s. 0.99

00:33:18.000 Oh, and her teeth were all fucked up? 1.00

00:33:19.000 Susan Boyle.

00:33:20.000 That's America's Got Talent.

00:33:22.000 Which one was that?

00:33:23.000 X Factor in England.

00:33:24.000 X Factor.

00:33:24.000 Was it X Factor?

00:33:24.000 Yep.

00:33:25.000 What happened to her?

00:33:25.000 Is that Simon Cowell guys on everything?

00:33:27.000 He's ridiculous.

00:33:28.000 I heard she got like...

00:33:29.000 Hashtag ballin'.

00:33:30.000 Crazy ballin'.

00:33:31.000 Loves black girls.

00:33:32.000 I heard...

00:33:33.000 Not that that matters.

00:33:34.000 Who doesn't?

00:33:34.000 Right.

00:33:35.000 I heard Susan Boyle got paid bank and was like, fuck this fame thing. 1.00

00:33:40.000 Whoa.

00:33:40.000 Found her.

00:33:41.000 Really?

00:33:41.000 And someone's like, use some of the money on her teeth.

00:33:43.000 Britain's Got Talent.

00:33:45.000 Britain's Got Talent.

00:33:47.000 Remember how great she was?

00:33:48.000 Dude!

00:33:49.000 Remember when they just didn't expect it and she came out and just smashed it?

00:33:53.000 Smashed it.

00:33:54.000 Don't let her bite you though.

00:33:54.000 I remember I watched that clip and I was like, whoa!

00:33:56.000 I know.

00:33:56.000 That is crazy that she can sing that good.

00:33:58.000 She is right now.

00:33:59.000 It's her today.

00:34:00.000 Whoa.

00:34:01.000 She's turned 50. What?

00:34:03.000 Hold on.

00:34:04.000 She just turned 50?

00:34:05.000 She's my age?

00:34:06.000 Yeah.

00:34:06.000 How's that possible?

00:34:08.000 Well, that's crazy.

00:34:10.000 That scares the fucking shit out of me.

00:34:12.000 You're aging like cheese, she's aging like fruit. 1.00

00:34:15.000 Wow, she's gotta use it or lose it, baby. 0.63

00:34:19.000 She's using her voice, man.

00:34:20.000 Yeah, but your body carries the voice around.

00:34:23.000 I'm sure she's still probably singing here and there.

00:34:25.000 She doesn't, like, tour.

00:34:26.000 I know she kind of bounced out of the spotlight, though.

00:34:29.000 Well, she lives simple.

00:34:30.000 Or she made money. 1.00

00:34:32.000 She probably made a ton of money. 1.00

00:34:32.000 Weight loss photos. 1.00

00:34:35.000 Oh, she's 56, son.

00:34:37.000 So that was when that was...

00:34:39.000 Can't even count.

00:34:40.000 When she won, she was 50. We'll see what Brogan looks like in six years, talking about that shit.

00:34:45.000 I'll probably look like her.

00:34:51.000 Yeah, all those talent shows are fucking weird, man.

00:34:54.000 You know, America's Got Talent, and...

00:34:57.000 What's the one with...

00:34:58.000 Is it Jennifer Lopez is on one of them now? 0.96

00:35:02.000 Oh, she has a dance show, right?

00:35:04.000 And then that country music guy is on with that other girl.

00:35:06.000 I'm about to bring back American Idol right now with Katy Perry hosting.

00:35:09.000 They're paying like 25 million bucks to be on that.

00:35:11.000 Oh, Jesus!

00:35:13.000 Some crazy amount of money to host it.

00:35:14.000 He's like, hell no.

00:35:15.000 He would be on to...

00:35:16.000 Donald Trump hates black people!

00:35:19.000 How about Donald Trump going hard at ESPN? Yeah, but he's wrong.

00:35:23.000 He's so wrong.

00:35:23.000 He's like, people are leaving?

00:35:24.000 No, their ratings are up.

00:35:26.000 Like, that's so crazy.

00:35:27.000 Ratings aren't up.

00:35:28.000 Are they down?

00:35:29.000 Yeah, they're down.

00:35:29.000 Not because of that, though.

00:35:30.000 Not because of him.

00:35:31.000 Oh, somebody said that their ratings are up, though.

00:35:34.000 They're like, recent ratings.

00:35:37.000 Maybe.

00:35:37.000 I just read things and I just go with them.

00:35:40.000 NFL's back.

00:35:41.000 I mean, they're just up because the summer's over.

00:35:42.000 But in general, they're down.

00:35:45.000 They had all those cuts.

00:35:47.000 They had to cut a bunch of people, budget cuts.

00:35:48.000 They cut so much talent.

00:35:49.000 But that...

00:35:50.000 What's her name?

00:35:51.000 Jamel Hill.

00:35:51.000 Jamel Hill came out and was like on her...

00:35:54.000 Granted, she is an employee of VSPN, but on her personal social media on Twitter, she was saying he's a racist, stuff like this.

00:36:01.000 She said he's a white supremacist, and she said he's the worst president of her lifetime, and a lot of people said that.

00:36:06.000 It's just the fact that she's a public media figure, so everybody wanted her fired. 1.00

00:36:10.000 This is like this weird outrage culture we live in.

00:36:14.000 She's entitled to her fucking opinion. 0.99

00:36:15.000 Now, the thing is, does ESPN want people on their network being all political and talking about shit like that on their social media?

00:36:24.000 And do they have rules about that?

00:36:25.000 Because some companies do have rules about that.

00:36:27.000 Whether you agree with those rules or not, some companies do have rules on what you can and can't say on social media.

00:36:31.000 But here's the thing that I found fascinating.

00:36:34.000 Donald Trump didn't talk about her.

00:36:37.000 Talked about ESPN. I thought that was a chicken shit thing to do.

00:36:41.000 Like there was a woman who works for ESPN. African American. 0.99

00:36:45.000 Oh, yes, that's true.

00:36:46.000 That's what I'm saying.

00:36:47.000 There's a woman that works for ESPN, a very specific person, not ESPN, you know, telling lies, should apologize or whatever the fuck he wrote.

00:36:57.000 He didn't call her out.

00:36:58.000 He didn't call her out.

00:36:59.000 I think he's...

00:37:00.000 He knows.

00:37:01.000 He can't do it.

00:37:02.000 Especially not now when everybody thinks you're a white supremacist.

00:37:04.000 You're going to pick on the black lady? 1.00

00:37:06.000 He'd pick on Rosie O'Donnell all day long, right?

00:37:08.000 He'll go after everybody else, call him a loser.

00:37:13.000 The girl in Miss America in her little speech slammed him too.

00:37:16.000 She said a whole bunch of shit about him and apparently no one's really gay.

00:37:19.000 Who's the host?

00:37:19.000 Is that Kirk Cameron?

00:37:20.000 No, I don't know.

00:37:21.000 Looks like Kirk Cameron.

00:37:22.000 That's homeboy from Survivor.

00:37:24.000 What?

00:37:24.000 Who is it from Survivor?

00:37:26.000 Oh, I'm sorry, not from Survivor, from Bachelor Bachelorette.

00:37:28.000 Yeah, I don't know.

00:37:29.000 You ever seen him get roasted when he's accused of cheating on his girl?

00:37:32.000 Classic.

00:37:32.000 Anyways, yeah, that Miss America throws it down.

00:37:35.000 Yeah, she said a bunch of shit about Trump and no one's going after her necessarily.

00:37:38.000 She's quote-unquote gaining millions of fans right now. 0.88

00:37:41.000 Right, but what's interesting is I watched someone posted something about Anthony Bourdain.

00:37:47.000 Anthony Bourdain was caught by TMZ at the airport, okay?

00:37:50.000 Very quick, sort of silly interview.

00:37:53.000 They asked him a question, if you had to cook for Kim Jong-un and Donald Trump, what would you serve?

00:37:59.000 And he goes, hemlock.

00:38:01.000 And he walks away.

00:38:02.000 It's a joke!

00:38:03.000 It's a fucking one-liner!

00:38:04.000 He's also funny.

00:38:05.000 He's a funny guy.

00:38:07.000 He says a one-liner, and all these people are saying, should he be fired from CNN for saying that he would poison Trump if he had, you know, good luck, the Secret Service is going to contact you.

00:38:17.000 And so I look at his fucking Twitter page, man, and it's crazy.

00:38:22.000 All these fucking psychos are telling the Secret Service they should investigate at CNN. Are you going to fire him like you fired Reza Aslan?

00:38:30.000 What's wrong with people, man?

00:38:32.000 Outrage culture.

00:38:35.000 People are getting excited about things being outrageous.

00:38:37.000 Instead of just going, this weed has got me coughing.

00:38:41.000 Instead of just looking at it and going, well, I don't agree with that.

00:38:44.000 Fuck that guy.

00:38:45.000 Or going, well, that was obviously a joke, which is like the normal person would do.

00:38:49.000 It affects you like not at all.

00:38:51.000 Do you really think that Anthony Bourdain wants to fucking poison Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un?

00:38:55.000 And they should lose their jobs?

00:38:57.000 Exactly.

00:38:58.000 She's amazing, by the way.

00:38:59.000 Outrage culture.

00:39:01.000 Outrage culture.

00:39:02.000 People just decide they can try to affect something, and then things start getting ramped up.

00:39:06.000 The momentum kicks in, all these other people jump on board, and they get excited about being a part of a group that wants to get Anthony Bourdain kicked off the air.

00:39:12.000 Because they want some sort of weird direction.

00:39:16.000 They think they're important enough where they can get these people fired, and they think if they get together enough, they're going to have the power to affect that person's life.

00:39:22.000 And they can even believe they're right.

00:39:24.000 Bunch of bitches, right? 1.00

00:39:26.000 And I kept saying, you know, threatening the life of POTUS. I kept saying POTUS, like, you guys, what are you talking about, the king?

00:39:33.000 You guys are out of your mind.

00:39:34.000 This is a person with a terrible job.

00:39:36.000 This ain't Game of Thrones.

00:39:37.000 Donald Trump is a person with a job that no one wants, okay?

00:39:39.000 That's what he is.

00:39:40.000 He doesn't want it.

00:39:40.000 Is he doing a good job at it?

00:39:41.000 No.

00:39:42.000 But is anybody doing a good job at it?

00:39:44.000 No.

00:39:44.000 I think Obama was like the best president we ever had.

00:39:47.000 And you look at...

00:39:48.000 And I know people are going to get mad at me for this.

00:39:50.000 A lot of things that I think that he did that I don't agree with.

00:39:53.000 Like the way he went after the press.

00:39:56.000 The way he promised to protect whistleblowers, but he never did.

00:39:59.000 Like free speech and people having to give up their sources was...

00:40:03.000 Damaged heavily during Obama's administration.

00:40:05.000 The use of drones, unprecedented use of drones, unprecedented amount of civilian deaths during his administration.

00:40:12.000 The question is, how much of that was his fault?

00:40:14.000 How much can one man even control?

00:40:16.000 I mean, I think it's an impossible fucking job.

00:40:19.000 But the way he carries himself, like a person, I love more than anybody.

00:40:23.000 His character.

00:40:24.000 His character, the way he can enunciate clearly.

00:40:27.000 To me, he was like a good representative of what I would like to see as a calm, peaceful, educated American who's smart and is just affable.

00:40:41.000 He seems friendly and nice.

00:40:43.000 He seems like one of us.

00:40:44.000 He's the first president that kind of seemed like one of us where you could chill with him and I could actually relate to him.

00:40:49.000 Yes, the only one.

00:40:50.000 White House and a dick suck. 1.00

00:40:52.000 I think if I was alone with Clinton, I probably wouldn't be able to jive with him.

00:40:56.000 I just don't think, especially if you're alone and there's a chick in the room, I think he'd look right past you.

00:41:00.000 Yeah, you'd be like a distraction.

00:41:02.000 You'd be the cock block with him in the room. 0.57

00:41:04.000 Obama's not like that.

00:41:05.000 He's a straight up rooster.

00:41:07.000 I think Clinton's a straight up rooster.

00:41:08.000 Yeah, I feel you.

00:41:10.000 He's in that room.

00:41:10.000 He's like...

00:41:12.000 Yeah.

00:41:12.000 He just can't help himself.

00:41:14.000 Yeah, cocky.

00:41:15.000 He's just got that...

00:41:16.000 He's just slinging dick.

00:41:17.000 That's what he's here for.

00:41:18.000 That's what I'm here for.

00:41:19.000 I'm here to sling dick. 0.57

00:41:21.000 I ain't got time to talk to some fucking old comedian. 0.90

00:41:24.000 I'm here to sling dick. 0.57

00:41:25.000 Oh, you were a fan of me.

00:41:27.000 You voted for me.

00:41:28.000 Great.

00:41:28.000 Get the fuck out.

00:41:29.000 That was a long time ago, fuckface.

00:41:32.000 I'm over here trying to get my dick wet.

00:41:36.000 Listen, love to talk to you, but I ain't got that much time.

00:41:38.000 Have you looked at me lately, motherfucker?

00:41:40.000 I'm dying.

00:41:41.000 Okay, I'm here for pussy. 0.99

00:41:44.000 And you're fucking this up, man.

00:41:46.000 Fucking hilarious.

00:41:48.000 That's exactly what I think.

00:41:49.000 I'm here for pussy. 0.99

00:41:51.000 Have you ever been on Air Force One?

00:41:52.000 You know, I still get to use it.

00:41:54.000 Does he?

00:41:54.000 I wonder if they still get to use it.

00:41:56.000 They get Secret Service for the rest of their lives, right?

00:41:58.000 Yeah, but how do they fly around?

00:41:59.000 Do they fly around commercial?

00:42:00.000 It seems odd.

00:42:01.000 Although, President Carter was on a train high-fiving everyone.

00:42:05.000 Yeah, but President Carter was a beautiful person.

00:42:07.000 That's why he only lasted one term.

00:42:09.000 You know, they've negotiated with the hostages like in Iran to make sure that the hostages weren't released until after Ronald Reagan was elected president.

00:42:18.000 That is some dirty, dirty shit.

00:42:21.000 That means you kept Americans imprisoned extra so that you would look good and they would be released when this fucking actor with slick black hair Gotta crack a few eggs and make an omelet, my man.

00:42:36.000 Jesus Christ.

00:42:36.000 It's so dirty.

00:42:37.000 None of that stuff surprises me when it comes to politics or sports.

00:42:40.000 None of it surprises me.

00:42:41.000 It's all business.

00:42:42.000 Reagan was also the first guy who used the religious groups of our country to get elected.

00:42:49.000 He got them on board with him.

00:42:51.000 Do what you gotta do.

00:42:51.000 Well, he brought in religion to politics in a lot of ways or made it popular and obvious that that was a good choice to align yourself.

00:43:01.000 No president today could be an atheist.

00:43:04.000 I don't think they would elect him.

00:43:05.000 I disagree.

00:43:06.000 Really?

00:43:07.000 What are they living for?

00:43:08.000 They're out there in the White House?

00:43:09.000 What if they launch a nuclear bomb?

00:43:11.000 They think that the end doesn't mean anything, okay?

00:43:13.000 I'm here for God's heavenly glory.

00:43:15.000 My heavenly father, I'm looking over my heavenly father right now.

00:43:19.000 What's the percentage of atheists in the United States now?

00:43:22.000 It's higher than ever.

00:43:24.000 Yeah, but it's still low.

00:43:25.000 I don't think so, man.

00:43:26.000 It's higher than ever.

00:43:27.000 It's less than half.

00:43:27.000 No way!

00:43:29.000 Well, half, fuck's sakes.

00:43:31.000 But I think it's less than half.

00:43:32.000 Probably 30%.

00:43:32.000 Yeah, but you need those if you want to run for president.

00:43:35.000 Because people are more concerned about the Lord than they are about anything else.

00:43:40.000 Okay, 22% of the U.S. population is religiously unaffiliated.

00:43:44.000 Atheists make up 3.1%.

00:43:46.000 Agnostists make up 4% of the U.S. population.

00:43:49.000 So 22%.

00:43:50.000 So it says that 22%, but it says they're religiously unaffiliated.

00:43:57.000 Those are votes for the atheist president.

00:43:59.000 But I don't know if that means religiously unaffiliated.

00:44:02.000 Like, they could believe in God, but they just don't belong to a certain church.

00:44:06.000 Nah, we getting those votes.

00:44:07.000 Okay, 214 general.

00:44:09.000 Yeah, those votes, I think, would go towards a religious person if that person...

00:44:14.000 Go back, please.

00:44:15.000 If the person believes in God, the 214 General Social Survey reported that 21% of Americans had no religion, with 3% being atheists and 5% agnostic.

00:44:26.000 That's not even as much as I thought.

00:44:28.000 It's not that many people, man.

00:44:29.000 That's a bummer.

00:44:30.000 You cannot be, I just don't think, I shouldn't say this in a blanket term, because maybe it can happen, but I just think it's not a good strategy if you're just trying to get into office.

00:44:39.000 Because Trump was never religious, and now he talks about God all the time.

00:44:43.000 Now it's all, you know, God this and God that.

00:44:46.000 It's a strategy.

00:44:47.000 I mean, it's like words that you have to say, like ma'am and sir, that don't totally make sense to you.

00:44:52.000 Well, did you, I heard the, uh, I think the governor or maybe it's the mayor of Florida when the hurricane is about to hit, I'm watching, I'm just balls deep in it on the hurricane stuff.

00:45:00.000 He's interviewing, he goes, you know what, you know, your money's great, but the biggest thing is you just pray for us.

00:45:05.000 Just keep praying for us.

00:45:06.000 That's all we need.

00:45:06.000 We need your prayers before this thing hits.

00:45:08.000 I'm like, dude, you better figure shit out.

00:45:10.000 Like that, that, it sounds good.

00:45:12.000 And he was, everything, just keep praying for us.

00:45:15.000 Just pray.

00:45:16.000 That's all I ask.

00:45:16.000 Everyone here pray for us.

00:45:17.000 I'm like, man, you need more than that, brother.

00:45:20.000 I get it.

00:45:21.000 May it work, bro.

00:45:23.000 Did you see this going around yesterday afternoon?

00:45:25.000 Facebook got in trouble after some people were digging into the advertising thing that was going around also yesterday with the algorithms.

00:45:33.000 Some people were looking into the Russian.

00:45:35.000 I think someone uncovered that $100,000 had been paid to either some Russian ad agency or something.

00:45:40.000 I didn't follow the exact story, but digging into that, they found this.

00:45:45.000 Jew-haters?

00:45:46.000 What's the ad?

00:45:47.000 An algorithm created this tag to people and labeled them as Jew-haters, and so someone could buy a targeted ad to them, and what I guess they were assuming is that Trump people did it, or they were...

00:45:58.000 Hold on.

00:45:59.000 Hold on.

00:45:59.000 You're not saying this right.

00:46:00.000 Sorry.

00:46:01.000 Explain this more clearly.

00:46:03.000 So someone could put an ad on your page...

00:46:05.000 No, no, no.

00:46:06.000 I could put out an ad if I was buying for Hillary, for instance, in this situation, or for Trump, and target it towards people that were labeled as Jew-haters.

00:46:17.000 Only the Jew-haters will see it.

00:46:20.000 Within Facebook.

00:46:21.000 Okay, so Facebook has a category of Jew-haters?

00:46:25.000 And they're saying it was done by a computer algorithm, not by a person.

00:46:30.000 It just sort of happened.

00:46:31.000 What?

00:46:32.000 Yeah, and it's still being uncovered right now.

00:46:35.000 Yesterday, Jew Haters was trending on Twitter, and I was like, what is going on?

00:46:39.000 Jesus Christ.

00:46:41.000 That's why Facebook advertising is the best that there is, for anyone.

00:46:45.000 Because of the algorithms.

00:46:46.000 Yeah, because you can pick out a certain demographic.

00:46:49.000 If you have a show in San Francisco or in L.A., you can literally pick everyone in a 10-mile radius, and they will see that ad.

00:46:55.000 But that is such a crazy thing.

00:46:57.000 So for a Jew hater, you can figure it out.

00:46:58.000 Yeah, but what a crazy thing, the idea that you could reach a group of...

00:47:02.000 How about don't allow those people to be there?

00:47:05.000 Don't let them make Jewish accounts. 0.99

00:47:07.000 In the same vein, I was going to ask you a second ago, when you said you were looking at Anthony Bourdain's Twitter account, you saw a bunch of hate.

00:47:13.000 Yeah.

00:47:14.000 Do you think that that could be bots?

00:47:17.000 Let me correct that.

00:47:19.000 It wasn't Anthony Bourdain's Twitter account.

00:47:21.000 It was under the tweet by TMZ that showed the video.

00:47:26.000 Then there was all the hate.

00:47:27.000 But I'm sure they probably went to his.

00:47:28.000 This makes it even easier to do then.

00:47:30.000 You could specifically buy Buy that hate for cheap.

00:47:35.000 You can buy that, but they also hire people that might be multiple trolls.

00:47:40.000 What does that mean, buy that hate?

00:47:42.000 You could send the messages that you want, you could set up a couple keywords, and 500 accounts will just start sending those messages out.

00:47:48.000 Fake accounts?

00:47:50.000 Yeah, but how many people are going to go look through to find out how many of those accounts are fake?

00:47:53.000 Okay, but do you have to write out the tweet for those fake accounts?

00:47:58.000 It'll fill in the words.

00:47:59.000 Holy shit!

00:48:00.000 So how do you know if someone is doing that?

00:48:04.000 Great question.

00:48:05.000 They're finding that on YouTube, Facebook, Twitter.

00:48:08.000 They're finding it everywhere on the internet right now.

00:48:09.000 How do they know?

00:48:10.000 Well, they can tell by the algorithms and the computer programmers can figure it out.

00:48:15.000 Can they?

00:48:15.000 Fake accounts for sure.

00:48:16.000 And that's why when Twitter and Instagram, they can do a flush of all those bot accounts.

00:48:20.000 So you'll see a lot of people's followers, like Kim Kardashian, she lost like 3 million because they're a bunch of bot accounts, like fake accounts.

00:48:27.000 Well, there's so many fake...

00:48:28.000 I thought she lost 3 million when people saw her real ass. 1.00

00:48:31.000 Good lord.

00:48:32.000 Really?

00:48:33.000 Did you see that?

00:48:34.000 No.

00:48:34.000 I've seen the porno.

00:48:35.000 Did you see that Mexican disaster? 1.00

00:48:37.000 No.

00:48:37.000 She was on the beach in Mexico and she didn't have her own photographer.

00:48:40.000 Here's the thing.

00:48:42.000 Do whatever you want.

00:48:43.000 I don't want to body shame.

00:48:45.000 Yes, I do.

00:48:47.000 But let me just explain my position on this.

00:48:50.000 When she shows all these pictures of her giant, perfect ass, she's showing an extremely unrealistic representation of a human being.

00:49:00.000 So what she does is she hires a photographer to follow her everywhere and take pictures, and then they Photoshop the shit out of them, they clean away all the lumps, and then she looks amazing, right? 0.89

00:49:10.000 So when she was on the beach, They were taking pictures of her and she didn't know they were there.

00:49:16.000 That is a dumper.

00:49:17.000 That's gross.

00:49:18.000 That is a dumper.

00:49:19.000 Okay, but here's the thing.

00:49:19.000 That's not real.

00:49:20.000 That is all fat that someone stuffed into your ass like a giant diaper. 0.98

00:49:25.000 And when they smooth it out and put it on Instagram with all the retouches and everything like that, this forces women to think that this is possible. 0.93

00:49:35.000 But this is normal.

00:49:36.000 My girl's ass beasters, by the way. 1.00

00:49:37.000 But it's real.

00:49:38.000 It's real.

00:49:39.000 And she's got a body that makes sense. 0.96

00:49:41.000 And she makes her look like Mr. Burns' ass. 1.00

00:49:43.000 Heck, if you have a giant head and then a tiny little nose, like one of them plastic surgery noses, people are going to go, hey, what's going on here?

00:49:50.000 This isn't right.

00:49:51.000 Like, you did something weird.

00:49:53.000 What she's doing is, it's not only not hot, the problem is she becomes famous and then it becomes a thing that people do. 0.99

00:50:00.000 Now, hold on.

00:50:02.000 Remember when we were talking about wigs?

00:50:03.000 Weren't you here when we were talking about powdered wigs?

00:50:05.000 Was that you?

00:50:06.000 Yeah, it was you and me that had big wigs. 0.98

00:50:07.000 Think about that.

00:50:08.000 These fucking guys with syphilis that were losing their hair and started wearing wigs, everybody started shaving their head and wearing those goddamn powdered wigs because they looked like those guys. 0.87

00:50:17.000 They wanted to be cool.

00:50:18.000 You cannot hate on Kim Kardashian for making asses cool, my man.

00:50:21.000 No.

00:50:21.000 She's done us a service.

00:50:23.000 How dare you?

00:50:23.000 It's not a real ass.

00:50:24.000 She didn't make asses cool. 1.00

00:50:26.000 J-Lo made asses cool way before Kim Kardashian.

00:50:28.000 I saw her ass in person. 1.00

00:50:30.000 And her shit was legit.

00:50:31.000 Super legit.

00:50:32.000 I'm tight.

00:50:33.000 That's a real ass. 0.99

00:50:34.000 This is a disaster.

00:50:36.000 This is my problem with Kim Kardashian.

00:50:38.000 Not my problem with Kim Kardashian.

00:50:39.000 Granted, she's influenced a lot of people, and I would not kick her out of bed for you fucking graham crackers. 0.99

00:50:44.000 Look at those pictures.

00:50:45.000 Yeah, I know.

00:50:46.000 Those pictures have been sent to a cartoonist.

00:50:48.000 Yeah, whatever.

00:50:50.000 They're not real.

00:50:50.000 The problem is, is her sister, her little sister.

00:50:53.000 So, like, my nanny's daughter's always around our house.

00:50:56.000 She's 12?

00:50:57.000 She's in seventh grade.

00:50:59.000 Every, most girls, especially in middle school, high school, everyone looks at Kylie Jenner like she's a fucking, like she's Prince Diana. 1.00

00:51:08.000 Like they think she's the shit.

00:51:09.000 Have you seen what that bitch has gone through? 1.00

00:51:12.000 It's insane, the plastic surgery you said.

00:51:15.000 You're talking complete reconstruction of her face, body, ass, titties, ribs.

00:51:21.000 Completely different person.

00:51:23.000 Skull reconstruction.

00:51:24.000 It's nuts, man.

00:51:25.000 You shaved her chin down.

00:51:26.000 Yes, and cheekbones to make her look like Kim and her ass. 1.00

00:51:29.000 Dude, they cut into the bone in her jaw. 1.00

00:51:31.000 When she was 16. What the fuck are we doing?

00:51:35.000 But now all these little girls look up to her like she's this huge role model. 0.86

00:51:39.000 And I ask them, like, why?

00:51:41.000 Why do you like her?

00:51:43.000 They're like, just the life.

00:51:44.000 And then, you know, she comes out with all this stuff.

00:51:47.000 She has Louis Vuitton.

00:51:48.000 She's driving G-Wagons and all this.

00:51:49.000 And they think, like, oh, that's what I need to get to.

00:51:52.000 Listen to me, man.

00:51:52.000 Big wigs.

00:51:53.000 Big wigs.

00:51:54.000 It's the same thing.

00:51:55.000 It's the same goddamn thing.

00:51:56.000 It's those dudes wearing wigs that everybody sees and they think they're the shit and so they want to copy them.

00:52:01.000 That's why it's dangerous.

00:52:02.000 A wig's different though.

00:52:03.000 It is, but it's not.

00:52:04.000 Same theory.

00:52:05.000 But it's the same theory.

00:52:07.000 It's the same thing that happens to people.

00:52:08.000 But what she's doing is bonkers. 0.82

00:52:10.000 But it doesn't matter.

00:52:12.000 It becomes a trend and then people get sucked into that trend and she becomes important. 0.99

00:52:16.000 Here's why I'm mad at myself.

00:52:17.000 I'm not mad at her.

00:52:19.000 Stop it all.

00:52:19.000 I don't want to look at these pictures.

00:52:20.000 Stop it, Jamie.

00:52:21.000 Jamie loves the shit.

00:52:22.000 He's like, yes, they're talking gossip.

00:52:24.000 Jamie's like me.

00:52:25.000 I'm the one explaining all of it?

00:52:26.000 Okay.

00:52:27.000 He'll come in.

00:52:27.000 Jamie will come in.

00:52:28.000 Do you hear what happened with Beyonce and Jay-Z? I'll go, no!

00:52:31.000 I'm with you, Jay.

00:52:32.000 I'm with you, man.

00:52:33.000 I'm the same.

00:52:33.000 Beyonce and Jay-Z are apparently having issues.

00:52:36.000 Having issues?

00:52:37.000 Did you hear the tweet?

00:52:39.000 Kanye and Jay-Z are back.

00:52:40.000 They're back together?

00:52:41.000 Yes.

00:52:42.000 Figured it out.

00:52:43.000 Get him his fucking Ritalin.

00:52:45.000 But with her, I get why people look at her and go, she's beautiful.

00:52:49.000 I'm mad at myself being like, goddamn, she's fine, man.

00:52:51.000 She's beautiful.

00:52:51.000 She's hot.

00:52:52.000 She's not an ugly woman.

00:52:54.000 No, no.

00:52:55.000 She's sexy now. 1.00

00:52:56.000 You mean the young daughter?

00:52:57.000 Whoa.

00:52:58.000 Oh, I thought you were talking about Kim.

00:52:59.000 Oh, no.

00:53:00.000 Kim's great.

00:53:00.000 I'm talking about Kylie, who I think she's 21. But before, you know, basic white girl.

00:53:05.000 Average, flat-ass white girl. 1.00

00:53:06.000 Then now she's this video vixen.

00:53:08.000 Right.

00:53:08.000 And I'm not mad at her.

00:53:09.000 Didn't she think that grabbing that ass would be like a water balloon? 1.00

00:53:12.000 Have you ever felt...

00:53:14.000 No.

00:53:15.000 What's it like?

00:53:16.000 Pretty glorious.

00:53:17.000 Really?

00:53:18.000 A fake one?

00:53:18.000 No, no, no.

00:53:19.000 Not if they have implants.

00:53:20.000 But they can take fat from their stomach or their thighs and they inject the fat into the ass. 1.00

00:53:24.000 No difference.

00:53:25.000 Right, but when they waddle over to the bathroom and you see their ass going back and forth like a waterbed, doesn't that freak you out?

00:53:31.000 Nah, it encourages me to do.

00:53:32.000 There was a video of, what is that, Iggy Azalea?

00:53:38.000 Iggy Azalea.

00:53:39.000 Whatever her name is.

00:53:39.000 Is that right?

00:53:40.000 There was a video of her shaking her ass and someone sent it to me. 0.98

00:53:43.000 They go, dude, what in the fuck is this?

00:53:45.000 Was it cool?

00:53:46.000 No.

00:53:46.000 She's wearing these skin-tight pants, and as she's shaking her ass, it's like...

00:53:50.000 You ever try to fuck on a waterbed?

00:53:52.000 Yeah, it's a nightmare.

00:53:53.000 Yeah, I had one when I was 21. It was a disaster.

00:53:55.000 I had one as a kid.

00:53:56.000 And then I swapped it out for one with baffles, which is actually pretty badass.

00:54:00.000 A waterbed that is...

00:54:01.000 Yeah, baffles are, it's not one giant bag.

00:54:04.000 It's a bunch of tubes.

00:54:06.000 That makes more sense.

00:54:07.000 So that when you get in there, it's pretty firm, but you feel the cool, the warmth in the waterbed.

00:54:10.000 Oh, that sounds nice.

00:54:11.000 It's pretty dope.

00:54:12.000 And you can fuck with one of those.

00:54:15.000 But with the other one, it's like...

00:54:17.000 Nightmare.

00:54:17.000 Oh, it's a nightmare.

00:54:18.000 It's like trying to fuck on a whale.

00:54:20.000 It's horrible.

00:54:21.000 That's a fucking nightmare.

00:54:22.000 It's like trying to fuck while you're paddleboarding.

00:54:25.000 It's trying to fuck on one of those vibrating machines.

00:54:28.000 It's just a nightmare.

00:54:30.000 So that's what her ass looks like. 1.00

00:54:32.000 She's shaking her ass and it's going back and forth and back and forth like some crazy ass camel thing. 1.00

00:54:39.000 Like you're storing water in that thing.

00:54:41.000 Ass camel? 1.00

00:54:43.000 It's like a camel hump.

00:54:44.000 Storing fruit back there?

00:54:46.000 She's storing water in it.

00:54:47.000 It's like there's something going on.

00:54:49.000 It doesn't make any sense.

00:54:51.000 Who's this?

00:54:54.000 I mean, I'm not...

00:54:54.000 That's fine right there.

00:54:55.000 That's not the video.

00:54:56.000 That's a music video.

00:54:57.000 There was a video of her dancing on stage.

00:55:00.000 See, I wish I didn't like that stuff.

00:55:02.000 In pink pants.

00:55:02.000 Yeah, but this is like...

00:55:04.000 This is a...

00:55:04.000 That's a music video.

00:55:05.000 You might as well be looking at it.

00:55:06.000 That's a cartoon.

00:55:07.000 It's different colors.

00:55:08.000 It's negative, you know?

00:55:10.000 But that's the culture we live in.

00:55:12.000 That's what we like.

00:55:13.000 Not we, sir.

00:55:15.000 Not we.

00:55:16.000 You don't like big titties and big asses. 1.00

00:55:17.000 I don't like that disaster, and I don't like the trend.

00:55:19.000 I didn't ask that.

00:55:20.000 You like big titties and asses. 1.00

00:55:21.000 I like CrossFit chicks. 1.00

00:55:23.000 I like chicks that do squats and shit. 1.00

00:55:25.000 I like chicks that look good. 1.00

00:55:27.000 They look strong and healthy.

00:55:28.000 That's what looks good to me.

00:55:30.000 Like Callan's strong and healthy type of chicks?

00:55:32.000 Callan?

00:55:33.000 He's not here.

00:55:34.000 Let's leave him out of this.

00:55:35.000 Well, Callan loves the big, bulky, shredded girl who, if she had a dick, you'd be like, oh, that makes sense. 0.69

00:55:40.000 Yeah, no.

00:55:41.000 I'm into girls that look like girls. 1.00

00:55:42.000 You like fit girls.

00:55:43.000 They look like girls who lift. 1.00

00:55:45.000 Me too.

00:55:46.000 I'm with that.

00:55:46.000 That way, when you see their ass, you know that is an earned ass.

00:55:50.000 That's not some fat experiment in Dr. Frankenstein's lab.

00:55:54.000 I don't have to picture you with a tube running down your mouth to keep you alive.

00:55:58.000 But you got a fucking, you know, your nose is taped up and you're lying there with your eyes rolled back in your head while they fucking pumping into your ass like a caulking gun.

00:56:08.000 They're both at the same...

00:56:11.000 No, it's not!

00:56:12.000 It just depends, Joe.

00:56:13.000 The woman doesn't look as healthy, they're not as vibrant. 1.00

00:56:16.000 You see, a woman that's in shape... 1.00

00:56:18.000 She has some calluses with her dick up, though. 1.00

00:56:20.000 Like a man who's in shape.

00:56:22.000 It's the same thing.

00:56:23.000 People like things that are healthy.

00:56:27.000 You're talking about sex, right?

00:56:30.000 You don't want to have sex with someone who's sick.

00:56:33.000 Right?

00:56:33.000 You don't want to have sex with someone who doesn't feel good.

00:56:35.000 You don't want to have sex with someone who's like, I'm barely making it. 1.00

00:56:38.000 Like, if you get a staph infection because someone's been pumping fat into your asshole, and then all of a sudden you're feeling sad, but you still have this big ass, is that sexy?

00:56:46.000 No!

00:56:47.000 That's not fun.

00:56:48.000 It's not exciting.

00:56:49.000 Like, you're looking at an unhealthy person's body, like, you look at her body like, that's not a working out body.

00:56:55.000 She doesn't work out. 0.94

00:56:57.000 If she does, she's working hard.

00:56:58.000 That's a lazy person's body.

00:57:00.000 For sure.

00:57:00.000 They want results, they want tomorrow.

00:57:02.000 And I'm not saying lazy person like, mom, that is a full-time job.

00:57:05.000 Listen, if you can't work out, I'm not blaming you.

00:57:07.000 If you don't want to work out, I'm not blaming you.

00:57:09.000 But if your fucking job is only to be a professional hot chick, and that's your body. 1.00

00:57:16.000 Bitch, you better work out. 1.00

00:57:17.000 Yeah.

00:57:18.000 You gotta get on that horse.

00:57:19.000 At least eat organic.

00:57:20.000 That's what I'm talking about!

00:57:22.000 I like that.

00:57:23.000 I also love that.

00:57:24.000 Woo! 0.99

00:57:25.000 I like a gal.

00:57:26.000 I like a gal who does some deadlifts. 1.00

00:57:28.000 I like how she's using those pads to cover her shins. 1.00

00:57:31.000 There's something gross about girls with scarred up shins. 1.00

00:57:33.000 Unless they fight.

00:57:34.000 Unless they do Muay Thai.

00:57:35.000 And then it's kind of hot again.

00:57:36.000 Even then.

00:57:36.000 Then it's hot again.

00:57:37.000 Even then.

00:57:38.000 Just a gangster-ass chick with... 1.00

00:57:40.000 That was a good picture, Jamie.

00:57:42.000 I feel like bodies should be earned in the gym.

00:57:46.000 I mean, I just feel like pumping some stuff into your ass is...

00:57:50.000 What about titties, then?

00:57:51.000 But it's a trick.

00:57:52.000 What about titties? 0.88

00:57:53.000 That's where I vacillate.

00:57:54.000 Exactly, sir.

00:57:56.000 This is where I find holes in your game.

00:57:57.000 But here's the thing, you can't earn titties.

00:57:59.000 That's why I let it go.

00:58:01.000 Because you can't earn them.

00:58:02.000 You can earn an ass.

00:58:03.000 Well, kind of.

00:58:04.000 Some genetics.

00:58:05.000 A little bit.

00:58:06.000 Some of us genetics.

00:58:07.000 Yeah, but I mean, come on.

00:58:08.000 Let's just be honest about what we're talking about here.

00:58:10.000 You can do some squats and deadlift, some lunges, build that ass up, eat carbs.

00:58:14.000 And even the genetics thing.

00:58:15.000 How much?

00:58:15.000 You could probably affect it.

00:58:16.000 You might not be able to get to J-Lo levels, but I bet you get to pretty perky levels.

00:58:21.000 Sometimes.

00:58:22.000 I don't know.

00:58:22.000 I don't know who's doing what.

00:58:24.000 I don't know how they're working out.

00:58:25.000 I don't know if they got a good trainer.

00:58:26.000 I don't know if they lift heavy.

00:58:27.000 Yeah, I'd have to see their program.

00:58:29.000 Yeah, you'd have to see their program.

00:58:30.000 You'd have to find out what their diet is. 0.72

00:58:31.000 People make a lot of goddamn excuses.

00:58:33.000 True, but sometimes genetics are genetics.

00:58:35.000 Like, Jamie's not going to get as big as fucking Yoel Romero.

00:58:38.000 It's just not in the cards.

00:58:39.000 100% true, right?

00:58:41.000 Genetics do come into factor, but when you just blame genetics for everything, it's like, okay, but did you work?

00:58:46.000 How hard did you work?

00:58:48.000 Did you try?

00:58:48.000 Did you advance at all?

00:58:50.000 Yeah, I agree.

00:58:50.000 Where was your starting point?

00:58:51.000 Where are you at now?

00:58:52.000 And how much effort did you put in along the way?

00:58:53.000 And you're cool with titties because- Oh, Lord!

00:58:55.000 That's a real woman's ass! 1.00

00:58:57.000 She is so real.

00:58:59.000 She's 40 how old?

00:59:00.000 80. 85 years old.

00:59:02.000 She might be 50. You know what the good thing about that?

00:59:04.000 You can shoot loads in there all day long and nothing's happening.

00:59:07.000 All day long.

00:59:08.000 No one's home.

00:59:09.000 Yep.

00:59:09.000 Game over.

00:59:10.000 I think they're about to have a kid or they're trying to.

00:59:12.000 No.

00:59:12.000 A-Rod and her?

00:59:13.000 They're trying to.

00:59:14.000 Everybody's trying to.

00:59:15.000 You're all practicing.

00:59:15.000 I would try.

00:59:17.000 I saw her at the fight and I was like, I would impregnate her right now and figure it out. 0.96

00:59:21.000 No, she's probably still viable for another four or five years. 0.99

00:59:24.000 With her genetics?

00:59:25.000 Yeah.

00:59:25.000 Dude, she is a straight smoke show.

00:59:27.000 Yeah, that's superior genetics.

00:59:30.000 That's Latina superior genetics. 0.74

00:59:32.000 Correct.

00:59:33.000 But also hard work.

00:59:35.000 She works out hard, man.

00:59:37.000 Oh, yeah.

00:59:37.000 Have you ever seen her dance routines and all the stuff that she does?

00:59:39.000 She works out hard.

00:59:42.000 100%.

00:59:43.000 Yeah, I mean, she's a professional hot chick who's also a singer, who's also an actress. 1.00

00:59:47.000 She has talent.

00:59:48.000 These other girls' talent out do not. 1.00

00:59:50.000 Right.

00:59:50.000 But she also works hard.

00:59:51.000 See?

00:59:52.000 Super hard.

00:59:52.000 That's what I think.

00:59:53.000 That's sexy.

00:59:54.000 Yeah.

00:59:54.000 And that's what I think, like, if you want to aspire, like, if you want to be a man, right?

00:59:58.000 You want to be built like The Rock, right?

01:00:01.000 I see The Rock on the fucking Instagram, in the gym, every goddamn day.

01:00:05.000 We're out here.

01:00:05.000 We're getting it done.

01:00:06.000 You know, nobody works harder.

01:00:07.000 All right.

01:00:08.000 Have a good day, everybody!

01:00:09.000 He's all inspiring and shit.

01:00:11.000 He's jacked to the fucking gills.

01:00:13.000 He looks huge, right?

01:00:15.000 Clearly, MPDs, but yeah.

01:00:16.000 Clearly.

01:00:17.000 But that's an earned physique.

01:00:19.000 He's not stuffing fucking silicone plates in his muscles to puff him up.

01:00:23.000 He's not injecting synthol in there to look like one of them crazy Popeye dudes.

01:00:27.000 He's injecting other stuff, though.

01:00:28.000 It's a form.

01:00:29.000 But he's working out hard.

01:00:31.000 True, to get there.

01:00:32.000 He's working out hard.

01:00:33.000 I don't know what his test levels are.

01:00:35.000 They're probably elevated.

01:00:36.000 It's working!

01:00:38.000 It's working hard!

01:00:41.000 The point is, even with drugs, that's accessible.

01:00:45.000 It's still hard work.

01:00:46.000 Yes, and it's still a real muscle.

01:00:48.000 Where I draw the line.

01:00:50.000 Look, if girls could take a steroid that made them grow an ass, There wouldn't be a flat ass on the planet Earth! 1.00

01:00:57.000 Only in England.

01:00:57.000 There would be no girls!

01:00:59.000 The difference between girls and men is that. 0.91

01:01:00.000 Because there's a lot of guys who don't want to take steroids.

01:01:03.000 They're like, fuck that, I'm not gonna do that.

01:01:04.000 Most of them don't.

01:01:04.000 If steroids existed for women's asses, it would be as common as Botox.

01:01:09.000 They would all be jamming it in there.

01:01:11.000 Even more common.

01:01:12.000 Even more.

01:01:12.000 It'd be like being on the pill.

01:01:14.000 It'd be like here or die.

01:01:15.000 Yeah.

01:01:15.000 Every girl would have a fat ass.

01:01:17.000 If you could afford it.

01:01:18.000 If they could figure out a way to break...

01:01:20.000 Like I was driving on the street the other day, I saw a sign that said Botox, $12.

01:01:23.000 God, Doug, that's a deal.

01:01:25.000 For sure don't go there.

01:01:26.000 They will give you Bell's palsy.

01:01:31.000 So you had a stroke?

01:01:32.000 That's apparently a very tricky process.

01:01:35.000 You've got to know when you're shooting that stuff.

01:01:36.000 Fuck yeah.

01:01:37.000 I saw a deal for LASIK eye surgery.

01:01:40.000 Buy one, get one.

01:01:41.000 In Venice, buy one, get one.

01:01:43.000 No, you cannot do that.

01:01:44.000 You cannot skimp on your eyeballs.

01:01:47.000 Please go to reputablelaserysurgeon.com Buy one, get one next to the weed clinic.

01:01:52.000 You don't want a deal on an eye surgery.

01:01:54.000 You do not want a deal on eye surgery, ass surgery, or tattoos.

01:01:58.000 Did you hear about that one person that got arrested?

01:02:00.000 They were giving people ass jobs, and they were pretending to be a doctor, and they weren't a doctor, and they were shooting all kinds of stuff into people's asses.

01:02:07.000 They were shooting cement.

01:02:10.000 Cement into the ass of these people.

01:02:13.000 Oh my god.

01:02:14.000 God damn.

01:02:14.000 What's wrong with people?

01:02:16.000 People are crazy.

01:02:17.000 They're crazy.

01:02:17.000 It's Kim Kardashian.

01:02:18.000 I blame Kim Kardashian.

01:02:20.000 She's a big reason.

01:02:20.000 For that lady having a cement ass.

01:02:21.000 Because that lady's working at Walgreens like, fuck, I want to look like Kim Kardashian. 1.00

01:02:24.000 You grab her ass and you literally feel a rock of cement and they're like, what?

01:02:28.000 Do you have a tumor?

01:02:30.000 Is this cancer?

01:02:31.000 Is this a fucking kidney stone that didn't pass?

01:02:34.000 It got lodged up in your ass cheek?

01:02:36.000 It's nuts, man.

01:02:37.000 It made a ways through your hip and just lodged itself.

01:02:40.000 But here's the thing.

01:02:41.000 With titties, I'm all about them.

01:02:42.000 I'm all about implants.

01:02:44.000 We go back to the thing.

01:02:44.000 You cannot earn big breasts.

01:02:47.000 You can't earn them.

01:02:48.000 So what about guys with calf implants?

01:02:50.000 Do you celebrate that?

01:02:51.000 No.

01:02:51.000 John Jones doesn't need them.

01:02:53.000 John Jones needs him and he doesn't need him.

01:02:54.000 How about that?

01:02:55.000 John Jones has the calf of an ankle.

01:02:58.000 And he doesn't care.

01:03:00.000 Not like a Samoan ankle. 0.99

01:03:02.000 He has the calf of a white girl ankle. 0.72

01:03:04.000 By the way, there's a glorious picture of Mark Hunt with a fanny pack that I put on Instagram today.

01:03:09.000 And a Hulk Hogan stash.

01:03:10.000 Yeah, how about that fanny pack?

01:03:11.000 Yeah, that fanny pack's pretty gangster.

01:03:13.000 So, please, buy, support.

01:03:15.000 Mark Hunt's new book is out now.

01:03:18.000 Yeah, look at that.

01:03:19.000 It's a fucking camo fanny pack.

01:03:21.000 Extra points!

01:03:24.000 He's so gangster.

01:03:25.000 He's the most gangster guy ever.

01:03:26.000 I do love that stash.

01:03:28.000 You know, I saw an article, though, an interview they did with him that was very sad and disappointing.

01:03:38.000 About his upbringing?

01:03:40.000 No, no, no.

01:03:41.000 That was terrible, too.

01:03:42.000 That's a rough story.

01:03:42.000 He overcame that.

01:03:43.000 It wasn't about that.

01:03:45.000 It was about his brain damage.

01:03:47.000 Oh, really?

01:03:48.000 What was he saying?

01:03:48.000 Saying he's already starting to slur his words and forget things.

01:03:52.000 That mustache and fanny pack shows me that.

01:03:54.000 I look for signs.

01:03:55.000 When I saw the mustache and that fanny pack, it was glorious.

01:03:58.000 You can't be afraid of the fanny pack.

01:03:59.000 I wear a fanny pack every day when I run.

01:04:01.000 Do you?

01:04:01.000 I don't wear it to the goddamn supermarket like a psycho.

01:04:04.000 I do.

01:04:05.000 I do.

01:04:05.000 They make sense, though, when you think about them.

01:04:07.000 They're awesome.

01:04:08.000 I just don't.

01:04:09.000 I just don't.

01:04:09.000 You should.

01:04:10.000 Do you want one?

01:04:11.000 I'd be down.

01:04:12.000 Okay, I'll give you one more.

01:04:13.000 All right, thanks, bro.

01:04:14.000 He was saying that he has brain trauma?

01:04:16.000 Yeah.

01:04:16.000 No shit, sir.

01:04:18.000 Yeah, no shit for sure, we know, but he was talking about it, that he's slurring his words and he's having trouble remembering things.

01:04:25.000 But he also said he was born to do this.

01:04:28.000 This is what he's supposed to do, and if he dies doing this, he'd be fine with that.

01:04:31.000 But there's a caveat to that.

01:04:33.000 He said, if I die in the ring, like I want to die in the ring, go out on my shield, but it better not be from someone who's on PEDs.

01:04:40.000 Yeah, and that's a really good point.

01:04:42.000 Four people out of the last five people he fought have either tested positive for PEDs or tested...

01:04:49.000 No, I think it was all PEDs because it was Brock.

01:04:52.000 All of them.

01:04:52.000 It was Alistair's test positive in the past for PEDs, Verdum, and Bigfoot.

01:04:58.000 And JDS right now is on...

01:05:01.000 It's a diuretic.

01:05:01.000 But I'm just saying, as far as failing tests, if you would just go by failed tests, if you look at Mark Hunt's career, and you went through, and guys that have tests positive, you're like, oh my, no wonder he's infuriated at people.

01:05:14.000 And he has brain trauma.

01:05:15.000 He's also superior genetics.

01:05:17.000 Like, Mark Hunt's genetics are insane.

01:05:19.000 Like, his ability to take a punch for years was ungodly.

01:05:23.000 You would see him get hit, and you'd be like, this doesn't even make sense.

01:05:26.000 He took crow-cop head kicks, bro.

01:05:29.000 What are you looking at?

01:05:30.000 What are you showing me?

01:05:31.000 Ah, let's just go through them.

01:05:32.000 Cro-Cop, Overeem, Silva.

01:05:35.000 Silva is tested positive.

01:05:37.000 Did Verdum test positive for something?

01:05:39.000 Yes.

01:05:40.000 Verdum, when did he test positive?

01:05:42.000 A while ago.

01:05:43.000 Okay, so not Stipe.

01:05:47.000 Stipe is 100% legit.

01:05:48.000 Stipe is as clean as they come.

01:05:50.000 There's Bigfoot Silva again.

01:05:51.000 How dare you?

01:05:52.000 He had a draw with him the first time.

01:05:54.000 He crushed him the second time.

01:05:56.000 Because the second time, USADA was involved and Bigfoot Silva wasn't on the juice.

01:06:00.000 The first time Bigfoot Silva was on the juice, he tested positive.

01:06:06.000 Not only that, he tested negative before the fight and positive after the fight.

01:06:09.000 Which means he juiced himself up before the fight.

01:06:12.000 And they had that incredible, epic five-round war.

01:06:16.000 You remember that fight?

01:06:16.000 I remember the fight.

01:06:17.000 It was so epic that Dana White had a bunch of Mark Hunt, Bigfoot, two.

01:06:24.000 They made, like, for two.

01:06:25.000 Before two ever happened, they printed up the jackets for two, and he sent me one.

01:06:30.000 And I was like, dude, I'm all in.

01:06:31.000 That was one of the craziest fights of all time.

01:06:33.000 And then, a week later, Bigfoot tests positive.

01:06:36.000 And he's like, this dumb motherfucker, like, this could have been, like, this incredible...

01:06:40.000 Yeah, I mean, it was just...

01:06:41.000 Anthony Joshua Klitschko style.

01:06:43.000 Incredible, incredible matchup, right?

01:06:44.000 So he tests positive, and then USADA's on his ass.

01:06:48.000 Then they come back for the second fight, and Mark Hunt just smokes him in the first round.

01:06:53.000 I mean, just rammed through him.

01:06:55.000 But you just look at him, so you got Bigfoot, JDS is, you know, he's having his issues.

01:06:59.000 Then you got Ben Rothwell busted.

01:07:01.000 What I was going to say, though, is if anybody legitimately has a reason for using steroids, it's Bigfoot.

01:07:07.000 Because Bigfoot has real gigantism, and he had a tumor removed from his pituitary gland.

01:07:12.000 Like, his body doesn't produce testosterone right, or any hormones right.

01:07:16.000 His body's a wreck.

01:07:17.000 This is a gray area.

01:07:19.000 No, it's not gray.

01:07:20.000 He had a tumor.

01:07:21.000 He had to get brain surgery.

01:07:22.000 He had a tumor on his pituitary gland.

01:07:24.000 I'm aware of that.

01:07:24.000 Look at him.

01:07:25.000 So even if you give him TRT, you'd have to regulate so much where he doesn't have such an advantage.

01:07:31.000 I'm not saying you should.

01:07:32.000 Because him without it is awful.

01:07:35.000 You can't even compete.

01:07:35.000 I'm saying more than that, maybe you shouldn't be able to compete.

01:07:40.000 That's what I'm saying.

01:07:40.000 Maybe this isn't the business for you if you have to have testosterone to compete.

01:07:44.000 Unless you want to go to Russia or Japan.

01:07:46.000 Which is what he's doing.

01:07:48.000 And he's getting murked out there.

01:07:49.000 Oh, well, he's probably done.

01:07:50.000 I mean, he's had so many crazy, crazy fights.

01:07:53.000 But he was the first guy to TKO Fedor.

01:07:56.000 Yeah, he was the first.

01:07:57.000 Remember that shit when he mounted him?

01:07:58.000 Remember when Fedor went for that ankle lock and his just giant fucking finger going like this?

01:08:03.000 Yeah.

01:08:04.000 And then just did work on him.

01:08:04.000 Yeah, Fedor was done.

01:08:06.000 Because Fedor, in all seriousness, should have been a 205 pounder.

01:08:09.000 He's just a tank who's just unbelievably talented and ridiculously skillful in his execution and just figured out a way to win.

01:08:19.000 Was lightning fast and fucked a lot of people up.

01:08:22.000 But goddammit, could you imagine if he got himself in ferocious shape at 205?

01:08:28.000 Nuts, man.

01:08:28.000 I can't imagine.

01:08:29.000 Dude, he was only like 240, right?

01:08:31.000 Yeah, 230, right?

01:08:32.000 230, and a good solid 20 pounds of fat.

01:08:36.000 100%.

01:08:36.000 Yeah, so he's really like 218, which ain't shit to cut to 205. Nothing.

01:08:41.000 What?

01:08:42.000 Anthony Johnson goes, what?

01:08:43.000 Yeah, if he changed his diet, who knows?

01:08:44.000 He might literally be like 207. You know, if he lost all that weight.

01:08:49.000 Explosive.

01:08:49.000 Yeah, he's got a real belly and a side gut.

01:08:51.000 Straight up Russian dad gut. 0.97

01:08:53.000 Yeah, I mean, that might be 25 pounds.

01:08:56.000 You know, I mean, he literally might be like 210. Back to Mark Hunt, and this is bombing me.

01:09:01.000 I gotta get this out.

01:09:02.000 So he says, hey, I see signs of brain trauma, right?

01:09:05.000 Yeah.

01:09:05.000 Like, I'm slurring my words speech.

01:09:07.000 Then isn't he a main event next month?

01:09:09.000 Yeah.

01:09:09.000 Like, at what point does, when you hear that, does the UFC and the commission go, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, let's stop, let's stop, let's stop.

01:09:15.000 Yeah.

01:09:16.000 You're slurring your words again.

01:09:17.000 Who's he fighting?

01:09:18.000 That Russian cat was ranked like 11. Right.

01:09:22.000 Not a big fight for fucking Mark Hunt.

01:09:25.000 I'd love to see Mark Hunt versus Francis.

01:09:26.000 Which Russian guy?

01:09:27.000 Is it Tibura?

01:09:29.000 I forget.

01:09:30.000 There's so many goddamn Russians now. 1.00

01:09:31.000 He's right named from Russia.

01:09:33.000 Russians are taking over the world. 1.00

01:09:34.000 Yeah.

01:09:35.000 That Russian guy that stopped Stefan Struve.

01:09:37.000 That's pretty goddamn impressive.

01:09:39.000 Yeah.

01:09:39.000 And he had the Moana tattoo of Stingray on his back.

01:09:41.000 That's right.

01:09:42.000 The identical Moana tattoo that the grandma has.

01:09:44.000 Big fan.

01:09:44.000 Yeah, I guess.

01:09:45.000 You're welcome.

01:09:46.000 You're welcome.

01:09:47.000 Another rock movie.

01:09:49.000 Yeah, that guy's a badass.

01:09:51.000 He's got a sweet left high kick.

01:09:53.000 Doesn't do much for Hunt.

01:09:55.000 You know what I'm saying?

01:09:56.000 If you're Mark Hunt, you're like, alright, I'll do it.

01:09:57.000 At least I'm the main event in Australia.

01:09:59.000 But...

01:10:00.000 At what point do we have someone where we have a guy like the Golden Snitch in the UFC who's watching out for that stuff.

01:10:06.000 He's going, man, I saw Mark Hunt do an interview.

01:10:08.000 He has some real issues, man.

01:10:11.000 Someone to look out to take care of these guys.

01:10:13.000 Mark Hunt wants to go out on his shield.

01:10:14.000 I don't want to watch Mark Hunt in 10 years shitting his pants and drooling and doesn't remember his fight career.

01:10:20.000 I don't give a fuck if he beats that Russian guy in Australia. 0.98

01:10:23.000 He has nothing to prove.

01:10:27.000 Yeah.

01:10:27.000 What's it do for him?

01:10:29.000 Well, at a certain point, you have to have some sort of a regulation that stops people from hurting themselves when they've taken too much damage and they can't make good decisions anymore, right?

01:10:39.000 But then it becomes a personal freedom issue.

01:10:41.000 Free will.

01:10:42.000 Right?

01:10:42.000 Because there's a certain amount of damage you're going to take.

01:10:45.000 There's fights that probably shouldn't get made, like Francis Ngannou versus almost anybody.

01:10:53.000 Almost anybody's just agreeing to getting your fucking head scrambled.

01:10:57.000 I mean, I want to see what happens with Alistair.

01:10:59.000 I want to see if Alistair can survive.

01:11:02.000 It's a scary fight for Alistair.

01:11:03.000 Yeah, because Ngannou clips him once and Alistair could be in deep, deep trouble.

01:11:08.000 But also, Francis has never fought a striker, a high-level striker, let alone the best of all time in the heavyweight division.

01:11:13.000 But you don't have the same chin, so it's an interesting matchup.

01:11:16.000 He's fast, too, man.

01:11:17.000 He's scary fast.

01:11:18.000 Alistair?

01:11:18.000 Or Francis?

01:11:19.000 Francis.

01:11:19.000 Well, Alistair's clearly fast, too.

01:11:21.000 But Francis, all he has to do is touch that chin once.

01:11:24.000 True.

01:11:25.000 Francis puts people to sleep.

01:11:28.000 I gotta see him do it at a high level.

01:11:30.000 I do too.

01:11:30.000 Like a really high level before I jump on the train.

01:11:32.000 I think he has the capabilities, but...

01:11:34.000 Right.

01:11:35.000 When you watched it with Arlovsky, Arlovsky's already down the slope.

01:11:41.000 You know, he's already sliding way down.

01:11:42.000 He's been knocked out who knows how many times, right?

01:11:44.000 He's been down the slope, yeah.

01:11:45.000 He's been down the slope.

01:11:46.000 So that was impressive.

01:11:47.000 It was a good test.

01:11:49.000 Because Arlovsky still knocked out Travis Brown just a couple years ago.

01:11:52.000 He still can fuck you up.

01:11:54.000 In that barn burner, yeah.

01:11:54.000 Still can fuck you up.

01:11:55.000 You know, if you fuck up...

01:11:57.000 True.

01:11:58.000 I'm just saying that...

01:11:59.000 He fucked up Bigfoot, too.

01:12:00.000 Yeah.

01:12:01.000 That's true.

01:12:02.000 That was a while ago, though, Joe.

01:12:03.000 It was.

01:12:03.000 He went on that tear, and now it's over, but...

01:12:06.000 Yeah.

01:12:06.000 Well, Stipe kind of ended that.

01:12:07.000 Yeah, Stipe ended that.

01:12:08.000 But a guy like...

01:12:09.000 I think JDS would be a good test for him.

01:12:12.000 Alistair Overeem would be pretty good.

01:12:13.000 Mm-hmm.

01:12:14.000 Yeah, no, for sure.

01:12:16.000 Look, it's a great test.

01:12:17.000 Then I'm on board.

01:12:17.000 Because right now, to be honest, we need him.

01:12:20.000 We need a young killer, like a guy to bring some life into the heavyweight division.

01:12:25.000 He just has everything going as far as his ability to knock guys dead, his look.

01:12:30.000 I mean, he's just jacked.

01:12:32.000 He's so thick.

01:12:33.000 The markability's going to be tough until his English gets better.

01:12:35.000 Oh, uh-uh.

01:12:36.000 I don't think so.

01:12:37.000 Really?

01:12:37.000 Chet Congo's coming out of the corner.

01:12:38.000 What'd you say, Joe?

01:12:39.000 He starts murking people at heavyweight, and you get a highlight reel, the heavyweight champion of the world.

01:12:43.000 Stipe's murking people.

01:12:44.000 He's from Cleveland, and he's not a draw.

01:12:47.000 He's murking everybody.

01:12:49.000 I don't understand it.

01:12:49.000 Is it a marketing thing?

01:12:51.000 100%?

01:12:52.000 So they haven't done it right?

01:12:53.000 No, no.

01:12:53.000 I'm not blaming the UFC. The public has to jump on.

01:12:55.000 The public.

01:12:56.000 It's not the UFC. I mean, Stipe's doing his thing.

01:12:58.000 UFC's doing their thing with them.

01:13:00.000 But sometimes the stars don't align where you become this crossover pop culture icon, fighter.

01:13:06.000 Fickle-ass public.

01:13:07.000 They're like, ah, white guy, standard.

01:13:09.000 What?

01:13:09.000 He's a firefighter, though.

01:13:10.000 Standard.

01:13:11.000 But he's knocked out everyone.

01:13:12.000 Standard.

01:13:13.000 Oh, fuck you.

01:13:13.000 How is that standard?

01:13:15.000 It's just people want...

01:13:16.000 But he's real humble and well-spoken and he's not cocky.

01:13:21.000 So they don't...

01:13:22.000 We're drawn to negativity.

01:13:24.000 We're drawn to the Jon Jones and the Conor McGregor.

01:13:27.000 They want that kind of hot take on them. 1.00

01:13:29.000 Yeah, but Conor wasn't really negative.

01:13:30.000 He's not negative, but he talks a lot of shit.

01:13:32.000 He's going to give you a hot take. 0.98

01:13:33.000 Steve Bay's not giving you a hot take.

01:13:35.000 He's working his ass off, training hard to win the fight.

01:13:38.000 Isn't that crazy that...

01:13:39.000 Well, with Conor, the thing that's so sensational about him is he has both of those things.

01:13:44.000 He has fighting ability, and he also has this crazy personality that's magnetic.

01:13:48.000 Yeah, you're a unicorn.

01:13:49.000 Where Stipe just has the fighting ability and just, I don't know, I just love his work ethic.

01:13:53.000 I love the fact that he still has a fireman gig.

01:13:55.000 Me too.

01:13:55.000 I love it, man.

01:13:55.000 Knocking people dead.

01:13:57.000 Just your heavyweight champion of the world is not a draw, which is insane.

01:14:00.000 Yeah.

01:14:01.000 I know.

01:14:01.000 And even if Francis knocks out Alistair, knocks out Stipe, there's no way he's a draw.

01:14:09.000 Yeah.

01:14:10.000 There's just these, and I don't have the formula, trust me, the UFC would hit me up if I did.

01:14:14.000 There's this weird superstar soup, and you have a few ingredients, and you're missing.

01:14:18.000 We don't know what the others are, but guys hit it.

01:14:20.000 Yeah, you hit it almost by chance.

01:14:23.000 Yeah, they just come around once every now and then.

01:14:25.000 Conor wasn't like that early in his career.

01:14:27.000 He was just good.

01:14:28.000 Not at all.

01:14:28.000 He was just a great fighter.

01:14:30.000 He was just looking promising, and then all of a sudden he gets to the UFC, he feels the crowd, all the Irish people behind him, and he starts just talking shit and going off, and then people love it, and then he talks more shit, goes off more, then he starts predicting what round he's going to merc people in, 0.92

01:14:45.000 and then he starts pulling it off, and then he's like, who the fuck is that guy?

01:14:49.000 And everybody goes crazy.

01:14:50.000 It's hilarious.

01:14:51.000 And then think about John.

01:14:52.000 John didn't get really mainstream-y ESPN coverage Good Morning America until he went bad.

01:14:58.000 Then people are like, oh, I want to see that badass fight.

01:15:00.000 And he's been amazing for how long?

01:15:02.000 He had a press conference that he said what I've always said.

01:15:08.000 He said at the end of the day, he goes, about him, I've always said about him, he goes, at the end of the day, I'm a bad motherfucker.

01:15:14.000 I'm a wild motherfucker.

01:15:15.000 That's what I want.

01:15:15.000 And that's what I do.

01:15:17.000 Perfect.

01:15:17.000 At the end of the day, that's what he said.

01:15:18.000 At the end of the day, I'm a wild motherfucker.

01:15:20.000 I'm like, that's what I've been saying!

01:15:21.000 That's it, brother?

01:15:22.000 Yeah.

01:15:22.000 Run with that.

01:15:23.000 I told him that too when I talked to him about it.

01:15:25.000 He wanted to have a conversation before he did the podcast and he wanted to come clean.

01:15:30.000 I go, dude, you're going to make mistakes.

01:15:31.000 You're a wild motherfucker.

01:15:32.000 It's okay.

01:15:33.000 You don't get to be as good as you are without being a wild motherfucker.

01:15:37.000 You don't have to apologize for it there, John.

01:15:39.000 If he came out and went, listen, hell yeah, I'm going to make some mistakes and I'm probably going to make a lot more.

01:15:43.000 I'm a wild motherfucker.

01:15:44.000 I'm the baddest dude on the planet.

01:15:45.000 This is what you get.

01:15:46.000 Love it or hate it.

01:15:47.000 Drop the mic. 0.97

01:15:48.000 You just can't do things that hurt people, like the driving fucked up and smashing into that lady's car.

01:15:53.000 Take away the things that hurt people, and you're just out partying and having a good time, and you occasionally do blow.

01:15:58.000 Be that guy.

01:15:58.000 I don't give a fuck.

01:15:59.000 That's a great guy.

01:16:00.000 That's a fun guy.

01:16:01.000 You've got to make sure you avoid hurting other people.

01:16:06.000 This.

01:16:06.000 This steroid thing is the goddamn, that's the knife in the heart.

01:16:11.000 Like I said, you gotta look into the strata ball stuff with the baseball and all these guys who have all these problems.

01:16:17.000 And at GNC it's in all these supplements.

01:16:19.000 I saw that.

01:16:20.000 And again, I've been roasting John bad.

01:16:23.000 Because I'm upset.

01:16:24.000 I'm mad at him because he's my favorite fighter.

01:16:26.000 Right.

01:16:26.000 One of them.

01:16:26.000 So it is possible that he could have taken something as trace elements of this.

01:16:30.000 I've also seen that other things are recognized as that stuff in the test, but I have a hard time believing that USADA wouldn't know that.

01:16:39.000 I know, me too.

01:16:40.000 So I have a hard time, once they come clean with this, they come out with this, I don't think it's ever been proven once that they said that a person had tested positive for something and that that person had never actually taken that thing.

01:16:51.000 I've not seen that once.

01:16:53.000 Oh, no.

01:16:53.000 You saw it as so thorough.

01:16:54.000 Listen, man.

01:16:55.000 If you have the golden snitch on your trail, you're fucked.

01:16:59.000 He's like Sherlock Holmes of PEDs.

01:17:00.000 You are so fucked.

01:17:02.000 And again, just fucking dead calm about it.

01:17:05.000 Not judgmental.

01:17:06.000 Just the facts.

01:17:07.000 Going over the details of it.

01:17:09.000 This is what bothers me a little bit.

01:17:11.000 I'm going back and forth on John.

01:17:14.000 If my...

01:17:15.000 Career was in jeopardy.

01:17:17.000 I would be out there being like, listen, this is what fucking happened, man.

01:17:21.000 Hear me out.

01:17:22.000 I'm not going radio silent, sending these weird cryptic tweets doing this.

01:17:26.000 Even if my manager's like, dude, let's wait.

01:17:28.000 I'm doing a press conference like, listen to me right now, man.

01:17:31.000 Maybe I took this supplement.

01:17:32.000 I've never done steroids in my fucking life.

01:17:34.000 That is bullshit.

01:17:35.000 Yeah, but you can't say too much if it's going to go to some sort of an arbitration or a trial or I don't know what the process is.

01:17:42.000 You can if you didn't take it.

01:17:44.000 But here's the thing.

01:17:45.000 He's got to find out if there is a way that something happened.

01:17:50.000 A loophole?

01:17:50.000 Maybe it's you, okay?

01:17:52.000 Say you take something.

01:17:54.000 From GMC, and maybe you take a bunch of shit, and you thought everything was good, and then you get tested positive.

01:18:00.000 Before you say anything, I never took steroids, like, you have to find out what the fuck it is was in those things.

01:18:07.000 So you have to report those things, and then they have to check, and then they have to independently buy those things from a shelf from somewhere else to do confirmation.

01:18:14.000 Yeah.

01:18:15.000 And that's a process.

01:18:17.000 And it's one of the things that Jeff Nowitzki has said, you gotta let the process play out before you start accusing John.

01:18:23.000 So, there'll be a process.

01:18:26.000 I'm just saying, man...

01:18:27.000 It's not good.

01:18:28.000 A sample and B sample, it's not good.

01:18:30.000 It's not good.

01:18:31.000 I just think it could go a long ways with his fans and everything going on if he came out and was just like, let me tell you guys, you're going to hear this.

01:18:38.000 Because the public right now, we see Test A, Test B, both positive.

01:18:42.000 Oh, fuck, steroids.

01:18:43.000 He's dead to me.

01:18:45.000 But if he came out...

01:18:46.000 You need to look at the tweet where he said that he never took steroids.

01:18:49.000 On his kids.

01:18:50.000 And then his Heavenly Father.

01:18:51.000 Remember he capitalized Heavenly and Father.

01:18:53.000 So we're skeptical.

01:18:54.000 So fuck off.

01:18:55.000 Fuck off, bro.

01:18:55.000 That actually made me go, hmm, he was on steroids, huh?

01:18:58.000 Yeah, me too.

01:18:59.000 I was like, God damn it.

01:19:00.000 Alright, you're clear on steroids.

01:19:02.000 Yeah, when he went heavily farther, I was like, oh.

01:19:04.000 Alright, you're a bad guy.

01:19:05.000 He's a bad guy.

01:19:07.000 How about John does this and we're all like, oh, fucking the worst, greatest of all time, my ass, than Brian Cushion.

01:19:14.000 I don't even know how to do football.

01:19:15.000 Brian Cushion, captain of the Houston Texans.

01:19:18.000 He's been caught, I think, two or three times before.

01:19:21.000 Straight up test positive for PED, like straight up steroids.

01:19:24.000 And he's a monster, linebacker.

01:19:27.000 If he gets tested again, I think you're banned.

01:19:29.000 He's gonna miss like 10 games.

01:19:31.000 They docked $4 million of his paycheck.

01:19:34.000 The media doesn't make nothing about it.

01:19:37.000 This guy's a superstar.

01:19:38.000 Of course they're on steroids.

01:19:40.000 Everybody who's 360 pounds of solid muscle is on steroids.

01:19:44.000 But how crazy did we just give them a write-off?

01:19:46.000 They shouldn't be testing those guys.

01:19:48.000 It's ridiculous.

01:19:49.000 But he's playing a position, too, where he hits guys.

01:19:52.000 He's taking years off their life.

01:19:53.000 He's giving them brain trauma.

01:19:55.000 And he's rocking them jacked to the gills.

01:19:57.000 That's what people want to see.

01:19:58.000 If you want to see football, you want to see big giant guys colliding with each other.

01:20:02.000 You don't want to see natural athletes who are out there trying to fucking pound whey protein in the middle of the night.

01:20:07.000 Where do you want to see natural athletes?

01:20:08.000 That's a good question.

01:20:09.000 Not in the UFC? That's a good question.

01:20:10.000 Hate to tell ya.

01:20:11.000 I hear ya.

01:20:11.000 Most of those guys aren't.

01:20:12.000 Right.

01:20:13.000 I hear ya.

01:20:14.000 But there's weight classes in the UFC, and that's where it gets different.

01:20:16.000 Because you're talking about guys trying to get as big and as fast, as powerful as they can.

01:20:20.000 And we've all known forever, you ask the average person, do football players take PEDs?

01:20:24.000 They'd be like, of course they do.

01:20:26.000 Of course they do.

01:20:27.000 You're looking at these mountains.

01:20:29.000 Well, most people assume UFC fighters on PDs.

01:20:31.000 Like, I've had some talks.

01:20:32.000 And what did we say?

01:20:34.000 I know.

01:20:34.000 I mean, there's a giant percentage.

01:20:36.000 But there's a different standard.

01:20:38.000 Way less are now, but I think for the longest time.

01:20:42.000 42 supplements, including some that are available at GNC, can trigger a positive test for Toronto Ball.

01:20:49.000 Yeah, this is that Fox Sports article.

01:20:50.000 Baseball officials said the Cubs again were reminded this week that players should use only supplements certified by NSF International, an independent organization, to test and approve products.

01:21:03.000 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

01:21:04.000 So there's a lot of shit.

01:21:05.000 Look, the union, however, is concerned about the run of suspension of Terranobol and continues to seek evidence that might shed light on why some players are testing positive because so many guys are testing positive for it.

01:21:15.000 Well, isn't this a short-acting drug, though, that's out of your system fairly quickly?

01:21:19.000 I think that was the thing about this stuff.

01:21:22.000 Or is that not true?

01:21:24.000 There's even debate on that, though, Joe.

01:21:26.000 Yeah, why did I see something that said it had a 60-day window?

01:21:30.000 I've seen months, I've seen weeks, I've seen days, I've seen hours.

01:21:34.000 Again, we don't fucking know, do we?

01:21:35.000 For when it's been explained to me, the stuff that gets out of your system the quickest is those little edible testosterone things.

01:21:41.000 Like the gummies and stuff.

01:21:42.000 Yeah, but those are just a few hours.

01:21:44.000 And a few hours are out of your system.

01:21:46.000 The other thing, just like we're doing now with baseball, like Barry Bonds, Mark McGuire, Sammy Sosa, at the time we're like, oh my god, PEDs, home runs, that doesn't count.

01:21:55.000 Years go by, we're like, those guys are still pretty fucking good.

01:21:58.000 Even the pitchers were sauced up.

01:22:00.000 I think that could happen with John, too.

01:22:02.000 Like, five, ten years now, he's the greatest of all time still.

01:22:05.000 Yeah, but no, because Daniel Cormier wasn't sauced up.

01:22:08.000 Daniel Cormier was totally on the natch.

01:22:10.000 Uh-huh.

01:22:11.000 You don't believe that?

01:22:12.000 I don't know.

01:22:13.000 I assume he is.

01:22:14.000 No, I assume he is.

01:22:16.000 I have no idea.

01:22:17.000 I have no reason not to believe.

01:22:20.000 I don't know anything in this world anymore when it comes to PDs.

01:22:24.000 Well, you know, you gotta think, man.

01:22:26.000 Your health's on the line.

01:22:28.000 Your future's on the line.

01:22:29.000 Your career's on the line.

01:22:30.000 You've been out of the game for...

01:22:33.000 Essentially, two and a half years plus.

01:22:36.000 One fight in between there.

01:22:37.000 The OSP fight.

01:22:38.000 But he's been out of cage for a long time.

01:22:41.000 You gotta fight the best in the world, DC. You gotta fight the best in the world.

01:22:43.000 Yeah, that's me, dog.

01:22:45.000 You got all this pressure on you.

01:22:50.000 And you just go, just a little bit.

01:22:51.000 Just get a little bit.

01:22:53.000 A little bit of help.

01:22:54.000 I don't know if you need that help if you're John.

01:22:56.000 Might not.

01:22:57.000 Might not need it.

01:22:58.000 Maybe go to the club, do a couple lines of coke.

01:23:00.000 That's his help.

01:23:01.000 Maybe it's one of those things where he's always used it.

01:23:04.000 Got away with it.

01:23:05.000 Now he didn't.

01:23:07.000 Maybe he took a supplement that had it in it.

01:23:10.000 I mean, we really don't know.

01:23:11.000 It's one of the things that Nowitzki stressed that I really believe.

01:23:14.000 You've got to kind of, before casting 100% judgment on him, you've got to let it play out.

01:23:19.000 But this is the thing, when you say let it play out, again, I know I'm playing both sides of the field here, but when you say let it play out, we know he has a history of fucking up.

01:23:27.000 So you're going to hang him before it's actually come out, because we go, no, he's consistently good at beating people up and fucking up.

01:23:34.000 And here's another fuck up.

01:23:36.000 Yeah, that's a good way of looking at it.

01:23:37.000 Yeah.

01:23:38.000 That's why everyone's like, nope, he's done to me.

01:23:40.000 Well, it's depressing to us, right, as fans, because he's so fucking good.

01:23:45.000 And to know that he's going to be out possibly for four years now, that shit's just devastating to me.

01:23:52.000 We need him.

01:23:53.000 I know people go, no, we fucking need him.

01:23:56.000 He was going to fight Stipe for the heavyweight title, you fucks!

01:23:58.000 Stipe didn't even know about that.

01:24:00.000 Well, now you know.

01:24:01.000 Ah!

01:24:02.000 And that would have been a tough fight for Stipe.

01:24:05.000 And then he was going to fight Brock Lesnar.

01:24:07.000 Gustvin, Ozdemir, DC. There's so much out there.

01:24:10.000 Dude, John Jones versus Stipe for the heavyweight title would be...

01:24:15.000 Might as well talk about fucking dragons and Jon Snow.

01:24:19.000 It's because neither one of them is happening.

01:24:20.000 It's interesting, right?

01:24:21.000 It's like what your theory about the Fertittas pumping it up with Reebok and with USADA and then just to sell.

01:24:29.000 That's science, son.

01:24:30.000 What do you mean theory?

01:24:31.000 But it's a very good theory that I haven't heard before.

01:24:33.000 Oh, word.

01:24:33.000 I've never heard it.

01:24:34.000 Is your theory entirely your idea?

01:24:37.000 I mean, it's evidence.

01:24:40.000 It's just...

01:24:40.000 Right, but...

01:24:41.000 The evidence was always there.

01:24:43.000 Yeah, always.

01:24:44.000 You just put two and two together, what they're doing.

01:24:46.000 That's genius.

01:24:47.000 I mean, if they really played at that 3D chess, that's fucking genius.

01:24:51.000 100% that's what they're doing.

01:24:53.000 But it really is not...

01:24:54.000 They're so smart, man.

01:24:54.000 If you just bought it, and you were WME, you'd probably be like...

01:25:00.000 Infertita is there.

01:25:01.000 This...

01:25:04.000 It's the USADA thing.

01:25:05.000 100%.

01:25:06.000 What are we doing with this?

01:25:07.000 Yeah.

01:25:08.000 Yeah.

01:25:08.000 You're going, hold on.

01:25:10.000 How long is it going?

01:25:11.000 I don't know what the deal is with USADA, because USADA is an employee of the UFC. Let's find out.

01:25:16.000 We realize that, right?

01:25:17.000 Let's find out how long the deal is with the UFC and USADA. Let's take a guess.

01:25:22.000 10 years?

01:25:23.000 I think it's 10 years?

01:25:24.000 You can't do 10 years?

01:25:25.000 How dare you?

01:25:28.000 Golden Snitch can be buying 14 houses if it's 10 years.

01:25:30.000 But what happens if they abandon it and all of a sudden everybody just comes, like Eric Silva comes back, jacked.

01:25:36.000 Ratings go...

01:25:36.000 Everybody, Alistair, jacked.

01:25:38.000 Alistair goes back to being Uber-eam.

01:25:40.000 All he has to do is pass the one at the weigh-ins.

01:25:42.000 That's it.

01:25:43.000 We're going Sizzler.

01:25:45.000 They better pray to God the Golden Snitch contract runs out in the next two years. 0.82

01:25:49.000 You bring in that Russian cat from Icarus?

01:25:51.000 You bring in it.

01:25:52.000 Icarus, whatever it is.

01:25:53.000 You bring in everybody and anybody.

01:25:55.000 All the Russians. 1.00

01:25:55.000 They're the best at it. 1.00

01:25:56.000 All of them.

01:25:57.000 Bring them in.

01:25:58.000 This guy had this dude on a protocol.

01:25:59.000 I fell asleep while I was watching.

01:26:00.000 I only watched the first 15 minutes.

01:26:02.000 Then I went to bed.

01:26:03.000 I'm going to watch the rest of it tonight.

01:26:04.000 I've heard about it.

01:26:04.000 But he was...

01:26:06.000 Banging like five different things in his ass.

01:26:08.000 These like amber liquids.

01:26:10.000 It looked like Jack Daniels.

01:26:11.000 Was the guy Jack?

01:26:12.000 No, he's a cyclist.

01:26:14.000 He was a very thin, slim guy.

01:26:16.000 But he just started doing this.

01:26:18.000 He just started doing this while he was listening to this guy.

01:26:20.000 And I guess the idea is that they're going to test him and they're going to give him PEDs forever and he's going to test clean.

01:26:25.000 Oh, that's sick!

01:26:25.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:26:26.000 I need to see the whole thing.

01:26:27.000 Like I said, like 15-20 minutes into it, I had to shut it off.

01:26:29.000 Yeah, if you're a WME, you're looking at that going, when's that contract up?

01:26:34.000 When's the Reebok deal?

01:26:35.000 You're literally going, you're going to tear it down and go, let us do it like you guys got it to this point.

01:26:40.000 Right.

01:26:41.000 Like, this isn't working for us now.

01:26:42.000 Yeah, those are two ideas that look good.

01:26:45.000 To sell to another company and make it legit.

01:26:47.000 But the thing is, like, if you can get a better deal, like, right, you have a deal with Reebok, goes for so long, and then if it's profitable for Reebok, then Adidas comes in and goes, hey, we like what you're doing here.

01:26:57.000 Let's switch it up.

01:26:59.000 Let's go Adidas.

01:27:00.000 And then you have a bidding war between Adidas and Reebok, and then maybe Nike thinks about it, too.

01:27:05.000 And, you know, if you can prove that you're cleaning the sport up, right, with USADA, that's a very smart move to get a big company to invest in the sport.

01:27:12.000 That's why you do it.

01:27:13.000 But the big company has to see some sort of a payback.

01:27:15.000 That's why people were pissed off because they were like, well, the sponsorship doesn't match what we were getting before.

01:27:21.000 And, you know, I know you had a real issue with that.

01:27:23.000 It was a big, like, $100,000 plus a fight.

01:27:26.000 Yeah, that was the biggest issue.

01:27:28.000 I like the uniform system and make it look like a professional sport.

01:27:32.000 But if you're going to bring in a major sponsor like that and then cut down guys' pays, then you're fucking the product.

01:27:37.000 You're fucking the fighters.

01:27:38.000 Yeah.

01:27:53.000 For who?

01:27:57.000 I forget who.

01:27:58.000 He said they have some new boxing shoes and some shorts you want to send me.

01:28:02.000 I'm like, alright, cool, man.

01:28:02.000 I would like Ioana's fight kit so I could spell her name.

01:28:05.000 I want mine.

01:28:07.000 How much, if I gave you 10 million dollars, do you think you could spell Ioana Jacek's last name?

01:28:12.000 Nope.

01:28:13.000 Nope.

01:28:14.000 Nope.

01:28:14.000 Not even close.

01:28:15.000 I bet she can't even spell it.

01:28:17.000 Get her together.

01:28:18.000 She's like, who it is this?

01:28:19.000 What is this?

01:28:20.000 This is Z or S. You found something, Jamie?

01:28:22.000 No, I don't see anything.

01:28:22.000 I just see that it's just a program they started together.

01:28:26.000 So they can cancel at any time, maybe?

01:28:27.000 I would imagine they probably could.

01:28:28.000 They committed money.

01:28:29.000 No, they have a contract.

01:28:30.000 It doesn't say that they have a long...

01:28:31.000 Is this USADA or Reebok?

01:28:33.000 The only thing I found is that the UFC has committed millions of dollars to in and out of competition testing.

01:28:39.000 For sure.

01:28:39.000 If they're being smart, though, for the UFC, to bring in a big sponsor like Reebok, that's a good way to ensure that you've got a clean sport that you represent.

01:28:47.000 You want to represent a clean sport.

01:28:49.000 That's why that fighter the other night when Gavin Tucker fought...

01:28:55.000 God damn it.

01:28:56.000 I'm sure of Tucker because he's, you know, he's the guy who took the beat down, right?

01:28:59.000 Yes.

01:29:00.000 With that ref.

01:29:01.000 Right, that ref that stopped the fight. 1.00

01:29:03.000 Mitch?

01:29:04.000 Is this the M? No.

01:29:06.000 He looked great though.

01:29:07.000 Rick Glenn.

01:29:08.000 Rick the Gladiator Glenn.

01:29:09.000 Yes, yes.

01:29:10.000 Rick Glenn.

01:29:10.000 Two first names.

01:29:11.000 Fantastic mustache.

01:29:11.000 Rick Glenn.

01:29:12.000 Two first names.

01:29:13.000 Rick Glenn beat the shit out of him.

01:29:14.000 Beat the brakes out of him.

01:29:15.000 Like way too much.

01:29:16.000 It was like the fight should have been stopped like minutes before.

01:29:19.000 Horrible.

01:29:19.000 Yeah, it was not good.

01:29:21.000 Like when you see that, like if I was Reebok, I'd be like, hey, this guy can't do, we can't sponsor a fight with this guy as a ref ever again.

01:29:28.000 Reebok doesn't know the sport that well to do that.

01:29:31.000 Whatever.

01:29:32.000 They know it now.

01:29:34.000 You know what I'd do if I was at the UFC, if I'm WME? I get rid of the snitch.

01:29:40.000 I don't say anything.

01:29:41.000 But I don't say anything.

01:29:43.000 I let people assume.

01:29:44.000 I let everyone assume.

01:29:46.000 I'm sure there's a non-disclosure on that.

01:29:48.000 You don't think the golden snitch is going to go on the Ariel Helwani show the moment he gets canned?

01:29:54.000 Maybe you pay him a fat sum and just be like, okay, just go away.

01:29:58.000 But let's not say anything we're not doing on the street.

01:30:00.000 They told me it was Brock Lesnar's urine.

01:30:02.000 It looked like Gatorade.

01:30:05.000 It looked like fucking gravy.

01:30:07.000 Yeah, I don't...

01:30:08.000 That's what I would do.

01:30:09.000 I would just take him out of the equation, not say anything to the public, and then all of a sudden you have all the monsters back.

01:30:15.000 That's so stupid.

01:30:17.000 People are going to know.

01:30:18.000 How are they going to know?

01:30:19.000 We all assume.

01:30:21.000 They're gonna know.

01:30:22.000 They're gonna find out.

01:30:23.000 People are fans.

01:30:24.000 The general public won't find out.

01:30:25.000 Everybody's gonna find out.

01:30:26.000 No.

01:30:27.000 You don't think so?

01:30:28.000 No.

01:30:28.000 That's so stupid.

01:30:29.000 I don't think so.

01:30:30.000 You think it wouldn't get out if USADA left?

01:30:32.000 If the UFC was like, what about the testing?

01:30:35.000 No, no.

01:30:36.000 We're still doing the testing.

01:30:37.000 What testing did they do before?

01:30:39.000 There were still tests, right?

01:30:40.000 Nevada State Athletic Commission tests, which would test after the weigh-in.

01:30:45.000 After the fight, depending on the main event.

01:30:47.000 You saw it as just the surprise testing whenever.

01:30:50.000 You saw it as 365 days a year.

01:30:52.000 And they also are way more thorough.

01:30:54.000 Their tests are very, very thorough.

01:30:55.000 They do blood.

01:30:57.000 The other one only does urine.

01:30:59.000 Victor Conte, the guy who got busted in the Balco scandal when he was on the podcast, what he said to me, he was like, if you fail one of those post-weigh-in tests, that's an intelligence test.

01:31:10.000 You're just a dummy.

01:31:12.000 He's like, anybody who knows what they're doing can pass those tests.

01:31:16.000 If you have a guy like him, you're dealing with these high-level guys, that's an easy test.

01:31:21.000 USADA though, there's no...

01:31:22.000 USADA's not...

01:31:23.000 They're keeping your piss and your blood for like seven years.

01:31:28.000 They're freezing that shit.

01:31:30.000 They're keeping it for seven years, man.

01:31:33.000 It's too much.

01:31:33.000 They're gonna test it in seven years and strip people to the title.

01:31:37.000 You know, the Olympics has already done that.

01:31:39.000 Yeah, I know.

01:31:39.000 They busted Russians retroactively.

01:31:41.000 They busted two gold medalists.

01:31:43.000 I want to say, like, 2008?

01:31:45.000 Two gold medalists from 2008. They're like, yeah.

01:31:48.000 You imagine getting that call?

01:31:49.000 Who the fuck was that?

01:31:50.000 The Olympic Committee from fucking 2008 just stripped our gold medals.

01:31:53.000 Well, you know, they came real close to banning Russia from competing in Rio.

01:31:59.000 Didn't they ban some of their athletes? 0.85

01:32:01.000 Or was that China?

01:32:02.000 Did they ban, like, China's gymnastics team?

01:32:05.000 Do you have to give that back?

01:32:06.000 The medal?

01:32:07.000 Is someone going to come fucking take it from you?

01:32:09.000 Hell yeah.

01:32:09.000 Go to Siberia.

01:32:10.000 Who's going to take it?

01:32:11.000 That dude's out there.

01:32:11.000 Just hiding your ass.

01:32:12.000 Killing Pike with a knife.

01:32:14.000 They took like Reggie Bush.

01:32:16.000 Remember that?

01:32:17.000 They took his Heisman.

01:32:17.000 You can't find it anymore.

01:32:19.000 And they took their trophies.

01:32:20.000 They took his Heisman for what?

01:32:22.000 For what reason?

01:32:23.000 Because that year, he received benefits, like he took money from boosters.

01:32:27.000 Oh, good lord.

01:32:28.000 And they're like, can I see that trophy, bitch? 1.00

01:32:30.000 They gave him money?

01:32:32.000 They took his Heisman?

01:32:33.000 They gave his parents a house or something like that.

01:32:35.000 So they investigated and took all the shit.

01:32:37.000 And they voided all USC's wins that year.

01:32:41.000 All USC's wins?

01:32:43.000 Holy shit, because he violated the agreement?

01:32:45.000 Him and the coach, and they had a bunch of fuck-ups with NCAA. That is so bizarre.

01:32:52.000 I know.

01:32:53.000 You just have to act like it never happened.

01:32:54.000 That's so crazy.

01:32:55.000 How is that possible?

01:32:56.000 How can you...

01:32:58.000 All the wins?

01:32:59.000 Everything.

01:33:00.000 None of it counts.

01:33:01.000 It's out of the record books.

01:33:04.000 I know, but the money was transpired.

01:33:06.000 People watched it on TV. You know what I mean?

01:33:08.000 The university made their money.

01:33:10.000 Well, it's like Jon Jones and Daniel Cormier.

01:33:12.000 You could call that a no contest all you want.

01:33:14.000 We saw Jon Jones beat Daniel to sleep.

01:33:17.000 We saw it.

01:33:18.000 We saw the high kick.

01:33:18.000 UFC made their money.

01:33:19.000 UFC made their money off that.

01:33:20.000 Yeah, but they're not thinking that way.

01:33:22.000 What they're thinking is it's a violation of the rules in terms of someone competing on a performance-enhancing drug.

01:33:30.000 They set up the rules.

01:33:31.000 The guy violated it, so they stripped his title as they're supposed to, and they reinstated it to DC. I'll do one better.

01:33:36.000 How about UFC 200 with Brock Lesnar?

01:33:40.000 Think about that.

01:33:41.000 And then, because you get all the bias for Brock Lesnar, then you realize he tests hot afterwards.

01:33:46.000 He's like, fuck, I'm WWE. Of course I was.

01:33:48.000 You're just like, ah, goddamn, bro.

01:33:50.000 He rides off in the sunset.

01:33:51.000 Well, a little.

01:33:52.000 You know, Brock Lesnar independently tested himself a shit ton of times leading up to that.

01:33:58.000 Well, listen.

01:33:58.000 Listen to me.

01:33:59.000 Listen to me.

01:34:00.000 Don't get crazy.

01:34:01.000 Don't get crazy.

01:34:02.000 When you independently test yourself, it's because you want to make sure that you're showing up clean.

01:34:06.000 It's not because you think you're clean, you want to show the world.

01:34:09.000 It's because you want to make sure, like, hey, is this showing up?

01:34:13.000 For sure.

01:34:14.000 What's going on?

01:34:14.000 We okay here?

01:34:15.000 Let's test out.

01:34:16.000 Like, is this really working, this chemistry?

01:34:18.000 There were multiple independent tests that he did, which you wouldn't have to do if you weren't taking anything.

01:34:23.000 He's trying to get whatever it is out of his system, trying to get his body up to baseline.

01:34:28.000 For sure.

01:34:28.000 I mean, when you watched him in the WWE and he's 300 plus pounds, fucking jacked!

01:34:34.000 He looks the same.

01:34:35.000 He's a giant guy, you know, and he's 39 or something like that.

01:34:41.000 That was a dirty one.

01:34:43.000 That was the most dirtiest one of all time.

01:34:44.000 Well, that's another Mark Hunt beating.

01:34:45.000 I know.

01:34:46.000 And now he slurged speech.

01:34:47.000 Yeah.

01:34:48.000 Alistair Overeem.

01:34:49.000 Ooh, that was the worst one.

01:34:50.000 That knee he took to the face.

01:34:52.000 Oh, I flatlined him.

01:34:53.000 Ooh.

01:34:54.000 Straight up flatlined.

01:34:55.000 Right in front of us, man.

01:34:56.000 He was doing a toe curl.

01:34:58.000 You know when they get KO'd and they get that toe curl going on?

01:35:00.000 They sure do.

01:35:01.000 They do like the shocker with their feet.

01:35:03.000 That toe curl is hard to watch because you know that that's the whole body going... 1.00

01:35:09.000 It's weird people enjoy seeing that.

01:35:10.000 They don't enjoy seeing that.

01:35:12.000 They enjoy seeing the kick landing because it's so difficult and you know the consequences are so grave.

01:35:17.000 It's like...

01:35:18.000 Like the way we're made up, you almost want to flinch when you see that someone's brain shuts off like that.

01:35:26.000 You should be genetically, you go, oh my god, you know? 0.52

01:35:30.000 You know, I just don't think the people that suffer the most start, they don't come out about it.

01:35:37.000 They just kind of go away.

01:35:39.000 What do you mean?

01:35:39.000 Right?

01:35:39.000 Like guys like Don Frye.

01:35:42.000 You don't see Don Frye all the time being interviewed on TV. You don't think about his fight with Takayama when they both stood in front of each other and blasted each other in the face over and over and over again.

01:35:51.000 That's the older generation.

01:35:52.000 It's not in their nature to do that.

01:35:53.000 They're not very good on camera and stuff like that.

01:35:56.000 I think as you go on, you're going to see guys coming out, though.

01:35:59.000 Maybe.

01:36:00.000 I hope.

01:36:01.000 But just because people don't see them, they fade away.

01:36:04.000 Oh, I see what you're saying.

01:36:05.000 You're not in the spotlight.

01:36:06.000 Yeah, they're not in the spotlight, so people don't think about that.

01:36:08.000 When you think of fighting, you think of watching Tyron Woodley right now in his prime.

01:36:13.000 Yeah.

01:36:14.000 He's doing damage.

01:36:15.000 He's had some good fights, but he's okay.

01:36:17.000 He's fine.

01:36:18.000 You think about his knockout loss to Nate Marquardt in Strikeforce.

01:36:24.000 That's the only real bad loss that he has.

01:36:26.000 The other losses...

01:36:27.000 It just doesn't seem like he's in a bad place.

01:36:31.000 But then you don't see guys that were in the UFC 15, 20 years ago that took crazy...

01:36:39.000 Like Gary Goodridge.

01:36:40.000 Big Daddy Goodridge, who went over to K-1.

01:36:43.000 And he's got crazy CTE now.

01:36:45.000 Horrible.

01:36:46.000 He talks about it, right?

01:36:47.000 He's trying to.

01:36:47.000 Yeah, he talks about it really openly, and he's got a great Twitter to follow.

01:36:52.000 Have you ever had him on here?

01:36:53.000 No.

01:36:53.000 Would you?

01:36:54.000 For sure, yeah.

01:36:55.000 To talk about that?

01:36:56.000 I mean, I'm sure he'd want to talk about that.

01:36:58.000 He'd want people to know, you know?

01:37:01.000 I just...

01:37:03.000 Obviously, if you're going to fight, brain trauma is one of the...

01:37:07.000 It's one of the consequences.

01:37:09.000 That's what we do.

01:37:11.000 Obviously.

01:37:12.000 So if he were to come on and be like, hey, I have brain trauma with CT, I don't feel like most people are like, oh, it's terrible, I'm not watching anymore.

01:37:19.000 Well, you feel bad, like, you know, you see someone slurring their words.

01:37:21.000 You ever see Joe Frazier before he died?

01:37:22.000 Yeah.

01:37:23.000 He was on the Opie and Anthony show once, and I remember listening, and I was like, whoa, this is hard to listen to, man.

01:37:28.000 It's just like...

01:37:30.000 There's some guys like that in the UFC. Yeah.

01:37:32.000 Yeah.

01:37:33.000 Yes.

01:37:33.000 I won't mention names.

01:37:34.000 There's some guys who I'll have conversations with and I'm like, oh my god, man.

01:37:37.000 You don't see it?

01:37:38.000 Yeah.

01:37:39.000 Look, nobody rides for free.

01:37:41.000 You get hit enough.

01:37:43.000 The weird thing is the number's different for everybody.

01:37:46.000 The number for one guy, like Mark Hunt, it took years and years and years and years and years and years for his chin to start to fail him.

01:37:53.000 You think about the K-1 fights he had, all the pride fights he had.

01:38:02.000 You know, I think he fought in Dream as well.

01:38:05.000 When did Melvin Manhoff knock him out?

01:38:07.000 Was that in Dream?

01:38:08.000 Uh, no.

01:38:10.000 That's Pride.

01:38:10.000 No?

01:38:10.000 It was Pride?

01:38:12.000 It's just all the K1 bouts, man.

01:38:14.000 I mean, he was a K1 Grand Prix champion.

01:38:16.000 That was actually K1, yeah.

01:38:17.000 I mean, he fought some fucking war.

01:38:19.000 Was it a K1 MMA fight?

01:38:20.000 Yeah, it was K1. Yeah.

01:38:22.000 There's only so many of those fights you could have.

01:38:25.000 It is weird how certain guys get their capabilities to take punches so much longer than other guys.

01:38:32.000 We don't know what it is.

01:38:34.000 I think it's a structure thing.

01:38:35.000 The way they're built.

01:38:36.000 I think the way you're built.

01:38:37.000 Mark Hunt is built like a tank.

01:38:39.000 He's 5'10", 265. He's just a tank.

01:38:42.000 The other problem is width, size of his head, his body, his denseness.

01:38:46.000 When you see his shins, like when Mark is standing in front, his knees are giant. 0.99

01:38:49.000 His knees are like this big.

01:38:51.000 Everything's big.

01:38:51.000 His shins are huge.

01:38:52.000 He's like a thick-boned guy.

01:38:54.000 Well, the other issue is, is UFC's, especially as, I should say mixed martial arts, hate when everyone calls mixed martial arts UFC, but mixed martial arts is so new in the grand scheme of things compared to other sports.

01:39:05.000 Right.

01:39:05.000 We don't know the best way to train to stay healthy, to not get brain trouble.

01:39:09.000 We have not, people are trying to figure out, there's doctors, it just hasn't been around long enough.

01:39:13.000 Like in football, and the CFL just passed this, they're not allowed to put pads on in practice anymore.

01:39:18.000 They cannot hit in practice anymore.

01:39:19.000 That is a rule.

01:39:20.000 Smart.

01:39:21.000 And now the NFL's going, ah, we're going to look into that.

01:39:23.000 Now the NFL only has, I think, 14 days of pad work where they're in pads during the season, but they want to eliminate that.

01:39:30.000 But that sport's been around for a grip.

01:39:32.000 The best saving grace for the sport would be, or the best hope for the sport would be medical science.

01:39:40.000 Medical science comes along with some sort of stem cell regeneration thing that allows your brain to come back to 100%, which is totally possible.

01:39:48.000 They just have to crack the code.

01:39:49.000 You just think about what they can do with other parts of your body, the way they can repair things.

01:39:53.000 The brain is far more complicated than anything we have to deal with, but if you could somehow or another reignite the body's ability to heal itself, and in fact, They have a new chip that they're working on now where they install it in a person's body,

01:40:10.000 and it reprograms your genes, and they think it can repair brain trauma, injuries, tissue damage, and even the effects of aging.

01:40:19.000 Oh, my God.

01:40:20.000 Oh, my God.

01:40:21.000 Yeah, it's a chip you put into your body, and it reprograms your genes.

01:40:25.000 And I think it's probably at some very embryonic stage of development.

01:40:29.000 It's going to be like $1 trillion, I know.

01:40:31.000 Who knows?

01:40:31.000 But they're probably trying to juice up excitement for it by making it this thing people talk about.

01:40:37.000 Can you imagine?

01:40:37.000 I can imagine.

01:40:38.000 Look, dude, you know the story with my shoulder.

01:40:41.000 Yeah, I know.

01:40:42.000 My shoulder was fucked.

01:40:43.000 I was ready to get shoulder surgery.

01:40:44.000 It was hurting all the time.

01:40:45.000 It doesn't hurt at all.

01:40:47.000 Brain's a different animal, though.

01:40:48.000 It is.

01:40:49.000 You're right.

01:40:49.000 It is.

01:40:50.000 It's way more complicated.

01:40:52.000 Yeah, you listen to the scientists.

01:40:53.000 They go, you need a new heart.

01:40:54.000 We can make that.

01:40:55.000 You need lungs, muscle, bones.

01:40:57.000 We can make all that.

01:40:58.000 Can't help your brain right now.

01:41:00.000 Now, stop and think about where we were 50 years ago.

01:41:03.000 50 years ago, none of those things were possible.

01:41:05.000 So all these ideas that are commonplace today were just...

01:41:09.000 It's science fiction 50 years ago.

01:41:11.000 50 years from now, they might be able to use this chip.

01:41:14.000 Have you found that thing?

01:41:15.000 That chip?

01:41:16.000 The one I found isn't even new.

01:41:17.000 It's from three years ago, but it's made by DARPA. No, that's not what it is.

01:41:21.000 It's a new chip installed under skin that reprograms DNA and can heal injuries.

01:41:29.000 Forget about brain injury.

01:41:30.000 Just look at that.

01:41:32.000 New chip.

01:41:33.000 I think it can replicate and restore.

01:41:37.000 The idea behind it is it can program the genes to replicate and restore any sort of injury.

01:41:43.000 Did you read this on the forum or is this some legit shit?

01:41:45.000 No, I think it was livescience.com.

01:41:47.000 It's one of those science websites that I go to.

01:41:51.000 You know what's a bitch about that is by the time that's out, you and I would probably be dead. 0.93

01:41:54.000 No, that's not true.

01:41:55.000 It might be out real soon.

01:41:56.000 Breakthrough device heals organs with a single touch.

01:41:59.000 Device instantly delivers new DNA or RNA into living skin cells to change their function.

01:42:05.000 This is it.

01:42:06.000 They've developed a device that will switch cell function to rescue failing body functions with a single touch.

01:42:12.000 The technology known as tissue nanotransfection...

01:42:17.000 Injects genetic code into the skin cells, turning those skin cells into other types of cells required for treating disease conditions.

01:42:25.000 Goddamn!

01:42:26.000 Boom! 0.99

01:42:26.000 Welcome to the future, motherfucker. 0.99

01:42:28.000 CTE out the window.

01:42:29.000 Football, no helmets, don't be a pussy. 1.00

01:42:32.000 Ah!

01:42:32.000 We'll stitch you back up.

01:42:34.000 They have a bunch of dudes with boxes of these chips sitting by, and you're down, your head's mashed in like that fucking guy, the mountain from Game of Thrones, crushed.

01:42:44.000 And they just stick that shit on your eyeballs, just pop right back into place, like, whoa, that guy's strong.

01:42:51.000 Then we start, you know what happens then?

01:42:53.000 Sword fights.

01:42:54.000 Yes!

01:42:55.000 Once they can just grab ahold of you real quick and bring you back to life.

01:42:59.000 It's gonna be a bitch if he gets stabbed, even if he can recover. 1.00

01:43:02.000 Sword fights would be like, you're not allowed to cut their head off.

01:43:05.000 Can't fix that.

01:43:06.000 Can't fix that.

01:43:07.000 Don't cut their fucking heads off.

01:43:08.000 It's like elbows to the back of the head when you got the back mount.

01:43:10.000 You can't do those.

01:43:11.000 They're too effective.

01:43:12.000 Don't cut their heads off.

01:43:12.000 Within one week, active blood vessels appeared in the injured leg, and by the second week, the leg was saved.

01:43:19.000 Holy shit.

01:43:19.000 Researchers studied mice and pigs in these experiments.

01:43:22.000 In the study, researchers were able to reprogram skin cells to become vascular cells in badly injured legs that lack blood flow.

01:43:29.000 So, amazing probably for people with diabetes, amazing for people that are suffering from all sorts of circulatory conditions.

01:43:38.000 Bro, it takes less than a second and is non-invasive.

01:43:42.000 Come on, son.

01:43:43.000 Welcome to the new world.

01:43:45.000 It's like that Nas song.

01:43:46.000 The chip doesn't even stay in your body.

01:43:47.000 I think it says they can take it out.

01:43:49.000 Holy fuck!

01:43:49.000 We're living in the future, bitch!

01:43:51.000 What are we talking about?

01:43:51.000 We're fixing shit!

01:43:52.000 Why isn't this bigger news?

01:43:53.000 Why isn't this on CNN and all that shit?

01:43:55.000 That's a good question.

01:43:55.000 Fake news.

01:43:56.000 Fake news.

01:43:56.000 Powerful fake news.

01:43:57.000 They're too busy talking about Trump.

01:43:58.000 Earth's flat.

01:43:59.000 They're talking about whether or not Trump is a racist and whether or not that girl should get fired.

01:44:03.000 Instead of...

01:44:04.000 That is nuts!

01:44:05.000 Ooh, drama!

01:44:05.000 Ooh, excitement!

01:44:07.000 Ooh, drama!

01:44:08.000 How's that not exciting as shit?

01:44:10.000 It's exciting as shit.

01:44:11.000 I'm going to go bash my brains in.

01:44:13.000 We're in the new world, man, and this is just one step, right?

01:44:16.000 What is this going to be like 20 years?

01:44:17.000 We didn't see this coming.

01:44:18.000 What's it going to be like 20 years from now?

01:44:20.000 We don't know who's in Austria right now in some fucking laboratory with white gloves on.

01:44:24.000 With a huge brain.

01:44:24.000 Putting their hand into some crazy machine.

01:44:26.000 There's a Petri dish and they got all these lasers that are zapping this thing. 0.98

01:44:30.000 Who knows what the fuck they're doing right now?

01:44:32.000 Well, what's a bummer?

01:44:33.000 Is this the first I've heard about until you fucking brought it up?

01:44:36.000 I'm on the ball, son.

01:44:37.000 I'm on all that stuff.

01:44:38.000 But still!

01:44:38.000 Powerful Matt Staggs sent me that.

01:44:40.000 Shout out to Matt Staggs.

01:44:41.000 I like that guy.

01:44:42.000 He's awesome.

01:44:43.000 He's a great guy.

01:44:44.000 This whole...

01:44:45.000 What we're experiencing now is this...

01:44:47.000 You know, this...

01:44:50.000 Escalating sort of technological race like one invention like this is going to allow for the idea of several other different inventions And maybe they'll come up with something they add this to CRISPR you know CRISPR this new genetic Reprogramming I don't know the best way to describe it,

01:45:09.000 but it's a tool for altering genetics now they get a hold of that and they use it with this so you use CRISPR and this you got the Hulk and You got Jon Jones and Brock Lesnar baby.

01:45:20.000 You got the Hulk.

01:45:21.000 Fuck Jon Jones and Brock Lesnar if the Hulk shows up.

01:45:23.000 Right?

01:45:24.000 Not if they had a baby.

01:45:26.000 He's fucking crashing through the wall.

01:45:28.000 He leaps through the fucking arena.

01:45:30.000 Just recovering non-stop?

01:45:31.000 Literally from the dressing room.

01:45:33.000 Leaps through the air and boom!

01:45:36.000 Lands in the center of the octagon and goes...

01:45:38.000 And Brock Lesnar just goes...

01:45:42.000 Shit.

01:45:43.000 That was the best, when the Hulk grabs that fucking Thor's brother, and he's like, I'm a god, and he just grabs him and just rags him on the ground, back and forth, busts up the concrete.

01:45:54.000 I fucking love the idea that some peaceful Mark Ruffalo character, who's this brilliant scientist, who's concerned with helping people, if you piss this motherfucker off, he becomes a bulletproof giant.

01:46:09.000 That's pretty dope.

01:46:09.000 Not only did it happen so quick that he tried to shoot himself in the mouth, and by the time the bullet hit the skin, the Hulk spit out the bullet.

01:46:19.000 Come on, son.

01:46:20.000 It's the greatest fucking superhero character of all time.

01:46:23.000 It's inspiring shit, though.

01:46:23.000 Oh, the Hulk, you think?

01:46:24.000 Yes!

01:46:25.000 Everybody else can suck my dick. 1.00

01:46:27.000 Every single one of them.

01:46:28.000 You know why?

01:46:29.000 Because they all call on the Hulk if the shit goes wrong.

01:46:31.000 If everything goes wrong, like, what just sending the Hulk?

01:46:34.000 What's that asshole with the bow and arrow doing there?

01:46:36.000 Get Get the fuck out of there, Scarlett Johansson. 1.00

01:46:39.000 What are you going to do, triangle people with your stilettos on? 1.00

01:46:42.000 Shut the fuck up, everybody.

01:46:44.000 Call in the green guy, and let's just get this over with.

01:46:47.000 He's out there punching spaceships into oblivion.

01:46:51.000 And what are you doing?

01:46:52.000 Are you going to shoot arrows?

01:46:53.000 Are you going to shoot arrows at the spaceship, Archer?

01:46:55.000 Get the fuck out of here.

01:46:57.000 I love you some Hulk.

01:46:58.000 He's the best!

01:46:59.000 He's the only one to call!

01:47:00.000 If I was Captain America, I'd be like, listen, this is stupid.

01:47:03.000 Captain America?

01:47:04.000 Get the fuck out of my face! 0.95

01:47:06.000 Yeah, look, he wanted to get some water.

01:47:08.000 She's the only one that can calm him down.

01:47:10.000 Oh my god.

01:47:10.000 Calm down, Hulk.

01:47:11.000 Calm down.

01:47:12.000 Boy, that looks so fake there.

01:47:14.000 That looks stupid.

01:47:16.000 That looks like my kid drew it.

01:47:18.000 It looks like Shrek!

01:47:22.000 There was two Hulks though, yeah? 0.99

01:47:24.000 It was Eric Banner and then the Mark Ruffalo.

01:47:26.000 There's been a bunch of them.

01:47:27.000 Yeah, Ed Norton was one.

01:47:28.000 Eric Banner was the worst.

01:47:30.000 I went to see that Eric Banner movie when I was, not that he's a bad actor, he's an amazing actor.

01:47:34.000 He was great in Chopper.

01:47:35.000 Did you ever see him in Chopper?

01:47:36.000 He's a ridiculous actor.

01:47:37.000 Fucking fantastic.

01:47:38.000 But there was something about that Hulk movie with him that I was like, this is whack.

01:47:42.000 That's not his fault, huh?

01:47:43.000 I went to see it super duper high, and when I went to see it super duper high, I was like, oh my god, the acting in this movie is so bad.

01:47:51.000 Marijuana is the number one detector of shitty acting.

01:47:55.000 You just sense it.

01:47:57.000 There he is.

01:47:58.000 Go big screen on that.

01:48:00.000 That looks pretty fake too, son.

01:48:01.000 That's Eric Bana one.

01:48:03.000 That's early days.

01:48:04.000 That's the first Hulk.

01:48:05.000 That's San Francisco Hulk.

01:48:06.000 Yeah.

01:48:07.000 So you see the difference between the Ed Norton Hulk on the right and actually the...

01:48:11.000 The one on the left looks bloated.

01:48:13.000 Terrible.

01:48:13.000 The one on the left looks bloated.

01:48:15.000 Bana Hulk looks so fake.

01:48:16.000 The Ed Norton one is so much better.

01:48:18.000 Which one's this?

01:48:19.000 That's the Bana. 1.00

01:48:20.000 That looks like shit!

01:48:22.000 Now go to the most recent, the Mark Ruffalo Hulk.

01:48:25.000 Let's see what that one looks like.

01:48:29.000 Yeah, the Mark Ruffalo Hulk is the best Hulk.

01:48:32.000 Yeah, that's it right there.

01:48:33.000 Looks a little more realistic.

01:48:34.000 A little more.

01:48:35.000 But I mean, obviously it's still a Hulk.

01:48:37.000 Ooh, go full screen.

01:48:38.000 Jesus Christ.

01:48:39.000 Yeah, that's dope.

01:48:40.000 Yeah, if that thing hops into the octagon, Brock Lesnar, good luck.

01:48:43.000 Yeah, you're fucked.

01:48:44.000 If your whole thing is that you're big and strong, and that's a big part of what Brock Lesnar's thing is, he's big and strong.

01:48:50.000 It's his only thing.

01:48:52.000 Yeah, I mean...

01:48:52.000 He's like the Hulk of UFC fighters.

01:48:55.000 What are you, you gonna Mighty Mouse the Hulk?

01:48:56.000 Oh, that looks real as shit.

01:48:57.000 Is that what you're gonna do?

01:48:58.000 You gonna move around him?

01:49:00.000 It looks real as fuck.

01:49:01.000 That looks very real.

01:49:02.000 Well, that was the Ed Norton one, the opening scene when he fucking...

01:49:06.000 Ooh, that does look good.

01:49:07.000 Yeah, it looks dope.

01:49:09.000 His teeth are fucked.

01:49:10.000 If they can figure out a way to do that to people, the world's going to be a totally different place.

01:49:15.000 It's not that far away.

01:49:16.000 Look, think of what they could do with steroids. 0.97

01:49:18.000 Did you ever see that guy who just died?

01:49:20.000 Rich Piana, his name is?

01:49:23.000 He's a famous internet bodybuilder guy.

01:49:26.000 Oh yes, I saw him at Gold's a bunch of times.

01:49:28.000 Nicest guy ever.

01:49:29.000 He seems like a very nice guy.

01:49:31.000 His arms are as big as my entire torso.

01:49:34.000 Look at the size of this fucker. 0.93

01:49:35.000 He just died.

01:49:36.000 And I think they suspect painkillers did him in.

01:49:41.000 I mean, I can't imagine steroids didn't have some sort of play in the death of this man.

01:49:46.000 It could very well have.

01:49:47.000 But they were suspecting painkillers.

01:49:51.000 Apparently, all the big cycles that he did were like a long time ago.

01:49:54.000 And he doesn't really do those big cycles anymore.

01:49:57.000 Dude, he is jacked city.

01:50:01.000 That's so preposterous.

01:50:02.000 Look at that photo right there.

01:50:03.000 That is so preposterous.

01:50:05.000 Look at the size of his arm.

01:50:08.000 It's like he's got a person that's head is attached to his shoulder.

01:50:12.000 Look at his veins!

01:50:13.000 And the person's like holding their body, like his bicep is a person's body with their arms crossed.

01:50:19.000 It's like the three of arms put together in here.

01:50:21.000 He's enormous.

01:50:22.000 Or was, I should say.

01:50:24.000 I know.

01:50:25.000 But yeah, you...

01:50:26.000 He going to coma or something?

01:50:28.000 I don't know.

01:50:29.000 Look at that picture there!

01:50:30.000 Of him and this other giant dude.

01:50:33.000 What?

01:50:33.000 What is that?

01:50:33.000 Natural bodybuilder.

01:50:35.000 What?

01:50:35.000 What are you saying?

01:50:36.000 Natural bodybuilder Mike O'Hearn.

01:50:39.000 That's Mike O'Hearn on the right.

01:50:40.000 Opens up steroid...

01:50:42.000 What is it?

01:50:43.000 Whatever.

01:50:44.000 Is that bodybuilding.com?

01:50:46.000 People get super into that shit.

01:50:47.000 Muscle roast.

01:50:48.000 Muscle roast.

01:50:49.000 Okay.

01:50:50.000 If that guy's real, if that's a real natural bodybuilder...

01:50:55.000 Not.

01:50:56.000 We need to find out what he's eating.

01:51:00.000 And let's see if he passes the golden snitch test.

01:51:02.000 Yeah, he's naturally on steroids.

01:51:04.000 He's just clean the day of the competition, probably.

01:51:08.000 All those fucking guys do it.

01:51:10.000 Why would you not?

01:51:10.000 You're not hurting anybody.

01:51:14.000 He's Shred City, though. 0.95

01:51:15.000 Natural bodybuilder.

01:51:16.000 Well, it's got to be possible to get a certain size.

01:51:21.000 Yeah, there's some genetics.

01:51:22.000 Like, the biggest freaks I know are genetically.

01:51:24.000 Look at my friend Klopp.

01:51:25.000 Tebow's fucking shredded naturally.

01:51:27.000 Those guys are, but that's too much.

01:51:30.000 Look at that picture of him with a six-pack of him.

01:51:32.000 Go back.

01:51:33.000 Oh, that's right!

01:51:35.000 Look at that picture of him.

01:51:35.000 Look at that.

01:51:36.000 Come on, son.

01:51:37.000 That dude's jack-sooty. 1.00

01:51:39.000 If that is natural, 100% natural, that's insane genetics.

01:51:43.000 It'd be the most insane genetics I've ever seen, and I'd be willing to bet my life on it he has something running through his system.

01:51:49.000 But is it possible to be built like that with nothing else than genetics and hard work?

01:51:54.000 What do you think, Joe?

01:51:55.000 I say no.

01:51:58.000 Well, I want to say no, but I think that Tyron Woodley could probably look like that.

01:52:03.000 That guy's 6'4", sir.

01:52:05.000 I don't mean, like, the height.

01:52:07.000 I mean, if Tyron...

01:52:08.000 You look at, like, Tyron's body.

01:52:10.000 Yeah, that's right.

01:52:10.000 Tyron's jacked.

01:52:11.000 Like, naturally jacked.

01:52:12.000 Like, he has superior genetics.

01:52:14.000 Look at his genetics on the left, though.

01:52:16.000 That's him?

01:52:16.000 Yes.

01:52:18.000 So he wasn't born like that.

01:52:19.000 You know what I'm saying?

01:52:20.000 Genetically, he's not made that.

01:52:21.000 Well, he was partying back then.

01:52:22.000 But look at any picture of Woodley ever.

01:52:24.000 He's shredded.

01:52:25.000 Jacked.

01:52:26.000 You can eat Subway every day and be shredded.

01:52:27.000 Francis Ngannou.

01:52:28.000 Here's another one.

01:52:28.000 Some people have superior genetics.

01:52:30.000 It's weird.

01:52:30.000 Keep mentioning black people.

01:52:32.000 Yeah, black people have crazy genetics. 1.00

01:52:35.000 But, but, but, but, but.

01:52:38.000 There's got to be natural bodybuilders that are jacked. 0.94

01:52:40.000 I had a friend back in the day, Brian Frazier, a friend of mine from Boston who was a stand-up comedian who was jacked.

01:52:48.000 He was huge back in the day.

01:52:49.000 But was he thick and tall?

01:52:50.000 Yes.

01:52:50.000 No.

01:52:51.000 He wasn't that tall.

01:52:52.000 He was like maybe...

01:52:53.000 I think he's 5'10 or 5'11.

01:52:55.000 But at the time, super jacked.

01:52:58.000 Like giant muscles.

01:52:59.000 And I know for a fact, he never did anything.

01:53:01.000 That he told you about?

01:53:02.000 No, he didn't.

01:53:03.000 I'm telling you.

01:53:03.000 I know the guy very well.

01:53:05.000 He didn't do shit.

01:53:06.000 But I know a natural bodybuilder, and he's a beast.

01:53:08.000 He trains for Doom.

01:53:09.000 He trains a lot of these guys.

01:53:11.000 His name's Mike Safai.

01:53:12.000 He trains out of Anderson Silva's gym, or used to it.

01:53:15.000 I think he's training out of Henry Gracie's gym.

01:53:19.000 And he's a natural bodybuilder.

01:53:20.000 He competes, and he is fucking shredded.

01:53:24.000 Is he big?

01:53:25.000 No.

01:53:26.000 He's like thin and strong.

01:53:28.000 Yeah, there he is.

01:53:29.000 Yeah, that's shredded.

01:53:30.000 Now that's totally possible to do naturally.

01:53:32.000 He's all natural.

01:53:33.000 Enough for a fact.

01:53:34.000 It can totally be done.

01:53:35.000 His whole family's like this.

01:53:36.000 His brothers, his sister, they're all built that same way.

01:53:40.000 Totally can be done.

01:53:40.000 The question is, can you do what the other guy looks like?

01:53:43.000 No.

01:53:43.000 That's different.

01:53:44.000 I shouldn't say no, because my buddy Klopp, he's 6'6", 270, and he eats like shit, and he's jacked and shredded.

01:53:53.000 If he got on a regular diet, like a strict keto, I'm sure he'd lean out even more.

01:53:59.000 And if he got obsessed with lifting, like he was lifting every day.

01:54:02.000 Which he is.

01:54:03.000 Several times a day.

01:54:04.000 Yeah, like it was his job?

01:54:05.000 Yeah.

01:54:06.000 Yeah, maybe it is possible.

01:54:08.000 You'd have to be a freak of all freaks.

01:54:10.000 It's like girls with giant natural tits. 1.00

01:54:13.000 Like, whoa, where'd that come from?

01:54:14.000 Like, they do exist.

01:54:16.000 Yeah, God bless them.

01:54:16.000 Yeah.

01:54:17.000 Guys with huge hogs. 1.00

01:54:18.000 They exist.

01:54:19.000 Do they ever.

01:54:22.000 Do they ever.

01:54:26.000 People with big noses.

01:54:27.000 Am I right?

01:54:28.000 Am I right?

01:54:29.000 Some girls must love a guy with a big nose so they can eat their pussy from behind. 1.00

01:54:33.000 Some chicks love a big nose. 1.00

01:54:35.000 That's why.

01:54:36.000 It's very strange.

01:54:36.000 They want to back their ass up into his nose.

01:54:38.000 They want nose in the ass, mouth on the pussy. 1.00

01:54:41.000 That's what they want.

01:54:42.000 You think that's why they love a big shark nose?

01:54:44.000 Joey Diaz used to have a bit about it.

01:54:45.000 It's called doing the pigeon.

01:54:52.000 I think that's what it is.

01:54:54.000 I don't know.

01:54:55.000 For sure.

01:54:55.000 But as a girl, you can't have a huge nose.

01:54:58.000 No.

01:54:59.000 That doesn't help.

01:54:59.000 It doesn't help.

01:55:00.000 No.

01:55:00.000 Like Cyrano de Berger, it would help if she was lying on her back with her head leaning over backwards.

01:55:07.000 That nose could be like a taint rub, right?

01:55:11.000 That bird?

01:55:11.000 Oh, that bird's horrible.

01:55:13.000 Is that video that I put on my Instagram with this bird fucking up this chick? 1.00

01:55:16.000 A woodpecker finds these chicks in this bird nest and just starts jacking them, man.

01:55:22.000 Goddamn!

01:55:23.000 It's horrifying.

01:55:24.000 Is that woodpecker on woodpecker crime, or is that like a pigeon he's fucking up like that?

01:55:28.000 I think that's just another bird, some other kind of bird.

01:55:30.000 Holy fuck, he's bashed his brains in.

01:55:32.000 He ate his brains.

01:55:32.000 See if he had that crisper, he could figure it out.

01:55:35.000 And that fucking chick can't do anything. 1.00

01:55:37.000 It's just getting literally stabbed in the head repeatedly by a woodpecker.

01:55:41.000 Oh my god!

01:55:42.000 Fuck woodpeckers! 0.97

01:55:44.000 Man, man, people, we have a weird idea what nature is, and you need to see things like that.

01:55:48.000 Like, there's a great website, Instagram page, NatureIsMetal.

01:55:52.000 Is that the one that I, was that what I retweeted?

01:55:54.000 NatureIsMetal?

01:55:55.000 It is NatureIsMetal.

01:55:56.000 It's one of my favorite, I go to that every day.

01:55:58.000 NatureIsMetal is crazy.

01:55:59.000 It's all clips of shit getting jacked.

01:56:02.000 Everything is crocodiles jacking gazelles and hippos jacking crocodiles and crocodiles jacking other crocodiles.

01:56:09.000 Oh, that's an otter going ham on a croc. 0.99

01:56:11.000 That's an alligator. 0.94

01:56:12.000 But, yeah, otters are ruthless, bro.

01:56:15.000 If an otter thinks that a...

01:56:16.000 Look at that thing. 0.92

01:56:17.000 It's a fucking hawk tearing apart another bird.

01:56:19.000 Holy fuck.

01:56:20.000 Dude.

01:56:22.000 Nature is metal.

01:56:23.000 It's a great name.

01:56:23.000 Let me see a more than an early one, though.

01:56:24.000 I'm not sold yet.

01:56:25.000 There's one of a lion head.

01:56:27.000 Oh, that'll do it.

01:56:28.000 Yeah, look at that.

01:56:29.000 Crocodile.

01:56:30.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.

01:56:31.000 Look at that one.

01:56:32.000 Crocodile with another crocodile in its mouth.

01:56:34.000 Doing a crocodile roll.

01:56:36.000 Swinging it through the air by its head.

01:56:38.000 And ripping his face off.

01:56:39.000 They are fucking ruthless.

01:56:41.000 Go big screen on that.

01:56:42.000 No new friends.

01:56:43.000 Hashtag no new friends.

01:56:44.000 Ripping his face off.

01:56:45.000 Hashtag no new friends.

01:56:46.000 That's the greatest hashtag ever.

01:56:47.000 That's so funny.

01:56:48.000 Look at that fucking...

01:56:49.000 Look at that teeth on that thing. 1.00

01:56:51.000 Did you see that reporter?

01:56:53.000 He was surfing with his friends in Sri Lanka last night and got eaten alive by a crocodile.

01:56:57.000 Oh, great.

01:56:58.000 He went to go wash his hands and the crocodile was like, oh, cool story.

01:57:01.000 Reporter got him?

01:57:03.000 He got a reporter?

01:57:04.000 No, the guy, his job was a reporter.

01:57:06.000 He was out in Sri Lanka just vacationing, surfboarding.

01:57:09.000 And a saltwater croc got his ass. 0.66

01:57:11.000 Goddamn saltwater crocs are terrifying.

01:57:13.000 Look at that one up top.

01:57:14.000 Oh my god.

01:57:14.000 Look at the one up top where the deer got jacked by a tree.

01:57:17.000 Look at that.

01:57:18.000 Boom.

01:57:18.000 Tree dropped on its head.

01:57:20.000 The tree just fell on its head.

01:57:21.000 What are the odds?

01:57:22.000 Not good.

01:57:23.000 It's a terrible way to go.

01:57:25.000 Terrible way to go.

01:57:27.000 Just landed right on his head.

01:57:28.000 How the fuck does that only have 159 likes?

01:57:31.000 Because now we'll talk about it and get more likes.

01:57:33.000 Page is about to blow up probably.

01:57:35.000 It's only got 17,500.

01:57:36.000 Page is gonna blow!

01:57:37.000 It should.

01:57:38.000 Nature is metal and then underscore.

01:57:41.000 But go further down.

01:57:42.000 There's some fucking crazy ones on that page. 0.87

01:57:44.000 I go to this shit every day.

01:57:46.000 I'm gonna follow it now.

01:57:48.000 Yeah, there's a lot.

01:57:48.000 Oh my god, that hawk's about to fuck up that snake there.

01:57:51.000 Look at that one.

01:57:52.000 Yeah, go back please.

01:57:55.000 Look at this one with this crocodile right here.

01:57:57.000 The mouth open with a zebra head in his mouth.

01:58:00.000 Look at that.

01:58:01.000 Oh, you know what?

01:58:01.000 People send me these all the time because when I was leaving Fox, I said I'm a zebra.

01:58:07.000 And I went, you ever seen anyone fucking ride a zebra?

01:58:10.000 You can't.

01:58:11.000 I'm a zebra.

01:58:11.000 People are like, really?

01:58:13.000 And then they send me these all the time.

01:58:15.000 Look at the mouth on that thing. 1.00

01:58:16.000 That is a fucking dinosaur.

01:58:19.000 That's a dinosaur.

01:58:20.000 That zebra is fucking... 0.99

01:58:21.000 I'm not mad at his set of his teeth either than that, but he's obviously older, right?

01:58:26.000 Like, that's an old aged... 0.97

01:58:27.000 Oh, they fucked their teeth up pretty quick.

01:58:30.000 They probably don't live that long.

01:58:31.000 I mean, I would assume that zebras, much like any other animal that lives in the wild, you know, if you can get to ten years, congratulations, you did something amazing.

01:58:42.000 Yeah, you're killing the game.

01:58:43.000 But those zebras, if you're like... 1.00

01:58:48.000 Looking at their...

01:58:49.000 Look at that owl about to jack that mouse. 0.98

01:58:51.000 That's a beautiful picture.

01:58:51.000 It's a metaphor for life.

01:58:52.000 It's an amazing picture.

01:58:54.000 The zebra stripes, those are designed so that a lion has a hard time picking out one individual animal.

01:59:00.000 Is that why they do it and they're always together in a herd?

01:59:03.000 Because you can't tell if you look at them.

01:59:04.000 I always wanted that because to me they would stick out being black and white in the goddamn desert.

01:59:08.000 No.

01:59:08.000 Not in Africa.

01:59:09.000 This is one of the things they did.

01:59:11.000 They put a collar on a zebra to track them and every time they would do it, that zebra would get killed.

01:59:17.000 Oh, because they could see it.

01:59:18.000 Because they could see it.

01:59:19.000 It would stand out.

01:59:20.000 I could see that collar.

01:59:21.000 Like, that's the one.

01:59:21.000 See that?

01:59:22.000 There's a pattern that they use for camo.

01:59:26.000 That, um...

01:59:28.000 There's a company called First Light.

01:59:29.000 They make, if not the best, one of the best hunting gears in the world.

01:59:35.000 They make this really fine merino wool clothes that they put camo patterns on.

01:59:40.000 When you sweat in merino wool, it's really good because you never get cold.

01:59:44.000 It's a natural fiber.

01:59:46.000 But anyway, they have this...

01:59:49.000 One pattern they use called ASAT. A-S-A-T. All season, all terrain.

01:59:54.000 And in a way, it kind of mimics what you see in a zebra.

01:59:58.000 So what a zebra is like, you can't make out the outline.

02:00:01.000 No, yeah.

02:00:01.000 Because there's the blacks and the whites, the contrast.

02:00:04.000 It's like you have a hard time for an animal.

02:00:06.000 And this camel's black and white?

02:00:07.000 This camo's got a few different shades in it, but the idea behind the invention of this camo was one of the first camos.

02:00:13.000 Like most camos back in the day used to be either like army shit, like fatigues, or they would be like leaves, like actual leaves.

02:00:22.000 Like a lot of companies started making like where it looks like photorealistic trees and patterns and stuff, which kind of works.

02:00:28.000 Kind of.

02:00:28.000 The whole idea, that's ASAT. So see how that is like, it breaks up.

02:00:35.000 Looks like Yeezy Season 4. Go up right up there to the jacket, Jamie.

02:00:39.000 The jacket right there?

02:00:40.000 Yeah.

02:00:40.000 That's kind of a ghillie suit where it has all this extra phrase to it that you would use that if you were hunting turkeys because turkeys can see real good.

02:00:50.000 When you're wearing that, the idea is that all those stripes break up your outline.

02:00:54.000 That's sort of the exact same reason why a zebra has that shit.

02:00:58.000 I did not know that.

02:00:59.000 I always wanted that.

02:00:59.000 I always wanted it too.

02:01:01.000 Have you seen the new body suits they're doing in the water for sharks?

02:01:06.000 Hex suits?

02:01:06.000 Have you seen those?

02:01:07.000 They're kind of dope.

02:01:09.000 Are you saying so the sharks can't see your electrical signals?

02:01:12.000 No, it's for sharks so they don't think you're a seal.

02:01:15.000 Oh, what does it do?

02:01:17.000 Is it a different color?

02:01:18.000 Yeah, it's somewhere black and white if you look at them.

02:01:21.000 There's this thing called Hex, H-E-C-S, and they're these suits that people wear in particular when they go to...

02:01:28.000 Is this it, Jamie?

02:01:30.000 What is this?

02:01:30.000 I don't know.

02:01:32.000 Carbon, full-sleeve wetsuit?

02:01:33.000 No, that's just pretty.

02:01:34.000 Nah.

02:01:35.000 That makes you look like a fish.

02:01:37.000 I'd fuck you up if you were in there.

02:01:38.000 Fuck yeah, you look like a sweet-ass delicious tuna.

02:01:40.000 Go to Hecsuit. 0.99

02:01:41.000 H-E-C-S. So I don't know if this is real. 0.99

02:01:44.000 So this is one of the things that I want to...

02:01:47.000 Just write Hecsuit. 0.97

02:01:48.000 H-E-C-S suit. 0.96

02:01:51.000 Um...

02:01:51.000 I would love people...

02:01:53.000 Yeah, hex suit.

02:01:55.000 I would love people to tell me whether or not this really works.

02:01:59.000 Because apparently your body is supposed to emit some sort of electrical signal.

02:02:04.000 And if you run your body over this thing, it registers your body's electrical signal.

02:02:12.000 But if you put this hex suit on and run your body over this thing, it doesn't register.

02:02:17.000 Does that prove that it's really working?

02:02:18.000 The guy's chilling with turkeys?

02:02:20.000 I don't know.

02:02:21.000 At least that guy's in shape.

02:02:21.000 I mean, but it works apparently, like noticeably works in the water.

02:02:26.000 Like this guy's, what he's doing here.

02:02:28.000 He's just fucking grabbing lobsters.

02:02:30.000 I can do that right now.

02:02:31.000 No, no, no.

02:02:32.000 No, you can't.

02:02:33.000 They try to get the fuck away from you. 0.55

02:02:34.000 With this hex suit on, they've shown the difference between wearing it and not wearing it.

02:02:38.000 And it seems to allow, see this I'm not impressed with, because he's about to shoot this animal and that animal can't see him.

02:02:44.000 Anybody could do that.

02:02:45.000 I could do that with, like, clothes on.

02:02:47.000 If the animal can't see you, it doesn't matter.

02:02:49.000 Yeah, if the animal doesn't see you, it doesn't matter.

02:02:51.000 But if the animal sees you, the idea is that this hex suit is supposed to somehow or another protect you.

02:02:55.000 They shouldn't have shown that one, because that video didn't even mean anything.

02:02:59.000 It's like you couldn't see that the animal was looking his way.

02:03:02.000 That's interesting, though.

02:03:04.000 See, it shows, like, see, go back a little bit.

02:03:08.000 So watch it shows when they walk in front.

02:03:10.000 No, you just had it.

02:03:11.000 Just leave it alone.

02:03:12.000 Go back.

02:03:14.000 They're kind of showing the name, man.

02:03:15.000 Okay, watch.

02:03:16.000 See, he's passing in front of it, and without hex, you see how it registers?

02:03:20.000 Now, with the hex suit on, it registers very little.

02:03:24.000 And this is somehow or another supposed to be recognizing the electrical signal that your body has.

02:03:30.000 I got to piss so bad.

02:03:32.000 Why don't you go piss, man?

02:03:33.000 Thanks, bro.

02:03:33.000 Get your piss on, son.

02:03:35.000 Get your piss on. 0.62

02:03:35.000 See, this doesn't impress me. 0.62

02:03:37.000 This is a fucking armadillo.

02:03:38.000 How smart an armadillo is.

02:03:39.000 Do you know anyone that has one?

02:03:41.000 John Dudley.

02:03:42.000 He believes in it.

02:03:43.000 That's why I'm curious about it.

02:03:45.000 Because I don't know how much...

02:03:46.000 There's John Dudley right now.

02:03:47.000 Hex testimonial.

02:03:48.000 I just don't know how much science is behind it.

02:03:52.000 I mean, a lot of times you want to believe that things work.

02:03:58.000 It works with coyotes, too.

02:04:00.000 That's the weird one.

02:04:01.000 Coyotes walk right up to people that are wearing it.

02:04:03.000 The idea is that animals might have certain senses and abilities to detect signals that you give off that we just don't possess.

02:04:11.000 So because we don't possess those abilities to recognize those signals, we don't recognize that these animals do.

02:04:17.000 Because we don't think of it as an option.

02:04:19.000 And what they're saying is...

02:04:21.000 It's entirely possible, especially with predators apparently, entirely possible that animals emit some sort of an electrical signal that animals are attracted to.

02:04:31.000 And then when they see this person wearing this hex suit, those signals don't come through and they don't know what the fuck you are.

02:04:38.000 Which is really fascinating.

02:04:40.000 See, electromagnetic signal, right?

02:04:42.000 Is that what it's saying?

02:04:43.000 Yeah.

02:04:45.000 I don't know how much of it is real though.

02:04:48.000 I've never seen a study on it.

02:04:51.000 Do they have studies on this?

02:04:52.000 When you go up there, when it says proof, do they have a proof thing?

02:04:56.000 If you go to the top...

02:04:57.000 I went to how it works.

02:04:58.000 Yeah, how does it work?

02:04:59.000 That's where I'm looking.

02:05:00.000 There's no links, or it just talks about it.

02:05:03.000 Yeah, see, I feel like hex blocks your electrical signal.

02:05:07.000 Okay.

02:05:08.000 Seems to block that.

02:05:09.000 The real question to me is...

02:05:12.000 Do the animals see it?

02:05:14.000 They've done extensive studies on what animals do and don't see, as far as camouflage, and I think one of the ways they've done that, and what kind of light they see, one of the ways they've done that is through, like, they have, like, deer farms where they have undulates in captivity, and they feed them,

02:05:30.000 and they only feed them if they can see certain things, or they show them certain things, and that's how they measure whether or not they're actually able to recognize patterns.

02:05:41.000 Because some patterns are really good.

02:05:43.000 Like some patterns just completely break up the outline of a person to an animal and the animal just sees some weird shit that looks like a bush.

02:05:52.000 Size of the mesh is crucial to effectively blocking human electricity.

02:05:55.000 This Faraday cage is what it's explaining, which is the part I was just kind of looking at.

02:05:59.000 This is the science.

02:06:00.000 Invented in 1836, so just before a dude invented chiropractic by an English scientist, Michael Faraday, a Faraday cage is an enclosure made out of a conductive mesh material that blocks electrical fields.

02:06:14.000 By channeling the electricity through the mesh, it's used to protect electronic equipment from lightning strikes, Or in screen rooms, which allows for environments to be free of electromagnetic interference.

02:06:25.000 That makes sense.

02:06:27.000 What I don't know is whether or not an animal can see that.

02:06:30.000 I'd like to know.

02:06:32.000 Why don't you Google, can animals detect electrical energy?

02:06:38.000 I'm pretty sure that's why it shows those flocks of birds floating around.

02:06:43.000 From what I've read, science, I believe, thinks that's how they're communicating.

02:06:48.000 Through electricity?

02:06:48.000 Like schools of fish, or magnetic waves, electromagnetic waves.

02:06:53.000 Yeah, I mean, it only makes sense if you watch those giant...

02:06:57.000 Flocks of birds all flowing together that they have some sort of way of interacting with each other that we don't understand.

02:07:02.000 Like, what is it?

02:07:03.000 I don't know.

02:07:04.000 But there's something going on.

02:07:06.000 I mean, there's no way you could ever get people to fly through the air like that.

02:07:09.000 I mean, just...

02:07:10.000 I've heard people that said they've taken, like, the god dose of mushrooms can see it when they're, like, all fucked up and on the beach.

02:07:15.000 They can see magnetic waves coming in off waves.

02:07:18.000 But, like, I've never been that high.

02:07:21.000 I apologize.

02:07:21.000 That took so long.

02:07:22.000 No worries.

02:07:22.000 That was a brutal piss.

02:07:24.000 That was not a piss, bro.

02:07:25.000 Listen to this.

02:07:25.000 I was trying to be cool.

02:07:27.000 I don't know if you could tell that the shit sweats.

02:07:28.000 No, listen to this.

02:07:29.000 What happened?

02:07:30.000 I haven't eaten anything all day.

02:07:32.000 And I went to Starbucks.

02:07:33.000 I went, you know what?

02:07:33.000 Give me one of those nitro brews.

02:07:35.000 I need a venti.

02:07:36.000 And she goes, we don't do ventis.

02:07:37.000 It's dangerous.

02:07:39.000 What's a nitro brew?

02:07:40.000 It's like a crazy kind of like, I think a Guinness coffee that comes out of like a tap.

02:07:46.000 Same shit.

02:07:47.000 Oh, it's like, it's just like a Cape Man Nitro? 1.00

02:07:50.000 Yeah, yeah.

02:07:50.000 Oh, okay.

02:07:51.000 Cape Man Nitro, super strong.

02:07:52.000 I'm like, give me a venti.

02:07:54.000 You know, I got some shit to do.

02:07:55.000 So it's nitrogenated coffee.

02:07:56.000 Yeah, super strong.

02:07:57.000 She goes, I can't give you a venti, only a grande.

02:07:59.000 I went, all right, fine, just put two shots in it.

02:08:01.000 She goes, we don't recommend it.

02:08:02.000 I go, put two shots in it.

02:08:04.000 So that's what I got.

02:08:05.000 Yeah, put two shots in it. 0.99

02:08:07.000 You see that slingshot, bitch? 1.00

02:08:09.000 Put two shots in it.

02:08:11.000 She did that, and halfway through talking about camouflage, I went, oh, shit!

02:08:18.000 Miss Starbucks was right.

02:08:20.000 Yeah, that horn that blows off.

02:08:21.000 I almost shit my pants.

02:08:22.000 I swear, that was the closest I've ever come to shit my pants on fucking...

02:08:26.000 On a podcast?

02:08:27.000 On anything.

02:08:28.000 I don't shit my pants.

02:08:29.000 You don't shit your pants ever?

02:08:30.000 No.

02:08:31.000 Remember when Brian Lydon said he shit his pants?

02:08:32.000 Because he was late or missed a show?

02:08:35.000 Yeah.

02:08:35.000 It's hilarious.

02:08:37.000 Grown men don't shit their pants.

02:08:38.000 He had a spare pair of pants in his trunk and just changed them.

02:08:41.000 What'd you do with the old pants?

02:08:42.000 I just threw them away.

02:08:43.000 Classic.

02:08:44.000 Oh, you did?

02:08:44.000 How'd you clean up?

02:08:45.000 I just went to a gas station.

02:08:46.000 Oh, sure you did.

02:08:47.000 He's the funniest guy ever.

02:08:49.000 Makes total sense.

02:08:50.000 It's a car stink.

02:08:51.000 Dude, I was trying to be cool.

02:08:52.000 It's probably a good idea to keep a pair of pants.

02:08:55.000 Underwear, socks, shoes.

02:08:56.000 Why don't you take one small change of clothes in your trunk?

02:09:00.000 Always a smart move.

02:09:01.000 I never do it.

02:09:03.000 Right?

02:09:03.000 It seems like if you have a trunk, what the fuck are you carrying?

02:09:06.000 What's in your trunk?

02:09:07.000 You have room.

02:09:08.000 It's not like it's gonna cost you gas mileage.

02:09:10.000 Just a little bag.

02:09:11.000 Makes sense.

02:09:12.000 Yeah, it does make sense.

02:09:13.000 You don't plan for that.

02:09:14.000 Even shoes.

02:09:14.000 Bring a whole outfit.

02:09:16.000 Yeah.

02:09:16.000 Bring a whole outfit.

02:09:17.000 An extra outfit.

02:09:18.000 So if something terrible happens, Well, I'll tell you right now.

02:09:21.000 Something terrible will happen when I'm on the 405 in that goddamn slingshot with no AC and my stomach's on the frets like this.

02:09:25.000 Why did you get that thing?

02:09:27.000 What was going on?

02:09:28.000 They gave it to me.

02:09:29.000 For free?

02:09:29.000 Yes.

02:09:30.000 That's ridiculous.

02:09:30.000 I'm not that stupid.

02:09:32.000 I'm not like a rat.

02:09:32.000 They said, hey man, have this.

02:09:33.000 They went, yeah, post on it, have it, yeah.

02:09:36.000 So you just have to tell people how ridiculous it is.

02:09:39.000 They didn't even say that.

02:09:40.000 They say, if you want to post about whatever you want to do, man, we want you to take this.

02:09:43.000 Spin it around for me.

02:09:44.000 Cool, right?

02:09:45.000 Might as well.

02:09:47.000 That's amazing.

02:09:47.000 I love the fact that it's got a stick shift.

02:09:50.000 You need to take it for a spin.

02:09:52.000 No, I'm good.

02:09:53.000 I feel weird when I drive that Corvette.

02:09:55.000 The Corvette convertible.

02:09:57.000 Yeah, I know.

02:09:58.000 No roof.

02:09:58.000 I'm like, ooh, there's nothing up there.

02:09:59.000 Well, when I'm behind a truck, I'm like, God, if a rock spits up, I'm going to get hit behind the fucking eye.

02:10:04.000 I know, I always get out of the way.

02:10:05.000 Yeah, you gotta be clever about how you approach, like, large groups of cars when you have a convertible.

02:10:11.000 Or a motorcycle, I guess.

02:10:12.000 That's why I like it, because I'm more in tuned with what's going on.

02:10:15.000 Like, fucking, I'm on it.

02:10:16.000 If I'm on my car, I'm so comfortable, the PDK, I can...

02:10:20.000 Right.

02:10:20.000 ...navigation, bullshitting, jacking off, whatever.

02:10:23.000 Yeah.

02:10:24.000 It's interesting, like, does your car have the CarPlay thing where you can talk to it and tell it to text people?

02:10:29.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

02:10:29.000 How amazing is that?

02:10:30.000 Ridiculous.

02:10:33.000 It reads the text for you, and it tells you, like, would you like to reply?

02:10:38.000 And you're like, yes, I would, bitch. 1.00

02:10:39.000 Text them back whatever you want.

02:10:41.000 You don't need to text anymore.

02:10:43.000 Text them back.

02:10:43.000 I wonder if you could program Siri where you say bitch after everything.

02:10:47.000 Of course, bitch. 1.00

02:10:49.000 Yes, I do, bitch. 1.00

02:10:50.000 For sure.

02:10:50.000 And if you don't say bitch, Siri doesn't recognize it.

02:10:52.000 I'm sorry.

02:10:53.000 What did you say?

02:10:54.000 Bitch, you heard me. 1.00

02:10:56.000 Yes, I did.

02:10:58.000 That new iPhone drops next month.

02:11:00.000 I'm stoked for it.

02:11:02.000 Have you seen it?

02:11:03.000 There's two new iPhones.

02:11:04.000 Oh, you know you have iPhone?

02:11:05.000 Yeah.

02:11:05.000 Finally.

02:11:06.000 There's two new ones.

02:11:07.000 Finally.

02:11:07.000 I only tried a Google phone for like a month.

02:11:09.000 I feel like you were on that Google trip for a second, though.

02:11:12.000 I did.

02:11:12.000 Well, I tried to get off the Apple tit.

02:11:14.000 Yeah, don't.

02:11:14.000 I went with a Windows laptop, and I went with an Android phone.

02:11:18.000 Abandoned both of them.

02:11:19.000 Come on, son.

02:11:20.000 In the announcement for it, they said something when they were showing the Face ID that kind of was...

02:11:25.000 Alarming to me that I didn't know.

02:11:27.000 Oh yeah, terrible.

02:11:27.000 The Touch ID, 1 in 50,000 chance that someone just unlocks your phone without your fingerprint.

02:11:33.000 What?

02:11:34.000 It doesn't seem like that secure.

02:11:36.000 One in 50,000 is pretty goddamn secure, Jamie.

02:11:39.000 Pretty secure, but...

02:11:40.000 I'll take my chances, Jamie.

02:11:41.000 It seems so low.

02:11:42.000 How many dick pics are you carrying around? 1.00

02:11:44.000 No, I don't have anything.

02:11:44.000 I'm just saying.

02:11:45.000 I mean, they can easily get on my...

02:11:46.000 I have Apple Pay put on my phone, so you can start using my card right away.

02:11:51.000 If you start paying for shit.

02:11:52.000 If you had my phone.

02:11:53.000 The new ones, it's face recognition.

02:11:55.000 And that's the next...

02:11:56.000 Well, it says it's one in a million on that.

02:11:57.000 You see that?

02:11:57.000 Yeah.

02:11:58.000 The problem with that is, well, I'm worried about that.

02:12:01.000 I'm worried about you being next to your girl, and your girl sticks your phone right on your face, starts it up, and then is like, oh, look at this motherfucker, Jamie Vernon with a bunch of dick pics. 1.00

02:12:10.000 You fall asleep, she does it.

02:12:12.000 Send in that one.

02:12:12.000 It's the same, fall asleep when she puts your thumb on there and unlocks it easily.

02:12:15.000 That's true.

02:12:16.000 If she tries to get my face on...

02:12:17.000 You touch me when I'm asleep, I will wake up immediately and choke you.

02:12:21.000 Yeah, I just fucking...

02:12:22.000 For this one, it says you have to be looking at it.

02:12:24.000 You have to focus at it.

02:12:25.000 Have your eyes open?

02:12:26.000 Yeah.

02:12:27.000 So then she drugs you, takes her fingers, pulls your eyelids back. 1.00

02:12:30.000 She can do it.

02:12:32.000 Them hoes will figure it out. 1.00

02:12:33.000 All she has to do is paint fake eyeballs on your eyelids. 1.00

02:12:38.000 If you're asleep and she's got white paint.

02:12:40.000 It'd just be crazy.

02:12:42.000 And then she puts like a little black sharpie mark.

02:12:46.000 But it's like the most expensive phone ever?

02:12:49.000 No, I don't know.

02:12:50.000 It's like $1,200 I think if you're buying it outright.

02:12:52.000 That's...

02:12:53.000 I need that.

02:12:54.000 I get that Spider-Man.

02:12:55.000 Look at my phone.

02:12:55.000 My son broke the fuck up.

02:12:57.000 I refuse to get a new one.

02:12:58.000 Why?

02:12:59.000 I'm waiting for the new one to drop.

02:13:01.000 It's coming out soon.

02:13:01.000 But it's interesting.

02:13:02.000 They're coming out with the iPhone 8, 8 Plus, and a 10 all together at the same time.

02:13:06.000 It's like, look, you can go Poe.

02:13:08.000 They skipped the 9. It's just the X. No, it's a 10. Hold on.

02:13:11.000 It's your anniversary.

02:13:13.000 Jamie, it says, iPhone 10. How to pronounce the new iPhone.

02:13:18.000 Then you have Tim Cook saying, we call it iPhone 10. Boom.

02:13:22.000 Hold on.

02:13:22.000 Correct me if you're wrong.

02:13:23.000 I didn't know that.

02:13:25.000 So there's a 9 and a 10?

02:13:26.000 No, there is no 9. I skipped it.

02:13:27.000 There's an 8. But here's the thing.

02:13:29.000 You get these bullshit-ass dead spots where you don't have a screen.

02:13:34.000 Not anymore.

02:13:35.000 So you can feel all poor next to that person that has the 10 that has no...

02:13:39.000 And wireless charging.

02:13:41.000 The 8 has wireless charging too.

02:13:43.000 And it's waterproof now.

02:13:44.000 You can go in the ocean with it.

02:13:46.000 Can you?

02:13:47.000 I think that was with the watch.

02:13:49.000 No.

02:13:49.000 With the phone.

02:13:50.000 Yeah, now it's water resistance.

02:13:52.000 That one's just a little bit waterproof, the new one.

02:13:55.000 But the new, new shit?

02:13:57.000 Water resistance.

02:13:58.000 Swim, son. 0.95

02:14:00.000 Swimming.

02:14:01.000 Underwater picks.

02:14:02.000 The new one is 3, right?

02:14:03.000 iPhone 3. Watch.

02:14:05.000 The watch is the 3?

02:14:06.000 Watch 3, yeah.

02:14:06.000 It has cellular added to it.

02:14:08.000 Ooh, I like it.

02:14:10.000 So you don't even have to bring your phone.

02:14:11.000 You can go running.

02:14:12.000 And then your girl's back at home.

02:14:13.000 She's like, I used your face to find your phone and now I'm calling you from your own phone to say, fuck you. 1.00

02:14:17.000 I'm lighting your house on fire.

02:14:19.000 You dick pic sending son of a bitch. 0.99

02:14:22.000 Son of a bitch. 0.88

02:14:22.000 Dude, I don't get down with iPhone watches. 0.88

02:14:24.000 Not my cup of tea, man.

02:14:25.000 And then you get a phone call like three seconds later.

02:14:28.000 You're receiving dick pics, too!

02:14:30.000 You're taking them, too?

02:14:32.000 Andy Dick wants to suck your dick! 1.00

02:14:33.000 Really?

02:14:34.000 Really?

02:14:35.000 And you didn't block his number!

02:14:36.000 You sent him your address.

02:14:37.000 You're like, LOL! That's what I would say!

02:14:39.000 If I wanted to suck a guy's dick, I'd say, LOL! Come on over and suck my dick! 1.00

02:14:44.000 LOL! I'll be on my way!

02:14:46.000 LOL! You just cut it out!

02:14:48.000 You're being so silly!

02:14:51.000 That's what they say if they know they're gonna suck it.

02:14:53.000 LOL. Then you know you're in.

02:14:55.000 Yeah, if you say that, and then they call you up and go, hey, don't ever fucking text me something like that again.

02:15:00.000 I'm sorry.

02:15:01.000 Just joking around.

02:15:02.000 That's like normal.

02:15:03.000 But if they go, LOL. LOL is basically, yes.

02:15:07.000 LOL is like, she's like getting wet. 1.00

02:15:10.000 She's freaking out.

02:15:10.000 LOL, you're silly.

02:15:12.000 It's on.

02:15:13.000 People say, LOL. LOL, you silly goose. 0.94

02:15:16.000 You silly goose.

02:15:17.000 Gobble, gobble, driving over to your house thinking about it.

02:15:25.000 What is it about these new phones?

02:15:27.000 How much do you need that new phone?

02:15:30.000 How much do you need that new screen?

02:15:31.000 It's like it's a trap.

02:15:32.000 And that's gonna be a piece of shit in a year from now.

02:15:35.000 A year from now, it's gonna be some new things.

02:15:37.000 That's everything, though.

02:15:38.000 It puts pressure on you to get the new phone, because that's what's cool, that's what's hip, but they're adding new stuff to it.

02:15:44.000 It's like the new car.

02:15:45.000 Where's the fingerprint reader?

02:15:46.000 There isn't one.

02:15:47.000 Just your face.

02:15:48.000 Well, you can go fuck yourself.

02:15:49.000 That's stupid.

02:15:50.000 What if my face gets beat up?

02:15:52.000 It knows.

02:15:53.000 It knows.

02:15:53.000 It's learning with you.

02:15:54.000 It knows if you grow a beard.

02:15:56.000 It knows if I have a black eye.

02:15:57.000 Because you would have been looking at it earlier that day.

02:15:58.000 It's kind of scary, man.

02:15:59.000 It's supposedly learning with you.

02:16:01.000 Yeah, what if it fucks up?

02:16:03.000 And that data is all stored somewhere, and it's supposedly encrypted.

02:16:07.000 Jesus!

02:16:08.000 The apple has my face!

02:16:09.000 I just thought about, what are they going to do three or four or five years down the line when they have five years of your aging?

02:16:17.000 Of daily, 12, 15, 20, 30, 40 times a day.

02:16:20.000 Do you think it looks at Kylie Jenner and goes, who the fuck is that guy?

02:16:24.000 Yeah, it's not going to be able to recognize girls fucking getting that Kylie Jenner surgery. 1.00

02:16:28.000 Is it Kylie or Chloe?

02:16:29.000 Which one's the one that has the most?

02:16:30.000 Kylie.

02:16:31.000 By far.

02:16:31.000 They're going to go, what?

02:16:33.000 Where's the rest of your jaw?

02:16:34.000 What's going on here?

02:16:35.000 She's going to have to get a new iPhone every few months just to keep up with it.

02:16:41.000 I don't like that.

02:16:41.000 No fingerprint.

02:16:43.000 I don't think I enjoy that.

02:16:44.000 I think that seems stupid.

02:16:46.000 You might love it, though.

02:16:47.000 No, because a cop is just going to take your face, hold it up, and they'll be able to pull you over.

02:16:52.000 They pull you over, they just take your phone, put it up to your face.

02:16:55.000 All you have to do is look at your phone.

02:16:57.000 I want to know what you're doing.

02:16:58.000 You can't look at my phone.

02:16:59.000 Oh yeah?

02:17:00.000 And they do that, and then they can just do it.

02:17:02.000 Cops have tried to look at people's phones before.

02:17:04.000 They've told people.

02:17:06.000 To see if you're texting?

02:17:07.000 They're allowed to put your finger on it.

02:17:10.000 They're not allowed.

02:17:10.000 No.

02:17:11.000 Yes they are.

02:17:11.000 They're not allowed to enter your password.

02:17:13.000 They're not allowed for you to ask what the password is.

02:17:16.000 That's why they'd say, for people, you should not use the fingerprint part because cops can actually actively use it because it's not specifically stated.

02:17:26.000 Like, you're not allowed- It's a loophole.

02:17:28.000 Yes, loophole.

02:17:28.000 Oh, hell no.

02:17:29.000 You're not allowed to tell someone you want their password because that's an invasion of privacy.

02:17:33.000 You are allowed to take their finger and put it on their phone and open their phone up.

02:17:39.000 What the fuck?

02:17:40.000 Exactly.

02:17:41.000 Yeah, it's like technology moving too fast and we don't have the words and the language and the preparations to deal with that shit.

02:17:52.000 There's a new system built into the iOS 11 which comes out in a couple days that allows you to Bypass that sort of if you quick tap five times you can turn off touch ID Hmm, so it's like it's basically what they're calling it is a cop Yeah,

02:18:08.000 I just don't think that's the way to go the facial recognition thing just seems Corny.

02:18:23.000 I gotta do this every time I want to buy something How come I can't just put my fucking thumb on it?

02:18:30.000 You know what it is?

02:18:31.000 Here's the problem.

02:18:32.000 These cunts can't figure out a way to get your fingerprint right off your phone yet. 1.00

02:18:35.000 Right off the main screen.

02:18:36.000 That's what they've been working on forever.

02:18:38.000 Trying to get it on the big screen?

02:18:39.000 Yeah, so you just touch anywhere on the screen and it picks up your fingerprint.

02:18:42.000 That's what they've been working on forever.

02:18:44.000 They do not have that yet.

02:18:45.000 So they went with facial recognition, which they've already had for Snapchat and for Instagram filters and all those things where they see your face and then turn you into Abraham Lincoln or some shit.

02:18:54.000 This does it way better than those...

02:18:55.000 Of course.

02:18:56.000 But it's an acceleration of that.

02:18:57.000 What they haven't been able to do is get your whole screen to be a fingerprint sensor and still be able to show images and all that stuff.

02:19:03.000 I think it's got something like six selfie cameras.

02:19:06.000 One's like IR, one's doing like dots like the Kinect camera was doing.

02:19:10.000 It's like a little Xbox Kinect.

02:19:11.000 Good lord with the selfies.

02:19:13.000 The camera industry just done.

02:19:16.000 When's the last time you saw like a straight-up camera?

02:19:19.000 Well, you'd have to be like a guy who was a photographer, like Jamie.

02:19:23.000 Then you carry those goofy bricks because you want to impress chicks.

02:19:26.000 You know what he's doing?

02:19:27.000 He's just taking pictures of chicks all the time. 0.96

02:19:29.000 You're lighting.

02:19:30.000 Let me just fix your hair. 1.00

02:19:32.000 Fix your hair.

02:19:33.000 But even that thing...

02:19:34.000 Girls love that. 1.00

02:19:34.000 They love to pose. 1.00

02:19:35.000 For sure.

02:19:38.000 Dude, they go...

02:19:39.000 I see them all the time.

02:19:40.000 They just go on, like, little photo shoot dates with their, like, girls two and two, three, four, five at a time, and they're just taking pictures of each other.

02:19:47.000 They don't need to hire the photographer anymore.

02:19:49.000 I've seen that, man.

02:19:50.000 I was at a restaurant, and these two bitches just kept doing that back and forth with each other. 1.00

02:19:53.000 I was like, ladies, enjoy your meal.

02:19:56.000 And they were like, no, like this, like this?

02:19:58.000 Hold on.

02:19:58.000 With their iPhones?

02:19:59.000 Yeah, this is the I'm about to take a selfie face.

02:20:02.000 Ready?

02:20:02.000 There's a thing that girls do with their neck that they only do when they're about to take a selfie.

02:20:06.000 This is it.

02:20:06.000 Ready?

02:20:10.000 It's like, that weird neck movement.

02:20:13.000 Trying to get shit right?

02:20:18.000 That's this weird selfie neck.

02:20:20.000 You don't ever do that any other time.

02:20:22.000 Except for when you're looking at your phone and you're like...

02:20:24.000 You're just trying to get the selfie right?

02:20:27.000 Nothing is more awkward.

02:20:28.000 Nothing is more awkward seeing someone trying to take a selfie.

02:20:31.000 You ever seen that mom at the playground with her kid trying to take selfies? 1.00

02:20:34.000 She takes 40-something selfies.

02:20:36.000 You just do like this, bitch. 1.00

02:20:37.000 Smile.

02:20:37.000 That's what you look like.

02:20:38.000 Okay?

02:20:39.000 You just roll with it.

02:20:40.000 It doesn't always look great.

02:20:41.000 You don't need the perfect angle.

02:20:42.000 You're not tricking people, bud.

02:20:45.000 Filters. 1.00

02:20:49.000 That's how they do it, man.

02:20:50.000 It's this weird chicken movement.

02:20:52.000 Chicken heads! 1.00

02:20:53.000 Chicken heads.

02:20:53.000 Chicken heads, that's where it comes from.

02:20:57.000 Chickens be crazy, man. 1.00

02:20:58.000 It's not where it comes from, but it belongs in it.

02:21:00.000 True.

02:21:01.000 It's in the same umbrella.

02:21:02.000 But that's a real chicken head.

02:21:04.000 Yeah.

02:21:04.000 I mean, this is really...

02:21:05.000 Trust me, I have chickens.

02:21:08.000 This is a fucking chicken head move.

02:21:10.000 That's what they do, man.

02:21:12.000 There's nothing more awkward than seeing someone trying to take fucking selfies.

02:21:16.000 It's so embarrassing.

02:21:18.000 This is definitely more awkward shit.

02:21:19.000 It's more awkward if your friend is taking you and you're a guy.

02:21:23.000 You're standing there like, hold on, bro.

02:21:24.000 Hold on, bro.

02:21:25.000 Oh my god.

02:21:26.000 Hold on, bro.

02:21:27.000 Is it like this?

02:21:28.000 It's so weird.

02:21:29.000 Bro, what do you think?

02:21:29.000 Like this here?

02:21:30.000 Yeah.

02:21:31.000 Is it okay?

02:21:33.000 Get your ass back, bro.

02:21:34.000 If you're a guy and you're poking your ass out, like how many guys take pictures like this?

02:21:38.000 Hey, bro.

02:21:41.000 I'm going to look.

02:21:41.000 Look.

02:21:42.000 I'm mysterious.

02:21:44.000 I'm thinking about this book I'm writing.

02:21:47.000 Ass out.

02:21:49.000 It's so awkward, man.

02:21:52.000 I saw a story about a dude who died because he was getting a dick operation.

02:21:57.000 What?

02:21:58.000 Yeah, he was getting fat pumped into his dick like Kim Kardashian's ass.

02:22:01.000 You're just trying to have a fat dick.

02:22:03.000 Had a fucking heart attack.

02:22:05.000 Fat went through his bloodstream somehow and his body locked up.

02:22:09.000 And that's a wrap!

02:22:10.000 And he was like 32 or some shit.

02:22:12.000 How old is he?

02:22:13.000 30. 30. 30 year old.

02:22:15.000 Relatively healthy person.

02:22:17.000 Wanted a penile elongation and girth enhancement surgery.

02:22:21.000 How?

02:22:21.000 Holla at your boy!

02:22:23.000 Holla at the girth. 0.93

02:22:24.000 Which includes transferring fat from one area of the body and replace...

02:22:29.000 See, he doesn't understand.

02:22:30.000 When we talk about having a fat dick, that doesn't count.

02:22:33.000 That doesn't.

02:22:34.000 You take that literally.

02:22:36.000 You take George Foreman's fists.

02:22:38.000 You're like, man, I wish I had a fist like George Foreman.

02:22:40.000 I'm just going to pump fat in my hair.

02:22:41.000 It looks like Mickey Mouse's gloves.

02:22:43.000 Yeah, no, it doesn't.

02:22:45.000 This guy fucked up, man.

02:22:47.000 He fucked up!

02:22:48.000 Well, he definitely fucked up because now he's dead.

02:22:50.000 He had a pulmonary fat embolism when fat traveled the bloodstream to his lungs and ruptured blood vessels.

02:22:59.000 Christ!

02:23:01.000 First case of a seemingly simple and safe procedure of penis enlargement by autologous fat transfer caused a sudden death of a healthy young man, according to the report.

02:23:12.000 Doctors believe this is the first case.

02:23:14.000 First of all, doctors, fuck you. 0.92

02:23:16.000 Because that sounds like an ad for dick surgery, which you just shouldn't get, okay?

02:23:21.000 Because you don't know what you're doing.

02:23:22.000 You're just making weird, fucked up dicks.

02:23:26.000 You're not making a bigger dick.

02:23:27.000 Yeah, look at that.

02:23:28.000 It's a completely useless procedure.

02:23:30.000 It never works and disfigures, man.

02:23:32.000 What if your dick got fatter, but the head was the same size?

02:23:36.000 Ah, you don't like that.

02:23:37.000 So it's like a big, giant guy with a tiny head.

02:23:39.000 There's this steroid dude, there's pictures of him on the internet, and his head is the size of a softball, and his body is as wide as his table.

02:23:47.000 It's like Beetlejuice.

02:23:48.000 He looks like the henchman from Mario Brothers, the movie, if you remember that.

02:23:52.000 It might be fake, though.

02:23:53.000 It might be one of them photoshopped things.

02:23:55.000 Someone shrugs it.

02:23:56.000 I love that guy.

02:24:01.000 That Beetlejuice movie was fucking outstanding.

02:24:04.000 Classic.

02:24:04.000 What a classic.

02:24:05.000 What a fucking phenomenal movie.

02:24:07.000 It's one of those remakes things that are happening.

02:24:08.000 No.

02:24:09.000 Beetlejuice?

02:24:10.000 I think he's going to be Beetlejuice though, I'm pretty sure.

02:24:13.000 Oh, it's like a sequel?

02:24:15.000 Something.

02:24:16.000 Oh, it'll probably do it.

02:24:17.000 Because he's creepier looking now.

02:24:19.000 Did you see it?

02:24:20.000 Did you see it?

02:24:20.000 No.

02:24:20.000 I heard it's awesome.

02:24:21.000 I heard it's so good.

02:24:21.000 I heard it's really good.

02:24:22.000 Fuck, I need to see it.

02:24:23.000 I need to see it.

02:24:23.000 I love stupid shit like that.

02:24:25.000 Me too.

02:24:25.000 It's exciting to me.

02:24:26.000 Last night people were like, have you seen it?

02:24:28.000 I'm like, best movie ever.

02:24:31.000 Oof, I can't wait, man.

02:24:32.000 I'm in.

02:24:32.000 Me too.

02:24:33.000 I'm all in.

02:24:33.000 Just need to figure it out.

02:24:34.000 I think we need more monster movies.

02:24:36.000 Didn't you say that John Landis' son is remaking American Werewolf in London?

02:24:41.000 They're redoing something.

02:24:43.000 So in the same vein that the Avengers exist now, they're doing the monster world again.

02:24:48.000 Oh, Christ.

02:24:49.000 That's where the mummy is coming from.

02:24:50.000 Oh, like Frankenstein and the mummy are going to hang out together?

02:24:53.000 Dracula and all that.

02:24:53.000 I don't know if they're going to be a fucking fighting team.

02:24:56.000 I love a nice Dracula movie.

02:24:58.000 Origin stories first, and then I'm sure there's going to be a monster mash fight or something.

02:25:01.000 Mommy dropped the ball. 1.00

02:25:02.000 That's not what I asked, though.

02:25:03.000 I'm pretty sure John Landis' son, John Landis, the original director of An American Werewolf in London, my favorite movie of all time.

02:25:10.000 That's your favorite movie of all time?

02:25:11.000 Oh, yeah.

02:25:12.000 Wow.

02:25:12.000 I still watch it to this day.

02:25:14.000 Wow.

02:25:14.000 Which one?

02:25:15.000 First one, the real one, the only one.

02:25:17.000 Came out what year?

02:25:19.000 1910?

02:25:20.000 I don't know.

02:25:22.000 1907?

02:25:23.000 I think I might have been right out of high school.

02:25:26.000 Might have been like 85 or 86. Then there's American Werewolf in London.

02:25:30.000 So he's made comments against the remake that his son is making, is what...

02:25:35.000 Oh, John Landis has made comments against his son's work?

02:25:38.000 What a dick.

02:25:39.000 Six hours ago, there's a clarification of these comments.

02:25:41.000 Hey, how about you keep your mouth shut, Pops?

02:25:43.000 Just let your sun shine.

02:25:44.000 Yeah, let him do his goddamn thing.

02:25:45.000 It's down 17. Yeah, but what if your son was like Eddie Van Halen's son and he just takes over Van Halen?

02:25:52.000 Oh, that'd be a moment.

02:25:52.000 You're like, hey, fuckface.

02:25:54.000 Yeah, that'd be a superpower.

02:25:54.000 You know, he starts singing.

02:25:55.000 He's like, I'm Van Halen, too.

02:25:57.000 No, no, no, you're not.

02:25:58.000 No, whoa, whoa, whoa.

02:25:58.000 But dude, check my last name.

02:26:00.000 Whoa, whoa, whoa.

02:26:00.000 Look at my driver's license.

02:26:01.000 Van Halen.

02:26:02.000 Oh, I can't use the Van Halen name?

02:26:04.000 How about I'm Mike Van Halen?

02:26:06.000 The Mike Van Halen band.

02:26:08.000 Good?

02:26:08.000 That's Mike Van Halen.

02:26:09.000 Can I use that?

02:26:10.000 I'm going to sing Panama.

02:26:11.000 Is that okay?

02:26:11.000 Is that all right?

02:26:13.000 Fuck that.

02:26:15.000 Hot for teacher.

02:26:18.000 They're just at the script process right now.

02:26:20.000 He's writing the script and it might get made, so it's not even that far yet.

02:26:25.000 Why is his dad tweaking?

02:26:26.000 Someone probably asked him.

02:26:28.000 There's a ways to go.

02:26:29.000 Someone wrote a blog about it and it spread.

02:26:31.000 What year was American Werewolf in London made?

02:26:33.000 Let's guess.

02:26:34.000 I want to say 90. I'll say 90. No.

02:26:39.000 87. I'll say 92. I'll say 87. 81. Wow!

02:26:44.000 Way off.

02:26:45.000 But then there's another one, like a more current one, right?

02:26:49.000 Oh yeah, American Werewolf in Paris was terrible.

02:26:50.000 That's what I'm thinking about.

02:26:51.000 But it had that hot French girl. 1.00

02:26:52.000 Yes.

02:26:53.000 Oddly hot.

02:26:53.000 See, when you said that's your favorite movie, I completely judge you because I was based on that because that's why I was so bad.

02:26:59.000 But that girl was in an amazing movie that nobody's ever heard of called Killing Zoe. 0.83

02:27:05.000 It came out right around the time that, see, Pulp Fiction was made by Quentin Tarantino and Roger Avery.

02:27:14.000 A lot of people forgot about Roger Avery.

02:27:16.000 Roger Avery was a brilliant, brilliant screenwriter, really interesting guy, and he went to jail for like a drunk driving accident on the PCH in Malibu, like serious stuff, and he was actually tweeting from jail for a while.

02:27:30.000 Yeah, it was way, way, way back in the day.

02:27:33.000 Yeah, Julie Delpy. 0.91

02:27:35.000 But Roger Avery was tweeting from jail, like really interesting shit.

02:27:40.000 And one of the things that came out of that was that Quentin Tarantino used to have this rant that he did about Top Gun being like really gay.

02:27:48.000 And he did it in some movie, but apparently it's stolen straight up from Roger Avery.

02:27:52.000 Oh, really?

02:27:52.000 He got it from him and just did his bit?

02:27:54.000 Roger Avery had mapped it all out.

02:27:56.000 Oh, fuck.

02:27:57.000 And Tarantino just ganked it.

02:27:58.000 Took it.

02:27:59.000 Yeah, and did it in a movie.

02:28:01.000 Did it in a movie.

02:28:03.000 Damn.

02:28:03.000 Yeah.

02:28:04.000 Yeah, that's the word.

02:28:05.000 But the Roger Avery movie, Killing Zoe, is with that girl, Julie Delpy, and it's excellent.

02:28:10.000 It's really good.

02:28:12.000 It's a crazy, like, drama, crime drama movie.

02:28:16.000 Quentin Tarantino can't miss.

02:28:18.000 Kills it.

02:28:19.000 Kills it.

02:28:21.000 Yeah, it's a bummer, though, when you hear that he stole Roger Avery's Top Gun thing.

02:28:24.000 I would like to hear his story.

02:28:25.000 Maybe Roger Avery says he stole it, but maybe him and Quentin and Roger Avery came up with it together.

02:28:30.000 Maybe they were drunk, going back and forth.

02:28:33.000 Yeah, yeah.

02:28:34.000 And then maybe Quentin just ran, but I know people have done that before.

02:28:37.000 Doug Stanhope has had a problem with that, where he has guys opening with him, and he'll be on the road, they'll go to a diner, Doug will be riffing about something and they will do it on stage the next day because they don't think it's a bit.

02:28:49.000 It's like they're getting in under the wire.

02:28:52.000 Tarantiner and screenwriter Roger Avery, which whom he penned Paul Fisher.

02:28:55.000 That's what I said.

02:28:56.000 No, it says the speech was written by them both.

02:28:58.000 Oh, the speech was originally written.

02:28:59.000 Yeah, but let's see if he says that for a separate feature.

02:29:04.000 While it's compelling, the theory errs on one.

02:29:07.000 Oh, is this the thing about him stealing it?

02:29:09.000 No, this is just about the theory itself.

02:29:11.000 And then this mentions them together writing it.

02:29:14.000 While it's compelling, the theory errs on one key aspect.

02:29:17.000 The duo argue that Top Gun is subversion on a mass level, but Tony Scott did not set out to make Starship Troopers.

02:29:25.000 Much of its homoeroticism was happenstance.

02:29:28.000 Okay.

02:29:29.000 I'm just showing you that they wrote it together here in this article.

02:29:34.000 Right, but find out.

02:29:35.000 If that's true.

02:29:36.000 Find out if that's true.

02:29:37.000 Find out if Roger Avery says Quentin Tarantino stole that idea from him.

02:29:43.000 So Stanhope would be at a restaurant just making people laugh?

02:29:45.000 Hanging out.

02:29:46.000 Riffing.

02:29:47.000 Has a couple cocktails in him.

02:29:48.000 Riffing with his opening acts.

02:29:50.000 This was a long time ago.

02:29:51.000 But he had a real issue with it.

02:29:53.000 And those guys would wind up doing his riffs on stage.

02:29:58.000 Like it was their own.

02:29:58.000 And I don't think he even wanted to say anything to him because he was all pissed off.

02:30:02.000 It was like...

02:30:02.000 Fuck, man.

02:30:03.000 I can't even rant around you guys.

02:30:04.000 Damn.

02:30:05.000 Because that's like unspoken shit.

02:30:07.000 Not even unspoken.

02:30:09.000 It's like, you can't do that.

02:30:10.000 That's stealing.

02:30:12.000 Because those are your original ideas.

02:30:14.000 Yeah, and a guy like Stanhope, rather, that's how he formulates ideas.

02:30:19.000 He bounces them off friends.

02:30:20.000 If he can't bounce them off you because you're just stealing.

02:30:23.000 Steal the shit and his concepts.

02:30:25.000 It does happen, though, you know?

02:30:26.000 Sometimes...

02:30:28.000 Even this day and age, though?

02:30:29.000 Sure.

02:30:29.000 Because you get found out so fast.

02:30:31.000 Yep.

02:30:32.000 Just like Jon Jones.

02:30:33.000 People still do it.

02:30:35.000 People still cheat.

02:30:36.000 They try.

02:30:38.000 You get caught, though.

02:30:39.000 In comedy, if we're all hanging out in the back and you say something funny and then a week goes by and some guy goes up and does the same thing that you said, you're fucked.

02:30:47.000 Comedy's way easier to do that with than, say, cheating with steroids.

02:30:52.000 100%.

02:30:52.000 Different animals.

02:30:54.000 The thing with steroids is you could test it.

02:30:56.000 The thing with comedy is you could say, I thought of it too.

02:30:58.000 And you're like, okay, well, Top Gun does seem gay. 0.95

02:31:01.000 If you think about it, you know?

02:31:03.000 I mean, Val Kilmer's face is all sweaty and smooth-shaven.

02:31:06.000 He's got this, like, gay fuckboy haircut. 0.99

02:31:08.000 Him and Tom Cruise look at each other.

02:31:10.000 Tom Cruise gets mad, rides off on his motorbike because he's dangerous.

02:31:13.000 Dangerous people buttfuck, okay? 1.00

02:31:15.000 Yeah, they do.

02:31:16.000 Buttfuck with that dude with the crazy hair. 1.00

02:31:18.000 He's got a slippery, shiny, smooth face.

02:31:20.000 He comes out of the shower with a towel on.

02:31:22.000 They look in each other's eyes.

02:31:23.000 Play volleyball and shit.

02:31:25.000 I mean, it's not out of the possibilities that you could come up with that, too.

02:31:31.000 If you just watched it, you're like, yo, dude, is it me?

02:31:33.000 Or is this a gay movie?

02:31:36.000 I can totally see you saying that.

02:31:38.000 That seems like a total Brendan Shaw line.

02:31:40.000 And we would be howling and be like, it is gay! 1.00

02:31:42.000 Luke, the woman, what the fuck, what's the woman's name? 1.00

02:31:45.000 I forget the woman who plays his girl, Kelly something, plays his female love interest.

02:31:51.000 She was probably like, what is going on here?

02:31:53.000 How come nobody wants to fuck me?

02:31:54.000 Where's my goddamn sex scene?

02:31:56.000 Who wrote this?

02:31:57.000 The gay boy in the corner wrote this. 0.99

02:31:59.000 Literally, like, that's what it is.

02:32:00.000 Like, he's struggling with his true nature.

02:32:02.000 I mean, that's something that anybody could come up with.

02:32:04.000 But the question is, did Roger Avery come up with it?

02:32:08.000 And did Quentin Tarantino steal it?

02:32:10.000 Because, you know, Quentin Tarantino has been accused before of using the plot lines from a bunch of real classic Japanese movies for his films.

02:32:17.000 Oh, yeah?

02:32:18.000 Yeah, like, um...

02:32:19.000 Like The Hateful Eight and shit?

02:32:21.000 I don't know about that one, but I think that was the thing with Reservoir Dogs.

02:32:27.000 I think Reservoir Dogs was essentially almost like a tribute of a classic Japanese gangster movie.

02:32:33.000 I didn't know that.

02:32:34.000 Yeah.

02:32:35.000 See if that's true.

02:32:36.000 We need like two other people Googling shit.

02:32:38.000 There's so much concepts out there.

02:32:39.000 He's known for that.

02:32:39.000 He takes a lot of whatever influences he'll call it, but it's like Degarek scene stealing or whatever.

02:32:45.000 Right, which is why someone would probably accuse him of doing this with the Roger Avery line.

02:32:49.000 See if you can find Roger Avery tweets from prison.

02:32:54.000 It was fascinating because he was in jail and somehow or another he was able to tweet.

02:32:57.000 I don't know how he was pulling it off, but they found out about it after a while and they canned it.

02:33:01.000 Canned his shit.

02:33:02.000 Well, Twitter's been around how long?

02:33:04.000 Not that long?

02:33:04.000 Seven years?

02:33:06.000 2006. Yeah, 11 years.

02:33:08.000 Shit.

02:33:10.000 And this was the beginning days of Twitter when hardly anybody was using it.

02:33:14.000 Oscar winning Pulp Fiction writer tweets on life in prison.

02:33:17.000 Look at his face there.

02:33:18.000 He looks like pure shit there.

02:33:21.000 January, was that say 2008, for drunk driving.

02:33:25.000 Yeah, so he was quite a few years after it started.

02:33:30.000 Sickness spreads throughout the facility, like bushfires.

02:33:33.000 It was great stuff, man.

02:33:36.000 I remember reading it.

02:33:37.000 It's really interesting stuff.

02:33:39.000 See, you can find it.

02:33:41.000 You wouldn't even think about that, right?

02:33:43.000 Like a sickness spreading through the place like a bushfire.

02:33:47.000 Amazing.

02:33:48.000 Like a poet with his words.

02:33:51.000 Well, he's a brilliant writer.

02:33:52.000 Yeah.

02:33:52.000 And that's why that movie Killing Zoe, which is his movie, What else did he make?

02:33:57.000 Super underrated.

02:33:58.000 Starship Troopers, it said?

02:33:59.000 No, I don't think that was him.

02:34:01.000 I think that was someone else.

02:34:02.000 They were just talking about the homo eroticism. 1.00

02:34:04.000 Oh, gotcha.

02:34:05.000 Versus Quentin Tarantino's...

02:34:06.000 Rules of Attraction, I think, was the one big one he made, too.

02:34:09.000 Do you remember that?

02:34:09.000 Yeah.

02:34:10.000 Bunch of fucked up shit happening in that movie.

02:34:12.000 He's got a weird mind, for sure.

02:34:14.000 Gonna have to be.

02:34:18.000 That's right, Beowulf.

02:34:19.000 That was a crazy movie, man.

02:34:21.000 You're watching a live video game.

02:34:23.000 Oh yeah, Beowulf is weird.

02:34:25.000 Oh, Silent Hill, alright.

02:34:26.000 Yeah, Beowulf is like, they did it CGI, but not realistic.

02:34:31.000 Remember that?

02:34:32.000 Well, because it started off as a video game, right?

02:34:34.000 No!

02:34:35.000 It started off as a fable.

02:34:37.000 It's an old, old, old story.

02:34:40.000 And they used, uh, back when...

02:34:43.000 Angelina Jolie is hot. 1.00

02:34:47.000 That's when she hypnotized Brad Pitt.

02:34:50.000 Got him to start drinking.

02:34:52.000 Adopting random cats and shit.

02:34:53.000 She cracked that dude. 1.00

02:34:55.000 She cracks them all.

02:34:56.000 That's a black widow right there, boy. 1.00

02:34:58.000 Billy Bob Thornton had Billy Bob Thornton wearing her blood around her neck and shit. 1.00

02:35:04.000 They were both wearing each other's blood.

02:35:05.000 Crazy.

02:35:05.000 Yeah, she was wrecking them back then.

02:35:07.000 It was just too powerful an attraction.

02:35:09.000 Those lips, too.

02:35:10.000 Yeah, that I did.

02:35:10.000 Out of the world.

02:35:11.000 Out of the world.

02:35:13.000 That movie was weird.

02:35:15.000 Yeah.

02:35:15.000 I didn't know she was the tiger and panda.

02:35:18.000 Now you know.

02:35:18.000 Killing the game.

02:35:20.000 Yeah, but it's, um, that Beowulf movie was fun, because it was, like, animated, but, like, they used people's faces, so it was, like, kind of close, but you knew it wasn't real.

02:35:29.000 It was real weird.

02:35:30.000 I don't know if you could pull that off today.

02:35:32.000 You could.

02:35:33.000 It was good.

02:35:33.000 Yeah, it was a fun movie.

02:35:35.000 It was good.

02:35:35.000 Like, that movie?

02:35:36.000 Well, I guess Avatar's a little bit of that.

02:35:38.000 Nah, because Avatar, the people look like people.

02:35:41.000 In this movie, nobody looks like a person.

02:35:42.000 Yeah, but the avatars do look like aliens, but they still have the same kind of concepts.

02:35:48.000 CGI quality.

02:35:49.000 Yeah, you can tell it's the actor.

02:35:51.000 Yeah, that's true.

02:35:52.000 But it looks a lot better than this shit.

02:35:54.000 Way better.

02:35:54.000 But that's also because it's not a person.

02:35:56.000 See, that's the sneaky trick about CGI, is that CGI works best on something that's not real.

02:36:02.000 Because we have nothing to base it off of.

02:36:04.000 Exactly.

02:36:04.000 Yeah.

02:36:05.000 That's why CGI is so bad with animals. 0.91

02:36:08.000 Like when you see like those wolves in the Game of Thrones, like that's not really there.

02:36:12.000 Although Jungle Book said, what up?

02:36:14.000 It's not bad.

02:36:15.000 Pretty good.

02:36:16.000 Pretty fucking good.

02:36:16.000 It's getting way better for sure.

02:36:17.000 Way better.

02:36:18.000 It's like, it's at the edge of what they call the Uncanny Valley.

02:36:21.000 You know what the Uncanny Valley is?

02:36:23.000 It's like the gap between something that looks hyper-realistic and something that looks totally fake.

02:36:28.000 Yeah.

02:36:29.000 It's like you get to this point where like, wow, almost.

02:36:31.000 It's real close.

02:36:32.000 And then you can't tell.

02:36:36.000 I wish I could stop clearing my throat.

02:36:37.000 Try not to, folks.

02:36:39.000 You're getting mad.

02:36:39.000 No, it's the weed.

02:36:40.000 Smoked weed before this podcast.

02:36:42.000 I'll take that throat problem over shitting my pants right now.

02:36:46.000 I'm worried for that slingshot.

02:36:49.000 I'll just light that bathroom up one more time before you leave.

02:36:53.000 You don't want to get on that PCH and start spraying people behind you when that ocean wind hits you.

02:37:06.000 It's fucking trouble.

02:37:07.000 Imagine you're driving in your car and just shit splatters on your windshield.

02:37:11.000 Bro, you shit on my Porsche.

02:37:13.000 What in the fuck?

02:37:13.000 You shit on my fucking Porsche.

02:37:15.000 We have problems.

02:37:16.000 If you were in that slingshot, and there's diarrhea just flying out of your ass, and maybe you have beaver fever.

02:37:23.000 You know what beaver fever is?

02:37:27.000 Beaver fever is when people drink water.

02:37:30.000 They get out of the ground, like a creek water.

02:37:33.000 You get giardia.

02:37:34.000 It's from beavers shitting in the water.

02:37:37.000 Like, literally, you're getting bacteria.

02:37:39.000 Giardia literally comes from animal shit.

02:37:41.000 Well, I got beaver fever from this coffee.

02:37:43.000 But when you get it, you're, like, hurt, and you're like...

02:37:45.000 Not doing well.

02:37:46.000 I'm trying to be cool.

02:37:47.000 Trying to put on my happy face.

02:37:49.000 But you look like you have plenty of energy.

02:37:51.000 Yeah, I feel alright.

02:37:52.000 I'm a good actor.

02:37:54.000 I feel like in any given point I could shit my pants.

02:37:57.000 I just can't believe you haven't shit your pants before.

02:37:59.000 Ever?

02:38:00.000 Maybe when I was a kid.

02:38:01.000 Man, one time I was coming home.

02:38:02.000 Or maybe in here just now.

02:38:05.000 I was coming home from Fear Factor once and I filled my pants up like one of them Glad Hefty bags like a construction worker would use.

02:38:14.000 He'd throw cement in there or something.

02:38:17.000 I just couldn't hold it in.

02:38:18.000 I was like, Jesus!

02:38:20.000 Jesus!

02:38:21.000 Oh no!

02:38:23.000 It was just epic.

02:38:26.000 Why?

02:38:27.000 What car were you in?

02:38:30.000 I don't remember.

02:38:32.000 Did you shit your Supra?

02:38:33.000 No, it was past that.

02:38:35.000 The Supra I had in 95 or something.

02:38:39.000 You just let these logs get over?

02:38:42.000 I didn't want to.

02:38:43.000 I don't remember the exact specifics, but I do absolutely remember filling my underwear with shit.

02:38:50.000 In my car going, fuck!

02:38:53.000 I just couldn't, maybe I was stuck in traffic.

02:38:56.000 I don't remember the specifics, but I for sure shit my pants.

02:39:00.000 It must have been so bad for you to go, fuck it!

02:39:04.000 It was no, I didn't have a, there was no argument on my part.

02:39:08.000 I really didn't have the willpower.

02:39:10.000 There was nothing there that could stop this from taking place.

02:39:14.000 It was just gonna take place.

02:39:15.000 This levels to everything, bro.

02:39:17.000 This levels to diarrhea.

02:39:19.000 I agree, man.

02:39:20.000 There's certain levels of diarrhea where, like, listen, I don't care how much sphincter workouts you've been doing.

02:39:25.000 It doesn't matter.

02:39:27.000 Yeah.

02:39:27.000 Yeah, when that thing's coming.

02:39:29.000 Do you think, I would imagine, like, your butt is probably, you could really, like, you know how girls do, like, Kegel exercises? 1.00

02:39:36.000 Kegel exercises, to me, it's like, man, who's got that, is that muscle even developed?

02:39:40.000 Like, you're on a long road ahead of you, tightening that bad bitch up. 1.00

02:39:44.000 Yeah, yeah.

02:39:44.000 I don't know if it's possible.

02:39:45.000 Sit there!

02:39:46.000 It is!

02:39:47.000 Like, Russian chicks can carry weights with them. 1.00

02:39:48.000 There's a woman from Russia that has, like...

02:39:51.000 They can do it.

02:39:51.000 She has, like, the world record.

02:39:53.000 She's like 70 kilos with her pussy. 1.00

02:39:55.000 Jesus Christ.

02:39:56.000 She clamps down.

02:39:56.000 They put, like, a golf ball on the end of a rope and attach it to a kettlebell.

02:39:59.000 I bet there's some gay boys who can carry some shit. 1.00

02:40:01.000 And this bitch stuffs that golf ball in her pussy and just... 1.00

02:40:03.000 Clamps it down.

02:40:06.000 Carries that weight around.

02:40:09.000 I don't want that.

02:40:10.000 But your butt would be way easier to clamp down. 1.00

02:40:13.000 But I don't care who you are.

02:40:14.000 If you had the diarrhea I had that day, it's coming out.

02:40:17.000 I'm telling you right now, if you get a metro brew with extra shots, you go and sizzle in your pants.

02:40:23.000 How to do butt kegels.

02:40:24.000 There we go.

02:40:26.000 Here we go.

02:40:28.000 What's the website we're dealing with here?

02:40:30.000 Luxury spot.

02:40:31.000 Luxury spot.

02:40:32.000 Is it a girl website?

02:40:33.000 Probably.

02:40:34.000 Butt kegels.

02:40:36.000 What they are and how to do them.

02:40:38.000 Get larger, please.

02:40:39.000 Let me read this.

02:40:40.000 No, no, no.

02:40:41.000 Larger.

02:40:42.000 Yeah, there we go.

02:40:42.000 Why do butt kegels?

02:40:44.000 Kegels are designed to tighten the...

02:40:46.000 Wow.

02:40:47.000 Look at this word.

02:40:49.000 P-U-B-O-C-O-C-C-Y-G-E-U-S. Pugokake. 1.00

02:40:59.000 Pupococcus muscles.

02:41:01.000 Your asshole!

02:41:03.000 The PC muscles are used for two things.

02:41:06.000 Clenching your anus and controlling the flow of urine. 0.99

02:41:09.000 Anytime you stop yourself midstream at the urinal, these are the PC muscles at work.

02:41:15.000 Well, my shit's working overtime right now.

02:41:17.000 My anus clenching skills, I'm like Cain Velasquez.

02:41:22.000 Like, I have stamina.

02:41:24.000 Women with strong PC muscles tend to have tighter, stronger vaginas, which often means stronger contractions during orgasms. 1.00

02:41:32.000 If you know anything about orgasms, you know that stronger is always better.

02:41:36.000 All caps.

02:41:38.000 If you know anything about orgasms.

02:41:40.000 That's not a very technical way to write.

02:41:42.000 Men, on the other hand...

02:41:44.000 Use the PC muscles to stop their urine mid-flow, but also to stop urine from coming out in the first place.

02:41:51.000 When you feel the need to use the bathroom, but have to hold it thanks to a long line, those are the PC muscles doing the work.

02:41:58.000 So you're clenching your PC muscles so you can stop your flow of piss.

02:42:03.000 Or you're tightening up your asshole. 0.84

02:42:06.000 Or you will be able to clench to stop gas from passing through your anus, to hold your waist until you reach a toilet, and even to eliminate waste more efficiently. 0.63

02:42:15.000 You'd be surprised, bitch. 1.00

02:42:16.000 And be better at getting buttfucked. 0.99

02:42:18.000 Buttfucked. 1.00

02:42:18.000 That too. 1.00

02:42:18.000 Really tightened down on the dick. 1.00

02:42:19.000 How about, why did he leave that out of there?

02:42:21.000 You're talking about kegels.

02:42:22.000 But Kegels is an exercise that they use for tightening your vagina to enhance intercourse. 1.00

02:42:28.000 So you're calling it Kegels, and you're saying, I'm doing it to stop shitting myself?

02:42:32.000 How often is this taking place?

02:42:33.000 Maybe you should reconsider your diet before you sit around like an asshole just clenching your butt all day.

02:42:38.000 Well, I wish I did those exercises last night.

02:42:41.000 Well, no, then you'd be fatigued.

02:42:43.000 You want to do them like two weeks ago.

02:42:44.000 You want to start it out.

02:42:45.000 You got to peak at the right time.

02:42:47.000 I didn't expect this, though.

02:42:48.000 Got to build up.

02:42:50.000 I did my run today, and I went harder and stronger than I've ever done it before.

02:42:55.000 I still suck at it.

02:42:56.000 Long distance?

02:42:57.000 It's all hills.

02:42:59.000 You know, I'm doing two miles in these very steep hills.

02:43:02.000 Beastie.

02:43:02.000 But I can do it longer.

02:43:04.000 I know I suck at it still, but when you know that you're making just a little bit of progress, just a little bit of progress, you know?

02:43:11.000 That's the same thing with butt kegels. 1.00

02:43:13.000 I've been running for a long time.

02:43:19.000 Still running with those vibrant shoes?

02:43:21.000 Not today.

02:43:22.000 Today I didn't because I've been hunting with these things.

02:43:25.000 These Solomons.

02:43:26.000 Don't I have laces on them?

02:43:27.000 No.

02:43:27.000 Like Velcro for kids?

02:43:29.000 They pull tight with like a cord and then it slides down.

02:43:32.000 The cord tucks into the mouth of your shoe.

02:43:34.000 Very easy to tighten up when you're in the field.

02:43:36.000 Makes sense.

02:43:36.000 Out there in the field.

02:43:37.000 You don't have time to tie your shoe.

02:43:38.000 But I like the Vibram five fingers better, but I wanted to get a real hard run in today.

02:43:44.000 And I have to be more careful where I step when I wear those five finger shoes.

02:43:49.000 I can just go reckless, hard, full out with these things on.

02:43:53.000 I'll step anywhere.

02:43:53.000 It doesn't matter.

02:43:54.000 So you can get a better workout.

02:43:55.000 Yeah, because with the Vibrams, if I hit a sharp rock, I'm kind of fucked.

02:43:58.000 With this, I'm not even feeling that shit.

02:44:00.000 With these things, I can run over pretty much anything.

02:44:03.000 But I think for controlling...

02:44:06.000 What's up?

02:44:07.000 So close to shit in my pants.

02:44:09.000 Just go, we'll wrap it up.

02:44:11.000 We'll wrap it up.

02:44:12.000 It's almost 2 o'clock.

02:44:13.000 I know, we got this.

02:44:14.000 I want to fuck with my sphinx or muscles or whatever.

02:44:18.000 Keep it together.

02:44:20.000 Your face is amazing.

02:44:21.000 Self-discipline.

02:44:22.000 This is your face.

02:44:22.000 Ready?

02:44:23.000 Here's you.

02:44:29.000 You know what you like?

02:44:29.000 You know what your face looks like?

02:44:31.000 You ever do that teacup ride at Disney?

02:44:33.000 When you do that thing and you're spinning and you're kind of going too fast.

02:44:35.000 You're like...

02:44:39.000 Me?

02:44:40.000 I don't want to be the first guy to shit his pants on the podcast.

02:44:43.000 Me and Cam Haynes and our kids got in one of them teacup things, and with me and him going full clip, I mean full clip.

02:44:52.000 I don't know there's a limitation on how fast those things go, but it ain't getting any faster.

02:44:57.000 Anyway, we got it.

02:44:58.000 It was so ridiculous.

02:44:59.000 We were spinning so fast.

02:45:00.000 Did you guys feel sick?

02:45:01.000 Oh, totally sick.

02:45:03.000 Dude, my youngest, my seven-year-old is fucking nuts.

02:45:06.000 She loves to go on those things fast. 0.98

02:45:09.000 Like, there's a carousel at the mall that's actually way faster than the one at Disneyland.

02:45:13.000 Really?

02:45:13.000 Yeah, they have a teacup thing on there.

02:45:15.000 And you go right down the street, the Panga Mall.

02:45:17.000 You grab that fucking steering wheel and start whipping around.

02:45:21.000 It goes so fast.

02:45:23.000 Your head is like, you're holding your, you have to use all your muscles to keep your head from just bending over.

02:45:28.000 That's what you look like right here.

02:45:29.000 You're like, that's like...

02:45:30.000 It's the same thing.

02:45:31.000 It's like you're on a teacup.

02:45:33.000 I really regret driving that slingshot.

02:45:35.000 Like spitting.

02:45:36.000 Dude, just stick your asshole up in the air when you get on the highway.

02:45:41.000 When you come over the crest of the 405 and you get that big long hill, just pull your pants down, lift your ass in the air, and just...

02:45:51.000 No, son, I'm taking Topanga Canyon so no one sees me shit that slingshot out.

02:45:55.000 Callan has a great story about being with a girl once, like many, many moons ago, and he was going on a hike with her and he had a shit, and so he came up with something like, hold on, I'm ready, I hear something, and he made a game out of it that he ran and shit,

02:46:11.000 and she thought it was really funny, you know, and she's like, what are you doing?

02:46:15.000 He's like, nothing, I heard something.

02:46:16.000 No big deal.

02:46:17.000 I'm just making sure that we're safe.

02:46:19.000 And then they kept hiking and he's like, oh my god, I have to shit again.

02:46:22.000 And then he ran away again.

02:46:24.000 And she's like, what are you doing?

02:46:25.000 And then she realized he was shitting.

02:46:26.000 She's like, oh no! 0.95

02:46:29.000 Oh no!

02:46:30.000 Sorry!

02:46:32.000 He's just out there in the woods.

02:46:34.000 There's nothing he can do.

02:46:36.000 He's shitting himself.

02:46:36.000 There's just nothing he can do.

02:46:39.000 It's a fucking animal, man.

02:46:41.000 It is life.

02:46:42.000 It is life.

02:46:43.000 It's a weird thing, man.

02:46:43.000 Like, you know, like the inefficiency of the body.

02:46:47.000 Like, breaking everything down, but not this stuff.

02:46:49.000 Get it out of here.

02:46:50.000 Your body's like, this is not good, man.

02:46:52.000 Get it out of here now.

02:46:53.000 I wonder if, like...

02:46:54.000 It's like hot lava.

02:46:55.000 That's a good...

02:46:56.000 Is that a good...

02:46:58.000 Design?

02:46:59.000 Like, is there any animal?

02:47:00.000 Is there any animal, like, or plant?

02:47:02.000 Does a plant do that?

02:47:03.000 Like, the plant takes things in, but the plant doesn't shit anything out, right?

02:47:07.000 Plant gets rid of waste.

02:47:08.000 Does it?

02:47:09.000 It gets rid of oxygen.

02:47:11.000 It processes carbon dioxide and turns it into oxygen.

02:47:15.000 But it's not waste.

02:47:17.000 That's like us.

02:47:18.000 We breathe out carbon dioxide.

02:47:19.000 I wouldn't necessarily say it's waste.

02:47:20.000 It's just we're transferring.

02:47:22.000 But if that carbon dioxide was in your body, you'd die, right?

02:47:26.000 So we're getting rid of it.

02:47:27.000 No.

02:47:27.000 No, it doesn't kill you.

02:47:28.000 Obviously, you're making it.

02:47:30.000 You're pushing it out.

02:47:31.000 You just don't want to have too much of it and get sick.

02:47:34.000 But do you know that the air is not really mostly oxygen?

02:47:38.000 Do you know what most of the air is?

02:47:41.000 Nitrogen.

02:47:42.000 Nitrogen.

02:47:43.000 Like a massive percentage of it.

02:47:44.000 I think it's in like the high 80s, right?

02:47:46.000 I want to say 68%, something like that.

02:47:48.000 Let's find out.

02:47:49.000 But the plant just turns it into carbon dioxide.

02:47:51.000 That's it.

02:47:52.000 That's all they do.

02:47:53.000 That's amazing.

02:47:54.000 So what they're getting out of the water and out of the soil, they figure out a way to use.

02:48:00.000 But what percentage of the air is nitrogen?

02:48:03.000 I really want to say it's in the 80s.

02:48:05.000 But I don't know.

02:48:06.000 I'm just making it up.

02:48:08.000 You know, they pull nitrogen out of the air and use it for fertilizer.

02:48:12.000 78%.

02:48:12.000 Goddamn, that's high.

02:48:14.000 It's a lot.

02:48:14.000 It's mostly nitrogen.

02:48:16.000 21% oxygen.

02:48:17.000 That's crazy.

02:48:18.000 You would think the air is mostly oxygen and carbon dioxide.

02:48:21.000 For sure.

02:48:21.000 That's what we taught in school.

02:48:23.000 But all the other animals, living organisms, maybe besides plants, release the waste, same as we do.

02:48:29.000 Yeah.

02:48:29.000 Every other mammal, fish, they all do it.

02:48:32.000 You know what's crazy is that there's nitrogen around us all the time and a dude figured out how to extract that nitrogen out of the air and use it for fertilizer and that's why there's so many people on the earth today.

02:48:45.000 There's a guy named Fritz Haber and he made something called the Haber method of extracting nitrogen.

02:48:49.000 He did it like in World War I. He's a genius.

02:48:52.000 He also created Zyklon A, which is the shit that they use.

02:48:56.000 Agent A? No, the stuff that they gassed the Jews with. 0.94

02:49:00.000 Oh, fuck.

02:49:01.000 But he didn't mean to make it, right?

02:49:03.000 No.

02:49:04.000 He made Zyklon A, which had a scent to it.

02:49:09.000 So you could tell when it was there to get away from it.

02:49:11.000 They removed the scent and created Zyklon B. And that's what they used to gas the Jews in the gas chambers. 0.94

02:49:17.000 Crazy.

02:49:17.000 And he was Jewish, which is even more fucked up.

02:49:20.000 So he was there during World War I. And then when World War II was happening, that's when he had to leave Germany and wound up dying and having a heart attack.

02:49:28.000 Yeah, it was crazy shit, man.

02:49:30.000 He was also...

02:49:31.000 This was like the nuttiest thing about Haber.

02:49:35.000 At the time, he was receiving the Nobel Prize for creating the Haber method of extracting nitrogen out of the atmosphere.

02:49:42.000 Rightfully so.

02:49:43.000 He also was wanted for crimes against humanity because he was gassing the British and Canadian, I think it was, troops when they first started.

02:49:54.000 He was the first guy that initiated a gas attack.

02:49:57.000 Jesus Christ.

02:49:58.000 Crazy.

02:49:59.000 So this guy that's responsible, the nitrogen from the Haber method is responsible for some insane percentage of the nitrogen that's in people's bodies that comes from food.

02:50:10.000 Like they think it's something around like half.

02:50:13.000 Like half of the nitrogen that you have in your body from food was a direct result of them extracting it out of the air with the Haber method.

02:50:20.000 Which is like, what?

02:50:21.000 And this is the same guy.

02:50:24.000 That was gassing allied forces.

02:50:27.000 And this is the same guy that created this Zyklon A, which eventually became Zyklon B that they used to gas the Jews. 0.94

02:50:32.000 Brilliant dude.

02:50:33.000 Brilliant dude, but nuts.

02:50:35.000 His wife apparently shot herself in front of him because she disagreed with who knows what the whole thing was, but what he was doing and he was off to war and all this thing.

02:50:45.000 So in front of him, he shot herself.

02:50:47.000 He left his dying wife with his 13-year-old son and said, see, gotta go to war.

02:50:53.000 Oh, he's a terrible person.

02:50:54.000 Who knows?

02:50:55.000 Brilliant, but terrible.

02:50:56.000 Who knows what the actual circumstances were?

02:50:59.000 I guess you'd have to get all the variables of why he left.

02:51:03.000 The son might have had other people to watch out for him.

02:51:05.000 He had no option other than to leave.

02:51:08.000 You could drop him off at a friend's house, for God's sakes.

02:51:11.000 I don't know if the kid was with somebody or not, is my point.

02:51:14.000 But that's the story behind it.

02:51:16.000 This one brilliant guy that figured out a way to extract nitrogen became this fucking creator of a monster.

02:51:24.000 Yeah, but also the reason why, I mean, maybe somebody would have figured it out eventually, but he's the reason why they were able to do that during World War I. Don't you think someone would have eventually came along and figured it out?

02:51:34.000 Yeah.

02:51:36.000 Most of that stuff.

02:51:36.000 I think with most things.

02:51:38.000 With most things.

02:51:38.000 I think that was the case with the invention of a light bulb.

02:51:41.000 I think there was a bunch of people that were working on it at the same time.

02:51:43.000 And the invention of...

02:51:44.000 I think the telephone was the same thing.

02:51:46.000 Radio was the same thing.

02:51:47.000 There's always like...

02:51:50.000 Almost inventions, like we were talking about that chip that sort of rewires your DNA. There's always these inventions that open up the possibility of other inventions.

02:51:58.000 And then the technology that allows for an invention like that gets analyzed by a bunch of different people.

02:52:04.000 It's always one of those things where...

02:52:07.000 Anytime something happens today, there's a network.

02:52:10.000 It's very rare that one person figures one thing out that nobody ever saw before.

02:52:14.000 It's like there's a network of inventions and innovations at all sides.

02:52:18.000 Yeah, because you need machines and computers and all these different things that other people have created that allow you to do the calculations to invent something new.

02:52:25.000 So all it feeds off of all of it.

02:52:27.000 And then isn't it the best kind of, sometimes, the best marketer, best talker, they get the notoriety for it sometimes?

02:52:32.000 Sometimes, yeah.

02:52:33.000 Sometimes.

02:52:34.000 Just like fighting, right?

02:52:36.000 Mm-hmm.

02:52:37.000 I'm coming for a full circle.

02:52:40.000 So, before we end this, Canelo or Gennady Golovkin?

02:52:44.000 Oh my god, what a fucking fight.

02:52:46.000 Well, your lady is Mexican, so you gotta root for Canelo, otherwise you'd be ostracized. 1.00

02:52:51.000 And they're from the same hometown, Guadalajara.

02:52:52.000 They'll kick you the fuck out.

02:52:53.000 I'm rooting for Canelo.

02:52:56.000 I'm rooting for a good performance, Brendan Schaaf, because that's what I do.

02:53:00.000 That's what you do.

02:53:01.000 I do.

02:53:01.000 I have to.

02:53:02.000 Not in this case.

02:53:04.000 Yep.

02:53:04.000 Why?

02:53:05.000 Because I want to see what happens.

02:53:07.000 I want to see what happens.

02:53:08.000 I don't have, like, a guy I want to win.

02:53:10.000 Like, if Triple G wins, I'm not going to be bummed out.

02:53:12.000 No, I just want a good fight.

02:53:14.000 Exactly.

02:53:14.000 I want to see what happens.

02:53:15.000 But I'm that guy.

02:53:16.000 I don't want to see either guy lose.

02:53:18.000 Like, I like both of them.

02:53:19.000 I'm like, fuck, I don't want any guy to lose.

02:53:21.000 I don't want anyone to have that L. Put that weigh-in today, too. 0.99

02:53:25.000 Oh, yeah, would that little kid punch that guy in the dick? 0.99

02:53:27.000 That's his son.

02:53:28.000 Punch that guy in the dick. 1.00

02:53:30.000 Billy Joe Saunders.

02:53:31.000 He's a great follower.

02:53:32.000 Why is this little kid on the fucking stage?

02:53:35.000 Look, he gets on the scale.

02:53:37.000 He gets on the scale.

02:53:38.000 And the guy's like, no, don't do that, dude.

02:53:40.000 Sam, look at this.

02:53:41.000 He's flexing.

02:53:43.000 The kid's on the scale.

02:53:44.000 And he's just like, what's up, little man?

02:53:46.000 And he punched him.

02:53:47.000 And he kicked him.

02:53:50.000 That's so fucked up.

02:53:54.000 It's such a bad look.

02:53:55.000 Well, it's so stupid that they let that little kid be there.

02:53:58.000 What if he punched that kid right in the face?

02:54:01.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00

02:54:01.000 At least slap him. 1.00

02:54:02.000 What if he kicked him?

02:54:03.000 Be good to go.

02:54:05.000 Tie boxing him right in the face.

02:54:07.000 Not to throw up.

02:54:08.000 I don't know what's going on.

02:54:10.000 Next time, the lady at Starbucks says, don't put two extra shots.

02:54:14.000 She's fucking right.

02:54:15.000 Yeah, you can't add extra shots to a caveman nitro, unless you're Tate Fletcher.

02:54:19.000 Tate Fletcher can consume.

02:54:20.000 He can throw that caveman nitro down like it's water.

02:54:23.000 Let's just wrap this up before you shit yourself.

02:54:25.000 I'm gonna throw up and shit myself.

02:54:26.000 Okay.

02:54:27.000 What do you think's going on here?

02:54:28.000 Not good.

02:54:29.000 This is my prediction.

02:54:30.000 I think if Triple G doesn't stop him, Canelo wins in a decision, the public's piss.

02:54:34.000 Because you gotta look at the politics of it.

02:54:36.000 Golden Boy.

02:54:36.000 What?

02:54:37.000 And Canelo's the headliner.

02:54:38.000 Wait a minute.

02:54:38.000 You're saying if Triple G... Hold the music, please.

02:54:41.000 You're saying if Triple G outboxes him, he won't get the decision?

02:54:46.000 Box him for you.

02:54:47.000 I think you would.

02:54:49.000 Because I think it sets up the rematch.

02:54:50.000 I think you get a rematch no matter what, even if it gives a decision.

02:54:53.000 As long as no one gets stopped.

02:54:54.000 So you really think that if Triple G puts on a show and outboxes Canelo, he'll get robbed?

02:54:58.000 You'd have to outclass him for like 10 rounds, which I don't think you will.

02:55:01.000 I think if it's even close, like let's say it's like 7-6, something crazy, you know?

02:55:07.000 Yeah.

02:55:08.000 My concern with...

02:55:11.000 Canelo is that he might not have the endurance for a prolonged firefight.

02:55:16.000 And you think Triple G does?

02:55:18.000 Because he did it against Jacobs.

02:55:20.000 You got pretty tight against Jacobs.

02:55:22.000 Yeah, but that was a goddamn firefight as well.

02:55:24.000 Completely different fight.

02:55:25.000 It was a very good fight.

02:55:27.000 Some people don't think he won the fight.

02:55:27.000 You don't think he won that fight?

02:55:28.000 It's close.

02:55:29.000 Oh, I thought he won the fight.

02:55:31.000 I'd give it to him.

02:55:31.000 It was a very good fight.

02:55:32.000 It was fucking close.

02:55:32.000 Yeah.

02:55:33.000 Jacobs, completely different fight than Canelo.

02:55:35.000 Jacobs can move.

02:55:35.000 I actually just watched that the other day.

02:55:36.000 Great fight.

02:55:37.000 I forgot how good it was.

02:55:38.000 Jacobs is a motherfucker.

02:55:39.000 I had to clear some space on my DVR, so I was deleting some boxing matches.

02:55:42.000 I know how that goes.

02:55:43.000 You know how that goes.

02:55:43.000 You get to a certain thing, you're like, why do I have 100 Ted Nugent Spirit of the Wild saved?

02:55:48.000 Yeah.

02:55:49.000 Yeah.

02:55:50.000 Yeah, you have to shove bullshit in there.

02:55:53.000 So I got to that fight and I said, ooh, let me watch this again because this Triple G fight's coming up this weekend.

02:55:57.000 That was like...

02:55:58.000 Jacobs can fight his ass off.

02:56:00.000 That was a great fight.

02:56:01.000 Toughest fight for Triple G. Everyone's like, oh, he's over the hill.

02:56:03.000 I'm like, no, Jacobs is just a monster.

02:56:06.000 And completely different fight than Canelo.

02:56:09.000 His footwork.

02:56:09.000 It makes me wish Terrence Crawford was just a little bigger.

02:56:12.000 I know.

02:56:13.000 You know, because he's about 45 now.

02:56:15.000 He'll go up to 47. He wants to fight Pacquiao.

02:56:18.000 Yeah.

02:56:19.000 And I wish he was like 160, you know?

02:56:21.000 Me too.

02:56:22.000 Because he's a thin fella.

02:56:23.000 Small.

02:56:24.000 I think part of his style is he's built perfect for the way he fights.

02:56:29.000 Yeah.

02:56:29.000 Amazing.

02:56:30.000 He's got perfect endurance.

02:56:31.000 If you put more weight on him, he'd probably be weighed down a little.

02:56:34.000 It'll slow him down.

02:56:36.000 He's definitely in his zone.

02:56:38.000 40, 47. That's the right weight class.

02:56:40.000 Boxen's having a killer year, man.

02:56:42.000 It is.

02:56:42.000 Now they have Anthony Joshua.

02:56:43.000 He's fighting.

02:56:45.000 And then you have...

02:56:45.000 Legit Goliath heavyweight champion built like a statue.

02:56:48.000 Looks like a Greek god.

02:56:50.000 Yeah.

02:56:50.000 And then you also have...

02:56:51.000 And really well-spoken, super polite...

02:56:54.000 Under-armor athlete.

02:56:55.000 British guy.

02:56:56.000 Yep.

02:56:56.000 Yeah.

02:56:56.000 And then you got Wilder, Deontay Wilder, fighting fucking, what's his name?

02:57:02.000 The fucking Cuban killer. 1.00

02:57:05.000 Oh yeah, King Kong.

02:57:06.000 Yes.

02:57:07.000 He's fighting him?

02:57:08.000 Yeah.

02:57:08.000 I think it's a rough fight for Wilder.

02:57:11.000 I think it's a bad idea.

02:57:12.000 Then the winners of each of those will fight.

02:57:16.000 It's a good time for boxing, but tomorrow's the big one.

02:57:18.000 Tomorrow's the big one.

02:57:19.000 Tomorrow really shows who the superstar in boxing is.

02:57:22.000 Because Lomachenko, I think, is one of the most skillful guys ever.

02:57:26.000 But he's not being challenged.

02:57:27.000 He's not a draw.

02:57:29.000 Well, there's also not a guy in his division that stands out as being the guy he has to fight.

02:57:32.000 He's like Mighty Mouse.

02:57:33.000 Yeah.

02:57:34.000 Whereas, like...

02:57:35.000 Canelo and Triple G is the fight that everybody's wanted to see for a while.

02:57:38.000 I think you're going to get a trilogy from that.

02:57:40.000 Who knows?

02:57:41.000 Who knows how it plays out?

02:57:42.000 I can't wait though.

02:57:44.000 Yeah, I wonder.

02:57:44.000 I really wonder what's going to happen.

02:57:46.000 I'm super fascinated.

02:57:47.000 Me too.

02:57:49.000 And then you also have, what do you think about David Branch versus Luke Rockhold tomorrow?

02:57:53.000 I haven't seen it myself.

02:57:55.000 People are like, hey, have you seen Rockhold at Wayne's?

02:57:57.000 Doesn't look the same.

02:57:59.000 What Wayne's?

02:58:00.000 They had Wayne's yesterday.

02:58:02.000 Oh, yesterday at weigh-ins.

02:58:04.000 When you're saying, at weigh-ins, I was thinking, like, other weigh-ins?

02:58:07.000 Like, what weigh-ins?

02:58:08.000 Oh, I hear you.

02:58:09.000 I forgot that it's today.

02:58:10.000 Yeah.

02:58:10.000 The weigh-ins today.

02:58:11.000 The fight's tomorrow.

02:58:12.000 The weigh-ins were today, yeah.

02:58:13.000 Yeah.

02:58:14.000 And people were complaining about it.

02:58:16.000 Let's see.

02:58:16.000 Try to get a picture of Luke Rockhold from today's weigh-in.

02:58:19.000 Yeah.

02:58:20.000 I mean, Luke's a...

02:58:21.000 You could argue he's the best middleweight in the world.

02:58:24.000 You know, he had that rough...

02:58:24.000 How can you argue with that if Michael Bisping knocked him out?

02:58:27.000 We...

02:58:28.000 Hear me out, dude.

02:58:29.000 You could say he's not, because Michael Bisping's the real champ, but he got caught by Bisping, right?

02:58:34.000 But before that, Luke Rockhold's a motherfucker.

02:58:37.000 Hector Lombard's back.

02:58:39.000 Did you hear that Tiago Alves had a back out?

02:58:43.000 Yeah, because of a hurricane.

02:58:44.000 Lombard's fighting a big guy.

02:58:46.000 Was that what it is, because of a hurricane?

02:58:48.000 Yeah.

02:58:48.000 There's nothing wrong with Rockhold.

02:58:50.000 He looks fine.

02:58:52.000 The thinnest I've ever seen him.

02:58:54.000 Talking shit to each other.

02:58:57.000 Rockhold should destroy him.

02:58:59.000 I want to hear what they were saying, man.

02:59:00.000 Oh, listen, David Branch's no joke, dude.

02:59:03.000 Don't get confused.

02:59:04.000 If Rockhold fucks up and gets clipped by Branch, what are they saying to each other?

02:59:09.000 No volume?

02:59:10.000 Branch's been talking shit for a while now.

02:59:11.000 Can't hear nothing?

02:59:14.000 Yeah, see if you can hear it.

02:59:22.000 That's Anik.

02:59:23.000 Let me hear this.

02:59:26.000 I'm gonna break you up son.

02:59:28.000 I'm gonna break you up son.

02:59:35.000 Hmm.

02:59:35.000 That's a good fight.

02:59:37.000 That's not that dramatic.

02:59:37.000 I wasn't great shit talking.

02:59:38.000 I'm gonna break you up, son.

02:59:40.000 What does that mean?

02:59:40.000 I'm gonna break you off, son.

02:59:42.000 It'd be funny if you said that.

02:59:43.000 I'm gonna get all up in that ass.

02:59:44.000 What does that mean?

02:59:45.000 What does that mean?

02:59:45.000 What exactly does that mean?

02:59:46.000 Well, you're not gonna win a fight, right?

02:59:47.000 You know that.

02:59:48.000 So what are you gonna do?

02:59:49.000 You break me up?

02:59:49.000 You're gonna break me up?

02:59:51.000 What does that mean?

02:59:52.000 Luke's been gone for a while.

02:59:53.000 Branch is a tough customer, and he's a former world champion at World Series of Fighting at heavyweight, middleweight.

02:59:58.000 But if you're not in the UFC, I don't give a fuck.

03:00:01.000 You're not fighting the same guys Luke Rockhold fought.

03:00:03.000 Well, he fought Rumble, and he went to a decision.

03:00:06.000 In World Series?

03:00:07.000 Lost a decision to rumble in World Series.

03:00:09.000 At light heavyweight.

03:00:10.000 Yeah.

03:00:10.000 That's rumble in World Series.

03:00:11.000 He wasn't exactly a world beater.

03:00:13.000 It wasn't that long ago.

03:00:14.000 It wasn't the rumble in the UFC. Also, Dave Branch had his run in the UFC before World Series.

03:00:19.000 Not good.

03:00:20.000 Then it was a World Series of fighting.

03:00:22.000 Does work.

03:00:23.000 Well, Gerald Harris KO'd him with a slam in his first fight.

03:00:26.000 Great slam.

03:00:26.000 From the guard.

03:00:27.000 Picked him up and slammed him.

03:00:27.000 It was a great slam.

03:00:28.000 In the UFC, yeah.

03:00:29.000 Yeah, and then he lost to...

03:00:31.000 It's like, it depends like how focused, motivated.

03:00:35.000 Very skillful.

03:00:36.000 He's very skillful.

03:00:37.000 His ground game is very good.

03:00:38.000 Talking about Branch or Rockhold?

03:00:39.000 Yeah, Branch.

03:00:40.000 I think I'm a ground Rockhold.

03:00:42.000 See, you can't say underrated because he's underrated because he's fighting, he's playing grab-ass in World Series of Fighting.

03:00:48.000 It's not even close to that.

03:00:49.000 I mean, you're talking about WNBA compared to NBA. I just think he's very talented, and if Rockhold doesn't take him seriously the same way he didn't take Bisping seriously, he'd get fucked up.

03:00:58.000 100%.

03:00:58.000 There's a lot of pressure on Rockhold, because he's been gone for a while.

03:01:02.000 He needs this win.

03:01:04.000 The only way I think Rockhold gets fucked up is, again, if he doesn't take him serious, and if his heart's not in it.

03:01:11.000 But if a game Rockhold shows up, a game David Brandt shows up, Rockhold destroys him.

03:01:18.000 I can see Rockhold even submitting him.

03:01:20.000 Underrated with his top position.

03:01:21.000 His top game is like having a fucking tree on you.

03:01:24.000 His jiu-jitsu is ridiculous.

03:01:26.000 Yeah, very ridiculous.

03:01:26.000 You look at the Lyoto Machida fight, beat the shit out of him from the top position.

03:01:32.000 When he got Weidman down, you could see Weidman was shocked.

03:01:37.000 He submitted Bisping with one arm after a head kick, but still.

03:01:41.000 I think Rockhold's stand-up is going to be the difference maker in this.

03:01:45.000 And he's got a long reach, man.

03:01:46.000 He's huge.

03:01:47.000 He's got to make sure that he doesn't fuck up and get clipped again.

03:01:49.000 But I want to see what happens, because when a guy like Rockhold, who has a lot to lose but not a lot to gain, fights a guy like Branch, who has the golden opportunity in front of him.

03:02:00.000 I mean, if Branch can beat Rockhold, it's just gigantic.

03:02:03.000 Elevates him.

03:02:04.000 Huge.

03:02:05.000 And I've been watching his training footage.

03:02:07.000 He's training fucking hard.

03:02:09.000 Just the question is, is it hard enough?

03:02:11.000 Is he in that kind of shape?

03:02:14.000 Is he at world-class level?

03:02:16.000 He's really never fought anybody like Rockhold other than Rumble in the World Series.

03:02:19.000 But also, with Branch, it's like, are you gonna take the fucking governor off and go after it?

03:02:25.000 Because his last fight, maybe it's just a dance partner.

03:02:27.000 Even the World Series fight, he's not murking, guys.

03:02:30.000 So it's like, in the UFC, he's never been that guy everyone was afraid of.

03:02:34.000 Luke Rockhold will take the governor off and kick you in the fucking face.

03:02:37.000 It's a very interesting fight because it's supposed to be, if you looked at it on paper, it would be more of a showcase fight for Rockhold.

03:02:43.000 Rockhold was the former champion.

03:02:45.000 I don't think David Branch is ranked in the top five.

03:02:48.000 I think he's nine.

03:02:49.000 Yeah, that makes sense.

03:02:51.000 So it's a big opportunity for Branch, you know?

03:02:54.000 How old is Branch?

03:02:57.000 I want to say he's like 36. Can't tell the black guys. 1.00

03:02:59.000 How dare you?

03:03:01.000 You son of a bitch.

03:03:01.000 It's a good thing.

03:03:02.000 35. Yeah, so he's not too old.

03:03:06.000 It's going to be interesting.

03:03:07.000 And then Rockhold is like, what, 30?

03:03:09.000 Rockhold's still pretty young.

03:03:12.000 I think.

03:03:13.000 The thing about Rockhold, he needs this fight because out of sight, out of mind.

03:03:17.000 Oh, yeah.

03:03:17.000 He doesn't find a grip, so everyone's like, all right, let's see it.

03:03:19.000 Not only that, everybody remembers Bisping clipping him, knocking him out, and then talking mad shit to him inside the cage after he knocked him out.

03:03:27.000 Is this fight tonight or Saturday night?

03:03:29.000 Tomorrow night.

03:03:29.000 Is it for sure tomorrow night?

03:03:30.000 We're doing a fight companion, but you're not gonna be here.

03:03:34.000 You guys are doing a fight companion instead of...

03:03:36.000 I'll watch that later.

03:03:37.000 Triple G. I can't miss Triple G. I gotta see.

03:03:39.000 Maybe I'll watch a little bit of Triple G. You're crazy.

03:03:42.000 A little bit of that.

03:03:43.000 I cannot fucking watch.

03:03:44.000 We've got multiple screens here.

03:03:45.000 Yeah.

03:03:45.000 Oh, we'll watch both.

03:03:46.000 Dude, I'm too correct for Triple G. Why don't I put one of them on YouTube as well?

03:03:51.000 Bravo playlist.

03:03:52.000 In the background, you see Tower 7 collapsing.

03:03:55.000 We'll put K1 on one of the screens.

03:03:58.000 I just can't miss it, man.

03:04:00.000 Yeah, this card's not that bad.

03:04:02.000 You know, it would have been a lot better with Tiago Alves and Mike Perry.

03:04:05.000 That would be a crazy fucking fight.

03:04:06.000 Mike Perry's a monster.

03:04:08.000 They're both American top team, too.

03:04:09.000 That's right.

03:04:10.000 Yeah, Perry's a monster, but Tiago is just very skillful.

03:04:14.000 There's a big difference.

03:04:15.000 Okay, he's fighting Alex Reyes.

03:04:17.000 Stepped up.

03:04:18.000 Alex Reyes is no joke, man.

03:04:21.000 13-2.

03:04:23.000 Who's Alex Reyes fought?

03:04:25.000 Short notice.

03:04:25.000 I've seen him fight.

03:04:26.000 Yeah, right?

03:04:27.000 Like, what kind of shape is he in?

03:04:29.000 Can he make the weight?

03:04:33.000 What does it say?

03:04:35.000 No record there?

03:04:36.000 It's not?

03:04:37.000 Well, they have to update it.

03:04:38.000 Fight history.

03:04:40.000 Alright, let's wrap this fucker up. 1.00

03:04:42.000 Good night, everybody.

03:04:44.000 Fighter and the Kid, TFATK.com.

03:04:46.000 Long Beach, next Friday.

03:04:48.000 Laugh Factory.

03:04:49.000 Laugh Factory, Long Beach.

03:04:52.000 TFATK.com, live.

03:04:53.000 Live.

03:04:55.000 Tickets for the first show just went on sale today for New Year's Eve.

03:05:00.000 Tickets for the second show, the 10 o'clock show, I think they're sold out.

03:05:05.000 At the Wiltern in Los Angeles, me and the great and powerful Ian Edwards, who's, in my opinion, one of the funniest fucking comedians working in the world today.

03:05:13.000 So first show is going to be at 7.30.

03:05:16.000 Second show is at 10.00.

03:05:18.000 7.30 tickets went on sale a couple hours ago.

03:05:21.000 All right, you fuckers.

03:05:22.000 We'll see you soon.

03:05:23.000 Bye-bye.

03:05:23.000 Big kiss.

03:05:37.000 Thank you.

The Joe Rogan Experience - September 15, 2017

Joe Rogan Experience #1012 - Brendan Schaub

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript