The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #1796 - Ali Siddiq

00:00:01.000 Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out!

00:00:04.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.

00:00:06.000 Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.

00:00:12.000 What's happening?

00:00:13.000 What's happening?

00:00:14.000 Man, good to be seen, man.

00:00:14.000 How are you?

00:00:14.000 Good to see you.

00:00:17.000 Glad you're here.

00:00:18.000 You were telling me about the gauntlet you've been running with masks.

00:00:21.000 Oh, man.

00:00:24.000 I don't know if people know.

00:00:26.000 It's harder for people that's in the business right now than regular civilians if you're doing any type of work.

00:00:32.000 You mean show business?

00:00:32.000 Show business.

00:00:33.000 Yes, because they want a mask on you.

00:00:36.000 As soon as you finish delivering your lines, they want you to put that mask back on.

00:00:40.000 Before you go to makeup, they want you to...

00:00:41.000 Man, it's insane.

00:00:42.000 Is it standard, though?

00:00:43.000 Is that like every production?

00:00:45.000 That's every production.

00:00:46.000 They are masked up.

00:00:46.000 Really?

00:00:48.000 But it doesn't have to be a good mask.

00:00:50.000 No, it doesn't have to be a good mask.

00:00:51.000 So it's just a gesture.

00:00:52.000 You could use your sleeve, just cover your face.

00:00:56.000 Longer stuff that's over your face.

00:00:58.000 Can you have a bandana like a bandit?

00:00:59.000 Yeah, like you could just pull up, just pull, you don't even, your shirt, just pull your shirt over your face. 1.00

00:01:04.000 Oh, it's so stupid. 0.99

00:01:06.000 They need you to have a mask. 1.00

00:01:07.000 And I understand people catching, I don't know if people believe as much as they did.

00:01:14.000 Like, I'm willing to cross the line a lot now since I'm...

00:01:18.000 Once I knew how COVID was, it's like I had COVID in the beginning, like full-fledged.

00:01:26.000 You had it longer than anybody I've ever known.

00:01:29.000 I've never known anybody who tested positive as long as you did.

00:01:32.000 It was like 30 how many days?

00:01:34.000 32 straight days.

00:01:36.000 That's crazy.

00:01:37.000 When I heard negative, I was so elated.

00:01:41.000 Like, what?

00:01:41.000 Negative?

00:01:43.000 And...

00:01:45.000 I think once I've had it, and I had the full blast, like the shotgun to the face when it was new.

00:01:51.000 They didn't even have a vaccination.

00:01:53.000 They didn't know what to do.

00:01:55.000 No medicine.

00:01:56.000 No tricks.

00:01:58.000 You couldn't even listen to people who didn't even know what they were talking about.

00:02:00.000 They didn't even know what to say.

00:02:01.000 Like, man, I don't know what to do.

00:02:04.000 I can make up something, but I can't even really...

00:02:06.000 I don't know!

00:02:07.000 The bleach, when he said the bleach, it was like, eh, possible.

00:02:11.000 Right.

00:02:12.000 I was in that room long enough to be like, yo, if this lady leave this cleaner supply bucket by me, I'm going for the bleach. 1.00

00:02:20.000 I'm taking it.

00:02:21.000 You never know.

00:02:22.000 You never know.

00:02:23.000 She can work. 0.85

00:02:24.000 So...

00:02:26.000 Now, any variant I hear about now, I feel like is weak.

00:02:29.000 Like, okay, come on.

00:02:30.000 Come on, new COVID. They are weak now.

00:02:34.000 I got the new one.

00:02:35.000 The new one was nothing.

00:02:37.000 It was nothing.

00:02:37.000 I couldn't believe it was COVID. I came in here, I had a snuffly nose, and I was saying to the nurse, just joking around, maybe I got it, maybe I got it.

00:02:44.000 She's like, you're not going to fucking believe this. 0.92

00:02:46.000 You're positive. 0.98

00:02:47.000 I'm like, what?

00:02:48.000 I go, this is COVID? This is the new COVID? It's so weak.

00:02:54.000 The new COVID is like the new NBA. It's like the new NFL. It's like so soft.

00:03:01.000 It's like, okay, LeBron, hey, I'm not going to say he's not going to end up being the greatest player, but it's still going to be that if you didn't play against the bad boys or the Knicks, I'm still doubting your toughness.

00:03:15.000 I'm still going to doubt it because basketball is soft now.

00:03:18.000 You can travel.

00:03:19.000 I Have you watched basketball lately?

00:03:24.000 Not lately.

00:03:26.000 What's going on?

00:03:27.000 Standard basketball, how it was invented.

00:03:32.000 Once you catch the ball, you have two steps and you're supposed to be in the air.

00:03:36.000 Oh no.

00:03:37.000 Just for showmanship alone, we'll give you at least six.

00:03:42.000 Come on.

00:03:43.000 Really?

00:03:45.000 The Joker, yesterday he got a bounce pass.

00:03:48.000 It was like step, step, Step and then jump.

00:03:51.000 Like, that's travel, sir.

00:03:52.000 But it was an open dunk.

00:03:55.000 Give it to him.

00:03:55.000 LeBron travels all the time.

00:03:57.000 Really?

00:03:58.000 Everybody who you think is great, if the referees...

00:04:03.000 That's why I don't even...

00:04:04.000 If somebody complains a referee, I'd be like, really?

00:04:06.000 He's let you get away with like 19 bank robbers and he calls you for one. 0.99

00:04:11.000 And then now all of a sudden you're like, man, are you insane? 0.79

00:04:14.000 But if it was old refs, remember the old white guy that everybody used to get mad at? 0.59

00:04:19.000 But he was a real ref. 0.94

00:04:21.000 Hey, that's a foul.

00:04:22.000 You can't do that, sir.

00:04:23.000 That's a foul.

00:04:24.000 Hey, so you took 24 steps.

00:04:26.000 What you want from me?

00:04:28.000 But now it's like, oh, flagrant.

00:04:32.000 You're out here cursing, sir.

00:04:34.000 But you are.

00:04:36.000 I let you travel.

00:04:37.000 I let you push that man down.

00:04:39.000 I let you DDT a man. 1.00

00:04:40.000 I let you DDT an actual human being and I never called anything.

00:04:44.000 Sir, you were hanging on the rim.

00:04:46.000 You went in the stands, ate popcorn, came back.

00:04:48.000 I never called anything.

00:04:50.000 This is a flagrant.

00:04:51.000 I don't follow basketball, but how come rims stopped breaking?

00:04:55.000 How come the backboard stopped breaking?

00:04:57.000 Because remember Daryl Dawkins?

00:04:59.000 Oh, he jumped up and smashed those things.

00:05:02.000 The game was over.

00:05:04.000 It was glass.

00:05:04.000 They're not glass anymore?

00:05:05.000 No, it's plexiglass.

00:05:08.000 And then they had these...

00:05:09.000 You know, remember when Shaq pulled a hole...

00:05:12.000 Like, Daryl Dawkins broke the glass.

00:05:15.000 And, you know, he's a big man coming up...

00:05:18.000 But Shaq, he brought down the whole entire rim. 0.96

00:05:22.000 Like the shock system.

00:05:24.000 Like he came down.

00:05:25.000 And then they reinforced all that.

00:05:28.000 They got better.

00:05:29.000 They like, no.

00:05:30.000 Have you seen Shaq lately?

00:05:31.000 I haven't seen Shaq in person in probably about five or six years.

00:05:37.000 In person.

00:05:38.000 The last time I saw him in person was probably eight months ago.

00:05:40.000 But I saw him on the internet yesterday. 0.88

00:05:43.000 And he looks fucking great. 0.98

00:05:44.000 He's getting a six pack. 0.99

00:05:46.000 Shaq's lost a shitload of weight.

00:05:48.000 He looks great.

00:05:49.000 He's got a six-pack.

00:05:51.000 How old is Shaq?

00:05:53.000 50?

00:05:53.000 Oh yeah, I gotta do it now.

00:05:55.000 I gotta do it.

00:05:56.000 I'm 48. I know I done trimmed all the way down.

00:05:58.000 Six-pack gotta be next.

00:06:00.000 Because I can't let Shaq Have a six-pack ever in his life and me not have one right now.

00:06:06.000 You should see it.

00:06:06.000 Find the pictures of Shaq lately.

00:06:10.000 He changed his diet. 0.99

00:06:11.000 Stopped eating bullshit. 0.99

00:06:12.000 Works out every day. 1.00

00:06:14.000 He trimmed his body down.

00:06:16.000 He looks good.

00:06:17.000 I hurt my hand so it had stopped.

00:06:20.000 You see how that knuckle is like...

00:06:21.000 This knuckle is way up.

00:06:23.000 Look at him.

00:06:24.000 Look at that.

00:06:28.000 It's as if you can see it.

00:06:30.000 Yeah, it's coming.

00:06:32.000 But look how big he look, though.

00:06:34.000 He's so big.

00:06:35.000 Shaq look diesel. 1.00

00:06:37.000 Oh, I got to go in.

00:06:39.000 I think there's pictures of him that look better than that.

00:06:41.000 I know.

00:06:42.000 I got to go in now.

00:06:44.000 Like, I thought I was going in, but I'm about to definitely go in.

00:06:47.000 Yeah, there he goes.

00:06:47.000 Looks pretty fucking good there on the right.

00:06:50.000 That may be photoshopped. 0.96

00:06:52.000 That looks a little fake.

00:06:53.000 That one looks a little fake.

00:06:55.000 His face not matching his body.

00:06:59.000 The ones that I saw was him working out.

00:07:01.000 It was, oh, it was that image down there.

00:07:02.000 You see the image of him doing the chin-up in the lower left-hand corner?

00:07:05.000 Right there.

00:07:06.000 See that?

00:07:06.000 Lower left-hand corner.

00:07:08.000 Drop right below that.

00:07:09.000 Below that.

00:07:10.000 To the right.

00:07:11.000 Do one of him doing it right there.

00:07:12.000 Right there.

00:07:12.000 Click on that.

00:07:13.000 That's what it was from the New York Post.

00:07:15.000 So it had all these images of him looking. 1.00

00:07:18.000 So he quit eating sandwiches and quit eating bullshit. 0.98

00:07:21.000 And so they had all these images of him working out. 0.99

00:07:24.000 He lost a shitload of weight, though.

00:07:26.000 But no nice.

00:07:27.000 Yeah.

00:07:29.000 Got to work with sponsors.

00:07:32.000 Oh yeah.

00:07:33.000 Dude, I was watching you work out.

00:07:34.000 You can box.

00:07:36.000 You can box.

00:07:36.000 I got a little something.

00:07:37.000 I was watching you throw your hands.

00:07:39.000 I was like, he knows what he's doing.

00:07:41.000 Got a good trainer.

00:07:43.000 How long you been doing it?

00:07:45.000 I don't count little, because that's what old men go back. 1.00

00:07:48.000 You know, when I was younger.

00:07:49.000 So, we're going to say a year.

00:07:51.000 Just back in the gym, trimming down, getting back in it, and start.

00:07:58.000 Because I wanted to fight Cat Williams so bad.

00:08:00.000 Really?

00:08:01.000 I just really wanted to just...

00:08:01.000 Yeah, man.

00:08:04.000 How'd you want to fight Cat Williams? 0.99

00:08:06.000 He did some shit, and then when he said that he was the person that started celebrity boxing, and I said, cool, since you started celebrity boxing... 0.96

00:08:17.000 Nobody's ever seen you fight. 0.99

00:08:19.000 So since you started, why don't you fight somebody who wants to fight you?

00:08:24.000 He called out Kevin.

00:08:26.000 I think Kevin will win too, but why don't you fight somebody who want to actually fight you?

00:08:31.000 And that's the difference.

00:08:33.000 I would fight anybody who actually wanted to fight me.

00:08:35.000 No problem. 0.92

00:08:36.000 Let's fight.

00:08:37.000 Especially if I want to fight you too.

00:08:39.000 But Kat, I got a problem with Kat. 0.80

00:08:43.000 I just do.

00:08:44.000 What's your problem? 1.00

00:08:46.000 Some shit that he did, man. 1.00

00:08:48.000 I don't like people not being a man. 1.00

00:08:51.000 When you got something to say to me, just say it to me. 0.98

00:08:53.000 Don't do no shit like telling people I can't come in the arena and I just performed and you holding me out the arena? 0.98

00:09:01.000 What? 0.99

00:09:02.000 And they paid me outside?

00:09:04.000 And then you never talked to me about it.

00:09:04.000 What?

00:09:06.000 But the problem I have with that is when we was in Shreveport and somebody was about to fuck you up, I intervened. 0.97

00:09:16.000 I didn't let you sit out there like that. 0.97

00:09:18.000 I intervened.

00:09:19.000 How did this all get started?

00:09:21.000 So what happened, I'm performing with Kat in Houston at the NRG Arena.

00:09:29.000 We do two shows, two different days.

00:09:32.000 And then the second day, I go outside to see one of my friends named Ghetto.

00:09:37.000 He outside.

00:09:38.000 I'm talking to him, so I get ready to come back in the arena.

00:09:41.000 The people, the security at the arena, they all locked arms.

00:09:47.000 And I'm walking in, they're like, Ollie, we can't let you back in the arena.

00:09:51.000 I'm like, what?

00:09:54.000 I'm in my hometown.

00:09:55.000 Like, y'all know me.

00:09:56.000 Like, there's people who know me.

00:09:57.000 They're like, can't let you back in the arena.

00:10:02.000 But my stuff's still in the green room.

00:10:04.000 Like, first of all, I don't know what's happening.

00:10:06.000 Like, what happened?

00:10:07.000 Let's go to that point.

00:10:09.000 Like, why can't I come back in the place that I just walked off?

00:10:13.000 Like, what's going on?

00:10:14.000 So Carl, this guy who works for Cat, comes in and he's talking over the people.

00:10:20.000 Like, he's talking over their shoulders.

00:10:21.000 Like, Cat say he don't want you back in the arena. 0.98

00:10:25.000 And now I'm like, who the fuck is Cat to tell me I can't come in the arena? 0.98

00:10:29.000 That you just worked in. 0.99

00:10:31.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:10:32.000 But the thing is, I don't know what the fuck is going on. 0.99

00:10:36.000 Right. 0.99

00:10:37.000 And you can come and say, hey man, I got this type of problem, X, Y, and Z. Man, if you don't mind.

00:10:42.000 I ain't got no problem with that.

00:10:44.000 But you can't direct somebody in my city to put me out. 0.99

00:10:49.000 Like, man, do you know who the fuck I am? 0.99

00:10:52.000 Like, for real? 0.99

00:10:55.000 Like, for real? 0.99

00:10:58.000 All the rest of that other shit out the way. 1.00

00:11:00.000 Like, do you know who the fuck I am? 0.99

00:11:01.000 Like, for real, for real. 0.99

00:11:02.000 Like, in these streets. 0.99

00:11:04.000 Like, that's the fucking problem with me. 1.00

00:11:06.000 Like, and then you... 1.00

00:11:09.000 But I don't understand.

00:11:10.000 Like, what?

00:11:11.000 There was no dispute?

00:11:12.000 No!

00:11:13.000 You have no idea why?

00:11:14.000 It's like me walking out of this room right now to get some water and come back in and he said, Joe, say he don't want you back in the studio.

00:11:24.000 So no explanation. 0.84

00:11:25.000 But Kat's known to be crazy. 1.00

00:11:27.000 Still to this day, I have no explanation for this shit. 1.00

00:11:33.000 He's a funny motherfucker. 1.00

00:11:34.000 He is funny as shit. 1.00

00:11:36.000 But he's known to be crazy. 1.00

00:11:38.000 And it's part of why he's funny. 1.00

00:11:40.000 I mean, he's just out of his fucking mind. 0.99

00:11:43.000 It's like this. 1.00

00:11:48.000 You can be known to be something that you're not.

00:11:54.000 Not crazy.

00:11:56.000 You don't think he's crazy? 0.99

00:11:57.000 But when you do shit that you think that you don't have to answer for. 0.99

00:12:03.000 Like, it'll be a space that we'll eventually be in. 1.00

00:12:07.000 Like, this is the danger in this shit. 1.00

00:12:10.000 Because it's like this. 1.00

00:12:13.000 Because I know better than to leave something fucked up in the streets. 0.98

00:12:16.000 I know better than that. 0.98

00:12:18.000 That's like a street rule.

00:12:19.000 You don't ever leave something unsettled in the streets. 1.00

00:12:23.000 Because you never know what that person, how that person feels about that shit. 1.00

00:12:30.000 Benny Blanco from the Bronx. 1.00

00:12:34.000 People always got to remember, in Kalito's way, you fucked up Benny Blanco. 0.97

00:12:40.000 And you threw Benny Blanco down them steps and all the rest of that. 0.98

00:12:43.000 Cool!

00:12:45.000 And you remember me?

00:12:48.000 Benny Blanco from the Bronx.

00:12:50.000 And blew his brains out.

00:12:52.000 I don't leave nothing unsettled in the streets. 0.79

00:12:55.000 Not with somebody who I don't know what they cable.

00:12:58.000 But you know.

00:12:59.000 You know.

00:13:01.000 Like, you punched a kid.

00:13:03.000 Well, the kid got him in a headlock.

00:13:06.000 I punched a kid.

00:13:07.000 How old was that kid?

00:13:09.000 15?

00:13:09.000 Like 14, 15. I don't even want this shit to be...

00:13:14.000 Because it's just me. 0.99

00:13:15.000 I'm not finna call no entourage.

00:13:17.000 I'm not finna call no other people.

00:13:19.000 See, when you're not a man, that's what you do.

00:13:21.000 You call somebody else to settle your disputes.

00:13:24.000 I'm a man.

00:13:25.000 Whenever you see me...

00:13:26.000 It's like you don't even know what the dispute is.

00:13:26.000 But this is what's confusing.

00:13:28.000 That doesn't make any sense.

00:13:29.000 And that's the thing.

00:13:29.000 You left it blank.

00:13:30.000 And that's what you can't do.

00:13:32.000 You can't leave it blank.

00:13:34.000 That doesn't make sense.

00:13:35.000 You should have said what the dispute was.

00:13:37.000 Ali, I put you out the arena for this reason.

00:13:39.000 Understood.

00:13:40.000 So you had done a bunch of shows.

00:13:42.000 How many shows you done with him?

00:13:43.000 This was just this.

00:13:45.000 It was just two days.

00:13:45.000 You've done many shows with him in the past?

00:13:47.000 Nah, maybe like four in total.

00:13:49.000 Four?

00:13:49.000 So just two days.

00:13:51.000 You do...

00:13:51.000 Is this the second day?

00:13:52.000 Mm-hmm.

00:13:54.000 And he says...

00:13:54.000 This is a Friday.

00:13:55.000 This is a Friday.

00:13:56.000 We did a show on that Thursday.

00:13:58.000 This was a Friday.

00:13:59.000 It was in February.

00:14:03.000 Back in 2009. I still remember.

00:14:10.000 You haven't seen him since? 0.97

00:14:12.000 I've been places where I thought he was at and I beelined in the shit and he wasn't there. 0.81

00:14:16.000 Because see now, I don't even feel it's necessary for it to be I want it for a bag, though. 0.97

00:14:25.000 Like, I want to make some money doing it.

00:14:27.000 Is there money in that?

00:14:29.000 Like, people are making good money in celebrity boxing? 0.99

00:14:31.000 Man, fucking, this dude, I did some research, and this dude, he was in a boxing match with somebody. 0.98

00:14:37.000 They ain't even real big celebrities. 1.00

00:14:40.000 He took this shit on two weeks notice for $150,000 for a four-round fight that's goddamn a minute. 0.99

00:14:47.000 It's not even a real fight like that. 1.00

00:14:49.000 Like a minute rounds? 0.93

00:14:50.000 It's like a minute 30 or some shit like that. 0.90

00:14:53.000 $150,000? 0.99

00:14:54.000 Dancing Danny Dave or some shit was his name. 1.00

00:14:58.000 People getting money for this shit. 0.98

00:15:00.000 I'm like, I'll go in and settle a dispute for $250,000. 1.00

00:15:07.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:15:09.000 Do you think Kat would do that?

00:15:12.000 Once you said you started celebrity boxing, that's what...

00:15:15.000 How could he say he did that?

00:15:16.000 Is he joking around?

00:15:18.000 I don't know. 1.00

00:15:19.000 He said that shit for real in a real interview. 1.00

00:15:21.000 I started celebrity boxing, and I'm like, go! 1.00

00:15:24.000 That's the ticket.

00:15:25.000 That's the ticket.

00:15:27.000 If you want to settle a dispute... 1.00

00:15:29.000 And you got some problem with somebody, take that shit to Triller or whoever want to buy it. 1.00

00:15:35.000 And boom, you make the money like that instead of you having to be in the street and the shit being violent. 1.00

00:15:42.000 That's how I see it. 0.99

00:15:43.000 Get a bag for doing it.

00:15:45.000 Well, that definitely makes more sense.

00:15:47.000 Makes absolute perfect sense to me.

00:15:49.000 But he's a small fella.

00:15:51.000 Like, he's not very large.

00:15:53.000 He's quite a bit smaller than you, isn't he?

00:15:54.000 I don't know.

00:15:56.000 Cat?

00:15:56.000 Maybe about 5'2", 5'4", 5' whatever he say.

00:16:00.000 Yeah.

00:16:00.000 I'm 5'7".

00:16:01.000 But he's not athletic either, right?

00:16:05.000 I don't know.

00:16:06.000 I don't think so.

00:16:07.000 You know, he acts athletic.

00:16:08.000 You know, and that's the thing.

00:16:11.000 Street dudes, where I was from, you know, in my age group, all street dudes was athletic.

00:16:15.000 Like, they did everything.

00:16:17.000 Like, I don't know one street person that didn't do...

00:16:19.000 He played everything.

00:16:21.000 Like, baseball. 0.99

00:16:22.000 If he couldn't do the shit well, he still knew how to do it. 1.00

00:16:25.000 Right. 0.99

00:16:25.000 But you can't be no street dude and be... 0.99

00:16:27.000 Like, I know cats who rap right now that say they street dudes, but you can't catch. 1.00

00:16:31.000 Like, what type of motherfucker you can't catch? 0.99

00:16:34.000 Like, I watch some of these new celebrity games. 1.00

00:16:39.000 You're like, yo, what type of...

00:16:41.000 Growing up, I was in Rock and Jock.

00:16:45.000 And, like, BVD can actually hoop.

00:16:47.000 Like, these are some actually basketball playing dudes.

00:16:49.000 Like, now the new celebrity is, like, really...

00:16:53.000 Not physical.

00:16:54.000 Like, they don't play outside.

00:16:56.000 Do you remember they had that thing, Battle of the Superstars?

00:16:58.000 Yes. 0.75

00:16:59.000 It was like ABC, Wide World of Sports or some shit like that. 0.98

00:17:02.000 Yes. 0.88

00:17:03.000 Why they don't do it no more?

00:17:03.000 Actors.

00:17:04.000 Because it's terrible.

00:17:05.000 Because the country athletes are worse than that.

00:17:09.000 Like, just think.

00:17:10.000 Did you see 50 Cent throw a pitch?

00:17:14.000 No.

00:17:15.000 It made the national news.

00:17:15.000 Oh, my goodness.

00:17:17.000 This shit was so bad. 1.00

00:17:19.000 I feel like that's a setup. 1.00

00:17:21.000 Anytime you go to throw a pitch, almost nobody looks good throwing a pitch. 1.00

00:17:25.000 Is this shit like... 1.00

00:17:27.000 Here it goes. 1.00

00:17:30.000 Yowza! 1.00

00:17:30.000 Oh, Jesus Christ. 1.00

00:17:32.000 Oh, my God.

00:17:34.000 Oh my god.

00:17:36.000 Oh my god.

00:17:38.000 Oh my god.

00:17:40.000 You talk about not having a father! 1.00

00:17:40.000 Goddamn! 1.00

00:17:45.000 Like, not even in the streets! 1.00

00:17:47.000 Like, I played bitch with you! 1.00

00:17:56.000 I fucking love 50. But when he did that, I was like, you know something? 1.00

00:18:00.000 I got my son up right there. 1.00

00:18:02.000 Get your ass up. 0.99

00:18:03.000 We're going outside. 0.99

00:18:04.000 I know you six months. 1.00

00:18:09.000 Get your ass up. 1.00

00:18:10.000 We're going outside. 0.99

00:18:11.000 Good Lord.

00:18:13.000 You don't want that video out there.

00:18:15.000 There's so many people like that.

00:18:17.000 Fauci, you ever see Fauci throw a pitch?

00:18:18.000 Oh my god.

00:18:19.000 Find Fauci throwing a pitch.

00:18:21.000 It's pretty...

00:18:22.000 50s might have been worse.

00:18:23.000 Let me tell you, the other thing is, when you see people...

00:18:26.000 Dr. Fauci. 1.00

00:18:31.000 It's the same shit! 1.00

00:18:33.000 He's got a mask on too. 1.00

00:18:34.000 Look at him.

00:18:35.000 Outside with a mask on.

00:18:36.000 Dr. Fossey threw a curve fist.

00:18:39.000 Oh my god.

00:18:41.000 That might be one of the worst.

00:18:42.000 And he's got a glove on too.

00:18:43.000 He's got a glove on, bro.

00:18:45.000 Come on.

00:18:46.000 They're not throwing it back to you. 1.00

00:18:47.000 Get the fuck out of here. 1.00

00:18:50.000 He's waving off the catcher. 1.00

00:18:53.000 I'm not actually waving you off.

00:18:54.000 I'm telling you where to go.

00:18:55.000 Go over there.

00:18:56.000 Because this is where the bar... 1.00

00:18:59.000 Fuck me right there. 1.00

00:19:00.000 Go! 1.00

00:19:00.000 What if you don't catch your shit at? 1.00

00:19:01.000 They're both throwing it in the same area. 1.00

00:19:03.000 It's like something's drawing the ball to that.

00:19:06.000 Amen.

00:19:08.000 Some magnet of time.

00:19:10.000 It's the worst thing.

00:19:12.000 Worse than pitches, what people don't get to see, because you see that video.

00:19:17.000 Most people don't video.

00:19:18.000 Have you ever seen somebody, a celebrity, they honoring them, and they had a basketball game, and they come out for charity to shoot the free throw? 0.99

00:19:28.000 And I'm like, damn. 0.96

00:19:30.000 I know them charity people are like, why? 0.99

00:19:33.000 Just say y'all don't want to give us the money. 0.99

00:19:36.000 Just say you want to give us a percentage of this shit. 1.00

00:19:41.000 Who's that? 1.00

00:19:43.000 Stevie Wonder.

00:19:44.000 Oh, what? 1.00

00:19:45.000 They wrong as shit. 1.00

00:19:46.000 Oh, that's terrible. 1.00

00:19:47.000 That's not right.

00:19:48.000 Why would they do Stevie Wonder?

00:19:49.000 That's not right.

00:19:50.000 That better be a blind school where everybody's blind. 1.00

00:19:55.000 Yeah.

00:19:56.000 When you blind, they should have like a ray of golds.

00:20:01.000 All over the place.

00:20:03.000 They just have these goals.

00:20:05.000 Like, what's them drums?

00:20:07.000 Like, when you play and you play all the drums? 0.99

00:20:09.000 They should have that shit for when you're blind and you want to hoop. 0.99

00:20:09.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:20:12.000 They should put like six goals up there like, hey, you're going to hit something.

00:20:15.000 Hopefully.

00:20:17.000 Imagine not knowing the distance of things, though.

00:20:17.000 Hopefully.

00:20:21.000 I just saw a guy blind playing golf today.

00:20:23.000 What?

00:20:24.000 His dad lines him up and he plays.

00:20:26.000 No idea if he's good.

00:20:26.000 What?

00:20:28.000 What?

00:20:28.000 He seems like he's not bad.

00:20:30.000 Do you think he used to have eyesight?

00:20:32.000 I didn't listen to the video.

00:20:33.000 I was just sort of like watching it.

00:20:34.000 Oh, no, you didn't watch in person.

00:20:36.000 It was an Instagram video.

00:20:37.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:20:38.000 No, no.

00:20:38.000 Sorry, yeah, no.

00:20:38.000 Jamie plays a lot of golf.

00:20:40.000 But if you go on the internet, oh.

00:20:42.000 What's the...

00:20:43.000 What's the new dictator of North Korea?

00:20:47.000 You gonna like this?

00:20:48.000 Kim Jong-un?

00:20:48.000 Yeah.

00:20:49.000 What's his daddy name?

00:20:50.000 Kim Jong-il.

00:20:51.000 Kim Jong-il.

00:20:53.000 Okay.

00:20:54.000 Kim Jong-il.

00:20:55.000 I was having a discussion about Kim Jong-il.

00:20:57.000 You gonna like this, whoever plays golf.

00:20:59.000 Apparently, he was just...

00:21:00.000 He was such an amazing man.

00:21:02.000 And this is like...

00:21:03.000 Kim Jong-il.

00:21:04.000 This is like in his official documents.

00:21:06.000 Like, this is the things that he done in his official documents.

00:21:10.000 That apparently when Kim Jong Il was born, all the birds in North Korea started singing in Korean. 0.53

00:21:10.000 Okay. 0.53

00:21:21.000 Apparently.

00:21:22.000 I wasn't there.

00:21:22.000 I can't verify or deny.

00:21:24.000 I was there.

00:21:25.000 Apparently birds in North Korea, they can speak a dialect, maybe Brooklyn birds, rap.

00:21:31.000 But this is what I know that people are going to understand.

00:21:31.000 I don't know.

00:21:36.000 Kim Jong-il.

00:21:38.000 Apparently.

00:21:39.000 Yeah.

00:21:40.000 11 holes in one.

00:21:42.000 First time ever playing golf.

00:21:44.000 First time ever.

00:21:45.000 I was reading this. 1.00

00:21:47.000 I know white men have lost their mind if they ever read this shit. 1.00

00:21:51.000 11 holes in one. 1.00

00:21:52.000 First time ever playing golf.

00:21:54.000 He shot 38 under.

00:21:56.000 11 holes in one at the 7,700-yard championship course at Pyongyang in the very first golf round of his life, according to North Korea state media.

00:22:06.000 This was in 1994 when Kim was 52 years old.

00:22:11.000 Even more impressive, Kim stood just 5'3", yet he was able to overpower a course as long as any ever played in major championship history.

00:22:19.000 Who knows how good Kim could have been if he had taken up the sport earlier.

00:22:27.000 Oh, can you go down and find in 2011?

00:22:31.000 This man is amazing.

00:22:32.000 In 2011, apparently, in the official documents, he created and invented the burrito in 2011. And then when I was reading that, all the rest of that shit, I was okay with it. 0.99

00:22:49.000 Because I wasn't there. 1.00

00:22:50.000 But when he claimed that he created the fucking burrito, I lost it. 0.99

00:22:55.000 I was like, what? 0.99

00:22:57.000 What does it say?

00:22:58.000 The video's not related to the...

00:23:01.000 Oh, it's not...

00:23:02.000 Okay, just the video's unrelated.

00:23:04.000 Kim Jong-il invented this burrito. 0.97

00:23:09.000 You didn't invent no damn burrito. 0.97

00:23:13.000 I've been eating burritos all my life. 0.97

00:23:16.000 When was the burrito officially invented?

00:23:18.000 It's got to be hundreds of years old.

00:23:19.000 Came up with the burrito in 2011 before he died.

00:23:25.000 Before he died of a heart attack.

00:23:28.000 I found the old Blockbuster movie because apparently I was having a Blockbuster night.

00:23:33.000 Inside that movie, it was a receipt.

00:23:37.000 From 1999. On that receipt, I ordered a Taco Supreme, which they got rid of, which I'm still mad at Taco Bell about that shit, and two burritos. 0.99

00:23:49.000 So that's in 1999. So how the hell did he invent it in 2009? 0.98

00:23:53.000 I was pissed. 1.00

00:23:54.000 I said, fuck your meal. 1.00

00:23:55.000 Can you imagine being over there and having to go along with that, though? 1.00

00:24:01.000 They have to go along with everything over there.

00:24:03.000 Like, when he died, they had to cry for days and days and days.

00:24:07.000 And if you didn't cry enough, they'd put you in jail for six months.

00:24:09.000 They felt like you weren't crying enough.

00:24:15.000 They just put you in jail.

00:24:17.000 Imagine growing up there.

00:24:19.000 How are they measuring your tears?

00:24:24.000 You have to keep crying.

00:24:25.000 You ever see it?

00:24:26.000 They're wailing, like acting.

00:24:30.000 Watch this.

00:24:31.000 They show the people on the streets.

00:24:34.000 The people on the streets were just wailing.

00:24:39.000 Here they are.

00:24:40.000 Look at them.

00:24:42.000 They're just screaming and wailing.

00:24:45.000 I don't want to be drinking nothing at this time.

00:24:48.000 Because...

00:24:51.000 See, they have to do this.

00:24:52.000 Like, they have to scream and cry.

00:24:54.000 I had this lady on Yonmi Park. 1.00

00:24:57.000 Did you see the stone face? 1.00

00:24:59.000 His ass is in jail right now. 1.00

00:25:01.000 Yeah, that guy's going to jail. 1.00

00:25:02.000 That dude's going straight to jail.

00:25:04.000 They probably found him.

00:25:05.000 That guy. 1.00

00:25:06.000 Yeah, you're fucked, buddy. 1.00

00:25:07.000 Them three. 1.00

00:25:08.000 Ah, them four.

00:25:09.000 Ah, little pack.

00:25:10.000 That dude's looking sideways. 0.99

00:25:12.000 He's like, what the fuck is going on? 0.97

00:25:17.000 One dude's just like, hey man, they finna arrest me. 0.99

00:25:20.000 You know they're right, cause we not crying. 0.91

00:25:22.000 Look at how they got old ass cars too. 0.90

00:25:24.000 They're taking them around like a 1979 Lincoln. 0.95

00:25:27.000 Look at that car. 0.96

00:25:29.000 That's ridiculous. 0.97

00:25:30.000 Can you imagine? 1.00

00:25:31.000 What?

00:25:32.000 That's probably the best cars they have over there.

00:25:34.000 Like they're not inventing cars over there, right?

00:25:37.000 I don't think they get them. 1.00

00:25:38.000 That is an old ass fucking car. 1.00

00:25:40.000 I had this lady, Yeonmi Park, and she escaped from North Korea when she was 13 years old. 1.00

00:25:46.000 Made it to China.

00:25:47.000 It's a terrifying story.

00:25:49.000 Terrifying story.

00:25:50.000 She was basically sold into sex slavery. 1.00

00:25:53.000 So was her mother.

00:25:54.000 She was 13. Made her way through China and eventually got to Europe and eventually got to South Korea.

00:26:00.000 South Korea eventually got to Europe and then to America.

00:26:03.000 But it's a crazy story.

00:26:04.000 Being in South Korea and going to perform for the troops when they were, they were still in an active, considered active zone.

00:26:13.000 And the bus, the bus we were on, the street was right, you could see North Korea.

00:26:20.000 You could see how their fences and all their military stuff and the guns were following the Our little van.

00:26:29.000 It's like this street.

00:26:30.000 You're going up into these mountains.

00:26:33.000 And the dude was like, yeah, they keep an eye on us and we keep an eye on them.

00:26:37.000 It's like this is the line.

00:26:39.000 And when we went to perform, it was like all these dudes were just bald-headed.

00:26:44.000 Dude, it's like, yeah, we in the field.

00:26:49.000 And in the middle of my performance, they got cut short because they had to go back out or something.

00:26:55.000 But you see the people who's in the quote-unquote going into an active zone and performing.

00:27:02.000 And this black lieutenant, she was like, thank you for coming in.

00:27:07.000 She was like, she was over this squad.

00:27:09.000 She was like a real tough lady. 1.00

00:27:12.000 She gave me this coin.

00:27:13.000 This is a combat coin.

00:27:15.000 Thank you, but we have to go.

00:27:18.000 We appreciate it.

00:27:19.000 That's how she was talking, just like that.

00:27:20.000 I'm not making fun of her voice.

00:27:23.000 She was like, appreciate you.

00:27:25.000 And they was gone. 1.00

00:27:27.000 Like, damn! 1.00

00:27:28.000 And as we was riding back, it was like, yo, man, this shit, for real. 1.00

00:27:30.000 And you see, it's like you see it on... 1.00

00:27:33.000 On the movies, but you don't ever see the actual rolls of razor wire laid on the ground and on the top and these spikes that's up and big ass guns and a tower and you can see them like, damn! 0.99

00:27:48.000 And somebody escaped, they gotta go through that type of shit. 0.99

00:27:51.000 Imagine if you were on like the Del Rio border and you see guns, like the Mexicans had guns pointed at America. 1.00

00:27:57.000 We got guns pointed at them. 0.99

00:28:00.000 How fucking strange is that area? 1.00

00:28:02.000 North Korea and South Korea is nuts. 1.00

00:28:04.000 Nuts. 1.00

00:28:05.000 That's nuts.

00:28:05.000 And one side is thriving, making great electronics.

00:28:09.000 Everyone's getting plastic surgery.

00:28:14.000 You've seen that, right?

00:28:15.000 They all get their eyes done?

00:28:17.000 They all have eyes like this.

00:28:19.000 The problem is, it's too much plastic surgery.

00:28:23.000 It's too accepted.

00:28:24.000 It's everywhere.

00:28:25.000 They do their chins. 1.00

00:28:27.000 They do all kinds of shit over there. 1.00

00:28:28.000 I think it's the number one place for plastic surgery in the world. 1.00

00:28:32.000 Is it good, though?

00:28:34.000 Have you ever seen a great facelift?

00:28:36.000 Have you ever seen somebody that had a facelift like, you know something? 1.00

00:28:40.000 That shit is good. 1.00

00:28:41.000 In person is where it's a problem, because there's so many filters on Instagram, you don't know what the fuck is going on. 1.00

00:28:46.000 You don't know. 0.95

00:28:47.000 I mean, there's Jennifer Love Hewitt, that's her name, right?

00:28:51.000 She had a video that she put up today where she was using a filter, and the filter made her lips look fat and thick, and she was just, she's like, this is crazy, like, this is not what I look like.

00:29:01.000 And she's like, In the video, she's talking.

00:29:04.000 You know what she looks like.

00:29:05.000 There's a lot of pictures of her.

00:29:06.000 But then you see this video and she's saying, this is not what I look like.

00:29:06.000 Yeah.

00:29:09.000 But these filters are available for basically anyone to use.

00:29:12.000 So if you've seen a plastic surgeon, like, look at that.

00:29:17.000 See the filter?

00:29:18.000 Big fat lips and her face is nice and smooth. 0.99

00:29:18.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:29:21.000 That's what these filters do now. 0.81

00:29:23.000 It's AI. They recognize where your lips are and they thicken them up.

00:29:28.000 They change your eyes and shit. 0.98

00:29:30.000 So if you see someone who has a really good facelift and it's on Instagram, like, see the picture on the middle picture. 0.99

00:29:35.000 That's what she actually looks like.

00:29:36.000 She's a beautiful lady, but that's what she actually looks like. 1.00

00:29:39.000 If you see some plastic surgery photos online, like, you don't know.

00:29:43.000 The thing about them is when they move. 0.96

00:29:46.000 Like when people get a lot of fillers in their face, what's weird is when they start moving, when they start talking, and this shit all looks like rubber. 0.98

00:29:53.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:29:54.000 I remember one time, I was in the Brea Improv green room, high as fuck, like way too high, like thinking, man, I might be too high to go on stage, like this is crazy. 0.97

00:30:05.000 I went way too far. 0.97

00:30:06.000 Because I was with Joey Diaz.

00:30:07.000 It just happens.

00:30:09.000 It happens.

00:30:10.000 And I'm looking up, and there's a Joan Rivers TV show on.

00:30:15.000 Joan Rivers used to have a reality show. 0.95

00:30:17.000 And this was, at the time, I mean, I don't know how far she went with plastic surgery, but I think she went back and forth with fillers and a bunch of different shit.

00:30:29.000 She had so much filler in her face that it looked like she was wearing like a rubber mask and you could see when she's moving around and talking it was it was freaking me out it was just because i was like oh no like what have you done like what do you do that's not good don't do that there's a thing about when you see them their faces move In person, 0.95

00:30:50.000 when you see someone who's got fillers and shit in their face, it doesn't move right. 0.99

00:30:54.000 It's frozen. 1.00

00:30:55.000 It's not natural. 1.00

00:30:56.000 It's like some semen and putty shit in your face. 1.00

00:31:01.000 Okay, Lil' Kim is not the ultimate. 1.00

00:31:05.000 None of these people right now are the ultimate. 0.99

00:31:08.000 To me, Michael Jackson was the fucking problem to me. 0.99

00:31:15.000 Yeah, that's when you go too far. 1.00

00:31:17.000 It was no way for me not to be insecure growing up if Michael Jackson was fucking with his face. 0.99

00:31:28.000 Like, this is who I'm, I'm like, this is Michael Jackson. 0.99

00:31:31.000 Right.

00:31:32.000 And I think Michael Jackson looked better than me at this time. 0.99

00:31:37.000 I'm like, shit, I'm a young kid, you know. 0.99

00:31:39.000 If Michael would have stayed regular Michael, then I probably would have been like, you know, all my shit is cool. 0.99

00:31:47.000 And eventually I got there, but it was after years of thinking, nah, Well, I need to be there. 0.92

00:31:53.000 My daddy, seeing my dad when he got older, my dad was like, look, this is how a man's supposed to look. 0.82

00:31:58.000 You're supposed to have character.

00:32:00.000 All these wrinkles add character to your face. 1.00

00:32:03.000 Everything's supposed to be right on your goddamn face. 0.99

00:32:06.000 And so I stopped. 0.99

00:32:08.000 It's like going to get an edge up from a barber and they constantly trying to make both the sides of your head even and they keep pushing this side back to try to make this side. 0.99

00:32:19.000 Eventually, both of your shit is too wide and you're like, What the fuck is wrong with my forehead? 0.98

00:32:25.000 Because somebody's trying to take something that's not even and try to make it even. 0.99

00:32:31.000 Like, no, just edge it like it goes.

00:32:33.000 If it slopes up and gets wider, cool!

00:32:35.000 That's how my face works.

00:32:37.000 But I can't...

00:32:40.000 You can't cut...

00:32:42.000 Like, your beard wouldn't match...

00:32:46.000 My beard wouldn't match your face.

00:32:47.000 If they took my beard and put it in your face, you'd have a huge open spot.

00:32:52.000 Like, I do. 0.99

00:32:52.000 Like, my beard is like the goddamn Fiji's. 0.99

00:32:56.000 You see a lot of dudes who get beard transplants now? 0.99

00:33:00.000 So, I don't trust no person. 1.00

00:33:02.000 If you would paint some shit on... 0.99

00:33:03.000 Have you seen James Brown that covers the sports on... 1.00

00:33:08.000 He has... 1.00

00:33:09.000 Like, the shit is not even natural, James. 1.00

00:33:11.000 Like, it's like black paint on your goddamn skin that you edged up. 1.00

00:33:16.000 A lot of people are doing that now. 0.99

00:33:18.000 And then that's the beard...

00:33:20.000 The beard thing is weird though.

00:33:22.000 Man.

00:33:23.000 Painting your face like that. 0.94

00:33:24.000 No, tattooing your head.

00:33:25.000 That's weird too.

00:33:26.000 It's weird.

00:33:27.000 Tattooing where it just looked like a hair follicle in your head.

00:33:31.000 That's a thing that a lot of people are doing now.

00:33:34.000 But why?

00:33:35.000 It's like woman's plastic surgery. 1.00

00:33:37.000 I saw one where it was old.

00:33:39.000 Where he had been in the sun too long and it sort of faded and spread out.

00:33:45.000 So instead of being tiny little dots, They spread out because like look at my tattoos like they get the lines get thicker Yeah, because they get exposed to the Sun and the ink sort of spreads out That's what happens to the dots in your head So it was like his whole head was like a blur instead of like being crisp little dots Everything was like blurry Faded and it was it looked like madness.

00:34:06.000 So what have you done to your head?

00:34:08.000 so He has a bad Mexican prison tattoo on his head. 0.80

00:34:15.000 Dang, yes! 0.92

00:34:15.000 Oh my god. 0.92

00:34:17.000 Is that real?

00:34:18.000 James Brown need to cut it off and that mustache. 1.00

00:34:21.000 Like, cut the shit, James. 1.00

00:34:23.000 Whoa, that's real? 1.00

00:34:24.000 That's crazy.

00:34:27.000 Why James Brown just can't have his regular... 0.98

00:34:29.000 Just shave your head, bro. 0.61

00:34:31.000 Take it from a guy with a bald head. 0.98

00:34:34.000 He's got a good-shaped head.

00:34:35.000 Take it from two guys.

00:34:36.000 Two guys with a bald head.

00:34:38.000 That's a good-shaped head.

00:34:40.000 He's got a decent head.

00:34:42.000 These guys with weird heads, like flat back, when the back of their head's flat, I feel bad for them.

00:34:47.000 That's a sad look.

00:34:49.000 Yeah.

00:34:52.000 And guys who got the pug head.

00:34:55.000 Like, you got a pug head. 0.77

00:34:56.000 A pug?

00:34:57.000 Yeah, you know, like...

00:34:58.000 Oh, yeah, like the wrinkly...

00:34:59.000 Maybe James Brown got meat on the back of his head.

00:35:04.000 I don't know.

00:35:04.000 But the front of your head has nothing to do with the back, James.

00:35:07.000 They looking at you from the front.

00:35:09.000 Because I think Big Daddy Kane got that on the back of his head.

00:35:14.000 Or some people may have...

00:35:15.000 It's like a... 0.94

00:35:17.000 Hair follicle disease thing, like where you get these balls and it explodes in the back. 1.00

00:35:23.000 Oh yeah, I've seen that, yeah. 0.95

00:35:25.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:35:26.000 Yeah, your hair follicles get infected or something.

00:35:28.000 They swell up.

00:35:29.000 I think you can get that done.

00:35:31.000 I think you can get something done about that.

00:35:32.000 The hair transplant on the face is weird, like when dudes get a beard transplant.

00:35:36.000 I've seen a lot of that on Instagram.

00:35:38.000 It's like, come on, man.

00:35:39.000 You just got to accept your beard.

00:35:40.000 It is what it is, man.

00:35:42.000 This is eight years of strong growth, like oil and everything.

00:35:51.000 You can catch me by 3 o'clock if you chose to.

00:35:55.000 Your beard is way more...

00:35:57.000 You can cut yours off and surpass me in a month.

00:36:01.000 This is like two days, I think.

00:36:03.000 I think this is two days.

00:36:05.000 It might be three.

00:36:06.000 What's Wednesday?

00:36:07.000 It might be three.

00:36:08.000 I think I shaved Monday morning.

00:36:09.000 If I shave my beard right now and I come back next year, it'll just be getting to it.

00:36:18.000 Really?

00:36:20.000 Why do people care about that though? 0.73

00:36:22.000 Beards a weird one like dudes who can't grow beard like dudes who have beards or can grow beards a lot of times They just shave it but dudes who can't grow beards they want a fucking beard It's like being a kid like I shaved my face very early when I was a kid like I would just put the soap on there and I'll shave off the soap and I had nothing Because my dad, 0.92

00:36:42.000 thick face, beard. 0.76

00:36:43.000 My dad had the big, thick Whispers mustache.

00:36:48.000 Scotty from the Whispers.

00:36:52.000 And man, he looked so deaf in there.

00:36:56.000 When he would cut his face off and then he would have just his mustache and then he would just, ah, I'm going to do the beard.

00:37:03.000 I'm going to do the goatee.

00:37:04.000 It's like you had so much stuff he could do.

00:37:06.000 He could look different all the time.

00:37:08.000 But me, it's just one naked face look.

00:37:12.000 Then I got the Fiji Islands.

00:37:14.000 I remember this lady in the airport saying, you know how you have your beard design with a little swoop in it?

00:37:22.000 I'm like, no, that's like an open space, man.

00:37:26.000 It's like it doesn't grow.

00:37:28.000 That's barren land.

00:37:30.000 Yeah, thank you for the compliment of my insecurities.

00:37:35.000 It's a thumbprint, man.

00:37:36.000 I can't...

00:37:37.000 And this side, it's not any better.

00:37:40.000 It just connects thinner back in my face.

00:37:45.000 I think Floyd Mayweather got a face transplant.

00:37:48.000 I think he got a hair transplant on his cheeks.

00:37:51.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:37:52.000 Oh, shit, Floyd. 0.99

00:37:52.000 See that? 0.99

00:37:59.000 Because it wasn't until he was like 40 years old that all of a sudden he had a beard.

00:38:03.000 Like he always had, you know, like a little goatee, but he never had a beard.

00:38:10.000 And now he went to Turkey, I think.

00:38:13.000 They do a lot of them for some reason.

00:38:14.000 They do a lot of them in Turkey.

00:38:18.000 Because they do them for the low.

00:38:21.000 And they do a, what is it called?

00:38:24.000 Because my dude, one of my friends went over to Turkey and got his hair trimmed. 0.99

00:38:27.000 And he'd still think that shit would look good. 0.99

00:38:29.000 I'd be like... 1.00

00:38:30.000 Why do they do it so much in Turkey?

00:38:33.000 Istanbul'd and bullshitted you. 0.99

00:38:36.000 That's what I don't understand. 0.99

00:38:37.000 Why would it be worth going all the way the fuck over there to do it?

00:38:41.000 I don't know. 0.89

00:38:42.000 I guess maybe you could hide while you're recovering.

00:38:44.000 Yeah, maybe don't nobody know you in Turkey.

00:38:46.000 Yeah, you can sneak around. 0.99

00:38:48.000 But, like, women who get the butt transplants or the tits and all this shit done to you, why travel to a foreign place and get it done instead? 1.00

00:39:02.000 Generally because it's cheaper. 0.99

00:39:03.000 Like, I don't understand botched.

00:39:05.000 Like, why not just go...

00:39:08.000 Oh, this is why.

00:39:09.000 Average cost of beard transplant in Turkey is $1,900, which is a cheap option compared to other countries.

00:39:16.000 That's why.

00:39:17.000 Beard transplant in Turkey is very popular for people from abroad.

00:39:21.000 Because it's impossible to get the best beard transplant results at an affordable price in Turkey.

00:39:25.000 Oh, okay.

00:39:25.000 Can we just do a little math?

00:39:29.000 Okay.

00:39:30.000 So we had $1,900 U.S. dollars.

00:39:33.000 Compared to $15,000 normally.

00:39:36.000 But that's like, what about travel? 0.99

00:39:38.000 What about all that shit? 0.99

00:39:39.000 Yeah, that's why I was going to do some math. 0.99

00:39:41.000 What about travel?

00:39:42.000 How many days you have to stay?

00:39:43.000 What about lodging? 0.99

00:39:44.000 Now, this shit can sum up to about $15,000 if you've got to do all the rest of that. 0.99

00:39:51.000 I don't know why they do it in Turkey, though. 0.99

00:39:53.000 Are they just really good at it over there?

00:39:54.000 Is Turkey good for hair transplant?

00:39:56.000 Click on that.

00:39:56.000 Maybe they're using the Turkish hair.

00:39:59.000 Turkey's become a top... 0.97

00:40:01.000 But they can't.

00:40:01.000 They have to use your own hair.

00:40:03.000 Your body will reject it if it's not your hair.

00:40:06.000 It's the same way with hair transplants.

00:40:08.000 It's the same as organ transplants.

00:40:09.000 If you take an organ from somebody else, you have to take...

00:40:13.000 I have a friend who had a heart transplant.

00:40:14.000 And he has to take all kinds of crazy medication to keep his body from rejecting the heart transplant.

00:40:21.000 Like, his body is very immunocompromised.

00:40:24.000 Because this stuff that he's taking actually suppresses his immune system so that his body accepts the heart transplant.

00:40:32.000 Yeah, it's heavy duty. 0.99

00:40:32.000 Damn! 0.99

00:40:34.000 It's heavy duty shit. 1.00

00:40:37.000 It's changed his personality, changed his whole life. 1.00

00:40:41.000 Do you know C.T. Fletcher?

00:40:43.000 Do you know who he is?

00:40:44.000 Yes.

00:40:45.000 Very inspirational way of lifting.

00:40:46.000 Yeah, bodybuilding.

00:40:48.000 C.T. Fletcher.

00:40:48.000 That's him.

00:40:49.000 C.T. Fletcher had a woman's heart transplanted into his body.

00:40:54.000 Damn! 1.00

00:40:55.000 Yeah, so he's got a woman's heart in his body. 1.00

00:40:58.000 I used to watch his bodybuilding thing because he would...

00:41:04.000 Ballbenders, I think it was called. 1.00

00:41:06.000 He had a bunch of dudes.

00:41:07.000 Iron addicts.

00:41:08.000 Yeah, a bunch of dudes on there. 1.00

00:41:10.000 They was huge.

00:41:12.000 Oh, yeah.

00:41:12.000 No, C.T. was a gigantic man when he was younger.

00:41:15.000 And I always wondered, C.T. Fletcher?

00:41:19.000 Look at that image, the one right next to that one.

00:41:22.000 The size of a man.

00:41:22.000 Look at that.

00:41:24.000 And he told me he only used steroids once in his career, and he said he didn't like it because it killed his dick. 0.99

00:41:31.000 Killed his hard-ons, so this is all natural. 0.99

00:41:34.000 It's all natural and hard work.

00:41:36.000 Very inspirational dude, but since having the heart transplant, he's not just inspirational, but he's really compassionate and kind, and he just has a second lease on life, and so he treats everything differently.

00:41:50.000 Is he smaller?

00:41:51.000 He's pretty big.

00:41:52.000 He's still pretty big. 1.00

00:41:54.000 He's fucking jack still. 0.99

00:41:55.000 But now he's on a vegan diet. 1.00

00:41:58.000 All he eats is vegan food.

00:41:59.000 He thinks that's going to help his heart situation.

00:42:04.000 But it's, you know, your body doesn't want another person's organ in there.

00:42:09.000 So I think that's the same thing with hair.

00:42:09.000 It's tough.

00:42:11.000 I think if somebody tried to donate their hair to you, I don't think your body would accept it.

00:42:15.000 It's like trying to buy ladybugs to put in your garden.

00:42:21.000 That doesn't work?

00:42:22.000 No?

00:42:23.000 If they don't like it, they leave.

00:42:25.000 Oh, really?

00:42:26.000 Yeah, you might as well just plant fennel in your garden, because they like fennel, and they'll come.

00:42:33.000 Are you a gardener?

00:42:34.000 Yes.

00:42:35.000 Really?

00:42:36.000 What kind of stuff do you grow?

00:42:37.000 Everything.

00:42:38.000 I've tried to grow everything.

00:42:38.000 Really?

00:42:40.000 I'm great with okra, tomatoes, me and tomatoes have it.

00:42:45.000 And it's not me and the tomatoes, it's the environment.

00:42:48.000 In Texas, in certain areas, I didn't know, once you garden, you learn more about bugs.

00:42:55.000 Because you have to. 1.00

00:42:57.000 Because bugs destroy your goddamn garden. 1.00

00:43:00.000 Like a caterpillar, what my house was. 1.00

00:43:05.000 So I'm building, I got this garden, it's like 60 feet.

00:43:08.000 Of just straight vegetables.

00:43:11.000 Onions, carrots.

00:43:13.000 Carrots are in the bucket trying to do them on the ground.

00:43:15.000 I have okra, squash, celery.

00:43:18.000 Got a lot of stuff out there.

00:43:20.000 Onions, everything.

00:43:23.000 It's a migration of these worms.

00:43:28.000 They come through and they trying to nest, turn into whatever moths or whatever they're going to turn into.

00:43:33.000 Chaterpillars?

00:43:34.000 So they come through In like a wave.

00:43:39.000 They hanging from the houses everywhere. 1.00

00:43:43.000 And they eat your whole goddamn garden up. 1.00

00:43:46.000 They eat everything in their path besides grass. 1.00

00:43:51.000 It's insane. 1.00

00:43:53.000 So you go out there one day, you have a perfectly functioning garden, then you go out in the middle of the night and your shit is nothing. 0.99

00:44:00.000 And you're like, what the fuck just happened? 0.99

00:44:00.000 Really? 0.99

00:44:03.000 Then it's these little worms that it's a larva that this certain moth lays on the back of your leaf. 1.00

00:44:14.000 And that shit eats all your leaves up out of nowhere. 0.99

00:44:18.000 Then it's these, then it's snails. 1.00

00:44:22.000 You think snails like, but snails are up. 1.00

00:44:25.000 Snails are the worst thing to have in the garden because they're going to destroy this shit. 0.99

00:44:30.000 They eat holes through, like, you just start fucking hating insects because you're trying to grow something and you try not to use pesticides to put chemicals on your food so you have to get things. 1.00

00:44:41.000 Like ladybugs. 1.00

00:44:43.000 Ladybugs kick other insects' ass and you don't know that. 1.00

00:44:47.000 Like they gangsters. 1.00

00:44:50.000 Ladybugs are gangsters. 1.00

00:44:52.000 And you get them and it's these particular little haunted wasps that eat these worms and you want dragonflies and you want...

00:45:06.000 You want birds.

00:45:08.000 You need birds to eat mosquitoes and flies to keep from around your garden.

00:45:13.000 But then they're going to eat some of the ladybugs. 1.00

00:45:16.000 This is a whole balance of nature.

00:45:20.000 And then you've got to learn how things grow.

00:45:22.000 Corn is a freaky vegetable.

00:45:25.000 It's a freaky starch.

00:45:27.000 Corn, you have to plant it close because it likes bumping up against each other.

00:45:34.000 Okra, not so much.

00:45:36.000 You can plant okra separate because of how it grows.

00:45:40.000 Cucumbers and squash, they bud.

00:45:43.000 And then you gotta know, you can eat the flowers. 0.99

00:45:46.000 It's all type of shit with gardening, man. 0.98

00:45:48.000 How long have you been doing this? 0.99

00:45:50.000 Probably, I don't count as a kid because that was my grandmother's garden.

00:45:55.000 So I've been gardening on my own for about, I'm gonna say about eight years.

00:45:59.000 So is this a trial and error?

00:46:01.000 Like you started off slow?

00:46:02.000 Everything is trial and error when you got it.

00:46:04.000 Because you got to call people.

00:46:05.000 See, this is another thing about community.

00:46:09.000 If everybody in your community is growing something, you're going to talk to each other.

00:46:15.000 You're going to talk to each other about growing.

00:46:19.000 I can go to a place...

00:46:23.000 Like, if I go to a nursery, I'm going to ask somebody what they're going to do with that.

00:46:28.000 Like, what you playing with that?

00:46:30.000 Like, how you grow that?

00:46:31.000 I'm going to ask.

00:46:32.000 And they're going to say, what you got going on?

00:46:34.000 I've seen people...

00:46:36.000 Making relationships out of just trading vegetables.

00:46:39.000 Hey, you grow, you got enough room to grow sweet potatoes.

00:46:42.000 I can grow purple whole peas.

00:46:45.000 Let's switch that out.

00:46:47.000 Let's trade that.

00:46:49.000 And then we all can grow cucumbers and all these other things.

00:46:52.000 But for some reason, you're the only one having success with the sweet potatoes.

00:46:57.000 So I invest in you growing sweet potatoes.

00:47:00.000 Like I grew watermelon one year.

00:47:02.000 And I thought I was doing pretty good.

00:47:06.000 I had one good watermelon and like six bad ones because I didn't know that you had to put hay up under them once they start growing or they can rot at the bottom.

00:47:19.000 How I find that out, I call my boy Raphael.

00:47:22.000 He lives in Shreveport, Louisiana.

00:47:23.000 I call him.

00:47:24.000 I say, man, I'm having a hard time with these watermelons.

00:47:28.000 What you doing?

00:47:29.000 Talk to me.

00:47:30.000 And then we on FaceTime, and he has a grocery store in the back of his.

00:47:34.000 He's been growing for years.

00:47:36.000 So his tomatoes are huge.

00:47:39.000 He got a lot of stuff going on.

00:47:41.000 It's crazy.

00:47:42.000 Tomatoes taste way better from a garden.

00:47:45.000 They're not even the same thing. 0.99

00:47:46.000 I guarantee you, if one day you had time and say, hey, let's go to Shreveport and go to Raphael's backyard, you would just sit back there and just eat shit just out. 0.98

00:47:59.000 Right off the vine. 0.99

00:48:00.000 Just let me wash it off.

00:48:01.000 Boom.

00:48:04.000 And I didn't even know how many types of tomatoes there were, even though I love tomatoes.

00:48:09.000 And when you grow them, how they grow.

00:48:12.000 These grow at this time.

00:48:15.000 It's insane.

00:48:16.000 But when you're growing something, you care a lot about your soil and what's in it and how it's growing.

00:48:24.000 Do you compost?

00:48:25.000 Yes.

00:48:26.000 Do you?

00:48:26.000 Yeah.

00:48:27.000 And you got to know that you don't want no bull manure in there.

00:48:31.000 You just want only cow manure, calf manure. 0.80

00:48:33.000 Really?

00:48:33.000 Yeah.

00:48:34.000 Because there's no nutrients in bull shit. 1.00

00:48:38.000 What? 1.00

00:48:39.000 Really? 1.00

00:48:40.000 Oh, is that why it's bullshit? 1.00

00:48:41.000 Yeah, it's why it's bullshit. 1.00

00:48:42.000 Oh, wow. 1.00

00:48:45.000 But you knew that.

00:48:47.000 No, I didn't know that.

00:48:48.000 Cow manure.

00:48:49.000 If somebody's trying to sell you something and it has just cow manure mixed with dirt, that's good.

00:48:54.000 That's good go. 1.00

00:48:55.000 But if it got bullshit in it, Wow, that's why it's bullshit. 1.00

00:49:02.000 That's why bullshit is bullshit. 1.00

00:49:04.000 Wow. 1.00

00:49:04.000 I've never grown a successful yard with horse manure. 1.00

00:49:10.000 Maybe that's like men's shit versus women's shit. 1.00

00:49:13.000 Because if a woman shits and you walk in the bathroom and it blows out the bathroom where a dude shits, like I can tell if a dude shit or a woman shit. 1.00

00:49:22.000 Pretty much. 1.00

00:49:23.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:49:24.000 You know, I'm not normal, like some shits are not that bad. 0.99

00:49:27.000 Some shits are like medium, like regular, even my own. 0.99

00:49:30.000 But sometimes I take a shit and I don't realize how bad it is because I'm in there with it. 1.00

00:49:34.000 And then I'll go outside and then I have to come back in the bathroom like, what the fuck? 1.00

00:49:44.000 Because I'm in here with it. 0.99

00:49:46.000 I've been nose blind.

00:49:48.000 That's the thing about smelling things.

00:49:50.000 You get accustomed to smells.

00:49:52.000 Your olfactory senses detect changes in smells.

00:49:55.000 That's what it's good for.

00:49:57.000 That's why people that live in areas that stink don't realize that the area stinks.

00:50:00.000 People live near a factory or something like that.

00:50:02.000 They have no idea.

00:50:03.000 Do you get there? 1.00

00:50:04.000 Are y'all living around this shit? 1.00

00:50:07.000 In Amarillo, Texas, when I was in prison, They have this distinct smell. 1.00

00:50:14.000 If anybody lives in Amarillo, they know this goddamn, it's a slaughterhouse. 0.99

00:50:18.000 Oh, that's the worst. 1.00

00:50:19.000 And it's a, it just, it is the stinkiest shit in the, like, goddamn. 1.00

00:50:27.000 My parents used to live in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, and I used to have to drive to visit them. 1.00

00:50:31.000 I'd come from New York to visit them, and I'd go through this area of Pennsylvania that's all slaughterhouses.

00:50:36.000 It's all, like, cattle, slaughterhouses, and it's just a thick smell of death.

00:50:43.000 It's like a ripe...

00:50:46.000 It's a stench.

00:50:48.000 It's the best word for it.

00:50:50.000 It's a stench of death.

00:50:52.000 It just doesn't smell good. 1.00

00:50:53.000 And these fucking poor people live there. 1.00

00:50:55.000 There's a lot of houses around this slaughterhouse. 1.00

00:50:59.000 Folks that work at the slaughterhouse, they have to live in that area.

00:51:01.000 It's everywhere.

00:51:04.000 It's got to be in your breath.

00:51:06.000 As you're breathing it in and breathing out, you're taking in those little tiny stench molecules.

00:51:16.000 Just the fact of the stitch molecule. 1.00

00:51:19.000 That is crazy about bullshit. 1.00

00:51:20.000 I need to know why bullshit is bullshit. 1.00

00:51:23.000 I wonder what it is. 1.00

00:51:25.000 But I think it has to do with, like I said, a man smell. 1.00

00:51:28.000 My wife's shit, I'm sure it doesn't smell good. 1.00

00:51:31.000 I'm sure it doesn't smell good. 1.00

00:51:33.000 But I've never smelled one of her shits where I confused it from mine. 1.00

00:51:37.000 Damn. 1.00

00:51:38.000 You know what I mean? 1.00

00:51:39.000 I lived in a house with women growing up. 1.00

00:51:42.000 And that's why I'm so particular about the scent of a woman. 1.00

00:51:46.000 Like, I know I'm not supposed to smell you.

00:51:48.000 Like, nothing that you do, I'm not supposed to smell it.

00:51:51.000 Because I never smelled my mom, my sisters, my aunts, my cousins.

00:51:56.000 I know my boy cousins.

00:51:58.000 Like you say, I know my boy cousins around. 1.00

00:52:00.000 Them motherfuckers smell like outside and play and just, you gotta reek to you. 1.00

00:52:06.000 But the women in my family are very particular about how they operate. 1.00

00:52:13.000 So, I think I'd break up with you if I ever smelled...

00:52:21.000 You do a number two as a woman. 1.00

00:52:22.000 I think my fucking opinion about you just instantly changes. 1.00

00:52:28.000 I can see a woman, Joe, this is dead ass where I am. 1.00

00:52:34.000 I can see a woman who physically looks very, very fucking attractive. 1.00

00:52:39.000 Her shape is, she got all the shit I like. 1.00

00:52:41.000 Ass bouncing, all her shit. 1.00

00:52:42.000 If I look down and I see dirt on your heel, the heel of your foot, You automatically have a fucking yeast infection to me. 1.00

00:52:54.000 Like, automatically. 1.00

00:52:55.000 Like, if your fucking nail polish is chipped on your hands, you automatically got a fucking yeast infection. 1.00

00:53:01.000 Like, everything about you becomes disgusting because it's shit that... 1.00

00:53:04.000 I just don't deem womanly. 1.00

00:53:07.000 Like, you not supposed to have fucking dirt on your heel or your foot. 1.00

00:53:11.000 Like, what the fuck are you doing that you don't... 1.00

00:53:13.000 Like, flip-flop dust is on the heel of your fucking foot. 1.00

00:53:17.000 All your toes might as well be dirty. 1.00

00:53:19.000 You're a fucking lot lizard. 1.00

00:53:21.000 Out of nowhere, you're a fucking prostitute. 1.00

00:53:24.000 I just deem you fucking reek. 1.00

00:53:26.000 You ever see Dave's bit that he does about liking dirty white strippers with dirty feet? 1.00

00:53:33.000 Mm-mm. 0.99

00:53:34.000 He said he was going to open up.

00:53:37.000 He likes hippies. 1.00

00:53:38.000 He said he likes hippies with dirty feet. 0.99

00:53:41.000 He's just joking around, right? 0.98

00:53:43.000 It's just a joke.

00:53:44.000 But he's like, if I open up a strip club, that's what it's going to be.

00:53:44.000 It's a bit.

00:53:48.000 There's going to be a pile of dirt right next to the stage.

00:53:50.000 You've got to step in that dirt before you get up there.

00:53:52.000 He's going to call them strippies.

00:53:56.000 You know, as you grow older, or you see things, your tastes change. 0.98

00:54:04.000 Like, I've only been with black women. 1.00

00:54:10.000 So I don't have any other experiences to go on.

00:54:13.000 You know how some people are like, white women are better in relationships or Asian women. 1.00

00:54:19.000 I don't know that to be true.

00:54:21.000 I've only been with black women. 1.00

00:54:24.000 I've only been in whether a good situation or indifferent situation or a very difficult situation.

00:54:31.000 Only my kind. 0.85

00:54:33.000 so which i just i'm a human being i just love human beings period but i never looked at gothic girls before but i love them when i see them like i like i just white makeup the whole deal the black mascara tattoos and all that i don't know why But I am fucking intrigued. 0.94

00:54:59.000 If I see a gothic girl, I'm like, I be fucking... 1.00

00:55:01.000 If you got an exposed tattoo and you fucking look gothic, my eyebrow goes up. 1.00

00:55:08.000 And I know I done got bad, bad with this shit now. 0.99

00:55:11.000 Because I was in... 0.99

00:55:12.000 And these girls probably never even know that this happened. 1.00

00:55:16.000 They probably never even told their friends.

00:55:18.000 So I'm doing a stress factory in...

00:55:22.000 New Jersey?

00:55:23.000 In New Jersey.

00:55:23.000 New Brunswick?

00:55:24.000 New Brunswick.

00:55:25.000 It's a little restaurant, a little Hispanic restaurant, Latino restaurant right on that street, a cantina.

00:55:34.000 They got pretty good margaritas and they got good shrimp tacos.

00:55:37.000 So I go in there, I'm sitting at the bar by myself getting ready to go to my hotel.

00:55:40.000 And, you know, somebody do some birthday shots.

00:55:43.000 I turn around, and it's like six white girls at a table. 0.96

00:55:49.000 It's somebody's birthday.

00:55:51.000 And I just glanced.

00:55:52.000 I'm like, oh, they're having a birthday.

00:55:54.000 And then I glanced back.

00:55:58.000 It's six gothic white girls. 0.98

00:56:03.000 Oh, my God!

00:56:04.000 I was like...

00:56:06.000 Okay, let me compose myself.

00:56:08.000 And I just kept looking.

00:56:10.000 Just kept looking.

00:56:11.000 And I was looking at the different levels of the gothicness to them.

00:56:11.000 I'm like...

00:56:15.000 I was like, damn. 0.99

00:56:17.000 And then this one blonde one got up to go to the restroom and she was so gothic. 1.00

00:56:22.000 The big shoes and shit and everything. 0.99

00:56:25.000 And I said to myself... 0.99

00:56:28.000 I could send a round of drinks to them.

00:56:31.000 Because that's what a man would do.

00:56:32.000 It was a bunch of gorgeous chicks. 1.00

00:56:36.000 Oh, let me send them around just to be impressive.

00:56:39.000 That's not what I did.

00:56:41.000 I got ready to go.

00:56:43.000 I ate my food.

00:56:43.000 Contained myself.

00:56:44.000 I ate my food. 0.91

00:56:45.000 Because all these goth girls. 1.00

00:56:46.000 Because they goth.

00:56:47.000 I was just thinking they were the best.

00:56:49.000 And I just walked over.

00:56:51.000 I don't know what their bill was.

00:56:52.000 And I just put some money down.

00:56:54.000 And said, happy birthday.

00:56:57.000 And walked out.

00:56:59.000 And I walked to my room.

00:57:01.000 And they were very appreciative of all at the same time.

00:57:04.000 They said, oh, thank you.

00:57:05.000 Because, you know, once all the money, it was enough to pay for what they had.

00:57:12.000 But I know that I'm shifting towards gothic girls.

00:57:18.000 You're shifting?

00:57:19.000 Yeah.

00:57:19.000 What started this?

00:57:21.000 I have no idea.

00:57:22.000 It probably started with the chubby, not overweight, but the chubby White cheerleader, like the third, like when you watch softball, when you watch softball, it's the third baseman. 1.00

00:57:22.000 Out of nowhere? 1.00

00:57:38.000 Like whatever she, third baseman always kind of stout, little heavy, heavy one. 1.00

00:57:43.000 I think it started with that.

00:57:43.000 Yeah.

00:57:45.000 And they're like, hmm.

00:57:48.000 Interesting.

00:57:49.000 You know, so.

00:57:50.000 And you just developed a taste?

00:57:51.000 Yeah, never been with it.

00:57:53.000 But you're interested.

00:57:53.000 Right, but.

00:57:55.000 I'm very, Intriguing.

00:57:58.000 Charitable to people.

00:58:00.000 Like, I'm the person that if you behind me and you buying something, I'd be in that mood.

00:58:08.000 I'm like, yo, whatever they getting, I got.

00:58:11.000 Because, you know, I used to be trying to pay back the universe.

00:58:13.000 But then I used to be very particular about who I used to do that with.

00:58:17.000 Now it's opened up to gothic girls. 1.00

00:58:19.000 It used to be old people, children, very, very attractive black women. 1.00

00:58:25.000 And now it's opened up to gothic girls. 0.98

00:58:28.000 That's how I know.

00:58:29.000 If you gothic and you standing behind me in line, you're going to get something paid for. 0.99

00:58:32.000 So is it just a mystery to you?

00:58:36.000 I don't know.

00:58:36.000 Is it just intriguing?

00:58:38.000 It's like old white women with a certain haircut. 1.00

00:58:42.000 Their ass has dropped like it's finally... 1.00

00:58:45.000 They old. 1.00

00:58:46.000 They like maybe 60. And that's who women need to be careful of. 1.00

00:58:50.000 Old, white, well-to-do women... 1.00

00:58:54.000 You think that young women want to steal your man. 0.94

00:58:58.000 Yes, they want to take your man and have a life with him. 1.00

00:59:00.000 The danger in old women, they don't even want your man. 1.00

00:59:04.000 They want to use him as a toy for a couple of hours and toss him back to you.

00:59:08.000 They don't even want him.

00:59:09.000 So you got to be scheduled.

00:59:12.000 This old white lady told me that, hey, what would it cost for your time? 0.92

00:59:17.000 I was like, man.

00:59:18.000 Cost for your time?

00:59:19.000 Really?

00:59:20.000 And she wasn't even talking about paying me.

00:59:22.000 He was like, you know.

00:59:23.000 What's the price of your time?

00:59:24.000 What do you need to do?

00:59:26.000 Like, you need to go somewhere.

00:59:28.000 She want to take you somewhere? 0.99

00:59:30.000 Man, I'm like, I'm not available to be out.

00:59:34.000 And then she came around.

00:59:38.000 They pulled her car around and she was like in a Maserati truck.

00:59:45.000 I'm like, I'm going to come back to your show tomorrow.

00:59:50.000 Zoomed out. 0.99

00:59:50.000 I'm like, damn! 0.99

00:59:52.000 I could be some old white lady's pool boy that gets left in the wheel. 0.99

00:59:59.000 Yeah, I wonder how many of those are there.

01:00:01.000 Because you know there's a lot of sugar daddies and girls who get paid. 1.00

01:00:05.000 There's a lot of that.

01:00:06.000 There's a lot of rich guys, have girls, they pay for their apartment, buy them a car.

01:00:10.000 Remember that dude? 0.98

01:00:11.000 Who was the dude, the fuck is his name, that owned the Clippers? 0.96

01:00:16.000 Yeah. 0.99

01:00:17.000 He had a deal, right?

01:00:18.000 Yeah.

01:00:19.000 Yes, that guy.

01:00:20.000 He had that girl. 1.00

01:00:23.000 All the shit went down with him. 1.00

01:00:25.000 He had a deal with her. 1.00

01:00:26.000 He bought her a Ferrari, got her a Bentley, bought her a condo.

01:00:30.000 It's a lot of women got that deal. 1.00

01:00:32.000 Yeah, a lot of women got that deal, but not a lot of dudes got that deal. 1.00

01:00:34.000 Nah, shit. 1.00

01:00:35.000 A lot of dudes do not get their shit paid for by some rich lady that they fuck. 1.00

01:00:38.000 That's rare. 1.00

01:00:39.000 I just want some old white lady to come give me a Rolex and say, this is for your time. 1.00

01:00:46.000 Yeah.

01:00:51.000 I don't know.

01:00:52.000 I don't think I could be a gigolo.

01:00:55.000 You gotta touch everybody. 0.98

01:01:00.000 I had a lady who did porno and she told me that. 0.93

01:01:03.000 She said, porno is not all people think it is. 1.00

01:01:06.000 That shit is... 1.00

01:01:09.000 Like, you gotta do things. 1.00

01:01:11.000 And sometimes these girls' body don't be fucking right. 1.00

01:01:15.000 Like, they be having odors and shit. 0.99

01:01:18.000 It's like me being in the strip club. 0.99

01:01:21.000 I'm the person that's going to...

01:01:23.000 I go to a strip club in Houston only, really, to pay homage to the streets.

01:01:29.000 You know, just to, you know, do something for the streets.

01:01:33.000 But...

01:01:34.000 I don't want you dancing on me.

01:01:36.000 Like, you can dance while I can see you, but I don't want you actually on me.

01:01:42.000 Like, don't be on me.

01:01:44.000 Yeah, like, don't sit on me.

01:01:46.000 Like, don't...

01:01:47.000 This dance right there...

01:01:49.000 You're gonna get the same money.

01:01:52.000 I'm gonna throw as much money I'm gonna throw, but I don't want you on me.

01:01:55.000 And people are like, why?

01:01:57.000 Until I go to a strip club where there's a full shower area, like the Lakers locker room. 0.95

01:02:09.000 Because that's what I would have. 1.00

01:02:10.000 If I open up a strip club, you can best believe you're going to be like the fucking Lakers. 1.00

01:02:19.000 Because you're in showtime. 1.00

01:02:20.000 The people coming to see you, cool.

01:02:22.000 Yo, man, she has a place. 0.98

01:02:27.000 She don't have a long ass table with everybody. 1.00

01:02:29.000 She has a booth. 0.95

01:02:30.000 You have the makeup lady. 1.00

01:02:32.000 You have the nutritionist back there. 1.00

01:02:34.000 You have the mom that takes care, that cleans everybody's shit. 0.99

01:02:38.000 And you have a shower area. 1.00

01:02:40.000 You have a full ass shower where you can go get your musty ass in that shower and then come back out and dance on people fresh. 1.00

01:02:48.000 I don't want you dancing on me. 1.00

01:02:49.000 You done been in this shit baby wiping yourself. 1.00

01:02:52.000 Get your ass off me. 1.00

01:02:54.000 Like, No, get the fuck out of here. 1.00

01:02:58.000 I don't want you on me. 1.00

01:02:59.000 I just don't.

01:03:00.000 That's understandable.

01:03:03.000 Why would I let you... 1.00

01:03:04.000 You done been spraying this shit on your body that you ain't bathed off and you put that shit on my clothes and I was feeling like some fucking brown... 1.00

01:03:12.000 Whatever that shit is, they body spray. 1.00

01:03:13.000 I hate that shit. 1.00

01:03:14.000 Like, don't... 1.00

01:03:15.000 I hate it. 1.00

01:03:16.000 Like, it just made me so mad just to even think of a stripper dancing on me and you haven't taken a fucking shower and you've been in this strip club for hours dancing on various people Oh, hell no. 1.00

01:03:29.000 Just to disgust it alone. 0.99

01:03:31.000 But I would have to have a shower for my strippers, for my dancers, for the league. 0.78

01:03:37.000 I would call them the league.

01:03:38.000 The league?

01:03:40.000 If you're dancing at my club, you can definitely hold yourself over other strippers. 1.00

01:03:48.000 Like, oh, you're dancing at that club? 0.88

01:03:50.000 Oh, I'm ashamed of you. 0.86

01:03:51.000 Like, you can actually look down on other strippers. 1.00

01:03:53.000 Like, no, where you dance at?

01:03:56.000 The league.

01:03:57.000 Like, I'm with the league.

01:03:58.000 Like, I would treat you so good.

01:04:00.000 Are you gonna open up a strip club, Ali?

01:04:02.000 No, I'm not!

01:04:04.000 I feel like you have plans.

01:04:05.000 I'm not, but I'm just saying.

01:04:06.000 All gothic girls. 0.98

01:04:08.000 Oh, my God.

01:04:09.000 You know, my uncle told me this.

01:04:12.000 My uncle told me this. 1.00

01:04:13.000 He's a fucking nut. 1.00

01:04:15.000 My uncle Mac. 1.00

01:04:16.000 My uncle Mac told me, you don't want to make no goddamn money. 0.98

01:04:18.000 If you want to make some money, let me tell you what you do. 0.98

01:04:21.000 You get your house.

01:04:23.000 Six bedroom. 1.00

01:04:24.000 Put you five chubby white girls in that motherfucker. 1.00

01:04:28.000 Gold, baby. 1.00

01:04:29.000 Million dollars in a year.

01:04:31.000 I said, what?

01:04:33.000 He said, man, do you understand? 1.00

01:04:36.000 Everybody like a fat white girl. 1.00

01:04:40.000 I said, Okay. 0.98

01:04:43.000 And then if you go through, like, I watched The Best Little Whole House in Texas before I've seen that.

01:04:52.000 I can see it.

01:04:53.000 I can see it.

01:04:57.000 That's the thing, too. 1.00

01:04:59.000 That's why these people get these ass injections. 1.00

01:05:01.000 A big ass on anything. 1.00

01:05:07.000 I know this. 1.00

01:05:08.000 A bent over ass. 1.00

01:05:10.000 Nobody can pass over. 1.00

01:05:11.000 I don't give a damn how wide it is.

01:05:13.000 If it's bent over, you're like, I don't know who it belongs to, but it's decent.

01:05:20.000 Isn't it weird that that's just a genetic thing?

01:05:22.000 Your body wants someone who has an appropriate amount of fat so they can take care of your children. 1.00

01:05:29.000 That's the hip to waist ratio thing. 1.00

01:05:31.000 That's why guys like big tits. 1.00

01:05:33.000 Because it's going to be able to supply the milk for your baby. 1.00

01:05:35.000 And then a big ass is going to be like, she's got enough fat supply on her body to survive the birthing process. 1.00

01:05:43.000 I don't see the... 0.99

01:05:44.000 Isn't that wild?

01:05:44.000 It's a thing.

01:05:45.000 But it's weird that that's our urges.

01:05:47.000 Our urges come from that. 0.99

01:05:48.000 They're so easy to trick that we know it's like fake tits. 1.00

01:05:52.000 We know it's a trick. 0.94

01:05:54.000 It's not confusing, but you like them. 1.00

01:05:56.000 Like big old fake tits. 1.00

01:05:58.000 I think this is the thing with me. 0.99

01:06:01.000 I have a friend named Marcus D. Wilder.

01:06:04.000 He's another comedian.

01:06:06.000 He always say that I am the one thing man. 1.00

01:06:10.000 Like, it takes one thing for me to erase all of your shit. 1.00

01:06:14.000 Like, you could be an attractive woman and, hey, I know your tits is fake. 1.00

01:06:19.000 And it looks appealing. 0.99

01:06:22.000 And then in my mind, I know there's a scar somewhere.

01:06:26.000 What?

01:06:28.000 That bothers you? 1.00

01:06:29.000 It's a fucking butcher knife, scar down the side, or you got it cut on up under. 1.00

01:06:38.000 But then if they stuff that shit in your nipple, I'm not going to be able to do it. 1.00

01:06:43.000 I can see that bothers me. 1.00

01:06:46.000 The nipple one bothers you.

01:06:47.000 Then the feel of them.

01:06:50.000 I felt some that were the real thing, but then the scars there.

01:06:57.000 And then I felt something that was like, do you know that you have cement in your chest?

01:07:03.000 This is gravel.

01:07:05.000 It has to be gravel.

01:07:09.000 Yeah, some of them are rock hard.

01:07:10.000 That's weird. 0.99

01:07:11.000 I don't like the fake asses at all. 1.00

01:07:13.000 I just can't get into the fake ass at all. 1.00

01:07:17.000 It don't come off your thigh right. 0.99

01:07:20.000 Exactly.

01:07:21.000 It doesn't match your thighs.

01:07:22.000 It don't match nothing. 1.00

01:07:23.000 That shit is retarded. 1.00

01:07:24.000 It's not good. 1.00

01:07:26.000 That's why it's so weird.

01:07:27.000 It doesn't match the legs.

01:07:28.000 It looks like you're wearing a diaper.

01:07:32.000 It's just weird, man.

01:07:33.000 Well, it's weird that it became a trend. 0.99

01:07:35.000 What was weird was women who already had ass started doing it as well. 1.00

01:07:41.000 And then younger people started doing it. 0.99

01:07:43.000 Your body has not developed all the way out yet.

01:07:47.000 And you're injecting something into it?

01:07:50.000 What are they doing?

01:07:51.000 Because I know some of them are taking fat and they repurpose the fat. 1.00

01:07:55.000 So they're sucking fat out of some part of their body and then they're filling their ass with that fat. 0.99

01:08:00.000 But other ones are using an implant. 1.00

01:08:02.000 But fat burns. 1.00

01:08:04.000 So they can't work out with the shit. 1.00

01:08:07.000 Right. 1.00

01:08:08.000 Like, I don't know.

01:08:09.000 Maybe it doesn't last.

01:08:10.000 How does it work?

01:08:11.000 I have no idea.

01:08:12.000 Like, why? 0.85

01:08:13.000 You got fat in your face.

01:08:15.000 You want your lips big.

01:08:16.000 Like, I don't know.

01:08:18.000 Like, I'm confused by any male...

01:08:23.000 Probably men don't do it a lot, but men, it's mostly males with confidence, insecurities.

01:08:31.000 Why would you do that?

01:08:32.000 How many men have a lip injection?

01:08:34.000 Yes.

01:08:35.000 Is that real?

01:08:36.000 Yeah.

01:08:37.000 Gay men mostly, right? 0.59

01:08:38.000 Probably. 0.95

01:08:39.000 Probably.

01:08:40.000 What's going on, Jamie?

01:08:42.000 I saw a video recently of these three guys that had...

01:08:46.000 They were together?

01:08:49.000 Collectively.

01:08:49.000 They're called like the Three Kens or something like that.

01:08:52.000 They all spent a fuckload of money on all sorts.

01:08:55.000 Like $60,000 shoulder implants, one of the guys said.

01:08:59.000 Shoulder implants?

01:09:00.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:09:00.000 I'm trying to find a picture.

01:09:01.000 Are they getting her straight?

01:09:03.000 I'm not going to make that judgment show.

01:09:04.000 Well, let me hear them talk.

01:09:08.000 That'll solve it!

01:09:09.000 You can't tell if they're gay if you hear them talk, but you can tell if they're not straight. 0.98

01:09:16.000 Because if you hear a guy talk, he could talk like me, but he could be gay. 1.00

01:09:19.000 But if you hear a guy talk... 0.92

01:09:21.000 Yes, we already know what this is.

01:09:23.000 Like, I don't even have to... 1.00

01:09:25.000 Those guys are gay as fuck. 1.00

01:09:26.000 100%. 1.00

01:09:27.000 The one in the middle had the most.

01:09:27.000 Look how he's holding one.

01:09:28.000 He's had over a quarter million dollars, he said.

01:09:31.000 Oh my god.

01:09:31.000 Like, from where?

01:09:32.000 Like, what does he do?

01:09:33.000 Right, where's he getting that money?

01:09:35.000 They don't say that.

01:09:36.000 God, look at his face.

01:09:37.000 That's crazy.

01:09:38.000 Yeah, this guy's like 40s, I think.

01:09:40.000 The one on the right, he's probably in his 30s, and the young one is on the left.

01:09:43.000 He's just getting started.

01:09:45.000 With the surgery?

01:09:46.000 Yeah.

01:09:46.000 Oh, Jesus.

01:09:48.000 Oh, what are they doing to his head?

01:09:49.000 Oh, hair transplant.

01:09:50.000 Yeah, hair transplants.

01:09:51.000 But what they're doing to his face is weird.

01:09:54.000 Look, his cheeks are poked out.

01:09:56.000 Like, his cheeks look fake.

01:09:58.000 The thing is, like, there's a geometry to your face, like a natural geometry.

01:10:03.000 Like, if you have a long face and a big nose, and then you get a nose job, and you get this long face and a tiny nose, everybody's like, what?

01:10:11.000 Something looks wrong.

01:10:13.000 Aesthetically, you just don't, like...

01:10:15.000 Doesn't line up right. 1.00

01:10:17.000 When they start putting shit in their cheeks... 0.99

01:10:19.000 You got the first leg implants, it says. 1.00

01:10:21.000 What?

01:10:22.000 Multiple leg implants.

01:10:23.000 Oh, my God. 0.99

01:10:24.000 Oh, he's insane. 1.00

01:10:25.000 He's definitely insane. 1.00

01:10:26.000 This is an insane person. 1.00

01:10:29.000 Oh God, look at his shoulders. 1.00

01:10:30.000 That's crazy.

01:10:32.000 That's crazy.

01:10:33.000 $950,000 in...

01:10:35.000 Where's he getting the money, man?

01:10:37.000 On something that you could have just worked and got.

01:10:40.000 I think he has bicep implants too, it looks like.

01:10:43.000 Does he?

01:10:44.000 Oh my God, look at this doctor convincing him.

01:10:46.000 You look great, Marvin.

01:10:48.000 Marvin, I love this new face.

01:10:51.000 23 implants in total. 1.00

01:10:53.000 That guy probably aches like fuck when it rains out. 1.00

01:10:57.000 Everything hurts. 1.00

01:10:58.000 His shoulders, his biceps, his cheeks.

01:11:01.000 They're stuffing him in there.

01:11:02.000 Oh, God.

01:11:04.000 He's like a plastic man.

01:11:06.000 That's the boyfriend?

01:11:07.000 I don't know.

01:11:09.000 Oh, so they're cutting.

01:11:09.000 So he's probably scarred up everywhere.

01:11:11.000 Oh, geez, look how they're stuffing those things in the legs. 1.00

01:11:14.000 And obviously this is getting them more attention, so they're like addicted to that probably.

01:11:18.000 Oh yeah, for sure, that's part of it. 0.95

01:11:20.000 Look at this doc who looks crazy. 1.00

01:11:21.000 Imagine that goofy looking fuck is the guy who's telling you... 1.00

01:11:25.000 He looks like goddamn the doc from Back to the Future. 1.00

01:11:29.000 God, that's insane. 1.00

01:11:30.000 Thigh implants are insane.

01:11:32.000 And look at that, crowbarring it in! 1.00

01:11:33.000 Oh, God, that's so fucking sick. 0.99

01:11:36.000 Oh, look, he's got to trim it. 1.00

01:11:37.000 Oh, boy.

01:11:39.000 Six hours later, wake up, honey, you look great, you lumpy legs.

01:11:44.000 And your mom. 1.00

01:11:45.000 And his mom's got giant fake tits. 1.00

01:11:47.000 And look at... 1.00

01:11:48.000 Here's the reveal.

01:11:50.000 Oh, this is a reveal?

01:11:52.000 He's gonna show the legs?

01:11:53.000 Ta-da! 1.00

01:11:54.000 Let's see the legs. 0.98

01:11:56.000 Oh, they look weird.

01:11:59.000 Before?

01:12:00.000 After?

01:12:01.000 Wow.

01:12:02.000 In the picture it looks like he's got muscle, but not when it moves. 1.00

01:12:05.000 Just do some squats, you lazy bitch. 1.00

01:12:09.000 Leg muscles are not that hard to build. 1.00

01:12:11.000 That was fucking hard to watch. 0.98

01:12:13.000 I just don't understand. 0.99

01:12:15.000 It's an addiction.

01:12:18.000 That's like body dysmorphia, like anorexics.

01:12:21.000 They don't know what they look like.

01:12:22.000 They think they look good.

01:12:23.000 They need to be thinner.

01:12:25.000 They don't think they look like a skeleton.

01:12:27.000 I watch Botched.

01:12:29.000 I watch Botched. 1.00

01:12:32.000 And this guy, she's trying to look like a sex doll. 1.00

01:12:37.000 She's trying to look like a human sex doll. 1.00

01:12:39.000 And the man keeps telling her, like, your body can't take any, your tits cannot be bigger. 1.00

01:12:48.000 Like, we can't give you anything else. 1.00

01:12:52.000 She's like, I want it.

01:12:54.000 And if you don't do it, I'm going to go somewhere else dangerous and do it.

01:12:59.000 And her dude is like, yo, I don't want her to do this.

01:13:03.000 He's like a Finland dude from Finland.

01:13:05.000 I went to her to do this. 0.77

01:13:07.000 But it was just disgusting.

01:13:10.000 It was more sad than anything.

01:13:13.000 Why?

01:13:15.000 Ma'am, you don't know what you look like right now.

01:13:17.000 You have no idea what your natural...

01:13:19.000 It's like Lil' Kim to me.

01:13:21.000 Lil' Kim... 1.00

01:13:23.000 She was fucking perfect. 1.00

01:13:25.000 Then she just fucked it up. 1.00

01:13:26.000 Like, she just decided, yo, I'm gonna fuck my shit up with this... 0.99

01:13:31.000 And I guess it's some... 1.00

01:13:32.000 Man, I just don't understand that shit. 0.99

01:13:34.000 I don't know what she looks like now. 1.00

01:13:36.000 I haven't seen Lil' Kim in a long time.

01:13:38.000 Man, Lil' Kim. 1.00

01:13:39.000 What does she look like now? 1.00

01:13:40.000 Shit. 1.00

01:13:41.000 Tell him to put it up. 1.00

01:13:44.000 Go to the tail of the tape. 1.00

01:13:45.000 Shit! 1.00

01:13:46.000 These make me sad because I can see how people could go insane like that. 1.00

01:13:50.000 They go insane like girls who think their tits aren't big enough. 1.00

01:13:53.000 They want to keep going and going and going. 1.00

01:13:55.000 It's a mental illness.

01:13:56.000 Is it not enough people... 1.00

01:14:00.000 Telling you, Lil' Kim was fucking beautiful! 0.99

01:14:06.000 Well, maybe it's an age thing, right? 0.99

01:14:08.000 They get older, they just want something.

01:14:10.000 Like, but...

01:14:13.000 What? 1.00

01:14:14.000 They lose their youthful appearance and they want fillers and shit to fill their face up. 1.00

01:14:19.000 That's what a lot of it is with women. 1.00

01:14:21.000 It starts with the cheeks.

01:14:24.000 They start doing their cheeks and their cheeks get puffed out because that stretches your skin out and that reduces some wrinkles.

01:14:31.000 Because they don't have to see the wrinkles anymore, they think it's good.

01:14:34.000 I think it starts with makeup.

01:14:36.000 I think it starts with you hiding Who you are from the beginning.

01:14:43.000 And most people do it.

01:14:44.000 Most women wear makeup. 0.99

01:14:46.000 Most.

01:14:47.000 Right?

01:14:47.000 Do you want me to say?

01:14:48.000 Hopefully not.

01:14:49.000 But if you had a guess.

01:14:50.000 In America.

01:14:51.000 I average.

01:14:53.000 I put everything to America.

01:14:55.000 Because I think everybody else.

01:14:57.000 I was in Korea and never seen a nail shop.

01:15:00.000 Really?

01:15:01.000 They don't do their nails over there? 0.93

01:15:02.000 They don't go to the shop and do them.

01:15:04.000 I grew up.

01:15:05.000 But I understand that because I grew up.

01:15:07.000 My mother never went to the nail shop when I was growing up. 0.73

01:15:09.000 She always did her own nails. 0.99

01:15:10.000 That was something that women, that was a woman taking time to pamper themselves. 1.00

01:15:14.000 This was the thing that we heard growing up.

01:15:19.000 And I still want to hear it. 1.00

01:15:20.000 And I've never heard this shit in my life outside of my mother saying it, my aunt saying it, and saying this shit on the sitcom. 1.00

01:15:27.000 I cannot go out tonight because I'm washing my hair. 1.00

01:15:33.000 Washing my hair.

01:15:34.000 I'm washing my hair.

01:15:36.000 I'm getting ready to do it myself. 1.00

01:15:37.000 Women don't do that shit no more. 1.00

01:15:39.000 They don't? 1.00

01:15:41.000 They'll go somewhere.

01:15:42.000 They'll go somewhere.

01:15:44.000 Imagine if women could no longer wear makeup. 1.00

01:15:46.000 No women. 1.00

01:15:47.000 Oh my goodness.

01:15:48.000 I would have.

01:15:49.000 It would be the best for me.

01:15:50.000 You like that?

01:15:51.000 Because now it takes away the tricks.

01:15:55.000 Yeah.

01:15:56.000 No more trickery.

01:15:57.000 No more.

01:15:57.000 Because men can't do it.

01:16:01.000 We don't have shit. 1.00

01:16:02.000 You got to get a woman off what the fuck you look like. 1.00

01:16:05.000 Exactly. 1.00

01:16:06.000 Look like I can provide, I can protect, and this is what the fuck I look like. 0.99

01:16:11.000 I'm Biggie Smalls. 0.99

01:16:14.000 I'm goddamn KC. This is what I look like. 0.98

01:16:18.000 My head is warped.

01:16:20.000 My beard don't connect. 1.00

01:16:21.000 I'm fucking crazy. 0.99

01:16:23.000 Look, do you like me? 0.99

01:16:25.000 I wonder how it started that women started, because you know way back in the Cleopatra days, like Cleopatra was known for wearing lipstick and makeup, so we know they wore it. 0.84

01:16:38.000 Like in the hieroglyphics, you could see the women had makeup on. 1.00

01:16:41.000 So I wonder when they started that shit. 1.00

01:16:43.000 It was clay. 1.00

01:16:43.000 It was like clay. 1.00

01:16:44.000 She had a clay rouge on her back. 0.96

01:16:46.000 Yeah, it was probably terrible makeup back then. 0.98

01:16:49.000 There's a dark dick, but Claire Rapp, she looked good regular. 1.00

01:16:53.000 They're like, oh, Claire Rapp's bad motherfucking regular. 1.00

01:16:55.000 But how much makeup could they actually have? 0.98

01:16:58.000 What was it made out of?

01:16:59.000 It was like a dirt mist egg.

01:17:01.000 Roundup herbs.

01:17:02.000 Hey, I need you to bring the maiden in. 1.00

01:17:05.000 I need a clay dust mask over my face.

01:17:08.000 Not too much!

01:17:10.000 Let's try to guess.

01:17:11.000 When do you think the invention of makeup took place?

01:17:15.000 What year?

01:17:22.000 I know in Sumer there's images of earrings.

01:17:26.000 So I know they had hoop earrings way back in ancient Sumer.

01:17:31.000 Okay.

01:17:32.000 So I think...

01:17:38.000 We're going to take off henna.

01:17:39.000 We're going to take henna out of being a sort of type of makeup. 1.00

01:17:43.000 Yeah, that's more of a tattoo.

01:17:44.000 But it was a thing that they used to do to design their face and then they would take it off and that's why they would look the same all the time.

01:17:53.000 So henna, we'll take that out. 0.93

01:17:57.000 It's kind of a kind of makeup though, isn't it?

01:17:59.000 Yeah.

01:18:00.000 That would be what Cleopatra would use. 1.00

01:18:03.000 I want to say it's 5,000 years old.

01:18:07.000 That's what I want to say.

01:18:08.000 I want to say makeup is 5,000 years old. 1.00

01:18:10.000 Shit. 0.99

01:18:12.000 I'm going to say as in today's time, I'm going to give it Is Shakespeare 5,000 years old? 1.00

01:18:25.000 No.

01:18:26.000 Shakespeare was like, what, 1400s?

01:18:28.000 1400s.

01:18:29.000 Is that right?

01:18:30.000 Shakespearean times.

01:18:31.000 I'm just guessing.

01:18:32.000 Sounds like 15, 14?

01:18:34.000 14, 15, something like that.

01:18:36.000 Sounds right.

01:18:36.000 I'm going to give it the 1500s.

01:18:38.000 Oh, that's what you think?

01:18:38.000 Yeah, I bet it.

01:18:39.000 Makeup?

01:18:40.000 1500s?

01:18:41.000 Wow.

01:18:42.000 Oh, Roman times. 0.54

01:18:43.000 Google says the first dynasty of Egypt, which is about 5,000.

01:18:46.000 It says 5,000 to 6,000 years ago.

01:18:48.000 3,100, 2,900 BC. Okay.

01:18:51.000 But that's...

01:18:52.000 Something called Unjuant.

01:18:55.000 What was it called?

01:18:55.000 Unjuant?

01:18:56.000 What?

01:18:57.000 Unjuant.

01:19:07.000 So, it's this thing that Muslim men use up under our eyes. 1.00

01:19:19.000 It's almost like a mascara.

01:19:22.000 But it was used during the times when they were riding to glare out sun.

01:19:27.000 But me and Ed would be using it up under their eyes.

01:19:30.000 Like how football players put it on their cheeks.

01:19:32.000 Yes, but it was right up under their eyes.

01:19:37.000 5,000 years ago.

01:19:40.000 The Smithsonian's paint cosmetics shortly after the American Revolution, which is a big difference in time.

01:19:48.000 I was reading something where they were talking about men wearing makeup.

01:19:52.000 Like, men are gonna start wearing makeup and bass and stuff on a regular basis.

01:19:55.000 I'm like, no.

01:19:57.000 Try pushing that.

01:19:59.000 There's a lot of guys that do, though.

01:20:01.000 I shouldn't say a lot, but that's been a thing since I was in a band. 0.97

01:20:06.000 Like, guys wearing different men, fingernail paint, eye mascara, and touch up shit for pimples. 0.92

01:20:14.000 The band thing is a different thing. 0.96

01:20:16.000 Like guys who wear makeup in a band.

01:20:18.000 But we talking about the guy at Target.

01:20:22.000 Face full of bass. 0.99

01:20:23.000 How did that shit happen with bands? 0.99

01:20:25.000 When bands like Poison, they started wearing like mascara and eyeliner and full makeup on. 0.99

01:20:31.000 Maybe with Kiss.

01:20:32.000 Yeah, but Kiss was like costume makeup.

01:20:35.000 They had stars over their eyes.

01:20:38.000 I love Kiss, though.

01:20:40.000 Jewish guys.

01:20:41.000 Maybe Ozzy Osbourne, though.

01:20:43.000 It wasn't a big difference, though, with just colors instead of just black and white.

01:20:48.000 They went blue and pink and glitter.

01:20:50.000 I guess.

01:20:51.000 But Kiss, what they did is it was a genius move.

01:20:55.000 What Kiss did is they made it so that they were famous, but they were also anonymous.

01:21:00.000 Nobody knew what they looked like underneath that design.

01:21:02.000 So they would go...

01:21:03.000 I met Ace Frehley from Kiss when I was really young.

01:21:06.000 I was like 8 years old, 9 years old, something like that.

01:21:09.000 I was...

01:21:10.000 I saw him with no makeup on.

01:21:12.000 My uncle was an...

01:21:14.000 He was an artist.

01:21:16.000 What was that?

01:21:16.000 Snyder.

01:21:17.000 Oh, yeah, Twisted Sister. 1.00

01:21:19.000 But not a lot of people were doing that. 0.91

01:21:21.000 I mean, it looks like a clown kind of.

01:21:22.000 But that was kind of, you know, theatrical.

01:21:25.000 So my uncle worked for Howard Marks Advertising, which was like a company that did the album covers for KISS. So my uncle was an artist.

01:21:35.000 And so he took me to work with him one day, and Ace Frehley from KISS came into the office with no makeup on.

01:21:42.000 I was like, oh!

01:21:43.000 Like, for a little kid, it's like seeing Santa Claus.

01:21:45.000 Like, what?

01:21:46.000 This is what you really look like?

01:21:47.000 Yeah.

01:21:48.000 It was kind of crazy.

01:21:50.000 It's like...

01:21:51.000 This is not that.

01:21:53.000 Oh, look at that.

01:21:54.000 Look at Poison.

01:21:55.000 That's so crazy.

01:21:57.000 I think all of them was trying to recreate that Parliament era.

01:22:02.000 Parliament was before that.

01:22:03.000 Yeah, right.

01:22:04.000 That's true.

01:22:06.000 Yeah, we're kissing them.

01:22:07.000 It was like, if you look up, if you look Parliament.

01:22:10.000 Little Richard.

01:22:11.000 Yeah.

01:22:12.000 Little Richard was earlier.

01:22:13.000 George Clinton.

01:22:14.000 Yeah.

01:22:15.000 And Little Richard was before George Clinton.

01:22:17.000 Yeah.

01:22:18.000 Little Richard was wearing makeup before anybody.

01:22:20.000 And he was like the most famous guy who was androgynous before anybody. 0.99

01:22:26.000 You know, go to like some old Little Richard shit. 0.97

01:22:30.000 And a lot of people forgot, like, Rick James had a lot of androgynous to him. 0.98

01:22:33.000 He had those crazy high boots and...

01:22:35.000 Yeah.

01:22:36.000 Rick James did.

01:22:37.000 That was one of the...

01:22:38.000 Yeah.

01:22:38.000 Look at that.

01:22:39.000 I mean, come on.

01:22:41.000 This is Little Richard in, like, the 50s, man.

01:22:48.000 Yeah.

01:22:50.000 I mean, come on.

01:22:52.000 Look at that hair.

01:22:53.000 That's wild.

01:22:56.000 You know that song, Tootie Fruity O'Rudy? 0.63

01:22:58.000 It used to be Tootie Fruity Good Booty?

01:23:00.000 Well, they said that's too risque.

01:23:01.000 Yeah.

01:23:02.000 You gotta change those lyrics. 1.00

01:23:03.000 It's a damn show. 1.00

01:23:06.000 That's what it was. 1.00

01:23:07.000 It was originally Tootie Fruity Good Booty.

01:23:09.000 See if you can find the original lyrics for Tootie Fruity.

01:23:14.000 Because they were like, no, no. 1.00

01:23:16.000 Little Richard was a bad motherfucker. 0.98

01:23:19.000 If you think about the kind of suppression that that guy must have faced trying to become famous with that act in America during that time, and he was so talented that they just had to let him go. 0.99

01:23:35.000 They just had to let him go.

01:23:36.000 Tootie Fruity Good Booty, if it don't fit, don't force it. 1.00

01:23:40.000 You can grease it, make it easy. 0.98

01:23:46.000 What the fuck is wrong? 1.00

01:23:48.000 He's talking about butt-fucking. 1.00

01:23:49.000 Why did he think that was going on the radio? 1.00

01:23:51.000 Like, what the fuck was Little Richard thinking about? 0.99

01:23:54.000 Because he was so wild. 1.00

01:23:55.000 He was getting away with so much.

01:23:56.000 You know, it's in the band.

01:23:58.000 It's like, you know, it's that new thing out there.

01:24:02.000 Trying to join the band.

01:24:05.000 This is me trying to...

01:24:06.000 It was the 4th of November.

01:24:09.000 Oh, good.

01:24:10.000 Bringing the horns.

01:24:10.000 And everybody stopped.

01:24:11.000 Just think about... 1.00

01:24:13.000 The people that's playing with Lil' Richard on this fucking song. 1.00

01:24:16.000 Tootie Fruity, good booty. 0.99

01:24:19.000 What's the lyrics?

01:24:20.000 If it don't fit, don't force it.

01:24:21.000 If it don't fit, don't force it.

01:24:24.000 You can grease it, make it easy.

01:24:27.000 Those were replaced with Tootie Fruity All Rudy, Tootie Fruity All Rudy.

01:24:32.000 All Rudy was a slang expression meaning all right.

01:24:36.000 According to Charles Conner, Little Rich's drummer, the original lyrics were, Tutti Frutti, good booty, if it's tight, it's alright, and if it's greasy, it makes it easy.

01:24:47.000 Oh my god.

01:24:50.000 Why I can't say that? 0.99

01:24:51.000 He's talking about butt-fucking in a song he's trying to sell to the radio. 1.00

01:24:56.000 Fuck all that! 1.00

01:24:59.000 I ain't chasing shit! 1.00

01:25:01.000 He was so interesting. 1.00

01:25:04.000 Tootie Fruity.

01:25:05.000 Good booty. 1.00

01:25:07.000 Grease it.

01:25:08.000 Makes it easy.

01:25:10.000 Don't fit, don't force it. 1.00

01:25:12.000 God damn, Richard! 1.00

01:25:15.000 Yeah, Richard was crazy as shit. 1.00

01:25:17.000 I don't know what made him think that was going on the radio. 1.00

01:25:20.000 Can you imagine?

01:25:21.000 We just trying to get it on the radio. 1.00

01:25:26.000 Fuck the radio. 1.00

01:25:28.000 I need to express myself. 1.00

01:25:29.000 Do you think that there's a recording?

01:25:32.000 I don't know.

01:25:33.000 I'm looking at this.

01:25:34.000 The story it says, which might not be accurate, but it says on here that he was having the first recording session.

01:25:40.000 The session wore on.

01:25:41.000 He became frustrated that his Anarchic performance style is not being fully captured on tape.

01:25:46.000 During a lunch break, he started pounding on the piano and singing a ribald song that he wrote and composed and had been performing live for a few years.

01:25:55.000 And that's what this was.

01:25:56.000 But that's a Wikipedia quick explanation of a story.

01:26:02.000 Who knows if it actually happened that way.

01:26:04.000 You'd have to talk to him.

01:26:05.000 Is he still alive?

01:26:07.000 I think?

01:26:10.000 What's he up there?

01:26:12.000 No, but I feel like...

01:26:16.000 We looked, and he died during the pandemic, yeah.

01:26:18.000 That's right.

01:26:19.000 That's right.

01:26:20.000 Oh, he died.

01:26:21.000 Little Richard died a lot.

01:26:23.000 Yeah, he died in 2020. Y'all knew he had parents.

01:26:25.000 Oh, he died real recently, in May of 2020. Yeah, Little Richard died.

01:26:29.000 There's some dudes that just, like, they break through in such a way, they're so different than anybody else, that it kind of changes the genre.

01:26:38.000 It kind of changes the art for them.

01:26:40.000 You! 1.00

01:26:40.000 Shit! 1.00

01:26:41.000 Me? 1.00

01:26:41.000 What are you talking about? 1.00

01:26:42.000 What did I do?

01:26:42.000 Yo!

01:26:43.000 Yo, I'm not going to talk to you about it later, but it was a couple things.

01:26:51.000 So, I'm doing a podcast, Godfrey's podcast, and you come up.

01:27:00.000 And my take on things is always a little different.

01:27:05.000 So they're like, Joe Rogan, what you think about Joe Rogan, N-word, and this and that.

01:27:12.000 Okay, let's talk about it.

01:27:14.000 You know Joe Rogan.

01:27:16.000 Same thing that happened with Ari.

01:27:18.000 I'm the closest person that they know to talk to.

01:27:24.000 It seems like I'm the only black person that knows Joey Diaz that somebody else would know.

01:27:30.000 So I'm adjacent to Ari.

01:27:34.000 Then when you came up with this, I said, well, let's look at it.

01:27:42.000 Y'all know me.

01:27:43.000 Do I think Joe Rogan is racist?

01:27:46.000 No.

01:27:49.000 Did he talk about it? 1.00

01:27:55.000 I say racist people run from shit and try to... 1.00

01:27:59.000 I'm doing this. 1.00

01:28:01.000 Talked about it.

01:28:04.000 Well, you going on this show?

01:28:06.000 You been on this show?

01:28:09.000 I said, well, let me tell you this.

01:28:12.000 Do you think it's about that? 0.98

01:28:15.000 Or do you think it's about Joe Rogan is running a fucking muck on media? 0.98

01:28:21.000 Like, if y'all know how fucking leaps and bounds he is passing. 0.98

01:28:27.000 Like, they say Johnny Carson level, like, you going on the news, Johnny Carson. 0.97

01:28:31.000 No, when you look at the numbers of who people pay attention to, listening time. 0.97

01:28:37.000 It's like if we was racing and the race started in Texas, everybody else, Netflix, news stations, all the rest of it, whatever fucking talk show you can come up with. 0.82

01:28:55.000 Everybody's in Austin. 0.95

01:28:56.000 They start running in Houston.

01:28:57.000 They're in Austin. 0.99

01:28:59.000 Joe is in fucking Oklahoma already. 0.99

01:29:02.000 And y'all still trying to catch him. 0.99

01:29:04.000 Like he's running a different race.

01:29:06.000 People listen to him for a long time.

01:29:09.000 Just the amount of time.

01:29:11.000 So you change the game.

01:29:14.000 In a way that I feel like media attacked you all at one time trying to diminish something.

01:29:19.000 Like, just throw everything at him at one time.

01:29:22.000 Well, there's definitely that, too.

01:29:23.000 Like, I saw it, and it was like, nobody else would see that point.

01:29:29.000 They just, they just like, oh, Joe, they're doing this, they're doing that.

01:29:35.000 But why?

01:29:37.000 Like, and then I compared it to Fat Joe.

01:29:42.000 I was like, I could see from every angle. 0.98

01:29:48.000 Even with young white kids, when they go to a rap concert, they don't fucking edit the words. 0.97

01:29:56.000 What's the Fat Joe comparison? 0.98

01:29:57.000 I'm finna get to it.

01:29:58.000 Like, Fat Joe has said the N-word to people in the vicinity of people, whatever.

01:30:06.000 I say, y'all don't ever get mad at Fat Joe.

01:30:09.000 Because he's Dominican.

01:30:11.000 I say, but just think. 1.00

01:30:13.000 You can't explain that shit to my uncle. 1.00

01:30:16.000 Or my grandmother. 1.00

01:30:18.000 Or my Aunt Willa. 0.99

01:30:19.000 My Aunt Willa don't give a fuck about what you think you adjacent to. 1.00

01:30:22.000 She 106. She don't give a fuck what you talking about. 1.00

01:30:26.000 None of that registers to her that gives you a pass about you being Dominican or you being Cuban or you using a jet. 1.00

01:30:34.000 None of that shit registers to her. 0.99

01:30:36.000 So it's about who gets mad at what time. 1.00

01:30:40.000 You're not finna fucking... 0.97

01:30:43.000 Take my feelings on something and try to make something a trigger. 0.99

01:30:48.000 Do I look at Joe as Louis C.K. of Ricky Jarvis?

01:30:53.000 No. 1.00

01:30:53.000 Because if I ever ran into them, I'd snap the shit out of Ricky Jarvis and fucking Louis C.K. And I got a problem with Chris. 1.00

01:31:03.000 Because I said all this shit on Joe. 0.99

01:31:05.000 I got a problem with Chris sitting there as his fucking jovial because Seinfeld wasn't. 1.00

01:31:09.000 Seinfeld was looking in the camera like, are y'all fucking losing y'all mind? 0.99

01:31:14.000 Because his best friend is George Wallace. 0.99

01:31:16.000 So you're using it in a space and you're fucking with people that it's not... 0.91

01:31:22.000 I say, now we get to the gist of it. 0.99

01:31:26.000 You got to understand how to explain shit. 0.99

01:31:30.000 That's just how people do. 1.00

01:31:31.000 I wouldn't have sat there with Chris and listened to him, listened to fucking Louis C.K. and Ricky Gervais in Word It Up. 0.98

01:31:40.000 I wouldn't have fucking did that. 0.97

01:31:43.000 With people, they try to turn whatever they want to turn. 0.99

01:31:49.000 You can't fucking use me to get your agenda across. 0.98

01:31:55.000 That's what you can't do with me. 0.99

01:31:58.000 I'm going to ask the person, square up what it is, and me and the person, and then either I deny or defend that person. 0.99

01:32:07.000 But Y'all try to pick and choose shit that you can't explain to across the board the shit. 0.99

01:32:16.000 You can't explain across the board. 1.00

01:32:17.000 You got to go to that person that I understand how things happen across the board.

01:32:21.000 You mean individually?

01:32:22.000 Individually.

01:32:22.000 In context.

01:32:23.000 Yeah.

01:32:23.000 You can't defend somebody without talking to them where they are.

01:32:35.000 I think?

01:32:56.000 They just attacked the whole thing.

01:32:58.000 He never said that you couldn't film.

01:33:00.000 He said he doesn't want you on top of the officers filming.

01:33:04.000 Oh, what does on top mean? 0.99

01:33:06.000 Who the fuck don't know what on top mean? 0.99

01:33:08.000 But you're a journalist, so you're trying to create this atmosphere of bullshit that you don't know what on top is. 0.99

01:33:15.000 On top, and then they went to the Rights Act afterwards, the film Rights Act in New York. 0.93

01:33:21.000 It said a safe distance.

01:33:23.000 Filming with your camera, doing a police thing, you have to do it at a safe distance.

01:33:29.000 On top of somebody, it's not a safe distance.

01:33:31.000 And then you're not even considering the other side.

01:33:33.000 You're just riling people up about, he's trying to stop filming.

01:33:36.000 No, he's not trying to stop filming. 1.00

01:33:37.000 But what if you filming, and of course, the altercation turns towards you, and now you involved in the shit, and you get shot. 1.00

01:33:47.000 Or I'm a cop, I end up shooting you, or the person in the shit, or stab. 1.00

01:33:51.000 If you on top of me while I'm trying to do my... 1.00

01:33:53.000 It's like being...

01:33:54.000 You've been a referee before.

01:33:56.000 No, I haven't.

01:33:57.000 No, you've been in the ring with the people who ref.

01:34:00.000 Yes.

01:34:03.000 Is he on top of the action or he knows the balance of how to move out the way?

01:34:09.000 It's like a football referee.

01:34:12.000 When they play football, they know how to get out the way.

01:34:14.000 Does a normal citizen know how to do that?

01:34:17.000 No.

01:34:20.000 So it makes sense for the man to say, I don't want you filming on top of the officers while they're trying to do their thing.

01:34:28.000 You can stand back and do it.

01:34:30.000 But when it's spent on media, it says that he's trying to don't film.

01:34:36.000 He's trying to get rid of filming. 0.99

01:34:38.000 He's trying to all this shit is about filming. 1.00

01:34:42.000 You know this don't say gay shit in Florida? 1.00

01:34:44.000 Do you hear about this? 1.00

01:34:45.000 No.

01:34:45.000 You don't hear about this?

01:34:47.000 They're calling this a don't say gay law in Florida with kids.

01:34:52.000 They're pretending that they're saying don't say gay. 0.97

01:34:57.000 So everybody's saying gay, gay, gay. 0.92

01:34:58.000 I'm going to say gay because I support gay people and gay rights and gay this and gay that. 0.87

01:35:02.000 But that's not what the law is.

01:35:04.000 What the law does say is that from first grade to third grade, you can't bring up gender transition, sexual orientation, whether people are gay or straight.

01:35:16.000 They say, don't teach that in class. 0.84

01:35:18.000 That's it.

01:35:19.000 That's the law, which seems reasonable.

01:35:21.000 You don't want an unknown person who's a teacher, a stranger, talking to your child who's six About sexual transitioning and gender transitioning and sexual orientation and gay people and bisexual people and non-binary people. 0.99

01:35:40.000 Like, hey, hey, hey, that fucking kid needs to learn how to read and write and Count and no history and normal shit. 0.99

01:35:48.000 They don't need to know about trans kids and that's not for you to teach. 1.00

01:35:53.000 That's not your job.

01:35:54.000 That's a delicate issue to be handled by parents and loved ones.

01:36:02.000 And so people are freaking out and they're calling it the don't say gay bill.

01:36:06.000 But that's not what the bill is.

01:36:07.000 But if you say don't say gay, people freak out. 0.99

01:36:10.000 Oh, Florida is just so homophobic and they're so backwards. 0.98

01:36:14.000 Like, that's not what it says. 0.98

01:36:16.000 It's not what it says.

01:36:18.000 So this is what people want to happen.

01:36:25.000 Let's not use the word normal.

01:36:29.000 I'm going to use the word in a natural reproductive society. 0.99

01:36:40.000 You want my son to come to school and not want to understand.

01:36:47.000 I drew a picture of my family and it had my mom and My dad, my sister's dog, and myself.

01:37:00.000 So I understand how I got here. 0.99

01:37:04.000 These two people, her stomach was big, then I fucking came out. 1.00

01:37:12.000 Your picture, Rick, is two goddamn men or two women And you, yourself and some other children that don't look like you either. 0.99

01:37:29.000 And you don't want my, you don't, you want me, you want, you want to, you want to send my son home to me and you want me to fucking lie to him about what, what, cause my son don't understand if I, we have two dogs outside as both boy dogs. 0.99

01:37:46.000 There's no puppy out there that came out. 0.98

01:37:49.000 There's no fucking other dog out there that came from them, too. 0.99

01:37:53.000 But over here, there's a female cane, Corso, and this male cane, Corso. 0.99

01:37:59.000 They have puppies.

01:38:03.000 What do you want me to say to my son?

01:38:05.000 What do you want me to say to my son?

01:38:06.000 Do you want me to... 1.00

01:38:09.000 Make sense of your shit or you want me to tell him the truth? 1.00

01:38:16.000 Because he's going to get the truth, but you don't want me to tell him. 1.00

01:38:20.000 You want me to send my son to school, just like my son. 0.99

01:38:23.000 I had to take my son out of school because my son does not tolerate the bullshit. 0.99

01:38:28.000 Yo, he's in there in class like, yo, there's no Santa Claus. 1.00

01:38:33.000 I'm not drawing none of this shit. 1.00

01:38:36.000 Yo! 1.00

01:38:37.000 Ain't nobody coming down your fucking chimney! 1.00

01:38:40.000 Your son, the rest of the kids... 1.00

01:38:42.000 How old was he?

01:38:44.000 My son was like eight.

01:38:46.000 Well, how old are they supposed to be when you tell them?

01:38:48.000 My son is like, yo man, I don't...

01:38:52.000 Hey, just want to let the class know Christmas is not real.

01:38:57.000 Got it straight from my dad.

01:38:59.000 Just got it straight from my dad.

01:39:00.000 Showed me a history, all the rest of it, and ran it down.

01:39:04.000 Yo, Santa Claus is not real, little girl.

01:39:09.000 I had to get him.

01:39:10.000 I had to get him out of school.

01:39:11.000 It was done.

01:39:12.000 But if you have two guys and they have a kid, you could say they adopted the kid.

01:39:16.000 They're married and they adopted a kid.

01:39:18.000 You could say they hired a lady to have their kid. 1.00

01:39:20.000 I have a gay neighbor that lives next to me. 1.00

01:39:23.000 My son wants to know why in the fuck does two men live in a house together with a kid and they not his uncles? 1.00

01:39:30.000 He not understanding that shit. 1.00

01:39:31.000 It's no... 1.00

01:39:32.000 You cannot explain this to this boy.

01:39:34.000 You can't explain gay people to him? 1.00

01:39:38.000 Now I gotta explain that this is not the way this shit goes. 1.00

01:39:42.000 That's what I'm trying to explain. 1.00

01:39:43.000 I had to take him out of school because my son is going back to school with, yo, your family fucked up. 0.99

01:39:48.000 I just want you to know. 1.00

01:39:49.000 Your family's on some bullshit. 1.00

01:39:54.000 Your dad is a butt plug for the other one. 1.00

01:39:56.000 Like, yo, fuck you. 1.00

01:39:58.000 What you talking about, man? 1.00

01:40:00.000 Now you gotta take him out of school because of this? 1.00

01:40:04.000 You gotta fuck nature up for him. 0.99

01:40:06.000 Because this is fucking up the course of life. 1.00

01:40:09.000 He does not understand why you would have two moms or why you would have two dads. 1.00

01:40:13.000 Like, that shit... 1.00

01:40:14.000 How you got here? 1.00

01:40:16.000 Fuck all the rest of that. 1.00

01:40:17.000 How did your ass get here? 1.00

01:40:19.000 Like, I know people who adopted. 1.00

01:40:22.000 Yeah.

01:40:22.000 Because he knows someone that's adopted.

01:40:24.000 They have a mother and they have a father.

01:40:27.000 They have a brother.

01:40:28.000 So he can't square off two guys living together.

01:40:30.000 Two guys and two girls. 1.00

01:40:31.000 That shit doesn't match to him. 1.00

01:40:33.000 How... 1.00

01:40:36.000 It's like, but also with gardening.

01:40:39.000 You got to think of this as a person who gardens.

01:40:43.000 Two, I planted a seed in a place where it can grow.

01:40:55.000 Where did you grow?

01:41:03.000 Where did you grow?

01:41:06.000 Well, that's complicated.

01:41:07.000 We had a surrogate, and that surrogate gave birth to our child.

01:41:12.000 Why don't you have a woman to plant your seed in? 1.00

01:41:16.000 Well, I don't like women, but I do want to have children. 1.00

01:41:20.000 That don't make sense to me.

01:41:22.000 You're eight. 0.99

01:41:24.000 And it don't make sense to his goddamn 48-year-old father, like, either. 0.99

01:41:29.000 And I know this is probably the most controversial shit ever in life to even be said. 1.00

01:41:33.000 But I think that you can't have, you know, the shit that Kate can eat it to? 0.99

01:41:40.000 In my mind, it doesn't work like that. 0.99

01:41:43.000 You have to forfeit something in order to achieve something. 0.97

01:41:49.000 Something got to fucking go. 0.94

01:41:50.000 You can't have, in order to be successful, I have to spend time away from my family to do it. 0.94

01:41:59.000 So there's some things that I'm going to miss.

01:42:01.000 That's the sacrifice of the job.

01:42:04.000 That's the sacrifice of the business.

01:42:06.000 So if I don't want to be a comedian that's on the road, I don't want to travel into certain things that I can't do.

01:42:16.000 I didn't have kids before I could afford them.

01:42:21.000 If I wasn't going to work to take care of them, then I shouldn't have had them. 0.99

01:42:26.000 If I decide that women not in the cards for me, that's not what I want, then I should forfeit the right to try to have a fucking kid too. 1.00

01:42:38.000 Because you're not doing the steps to make a kid. 0.99

01:42:41.000 You're in a different zone now. 1.00

01:42:43.000 Do that shit. 1.00

01:42:44.000 Do whatever comes with that. 1.00

01:42:46.000 And a kid doesn't come with that because you can't You can't make it naturally.

01:42:54.000 You can't do what... 0.97

01:42:55.000 The shit that you're doing and the shit that you're about, that you accepted that you're about, is that now. 1.00

01:43:03.000 I can't be a football player and keep fucking trying to run basketball drills. 1.00

01:43:10.000 Some of this shit you gotta forfeit. 1.00

01:43:12.000 So you think that if someone's gay, if they have a gay relationship, no kids? 1.00

01:43:17.000 No kids.

01:43:18.000 But what about if they adopt kids?

01:43:19.000 They shouldn't have kids. 0.79

01:43:21.000 You're not doing...

01:43:22.000 You're not in a space for children.

01:43:25.000 But if they want to adopt kids. 0.99

01:43:27.000 You want to fuck somebody up. 1.00

01:43:28.000 You want to put somebody in a position to be fucked up. 1.00

01:43:31.000 It's like getting a dog but not having no fucking place for the dog to be. 0.99

01:43:36.000 You want to take a dog that never put them outside. 0.99

01:43:39.000 You put them in a laundry room.

01:43:41.000 You put them in a laundry room in your apartment.

01:43:44.000 And that's it.

01:43:45.000 He pees on a mat.

01:43:47.000 He pees in a thing. 1.00

01:43:48.000 This is not no fucking dog no more. 1.00

01:43:50.000 He's an animal in a laundry room peeing on a fucking mat that's in a kennel. 1.00

01:43:55.000 And he runs around your house. 1.00

01:43:58.000 He has no idea of what it's like to be a fucking dog. 1.00

01:44:03.000 So you think a kid who gets adopted by gay parents, you feel like automatically they're going to get fucked up? 1.00

01:44:10.000 They're going to be fucked up automatically! 1.00

01:44:12.000 Really? 1.00

01:44:13.000 You don't think that they can...

01:44:14.000 I have a neighbor in California and they had a surrogate raise their kid. 0.66

01:44:20.000 They're two gay guys. 0.92

01:44:21.000 And they mixed their sperm up so they didn't know whose it was. 0.99

01:44:24.000 And they hired a lady to get pregnant. 1.00

01:44:26.000 And they shot it in there.

01:44:28.000 And the first lady wanted to keep the baby. 1.00

01:44:30.000 She's like, fuck it, I'm keeping the baby. 1.00

01:44:32.000 And they had to let her keep the baby because it was... 1.00

01:44:36.000 It was inside of her body.

01:44:37.000 She grew it, and she was so attached to the baby that by the time it was born, she did not want to give up the baby.

01:44:43.000 Exactly.

01:44:43.000 And then they hired another one, and then the second one gave up the baby.

01:44:46.000 And the kid, I watched him grow up.

01:44:49.000 He was my neighbor for probably eight years, somewhere around there.

01:44:54.000 I was friends with the gay couple, friends with the kid.

01:44:57.000 Kid seemed fine.

01:44:58.000 He seemed normal.

01:45:00.000 Come by the house on a skateboard, hang out.

01:45:02.000 He seemed like a normal kid.

01:45:04.000 Hung out with my kid.

01:45:06.000 They seemed okay to me.

01:45:08.000 You don't think that's possible? 0.99

01:45:09.000 You have a look on your face like there's no fucking way. 1.00

01:45:13.000 Look at the look on your face! 0.99

01:45:20.000 I try to be open-minded.

01:45:22.000 When I was a kid, I lived in San Francisco in a very gay neighborhood when I was seven years old.

01:45:27.000 From the time I was seven till I was 11, I lived in San Francisco.

01:45:31.000 And so I was around gay people all the time.

01:45:33.000 We were in this area near...

01:45:36.000 It was near Lombard Street, which is like the crookedest street in the world.

01:45:41.000 That's where we lived. 0.92

01:45:42.000 And it was just gay people everywhere.

01:45:43.000 It was normal to be around gay people.

01:45:47.000 For me.

01:45:50.000 Gay people have been everywhere for as long as I've ever known.

01:45:55.000 But back then they didn't have kids. 0.98

01:45:56.000 No, a lot of gay people. 0.91

01:45:58.000 That's true. 0.93

01:45:58.000 None of them had kids. 0.93

01:45:59.000 They weren't adopting kids back then.

01:46:00.000 They weren't adopting kids. 0.99

01:46:01.000 And not one of them, not one gay person I even know to this day that I even think is fucking responsible enough to have kids. 1.00

01:46:11.000 It's not like I don't know gay people. 0.99

01:46:13.000 I'm not against you being gay. 1.00

01:46:14.000 I'm against you being gay and having a fucking kid. 1.00

01:46:16.000 But don't you think there's a lot of kids out there that need to be adopted that no one wants to adopt? 1.00

01:46:20.000 Because I think there's more kids that need to be adopted than there are people that want to adopt kids.

01:46:26.000 Is that correct?

01:46:27.000 Probably so. 0.81

01:46:27.000 There's probably a shit ton of kids that need to be adopted. 0.81

01:46:31.000 Kids need a lot of things. 1.00

01:46:32.000 But what you don't need is to be in another fucking chaotic environment with a fucking person who is doing some shit that is Different than what you do. 1.00

01:46:42.000 It's called an alternative lifestyle for a reason. 1.00

01:46:46.000 It's not knocking what you're doing, but you can't... 0.99

01:46:50.000 I think people just want normal shit with... 0.99

01:46:54.000 It's like... 1.00

01:46:55.000 This shit is like having... 1.00

01:46:57.000 Getting married and spending a lot on a wedding. 1.00

01:47:02.000 And it's not the normal circumstances. 1.00

01:47:05.000 This shit frustrates me to no end. 1.00

01:47:08.000 That men just get the fucking short end of the stick on everything because you just accept shit. 1.00

01:47:14.000 So you have a wedding. 1.00

01:47:16.000 A wedding costs $30,000, $40,000, $50,000 dollars.

01:47:22.000 But you paying for the wedding. 1.00

01:47:24.000 Is that how the shit go? 1.00

01:47:25.000 Is that how it's supposed to go? 1.00

01:47:27.000 That you, as the man, are supposed to pay for your wedding.

01:47:31.000 That's how it's supposed to go?

01:47:32.000 Or the father of the bride is supposed to pay for the wedding?

01:47:35.000 How is it actually supposed to go?

01:47:36.000 I think it's supposed to be the father of the bride.

01:47:38.000 Is that how it's actually supposed to go, right?

01:47:40.000 I think so.

01:47:41.000 Okay.

01:47:41.000 That's what I was taught.

01:47:42.000 I just wanted to make sure.

01:47:43.000 But a lot of times it turns out to be the bride, or the husband.

01:47:46.000 The husband winds up paying.

01:47:47.000 But why is he spending... 1.00

01:47:50.000 This shit just fucking bothers me. 1.00

01:47:52.000 You want a traditional wedding with untraditional circumstances. 1.00

01:47:56.000 This shit is fucking stupid. 1.00

01:47:57.000 How's that untraditional? 1.00

01:47:59.000 Traditional is the father of the bride pays. 0.98

01:48:01.000 The family of this woman pays. 0.99

01:48:04.000 Why are you going into some fucking sort of debt? 1.00

01:48:06.000 Or why are you even spending any of your money on this shit? 1.00

01:48:10.000 And you... 1.00

01:48:11.000 It's just unreasonable to me.

01:48:15.000 It's just...

01:48:17.000 You have some very rigid ideas of what should and shouldn't happen.

01:48:21.000 Why would...

01:48:22.000 It just... 0.99

01:48:23.000 I've seen so many people spend a bunch of money on a wedding and go back to the same motherfucking apartment that they would... 0.99

01:48:31.000 This... 1.00

01:48:32.000 You're...

01:48:33.000 That's true.

01:48:33.000 So...

01:48:34.000 It wastes a lot of money.

01:48:35.000 You're not going...

01:48:36.000 You're not supposed to...

01:48:37.000 This wedding is not supposed to enhance.

01:48:39.000 You're supposed to take a...

01:48:40.000 You're supposed to go into debt.

01:48:42.000 You're supposed to take...

01:48:43.000 Big debt.

01:48:43.000 You're supposed to work your ass off to spend $50,000, $30,000 with a person that you're already sleeping with that you already...

01:48:51.000 That you got a child by!

01:48:53.000 Like...

01:48:54.000 I'm done. 1.00

01:48:55.000 Like, I fucking hated the idea that men get fucking sucked in to this happy wife, happy life shit. 1.00

01:49:03.000 Like, so, your life is supposed to be fucking determined on this fucking emotional rollercoaster of an individual that you married to, and that's how your life is supposed to be happy, and she does a bunch of shit that don't make sense. 1.00

01:49:18.000 I paid for the wedding, but it's your day. 0.99

01:49:20.000 What?

01:49:24.000 I paid for a wedding planner that don't know neither one of us.

01:49:32.000 I plan your last surprise birthday party. 1.00

01:49:34.000 Why I can't plan this fucking wedding if I'm paying... 1.00

01:49:36.000 If I pay somebody some money to plan my wedding, you better not ask me no motherfucking questions. 1.00

01:49:42.000 You better be fucking telekinesic. 1.00

01:49:43.000 You better know what I want. 1.00

01:49:45.000 You better just fucking think of what I want. 1.00

01:49:48.000 You better ask me shit. 1.00

01:49:49.000 I better walk in and say, ooh, ice sculpture. 1.00

01:49:51.000 That's just what I wanted. 1.00

01:49:52.000 Don't ask my opinion on shit. 0.99

01:49:55.000 I just don't understand. 1.00

01:49:57.000 I just don't understand.

01:49:58.000 I'm paying for the dress. 1.00

01:50:00.000 I'm paying for the shit. 1.00

01:50:03.000 And it's an industry. 1.00

01:50:04.000 What do I get? 1.00

01:50:05.000 What do I get after I pay for all this shit? 1.00

01:50:07.000 You get to be legally entangled. 1.00

01:50:09.000 But to the same person that I already...

01:50:13.000 And if you want to break up, you got to go to court.

01:50:18.000 Congratulations. 1.00

01:50:19.000 This shit is insane. 1.00

01:50:20.000 And 50% of it goes to court. 1.00

01:50:23.000 50% of it gets divorced.

01:50:25.000 And you know what Chris Rock bit?

01:50:27.000 50% of the people.

01:50:29.000 Those are the ones that have the courage to leave. 1.00

01:50:31.000 How many fucking cowards stay and suffer? 1.00

01:50:34.000 That's true. 1.00

01:50:35.000 If you had a guess, out of all the marriages, what percentage are successful?

01:50:42.000 What percentage of the people are happy?

01:50:45.000 I think 15% of marriages in the United States are happy.

01:50:49.000 I mean, are successful and happy.

01:50:53.000 15. I bet that's accurate.

01:50:55.000 And out that 15...

01:50:57.000 Out that 15...

01:51:05.000 5% of the people have decided I'm not going to care about anything else that the person does.

01:51:12.000 I'm just going to deal with them at home when I see them. 1.00

01:51:16.000 Fuck what you do. 1.00

01:51:21.000 Nobody can come to me and tell me anything. 1.00

01:51:23.000 I saw Joe with 46 prostitutes and everybody was naked. 1.00

01:51:27.000 None of my fucking business. 1.00

01:51:28.000 He wasn't doing it at this house. 1.00

01:51:30.000 He didn't do it here. 0.97

01:51:32.000 I'm not fucking in my business. 0.98

01:51:33.000 Ali had 37 thick white gothic strippers. 1.00

01:51:38.000 Doing all type of weird shit. 0.99

01:51:40.000 Do you have it on tape? 0.99

01:51:42.000 No.

01:51:42.000 Were you there?

01:51:43.000 No.

01:51:45.000 She's not hearing it.

01:51:47.000 I'm content what happens here.

01:51:50.000 And then the rest of them are, you know, arguments here and there.

01:51:54.000 You know, we're rebuilding. 1.00

01:51:57.000 That shit. 1.00

01:51:58.000 It might be 20%. 1.00

01:51:59.000 It might be 20%.

01:52:01.000 I don't think 20% of America is happy with America.

01:52:02.000 One out of five?

01:52:05.000 Maybe.

01:52:07.000 But it's not most.

01:52:09.000 That's what's crazy.

01:52:10.000 That's the problem.

01:52:11.000 Regardless of how off we are on the percentage, it's not going towards, it's not higher the other end.

01:52:17.000 No way.

01:52:18.000 That's just period.

01:52:19.000 What is the percentage of Americans who get divorced? 1.00

01:52:23.000 Shit, 70, 80 percent. 1.00

01:52:25.000 I want to say it's at least 50. At least 50. Let's guess. 1.00

01:52:32.000 I say 50. I say 75. 70. 75. I say high.

01:52:38.000 I say that number is fucking high. 0.99

01:52:40.000 It's really, what a crazy risk if you stop and think about it. 0.98

01:52:43.000 I think you already know the number.

01:52:46.000 I don't even know how you- I'm guessing.

01:52:48.000 I'm guessing.

01:52:49.000 I think it's like 50%.

01:52:50.000 I think it varies in different parts of the country.

01:52:53.000 I think California is extremely high.

01:52:55.000 I bet in California it's in the 60s.

01:52:58.000 I think maybe in some rural land there's no divorces.

01:53:03.000 You gotta stay with your cousin! 0.96

01:53:07.000 Make the bloodline strong!

01:53:09.000 What do we got?

01:53:09.000 Make the bloodline strong!

01:53:11.000 The first statistic is interesting is they base it off of per thousand.

01:53:15.000 The marriage rate or divorce rate is the lowest it's been in a while, but it's like 17.9 per thousand.

01:53:21.000 It still goes to 50% of all marriages in the United States will end in divorce or separation.

01:53:26.000 Researchers estimate that 41% of all first marriages end in divorce, 60% of second marriages, and 73% of third marriages end in divorce.

01:53:35.000 That's hilarious.

01:53:36.000 If you're a three-time loser, and you're still getting married, you got a 73% chance of going to divorce, and you're still getting the ice sculpture. 0.60

01:53:47.000 Seafood tower. 0.94

01:53:48.000 You're still going all in with the band.

01:53:51.000 At least three places with a higher divorce rate than the United States. 0.99

01:53:55.000 Russia doesn't fuck around. 1.00

01:53:56.000 Oh my god, Russia, that is wild. 1.00

01:54:00.000 Russia quit.

01:54:02.000 It's over.

01:54:03.000 I think that's Russian men leaving.

01:54:05.000 Highest crude divorce rate.

01:54:07.000 What does that mean?

01:54:08.000 Why is it crude?

01:54:11.000 The numbers are very strange on what they're...

01:54:14.000 Because then there's also, like, now that there's same-sex marriages, there's, like...

01:54:18.000 One of these statistics is something about women getting divorced at a different rate.

01:54:21.000 Yeah.

01:54:22.000 Married women is double that, but why wouldn't you? 1.00

01:54:25.000 The divorce rate per 1,000 married women is nearly double that of 1960, but down from the all-time high of 22.6 in the early 1980s.

01:54:34.000 So, like, so...

01:54:36.000 The gay marriages last longer? 1.00

01:54:39.000 I'm just saying it's adding...

01:54:41.000 It changes the statistics.

01:54:46.000 What about gay women? 1.00

01:54:48.000 They probably get divorced fast. 1.00

01:54:50.000 That's a violent relationship.

01:54:53.000 A lot of times.

01:54:54.000 That's a very volatile relationship right there.

01:54:56.000 I have a friend who's a lesbian who's telling me that there's a gigantic issue of domestic abuse. 0.99

01:55:00.000 It's sort of like non-disgust in lesbian communities. 1.00

01:55:03.000 Oh yeah.

01:55:04.000 Because who you gonna call?

01:55:05.000 It's like a girl fight now. 1.00

01:55:06.000 It's like, my husband's with my ass! 1.00

01:55:09.000 And then Sheila comes out. 1.00

01:55:11.000 Because I was thinking that at least if you're a lesbian, the domestic abuse is off the table. 1.00

01:55:16.000 You don't get domestically abused. 1.00

01:55:17.000 Shit. 1.00

01:55:18.000 That's what I thought. 1.00

01:55:18.000 That's what you thought, shit. 1.00

01:55:21.000 Look at your face! 1.00

01:55:22.000 I thought domestic abuse was just men. 1.00

01:55:24.000 I've been to a lesbian club before and seen them motherfuckers out there fighting after that club behind each other. 1.00

01:55:30.000 Shit. 1.00

01:55:31.000 That's what you don't. 1.00

01:55:32.000 You'd rather break up a man, two men fighting, than two women fighting. 0.98

01:55:37.000 Oh my goodness.

01:55:38.000 Really?

01:55:38.000 It's so vicious.

01:55:40.000 It's so vicious. 0.99

01:55:40.000 A lesbian fight is a vicious fight. 0.99

01:55:44.000 I would rather... 0.99

01:55:46.000 A lesbian fight is way more brutal than a... 1.00

01:55:52.000 Gay man fight. 0.99

01:55:54.000 Really? 0.99

01:55:55.000 Oh, gay man fight is different. 0.75

01:55:57.000 And I'm not saying gay men can't fight, because I know when I was locked up, I already tell people about this story, this dude named Sugar.

01:56:04.000 And when they hear the story, they're like, oh, he's gay, his name, they call him Sugar.

01:56:12.000 That's not why we called him Sugar.

01:56:14.000 It had nothing to do with his sexual orientation.

01:56:17.000 Sugar was...

01:56:19.000 We named him after Sugar Ray Robinson. 0.69

01:56:21.000 Sugar Ray Leonard, goddammit. 0.99

01:56:23.000 That motherfucker was fast because he used to box out of West Dallas. 1.00

01:56:27.000 And that motherfucker's hands was fast. 1.00

01:56:29.000 And if you say some slick shit to Sugar, he'll knock your ass out. 1.00

01:56:33.000 That's why we called him Sugar. 1.00

01:56:34.000 And he knocked this dude out in the shower area on Ellis, too.

01:56:38.000 And told him, he said, buy some underwear.

01:56:41.000 They was talking, and he told him to give him some clean underwear.

01:56:46.000 Because, you know, different underwear, people do, because everybody wear community, community is undergarments.

01:56:52.000 So when you get a clean pair, that's what you want.

01:56:55.000 So once you get a clean new pair, then you keep them.

01:56:58.000 You don't never give them back.

01:57:00.000 You just wash them out yourself.

01:57:01.000 So the dude wanted some new underwear, and he didn't ask for it properly. 1.00

01:57:05.000 He called Sugar a bitch. 1.00

01:57:07.000 Like, bitch, give me some fresh underwear, hoe! 1.00

01:57:11.000 And Ellis, too, in the shower area, they throw the underwear from up under this wall, so you really can't even see who's doing it. 1.00

01:57:21.000 So when he called through the bitch, and we all saw Sugar do this, Sugar looked under the thing and was like, who you calling the bitch? 0.98

01:57:29.000 So you could see. 1.00

01:57:31.000 He's like, you, bitch! 1.00

01:57:32.000 And boy... 1.00

01:57:34.000 Sugar told him, when he came around the thing, he said, man, don't fucking disrespect me. 1.00

01:57:39.000 And he called him all type of gay shit, and da-da-da-da, and Sugar said, alright, you say one more word to me, I'm gonna beat your ass, I'm gonna put my finger in your booty after I knock your ass out, too. 1.00

01:57:54.000 Man, you gotta be a hell of a fighter to fight in the shower area. 1.00

01:57:59.000 Like, the shower area is like, you got to fucking be... 0.99

01:58:03.000 A good fighter. 1.00

01:58:04.000 You gotta know what the fuck you doing. 1.00

01:58:05.000 And this ain't like you a bad fighter. 1.00

01:58:07.000 Anything can happen in the shower area.

01:58:09.000 You can slip, go over. 1.00

01:58:11.000 It's a lot of shit can happen. 0.99

01:58:12.000 This is not where you want to fucking fight at. 1.00

01:58:15.000 But, true to the character, Sugar knocked his ass out right in that fucking shower area. 1.00

01:58:25.000 Yep, sure did. 1.00

01:58:28.000 He stuck a finger in his booty? 1.00

01:58:29.000 Stuck his finger right in his ass. 1.00

01:58:32.000 While he was out cold? 1.00

01:58:34.000 Oh my God.

01:58:35.000 Woke him up.

01:58:38.000 Get the smelling sauce! 0.95

01:58:39.000 Oh my God.

01:58:43.000 That's a funny thing to say too. 0.99

01:58:44.000 I'm going to stick my finger in your booty. 1.00

01:58:46.000 And now you're on a unit. 1.00

01:58:48.000 Now you're on a unit when you can't even really talk shit no more. 1.00

01:58:52.000 You ain't got no respect motherfucker to do you like this. 1.00

01:58:54.000 Hey man! 1.00

01:58:56.000 The smell of sauce, they bring it up. 1.00

01:58:58.000 Get your ass whooped, boy. 1.00

01:59:00.000 Oh, no. 1.00

01:59:02.000 That's the thing about underestimating somebody or thinking that shit all sweet. 0.98

01:59:08.000 Like somebody, it was a dude called Lucy Pearl. 0.99

01:59:13.000 He was called Lucy Pearl. 0.55

01:59:15.000 And you would come to that unit and you would think, Lucy Pearl, you'd think, oh, he gay. 0.56

01:59:21.000 No, we call him Lucy Pearl. 1.00

01:59:22.000 That ain't got shit to do. 0.97

01:59:23.000 That's the nickname that he had from the street. 0.96

01:59:25.000 Lucy Pearl. 0.98

01:59:26.000 We didn't know why they fucking called him Lucy Pearl. 0.98

01:59:28.000 We just called him Lucy Pearl. 1.00

01:59:30.000 Man, get your ass beat by Lucy Pearl. 1.00

01:59:33.000 Go on, play with him if you want to. 1.00

01:59:36.000 Shit. 1.00

01:59:39.000 You ever heard of Emil Griffith? 0.99

01:59:42.000 Neil Griffith was a world midway champion back in, I want to say, the early 60s, and maybe it might have been the 50s.

01:59:53.000 Somewhere in the 60s or 50s, but there was a guy named Benny Perret.

01:59:57.000 Benny Perret. 0.99

01:59:58.000 And Benny Perret talked a lot of shit about Emile Griffith because Emile was gay. 1.00

02:00:02.000 And he said a lot of shit about him. 1.00

02:00:05.000 And Emile killed him. 1.00

02:00:06.000 Killed him. 1.00

02:00:06.000 Killed him in the ring. 1.00

02:00:08.000 See if you can find that. 0.98

02:00:10.000 See if you find that fight.

02:00:11.000 It's a horrendous beating.

02:00:13.000 He has him on the ropes and he beats him. 1.00

02:00:16.000 I mean, he beats this motherfucker to death. 1.00

02:00:20.000 Like, literally. 1.00

02:00:22.000 And this guy had been talking all kinds of shit about him being gay, and he just teased off on him. 0.99

02:00:27.000 His head's snapping back. 0.99

02:00:29.000 Look at this.

02:00:30.000 That's ferocious.

02:00:31.000 Angry.

02:00:32.000 And he just slumped down and never got up.

02:00:36.000 That was it.

02:00:36.000 He's dead.

02:00:38.000 He dead?

02:00:39.000 Oh, he's dead.

02:00:40.000 He died.

02:00:42.000 He died there.

02:00:43.000 What year was it, Jamie?

02:00:45.000 It was black and white. 0.98

02:00:47.000 So it was a long fucking time ago. 1.00

02:00:49.000 Damn! 1.00

02:00:50.000 He never got up. 1.00

02:00:51.000 He died right there.

02:00:53.000 Never stood up.

02:00:55.000 I mean, if you watch that combination, I mean, go back and watch that combination again.

02:01:03.000 I mean, Emile Griffith just beats him to death.

02:01:07.000 He gets him in the corner and just starts teeing off with uppercuts.

02:01:12.000 And it was just, the last combination, it wasn't just that he was trying to beat him.

02:01:17.000 It was like he was trying to beat him to death. 0.99

02:01:20.000 It's like he was fucking ferocious. 1.00

02:01:24.000 Damn. 1.00

02:01:25.000 I'm talking about shit. 1.00

02:01:26.000 He never got up? 1.00

02:01:27.000 Never got up.

02:01:28.000 No, he died.

02:01:30.000 Here it is.

02:01:31.000 So he gets him in the corner and this is the final combination.

02:01:38.000 He was already beaten up. 1.00

02:01:40.000 Emile Griffith was a bad motherfucker, but he just happened to be gay. 1.00

02:01:44.000 What are you doing here, Jamie? 1.00

02:01:45.000 There it is.

02:01:47.000 Boom! 0.99

02:01:48.000 Boom! 1.00

02:01:48.000 And look at the fucking ferocity. 1.00

02:01:51.000 Look at his head snapping back. 1.00

02:01:52.000 Boom! 0.99

02:01:53.000 Boom! 0.99

02:01:54.000 Boom! 0.99

02:01:54.000 And he's being kept up by the ropes. 0.99

02:01:57.000 Look at this.

02:01:58.000 I mean, just teeing off.

02:02:00.000 How many shots are landing?

02:02:01.000 They should have broke that up a long time ago.

02:02:04.000 But that was a fierce time.

02:02:07.000 Back then, they would let fights go, man.

02:02:10.000 You ever watch those old Jack Johnson fights where they didn't even let them stand up?

02:02:14.000 As soon as you picked your knee up off the ground, they'd come and punch you in the face.

02:02:19.000 They didn't even let you.

02:02:20.000 Like today, you get up, standing eight count, they brush your gloves off, stay in a neutral corner, they bring them back together again.

02:02:27.000 What year was that, Jamie?

02:02:28.000 Does it say?

02:02:30.000 It's like the Cinderella...

02:02:31.000 What is it?

02:02:34.000 Cinderella Man time.

02:02:35.000 Yeah, it was like that.

02:02:37.000 62. 1962. Beat them to death.

02:02:41.000 That wasn't that... 1.00

02:02:42.000 Shit! 1.00

02:02:44.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:02:45.000 But that was...

02:02:46.000 That was the whole...

02:02:47.000 Look at his face, man.

02:02:49.000 It might hit that pole. 0.97

02:02:50.000 He might hit that pole.

02:02:52.000 He probably did.

02:02:53.000 He probably hit that pole.

02:02:54.000 That was just a pole, too.

02:02:55.000 Like, look at that.

02:02:56.000 Oh, yeah.

02:02:56.000 Jesus Christ.

02:02:57.000 And look at that metal-ass thing. 1.00

02:02:59.000 He probably hit that shit. 1.00

02:03:00.000 Well, that wasn't the problem. 1.00

02:03:02.000 The problem was the punches.

02:03:04.000 That was banging his head the other side.

02:03:06.000 I don't know.

02:03:07.000 When he was outside the ropes and he just kept hitting them with those uppercuts, it was a horrific beating.

02:03:14.000 That was the thing about it. 0.70

02:03:16.000 It's like he had statements that he said afterwards about that guy calling him gay and calling him a bunch of gay slurs. 1.00

02:03:21.000 Damn! 0.99

02:03:22.000 That's a terrifying image of seeing the dude slumped over knowing that he's dead there. 1.00

02:03:27.000 He just got beaten to death in a boxing match.

02:03:30.000 It's pretty rare.

02:03:32.000 There's one that was close to that.

02:03:34.000 Did you ever see when Ray Mercer knocked out Tommy Morrison?

02:03:38.000 Whoo! 0.78

02:03:39.000 Oh my God.

02:03:40.000 Vaguely remember it.

02:03:41.000 One of the most ferocious KOs you'll ever see in your life.

02:03:46.000 I've seen some.

02:03:47.000 I thought Muhammad Ali.

02:03:48.000 I mean, not Muhammad. 0.97

02:03:49.000 I thought Mike Tyson had killed.

02:03:51.000 Marvis Frazier?

02:03:56.000 That was to me the scariest Tyson Tyson versus Marvis Frazier was the scariest because that was Tyson I was prime Tyson Prime and didn't quite fight for the title yet, but was on the way He was a that was ABC wide world sports days when you would tune in just to watch him execute somebody with When boxing came on TV in the daytime.

02:04:17.000 Yes!

02:04:17.000 Back in those Ray Boom Boom Mancini days.

02:04:20.000 So what happened with Ray Mercer is he was beating the shit out of Tommy Morrison and Tommy got caught up in the ropes.

02:04:24.000 So look at this. 0.74

02:04:25.000 He's caught up in the ropes.

02:04:27.000 Look at this.

02:04:30.000 I mean, he just wailed them.

02:04:32.000 And this is Ray Mercer when Ray Mercer was an Olympic gold medalist.

02:04:35.000 Oh my goodness, the power that Ray Mercer had.

02:04:38.000 Oh my god.

02:04:39.000 And look when he went down.

02:04:41.000 I mean, that was pretty close.

02:04:43.000 That looked like a dead man. 0.99

02:04:45.000 Ray Mercer could fucking crack. 0.99

02:04:49.000 Ray Mercer had one, like, sorta, it was kind of an MMA fight. 0.99

02:04:54.000 It was supposed to be a boxing match with this guy Tim Sylvia, and Ray Mercer was like 50 years old.

02:05:00.000 He was like late 40s.

02:05:01.000 And they were supposed to have a boxing match, but the Athletic Commission, that's Tim Sylvia, he used to be the UFC heavyweight champion.

02:05:08.000 And so they made a deal, okay, we'll just use only our hands.

02:05:12.000 Pause right there.

02:05:13.000 Pause it right there.

02:05:14.000 Let me just lay this out.

02:05:16.000 They were supposed to have a boxing match, And the Athletic Commission said there's no way Tim Silvey has no boxing matches, no way we can sanction a fight against Ray Mercer, who has a shitload of boxing matches, was one of the world's best heavyweights.

02:05:30.000 There's no way at one point in time he was one of the world's best heavyweights, fought everybody. 0.89

02:05:34.000 There's no fucking way we can sanction that boxing match.

02:05:37.000 And they said, well, what about if it's an MMA fight? 0.98

02:05:39.000 And they said, okay, well, that's okay.

02:05:41.000 And then Ray Mercer had to make a deal with Tim Sylvia.

02:05:44.000 He goes, look, they're calling an MMA fight, but we're just going to box with gloves on.

02:05:49.000 And Tim said, yes, that's the deal.

02:05:51.000 So then the fight opens, you know, started up again, and he kicks him.

02:05:55.000 And watch the look on Ray's face. 0.99

02:05:56.000 Like, what the fuck? 1.00

02:05:58.000 See? 1.00

02:05:58.000 He's like, what the fuck? 1.00

02:05:59.000 So watch this. 1.00

02:06:00.000 Watch what happens.

02:06:02.000 Right here.

02:06:03.000 Boom! 0.99

02:06:04.000 Timber.

02:06:06.000 I mean, one shot.

02:06:09.000 That is the difference.

02:06:10.000 Ray Mercer set out on it too.

02:06:12.000 Bam! 0.98

02:06:12.000 And he was 40s, like late 40s, maybe even 50 by then. 0.98

02:06:17.000 He was old.

02:06:18.000 Like, I'm old.

02:06:20.000 But it's people in the gym.

02:06:24.000 Main Street, boxing gym in Houston.

02:06:28.000 It's some old men in that gym.

02:06:30.000 Oh, yeah.

02:06:31.000 There's an old man at the gym.

02:06:32.000 I was in a gym in Austin today. 1.00

02:06:34.000 Shit. 1.00

02:06:34.000 A boxing gym in Austin today. 1.00

02:06:35.000 There was an old dude fucking that bag up. 0.98

02:06:38.000 This dude had to be 64, 65 years old. 0.99

02:06:40.000 Oh, it's a man.

02:06:41.000 He's lighting that bag up.

02:06:42.000 It's a man in Houston.

02:06:44.000 They call him Bird.

02:06:46.000 He has a day in Houston.

02:06:48.000 He saved some people that was in a burning building.

02:06:52.000 They was in a burning house.

02:06:54.000 He ran in and got them out.

02:06:56.000 And he was old then.

02:06:57.000 He like 70-something.

02:06:59.000 And he just, he comes around, he cleans up the gym. 1.00

02:07:03.000 And you can come in there talking shit all you want to. 0.99

02:07:06.000 You gotta realize that he has on his shoes. 1.00

02:07:08.000 Like, he has on his boxing shoes.

02:07:11.000 Every day. 1.00

02:07:12.000 He got his fucking shit strapped up to the top. 1.00

02:07:15.000 If you're not paying attention, you don't understand this old man got his shit on. 1.00

02:07:19.000 So if you want to do something, and he looks the part. 1.00

02:07:25.000 He looks like he just finished. 0.99

02:07:26.000 He fought Jack Johnson back in the day and some shit. 0.98

02:07:30.000 And that's the thing that I love about being in a gym. 0.95

02:07:34.000 Any type of fighting gym.

02:07:38.000 You monitor yourself in a gym, in a fighting gym.

02:07:43.000 Not a workout gym, a fighting gym.

02:07:46.000 Come in there with a bad day. 1.00

02:07:48.000 Come in there talking shit. 1.00

02:07:50.000 Come in there with anything. 1.00

02:07:52.000 It's somebody in there that's willing to oblige your shit any day of the week. 1.00

02:07:57.000 I don't give a damn when you come in there. 1.00

02:07:59.000 Be the dude off the street talking about boxing ain't shit and you come in there, you a big dude, you can come in there and do it. 0.99

02:08:05.000 Go! 1.00

02:08:08.000 We'll line your ass up. 1.00

02:08:09.000 Pick somebody in here. 1.00

02:08:10.000 Pick whoever you think in this goddamn gym you can handle. 1.00

02:08:14.000 Shit. 1.00

02:08:15.000 And we watch him fall every time. 1.00

02:08:18.000 Oh, yeah.

02:08:18.000 Oh, you picked the little Mexican guy.

02:08:21.000 Okay, cool.

02:08:22.000 Good luck. 1.00

02:08:22.000 Good luck with this little five-foot motherfucker. 1.00

02:08:26.000 You don't understand. 1.00

02:08:27.000 You about to fight fucking Joe Frazier. 1.00

02:08:29.000 You have no idea that you about to fucking fight Frazier. 1.00

02:08:31.000 You about to fight a fucking Spanish Frazier that ain't got no fucking pushback or the leg! 1.00

02:08:41.000 That shit is full steam ahead! 1.00

02:08:43.000 Did you ever see that video? 1.00

02:08:46.000 There's an old man in a sweater, like a bald old man in a sweater who beats the fuck out of this young kid who looks jacked. 0.98

02:08:54.000 This young dude looks like he does CrossFit. 0.99

02:08:56.000 He's like 25 years old, ripped.

02:08:59.000 This old dude's gotta be 65 years old.

02:09:01.000 And he pounds the gloves. 0.99

02:09:03.000 Fucking hits himself in the head a couple times, comes out bobbing and weaving, and you're like, what? 0.99

02:09:06.000 What is happening? 1.00

02:09:08.000 Like, it doesn't even look real.

02:09:09.000 Like, you look at this old guy, he's got bad posture, he's got a sweater on, but as soon as he gets those gloves on, with a sweater, wearing a sweater, beats the fuck out of this guy.

02:09:18.000 Like, the thing only lasts, like, 20 seconds.

02:09:22.000 You know that video?

02:09:23.000 You know the video, right?

02:09:24.000 It's a pretty famous video, because it's hilarious.

02:09:26.000 Here it is.

02:09:27.000 So look at this young guy. 1.00

02:09:28.000 He's got a fucking man bun. 1.00

02:09:30.000 Look at him, all jacked and shit. 1.00

02:09:32.000 Look at this old guy with a sweater on. 1.00

02:09:35.000 I've never even seen this one.

02:09:37.000 Oh, watch this.

02:09:37.000 He thinks it's funny.

02:09:39.000 The young guy thinks it's funny.

02:09:40.000 Okay, I'll box you.

02:09:42.000 Watch this old dude. 0.99

02:09:44.000 He gives himself a couple shots in the face. 1.00

02:09:46.000 All right, bitch, let's get going. 1.00

02:09:50.000 That young kid's in trouble right off the bat. 1.00

02:09:52.000 Bad feet, everything.

02:09:56.000 So he gets up, he's not even letting him up.

02:10:02.000 He goes, okay, okay, okay, I'm done. 0.98

02:10:10.000 That old guy just beat the fuck out of that young guy. 0.96

02:10:14.000 I thought it was this other video where this dude was going around the gym bullying people and it was like Mike Tyson's son that he ran into. 0.99

02:10:27.000 Either it was Mike Tyson's son or it was some other famous boxer's son that the dude didn't know and he gets his ass plummeted. 0.97

02:10:39.000 Mike Tyson Jr.? 0.98

02:10:40.000 Is that really?

02:10:41.000 That's just what the video says.

02:10:43.000 It might not be him.

02:10:44.000 I don't necessarily think that's really Mike Tyson.

02:10:47.000 Oh, this is this guy.

02:10:49.000 This guy is known for going up to people in gyms and punching them. 0.98

02:10:56.000 You know who beat the fuck out of him in the gym? 0.98

02:10:59.000 Deontay Wilder. 0.96

02:11:01.000 Deontay Wilder's wild.

02:11:02.000 That may have been the one. 0.97

02:11:05.000 Deontay beat the fuck out of him. 1.00

02:11:08.000 He was fucking with people and then he ran into and got his ass rained. 1.00

02:11:12.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:11:12.000 Well, Deontay's one of the hardest punchers of all time. 1.00

02:11:16.000 You know, Deontay, before he lost to Tyson Fury, he had, I believe it was...

02:11:22.000 39 victories by knockout out of 40 fights.

02:11:26.000 He was undefeated.

02:11:27.000 39 by knockout.

02:11:28.000 You know how crazy that is to have 40 fights and only one?

02:11:32.000 I think it was...

02:11:34.000 Stavurn made the...

02:11:37.000 He made it to the decision in the first fight and the second fight, he knocked him out quick.

02:11:41.000 We had...

02:11:43.000 You know, because in the barbershop, we just... 1.00

02:11:45.000 We talk shit all the time. 0.99

02:11:49.000 And I've said that Fury was going to beat Wilder. 1.00

02:11:54.000 I took a lot of shit for this. 0.98

02:11:58.000 Was this the first fight? 1.00

02:11:59.000 I said the first and the second one.

02:12:01.000 Well, the first fight went up to a draw.

02:12:03.000 I just said he was going to beat him.

02:12:05.000 I'm going with, yes, I'm going with Emmanuel Stewart.

02:12:12.000 Yeah, this is a long time ago, too.

02:12:14.000 Look how shitty the internet footage is. 0.57

02:12:19.000 This guy's getting beat up by Deontay Wilder. 0.94

02:12:21.000 And when Deontay Wilder punches people, they stay punched.

02:12:24.000 The only one who's been able to take it, the only one, has been Tyson Fury.

02:12:27.000 He's the only one.

02:12:29.000 Everybody else he hits, like when he hit Luis Ortiz, he hit him in the forehead.

02:12:34.000 One straight right, blap, and walked away because he knew it was over. 0.99

02:12:37.000 And Ortiz, his body crumpled, and the look on his face was like, what the fuck just hit me? 0.98

02:12:42.000 That's how hard Dante Wilder hits. 0.99

02:12:44.000 You ever heard of Regis Prevost?

02:12:47.000 No.

02:12:49.000 Young fighter coming up with...

02:12:52.000 He follows Josh Taylor.

02:12:55.000 He just had a fight in Dubai with his Irish kid.

02:12:59.000 Regis is a hard-hitting lightweight.

02:13:04.000 He's 140. His hand's like cement.

02:13:08.000 You would see him hit somebody, and then you'd be hearing all these other fighters...

02:13:15.000 Oh, I have seen this dude fight.

02:13:17.000 I have seen this dude fight.

02:13:18.000 He just had a fight in Dubai. 1.00

02:13:20.000 He hit this fucking Irish boy so hard. 1.00

02:13:22.000 And I was like... 1.00

02:13:24.000 And he looked so small.

02:13:25.000 He's so awkward.

02:13:26.000 He a softball. 1.00

02:13:26.000 But that motherfucker... 1.00

02:13:28.000 And this Irish dude was in the fight, too. 1.00

02:13:31.000 He was hitting him with some good shots up until the end. 0.99

02:13:36.000 There's guys that just can fucking punch, man. 1.00

02:13:40.000 It's just fucking people who can fight. 1.00

02:13:42.000 And it's like, I'm in the gym so much and I be watching these fighters. 0.99

02:13:47.000 What are you doing, Jamie?

02:13:48.000 He's about to knock them out.

02:13:49.000 I wasn't even sure that that was the fight.

02:13:51.000 Yeah, he didn't fight.

02:13:52.000 He didn't knock Josh out.

02:13:55.000 I think Josh is the champion.

02:13:56.000 Oh, this is an hour fight.

02:13:57.000 Oh, this is not the fight I'm talking about.

02:13:59.000 I was trying to find the one you guys are looking at.

02:14:01.000 The one in Dubai where he just hit that Irish kid.

02:14:05.000 Right, it's not the Josh Taylor fight.

02:14:07.000 Who was it that he fought?

02:14:10.000 I think if you put Dubai, because I forget this kid, the Irish guy.

02:14:14.000 That's the Irish guy right at the bottom.

02:14:18.000 Tyrone McKenna.

02:14:20.000 That's it.

02:14:20.000 Irish Tyrone.

02:14:21.000 That's it.

02:14:24.000 That's a boom right there. 1.00

02:14:26.000 That shit is crazy. 1.00

02:14:28.000 Regis is fucking crazy. 1.00

02:14:30.000 Over the top. 1.00

02:14:32.000 Some people can just fucking punch, man. 0.98

02:14:35.000 Punching power is a weird thing. 0.99

02:14:36.000 Punching power is a weird situation.

02:14:40.000 And I measure you, like most boxers, I measure. 1.00

02:14:45.000 And I have a sneaky, very sneaky right.

02:14:51.000 If I catch you, if I catch you with that right, it's a problem.

02:14:55.000 You're gonna have a problem. 0.99

02:14:56.000 I don't even fuck why I catch you with that. 0.99

02:14:58.000 It's gone. 0.99

02:14:59.000 That's why the knuckle is so cracked down.

02:15:02.000 And when I hurt my hand...

02:15:05.000 I've had... 0.99

02:15:06.000 This hand has been through some shit. 0.99

02:15:08.000 I cracked my front windshield. 0.99

02:15:14.000 I punched that twice and cracked it.

02:15:16.000 Why'd you punch a windshield?

02:15:18.000 Man, this is when you argue with people, man.

02:15:20.000 That's why I had to stop.

02:15:21.000 This is very early on in the relationship where I couldn't...

02:15:24.000 I couldn't defeat her in any arguments.

02:15:28.000 She's a good arguer? 1.00

02:15:30.000 Oh, my goodness.

02:15:31.000 Because...

02:15:32.000 You can't win if you're trying to make sense. 0.99

02:15:36.000 And I remember I would be arguing with a person that said, fuck the facts. 1.00

02:15:41.000 When you argue with somebody who said, fuck the facts. 1.00

02:15:45.000 That is the last thing you want to hear in an argument. 1.00

02:15:48.000 Fuck the facts. 1.00

02:15:51.000 What are we doing then? 1.00

02:15:53.000 What are we doing?

02:15:55.000 It's like...

02:15:57.000 And you just get mad because somebody just said, fuck the facts. 1.00

02:16:02.000 Like... 0.99

02:16:02.000 We gonna argue without the facts? 0.99

02:16:07.000 Like...

02:16:08.000 Oh, okay.

02:16:11.000 In my truck, in my truck, my mechanic, my mechanic, Sam, he said...

02:16:17.000 I went and got something done, and he said, hey, I gave you a present.

02:16:21.000 I said, what?

02:16:23.000 I bent your steering wheel back up. 1.00

02:16:27.000 You bent your fucking steering wheel back like this? 1.00

02:16:30.000 Forward. 1.00

02:16:30.000 Forward? 1.00

02:16:31.000 I bent it. 0.97

02:16:32.000 I was so fucking mad. 1.00

02:16:34.000 What the fuck are you talking about? 0.99

02:16:40.000 And I hadn't got mad enough to put it back up. 0.99

02:16:45.000 So every time you're driving, it's like wobbling all over the place. 0.99

02:16:51.000 I was fucking pissed, man. 0.99

02:16:52.000 Like, so... 0.99

02:16:54.000 That's the thing. 0.99

02:16:55.000 When I'm in the ring, even when we doing the pads, James is like, oh, fucking right hand, man. 0.98

02:17:05.000 It's like my little kids, my little boy's left. 0.99

02:17:09.000 Hassan has a left hand. 1.00

02:17:11.000 That is a fucking problem. 1.00

02:17:13.000 How long has he been boxing? 1.00

02:17:14.000 Two years.

02:17:15.000 Really?

02:17:15.000 And he's just...

02:17:16.000 How old is he?

02:17:18.000 He's 11 now.

02:17:20.000 I won't let him fight yet.

02:17:21.000 The thing, it's good when they do it young.

02:17:23.000 You know why?

02:17:23.000 Because they don't hurt each other.

02:17:25.000 Because they don't hit that hard.

02:17:26.000 There's a thing about it, like, when you get them in, like, five, six, seven years old, they hit each other, but they can't hit each other like a 13-year-old or a 14-year-old.

02:17:34.000 When they get to be, like, 14, 15, they start knocking each other out, and then that becomes a problem with, like, brain damage.

02:17:40.000 But if you could teach a kid to get comfortable with, like, looking at a punch as it comes near them instead of, like, wincing and closing their eyes, those kids...

02:17:47.000 They develop fast reflexes and great counterpunching.

02:17:51.000 Yeah.

02:17:52.000 So I won't let him fight yet.

02:17:54.000 I don't want him spawning.

02:17:56.000 I just want him training, getting his thing.

02:18:00.000 So what happens is when you have...

02:18:03.000 Because he was 10 at the time, because he just turned 11. He's walking the dog around the neighborhood.

02:18:10.000 We live in a pretty nice neighborhood.

02:18:11.000 He's been living over here most of his life.

02:18:17.000 And some kids told him he wasn't...

02:18:19.000 He walking his dog.

02:18:20.000 He's just walking his dog.

02:18:21.000 And I don't even understand what kind of kids these were.

02:18:24.000 Maybe because Haris was little at the time, but he's a cane. 1.00

02:18:31.000 So he's little, but he's big.

02:18:33.000 Like, this is not a little dog.

02:18:35.000 This is a big dog. 1.00

02:18:36.000 So they're talking shit to your son while he's got a Cane Corso with him? 1.00

02:18:40.000 That's a crazy dog. 1.00

02:18:42.000 Those are wild dogs. 0.54

02:18:43.000 So he...

02:18:46.000 The dude tell him, you ain't supposed to be around here.

02:18:48.000 Hassan is confused.

02:18:49.000 Like, what?

02:18:50.000 I live around here.

02:18:51.000 Like, what's going on?

02:18:52.000 And these kids are in middle school.

02:18:53.000 Hassan is homeschooled and he's only 10. And them kids ran up on Hassan.

02:18:59.000 With the dog?

02:19:00.000 With the dog.

02:19:02.000 Hassan told Harish to sit.

02:19:06.000 Haris sat right there, and my teen-year-old went to work.

02:19:11.000 Really?

02:19:12.000 While the dog's just sitting there watching it?

02:19:14.000 And Haris just sitting there.

02:19:16.000 That's a well-trained dog.

02:19:19.000 And then after the boys started running off, because Hassan went to work, he said, get him, Haris.

02:19:27.000 And I was like, Hassan.

02:19:31.000 Everything that you did was perfect.

02:19:33.000 But you can't send Hi-Reese.

02:19:36.000 Hi-Reese was a puppy at the time.

02:19:39.000 How old was he?

02:19:40.000 Maybe eight months.

02:19:42.000 He was a puppy at the time.

02:19:45.000 Now, you can't...

02:19:48.000 I don't even think nobody even...

02:19:50.000 Hi-Reese sounds like he has a hemi in his chest. 0.96

02:19:55.000 I know when anybody comes around my house with Hi-Reese.

02:19:59.000 You can hear him.

02:20:00.000 You can see him.

02:20:02.000 It starts rumbling up before he even barks.

02:20:06.000 Those are scary dogs.

02:20:09.000 Oh, that's me.

02:20:10.000 That's mine.

02:20:11.000 That's him.

02:20:11.000 Jesus Christ.

02:20:12.000 Look at the size of him.

02:20:13.000 And I made the question high.

02:20:14.000 Quick question.

02:20:15.000 What made you jump the gate? 1.00

02:20:19.000 Can you imagine jumping a gate and seeing that motherfucker waiting for you? 1.00

02:20:23.000 Go shrink it a little bit. 1.00

02:20:24.000 Look how cool he is.

02:20:26.000 Look at his leg.

02:20:27.000 He's casual.

02:20:28.000 He's like...

02:20:29.000 Sitting to the side.

02:20:30.000 The size of him.

02:20:32.000 Yeah.

02:20:32.000 The size of his head.

02:20:33.000 He is 111 now.

02:20:37.000 He weighs 111 pounds.

02:20:38.000 Athletic.

02:20:39.000 And he... 0.99

02:20:40.000 This is the only dog I've ever seen that can fucking steal... 0.99

02:20:46.000 He can run full speed to the side. 0.99

02:20:48.000 Yeah.

02:20:51.000 We'll go out and he'll be running and I'll change directions on him. 1.00

02:20:56.000 And his fucking ligaments just steal to the... 0.99

02:20:59.000 I'm like... 1.00

02:21:01.000 You know what it is?

02:21:02.000 It's because he's not too big.

02:21:04.000 It's like there's a size that they get.

02:21:06.000 Like, I used to have a Mastiff, and they're too big.

02:21:08.000 They get like 150, 160. They're too big.

02:21:11.000 They can't move that good.

02:21:13.000 But 110, you could still move real good.

02:21:16.000 But they have so much power.

02:21:18.000 Those Cane Corsos have crazy power.

02:21:21.000 Man, he is...

02:21:22.000 Like, I had to...

02:21:25.000 Like, they'll say, oh, he's so scared of you.

02:21:28.000 He has to be.

02:21:30.000 He's not scared of anybody else in the house.

02:21:32.000 He's not scared of another single person in his house.

02:21:35.000 Me, he don't play with me at all. 0.70

02:21:38.000 He knows out of everybody in the world, I'm the only one that'll kill him. 1.00

02:21:41.000 Like, with my bare fucking hands. 1.00

02:21:43.000 He know. 1.00

02:21:46.000 And I went and talked to somebody.

02:21:51.000 It's me.

02:21:52.000 It wasn't just him.

02:21:53.000 It was me. 0.99

02:21:54.000 Haris was digging, and I got on his ass about digging, and I popped him, and he ran to his house, and I went over to talk to him, and I'm like, yo, man, I told you about this goddamn digging, and he postured up like he was going to attack, like he had it. 0.99

02:22:16.000 And in a second, I was in his house. 0.99

02:22:22.000 I was in his doghouse.

02:22:24.000 And I had already grabbed his neck.

02:22:26.000 And I had him up against the wood in the back of his doghouse. 1.00

02:22:29.000 And like, yo, who the fuck are you showing your fucking teeth to? 1.00

02:22:33.000 And he was looking at me like, get your ass out of my house. 1.00

02:22:37.000 Like, you ain't supposed to be in here. 1.00

02:22:38.000 Like, yo, what the fuck is wrong with you? 1.00

02:22:43.000 Get out of my house. 1.00

02:22:43.000 Shit. 1.00

02:22:44.000 And at the time, I was looking like, I'm not scared of shit when you're in the wrong. 1.00

02:22:54.000 He's 110 pounds. 1.00

02:22:55.000 He know I throw his motherfucking ass over the gate. 1.00

02:23:00.000 I've picked this dog up with one hand by his collar and I have my thumb up on his leash. 1.00

02:23:05.000 I'm like, yo, man, who the fuck are you playing with? 0.99

02:23:08.000 Who are you playing with? 1.00

02:23:09.000 And he's just up in the air with all his legs dangling. 0.99

02:23:12.000 I'm like, yo man, Harish, you better fucking stop playing with me. 0.97

02:23:15.000 How old is he now? 0.99

02:23:16.000 He's a year old now.

02:23:18.000 And he's lost some weight.

02:23:20.000 That's the thing about those dogs is that they do test you. 0.99

02:23:23.000 And I'm not to fucking be tested. 0.99

02:23:26.000 My friend Mark had one that bit his hand. 0.98

02:23:28.000 He had to get rid of it.

02:23:29.000 It was growling at his wife, and then he went to discipline it about something and it clamped down on his hand.

02:23:35.000 He wound up getting stitches, go to the hospital, and then...

02:23:38.000 He lucky.

02:23:39.000 He was a puppy.

02:23:39.000 He got rid of it.

02:23:40.000 No, no, it was full grown.

02:23:42.000 Full grown?

02:23:42.000 Yeah.

02:23:42.000 You know the PSI on that dog's jaws is like 700 pounds.

02:23:47.000 Whatever it is, it's crazy. 1.00

02:23:48.000 It's fucking crazy. 1.00

02:23:49.000 It's way like a pit bull. 1.00

02:23:50.000 Yeah, a pit bull ain't shit when it comes to the bite of this goddamn dog. 1.00

02:23:54.000 No, they're so much bigger than pit bulls. 1.00

02:23:55.000 Oh, man.

02:23:56.000 You know a wolf has a bite that's five times greater than a pit bull? 1.00

02:23:59.000 And he up there, this shit is up there with a wolf. 1.00

02:24:02.000 Really? 1.00

02:24:03.000 Yeah, the PSI... On that Connor is fucking insane. 0.99

02:24:08.000 There's a lot of those dogs that turn on their owners. 0.98

02:24:10.000 You know, probably raised incorrectly, but my friend, Mark, whose dog bit him, he had him very well trained.

02:24:17.000 I mean, he did everything he could.

02:24:18.000 He put him through all kinds of training, and he just had a problem with the dog.

02:24:21.000 And then I had another friend who had another carne corso, same thing.

02:24:24.000 Dog turned on him.

02:24:25.000 Now, I don't know if it's the way that they were raising him.

02:24:27.000 I don't know.

02:24:28.000 I have no idea.

02:24:29.000 But, like, you telling me that story, too, about the dog baring his teeth at you?

02:24:33.000 I don't like dogs that do that.

02:24:34.000 It's too risky.

02:24:36.000 It's too risky.

02:24:37.000 Because what if he goes to your wife?

02:24:39.000 You know, what if he turns to your kid?

02:24:41.000 Like, that's where I draw the line.

02:24:43.000 When dogs, like house dogs, like your family dog, bears their teeth at you and, like, threatens to bite. 0.99

02:24:49.000 And, like, look, I'm not the fucking dog whisperer. 0.99

02:24:52.000 I'm not home anymore. 0.99

02:24:54.000 I go on the road too much. 1.00

02:24:56.000 I can't have some wild crazy ass fucking dog in my house. 1.00

02:25:00.000 I got a golden retriever. 1.00

02:25:01.000 That dog's not biting anybody.

02:25:04.000 Ever.

02:25:05.000 Ever.

02:25:05.000 He's the sweetest dog in the world.

02:25:07.000 He just gives you kisses.

02:25:11.000 My role manager, Dre, you met him. 1.00

02:25:13.000 His dog fucking hates me. 1.00

02:25:15.000 Why? 1.00

02:25:15.000 His dog in the cage. 1.00

02:25:19.000 Fucking crazy ass dog. 1.00

02:25:21.000 You know what the scariest dogs are to me? 1.00

02:25:23.000 Belgian Malinois.

02:25:24.000 Oh, it's one named Rex.

02:25:30.000 He's so much taller than my dog. 0.95

02:25:32.000 My dog's a big-ass dog, but that's a big-ass dog.

02:25:35.000 Most Belgian Malinois aren't big. 1.00

02:25:37.000 No, his shit is a... 1.00

02:25:39.000 Really? 1.00

02:25:39.000 Oh, man, this black-ass face on this dog. 1.00

02:25:42.000 And I think he don't cut his hair like that. 0.99

02:25:45.000 Like, he don't...

02:25:46.000 Like, I've seen him where they head be low. 1.00

02:25:47.000 His shit hang at the bottom. 1.00

02:25:49.000 This dog and his tail is... 1.00

02:25:51.000 I'm like, yo, this is a big-ass dog. 0.99

02:25:53.000 It's a big-ass dog. 0.99

02:25:53.000 Like, when I see him, I'm like, yo, that's a big-ass dog. 0.99

02:25:56.000 They have these ones that they train, like, for... 0.96

02:25:59.000 Drugs and... 1.00

02:25:59.000 Yeah, all kinds of shit. 1.00

02:26:00.000 And they train them for, like, tactical things. 0.99

02:26:03.000 And there's one Belgian mama that jumps off this dude's back and jumps into the air to grab a tire. 1.00

02:26:09.000 And the thing is flying.

02:26:11.000 It's going like...

02:26:12.000 It looks like it jumped 30 feet in the air.

02:26:14.000 I can't even believe how high it jumped.

02:26:16.000 Have you ever seen those, Jamie?

02:26:18.000 Oh, you ever seen this thing on a...

02:26:21.000 Watch this.

02:26:21.000 This right here.

02:26:22.000 Like, what the fuck, man? 1.00

02:26:23.000 What the fuck, dude? 1.00

02:26:25.000 That's got to be 20 feet. 1.00

02:26:27.000 Yeah, this stick right here.

02:26:28.000 That's crazy. 0.99

02:26:29.000 This stick right here is fucking insane. 0.99

02:26:30.000 And that's crazy. 0.99

02:26:32.000 And see, that dog...

02:26:33.000 Look at this.

02:26:35.000 I mean, that is insane.

02:26:36.000 He's flying!

02:26:37.000 He's flying!

02:26:39.000 I mean, that doesn't even seem like he should be able to do that. 1.00

02:26:42.000 Why would you train this dog to do this crazy shit? 1.00

02:26:45.000 Because they can jump over fences. 1.00

02:26:47.000 They can do shit that other dogs... 0.99

02:26:49.000 Look, he's got a cape on. 1.00

02:26:50.000 They can do shit that other dogs just can't do in terms of athletic... 0.99

02:26:54.000 Look at this lander. 0.99

02:26:55.000 Well, their athletic ability is just...

02:26:58.000 Watch this.

02:26:58.000 Off the tree, and he does a flip.

02:27:02.000 Look at that shit! 1.00

02:27:03.000 And grabs a hold of the rope. 1.00

02:27:04.000 He gotta catch him. 1.00

02:27:05.000 You better catch your goddamn dog. 1.00

02:27:07.000 Yeah, you gotta catch him. 1.00

02:27:08.000 Yeah, otherwise he's gonna break his legs.

02:27:09.000 Look at him run up the tree like that.

02:27:11.000 I mean, that is bananas, man.

02:27:12.000 So it's a cane.

02:27:14.000 It's kind of that they have running up this wall to chase this thing. 1.00

02:27:18.000 Like, that shit. 1.00

02:27:19.000 That is a smart dog, just to be able to figure out how to do that. 1.00

02:27:23.000 Like, how would you even train your dog to run up a wall and then kick back backwards and flip? 1.00

02:27:29.000 Look at this shit. 1.00

02:27:29.000 Look at the amount of fucking height that they can get off the top of that wall. 1.00

02:27:32.000 Two touches. 0.99

02:27:34.000 It's amazing.

02:27:35.000 They're exceptional dogs. 1.00

02:27:37.000 Like, if one of those is chasing you, you're fucked. 1.00

02:27:39.000 They're not that big. 1.00

02:27:41.000 Dogs like that, they're like 60 pounds.

02:27:43.000 It doesn't matter.

02:27:44.000 They get you.

02:27:44.000 They're ripping the tendons off your arms.

02:27:47.000 I need to send you a picture of this crazy-ass dog that's off the lake. 0.99

02:27:50.000 When I see him, I'm gonna fold you a picture of this big-ass dog. 0.99

02:27:54.000 His face is just black. 0.99

02:27:55.000 He red, though.

02:27:56.000 He'd just be looking at you like...

02:27:58.000 Maybe he's mixed with something.

02:27:59.000 Maybe he's got, like, German Shepherd in him or something.

02:28:00.000 He's a big Shepherd. 1.00

02:28:02.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

02:28:03.000 It's a guy in our neighborhood. 1.00

02:28:06.000 He has a Kane and a Great Dane mixed.

02:28:11.000 Mixed? 0.88

02:28:11.000 Oh my god. 0.88

02:28:12.000 It's a moose.

02:28:13.000 It's like a moose.

02:28:16.000 And then what makes him look way iller, he has a clipped lip.

02:28:20.000 His lips are clipped, so it shows a portion of his top teeth.

02:28:24.000 Like he walking, you just see them teeth right there. 1.00

02:28:27.000 And I was like, I said, your dog look vicious and shit. 1.00

02:28:30.000 He's like... 1.00

02:28:31.000 He said, man, this dog is Scooby-Doo.

02:28:33.000 He said, if something scare him, I'd rather let the leash go than to try to hold on to it because he's just going to run. 0.99

02:28:41.000 He's just going to fucking run. 0.99

02:28:42.000 Run away. 1.00

02:28:43.000 He's Scooby-Doo.

02:28:44.000 He said, he look big. 0.97

02:28:46.000 If you jumped the gate and you saw him and he was standing there, you're like, oh shit, and his teeth is already showing on the side, you're like, oh, I'm out of here. 0.99

02:28:53.000 They're doing weird shit with pit bulls now. 0.99

02:28:55.000 I've seen some pit bulls now that are like short dogs that are just fucking, they look like Ronnie Coleman. 0.99

02:29:02.000 The XLs, what they call them, XL bullies. 0.99

02:29:05.000 140 pounds, like pit bulls, 140 pounds. 1.00

02:29:08.000 With a Lou Ferrigno chest, like some goddamn dog is this. 0.99

02:29:12.000 They used to be little. 0.99

02:29:14.000 Pitbulls, when they used to fight them, they would fight them. 1.00

02:29:16.000 They were like 35 pounds, 40 pounds.

02:29:18.000 They wanted them little because they could pull them off the other dog.

02:29:21.000 They wanted to be able to carry them.

02:29:22.000 It's jacked up.

02:29:24.000 That's a puppy.

02:29:25.000 That's a puppy.

02:29:26.000 He got shoulders.

02:29:26.000 He got human shoulders.

02:29:28.000 That looks like a bodybuilder. 0.92

02:29:30.000 Right?

02:29:31.000 They get so big.

02:29:32.000 Look at the size of them.

02:29:33.000 Oh, have you ever seen that one, The Hulk?

02:29:35.000 Find that one, The Hulk.

02:29:37.000 I think he's...

02:29:38.000 I mean, he looks like he's got to be close to 200 pounds. 0.99

02:29:43.000 Look at the fucking head on that one on the far right. 0.98

02:29:45.000 XL Pitbulls, XLMonsterBullies.com. 1.00

02:29:48.000 Look at the head on that fucking dude. 1.00

02:29:50.000 What are they doing to these goddamn dogs? 1.00

02:29:51.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:29:52.000 Jesus Christ.

02:29:54.000 Yeah, that...

02:29:54.000 Look at the size of him.

02:29:55.000 That's The Hulk. 0.71

02:29:57.000 175 pounds. 1.00

02:29:58.000 Look at the fucking head on him. 1.00

02:30:01.000 What the fuck is that? 1.00

02:30:03.000 Is that Photoshop? 1.00

02:30:05.000 A little of the perspective.

02:30:06.000 It's a perspective thing.

02:30:07.000 Yeah, the guy's got the camera right up on the dog and the guy's behind him laying back on the couch.

02:30:12.000 But pull up Bruce Wayne.

02:30:15.000 Oh, what is that, a rat?

02:30:18.000 That's weird, man.

02:30:19.000 It's a pug looking.

02:30:21.000 Go to one of them on the picnic blanket.

02:30:24.000 Yeah, right there.

02:30:25.000 That's when you get a sense of the real size of them. 1.00

02:30:27.000 That is a big fucking pit bull. 1.00

02:30:30.000 But those dogs are not athletic. 1.00

02:30:32.000 Is that a girl?

02:30:33.000 The girl people? 0.97

02:30:34.000 No, there's a boy.

02:30:35.000 It's a boy.

02:30:36.000 He's having puppies?

02:30:37.000 Yeah.

02:30:38.000 That's the girl with him.

02:30:40.000 Jesus Christ.

02:30:41.000 150 pound puppy.

02:30:43.000 Set to outgrow the Hulk.

02:30:45.000 What?

02:30:46.000 150 pound puppy? 1.00

02:30:48.000 What the fuck? 1.00

02:30:49.000 He's 150 pounds now? 1.00

02:30:52.000 Yeah.

02:30:52.000 I mean, what are they doing to these dogs to make them that big?

02:30:55.000 That's what I don't understand.

02:30:56.000 Like, Bruce Wayne is normal.

02:30:59.000 He's a normal king.

02:31:01.000 I've never seen Bruce Wayne. 1.00

02:31:02.000 Oh, he's a psycho. 0.95

02:31:04.000 Yes, Bruce Wayne. 0.98

02:31:05.000 Is it Connie Corso?

02:31:06.000 Yes, that's Bruce Wayne. 1.00

02:31:09.000 That's a big fucking dog. 1.00

02:31:11.000 That's Bruce Wayne. 1.00

02:31:12.000 Bruce Wayne is insane. 0.79

02:31:13.000 How much does he weigh? 0.99

02:31:14.000 Look at his head next to that dude's head. 0.96

02:31:15.000 That's his girlfriend. 0.81

02:31:17.000 That's his wife. 0.99

02:31:19.000 Bruce Wade is like 6'2". 1.00

02:31:21.000 You imagine breaking into that house and that fucking demon comes for you? 0.99

02:31:27.000 There was a famous actor who had a couple Conde Corsos and they killed someone in his yard. 1.00

02:31:36.000 Like someone jumped the fence or maybe a gardener.

02:31:40.000 Someone who...

02:31:42.000 My garden don't do it.

02:31:44.000 Who's the guy who does the Arby's?

02:31:45.000 We have the meat.

02:31:47.000 Who does the voice of that? 1.00

02:31:50.000 Damn. 0.99

02:31:52.000 I don't know. 1.00

02:31:53.000 I'm shook on that one.

02:31:54.000 But I like the voice.

02:31:55.000 Ving Rhames?

02:31:56.000 That's right!

02:31:57.000 Ving Rhames.

02:31:57.000 Ving Rhames, I believe...

02:31:59.000 Wait a minute! 0.99

02:31:59.000 Ving Rhames is a fucking Arby's voice? 0.99

02:32:01.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:32:02.000 Arby's.

02:32:02.000 We have the meats.

02:32:05.000 That's Ving Rhames.

02:32:06.000 Yeah, I didn't know that either. 1.00

02:32:08.000 Damn! 0.99

02:32:09.000 I think... 1.00

02:32:11.000 I recognize it.

02:32:11.000 You didn't recognize it?

02:32:12.000 Yeah.

02:32:13.000 2007. Was it Carne Corsos?

02:32:16.000 Or is it a Dogo Argentino?

02:32:18.000 Probably them Dogos.

02:32:19.000 Killed a living caretaker at the actor's home.

02:32:23.000 Yeah, what kind of dog?

02:32:28.000 I typed in, that's how I got to it.

02:32:29.000 It said he had four dogs.

02:32:31.000 The largest weighed nearly 200 pounds.

02:32:35.000 Numerous dog bites all over his body.

02:32:37.000 Oh, that's a bad way to go.

02:32:39.000 Oh, yeah.

02:32:40.000 Getting mauled by a dog that you're supposed to be watching in a guy's house. 0.99

02:32:42.000 The guy's like, don't worry, they won't fuck you up. 0.99

02:32:46.000 Nah. 0.99

02:32:46.000 No. 0.99

02:32:47.000 Not if that dog got to know you.

02:32:49.000 Yeah, they gotta know you really well. 1.00

02:32:51.000 That dog has to fucking know you. 1.00

02:32:53.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:32:54.000 And another thing is, I am leery, like, if my kids get in trouble, it depends on how I'm talking to them.

02:33:08.000 You don't want the dog to think you're angry at your kid like they should attack your kid?

02:33:12.000 Because he's going to defend them.

02:33:13.000 Right.

02:33:14.000 Like, that's one thing I do know about him.

02:33:17.000 He don't play about them kids.

02:33:19.000 Like, even...

02:33:20.000 I've watched him one time, just observed him, and...

02:33:26.000 My kid's running crazy, and he went by the street.

02:33:30.000 Like, he laid by the street, like...

02:33:33.000 To make sure they don't go out the street.

02:33:34.000 They don't go in the street.

02:33:35.000 He's like, y'all going too far.

02:33:36.000 That's a smart...

02:33:37.000 What is this?

02:33:37.000 Ving Rhames' dog didn't kill him.

02:33:39.000 Oh, that is right.

02:33:41.000 Now I remember.

02:33:42.000 I think he had a heart attack.

02:33:44.000 Yeah, so there's dog bites on his body, but the bites didn't kill him.

02:33:47.000 Well, what does that mean, though?

02:33:49.000 The toxicology report was, at the time, still pending.

02:33:52.000 I mean...

02:33:53.000 The dogs didn't kill him.

02:33:54.000 Maybe he had a heart attack and died while the dogs were biting him.

02:33:59.000 Right? 1.00

02:34:00.000 Because you could be like, oh my god, this is how I'm gonna die and have a fucking heart attack. 0.99

02:34:05.000 This leads us to believe that he went down for some other medical reason. 0.98

02:34:08.000 He said, when animals attack humans or other animals, the victims usually end up with bites around the head and neck.

02:34:15.000 He had none.

02:34:16.000 Oh, well maybe he had a heart attack or maybe he had a stroke or a seizure or something.

02:34:22.000 He was like spazzing out and the dogs attacked his body.

02:34:25.000 I know one thing.

02:34:30.000 The people, when you get a birthday sign put up, for your kids, happy birthday, we had a sign done in front of the house.

02:34:39.000 And they came to get the sign.

02:34:42.000 But we wasn't home. 0.99

02:34:44.000 And the dog was like, what the fuck is y'all doing around here? 0.99

02:34:49.000 I don't know y'all. 1.00

02:34:50.000 And got out that gate, and it was like, in front of the house like, y'all, Get y'all ass in that truck. 0.89

02:34:58.000 So they was in the truck just trying to get... 0.71

02:35:00.000 And they had to call like, hey, are y'all close?

02:35:04.000 Because y'all...

02:35:05.000 And he was a baby.

02:35:06.000 He was still a baby. 0.99

02:35:08.000 Like, get y'all ass from around here. 0.99

02:35:10.000 Like, y'all don't belong over here. 0.99

02:35:13.000 And we pulled up.

02:35:14.000 He just in the yard just...

02:35:16.000 Sitting there, turning his head.

02:35:18.000 Anytime he turns his head to the side, he's trying to figure it out.

02:35:20.000 Like, oh, this is my people.

02:35:22.000 Y'all know them?

02:35:26.000 Okay.

02:35:27.000 We're all cool?

02:35:28.000 We good?

02:35:29.000 Okay.

02:35:29.000 And my neighbor, the other day, I came out the gate, and my neighbor was doing some yard work, and his gate was open.

02:35:36.000 And he didn't know I was out there. 0.99

02:35:39.000 And he heard the gate open, and all he heard was holla, oh, shit! 0.99

02:35:46.000 And I said, you okay? 1.00

02:35:47.000 He said, ah!

02:35:49.000 Boy, I thought that dog had got out.

02:35:51.000 And because the dog had been, my son hadn't closed the gate properly.

02:35:56.000 And then he got out and he probably was running around the neighborhood and couldn't figure out which house was his.

02:36:02.000 So he just went and sat in front of their house.

02:36:04.000 And then he's on the, he's on the, they saw him on the camera and they called like, hey, um, Your baby is on our porch.

02:36:13.000 Because don't nobody go out there when Harreese is on the scene.

02:36:16.000 Harreese is... 0.99

02:36:16.000 And he's a friendly dog. 0.99

02:36:18.000 But no, people don't know that.

02:36:20.000 I get it.

02:36:20.000 Because when he come out...

02:36:22.000 He just looks too scary.

02:36:23.000 Yeah, he looks scary.

02:36:24.000 Yeah, he looks so scary with their heads.

02:36:25.000 His ears are cropped.

02:36:28.000 But the thing is, he has stitches.

02:36:30.000 That's the kind of dog that Ving Rhames had, apparently.

02:36:32.000 Oh, Presa Canario.

02:36:34.000 Okay. 0.94

02:36:34.000 That's another crazy dog. 0.94

02:36:36.000 That's another crazy-ass dog. 0.99

02:36:38.000 Yeah, all those dogs that they have developed as protection dogs, you know, those are the dogs that kind of sketch me out because it seems like those dogs need a lot of work. 0.97

02:36:47.000 That you can't just have them as a pet.

02:36:49.000 Like, I could just come home, I don't worry about my dog's mood.

02:36:52.000 You know, with those dogs, you've got to work them out.

02:36:54.000 It's like having a fighter.

02:36:55.000 Like, you've got to get his road work in.

02:36:57.000 He's got to hit the bag.

02:36:58.000 You've got to relax him.

02:37:00.000 Look at that dog. 0.91

02:37:01.000 That dog has a desire to kill.

02:37:04.000 And look at the different crops on the ears too.

02:37:07.000 It's like...

02:37:07.000 Oh, that's scary.

02:37:08.000 And I love that brindle.

02:37:10.000 That's like some of my favorite looking dogs.

02:37:12.000 Those brindle dogs that have that cool coloring.

02:37:14.000 I mean, I think that just looks amazing.

02:37:17.000 It looks like a little tiger or something like that.

02:37:19.000 And then you'll see kids with them.

02:37:23.000 My dog is a pretty cool dog.

02:37:26.000 But like I say...

02:37:30.000 If it ever is ever even a concern, like if I even inkling because of those kids, I'm not going to even play with it.

02:37:39.000 You got to go.

02:37:40.000 Yeah.

02:37:41.000 And it's like, you got to go.

02:37:42.000 I'm not going to feel no type of way about it.

02:37:44.000 And I'm going to get me a small pool, put it in the backyard. 0.99

02:37:47.000 Because the only reason we don't have a pool is because his ass is back there shitting it up. 1.00

02:37:54.000 Shitting it up. 1.00

02:37:55.000 Yeah, that's why my friend Mark got it. 0.99

02:37:57.000 Got rid of his dog.

02:37:59.000 He's like, once it bit my hand, he goes, thank God it was me.

02:38:01.000 You know, he got his hand stitched up.

02:38:03.000 He's all right.

02:38:03.000 And then got rid of the dog.

02:38:04.000 Got it put down.

02:38:05.000 But he's like, I just didn't trust him anymore.

02:38:07.000 He's like, he was just too sketchy.

02:38:10.000 And Mark is not an abusive dog owner.

02:38:12.000 He's not a mean guy.

02:38:13.000 He's a very nice guy. 1.00

02:38:14.000 But he was like, fuck this. 1.00

02:38:16.000 And maybe that's the thing. 1.00

02:38:18.000 The dog is showing dominance.

02:38:21.000 The person that I got him from, he had him for 25 years.

02:38:27.000 I always had these type of dogs.

02:38:29.000 He's like, yo, this dog You got it?

02:38:33.000 And he doesn't even call it a dog.

02:38:35.000 He said, this is an animal.

02:38:36.000 And he's a wild animal.

02:38:38.000 This is like having a bear in your house.

02:38:42.000 But it's your bear.

02:38:44.000 And he's outside.

02:38:48.000 And that's a thing about him.

02:38:49.000 I know he can get inside if he wanted to.

02:38:52.000 Because his head is so hard.

02:38:54.000 He can just run through something if he wanted to.

02:38:57.000 He's a big, strong dog.

02:39:01.000 But If you see the left, like, when I walk out, he immediately goes down, and then depending on how I'm looking, if I'm looking too mean, he'll turn all the way over his back and put his hands up like, 0.98

02:39:17.000 I don't want no fucking problems. 0.97

02:39:20.000 Like, hands up, I'm stretched out, all your abusive shit you don't have to do, I've already... 0.99

02:39:28.000 Submit it, sir. 0.99

02:39:30.000 And that's how I hit it. 0.96

02:39:32.000 Because I remember when I first checked him, I hit him in his neck. 0.95

02:39:37.000 Like a mother would do. 1.00

02:39:40.000 I hit him around his neck. 0.94

02:39:42.000 And I pulled him. 0.62

02:39:43.000 I'm like, yo, man.

02:39:45.000 Listen.

02:39:46.000 You always gonna be the underling.

02:39:48.000 Like... 1.00

02:39:50.000 You never gonna be El Capo in this goddamn house. 1.00

02:39:53.000 You never. 1.00

02:39:53.000 Can't let him be. 1.00

02:39:54.000 And when I'm out with him, he walks different than when he walks with them.

02:40:00.000 Because I can take him off the leash.

02:40:02.000 We'll be walking, and he doesn't go anywhere where he know I'm gonna have to say, hey, what you doing?

02:40:09.000 Right.

02:40:10.000 With me, it's different.

02:40:12.000 He's like, what I'm not doing is playing with him.

02:40:16.000 Because he know I don't love him like everybody else do.

02:40:19.000 Everybody else would cry if something happened to him.

02:40:22.000 Not me.

02:40:24.000 No?

02:40:24.000 No.

02:40:25.000 You wouldn't cry? 0.96

02:40:27.000 Because he knows I'm going to be the one that's going to kill him if something's going to happen. 0.73

02:40:30.000 He knows it. 0.84

02:40:31.000 He knows, like, this man, he feeds me.

02:40:34.000 He walks with me miles and miles and all the rest of that.

02:40:39.000 But he has the capability of killing me if he decides to.

02:40:44.000 So you have this feeling like you have to have this kind of relationship with that dog? 0.93

02:40:48.000 Yeah.

02:40:48.000 See, I'm not interested in having dogs like that.

02:40:50.000 I've had dogs like that in the past.

02:40:52.000 I don't do that anymore.

02:40:54.000 I would have this type of relationship with a Shih Tzu. 1.00

02:40:58.000 Understand your fucking position. 1.00

02:41:01.000 If you ever decide to bite me or do some shit that's against the order of this house, they're going to be consequences. 1.00

02:41:08.000 Right, but if you have a lab or something like that, you never have to think about that. 0.99

02:41:12.000 They don't do that.

02:41:13.000 That's why I like those kind of dogs.

02:41:14.000 When I was younger, I had a lot of pit bulls.

02:41:17.000 I had a lot of pit bulls. 0.71

02:41:18.000 I had one time, I came home, my pit bull had killed my other dog.

02:41:21.000 I came home in my living room, there was a blood bath. 0.99

02:41:24.000 Damn. 0.99

02:41:24.000 Yeah. 0.99

02:41:25.000 I had one pit bull, her name was Squeaky Fromm. 1.00

02:41:27.000 I got her from the pound, and she was a scary little dog. 0.69

02:41:32.000 She was a little alligator, like she was all head. 0.95

02:41:35.000 Her head was like that big. 0.78

02:41:37.000 And the rest of her body was like this little short-legged dog. 1.00

02:41:40.000 And she was cool until Stoneman started some shit. 1.00

02:41:43.000 And I had this other dog. 1.00

02:41:44.000 I didn't know back then you could not have two females. 0.95

02:41:47.000 Because two females will never let dominance be established. 1.00

02:41:53.000 Like, a dog who's a male, if a big male dog says, shut the fuck up, the other dog goes, okay, you're the alpha. 0.98

02:42:00.000 Females never accept that. 1.00

02:42:01.000 They don't accept it.

02:42:02.000 They keep fighting.

02:42:03.000 They separate them, they fight again.

02:42:05.000 They separate them, they fight again. 0.99

02:42:06.000 And I left these two at home, and it was my fuck up. 0.98

02:42:10.000 I should have separated them before I left the house. 0.98

02:42:12.000 And I came home, and there was just blood everywhere.

02:42:15.000 I had this, um...

02:42:16.000 Who was still standing?

02:42:18.000 Squeaky.

02:42:21.000 She was alive.

02:42:23.000 She killed that other dog. 1.00

02:42:24.000 It was horrible.

02:42:25.000 Sitting in the blood.

02:42:26.000 Now, listen.

02:42:27.000 Yeah, she was covered in blood.

02:42:28.000 She had cuts all over her face, too.

02:42:30.000 But it was awful.

02:42:32.000 It was awful.

02:42:33.000 Yeah, it made me sad.

02:42:35.000 Because I loved that other dog, too. 1.00

02:42:37.000 It was just like, God damn, you crazy bitch. 1.00

02:42:39.000 Squeaky was still alive. 1.00

02:42:41.000 One bitch in his house. 1.00

02:42:43.000 That's it! 1.00

02:42:44.000 So I put her down. 1.00

02:42:45.000 Damn! 0.99

02:42:46.000 Yeah, I'm like, uh-uh. 1.00

02:42:47.000 I'm not having a dog that kills dogs at my house.

02:42:51.000 You put her in a position, though.

02:42:53.000 No, I didn't.

02:42:54.000 She put herself in that position.

02:42:58.000 It's just I can't have that.

02:43:00.000 I just can't have that. 1.00

02:43:02.000 That's just too fucked up. 0.99

02:43:04.000 So if you're okay with a lab, Yeah, they're easy. 0.99

02:43:08.000 They're friendly.

02:43:09.000 Do they pee in the house?

02:43:10.000 All dogs do that until you teach them.

02:43:13.000 But they don't now.

02:43:13.000 Like, my dog never shits in the house.

02:43:15.000 Unless he got diarrhea.

02:43:17.000 Like, sometimes I don't hear him.

02:43:18.000 Like, I'm in the bedroom right here.

02:43:21.000 And by the time I get out to the living room, it's like, what in the morning? 0.99

02:43:23.000 What the fuck is going on? 0.99

02:43:24.000 It's too late. 1.00

02:43:25.000 Just splatter. 1.00

02:43:26.000 Just fucking dookie butt splatter all over the place. 1.00

02:43:30.000 Oh, no! 1.00

02:43:31.000 It's horrible. 1.00

02:43:32.000 And he always shits on carpets, too. 0.99

02:43:34.000 It'll be like some hardwood floor that you can clean up nice and easy. 0.98

02:43:37.000 Nope.

02:43:38.000 Finds his way to a carpet and just blasts all over the carpet.

02:43:44.000 It's horrible.

02:43:45.000 It's like...

02:43:46.000 With Haris, I can tell when he has diarrhea.

02:43:51.000 Because it don't just be one lump. 1.00

02:43:53.000 It's like he done walked the shit all over the back. 0.99

02:43:55.000 Yo, I'm like... 0.99

02:44:00.000 The crazy thing is they're eating the same thing, but with Marshall, it's like every now and then he'll kill something outside and that's usually when he gets diarrhea.

02:44:07.000 Like he'll eat a squirrel or something like that.

02:44:11.000 Wait a minute. 0.99

02:44:13.000 This one is nut-ass diarrhea because they Like a hog. 1.00

02:44:21.000 Oh, they burrow with their nose? 0.99

02:44:23.000 Yes.

02:44:24.000 So he eat frogs.

02:44:25.000 Oh, really?

02:44:26.000 He digs up frogs and he eats them.

02:44:30.000 You can see him doing it. 1.00

02:44:32.000 And his goddamn stomach after that was... 1.00

02:44:38.000 You mentioned Tyree and you could have to eat a fucking frog. 1.00

02:44:41.000 I thought he ate some shit that was really bad. 1.00

02:44:45.000 Whatever he ate fucked his hair up. 1.00

02:44:47.000 He had a splash in his face and on his back and on his foot. 0.95

02:44:52.000 His hair would just fall out in a circle. 1.00

02:44:54.000 I was like, yeah, you need to eat some bad shit out here fucking around. 1.00

02:44:59.000 And his stool was so loose. 1.00

02:45:02.000 Even when I walked, it was just shit going down the street. 0.99

02:45:07.000 You could just feel what a frog would do. 1.00

02:45:10.000 If you thought about swallowing, chewing, swallowing a frog, what that would do to your asshole, just how it would make its way through your intestines, just He toxin his ass up. 1.00

02:45:22.000 I know he's just like, every toxin that frog has, he's just released on his ass and shitting it like, yeah, good. 1.00

02:45:28.000 It's funny how all animals, like all those kind of animals that are meat eaters, they all have this desire to kill things. 0.99

02:45:34.000 They all want to kill something small. 1.00

02:45:36.000 Whether it's a bird or a squirrel or a rabbit, they all want to kill shit. 1.00

02:45:40.000 They all do. 1.00

02:45:41.000 They can't help themselves.

02:45:43.000 He was about to die.

02:45:46.000 We was on a walk and My son had ran down this hill. 1.00

02:45:51.000 And when he got up the hill, it was a fucking snake. 1.00

02:45:55.000 It was like bronze on the body. 0.99

02:45:58.000 It was black and he had these spots.

02:45:59.000 And I know it was poison because his head was in the diamond.

02:46:02.000 And my daughter was about to run. 1.00

02:46:04.000 And my son said, Snake, Daddy! 1.00

02:46:06.000 And I had to walk right into the shit. 1.00

02:46:08.000 And I stopped my girls. 1.00

02:46:12.000 And I stopped everybody. 1.00

02:46:13.000 But who I can't stop is the fucking crazy ass dog. 1.00

02:46:16.000 So the dog runs up on the snake and he... 1.00

02:46:19.000 So he just...

02:46:21.000 He want to kill it. 0.99

02:46:22.000 I'm like... 0.79

02:46:22.000 So the snake... 0.79

02:46:23.000 I can see him open his mouth and he looking like he can lunge.

02:46:27.000 So I took this stick and I hit him so he wouldn't go down.

02:46:31.000 And...

02:46:31.000 And he...

02:46:33.000 He took off. 1.00

02:46:35.000 I say, Hyreese, you almost fucking die. 1.00

02:46:37.000 This snake was gonna bite your ass up. 1.00

02:46:38.000 They don't die. 1.00

02:46:39.000 I've had multiple dogs get bit by rattlesnakes.

02:46:42.000 They don't die. 1.00

02:46:44.000 No shit? 1.00

02:46:44.000 No, you take them to the vet and they give them anti-venom. 1.00

02:46:47.000 It's expensive, though. 0.99

02:46:49.000 Anti-venom is fucking expensive. 0.98

02:46:50.000 That's the whole thing. 1.00

02:46:51.000 He would have died.

02:46:51.000 But even if you don't give them anti-venom, a lot of times they survive.

02:46:55.000 He would have been...

02:46:56.000 No, no, no, no. 1.00

02:46:56.000 You give him, like, Benadryl and shit, I'm telling you. 1.00

02:46:59.000 Like, they don't die. 1.00

02:47:01.000 People die a lot quicker than a dog dies from rattlesnake bites.

02:47:06.000 They can die, but most of the time they don't.

02:47:08.000 I had three dogs bit by rattlesnakes.

02:47:11.000 My dog...

02:47:13.000 I'm not saying he would have died. 1.00

02:47:14.000 It's some things that he's eaten that that motherfucker would have been down. 1.00

02:47:19.000 He'd have just been down, and I thought he was going to die. 1.00

02:47:22.000 I was like, oh, he's dead.

02:47:23.000 I'm going to wake up tomorrow.

02:47:24.000 That's probably what would have happened.

02:47:25.000 He'd have just been in the yard.

02:47:28.000 I'd have heard about what happens is their face swells up.

02:47:31.000 It looks crazy It's just like like my dog Frankie got bit in his face and his face like drooped out like this like And I had taken him to the vet and I said to the vet I go I think he got bit by a rattlesnake because he had been bit before because he killed his rattlesnake and I'm like I'm Guessing that he got bit and so the vets like I don't see any holes.

02:47:50.000 I don't see any bite marks So he's examining him probably bit him in the face.

02:47:54.000 Oh Yeah, so I take him home. 1.00

02:47:56.000 I go, you got lucky, bitch. 1.00

02:47:57.000 And then I look at him like an hour later, and his face is drooping. 1.00

02:48:01.000 I'm like, ah, shit. 0.90

02:48:02.000 And so I had to bring him back to the vet, and the vet's like, yeah, I guess there's like a tiny mark, because we didn't see any mark, but now the way his face was drooping, it was pretty odd. 1.00

02:48:10.000 It was all swollen up and shit, fucked up. 0.99

02:48:12.000 So, because my dog Burrows, he, the other day, I kind of sweep the dirt back in this little spot, and as I'm sweeping, This thing, what I thought was dirt, I just pushed it, and this fucking spider, 1.00

02:48:29.000 big-ass spider, jumps up. 1.00

02:48:31.000 He's looking at me, and he's like, I'm about to kill this big-ass spider. 0.99

02:48:35.000 But he's the size, he's at least the size of a little bit smaller than this coffee cup, like maybe the bottom. 0.97

02:48:43.000 And so I'm beating him with the broom, and here come the dog.

02:48:48.000 And he's looking at me like, yo, I was going to play with that.

02:48:51.000 Like... 0.99

02:48:53.000 And I remembered his face being fucked up. 1.00

02:48:56.000 And I'm like, yo ass probably got bit. 1.00

02:48:59.000 Because a spider bite will fuck you up too. 1.00

02:49:01.000 And he had this knot that I just kept squeezing the shit out of it. 1.00

02:49:07.000 Like a zit? 0.99

02:49:07.000 Yeah, it was probably a spider bite. 0.99

02:49:11.000 Yeah, he probably got bit. 1.00

02:49:12.000 Like recluses, they'll fuck you up. 1.00

02:49:15.000 If you get bit by a brown recluse, they make a fucking hole in your body. 1.00

02:49:18.000 It causes necrosis. 1.00

02:49:19.000 You get people that have giant holes in their body.

02:49:22.000 In prison.

02:49:23.000 Oh, really?

02:49:24.000 Yeah.

02:49:25.000 They have recluses in prison? 1.00

02:49:26.000 Yeah.

02:49:26.000 In certain areas, they'll tell you, it's a spider, you get a spider bite.

02:49:32.000 And you're the first person I ever heard pronounce it like that.

02:49:35.000 Recluse?

02:49:36.000 Mm-hmm.

02:49:36.000 How do they usually say it?

02:49:37.000 Recluse.

02:49:38.000 Recluse?

02:49:38.000 The brown recluse!

02:49:39.000 That might be right.

02:49:41.000 Either way, I knew what you was talking about. 0.99

02:49:42.000 And I was like, damn, that's... 0.85

02:49:44.000 I don't, because I don't think I've ever said it. 0.97

02:49:46.000 I mean, I don't think I've ever heard anybody say it.

02:49:48.000 I've only, like, read it.

02:49:49.000 It's one of those words.

02:49:50.000 Yeah, so you probably said it right.

02:49:52.000 Maybe.

02:49:53.000 I'm not sure.

02:49:53.000 Because it made a brown recluse.

02:49:56.000 I knew a lot of guys in the Midwest who got bit by those things. 0.99

02:50:00.000 Like, one guy who got bit in the gym, and he had developed a giant fucking hole in his leg. 0.99

02:50:03.000 It was nasty. 0.98

02:50:04.000 They had to fill it up with, like, they had to take gauze and stuff it into the hole.

02:50:08.000 Yeah, you had to put an eye down.

02:50:09.000 I've seen some people who had to go through it. 1.00

02:50:11.000 It's a fucked up spider. 1.00

02:50:12.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:50:13.000 Just imagine getting bit in prison where they just leave you to yourself.

02:50:17.000 Is that what they do?

02:50:18.000 They don't give you anything?

02:50:18.000 Yeah, you have to tend to it yourself.

02:50:20.000 They don't give you any antibiotics or anything? 0.99

02:50:21.000 They give you the galls and shit. 0.99

02:50:25.000 You gotta take the medicine, but you have to dress it. 1.00

02:50:27.000 Keep dressing it yourself.

02:50:28.000 They don't have prison boxing programs anymore, huh?

02:50:32.000 Nah.

02:50:32.000 I wish they did.

02:50:34.000 That'd probably help people.

02:50:36.000 Well, I think it helped people back in the day.

02:50:37.000 I mean, that's how Sonny Liston became a boxer. 0.99

02:50:39.000 Yeah, they don't do shit for people in prison. 0.99

02:50:43.000 They don't do shit for you. 1.00

02:50:44.000 Unless you're a fucking rapist or molester. 1.00

02:50:47.000 Then they roll out the red carpet for you to keep you fucking safe from other people. 1.00

02:50:52.000 That's crazy. 1.00

02:50:53.000 It is crazy.

02:50:54.000 Yeah, I think they should do...

02:50:56.000 Look, first of all, how many people get reformed in prison?

02:51:00.000 Right?

02:51:01.000 You just get reformed by the fact that you don't ever want to do it again.

02:51:04.000 But it's not like...

02:51:05.000 Is there programs that are trying to rehabilitate you and make you a better person and give you tools to manage your anger?

02:51:15.000 Is there any of that in there?

02:51:16.000 Forcefully or that you can do to pass time?

02:51:20.000 Due to past time, like, have available to you.

02:51:23.000 You can take, um, depending on what unit you own.

02:51:27.000 They offer different things according to the units.

02:51:31.000 And depending on your status, too.

02:51:34.000 Like, if you have anger management, you can't go to the cognitive intervention class.

02:51:39.000 Which you should be.

02:51:40.000 You should be the person that's going to the cognitive intervention class.

02:51:42.000 But you own a... 0.97

02:51:45.000 A side of the prison that's closed custody where y'all wild and shit, they feel like you're not ready to reform yourself because you on that side of the unit. 0.98

02:51:53.000 Then maybe you get on the other side of the unit in a different class and you'll go... 0.98

02:51:59.000 And I went to cognitive intervention class.

02:52:02.000 I went to classes.

02:52:05.000 I went to things. 0.99

02:52:06.000 Even when I didn't need them, I still went past the time and learned other shit. 0.99

02:52:12.000 So... 0.99

02:52:13.000 That's what you learn.

02:52:14.000 You go into places and you go in these counseling groups. 1.00

02:52:17.000 You don't even need the shit. 0.99

02:52:18.000 You go in there and go, oh, this is interesting to listen to. 1.00

02:52:20.000 And then you figure out shit about yourself at the same time in prison. 1.00

02:52:24.000 Most people don't do all that shit. 1.00

02:52:27.000 You got to be a special person who decides you want to change your mentality from the old shit that you used to do. 0.99

02:52:36.000 Don't you think, I mean, like, if they had boxing programs, I think the worry would be that you teach people how to box and they would fuck up the guards or they would fuck each other up, but I think... 0.99

02:52:46.000 They do that anyway. 0.94

02:52:47.000 They do that anyway.

02:52:48.000 Right.

02:52:49.000 But wouldn't it be, like, a good way to at least get out your anger and frustration, give you some discipline, and maybe settle disputes?

02:52:59.000 Settle a lot.

02:53:00.000 That would be the main thing, to settle a lot of disputes.

02:53:02.000 Yeah, saddle it like a man. 0.88

02:53:04.000 Instead of sneaking up on each other, stabbing each other.

02:53:06.000 Or getting a group.

02:53:10.000 That's the one thing about anything with me.

02:53:12.000 I don't give you no...

02:53:16.000 You don't get any credit if you or your friends jumped on somebody. 1.00

02:53:20.000 That's the weakest shit in the world. 1.00

02:53:22.000 Or you snuck up on somebody and hit them. 1.00

02:53:26.000 That's some weak shit. 1.00

02:53:27.000 It's weak shit for sure. 1.00

02:53:29.000 What's wrong with the fat one? 1.00

02:53:32.000 If you feel like you can win, just orchestrate it. 1.00

02:53:38.000 You know, be a gentleman about this shit. 0.99

02:53:40.000 I don't give a damn if it's 10 paces in turn. 0.99

02:53:42.000 Just do the shit fair where I can respect you for. 0.99

02:53:46.000 I can't respect anybody who, I'ma go get another person and we're gonna come jump on Joe and then Joe Luther and we feel like that's a win. 0.99

02:53:57.000 Yeah, we whooped Joe that.

02:53:58.000 Like, you did?

02:54:00.000 Or did you...

02:54:01.000 It's like being a... 1.00

02:54:03.000 Like, what the fuck is wrong with you, man? 0.99

02:54:05.000 That you can't fight your own battle because you scared to lose? 1.00

02:54:09.000 I learned honor from a pimp in Mississippi when I was a kid.

02:54:16.000 That's a great start to a story.

02:54:26.000 What did he teach you?

02:54:28.000 My Aunt Angelo She used to take me and my cousin, Ricky, to the store, and we would get these ice, you know the little frozen ice, the small ones.

02:54:37.000 But at this particular store, they had the giant joints, so they were like this big around, and when it was good, we could go get one.

02:54:44.000 So my aunt, she takes me and my cousin, and we're in Clarksdale, Mississippi, and we go to this store, and we come out, We in the car, and we're in the car, and she hadn't started the car yet. 0.99

02:54:58.000 She was listening to the song, and we eating that shit. 0.88

02:55:01.000 I remember this so like it was yesterday, because he had the green one, and I had the great one. 0.99

02:55:06.000 And I told him I was going to give him half of mine for half of his, just so we both had both flavors. 0.98

02:55:13.000 And as we talking, my aunt said, oh, shit, I knew I should have pulled off. 0.98

02:55:19.000 Now we can't go nowhere. 0.99

02:55:21.000 Because these two pimps We're arguing outside the car.

02:55:26.000 And we couldn't move because one of the pimps had set his hat on my aunt's car.

02:55:32.000 She set his hat on the car.

02:55:34.000 And him and his pimp was arguing. 0.99

02:55:37.000 And he said, man, I told you, don't be on my motherfucking side of the street with your hoes. 1.00

02:55:43.000 I run this area. 0.98

02:55:44.000 And I remember the dude named Bobby. 0.99

02:55:46.000 Bobby said, you don't run the motherfucking thing around here. 1.00

02:55:48.000 You know, you don't tell Bobby where to be, bitch. 1.00

02:55:57.000 And it stunned me because I had never heard another man call another man a bitch. 1.00

02:56:05.000 Or like a curse word. 0.94

02:56:06.000 It was all respect, mostly.

02:56:09.000 And they would call each other other names, but it wouldn't be curse words.

02:56:13.000 You know what I'm saying?

02:56:14.000 So I'm...

02:56:18.000 And they fighting behind the side of the street.

02:56:21.000 And when Bobby took his jacket off, he had a gun.

02:56:27.000 He had a gun host. 0.95

02:56:29.000 It was like a.38, a.32, whatever that was they was carrying in.

02:56:35.000 And his friend, he took his gun host off, suit, jacket, hat.

02:56:41.000 Another dude took his hat and his jacket off.

02:56:44.000 They got their girls out there, a dude had his partner, and they fought right in the middle of the street. 1.00

02:56:51.000 Bobby got his ass whooped. 1.00

02:56:55.000 Bobby got his ass whooped. 1.00

02:56:56.000 Bobby got his ass whooped out there. 1.00

02:57:01.000 When they was getting shit together, man walked off, he gone. 1.00

02:57:07.000 That dude was out there. 1.00

02:57:08.000 He said, Bobby, you should have popped his ass. 1.00

02:57:10.000 Because he the one that had the gun. 1.00

02:57:12.000 He said, Bobby, you should have popped his ass. 1.00

02:57:14.000 Now I remember this in detail. 1.00

02:57:16.000 Bobby said, he put on this thing.

02:57:17.000 He said, no! 1.00

02:57:19.000 That motherfucker won fair square. 1.00

02:57:23.000 Put his jacket on and put his hat on and said, shit! 1.00

02:57:28.000 My goddamn nose. 1.00

02:57:29.000 That motherfucker was quick, wasn't it? 1.00

02:57:33.000 And I always remember that story because he had a gun. 1.00

02:57:40.000 He fought that man fair and square.

02:57:41.000 There was other people out there.

02:57:43.000 And he gave him his props after he beat him.

02:57:44.000 And he lost.

02:57:46.000 And in his mind, I'm still Bobby.

02:57:49.000 I'm still me, but I lost that one.

02:57:51.000 And he beat his fair and square.

02:57:54.000 Put his gun holster back on.

02:57:57.000 That's honor.

02:57:58.000 That's honor.

02:57:59.000 That's a guy who knows how to take a loss too.

02:58:01.000 You gotta learn how to take a loss.

02:58:03.000 The only way you do is you find out.

02:58:05.000 You gotta find out.

02:58:07.000 You gotta try to win and fail.

02:58:09.000 And learn.

02:58:10.000 Is that not damn near everything? 0.73

02:58:13.000 Damn near everything. 0.92

02:58:15.000 Damn near everything in life. 0.98

02:58:16.000 Damn near everything in life. 0.97

02:58:17.000 You gotta try it. 0.90

02:58:19.000 See what it is.

02:58:20.000 If it don't work out. 0.99

02:58:22.000 But don't even feel bad about this shit not working out. 0.99

02:58:25.000 This is a try. 0.99

02:58:27.000 Man, I'm not good.

02:58:28.000 I want to try to surf. 0.98

02:58:30.000 I'm probably going to fuck up every time. 0.96

02:58:32.000 But, you know, it's like when I was on a mechanical board. 0.96

02:58:35.000 I would love to actually bull ride. 1.00

02:58:37.000 But that mechanical bull is a motherfucker too. 0.99

02:58:42.000 And I know that some part of my neck ain't prepared for a real animal. 1.00

02:58:47.000 Yeah, but the real animal, they stomp you when you're down. 1.00

02:58:50.000 Fuck that. 1.00

02:58:51.000 The mechanical bull I'll take all day. 1.00

02:58:54.000 Do you know Monty Franklin, the comedian?

02:58:57.000 No.

02:58:58.000 A guy from Australia? 0.80

02:58:59.000 No.

02:58:59.000 Really into surfing.

02:59:00.000 And he had a really interesting point the other day.

02:59:02.000 He was talking about surfing.

02:59:03.000 He said, kids today are so much better than ever before because of wave pools.

02:59:09.000 Yeah.

02:59:09.000 They go to those wave pools and they get multiple chances at waves because the waves are just always there.

02:59:15.000 You don't have to sit around and wait, try to catch a wave.

02:59:17.000 You get wave after wave after wave.

02:59:19.000 So these kids are wicked, like right out of the gate.

02:59:22.000 And I was like, oh, that makes sense.

02:59:24.000 Well, that would be the way to start. 0.99

02:59:26.000 The way to start, if you want to learn how to surf, go to all those fucking wave pools. 0.99

02:59:29.000 Because you just always get a wave. 0.99

02:59:32.000 Always get a wave.

02:59:34.000 But when you go to the real thing...

02:59:38.000 Have you surfed already?

02:59:42.000 Or are you just thinking about it?

02:59:44.000 Thinking about it.

02:59:46.000 Like Laird Hamilton, the guy who made us our coffee, the superfood coffee.

02:59:50.000 He's the man.

02:59:52.000 Laird Hamilton, he rides those big crazy waves and did all throughout his career.

02:59:59.000 I'm in the stage in life where I want to try everything that I've ever seen.

03:00:05.000 That looks cool.

03:00:06.000 That looks cool.

03:00:08.000 I think with my kid, because I want my kid to be so well-rounded and I want him to be around other kids. 0.97

03:00:16.000 I don't want my kid to go through the shit that I went through as a kid. 0.81

03:00:20.000 That my family would move around so I would live in other places. 0.99

03:00:23.000 I got different experiences. 1.00

03:00:25.000 But why the fuck y'all feel like I'm lying because you ain't did shit? 0.99

03:00:29.000 Like... 0.99

03:00:30.000 I've done things as a kid, so why the fuck am I lying? 1.00

03:00:34.000 But when you're a kid, you don't experience shit. 1.00

03:00:36.000 You think everybody's a fucking liar because you're not doing it. 0.99

03:00:39.000 I don't work that for my son. 1.00

03:00:40.000 My son...

03:00:42.000 So he speaks Spanish.

03:00:45.000 It's...

03:00:47.000 It's hard for him to be around other kids that don't speak multiple languages. 0.99

03:00:52.000 Because he wanna say shit to you, or talk, or he understands different shit, or his experiences. 0.99

03:00:59.000 To talk to him, and you ask him, what'd you do this summer? 1.00

03:01:02.000 Oh, I was in Spain. 1.00

03:01:04.000 Nah, he's fucking lying. 0.99

03:01:06.000 I was in Spain for two months with my grandmother. 1.00

03:01:11.000 That's what I did.

03:01:13.000 What did you do over spring break?

03:01:14.000 Me and my family went to Costa Rica for two weeks.

03:01:17.000 We were just kicking on the beach. 0.99

03:01:21.000 When you're around kids that don't do shit like that, or you're around kids that don't have these life experiences, then you seem like the fucking outcasts. 0.99

03:01:30.000 Yeah. 0.99

03:01:31.000 Kids that have more life experiences, like you taking your kid traveling like that, that's giant for them.

03:01:37.000 It's giant.

03:01:38.000 See different people, see the way people live in different parts of the world, you know, different foods, different, see just different cities.

03:01:45.000 Like, I've taken my kids since they were real young.

03:01:47.000 I've taken them all over the place.

03:01:49.000 Costa Rica, Mexico, Italy.

03:01:52.000 We've been to Italy a bunch of times.

03:01:54.000 Before the pandemic, we were going to Italy every summer.

03:01:57.000 I wanted them to see.

03:01:58.000 I wanted them to see the Colosseum.

03:02:00.000 I wanted them to see Rome.

03:02:02.000 I wanted them to see the Vatican.

03:02:04.000 This stuff is a thousand years old.

03:02:06.000 We're in a thousand-year-old church here.

03:02:08.000 And the little kids, when they're little and they get a feel of that, I think it adds to just overall the way they perceive life.

03:02:16.000 They have a broader access to experiences, to different kinds of things.

03:02:22.000 Just think how broad Your perspective is on things. 0.99

03:02:27.000 You've been a lot of places, but just imagine hanging around people that have done none of that shit. 1.00

03:02:36.000 And every time you bring up an experience, they're like, here goes Joe with the fabulous shit again. 0.99

03:02:45.000 He's done everything. 0.99

03:02:47.000 Hold up, hold up, hold up.

03:02:50.000 What is Australia like?

03:02:51.000 Joe knows. 1.00

03:02:53.000 Now you fucking get ridiculed for... 1.00

03:02:56.000 Life experiences. 1.00

03:02:57.000 And people don't know how significant this is, but I understand it.

03:03:01.000 Yeah.

03:03:02.000 Because I had a daughter.

03:03:04.000 My daughter's 23. She is the...

03:03:07.000 She's one of the chefs at James Harden Restaurant in Houston, 13. They call her the honey badger.

03:03:14.000 She's so fucking tough and talks to everybody fucking crazy. 1.00

03:03:19.000 When the security guard called me, the security guy at the thing, he said, man, let me apologize. 0.99

03:03:24.000 I was like, for what? 0.98

03:03:25.000 I should've known somebody who's this small and talks so much shit and tough would've been related to you. 1.00

03:03:33.000 I should've fucking known it. 0.99

03:03:35.000 Like, what's going on? 0.99

03:03:37.000 And he turns the camera.

03:03:38.000 Is this your daughter?

03:03:40.000 I'm like, yeah. 1.00

03:03:42.000 It's like, she talks shit to everybody. 1.00

03:03:46.000 In this whole place. 1.00

03:03:47.000 Don't nobody fucking play with her. 1.00

03:03:49.000 It's like, yeah, that's pretty much my daughter. 1.00

03:03:51.000 The honey badger?

03:03:52.000 They call her the honey badger.

03:03:54.000 So, she... 1.00

03:03:57.000 I've been a parent for a long time.

03:04:00.000 She's 23, so...

03:04:03.000 I remember, and I had this ability to remember being a kid and how my kids were.

03:04:09.000 I pick my daughter up from school every day.

03:04:11.000 I took her to school.

03:04:12.000 My daughter knows that she has a father. 0.99

03:04:14.000 She has been elated about this shit her whole life until middle school, until she gets to the seventh grade. 0.99

03:04:25.000 Under so much pressure of hanging with kids that did not have fathers. 0.99

03:04:32.000 My daughter started to get irritated that I would be there to pick her up because she didn't want her friends to know that she had a father because then that puts her outside the group. 1.00

03:04:45.000 Now you are at this school where you are in the gifted and talented program and you're there because you play the violin quite well.

03:04:54.000 Your violinist so you're not in the same space.

03:04:57.000 You're academically inclined.

03:05:00.000 You speak another language, you're doing this, but then you get to his place and you want to hang with a certain group of kids that don't mirror what you are actually about. 0.99

03:05:11.000 So now to have the father, you're the fucking outcast kid. 1.00

03:05:15.000 So let me try to act like I don't have no father. 1.00

03:05:19.000 Wow!

03:05:20.000 So, when I mess around and got wind of it, I'm like, so what's the deal here?

03:05:29.000 Like, what's the situation here?

03:05:32.000 And I figured out what it was.

03:05:35.000 There's a peer pressure of this.

03:05:38.000 So in life, if my daughter would start to dim her light to be around people, I had to think of myself.

03:05:48.000 Do I do the same thing sometimes?

03:05:53.000 Sometimes I don't talk about certain experiences because people haven't had those experiences and I don't even want to go into it.

03:05:58.000 Right.

03:06:00.000 Or How I visualize things or see things because I'm from a different place.

03:06:06.000 I'm from an actual different place where certain things don't fly with me. 0.92

03:06:11.000 But you're not going to understand that, so I'm not going to even fucking try to give it to you like this.

03:06:18.000 I got to give it to you another way, but people don't understand everything. 0.61

03:06:21.000 When you don't want these things for your kids, I don't want my kids to be outcasted, ostracized because they had certain experiences, so I try to give them a balance of, look, this is how people are going to treat you because you're smart. 0.99

03:06:36.000 Don't let people know that you had shit until they revealed. 0.97

03:06:40.000 You don't have to Tell people what you're actually doing. 1.00

03:06:44.000 You don't have to show anybody what you're doing.

03:06:45.000 Just sit back and let it come to you.

03:06:49.000 But don't be around people that don't add Or that you can add value to their life.

03:06:56.000 The problem with kids is when you're in school, you don't have any choice.

03:07:00.000 If you have a group of kids, you're in school, these are the kids you know, and you don't have any choice. 0.95

03:07:06.000 And if you get in bad relationships in school, bad friendships, they can set you back for a long fucking time. 0.99

03:07:13.000 You get in with the wrong group and the wrong peer pressure and, you know, one fucking wild kid that wants to go break into buildings and shit. 1.00

03:07:21.000 Boom! 1.00

03:07:21.000 Boom. 1.00

03:07:22.000 I moved out.

03:07:23.000 When I was a kid, we lived in Jamaica Plain, which was a bad neighborhood.

03:07:27.000 And we moved from that to Newton, which was a good neighborhood, when I was 14. And I just dodged all that shit. 0.99

03:07:34.000 Because all those kids that I was hanging around with when I was 13, they were all just starting to rob people and break into houses and break into buildings after they were closed. 0.99

03:07:43.000 Those were the kids I was hanging around with. 0.97

03:07:46.000 If my parents hadn't moved me to a nice neighborhood, who the fuck knows what would have happened. 1.00

03:07:52.000 A bad group of friends could change the course of the rest of your fucking life. 1.00

03:07:57.000 When parents see their kid with a bad kid, they're like, God damn it, you're hanging out with that fucking kid. 1.00

03:08:03.000 Because they know that maybe it'll work out. 1.00

03:08:05.000 Maybe it'll turn out okay.

03:08:07.000 Maybe that kid'll change. 1.00

03:08:08.000 Maybe he'll grow up and get his shit together. 1.00

03:08:10.000 Or maybe he'll ruin your fucking life, too. 1.00

03:08:13.000 Like, what's the gamble of this shit? 1.00

03:08:17.000 Like, maybe he'll change. 1.00

03:08:19.000 Nah, I don't have time. 1.00

03:08:21.000 It's like with you with the dog baring his fucking teeth. 1.00

03:08:24.000 I'm out. 1.00

03:08:25.000 Yeah, fuck that. 1.00

03:08:26.000 You know, it's... 1.00

03:08:27.000 Why risk it, man?

03:08:30.000 This is...

03:08:31.000 With your kids, man.

03:08:32.000 Exactly.

03:08:33.000 I don't even play with teachers when it comes to my kids.

03:08:40.000 I'm so particular about teachers. 0.99

03:08:45.000 In United States teachers, I get people talking about the pay and all the rest of that shit. 0.99

03:08:54.000 This is the problem. 1.00

03:08:56.000 Our educational system is completely fucked up, and they understand that. 0.99

03:09:03.000 But you only walk out for more money, but you don't walk out for a better curriculum. 0.99

03:09:09.000 That's the thing that teeter-totters would be. 0.99

03:09:13.000 If I give you more money, we still have the same fucked up curriculum. 0.98

03:09:19.000 So what do we rank in the world in education? 0.99

03:09:23.000 It's pretty low.

03:09:24.000 Compared to the amount of money we have and the amount of freedom we have here.

03:09:28.000 Yeah.

03:09:29.000 So, in Finland, we have more money than Finland.

03:09:33.000 So, my child goes to the school.

03:09:36.000 What you get?

03:09:37.000 20 minutes to eat?

03:09:38.000 10 minutes to eat?

03:09:39.000 5 minutes?

03:09:39.000 What you get to eat?

03:09:40.000 And what are you eating?

03:09:41.000 What is the nutrition in the school system?

03:09:44.000 Like, what is this teaching me?

03:09:47.000 A school cafeteria doesn't teach you how to act in society when it should.

03:09:52.000 In Finland, it does.

03:09:53.000 They sit down. 1.00

03:09:55.000 In Finland, you got a fucking five-star chef back there fixing your food. 1.00

03:09:59.000 In Finland? 0.99

03:10:00.000 But who do you have in... 1.00

03:10:02.000 I mean, you got a lady with a fucking hairnet on that's giving you processed shit. 1.00

03:10:08.000 Whatever that little food place that is delivering the food to the... 1.00

03:10:12.000 It's not even nutritious.

03:10:14.000 Then you got a teacher who really wants to be something else.

03:10:19.000 We're good to go.

03:10:27.000 We're good to go.

03:10:42.000 So, in other places, I got to go to school.

03:10:45.000 To be a teacher, I have to go to school seven more years after I graduate.

03:10:50.000 Because they got to make sure that you're a person that wants to actually educate our youth.

03:10:56.000 You're not somebody that's doing something else.

03:10:58.000 Your whole passion is to educate other individuals.

03:11:03.000 That's your passion. 0.99

03:11:05.000 And so now you have this person that's teaching your kid in first grade that got a fucking doctor's degree. 0.96

03:11:13.000 It's like going to school and all the greatest people in whatever subject is your kid's teacher. 0.97

03:11:24.000 Now you come home and you have to ask this kid what they learned because there's no homework.

03:11:31.000 I did all our work at school. 0.99

03:11:32.000 I ain't sending shit home for you to do. 0.99

03:11:35.000 You the parent. 1.00

03:11:36.000 You work all day. 1.00

03:11:37.000 Now I gotta send some shit home for you to do? 1.00

03:11:39.000 Yeah. 1.00

03:11:40.000 To explain some shit you ain't did in 20 years. 1.00

03:11:42.000 I'm gonna send him home to get the shit explained to by you. 1.00

03:11:46.000 Okay. 0.99

03:11:47.000 When's the last time you done biology?

03:11:51.000 When? 0.98

03:11:52.000 When's the last time you said, you know, some people can't even break down a fucking fraction right now. 0.97

03:11:59.000 They ain't done it. 0.96

03:12:00.000 Right.

03:12:01.000 Hey, we need to change this whole number to a fraction.

03:12:02.000 Change fractions to a whole number. 1.00

03:12:05.000 You're going to have to go get a fucking book and like, let me read this shit. 1.00

03:12:07.000 I don't remember this shit like this. 1.00

03:12:09.000 I don't remember trig like that. 0.99

03:12:12.000 No. 1.00

03:12:13.000 And I'm a fucking math person. 1.00

03:12:15.000 I'm great at math. 1.00

03:12:17.000 All forms of math.

03:12:18.000 I don't remember trig like that.

03:12:20.000 I had to go back and look at trig when my daughter asked me about it.

03:12:23.000 I'm like, oh shit, let me go back and do a retouch. 0.85

03:12:26.000 Okay, this is going to be this. 0.93

03:12:28.000 But what is the school system about here? 0.99

03:12:36.000 Like, we allow so much shit in the school. 0.99

03:12:39.000 We got so many fucked up, and then they want to go, it's the parents. 1.00

03:12:43.000 It's teach, man, it's... 0.99

03:12:44.000 It's a lot of things.

03:12:45.000 It's a lot of things.

03:12:46.000 It's like...

03:12:47.000 First of all, it's undervalued.

03:12:48.000 They don't appreciate it, because if they appreciated it, they would pay them more, and they would also make a better curriculum.

03:12:54.000 They would develop people, and they would make sure that it's a safe learning environment for people, so they would spend a lot of money.

03:13:01.000 And if it's a bad neighborhood, they'd spend a lot of money on security, they'd spend a lot of money on counselors, they'd spend a lot of money on getting the best educators, and it would be a valued career.

03:13:11.000 The problem is what you're saying, like people that take it as a second option, yeah, it's because it's not a valued career in a lot of people's eyes.

03:13:20.000 But if you did make it a valued career, if it's difficult to get, if it's a job that's hard to get, and you get paid a lot of money to do it, and these are people that are passionate about educating people, then you would change everything.

03:13:33.000 But you'd have to make it a priority.

03:13:35.000 And now today, I think, you know, wealthy people, they send their kids to private school, and private schools take a better care of it because of the money that's involved in it.

03:13:43.000 But it's a mess, man.

03:13:44.000 Public school systems, you know, I went to all public schools. 1.00

03:13:47.000 It's a mess in this fucking country right now. 0.99

03:13:49.000 It's a mess, especially Los Angeles. 1.00

03:13:52.000 Los Angeles is crazy. 0.96

03:13:53.000 The public school system is a disaster. 0.55

03:13:56.000 How much time do you actually think kids spend learning in school?

03:13:59.000 Very little.

03:14:00.000 If it's eight hours, you there eight hours, I think they actually learn, they actually, I'll give it 45 minutes of actual teaching time.

03:14:07.000 Yeah, probably.

03:14:09.000 Where they're really paying attention and really learning something.

03:14:12.000 And how much of it, this is another thing, right?

03:14:16.000 Even if you teach kids facts and stuff, how much do you teach people about tools that you can use to navigate life?

03:14:23.000 Like how to think about things.

03:14:25.000 How to draw your own conclusions.

03:14:27.000 How to establish your own perspective about something.

03:14:31.000 And how to look at something in a mindset that empowers you.

03:14:36.000 Instead of looking at things like, oh, woe is me.

03:14:38.000 Look at this like, this is an opportunity for growth.

03:14:41.000 Maybe you failed.

03:14:42.000 Maybe things didn't go your way.

03:14:43.000 But now you learn because of that.

03:14:45.000 And that is ultimately going to get you better.

03:14:47.000 You just got to trust the process.

03:14:49.000 They don't teach kids that.

03:14:50.000 They don't teach kids nothing like that.

03:14:52.000 And parents don't... 1.00

03:14:55.000 Standards have gone out the fucking window. 1.00

03:15:02.000 It's like... 0.99

03:15:03.000 And the crazy thing is, I go to a lot of places and get bad service.

03:15:11.000 Why?

03:15:13.000 Multiple things.

03:15:15.000 I'm getting served by people who never had chores growing up.

03:15:19.000 So you never knew how to complete a task. 0.99

03:15:23.000 Then I grow up, I'm getting served by a person who thinks that their fucking opinion matters about something they don't know about. 0.94

03:15:30.000 I'm getting served by somebody who doesn't want to be here and then you're not trained properly. 0.98

03:15:41.000 So Chick-fil-A, for some reason, besides in D.C., everywhere else Chick-fil-A is fucking fine besides in D.C. It's amazing that the same person that was at Arby's that could not give you fucking good service, 0.96

03:15:59.000 that was on the phone when they was taking your order, that was cussing out the back in front of customers, this same person. 0.97

03:16:09.000 Goes to Chick-fil-A and greets you when you come in to Chick-fil-A and take your order.

03:16:16.000 They're so consistent there.

03:16:18.000 What's the difference?

03:16:19.000 How are they doing that?

03:16:21.000 And they pulling from the same pool of people.

03:16:23.000 Right, same neighborhood. 0.99

03:16:25.000 How the fuck are they doing that? 0.99

03:16:27.000 You know what's also like that? 0.99

03:16:29.000 In-N-Out. 1.00

03:16:30.000 Same shit. 1.00

03:16:31.000 You go to In-N-Out, they're all super friendly. 1.00

03:16:33.000 I know they get paid real well at In-N-Out.

03:16:35.000 For fast food workers, it's a valuable job.

03:16:39.000 How do they make it?

03:16:41.000 It's like Whole Foods.

03:16:44.000 It's like Whole Foods.

03:16:45.000 I don't ever have bad service at Whole Foods.

03:16:47.000 And I don't ever have bad service at Bucky's.

03:16:52.000 Right. 0.99

03:16:53.000 Bucky's is fucking insane. 1.00

03:16:59.000 I've never been to a Bucky's and the bathroom was dirty. 1.00

03:17:02.000 Ever.

03:17:03.000 However, they have somebody that is focused on the bathroom.

03:17:08.000 That's true.

03:17:09.000 They have people that are focused on each section of Bucky's.

03:17:15.000 I know one thing.

03:17:17.000 You can't tip the cashier. 1.00

03:17:19.000 Anybody ever tell me they ever tip a cashier and Bucky, they're a fucking lie. 0.99

03:17:24.000 Because they won't accept it. 0.99

03:17:25.000 Really?

03:17:26.000 Because they tell you, no, we can't accept the tips.

03:17:29.000 So even if you just leave it there and walk away, what do they do?

03:17:31.000 They're going to tell you to take it.

03:17:33.000 What if you run out the door?

03:17:34.000 They're going to be there when you get back.

03:17:37.000 Because they make so much money at Bucky's.

03:17:42.000 They pay them really well.

03:17:45.000 So you think that's what Chick-fil-A is?

03:17:47.000 They pay them real well?

03:17:48.000 Is that what it is?

03:17:48.000 And it's a system.

03:17:49.000 It's a system.

03:17:51.000 At Chick-fil-A, you can end up owning a Chick-fil-A. The only way you can own a Chick-fil-A is if you work there.

03:17:54.000 Oh, really?

03:17:55.000 Yeah.

03:17:56.000 You gotta go.

03:17:57.000 To own a Chick-fil-A, you gotta go through the Chick-fil-A. But that man ain't fucking around with his brand. 0.97

03:18:02.000 Like... 0.98

03:18:02.000 Yeah. 0.98

03:18:03.000 And like, I didn't even complain about this Chick-fil-A on 18th Street in D.C. And it was the worst fucking custom service I ever had. 0.96

03:18:10.000 Like, I... I never even got spoke to. 0.98

03:18:12.000 They never asked me anything. 0.99

03:18:13.000 I'm like, yo, this is not a fucking Chick-fil-A. In my mind, I cannot picture this. 0.99

03:18:19.000 They don't know.

03:18:20.000 And everybody on the thing say, why don't you say something?

03:18:23.000 Why don't you say something?

03:18:23.000 You can tweet it.

03:18:24.000 And I guarantee, without me saying anything, it probably got back to Chick-fil-A people. 0.99

03:18:29.000 That fucking Chick-fil-A in D.C. They probably fixed it. 0.99

03:18:33.000 Because that shit was insane. 1.00

03:18:34.000 I've never been to Chick-fil-A. I used to go to Chick-fil-A when I was having a bad day. 1.00

03:18:38.000 I would go to Chick-fil-A just to brighten my fucking day up to get a lemonade and some fries. 0.94

03:18:42.000 You come in like, hey, how you doing? 1.00

03:18:44.000 I'm like, shh, fucking Chick-fil-A. That's a good point, though, about Chick-fil-A. And if you could apply that to schools. 0.99

03:18:50.000 Like, some schools are great.

03:18:52.000 You go there, everyone's smiling, the teachers are happy, the students have a better experience, and, you know, they're the same kids.

03:19:00.000 Blindside! 0.97

03:19:01.000 You sent those kids to a terrible place.

03:19:03.000 Blindside! 1.00

03:19:05.000 That man, Michael Orr, blindside, fucked up neighborhood, moved his environment, boom. 1.00

03:19:11.000 It's just that simple. 0.99

03:19:13.000 It is that simple.

03:19:14.000 If you change...

03:19:15.000 It's hard to be bad when everybody else in the class is doing good.

03:19:18.000 Right.

03:19:19.000 Exactly.

03:19:20.000 It's hard to have a bad attitude if everybody has a good attitude.

03:19:23.000 It's a part of the environment.

03:19:27.000 That's the thing.

03:19:28.000 You can't... 0.59

03:19:29.000 When you put somebody in an environment and it's all positive and shit is going well and people care about you and it's so much...

03:19:36.000 It's hard to be mad and you don't... 0.79

03:19:40.000 Like, what you mad about? 1.00

03:19:42.000 Oh shit. 1.00

03:19:45.000 And all the kids have this too. 1.00

03:19:51.000 It's like being in Canada.

03:19:57.000 I was in Canada.

03:20:01.000 And I always carry a knife.

03:20:04.000 I have a knife.

03:20:06.000 And I put it in my luggage.

03:20:09.000 So I'm in Canada and I put my knife back on my waist.

03:20:12.000 And I'm hanging out with these Canadian guys.

03:20:15.000 And the dude saw the knife on my waist and he touched me on my shoulder.

03:20:20.000 He said, are you okay?

03:20:23.000 I said, yeah, what's up?

03:20:25.000 Why are you carrying a weapon?

03:20:29.000 I said, huh?

03:20:30.000 I said, it's a knife.

03:20:32.000 Like, somebody, you know, if something happened, you know, I'm going to have a...

03:20:35.000 And that man looked at me with the whole thing like...

03:20:40.000 And then he said it.

03:20:42.000 Like, why would somebody be attacking you?

03:20:46.000 I'm like, what?

03:20:47.000 I said, people get attacked all the time.

03:20:48.000 He's like...

03:20:50.000 Where?

03:20:56.000 I said, man, when I live in the U.S., he's like...

03:21:02.000 He looked at me like, you gotta carry a weapon every day?

03:21:08.000 Wow. 1.00

03:21:13.000 And I started to think about the shit. 1.00

03:21:16.000 In his mind, me carrying a weapon is like, wow. 1.00

03:21:24.000 How are you living that you would have to carry?

03:21:29.000 Where do you live that you would have to carry a knife?

03:21:32.000 Like, what is going on that you would have...

03:21:35.000 Like, his mind could not wrap...

03:21:38.000 What part of Canada was this?

03:21:39.000 I was in Montreal!

03:21:40.000 Yeah, that's a pretty sweet neighborhood.

03:21:43.000 Montreal's pretty nice.

03:21:45.000 I don't think...

03:21:45.000 I mean, they must have some crime.

03:21:48.000 He... 0.79

03:21:48.000 The people who get locked up in Montreal are like, you gotta have a mental condition. 0.79

03:21:54.000 Like, you're locked up because you have a mental...

03:21:55.000 They don't have a high...

03:21:57.000 Incarceration rate?

03:21:58.000 Incarcerate.

03:21:59.000 Like, nah.

03:22:00.000 They're so friendly up there.

03:22:01.000 To attack...

03:22:02.000 To be attacked...

03:22:03.000 This man could not...

03:22:04.000 And then later on, he extra... 1.00

03:22:07.000 He blew my fucking brain away. 1.00

03:22:09.000 He was like... 1.00

03:22:10.000 Like, I said something about cops.

03:22:14.000 In his mind, I was like, what?

03:22:17.000 Like, cops do what?

03:22:19.000 Like, what are you saying?

03:22:20.000 Like, cops do what to you?

03:22:21.000 Like...

03:22:23.000 So, what is your relationship with cops?

03:22:27.000 Like, they police officers and that is it.

03:22:32.000 Like, what is happening with cops?

03:22:37.000 And you have to think about it, they cops are different.

03:22:41.000 And they're not living in the same place as you.

03:22:44.000 They're not living in the same space as you.

03:22:46.000 They don't have all these things.

03:22:50.000 To not be seen as a commodity of the country, they don't have that.

03:22:57.000 The number one commodity of a country is its citizens.

03:23:03.000 Like, it's the citizens. 1.00

03:23:04.000 It's like the crude oil and all the rest of the shit. 0.99

03:23:07.000 None of that matters if it's not the citizens. 0.99

03:23:11.000 Yes.

03:23:15.000 Now your mind is gone. 1.00

03:23:18.000 Like, you're fucking out of space now because you live in a country that don't give a fuck about its citizens. 0.99

03:23:24.000 Like, you're not the number one commodity In this country, it's like whoever pulling these strings feel like something else is way more important than your life. 0.99

03:23:33.000 But they live in a place where...

03:23:36.000 Man, I... What?

03:23:39.000 Like, the country cares.

03:23:42.000 Like, the country's not trying to do nothing to me.

03:23:44.000 Like, why would they?

03:23:46.000 I got health care.

03:23:48.000 I don't have to be impoverished here.

03:23:51.000 Like, what is wrong with y'all? 0.98

03:23:53.000 We don't live in a place where people feel like you are valued because there's certain shit that you wouldn't do. 0.99

03:24:04.000 There's no way in the world that a conscious person would say, these pipes in Flint, Michigan, we are running water through these pipes and this is perfectly fine. 0.99

03:24:13.000 But then let's change and run the water through these corroded ass pipes that we know that's corroded and we know have a problem. 1.00

03:24:20.000 Why would you do that? 0.99

03:24:21.000 Like, what would be the logic in doing that and fucking these people up? 0.98

03:24:27.000 And you know it. 0.98

03:24:27.000 It's not no amount of lead that is okay for your body. 0.98

03:24:32.000 The only reason is they don't give a fuck about the people. 0.95

03:24:34.000 That's it. 0.99

03:24:35.000 It's still bad over there, which is crazy because Obama was drinking that water on TV. Remember that thing?

03:24:40.000 Can I get a glass of water?

03:24:43.000 Oh, this is not a stunt.

03:24:44.000 I just want to have a glass of water.

03:24:45.000 He goes and takes the water.

03:24:47.000 Well, it takes the tiniest little Mark Zuckerberg sip.

03:24:51.000 It's a crazy video because it is a stunt because if it wasn't a stunt, you'd take a real drink.

03:24:56.000 You'd get it.

03:24:57.000 All right.

03:25:01.000 That's not what he did.

03:25:02.000 He didn't take like a real drink of that water.

03:25:05.000 That's Obama. 0.99

03:25:06.000 We've already been through Trump, and now we're into Biden, and it's still fucked up. 0.99

03:25:11.000 They gave the people money. 0.99

03:25:14.000 For bottled water?

03:25:16.000 No, they settled the suit.

03:25:18.000 Oh, settled the lawsuit? 0.99

03:25:19.000 So, what does that do when I'm fucked up? 0.99

03:25:25.000 Not much. 0.98

03:25:27.000 Depends on how much money you got and whether or not they can fix you.

03:25:29.000 Even if you had a bunch of money, the man in fucking Silence of the Lamb, he had a lot of money.

03:25:40.000 The one who wanted Hannibal. 0.98

03:25:42.000 The old man who ate the face of Hannibal and made him cut his face off. 0.99

03:25:47.000 That one had a lot of money.

03:25:49.000 He still was very... 0.99

03:25:52.000 A lot of money fucked up. 0.99

03:25:54.000 Doesn't make you happy. 1.00

03:25:55.000 I'm just looking in the bed and doing all that shit like, yo, you fucked up, man. 1.00

03:26:00.000 It don't matter what happens, you fucked up. 1.00

03:26:05.000 I don't get how people do it to other people. 1.00

03:26:12.000 We live in a country.

03:26:13.000 It doesn't affect them.

03:26:14.000 That's how.

03:26:15.000 They get away with it.

03:26:16.000 They profit off of it.

03:26:17.000 It doesn't affect them.

03:26:18.000 Or they allocate profit and money, rather, to things that will benefit them.

03:26:23.000 And the people that are poor and the people that don't have a say, they don't put them a priority.

03:26:29.000 I've always said that the way to make America better is to have less losers. 0.98

03:26:33.000 Best way to have less losers is to take all these economically deprived neighborhoods that are stricken with crime, filled with fucking drug dealers and gang violence and all that, and fix it. 0.99

03:26:45.000 Fix it. 0.99

03:26:46.000 Fix it just like we try to fix other countries, like we try to nation build, we try to overthrow evil dictators and try to rebuild a country. 0.98

03:26:55.000 Fucking do it right here. 0.96

03:26:56.000 Fix it. 0.99

03:26:57.000 Start with Baltimore.

03:26:58.000 Let's go.

03:26:58.000 Start with Southside Chicago.

03:27:00.000 Start with Detroit. 1.00

03:27:01.000 Go to go to all these places that are fucked. 1.00

03:27:04.000 Go to Flint, Michigan and fix it. 1.00

03:27:05.000 Go to all these places that are fucked up and start working. 1.00

03:27:10.000 Make me the president for four years and give me free reign on this shit. 1.00

03:27:17.000 And I guarantee The crime level would go down so low. 0.99

03:27:24.000 What would you do?

03:27:25.000 We're going to start with molesters and rapists. 0.94

03:27:30.000 Let's start with that.

03:27:32.000 First day.

03:27:34.000 You sentenced.

03:27:36.000 I already know you're guilty. 1.00

03:27:38.000 Public display of the bullshit. 1.00

03:27:41.000 I got to do it in public. 1.00

03:27:42.000 I want the president to be standing around on TV. Convicted molester here.

03:27:47.000 Just want to Throw this out there to all the people who may be thinking about molesting and raping people. 0.99

03:27:55.000 You know, who say you got the voices in your head? 0.96

03:27:57.000 She got the voices in your head.

03:27:58.000 Just want you to hear my voice.

03:28:00.000 Hear my voice and then hear his voice.

03:28:03.000 I'm going to get me a real country white boy. 0.61

03:28:06.000 Like the dude who stayed down the street from me.

03:28:07.000 He drive a F-250 diesel.

03:28:11.000 He's a country boy.

03:28:12.000 I'm going to allow him to...

03:28:15.000 Put a nice little rope around your private area.

03:28:18.000 Nice little doohickey. 1.00

03:28:19.000 Nice little situation.

03:28:20.000 And I want the rope to be long.

03:28:23.000 I want it to start at you. 1.00

03:28:25.000 And just gun that shit. 1.00

03:28:27.000 Just gun it. 1.00

03:28:29.000 Just gun it. 1.00

03:28:30.000 Don't stop. 1.00

03:28:31.000 You just gun it. 1.00

03:28:32.000 And you know that this shit is coming. 1.00

03:28:34.000 You know that this man is about to snatch your whole shit off. 1.00

03:28:38.000 Yeah. 1.00

03:28:39.000 Public.

03:28:40.000 We'll patch you up right then.

03:28:41.000 And this is what happens. 1.00

03:28:44.000 This point on, you can't keep your dick. 1.00

03:28:47.000 You gotta go. 1.00

03:28:50.000 Rip that motherfucker from your asshole out, too. 1.00

03:28:53.000 You molest or you rape, you take any type of vagina, a little boy, a little girl that don't belong to you without the conditions and sanctions of that person, this is the type of shit that's gonna happen. 1.00

03:29:06.000 And I'm gonna get wild and wild each motherfucking month, too. 1.00

03:29:10.000 You can't just do that for the president. 0.99

03:29:12.000 They have rules.

03:29:13.000 We're not talking about that.

03:29:14.000 We're talking about you giving me carte blanche. 0.55

03:29:16.000 Okay, you're a dictator.

03:29:17.000 We get full carte blanche.

03:29:18.000 But you're a dictator.

03:29:19.000 Yes!

03:29:20.000 For four years. 1.00

03:29:21.000 Four years, then you can have your shit back. 0.99

03:29:24.000 But what are you going to do about bankers? 1.00

03:29:25.000 What are you going to do about corrupt politicians?

03:29:27.000 What are you going to do about all the people that are... 1.00

03:29:29.000 All sorts of shit. 1.00

03:29:30.000 So bankers! 1.00

03:29:32.000 Corrupt motherfuckers. 1.00

03:29:33.000 This is how I'm going to be talking to. 1.00

03:29:34.000 Don't think I'm going to be doing any type of presidential shit. 0.98

03:29:37.000 I would like to talk to the bankers. 0.99

03:29:38.000 I'm like, bankers! 1.00

03:29:39.000 Motherfuckers! 1.00

03:29:40.000 I'm coming right there. 1.00

03:29:42.000 Goddamn interest rate. 0.99

03:29:44.000 You won't let people... 1.00

03:29:44.000 Okay, you borrowing money and using my money and shit. 1.00

03:29:47.000 Oh, I'm going to go deep diving on their ass. 1.00

03:29:49.000 Need all... 1.00

03:29:50.000 Oh, and I catch you embezzling and all that shit. 1.00

03:29:54.000 Ah, the type of shit. 1.00

03:29:55.000 Dick off too? 1.00

03:29:56.000 For embezzlers? 1.00

03:29:57.000 Oh, I might...

03:29:58.000 It depends.

03:29:59.000 Depends on how...

03:30:03.000 Let me tell you something. 0.99

03:30:07.000 If you put in a man's mind that any crime can get his dick snatched out, oh, best believe. 0.99

03:30:16.000 That would change a lot of things. 0.99

03:30:17.000 Just a mere fact.

03:30:19.000 Hey, man.

03:30:20.000 Hey, man, we're going to rob this bank.

03:30:22.000 Hold on. 0.97

03:30:22.000 Is that a dick-off crime? 0.97

03:30:25.000 Hold on. 0.98

03:30:28.000 I need to be sure.

03:30:30.000 Mm-mm.

03:30:31.000 Mm-mm. 0.98

03:30:32.000 That's a dick-off crime. 0.99

03:30:33.000 A dick-off crime? 0.99

03:30:34.000 Any type of dick-off crimes, I am not going to be involved. 1.00

03:30:38.000 I need some shit that... 0.99

03:30:39.000 You should write this down. 1.00

03:30:40.000 A dick-off crime is a great premise.

03:30:42.000 If you get... 0.98

03:30:43.000 Okay, you get that much of your finger cut off, I risk it. 0.99

03:30:46.000 But dick-off crime? 0.99

03:30:47.000 No, no. 1.00

03:30:48.000 Anything dick-off, I'm not fucking with it. 0.99

03:30:51.000 Think about it. 0.99

03:30:53.000 I'm hearing it.

03:30:54.000 Ali, tell everybody when your special is...

03:30:57.000 Can you say when it's coming out?

03:30:58.000 You can't say when it's coming out.

03:30:59.000 I'm going to say it's happening.

03:31:00.000 It's happening.

03:31:01.000 HBO. I'm having a special come out on HBO. HBO. HBO. And you'll tell us when it's going to be on.

03:31:08.000 Come back again when it's out.

03:31:10.000 I'm going to tell us when it's going to be on.

03:31:11.000 And we'll let everybody know. 1.00

03:31:13.000 You're a funny motherfucker. 0.99

03:31:14.000 I love your stand-up. 1.00

03:31:15.000 Thank you.

03:31:15.000 And I appreciate you coming here.

03:31:17.000 It was a lot of fun. 0.53

03:31:18.000 And dick off crime is legit.

03:31:20.000 That's legit.

03:31:21.000 It's a legit premise.

03:31:22.000 Oh, tell everybody how to get you on social media, website, all that.

03:31:27.000 My social media is Ali Sadiq, A-L-I-S-I-D-D-I-Q. That's all the way across the board.

03:31:33.000 My website, everything. 0.99

03:31:35.000 I don't even know how to work my goddamn Facebook. 0.96

03:31:37.000 I've been... 1.00

03:31:37.000 I've been deleted or whatever the shit is. 1.00

03:31:41.000 I've been violating so much. 0.98

03:31:44.000 I don't even know.

03:31:45.000 Terms of service?

03:31:46.000 These folks keep sending me letters on the Instagram.

03:31:49.000 Your page will be deleted if you don't respond to this.

03:31:53.000 I'm like...

03:31:54.000 I don't even know what to respond to.

03:31:56.000 Like, yo, man, I'm playing music at... 0.97

03:31:59.000 I'm videoing me at a radio station where I fucking work at. 0.93

03:32:03.000 Like, how am I not gonna... 0.98

03:32:06.000 I'm licensed.

03:32:07.000 I work for the station.

03:32:08.000 Which...

03:32:09.000 Alright, I'm about to go, but that's the point. 1.00

03:32:13.000 The thing is, how do you not get violated on fucking Facebook? 0.99

03:32:17.000 D-Nice can DJ for 16 hours on Instagram, and all of a sudden, I put one fucking clip of somebody singing something in the back. 0.99

03:32:24.000 I'm fucking deleting a violation. 0.98

03:32:26.000 I don't know. 0.87

03:32:27.000 But go on anything, AliSadiq.com or With the at behind it, that's how you find me.

03:32:35.000 I'm the bald head black one.

03:32:37.000 Now, he's a little Pakistani Siddiqui running around here. 1.00

03:32:40.000 He does music.

03:32:41.000 He doesn't do comedy.

03:32:42.000 His name's Ali Siddiqui, too?

03:32:44.000 Yeah, it's probably a million of us.

03:32:47.000 But you know it's not me, because he has a full beard.

03:32:52.000 That's how you know it.

03:32:53.000 Oh, okay.

03:32:53.000 He doesn't have the patches.

03:32:55.000 He doesn't have the patches, man.

03:32:56.000 So, HBO is getting ready.

03:33:02.000 Stay tuned, ladies and gentlemen.

03:33:04.000 Stay tuned for the HBO. Yeah, I'm not even saying the name of the special day, but it's going to be a good one.

03:33:10.000 It's going to be some very interesting...

03:33:12.000 I think the whole thing is very interesting.

03:33:15.000 I definitely put a lot of work into getting it together for HBO. Beautiful.

03:33:23.000 Well, I hope it works out.

03:33:25.000 Thanks, man.

03:33:26.000 It was a lot of fun.

03:33:26.000 I don't need it.

03:33:28.000 I was just here.

03:33:29.000 I've seen...

03:33:31.000 That's funny.

03:33:32.000 When they showed me the chart, I don't even know if you ever looked at the chart of listening time that people spend with you versus other things, watching or listening. 1.00

03:33:41.000 That shit is insane. 0.99

03:33:43.000 Yeah, I try not to pay attention. 1.00

03:33:45.000 Yeah, because everybody else is like a three or two or some shit and toddling and your shit is like 14. I don't know. 1.00

03:33:53.000 I don't pay attention, man. 0.98

03:33:55.000 I think if you pay attention, it'll fuck you up, and then you'll be doing it like hoping to get more numbers. 0.97

03:34:00.000 It's like checking likes on Instagram. 0.99

03:34:02.000 It's like, what's the point?

03:34:03.000 Checking likes and followers.

03:34:05.000 Oh, I got more followers.

03:34:06.000 Just live life.

03:34:08.000 You don't get caught up in numbers.

03:34:10.000 I appreciate you, brother.

03:34:11.000 Man, I love coming here.

03:34:13.000 We're already, this is three and a half hours in.

03:34:16.000 No.

03:34:16.000 Believe that?

03:34:18.000 Can't believe it.

03:34:18.000 Time flies in this room.

03:34:23.000 Appreciate you, man.

03:34:24.000 I'll see you again when you come out.

03:34:27.000 We'll let everybody know.

03:34:28.000 It'll be on HBO, and I'm sure it'll be great.

03:34:30.000 Thank you.

03:34:31.000 Bye, everybody.

The Joe Rogan Experience - March 24, 2022

Joe Rogan Experience #1796 - Ali Siddiq

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript