The Joe Rogan Experience - April 21, 2020


Joe Rogan Experience #1461 - Owen Smith

Topics
bad dog experiences Luda Halle Berry workouts student loans learning Chinese economics Stacey Abrams presidential run coronavirus travel restrictions Vinny Pazienza boxing nights food culture sriracha almonds racism slavery suppression racism Baltimore police slavery black codes Native American history politics red states and blue atheism and religion benefits meat and mental health Tiger King Felicia Oh choking Seymour Butts Radio Lab acid experiments and soldiers performing in front of people again charity shows
Hosted by
Joe Rogan
Guests
Owen Smith
Mentioned
Owen Smith TV Joe Biden Trump Jamie Bernard Hopkins Michelle Obama Steve Rinella Mike Tyson Bill Gates Dude Roy Jones Jr. Halle Berry Luda Jesus Christ John Roberts Dick Cheney D'Artagnan Samisu Desne Ellen Vinny Pazienza and 91 more
Joe Rogan Experience #1460 - Donnell Rawlings Joe Rogan Experience #1462 - Kurt Metzger

Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 51 minutes

Words per minute

188.58

Word count

32,298

Sentence count

4,243

Harmful content

Misogyny

116

sentences flagged

Toxicity

948

sentences flagged

Hate speech

81

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, the boys talk about the latest in the Ebola outbreak, the controversy surrounding the use of swab tests, and a new study on the mortality rate of Ebola. Also, the guys talk about what they would do if they were infected with Ebola and how they would deal with it. Don't miss it! Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. All rights reserved. Used by permission. The opinions and thoughts expressed here are our own, not those of our companies, unless otherwise specified. Please do not use this content without written permission from us. We do not own the rights to any of the music used in this episode. This content was produced, produced, and edited by Donnell. Donnell and I are not affiliated with any of these companies, the music and content used is our own and is not the property of our respective record labels. Thank you for any amount you can manage. If you like what you hear, please consider supporting us by becoming a patron patron patron or supporter of our content. We make no claim of any of our products or services. We are not compensated for this content, other than those listed below. Thanks to our sponsorships, we do not endorse any products mentioned in the content. Also, thank you for your support and support our efforts. in any way you can be reached directly or indirectly through our social media platforms. . We appreciate the support we receive through this podcast. You can be a supporter of the podcast and all of our efforts, we thank you, and we appreciate your support us in any amount we can be supported in any other way we can manage to do so. Thank you. we appreciate you, we appreciate it, we really appreciate it and we really do appreciate it. We really appreciate the love, we truly do appreciate all of your support. and appreciate the attention we get from everyone else. , we appreciate all the love and support we get back and support you back and appreciate it back and truly appreciate it in return. it really means a lot. - Thank you, Thank you so much. It really means the support us, we are truly appreciate you. We appreciate it greatly. Timestamps: 1:30 - The boys. 2:00 - It's all good. 3:15 - We'll get back soon.

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:01.000 Owen Smith!
00:00:02.000 Hey! 0.99
00:00:03.000 How you feeling?
00:00:04.000 I feel good, man.
00:00:06.000 I'm excited.
00:00:07.000 Cheers.
00:00:08.000 Cheers, man.
00:00:09.000 Salute.
00:00:09.000 Come on, man.
00:00:10.000 Salute.
00:00:10.000 Yeah.
00:00:10.000 We just tested Owen.
00:00:13.000 Yes.
00:00:13.000 Negative.
00:00:14.000 There's apparently been some controversy about this, so just let me let everybody know right away.
00:00:19.000 There's no shortage of antibody tests.
00:00:22.000 What we're using, there's no shortage of them.
00:00:25.000 People saying, why are the people on the front lines?
00:00:27.000 It's just misunderstanding and confusion.
00:00:30.000 These tests, there's no shortage of.
00:00:32.000 I understand some people in some places have a hard time getting access to the test.
00:00:38.000 That's not the case here.
00:00:40.000 So, I take it upon myself to test everybody as they come into the studio.
00:00:44.000 This is not taking away from anybody that's on the front lines.
00:00:47.000 It's not taking tests away from any medical workers.
00:00:50.000 The tests that they would use for them, particularly, they're using swabs. 0.96
00:00:55.000 I mean, look, man, those fucking people that are working in those hospitals and the medical workers, those people are legit heroes. 0.85
00:01:02.000 And if I found out that there was something we were doing that was somehow or another taking away from their ability to be tested, I would never do it. 0.98
00:01:10.000 So people got upset.
00:01:12.000 Apparently, because, well, also people writing articles about things, because there's, you know, it's like it's a hot topic.
00:01:19.000 Right.
00:01:19.000 And they're home, too.
00:01:20.000 Yeah.
00:01:21.000 But I get it.
00:01:22.000 I get it.
00:01:23.000 I'm not hating.
00:01:23.000 I'm not mad.
00:01:24.000 I get it.
00:01:25.000 You know, but when I posted that Donnell and I were rona-free, people were like, someone posted some story.
00:01:31.000 Well, here's what's hilarious. 0.98
00:01:33.000 I'd go out of my way to not read comments, and these motherfuckers are writing stories where they're taking comments from Instagram and using them as quotes. 1.00
00:01:42.000 Just some random magoo that's posting something. 0.98
00:01:46.000 One of them said that we were low-key flexing that we had tests.
00:01:52.000 That's hilarious.
00:01:53.000 That's just someone just looking to use the term low-key flexing, and they don't have any place for it.
00:01:59.000 So like, I think he's low-key flexing, and he's got a corona test.
00:02:02.000 So it's a test that tests you for antibodies.
00:02:07.000 And you were laughing at my face the entire time.
00:02:08.000 Higher time.
00:02:09.000 You're a little nervous.
00:02:10.000 You're a little nervous, but...
00:02:12.000 There also, there was something that I shared with you earlier today.
00:02:15.000 There was a new study that...
00:02:17.000 Jamie, see if you can pull up that study.
00:02:19.000 It is out of...
00:02:20.000 I think it's out of UCLA. Is that what it's out of?
00:02:25.000 It's...
00:02:27.000 It says early antibody tests indicate far more cases and a much lower mortality rate.
00:02:33.000 So they think there's at least 400,000 people have been infected in California.
00:02:42.000 So the mortality rate is way, way lower than they previously thought it was.
00:02:48.000 At least in California, you know, it obviously varies.
00:02:51.000 This is a crazy disease.
00:02:52.000 It's crazy.
00:02:53.000 It doesn't make any sense.
00:02:54.000 It varies depending upon your physical condition, whether or not you've been smoking, whether or not...
00:03:00.000 There's apparently a great benefit to exercising regularly, even while you have it, if you catch it, exercising. 0.98
00:03:06.000 But then there was this fucking crazy thing. 0.98
00:03:08.000 What is that guy's name? 0.99
00:03:09.000 The Fox thing?
00:03:10.000 Oh, yeah.
00:03:11.000 Put up...
00:03:11.000 We'll do the first...
00:03:13.000 It's LA Times and it's got the subscription blocker on it. 1.00
00:03:16.000 Oh, the sons of bitches. 1.00
00:03:17.000 Here, I'll send you another one. 1.00
00:03:19.000 There's one on LA.com.
00:03:22.000 Oh, I belong to LA Times.
00:03:24.000 I can give you mine.
00:03:25.000 Look at you.
00:03:26.000 I support journalism.
00:03:28.000 I do too, but not LA Times.
00:03:30.000 I like that.
00:03:31.000 It reads like movies.
00:03:32.000 I get it.
00:03:33.000 I just don't have the time for that.
00:03:35.000 Here it goes.
00:03:36.000 Early antibody test indicates far more COVID-19 cases, lower mortality rate.
00:03:43.000 There's a decrease in the number of deaths.
00:03:45.000 The study indicates that there could be hundreds of thousands of people could be infected without knowing it.
00:03:49.000 That's what's so weird about it.
00:03:50.000 Let me ask you this question, though.
00:03:51.000 Can you explain mortality rate?
00:03:54.000 Yes.
00:03:55.000 The amount of people that get it, how many of them die? 1.00
00:03:57.000 So if it's a high mortality rate, it's like, you're fucked. 1.00
00:03:59.000 Right, like Ebola. 1.00
00:04:01.000 Right.
00:04:01.000 Vicious mortality rate.
00:04:03.000 Yes.
00:04:04.000 Rabies, the worst, 100%.
00:04:05.000 Yes.
00:04:06.000 Rabies is like 99.99%.
00:04:08.000 The only time, if they catch it before the symptoms set in, you survive.
00:04:13.000 You can survive.
00:04:14.000 But if they don't catch it before the symptoms set in, like if you just get rabies, you don't get over it on your own.
00:04:19.000 That's right.
00:04:19.000 You have to get the medication.
00:04:20.000 Every black person I know always crosses the street when they see a random dog.
00:04:25.000 It's like, living in these communities and people don't have their dog, but you should go, it's okay, he's safe. 1.00
00:04:31.000 We're like, man, fuck that. 1.00
00:04:32.000 Dude, I've been bitten by dogs. 1.00
00:04:34.000 Fuck that. 1.00
00:04:34.000 It's like, I'm gonna take your word for this? 1.00
00:04:37.000 Nobody loves dogs more than me.
00:04:38.000 I love dogs, but random dogs.
00:04:41.000 You never know what someone did to that dog.
00:04:43.000 You never know how people treat that dog.
00:04:45.000 And I've had a bunch of sketchy dogs.
00:04:48.000 I've had dogs that I got from the pound that were super sketchy.
00:04:51.000 That you just knew?
00:04:52.000 I came home once.
00:04:52.000 One of my dogs killed my other dog.
00:04:54.000 Oh shit. 1.00
00:04:55.000 In my living room, man. 1.00
00:04:56.000 My living room was a goddamn crime scene. 0.99
00:04:57.000 I'm like, oh, Jesus Christ. 0.99
00:04:58.000 It was a little outline of the dog.
00:05:00.000 Yeah, I've had some bad experience.
00:05:03.000 That was a rescue dog as well.
00:05:04.000 Yeah.
00:05:04.000 I've had some bad experiences with dogs.
00:05:06.000 When I was a kid, we adopted a dog that had distemper, a Doberman.
00:05:11.000 And he started like, his eyes were like glazed over and he was just snarling at us, barking at us.
00:05:16.000 I'm like, oh, Jesus Christ.
00:05:18.000 Yeah.
00:05:18.000 I couldn't.
00:05:20.000 I grew up in an apartment, so we couldn't have dogs.
00:05:25.000 So I had a cat named Taco.
00:05:28.000 My dad gave him to me.
00:05:31.000 I went to go visit him in the Bahamas.
00:05:33.000 He gave me a cat.
00:05:34.000 I think he knew it would piss my mom off.
00:05:36.000 So I had a cat growing up named Taco.
00:05:38.000 You can bring it back from your...
00:05:40.000 Oh yeah, I had a cake back with a cake from the Conliffe Bakery that they have over there and they...
00:05:49.000 And a cat.
00:05:50.000 A cake and a cat.
00:05:51.000 My mom was pissed. 0.90
00:05:53.000 See if you can find this conversation, Jamie.
00:05:56.000 And it says they're joking, but it also has a question that says that they're joking.
00:06:00.000 No, but that's Mediate.
00:06:02.000 It says they're joking, right?
00:06:02.000 Yeah, every other website is not saying they're joking.
00:06:04.000 It doesn't sound like they're joking.
00:06:06.000 I think they're trying to come up with some sort of a cover for it.
00:06:08.000 But let's play what he said.
00:06:11.000 It's John Roberts, who is a correspondent for Fox, and then who is the other guy?
00:06:15.000 The other guy who works for the New York Times?
00:06:17.000 Doug Mills.
00:06:18.000 He's a photographer.
00:06:19.000 Okay, so now it says apparently joking.
00:06:21.000 It doesn't sound like they're joking.
00:06:23.000 Play what it says.
00:06:24.000 Let me explain it here.
00:06:25.000 John Roberts comes in, and it's going to play an ad before this, Jamie, so kill the volume.
00:06:32.000 John Roberts comes in, and when he comes in, he's not wearing a mask, and he tells the other gentleman, you can take the mask off.
00:06:40.000 And he tells them about this L.A. study.
00:06:43.000 Go ahead, play it here.
00:06:46.000 What's up, buddy?
00:06:46.000 All right, man.
00:06:47.000 Where do you go, buddy?
00:06:48.000 You can take out the mask, Doug.
00:06:49.000 The case fatality rate's like.1 to.3, according to USC. Is it really?
00:06:55.000 That's reassuring.
00:06:57.000 Everybody here has been vaccinated anyway.
00:06:59.000 USC and LA County Public Health have come up with a study.
00:07:03.000 They found that there are 7,000 cases in California, but they really believe that there are anywhere from 221,442,000 people who were infected.
00:07:14.000 Really?
00:07:14.000 Yeah.
00:07:15.000 So, that makes it 0.1, 2, 0.3.
00:07:19.000 There's a study to give it up, are you sorry?
00:07:21.000 Yeah, just give it to that.
00:07:25.000 So, it suggests in case you're taller, it's going to be 10. Wow.
00:07:30.000 What's your right line with the fluid?
00:07:32.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:07:32.000 That's what it is.
00:07:34.000 Oh, it was a hose.
00:07:36.000 I don't think it was a hose.
00:07:40.000 Here's what's weird about that.
00:07:42.000 One, that guy says, well, we've all been vaccinated here anyway.
00:07:46.000 Right.
00:07:47.000 Now, maybe he was joking.
00:07:51.000 Maybe he's got a weird sense of humor.
00:07:53.000 Long joke.
00:07:54.000 It's a weird joke.
00:07:55.000 Yeah, weird, yeah.
00:07:57.000 Now, they have done some trial vaccines.
00:08:01.000 There are some vaccines that are in trial.
00:08:03.000 There was a woman in Seattle. 0.98
00:08:04.000 She was the first person to get tested.
00:08:08.000 And I sent this stuff to Matt Staggs earlier today, and he sent something to me.
00:08:15.000 There have been several different There's 70 coronavirus vaccines right now that are under development with three in human trials.
00:08:25.000 Okay.
00:08:25.000 So there have been some things going on right now.
00:08:29.000 And the first person treated with the coronavirus is in Seattle.
00:08:33.000 There's an article about that where she's talking about getting tested.
00:08:36.000 But this guy's saying we've all been vaccinated.
00:08:39.000 Like, I don't know what that means.
00:08:41.000 It's hard to tell.
00:08:42.000 People have weird senses of humor, right? 0.99
00:08:45.000 Like, if you listen to comics, and if you took some of the shit that we say and wrote it down, you'd be like, these are terrible people. 0.99
00:08:53.000 They're eating babies. 1.00
00:08:54.000 They're raping old ladies. 1.00
00:08:56.000 We say ridiculous shit all the time, and we get used to it. 1.00
00:09:00.000 Maybe they say ridiculous shit, too. 1.00
00:09:03.000 I think so. 1.00
00:09:04.000 Look where they are.
00:09:05.000 Look what they're dealing with right now.
00:09:06.000 Right, but the other guy coming in saying you don't have to wear a mask.
00:09:10.000 So Roberts comes in with no mask on.
00:09:11.000 Yeah.
00:09:12.000 It says you don't need a mask.
00:09:14.000 Mortality rates, yeah.
00:09:15.000 Well, that study's weird, man.
00:09:17.000 Because, okay.
00:09:20.000 Maybe.
00:09:20.000 Maybe.
00:09:21.000 I believe the mortality rate is correct. 0.95
00:09:24.000 I believe that it's way less deadly than they thought it was, but they had to prepare for something that they thought was going to be real deadly, because it's real deadly in Italy.
00:09:32.000 But the question is, like, there's so many questions.
00:09:34.000 Why is it so deadly in Italy?
00:09:36.000 Is it because they're older people?
00:09:38.000 Is it because they smoke?
00:09:39.000 Why is it so deadly in New York City?
00:09:42.000 Is it because they're stacked on top of each other?
00:09:44.000 I don't know.
00:09:46.000 Definitely, definitely, definitely that.
00:09:48.000 Has to have something to do with it.
00:09:48.000 No distancing there.
00:09:50.000 Also, okay, so I have an office, and I get Uber Eats. 0.76
00:09:56.000 And when things started popping, my Uber Eats driver was an older black man. 0.89
00:10:01.000 He's walking mad close to me. 0.70
00:10:02.000 I'm like, what's up? 0.99
00:10:03.000 He goes, black people can't get this. 0.99
00:10:04.000 It'll be all right. 0.99
00:10:05.000 And I'm like, whoa, man, what are you talking?
00:10:07.000 So I get the thing.
00:10:08.000 Right.
00:10:08.000 I'm not going to lie, part of me was like, okay.
00:10:10.000 But why am I taking advice from this Uber driver guy?
00:10:15.000 Then a personal friend of mine, his dad, who I also know, Black Ski Trip, he started this black ski organization.
00:10:29.000 And they went to Idaho, and they came back, and a lot of the—they were older gentlemen, but a lot of them got infected with the virus.
00:10:37.000 Two have since passed away from it.
00:10:38.000 So their son—it's in the LA Times, it's the first article.
00:10:44.000 His son did a day-by-day social media post to try to turn the narrative that, black folks, you can catch this.
00:10:52.000 This is what's happened to my dad.
00:10:53.000 He was like 61, I want to say.
00:10:55.000 And so— So that's why I was very nervous in the face when we took the test.
00:11:01.000 It's like I want to have the confidence that that man had walking in the room, but I'm also very...
00:11:08.000 I'm more of safe than sorry than the...
00:11:13.000 I can't wait to be at that space.
00:11:15.000 You can take your mask off.
00:11:16.000 You know what I mean?
00:11:17.000 I need...
00:11:17.000 You know, because I have two young children.
00:11:19.000 I'm just like...
00:11:20.000 I'm just...
00:11:21.000 I'm more on the caution side, but I'm not...
00:11:26.000 Telling anyone what they should believe or not believe.
00:11:28.000 But just for me, I'm just like...
00:11:30.000 I'm hearing about what it does to your lungs and how it expands.
00:11:35.000 It makes it hard for air to get through when you need a ventilator and all of it.
00:11:38.000 What if your lungs collapse, which is what happened to one of these gentlemen.
00:11:41.000 And it's just...
00:11:42.000 It's a wrap.
00:11:43.000 But it is like...
00:11:45.000 I don't know.
00:11:47.000 I don't know the specifics of how anything else plays out.
00:11:51.000 But I am also hearing stories from the other side of people who...
00:11:54.000 Who are like fairly, you know, within my six degrees who are succumbing to it.
00:12:00.000 So I'm just like...
00:12:02.000 That's great, but I'm not there yet.
00:12:07.000 You know what I mean?
00:12:08.000 Emotionally.
00:12:10.000 First of all, anybody can catch it. 1.00
00:12:11.000 But second of all, I think that if your immune system has any holes in it, that shit gets in. 1.00
00:12:16.000 And it can fuck you up. 1.00
00:12:18.000 Look at Michael Yeo. 0.97
00:12:19.000 Michael Yeo is a healthy guy.
00:12:21.000 He's strong.
00:12:22.000 He lifts weights all the time.
00:12:24.000 He's relatively young.
00:12:25.000 I think he's 45. You know, Michael Hill's in good shape.
00:12:28.000 He's not overweight.
00:12:29.000 Did he catch it?
00:12:30.000 Yes.
00:12:30.000 Are you serious?
00:12:31.000 Real bad.
00:12:31.000 Oh, I didn't know that.
00:12:32.000 Hospitalized for a week.
00:12:33.000 Said he thought he was going to die. 0.99
00:12:35.000 He scared the fuck out of me. 0.99
00:12:36.000 Right.
00:12:37.000 When I heard it was him, he was texting me.
00:12:39.000 He said, I would call you right now, but I can't talk. 0.99
00:12:42.000 Damn. 0.99
00:12:42.000 I was like, wow. 0.99
00:12:43.000 Yeah, man, because of what it physically does.
00:12:47.000 When I was going to the grocery store like that, that's when I was the most horrified because that's when you kind of get a temperature of how everyone is.
00:12:53.000 And so when I went early on, people were like, are you six feet away?
00:12:56.000 Like people were joking.
00:12:57.000 And then there was something happened and people started kind of taking it as serious as people could.
00:13:05.000 And...
00:13:07.000 Yeah, I mean, I'm just...
00:13:09.000 I have a very cautious mind.
00:13:10.000 I'm just a safe...
00:13:12.000 I'm the most reckless on stage, but anything off stage, I'm like, what's going on?
00:13:18.000 Is that the police? 0.99
00:13:19.000 What the fuck's going on? 1.00
00:13:20.000 That's hilarious! 1.00
00:13:21.000 Because you are kind of reckless on stage.
00:13:23.000 That's so funny.
00:13:24.000 That's funny.
00:13:25.000 That's true about you.
00:13:26.000 Yeah.
00:13:26.000 I never thought about it that way.
00:13:28.000 Like, you're like a real safe guy off stage.
00:13:30.000 Yeah, man.
00:13:30.000 Yeah, man.
00:13:31.000 And it's just...
00:13:31.000 I've seen...
00:13:34.000 It could almost be like a funny movie, right? 1.00
00:13:36.000 Every time one of my friends go, fuck it, man, I'm just gonna live in the moment. 1.00
00:13:40.000 Pow! 1.00
00:13:41.000 What happened to Tommy?
00:13:42.000 Tommy gone!
00:13:45.000 Gotta be careful out here.
00:13:47.000 I mean, it's just like, I have so many just stories or memories from my childhood of people. 1.00
00:13:52.000 Man, fuck it, you gotta live for now. 1.00
00:13:54.000 Gone. 1.00
00:13:54.000 You know what I mean? 1.00
00:13:55.000 So it's just like...
00:13:56.000 And I... You know, so I'm back and forth on that moment.
00:14:02.000 So when I saw him walk in, that guy looked like he was in shape.
00:14:05.000 He worked out.
00:14:06.000 And there are a lot of people in Trader Joe's lines like him.
00:14:10.000 You know what I mean?
00:14:11.000 Like, when you're standing in line, it's like, you don't need to matter.
00:14:13.000 Like, those people.
00:14:14.000 And it's just like, it's not for me, man.
00:14:16.000 I don't know what, I don't want to bring anything home to my young kids.
00:14:19.000 Of course. 0.82
00:14:20.000 So if it was just me in the crib, I would be trying to get last days, puss. 0.96
00:14:25.000 Yeah. 0.81
00:14:25.000 Yeah. 0.81
00:14:26.000 But I'm married, happily married, so my brain, I'm not, I am super cautious, like, back away! 1.00
00:14:32.000 Single people are fucked right now, right? 1.00
00:14:34.000 If you live by yourself in an apartment, you're not allowed to leave, you can't go to work anymore, so you're just sitting in an apartment going crazy. 1.00
00:14:40.000 Just going crazy. 1.00
00:14:41.000 You can't fuck anybody. 1.00
00:14:42.000 Watching all the news outlets. 1.00
00:14:43.000 Nope. 1.00
00:14:43.000 If you fuck someone, it better be just one person. 1.00
00:14:46.000 You gotta be real careful. 1.00
00:14:47.000 We all go together.
00:14:49.000 It's a wrap.
00:14:50.000 That's your person.
00:14:51.000 It bothers me, the restrictions on personal liberties.
00:14:55.000 I think I'm very...
00:14:58.000 Here's what I'm happy about.
00:15:01.000 I'm happy that so many people have...
00:15:05.000 Done the social distancing thing and quarantined and kept away.
00:15:08.000 Almost everybody I know.
00:15:10.000 Almost everybody I know is just staying home.
00:15:12.000 My kids are home doing homeschool.
00:15:14.000 All my friends' kids are home doing homeschool.
00:15:16.000 They're staying home from work.
00:15:17.000 Everyone's staying home.
00:15:18.000 And we don't go anywhere.
00:15:20.000 You know, I come here, I go home.
00:15:21.000 That's it.
00:15:22.000 That's my life.
00:15:23.000 Just stay put.
00:15:24.000 Stay put. 1.00
00:15:24.000 Just let the fucking dust settle. 1.00
00:15:27.000 It's great in that way. 1.00
00:15:28.000 But it's also scary for all these fucking people that have businesses. 0.99
00:15:31.000 It's scarier for people that have compromised immune systems. 0.99
00:15:35.000 Oh gosh, yeah.
00:15:36.000 This is the weirdest time of our lives.
00:15:38.000 Yeah.
00:15:39.000 I think, but we were talking earlier, I think that the planet needs this break.
00:15:42.000 Yeah.
00:15:43.000 Because as soon as we stayed in for like a week, it started raining in L.A. The skies are clear.
00:15:49.000 The skies are clear.
00:15:50.000 Do you see L.A. has the best air quality in all of the world?
00:15:54.000 And her.
00:15:56.000 Just stay in the house for...
00:15:58.000 For three weeks, it all fixes itself.
00:16:02.000 It's kind of crazy.
00:16:03.000 It is weird, man.
00:16:05.000 I'm curious to see what happens on the other side of this. 1.00
00:16:07.000 Our industry, because you had a tour that was supposed to pop off, that kind of stuff is just like, fuck. 0.99
00:16:13.000 I had a sold-out show in Vancouver last night in an arena. 0.99
00:16:16.000 Couldn't do it.
00:16:17.000 We moved into October.
00:16:19.000 Look, that's the last of the worries.
00:16:21.000 My health is fine.
00:16:22.000 I'm worried about health more than anything.
00:16:24.000 And I'm worried about the economy.
00:16:26.000 I'm worried about people like my friend Adam Perry-Lang, who owns APL restaurants, like my favorite steakhouse in LA. He's spending most of his time cooking for hospital workers and bringing food to them.
00:16:40.000 So that's giving him a sense of purpose through all this.
00:16:42.000 And they're doing like curbside pickup where people can order food online.
00:16:45.000 It's an amazing steakhouse, but they might not make it.
00:16:49.000 And I was texting with him last night.
00:16:51.000 I'm going to get him on the podcast soon.
00:16:53.000 And he was saying that for his friends in the restaurant industry, it's so grave.
00:16:57.000 It's like everyone is barely hanging on and they might drop off left and right.
00:17:02.000 I mean, we might lose half our restaurants.
00:17:04.000 Oh, yeah.
00:17:05.000 Did you hear about what happened when they did the small business loan?
00:17:09.000 Bruce Chris Steakhouse got it, and none of the waiters got it.
00:17:12.000 None of them.
00:17:12.000 It just goes straight to the business.
00:17:16.000 I think the idea is, look, if you give it to the waiters and the business goes under, the waiters won't have a job when the business comes back.
00:17:22.000 So if they keep the business open, the waiters will have a job when everything comes back.
00:17:26.000 We just need more.
00:17:27.000 We need to figure out, you know, these people have to be able to work, and if they can't work, we've got to figure out a way to sustain them.
00:17:34.000 I don't know.
00:17:35.000 Nobody's ever figured this out before.
00:17:36.000 Nobody's ever had to do this before. 0.99
00:17:37.000 They burn through that small business loan shit and like that. 0.98
00:17:40.000 Yeah, they were saying because it was supposed to be for companies, 500 employees or less, but, you know. 0.99
00:17:46.000 Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos, time to step up.
00:17:49.000 What y'all doing?
00:17:50.000 How much money would Jeff Bezos have left if he gave everybody $1,000?
00:17:57.000 Listen, he would be...
00:18:00.000 Everybody?
00:18:01.000 Everybody in this country.
00:18:02.000 In this country?
00:18:03.000 $1,000?
00:18:04.000 $320 million.
00:18:05.000 He gave everybody $1,000.
00:18:06.000 Do the math, Jamie.
00:18:07.000 What is that?
00:18:07.000 How much is that?
00:18:08.000 I'm a moron. 1.00
00:18:08.000 Is that billions or true? 1.00
00:18:10.000 Well, it's $1,000 million is a billion, so it would be $300 billion.
00:18:16.000 So he'd be broke.
00:18:16.000 He'd be broke.
00:18:17.000 He'd be broke instantly.
00:18:19.000 Crazy.
00:18:20.000 Imagine if he did that and just became a hippie, so he'd give up. 1.00
00:18:22.000 He'd been an asshole. 1.00
00:18:23.000 It's like, people don't remember Bill Gates, the old Bill Gates. 1.00
00:18:27.000 Right.
00:18:27.000 People see Bill Gates now.
00:18:28.000 I see Bill Gates now, and I see a guy who's wearing an outfit.
00:18:32.000 He wears an outfit.
00:18:33.000 Yeah.
00:18:33.000 It's like he's got a suit.
00:18:35.000 It's like Spider-Man.
00:18:36.000 Like, he puts on a Spider-Man.
00:18:37.000 Like, this is my really nice rich guy thing.
00:18:40.000 I've got a sweater. 0.99
00:18:41.000 Bitch, it's 100 degrees outside. 0.99
00:18:42.000 Why you got that sweater with a shirt underneath it? 1.00
00:18:44.000 It's...
00:18:44.000 Secretly ventilated.
00:18:46.000 Does he ever have a t-shirt on?
00:18:48.000 Does Bill Gates ever rock a t-shirt?
00:18:50.000 I heard he had a house where...
00:18:53.000 When you walk into a room, it recognizes how you like the temperature.
00:18:58.000 Like you were a band.
00:18:59.000 Yes, you had a clip.
00:19:00.000 You had a pin.
00:19:02.000 And it would change the temperature.
00:19:03.000 It would make coffee that you like.
00:19:05.000 And I was like, I was single when I heard about this.
00:19:08.000 I was like, I wish I had that.
00:19:09.000 Because that's how the girl would know it was over.
00:19:12.000 It's cold.
00:19:15.000 Change the settings.
00:19:17.000 Yeah, you walk in, it changes the artwork.
00:19:19.000 It flips over.
00:19:20.000 Right, right.
00:19:21.000 But, I mean...
00:19:23.000 Yeah, he called this though.
00:19:25.000 We weren't ready for a pandemic like years ago.
00:19:28.000 2015, yeah.
00:19:30.000 Well, he set it up.
00:19:31.000 He's the mastermind behind it.
00:19:33.000 He's like one of the Incredibles, like the bad guy in Incredibles.
00:19:37.000 I'm just confused by his outfit because it's like he's dressing up like Mr. Rogers on purpose.
00:19:42.000 He wants you to think of him in a different way.
00:19:45.000 He's a savage, man. 1.00
00:19:46.000 He was the most ruthless motherfucker when he was running Microsoft. 1.00
00:19:51.000 That's why Microsoft got so huge. 1.00
00:19:53.000 They were take-no-prisoners businessmen.
00:19:55.000 Take-no-prisoners! 0.59
00:19:57.000 But he's pretending like he's, you know... 1.00
00:20:00.000 I kind of love that shit, though. 1.00
00:20:02.000 Like... 1.00
00:20:03.000 When people...
00:20:04.000 Because you just have to know how to look for it, right?
00:20:07.000 Like, I don't trust anybody that doesn't cuss on stage. 1.00
00:20:10.000 You know, those motherfuckers? 1.00
00:20:12.000 It's like, something's going on. 1.00
00:20:13.000 Right, those are the ones who do freaky shit. 1.00
00:20:15.000 Oh, yeah! 1.00
00:20:15.000 Ball gags and stuff. 1.00
00:20:16.000 Yes!
00:20:16.000 Oh, look at that.
00:20:17.000 He's got a t-shirt there.
00:20:18.000 Come on, man.
00:20:19.000 That's a button-up t-shirt with a collar.
00:20:20.000 Everything has a collar, though.
00:20:21.000 But that's a long time ago.
00:20:23.000 That looks like about 15 years old.
00:20:25.000 It's a nice crew, though.
00:20:26.000 Look at that crew.
00:20:29.000 Luda's like the Forrest Gump of photos like this. 0.77
00:20:31.000 He hosted Fear Factor.
00:20:33.000 Luda took over Fear Factor after me.
00:20:36.000 Where's that connection?
00:20:37.000 They offered him a lot of money, and he was like, I'll take it.
00:20:41.000 Amazing.
00:20:42.000 Amazing, man.
00:20:45.000 I don't know.
00:20:45.000 I'm a big fan.
00:20:46.000 Yeah, I like Luda a lot, man.
00:20:48.000 I had a bit about him in my act.
00:20:49.000 Yeah, I was in a restaurant he owned, and he was walking through, shaking hands.
00:20:53.000 I was like, Luda!
00:20:54.000 My friend, Jeremy Rawl, shout out to Jeremy, directed his first video.
00:20:59.000 Oh, wow.
00:20:59.000 Jeremy and I went to college together, and he directed his first two, and it put Luda on the map.
00:21:03.000 So I've always been a fan of Luda, and what I like about his career is that he's like...
00:21:08.000 He's not somebody you would think of, but when he's in there, you don't mind that he's there.
00:21:12.000 You know what I mean?
00:21:13.000 Like, when I was watching the Fast and the Furious movies, I was like, all right!
00:21:16.000 You know what I mean?
00:21:18.000 I wasn't like, Luda! 0.99
00:21:19.000 Dude, I'm the biggest fan in the world of muscle cars, of those 1960s muscle cars, and I never watched one of those fucking movies. 0.99
00:21:27.000 Oh, you gotta... 0.99
00:21:27.000 Just watch it on mute. 0.99
00:21:28.000 Watch it on mute, man.
00:21:29.000 Because you'll get the best of both worlds. 0.99
00:21:32.000 Get the fuck out of here with all that. 0.98
00:21:35.000 They're jumping over bridges. 0.99
00:21:36.000 Yeah, it's crazy.
00:21:38.000 1969 Chargers. 0.97
00:21:39.000 It's ridiculous. 0.99
00:21:39.000 It's ridiculous, man. 0.99
00:21:41.000 But yeah, man.
00:21:42.000 I gotta thank you, man.
00:21:44.000 Since I was here last, you lit a flame under me.
00:21:48.000 You challenged me to put notebooks out.
00:21:51.000 Yes!
00:21:51.000 It's out!
00:21:52.000 It's out!
00:21:53.000 Yeah, we were talking about last time, folks, that comedians, a lot of us, keep our old, old notebooks.
00:21:59.000 That's right.
00:22:00.000 It was like three years ago, right?
00:22:01.000 Close to it?
00:22:02.000 Yeah.
00:22:02.000 So three years ago, Owen, you got a hold of me and you said, do you have any old notebooks?
00:22:08.000 I'm doing this show.
00:22:09.000 And I'm like, oh shit, I saved a bunch of them. 0.90
00:22:11.000 And I found some from like 1992. Yes. 0.92
00:22:15.000 And they were so terrible. 0.99
00:22:19.000 So Owen and I sat in the comedy store and it's fucking ruthlessly embarrassing. 0.99
00:22:24.000 Yes. 0.98
00:22:25.000 It's so bad how these premises are so awful.
00:22:29.000 And so you put it on YouTube now, which is the way to go.
00:22:33.000 I'm so glad you did that.
00:22:35.000 And so this is available.
00:22:36.000 Is it OwensmithTV?
00:22:37.000 Is that your YouTube page?
00:22:40.000 OwensmithComedy.
00:22:40.000 Is it OwensmithTV or OwensmithComedy?
00:22:42.000 Yes, OwensmithTV, but we created this page.
00:22:45.000 But if you go to OwensmithComedy, that won't come up.
00:22:48.000 You have to do...
00:22:50.000 YouTube.
00:22:50.000 I need your help in fixing that.
00:22:52.000 That's confusing.
00:22:53.000 If you go to YouTube.com backslash OwensmithTV, you'll get this.
00:22:57.000 Or if you just search Owen Notebooks.
00:22:59.000 Just go to OwensmithTV.
00:23:00.000 YouTube.com OwensmithTV.
00:23:05.000 Yeah, and subscribe.
00:23:06.000 There you go.
00:23:06.000 Okay.
00:23:07.000 Yeah, subscribe.
00:23:07.000 Subscribe, hit the notifications.
00:23:09.000 Yes, and that'll help me be able to do more of these.
00:23:12.000 Yes.
00:23:13.000 How many have you done so far?
00:23:14.000 I shot six.
00:23:15.000 We put out four.
00:23:16.000 And I'm going to release two more coming up.
00:23:20.000 So if you subscribe, you'll know when they're coming out sooner.
00:23:23.000 I might do something for you guys.
00:23:25.000 So you got Neil Brennan, Alonzo Bowden, Eric Griffin.
00:23:28.000 Yep, and you.
00:23:29.000 Oh, beautiful.
00:23:30.000 Yeah, man.
00:23:30.000 All my friends.
00:23:31.000 Yeah, man.
00:23:32.000 It was great because everybody has a different approach to the craft.
00:23:34.000 And I didn't know that Eric and Alonzo took comedy classes.
00:23:38.000 Did they really?
00:23:39.000 Yes!
00:23:40.000 And I was like, oh, what?
00:23:43.000 Because, you know, man, I'm a snob, man.
00:23:46.000 I'm in comedy class.
00:23:47.000 I know, me too.
00:23:48.000 What?
00:23:48.000 And this guy named Lenny Ostrovich taught Alonzo.
00:23:52.000 And Lenny...
00:23:53.000 And I heard the name.
00:23:54.000 I was like, I know that name.
00:23:55.000 Now, I don't know if you...
00:23:57.000 If someone, like, kind of does me...
00:24:00.000 Kind of foul or whatever.
00:24:01.000 I forget about it.
00:24:02.000 Like it helps me to just live.
00:24:04.000 I don't carry it.
00:24:05.000 Good for you.
00:24:06.000 I wish I... So I was like, I know that name.
00:24:08.000 And then as I'm editing it, I look at him and I go, I know that mother...
00:24:11.000 He's a good dude.
00:24:14.000 But when I met him, he was running a comedy club called The Fallout.
00:24:18.000 It was called The Funny Firm and then it became The Fallout.
00:24:20.000 And then it literally fell out like later.
00:24:22.000 But I moved to Chicago in 95. And what I loved about The Room is you could perform downstairs...
00:24:29.000 And then you would run upstairs and perform.
00:24:32.000 And then you'd come back downstairs and do another one.
00:24:34.000 So on a Saturday night, you could do six shows because they would do three shows.
00:24:38.000 Oh, wow.
00:24:39.000 Right when they started papering the room and all of that.
00:24:41.000 So I went to audition.
00:24:43.000 You know how you go, just let me do a guest set.
00:24:44.000 He hired me.
00:24:46.000 He goes...
00:24:47.000 Do the rest of the night.
00:24:48.000 I was like, bet.
00:24:49.000 At the end of the night, he pays everybody but me.
00:24:52.000 And he goes, I got spots for you.
00:24:54.000 And I was like, I'm supposed to get some money. 0.99
00:24:55.000 And like two other comics, Dwayne Kennedy and Ty Phipps, they go, that's bullshit. 0.90
00:24:59.000 And they gave me some of their money. 0.67
00:25:01.000 And I never forgot them for that.
00:25:02.000 I went home that night.
00:25:04.000 I turned on the TV. Dwayne Kennedy, the guy that handed me the money, he's in an episode of Amen playing Halle Berry's boyfriend.
00:25:10.000 I was like, who the fuck is this guy that gave me the money? 0.96
00:25:12.000 But that's like my friend to this day. 0.99
00:25:13.000 Did he get to kiss Halle Berry?
00:25:14.000 I don't remember.
00:25:15.000 Whew.
00:25:16.000 I don't remember.
00:25:17.000 Yeah, man.
00:25:17.000 He was early on.
00:25:19.000 Hit together.
00:25:19.000 Yeah, man.
00:25:20.000 Yeah, man.
00:25:20.000 How many times do you brush your teeth if you got to kiss Halle Berry?
00:25:23.000 Like 80?
00:25:24.000 80,000.
00:25:26.000 You get mints and breast strips.
00:25:27.000 You got Listerine.
00:25:30.000 Hilarious.
00:25:31.000 Yeah, yeah, man.
00:25:32.000 You checking your pits.
00:25:32.000 Young Halle Berry.
00:25:33.000 Having friends check your pits.
00:25:35.000 Come smell me, man.
00:25:35.000 Am I good?
00:25:36.000 Am I good?
00:25:37.000 Halle, you want to rehearse?
00:25:38.000 I know.
00:25:39.000 You're going to her room.
00:25:41.000 She's so pretty.
00:25:42.000 I met her recently at the UFC, and she's got to be like 53 or something like that.
00:25:47.000 She looks like she's 35 years old.
00:25:49.000 She looks perfect.
00:25:50.000 She looks like a perfectly in shape 35-year-old woman. 0.99
00:25:54.000 I mean, how old is Halle Berry?
00:25:57.000 She's got to be over 50, right?
00:25:58.000 She's over 50. Dude, she looks amazing. 1.00
00:26:00.000 She was in John Wick 3. Yeah, she was amazing in that.
00:26:02.000 Amazing.
00:26:03.000 With the dogs and...
00:26:04.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:26:05.000 She's 53. Dude, just the way she moves, man.
00:26:09.000 The way she moves.
00:26:10.000 She's so fit.
00:26:11.000 So fit.
00:26:12.000 It's incredible.
00:26:13.000 And she does a lot of workouts online. 0.99
00:26:14.000 She's doing a lot of workouts online while all this shit's going down. 1.00
00:26:17.000 Yeah, yeah. 0.98
00:26:18.000 Some guy with fabulous long hair.
00:26:20.000 Yeah.
00:26:22.000 Some guru character.
00:26:23.000 So then we're going to do curls.
00:26:25.000 It's like, really?
00:26:26.000 It's her partner.
00:26:27.000 That's the weirdest thing when a guy and a girl are together and they say, this is my partner. 0.99
00:26:31.000 It's my partner.
00:26:31.000 Are you guys in business together?
00:26:33.000 Are you just fucking? 1.00
00:26:34.000 What is a partner? 1.00
00:26:37.000 This is my partner.
00:26:38.000 A man said that to me once.
00:26:41.000 Yeah, I was doing this thing with my partner. 0.82
00:26:44.000 I'm like, First of all, I think, are you gay? 0.92
00:26:47.000 Right.
00:26:47.000 First of all, even if you're gay in 2020, why aren't you saying my boyfriend or my husband?
00:26:53.000 Right.
00:26:53.000 You know?
00:26:54.000 Partner.
00:26:55.000 I know it's like...
00:26:55.000 But it's a woman?
00:26:56.000 You're talking about a woman.
00:26:57.000 But you're not in business together.
00:27:00.000 You're a partner.
00:27:01.000 Yeah.
00:27:01.000 I went on vacation with my partner.
00:27:02.000 Like, mmm...
00:27:04.000 Yeah.
00:27:04.000 What is that?
00:27:05.000 Partner?
00:27:06.000 Yeah.
00:27:06.000 You guys have a firm?
00:27:08.000 As a married man. 1.00
00:27:09.000 This is the We Fuck firm? 1.00
00:27:10.000 Hilarious. 1.00
00:27:11.000 Yeah, as a married man, I'm like, man, have some courage, man.
00:27:14.000 Get in there.
00:27:14.000 Get in the game.
00:27:15.000 Stop.
00:27:16.000 Don't get in the game with everybody.
00:27:17.000 No, no.
00:27:17.000 Some people you gotta live with for a little...
00:27:20.000 Yeah, figure it out.
00:27:21.000 When people say, I don't want to live with somebody, I just want to get married, I'm like, that's a mistake.
00:27:24.000 That is where it happens.
00:27:26.000 Yes. 1.00
00:27:27.000 That happily ever after shit is for the movies. 1.00
00:27:30.000 Where it's real is when you live together. 1.00
00:27:32.000 Mm-hmm. 1.00
00:27:33.000 And it's little shit. 1.00
00:27:35.000 It's little shit, man. 1.00
00:27:36.000 How you squeeze the toothpaste. 1.00
00:27:37.000 Right. 1.00
00:27:38.000 That shit over time. 1.00
00:27:39.000 Whether or not you clean up. 1.00
00:27:40.000 Whether or not you clean up.
00:27:41.000 Whether they ask you to do more things than you ask them to do.
00:27:44.000 Yes.
00:27:45.000 Yeah.
00:27:45.000 Somebody keeping score or whatever.
00:27:47.000 Yeah.
00:27:48.000 Cooks who does dishes.
00:27:50.000 Can you load a dishwasher? 1.00
00:27:52.000 Do they complain about stupid shit? 1.00
00:27:54.000 Man, I feel like we could talk about this all day. 1.00
00:27:56.000 All day.
00:27:57.000 And then how do you deal with it?
00:27:59.000 Because you ain't going nowhere.
00:28:00.000 You know what the big one is?
00:28:02.000 One bathroom.
00:28:04.000 If you only have enough money for one bathroom, you shouldn't be in a relationship.
00:28:08.000 Or you gotta really know each other.
00:28:11.000 Like you spent so many nights together, like so many weekends together.
00:28:15.000 You stay at her place or she stays at your place. 0.89
00:28:18.000 Want that one bathroom? 1.00
00:28:20.000 There's a reality when you walk in the bathroom right after a girl takes a fucking rank shot. 1.00
00:28:24.000 And if it's cold out, then you gotta open up the window and you're like, oh good lord! 1.00
00:28:34.000 So you're sitting there smelling her shit, freezing. 1.00
00:28:37.000 Yes. 1.00
00:28:38.000 Trying to take your own shit on top of her shit. 1.00
00:28:40.000 Yeah, no. 1.00
00:28:41.000 We'll do it.
00:28:42.000 Y'all not going to make it.
00:28:43.000 You need two bathrooms. 1.00
00:28:45.000 Yeah?
00:28:45.000 Yeah.
00:28:46.000 It depends.
00:28:47.000 For me, I was like...
00:28:48.000 It depends on the chemistry of the person.
00:28:49.000 Yeah.
00:28:50.000 There's some people that a little thing will set you off and you're like, I can't. 0.98
00:28:54.000 But then there's other people that you like them so much, that little thing ain't shit. 0.98
00:28:59.000 No. 0.98
00:28:59.000 The same thing. 0.98
00:29:01.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:29:01.000 There's some dates I'm sure you went on when you were single where a girl just did one little stupid thing and you're like, this is over. 0.99
00:29:06.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:29:06.000 Yes! 0.99
00:29:07.000 Yes!
00:29:07.000 Yes!
00:29:08.000 But like, if you really were into her, that same thing, like, ah, whatever.
00:29:12.000 She's having a rough day. 0.99
00:29:14.000 Nah, I was fucked up. 1.00
00:29:17.000 I'll be like, she fine as hell, but I can't, man. 0.99
00:29:20.000 I'll be nice to her, though.
00:29:22.000 Thank you.
00:29:23.000 And then be out.
00:29:24.000 Yeah, man.
00:29:25.000 There's certain things you just...
00:29:26.000 You know, for me, it was people that insult you. 1.00
00:29:29.000 People that insult you, and then they try to put you down, try to fuck with you a little bit. 1.00
00:29:34.000 Man up, man up. 0.99
00:29:35.000 But just like, they're doing it to try to diminish you in some sort of a weird way, and they're not even funny.
00:29:42.000 Right.
00:29:43.000 Like, oh, is that who you're into?
00:29:45.000 Oh yeah, no.
00:29:46.000 But sometimes people grew up like that.
00:29:47.000 Yeah.
00:29:48.000 Like their mom and their dad did that to each other, and so they don't know how to behave in a relationship.
00:29:53.000 And that's their definition of love.
00:29:55.000 What's love like to you?
00:29:57.000 Yeah.
00:29:58.000 And if it doesn't match what it looks like to you, y'all ain't gonna make it.
00:30:01.000 Exactly.
00:30:02.000 Yeah, man, I was all over the place with that.
00:30:06.000 I remember I dated this one girl, she smoked a lot of weed, right? 1.00
00:30:10.000 I didn't mind that, but she also smoked cigarettes. 0.99
00:30:12.000 So I was like, damn, pick one. 0.99
00:30:13.000 And I wish it was just a weed. 0.99
00:30:15.000 So then she was like, I'm going to quit when I'm 30. I'm like, well, you're 27 now.
00:30:19.000 I got a way out.
00:30:21.000 So I couldn't, like, and then.
00:30:23.000 That's a weird number.
00:30:24.000 But I was still okay because she was fun.
00:30:26.000 This is, like, the closest.
00:30:27.000 She was mad fun. 1.00
00:30:28.000 And then she had, like, student loan financial shit on top of it. 0.99
00:30:31.000 I was like, I'm out. 0.99
00:30:32.000 Yeah.
00:30:35.000 But real talk, she got it together when she got on the other side of 30. Did she?
00:30:38.000 Yeah, we're friendly now, but I still...
00:30:40.000 It was a gamble.
00:30:41.000 Like, I gotta...
00:30:42.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:30:44.000 Financial shit. 1.00
00:30:45.000 That could be her. 1.00
00:30:46.000 That becomes yours.
00:30:47.000 Her debt is your debt.
00:30:47.000 They don't tell you that.
00:30:48.000 Her debt becomes your debt.
00:30:50.000 She was like...
00:30:51.000 She was a... 0.99
00:30:54.000 A serial degree person. 1.00
00:30:56.000 She had degrees, so her shit was high. 0.99
00:30:59.000 It wasn't like hundreds of thousands. 1.00
00:31:03.000 Dude, that is the biggest goddamn scam going. 0.98
00:31:05.000 Because no matter what happens in your life, you have to pay back those student loans. 0.99
00:31:09.000 If you owe money to any, you can go bankrupt.
00:31:12.000 You can go bankrupt.
00:31:13.000 And you don't have to pay back.
00:31:15.000 Your business folds, you can go bankrupt.
00:31:17.000 But Sallie Mae's like, hey, uh... 1.00
00:31:19.000 They don't give a fuck. 0.99
00:31:20.000 You owe student loans, you're paying those. 1.00
00:31:22.000 After 13, you gotta pay that shit. 0.99
00:31:23.000 Do you know there's people today that have Social Security docked for their student loans? 1.00
00:31:28.000 Imagine you're at the end of the game, and your Social Security, they're taking your Social Security to pay off some bullshit debt for a loan that didn't do you any good. 0.99
00:31:39.000 Because here you are, collecting Social Security, broke as fuck. 0.99
00:31:42.000 Right. 1.00
00:31:43.000 And they take some of it.
00:31:45.000 Depending on it.
00:31:45.000 They probably take a good-sized chunk, too.
00:31:47.000 Oh, yeah.
00:31:47.000 Oh, yeah.
00:31:48.000 And you're never going to pay it off. 0.89
00:31:48.000 You're just going to die. 0.89
00:31:49.000 And that's going to help you die quicker. 0.97
00:31:51.000 Because you're going to be thinking about it. 0.77
00:31:52.000 That's how they get rid of you.
00:31:53.000 All day, just at the park, trying to feed the pigeons. 1.00
00:31:57.000 Damn extra degree. 1.00
00:31:58.000 Fuck! 1.00
00:31:59.000 Yeah, man, I paid my shit off. 1.00
00:32:01.000 I was so happy. 0.94
00:32:02.000 And I don't really use it.
00:32:04.000 I kind of use it.
00:32:06.000 What was your degree?
00:32:07.000 I was finance, or you say finance, if you have money.
00:32:11.000 It was a finance degree.
00:32:13.000 And I studied Japanese for like a year.
00:32:15.000 Really?
00:32:16.000 Yeah, man.
00:32:16.000 I was going to go over there.
00:32:17.000 And a director named Christine Swanson, she just directed the Clark Sisters movie that came out on Lifetime, did over like 11 million views.
00:32:27.000 Her and her husband, Mike Swanson, they were dating at Notre Dame at the time.
00:32:32.000 They were like, you should take Japanese. 1.00
00:32:33.000 They would sit down and look at me and check in with me and just go, you should do this.
00:32:37.000 And I would do it.
00:32:39.000 So they were like, you should take Japanese. 0.99
00:32:40.000 And I started taking Japanese.
00:32:42.000 And I liked it.
00:32:42.000 I really enjoyed it.
00:32:43.000 And I learned...
00:32:44.000 I was getting these culture classes because I was going to go over there for a year.
00:32:48.000 Wow. 1.00
00:32:49.000 And, um, and I was, and I, and I, I'm an asshole. 0.98
00:32:51.000 So I would like mimic the teacher, but I was literally, but she enjoyed it because I was actually saying it natively. 0.99
00:32:57.000 So I wasn't being like a, a dick. 0.87
00:32:59.000 Cause I enjoy, like, I just noticed how she was saying it. 0.98
00:33:02.000 No one else was saying it.
00:33:03.000 So I go, I'm going to just say it like her.
00:33:04.000 So she'd be like, um, How well are you good at this?
00:33:21.000 I got into it because it's also like it's...
00:33:24.000 I was just fascinated by why Japanese literacy rate was so much higher than ours.
00:33:29.000 It's because they have three alphabets.
00:33:33.000 And so there's hiragana, katakana, and kanji.
00:33:37.000 And kanji is what everybody gets tattoos of. 0.98
00:33:39.000 So I was just fascinated with the art of it and shit. 0.94
00:33:43.000 What's the difference between three alphabets? 0.97
00:33:45.000 So katakana is more syllabatic.
00:33:48.000 It's like how you speak.
00:33:50.000 So I could write your name in katakana.
00:33:57.000 I'm rusty, so I could have messed up just now, and I'm also drinking a little scotch.
00:34:02.000 What am I drinking?
00:34:03.000 Whiskey.
00:34:08.000 And so one is per syllable.
00:34:11.000 So you can take like American words and write that in Japanese.
00:34:14.000 And a Japanese person can go, oh, that's how they pronounce names, right?
00:34:18.000 So if your name is, I don't know, D'Artagnan, you could do that in Japanese. 0.99
00:34:24.000 Who the fuck is named D'Artagnan? 0.99
00:34:26.000 It's a school with a cat named D'Artagnan. 1.00
00:34:28.000 They would be like, D'Artagnan.
00:34:30.000 Was he a knight?
00:34:31.000 No.
00:34:34.000 But kanji, one kanji could mean several different things.
00:34:38.000 So you have to know in the context in which you're using it.
00:34:43.000 And I'm left-handed, so I naturally would look at stuff from right to left, and that's how they read.
00:34:49.000 They don't go this way.
00:34:50.000 So their books go the opposite way.
00:34:52.000 So I was kind of like...
00:34:54.000 And my son...
00:34:56.000 Can't say, like, the letter L right now.
00:34:58.000 Everything is W. So I'm like, he's, like, naturally, like, he should be learning Chinese or Japanese now, I think, just because the way his tongue and stuff is forming. 1.00
00:35:08.000 He'll be like, yeah, well, you know, or...
00:35:11.000 And I'm like, we would make fun, you know.
00:35:13.000 All kids do that.
00:35:13.000 All kids, but I'm like, maybe.
00:35:15.000 So, but when I was learning it, I just got really into it because it took, like, a lot of, like, detail to, like, figure it out and it started sticking with me.
00:35:23.000 And then I started doing comedy in college and I started, on the weekends, I would drive to, like, Des Moines, Iowa and do a Funny Bone.
00:35:33.000 And come back, and they were like, you still want to go to Japan?
00:35:35.000 I was like, nah, I know what I'm going to do.
00:35:36.000 I found what I was going to do, so I just didn't.
00:35:40.000 I never went.
00:35:42.000 That's a trip I've always wanted to take and see how much of it comes back to me, because I was pretty good at it.
00:35:50.000 And then I started learning Chinese, and Chinese is...
00:35:55.000 It's monosyllabolic.
00:35:56.000 So like, ni hao ma is hello.
00:35:59.000 But if you say, ni hao ma, like that, like I called you a horse. 1.00
00:36:03.000 What?
00:36:04.000 Yeah, it's like...
00:36:06.000 Ni hao ma. 0.97
00:36:07.000 Like how you say it is like very specific in how you say things.
00:36:13.000 So one is hello.
00:36:14.000 The other one is...
00:36:15.000 Same thing.
00:36:15.000 Ni hao ma is hello.
00:36:16.000 But ni hao ma is that way. 0.97
00:36:18.000 But if I go ni hao ma and like drag it down... 0.97
00:36:20.000 Well, my kids used to watch Ni hao Kailan.
00:36:22.000 Ni hao Kailan.
00:36:24.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:36:25.000 I think that's hey, hello, Kailan.
00:36:27.000 Why ni hao ma instead of just ni hao?
00:36:30.000 You can say ni hao.
00:36:31.000 And that's the thing.
00:36:32.000 You can say ni hao.
00:36:32.000 What is the difference between ni hao and ni hao ma?
00:36:34.000 That's just what I learned in the class.
00:36:36.000 It's like more formal?
00:36:37.000 Yeah.
00:36:38.000 Like, good evening.
00:36:39.000 Yes, you learn everything.
00:36:41.000 That's the only thing I don't like about learning languages in school.
00:36:45.000 You never learn how you speak.
00:36:48.000 You always learn how you would write a letter and how you would be grammatically correct.
00:36:53.000 So now people are doing these things where you just learn what you need to know. 0.99
00:36:58.000 I feel like humans, we all say, like, the same 20 pieces of, like, bullshit. 0.99
00:37:03.000 You know what I mean? 0.99
00:37:03.000 Like, if you could learn that, you could probably learn eight languages. 0.99
00:37:06.000 If you could just figure out, you know, what's all getting into?
00:37:11.000 Is it fun? 0.99
00:37:12.000 Where the bitches? 1.00
00:37:14.000 Can I drink? 1.00
00:37:16.000 You know, but I always, where are the bathrooms?
00:37:19.000 May I see a menu?
00:37:20.000 What are your pronouns?
00:37:21.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:37:23.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:37:24.000 And I... I'm they them.
00:37:27.000 You're they them?
00:37:28.000 Do they have they them in Japanese?
00:37:30.000 How do I remember?
00:37:31.000 It was...
00:37:32.000 My goodness.
00:37:33.000 Now I'm going to get reamed because I'm rusty on it.
00:37:36.000 But it was like...
00:37:38.000 How would I say this?
00:37:40.000 They did have it, but it was...
00:37:45.000 Honestly, the sentence structure and the way my three-year-old speaks is the way you would structure a sentence in Japanese.
00:37:51.000 He won't say the subject and the verb.
00:37:57.000 All the time.
00:37:58.000 Sometimes he would put the verb last.
00:38:00.000 Because he'll be so excited.
00:38:01.000 So he'll put adjective, adjective.
00:38:05.000 Bottle.
00:38:06.000 Great.
00:38:06.000 Good.
00:38:07.000 You see it?
00:38:08.000 And that's kind of like how you would say.
00:38:12.000 I'm like, this dude is like...
00:38:13.000 In my head, I'm like...
00:38:15.000 That's how you would speak.
00:38:16.000 So if I was to say something in Japanese, I would say...
00:38:21.000 So they would ask, what's my name?
00:38:23.000 And I would go...
00:38:27.000 Hold on.
00:38:28.000 What is my name in Japanese?
00:38:31.000 It's not Owen.
00:38:32.000 No, it's Odeen.
00:38:34.000 No, but I'm talking about Smith.
00:38:36.000 It's like Samisu.
00:38:37.000 You can't say Owen Smith?
00:38:38.000 You can, but it's like Samisu Desne.
00:38:41.000 Desne, Deska.
00:38:42.000 So that's what Deska, Deska makes it a question. 0.99
00:38:45.000 And it's at the end.
00:38:46.000 So you put that at the end.
00:38:49.000 Desne is a period.
00:38:51.000 So you would say, so it's like you're saying so it is, right?
00:38:54.000 Right.
00:38:54.000 So what would you say?
00:38:56.000 So if I go...
00:38:58.000 That means it is good.
00:39:01.000 I'm asking, is it good?
00:39:04.000 Oh, wow.
00:39:07.000 Desu.
00:39:07.000 And it depends on what part of Japan you are, how you lean into the desu.
00:39:12.000 But your name wouldn't be Smith?
00:39:13.000 It's Sumisu.
00:39:14.000 Sumisu.
00:39:15.000 Sumisu instead of Smith.
00:39:16.000 Yes.
00:39:17.000 And so you would write Sumisu in Katakana.
00:39:20.000 What if we did that to them?
00:39:23.000 You know?
00:39:24.000 So they would change Smith because it's Smith, but it's Sumisu.
00:39:27.000 How they pronounce it is Sumisu.
00:39:30.000 Sumisu.
00:39:31.000 Sumisu.
00:39:32.000 Smith.
00:39:32.000 And Sue is spelled T-S-U. So it's not...
00:39:37.000 I think...
00:39:38.000 I don't know.
00:39:39.000 I'm rusty.
00:39:39.000 This was over 20 years ago.
00:39:41.000 So you would have to change the way your name sounds.
00:39:44.000 That's so strange.
00:39:45.000 Yeah, Sumisu Destiny would be my name.
00:39:46.000 They would ask me.
00:39:47.000 Sumisu.
00:39:47.000 Yeah, Sumisu.
00:39:48.000 Sumisu.
00:39:49.000 Make them say Smith.
00:39:51.000 Don't give in.
00:39:52.000 Here you go.
00:39:53.000 This is how they take over.
00:39:54.000 This is how they take over.
00:39:55.000 Yeah.
00:39:55.000 I was intrigued, man.
00:39:57.000 The noise that you make that means you.
00:39:59.000 It was amazing.
00:40:00.000 Two things that opened my mind.
00:40:02.000 Learning Japanese, studying it for like a year, year and a half, and economics.
00:40:09.000 Learning economics.
00:40:10.000 How did that help you?
00:40:14.000 Because it's like a science and it's like a cause and effect.
00:40:17.000 And so it's the same way I approach my bits.
00:40:20.000 You know what I mean?
00:40:21.000 It's like economy. 1.00
00:40:22.000 If this happens, then it affects all this shit. 0.99
00:40:25.000 And it's all tied to the one thing you can't judge, which is human behavior. 0.99
00:40:29.000 Right?
00:40:30.000 So you don't know what people are going to do.
00:40:32.000 And people try to control it all the time. 0.98
00:40:35.000 Because it has direct effects on the stock market and how you can make money and shit. 0.96
00:40:39.000 When the coronavirus dropped, I was like, this is going to fuck up all these things. 0.92
00:40:48.000 And then seeing how people react to all these things being taken away fascinates me.
00:40:54.000 You know what I mean?
00:40:54.000 But that is what economics is.
00:40:58.000 Because when you're thinking about stuff, you always go, well, what if a pandemic happened?
00:41:03.000 Well, our system, where are the holes in our current system? 0.84
00:41:08.000 But when people are just being intellectuals about it and just, like, talking about it, it sounds boring, and you're like, but when this shit is happening in real time, you're like, this is what economists talk about all the time! 0.73
00:41:19.000 It's like, it's if this, then what?
00:41:22.000 But it's just a deeper thing, and so it's the same kind of way when you take a bit, where you just go, what if I'm talking about...
00:41:29.000 There's anything.
00:41:31.000 You just go...
00:41:34.000 I'm at home, so I was watching something where...
00:41:37.000 Oh, my son loves this cartoon called...
00:41:41.000 What's the name of this cartoon he watches?
00:41:45.000 Blaze.
00:41:46.000 It sounds like they...
00:41:47.000 But it's Blaze and the Monster Machine.
00:41:49.000 And they had, like, this one...
00:41:52.000 The episode is a giant meatball rolling down the town, destroying the town.
00:41:58.000 And they had this one...
00:41:59.000 I was clearly, like, black rollerblading, like...
00:42:02.000 Monster truck with an afro going, get down, get groovy, get down, get meatball, meatball.
00:42:10.000 And then the meatball rolls over him.
00:42:11.000 My son loves that, right?
00:42:13.000 So what I do with him is now I pretend...
00:42:18.000 That that guy was on the phone with somebody else.
00:42:21.000 And I'm like, hey, Steve, what you doing?
00:42:23.000 I'm just rollerblading.
00:42:24.000 Get down.
00:42:25.000 And then, so now my son does it.
00:42:27.000 I'm like, get a meatball, Steve.
00:42:28.000 No, Steve, get out of there!
00:42:29.000 So then we pretend that we have to break the news to Steve's family that he got ran over by a giant meatball.
00:42:34.000 So then we pretend that...
00:42:37.000 How old?
00:42:37.000 Your son is how old?
00:42:38.000 My son is three.
00:42:39.000 That's hilarious.
00:42:40.000 But then we pretend that we work with Steve and he's about to go rollerblading for lunch.
00:42:43.000 You know what I mean?
00:42:44.000 So it's just, it's the economy of, Steve, where you going rollerblading?
00:42:48.000 I'm You know, that's kind of played.
00:42:49.000 Nobody does it.
00:42:49.000 Ah, you know, it's nice outside.
00:42:51.000 And then he gets pummeled by the meatball.
00:42:54.000 So it's like, everybody who knew Steve, how did he feel about Steve?
00:42:57.000 So that's kind of like what...
00:42:59.000 The ripple effects.
00:43:00.000 It's the ripple effects.
00:43:01.000 And that's kind of like how I would think of bits in my head sometimes.
00:43:06.000 Are you paying attention to how economists are looking at the future?
00:43:10.000 Sometimes.
00:43:11.000 Like right now?
00:43:13.000 I mean, I don't even...
00:43:14.000 I haven't read any prognostications other than it's bad.
00:43:18.000 It could be like the Great Depression.
00:43:20.000 Yeah, all of that is true.
00:43:21.000 I mean, where I get lost is when they just start talking about injecting money and fixing things with money.
00:43:27.000 I'm not...
00:43:28.000 I'm lost on that.
00:43:29.000 I'm more...
00:43:31.000 Into the personal, what happens to us? 1.00
00:43:35.000 I'm fascinated with that shit. 1.00
00:43:36.000 The human nature of what's going to happen. 1.00
00:43:39.000 How are things going to change on the other side of this?
00:43:42.000 Are you going to shake hands?
00:43:45.000 How many people are going to keep wearing masks?
00:43:47.000 Keep wearing masks.
00:43:49.000 I had a classic racial thing happen to me yesterday. 0.69
00:43:53.000 I was with my son, three years old.
00:43:56.000 And this guy was working out with his shirt off in the park.
00:43:59.000 This is this big guy. 0.98
00:44:00.000 He looked kind of like ridiculous. 0.98
00:44:04.000 You said weights? 0.99
00:44:05.000 Yeah, he had two dumbbells, no shirt on.
00:44:08.000 In the park?
00:44:08.000 In the park, just doing these dumb workouts.
00:44:12.000 Me and my son see him, but my son, he knows about the social. 0.76
00:44:16.000 My son is three, man.
00:44:17.000 He's on his little scooter.
00:44:18.000 I'm on my bike to keep up with him because he's fast as hell.
00:44:21.000 And then when we're coming back, I'm walking my bike and my son has his scooter.
00:44:27.000 And we see there's like either BMW or Audi.
00:44:30.000 We see the lights go on.
00:44:33.000 And I don't think anything of it.
00:44:34.000 Then I look and it's the guy and he's like doing it like right in front of us.
00:44:39.000 Like, you know what I mean?
00:44:40.000 So it's classic.
00:44:40.000 Like, does he think I'm going to break into his car with my son or...
00:44:45.000 Like, you had all day to lock your car, man.
00:44:47.000 Like, you could have just done it when you didn't see us.
00:44:51.000 And so, like, a part of me was like, why are you doing...
00:44:53.000 He was, like, doing it so I could see he was doing...
00:44:57.000 You know what I'm trying to say?
00:44:57.000 Like, I'm walking, and he's, like, literally, like, locking his door.
00:45:02.000 And to me, it felt like...
00:45:04.000 Because I had on a mask.
00:45:05.000 I had on a mask.
00:45:07.000 And I was reading stories about how most black folks are afraid to wear masks because we look like, yo. 1.00
00:45:11.000 So a part of me was like, I'm scared of this motherfucker. 1.00
00:45:13.000 That's cool. 0.99
00:45:14.000 But a part of me was like, word with my son.
00:45:17.000 I was like, do I engage with him?
00:45:19.000 Or do I let it go?
00:45:21.000 Like, what do you do?
00:45:23.000 And I let it go because I was with my son. 0.80
00:45:26.000 And it just felt ridiculous.
00:45:29.000 But I feel like we're reverting back to like...
00:45:32.000 Those paranoid things too. 0.97
00:45:34.000 Like, oh man, black dude in a mask. 1.00
00:45:35.000 You know, like my thing.
00:45:37.000 And it was like a...
00:45:38.000 I was like, what point would I prove in...
00:45:41.000 I'm not going to change them.
00:45:42.000 You know, what do I do?
00:45:44.000 So I just...
00:45:44.000 My son didn't even see it.
00:45:46.000 I would not have seen it if he wasn't so just like clumsy and odd with it.
00:45:50.000 Like it just felt like...
00:45:52.000 Because we had passed him several times.
00:45:54.000 He could have locked his car when we were gone, you know, just done it and just kept it moving.
00:45:59.000 But it was like an obvious...
00:46:00.000 So he was like letting you know?
00:46:01.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:46:02.000 That's what it felt like to me.
00:46:03.000 I think people are losing their minds.
00:46:05.000 I think so.
00:46:06.000 I think that's a lot of what's happening.
00:46:08.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:46:09.000 Their behavior patterns are all off because they're so under duress and stress.
00:46:15.000 You know, there's a lot of people that are acting real strange.
00:46:17.000 Sometimes, you know, I'll call people up, just say hi.
00:46:21.000 Yeah.
00:46:21.000 You know, like, how you doing?
00:46:22.000 You hanging in there?
00:46:23.000 And a lot of people just seem real weirded out.
00:46:26.000 You know what it gets me, man?
00:46:27.000 Is at night.
00:46:29.000 Yeah.
00:46:29.000 Gets me at night.
00:46:30.000 Yeah.
00:46:31.000 Because during the day, I'm like, everything's...
00:46:33.000 Fucked up, but, you know, we're maintaining.
00:46:36.000 I have faith in human nature. 1.00
00:46:38.000 I have faith in society that will pull together, but at nighttime, I don't have any fucking faith. 0.99
00:46:42.000 Must be not performing either, man. 0.98
00:46:44.000 Does that?
00:46:44.000 I don't have any outlet.
00:46:45.000 There's definitely that. 0.52
00:46:46.000 But it's also at night, there's something about the darkness where I'm like, I just, you know, I do a lot of my really fucked up thinking when everyone else in my house is asleep.
00:46:57.000 Yeah.
00:46:57.000 You know?
00:46:58.000 I can relate, yeah.
00:47:00.000 That's when I spark up. 0.99
00:47:02.000 That's when I write my best shit, too, is when everyone's asleep. 0.99
00:47:04.000 So when everyone's asleep, I'm sitting around thinking like, man, what if this keeps going sideways? 0.99
00:47:10.000 What if we get a solar flare?
00:47:11.000 What if the grid goes down?
00:47:12.000 What if the earthquake hits? 1.00
00:47:14.000 What if the fucking volcano under Yellowstone blows? 0.99
00:47:16.000 What if this? 1.00
00:47:17.000 What if an asteroid hits?
00:47:18.000 What if a worse disease catches on? 1.00
00:47:20.000 What if there's a war between us and China over this bullshit? 1.00
00:47:23.000 There's a crazy letter that Germany wrote to China yesterday. 1.00
00:47:26.000 Crazy!
00:47:27.000 The head of Germany wrote some letter directly to the head guy in China talking about the only reason why you're in power is because of surveillance and what have you done to the world. 0.98
00:47:37.000 What you guys have done because of your disgusting pride and you've hidden the facts from people.
00:47:43.000 You've tried to distort the reality and because of that hundreds of thousands of people are going to die. 0.97
00:47:48.000 Whoa! 0.71
00:47:49.000 It was deep.
00:47:51.000 I was reading this letter. 1.00
00:47:52.000 Like, you never read a letter like that where a one world leader is shit, not another world leader. 1.00
00:47:57.000 It was the editor of a newspaper, it says. 1.00
00:47:59.000 Was it?
00:48:00.000 Oh, it wasn't Angela.
00:48:01.000 No, wasn't there a head guy in...
00:48:03.000 Oh, the head guy in Germany is a woman, right? 0.61
00:48:05.000 Yeah, Angela Merkel, right?
00:48:06.000 Who is it?
00:48:07.000 Editor of a prominent German newspaper.
00:48:09.000 Oh, okay.
00:48:10.000 Oh.
00:48:11.000 Well, whoever that person is.
00:48:13.000 Julian Reichelt.
00:48:15.000 Say it again?
00:48:15.000 Reichelt.
00:48:17.000 Reichelt.
00:48:18.000 Reichelt.
00:48:18.000 Reichelt.
00:48:20.000 Yeah, okay.
00:48:21.000 There's a T on the end there.
00:48:21.000 Yeah, but whatever, the articles.
00:48:24.000 It's right.
00:48:25.000 It's correct.
00:48:26.000 You know, because they...
00:48:29.000 China never they don't admit any fault ever whenever anything goes wrong They cover everything up and there's so many people that criticize the government in China.
00:48:37.000 They just wind up getting ghosted They just disappear.
00:48:39.000 They've vanished.
00:48:40.000 Yeah, they'd never hear from them again.
00:48:42.000 No one knows what to do I mean, that's that's how they run things over there.
00:48:45.000 What scares me is that and we give into that kind of like they have apps on their phone and Right now that give them a social score.
00:48:55.000 You know, so like if you jaywalk, you lose points.
00:48:57.000 Oh, yeah.
00:48:58.000 I've heard about that.
00:48:59.000 Oh, yeah.
00:48:59.000 And the guy, yeah, some guy said his social score is really bad.
00:49:02.000 And people, it's almost like Minority Report.
00:49:03.000 It's almost like Black Mirror.
00:49:05.000 Yeah.
00:49:06.000 Yeah, like that.
00:49:07.000 It's scary.
00:49:08.000 And if we give into that kind of surveillance over here.
00:49:11.000 Right.
00:49:12.000 There's a real dark end to all that stuff.
00:49:14.000 There's a real dark end. 0.98
00:49:15.000 The bright side is like, oh, well, maybe everybody will keep their shit together and be nice. 0.99
00:49:19.000 Or maybe the government will be watching every goddamn thing you do all day long and hold that over you. 0.99
00:49:26.000 And then they'll use that in order to gain more political power. 0.98
00:49:29.000 That's just as possible and more likely.
00:49:31.000 Or if your social score is like manipulated or wrong.
00:49:35.000 The downside is a lack of freedom, and that's the whole reason why the United States is so innovative.
00:49:39.000 The whole reason is this...
00:49:41.000 We have this spirit over here, this spirit of freedom, that we can do more. 0.99
00:49:48.000 We can get more shit done. 0.91
00:49:49.000 We can come up with ideas. 0.99
00:49:51.000 We celebrate this sort of creative spirit that we think of when we think of the United States.
00:49:58.000 We think of freedom, we think of creativity.
00:50:00.000 There's so much innovation done over here.
00:50:02.000 The moment you start clamping down on people and taking away freedom, you're also going to take away that creativity.
00:50:07.000 You're also going to take away that innovative thought mentality.
00:50:11.000 You're going to make people scared.
00:50:12.000 And you're going to do it just so that you can control them.
00:50:14.000 And it's the worst.
00:50:16.000 One of the things about the United States that makes it so great is that we have the ability to criticize our government. 1.00
00:50:22.000 We have the ability to talk shit. 0.99
00:50:23.000 And that keeps people in check. 0.99
00:50:25.000 Even Trump, as much as he hates it, he has toned down a lot of his rhetoric because of the criticism that he's faced.
00:50:36.000 And it's important.
00:50:38.000 It's very important.
00:50:41.000 That's one thing, this virus is making everybody have to do their job.
00:50:44.000 You realize a lot of his people were like...
00:50:47.000 Acting in positions.
00:50:50.000 They weren't really...
00:50:51.000 I don't know if you were truly vested if you're acting in it, but it's making everyone have to actually do their job. 0.96
00:50:57.000 I wonder if he would do it again, all over again, if he knew how hard it would be and how much he would get shit on. 0.96
00:51:03.000 I don't know. 0.99
00:51:04.000 I think it was so funny.
00:51:06.000 What he presented to me was like It was like the hot new nightclub.
00:51:14.000 You know what I mean?
00:51:15.000 And everybody was in there.
00:51:16.000 It was like a nightclub and you could pretend to be who you want to be.
00:51:21.000 You know what I mean?
00:51:22.000 Watered down expensive drinks and it's just all happening. 1.00
00:51:25.000 Then the coronavirus comes and that's like when the lights come on in the club and you get to see how fucked up shit really is. 0.98
00:51:36.000 And so, because when the whole country just kind of like said, all right, we're going to go with Joe Biden, regardless of how lucid you feel he is or how sharp you think he is, when the whole country was like, we're just going to go with Joe, it just made me think like Trump is like a fancy, a nice resort, 0.99
00:51:52.000 like hotel.
00:51:52.000 Like who doesn't want to stay in a nice hotel, right?
00:51:54.000 He's like, I'm rich, I'm this.
00:51:55.000 And everyone's like, I want to do that.
00:51:57.000 But after a while, you get tired of spending $21 for internet and $40 for pancakes, and you just want to go home.
00:52:03.000 And Joe was kind of...
00:52:05.000 It felt like he represents home.
00:52:08.000 You know what I mean?
00:52:08.000 Really?
00:52:09.000 I feel like people... 0.99
00:52:10.000 Joe Biden, to me, feels like a schoolhouse in a third world country that's going to collapse and kill all the kids. 0.93
00:52:16.000 A schoolhouse?
00:52:17.000 Like a schoolhouse that is made by people who skirted all the rules of construction.
00:52:24.000 He's an old dude with dementia.
00:52:26.000 But I think he's going to be propped up by so many...
00:52:29.000 Different people who are going to behold him.
00:52:31.000 Like, President Obama's gonna come out and endorse him.
00:52:33.000 If President Obama wants to come out and take over, okay.
00:52:37.000 But if he doesn't, you got Joe Biden, who's the leader of the country, who can't form sentences.
00:52:42.000 Listen, man, there's 320 million people in this country.
00:52:45.000 You're telling me that's the best the Democratic Party can do?
00:52:48.000 That's crazy.
00:52:49.000 Well, that's what I'm saying.
00:52:50.000 What I'm saying is, I feel like to everyone, he represented home.
00:52:55.000 That's what I'm saying, because he's familiar.
00:52:57.000 He was standing next to the guy that we all felt more comfortable with, especially in situations like this.
00:53:03.000 Did you see Obama's endorsement video?
00:53:05.000 I didn't.
00:53:05.000 It was straight up gaslighting.
00:53:08.000 It's just gaslighting.
00:53:09.000 He's pretending.
00:53:09.000 Can you put it up?
00:53:10.000 You can find it.
00:53:12.000 I don't know if we can play it.
00:53:13.000 Is it long or is it?
00:53:14.000 It's long enough. 0.99
00:53:15.000 He doesn't believe a goddamn word he's saying. 0.99
00:53:18.000 He has to say it. 1.00
00:53:19.000 Look, he knows Biden is doomed.
00:53:21.000 He knows he's doomed.
00:53:22.000 So you think he's going to lose.
00:53:24.000 It's not a matter of whether or not I think he's going to lose.
00:53:27.000 I do think he's going to lose.
00:53:28.000 But even if I thought he was going to win, he shouldn't do the job.
00:53:31.000 There's no way he can take the pressure of that position with the cognitive decline that he's already showing.
00:53:39.000 But...
00:53:39.000 There's no buts.
00:53:40.000 You just want the Democratic Party to be back in control.
00:53:42.000 I get it.
00:53:43.000 It makes sense.
00:53:44.000 No, I wish...
00:53:45.000 Listen, man, I wish...
00:53:49.000 Like I say, man, when you're in a nightclub, you don't care how stuff's going down, right?
00:53:54.000 Right.
00:53:54.000 But when you come out...
00:53:55.000 I don't understand this nightclub analogy.
00:53:57.000 You don't understand the analogy? 0.99
00:53:58.000 Damn, I'm trying to give you an example. 0.99
00:54:00.000 To me, just the way that Trump is handling... 0.99
00:54:05.000 I mean, any kind of criticism, anything, it's unsettling.
00:54:09.000 It's like, dude, just calm down, man.
00:54:10.000 Like, you got the gig.
00:54:11.000 You're right.
00:54:12.000 You're in charge.
00:54:12.000 It's kind of like I was talking to Keith Robinson.
00:54:14.000 He had this amazing point.
00:54:15.000 I don't know.
00:54:16.000 It just made me laugh.
00:54:17.000 He said, there should be some type of test you have to pass to become president because...
00:54:22.000 For any other thing, you have to take a test.
00:54:25.000 So you have to have degrees or whatever.
00:54:27.000 But to be in charge of everybody else, you don't have to.
00:54:30.000 All you have to do is win a popularity contest.
00:54:31.000 All you have to do is win a popularity contest.
00:54:32.000 And you're in charge.
00:54:33.000 And you control the nukes.
00:54:34.000 Everything.
00:54:35.000 And it's like a backwards thing.
00:54:37.000 And so that guy who's in charge of everybody else...
00:54:41.000 It's like, man, I just wish he didn't call so much, just wasn't the way he was, you know what I mean?
00:54:50.000 I wish he could just take the gig seriously.
00:54:52.000 The thing is, that's who he's always been.
00:54:53.000 That's my point.
00:54:54.000 And he hasn't changed at all once he got into office, and people did expect him to.
00:54:58.000 Yeah. 0.91
00:54:59.000 He's always been the guy that if anybody says anything about him, he talks mad shit about that person, whether it's Rosie O'Donnell or whoever it is that he's been in feuds with. 0.79
00:55:07.000 Right. 0.89
00:55:07.000 He's never lied to you. 0.89
00:55:09.000 And so it's like you respect all of that, but it's just like in times like this when it requires some empathy, when it requires you to look in the camera and say, I feel for the people that are dying, not...
00:55:21.000 Give me credit.
00:55:22.000 It's like, don't do the give me credit stuff now. 0.93
00:55:24.000 Give me credit stuff is ridiculous. 0.87
00:55:25.000 It's like, come on, fam. 0.71
00:55:26.000 And so I feel like, so what I'm saying is, I feel like having Joe come up there and play those notes, it feels like people, how everyone just all of a sudden overnight goes, Joe Biden's our guy.
00:55:38.000 It felt like everyone was like, I just want to.
00:55:40.000 I think it's like when Mariah Carey was on Pills and she couldn't sing the national anthem because she forgot the words. 0.99
00:55:46.000 Dude, there's no fucking way, man. 0.99
00:55:48.000 That guy can't be president. 1.00
00:55:49.000 He can't talk.
00:55:51.000 He can't hold a sentence.
00:55:52.000 You give him a couple minutes on CNN and he can't keep it together.
00:55:56.000 What is he going to be like after a year in office dealing with international politics, the economy, the environment, all these different things?
00:56:02.000 But what I'm saying is he's going to have...
00:56:05.000 People.
00:56:06.000 So did Obama, but look how old he got.
00:56:07.000 How quickly.
00:56:08.000 And Obama's brilliant.
00:56:10.000 Obama's a brilliant, articulate guy.
00:56:11.000 He started getting gray hair.
00:56:13.000 His skin started sagging.
00:56:15.000 Yes, because he was actually reading the memos that came through. 1.00
00:56:17.000 He was actually going, this shit is crazy. 1.00
00:56:20.000 Right, that's my point. 1.00
00:56:21.000 My man Trump hasn't aged, man.
00:56:23.000 Right, but if Biden starts reading those things, he'll be dead in a week.
00:56:25.000 And then who's going to be the vice president?
00:56:26.000 Elizabeth Warren?
00:56:27.000 Who are they going to put in there?
00:56:28.000 No, they're probably...
00:56:29.000 I don't know who they're going to pick.
00:56:31.000 They said he wants to pick a woman of color. 0.98
00:56:34.000 He said a woman of color for the Supreme Court. 0.55
00:56:37.000 Oh, is that what he said?
00:56:38.000 I thought he said for the Vice President to pick.
00:56:40.000 He should.
00:56:41.000 Should he?
00:56:41.000 Or should he pick the best person?
00:56:43.000 He should pick the best person who will probably be a woman of color. 1.00
00:56:47.000 Why would it be a woman of color, though? 0.99
00:56:51.000 The most...
00:56:52.000 Would it be because they're underrepresented and it would be a good thing for the country? 1.00
00:56:56.000 Or would it be a good thing for the country because it's the best person for the job?
00:57:02.000 Both.
00:57:02.000 The best person for the job, I feel, could be a woman of color.
00:57:08.000 And the best person for this country could also be a woman of color. 1.00
00:57:11.000 It could be.
00:57:12.000 Because a lot of policies kind of stop before consulting with people of color.
00:57:21.000 And a woman of color can see... 0.98
00:57:23.000 Hey, well, we're leaving out this group.
00:57:25.000 Let's figure this out.
00:57:26.000 But what if it's a male of color who's better qualified for the job? 0.99
00:57:31.000 But that's my point.
00:57:32.000 What are the qualifications for this job is what I just said.
00:57:35.000 There's no test you have to take.
00:57:36.000 It's just a popularity contest.
00:57:38.000 Well, if that's the case, then the only reason why a woman of color would be would be what? 1.00
00:57:42.000 Why would you want a woman of color? 1.00
00:57:44.000 I think everyone would just feel better if there was a woman of color in charge. 1.00
00:57:50.000 I feel like...
00:57:52.000 What did Chelsea Handler say when she did her whole thing? 1.00
00:57:55.000 Remember, she just did a whole thing about something on Netflix, and she went on Ellen and said, we need to start listening to women of color. 1.00
00:58:04.000 It was like, yeah, you probably should.
00:58:07.000 I think...
00:58:09.000 I'm not the right person to be talking about this, but I feel like, you know, they say Stacey Abrams is in the running, and I don't think she'd be a bad choice.
00:58:20.000 But I've watched how she just puts things in context, and she is very smart, very sharp, and she is not thrown, like, she would be extremely qualified.
00:58:33.000 Well, I'll tell you who could actually be president.
00:58:36.000 Who?
00:58:36.000 Michelle Obama.
00:58:37.000 She's not going to do it.
00:58:38.000 She's not going to do it.
00:58:39.000 No.
00:58:40.000 But if she wanted to do it, she could be president. 0.99
00:58:43.000 Why do you think she could do it? 0.98
00:58:44.000 First of all, she's brilliant.
00:58:45.000 She's articulate.
00:58:46.000 She's well-known.
00:58:48.000 She's a powerful person. 0.57
00:58:50.000 She speaks really well.
00:58:52.000 She obviously was for two terms, she was the first lady. 1.00
00:58:58.000 So she's accustomed to the public eye.
00:59:00.000 She's accustomed to speaking publicly.
00:59:02.000 Dude, if she stepped up and decided she would run for president, I think she'd win by a landslide. 1.00
00:59:07.000 Because it's a popularity contest at this point.
00:59:09.000 Maybe not beat Trump, I should say, but win the Democratic nominee by a landslide, I really think.
00:59:14.000 You think she would lose as well, though?
00:59:16.000 I don't know.
00:59:16.000 I don't know how it works.
00:59:18.000 It's complicated, right?
00:59:19.000 And especially when you're dealing with electoral college.
00:59:22.000 Like, look, Trump lost the popular vote, but he won the electoral college vote.
00:59:26.000 Right.
00:59:26.000 And that's why they say Joe Biden was the best bet, because Joe Biden, so Pennsylvania is a swing state, and Joe Biden is the only person out of the Democratic nominees who did not say he was against fracking.
00:59:38.000 He was like, you can't do it all at once.
00:59:42.000 And then they had the clip of the fracking protest, and he was like, go vote for somebody else, man.
00:59:47.000 Joe was like, go vote for somebody else.
00:59:49.000 And so...
00:59:50.000 Trump, they were saying that Trump does not feel like he can beat Joe in Pennsylvania, because that's where Joe's from.
00:59:55.000 And he also supports, he has an in with, you know, the coal miners and the fracking industry, just like, you know, Trump.
01:00:02.000 So when it comes to those Electoral College votes, Trump knows he can't beat him.
01:00:08.000 That's why, hence the whole Ukrainian, get some dirt on him, just announce something's happening type thing. 1.00
01:00:13.000 That was kind of like the narrative of that.
01:00:15.000 And so when it comes to electoral votes, that whole Midwest game, that whole Michigan, Michigan, Biden is right there.
01:00:24.000 And that's what I'm saying.
01:00:25.000 I don't know if he is, man.
01:00:26.000 I don't know what's going to happen once people start hearing him talk on the campaign trail.
01:00:32.000 But I don't know how brilliant or articulate Trump is.
01:00:38.000 It's not a matter of brilliance.
01:00:40.000 It's a matter of being able to control crowds and have these exciting rallies.
01:00:44.000 He does arenas, dude.
01:00:45.000 He does sold out arenas and he kills.
01:00:49.000 Listen, I'm just looking at it objectively.
01:00:52.000 I know you want a Democrat to win, right?
01:00:55.000 And you want a woman of color to be the vice president. 1.00
01:00:57.000 You want Biden to win.
01:00:58.000 I would love that.
01:00:59.000 I would love for...
01:01:01.000 I'm not saying...
01:01:02.000 I would love for things to feel like they're...
01:01:07.000 I don't want to say back to normal, but I would just love to feel like...
01:01:13.000 They're not the way they are right now.
01:01:15.000 That is not like, that was a horrible question.
01:01:18.000 That's a nasty question.
01:01:20.000 It's bad in those ways.
01:01:25.000 But what I'm talking about is his ability to excite his base and the ability to get people behind him.
01:01:33.000 He's an unprecedented ability.
01:01:34.000 And depending upon how he handles this coronavirus crisis, it could swing left or right.
01:01:39.000 It really depends entirely upon who Biden picks.
01:01:44.000 Because you remember when George W. was president, it really was like President Dick Cheney. 0.99
01:01:50.000 Dick Cheney was in that fucking vampire underground bunker, getting fresh blood pumped into him every day. 1.00
01:01:57.000 Calling all the shots. 1.00
01:01:58.000 Do you remember there was one point in time where Cheney was consistently in the bunker?
01:02:02.000 He was in the bunker for like weeks at a time.
01:02:04.000 They even told us he was in a bunker, but just in case anything happens. 0.99
01:02:08.000 Like, why isn't Bush in a fucking bunker? 0.99
01:02:10.000 He's the president! 1.00
01:02:12.000 Dick Cheney was out there calling the shots.
01:02:14.000 It was one of the most transparent times when you see the connection between industry and government where you have a guy who was the former CEO of Halliburton, a company that rebuilds countries after we blow them up, getting no-bid contracts to rebuild a country that we blew up while he's making the decisions to blow up these countries.
01:02:35.000 It's crazy.
01:02:35.000 It was crazy.
01:02:36.000 It was crazy.
01:02:37.000 And you couldn't stop it.
01:02:38.000 Right.
01:02:39.000 But if someone comes along, and some powerful speaker, someone who you really...
01:02:43.000 I mean, there's several choices, apparently.
01:02:46.000 And if they pick someone, and I'm sure they're grooming someone right now, who you get excited about, you go, okay, this person could step up if Biden lost, or if Biden lost it, or if Biden died, which is also possible. 0.98
01:03:02.000 Bro, there's a photo of him that was on the New York Times yesterday where you could see where they gave him the fucking facelift. 0.90
01:03:10.000 He's talking and his skin is unnaturally pulled up and back. 0.99
01:03:14.000 It's like, oh Christ, man.
01:03:17.000 Maybe 20 years ago.
01:03:18.000 Maybe 20 years ago, but not now.
01:03:19.000 This is crazy.
01:03:20.000 Hey, man.
01:03:21.000 All I know is like when he was talking about all the stuff he would have done if this crossed his desk.
01:03:26.000 Like, you know, and just having an awareness of how the government works.
01:03:30.000 Like what?
01:03:31.000 Well, the, what was it, the Pandemic Agency was closed down.
01:03:36.000 And what I love about Trump, he was honest, he was like, man, ain't nobody thought this was going to happen.
01:03:39.000 Like, he literally, he just said it.
01:03:42.000 So he was like, get rid of him.
01:03:43.000 But...
01:03:44.000 Then there's all types of protocols and you find out where the money is for this.
01:03:48.000 Joe had just a knowledge of where all that stuff was.
01:03:53.000 And I feel like Trump talks to his lawyers.
01:03:56.000 Like, what can I do?
01:03:57.000 What can I do?
01:03:58.000 What can I do?
01:03:58.000 What can I do?
01:03:59.000 And he just goes...
01:04:01.000 Then he takes his stance based on what he has known he's going to be protected legally, and he doesn't equate that he's president of all of us.
01:04:10.000 You know what I mean?
01:04:11.000 So I just feel like that's what's missing, and he is incapable of doing that.
01:04:15.000 I know when Pence had the mic...
01:04:18.000 And Pence was getting popular.
01:04:19.000 It ate at Trump.
01:04:20.000 And he was like, man, let me come and do these.
01:04:22.000 How does that guy get popular?
01:04:24.000 How does, first of all, you want to talk about a vice president?
01:04:27.000 I don't know what that guy's voice sounds like.
01:04:29.000 Dude, well, people were just happy to hear somebody not yelling back at people.
01:04:32.000 He was like, we're going to have that by the end of the week. 0.98
01:04:35.000 Did you ever see there's a woman who has one of them pink pussy hats on? 1.00
01:04:38.000 And there's a bunch of people that are yelling, impeach Trump, impeach Trump. 0.99
01:04:41.000 And she's running like, yay, President Pence, President Pence. 0.99
01:04:44.000 And they're like, what?
01:04:45.000 Like, yeah, if Trump gets impeached, then Pence becomes president.
01:04:49.000 She's like, yeah, maybe we should not impeach him.
01:04:51.000 And they're like, yeah, maybe.
01:04:52.000 Yeah, yeah, that was so funny.
01:04:54.000 It's become so emotional, right?
01:04:57.000 And I feel like Trump's a businessman, so he's not approaching this.
01:05:04.000 Any emotion. 0.96
01:05:05.000 It fucks with people because they're like, yo, you know. 0.88
01:05:08.000 Well, the good thing that he did was block travel from China. 0.97
01:05:12.000 That's a good thing.
01:05:13.000 It probably saved thousands of lives.
01:05:15.000 It really did.
01:05:15.000 And a lot of people are saying you're crazy for doing that.
01:05:18.000 But there's also so many fucking people that are pointing fingers. 0.99
01:05:22.000 But then they're also saying that he actually didn't. 0.99
01:05:23.000 They were saying that people were still coming from China.
01:05:26.000 So...
01:05:26.000 What do you mean he actually didn't?
01:05:27.000 I don't know.
01:05:28.000 I just heard...
01:05:28.000 That's what I'm saying.
01:05:29.000 I was saying conflicting...
01:05:30.000 No, they definitely blocked travel.
01:05:31.000 He blocked travel, but they were saying people were still coming.
01:05:34.000 Well, maybe some people had loopholes because of diplomatic reasons or business reasons or whatever, but they did.
01:05:41.000 Look, man, there was a video that Eddie Bravo had on his page of Nancy Pelosi in February telling people to go out and go to Chinatown.
01:05:49.000 There's no worries.
01:05:49.000 Just go out and mingle.
01:05:50.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
01:05:51.000 And then they confronted her. 1.00
01:05:52.000 Chris Wallace confronted her on Fox News, and she was just...
01:05:55.000 Bullshitting her way out of this while she was blaming the president.
01:05:58.000 Look, everybody got this wrong. 0.98
01:06:00.000 Everybody got it wrong.
01:06:01.000 Everybody did.
01:06:03.000 430,000 people have traveled from China to U.S. since the coronavirus surfaced.
01:06:07.000 But the coronavirus surfaced.
01:06:11.000 I think this is just an article about...
01:06:14.000 Yeah, I understand the article is recent.
01:06:16.000 But this is an article about when the coronavirus surfaced, which was in January.
01:06:20.000 That's just letting people know how many people...
01:06:23.000 Surfaced here?
01:06:23.000 Made it over to America.
01:06:25.000 But that's not how many people came to America.
01:06:29.000 This is since Chinese officials disclosed the outbreak on New Year's Eve.
01:06:34.000 Two months after President Trump imposed restrictions.
01:06:37.000 40,000 is a lot, man.
01:06:38.000 40,000 since the President's imposed restrictions.
01:06:41.000 So what kind of restrictions were those?
01:06:43.000 The bulk of the travelers who were of multiple nationalities arrived in January at airports in Los Angeles, San Francisco, New York, Chicago, Newark, and Detroit. 0.52
01:06:52.000 All places fucked by coronavirus. 0.96
01:06:54.000 Oh, hot spots, baby. 0.99
01:06:54.000 So it's like, what are you talking about right now? 0.99
01:06:56.000 They flew directly from Wuhan. 0.99
01:06:58.000 Have you seen all the shit that points to the fact that this came from a lab? 0.99
01:07:02.000 Well, yeah. 0.99
01:07:03.000 You know what's so funny?
01:07:04.000 I was talking to...
01:07:04.000 I can't say what I'm saying.
01:07:06.000 But they were like, this was a chemical thing that just got out of hand. 1.00
01:07:09.000 They were like, they fucked up. 0.97
01:07:11.000 Well, they were working on how to mitigate viruses. 1.00
01:07:14.000 That's what they were doing.
01:07:15.000 They were working on...
01:07:16.000 And they had viruses in this lab in Wuhan.
01:07:20.000 And they think it came out.
01:07:22.000 And that's one of the reasons why they think China immediately blames it on the wet market.
01:07:25.000 They said, whenever China blames it on something, always look deeper.
01:07:29.000 Ah!
01:07:30.000 There's a ton of scientists that are pointing to that.
01:07:35.000 There's one French virologist.
01:07:37.000 Jamie, I'll send you this.
01:07:38.000 There's a French virologist who identified HIV. And this French virologist was looking at this disease and he was like, this is not a disease that came from nature.
01:07:49.000 This is a disease that came from a lab.
01:07:51.000 Did you see that Facebook video where there's some series on Netflix?
01:07:57.000 What is it?
01:07:58.000 It's a series on Netflix that takes place in China that like two or three years ago they called the coronavirus and they like played the thing.
01:08:09.000 Really?
01:08:09.000 Yeah.
01:08:10.000 It was like episode 13, season 3 or something like that of this show.
01:08:14.000 Jesus Christ.
01:08:15.000 Man, they knew this stuff was happening.
01:08:17.000 Well, people knew that it was always a possibility.
01:08:20.000 I can't believe it.
01:08:21.000 I'm in this text thread.
01:08:22.000 But it's here now, and it's just like the reset of, like, oh, that's another thing that's interesting.
01:08:27.000 Like, what it's doing to our TV industry.
01:08:29.000 Like, it feels like everything has become YouTube, you know?
01:08:34.000 Yes.
01:08:34.000 You know what I mean?
01:08:34.000 Like, all the time.
01:08:35.000 I know!
01:08:36.000 Even CNN. Everybody's trying to do you right now.
01:08:39.000 Everybody is doing...
01:08:42.000 Well, the weird thing is they're trying to do it, but they're not adapting.
01:08:45.000 Right.
01:08:46.000 They're not adapting to the fact they've got no audience. 0.97
01:08:48.000 So they're doing these whack-ass monologues. 0.55
01:08:50.000 You know who's doing it well? 0.96
01:08:51.000 Who?
01:08:51.000 Bill Maher.
01:08:52.000 Yeah!
01:08:53.000 With the fake audience and having fun with it.
01:08:55.000 He's having a great time.
01:08:56.000 Also, he has...
01:08:57.000 Here, French virologist.
01:08:59.000 I'll send you this right now, Jamie.
01:09:00.000 Hold on a second. 0.99
01:09:02.000 Bill Maher has some great fucking rants. 0.99
01:09:05.000 I mean, I've tweeted twice to him where I said, Bravo. 0.99
01:09:10.000 Nice.
01:09:11.000 Are you playing it?
01:09:13.000 Oh, it's on my phone.
01:09:15.000 Where's the sound coming from?
01:09:16.000 I just sent it to you.
01:09:17.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:09:18.000 His fucking shit has been great. 1.00
01:09:20.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:09:21.000 Hilarious.
01:09:21.000 And also, you know, he's pushing all the buttons, you know?
01:09:26.000 He's doing comedy.
01:09:28.000 He's doing like real edgy comedy while he's pointing out how crazy this all is.
01:09:34.000 I appreciate him right now.
01:09:36.000 He's a guy who's on the left that I really like the fact that he doesn't give in to all the craziness.
01:09:43.000 He doesn't give in to the lunacy of left-wing policies.
01:09:49.000 He's still...
01:09:52.000 Rational about it all.
01:09:53.000 Although, clearly, left-wing biased, he's still rational.
01:09:57.000 And still goes with comedy.
01:10:00.000 I don't know, man.
01:10:02.000 I like him a lot. 0.97
01:10:04.000 I feel like a butt's coming.
01:10:05.000 No, because I watch some of his stuff. 0.62
01:10:08.000 And I feel like it's two things.
01:10:10.000 He should have me on this show, basically.
01:10:12.000 Because he's always...
01:10:13.000 He would have you on a show.
01:10:14.000 He's always talking about kids. 1.00
01:10:15.000 He don't know what the fuck he's talking about. 0.99
01:10:17.000 And he's always talking about... 1.00
01:10:20.000 But I love how he attacks it, like he knows, but it's like, ah, dude, that's your shit, but that's not it. 0.99
01:10:28.000 Or he'll be talking about, he did this whole rant about, why can't we call it the China disease and all that stuff? 0.98
01:10:37.000 And I was listening to a Chinese American on The Daily and Talking about her experience of feeling like being an Asian American here was always like a probationary experience.
01:10:52.000 As long as I did the right things and stayed out the way, people left me alone. 0.99
01:10:55.000 But when this came up, just her going outside, people were like, you fucking Chinese? 0.98
01:11:01.000 And it's kind of like... 0.99
01:11:03.000 To me, I love watching him because it's also these blind spots that he just...
01:11:11.000 His whole rant was really about stop these wet markets.
01:11:14.000 You can do it.
01:11:15.000 He didn't have to do the other side of it.
01:11:18.000 Well, here's the thing about when they called it the Chinese virus, they don't want to call anything a virus based on the country.
01:11:22.000 They would call it the Wuhan virus.
01:11:24.000 Yeah.
01:11:24.000 That's like they call Lyme disease Lyme disease.
01:11:26.000 That was one of the examples that he used.
01:11:28.000 Or like SARS or MERS, which is a Middle Eastern respiratory disease.
01:11:32.000 But he didn't make that point.
01:11:33.000 He didn't say he called it the Wuhan virus.
01:11:34.000 Right.
01:11:34.000 He should have said.
01:11:36.000 And that's what I'm saying.
01:11:37.000 The problem is, yeah.
01:11:38.000 The problem is that he's trying to do comedy, and he's trying to make a point at the same time.
01:11:43.000 And really, the right way would be to call it the Wuhan virus.
01:11:47.000 But when they called it COVID-19, then it becomes the whole world's problems.
01:11:52.000 That's one of the differences between what that journalist in Germany was saying to the head of China.
01:11:57.000 He was saying that, and then the Chinese guy was saying, hey, this is the whole world's problem, this whole world's pandemic. 0.98
01:12:03.000 But... 0.99
01:12:04.000 Yeah, kinda, but it did come from a fucking, if it did, if it did come from a lab, you know. 0.99
01:12:09.000 Right. 0.98
01:12:09.000 We should call it the lab-created Wuhan virus. 0.98
01:12:12.000 There you go, but it's more specific.
01:12:14.000 Here it is.
01:12:15.000 Inaccurately claims the novel coronavirus is man-made and contains genetic material from HIV. Okay, so this guy is Nobel laureate Luc Montagnier.
01:12:25.000 Do you speak French at all?
01:12:27.000 Nah, nah, I didn't get there.
01:12:28.000 So how do we know that this guy's correct?
01:12:31.000 It says genomic analysis.
01:12:34.000 Can you make that a little bigger?
01:12:36.000 It says, indicates the virus has a natural origin.
01:12:39.000 It was not engineered.
01:12:40.000 The so-called unique protein sequence insertions found the 2019 coronavirus can be found in many other organisms, not just HIV. But that doesn't mean it's organic or natural in origin.
01:12:50.000 See, I think that we are right now in this period of conflicting information, and you're going to get it bouncing back and forth from pro to con, but I've read multiple sources.
01:13:01.000 That seem, and from respected scientists, it seemed to indicate that there's a distinct possibility that came from that lab.
01:13:08.000 One of the things they're saying is the actual bats that they sequenced the genome, when they found the genetics for this virus, the bats that tested, you know, where this originated from, were the same, they're from the same exact location as the bats that they do research on in this lab.
01:13:27.000 And the lab is four miles away.
01:13:28.000 I mean, it's not outside the realm of possibility.
01:13:31.000 I mean, we're in the wheelhouse right there.
01:13:33.000 Yeah, yeah. 1.00
01:13:33.000 Well, obviously, I'm a moron. 1.00
01:13:35.000 I don't know shit about viruses other than what I read. 0.99
01:13:37.000 But when China says, oh, definitely a wet market. 0.96
01:13:40.000 Nothing to see here.
01:13:41.000 Sorry.
01:13:41.000 That's a great point.
01:13:42.000 Look deeper.
01:13:42.000 Yeah, I don't know.
01:13:44.000 I mean, maybe it was a wet market.
01:13:45.000 Maybe it wasn't a wet market.
01:13:47.000 Like, fresh mat.
01:13:48.000 Right. 1.00
01:13:49.000 Yeah, well, the wet markets are fucking gross. 0.99
01:13:51.000 You know, it is... 0.99
01:13:53.000 But that's also a sad thing about you're trying to feed a billion people and you're feeding them wildlife.
01:13:58.000 A lot of what they're eating is wildlife.
01:14:00.000 It's equivalent to squirrels and stuff here.
01:14:03.000 Exactly.
01:14:04.000 They're eating whatever they can eat.
01:14:06.000 You know pigeons were brought over here as food?
01:14:08.000 From where?
01:14:09.000 From other countries.
01:14:10.000 From Europe, I believe.
01:14:11.000 You know palm trees were brought over here?
01:14:12.000 Yes.
01:14:13.000 They're not native at all to California.
01:14:15.000 Isn't that crazy?
01:14:15.000 LA is palm trees.
01:14:18.000 Like Cub Swanson, he's got fights in the UFC. He's got SoCal tattooed on his stomach with two palm trees.
01:14:24.000 Like, bitch, those are Hawaiian. 1.00
01:14:25.000 Those are Hawaiian! 1.00
01:14:28.000 It's like, once you know stuff, you can't unknow it, and it's like, sometimes...
01:14:33.000 I know, that's a weird one.
01:14:34.000 Palm trees are a weird one.
01:14:35.000 Because you're like, what?
01:14:36.000 How many did they bring over here?
01:14:38.000 Yeah.
01:14:39.000 They steal all the palm trees?
01:14:41.000 Yeah.
01:14:41.000 Yeah, that's a weird one.
01:14:43.000 Yeah, they're normally in climates with hurricanes and shit, because they can withstand the... 0.99
01:14:48.000 They would stand the fuck out of some wind, right? 0.99
01:14:51.000 When was the last time you saw a palm tree that fell over? 0.96
01:14:53.000 Snap. 1.00
01:14:53.000 Those motherfuckers just... 1.00
01:14:55.000 They just take it. 1.00
01:14:57.000 What wind?
01:14:57.000 They just take it.
01:14:58.000 Yeah, wind.
01:14:59.000 Yeah.
01:15:00.000 They're not worried about wind at all.
01:15:01.000 No.
01:15:01.000 How crazy is that that a plant evolved to be able to handle the winds?
01:15:06.000 Right, right.
01:15:07.000 And so my brain is working like, you know...
01:15:10.000 The palm trees that couldn't stand it, you know, they're telling, hey man, you better, winds are coming.
01:15:16.000 Dude, I love Hawaii. 1.00
01:15:17.000 I love how Hawaii is like, fuck you, no one's coming here. 1.00
01:15:21.000 Man. 1.00
01:15:21.000 Stay out. 1.00
01:15:22.000 Stay out.
01:15:22.000 Stay out.
01:15:23.000 We got some beautiful islands.
01:15:24.000 We're just going to sit tight and eat fish for a couple weeks.
01:15:27.000 You ain't gonna find the Applebee's in Hawaii. 0.99
01:15:29.000 You ain't gonna find the fucking Fridays or Chili's. 0.99
01:15:33.000 Oh, none of that. 0.99
01:15:33.000 I proposed to my wife in Maui. 0.99
01:15:35.000 Did you really?
01:15:36.000 One of the best times of my life.
01:15:38.000 I love it there.
01:15:39.000 I love it there.
01:15:40.000 I go to Hawaii every year to bow hunt.
01:15:42.000 Oh, yeah?
01:15:43.000 I go to Lanai, yeah.
01:15:43.000 Oh, man, yeah.
01:15:44.000 One-tenth of my meat that I eat from a year comes from Hawaii.
01:15:48.000 That's dope. 0.93
01:15:49.000 You know what's crazy?
01:15:50.000 I will say to anybody listening, if you're not married yet, keep a nice file of photographs of before y'all had kids.
01:16:00.000 Because I sent my wife a picture of us in Hawaii and it made her weak. 0.93
01:16:04.000 She was just like, I remember us when we were people.
01:16:08.000 When we were people.
01:16:09.000 Well, everybody feels like that now.
01:16:11.000 Everybody's like a prisoner.
01:16:12.000 Yeah.
01:16:12.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:16:14.000 You see how Ellen got in trouble for saying that? 0.91
01:16:16.000 What did she say?
01:16:17.000 It's actually a hilarious joke.
01:16:19.000 She goes, I feel like I'm in prison. 0.87
01:16:20.000 She goes, I've been wearing the same clothes for 10 days and everyone's gay. 1.00
01:16:25.000 That's a funny joke!
01:16:27.000 But then people are like, Ellen needs to be educated about the realities of prison. 1.00
01:16:32.000 Like, yeah, but also it's just a joke, okay?
01:16:37.000 Jokes can't coexist with the need to be factual at every turn.
01:16:42.000 They can't.
01:16:45.000 Yes, you're right.
01:16:46.000 You're right.
01:16:47.000 She should be sensitive about...
01:16:50.000 But how do you know that she's not also sensitive about incarceration? 0.99
01:16:54.000 Look, incarceration is fucked up. 1.00
01:16:56.000 It's fucked up. 0.99
01:16:58.000 And I don't know what the solution is, but I do know that it's not going to rehabilitate anybody. 0.99
01:17:03.000 I mean, if you get rehabilitated while you're in prison, all the people that I know that have been in prison, that's up to you. 0.99
01:17:09.000 They'll offer you classes, but you're dealing with so much chaos while you're in there, and so much danger, and so much fucked up shit. 1.00
01:17:18.000 If you get rehabilitated because of that, You're a strong motherfucker. 1.00
01:17:21.000 Yeah, you're a strong motherfucker. 1.00
01:17:23.000 But there's people that, like, one of my favorite examples is Bernard Hopkins. 0.99
01:17:27.000 Bernard Hopkins, who was one of the greatest boxers of all time, and also one of the ones who had the longest career of all time.
01:17:34.000 I mean, at an elite, world-class level, was beating world-class fighters deep into his 40s.
01:17:41.000 Fought his last fight, I think it was 51. Bernard Hopkins did a stint in jail.
01:17:47.000 And when he came out, one of the guys in the jail, one of the guards said, you'll be back. 0.99
01:17:54.000 And he's like, the fuck I will. 0.99
01:17:57.000 And his discipline was legendary. 0.99
01:18:00.000 Because he never wanted to be back then.
01:18:02.000 The execution of the mask.
01:18:03.000 So a friend of mine, Dan in green, he did a documentary.
01:18:07.000 It's a group of guys in Philly called the Executioners.
01:18:11.000 It's a fascinating documentary.
01:18:14.000 I think he either took the name or adopted it or whatever Bernard Hopkins did.
01:18:19.000 From them?
01:18:19.000 Yeah.
01:18:20.000 It was a bunch of cats from a troubled area, but they found boxing and started having success as the Executioners.
01:18:30.000 They would wear the mask and the ring and all of that. 0.99
01:18:32.000 No shit. 0.99
01:18:33.000 Bernard kind of adopted it. 0.99
01:18:35.000 Well, you know, he abandoned it later on in his career because people were trying to figure out why he's so good this late in life.
01:18:40.000 So he became Da Alien. 0.60
01:18:41.000 Yep.
01:18:42.000 So it's bhopdaalien on Instagram.
01:18:46.000 On Instagram, yeah. 0.99
01:18:46.000 Because people are like, how the fuck are you beating the shit out of everybody when you're in your late 40s? 0.99
01:18:50.000 Yes, yeah. 0.99
01:18:51.000 He's like, I'm an alien.
01:18:53.000 He was just super technical and disciplined and never did dumb things inside the ring.
01:19:01.000 Just did everything technically and always erred on the side of defense.
01:19:06.000 His defense was impeccable.
01:19:08.000 That's how I live life offstage.
01:19:09.000 I'm telling you.
01:19:11.000 Bernard Hopkins style.
01:19:13.000 You know a great example of that is the difference between Roy Jones Jr. and his prime, who I think is one of the greatest of all time, if not the greatest. 0.97
01:19:21.000 Roy Jones Jr. in his prime was fucking untouchable.
01:19:24.000 But then when Roy got a little older and a little slower, Bernard and him fought twice. 0.97
01:19:31.000 Twice.
01:19:31.000 They fought once and Roy beat him by decision and they fought later on when Bernard was actually older than Roy.
01:19:39.000 And Bernard beat Roy by decision pretty decisively because Bernard's fundamentals and his technical ability was rock solid.
01:19:47.000 Whereas Roy never, I won't say never threw a jab, but rarely threw a jab, would leap in with a left hook. 0.99
01:19:53.000 Because his left hook was so preposterous, like he could get away with crazy shit. 1.00
01:19:58.000 Hands down, moving around. 0.99
01:19:59.000 He's the only fighter on record for CompuBox that won an entire round of a championship fight without having one punch landed on him.
01:20:07.000 Do you know how crazy that is?
01:20:08.000 Whoa! 0.71
01:20:09.000 Against a world champion, against Vinny Pazienza.
01:20:11.000 They fought an entire round where Pazienza didn't land one punch. 1.00
01:20:15.000 Fuck! 1.00
01:20:16.000 I would quit. 1.00
01:20:17.000 If I was Vinny...
01:20:19.000 He would never quit. 0.99
01:20:20.000 Vinny Pazianza would never fucking quit. 0.99
01:20:21.000 He would die before he would quit. 0.99
01:20:23.000 And he almost did. 0.99
01:20:24.000 Roy beat the fuck out of him. 0.99
01:20:26.000 And when Roy was stopping him, Roy dropped him, was beating his ass, and looked at the referee and was like, please stop this fight. 0.99
01:20:31.000 And the referee was like, keep fighting. 0.98
01:20:33.000 He was like, okay.
01:20:34.000 And then he went, bing, bing!
01:20:35.000 And then put him away.
01:20:36.000 But he was like, I didn't have to do that.
01:20:38.000 He was letting him know, this fight is over, man.
01:20:41.000 This fight's over.
01:20:42.000 Stop this.
01:20:43.000 Stop this guy.
01:20:45.000 Man, I keep forgetting to get the name of the place.
01:20:47.000 When I lived in Chicago, there used to be a spot on the north side where on Thursday nights they would put a boxing ring on the entire floor. 0.82
01:20:55.000 And when you walk in, if you had beef with somebody, you could sign up.
01:21:00.000 And you would go.
01:21:01.000 And it was all these thugs and these gang dudes and whatever would try to fight.
01:21:06.000 And you would see how out of shape people were in real time, like in the ring.
01:21:10.000 And then they would always end it with a...
01:21:13.000 Or like an amateur professional.
01:21:14.000 And you can try to fight him if you want. 0.99
01:21:16.000 And that's when you would see the importance of fucking technique. 0.99
01:21:19.000 Because you would have all these dudes who look like they could put in work. 0.99
01:21:23.000 But man, that dude would just stand there and just jab, jab.
01:21:26.000 But it was so solid, he would never get tired.
01:21:29.000 He'd just be knocking these dudes.
01:21:32.000 And you would stand on a second.
01:21:35.000 And what happens is people start fighting really hard for like the first 30 seconds.
01:21:38.000 And they get winded and they don't throw punches.
01:21:40.000 So you could throw lemons at them to make them... 1.00
01:21:42.000 And so you talking all that shit? 1.00
01:21:44.000 And it was like the funnest Thursday night. 1.00
01:21:47.000 We would do it every Thursday and go. 0.99
01:21:49.000 And that's when I first started getting into, oh shit, technique is everything. 0.99
01:21:52.000 It's everything. 0.99
01:21:53.000 That professional would just step up there and just like not be phased. 0.97
01:21:57.000 And I'm talking about on the street, if you saw any of these guys, you would be like, I ain't fucking with that dude. 0.98
01:22:01.000 Right. 0.81
01:22:01.000 But he knew after 45 seconds, they can't... 0.81
01:22:04.000 It's a rap.
01:22:05.000 They're going to be winded.
01:22:06.000 They're going to be tired.
01:22:07.000 And then he...
01:22:07.000 Next.
01:22:09.000 It was amazing to watch.
01:22:10.000 So when... 0.99
01:22:11.000 When you talk about that guy didn't land a punch in it, God damn it. 0.98
01:22:14.000 And he's a world champion. 0.99
01:22:16.000 I mean, he's an elite boxer.
01:22:19.000 That's how good Roy Jones Jr. was.
01:22:21.000 Roy Jones Jr., when he was at his best, people forget, man.
01:22:26.000 They forget.
01:22:27.000 There was a Nas song with the new Mike Tyson's Roy Jones.
01:22:31.000 People forget.
01:22:33.000 There was a time, and Roy had a song about it.
01:22:35.000 It's called Y'all Must Have Forgot.
01:22:36.000 Y'all Must Have Forgot.
01:22:37.000 You know what's crazy is that I was just thinking about that in terms of our business.
01:22:42.000 Because my wife and I, we were trying to recall an old TV show.
01:22:47.000 And we couldn't really figure out the details of it. 0.98
01:22:50.000 But being in writers' rooms and shit, you'd know how much people pine over certain things and arguments happening and all this shit. 0.97
01:22:57.000 Just trying to get a show on the air. 0.96
01:23:00.000 And then 20 years later, what was the name of the...
01:23:03.000 Like, no one remembers...
01:23:06.000 Like, what is so important to us today, you know what I mean? 0.93
01:23:09.000 It's like they got this Jordan doc coming back on again, so people are like, oh shit, Jordan was... 0.68
01:23:16.000 This is a new Jordan documentary, right? 0.97
01:23:18.000 Yeah, it's on ESPN. Yeah, ESPN followed him for...
01:23:21.000 Jordan said, you're not going to like me after this.
01:23:23.000 Yeah, yeah. 0.99
01:23:25.000 He didn't give a fuck. 0.99
01:23:26.000 He's like, that's who I was. 0.99
01:23:27.000 That's how you win.
01:23:28.000 That's how you win six.
01:23:29.000 Yeah.
01:23:31.000 Well, I've always said that greatness and madness are next door neighbors.
01:23:36.000 Yeah.
01:23:36.000 And they borrow each other's sugar.
01:23:38.000 That's my saying.
01:23:40.000 Put that on a t-shirt, man.
01:23:42.000 That's true.
01:23:43.000 Every great person I've ever met is mad.
01:23:45.000 They're mad. 1.00
01:23:46.000 Because in order to get to that place further than anybody goes, you've got to be out of your fucking mind. 0.99
01:23:51.000 And you have to have a drive inside you that's different. 0.99
01:23:54.000 You've got to be able to sacrifice relationships and public perception and...
01:23:59.000 And even your own well-being.
01:24:01.000 Yes.
01:24:02.000 There's people that get to those points.
01:24:05.000 Those people are just, they're not, and maybe it's not a good idea to get to those points, because you only live in those points for 10 years, right?
01:24:11.000 Right.
01:24:11.000 And then after that, you've got to live with yourself.
01:24:13.000 Yes.
01:24:14.000 And it's hard for a lot of people to heal.
01:24:16.000 You know who's healed?
01:24:16.000 Who?
01:24:17.000 Mike Tyson.
01:24:17.000 Yes, I love him.
01:24:18.000 Love him.
01:24:19.000 Love him.
01:24:20.000 You know how he's healed?
01:24:21.000 How?
01:24:21.000 Marijuana.
01:24:22.000 Seriously?
01:24:23.000 Yeah, you want to smoke some Mike Tyson weave right now? 0.99
01:24:24.000 Yeah.
01:24:25.000 All right, hold on. 1.00
01:24:26.000 You bullshit. 1.00
01:24:29.000 I got a one-of-a-kind Mike Tyson weed box. 1.00
01:24:32.000 Man, my kids are going to be like, Daddy, why are you so happy right now?
01:24:38.000 Daddy is tripping.
01:24:41.000 Mike Tyson?
01:24:44.000 Yeah, that dude is amazing.
01:24:51.000 Give us that cool gold box over there.
01:24:53.000 I don't know if you can see it in the corner.
01:24:54.000 Since this is the coronavirus, we'll both get our own joint.
01:24:57.000 Thank you, man.
01:24:58.000 Otherwise, we would share a joint.
01:24:59.000 We would share a joint.
01:25:00.000 Even though you tested positive, it seems like a bad...
01:25:03.000 I tested negative.
01:25:04.000 I mean, excuse me.
01:25:05.000 I mean, in a good way, positive.
01:25:07.000 Sorry.
01:25:08.000 You tested negative.
01:25:09.000 I'm sorry.
01:25:10.000 I meant...
01:25:11.000 Like she's behind Joe, like...
01:25:13.000 I mean, even though you're good, it seems like in poor form to share a joint.
01:25:19.000 Oh, it's nice. 0.99
01:25:22.000 Damn. 0.99
01:25:23.000 Smells good. 0.99
01:25:26.000 What happened to this lighter, Jamie?
01:25:28.000 You been here firing up joints from behind my back?
01:25:32.000 Thank you, sir.
01:25:39.000 But Mike Tyson was...
01:25:41.000 In his prime, the ultimate destroyer and the ultimate guy who was completely focused only on greatness.
01:25:49.000 But then after a while...
01:25:53.000 After his career was over and he had to settle in and realize who he was, now he doesn't even like working out.
01:25:59.000 What he said to me was that, he goes, I don't want to feed my ego.
01:26:04.000 He goes, if I start working out again, I'll start feeding my ego. 1.00
01:26:08.000 That's self-awareness like a motherfucker. 0.99
01:26:10.000 That's why I don't have a six-pack. 1.00
01:26:13.000 For real. 1.00
01:26:13.000 I'll be a fucker. 1.00
01:26:14.000 Don't give up your joke, but that joke that you do is brilliant. 0.99
01:26:18.000 It's one of my favorite jokes.
01:26:20.000 Thank you, man.
01:26:21.000 Yeah, man, I don't...
01:26:23.000 That six-pack joke is genius.
01:26:25.000 Thank you, man. 1.00
01:26:25.000 I think I'm gonna release that shit. 1.00
01:26:27.000 We gotta do something, Owen. 0.99
01:26:29.000 We gotta let people know.
01:26:30.000 I mean, I've been telling people as much as I can, you're one of the best comics alive.
01:26:34.000 Thank you.
01:26:34.000 That's a fact.
01:26:35.000 Thank you, man.
01:26:36.000 I gotta tell you, man.
01:26:37.000 Notebooks came out really good, Joe. 1.00
01:26:39.000 I worked my ass off on that shit. 1.00
01:26:41.000 You'd have been laughing at me. 0.99
01:26:43.000 I did stop-motion photography, so like the graphics when you see...
01:26:47.000 I wanted to do like this paper crumpling and uncrumpling to show like, you know, names and all that stuff.
01:26:54.000 So I, while my kids and wife were asleep, I set up stop-motion photography and crumpled the paper.
01:26:59.000 Oh, wow.
01:27:00.000 You did it all yourself?
01:27:01.000 All myself, put it in.
01:27:02.000 And then I had a hell of a direct, a hell of an editor, Matt Silfen.
01:27:06.000 Big shout out to my man Matt Silfen.
01:27:08.000 What are you using to set all that up?
01:27:10.000 I have a tripod that leans on because I like cooking. 0.93
01:27:16.000 I was going to do, like, food videos, but for my family to show them, like, shit that I'm making. 0.93
01:27:21.000 I don't want to be on the internet doing that. 0.96
01:27:23.000 Like, I just feel like...
01:27:25.000 But I do want to...
01:27:27.000 So when I make stuff for people, sometimes I go, well, how did you do that?
01:27:29.000 What did you make stuff?
01:27:30.000 I would challenge Donnell.
01:27:31.000 I would send him pictures and be like, food, beef, son.
01:27:33.000 Yeah, that's right.
01:27:34.000 He cooks a lot, too.
01:27:35.000 Yeah, he cooks a lot, too.
01:27:35.000 What kind of food do you cook?
01:27:36.000 I would do...
01:27:37.000 So I would do...
01:27:38.000 I went on this whole, like... 1.00
01:27:41.000 I would make shit. 0.99
01:27:43.000 My smoothies are incredible. 1.00
01:27:45.000 I would make my own almond milk and all that shit. 1.00
01:27:48.000 And people are like, how are you doing that shit? 1.00
01:27:50.000 So I would do that. 1.00
01:27:51.000 And then I would make my breakfast foods are crazy.
01:27:55.000 My wife loves how I put that together. 0.99
01:27:57.000 I make shit from scratch because I'm from scratch. 1.00
01:28:00.000 Like what kind of shit? 1.00
01:28:01.000 Waffles, pancakes, all that shit. 1.00
01:28:02.000 From scratch? 1.00
01:28:03.000 Yeah, I could tell you what goes in it right now.
01:28:05.000 I could look in your thing and be like, okay, you need.
01:28:07.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
01:28:08.000 I could hook that shit up. 1.00
01:28:10.000 Whatever, man. 1.00
01:28:10.000 Whatever. 1.00
01:28:11.000 And, you know, whatever it is. 0.99
01:28:13.000 But I'm big on plating and making it look good and shit, so... 0.99
01:28:17.000 You're like a chef in disguise. 0.99
01:28:19.000 I'm like a chef.
01:28:19.000 I'm a quiet chef.
01:28:20.000 Have you ever cooked any wild game?
01:28:22.000 Nah, man.
01:28:23.000 No?
01:28:24.000 But I just gotta see it once, and then I'll get so many ideas, because I guarantee you, I could take a recipe that you love and just even, like, heighten it. 0.95
01:28:32.000 You'd be like, damn, I didn't think of it that way. 0.75
01:28:34.000 Okay. 1.00
01:28:34.000 I love doing that shit. 1.00
01:28:35.000 And so I was gonna do... 1.00
01:28:37.000 Sometimes my wife would take a picture. 0.99
01:28:39.000 I'd take a picture and send it to my mom or something. 1.00
01:28:42.000 And my mom is competitive as fuck. 1.00
01:28:43.000 How'd you do that? 0.99
01:28:45.000 Did you put the thing on the thing?
01:28:47.000 And I'd get it from them.
01:28:49.000 They're foodies before it was foodies.
01:28:50.000 My Aunt Sissy could bite a piece of dessert and be like, they didn't use cinnamon. 1.00
01:28:56.000 She can taste that shit. 1.00
01:28:58.000 And I would watch. 1.00
01:28:59.000 I grew up watching that, so I liked doing it.
01:29:01.000 So basically, I bought a tripod.
01:29:04.000 But I was able to use that for the stop-motion photography.
01:29:08.000 So I did that for all the lower third titles and all of that stuff.
01:29:12.000 I had to realize that cooking is an art.
01:29:17.000 I had to change my perceptions and I didn't realize that I had a misconceived idea, a misperception.
01:29:24.000 I didn't understand that until I watched Anthony Bourdain's TV show, the first one, No Reservations.
01:29:30.000 And when I watched that show and his enthusiasm and passion for great chefs and great cuisine, and I think a lot of it also was like that he was enthusiastic about other people's work.
01:29:43.000 Yeah.
01:29:43.000 And then I was realizing like, okay, this guy is not just a chef himself, which he was, but also like...
01:29:50.000 A fan of the art form.
01:29:52.000 And so all the great masters, like he would go to their places all over the world and film with them and eat with them and cook with them and drink with them.
01:30:01.000 And then I realized like, oh, this is an art form that you don't...
01:30:08.000 It doesn't last very long and you eat it.
01:30:10.000 It's still an art form.
01:30:11.000 Yeah.
01:30:12.000 But it's an art form.
01:30:12.000 It's like drawing, right?
01:30:15.000 Like your son's three.
01:30:16.000 When your son draws...
01:30:18.000 Yes.
01:30:18.000 Like, it's cool to see someone draw something, but it's also different than, you know, whatever.
01:30:27.000 Leonardo da Vinci, you know, whatever.
01:30:29.000 Someone who's amazing at it.
01:30:31.000 Like, you go, oh, there's levels.
01:30:33.000 There's many, [...
01:30:36.000 Even to food.
01:30:37.000 There's, like, some food that's just, I'm hungry, I just need to eat.
01:30:40.000 Right.
01:30:40.000 But then...
01:30:42.000 I guess what happened was civilization got settled into the fact there was enough time between getting raided by barbarians and fighting off saber-toothed cats.
01:30:52.000 They're like, okay, okay, okay.
01:30:53.000 What if I make it pretty?
01:30:55.000 Like, what if I add a little bit of this?
01:30:57.000 It's everything, man. 0.99
01:30:58.000 And then they'll put in a little fucking balsamic drizzle on it. 0.99
01:31:02.000 Look at that! 0.99
01:31:03.000 A little sprig of parsley.
01:31:05.000 A little rosemary.
01:31:05.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:31:07.000 Look what you did!
01:31:08.000 And then they started turning what was like an essential thing into an art form.
01:31:13.000 An experience, yeah.
01:31:14.000 Well, because you eat with all five of your senses, right?
01:31:19.000 First, you hear it cooking, right?
01:31:22.000 Then you smell it. 0.99
01:31:23.000 You're like, oh shit, that's one thing, right? 1.00
01:31:26.000 Then you see it, and that's the whole plating of it, right? 0.99
01:31:31.000 What's the other two senses?
01:31:32.000 You taste it last.
01:31:34.000 Yeah.
01:31:35.000 See, hear it.
01:31:36.000 What's the other one?
01:31:37.000 Feel.
01:31:37.000 You touch it.
01:31:37.000 Feel it?
01:31:38.000 And you touch it.
01:31:38.000 Oh, sure.
01:31:39.000 Text it.
01:31:40.000 And you go.
01:31:40.000 And so it is.
01:31:42.000 It's a dance, man.
01:31:43.000 It's the whole.
01:31:44.000 And I love that.
01:31:45.000 I love that whole aspect of it.
01:31:46.000 And for a while, I had gotten into plant-based stuff.
01:31:53.000 To see...
01:31:53.000 And so it's like a fun thing when you can basically make versions of your old comfort foods.
01:31:59.000 I would be like, hey...
01:32:01.000 Or I would make stuff without a specific ingredient and do a substitute thing.
01:32:05.000 It tastes great or it looks great or whatever it is.
01:32:08.000 So that's the stuff that I was into, man.
01:32:11.000 But I also like...
01:32:16.000 My wife and I did joke about doing a site called Doctoring It Up. 0.94
01:32:20.000 We'll just take canned chili, but then slice it up. 0.99
01:32:26.000 So when you eat it, it's like, this shit could be a $25 bowl of chili now, you know what I mean? 0.99
01:32:32.000 Doctoring stuff up is my thing, too. 1.00
01:32:35.000 I could take a frozen pizza and do some shit to it. 0.98
01:32:39.000 You know what's cool to me, too, is that food is so specific to the culture. 0.99
01:32:46.000 I went to Thailand for the first time ever last year.
01:32:50.000 Oh, wow.
01:32:50.000 Yeah.
01:32:50.000 And, you know, we actually took a Thai cooking class at this one place, and so got to understand how they do things.
01:32:59.000 There's very little dairy.
01:33:01.000 Everything is like coconut milk and these different spices and curries and the way they cook.
01:33:06.000 And it's like, oh, this is so recognizable, as opposed to, like, Mexican food, which is so recognizable to Mexico.
01:33:13.000 The mole and the chorizo and all the different styles of creating Mexican food.
01:33:19.000 Yeah, well, for a while, I did raw food.
01:33:23.000 Raw?
01:33:24.000 What were you eating?
01:33:24.000 I did raw food.
01:33:25.000 It was fantastic.
01:33:26.000 It was the best shape I've ever felt in my life.
01:33:30.000 Just raw vegetables?
01:33:33.000 Did you eat raw meat?
01:33:34.000 No, I didn't do raw meat.
01:33:36.000 But I went down this deep dive.
01:33:38.000 I was learning how to make dishes.
01:33:41.000 And every meal has four things.
01:33:43.000 A fat, an acid, a salt, and a sweet.
01:33:46.000 So even if you don't eat raw food, I was just looking at plates.
01:33:48.000 So if you get calamari, right?
01:33:51.000 The fried, that's the fat.
01:33:52.000 You know what I mean?
01:33:53.000 And then the salt is obviously the salt and the batter and the salt you put on it.
01:33:56.000 The sweet is the dipping sauce.
01:33:58.000 But they always give you a lime wedge.
01:33:59.000 I was like, why do they do that?
01:34:01.000 And that's the acid part.
01:34:02.000 So every meal should have those four components and then you just learn like how you tease the tongue and stuff that you do to like stimulate the tongue and excite the tongue.
01:34:10.000 And so what I learned when I did the raw food thing is that I don't love barbecue potato chips.
01:34:16.000 I love the seasoning that's on the chips.
01:34:18.000 Of course, right?
01:34:19.000 So you can take anything, not anything, but you know what I mean, something chippy-esque, but if you can conjure up those same seasonings, I won't miss barbecue potatoes. 0.86
01:34:27.000 Bro, I will fuck up a bag of vinegar and salt and vinegar chips, sea salt and vinegar. 0.99
01:34:34.000 I will fuck those chips up. 1.00
01:34:36.000 Tom's got the best ones, I think. 1.00
01:34:37.000 I feel like I can't stop.
01:34:39.000 I'm in a trance.
01:34:41.000 I'm in a vinegar and salt eating trance.
01:34:44.000 I'm like barbecue savory.
01:34:45.000 But I would eat any chip.
01:34:47.000 But it's like the chip by itself.
01:34:49.000 That's where the sum is way greater than the sum of the parts.
01:34:54.000 The total.
01:34:55.000 Because salt by itself is okay.
01:34:57.000 Vinegar by itself, that's fine.
01:34:58.000 Chips by themselves.
01:35:00.000 Alright.
01:35:00.000 I'm hungry, I'll eat it.
01:35:02.000 All together, like, Jesus!
01:35:03.000 Where have you been all my life?
01:35:06.000 Right?
01:35:07.000 Like, what an impact.
01:35:08.000 What's up, Jamie?
01:35:08.000 I haven't seen you getting those salt and vinegar almonds.
01:35:10.000 Have you had those?
01:35:11.000 I'm scared.
01:35:12.000 I'm scared of these almonds.
01:35:13.000 I've been addicted to those for years.
01:35:14.000 These are my brands.
01:35:16.000 Srirachas. 0.80
01:35:17.000 Yeah, Blue Diamond. 1.00
01:35:18.000 I eat the shit out of these. 0.98
01:35:19.000 But I know there's all kinds of spices in here that I don't need. 0.99
01:35:22.000 Right.
01:35:23.000 Why am I eating this?
01:35:24.000 It's probably, look, I can't read this without my glasses on, but that list of ingredients, that's not just almonds. 1.00
01:35:33.000 Look at all that shit. 0.99
01:35:34.000 See if you can read that. 1.00
01:35:36.000 Look at all that shit. 1.00
01:35:37.000 There's too many. 1.00
01:35:37.000 Those are the sriracha almonds, which are goddamn delicious. 1.00
01:35:41.000 The first one that's a little weird would be corn maldextrin. 0.92
01:35:45.000 That's the first ingredient?
01:35:47.000 No, no, I mean the first one that's a little funny.
01:35:48.000 Oh.
01:35:49.000 It's the almonds, vegetable oil, sugar, salt, corn maldextrin.
01:35:52.000 Yeah, see, sugar is a high number. 0.97
01:35:54.000 That's not good either.
01:35:55.000 Yeah.
01:35:56.000 You're really better off raw almonds.
01:36:00.000 Yeah.
01:36:00.000 That's what you're really better off for.
01:36:02.000 That's what I make almond milk with.
01:36:03.000 It's not bad.
01:36:04.000 Raw almonds are dope.
01:36:05.000 A little bit of sugar, though.
01:36:06.000 How many grams of sugar does it say per serving?
01:36:08.000 Two grams of sugar.
01:36:08.000 How big is a serving, though?
01:36:10.000 Like, how many servings are in it?
01:36:12.000 Oh, yeah.
01:36:12.000 Why do they do servings like that?
01:36:13.000 It says 28 nuts is an ounce.
01:36:15.000 So that's six servings?
01:36:17.000 Well, I eat six servings then.
01:36:18.000 12 grams.
01:36:20.000 Because I eat six servings.
01:36:21.000 That's not bad.
01:36:22.000 How many teaspoons of sugar is?
01:36:24.000 It's a lot of calories too.
01:36:25.000 When you find out how many calories are in almonds, you're like, whoa.
01:36:28.000 Six grams of protein.
01:36:29.000 Yeah, it's good for you.
01:36:31.000 But you know what it's bad for? 1.00
01:36:32.000 The fucking environment. 0.99
01:36:35.000 If you care, if you care about the environment, you're not supposed to be growing a plant here that could never survive without being drowned. 1.00
01:36:41.000 That's what almonds are. 1.00
01:36:42.000 These motherfuckers just suck up all the water. 1.00
01:36:45.000 They're whores. 1.00
01:36:45.000 That's hilarious. 1.00
01:36:46.000 They're mean.
01:36:47.000 They kill all the other plants. 1.00
01:36:49.000 They're like, fuck you. 1.00
01:36:50.000 We're trying to make nuts. 1.00
01:36:51.000 Shut up. 0.99
01:36:51.000 I don't know. 0.99
01:36:52.000 I'm just kidding about that.
01:36:53.000 But they're drinking all the water. 1.00
01:36:54.000 They're greedy bitches. 1.00
01:36:55.000 Thirsty as hell. 1.00
01:36:57.000 Somebody pointed that out.
01:36:58.000 Like, if you really care about the environment, you wouldn't be buying avocados from other countries.
01:37:02.000 Oh, yeah.
01:37:03.000 Like, where's that avocado coming from?
01:37:05.000 How's it getting here?
01:37:06.000 By truck?
01:37:07.000 You're supposed to be eating what's around you. 1.00
01:37:10.000 And you're supposed to live where shit grows. 1.00
01:37:15.000 Remember Kenneth Smith? 1.00
01:37:17.000 It's the desert.
01:37:18.000 Oh, that's right, right.
01:37:21.000 We just drove here 500 miles with your food.
01:37:23.000 It occurred to us.
01:37:24.000 We didn't have world hunger if you people live where the food is.
01:37:28.000 Move! 0.97
01:37:30.000 We got deserts in America too! 1.00
01:37:32.000 We just don't live in them, asshole! 1.00
01:37:33.000 Dude, that line alone... 1.00
01:37:35.000 A lot of our food comes from California.
01:37:38.000 The farmland between here and San Francisco is crazy Republican.
01:37:45.000 Dude, you go up there, you see these anti-abortion billboards and pro-Trump billboards and oh my goodness.
01:37:54.000 It's like a different world.
01:37:55.000 It's so crazy because... 0.97
01:37:58.000 It's the world of the people who have to work from fucking dawn till 7pm and then they crash and they go back to the farm again. 0.97
01:38:06.000 They're always trying to keep it together. 1.00
01:38:08.000 Fuck, man. 1.00
01:38:09.000 When it comes to farmers, there's one thing you get a lot of. 1.00
01:38:12.000 You get a lot of religion.
01:38:14.000 This is not a value judgment.
01:38:16.000 But you get a lot of religion and you get a lot of Republicans.
01:38:19.000 You get a lot of that.
01:38:20.000 It's not that common that you get...
01:38:23.000 Liberal farmers.
01:38:24.000 There are a few.
01:38:26.000 There's certainly some organic farmers that are real progressive, liberal people that understand the importance of growing your own food.
01:38:32.000 But mass farmers, when farmers are growing corn to feed cows, those kind of farmers, there's nothing wrong with that.
01:38:39.000 They need them. 1.00
01:38:41.000 Those fuckers are... 1.00
01:38:42.000 A lot of those people are Republican. 1.00
01:38:44.000 You gotta wonder. 1.00
01:38:45.000 Maybe it's just the party of the people that really bust their ass. 1.00
01:38:49.000 And they want that. 1.00
01:38:52.000 That hard-working farmer ethic is like there's no room for bullshit in that life. 1.00
01:38:57.000 If you gotta get up at 6 o'clock in the morning and feed the chickens, milk the cows, and then do shit all day long and you're barely paying your bills, you don't wanna hear any bullshit. 1.00
01:39:07.000 You don't wanna hear any bullshit. 1.00
01:39:09.000 And so I think a lot of them Because Republicans stand for this no bullshit perspective on life. 0.99
01:39:16.000 They think the Democrats want to hand out their money and take too much of their taxes. 0.79
01:39:19.000 But it's because of their reality.
01:39:22.000 It's because of the reality of this particularly grueling occupation these people have taken on.
01:39:26.000 It's almost like a mistake of perspective.
01:39:29.000 They don't have an opportunity to see things openly, like see the whole world and see where their position is.
01:39:35.000 They have a uniquely difficult position.
01:39:37.000 They might think the whole world is like that, but it's not necessarily.
01:39:42.000 You just chose something that's a preposterous endeavor.
01:39:46.000 I mean that in an admirable way.
01:39:48.000 I'm admiring farmers' work ethic.
01:39:50.000 If you took a regular person, just you or me, who's never worked like that ever, and say, hey, Owen, you and Joe are going to get up at 5 o'clock in the morning.
01:39:59.000 You're going to feed the chickens and milk the cows and gather up the eggs. 0.99
01:40:03.000 You're going to work all fucking day, man. 0.98
01:40:07.000 And you're barely going to make any money. 0.98
01:40:08.000 And you're going to have crazy loans.
01:40:11.000 And you're going to need to be subsidized. 0.99
01:40:13.000 You're going to need to be subsidized by the goddamn government. 0.99
01:40:16.000 Sign me up. 1.00
01:40:17.000 No. 0.99
01:40:17.000 Oh man, so much depression and suicide and when their farms collapse, man, it's fucking devastating. 0.99
01:40:23.000 And there's some people who could do it too. 0.97
01:40:25.000 Some people would do it and they become very successful.
01:40:27.000 And there's some people who do it and love it and swear by it.
01:40:29.000 I mean, there's a whole spectrum.
01:40:30.000 But that has got to test you.
01:40:33.000 And if you think about how crazy that is...
01:40:36.000 That that's not more lucrative.
01:40:38.000 What is more valuable to us than our food?
01:40:42.000 And why do we treat them that way?
01:40:44.000 Exactly.
01:40:44.000 Well, it's like, what else is more valuable?
01:40:45.000 Our teachers.
01:40:47.000 Why do we treat them that way?
01:40:48.000 It's consistent.
01:40:49.000 You think about people who get paid so little who are so valuable.
01:40:52.000 Yes. 0.98
01:40:53.000 Fucked up society. 1.00
01:40:54.000 It's backwards, man. 1.00
01:40:55.000 What is more value?
01:40:57.000 Number one is stay alive.
01:40:59.000 That's number one.
01:41:00.000 How do you do that?
01:41:00.000 You need food.
01:41:01.000 Okay.
01:41:01.000 The people like food.
01:41:02.000 We should take so good care of them.
01:41:05.000 They should be the 1%. 1.00
01:41:06.000 They should be like priests.
01:41:08.000 Yes.
01:41:08.000 They should be taken care of.
01:41:09.000 The givers of fruit.
01:41:10.000 They literally bring you fruit and you give them paper and you get their fruit and it sustains you.
01:41:15.000 But they're struggling.
01:41:16.000 And then number two is teachers.
01:41:18.000 Yeah, because once you're here, you got to learn something.
01:41:20.000 But what do we do with our teachers? 0.99
01:41:21.000 We take them, we pay them dog shit, we stick them in front of 50 kids, barely paying attention, and you just hope to make an impact on... 0.98
01:41:30.000 Like, I'm sure you have a few teachers that said a thing at one point in time, and you're like, oh, okay. 0.99
01:41:36.000 Teachers do make a difference.
01:41:38.000 Yeah, Mr. Friedenberg, you'll never be able to draw a woman until you've had a woman. 1.00
01:41:44.000 Oh shit! 1.00
01:41:44.000 I was like, oh I gotta get me a woman. 1.00
01:41:47.000 Oh shit, that's a Bill Withers line. 0.99
01:41:49.000 You know, that sounds like a song. 1.00
01:41:51.000 Yeah, Mr. Friedenberg. 1.00
01:41:52.000 Goddamn. 0.99
01:41:53.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:41:53.000 I had one guy who was a Vietnam vet who was a heavy guy. 0.99
01:41:58.000 He was heavy.
01:41:59.000 And he was in middle school when I was in...
01:42:02.000 I was in the Mary Curley Middle School in Jamaica, Jamaica Plains, which is...
01:42:08.000 At the time, it was a real sketchy neighborhood outside of Boston, not a suburb of Boston, but inner city.
01:42:14.000 We moved there from Florida, and that was the only place we could afford when I was a kid.
01:42:19.000 And this was like 17-year-old kids in my 7th grade class. 0.87
01:42:24.000 It was so ridiculous. 0.96
01:42:26.000 I'm not exaggerating, man. 0.97
01:42:28.000 Wow.
01:42:29.000 Yeah, it was maybe 8th grade.
01:42:30.000 I forget, but...
01:42:31.000 There was this one teacher anyway, and he was a science teacher, and he would grow his own radishes.
01:42:36.000 And he kept saying, like, all I need is radishes and salt, and that's my lunch.
01:42:39.000 And I grew my lunch.
01:42:40.000 And I'm thinking, like, wow, this guy's out there growing his lunch, even out here in the city.
01:42:47.000 But this is the big thing he said to me.
01:42:49.000 He goes, you ever want to hurt your head?
01:42:50.000 He goes, just go outside and look up at space and realize how big it is.
01:42:56.000 Try to imagine something that has no end.
01:43:00.000 If you really want to hurt your brain, just try to imagine that space has no end. 0.99
01:43:06.000 That fucked me up, dude! 0.98
01:43:08.000 I was like 13! 0.70
01:43:10.000 And I was like, oh my god, he's right!
01:43:14.000 What?
01:43:14.000 There's no end!
01:43:15.000 And I swear to God, that became a big part of the shift in how I started viewing the world.
01:43:23.000 There's like two things that started happening when I was a kid.
01:43:25.000 One is that I moved around a lot, so I never had friends.
01:43:28.000 And because I never had friends, I had to form my own opinions on things.
01:43:31.000 I couldn't just adopt the opinions of the neighborhood.
01:43:33.000 I had to form my own opinions.
01:43:35.000 So I was always traveling to all these different places.
01:43:38.000 And then two was that teacher saying to me, That there's no end. 0.99
01:43:44.000 And I remember thinking that when I was a kid, like, holy shit. 0.99
01:43:48.000 And then the two conclusions that I had, one, there are no grownups. 0.99
01:43:51.000 It's not real.
01:43:52.000 Like, immediately I was realizing, like, I'm gonna one day...
01:43:55.000 Be one of them.
01:43:56.000 This is nonsense.
01:43:57.000 They don't know what...
01:43:58.000 Because you see enough, like, faulty behavior in adults.
01:44:02.000 You see enough alcoholism.
01:44:04.000 Like, I saw a lot of alcoholism and drug abuse when I was doing construction.
01:44:09.000 Oh.
01:44:10.000 My stepdad was an architect, and he got me gigs on jobs and construction sites.
01:44:16.000 That's what I would do for summer.
01:44:17.000 That's how I'd make money.
01:44:18.000 And you get to be friends with some of these guys, and some of them had real potential.
01:44:22.000 There was this one dude, he was a...
01:44:25.000 Drummer and a musician.
01:44:26.000 I think mostly just a drummer.
01:44:28.000 I think he played guitar too in a band and he was a Really funny guy. 0.99
01:44:33.000 His name is Robbie funny interesting guy, but he just struggled with the fucking booze in the bottle and I became friends with him when I was like 16 17 and he was in his 30s man And he couldn't get his shit together. 0.98
01:44:49.000 He would do good for a little stretch and then he would fall apart. 0.96
01:44:52.000 But I remember I liked him so much.
01:44:54.000 I was like, he's so funny. 0.98
01:44:55.000 And when he's got his shit together, he's just a fucking cool guy. 0.99
01:45:00.000 And then I would see him drunk. 0.99
01:45:02.000 And I remember thinking that when I was 17. Like, oh, this poor guy.
01:45:05.000 He's tripping on his own dick. 1.00
01:45:08.000 He's just fucking his way through. 1.00
01:45:10.000 But it was like, for me it was important to realize that you could be a guy who is like a funny, nice guy that I really like, but also do the dumbest things possible and derail your life. 0.99
01:45:21.000 So I was thinking like, what is missing in this guy that he's doing this?
01:45:27.000 Like, why do people keep doing that?
01:45:29.000 Particularly with things that are just undeniably devastating, like hard drugs and Things along those lines where you literally could die every night and you're still shooting up.
01:45:39.000 Like, what keeps you doing that?
01:45:41.000 And it's like a lack of structure for a lot of them.
01:45:43.000 Oh, wow.
01:45:45.000 I was thinking that when I was, like, a lot of them are adrift.
01:45:48.000 And some of them, it's a chemical thing.
01:45:50.000 Some of them, for sure, addiction is they're more inclined chemically.
01:45:53.000 But it seemed like some of them was just like a lack of structure and discipline.
01:45:57.000 And if they just had rules, Here's rule number one. 1.00
01:46:00.000 You don't shoot heroin into your dick because you're a Smith. 1.00
01:46:05.000 Smiths don't shoot heroin into their dicks. 1.00
01:46:07.000 Okay? 0.99
01:46:07.000 All right. 0.99
01:46:08.000 Gather it up.
01:46:09.000 But some people, they grew up with parents that didn't lay down any rules, man.
01:46:13.000 And they never developed a line.
01:46:16.000 They can't be that farmer. 1.00
01:46:18.000 Those fucking farmers that get up at 6 a.m., those no bullshit motherfuckers that work hard every day. 1.00
01:46:25.000 Every day. 1.00
01:46:26.000 And then there's people that just barely show up.
01:46:28.000 I'm sick today.
01:46:29.000 I can't make it in.
01:46:30.000 I didn't think of it that way, but that's so true.
01:46:32.000 They don't have anything hanging over their head.
01:46:35.000 You know?
01:46:36.000 Especially when you're young.
01:46:37.000 Billy Gardell used to say, when you're single, you're a Democrat.
01:46:41.000 No, no, no, no.
01:46:43.000 When you're single, you get a house, you're Republican.
01:46:46.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:46:47.000 Once you own some shit, you're going to want to keep it. 0.99
01:46:51.000 Yeah, that's sort of true. 0.99
01:46:53.000 But that's not always.
01:46:54.000 I mean, I'm not a Republican.
01:46:57.000 I consider myself left on almost every issue.
01:47:01.000 Except for maybe the Second Amendment.
01:47:03.000 And this is one where I saw people falter.
01:47:06.000 I saw a lot of my liberal friends fall apart.
01:47:09.000 What happened?
01:47:10.000 Wanted to come to JoJo.
01:47:11.000 How do I get a gun? 1.00
01:47:13.000 Oh, when this shit went down? 1.00
01:47:15.000 Jo, listen. 1.00
01:47:16.000 I know we've disagreed.
01:47:17.000 I got so many texts and calls.
01:47:18.000 It wasn't that we disagreed even.
01:47:20.000 It said one friend, his wife would never let him have a gun.
01:47:23.000 And the moment this went down, she goes, you have to get a gun.
01:47:25.000 She said to him, you have to get a gun.
01:47:26.000 That's hilarious!
01:47:27.000 She turned 180 degrees.
01:47:29.000 And this is what I've always been saying.
01:47:32.000 People can go dark on you, man.
01:47:34.000 The world can get evil when scarcity becomes a thing.
01:47:38.000 I mean, there's a reason why there's so many apocalyptic movies and it never works out great.
01:47:42.000 You know, all these Mad Max movies.
01:47:44.000 It's not like, that would be way better.
01:47:47.000 If we just lived off coconuts and fish we speared, yeah, it would be.
01:47:51.000 It's a great idea in theory, but what if you break your leg?
01:47:54.000 You want to dive in infection on the beach?
01:47:56.000 So how many people hit you up asking?
01:47:58.000 A lot, a lot.
01:47:59.000 Like almost, probably a dozen, close to it.
01:48:01.000 Did you help them?
01:48:03.000 I would say genuinely at least seven or eight.
01:48:06.000 It was two, no.
01:48:07.000 I said, listen, you're going to go down a road, man.
01:48:10.000 I'm not going to help you get a gun.
01:48:12.000 You've got to go to a gun store.
01:48:13.000 There's a giant line. 1.00
01:48:14.000 Yeah, wait in line, bitch. 1.00
01:48:15.000 Go read. 1.00
01:48:16.000 Read online how to get a gun.
01:48:18.000 I'm not supporting your panic buying of firearms.
01:48:24.000 You've got to learn how to use it, too.
01:48:25.000 That's the other thing.
01:48:27.000 You don't have to learn how to use a gun.
01:48:29.000 I've taken several lessons, many lessons now.
01:48:33.000 You have to learn how to use a gun correctly.
01:48:36.000 You have to learn how to load it.
01:48:38.000 Yeah, I've had rifle lessons.
01:48:40.000 I've had pistol lessons.
01:48:42.000 It's a very dangerous thing to just have around if you don't have any experience with it.
01:48:48.000 It's tricky.
01:48:49.000 But the inclination to get one is what I've been telling people about all along.
01:48:55.000 You think the world is safer than it is.
01:48:57.000 Mm-hmm.
01:48:59.000 The world's not that safe, it's just safe right now.
01:49:01.000 We hit a real good spot, man.
01:49:03.000 You and I were born in an amazing time.
01:49:06.000 Oh no, could you imagine?
01:49:07.000 We're born in a time where people are getting it together, right?
01:49:10.000 We're not together all the way, but we're getting it together.
01:49:14.000 Yeah, we're getting it together.
01:49:15.000 So in a sense, one of the things you were saying earlier about wanting a woman of color to be vice president, here's what that would indicate, and this is what I think one of the best things about the Obama presidency.
01:49:26.000 But this is what I said the best thing about the Obama presidency. 1.00
01:49:28.000 Let everybody know, okay, well this racism is all bullshit. 1.00
01:49:31.000 Because here's a guy who made it to the fucking White House. 1.00
01:49:35.000 And this is a guy who's articulate, and he's brilliant, and he's a perfect statesman. 0.99
01:49:40.000 Whether or not you like his policies or not, that's a great representative of who we can be.
01:49:44.000 So drop it.
01:49:46.000 There's no inferior race.
01:49:47.000 It's just people who have an opportunity, people who don't, and cultures, and where they develop in advance and what kind of environment they grow up in.
01:49:55.000 We're all one thing.
01:49:56.000 We're all one thing.
01:49:57.000 True.
01:49:58.000 But.
01:49:59.000 But.
01:50:00.000 Always.
01:50:01.000 But here's the but.
01:50:04.000 When one group decides to change the rules and keep moving the goalposts so they can keep whatever they have.
01:50:13.000 That's everybody in power.
01:50:14.000 That's what I'm saying.
01:50:15.000 Every culture has that.
01:50:17.000 But it's not every culture.
01:50:18.000 It's every job.
01:50:19.000 Everything.
01:50:19.000 Everything.
01:50:19.000 But in this country, it, you know...
01:50:25.000 Racism is not bullshit like this shit still exists. 1.00
01:50:28.000 No, I don't mean it's bullshit like it's not a real thing. 1.00
01:50:30.000 I mean it's bullshit like it's a dumb thing to still hold on to. 1.00
01:50:33.000 Okay, let's be clear. 1.00
01:50:35.000 No, no, no. 0.99
01:50:37.000 Thank you for being so calm and correcting me if I really thought that stupid. 0.99
01:50:41.000 No, I'm not saying that racism is bullshit. 0.99
01:50:43.000 I'm saying you can't defend it anymore. 0.98
01:50:46.000 There's nothing there.
01:50:48.000 There's nothing there.
01:50:49.000 If you just decide that an individual is in a category because of how much melanin or where they're from, that's crazy now.
01:50:58.000 Let me tell you something too, Joe.
01:51:00.000 No one has a stronger work ethic than a racist. 0.74
01:51:03.000 No one has a stronger work ethic than a Jamaican.
01:51:06.000 Jamaican's a legendary. 0.99
01:51:07.000 A Jamaican racist, man. 1.00
01:51:09.000 Listen to me, man. 0.99
01:51:11.000 No.
01:51:11.000 You know how hard these cats work to change the rules?
01:51:14.000 If they just did half of that the other way, everything would be beautiful.
01:51:19.000 Do you understand what I'm trying to tell you?
01:51:21.000 You know what's my favorite one?
01:51:22.000 What? 0.85
01:51:23.000 Lazy Mexican. 1.00
01:51:24.000 Do you know how goddamn crazy that is? 1.00
01:51:26.000 That's ridiculous! 0.99
01:51:27.000 They're the hardest working people ever! 0.99
01:51:30.000 You see Mexicans out there picking strawberries for like 13 cents an hour. 1.00
01:51:35.000 How much are they making?
01:51:36.000 What do they pay them?
01:51:38.000 There's so many undocumented workers.
01:51:40.000 How many people walk here from Mexico? 0.98
01:51:42.000 How many Mexicans working on farms and busting their ass doing the hardest jobs possible, waiting outside Home Depot to do anything you want them to do? 1.00
01:51:51.000 That's crazy. 1.00
01:51:53.000 That's a hilarious racist expression.
01:51:56.000 But the same thing before that. 0.81
01:51:58.000 The same thing happened to black folks, too, though.
01:51:59.000 Sure.
01:52:00.000 The slavery, and after slavery, they called us lazy.
01:52:02.000 And it's like, word.
01:52:04.000 Well, the darkest aspects have never been addressed from slavery is where you start from.
01:52:11.000 So if there's a community, and there's a community that has definitely been suppressed by racism, like...
01:52:21.000 There was a guy, what's his name?
01:52:25.000 The Baltimore police detective that we had on?
01:52:29.000 Michael Woods, that's right.
01:52:30.000 He was a detective in Baltimore, or a police officer in Baltimore.
01:52:35.000 Was he a detective?
01:52:36.000 I don't know.
01:52:37.000 He was a police officer.
01:52:38.000 Anyway, he found an old piece of paper that was a detail of the crime report, and it was all the exact same crimes from 1970-something.
01:52:48.000 As he was experiencing.
01:52:49.000 The exact same place.
01:52:50.000 Isn't that crazy?
01:52:51.000 The exact same crimes.
01:52:53.000 Wow. 1.00
01:52:54.000 And it was like, oh, shit. 1.00
01:52:56.000 And for him, it was just a relevation. 1.00
01:53:00.000 And then he found out about redlining, where you literally weren't allowed.
01:53:04.000 Who came up with that?
01:53:06.000 Like, seriously.
01:53:08.000 And to think of...
01:53:10.000 The work ethic it took to even, but who came up with that?
01:53:13.000 Well, people that were trying to suppress people that were freed from slavery, right?
01:53:17.000 So even, imagine, right? 0.99
01:53:19.000 Even if you weren't a slave owner, if you condoned slavery, if you were around in 1864, and you're like, I think it's a good thing, and then all of a sudden they let them out, and you're like, oh shit! 0.99
01:53:30.000 That's what happened. 0.97
01:53:31.000 And then they tried to suppress them.
01:53:33.000 But we're still experiencing that today.
01:53:36.000 Now, when people talk about reparations being a good idea or a bad idea, the most important thing would be to fix all the spots that we absolutely know were affected.
01:53:47.000 By slavery.
01:53:47.000 And there's not a small number of them.
01:53:49.000 There's a large number of them.
01:53:50.000 And these communities continue to be in a suppressed state, even though they are free.
01:53:55.000 They can go out.
01:53:56.000 Some of them do escape and they get great careers.
01:53:58.000 Some people do get out of bad neighborhoods.
01:54:00.000 But you're asking people to do a way more difficult thing than if you're growing up in Brentwood.
01:54:08.000 Most people talk about You know, slavery now, but nobody talks about the moment after slavery where they started doing the black codes. 0.91
01:54:17.000 Right.
01:54:18.000 So you're technically free.
01:54:20.000 Right.
01:54:21.000 But then they would make it illegal for you to hunt and fish for your own food.
01:54:28.000 And then you couldn't look for a job outside of your town.
01:54:32.000 It was like all these things that was basically...
01:54:35.000 And then it made loitering illegal, you know what I mean?
01:54:38.000 Because it's like, if we can get you to jail, then we can treat you like a slave again.
01:54:43.000 It was like this...
01:54:44.000 Could you imagine? 0.86
01:54:46.000 So you only had to work for one person still and still get paid shitty wages.
01:54:50.000 As opposed to going, I want to work wherever I want to work.
01:54:52.000 It's illegal.
01:54:53.000 Then I won't work.
01:54:54.000 I'll just throw my own food.
01:54:56.000 You can't do that.
01:54:57.000 And the federal government didn't make the states Deal with it. 0.99
01:55:03.000 I want to do a movie about that shit, but I don't know if anybody has seen it. 0.99
01:55:07.000 There's a hundred movies to be done. 0.99
01:55:08.000 You know, I got balls deep into Native American history a couple months back, and it freaked me out, man. 0.90
01:55:14.000 It's crazy, man. 0.98
01:55:15.000 I started off with this book that my friend Steve Rinello wrote on American Buffalo, and I read that, and a lot of it had to do with Native Americans hunting the buffalo, and then I read this book, Empire of the Summer Moon, that was on the Comanches, and a Holy shit. 0.98
01:55:31.000 And then I just started getting... 0.63
01:55:32.000 I read like at least five of them over...
01:55:36.000 Most of them I listened to.
01:55:37.000 What fascinated you the most?
01:55:39.000 What story stands out to you the most?
01:55:40.000 The Comanches. 1.00
01:55:41.000 Bro, they ran shit. 1.00
01:55:43.000 They ran shit all through Texas and Oklahoma. 1.00
01:55:46.000 They killed everybody. 1.00
01:55:47.000 This is how devious people were at the time.
01:55:49.000 They would give people giant chunks of land.
01:55:52.000 They'd say, you could have a giant chunk of land in Comanche country.
01:55:55.000 So they would give them this land.
01:55:57.000 They would go there and get slaughtered.
01:55:58.000 But They were trying to use them as human cannon fodder to slowly move the line of what America owned and push into Comanche country. 0.99
01:56:11.000 But it took hundreds of years.
01:56:14.000 The Comanches from like the 1600s to the 1800s were dominant.
01:56:19.000 They were so terrifying.
01:56:21.000 All they ate was buffalo. 1.00
01:56:23.000 They were wild motherfuckers who didn't hardly create any art. 1.00
01:56:27.000 They figured out horseback riding. 1.00
01:56:30.000 And they figured out horseback riding better than any of the other Native Americans.
01:56:34.000 And they figured out how to shoot arrows off their horses.
01:56:36.000 And they figured out how to raise horses.
01:56:38.000 So their whole thing was about giant packs of horses.
01:56:41.000 And they can conduct all of their fighting off these horses.
01:56:44.000 And the white dudes only had muskets back then. 0.79
01:56:47.000 They had one shot. 1.00
01:56:49.000 And then you had to fill that bitch up and it took forever. 1.00
01:56:51.000 And the Comanches figured out... 0.98
01:56:53.000 There's a dude named Lars Anderson who actually sort of recreated what they were able to do back then.
01:56:59.000 He's an archery guy.
01:57:00.000 And the Comanches would take arrows in between all their fingers. 1.00
01:57:04.000 And so as they were riding a horse chasing dudes down, all the white guys would get off the horses and aim and bang! 0.65
01:57:11.000 That's how they fired the rifles.
01:57:13.000 The Comanches would shoot from their horses with all their arrows stuck in their fingers. 1.00
01:57:18.000 They'd go one, two, three, four.
01:57:21.000 They could shoot like an arrow a half a second. 0.99
01:57:24.000 Crazy! 0.99
01:57:25.000 They would hang off the side of the horse and use the horse as a shield and shoot under its neck. 0.99
01:57:30.000 That's dope. 0.93
01:57:31.000 And they were ruthless, man.
01:57:34.000 Ruthless.
01:57:35.000 What they did to other Indians, what they did to white settlers, and it's all depicted in just dark, gory detail where you're like, oh my god! 0.93
01:57:48.000 But you've got to realize what was...
01:57:50.000 Imagine trying to survive back in Oklahoma in 1700. When you're just riding around your horse with...
01:58:00.000 You got sticks that have sharp rocks that you chipped at the end of them to go kill deer and buffalo and shit. 0.99
01:58:07.000 And that's what you need to make your baby stay alive. 1.00
01:58:10.000 And then you get raided by other Indians who want to fuck your woman and take all your shit. 1.00
01:58:13.000 Fuck! 1.00
01:58:15.000 Dude, I got so crazy about it. 1.00
01:58:17.000 I got so crazy about it.
01:58:19.000 I had to take a break for a while.
01:58:23.000 When I got that painting, that painting you saw in the hallway.
01:58:25.000 Yeah, that's fantastic.
01:58:26.000 This guy, Greg Overton, he's this master of Native American stuff.
01:58:31.000 I think that's a crow.
01:58:33.000 I actually didn't ask it, but somebody else told me.
01:58:35.000 Look at that. 1.00
01:58:36.000 This is how these fuckers do it. 1.00
01:58:38.000 This guy hanging, that guy looks like a Mongol. 1.00
01:58:41.000 Is he Native American?
01:58:43.000 It's off Daniel Belele's page.
01:58:45.000 Well, it might be Daniel Belele's page.
01:58:48.000 Also, the way all their stuff, their hats and their clothing and stuff looks more like Mongolian.
01:58:52.000 But the Mongols were famous for being able to do that. 0.97
01:58:55.000 And that was even before anything was recorded about the Native Americans.
01:58:59.000 How strong your corps had to be to be able to do that?
01:59:02.000 Well, their bows would take 160 pounds to pull.
01:59:08.000 What?
01:59:08.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:59:09.000 They were ridiculously strong people.
01:59:12.000 Ridiculously strong.
01:59:13.000 So you're saying it was like pulling 160 pounds? 0.69
01:59:16.000 160 pounds.
01:59:17.000 Yeah.
01:59:18.000 To give you an example, my bow that I shoot with is 82 pounds.
01:59:21.000 It's really hard to pull back.
01:59:23.000 Oh, shoot.
01:59:24.000 So it's like doing lat pull-downs.
01:59:25.000 Exactly.
01:59:26.000 It's really hard to pull.
01:59:29.000 But that is twice as powerful.
01:59:32.000 And mine's a compound bow, so it's on like these cans.
01:59:35.000 Right.
01:59:35.000 So as you pull it, it gets easier at the end.
01:59:37.000 Oh my God.
01:59:38.000 And it's easier to hold there.
01:59:39.000 That's hilarious, man.
01:59:40.000 I just had like, what if you made a sound every time you pulled your...
01:59:43.000 Because it's hard.
01:59:44.000 You're like...
01:59:45.000 If you did that, animals would run.
01:59:50.000 Gym noises.
01:59:52.000 Did you ever see that?
01:59:53.000 What is that one?
01:59:53.000 Is it Planet Fitness?
01:59:54.000 They don't let you make noises?
01:59:56.000 That's hilarious.
01:59:58.000 You can't make noises.
02:00:02.000 You can't make noises.
02:00:05.000 We got discrimination of all time.
02:00:07.000 They have meathead discrimination.
02:00:08.000 They discriminate against us meatheads. 0.73
02:00:10.000 Yes.
02:00:10.000 If I'm lifting, bro, I'm making noises.
02:00:13.000 Okay?
02:00:14.000 You can't handle that? 1.00
02:00:15.000 Maybe you shouldn't have opened a fucking gym. 1.00
02:00:18.000 This is what I do when I'm really trying to get something. 0.99
02:00:22.000 I make noises because I'm a man.
02:00:25.000 It says lunk alarm. 0.88
02:00:27.000 One who grunts, drops weights, or judges.
02:00:30.000 You mean a human.
02:00:32.000 You don't want humans.
02:00:34.000 You want people that are going to quit.
02:00:35.000 That's what they want.
02:00:36.000 They want people that are going to buy a membership, go there for a month.
02:00:39.000 And not show.
02:00:41.000 You don't want people that are dedicated.
02:00:44.000 Dedicated people grunt.
02:00:45.000 They grunt.
02:00:46.000 They drop weights.
02:00:47.000 Yeah, they feel it.
02:00:47.000 They also put pizza out on Fridays, I've heard.
02:00:49.000 Oh, do they?
02:00:50.000 At Planet Fitness?
02:00:51.000 Yeah.
02:00:51.000 They put pizza out.
02:00:53.000 Pizza!
02:00:53.000 That's why people go.
02:00:54.000 Is it like, what kind of pizza?
02:00:57.000 Like pizza.
02:00:58.000 Like pepperoni and cheese pizza.
02:00:59.000 Are you serious? 0.99
02:01:00.000 That's so ridiculous. 0.99
02:01:01.000 At a gym. 0.97
02:01:02.000 What is that plant-based crust that's actually supposed to be not flour?
02:01:07.000 Yeah, cauliflower.
02:01:07.000 I know how to make that.
02:01:08.000 I bet you do!
02:01:11.000 I actually make pizza crust from scratch.
02:01:13.000 It's fun, man. 0.99
02:01:14.000 Dude, it's a hilarious misunderstanding that you thought I was saying that racism is bullshit like it doesn't exist. 0.97
02:01:18.000 No, I just wanted to clarify. 0.98
02:01:20.000 I know, for sure.
02:01:20.000 But if I said that like that, God, that's going to be taken out of context.
02:01:24.000 I didn't think you...
02:01:25.000 Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
02:01:25.000 That's why I went back.
02:01:27.000 I didn't think that.
02:01:28.000 That's not what I meant at all.
02:01:29.000 Oh, that's hilarious.
02:01:30.000 No, I didn't think that.
02:01:31.000 I just think it's bad for everybody.
02:01:35.000 But it's also like...
02:01:36.000 It's a part of a pattern of human behavior that's bad.
02:01:39.000 And that pattern is lumping people into a category and not accepting the uniqueness of the individual.
02:01:49.000 Like as soon as you put someone in a category, like any kind of category you put people in, and you don't accept the uniqueness of the individual, you create the potential for some sort of tribal difference between each other that wouldn't ordinarily exist.
02:02:03.000 Like, if you start thinking of someone as, oh, this guy's from, yeah, this guy's from this place, or this guy's from that place, so I think of him in this way, or they do a this, so I think of him that way.
02:02:14.000 But I don't have a problem with any of that.
02:02:16.000 I have a problem when you go, because I think of you that way, you don't get to do this.
02:02:22.000 That's where it gets weird.
02:02:23.000 Oh, for sure.
02:02:24.000 It's like, think of me what you want, I don't care.
02:02:25.000 But when you just go...
02:02:28.000 What I was gonna say is that we still have certain aspects of certain cultures you can't deny.
02:02:37.000 Italians.
02:02:38.000 I'm mostly Italian. 1.00
02:02:40.000 And they are the most stereotypical fucking people alive. 1.00
02:02:45.000 East Coast Italians are exactly like the Sopranos. 1.00
02:02:49.000 There's just varying levels.
02:02:50.000 I want to see Cuomo right now though.
02:02:52.000 Cuomo is killing it fam.
02:02:54.000 He could be president.
02:02:55.000 He could be president.
02:02:56.000 See that's a guy who could be president.
02:02:57.000 That's a guy who exhibits all the leadership skills and understands that this is a terrible thing and sacrifices have to be made and there's mistakes that have been made and we're gonna have to correct those mistakes and do the right thing going forward and we're gonna have to figure out how to get through this.
02:03:11.000 And imagine being a guy who's a president or a mayor or a governor who's dealing with this right now.
02:03:19.000 As much as we shit on all of them, we have to respect that they're trying to help us. 0.97
02:03:26.000 I think they're trying to help us. 0.99
02:03:27.000 This is my perspective.
02:03:28.000 When I see whether or not I agree that we should be shut down for X amount of months, I don't know when we should reopen.
02:03:34.000 I'm not an expert. 0.99
02:03:35.000 I don't know jack shit. 0.97
02:03:42.000 Like seems like a leader and is on television and he's making the choice and he's making a choice based on wanting more people to be able to stay alive. 0.99
02:03:49.000 I'm all for that.
02:03:52.000 All those things are great for all of us.
02:03:55.000 But I just I hate the fact that there's Democrats and that there's Republicans.
02:04:00.000 I hate it.
02:04:01.000 I hate the fact that there's these groups because it just leaves open this like I had a friend, he's a really nice guy, and when we were on this, we worked together on the set, and he was so into Apple, so into Apple products, 0.99
02:04:17.000 he was talking about when the new Apple laptops comes out, you know, we're gonna shove it in Microsoft's face, and there was like all this team shit. 0.97
02:04:25.000 I was like, bro, you got team shit for the operating system of your computer. 0.99
02:04:31.000 That's how we are, man. 0.98
02:04:34.000 It doesn't have to be of something that's important.
02:04:37.000 Because politics are important, right?
02:04:39.000 The way we treat each other is important.
02:04:41.000 Policy is important.
02:04:42.000 The standards of how we accept the leader of this great nation, the way he communicates, all that stuff is important, right?
02:04:51.000 That is real.
02:04:52.000 But it's also... 0.99
02:04:57.000 To break it down into two sides is so dumb. 0.98
02:05:00.000 It opens up the possibility for tribalism. 0.99
02:05:04.000 Oh, definitely. 0.99
02:05:04.000 The same thing is like fucking iPhone versus Android. 0.99
02:05:07.000 People already stab each other. 0.99
02:05:09.000 Yeah.
02:05:09.000 At my son's school, they won't let you wear superhero stuff because it can create clicks.
02:05:15.000 Because if you're like, I'm Spider-Man people, I'm Batman people, then you can create that.
02:05:19.000 DC vs. 0.85
02:05:20.000 Marvel.
02:05:20.000 When I was a comic book head, it was all about Marvel Comics vs.
02:05:24.000 DC. I was a Marvel guy.
02:05:25.000 My friends were DC guys. 1.00
02:05:26.000 And they were fucking losers. 1.00
02:05:28.000 You're a loser if you like DC. But that's just a natural part of human beings. 1.00
02:05:35.000 We have to recognize all of that, we'll still be like, you wear glasses, I don't wear glasses. 0.98
02:05:40.000 Yeah, it's also, I'm from Jersey, I'm from Boston, you know, all that shit. 0.98
02:05:44.000 It's like, come on. 0.98
02:05:45.000 It's human nature.
02:05:46.000 It might be cute, but to hang on to it, if you get some benefit out of it, if you're proud to be from Brooklyn, that's great.
02:05:54.000 But you're just a person.
02:05:55.000 And this is the only way to look at each other.
02:05:58.000 The only way to look at each other is based on the individual.
02:06:02.000 And it's just hard to do.
02:06:04.000 It's natural to separate people by political biases, by what part of the country they're from.
02:06:09.000 It's natural.
02:06:10.000 But we don't have to do it anymore.
02:06:13.000 We don't have to.
02:06:14.000 It's a trap.
02:06:15.000 It's a trap that robs you of your perspective. 1.00
02:06:18.000 And it lumps you in with a bunch of other assholes. 1.00
02:06:23.000 There's some women that are all girl powered out. 1.00
02:06:26.000 Listen, there's a lot of girls that are amazing, but there's a lot of girls that you don't want them on your team. 1.00
02:06:32.000 They do bad shit. 0.99
02:06:34.000 You don't want Casey Anthony on your team. 1.00
02:06:36.000 Let's just stop this all girl, all boy shit. 1.00
02:06:38.000 Let's stop all left, all right. 1.00
02:06:40.000 It's all Fucking nonsense, and we haven't figured it out yet for some reason. 0.99
02:06:45.000 We're still dependent upon two parties. 0.99
02:06:48.000 We're still dependent upon two philosophies, conservative or liberal, different parts of the country.
02:06:54.000 Oh, these are red states, like, oh Christ!
02:06:58.000 Oh yeah, the coloring of states.
02:07:00.000 Has that always been a thing?
02:07:01.000 It's a trap!
02:07:02.000 When did that start?
02:07:03.000 I don't remember red states and blue states when I was a kid. 1.00
02:07:05.000 It's a fucking trap. 1.00
02:07:07.000 It's all a trap. 1.00
02:07:08.000 It's a trap.
02:07:08.000 So what's the alternative though?
02:07:10.000 I don't know. 1.00
02:07:10.000 I'm a moron, bro. 1.00
02:07:11.000 So that's the thing. 1.00
02:07:12.000 Whenever I hear people say, everything is there, what are we supposed to do?
02:07:17.000 So what's the alternative?
02:07:19.000 I think multiple parties.
02:07:21.000 I believe Holland. 0.99
02:07:22.000 Doesn't Holland have like seven political parties or some shit? 0.97
02:07:27.000 Why is that working out? 0.98
02:07:30.000 Well, they have legal weed, or they tolerated weed long before us.
02:07:34.000 You used to be able to buy mushrooms at cafes. 1.00
02:07:36.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
02:07:37.000 Why'd they stop? 1.00
02:07:38.000 I think people start tripping too hard.
02:07:40.000 I did mushrooms one time.
02:07:42.000 One time? 0.99
02:07:42.000 I shit on this dude's couch. 0.99
02:07:45.000 Did you tell me this story? 1.00
02:07:46.000 I think I told you last night, yeah.
02:07:48.000 All white couch.
02:07:49.000 This is crazy.
02:07:50.000 I should have said his name, but I ain't gonna give him that platform.
02:07:53.000 That's a rough, rough moment.
02:07:54.000 That's a rough moment.
02:07:56.000 That's crazy.
02:07:57.000 If he sees it, he'd be pissed, though. 0.99
02:08:00.000 He's fucking laughing. 0.99
02:08:01.000 But that's another example of like, what do you do? 0.99
02:08:06.000 Because people are so...
02:08:10.000 That's my only question.
02:08:12.000 Like when atheists say you shouldn't believe in God.
02:08:14.000 I don't believe in that either.
02:08:16.000 I don't think they're right.
02:08:17.000 What's the alternative?
02:08:18.000 And like, you can't...
02:08:20.000 Yeah, no, you're right.
02:08:21.000 You can't tell people what to believe in.
02:08:25.000 The thing about atheism versus religion is like, what is the overall benefit?
02:08:32.000 If you get an overall benefit out of believing in a higher power and it forces you to act in a more harmonious way, so you sure that's not good?
02:08:42.000 Because there's a lot of religious people that because of those religious principles, they live very ethical and moral lives.
02:08:48.000 So is it an overall net benefit for them to be involved in a religion?
02:08:53.000 It seems like there's an argument that it could be.
02:08:56.000 But then is there also an argument for being objective about some of those stories that seem crazy, like guys coming back from the dead and walking on water?
02:09:04.000 Yeah, when I went to Notre Dame, we all had to take theology class.
02:09:09.000 We had a nun.
02:09:11.000 Who told us that everything in the Bible is a symbol.
02:09:14.000 It was a symbol.
02:09:15.000 So if someone is old, they're just saying that no one lived to be 800. That just means what they have to say is important.
02:09:21.000 Oh, right, right, right.
02:09:22.000 Like 72 virgins.
02:09:23.000 Do you know that idea of when you blow yourself up, you get 72 virgins? 0.98
02:09:27.000 Yeah, I know that idea.
02:09:28.000 It doesn't really mean...
02:09:29.000 It's a symbol.
02:09:30.000 Yeah, it means like a million virgins.
02:09:31.000 It's like, I'm saying, I get a hundred million billion.
02:09:34.000 It's a symbol.
02:09:35.000 Yeah, it's a lot.
02:09:35.000 It's saying that that's an important task for you to...
02:09:37.000 Yeah.
02:09:38.000 Yeah, an important belief for Tenet.
02:09:40.000 And...
02:09:41.000 That resonated.
02:09:42.000 I understood that.
02:09:44.000 So that's how I perceive it as far as, like, it's not a literal thing.
02:09:48.000 Which kind of makes it kind of cool, you know?
02:09:51.000 Just as an artistic choice.
02:09:53.000 Oh, because in no books, some people were upset that I would go to black and white and then go to color.
02:09:59.000 But the reason for doing that is...
02:10:01.000 Whenever we talked about the past, we would go to black and white.
02:10:04.000 And then whenever we talked about the present, we would come back together.
02:10:06.000 That's like a dream, right?
02:10:07.000 Yeah, it was like...
02:10:08.000 Like a dream state.
02:10:09.000 Yeah, and I thought it was like a cool choice.
02:10:11.000 Yes, exactly.
02:10:12.000 Exactly.
02:10:13.000 So I just made that choice.
02:10:14.000 And because initially I wanted it to all be in black and white.
02:10:17.000 But we just did it as a run-and-gun thing, so we weren't thinking about the lighting and making sure it was...
02:10:24.000 And so when we looked at the color footage, some of it was all over the place, too.
02:10:28.000 It was like, let's do the black and white for the past.
02:10:32.000 That's good, yeah.
02:10:33.000 Yeah, because color correction is also expensive, so it was like, let's try to keep the cost down as well.
02:10:39.000 So that was the choice.
02:10:40.000 So if you go back, smoke one, then watch it again, you'll see whenever we talk about anything in the past...
02:10:46.000 It's all black and white.
02:10:47.000 It's black and white and back in the color when it's present.
02:10:50.000 Dude, what's it going to be like going on stage when you haven't gone on stage in a month?
02:10:54.000 Oh my God, I was just thinking about that.
02:10:55.000 How weird is that going to be?
02:10:57.000 Everybody's going to seem like open micers.
02:10:58.000 What's the longest stretch you've ever gone without doing straight up?
02:11:01.000 I can't even. 0.99
02:11:02.000 That's a damn... 0.99
02:11:03.000 Oh, I know. 1.00
02:11:03.000 I can tell you. 1.00
02:11:04.000 Eight months.
02:11:05.000 But it was when it was really early.
02:11:06.000 I bombed so hard.
02:11:08.000 I was afraid.
02:11:09.000 Eight months.
02:11:10.000 Eight months, but it called me back, and I went back up.
02:11:12.000 Eight months is a good stretch.
02:11:13.000 I was 19. I was 19. And the next time I went on stage, I was 20. And I was funny again, and it was back in me.
02:11:18.000 Oh, good.
02:11:19.000 And that was my on again, off again for eight months.
02:11:23.000 But as a professional, the longest I've ever gone, I couldn't.
02:11:26.000 I would say...
02:11:27.000 I would be lying if I tried to think of, I don't know.
02:11:30.000 Those shows are gonna be lit. 0.99
02:11:33.000 Do you know how crazy the comic store is gonna be when this motherfucker opens up again? 0.99
02:11:37.000 Do you know how crazy it's gonna be? 0.99
02:11:39.000 It's gonna be crazy.
02:11:40.000 Woo! 0.99
02:11:40.000 Yo, last time I was on here, I broke my phone basically from the textowen.com joint. 0.99
02:11:46.000 Oh, I told you not to check that out. 0.99
02:11:48.000 Man, it was good shit though. 0.99
02:11:50.000 And so it still exists. 1.00
02:11:51.000 I talk to those people all the time.
02:11:53.000 And it's been great.
02:11:54.000 Beautiful.
02:11:55.000 Cass is like, yeah, it's pretty powerful.
02:11:57.000 One guy told me the other day he uses my clips to help the morale of his troops.
02:12:02.000 And it, like, floored me. 0.99
02:12:03.000 Like, I was like, oh, shit. 1.00
02:12:05.000 Yeah, man. 0.99
02:12:06.000 And I've been sending them, like, I sent them notebooks first.
02:12:08.000 And so they got to see it.
02:12:10.000 They got to see the trailer first.
02:12:11.000 And I was getting feedback and stuff.
02:12:13.000 It was cool.
02:12:13.000 People think it's a robot.
02:12:14.000 It's really me.
02:12:15.000 You go to text porn.com. 1.00
02:12:17.000 I be doing that shit, man. 1.00
02:12:18.000 I be talking to you. 0.99
02:12:20.000 That's nice.
02:12:21.000 But yeah, it was dope, man.
02:12:23.000 It worked out.
02:12:25.000 So thank you, man.
02:12:25.000 Beautiful.
02:12:26.000 My pleasure.
02:12:27.000 But I was going to set up some dates and then...
02:12:28.000 I know.
02:12:29.000 Yeah, well, we talked about...
02:12:30.000 I want to go with you.
02:12:31.000 Yeah, I want to go.
02:12:32.000 People will ask me, are you coming here with Joe?
02:12:34.000 Are you coming here?
02:12:34.000 I was like, I don't know.
02:12:35.000 Yeah, we're going to do some, hopefully, when we're allowed to.
02:12:38.000 I have a couple dates booked at the end of the year.
02:12:41.000 I don't even know if they're going to be able to do them.
02:12:43.000 I'm supposed to be at the Forum. 0.99
02:12:44.000 Oh, shit. 0.99
02:12:45.000 At November 1st. 1.00
02:12:46.000 Yeah.
02:12:47.000 I don't know.
02:12:47.000 I want to do that one with you.
02:12:48.000 I don't even know if it's real.
02:12:49.000 It's down the street. 0.99
02:12:50.000 But I think that the governor has said 2021 for concerts and shit. 0.99
02:12:53.000 That makes sense. 0.99
02:12:54.000 I don't know.
02:12:55.000 And then they say it might be like six, it might be people separated.
02:12:59.000 I'm going to be so mad if all you need is vitamin C. I know, right?
02:13:03.000 I'll be so mad if some doctor comes out like 10 years from now and it's like, if everybody took just 4,000 milligrams of vitamin C a day, that's all you need.
02:13:12.000 There's no viruses!
02:13:13.000 And you're good. 1.00
02:13:14.000 4,000 grams of vitamin C and don't be a dick. 0.99
02:13:17.000 I don't know what stops it. 0.98
02:13:19.000 What can strengthen your immune system and what can't?
02:13:22.000 Do you know?
02:13:23.000 Yeah.
02:13:23.000 Is that real?
02:13:24.000 Well, as an expert, I would say...
02:13:27.000 I don't know about your immune system, because that's kind of like your pelvis. 1.00
02:13:31.000 You can't strengthen that shit. 0.99
02:13:32.000 I don't think that's true, though. 1.00
02:13:34.000 Can you strengthen your pelvis?
02:13:35.000 Your immune system.
02:13:36.000 Oh, your immune system?
02:13:37.000 Oh, yeah, yeah.
02:13:38.000 Oh, yes.
02:13:39.000 I think you can strengthen it by...
02:13:40.000 You can strengthen your pelvis like the bones themselves?
02:13:43.000 I don't know, man. 0.99
02:13:44.000 You ever see those dudes do that fuck exercise? 1.00
02:13:46.000 Yeah, I see that shit all the time. 1.00
02:13:48.000 They motherfuckers be doing a fuck exercise. 1.00
02:13:50.000 Isn't that strengthening your pelvis? 1.00
02:13:53.000 Listen, if she's 150, yeah.
02:13:56.000 But if she's like 380, son, you mean like...
02:13:59.000 Oh, yeah, that's too big.
02:14:00.000 I can't do it.
02:14:01.000 She's got to give up sugar and carbs. 1.00
02:14:02.000 Right.
02:14:03.000 I think you can strengthen your immune system by what you put in your body.
02:14:07.000 Especially over 40. I think...
02:14:09.000 Like when I was doing raw food, I didn't get sick at all.
02:14:11.000 At all.
02:14:12.000 Why'd you stop?
02:14:14.000 Socially is tough.
02:14:16.000 Forgot being sick.
02:14:18.000 My boys were teasing me like, yo, it'll take you 48 hours to make a pancake, son.
02:14:22.000 I had a dehydrator.
02:14:24.000 I had a dehydrator.
02:14:25.000 I still have it.
02:14:26.000 I dehydrate fruit and stuff for my kids.
02:14:28.000 Did you have to, when you were doing that, did you have to in any way supplement your protein?
02:14:34.000 Were you eating pea protein?
02:14:35.000 No, because that's a myth.
02:14:36.000 That's the whole thing.
02:14:37.000 It's all in what you choose to believe about protein.
02:14:39.000 But they were like, you can get protein from greens.
02:14:42.000 You certainly can.
02:14:43.000 So...
02:14:45.000 No, you can get protein from it, you just don't get the same amount.
02:14:48.000 No.
02:14:48.000 And it's not as bioabsorbable.
02:14:49.000 Exactly.
02:14:50.000 But then there's a question of how much protein do you really need.
02:14:52.000 That's the big debate.
02:14:53.000 Yeah, that's the big debate.
02:14:54.000 Yeah, it's kind of like with bacon.
02:14:57.000 You remember when bacon was dying and then somebody came up with, make it like you have to have it on burgers.
02:15:03.000 And they did these campaigns.
02:15:04.000 Is that what they did?
02:15:05.000 Then bacon came out.
02:15:06.000 Well, people weren't really messing with it.
02:15:08.000 Yeah.
02:15:08.000 Well, people thought bacon was bad for you for a long time.
02:15:11.000 They thought those fats were bad for you. 1.00
02:15:13.000 And so the idea of having bacon is it's delicious, but it's going to kill you.
02:15:17.000 Are you going to have a heart attack choking on that piece of bacon?
02:15:19.000 Everybody thought that.
02:15:20.000 There was that Dr. Sean Baker guy, that carnivore MD guy.
02:15:25.000 He wrote something...
02:15:28.000 About a study.
02:15:30.000 There's something about a study that was released on people who don't eat meat and the correlation between mental disorders and anger issues and sadness.
02:15:41.000 There's some...
02:15:42.000 I don't know if...
02:15:43.000 I might have made part of that up.
02:15:44.000 But there's something about it.
02:15:46.000 Like people who just...
02:15:48.000 Who don't eat meat that have... 0.97
02:15:51.000 Some mental issues. 0.99
02:15:53.000 Come on, man. 0.95
02:15:54.000 That's what it said.
02:15:55.000 Well, people who don't eat meat, they always say, you take on...
02:15:59.000 Can you find that, Jamie?
02:16:00.000 The stress of the animal.
02:16:01.000 Bro, I'm just talking about science.
02:16:03.000 We're just talking about science here.
02:16:04.000 I don't know.
02:16:05.000 I'm a scientist.
02:16:06.000 Listen, what people eat and what people believe are very personal things, right?
02:16:10.000 Oh, yeah.
02:16:10.000 Food and religion.
02:16:11.000 Right, and politics.
02:16:12.000 You want to clear a room.
02:16:13.000 Yeah, right.
02:16:14.000 Isn't that crazy?
02:16:15.000 It didn't used to be.
02:16:16.000 The eat part is recent.
02:16:18.000 It's recent, right?
02:16:19.000 Everybody ate everything.
02:16:20.000 Vegan.
02:16:21.000 Up until like 30 years ago.
02:16:22.000 Everybody ate everything.
02:16:23.000 Yeah.
02:16:23.000 But that's because I believe we didn't have to.
02:16:27.000 We had a smaller population.
02:16:28.000 So to stretch it, you don't know.
02:16:30.000 Like the milk my mom drank is not the same milk that we're drinking.
02:16:34.000 Because you got to feed more people.
02:16:36.000 More people are drinking milk.
02:16:37.000 That's part of it for sure.
02:16:39.000 Another part of it is they want to make more money.
02:16:41.000 They want to be able to make more milk, be able to pump it out quicker.
02:16:44.000 Pump it out quicker.
02:16:45.000 Yeah.
02:16:46.000 Yeah, so it's...
02:16:47.000 I'm gonna tell you, man. 0.99
02:16:48.000 Plus, when I used to drive all over the country, I never saw two cows fucking. 1.00
02:16:53.000 Ever? 0.99
02:16:54.000 Always see cows. 1.00
02:16:55.000 Don't see them fucking. 1.00
02:16:56.000 And everybody eating. 1.00
02:16:57.000 I was like, that can't all be cow, man.
02:17:00.000 They not making enough. 1.00
02:17:01.000 These motherfuckers just be standing around. 1.00
02:17:03.000 You should be sitting on the most ridiculous silence. 1.00
02:17:06.000 Like, I drove by and never saw anybody fucking. 1.00
02:17:08.000 It's not real. 0.99
02:17:09.000 Not real.
02:17:09.000 The earth is flat.
02:17:10.000 That's not meat.
02:17:10.000 It looks flat to me.
02:17:11.000 Yes.
02:17:12.000 Meat and mental health.
02:17:13.000 A systemic review of abstentation, depression, anxiety, and related phobias.
02:17:20.000 So what's he saying?
02:17:21.000 Yeah.
02:17:21.000 Okay.
02:17:22.000 The majority of studies, especially of higher quality studies, show that those who avoided meat consumption had significantly higher rates or risk of depression, anxiety, and or self-harm behaviors.
02:17:32.000 There was mixed evidence for temporal relations, but study designs and a lack of rigor precluded inferences of casual relations.
02:17:42.000 Yeah.
02:17:43.000 One study does not support meat avoidance as a strategy to benefit psychological health.
02:17:48.000 Well, yeah, because you beat yourself up.
02:17:52.000 You do feel guilty. 0.99
02:17:54.000 If you live a whole life of eating meat, and then you try not to eat meat, and then you go, damn, I have some meat. 0.99
02:17:58.000 So then you go crazy? 0.99
02:17:59.000 No.
02:17:59.000 I don't know.
02:18:00.000 I don't understand the whole crazy part, but I get you feeling guilty.
02:18:03.000 It's tough, man.
02:18:04.000 It's tough to change your diet.
02:18:05.000 Yeah.
02:18:07.000 Eating that way is not supported.
02:18:09.000 It's starting to get more supported.
02:18:13.000 Eating raw, you mean?
02:18:14.000 Yeah.
02:18:15.000 That's not, nobody really says that, but...
02:18:17.000 Like eating vegan, you mean?
02:18:18.000 Yeah, vegan, the whole vegan industry, the Beyond Meat world, and it's not soy, it's made of pea protein, like all of that stuff is like, like they're stocking through the roof.
02:18:28.000 Yeah.
02:18:30.000 Yeah, the thing that freaks me out the most about the animal kingdom is not just that we are able to justify stuffing as many as we can into a warehouse and making them shit on top of each other and then eating them. 0.68
02:18:50.000 That's just one crazy thing about it.
02:18:53.000 The other crazy thing about it is what they do to each other.
02:18:55.000 Yeah.
02:18:56.000 Man, I'm obsessed with wildlife videos, like wildlife videos where animals are eating animals.
02:19:03.000 Every day I watch a cheetah.
02:19:06.000 Take out some kind of a gazelle or a crocodile.
02:19:10.000 Ate someone's dog.
02:19:11.000 I watched the other day in Australia.
02:19:13.000 The dog pulled up.
02:19:14.000 These people are screaming at the top of their lungs.
02:19:17.000 And the crocodile gets their dog, snap, and just drags them into the water. 0.99
02:19:21.000 And they are fucking screaming and crying. 1.00
02:19:23.000 I am fascinated by that shit. 1.00
02:19:26.000 What fascinates you about this? 1.00
02:19:27.000 Just all of it.
02:19:28.000 Just the hierarchy of... 0.99
02:19:29.000 Well, what we're doing is fucked up, for sure. 0.99
02:19:33.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:19:33.000 But what they're doing to each other is fucked up, too. 0.99
02:19:35.000 It's just a different kind of fucked up. 1.00
02:19:37.000 They're fucked up as instantaneous, right? 1.00
02:19:39.000 Right. 1.00
02:19:39.000 Like, they need an animal, they find it, they bite it with their face, they drag it into the water, they eat it and swallow it. 1.00
02:19:43.000 Right. 0.99
02:19:43.000 And that's their fucked up, and we just kind of accept that as a part of nature, right? 0.99
02:19:47.000 Our fucked up is weird. 1.00
02:19:49.000 Our fucked up is we've figured out metal and boxes, and we've figured out cages, and we've stuffed that chicken into this fucking little box and make him shit on the other chicken. 1.00
02:19:57.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:19:57.000 We figured it out. 1.00
02:19:58.000 We figured out how to do whatever the fuck we want. 0.99
02:20:00.000 If you want eggs for a dollar a dozen, that's what it's going to take in order for this company to make any fucking money. 0.99
02:20:06.000 So they just figured out how to do it. 0.98
02:20:10.000 You know, when I saw this video, it started really making sense to me.
02:20:14.000 I saw this video of baboons that were raising puppies.
02:20:19.000 Yeah, bro, it's crazy.
02:20:21.000 These baboons that steal these dogs and then keep these puppies. 1.00
02:20:25.000 They keep them nearby the camp because the puppies will bark whenever things are coming close.
02:20:29.000 So they feed them, they keep them nearby, and they basically have pets.
02:20:33.000 So these baboons... 1.00
02:20:34.000 There's a crazy video of these baboons just grabbing this puppy by.
02:20:37.000 It's like they're rough with them, you know?
02:20:39.000 They don't have any idea of compassion. 0.99
02:20:41.000 So they don't give a fuck. 1.00
02:20:42.000 They're banging this puppy off rocks and shit, dragging them behind them. 1.00
02:20:45.000 And then just set them... 1.00
02:20:46.000 The puppy's like trying to get away and just like, sit the fuck down. 0.98
02:20:48.000 And he gives him some food and the baboon's just hanging out with this puppy and then raises it and then uses these dogs that they stole to guard the perimeter. 0.99
02:21:00.000 What?
02:21:01.000 Yes.
02:21:02.000 Yeah, so animals do weird...
02:21:04.000 Like, why didn't it just eat the puppy?
02:21:05.000 Right?
02:21:06.000 No, because it wanted a pet. 1.00
02:21:08.000 Animals do weird shit, too. 0.99
02:21:10.000 Like, they're just a bunch of systems that are trying to compete against other systems. 0.99
02:21:15.000 Like, the deer system versus the mountain lion system. 0.99
02:21:18.000 The deer system is we just gotta keep fucking and keep moving. 0.99
02:21:22.000 Right, right. 1.00
02:21:23.000 Big things and if they fuck too much and there's too many of them and not enough of us, we're done! 1.00
02:21:28.000 We gotta just keep fucking and keep moving! 1.00
02:21:31.000 And the mountain lion system is every day I gotta kill a deer with my face. 1.00
02:21:35.000 Every day I gotta find one, I gotta sneak up and get close enough this fast ass thing with swords growing out of his head to grab him by the neck and drag him down into the woods. 1.00
02:21:46.000 These systems, they're all horrific outcomes. 0.96
02:21:49.000 Right?
02:21:50.000 Predator and prey systems.
02:21:52.000 All of them are horrific.
02:21:53.000 All of them.
02:21:54.000 Our horrific is just a new kind of horrific.
02:21:56.000 We also, like, outlive all of those other things, right?
02:22:00.000 Oh, we outlive the fuck out of them, so we know real guilt.
02:22:02.000 Yeah. 0.97
02:22:03.000 You kill someone when you're four, do you really even understand what you just did?
02:22:06.000 Right, and your life expectancy is seven.
02:22:08.000 Right.
02:22:08.000 Yeah.
02:22:09.000 Do you really understand?
02:22:10.000 A four-year-old lion has probably killed a million things.
02:22:13.000 Yeah.
02:22:13.000 I'm out in three years, guys.
02:22:16.000 Did you watch Tiger King?
02:22:17.000 Did you watch any of that?
02:22:18.000 My wife and I tried to watch it.
02:22:20.000 It's not what we... 1.00
02:22:21.000 We didn't give a fuck about that shit, man. 1.00
02:22:25.000 We heard, God dang it! 1.00
02:22:27.000 It was like, another time.
02:22:29.000 Not during the quarantine. 0.99
02:22:30.000 I need shit to be okay for me to like... 0.99
02:22:33.000 Enjoy it. 0.99
02:22:34.000 But it seemed hilarious because they opened up with the call saying that that lady, you're going to want to prosecute that lady. 1.00
02:22:43.000 I was like, all right, I'm in.
02:22:45.000 And then it just wore me out, man.
02:22:48.000 Way to wear you out.
02:22:49.000 Yeah, it wore me out.
02:22:50.000 So I think in happier times, I'd totally be all into that.
02:22:55.000 I'm serious.
02:22:56.000 It's in my queue.
02:22:57.000 I'm going back.
02:22:58.000 It's a good show for the apocalypse.
02:23:00.000 Yeah.
02:23:02.000 Because it represents the folly of human beings.
02:23:05.000 What we could be at our most preposterous. 0.99
02:23:08.000 A gay guy who raises tigers and marries straight guys. 1.00
02:23:13.000 They all do math and shoot guns. 0.99
02:23:15.000 One guy accidentally shoots himself in the head. 0.98
02:23:17.000 The other guy decides that he's not gay. 0.89
02:23:20.000 What?
02:23:20.000 What?
02:23:21.000 This is madness. 0.98
02:23:22.000 That is a wild ass show of real people. 0.78
02:23:25.000 And you really couldn't make something like that fake.
02:23:29.000 Maybe like the Coen brothers could do it.
02:23:32.000 You know, the old brother where art thou type deal.
02:23:35.000 They could kind of create somebody like Joe Exotic.
02:23:40.000 But it's almost like better because it's real.
02:23:44.000 It's real.
02:23:44.000 It's better.
02:23:45.000 Yeah.
02:23:46.000 It's better.
02:23:47.000 That couldn't happen.
02:23:48.000 Yeah. 0.98
02:23:48.000 And the other guy runs the sex cult. 0.98
02:23:50.000 And then Carol and her husband. 0.98
02:23:52.000 Her husband's dressed up with a rope around his neck.
02:23:54.000 He went missing.
02:23:55.000 I hear this guy went missing.
02:23:57.000 My first husband went missing.
02:23:59.000 No big deal.
02:24:01.000 I mean, she definitely didn't do it. 0.98
02:24:02.000 It's not like she feeds meat to cats every fucking day and he was worth millions. 0.98
02:24:05.000 Whatever, whatever. 0.96
02:24:08.000 I don't know where he is. 1.00
02:24:09.000 Carol fucking Baskin! 1.00
02:24:11.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:24:12.000 God damn, what a show. 1.00
02:24:15.000 Do you think you could marry somebody whose first husband went missing? 1.00
02:24:20.000 Oh my God.
02:24:21.000 Do you think you would sign up for that?
02:24:23.000 Well, the kind of guy that would be into that, there's some guys that would be into that.
02:24:27.000 They're similar to girls who get into serial killers. 1.00
02:24:30.000 Oh! 0.60
02:24:31.000 Right?
02:24:31.000 There's girls that are really, they email serial killers and they're in love with them and they want to marry them.
02:24:37.000 Oh, after they're caught.
02:24:38.000 Oh yeah, after they're caught.
02:24:39.000 I thought you were talking about like right when they were like, in their prime out there.
02:24:43.000 I think there's a weird...
02:24:45.000 Obsession with that?
02:24:46.000 It's a small percentage of the people.
02:24:48.000 I've...
02:24:49.000 I've got high and thought about this.
02:24:51.000 Yes.
02:24:51.000 I think it has to do...
02:24:53.000 I'm thinking about it for the first time now.
02:24:54.000 Would I? With back in the day, if you were a murderer, if you could befriend a murderer, you would be more protected.
02:25:05.000 Oh, that's interesting.
02:25:06.000 Yeah.
02:25:07.000 Because they've done it before.
02:25:09.000 They won't punk out if something...
02:25:11.000 Right.
02:25:11.000 If we need to survive, I'm with...
02:25:13.000 Well, that's what women are, I think, a lot of women are really terrified of, is if confronted with real adversity, how will their man hold up?
02:25:23.000 If you're a woman and you weigh 90 pounds and you have a husband that's twice your size, like literally a 180 pound human, that's normal.
02:25:33.000 That happens all the time. 1.00
02:25:34.000 But if he's a bitch and he folds, And you're, like, left there, like, oh my god, like, no one's gonna stop anything from happening to me or stop anything from saying rude things to me, and fuck, you're not protected. 0.99
02:25:47.000 And there's mean people out there, right? 1.00
02:25:49.000 If you're a woman, you stumble into some mean people that are saying rude, lurid shit to you, and no one's there to protect you, and you gotta walk back to your car and you're wondering, holy fuck. 1.00
02:26:00.000 You know what, that sounds like a fun game show. 1.00
02:26:03.000 Did you marry a bitch ass? 1.00
02:26:08.000 Unfortunately, we'd be causing a lot of divorces with that show. 1.00
02:26:13.000 There's dudes out there that don't even know that they're bitches. 1.00
02:26:17.000 Because they haven't really been tested. 0.99
02:26:19.000 They don't know.
02:26:20.000 That's true.
02:26:23.000 Most people believe they're going to do way better than they will.
02:26:26.000 Yeah!
02:26:27.000 In real times of struggle, I think most people believe they're going to do way better than they actually will.
02:26:33.000 Which takes me back to that boxing ring in the club.
02:26:36.000 Everybody thought they did.
02:26:37.000 But that's a different thing, right?
02:26:38.000 That's like a guy with technique.
02:26:40.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:26:40.000 If you got a guy with technique in front of you and you don't know how to box, you're fucked. 1.00
02:26:44.000 You got like a few seconds to get lucky as you charge and maybe you might clinch and throw a punch that connects and hurt him. 1.00
02:26:51.000 It's possible.
02:26:52.000 Maybe.
02:26:53.000 Maybe, but it's not very likely.
02:26:54.000 It's more likely you're going to get boxed up.
02:26:56.000 Yeah.
02:26:57.000 Yeah, and jujitsu is even worse.
02:26:59.000 In jujitsu, it's 100%.
02:27:01.000 Because there's no lucky shots.
02:27:04.000 You ever break a bone practicing?
02:27:08.000 Yeah, I broke my foot, my rib, my hand.
02:27:14.000 My nose was destroyed.
02:27:16.000 I broke my nose so many times that my nose was useless. 0.77
02:27:20.000 It was useless.
02:27:21.000 It didn't work.
02:27:22.000 I only had like one quarter of one nostril that was open and I had a nasally tone to me.
02:27:27.000 I didn't realize.
02:27:28.000 I was listening to it and watching an old Fear Factor once other than my horrifying choice of wardrobe and inescapable accent that I still had.
02:27:37.000 I was hearing how nasally my voice was because I couldn't breathe out of my nose.
02:27:41.000 It was useless.
02:27:43.000 Broke a rib.
02:27:44.000 I had two ACL surgeries.
02:27:47.000 Two ACL surgeries?
02:27:49.000 Yeah, I blew out both knees.
02:27:51.000 That's it though.
02:27:52.000 That's not too bad.
02:27:57.000 If you do jujitsu particularly, most people just accept the fact that there's a possibility of injury.
02:28:04.000 It's like it could happen.
02:28:06.000 You could go a year without getting injured.
02:28:08.000 It's not like going and taking a yoga class where you're probably pretty safe. 0.97
02:28:13.000 It's too much random wild shits happening while people are trying to kill each other. 0.63
02:28:17.000 He didn't ever tell you that part. 0.91
02:28:19.000 Because I was going to sign up for jiu-jitsu.
02:28:21.000 You'd be great at it.
02:28:22.000 Would I? Yeah, you're so big.
02:28:24.000 How tall are you?
02:28:24.000 6'5".
02:28:25.000 You have long-ass arms, dude. 0.99
02:28:27.000 You choke the fuck out of people. 0.99
02:28:28.000 All the leverage. 0.99
02:28:29.000 Yeah.
02:28:29.000 Yeah, the leverage from your arms and your legs.
02:28:32.000 It'd be so spectacular.
02:28:33.000 How would it transform me as a human being?
02:28:36.000 Oh, you would lose a lot of weight, and you would gain a shit ton of confidence.
02:28:39.000 You would just have to go about it very technically. 0.84
02:28:43.000 When I started, I was younger and dumber, and I went at it aggressively.
02:28:51.000 Like I went at other martial arts when I was younger. 0.89
02:28:54.000 I just wanted to do them as hard as I could, as fast as I could.
02:28:57.000 With jiu-jitsu, really, it's about technique.
02:28:59.000 And the more strength you have, one of the problems is you could substitute technique for that strength.
02:29:05.000 Like the best jiu-jitsu players, the guys to learn from the best, are the guys who are small humans.
02:29:10.000 They're smaller people.
02:29:11.000 Like Eddie Bravo is a smaller guy.
02:29:13.000 It's one of the reasons why he's such a great instructor.
02:29:15.000 Hoyler Gracie is another famous, super technical jiu-jitsu guy who's a smaller guy.
02:29:20.000 There's like a series of guys like that all over the country.
02:29:24.000 And Jeff Glover is another one.
02:29:25.000 These smaller guys, because they're smaller, they have to rely on this spectacular technique.
02:29:29.000 So you learn from them.
02:29:30.000 So you never really want to rely on your strength.
02:29:33.000 It'll stop you from getting better, in fact.
02:29:37.000 It'll stop you from achieving the right technical level.
02:29:41.000 So you just keep getting better and better at it. 0.84
02:29:43.000 And then when you get to a certain point, like if you're in a fight with a guy, like a wild fight, if a guy just knows how to throw a punch and he's fast and he's a strong guy, he might punch you and he might fuck you up. 0.96
02:29:54.000 It might happen. 0.92
02:29:55.000 It can happen.
02:29:55.000 Whenever you're throwing knuckles with people, especially in a chaotic environment, it's possible.
02:30:00.000 Here's what's not possible.
02:30:02.000 I don't care who you are. 0.99
02:30:03.000 If you don't know how to grapple at all, and someone like Hoist Gracie clinches you and drags you to the ground, you're a fucksville. 0.99
02:30:11.000 You're fucksville 100% of the times. 0.98
02:30:15.000 100. 1-0-0. 0.98
02:30:17.000 You're fucksville. 0.99
02:30:18.000 You're fucksville. 1.00
02:30:19.000 He's gonna choke you 100% of the times. 0.99
02:30:22.000 And he'll do that to people that know jujitsu.
02:30:25.000 So when you get to a point like a guy like Hicks and Gracie or my instructor John Jock Machado, he can do that to people that are experts in jujitsu.
02:30:33.000 So there's like so many levels.
02:30:37.000 It's a crazy thing to learn.
02:30:38.000 And you're built for it, man.
02:30:40.000 Being so tall and long.
02:30:42.000 Also, you're a smart dude who, like you say, you like economics.
02:30:45.000 He's like figuring, well, if this happens and that, that's the same.
02:30:48.000 Jiu-Jitsu is just like that.
02:30:50.000 Yeah.
02:30:51.000 Helsing Gracie was another famous Jiu-Jitsu practitioner.
02:30:54.000 He was asked to describe Jiu-Jitsu.
02:30:56.000 And he's like, I'm going to paraphrase this or I might fuck it up.
02:31:00.000 He said it was basically like, I move and then you move. 0.90
02:31:04.000 And then I move and then you move.
02:31:07.000 Forever.
02:31:08.000 Forever.
02:31:09.000 Yeah.
02:31:10.000 That was a description of Jiu Jitsu.
02:31:12.000 I'm like, oh my god!
02:31:13.000 So if you realize how good Helson is, that it becomes a terrifying expression. 1.00
02:31:19.000 Because it's like, eventually I'm going to get you, bitch. 1.00
02:31:22.000 Yes. 1.00
02:31:22.000 You're going to fuck up. 1.00
02:31:23.000 You're going to get tired. 1.00
02:31:24.000 You're going to be using too much strength and you're going to get exhausted.
02:31:27.000 Just like those boxers that were throwing punches and then they'd get tired and the other guy would piece them up.
02:31:32.000 But it's going to be even more horrific because you're never going to be able to accomplish anything.
02:31:35.000 You're just going to slowly wear out.
02:31:37.000 The guy's just going to keep attacking you and you keep pushing him off you and he's going to keep attacking you and you keep exploding and he's going to keep attacking you and eventually you're going to get tired.
02:31:47.000 And then he's just going to dominate you.
02:31:48.000 He's just going to control you.
02:31:50.000 You'd be great at it, dude.
02:31:52.000 It'd be good for you.
02:31:53.000 Yeah, it'd be really good for you.
02:31:54.000 Would I have to be in there with kids when I first started?
02:31:59.000 They're going to put you in the women and kids class. 1.00
02:32:01.000 Getting all jacked up.
02:32:04.000 Here's how strong Jiu-Jitsu is.
02:32:05.000 There was a woman named... 1.00
02:32:06.000 She still exists.
02:32:07.000 Her name is Felicia Oh.
02:32:08.000 She's a friend of mine.
02:32:09.000 She's a black belt from John Jock Machado's.
02:32:12.000 She's super technical.
02:32:13.000 And she weighs...
02:32:14.000 Felicia's very strong, but she weighs about maybe 135 pounds. 1.00
02:32:18.000 And there was a guy named Seymour Butts.
02:32:20.000 Seymour Butts was a porn star who had a TV show on Showtime.
02:32:24.000 And he had this idea, pretty bold of him, really.
02:32:28.000 He's brave to do this.
02:32:29.000 He just decided, I'm going to do like a jujitsu match.
02:32:34.000 Well, I've never taken jujitsu before, but I'm going to spar with a woman and see what happens. 1.00
02:32:38.000 And this girl just... 0.97
02:32:39.000 Fucked him up. 0.99
02:32:40.000 But she's elite, man. 0.99
02:32:43.000 She's really good.
02:32:44.000 She's really good.
02:32:45.000 Yeah, she teaches people. 0.96
02:32:47.000 She also works for the California State Athletic Commission, so I get to see her at UFC events oftentimes when they're in California.
02:32:52.000 She's awesome. 0.83
02:32:53.000 But she's super technical. 0.54
02:32:55.000 So this guy, he was doomed.
02:32:57.000 He just didn't know.
02:32:58.000 He was a guy.
02:32:59.000 He's in really good shape.
02:33:00.000 He's young and fit and pretty good body. 1.00
02:33:03.000 She's a bitch. 1.00
02:33:05.000 She's just choking him and leg locking him and I don't know what she did to him. 1.00
02:33:09.000 I don't remember how many times she tapped him or what she did it with, but it was like arm bars and triangles.
02:33:13.000 But again, that would happen to any man who didn't know anything and went with her.
02:33:18.000 So even though she's a woman, just the technical expertise, it overcomes strength. 0.98
02:33:25.000 It's...
02:33:26.000 So for a guy like you, who's a very cerebral person who likes these sort of puzzles and figures things out, it's one of the reasons why your comedy is so good.
02:33:35.000 You're excellent at like economy of words and setting things up in a mysterious way and then dropping punchlines in.
02:33:41.000 That's jujitsu.
02:33:43.000 They're similar.
02:33:44.000 I like that.
02:33:44.000 I think there's a lot of things like that in this life that are similar.
02:33:48.000 There's little things that you learn, like little ways to move around things that advance through these games and systems.
02:33:56.000 And you can apply that to all these other different things.
02:33:59.000 And you can apply it even to comedy.
02:34:00.000 Yeah, that's what I was just thinking.
02:34:02.000 We were talking about another approach.
02:34:06.000 But that's what I got from Notebooks too, just how everybody approaches.
02:34:10.000 We have the same goal to make somebody laugh, but we approach it differently.
02:34:14.000 That's something that's so enticing to me, like how everyone approaches the craft in their own way.
02:34:20.000 I was super awkward when I first started out because I didn't have any background really in anything performing arts related or even music.
02:34:28.000 So I was super awkward in how to present myself and how to dress and how to act.
02:34:35.000 Yeah, because people who have knowledge of that, they do have a different level of execution.
02:34:41.000 And I know people who can sing, they say things in a more memorable way.
02:34:47.000 You just remember it, but they're not technically trying to sing.
02:34:51.000 You remember their phrases or their hooks or whatever it is.
02:34:55.000 Because this is like a musicality to their performance.
02:34:59.000 You just, you know...
02:35:01.000 That's a thing you figure out, too, is that it's not just...
02:35:05.000 And this is something with podcasts, I think, as well.
02:35:07.000 It's not just the words.
02:35:09.000 There's something to how you say the words.
02:35:12.000 And some people are not good at that.
02:35:15.000 And you don't think of it as being an important part of the...
02:35:18.000 You kind of ignore it because you're concentrating on writing or you're concentrating on...
02:35:21.000 Whatever, your look.
02:35:23.000 But there's a thing in how you say the words that gets into people's brains better than if you're clunky.
02:35:32.000 And I've been clunky.
02:35:34.000 We've all been clunky.
02:35:36.000 When you listen to old recordings, there's moments where you're like, ugh!
02:35:39.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:35:40.000 It's a lot of times because you're trying to figure out the best way to do it on the spot in real life. 0.97
02:35:47.000 And that shit takes, especially with a complicated bit, it should take a long time to work out the details. 0.98
02:35:53.000 Yeah, especially with, yeah, especially, yeah, the more personal you are too. 1.00
02:35:57.000 Yeah.
02:35:58.000 But when you get it, it's nothing more magical than that.
02:36:00.000 That's the best.
02:36:02.000 When you get it.
02:36:02.000 I don't want to say this bit either.
02:36:04.000 Your bit about your son.
02:36:07.000 About naming your son.
02:36:08.000 Adopting a white kid. 0.96
02:36:10.000 The white baby bit. 1.00
02:36:12.000 It's one of those bits where you just go, God damn. 1.00
02:36:15.000 When someone builds a beautiful house, you just go, oh shit. 1.00
02:36:19.000 Look at that. 1.00
02:36:21.000 Wow.
02:36:22.000 I should put that out.
02:36:24.000 We gotta do something with it, man. 0.99
02:36:26.000 When everything gets rolling again, I think we all need to realize, like, hey, you can't wait for shit. 0.99
02:36:32.000 No. 0.99
02:36:32.000 Because this can happen. 0.99
02:36:34.000 Now that we know that this could happen, it doesn't even feel real.
02:36:36.000 Here we are.
02:36:37.000 We know it's real.
02:36:38.000 Right.
02:36:38.000 We know it's real.
02:36:39.000 We know you just got an antibody test.
02:36:41.000 We know we can't really go anywhere.
02:36:43.000 We can't go to restaurants.
02:36:44.000 Everything's closed.
02:36:44.000 No comedy.
02:36:45.000 We know it's real, but it still doesn't feel real.
02:36:47.000 It doesn't feel real.
02:36:48.000 That's how weird life is.
02:36:49.000 Yeah.
02:36:51.000 In the moment, baby!
02:36:52.000 You don't know what's next.
02:36:53.000 You don't know what's next.
02:36:54.000 In the moment.
02:36:55.000 In the moment.
02:36:56.000 Welcome to In the Moment with Owen and Joe.
02:36:58.000 Welcome.
02:36:59.000 We exist through funding, so please contact our website.
02:37:04.000 Fundings.
02:37:04.000 Into the moment.
02:37:05.000 Into the moment.
02:37:06.000 That's a style of radio that you would get.
02:37:10.000 When I was delivering newspapers, I would listen to All Things Considered.
02:37:14.000 I think it was All Things Considered.
02:37:15.000 Yeah.
02:37:15.000 I think it was something on NPR. Uh-huh.
02:37:17.000 And National Public Radio.
02:37:19.000 And they were so calm.
02:37:20.000 The way they would talk was so calm.
02:37:23.000 I don't know if it was All Things Considered.
02:37:25.000 I listened to that later.
02:37:26.000 I feel like that was way later.
02:37:27.000 But it was whatever those old school type of talk radio, progressive talk radio.
02:37:37.000 That's when I knew I was ready to get married when I liked listening to talk radio.
02:37:41.000 I was like, when I want to hear people talk, I'm ready for a wife, son.
02:37:45.000 Bro, nobody gets more riled up than white dudes who listen to conservative talk radio.
02:37:52.000 Those Michael Savage fans, those kind of guys.
02:37:55.000 Rush Limbaugh.
02:37:56.000 There's something about...
02:37:57.000 How did that happen?
02:37:59.000 Let's think about how that happened.
02:38:00.000 How did that one genre...
02:38:05.000 That hardcore, right-wing, real angry...
02:38:12.000 It's like alt-radio.
02:38:13.000 It's like alt-comics.
02:38:15.000 It's like alt-radio.
02:38:16.000 They decided...
02:38:17.000 It's like a genre of music.
02:38:19.000 You know how there's hardcore rap?
02:38:22.000 There's metal?
02:38:25.000 There's right-wing talk.
02:38:26.000 It's like...
02:38:29.000 You feel he is, right?
02:38:30.000 It kind of is.
02:38:31.000 And left-wing talk, too.
02:38:33.000 Like, NPR, here, welcome.
02:38:34.000 Welcome to our show.
02:38:36.000 We're going to tell you about a new scientific experiment that shows that there are no such thing as genders.
02:38:42.000 And then right-wing talk.
02:38:43.000 Gender is a construct. 1.00
02:38:45.000 There's a way that they talk.
02:38:47.000 There's a calmness to the way they explain things and lay things out that make you seem like there's no ambiguity.
02:38:53.000 There's no question whether or not they're right.
02:38:55.000 Yeah.
02:38:55.000 And here's why.
02:38:56.000 And this is what it is.
02:38:58.000 And then they always ask for money.
02:39:00.000 Yes.
02:39:00.000 Coronavirus did not come from a lab.
02:39:02.000 It's a dangerous conspiracy.
02:39:04.000 And here's why.
02:39:05.000 And here's why.
02:39:05.000 We talk to, and they always have an expert.
02:39:08.000 Are you sure?
02:39:09.000 I like it, man.
02:39:11.000 It's calming.
02:39:12.000 I'm into it.
02:39:12.000 Makes you feel good.
02:39:13.000 I'm into it.
02:39:14.000 Because I grew up listening to, my favorite is like hip hop stations, because they're always very excited.
02:39:19.000 Right.
02:39:20.000 Put your hands up, like all that.
02:39:21.000 Right.
02:39:22.000 And I love that energy, too.
02:39:23.000 But then you get to an age, you're like, I just want to hear some people just talking, man.
02:39:26.000 Just talk normal voice.
02:39:27.000 Yeah, yeah. 1.00
02:39:28.000 Just talk normal, quiet, I want to fuck you voice. 1.00
02:39:30.000 That's what that really is. 1.00
02:39:31.000 I want to fuck you voice, but I'm low-key about it. 1.00
02:39:34.000 Hello. 1.00
02:39:35.000 Yes.
02:39:35.000 Hello.
02:39:36.000 Yes.
02:39:37.000 I love wine.
02:39:39.000 I want a show on NPR. What's your favorite region?
02:39:41.000 If I had a show on NPR, would you do it?
02:39:43.000 Would I do?
02:39:44.000 I'd be a guest, yeah, for sure.
02:39:45.000 Yeah, good.
02:39:46.000 We're talking to Joe Rogan here.
02:39:47.000 We could do like an Onion version of NPR. I love it, man.
02:39:51.000 Because I'm a sucker. 0.63
02:39:53.000 I'm all in. 0.98
02:39:54.000 All animals are equal.
02:39:55.000 Yeah.
02:39:56.000 We've talked to some animals.
02:39:57.000 Yes.
02:39:58.000 We feel like they're all equal.
02:39:59.000 I do want to do a parody of an NPR show. 0.99
02:40:04.000 Because now they play dramatic music and shit. 0.99
02:40:07.000 Do they? 0.99
02:40:08.000 When they tell stories.
02:40:09.000 Like...
02:40:10.000 And you'll be listening to it, and then they'll be like, and then...
02:40:13.000 No, no, I'm confusing with The Daily.
02:40:15.000 Well, Radio Lab.
02:40:16.000 Isn't Radio Lab an NPR show?
02:40:18.000 Is Radio Lab put together by NPR? Mike Barbaro and The Daily, his show, man.
02:40:23.000 They be playing that dramatic music.
02:40:24.000 Oh, yeah?
02:40:24.000 And then Trump.
02:40:26.000 Is it good?
02:40:27.000 I love it.
02:40:28.000 I love it.
02:40:28.000 Yeah, Whitney just told me about The Daily.
02:40:30.000 She was posting something about it.
02:40:32.000 Here are three things you need to know.
02:40:34.000 What's up?
02:40:34.000 Technically WNYC. I don't know if that's NPR. All right.
02:40:39.000 WNYC was the fake radio station of news radio.
02:40:42.000 Yeah, I'm into it, man.
02:40:43.000 When I was on that news radio sitcom.
02:40:44.000 New York Public Radio, so it's not national public radio.
02:40:48.000 It's quite close, though.
02:40:49.000 So it's not NPR, but it's something like that.
02:40:51.000 It's some kind of public radio.
02:40:53.000 The Cousins.
02:40:53.000 Yeah, that's a great show.
02:40:55.000 You ever listen to Radiolab?
02:40:56.000 No. 1.00
02:40:56.000 Holy shit. 1.00
02:40:58.000 I used to get angry at Brian Count because he would tell me something as if he had gotten it from a book. 1.00
02:41:04.000 And I go, bitch, I listen to that same Radiolab! 1.00
02:41:07.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:41:10.000 Try to hit me with some scientific facts about what happened in World War II. I go, I listen to Radio Lab, too, bitch! 1.00
02:41:16.000 Stop! 1.00
02:41:18.000 Just stop it. 1.00
02:41:18.000 And you go, damn it! 1.00
02:41:19.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:41:20.000 And I go, Brian, why are you pretending you read?
02:41:21.000 Right, pretending to be smart.
02:41:23.000 I say read, and I really mean listen.
02:41:25.000 I listen to audiobooks.
02:41:27.000 Yeah, I was wondering, I was going to ask you that.
02:41:28.000 Can you say that, technically?
02:41:29.000 I do.
02:41:30.000 I lie.
02:41:31.000 It's a lie. 0.99
02:41:31.000 It's a dirty lie. 0.99
02:41:32.000 It's in there.
02:41:33.000 I read this book. 1.00
02:41:34.000 I never cracked a fucking page. 0.99
02:41:36.000 This is the book on Charles Manson, the CIA. This guy, Tom O'Neil, I had him on the podcast last week. 0.99
02:41:43.000 Bro, this guy spent 20 years researching this book.
02:41:47.000 20 years.
02:41:50.000 It's the craziest story just of how the book got created, but the story itself is bonkers.
02:41:55.000 They think that Charles Manson was a CIA asset and that they had let him Get away with being released from parole.
02:42:03.000 He was on parole and he got arrested.
02:42:06.000 They just let him out of jail like multiple times.
02:42:08.000 And they had the same LSD studies that they were running in Haight-Ashbury in San Francisco.
02:42:14.000 He went to that same clinic.
02:42:15.000 The people that did mind control that were a part of MKUltra, that were feeding people LSD and trying to control their mind and manipulate their psychology, they were all connected to him. 0.63
02:42:25.000 And they kept letting him go.
02:42:27.000 They were studying him. 1.00
02:42:29.000 They wanted to diminish the hippie movement and they wanted to study what it's like when you get some fucking madman who's spent half of his life in penitentiary and you give him a ton of LSD and let him fuck all the hippies he wants. 1.00
02:42:41.000 Holy shit, dude. 1.00
02:42:43.000 It's a nutty book, man. 1.00
02:42:45.000 Oh, wow.
02:42:46.000 It is nutty.
02:42:47.000 And he details it all.
02:42:49.000 There's more than 50 pages of references at the end of this book, citations and references.
02:42:55.000 It's all heavily documented.
02:42:58.000 It's crazy!
02:42:59.000 Is it going to be a movie? 0.99
02:43:00.000 Did that one fuck you up, Jamie? 1.00
02:43:02.000 That one fucked me up. 0.99
02:43:03.000 I'm still listening to the book. 0.84
02:43:04.000 I'm on chapter 11, 12, I think.
02:43:07.000 Just got through all the MKLT stuff.
02:43:08.000 Jesus Christ.
02:43:10.000 It's crazy.
02:43:10.000 Did you get through the one where he was discussing about the guy who they think they fed LSD to and programmed him to go kill that kid?
02:43:18.000 Oh, shit. 0.99
02:43:18.000 Did you get that one? 0.99
02:43:19.000 He talked about it on the podcast.
02:43:20.000 I might be right there.
02:43:22.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:43:22.000 Fuck. 1.00
02:43:24.000 Dude. 1.00
02:43:25.000 That's crazy.
02:43:26.000 They did all kinds of experiments on people in the 60s and 70s. 1.00
02:43:30.000 They just tried shit on people, man. 0.99
02:43:34.000 They're still probably doing it today. 1.00
02:43:36.000 What do you think?
02:43:36.000 Well, we were showing a video of these British soldiers from 1964 that they gave acid to.
02:43:43.000 And they just let them run around the field with fucking guns and they're laughing and falling down and giggling and shit. 0.99
02:43:49.000 And you can watch the video. 1.00
02:43:50.000 There's a video.
02:43:51.000 It's online. 1.00
02:43:53.000 Did you fuck with acid? 1.00
02:43:54.000 I have. 1.00
02:43:55.000 Yeah.
02:43:55.000 I mean, but I'm not taking it with a gun.
02:43:57.000 No.
02:43:58.000 With a bunch of other troops.
02:43:59.000 No.
02:44:00.000 Not only that, like, you're relying on those guys to keep it together on acid with a gun.
02:44:04.000 In the hot sun or wherever. 1.00
02:44:06.000 Oh, fuck that. 1.00
02:44:08.000 Yo, man. 1.00
02:44:09.000 How good is this Mike Tyson weed?
02:44:10.000 It's amazing.
02:44:12.000 This is the stoned Owen Smith.
02:44:13.000 Look at you.
02:44:14.000 I know, man.
02:44:15.000 Yo, I'm stoned on the internet, baby.
02:44:18.000 It's legal.
02:44:19.000 It's legal.
02:44:19.000 We're in California.
02:44:21.000 Oh my god, it's crazy.
02:44:22.000 I just thought of my mom watching this.
02:44:25.000 Oh no.
02:44:26.000 Tell her you're not breaking the law.
02:44:27.000 It's the same as having whiskey.
02:44:29.000 Isn't it funny?
02:44:29.000 It's like the whiskey part, no problem.
02:44:31.000 Right.
02:44:32.000 This is great, man.
02:44:33.000 As soon as you bust out the weed, they're like, what are they doing?
02:44:35.000 It's really good.
02:44:36.000 It's really good.
02:44:38.000 So what's your estimation of when we're going to get out of this?
02:44:40.000 If you had a guess.
02:44:42.000 Next year.
02:44:43.000 Next year.
02:44:43.000 Yeah, because I think it's going to be out and then the resurgence.
02:44:48.000 Like it'll be a second wave?
02:44:50.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:44:51.000 Next year.
02:44:52.000 I feel like this time next year.
02:44:55.000 That dude who said, we have all been vaccinated.
02:44:57.000 Yeah, what's that mean?
02:44:59.000 I wish I knew.
02:44:59.000 What's he talking about?
02:45:00.000 I wish I knew he was joking around or not.
02:45:03.000 I mean, he might have been. 1.00
02:45:05.000 I'm pretty adamant that he wasn't, but I'm an idiot. 0.99
02:45:08.000 He might have been joking around. 0.99
02:45:10.000 It didn't sound like he was joking around.
02:45:12.000 It didn't sound like he had a command of it.
02:45:14.000 It didn't sound like he was joking around, but I don't know that dude's personality, right?
02:45:17.000 That might be that thing that he does.
02:45:19.000 You know what I mean?
02:45:20.000 Like, Callan does a lot of that.
02:45:22.000 Callan will say jokes that sound like statements.
02:45:25.000 He does that all the time.
02:45:28.000 You know?
02:45:28.000 He's a funny...
02:45:30.000 I don't know.
02:45:31.000 I don't know either.
02:45:32.000 So you think next year?
02:45:33.000 Yeah, man.
02:45:34.000 I mean...
02:45:37.000 Like you said, though, too, because it's like, what's next, you know?
02:45:40.000 Is there going to be a gap between what this is and what's next?
02:45:42.000 Yeah.
02:45:44.000 Provided that there is nothing next, I feel like, next year.
02:45:47.000 Just because we're...
02:45:49.000 Even how they're talking about how you can go to concerts, but you're still up to six feet apart.
02:45:54.000 Right.
02:45:55.000 And that's not going to stop by the end of this year.
02:45:58.000 That's going to be something that, you know...
02:46:00.000 Unless they do come up with a vaccine.
02:46:02.000 Yeah.
02:46:02.000 Or some sort of a really, really efficient treatment, right?
02:46:06.000 Like some sort of treatment.
02:46:07.000 Yeah.
02:46:08.000 But I do think it...
02:46:10.000 I mean, they're hinting at saying it helps if you're healthier, if you do work out.
02:46:15.000 And all the things that we, as a collective society, should have been doing may start to take precedence.
02:46:21.000 But I feel like...
02:46:24.000 As far as what our livelihood is concerned about performing in front of people again, I feel like next year, because it's two-sided, it's us wanting to be on stage and then the audience feeling safe being there.
02:46:37.000 Jesus.
02:46:38.000 So I think it's going to be safe.
02:46:39.000 Next year?
02:46:39.000 I think.
02:46:40.000 How many people are going to fall apart?
02:46:41.000 How are comics going to make a living?
02:46:43.000 Like guys who are doing the road, like middle acts?
02:46:45.000 That's a great question.
02:46:47.000 I know, man.
02:46:48.000 Like, we don't know yet.
02:46:50.000 Right now, everybody's sort of floating, right?
02:46:51.000 Yeah.
02:46:52.000 It's been a month, and everybody's like, whoa.
02:46:54.000 Yeah.
02:46:55.000 Everyone's just sort of floating.
02:46:56.000 Like, what happens to those people that were, they had a system, they were doing good, then all of a sudden the rug gets pulled out from under them?
02:47:04.000 I don't know.
02:47:05.000 Jesus.
02:47:06.000 I thought if I got you high, you'd have all the answers.
02:47:08.000 I do have, I have some answers, but what they need to do, brother Joe.
02:47:14.000 Yeah, I think they, I didn't think of that, man.
02:47:18.000 Check to checking it.
02:47:20.000 You can...
02:47:22.000 I don't know, man.
02:47:23.000 Have you ever been contacted about doing anything online?
02:47:26.000 Being funny online?
02:47:27.000 Those things are preposterous.
02:47:30.000 I said I want to donate.
02:47:32.000 I'll give you money.
02:47:33.000 I know they're trying to raise money.
02:47:34.000 I'll just give you money.
02:47:36.000 How much do you need? 0.99
02:47:37.000 Clusterfuck. 0.91
02:47:38.000 I'd love to do a show. 0.59
02:47:40.000 Once we're back, I'll do shows for free.
02:47:42.000 I'd be happy to do that.
02:47:43.000 I'd be happy to do a bunch of shows.
02:47:45.000 I want to be able to do that.
02:47:47.000 As well as donate.
02:47:49.000 I'd love to be able to, if someone had a Problem.
02:47:53.000 I'd love to be able to sell out the Comedy Store and give them that money.
02:47:57.000 You know what I mean?
02:47:58.000 It's a nice feeling, too, because there's shows that you do where it benefits people.
02:48:04.000 There's an extra nice feeling.
02:48:05.000 So you get the nice feeling of the show, like doing your bits.
02:48:08.000 The bits make everybody laugh.
02:48:10.000 You get all that nice feeling, and then you get the nice feeling of that all went to a good thing.
02:48:14.000 Of course.
02:48:14.000 It feels great, man.
02:48:15.000 Charity shows are like my favorite shows because of just the way they make you feel.
02:48:19.000 Yeah.
02:48:20.000 Like, this is cool.
02:48:20.000 We all got together, made some money for this charity, and had fun.
02:48:25.000 And then it helps.
02:48:26.000 The money goes to a good cause.
02:48:28.000 We should do a lot of those, man.
02:48:30.000 I'm down to do them all the time.
02:48:32.000 I should probably figure out one to do a week once we get cracking again.
02:48:37.000 And just do one a week that's just a benefit for something.
02:48:41.000 We'll figure something out.
02:48:42.000 The day I can sell out something off my name, I'm going to be doing that a lot.
02:48:47.000 That's not gonna be far.
02:48:48.000 As soon as people see.
02:48:49.000 You're in a weird position, man, where you have this incredible act, but people don't know it.
02:48:54.000 It's a sneaky thing.
02:48:56.000 The hardest part is being funny.
02:48:59.000 You've got that.
02:49:01.000 You just spent so much time writing.
02:49:04.000 Doing commercials.
02:49:06.000 Yeah, well you spend so much time where you're in the machine and not just fully dedicated to being out there as a comic.
02:49:13.000 What if somebody wants to, what if a network wants to pick up notebooks?
02:49:18.000 Should I do it or should I stay on YouTube?
02:49:21.000 If they want to give you money, do it.
02:49:23.000 As long as there's enough money.
02:49:26.000 You could definitely do whatever you want if it's on YouTube and it should probably make some money.
02:49:33.000 Once people become more aware of it and people start downloading a lot of them, they're funny, man.
02:49:37.000 And it's also, everybody's got something from when they started.
02:49:42.000 And it's good for people to see that People that you see with a full Netflix special now, at one point in time, were terrible. 0.99
02:49:54.000 Garbage! 1.00
02:49:55.000 I was garbage. 1.00
02:49:56.000 But that's how you get better at it. 0.99
02:49:59.000 You've got to keep doing it.
02:50:00.000 There's no other way around it.
02:50:02.000 That's one of the things that I like about it, is in a lot of ways, comedy's a real meritocracy.
02:50:08.000 Yes.
02:50:08.000 Like, if people laugh, if they enjoy your stuff, then it works, and then it continues, and people keep coming to your shows, and you keep having fun.
02:50:18.000 There's a reward to that kind of a thing.
02:50:21.000 Yeah.
02:50:22.000 Especially when you don't have any collaborators, just putting it together yourself.
02:50:25.000 Yeah.
02:50:27.000 But now we'll appreciate it more.
02:50:29.000 Yeah, that's very true.
02:50:30.000 I appreciate it.
02:50:32.000 I just hope the clubs will be here when everything's said and done.
02:50:35.000 That's the real scary thing, is how many of these businesses are going to go under.
02:50:39.000 They will exist after this.
02:50:40.000 Yeah, well, plan on doing a lot of free shows.
02:50:43.000 I know.
02:50:46.000 Alright, let's wrap it up.
02:50:47.000 It's been fun, man.
02:50:47.000 Always, brother, always.
02:50:49.000 Owen Smith TV on YouTube.
02:50:51.000 Owen Smith TV on YouTube.
02:50:52.000 Subscribe, hit the notification.
02:50:53.000 Shows called The Notebooks.
02:50:55.000 Notebooks, No Ladies. 1.00
02:50:56.000 It's not like that movie that makes you cry.
02:50:59.000 You can't even take that.
02:51:00.000 You can't even take that name.
02:51:04.000 What is all your Instagram?
02:51:06.000 TextOwen.com to text me, literally.
02:51:09.000 And then Owen Smith for real on everything else.
02:51:13.000 Beautiful.
02:51:13.000 Thanks, sir.
02:51:14.000 Always a pleasure, my brother.
02:51:15.000 Bye everybody!