The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #1530 - Duncan Trussell

00:00:03.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.

00:00:05.000 Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.

00:00:14.000 Hello, Joe.

00:00:15.000 How are you, my friend?

00:00:16.000 I'm great, man.

00:00:17.000 I'm psyched to be here.

00:00:18.000 Cheers, sir.

00:00:19.000 Cheers, brother.

00:00:20.000 Hare Krishna.

00:00:21.000 Hare Krishna.

00:00:22.000 Great to see you.

00:00:24.000 Always.

00:00:26.000 That's good.

00:00:27.000 My friend, these are strange times and we're both departing this land.

00:00:32.000 I know.

00:00:33.000 For greener frosters. 0.83

00:00:34.000 I keep thinking back to when we first became friends and the strange path Since from there to here and all our predictions and all the things that we we never would have imagined this you know specifically like that there would be this fucking global pandemic that we would suddenly be like Some kind of like,

00:01:03.000 refugee is way too dramatic a word for it, but suddenly just part of this diaspora of comedians pouring out of L.A. And not just comedians, but just people leaving, man.

00:01:17.000 I talked to Joey today from New Jersey.

00:01:20.000 I called him.

00:01:21.000 He's in New Jersey and it was just so strange.

00:01:24.000 I'm like, you're in Jersey? 1.00

00:01:24.000 He's like, that's right, motherfucker. 1.00

00:01:26.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:01:27.000 You know, he's all happy in Jersey.

00:01:29.000 You know, he was the last.

00:01:30.000 Like, you leaving was intense.

00:01:33.000 But I was still like, you know, maybe we'll stick around and see what happens.

00:01:37.000 And then, like, I'd been getting all these, you know, the problem with me is, like, I get weird vibes all the time.

00:01:43.000 And, like, the last I was on here, I legitimately thought a meteor was going to hit the earth.

00:01:48.000 I really thought that, so I worked very hard on not listening to that part of me most of the time, but I was getting this real weird vibe from LA, and I'm like, come on, man, you're just superstitious.

00:01:59.000 It's probably nothing.

00:02:01.000 And then my wife would say, I'm getting a really weird vibe.

00:02:06.000 I don't know if we should stay here renting, if we should stay in the place.

00:02:10.000 And I didn't want to tell her, oh, I've been getting a weird vibe, too, because I didn't want to amplify it, whatever that was.

00:02:16.000 And then I got on the phone with Diaz, and he's like, yeah, I'm leaving. 0.72

00:02:19.000 Getting the fuck out of here. 0.98

00:02:21.000 And that was it. 0.99

00:02:22.000 Diaz was telling me Burbank was sketchy. 1.00

00:02:24.000 Where he lives in Burbank, because my neighborhood turned to shit. 1.00

00:02:27.000 Like, instantly. 0.99

00:02:29.000 Dude, it's like, yeah, it's not just any one thing.

00:02:34.000 You know, it's not just like some of the stuff I get, stuff had to get shut down, and because stuff was shut down, it got a little more weathered than usual.

00:02:42.000 And it's like, you know, the homeless encampments.

00:02:45.000 I was in Echo Park, man.

00:02:46.000 And I really feel like, you know, like the... 0.99

00:02:50.000 Red state people, one of the things they love to tweet is like, don't bring your liberal bullshit here, right? 0.99

00:02:56.000 They're right. 1.00

00:02:57.000 Well, that's where I'm eating shit a little bit because I do still believe that we need to decriminalize drugs, that the drug policy's bullshit, the way we're handling it's all wrong. 0.99

00:03:12.000 There used to be a way that they could get people who are like camping out on the streets. 0.99

00:03:17.000 And a lot of the times that was possession of like illegal drugs. 0.95

00:03:20.000 And because that stuff got removed, suddenly you were witnessing like, holy shit, man, there's people who are making like real drugs. 0.98

00:03:32.000 A rational decision from the perspective of a heroin addict, which is they love heroin so much. 0.94

00:03:38.000 You know that Doug Stanhope joke, some things are better than life?

00:03:41.000 Like they love heroin so much.

00:03:44.000 They're addicted to it.

00:03:45.000 They love it.

00:03:47.000 And the shelters that are apparently available won't let them do drugs in the shelters.

00:03:52.000 They want you to kick it.

00:03:53.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:03:54.000 And so that's ridiculous. 0.61

00:03:55.000 Now, I could be wrong about that, but that is what I've heard is one of the reasons these people are staying out in the street is not because they don't want to be in a shelter. 0.90

00:04:02.000 It's because they don't want to be prevented from getting high.

00:04:06.000 And so this has produced this, like...

00:04:09.000 Situation in a lot of the big cities, which is we're seeing like massive tent cities.

00:04:15.000 And by the way, the tent city thing, aesthetically, it's not the best look.

00:04:21.000 But the stuff that I began to experience in Echo Park, man, I took my kid to the playground, right?

00:04:27.000 And there's like a dude that looks like he emerged from a time portal, from an apocalypse.

00:04:34.000 You know what I mean?

00:04:35.000 I'm not talking about like...

00:04:37.000 You know, run-of-the-mill, like, somebody who's a junkie, who's like, I'm talking like, covered in, like, soot.

00:04:44.000 Like, pure dilated eyes.

00:04:48.000 Not wearing, like, you know...

00:04:51.000 The disheveled clothes you might expect from someone who's been addicted to heroin for a long time.

00:04:56.000 He broke into wherever the costumes from Mad Max were. 0.99

00:05:01.000 Some kind of weird leather vest thing and creepy fucking cut-off shorts. 0.99

00:05:08.000 And he had a Machete. 0.99

00:05:10.000 And he's throwing it into the ground of the playground and pulling it out like he's practicing throwing a machete. 1.00

00:05:17.000 I'm with my fucking toddler, man. 0.99

00:05:20.000 And you know, it's like, so obviously we didn't go to the playground, but that was, you know, my, you know, it was not uncommon in that area to see completely naked people. 0.99

00:05:31.000 Just not that that's bad, but not naked like the way- Covered in dirt, wandering aimlessly.

00:05:36.000 Yeah.

00:05:37.000 Even worse.

00:05:38.000 Worse than wandering aimlessly, wandering with what seems to be a purpose in their eyes.

00:05:42.000 Some of them seeming like they're late. 1.00

00:05:44.000 Where the fuck are you going naked that you're late for? 0.99

00:05:51.000 Like, are you being summoned? 1.00

00:05:53.000 But that wasn't just it, man.

00:05:55.000 You know, it's a lot of other things, too, and it all just started piling on top of it.

00:05:58.000 Dude, I don't think this is sustainable.

00:06:01.000 Living in giant groups of people, I think when it works great, It was wonderful.

00:06:06.000 When LA was working well, it was fantastic.

00:06:10.000 When the Comedy Store was packed, and restaurants were doing well, and the economy was doing well, and the crime wasn't high, it's great.

00:06:17.000 But when things go bad, there's no sense of community.

00:06:20.000 So then there's a sense of people capitalizing on other people who either own stores, or who aren't home, or whatever.

00:06:28.000 People who are desperate.

00:06:29.000 There's too many people.

00:06:31.000 If you're in a community that's a small town and something goes wrong, you can kind of bunch up together and help each other.

00:06:38.000 Because you feel like you need each other and you feel like you're a part of something.

00:06:42.000 People don't feel like they're a part of something here.

00:06:43.000 They're all transient.

00:06:44.000 Everybody's moved here from somewhere else.

00:06:47.000 Everybody thinks they can go somewhere else and they can and they probably will.

00:06:50.000 I mean, I, you know, we all came from, you were North Carolina, I came from New York at the time.

00:06:56.000 We all, everybody who comes to LA in show business, God, what are the percentage of, like, how many do we know that are just straight LA? Like, Christina Pazitsky, she's straight LA. Yeah.

00:07:07.000 Who else?

00:07:09.000 Sebastian came from Chicago, Theo came from Nashville, did, Nashville's where he came from?

00:07:16.000 No, Louisiana.

00:07:17.000 That's right.

00:07:18.000 I mean, Joey, obviously, Jersey.

00:07:21.000 Yeah.

00:07:21.000 Well, it's a gypsy town.

00:07:23.000 It's a gypsy town.

00:07:24.000 Which is something I've always loved about it.

00:07:26.000 I've loved that element of, like, just this wild vortex of artists and narcissists and people who've just gone insane.

00:07:33.000 And, like, it's a lot of...

00:07:35.000 The sparks fly in that kind of insane cauldron of identity.

00:07:41.000 All that stuff is super cool.

00:07:43.000 It's beautiful.

00:07:44.000 That's one of the things I loved about it.

00:07:45.000 It's like the place we all know this is a place where you make illusion.

00:07:50.000 That was the idea.

00:07:51.000 You make things that aren't real, seem real, and people like to watch that.

00:07:55.000 That's the whole TV movie industry.

00:07:57.000 The whole place is based on creating an identity that you somehow monetize or a studio monetizes your identity or something.

00:08:05.000 It was something magical and beautiful in all of that, but It seems like there's a real emperor-wears-no-clothes thing happening right now, not just in LA. I feel bad talking shit about LA because, man, she's been so good to both of us. 0.83

00:08:21.000 I mean, this city is like... 0.99

00:08:23.000 I will always love this place.

00:08:25.000 The problem is not the city.

00:08:27.000 I've been thinking about this a lot lately.

00:08:29.000 And here's an issue.

00:08:31.000 I am progressive on just about every issue across the board.

00:08:36.000 Gay rights, civil rights, women's rights, whatever, women's right to choose, fill in the blank. 0.98

00:08:42.000 Pro Medicaid, pro universal basic income, pro so many things.

00:08:48.000 There's a thing that happens in large cities, where large cities are always blue.

00:08:53.000 And I'm trying to figure this out.

00:08:54.000 Because like New York, and I used to think it's always because they're educated, you know, and educated people are more likely to be compassionate, and compassionate people are more likely to be Democrats.

00:09:05.000 But there's a balance that has to be achieved. 0.98

00:09:08.000 And when the shit hits the fan, you need law and order. 0.99

00:09:12.000 And I think that some people who are Democrats, who are progressive people, they don't understand that aspect of human nature. 0.99

00:09:20.000 Or they want to deny that aspect of human nature.

00:09:22.000 Like when the mayor of Seattle was dealing with that whole six-area lockdown, small little country that they had... 0.99

00:09:30.000 Put up barriers and shit. 0.98

00:09:32.000 Literally had armed guards there. 0.99

00:09:35.000 What was it called again?

00:09:37.000 Chop.

00:09:37.000 Chop or Chaz, right?

00:09:39.000 The mayor said, maybe this is our summer of love.

00:09:43.000 No, it's not summer of love.

00:09:44.000 Some people took over other people's businesses with force.

00:09:48.000 Just because they think the way you think, or they subscribe to liberal ideas like you, like you're a liberal too, so this is like your gang of thugs that you have to support when they take over other people's businesses?

00:09:59.000 No, we have to be able to call out everybody.

00:10:01.000 And just because somebody is on your side...

00:10:05.000 You can't let them take over city blocks and just institute their own government and then say it's the summer of love.

00:10:10.000 This is crazy talk.

00:10:11.000 And this is how...

00:10:13.000 This gets cities destroyed.

00:10:14.000 And this is what gets the police defunded.

00:10:16.000 And this is what gets people saying crazy things.

00:10:20.000 Like, we need to disband, release everyone from prison, and no more prisons, and no more laws, and no more police.

00:10:27.000 No!

00:10:28.000 The way things go well is you have to be safe.

00:10:32.000 The only way you're safe is if you have a strong military and a strong police force.

00:10:37.000 And there's something about liberals that don't want to believe that.

00:10:41.000 They see the bad cops, they see these videos, and we all agree.

00:10:45.000 We gotta get rid of bad cops. 0.96

00:10:47.000 They gotta reform the police.

00:10:48.000 They have to.

00:10:49.000 But those are not all the cops.

00:10:50.000 That's crazy.

00:10:51.000 You just only see the bad...

00:10:52.000 No one's filming excellent interactions with friendly cops and compliant people.

00:10:58.000 That's not what you're filming.

00:10:59.000 Not gonna get a lot of YouTube downloads.

00:11:02.000 But that's the majority of these interactions. 0.92

00:11:04.000 It's distorted perception based on what we're exposed to, which is viral videos of cops being cunts. 0.99

00:11:09.000 Because there are cops that are cunts. 1.00

00:11:11.000 Because there's people that are cunts. 1.00

00:11:13.000 And there's who knows how many fucking hundreds of thousands, if not millions of cops there are. 1.00

00:11:17.000 The odds that they're not hundreds and thousands of cunts is outrageous. 0.99

00:11:21.000 Well, you know what I've been doing with this whole fucking thing, man? 0.99

00:11:25.000 Because if I get... 0.98

00:11:26.000 Because you know me, the way my mind goes is not gonna be like... 0.99

00:11:30.000 Red state consciousness when it comes to that shit, because when I saw that Autonomous Zone pop up, I'm like, let's do it, baby! 0.99

00:11:38.000 Spread it out! 1.00

00:11:40.000 Come on! 0.61

00:11:41.000 But what did you think would be good?

00:11:42.000 What could good have come of that?

00:11:44.000 Well, I mean, the history of America is this beautiful, yet somewhat, like...

00:11:51.000 There's a mania, a utopian mania in the heart of, I think, the American spirit, which is like Americans identify with this.

00:12:01.000 George Carlin did a great job of desiccating it by saying it's called the American Dream because you've got to be asleep to believe it.

00:12:07.000 I love that joke.

00:12:08.000 But I love the American Dream.

00:12:09.000 And what's so beautiful about it is it's this idea of, like, I think together, We can do something new that's going to be better than anything that happened before.

00:12:20.000 And from that spirit, you get all great innovation that goes across all political ideologies, right?

00:12:27.000 So to me, you know, and they always call it, I've always loved that they call it the American experiment. 0.88

00:12:32.000 Fucking love that, man, because it's an experiment. 0.79

00:12:34.000 It's like, let's see what we could do here together. 0.97

00:12:36.000 And for an experiment to work, We need to be able to look at what didn't work in the experiment and improve upon it.

00:12:44.000 Now, that being said, it's like for me, I've been trying to like pull myself out of the even though I identify as a progressive, I'm going to vote Democrat.

00:12:54.000 That's just what I'm going to do.

00:12:56.000 But that being said, I try to pull myself out of that because I don't want to be cubby-holed, man.

00:13:01.000 And I have a lot of friends who are like hardcore conservatives.

00:13:04.000 And I know that there is this idea, and I think a lot of the idea gets perpetrated by people who are into tribalism, blue, red.

00:13:12.000 And so the blue people, they propagate conceptualization of the red people, which is kind of what you said. 0.99

00:13:19.000 Well, they're not compassionate. 1.00

00:13:21.000 It's like, shut the fuck up! 1.00

00:13:23.000 Ridiculous. 1.00

00:13:24.000 Get the fuck out of here. 1.00

00:13:25.000 These are some of the most compassionate people I've ever met in my fucking life. 1.00

00:13:28.000 They would die for people that they've never met. 0.99

00:13:31.000 Don't you think a big problem is the figurehead right now in the Republican Party is Trump?

00:13:35.000 Yes.

00:13:35.000 Trump is such a polarizing figure and he doesn't seem to have much empathy, if any.

00:13:42.000 You don't know who he is really because you don't talk to him privately, but his public persona is that of a winner who doesn't give a fuck and you're fired. 0.99

00:13:49.000 I mean, that's a non-empathetic perspective. 0.98

00:13:52.000 And we associate people who support him with also lacking empathy.

00:13:57.000 Then you add into it children in cages at the border and you see those videos.

00:14:02.000 You know what bothered me more than anything about the kids in cages?

00:14:05.000 There was one video that really bothered me where Mike Pence went to visit.

00:14:10.000 Like he's on the ground, like next to the cages.

00:14:13.000 See if you can find that.

00:14:14.000 Mike Pence visiting the border cages.

00:14:17.000 Now, apparently these cages had been put up through Obama, and that's what's interesting about this whole border wall and border discussion and immigration discussion, because Obama, particularly when he was running for president, he was very tough on illegal immigration.

00:14:31.000 I mean, he said a lot of the same things that Trump said.

00:14:34.000 If you listen to the speeches that Obama said, people believed him and agreed with him because it wasn't a Republican talking point.

00:14:42.000 It was just a safety talking point.

00:14:44.000 And it was also a way that he could get people that were more like...

00:14:48.000 More concerned about the problem with illegal immigration.

00:14:52.000 He could tie that up with just saying, listen, we have to follow the rule of law.

00:14:57.000 They had these talks and they built these cages.

00:15:01.000 They did that during the Obama administration, right?

00:15:05.000 So here's this.

00:15:07.000 These are the guys that fled from Mexico and who knows where else and came through the Mexican border.

00:15:15.000 And then Pence is standing there in front of these guys. 0.99

00:15:19.000 So imagine, you're a dude, you live in Ecuador, and you make your way up through Mexico because you have a fucking dream. 0.98

00:15:29.000 America is the land where people can make it. 0.93

00:15:31.000 This is a guy who fights in the UFC. His name is Marlon Vera.

00:15:34.000 And he's a bad motherfucker. 1.00

00:15:36.000 And he just won this weekend. 1.00

00:15:37.000 And he's, I believe he's from Ecuador, right?

00:15:39.000 That's Marlon's...

00:15:41.000 Yes.

00:15:42.000 And he talked about it in his victory speech.

00:15:46.000 He was talking about, you know, how, hey man, you know, you can actually do it.

00:15:49.000 He came over here.

00:15:50.000 He was talking about it in the Countdown show, too.

00:15:52.000 He came over here.

00:15:53.000 He lived a year without his family, just building up money and fighting to try to get money to bring his family over.

00:15:57.000 And then he brought his family over.

00:15:58.000 And then as time has gone on...

00:16:00.000 He keeps winnings on like a seven fight win streak and now he's like a top ten contender in the UFC and He could have been one of those dudes.

00:16:06.000 That's right See this this this is not these are just people that are in a fucking terrible place They're trying to get out putting him in cages like it just it's a bad look and it's an even worse Imagine you're that guy who comes over from Ecuador and you're in this cage and you see Pence He could touch him You could touch him.

00:16:25.000 If that cage wasn't there, you could reach over and touch him on the shoulder. 0.68

00:16:28.000 He's right there. 0.99

00:16:29.000 The fucking guy who's second in line to the most powerful army the world has ever known. 1.00

00:16:37.000 Trump's the commander in chief. 1.00

00:16:38.000 That's number two.

00:16:39.000 And he's right there in front of a cage.

00:16:41.000 And he doesn't seem to care.

00:16:43.000 Like, play this.

00:16:44.000 It's weird.

00:16:45.000 I don't know how I want him to look, but he's not like looking at the people.

00:16:51.000 He's kind of like looking away.

00:16:53.000 He's kind of like ignoring the people.

00:16:54.000 I mean, I don't know what you're supposed to do.

00:16:56.000 Are you supposed to look at them?

00:16:57.000 Would they fill you with sorrow and despair?

00:17:00.000 Would you not be able to rationalize and disconnect yourself from the humans that are suffering? 0.95

00:17:05.000 When you think about All of us were basically the products of a fucking enormous chain of events. 0.90

00:17:13.000 Not one thing, but they have foil blankets, man. 1.00

00:17:17.000 I mean, this is crazy shit. 0.99

00:17:19.000 They're stacked in there, stacked on top of each other, wearing foil blankets. 1.00

00:17:24.000 Yeah, it's terrible.

00:17:26.000 Look at that guy.

00:17:27.000 He's thinking about his kids.

00:17:28.000 Yes.

00:17:29.000 He's got a family back home.

00:17:30.000 No, his kids got separated from him.

00:17:32.000 That too.

00:17:33.000 That's what he's thinking about.

00:17:34.000 And again, man, I keep trying to get out of the...

00:17:41.000 This is what I've realized, because I love flipping through.

00:17:47.000 I will jump back and forth from Fox News to CNN to MSNBC. I'll check out some Tucker Carlson.

00:17:55.000 Blast over to Rachel Maddow. 1.00

00:17:57.000 Find these polar opposites.

00:18:01.000 I feel like what's happening just as a result of the entertainment that is news is that we're getting a very non-nuanced...

00:18:09.000 We're being told what we are, basically.

00:18:11.000 Do you listen to or watch The Hill?

00:18:13.000 No.

00:18:14.000 You should watch Rising, The Hill.

00:18:16.000 It's Crystal and Sagar.

00:18:18.000 And Sagar is a Republican and Crystal is a Democrat.

00:18:24.000 But both of them super smart and really rational and they're honest.

00:18:28.000 That's cool.

00:18:29.000 They're honest and they're nonpartisan.

00:18:31.000 They break things down based on their honest interpretation of what's going on.

00:18:36.000 Yeah.

00:18:36.000 And it's so refreshing.

00:18:37.000 These two right here.

00:18:38.000 Crystal Ball and Sagar and Getty. 0.99

00:18:40.000 They are fucking fantastic. 0.98

00:18:42.000 And I love the fact that they're friends, yet she's left, he's right. 0.99

00:18:47.000 It's not bullshit. 0.76

00:18:48.000 They're not frauds. 0.91

00:18:49.000 You think her real name is Crystal Ball? 1.00

00:18:52.000 If my last name was Ball, I'd name my daughter Crystal. 0.69

00:18:54.000 It's dope. 0.55

00:18:56.000 Come on.

00:18:57.000 You would not name her.

00:18:58.000 I'd call her Magic Crystal Ball.

00:19:02.000 It's like, I don't know, man.

00:19:03.000 Why not?

00:19:04.000 Well, because you do that, and you're going to like...

00:19:09.000 I didn't even notice it until now because I'm not name-a-phobic.

00:19:12.000 I'm not name-a-phobic.

00:19:13.000 My name's Duncan.

00:19:14.000 I am named.

00:19:15.000 How do you think?

00:19:17.000 I'm sensitive to names like that because if their real name is Crystal Ball, be a third grader named Crystal Ball.

00:19:23.000 Have fun with that.

00:19:25.000 Well, third grader, you might be able to get away with it, but 10th grade, you're going to get tortured.

00:19:28.000 By the time girls reach 15. And Crystal Balls! 1.00

00:19:31.000 Yeah, yes.

00:19:32.000 It's like a never-ending, you know.

00:19:33.000 Anyway, to me, it's like...

00:19:37.000 The propaganda, it's propaganda.

00:19:40.000 And the reality of it is, I'm trying to figure out what do we all have in common?

00:19:46.000 It sounds like a cheesy thing.

00:19:47.000 And what we all have in common is we want to be happy.

00:19:50.000 When I talk to my liberal friends, They want to be happy.

00:19:56.000 When I talk to my conservative friends, they want to be happy.

00:19:58.000 And then you add to it. 0.99

00:20:00.000 Now, this is where shit gets weird. 0.99

00:20:01.000 A lot of people want to be a hero. 0.99

00:20:03.000 And why wouldn't you?

00:20:04.000 A lot of people want to help other people.

00:20:06.000 They have a service mentality.

00:20:08.000 They want to die for something good.

00:20:10.000 A lot of people really do want to help.

00:20:12.000 And then that's, to me, where the problems start.

00:20:14.000 It's because that's being subverted.

00:20:16.000 And the way it's being subverted is... 0.98

00:20:18.000 You know what sucks, man? 0.85

00:20:19.000 When you're around somebody who's telling you how you feel. 0.90

00:20:21.000 Have you ever had that happen where you're around someone and they're like...

00:20:24.000 Why are you unhappy today?

00:20:25.000 And you're not unhappy.

00:20:26.000 But if you're not careful, you'll be like, maybe I'm unhappy.

00:20:30.000 And then you then you become the unhappy thing and they've like sucked you into a thing you're not.

00:20:34.000 And so for me, this is the danger of the news is they kind of tell us how we are, how we feel. 0.99

00:20:40.000 First of all, this ridiculous red blue bullshit. 1.00

00:20:43.000 It's like, stop. 1.00

00:20:44.000 I mean, every single person I've ever met I don't think I've ever met anybody who wouldn't try to help someone who is drowning.

00:20:52.000 I think most people I meet are like that, and I think that transcends politics.

00:20:57.000 But somehow they've got us thinking we're all different and separate. 0.98

00:21:00.000 And then on top of it, the thing that really bothers me and annoys me, obviously, man, I'm no fucking Trump fan. 1.00

00:21:05.000 That guy's a lunatic and he's driving people crazy. 1.00

00:21:07.000 But what bothers me is He is! 1.00

00:21:10.000 Can you pass that line?

00:21:12.000 No, for sure.

00:21:13.000 He's driving people nuts.

00:21:14.000 It's just the way you said it.

00:21:15.000 And what bothers me is that the response from really intelligent people who consider themselves Liberals is they're shaming these people.

00:21:28.000 They're shaming them. 1.00

00:21:29.000 They're saying, oh, they're idiots. 1.00

00:21:30.000 They're rednecks. 1.00

00:21:31.000 They're dumb. 1.00

00:21:31.000 They're peasants, stupid peasants. 1.00

00:21:33.000 How could you like him? 1.00

00:21:34.000 It's like how they liked this guy because they thought that he was going to help their families. 0.99

00:21:39.000 They were fucking, they were not doing great economically. 0.98

00:21:43.000 They bought into a thing and they invested themselves in it. 0.99

00:21:47.000 And if they are starting to like, it's dawning on them that they succumb to another American tradition.

00:21:54.000 Which is a con artist.

00:21:55.000 This is an American tradition. 0.95

00:21:57.000 It's American to be a con artist and it's American to get sucked in by one.

00:22:01.000 Happens to the best of us.

00:22:02.000 It's happened to me at a Grateful Dead concert. 0.99

00:22:04.000 We wanted to buy a hundred hits of fucking acid. 1.00

00:22:07.000 This son of a bitch got us a sheet of acid, convinced us to try to sell it, to make more money, to get more acid. 1.00

00:22:12.000 We left there with one mushroom stem on the way back to Hendersonville. 1.00

00:22:16.000 I've been conned.

00:22:17.000 I know what it's like.

00:22:18.000 It's a very American thing, but it's like...

00:22:20.000 So there was no acid at all?

00:22:21.000 Dude, he's, no, we got, we took our money to buy acid, and then he's like, we could sell this acid and buy more acid, and then, you know, we're like, yeah, let's do it, and then he sold the acid, I guess, and then we were going to buy more.

00:22:35.000 The point is, like...

00:22:36.000 You started a business. 1.00

00:22:37.000 My friend almost gave him his fucking car. 1.00

00:22:40.000 This was a very charismatic hippie. 1.00

00:22:42.000 He looked exactly the way you'd expect him. 1.00

00:22:44.000 A fucking hippie bandana, big hippie beard. 0.99

00:22:48.000 Some people are good at that, and it's weird. 1.00

00:22:50.000 They do weird things.

00:22:51.000 They talk a little too close to you.

00:22:53.000 They make you uncomfortable.

00:22:54.000 Yeah, they use neuro-linguistic programming.

00:22:58.000 They just get you.

00:23:00.000 They know how to talk.

00:23:01.000 When I used to work at Newport Creamery, I'd work the register sometimes, and we had lessons on how to deal with flim-flam artists. 1.00

00:23:08.000 That's what they called them, flim-flam artists. 1.00

00:23:10.000 So they would teach you. 0.99

00:23:11.000 So we had to sit there and be taught how someone will fuck you up. 0.99

00:23:16.000 Something would cost three bucks, and they'll give you a 20. And they'll say, hey, can you give me a 10 and a 5, and then the rest in quarters? 0.99

00:23:24.000 And you're like, what?

00:23:25.000 How much is that?

00:23:26.000 And then before you know it, he's saying something else and talking over you and you think you owe him $40.

00:23:32.000 Like you're giving him more money.

00:23:33.000 It's like, I gave you a $50, so you give me the $20, that $20, and then what is it?

00:23:37.000 It was $3, so you owe me $47.

00:23:39.000 So before you know it, you're giving money away and you don't understand what's happening.

00:23:43.000 Especially when you're a kid.

00:23:44.000 I was like...

00:23:45.000 I think I was 16 when I was working there.

00:23:46.000 I was a monkey.

00:23:47.000 Basically a monkey.

00:23:48.000 These people travel all over the place and they do this to folks.

00:23:52.000 They just trick them.

00:23:54.000 They pickpocket them.

00:23:55.000 Watching David Blaine do card tricks from as close as you are to me.

00:24:00.000 I don't get it.

00:24:01.000 I don't know what he's doing.

00:24:02.000 He could get me every time.

00:24:04.000 He's going to trick me every time.

00:24:05.000 He's so good at it.

00:24:06.000 And there's guys that are, I don't know if they're at that level, but there's guys at a level that you or I can't perceive, and they'll steal your watch.

00:24:14.000 There's guys who can get your watch off.

00:24:16.000 They can get your watch off.

00:24:17.000 I don't know how they do it, but it's a known thing.

00:24:20.000 It's a known thing that guys know how to get your watch off. 1.00

00:24:22.000 Fucking guys! 0.99

00:24:23.000 I mean, how many videos on YouTube? 1.00

00:24:24.000 There's awesome videos of children doing this to people.

00:24:28.000 You could see kids get trained to do this.

00:24:31.000 It's hacking our operating system, essentially.

00:24:34.000 He stuffed a card into my friend Jeff's watch band, and Jeff didn't even know it was in there.

00:24:39.000 And he's like, look, it's there.

00:24:41.000 And he's like, what?

00:24:42.000 And he looks at his watchman and he's like, pull it out.

00:24:43.000 And it's the card he was looking for.

00:24:45.000 Folded up, tucked into his watchman.

00:24:47.000 You're like, what did you just do?

00:24:48.000 So if that guy's a thief, if he was like some, like, oh, is this someone stealing something?

00:24:53.000 Yeah.

00:24:53.000 There's a whole genre of YouTube video.

00:24:55.000 Oh boy.

00:24:56.000 Look at that.

00:24:57.000 Wow.

00:24:58.000 Little tiny kids.

00:24:59.000 Yeah.

00:25:00.000 They're trained. 1.00

00:25:02.000 They're trained to steal shit. 1.00

00:25:03.000 They practice. 1.00

00:25:03.000 Yeah, they practice to do it. 1.00

00:25:05.000 I mean, this is just...

00:25:06.000 Look, we see this on the human realm and we're like, oh my god, they're children.

00:25:10.000 You see a coral reef and a little fish come and take food from another fish.

00:25:14.000 It's like just totally normal.

00:25:15.000 I mean, it's not even...

00:25:16.000 This is just part of being in a hive.

00:25:18.000 Did that guy just steal that guy's watch?

00:25:20.000 Is that what just happened?

00:25:22.000 Bro, back that up.

00:25:23.000 That was crazy.

00:25:24.000 Look, watch how this guy bumps into this guy. 0.98

00:25:26.000 He takes his watch.

00:25:28.000 Watch this.

00:25:31.000 Is that what he did?

00:25:32.000 No.

00:25:32.000 No, the guy still had a watch on.

00:25:33.000 What did he steal?

00:25:36.000 You'll never know.

00:25:37.000 I'm too high for this.

00:25:39.000 I'm too high for this.

00:25:40.000 But I've never seen anybody take someone's watch off, but I know it's a real thing.

00:25:44.000 Like, guys can actually take your watch off.

00:25:45.000 Yeah.

00:25:46.000 I mean, like, one with a strap, where they do the buckle.

00:25:48.000 It's annoying for you to do.

00:25:50.000 Yeah.

00:25:50.000 Dude, I, like, to me, this is a natural part of the environment we're in.

00:25:55.000 How many things camouflage themselves as other things, take energy out of a system using the camouflage. 0.97

00:26:00.000 It's completely fucking normal. 0.90

00:26:01.000 Sure, it's nature. 0.99

00:26:02.000 Nature.

00:26:02.000 And so you get this Trump...

00:26:04.000 And you get people who fell for it, and now those people are deeply invested in that magic trick, which he did.

00:26:12.000 And by the way, this is another thing.

00:26:13.000 It's like, look, you don't have to like somebody.

00:26:17.000 I don't like Charles Manson.

00:26:19.000 Yeah. 0.96

00:26:19.000 But, man, I do recognize, like, how fucking entertaining he is. 0.96

00:26:24.000 You know what I mean? 0.98

00:26:25.000 Like, that's a very entertaining cult leader.

00:26:27.000 Similarly with Trump.

00:26:28.000 Not a fan. 0.98

00:26:29.000 You know, the moment he said, he implied you should shoot looters.

00:26:32.000 Look, we can go on and on with anti-bullying.

00:26:34.000 I'm not talking about that.

00:26:35.000 I'm saying the problem is that our tactic as Americans is not supposed to be we listen to the state And get our cues about how to be good people from the state. 0.94

00:26:45.000 As Americans, what we do is we have basic fundamental ideas that are really fucking beautiful.

00:26:52.000 One of them being that we believe that people have a right to be free and seek their own personal happiness.

00:26:59.000 That's beautiful, man.

00:27:00.000 We shouldn't have the state telling us different versions of what that is.

00:27:06.000 We have to be intelligent and autonomous enough to do that for ourselves and then from that really be a United States. 0.99

00:27:14.000 And what's happening now is these motherfuckers are not unifying us. 0.99

00:27:20.000 This is supposed to be the United States of America. 1.00

00:27:22.000 That's what it's supposed to be. 0.95

00:27:23.000 So if you're a government official here, and you're doing a thing that's making it all divided and fucked up, and you're telling lies, and you're shaming people for telling the truth, it doesn't matter if you're a Republican or a Democrat. 0.97

00:27:35.000 Whatever you are is, as far as I'm concerned, anti-American. 0.99

00:27:38.000 Which is like, man, Americans, and fuck anybody who gets mad at me for saying this, Americans are beautiful people. 0.99

00:27:44.000 We both tour, we get to meet people all over the fucking place and talk to them, and they're always generally wonderful. 1.00

00:27:50.000 Yes, some of them will take your fucking watch. 0.99

00:27:52.000 You know what I mean? 0.99

00:27:53.000 But still, you know, in general...

00:27:55.000 In general.

00:27:56.000 That you encounter very...

00:27:57.000 When things were going well.

00:27:59.000 See, this is the thing that shifts everything is COVID. The reason why everybody's ramped up, I mean, it's no small feat.

00:28:05.000 It's not just about getting sick.

00:28:06.000 It's about everybody being scared that they're going to lose loved ones or they're going to die or they're going to lose lung function.

00:28:12.000 You can't work, so you're worried about your income.

00:28:14.000 There's so many people whose businesses are eroding right before their eyes.

00:28:19.000 I mean, imagine if you own commercial real estate now.

00:28:22.000 Jesus Christ.

00:28:23.000 And you start thinking of the prospect of leasing a building that you invested all your money in out to some folks.

00:28:29.000 They're not going to have offices like that anymore. 0.99

00:28:31.000 People are going to do shit from home. 0.95

00:28:33.000 There's a lot of people that are actually more productive working from home. 1.00

00:28:36.000 I know. 0.99

00:28:36.000 It's a fucked up time. 0.99

00:28:38.000 So everybody's on eight. 0.99

00:28:40.000 Everybody's walking around on eight trying to keep it together.

00:28:42.000 That's right.

00:28:42.000 And so a guy like Trump exacerbates it.

00:28:46.000 Because he doesn't ever come out with a unity speech.

00:28:49.000 He's always the strong boss, you're fired, I'm the man.

00:28:55.000 This is the message and it works with a lot of people.

00:28:58.000 Look, it's like comedy or music. 0.95

00:29:01.000 Not everything works on everybody, but there's a lot of people that vibe with his fucking real cartoonish version of being the boss, right?

00:29:10.000 It's not a bring everybody together thing.

00:29:13.000 And this is what we need.

00:29:14.000 We need the guy in the movie that stands on top of the hill.

00:29:17.000 The guy that says, we have more in similarity than we do that we disagree with.

00:29:24.000 Yeah, man.

00:29:25.000 We're together.

00:29:25.000 We're friends.

00:29:26.000 Most people, most of our issues, we could work out amicably.

00:29:31.000 We could talk.

00:29:32.000 Most of our issues.

00:29:33.000 The vast majority.

00:29:35.000 And we need to not just dwell on those, but embrace those.

00:29:39.000 Like, embrace all the things we like.

00:29:41.000 We want safe schools for our kids.

00:29:43.000 We want safe streets. 0.99

00:29:45.000 We want a fucking bridge maintenance so the bridges don't collapse. 0.99

00:29:50.000 We want everybody to be okay. 0.99

00:29:52.000 Yeah.

00:29:52.000 We want no crime.

00:29:54.000 We don't want unjust prison.

00:29:56.000 We don't want people being unjustly accused and then sentenced to life in jail and other people to work forever to get them.

00:30:02.000 We don't want any of that.

00:30:03.000 We don't want any prosecutors that hide evidence that shows that a person was innocent.

00:30:07.000 That's real today in 2020. They don't even get in trouble for it.

00:30:11.000 Yeah, man.

00:30:12.000 It's right.

00:30:12.000 It's true.

00:30:16.000 Maybe this is naive.

00:30:17.000 I think we got to get over our addiction to the person on the hill.

00:30:21.000 We got to get over our addiction to the idea that the way we govern is the only way to govern.

00:30:25.000 That's it.

00:30:26.000 And that's why when I see that, what was it called again?

00:30:28.000 A Chaz? 0.99

00:30:29.000 You know, again, like...

00:30:31.000 Yeah!

00:30:32.000 To me, what I'm seeing there is at the very least a radical experiment and a potential.

00:30:38.000 It's a temper tantrum by some 20-year-old kids who hate capitalism.

00:30:42.000 How old were the founding fathers?

00:30:43.000 That's a good question, but they didn't have YouTube.

00:30:46.000 I think they would have formed a much better opinion.

00:30:49.000 And this is the other part of it.

00:30:50.000 So I keep thinking about, and again, man, this is where my case is going to start falling apart, but...

00:30:56.000 That's okay.

00:30:57.000 I don't mind if my case falls apart.

00:30:58.000 For me, I keep thinking like, okay, so what are they telling us now?

00:31:02.000 They're saying, well, either you're a socialist or a capitalist or a communist.

00:31:06.000 Tell me what kind of ist I am or what ism I'm into.

00:31:09.000 And I keep thinking like, man, Isn't it possible, with all the technology we have, that there's a newism?

00:31:17.000 That doesn't have the first part of the word attached to it?

00:31:21.000 Good point.

00:31:22.000 And so, at the very least, if you meet someone who's like, Passionate in a real way. 0.56

00:31:30.000 Not in a bullshit way, by the way, man.

00:31:31.000 Because there's a big difference between... 0.71

00:31:33.000 You know right away when you run into somebody who's trying to tell you how to be.

00:31:37.000 It's horrible.

00:31:38.000 Even if it's in a light way.

00:31:40.000 It's so dronesome. 0.99

00:31:46.000 Some people want you sick. 0.96

00:31:47.000 Some people want you destabilized and unbalanced.

00:31:50.000 One thing's for sure, people don't want you to know who you are, because if you know who you are, they can't tell you who you are.

00:31:55.000 But, you know, if you run into someone who's legitimately a utopian, here we go. 0.98

00:32:01.000 Get ready to lose fucking viewers right now, baby. 0.97

00:32:05.000 This is where people press stop on Spotify, go on to listen to my favorite murder or whatever. 0.99

00:32:10.000 But I was at Burning Man, and...

00:32:14.000 Stop! 1.00

00:32:16.000 Stop! 1.00

00:32:17.000 Stop! 1.00

00:32:18.000 Stop! 1.00

00:32:19.000 Hey, man, I am sure Burning Man is like everything else in the world.

00:32:22.000 There's a lot of profound conversations and few of them that want to make you just bury your head in the sand.

00:32:27.000 Definitely.

00:32:28.000 But one, this guy came up to me, just getting these great chats, and this guy came up to me.

00:32:33.000 We're just yapping, and he said, do you think world peace is possible?

00:32:37.000 He wasn't being a missionary or anything.

00:32:39.000 Just asking.

00:32:40.000 It's a real question, but it's so cliche that it seems like a joke question that a moron would ask you. 1.00

00:32:45.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:32:45.000 Isn't that funny? 0.99

00:32:46.000 What would you want more than that?

00:32:48.000 World equality, world financial equality, world peace.

00:32:53.000 There's like four or five things you would ever say. 0.99

00:32:56.000 Like, look, that might cure up a lot of shit. 1.00

00:32:57.000 Yeah, that's right. 1.00

00:32:58.000 But to ask it is so cliche.

00:33:01.000 You could do it at Burning Man.

00:33:03.000 What?!

00:33:03.000 World peace!

00:33:04.000 Well, you know, and that's the other thing. 0.99

00:33:05.000 If, like, let's say you're at the Venice Boardwalk and some son of a bitch dressed like Uncle Sam comes and asks you that, you're gonna, like, go the other direction. 1.00

00:33:12.000 Like, fuck you! 1.00

00:33:13.000 Like, you're just gonna leave, right? 1.00

00:33:15.000 Maybe if you get out of Nicaragua, man!

00:33:17.000 Yeah, yeah, but he was actually somebody who's really into Buckminster Fuller, and I think that was something Buckminster Fuller put out there, which is like, this question is very important, and you should ask yourself this as an individual, because if you think world peace is possible...

00:33:31.000 Right.

00:33:33.000 Even if you acknowledge that maybe right now it's not possible, but if you can invent in your mind some technology, or even if you can invent in your mind like an X, like an algebra for a thing you don't have the space for yet, but it could be.

00:33:45.000 If there's any sense in you at all that world peace is possible, then from that point forward, You should be part of whatever it is that's going to make us have that great utopian ideal that transcends American borders.

00:34:01.000 That's the other problem, is the American dream thing.

00:34:04.000 It's not the American dream, it's the human dream.

00:34:07.000 The human dream is the intuition we all have that there's a way for us to be on the planet together that doesn't involve blowing each other up.

00:34:15.000 And I think it's possible.

00:34:17.000 I think it's possible.

00:34:18.000 I just don't know how to get there necessarily, but I think it's possible. 0.98

00:34:23.000 And one thing's for sure, whenever you get a Trump or any fucking pundit blowing out divisive shit into people's brains, if there's like a scale, one side's world peace, one side's chaos, they're dropping their pebbles on the chaos part of the scale. 0.98

00:34:41.000 And it's like- Why do you think They're doing that. 1.00

00:34:43.000 Because, man, let me tell you, there's a lot of money to be made in fucking chaos, man. 0.99

00:34:47.000 There's a lot of money. 0.99

00:34:48.000 I mean, isn't that what an engine is?

00:34:50.000 An engine is kind of like controlled explosions.

00:34:52.000 Do you remember when Trump talked openly once about the military industrial complex?

00:34:57.000 Yeah.

00:34:58.000 And they said they want to go to war?

00:34:59.000 Yeah.

00:35:00.000 And you're like, what? 0.99

00:35:01.000 The problem is he says so many other things that are ridiculous. 0.98

00:35:06.000 I know. 0.97

00:35:07.000 If only he just said that.

00:35:09.000 If only he just said that. 1.00

00:35:10.000 The problem with him saying that is you can go, yeah, yeah, yeah, but he also called this chick he fucked a horse face. 1.00

00:35:16.000 And you go, oh yeah, that's not that nice. 0.99

00:35:21.000 He had... 0.90

00:35:23.000 He had a he had a thing there like a moment like an Eisenhower moment not quite as eloquent But when Eisenhower was on television he warned people about the military-industrial complex as he was leaving office That's to this day like one of the most profound speeches I've ever seen because yeah It gives me a chill because I think well this is black and white from how many fucking years ago? 0.94

00:35:42.000 Yeah, if this shit was going on then it's not like it stopped going on didn't stop See, one of the reasons why we're in such a fucked up space politically is because this is the first time where politics have been really exposed to the general public by the internet. 0.83

00:35:58.000 Like, you have a different access to politics than you never had before. 0.99

00:36:01.000 You have real-time things breaking.

00:36:04.000 You find out, like if someone, like Gavin Newsom said he was going to take a pay cut, he didn't.

00:36:09.000 Fox News print says it goes wild.

00:36:10.000 And you get all these stories like, oh, would you have known that before?

00:36:14.000 Cell phones and the internet?

00:36:16.000 I've never known that he didn't do that.

00:36:17.000 You would have to be a person who's really into politics.

00:36:19.000 And there's not that many of them.

00:36:20.000 Most people are busy.

00:36:21.000 So now, politics relies on scandals.

00:36:25.000 And scandals are what weasels people through.

00:36:28.000 That's it.

00:36:28.000 So, the thing about scandals is, not everybody's a good person.

00:36:33.000 And if you do a lot of fucked up shit, but you own it the way Trump did, people didn't count on the asshole vote. 1.00

00:36:39.000 Because there's a lot of assholes out there, and finally they had a king. 1.00

00:36:43.000 They're like, this is our king! 1.00

00:36:44.000 Fuck yeah! 1.00

00:36:45.000 MAGA! They wear the fucking sunglasses and they talk shit to Ted Cruz at rallies. 1.00

00:36:50.000 Those guys finally had a king. 1.00

00:36:53.000 There was no king on the other side.

00:36:56.000 There was no king, the compassionate, intelligent king who actually made sense.

00:37:01.000 Well, that's the sad part.

00:37:02.000 That's what we don't have. 0.99

00:37:03.000 Think how depressing your very astute observation is, in the sense that the idea was we weren't gonna have a fucking monarchy here. 0.98

00:37:10.000 Yeah. 0.98

00:37:10.000 That was the whole point. 0.98

00:37:11.000 And now we elect a monarchy.

00:37:13.000 Yeah, yeah, that's the whole point, man.

00:37:15.000 And again, it's like, look, if you start playing the game, That you're the smart person in the room. 0.98

00:37:22.000 And that if people disagree with you, they must be dumb. 1.00

00:37:25.000 If people have different ideas than you, they must be stupid. 1.00

00:37:28.000 And then you start shaming them. 1.00

00:37:30.000 All you're doing is creating this, like, you're going to create a reaction to that.

00:37:35.000 And the reaction is going to be a celebration of every single thing with your great, vast, elite intelligence deriding, you know?

00:37:42.000 And so I think, you know, that's the problem.

00:37:44.000 It's like, it's just there's nothing worse Than when people who are legitimately smart, have read a bunch of fucking books, have got master's degrees, have not developed enough compassion to understand that just about every single person on the planet wants to be happy,

00:38:02.000 wants to have a full stomach, Doesn't want to hurt anybody and would run into a building on fire to save somebody. 0.95

00:38:08.000 Most everybody, I would say.

00:38:09.000 I would say at least 90%.

00:38:11.000 A large percentage.

00:38:12.000 A large percentage. 1.00

00:38:12.000 And these motherfuckers are shaming them and telling them they're idiots or they're stupid or this and that. 1.00

00:38:18.000 It's like, fuck you, man. 1.00

00:38:19.000 You don't know what these people came up through. 1.00

00:38:21.000 You don't know. 1.00

00:38:22.000 These people were born into houses filled with fucking methamphetamine smoke. 1.00

00:38:26.000 Whose parents were like, you know, absolutely fucking insane and they still managed to get out and get a job and have a fucking life and pay taxes. 1.00

00:38:34.000 And now your fucking ass is going to tell these people who didn't have the fucking trust fund that you had that got you into the fucking Ivy League University that they're fucking idiots. 1.00

00:38:43.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00

00:38:45.000 Stop. 1.00

00:38:45.000 They're not. 1.00

00:38:46.000 And then I'm shaming those people.

00:38:47.000 That's the problem.

00:38:48.000 The idea is like...

00:38:49.000 You're not shaming them.

00:38:50.000 You're just honestly illuminating their current situation.

00:38:54.000 I don't think it's shaming them.

00:38:56.000 It's time to let go of the whole snooty thing.

00:39:00.000 Also, on the other side, it's time to let go of every single one of these people must be burning candles to Moloch in their backyard thing, too.

00:39:08.000 Let's let go of all those stories for a second.

00:39:11.000 I'm not saying there aren't people burning candles to Moloch.

00:39:13.000 There definitely are.

00:39:14.000 I've never met one.

00:39:15.000 I've seen the Bohemian Grove video.

00:39:17.000 Is that Moloch?

00:39:18.000 Yes, that's Moloch the Owl God.

00:39:19.000 When Alex Jones and John Ronson...

00:39:22.000 Isn't it just an owl?

00:39:22.000 No, it's Moloch.

00:39:24.000 They were talking about it.

00:39:25.000 Is it Moloch?

00:39:25.000 Is that how you pronounce it?

00:39:26.000 Moloch the Owl God, according to Alex.

00:39:28.000 John Ronson and Alex Jones, they snuck into Bohemian Grove. 0.99

00:39:31.000 This was when everybody was saying it was all bullshit. 0.99

00:39:34.000 And I say this many times, and I'll say it some more. 0.99

00:39:37.000 Give me that later.

00:39:38.000 You got it, Fred.

00:39:39.000 Alex Jones, he's made some mistakes and some big ones.

00:39:42.000 But he's also... 0.98

00:39:44.000 Actually expose some real shit and he owns up to the mistakes he's made. 0.98

00:39:48.000 They're not good. 0.97

00:39:50.000 He doesn't think they're good.

00:39:52.000 There's a thing about finding conspiracies everywhere that's not good for your brain.

00:39:57.000 I really believe this.

00:39:59.000 I think that if you go looking for those things and that's all you look for and you look for them all the time, you can get real paranoid and real crazy. 0.97

00:40:05.000 And then there's also a bunch of people that are trying to stop you from doing that because you do expose some crazy shit. 0.85

00:40:10.000 You know, he was talking about Epstein a long time ago. 0.97

00:40:12.000 I know.

00:40:13.000 A long time ago. 0.99

00:40:14.000 He was saying there was a fucking island and they take all these rich politicians and some celebrities and they bang these kids. 0.99

00:40:20.000 And I was like, come on. 0.99

00:40:22.000 He was telling me this a long time ago.

00:40:24.000 So he's also the one who told me about Bohemian Grove.

00:40:27.000 Well, I actually watched it.

00:40:28.000 I think this tape was actually made before I met him.

00:40:30.000 So he went and snuck in to this place where former presidents go.

00:40:35.000 There's a photograph of Ronald Reagan with Herbert Walker Bush and a couple other people all standing around.

00:40:41.000 And it's like these are the people that used to hang out at this place and they would put on robes and they would worship an owl god and they would burn an effigy. 0.99

00:40:51.000 And Alex snuck in and made video footage of this shit. 0.99

00:40:54.000 And no one's denying that it's real. 1.00

00:40:56.000 This really did happen.

00:40:57.000 So they're in with these bankers and former presidents, and they're dressed like druids, and some guy brings over something that's an effigy that's supposed to be a body, a wrapped up effigy.

00:41:09.000 It's also a bunch of sticks in a blanket, but it's shaped like a body.

00:41:13.000 And they drop it on the fire, and they're all worshipping an owl god.

00:41:17.000 Why is that bad?

00:41:18.000 Imagine if you saw those, if that's what your business is, just finding those things.

00:41:21.000 How crazy do you think you get?

00:41:23.000 First of all, wait. 0.69

00:41:23.000 Then you add in vodka and head wounds. 0.69

00:41:26.000 Wait, wait, wait, hold on, wait.

00:41:27.000 Go to the vodka and head wounds part.

00:41:28.000 What do you mean?

00:41:29.000 It's Alph Jones.

00:41:30.000 Okay, I got you.

00:41:31.000 A lot of vodka and he had a bad head injury. 0.99

00:41:32.000 God damn it, man. 0.99

00:41:33.000 When I was in liberal arts school, man, there was this great teacher who changed my life, Sam Scovel. 0.99

00:41:38.000 And one of the things he taught was so beautiful.

00:41:41.000 He still teaches there.

00:41:41.000 One of the things he taught was...

00:41:43.000 Figure out a way to take in all information and then filter out the shit that's not real and keep the real stuff. 0.94

00:41:49.000 And like, you know, Alex Jones is like, let's, yeah. 0.94

00:41:53.000 Some of the stuff is real.

00:41:55.000 Take what's real and throw out the rest.

00:41:56.000 There's a good chunk of it that's real. 0.88

00:41:58.000 Like, I remember he was telling me that the government's using chemicals that are turning frogs gay.

00:42:02.000 I was like, what?

00:42:04.000 What are you talking about?

00:42:05.000 He goes, yes. 0.98

00:42:06.000 He goes, pesticides are turning frogs gay. 0.89

00:42:07.000 And I'm like, that can't be real.

00:42:09.000 No, there really is.

00:42:10.000 Is that true?

00:42:11.000 Yes.

00:42:11.000 There's pesticides that change frogs' genders.

00:42:14.000 What?

00:42:14.000 Yes.

00:42:15.000 Yes. 0.99

00:42:16.000 But some pesticide fucks with frogs' genders. 1.00

00:42:22.000 That sucks. 1.00

00:42:23.000 Maybe it doesn't. 0.97

00:42:24.000 I mean, depends on the frog.

00:42:25.000 Maybe it's awesome for the frog. 0.99

00:42:26.000 Maybe frogs don't give a fuck because they've never been taught homophobia. 0.99

00:42:29.000 Why would they care? 1.00

00:42:29.000 They don't care who they fuck. 1.00

00:42:31.000 But there's a real thing that... 0.99

00:42:32.000 See if you can find that.

00:42:34.000 It's a pesticide that has some sort of an effect, an unintended effect on frogs' genders.

00:42:41.000 Dude, that's another thing that people don't talk about.

00:42:43.000 Pesticides that have been used in golf courses and there's people who live around those.

00:42:48.000 That's a chemical dump. 0.99

00:42:50.000 Yeah, golf courses are fucked up. 0.99

00:42:52.000 Pesticide atrazine can turn male frogs into females. 1.00

00:42:55.000 So this is a fucking pesticide that changes the gender, or should I say the sex? 0.99

00:43:01.000 Is it the same thing? 1.00

00:43:02.000 What?

00:43:03.000 Sex and gender? 1.00

00:43:04.000 Hey, I'm not getting sucked into that fucking black hole, Rogan. 1.00

00:43:07.000 You can keep that shit to yourself. 1.00

00:43:08.000 But hey, I'll get sucked into another black hole. 1.00

00:43:11.000 Isn't that crazy, though?

00:43:12.000 Well, yeah.

00:43:13.000 Before we get into that stuff, I want to say this real quick.

00:43:17.000 Is that camera on me?

00:43:19.000 Friends at the Bohemian Grove.

00:43:22.000 Future friends, I should say.

00:43:23.000 I just want you to know, I don't know much about you.

00:43:25.000 I know Alex Jones, you know, probably on vodka drinks.

00:43:30.000 I don't think he was then.

00:43:31.000 I think he was sober.

00:43:32.000 He started drinking after all this. 0.50

00:43:33.000 Please don't fuck this up.

00:43:34.000 Sorry, sorry.

00:43:35.000 He had an infiltrator.

00:43:36.000 Look, I went to a summer camp.

00:43:39.000 We had bonfires.

00:43:40.000 We wore robes.

00:43:41.000 I mean, not like maybe what you do.

00:43:43.000 I just want to say...

00:43:44.000 Hey, come on. 0.77

00:43:46.000 Invite me, please.

00:43:47.000 I won't tell anybody anything.

00:43:49.000 I've heard you guys are pretty awesome.

00:43:50.000 Actually, what I've heard is the idea was to get a bunch of hardcore neocons together and then mix some artists in, in the hopes that, like, having, like, brushing shoulders with artists would in some way, shape, or form loosen some people up a little bit.

00:44:04.000 And I've also heard you have a tram that connects campsites there to other campsites, meaning you just get in the tram and suddenly you're hanging out with Dick Cheney.

00:44:13.000 Listen, I won't tell anybody.

00:44:15.000 I got a podcast.

00:44:16.000 I won't even tell Joe.

00:44:17.000 Let me in.

00:44:17.000 I'll worship Moloch.

00:44:20.000 I won't worship Moloch if it means hurting people. 0.99

00:44:22.000 But I don't understand why people are upset about fucking... 1.00

00:44:25.000 By the way, that's that fucking video. 1.00

00:44:28.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00

00:44:28.000 What's wrong with worshiping? 1.00

00:44:30.000 Nothing.

00:44:30.000 You're getting so excited.

00:44:32.000 This is the thing that I get confused about here.

00:44:33.000 Okay.

00:44:34.000 It's like...

00:44:35.000 In our country, we've got people who are Christian.

00:44:39.000 Yes.

00:44:40.000 And that's a beautiful thing.

00:44:41.000 And I do love Jesus.

00:44:42.000 I was reading the book of Mark today regarding the parable of the sower.

00:44:45.000 But that being said, I don't think it's fair necessarily to tell people they can't worship an owl or burn an effigy in front of an owl in some kind of symbolic, magical ritual that represents the disintegration of your negative energy or whatever it may be.

00:45:00.000 I really don't know.

00:45:01.000 But to me, that's the other problem that's happening right now.

00:45:05.000 Superstition is running rampant.

00:45:07.000 I'm friends with lots of witches.

00:45:09.000 I know a few Satanists.

00:45:10.000 I know a few people who are under the occult.

00:45:11.000 And I don't know a single one of them that would tolerate child abuse. 0.82

00:45:15.000 I don't know a single one that wouldn't kill somebody. 0.99

00:45:18.000 Some of them would kill people.

00:45:20.000 If they thought they were hurting kids, and make it so that nobody found the body. 0.98

00:45:24.000 Some of the Satanists I know, they would kill someone probably.

00:45:29.000 I don't know for sure.

00:45:30.000 I'm not trying to throw any Satanists under the bus, but I'm just saying like this idea that we can't have alternate Pagan religions in our country without immediately being associated with human sacrifice or child abuse, I think that goes against the American spirit.

00:45:45.000 It's like, look, because people don't want to subscribe to your particular very popular global religion doesn't necessarily implicate them in something that is truly a horror, which is human trafficking.

00:45:58.000 So to me, this is the problem.

00:46:00.000 It's like, man, we got to be a little bit more nuanced in our conceptualization of these people.

00:46:05.000 Again, I don't know what's going on at the fucking Bohemian Grove, but from what I've heard, it's basically a summer camp for billionaires where they try to get artists in there to loosen them up a little bit. 0.86

00:46:16.000 That's what I've heard. 0.97

00:46:16.000 I could be wrong. 0.97

00:46:17.000 Who told you this? 0.99

00:46:19.000 I honestly can't fucking say. 0.99

00:46:21.000 Hmm. 0.97

00:46:24.000 Hmm.

00:46:24.000 Interesting.

00:46:25.000 Look, man, I don't know.

00:46:26.000 Have you seen the video of Bohemian Grove?

00:46:29.000 Have you seen it?

00:46:30.000 The ritual in front of the owl guy.

00:46:32.000 Have you seen it?

00:46:33.000 Yeah.

00:46:34.000 Dude, come with me to Burning Man.

00:46:36.000 And you will see that every 50 feet.

00:46:39.000 Look, I don't think it's that big of a deal.

00:46:41.000 I really don't.

00:46:43.000 If it involves hurting kids, it's a big deal. 0.99

00:46:45.000 And if these motherfuckers are doing anything that involves human sacrifice, hurting human beings, in any application of that, then it's the worst thing on Earth, and I'm so sorry that I said anything about it. 0.99

00:46:58.000 I don't think that's what this is. 0.99

00:47:02.000 Obviously, what we're seeing is not that.

00:47:04.000 We don't know what else happens.

00:47:06.000 But what you're seeing is them burning sticks in front of this owl god.

00:47:10.000 And it's like this crazy speech they're giving while it's going on.

00:47:15.000 It's really weird.

00:47:16.000 Hey, can we hear some of it?

00:47:18.000 The speech?

00:47:19.000 I don't know where the speech is in the video.

00:47:21.000 I found another video where they stabilized the footage.

00:47:24.000 Oh.

00:47:25.000 But I mean, before this, nobody really believed it.

00:47:30.000 Listen.

00:47:49.000 And now they're lighting the effigy on fire and everybody's cheering.

00:47:57.000 It looks fine.

00:47:58.000 Stanley Kubrick had this quote once to Nicole Kidman, I think it was, and they were working on Eyes Wide Shut.

00:48:06.000 See if you can find what she said about the elites.

00:48:13.000 I know I saved it.

00:48:14.000 I can find it if I have a chance to look at my laptop.

00:48:17.000 It was something about him talking about the powers that run the world and that they all have something on each other and that's how they all can stay together.

00:48:27.000 They all compromise each other.

00:48:29.000 That's what Skull and Bones was about.

00:48:31.000 So he had a much more concise Yeah, man.

00:48:34.000 A quote on that, but when you see something like that, you go, well, maybe it's like fun that they do it that nobody knows they do it.

00:48:40.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:48:41.000 Yeah.

00:48:41.000 Like maybe it's like one of those rituals where you get together, your dad thinks it's hilarious, and you both put your hoods on, you go out there and you burn the owl, or you burn the sticks in front of the owl.

00:48:50.000 And what's fun is that you're not supposed to be doing it, and it's a secret, but nothing really is happening.

00:48:56.000 That's also on the table. 0.95

00:48:58.000 It's possible, but it's fucking weird, man. 0.96

00:49:03.000 That was weird. 0.98

00:49:04.000 Imagine if there was no Catholic Church.

00:49:06.000 Imagine if you are a billionaire.

00:49:08.000 That's what you're doing with your weekend?

00:49:09.000 But imagine if there was no Catholic Church and there was one video of a mass. 1.00

00:49:14.000 We would be like, what the fuck? 1.00

00:49:16.000 That's fucked up! 1.00

00:49:18.000 Imagine any religious ceremony if there was only one version of it. 1.00

00:49:21.000 Because I'm not trying to reduce it to summer camp fun or even fraternity games.

00:49:26.000 Who knows what it is, right?

00:49:28.000 You can know what it is.

00:49:30.000 They'd have to tell us.

00:49:31.000 But we just see something crazy.

00:49:34.000 But it's not evil.

00:49:36.000 I mean, what is it?

00:49:38.000 Well, for me, it's a question mark.

00:49:39.000 I don't really know.

00:49:40.000 I know that my tendency whenever I have a question mark is to assign malevolence to it just out of a basic kind of weakness in my own bias.

00:49:50.000 If I don't know what a thing is, like when you're waiting for the doctor to call regarding some scan they just did on you, if you have the slightest fear of death or any kind of bias in you, then that space in between when you Maybe we're overlooking this. 0.90

00:50:05.000 Maybe it's like their version of renaissance fair and people just want to escape reality and pretend that they live with Moloch the owl god and throw a fucking hood over your head and yes please and peace be with you.

00:50:16.000 Yeah I mean it could be some kind of like pagan celebration. 0.95

00:50:21.000 Could be right?

00:50:21.000 You know, and if you look back at like the history of paganism or hedonism, Terence McKenna does such a great job talking about the Elucidian mysteries and the, you know, all these like things that aren't really quite as accessible as the main religions of the world.

00:50:35.000 All the religions of the world, they have this beautiful...

00:50:40.000 Quality in them, depending on the religion, and generally one of the qualities that's so beautiful is a mechanism of self-forgiveness and a mechanism of purification, a general assessment of the human condition as being somewhat depraved.

00:50:54.000 The puking in ayahuasca, you're purging yourself from your darkness.

00:50:59.000 The confession booth in Catholicism, maybe you could say in Gnosticism like true Gnosis, or in Buddhism like connecting with the It goes on and on.

00:51:12.000 There's a way for us to ritualistically create, if you want to be a pure scientific materialist, a beautiful placebo effect.

00:51:24.000 That gets you to drop some of your neurotic qualities or at the very least reset your intention to make the world a better place. 0.97

00:51:31.000 And anything, whatever that, I don't care what the fuck it is, whatever it may be, if that's what it's all about is a recognition like, man, you beat yourself up every day. 0.98

00:51:40.000 You're so hard on yourself. 0.99

00:51:41.000 You beat yourself up for all the shit you did in the past. 1.00

00:51:44.000 And we live in a world right now where there's not much tolerance. 1.00

00:51:47.000 There's not much forgiveness. 0.99

00:51:49.000 And anything that allows a kind of like steam valve From which all that shit can get released. 0.98

00:51:57.000 So from this day forward, you're born again. 0.99

00:51:59.000 You're brand new.

00:52:00.000 I don't care if it's an owl.

00:52:02.000 Man, if you think that's crazy, look at like Main Street Disneyland any night. 0.99

00:52:08.000 That's some crazy shit to watch too. 0.98

00:52:10.000 And some people's entire lives, I'm not being... 0.99

00:52:12.000 Like, change from like having a great night anywhere.

00:52:17.000 So, you know, to me it's like ritual is not scary to me.

00:52:21.000 What's scary to me, though, is anything that objectifies humans, enslaves humans.

00:52:30.000 It hurts kids.

00:52:31.000 Yeah, human sacrifice.

00:52:33.000 Any of that stuff.

00:52:34.000 And if that's what's really happening there, I truly don't know, then I completely apologize for any defense of it.

00:52:39.000 It's just sticks.

00:52:41.000 The question is, was it always just sticks?

00:52:43.000 Did it used to be people?

00:52:45.000 Did they used to sacrifice a person?

00:52:47.000 Did they stop doing it at one point in time?

00:52:49.000 One widely cited Nicole Kidman interview was made up by the fake news site, News Punch. 1.00

00:52:54.000 You sons of bitches! 1.00

00:52:56.000 God damn it, they got me. 1.00

00:52:57.000 They got you. 1.00

00:52:58.000 Does it say what the quote is?

00:53:00.000 Yeah.

00:53:01.000 What is the quote?

00:53:01.000 He said that Hollywood's run by pedophiles or something.

00:53:04.000 I found the Reddit page where it was put up. 0.99

00:53:06.000 God damn, they got me. 0.99

00:53:07.000 Glad I asked you. 1.00

00:53:08.000 Hey, you want to see something real creepy?

00:53:10.000 Jamie, may I ask you to look something up?

00:53:12.000 Look up that there's a video of a van that was actually used for human trafficking.

00:53:19.000 I saw that. 1.00

00:53:19.000 That shit is chilling. 1.00

00:53:21.000 Terrifying. 1.00

00:53:22.000 Chilling.

00:53:22.000 And it's like, to me, it's like, man, if we're going to be...

00:53:26.000 Anybody who is at the helm of the ship that's fighting those motherfuckers right now deserves medals. 0.98

00:53:33.000 And I hope that they never stop what they're doing. 0.98

00:53:35.000 I just want them to be very precise in their attacks.

00:53:39.000 That's all.

00:53:39.000 Don't dilute your position by getting caught up in something.

00:53:43.000 And again, I'm already going to get attacked for this saying, like, Doug, it works for the blah, blah.

00:53:47.000 I don't.

00:53:48.000 I don't.

00:53:49.000 I'm a Buddhist.

00:53:50.000 And I go to Ram Dass retreats and Burning Man.

00:53:52.000 And if they invited me to the Bohemian Grove, I'd go.

00:53:55.000 And if I went there and I saw that...

00:53:56.000 I was going to say, Stanley Kubrick can keep a secret.

00:53:59.000 We can, too.

00:54:01.000 Are you saying you would go to the Grove with me?

00:54:03.000 Yes!

00:54:05.000 I wouldn't tell anybody.

00:54:06.000 But you know if you and I were invited there and we saw anything happening that was anything to do with like what people...

00:54:12.000 I would think it would be a trap and they would be setting us up. 0.96

00:54:15.000 They would put on like some sort of fake thing just to make us look like fools. 0.96

00:54:18.000 So we talk about it on our podcast. 0.84

00:54:21.000 Do you know, man, if we ever do a movie together, that's the movie.

00:54:24.000 Like, it should be all of your friends going to the Bohemian, get invited to the Bohemian group.

00:54:27.000 Exactly, right?

00:54:28.000 Like, I become friends with some guy who's like a banker who really likes comedy.

00:54:32.000 Yeah.

00:54:33.000 Right?

00:54:33.000 And then this guy tells you, he gets drunk one night, like, I know the Illuminati.

00:54:37.000 They're real.

00:54:37.000 The Bilderberg group, it's real.

00:54:39.000 Like, what?

00:54:40.000 Yeah, man.

00:54:41.000 Jekyll Island.

00:54:42.000 They made the Federal Institute.

00:54:43.000 It's not even from America, man.

00:54:45.000 And you're like, what?

00:54:46.000 What?

00:54:47.000 And then this guy starts unraveling the tale of America.

00:54:51.000 Can I tell you something crazy?

00:54:53.000 The Federal Reserve.

00:54:53.000 Yeah.

00:54:54.000 People in my family used to own parts of Jekyll Island.

00:54:57.000 Okay, tell the story of Jekyll Island, because that's what I'm talking about if people don't know it.

00:55:00.000 Well, here's the problem.

00:55:01.000 I don't know the story.

00:55:02.000 I have like two paragraphs in my head memorized.

00:55:06.000 I remember hearing people in my family had some claim on land there and that they sold it.

00:55:10.000 And since then, I was just kind of resentful because it's like they sold it for nothing. 0.98

00:55:14.000 And if they'd held on to it, I would be at the fucking Bohemian Grove. 0.89

00:55:21.000 And so, Jekyll Island's supposed to be the place where they invented the Federal Reserve, right? 0.98

00:55:27.000 Isn't that it?

00:55:27.000 There's a great hotel.

00:55:28.000 Is that it, Jamie?

00:55:30.000 What does it say?

00:55:31.000 Listen, all disclaimer.

00:55:33.000 I forgot where to look. 1.00

00:55:34.000 All three of us are morons. 1.00

00:55:35.000 Yes! 1.00

00:55:36.000 Okay, this is not...

00:55:37.000 That's one thing that drives me crazy.

00:55:39.000 This is one of the things about silencing people that are crazy online. 0.83

00:55:43.000 I can tell when someone's crazy. 0.83

00:55:45.000 And part of someone being crazy is you see these crazy people and you go, oh, I think they might be crazy.

00:55:50.000 And then you look into it and you go, yeah, none of what they're saying makes sense. 0.99

00:55:54.000 They actually are crazy, but damn, that was pretty close. 0.98

00:55:56.000 Yeah, dude. 0.99

00:55:58.000 The thing about people saying things that other people disagree with when they want to silence those people is you don't think that other people are as smart as you.

00:56:05.000 You're thinking that's going to work on other people.

00:56:08.000 If someone's saying that the earth is flat and there's lizard people that control the sunrise, you'd go, okay. 1.00

00:56:15.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:56:17.000 It wouldn't work.

00:56:18.000 So why not let someone say it?

00:56:20.000 So if someone says it, it doesn't work on you.

00:56:22.000 But what are you worried about?

00:56:24.000 You're worried it's going to work on somebody else.

00:56:25.000 That's what you're worried about.

00:56:28.000 That's the weird thing about COVID, because it's the one thing where you're not allowed to do that anymore.

00:56:34.000 Because if you do anything that goes against the government bylines, anything that goes against what the World Health Organization thinks you should do or CDC thinks you should do, you get kicked off of YouTube.

00:56:45.000 You get silenced.

00:56:46.000 Everybody gets removed.

00:56:47.000 Whether you're right or wrong, it's the one thing where you can't talk crazy.

00:56:51.000 You can talk crazy about the Earth being hollow.

00:56:53.000 You could talk about beings that are made out of light that fly in and out of our consciousness, and that's responsible for all of our ideas.

00:57:01.000 And you could talk about how there's an application that's coming in 2023. It's right now being vetted by the NSA to make sure that we can use it so we can communicate with the aliens.

00:57:09.000 You can have all these wacko videos where you're making shit up and no one cares. 0.97

00:57:12.000 But if you say that masks don't help, And what we need to do is get healthier. 0.98

00:57:17.000 They'll remove you from YouTube.

00:57:19.000 Well, that's the fire in a crowded theater thing.

00:57:21.000 You can't yell fire in a crowded theater.

00:57:23.000 The problem with it is, to me, is I have gone through every single stage of grief over YouTube.

00:57:31.000 Mask is a bad analogy.

00:57:33.000 Maybe a better analogy is you can open up businesses, as long as you do it carefully.

00:57:38.000 I used to love YouTube, man.

00:57:40.000 I used to love it.

00:57:41.000 I still love it.

00:57:41.000 What I loved about it in the old days, I still love it.

00:57:44.000 I still go on every day.

00:57:45.000 But what I loved about it in the old days is what you're saying.

00:57:47.000 No one's putting a cork in the champagne bottle.

00:57:50.000 It was wild.

00:57:50.000 It was a museum of madness.

00:57:53.000 And what was even better is the algorithm was working in your favor.

00:57:56.000 So it's like, punch in Hollow Earth?

00:57:59.000 Yes.

00:57:59.000 That's going to take you...

00:58:00.000 All the way to like some crazy, deep shit. 0.99

00:58:03.000 And never once in all my explorations in the early days of YouTube was I like, this could be real. 0.99

00:58:09.000 It was more like, wow, look at how all the different versions of reality that people are processing.

00:58:15.000 And it was a joy.

00:58:17.000 But I think what happened probably is like people realize like, God, like what we've got, like you talk about this sometimes, man, the nightmare when, and it will happen when primates Figure how to use friction to make fire.

00:58:34.000 You talk about this.

00:58:35.000 Yes.

00:58:35.000 And that's a nightmare for the planet.

00:58:37.000 You think the fucking shit's bad now. 1.00

00:58:39.000 Wait till the chimps figure out guns. 1.00

00:58:41.000 Yeah.

00:58:42.000 Just fire.

00:58:43.000 Just fire.

00:58:44.000 Just figure out how to make their own fire.

00:58:45.000 Think of the beginning, the proto-hominid shift into figuring out...

00:58:52.000 That's a really good point.

00:58:53.000 You know, this is trouble.

00:58:54.000 It's a really good point.

00:58:55.000 Think of how many people died in the beginning of discovering fire.

00:59:00.000 Oh my god.

00:59:00.000 How many experiments were done with fire?

00:59:03.000 How many things were just set on fire?

00:59:05.000 How many people just burned...

00:59:06.000 I can eat it!

00:59:07.000 I bet you can eat it!

00:59:08.000 Let me eat it!

00:59:09.000 I'll get its energy in my body! 1.00

00:59:11.000 Holy fuck! 1.00

00:59:12.000 He melted his face off! 1.00

00:59:13.000 You know so similarly like with the internet we have this new fire and like people who are like in the conduits of the fire or I think they're they're having this really rotten come to Jesus moment where they're like because I think a lot of these especially if you look in the Silicon Valley these people are freaks the early day like the people making technology they're nuts I've seen you that Steve Jobs thing with him in a commune or whatever these people are fucking crazy but I think they're recognizing that like The 0.95

00:59:46.000 internet is the new fire.

00:59:47.000 Yeah, and they're starting to understand that because of them, because of their intentional manipulative coding, because of their deep study of BF Skinner and behaviorism, they've produced this hyper-seductive, semi-sentient information dispersal device that is driving people who don't have We're good to go.

01:00:17.000 We're good to go. 0.99

01:00:34.000 Google and YouTube and as much as like, you know, and I do think censorship is fucked. 0.86

01:00:38.000 I would hate to be in anybody's position there because on one hand, you're looking at like a very liberal, very beautiful idea, which is like everyone should be allowed to say whatever they want to say. 0.93

01:00:49.000 And then it's meeting like, well, but what about these hyper charismatic, seductive people who like Hitler?

01:00:58.000 You know what I mean?

01:00:59.000 So now you run into this terrible place of like, and also we know that there's people who don't quite have the ability to discern what's real from what's not.

01:01:08.000 But we allow, this is my beef, we allow some of that because we allow evangelists.

01:01:15.000 I heard Robert Tilden on one of his shows.

01:01:17.000 He goes, every time you write a check to me, Satan gets a black eye.

01:01:24.000 It's good!

01:01:25.000 Dude, it was in my act for a while.

01:01:27.000 I was like, where's my checkbook? 1.00

01:01:29.000 You Satan, you son of a bitch! 1.00

01:01:32.000 Dude, it's... 1.00

01:01:32.000 Imagine you could steal money that way. 1.00

01:01:35.000 It's...

01:01:35.000 Look, man, I don't...

01:01:36.000 But you know what I'm saying?

01:01:37.000 Yeah, I do know exactly what you're saying, and it's like this type of con artistry.

01:01:42.000 Also, cigarettes.

01:01:43.000 Oh, you know, it's like this type of con artistry.

01:01:46.000 Generally, it seems like there's some kind of grandfather clause on specific styles of con...

01:01:52.000 Of thievery and murder.

01:01:53.000 Yeah.

01:01:55.000 They know they're killing people.

01:01:57.000 Imagine if you had bubblegum that killed a half a million people a year.

01:02:00.000 It's like bubblegum, but people are just dying. 1.00

01:02:02.000 Stop selling that shit. 1.00

01:02:03.000 What the fuck are you doing? 1.00

01:02:05.000 People have a right to chew their bubblegum. 1.00

01:02:07.000 A lot of people like bubbles. 0.82

01:02:09.000 Imagine if that's all it was.

01:02:10.000 It's like you chewing bubbles makes you happy and everybody's dying of cancer.

01:02:13.000 And this company's making $500 billion a year or something like that.

01:02:17.000 How much do they make on cigarettes?

01:02:19.000 Yeah.

01:02:20.000 Let's guess.

01:02:21.000 Let's guess.

01:02:21.000 What do you think the annual...

01:02:23.000 By the way, I want to say this before.

01:02:25.000 This is a box of cigars, okay?

01:02:27.000 Mike Binder gave me that and he gave me that one over there.

01:02:29.000 Another box of cigars.

01:02:30.000 I'm not anti-tobacco in any way, shape, or form.

01:02:32.000 I'm a pro-free choice person.

01:02:34.000 You absolutely should be able to smoke cigarettes.

01:02:37.000 And I think you absolutely should be able to sell them because I don't want to roll my own. 0.98

01:02:40.000 And if I want a cigarette as a grown fucking man, I want to be able to have a cigarette. 0.98

01:02:45.000 But... 1.00

01:02:46.000 Cigarettes do kill a half a million people in this country every year.

01:02:51.000 Yeah.

01:02:51.000 Or they're gonna die anyway, right?

01:02:54.000 Cigarettes kill them early or they die directly because of Diseases that you can get from smoking cigarettes.

01:03:02.000 And their kids get sick.

01:03:04.000 Dude, the worst, man.

01:03:05.000 Kids that live in...

01:03:06.000 Greg Fitzsimmons, he has lung problems to this day because his parents chain smoked and they lived in Massachusetts, so it's cold.

01:03:12.000 My mom did, but she quit when I was really young.

01:03:14.000 Did you ever...

01:03:15.000 She quit when I was like six, I think.

01:03:15.000 Were you in the car with her when she smoked?

01:03:17.000 I must have been.

01:03:19.000 With the windows up?

01:03:20.000 Well, we lived in New Jersey, so it was cold in the winter, I'm sure it was.

01:03:24.000 I don't think she smoked in the car with her kids, though.

01:03:26.000 Dude, do you mind if I have a little more of this? 0.99

01:03:28.000 I don't fucking have a drink at all, man. 0.94

01:03:29.000 It's so good. 0.97

01:03:30.000 I remember...

01:03:34.000 Fletcher, North Carolina, middle of winter.

01:03:36.000 You'd go down and wait for the bus.

01:03:38.000 My friend, Jimmy Fink, I think it was Jimmy Fink, his mom would, like, let us get in her car to wait for the bus.

01:03:45.000 It was wonderful, very sweet.

01:03:47.000 But also, I think, and I'm sorry, Jimmy, if you're out there.

01:03:50.000 I know we haven't talked in a long time.

01:03:51.000 I still love you, though.

01:03:52.000 But, like, and I'm sorry if it's not you and I'm getting confused here, but the, I just remember she smoked and we, like, there was smoke in the car.

01:03:58.000 My dad smoked.

01:04:00.000 I would ride in the car with him on trips and he would smoke and you'd breathe in the smoke.

01:04:06.000 And again, this is always the problem, which is clearly there has to be some regulatory principle in the world if there are people who steal watches.

01:04:18.000 That means there's going to be groups of people who get together and talk about better ways to steal watches.

01:04:23.000 If there's groups of people who get together and talk about better ways to steal watches, and then we create a way for them to form a thing called a corporation.

01:04:30.000 You know what I mean?

01:04:31.000 You need to regulate that.

01:04:33.000 That's why we need regulation.

01:04:35.000 But then the problem is, who does the regulating?

01:04:38.000 And what's the incentive for you to regulate?

01:04:41.000 Is there a financial incentive?

01:04:43.000 Do the regulators get paid an exorbitant amount of money?

01:04:46.000 Let's say you and I start a vape pen company that is a nicotine vape pen.

01:04:51.000 I like what you're thinking.

01:04:52.000 And then we start pouring money into people who are against tobacco, knowing if we can make tobacco illegal but keep the vape pens legal, we're going to become the new tobacco!

01:05:00.000 But here's the thing about vape pens.

01:05:02.000 This is the real thing about vape pens.

01:05:04.000 Some of them are not good for you at all.

01:05:07.000 They're real bad for you.

01:05:09.000 And there's a connection they're saying now between COVID and kids that vape.

01:05:14.000 Kids that vape dying of COVID are getting serious COVID problems, but it makes sense.

01:05:19.000 I have a friend who's got a kid that sucks on one of them things all day long, just vapes constantly.

01:05:28.000 Kids vape.

01:05:29.000 And these kids that vape all the time, like the oils that you're taking into your lungs, that's not healthy.

01:05:37.000 The idea that it's not cigarettes so it's healthy, No.

01:05:41.000 There's a lot of evidence that points to some of those companies that make those oils.

01:05:46.000 They don't do it in a way where, you know, there's like different kinds of oils.

01:05:50.000 Yeah.

01:05:50.000 And they have different reactions to the heat.

01:05:52.000 And some of them are like, am I saying this right?

01:05:55.000 Let's check on this.

01:05:56.000 What is the problem with the different types of vapes?

01:05:59.000 Because I think there was one type of oil that they're using, you know, because they have to somehow or another mix.

01:06:05.000 The same with the marijuana ones.

01:06:07.000 You have to mix.

01:06:08.000 This stuff with the THC and some sort of chemical, but it's different.

01:06:13.000 You can do it organically.

01:06:14.000 I know they've done it with coconut oil.

01:06:19.000 I know they've done it with things like that.

01:06:20.000 It's the same way with hash, man.

01:06:22.000 I think it's like the way people make hash varies.

01:06:25.000 In some people, there's a healthy way to make it.

01:06:28.000 Obviously, the way using the most chemicals is the cheapest.

01:06:32.000 There's certain types of hash that you, I think, are derived, and again, my friends out there, look, I don't know, but it's something like butane.

01:06:38.000 Someone told me this at a marijuana store.

01:06:41.000 I can't remember what, but yeah, man, it's like cheaper.

01:06:44.000 The concern is the oil.

01:06:45.000 Like, what kind of oil?

01:06:46.000 I know there's one guy that was selling them with MCT oil.

01:06:49.000 Okay, here it is.

01:06:59.000 Jesus Christ.

01:07:03.000 Okay, so that was the speculation.

01:07:07.000 That people are using, like if you try to cook, okay? 0.63

01:07:11.000 And you try to like sear a steak and you do it with olive oil, you're gonna fuck it up.

01:07:15.000 Because olive oil, it's not like something that you really sear something with.

01:07:21.000 Like you put olive oil in, you don't want to get it that hot.

01:07:23.000 Yeah.

01:07:24.000 Olive oil is more something that you'd like to saute with, but other oils like avocado oil or beef fat, that stuff is amazing because you can get it really fucking hot and it has a very, very high temperature where it turns to smoke.

01:07:39.000 So it's healthier for you, the idea.

01:07:41.000 So if you're misting this stuff into your lungs, you don't want it burnt.

01:07:45.000 Right.

01:07:45.000 You want something that's more...

01:07:46.000 So I would imagine if you're using these cheap... 0.93

01:07:49.000 This is, again, I'm a moron, I'm not a scientist, but we're doing science. 0.93

01:07:52.000 Let's do science. 0.99

01:07:53.000 If you're using a vape pen with some really shitty canola oil and you're getting that burnt spray inside your lungs, that could be terrible for you.

01:08:01.000 Terrible. 1.00

01:08:02.000 You got some fucking GMO corn syrup bullshit in your lungs. 1.00

01:08:06.000 Yeah, you know the haunting thing, man? 1.00

01:08:08.000 You go to a pharmacy, right?

01:08:09.000 And you watch as the pharmacist dispenses the drugs, how careful he is, right?

01:08:14.000 They are so careful in their administration of these pills, because they know if for one second you give someone Xanax when they were supposed to get penicillin, you killed somebody, right?

01:08:25.000 So you have to be very careful.

01:08:26.000 But meanwhile, look at us right now, Joe.

01:08:29.000 Did you do a test on that bottle of booze?

01:08:32.000 Are these...

01:08:33.000 I didn't even...

01:08:33.000 Honestly, it was embarrassing.

01:08:35.000 I'm like, I don't know how to light this blunt.

01:08:36.000 But then, like, I'm smoking something called dadgrass. 0.99

01:08:39.000 I don't know what's in this shit. 0.99

01:08:40.000 I don't do any studies here. 0.99

01:08:42.000 That's for people who love Steely Dan.

01:08:45.000 I do love Steely Dan!

01:08:47.000 I do too! 0.99

01:08:47.000 They have some great fucking songs. 0.99

01:08:49.000 You know what I mean? 0.99

01:08:50.000 I'm saying, like, the general, like, in America and anywhere, the general sense is, I'm gonna eat it if you give it to me, especially if it's in a colorful box.

01:08:59.000 Right.

01:08:59.000 And then you're like, it must be okay.

01:09:01.000 And the problem is, is, like, sometimes it's not okay.

01:09:04.000 Look at thalamide, man.

01:09:06.000 Like, you know, look at, like, the big moments in history when it was shown, like, actually, sometimes the stuff we sell you...

01:09:13.000 Is that thalidomide?

01:09:14.000 Thalidomide.

01:09:15.000 Thalidomide.

01:09:16.000 That's the stuff that gave kids birth defects. 1.00

01:09:18.000 Defects, yeah. 0.99

01:09:18.000 Or what was that radioactive shit they painted on watches? 0.99

01:09:21.000 Oh my god, dude. 0.99

01:09:22.000 We did a whole show where we talked about all the diseases that people got from iridium.

01:09:26.000 Was that what it was, Jamie?

01:09:28.000 What was the radium?

01:09:29.000 Radium?

01:09:30.000 Iridium?

01:09:31.000 They were using it for all kinds of things and people's faces were rotting off.

01:09:35.000 Yeah.

01:09:35.000 Literally, they have holes in their face.

01:09:38.000 They were painting it on watches because it would glow.

01:09:40.000 It was cool looking.

01:09:41.000 So similarly, it's like...

01:09:43.000 They were using it for makeup, I think.

01:09:44.000 Yeah.

01:09:45.000 And here we have the internet. 1.00

01:09:46.000 Here we have the fucking internet. 0.98

01:09:48.000 Suddenly we have a hyper, a way to super connect with every single person on the planet, but not just connect with every person on the planet. 0.99

01:09:55.000 We have an artificial intelligence based on a neural network, I don't understand how it works, suggesting who you should connect with You know what I mean?

01:10:05.000 It's like, is the internet, the technological thalidomide, are we looking at- I think so.

01:10:12.000 Is that what we're dealing with right now?

01:10:14.000 I think we're on a spaceship and we haven't quite figured out how to slow it down or where the brakes are or how to go left or right.

01:10:20.000 But the spaceship is being propelled by thoughts and ideas and social media and world events and drugs and sex and politics and power and control and it's all just hurling through space and while it's all happened we haven't quite figured out where the brakes are or what's the best way to be Harmonious with each other. 0.89

01:10:40.000 So we're all in this constant battle for control thinking that once we get in control, we're gonna set this fucking ship straight and everybody's gonna be cool. 0.66

01:10:49.000 We're gonna be- finally we're gonna get along because your side won, but you're still gonna have half the fucking country that hates you, half the country that doesn't agree with you, half the country that has to like be really tolerant in order to engage you in any of your ideas and admit that you're right, 0.67

01:11:05.000 right? 0.97

01:11:05.000 And this is what we're doing. 0.97

01:11:07.000 And it's not real.

01:11:08.000 It's not real.

01:11:08.000 I don't think it's real.

01:11:09.000 I think a lot of the people that have ideas in one way, if they could just talk to people...

01:11:14.000 In the realm of the area where they have disagreement, I bet they could work it out.

01:11:20.000 I think the problem is more people not talking than anything.

01:11:23.000 Joe, tell me about the spaceship idea some more.

01:11:27.000 Knowing you like I know you, I wonder if you're saying that metaphorically?

01:11:32.000 It is metaphorically, but it's also actual.

01:11:35.000 We are on a spaceship, whether we like it or not. 1.00

01:11:38.000 We're spinning a thousand miles an hour, and we're driving through infinity at a pace that if it was small and it passed by you, you would go, holy fuck! 1.00

01:11:49.000 If the Earth was the size of a baseball, and it whipped by you in real time, the way it's moving through the universe, you would be like, FUCK! That's what the Earth's doing. 1.00

01:12:02.000 But the Earth is huge.

01:12:04.000 It's huge, and yet it's tiny.

01:12:06.000 And it's surrounded by things that are enormous.

01:12:10.000 You've got a sun that's a million times bigger than us.

01:12:12.000 Just a fireball in the sky that all life on Earth depends on.

01:12:18.000 A very clear space between Earth and the sun.

01:12:21.000 A perfect balance.

01:12:24.000 Perfect balance between this unstoppable heat.

01:12:27.000 Just keep the water melted.

01:12:29.000 Don't boil it, man!

01:12:31.000 And we're hurling through infinity.

01:12:34.000 And while we're doing that, we're trying to pick who gets to be the leader to steal your tax money.

01:12:38.000 There you go.

01:12:39.000 We're trying to tell you you can't go to a beauty shop because I don't want you getting a cough. 1.00

01:12:42.000 That's right.

01:12:42.000 We're trying to tell people, stay home.

01:12:45.000 Stay home. 0.98

01:12:46.000 Trump's trying to kill America. 0.99

01:12:48.000 Yep. 0.99

01:12:48.000 It's the wrong approach. 0.99

01:12:51.000 The approach they should make should be all about positivity.

01:12:57.000 You know, everybody who's voting knows who Trump is.

01:13:01.000 Everybody knows about the riots.

01:13:03.000 Everybody knows all those things.

01:13:05.000 Talk about what you want to do.

01:13:07.000 Talk about what you want to do.

01:13:09.000 Don't talk about how bad the orange guy is.

01:13:10.000 Tell me what you want to do.

01:13:13.000 Don't use woke lingo. 1.00

01:13:15.000 Don't you fucking do it. 1.00

01:13:16.000 Don't you do it. 1.00

01:13:17.000 Tell me.

01:13:18.000 Tell me.

01:13:19.000 For real. 1.00

01:13:20.000 Don't bullshit me. 0.98

01:13:21.000 Tell me what you can do to fix this. 0.99

01:13:24.000 Just that.

01:13:25.000 Tell me you want to bring everybody together.

01:13:28.000 Just that.

01:13:29.000 Everybody.

01:13:29.000 Right, wing, left.

01:13:30.000 We've got to meet concessions.

01:13:31.000 We've got to figure out where we meet in the middle.

01:13:34.000 There's much more that we agree with than we don't agree.

01:13:37.000 Much more.

01:13:38.000 Let's concentrate on that stuff. 0.99

01:13:40.000 And let's be nice about this other shit. 0.99

01:13:42.000 Yeah, that's right. 0.99

01:13:43.000 That's it!

01:13:44.000 Look, it sounds like, you know, what you're saying, it's beautiful and one of the qualities that's beautiful about it is simple.

01:13:53.000 What I saw, I got to see the Dalai Lama speak once and it's like...

01:13:56.000 Wow, are you in person?

01:13:59.000 No, he was at an event, right?

01:14:01.000 But you were in the audience?

01:14:02.000 Yeah, I was in the audience.

01:14:03.000 So he was there, in the flesh.

01:14:04.000 He was there with his translator.

01:14:05.000 It was beautiful, man.

01:14:06.000 The vibe in the room was so sweet. 0.99

01:14:10.000 And to go back to what we were talking about earlier, some people will tell you a stupid thing, like a thing on the side of a cereal box. 0.78

01:14:17.000 Dude, I apologize for that. 0.63

01:14:19.000 Be kinder for...

01:14:20.000 Oh, I'm so sorry.

01:14:21.000 But I could tell you, Joe, you know what the world needs.

01:14:26.000 Love!

01:14:27.000 I do like cliches though sometimes.

01:14:30.000 Sometimes they're accurate.

01:14:31.000 Depends on who the cliches coming from.

01:14:33.000 If they're sincere.

01:14:34.000 So the Dalai Lama is on stage and he says, you can always be kinder.

01:14:39.000 And it was like you could feel this wave rushing out of him.

01:14:43.000 It was like the essence of Buddhism just rushing out.

01:14:47.000 Everyone simultaneously thinking like, Yeah, he's right.

01:14:50.000 And it transcends politics.

01:14:53.000 It transcends geopolitics.

01:14:54.000 And that, that is why it's what you're saying is so beautiful, because it's the same thing, which is like, you know, like, this planet, we're so lucky to be on a planet going that fast.

01:15:07.000 And like, we're so lucky to get a chance a little Peephole into time.

01:15:12.000 We're not here that long.

01:15:13.000 I think this COVID thing gives us an opportunity to realize how lucky we really are.

01:15:17.000 I do too.

01:15:18.000 I mean, for the people that are struggling right now financially or struggling with their health, it doesn't, you know, it doesn't register with you.

01:15:24.000 And I'm sorry about that.

01:15:25.000 But I think for the people that aren't fucked by this, there is a moment where we get to realize like, oh, okay, we were taking this for granted. 0.69

01:15:34.000 We thought we had all this thing wired in. 0.92

01:15:36.000 They didn't have it wired.

01:15:37.000 I mean, they got rid of the Senate.

01:15:38.000 What was the pandemic?

01:15:40.000 The White House decided, like a year before Corona, decided to get rid of the pandemic.

01:15:47.000 What was their response?

01:15:48.000 What was the actual office?

01:15:50.000 No, like he got rid of the whole office based on it.

01:15:52.000 They dissolved it.

01:15:54.000 Just imagine.

01:15:55.000 Imagine if there's an asteroid.

01:15:57.000 When's it coming?

01:15:58.000 40 years.

01:15:59.000 Fire everybody. 0.96

01:16:00.000 Fire everyone. 1.00

01:16:01.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:16:02.000 We're fucked. 1.00

01:16:03.000 Just fire everybody. 1.00

01:16:04.000 The more tests, the more sick people we have. 0.80

01:16:05.000 Stop the tests.

01:16:08.000 They did that for real!

01:16:10.000 I know!

01:16:11.000 So from that, what did they teach us?

01:16:13.000 They taught us that we have to depend on each other right now, not the state.

01:16:17.000 Well, I think they should give people the opportunity to do what they want to do.

01:16:22.000 I say this too much.

01:16:23.000 I say it at almost every show, but you can't tell people they can't work.

01:16:27.000 It doesn't make any sense. 0.90

01:16:28.000 You're not smart enough.

01:16:30.000 For you to say that the only thing that matters is whether or not these people expose themselves to the virus. 1.00

01:16:38.000 At this point, I think that's ridiculous.

01:16:40.000 But can I tell you the problem?

01:16:41.000 Here's the problem.

01:16:43.000 I'm sorry to cut you off.

01:16:44.000 But they have to acknowledge that something else matters.

01:16:47.000 They have to acknowledge that the financial problems that people are going through are almost insurmountable.

01:16:52.000 They have to acknowledge that.

01:16:53.000 And that destroys a lot of people.

01:16:55.000 It creates a lot of depression, creates a lot of suicide, creates a lot of drug abuse, creates a lot of turmoil and a lot of mental health issues.

01:17:02.000 That's a fact.

01:17:03.000 So we're taking away people's sovereignty.

01:17:07.000 Look, man, if you want to...

01:17:09.000 That was another great American tradition. 0.98

01:17:11.000 If you want to kill yourself, Well, you can do it with so many other ways. 1.00

01:17:15.000 You're welcome to kill yourself. 1.00

01:17:16.000 You can go BMX flipping. 0.99

01:17:17.000 No one's going to stop you from doing flips with your motorbike.

01:17:19.000 That was the whole point.

01:17:20.000 I mean, that's like, remember when everything got safe?

01:17:22.000 Like, the whole point, there was a time when everything was like, oh, gonzo.

01:17:25.000 The problem is you're spreading it, right?

01:17:27.000 So it's not just you and your motorbike.

01:17:29.000 It's you crashing your motorbike into a crowd of people.

01:17:31.000 That's what it's like.

01:17:33.000 That's a good way of looking at it, honestly. 0.99

01:17:35.000 Yeah, but to me, that is a problem and it's fucked. 0.98

01:17:38.000 The bigger problem is, okay, so you own an Applebee's or whatever, right? 0.97

01:17:43.000 And suddenly the government's like, okay, everyone can go back to work, but no one solved the problem.

01:17:48.000 You, the owner of the Applebee's, calls the general manager like, hey, dude, get the wait staff back.

01:17:54.000 We're open it up!

01:17:56.000 You're not going to be there.

01:17:57.000 You're going to have the general manager come in and you're going to have the waitstaff come in.

01:18:01.000 Now, the waitstaff have been living off of unemployment benefits supplied by the federal government that sometimes are more than like what they were making at the place.

01:18:10.000 That's not a bad thing.

01:18:11.000 But all of a sudden what happened is prior to a true reduction of this pandemic that Can kill you.

01:18:19.000 Most of the time it doesn't, but you might be the one who steps on the landmine.

01:18:22.000 All of a sudden, they've just decided, well, the economy needs to work.

01:18:27.000 So now your unemployment benefits get cut off, and you have to go back to work.

01:18:31.000 But they haven't solved the problem yet.

01:18:33.000 So you become the person who has to bear the weight of the failed approach to the disease. 0.99

01:18:41.000 And that's why it's fucked up. 0.99

01:18:43.000 Yes, you're right. 0.99

01:18:45.000 Man, my friend runs a new California barber shop in Echo Park, Brian.

01:18:49.000 He started off as my barber.

01:18:51.000 He became my best friend.

01:18:52.000 He's one of the coolest people I know.

01:18:56.000 One of the reasons I want to leave L.A. is because that shop can't open.

01:18:59.000 That's where I used to go to get my beard trimmed in my hair.

01:19:01.000 But it wasn't just that.

01:19:03.000 It's a real barber shop.

01:19:04.000 You have these great conversations.

01:19:06.000 You beat people.

01:19:07.000 He's gotten me into a sublet that I once, when I needed to be in L.A. for a little bit.

01:19:13.000 One of the sad things about being bald, I never really developed a relationship with a barber shop.

01:19:18.000 By the time I shaved my head, it was too late.

01:19:20.000 That's a good thing to do.

01:19:22.000 You can get a nice straight razor shave.

01:19:26.000 There's something about that, right?

01:19:28.000 With girls, it's acknowledged that a lot of ladies like beauty salons. 1.00

01:19:33.000 They like to get their nails done.

01:19:34.000 They like to get their pedicures.

01:19:36.000 They enjoy it.

01:19:38.000 That's all been shut down here, right?

01:19:40.000 Right.

01:19:40.000 And like, it sucks because I loved going there and it's like, but you know, the thing is like a lot of people, it's not time to go back to work because if there is a true risk that from making minimum wage, you're going to get a disease that probably won't kill you because you're a waiter at Applebee's.

01:19:56.000 You're probably going to be okay.

01:19:57.000 You're taking your vitamins, but you might be living with your... 1.00

01:19:59.000 My aunt who has Alzheimer's disease and you're gonna fucking kill her because you picked up a little bit of it and the reason you're gonna kill her is because you had to go back to work because your benefits got cut off. 0.99

01:20:09.000 So it's like this is why it's a very complex fucked up problem that really it's like yes for me a person I'm doing great. 0.99

01:20:19.000 I want everything open. 0.89

01:20:21.000 I want to go to Guitar Center.

01:20:22.000 Guitar Center is open but I don't want to stand in line.

01:20:26.000 I want everything to be the way it was.

01:20:28.000 I'm probably going to be okay.

01:20:29.000 But again, this is a complex problem.

01:20:33.000 I don't buy into the idea that the whole thing is a scam. 1.00

01:20:36.000 I think we've got exactly what that asshole... 1.00

01:20:38.000 Why did I say asshole? 1.00

01:20:40.000 Too much booze. 1.00

01:20:41.000 It was actually the opposite of an asshole on your show. 1.00

01:20:44.000 I'm calling a doctor an asshole. 1.00

01:20:46.000 Remember the Joe Rogan questions everything? 1.00

01:20:48.000 The virologist who told us there's going to be another great pandemic.

01:20:52.000 Six years ago?

01:20:53.000 I've talked about this before, but we should tell people.

01:20:55.000 Duncan and I were in Galveston, Texas, and we went to the Center for Disease Control and went to the very place where they experiment on Ebola and all these crazy diseases that kill you instantly.

01:21:07.000 And Duncan and I were in this building and we were watching.

01:21:10.000 We watched through a window. 0.91

01:21:12.000 That takes you there's like another window behind that that's like this plexiglass sealed room and they have like spacesuits on and tubes and I'm like hold on hold on so there's some shit in there that can kill everybody like a hundred percent Like it's right there and they were doing tests on it. 0.89

01:21:29.000 And so these people are wearing like space suits and they're walking around with these horrific world-killing diseases. 0.98

01:21:37.000 Yeah, man.

01:21:37.000 And remember we missed the flight?

01:21:39.000 Yeah, we did.

01:21:40.000 We missed the flight.

01:21:41.000 We had to get there. 0.99

01:21:41.000 We were just high as fuck at the airport talking. 0.99

01:21:44.000 Talking! 0.99

01:21:45.000 And the flight took off.

01:21:47.000 Duncan and I lost total track of time.

01:21:49.000 We were barbecued.

01:21:51.000 Did we take edibles?

01:21:52.000 Dude, I don't remember.

01:21:53.000 We did something.

01:21:54.000 We were so high.

01:21:55.000 We forgot we were at the airport.

01:21:57.000 My custom is to take an edible in the car.

01:22:00.000 My custom.

01:22:01.000 That's because it takes time to get to the airport, and by the time you get to the airport, the absurdity of it all just kicks in in full steam.

01:22:08.000 Because it's like, I have no control at the airport.

01:22:10.000 The airport is a place where you just want to give up complete control, and when you're super duper duper high, that's a fun ride.

01:22:16.000 The best.

01:22:17.000 So you and I were just sitting down talking about life, and that plane went, and we're like, where's the plane?

01:22:23.000 Like, the plane left.

01:22:23.000 Like, what?

01:22:24.000 We didn't just miss the plane by like 10 minutes.

01:22:27.000 Like 40 minutes!

01:22:28.000 Yeah! 1.00

01:22:30.000 It was the ultimate dumb stoner moment. 1.00

01:22:32.000 Like if we weren't on our way to film a television show, we would have looked like the biggest losers. 0.99

01:22:37.000 We looked like losers anyway, but we had fun and we took one in the morning and we got there with very little sleep.

01:22:42.000 We made it.

01:22:43.000 We made it.

01:22:43.000 But being in like the Galveston, Texas Centers for Disease Control with like very little...

01:22:49.000 This is different.

01:22:49.000 This is the...

01:22:50.000 That's the mime.

01:22:51.000 This is Duncan went to some preppers.

01:22:53.000 This was one that I really loved, because I didn't get a chance to be with you, so I got to watch it, you know, like from the clips and see what it was like when you went to that.

01:23:00.000 Why didn't you get to be at that one?

01:23:01.000 I was doing something else.

01:23:02.000 We were trying to film two things at the same time, I think, that time.

01:23:04.000 You know what, man? 0.99

01:23:05.000 I was really like, not annoyed, because I love doing the show, but I'm like, of course he doesn't show up to this motherfucker. 0.99

01:23:11.000 Because, like, suddenly I end up deep in a... 0.99

01:23:13.000 I'm deep in a cave.

01:23:14.000 I would have totally done it, but I think it was when there was a bunch of things we were trying to film and we were short on time, so we couldn't do things together.

01:23:21.000 But remember we did the Skinwalker Ranch one together?

01:23:23.000 You were so pissed.

01:23:24.000 It was so fake!

01:23:27.000 The problem was when we got there, right when we got there, we heard this preposterous story from this person who threw a cigarette on the ground after he- That's what set you off!

01:23:36.000 100%. 1.00

01:23:36.000 Yeah, because I'm like, this is a moron. 1.00

01:23:38.000 He threw a cigarette on the ground in the forest. 1.00

01:23:40.000 This is a moron. 1.00

01:23:41.000 Like, we drove here for- and he's lying. 1.00

01:23:43.000 We're here with a moron who's lying. 1.00

01:23:45.000 I'm like, oh, great. 1.00

01:23:46.000 Great.

01:23:46.000 I actually asked him to pick it up.

01:23:48.000 I'm like, come on, man.

01:23:49.000 I remember that moment, dude.

01:23:51.000 It's a beautiful Utah forest.

01:23:55.000 You smoke a cigarette and you throw it down and you step on it.

01:23:58.000 You're not my kind of person.

01:24:00.000 Joe, here's the reason you're so American.

01:24:02.000 You really do believe in the utopian ideal and Joe Rogan questions everything for real.

01:24:09.000 Both of us, this is what I realized years after, we both had a sense in our heart that we might really find Proof.

01:24:18.000 Of something big.

01:24:20.000 And we went into it with that attitude.

01:24:22.000 We did.

01:24:23.000 But we were so high, we believed what we were saying.

01:24:27.000 Dude!

01:24:27.000 That's the funniest thing about it!

01:24:29.000 It's like, you know, most people when they do these shows, they're not going into it thinking like, I'm actually going to uncover something.

01:24:36.000 Yeah, of course.

01:24:37.000 They don't go into it thinking they're going to uncover something. 0.95

01:24:39.000 They go into it thinking, this is all a bunch of bullshit, and I'm going to be like, or maybe they think maybe it's real or whatever, but the main thing is, they... 0.99

01:24:48.000 They pretend it's real. 0.99

01:24:50.000 That's the thing.

01:24:51.000 They pretend it's real.

01:24:52.000 We didn't pretend it's real.

01:24:53.000 And we also went into it like two guys who were more high during a show, you will not find.

01:25:00.000 That's true.

01:25:01.000 You will not find.

01:25:04.000 That's me, barbecued, looking for Bigfoot.

01:25:08.000 Dude, I was barbecued.

01:25:11.000 We were so high, dude.

01:25:12.000 And this guy, we don't need to blow this guy's spot up.

01:25:14.000 He's a poor fellow.

01:25:15.000 Look at me, my hipster face.

01:25:18.000 Oh boy.

01:25:19.000 Listen, people love...

01:25:21.000 Maybe he believes what he's saying.

01:25:22.000 Maybe all that stuff that they were telling us, they really truly believe.

01:25:27.000 But they were talking about bulletproof wolves that appear out of mist and all this stuff.

01:25:31.000 To me, that moment was when the show went south.

01:25:33.000 And what was really funny was the last thing the sci-fi network wanted was for you to actually begin to realize that maybe we're not going to find UFOs.

01:25:45.000 And they started getting unhappy, I think, with the situation.

01:25:49.000 Oh, they did get unhappy.

01:25:50.000 There was actually a conversation where they're like, is he trying to debunk these things?

01:25:54.000 Because they have all these shows on UFOs and all these shows on ghosts. 1.00

01:25:58.000 And then they have this comedian asshole with his asshole buddy and they're both high as fuck. 1.00

01:26:02.000 And they're like, this is so fake. 1.00

01:26:06.000 But we wanted to know.

01:26:10.000 We wanted to know.

01:26:11.000 We wanted to know if it was real or if it was fake.

01:26:13.000 Remember the alien artifacts part?

01:26:15.000 Do you remember that part?

01:26:16.000 There was someone who collected all these alien little bits of dust and metal.

01:26:20.000 You don't remember it, probably.

01:26:21.000 I remember it.

01:26:22.000 I don't remember that because I was already given up on that point.

01:26:25.000 I noticed a pad, unfortunately, and I feel real bad, but it was really a personal thing because I was dealing with my own nonsense.

01:26:33.000 My own inclivity, my own inclination to believe ridiculous stories, even today, like with the Pentagon story about them having recovered a craft not made from this world.

01:26:46.000 I'm like, please don't let it be a misquote.

01:26:48.000 I don't want to read the misquote, man.

01:26:50.000 I don't. 0.99

01:26:50.000 So I know that there's a real pull to believing in bullshit. 0.99

01:26:55.000 There's a real pull to manipulating the actual facts of Roswell so that it appears the government absolutely 100% colluded to keep the alien crash from the general public and there's no way it could be a weather balloon. 0.96

01:27:08.000 I don't know if that's right, man, because I know it in myself.

01:27:12.000 Because I see it in myself. 1.00

01:27:13.000 I see that dirty little asshole that wants to believe in Bigfoot. 1.00

01:27:17.000 That stupid fuck. 1.00

01:27:19.000 They're like, hey, hey, hey, maybe it's a bear! 1.00

01:27:22.000 Maybe it's not a lost monkey species, but I want to believe so bad. 1.00

01:27:26.000 I don't think that's a dirty asshole. 1.00

01:27:28.000 But this is me. 1.00

01:27:29.000 This is me.

01:27:30.000 I've worked on this.

01:27:31.000 This is something that I've spent a lot of time thinking about.

01:27:34.000 There's a lot of people out there that just lie.

01:27:36.000 They're not thinking about anything.

01:27:38.000 But they, the same way, they want to believe too.

01:27:42.000 They want to believe in UFOs.

01:27:43.000 They want to believe in Bigfoot.

01:27:44.000 They want to believe in all these things.

01:27:46.000 They want to believe.

01:27:46.000 Yeah.

01:27:47.000 And it's not their fault. 0.99

01:27:49.000 They grew up in a fucked up town, and their friends were probably all drunk by the time they were four, and the whole thing's a mess. 1.00

01:27:55.000 And here they are, stuck in this situation where they're just making shit up. 0.99

01:27:58.000 And here you and I are, standing there going, I don't think this guy ever really was kidnapped by Bigfoot. 0.96

01:28:03.000 Yeah. 0.83

01:28:04.000 And we get to hear these ridiculous stories. 0.86

01:28:06.000 And there was too many of them, man. 0.97

01:28:08.000 Everybody we talked to had this real obvious psychological bend to them.

01:28:15.000 There was always like...

01:28:16.000 And no one had a steady chassis.

01:28:18.000 Knowing who you were talking to, right?

01:28:21.000 Yes. 0.99

01:28:22.000 You remember the fucking Bigfoot guy that said he would chop his pinky off to find out if Bigfoot was real? 0.99

01:28:26.000 He was a professor. 0.99

01:28:28.000 Of what?

01:28:28.000 He was a professor.

01:28:29.000 I forget.

01:28:30.000 We had him on the podcast.

01:28:31.000 We had the foot, the footprint.

01:28:34.000 Dr. Melcher.

01:28:36.000 Dr. Melcher, right?

01:28:37.000 Meldrum.

01:28:38.000 Meldrum, yes.

01:28:38.000 Thank you, Jamie's the wizard.

01:28:40.000 Dr. Meldrum.

01:28:41.000 Dr. Meldrum, he said he would cut his finger off to find out if Bigfoot was real.

01:28:46.000 Would you cut your finger off to find out?

01:28:47.000 No! 0.94

01:28:48.000 I don't care.

01:28:49.000 Listen, I hope it's not real.

01:28:51.000 I hope it's real.

01:28:52.000 I don't care.

01:28:53.000 Either one would be awesome.

01:28:55.000 What data set would you cut your finger off?

01:28:57.000 I would cut my finger off to know if there was an intelligent design to creation on Earth.

01:29:02.000 I would give them the very tip of my pinky for that. 0.86

01:29:04.000 But then what happens?

01:29:06.000 Then you run around with this information, you can't share with anybody, and you're freaked out all day?

01:29:09.000 Well, no, then I try to contact that thing in a more intense way.

01:29:13.000 I mean, like the...

01:29:14.000 The tip of the pinky is not a bad thing to get rid of.

01:29:16.000 Yeah, for knowing whether there's...

01:29:19.000 Again, you have to like...

01:29:20.000 It's a week.

01:29:21.000 First of all, what kind of computer are you working with that you're going to have to take your pinky and drop it in to get truth out of it? 1.00

01:29:28.000 It's a stupid computer. 1.00

01:29:30.000 You shouldn't trust it. 1.00

01:29:31.000 If you ever want to feel what it's like to be like three again...

01:29:35.000 Make your thumb wrestle your pinky. 1.00

01:29:38.000 Your pinky's like, shit! 1.00

01:29:40.000 You have no power in your pinky. 1.00

01:29:42.000 Your pinky's so weak.

01:29:43.000 That's what it's like to be like a three-year-old straining against your older brother. 0.95

01:29:47.000 Get off me! 1.00

01:29:48.000 Get off me, asshole! 1.00

01:29:50.000 You got a pinky. 1.00

01:29:52.000 That's right. 1.00

01:29:52.000 What a bullshit little digit. 1.00

01:29:55.000 What does that thing get used for? 1.00

01:29:58.000 What does it get used for?

01:30:00.000 I dislocated both of them.

01:30:01.000 You dislocated them?

01:30:03.000 Your pinky?

01:30:03.000 They don't match up.

01:30:04.000 Oh, dude. 1.00

01:30:06.000 Oh, damn. 0.99

01:30:07.000 Oh, that's weird. 1.00

01:30:09.000 Basketball.

01:30:10.000 Oh, that makes sense.

01:30:12.000 You use it for holding wine.

01:30:13.000 You need it to extend when you're drinking.

01:30:16.000 Yes.

01:30:17.000 Look, man.

01:30:17.000 It's very important.

01:30:18.000 I think that...

01:30:19.000 I hurt my pinky doing that.

01:30:22.000 Wrestling with my thumb, like legitimately, it hurts now.

01:30:26.000 It's so weak.

01:30:27.000 It's so weak.

01:30:28.000 But I do so much with my hands.

01:30:30.000 I do so many chin-ups.

01:30:32.000 There's some reason for it.

01:30:33.000 So many kettlebell grips, and it's mostly these other fingers.

01:30:36.000 Even when you draw back a bow, my release doesn't even have a pinky thing.

01:30:42.000 I draw back with these fingers. 1.00

01:30:43.000 This bitch ass just hangs around for the ride. 1.00

01:30:45.000 You're so mean to your pinky. 1.00

01:30:47.000 Why do you do that to your pinkies? 1.00

01:30:48.000 I love my pinkies.

01:30:49.000 Yeah.

01:30:50.000 I love them.

01:30:50.000 They're great.

01:30:51.000 I don't want to miss them.

01:30:52.000 But think of the name itself.

01:30:54.000 But it's weird how weak it is compared to all the other digits you have.

01:30:56.000 And they named it a pinky.

01:30:58.000 The whole thing is messed up.

01:31:00.000 The whole thing does sound like...

01:31:01.000 It is a very weak...

01:31:03.000 The name pinky itself is like... 1.00

01:31:06.000 I will fuck you up with this finger. 1.00

01:31:08.000 This finger right here is strong as fuck. 1.00

01:31:10.000 This finger gets a hold of shit. 1.00

01:31:12.000 This is a strong finger. 1.00

01:31:13.000 This is a bullshit finger that's not hurting anybody. 1.00

01:31:16.000 They're all on the same hand. 1.00

01:31:18.000 Listen, everyone belongs on the hand.

01:31:20.000 Like, we have to forget the pinky.

01:31:21.000 Imagine if you were as strong physically as your small toe.

01:31:27.000 That's life. 1.00

01:31:29.000 Everything can fuck you up. 0.98

01:31:31.000 Every pebble is murderous. 1.00

01:31:34.000 Jumping off stairs the wrong way, you stub your toe, you want to die. 0.66

01:31:38.000 That's who you are.

01:31:39.000 You are as strong as your little baby toe.

01:31:42.000 Your little baby toe has zero power.

01:31:44.000 Grab your little baby toe and wrestle with it real quick. 1.00

01:31:47.000 It has nothing.

01:31:48.000 It's a mess.

01:31:48.000 It's a baby.

01:31:49.000 They call it a baby toe because babies are stronger than your baby toe. 1.00

01:31:55.000 It's a bitch-ass little limb. 1.00

01:31:58.000 Yeah, that's the funny thing about the human sentient projection into time. 0.99

01:32:03.000 It's like, we're probably like the little toe of the universe, you know?

01:32:08.000 Like, we have just enough realization to know that we're something, we're this hilarious intersection of like, you know, meat and what appears, like a real feeling of like, you know, I do feel like, bias aside, if there isn't a part of you that hasn't like really come to the conclusion that there seems to be a part of you that doesn't Get touched by reality,

01:32:28.000 some eternal part of you that has met time and space.

01:32:33.000 I feel like most people get that sense.

01:32:36.000 Kids feel that.

01:32:37.000 They know that.

01:32:38.000 They just actually know it.

01:32:39.000 But, you know, to me, I think maybe what we are in this little temporary, whatever it may be, whether it's an aquarium, whether it's a training facility, I think it's probably a training facility, I don't think it's that.

01:32:52.000 I think it's a process.

01:32:54.000 And I think the process has to be tumultuous, because if it's not, nothing gets done.

01:32:58.000 I think the struggles have to exist, because if there's only harmony and peace, everybody gets stagnant.

01:33:04.000 That's right.

01:33:05.000 There's a steady push towards ultimate technological innovation.

01:33:10.000 That's the steadiest push.

01:33:11.000 If you look at the human race in terms of what it makes, What does it do?

01:33:16.000 At the end of the day, if you have these bees and they have all these different social things they do and all these different things they do for covering territory and ground and all these different aspects of being a bee and laying the larva inside the honeycomb, what do they do?

01:33:32.000 They make honey. 0.99

01:33:32.000 They make honey, bitch! 0.99

01:33:34.000 That's what they do. 1.00

01:33:35.000 They make honey.

01:33:35.000 What do we do?

01:33:36.000 We make robots.

01:33:37.000 We make computers.

01:33:38.000 We make technology. 0.97

01:33:39.000 We make it better every fucking year. 0.97

01:33:41.000 We don't make better laws every year. 0.99

01:33:43.000 Like, no, no, no. 1.00

01:33:43.000 We don't revise that shit. 1.00

01:33:45.000 We got stuff written with fucking ink from charcoal, you know? 1.00

01:33:49.000 That shit's like in the archive somewhere. 1.00

01:33:51.000 What we do is we make better shit. 1.00

01:33:53.000 Every year we make better shit. 1.00

01:33:54.000 And our goal is just keep making better shit. 1.00

01:33:57.000 And I'm obsessed with better shit. 1.00

01:33:59.000 I'm obsessed with cell phones, and I'm obsessed. 0.99

01:34:03.000 I love Unbox Therapy or any of those shows. 0.97

01:34:08.000 Marcus Brownlee, when they're doing these Unbox videos and talking about the newest, latest, and greatest technology, and they're showing these 120 hertz screens and these fucking cameras with 100x optical zoom. 0.97

01:34:20.000 Amazing. 0.97

01:34:21.000 Amazing.

01:34:22.000 But what are we doing?

01:34:23.000 We're moving ourselves closer and closer to some kind of technological superiority.

01:34:28.000 And along the way, we're losing our humanity.

01:34:29.000 And that's the weirdest, most ironic part of it.

01:34:32.000 Along the way, we've never been in a greater technological era. 0.87

01:34:38.000 If you look in terms of the things that are consumer electronics that get released right now, whether it's laptops or iPhones or Samsung Notebook, 20s or whatever the fuck they are. 0.71

01:34:49.000 These things are insane, right? 0.54

01:34:50.000 Never been in a time like this before.

01:34:52.000 This has peaked also, when have we ever had a time where there's riots in every city?

01:34:58.000 Every city, all across the country.

01:35:00.000 And a lot of it is things that most people agree with, right?

01:35:04.000 Yeah.

01:35:05.000 Especially if you say something like Black Lives Matter. 0.98

01:35:07.000 Let's have a vote.

01:35:08.000 How many people don't agree with that statement?

01:35:11.000 Forget about what everybody wants, oh, the Marxist thing and these people, they want to destroy the nuclear family.

01:35:17.000 I don't know if they do or they don't, but most people, I bet, who are a part of that movement don't even know what that means. 1.00

01:35:23.000 They don't know all that shit. 0.99

01:35:24.000 They just don't want people to get killed by cops. 1.00

01:35:26.000 That's it!

01:35:28.000 Michael Che has a great bit about it where it says, that's not even asking a lot.

01:35:32.000 Matters?

01:35:33.000 Black lives matter? 1.00

01:35:34.000 Just matters?

01:35:35.000 And people are like, man, I don't know.

01:35:38.000 This is the strangest time for us socially because of COVID. This is the strangest time because of the economy.

01:35:45.000 The strangest time because Trump is president and there's chaos and the guy who's running against him is older than him.

01:35:52.000 And you're like, this is madness.

01:35:53.000 What is happening here? 0.97

01:35:55.000 And no one knows when the fuck people are going to be able to go back to work and there's all this chaos and all this anxiety. 0.96

01:36:00.000 It's all happening together at once. 0.97

01:36:02.000 I know, man.

01:36:03.000 I know.

01:36:04.000 That's what this is.

01:36:05.000 You know, this is what I love.

01:36:07.000 I work with a meditation teacher, David Nictor, and he's brilliant.

01:36:13.000 And one of the things he tells me, and I really...

01:36:16.000 This is an example of how cool he is. 0.99

01:36:18.000 This is when all the New York Times shit came out about the aliens. 0.99

01:36:22.000 I call him, I'm like, David, New York Times, aliens. 0.99

01:36:27.000 And he's like, wow, wow.

01:36:29.000 And then his response was, Duncan, Where do you think thoughts come from?

01:36:33.000 Do you think they are born from something?

01:36:39.000 That was his response to me telling about aliens, was the question.

01:36:42.000 Where do you think thoughts come from?

01:36:44.000 Are thoughts like born like the way...

01:36:47.000 Well, it's a good question.

01:36:48.000 It's a great question.

01:36:49.000 I still haven't figured it out.

01:36:51.000 I've asked if ideas were aliens.

01:36:53.000 I think that if you think about a cell phone, right?

01:36:56.000 I mean, obviously there's a collaborative effort involving a lot of people that understand all sorts of different aspects of technology, but ultimately it has to be an idea.

01:37:03.000 Someone has to have the idea to come up with the original Motorola phone, the fucking brick, and then they had the idea to innovate and keep getting better and better.

01:37:10.000 And these ideas eventually lead to this thing that can open your car door, turn your lights on, your house, you can FaceTime your kids. 0.72

01:37:18.000 It's a crazy, crazy, crazy thing, and it's all coming out of ideas.

01:37:22.000 Where do they come from?

01:37:24.000 That's the question.

01:37:25.000 The question is, is it an inherent part of being a human being?

01:37:28.000 Because, like all other aspects of human beings, we are not a single organism.

01:37:35.000 We are a biosphere.

01:37:38.000 The human organism is essentially an ecosystem.

01:37:41.000 The human organism has untold trillions of bacteria in our gut, right?

01:37:48.000 We have it on our skin.

01:37:49.000 We have all sorts of weird life forms that we live synergistically in this space as a person.

01:37:57.000 Why wouldn't we think ideas would be a part of that?

01:37:59.000 Yeah, right.

01:37:59.000 They might very well be a part of that.

01:38:01.000 And the healthier your mind is, the more you're able to live with ideas, the more you're able to bounce ideas around, like ideas as a life form.

01:38:09.000 If you use antibacterial soap all over your body all the time, you get sick.

01:38:14.000 Yeah, right. 1.00

01:38:14.000 You get fucking rashes and shit, because your body, it kills all the good bacteria, too. 1.00

01:38:20.000 Yeah, it's like, man, I love the question because, like, One of my favorite acid trips was I was listening to Beethoven. 1.00

01:38:31.000 Oh, wow!

01:38:32.000 Oh, man.

01:38:33.000 I don't know how it happened, but I had this beautiful girl.

01:38:40.000 She was so beautiful.

01:38:41.000 I was at her house.

01:38:43.000 We're listening to Beethoven.

01:38:44.000 I was tripping.

01:38:46.000 It was just romantic and cool.

01:38:49.000 But then I started thinking, somebody thought of this.

01:38:53.000 And then I started thinking, But where did it come from?

01:38:59.000 Like if they thought of it, what was it before they thought of it?

01:39:02.000 Like this didn't exist before Beethoven.

01:39:06.000 So where was it?

01:39:07.000 And I remember that as I was like thinking that on the best, still to this day, the best acid I ever had.

01:39:16.000 What's the difference?

01:39:17.000 I'm not much of an acid connoisseur.

01:39:19.000 What's the difference between really good acid and mediocre acid?

01:39:24.000 Apparently it has something to do with the mechanism of production, right?

01:39:27.000 The way it's...

01:39:28.000 Yeah.

01:39:29.000 Which is like, listen to like Kid Charlamagne by Steely Dan.

01:39:32.000 It's all about one of the great Owsley, one of the great LSD chemists of our time, who I met his wife and I asked her this question, like, why is acid not as good as it used to be in the 60s?

01:39:46.000 And her response was, people aren't perfectionists anymore, honey.

01:39:52.000 That was literally the response.

01:39:54.000 We will sell no wine before it's time.

01:39:56.000 Yeah!

01:39:57.000 It was like, I don't know, but...

01:39:59.000 Well, that's...

01:40:00.000 I mean, that's the thing that we want with whiskey.

01:40:04.000 Like, that's one of the things about Buffalo Trace, who bottles this stuff.

01:40:08.000 Yeah.

01:40:08.000 They taste everything.

01:40:10.000 So good.

01:40:11.000 And if it's not good, they're connoisseurs.

01:40:14.000 Yeah.

01:40:14.000 So that we want...

01:40:16.000 I understand that you would want that with acid.

01:40:17.000 The problem is that acid is illegal.

01:40:19.000 That's the real problem. 1.00

01:40:20.000 The problem is you have some fucking space daddy. 1.00

01:40:22.000 Some dude who's at the top of the fucking helm of this spaceship as it hurls through infinity. 1.00

01:40:28.000 Space daddy. 1.00

01:40:29.000 They don't want you.

01:40:30.000 They have to be space daddy. 0.79

01:40:32.000 If it's the president of the United States, that's space daddy.

01:40:34.000 Right?

01:40:34.000 Yeah.

01:40:34.000 The president of the United States is space daddy.

01:40:37.000 He is the fucking leader of the greatest army the world's ever known. 1.00

01:40:41.000 He's at the helm of the global empire. 1.00

01:40:44.000 That's Space Daddy.

01:40:45.000 And we're going through space.

01:40:46.000 So if we are a spaceship, the President of the United States is Space Daddy.

01:40:49.000 It's Captain Kirk.

01:40:50.000 He has to be, right?

01:40:50.000 Yeah.

01:40:51.000 Well, it's not the Space Daddy that's made LSD illegal.

01:40:55.000 What's made LSD illegal was an earlier Space Daddy.

01:40:58.000 Yes, 1970 Space Daddy that tried to disband the Civil Rights Movement.

01:41:02.000 They're making drugs, like all Schedule I drugs.

01:41:05.000 Bad Space Daddy did it. 0.71

01:41:06.000 But the good news is, at least at the very least, they're letting people look at what it is and how it affects the brain.

01:41:15.000 And they're beginning to understand that everything we all knew There's no point getting resentful about it, but we all knew this.

01:41:24.000 We all knew this.

01:41:26.000 It's being validated, thank God.

01:41:28.000 It's very sweet because it's a healing drug, especially when used with therapy.

01:41:35.000 It's healing.

01:41:35.000 It's a very powerful Beautiful, wonderful thing that exists on the planet that anyone could have access to, especially if they, like, stop this ridiculous prohibition and lifted the prohibition.

01:41:49.000 I'm not saying, like, don't prohibit heroin.

01:41:51.000 Prohibit heroin.

01:41:52.000 Prohibit methamphetamine.

01:41:54.000 But even...

01:41:57.000 Regulate it.

01:41:57.000 The problem is, I don't want anybody doing it, but I should be able to tell you not to.

01:42:02.000 That's the problem.

01:42:03.000 That really is the problem.

01:42:05.000 The problem is, I shouldn't be able to tell you not to.

01:42:07.000 That's right.

01:42:08.000 And certainly, like...

01:42:10.000 Because it's too slippery.

01:42:11.000 But you shouldn't be able to, like, there shouldn't be a five-year mandatory minimum for LSD. I mean, that's madness.

01:42:15.000 No, that's madness.

01:42:16.000 And it really does heal people.

01:42:18.000 It's a healing set.

01:42:19.000 Look, do your research.

01:42:21.000 Look into it.

01:42:22.000 Have you read Chaos?

01:42:23.000 No.

01:42:23.000 The Tom O'Neill book?

01:42:25.000 No.

01:42:25.000 Oh my God, dude.

01:42:26.000 One of my favorite podcasts over the last year I did was with Tom O'Neill.

01:42:29.000 And he's Greg Fitzsimmons' neighbor.

01:42:31.000 He was Greg Fitzsimmons' neighbor for like 20 years in Venice.

01:42:33.000 Wow, cool.

01:42:34.000 The whole time he was Greg's neighbor, he was working on this book.

01:42:37.000 Now, Greg never brings someone to me.

01:42:40.000 Never.

01:42:41.000 Never says, dude, you gotta have this guy as a guest.

01:42:43.000 Ever.

01:42:44.000 So, out of all these years, Greg's like, dude, this guy you need to have on. 0.97

01:42:48.000 This guy researched Charles Manson for 20 fucking years. 0.87

01:42:52.000 He was originally just writing an article. 0.99

01:42:54.000 He was writing an article, but as he's writing this article, he starts uncovering more and more crazy shit, and he goes deeper and deeper into this, where 20 fucking years later, he finally puts out this book. 0.50

01:43:05.000 And this book is basically detailing a CIA LSD operation where Charles Manson was getting dosed in prison, allegedly, and he was being treated at this free clinic in Haight-Ashbury that ran for more than 50 years and closed three months after the book was released. 0.99

01:43:22.000 Damn. 1.00

01:43:22.000 They ran this fucking free clinic where they were dosing hippies! 1.00

01:43:25.000 And they were testing them. 1.00

01:43:26.000 They ran Operation Midnight Climax.

01:43:28.000 It was all part of MKUltra. 0.68

01:43:29.000 He's detailing step by step all these people that were directly involved in not just Charles Manson, but in fucking Jack Ruby and all these other political figures in history. 1.00

01:43:39.000 And it's like, what in the fuck? 0.99

01:43:41.000 All these mind control CIA LSD experiments that were real. 1.00

01:43:46.000 And Charles Manson was a part of that.

01:43:47.000 Yeah.

01:43:48.000 Allegedly.

01:43:49.000 And Charles Manson was dosing up these hippies and not taking it himself. 0.97

01:43:53.000 He was using the techniques that they allegedly used on him for like seven years while he was in federal penitentiary.

01:43:59.000 What a mess.

01:44:00.000 This is the problem with like anytime power.

01:44:02.000 You gotta read this book, man.

01:44:03.000 Look, I've read a lot about the MKUltra stuff.

01:44:07.000 This one's different.

01:44:08.000 It's just specifically what they did to allow Manson to run free and build these murderous hippies and get them high on LSD. This was all a part of this thing to sort of demonize the anti-war movement.

01:44:19.000 There was all these different strategies they were doing to demonize the anti-war movement. 0.75

01:44:22.000 Yeah, because you take LSD and war seems ridiculous. 0.90

01:44:25.000 You take LSD and money seems ridiculous. 0.97

01:44:27.000 You take LSD and anything that doesn't have to do with love seems insane. 0.98

01:44:33.000 The problem is, all the psychedelic bullshit aside, if you just look at basic Buddhism 101, Prior to this pandemic, my favorite conversations were in Ubers, man. 0.67

01:44:48.000 And I'm riding this Uber. 0.96

01:44:49.000 And this Uber driver, who's clearly a Buddhist, he's got a Buddhist statue on his dashboard.

01:44:55.000 So we started talking about Buddhism.

01:44:58.000 And we're talking about it.

01:45:00.000 He said the coolest thing I've ever heard of regarding Buddhism, which is he's like, do you know how you look at letters and you think that they're a language?

01:45:12.000 What are you before that?

01:45:16.000 It's so cool!

01:45:19.000 Thank God there's people like that in the world.

01:45:21.000 I know.

01:45:22.000 Well, that's a true Buddhist. 0.93

01:45:23.000 That's a true missionary.

01:45:24.000 But an LSD will return you to that state.

01:45:28.000 So it will drop you under all of your apps that are running on the operating system of your consciousness for a little bit.

01:45:35.000 Some people hate that because they so identify with the apps that the moment they can't cling to the app, they become this thing before the language.

01:45:45.000 Which is why some people on a lot of apps can't talk.

01:45:48.000 They talk like babies.

01:45:51.000 What's happening is you're encountering original sentience prior to conditioning.

01:45:57.000 And that's dangerous to any kind of power structure.

01:46:02.000 If I'm trying to implement a hierarchy, I depend on your consciousness flowing into these rivulets that are language, morality, ethics, the entire structure of whatever I'm trying to tell you is the way things are.

01:46:19.000 And if I can do that, Then I can own you, because suddenly your morality isn't real morality.

01:46:25.000 Your ethics aren't real ethics.

01:46:27.000 Your idea of what's right isn't necessarily what's right.

01:46:30.000 It's what's right for capitalism, what's right for communism, what's right for this or that.

01:46:35.000 If I can tell you, if I can make your moral compass point away from service in any way, shape or form, I can control you forever.

01:46:45.000 And so anything that gets in the way of that is really like generally like delegitimized by power structures.

01:46:51.000 I mean it makes sense.

01:46:52.000 The problem is you're dealing with a combination of morality And a game.

01:47:00.000 And the game is trying to make money.

01:47:02.000 Like when you have numbers, you know, I'm reading this book right now.

01:47:05.000 I'm listening to it on tape.

01:47:07.000 It's called Irresistible.

01:47:09.000 I keep forgetting this dude's name who wrote the book, but I'm listening to it on audiobook.

01:47:15.000 It's Adam Alter.

01:47:18.000 And it's all about addictions.

01:47:19.000 It's all about particularly how addictive games are.

01:47:22.000 Insanely addictive.

01:47:23.000 Games like Tetris and Candy Crush.

01:47:26.000 Insanely addictive.

01:47:26.000 Where they've made billions and billions of dollars on Candy Crush.

01:47:29.000 It's crazy.

01:47:31.000 People can't put it down. 0.99

01:47:32.000 Like Farmland made fucking unbelievable amounts of money. 1.00

01:47:35.000 Crazy. 0.99

01:47:35.000 There's something about numbers. 0.99

01:47:37.000 You look at your bank account.

01:47:39.000 You go, I've got $15,000 in the bank.

01:47:41.000 I can't believe this. 0.97

01:47:42.000 That's pretty fucking good. 0.97

01:47:43.000 I remember when I was broke. 0.98

01:47:44.000 And then you go, you know what?

01:47:45.000 It would be great if I had 50. I'd just like to get 20. This year, I'm just going to cut back on going out to eat.

01:47:51.000 I'm going to do that.

01:47:52.000 I'm going to put five away.

01:47:53.000 And then you're like, you know what?

01:47:54.000 I need to make more.

01:47:55.000 That's what I need to do.

01:47:56.000 I need to make more money.

01:47:57.000 I want to put in some overtime.

01:47:58.000 I'm going to talk to the boss.

01:47:59.000 I'm going to look.

01:48:00.000 I'm dedicated. 0.99

01:48:00.000 I don't give a fuck. 0.99

01:48:01.000 A lot of people get tired. 0.99

01:48:02.000 I don't get tired, dude. 0.98

01:48:03.000 I am dedicated to this fucking job, and I want to move up in this company. 0.99

01:48:05.000 And the boss is like, yes, come on aboard, slave man. 0.99

01:48:10.000 You're gonna work for the corporation 18 hours a day.

01:48:13.000 You're getting paid well, don't get me wrong, you're not really a slave, but what you are is a slave to your own idea of what success is.

01:48:21.000 You're a slave to the idea that numbers equate success.

01:48:25.000 You don't notice, man, You don't notice.

01:48:29.000 You don't notice.

01:48:30.000 You get used to everywhere you live.

01:48:32.000 It's nice if you live in a place that's safe.

01:48:34.000 After that, I'm telling you, you don't notice.

01:48:37.000 You know what you notice?

01:48:38.000 You notice when your friends are around you and you're enjoying each other's company and you're laughing and having fun.

01:48:44.000 You notice those things.

01:48:45.000 You notice if you do something and people enjoy it.

01:48:47.000 You notice if you have a good interaction with someone at a store.

01:48:52.000 They go, no, you.

01:48:53.000 And then you go, no, you.

01:48:54.000 And then you're both smiling and laughing.

01:48:56.000 Those are nice moments, man.

01:48:59.000 We have those.

01:48:59.000 We still have those.

01:49:00.000 You let somebody in front of you, and they give you the peace on.

01:49:03.000 You give them the thumbs up.

01:49:05.000 These moments are still here, man.

01:49:07.000 They're more than they're not.

01:49:08.000 It's not like everybody's just stabbing everybody everywhere you look.

01:49:11.000 Most of the interactions that people have with each other all over the place are positive.

01:49:14.000 That's right.

01:49:15.000 It's a very small amount. 0.98

01:49:16.000 The problem is these small amounts make it on fucking YouTube and then that's all I can watch. 0.98

01:49:21.000 There you go! 0.99

01:49:22.000 I just watch these fucking people in Portland beat the shit out of each other and kick some guy in the head when he's sitting on his- he's sitting down when he apparently drove too close to these Antifa guys and they made him get out of the car and they're searching his belongings. 1.00

01:49:34.000 This guy runs up behind him and kicks him in the head and knocks him unconscious. 1.00

01:49:37.000 Horrible. 0.99

01:49:37.000 And I'm like, God damn it! 0.99

01:49:39.000 But it's not most people most of the time. 0.98

01:49:43.000 The problem is that's what everybody's gonna pay attention to.

01:49:45.000 That's what everybody's gonna share on Facebook and Instagram. 0.99

01:49:49.000 I saw that fucking video in my timeline like 30 times. 0.99

01:49:52.000 But this is what I love about humanity. 0.99

01:49:55.000 It's like if you strip away the story and you see a person getting kicked in the head.

01:50:01.000 Honestly, man, I don't care.

01:50:04.000 In general, I don't care what that guy is. 0.97

01:50:07.000 Don't kick him in the head. 0.94

01:50:09.000 Here's the problem, dude.

01:50:10.000 It's a natural inclination to want to fight the opposite of your tribe. 0.99

01:50:15.000 Yeah.

01:50:16.000 And when you're 16 years old or however old that kid was, the kid who kicked that guy in the head, he looked young to me.

01:50:21.000 I could have easily done that when I was 16. Easily.

01:50:24.000 I was so dumb. 0.67

01:50:25.000 If I was in the streets at 16 and we pulled some guy out of his car that someone said tried to run us over and the guy sitting there Easily. 0.98

01:50:34.000 Me or any of the people I hung out with would have punched that guy or kicked that guy. 0.94

01:50:38.000 That's the compassion!

01:50:39.000 That's normal.

01:50:39.000 It's normal.

01:50:40.000 The problem is the tribal war that we have going on.

01:50:44.000 That's the problem.

01:50:45.000 But what you just said, that's the truth.

01:50:48.000 That's the truth.

01:50:48.000 And it's compassionate.

01:50:50.000 This is a stupid kid. 1.00

01:50:52.000 I think he worked at the airport. 1.00

01:50:54.000 Whatever the fuck he was. 1.00

01:50:56.000 This is a stupid kid. 1.00

01:50:58.000 And what he did is wrong. 1.00

01:50:59.000 He got caught up in the wave of violence, the mob mentality.

01:51:03.000 It's normal.

01:51:04.000 We have to figure out...

01:51:05.000 Listen, man, here's the thing.

01:51:07.000 We must discover...

01:51:09.000 First of all, you're not going to find this on the map.

01:51:11.000 I like going off the map, but there's not a map for this.

01:51:14.000 So that's deliberating to me.

01:51:17.000 We've got to get off the map, number one.

01:51:19.000 We've got to get off the map.

01:51:21.000 This is what's so crazy.

01:51:24.000 People are really legitimately tuning in to human trafficking in the United States.

01:51:29.000 It's a big business.

01:51:31.000 It's one of the biggest businesses, actually.

01:51:33.000 Human trafficking?

01:51:35.000 Yeah, man!

01:51:35.000 I was reading a post today that somebody sent me, and I don't know if it's verified or real or whatever, where a girl was saying that she was headed to a bathroom at a gas station somewhere.

01:51:47.000 And someone, she noticed that someone had their camera turned around, so they had the selfie camera on while they were on FaceTime, and they pointed to this lady, and they said, what about her?

01:51:58.000 She heard her say, what about her?

01:52:00.000 Do you like her?

01:52:01.000 And the girl looked at them, and the lady turned and looked at her, and she ran back to her car, got in their car, and the guy who was with them went and ran up to the side of the car like she thinks they were trying to kidnap her.

01:52:12.000 100% they were.

01:52:13.000 And that...

01:52:15.000 That happens.

01:52:16.000 That's a real business. 0.99

01:52:18.000 This is not a fucking story. 0.99

01:52:21.000 This is not a magazine article where someone wrote some fiction. 0.99

01:52:25.000 Right.

01:52:26.000 And the funny thing, not funny, but what's ironic about the sudden horror at human trafficking is a lot of the very same people who are... 0.97

01:52:36.000 Fighting against this thing that they're they're realizing is happening in the country simultaneously Don't want to look back into the history of the United States which was a hundred percent based on human trafficking hundred percent our country's foundation is human trafficking they fucking kidnapped Black people and made them work for free.

01:52:57.000 And somewhere in between that horror and now, people have gotten this delusion that that stopped. 0.94

01:53:05.000 It didn't stop.

01:53:07.000 Our country was literally founded. 0.99

01:53:10.000 George Washington, did you know this, was the number one slaveholder in Virginia, wherever the fuck he was, he was the number one slave. 0.99

01:53:19.000 Supposedly his wooden teeth thing, it was slave teeth. 0.99

01:53:23.000 Yeah, he was the number one slave holder.

01:53:26.000 Yeah.

01:53:26.000 Did he have wooden gums?

01:53:28.000 Is that what it was?

01:53:28.000 I don't know.

01:53:29.000 The whole wooden teeth thing was a replacement of the truth, which is this motherfucker was a human trafficker. 0.99

01:53:33.000 So people try to like, they try to revise. 0.99

01:53:36.000 So the idea is like, Let's look at this, look at this.

01:53:39.000 Washington's dentures were likely sourced from the teeth of slaves.

01:53:42.000 Sourced!

01:53:42.000 There you go!

01:53:43.000 They're gonna say sourced! 1.00

01:53:44.000 That wasn't sourced, they were ripped out of the fucking mouth of human hostages. 1.00

01:53:49.000 Don't say sourced! 1.00

01:53:51.000 I source avocados to my fucking Mexican restaurant. 1.00

01:53:54.000 I don't source teeth, motherfucker! 1.00

01:53:56.000 Why would you use that language? 1.00

01:53:58.000 Why would you use that language?

01:53:59.000 Yeah, it's not sourced!

01:54:01.000 Go back to that, Jamie, can I read the rest of it?

01:54:03.000 Records at Mount Vernon show that he bought teeth from slaves.

01:54:08.000 Bought them!

01:54:09.000 But that's records.

01:54:11.000 Who knows if the slaves actually got the money?

01:54:13.000 The poor and enslaved had been selling teeth as a means of making money since the Middle Ages, which were sold as dentures or implants to those of financial means.

01:54:23.000 Either way, man. 0.91

01:54:24.000 So, you know, Jeffrey Epstein, Jeffrey Epstein sourced teeth from some of the young girls he was fucking, and it was actually common for the young girls to sell their teeth for money. 0.99

01:54:34.000 That right there is the root of the fucking problem. 0.99

01:54:40.000 George Washington was a human trafficker who had in his mouth the teeth of people that were kidnapped that he was making work for free. 1.00

01:54:51.000 This makes Dahmer look like a fucking boy scout! 1.00

01:54:54.000 Can you imagine? 1.00

01:54:55.000 Look at this quote.

01:54:58.000 According to George Washington's ledger on May 8th, 1784, he paid six pounds, two shillings to Negroes for nine teeth on account of Dr. LeMoyne.

01:55:11.000 So he paid six pounds, two shillings, I don't know how much that is.

01:55:16.000 Who cares?

01:55:17.000 For nine teeth.

01:55:19.000 So this says, does it say he's paying it to the slaves?

01:55:26.000 Nine doesn't.

01:55:26.000 Actually said they don't know if they were slaves or not.

01:55:29.000 Probably paid it to the doctor to extract it.

01:55:31.000 Jesus Christ.

01:55:33.000 So there were free black men that lived in America, but what was the percentage versus slaves and free men?

01:55:41.000 Who cares? 1.00

01:55:42.000 The main thing is this asshole who's in statues everywhere was a kidnapper who took teeth out of people's mouths and put it in his own mouth. 1.00

01:55:50.000 That's fucked up. 1.00

01:55:52.000 Everybody's fucked up in all of our holidays. 1.00

01:55:56.000 Like, Columbus was one of the worst people of all time. 1.00

01:55:59.000 Yeah. 0.99

01:56:00.000 So this whole, like, when people are defending the statues, it's like, shut the fuck up. 0.98

01:56:03.000 But here's the thing, man. 0.96

01:56:05.000 Should you allow people to just pull down the statues?

01:56:08.000 Really?

01:56:08.000 Yep.

01:56:09.000 What do you think?

01:56:10.000 Because, do you think, here's what I think.

01:56:11.000 What if there were Jeffrey Dahmer statues all over LA? No, you make a good point.

01:56:16.000 Maybe we should educate people on why you feel so strongly about the George Washington statue or even the Thomas Jefferson statue. 0.99

01:56:25.000 A lot of people are arguing that Thomas Jefferson, that he's a piece of shit and we shouldn't respect him either. 0.93

01:56:34.000 Do you think that all those statues should come down or do you think it's more of an imperative for us to understand that In the world of 1776, or in the world of whenever, when did Washington get here? 0.99

01:56:50.000 What was George Washington's first years in America?

01:56:56.000 I'm not in any way, shape, or form giving anyone a free pass on owning slaves.

01:57:04.000 I don't think anybody thinks you're doing that, man.

01:57:06.000 That's not what I'm saying. 1.00

01:57:06.000 Anybody who thinks that about you is stupid. 1.00

01:57:08.000 But what I am saying is, I think human beings He was born in Virginia. 1.00

01:57:14.000 Oh, he was born in America.

01:57:15.000 Great grandfather.

01:57:16.000 George Washington.

01:57:18.000 One of the first real Americans.

01:57:19.000 1656. Jeffrey Dahmer, one of the first real Americans.

01:57:21.000 That's it. 1.00

01:57:21.000 Fuck it. 1.00

01:57:21.000 I'm getting a George Washington tattoo. 1.00

01:57:23.000 Joe!

01:57:24.000 I'm in.

01:57:24.000 I'm in!

01:57:25.000 What's wrong with you?

01:57:26.000 Hey! 0.99

01:57:26.000 He's American! 0.99

01:57:30.000 The statue question.

01:57:31.000 This is what I think.

01:57:33.000 Either take the statue down or put around it the number of slaves he had.

01:57:39.000 Build statues for all the slaves he had.

01:57:40.000 So if George Washington had 4,000 slaves, there needs to be a field of slave statues around the George Washington statue that you have to walk through to get to the George Washington statue.

01:57:50.000 Or just pull it down.

01:57:52.000 Because you know what?

01:57:52.000 It's easier to pull it down.

01:57:53.000 No, no, no, no, no.

01:57:54.000 You're right, though.

01:57:56.000 Have the slaves and have some of them missing teeth because they sold it to him because they needed some...

01:58:00.000 We'd have to find out if he really bought teeth from slaves or if it's just regular folks who needed money.

01:58:04.000 Just have the whole story there.

01:58:06.000 Like, that's all.

01:58:07.000 Just have the whole story so people don't realize what's happening.

01:58:09.000 What you're saying is perfect.

01:58:10.000 Like, if you're gonna have a guy who victimized I mean, everybody did it back then.

01:58:15.000 Everybody of wealth did it.

01:58:16.000 It was a normal thing to do to have people that you owned.

01:58:19.000 As crazy as that sounds to us.

01:58:21.000 Dude, I think that the world before mass communication, before the post office, and certainly before any kind of boat travel, when everyone was just either on foot or on horses, was undeniably...

01:58:40.000 Impossible for us to understand because they were so savage.

01:58:45.000 There was very few rules. 0.98

01:58:46.000 People were just dying of syphilis and every other fucking disease that came around the bend, whether it was the flu or the plague. 0.99

01:58:54.000 There was no sanitation. 1.00

01:58:56.000 Everyone was a rapist. 0.98

01:58:57.000 It was just a...

01:58:59.000 A wild, barely human thing that would occasionally paint cool things and write things down and compose music, but lived in a savage environment that's almost unrecognizable for us today.

01:59:14.000 Look, and again, man, I'm presenting a counterpoint to you that...

01:59:20.000 I don't want people to pray upon me for the counterpoint saying, oh, woke Duncan had a baby, got all woke.

01:59:26.000 But I do want to present a counterpoint with the intention of like, let's look at maybe that Is actually part of the conditioning.

01:59:37.000 So if your country is based on human trafficking, which to this day is happening.

01:59:44.000 Well, this country is based on human trafficking.

01:59:47.000 And it's also based on human sacrifice. 0.82

01:59:50.000 It's also based on us killing the people that were here first. 0.98

01:59:53.000 That's right.

01:59:54.000 And we've been at war for 92% of our history.

01:59:57.000 And many of those wars are based on nothing. 0.99

01:59:59.000 So, you know, people are up in arms about the Bohemian Grove, but it's like, give me a fucking break. 0.98

02:00:04.000 Look at Vietnam. 0.99

02:00:05.000 That's human sacrifice.

02:00:06.000 There was money to be made from killing people and they made money.

02:00:09.000 So we have a country that's based on human trafficking and human sacrifice.

02:00:13.000 Nobody wants to talk about it.

02:00:15.000 The idea is the exact same thing that all abusers do to people they've abused. 0.99

02:00:20.000 They want you to, number one, forget it, and if you start remembering it, they tell you you're crazy or that you're fucked up. 0.97

02:00:26.000 So, the idea is that, like, the world prior to the United States was a savage world. 0.99

02:00:31.000 Savage.

02:00:31.000 Africa was not savage.

02:00:33.000 These were very advanced people, but... 0.80

02:00:36.000 Because the Europeans were savage. 1.00

02:00:40.000 We're brutal people. 1.00

02:00:42.000 They went in there and fucking just started chopping people up. 1.00

02:00:45.000 These are people who had a natural innate trust for other humans. 0.99

02:00:49.000 And they were like, put your hand out!

02:00:51.000 Slap! 1.00

02:00:52.000 Go get some gold or I'll cut your other one off! 1.00

02:00:54.000 That's what they did when they came here to North America. 1.00

02:00:56.000 It was hills have eyes level.

02:00:58.000 So the hills have eyes roll into all indigenous cultures. 0.97

02:01:02.000 They're in tune with the earth.

02:01:03.000 When she gets weird, they move.

02:01:05.000 Look, I'm not saying...

02:01:06.000 Here's the thing.

02:01:07.000 I've been spending the last six months deeply engrossed in Native American books.

02:01:11.000 And they weren't that nice.

02:01:12.000 Not at all, dude.

02:01:13.000 They ate each other.

02:01:15.000 The Nez Perce were, like, practicing cannibals. 1.00

02:01:18.000 The Nez Perce? 1.00

02:01:19.000 Yeah, the Nez Perce Indians were practicing cannibals. 1.00

02:01:21.000 Okay.

02:01:21.000 Listen, man, the Comanches killed everybody.

02:01:23.000 They were brutal. 0.83

02:01:24.000 They killed everybody. 0.96

02:01:25.000 They killed each other. 0.90

02:01:26.000 They killed Native Americans. 0.99

02:01:28.000 Their main thing was raiding. 1.00

02:01:29.000 They'd raid tribes and steal and kill and murder and rape. 0.85

02:01:32.000 The idea I've heard, and this may not be, I didn't look into it, and I apologize to the people who told me about this idea, because I wish I'd researched it more, but I'm going to put it out there, is that Africa, Was a really ancient culture that was...

02:01:47.000 Dude, Africa's where Egypt is. 1.00

02:01:48.000 Yes.

02:01:48.000 Wrap your head around that.

02:01:49.000 Exactly.

02:01:50.000 That's what people don't recognize.

02:01:51.000 And people were sending people there to get educated before slavery even started.

02:01:56.000 Dude, before they burned the Library of Alexandria, that was the place where everybody would go to learn things. 0.97

02:02:01.000 Yes, and so we fucking went in there and just wreaked havoc. 0.95

02:02:04.000 Not us. 0.98

02:02:05.000 It wasn't us.

02:02:06.000 We can't say we.

02:02:08.000 I'm sorry.

02:02:09.000 You're from North Carolina.

02:02:09.000 I love that I burped.

02:02:10.000 I was born in New Jersey.

02:02:11.000 We can't say we.

02:02:12.000 We can't.

02:02:13.000 You made a very profound point and I burped.

02:02:17.000 But we didn't do it!

02:02:18.000 No, I don't mean we.

02:02:19.000 I don't mean we.

02:02:20.000 I'm not saying I'm directly connected.

02:02:22.000 I'm just saying, for me, it's like, any time I get around any situation where someone is making it so I can't say the truth, I get really annoyed.

02:02:32.000 Yes, yes.

02:02:33.000 Which is why you're a comic.

02:02:34.000 It freaks me out, yes.

02:02:35.000 And it freaks me out.

02:02:37.000 And so, the reason that the whole, like...

02:02:41.000 Whatever the particular movement is, like when Trump is at Mount Rushmore, and that's Lakota, right? 0.99

02:02:48.000 That's like sacred land.

02:02:50.000 That's like sacred land.

02:02:51.000 But they went in there and they chopped up a mountain with a bunch of slave owners' faces, and Trump's like, it's the best mountain on earth!

02:03:01.000 It's like, it looks better before you put the human traffickers on it, right? 0.97

02:03:06.000 How about the fucking hilarity of him suggesting that his face should be on it just to rile people up? 0.98

02:03:12.000 Yeah. 0.98

02:03:13.000 There's some part of you as a comic that has to appreciate that.

02:03:16.000 I'm sorry, Joe.

02:03:17.000 I'm gonna admit that's true.

02:03:20.000 When I saw that he was suggesting that his name should be on Mount Everest, or not at Mount Everest, Mount Rushmore, I was thinking immediately, like, oh my god, he's moving them into Checkmate. 0.97

02:03:32.000 Dude, look at my fucking Twitter.

02:03:33.000 I've been like seven different personalities designed to rile people up over the last month. 0.99

02:03:37.000 That's all you do with this QAnon thing.

02:03:40.000 Jamie was hoping you would come in as your QAnon character.

02:03:44.000 It's fine.

02:03:45.000 Look, no, but like, should that person be president?

02:03:48.000 No.

02:03:48.000 Listen, but that's hilarious.

02:03:50.000 In this madness, with all this crazy, there's no such thing as gender world, for a guy to come around and say, I'm going to put my face on Mount Rushmore.

02:03:58.000 There's part of that that I like.

02:04:01.000 Well, listen.

02:04:01.000 I'm going to be honest.

02:04:03.000 I'm not a fan of his lack of empathy.

02:04:05.000 That's what's beautiful about you, is you're not afraid to admit something that I think is really important to admit, which is like...

02:04:13.000 Dude, there's a continuum of reality and there's swaths of that continuum that are amazing.

02:04:23.000 I don't know if you've ever been in a situation where maybe you're in a kind of relationship that's not great.

02:04:33.000 But there's a piece of that relationship that is so fucking hot and so sexy and so beautiful in the midst of all the madness that it almost like makes the madness make sense, right?

02:04:45.000 That's a, that's a, or certainly like there's certain like substances I imbibe that if you look at what they do to my body, it's like terrible, but like that sliver of whatever it is is great.

02:04:57.000 So anyway, what I love that you're not afraid of doing It's like putting out there like look man It's not like people are one thing Here's the thing too.

02:05:08.000 I'm not a willing Victim of gaslighting you can't you can't do that to me, right?

02:05:16.000 I'm not interested, you know, I don't need anything from you I'm not interested in you gaslighting me.

02:05:23.000 I know when someone's putting on a show I had an email from a guy who I like Who told me to stop talking about Joe Biden because all the problems are because he has a stutter.

02:05:31.000 I'm like, listen, man, when you're 74, or however old he is, he's older than that, right?

02:05:37.000 The wheels come off, man, on everybody.

02:05:40.000 Right.

02:05:41.000 I don't feel as sharp at 53 as I did at 33. How about that?

02:05:46.000 Yeah. 0.99

02:05:47.000 The reality is there's days if I'm not on top of my fucking game, I get real spacey. 0.99

02:05:52.000 Yeah. 0.99

02:05:52.000 What happens in 25 years? 0.99

02:05:55.000 Come on, man.

02:05:56.000 Are we pretending that we live forever?

02:05:59.000 We need young, vibrant, robust people with a lot of energy who are also advanced thinkers.

02:06:07.000 And right now, they don't have any one of those people in the race.

02:06:10.000 We got craziness in the race.

02:06:12.000 You know, man, the thing with Biden is...

02:06:16.000 Forget about Biden. 1.00

02:06:18.000 I'm voting for fucking Biden. 1.00

02:06:20.000 You're going to suck my dick. 1.00

02:06:21.000 I'm voting for Biden. 1.00

02:06:22.000 Do we have to do that?

02:06:23.000 Are you going to do it anyway? 1.00

02:06:25.000 Do we just not suck your dick? 1.00

02:06:27.000 Why can't I get a blowjob on top of voting for Biden? 1.00

02:06:30.000 I mean, you can, but it seems greedy. 1.00

02:06:31.000 It would be nice.

02:06:33.000 Look, I'm sorry to be aggressive, man.

02:06:35.000 This liquor, it's bringing out something bad to me.

02:06:37.000 That's what I love about whiskey.

02:06:39.000 Whiskey's been responsible for some of my favorite conversations.

02:06:42.000 Look, man.

02:06:42.000 Shout out to Buffalo Trace.

02:06:44.000 The reality of the situation is, like, Biden, I don't like his policy regarding drugs, and I'm very resentful of a lot of the things he's done, and I'm also very resentful of the fact that...

02:06:56.000 That's what I'm like being...

02:06:57.000 That's the binary that I'm being forced to contend with here.

02:07:01.000 That's the resentment, right?

02:07:02.000 Is that we only have these two sanctioned choices.

02:07:05.000 And if you're a good person who doesn't want people to die in the streets, you have to vote blue. 0.83

02:07:11.000 That's it.

02:07:12.000 Period!

02:07:12.000 That's it.

02:07:13.000 And the initial phases of it when I was trying to like... 0.99

02:07:16.000 I was hoping Bernie would be the fucking frontrunner. 0.99

02:07:19.000 And I'm like... 1.00

02:07:20.000 I fucked Bernie up, dude. 0.98

02:07:22.000 Bernie got attached to some jokes. 0.99

02:07:23.000 Yeah.

02:07:24.000 What do you mean?

02:07:25.000 Bernie came on my podcast, and I did a very lukewarm endorsement of Bernie.

02:07:30.000 Look, I can't do stand-up right now, so I'll just tell you this.

02:07:33.000 Bernie did this very lukewarm...

02:07:35.000 I said, I'll probably vote.

02:07:38.000 I had my friend Barry Weiss on from the New York Times, and she said, who are you going to vote for?

02:07:42.000 I said, I'll probably vote for Bernie.

02:07:44.000 I said he makes sense.

02:07:45.000 I like what he stands for.

02:07:46.000 The guy's been rock solid his whole life.

02:07:48.000 It would be good to have a change where someone gets into office where you go, this guy really believes in justice.

02:07:53.000 He's not greedy.

02:07:55.000 He's not beholding the corporations.

02:07:58.000 They ran with that. 0.99

02:07:59.000 And then all these people that were in competition with Bernie started pulling shit that I've said on the podcast, drunk, high as fuck, stand-up comedy, put it in content. 1.00

02:08:10.000 So annoying. 1.00

02:08:10.000 Put it in quotes. 1.00

02:08:12.000 I remember that.

02:08:13.000 And there was one of them.

02:08:14.000 I read this article.

02:08:15.000 It was on a real newspaper. 1.00

02:08:19.000 Where, in quotes, it said he believes that lesbians lack the lower back muscles to fuck a woman correctly. 1.00

02:08:28.000 What? 1.00

02:08:28.000 This is a piece of my act. 1.00

02:08:30.000 It was a bit.

02:08:31.000 It was a bit about a conversation that I had at a bar.

02:08:33.000 I was with a friend of mine at a bar, and there's this lady who's really aggressive, who's making out with her girlfriend, and she yells over at us. 1.00

02:08:39.000 She goes, sorry, boys.

02:08:40.000 She only likes girls. 1.00

02:08:41.000 And I got my own dick. 1.00

02:08:44.000 She says this to us. 1.00

02:08:45.000 Yeah.

02:08:46.000 So I go, where is it?

02:08:47.000 And she goes, it's a strap-on. 1.00

02:08:49.000 And I said, having a strap-on thinking it's a dick is like having a lighter and thinking you're a dragon. 1.00

02:08:55.000 Plus, everyone knows that lesbians lack the proper lower back muscles to fuck a woman correctly. 1.00

02:09:00.000 It was like, I was in this sparring match, this verbal sparring match with this crazy lady. 1.00

02:09:04.000 That's what I said. 0.99

02:09:05.000 You can't just take that part out and put it in quotes and say, I really believe that lesbians lack the proper lower back muscles to be in a loving relationship with another woman who's also a lesbian. 1.00

02:09:17.000 That's not what I said, bitch. 1.00

02:09:18.000 I can't trust you on anything. 1.00

02:09:19.000 How am I going to trust you with Russia or climate change or anything when you lie about jokes?

02:09:24.000 Because they didn't want a guy who wasn't beholden to the system.

02:09:28.000 So there was two people that I was interested in.

02:09:30.000 Tulsi Gabbard.

02:09:32.000 She's been a congresswoman for six years. 0.95

02:09:34.000 I love her.

02:09:34.000 She served overseas twice.

02:09:37.000 Rock solid.

02:09:38.000 She's a real leader.

02:09:39.000 And they didn't want to have nothing to do with her.

02:09:41.000 You know Tulsi is a plant that Hari Krishnas sing to? 0.62

02:09:45.000 Good.

02:09:46.000 I hope they get in.

02:09:47.000 Let's give it a chance.

02:09:48.000 Maybe they're right.

02:09:49.000 They've seen those Hari Krishnas. 1.00

02:09:52.000 I mean, I'm like really eating my ass here because like there was a period where I'm like, you know what? 1.00

02:09:58.000 Fuck this. 1.00

02:09:59.000 I'm not gonna let the fucking Democratic Party shove this motherfucker who's like, who's like pro all these... 1.00

02:10:05.000 What happens if he dies? 1.00

02:10:07.000 Kamala becomes president.

02:10:08.000 And then does she have to get a new vice president? 1.00

02:10:10.000 Who does she get as a vice president? 1.00

02:10:11.000 I think she would have to get a vice president. 1.00

02:10:13.000 She gets AOC. I love AOC. You don't have to be a certain age to be vice president.

02:10:17.000 Dude, I love AOC. I don't give a fuck what anybody says about her. 1.00

02:10:20.000 She's wonderful. 0.99

02:10:20.000 I love her. 0.99

02:10:21.000 She's awesome. 0.83

02:10:23.000 Eat me alive! 0.82

02:10:24.000 I don't care! 0.96

02:10:25.000 Look at me!

02:10:25.000 Who cares?

02:10:26.000 Listen, I think she's awesome.

02:10:28.000 I love her so much. 0.98

02:10:29.000 And I'm gonna get shit for it, too. 0.97

02:10:30.000 But I think the errors that she makes, she makes because she has this idea that she's trying to do good. 0.98

02:10:36.000 I really believe that.

02:10:37.000 She is.

02:10:38.000 She's also 30! 0.99

02:10:39.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:10:40.000 How fucking dumb were you when you were 30? 1.00

02:10:42.000 Right. 1.00

02:10:42.000 You know, one of the things about Bridget Phetasy is hilarious. 1.00

02:10:45.000 That's a great point.

02:10:45.000 Bridget Phetasy is amazing.

02:10:47.000 What happened here?

02:10:48.000 You have to be 35 to be vice president.

02:10:49.000 Sorry, AOC. Hang in there in the wings, baby!

02:10:52.000 We will vote for you, AOC! I will vote for you!

02:10:56.000 I think she's trying to do good.

02:10:58.000 Bridget Phetasy, who's one of my favorite people to talk to, she said that when she read a diary that she wrote or a journal that she wrote when she was 24, she's like, Jesus Christ, I was AOC. And now she's much more of a centrist.

02:11:11.000 In fact, she's always mocking woke shit. 0.99

02:11:13.000 And she's like, but I was like full on woke when I was 24. I get it. 1.00

02:11:17.000 It's a thing of a person being a good person who's compassionate, who wants to do good for people, who thinks they're moving in the right direction.

02:11:25.000 But the problem is it's not in a line with the understanding that we have currently of psychology and of how people behave and of laws and the idea of punishment and crime.

02:11:37.000 You have to have some of that stuff.

02:11:39.000 You have to have incentives for people to do well, but you also have to have disincentives for them.

02:11:44.000 They have to be punished if they commit crimes.

02:11:46.000 You have to have law and order, but you have to have compassion.

02:11:49.000 You have to have goodwill, but you have to have law.

02:11:52.000 You have to model it on good parenting, man.

02:11:55.000 That's what it should be modeled on.

02:11:57.000 And also good community.

02:11:59.000 I think parenting is one aspect of your ability to develop growing up.

02:12:06.000 Neighbors are important too, man.

02:12:07.000 Friends.

02:12:08.000 Absolutely.

02:12:09.000 Uncles.

02:12:09.000 All those people are important in your life.

02:12:11.000 Aunts.

02:12:12.000 Your grandparents. 1.00

02:12:14.000 There's a lot of shit going on. 1.00

02:12:16.000 There's input coming into a person. 0.99

02:12:17.000 I just love thinking what's outside of propaganda.

02:12:21.000 Parenting, it isn't outside of propaganda, but you can, as a parent, I can see, like, look, it doesn't matter what my ideals are regarding regulation.

02:12:32.000 It doesn't matter.

02:12:32.000 Forrest is not going to be allowed to go into the pool unless I'm there with him.

02:12:38.000 100%. 0.98

02:12:39.000 He'll die! 1.00

02:12:40.000 He'll die.

02:12:40.000 So there's like real, like, there's like a true, like, to me, there's an eternal sort of path in, like, looking at what good parenting is across cultures.

02:12:51.000 And you realize, like, you know... 0.99

02:12:54.000 You're an idiot if you think that people in the vast number of humans on earth, if you think that people in that vast number aren't insane, like what percentage are insane? 1.00

02:13:04.000 Well, you're insane. 1.00

02:13:05.000 Everybody's insane. 1.00

02:13:06.000 What is sane? 0.64

02:13:07.000 That's the problem.

02:13:08.000 What is that metric? 0.99

02:13:10.000 You know, a fucking yard is three feet. 1.00

02:13:13.000 What's sane? 1.00

02:13:14.000 I'm talking like people who are like...

02:13:17.000 Registered sex offenders, you know what I mean? 0.99

02:13:19.000 That pathos, true narcissist, true sociopaths.

02:13:24.000 We live in a world where from time to time...

02:13:27.000 But it's still a spectrum, right?

02:13:28.000 Because what if someone's sane but they're a gambling addict and they keep losing all their family's money over here in poker games?

02:13:34.000 Right.

02:13:34.000 We've got to figure out a way to help them without simultaneously creating tyranny.

02:13:38.000 Have you fucked with Ibogaine? 1.00

02:13:40.000 No, I don't want it, man. 1.00

02:13:41.000 I'm terrified of that shit. 1.00

02:13:42.000 I haven't fucked with ayahuasca. 1.00

02:13:43.000 I smoke DMT from time to time. 0.97

02:13:44.000 But I'm scared of a six-hour DMT trip, much less Ibogaine freak.

02:13:49.000 Have you done Ibogaine?

02:13:50.000 No.

02:13:51.000 I don't have any, like, physical addictions that I'm trying to kick.

02:13:55.000 Or real personal addictions.

02:13:57.000 I've kind of got those things dialed in in terms of my workout and, you know, work schedule and family schedule.

02:14:05.000 It's pretty good right now.

02:14:06.000 I got a good harmony.

02:14:07.000 I got a good rhythm and I'm gonna keep that up.

02:14:09.000 Yeah.

02:14:09.000 But people that I know that have really needed it are people that got hurt and then they got prescribed pain pills and the pain pills is what got them.

02:14:19.000 I know quite a few people that have turned to the Ibogaine.

02:14:23.000 Two good friends that have turned to the Ibogaine and it knocked them right off of the addiction and right back on path.

02:14:29.000 And it's really disturbing to me because it doesn't seem to be killing people and it's not legal.

02:14:34.000 And I think going forward in this country... 0.99

02:14:38.000 We're going to have to come to grips with a bunch of shit. 0.99

02:14:41.000 One of the things we're going to have to come to grips with is we've got, and this is not a bad thing, okay? 0.99

02:14:46.000 If any company is allowed to donate to a political candidate, any company, a fucking, you know... 0.96

02:14:53.000 Any company. 0.97

02:14:54.000 Chocolate company, a company that makes cars, then a drug company probably should too.

02:14:59.000 If they're allowed to sell drugs, maybe they should be allowed to give money to corporations or give money, rather, to politicians that are running for government. 0.95

02:15:09.000 Why not?

02:15:11.000 Everybody can do it. 0.99

02:15:12.000 Who's to say they can't and the fucking guys who make cars can when they're polluting the air? 0.99

02:15:16.000 Okay? 0.99

02:15:17.000 Who knows?

02:15:18.000 But at the end of the day, we have to go, yo, there's a lot of people getting hooked on these pills.

02:15:24.000 There's a lot of people ruining their lives on these pills.

02:15:27.000 And we're turning a blind eye because there's a lot of money involved in these pills.

02:15:31.000 And it's weird.

02:15:33.000 It's weird.

02:15:34.000 It's weird like the cigarette thing.

02:15:35.000 If we're so worried about 170,000 people dying of COVID, why aren't we worried about half a million dying from cigarettes?

02:15:41.000 Why aren't we worried about all the people that are not just dying, but losing their sanity on opioids? 0.99

02:15:48.000 How many people in this country are hooked on fucking pain pills? 0.99

02:15:52.000 Do we even know the real number? 1.00

02:15:54.000 Because how many people are functional?

02:15:55.000 Where they're hooked on it, but they're just taking one or two a day, and they're just going to work every day? 0.89

02:15:59.000 And they just stay in a steady haze of fucking working for fucking Hertz Rent-A-Car, and they've got a prescription, so it's all good. 0.97

02:16:07.000 Doctor says heroin's good. 0.99

02:16:08.000 Brave new world, baby.

02:16:09.000 Brave new world.

02:16:12.000 These are all the things that I think of.

02:16:14.000 This is the perspective that I have in this day and age right now, as I'm talking to you, a place of humility.

02:16:23.000 Because I'm more aware now than any other time in my life that no one is in control of this thing.

02:16:30.000 And that we all have to just stop thinking that daddy's gonna rescue us.

02:16:35.000 That's right.

02:16:35.000 Because there is no daddy.

02:16:37.000 Garcetti's not your daddy.

02:16:38.000 Gavin Newsom's not your daddy.

02:16:40.000 Donald Trump's not your daddy.

02:16:42.000 Nancy Pelosi is not your mama. 0.58

02:16:44.000 None of these things, these are just people.

02:16:46.000 And we have to look at this in an objective.

02:16:49.000 First of all, anyone who's famous.

02:16:51.000 Anyone.

02:16:51.000 I don't care if you're Donald Trump or Nancy Pelosi.

02:16:53.000 Those are famous people.

02:16:54.000 Everybody knows their name.

02:16:55.000 Everybody knows what they look like.

02:16:57.000 That's a wild way to live.

02:16:59.000 That's a wild, crazy way to live.

02:17:02.000 Yeah.

02:17:02.000 That's a crazy way to live.

02:17:03.000 And then you're out there also dictating what people can and can't do.

02:17:07.000 And you're also dictating where the taxes go.

02:17:09.000 You're not.

02:17:10.000 The idea is like, by becoming famous, you become antithetical to the very thing that you're representing.

02:17:16.000 So how can you represent it anymore if you have...

02:17:19.000 I'm not saying you can't.

02:17:21.000 But I'm saying that's a different ride.

02:17:24.000 That's a different ride.

02:17:25.000 That's a different ride than a regular person.

02:17:26.000 If you're a famous person and you're all of a sudden at the helm of an empire that's dropping drone bombs on people... 1.00

02:17:35.000 Fuck you. 1.00

02:17:36.000 Shouldn't the greatest government be a government that has an idea of eventually there'll be no more government? 1.00

02:17:41.000 There should be, but... 0.99

02:17:43.000 Then you have shit like 9-11. 0.99

02:17:45.000 You go, what happened? 1.00

02:17:46.000 We get attacked.

02:17:47.000 But did we?

02:17:48.000 I don't know.

02:17:49.000 I don't know what happened.

02:17:51.000 What happened?

02:17:52.000 I don't know.

02:17:52.000 Who trained those people?

02:17:54.000 Who designed that?

02:17:55.000 A lot of things happen afterwards that people will say, did those things that happened afterwards happen because, and this is my belief, my belief is that All the things that happened after 9-11 in terms of the Patriot Act and all these other things, they happened because people were taking advantage of an opening where they recognized that a lot of people were scared,

02:18:12.000 and then they started implementing these ideas that they would love to do during peacetime, but they would never be accepted.

02:18:18.000 That's my...

02:18:19.000 The dogs of war.

02:18:20.000 But this is my interpretation.

02:18:21.000 Some people are under the impression that they actually orchestrated the event and then Afterwards, implementing these new rules and everybody went along with it because of the event they orchestrated. 0.90

02:18:32.000 Now, I'm not saying I know that that's not the case, and this is what's the scariest fucking thing to admit.

02:18:37.000 When you know about Operation Northwoods, you know that the government in 1963 was literally planning on blowing up a jet airliner and blaming it on Cuba. 0.84

02:18:46.000 They were going to arm Cuban friendlies and attack Guantanamo Bay. 0.83

02:18:50.000 They're going to do whatever they could to get us into a war with Cuba.

02:18:53.000 This was signed by the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

02:18:55.000 They're like, I like it.

02:18:57.000 I like deception.

02:18:59.000 I like what you're gonna do. 1.00

02:19:01.000 You're gonna kill people. 1.00

02:19:02.000 Woo! 1.00

02:19:03.000 Let's go to war, baby! 0.96

02:19:05.000 Go to war. 0.80

02:19:06.000 If they did that in, was it 62 or 63?

02:19:11.000 Who knows how that's evolved?

02:19:14.000 Why wouldn't that evolve?

02:19:17.000 Everything evolves.

02:19:18.000 Technology evolves.

02:19:21.000 Biology evolves.

02:19:22.000 Everything evolves.

02:19:24.000 Everything evolves.

02:19:24.000 You know what evolved?

02:19:25.000 What evolved was not the technique.

02:19:28.000 What evolved was the story.

02:19:30.000 The technique seems to be the same. 1.00

02:19:31.000 You look at the news, that Putin opponent He fucking keels over in an airplane, moaning, screaming. 0.99

02:19:40.000 On a plane, all he had to drink was tea. 0.99

02:19:42.000 The Kremlin apparently says, we wish him a speedy recovery. 1.00

02:19:46.000 And everyone's like, what the fuck?! 1.00

02:19:48.000 And it's like, wait, actually, the use of poison in imperialism is a pretty classic, basic technique.

02:19:56.000 Like, not just in Game of Thrones, but in general, if you're an imperialist and your interest is power, You use whatever technique you have to use.

02:20:06.000 Doesn't that technique and using it in that way point to this thing that we're really worried about?

02:20:12.000 What we're really worried about is there's this underlying narrative that's going on where these elites are battling it out and these warlords and these evil sociopaths that run the world are battling it out.

02:20:26.000 Well, they don't think they're evil.

02:20:27.000 But they don't do it. 0.92

02:20:28.000 They don't just have a guy just fucking blow his brains out on the airplane and then just jump right off on the tarmac and then he gets rescued by the Russian police and then nobody says anything about it ever. 0.95

02:20:37.000 No. 0.98

02:20:38.000 They do it in a weird sneaky way.

02:20:40.000 Yeah.

02:20:40.000 Where it's like there's some plausible deniability involved.

02:20:43.000 Right.

02:20:43.000 Well, number one, they don't think they're evil.

02:20:46.000 Putin doesn't wake up in the morning and look in the mirror and go, I'm an evil jackal.

02:20:51.000 What are the henchmen of the apocalypse?

02:20:53.000 Putin probably wakes up in the morning.

02:20:55.000 I imagine he stretches.

02:20:57.000 He looks at his phone.

02:20:58.000 He's got texts from his friends. 1.00

02:21:00.000 He's like, that motherfucker. 1.00

02:21:01.000 Fuck that bitch. 1.00

02:21:02.000 And then more than likely he probably exercises. 1.00

02:21:05.000 I bet a lot of times Putin wakes up in the morning and is like, I don't want to go to work. 0.99

02:21:10.000 I've had a lot of times he's like, God damn it, I just want to fuck off all day. 0.99

02:21:13.000 Then he has to go to work, he's stuck being Putin. 1.00

02:21:16.000 Trump wakes up in the morning, same problem. 1.00

02:21:18.000 He's like, this sucks. 1.00

02:21:19.000 He's drinking Diet Coke, watching Fox News, tweeting out crazy shit. 1.00

02:21:23.000 He wakes up in the morning, takes whatever the fucking drug he's on. 1.00

02:21:27.000 What do you think he's taking? 1.00

02:21:28.000 Dude, I don't know, but I want some of it.

02:21:30.000 Well, if you had a guess.

02:21:31.000 He's on some kind of amphetamine, I would say.

02:21:34.000 I don't know what it is.

02:21:35.000 Some sort of diet pill.

02:21:36.000 Was it ever confirmed that that whole thing where they said they found the very Dwayne Reed pharmacy in New York City where he had been taking amphetamines?

02:21:44.000 I'm not going to beat up somebody for being on drugs.

02:21:46.000 Listen to me, man.

02:21:47.000 He's 74. He wins.

02:21:50.000 Okay?

02:21:50.000 If you can make that much money while you're on amphetamines, And you don't die, then they're right.

02:21:56.000 The doctors are right.

02:21:57.000 The doctors are like, it's safe.

02:21:58.000 He's like, you sure?

02:21:58.000 I want to make money.

02:21:59.000 I want to keep going.

02:22:00.000 I don't want to sleep. 1.00

02:22:01.000 Like, just take this shit. 1.00

02:22:02.000 You don't have to sleep. 1.00

02:22:03.000 And he just keeps going. 1.00

02:22:03.000 He rattles off fucking campaign speeches and hops in a helicopter and flies a thousand miles away. 1.00

02:22:08.000 Find me a 70-year-old not on drugs, and I will give you $100. 1.00

02:22:17.000 Give me a fucking break! 1.00

02:22:19.000 You're 70! 1.00

02:22:20.000 You're gonna die in like 20 years! 0.66

02:22:22.000 That's so true. 1.00

02:22:23.000 You're gonna die! 0.69

02:22:24.000 When I'm 70, oh, my mouth is gonna be like a baby bird underneath any drugs that he wants to put in. 0.99

02:22:31.000 Of course.

02:22:31.000 We're both high now.

02:22:32.000 Yeah, drugs are fine.

02:22:34.000 I don't care if Trump is on drugs or Putin's on drugs or whoever's on drugs.

02:22:37.000 The problem is that we like to imagine Trump wakes up in the morning and is like, let me destroy this country. 0.50

02:22:46.000 Trump wakes up in the morning in a haze. 0.93

02:22:49.000 He takes some weird drugs.

02:22:50.000 He tries to remember what he's doing. 0.99

02:22:52.000 I promise you, every morning he thinks to himself, Why the fuck did I listen to my kid? 0.99

02:22:59.000 I guarantee it was this kid who's like, Dad, you gotta run for president. 0.99

02:23:02.000 No, no, no, no, no, no.

02:23:04.000 I don't think he wants to be president.

02:23:06.000 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 1.00

02:23:08.000 It was Obama talking shit about him. 1.00

02:23:11.000 Oh, my God. 1.00

02:23:12.000 100%.

02:23:12.000 When Obama was doing that dinner, You know that thing that they do every year where they have comedians go up?

02:23:21.000 What's it called again, Jamie?

02:23:22.000 The Press Roast.

02:23:23.000 White House Correspondents' Dinner.

02:23:24.000 Yeah, White House Correspondents' Dinner. 0.87

02:23:26.000 And Donald Trump's in the audience, and Barack Obama's going deep, and he's hitting him with some bombs.

02:23:33.000 It was good, too.

02:23:34.000 It was good.

02:23:34.000 And one of the things he hits him with is, here's one thing I am that you'll never be, President of the United States.

02:23:40.000 And everybody goes, oh!

02:23:42.000 It's like, you know that meme with the kid in the hoodie?

02:23:44.000 Yes!

02:23:44.000 With the glasses?

02:23:45.000 And he's just standing there, and all the other kids are running around going, oh!

02:23:49.000 He summoned a demon!

02:23:51.000 Can we hear some of this, or will we get in trouble?

02:23:53.000 I don't know.

02:23:53.000 It was a brutal roast.

02:23:55.000 Is that like public domain or anything?

02:23:57.000 I don't know.

02:23:57.000 Do you think he wrote it?

02:23:58.000 Do you think he wrote it?

02:23:59.000 I don't think he wrote it.

02:24:00.000 Oh, sure!

02:24:01.000 He would write that, because Trump was a part of the birther moment.

02:24:04.000 But here's the thing.

02:24:05.000 Honestly.

02:24:06.000 Legitimately.

02:24:09.000 I hope he was born in Kenya.

02:24:11.000 I hope they pulled it off.

02:24:13.000 Because I don't care.

02:24:14.000 Because my grandparents were born in Italy. 0.99

02:24:15.000 I don't give a fuck. 1.00

02:24:17.000 I don't need you to be born in this patch of dirt. 1.00

02:24:19.000 You know why? 1.00

02:24:19.000 Because I'm not a fucking idiot. 1.00

02:24:21.000 I don't think you should have to be born on a patch of dirt. 1.00

02:24:25.000 Look, should you have to be born in fucking... 1.00

02:24:30.000 Do you have to go to Calabasas in order to be the president of Nobu or whatever? 1.00

02:24:36.000 That's a bad example.

02:24:39.000 It's a restaurant, a sushi restaurant in Malibu.

02:24:41.000 Do you have to live in the town?

02:24:44.000 What are you saying?

02:24:45.000 All the patch of dirt is significant! 1.00

02:24:48.000 Where was you expelled out of the vagina? 1.00

02:24:52.000 I moved here when I was 13 minutes old. 0.99

02:24:55.000 Is that okay?

02:24:55.000 What if my mom shat me out in the middle of a plane on the way across the Pacific?

02:25:02.000 Who cares? 0.91

02:25:02.000 Am I American? 0.91

02:25:03.000 Who cares? 1.00

02:25:04.000 It's stupid. 1.00

02:25:05.000 It's dumb. 1.00

02:25:05.000 It's fucking dumb. 1.00

02:25:07.000 Well, that's like geospatial centrism. 1.00

02:25:10.000 I hope he's born in Kenya.

02:25:11.000 I hope he admits it.

02:25:12.000 I hope he says, oh, and by the way, I was born in Kenya. 1.00

02:25:15.000 Oh, shit! 1.00

02:25:16.000 If Obama wanted to... 1.00

02:25:17.000 You know how you have that...

02:25:18.000 Everybody has one friend, like, please come out.

02:25:20.000 Come out of the closet, please.

02:25:22.000 Yeah.

02:25:22.000 Please.

02:25:23.000 You'll feel better.

02:25:24.000 No one will care.

02:25:25.000 There's never been a better time.

02:25:27.000 I'm not saying Obama was born in Kenya.

02:25:29.000 I believe everything he says.

02:25:31.000 I believe he was born in Hawaii.

02:25:32.000 But part of me wishes he was actually born in Kenya.

02:25:36.000 And he waits until after the election.

02:25:38.000 And if Biden wins, he just gets in the moment.

02:25:40.000 By the way, I was born in Kenya.

02:25:42.000 Oh! 0.60

02:25:43.000 And the whole audience just goes...

02:25:45.000 The earth turns into a sun.

02:25:47.000 Everything would erupt.

02:25:49.000 Man, I gotta pee.

02:25:50.000 I gotta pee.

02:25:51.000 Go pee, bro.

02:25:51.000 Go pee.

02:25:52.000 But what are you going to do when I go pee?

02:25:53.000 Jamie has editing equipment.

02:25:55.000 Oh, right!

02:25:56.000 He's the wizard.

02:25:57.000 Don't take your headphones off.

02:25:58.000 Headphones.

02:25:58.000 Don't run away.

02:25:59.000 You're right behind the back.

02:26:01.000 That was close.

02:26:03.000 We don't have to end.

02:26:04.000 Okay, great, great.

02:26:06.000 There was one thing that I wanted to make sure when we decided to go to Spotify.

02:26:12.000 One of the first things I thought of is Duncan Trussell has to be episode number one.

02:26:17.000 That was a legitimate thing, I thought.

02:26:19.000 Because there's something about my relationship with Duncan that's very unique.

02:26:23.000 He brings things out of me.

02:26:27.000 When you're around certain friends, they put you in a state of mind that you don't go into when you're not with them.

02:26:34.000 When I'm with Joey Diaz, one of the things I love about Joey Diaz, I'm always smiling when I'm with Joey Diaz.

02:26:40.000 First of all, because he knows I love him.

02:26:42.000 I've loved him forever.

02:26:44.000 We've been friends forever.

02:26:45.000 Every time I see him, I hug him. 1.00

02:26:47.000 So because he knows I love him, when we're around, he just starts talking shit. 0.99

02:26:52.000 He gets loose because he knows that I'm his number one fan. 0.99

02:26:58.000 Another person like that is Duncan.

02:27:01.000 When I'm around Duncan, there's something we do to each other.

02:27:04.000 We're like some sort of a weird epoxy where you mix it together.

02:27:09.000 Where he puts my mind in a place that it doesn't ordinarily go to automatically.

02:27:14.000 I genuinely believe there's ideas that I form when I'm talking to Duncan.

02:27:19.000 Like ideas popping in my head when I'm talking to him that they don't get there anywhere else.

02:27:24.000 And it's...

02:27:25.000 It kind of goes in with what we're talking about about that other guy's idea of thoughts and my concept of ideas that maybe they're a life form.

02:27:34.000 Maybe they're just like E.coli that lives in your gut or the flora that's on your skin and that different people have different combinations of those things.

02:27:45.000 Just like some people, you just don't vibe with them.

02:27:48.000 You talk to them.

02:27:49.000 You just want to get away from them as quick as possible.

02:27:51.000 You're like, oh, this person's so annoying.

02:27:54.000 And you can't help it for whatever reason.

02:27:57.000 It's like they say that women, vermon-wise, like women can smell a man's clothes and they can sort of I don't know if this is true, but I read that they can accurately depict, if they smell a man's clothes, whether or not they should be attracted to that man, 0.73

02:28:14.000 whether or not they're genetically, they match up well with that man. 0.99

02:28:18.000 But that gets fucked up when they're on birth control. 1.00

02:28:21.000 Yeah, that's Sex at Dawn, right? 0.99

02:28:22.000 When they're on birth control, it gets confused, yeah.

02:28:25.000 Well, it's in Sex at Dawn, but it was a real study.

02:28:28.000 And there's a real concern about that.

02:28:31.000 That people are, you know, we're losing some of our senses. 0.99

02:28:36.000 Dude, I was in a relationship with a woman who got off birth control and stopped wanting to fuck me. 1.00

02:28:42.000 And I remember hearing that and being able to refer to the moment that she seemed to be really into me. 0.99

02:28:49.000 But then she got off birth control and suddenly her real intuition was like, You don't want to make babies with this guy. 0.99

02:28:56.000 This guy's fucked up. 1.00

02:28:57.000 And she stopped. 1.00

02:28:58.000 It was real.

02:29:00.000 I remember the moment it happened.

02:29:01.000 It was so bizarre.

02:29:02.000 It was great.

02:29:04.000 By the way, I'm glad.

02:29:06.000 Because the baby that we made is so beautiful. 1.00

02:29:09.000 Have you heard this shit about how the egg picks the sperm? 1.00

02:29:12.000 Have you heard about this? 1.00

02:29:13.000 The egg does?

02:29:14.000 This is the new research.

02:29:16.000 You know, as dudes, we're always like, well, we make the cum, and there's a sperm that makes it to the end of the race, and that's the one that makes the baby.

02:29:25.000 So in our minds, we're like, it's like a sperm that won a marathon, gets into the egg as a reward for winning the marathon.

02:29:34.000 But now the idea is the egg actually is like the sperm are running to the finish line and the egg sends out chemicals to destabilize certain sperm and picks the one that fits best with whatever the plan of the egg is.

02:29:48.000 Look at that.

02:30:07.000 Yeah.

02:30:08.000 It's the goddess, baby.

02:30:11.000 Whoa. 0.99

02:30:11.000 Dudes, it's like the last fucking bashing we had was this idea that we had this athletic little bit of our cum that made it really... 0.99

02:30:19.000 It's really the mother egg that picks it off. 1.00

02:30:20.000 It's like, come to me.

02:30:22.000 Come to me and the rest...

02:30:23.000 Come to mama.

02:30:24.000 Back! 0.88

02:30:24.000 Come to mama. 0.88

02:30:25.000 Sends out signals to destroy certain sperm that made it all that way. 0.82

02:30:30.000 Choosy eggs may pick sperm for their genes, defying Mendel's law. 0.65

02:30:35.000 We're done.

02:30:36.000 But then again, the sperm that get there... 0.81

02:30:39.000 Those are still at the front of the pack.

02:30:41.000 Yeah, like in Price is Right.

02:30:42.000 Most likely.

02:30:44.000 The egg's going to be like, look, I want the best sperm, but the best one's going to be the one that's there first anyway.

02:30:50.000 Maybe it's both things.

02:30:51.000 It's good.

02:30:52.000 It's sweet.

02:30:53.000 It's sweet.

02:30:53.000 It's kind of both things.

02:30:55.000 Yeah, but the final decision's the egg. 1.00

02:30:58.000 She doesn't want that bitch-ass lazy sperm that just bounces off the head of the rugged sperm and like winds up plop. 1.00

02:31:04.000 Wow, can't believe you chose me. 1.00

02:31:05.000 It's like, I didn't. 1.00

02:31:07.000 Shit, now I have a nerd. 1.00

02:31:09.000 And the... 0.99

02:31:10.000 The egg gets really pissed because it's not a precise mechanism.

02:31:13.000 There's a lot of chaos going on to encourage, you know, entropy and to encourage innovation.

02:31:18.000 They figure out how to better, the better version of the species to get into the egg.

02:31:23.000 Sometimes there's a headbutt and then the dum-dum goes right in head first and bang! 0.95

02:31:28.000 You got a kid that's not that bright.

02:31:30.000 I want that kid, but then that being said... 0.63

02:31:32.000 Those kids are supposed to get eaten by coyotes. 0.99

02:31:34.000 On one level, it's great because it says actually the goddess chooses everything, but then on another level, You've got Hitler. 0.79

02:31:42.000 Exactly.

02:31:43.000 So that Hitler's mom's egg had a bunch of other sperm that were like, we're not doing a genocide! 0.95

02:31:50.000 And what's the connection with what we talked about before with Hitler?

02:31:54.000 Amphetamines.

02:31:55.000 Yeah.

02:31:56.000 Hitler was all about... 0.96

02:31:59.000 They would inject coke in him and testosterone in him.

02:32:03.000 There's a legendary story about how Mussolini wanted to talk to Hitler about pulling out of the war.

02:32:07.000 And Hitler showed up... 0.90

02:32:09.000 Shot up with cocaine and testosterone and just Yeah, I don't even Mussolini know what the fuck he was saying, but he sweated on him until Mussolini relented Dude, McKenna used to talk about alcohol in this way like like we survived alcohol Well, 0.96

02:32:28.000 he talked about alcohol being the differentiation between the ancient psychedelic cultures that worshiped the cattle, which shat on the ground, the mushrooms grew from, and they had all this mushroom iconography, to when they started preserving things, 0.95

02:32:45.000 and preserving things in honey, which meant fermented honey, which meant mead, which meant alcohol, and then they switched to an alcohol-based society when they couldn't grow the mushrooms anymore because of climate change, or because they were moving, and moving in different directions.

02:32:58.000 This is what I think happened.

02:32:59.000 This is where I disagree with McKenna.

02:33:01.000 First of all, how confident are you?

02:33:04.000 Not that confident.

02:33:05.000 The fact that you say, I disagree with McKenna.

02:33:06.000 I was about to apologize to Dennis McKenna and say, I acknowledge I'm a complete dope.

02:33:11.000 Well, he disagrees with his brother sometimes. 0.99

02:33:13.000 Yeah, but he disagrees in the way an ethnobotanist disagrees with a scientist, not in the way some fucking guy. 0.96

02:33:18.000 Somebody literally goes and night goes to Reddit Conspiracy. 0.94

02:33:23.000 Who's literally on a show called Joe Rogan Questions Everything.

02:33:26.000 We investigated UFO materials.

02:33:30.000 I'm sure, like, Stephen Hawking disagreed with Albert Einstein.

02:33:33.000 Bro, you went into a bunker to talk to a dude who's gonna start a cult.

02:33:37.000 And you're like, hey, you guys grow tomatoes?

02:33:39.000 No!

02:33:41.000 No!

02:33:41.000 Like, I'm...

02:33:43.000 I remember coming back, I'm like, what was that guy like?

02:33:48.000 He was a really nice guy! 0.99

02:33:51.000 I'm like, we'll get a nice guy, digs a hole in the side of a fucking mountain and parks his SUV. This guy's crazy. 1.00

02:33:58.000 Bro. 1.00

02:33:59.000 It's so stupid to say. 1.00

02:34:00.000 I disagree with one of the great minds that I acknowledge that. 0.99

02:34:06.000 But, you know, to me, this is what I picture happening.

02:34:11.000 So, okay, we're storing our mushrooms in jars of alcohol, right?

02:34:15.000 We're storing our mushrooms in jars of alcohol. 0.98

02:34:17.000 And the rich people, the elites, eat the mushrooms, they all trip out in their little orgi-astic fucking awesome thing. 0.94

02:34:24.000 And then who's left? 0.77

02:34:26.000 The people whose job it is to put the mushrooms in the alcohol.

02:34:29.000 And what's left?

02:34:30.000 These jars.

02:34:31.000 They have a little bit of booze in them and some mushroom residue.

02:34:35.000 They drink it.

02:34:36.000 And then they start... 1.00

02:34:37.000 That would be the beginning of getting fucked up on alcohol. 0.98

02:34:41.000 I guess what I'm saying is... 0.94

02:34:44.000 I imagine that really, if you look at mushrooms or LSD or any psychedelic, it teaches you you're a we, not an I. You're a we, not a me.

02:34:54.000 And booze, what does it teach you?

02:34:57.000 You're a me.

02:34:57.000 When you're all pissed off on booze, 100% of the time, you're not angry because you're worried about the conditions of the world.

02:35:07.000 You're usually angry because someone...

02:35:08.000 What's funnier than when you insult an alcoholic?

02:35:11.000 How many times have you been around like a... 0.69

02:35:13.000 Have you ever heard of alcoholics' feelings where you say to them, hey, you're an alcoholic, and you see that look in their face where they recognize that you're telling the truth, that it really hurts, and they get mad at you?

02:35:25.000 Yeah.

02:35:27.000 Dude, alcoholic outrage is one of the most desperately sad things to witness.

02:35:33.000 There's nothing worse than a drunk whose feelings are hurt.

02:35:36.000 Because usually their feelings are hurt because...

02:35:38.000 Because you told the truth, too.

02:35:40.000 Yeah, they don't want the truth.

02:35:42.000 Because their condition depends on lies.

02:35:45.000 Well, it's a weird...

02:35:47.000 One of the things about alcohol is it sort of narrows reality.

02:35:53.000 If you think of one of the things that I really, really enjoy about edibles, there's a thing that I enjoy where I get so paranoid and so freaked out that I don't think I'm going to make it.

02:36:04.000 And then I come down from that.

02:36:06.000 And I get to this place of humility.

02:36:07.000 And that's one of my favorite places to be as a person.

02:36:11.000 When I'm coming down from a horrendous edible high, and then all of a sudden I'm real thankful that it's over.

02:36:18.000 I just want to be friends with people.

02:36:20.000 There's that space.

02:36:24.000 The world broadens.

02:36:27.000 Your danger broadens.

02:36:29.000 Your humility, your humanity, your vulnerability broadens.

02:36:35.000 And then it comes back to a manageable level, and you recognize that it could be so far worse than what you're experiencing currently. 0.60

02:36:41.000 And it's just your perspective that's fucking things up.

02:36:43.000 Because right now, with you and me right here, no people have ever been more comfortable in the history of humanity. 0.97

02:36:48.000 No!

02:36:49.000 We're both in love.

02:36:50.000 We both have children.

02:36:51.000 We're both drunk and high.

02:36:53.000 We both love each other.

02:36:54.000 We're both making each other laugh.

02:36:57.000 Anybody in this position that looks at things incorrectly.

02:37:00.000 But like...

02:37:01.000 Our problem is always perspective.

02:37:03.000 Our problem is always not recognizing how good we have it when we have it.

02:37:09.000 That's right.

02:37:10.000 Dude, this is like, there's a Buddhist teacher, Jack Corfield, who says, tend to the part of the garden you can touch.

02:37:16.000 And also Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, in one of his books, one of the things he said was, look, it could, and he meant it, it could be there's an ism That's good.

02:37:27.000 There's an ism that's the right way to be. 0.99

02:37:29.000 Like, it could be socialism, communism, who knows?

02:37:31.000 He didn't say that, but there could be an ism that works.

02:37:35.000 Right, because we can't accept the fact that the isms of the past are the only ones that are ever going to be available.

02:37:41.000 That's crazy.

02:37:42.000 There might be a utopian ideal that is applicable to the now.

02:37:46.000 Or just better.

02:37:47.000 But what I love about what he said is, it doesn't matter if you can't find peace in your own home.

02:37:56.000 Yes.

02:37:57.000 If when you're in your own home, there's disharmony.

02:38:00.000 If you're in your own home, people are unhappy.

02:38:03.000 In your own home, people are freaked out.

02:38:06.000 Then why would you even think about socialism, capitalism, or communism when the pixel of society is the house, the householder?

02:38:16.000 And if within that pixel there's division, then of course in the world that division would be made into some monstrous thing.

02:38:25.000 Even down to the core, to the singular you as a human.

02:38:30.000 Are you okay?

02:38:32.000 Yes. 1.00

02:38:32.000 Do you have your shit together or no? 1.00

02:38:34.000 Sometimes yes, sometimes no. 1.00

02:38:36.000 Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

02:38:37.000 And everybody wants to point at people who don't.

02:38:39.000 Going, look at you. 1.00

02:38:41.000 You don't have your shit together, Duncan. 1.00

02:38:44.000 I know, I know. 1.00

02:38:45.000 You got three quarters of your shit together. 1.00

02:38:48.000 That's not helping me get my shit together. 1.00

02:38:50.000 That with your white privilege. 0.99

02:38:52.000 But I'm trying to be better. 0.99

02:38:54.000 I believe you, but you must be punished.

02:38:57.000 I'm not sure for how long.

02:38:58.000 Well, that's aggression.

02:39:00.000 Silence.

02:39:00.000 I want silence from you for an extended period of time.

02:39:03.000 I'll give it to you.

02:39:04.000 On the side! 0.82

02:39:05.000 I'll give it to you.

02:39:06.000 The further the silence, the more you're going to appease people.

02:39:09.000 You could wait ten years and no one, like four people would be upset. 0.95

02:39:12.000 Look man, like to me like it's like the whole that that whole ball of wax man is like Dude like after once I started like the thing is like when all this shit happened And as a comedian, I was really afraid to get into even a little bit of studying the shit people are upset about. 0.98

02:39:31.000 Because no comedian in their right mind wants to be identified with some woke-ass comedian. 0.97

02:39:38.000 Because it's embarrassing. 1.00

02:39:39.000 But then when I started looking into it, then I found out about the George Washington shit. 1.00

02:39:44.000 The George Washington shit is super creepy. 1.00

02:39:46.000 Creepy! 1.00

02:39:47.000 Because there's no way, if those teeth were valuable, that people weren't murdered for their teeth.

02:39:51.000 That's it.

02:39:52.000 There's no way people weren't like just held down and they got their teeth stolen or they were told that they were gonna get money and they weren't.

02:40:00.000 And many of them had been raped.

02:40:02.000 But here's the thing. 0.99

02:40:03.000 Is there real value in getting outraged at shit that happened hundreds of years ago or is it an acknowledgement of First of all, the fact that we all agree we can do better. 0.97

02:40:16.000 The turmoil exists, all of it, social, economic. 0.97

02:40:20.000 The turmoil exists because we haven't really come to grips with whether or not we can all get together and be cool with each other all the time.

02:40:29.000 So there's always some sort of turmoil. 0.98

02:40:32.000 And when you look at turmoil in terms of whether it's financial turmoil or social turmoil, We're always trying to figure out, like, who's being the asshole? 0.99

02:40:43.000 Right? 0.99

02:40:44.000 Don't you feel like that?

02:40:47.000 What do you mean? 1.00

02:40:48.000 When you see anything that's happening, like when you see a government getting overthrown, when you see war, you're always like, who is being the asshole? 0.99

02:41:00.000 Any kind of turmoil. 0.99

02:41:01.000 You mean you try to find the perpetrator of the...

02:41:05.000 Difficulty.

02:41:05.000 Right, what's causing it?

02:41:07.000 And is it possible that most of this shit could be avoided? 0.99

02:41:10.000 And what's stopping most of it from being avoided? 0.99

02:41:13.000 When you look at any kind of, anytime a government, like any kind of country invades, anytime a country invades another country, anytime bombs are being dropped from drones, like, what can be done to avoid this?

02:41:24.000 That's right.

02:41:25.000 What can be done? 0.98

02:41:26.000 Dude, man, I started this fucking pandemic philosophy club, is what we call it, with my friends Marcus and Brandon. 0.98

02:41:33.000 What's up? 0.99

02:41:34.000 We don't even do a podcast.

02:41:36.000 Every Friday, we just get together and talk.

02:41:38.000 And they like Midnight Gospel.

02:41:40.000 That's how I got lucky enough to meet them.

02:41:42.000 Midnight Gospel is an amazing show, dude.

02:41:44.000 Thank you, brother.

02:41:44.000 Can I just say before we get going, I'm really proud of you.

02:41:47.000 Thank you, brother.

02:41:48.000 Really proud of you because it represents you as an artist more than anything any of my friends who've ever done has done.

02:41:55.000 Because you're so weird.

02:41:57.000 And it's so weird, but it's so funny and it's so amazing.

02:41:59.000 I can't believe it was.

02:42:00.000 It's amazing.

02:42:02.000 They let us make it.

02:42:03.000 I can't believe they let us make it.

02:42:04.000 Praise Odin for Netflix.

02:42:06.000 Praise Odin.

02:42:07.000 What they've done is amazing, but what you've done is somehow or another encapsulate some of the things I love about you, how weird you are.

02:42:16.000 You're not like anybody else.

02:42:18.000 When you came here today, one of the things I said to you, I go, dude, you're the only guy that I like listening to your ads.

02:42:26.000 That's sweet, Joe.

02:42:27.000 I do.

02:42:28.000 Thanks, man. 0.99

02:42:29.000 Your fucking ExpressVPN ad is a hilarious ad. 0.99

02:42:32.000 It took so long, I didn't even know if it was an ad. 1.00

02:42:35.000 Thank you, Zipzi.

02:42:36.000 It was just so crazy.

02:42:37.000 But you're the best.

02:42:38.000 Well, I'm one of the ones who was former.

02:42:40.000 You are the best that I've ever seen at reading ads.

02:42:43.000 Out of all the people that I've ever heard who read ads, Your ads are the most entertaining.

02:42:49.000 You're very sweet, Joe. 0.98

02:42:49.000 And I'm not going to get in a cock-sucking competition with you, but I wouldn't be here if not for you. 0.98

02:42:53.000 And that's the truth, and I'll never stop saying it. 0.98

02:42:56.000 And I will never stop being grateful to you.

02:42:58.000 But I wouldn't be me if it wasn't for my friendship with you either.

02:43:00.000 That's very sweet, man.

02:43:01.000 It's true.

02:43:01.000 I appreciate that.

02:43:02.000 We all benefit each other.

02:43:04.000 Yeah, but I don't mean to cut you off.

02:43:05.000 I'm so sorry.

02:43:06.000 By the way, I had a little bit of booze, so forgive my impetuousness that I would suddenly interrupt you, but you do have a history of finding young comedians who are like, and you do help us a lot, and we are eternally grateful to you.

02:43:21.000 And I don't care if you don't acknowledge it.

02:43:22.000 You won't acknowledge it, because if you did, you're afraid you'll go crazy.

02:43:26.000 I'll tell you from my perspective, it's not that I'll go crazy.

02:43:28.000 It's that I have to do it.

02:43:30.000 There's no if, ands, or buts.

02:43:32.000 It's a path. 0.97

02:43:33.000 It's like if you're going down, if you're on a fucking one of those water slides and you're going flying down, you're just going that way.

02:43:42.000 If you're a good person and you love comedy and you love comedians and you have friends and you want to see them happy and you want to see them successful. 0.93

02:43:51.000 And you know they're good.

02:43:52.000 And you know it benefits not just them, but you to elevate them.

02:43:56.000 I'm like, hey, check out Annie Letterman.

02:43:59.000 Hey, check out everybody, whoever it is.

02:44:02.000 It's like, I want them to know that my relationship with them, anybody who's listening to this podcast or anybody who listens to my stand-up or watches it, it's genuine.

02:44:11.000 That's who I am.

02:44:12.000 So if I find someone who's awesome, I want you to know about it.

02:44:15.000 I don't want to get paid for it.

02:44:17.000 If I find a great band, I start talking about it on Instagram.

02:44:20.000 I find a great application.

02:44:22.000 I tell people.

02:44:23.000 It's cool.

02:44:24.000 I have the obligation.

02:44:26.000 I didn't know if I did or I didn't.

02:44:28.000 But I don't think I'm in a position that everybody's in.

02:44:32.000 It's a weird spot.

02:44:33.000 And might I say, I'm so glad that Annie Letterman is someone that your attention is following.

02:44:38.000 I love her.

02:44:38.000 She is so funny.

02:44:39.000 She's so funny. 0.97

02:44:39.000 Her podcast is so fucking funny. 0.97

02:44:41.000 I'm sure it is, but dude, her and Whitney, this is what happened. 0.81

02:44:45.000 We were at the comic store the other night, Mike Binder.

02:44:48.000 Mike Beiner is doing his whole Showtime documentary thing, so we're all on the roof.

02:44:55.000 It was fun, man.

02:44:56.000 I got to chat with Paul Rodriguez.

02:44:59.000 Very cool dude.

02:45:00.000 I really never got a lot of time talking to Paul Rodriguez before.

02:45:04.000 He's a really cool man.

02:45:06.000 He's really cool.

02:45:06.000 He had some good...

02:45:09.000 Good stories about South America and Latin America and Mexico, where comedians who actually got jailed. 0.99

02:45:16.000 Really interesting shit. 0.94

02:45:18.000 And Bill Burr was hilarious, and Annie Letterman was on fire, and then there was Whitney Cummings and Jay Leno. 0.99

02:45:23.000 And we had a good fucking time, man. 0.98

02:45:24.000 And Mike Binder. 1.00

02:45:26.000 It was a really good fucking time. 0.99

02:45:27.000 It really was. 0.99

02:45:30.000 First of all, it reminded me how much I loved that place. 0.99

02:45:36.000 I walked in there, I was like, God damn. 0.98

02:45:40.000 I got so emotional when I walked through the door. 0.99

02:45:43.000 But when I had Whitney and Annie together and they're talking shit to each other, I'm like, these girls are so funny. 0.98

02:45:49.000 Yeah, man. 0.98

02:45:49.000 And they love each other. 0.98

02:45:50.000 They're really good friends.

02:45:52.000 And I said, Whitney was scheduled to be on the podcast.

02:45:55.000 And then I said to her, I said, do you care if Annie comes?

02:45:57.000 I want Annie to come, but it's up to you. 1.00

02:45:59.000 She's like, fuck yeah. 0.99

02:46:00.000 So I brought Annie in too. 1.00

02:46:02.000 And the two of them together, dude, they're savages.

02:46:03.000 That's the future of female comedy. 1.00

02:46:06.000 Truly.

02:46:06.000 And the future of podcasting.

02:46:08.000 Because there's all these, like, that's a popular thing now.

02:46:11.000 Like, Guys We Fucked, they're killing it. 0.86

02:46:14.000 And then there's Call Her Daddy, that show's killing it. 0.97

02:46:16.000 Like, they're on a different vibration than you, Duncan Trussell.

02:46:20.000 But there's a really popular sort of segment.

02:46:22.000 Yeah. 0.96

02:46:23.000 And these two girls together, two hilarious stand-up comics, talking shit together on a podcast. 1.00

02:46:28.000 I'm like, you guys have to do it. 0.99

02:46:30.000 But they're also, like, you gotta admit, like, they're gonzo.

02:46:34.000 Like, the Hunter S. Thompson thing.

02:46:36.000 They're full gonzo.

02:46:37.000 Both of them are, like, terrifying in their own way. 0.79

02:46:40.000 Yes.

02:46:40.000 Like, you know what I mean?

02:46:41.000 Like, when you encounter either of them.

02:46:43.000 I have to help them, right?

02:46:45.000 You have to help them.

02:46:46.000 I have to help them do a podcast.

02:46:47.000 And it has to be Annie and Whitney, because the A's make you find it quicker. 1.00

02:46:52.000 The world deserves it, but like I remember going to do any when I want to be Annie and Whitney when I went to do Annie Letterman's podcast I won't give anything away any what happened I'm not I can't say it.

02:47:03.000 It's not legal, but like I remember like Leaving there being like Wow Like I remember leaving there just thinking like whole not just that not whatever I'm saying right now I'm saying like realizing like I've always loved chatting with Annie Letterman.

02:47:21.000 We have great conversations, but I remember like getting into where she lived and looking around and Realizing like well, she's formed some kind of cult.

02:47:31.000 I don't know what it is.

02:47:32.000 She's really funny, man She's so funny and like that like just that moment of like wow like you're you're like Both of them.

02:47:43.000 Well, the thing is, is like this acknowledgement, first of all, your podcast has a cult following, and you've hit this weird place.

02:47:54.000 And I think you feel very similar to the way I do, that when you find someone who's extraordinary, you want to let everybody else know.

02:48:02.000 Yeah, exactly.

02:48:03.000 We both have that.

02:48:04.000 All of us have that.

02:48:05.000 Joey has that.

02:48:06.000 Ari has that. 0.99

02:48:07.000 If you're Ari's friend and you have a special coming out, Ari will promote the fuck out of you. 1.00

02:48:13.000 He's amazing at that. 0.88

02:48:14.000 He did it for Joe List.

02:48:15.000 He's done it for Mark Normand.

02:48:17.000 He's helped get guys on my podcast and I blow them up because if you're friends with Ari, you're friends with me.

02:48:23.000 But we're all like that.

02:48:24.000 Diaz, Redman's like that.

02:48:26.000 Tony Hinchcliffe's like that.

02:48:27.000 Everybody will tell you all the people around them that are killing it.

02:48:31.000 And I think that's real important, man.

02:48:33.000 I think it's an important thing to get out there.

02:48:35.000 There's a frequency that we're all sending out, and it's a frequency of camaraderie.

02:48:42.000 It doesn't matter if you're wrong sometimes. 0.99

02:48:45.000 Sometimes you fuck up. 0.99

02:48:47.000 We're all trying to go the right direction. 1.00

02:48:51.000 When we're talking about that dumb sperm that clashes heads with the alpha sperm and just accidentally slides in, That shit is gonna happen. 1.00

02:48:59.000 That's right. 1.00

02:49:00.000 But we have to move forward in the spirit of camaraderie.

02:49:05.000 And this is like the big test.

02:49:06.000 Can we for a second just draw?

02:49:09.000 I don't care.

02:49:09.000 It's so cheesy.

02:49:11.000 Everyone's heard you talk about the Comedy Store.

02:49:13.000 Let's just spend a second with the Comedy Store, man.

02:49:16.000 Because for me, and this is the truth, and I was talking to Ari, he's like...

02:49:21.000 You never went.

02:49:21.000 I'm like, I was going up like twice a week, but even if I wasn't.

02:49:24.000 He said you never went?

02:49:25.000 No, for a second.

02:49:26.000 You worked there, dude.

02:49:28.000 That's how we became friends.

02:49:29.000 I know, but Ari saw me in a really dark period where I was like not showing up for spots and he rightfully judges me for that.

02:49:36.000 But like, it's okay.

02:49:38.000 Was that when you were living with me?

02:49:40.000 That was after I was living with you.

02:49:42.000 I went through a dark period.

02:49:43.000 I took it for granted, and I deserve his...

02:49:46.000 No, no, no.

02:49:47.000 But, Duncan, you've just always been complicated.

02:49:52.000 You're complicated.

02:49:53.000 I was having a conversation with someone, and they were saying, it's okay to have a loose chassis, but you've got to stay on the road.

02:50:00.000 I try to stay on the road, man.

02:50:03.000 But I love the Comedy Store.

02:50:04.000 I love it with all my heart.

02:50:06.000 Dude, when you and I became friends, we should tell people, you and I became friends because I would call into the Comedy Store and I'd say, hey, I'm here Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.

02:50:15.000 And you'd be like, cool, man. 0.95

02:50:16.000 Hey, did you fucking see this thing? 0.87

02:50:18.000 That they're saying is happening in Nepal where all these people are getting together and they're all seeing these... 0.97

02:50:23.000 We'd have these crazy conversations that go on for hours. 0.98

02:50:26.000 You'd put me on hold, you'd take another call, and then we would talk about fucking Terrence McKenna and Graham Hancock. 0.99

02:50:34.000 The best. 0.97

02:50:34.000 Dude, we would get baked on the phone where Duncan Trussell was a Comedy Store employee, and I was at home... 0.97

02:50:41.000 And we would get high, and we would just start talking about aliens and ghosts.

02:50:45.000 It was the best, Joe.

02:50:46.000 It was the best, man.

02:50:47.000 That place is a temple, for real.

02:50:49.000 Dude, but you and I became phone pals.

02:50:53.000 That's how we got to be friends, and here we are right now.

02:50:56.000 The funny thing is the conversation we're having is no different than the conversation we had when I was working there.

02:51:02.000 I was saying to Jamie when you left and went to pee, people bring things out of people.

02:51:07.000 And it's something that I don't think people like to admit.

02:51:10.000 But sometimes people bring bad things out of people, and sometimes people bring good things out of people.

02:51:15.000 And when I'm with you, I'm different than when I'm not with you.

02:51:18.000 Yeah, man.

02:51:19.000 I really don't want this conversation to end.

02:51:22.000 I'm not going to get all sappy and cinnamon.

02:51:24.000 Will you fly to Austin occasionally?

02:51:25.000 Anytime you want, man.

02:51:26.000 I'll come anytime you want.

02:51:28.000 To me, it's like...

02:51:30.000 This is my solution to all this.

02:51:32.000 I'm just going to fly people out and put them up and pay for their food.

02:51:35.000 It'll be great!

02:51:35.000 Get them massages.

02:51:36.000 It'll be great, man.

02:51:37.000 But all that being said, we just...

02:51:42.000 I just don't, I don't think anyone can understand what it's like unless they've been there to get off stage at the Comedy Store.

02:51:50.000 And you have a good set maybe, but you're working on a joke and you get off stage and suddenly Whitney Cummings, who's like a very rightfully successful, brilliantly funny person, stops you and says, hey, what do you think about this addition to your punchline?

02:52:06.000 You know what I mean?

02:52:07.000 Like those moments are so so like so like cuz cuz in that moment there isn't like a Hierarchy like in that moment.

02:52:15.000 There isn't like look I made like a shows for network TV to one of my proudest moments as a comic I was at the improv and this was like 2003 or some shit like that and Louie CK sits in the back of the room and takes notes and And then we get off stage,

02:52:34.000 and he actually asked me before, he goes, do you mind if I watch and give you some notes? 0.76

02:52:39.000 I go, dude, I'd fucking love that.

02:52:41.000 And then afterwards, he had a bunch of really funny suggestions.

02:52:45.000 I don't remember if I'd wind up using any of them, but it was just so fun, so fun to hear him and I talk about bits, and the fact that he would sit down and watch these bits.

02:52:55.000 That's it.

02:52:56.000 So to me, like...

02:53:00.000 I would always tell Aaron, my wife, I would always say, There's no comedy store anywhere else.

02:53:07.000 I want to be here.

02:53:09.000 I don't think it's impossible to make that somewhere else.

02:53:12.000 This is the whole reason why I'm interested in moving to Texas.

02:53:16.000 I don't believe that we have to be tethered to this machine that makes things that we don't do.

02:53:21.000 This machine makes music, this machine makes movies, and it makes TV shows.

02:53:25.000 And we don't do any of those things.

02:53:27.000 We're in a totally different business.

02:53:28.000 And I don't think we have to be connected to any sort of legacy entertainment structure.

02:53:33.000 It doesn't make any sense.

02:53:35.000 They're just trying to siphon money off of you.

02:53:38.000 They're missing the point.

02:53:41.000 I want to tell the truth.

02:53:43.000 I don't want to just sell things.

02:53:45.000 I want to say what I'm thinking right now, whether it's good or bad or angry or sad or remorseful.

02:53:53.000 I want to be able to say it anytime I want to say it.

02:53:55.000 And this is not acceptable.

02:53:58.000 In the regular old school legacy medium that people are thinking of as mainstream media.

02:54:07.000 And it was mainstream media like 20 years ago or 30 years ago. 0.98

02:54:10.000 But what you and I are doing right now is riding on a fucking cave wall compared to what's coming. 0.99

02:54:16.000 What you and I are doing right now compared to what the fuck is gonna happen when Elon Musk starts producing this whole neural link. 0.99

02:54:24.000 Yeah. 0.98

02:54:24.000 Yeah, and then they develop some sort of fucking satellite network where everyone's connected and reading each other's minds all over the globe. 0.98

02:54:33.000 Dude, this is cave wall scratch tickets bullshit. 0.99

02:54:39.000 We're playing Tick Tock Toe by the fire. 0.99

02:54:41.000 But this is to me the poignant thing about Neolithic structures.

02:54:48.000 You see the Neolithic structure? 1.00

02:54:51.000 And you know, like, fuck, man. 0.99

02:54:54.000 People spent a long time building that. 1.00

02:54:56.000 And in the process of building that, they became friends and they shared stories.

02:55:00.000 And it was really beautiful. 0.98

02:55:01.000 But now all we see is some old, eroded shit that we don't know anything about, right? 0.99

02:55:08.000 Yeah. 0.98

02:55:09.000 So, to me, what's beautiful is, like, you are absolutely right.

02:55:11.000 This thing we're doing right now, it doesn't matter.

02:55:16.000 What we're doing is, like, Morse code.

02:55:18.000 It's gonna be gone.

02:55:19.000 It doesn't matter if it's a million years, but it won't be a billion years.

02:55:22.000 It won't be that long before our conversations seem dated.

02:55:25.000 But you know what we're doing also?

02:55:27.000 We're doing the same thing that Beethoven was doing, where they were making music at a time where you couldn't record it, so you had to write it down.

02:55:34.000 We're doing some clunky version.

02:55:36.000 Imagine if you could listen to the actual orchestra that was playing Beethoven's Fifth Symphony. 1.00

02:55:44.000 Oh shit, that's crazy! 1.00

02:55:45.000 Can you imagine? 0.99

02:55:47.000 Also being in context of never having heard The Doors, never having heard Hendrix, never having heard any of that, only being in that era and sitting in the audience.

02:56:03.000 Da-da [...]-da!

02:56:05.000 Da-da [...]- Jamie, act like...

02:56:14.000 No, no, I don't...

02:56:15.000 It was a terrible impression.

02:56:16.000 It was like, who am I? But think about how powerful that is.

02:56:20.000 But imagine being there in the moment when it was first released.

02:56:23.000 Yeah.

02:56:23.000 And no one could record anything.

02:56:25.000 And now it's echoing.

02:56:26.000 You had to write it down in some weird...

02:56:29.000 They had to develop a language for music.

02:56:31.000 To say what it was, yeah.

02:56:32.000 I mean, you could be a badass guitarist in 2020 and not have any idea how to read music.

02:56:39.000 Yeah, that's right.

02:56:40.000 Right?

02:56:40.000 That's right.

02:56:41.000 You could, like, watch videos and just decide, I'm just gonna go full Stevie Ray Vaughan.

02:56:47.000 Some people don't want to know how to read it.

02:56:49.000 Yeah, they want to be able to just free...

02:56:52.000 Oh, what's the earliest recording of that?

02:56:54.000 Is this hooked on?

02:56:55.000 Can you play that?

02:56:56.000 Or will we get in trouble?

02:56:57.000 Let's see what happens.

02:56:58.000 You can't play it.

02:56:59.000 Da-da-da-da-da-da! 0.60

02:57:01.000 That is it.

02:57:02.000 That's it, right?

02:57:03.000 That's Beethoven's fifth?

02:57:04.000 I mean, bro. 0.99

02:57:05.000 Imagine being alive back then when you never heard any shit like that. 0.99

02:57:08.000 Dude, I was sitting in the audience. 0.98

02:57:10.000 Do you remember when Notorious Big I. G. B.I.G. Big I. G. [...

02:57:34.000 what year?

02:57:34.000 97. 97?

02:57:36.000 Yeah.

02:57:36.000 So, okay.

02:57:37.000 I was on news radio from 94 to 99. So, I was on news radio, and I remember driving to work and hearing that going, whoa, they just cracked through some new level.

02:57:46.000 Yeah.

02:57:46.000 Biggie, biggie, biggie, can't you see?

02:57:49.000 Sometimes your words, they hypnotize me.

02:57:51.000 Great song.

02:57:52.000 Oh, my God.

02:57:53.000 But it was just, there was something about it where I was like, oh, somebody figured out a new level of the video game.

02:58:00.000 Yeah.

02:58:02.000 Of course you did.

02:58:03.000 Dude, you don't understand what it was like back then.

02:58:06.000 No internet.

02:58:07.000 You would see him on MTV with piles of cash.

02:58:12.000 There was no accountability.

02:58:14.000 That's so cool.

02:58:17.000 There's a concept in Buddhism, which is if you want to really...

02:58:21.000 This song hasn't even started yet.

02:58:22.000 That's so many! 0.99

02:58:24.000 That's just helicopters and shit. 0.99

02:58:26.000 How many helicopters do you need? 0.99

02:58:27.000 Look at him.

02:58:28.000 Look at him, Biggie. 0.98

02:58:29.000 Man, do you know how many fucking amazing songs we missed out on? 0.98

02:58:33.000 Because Biggie and Tupac didn't get together and smoke pot. 0.99

02:58:37.000 I know. 0.99

02:58:37.000 How fucked up is that? 0.99

02:58:37.000 Just have a couple of drinks. 0.99

02:58:38.000 Like, somebody had them tricked that they were enemies.

02:58:41.000 Imagine if Biggie and Tupac were just like me and Stan Hope, or like comics.

02:58:46.000 Yeah. 0.98

02:58:46.000 Like comics who just like, like, what the fuck are we, we should love each other. 0.98

02:58:50.000 We're the only ones that are like, how many goddamn MCs are there? 0.99

02:58:54.000 How many rappers are there? 0.99

02:58:55.000 How many stand-ups are there?

02:58:56.000 There's so few.

02:58:57.000 There you go.

02:58:57.000 We should be so happy.

02:58:58.000 We can't... 1.00

02:59:00.000 That kind of talk will get you killed. 0.95

02:59:03.000 Because that's the last bastion of the thing that wants to keep us limited, man. 0.89

02:59:09.000 That's the idea.

02:59:10.000 Even them, man.

02:59:11.000 I'm telling you.

02:59:12.000 For them, they need to listen up.

02:59:14.000 I know you want to have control.

02:59:16.000 But sometimes not having control is better.

02:59:19.000 Here's the thing in archery.

02:59:21.000 Let me tell you something about archery.

02:59:23.000 There's a thing about archery where it's very few people can what they call command shoot.

02:59:30.000 What that means is when you draw back the bow and you have your finger on the trigger, you just decide when the arrow is going to go.

02:59:37.000 Okay, sure.

02:59:38.000 Most people don't do it that way.

02:59:40.000 And most people who do these big tournaments, like even the Olympics, they teach them to have a surprise release.

02:59:47.000 It's a psychological trick, where you're using a certain type of release, where either you have your finger on a trigger and you don't push your finger, you just let your back muscles pull it because they're crude muscles, or you use what's called a hinge, where you slowly pull on the hinge, and the arrow goes, but you don't know when it's gonna go.

03:00:03.000 Whereas a trigger, you know exactly where it's gonna go.

03:00:06.000 Where there's something about knowing exactly where it's gonna go, where you just fucking, you tense up, you twitch. 0.92

03:00:12.000 And it's hard. 0.87

03:00:13.000 It's hard to keep your mind in order where you just go, especially if you're shooting in a tournament, you're in the Olympics, gold medal round, ha!

03:00:20.000 So very few people in the Olympics allow their brain to decide when the shot goes.

03:00:26.000 Isn't that interesting?

03:00:27.000 Yeah.

03:00:28.000 Yeah, that's beautiful.

03:00:29.000 I get what you're saying, too.

03:00:31.000 There's the mind of no mind, the ability to get out of your own way.

03:00:35.000 And for archers, the best way to do this is either in the hinge release or a release with a thumb where you pull through with your back muscles and it makes the thumb trigger go up.

03:00:44.000 So cool.

03:00:45.000 This thing is dangerous.

03:00:46.000 This thing's dangerous because you can develop what's called target panic.

03:00:50.000 And there's people that never, like my friend Cam Haynes, he's a freak of nature.

03:00:53.000 He's never developed target panic.

03:00:55.000 And he shoots like this.

03:00:56.000 He sees things, he shoots at them, and he's perfect. 1.00

03:00:58.000 He shoots 140 yards, boop, pop balloons and shit. 1.00

03:01:01.000 But he also runs a marathon a day. 1.00

03:01:03.000 He's like a freak of nature.

03:01:04.000 He's a very rare human.

03:01:05.000 But you can't bank it on those people.

03:01:07.000 You got to think about the rest of the folks.

03:01:09.000 For the rest of the folks, the whole idea is like getting rid of anxiety.

03:01:14.000 And what's anxiety?

03:01:15.000 Anxiety is pulling a trigger.

03:01:16.000 If you're in a gold medal round, I just hit that bullseye.

03:01:19.000 This is it.

03:01:20.000 America wins. 0.72

03:01:21.000 And you just flinch.

03:01:23.000 There's just a little thing that happens to you that you don't want to happen.

03:01:28.000 And your arrow just goes four inches shy of the mark.

03:01:31.000 Got it.

03:01:31.000 Fuck.

03:01:32.000 Love it. 1.00

03:01:33.000 Yeah, that's the, so that is the, so like, and I'm sorry, every podcast I do, I talk about Buddhism, but I don't care.

03:01:40.000 I want you to talk about Buddhism.

03:01:42.000 Okay, thank you.

03:01:42.000 So like, what I love about it is like, so everybody gets caught up In the first two ideas in Buddhism.

03:01:51.000 The first being, life is unsatisfactory.

03:01:54.000 The second being, the reason life is unsatisfactory is because you think it's a way that it's not.

03:01:59.000 Now this gets translated in a lot of...

03:02:00.000 Let's break that down.

03:02:01.000 Life is unsatisfactory, and the reason you think life is unsatisfactory is because...

03:02:07.000 Well, life...

03:02:08.000 So the best way to put it would be, have you ever been with someone in traffic in L.A.? And they're angry.

03:02:15.000 Me!

03:02:16.000 Okay.

03:02:17.000 Me!

03:02:17.000 By myself!

03:02:19.000 Right.

03:02:20.000 But that's literally the way traffic is in LA. Yes.

03:02:24.000 Yet somehow, like, because you drove that day into traffic, you got into your head, this would be the one day in LA where there wouldn't be traffic.

03:02:33.000 No.

03:02:34.000 Honestly, I keep it together.

03:02:35.000 But I do.

03:02:36.000 I do.

03:02:37.000 I recognize that it's knocking on the door.

03:02:39.000 It's like, come on. 1.00

03:02:40.000 Be a bitch. 1.00

03:02:40.000 Freak out. 1.00

03:02:41.000 Yeah.

03:02:41.000 I really do keep it together.

03:02:43.000 But...

03:02:43.000 This is also the real argument for microdosing.

03:02:48.000 Because if you could just microdose, there would be so much less negative interactions with people, whether it's on the highway or anywhere. 1.00

03:02:57.000 No one who's microdosing on psilocybin is going to yell at you from across the street, put your fucking mask on! 1.00

03:03:04.000 No. 1.00

03:03:05.000 They're not going to do that.

03:03:05.000 You're going to let them be themselves.

03:03:07.000 Dude, I want to be the person that makes people smile.

03:03:11.000 I don't want to be the person that makes people mad.

03:03:13.000 I don't either.

03:03:14.000 And this is something I'm consciously thinking about more and more as I get older.

03:03:18.000 I want us to do better.

03:03:21.000 I really do.

03:03:22.000 This is one of the reasons why I have this idea of starting over in Texas.

03:03:28.000 I have this idea of disconnecting from all these old hubs and this idea of what we're doing when we're putting out content into the world.

03:03:36.000 I don't believe it.

03:03:37.000 I don't believe it has to be from a media center.

03:03:40.000 I don't believe it has to be from New York or LA. I don't believe it.

03:03:43.000 I want to prove to myself that it doesn't have to be.

03:03:47.000 One of the reasons why I wanted to go to Texas is because it's almost like There's a certain mockery to live in in Texas, you know?

03:03:56.000 Especially for someone like me.

03:03:58.000 I wouldn't want to be you.

03:04:00.000 Everything you do is too studied.

03:04:03.000 And I like being free of that magnifying lens.

03:04:08.000 But to me, whenever I'm thinking about...

03:04:12.000 You know, it's fun to think about, what's the root problem?

03:04:15.000 The root problem seems to be centralization.

03:04:17.000 It's like, wherever centralization rears its head, problems emerge.

03:04:22.000 The root problem is compassion.

03:04:23.000 What do you mean?

03:04:24.000 The root problem is compassion.

03:04:26.000 That we don't make our decisions based on compassion.

03:04:29.000 We make them based on beneficial markers of improvement, whether it's financial improvement or land grabs.

03:04:36.000 That's the problem.

03:04:37.000 The problem is...

03:04:38.000 That we have these things in our head where this is what's the most important, and this is what's not as important.

03:04:46.000 Like, love is important, but if you see two people that are, you know, they're in love, but you don't like either one of them, do you feel like that's the same kind of love as two people you admire that are together?

03:04:57.000 Yeah, right.

03:04:58.000 Like, how many people...

03:04:59.000 Who do you know?

03:05:00.000 Like, alright, I'll give you one idea.

03:05:02.000 Laird Hamilton and Gabriella Reese.

03:05:04.000 I'm friends with those two people.

03:05:06.000 They're super athletes.

03:05:07.000 She was a super athlete in volleyball and he's like one of the greatest big wave surfers the world's ever known.

03:05:16.000 I'm friends with them.

03:05:17.000 And when I talk to them, if I talk to them either on, like, we did a little FaceTime the other day, and I get out of it, I go, that, I want to be somebody who makes me feel, or I want to be somebody who makes somebody feel the way I feel when I talk to them.

03:05:35.000 That's cool.

03:05:35.000 When I talk to those people, I'm like, these are superior people.

03:05:39.000 Laird Hamilton's a weird dude, but he's also a superior human who does these crazy pool workouts with 70-pound dumbbells. 0.95

03:05:46.000 He gets in the fucking sauna at 250 degrees and rides an Airdyne bike with oven mitts on. 0.99

03:05:51.000 Jesus. 1.00

03:05:52.000 Yeah, they're freaks.

03:05:53.000 He wears oven mitts because it burns his hand?

03:05:56.000 Yes!

03:05:56.000 250, 250!

03:06:00.000 You ate at some point!

03:06:01.000 He was like, I gotta put on oven mitts!

03:06:03.000 But he doesn't get out of the sauna!

03:06:06.000 And I said to myself when I got off the phone with them the other day, they're really nice people.

03:06:12.000 They're genuine people.

03:06:13.000 And this is one of the things that happens, and it's a weird thing that happens.

03:06:16.000 When you become more and more famous, you get more and more comfortable talking to other famous people.

03:06:22.000 So you talk to famous people and you realize, oh, they have a hard time talking to people because other people think they're weird.

03:06:28.000 So they have to find famous people that are also nice.

03:06:31.000 And so that's how I feel about them.

03:06:32.000 So I get off the phone with them and I'm like, You can be Gabriella Reese and you can be Laird Hamilton and still come out and be a really cool, friendly, inspirational, genuine person.

03:06:44.000 I'm like, I want to make somebody else feel the way those people make me feel.

03:06:48.000 And that's what I felt like.

03:06:50.000 I love that.

03:06:51.000 That's the best thing we can do for each other.

03:06:53.000 That's the answer.

03:06:54.000 If anything has ever come out of this podcast that's been good, It's that it's given people a perspective where there's a potential where that maybe their limited ideas of what they're capable of in terms of their own personal happiness or their own success and whatever their chosen endeavor is.

03:07:11.000 Maybe it's not really limited.

03:07:14.000 Maybe they can just shift their consciousness and through effort and focus they can change their destiny.

03:07:21.000 Maybe it's true.

03:07:22.000 Well, you know, the reason I say centralization is because like the first and a very natural reaction to being associated with a body would be that you would centralize on the identity that you're in.

03:07:35.000 You know, if I step on your, if I stomp on your foot, you're going to feel pain.

03:07:39.000 So why wouldn't you centralize on this identity that you're in?

03:07:43.000 And again, like right now with the science we have, it can't show us, I think it will eventually show that our sentience isn't limited to the body, that we're a field of consciousness that's kind of getting associated with particular quantum clouds of meat that we call it.

03:07:59.000 And they interface with other sentient bodies in a way that makes them unique To the relationship between that person like I bet you're different with your wife than you are with anybody you've ever met that that is true Yes, but that's also like one of the great like right now one of the big Ideas such a cool idea too is like on stage off stage.

03:08:20.000 So How are you acting when you think you're on stage?

03:08:24.000 In other words like when you're in front of like this is the best part about kovat. 0.99

03:08:27.000 There's no on stage exactly But it's the only good thing about COVID for me.

03:08:34.000 Actually, I'll tell you some other great things about COVID. It taught us that we can telecommute and businesses still work, and that transforms the landscape.

03:08:42.000 But the on-stage, off-stage idea, or the way Cho Gyumtri for Rinpoche puts it is, some people, at the end of the day, they go home and they sit on the couch, and they go...

03:08:56.000 But they only let themselves do that at the very end of the day of work because they've produced in their mind a situation where this is me relaxing and this is me working.

03:09:05.000 Here I am with my family.

03:09:07.000 Here I am with my co-workers.

03:09:09.000 So this differentiation produces a kind of neurotic kind of split personality way of being which is like really all those you don't need to wait to get home to sit on the couch to go That's where you're at now.

03:09:27.000 That's actually every single thing.

03:09:29.000 But the story you're telling yourself produces moments where this is a relaxing time and this is a non-relaxing time.

03:09:37.000 But it's just a story, Joe.

03:09:39.000 That's the idea.

03:09:40.000 And compassion is, I think, the beginning of recognizing, you know, how many people have you met?

03:09:47.000 And I know my life changed when I went to the doctor. 0.98

03:09:51.000 With my swollen fucking testicle that, by the way, before I went to the doctor, I would look at myself in the mirror and think, man, if they were symmetrical, I would feel awesome. 0.99

03:10:01.000 Like, it felt good to have a big ball. 1.00

03:10:03.000 There was like...

03:10:10.000 You were happy about the one big ball.

03:10:12.000 It looked powerful.

03:10:13.000 I'm not gonna lie, man. 0.99

03:10:15.000 Have you ever seen Joey Diaz's balls? 0.99

03:10:17.000 Yeah, like that. 1.00

03:10:18.000 They're preposterous.

03:10:19.000 He feels like that every day.

03:10:20.000 They don't even make sense. 0.99

03:10:22.000 Jamie, have you seen Joey's balls? 0.99

03:10:25.000 See if you can pull up the picture of Joey on stage where he's naked with a... 0.99

03:10:30.000 I know, I know, but just for me.

03:10:33.000 He had a safety pin and a towel around his neck like a cape.

03:10:39.000 And this was for my 1999 Warner Brothers CD called I'm Gonna Be Dead Someday.

03:10:45.000 We took these crazy pictures in the main room of the Comedy Store.

03:10:48.000 Dude, I was there!

03:10:50.000 You were there for those pictures?

03:10:51.000 The Matador outfit.

03:10:52.000 There was some drama about it.

03:10:54.000 You were there for that?

03:10:55.000 You guys snuck in and took the pictures.

03:10:57.000 Were you working?

03:10:58.000 I was the talent coordinator.

03:10:59.000 You guys snuck in and took the pictures.

03:11:01.000 No, we didn't snuck in. 1.00

03:11:03.000 We talked to whoever the fuck it was. 0.99

03:11:05.000 It was me. 0.99

03:11:06.000 Was it Scott Day or Tommy?

03:11:07.000 I'm sorry.

03:11:07.000 I feel like I was there when I happened.

03:11:08.000 I could be wrong, but I remember the Matador pictures.

03:11:10.000 No, Warner Brothers did it.

03:11:12.000 Maybe I'm wrong.

03:11:12.000 They made calls.

03:11:13.000 No, the Matador picture was real.

03:11:15.000 I'm sorry, but I remember a moment.

03:11:17.000 I think I was a talent coordinator where suddenly there's pictures of Joey Diaz in a matador outfit.

03:11:25.000 There's the funniest thing you've ever seen.

03:11:27.000 But Mitzi caught wind of it.

03:11:29.000 That's what I remember is there was some drama around the situation.

03:11:33.000 The pictures themselves were not just funny.

03:11:36.000 They were kind of artistic.

03:11:37.000 They looked cool.

03:11:38.000 There's a picture of Joey.

03:11:41.000 Please someone find this.

03:11:44.000 It's in...

03:11:44.000 I think I have the CD, so I have it.

03:11:47.000 It's on the CD, so I have it. 0.78

03:11:50.000 Because when I'm moving, I'm going through my shit, and one of the things I found is those old I'm Gonna Be Dead Someday CDs. 0.90

03:11:57.000 That's 99. I became... 0.98

03:12:00.000 Joey Diaz' associate and best friend around 96. That's when I met him.

03:12:06.000 I could be wrong when I was there.

03:12:08.000 I just remember there was some drama.

03:12:09.000 No, you might have been there if you were there in 99. When did you start working?

03:12:13.000 I don't remember.

03:12:14.000 I don't remember the exact date.

03:12:15.000 And again, I don't remember.

03:12:16.000 I just remember there was some drama around.

03:12:18.000 I think it was before your time, man.

03:12:19.000 I want to feel like it's before your time.

03:12:21.000 Dude, it could easily be that Mitzi caught wind of the pictures late or something.

03:12:26.000 I just remember there was some drama attached.

03:12:30.000 That lady was so nice to me. 1.00

03:12:32.000 She loved you, man.

03:12:33.000 She loved Joey, too.

03:12:34.000 She loved both of us.

03:12:36.000 She had the funnest thing with her idea of us together.

03:12:41.000 She loved that we were together, that we were friends.

03:12:44.000 She was a wild beast. 0.96

03:12:46.000 She was a wild lady. 1.00

03:12:47.000 She was wild, dude. 1.00

03:12:48.000 That was a real guru.

03:12:49.000 Mitzi Shore was an actual guru.

03:12:51.000 Yeah.

03:12:52.000 Listen, man, I tell everybody, if there's one human being that's the most important human being in comedy ever that wasn't a comedian, it's Mitzi Shore.

03:13:00.000 That's why she's on the wall of this room.

03:13:03.000 She was a guru.

03:13:04.000 I'm taking her with me, man.

03:13:06.000 Not only that, the movers don't take her. 0.93

03:13:08.000 I take her.

03:13:10.000 Mitzi's coming with me on the plane.

03:13:12.000 Yeah, man.

03:13:13.000 She was real.

03:13:14.000 Listen, that's coming with me on the plane. 0.85

03:13:16.000 No bullshit. 0.94

03:13:17.000 Yeah. 0.85

03:13:18.000 Like, the reason why that's up on the wall after the movers have gone is that's coming with me.

03:13:23.000 Yeah.

03:13:23.000 That's Mitzi.

03:13:24.000 Yeah.

03:13:25.000 She gave me my future.

03:13:29.000 No, she was wild. 0.97

03:13:30.000 She was a wild animal. 1.00

03:13:31.000 She was a crazy lady. 1.00

03:13:32.000 She's a perfect person to run the comedy store. 0.99

03:13:34.000 Well, no, she had to be that way.

03:13:36.000 You can't have...

03:13:38.000 If you go through...

03:13:39.000 There's photos in the album where you can see Joey with a cape.

03:13:45.000 He had this... 0.99

03:13:48.000 Goddamn. 1.00

03:13:49.000 I know I have it. 0.99

03:13:51.000 I know I have it somewhere.

03:13:52.000 I'll find it.

03:13:53.000 It's on one of my folders.

03:13:54.000 You know what was in her when you walk into her house?

03:13:56.000 Just Joey Diaz cape balls. 0.75

03:13:59.000 You know what was in her house? 0.71

03:14:01.000 On Doheny when you walk into her house?

03:14:03.000 No.

03:14:04.000 So on her house, when you walk in, the first thing you see is...

03:14:10.000 What do you call it when people sew and they make art with sew?

03:14:15.000 Crochet.

03:14:16.000 A crocheted...

03:14:20.000 Picture.

03:14:20.000 On it it said, dying is easy, comedy is hard.

03:14:27.000 That's the first thing you set eyes on!

03:14:31.000 It is true.

03:14:33.000 And that was what was beautiful about her is she understood how hard comedy was.

03:14:37.000 I told you the story of her getting robbed, right?

03:14:39.000 I told you that story.

03:14:40.000 Which story is that?

03:14:41.000 Tell me again.

03:14:42.000 So here's how cool she was. 1.00

03:14:44.000 And I can't remember the name of the comic, but she was giving him spots.

03:14:49.000 I can't remember the name of the comic.

03:14:50.000 This was in the early...

03:14:51.000 It's better you don't say than that.

03:14:52.000 Yeah, it's better I don't say. 1.00

03:14:54.000 So this motherfucker needed money. 1.00

03:14:56.000 And he robbed the van. 1.00

03:14:59.000 She was in the van.

03:15:00.000 Like, apparently, he, like, at gunpoint, took the cash earnings of the club at gunpoint.

03:15:10.000 Like, took the money from her.

03:15:12.000 And she knew who it was somehow.

03:15:14.000 She could tell somehow from the mask he didn't do a good...

03:15:16.000 She just knew.

03:15:17.000 Right.

03:15:18.000 And I remember her saying, like, yeah, he robbed me at gunpoint, but he's funny.

03:15:24.000 But he's funny!

03:15:29.000 That was her! 0.98

03:15:31.000 But that was her! 1.00

03:15:32.000 Like, can you imagine, like, if you really think about it, you get robbed at gunpoint by a comedian, and you still give him stage time, What the fuck is that? 0.99

03:15:45.000 Well, that's a guru. 0.98

03:15:47.000 That's not a normal person anymore.

03:15:51.000 I've never had that sort of a relationship with any human ever.

03:15:56.000 You know, I sought her out when I was living in Boston.

03:15:59.000 Really?

03:16:00.000 Yes.

03:16:00.000 You knew about her?

03:16:01.000 Oh, dude.

03:16:03.000 When I was an open-miker, okay, I had gotten obsessed with comedy for six months before I could ever do an open-mic night, because I erroneously assumed that you had to be 21 to be able to get on stage.

03:16:14.000 It turns out you can be younger, but you just can't drink to watch you.

03:16:18.000 But you can be a 19-year-old and do stand-up.

03:16:20.000 I didn't know.

03:16:21.000 So August 27th, 1988, When I turned 21, I went on stage.

03:16:27.000 And when I went on stage, I remember thinking...

03:16:32.000 I remember really clearly thinking, like, how weird is this job?

03:16:42.000 There's a bunch of people out there that can just talk.

03:16:46.000 And they can make a living.

03:16:48.000 Yeah.

03:16:48.000 How weird is this job?

03:16:50.000 What did you think the first time you ever went on stage and you talked into a microphone?

03:16:54.000 Hello?

03:16:55.000 Hi, my name is Duncan Trussell.

03:16:57.000 So weird.

03:17:02.000 Like when you look back at those times, like how do you feel?

03:17:06.000 You feel like it's not even you.

03:17:08.000 I met that lady when I met Mitzi Shore. 1.00

03:17:11.000 And when Mitzi Shore passed me at the Comedy Store, I remember thinking when I was in 1988 in Boston that there was this Mecca.

03:17:19.000 There was this place you had to go where Richard Pryor filmed live at the Sunset Strip, and Sam Kennison used to do stand-up, and fucking Howie Mandel went up, and Rodney Dangerfield, and David Letterman! 0.99

03:17:33.000 Goddamn, I gotta get to the Comedy Store! 0.99

03:17:35.000 That's all they wanted to do. 0.98

03:17:37.000 I didn't want to get anywhere else.

03:17:38.000 There was one part of me that wanted to go to Houston, because I had heard that Sam Kennison did these wild shows in Houston.

03:17:44.000 I wanted to go to Houston.

03:17:46.000 But the big thing for me was I got to get to the store.

03:17:50.000 And when I got passed by that lady, dude, you know, it's one of the reasons why I feel so compelled to help people on this podcast. 0.96

03:17:59.000 It's because I feel like when that lady passed me, I was like, holy shit. 0.91

03:18:04.000 Like, I'm a real comedian now. 0.99

03:18:07.000 Yeah, man.

03:18:07.000 Like, I don't have to be scared.

03:18:08.000 I just have to keep working.

03:18:10.000 Yeah.

03:18:10.000 I got passed by the godmother, the real godmother.

03:18:15.000 Yeah.

03:18:17.000 Like, you worked for that lady. 0.96

03:18:19.000 That's right.

03:18:20.000 You were there all the time, man.

03:18:22.000 I know.

03:18:23.000 Can't go back.

03:18:24.000 She made us... 0.97

03:18:27.000 She created an environment that accelerated comedy.

03:18:30.000 Yeah, man. 0.99

03:18:31.000 She pushed comedy because she kept it together, but like at the fucking highest... 1.00

03:18:37.000 Like at 9,000 RPMs of the engines going... 0.98

03:18:42.000 She kept it together.

03:18:44.000 She let these comics be wild.

03:18:46.000 You remember when Ari slapped Bobby Lee? 1.00

03:18:48.000 Of course I remember.

03:18:50.000 Do you know that's when he started getting spots?

03:18:55.000 Is that true?

03:18:57.000 Yeah.

03:18:58.000 You know, I know because I was jealous.

03:19:00.000 I was the talent coordinator.

03:19:01.000 I remember Ari's gradually unraveling into his comedic self.

03:19:07.000 And I remember Ari smacks Bobby Lee. 1.00

03:19:10.000 There was a fight between Ari and Bobby Lee. 0.91

03:19:12.000 And I remember as the talent coordinator, that was when Mitzi starts kissing.

03:19:18.000 He's now a comic somewhere in that like in that like throwing off of Rationality and that I don't know what it was man like in you know you though Here's the most important part of Mitzi.

03:19:30.000 She was a woman She was a woman and she encouraged chaos. 1.00

03:19:34.000 She wasn't in remotely concerned with safety She wanted wild people, man.

03:19:41.000 Dude, she wanted me to be wild.

03:19:44.000 That's what she wanted.

03:19:45.000 She wanted wild comedy.

03:19:46.000 She wanted Kinison. 0.99

03:19:47.000 She wanted Pryor.

03:19:49.000 She wanted everyone that came in between.

03:19:51.000 Damon Wayans.

03:19:53.000 She wanted wild.

03:19:55.000 She wanted Martin Lawrence.

03:19:57.000 She wanted wild.

03:19:59.000 Yeah, she wasn't domestic. 0.99

03:20:01.000 She was feral. 0.66

03:20:02.000 Mitzi was a feral lady. 1.00

03:20:03.000 Mitzi was a human.

03:20:04.000 I mean, what we call human now, people think of as feral.

03:20:08.000 No, I mean, but when I say feral, I mean exceptional.

03:20:13.000 She was wild.

03:20:14.000 She didn't have anybody else's rules holding her back.

03:20:17.000 No, no.

03:20:17.000 And she didn't...

03:20:19.000 Fucking care. 1.00

03:20:20.000 She didn't care. 1.00

03:20:21.000 She didn't care about money. 1.00

03:20:23.000 She was all, fuck you. 1.00

03:20:24.000 That's the most important thing about her is like having a club on the Sunset Strip and not making decisions based on money. 1.00

03:20:33.000 Yeah. 0.95

03:20:33.000 Because let me tell you, man, as a talent coordinator, there are plenty of times Where people wanted to film some shit in the main room, where they wanted to pay a lot of money. 0.95

03:20:42.000 And she'd be like, no, get it now. 1.00

03:20:44.000 Tell them the fuck. 0.99

03:20:44.000 Well, we should talk about that, because that was like one of the things about that club, was that like you could never film anything there. 0.99

03:20:51.000 No!

03:20:51.000 That was one of the most amazing things about Ari filming his special there.

03:20:56.000 It was a really cool thing he did.

03:20:57.000 It was also like an acknowledgement that the world had changed.

03:21:01.000 And that was one of the reasons why I was willing to come back. 0.99

03:21:03.000 It's because Ari filmed his shit in the OR. Well, she would have... 0.99

03:21:09.000 I really do believe she would have approved that eventually.

03:21:12.000 Sure, but somebody would have got involved. 0.98

03:21:13.000 They would have fucked it up. 0.98

03:21:14.000 She would have made him jump through some hoops. 0.98

03:21:16.000 It wouldn't have been that easy. 1.00

03:21:18.000 She would have made him do some crazy shit. 1.00

03:21:20.000 And she's right. 1.00

03:21:20.000 Here's the thing. 1.00

03:21:21.000 She's right.

03:21:22.000 You know, I didn't...

03:21:23.000 I didn't cash any of my checks You probably know that Oh, I remember.

03:21:30.000 When I was working at the store, I just wouldn't cash my checks.

03:21:33.000 And then they would go, hey, we have all this money, can I donate it?

03:21:38.000 To the sound system?

03:21:39.000 You bought the sound system there?

03:21:40.000 I did that too, but that was extra.

03:21:42.000 That was on top of that. 0.98

03:21:43.000 Because the sound system was fucking up. 0.98

03:21:45.000 And then you bought it. 0.96

03:21:46.000 And honestly, Mitzi didn't want you to do that.

03:21:48.000 Because that was the thing.

03:21:50.000 She was smart enough to know, if I let a comedian buy the sound system, I can't, like, honestly give them spots. 0.94

03:22:01.000 I knew that was the case, but I was like, at this point, she's giving me spots every fucking weekend. 0.96

03:22:07.000 I just want to help out. 0.95

03:22:08.000 Let's stop playing games.

03:22:10.000 Like, come on, you know what I'm doing.

03:22:11.000 I'm out here doing my best stand-up I can. 0.99

03:22:14.000 We got a fucked up speaker system. 0.98

03:22:16.000 Let's fix it. 0.99

03:22:17.000 I put a DAT system in there.

03:22:19.000 I put a mini-disc.

03:22:21.000 And I wanted to have it set up so anybody could, like, if you had a mini-disc, remember the mini-disc days?

03:22:26.000 Of course.

03:22:27.000 Dude, it was so important before smartphones to be able to record your shows.

03:22:30.000 Yeah.

03:22:31.000 It's so big.

03:22:32.000 And you don't record and listen to all of them, but the option to be able to do that is so huge.

03:22:38.000 Even if you're not diligent, you still gain like 10, 20% of tightening of your act.

03:22:45.000 Dude, the comedy store...

03:22:47.000 At that time, for lack of a better word, was an art cult.

03:22:51.000 That's what it was.

03:22:53.000 It was a cult.

03:22:54.000 It was a cult that was for sure...

03:22:58.000 All cult systems are based on a strong, charismatic, central leader.

03:23:02.000 And that was Mitzi.

03:23:03.000 But you know what?

03:23:04.000 As a man, I was happy to relent to Mitzi. 0.73

03:23:11.000 But there was a thing for me, as this macho man, It was important.

03:23:16.000 It was hard.

03:23:17.000 It was important to relent to Mitzi.

03:23:21.000 You had to.

03:23:22.000 But it wasn't just that I had to.

03:23:24.000 I wanted to.

03:23:25.000 To show respect.

03:23:28.000 To show that I got it.

03:23:31.000 To show that I know what you did.

03:23:33.000 Yeah, man. 0.99

03:23:33.000 Like that lady, man, when I was in fucking Boston in 88, I would hear about her. 0.99

03:23:40.000 She loved comedy. 0.98

03:23:41.000 And I'd be like, this one lady did this? 1.00

03:23:43.000 Like, yeah, she was married to a comedian, but it didn't work out.

03:23:46.000 And she's Pauly Shore's mom.

03:23:49.000 And I would hear these stories, and I'd be like, that's crazy.

03:23:52.000 This one lady just figured it out. 1.00

03:23:53.000 And she was wild.

03:23:55.000 And she liked to party.

03:23:57.000 And she liked men.

03:23:58.000 And she was just a wild lady. 1.00

03:24:00.000 But she was brutal with you. 0.96

03:24:02.000 She didn't like your comedy.

03:24:03.000 She would just tell you.

03:24:05.000 You are done.

03:24:06.000 She would just tell you.

03:24:08.000 If she thought you weren't funny, you were done.

03:24:10.000 Dude, she put her hand on my wrist. 1.00

03:24:12.000 She goes, you're really funny.

03:24:14.000 And I'll never forget that.

03:24:17.000 It was like 1994. I was like, oh my god.

03:24:22.000 Well, she wouldn't hand that out lightly, man.

03:24:24.000 That was the thing.

03:24:25.000 She was like...

03:24:28.000 I've been around it, man.

03:24:31.000 I'm so lucky because I got to be around Ram Dass and Mitzi Shore.

03:24:35.000 They're similar in a way, man.

03:24:37.000 Yes, they are!

03:24:38.000 They're similar.

03:24:40.000 There's a lot of differences.

03:24:41.000 This idea of what we think of as perspective.

03:24:46.000 Realization.

03:24:47.000 Yeah.

03:24:48.000 Dude.

03:24:49.000 Mitzi was an artist.

03:24:51.000 1994, when I was six years into comedy, her putting her hand on my wrist and telling me I'm really funny changed my life.

03:24:58.000 Look, to me the thing that like...

03:25:02.000 Will never be captured is that it's not just that here.

03:25:06.000 You have this like tiny woman who is Tiny tiny, but it's not just that you have this being be so careful when I would hug her.

03:25:15.000 Yeah, right.

03:25:16.000 Remember hugging Mitzi. 0.84

03:25:17.000 Yeah Yeah, well, she was a gangster. 1.00

03:25:20.000 I mean that was all like the thing about Mitzi was like No, like imagine like the best thing to think of is like think of your most like outlaw comedian Then imagine a person who built a saloon within which those comedians could be grown to be more of an outlaw.

03:25:37.000 There was no Kennison without Mitzi Shore.

03:25:39.000 That's right. 0.99

03:25:40.000 But then the most, to me, like with Mitzi, and she would never allow this, she'd already, if she heard me saying any of this shit, she'd be like, you're fired. 0.71

03:25:49.000 But like if you were gonna write a Mitzi Bible and you wanted to like base the whole Bible on one thing it was something she told me so many times as a talent coordinator and I like to fantasize she thought I was funny but as a talent coordinator something she told me over and over and over again regarding comedians was you don't need them they need you That was her like core thing,

03:26:19.000 which is like the moment that a comedian starts thinking that they need this system, then they degrade themselves.

03:26:27.000 They have to understand that their Comedic ability and who they are as that persona, which she would say is like, they're iconoclasts.

03:26:37.000 She meant like, you're not gonna find anyone like this ever again.

03:26:40.000 And that's who she was trying to find.

03:26:42.000 She would say, therefore, it's supply and demand, which is like, there is nothing like you, but there's a lot of things like them.

03:26:50.000 So if you think that you need them, you will degrade yourself as an artist.

03:26:55.000 That was her main core truth, which is don't get caught up in the thing they're going to try to teach you, which is you need them.

03:27:03.000 You don't need the manager.

03:27:04.000 You don't need the agent.

03:27:06.000 You don't need the studio.

03:27:07.000 You don't need anything because you're funny. 1.00

03:27:10.000 You're the fucking nuclear isotope generating energy. 0.99

03:27:13.000 And if you get lost in this insanity that you require the system to be great, not only to degrade yourself, You do great in art. 0.98

03:27:22.000 But you know, this is one of the things about recognizing what Mitzi Shore did and A lot of Bud Friedman, a lot of people who own clubs, Rodney Dangerfield, is it's not just about the ideas and getting the ideas out in a way the audience can digest.

03:27:41.000 It's setting up a club.

03:27:43.000 It's bringing people in.

03:27:45.000 It's setting a standard where people know, hey man, David Letterman came out of here.

03:27:50.000 Robin Williams came out of here.

03:27:52.000 Okay? 0.99

03:27:53.000 Bill Hicks was a fucking doorman here. 1.00

03:27:56.000 Sam Kinison came out of here, okay? 1.00

03:27:58.000 This is the motherfucking comedy story. 0.99

03:28:02.000 This is standard. 0.99

03:28:03.000 And that's a factor too, man. 0.96

03:28:05.000 You can't let the artists completely be in control because one charismatic artist with a lot of fucking song and dance moves can trick people into thinking things that aren't necessarily accurate because of charisma. 0.96

03:28:18.000 That's true, man. 0.97

03:28:20.000 She figured that out, though.

03:28:21.000 Yeah.

03:28:22.000 And we need another one of her, man.

03:28:25.000 You're never going to get another Mitzi. 0.81

03:28:27.000 But we can carry on her legacy.

03:28:30.000 We all learned from her.

03:28:33.000 And I think she was uniquely qualified.

03:28:37.000 To run the Comedy Store because she wasn't a comic. 0.91

03:28:40.000 She had no desire to be a comic.

03:28:42.000 But she was married to a comic and she knew exactly what comics were.

03:28:47.000 Her son was a comic.

03:28:48.000 Yeah.

03:28:48.000 She knew exactly what comics were.

03:28:50.000 And she wasn't stupid. 0.93

03:28:52.000 She was smart and she was... 1.00

03:28:53.000 But she also didn't give a fuck. 0.99

03:28:57.000 There's a rare... 0.99

03:28:59.000 Group of people that legitimately don't give a fuck. 1.00

03:29:02.000 She didn't give a fuck. 1.00

03:29:02.000 If Mitzi Shore was alive today, if we could somehow or another go back in time and grab Mitzi Shore from 1974 and bring her to 2020, she would just be running shit. 1.00

03:29:14.000 She would just be running shit. 0.98

03:29:16.000 First of all, she would have 100 girls under contract for OnlyFans accounts. 0.99

03:29:22.000 She would just run people. 1.00

03:29:24.000 I'll tell you the one time.

03:29:26.000 That part's not true.

03:29:27.000 The OnlyFans.

03:29:28.000 It's conjecture, but I'll tell you the one time.

03:29:30.000 Do you have a problem with OnlyFans?

03:29:32.000 The porn site?

03:29:33.000 It's not a porn site, though.

03:29:35.000 It's like girls can do whatever they want. 1.00

03:29:38.000 I don't have a problem with sex. 0.98

03:29:40.000 I have a problem with my own inability to regulate my desire to cum.

03:29:47.000 I can't get mad at the world for that.

03:29:49.000 I had a conversation with someone and they were saying, well, also, she has an OnlyFans site.

03:29:55.000 I'm like, hmm. 1.00

03:29:56.000 If I had big tits, I'd be getting paid for those big tits. 1.00

03:29:59.000 I'm so tired of these sex-negative fucks, man. 1.00

03:30:02.000 It ramped up during the lockdown, though, because it became an easy job for a lot of people. 1.00

03:30:08.000 If I was 22 and I had big tits, And I like to do squats. 1.00

03:30:14.000 And I was sitting around thinking, do I want to work at Burger King? 1.00

03:30:18.000 Or do I want to shake my ass for $10 a month for 35,000 guys? 0.99

03:30:27.000 It doesn't have to just be that, though, either. 1.00

03:30:29.000 It's not just a porn star. 0.66

03:30:30.000 You can do whatever. 0.88

03:30:30.000 It's Patreon for, you know... 0.88

03:30:32.000 Right!

03:30:32.000 This is madness!

03:30:33.000 You can wear a bikini!

03:30:35.000 You can just do yoga.

03:30:36.000 But, Joe, in, like, a dimension where, like, being funny is getting people to come, you'd be, like, the top porn star in that dimension!

03:30:45.000 It's just...

03:30:45.000 That's a weird one, right?

03:30:46.000 Like, getting people to come is so specific.

03:30:48.000 It's what's the big deal.

03:30:49.000 It doesn't matter.

03:30:50.000 It shouldn't be a big deal, but yet it is.

03:30:53.000 Like, if you find out that somebody came...

03:30:56.000 It's not a big deal.

03:30:57.000 It shouldn't be, but it is. 0.96

03:30:58.000 It is right now, because we're lunatics. 0.95

03:31:00.000 We hate life. 0.98

03:31:02.000 Exactly. 1.00

03:31:03.000 Yeah, we're so death-centric that anything that's the source of life, which is a handjob, a blowjob, fucking, we look at that as being depraved. 1.00

03:31:14.000 You know? 0.99

03:31:15.000 Well, it's really just some sort of weird canyon ladder in between two fucking cliffs between this and what is gonna be available for people in just a few years. 0.99

03:31:26.000 There's gonna be virtual sex. 0.99

03:31:27.000 You gotta have Riley Reid on, man. 0.99

03:31:29.000 She's so great.

03:31:30.000 Like, I had her on my podcast.

03:31:31.000 You have her on and I'll take my pants off. 1.00

03:31:33.000 What I'm gonna do is...

03:31:34.000 No, she's so funny! 0.99

03:31:35.000 She's cool.

03:31:36.000 Goggles on.

03:31:37.000 This is the future.

03:31:38.000 Goggles.

03:31:39.000 Put goggles on.

03:31:40.000 You lay back.

03:31:41.000 You're in another world.

03:31:43.000 Well, yeah.

03:31:44.000 I mean, that's heaven.

03:31:45.000 But like...

03:31:46.000 But is it?

03:31:48.000 Yes!

03:31:48.000 No.

03:31:49.000 What's wrong with cumming? 1.00

03:31:50.000 Because there's 1% of your brain that knows it's bullshit. 1.00

03:31:54.000 Why? 1.00

03:31:54.000 There's no real girl, and they don't really like you, and your jokes suck. 1.00

03:31:59.000 And you kind of smell, and you didn't brush your teeth that good. 0.99

03:32:02.000 Yeah?

03:32:03.000 Yeah.

03:32:03.000 But she's like, I love that part of you.

03:32:06.000 And the girl's like, mmmm. 1.00

03:32:06.000 No, the girl... 1.00

03:32:07.000 Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

03:32:08.000 If the girl really did love that part of you, that would be extraordinary.

03:32:13.000 See, that's the beauty of alcohol.

03:32:16.000 Alcohol is, you're hanging out with a girl who's got a, like, Hello Kitty tattoo in between her thumb and forefinger, and you guys are drinking, you're having a good time, and you're like, I love you, and she's like, I love you too, and you just give each other a hug.

03:32:28.000 It doesn't even have to be sexual.

03:32:30.000 That's where alcohol comes in. 0.99

03:32:32.000 Where?

03:32:33.000 Where?

03:32:34.000 Where?

03:32:35.000 What do you mean?

03:32:36.000 What do you mean?

03:32:37.000 I'm following you in the Hello Kitty, where does alcohol come in?

03:32:42.000 That's where alcohol comes in. 0.99

03:32:44.000 It allows you to take chances and hope that the other person doesn't have ulterior motives.

03:32:50.000 Oh, right.

03:32:50.000 Where you both release your ambitions and run, let's go to Vegas and get married.

03:32:54.000 I don't even know you. 0.81

03:32:56.000 Let's go crazy. 1.00

03:32:58.000 How crazy is it that we think fucking's bad? 1.00

03:33:00.000 It's not that we think fucking's bad. 1.00

03:33:04.000 It's that we worry you fuck too many people. 1.00

03:33:07.000 Why? 1.00

03:33:07.000 Why is that a word? 1.00

03:33:08.000 You got tricked too many times.

03:33:09.000 You're like one of those people at one of those David Blaine street shows, and you're like, it's gotta be the Queen of Hearts!

03:33:15.000 Trust me!

03:33:16.000 Isn't that wild?

03:33:17.000 It's like, it's the great, it's one of the great things.

03:33:20.000 It really is one of the great things.

03:33:21.000 Like, think of, like, any time, like, You know why?

03:33:25.000 Why?

03:33:26.000 Because we're concentrated more on innovation and progress in terms of numbers.

03:33:33.000 So weird.

03:33:35.000 But earning money and getting new projects passed through They take precedent over everything else.

03:33:45.000 So sick.

03:33:46.000 It's weird.

03:33:47.000 But it's a weird game.

03:33:49.000 This is what I'm getting out of this book, Irresistible.

03:33:52.000 There's things that we have in our head where we have these...

03:34:00.000 They're wrong.

03:34:01.000 We have these ideas of what we need in order to be sufficient.

03:34:07.000 We're operating from the wrong principles.

03:34:09.000 Wait, I'm sorry, Joe.

03:34:10.000 I gotta pee.

03:34:10.000 I've been holding it for like 10 minutes.

03:34:12.000 I'm sorry.

03:34:13.000 Go pee.

03:34:13.000 I don't want it to end, man.

03:34:15.000 We don't have to end.

03:34:16.000 Go pee.

03:34:17.000 This is the first show ever on Spotify.

03:34:19.000 I can't believe I get to pee here!

03:34:20.000 I gotta go.

03:34:21.000 I looked on your...

03:34:22.000 Go pee, bro.

03:34:24.000 Go pee.

03:34:25.000 Jesus, go pee. 1.00

03:34:27.000 No voting.

03:34:29.000 There's no voting.

03:34:32.000 Isn't he funny?

03:34:33.000 I wasn't even in the voting.

03:34:35.000 Duncan Trussell, I wanted you to be guest number one.

03:34:41.000 It's important.

03:34:43.000 Guest number two.

03:34:46.000 Miley Cyrus.

03:34:48.000 That's right.

03:34:50.000 Number two.

03:34:51.000 That's what I said.

03:34:54.000 I said guest number two.

03:34:57.000 You don't even listen.

03:34:58.000 We're like an old married couple, Jamie.

03:35:00.000 It sounds like I said guest number two.

03:35:03.000 I'm drunk.

03:35:04.000 I'm high.

03:35:05.000 Guest number two is Miley Cyrus. 0.99

03:35:07.000 Guest number three, Mike motherfucking Tyson. 0.98

03:35:11.000 How about that? 0.96

03:35:17.000 Jamie, are you concerned at all about moving to Texas?

03:35:22.000 No.

03:35:23.000 That's what I like about you.

03:35:25.000 It's one of many things.

03:35:28.000 But you're ready to roll.

03:35:29.000 Like, I should just tell the people at home.

03:35:31.000 I brought it up with Jamie.

03:35:32.000 I'm like, I'm thinking about moving to Texas.

03:35:36.000 Jamie goes, okay.

03:35:41.000 Is that accurate?

03:35:42.000 Yeah, I mean, it's going to happen.

03:35:45.000 Something was coming.

03:35:47.000 Something was going to happen.

03:35:48.000 What did you think was going to happen?

03:35:49.000 What was the worst case scenario?

03:35:51.000 Like Montana?

03:35:52.000 I don't know.

03:35:53.000 I didn't think that was going to happen.

03:35:54.000 I don't know.

03:35:55.000 I just didn't want you to not want to do it.

03:35:59.000 I wasn't worried about it.

03:36:00.000 Good.

03:36:01.000 Happy.

03:36:07.000 It's hard.

03:36:07.000 I feel like I'm prolonging this out of a neurotic.

03:36:10.000 You're not prolonging anything.

03:36:11.000 This is fun.

03:36:12.000 Jamie and I just had a love fest.

03:36:14.000 Oh, that's great.

03:36:16.000 I was asking Jamie if there was ever a time where I was telling him we're moving to Texas where he was like, oh, I don't want to do that.

03:36:24.000 But he's like, no.

03:36:25.000 But when I brought it up, I'm like, what do you think?

03:36:28.000 And he's like, okay.

03:36:30.000 That's cool.

03:36:31.000 I do feel like I'm stretching it out.

03:36:33.000 What does it mean, man?

03:36:35.000 This is the first episode on Spotify.

03:36:37.000 I love that.

03:36:38.000 It's supposed to be you.

03:36:39.000 I love it.

03:36:39.000 It's supposed to be you.

03:36:40.000 It's beautiful, but also there's a piece of me that like...

03:36:42.000 Duncan, I think we can work things out together.

03:36:44.000 I really do.

03:36:44.000 I think you and me together have a unique perspective, and I'm not bullshitting.

03:36:48.000 I agree.

03:36:49.000 And I don't think it's...

03:36:50.000 I'm not taking ownership, and you shouldn't either.

03:36:53.000 It's the two of us together...

03:36:56.000 I know.

03:36:56.000 There's a weird thing that happens.

03:36:57.000 I feel it, man.

03:36:59.000 Like, look, it's my favorite thing, which is why I don't want it to end, which is why I'm like, look, man, I'm a Buddhist.

03:37:06.000 I know I'm going to die.

03:37:08.000 What does that mean, though?

03:37:09.000 When you say you're a Buddhist, shouldn't we have a new thing? 0.98

03:37:12.000 You said, like, communism, socialism.

03:37:15.000 I love it, Joe.

03:37:16.000 I love it.

03:37:17.000 Can't we have a new one?

03:37:18.000 I think we can, but I do want to, like, the reason I'm going to speak up for Buddhism in general...

03:37:23.000 and i agree with you and what i love about buddhism so much is that man what's great about it is it invites you to reject it it says to you the first part of it is like reject this if you can like if you can find a flaw in the thing Reject it.

03:37:41.000 And also, if you can find a legitimate rejection, then we will add that to the, like, what Buddhism...

03:37:48.000 Tenants of Buddhism.

03:37:49.000 Yeah, so that's what I love about it, because it's more of a process.

03:37:53.000 That's perfect.

03:37:54.000 Yeah, it's perfect.

03:37:55.000 And it has to be that way.

03:37:57.000 It has to be that way.

03:37:58.000 If you're thinking about how to progress with ideas...

03:38:01.000 Yeah, man.

03:38:01.000 You have to be able to say, hey, bring me a counter idea that makes more sense.

03:38:05.000 And I'll reconsider it.

03:38:06.000 But it's what we were talking about earlier. 1.00

03:38:08.000 People are married to their goddamn ideas. 1.00

03:38:11.000 It's sad. 1.00

03:38:11.000 It's not just sad. 1.00

03:38:13.000 It is sad, for sure.

03:38:14.000 But it's also, it's bad for all of us.

03:38:17.000 And it's one of those things that we should recognize.

03:38:19.000 Just like, you know, like negative feedback.

03:38:22.000 Like, oh, I'm so fat. 1.00

03:38:24.000 Oh, I'm such a fucking loser. 1.00

03:38:25.000 Everybody admits that that is not good for you. 1.00

03:38:27.000 And it actually hinders process.

03:38:29.000 Yeah.

03:38:30.000 Progress.

03:38:31.000 I think that it hinders progress as well.

03:38:34.000 I think we have to look at things in a more positive way.

03:38:37.000 That's so weird, dude.

03:38:40.000 There's this teacher, Jack Kornfield.

03:38:42.000 He's so smart.

03:38:43.000 He's a Buddhist teacher.

03:38:44.000 And I remember in the early days of the Ram Dass retreats, I would do these podcasts with him.

03:38:49.000 And I remember being like, I want to get in shape.

03:38:53.000 I feel like I'm fat.

03:38:54.000 And what he said to me was, get in shape because you love yourself, not because you hate yourself.

03:39:01.000 Don't get in shape because you are...

03:39:06.000 Angry at who you are right now.

03:39:08.000 Get in shape because you think you deserve to be in shape.

03:39:11.000 That's cute.

03:39:12.000 That sounds like a guy who's never been fat.

03:39:14.000 Listen to me. 1.00

03:39:15.000 Pussy! 1.00

03:39:16.000 Hey! 1.00

03:39:17.000 He's not a pussy! 1.00

03:39:18.000 Competition's real, motherfucker! 1.00

03:39:20.000 Sometimes you just gotta get in shape. 1.00

03:39:22.000 Look, fat shaming works. 0.79

03:39:25.000 This is what people don't like to admit. 0.99

03:39:27.000 That shame makes you fucking lose weight because you don't want to feel bad. 0.98

03:39:30.000 And then you feel good because you lost all the weight. 0.99

03:39:32.000 I have to stick up for Jack Kornfield because he is one of the great teachers.

03:39:36.000 I'll stick up for him too.

03:39:37.000 And you would love him.

03:39:38.000 I love him if he's friends with you.

03:39:40.000 I love him.

03:39:41.000 Thank you, Joe.

03:39:41.000 But I do have to stick up for him.

03:39:42.000 But just like an example of how badass this person is...

03:39:46.000 Do you want to move to Texas?

03:39:48.000 No, I can't.

03:39:50.000 I'm not saying...

03:39:50.000 Are you sure?

03:39:52.000 I don't want to be local.

03:39:53.000 I have an idea. 1.00

03:39:56.000 I think you and I together can fix a lot of shit. 0.99

03:39:59.000 What's the plan, man? 0.99

03:40:01.000 You and me do like a weekly podcast.

03:40:04.000 One a week.

03:40:05.000 Joe and Duncan.

03:40:06.000 I love it.

03:40:07.000 Live from Austin.

03:40:07.000 I love it.

03:40:08.000 But it's not gonna happen in Austin.

03:40:10.000 Why not?

03:40:11.000 We'll zoom for a while until you come to your senses.

03:40:13.000 Listen, man.

03:40:14.000 We'll do it off camera.

03:40:15.000 This conversation.

03:40:16.000 I love this conversation, though.

03:40:17.000 Listen, man.

03:40:18.000 I'm not bullshitting.

03:40:20.000 I would do just about anything for you, Joe.

03:40:22.000 I would do just about anything for you.

03:40:24.000 I know you would.

03:40:25.000 I would.

03:40:25.000 Now look, I gotta stick up for this teacher, though, and I'm sorry.

03:40:28.000 We can zoom it.

03:40:29.000 We can zoom it.

03:40:30.000 Hold on.

03:40:30.000 What teacher?

03:40:31.000 Jack Kornfield, Joe.

03:40:33.000 Oh, yeah, the Buddhist guy.

03:40:34.000 Yeah.

03:40:35.000 I love you, man!

03:40:36.000 I love you, too!

03:40:37.000 But you gotta understand, this is like, a person has deeply impacted me, and, like, he was a monk, and I know him as a friend, and, like, he's a monk.

03:40:47.000 Okay.

03:40:48.000 In the sense that he went, here's what's cool about him.

03:40:50.000 He went to, he became a monastic Theravadan Buddhist, and he, like, took a vow of silence for, like, two years.

03:41:00.000 So for two years, he didn't talk.

03:41:02.000 Is it possible he didn't have anything good to say?

03:41:05.000 Oh, no.

03:41:06.000 No, man.

03:41:08.000 Jack Corfield!

03:41:10.000 Look, listen, I really, like, he really, like, I'm sorry.

03:41:14.000 I don't mean to be sentimental about somebody.

03:41:15.000 I'm just joking.

03:41:16.000 I know you're joking.

03:41:17.000 When did he die?

03:41:18.000 He's alive, Joe!

03:41:19.000 I'm sorry, sorry, sorry.

03:41:20.000 You said sentimental.

03:41:21.000 I panicked.

03:41:22.000 I mean, sentimental only in that, like...

03:41:25.000 I wouldn't want to do anything that would like negatively impact like a real- Can we get him on a show?

03:41:29.000 First episode?

03:41:30.000 He would come on your show.

03:41:31.000 You, me, and Jack Kornfield.

03:41:33.000 You would love it.

03:41:34.000 How about that?

03:41:35.000 Our first episode that convinces you to move to Austin, Texas.

03:41:38.000 I would come to Austin, Texas to meet Jack Kornfield.

03:41:41.000 Would you move?

03:41:41.000 No.

03:41:42.000 What if I bought your house?

03:41:43.000 Would you live in it?

03:41:43.000 Joe, I love that you would buy me a house, but I wouldn't move.

03:41:49.000 Isn't that what's cool about us?

03:41:50.000 One of the cool things about us is you could say, I will buy you a house.

03:41:54.000 That's not why I would want to be with you for the house.

03:41:56.000 I know.

03:41:57.000 I know, man.

03:41:58.000 And I understand.

03:41:59.000 But for me, it's like, off camera, I will talk to you about the reason we made the decision.

03:42:03.000 Oh, listen.

03:42:04.000 You made an amazing decision.

03:42:06.000 Your decision's way better than mine.

03:42:08.000 I'm jealous.

03:42:09.000 I don't want to be local.

03:42:11.000 I get it.

03:42:12.000 Let's do a Zoom show.

03:42:14.000 Let's do a Zoom show.

03:42:15.000 Listen, you and I have known each other for so long, we could do both.

03:42:18.000 Or either.

03:42:20.000 Exactly.

03:42:20.000 We could do Zoom shows.

03:42:21.000 That's what I think.

03:42:22.000 We could do live shows.

03:42:23.000 I just think right now, the best thing for the world is not to imagine that you have to be in any given GPS coordinate.

03:42:30.000 I think that...

03:42:32.000 The best thing for the world is to begin to realize we don't need to be tethered to a particular locality.

03:42:39.000 This is the problem.

03:42:41.000 It's a bit of the problem, but it's also in recognizing that it is an actual...

03:42:47.000 It's a thing that you factor into the world that you see.

03:42:52.000 But how relevant is it to day-to-day operations?

03:42:55.000 That's what I'm talking about.

03:42:57.000 To me, the gift of COVID has been...

03:43:01.000 People have begun to realize...

03:43:03.000 Keep your circle small.

03:43:05.000 Google is doing fine.

03:43:07.000 And no one's going to Google to go to work.

03:43:10.000 Twitter is doing fine.

03:43:11.000 No one's going to the Twitter building to work.

03:43:13.000 Netflix...

03:43:14.000 What do you mean?

03:43:14.000 Do they have jobs?

03:43:17.000 Dude, people are all working remotely.

03:43:19.000 No one's going to Netflix.

03:43:20.000 Oh, what you're saying is that...

03:43:22.000 The businesses are doing well, but no one's going to the actual business.

03:43:27.000 They don't have to.

03:43:28.000 Why do they have to?

03:43:29.000 Exactly!

03:43:30.000 Dude, to me, that is the...

03:43:34.000 If you want to start really restructuring society, let's start with a superstition that you need to be in proximity of another person's body. 0.99

03:43:45.000 Goddamn, that kills New York City. 0.99

03:43:47.000 Yeah, it kills LA too. 1.00

03:43:49.000 It kills both of them. 1.00

03:43:50.000 It kills LA. That's why I want you to come to Austin.

03:43:53.000 Dude, I will be at Austin.

03:43:55.000 I'll come to Austin.

03:43:56.000 Duncan, come bring your baby.

03:43:59.000 I can't wait for you to meet Little Forest.

03:44:01.000 He's so brilliant.

03:44:02.000 But my point is, look man, my point is we can't be centralized.

03:44:07.000 Look, you're going to be in Austin.

03:44:08.000 I'm going to be in a certain place.

03:44:10.000 I don't want to say it yet.

03:44:11.000 It's a bunker outside of Nevada.

03:44:13.000 Yeah, I'm going to be in Nevada.

03:44:14.000 Somewhere near Barstow where the Bat's Takeover. 0.97

03:44:16.000 We're gonna fight against centralization so that we don't have to get chained to shitty cities. 0.67

03:44:20.000 Like, that's the whole point is like, look, if anything happens after COVID that's beautiful, it will be that all the commuters say to their bosses, wait a minute, for the last six months, I've been zooming in for these fucking conferences, And your business is doing just as well as it did when I was driving an hour to get there an hour back. 0.52

03:44:40.000 And then the moment that happens, we break the back of addiction to being in a metropolis.

03:44:44.000 Now we have a global society.

03:44:47.000 Now it's not just that you have to have some person who's like living in an Angeleno.

03:44:51.000 It's like you could have someone from any part of the planet.

03:44:55.000 Centralization seems to be the fundamental problem in the sense that It worked.

03:45:00.000 We needed to centralize prior to the internet.

03:45:03.000 But now we don't need to centralize.

03:45:05.000 It's better for everybody if we take into account every idea.

03:45:11.000 It's better for everybody if we take into account all the dumb ideas and smart ideas and let them battle it out.

03:45:20.000 Yeah. 0.87

03:45:21.000 Let's find out who's right.

03:45:22.000 Yeah.

03:45:23.000 And you've got to be real careful with people who think that they're right and the other people are wrong.

03:45:27.000 It's what we were talking about earlier that bums me out the most about the Democratic Convention is that I would just like...

03:45:35.000 forget about whatever you don't like about Trump.

03:45:38.000 Tell me what you're gonna do.

03:45:41.000 Don't tell me how bad the orange man is.

03:45:43.000 Tell me what you're gonna do!

03:45:46.000 How you gonna fix it?

03:45:49.000 How are you going to fix it?

03:45:50.000 What are you going to do?

03:45:52.000 What are you going to do about Flint, Michigan's water? 0.99

03:45:55.000 What are you going to do about the fucking earth is heating up? 0.98

03:46:01.000 What are you going to do about there's no fish? 0.99

03:46:06.000 Where's the fish?

03:46:07.000 What are you going to do?

03:46:10.000 Nobody has an idea. 0.99

03:46:12.000 They just want to talk shit and make sure everybody's trans. 1.00

03:46:15.000 I would rather them talk shit and make sure everyone's trans than be like, what's happening now? 1.00

03:46:23.000 I don't mean that, trans people. 1.00

03:46:24.000 I'm with you.

03:46:26.000 I know.

03:46:26.000 Look, here's what's funny to me about your whole, like, pushback against the trans community.

03:46:31.000 It's not.

03:46:32.000 It's only pushback against trans people competing as females and fighting. 1.00

03:46:36.000 That's it.

03:46:37.000 And other athletics, a little bit, but fighting in a big way.

03:46:41.000 To me, the part of it that's, like, interesting is I know you well enough to know.

03:46:48.000 Prove me wrong here.

03:46:50.000 But if there was a technology...

03:46:52.000 They could turn a guy into a woman? 1.00

03:46:54.000 No, they could not just turn a guy into a woman, which is very funny because right now, that's what we're doing.

03:46:58.000 And it makes sense, because it's like, right now, what we know is men and women, right?

03:47:03.000 So that's where we're at.

03:47:04.000 So right now, as far as our understanding of what can a human be, if you want to break it into a binary, we've got men and women, right?

03:47:11.000 But that's pretty limited to me, you know what I mean?

03:47:14.000 And I get wanting to be a woman.

03:47:17.000 And I think that you, Joe Rogan, If there was a technology that could instantly turn you into a woman, you wouldn't hesitate to turn into a woman. 1.00

03:47:27.000 I'd like to feel a dick inside me. 1.00

03:47:29.000 Yeah, exactly. 1.00

03:47:30.000 That's what I'm saying.

03:47:30.000 As a woman?

03:47:32.000 I don't think it would make me gay.

03:47:34.000 No!

03:47:35.000 Exactly!

03:47:36.000 It doesn't make you gay. 1.00

03:47:37.000 Trust me, as someone who's felt many dicks inside of them, it doesn't make you... 1.00

03:47:40.000 I'm just kidding! 0.99

03:47:41.000 If you could be a woman and actually be attracted to a male for 18 hours, and you're in love...

03:47:50.000 You'd do it in a second.

03:47:51.000 Imagine if you have an Oculus Rift, and they make you go through a bunch of waivers, and they say, Duncan, if you do...

03:48:01.000 Take the next step.

03:48:02.000 Signed! 1.00

03:48:03.000 What happens is you become a woman who actually feels the way a woman feels when she's attracted to a man and a guy with a dick like a battering ram is just gonna send it home. 1.00

03:48:17.000 See what happens. 1.00

03:48:18.000 And you can't wait. 0.94

03:48:19.000 You want to feel him come inside your upper rib cavity. 0.82

03:48:23.000 I want to feel it. 0.97

03:48:25.000 Sign me up.

03:48:27.000 Yeah.

03:48:27.000 Who cares?

03:48:28.000 But some men, the weakest among us, would be scared of that experience.

03:48:34.000 They'd be scared that that experience weakens them and turns them into something that they dismiss.

03:48:41.000 But how hilarious is it?

03:48:43.000 Sorry, Joe.

03:48:44.000 No, it's their own issue.

03:48:46.000 No, it's the experience that literally made them exist on the planet. 1.00

03:48:51.000 They feel like if they were to feel it, it would be something against who they are, which is insanity in the sense of the very feeling of a cock blowing cum. 1.00

03:49:03.000 Inside your body. 1.00

03:49:05.000 You switch spots with your woman. 0.98

03:49:07.000 That's what makes humans.

03:49:07.000 Imagine if the only way a woman was willing to marry you.

03:49:10.000 If you become the wife and she becomes the husband, and you switch consciousness, Duncan, I love you.

03:49:16.000 I love you too, Priscilla.

03:49:18.000 I want to know what it feels like to be you.

03:49:22.000 Yeah.

03:49:22.000 I want to be with you, but I want to be you for four years.

03:49:27.000 Yeah, let's swap identities.

03:49:29.000 Imagine a four-year contract.

03:49:30.000 Yeah.

03:49:32.000 Where all of your secrets get downloaded into your wife's brain. 1.00

03:49:37.000 Let's swap.

03:49:38.000 He likes feet!

03:49:40.000 That's not a secret.

03:49:43.000 Imagine though.

03:49:45.000 No, that's the idea.

03:49:47.000 The point is, right now we're terrestrialized.

03:49:51.000 The reason we're hanging out on planet Earth is not because we decided to be here.

03:49:57.000 We're hanging out on planet Earth because there's not other planets that we could fly to.

03:50:01.000 But even if we could, we haven't figured this one out yet.

03:50:03.000 Slow down.

03:50:05.000 If there were other planets and we could get there, trust me, this is what's funny to me about Lindsey Graham.

03:50:11.000 I love Lindsey Graham. 1.00

03:50:12.000 He's such a fucking asshole, but I feel a weird connection to him. 1.00

03:50:16.000 He's such a fucking asshole. 1.00

03:50:19.000 But Lindsey Graham, I have the feeling that if suddenly there was the ability to travel through space, he would leave the planet within seconds. 1.00

03:50:28.000 He would just be gone.

03:50:30.000 Though Lindsey Graham was like, here's what I think America is! 1.00

03:50:32.000 He's a religious guy?

03:50:33.000 No, he's a politician. 0.98

03:50:35.000 Lindsey Graham is this piggish... 0.99

03:50:37.000 Isn't he religion? 0.99

03:50:38.000 Nah, he's like...

03:50:40.000 Poor Lindsey Graham, man. 1.00

03:50:41.000 He's like...

03:50:42.000 He has a weak chin? 1.00

03:50:44.000 I have a weak fucking chin, man. 1.00

03:50:46.000 No, you don't. 1.00

03:50:47.000 Yeah, dude.

03:50:47.000 Wait till I shave my beard.

03:50:49.000 No, listen, bro.

03:50:50.000 That guy...

03:50:51.000 No, Lindsey Graham... 1.00

03:50:52.000 Look, I know Lindsey Graham. 0.98

03:50:54.000 He, like, got sucked into a dark vortex.

03:50:58.000 He's a sweetheart underneath it all. 0.97

03:50:59.000 And also he's like a gay dude, you know? 0.94

03:51:02.000 He's like a gay dude who like has... 0.99

03:51:03.000 What I'm saying is like... 0.69

03:51:05.000 What is he saying?

03:51:05.000 What?

03:51:06.000 He's a gay dude that has like... 0.98

03:51:07.000 Lindsey Graham causes problems because like... 1.00

03:51:10.000 He's a gay dude that what? 1.00

03:51:12.000 He's a suppressive being that aligns with shit. 1.00

03:51:17.000 Closet. 1.00

03:51:18.000 No, not a closeted thing. 0.96

03:51:19.000 It's not the gay dude is in the part. 0.96

03:51:22.000 It doesn't matter if Lindsey Graham's gay. 1.00

03:51:24.000 That's not what I'm saying.

03:51:25.000 But you brought it up, so it must matter. 0.99

03:51:27.000 No, what I'm saying is because shit came out about him being gay, and then he had to fight it, or there was something I felt bad for him. 0.99

03:51:33.000 In that regard, I feel bad about it. 0.99

03:51:35.000 But don't you think for him, even, it would be if he just said, I'm gay.

03:51:40.000 Yeah, it'd be the best.

03:51:41.000 Or I'm not.

03:51:43.000 Like, that's the argument against these two ideas. 1.00

03:51:47.000 If you could turn into a woman and get fucked like you just said, would you be gay? 1.00

03:51:54.000 That's a good question, bro. 1.00

03:51:56.000 No. 1.00

03:51:56.000 You would just be a woman who got fucked. 1.00

03:51:59.000 But somehow, if you've decided to centralize on your masculine identity and someone fucks you, now you're gay. 1.00

03:52:06.000 The whole conceptualization of gayness and straightness is just monkey talk. 0.98

03:52:10.000 Is the problem the word itself?

03:52:12.000 The problem is the binary.

03:52:14.000 The definition?

03:52:16.000 Gay, straight? 0.98

03:52:17.000 It's a binary, dude.

03:52:19.000 It's like, look, I don't know. 0.99

03:52:22.000 Whatever the fuck it is that you think is limiting your ability to experience pleasure on the earth is Satan. 0.98

03:52:28.000 And it's like, if that thing is telling you that you're a dude and this is the only way you can feel joy, but simultaneously you're hanging out with a guy who's the same gender as you and you're falling in love with him, and then you're pretending you're not because some devil voice in your mind is telling you, 0.99

03:52:45.000 that's Satan, man.

03:52:46.000 That's evil. 1.00

03:52:47.000 That's fucking evil. 1.00

03:52:48.000 It's dark. 1.00

03:52:49.000 And I'm not deriding Lindsey Graham's sexual proclivities. 0.99

03:52:53.000 How do you know he's not actively gay?

03:52:55.000 I don't know that.

03:52:57.000 Why are you shaming him?

03:52:58.000 I'm not shaming Lindsey Graham.

03:52:59.000 I feel like you are.

03:53:00.000 No, I'm not.

03:53:01.000 I feel like it would be nice if you admit your privilege.

03:53:04.000 I hope Lindsey Graham is listening to this, because I'm not insulting you, my friend.

03:53:08.000 You can hear from my voice that I'm not insulting you.

03:53:12.000 I'm just saying...

03:53:12.000 Hello, darkness, my old friend.

03:53:14.000 No, Joe, I'm telling you, if Lindsey Graham could fly off the planet, he would.

03:53:19.000 That's what I think. 1.00

03:53:19.000 Would he fly off the planet with a man's mouth on his penis? 1.00

03:53:22.000 Who wouldn't? 1.00

03:53:27.000 I would do that in a second!

03:53:28.000 I don't care who it is!

03:53:31.000 I don't care if it was what fueled the spaceship or didn't.

03:53:34.000 That would be amazing!

03:53:36.000 Why wouldn't you do that?

03:53:41.000 How awesome would that be?

03:53:42.000 Imagine if it was the mountain from Game of Thrones.

03:53:45.000 That guy's blowing you as you fly through space.

03:53:50.000 And your orgasm extends to eternity. 0.99

03:53:54.000 Yeah, the whole, like, gay, straight thing really falls apart. 0.99

03:53:58.000 What are you playing?

03:53:58.000 Pig Floyd, I wish you were here?

03:54:00.000 No, it's the sound of silence.

03:54:00.000 I was trying to work it in there, but I can't find the cue.

03:54:03.000 But the gay, straight thing falls apart if we stop being terrestrial. 0.94

03:54:06.000 Like, the moment you're not on the planet anymore, it's all planetary-based memes, man. 0.96

03:54:11.000 It's like, the moment we're released from the gravity well, all the stuff that seems so important to dumbasses, which is like, what? 1.00

03:54:21.000 You would put your mouth on a penis? 1.00

03:54:23.000 You must be crazy. 1.00

03:54:25.000 Imagine if it felt amazing. 1.00

03:54:27.000 Imagine like, man, I've never blow a fucking guy. 1.00

03:54:30.000 And you get that dick in your mouth. 1.00

03:54:32.000 And the moment that sperm hits your tongue, it's like pop rocks. 1.00

03:54:36.000 Yeah. 0.95

03:54:36.000 Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop. 0.95

03:54:37.000 And your brain goes...

03:54:40.000 You and I, man, we will suckle on a... 0.90

03:54:43.000 We will suckle on a mucus thing that's like a... 1.00

03:54:47.000 The vagina? 1.00

03:54:49.000 We'll do that all... 1.00

03:54:50.000 The baby shoot.

03:54:51.000 We pride ourselves on it.

03:54:52.000 The end of a water park slide.

03:54:55.000 That's what I love so much about... 0.93

03:54:58.000 Christina Pazitzky's Instagram, she does these like fucking hilarious TikTok clips that she recovers from TikTok. 1.00

03:55:06.000 And there's a whole genre of TikTok of these creepy fucking pervs who are like showing how they lick pussy. 1.00

03:55:13.000 And like the whole TikTok is based on them like going... 1.00

03:55:17.000 It's so fucked up, but it's like a guy will, in the masculine sense, will go down on a girl, yet the concept of having a dick in your mouth is considered to be, like, fucked up. 1.00

03:55:31.000 Like, you must be, like, a complete, like, something about you is weak. 1.00

03:55:36.000 You know, and I think we're gonna have to contend with that.

03:55:38.000 What's this?

03:55:39.000 That's the dude!

03:55:40.000 What's he doing?

03:55:41.000 He does, like, how, like, he, like, watch.

03:55:44.000 You gotta watch it, man.

03:55:45.000 What's he doing? 1.00

03:55:47.000 This guy does, like, eating pussy TikToks. 1.00

03:55:51.000 That's what he's doing? 1.00

03:55:52.000 Yeah, watch, watch, just watch.

03:55:54.000 This one doesn't do it.

03:55:55.000 He, like, eases into it. 0.96

03:55:58.000 Her, by the way, her Instagram, the TikTok she does, like, she should do a whole show based on her, like, she, like, curates the most fucked up TikToks you've ever seen. 0.57

03:56:08.000 Isn't that important, like, TikTok, whether it's TikTok or Instagram or any of these things? 0.84

03:56:14.000 Isn't that important?

03:56:15.000 Uh, just How did I do that?

03:56:18.000 It kind of is, right?

03:56:19.000 Yeah. 0.97

03:56:22.000 Lowering the boundaries, like dropping down the boundaries for people to be able to enter into the world of expressing whatever weirdo idea they have or video of them doing backflips onto a fucking whale, whatever they're doing. 0.92

03:56:37.000 Yeah. 0.88

03:56:40.000 I don't like TikTok in the sense that my wife isn't.

03:56:43.000 I've never even opened it.

03:56:44.000 She's into TikTok, and I don't like it because she's always looking at TikTok.

03:56:47.000 And then I'll be like, really?

03:56:48.000 You're looking at TikTok?

03:56:50.000 And she'll be like, you're on Twitter all day long.

03:56:53.000 You should get off Twitter.

03:56:54.000 You should read this book. 0.56

03:56:55.000 I hate Twitter.

03:56:56.000 This book, Irresistible, it's a mind blower, man.

03:56:59.000 It really is.

03:57:00.000 Because it lets you realize that as much as we're at each other's throats right now, I don't know how much of it is our fault.

03:57:09.000 And I think we could have been a lot better off if someone decided, instead of trying to make money, that they would recognize that this strategy of Whether it's social media, likes, or Twitter, you know,

03:57:24.000 Twitter, Facebook, or whether it's showing you the things you get angry about and you comment on Facebook or YouTube, like, whatever we're doing, like, ultimately, we're changing the path of the way people think.

03:57:37.000 We're way more malleable than we like to think we are.

03:57:40.000 Way more.

03:57:41.000 Right.

03:57:42.000 And I think people that have a voice, whether it's you or I or Ari or Bert or Tom or anybody who has a podcast in particular because...

03:57:52.000 If you have a podcast, at the very least, no one's telling you what you can't talk about.

03:57:58.000 Duncan, I love that segment.

03:58:01.000 But when you're talking about people not conforming and trying to figure themselves out, people are thinking you're non-binary or somehow or another you're not woke.

03:58:14.000 Sorry.

03:58:16.000 I'll repeat what I said.

03:58:18.000 I'm sorry.

03:58:18.000 I'll revise.

03:58:19.000 We're in the middle of a storm, Duncan.

03:58:21.000 Yeah.

03:58:22.000 Well, the most important thing, I think, in this storm, and it's easy to forget, is that you and I and everybody we run across, I have yet to meet somebody who's a real monster, man.

03:58:35.000 There's a few, but even them, they just need hugs.

03:58:38.000 They're also very unique.

03:58:40.000 When you run across, it's very unique.

03:58:43.000 Anytime I feel like this is where I'm attuned to this.

03:58:48.000 Anytime I get the sense someone's wanting me not to express myself, that's where I get really locked in. 1.00

03:58:55.000 And I get the whole anti-woke thing because nobody wants some fucking liberal Baptist piece of shit to tell them how to be. 0.99

03:59:04.000 But, you know, man, the moment on my Instagram I did a Black Lives Matter thing, That's the only time anybody told me to shut up. 0.99

03:59:15.000 No one told me to shut up before that, but the moment I did a thing that was in alignment with Black Lives Matter, there was all of a sudden this weird similarity of people hitting me up, being like, you fucking woke me up. 0.87

03:59:29.000 There was a lot of blowback from that.

03:59:33.000 When you say a lot, how many?

03:59:37.000 Enough that like I noticed it right, but if you tune in At not a huge percent part like 30 messages.

03:59:45.000 How many messages?

03:59:46.000 No, not 30 just enough where I really I'm gonna say like five fifteen fifteen enough where like I realize how many Instagram followers Do you have I don't remember dude, I can look it up right now like not 200,000 or something.

04:00:02.000 I don't know a lot of people man.

04:00:04.000 I No, but I know what you're saying, but I realized that my thinking regarding being even remotely a political activist was being shaped by my fear that a tiny percentage of my audience would reject me.

04:00:22.000 And that's what I'm saying. 0.99

04:00:23.000 I was letting my ship get steered, not by my own intuition, or not by my own sense of like, fuck man, that fucking George Floyd video, that's unforgivable. 1.00

04:00:35.000 That shit's fucked up. 1.00

04:00:36.000 It is, but it's both. 1.00

04:00:38.000 It's unforgivable.

04:00:40.000 Any man that would do that to another man, that man needs help.

04:00:45.000 I bet he didn't think he was going to kill that guy, but he tortured that guy for 8 minutes and 46 seconds.

04:00:52.000 It's like, that guy needs a DMT trip.

04:00:57.000 He needs something.

04:00:58.000 He needs to recognize who he is.

04:01:00.000 It's also, Duncan, I think we're asking people to do things they're not really qualified to do.

04:01:08.000 They don't have the tools to handle it.

04:01:10.000 They don't have the infrastructure to handle the load of pressure that comes in.

04:01:16.000 I just feel like all these people that...

04:01:18.000 And then, right now, we're so anti-cop, it's over the top.

04:01:24.000 Well, look, man, what I love about you is that you're not afraid to say a thing like that.

04:01:29.000 And I think if we're going to move forward right now...

04:01:32.000 We need cops. 0.81

04:01:33.000 No, if we're going to move forward, what we need is not just cops.

04:01:37.000 We need compassion.

04:01:39.000 Yes.

04:01:39.000 If we're going to move forward, what we need is it's like, look, man, you're...

04:01:44.000 You're right.

04:01:45.000 This country was completely founded on human trafficking. 1.00

04:01:49.000 You're right that your idea that if you have a particular complexion in this country, shit is immediately against you. 0.99

04:02:01.000 You're completely right about that. 0.98

04:02:03.000 The thing is, this is the problem, and I think this is an important question for everybody to ask themselves, is how do you act when you're right?

04:02:14.000 That's how you can really tell a person.

04:02:16.000 You know what I think?

04:02:17.000 Honestly, I think we are looking for change the way we see change in ourself.

04:02:24.000 Like, we see a potential for change in ourself.

04:02:26.000 We see something wrong.

04:02:27.000 We go, I gotta correct that.

04:02:29.000 And then we think that society can do that, too.

04:02:31.000 But society is like a battleship.

04:02:33.000 It's like a 500-meter-long steel structure that has to...

04:02:41.000 Yeah.

04:02:42.000 Planes land on it.

04:02:43.000 That's it.

04:02:44.000 Yeah, that's it.

04:02:46.000 That's a good description.

04:02:47.000 It's got to turn.

04:02:48.000 Yeah, that's it. 1.00

04:02:49.000 And then people are like, Fuck you! 1.00

04:02:51.000 We don't like people from fucking Muslim countries. 1.00

04:02:58.000 Fuck you, trans women are real women. 1.00

04:03:01.000 Yeah, right. 1.00

04:03:02.000 And it's this battle to try to navigate this enormous metal structure through the fucking ocean. 0.99

04:03:08.000 Right. 0.99

04:03:09.000 That's where we're at.

04:03:11.000 That's why you gotta do a podcast with me, Duncan.

04:03:14.000 Anytime.

04:03:14.000 I'll do anything for you, man.

04:03:15.000 We gotta work this out.

04:03:16.000 We can work it out.

04:03:17.000 I mean, the answer is...

04:03:18.000 Jamie, I'm not wrong, right?

04:03:21.000 No, but...

04:03:22.000 The answer is compassion, Joe.

04:03:24.000 It's not twisted.

04:03:25.000 No, this is what I'm thinking.

04:03:27.000 You and I have a very unique frequency.

04:03:31.000 Yeah.

04:03:31.000 Let's do it!

04:03:32.000 This is why it's important. 0.99

04:03:34.000 Because when you and I get together, and I firmly believe you and I can do this every goddamn week. 0.98

04:03:40.000 I love it. 0.95

04:03:40.000 Especially if we only saw each other once a week. 0.95

04:03:42.000 It's the best.

04:03:42.000 I'll fly you in.

04:03:44.000 I'll fly in.

04:03:45.000 You can come to Austin once a week.

04:03:45.000 We can Zoom.

04:03:46.000 We can Zoom.

04:03:48.000 We can do whatever.

04:03:48.000 I'll fly to North Carolina.

04:03:50.000 Shh.

04:03:51.000 I'm not going there!

04:03:52.000 I'm going to Colorado, man!

04:03:54.000 I meant Chuba!

04:03:56.000 Yeah, man.

04:03:56.000 Like, I love it, Joe.

04:03:58.000 I mean, to me, like, you know, that's why I think so great about the fact that you got to be the person that you are, that you got to be the spotlight, got to be on you as it is, and the reason it's on you, and the reason I take such...

04:04:12.000 Not much offends me, man, but when people start attacking you, I have to fight against my offense because I know you.

04:04:22.000 And so when people are fucking at arms against you, I feel really depressed because I know you.

04:04:27.000 And you are one of the most progressive people I've ever met. 0.99

04:04:32.000 And so when people start falling upon you because you have fucking nerds like Ben Shapiro, Which, by the way, you shouldn't have that guy on anymore! 0.98

04:04:43.000 Why? 1.00

04:04:43.000 He's a dork, come on. 1.00

04:04:44.000 But come on, those conversations are important. 0.98

04:04:47.000 I think what's beautiful about what you're doing is you're opening...

04:04:50.000 I would not open up the...

04:04:51.000 By the way, Ben Shapiro, underneath it all, I know that you and I would probably have fun. 1.00

04:04:56.000 But I know that right now, where you're at in your incarnation, you're a fucking dork! 1.00

04:05:00.000 You know what I mean? 1.00

04:05:01.000 Like, he's a dork! 1.00

04:05:02.000 He's a dork. 1.00

04:05:03.000 But what's so confusing... 0.99

04:05:04.000 He's a nice guy!

04:05:05.000 But that's what's confusing about him.

04:05:06.000 I like him a lot.

04:05:08.000 You look at him and he's all beating up what's-her-face about the thing and that embarrassing thing.

04:05:14.000 What?

04:05:15.000 The music video. 0.63

04:05:17.000 He's like, and they were doing fornication. 1.00

04:05:19.000 Did you see me and Ali Makovsky talking about wet-ass pussy? 1.00

04:05:23.000 Oh, God. 1.00

04:05:24.000 Like, that thing Shapiro's doing, it's so embarrassing, Joe.

04:05:27.000 I get it.

04:05:28.000 And, like, that dude is, like, an embarrassment, but I don't think what people admit when they look at Ben Shapiro is, like, there's a piece of you that's like, I'd have fun with him.

04:05:36.000 Like, it'd be fun to drink with him.

04:05:37.000 He's probably cool, but he's, like, right now...

04:05:39.000 I don't think he drinks, but he's a nice guy.

04:05:42.000 Whatever it is he is.

04:05:43.000 He's a good person.

04:05:44.000 I'm not bullshitting.

04:05:45.000 Look, again, I think our job right now is not to alienate.

04:05:48.000 We have to, like, involve.

04:05:50.000 That's why I have him on.

04:05:52.000 That's why I know you're doing it, Joe.

04:05:55.000 I'm telling you right now, Ben Shapiro is a nice man.

04:05:58.000 He's a nice man.

04:05:59.000 I see him, I hug him every time I see him.

04:06:01.000 And I don't hug him to be fake.

04:06:03.000 I hug him because I genuinely love that guy.

04:06:05.000 He's a nice guy.

04:06:06.000 Look, I think some of the stuff he's propagating in his philosophies is legitimately deranged.

04:06:13.000 Bro, he's wearing an outfit.

04:06:16.000 It's a costume.

04:06:17.000 It's not...

04:06:18.000 I mean, he...

04:06:21.000 Ben Shapiro could never take off the yarmulke, shave his head, tattoo his chest with an eagle, wear a bikini.

04:06:30.000 He's got an outfit.

04:06:32.000 But it's not his fault.

04:06:33.000 I'm telling you, we all come from a different spot.

04:06:37.000 If life is a race, it's not like everybody's on the same starting line.

04:06:42.000 People on starting lines are like a mile behind you.

04:06:45.000 They're so far away.

04:06:46.000 They're all different.

04:06:48.000 And here's the thing.

04:06:50.000 Even if people are wrong about many things or even – I'll explain this better.

04:06:56.000 Even if you disagree with the way people feel about so many different things – It doesn't mean you can't be their friend.

04:07:04.000 It doesn't.

04:07:05.000 And I'm telling you, we got it wrong, man.

04:07:08.000 That's so sweet.

04:07:08.000 Here's what's important.

04:07:09.000 What's important is whoever that person is, they gotta be sincere.

04:07:12.000 Now.

04:07:14.000 As soon as you feel like someone's a grifter, you've got to cast them out.

04:07:19.000 Right.

04:07:19.000 You've got to cast them out because they've got to figure that out on their own and they've got to apologize.

04:07:24.000 That's cool, man.

04:07:25.000 Listen, you can be wrong, but you have to be honest.

04:07:28.000 And if you're just bullshitting, then I can't hang out with you. 0.97

04:07:32.000 Ben Shapiro's not bullshitting. 0.99

04:07:35.000 I don't think he's bullshitting.

04:07:36.000 I just think he's a little antiquated in his ideas.

04:07:39.000 Look, man, the whole Ben Shapiro thing, of all your guesses...

04:07:44.000 He's a great guy, man.

04:07:46.000 If you met him, if you and I and him went to a steak dinner, we'd have a great conversation.

04:07:51.000 I hung out with him at the...

04:07:53.000 What's that steakhouse?

04:07:55.000 The BOA? BOA in Hollywood down from the store on Sunset?

04:08:00.000 I had a great time with him.

04:08:01.000 He's a good man.

04:08:02.000 I don't care.

04:08:03.000 I genuinely like him a lot.

04:08:05.000 When he texts me, Ben Shapiro texts me, I look at my phone, I'm like, Ben Shapiro, I like that guy.

04:08:09.000 I like him.

04:08:10.000 Look, as far as I'm concerned, if you're going to create what I think could be created by humanity, We have to create the engine, not of rejection, but of acceptance, meaning that if you've got a charismatic Finn Shapiro avatar in the video game,

04:08:27.000 in the simulation that we're in, there's a way to reabsorb him into reality that isn't like the way people currently see him.

04:08:35.000 He's willing to relinquish his ideology.

04:08:38.000 And he has a very strict religious ideology.

04:08:41.000 Yeah, he's stuck in this little thing.

04:08:43.000 But I think that's helped him.

04:08:46.000 That little thing.

04:08:47.000 Look, if you figure out a way to do something that helps you pass most of the people that you're competing against, but ultimately hinders you against the people who learn your lessons plus other lessons and aren't hampered by ideology,

04:09:04.000 and they pass you.

04:09:07.000 There's a moment we have to figure out when you're gonna let go.

04:09:10.000 He seems to have a very clear mind.

04:09:12.000 That's what's cool about him.

04:09:13.000 He seems to have a very insightful mind.

04:09:15.000 I like that.

04:09:16.000 I just feel like something about him, it smacks of the Nazi intellectuals. 0.71

04:09:21.000 Yes, it does, but he's Jewish.

04:09:23.000 And here's the thing I love.

04:09:24.000 When people get mad at me that I talk to them, I'm like, listen, just listen to what we're saying.

04:09:30.000 Listen, he's not a bad guy.

04:09:31.000 You might not agree with him, but me and him are having really good conversations about why I feel like you can't tell an 18-year-old kid just pull your pants up and don't shoot anybody.

04:09:43.000 We're having these really nuanced conversations and he's allowing me because he knows I like him.

04:09:50.000 So you're like the Bohemian Grove.

04:09:52.000 No, he knows I like him.

04:09:54.000 Ben Shapiro and I don't agree on many things, but he knows if I see him, I go, what's up, man?

04:10:00.000 How you doing?

04:10:00.000 I hug him, and it's genuine.

04:10:02.000 I really care about him.

04:10:04.000 That's the whole point.

04:10:05.000 That's the whole point.

04:10:06.000 So if he and I are sitting right here, and we talk about stuff, he knows that if I don't agree with him, it doesn't change my feelings about whether or not I'll hug him or I love him.

04:10:17.000 That's it.

04:10:18.000 Yes.

04:10:19.000 That's the problem we're all facing.

04:10:20.000 We're all facing this problem where we identify with ideas.

04:10:24.000 Whereas, I think we can just do our best to make good with where we stand right now as a human, and when we encounter other humans, let's take ideas and put them in front of us.

04:10:39.000 And let's cross our arms and let's go over these ideas without any attachment.

04:10:43.000 That's where it gets hard because most of us don't have enough personal satisfaction and our own accomplishments to relinquish this idea that our ideas are not ours.

04:10:55.000 That our ideas are just a mathematical problem. 0.98

04:10:58.000 It's a fucking Rubik's Cube. 1.00

04:11:00.000 It's a fucking game of Clue. 1.00

04:11:02.000 Like, who knows who did it? 1.00

04:11:04.000 Is it Charlotte in the fucking library with a rope? 1.00

04:11:08.000 We don't know! 0.99

04:11:09.000 So this thing that we're doing as people today Is we're scared.

04:11:16.000 And one of the things that happen when people are scared is they pull back.

04:11:19.000 You pull back, you put up fences, you wall off, you protect your tribe, you decide what you can say, what you can't say, and decide who's the enemy and who's good and who's bad, and everybody walls off!

04:11:36.000 My thoughts are that's a trap and that is just something that we've been involved with forever from the beginning of time from single-celled organisms to Small mammals to human beings.

04:11:49.000 We've been involved in this weird trap of competing against each other in the wrong way Competing against each other in a way where ultimately somebody gets victimized.

04:11:58.000 I think The best competition is keeping the other competition alive, competing against each other while helping each other.

04:12:08.000 And everybody gets by.

04:12:10.000 Everybody gets better.

04:12:11.000 And even people who are not doing well, you tell them why they're not doing well, that will force you to do better.

04:12:17.000 Right. 0.99

04:12:18.000 All of the people that are trying to take your position, if there's a ladder, you say, this is why you fucked up. 0.99

04:12:24.000 And then you'll do better because they'll do better. 0.99

04:12:27.000 Right.

04:12:27.000 And then everybody does better.

04:12:28.000 Yeah.

04:12:28.000 There's no stagnation.

04:12:29.000 I get it.

04:12:30.000 It's just like you're in a brutal position.

04:12:34.000 You're in a really brutal position.

04:12:36.000 And no matter what, I don't see how you can resist it.

04:12:39.000 The problem with your position is you have this powerful voice.

04:12:44.000 That's the problem.

04:12:46.000 You're a signal booster. 0.99

04:12:48.000 I also got a NASA suit and I can hold my piss for four hours, son. 0.99

04:12:52.000 How have you not pissed?! 0.99

04:12:54.000 But to me, the difficult situation you're in is like, you get Ben Shapiro on, you signal boost that, whatever that is.

04:13:04.000 I don't know what he is.

04:13:05.000 By the way- He's not a bad guy.

04:13:07.000 Ben Shapiro, I'm not trying to attack you. 1.00

04:13:09.000 Whatever the thing you did with attacking the music video- What ass pussy? 1.00

04:13:14.000 That was an embarrassment. 1.00

04:13:16.000 That was a mess.

04:13:18.000 I get it.

04:13:18.000 It was really sex negative.

04:13:20.000 It was so stupid. 1.00

04:13:21.000 He seemed like such a nerd, a dork. 1.00

04:13:24.000 Like and also anybody who's gonna like do that you like feel like they negate whatever their philosophical ideas by attacking the thing, who gives a fuck? 1.00

04:13:33.000 However, he's doing the exact same thing that Trump does when he gets attention.

04:13:37.000 He's saying something about something that's culturally relevant and he's taking a contrary position and he's generating likes.

04:13:45.000 He's generating interest.

04:13:47.000 Right, he's like a he's a he's a salesperson for negativity.

04:13:51.000 If I was his best friend If Ben and I were sitting around, he's like, you think you're supposed to us? 0.98

04:13:56.000 I'd be like, okay, yeah, you probably should, because ultimately, people are going to fuck with you, but my position is it's better if you have vulnerabilities. 1.00

04:14:10.000 If there's something you've done that's really stupid, it's probably better for you when you shit on things. 1.00

04:14:15.000 And I think that's a good argument for coming out against wet-ass pussy. 1.00

04:14:20.000 What's wrong with wet-ass pussy, by the way? 1.00

04:14:23.000 Nothing. 1.00

04:14:23.000 But a guy like Ben Shapiro, he shouldn't be right too many times. 1.00

04:14:28.000 Part of his charm...

04:14:32.000 It's his failure! 1.00

04:14:33.000 Part of his charm is occasionally he's got to say some shit that only a fucking dude with a yarmulke says. 1.00

04:14:41.000 It's not that he's a bad person. 0.99

04:14:42.000 I love him.

04:14:43.000 What do you mean a dude with a yarmulke?

04:14:44.000 There's a lot of Jewish.

04:14:45.000 Jari's Jewish! 0.99

04:14:46.000 Listen, listen.

04:14:46.000 I love Ari, but he doesn't wear a yarmulke.

04:14:48.000 Okay?

04:14:49.000 You're saying the yarmulke means fundamentalism.

04:14:51.000 You don't have to wear it!

04:14:53.000 We're in space!

04:14:55.000 We're flying!

04:14:57.000 You've gone from rejecting...

04:14:58.000 Like this.

04:14:59.000 Here's us as a golf ball.

04:15:03.000 Flying through the universe.

04:15:05.000 Impossible.

04:15:07.000 Look, man. 1.00

04:15:07.000 I don't care about fucking Ben Shapiro. 1.00

04:15:10.000 I don't care. 0.99

04:15:11.000 Thank God you're the first episode on Spotify.

04:15:13.000 I don't care about...

04:15:14.000 What are we, four hours in?

04:15:17.000 Who cares?

04:15:18.000 Plus.

04:15:18.000 I don't care about Ben Shapiro.

04:15:21.000 I don't care.

04:15:21.000 He's a nice guy.

04:15:23.000 Who cares?

04:15:23.000 No, he cares.

04:15:25.000 Listen, if I hug Ben Shapiro, I really hug him.

04:15:28.000 I love that guy.

04:15:29.000 He's a sweetie, I'm sure.

04:15:31.000 He's a sweetie.

04:15:32.000 When I meet him, he's a nice guy.

04:15:34.000 Look, man, it doesn't matter.

04:15:35.000 Here's a deeper point, man.

04:15:37.000 And I don't mean to do this every time I'm on.

04:15:39.000 But...

04:15:40.000 You have... 1.00

04:15:42.000 Such a crazy power that if you're not careful, folks from deep, dark wells of perspective are gonna infiltrate your shit. 1.00

04:15:57.000 Dude, have you watched that great documentary on the white Aryan folks? 1.00

04:16:02.000 Man, it's fucked up. 0.99

04:16:03.000 Why you gotta go there? 0.99

04:16:05.000 Give me that lighter.

04:16:07.000 Here you go.

04:16:08.000 Like, yeah, you look at like...

04:16:12.000 These people are very organized, man.

04:16:13.000 It's like they're organized is what I'm saying.

04:16:16.000 And again, I'm not saying Ben Shapiro is this person.

04:16:18.000 He wears a yarmulke.

04:16:19.000 He's Jewish.

04:16:20.000 I don't know much about him.

04:16:21.000 I don't care.

04:16:22.000 Listen to me.

04:16:23.000 Listen to me.

04:16:23.000 All those people that are organized, they come hang out with us.

04:16:29.000 Give me a hug.

04:16:30.000 You don't want to give them a hug?

04:16:32.000 Relax.

04:16:33.000 Why?

04:16:33.000 Just relax.

04:16:34.000 All those people are just people, man.

04:16:35.000 Like a white supremacist? 0.99

04:16:36.000 They're lost. 0.96

04:16:38.000 Imagine if you gave a white supremacist five MEO DMT and let them sit on a couch, one of them brown suede couches. 0.67

04:16:49.000 They'd take three big hits and then as the first one, as they're exhaling... 0.95

04:16:55.000 Yeah.

04:17:06.000 Yeah.

04:17:06.000 And they get sucked into the center of the universe and they realize there is no center because there is no boundaries.

04:17:14.000 It's all connected.

04:17:15.000 That's crazy.

04:17:16.000 You're in a soup.

04:17:17.000 You're in an infinite soup of ideas and biology and thoughts and prayers and love and hope and happiness and jealousy.

04:17:26.000 Right. 0.68

04:17:27.000 Anal sex, and it's all together with cartoons and pop music and cheeseburgers. 1.00

04:17:39.000 Just a bunch of different experiences all fucking stitched together in some sort of macrame. 0.99

04:17:46.000 You're saying there's a redemptive possibility. 0.95

04:17:49.000 And then the aliens land.

04:17:52.000 Yeah.

04:17:53.000 Look, man, this is the way I see it.

04:17:55.000 I don't know, man. 1.00

04:17:56.000 Who gives a fuck? 0.99

04:17:56.000 Like, really, it's like, you know, the reality of it is, is like, we are in a very bizarre period in time, which is that you and I, we became friends on the phone having these same conversations, and now you say a thing that flies in the face of the particular, 0.99

04:18:16.000 like, default reality of our time, and you start trending on Twitter. 0.97

04:18:22.000 The way I know you right now is like you trending on Twitter where I'm like, what the fuck happened?

04:18:29.000 But the joke's on them because I don't read Twitter. 0.80

04:18:31.000 You don't go on Twitter at all.

04:18:33.000 I don't read it.

04:18:33.000 I post things.

04:18:34.000 Like today I posted Ali Letterman made some masks.

04:18:37.000 I post her masks.

04:18:39.000 Joe, it's just weird because it's like you're like a...

04:18:41.000 But it's not me.

04:18:43.000 It's what they think I am.

04:18:45.000 It's who they decide I am.

04:18:47.000 Yeah, but you have to watch out because people are going to like try to exploit you. 0.98

04:18:51.000 That's the main thing is like people recognizing what you are, who have political agendas, will infiltrate your shit and then start blowing out their radioactivity into the world, right? 0.98

04:19:01.000 That's a fear. 1.00

04:19:02.000 Like radium, like face rot and shit. 0.99

04:19:05.000 Yeah, yeah, exactly. 0.98

04:19:06.000 Like they'll get in there and then like all of a sudden like you accidentally start exhaling shit that's like...

04:19:14.000 You don't agree. 0.96

04:19:15.000 I know you don't agree with Ben Shapiro.

04:19:17.000 Listen, it's not that I don't agree with Ben Shapiro.

04:19:20.000 And I definitely don't on many things.

04:19:22.000 And he and I talked about it.

04:19:24.000 It's that I don't want to abandon him.

04:19:27.000 Oh, that's cool.

04:19:29.000 I don't think he's worthy of abandonment because I think he's a good person.

04:19:34.000 Right.

04:19:35.000 And I think many of the things he says, he says because he's rewarded for saying controversial things on the internet and many times make sense in a logical way if you don't take into account all the different situations that lead to a person becoming who they are in 2020. Right.

04:19:53.000 Slavery and Jim Crow laws and all these different things we all have to deal with.

04:19:57.000 But I think he's a good person.

04:19:59.000 I really do.

04:20:00.000 I think many times the things we say, we're half defensive and half promotional.

04:20:07.000 You're saying things because you think that people are going to react in a certain way.

04:20:11.000 You don't necessarily mean it.

04:20:13.000 And you also say things because you've seen the contrary to that poorly worded and you decide you don't agree with that until you want to counter it.

04:20:23.000 But I think the problem is in ideologies.

04:20:27.000 More than anything, if I'm really being objective, I always feel like our problem is purely in ideologies because we just get committed to one side or the other and ideas to one side.

04:20:41.000 You're right or you're wrong.

04:20:42.000 And I think if we could just divorce ourselves from ideas and divorce ourselves from all ideologies and just look at something like honest, like you come to me and I come to you and I go, Hey man, what's up?

04:20:54.000 I go, what are your intentions?

04:20:56.000 My intention is to live a harmonious life with my neighbors.

04:21:00.000 And I said, mine as well.

04:21:02.000 Okay, good, beautiful.

04:21:03.000 And you hug each other, and you go, what do we have to do about taxes? 0.69

04:21:07.000 Man, if we lived in a community where I felt like, hey, if I pay more in taxes, people will have their kids in a better school, and the water will be purer, and there'll be less crime, I would fucking 100% sign up for that. 0.80

04:21:23.000 Of course. 0.98

04:21:23.000 But I don't think the people that are taking that fucking thing and running with it know what they're doing. 0.98

04:21:30.000 That's right. 0.99

04:21:31.000 That's the problem.

04:21:31.000 You believe in the idea of democracy, you just don't believe in the organizational facility that's like administering democracy.

04:21:41.000 I've been to the red line of human beings.

04:21:45.000 I know where people fall apart.

04:21:47.000 I know the red line.

04:21:48.000 I know when the RPMs hit.

04:21:50.000 I know when people bitch out. 1.00

04:21:52.000 And I know I'm not going to bitch out.

04:21:54.000 And if you're going to bitch out, I know if you're bitching out and you're also making You're making laws? 1.00

04:22:02.000 What are you saying? 0.93

04:22:04.000 What are you doing?

04:22:05.000 What's going on?

04:22:06.000 Who are you?

04:22:07.000 Why are you deciding what people do?

04:22:10.000 We shouldn't have any figureheads.

04:22:12.000 It's dangerous.

04:22:13.000 Alpha chimps are dangerous.

04:22:15.000 Take it from me, a person with a big platform.

04:22:19.000 You shouldn't listen to me.

04:22:20.000 You shouldn't listen to you.

04:22:22.000 You shouldn't listen to Bert Kreischer.

04:22:23.000 You shouldn't listen to Tom Segura, Ari Saffir, or Joey Diaz.

04:22:28.000 Name all the people you love to listen to.

04:22:31.000 Sam Harris, don't listen to them.

04:22:34.000 Meaning, listen to their show.

04:22:39.000 Apply to whatever they say, your own objective opinion.

04:22:43.000 But how weird is it that people will focus that you have Ben Shapiro on this podcast, but they don't focus that you have Bernie Sanders on?

04:22:52.000 How weird is it that- But they do.

04:22:53.000 They do focus.

04:22:54.000 But what I'm saying is people in the left will say, you're a monster that you would have Ben Shapiro on, and they completely forget That you gave one of the great potential socialist presidents of our time a platform that you supported.

04:23:10.000 They forget that.

04:23:11.000 And Andrew Yang and Tulsi Goward.

04:23:13.000 Those are my favorite people.

04:23:15.000 That's the part that drives me nuts.

04:23:16.000 Why do they forget that? 0.89

04:23:17.000 Because I'm a savage.

04:23:21.000 That's why.

04:23:22.000 What do you mean?

04:23:23.000 I'm a savage. 1.00

04:23:24.000 I'm a fucking cage fighting commentator. 1.00

04:23:26.000 I commentate for UFC. I do stand-up comedy. 0.99

04:23:29.000 I do wild comedy.

04:23:31.000 I'm a wild person.

04:23:32.000 It's a different thing.

04:23:33.000 I understand.

04:23:35.000 It's just that we have to stop trying to push people down in order to push ourselves ahead.

04:23:43.000 And if we just all look at it like...

04:23:45.000 Look, there's things about...

04:23:49.000 All sorts of aspects of society that I don't agree with, that smart people disagree with.

04:23:55.000 I don't know if they're right.

04:23:57.000 I don't know if I'm right.

04:23:58.000 I don't know.

04:23:59.000 I would like to talk forever to people that are vegans.

04:24:03.000 My friend John Joseph, he's the singer of the Cro-Mags. 0.99

04:24:08.000 He's a fucking interesting dude, man. 0.96

04:24:11.000 You know, and he's been a vegan forever. 0.99

04:24:17.000 And he's like a super fucking strong guy. 0.96

04:24:20.000 Like mentally, physically, does triathlons. 0.98

04:24:24.000 I want people to think different than me.

04:24:28.000 I want them to. 0.99

04:24:29.000 I want bad motherfuckers to have completely Separate ideas of how the world should or shouldn't work, what is wrong or isn't wrong, what's right or isn't wrong, what's privilege, what's bullshit. 0.99

04:24:44.000 I want everybody to come to the table clean. 0.99

04:24:47.000 I want everybody to come to the table warm.

04:24:50.000 I want everybody to hug.

04:24:52.000 I really do.

04:24:53.000 And I think we're all scared.

04:24:55.000 And I think it fucks up everybody.

04:24:57.000 And if everybody who wants progress Doesn't want people to feel good about running into each other and talking things through.

04:25:04.000 We're going into this thing with the wrong energy.

04:25:06.000 The right energy is going into this thing going, listen, I didn't ask to be born.

04:25:12.000 You didn't either.

04:25:14.000 Here we are, 2020, trying to figure the world out. 1.00

04:25:18.000 But let's just admit, The idea of wrestling between gay and straight, black and white, male and female, those are so dumb. 0.99

04:25:29.000 I don't want to do that. 0.99

04:25:31.000 I want to talk to honest and dishonest.

04:25:36.000 I want to talk to secure and insecure.

04:25:39.000 I want to talk to loving and hateful.

04:25:42.000 I want to hug people that need it.

04:25:44.000 I want to figure out a way where we can get through this in a better state than we were five years ago, ten years ago. 0.99

04:25:51.000 Let's get through this with food and water and realize we didn't need a fucking Amex platinum card! 0.98

04:25:59.000 Hey! 1.00

04:26:01.000 I don't want a fucking... 1.00

04:26:02.000 I don't want it! 1.00

04:26:05.000 I don't want Google Home!

04:26:07.000 You're gonna be president.

04:26:08.000 No, I don't want to be president.

04:26:10.000 No, it doesn't matter.

04:26:10.000 I don't want any president.

04:26:12.000 That's what I want.

04:26:13.000 I want no president.

04:26:15.000 They're gonna run this in your anti-campaign, but you're gonna...

04:26:18.000 I could see it happening, man.

04:26:20.000 We should postpone the election and try to find a better way to do this. 0.99

04:26:23.000 No, do the fucking election. 0.99

04:26:24.000 Get Biden in there. 1.00

04:26:25.000 Get a non-lunatic in there.

04:26:26.000 What we need is romantic tension between a 24-year-old, like, super...

04:26:36.000 A super liberal, super attractive woman, and like a 32-year-old Navy SEAL, who's also married, and no one cheats on anybody, but they have this sexual tension, and they keep it together, and they work their way through veganism,

04:26:53.000 and... 0.98

04:26:58.000 I'm trying to fucking fix the world, Duncan. 0.96

04:27:00.000 I'm trying to tell you that all the things that we see, pros and cons, pluses and minuses... 0.97

04:27:08.000 Yeah, man. 0.99

04:27:10.000 I'm just trying to figure out like we got to the election and suddenly it's this erotic romance between this 24 year old- That's so much better than a fucking guy with fake hair and some dead man weekend at Bernie's with a cop shoving her hand up his ass and walking him to the aisle. 0.99

04:27:28.000 Here's the thing that I don't understand. 0.99

04:27:29.000 In sports, somebody in any fucking sport, if they're not doing great that night, The coach pulls them off and puts someone better in. 0.95

04:27:40.000 Here's the thing, Duncan Trussell. 0.98

04:27:41.000 No one wants that spot.

04:27:44.000 Their replacement?

04:27:46.000 No one.

04:27:47.000 Why?

04:27:47.000 Who wants to be president?

04:27:49.000 I would love to be president. 1.00

04:28:01.000 The fucking, the fucking, the fucking look in your face. 1.00

04:28:08.000 Oh my god, Jamie. 1.00

04:28:17.000 I don't want to go through an election, but I would like the...

04:28:20.000 Listen, elections are so archaic. 0.99

04:28:22.000 That's fucking wood stoves. 1.00

04:28:24.000 Yeah. 0.99

04:28:25.000 But I would love to be president.

04:28:26.000 Being president would be so fun.

04:28:27.000 Would it be?

04:28:28.000 Here's the best part.

04:28:29.000 You could exonerate all your friends.

04:28:31.000 Immediate. 0.99

04:28:32.000 That is the most ridiculous thing about being president. 0.99

04:28:35.000 You can... 0.99

04:28:36.000 The best.

04:28:37.000 You can just decide.

04:28:38.000 You're out.

04:28:39.000 I'm going to party!

04:28:40.000 You're out.

04:28:41.000 By the way...

04:28:41.000 He's a bad guy, but he's a good guy.

04:28:44.000 And here's a really important thing.

04:28:46.000 The Trump administration just let out one of the great LSD chemists of our time.

04:28:51.000 Who's that?

04:28:51.000 I can't remember his name.

04:28:52.000 It's so sad if you look it up.

04:28:53.000 Good.

04:28:53.000 Don't say it.

04:28:54.000 Don't say it.

04:28:55.000 No, you should say it.

04:28:55.000 He already blew up that guy's spot that was throwing cigarettes on the ground in Utah.

04:28:59.000 No, look.

04:29:00.000 His name deserves to be spoken.

04:29:03.000 Do you know who contacted me recently?

04:29:05.000 Who?

04:29:06.000 Do you remember the Neuro Soup story?

04:29:08.000 William Leonard Picard.

04:29:10.000 Do you remember, uh, I'm so drunk.

04:29:13.000 Me too.

04:29:13.000 Do you remember NeuroSoup?

04:29:15.000 Yeah, yeah.

04:29:16.000 She was a girl who was on YouTube, and her and I, I went back with her.

04:29:20.000 This is an interesting thing. 1.00

04:29:21.000 She had a detailed account of how she put DMT up her asshole. 1.00

04:29:25.000 She dated William Leonard Picard. 1.00

04:29:27.000 Yeah, yeah.

04:29:28.000 That's the guy that had the LSD lab in the middle of the bunker.

04:29:30.000 And the DMT accelerator pedal.

04:29:32.000 He contacted me.

04:29:34.000 Okay.

04:29:35.000 From prison?

04:29:36.000 I don't know.

04:29:37.000 I just got an email.

04:29:39.000 And, um...

04:29:40.000 It's not my main account, but I was like, hmm, maybe that's real.

04:29:45.000 But that lady, she had a whole YouTube series about different ways she took drugs. 1.00

04:29:50.000 And one of them was she took DMT up her asshole. 1.00

04:29:54.000 It was a bad trip. 1.00

04:29:56.000 She had a bad trip.

04:29:58.000 Yeah, but part of me was like, that girl. 1.00

04:30:06.000 DMT up the ass, that's a rare human. 1.00

04:30:09.000 That's a great night. 1.00

04:30:10.000 A rare human looks at that DMT nugget.

04:30:13.000 That little cocoa pup.

04:30:14.000 Whatever it is.

04:30:18.000 Honeycomb Cheerios.

04:30:20.000 I want that in my life.

04:30:22.000 I want to be around someone who's like...

04:30:24.000 That's so free. 1.00

04:30:25.000 Put it up your asshole? 1.00

04:30:27.000 Would you even consider it? 1.00

04:30:29.000 Yes.

04:30:29.000 Really?

04:30:30.000 I would put DMT up my ass. 1.00

04:30:31.000 I've thought about it after I heard about it. 1.00

04:30:33.000 It's a good way to let the universe know you give up.

04:30:49.000 It's the end!

04:30:50.000 It's the video game.

04:30:51.000 It's the part of the video game where you're like done.

04:30:54.000 Dude, come move to Texas, please. 1.00

04:30:55.000 North Carolina's bullshit. 1.00

04:30:57.000 Where the fuck you're moving to? 1.00

04:30:58.000 Why do we have to be localized, Joe? 1.00

04:30:59.000 You don't want to live in Tennessee.

04:31:01.000 Hey! 0.99

04:31:02.000 No, look, we don't have to be locked into any place.

04:31:05.000 If I bought you a house...

04:31:07.000 We don't have to be locked into a place, Joe.

04:31:09.000 I appreciate you.

04:31:10.000 And by the way, I know you.

04:31:12.000 I want to fix things.

04:31:13.000 I know that you buy houses for your friends.

04:31:16.000 I want to fix things.

04:31:17.000 So sweet that you would say that.

04:31:18.000 But look, we don't have to be spatially disconnected.

04:31:20.000 I think we can fix things, Duncan.

04:31:23.000 Look, man, you're already fixing things.

04:31:26.000 I think you can help me.

04:31:27.000 I will help you in any way I can.

04:31:29.000 I'm better with you.

04:31:29.000 I'm better with you than without you.

04:31:32.000 Listen, man, I'm better with you than without you.

04:31:34.000 But that's real.

04:31:34.000 That's real.

04:31:35.000 It's true.

04:31:35.000 You and I both talked about this, not just on podcasts, I think, but even on phone calls.

04:31:41.000 But when we do podcasts, I feel like you bring me to a place that I don't really get without you.

04:31:47.000 Yeah, we're friends.

04:31:48.000 I really feel like that because I've known you so long.

04:31:51.000 I remember when you had this breakup.

04:31:55.000 And we lived together, and you called me up and you're like, I don't know what to do. 0.99

04:31:57.000 I'm like, fuck, man, come live with me! 0.99

04:31:59.000 I was so happy. 1.00

04:32:01.000 I was one of the comics that you evolved.

04:32:04.000 And also, in that moment where I was living with you, it wasn't like...

04:32:10.000 Some kind of like National Lampoon vacation thing.

04:32:13.000 You were like really serious with me and you were not serious all the time.

04:32:17.000 We had a few like really serious talks and in those serious talks you like helped me realize that like I had to stop being so flippant with my life and it was really good and you weren't fucking around and it was cool and it was very sweet and I'll never forget it man.

04:32:35.000 Well you know what I wanted to say to you?

04:32:38.000 This will...

04:32:41.000 When you see someone who is at a bump in the road, many things can happen, right?

04:32:47.000 And for you, I wanted you to know that you can most certainly get upset along the way, or you can be almost I'm almost immune to all the bumps in the road.

04:33:02.000 It's really how you decide.

04:33:05.000 And if you decide you're this fucking Peter Pan character and just like float through this, there's ways that you're lucky and ways that other people that live in Afghanistan and the Congo will never understand. 0.96

04:33:19.000 You weren't letting me do that. 0.98

04:33:23.000 But you and I, when we were hanging out together, I was like, I remember the moment you called me, there wasn't even a half a second between you saying, I was like, yay, Duncan's going to live with me!

04:33:34.000 That's sweet!

04:33:35.000 Yay! 0.99

04:33:36.000 That's sweet, man.

04:33:37.000 And I wanted you to get in the tank. 0.75

04:33:39.000 And I got, yeah, all that's great, man.

04:33:41.000 I love it.

04:33:42.000 And like, I'm not trying to, like, your perception of it may even be different from mine, but like, one thing that happened, I have a few memories of that incredible gift that you gave me.

04:33:54.000 One of the memories is, riding up to your house, I don't even know how you got into my car, that you would be in my Mini Cooper, which was red at the time.

04:34:03.000 I remember that.

04:34:04.000 We're driving up to your house.

04:34:05.000 I came to visit you.

04:34:06.000 We're listening to Elliot Smith.

04:34:08.000 I'm playing Elliot Smith. 1.00

04:34:09.000 Yes, he's talking about fucking... 1.00

04:34:12.000 Morose things. 1.00

04:34:13.000 And I've been listening to that nonstop.

04:34:17.000 So we're riding up this hill to your mansion and listening to Elliot Smith in my Mini Cooper.

04:34:23.000 So this is before your podcast, before you become like what you are now.

04:34:29.000 Just imagine folks listening, riding in a Mini Cooper with Joe...

04:34:35.000 Joe Rogan and our cherry red Mini Cooper trying to play Elliott Smith for him because it's really been moving you.

04:34:42.000 I'm not playing it for you because like any other reason than this is what I've been tuned into for like a long time.

04:34:48.000 And so we're riding up this hill to your mansion and I remember you look at me in this way that only like real friends can do this.

04:34:57.000 And you look at me and you go, you have to stop listening to this.

04:35:00.000 You were like, you can't listen to this anymore.

04:35:02.000 Like, this is terrible.

04:35:04.000 This is like hurting you.

04:35:05.000 And it wasn't from a judgmental place or a place of musical brilliance.

04:35:10.000 It was a friend being like, dude, You are depressed?

04:35:13.000 That guy gives out a vibration.

04:35:15.000 He was incredibly depressed.

04:35:18.000 And incredibly talented.

04:35:20.000 A terrible nexus.

04:35:21.000 So good, so good.

04:35:22.000 And he was a trap.

04:35:24.000 It's a trap.

04:35:25.000 It is a trap.

04:35:26.000 It's like you can squeeze out some really super positive juice and then to the left of your body you're filled with cancer.

04:35:34.000 That's the problem with people that...

04:35:38.000 There's so many different things where people are depressed and morose and they're talking about really dark things.

04:35:44.000 But dude, it wasn't just you.

04:35:46.000 So I get to your house, I'm in this mansion all of a sudden. 0.99

04:35:49.000 That was when you had a fucking piranha tank. 0.99

04:35:52.000 Do you remember that? 1.00

04:35:52.000 You had piranhas. 1.00

04:35:54.000 I remember.

04:35:54.000 So all of a sudden I'm in a mansion where there's a piranha tank and Eddie Bravo I remember because I was going up to hide smoking because I was addicted at the time.

04:36:04.000 Cigarettes?

04:36:05.000 Yeah.

04:36:06.000 And I remember I was sneaking up to smoke.

04:36:09.000 And at some point, Eddie Bravo, I'd gone up this hill to hide smoking.

04:36:14.000 And Eddie Bravo walks up the hill to me and is imitating smoking to me, making fun of me for being addicted to cigarettes.

04:36:26.000 But Joe, you know what happened?

04:36:29.000 This is where I really go back and I think, Eddie Bravo. 0.98

04:36:33.000 In that moment, I'm like, what a prick. 1.00

04:36:35.000 Don't tell me not to fucking smoke. 1.00

04:36:37.000 Cut to me sitting in front of a doctor being like, well, you have cancer in your balls. 1.00

04:36:42.000 And I remember referring back to that moment where he was like, Stop smoking. 0.99

04:36:48.000 Yeah.

04:36:49.000 You know what I mean?

04:36:50.000 Which was cool.

04:36:51.000 It was like, there's so many in those moments.

04:36:54.000 Well, there's a thing where you can do, where you can protect people temporarily from their emotions, but you won't protect them from the consequences of their actions.

04:37:03.000 That you see that maybe they don't.

04:37:05.000 And I think we're all responsible for our friends' blind spots.

04:37:09.000 And when we see blind spots, we go, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

04:37:13.000 There's only so much you can do, though.

04:37:14.000 There's only so much you can do.

04:37:16.000 Eddie Bravo could have like turned into a dragon and then like stop smoking.

04:37:20.000 Cigarettes are creepy, right?

04:37:21.000 Nicotine's a very addictive drug, man.

04:37:23.000 It gets you.

04:37:24.000 It gets you in a weird way.

04:37:26.000 But he was legitimately trying to get me to stop smoking.

04:37:30.000 Eddie Bravo's a good man.

04:37:31.000 That was a sweet moment. 0.99

04:37:32.000 Like when I look back, I always, like when I look back pre-cancer, I always think of that moment as like, man, you thought that guy was such a cunt. 1.00

04:37:41.000 Like you thought he was such a cunt. 1.00

04:37:42.000 Because you didn't want to quit that habit. 1.00

04:37:43.000 Yes!

04:37:46.000 But you look back like he wanted me to do better. 1.00

04:37:49.000 He didn't want me to get one of my balls chopped. 0.98

04:37:51.000 I got lucky because it didn't spread through my whole body and I didn't die. 0.98

04:37:57.000 We have two choices right now.

04:37:58.000 I can pee my pants or I can run to the bathroom and we stop it and then we come back.

04:38:04.000 No, don't stop it.

04:38:05.000 I've never had it where you go to the bathroom.

04:38:07.000 Talk to Jamie.

04:38:08.000 We're five hours in?

04:38:10.000 How many hours?

04:38:10.000 It doesn't matter.

04:38:11.000 I've got to pee so bad.

04:38:12.000 Be right back.

04:38:13.000 This is amazing.

04:38:13.000 Talk to Jamie.

04:38:14.000 I've been dying for this moment.

04:38:15.000 Jamie, just so you know, through the years of us doing Rogan, I usually am the one who has to go to pee.

04:38:22.000 Oh my God.

04:38:23.000 But in this moment, here I am with the thing happening and, you know, What does he do in this spot when the guest leaves?

04:38:38.000 Does he pull something up?

04:38:39.000 He just yaps.

04:38:43.000 Well, gang, subscribe to my Patreon, forward slash DTFH. We have a Tuesday, we have a meditation.

04:38:52.000 Wednesdays, we're doing a Dune book club.

04:38:54.000 It's amazing.

04:38:55.000 The book Dune by Frank Herbert is incredible.

04:38:58.000 Fridays, we have a family gathering.

04:39:00.000 It's just us hanging out, but join us there.

04:39:05.000 You know, the truth is it is a simulation, you know, and we told you that before you linked into the thing and we told you it would wipe your memory and that you would feel like you are helpless in the sense that the thing you are right now,

04:39:22.000 you don't know what The power that you wield.

04:39:26.000 So you chose that, just so you know.

04:39:29.000 And we said that in this moment, we would do a thing where we alerted you of the fact that you had been, you had intentionally decided to dive into a simulation, making you limited.

04:39:41.000 You're very powerful.

04:39:42.000 You're Thor.

04:39:44.000 In the human world that you're in right now, you're actually Thor.

04:39:49.000 You're a powerful Norse god that has gotten sucked into a very temporary magic spell that isn't even that powerful compared to the powers in the world you come from.

04:40:02.000 But right now you have become convinced that you are a limited Identity in the mortal realm, which you requested, by the way.

04:40:13.000 You said, I want to be an insurance agent, real estate agent, school teacher, psychologist, fireman, cop.

04:40:23.000 I wanted to be a pilot, somebody who was a flight attendant, someone who worked in a museum, a teacher, somebody who was a historian, a failed writer, a failed comedian, and you became this temporary thing,

04:40:41.000 but the truth is you're a god and you're confused.

04:40:44.000 Joe, welcome back!

04:40:45.000 Oh my god, I peed so hard.

04:40:48.000 It was amazing.

04:40:50.000 I don't want to do it!

04:40:52.000 I just want everyone to know, if you're like, no one should have this amount of influence.

04:41:00.000 No one.

04:41:01.000 No one should be able to say things that affect politics and social ideas.

04:41:06.000 You're right.

04:41:08.000 I agree with you.

04:41:10.000 Right.

04:41:11.000 I didn't want to do this.

04:41:12.000 Right.

04:41:13.000 This is a weird thing.

04:41:15.000 Yeah.

04:41:16.000 But I'm doing my best.

04:41:17.000 What are you going to do?

04:41:18.000 Stop?

04:41:19.000 I'm not stopping, no.

04:41:22.000 You're gonna retire?

04:41:23.000 Because, like, no matter what you do...

04:41:24.000 It's like jujitsu.

04:41:26.000 You can't go for a choke just right away.

04:41:28.000 You can't just dive on the choke.

04:41:30.000 Yeah.

04:41:31.000 You gotta slowly cook the person.

04:41:33.000 Slowly.

04:41:34.000 Work through positions.

04:41:35.000 What's the choke here?

04:41:37.000 Rear naked. 0.55

04:41:38.000 You get the mounts. 0.93

04:41:39.000 You let them buck you off.

04:41:41.000 You get half guard.

04:41:42.000 You hold on.

04:41:43.000 You escape.

04:41:44.000 Side control.

04:41:45.000 You try to mount again.

04:41:46.000 They turn over.

04:41:47.000 You get their back.

04:41:48.000 Hooks in.

04:41:50.000 Squeeze.

04:41:51.000 Jesus Christ.

04:41:53.000 Takes time.

04:41:54.000 All things take time.

04:41:55.000 Don't you worry, though, like, what if, like, and again, like, we've been going on so many hours now, so now at this point I'm just pulling...

04:42:04.000 How much time has this podcast gone on?

04:42:08.000 Four minutes and 40 seconds.

04:42:12.000 But don't you worry...

04:42:15.000 Four hours and 40 minutes.

04:42:17.000 Joe, don't you worry, though.

04:42:18.000 Spotify's first episode.

04:42:19.000 We're right.

04:42:20.000 I was right!

04:42:21.000 I knew it!

04:42:22.000 You knew it.

04:42:22.000 I'm like, Duncan has to be number one.

04:42:24.000 Did you know you had to be number one?

04:42:26.000 When you invited me on, I tried not to think about it because I was so flattered.

04:42:30.000 You have to be.

04:42:31.000 I felt darkly flattered.

04:42:33.000 And then I went on your subreddit.

04:42:36.000 I saw the votes for who would be on the number one thing.

04:42:43.000 I wasn't even listed, Joe! 1.00

04:42:45.000 Those people are fools. 1.00

04:42:46.000 No, they're not. 1.00

04:42:47.000 Listen to me, they're fools. 1.00

04:42:49.000 I know what I'm doing. 1.00

04:42:50.000 Look at this fucking knife, dude! 1.00

04:42:53.000 Tuck more custom knives, shout out. 1.00

04:42:55.000 But like, not to like, I do feel like a kind of- Those people are fools. 1.00

04:42:59.000 They're wrong. 0.68

04:42:59.000 Listen, you have helped me in many steps of the way because you and I, as friends, You know, we came from different backgrounds, but we're both very compassionate and very interested in exploring alternative ideas. 0.68

04:43:14.000 Both of us. 0.95

04:43:16.000 You and I have had so many conversations where you said something to me and I went, hmm, damn, maybe, huh? 0.91

04:43:22.000 And I've had to reconsider the way I was focusing in on something.

04:43:27.000 And because I respect you, and this is something I've said of Ari as well, and Joey, and even Eddie Bravo, and Jamie, and all the people that I'm around, if you say something to me, I consider it like I'm thinking of it in a different way.

04:43:44.000 Like if you say, I don't think that's a good idea because of this, I go, Huh.

04:43:48.000 Okay.

04:43:49.000 Tell me why.

04:43:50.000 Right.

04:43:51.000 And I'll let it go.

04:43:53.000 I don't want to be...

04:43:55.000 I don't want to cling on to that early idea, man.

04:43:57.000 And I think that's half our problem.

04:43:59.000 That's half our problem.

04:44:01.000 You know, I've always felt like a weird sense of guilt about Eddie Bravo, man.

04:44:04.000 Because, like, Eddie Bravo...

04:44:08.000 Mommy, did you hear that?

04:44:09.000 Yeah.

04:44:09.000 Yeah, thanks, dude.

04:44:10.000 I always felt like a weirds is a guillivet.

04:44:12.000 Jamie said yeah!

04:44:13.000 I thought he was gonna cut his finger off last time he did it.

04:44:15.000 I felt like a weirds is a guillivet Eddie Bravo.

04:44:18.000 And I don't agree with all his conspiratorial ideas.

04:44:21.000 No, I don't either, but neither does he.

04:44:25.000 But dude, this is an important thing.

04:44:27.000 This is an important thing. 1.00

04:44:29.000 Not only did he tell me to quit smoking, and then I got one of my fucking balls. 1.00

04:44:33.000 And I got one of my balls chopped off. 1.00

04:44:36.000 Well, he was right about that, but... 0.99

04:44:37.000 Right, but I want to tell you another thing he said.

04:44:39.000 He said another...

04:44:40.000 Cheers, brother.

04:44:41.000 He said another thing to me.

04:44:43.000 I do feel like it's worth mentioning.

04:44:45.000 I always felt a weird sense of guilt, because I think I judged him harshly, and it makes me feel like a dum-dum. 0.91

04:44:51.000 Because he's like a jujitsu master.

04:44:54.000 You know, he's my master.

04:44:56.000 Yeah.

04:44:57.000 If someone said, who's your master?

04:44:58.000 I'd say, first, John Jock Machado, second, Eddie Bravo.

04:45:01.000 One of my best friends is my master.

04:45:03.000 So I always felt, I always had this trick, at the very least, a trickling sense of like, man, I think you were wrong about your judgment there.

04:45:12.000 It's dangerous.

04:45:13.000 Yeah, it's dangerous. 0.67

04:45:13.000 Because he can kill you. 0.67

04:45:15.000 Yeah. 0.99

04:45:16.000 Well, that, also, talking to him.

04:45:17.000 That's the problem.

04:45:18.000 Anytime I've been talking to him, I'm always a little bit, like, nervous.

04:45:21.000 At any moment, I could die.

04:45:23.000 It's like a pet snake. 1.00

04:45:24.000 Yeah, like, what if at some moment you do, like, go insane and decide to kill me? 0.95

04:45:29.000 I won't.

04:45:29.000 Do you know who I feel like that around?

04:45:31.000 Who?

04:45:31.000 Joey.

04:45:32.000 Joey Diaz?

04:45:33.000 Yes. 0.97

04:45:33.000 What, do you think he would kill you? 0.97

04:45:35.000 No, no, no, no. 0.64

04:45:36.000 But he's so wild. 0.99

04:45:38.000 He's so crazy. 0.86

04:45:39.000 He's like a bear. 0.99

04:45:40.000 I want to keep feeding.

04:45:43.000 Joey Diaz is like, you know... 0.77

04:45:45.000 He's the goat.

04:45:47.000 You know that, right? 0.89

04:45:48.000 Well, I do.

04:45:49.000 He's the greatest of all time.

04:45:51.000 There's no one who's ever been funnier.

04:45:53.000 I've seen Joey Diaz hit frequencies.

04:45:56.000 I've never seen anybody else hit.

04:45:58.000 Yeah, he was hanging out in Colorado around Shambhala, which is the place my meditation teacher's teacher was teaching.

04:46:10.000 In Boulder!

04:46:10.000 Yeah, man.

04:46:14.000 So we encountered some beings there that were really advanced and he actually digested some of that stuff.

04:46:22.000 Joey Diaz is wild. 0.97

04:46:25.000 Remember, to me, one of the aspects of this particular moment in the Kali Yuga that's so fucked up. 0.98

04:46:34.000 This is Kali Yuga, right? 0.96

04:46:36.000 It has to be.

04:46:37.000 Well, Kali Yuga, like a lot of people... 0.90

04:46:38.000 Explain?

04:46:39.000 So Kali Yuga, it's the age we're in right now.

04:46:42.000 Explain the Yugas. 0.90

04:46:42.000 So the Yugas are like vast spans of time, and we're considered to be in the Kali Yuga. 0.90

04:46:49.000 But this is like something that was actually...

04:46:52.000 Actually predicted yeah several years ago.

04:46:55.000 Yeah, we'll hunt like thousands of years in terms of like people recognizing this right now is Kali Yuga.

04:47:01.000 There's there's are there's like you know differences in what part of the Kali Yuga we're in but there's no difference in that we're in the Kali Yuga.

04:47:08.000 Explain the Yugas. 0.90

04:47:09.000 I'm sorry.

04:47:10.000 The Yugas are a period of time that one of the ways to like But if they get represented, it's like, imagine a dove flying through the sky with a silk scarf and the beak, and the tip of the scarf brushes against the peak of the Himalayas.

04:47:29.000 So the amount of time it takes for one of those peaks to get pushed down to a valley, that could be considered a yuga.

04:47:37.000 In Hinduism, it's a period of time, and people argue about that length of time.

04:47:41.000 It's negotiable.

04:47:42.000 It's negotiable, but there are certain symptoms for each yuga.

04:47:46.000 And so the Kali Yuga, the symptoms are you can't remember very well. 0.99

04:47:55.000 Your memory's all fucked up. 1.00

04:47:56.000 You're impetuous. 1.00

04:47:57.000 You're fast in your decisions.

04:47:59.000 You're easily addicted.

04:48:01.000 You know, if you look back at the...

04:48:03.000 In the history of Hinduism, the Vedas were originally sung.

04:48:07.000 So they were memorized and people would sing them.

04:48:11.000 They would sing them and they weren't written down.

04:48:14.000 Writing is considered a degradation.

04:48:17.000 It was written down because they heard it.

04:48:23.000 It was written down later down the line.

04:48:26.000 The idea was you didn't need to write anything down because you would memorize.

04:48:30.000 I remember when I was a kid In high school, my friend Brian Cattrall, going through all the numbers he'd memorized.

04:48:38.000 And it was so many.

04:48:39.000 He had so many phone numbers memorized because we didn't have phones.

04:48:43.000 So you had to memorize numbers or write them down in a little pad.

04:48:46.000 So what we consider to be technology is really a crutch to make up for our idiocy in the age of the Kali Yuga, which is what we're in right now.

04:48:54.000 And a lot of people get confused because they think Kali means Kali, the goddess of destruction.

04:49:00.000 How many Yugas? 0.99

04:49:02.000 I think four.

04:49:03.000 Three or four.

04:49:04.000 Do you know?

04:49:05.000 I don't know the answer.

04:49:07.000 I only know the...

04:49:08.000 Jamie's like, this is an eight-hour podcast.

04:49:13.000 You have to give him overtime pay.

04:49:15.000 I've been trying to figure out, too, not that I want to end this at all, but this being our first Spotify podcast...

04:49:20.000 It kind of has to be, too.

04:49:21.000 We have other things.

04:49:23.000 I don't know how they're going to deal with this file and whatnot.

04:49:25.000 Well...

04:49:28.000 We're right now at five hours into the podcast, right?

04:49:32.000 How many hours?

04:49:33.000 I don't want to do it!

04:49:34.000 Yeah, five hours.

04:49:35.000 We should just make it two, two and a half hour podcasts.

04:49:38.000 I feel like I've been stopping it.

04:49:40.000 Shouldn't we?

04:49:40.000 I don't know how to...

04:49:41.000 I don't want it to end.

04:49:42.000 Spotify, I know what I'm doing.

04:49:45.000 This is why I brought Ducky on.

04:49:46.000 I'm going to miss you, man.

04:49:47.000 That's the main thing.

04:49:48.000 You're not going to miss me.

04:49:49.000 I'm going to be around you.

04:49:50.000 Come on, dude.

04:49:51.000 You don't want to live in South Dakota.

04:49:53.000 I'm sorry.

04:49:54.000 I forgot.

04:49:56.000 South Dakota, my sweet home.

04:49:58.000 You know what? 1.00

04:49:59.000 Fuck Arizona. 1.00

04:50:00.000 Sorry. 1.00

04:50:01.000 I'm going to South Dakota and I can't wait.

04:50:03.000 But dude, it's rough to come in here and see people pack.

04:50:06.000 Because look, man, here's the main thing.

04:50:08.000 It's like, we're not packing.

04:50:10.000 Hires on the storm.

04:50:11.000 Yeah, dude, but we're not packing ourselves up because of some like Tonner S. Thompson thing.

04:50:18.000 We're packing ourselves up because the country we were born into has fallen into the throes of a really dark period induced by a once-in-a-hundred-year pandemic.

04:50:28.000 That's what I'm saying.

04:50:29.000 But why do you want to live in a place where none of us are living?

04:50:33.000 Why not think about this?

04:50:34.000 I know why I don't want to live in Austin.

04:50:36.000 I know that.

04:50:37.000 Why?

04:50:38.000 Why?

04:50:39.000 Well, because I'll tell you why, Joe.

04:50:41.000 If you really want another real dark reason, because you announced it.

04:50:46.000 You know what I mean?

04:50:47.000 Had you not announced it, it might be a different story.

04:50:50.000 But you and Elon Musk.

04:50:52.000 It was going to get out anyway.

04:50:54.000 Yeah, but Elon's coming to Austin.

04:50:55.000 You're coming to Austin.

04:50:56.000 Yeah, we're talking about it.

04:50:57.000 I know.

04:50:58.000 So welcome, like Austin.

04:51:00.000 Tom Segura.

04:51:01.000 That's Silicon Valley.

04:51:03.000 No.

04:51:03.000 So, yeah.

04:51:04.000 Yeah, dude.

04:51:05.000 Yeah, I'm sorry, but that is what you have created by your...

04:51:08.000 I'm not sure.

04:51:09.000 I do.

04:51:09.000 You know, Matthew Conway has a great idea.

04:51:12.000 What?

04:51:12.000 He wants to make a primer for people moving to Austin, where you say, hey, don't turn what you escaped from into the place you're going to.

04:51:23.000 Oh, shit. 0.99

04:51:23.000 That's brilliant. 0.99

04:51:24.000 Yeah.

04:51:25.000 Don't turn the place you're escaping to...

04:51:28.000 Exactly like where you fled.

04:51:30.000 Yeah, man.

04:51:31.000 Yeah, I get it.

04:51:32.000 Brilliant.

04:51:32.000 And he's right.

04:51:33.000 And this is what we were talking about earlier.

04:51:37.000 We were talking about defunding the police and defunding ICE and all this nonsense that people are like, let's just figure out a way to be nice to each other.

04:51:48.000 Yeah, man.

04:51:49.000 I agree, and I don't think that's based on any locality.

04:51:52.000 Now, the Austin thing, like offline, I'll tell you my decision.

04:51:56.000 Offline?

04:51:57.000 I did think about it, Joe.

04:51:58.000 I thought about it.

04:51:59.000 What turned you off to it?

04:52:02.000 Well, you know, my feeling is...

04:52:05.000 I'm stammering because it's like telling you why it would reveal where I'm headed, and I don't mean to be all magical about that, but the main thing...

04:52:14.000 Listen, let me say, where you are headed...

04:52:19.000 Is a great choice.

04:52:20.000 Thank you, brother.

04:52:21.000 I've been. 0.93

04:52:21.000 And you fit in there like a pee in the pot. 0.93

04:52:23.000 I might wind up being there. 0.55

04:52:25.000 You might, baby!

04:52:26.000 I'm ready to keep moving.

04:52:27.000 Listen, this is the thing.

04:52:29.000 I think about the Spotify deal and just the idea of what a podcast is moving forward.

04:52:34.000 I want you to be involved.

04:52:36.000 It's why I wanted you to be number one.

04:52:39.000 Thank you, Joe.

04:52:39.000 Legitimately, you and I have some of my favorite conversations.

04:52:43.000 Thanks, brother.

04:52:43.000 I love you, man.

04:52:45.000 I love you, too. 0.98

04:52:45.000 We've been friends for a long fucking time. 0.98

04:52:47.000 Yeah, man. 0.96

04:52:48.000 I'll be involved with anything you're involved in.

04:52:49.000 Let's do it.

04:52:52.000 Let's have fun.

04:52:53.000 By the way, not to go back to Eddie Bravo apologetics, but I didn't finish my point back then.

04:52:57.000 And I think it's an important point to make. 0.99

04:53:00.000 He said to me something that was so fucking weird when he said and this was on top of him taking on a missionary stance with my inhalation of tobacco smoke so by then I was already like over a little defensive I was defensive and I didn't I was like I was too dumb at that time to like recognize like shit man this guy's got a fucking like He's a jiu-jitsu master. 0.98

04:53:23.000 So what he's saying is not coming from a place of someone who hasn't worked really hard at a particular... 0.99

04:53:29.000 He's saying, just don't kill your body.

04:53:31.000 Yeah.

04:53:32.000 But one thing he said to me, which is...

04:53:34.000 I always think back to it, because I remember when he said, I was like, you sycophant.

04:53:39.000 And what he said to me was exactly what's happening to you right now!

04:53:45.000 What'd he say?

04:53:46.000 He said...

04:53:47.000 You have no idea what's going to happen to him.

04:53:50.000 He's going to be like, he's going to be so huge.

04:53:55.000 And I remember him saying it.

04:53:56.000 This was fear factor.

04:53:58.000 It was not like a safe assessment, man.

04:54:00.000 It was like, when he said it to me, it felt culty. 0.99

04:54:04.000 It felt fucked up. 0.99

04:54:06.000 It felt like, it felt crazy. 0.99

04:54:09.000 And I remember him saying it to me and being like, man, I didn't say it because I was afraid of him.

04:54:20.000 We're good. 0.99

04:54:25.000 I'm thinking like, you're fucking crazy that you would think that. 0.99

04:54:29.000 But you know, it's weird that he's right. 0.99

04:54:31.000 You know, that's what's weird about it.

04:54:32.000 It's like, this is your first episode on Spotify.

04:54:35.000 And it's crazy, man, because like, I get, and I'm honored, deeply honored that you invited me on.

04:54:40.000 But there was no second choice.

04:54:41.000 Do you know that?

04:54:42.000 Thank you, brother.

04:54:42.000 You were first choice.

04:54:43.000 I'm deeply honored.

04:54:44.000 100% across the board.

04:54:45.000 When they said, who do you want to have first on Spotify?

04:54:48.000 Before they said Spotify, I said, Duncan Trestle.

04:54:50.000 That's so cool, Joe.

04:54:51.000 I appreciate it, man.

04:54:52.000 So cool.

04:54:52.000 And I really believe that what I said, that I think you and I have different shows.

04:54:57.000 There's something about you and I together that is different than just me by myself.

04:55:01.000 Yeah, man.

04:55:02.000 We're friends.

04:55:03.000 We're not just friends, man.

04:55:05.000 We've known each other for so long, and there's no doubt.

04:55:09.000 We've tested each other back and forth and up and down and left and right.

04:55:13.000 We know we love each other.

04:55:14.000 If you call me up at 3 in the morning, Joe, I need your help. 0.99

04:55:18.000 I am fucking there, dude. 0.99

04:55:20.000 I'm a commando. 1.00

04:55:22.000 I'm ready to drop in from a helicopter.

04:55:24.000 I'm going to save you.

04:55:26.000 And because of that, because of our long relationship, we've been friends for so long, dude.

04:55:34.000 I mean...

04:55:36.000 How long?

04:55:37.000 When did we?

04:55:38.000 Like 90s?

04:55:39.000 When did you start working in the store?

04:55:41.000 90s, dude.

04:55:42.000 We've been friends since the 90s.

04:55:43.000 The 90s.

04:55:44.000 So more than 20 years.

04:55:45.000 Yeah, we've gone.

04:55:46.000 You have seen me go from being the town court of the comedy store to being someone supporting themselves off of their comedy, man.

04:55:53.000 Like you've seen me go from like...

04:55:55.000 You were friends with me when I was like...

04:56:02.000 No one would have ever gambled on anything happening with me other than...

04:56:07.000 No, not no one. 1.00

04:56:08.000 Just no one stupid. 1.00

04:56:10.000 I saw it right away when the moment I first saw you do Little Hobo. 0.99

04:56:17.000 Yeah!

04:56:17.000 Dude, I saw you do Little Hobo in the OR and I'm like, oh my god.

04:56:22.000 Yeah, man.

04:56:23.000 But you keep doing that.

04:56:24.000 To me, that's the thing.

04:56:26.000 You keep doing that.

04:56:28.000 That's the reason that you deserve what you have.

04:56:32.000 You really do.

04:56:33.000 All the haters, all the people who are like...

04:56:35.000 I get the haters.

04:56:36.000 It's like...

04:56:38.000 It doesn't work.

04:56:40.000 The trick is...

04:56:42.000 It's like, I get it.

04:56:44.000 Someone explained it to me.

04:56:46.000 When you look at people that are doing really well, especially if they all socialize with each other, it becomes like a walled garden.

04:56:54.000 And it feels like it's alienated.

04:56:56.000 It feels like you're isolated.

04:56:58.000 You're locked out.

04:56:59.000 And it makes you feel bad. 0.99

04:57:01.000 It makes you feel shitty. 0.93

04:57:03.000 Yeah. 0.63

04:57:04.000 And that's the problem.

04:57:05.000 But you didn't do that.

04:57:06.000 Dude, you hated me.

04:57:07.000 Just so you know.

04:57:08.000 I never hated you.

04:57:09.000 No, you didn't hate me, but you were irritated by me.

04:57:12.000 Cause like, you don't remember when we first met, was in the ballet room, I was with Princess Cory, Cory Como, and like, I was trying to, at the time I was really into like, It wasn't even called trolling them, but it was like saying a thing opposite to what you should say.

04:57:30.000 You were a contrarian.

04:57:32.000 I was being a contrarian.

04:57:33.000 Something came up about marijuana.

04:57:34.000 You mentioned marijuana.

04:57:36.000 I'm sitting with Cory Kilma.

04:57:37.000 I was already nervous around you.

04:57:40.000 Because at the time, you were still in this incredible trajectory. 0.99

04:57:49.000 I made a stupid joke about how weed was, like, bad. 0.84

04:57:52.000 You know, I'd come from, like, I was like, you know, there's never been a time that I haven't been high for years, and, you know, especially then... 0.97

04:58:01.000 But I made this dumb joke about how weed was bad and I remember you looked at me with such such like a scathing look of like because you had just started like understanding how wonderful marijuana was and you really thought I meant weed was bad and I remember Cory gave me this look of like no Duncan no don't don't do the joke It was a terrible moment!

04:58:26.000 Because you weren't in a place where you could even, like, you weren't tolerating that because you were getting high and starting to realize that it wasn't probably what you...

04:58:36.000 Well, I think when I first started smoking pot, I became a zealot.

04:58:39.000 Like, real quick.

04:58:40.000 Yeah.

04:58:40.000 Because I realized I had been lied to.

04:58:43.000 That's it.

04:58:43.000 And I had misunderstood the idea what marijuana was.

04:58:47.000 I became a zealot.

04:58:48.000 That's what it was.

04:58:49.000 You were a zealot in the look you gave me.

04:58:51.000 For sure. 0.99

04:58:52.000 I remember the way you looked at me, I realized, like, God damn, I bet he hates me forever. 0.98

04:58:56.000 No, never. 0.98

04:58:57.000 But today, in the same situation, I'd be like, ha ha!

04:59:01.000 Yeah, right.

04:59:02.000 I would think it was funny.

04:59:03.000 You were defensive.

04:59:04.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

04:59:04.000 I was a zealot.

04:59:05.000 I was certainly a zealot.

04:59:06.000 Once I first experienced marijuana, I became a zealot.

04:59:10.000 But you and I had such awesome conversations.

04:59:13.000 We had most of our conversations when we first became friends on the phone.

04:59:17.000 I would call you up and go, yo dude, I'm here Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday.

04:59:21.000 What's up?

04:59:21.000 What are you doing, man?

04:59:22.000 Like, dude, I read this Elvis Huxley book and you start telling me about some crazy shit. 1.00

04:59:26.000 Yeah. 0.95

04:59:27.000 And you and I would just go, I mean, it would be like a significant chunk of my day on like Mondays when I would call in.

04:59:34.000 So you and I would have these cool conversations.

04:59:36.000 So you take me on the road with you.

04:59:38.000 We go to the Irvine Improv.

04:59:40.000 We're driving back from the Irvine Improv in your car.

04:59:44.000 I'm so stoned.

04:59:45.000 You're playing Terrence McKenna.

04:59:47.000 Terrence McKenna is talking about the singularity.

04:59:50.000 And he's talking about like...

04:59:53.000 This idea that we're accelerating towards this point in the future.

04:59:56.000 Novelty.

04:59:57.000 Novelty.

04:59:57.000 Yeah.

04:59:58.000 And I'll never forget that, right back from the Irvine Improv.

05:00:03.000 I'll never forget it because, like, I'd never heard that Terrence McKenna speech.

05:00:07.000 I knew about Terrence McKenna roughly from, like, you know, I had encountered him in my earlier years as a psychonaut, but, like, something about that particular lecture that you're playing, something about leaving something as weird as a comedy show, And this idea that he was saying,

05:00:24.000 and this is the part that still sticks with me to this day, which is, you know, look, we are heading towards a point Of concurrence of events that is known as the singularity and that the closer we get to it, the more we're going to experience these things,

05:00:41.000 tachyon particles being blown backwards through time that will produce these events in history that we call novelty.

05:00:48.000 And something about that ride back and just that moment, me listening to it, I started thinking, it wasn't like I even thought this isn't real.

05:00:55.000 I thought that is real.

05:00:57.000 And so here we are now, 2020. In the middle of a pandemic, you've become what has been described as the Oprah for men.

05:01:08.000 Bro-pra. 0.99

05:01:09.000 Bro-pra. 0.99

05:01:10.000 And you are, like, you are someone who, like, great leaders and principalities are trying to get into this podcast. 0.99

05:01:17.000 Do you remember when you lived with me and I started buying Buddha shit? 0.99

05:01:21.000 Yeah, man. 1.00

05:01:22.000 You already had the Buddha shit. 1.00

05:01:24.000 But I started buying all this. 1.00

05:01:25.000 I bought a Shiva.

05:01:27.000 I bought this giant bronze Shiva.

05:01:30.000 And you go, hey, you know why you're attracted to this, right?

05:01:35.000 Yeah.

05:01:35.000 Well, that's the thing that weirds me out about you, man.

05:01:38.000 That's the part where I'm like, oh, I get it.

05:01:40.000 It's like, well, there was some realization that happened, and you're picking up on that.

05:01:46.000 And so because you're picking up on that, you have Ganesh out here, and you have all these, like, Eastern symbols, but...

05:01:53.000 I just think they look cool.

05:01:54.000 No, no.

05:01:56.000 That's what I think.

05:01:57.000 Well, yeah, you think they look cool, but also you happen to have this massive audience...

05:02:04.000 Regardless of whatever that is, I just remember that ride back.

05:02:09.000 And I remember thinking, you know, I think there's something real in here.

05:02:16.000 I think what McKenna is saying is probably true.

05:02:18.000 I think this pandemic...

05:02:22.000 I think this pandemic represents something he predicted, which is we're in a novelty wave right now.

05:02:28.000 It's been a century since the last pandemic.

05:02:32.000 No one here knows how to deal with this.

05:02:34.000 So now we're in a novelty wave.

05:02:36.000 We got lazy.

05:02:39.000 We didn't take into account all of the possible variables.

05:02:43.000 And a big one with this administration was pandemics.

05:02:47.000 Yeah, man.

05:02:48.000 But not just that.

05:02:49.000 It's like the problem is like where you're kind of in a bit of a bind is that all this human attention has been placed upon you and you have to wrestle with your identity because...

05:03:00.000 That's why I need you to move to Austin.

05:03:02.000 You don't need me in Austin, my friend.

05:03:04.000 Come help me.

05:03:05.000 Come on.

05:03:06.000 You don't need help.

05:03:06.000 I can't do this to God.

05:03:08.000 I just got you.

05:03:08.000 I'll help you.

05:03:09.000 I'm always there for you, man, but the problem is you have this burden of attention.

05:03:15.000 For whatever reason, people have decided you're one of the magnifying glasses focusing this beam of attention into the world.

05:03:27.000 And so within that is all this room for disaster.

05:03:31.000 You know what I mean?

05:03:37.000 Room for disaster is the perfect way to put it.

05:03:41.000 Oh my god.

05:03:42.000 Yeah, someone pays attention to every aspect of your life.

05:03:45.000 There's so much room for disaster.

05:03:47.000 Yeah, man.

05:03:48.000 But I think at a certain point in time, it's like there's a sacrificial lamb, a person who lays himself down on the cross.

05:03:59.000 Is that you?

05:03:59.000 No.

05:04:00.000 All of us.

05:04:01.000 It's all of us, but really you are in a bit of a bind.

05:04:06.000 Look, man, here's what I love about not being George Washington.

05:04:10.000 I didn't have to make the decisions he made.

05:04:12.000 I'm reading this book, Dune.

05:04:14.000 It's so beautiful.

05:04:15.000 If someone says, Duncan, I know you only have 14 teeth.

05:04:19.000 I don't have to make the decision.

05:04:20.000 But I can sell you all the rest of them.

05:04:23.000 I don't have to be Moses.

05:04:25.000 14 shillings.

05:04:26.000 I don't have to be Jesus.

05:04:26.000 And two pens.

05:04:28.000 I don't have to be Churchill.

05:04:30.000 I don't have to be any of these people, man.

05:04:32.000 I don't want to be them.

05:04:33.000 I would not assign myself to that incarnation.

05:04:36.000 But like in Dune, I'm reading this great book Dune by Frank Herbert.

05:04:40.000 It's so good.

05:04:41.000 And in this desert world, there's these beings called the Fremen. 0.99

05:04:46.000 They represent complete attunement with nature.

05:04:52.000 And so...

05:04:53.000 At this wonderful point in the book, this imperial, galactic representative of this imperialism is like sitting in a canyon with all his wounded men.

05:05:06.000 They're almost done.

05:05:08.000 And the Fremen, one of these tribal beings, is saying to them, you have to make a water decision.

05:05:15.000 And what they mean by that is your wounded men you have to pick one of them to die and will render their body into water because in this world there's no water so you have to make a water decision and the fremen is interacting with a being in this pure way which is the only way you can act if you're truly into a nature you're innocent and it isn't like dark or anything it's like you have to make a water decision and the being is saying to him Like hesitating and the Fremen is saying

05:05:45.000 to him, do you want me to make the water decision for you?

05:05:48.000 And they don't mean it in an aggressive way.

05:05:50.000 They mean like, would you, you love these people?

05:05:53.000 Would you give up the decision to us?

05:05:55.000 Wouldn't you be enough to make the decision yourself?

05:05:59.000 Fortunately in the book, one of them dies.

05:06:01.000 And they're able to, like, rend their body into water.

05:06:04.000 But what I'm saying is, like, the position of power in the whole series of Dune is based on this problem.

05:06:11.000 Which is, like, if you get saddled with any kind of power, even if you want to pretend it's a kind of clownish power, You are still in a very difficult situation because you have to make a water decision. 0.73

05:06:25.000 Like, you will have to, like, if you're Trump and you're a clown president, or if you're Obama, you're some advanced president, or Wayne, you are lost. 0.95

05:06:34.000 There's only 20 of you. 0.98

05:06:35.000 Yeah, man.

05:06:36.000 Someone's got to become water.

05:06:38.000 You have to make a water decision.

05:06:40.000 If you're the president, there's 335 million people.

05:06:45.000 Everything you decide is a water decision.

05:06:47.000 That's a little easier.

05:06:48.000 But if you're on Lost, there's 13 people left.

05:06:52.000 Yeah, man.

05:06:53.000 It's brutal.

05:06:54.000 It's brutal.

05:06:55.000 And like, no matter what trick you try to use to deal with it, no matter what trick you use, you're still forced into this tarot board.

05:07:03.000 It's a predicament, man.

05:07:05.000 It's a Chinese handcuff situation.

05:07:07.000 It's like... 1.00

05:07:08.000 Chinese handcuffs are bullshit. 1.00

05:07:09.000 It's not a Chinese handcuff that's ever been invented. 1.00

05:07:12.000 It's gonna hold me down.

05:07:13.000 It's a creepy place.

05:07:15.000 Chinese handcuffs are like this.

05:07:17.000 Yeah.

05:07:19.000 Well, yeah.

05:07:20.000 I know, man. 0.99

05:07:21.000 But ultimately, it's like, damn. 0.99

05:07:23.000 I always feel bad. 0.99

05:07:24.000 It's like, I never want you to trend on Twitter. 0.99

05:07:26.000 Whenever I see you trending on Twitter, it really sucks for me because I'm like, fuck, is he okay? 0.99

05:07:31.000 That's what I hate about Twitter is people will trend on Twitter. 0.99

05:07:34.000 You know what I'm saying?

05:07:35.000 I do.

05:07:35.000 I get it.

05:07:36.000 I hate it because I'm like, shit, was he in a car accident? 1.00

05:07:39.000 Stay off Twitter. 1.00

05:07:40.000 Yeah, you're right.

05:07:41.000 I gotta stay on Twitter.

05:07:42.000 I just don't think it's good for you.

05:07:44.000 The problem is you're interacting with people that don't, they're not communicating, first of all, and foremost, maybe.

05:07:53.000 They're not communicating with people that are right in front of them.

05:07:57.000 So they don't feel social cues.

05:07:59.000 Right.

05:08:00.000 They don't feel empathy.

05:08:01.000 You're right, man. 0.98

05:08:02.000 And so they're talking in this weird way that's only existed for like fucking ten years. 0.93

05:08:08.000 It's at Duncan Trussell on Twitter. 0.95

05:08:10.000 Follow me.

05:08:11.000 Duncan Trussell on Twitter.

05:08:12.000 No, you're right, man.

05:08:13.000 I agree with you.

05:08:14.000 Two S's, two L's? 0.70

05:08:15.000 No, Jaron Lanier. 0.99

05:08:17.000 You know, like the idea is like, get the fuck off social media. 0.99

05:08:19.000 I agree. 0.93

05:08:20.000 I don't think that's right either.

05:08:23.000 Is it weird for this to- Listen, I think.

05:08:25.000 I think.

05:08:26.000 I think it's inevitable.

05:08:28.000 I think it's too big.

05:08:29.000 Too much of a part of everything.

05:08:31.000 I think there's no...

05:08:33.000 I don't think there's a future in telling people to stay off it.

05:08:37.000 I think there's more of a future of telling people to understand what it is and manage it.

05:08:45.000 To look at social media, to look at Twitter and Instagram and all those things and understand what they are.

05:08:51.000 I don't think you'd have to get off, but you should spend a lot of time outside of that.

05:08:55.000 I gotta get off there, man.

05:08:57.000 It's not good to read comments.

05:08:59.000 It's not good to...

05:09:02.000 Google your name.

05:09:03.000 I think that's good.

05:09:04.000 And that's how when you see me and you see I'm okay.

05:09:07.000 That's why because I don't do those things. 0.91

05:09:09.000 You get crazy.

05:09:10.000 Should we cut ourselves for a Spotify? 0.86

05:09:13.000 Should we like do like a little blood brother ritual where we cut our fingers and like mix our blood? 1.00

05:09:17.000 That's how you get your fucking COVID test earlier. 1.00

05:09:19.000 Let's do it. 1.00

05:09:20.000 We're like COVID. We don't have COVID anymore.

05:09:23.000 Should we like do a slice?

05:09:25.000 No.

05:09:26.000 Come on, it's good.

05:09:28.000 Why not?

05:09:30.000 All great rituals are based in some kind of blood bond.

05:09:34.000 Do you think there's this...

05:09:36.000 Honestly, if you didn't know me, if I wasn't your friend, would you think there's a responsibility that I have that I'm not meeting?

05:09:44.000 No, I think you're meeting it.

05:09:45.000 I think the problem is, it's hilarious.

05:09:50.000 In Star Trek, Captain Kirk, if you're going to be someone who gets to be a commander of a starship, you're given a problem that is unsolvable.

05:10:01.000 So no matter what you do, you can't win.

05:10:04.000 When you get to a certain level of power, any decision you make...

05:10:09.000 On some level is wrong and right simultaneously.

05:10:12.000 This is quantum computing, my friend.

05:10:14.000 So I do not, you know, in my analysis of your podcast and all my deep judgmental qualities, I do not see what you're doing as being wrong at all.

05:10:27.000 I see sometimes you make naive decisions that I would make too.

05:10:30.000 Like what?

05:10:30.000 What would you say?

05:10:31.000 I think sometimes you have people on who later found out to be, at least in the moment they were on the show, a little fucked up. 0.87

05:10:39.000 For sure, in the early days.

05:10:41.000 I had an issue in the early days where I didn't want to admit that I was getting as many views as there was.

05:10:48.000 And I would do a show, and I was just like, no one's watching this.

05:10:51.000 And I would have some crazy person on.

05:10:53.000 There was a few that I was like, I shouldn't have talked to that dude. 1.00

05:10:58.000 That dude was fucked up. 0.99

05:11:00.000 But that was a learning process. 1.00

05:11:03.000 There's a thing about doing a podcast.

05:11:06.000 Where there's no school for it, right?

05:11:09.000 There's no way to figure out how to do it perfectly.

05:11:12.000 It's not like learning how to play piano.

05:11:14.000 It's real linear.

05:11:15.000 There's all these weird ways to do it, and no one knows.

05:11:18.000 So, unfortunately, I was like...

05:11:22.000 I guess like second generation.

05:11:24.000 First generation is for sure Adam Curry.

05:11:27.000 He's the podfather.

05:11:28.000 And then there's like Adam Carolla.

05:11:31.000 There's a few other people.

05:11:33.000 But I came right after that.

05:11:35.000 Yeah.

05:11:36.000 2009. So no one knew what the fuck we were doing. 0.98

05:11:40.000 And I think there's certainly been some times where I didn't want to admit that it was reaching as many people as it was. 0.94

05:11:47.000 Yeah.

05:11:48.000 Yeah.

05:11:48.000 You can't think about that, because it makes you feel crazy.

05:11:51.000 Well, that's why I want to have you on, because I knew we were going to get drunk and get high.

05:11:54.000 And the first episode would be as preposterous as an episode could be.

05:11:58.000 Yeah, and then from this, you can have people on who are real pundits or whatever. 0.98

05:12:02.000 I mean, look, man, anyone I've ever talked to, anytime I've ever been in this situation where people are talking shit about you, or like...

05:12:10.000 Questioning my friendship with you because you had this person or that person on.

05:12:15.000 If I'm friends with you, something's weird with you or me or whatever, I always and will forever stand up for you, man, because I know you.

05:12:27.000 And to me, it's like, look, you got into this ridiculous predicament.

05:12:36.000 Like, you're in a bind, man. 0.99

05:12:39.000 You are.

05:12:40.000 You are in a bind.

05:12:41.000 And it's a beautiful bind, but it's a real problem.

05:12:45.000 But like, because of your heart, which is very open and very sweet, you allow this like...

05:12:53.000 You allow a lot of people on your podcast that don't make sense according to the zeitgeist.

05:12:59.000 And some people get mad at you!

05:13:01.000 And they pounce!

05:13:02.000 And I always feel so rotten about that.

05:13:06.000 Because it's like, man, you don't understand.

05:13:07.000 This is a real progressive.

05:13:10.000 Like, you're looking at someone who is exactly the being that you would hope... 0.98

05:13:16.000 Would be the like result of like great government and great education and you're fucking attacking an ally. 0.59

05:13:23.000 That's the part that gets me up where I get really bummed is it's like man you have to understand that person look you should if you ask me I feel like Duncan should I have Ben Shapiro on?

05:13:35.000 I feel like no no there's so many better people to have on than that guy but it doesn't mean you can't have those other people on too Well, if you listen to me! 0.96

05:13:45.000 But I would say to you, I go, listen, man, I know what you're saying, but if I just took you to dinner, you, me, and Ben Shapiro went to some fucking kosher joint. 0.79

05:13:54.000 I love hanging out with him. 0.94

05:13:56.000 I guarantee you'd like him.

05:13:58.000 No, I know that.

05:13:59.000 He's a good guy.

05:14:00.000 No, I know.

05:14:00.000 The problem is not him.

05:14:02.000 The problem is all the people's reactions to him and him.

05:14:09.000 There's two things going on.

05:14:10.000 There's two things.

05:14:11.000 The things that he said and the reactions.

05:14:13.000 Yeah, man.

05:14:13.000 And the fact that he's kind of weaponized their reactions.

05:14:16.000 Yeah.

05:14:16.000 He's a good guy.

05:14:18.000 Look, I don't...

05:14:18.000 To me, it's like...

05:14:19.000 I would be so bored if you only have people on this show that I agreed with. 0.98

05:14:26.000 It would be such a shitty show. 0.73

05:14:28.000 But I do have a rule where I won't... 0.82

05:14:32.000 I don't have anybody on anymore unless I feel that they enter into those arguments with good faith.

05:14:39.000 Yeah, man.

05:14:39.000 I know that.

05:14:40.000 And I feel like Ben Shapiro, he enters into all discussions with good faith.

05:14:44.000 He's not an insulting guy.

05:14:46.000 He and I have a...

05:14:48.000 Interesting conversations about gay marriage, interesting conversations about all sorts of aspects of society, racial relations, Black Lives Matters.

05:14:59.000 And he and I have talked about it in a very respectful way, even though we disagree.

05:15:04.000 There's been no insults.

05:15:07.000 There's been no shittiness.

05:15:08.000 And I think that's the problem with putting a guy like that on some sort of a standard traditional talk show.

05:15:14.000 You have him on and some social justice warrior and they argue with each other and you got a host and you break every seven minutes to go to commercial.

05:15:22.000 You don't find out what he's about.

05:15:24.000 He's not a bad guy, man.

05:15:26.000 And he gets shaped as much by those seven-minute segments where you're battling it out with someone, trying to get sound.

05:15:33.000 As you and I do by three-minute spots at the Comedy Store trying to pass open mic night.

05:15:38.000 Based on this podcast, you would imagine that I have a chip on my shoulder about Ben Shapiro, which I really don't.

05:15:43.000 I don't think you do.

05:15:45.000 And the reason I brought up Eddie Bravo is only because, like...

05:15:49.000 I think what you're doing is really sweet and good, and I think your heart is in the same place it was when I met you a while ago, which is pretty bizarre.

05:15:57.000 They would somehow maintain a thing that's integral.

05:16:03.000 You meet people out here who go through rough patches, and they're not who they portrayed themselves as initially. 0.95

05:16:11.000 They're actually con artists or fuck-ups or bad temporarily.

05:16:15.000 I think people get better, but sometimes they're bad temporarily.

05:16:18.000 You really like have like maintained this I think a really beautiful kind of North Star regarding your ethics and your consideration of things.

05:16:30.000 So, yeah, man, I'm like, I'll do anything for you, really.

05:16:35.000 I'm one of your great devotees. 0.99

05:16:37.000 I'll kill for you, Joe! 1.00

05:16:40.000 I'm one of your great devotees. 1.00

05:16:42.000 I really am, too, man.

05:16:44.000 I feel like, legitimately, honestly, I feel like I've been tested.

05:16:52.000 Where I've been given an opportunity to help other people, and I feel like there's no controversy in my mind.

05:17:01.000 My mind knows the right choice.

05:17:03.000 Yeah, man.

05:17:03.000 And so I've always tried to promote all these different comics, and I think that that's what we should all do with each other.

05:17:09.000 I don't think we need to make all the money.

05:17:12.000 I think you need to make some money, I need to make some money.

05:17:16.000 What do we need, man? 0.99

05:17:17.000 We need barbecues and fucking margaritas. 1.00

05:17:21.000 We need hugs and a good sound system. 0.99

05:17:24.000 I'm not a selfish person.

05:17:25.000 I've seen a lot of people be selfish.

05:17:27.000 I've never seen you be like, this is the thing, I don't care.

05:17:30.000 But here's how I'm selfish.

05:17:32.000 I'm selfish and then I'm not selfish.

05:17:34.000 Because I know that being selfish is negative to you.

05:17:37.000 It's bad for you.

05:17:38.000 It's dangerous.

05:17:39.000 It's sloppy.

05:17:40.000 It's weak. 1.00

05:17:41.000 It's some bitch ass shit. 1.00

05:17:43.000 So I'm never selfish. 1.00

05:17:45.000 Because I'm selfish. 0.98

05:17:46.000 Because I don't want myself to be a bitch. 0.99

05:17:48.000 You discovered a thing. 0.99

05:17:50.000 I figured it out when I was jealous.

05:17:52.000 I figured it out when I was younger. 1.00

05:17:54.000 I remember watching comics who were better than me when I was like 21, and I was thinking like, God, fuck these guys. 0.99

05:18:00.000 How did he come up with that joke? 0.98

05:18:01.000 And then I don't remember when it happened, but it was early, like 21, 22. I remember catching it and going, Oh, I caught a bad pattern.

05:18:12.000 I got this pattern where I'm jealous.

05:18:14.000 Or I could be the way I was before I ever got into comedy, which is inspired.

05:18:20.000 Instead, I was jealous.

05:18:21.000 And so it made me realize, oh, I've got a bad pattern that I'm chasing this bad pattern.

05:18:27.000 Do you remember that time, Joe, that we drank a bowl of blood in front of that Moloch statue? 0.99

05:18:33.000 It was chicken blood.

05:18:34.000 Yeah, it was delicious.

05:18:36.000 Anyway, whatever.

05:18:38.000 Look, I feel like...

05:18:40.000 It's like...

05:18:41.000 I do...

05:18:42.000 Is this the longest podcast ever?

05:18:44.000 Look, it doesn't matter.

05:18:45.000 Where are we at?

05:18:46.000 We're done.

05:18:46.000 I gotta pee again.

05:18:47.000 Let's wrap it up.

05:18:48.000 Let's wrap it up.

05:18:49.000 But what are we at?

05:18:50.000 Five and a half hours.

05:18:52.000 It's over.

05:18:52.000 We did it.

05:18:53.000 I think Kevin Smith was five hours.

05:18:55.000 We won, Joe!

05:18:56.000 Thank God!

05:18:57.000 You think we should do this in two podcasts?

05:18:59.000 I think we should.

05:19:00.000 Whatever you want to do with that, I don't care.

05:19:01.000 Right?

05:19:02.000 Listen, Spotify, don't get greedy.

05:19:05.000 We gave you a six-hour opening podcast.

05:19:08.000 God bless you, Spotify.

05:19:08.000 Five and a half hours?

05:19:09.000 Thanks, my friends.

05:19:10.000 It gets better.

05:19:11.000 There's going to be actual scientists on this show if you keep listening.

05:19:14.000 I will talk Duncan Trussell into doing regular podcasts.

05:19:17.000 No problem.

05:19:18.000 Either through Zoom or Skype.

05:19:19.000 You already did it.

05:19:20.000 Anything.

05:19:21.000 I have thoughts.

05:19:22.000 I have ideas.

05:19:23.000 I want to help.

05:19:25.000 I would have this conversation if we were recording.

05:19:27.000 That's the funny thing.

05:19:28.000 I feel like I've been extending it just because I want to keep talking.

05:19:32.000 I know.

05:19:33.000 Me too, man.

05:19:34.000 We're gonna help.

05:19:35.000 Alright.

05:19:35.000 How'd I kiss that?

05:19:36.000 My friends.

05:19:37.000 Jamie, I'm sorry we kept you.

05:19:37.000 Big kiss.

05:19:42.000 We should've done the blood ritual. 0.95

05:19:45.000 I would've cut myself. 1.00

05:19:46.000 We fucked up. 1.00

The Joe Rogan Experience - August 31, 2020

Joe Rogan Experience #1530 - Duncan Trussell

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript