The Joe Rogan Experience - October 29, 2019


Joe Rogan Experience #1372 - Kevin Smith

Topics
podcasting changed your life Caviar Gold weed Columbus swinger house conspiracy Sober Octobers challenge being vegan and IF strength training Turkish get-up exercise combat sports fighting promoting retirement in combat sports Meldrick Taylor KO controversy sub-concussive trauma damage fighting and knockouts failure is just success training taekwondo and comedy George Carlin Miss Pat stories recovered crafts any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic weed Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
Hosted by
Joe Rogan
Guests
Kevin Smith
Mentioned
George Carlin Bob Lazar Silent Bob Strike Back Silent Bob Reboot Bert Kreischer Kevin Smith Meldrick Taylor Mike Tyson Chris Rock Newsradio Dave Foley Zen Yoda Rogan Ken Burns David Fravor Larry Flint Bill Cosby Aesimov Jamie Thor Julio Cesar Chavez John Witherspoon and 94 more
JRE MMA Show #81 with Dave Leduc Joe Rogan Experience #1373 - Kyle Kulinski

Episode Stats


Length

1 hour and 59 minutes

Words per minute

196.81

Word count

23,519

Sentence count

2,776

Harmful content

Misogyny

33

sentences flagged

Toxicity

739

sentences flagged

Hate speech

31

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

On this episode of the podcast, I sit down with my good friend and podcaster, Bob Jesowshek. We talk about how he got started in his career, his struggles with drugs and alcohol, and how he's come a long way in a short period of time. We also talk about his new podcast, Bob's new book, and what it's like being a podcaster on the air 24/7. I hope you enjoy this episode, and don't forget to subscribe on your favorite streaming platform so you don't miss the next episode! If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE and leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts! Subscribe, Like, and Share to stay up to date with what's going on in the world of podcasting and comedy! Cheers. -Jon Sorrentino and Alex Blumberg Jon and Alex talk about their experience with marijuana and how they've come to terms with their addiction to the drug and alcohol they use to get through their day to day life. Also, they talk about what it means to be sober and how important it is to have a sober October and how it is in their everyday life and how to deal with the stress of being an adult in this crazy world. Bob and Alex discuss what it feels like to be in a sober. Alex talks about how they're going to get high and sober in a way that's not only sober, but also how to stay sober and sober, and why it's important to be a day to do that. . Bob talks about his experience with drugs, and the importance of being a sober and not having a designated driver. and why he doesn't care about it and how much he's going to be able to do it all the time, and much more. Thank you for listening to this episode. We hope you guys enjoy it! - Jon is a great friend of mine, and we hope you all enjoy it. <3 -Jon and Alex is a good friend of ours and we love you're a friend of his work and we appreciate your support and support us -Bob and Alex's support us in this podcast and we want to make sure you know that you're not only that you know you'll have a good time in this is going to make it so much more than that's a good one. Thanks for listening.

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:01.000 Headphones.
00:00:01.000 Do I need them?
00:00:02.000 I like them.
00:00:04.000 I mean, just to gauge my own voice?
00:00:06.000 You don't need them.
00:00:07.000 We can not have them.
00:00:09.000 Call-ins, right?
00:00:09.000 No, no.
00:00:10.000 No, we don't need them.
00:00:12.000 I like how you're mocking me with that marijuana.
00:00:14.000 Come on, man.
00:00:15.000 Just openly.
00:00:16.000 It's your sober October.
00:00:17.000 Yes, I know, man.
00:00:18.000 It's my un-sober lifetime.
00:00:21.000 When was the last time you were sober?
00:00:22.000 How many days have you ever done it?
00:00:23.000 What a great question.
00:00:25.000 Let me see.
00:00:26.000 When was the last time?
00:00:27.000 It was somewhere I was on the road.
00:00:29.000 I couldn't get my hands on weed.
00:00:32.000 Probably when I was in London or something like that.
00:00:35.000 That's usually an overseas thing.
00:00:37.000 Right.
00:00:38.000 And I went like two days.
00:00:40.000 And you know...
00:00:41.000 It's like I did my time, man.
00:00:44.000 It felt like...
00:00:45.000 Oh, I get it.
00:00:46.000 And I remember what this was like.
00:00:49.000 Right.
00:00:49.000 But like...
00:00:51.000 Why bother?
00:00:52.000 Like, you know, post heart attack, I feel like I'm living on borrowed time anyway.
00:00:57.000 So I'm like, well, I'm going to spend that time as well as I possibly can.
00:01:01.000 And generally in a THC drenched condition, this is not a brag and I'm not like, kids, you should try this at home.
00:01:08.000 But like, I only...
00:01:11.000 I'm not ingesting when I sleep.
00:01:13.000 So, like, I wake, wake.
00:01:15.000 Really?
00:01:15.000 Yeah.
00:01:15.000 All day?
00:01:16.000 Yeah.
00:01:17.000 Is there anything...
00:01:18.000 Is that...
00:01:19.000 Don't say it like that.
00:01:20.000 The way you're like, all day.
00:01:21.000 Like, judgy.
00:01:23.000 I mean, just because it's Sober October, you'd be joining me right now.
00:01:26.000 Yes, I would.
00:01:27.000 But I'm always...
00:01:28.000 If it was like, smoke this member November.
00:01:30.000 I'm always in awe of people who do go 24-7.
00:01:35.000 I think...
00:01:36.000 Really?
00:01:36.000 Because I only do it because I thought you did.
00:01:38.000 Do you need to...
00:01:39.000 I was trying to impress you.
00:01:41.000 What?
00:01:41.000 Am I out here alone?
00:01:42.000 I was under the impression, you too, I know you do a lot more and shit. 0.99
00:01:46.000 Well, let's talk about that real quick. 0.99
00:01:48.000 I get to interview you for a minute or two. 0.98
00:01:51.000 I've been in here in jumps and spurts, and in those jumps and spurts, you have become the most powerful fucking broadcaster on the planet. 0.96
00:02:02.000 Like, crazy popular everywhere. 0.97
00:02:04.000 You can crack a smile. 1.00
00:02:05.000 You know I'm writing shit. 1.00
00:02:07.000 Don't go hard on me. 1.00
00:02:09.000 No, it's weird.
00:02:10.000 Why?
00:02:11.000 Can't you enjoy it? 1.00
00:02:12.000 Come on, motherfucker. 1.00
00:02:13.000 My whole life, I wanted to be at the top of something. 1.00
00:02:16.000 You are at it.
00:02:17.000 I was at the top of podcasts for like a minute back when we started and shit back in the old Fleshlight days. 0.51
00:02:22.000 But like, you are now beyond. 0.99
00:02:24.000 You've transcended the fucking medium. 0.99
00:02:26.000 You gotta tell me... 1.00
00:02:27.000 Don't wince!
00:02:28.000 You gotta tell me it feels good.
00:02:30.000 Otherwise, what am I striving for in my career? 0.99
00:02:32.000 And to be honest, I don't really strive if you've seen the shit I do. 0.95
00:02:35.000 But like, there is an idea of like... 0.98
00:02:38.000 You know, oh man, at the top, it must be amazing. 0.94
00:02:40.000 And like, no bullshit, you're absolutely at the top. 1.00
00:02:43.000 You had fucking Snowden on your podcast, dude. 1.00
00:02:46.000 Everything feels exactly the same, but different. 0.99
00:02:50.000 Explain.
00:02:51.000 It's still fun.
00:02:52.000 I still enjoy talking to people like you, and I had my friend Kyle Kalinsky on earlier.
00:02:57.000 I've had some really interesting people on.
00:03:00.000 I've always enjoyed talking to interesting people, so that's the same.
00:03:04.000 Everything's the same in that regard.
00:03:06.000 It's different in that it's very obvious when I go places that it's having more of an impact.
00:03:13.000 Because you're the same person, right?
00:03:15.000 But the world changes.
00:03:17.000 Like the impact.
00:03:17.000 You put out the signal and the world sort of changes and shifts.
00:03:22.000 Right, right.
00:03:22.000 More lovers, more haters, more this, more that.
00:03:25.000 Everything just increases.
00:03:26.000 It becomes more.
00:03:27.000 Yeah, it becomes more.
00:03:28.000 It becomes weird.
00:03:30.000 People want to interview you.
00:03:31.000 People want to do things.
00:03:32.000 And I don't do any of those things.
00:03:34.000 Can I tell a quick story?
00:03:35.000 Yeah.
00:03:36.000 Because I never want to cut you off because I could listen to you. 0.96
00:03:40.000 You're just a shame and you're a guru.
00:03:42.000 I love coming here.
00:03:43.000 And I have loved coming here, but now there's this different onus to it because it's like, I better use my time wisely. 0.98
00:03:47.000 Fucking Bernie Sanders is next. 0.98
00:03:49.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.99
00:03:51.000 It's nice.
00:03:52.000 But this is how authentic Rogan is.
00:03:57.000 So we're making Jay and Silent Bob reboot.
00:04:00.000 And I reach out to, like, everybody I know about being in the movie.
00:04:04.000 And, you know, even the people that are like, oh, man, I don't want to go to New Orleans.
00:04:08.000 That's far. 0.99
00:04:08.000 I'm like, you do remember I almost died of a fucking heart attack. 0.99
00:04:11.000 Like, all right, I'm coming. 0.99
00:04:12.000 I guilted, like, everybody into coming.
00:04:14.000 So, Jordan, who's our producer, Jason Mews' wife.
00:04:18.000 She runs our company. 0.95
00:04:20.000 She's like, I reached out to Joe's manager and he said he's not interested.
00:04:24.000 I was like, you know what?
00:04:26.000 Let me handle this.
00:04:28.000 I'll reach out to Joe.
00:04:29.000 I got Joe on direct.
00:04:31.000 I don't need a manager, man. 1.00
00:04:32.000 Some 10% are fucking getting between me and my boy and shit. 0.99
00:04:35.000 So I fucking emailed or texted Joe and I was like, hey man, we're making Reboot. 0.99
00:04:39.000 Do you want to come play? 0.99
00:04:41.000 And just flat out on Front Street, as true as it can be, he goes, I hate that acting shit. 1.00
00:04:47.000 That's what you wrote. 0.99
00:04:49.000 And you were like, I'm flattered, but I don't want to do that.
00:04:51.000 He's like, I'll talk to you about it when it's done.
00:04:53.000 I was like, alright.
00:04:54.000 That's how authentic you are. 0.99
00:04:57.000 You know you're in a place right now where you're like, can't fucking ruin my credibility with shit like acting anymore. 0.99
00:05:04.000 It's not I don't like doing it. 0.99
00:05:07.000 It takes too much time.
00:05:09.000 I don't have a whole day.
00:05:10.000 And that's not critical.
00:05:11.000 And that was not me going, look, I thought it was fantastic.
00:05:15.000 I thought it was adorable, honestly.
00:05:16.000 I'm trying to do less things.
00:05:19.000 Why?
00:05:19.000 Tell me why.
00:05:20.000 Because I do too much.
00:05:22.000 Between all the podcasts that I do, doing commentary for the UFC, doing stand-up comedy, there's a lot of things. 0.96
00:05:28.000 Those three things you've been doing for the last fucking decade, bro. 0.90
00:05:30.000 There's a lot of things. 0.97
00:05:31.000 I mean, they've all increased, perhaps.
00:05:33.000 I'm not in the fighting world, so I don't know if your jobs there have exponentially increased.
00:05:40.000 I knew you were always a big part of it.
00:05:41.000 No, I've actually cut that back a lot.
00:05:42.000 And the more I've cut that back, the more I cut things back, the happier I am.
00:05:46.000 And then stand-up, has that increased?
00:05:48.000 Stand-up has not cut back at all.
00:05:49.000 So this has increased?
00:05:50.000 This has increased quite a bit, yeah.
00:05:53.000 I'm doing six podcasts this week.
00:05:57.000 And then I'm flying to New York on Thursday, and then I'm doing Artie Lang on Friday in New York.
00:06:02.000 So that would be a seventh podcast.
00:06:04.000 We're going to carry that one over to the next week.
00:06:06.000 But that does not leave any room for trips to New Orleans to do a movie.
00:06:12.000 No doubt.
00:06:13.000 It doesn't leave any room to do anything.
00:06:15.000 I get all these weird requests to do things that just are not interesting.
00:06:19.000 I don't want to do them.
00:06:20.000 And yours is one of the most interesting things.
00:06:22.000 Believe me, I'm not putting on your spot going, like, why didn't you come?
00:06:25.000 I just don't have time. 0.97
00:06:26.000 It was the most on-brand fucking response, and it was also a lesson in like, pfft, let me reach out. 0.98
00:06:34.000 This manager knows nothing, and the manager knew exactly. 0.99
00:06:37.000 My manager is a rare thing.
00:06:39.000 She knows exactly how I feel about everything.
00:06:43.000 I say no to everything, man.
00:06:45.000 I don't want to do anything.
00:06:46.000 You and I started podcasting roughly around the same time, and it never occurred to me when I started, and I wonder if it occurred to you, to do Seasons.
00:06:55.000 No.
00:06:56.000 Right?
00:06:57.000 Like once you just turned on the machine, the machine just kept going and there's this, there's a gaping maw.
00:07:03.000 Like how do you tell an audience that's used to access all the time?
00:07:07.000 Like, we're going to do it in a clip and then take a bunch of time off and stuff like that.
00:07:12.000 No, like a television show has seasons?
00:07:14.000 Yeah.
00:07:14.000 And they seem to do that.
00:07:16.000 Like I remember when Serial had like, hey, we're this many and we're done.
00:07:19.000 I'm like, oh, I never thought of that.
00:07:21.000 Yeah.
00:07:22.000 That's a novel approach.
00:07:22.000 But that's a corporate approach, right?
00:07:24.000 Explain.
00:07:25.000 Well, it's like the same type of people that would put together a television show.
00:07:29.000 I mean, that's their approach.
00:07:32.000 That's the approach that someone who was doing something along those lines and then transitioned into podcasting, that's how they would approach it.
00:07:40.000 The way they would approach a Netflix show or an HBO show or whatever it is.
00:07:45.000 Have you encountered a bunch of that?
00:07:46.000 Again, you've been in the space for quite some time.
00:07:49.000 Now podcasts, of course, it's crazy crowded.
00:07:52.000 Everybody does it, but...
00:07:53.000 The business, my industry, or the industry that I sometimes work in, use podcasting like proof of concept now.
00:08:02.000 So you go into some place with a pitch for a TV show, and they're like, hmm, maybe.
00:08:08.000 Why don't you try it out as a podcast?
00:08:10.000 Really?
00:08:11.000 That's what's happening a lot.
00:08:12.000 That's interesting.
00:08:13.000 I met somebody, who was it?
00:08:15.000 A friend of mine who worked at Miramax with me back in the day.
00:08:23.000 She's gone on.
00:08:24.000 She's producing.
00:08:26.000 She put together a podcast package where she took it to a TV network and the TV network wasn't interested.
00:08:32.000 She was like, this is a good concept, man.
00:08:34.000 I'm going to sell it.
00:08:34.000 I think they sold it to iHeart or something like that.
00:08:38.000 Six-figure thing.
00:08:39.000 It was like 100 grand.
00:08:40.000 I'm like, they're paying 100 grand for podcasts now?
00:08:42.000 And they're like, no, no, that's just what that person got paid to bring in that show.
00:08:46.000 It's a big, big, crazy industry.
00:08:49.000 And so I've been looking for the last year and going like, Well, clearly, he must be approached on the regular to do this for somebody.
00:08:58.000 And clearly, every time you're like, why would I bother?
00:09:02.000 Like, I could do exactly what I want.
00:09:03.000 I've definitely been approached a few times.
00:09:05.000 Had to be.
00:09:06.000 Like, as I've watched the star rise and rise, I'm like, oh my god.
00:09:09.000 Like, nobody's snatched him up yet?
00:09:11.000 And then I realized, of course, there have been overtures.
00:09:16.000 But of course, if you've...
00:09:18.000 For those who've never been in this place, it's like, why would you slap a logo on it?
00:09:23.000 It's your own. 1.00
00:09:24.000 You built your own fucking thing from scratch. 1.00
00:09:26.000 Yeah, well, I'm pretty outside of the Hollywood thing now. 1.00
00:09:30.000 You know, I don't really...
00:09:31.000 But there's a market for outside of the Hollywood thing.
00:09:35.000 Like, there is some company that would be like, we will pay you. 0.96
00:09:38.000 And I suspect you've been offered crazy fucking money and had the integrity to be like, no, I still like what I'm doing. 0.98
00:09:44.000 I like this. 1.00
00:09:45.000 I'm not changing shit. 0.99
00:09:46.000 I mean, it would have to be... 0.99
00:09:49.000 You make me cry.
00:09:51.000 But I don't have to.
00:09:52.000 Bro, that's so punk, right?
00:09:53.000 That's so indie film.
00:09:54.000 That's so, like...
00:09:55.000 Like, you get it.
00:09:56.000 A lot of people, like, built their ships and then instantly tried to sell them. 0.99
00:10:00.000 And, like, this was one thing that, like, you and I get emotional about this shit. 0.96
00:10:04.000 You and I, like, were there for the beginning of something. 0.99
00:10:07.000 We weren't there for the beginning of stand-up.
00:10:08.000 You're great at it. 0.99
00:10:09.000 You weren't there for the beginning of UFC and shit. 0.98
00:10:12.000 But, like, podcasting was something like you were there for the beginning of, I was there for the beginning of, and now it's saturated. 0.97
00:10:18.000 Yeah, we were first wave.
00:10:20.000 There was a couple guys before me, like Corolla was before me.
00:10:23.000 I was pre-Corolla.
00:10:25.000 I go pre-Marin and Corolla.
00:10:26.000 Adam Curry.
00:10:28.000 Adam Curry is the absolute first.
00:10:29.000 He's the podfather.
00:10:30.000 He's the number one.
00:10:31.000 He creates it.
00:10:32.000 Have you had him on here?
00:10:34.000 No, I have not.
00:10:34.000 I don't know him.
00:10:35.000 I know, but...
00:10:36.000 Where does he live?
00:10:37.000 I have no idea.
00:10:38.000 Think about it.
00:10:40.000 Podcasting changed your life.
00:10:41.000 Talk to the guy who was the first guy that was like, I think this is a good idea.
00:10:45.000 I think he named it.
00:10:46.000 Last time I was talking to you, I was like, you gotta get Macaulay Culkin on.
00:10:49.000 And you did.
00:10:49.000 He was great.
00:10:50.000 Wasn't he fantastic?
00:10:51.000 He's such a trip.
00:10:52.000 I got another catch for you.
00:10:53.000 Okay.
00:10:54.000 It's good.
00:10:54.000 And it's gonna sound promotional, but it kind of is.
00:10:56.000 But at the same time, it isn't.
00:10:57.000 But I want to tell this dude's stories.
00:10:59.000 But like, there's a company called Caviar Gold makes weed.
00:11:03.000 I know it's Sober October.
00:11:04.000 They make our weed.
00:11:06.000 Well, I only have a couple more days.
00:11:09.000 Oh, I'm going to leave you with this, and you're going to be in heaven.
00:11:12.000 This is a sativa.
00:11:15.000 You're going to be able to have this.
00:11:17.000 Snoochie Boochies is a sativa.
00:11:18.000 Oh, that's hilarious.
00:11:20.000 Is that a box of weed?
00:11:21.000 Yeah, pre-rolls.
00:11:23.000 That's outrageous.
00:11:24.000 I took the first row, though, to be fair.
00:11:26.000 I smoked it myself.
00:11:27.000 Jesus Christ.
00:11:28.000 That's the sativa.
00:11:30.000 That's the wake-up weed.
00:11:31.000 You smoke that, you're ready to clean house, record podcasts.
00:11:34.000 It's also pumped up with CBDs.
00:11:36.000 My man Mike at Caviar controls.
00:11:39.000 He's like Swamp Thing.
00:11:40.000 He controls the plant.
00:11:42.000 He works with distillates.
00:11:43.000 So he can take your weed and make a super weed.
00:11:46.000 So that's the sativa.
00:11:50.000 It smells like...
00:11:52.000 Tell me what it smells like.
00:11:53.000 It smells like a heart attack.
00:11:54.000 No, man.
00:11:55.000 It smells like maple.
00:11:57.000 I said, he goes, what do you want it to smell and taste like?
00:12:00.000 I said, breakfast.
00:12:01.000 Oh, it does smell like maple.
00:12:02.000 You gotta get it.
00:12:03.000 Right up there.
00:12:04.000 It smells like one of them McDonald's McGriddles.
00:12:06.000 Yes. 1.00
00:12:07.000 Yes, bitch. 1.00
00:12:08.000 It's like smoking a McGriddle. 1.00
00:12:09.000 How'd they do that?
00:12:11.000 He's a genius.
00:12:12.000 This was a dude who was like, I couldn't get high off weed anymore.
00:12:15.000 I had to figure out how to make weed better so I could get high off it.
00:12:19.000 That's the sativa.
00:12:20.000 And he's gonna be a billionaire, man.
00:12:22.000 But you gotta have him on the show, dude, because his story is like...
00:12:27.000 Fascinating.
00:12:27.000 His weed growing story?
00:12:28.000 How he got to this place in life.
00:12:31.000 It made me want to be in business with him.
00:12:34.000 I was like, this guy, he's got a movie in him.
00:12:36.000 So that's the sativa.
00:12:37.000 This is the indica. 1.00
00:12:40.000 And this shit is deep on the THC. It's called Snoogans. 1.00
00:12:44.000 This is indica.
00:12:46.000 Yes. 0.88
00:12:47.000 So black. 1.00
00:12:47.000 You're going dark. 1.00
00:12:48.000 So this is like 45% THC right here.
00:12:52.000 Smoke.
00:12:52.000 45%?
00:12:53.000 Yes, son.
00:12:54.000 Oh my god. 1.00
00:12:55.000 What in the fuck, man? 1.00
00:12:56.000 It's amazing. 1.00
00:12:57.000 I smoked this with Be Real and I watched them go down hard.
00:13:01.000 Be Real went down?
00:13:02.000 You took Be Real down?
00:13:03.000 I did the smoke box.
00:13:04.000 I've lived the longest episode ever.
00:13:06.000 And then this is the hybrid and the hybrid is called Berserker.
00:13:10.000 I'm going to leave you guys these three boxes.
00:13:12.000 As soon as Sober October is done, smoke them, give them out.
00:13:16.000 The guy who we do the weed with, I've been smoking his weed for like two years, this Caviar Gold weed.
00:13:21.000 I love it.
00:13:22.000 It's insane.
00:13:23.000 It's the weed you smoke if you're a stoner and you want to get stoned.
00:13:27.000 So I hit them up because we got in...
00:13:29.000 45%?
00:13:30.000 45%.
00:13:31.000 What did it used to be?
00:13:32.000 It's like werewolf weed.
00:13:34.000 It'll change it.
00:13:35.000 What it used to be.
00:13:36.000 I mean, most pre-rolls, you go buy an expensive pre-roll, 20 to 25 range.
00:13:41.000 What is it like when you go to England and you take two days off?
00:13:44.000 What is that feeling?
00:13:45.000 You sit there and go like, boy, everything sure is crisp.
00:13:49.000 Does it need to be?
00:13:50.000 It's not bad.
00:13:51.000 It's not like, I'm jonesing, I'm pounding tables.
00:13:54.000 I don't have that kind of relationship with it.
00:13:57.000 But it is kind of like...
00:13:59.000 Remember, I wore a hockey jersey forever.
00:14:02.000 A lot of people were like, you don't want to wear something else?
00:14:05.000 I'm like, eh.
00:14:07.000 I've been married for like 20 years.
00:14:09.000 I dig in.
00:14:10.000 Once something works for me, I stick with it.
00:14:12.000 Went vegan, still vegan.
00:14:15.000 Never really altered since that happened and stuff.
00:14:18.000 You did that post-heart attack, right?
00:14:20.000 Post-heart attack.
00:14:21.000 The day after the heart attack, because my kid made me.
00:14:25.000 My kid was like, she'd been vegan for a couple years.
00:14:27.000 And she was scared because she'd never been through anything.
00:14:30.000 A real first world kid. 0.98
00:14:31.000 Wonderful kid, but no tragedies in life and shit like that. 0.97
00:14:34.000 We did well as parents. 0.98
00:14:35.000 Are you getting regular blood worked on?
00:14:37.000 I just went and saw my doctor two months ago.
00:14:42.000 Dr. Leidenheim.
00:14:43.000 And did the stress test where you're on the treadmill and you go up and stuff.
00:14:49.000 And then they take all the blood.
00:14:50.000 And he was like, whatever you're doing, keep doing it.
00:14:52.000 It's amazing.
00:14:53.000 He said, I can see your heart because they take pictures of your heart.
00:14:55.000 He's like, I know where the heart attack was, so I know exactly where to look.
00:15:00.000 He's going, if I didn't know where to look, you would never tell.
00:15:02.000 He's like, right now there's no lasting damage.
00:15:05.000 Keep going.
00:15:05.000 So I hike Runyon every day.
00:15:07.000 Nice.
00:15:08.000 I vegan out like a year and a half ago because of the kid.
00:15:11.000 And I haven't really strayed back, so I'm all plant-based.
00:15:14.000 And I'm intermittent faster.
00:15:16.000 I don't eat breakfast anymore.
00:15:18.000 I'm not going to be like, breakfast is propaganda, but it kind of is.
00:15:21.000 You don't really need to eat that early in the day.
00:15:23.000 You know what?
00:15:24.000 That's untrue.
00:15:25.000 Thin people maybe do.
00:15:26.000 Guy my size certainly didn't need to be eating breakfast.
00:15:30.000 Could have skipped a few meals.
00:15:30.000 I do the same.
00:15:31.000 I take 16 hours off.
00:15:33.000 You wait to break the fast.
00:15:35.000 Do you pick a time or is it as deep in the day as you can go?
00:15:38.000 No, just 8 and 16. I just do it based on...
00:15:42.000 So then what's the soonest you eat then, generally speaking?
00:15:44.000 It depends, but I've gone as late as like 1, 2 in the afternoon.
00:15:49.000 Yeah, that's why I try to make it till noon the earliest and like by 2 I'm ready, I'm ravenous.
00:15:54.000 Yeah, I think it's totally doable.
00:15:59.000 Your body gets really used to it too.
00:16:01.000 What I generally do is I get up in the morning, I'll have a cup of coffee and then I work out.
00:16:08.000 And either I run or I do yoga or I do something.
00:16:12.000 Whatever I do is pretty intense.
00:16:14.000 And then I do podcasts generally around noon.
00:16:18.000 That's when I start the day.
00:16:20.000 And so I've already been up for hours and hours.
00:16:23.000 And sometimes I don't even eat until after the podcast.
00:16:26.000 Sometimes I'll eat at like three times.
00:16:28.000 Have you gone days where you don't eat at all?
00:16:31.000 No.
00:16:32.000 I've done that.
00:16:33.000 I burn off too many calories, I think.
00:16:35.000 Well, you also work out every day.
00:16:37.000 I just have the hike and stuff.
00:16:38.000 But I love days where I can totally skip all the way down because the body is still feeding off of stored energy and stuff like that.
00:16:47.000 But I'm also, you know, I'm a WW guy, ambassador.
00:16:52.000 So that made, like, my reduced eating made, like, staying on points, like, insanely easy.
00:16:58.000 Right, right.
00:16:59.000 And are you just maintaining now?
00:17:00.000 Are you trying to continue to lose?
00:17:01.000 Now I'm maintaining.
00:17:02.000 Like, I'm on the road for the next, like, 60, well, we have 63 dates with Jay and Silent Bob Reboot.
00:17:08.000 We've just been in Jersey, Chicago, Detroit.
00:17:13.000 Grand Rapids, St. Paul, St. Louis, Columbus.
00:17:17.000 That's the first leg.
00:17:18.000 And now we go to Texas and stuff.
00:17:19.000 We're doing that for like 62 weeks.
00:17:21.000 Is this a publicity tour?
00:17:21.000 We're just touring the movie.
00:17:23.000 Rather than like, hey, we'll put the movie out in a thousand theaters.
00:17:26.000 We don't have that kind of marketing money.
00:17:27.000 So instead, me and Jay are just touring with the movie.
00:17:30.000 Oh, okay.
00:17:31.000 Essentially, it's like a comedy tour or like a small punk band tour.
00:17:35.000 We go to a theater, we set up shop, we sold tickets in advance, a lot of the tours sold out, rebootroadshow.com for tickets.
00:17:43.000 And we intro the movie, watch the movie with them, and then hang out afterwards, Q&A and shit like that.
00:17:49.000 And for me, it's like, you know, it's a pretty grueling schedule every day in a different city, but every day I get to like sit and watch the movie with the exact audience it was made for.
00:17:59.000 It's not like walking into a multiplex that's playing your movie, and even if it's crowded, you're like, man, I hope We're good to go.
00:18:26.000 With the movie, essentially.
00:18:28.000 Right, right, right.
00:18:28.000 And, you know, we've just taken the movie and kind of eventized it by being like, hey, man, come watch it with us, because you do that.
00:18:36.000 That's very cool. 0.96
00:18:37.000 And in a world where people would come see me and Jay anyway, talk about the old movies, like, and pay 50 to 100 bucks, we're like, they'd pay the same thing, see us bring a new fucking movie.
00:18:46.000 So it's been incredibly successful, man. 0.69
00:18:49.000 Like, big sold-out shows.
00:18:51.000 We've had to, like, double up on shows.
00:18:53.000 But watching it with the audience is, like...
00:18:56.000 It's fantastic.
00:18:58.000 Do you guys do a Q&A? Yeah, afterwards.
00:19:00.000 We share the stage, which is difficult because I tend to, as you see, blah, blah, blah. 0.97
00:19:06.000 So I've tried to hold back to let him kind of take front and center during the Q&A because he's the star of the movie and he's amazing in the fucking flick. 0.94
00:19:14.000 I tell people at the beginning of every night, I'm like... 0.96
00:19:17.000 We're good to go.
00:19:35.000 And like, somebody should put you in a movie one day.
00:19:37.000 And then one day I was that person.
00:19:38.000 And he was our passport and has been our passport to the world.
00:19:42.000 The guy least likely.
00:19:43.000 The guy that was never going to get out of Highlands, you know, on his own accord.
00:19:47.000 But like, simply by being like, wait, say these things here on camera.
00:19:51.000 Now we've got a movie.
00:19:53.000 Like, he opened up the entire world to us.
00:19:55.000 So it's his finest hour in this movie. 0.99
00:19:57.000 Like, he's funny as fuck, man. 0.99
00:19:59.000 He carries the whole show. 0.99
00:20:00.000 But... 0.99
00:20:01.000 He also gets to be emotional, because it's about him finding out he's got a long-lost daughter and shit, so it's a father-daughter movie. 0.99
00:20:07.000 And so there are moments in the movie where people cry, and not because they're like, Kevin fucked up another movie! 0.98
00:20:13.000 They're like, oh my god, he's getting me there as an actor. 0.96
00:20:16.000 It's been fucking thrilling to watch. 0.61
00:20:18.000 So every night, it was thrilling to watch when we made it. 0.98
00:20:21.000 Every night I get to sit back and watch the audience take it in.
00:20:25.000 And I'm used to making comedy, and you want people laughing, otherwise if it's silence, it's death.
00:20:30.000 But there are moments in the movie where, like, it's quiet, and that's a good thing. 0.99
00:20:34.000 And, like, you know, I still clench my asshole, because in any silence, you're always like, you just need one heckler to be like, fuck this blows, or whatever, and the audience breaks, or whatever. 0.99
00:20:42.000 So far, man, it's been, like, really fucking beautiful. 1.00
00:20:45.000 You just put the seat out there, though, the fuck this blows seat. 1.00
00:20:48.000 I know. 1.00
00:20:48.000 I know. 1.00
00:20:49.000 I know. 1.00
00:20:50.000 Fuck, as it fell out of my mouth, I was like, you just damned yourself. 1.00
00:20:53.000 We're going to Houston tomorrow night. 1.00
00:20:56.000 Like, I left the tour...
00:20:57.000 Because Joe was gracious enough to be like, hey man, you come in on the 29th.
00:21:01.000 And we had a day off and stuff.
00:21:03.000 So I left.
00:21:03.000 I was in Columbus last night.
00:21:05.000 This is a place called Studio 35. They were like, tell Joe Rogan we want him.
00:21:09.000 I was like, to be fair.
00:21:10.000 He's from Columbus.
00:21:10.000 Everybody wants.
00:21:11.000 Do you know Studio 35?
00:21:12.000 Indianola. 1.00
00:21:13.000 Fucking on Indianola, yes! 1.00
00:21:15.000 Holy shit, man. 1.00
00:21:16.000 Fuck, I was just there. 1.00
00:21:17.000 I was there a week ago. 1.00
00:21:17.000 What's crazy? 1.00
00:21:18.000 Were you there a week ago?
00:21:19.000 So you know that theater? 1.00
00:21:20.000 It's a fantastic fucking theater. 0.99
00:21:22.000 I always know Columbus as that theater, as that street. 0.99
00:21:26.000 And then we actually went into the city, and I was like, they built a whole city around that little corner and shit. 0.89
00:21:30.000 They're like, that's been here forever. 0.93
00:21:32.000 Did you know, and you must know, Columbus is the swinger capital of the United States of America? 1.00
00:21:38.000 What?
00:21:38.000 Columbus is a lot of things.
00:21:40.000 Is that what it says on the license plate?
00:21:42.000 Maybe, yeah.
00:21:43.000 Columbus is a lot of things.
00:21:44.000 It probably should.
00:21:45.000 We were staying there.
00:21:46.000 We went to do a show at Studio 35 years ago for the first time.
00:21:50.000 Almost 10 years ago, we've known these cats.
00:21:52.000 Great people.
00:21:53.000 And they put us up in a house.
00:21:56.000 The house was neatly appointed, but nobody lived there. 0.99
00:22:00.000 Even as an Airbnb, it was just very clean and shit. 0.88
00:22:04.000 And so when we got back to the place, they were like, do you like the house? 0.95
00:22:07.000 And we were like, yeah, it's nice, man. 0.98
00:22:08.000 It's in the middle of the woods, away from everything, down a beaten path and shit. 0.97
00:22:13.000 And we were like, yeah, it's nice. 0.99
00:22:14.000 And they were like, it's the swinger house. 1.00
00:22:16.000 And I'm like, what do you mean? 1.00
00:22:17.000 They're like, that's the house where the swingers go to fuck. 1.00
00:22:20.000 They were like, didn't you notice all the boxes of tissues? 1.00
00:22:22.000 And I realized every fucking room had a box of tissues in the corner. 0.98
00:22:28.000 And I was like, why would that happen here in Columbus, Ohio? 0.99
00:22:31.000 And they were like, Columbus, Ohio is the swinger capital of the United States of America. 1.00
00:22:35.000 You should go back with a black light.
00:22:36.000 And check it all out. 1.00
00:22:38.000 Look at this Jackson Pollock motherfucker. 0.99
00:22:40.000 Find out what's happening, where the splatters are. 0.99
00:22:42.000 I think I remember that night sleeping on my jacket on top of the bed. 0.80
00:22:48.000 Because I was like, you know, I got my own cum to deal with. 0.99
00:22:52.000 But have you ever heard that or is that horseshit? 0.99
00:22:54.000 That's where Hustler started was in Columbus. 0.90
00:22:56.000 Downtown Columbus is where Larry Flint started Hustler. 0.98
00:22:58.000 I think we're fucking on to something, man. 0.99
00:23:01.000 Columbus is the birth of a lot of fucking places. 0.99
00:23:03.000 That's what he said. 0.99
00:23:04.000 You open up the door for Jamie, he's got conspiracy theories that go for days.
00:23:08.000 This would change the whole show, so...
00:23:10.000 I don't care, man.
00:23:11.000 Columbus is this hidden jewel.
00:23:13.000 It's a great place.
00:23:14.000 It is really, really cool.
00:23:15.000 It's a great place.
00:23:15.000 I love it.
00:23:16.000 But it's a great fucking theater, man. 0.99
00:23:19.000 I've yet to see any proof of swinger activity myself. 0.99
00:23:22.000 I recorded my 2009 Comedy Central special at the, well it was a Spike TV special at the time, at the Southern Theater in Columbus.
00:23:31.000 Yeah.
00:23:32.000 With a good crowd. 1.00
00:23:33.000 Fuck yeah, it was great. 1.00
00:23:34.000 I love Columbus. 1.00
00:23:35.000 I love it.
00:23:36.000 Last time I was there it was like what?
00:23:38.000 A year and a half ago?
00:23:39.000 Yeah, September.
00:23:40.000 The Schottenstein?
00:23:42.000 About a year ago, yeah.
00:23:42.000 About a year.
00:23:43.000 They came out for us last night, man. 1.00
00:23:45.000 Fuck, the place is awesome. 1.00
00:23:46.000 They sold out two shows for us. 1.00
00:23:47.000 Really lovely people.
00:23:48.000 I love it.
00:23:48.000 So we go to Houston tomorrow.
00:23:50.000 First show in Houston sold out.
00:23:52.000 I'm there in a couple weeks.
00:23:53.000 Are you?
00:23:53.000 Yeah.
00:23:54.000 Sell me a few tickets.
00:23:55.000 We got to sell like 20 tickets in that second Houston show because we've not had a show that isn't sold out.
00:24:00.000 Like we played the Fillmore in Detroit that was sold out.
00:24:02.000 When is the show?
00:24:04.000 There's one, the one in Houston, Spar Night, but then there's San Diego, there's Chattanooga.
00:24:11.000 That's been a difficult one to sell.
00:24:13.000 You ever been to Chattanooga?
00:24:14.000 No, I've never been.
00:24:15.000 We posted a show and it was moving and we were like, alright, we'll add a second show.
00:24:20.000 And then both of the shows kind of stalled a certain place.
00:24:23.000 So Chattanooga, Tennessee.
00:24:25.000 How active are you on social media?
00:24:27.000 Pretty active.
00:24:28.000 Like I post every day on Instagram and every day on Twitter.
00:24:31.000 I kind of keep those active.
00:24:32.000 What's the new one that all the kids do?
00:24:34.000 TikTok.
00:24:35.000 Yeah.
00:24:35.000 Do you do TikTok?
00:24:36.000 Nope.
00:24:36.000 Because we're men.
00:24:37.000 I'm not men. 1.00
00:24:38.000 Like we're fucking butch. 0.99
00:24:39.000 Just we're old men. 1.00
00:24:40.000 Fucking men. 1.00
00:24:41.000 We're old. 1.00
00:24:41.000 We're old. 1.00
00:24:42.000 That's what it is.
00:24:42.000 How old are you?
00:24:43.000 49. 52. Really?
00:24:45.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:24:46.000 Old as fuck. 0.99
00:24:46.000 So like, not for nothing, but like, if that's 52 and this is 49, what were we worried about? 0.99
00:24:52.000 We were worried about what 52 was when we were in high school.
00:24:55.000 Which was what?
00:24:56.000 Dead people.
00:24:59.000 People who didn't take vitamins, people who didn't exercise regularly, people who weren't on top of it.
00:25:03.000 Maybe I'm just biased because the older I get, I want to believe this, but didn't 50 look older when you were a kid?
00:25:11.000 Oh, 100% did. 0.98
00:25:12.000 When my dad was 50, I was like, oh, fuck, all right, there's 50. Yeah. 0.99
00:25:15.000 The dudes look different now.
00:25:17.000 It's health.
00:25:18.000 It's diet.
00:25:20.000 Diet's a big factor.
00:25:22.000 Getting enough nutrients.
00:25:23.000 Not smoking cigarettes.
00:25:25.000 That's a huge factor.
00:25:26.000 Weed.
00:25:26.000 Smoking weed instead.
00:25:26.000 That's true.
00:25:27.000 I'll put cigarettes down.
00:25:28.000 Weed probably does a lot for you.
00:25:30.000 It relaxes you for sure.
00:25:32.000 Weed saved my life.
00:25:33.000 It for sure reduces inflammation.
00:25:36.000 And CBD. I am a giant proponent of CBD. I take CBD every day.
00:25:41.000 I don't want this to sound like a commercial, but that sativa is pumped up with 30% CBD. He jacks up the CBD. So when you smoke it, you're healing something as you smoke it, but it's a nice crisp pie.
00:25:53.000 That sounds like a commercial, but it's good.
00:25:55.000 Yeah, I take it in drop form.
00:25:57.000 I drink this stuff, Kill Cliff, which is a drink that has CBD in it.
00:26:02.000 I just think it's a miracle anti-inflammatory elixir from nature.
00:26:10.000 I'm a huge believer in it.
00:26:11.000 It alleviates anxiety.
00:26:13.000 It's good for so many people with arthritis and so many issues. 0.98
00:26:17.000 My friend Dave Foley, his hands were all fucked up, man. 0.96
00:26:20.000 He had real bad arthritis. 0.98
00:26:21.000 And now they move freely and easily.
00:26:24.000 Newsradio Dave Foley.
00:26:25.000 Yeah, Newsradio Dave Foley has full use of his hands because of CBD. Because of the CBDs.
00:26:30.000 Yeah.
00:26:31.000 He deserves full use of his hands.
00:26:33.000 That dude's a genius.
00:26:34.000 He does.
00:26:34.000 He is.
00:26:35.000 You saw him work.
00:26:36.000 Yes, yes.
00:26:36.000 I have to tell you.
00:26:37.000 Like, that's something I usually say to people.
00:26:39.000 Like, Dave Foles is a genius, and you've got to back it up.
00:26:41.000 But I can just say it to you, and you're like, bro, I told you.
00:26:44.000 He was the guy. 1.00
00:26:45.000 Are you seriously opening a fucking beer with a knife? 1.00
00:26:47.000 Look how butch you are. 1.00
00:26:48.000 Oh, my God. 0.99
00:26:49.000 That's so Rambo, bro. 1.00
00:26:53.000 It's fucking nuts. 0.99
00:26:54.000 It's for people to think I'm cheating. 1.00
00:26:55.000 It's a Heineken Zero alcohol.
00:26:57.000 And is that...
00:26:58.000 So Sober October includes...
00:26:59.000 I guess it includes...
00:27:00.000 It's not just weed sober.
00:27:01.000 Everything.
00:27:02.000 It's not sex sober, is it?
00:27:03.000 Oh, no.
00:27:04.000 That's not sobriety. 1.00
00:27:05.000 I thought you were going straight edge or some shit. 1.00
00:27:06.000 That's gross. 1.00
00:27:07.000 Wow. 1.00
00:27:08.000 And not for charity, not for king or country, just for fucking... 0.99
00:27:13.000 Well, we started it off... 0.98
00:27:14.000 What happened was it started off four years ago with a weight loss challenge.
00:27:19.000 She and my friend Tom Segura and my friend Bert Kreischer.
00:27:22.000 And I kind of hosted the weight loss challenge.
00:27:24.000 They had to see who could lose the most.
00:27:27.000 That's Bert.
00:27:29.000 Who could lose the most over the course of a month.
00:27:33.000 And the winner, I sent him to a basketball game and Ari sent him to... 1.00
00:27:36.000 What did Ari send him to?
00:27:37.000 Some other...
00:27:39.000 Yeah, they went to some, you know, they had a good time, right?
00:27:43.000 So that was one year.
00:27:44.000 Then the next year, we all decided to join in.
00:27:46.000 During the whole weight loss challenge, Bert kept drinking.
00:27:50.000 We're very concerned about Bert's health. 1.00
00:27:52.000 And so we're like, man, Bert's gonna fucking die if we don't get this motherfucker to stop drinking. 1.00
00:27:56.000 Do you think he could stop drinking? 1.00
00:27:57.000 And I said, alright, how about we all do it?
00:27:59.000 We'll all go sober for the whole...
00:28:01.000 Well, I didn't even know that Sober October is like a thing.
00:28:04.000 People have been doing it for years.
00:28:06.000 Is that right?
00:28:06.000 Long before us.
00:28:07.000 You were like, we just invented a rhyme.
00:28:09.000 And they're like, no, we didn't.
00:28:09.000 It was just pure coincidence that we started...
00:28:13.000 The first weight loss thing was October as well, right?
00:28:15.000 Yeah.
00:28:17.000 Was it?
00:28:17.000 I think it started close to the end of the Thanksgiving time period or something like that.
00:28:21.000 What?
00:28:21.000 Because the weigh-in was in January, I believe.
00:28:23.000 Was it?
00:28:24.000 Yeah.
00:28:25.000 Oh, okay.
00:28:26.000 Well, for whatever reason, we decided to do it during October.
00:28:30.000 By dumb luck, there was a thing already called Sober October.
00:28:33.000 We literally didn't even know when we started doing it.
00:28:37.000 So we did it, and we incorporated a challenge.
00:28:40.000 We had to do 15 hot yoga classes.
00:28:43.000 And everybody didn't believe that everyone was sober.
00:28:45.000 Ari said he was going to drug test me.
00:28:48.000 I think it happened, too, because Ari was gone, and we had to do that, like, another podcast to talk about the Welch of the Bet.
00:28:54.000 And that was probably, like, in September.
00:28:56.000 And then it was like, oh, well, October is next month.
00:28:58.000 Sober October.
00:28:59.000 Oh, maybe that makes sense.
00:29:00.000 Yeah, because Ari was gone for, like, four months in Asia. 0.99
00:29:03.000 So...
00:29:05.000 So we had sobriety for a month plus 15 90-minute hot yoga classes over the month.
00:29:11.000 So you had to do basically a yoga class every other day.
00:29:13.000 Right.
00:29:13.000 Which was great.
00:29:14.000 So we did that.
00:29:15.000 And then last year we said, okay, we'll do it again.
00:29:18.000 But this year we're going to do a fitness challenge.
00:29:21.000 That got really crazy.
00:29:22.000 So that year, it was a competition.
00:29:25.000 And that year, we were working out five, six, seven hours a day.
00:29:29.000 I set off the fire alarm in my gym for my sweat, literally, from steam coming off my body.
00:29:34.000 Set off the fire alarm.
00:29:35.000 Is that possible?
00:29:36.000 It's possible.
00:29:37.000 I have a video.
00:29:39.000 Is it seriously?
00:29:40.000 Yes.
00:29:40.000 Yes.
00:29:41.000 So you got your body heated up so much of the fire alarm.
00:29:44.000 My home gym is essentially a little smaller than this room.
00:29:49.000 And it has, you know, elliptical machine in a cage and squat rack and all that jazz. 0.92
00:29:54.000 And I set off the fucking fire alarm from steam because I did five, six hours on the elliptical machine. 0.94
00:30:00.000 I watched this. 0.99
00:30:02.000 There was a...
00:30:02.000 Yeah, look at that.
00:30:05.000 That's it?
00:30:06.000 Flashback?
00:30:06.000 You can hear it if you listen to it.
00:30:08.000 Oh, my God.
00:30:08.000 Look at the fog.
00:30:10.000 Oh, there's the alarm.
00:30:14.000 That puddle on the ground, that's all my sweat.
00:30:16.000 Are you kidding?
00:30:17.000 Nope.
00:30:18.000 So we decided not...
00:30:19.000 Why do this?
00:30:21.000 Well, because I'm going to win.
00:30:23.000 And did you?
00:30:23.000 I'm not going to lose.
00:30:24.000 Of course I won.
00:30:25.000 I'm not going to lose.
00:30:26.000 We were going crazy.
00:30:28.000 We were going crazy.
00:30:29.000 And then we all had to sit down this year and say, we can't do this again.
00:30:33.000 Because this year...
00:30:34.000 We only had to do 10 classes.
00:30:36.000 So whether it's yoga or Tom's doing boxing and we took some tactical gun courses and Tom's also done some weightlifting.
00:30:48.000 Ari's done some meditation classes.
00:30:49.000 It's all just bettering yourself and you have to read 500 pages of books, you know, whatever book, 500 pages.
00:30:57.000 So that's the challenge this month.
00:31:00.000 Easier.
00:31:01.000 All of that is just not on my menu.
00:31:05.000 Exhausted.
00:31:05.000 Yeah, my god!
00:31:07.000 It's just...
00:31:08.000 Like, October should be a fun month.
00:31:09.000 We're heading into Halloween and stuff like that.
00:31:12.000 Right. 0.98
00:31:12.000 Fall, Samhain, shit like that. 0.98
00:31:14.000 And it just seems like a lot of... 0.96
00:31:16.000 What is this?
00:31:16.000 What'd you say?
00:31:17.000 Samhain.
00:31:17.000 Samhain?
00:31:18.000 A little bit of metal.
00:31:19.000 What's Samhain?
00:31:20.000 Samhain, remember?
00:31:22.000 Samhain is the end of summer, the festival of Samhain.
00:31:27.000 I have no idea what that is.
00:31:29.000 I've never heard that before.
00:31:29.000 They talk about it on Halloween.
00:31:30.000 Pull up the clip.
00:31:31.000 The movie Halloween?
00:31:32.000 From John Carpenter's Halloween.
00:31:34.000 Donald Pleasance tells a story about Samhain.
00:31:38.000 That was the other name for Halloween.
00:31:40.000 Really?
00:31:40.000 And there's a metal band called Samhain.
00:31:43.000 Season of the Dead. 0.99
00:31:46.000 But the notion of getting all dry and shit is just... 0.99
00:31:51.000 I mean, I get it. 0.99
00:31:52.000 You're not interested.
00:31:53.000 Do you drink?
00:31:53.000 No.
00:31:54.000 And I never really did...
00:31:56.000 I never had a taste for it.
00:31:57.000 I was obviously a sugar guy.
00:31:59.000 That was definitely my vice.
00:32:01.000 Well, since I've bet you, you probably lost more than 100 pounds.
00:32:05.000 Since way back.
00:32:06.000 How much have you lost, all told?
00:32:08.000 Well, my highest weight I ever was...
00:32:11.000 Like at one point I was like, I weigh my area code and I was 323. Holy shit, dude! 0.97
00:32:17.000 Well, I'm not done because I was like, well, let's round this motherfucker out and I went up to 330. Really? 1.00
00:32:22.000 Yeah, which is nobody's area code that I know of.
00:32:25.000 So that was my highest.
00:32:26.000 Then I saw, what was it?
00:32:29.000 Was it Fed Up?
00:32:30.000 The Sugar documentary?
00:32:40.000 Mm-hmm.
00:32:48.000 So then I started losing weight.
00:32:50.000 First I went on Penn Jillette's suggested diet with Ray Cronis, Just Sides, and it was like all potatoes, just eat potatoes for like two weeks.
00:33:00.000 And I was like, this will be easy.
00:33:02.000 I love potatoes. 1.00
00:33:03.000 And after two fucking days, you learn you hate potatoes. 1.00
00:33:06.000 You love milk and salt and butter and shit that goes into mashed potatoes. 1.00
00:33:10.000 But just eating a baked potato, and you can have as many as you want. 1.00
00:33:13.000 They're like, oh my god, eat as many as you fucking want. 0.98
00:33:15.000 And that's where I learned fasting. 0.99
00:33:18.000 Because when your choice is like a fucking potato or nothing, you're like, you know what? 0.99
00:33:23.000 I'd rather eat fucking air than eat a potato and stuff. 0.99
00:33:26.000 And then you realize, oh, I'm okay. 1.00
00:33:27.000 I didn't die.
00:33:28.000 And my body will start feeding off some stored fat.
00:33:31.000 So, at that point, when I had the heart attack, my kid was like, please go vegan.
00:33:37.000 Because there was a nutritionist was in the room the morning after I had the heart attacks. 0.97
00:33:42.000 Kid slept there all night just staring at me to make sure I didn't, like, fucking have a second heart attack. 0.96
00:33:47.000 And really, that wasn't the big danger. 0.99
00:33:49.000 The big danger, apparently, was in order to get to my heart, they punctured my groin.
00:33:53.000 That's how they get to your heart.
00:33:54.000 That's the easiest, fastest route and stuff.
00:33:56.000 And so, the whole night, they're like, yeah.
00:33:59.000 Yeah.
00:34:00.000 Yeah.
00:34:01.000 Well, I mean, they could either crack your chest, but they don't like to do that anymore, right?
00:34:05.000 So it's not as invasive to go through your femoral, and so you go through the groin.
00:34:09.000 Some people go through the wrist as well.
00:34:11.000 I met a cat who was like, they went through my wrist.
00:34:13.000 I was like, why did they go through my groin? 1.00
00:34:14.000 He's like, probably wanted to see your dick. 1.00
00:34:16.000 So... 1.00
00:34:18.000 I sat there.
00:34:24.000 The morning after the kid was there and the nutritionist was like, if you thought about plant-based, that'll cut your cholesterol down, or at least losing some meat.
00:34:34.000 And the kid was like, yeah, go vegan, one of us.
00:34:36.000 And she was definitely looking out for me, but at the same time, She knew that I'd be a big get for the vegan community. 1.00
00:34:44.000 Like, oh, I flipped this fucking motherfucker, this meat-eating. 1.00
00:34:48.000 I used to drink two gallons of milk a day. 1.00
00:34:49.000 If I could flip him, that's a good get.
00:34:52.000 So I tried it, and I was like, oh, I'll give it a shot.
00:34:55.000 I lived the way I wanted to for many, many years, and obviously that led me to almost dying.
00:34:59.000 So how about I try what you're talking about, you know, for a few months, six months.
00:35:05.000 And that was a year and a half over a year and a half ago.
00:35:08.000 So being vegan and also intermittent fasting, meaning essentially I don't do breakfast like yourself, has dropped me down another 70. So I'm 198 right now, which is like my high school weight.
00:35:23.000 Wow.
00:35:24.000 Yeah, that's kind of nuts.
00:35:25.000 More than 100. Wow.
00:35:26.000 Over the entire time that we've known each other, yeah.
00:35:29.000 I've lost a human being.
00:35:31.000 I've delivered a child and it went somewhere.
00:35:33.000 It's dead. 1.00
00:35:33.000 I used to carry it like an embedded twin and shit. 1.00
00:35:37.000 A lean woman. 1.00
00:35:38.000 Or a lean man.
00:35:41.000 How much do you weigh?
00:35:42.000 All right, well, half of you.
00:35:45.000 That's crazy.
00:35:47.000 That's an awesome accomplishment, man.
00:35:49.000 It was.
00:35:49.000 It wasn't.
00:35:50.000 I didn't try.
00:35:51.000 Like, you know, again, Weight Watchers are now they're called WW. They were absolutely helpful, but it was never about, like, I want to look better.
00:35:58.000 It was just, you know, my options were get healthier, fucking die. 0.99
00:36:02.000 My old man had two heart attacks. 1.00
00:36:04.000 First one was a warning.
00:36:05.000 Second one took him out.
00:36:06.000 And, you know, as much as I could change my lifestyle...
00:36:10.000 And I did.
00:36:11.000 I still got my mom and my dad's hearts.
00:36:14.000 Are you exercising?
00:36:16.000 Yeah, I hike every day up Runyon, except since we've been on the tour.
00:36:20.000 That's been a little more difficult.
00:36:21.000 Only hiking?
00:36:22.000 Yeah, all the way up and stuff.
00:36:24.000 I haven't gotten into...
00:36:25.000 Weights or anything.
00:36:27.000 The good thing about strength training is strength training is particularly important as you get older.
00:36:33.000 It maintains bone density, maintains your muscle mass, and there's a lot of correlations between people who exercise and maintain muscle and heart health and just overall vitality of your body.
00:36:48.000 A stronger body is more durable, you know, and It's not hard for you to hire somebody.
00:36:54.000 Just hire a trainer. 0.99
00:36:55.000 That's true.
00:36:56.000 I think when I'm done with the tour, we're done in February.
00:36:59.000 Yeah, just hire somebody.
00:37:01.000 It's time.
00:37:01.000 You can hire somebody.
00:37:03.000 That I never imagined I'd ever do.
00:37:06.000 I never imagined...
00:37:08.000 I'd have muscles. 0.99
00:37:09.000 Like, I ain't never done a pull-up my entire fucking life. 0.98
00:37:11.000 I remember in high school hanging on the bar, and they're like, move on, Smitty, because, like, I couldn't fucking get there. 0.92
00:37:16.000 Be nice to do a pull-up before I leave this world.
00:37:18.000 Yeah, for sure. 0.97
00:37:19.000 Especially, like, what if I'm hanging off a cliff and I'm in danger or shit? 0.76
00:37:21.000 It's 100% possible for you to do a pull-up. 0.99
00:37:23.000 In this life.
00:37:24.000 Yes.
00:37:25.000 Not today, but, like, intellectually.
00:37:26.000 No, but in this life, yeah.
00:37:27.000 And you're right.
00:37:28.000 It's a nice slow build.
00:37:29.000 That's what you want.
00:37:30.000 And I've also got like access to like, hey, I'll hire you.
00:37:33.000 Yes. 0.95
00:37:33.000 It's not even like I got to get my shit together and do it myself. 0.95
00:37:36.000 It's good to go somewhere. 0.97
00:37:38.000 It's good to go somewhere instead of having someone come to you.
00:37:40.000 It's like a change of environment.
00:37:43.000 Sort of it puts you in the mode like, okay, we're here to work.
00:37:46.000 But I recommend that to anyone who's getting, well, just anyone, period. 0.92
00:37:51.000 I think strength training is very, very important.
00:37:53.000 You've actually sold me.
00:37:55.000 It don't take much.
00:37:56.000 I'm pretty gullible.
00:37:57.000 But you've actually sold me in as much as, like, I trust you.
00:38:00.000 You're smart.
00:38:00.000 And what you said about bone density makes a lot of sense.
00:38:03.000 And I'm only getting older. 0.99
00:38:05.000 And that shit's only getting more hollow-y. 1.00
00:38:07.000 Yeah, weight-bearing exercises, carrying weight. 1.00
00:38:10.000 And, you know, it doesn't have to kill you.
00:38:12.000 It doesn't have to be something that's brutal and it breaks you down so you're exhausted the next day.
00:38:16.000 You really want, like, a light workout.
00:38:18.000 You really want a slow build.
00:38:20.000 Find someone who understands the state of fitness that you're at right now and gives you a nice slow build.
00:38:25.000 Just, like, squats with very little weight, a few deadlifts with very little weight.
00:38:30.000 Just a little bit of this and a little bit of that.
00:38:33.000 A little bit of push-ups, a little bit of sit-ups, and that's it.
00:38:36.000 You don't need to work out that long. 0.98
00:38:37.000 You can work out a half an hour, three days a week, and you're fucking golden. 0.98
00:38:41.000 What? 0.98
00:38:41.000 Make a giant change in your life. 0.98
00:38:43.000 Sure.
00:38:44.000 I like them odds.
00:38:45.000 Three days a week?
00:38:46.000 Oh, yeah.
00:38:47.000 So you don't even have to do it every day?
00:38:48.000 No, you don't want to do it every day. 0.97
00:38:49.000 But that 30 minutes, is it like a fucking not fighting 30 minutes? 0.98
00:38:51.000 It doesn't even have to be that crazy. 0.99
00:38:53.000 No.
00:38:53.000 Build your body up to that.
00:38:55.000 You've got to realize you are a guy who's never really gotten after it your whole life.
00:39:00.000 So if you just shock your body into getting after it now, it's probably going to revolt.
00:39:04.000 You don't want that.
00:39:06.000 You already tried that.
00:39:07.000 Yeah, you want slow. 1.00
00:39:07.000 The heart was like, fuck you! 1.00
00:39:08.000 You want just some light, weight-bearing exercise. 1.00
00:39:12.000 And build up over a few months, man.
00:39:14.000 There's no rush.
00:39:15.000 You're just trying to be healthy, right? 0.98
00:39:17.000 You're not trying to fucking win Mr. Olympia. 0.98
00:39:19.000 Just start slow. 0.99
00:39:21.000 Do weights with a squat rack and fucking 25 pounds on each side. 0.99
00:39:26.000 Just... 0.99
00:39:26.000 Three or four. 0.99
00:39:27.000 Just three or four.
00:39:28.000 Put it down.
00:39:29.000 Walk away for five minutes.
00:39:30.000 You know, what really irritates me about this is like as you imitated a guy doing squats, you closed your eyes, you went to a place, you literally played a character, you acted in front of me.
00:39:39.000 Well, it's just, I'm thinking about just doing it.
00:39:42.000 I could do it.
00:39:43.000 If I'd shot your thing here, it might have made more sense.
00:39:48.000 Make it so easy.
00:39:49.000 Well, I do it all the time.
00:39:50.000 So it's me.
00:39:51.000 It's like I understand that some people don't.
00:39:53.000 It was adorable though as you closed your eyes.
00:39:56.000 I'm picturing you doing it.
00:39:58.000 My eyes would be popping out of my head.
00:40:00.000 Nah, you'd be fine because I don't want you to do anything that makes your eyes pop out of your head.
00:40:03.000 But how do I get muscly then?
00:40:05.000 It takes time, man.
00:40:07.000 Time.
00:40:07.000 It's an investment.
00:40:08.000 I don't know if I have that.
00:40:09.000 It's a slow changing, like water hitting rocks, right?
00:40:14.000 When you see water carving a pathway through rocks... 1.00
00:40:17.000 That shit takes forever. 1.00
00:40:19.000 It takes forever. 1.00
00:40:20.000 And that's the same thing with fitness.
00:40:21.000 You're not going to get giant muscles quick. 0.98
00:40:24.000 I mean, you could be one of those fucking psychopaths that decides to completely change their life and completely dedicate themselves to fitness and all of a sudden you get jacked and you have all these muscles. 0.98
00:40:32.000 But that is going to have to be a massive commitment and a life-changing thing. 0.99
00:40:37.000 And for a guy who's had a heart attack, I don't recommend that at all.
00:40:39.000 I recommend...
00:40:41.000 You just slowly start working out with weights.
00:40:44.000 Nothing even brutal.
00:40:45.000 You know what a Turkish get-up is? 0.99
00:40:47.000 No.
00:40:48.000 It's a great exercise.
00:40:49.000 Is that a hand job?
00:40:49.000 No, that's different.
00:40:51.000 Full-body exercise.
00:40:52.000 You have a kettlebell in your hand.
00:40:53.000 You lie down on your back on the ground.
00:40:56.000 You lift your arm up.
00:40:57.000 You slowly get up to your feet.
00:40:59.000 We're standing up with proper technique.
00:41:01.000 And then you let it down.
00:41:03.000 And then you sit down again.
00:41:04.000 You lie back down on your back.
00:41:05.000 Again, it's a full body workout.
00:41:07.000 And it's not, you know, it's nothing that's going to kill you.
00:41:10.000 It's something that's just going to give you a little bit of strain to strengthen your connective tissues.
00:41:15.000 How many reps?
00:41:15.000 You don't have to do that many.
00:41:16.000 Four or five.
00:41:17.000 Like, that's what I would say.
00:41:18.000 And that's, and I'm done for the day?
00:41:20.000 No, you do a couple other things.
00:41:22.000 Do a couple other things. 1.00
00:41:23.000 You're adding shit now. 0.99
00:41:23.000 But I'm not talking about you breaking your body down at all. 0.99
00:41:27.000 I'm talking about you slowly adding resistance training.
00:41:30.000 This meathead mentality that you've got to go out and break your body down. 0.97
00:41:34.000 I think that's a terrible thing to do to someone who doesn't exercise because they're going to be in fucking severe pain. 0.98
00:41:40.000 And it's also, I don't think it's productive. 0.86
00:41:41.000 I don't think it's necessary.
00:41:42.000 I think the way to do it is to lightly get into it.
00:41:45.000 Then, once you start feeling it, I feel a little bit better.
00:41:48.000 It's easier to open up a jar of pickles.
00:41:50.000 Everything's moving better.
00:41:51.000 And then, you ramp You just, hold on. 0.99
00:41:54.000 You fucking sold me on the pickle opening. 0.99
00:41:55.000 Pickles are hard, man, to this day. 0.99
00:41:57.000 I never, I hate pickles, but you know it's tough to open up is like a jar of tomato sauce.
00:42:01.000 Yes, it's hard, man.
00:42:02.000 And many times I've turned to my wife and be like, is it just me?
00:42:05.000 Can you try this? 0.99
00:42:07.000 There's gotta be fitness in my fucking jeans somewhere, man, because my mom's dad Was a boxer. 0.99
00:42:15.000 Growing up, like a guy, and he had a record. 0.99
00:42:18.000 He was Kid Dixie Schultz.
00:42:21.000 Growing up, in my grandmother's house, there was a picture of a guy in that position with trunks, but old-timey.
00:42:30.000 And I was like, who's that?
00:42:31.000 And she's like, that's grandpa.
00:42:33.000 And he didn't look like grandpa, so I never associated it.
00:42:35.000 But apparently he was a boxer.
00:42:38.000 That would be a fun thing for you to do too.
00:42:40.000 Not even box somebody, but have someone hold pads for you.
00:42:43.000 And you learn how to punch and hit pads because it's exciting.
00:42:46.000 It's fun to do.
00:42:47.000 It's like an interesting thing to do.
00:42:48.000 You hit things.
00:42:50.000 Like Batman.
00:42:51.000 That's how you sell it.
00:42:52.000 Does Batman hit pads? 1.00
00:42:53.000 He hits fucking, you know, injustice and crime. 1.00
00:42:56.000 Oh, right, right, right. 1.00
00:42:57.000 People. 1.00
00:42:57.000 Shit like that. 1.00
00:42:59.000 My boxer grandfather, I want to see if you agree with this theory. 1.00
00:43:02.000 Okay.
00:43:03.000 So you've been the man in the ring, so to speak.
00:43:07.000 You've been at the epicenter of attention of a thousand, five thousand, a bunch of people as a man on stage.
00:43:13.000 Even the man in the ring sometimes when you're doing a UFC event and stuff like that. 0.98
00:43:18.000 You know what it's like, the surge, the energy of That comes from like, I'm here and I got their attention and I command the fucking room.
00:43:28.000 It's part of why we do what we do. 0.96
00:43:30.000 My grandfather, having been a boxer, must have felt that, right? 0.95
00:43:34.000 Like fucking probably way more than I feel when I walk up on stage or on the reboot Roadshow tour. 0.94
00:43:40.000 I'm like, oh, I feel clever sitting in the back watching the movie with the audience and hear him laugh. 0.99
00:43:44.000 This is a guy who is like, I'm the man in the ring.
00:43:47.000 And like, it's all up to me in my fists.
00:43:50.000 And I could be a god or a goat tonight. 0.99
00:43:53.000 And then it becomes primal and there's pounding and shit like that. 0.99
00:43:57.000 You would imagine there's a... 0.97
00:43:59.000 If you got in the ring and he pursued it enough to have a record...
00:44:04.000 There must have been some sort of call, some sort of satisfaction to it all.
00:44:08.000 Maybe.
00:44:10.000 Sometimes people do it for money, right?
00:44:13.000 Maybe it would have been a way to make a living.
00:44:15.000 No?
00:44:16.000 This guy, I don't...
00:44:17.000 No, he...
00:44:19.000 I mean...
00:44:21.000 You don't think he did it?
00:44:22.000 I think he was hoping for purses, but I don't think it was just like this or mailman.
00:44:28.000 Although, that's where the story's kind of gone.
00:44:30.000 Not mailman, but...
00:44:32.000 This was a guy who boxed professionally.
00:44:35.000 And the story was that my grandmother, like when they had their first kid, my aunt Virginia, my grandmother was like, you can't be a boxer anymore.
00:44:46.000 And so he was like, alright.
00:44:48.000 And then he stopped being a boxer.
00:44:50.000 And then my grandfather became a custodian in the Newark courthouse.
00:44:55.000 And every day he would get dressed up in a suit and take the bus to the Newark courthouse.
00:44:59.000 They lived in a different section of Newark.
00:45:02.000 And then he'd put on his custodian outfit and clean the toilet, sweep the floors and stuff like that. 0.99
00:45:07.000 Noble, salt of the earth shit. 0.99
00:45:09.000 So my whole life I never questioned this. 1.00
00:45:12.000 You know, your wife says, you quit.
00:45:14.000 And you quit and stuff like that.
00:45:16.000 Until I became older and I became something of the man in the ring myself.
00:45:22.000 I know what it's like to stand at attention for everybody, where everybody, you are the focus of thousands, where you get a level of affection from one vociferous mass that is unparalleled from any amount of affection you could give from any other single human being in this world.
00:45:44.000 It is...
00:45:45.000 I've never done heroin, but I imagine it's better than heroin.
00:45:48.000 It's one of the greatest drugs.
00:45:49.000 It fuels us, and we obviously like it. 0.99
00:45:52.000 We keep fucking doing it. 0.96
00:45:53.000 We make money off it, yes, but there's many ways to make money, and we like it, and we do it because there's power to it, and it feels fantastic, and you feel like, man, they like me. 0.99
00:46:02.000 They really like me.
00:46:04.000 And then I started thinking, why would he have put that all to the side?
00:46:09.000 Like, how do you step outside all that just because your wife is like, I don't want you to do that anymore? 1.00
00:46:15.000 And then it made me reconsider my grandparents.
00:46:19.000 And I figured out, and I want to see if you back me on this play.
00:46:23.000 You don't know these cats, so you've got no skin in the game, so you can't offend anybody. 0.99
00:46:28.000 Doesn't that sound like she did dirty shit that nobody else did? 1.00
00:46:32.000 In the bed, you mean? 1.00
00:46:33.000 Yes!
00:46:34.000 Son, where else but the bed?
00:46:35.000 I didn't have that thought at all.
00:46:37.000 No?
00:46:38.000 My thought is that he recognized that it's very dangerous, and he probably knew people who died, and he probably wanted to find a way out of it anyway, which most fighters do.
00:46:47.000 Most fighters, at some point in time, they realize, I'm going to have to jump off this ride one day.
00:46:52.000 I can't stay on this ride and tell him a dead man, tell him 90 years old or 100 years old.
00:46:57.000 It's not feasible.
00:46:58.000 It doesn't exist.
00:46:59.000 There's no 98-year-old boxers out there.
00:47:01.000 You think he faced his own mortality?
00:47:03.000 Every boxer does.
00:47:04.000 Every fighter does.
00:47:05.000 You hit someone and you see them get hurt.
00:47:08.000 He didn't have a great record.
00:47:08.000 He was like 50-50.
00:47:08.000 Well, then he's probably been hurt.
00:47:10.000 You see people get hurt.
00:47:11.000 You see people get pummeled.
00:47:12.000 You see people get knocked out.
00:47:14.000 Maybe you've been knocked out yourself.
00:47:15.000 And you realize that this is something that is unsustainable.
00:47:19.000 And if he's not making any money at it, it's extremely dangerous.
00:47:22.000 And you start thinking, what could happen to you?
00:47:26.000 What can happen to you?
00:47:27.000 It happens to people.
00:47:28.000 You see it happen.
00:47:29.000 If it hasn't happened to you, you watch it happen to other people. 0.99
00:47:31.000 If you're around combat sports enough, you're going to see people get fucked up. 0.99
00:47:35.000 And when you see people get fucked up, you realize like, hey, this is voluntary. 0.99
00:47:39.000 There's other ways to make a living. 0.97
00:47:40.000 I don't have to do this anymore.
00:47:42.000 I can get off this ride. 0.99
00:47:43.000 Or you're the type of person that doesn't give a fuck and you want to be a champion. 1.00
00:47:47.000 And your thought is you are here for glory. 0.99
00:47:50.000 You are here for a legacy.
00:47:52.000 You're here to leave your mark.
00:47:53.000 You want to go down in history as a great.
00:47:56.000 And if you don't feel that way, I tell people to get out.
00:48:00.000 I think fighting is one of the most singular pursuits a person can get into.
00:48:08.000 Yeah, it's like you're giving, you're not only giving like the, I'm dedicating myself to something.
00:48:12.000 You're giving your body.
00:48:14.000 Something that like you're taught your entire life, protect this.
00:48:17.000 It's also, the consequences are so grave.
00:48:22.000 The consequence is zigging and zagging.
00:48:24.000 You go the wrong way.
00:48:26.000 You run into a knee.
00:48:27.000 Wrong way, you run into a head kick.
00:48:29.000 Wrong way, you run into a punch.
00:48:30.000 You duck into an uppercut. 1.00
00:48:32.000 Your fucking lights go out. 1.00
00:48:34.000 You're laying on your back. 1.00
00:48:35.000 They've got a flashlight in your face and ice on the back of your neck.
00:48:38.000 And you don't even know what day it is.
00:48:40.000 And then that, you never get back.
00:48:42.000 And you can only get so many of those in your life.
00:48:46.000 It depends on the person, but you get knocked out three, four, five times, whatever the number is. 0.86
00:48:51.000 There's a certain number that your life is going to be fucking different now. 0.98
00:48:56.000 Because now your brain doesn't work good anymore. 0.99
00:48:58.000 That's a fact.
00:49:00.000 And maybe it'll get a little bit better over time.
00:49:01.000 Maybe you can go through some cognitive therapy.
00:49:03.000 There's some different things they're doing with...
00:49:22.000 Yeah, he's probably smart. 0.97
00:49:26.000 Like, this is my perfect excuse to not fucking get hurt.
00:49:29.000 Yeah, because he wasn't making any money doing it either, it sounds like. 0.96
00:49:31.000 I gotta tell you, you gave him his dignity back. 1.00
00:49:33.000 I honestly was like, he gave it all up because she gave up the ass. 1.00
00:49:37.000 I doubt it. 1.00
00:49:38.000 She was like a dirty German girl who was just like, I will let you do the anal, but you've got to get out of the ring. 1.00
00:49:42.000 And she was like, I'll give you one ring for the other. 1.00
00:49:45.000 And he was like, fuck! 1.00
00:49:46.000 Goddammit, Gussie. 1.00
00:49:47.000 He called her Gussie.
00:49:48.000 I think it was more likely love.
00:49:49.000 It was more likely love and family.
00:49:51.000 No!
00:49:51.000 Yeah.
00:49:52.000 I knew these motherfuckers. 1.00
00:49:53.000 Love? 1.00
00:49:54.000 Kids.
00:49:55.000 He's got a kid, right?
00:49:56.000 They had a few.
00:49:58.000 Well, when he has a kid, man, everybody loves their kids.
00:50:01.000 And you want to be around to see those kids grow up, and you don't want to be brain dead.
00:50:05.000 Look, I personally know a lot of people that have combat sports-induced brain damage.
00:50:12.000 There's no doubt about it.
00:50:13.000 No ifs, ands, or buts.
00:50:15.000 Some CTE stuff. 0.98
00:50:15.000 Yeah, that's why when I see anybody who's like half in, half out, I go fucking hard in the paint. 0.98
00:50:20.000 I tell them, man, you gotta get the fuck out of this now. 0.99
00:50:22.000 You gotta trust me. 0.96
00:50:23.000 And I've done it to the point where people think I'm mean.
00:50:26.000 And I'm like, look, I'm not mean about very many things in this life. 0.98
00:50:30.000 But when it comes to people who are delusional about their abilities in combat sports or their future in combat sports, I get fucking mean. 0.89
00:50:37.000 Because I think you gotta know. 0.56
00:50:38.000 You gotta know with no uncertain terms.
00:50:40.000 I can't be protective of your feelings.
00:50:43.000 I have to go in hard because no one else is going to.
00:50:46.000 People don't. 1.00
00:50:46.000 They bullshit you. 1.00
00:50:48.000 Coaches bullshit you. 1.00
00:50:50.000 Trainers bullshit you. 1.00
00:50:50.000 They tell you you got a chance. 1.00
00:50:52.000 Promoters are willing to put you on fights when you really should retire. 1.00
00:50:54.000 It is a dirty aspect of the business and I don't play that shit. 0.99
00:50:59.000 If I think that someone should get out, I go hard and I tell them. 0.99
00:51:03.000 I've done it to friends.
00:51:05.000 I've done it to guys that I've done commentary for.
00:51:09.000 They've asked me and they pulled me aside and I said, you got to get out, man.
00:51:12.000 You got to get out.
00:51:13.000 Because you could talk right now.
00:51:14.000 You're okay right now.
00:51:15.000 But how many more shots can you take? 0.78
00:51:17.000 How many more times can you get knocked out? 1.00
00:51:19.000 One KO can change your whole fucking life. 0.99
00:51:23.000 Meldrick Taylor got knocked out by Julio Cesar Chavez. 0.99
00:51:26.000 And Meldrick Taylor was an Olympic gold medalist, a fantastic boxer, was fast as fuck, lightning fast combinations, beautiful skill. 0.97
00:51:34.000 But Julio Cesar Chavez just kept wearing on him and wearing on him, and boom, he dropped him in the final round. 0.77
00:51:40.000 And they stopped the fight with like seconds to go in the fight.
00:51:42.000 Richard Steele stopped the fight.
00:51:44.000 It was a big controversy, like, oh my god, how could he stop the fight?
00:51:47.000 Meldrick was ahead in the scorecards, and, you know, there was only a couple seconds to go, and Meldrick would have won a decision.
00:51:52.000 It was the right call, because he was done after that fight, man.
00:51:55.000 After that fight, he was never the same. 0.99
00:51:57.000 You hear him talk today, it's the saddest shit in the world. 0.99
00:52:01.000 He can barely put together a sentence. 0.99
00:52:03.000 And he had a few fights after that against Terry Norris, who was a brutal knockout puncher, and a couple other guys.
00:52:08.000 He just was never the same again.
00:52:09.000 It was that one fight.
00:52:11.000 One fight.
00:52:12.000 One beating too much.
00:52:13.000 And it all fell apart on him.
00:52:15.000 And that can happen.
00:52:16.000 That can happen to any fighter.
00:52:18.000 And when you're done, you're done. 0.99
00:52:21.000 The only way you should ever compete as a fighter is if this is your fucking calling. 0.99
00:52:26.000 This is the thing that you're obsessed with. 0.99
00:52:28.000 It is your 100% focus.
00:52:31.000 And as soon as it's not, as soon as you have doubts, get out.
00:52:35.000 Because there's a bunch of people out there that don't have doubts.
00:52:37.000 And I always try to tell people, think about Mike Tyson before he won the title.
00:52:41.000 Think about the Mike Tyson that destroyed Marvis Frazier. 0.99
00:52:44.000 Think about that motherfucker. 1.00
00:52:45.000 That guy's all in. 1.00
00:52:47.000 You don't ever want to face a guy who's all-in when you're half-assing it.
00:52:51.000 And a lot of people are half-assing it and they don't even realize they're half-assing it.
00:52:54.000 They just have this thing in their head.
00:52:56.000 Well, I'm training pretty hard.
00:52:58.000 I'm doing good.
00:52:58.000 I got good skills.
00:52:59.000 I can beat this guy.
00:53:00.000 But when someone's in, they're in.
00:53:05.000 Combat sports are uniquely dangerous in terms of the consequences of you not being committed.
00:53:11.000 So you got to know when to get out and no one does.
00:53:14.000 Very few people.
00:53:15.000 There's like a few guys.
00:53:17.000 Andre Ward, retired, undefeated, Olympic gold medalist, two-division world champion.
00:53:21.000 He's the rarest of the rare. 0.99
00:53:22.000 Most guys, they keep going until they get fucked up. 0.98
00:53:26.000 They keep going until they get knocked out, they get brutalized, and then you meet them afterwards and they can barely talk, man. 0.99
00:53:31.000 They can barely talk.
00:53:33.000 I've seen so many guys that could just barely string words together.
00:53:37.000 Everything's a mumble.
00:53:38.000 All the words are slurring to the next word.
00:53:41.000 It's horrible, man.
00:53:42.000 And I saw it in the gym.
00:53:44.000 I saw it in the gym with guys who never made it.
00:53:47.000 They still got brain damage. 0.99
00:53:49.000 The gods of combat sports, they don't give a fuck if you win a title. 1.00
00:53:54.000 If you're eating shots, you take punches to the head, kicks to the head, you're getting fucked up, man. 1.00
00:53:59.000 It seems like it. 1.00
00:54:00.000 How come they didn't talk about that for years and years?
00:54:03.000 They didn't know.
00:54:04.000 They did know that people get punched drunk, but they didn't know what was causing it.
00:54:08.000 It's not even knockouts.
00:54:10.000 It's sub-concussive trauma that does the vast majority of the damage.
00:54:13.000 They have a lot in the world of hockey as well.
00:54:15.000 Yes.
00:54:15.000 Sub-concussive trauma is terrible, but knockouts are also horrific.
00:54:19.000 And then for me, my discussions with guys like Dr. Mark Gordon, who's an expert in traumatic brain injuries, and he works with a lot of soldiers, and he runs his TBI foundation to deal with injuries that soldiers and football players and fighters face, and his descriptions of it will scare the fucking shit out of you. 0.98
00:54:38.000 I mean, he's like, people can get brain damage from fucking jet skiing. 0.93
00:54:41.000 Just blah, blah, blah. 1.00
00:54:43.000 All that bouncing up and down can give you fucking brain damage. 0.99
00:54:44.000 So not even getting in a jet ski accident, just like... 0.99
00:54:47.000 Just jet skiing.
00:54:47.000 And if jet ski accidents, it's exacerbated.
00:54:50.000 But he's talking about like people, some people get in accidents, some sort of a, something happens to you, we get knocked out, and they are never the same again.
00:54:58.000 This is a real thing.
00:55:00.000 You can get a shot to the head, a golf ball, somebody misses, they crack you in the head with a golf ball, right?
00:55:06.000 You get hit with a line drive. 1.00
00:55:08.000 That kind of shit changes people forever, forever. 1.00
00:55:12.000 So your grandfather probably wanted out. 1.00
00:55:16.000 First, alright, some thoughts.
00:55:18.000 Number one, Sober October gives you a different Joe Rogan.
00:55:24.000 Yeah?
00:55:25.000 Oh my god, you're so dialed in, it's beautiful.
00:55:27.000 You're the Ken Burns.
00:55:30.000 Of combat sports.
00:55:31.000 I can listen to you spin yarns, tell tales.
00:55:35.000 You know what?
00:55:36.000 That's unfair, the Ken Burns.
00:55:37.000 I call you the Gene Shepard.
00:55:39.000 I don't know who that is, but I hope he's awesome.
00:55:41.000 Gene Shepard, remember Christmas Story?
00:55:43.000 Yeah.
00:55:44.000 He's the guy that narrates Christmas Story.
00:55:45.000 He wrote the books, the essays that it's all based on.
00:55:49.000 My other thoughts.
00:55:51.000 That is far more dignity than I ever afforded my grandfather.
00:55:55.000 I appreciate it.
00:55:57.000 My mom is going to appreciate that. 0.99
00:56:01.000 And then fourth, fuck, I lost my point. 0.99
00:56:05.000 I thought I hit enough of them. 0.99
00:56:06.000 To me, it hits home because I needed to know when I needed to retire, too.
00:56:12.000 When I stopped fighting, I knew.
00:56:14.000 I was like, I am not doing this the way I used to do this.
00:56:17.000 I used to be completely obsessed, but I saw a bunch of people get knocked out.
00:56:22.000 I knocked a bunch of people out.
00:56:24.000 I knew that that easily could have been me.
00:56:25.000 What does it feel like to knock somebody out?
00:56:27.000 It's weird.
00:56:28.000 It's a bittersweet feeling.
00:56:30.000 You don't feel good.
00:56:33.000 If you were in a true combat position, it would feel good.
00:56:37.000 Well, fighting for your life, you mean?
00:56:38.000 Yeah.
00:56:39.000 Competition.
00:56:39.000 I mean, it was all people my age.
00:56:42.000 I was 19, 20 years old, and I'm standing over this unconscious version of me that I just kicked in the head.
00:56:50.000 And that's how the person went out.
00:56:51.000 Yeah.
00:56:51.000 The amount of force you can generate with a kick is just so terrifying.
00:56:56.000 It's so terrifying.
00:56:58.000 You know, to think that that's going to bounce off your head and then the lights go out and then you could incur legitimate permanent brain damage from something like that.
00:57:07.000 Absolutely.
00:57:08.000 Is it in the initial kick or in the hit, the drops of the canvas?
00:57:11.000 Both.
00:57:12.000 Just the kick. 1.00
00:57:13.000 Someone kicks you in the head, someone who really knows how to kick, they bounce a fucking shin off your temple. 1.00
00:57:17.000 You might not ever be the same again. 1.00
00:57:19.000 That's real.
00:57:20.000 And you've been knocked out?
00:57:21.000 I've never been knocked out.
00:57:22.000 I've been stopped, which means I got TKO'd, I got dropped with a punch, and then the guy followed up with a bunch of punches and the referee stopped the fight.
00:57:29.000 That was the last fight I ever had.
00:57:31.000 But I was never unconscious.
00:57:32.000 There's a lot of details.
00:57:33.000 Slow it down.
00:57:34.000 Yeah, I was in a kickboxing fight.
00:57:36.000 Actually, it was three fights in a day.
00:57:38.000 I won the first two.
00:57:40.000 I won the first one by knockout. 0.98
00:57:41.000 I beat the fuck out of the second guy. 0.85
00:57:43.000 And I was pretty sick, actually, going into the fight, going into the tournament. 0.99
00:57:49.000 I would get sick sometimes because I'd be nervous and shit. 0.98
00:57:52.000 My nutrition was terrible. 0.99
00:57:54.000 And then the third fight, I got hit with a left hook.
00:57:57.000 I won the first round, and then the second round, I got hit with a left hook, and my legs just went boink!
00:58:01.000 They just stopped working. 0.99
00:58:03.000 And I remember going, what the fuck? 1.00
00:58:05.000 Shit! 1.00
00:58:06.000 Like, I'd never been dropped like that before, where my legs just—he was a perfect left hook. 0.99
00:58:10.000 He just caught me, clunk, right on the chin.
00:58:12.000 So what—if he catches you on the chin, what is the—what's happening that— It's like something happens.
00:58:20.000 It twists your brain, right?
00:58:22.000 And your brain, like, it also does something that's like nerves behind your jaw.
00:58:28.000 And when you get hit hard, it's like an electrical charge goes into your body and everything just shuts off.
00:58:34.000 It's weird.
00:58:35.000 Like, I was totally conscious, but my legs just stopped working.
00:58:38.000 I fell down.
00:58:39.000 And then while that's happening, more punches are coming?
00:58:42.000 Yeah.
00:58:42.000 No, because it was kickboxing, it wasn't MMA. In MMA, the guy would jump on you and they'd stop it right there.
00:58:47.000 Or you'd maybe grab a hold of him and maybe you would survive, maybe you wouldn't.
00:58:51.000 You know, there's arguments that it's safer in MMA because they stop it quicker.
00:58:55.000 There's also arguments that when it goes to the ground, you could actually survive better and you could hold on and maybe that would allow you to take more damage and maybe that's not as safe.
00:59:04.000 I'm in the former camp.
00:59:06.000 I think it's safer.
00:59:07.000 Okay.
00:59:08.000 Because I think when fights get stopped quicker, it's safer.
00:59:10.000 Okay.
00:59:12.000 So wait, when you got jolted and electricity went through, did you go down?
00:59:16.000 Yeah, I went down.
00:59:16.000 My legs just stopped working like this, like I'm standing up.
00:59:19.000 He hit me and I just go, plink! 1.00
00:59:22.000 So you went down ass onto your ass? 1.00
00:59:24.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:59:24.000 I went down and I got up before the count of 10. Referee, dust your gloves off. 1.00
00:59:29.000 And the kid swarmed at me again and hit me with a bunch more punches and I covered up and the referee stopped the fight.
00:59:34.000 So that was a TKO, which is Tactical Knockout.
00:59:37.000 But I had already known that I was kind of...
00:59:40.000 I was already doing stand-up comedy at that time as well.
00:59:42.000 And I had already known that I was half in, half out.
00:59:45.000 Wait, when is this?
00:59:47.000 1989. So this is before news radio?
00:59:52.000 Oh yeah, way before.
00:59:54.000 So wasn't it for you you were either going to fight or be funny?
00:59:58.000 No, well, I knew somewhere around the time I was 19 that there was no future in this.
01:00:08.000 And I was trying to make the Olympic team, which the Nationals were in Miami in 1988. Wait, where are you from?
01:00:17.000 Boston.
01:00:19.000 That's where I was at.
01:00:20.000 So I was a Massachusetts state champion, and then I would go to these national tournaments and compete against the Illinois champion or the New Hampshire champion.
01:00:30.000 I've got to ask a question on behalf of somebody else.
01:00:33.000 Hold on.
01:00:34.000 You've got a question stored?
01:00:36.000 Yeah, because I was talking to...
01:00:38.000 Your grandmother?
01:00:43.000 Yes.
01:00:44.000 Named Josie?
01:00:45.000 Yes.
01:00:46.000 Gerard Way?
01:00:47.000 Yes.
01:00:48.000 Lead singer of My Chemical Romance.
01:00:50.000 Yes.
01:00:50.000 Yeah, we're related.
01:00:52.000 That's what he said.
01:00:53.000 I was like, I'm going to do Joe Rogan.
01:00:55.000 He goes, I don't have 100% confirmation on this, but I'm pretty sure Joe Rogan is my cousin.
01:00:59.000 Yeah, we're cousins.
01:01:00.000 I think my Aunt Josie was his grandmother.
01:01:01.000 Yeah, I don't know him, but we're cousins. 0.98
01:01:03.000 How crazy that two people in the same family became super fucking famous and don't even... 0.84
01:01:09.000 Yeah, we don't know each other. 0.98
01:01:12.000 You gotta have him on.
01:01:12.000 He's fascinating.
01:01:13.000 He's good.
01:01:14.000 He'd be a good, great guest.
01:01:15.000 And plus, you're related, huh?
01:01:18.000 Yeah, we're related.
01:01:18.000 So anyway, back to the story.
01:01:20.000 So, you know, I just didn't know what I was going to do for a living.
01:01:24.000 And then...
01:01:26.000 A few things happened.
01:01:29.000 Watching a friend of mine get knocked out really bad.
01:01:31.000 There was a guy named Jersey Long, who was this badass Canadian guy, who knocked my friend Larry out.
01:01:36.000 He hit him in the head with an axe kick and just changed.
01:01:39.000 Larry was never the same again.
01:01:41.000 He was always real tentative and nervous.
01:01:43.000 He destroyed his confidence.
01:01:45.000 We weren't making any money.
01:01:48.000 So these are all amateur fights.
01:01:51.000 So there was this thing like, what am I doing?
01:01:53.000 Why is this my whole life?
01:01:55.000 Why were you doing it?
01:01:55.000 Well, it changed who I was from the time I was 15 to the time I was 21, almost 22. When I started fighting, when I started doing competitions, it gave me a focus and it gave me something where I didn't feel like I was a loser.
01:02:09.000 Right.
01:02:09.000 Like, for the first time in my life, it was something that I didn't...
01:02:12.000 I realized that if I focused on this thing and I dedicated myself to this thing, I could be successful.
01:02:18.000 And that changed how I view...
01:02:20.000 And literally be the opposite of a loser, be a winner in most cases.
01:02:22.000 Where I wasn't before that. 0.99
01:02:24.000 I was a loser. 0.86
01:02:25.000 I just didn't have anything going. 0.96
01:02:27.000 I wasn't good at school.
01:02:29.000 It was your football.
01:02:30.000 Like, for some people in high school, it's like, I found football.
01:02:32.000 Right.
01:02:32.000 I found something.
01:02:33.000 Or it was your Jesus.
01:02:34.000 Some people are like, I found Jesus.
01:02:35.000 Yes, yes.
01:02:36.000 I think that's what people need, man. 0.99
01:02:38.000 They need a something, whether it's chess or Jesus or filmmaking, whatever the fuck it is. 0.97
01:02:42.000 You find a thing and you focus it and you see some success and you're like, oh my God, I can do something. 0.98
01:02:48.000 I can do something.
01:02:49.000 I can be somebody.
01:02:49.000 I can do something that's fulfilling and rewarding and I know that I'm not a loser.
01:02:55.000 Because a lot of it is like confidence, right?
01:02:58.000 A lot of it is if you look at your life And you look at things that other people are doing, you go, God, I can't do that.
01:03:05.000 He's doing that.
01:03:06.000 These people can do that.
01:03:06.000 They're different than me.
01:03:07.000 I don't have confidence.
01:03:08.000 It takes doing something and having some success at it that gives you confidence to do other things.
01:03:14.000 And martial arts were so terrifying to me.
01:03:17.000 I was so scared of it that it became, by overcoming that and becoming successful at it, it gave me this understanding that you can do something.
01:03:27.000 You can basically do, you know, within reason.
01:03:31.000 Whatever you want.
01:03:32.000 If you just focus on it.
01:03:34.000 And you're not going to do it.
01:03:35.000 It's not going to be immediate.
01:03:36.000 You're not going to be successful immediately.
01:03:38.000 And you're going to fail.
01:03:39.000 But through those failures, you learn.
01:03:41.000 And you go back.
01:03:42.000 And you get some experience.
01:03:43.000 And you do it better next time.
01:03:44.000 And that is everything.
01:03:46.000 Failure is just success training. 0.99
01:03:47.000 Yeah, and it's like this fucking tattoo. 0.99
01:03:50.000 This is Miyamoto Musashi from the Book of Five Rings. 0.99
01:03:53.000 And in that book, he said something.
01:03:56.000 I read it when I was like 17 years old.
01:03:57.000 Once you understand the way broadly, you will see it in everything.
01:04:02.000 And that is, if anything, that is one of the main focuses of my life.
01:04:09.000 One more time, say it.
01:04:10.000 Once you understand the way broadly, you can see it in everything.
01:04:14.000 That describes you.
01:04:15.000 You're a seeker.
01:04:15.000 My favorite...
01:04:18.000 Proverb is, may you realize your own divinity in this lifetime.
01:04:23.000 I saw it on a yoga wall hanging that my wife put on the house once.
01:04:27.000 It wasn't really the message she intended.
01:04:29.000 She just liked, I think, the image of Buddha.
01:04:32.000 And one day I was letting the dogs out and I was waiting by the door so you had time to like really stare at it and I was probably just stoned enough.
01:04:40.000 And then completely understood it where I was like, oh, it is a blessing.
01:04:45.000 May you realize your divinity in this life, your own divinity.
01:04:48.000 Meaning, don't wait until you drop dead to find out you were God all along.
01:04:54.000 Handing it off to somebody else and some higher power.
01:04:57.000 Higher powers than you. 1.00
01:04:58.000 Motherfucker became a fighter. 1.00
01:05:00.000 Made him feel worth something. 1.00
01:05:02.000 Motherfucker became a filmmaker. 1.00
01:05:03.000 Made him feel worth something. 1.00
01:05:05.000 Manifested.
01:05:07.000 He's absolutely right.
01:05:09.000 You can kind of do anything.
01:05:11.000 You can't fly without a jetpack.
01:05:14.000 You can't beat LeBron James one-on-one.
01:05:17.000 Yes.
01:05:17.000 And Mike Tyson back when he was committed.
01:05:19.000 There's things you can't do physically.
01:05:21.000 But there's a lot of things you can do.
01:05:23.000 A lot of things you can get better at, and especially artistic pursuits.
01:05:26.000 Because the thing about artistic pursuits is everybody finds their own way.
01:05:30.000 So the shift to me from doing something that was competition, especially competition with grave physical consequences, to go from that to doing stand-up.
01:05:43.000 When I first started doing stand-up, I realized, okay, this could be it. 0.98
01:05:47.000 The fucking fighting thing, it's a dead end. 0.99
01:05:51.000 There's no money. 1.00
01:05:51.000 This is before the UFC. There was no money in kickboxing. 1.00
01:05:54.000 I remember I'd gotten offered a kickboxing fight, a professional fight, for $500.
01:06:00.000 And I was like, what is that?
01:06:01.000 $500?
01:06:02.000 It means I have to train for six weeks?
01:06:04.000 No alcohol, eat good, run, do all these different things, train, spar, and then $500 at the end of it.
01:06:12.000 And then maybe brain damage. 0.99
01:06:13.000 It's like when you see what porn stars get paid for anal and you're like, what? 0.99
01:06:18.000 Like, you would imagine, like, don't they pay you a million dollars to do that? 0.99
01:06:21.000 And they're like, oh no.
01:06:22.000 You know, 500 to 1,500 sounds about right.
01:06:25.000 Yeah, it's not a good deal.
01:06:27.000 So wait, do you realize then that you went from...
01:06:30.000 Like, you just 180'd it.
01:06:32.000 You went from pain to pleasure.
01:06:33.000 Your business was pain.
01:06:35.000 And then your business became pleasure. 1.00
01:06:37.000 Make motherfuckers hurt to make motherfuckers laugh. 1.00
01:06:39.000 No. 1.00
01:06:39.000 Your job as a fighter is to hurt the other person until you win. 1.00
01:06:43.000 Right, but you give pleasure to the people that watch.
01:06:45.000 Yeah, but the fight's going to happen with or without the audience, correct?
01:06:49.000 Whereas in comedy, it don't happen with or without you.
01:06:52.000 Yes, but there's always an audience.
01:06:54.000 The only time there wasn't an audience, we did have fights where people from other gyms or other dojos would come.
01:07:00.000 Dojang, because it was Korean.
01:07:01.000 They would come and we would fight them.
01:07:04.000 And there was no...
01:07:05.000 I mean, full contact fights.
01:07:07.000 There was no...
01:07:09.000 No referees. 1.00
01:07:11.000 You're so bitch. 1.00
01:07:11.000 You're butch. 1.00
01:07:12.000 You're so butch, bro. 1.00
01:07:13.000 Butch? 0.98
01:07:13.000 It's a funny word. 0.98
01:07:14.000 You're so fucking butch. 1.00
01:07:14.000 It's so like, I read about fucking superheroes pounding on each other, and you've literally hit people. 1.00
01:07:21.000 And been hit. 0.99
01:07:22.000 You know what it feels like to take a punch.
01:07:23.000 I've never been hit in my life.
01:07:24.000 This is not also me throwing that out into the universe, looking for it. 0.99
01:07:28.000 Please don't fucking hit me. 0.99
01:07:29.000 I'll pry. 0.99
01:07:29.000 You don't want to get hit. 0.99
01:07:30.000 I will offer to suck your dick before the punch is thrown. 1.00
01:07:32.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:07:33.000 Desperate to make you stop.
01:07:34.000 That might be worse than hitting you.
01:07:35.000 Yeah, no kidding. 1.00
01:07:36.000 I get bad blowjobs. 0.99
01:07:37.000 But I've never been hit. 1.00
01:07:39.000 All the stories I read about Green Arrow punches, or all the stories I've written, where fucking Daredevil punches a motherfucker, you've actually done the punching and received the fucking punch. 1.00
01:07:49.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:07:49.000 It's pretty metal. 1.00
01:07:50.000 A lot of kicks. 0.88
01:07:51.000 It's butch, dude. 0.97
01:07:52.000 That's butch.
01:07:52.000 Yeah, because my earliest martial art was taekwondo, which is mostly kicking-based.
01:07:57.000 But yeah, I did a lot of that, too.
01:07:59.000 The kickboxing was a big turnaround, too, because kickboxing happened at the end of my taekwondo career when I was realizing that taekwondo was really limited.
01:08:09.000 And it was also the beginning of me doing comedy.
01:08:12.000 It was all happening kind of at the same time.
01:08:14.000 Right.
01:08:15.000 And I just was really, really, really, really fortunate that I wanted to do stand-up comedy, and I happened to be in Boston, which at the time was one of the hubs, one of the most creative environments in the history of comedy.
01:08:31.000 Oh, my God.
01:08:32.000 I mean...
01:08:32.000 All the people you hang out with?
01:08:34.000 Well, there was a lot of guys that you'll never hear about.
01:08:38.000 Yeah.
01:09:06.000 We're good to go.
01:09:17.000 And they were just local headliners who were just masters.
01:09:20.000 They just were just destroyers.
01:09:23.000 And we got a chance to see those guys.
01:09:25.000 Greg Fitzsimmons, who's another good buddy of mine who came out of that group.
01:09:28.000 We got to see those guys when we were amateurs.
01:09:31.000 And we got to see these guys where they were just destroying in a way that you didn't even think was possible.
01:09:38.000 And we got to...
01:09:41.000 Unique opportunity as amateurs to be in this incredible environment where there are so many comedy clubs.
01:09:46.000 There was three comedy clubs in one area on Warranted Street.
01:09:52.000 There was one where was Nick's Comedy Stop, and then there was down the street, there was the Comedy Connection, and above it, there was a comedy club at the Charles Playhouse, and then across the street, there was Duck Soup.
01:10:01.000 So there was four comedy clubs within...
01:10:03.000 A half a block.
01:10:05.000 I mean, it was crazy.
01:10:06.000 It was a boom of comedy.
01:10:08.000 Then there were stitches, and there were just so many outside bars and stuff that had stand-up, too.
01:10:13.000 When did you realize you were funny?
01:10:16.000 It took ten years.
01:10:17.000 Yeah.
01:10:18.000 But Wendy, well enough to be like, I'm going to try stand-up.
01:10:21.000 Yeah, I could get laughs occasionally.
01:10:22.000 Were you funny as a fighter?
01:10:23.000 No.
01:10:24.000 I was funny to my friends in the locker room or when we were on a bus traveling to a tournament.
01:10:30.000 Everybody would be nervous.
01:10:31.000 And I'd be the guy that made everybody laugh.
01:10:32.000 Like gallows humor.
01:10:34.000 I'd be doing impressions of each other.
01:10:37.000 I had comedy for psychos.
01:10:40.000 That's how I thought of it.
01:10:42.000 And my friend Steve Graham, who I'm very good friends with to this day, he actually talked me into doing stand-up.
01:10:48.000 He was one of the ones.
01:10:49.000 Like, you should be a comedian. 1.00
01:10:51.000 And I'm like, look, I'm making you guys laugh because you're fucking crazy. 1.00
01:10:56.000 Other people are going to think I'm an asshole. 1.00
01:10:58.000 Like, this is not, like, things that people think are funny. 0.99
01:11:00.000 It never occurred to you.
01:11:01.000 You thought you were, like, living room funny.
01:11:03.000 Yeah, I thought it was mean.
01:11:07.000 It was mean funny because fighting is a mean sport.
01:11:11.000 It's mean.
01:11:12.000 You have to be mean if you want to be successful.
01:11:15.000 So some of my comedy was mean.
01:11:17.000 And then I didn't know about amateurs.
01:11:21.000 I didn't understand.
01:11:23.000 And then I went to an open mic night.
01:11:24.000 One of the things about going to an open mic night is you get to see the professionals, like the hosts, and occasionally professionals drop in and do a set, but you also get to see these amateurs who are terrible.
01:11:33.000 And you go, oh, I get it. 0.95
01:11:35.000 So everybody sucks at first. 0.98
01:11:37.000 And then... 1.00
01:11:38.000 You know, you could just go up with the people who suck and you suck too. 1.00
01:11:42.000 And it was like, okay, it was a huge relief. 0.99
01:11:45.000 Because I thought of stand-up, oh my god, it's like Richard Pryor or Jerry Seinfeld, those are comics.
01:11:50.000 You gotta be a legend.
01:11:51.000 I can't do that.
01:11:52.000 So I'd like, probably, I was faking that.
01:11:54.000 How old?
01:11:55.000 21. I went on to a comedy stage once, before I even made Clerks, when I was probably about 20. Rascals had an open mic night.
01:12:09.000 West Orange?
01:12:10.000 No, the one in Eatontown, right between the Monmouth Mall and the Seaview Square Mall.
01:12:17.000 And so I went up and I did like five minutes. 0.99
01:12:22.000 The only bit that worked was a bit about sucking my own dick, and I put that in Clerks. 0.99
01:12:27.000 Years later, I was like, oh, I remember they laughed at that bit. 0.99
01:12:30.000 I'll throw it in.
01:12:31.000 But I remember trying it, and I never told my friends this would be 1990. It was before I even saw Slacker, and that was when I knew I wanted to make Clerks.
01:12:40.000 So probably 1990 or 91 pre-August.
01:12:46.000 But it was like, I remember being like, well, I tried it, but I'll never do that again. 0.98
01:12:50.000 And now I literally make my living being on stage fucking talking. 0.99
01:12:55.000 Crazy. 0.99
01:12:56.000 It was nuts. 0.99
01:12:57.000 And that's why I'm like, that's why I had my head around my grandfather, like, how the fuck do you walk away from that? 0.99
01:13:04.000 Like, don't you feel great when you're up there and you're fucking killing and stuff like that? 0.99
01:13:07.000 I know it's like money, of course, is always a part of it. 0.96
01:13:09.000 It's nice to get what I would consider... 0.99
01:13:13.000 Overpaid to do the same shit I would fucking do anyway. 0.99
01:13:17.000 Like, I would be trying to be funny regardless and shit. 1.00
01:13:20.000 But don't you get the, like... 1.00
01:13:22.000 It's definitely great to kill. 0.99
01:13:25.000 It's horrific to bomb. 0.99
01:13:26.000 And they're counterbalanced.
01:13:28.000 Whereas as amazing as it feels to kill, it feels equally horrific.
01:13:34.000 Or maybe even more so to bomb.
01:13:36.000 It'll haunt you.
01:13:37.000 And then the thing about...
01:13:40.000 You're good to go.
01:13:57.000 This bit, here's the peak, here's the valley, here's where I bring it up, and here's where I hammer it home.
01:14:03.000 And here comes the pause, and then there's the punch.
01:14:05.000 And I'm also in the moment where I have to be... 0.99
01:14:10.000 When I'm doing a bit, if I'm doing a bit on a clock or something like that, I have to be thinking about a fucking clock. 0.98
01:14:15.000 I'm not just saying those words. 0.98
01:14:17.000 I am thinking 100% about what I'm saying.
01:14:22.000 Because if I don't, it doesn't work as good.
01:14:24.000 There's no way.
01:14:25.000 You can't just say the words.
01:14:27.000 It's a form of hypnosis.
01:14:29.000 It's like a mass hypnosis. 1.00
01:14:31.000 And these people know those fucking animals out there in that crowd. 1.00
01:14:35.000 They smell weakness. 1.00
01:14:36.000 They smell distraction.
01:14:38.000 They smell when you're disconnected.
01:14:39.000 They feel you like in the way the avatar people do.
01:14:44.000 Thank you for using a movie reference so I can understand.
01:14:48.000 Yes.
01:14:48.000 There's a thing that's happening that's undefined, because the only people that really understand it are the people who are real comics, who have been doing it a long time, who know how to kill.
01:14:59.000 And there's this thing that happens when everything's tight and everything's in place, that is, you're a ride, and you're a passenger on the ride.
01:15:09.000 You're not driving it.
01:15:10.000 You are in a sense that you have to do the work and you have to do the writing and you have to perform.
01:15:15.000 I have two shows tonight. 0.95
01:15:16.000 I fucking hammer it out all the time. 0.99
01:15:18.000 Tonight? 0.99
01:15:18.000 Yep. 0.99
01:15:19.000 Where are you going?
01:15:19.000 Ice House?
01:15:20.000 No, Comedy Store.
01:15:21.000 I was at the Comedy Store Sunday and I did an arena Saturday night in Cleveland and I did two shows at the Fox Theater Friday.
01:15:28.000 You gotta go, baby.
01:15:29.000 You gotta go, go, go, go, go.
01:15:30.000 Comedy is like running.
01:15:31.000 It's like anything else.
01:15:32.000 You gotta be in shape.
01:15:33.000 Yes, and you hate it.
01:15:34.000 And so you've got to do it all the time.
01:15:35.000 You don't enjoy it.
01:15:36.000 No, I love it. 0.99
01:15:37.000 You suck up the praise. 0.99
01:15:37.000 That's what I'm saying. 0.99
01:15:37.000 So when is the moment where you're like, ah? 0.99
01:15:39.000 But it's not that, because you can't think about that.
01:15:42.000 Because if you think about that, it's time that takes away from the actual thing.
01:15:47.000 The actual thing deserves 100% of your attention. 0.95
01:15:50.000 And the actual thing- Well, I'm not saying you feel that in the moment, but when do you fucking feel it? 0.84
01:15:54.000 Like when you're like, goodnight. 0.73
01:15:56.000 Yeah, but even then I let it go.
01:15:57.000 I just go, ooh, get it out of here. 1.00
01:15:59.000 Then I start thinking about other shit. 0.99
01:16:00.000 Why? 0.99
01:16:01.000 Because that's how I go.
01:16:02.000 That's what makes me go.
01:16:06.000 What makes me go is the thing.
01:16:08.000 I'm always concentrating on the thing.
01:16:10.000 How do I get the thing better?
01:16:12.000 How do I make it work better?
01:16:13.000 All right, so I concentrate on the thing, but then... 0.99
01:16:16.000 I fucking celebrate that like, holy shit, I stuck the landing. 0.99
01:16:19.000 I do that with my friends right after this show. 1.00
01:16:21.000 Like, we have a great show. 0.96
01:16:23.000 Like, me and Santino, Saturday night, we had this fucking wild show at this arena in Cleveland. 0.97
01:16:29.000 It was awesome. 0.93
01:16:29.000 After it was over, we high-five, we get something to eat, and that's it. 0.93
01:16:34.000 Then you let it go.
01:16:35.000 You gotta let it go.
01:16:36.000 Because my thinking is...
01:16:38.000 I'm literally on the road every night.
01:16:41.000 And it's like, even though it's a different show every night and it's a different wonderful audience, I'm still thinking about the two shows we had at the Music Box in the Chicago Theater.
01:16:50.000 I'm like, oh my god, it was religious.
01:16:52.000 Of all the screenings I've ever had in my life, those two will stick out.
01:16:56.000 I think it's different, too, because you're playing a movie that you did.
01:16:58.000 You're putting out a piece, and you get to sit down and watch people enjoy the piece.
01:17:02.000 And you get to get this, like, big rush.
01:17:05.000 Like, ah, look at that. 0.99
01:17:06.000 Then I gotta go up and then do the fucking... 0.98
01:17:08.000 Yeah, but the Q&A is also... 0.99
01:17:10.000 But the Q&A is also organic.
01:17:12.000 You know, you're just being yourself.
01:17:13.000 You're having a good time.
01:17:15.000 It's definitely being yourself, but it's organic as you want it to be.
01:17:17.000 Like, basically, somebody asks you a question, and you're like, here's a long answer.
01:17:22.000 Maybe it had nothing to do with that question.
01:17:23.000 Right, but even then, it's like that...
01:17:26.000 It's not like you're doing a bit where you have to begin your set.
01:17:32.000 Thank you very much, Chicago.
01:17:33.000 Great to be here.
01:17:34.000 Here's the thing about Chicago.
01:17:36.000 Do you have memorized bits?
01:17:37.000 Oh, yeah.
01:17:38.000 There's bits, but they don't...
01:17:39.000 I was always blown away by Carlin.
01:17:42.000 One day, we were rehearsing on Dogma, and George Carlin was...
01:17:46.000 We had a smoke break. 0.99
01:17:47.000 It was the 90s, so everybody smoked cigarettes and shit. 0.98
01:17:50.000 I was like, what are you working on now, George, when you're not doing this? 0.99
01:17:54.000 And everybody was in the rehearsal. 0.99
01:17:55.000 Matt, Ben, Linda, Salma, Chris Rock, the whole fucking cast. 0.99
01:17:59.000 Me, Jay. 0.99
01:18:01.000 And George is like, oh, I'm working on this bit for the new HBO show.
01:18:05.000 He goes, it's called Advertising Lullaby.
01:18:08.000 And I said, what do you mean working on it?
01:18:09.000 And he goes, well, I'm memorizing it.
01:18:11.000 And I was like, you memorize your bits?
01:18:12.000 And he goes, yeah, I write everything.
01:18:14.000 I was like, you write your bits? 0.99
01:18:15.000 I always just thought you kind of came up with shit off the top of your head. 1.00
01:18:17.000 He goes, what are you, nuts? 1.00
01:18:18.000 He's like, I write everything and then I have to memorize everything like a script. 0.96
01:18:22.000 And then we were like, can you do it?
01:18:23.000 And he's like, yeah, you want to see it?
01:18:24.000 And so he did a command performance.
01:18:27.000 For the eight of us in the room of advertising Lullaby, and it was pitch perfect.
01:18:32.000 I saw the HBO show months later, and it was pitch perfect.
01:18:36.000 So I couldn't believe that that dude was as committed to the written word as he was, but he fancied himself a writer first and foremost.
01:18:44.000 He was a guy that didn't even want to do comedy, though.
01:18:46.000 He really backed into it.
01:18:48.000 He wanted to be Danny Kaye.
01:18:50.000 He wanted to act and stuff like that.
01:18:52.000 And he just happened to be funny.
01:18:54.000 First he did the radio DJ thing, and then the Hippie Dippie Weatherman.
01:18:57.000 Burns and Allen was prior to that and stuff.
01:18:59.000 But he kind of backed into comedy and was excellent at it, but it was not like, this is what I've always wanted to do since I was a kid.
01:19:08.000 He always seemed to accept the fact that he was like, oh, I'm...
01:19:11.000 This is it.
01:19:12.000 I'm a genius at this.
01:19:13.000 All right.
01:19:13.000 Well, he did it differently.
01:19:14.000 He would do...
01:19:16.000 I mean, he was probably the most prolific, big-name guy of all time.
01:19:20.000 And he actually inspired Louis C.K. to do A New Hour every year because that's what he did.
01:19:25.000 Carlin, yeah.
01:19:25.000 George did A New Hour every year.
01:19:28.000 And part of the reason why he did that...
01:19:30.000 He was on stage 275 nights a year.
01:19:33.000 That's crazy.
01:19:34.000 But part of the reason why is he owed a lot of money.
01:19:35.000 He did.
01:19:36.000 Big time debt. 1.00
01:19:37.000 Yeah, I don't know how that happened, but he fucked up. 0.99
01:19:39.000 In his book, Last Words, he talks about, like, he bought a jet. 0.99
01:19:42.000 He bought a jet? 0.98
01:19:44.000 In the 70s, he was that fucking huge, he bought a jet. 0.99
01:19:46.000 And he would sit on the runway in Long Island at a fucking LaGuardia. 0.99
01:19:53.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:19:54.000 And just do coke in the fucking plane. 1.00
01:19:56.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:19:57.000 His book, Last Words, is amazing.
01:20:00.000 They published it posthumously, but he was working on it with Tony Hendra.
01:20:05.000 Before he died, he was so awesome, man.
01:20:06.000 Like, I think about him all the time.
01:20:08.000 Anytime I jump on stage, because every night after a reboot, we get up on stage and work the crowd and stuff.
01:20:14.000 I got a chance to say hello to him once.
01:20:16.000 That was it.
01:20:17.000 Yeah?
01:20:18.000 Yeah, I met him at the comedy store.
01:20:20.000 He was very friendly.
01:20:21.000 Said hi to everybody.
01:20:22.000 Said hi to the door guys.
01:20:23.000 Hey, how are you?
01:20:23.000 Said hi to me.
01:20:24.000 Hey, hey, hey.
01:20:24.000 George Godwin, how are you?
01:20:25.000 He didn't know who the fuck I was. 0.99
01:20:27.000 He had no idea. 0.99
01:20:27.000 Just said hi. 0.99
01:20:28.000 I said, hey, man, how you doing?
01:20:30.000 And that's it.
01:20:31.000 That was our thing.
01:20:33.000 I mean, I worked with him a few times in the movies and stuff. 0.82
01:20:35.000 One of my favorite fucking memories of George Carlin is we go see him do a show, me and Chris Rock. 0.80
01:20:41.000 It was me and my wife, Jen, and Chris was married to his wife, Malak, at that point. 0.97
01:20:46.000 And George was playing at Caesars in Atlantic City.
01:20:50.000 And so he's like, I got seats for you guys up front and stuff.
01:20:53.000 So Rock had his role with the new. 1.00
01:20:56.000 He was fucking at the height of his game and shit. 0.99
01:20:59.000 And so we go see the show, and Carlin had a bit where he, it was like, people I could do without. 1.00
01:21:05.000 Like, guys named Skip, shit like that. 0.97
01:21:08.000 And one of them was, people I could do without. 0.99
01:21:12.000 Any man over the age of 12 who wears their baseball cap backwards.
01:21:16.000 Backwards.
01:21:17.000 So, you know, long before I met him, I'd always hear that bit and be like, ah.
01:21:22.000 So the night we're at the show, he's up there doing a bit and, you know, he's like, another person I could do without?
01:21:30.000 Kevin, you're exempt from this.
01:21:32.000 Guys over the age of 12 who wear their baseball cap backwards and my eyes lit up and Rock's next to me and Rock goes, he knows who you are, even though we'd worked together on the movie.
01:21:44.000 It was so fucking awesome.
01:21:46.000 It made you exempt, though. 0.94
01:21:48.000 For the show, because I was there.
01:21:51.000 Kind of sweet.
01:21:53.000 I think we got along because he wanted to act, and I was always like, come act, come play.
01:22:03.000 And in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, he plays a hitchhiker that blows people for rides.
01:22:10.000 And he was such a committed actor.
01:22:13.000 The day we shot him, we had him for a few hours, and then he had to rush off to go be on a stage and be Carlin.
01:22:18.000 So he made a little window of time for us.
01:22:21.000 And he came to me on set and he goes, Kevin, you're the writer-director of this.
01:22:25.000 I have a question for you.
01:22:26.000 I was like, okay. 0.98
01:22:27.000 And he goes, you know, it says that I'm fucking with these dudes. 0.92
01:22:31.000 I talk to them about the rules of the road. 1.00
01:22:33.000 Am I fucking with these idiots or do I believe in the rules of the road? 1.00
01:22:36.000 And I was like, well, I can't believe you're giving it this much fucking thought, George. 1.00
01:22:40.000 I said, but, like, the way I wrote it, I assumed the guy believed in the rules of the road. 0.95
01:22:45.000 And he goes, that's what I thought. 0.98
01:22:46.000 That's exactly what I fucking thought. 0.98
01:22:47.000 He was so, like, committed to performance, man. 0.98
01:22:51.000 Like, he was an absolute joy to be around.
01:22:54.000 And he was never on.
01:22:55.000 He's like you. 0.99
01:22:56.000 Like, fucking not like, hey, man, how about them donuts? 0.99
01:23:00.000 He doesn't feel the need to make you laugh. 0.99
01:23:01.000 I love Tracy Morgan to death, don't get me wrong, but, like, You gotta save six hours for facial, you know...
01:23:10.000 Cramps.
01:23:10.000 Rehabilitation, yes, because you're just...
01:23:12.000 You're laughing so hard. 0.99
01:23:13.000 You're laughing and your face is in that rictus grin the entire fucking time. 0.99
01:23:16.000 Dude, you ever made John Witherspoon? 0.99
01:23:17.000 Is he the same way?
01:23:18.000 Oh, my God. 0.99
01:23:19.000 I did a show with John Witherspoon and his son, JD, and my fucking face hurt after it was over. 0.98
01:23:24.000 It was, like, cramped up. 0.98
01:23:25.000 That's Morgan.
01:23:26.000 Like, my cheeks were hurting.
01:23:28.000 George was not that guy.
01:23:29.000 He could just sit there and have a conversation with him.
01:23:31.000 Like, he was just interesting.
01:23:32.000 Do you know Miss Pat?
01:23:34.000 Do I know?
01:23:35.000 Miss Pat.
01:23:35.000 Do you know who she is?
01:23:36.000 She's another one. 1.00
01:23:37.000 She'll make your fucking face hurt. 1.00
01:23:39.000 Really? 1.00
01:23:39.000 Oh my god, she's so funny. 1.00
01:23:41.000 Her stories are so crazy.
01:23:42.000 She had a real crazy life.
01:23:43.000 Did you listen to comedy albums back when you were a kid?
01:23:45.000 Oh yeah.
01:23:45.000 What were your jams?
01:23:47.000 Sam Kinison was my boy.
01:23:49.000 That's where I got the long coat for Silent Bob.
01:23:51.000 Trench coat, yes.
01:23:52.000 From Sam Kinison.
01:23:53.000 Well, I was introduced to comedy through my parents having Cheech and Chong albums.
01:23:58.000 Ah!
01:23:59.000 Cheech and Chong.
01:24:00.000 We have Chami Chong as in Jay and Silent Bob reboot.
01:24:02.000 And then Bill Cosby.
01:24:05.000 My dad gave me Bill Cosby albums.
01:24:07.000 And my mom would always be like, you can't listen to George Carlin, but you can listen to Bill Cosby because he's clean.
01:24:12.000 Isn't that funny?
01:24:13.000 In retrospect, how crazy is that?
01:24:17.000 I mean, how crazy is it?
01:24:18.000 He had a stellar reputation.
01:24:20.000 Oh, my God.
01:24:21.000 But, you know, when I was on news radio, I had heard that he drugged women.
01:24:25.000 Did you really?
01:24:26.000 Yes, yes.
01:24:27.000 That was the scuttlebutt at NBC? Yes, yes.
01:24:30.000 The scuttlebutt what? 1.00
01:24:31.000 And I might have heard it from Candy Alexander, who was always on top of shit. 1.00
01:24:36.000 She always had her fucking thumb to the pulse. 1.00
01:24:39.000 But... 1.00
01:24:41.000 Yeah, I heard.
01:24:42.000 I'm going wide-eyed because these are like rock star names.
01:24:45.000 Yeah, I'd heard.
01:24:46.000 I'd heard.
01:24:47.000 Yeah.
01:24:47.000 And I was like, what?
01:24:49.000 And they're like, hey, drugs women. 1.00
01:24:50.000 Never mind him.
01:24:51.000 Kenny Alexander.
01:24:51.000 That's a rock star name.
01:24:52.000 She's amazing.
01:24:52.000 I love her.
01:24:53.000 I love that lady to death. 1.00
01:24:55.000 That lady quit news radio because she wasn't getting a big enough part. 1.00
01:24:58.000 I remember.
01:24:58.000 Yeah, she was like, you know what?
01:24:59.000 I don't need to do this.
01:25:00.000 And she went off and wound up being on one of the CSIs or something like that.
01:25:04.000 Yeah, was it CSI? She was on a bunch of shit. 1.00
01:25:06.000 She's been in a million different things. 1.00
01:25:08.000 She's amazing.
01:25:09.000 She's a powerful woman. 1.00
01:25:12.000 Every time I'm here, we talk about it, but it was such an incredible assembly.
01:25:16.000 Did you see the 2020 that they did on Phil Hartman?
01:25:18.000 No.
01:25:19.000 They did a couple weeks ago, like a whole hour, 20 minutes on Phil Hartman and stuff.
01:25:26.000 I wouldn't watch it.
01:25:27.000 Oh.
01:25:28.000 When you didn't pop up in it, I was like, that's very Joe Rogan to not be involved in this.
01:25:32.000 I can't.
01:25:34.000 I don't even know if they asked.
01:25:35.000 I don't remember. 0.99
01:25:37.000 The other thing I wanted to ask you was the fucking fast-moving lights. 0.97
01:25:45.000 That the Air Force was like, capture video on. 0.98
01:25:49.000 What were your thoughts?
01:25:50.000 The moment I saw the video, I was like...
01:25:52.000 The podcast with Commander David Fravor that I had?
01:25:54.000 No.
01:25:55.000 Okay.
01:25:56.000 That's who you gotta...
01:25:57.000 You gotta watch that podcast, because he's the guy that was there.
01:26:00.000 He was in the plane?
01:26:01.000 Yes, he was the commander. 0.99
01:26:02.000 He was the guy who was in the fucking plane, who observed the thing. 0.99
01:26:06.000 He said whatever it was, it went from 60,000 feet to 50 feet in a matter of seconds. 0.99
01:26:12.000 Do you see me lighting up like a child? 1.00
01:26:14.000 Because this is the shit. 1.00
01:26:15.000 Remember In Search Of when we were kids? 1.00
01:26:17.000 Oh, yeah.
01:26:18.000 Leonard Nimoy.
01:26:19.000 Leonard Nimoy, yes. 0.99
01:26:19.000 Where they made you fucking believe. 0.99
01:26:21.000 When we were children, we believed in Sasquatch. 0.99
01:26:23.000 We believed in Loch Ness Monster.
01:26:24.000 We believed in aliens. 1.00
01:26:25.000 And then the internet got rid of shit. 0.99
01:26:27.000 The difference between this is... 0.99
01:26:28.000 What is this?
01:26:29.000 Whatever this object was...
01:26:32.000 Believe it or don't believe it.
01:26:33.000 Think that something is off about it.
01:26:36.000 It was actively blocking and jamming radar.
01:26:40.000 And it moved at a preposterous speed.
01:26:43.000 It went...
01:26:44.000 I don't remember how many miles.
01:26:46.000 They say like 30 miles inside of a second.
01:26:49.000 Some insane amount of speed it traveled.
01:26:51.000 They were trying to track this thing.
01:26:53.000 They couldn't.
01:26:54.000 I mean, it was moving.
01:26:55.000 No emissions.
01:26:56.000 No emissions.
01:26:57.000 No emissions.
01:26:58.000 No method of propulsion that made any sense.
01:27:00.000 No drone technology of any kind. 0.93
01:27:02.000 They don't know what the fuck it was, but they had seen several of them. 0.84
01:27:05.000 And the people around that area in San Diego off the coast of Mexico, the Air Force people, had seen several of them. 1.00
01:27:11.000 Fuck, this is... 1.00
01:27:12.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:27:12.000 I remember seeing this in the day this was in the news and I was like, why is this not like the front page fucking news story? 1.00
01:27:20.000 Well, New York Times wrote a big piece about it. 0.93
01:27:22.000 They did.
01:27:22.000 But you need to watch the podcast with Commander David Fravor.
01:27:26.000 That's the one.
01:27:26.000 David Fravor was the guy who was in the vehicle.
01:27:29.000 He saw it with his own eyes.
01:27:31.000 He observed it with the tracking equipment in the plane and he looked at it with his own eyes.
01:27:37.000 Wow.
01:27:37.000 And he said, it looked like a Tic Tac.
01:27:39.000 That guy is not full of shit. 1.00
01:27:40.000 And he is a high-level military guy. 1.00
01:27:42.000 He doesn't have a long history of this.
01:27:44.000 He's not seeking attention.
01:27:45.000 It was very difficult to get him to do this in the first place.
01:27:48.000 Jeremy Corbell, who made that documentary.
01:27:50.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:27:50.000 Bob Lazar in Area 51, Flying Saucers.
01:27:54.000 That...
01:27:55.000 That was a humbling experience listening to him talk about it because you could tell. 1.00
01:27:59.000 He's not full of shit. 0.99
01:28:00.000 He's telling you about a real experience he had that is impossible to describe. 0.99
01:28:03.000 And the fact that this thing was actively jamming radar.
01:28:06.000 People could say it's a this or it's a that or it's an anomaly.
01:28:09.000 Wait, what do they say?
01:28:10.000 What do they say?
01:28:11.000 It was actively jamming radar.
01:28:12.000 What do people say?
01:28:14.000 Oh, they moved it to 2x zoom, and that's why it looks like it took off quick.
01:28:18.000 No, they couldn't track it.
01:28:20.000 They couldn't stay on it.
01:28:21.000 It was moving too fast.
01:28:23.000 It didn't make any sense.
01:28:24.000 It took off at a preposterous rate of speed, and more importantly, it was actively jamming radar.
01:28:29.000 It was using equipment to jam their radar.
01:28:32.000 On purpose.
01:28:32.000 Yes, it was doing it.
01:28:34.000 It couldn't be like, perhaps, whatever its energy signature was created of radar bonding?
01:28:41.000 It was doing something to jam the radar.
01:28:43.000 It knew that they were trying to track it.
01:28:45.000 It didn't want to be found.
01:28:46.000 Exactly. 1.00
01:28:46.000 It was like, fuck off. 1.00
01:28:47.000 What do you think it is? 1.00
01:28:48.000 Fuck off with your nonsense. 1.00
01:28:48.000 I think it's from another planet. 1.00
01:28:49.000 That's what I think.
01:28:50.000 Come on, keep talking, boy.
01:28:52.000 It's either from another dimension or it's from another planet.
01:28:54.000 Wait, what?
01:28:55.000 It's more likely that it's from another planet.
01:28:58.000 Hold on.
01:28:59.000 What do you mean another dimension?
01:29:01.000 I think?
01:29:19.000 And it's entirely possible that if something lives a million years longer than human beings have existed and it continues to innovate and continues to create new technology, they can make technology that is indistinguishable from sorcery.
01:29:31.000 If you think about the way Bob Lazar explained it when he was working at Area 51, it's like if you took a nuclear reactor of today and showed it to some people from the Victorian era, they would think that it was magic.
01:29:44.000 And this is exactly how we were approaching these recovered crafts.
01:29:49.000 Because they were trying to back-engineer, according to Bob Lazar, whether you believe him or not, they were trying to back-engineer these crafts.
01:29:55.000 And they were saying that these crafts were operating on something called Element 115, which we didn't even know was a real thing.
01:30:03.000 I mean, they had speculated that it existed.
01:30:05.000 But he was talking about this in the late 80s and the 90s.
01:30:08.000 While they didn't even absolutely prove that Element 115 was real, I think it was 2013. So he's talking about something that the Air Force or the Navy or whoever the fuck was operating Area 51 and S4,
01:30:24.000 where he was, that they had this knowledge and understanding of this element that they had somehow or another made stable. 0.60
01:30:35.000 That could bend gravity.
01:30:37.000 It could change gravity.
01:30:38.000 So instead of being a propulsion system where you have a fire that comes out of the back of a thing and it forces the thing forward, this thing just pushed gravity in front of it and it shot through insane amounts of space and time with incredible speed that didn't even make any sense.
01:30:55.000 And they didn't understand how they made it.
01:30:58.000 They couldn't back engineer it.
01:30:59.000 So pushing gravity would You'd have to listen to him describe it.
01:31:02.000 I'm butchering it.
01:31:03.000 A lighting.
01:31:03.000 That would push it up, but then it also gives it propulsion as well.
01:31:07.000 I'm butchering it, for sure.
01:31:10.000 But the way he was describing it, there was something about this element 115 that utilized, when it was inside of the spaceship, it utilized gravity and some sort of an un...
01:31:23.000 In an impossible-to-understand way that they still have not figured out how to do it.
01:31:28.000 And he saw it in action?
01:31:29.000 Yeah, he saw it in action.
01:31:30.000 He saw it in action, and he was a propulsion expert from Los Alamos. 0.66
01:31:37.000 And he had worked on propulsion systems during his own free time, and he had worked on some nuclear projects at Los Alamos that was in the middle of concocting some top-secret military shit. 0.89
01:31:51.000 And he's clearly a brilliant guy. 0.75
01:31:53.000 But so many people try to discredit him, and maybe they're right, and maybe, I don't know.
01:31:58.000 I believe a lot of what he's saying.
01:32:00.000 If there are aliens, do you want to be here when they make contact?
01:32:03.000 Well, I think they're making contact whether we like it or not.
01:32:07.000 That's what I think.
01:32:08.000 I think they're looking and watching whether we like it or not.
01:32:11.000 They're observing.
01:32:11.000 And I think if you were an intelligent being from another planet, you would want to make sure that the Territorial monkeys don't blow each other up, and that's what we are.
01:32:20.000 We're like this adolescent stage of evolution where we still have all of our primal, territorial, jungle instincts, but yet we also have this insane ability to harness the atom.
01:32:32.000 We also have this ability to send videos through space.
01:32:36.000 We can catch them on your phone and play it back and forth.
01:32:39.000 We hold energy in these little rectangular devices that we hold in our pocket.
01:32:44.000 We charge them. 0.75
01:32:45.000 And we're charging them with fucking nuclear power that's You know, nuclear power plants are charging our phones, and then the phones go into our pockets, and we're like real close, you know? 0.94
01:32:55.000 We're real close to a lot of this crazy technological innovation, and it keeps getting more and more spectacular with every passing generation, and they're probably watching. 0.93
01:33:06.000 They're probably watching and waiting and trying to figure out what the fuck we're doing, and if you believe what they told Bob Lazar, that they were responsible for an accelerated evolution.
01:33:16.000 Wait, wait, wait, wait, come on, too much information. 0.95
01:33:18.000 One of the things they were saying— Who's they?
01:33:20.000 When he was working for—what is he working for, the Air Force?
01:33:22.000 Was it the Air Force that Lazar was working for?
01:33:26.000 Whatever the government body that was operating Area S4. They gave him a bunch of breakdowns on a lot of things they do and where they think they got these crafts from and where the crafts are.
01:33:39.000 One of them was from an archaeological dig, he said.
01:33:41.000 But they gave him an explanation of what these aliens are here for and what they're doing.
01:33:47.000 And one of the things that they said, and he said, I have no method of verifying whether or not this is true or not, but that they had accelerated the evolution of primitive primates.
01:33:56.000 So they had taken primitive primates and they had done something to them to change them from a primitive being to what we have now in Homo sapiens.
01:34:05.000 And that's us.
01:34:07.000 If you really look at evolution, the difference between Australopithecus and Homo sapien, it's only a few hundred thousand years, which is insane.
01:34:17.000 If you think of how much more advanced we are than those lower hominids, and there's no other animal that's experienced that kind of a leap. 1.00
01:34:27.000 The human brain doubled in brain size over a period of two million years.
01:34:32.000 We have no idea how.
01:34:33.000 We have no idea what happened.
01:34:35.000 It's all speculation, whether it's We're good to go.
01:34:52.000 That humans figured out a way to use an arm to throw and hit things and that accelerated our problem-solving skills.
01:34:59.000 There's a lot of theories.
01:35:01.000 We don't know.
01:35:02.000 Terence McKenna had a theory called the stoned ape theory.
01:35:05.000 He believed that human beings were experimenting with psilocybin mushrooms and that psilocybin mushrooms accelerated our evolution.
01:35:12.000 Who knows?
01:35:12.000 We don't know.
01:35:13.000 But one of the things that they were telling Lazar when he was working at S4, back engineering these crafts, were that human beings were the product of accelerated evolution, and that these space beings, and that there was more than one, there was more than one civilization that was involved in this,
01:35:29.000 these space beings had had some sort of a hand in this running experiment that is the evolution of man.
01:35:36.000 So then... 0.98
01:35:37.000 Whether or not that's true or not, who the fuck knows? 0.99
01:35:39.000 Totally. 0.98
01:35:39.000 So everyone's like, we might be in a simulation. 0.98
01:35:42.000 We're not, but at the same time, we could be somebody's simulation.
01:35:45.000 We could be a simulation, too.
01:35:47.000 I mean, Elon believes we're in a simulation.
01:35:49.000 And, you know, I had a philosopher on that was trying to explain to me the likelihood of assimilation.
01:35:57.000 And his – what was his name again?
01:35:59.000 How do you say it?
01:36:00.000 Nick Bostrom.
01:36:02.000 His perception was that if you look at the laws of probability, it's more likely that we are in assimilation than we're not. 1.00
01:36:10.000 And that was really hard for my stupid brain to accept. 0.91
01:36:15.000 If you look at the amount of planets that there are, if you look at the Fermi Paradox, like where are these planets? 0.99
01:36:22.000 If you look at the insane number of stars just in our galaxy alone, and then the insane number of galaxies in the universe, What are the odds that a life form hasn't gotten to the point where it can create a simulation that's indistinguishable from reality?
01:36:39.000 Well, the odds are very small.
01:36:41.000 So, if the odds are more likely that something has created a simulation that's indiscernible from reality, the odds are very likely that we're in it right now.
01:36:52.000 If we're in a simulation, we're in a pretty good version of it. 0.99
01:36:56.000 You and I are kicking ass. 0.99
01:36:57.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:36:58.000 We're doing great in the video game.
01:36:59.000 Exactly.
01:37:00.000 Jamie, you're doing well as well.
01:37:00.000 Thumbs up.
01:37:01.000 Not bad.
01:37:03.000 In the simulation, we were allowed to climb from a place to another place.
01:37:08.000 Yeah, we were making progress.
01:37:09.000 We're having fun. 0.98
01:37:10.000 We're not just playing fucking Pitfall. 0.99
01:37:12.000 No. 0.98
01:37:12.000 We're actually... 0.98
01:37:13.000 We're sims.
01:37:14.000 Think about what you were saying about loving being on stage and that great feeling of having all these people that have been entertained by your art.
01:37:22.000 And be able to sit there and watch what you create.
01:37:25.000 Being able to sit there and watch your movie and be able to sit there and watch all these people laugh at your work.
01:37:31.000 That's crazy.
01:37:32.000 That's a crazy great thing and so much better than your grandfather who was a janitor.
01:37:37.000 Think about that.
01:37:38.000 That is so much less rewarding.
01:37:41.000 Your life is infinitely more rewarding and more fortunate.
01:37:45.000 Wait, was he in the simulation as well then?
01:37:46.000 I'm sure.
01:37:47.000 Maybe that's a...
01:37:48.000 I don't know, man.
01:37:49.000 Or in a simulation, is it just like, give them some backstory so I didn't really have a grandfather?
01:37:53.000 It's all speculation.
01:37:54.000 Who knows?
01:37:55.000 Who knows?
01:37:56.000 Who knows that it changes every day? 0.95
01:37:58.000 I mean, when you wake up, you assume that these fucking weird, cloudy memories of the past are all realistic. 0.89
01:38:06.000 We don't know. 0.95
01:38:07.000 We don't even know if you ever have really gone to sleep.
01:38:09.000 We just know you have this memory of every night going to sleep.
01:38:12.000 We don't really know.
01:38:13.000 What do you mean?
01:38:13.000 That's why you're awake right now.
01:38:15.000 How the fuck do you know that what you've experienced in your past, all of it, wasn't just simulated? 0.96
01:38:22.000 And if it is simulated, wouldn't sleep be simulated as well? 0.99
01:38:26.000 Wouldn't all of it be simulated?
01:38:28.000 If you are just in this state, this state of perpetual simulation, where everything is existing all at once, but your mind puts it in this context of the day-to-day grind.
01:38:40.000 Get up in the morning.
01:38:41.000 I gotta hustle.
01:38:42.000 I gotta go out there and go out.
01:38:45.000 Get after it.
01:38:46.000 Maybe it's all nonsense.
01:38:47.000 Maybe you're all in this eternal neurological concoction, some thing that's forcing your brain to interact with these ideas and memories as if they're real.
01:39:02.000 It's unfair that I'm the only one stoned.
01:39:07.000 This is stoner talk. 1.00
01:39:09.000 This is good fucking talk. 1.00
01:39:10.000 Dude, I've been stoned for so many years. 1.00
01:39:12.000 I'm probably permanently stoned.
01:39:14.000 Even in Sober October?
01:39:16.000 Yeah, something.
01:39:17.000 Probably take me months to completely dry out.
01:39:20.000 If I took a test, I'd probably...
01:39:22.000 You didn't answer my question.
01:39:23.000 Do you want to be here for the aliens? 0.66
01:39:25.000 Yes, for sure.
01:39:26.000 Really?
01:39:27.000 Yeah.
01:39:27.000 What if they're hostile?
01:39:28.000 We are hostile.
01:39:30.000 So you think we could take them?
01:39:32.000 Nope.
01:39:33.000 No.
01:39:33.000 I mean, are the chimps going to take over the earth?
01:39:35.000 No. 1.00
01:39:36.000 Fucking vaporize those chimps. 1.00
01:39:37.000 It depends which movie you see. 1.00
01:39:38.000 We can fucking gun those chimps down. 1.00
01:39:40.000 And so, wait, would we gun down... 1.00
01:39:43.000 The alien invader?
01:39:44.000 I don't think so.
01:39:45.000 They'd probably be able to control us.
01:39:47.000 Our minds?
01:39:48.000 Yeah, just control everything.
01:39:50.000 They're probably impossible to even, like, isolate.
01:39:56.000 They could probably just take off and be gone.
01:39:58.000 Like, if you pointed a gun at them, they'd probably just disappear and be on the other side of the Earth in a matter of seconds.
01:40:04.000 I mean, we're talking about technology that's indistinguishable from magic, right?
01:40:09.000 Now you sound like Thor, man.
01:40:10.000 That's what they said in Thor.
01:40:11.000 Did they?
01:40:12.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:40:12.000 Like Thor, and they were like, you know, science and magic, what's the difference?
01:40:16.000 Well, it is.
01:40:17.000 Well, that is something that they've always said.
01:40:20.000 Isn't that what Aesimov said, too?
01:40:20.000 I'm not saying anything unique.
01:40:22.000 That's one of the things they've said about a certain level of technology.
01:40:26.000 Like, when you achieve a certain level of technology, I think it's a famous quote.
01:40:31.000 Aesimov, right?
01:40:31.000 But it has nothing to do with Thor.
01:40:33.000 It has something to do with scientists.
01:40:35.000 That a certain level of technology is indistinguishable from magic.
01:40:38.000 Yeah, I think that's an Aesimov.
01:40:40.000 Yeah.
01:40:40.000 Yeah, someone like that.
01:40:42.000 But that, if you hit a certain level of technology that's beyond your comprehension.
01:40:48.000 Right. 0.99
01:40:48.000 I mean, look, man, if you could just go to the 1800s with an iPhone, you'd be a fucking sorcerer. 0.99
01:40:52.000 Right? 0.99
01:40:53.000 True.
01:40:54.000 Here's, what's the, R3C Clock. 0.81
01:40:55.000 There we go.
01:40:56.000 Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
01:41:00.000 Clark's first law.
01:41:01.000 There it is.
01:41:01.000 That's it.
01:41:01.000 And that's the dude that wrote 2001?
01:41:03.000 Yes.
01:41:05.000 Um...
01:41:05.000 Was that it?
01:41:06.000 He wrote that, right?
01:41:07.000 Didn't he write?
01:41:07.000 Well, Kubrick made the movie.
01:41:09.000 He made the movie by I think Arthur.
01:41:10.000 Did he write it?
01:41:11.000 Clark wrote it.
01:41:13.000 But then again, I was like, Asimov.
01:41:15.000 Yep, 2001, Space Odyssey.
01:41:17.000 Ooh, I got one. 0.99
01:41:17.000 What a great fucking movie that was. 0.99
01:41:19.000 He wrote the screenplay. 0.99
01:41:20.000 What do you think happens then?
01:41:21.000 All right, so if we're in a simulation and we die, then we just cease to exist as a program.
01:41:26.000 If we're not in a simulation, if we're organic, little meat puppets and stuff, what's your take on the afterlife?
01:41:34.000 Does it just end?
01:41:35.000 I think any speculation about that, any speculation is just that.
01:41:40.000 It's just speculation.
01:41:41.000 You could just jerk yourself off all day trying to figure out what happens when you die. 0.91
01:41:45.000 That's kind of the idea. 0.71
01:41:46.000 You know, Richard Dawkins, I had him in here last week, and he was like, I think the lights go out.
01:41:51.000 And that's it.
01:41:52.000 Do you think the lights go out?
01:41:54.000 It's almost like challenging you.
01:41:55.000 I'm like, I don't know.
01:41:56.000 I don't think you know either.
01:41:57.000 It's not romantic enough.
01:41:59.000 You know what I'm saying?
01:42:00.000 But at the same time, it might just be me being arrogant going like, no, no, I can't just, the lights can't just go out.
01:42:06.000 I did so much work.
01:42:07.000 No one knows.
01:42:08.000 You have not experienced it.
01:42:09.000 So even his reductionist view of it is pure speculation.
01:42:14.000 He just decided to make it simple and logical.
01:42:17.000 I got close.
01:42:18.000 When I had my heart attack, the doctor said, you've got to have a widowmaker.
01:42:24.000 He goes, that means in 80% of the cases of 100% occlusion, the patient always dies.
01:42:30.000 He's like, but you're going to be the 20% because I'm good at my job. 0.96
01:42:32.000 And that's when he disappeared into my crotch, punched a hole, made magic. 0.87
01:42:35.000 So, Dr. Mark Leidenheim, if you're going to have a heart attack, find this guy. 0.92
01:42:40.000 I went to get a physical for Jay and Son Bob Reboot before you go make a movie.
01:42:44.000 If you're the director, they make you, and if you're the actors too, they make you get a physical and make sure you're not going to die during production.
01:42:50.000 So I saw this doctor, Dr. Paula, who, like I've seen for years whenever I make a movie, she's the movie physical doctor.
01:42:57.000 And when I came in, she was like, oh my god, you don't know how lucky you are.
01:43:02.000 And I was like, I know everyone's been telling me I'm lucky.
01:43:04.000 And she was like, no, no, no, let me tell you a story.
01:43:06.000 She's like, me, two other heart surgeons working on a heart patient in a hospital in the emergency room.
01:43:13.000 Suddenly, heart attack.
01:43:14.000 And I was like, guy had another heart attack?
01:43:16.000 She goes, no, the other doctor drops to the floor, has a massive heart attack.
01:43:20.000 Widowmaker like yours.
01:43:21.000 And I was like, well, I guess if you're going to have a heart attack, have one in the hospital surrounded by doctors, man.
01:43:27.000 They couldn't save him.
01:43:28.000 I said, did you save him?
01:43:29.000 She goes, that's the point.
01:43:30.000 We couldn't save him. 1.00
01:43:31.000 Holy shit. 1.00
01:43:32.000 We had all the equipment, we had all the expertise, and all of us were trained, but with the Widowmaker, it's not like, if I'm good at my job, I can save this motherfucker. 1.00
01:43:41.000 It's not even 50-50. 0.98
01:43:42.000 There's no logic to it.
01:43:44.000 It'll just go.
01:43:45.000 I got to pee so bad, I can't continue this conversation.
01:43:48.000 Talk to Jamie for one minute.
01:43:50.000 Part of the pride in doing Rogan's show is not having to pee.
01:43:58.000 I almost had two earlier.
01:44:00.000 Did you really?
01:44:00.000 You're holding it for me?
01:44:01.000 Yeah, I'm all good.
01:44:02.000 Well, I got a chance.
01:44:04.000 The weed, ladies and gentlemen.
01:44:06.000 Which camera's mine?
01:44:07.000 I can share that with you. 0.99
01:44:08.000 Fucking A. I'm not in sober October. 0.99
01:44:10.000 You're not taking part? 0.99
01:44:11.000 No, definitely not.
01:44:12.000 You're gonna smoke some of this, son.
01:44:13.000 It's called Snoogans.
01:44:15.000 It's called Berserker. 1.00
01:44:16.000 This is the hybrid.
01:44:17.000 Let's do Sativa since I still have 14. The Sativa?
01:44:19.000 Oh my god, you're gonna love it, man. 0.98
01:44:21.000 It's gonna fucking give you the wake up. 0.91
01:44:24.000 And there's a little comic strip inside each one, like a Bazooka Joe. 0.98
01:44:28.000 Awesome.
01:44:29.000 That came from my man, Micah Caviar.
01:44:31.000 This is definitely, you can find it at Herbarium.
01:44:33.000 You can find it in a bunch of weed legal states.
01:44:36.000 Snoogans, Snoochie Boochies, and Berserker.
01:44:39.000 Also, more importantly, Jay and Silent Bob Reboot.
01:44:41.000 I'm going to use this opportunity while he's taking a piss because I just get lost.
01:44:44.000 I'll let him roam. 0.99
01:44:45.000 I'm supposed to be selling shit, but I'm like, tell me about the aliens, Joe. 0.99
01:44:49.000 This is why I come here, to be entertained one-on-one. 0.98
01:44:52.000 But Jay and Silent Bob Reboot, man, if you want to go see the movie with me and Jay, we're traveling for the next 55 dates with the movie up until February.
01:45:04.000 You watch it with us.
01:45:05.000 We do a Q&A. It's a good time, man.
01:45:08.000 Rebootroadshow.com, that's the address for tickets and stuff.
01:45:11.000 It's also opening in all the areas that we've went.
01:45:15.000 So we went to Jersey, Chicago, Detroit, Grand Rapids last week, and then it opened in Chicago, New Jersey, yeah.
01:45:25.000 And in Illinois, New Jersey, and Michigan in theaters.
01:45:29.000 So this week, November 1st, it's opening on a bunch of screens following the places that we've actually went to.
01:45:39.000 So let me see.
01:45:42.000 Opening November 1st, Minneapolis at AMC Arbor Lakes, Houston at the AMC Willowbrook and the AMC Gulf Point 30, in Columbus, Ohio at the Gateway Film Center, in Des Moines at the Century W, Des Moines-Jordan Creek, in St. Louis at the AMC West Isle of San Antonio,
01:46:00.000 at the Regal Cielo Vista.
01:46:03.000 So every place we go with the movie, Me and Jay, then the movie opens up.
01:46:08.000 In our wake.
01:46:09.000 So if you don't want to see it with us at RebootRoadShow.com, you can go to Fandango.com, just enter Jay and Sal and Bob, Reboot, and see if it's playing near you.
01:46:18.000 It's a good time.
01:46:19.000 It's a heartwarming film.
01:46:20.000 Every night for me going to watch this movie is like being in church where I'm the priest and also the person they're celebrating.
01:46:26.000 Have you made a deal with iTunes or Amazon?
01:46:31.000 Saban Films has the movie domestically and they've got an output deal with somebody, I think Amazon.
01:46:36.000 And then Universal has the movie Abroad.
01:46:39.000 We're opening in the UK November 29th or something like that.
01:46:43.000 I'm going over there at Thanksgiving. 1.00
01:46:46.000 Yeah, fucking smoking. 1.00
01:46:47.000 No, I got some, man. 1.00
01:46:48.000 It's all you.
01:46:49.000 To tour there as well for a week in England.
01:46:52.000 So it's got homes and stuff, but the reason we go out on tour was because, like you, I got an audience, man.
01:47:01.000 I can count on the audience, and I live off that audience like Normally me and Jay are just out there.
01:47:05.000 I'm doing Q&A or stand-up or whatever.
01:47:09.000 So like going out with the movie, like the budget of the movie was like, we shot it in New Orleans.
01:47:15.000 So it's like 10 million, but you get money back.
01:47:17.000 So it's like 8 million.
01:47:18.000 We needed 8 million bucks.
01:47:19.000 So we got some money from Saban for the domestic rights.
01:47:22.000 We got some money from Universal.
01:47:24.000 For the overseas rights.
01:47:25.000 But then there was equity financing we had to pull together like a missing two, three million bucks to make up the budget and stuff.
01:47:32.000 And that's where you get money from real people.
01:47:35.000 People are like, I'm going to invest in a movie and hope I get my money back or if not make it and stuff. 0.65
01:47:39.000 And those people always get fucked in this business, never make their money back, ever.
01:47:43.000 But the tour, I was able to assure those people, I'm like, within one year of the date we start the movie, you're gonna get your money back. 0.87
01:47:51.000 Because I knew I could take the movie out on tour, and as long as I was willing to live with it, We can get all that equity financing back. 0.98
01:47:58.000 So one year from the date of my heart attack, we started shooting Jay and Silent Bob Reboot as a big fuck you to the heart attack. 0.60
01:48:05.000 One year from the date we started shooting Jay and Silent Bob Reboot, I'm going to be able to pay off my equity investors. 0.96
01:48:10.000 That's fucking unheard of in this business, but I only get to do that because of the audience that we built up, because the audience will come out and support us.
01:48:17.000 And I was told a long time ago, if you work for the audience, you'll never work a day in your life. 0.98
01:48:23.000 Absolutely fucking true. 0.90
01:48:24.000 I've had not a boss. 0.97
01:48:25.000 And then I meet the bosses every night at the show, and they're beautiful.
01:48:29.000 They're fantastic.
01:48:30.000 They are my boss. 1.00
01:48:31.000 They give me money, just like a boss gives you money and shit. 1.00
01:48:33.000 And they'll let you know if you're fucking up. 1.00
01:48:35.000 You know the audience will fucking tell you. 0.99
01:48:37.000 Your boss will let you know. 0.98
01:48:38.000 But this tour with this movie, we banged out a tiny record, because we don't have marketing money.
01:48:45.000 It's one thing to get money to make the movie. 0.84
01:48:47.000 Then it usually costs double what you spent to make the movie, to market the movie, to tell people it's coming, to put it up on screens and shit.
01:48:53.000 So we were lucky enough to get the 8 million to make the movie. 0.97
01:48:55.000 We weren't going to get fucking 15 to market the movie. 0.98
01:48:58.000 That's crazy. 0.99
01:48:59.000 And that's generally what happens.
01:49:00.000 So we just had to be smarter about it. 0.98
01:49:02.000 And since I tour anyway with the podcast, I'm like, oh, let's use this fucking model and expand it. 0.92
01:49:07.000 So we hit a little record with our opening weeks. 0.93
01:49:10.000 We did the opening day of the tour was in New Jersey at Asbury Park at the Paramount.
01:49:15.000 And we did like 93,000 on one screen.
01:49:18.000 So we got like a We're good to go.
01:49:41.000 The brains of our operation.
01:49:43.000 We thought like we could count on the audience.
01:49:45.000 We'll take the movie out on tour and stuff like that.
01:49:48.000 And it's really been working out and it's nice that like some business people are being like, hey, good job.
01:49:52.000 Like people are going like, oh, they figured out their niche and they've been doing – we've been doing this for years.
01:49:57.000 We did it with Red State years ago.
01:49:58.000 Remember we toured that as well. 0.95
01:50:00.000 So it's great if you got, like, most filmmakers wouldn't bother because they're like, I'm just going to put in a bunch of theaters and shit and let the studio pay for it.
01:50:07.000 And I don't have a studio, so I got to take my movie to the people and four-wall it.
01:50:11.000 But I'll be honest with you, like, I started as an indie filmmaker, so that's in my blood.
01:50:16.000 And there's something insanely gratifying about sitting there with the audience.
01:50:19.000 I never had that early in my career.
01:50:21.000 They just put the movie on a bunch of screens.
01:50:22.000 You'd hear, number-wise, how you did.
01:50:24.000 But being in the room... 1.00
01:50:25.000 It's fucking religious. 0.99
01:50:26.000 It seems like you miss out on all the stress of all the other aspects of movie making. 1.00
01:50:31.000 The thing I used to hate the most, man, is you spend your time trying to make a movie.
01:50:36.000 You dream like, I want to see it up on the silver screen. 1.00
01:50:38.000 You have these movie dreams and shit. 0.99
01:50:39.000 And then you have to make it a reality. 0.99
01:50:41.000 If you're lucky...
01:50:41.000 You get to make the movie a reality.
01:50:43.000 If you're lucky, it gets a release. 0.96
01:50:45.000 If you're lucky, you spend opening weekend not celebrating like, we fucking did it. 0.89
01:50:50.000 We did a thing that not everybody ever fucking does. 0.97
01:50:54.000 Who are we? 0.98
01:50:54.000 We're chimps and we figured it out. 0.98
01:50:56.000 But instead, we'd spend every fucking waking moment of opening weekend going, how much did it make? 0.95
01:51:01.000 Who's going? 0.96
01:51:01.000 Are people going? 0.96
01:51:03.000 It's not making enough? 1.00
01:51:04.000 Fuck, we've got to drive more business. 1.00
01:51:06.000 And suddenly, the joy of what you were seeking is fucking gone because you're mired in the business. 1.00
01:51:11.000 And if you're lucky, if you're the Avengers, you get a month at the box office. 0.85
01:51:15.000 That's about it before everyone moves on to something else.
01:51:18.000 If you're a Kevin Smith movie, you don't even get a weekend. 0.96
01:51:20.000 You get a day if you're fucking lucky. 0.99
01:51:23.000 And so suddenly all that dreaming took me five years to make this movie and living through a fucking heart attack. 0.99
01:51:28.000 Comes down to one day at the box office. 1.00
01:51:30.000 Fuck that, man. 1.00
01:51:31.000 Like, tilt the table in your favor. 1.00
01:51:33.000 So I said, I'm going to take myself out of that box office race and instead do this.
01:51:38.000 Like...
01:51:38.000 What I'm losing in, well, I don't have marketing and stuff, but what I'm losing in a mass release of the movie, I make up for it by being able to accompany the movie myself, and that makes it a premium event.
01:51:49.000 It eventizes it.
01:51:50.000 It's an idea that I stole from Eddie Izzard. 0.96
01:51:52.000 I remember when I fell in love with Eddie Izzard's stuff, I was like, Eddie Izzard's literally just doing fucking stand-up in a big theater with a costume on.
01:51:59.000 Like, he's just doing stand-up that you would do with fucking improv and stuff, but, like, he eventized it. 0.92
01:52:04.000 He turned it into something. 0.94
01:52:05.000 It's a one-man show, as opposed to, like, he's doing 90 minutes of stand-up.
01:52:09.000 So for us, we were like, let's take the movie out on the road and eventize it. 0.96
01:52:12.000 If you're next to the movie, people are like, oh shit, the director's there. 0.98
01:52:15.000 If I bring Jay, they're like, oh shit, Jay and Silent Bob are there as well. 0.99
01:52:18.000 So it's been like a blast, but you just have to be willing to put the time in. 0.98
01:52:22.000 And some people are like, yeah, you could do this.
01:52:24.000 But I'm like, yeah, we could do it because we've been doing it for like a quarter, man.
01:52:27.000 25 years since Clerks happened.
01:52:29.000 And from day one, I've been engaged with the audience.
01:52:32.000 Long before it was fashionable or profitable just because...
01:52:36.000 Why else wouldn't I want to?
01:52:37.000 Like in the early beginnings, I was like, my friend Ming Chen, the guy from Comic Book Men, he built a website and I was like, can you put up like a thing where I could do Q&A all the time with the video?
01:52:47.000 Is that possible?
01:52:48.000 He goes, no, because it was like 1995. And he goes, but I can put up a message board.
01:52:53.000 And it was like a whiteboard like Reddit.
01:52:55.000 He's like, people could put up, it was long before Reddit existed, people could put up messages and then you could look at them anytime you want.
01:53:01.000 Three in the morning you can respond to them. 0.85
01:53:03.000 And I realized I'm never going to fucking be alone again in this life, man.
01:53:06.000 I'll always be able to reach out to somebody who's like, hey man, I saw your movie, I got a question for you. 0.97
01:53:11.000 And boom, there's a connection and shit like that. 0.87
01:53:14.000 So since 95, I've been in it online with the audience. 0.97
01:53:18.000 I remember when I started, it was me and Peter Jackson were the only two filmmakers on the web.
01:53:23.000 And then Peter Jackson got smart and was like, if I'm on the web, I ain't winning Oscars.
01:53:26.000 And he went off and had a great career. 0.91
01:53:28.000 I'm still on the fucking web because I love connecting with the people that you're trying to reach. 0.93
01:53:34.000 I don't do it in a vacuum going like... 0.98
01:53:37.000 Good filmmakers like David Fincher, they make a thing and they put a movie out there and they don't fucking go follow it.
01:53:43.000 They let the movie speak for itself.
01:53:45.000 I'm the other guy who's like, when the movie's done, I run out. 0.99
01:53:47.000 I'm like, hold on, let me tell you the story of how it all fucking happened and shit. 0.99
01:53:50.000 But people love it. 0.99
01:53:51.000 It's a different vibe.
01:53:52.000 It's our little niche.
01:53:52.000 It's our little thing.
01:53:54.000 And it works incredibly well for us.
01:53:56.000 So the tour... 0.92
01:53:57.000 Every night last week was like fucking sold out and it just felt like amazing. 0.98
01:54:02.000 And as the tour unrolls, we were going to fly from place to place and then I was like, let's just fucking drive. 0.97
01:54:07.000 Let's do it punk style. 0.56
01:54:09.000 So we've been driving around. 0.99
01:54:11.000 Yeah, we got a little SUV and we've been trucking around and it's fucking glorious, man. 0.97
01:54:15.000 I'm 49. You don't get this at 49. This is the shit you're supposed to do in your 20s. 0.98
01:54:19.000 Right. 1.00
01:54:20.000 Post heart attack, now I'm like, well, like, post heart attack, I didn't go crazy where I'm like, give me all the pussy in the world and shit. 0.99
01:54:26.000 Like, nothing really changed for me, but I did become very cognizant of like, you know, my wife hates when I say it, but I'm like, I'm living on borrowed time. 0.99
01:54:35.000 I know for a fact, my old man fucking died after the second heart attack. 0.95
01:54:38.000 We're all living on borrowed time. 0.99
01:54:40.000 Act accordingly.
01:54:40.000 I'm just acutely aware of it because I was so fucking close to the moment.
01:54:44.000 So it's not so much like I'm having a midlife crisis, not by any stretch of the imagination, but anything that allows you to feel young, vital, makes you feel like, oh, yeah, this is why I started shit like this. 0.96
01:54:55.000 Or it's fun. 0.89
01:54:57.000 We're making a living.
01:54:58.000 It's crazy.
01:54:59.000 We're on the road all the time, and I've been saying all week, this is the best vacation I've had in years, even though we're working sometimes three times, three shows in a day.
01:55:07.000 Because it never feels like work.
01:55:09.000 I'm just driving around. 0.99
01:55:09.000 My whole job is to go to a theater and fucking show the movie to people and stuff. 0.99
01:55:13.000 It's really fucking dope. 0.99
01:55:15.000 That's awesome, man. 0.97
01:55:16.000 I'm happy for you.
01:55:17.000 Thank you.
01:55:18.000 You always are, man.
01:55:19.000 I am.
01:55:19.000 I am.
01:55:20.000 Always.
01:55:20.000 How was the piss?
01:55:21.000 It was great.
01:55:22.000 I needed it.
01:55:23.000 I know.
01:55:23.000 You always get there.
01:55:24.000 I was hanging in there as long as I could.
01:55:25.000 I was starting to get weird pains. 0.99
01:55:29.000 You don't want dick troubles. 0.99
01:55:30.000 Not at our age. 0.99
01:55:31.000 I couldn't concentrate.
01:55:32.000 You want good, steady flow. 0.96
01:55:35.000 What I'm walking away from this session with you is that I... No bullshit.
01:55:40.000 I think when I'm done with the tour, I'm going to...
01:55:43.000 Start working out.
01:55:44.000 Yeah. 0.86
01:55:44.000 But not like, you know, get Chappelle big and shit like that. 0.86
01:55:46.000 Yeah, don't get crazy. 0.98
01:55:47.000 Just some muscle tone.
01:55:49.000 I think I need to do, let me see, I'm 49, I turn 50 in August. 0.99
01:55:53.000 I gotta be able to do a fucking pull-up before I'm 50. You can do that. 0.99
01:55:56.000 That's totally achievable.
01:55:58.000 Strength training.
01:55:58.000 Where were you in high school?
01:55:59.000 Like, I could have used that kind of like, you can do that, Kev. 1.00
01:56:02.000 Instead, everyone's like, fucking fatty, get off the bar and shit. 1.00
01:56:05.000 Well, some people have a different approach. 1.00
01:56:07.000 They were, I know.
01:56:08.000 You've got that Zen Yoda Rogan approach.
01:56:10.000 I do now.
01:56:12.000 Where's your show tonight?
01:56:13.000 Comedy store.
01:56:14.000 Two shows.
01:56:15.000 You know what you're gonna do?
01:56:17.000 Yeah.
01:56:18.000 Do you do the same show both times?
01:56:21.000 No, no.
01:56:22.000 I have some new stuff that I have to work in, so I'll try to figure out how to do it. 0.99
01:56:25.000 These shows in town, there's a lot of fucking around. 0.95
01:56:28.000 What percentage will repeat? 1.00
01:56:30.000 Depends.
01:56:30.000 Do you have a killer bit where you're like, I'm going to open with this, and then I'll try the new stuff?
01:56:34.000 You always try to open with something that's proven.
01:56:37.000 That works.
01:56:37.000 But sometimes not.
01:56:39.000 Sometimes there's a thought that gets in my head, like right before I go up, I'm like, let's see what this works.
01:56:43.000 So wait a second.
01:56:44.000 Because a comedy store is a gem, basically.
01:56:46.000 To work out?
01:56:47.000 Yeah.
01:56:48.000 I mean, you get paid, but really it's a gem.
01:56:50.000 You're probably at a point in your career now where you don't even have to come up with shit to do on late nights because you don't even have to do...
01:56:57.000 When was the last time you did a late night thing? 0.66
01:56:59.000 Yeah, I don't do those too often. 0.99
01:57:00.000 I was going to say, you've got your own fucking audience. 0.99
01:57:03.000 I fucking love you, dude. 0.99
01:57:04.000 You cracked the code. 0.97
01:57:07.000 You built a thing and you were like, I'm going to build my own thing. 1.00
01:57:11.000 You're like the Coen brothers of this bitch. 0.99
01:57:13.000 Coen brothers were like, we're going to do our own thing. 1.00
01:57:16.000 And it's fucking weird. 0.93
01:57:17.000 And it doesn't work like your thing at all. 0.98
01:57:19.000 But we're going to stand over here and we're going to keep doing it.
01:57:22.000 And slowly, the whole industry gravitated toward them.
01:57:26.000 They stood outside of it and then everybody started doing their sensibility, their sense of humor, their type of casting. 1.00
01:57:33.000 You're the same fucking thing. 1.00
01:57:35.000 And I watched it in fucking real time. 1.00
01:57:37.000 You built a thing and you were content to be like... 0.99
01:57:40.000 I'm happy with this. 0.99
01:57:42.000 I don't need to fucking chase this or that. 0.94
01:57:44.000 I'm building a thing. 0.96
01:57:45.000 And now you've been rewarded by being at a place where you don't have to go anywhere to promote whatever it is you want to do. 0.98
01:57:52.000 You literally do it fucking here, feeding your own machine. 0.98
01:57:56.000 Think about it. 1.00
01:57:57.000 Instead of jumping on some Tonight Show or something like that and giving them ratings...
01:58:01.000 You feed your own beast by being like, oh, I'm going to be here, come see the show.
01:58:05.000 You know what's really crazy?
01:58:06.000 I don't even do that.
01:58:07.000 What do you mean?
01:58:08.000 I don't talk about my gigs.
01:58:09.000 I just do it through social media.
01:58:11.000 You never on this?
01:58:13.000 Very rarely.
01:58:15.000 Bill Maher does it at the end of every episode.
01:58:17.000 He's always like, hey man, I'm going to a gig tonight.
01:58:20.000 He doesn't have social media, I don't think.
01:58:22.000 If he does, he's not on it very strongly.
01:58:24.000 I just post stuff up on Instagram.
01:58:26.000 That's what I do too, man.
01:58:27.000 But I would assume with this, it's like, you know.
01:58:30.000 Yeah, I mean, I talk about it casually.
01:58:32.000 Like, I'm in Houston.
01:58:35.000 And then, no, Dallas on November 15th and Houston on the 16th.
01:58:40.000 There you go.
01:58:40.000 I just did it.
01:58:42.000 I didn't want to force you into it, man.
01:58:44.000 Listen, man, I love what you do.
01:58:47.000 I love the fact that you're living in this vibe.
01:58:49.000 You know, you've got this thing that you're doing where you make your films, you promote your films, you go on tour with them.
01:58:54.000 And I like that you...
01:58:56.000 Switch it up, too.
01:58:57.000 Like, Red Stay is one of my favorite movies, man. 0.97
01:58:59.000 I fucking loved that movie because it was so crazy. 0.96
01:59:01.000 It's weird. 0.98
01:59:02.000 And I didn't have any idea what to expect when I sat down to see that.
01:59:05.000 But I love that you've got that sort of artistic freedom.
01:59:08.000 You do what seems like a thing to do. 0.97
01:59:11.000 You know, it's masturbatory, I guess, on some level. 0.79
01:59:14.000 It's creative is what it is. 0.99
01:59:16.000 As long as people enjoy watching me masturbate, I'm all right with that. 0.99
01:59:19.000 I think people like watching you beat off. 0.99
01:59:21.000 You know, tip my jar.
01:59:23.000 Yeah.
01:59:23.000 You know, I'm a cam kid.
01:59:25.000 Thank you, brother.
01:59:26.000 You're amazing.
01:59:27.000 Thank you for having me.
01:59:28.000 Kevin Smith, ladies and gentlemen.
01:59:29.000 Goodbye.