The Joe Rogan Experience - May 01, 2026


Joe Rogan Experience #2493 - Protect Our Parks 16


Episode Stats


Length

3 hours and 17 minutes

Words per minute

212.28

Word count

41,967

Sentence count

6,369

Harmful content

Misogyny

434

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1,635

sentences flagged

Hate speech

583

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Comedian Joe Rogan and his co-hosts discuss JP Morgan and R. Kelly's fake tits, a woman who faked her own tits, and a man who made up a story to get his job back.

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:02.000 Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out.
00:00:04.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.
00:00:06.000 Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.
00:00:09.000 Let's go.
00:00:13.000 We're back, boys.
00:00:15.000 We're back.
00:00:16.000 We are back.
00:00:17.000 We're Comedy Oasis.
00:00:19.000 That's right.
00:00:20.000 What's the story, Morning Glory?
00:00:21.000 It's been almost a year.
00:00:23.000 Wow, it's flying by.
00:00:24.000 What are we, 12 now?
00:00:26.000 Is this 12th episode?
00:00:27.000 No, I think we're way.
00:00:28.000 16?
00:00:28.000 Yeah, we're probably 40.
00:00:30.000 Damn, that's a lot of drinking. 0.97
00:00:31.000 How many times have we played Freebird? 0.99
00:00:33.000 Oh, we're playing it again.
00:00:35.000 We're going to go to the exact same episode we always did.
00:00:38.000 We're going to talk about coming out of the closet.
00:00:41.000 Play Metallica.
00:00:43.000 Yeah, play Metallica.
00:00:44.000 R. Kelly. 0.91
00:00:45.000 So it turns out that that lady, that was a scam, that was fake. 1.00
00:00:48.000 The lady who forced the guy to fuck her, was it JP Morgan? 0.99
00:00:53.000 Yeah, wasn't real. 1.00
00:00:53.000 What? 1.00
00:00:54.000 She was hot. 1.00
00:00:55.000 Yeah, I know. 0.98
00:00:55.000 Was that in the last one we did? 0.98
00:00:57.000 Jamie said it's fake, right?
00:00:58.000 It's fake?
00:00:59.000 Yeah, the news is going around that it's like there was like a lawsuit that is not accurate, apparently.
00:01:04.000 It's like a retaliatory lawsuit. 0.99
00:01:06.000 So he just claimed that she said all those things and she made him fuck her. 1.00
00:01:10.000 Damn, he's a pussy. 1.00
00:01:11.000 Wait, is he an Indian guy? 1.00
00:01:13.000 I believe so.
00:01:13.000 Yeah.
00:01:14.000 Gross. 1.00
00:01:14.000 It does read like an Indian guy now that I'm thinking about it. 1.00
00:01:16.000 Like a scam? 1.00
00:01:17.000 Like the horniest guy ever.
00:01:18.000 Just coming up with the hottest scene.
00:01:23.000 She called him cannons. 1.00
00:01:25.000 Once a lady calls her tits cannons. 1.00
00:01:28.000 Have you ever heard of a girl call her tits cannons? 1.00
00:01:31.000 Right. 1.00
00:01:31.000 18 year old or 16 year old boy thing. 1.00
00:01:33.000 I've never heard cannons.
00:01:34.000 Cannons, gazongas. 0.84
00:01:36.000 I've never heard guys talk about a girl's cannons when she's nowhere near them.
00:01:36.000 What's happening to her?
00:01:40.000 Mm hmm.
00:01:40.000 I've heard cans.
00:01:42.000 Cannons.
00:01:42.000 Sure, yeah.
00:01:43.000 Torpedoes.
00:01:44.000 I've heard cannons.
00:01:45.000 I think.
00:01:45.000 I'm pretty sure I've heard cannons.
00:01:47.000 Nick Cannons.
00:01:48.000 Jugs.
00:01:48.000 Nick Cannons.
00:01:50.000 Jugs.
00:01:50.000 Jugs.
00:01:51.000 Sweater puppets, fun bags, knockers.
00:01:51.000 Jugs are horrible.
00:01:54.000 They're just boobs and tits. 1.00
00:01:55.000 But a lady saying that? 1.00
00:01:57.000 That's no lady. 0.54
00:01:58.000 I'm sure she said. 1.00
00:01:59.000 Because she did? 1.00
00:01:59.000 No, that's no lady. 1.00
00:02:00.000 She said, I'm sure your fish head Asian wife doesn't have cannons like this. 1.00
00:02:06.000 Fish head. 1.00
00:02:07.000 That's what he said.
00:02:08.000 That's what he said.
00:02:09.000 She said.
00:02:10.000 What's that to mean more movies? 1.00
00:02:10.000 Damn. 1.00
00:02:12.000 He's claiming it's that? 1.00
00:02:13.000 Striptease. 1.00
00:02:14.000 When she was the boss and she made the guy fuck her. 1.00
00:02:14.000 No, no. 1.00
00:02:16.000 Disclosure.
00:02:17.000 Disclosure.
00:02:18.000 Oh, I used to yank it to that one. 1.00
00:02:20.000 Oh, God, she was hot. 1.00
00:02:21.000 The article almost made me yank it this morning. 0.85
00:02:23.000 I know, right?
00:02:23.000 I was laying in bed, seeing that Twitter thing.
00:02:26.000 She's hot as hell. 1.00
00:02:26.000 Fish head. 1.00
00:02:27.000 She's hot. 1.00
00:02:28.000 Indian guys should write more stuff. 1.00
00:02:29.000 This guy's a writer, yeah.
00:02:31.000 So if he got fired and he made up that story, what should the repercussions be?
00:02:36.000 Jail.
00:02:37.000 You can't just do that.
00:02:37.000 Yeah.
00:02:38.000 Especially, well, for sure.
00:02:40.000 But if it's well written, though.
00:02:43.000 If it was a guy and a woman claimed that the guy said these terrible things.
00:02:47.000 The guy would be fired.
00:02:49.000 He would be shamed. 0.91
00:02:50.000 But no one's mad at that lady.
00:02:52.000 No, no, no. 1.00
00:02:53.000 No one's mad at that lady for making him fuck her. 1.00
00:02:55.000 No, we love the lady. 1.00
00:02:56.000 Even in the moment before it came out as a hoax when they thought it was true, her boss was like, come on, you can't be doing that.
00:03:03.000 Yeah, that's about as bad as it got.
00:03:04.000 Or he pulled her into the office and go, let me see him. 0.89
00:03:07.000 Let me see these cannons.
00:03:08.000 Let me see these cannons. 1.00
00:03:09.000 Bust out the missiles.
00:03:10.000 We just got to do our research, due diligence.
00:03:12.000 I just got to see the cannons.
00:03:13.000 Which also, we should. 0.66
00:03:16.000 He might be telling the truth.
00:03:20.000 Are we sure it's fake yet?
00:03:22.000 Are we sure it's fake?
00:03:22.000 What a great way to have no one believe you is if you intentionally use words like that.
00:03:28.000 Like, I would never speak that way.
00:03:32.000 There's been a string of middle-age horrors going around lately.
00:03:35.000 Have you noticed that?
00:03:36.000 It's back.
00:03:36.000 Love it.
00:03:36.000 It's back.
00:03:37.000 Like the reporter chick who's been banging the football coach. 1.00
00:03:41.000 Christy Gnome was cheating on that guy with the tits. 1.00
00:03:44.000 Oh, the guy with the tits was fucking. 1.00
00:03:46.000 The tits rock. 1.00
00:03:47.000 Those are canons. 0.99
00:03:48.000 The chick who wrote the RFK article that had a deeply emotional relationship with him. 0.99
00:03:48.000 Crazy. 0.99
00:03:53.000 Yeah.
00:03:53.000 Oh, really?
00:03:54.000 And then that was the second one.
00:03:56.000 It was crazy.
00:03:57.000 Then there was the second one she had like that.
00:03:59.000 She likes to get her to know her subjects.
00:04:01.000 The texts were wild, though.
00:04:03.000 Deeply emotional.
00:04:04.000 Pull them up.
00:04:05.000 Both back and forth.
00:04:06.000 His version was wild.
00:04:08.000 Wait, this is a while ago, right?
00:04:09.000 Yeah, this is a couple years ago.
00:04:10.000 Yeah, there's something like, Let My River Flow into Your.
00:04:13.000 It was odd.
00:04:14.000 It's like a Dave Matthews song.
00:04:15.000 Yeah.
00:04:18.000 Wow. 1.00
00:04:19.000 Damn. 1.00
00:04:19.000 Does he text like he talks? 1.00
00:04:20.000 Is it all jumbly? 0.99
00:04:22.000 But see, for a lady, it's like a free shot. 1.00
00:04:24.000 You never have to worry about getting in trouble. 1.00
00:04:27.000 No one's even going to be in trouble.
00:04:28.000 No one's going to be mad at her as a journalist, even.
00:04:31.000 It's only she's discredited.
00:04:33.000 Yeah.
00:04:34.000 The husband was like, this is kind of lame.
00:04:36.000 The husband didn't love it.
00:04:38.000 Oh, she's married? 1.00
00:04:39.000 Oh, she's a freak. 1.00
00:04:40.000 Yeah. 0.51
00:04:41.000 The reporter with RFK.
00:04:43.000 A legend.
00:04:43.000 Mm.
00:04:44.000 He was a heroin addict, too.
00:04:45.000 He's a fun dude.
00:04:46.000 Fun.
00:04:47.000 Got after it.
00:04:49.000 Lived his life.
00:04:49.000 Oh, yeah.
00:04:50.000 I like him a lot.
00:04:51.000 Didn't use the stutter.
00:04:52.000 That's true. 0.62
00:04:53.000 It's not a stutter, it's a vaccine injury.
00:04:56.000 Yeah.
00:04:56.000 Oh, really?
00:04:57.000 He didn't use the stutter that way?
00:04:58.000 No.
00:04:58.000 From the flu vaccine.
00:04:59.000 Yeah, you see videos of him from the 90s?
00:05:01.000 He had a great voice.
00:05:03.000 Great one.
00:05:03.000 Black hair.
00:05:04.000 Are you reading the text?
00:05:05.000 They're hilarious.
00:05:06.000 It's like Prince Charles.
00:05:06.000 Yeah.
00:05:07.000 Any dude who tries to be romantic, it's like.
00:05:10.000 It's a poem?
00:05:11.000 Yeah, it's a sexual act. 1.00
00:05:12.000 As soon as you're writing a lady a poem, it's over. 1.00
00:05:15.000 How do we know this is true? 1.00
00:05:16.000 I think it was verified.
00:05:17.000 Because from what I remember, it was verified. 0.99
00:05:20.000 Olivia Nuzzy. 0.95
00:05:21.000 Nuzzy. 1.00
00:05:22.000 She sounds like a freak. 0.99
00:05:23.000 Yeah, she's sharing it, so it could be from anybody.
00:05:23.000 Yeah.
00:05:26.000 She sounds like Staten Island trash. 1.00
00:05:27.000 You're open mouth. 1.00
00:05:28.000 You're open mouth.
00:05:29.000 I'm awaiting my harvest.
00:05:30.000 Oh, hey.
00:05:31.000 There we go. 1.00
00:05:32.000 She looks like fun.
00:05:33.000 Not too shabby.
00:05:36.000 Don't spill a drop.
00:05:37.000 You're open.
00:05:38.000 YR?
00:05:38.000 Who writes YR for your.
00:05:41.000 Come on, really?
00:05:42.000 It's trying to look like a tooth.
00:05:43.000 Your open mouth is awaiting my harvest?
00:05:46.000 That doesn't even make sense. 1.00
00:05:47.000 You think he eats ass? 0.99
00:05:48.000 Because that's processed. 1.00
00:05:50.000 This is my favorite one.
00:05:51.000 I mean to squeeze your cheeks to force open your mouth.
00:05:54.000 I'll hold your nose as you look up to me to encourage you to swallow. 0.94
00:05:58.000 Whoa!
00:05:59.000 Don't spill a drop.
00:06:00.000 I am a river.
00:06:01.000 You are my canyon.
00:06:02.000 Wow.
00:06:02.000 Baja, baby.
00:06:05.000 Wow, my love.
00:06:06.000 Okay, I'm not buying this.
00:06:07.000 That sounds like literature.
00:06:09.000 But I can't have a Pop Tart?
00:06:11.000 You can't have Fruit Loops with the good colors.
00:06:16.000 I love these great Fruit Loops, dude.
00:06:20.000 That's the part.
00:06:23.000 You ever seen Canadian Fruit Loops?
00:06:24.000 They're bland and dim and dull.
00:06:27.000 That's what they're going to sell here now.
00:06:29.000 It's over.
00:06:30.000 We used to be a country.
00:06:31.000 It's over.
00:06:32.000 But is this got to be a way to make them prettier?
00:06:34.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:06:34.000 Without giving you ass cancer? 1.00
00:06:36.000 There's got to be some way. 0.99
00:06:36.000 Right. 0.99
00:06:37.000 Give us the ass cancer. 1.00
00:06:38.000 A lot of people are getting the ass cancer. 1.00
00:06:40.000 I saw that. 0.99
00:06:41.000 Yeah.
00:06:41.000 Really?
00:06:42.000 All I do is, like, since it's early. 0.98
00:06:43.000 He's got stage three ass cancer. 0.99
00:06:43.000 30s. 0.99
00:06:45.000 Yeah.
00:06:47.000 But he also took four shots.
00:06:49.000 Four of them.
00:06:50.000 Uh huh.
00:06:51.000 For what shots? 1.00
00:06:52.000 Ass shots? 1.00
00:06:52.000 Vaccines. 1.00
00:06:53.000 And that gives you ass cancer? 1.00
00:06:54.000 He can give you cancer. 0.99
00:06:56.000 Allegedly.
00:06:57.000 Did he boof the shots? 1.00
00:06:59.000 That's the way to do it if you really want to get an ass. 0.99
00:07:01.000 Don't tell me how to take the vaccine. 0.99
00:07:02.000 He stuck the actual needle right into the hole. 1.00
00:07:06.000 In West Hollywood, they're just going to plunge her in the. 1.00
00:07:10.000 Jimmy, boof it. 1.00
00:07:11.000 You got the boofer.
00:07:12.000 Yeah.
00:07:16.000 Well, Trump almost got a shot the other day.
00:07:19.000 Isn't that crazy?
00:07:19.000 What a crazy thing.
00:07:20.000 That's the third assassination attempt on that dude. 1.00
00:07:22.000 The fucking guy ran. 1.00
00:07:24.000 You didn't see this. 1.00
00:07:25.000 I did.
00:07:25.000 Bobby kind of mentioned it in passing.
00:07:27.000 Assassination attempt?
00:07:28.000 Not really.
00:07:29.000 It was at the White House press correspondence dinner.
00:07:31.000 Where Reagan got shot.
00:07:32.000 Was it Michelle Walker?
00:07:33.000 Same hotel.
00:07:34.000 Oh, really?
00:07:35.000 That was a good one.
00:07:35.000 Oh, wow.
00:07:36.000 So that was the trip advisor must be rough on that one.
00:07:38.000 That was a correspondence dinner.
00:07:39.000 Was there a comedian there?
00:07:41.000 No.
00:07:41.000 Oz the Mentalist.
00:07:42.000 Oz the Mentalist, yeah.
00:07:43.000 Oz the mentalist.
00:07:44.000 You think he would have saw it coming? 0.98
00:07:46.000 He probably kept his mouth shut. 0.93
00:07:49.000 He's like, I think we're going to go attack two more Arab countries. 1.00
00:07:52.000 You know what's hilarious?
00:07:53.000 Metzger goes, Did you see the fake assassination attempt?
00:07:57.000 Don't you know?
00:07:58.000 Don't you know about Gilgamesh?
00:07:59.000 And you're like, what?
00:08:01.000 He always brings in his references.
00:08:01.000 Gilgamesh.
00:08:03.000 Drothschilds.
00:08:04.000 Bro, what are you saying?
00:08:05.000 You don't need the references.
00:08:05.000 I don't know.
00:08:06.000 Oh, you don't know?
00:08:08.000 If Metzger can't get it up, he's like, Israel.
00:08:10.000 Yeah.
00:08:10.000 Yeah.
00:08:12.000 Everything's Israel. 0.99
00:08:13.000 I forget about it.
00:08:14.000 It's Israel. 0.99
00:08:19.000 I'm going to start using it. 1.00
00:08:19.000 Pretty good excuse. 1.00
00:08:21.000 Stop everything. 0.98
00:08:22.000 Some of those Kanye clips you showed me are fucking wild. 0.97
00:08:25.000 He's the best. 0.95
00:08:25.000 He's so fun. 0.95
00:08:26.000 What's nice is the shooter was mixed race. 1.00
00:08:28.000 That's nice. 1.00
00:08:29.000 Is that nice? 1.00
00:08:29.000 That's nice because you're always like, don't be white. 1.00
00:08:31.000 Don't be white. 1.00
00:08:32.000 Or don't be black. 1.00
00:08:34.000 That's a whole different combo. 1.00
00:08:34.000 And don't be Arab. 1.00
00:08:35.000 What was the combo? 1.00
00:08:36.000 Don't be an Arab. 1.00
00:08:37.000 Just an American liberal. 1.00
00:08:39.000 Wow.
00:08:40.000 Just a standard American liberal.
00:08:42.000 Had enough of the whatever you want to say he is dictator.
00:08:48.000 Oh, right, right.
00:08:48.000 Fascism.
00:08:50.000 Fascism, pedophile. 0.99
00:08:50.000 The whole thing. 0.99
00:08:53.000 He was like a smart guy, a valedictorian.
00:08:56.000 He was like a scientist guy.
00:08:57.000 I think he was a teacher.
00:08:58.000 Must be extra tough for those guys because they're like so.
00:09:01.000 You haven't gotten into a fight since you were seven. 0.61
00:09:03.000 And then you're going to get a gun and try to kill a high level person.
00:09:07.000 What a step up. 0.94
00:09:08.000 Well, he shot a Secret Service guy.
00:09:10.000 He was in the vest. 1.00
00:09:11.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
00:09:12.000 I don't know who shot who he shot. 1.00
00:09:13.000 Oh, really?
00:09:14.000 Oh, okay.
00:09:14.000 Yeah.
00:09:15.000 You're saying the Secret Service guy shot himself?
00:09:16.000 Not himself.
00:09:18.000 It might have been friendly fire.
00:09:19.000 He was trying to get out.
00:09:20.000 It might have been friendly fire.
00:09:21.000 Is it that lady again?
00:09:23.000 Yes, I think she was.
00:09:24.000 The lady was there. 0.95
00:09:24.000 The one that looks like me? 0.95
00:09:26.000 I'm glad to have her.
00:09:27.000 We were joking around about it in the green room. 0.89
00:09:29.000 Imagine if she was like, I know I fucked up way back in July, but look, guys, I'm better. 0.90
00:09:33.000 Yeah. 0.94
00:09:34.000 I've been working out.
00:09:35.000 Yeah.
00:09:35.000 And then this is their second assignment.
00:09:37.000 Ooh.
00:09:37.000 We didn't talk about this part yet.
00:09:39.000 The tweet?
00:09:41.000 This is the guy.
00:09:42.000 Oh, yeah, the weird time machine tweet.
00:09:44.000 Yeah, this is nuts. 0.70
00:09:45.000 So the Cole Allen guy tried to kill Trump.
00:09:47.000 It's not inside the White House, though, right?
00:09:49.000 It was at a hotel.
00:09:50.000 Okay, an ex account for 2023 wrote a single tweet with that name.
00:09:50.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:09:54.000 With what?
00:09:55.000 So just wrote Cole Allen from 2023.
00:09:58.000 The profile belongs to Henry Martinez, a NASA scientist who's missing.
00:10:02.000 The background image from a website called Time machine.
00:10:05.000 If you de digitize it, the 2024 assassination attempt photos appear, but with a hole in the head instead of the ear.
00:10:13.000 The profile picture is a green toad in a tuxedo with a glass, exactly like Trump in the assassination attempt.
00:10:20.000 Either it's the most elaborate psyop in history, or someone from the future is leaving clues in the past that only make sense once the events happen.
00:10:27.000 Okay.
00:10:28.000 Why does time travelers keep trying to kill me? 0.92
00:10:30.000 I'm just a dang person. 0.97
00:10:31.000 Wait a minute.
00:10:32.000 How is that picture the same?
00:10:33.000 That is not the same.
00:10:34.000 That's just a bunch of colors, and you could decide it's the same.
00:10:36.000 No, you've got to decode it.
00:10:38.000 Oh, it's like a mall rats.
00:10:39.000 You gotta squeeze your eyes together.
00:10:41.000 I'll try.
00:10:42.000 It appears if you squeeze your eyes together.
00:10:44.000 I'll try.
00:10:44.000 Sailboat.
00:10:45.000 What do you, like one of those things where you could say, like words, you know?
00:10:48.000 Yeah, it was always a sailboat or a guitar.
00:10:51.000 Always.
00:10:52.000 Do you think that makes sense, Jamie? 1.00
00:10:52.000 Mall rats. 1.00
00:10:54.000 This picture part of it does not make a lot of sense, I don't think.
00:10:58.000 But it's weird that the guy is strange. 0.74
00:11:00.000 The tweet is nuts.
00:11:01.000 The tweet is strange enough.
00:11:02.000 From two years ago.
00:11:03.000 So he's trying to work up the courage for that.
00:11:06.000 Three years.
00:11:06.000 2023, yeah.
00:11:07.000 Yeah, and then the fact that it's a frog, it's one of those keck guys. 0.99
00:11:10.000 Right. 1.00
00:11:11.000 Those nutty fucking pranksters. 1.00
00:11:13.000 It's funny if he was just trying to search somebody's name. 1.00
00:11:18.000 He just got it right.
00:11:19.000 He was just like, I staled it.
00:11:21.000 Is that the only tweet this guy ever made?
00:11:21.000 Cool guy.
00:11:23.000 I think so.
00:11:24.000 Whoa.
00:11:25.000 Weird.
00:11:26.000 There is a bunch of random Twitter accounts that have tweeted random names just one time, so I don't know what the odds of that happening are.
00:11:33.000 They're pretty slim.
00:11:35.000 These are the eight guys we have trying to work with mentally. 0.99
00:11:40.000 So one of them will be activated and try to kill somebody. 0.66
00:11:42.000 So let's get into it. 0.54
00:11:43.000 Let's get into it.
00:11:44.000 So that guy really was, is that factual, though?
00:11:44.000 Yeah.
00:11:47.000 That the guy really was a NASA scientist, Henry Martinez?
00:11:50.000 Well, so when the people were looking up his history, he had a brief, I think like an internship at JPL, NASA, Jet Labs or something.
00:12:01.000 And I think the other guy did too.
00:12:01.000 Yeah.
00:12:03.000 I don't know that anybody knows more than that.
00:12:05.000 It is weird where you find out a lot of these guys have these weird ties.
00:12:08.000 Like that guy who tried to shoot Trump in Pennsylvania was in a BlackRock commercial.
00:12:13.000 Oh, yeah.
00:12:14.000 What?
00:12:15.000 It's all connected.
00:12:16.000 I did a lot of commercials when I was coming up, and BlackRock never.
00:12:20.000 I didn't get an audition for any of those.
00:12:22.000 Yeah, right?
00:12:22.000 I don't know how you get that commercial.
00:12:23.000 I would love to get that gig.
00:12:24.000 It's got to be non union.
00:12:25.000 Not only that, you definitely get brought into the fold.
00:12:29.000 He was Teacher of the Year, this guy.
00:12:31.000 So, did this guy get a shot off?
00:12:32.000 Was he close enough to get a shot off?
00:12:33.000 Allegedly.
00:12:34.000 Jamie said allegedly he shot a Secret Service guy.
00:12:37.000 How are these guys getting so close? 0.98
00:12:38.000 But it might have been that lady, the fat lady. 0.98
00:12:40.000 Well, this guy shot him. 1.00
00:12:41.000 Maybe. 1.00
00:12:42.000 Trying to get her gun out? 1.00
00:12:42.000 No, shit. 1.00
00:12:43.000 It might have been a P320. 1.00
00:12:45.000 It might have shot himself.
00:12:47.000 She's handsome.
00:12:50.000 It's just crazy that they don't have better security.
00:12:53.000 Yeah, what the hell?
00:12:54.000 How'd the guy get in the hotel with a gun? 0.83
00:12:56.000 Like, how are you not checking every room?
00:12:58.000 How are you not, like, checking everyone's bags? 0.98
00:13:00.000 If you know that the president and Marco Rubio, all these fucking people are going to be there, and Oz the Mentalist, and you don't have someone checking guns. 0.95
00:13:08.000 Why is there better security at the improv on Black Comic Night? 0.99
00:13:14.000 Yeah, throw up a metal detector.
00:13:16.000 It's just crazy that they don't check for guns.
00:13:19.000 That's wild.
00:13:20.000 On a day where it's like the president's going to be there, you didn't check for Guns.
00:13:23.000 I get it if it's like a UFC sniper or somewhere.
00:13:26.000 It's like we can't check everybody like that.
00:13:27.000 It's like 20,000 people.
00:13:28.000 But like this is so small.
00:13:30.000 They're saying he did shoot him, but I don't think this was the first time.
00:13:32.000 Secret Service agent did not shoot himself.
00:13:34.000 I don't think there's any question of what happened here.
00:13:36.000 That video they're playing is the AI video.
00:13:38.000 Yeah, that's.
00:13:39.000 Well, no, this is the real video, which is blurry. 0.99
00:13:42.000 And then AI, they enhanced it because this fucking hotel is shitty old cameras. 0.99
00:13:47.000 Oh. 0.99
00:13:47.000 Which is crazy. 0.99
00:13:48.000 So that's the guy. 0.99
00:13:50.000 By the way, guy's putting in some fucking work there. 0.99
00:13:52.000 There's some speed. 0.99
00:13:53.000 He's got wheels.
00:13:54.000 Yeah, he moves. 1.00
00:13:55.000 Half black. 0.68
00:13:55.000 That guy can move. 0.68
00:13:57.000 Hat whack.
00:13:57.000 Hat whack, whack, whack.
00:14:01.000 Teacher, he can shoot.
00:14:03.000 Teachers, you know, they work at a school.
00:14:05.000 I mean, what did he think was going to happen?
00:14:07.000 He was going to get past all the secret security guys, get through the crowd, find Trump behind the stage, and shoot him?
00:14:12.000 Like, how do you think he was going to get to it? 0.98
00:14:14.000 I think these guys don't think it out, but I bet they go, I'm going to shoot him, then everyone's going to love me. 1.00
00:14:18.000 Yeah, they're going to be Luigi or some shit. 1.00
00:14:21.000 It might be schizophrenia, too. 1.00
00:14:22.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:14:23.000 Yeah, he might be out of his fucking mind. 1.00
00:14:24.000 But he lived, right? 1.00
00:14:25.000 He's in jail.
00:14:26.000 The guy who shot Reagan was like, Taxi driver told me to do it.
00:14:26.000 Yeah, he lived.
00:14:30.000 Well, he rules.
00:14:31.000 So it was like, I think he's out.
00:14:31.000 Yeah.
00:14:33.000 Was that Hinkley?
00:14:34.000 Yeah, Hinkley's out.
00:14:35.000 Yeah, he plays music.
00:14:35.000 He's playing music.
00:14:36.000 I think we've covered this on there. 1.00
00:14:37.000 Yeah, he plays a lot of shit. 1.00
00:14:40.000 It's terrible. 1.00
00:14:40.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00
00:14:44.000 Yeah, he was inspired by Jody Foster.
00:14:47.000 Jody Foster made him shoot.
00:14:49.000 There it is.
00:14:50.000 I will be your man. 1.00
00:14:52.000 Oh, fuck. 1.00
00:14:54.000 That's a threat. 1.00
00:14:54.000 2023, recent release. 1.00
00:14:56.000 Can't wait to see it.
00:14:56.000 Let's hear 2023.
00:14:57.000 I like his job title.
00:14:58.000 Let's hear it.
00:14:59.000 I want to hear I will be your man. 0.94
00:14:59.000 Criminal. 0.94
00:15:01.000 Let's hear what Hinkley's, what his.
00:15:03.000 Jams are like, oh, we have to pay for this.
00:15:05.000 We have to pay for that?
00:15:06.000 No, okay.
00:15:08.000 Oh man, he's got his name on the guitar just in case you don't know who shot Lincoln. 0.98
00:15:19.000 Shoot him for things so long ago.
00:15:32.000 Oh, yeah, he's trying to. 0.84
00:15:33.000 MKUltra?
00:15:34.000 I misunderstood.
00:15:35.000 That's what MKUltra does to him, man.
00:15:37.000 Yeah, he looks like his brain's been washed.
00:15:39.000 Yeah. 0.82
00:15:39.000 Like they just poured bleach in his ears. 0.82
00:15:41.000 Yeah.
00:15:42.000 They're going to release MKUltra files this week, I think.
00:15:45.000 Yeah, I bet.
00:15:46.000 Yeah, we're all right.
00:15:48.000 They were supposed to release UFO files.
00:15:49.000 A lot of black lines coming in that one. 0.99
00:15:51.000 Yeah, whatever happened to the fucking UFO files? 0.99
00:15:53.000 Did he do Kennedy yet? 0.99
00:15:54.000 Is Kennedy out?
00:15:56.000 No.
00:15:56.000 What?
00:15:58.000 JFK?
00:15:58.000 What?
00:15:59.000 Yeah.
00:15:59.000 Turns out there's some stuff in there that we couldn't see.
00:16:02.000 CIA.
00:16:04.000 Yep.
00:16:04.000 Maybe some other ones.
00:16:07.000 Congresswoman Anna Polina Luna lances House hearings on MKUltra next month. 0.89
00:16:12.000 What is that, a gang? 0.95
00:16:14.000 No.
00:16:14.000 I did see it.
00:16:15.000 What's MKUltra?
00:16:16.000 You don't know what that is?
00:16:17.000 That's the mind control experiments that the CIA did in the 1960s and 70s.
00:16:17.000 No.
00:16:20.000 Honest people going to hookers. 0.94
00:16:22.000 Good, honest people going to hookers. 0.51
00:16:23.000 They took advantage of them.
00:16:24.000 That's one part of it.
00:16:25.000 Yeah, that was Operation Midnight Climax.
00:16:28.000 They ran Bronx. 0.97
00:16:29.000 What a good name.
00:16:30.000 Great name.
00:16:30.000 What a good name.
00:16:31.000 Solid name.
00:16:33.000 Yeah.
00:16:34.000 Absolutely proven.
00:16:36.000 That's all from a Freedom of Information Act request and from some documents that they found.
00:16:40.000 What was the guy's name that was like the head of MKUltra?
00:16:43.000 Jolly West.
00:16:44.000 Yeah.
00:16:44.000 And then he went and saw Jack Ruby and Jimmy.
00:16:46.000 Yeah, Jack Ruby went crazy. 0.99
00:16:47.000 Started saying they were lighting Jews on fire in hell. 0.98
00:16:47.000 Yeah. 0.98
00:16:51.000 Like they gave him acid.
00:16:52.000 He's also connected to Manson.
00:16:52.000 Yeah.
00:16:54.000 Yeah.
00:16:54.000 Yeah.
00:16:55.000 Like this guy was running mind control operations all throughout the country.
00:16:59.000 They ran brothels where they gave the Johns acid and the ladies would come out and give the Johns acid and they would watch through a two way mirror and then film them.
00:16:59.000 Wow.
00:17:08.000 Whoa.
00:17:08.000 That's how they react.
00:17:08.000 Yeah.
00:17:09.000 Fucking hell of a night at the brothel. 0.99
00:17:11.000 Right? 1.00
00:17:11.000 I know. 1.00
00:17:12.000 So sick. 1.00
00:17:13.000 This lady's pussy is allergic. 1.00
00:17:15.000 That's talking to me. 1.00
00:17:16.000 Trying to get laid. 1.00
00:17:17.000 Next thing you know, you're fucking seeing Jesus. 1.00
00:17:19.000 Seeing Jesus. 1.00
00:17:21.000 Jesus is in a candle.
00:17:22.000 You lean into it.
00:17:23.000 That's a good night.
00:17:24.000 Right? 1.00
00:17:25.000 You go, oh, shit. 1.00
00:17:25.000 Trying to get a hooker. 1.00
00:17:27.000 You lean into it. 0.99
00:17:29.000 Meanwhile, your wife's at home waiting for the milk and bread to come back.
00:17:31.000 I was supposed to be gone for 30 minutes.
00:17:33.000 I was just trying to get a handjob. 0.85
00:17:36.000 It's the worst lie ever. 1.00
00:17:36.000 Fuck, is he? 1.00
00:17:37.000 The CIA, they drugged me. 1.00
00:17:38.000 What do you want?
00:17:39.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:17:40.000 How many marriages would completely dissolve if prostitution was totally legal? 1.00
00:17:46.000 They'd be a lot easier to do.
00:17:47.000 Are they talking?
00:17:48.000 That's the thing. 1.00
00:17:49.000 Are the hookers talking? 1.00
00:17:50.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:17:50.000 No, but guys are bad at covering up. 1.00
00:17:52.000 It's like Uber ratings, you know?
00:17:53.000 Oh, that would be bad.
00:17:54.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.98
00:17:55.000 Like some Uber drivers, they won't shut the fuck up. 0.96
00:17:57.000 I don't want to see my passenger score. 0.99
00:17:57.000 They want to play music. 0.99
00:17:59.000 Yeah. 0.89
00:18:00.000 I don't want an XL either. 1.00
00:18:02.000 Fuck it. 1.00
00:18:04.000 For prostitutes? 1.00
00:18:05.000 You know what I mean? 1.00
00:18:06.000 If they made prostitution completely legal and then they had scores, do you not think gals would do it? 1.00
00:18:12.000 I think they would. 1.00
00:18:13.000 I think there'd be plenty of gals that would sign up. 1.00
00:18:15.000 They're doing it now. 1.00
00:18:15.000 Plenty of gals. 1.00
00:18:16.000 Prostitution was only for the girls. 1.00
00:18:17.000 They're doing it now, and it's illegal. 1.00
00:18:19.000 How so?
00:18:20.000 So, of course, if you took down the barriers, they would keep doing it.
00:18:20.000 Oh, yeah, they are.
00:18:24.000 Isn't it legal in New York City now? 1.00
00:18:26.000 Prostitution? 1.00
00:18:27.000 Kind of. 1.00
00:18:27.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:18:28.000 I've never been caught.
00:18:29.000 What is the.
00:18:30.000 How many guys are you blowing? 1.00
00:18:32.000 Motherfucker, I was a guest in this. 1.00
00:18:32.000 Hey, hey. 1.00
00:18:34.000 Yeah, it is.
00:18:35.000 It was right there.
00:18:35.000 Yeah, it was a leg.
00:18:36.000 It's just in that beard.
00:18:37.000 It was right there.
00:18:39.000 But they did do something.
00:18:40.000 Were they like decriminalized sex work in New York?
00:18:42.000 Yeah, I think you're right.
00:18:43.000 Yeah.
00:18:44.000 Let's find out, JMO.
00:18:45.000 Mm hmm. 0.99
00:18:46.000 Sex work. 1.00
00:18:47.000 I love when they read in for that. 1.00
00:18:48.000 Sex work. 1.00
00:18:49.000 They always have unhoused sex workers. 1.00
00:18:51.000 It's sex work until one of them is fucking your husband, then it's a hooker. 1.00
00:18:53.000 Exactly. 1.00
00:18:55.000 If you call a girl a horse, she gets mad.
00:18:56.000 Like, which one is it? 1.00
00:18:58.000 Sex worker. 1.00
00:18:59.000 Call a girl sex. 1.00
00:19:00.000 You're a fucking sex worker. 1.00
00:19:01.000 Hey. 1.00
00:19:01.000 That's a legitimate profession. 1.00
00:19:02.000 I love that.
00:19:03.000 It's a pretty funny way to do it.
00:19:05.000 Prostitution is illegal in New York City, but enforcement and politics around sex work are in flux.
00:19:10.000 You're in flux.
00:19:10.000 Ooh.
00:19:11.000 Active debates about decriminalization and new protections for sex workers and trafficking survivors.
00:19:18.000 Anyone else?
00:19:18.000 Well, that's kind of crazy, isn't it?
00:19:19.000 If you have protection for the survivors, so you're saying that they're victims, but then you're also decriminalizing it.
00:19:26.000 So, you're making it okay to do?
00:19:28.000 You're saying that they're victims?
00:19:28.000 Right.
00:19:30.000 No, and like when it's where it is legal, they go, No one's going to abuse you because you don't need a pimp.
00:19:36.000 Right.
00:19:36.000 Because you can go into public care.
00:19:37.000 You probably should.
00:19:37.000 Right.
00:19:38.000 So, that's, well, listen, if you can give someone a massage, you should be able to jerk them off, which doesn't make any sense. 0.99
00:19:44.000 You got that right, Robert Drift. 0.99
00:19:46.000 Poor guy.
00:19:48.000 I met that guy. 1.00
00:19:48.000 Old bastard. 1.00
00:19:49.000 You can't help think about that when you're shaking his hands. 1.00
00:19:51.000 Like, sorry they got you, sir.
00:19:55.000 Sorry they got you.
00:19:55.000 Just a normal thing.
00:19:57.000 It could happen to so many people.
00:19:58.000 100%.
00:19:59.000 They set him up.
00:20:00.000 He wasn't even getting laid.
00:20:01.000 No.
00:20:01.000 It's handy.
00:20:03.000 And he's like, I never got a massage handy.
00:20:05.000 Me neither.
00:20:06.000 I'm down.
00:20:07.000 Every single massage I got, I've been like, I'll take it.
00:20:08.000 You should have responded to those Epstein emails.
00:20:11.000 There's an app for it now called Tug or something.
00:20:14.000 I think so.
00:20:15.000 Don't ruin it for everybody.
00:20:16.000 No, I'm saying Tug.
00:20:17.000 Get on it.
00:20:18.000 Somebody told me how to figure out which one of the handjob places, which one are real.
00:20:21.000 Epstein told me.
00:20:22.000 He goes, Huh?
00:20:28.000 You know the ones with locks in the door?
00:20:30.000 He goes, No business doesn't want you in there.
00:20:33.000 If you have to buzz in, they're like, hold on, I'll stop jerking.
00:20:36.000 There's a cop here.
00:20:37.000 My friend goes on a lunch break.
00:20:39.000 Like, it's pretty popular in New York.
00:20:40.000 Yeah, people are totally.
00:20:41.000 When I moved to Philly, every single person was like, yeah, that's normal. 1.00
00:20:44.000 So, are the girls gross? 1.00
00:20:44.000 Totally normal. 1.00
00:20:46.000 They're Asian.
00:20:47.000 I think there's a range. 1.00
00:20:49.000 And sometimes you get like a Ukrainian skank. 1.00
00:20:52.000 Skank. 1.00
00:20:53.000 Nice. 0.74
00:20:54.000 Say. 1.00
00:20:54.000 Fucking sick. 1.00
00:20:55.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:20:56.000 Could you imagine, though? 1.00
00:20:57.000 That's what a skank you are. 1.00
00:20:58.000 Have some respect for yourself, whore. 1.00
00:20:59.000 How many relationships would just completely dissolve if prostitution was 100% legal? 1.00
00:21:03.000 I think he has. 0.99
00:21:04.000 Well, I'll tell you, in Thailand, it pretty much is, and girls fuck on the first date. 1.00
00:21:09.000 Date? 1.00
00:21:09.000 You're taking them out? 1.00
00:21:10.000 No, not those. 1.00
00:21:11.000 Regular girls, because if I make you wait, you're just going to get a hooker. 1.00
00:21:14.000 Really? 1.00
00:21:15.000 So, like, I better put out.
00:21:16.000 I like that competition. 0.98
00:21:18.000 Well, they seem a little looser sexually anyway in Thailand.
00:21:21.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:21:22.000 You know, with the whole ladyboy thing.
00:21:24.000 They're pretty chill with everything.
00:21:24.000 Right.
00:21:25.000 Yeah, they're pretty relaxed, except for kicking the shit out of people. 0.99
00:21:29.000 They're really good at that. 0.99
00:21:30.000 They're really good at that.
00:21:31.000 It's weird. 0.98
00:21:32.000 Like, a laid-back society is so good at fucking people up and martial arts. 0.97
00:21:35.000 Right. 1.00
00:21:35.000 Do you ever look at ladyboys using their training? 1.00
00:21:38.000 Like before they turned into full ladyboys? 1.00
00:21:40.000 Pull it up. 1.00
00:21:41.000 They trained kickboxing. 1.00
00:21:42.000 What, ladyboys do Muay Thai too? 1.00
00:21:44.000 When they were younger. 1.00
00:21:44.000 Goddamn. 1.00
00:21:45.000 There was one famous one who transitioned to a woman but kept fighting men and started getting fucked up because now she didn't have any hormones anymore or balls. 1.00
00:21:55.000 And so she's just getting the shit kicked out of her as a girl when she was dominating as a guy. 1.00
00:22:00.000 Wow. 1.00
00:22:00.000 It was kind of sad. 1.00
00:22:01.000 Like the one thing that you're really good at other than sucking guys' dicks is fucking people up. 1.00
00:22:07.000 No, you can't do that. 1.00
00:22:09.000 No, I meant on the streets.
00:22:10.000 See, that's a guy.
00:22:11.000 I'm in on the streets.
00:22:12.000 Oh, wow.
00:22:13.000 Is it?
00:22:14.000 Yes, that's a guy. 0.80
00:22:16.000 That's a guy dressed like a girl.
00:22:16.000 I'm a ladyboy.
00:22:17.000 No, I'm in on the streets.
00:22:19.000 Like, if you pick on one of the streets, they all come after you, but then they use it training.
00:22:22.000 Oh, yeah. 0.99
00:22:23.000 So they gang up and kick the box the shit out of you. 1.00
00:22:25.000 And you're like, I just wanted to beat up a hooker. 1.00
00:22:28.000 Why are these half men coming at me? 1.00
00:22:31.000 These dainty, dainty men. 1.00
00:22:33.000 All right, you need a drink.
00:22:34.000 I got one.
00:22:35.000 Oh, okay.
00:22:35.000 Sorry, I'm going to take a cut.
00:22:36.000 Hey, hey.
00:22:37.000 We're back.
00:22:38.000 This is comedy, baby.
00:22:39.000 The parks are being saved.
00:22:39.000 We're back.
00:22:41.000 Dude, all over Latin America, anytime I got recognized, they'd be like, They'd be like, when are we going to get another Protect Our Parks?
00:22:47.000 I'm like, I'm not really in the area right now.
00:22:50.000 As soon as I'm out of Uruguay, I'll let them know.
00:22:53.000 Yeah, I would get questions from people.
00:22:55.000 It was always that.
00:22:57.000 When's the next Protect Our Parks?
00:22:59.000 Anytime I run into someone somewhere, globally too.
00:23:02.000 Australia, I got it.
00:23:03.000 New Zealand, I got it.
00:23:04.000 It's all over.
00:23:05.000 It is fun, though, when somebody like last week, somebody's like, when's the next?
00:23:07.000 I was like, April 30th.
00:23:09.000 They're like, what?
00:23:10.000 Yeah.
00:23:11.000 I'm like, keep it quiet.
00:23:13.000 I did that.
00:23:13.000 Yeah.
00:23:14.000 Yeah.
00:23:14.000 It's very fun.
00:23:16.000 The world needs us.
00:23:17.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
00:23:18.000 Goofy ass fake fucking world out there. 1.00
00:23:18.000 It's good to be back. 1.00
00:23:22.000 Can't believe how many we've done.
00:23:23.000 Cannons.
00:23:24.000 Cannons, cool. 0.99
00:23:25.000 We got that going for you.
00:23:26.000 I want to talk to that guy.
00:23:28.000 I want to find out what really happened. 0.99
00:23:30.000 Interview that Indian fella. 0.96
00:23:31.000 Because apparently they're saying he got fired.
00:23:33.000 Is that what the story is, Jamie?
00:23:34.000 He got fired? 1.00
00:23:35.000 Then he just made a public post on your boss try to fuck you anymore? 1.00
00:23:39.000 Not anymore. 1.00
00:23:41.000 It all changed.
00:23:42.000 I think it was a lawsuit that was filed.
00:23:45.000 I'm not saying that the lawsuit is fake.
00:23:47.000 Real estate. 0.99
00:23:48.000 It's horseshit, is what people are saying. 1.00
00:23:50.000 Does the lady still work there? 0.98
00:23:52.000 I believe what I read was that JP Morgan investigated, didn't find it credible, and she still works.
00:23:57.000 That doesn't seem like a guy.
00:23:59.000 If that was a guy, I don't think.
00:24:02.000 We're going to put you on leave while we look this up.
00:24:04.000 100%.
00:24:05.000 And then, like, Trevor Bauer, like, oh, he found out it's fake.
00:24:08.000 Like, can I get my job back?
00:24:09.000 They're like, nah.
00:24:10.000 Trevor Bauer?
00:24:11.000 He works for the Long Island Ducks.
00:24:12.000 Trevor Bauer is a Cy Young, the highest award for a pitcher.
00:24:16.000 Phenom.
00:24:17.000 He got some chick, pretty much told all their friends, like, I'm going to go get money out of that guy.
00:24:21.000 Yep.
00:24:22.000 We got the text message.
00:24:23.000 Yeah, he kind of proved it all.
00:24:25.000 But Dodgers, was it Dodgers?
00:24:26.000 I don't remember.
00:24:27.000 It was like, hey, you can't work there anymore.
00:24:29.000 He was never the Brewers.
00:24:31.000 Brewers?
00:24:31.000 No, I don't remember.
00:24:32.000 Moved to Japan.
00:24:33.000 Moved to Japan, tried to pitch there.
00:24:34.000 And he's like, I'm good.
00:24:35.000 He told MLB, he goes, I'll pitch for free.
00:24:38.000 And I'm a Cy Young winner.
00:24:39.000 And everyone's like, eh.
00:24:41.000 That's crazy.
00:24:41.000 Lost $300 million.
00:24:42.000 Yeah.
00:24:43.000 Now he's playing for the minors in Long Island.
00:24:46.000 Oh, my God.
00:24:46.000 He loves playing.
00:24:47.000 Yeah.
00:24:49.000 And what happened to her?
00:24:50.000 I think she got like a slap on the wrist.
00:24:52.000 Yeah, I think she was like, he was like, don't come after me anymore.
00:24:54.000 Don't come after anybody else anymore.
00:24:55.000 That's it? 0.67
00:24:56.000 She did photos with black eyes. 1.00
00:24:57.000 She got makeup done. 0.74
00:24:58.000 He beat me up. 0.99
00:24:59.000 He beat the shit out of me. 0.99
00:25:00.000 It was all made up. 0.99
00:25:02.000 It's a crazy story.
00:25:03.000 Monsters out there.
00:25:04.000 Crazy. 1.00
00:25:04.000 Crazy. 1.00
00:25:05.000 But the crazier thing is, like, if it is a Dodgers, say it is, to not go, hey, dude, we were fooled.
00:25:11.000 Yeah.
00:25:11.000 I'm sorry.
00:25:12.000 Here's your contract back.
00:25:13.000 He should sue them for that.
00:25:14.000 How old is he now, though?
00:25:15.000 He's lost years of his career.
00:25:16.000 Yeah.
00:25:17.000 It's already over, right?
00:25:18.000 Yeah.
00:25:19.000 He's still great.
00:25:20.000 He just pitched a no hitter.
00:25:21.000 Really?
00:25:22.000 He's playing against nine-year-olds.
00:25:22.000 Yeah.
00:25:27.000 Oh, that's exciting.
00:25:28.000 How old is he, Jamie?
00:25:29.000 35.
00:25:32.000 That's crazy because, like, when it all happened with him.
00:25:35.000 Yeah, he's 35.
00:25:36.000 He's 35 now.
00:25:37.000 It was about eight or nine years ago, wasn't it?
00:25:40.000 2020?
00:25:41.000 2021 is when he was suspended.
00:25:43.000 Five years ago, he was suspended.
00:25:44.000 So he lost his prime.
00:25:45.000 30 to 35.
00:25:46.000 That's prime.
00:25:47.000 Ruined his life.
00:25:47.000 He had just won the Cy Young.
00:25:49.000 He's just won it.
00:25:51.000 Wow.
00:25:51.000 Brutal.
00:25:54.000 Oh, my God.
00:25:54.000 Oh, my God.
00:25:55.000 All she gets is a slap on the wrist?
00:25:57.000 He's pretty much like, go away. 1.00
00:25:57.000 Crazy. 1.00
00:25:59.000 She violated some part of the settlement and had to pay him 300 grand. 0.96
00:26:04.000 Oh, great. 0.99
00:26:05.000 That'll cover his fucking monthly whatever. 0.99
00:26:07.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:26:08.000 His Zin.
00:26:10.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00
00:26:11.000 That's a couple zins out of it. 1.00
00:26:13.000 She only got fined 300 grand.
00:26:15.000 She cost him 300 million.
00:26:16.000 Exactly.
00:26:17.000 Oh my God, that's crazy.
00:26:19.000 Whatever you accuse someone of, if it's fake, you should get that punishment.
00:26:23.000 Or you're trying to get that punishment.
00:26:24.000 No, I completely agree.
00:26:24.000 Yeah, absolutely.
00:26:26.000 That's never the case, though.
00:26:28.000 Well, she can't play for the Dodgers.
00:26:31.000 Who was he with?
00:26:32.000 That's the thing that bothered me about this.
00:26:34.000 Yeah, when that happened.
00:26:34.000 It was the Dodgers?
00:26:35.000 Fake sports fan.
00:26:36.000 But on a bunch of teams, though.
00:26:37.000 Why did I think it was the Brewers?
00:26:38.000 Because it was last name?
00:26:39.000 Bauer Brewer.
00:26:39.000 Bauer.
00:26:40.000 Yeah. 0.92
00:26:41.000 So, if he went to jail for it, that's what she should go to jail for.
00:26:44.000 Because if she's accusing him of sexual assault. 0.99
00:26:47.000 He was, I think she was just suing him, suing him.
00:26:49.000 And then public, whatever.
00:26:53.000 Destruction of reputation.
00:26:54.000 Yeah.
00:26:55.000 Oh, my God.
00:26:56.000 That's so awful.
00:26:57.000 You should have him on.
00:26:57.000 Poor guy.
00:26:58.000 I would.
00:26:59.000 That'd be a great convo.
00:27:00.000 Oh, happy son.
00:27:00.000 Yeah, that'd be a convo.
00:27:01.000 He's also, I think, pretty funny.
00:27:03.000 No way.
00:27:04.000 Bro, you've got to get a sense of humor after that.
00:27:06.000 If you survive that, you survive that, I bet you have a wicked sense of humor. 0.98
00:27:09.000 Planted Japan where they all have tiny strike zones. 0.98
00:27:11.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:27:12.000 That's one thing I think we could all attest to.
00:27:14.000 It's not the only thing.
00:27:15.000 You survive a cancellation, you come out of the other end just a little bit more funny.
00:27:19.000 Yeah, a little funny.
00:27:20.000 Nothing really bad.
00:27:21.000 A little more pop.
00:27:22.000 A little more pop to the punchlines.
00:27:25.000 He's throwing 102 in Japan.
00:27:26.000 Look at Kanye.
00:27:28.000 How many kilometers an hour is that?
00:27:31.000 Kanye recovers from getting canceled to have the biggest concerts in human history.
00:27:35.000 Yeah, so far.
00:27:36.000 Standing on top of the world with clouds.
00:27:38.000 Bill Cosby must be amazing right now.
00:27:42.000 He's blind, though.
00:27:42.000 He can't read his notes.
00:27:44.000 Oh, it's tough to read off a teleprompter. 0.54
00:27:46.000 You're a blind comic.
00:27:47.000 I don't think he ever read anyway.
00:27:48.000 I think he was all in his memory anyway.
00:27:50.000 I don't even know if he writes or if he just sits down and comes up with his stories because he's like a story guy.
00:27:57.000 Yeah.
00:27:57.000 Yeah.
00:27:58.000 He is pretty good.
00:27:59.000 I heard an album.
00:28:00.000 It was like, it really paints a picture, but then you're like, then you listen to like Kennison and you're like, oh, this guy, Cosby, is very slow.
00:28:05.000 Yeah.
00:28:06.000 But it's a different style.
00:28:07.000 It's like listening to, you know, John Denver versus Metallica.
00:28:11.000 You can't, you know.
00:28:12.000 Solid comparison.
00:28:13.000 Yeah.
00:28:14.000 You got to be in the mood. 0.99
00:28:15.000 Rocky Mountain High or Doom, Do That is the greatest fucking thing I've ever seen in my life. 0.99
00:28:15.000 Both good. 0.99
00:28:15.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:28:31.000 We're going to watch it again.
00:28:32.000 We'll do it. 1.00
00:28:33.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
00:28:34.000 Norman, don't be scared of the. 1.00
00:28:35.000 It's going to be a loop of that shit. 1.00
00:28:37.000 Fine. 1.00
00:28:38.000 That's fine.
00:28:39.000 People have to listen to the song in a year.
00:28:41.000 It's a yearly reminder.
00:28:42.000 We're going to close out with a live free bird from 77. 1.00
00:28:45.000 Fuck you. 1.00
00:28:46.000 Did you give me a beer? 1.00
00:28:50.000 Here it is.
00:28:51.000 Look at this.
00:28:52.000 Oh, God.
00:28:52.000 We're doing it again.
00:28:53.000 We're back.
00:28:54.000 Cameo, why'd you do that?
00:28:54.000 Come on.
00:28:55.000 Deja Jew. 0.98
00:28:57.000 Imagine how pumped these people are. 0.53
00:28:59.000 Communism is dead for a little bit.
00:29:01.000 Metallica's on stage.
00:29:01.000 And then.
00:29:03.000 It's so sad that rock is dead.
00:29:05.000 We were talking about that. 0.99
00:29:06.000 Yeah, it's all queefy now.
00:29:07.000 When was the last time?
00:29:08.000 Where's the new rock bands?
00:29:10.000 The new Zeppelin.
00:29:11.000 Watch out for a while.
00:29:13.000 There's some of these smaller bands.
00:29:15.000 Right, but where's the big ones?
00:29:16.000 It used to be Van Halen.
00:29:17.000 It used to be the biggest part of music.
00:29:20.000 Rolling Stones.
00:29:21.000 Shred.
00:29:22.000 ACDC.
00:29:23.000 I know.
00:29:24.000 I mean, Aerosmith.
00:29:25.000 It used to be the biggest part of music, was rock and roll. 1.00
00:29:29.000 What the fuck? 1.00
00:29:30.000 That's kind of crazy. 1.00
00:29:32.000 Nice.
00:29:32.000 Bodega cat, ladies and gentlemen.
00:29:34.000 And a variable at fine bodegas all across Manhattan.
00:29:36.000 You got that right, Fatty.
00:29:37.000 Get a bottle.
00:29:38.000 But yeah, now it's country.
00:29:40.000 Country's huge.
00:29:40.000 Country's huge, man.
00:29:41.000 Which is fine, but what happened to rock?
00:29:43.000 I know we know about rock.
00:29:44.000 I love country.
00:29:45.000 I have no problem with country getting huge.
00:29:46.000 Yeah, what happened to rock?
00:29:47.000 What happened to rock?
00:29:48.000 Who are the biggest.
00:29:50.000 They said garage bands are coming back with kids, which means nature is healing.
00:29:56.000 Yeah.
00:29:57.000 That's a good sign.
00:29:58.000 Yeah, kids are tired of playing video games and want something real.
00:30:00.000 But the thing that doesn't make sense about rock music is everybody still loves it.
00:30:06.000 Right.
00:30:07.000 Everybody still plays covers.
00:30:08.000 I'm not even making it.
00:30:09.000 Oasis is doing giant arenas all over the place.
00:30:12.000 But they're playing old songs.
00:30:13.000 I took acid at that Oasis concert.
00:30:14.000 Really?
00:30:15.000 Which one?
00:30:16.000 Where'd you go?
00:30:16.000 MKUltra?
00:30:17.000 Chicago.
00:30:17.000 Chicago.
00:30:18.000 I got MKUltra.
00:30:19.000 I was just watching the concert.
00:30:19.000 Yeah.
00:30:21.000 I was like, oh, shit. 1.00
00:30:22.000 How fun is music on acid? 1.00
00:30:24.000 It's the best.
00:30:25.000 See, I've never done acid since college.
00:30:27.000 I go shroom now. 0.88
00:30:28.000 Acid. 0.80
00:30:29.000 That's responsible. 0.70
00:30:31.000 It'll get away from me.
00:30:31.000 Grateful Dead's entire career.
00:30:33.000 I see how it worked.
00:30:34.000 I mean, apparently, if you listen to The Dead on acid, it's a totally different thing.
00:30:38.000 They were playing acid.
00:30:39.000 Too acid.
00:30:40.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:30:40.000 Like, they weren't playing for you to not like it on acid.
00:30:42.000 You're supposed to, like, if you guys are acid, let me entertain you for a second.
00:30:45.000 Yeah, you're supposed to be on acid.
00:30:47.000 It's like those ayahuasca eco rows.
00:30:50.000 You listen to them normally, they're not that interesting. 0.82
00:30:51.000 But if you come up in on DMT, they're pretty fucking incredible.
00:30:54.000 I got some of Roger Water.
00:30:55.000 We were doing a podcast here, me, Scorin, and Bert, and you, and then you're like, what are you doing tomorrow?
00:30:59.000 Are you going to stay?
00:31:00.000 I was like, oh, I got to, this is so funny.
00:31:00.000 Roger Water's just playing.
00:31:02.000 I was like, I got to leave.
00:31:03.000 He goes, why?
00:31:04.000 I'm like, oh, yeah, I don't know.
00:31:06.000 But I'm like, but my hotel, I have to check out tomorrow.
00:31:09.000 He goes, extended.
00:31:11.000 You were my personal guest, Roger Waters.
00:31:13.000 Change R.A.'s flight to the next day.
00:31:14.000 And I was like, yeah, all right.
00:31:15.000 But then it was like, I got to find acid on one day's notice.
00:31:19.000 Yeah.
00:31:19.000 You got to shout out Roger Waters because he was way ahead of everybody calling out the genocide.
00:31:24.000 Way ahead of his time.
00:31:25.000 He was doing it a long time ago. 1.00
00:31:26.000 A long time ago, calling out how they're treating the Palestinians. 0.98
00:31:29.000 He even really got kicked up. 0.99
00:31:30.000 He's a little frosty with the heaves, though, is he not?
00:31:32.000 He got frosty with me.
00:31:33.000 Oh, there you go.
00:31:34.000 He got frosty with you.
00:31:35.000 He was living at me. 1.00
00:31:37.000 You were fucking with him. 1.00
00:31:39.000 He was on acid and he was fucking with them after the show. 1.00
00:31:42.000 We were all hanging out and Roger was drinking. 0.97
00:31:44.000 This was sober October.
00:31:47.000 We had a one day permission to do one thing.
00:31:47.000 It was sober October.
00:31:49.000 Exemption.
00:31:51.000 Come on, guys.
00:31:52.000 I'll give you guys each a drink if you let me do one piece of paper.
00:31:55.000 I chose the devil's cabbage.
00:31:56.000 I was scared of the acid because who knows where it came from.
00:31:59.000 Sure.
00:31:59.000 Like, Ari, I got a business to run.
00:32:00.000 I can't go crazy right now.
00:32:02.000 I did some.
00:32:03.000 Tony's ex did some. 0.98
00:32:05.000 And I remember we were back at the hotel and I was looking at this picture and I was like, damn, this is a crazy video. 0.93
00:32:09.000 Ari is full on weeping in the middle of the concert. 0.97
00:32:13.000 Full on falling.
00:32:14.000 This is amazing.
00:32:16.000 He came up and sat next to me and I'm like, what's wrong with Ari?
00:32:22.000 He's freaking out.
00:32:23.000 I'm like, dude, are you okay?
00:32:25.000 I was not okay.
00:32:26.000 He didn't even know what the dose was.
00:32:28.000 He just took whatever the guy gave him.
00:32:29.000 It was fresh.
00:32:30.000 I had to let it dry in the AC of the concert.
00:32:32.000 Car over there.
00:32:32.000 I'd hold it on the bed and let it dry some.
00:32:35.000 It was like blotted paper.
00:32:37.000 Whoa.
00:32:37.000 Blotted, yeah.
00:32:39.000 It was so good.
00:32:40.000 See, that's the thing with that?
00:32:41.000 You don't know when it's going to end.
00:32:42.000 You don't know where it came from.
00:32:43.000 Also, you don't really know when it's going to start. 0.99
00:32:45.000 I took a little and I was like, shit's not working. 0.98
00:32:47.000 Give me another one. 0.99
00:32:49.000 Oh, boy, that old move.
00:32:51.000 I stared at a painting in my hotel room for 12 hours. 0.98
00:32:53.000 You know how many guys have ruined their fucking entire life by doing that with edibles? 0.98
00:32:58.000 Gotten that second one. 0.99
00:32:58.000 Yes. 0.99
00:32:59.000 I don't feel shit. 0.99
00:33:01.000 They took that second one and then they can't escape. 0.99
00:33:03.000 This is how the story starts.
00:33:04.000 Yeah, every time you're like, maybe I'll take the other half.
00:33:06.000 And they roll right into schizophrenia land.
00:33:09.000 Hey.
00:33:10.000 Maybe your mom's not really your mom.
00:33:12.000 Early years of comedy, I pitched a show and Lionsgate picked it up.
00:33:17.000 And they flew me out to LA to pitch the show to Netflix and Amazon.
00:33:20.000 It was the biggest deal of my life.
00:33:22.000 And the night before, I did Tripoli's show.
00:33:25.000 And he gives you a bag of weed stuff, you know?
00:33:27.000 And I was like, I can't do weed. 0.91
00:33:29.000 I'm a wuss. 0.88
00:33:29.000 I'm a lightweight. 0.88
00:33:30.000 And he goes, Well, take some CBD.
00:33:31.000 And I go, Oh, okay, I'll do that.
00:33:33.000 I wanted to get some sleep.
00:33:34.000 So I chugged a bottle of CBD, and it was THC.
00:33:38.000 I woke up.
00:33:38.000 The bed was vertical.
00:33:39.000 I was hanging on to the post.
00:33:41.000 I don't know you're going to take it.
00:33:42.000 It felt like the carpet was sinking with me.
00:33:44.000 I was holding onto a chair.
00:33:46.000 I skipped it.
00:33:47.000 I couldn't go.
00:33:48.000 I was high for like 14 hours.
00:33:48.000 It was too high.
00:33:50.000 Oh, yeah.
00:33:50.000 I was about to catch you.
00:33:51.000 You should have went.
00:33:52.000 My manager's like shaking me, like, you got to go.
00:33:54.000 And I'm like, I can't do it.
00:33:55.000 I can't face it.
00:33:56.000 It was like Lee Syatt.
00:33:57.000 That was so funny.
00:33:58.000 You should have went.
00:33:59.000 Oh, God. 1.00
00:34:00.000 I would have shoved my hand up your ass and operated you like a puppet. 1.00
00:34:00.000 I would have sold a little bit. 1.00
00:34:04.000 I would have made you go.
00:34:05.000 I would have sold like Duncan Trussell's show if I showed up.
00:34:10.000 But I couldn't face him, and he would like, I think they'd drop me after the week. 0.99
00:34:13.000 Duncan is the absolute best at saying, like, fucking around. 0.97
00:34:16.000 Like, he was going, Hold on, I just got a text from my wife's boyfriend. 0.99
00:34:21.000 How's he doing?
00:34:22.000 Not good.
00:34:23.000 Turns out he's got syphilis.
00:34:24.000 Poor guy.
00:34:25.000 I hope he gets better.
00:34:27.000 Just casual.
00:34:28.000 There's nothing worse than getting that high, though.
00:34:30.000 Like, McCusker used to make weed gummies when we lived together.
00:34:33.000 He would make homemade gummies.
00:34:34.000 Wow.
00:34:35.000 He would, like, try to make gummies.
00:34:36.000 It was crazy.
00:34:37.000 And then I'd just be sitting there playing Xbox, and he'd be like, Here, take some of these.
00:34:41.000 And I'd just try them out.
00:34:43.000 But one time he left.
00:34:44.000 I did a show at a casino outside of Philly.
00:34:46.000 He gave me a bag of gummy bears. 0.99
00:34:48.000 Obviously, I got fucking hammered. 0.97
00:34:50.000 And I was just in my hotel room, just ate them. 0.99
00:34:53.000 I just ate as many as I could.
00:34:54.000 Did you know that they were pot gummy bears?
00:34:56.000 I just think they were pot gummy bears.
00:34:57.000 But you can't stop it.
00:34:57.000 I did.
00:34:58.000 I was hammered.
00:34:58.000 I was like, no, no.
00:34:59.000 Gummy bears.
00:35:00.000 They're so good. 1.00
00:35:01.000 I just killed that fucking hotel lobby. 1.00
00:35:03.000 That was great. 1.00
00:35:05.000 And then I woke up and it was in a casino with no, my room had no windows. 0.99
00:35:08.000 It was in the fucking basement. 0.98
00:35:10.000 And I didn't know my buddy was also, I was like, you sleep in my room. 0.99
00:35:13.000 He was on the floor.
00:35:14.000 He was this kid that opened for me in the morning. 1.00
00:35:17.000 I woke up and I was still high as fuck. 0.99
00:35:18.000 And I was just like, ah, ah. 0.99
00:35:22.000 In the darkness, I hear somebody like, Shane?
00:35:24.000 I was like, ah.
00:35:25.000 That's like waking up high is wild. 0.99
00:35:28.000 Wake up high sucks. 0.99
00:35:29.000 I was like, who's it? 0.99
00:35:30.000 Who's in here?
00:35:32.000 You remember the days where Joey Diaz would have people in the church of what's happening now and he would swap out the 25 milligram animals for 250s?
00:35:40.000 He did it to me.
00:35:40.000 There's like a package like this, whatever.
00:35:43.000 And I see it, it says 25.
00:35:44.000 I'm like, you know what?
00:35:45.000 I'm a 10 guy, but. 1.00
00:35:47.000 When I'm with Duyas, I'll go 25. 0.92
00:35:49.000 And then I ate it, but then something nags in your head.
00:35:51.000 You're like, why was it 20?
00:35:52.000 It was like, why was it open?
00:35:54.000 Why was it tilted a little?
00:35:55.000 Right.
00:35:55.000 And then I was just like, kept talking, and I was like, picked it off, and you just see 250.
00:35:59.000 Oh.
00:36:00.000 You're like, Joey. 0.94
00:36:01.000 You killed me. 0.79
00:36:01.000 Oh. 0.79
00:36:02.000 Oh, he would give Lee Sayat 500s.
00:36:04.000 He would give him 2,500.
00:36:06.000 We just got Lee again.
00:36:07.000 We did a 420 episode, and Lee was like, oh, yeah, back to that.
00:36:12.000 Indy 500.
00:36:12.000 500 milligrams?
00:36:13.000 Yeah.
00:36:14.000 It blows.
00:36:14.000 It's crazy, dude.
00:36:15.000 You know what's crazy?
00:36:16.000 JMO, Jamie can do 1,000 and it barely hits him.
00:36:19.000 Give him a body fat. 1.00
00:36:19.000 Shut up. 1.00
00:36:19.000 Is that true? 1.00
00:36:20.000 No, no, no.
00:36:21.000 He's got some weird enzyme.
00:36:22.000 You got to go with a slice of pizza or something.
00:36:24.000 Doesn't work on everything, man.
00:36:25.000 Okay, fair.
00:36:25.000 Wow.
00:36:26.000 Damn. 1.00
00:36:27.000 Yeah, it just doesn't work with his spectrum. 0.99
00:36:29.000 Yeah, anything more than 10 milligrams.
00:36:30.000 Some people, every once in a while.
00:36:31.000 His super brain just shuts it off.
00:36:32.000 Like, nope, not interested.
00:36:34.000 Wow.
00:36:34.000 Bye.
00:36:35.000 Mine does not, dude.
00:36:36.000 If I take 10 milligrams, I'm like, oh.
00:36:38.000 Same.
00:36:39.000 Well, the UFCs are always great.
00:36:40.000 We take like 50 in just like six hours.
00:36:42.000 Well, you guys took acid at the UFC guys.
00:36:45.000 We were up in the bat seats, so we took acid.
00:36:47.000 Me, Red Band, and Diaz. 0.97
00:36:49.000 And then Rogan, it was kind of early on.
00:36:51.000 And Rogan's like, where are you guys?
00:36:52.000 We're like, we're up there, and he's like, seeing us.
00:36:53.000 Like, are you guys flying? 0.98
00:36:54.000 We're like, we're fucked Dude, half of my day was thinking about them being on acid watching these crazy fights. 0.99
00:37:02.000 I can imagine so it made me jealous. 0.98
00:37:04.000 It felt like college fun, yeah.
00:37:06.000 Forrest Griffin came in and everyone's cheering.
00:37:08.000 I'm like, Why are you cheering?
00:37:09.000 You might get hurt.
00:37:10.000 This is like 2005, then, yeah.
00:37:13.000 Imagine seeing Brock Lesnar on acid, he's terrified, bro.
00:37:17.000 He's a warrior, that guy, bro, like a Viking.
00:37:20.000 You ever see his daughter?
00:37:21.000 His daughter's a champion shot putter, yeah.
00:37:24.000 What, no, what do you see? 1.00
00:37:26.000 She's a no athlete. 1.00
00:37:29.000 Oh, shot put. 1.00
00:37:30.000 She throws that iron gear.
00:37:32.000 What do you think?
00:37:33.000 He thought I was shooting a gun. 1.00
00:37:34.000 Bro, she's like a fucking no. 1.00
00:37:37.000 You got to see her. 1.00
00:37:38.000 It's definitely related. 0.94
00:37:39.000 Watch her. 1.00
00:37:39.000 Yeah, 100%. 1.00
00:37:40.000 It was Hulk Hogan.
00:37:41.000 But watch the video. 0.83
00:37:43.000 See if you can find a video of her throwing it. 1.00
00:37:45.000 Mark's talking shit, Mark. 1.00
00:37:47.000 Mark's talking shit. 1.00
00:37:48.000 She's a beautiful, sturdy lady. 1.00
00:37:49.000 Mark's talking shit. 1.00
00:37:50.000 I agree with Shane. 1.00
00:37:51.000 I have nothing but respect for you and your family. 1.00
00:37:53.000 Oh, is she Albinian? 1.00
00:37:55.000 She's a Viking woman. 1.00
00:37:56.000 I know you do.
00:37:56.000 Look at this.
00:37:57.000 Whoa. 0.97
00:37:58.000 Pale honky.
00:37:59.000 Bro, that's crazy. 0.99
00:38:00.000 Imagine blowing your shoulder out trying to fucking throw that thing. 0.99
00:38:02.000 Woo, wee. 1.00
00:38:03.000 Imagine her grabbing your balls. 1.00
00:38:05.000 Hachi Machi. 1.00
00:38:07.000 Don't go over the line.
00:38:08.000 Don't go over the line.
00:38:09.000 Make a warrior with those jeans. 0.60
00:38:11.000 Yes.
00:38:11.000 You're proud Buffalo.
00:38:12.000 What's the mom look like, huh? 1.00
00:38:14.000 She's hot. 1.00
00:38:15.000 She's just a tank. 1.00
00:38:17.000 She's a pro wrestler. 1.00
00:38:18.000 She's a fucking transformer. 1.00
00:38:20.000 She's a bulldozer. 1.00
00:38:24.000 She's Optimus Prime. 1.00
00:38:25.000 Get the mom up. 1.00
00:38:26.000 The mom is hot. 1.00
00:38:27.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
00:38:28.000 She got all Brock's jeans. 1.00
00:38:30.000 That's the mom. 1.00
00:38:30.000 Whoa! 1.00
00:38:32.000 Sable at Lahore.
00:38:34.000 That's right.
00:38:35.000 That's the wife. 1.00
00:38:35.000 Whoa! 1.00
00:38:36.000 So hot.
00:38:36.000 Sable was.
00:38:37.000 That's what I'm talking about.
00:38:38.000 The puppies.
00:38:39.000 But, bro, look at his jeans.
00:38:41.000 Those jeans dominate.
00:38:42.000 Nice cannons. 0.98
00:38:43.000 Those are Viking jeans.
00:38:44.000 That's what Iceland looks the way it is.
00:38:46.000 Viking jeans.
00:38:47.000 Oh, is that them now?
00:38:48.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:38:49.000 She's 10 years older than them. 1.00
00:38:49.000 Oh, hell yeah. 1.00
00:38:50.000 She looks able. 0.97
00:38:51.000 She looks great. 0.99
00:38:52.000 She's got a bit of a bulge, though, on the right. 1.00
00:38:54.000 That's her hands. 1.00
00:38:55.000 Her hands are in her body. 1.00
00:38:55.000 Oh, God. 1.00
00:38:56.000 She's still really risking it with.
00:38:58.000 I love you, Brock. 1.00
00:38:59.000 Brock Lesnar's going to fucking kill you. 1.00
00:39:00.000 He's going to Viking you. 1.00
00:39:01.000 He doesn't care.
00:39:02.000 Brock and roll.
00:39:03.000 He's writing your name down with crayons right now.
00:39:08.000 He's got that sword tattoo right here.
00:39:10.000 It's just A real warrior.
00:39:11.000 Yeah, he said he got drunk and didn't remember it and woke up. 0.99
00:39:14.000 I was like, what the fuck did I do? 0.99
00:39:16.000 You just regret it. 0.99
00:39:16.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:39:18.000 That's a lame tattoo.
00:39:19.000 You just regret it.
00:39:20.000 For sure. 1.00
00:39:21.000 Well, Steve O's got a dick on his forehead. 1.00
00:39:21.000 For sure. 1.00
00:39:23.000 Yeah, but that's for fun.
00:39:25.000 He's got tattoos on an ATV.
00:39:25.000 Yeah.
00:39:28.000 He was on the podcast, and it was like the first couple of minutes, and I was like, Do you have a dick tattooed above your eyebrows? 0.99
00:39:34.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:39:35.000 What?
00:39:36.000 I've done his pod.
00:39:37.000 I didn't notice that.
00:39:38.000 Good impression.
00:39:39.000 It must be new.
00:39:40.000 I miss it.
00:39:41.000 It's pretty new.
00:39:41.000 Yeah.
00:39:43.000 He was on a few months ago.
00:39:44.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:39:44.000 J Mo. 1.00
00:39:45.000 Not even. 0.99
00:39:45.000 New jackass coming next month. 0.99
00:39:47.000 Yeah, look. 0.99
00:39:48.000 Oh, man. 1.00
00:39:49.000 What a lunatic. 1.00
00:39:51.000 Wow. 1.00
00:39:52.000 Post Malone tattooed him?
00:39:52.000 Yeah, I wouldn't recommend that.
00:39:54.000 Post Malone tattooed his dick. 1.00
00:39:56.000 He's got a straight tattoo artist. 1.00
00:39:58.000 Well, I don't think he has to be trained.
00:40:00.000 Dick's got quite a curve.
00:40:02.000 Are there rules?
00:40:03.000 He might actually know.
00:40:04.000 Are there any rules as to who can do a tattoo?
00:40:08.000 I don't think so.
00:40:09.000 If you're a surge or whatever and have a business, yeah.
00:40:12.000 You could just do it, though.
00:40:14.000 Do one to your friend?
00:40:15.000 I saw fear.
00:40:16.000 You could just do it with pen.
00:40:17.000 Interesting.
00:40:18.000 Huh.
00:40:19.000 Interesting.
00:40:20.000 Steve O's a good egg.
00:40:21.000 He's a fun dude.
00:40:22.000 Steve O rules.
00:40:23.000 He's a fun dude. 0.99
00:40:23.000 Jackass rules. 0.99
00:40:24.000 New jackass. 0.99
00:40:24.000 I was so excited when I heard. 0.99
00:40:26.000 It was like.
00:40:27.000 Oh, they're doing another one?
00:40:28.000 June.
00:40:29.000 Oh!
00:40:29.000 He played a bunch of the scenes where Knoxville did too, them all getting concussions.
00:40:34.000 And I was like, I asked Knoxville how many times he'd been out.
00:40:37.000 He's like, at least 16.
00:40:39.000 Wow.
00:40:39.000 16 times.
00:40:40.000 Out cold.
00:40:41.000 It's funny when one of them gets Reddit rapped for not going hard enough, like Knoxville did once, and he goes, fine.
00:40:47.000 I'll step up and I'll literally blow a ball off.
00:40:50.000 Oh, man.
00:40:50.000 And then Danger had one where he's like, I'll be the one this time.
00:40:53.000 Knoxville always went so hard.
00:40:56.000 Yeah, it was bad feedback.
00:40:58.000 But they were like, you're protecting your face too much.
00:41:00.000 It was like, all right, I'll show you.
00:41:02.000 I asked We Man, I was like, who got PTSD this time?
00:41:04.000 He was like, England. 1.00
00:41:06.000 England's fucked forever now. 1.00
00:41:07.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
00:41:08.000 Why?
00:41:08.000 What?
00:41:09.000 Because they put him in horrible situations.
00:41:11.000 What are they doing?
00:41:12.000 I don't know.
00:41:12.000 I'm waiting to find out.
00:41:14.000 What, Jamie?
00:41:14.000 Are you talking about this one?
00:41:15.000 Because the last one they got him. 0.96
00:41:16.000 No, they got Danger Air last time bad with the bear and shit, where you could tell he's like, this is never going to leave. 0.99
00:41:21.000 And the fucking donkey in the one, that was terrifying. 1.00
00:41:24.000 Donkey. 1.00
00:41:25.000 He just walked up behind when the goal was to get him.
00:41:28.000 It's a kick. 1.00
00:41:28.000 Fucked. 1.00
00:41:29.000 Nuts. 1.00
00:41:29.000 He has to stand behind him. 1.00
00:41:31.000 He's just behind him, like shaking, and they're all making fun of him. 0.90
00:41:33.000 And the donkey kicked him? 0.89
00:41:35.000 Hard. 0.99
00:41:35.000 Yeah, got him right in the balls. 0.99
00:41:36.000 Oh, my God, dude. 0.98
00:41:38.000 They had him get into a room.
00:41:39.000 He obviously knew something was happening.
00:41:41.000 He knew something's up.
00:41:42.000 He just can't be.
00:41:43.000 He looks great.
00:41:44.000 He does look pretty good.
00:41:45.000 Nice skin.
00:41:46.000 He's a full head of hair.
00:41:47.000 He's a handsome guy.
00:41:49.000 So he's in the room strapped to a table.
00:41:50.000 They're doing like an electric chair.
00:41:52.000 They're shocking him.
00:41:53.000 He's like, come on, stop.
00:41:54.000 It's annoying, but I get it.
00:41:56.000 And then what happens?
00:41:57.000 They cover him in honey.
00:41:59.000 Oh, no, Oh, and he's like, Is that meat?
00:42:09.000 Oh, God. 1.00
00:42:15.000 Oh, shit. 0.99
00:42:16.000 Something's opening. 1.00
00:42:22.000 He's got a chain on the bear.
00:42:25.000 Keep watching it.
00:42:27.000 The chain is probably just so they could pull him off.
00:42:30.000 Yeah.
00:42:31.000 Stay calm. 0.98
00:42:32.000 Oh, he's gonna lick him. 0.68
00:42:36.000 The chain's not attached to anything. 0.77
00:42:38.000 That's a good point.
00:42:38.000 Chain's free.
00:42:42.000 Oh, this is wild.
00:42:43.000 This is crazy.
00:42:46.000 Are you really allergic to bees, Aaron?
00:42:53.000 He's trembling.
00:42:54.000 And then they shock him.
00:42:55.000 What?
00:42:55.000 Shocking him.
00:42:56.000 I didn't even get the answer.
00:42:59.000 No, no.
00:43:01.000 All right, we can't really.
00:43:03.000 Oh, is that like salmon?
00:43:04.000 Oh my god.
00:43:07.000 Yeah, I think so.
00:43:09.000 Oh, this is crazy.
00:43:12.000 He's so frightened.
00:43:15.000 Oh, he's got the paw.
00:43:16.000 There's nothing more in there.
00:43:18.000 There's nothing more in there.
00:43:18.000 There is, though.
00:43:20.000 That's not so bad.
00:43:21.000 What if he just came?
00:43:22.000 That's kind of nice.
00:43:24.000 You see his pants get wet? 1.00
00:43:26.000 They fucked with him real bad, though. 0.99
00:43:28.000 This was. 1.00
00:43:30.000 Get him out, get him out.
00:43:31.000 So it's a trained bear.
00:43:32.000 Sort of, though, but it's a bear.
00:43:34.000 Yeah.
00:43:35.000 You know what's nice is Bam. 0.69
00:43:36.000 They let Bam back in the group.
00:43:38.000 Oh, good.
00:43:38.000 Oh, really?
00:43:39.000 He's in the next one.
00:43:40.000 I heard he's skating again.
00:43:41.000 Yeah.
00:43:42.000 Westchester, but he's.
00:43:43.000 Skip there.
00:43:44.000 So, what happened to him?
00:43:45.000 He just went off the rails.
00:43:46.000 Drugs, pills.
00:43:47.000 Yeah, filling stuff.
00:43:49.000 Now he's back.
00:43:50.000 Nice.
00:43:50.000 He's back.
00:43:51.000 Come back.
00:43:51.000 Let's go.
00:43:52.000 Bam rules. 0.89
00:43:53.000 There's a video I saw, and it was asking all the Jackass people who can skate.
00:43:57.000 And people were like, no, We Man's pretty good.
00:43:58.000 And then someone was like, no, Danger Aaron's pretty good.
00:44:00.000 And then it just starts the Chiron just going, it's Bam.
00:44:02.000 And then John Knoxville's like, I can go to Ollie.
00:44:05.000 It's Bam.
00:44:07.000 I met him a bunch when I was going to college.
00:44:07.000 Bam was good.
00:44:09.000 Really?
00:44:10.000 Yeah, I went to college in Westchester where they all were.
00:44:13.000 So, like, yeah, you'd see him around town.
00:44:15.000 He was just the nicest.
00:44:16.000 Yeah.
00:44:16.000 He was always just the man.
00:44:17.000 He owned that town, huh?
00:44:18.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
00:44:19.000 You'd have a purple Lambo. 1.00
00:44:20.000 You'd see it. 1.00
00:44:22.000 It'd be at the fucking Wawa. 1.00
00:44:23.000 You'd be like, holy fuck, Bam's here. 1.00
00:44:25.000 Holy fuck. 1.00
00:44:26.000 Holy. 1.00
00:44:27.000 With his eyeliner.
00:44:28.000 Yeah.
00:44:28.000 I drove by Castle Bam.
00:44:31.000 You know the house they have?
00:44:32.000 Viva La Bam.
00:44:32.000 It was right where I lived when we were filming tires.
00:44:34.000 I lived right next to it, and I would occasionally just drive over and look at it.
00:44:37.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:44:38.000 Every kid's dreams skateboard shit in the back. 0.99
00:44:40.000 It's some trick that was off a bridge, onto a moving bus, and then off the bus onto the road. 0.99
00:44:46.000 I think you'd think of the video game.
00:44:48.000 Oh, I love the game.
00:44:50.000 Maybe, but no.
00:44:51.000 This was real. 0.99
00:44:52.000 Bam's dad got fucked pretty hard, though. 0.99
00:44:54.000 Well, they were just punching him in the face for no reason. 0.99
00:44:54.000 What happened? 0.99
00:44:57.000 Phil. 0.97
00:44:58.000 They were just going to wake him up and just start punching him in the face. 0.98
00:45:01.000 It was great.
00:45:02.000 Sweetest man on the planet.
00:45:03.000 Cut it out.
00:45:03.000 Come on, man.
00:45:04.000 Fucking real. 0.99
00:45:04.000 CKY. 0.99
00:45:04.000 I'm sleeping. 0.99
00:45:05.000 Crazy that those guys did that for so long.
00:45:08.000 Oh, yeah.
00:45:09.000 That seemed like a thing you could only do once.
00:45:12.000 Hell, they're still going.
00:45:13.000 Yeah, no worries.
00:45:14.000 The first places I ever did stand up and host my own show was his bar in Westchester.
00:45:18.000 Wow.
00:45:19.000 The note.
00:45:20.000 Like, how old did they?
00:45:21.000 Like, how old is Steve O?
00:45:22.000 It's.
00:45:23.000 He's got to be 50.
00:45:24.000 Yeah.
00:45:25.000 50.
00:45:26.000 Here, look with a.
00:45:28.000 What are you going to do to him?
00:45:31.000 Oh.
00:45:32.000 Oh, the dad finally gets his revenge.
00:45:34.000 He's hiding behind the door.
00:45:35.000 I thought he was going to beat him up.
00:45:39.000 Yeah.
00:45:40.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:45:40.000 Jackass rules. 0.99
00:45:40.000 That's all right. 0.99
00:45:41.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:45:42.000 Jackass is the best.
00:45:43.000 It's the best comedies.
00:45:44.000 That was a.
00:45:46.000 Just crazy that those guys made a career doing that. 0.99
00:45:48.000 Became famous just fucking each other up. 0.99
00:45:48.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:45:48.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:45:50.000 We all copied them.
00:45:51.000 Me and my friends were. 0.99
00:45:52.000 Outside, filming us jumping into trees off of Bruce and shit. 0.99
00:45:56.000 Totally. 0.98
00:45:56.000 We all were like, this is the coolest thing ever. 0.98
00:45:58.000 Yeah.
00:45:59.000 They were the first ones to be like, don't do this.
00:46:02.000 Anyway, that's the legal part.
00:46:03.000 Now watch and try to do it. 1.00
00:46:04.000 This shit's fun. 1.00
00:46:05.000 We're having a blast, though. 1.00
00:46:07.000 You should try it, but don't do it legally.
00:46:09.000 Yeah.
00:46:10.000 How is the new Fear Factor?
00:46:11.000 I know Knoxville's hosting.
00:46:12.000 Is it the new Fear Factor?
00:46:13.000 Knoxville's hosting.
00:46:13.000 I haven't seen it.
00:46:15.000 Knoxville, yeah.
00:46:16.000 He came on to promote it.
00:46:17.000 He was hosting the new Fear Factor.
00:46:17.000 Yeah.
00:46:19.000 It's very nice.
00:46:20.000 I love Jackass so much.
00:46:22.000 He's a good dude.
00:46:22.000 Yeah, me too.
00:46:24.000 Johnny Knoxville's a really nice guy.
00:46:25.000 Coolest. 1.00
00:46:26.000 Although his dick is broken. 1.00
00:46:26.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:46:27.000 That sucks. 0.94
00:46:28.000 I think it's fixed. 0.96
00:46:29.000 Oh, great.
00:46:30.000 Fix that nowadays.
00:46:30.000 I think they fixed it.
00:46:31.000 Just to pop it up.
00:46:32.000 Stem cells.
00:46:33.000 Everyone's getting them.
00:46:35.000 I got them. 0.99
00:46:36.000 Everyone's getting dicks these days, dude. 0.98
00:46:37.000 Wait, you got stem? 0.98
00:46:38.000 Yeah.
00:46:39.000 His knees.
00:46:39.000 Whoa.
00:46:40.000 What does that mean?
00:46:41.000 It's been one day.
00:46:41.000 I don't know.
00:46:42.000 How do you feel?
00:46:42.000 I don't know.
00:46:43.000 I feel fine.
00:46:44.000 Did you see that thing that I sent you today?
00:46:45.000 No.
00:46:46.000 I sent you an article with this video.
00:46:48.000 This lady is saying that the one operation that has the least amount of success and is the most unnecessary is meniscus operations.
00:46:55.000 Mmm.
00:46:56.000 I had one too.
00:46:57.000 I couldn't walk though.
00:46:58.000 What do you mean?
00:46:59.000 I had to do it.
00:46:59.000 They said rehabilitation is better.
00:47:01.000 Like keeping the tissue in there and rehabbing it is better than having it removed.
00:47:06.000 Yeah.
00:47:06.000 Interesting.
00:47:07.000 I don't know.
00:47:08.000 I had mine removed on my left leg.
00:47:10.000 Yeah. 0.98
00:47:11.000 But it does fuck with me more than my right leg. 0.96
00:47:12.000 And what'd you have on the right leg? 0.98
00:47:14.000 Just, I have a tear, a meniscus tear, but I just.
00:47:16.000 And you just left it? 0.99
00:47:17.000 Step-selled.
00:47:17.000 Yeah.
00:47:18.000 Tear-selled it.
00:47:19.000 I tore it doing a kicking contest with Joe Schilling.
00:47:23.000 With jeans on.
00:47:23.000 Whoa.
00:47:25.000 You're a jackass. 1.00
00:47:26.000 Jeans on. 1.00
00:47:26.000 That's what he's talking about. 1.00
00:47:27.000 He's totally jackass. 0.99
00:47:28.000 He just wanted to see who could kick harder. 1.00
00:47:30.000 Like, he heard I kick really hard.
00:47:31.000 He's a world champion kickboxer, so he wanted to kick this thing, and he wanted me to kick it.
00:47:34.000 I did it with jeans on.
00:47:36.000 What'd you do, a bag at the arcade?
00:47:38.000 We have this machine in the back.
00:47:39.000 A lot of tests.
00:47:39.000 You hit it, and it shows you.
00:47:41.000 You tore your meniscus on that? 1.00
00:47:42.000 Because you fucking rocked that. 1.00
00:47:44.000 With no warm up at all at 52 years old. 1.00
00:47:48.000 Just fucking slammed it. 0.99
00:47:49.000 Joe Shirley came in three hours early and stretching. 0.99
00:47:51.000 No, he didn't.
00:47:52.000 He did no warm up either. 0.99
00:47:54.000 That would be a great jackass. 1.00
00:47:55.000 Joe Rogan kicks you. 1.00
00:47:57.000 He had Butterbean punch him. 0.87
00:47:57.000 Yeah, that would be bad. 0.87
00:47:59.000 I saw that.
00:48:00.000 It's the hardest thing to watch, too. 0.98
00:48:01.000 Because he was already rocked and fucked up, and then Butterbean put him out. 0.95
00:48:04.000 And they're in like a Target or something. 0.98
00:48:05.000 Yeah, they go to a Bodega or something.
00:48:07.000 Yeah.
00:48:07.000 They have the crazy.
00:48:08.000 The extra level, though, is that it's not just somebody. 0.77
00:48:10.000 It's Butterbean punching you.
00:48:11.000 Or it's not just taking a slap shot. 1.00
00:48:13.000 It's somebody from the Predators fucking slap shotting it at your face. 1.00
00:48:16.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:48:18.000 He had Francis and Gano punch him in the balls. 0.99
00:48:18.000 Oh, that's right. 0.99
00:48:21.000 The cup test.
00:48:22.000 They just kept telling him, like, your fighter's going to come today, and they didn't tell him it's Francis and Gano.
00:48:22.000 Oh, God.
00:48:26.000 Oh, my God.
00:48:27.000 It's hilarious.
00:48:28.000 Oh, my God.
00:48:29.000 Oh, there he is.
00:48:31.000 This is mean.
00:48:32.000 I mean, this is too far.
00:48:34.000 I can't watch this.
00:48:35.000 Watch it.
00:48:35.000 Yeah, you can.
00:48:36.000 Let's watch it.
00:48:36.000 Watch this.
00:48:36.000 All right.
00:48:37.000 And Francis doesn't even hold back. 0.99
00:48:42.000 Oh, I mean, that's going to ruin your junk. 0.99
00:48:44.000 Oh, dude. 0.99
00:48:45.000 That kind of pain is crazy.
00:48:47.000 Also, that's a terrible cup. 0.99
00:48:48.000 That's a shitty cup. 0.97
00:48:49.000 No one should ever doubt danger ever again. 0.99
00:48:52.000 Watch this one more time.
00:48:54.000 Oh my God.
00:48:55.000 Bro, he put all of his 265 pounds in a bag.
00:48:58.000 The realization on his face when he was like, it's worse than I thought it was going to be, and it's real. 1.00
00:49:03.000 Bro, it's like getting hit by a car right on your dick. 1.00
00:49:06.000 That's brutal. 1.00
00:49:07.000 Look at the eyes change.
00:49:07.000 Right.
00:49:09.000 And the thing about those shitty cups is sometimes those shitty cups hit your nut. 1.00
00:49:13.000 Like the cup actually, your balls are kind of like poking out the side a little bit, and the cup slams into your nut. 0.99
00:49:18.000 It's also, it's not, they just got this at Target on the way to this. 0.98
00:49:21.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:49:22.000 They were just like, I don't know, it's going to be one.
00:49:22.000 It was fitted.
00:49:24.000 Real solid cup with a compression shorts. 0.97
00:49:29.000 See, Gen Z or Gen Alpha will never have a jackass. 0.89
00:49:32.000 No, I think those are mean. 0.96
00:49:32.000 You don't think so? 0.96
00:49:34.000 But what about these streamers that keep getting beat up?
00:49:35.000 Yeah, they're kidding.
00:49:36.000 Oh, is that a thing? 0.99
00:49:37.000 Yeah, these streamers are like picking fights at people and getting fucked up. 0.99
00:49:40.000 All right. 0.99
00:49:41.000 All right. 0.99
00:49:42.000 Yeah, there's a lot of streamers that are getting that fuck beaten out of them. 0.99
00:49:44.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:49:45.000 In a good way?
00:49:46.000 Well, I mean, they're getting, they're provoking people and occasionally they provoke the wrong person.
00:49:50.000 They fight club it until somebody picks a fight back with them.
00:49:52.000 There's this one with Tiki.
00:49:54.000 Tiki fought for the UFC.
00:49:55.000 He's like a top level trainer, manages fighters. 0.99
00:49:58.000 And this streamer kid is in his face telling him he's going to fuck him up. 0.98
00:50:01.000 And Tiki's like, Oh, really? 1.00
00:50:03.000 And he's like, Yeah, I'll fuck you up for sure. 0.99
00:50:05.000 And then he moves too close to him and Tiki just cracks him. 1.00
00:50:08.000 Is that the elbow?
00:50:09.000 No, I think he punched him.
00:50:10.000 I don't know if he elbowed him or punched him.
00:50:11.000 It's so hard to tell because it happened so fast.
00:50:14.000 But it's like the dude's in his face.
00:50:15.000 And this is a dude, this guy, watch this.
00:50:17.000 And he's got a drink in his hand.
00:50:19.000 Yeah.
00:50:20.000 Is it an elbow?
00:50:21.000 Slow that down a little bit.
00:50:21.000 That was right on the jaw.
00:50:23.000 It either is a punch or an elbow.
00:50:25.000 It's hard to say because it happened so fast.
00:50:26.000 Yeah, it's an elbow.
00:50:28.000 He dropped the drink.
00:50:28.000 What did he say to him?
00:50:29.000 Nice elbow.
00:50:30.000 Is that sure that was an elbow? 1.00
00:50:31.000 He said he was going to fuck him up. 1.00
00:50:33.000 He said he was going to slap him. 1.00
00:50:35.000 I'll slap the shit out of you. 1.00
00:50:36.000 Something like that. 1.00
00:50:37.000 No, but is that just cause? 1.00
00:50:39.000 Yeah, I thought he's the wrong guy to fuck with. 1.00
00:50:41.000 Right. 0.99
00:50:41.000 Like, Tiki's really good. 0.99
00:50:43.000 Tiki Masala.
00:50:44.000 He's big. 1.00
00:50:45.000 Even if he didn't do UFC, I wouldn't walk up to him and be like, what are you going to do, pussy? 1.00
00:50:45.000 I wouldn't. 1.00
00:50:49.000 Exactly. 1.00
00:50:49.000 He's crazy. 1.00
00:50:50.000 I knew to drop it. 0.97
00:50:51.000 But he's holding whiskey.
00:50:53.000 Well, that's probably why he didn't come out.
00:50:54.000 He's so calm until the second, but he dropped it.
00:50:56.000 He let it go.
00:50:57.000 Yeah.
00:50:57.000 Drops.
00:50:58.000 And elbows.
00:50:58.000 Oh, really?
00:50:59.000 Nice technique, dude.
00:51:00.000 One more time on that, Jamie.
00:51:01.000 One more time.
00:51:02.000 The kids look like really.
00:51:02.000 That was a hook.
00:51:04.000 Well, the elbow's just as powerful, dude. 0.81
00:51:06.000 Especially coming out of Tiki.
00:51:08.000 So let's see what he says to him. 1.00
00:51:09.000 He said a bunch of shit to him. 1.00
00:51:11.000 What? 1.00
00:51:12.000 I said straight up.
00:51:13.000 Are you the guy that got slapped on video? 1.00
00:51:15.000 I did, but I'll slap the shit out, you know. 1.00
00:51:16.000 Oh, you were? 1.00
00:51:18.000 I'm gonna show you the inside of the house.
00:51:21.000 No, wait, no, I'll make you another clip.
00:51:23.000 Don't do that.
00:51:24.000 Seriously?
00:51:25.000 Don't do that.
00:51:29.000 There's you.
00:51:29.000 Oh!
00:51:30.000 Oh! 0.99
00:51:31.000 But some of these streamers, man, they make their whole fucking career out of doing stuff like that. 0.97
00:51:36.000 Who's that guy? 0.98
00:51:36.000 He got up. 0.98
00:51:37.000 Wow, he got up?
00:51:38.000 It's hard to say what's going on.
00:51:40.000 Or is that the bouncer?
00:51:42.000 Oh, it's not him.
00:51:42.000 It's hard to say what's happening.
00:51:44.000 It is hard to say.
00:51:45.000 It's not him that got up again.
00:51:46.000 It's a girl or something.
00:51:47.000 Well, I think he probably got up too because I see the black jacket.
00:51:51.000 But it seems like he ran in there.
00:51:53.000 That's him.
00:51:53.000 Ran in there after him and threw a couple punches at him.
00:51:56.000 I mean, the fact that he took that is pretty impressive.
00:51:58.000 I would have gone night night.
00:52:01.000 Yeah, but you wouldn't have been there.
00:52:03.000 I wouldn't have been there. 1.00
00:52:04.000 I'll fucking knock you out. 1.00
00:52:05.000 You would have never done that in the first fight. 1.00
00:52:06.000 The whole thing is crazy. 1.00
00:52:08.000 I'd be like, hey, he was talking more shit on the way up. 1.00
00:52:09.000 There's so many of these guys that are picking fights. 0.99
00:52:11.000 They're just doing anything they can to get attention to go viral. 1.00
00:52:14.000 Damn. 1.00
00:52:15.000 It's like a nightmare. 1.00
00:52:16.000 Walking down the street, and someone's like, What's up, bitch? 1.00
00:52:19.000 Oh, boy. 1.00
00:52:20.000 Well, I'm going to look like a pussy. 1.00
00:52:22.000 I hate those. 1.00
00:52:22.000 I'm not going to do that. 1.00
00:52:23.000 It's some guy with his girlfriend at Target, and they just start mocking him and mocking the girlfriend, forcing his hand. 0.98
00:52:29.000 That's sex. 0.98
00:52:30.000 Dude, I'm just trying to shop. 0.98
00:52:31.000 I don't want to fight you.
00:52:32.000 Who are you?
00:52:33.000 That's how people get shot.
00:52:34.000 Yeah.
00:52:35.000 Yeah.
00:52:35.000 For sure.
00:52:35.000 You do it in the wrong place.
00:52:37.000 It's terrible.
00:52:38.000 But it's just these kids today.
00:52:40.000 There's so many of them that are just trying to get famous.
00:52:42.000 The number one thing that kids want today is to get famous.
00:52:45.000 You know, they used to do a list.
00:52:46.000 What do you want to do when you grow up?
00:52:48.000 What are your goals?
00:52:49.000 Like a giant percentage of them are get famous.
00:52:51.000 That's true. 1.00
00:52:52.000 What's up with that clavicular homo? 1.00
00:52:55.000 You know what I'm talking about? 1.00
00:52:56.000 I think he's the opposite of a homo. 1.00
00:52:56.000 I don't see any look at it. 1.00
00:52:58.000 I think his whole thing is looks maxing to get chicks. 0.99
00:53:00.000 That sounds gay to me. 1.00
00:53:02.000 Looks maxing. 0.99
00:53:02.000 What is looks maxing? 0.99
00:53:04.000 Well, one of the things he does apparently hits his face with a hammer to put micro breaks in his face to make his jaw look more like a chick. 1.00
00:53:11.000 You're just man to man trans. 0.88
00:53:11.000 That's strong. 0.88
00:53:13.000 There you go. 1.00
00:53:14.000 Oh, man to man trans. 1.00
00:53:15.000 Yeah, you've just altered your looks to make yourself more of a gender. 1.00
00:53:19.000 Wow. 1.00
00:53:19.000 Yes. 1.00
00:53:20.000 Interesting.
00:53:21.000 Gender affirming.
00:53:21.000 Yeah, it's gender affirming.
00:53:23.000 Is that trans for girls? 0.99
00:53:24.000 Let's do it. 0.97
00:53:24.000 Yeah. 0.97
00:53:25.000 Absolutely.
00:53:26.000 I like it. 1.00
00:53:26.000 No, don't take fake tits. 1.00
00:53:28.000 Leave fake tits, but you can't fucking make us. 1.00
00:53:30.000 It's gender affirming. 1.00
00:53:31.000 If you're like, men look this way, then you're like, all right. 0.80
00:53:35.000 So it's like you can be something you're not.
00:53:37.000 I don't know.
00:53:39.000 He gets laid, though.
00:53:40.000 Oh, I'm sure he does.
00:53:40.000 I'm sure.
00:53:41.000 He's a handsome fellow.
00:53:42.000 Yeah, he's a handsome.
00:53:42.000 He's very handsome.
00:53:43.000 But he's like, apparently he does meth.
00:53:45.000 Yeah, he talks about it because he finds it better than Adderall for controlling his appetite.
00:53:51.000 That'll do it.
00:53:52.000 Like, this is the thing.
00:53:53.000 Like, they want to be lean.
00:53:54.000 The wheels are going to come off.
00:53:55.000 Yeah.
00:53:55.000 You can't do meth, but.
00:53:58.000 It's entertaining.
00:54:00.000 How about just self will?
00:54:02.000 This is when you overdosed the other day on stream.
00:54:02.000 I don't think.
00:54:04.000 Oh, no, no, no.
00:54:05.000 It's easy.
00:54:06.000 What did he overdose on?
00:54:08.000 I don't.
00:54:09.000 Which one is he?
00:54:10.000 That guy?
00:54:12.000 That's him.
00:54:13.000 Yeah, he is handsome.
00:54:13.000 I think it's a longer clip.
00:54:14.000 He's pretty handsome.
00:54:15.000 So, would he just fall apart?
00:54:16.000 Oh, they took it off the camera.
00:54:18.000 But, yeah, he's just like falling down a cahoe.
00:54:20.000 You know what? 0.86
00:54:20.000 He's about to be dead. 0.86
00:54:21.000 I actually saw this, and what was cool about it was how nice he was to everybody.
00:54:25.000 Oh.
00:54:25.000 Like, even while he's like.
00:54:27.000 He's like, people are coming up.
00:54:27.000 Overdosing.
00:54:28.000 Can I get a picture?
00:54:29.000 He's like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:54:31.000 He's probably on Molly.
00:54:33.000 He looks like he's having an eight.
00:54:34.000 Definitely Molly.
00:54:35.000 Yeah, it could be Molly.
00:54:36.000 That may be why he's so nice to everybody. 1.00
00:54:38.000 Yeah, that's not a K hole. 1.00
00:54:39.000 I've been in one of those. 1.00
00:54:40.000 You don't smile.
00:54:41.000 Yeah.
00:54:41.000 Oh, really?
00:54:42.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
00:54:43.000 But is that overdosing or is he just on it? 1.00
00:54:46.000 That's why the clips are going around saying overdosing.
00:54:48.000 It's for toys.
00:54:49.000 It's not overdosing.
00:54:50.000 It's for toys.
00:54:50.000 It's just chester maxing.
00:54:51.000 It's just chester maxing.
00:54:51.000 It's not overdosing.
00:54:52.000 It's so funny.
00:54:53.000 These terms.
00:54:54.000 Look, he's like a boy band.
00:54:55.000 Mocking and streamer.
00:54:57.000 Everything is toxic and dangerous.
00:54:57.000 It's hilarious.
00:54:59.000 Look at the streamer looks maxing.
00:55:00.000 Culture is tough.
00:55:02.000 Culture.
00:55:03.000 What is gooning?
00:55:04.000 Culture.
00:55:04.000 What is gooning?
00:55:05.000 Gooning is a thing.
00:55:06.000 We've had this argument.
00:55:07.000 What's gooning?
00:55:09.000 Masturbating to just really obsessing over anything.
00:55:13.000 It's hilarious.
00:55:14.000 Okay.
00:55:15.000 So, like a stalker is gooning.
00:55:16.000 Ooh, could be.
00:55:18.000 I don't know if you're getting that right.
00:55:19.000 Double goon.
00:55:19.000 It's a ridge.
00:55:20.000 It just means like you're obsessed over something, which is like masturbation all the time, and then it's become like obsession.
00:55:27.000 But I think it stayed with masturbation. 0.99
00:55:28.000 It's definitely just masturbating. 0.99
00:55:30.000 It's basically just being as horny as you can fucking be, and it's very funny. 0.99
00:55:33.000 All right. 0.99
00:55:34.000 I've gooned quite a bit in my day.
00:55:36.000 Yeah.
00:55:36.000 Oh, yeah.
00:55:37.000 You're a gooner.
00:55:38.000 I'm a gooner.
00:55:38.000 Yeah.
00:55:39.000 All right.
00:55:40.000 What?
00:55:40.000 I'm feeling beer.
00:55:41.000 Can I get one of them beers?
00:55:42.000 Yeah, it's beer time.
00:55:43.000 I feel like one of those.
00:55:44.000 Joe Rogan's back.
00:55:45.000 Yeah.
00:55:46.000 Eight months off the sauce.
00:55:49.000 Moderation.
00:55:49.000 Wow.
00:55:51.000 Moderation is the key.
00:55:52.000 He went on a drinking withdrawal until Trump said he could do mushrooms as well.
00:55:57.000 And he goes, okay, fine.
00:55:58.000 Fine, I'll drink it.
00:55:59.000 What was that like, being in the Oval Off? 0.99
00:56:01.000 Pretty fucking strange. 0.97
00:56:02.000 The whole thing was strange. 0.91
00:56:03.000 How about sending him a text message explaining everything to him and him saying, let's do it?
00:56:07.000 Wow.
00:56:09.000 Dude, let's do it.
00:56:10.000 And then the next day, he keeps saying, yeah, let's do it.
00:56:13.000 He's getting texts from BB. 1.00
00:56:15.000 He goes, Yeah, fuck it. 1.00
00:56:17.000 It always works out for me. 1.00
00:56:19.000 Shut down the straight. 1.00
00:56:19.000 He's a fuck. 1.00
00:56:21.000 He showed up at the UFC event. 1.00
00:56:23.000 He shakes my hand.
00:56:24.000 He goes, It's done.
00:56:25.000 And then a week later, we were in the White House with all the vets, all those vets that had taken Ibergain and saved their life.
00:56:31.000 You should have had, okay, it's a missed opportunity.
00:56:34.000 You should have had all those vets and then a couple like dreadlocked white guys who were also like, This is going to help me a lot. 0.99
00:56:39.000 This is going to fucking rule. 0.98
00:56:40.000 I should have had Duncan. 0.99
00:56:41.000 I should have Duncan.
00:56:42.000 Duncan dressed like a shaman.
00:56:45.000 Everyone's going to benefit from this.
00:56:47.000 With a hat on like you're wearing? 1.00
00:56:49.000 You should have wore that fucking hat. 1.00
00:56:52.000 With a suit behind the brother. 1.00
00:56:54.000 Well, I had a suit, jacket, and everything.
00:56:56.000 I was prepared, but it was in the other room.
00:56:57.000 But he goes, come on in the Oval Office.
00:56:59.000 So he brought me in the Oval Office early.
00:57:01.000 You were not wearing a suit?
00:57:02.000 I didn't see that.
00:57:03.000 I had a jacket.
00:57:03.000 A suit jacket.
00:57:04.000 I was going to wear a tie, but I hate ties.
00:57:04.000 I didn't have a tie.
00:57:06.000 I said, let me just dress like I dress at the UFC.
00:57:08.000 Like, man. 0.99
00:57:08.000 So I wore my UFC fucking outfit. 0.99
00:57:10.000 So you were like Zelinsky in a tracksuit. 0.99
00:57:12.000 No, I had a nice button up shirt, nice pair of pants, nice dress shoes.
00:57:16.000 Yeah.
00:57:17.000 I was respectable, but I just wasn't wearing a tie.
00:57:19.000 But I did have a suit jacket, but it was in the other room.
00:57:21.000 But he dragged me into the Oval Office.
00:57:23.000 Come over here.
00:57:23.000 Look at this.
00:57:24.000 It looks so beautiful now.
00:57:25.000 He's like showing me all the new gold work.
00:57:27.000 The Oval Office has like gold everywhere now, it's like all gold leaf everywhere.
00:57:31.000 It's pretty impressive. 1.00
00:57:32.000 Who designed the Persians? 1.00
00:57:33.000 It's him. 0.99
00:57:34.000 Oh, yeah.
00:57:34.000 He loves gold.
00:57:35.000 Definitely not the Persians. 0.97
00:57:36.000 Bin Laden loved gold. 0.99
00:57:38.000 He loves doing up the Oval Office.
00:57:38.000 He loves it.
00:57:41.000 Shane and I took a tour.
00:57:42.000 Yeah, see you in Oklahoma.
00:57:43.000 Wait, what?
00:57:44.000 They took a tour of the White House.
00:57:45.000 When?
00:57:46.000 Two years ago?
00:57:47.000 A year.
00:57:47.000 No, no.
00:57:47.000 A year.
00:57:48.000 Biden years?
00:57:49.000 No, Trump years.
00:57:50.000 He wasn't there, so we got in, but they're like, you can't go into the Oval Office.
00:57:53.000 And we're like craning our head in with our feet just on the outside.
00:57:57.000 Like, hold my hand.
00:57:59.000 Saw the big Gulf of America.
00:58:00.000 Oh, this is back, yeah.
00:58:02.000 He had literally just had a map next to his desk that says Gulf of America. 0.99
00:58:05.000 You're like, damn. 0.99
00:58:06.000 It's a map of water. 1.00
00:58:07.000 God damn. 1.00
00:58:08.000 Especially because you're like walking through and you're like, damn, Lincoln's. 0.99
00:58:10.000 There's a lot of these cool things. 0.97
00:58:12.000 And then you see Gulf of America next to the desk.
00:58:15.000 You're like, hey, what is that really gross bill that they just passed, though?
00:58:19.000 What is that FISA bill that they just passed, Jamie?
00:58:22.000 Ugh.
00:58:23.000 Yeah, something just happened where people are freaking out.
00:58:26.000 Gross bill.
00:58:27.000 It's something.
00:58:29.000 It has something to do with them being able to look into all your private communications without a warrant.
00:58:35.000 Oh, I don't like that.
00:58:35.000 Is there a new one?
00:58:36.000 Someone told me that every new car is going to have AI testing to see if you're drunk or not.
00:58:41.000 And then they also won't abuse it in 2027.
00:58:43.000 Bad news.
00:58:44.000 Wait, what was it?
00:58:45.000 Look at you while you're driving to make sure that you're not hammered, get video of you.
00:58:50.000 No one's smoking joints or beer.
00:58:51.000 Get a car drive.
00:58:52.000 Get an old car.
00:58:53.000 That's what I got.
00:58:54.000 Is that a real thing?
00:58:54.000 Get an old Mustang.
00:58:55.000 I'm not going to send it.
00:58:56.000 Likely to reject the House pass.
00:58:57.000 Good.
00:58:58.000 Thank God. 0.52
00:58:59.000 We should force them to reject it.
00:59:00.000 Jesus Christ, this is crazy.
00:59:02.000 Three year extension of Section 702 Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act allows the federal government to collect communications of non citizens outside the U.S., though it often includes communications with American citizens.
00:59:15.000 But then if they suspect you of it, like with Tucker, Tucker was communicating with Putin's people to do an interview through Signal.
00:59:24.000 So they took his encoded, so it's all encrypted.
00:59:29.000 They took his encrypted signal and they decrypted it.
00:59:32.000 Someone who knows this stuff explained to me said it cost about $600,000 to do that.
00:59:38.000 They said they can decrypt encrypted messages, they just have to get the data.
00:59:43.000 So, somehow or another, they got the data off of his phone, they unencrypted it, and then they contacted him and said, We know that you're meeting with Putin. 0.98
00:59:51.000 He's like, How the fuck do you know?
00:59:52.000 They're like, We read your signal. 0.99
00:59:53.000 And he's like, What?
00:59:55.000 But he's like, Yeah, I mean, I am meeting with him.
00:59:56.000 I'm doing an interview.
00:59:57.000 I'm a journalist.
00:59:58.000 Yeah, well, that was his position.
00:59:59.000 But it was also his position that he's using an encrypted app, unless they're suspecting him of a crime.
01:00:05.000 They shouldn't be able to look at his encrypted messages. 0.98
01:00:09.000 So, like this idea that you're sending things on Signal and no one can read them, I think that's bullshit. 0.95
01:00:14.000 I think it's more difficult to read them. 0.94
01:00:16.000 So, local cops are not going to do it if you're just buying Molly.
01:00:19.000 Right. 1.00
01:00:19.000 That's not worth $600,000. 1.00
01:00:20.000 Exactly. 0.97
01:00:21.000 Didn't Heg Seth shit get leaked too on Signal? 0.99
01:00:21.000 Right. 0.99
01:00:25.000 Remember that, like a year ago?
01:00:26.000 I think that was because those people accidentally included a journalist. 0.99
01:00:31.000 So, it was like a giant group of like 10 people or something like that, and one of them was a fucking journalist. 0.98
01:00:36.000 These knuckleheads, and the journalists just released all the text messages. 0.98
01:00:40.000 So they're sending emojis after we bombed Iran. 0.77
01:00:42.000 Here's a fun story today. 0.99
01:00:43.000 Wait, that guy?
01:00:44.000 Suicide note, purportedly written by Jeffrey Epstein weeks before his death in jail, has been kept secret for years, locked up in a courthouse.
01:00:50.000 That means investigators scrutinizing his death lacked what could have been a key piece of evidence.
01:00:54.000 In the last hour, they're saying there's a note they found that just.
01:00:57.000 There's a brand new note for it.
01:00:59.000 It just all of a sudden exists.
01:01:00.000 No one says they haven't shown it or said what it says.
01:01:03.000 They're just.
01:01:04.000 Everyone's not reporting. 0.99
01:01:05.000 Well, how about the fucking autopsy that says that his prostate was unremarkable? 0.99
01:01:10.000 But meanwhile, he had his prostate removed. 1.00
01:01:12.000 Oh boy.
01:01:14.000 There's a lot of people that don't even believe he died.
01:01:15.000 I think he's alive.
01:01:16.000 I think they just face-offed him and he's living a good life somewhere.
01:01:20.000 You just changed him.
01:01:22.000 Yeah, I think the people that all go to that stuff, like, don't worry.
01:01:24.000 If we kill you, then we're all worried about ourselves. 0.73
01:01:26.000 We're just going to relocate you. 1.00
01:01:28.000 Israel, maybe. 0.97
01:01:28.000 Israel. 0.97
01:01:29.000 That's what I heard from Metzger.
01:01:31.000 From Metzger. 0.97
01:01:32.000 It wouldn't be Israel. 1.00
01:01:33.000 He'd live somewhere like. 1.00
01:01:34.000 Why wouldn't he live in Israel?
01:01:35.000 That's the place where he's most protected. 1.00
01:01:36.000 It'd be like Cambodia. 0.99
01:01:38.000 No, they'll kill him in Cambodia. 1.00
01:01:40.000 You've got to live in Israel. 0.92
01:01:41.000 No, there's parents in Israel.
01:01:43.000 Yeah, but do you know that's like the number one place where like sex offenders go from America that are Jewish?
01:01:43.000 Of who?
01:01:49.000 They're in trouble.
01:01:49.000 Yeah.
01:01:50.000 They don't take anybody in.
01:01:51.000 Yeah.
01:01:51.000 I didn't know that.
01:01:52.000 They take anybody in.
01:01:53.000 Yeah, especially Jewish people. 1.00
01:01:54.000 They'll just take you. 1.00
01:01:56.000 Wow, Jews have had a run. 1.00
01:01:57.000 You had Madoff, Weinstein, Epstein. 0.99
01:01:59.000 Weinstein.
01:02:00.000 Hell yeah, thank you.
01:02:00.000 The other guy.
01:02:02.000 Nice.
01:02:03.000 Hell of a run, you guys.
01:02:03.000 Cosby Berg.
01:02:05.000 Yeah.
01:02:08.000 Yeah.
01:02:09.000 Kind of proves Kanye's point a little bit. 1.00
01:02:10.000 I don't love the Kimmel shit, it's annoying. 1.00
01:02:13.000 Like the fighting with Kimmel over the jokes. 1.00
01:02:15.000 Like, come on, man.
01:02:16.000 I mean, here's the thing about that joke.
01:02:18.000 Adam Carolla had a really good point.
01:02:19.000 He said that joke, he said that joke on a Thursday. 0.99
01:02:23.000 On Friday, nobody gave a shit. 1.00
01:02:24.000 Who gave a shit? 0.99
01:02:26.000 Kimmel. 1.00
01:02:26.000 He said a joke about Melania. 1.00
01:02:28.000 He made his own mock White House press correspondence dinner.
01:02:31.000 And he said Melania has the glow of a woman who's recently widowed.
01:02:31.000 Right.
01:02:35.000 Okay.
01:02:36.000 That's it.
01:02:37.000 It's an old guy joke. 0.80
01:02:38.000 Like he's going to die.
01:02:39.000 Yeah. 0.67
01:02:39.000 It could be, or an assassination joke if you want to take it that way, but he is old. 0.67
01:02:43.000 Wait, is that after the attempt?
01:02:45.000 No, before.
01:02:46.000 So it's on Thursday, and this is Carolla's point.
01:02:48.000 It's a really good point. 0.99
01:02:49.000 He said no one gave a shit on Friday. 0.98
01:02:51.000 It came out on Thursday. 0.99
01:02:52.000 No one cared on Friday.
01:02:53.000 No one cared on Saturday until Saturday night when the assassination attempt.
01:02:57.000 And then all of a sudden, everyone's blaming Kimmel. 1.00
01:02:58.000 It's so funny that the right wing turned into the same fucking pussy faggots that the left wing are. 1.00
01:03:03.000 It's the same shit. 1.00
01:03:05.000 It is the same shit. 1.00
01:03:05.000 It's human behavior patterns. 1.00
01:03:07.000 You could call them left or right.
01:03:09.000 I mean, this is why the left supports war in Ukraine.
01:03:13.000 It's like why the left supports censorship.
01:03:15.000 It's like the same patterns.
01:03:17.000 It's control, control, and power.
01:03:19.000 You want your side to win.
01:03:20.000 That's where they found the note.
01:03:20.000 Yeah, 100%.
01:03:22.000 Nicholas Tartaglia found it.
01:03:22.000 Where?
01:03:25.000 Ah.
01:03:25.000 Who's that?
01:03:26.000 The guy who killed him. 1.00
01:03:27.000 The fucking super jacked contract killer cellmate that he had. 1.00
01:03:32.000 You know that story? 1.00
01:03:33.000 No, his cellmate was a fucking Super Jack cop who killed drug dealers. 1.00
01:03:33.000 Uh-uh. 1.00
01:03:37.000 No.
01:03:38.000 Yeah, dude, he was a gorilla. 1.00
01:03:39.000 I mean, fuck, show Ari a picture of the guy. 1.00
01:03:42.000 Tartaglione is this fucking huge, evil, corrupt cop. 1.00
01:03:46.000 Yeah, super Guinea. 1.00
01:03:47.000 He's like a roided up Guinea. 1.00
01:03:49.000 Damn. 1.00
01:03:50.000 Get an image of this. 0.99
01:03:51.000 I'd like to see this cat.
01:03:52.000 Look at this.
01:03:54.000 Whoa, bro. 1.00
01:03:55.000 Imagine that guy's your fucking cellmate. 1.00
01:03:56.000 Jesus. 1.00
01:03:57.000 And he's killed four guys, four drug dealers and contract killers.
01:04:01.000 What's he in jail for?
01:04:02.000 Murder.
01:04:03.000 Quadruple slaying.
01:04:03.000 Oh.
01:04:04.000 He was in there for fucking dogs. 1.00
01:04:06.000 No. 1.00
01:04:07.000 No, there's a lot of dogs.
01:04:08.000 Look at the picture.
01:04:10.000 Dogs are on his buddies.
01:04:11.000 Cute little dog.
01:04:11.000 Cute dogs.
01:04:12.000 He's a pretty good dog.
01:04:14.000 He's a pretty good dog. 1.00
01:04:16.000 He's fucking murdering people. 1.00
01:04:17.000 And then they put him in the cell with Epstein. 1.00
01:04:20.000 And then he said Epstein tried to kill him 18 days before he died.
01:04:23.000 He complained, excuse me, he said Tartaglioni tried to kill Epstein.
01:04:28.000 The cellmate tried to kill him.
01:04:28.000 Epstein complained.
01:04:29.000 Yeah.
01:04:30.000 We tried to strangle him to death. 0.69
01:04:32.000 Whoa.
01:04:33.000 And they found him unconscious and unresponsive.
01:04:35.000 And then he grabbed McGraw to break out of it.
01:04:40.000 Whatever they do.
01:04:44.000 Crowd MAGA hat.
01:04:48.000 That whole Epstein thing is so crazy.
01:04:50.000 No one's gone to jail for that.
01:04:51.000 It's pretty surprising that they're still not releasing it.
01:04:53.000 Here's what's crazy No arrests.
01:04:56.000 No one's being brought in.
01:04:59.000 Meanwhile, Comey is getting arrested for a photo of seashells that say 8647.
01:05:04.000 He's getting arrested for that?
01:05:05.000 Yeah.
01:05:06.000 What's 8647? 0.79
01:05:08.000 86, get rid of. 0.99
01:05:11.000 But you could say kill.
01:05:13.000 But 86 is, if you get fired, what happened to Mike?
01:05:15.000 He got 86th.
01:05:16.000 Right.
01:05:17.000 It doesn't mean you got killed.
01:05:18.000 But this is a crazy thing to arrest someone for.
01:05:21.000 Of course.
01:05:21.000 FBI arrested in Virginia.
01:05:24.000 Appears briefly in court.
01:05:25.000 Well, they already had it out for him.
01:05:27.000 I know.
01:05:27.000 They're just looking for any excuse.
01:05:30.000 The problem with these guys is it sets a crazy precedent.
01:05:34.000 Yeah, you're down to see Josh Jones's precedent.
01:05:37.000 That's already, that's the worst.
01:05:39.000 Like, that's crazy.
01:05:40.000 That's the crazy one.
01:05:41.000 Well, you went after me?
01:05:41.000 FBI arrest.
01:05:42.000 Well, now we're going after you.
01:05:44.000 For nothing.
01:05:44.000 It doesn't matter.
01:05:45.000 It's nuts.
01:05:45.000 It's nuts.
01:05:46.000 Like, you're going after someone for something that's just silly.
01:05:48.000 It's awesome.
01:05:49.000 8647 is get rid of 47.
01:05:52.000 It's free speech.
01:05:52.000 Right.
01:05:53.000 But it's just like arresting a guy for that is nuts.
01:05:57.000 Comey, don't play that.
01:05:58.000 Yeah.
01:05:58.000 I mean, it's one thing, like, if you have, like, a photo of him, like, an AI, you post an AI photo of him dead, you know, with bullet holes in him, like, wouldn't that be nice?
01:06:08.000 Yeah, yes, but also.
01:06:09.000 But even that.
01:06:10.000 Even that's okay.
01:06:11.000 Yeah.
01:06:12.000 Well, the Secret Service would be nice.
01:06:13.000 Not as an FBI director.
01:06:14.000 Right.
01:06:15.000 But he's a former FBI director, so he's a private citizen at that point.
01:06:18.000 He'd already left the office.
01:06:20.000 Oh.
01:06:20.000 It's crazy.
01:06:21.000 Trump could take a shot, but not a joke.
01:06:23.000 It's just retaliation for going after Trump?
01:06:25.000 Well, it is, but it's like they're just looking for any reason.
01:06:29.000 It just doesn't seem like there should be other reasons.
01:06:32.000 Like if the guy really was dirty, you should have something on him other than this seashell picture.
01:06:36.000 Yeah, it's not.
01:06:36.000 He's not.
01:06:37.000 He just hates him and he's using that.
01:06:39.000 I know, but it sets such a press.
01:06:40.000 Such abuse as that.
01:06:41.000 This was my thing when people weren't upset about ICE people in the street with masks on and no identification.
01:06:46.000 I'm like, this sets a crazy press. 1.00
01:06:48.000 Yeah, I understand you want the undocumented criminals out of the country. 1.00
01:06:52.000 I agree. 1.00
01:06:53.000 However, you're setting a precedent for militarized people with seven weeks training to be walking around with fucking weapons of war and flak jackets with no ID and masks on. 0.98
01:07:05.000 That's all I'm saying. 0.99
01:07:06.000 Like, this is a slippery fucking slope you're going down. 0.99
01:07:09.000 Yeah, it's no bueno. 0.98
01:07:10.000 But then also, they wouldn't have to be there like that if there wasn't any conflict if it wasn't organized, paid for protests. 0.98
01:07:17.000 They paid people to protest, they paid people because they had the fucking, all that fraud in Minnesota. 0.96
01:07:23.000 Yeah, but there's a reason why I was in Minneapolis, why the fucking protests were strongest in Minneapolis and organized, because that's where all the fraud was. 0.99
01:07:31.000 That's where all the people were getting caught. 0.93
01:07:32.000 So they said, well, let's defuse this.
01:07:34.000 And Mike Benz said.
01:07:36.000 But it's not, you don't just give Randos guns and go, all right, they overstepped.
01:07:40.000 So here, you're seven weeks training.
01:07:41.000 Go ahead.
01:07:42.000 Go national security.
01:07:42.000 Not just give Randos guns.
01:07:43.000 They gave him a $50,000 signing bonus.
01:07:46.000 Oh, yeah.
01:07:47.000 You get a $50,000 signing bonus.
01:07:50.000 And by the way, a lot of them are Mexican.
01:07:52.000 A lot of them are Mexican.
01:07:54.000 That's true. 1.00
01:07:55.000 And tuning to two guys that shot that dude in Minneapolis, both Mexicans. 0.98
01:07:59.000 Gotta make my note. 0.83
01:08:00.000 Gotta make my note.
01:08:00.000 Excuse me.
01:08:01.000 Hispanic.
01:08:02.000 Sure.
01:08:02.000 Latino.
01:08:03.000 Had Latin names.
01:08:04.000 Oh, interesting.
01:08:05.000 I was at the airport in Philly, and an ICE agent was like, Yo, my man, what's up?
01:08:09.000 And I was like, Yo, chill.
01:08:11.000 Chill. 1.00
01:08:13.000 Fuck. 1.00
01:08:13.000 Don't ask me for a picture. 1.00
01:08:14.000 Do you see that Trump renamed it instead of ICE?
01:08:16.000 Now it's NICE.
01:08:17.000 I saw that.
01:08:18.000 What?
01:08:19.000 It's NICE now instead of ICE.
01:08:21.000 So now you're protesting NICE.
01:08:22.000 It's national.
01:08:24.000 Immigrations, customs, enforcement.
01:08:26.000 He's done it again.
01:08:27.000 Never mind.
01:08:28.000 Man, our leader.
01:08:31.000 That's funny.
01:08:31.000 He's a wild boy.
01:08:32.000 Still funny.
01:08:33.000 It is funny.
01:08:34.000 Calling it nice.
01:08:35.000 Is your thing about to go off?
01:08:36.000 Is that why you stop it? 1.00
01:08:37.000 I just realized I left my kid in a Somali daycare. 1.00
01:08:39.000 I've got to go pick him up. 1.00
01:08:41.000 He'll be fine.
01:08:42.000 Why did he be nice while I was gone?
01:08:43.000 Did they go nuts?
01:08:44.000 No. 0.91
01:08:45.000 Yeah, they shot him.
01:08:46.000 You don't know about Alex Freddy?
01:08:46.000 They shot him.
01:08:47.000 I executed two citizens. 0.89
01:08:47.000 No X Freddy. 0.89
01:08:48.000 Good for you.
01:08:49.000 Boy, you've been gone, huh? 0.97
01:08:51.000 Killed two citizens?
01:08:52.000 Well, there's one lady that got killed in a car because they were trying to tell her to stay. 1.00
01:08:58.000 She was protesting and fucking with them. 0.99
01:09:00.000 And then she drove when the cop tried to step in front of her car. 0.99
01:09:04.000 She's clearly turning her wheel away from him.
01:09:07.000 She's not trying to run him over.
01:09:08.000 And he just talked to her.
01:09:09.000 Who, a cop or ice?
01:09:10.000 Ice guy. 1.00
01:09:11.000 And he said, fucking, an American born citizen? 1.00
01:09:11.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:09:14.000 Oh, yeah.
01:09:14.000 Yeah.
01:09:15.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:09:16.000 A crazy lady. 1.00
01:09:17.000 Kind of anyone, but yes. 0.81
01:09:18.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:09:19.000 Lesbian. 1.00
01:09:20.000 Allegedly. 1.00
01:09:21.000 Yeah, I mean, yeah. 0.98
01:09:22.000 Well, the girlfriend was there.
01:09:23.000 Do you believe in them, though, for real?
01:09:25.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
01:09:25.000 She looked like a lesbian. 1.00
01:09:28.000 You don't think? 1.00
01:09:29.000 No, they seemed legit.
01:09:30.000 Yeah.
01:09:30.000 She had a kid.
01:09:31.000 She looked like Brock Lesnar.
01:09:32.000 She's a. 1.00
01:09:34.000 Newly lesbian lady. 1.00
01:09:35.000 Okay. 1.00
01:09:36.000 Newly lesbian.
01:09:37.000 What was the backlash on that? 1.00
01:09:38.000 It was pretty bad.
01:09:39.000 It was pretty bad.
01:09:40.000 Yeah, pretty bad backlash.
01:09:41.000 And then this Alex Pretty guy.
01:09:44.000 Did they blame it on those?
01:09:45.000 Did they manage that one?
01:09:47.000 The Alex Pretty guy was carrying a gun.
01:09:49.000 And so he was open carrying or concealed carrying and physically pushing cops.
01:09:56.000 It was kind of crazy.
01:09:57.000 And then they tackle him.
01:09:58.000 They found out he's a gun.
01:09:59.000 This is where it gets crazy.
01:10:00.000 One of the Border Protection's agents grabs the gun and is taking it away.
01:10:04.000 And unfortunately, the gun accidentally goes off.
01:10:07.000 The gun that he was carrying is called a SIG P320 and it's notorious for accidental discharges.
01:10:14.000 So, this is confusing because it's hard to tell because the video is a little grainy, but most people who are experts look at it and say that, at least the videos that I've watched, say that that gun accidentally went off without the guy touching the trigger.
01:10:28.000 But also, the cop has the gun.
01:10:30.000 The cop's moving away with the gun.
01:10:32.000 They say he has a gun.
01:10:33.000 Cop or the ICE people?
01:10:34.000 The cops say it's Border Protections.
01:10:37.000 It's not even ICE, it's a different organization.
01:10:40.000 So, the Border Protections guys.
01:10:42.000 Are moving away with the gun.
01:10:44.000 The gun goes off, and these guys think the guy has another gun, and then they start shooting him. 0.98
01:10:49.000 And they shoot him and kill him while they have him down.
01:10:51.000 It's a rough video. 0.67
01:10:52.000 This is all my interpretation based on videos.
01:10:55.000 I might not be accurate, but I've seen the video.
01:10:58.000 It does look like the slide moves.
01:11:00.000 It does look like the sound of a gun going off corresponds with that slide moving.
01:11:04.000 And that gun is notorious.
01:11:06.000 Like, if you look up SIG P320 online, accidental discharge, you'll see tons of videos of these guns accidentally go off.
01:11:13.000 Accidental discharge?
01:11:16.000 I haven't had one of those in a long time.
01:11:18.000 I used to have the one on my kids.
01:11:19.000 Wet dreams?
01:11:20.000 Not a long time.
01:11:20.000 Wet dreams.
01:11:21.000 You wake up to it, really.
01:11:22.000 No, been there. 0.99
01:11:24.000 That's like accidental fucking SIG. 0.98
01:11:26.000 Sorry. 1.00
01:11:27.000 That's bullshit. 0.99
01:11:29.000 Let's talk for 20 minutes. 1.00
01:11:30.000 We'll get back to it in a second.
01:11:34.000 Yeah, so you missed all the fun.
01:11:36.000 Good for you.
01:11:37.000 But it's like the only reason why there were violent people in the streets protesting is because it was an organized, paid-for protest.
01:11:43.000 They actually physically paid people to be there and protest, they gave them signs.
01:11:47.000 How do you get on that list to get paid for that?
01:11:49.000 You had to get on some wacky left-wing newsletter.
01:11:52.000 I don't know.
01:11:53.000 Still, like.
01:11:55.000 Yeah, you don't just put random people in charge of people.
01:11:57.000 I mean, you do have to get rid of all the cartel members and all the criminals that came across the border.
01:12:02.000 I mean, they let more than 10 million people into the country over four years.
01:12:06.000 Americans have a great way of overreacting to stuff.
01:12:09.000 They're like, oh, Saddam Hussein's a problem. 1.00
01:12:10.000 Let's go in there and kill a million people. 1.00
01:12:12.000 Yeah, America does that. 1.00
01:12:13.000 Yeah.
01:12:14.000 We're not the best people to handle stuff, and we're still like, we should handle it.
01:12:17.000 You know who else does that?
01:12:18.000 Who? 0.90
01:12:19.000 Israel. 0.76
01:12:20.000 Blame everything on Israel.
01:12:22.000 I'm not blaming everything.
01:12:24.000 Yeah.
01:12:25.000 They're a part of it.
01:12:26.000 It is amazing how many high profile Jewish people just have an opinion about everything. 1.00
01:12:32.000 But when it gets to this, they just avoid that or come up with some random way to justify annihilating an entire city. 1.00
01:12:44.000 Yeah.
01:12:44.000 It's just funny to me when Americans are like, hey, this other country's overstepping.
01:12:49.000 Yeah, we bombed the band twice.
01:12:51.000 Yeah, we were pretty far.
01:12:52.000 Afghanistan, Iraq. 1.00
01:12:53.000 Those fuckers had it really come to that. 1.00
01:12:56.000 Twice? 1.00
01:12:56.000 They were Jews. 1.00
01:12:57.000 The second one was just going, hey, check this out, Russia. 1.00
01:13:01.000 I guess so.
01:13:02.000 But yeah, whatever.
01:13:04.000 Well, that was a long time ago.
01:13:05.000 That's true.
01:13:06.000 Everybody did that's dead.
01:13:07.000 But based on today, ui.
01:13:10.000 Ui ve.
01:13:11.000 Ui ve. 1.00
01:13:12.000 It's a lot like Lebanon, bro. 1.00
01:13:14.000 What they're doing in Lebanon right now is crazy. 1.00
01:13:15.000 Well, they're looking for Hezbollah. 0.97
01:13:17.000 They've got to look under rubble. 0.90
01:13:19.000 Mmm, Barney rubble.
01:13:21.000 One more time with that later there.
01:13:24.000 What else is there?
01:13:26.000 Thank you.
01:13:27.000 There we go.
01:13:29.000 It's a wild time to be alive, kids.
01:13:30.000 It's wild.
01:13:31.000 But at least we're going to have drugs soon.
01:13:33.000 That's pretty nice.
01:13:33.000 Well, at least all those people that are hooked on pills are going to get off of them.
01:13:37.000 A lot of them are, at least.
01:13:38.000 It's going to at least give them something that works.
01:13:41.000 How come we can't get free health care?
01:13:43.000 Yeah, right? 0.51
01:13:44.000 Why don't we do that? 0.99
01:13:45.000 I'm paying out the ass. 0.99
01:13:46.000 Why can't we do that? 0.99
01:13:47.000 I bet if they took all the money from fraud, it would pay for health care 10 times lower.
01:13:51.000 Or in Ukraine or Israel.
01:13:52.000 Oh, yeah.
01:13:53.000 Why not?
01:13:53.000 Right.
01:13:54.000 Well, that's what's annoying.
01:13:55.000 All these policies are like if we get this much money, we can cure this.
01:13:58.000 What are you doing?
01:13:58.000 I have all this money.
01:13:59.000 I think.
01:14:00.000 100% free healthcare would be an awesome thing.
01:14:03.000 But you also want doctors to be incentivized to be really good at their jobs. 0.60
01:14:07.000 For sure.
01:14:08.000 So you want, like, the guy that did your knee and did my knee?
01:14:12.000 That's a bad thing.
01:14:13.000 Why can't we have universal healthcare and private doctors? 0.69
01:14:16.000 We should be able to have both of those things. 0.96
01:14:18.000 Like public school and private school.
01:14:19.000 Right.
01:14:20.000 Public defenders.
01:14:20.000 You're allowed to have a public defender.
01:14:22.000 Dude, the ease at which I got treated in third world countries was like really.
01:14:26.000 You just go in, see somebody, like, here's your pills you need, here's your drops you need.
01:14:26.000 Yeah.
01:14:31.000 Isn't it dirty deals and weird equipment over there?
01:14:34.000 No.
01:14:34.000 No.
01:14:35.000 Harvard trained doctors.
01:14:35.000 Really?
01:14:36.000 Come on.
01:14:37.000 Yeah, there's just no upsell for it.
01:14:39.000 Universal health care system in America would cost approximately 3.0 to 3.2 trillion annually.
01:14:45.000 Oh.
01:14:45.000 That's a lot.
01:14:46.000 Which is actually less than the current system that costs around 5.3 trillion per year.
01:14:49.000 Wow.
01:14:50.000 You're talking about a savings of almost 50%.
01:14:54.000 Why don't we get free health care?
01:14:56.000 So, a savings of $450 billion annually while providing coverage to all Americans.
01:15:01.000 According to Perplexity, our AI sponsor, which is never wrong, the United States currently spends about $5.3 trillion in health care, $15,474 per person as of 2024.
01:15:13.000 Even when something goes wrong and you have insurance, it's not paid for.
01:15:17.000 You've got to spend $5,000 to get anesthesia and then another $5,000 to go downstairs for the surgery.
01:15:23.000 What do you think is the problem?
01:15:24.000 What is it?
01:15:25.000 What is causing the charge?
01:15:26.000 I would imagine they want the money.
01:15:27.000 It's an insurance company trying to make you president.
01:15:29.000 Oh, thanks.
01:15:30.000 It's an insurance company.
01:15:31.000 Imagine you're president. 1.00
01:15:32.000 I've never read a Jew. 0.88
01:15:33.000 I got my teeth checked in Ecuador and they were like, You haven't packed the gums. 0.95
01:15:37.000 I was like, All right, I was about to go home in a week.
01:15:38.000 I was like, When I go home, I'll fix it. 0.97
01:15:40.000 And they're like, Are you nuts?
01:15:42.000 People fly here to get that surgery because it's so much cheaper. 0.96
01:15:42.000 Do it. 0.96
01:15:46.000 Flight, hotels, all that is much cheaper than doing it there.
01:15:50.000 Yeah.
01:15:50.000 And they're like, We have a surgeon.
01:15:51.000 And I was like, Is he like trained?
01:15:53.000 And they're like, Yeah, he went to Yale Medical School.
01:15:55.000 Dude shows up, sacrifices a chicken.
01:15:57.000 Yeah, exactly. 0.99
01:15:58.000 Al-Shabaab.
01:15:59.000 Al-Shabaab.
01:15:59.000 Well, this is why they clipped Bernie because he was trying to do this, so they got rid of him.
01:16:04.000 That was one thing he was trying to do.
01:16:05.000 It kind of blows.
01:16:06.000 It's embarrassing.
01:16:07.000 All right, let's put it this way.
01:16:08.000 How much would it cost if school, like higher education, was free?
01:16:14.000 Oh, that's too much money in that.
01:16:15.000 They won't do it.
01:16:16.000 Well, that's the same exact thing with health care.
01:16:18.000 Yeah.
01:16:18.000 Yeah.
01:16:19.000 It's a fortune.
01:16:20.000 We're making it worse.
01:16:21.000 As a country, it's all.
01:16:22.000 And it's gone up.
01:16:23.000 It's the same reason we're doing wars.
01:16:24.000 Yeah.
01:16:25.000 Money?
01:16:25.000 Just to make money.
01:16:26.000 The oil?
01:16:26.000 Of course.
01:16:27.000 Nothing else.
01:16:27.000 Not even just oil, but defense contracts.
01:16:29.000 They need.
01:16:30.000 They're raking it in.
01:16:32.000 I thought it was just.
01:16:33.000 I mean, the war has already cost how much?
01:16:35.000 Let's find out that.
01:16:36.000 How much is the war?
01:16:37.000 Globally, how much is the war?
01:16:37.000 Let's just say.
01:16:38.000 No, no, no. 0.97
01:16:39.000 Let's just look at how much Iran has cost us. 0.98
01:16:41.000 There we go. 0.99
01:16:42.000 That's what I mean.
01:16:42.000 Wait, shake a guess.
01:16:43.000 Let's do best. 1.00
01:16:43.000 Shutting down the fucking system. 1.00
01:16:44.000 How about Ukraine? 1.00
01:16:45.000 But I mean, just us spending money to bomb Iran. 0.98
01:16:45.000 Right. 0.98
01:16:49.000 Just that.
01:16:50.000 Just the bombs?
01:16:50.000 The simplest.
01:16:51.000 Lowest run without the economic impact, the oil impact.
01:16:54.000 What about the Hormuz and all that?
01:16:56.000 Well, that's a factor.
01:16:58.000 But let's just find out how much the raw money spent on the bombs.
01:17:01.000 $25 billion.
01:17:02.000 $25 billion.
01:17:04.000 That's dropping the bucket.
01:17:05.000 60 days into the war.
01:17:06.000 How much is Ukraine?
01:17:07.000 That's a lot more. 0.98
01:17:09.000 So, what concerns me, not just, well, all of it concerns me, one of the things that someone told me was that we've kind of depleted our weapon supplies because we don't have that many of those fucking missiles. 0.97
01:17:20.000 We've spent so much. 0.97
01:17:21.000 Well, we gave them all to Ukraine, we gave them all to Israel, and then we gave them all, now we're fucking using them. 1.00
01:17:26.000 That Zelensky's a mooch. 1.00
01:17:28.000 He just keeps wanting more every time. 1.00
01:17:31.000 Oh, you think it's his?
01:17:32.000 No, I think it's.
01:17:33.000 Out of Sanya?
01:17:34.000 It's us.
01:17:35.000 It's the US.
01:17:36.000 It's money, but it's all together.
01:17:39.000 It's all a big scam, Ponzi scheme.
01:17:41.000 Everybody's making money.
01:17:42.000 You should get Trump on here.
01:17:45.000 We're doing great.
01:17:46.000 Don't let anybody lie to you.
01:17:50.000 Maybe next time we schmooze them into free health care.
01:17:52.000 Maybe next time we schmooze them into a Protect Our Parks.
01:17:54.000 Yeah, the guys are dropping in here.
01:17:56.000 Just some free health care.
01:17:57.000 Come on, dog.
01:17:59.000 It's crazy, too, because there was a pill I had to get, like three of.
01:18:02.000 When I went to Asia or something, and it was like, I got two here, and they cost me like $400 each.
01:18:06.000 And then the same, it's the same drug.
01:18:08.000 In Myanmar, it's like $40.
01:18:09.000 Well, that's one thing that he has fixed.
01:18:11.000 One thing that Trump is working on is making whatever the low price is internationally, the price that people pay in America. 0.96
01:18:18.000 And he told, he's fucking hilarious. 0.93
01:18:20.000 He was telling a story. 0.92
01:18:20.000 I've got a friend, I don't want to say his name, very successful. 0.92
01:18:24.000 He's a big guy.
01:18:25.000 He took the fat pill, it didn't work.
01:18:29.000 But he was going on about how his friend went overseas, he forgot his fat pill.
01:18:33.000 He went overseas and he was in Europe and he got it for like 100 bucks.
01:18:37.000 Yeah.
01:18:37.000 And he's like, this is like $1,300 in America.
01:18:40.000 It's not right.
01:18:40.000 It's crazy.
01:18:41.000 It's not right.
01:18:42.000 And so he made it so that whatever the low cost is in these other countries, that's the low cost in America.
01:18:48.000 That's what it costs here now.
01:18:49.000 Is that right?
01:18:49.000 That's good.
01:18:49.000 Yes.
01:18:50.000 Everybody's on it.
01:18:51.000 It's like you're not going to get all good.
01:18:53.000 Any drug.
01:18:54.000 You're not going to get all good with any president either. 1.00
01:18:57.000 You're going to get a lot of bad shit because all these people are surrounded by demons. 1.00
01:19:01.000 They're surrounded by war hawks and demons and defense contractors and scam artists in the pharmaceutical industry. 1.00
01:19:08.000 There's all these fucking people that are trying to make sure that they can make the most amount of money possible. 1.00
01:19:13.000 Just all coke snorting demons, allegedly. 1.00
01:19:16.000 I was watching this documentary on the homeless here in Austin, and they're talking about how I was on schizophrenia medicine.
01:19:23.000 I can't afford it anymore.
01:19:25.000 And they're out there just sprinting around.
01:19:27.000 What happens if you take schizophrenia medicine and you don't have schizophrenia? 1.00
01:19:31.000 Ooh, that's a fucking lie. 1.00
01:19:32.000 I think I did that. 1.00
01:19:33.000 A couple shots.
01:19:34.000 I think I took some antipsychotics and slept for four days.
01:19:38.000 Huge mistake.
01:19:40.000 It helps you. 1.00
01:19:40.000 I think it's a fucking antipsychotic. 1.00
01:19:42.000 He was like, here, take this. 1.00
01:19:44.000 Does he take it?
01:19:45.000 I don't know if he takes it.
01:19:46.000 It was expired, so I guess not.
01:19:48.000 Jesus Christ.
01:19:49.000 It helps.
01:19:49.000 Yeah, but expired medication, I was just reading this thing about that.
01:19:51.000 Like, most expired medication is actually still usable, like, up to 300% longer than they say it.
01:19:57.000 Yeah, it's like, A little bit less effective, but still good.
01:20:00.000 Yeah.
01:20:01.000 Yeah, but I don't even know if it's less effective.
01:20:03.000 This thing was saying that it's 100% effective for a long period of time after the expiration date.
01:20:08.000 I don't know why they have an expiration date.
01:20:10.000 It's not like milk.
01:20:11.000 Right.
01:20:11.000 Yeah, the healthcare thing is really embarrassing, to be honest.
01:20:14.000 It's really embarrassing. 0.93
01:20:15.000 Mental institutions and some free healthcare for these fellas.
01:20:17.000 Yeah, silence.
01:20:18.000 I don't know how to.
01:20:19.000 Obviously, no one knows that.
01:20:20.000 Yeah, we got to do something.
01:20:21.000 A giant percentage of those people are addicted to drugs, right?
01:20:22.000 A giant percentage of those people are addicted to drugs, right?
01:20:25.000 A giant percentage of those people are addicted to fentanyl zombies.
01:20:27.000 You need Ibogaine for all those people, mental health.
01:20:30.000 Facilities, you need to get them on whatever medication to fix their schizophrenia, and it's also not even like a goodwill thing, it's also like we need to clean their cars.
01:20:39.000 Self safety, yeah, it's for everybody.
01:20:42.000 So, what are we doing?
01:20:43.000 Why, whatever Skid Row, Los Angeles, holdup Skid Row in Los Angeles is 50 blocks.
01:20:49.000 50 blocks, five zeros.
01:20:52.000 Last time I looked, it said American health care, Americans pay more than two times the next country for health care, and we get the 17th best coverage.
01:21:01.000 And we're the sickest.
01:21:03.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:21:03.000 We're the sickest. 0.99
01:21:04.000 We spend the most money. 0.99
01:21:04.000 It's nuts. 0.99
01:21:05.000 And we're the sickest. 0.99
01:21:10.000 And we're the sickest. 0.98
01:21:11.000 And Toronto, it was clean.
01:21:13.000 Yeah, you just go right to a doctor.
01:21:17.000 Even just driving around, I was like, this is crazy.
01:21:20.000 How are we getting. 1.00
01:21:24.000 Why is America dumb? 1.00
01:21:26.000 I know. 1.00
01:21:27.000 I know. 1.00
01:21:28.000 And our shit is locked up. 1.00
01:21:31.000 Short, they're gonna watch them now. 1.00
01:21:35.000 I got a lot of them.
01:21:37.000 I'll just do it just for a little bit of a thrill.
01:21:40.000 Can I get the Winona Rider thing?
01:21:42.000 It's cheaper, too.
01:21:43.000 Yeah, it's cheaper.
01:21:44.000 I mean, the last time I saw Mark Steele, we're in a movie theater and I got some popcorn.
01:21:50.000 And it's I'm sure it's closed by now.
01:21:52.000 And then the lady turned around and got my popcorn.
01:21:54.000 And then he just had beef jerky in the movie.
01:21:57.000 Yeah, they were selling it.
01:21:58.000 How'd you get that?
01:21:59.000 I guess most expensive item.
01:22:00.000 I just reached for it.
01:22:01.000 Yeah, oh boy, they up the prices.
01:22:05.000 I mean, you get a Hudson News cliff bar.
01:22:07.000 It's eight bucks.
01:22:08.000 Not on my watch. 0.97
01:22:09.000 It's ridiculous. 0.95
01:22:10.000 Not on my watch. 0.97
01:22:11.000 Once you're on the plane, you're home free, you know?
01:22:12.000 You're raising the cost for the rest of us.
01:22:14.000 Yeah, you are.
01:22:15.000 That's why I take buying cliff bars.
01:22:17.000 They put that in.
01:22:18.000 They factor the theft in.
01:22:19.000 You're a successful person.
01:22:21.000 That's outrageous.
01:22:22.000 Habits die hard.
01:22:23.000 Yeah, you don't.
01:22:24.000 I steal fish.
01:22:24.000 No one's going to be sympathetic towards you.
01:22:25.000 You have money.
01:22:26.000 I'm not asking you to.
01:22:27.000 I'm just saying it to them.
01:22:28.000 It's a fun ride.
01:22:29.000 I don't want it.
01:22:31.000 The beef jerky tastes better when it's stolen?
01:22:33.000 Easily.
01:22:33.000 Everything tastes better when it's stolen.
01:22:35.000 It's so weird.
01:22:36.000 Diaz, one time at the airport, he just comes off from one of those.
01:22:39.000 Bodegas and he comes on, he just shows me Tic Tacs.
01:22:41.000 And I was like, What is that for?
01:22:42.000 He goes, Yeah, right?
01:22:43.000 I got someone else.
01:22:44.000 And they just threw it in the garbage.
01:22:46.000 Wow.
01:22:46.000 And I was like, What are you doing?
01:22:47.000 He goes, I'm just trying to stay sharp.
01:22:49.000 That's a ballsy steel because it rattles.
01:22:51.000 That's a hard steel.
01:22:52.000 That's a hard steel.
01:22:53.000 Chest bars quiet.
01:22:53.000 That's right.
01:22:54.000 Sharp is hilarious.
01:22:56.000 Whoop it.
01:22:57.000 I don't throw it out either.
01:22:58.000 I don't throw it out.
01:22:59.000 Yeah.
01:23:00.000 Joey's going in for surgery today. 1.00
01:23:02.000 Tits. 1.00
01:23:02.000 Uh oh. 1.00
01:23:02.000 Nice. 1.00
01:23:03.000 He's getting some.
01:23:04.000 He's getting cannons.
01:23:05.000 He's getting a cannon reduction surgery.
01:23:08.000 He's getting top surgery. 0.99
01:23:10.000 He's getting his tits removed. 0.99
01:23:12.000 He's getting that big scar. 0.99
01:23:14.000 But him shirtless is rough.
01:23:16.000 How many times have you seen it?
01:23:17.000 Just once and it's burned in.
01:23:19.000 I've seen it.
01:23:21.000 It's Joey Karate.
01:23:23.000 Joey Carrady's great. 1.00
01:23:25.000 That fucking guy's such an animal. 1.00
01:23:28.000 He's a fucking guy. 1.00
01:23:29.000 He's got his leg up to about his knee height. 1.00
01:23:31.000 He's pretty good.
01:23:34.000 Is he around?
01:23:35.000 Did he move here yet?
01:23:36.000 No, but he's coming back and forth all the time.
01:23:38.000 Look at that thing.
01:23:38.000 There he is.
01:23:42.000 That looks like AI.
01:23:43.000 That's crazy.
01:23:43.000 Jesus.
01:23:44.000 How's he alive?
01:23:45.000 Without context of a background, it's wild.
01:23:47.000 Wow.
01:23:48.000 That belly is crazy. 1.00
01:23:49.000 You've got to have a decent hog if you're going to have that gut. 0.96
01:23:51.000 He's always got a hell of a hog. 0.93
01:23:52.000 Is he grubbing or boozing? 0.95
01:23:54.000 What is that?
01:23:55.000 Food.
01:23:55.000 He's grubbing.
01:23:56.000 Oh, yeah.
01:23:57.000 Joey can't stop beating.
01:23:58.000 He doesn't really drink.
01:23:59.000 He doesn't drink at all.
01:24:00.000 I go to eat with Joey.
01:24:01.000 It's a scene.
01:24:02.000 It's a fun time.
01:24:03.000 He loves it. 1.00
01:24:03.000 Oh, that poor ghee. 1.00
01:24:04.000 He goes off.
01:24:05.000 He eats. 1.00
01:24:08.000 He fucking loves food. 0.99
01:24:09.000 But he's just. 0.99
01:24:10.000 I've got a new Chinese place by my place. 0.97
01:24:11.000 You've got to come.
01:24:12.000 It's the most fun human. 0.99
01:24:13.000 It sucks. 0.62
01:24:15.000 He's the most fun human that's ever existed. 0.99
01:24:17.000 Yeah.
01:24:18.000 No one's more fun.
01:24:19.000 He's a good egg.
01:24:20.000 He's barely a real person.
01:24:21.000 He's a human cartoon.
01:24:22.000 Barely real.
01:24:23.000 He's so funny.
01:24:24.000 So he's still getting up on stage.
01:24:26.000 He's still doing sets. 0.53
01:24:27.000 Oh, he killed.
01:24:28.000 He killed.
01:24:29.000 He was here.
01:24:29.000 He did an hour.
01:24:31.000 He's got all these great stories.
01:24:32.000 It's really, really good.
01:24:34.000 Really well done.
01:24:35.000 All right.
01:24:36.000 This is the man.
01:24:36.000 Good to have him back.
01:24:39.000 That's the thing about comedy.
01:24:40.000 We're kind of losing the wildness.
01:24:43.000 You know, when I started comedy, it was like Geraldo and all these guys are all dead now.
01:24:47.000 Drugs.
01:24:47.000 I think it's kind of coming back now.
01:24:49.000 It's coming back.
01:24:50.000 I think it's coming back because TV's going away.
01:24:53.000 So it's like it gets down to the root of what is really effective in comedy.
01:24:56.000 Wildness is more effective.
01:24:58.000 It's more effective.
01:24:59.000 Fun. 1.00
01:24:59.000 If you're sitting there drunk in a crowd and some dudes on stage going off saying crazy shit, it's more fun. 1.00
01:25:05.000 Yeah, because you're doing this. 0.98
01:25:06.000 It is more fun, but I don't know if that's actually here. 0.99
01:25:07.000 I think there's a lot of fucking guys with jobs. 0.99
01:25:10.000 Sober, a lot of sobriety. 1.00
01:25:12.000 Got to get up early for a podcast tomorrow.
01:25:14.000 These young guys, though, these young guys aren't like that.
01:25:16.000 A lot of these young guys coming up are doing drugs.
01:25:18.000 They're doing clips.
01:25:19.000 Oh, good.
01:25:20.000 Well, they're doing clips, but they're still wild boys.
01:25:22.000 Some people are still giving it, bringing it.
01:25:24.000 You hope so.
01:25:25.000 Late Night in the Cello used to be so much fun.
01:25:28.000 When Mac he was drinking, when it was just a drinking crowd, it was a lot of whiskey.
01:25:28.000 I know.
01:25:32.000 There's.
01:25:33.000 There's that here.
01:25:34.000 Here.
01:25:35.000 Yeah, here for sure.
01:25:35.000 Here for sure.
01:25:36.000 Like last night.
01:25:37.000 Yeah, last night was tough.
01:25:37.000 We did it last night.
01:25:38.000 Yeah.
01:25:39.000 What I missed?
01:25:39.000 Oh, what happened?
01:25:40.000 We just had a couple drinks.
01:25:42.000 Just some bros and bros.
01:25:43.000 I was begging him to.
01:25:45.000 I've changed my new.
01:25:46.000 He has a new texture.
01:25:47.000 He's like, all right, come on, drink.
01:25:48.000 I'm like, no, I got to get up early tomorrow. 0.98
01:25:49.000 I was like, dude, I'm like, oh, you're going to call me gay and lame. 0.89
01:25:53.000 Bro, I've been gone. 0.86
01:25:54.000 I've had time to ruminate on this.
01:25:55.000 You can peer.
01:25:56.000 And then you can peer with the other guy.
01:25:57.000 Yeah, I got a new peer pressure.
01:25:58.000 No, I'm just saying, like, I want to drink and I want to be alone.
01:25:58.000 Yeah, you got a new one.
01:26:01.000 If you were a friend, I was like, tomorrow's going to be tough for me.
01:26:06.000 I'd like it to be tough for somebody else.
01:26:08.000 Do me a favor. 1.00
01:26:09.000 Chug that fucking drink. 1.00
01:26:10.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:26:12.000 Pier one.
01:26:12.000 He always comes in.
01:26:13.000 He has no idea what your count is.
01:26:15.000 He just comes in.
01:26:16.000 I'm like, I could have done one or seven and you would have no clue.
01:26:16.000 He goes, You could do more.
01:26:19.000 DeRose.
01:26:20.000 He's like, You got to go more.
01:26:21.000 DeRose is up there.
01:26:22.000 DeRose is the worst.
01:26:22.000 He's the number one.
01:26:25.000 He's the number one.
01:26:26.000 He's my birthday month.
01:26:27.000 Yes.
01:26:27.000 Yes.
01:26:27.000 He's like a chick.
01:26:28.000 He's the biggest pig in comedy. 1.00
01:26:30.000 He's a pig, dude. 1.00
01:26:30.000 He is. 1.00
01:26:31.000 I hate him. 1.00
01:26:32.000 He'll pour shots in your mouth. 1.00
01:26:34.000 He'll tilt your hand. 0.98
01:26:34.000 He doesn't care. 0.98
01:26:35.000 He'll also go, Come on, don't be a pussy. 1.00
01:26:37.000 You do a shot and then you do, and then. 1.00
01:26:39.000 10 minutes later, he's gone and he's at KFC. 0.98
01:26:44.000 He's so funny how he shits on weed people, too. 0.99
01:26:46.000 I know. 0.99
01:26:47.000 He hates weed.
01:26:48.000 It's so weird.
01:26:49.000 I like his classic drinker.
01:26:51.000 I'm with him, dude.
01:26:52.000 He's a classic drinker.
01:26:53.000 I think he was just around a lot of all the New York comics got sober and then just smoked weed constantly.
01:26:58.000 Got bored.
01:26:59.000 And then they're like, oh, you're drinking again? 0.99
01:27:01.000 It's like, dude, you haven't had a thought in fucking seven years. 0.99
01:27:04.000 What are you talking to? 1.00
01:27:06.000 It's all munchies. 1.00
01:27:09.000 I mean, everything can be abused. 1.00
01:27:11.000 There's only a couple people in comedy that do weed like real good, like Soder, Soder, Jay.
01:27:16.000 Sure.
01:27:16.000 Where they're like, they're just the same.
01:27:18.000 Go on, man.
01:27:18.000 They're just happy.
01:27:19.000 Chappelle.
01:27:20.000 Spell.
01:27:21.000 Because, yes, most people go in on weed.
01:27:23.000 Freeze low.
01:27:23.000 They still are out and fun.
01:27:25.000 Right.
01:27:25.000 It's a personality thing.
01:27:27.000 They're still active.
01:27:27.000 Totally.
01:27:29.000 It's also, I think, a biological thing because I think it affects people very differently.
01:27:29.000 Yeah, most people.
01:27:33.000 Definitely.
01:27:34.000 Can you get high when you smoke?
01:27:35.000 Yeah, Jamie gets high when he smokes.
01:27:37.000 Okay, cool.
01:27:37.000 Edibles just don't work on the kid.
01:27:38.000 Wow.
01:27:39.000 That's wild.
01:27:40.000 Young Jamie shrugs him off.
01:27:41.000 That's crazy.
01:27:42.000 You try to dose him up, he'll smile right in your face.
01:27:44.000 Jamie, I'd like you to have a brewsky.
01:27:46.000 What's going on?
01:27:46.000 It'd be nice.
01:27:47.000 Give it, Mark.
01:27:48.000 We talked about this earlier, and I'd love for you to get involved.
01:27:51.000 You talked at me.
01:27:51.000 I didn't really.
01:27:53.000 Uh oh.
01:27:54.000 Put on the beer.
01:27:55.000 Put on the beer.
01:27:55.000 All of a sudden, I'm talking.
01:27:56.000 Well, it worked.
01:27:57.000 He's drinking.
01:27:57.000 Yeah.
01:28:00.000 It works.
01:28:00.000 He said something nasty, and that's fine.
01:28:02.000 I'm not going to give you for that.
01:28:03.000 He said, You talked at me.
01:28:05.000 I'm trying to include you and have it.
01:28:06.000 Let's have fun. 1.00
01:28:07.000 JMo's a sassy bitch. 1.00
01:28:08.000 He's just being, just clarifying. 1.00
01:28:10.000 He's an assassin.
01:28:11.000 I didn't talk at you. 0.88
01:28:11.000 He talked at me. 0.88
01:28:12.000 How did I talk at you?
01:28:13.000 Well, you said it was a discussion.
01:28:14.000 I mean, it was one of those.
01:28:15.000 Yeah, a little discussion.
01:28:16.000 And then I said, Let's go watch Sixers Celtics.
01:28:18.000 Let's have a couple beers.
01:28:18.000 I thought it was a great night.
01:28:19.000 Go to a bar and watch the Celtics.
01:28:21.000 Sixers.
01:28:23.000 Yeah.
01:28:23.000 Peer pressure.
01:28:24.000 Fun times.
01:28:25.000 You can upload it with four beers or something.
01:28:28.000 You're Piers Morgan.
01:28:30.000 Yeah, leave it till Monday.
01:28:31.000 We don't care.
01:28:32.000 When do you get in that car?
01:28:34.000 Tomorrow.
01:28:35.000 A tree fell on his car.
01:28:37.000 I crashed my car.
01:28:37.000 I know.
01:28:38.000 From what?
01:28:38.000 Really?
01:28:39.000 The winds here? 0.99
01:28:40.000 They were doing some fucking road work right in front of my house and the vibrations. 0.98
01:28:45.000 They're building Savage or Cross? 0.99
01:28:48.000 You got second towered?
01:28:50.000 I really did.
01:28:50.000 Wow.
01:28:53.000 The house I live in, I'm renting this house.
01:28:54.000 It's like one of those new. 0.99
01:28:57.000 Prefab, fucking, or whatever those things are. 0.99
01:28:58.000 These new Austin houses, which are all the exact same, which I kind of don't fucking like at all. 0.99
01:29:03.000 Is it the same one you've been in? 0.86
01:29:05.000 It's like a 15 foot ceiling for no reason.
01:29:05.000 Yeah.
01:29:07.000 It's one floor.
01:29:08.000 Elkhouse.
01:29:09.000 It has this type of wall.
01:29:11.000 It's like standard.
01:29:12.000 It's a beautiful house.
01:29:14.000 It is very nice. 0.99
01:29:14.000 And the last house I was in was a fucking Queens apartment. 0.99
01:29:18.000 Right. 0.99
01:29:19.000 That had more soul than this place.
01:29:21.000 More soul for sure. 1.00
01:29:22.000 But when I first walked into the house I'm in now, I was like, holy fuck. 0.99
01:29:26.000 This is incredible. 0.99
01:29:27.000 Yeah.
01:29:27.000 Yeah.
01:29:28.000 Now it's just not a fucking piece of shit. 1.00
01:29:31.000 It looks like a house from a porn. 1.00
01:29:32.000 It's an Airbnb, too.
01:29:34.000 It is an Airbnb.
01:29:35.000 Yeah.
01:29:35.000 It is weird how money changes you.
01:29:37.000 Yeah.
01:29:37.000 Like it changes what you're accustomed to.
01:29:39.000 Mm hmm.
01:29:40.000 You get a little accustomed to the stuff.
01:29:42.000 I was thinking about this.
01:29:43.000 Yeah.
01:29:44.000 You get accustomed to the nice things, but I keep trying to change and I'm just not really changing.
01:29:49.000 What do you mean? As a human?
01:29:50.000 Yeah.
01:29:51.000 The cement is dry.
01:29:52.000 You're always going to be Mechanicsburg.
01:29:53.000 Yeah.
01:29:54.000 It's light beers.
01:29:54.000 It's Mechanicsburg.
01:29:55.000 It's like all of a sudden I realized I'm just getting drunk at higher places.
01:29:59.000 Like, I'm just in a taller building getting drunk.
01:29:59.000 Right.
01:30:01.000 Yeah, with more expensive beer.
01:30:02.000 It's the exact same beer.
01:30:03.000 It's the exact same beer.
01:30:05.000 Everybody at Deep Creek.
01:30:06.000 It's the same beer, but the price is bad.
01:30:07.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
01:30:08.000 Everybody at Deep Creek was like poor white trash in like Maryland. 1.00
01:30:11.000 And then they got rich. 1.00
01:30:12.000 And when they were poor, we could just barely afford one Bud Light.
01:30:15.000 And now they're rich, like, 10 Bud Lights.
01:30:17.000 What is that?
01:30:18.000 Deep Creek Lake is where pontooners go to parties.
01:30:20.000 Yeah, pontoons.
01:30:21.000 Where is that?
01:30:22.000 It's like deep, almost by West Virginia.
01:30:25.000 Oh, it's a giant lake.
01:30:26.000 It rules. 0.75
01:30:28.000 Same with New Orleans.
01:30:29.000 We'd go out to the Boga Chita and tube all day.
01:30:31.000 Remember tubing?
01:30:31.000 Yeah.
01:30:32.000 You sit on a river with a beer and a float and a snake.
01:30:32.000 Tubebing.
01:30:34.000 If you got a piss, you just jump down and walk along the way.
01:30:36.000 You jump down.
01:30:37.000 Yeah, you just pee in the water.
01:30:38.000 I think it's good that you're not changing.
01:30:40.000 It's a good sign.
01:30:41.000 It'd be nice if I could.
01:30:41.000 I'll change.
01:30:43.000 Nah.
01:30:44.000 Nah, I think you'd change a little.
01:30:45.000 It'd ruin you.
01:30:46.000 You got some good stuff going on. 0.99
01:30:48.000 Literally, if you said this to Shane yesterday, if you go, you've changed, he'd be like, What the fuck is that supposed to mean? 0.96
01:30:54.000 Well, it's just wrong. 0.98
01:30:55.000 I know. 0.99
01:30:56.000 And I'd go, God damn, I wish I could. 0.99
01:30:57.000 He dressed the same. 0.99
01:30:59.000 But you're not going to stay in a Holiday Express.
01:31:01.000 Sure.
01:31:02.000 You've stayed in this hotel.
01:31:03.000 You've handled fame very well.
01:31:04.000 Shane, you've handled it pretty well.
01:31:05.000 You haven't gotten weird at all.
01:31:07.000 Some people get weird just from the pressure of it.
01:31:09.000 Almost everybody.
01:31:10.000 Yeah.
01:31:11.000 Almost everybody.
01:31:12.000 98% get different.
01:31:14.000 I'm thinking of eight comics in my head right now who have gone full diva.
01:31:17.000 Yeah, they get weird.
01:31:18.000 It's very strange.
01:31:20.000 Shane, I know you have not changed.
01:31:21.000 Oh, the bottle?
01:31:22.000 You've changed, bro.
01:31:23.000 You've probably changed. 1.00
01:31:26.000 What the fuck? 1.00
01:31:27.000 Wait, you 40-40 motherfucker. 1.00
01:31:29.000 You work for Israel. 1.00
01:31:30.000 Now, this is. 0.92
01:31:32.000 That's a change.
01:31:33.000 That's a change.
01:31:33.000 Some people like the aluminum taste.
01:31:36.000 Bottle beer taste in a can.
01:31:37.000 There was a commercial I remember when I was little.
01:31:38.000 What?
01:31:39.000 It was some beer, and they go bottle beer taste in a can.
01:31:43.000 I was like, is bottle beer better?
01:31:44.000 Some people like the aluminum flavor.
01:31:47.000 Yeah.
01:31:48.000 I like.
01:31:49.000 Give me a glass bottle of Bottle Beater.
01:31:54.000 Keystone.
01:31:54.000 That's what it was.
01:31:55.000 Bottle Beater beer.
01:31:57.000 What?
01:31:57.000 My memory served?
01:31:58.000 Bad beer. 1.00
01:31:59.000 Just across those Keystones.
01:32:00.000 This is a commercial from 1948.
01:32:03.000 That's what I remember.
01:32:04.000 Look how grainy it is.
01:32:05.000 I remember Israel got independence and I was watching this commercial.
01:32:08.000 Yeah, have you guys watched the Hogan Doc?
01:32:11.000 It's good, dude. 0.99
01:32:12.000 I fucking cry. 0.99
01:32:13.000 Really? 0.99
01:32:14.000 It's so good.
01:32:15.000 When he's getting sued for taking down Belzer, he rules.
01:32:18.000 And he's like, I was making $3,500 a month and I'm getting sued for $500,000.
01:32:22.000 I was famous but not rich.
01:32:23.000 And they're like, what are we going to do?
01:32:25.000 Oh, he rules.
01:32:26.000 I didn't even know he got sued for that.
01:32:28.000 To go into MSG, I mean, he choked the guy on Contras.
01:32:31.000 He's been in class.
01:32:31.000 He's been in class.
01:32:32.000 He's had a lot of problems everywhere.
01:32:35.000 He could have, John Jones used to do this all the time, but at least it was soft mat.
01:32:38.000 This was like hard floor, and he just threw it off.
01:32:40.000 Yeah, but John Jones was doing a UFC fight against Miyoto Machito.
01:32:43.000 Someone who agreed.
01:32:45.000 He does it, and then if he just laid him down, he'd be like point proven.
01:32:50.000 Right.
01:32:50.000 But he had to bring it.
01:32:51.000 He's on TV.
01:32:52.000 He couldn't have that.
01:32:52.000 He's drunk and on steroids.
01:32:55.000 And on coke. 1.00
01:32:56.000 And someone's like, yo, your shit's fake. 1.00
01:32:58.000 Is that what Bowser said? 1.00
01:32:59.000 That it's fake?
01:33:00.000 It's so funny, too, because he's like, oh, you think I'm fake?
01:33:03.000 You're like, no, but you don't do that.
01:33:03.000 Is that fake?
01:33:05.000 When I'm talking, it is fake.
01:33:07.000 Do you remember when John Stossel confronted that wrestler backstage? 0.99
01:33:10.000 And the wrestler just bitch slapped him a bunch of times, slapped the fuck out of him. 1.00
01:33:10.000 Yeah, it was great. 1.00
01:33:14.000 I think that ruined that guy's career, though.
01:33:16.000 Stossel or the wrestler?
01:33:17.000 Yeah.
01:33:17.000 The wrestler.
01:33:18.000 I never heard of this.
01:33:19.000 I don't know.
01:33:19.000 I think, who was the wrestler?
01:33:21.000 Stossel's still around.
01:33:22.000 Stossel's still around, but I think it ruined the wrestler's career.
01:33:24.000 Whoa. 0.84
01:33:25.000 Because he beat the fuck out of him. 0.96
01:33:26.000 He looks like, Yeah, he can. 0.96
01:33:27.000 I feel like in my head he looks like Sid Vicious. 0.99
01:33:29.000 Well, he's a giant dude, and he bitch slapped him open palm to the ear, which could definitely make you go deaf. 0.94
01:33:35.000 But I mean, if you told BJ Penn in his prime or anybody, like, I think what you do is fake, they'd be like, it's not. 0.96
01:33:42.000 John Stossel was slapped twice by WWF wrestler Dr. D. David Schultz backstage in Madison Square Garden after calling pro wrestling fake during a 2020 expose.
01:33:50.000 The incident left Stossel with pain and ringing in his ears, leading to a lawsuit against WWF.
01:33:56.000 Jewish wrestler. 1.00
01:33:57.000 You think.
01:33:58.000 Oh, he just slipped right out.
01:33:58.000 He made money.
01:34:00.000 I was like, at least he's not pissing in a kombucha jar. 1.00
01:34:00.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
01:34:02.000 He probably is. 1.00
01:34:03.000 Give it on Alan.
01:34:04.000 Here it is.
01:34:04.000 So he's grabbing him.
01:34:06.000 He gets him in this sleeper hold and he slumps and then he just drops him.
01:34:11.000 Head hit the floor hard.
01:34:12.000 How professional is he, though, when he gets home?
01:34:14.000 This incident is from a 1985 episode of. 0.99
01:34:16.000 What the fuck? 1.00
01:34:19.000 So Belzer was talking shit, saying it was fake. 1.00
01:34:22.000 Great host, though. 1.00
01:34:23.000 He pops right up and goes to commercials.
01:34:24.000 All right, we'll be right back.
01:34:25.000 Yeah.
01:34:26.000 Head's bleeding and everything.
01:34:28.000 That is crazy.
01:34:29.000 Oh, wow.
01:34:29.000 Look at the blood on the back of his head.
01:34:32.000 It's spurting out on his jacket.
01:34:34.000 Look at that.
01:34:35.000 What a pro.
01:34:36.000 Yeah, that is.
01:34:37.000 Chris Rock could have learned today.
01:34:38.000 He's quite professional.
01:34:39.000 He seems happy.
01:34:40.000 Look at Mr. T.
01:34:41.000 He doesn't seem upset at all.
01:34:43.000 And then he sued.
01:34:45.000 Yep.
01:34:45.000 But you got to be a pro.
01:34:47.000 But also, you got to be, you know.
01:34:51.000 I mean, his head looked like Kennedy.
01:34:54.000 $400,000 settlement. 0.59
01:34:55.000 Next.
01:34:56.000 Famously used the money to buy a home in France, jokingly named it Shea Hogan.
01:35:01.000 He bought a house in France.
01:35:01.000 That's fun.
01:35:03.000 He lived in France for a while. 0.99
01:35:04.000 And then he was still a Jew. 1.00
01:35:05.000 He's had to be. 1.00
01:35:06.000 Yeah.
01:35:07.000 Got a lawsuit for that.
01:35:08.000 Litigious.
01:35:10.000 Yeah.
01:35:10.000 He didn't used to pay medical bills.
01:35:11.000 He bought a house.
01:35:12.000 Yeah.
01:35:13.000 That means it's a bonus.
01:35:14.000 In France. 1.00
01:35:15.000 That's a Jew move. 1.00
01:35:16.000 And I think he was still doing that Law and Order show and just flying back and forth to France. 1.00
01:35:20.000 I met him once.
01:35:21.000 It's the funniest thing because I saw him in like early, early, like doing those late night shows, you know, as a kid.
01:35:25.000 And it was like, oh, that's a comedian.
01:35:27.000 And then he's done a lot of comics have this trajectory do nothing comedic.
01:35:31.000 Yep.
01:35:32.000 It's like comedic coded serious.
01:35:34.000 Well, he was a comic.
01:35:35.000 He did a lot of comedy.
01:35:35.000 Yeah.
01:35:36.000 I saw him do stand up in Boston in the 80s.
01:35:39.000 But then he became like just serious, just a funny guy in serious roles and not even that funny.
01:35:39.000 In the 80s.
01:35:44.000 No.
01:35:44.000 And then dropped stand up.
01:35:46.000 Just drop.
01:35:48.000 It's so easy.
01:35:49.000 It's that velvet prison.
01:35:50.000 They start giving you money.
01:35:51.000 You start showing up.
01:35:53.000 You're in service.
01:35:54.000 You're eating. 0.99
01:35:55.000 Stand up as a blue collar guy. 0.64
01:35:56.000 Also, his co worker is a guy who made a song called Cop Killer.
01:36:00.000 He's like, I'm rich now too.
01:36:02.000 Don't even worry about who we used to be.
01:36:02.000 We're both rich.
01:36:04.000 Chris Maloney.
01:36:04.000 Yeah.
01:36:05.000 That's interesting.
01:36:06.000 Not Chris Maloney.
01:36:09.000 Yeah, eventually they go, I'm just not that guy.
01:36:11.000 I'm not 25 anymore.
01:36:12.000 I know, but I mean, it's still a Carlin did it till he died.
01:36:14.000 Carlin was a real one.
01:36:16.000 Yeah, Rickles.
01:36:17.000 Rickles did it until he died.
01:36:18.000 No.
01:36:18.000 Rivers.
01:36:18.000 But Carl was like anti establishment, never changed who he was.
01:36:22.000 Tell us what Belzer was beginning.
01:36:24.000 He was kind of a guy.
01:36:25.000 He was very conspiracy theory.
01:36:27.000 He wrote a book on Elvis, Bigfoot, and flying saucers, I think it was.
01:36:31.000 Wow.
01:36:32.000 I read it back in the day.
01:36:33.000 It's a conspiracy theory book by Belzer.
01:36:35.000 You wrote five different conspiracy books.
01:36:36.000 What? 1.00
01:36:37.000 What the fuck? 1.00
01:36:37.000 Really? 1.00
01:36:38.000 UFOs, JFKs, and Elvis.
01:36:40.000 Conspiracies you don't have to be crazy to believe.
01:36:42.000 Wow.
01:36:43.000 Dead Wrongs, straight facts on the country's most controversial cover ups.
01:36:46.000 Hit list, an in depth investigation into mysterious deaths of witnesses, the JFK assassination. 1.00
01:36:51.000 He's ahead of his time with that shit. 1.00
01:36:51.000 Wow. 1.00
01:36:53.000 Yeah, he was an interesting guy.
01:36:54.000 Juanon.
01:36:56.000 Very interesting guy.
01:36:58.000 Wow.
01:36:59.000 People loved him.
01:37:00.000 He was a respected comedian.
01:37:01.000 He was a crowd work guy.
01:37:02.000 He was the host.
01:37:03.000 He was always the host.
01:37:04.000 Yeah.
01:37:04.000 He did crowd work for SNL for five years.
01:37:06.000 Oh!
01:37:07.000 Wow.
01:37:08.000 Crowd warm up.
01:37:08.000 Really?
01:37:09.000 Wow.
01:37:10.000 Back in the day, he was, you know, like a comics comic.
01:37:14.000 But there was a bunch of those guys.
01:37:14.000 Yeah.
01:37:15.000 Like, Leno was the comics comic.
01:37:17.000 Totally.
01:37:18.000 Back in the day.
01:37:19.000 When I started, they were like the second best guy.
01:37:21.000 They also prior.
01:37:21.000 But like, the second best comic.
01:37:23.000 Who is that going to be?
01:37:24.000 And a lot of people were like, it was Leno.
01:37:25.000 I'm like, Isn't that nuts?
01:37:27.000 What?
01:37:27.000 Yeah.
01:37:28.000 Apparently, in the 70s, he was a fucking animal. 1.00
01:37:30.000 That's what I hear. 1.00
01:37:31.000 Like, you get that for a reason.
01:37:32.000 Yeah.
01:37:33.000 You don't just some open mic or who gets a Tonight Show.
01:37:36.000 Yeah, but it's that thing.
01:37:37.000 The Tonight Show was just the golden thing.
01:37:40.000 Oh, he's got bones. 1.00
01:37:41.000 Not the fucking eagle. 0.99
01:37:42.000 And he's got glasses on now. 1.00
01:37:44.000 Oh, that's a good one.
01:37:45.000 Eagles.
01:37:46.000 Da, da, da.
01:37:47.000 The 70s was like the golden era for those kind of comics.
01:37:51.000 Oh, yeah.
01:37:52.000 I mean, you had Carlin, he got, I think, four heart attacks from Coke.
01:37:56.000 Whoa, really?
01:37:57.000 Something like that, yeah.
01:37:59.000 Maybe Pryor was four and he was three, but they were both up there.
01:38:02.000 Jesus Christ.
01:38:03.000 I didn't know Carlin had that many heart attacks.
01:38:04.000 I mean, give it a goo, good JMO.
01:38:06.000 I could be.
01:38:07.000 How many heart attacks did Carl.
01:38:09.000 He had three heart attacks from cocaine.
01:38:10.000 I believe it was three.
01:38:11.000 Yeah.
01:38:12.000 We also had a pill problem for a while.
01:38:13.000 Yeah.
01:38:14.000 He had to get off pills.
01:38:15.000 This is like later in his life.
01:38:17.000 Right.
01:38:17.000 Like late in his life, he was hooked on the pills.
01:38:19.000 Oh, yeah.
01:38:20.000 Carlin.
01:38:20.000 Carlin.
01:38:21.000 Late in his life.
01:38:21.000 Yeah.
01:38:22.000 Big drug guy.
01:38:23.000 Deep into his 60s and 70s.
01:38:24.000 He was the coolest of all the old, amazing guys I met. 0.99
01:38:28.000 Shit. 0.99
01:38:28.000 He was up there for sure. 0.99
01:38:29.000 But like, I had to go get him a sandwich.
01:38:32.000 Really?
01:38:33.000 He did like a month at the store. 1.00
01:38:34.000 Shut up. 0.96
01:38:35.000 Yeah, a month of main room shows. 1.00
01:38:36.000 Oh, yeah.
01:38:37.000 What year?
01:38:37.000 2001, 2002, 2003.
01:38:40.000 Wow.
01:38:41.000 And I got him a Greenblatt statement.
01:38:43.000 He gave me 20 bucks.
01:38:43.000 I go, here you go.
01:38:44.000 I was like, oh, no, no.
01:38:45.000 Oh, man, they covered it.
01:38:46.000 He goes, I know.
01:38:47.000 It's for you.
01:38:48.000 I was like, oh, all right.
01:38:50.000 Sorry, Mr. Carl.
01:38:51.000 He goes, don't call me that.
01:38:52.000 Yeah, he was cool.
01:38:53.000 George.
01:38:53.000 He was very unassuming.
01:38:55.000 He was hanging out in the back area by the parking lot.
01:38:57.000 He would also sit in the back in Mitzi's chair.
01:38:59.000 You know, that one.
01:39:00.000 And if you did well, he stayed open mic sometimes, but only if you did well.
01:39:04.000 He'd be like, good job, man.
01:39:05.000 Wow.
01:39:06.000 And then other people didn't, and he'd be like, hi.
01:39:08.000 Yeah.
01:39:09.000 He's in the movie once.
01:39:09.000 Wow.
01:39:10.000 Yeah, he was a real comic.
01:39:12.000 I did a book signing because he had all those books, and I brought like, Four books to meet him at Borders on Wall Street.
01:39:18.000 And I waited in line, and all these people are going, I love you in Jersey Girl.
01:39:21.000 I love you in Bill and Ted's.
01:39:22.000 And I was like, ah, these people don't know comedy.
01:39:23.000 So I went up and I was like, I love this special, back in town, amazing, whatever.
01:39:27.000 And he goes, what do you do?
01:39:29.000 I go, I'm a comic.
01:39:29.000 He goes, yeah, you got a real talent for jacking around.
01:39:33.000 That's what he said.
01:39:34.000 Jacking around.
01:39:34.000 I don't even know what that means.
01:39:35.000 It was jacking around me.
01:39:36.000 It seemed like he hated me. 0.98
01:39:39.000 You got a real talent for jacking around.
01:39:41.000 It does seem like he hated me.
01:39:42.000 He goes, you sound like a comic.
01:39:43.000 I go, oh, yeah.
01:39:44.000 He goes, yeah, you got a real talent for jacking around.
01:39:46.000 Jacking around.
01:39:47.000 I don't know what that means, but I'll take it.
01:39:49.000 70s lingo.
01:39:50.000 I mean, he was around the day when Lenny Bruce was around.
01:39:50.000 Yeah.
01:39:53.000 Oh, yeah, he got arrested at his show.
01:39:55.000 Did he really?
01:39:56.000 He got arrested with Lenny Bruce?
01:39:57.000 Yeah, they were in the same cop car.
01:39:58.000 Really?
01:39:58.000 It's a big story.
01:40:00.000 That was his hero.
01:40:01.000 Carla came into Shop Left. 0.92
01:40:04.000 What?
01:40:05.000 Delete that, Jamie.
01:40:07.000 Jamie, delete that, please.
01:40:07.000 No.
01:40:08.000 That was a dry ball.
01:40:11.000 Jamie, delete that, please.
01:40:13.000 I didn't catch this.
01:40:14.000 We didn't even know you were joking.
01:40:16.000 We all tried to sort it out.
01:40:17.000 Like, what?
01:40:18.000 Am I missing this?
01:40:18.000 What does he mean by that?
01:40:19.000 Leave it to Israel to bomb. 1.00
01:40:27.000 Those guys paved the fucking road. 1.00
01:40:30.000 Tell you that. 1.00
01:40:30.000 Getting arrested for jokes. 1.00
01:40:32.000 Forget a heckler or some blogger.
01:40:34.000 What?
01:40:35.000 Going to jail.
01:40:36.000 Ruined Lenny Bruce's life.
01:40:37.000 Totally.
01:40:37.000 At the end of his life, he was just reading off court transcripts on stage, and the people get so bummed out.
01:40:42.000 They're like, hey, tell some jokes.
01:40:43.000 Yeah, like, we're here for you to do the thing.
01:40:45.000 There's video of it.
01:40:46.000 I bought video back in the day, VHS tapes of his recordings.
01:40:50.000 And one of the recordings was him on stage.
01:40:54.000 In this small club, like just reading off court transcripts.
01:40:57.000 And it was just terrible.
01:40:58.000 It's like guys who get canceled and that's all they talk about.
01:41:00.000 Right, right.
01:41:01.000 That's what happens.
01:41:02.000 Yeah, that can.
01:41:03.000 It becomes their thing.
01:41:04.000 It's so crazy.
01:41:05.000 You did an offhanded thing and then now it's your everything. 1.00
01:41:09.000 You got beaten one race by a chick and now that's your whole life by a trans chick. 1.00
01:41:13.000 That one, she went nuts. 1.00
01:41:15.000 That girl who lost, who came in fifth at her fucking race by a trans chick. 1.00
01:41:18.000 That one's kind of fair. 1.00
01:41:18.000 Hold on a second. 1.00
01:41:19.000 Yeah, that's another thing. 1.00
01:41:20.000 She should go, why the fuck is this allowed? 0.99
01:41:22.000 Not 10 years later. 0.99
01:41:24.000 What are you talking about?
01:41:24.000 When she's still late in her life.
01:41:25.000 What do you mean?
01:41:26.000 A comic got beaten in a race?
01:41:27.000 Not a comic.
01:41:28.000 I don't like your analogies.
01:41:29.000 I don't know. 0.99
01:41:30.000 She's a female athlete who lost to a trans athlete. 1.00
01:41:32.000 She's going, we should have laws about this. 1.00
01:41:34.000 Which one? 1.00
01:41:35.000 Oh, that's Riley Gaines. 1.00
01:41:36.000 It's her whole fucking personality now. 1.00
01:41:38.000 She didn't go to school for that. 1.00
01:41:39.000 She was on a track.
01:41:41.000 One thing happened, and that she's like completely changed. 0.79
01:41:44.000 Same as when comics get canceled.
01:41:45.000 It's like, oh, that's all BFRL.
01:41:46.000 She had a good point because not only did she not lose to that person, the Leah guy, but tied.
01:41:53.000 And then the Leah guy got the trophy.
01:41:55.000 But there's more to that.
01:41:55.000 No, no, no.
01:41:57.000 No, they tied for fourth.
01:41:57.000 Oh, yeah, Thomas.
01:42:00.000 Fourth and fifth.
01:42:00.000 Yeah, for sure.
01:42:01.000 And they go, hey, we only have four trophies. 1.00
01:42:03.000 We're going to get killed if we don't give it to the trans lady. 1.00
01:42:06.000 Can we just send you one later? 1.00
01:42:07.000 Do you know how crazy that is, though?
01:42:09.000 Do you know how crazy that is?
01:42:10.000 You give it to a guy who pretended he's a trans lady? 1.00
01:42:12.000 I'd be mad if that was at a fucking comedy competition. 1.00
01:42:14.000 First and fourth. 0.99
01:42:14.000 No one saw. 0.99
01:42:15.000 No, they'll say, we'll send it to you next week.
01:42:17.000 Well, wait, why is the guy coming in fourth?
01:42:19.000 He should be one.
01:42:20.000 Yeah, for sure. 1.00
01:42:21.000 This guy sucks. 1.00
01:42:22.000 Well, he sucked. 1.00
01:42:22.000 All of them lost. 1.00
01:42:23.000 There was a first, second, and third, and none of those people involved came in first, second, and third.
01:42:27.000 First, second, and third, nobody cares about.
01:42:29.000 Fourth and fifth is what they're arguing about.
01:42:32.000 Wait, I don't understand what your argument is, though.
01:42:35.000 Oh.
01:42:35.000 It's like, who cares?
01:42:36.000 It's like, yeah, I'm streaming.
01:42:37.000 No, no, no.
01:42:37.000 To make it your whole life after that is what you're saying about canceled comics.
01:42:40.000 They become that thing.
01:42:41.000 I understand, but.
01:42:42.000 She was going to school for not that.
01:42:45.000 And now that's her job. 0.88
01:42:46.000 Who cares what they're going to school for?
01:42:48.000 You're saying it changed your whole trajectory. 1.00
01:42:50.000 What'd you go to school for, bitch? 1.00
01:42:51.000 English, literature, breaking down analysis of life and stuff. 1.00
01:42:54.000 Are you doing well on that right now?
01:42:56.000 Yeah, pretty much.
01:42:57.000 Yeah, you're doing terrible at that.
01:42:58.000 This moment right here that's failing you.
01:43:01.000 No, you say these canceled comics go and they can make that their whole life. 1.00
01:43:04.000 This chick is not doing that. 1.00
01:43:06.000 She tied a race for fourth and fifth, and now that's all she does for a living. 1.00
01:43:09.000 What is an example of a canceled comic that's made it their whole life?
01:43:13.000 Who are you talking about?
01:43:14.000 I don't want to name anybody.
01:43:15.000 Right.
01:43:16.000 But we've just talked about that.
01:43:17.000 There's a lot of people that are on Netflix.
01:43:18.000 I understand what you're saying. 0.99
01:43:20.000 Jew is on Netflix.
01:43:20.000 Sort of.
01:43:22.000 It's on Netflix now. 1.00
01:43:22.000 Jew's on Netflix. 1.00
01:43:23.000 That is pretty cool that Netflix bought it and posted it on YouTube.
01:43:26.000 They didn't buy it, they're just putting it up.
01:43:29.000 That's fine.
01:43:29.000 Ah!
01:43:29.000 Fucking Jew.
01:43:30.000 Fucking Jew. 1.00
01:43:31.000 You get the eyeballs. 1.00
01:43:31.000 I don't care. 1.00
01:43:32.000 It was already on YouTube.
01:43:33.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:43:34.000 No, absolutely.
01:43:35.000 Can you keep it on YouTube as well, or do you have to take it down?
01:43:37.000 Hey, that's very interesting.
01:43:38.000 How many views did it have on YouTube?
01:43:40.000 Millions.
01:43:41.000 Eight million.
01:43:42.000 It should have been six.
01:43:42.000 Eight million.
01:43:43.000 Nice.
01:43:44.000 That would have been great.
01:43:45.000 Bro, Shane at the Creek is like 50.
01:43:47.000 53.
01:43:47.000 That's insane.
01:43:48.000 Yeah, there's an Indian guy that. 1.00
01:43:50.000 Broke the record in a week. 1.00
01:43:53.000 Wow.
01:43:53.000 Oh, is that a good idea?
01:43:55.000 Somebody sent it to me and they're like, he broke your record in a week. 0.99
01:43:59.000 Damn. 0.99
01:44:00.000 It was 55 minutes. 1.00
01:44:00.000 Is it in Indian? 1.00
01:44:01.000 Is it in Hindi?
01:44:02.000 Yeah.
01:44:03.000 Is it the Canons guy?
01:44:03.000 Yeah, it's 50 languages.
01:44:05.000 Yeah, he's gone.
01:44:06.000 Yeah, this is crazy.
01:44:07.000 There's billions of them.
01:44:09.000 But how do you know with this is a thing with views these days, though.
01:44:13.000 There's companies that will jack your views up.
01:44:16.000 Yeah, but that's.
01:44:16.000 Sure, you've got to pay for that.
01:44:17.000 Yeah, but you could pay for it, but you could get millions of views that way.
01:44:20.000 You could see the difference in like. 0.97
01:44:22.000 We always do this when we talk shit about people who do it. 0.93
01:44:23.000 Engagement? 0.98
01:44:24.000 Yeah, they're like 5 million views, 30 comments.
01:44:30.000 Right, right, right.
01:44:31.000 What is a view?
01:44:32.000 How much do you have to watch for a view to count?
01:44:34.000 I think it's just a click and click off counts as a view.
01:44:37.000 That's a good question.
01:44:38.000 The best is when you send someone, like an agent or something, a clip for them to see, and they go, We watch it, we're not happy with it.
01:44:44.000 And then you look at it, you're like, Still has zero views.
01:44:47.000 It's a private clip.
01:44:48.000 You definitely didn't watch it.
01:44:50.000 We liked it, we're not happy with it.
01:44:53.000 Or more embarrassing when someone sends you something.
01:44:55.000 Like I just did.
01:44:57.000 That guy sent me something that I've watched it 30 times over and over.
01:45:00.000 And it's just me, and he's going to see all the views are just me going.
01:45:04.000 It's a private one. 0.64
01:45:05.000 That's so sick. 0.79
01:45:07.000 Oh, that's so sick.
01:45:08.000 I feel bad for Young Comics.
01:45:10.000 Everything is about views, shares, number of followers.
01:45:13.000 How many followers do you have?
01:45:14.000 It's not even about funny.
01:45:15.000 Yeah.
01:45:16.000 I still think it is, though.
01:45:18.000 I think eventually the cream rises, but managers will literally be like, we've got to hire this guy.
01:45:18.000 It is.
01:45:22.000 They don't know shit. 0.99
01:45:22.000 Well, yeah, they're not going to. 0.99
01:45:24.000 It's kind of like the industry in general.
01:45:25.000 They're like, how much.
01:45:26.000 Money, did your movie make?
01:45:27.000 And then if they don't mind getting an Oscar nomination, but that's not what they're really in it for.
01:45:33.000 I just, with the comics today being worried about you got to put out clips, you got to do that.
01:45:39.000 It's like, sure, yeah, it's like, do it, but it's like, build an act.
01:45:43.000 I don't know.
01:45:44.000 Comedians always have excuses for why they're not successful, which is fine.
01:45:48.000 Of course.
01:45:48.000 I did the exact same thing.
01:45:49.000 But they're all like, well, this guy, yeah, he's only got it because he put all those clips out and did all.
01:45:54.000 It's like, I don't know.
01:45:55.000 Whatever works.
01:45:56.000 Try to be. 0.96
01:45:56.000 Funny and yeah, who gives a fuck why someone's doing well? 0.96
01:45:59.000 Who gives a shit of a YouTuber selling out a comic club? 0.99
01:46:02.000 It's not you. 1.00
01:46:02.000 Who fucking cares? 1.00
01:46:03.000 What are you doing exactly? 1.00
01:46:04.000 Just do your shit. 1.00
01:46:05.000 And I understand, by the way, I understand. 1.00
01:46:07.000 I fucking loved that thing that you did where you did that documentary showing all the leading up to Boulder.
01:46:13.000 The new thing that you did, yeah, it was great. 0.91
01:46:15.000 The back crowds, the documentary, thanks.
01:46:17.000 It's great and it's a great insight as to like the development of bits.
01:46:21.000 I really, really enjoy it.
01:46:22.000 I wish you were my dad, yeah, yeah, by the way, I could be your dad, Mark.
01:46:26.000 I want you to know he told me that behind your back earlier.
01:46:29.000 Whoa.
01:46:29.000 Yeah.
01:46:29.000 Me and Ram were just sitting out there.
01:46:30.000 He was like, You see that thing? 1.00
01:46:31.000 I was like, Fuck no, I'm not watching Mark's shit. 1.00
01:46:33.000 Yeah, it's an hour long. 1.00
01:46:35.000 It's good.
01:46:36.000 It's really good.
01:46:37.000 What is it?
01:46:37.000 On the way to the special?
01:46:38.000 Yeah, I did a 10 sold out at the Dallas Improv, and the special taped like a week or two later. 0.88
01:46:43.000 So I was just tweaking and fine tuning, and I filmed all the bombs and all that shit. 0.81
01:46:48.000 Cool. 0.97
01:46:48.000 It's really great. 0.97
01:46:49.000 It's really great because it's like him in a bodega going over the bits, like drinking coffee, reading over his lines, and then tweaking it and changing them.
01:46:57.000 Yeah.
01:46:57.000 Yeah.
01:46:58.000 Hour and 12 minutes.
01:46:59.000 Uh oh. 0.84
01:47:00.000 Not the gay quote. 1.00
01:47:01.000 That's gay. 0.99
01:47:02.000 So yeah, go back to that. 1.00
01:47:02.000 It's really good. 1.00
01:47:04.000 Go back to that.
01:47:06.000 The quote is relevant.
01:47:07.000 Struggle itself towards the heights is enough to.
01:47:08.000 Fill a man's heart, one must imagine syphysis. 1.00
01:47:11.000 That's a Salek's ass. 1.00
01:47:14.000 It was. 1.00
01:47:14.000 Pushing the boulder. 1.00
01:47:15.000 It's the boulder.
01:47:16.000 Pushing the boulder.
01:47:17.000 Did you do this?
01:47:18.000 I didn't do that part.
01:47:19.000 Who did this?
01:47:20.000 The director.
01:47:20.000 Albert Camus.
01:47:21.000 He beat his ass. 1.00
01:47:23.000 It is a little pretentious for what this is. 1.00
01:47:26.000 A little bit.
01:47:26.000 Now we come back to Earth.
01:47:28.000 Sheath underwear.
01:47:29.000 Come back to Earth. 0.66
01:47:30.000 Yeah.
01:47:30.000 Oh, God, Mark.
01:47:31.000 Why do you have a nice ass, you fucking homo? 1.00
01:47:36.000 Why do you have nice legs, you pussy? 1.00
01:47:36.000 I'm clavicular. 1.00
01:47:39.000 He micro fractures his butt cheeks.
01:47:41.000 I was deadly hung over there.
01:47:42.000 That's hilarious. 0.91
01:47:43.000 Just shitting it out.
01:47:44.000 But it's a great, it's really great for comics to see, especially young guys coming up, like what the process is like.
01:47:49.000 You know, to see a guy like you who's been in the game a long time, he's really good.
01:47:53.000 See a bunch of specials already.
01:47:53.000 Yeah.
01:47:55.000 See you bombing and tweaking and showing everybody the bits not working well and then working really well.
01:48:00.000 Oh, thanks.
01:48:00.000 I appreciate it.
01:48:01.000 Yeah, there's this idea that everything's magic.
01:48:04.000 No, you show them like their struggle.
01:48:05.000 They're like, oh, okay.
01:48:06.000 Just trial and error.
01:48:07.000 Like, how many times have you seen Louis bomb and you're like, well, this guy's the best ever?
01:48:10.000 Chris Rock, too.
01:48:11.000 Yeah.
01:48:12.000 Chris Rock used to come to the store and the crowd would go nuts and he would say, relax.
01:48:15.000 It's not going to be that funny.
01:48:17.000 Lower your experience.
01:48:17.000 Right, right.
01:48:18.000 You tell them that because he was just running material and trying to find every possible angle and get laughs occasionally and sometimes not and then tweak it afterwards.
01:48:27.000 Yep, yep.
01:48:28.000 That's part of it.
01:48:29.000 That's why Eddie Murphy can't come back because I don't think he's willing to bomb after six months.
01:48:34.000 It's not even six months, it's years.
01:48:36.000 We've had this discussion on this podcast.
01:48:38.000 Play R. Kelly. 0.99
01:48:38.000 It's also the velvet prison, the movies, the fucking craft service, getting picked up in a limo. 0.99
01:48:46.000 It's like the grind of writing your own material, putting it all together, everything riding on your back. 0.98
01:48:50.000 Like, that is a Warriors game.
01:48:52.000 And some people don't want to do that anymore.
01:48:54.000 It's also like you got to do a Tuesday at the stand where there's 19 people.
01:48:58.000 I also understand older comics back in the day not wanting to do it because movies were so much more lucrative.
01:49:05.000 And stand up is not.
01:49:05.000 Oh, yeah.
01:49:06.000 Stand up is 10 times more lucrative.
01:49:08.000 It is now.
01:49:09.000 And it's like, dude, do stand up.
01:49:11.000 Yeah.
01:49:11.000 Yeah.
01:49:12.000 Like, just do stand up.
01:49:13.000 I mean, I never thought a couple people back then go, I would take a pay cut if I did a sitcom.
01:49:17.000 And it was like a couple people.
01:49:18.000 And now it's like kind of everybody.
01:49:20.000 Yeah.
01:49:20.000 You'd have to make Seinfeld money like season seven and beyond to go, I'll take off the road for this.
01:49:25.000 So, there's certain guys.
01:49:26.000 And now there is no Seinfeld money.
01:49:28.000 It doesn't exist.
01:49:29.000 I know. 1.00
01:49:30.000 Miss Pat is the only person with a sitcom right now.
01:49:32.000 No, what about this guy?
01:49:33.000 Oh, that's right.
01:49:33.000 DT.
01:49:34.000 But you have Tires, it's different, though, because it's a single camera.
01:49:37.000 Yeah.
01:49:38.000 Like Tires is like a show.
01:49:39.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:49:39.000 It's a sitcom.
01:49:40.000 It's a show.
01:49:41.000 It's a great funny show.
01:49:43.000 But it's like there's a difference between the thing that everybody wanted was the live audience, four camera.
01:49:43.000 Thanks.
01:49:50.000 You do it on NBC, CBS, you get residuals.
01:49:53.000 That was like the golden carrot.
01:49:54.000 That they hung over your head.
01:49:55.000 Totally.
01:49:56.000 Stand up couldn't pay.
01:49:58.000 No, nobody did anything but clubs back then.
01:50:01.000 It was like Dice Clay.
01:50:02.000 Weird stand up.
01:50:03.000 And then afterwards, it was Dane Cook.
01:50:04.000 We saw a billboard of a poster.
01:50:06.000 His thing's like a museum.
01:50:07.000 And a poster for Evening at the Improv with him and Chris Rock.
01:50:10.000 Who's that?
01:50:11.000 David Spade.
01:50:12.000 Oh, wow.
01:50:13.000 And I was there with Nate, and he goes, You did like club for this?
01:50:16.000 And he goes, Bro, we only did clubs.
01:50:19.000 None of us ever did theaters back then.
01:50:20.000 If we were really good, you'd do six days at a club.
01:50:22.000 Carlin did theaters.
01:50:24.000 Legends did theaters.
01:50:24.000 Yeah.
01:50:25.000 Dice did MSG once.
01:50:27.000 Yeah, Steve Martin a couple times.
01:50:28.000 Oh, Dice did MSG many times.
01:50:31.000 He did Nassau Coliseum.
01:50:33.000 Dice did.
01:50:33.000 Dice was in enormous places when no one was doing it.
01:50:38.000 Dice was the original stadium act.
01:50:41.000 But then it was no one until Dane.
01:50:43.000 Between Dice and Dane, there was nobody.
01:50:43.000 Right.
01:50:45.000 And now it's a lot of guys.
01:50:46.000 And now people are playing at Des Moines.
01:50:47.000 They're playing at the arenas.
01:50:48.000 Yeah, it's not that many guys.
01:50:51.000 I mean, it's probably at least 20.
01:50:52.000 Compare it.
01:50:53.000 Bargazzi, Kevin R., Sebastian, Tom.
01:50:53.000 Arenas?
01:50:56.000 Regularly?
01:50:57.000 Hinchcliffe, Louis.
01:50:59.000 Well, hold on, fellas.
01:51:01.000 Let's not diminish it.
01:51:03.000 No, no, no.
01:51:04.000 That was just an issue.
01:51:05.000 New Sebastian, Gabriel.
01:51:06.000 He's 20?
01:51:07.000 Gabriel's doing giant places.
01:51:07.000 Joe Coy, giant places.
01:51:09.000 Kevin Hart.
01:51:09.000 Joe Coy.
01:51:11.000 Matt Rife, giant places.
01:51:11.000 Matt Rife.
01:51:13.000 Matt Rife.
01:51:13.000 Segura.
01:51:14.000 Segura's doing arenas.
01:51:16.000 I met a guy, I met an Indian kid outside New York Comedy Club.
01:51:18.000 Indian kids will do something.
01:51:20.000 And I was like, oh, what are you doing in town?
01:51:21.000 He's like, oh, it's cool, man.
01:51:21.000 He goes, doing comedy.
01:51:22.000 What are you playing?
01:51:23.000 And he goes, MSG.
01:51:24.000 That doesn't count.
01:51:25.000 I was like, what? 1.00
01:51:26.000 Indians don't count. 1.00
01:51:27.000 Congratulations. 1.00
01:51:28.000 Indians count as much as Christian movies count in the box office. 1.00
01:51:31.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:51:32.000 You'd be top 10 every time.
01:51:34.000 It doesn't count.
01:51:34.000 Removal.
01:51:35.000 Yeah.
01:51:36.000 That's hilarious.
01:51:38.000 Yeah, that's probably 10, 12.
01:51:41.000 You know.
01:51:42.000 10 to 20.
01:51:42.000 Six arenas?
01:51:44.000 You see, though.
01:51:45.000 Or do an arena every once in a while.
01:51:47.000 Rife.
01:51:47.000 Matt Rive.
01:51:48.000 Rife's doing a lot.
01:51:49.000 Yeah.
01:51:50.000 It's a matter of whether you want to do arenas all the time.
01:51:52.000 The point is, way more than no one between Dane and Dice.
01:51:56.000 For sure.
01:51:56.000 Right.
01:51:57.000 For sure.
01:51:57.000 Yeah.
01:51:57.000 Because comedy's so big now.
01:51:59.000 Yeah.
01:51:59.000 And there's a ton of guys doing 1,500 seeders.
01:52:01.000 Yeah.
01:52:02.000 Yeah.
01:52:03.000 Oh, Schultz, I think, does arenas.
01:52:03.000 A lot of them.
01:52:04.000 I don't know if he's regularly doing arenas.
01:52:05.000 Oh, he does regular arenas.
01:52:06.000 Yeah.
01:52:07.000 He does arenas regularly.
01:52:08.000 Whenever he wants.
01:52:09.000 Whenever he wants.
01:52:10.000 Bert.
01:52:11.000 Yeah.
01:52:12.000 There you go.
01:52:12.000 Tom.
01:52:12.000 Yeah.
01:52:13.000 Tony.
01:52:14.000 There's a lot of people doing arenas now.
01:52:15.000 Mostly guys from my storytelling show.
01:52:18.000 Which is also online behind a paywall.
01:52:18.000 Oh.
01:52:22.000 The end.
01:52:23.000 These three guys are on it Arena comic.
01:52:25.000 Nice.
01:52:25.000 Theater comic.
01:52:26.000 Club almost sells out Saturdays.
01:52:29.000 And Denver.
01:52:30.000 And Denver's because you're likable.
01:52:32.000 Yeah.
01:52:34.000 We got Tony, Nate.
01:52:37.000 We got a bunch.
01:52:38.000 You, Tony, Nate.
01:52:40.000 Tom, four arena comics.
01:52:42.000 That's wild.
01:52:43.000 The three private jets were at that show.
01:52:46.000 And we got paid $500.
01:52:46.000 That's insane.
01:52:48.000 I got a story.
01:52:49.000 You can cut this out if you want.
01:52:50.000 Cut back in.
01:52:51.000 And we're back.
01:52:52.000 We're back.
01:52:53.000 You should be mad. 0.97
01:52:54.000 It stunk, bro. 0.76
01:52:56.000 I wouldn't want to do that. 0.70
01:52:57.000 It stunk.
01:52:58.000 We need a transition.
01:52:59.000 We need a transition.
01:53:00.000 Let's go back.
01:53:01.000 The last one. 0.99
01:53:01.000 The 9 11. 0.99
01:53:02.000 What?
01:53:02.000 Yeah.
01:53:04.000 What is that sound?
01:53:06.000 Go, baby, go. 1.00
01:53:10.000 Number two, fucking. 1.00
01:53:11.000 Oh, look at the gay Ayatollah. 1.00
01:53:17.000 Freedom's the only way. 1.00
01:53:18.000 Straight to Hormuz. 0.92
01:53:19.000 Iran needs to understand freedom's the only way. 1.00
01:53:22.000 Woo! 1.00
01:53:23.000 Fuck the regime. 1.00
01:53:24.000 We're coming back, brother. 1.00
01:53:25.000 Yeah. 0.95
01:53:26.000 We're bombing everybody, brother. 0.97
01:53:28.000 America. 1.00
01:53:29.000 We need to bomb everybody. 1.00
01:53:30.000 Fuck healthcare. 1.00
01:53:31.000 Homeless people. 1.00
01:53:32.000 Dude, I'm telling you, I met so many people who shut up in America when I was traveling, it made me more nationalistic. 0.58
01:53:36.000 I couldn't agree more than that.
01:53:38.000 If I go to another country and somebody's like, You guys are blah, blah, blah.
01:53:41.000 I go, dude, you guys are doing nothing.
01:53:43.000 Me and you are like, we need healthcare. 0.99
01:53:45.000 We're fucking up. 0.98
01:53:45.000 And somebody's like, why don't you guys have healthcare? 0.98
01:53:47.000 I'm like, why don't you shut your mouth? 1.00
01:53:48.000 Because we have stealth bombers, bitch. 1.00
01:53:50.000 All the Australians, like, you treat your minorities bad. 1.00
01:53:52.000 I'm like, you wiped yours out. 0.96
01:53:54.000 Yes, we have football.
01:53:55.000 Blow me.
01:53:56.000 Yeah.
01:53:57.000 Yeah, we have college football, bro.
01:53:59.000 We have college football.
01:54:00.000 We have solid points by everyone.
01:54:02.000 Once you go to another country, that's when you go. 0.96
01:54:03.000 Why don't you guys shut up?
01:54:05.000 Who's number two with stand up comedy? 0.97
01:54:06.000 What country's number two?
01:54:08.000 Oh, sure.
01:54:08.000 England.
01:54:08.000 England.
01:54:09.000 Well, Ricky Gervais, Jimmy Carr.
01:54:11.000 Those are two greats.
01:54:11.000 Carr is great.
01:54:12.000 Carr is a national, international great.
01:54:15.000 Car is the best.
01:54:15.000 Stuart Lee.
01:54:16.000 Car is so good.
01:54:17.000 Car is great.
01:54:18.000 He was so good.
01:54:18.000 He performed at the mothership.
01:54:19.000 He's running all these new jokes. 1.00
01:54:21.000 I was like, this guy is a motherfucker, dude. 1.00
01:54:23.000 He is. 1.00
01:54:23.000 Great writer. 1.00
01:54:24.000 He's just dominant and so calm.
01:54:26.000 So smart, man.
01:54:27.000 Such a smart dude. 1.00
01:54:28.000 Type shit. 1.00
01:54:29.000 If you had one of those brewskis, I'd like to get involved with you. 1.00
01:54:30.000 What are you looking for this time?
01:54:31.000 Glass or can?
01:54:33.000 I would never waste a glass on a bong.
01:54:35.000 Shane, you haven't changed at all.
01:54:37.000 I wish I could, brother.
01:54:39.000 It's time to change.
01:54:39.000 You don't want to change.
01:54:41.000 I haven't changed.
01:54:43.000 You have not.
01:54:43.000 I don't think I have.
01:54:44.000 You can't go out as much.
01:54:46.000 You did change very little.
01:54:48.000 You changed a little weird.
01:54:49.000 You changed in unimportant ways.
01:54:51.000 You're more into hunting.
01:54:53.000 But it's not like archery.
01:54:53.000 Wow.
01:54:55.000 It's different.
01:54:55.000 But that to me is my way to stay insane.
01:54:59.000 No, you just got to do a bunch of things like pool, archery, martial arts.
01:55:03.000 Those things just keep me sane.
01:55:04.000 I have to do some things that keep me from going off the rails.
01:55:07.000 Yeah.
01:55:07.000 And staying off of Twitter.
01:55:09.000 Didn't you have a thing where your manager, our business manager, one of them was like, hey, Joe, we got to, when you just started headlining, correct me if I'm wrong, we're like, we got to have a talk with you.
01:55:19.000 And you're like, what's the matter?
01:55:20.000 And they're like, buddy, we don't want to get this out of hand.
01:55:23.000 We know you have a gambling addiction and we want to get you help.
01:55:25.000 And you're like, what do you mean?
01:55:26.000 Like, you're blowing through money in a way.
01:55:28.000 And he goes, no, I just love lobster and steak.
01:55:31.000 Oh, I was eating steak and lobster.
01:55:32.000 That was my first.
01:55:34.000 My first developer, my manager thought that I had a gambling problem because I was spending so much money.
01:55:39.000 I'm like, bro, I'm eating steak and lobster every night.
01:55:42.000 He's like, you're not worried at all.
01:55:44.000 You're going to run out of money.
01:55:44.000 I'll go, I'll make more money.
01:55:46.000 We'll figure it out.
01:55:47.000 I'm like, once we get in the gate, like, I'm one of those people that, like, if I figured out how to get in the gate, I'm going.
01:55:53.000 I'm going to keep my foot on the gas.
01:55:55.000 I'll be fine.
01:55:55.000 Joe, you brought so many openers with you that we made more money than you.
01:55:59.000 We did the math once.
01:56:02.000 We're like, he's barely making more than us.
01:56:04.000 But it was about fun.
01:56:05.000 It was so fun.
01:56:05.000 It has to be fun.
01:56:06.000 To be about fun because I did gigs with like local guys, and some of them were great.
01:56:11.000 Like, that's how I got to meet Subura.
01:56:13.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:56:14.000 I mean, I met a bunch of guys who became my friends that were like local guys, but it was like one out of ten. 0.78
01:56:19.000 And that means nine times I'm in a town bored, watching TV, fucking not enjoying myself.
01:56:24.000 And then being there, sometimes they're mean, sometimes they step on your material on purpose. 0.99
01:56:28.000 And sometimes, yeah, and sometimes they'll be like, they'll do the negging thing a woman will do where she's like, they'll like, shit on you on purpose. 0.98
01:56:34.000 Like, I don't know you that well. 0.99
01:56:35.000 I'm trying to be nice to you.
01:56:36.000 Well, there's a lot of weirdness because you're the headliner and they're jealous and they think they should be the headliner.
01:56:40.000 Yeah.
01:56:41.000 You're going to go do local material, and you're like, all right.
01:56:43.000 Okay, buddy. 1.00
01:56:44.000 Fucking asshole. 1.00
01:56:45.000 There's a lot of fun. 1.00
01:56:46.000 Hey, you should do this.
01:56:47.000 Hey, let's switch tomorrow.
01:56:48.000 You can go on last for 15 minutes.
01:56:48.000 Yeah.
01:56:49.000 But the gigs were always a party.
01:56:52.000 We had fun everywhere we went.
01:56:54.000 We had fun.
01:56:55.000 Fun is key.
01:56:56.000 Like, I'll do Snapchat Fest, and you make, what, $17?
01:56:59.000 But, you know, my friend's like, ah, you make no money.
01:56:59.000 Yeah.
01:57:01.000 I'm like, it's fun.
01:57:02.000 It's a great weekend.
01:57:03.000 I was trying to explain this to guys in the.
01:57:06.000 I'm a good friend. 0.99
01:57:08.000 One of Tony's agents was trying to pitch this fucking horrible idea. 0.99
01:57:11.000 Not even Tony's agent. 0.98
01:57:13.000 Someone was trying to pitch this horrible idea where Tony would take a percentage of everybody's podcast that was on Kill Tony. 0.99
01:57:19.000 He was like, no fucking way. 0.97
01:57:22.000 And I was like, that money, if you got it from them, it wouldn't change the way you feel. 0.99
01:57:27.000 You would feel the same.
01:57:29.000 You wouldn't say, I feel so much better now that I have X more dollars in the bank. 1.00
01:57:33.000 But you would feel like a piece of shit because you were fucking people over. 1.00
01:57:38.000 You would pay all that money back plus to not feel that. 1.00
01:57:42.000 To not feel bad, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:57:43.000 You would give it all back. 1.00
01:57:44.000 You would not be a piece of shit. 1.00
01:57:46.000 It's like, There's nothing better than helping your buddies. 1.00
01:57:49.000 Nothing better.
01:57:50.000 It's kind of the only nice thing.
01:57:52.000 Shane pays people on the road out of spite.
01:57:55.000 What do you mean? 1.00
01:57:57.000 Like, Lev was talking dumb shit. 1.00
01:57:57.000 I do it. 1.00
01:57:59.000 He was so fucking, couldn't get out of his own fat way. 0.99
01:58:01.000 And he goes, No, clubs are better than arenas. 1.00
01:58:03.000 You're crazy. 0.88
01:58:04.000 And Shane's like, You've never done an arena. 0.99
01:58:05.000 And he goes, Dude, you know how Lev is?
01:58:08.000 I'll choose.
01:58:09.000 And he's like, I know what I'm talking about.
01:58:11.000 And then Shane's out of spite.
01:58:12.000 He goes, I'm going to give you a lot of cash to come over for me on the road.
01:58:16.000 And Lev's like, Arenas are better, and I paid my rent for the year.
01:58:23.000 Yeah, those shows, your crowds are great.
01:58:25.000 Those shows are so fun.
01:58:26.000 You do 15 to 20, you just play the hits.
01:58:28.000 It's a great time.
01:58:29.000 Fun is fun.
01:58:30.000 Fun is fun everywhere you go.
01:58:31.000 And I play Xbox with a bunch of guys from the NHL.
01:58:34.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:58:35.000 Dude, it's crazy.
01:58:36.000 You don't know where.
01:58:37.000 I don't think I've had a woman in my green room.
01:58:39.000 It's just 15 dudes.
01:58:40.000 We're trying to have a good time.
01:58:42.000 We're playing Xbox.
01:58:43.000 You can see the guy who owns Arena is so disappointed, too.
01:58:45.000 They come in thinking it's going to be cool because Stanford's cool now. 0.98
01:58:48.000 And they come in and it's me, Soda, and Shane playing some fucking video game. 0.99
01:58:51.000 It just smells like body odor. 0.99
01:58:53.000 And they're just like, ugh.
01:58:54.000 And there's chicken nuggets in the rider.
01:58:56.000 So my rider's chicken tenders in a case of beer.
01:58:56.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:58:59.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:58:59.000 And it sucks. 0.99
01:59:01.000 Second worst pizza in town and bring it. 0.99
01:59:03.000 Yeah.
01:59:05.000 Yeah.
01:59:06.000 But that video game you play brings everybody in.
01:59:08.000 It's a great icebreaker.
01:59:09.000 Yeah.
01:59:10.000 It's the hangout afterwards.
01:59:11.000 I had so many memories of us, like, some town and just going to anybody in the street.
01:59:15.000 Like, is there a place to eat around here?
01:59:17.000 Like, I don't know, is it Fogo to chat around?
01:59:18.000 I was like, what?
01:59:19.000 Yeah.
01:59:20.000 Well, all you need is us.
01:59:21.000 Like, in a green room sometimes, I'm like, I don't even want to go to the bar.
01:59:24.000 It's the hang.
01:59:24.000 This is the best.
01:59:25.000 The hang's everything.
01:59:26.000 Yeah, at the mothership.
01:59:27.000 It was like, whenever it was like, we're going under Mitzi's, I'm like, yeah, this is a great place to hang out.
01:59:31.000 This is right here. 0.59
01:59:32.000 We got to stay right here.
01:59:32.000 We got liquor.
01:59:33.000 Yeah, but Mitzi's, once it clears out, it's perfect. 0.86
01:59:37.000 Yeah.
01:59:37.000 Well, once the regular people are out, Yeah, once the crowd leaves.
01:59:41.000 That's the cool thing about Mitzi's, it becomes a private club after 11 p.m.
01:59:44.000 Yeah.
01:59:45.000 That's nice.
01:59:46.000 Always lose my voice in there, though. 1.00
01:59:48.000 Well, Tony's chain smoking like a fucking old lady. 1.00
01:59:48.000 Same. 1.00
01:59:51.000 He's chain smoking, everybody's drinking, there's great music playing.
01:59:54.000 He's like, I'll tell you.
01:59:57.000 Tony needs a cigarette extender.
01:59:58.000 That's a lesson to me.
02:00:00.000 Genius Limbs.
02:00:01.000 His ability to write roast jokes is extraordinary.
02:00:05.000 I gave him an angle yesterday on the.
02:00:05.000 It's very weird.
02:00:09.000 Can we see?
02:00:10.000 What is he on the end?
02:00:12.000 Oh, yeah.
02:00:13.000 I think, yeah, yeah.
02:00:14.000 I was like, What about this?
02:00:14.000 I just gave him an angle.
02:00:15.000 He goes, Oh, I'm like, Something like this.
02:00:17.000 He goes, Yeah, but wittier than that.
02:00:18.000 Yes.
02:00:19.000 I'm like, Yeah, I don't know how to write a joke.
02:00:21.000 Well, as soon as you got on the phone, I was like, They're there.
02:00:22.000 Yeah, they're there.
02:00:23.000 I'm like, Yeah, now you do your thing.
02:00:24.000 He's like, Those jokes are there.
02:00:25.000 He thinks in like that kind of joke, like roast joke form.
02:00:29.000 Like, that's how, like, he's so fat, he, like, that's how his mind works.
02:00:34.000 It's really fun to watch.
02:00:36.000 It's like, I don't, that muscle's a different muscle.
02:00:38.000 It's a different muscle.
02:00:39.000 Yeah, both your guys was good yesterday.
02:00:41.000 I'm it's funny watching they do a gonna be a massive thing ahead of time for a crowd.
02:00:46.000 The crowd's like, This is so cool.
02:00:48.000 Yeah, well, it's cool because they get to see it worked out.
02:00:49.000 Yeah, they're gonna get to see it live, right?
02:00:51.000 And you get to see people go, Yeah, the jokes are good.
02:00:53.000 Not on that one.
02:00:54.000 I'm very happy with the jokes.
02:00:55.000 And you're going out cold, right?
02:00:56.000 You gotta open it.
02:00:57.000 Yeah, that's tough.
02:00:58.000 I'm worried about I don't think I'm a good host as far as the hey, everybody, we're on live on Netflix.
02:01:06.000 I don't think I'm gonna be able to do that. 0.99
02:01:07.000 I'm gonna go, All right, fuck that. 1.00
02:01:09.000 Just be this is my joke. 1.00
02:01:10.000 This is my joke.
02:01:11.000 It doesn't matter.
02:01:12.000 Once you start talking, it's all good.
02:01:14.000 Dude, there's a video I saw of Waylon Jennings Jr.
02:01:16.000 I think it was him.
02:01:17.000 And they're doing a roast, like a barbecue.
02:01:20.000 And they're like, we're here, waiting for him to show up.
02:01:21.000 And he's been barbecuing into this thing for the last 14 hours.
02:01:25.000 And then they come in, some ladies interview him.
02:01:27.000 He's like, so we're ready for your roast.
02:01:28.000 He goes, oh, that's not mine.
02:01:30.000 He was like, no.
02:01:32.000 He goes, no, that's a TV thing.
02:01:32.000 She was like, what do you mean?
02:01:35.000 He goes, no, mine would be underground and we'd have moonshine.
02:01:38.000 And she goes, for the base thing?
02:01:39.000 No, for fun while we're waiting for the meat to come out.
02:01:42.000 Yeah.
02:01:43.000 He just like ruined the TV version of it.
02:01:45.000 He's like, no, that's a lie.
02:01:47.000 Yeah, I got kicked off of last comic standing for that because they put you in a room and they're like, they want you to have drama.
02:01:51.000 They're like, what do you think?
02:01:52.000 Who are you going to beat?
02:01:53.000 And I'm like, I'm probably going to lose.
02:01:54.000 And they're like, no, no, no. 1.00
02:01:55.000 You got to like talk shit. 1.00
02:01:56.000 And I'm like, oh, they don't want me on here. 1.00
02:01:58.000 I'm going to bomb.
02:01:58.000 And they're like, what are you doing?
02:02:00.000 You're ruining the show. 1.00
02:02:02.000 They want you to be like, fuck that guy. 1.00
02:02:03.000 I'm going to take him down. 1.00
02:02:04.000 Just say, hey, guys, whatever you want.
02:02:05.000 We know what this is.
02:02:06.000 I don't know how you would do it.
02:02:07.000 That's a tough part.
02:02:07.000 I'll do it.
02:02:08.000 That's a hard part.
02:02:09.000 I'll do it.
02:02:10.000 There's just a couple jokes that I'm like, I know they're funny, but it's like That's gonna be tough to tell publicly.
02:02:16.000 You had a couple jokes in there that were like, you can hear the reaction of like laughter or like, oh. 0.98
02:02:23.000 Yeah, and that's a fucking mothership crowd. 0.98
02:02:25.000 Yeah, exactly. 0.99
02:02:26.000 Exactly.
02:02:26.000 That's a bunch of people that are like, I paid good money to see somebody be racist tonight.
02:02:31.000 And they're like, bro, calm down.
02:02:35.000 It's hilarious. 0.97
02:02:36.000 The black jokes go hard. 0.98
02:02:37.000 The black jokes go hard. 1.00
02:02:38.000 They do. 1.00
02:02:39.000 But hey, you know, it's a rose.
02:02:41.000 This is what we want to see. 0.99
02:02:42.000 I know, but I got to go fucking first. 0.99
02:02:44.000 That's true. 0.98
02:02:45.000 Yeah, the MCing is tough because you haven't MCed in forever.
02:02:47.000 But is Kevin Hart going to be there?
02:02:50.000 I've never done anything.
02:02:50.000 How are you guys doing?
02:02:51.000 But like, when he's out, 100%.
02:02:53.000 He has to be there.
02:02:54.000 If he's laughing, you're golden.
02:02:56.000 He'll laugh.
02:02:57.000 Oh, he'll laugh at it. 1.00
02:02:58.000 Yeah, so the black jokes with the black guy laughing, you're good to go. 1.00
02:03:01.000 I'm not, it's more the. 1.00
02:03:01.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:03:04.000 Internet.
02:03:04.000 How are you guys doing?
02:03:05.000 The crowd.
02:03:07.000 Oh.
02:03:07.000 Because it's in LA.
02:03:08.000 I am going to be, it's going to be live, and I'm going to say some pretty offensive things.
02:03:11.000 And then I'm going to have to stay in the pocket of being like, I know the people at home like this.
02:03:16.000 But now an entire room of famous people don't like me.
02:03:16.000 Yes.
02:03:21.000 Dude, dude. 0.99
02:03:21.000 They're going to kill. 0.99
02:03:23.000 On paper, it sounds easy. 0.96
02:03:24.000 I get it.
02:03:24.000 I get it.
02:03:25.000 Bro, I know people in the WNBA, like people that work in, like, management and the players.
02:03:30.000 And I was going to war over your Espies thing.
02:03:34.000 What were they saying?
02:03:34.000 Yeah.
02:03:35.000 They were not happy with it at all.
02:03:37.000 Well, they seemed like a grumpy bunch anyway.
02:03:39.000 Yeah.
02:03:40.000 Not happy with it.
02:03:41.000 They go, you got to know you're playing for it.
02:03:42.000 And I was like, right, to me at home watching.
02:03:44.000 Yeah.
02:03:45.000 And they go, that's not worthy of the audience.
02:03:46.000 I'm like, no, you're in the room.
02:03:49.000 We're all at home laughing.
02:03:50.000 And we thought it was hilarious.
02:03:51.000 Like, she didn't even know this lady's name.
02:03:53.000 I was like, well, that's the point.
02:03:55.000 Neil Gillette.
02:03:56.000 But the Espies was a good training ground for this.
02:03:59.000 Espies is great.
02:03:59.000 I was nervous and awkward on that.
02:04:01.000 No, but they got 10 million views or whatever.
02:04:04.000 Anyway, it's for the internet.
02:04:05.000 Anyway, America. 1.00
02:04:07.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
02:04:08.000 Second Junk of Pub. 1.00
02:04:10.000 The motherfucking day. 0.99
02:04:12.000 What night is the roast? 0.99
02:04:13.000 Just so I don't see it.
02:04:14.000 Sunday.
02:04:15.000 Sunday. 1.00
02:04:16.000 Oh, fuck. 1.00
02:04:16.000 I'm going. 1.00
02:04:17.000 Where are you at? 1.00
02:04:17.000 Damn. 1.00
02:04:18.000 The first one. 0.99
02:04:18.000 I'm getting there Tuesday. 0.99
02:04:20.000 Why don't you go there early?
02:04:20.000 Oh, no.
02:04:22.000 What do you have?
02:04:23.000 I get there Sunday, and then.
02:04:24.000 It's the 10th.
02:04:25.000 It's the next Sunday.
02:04:26.000 Oh, okay.
02:04:26.000 All right.
02:04:26.000 Okay.
02:04:27.000 I think I have a gig.
02:04:27.000 You're going to stay?
02:04:30.000 Me and Lewis got matching Legion of Skanks outfits. 0.66
02:04:33.000 Oh, you're on the team now.
02:04:34.000 How's that going? 0.72
02:04:35.000 You're a member of the Legion of Skanks outfits.
02:04:37.000 Oh, this is with Jay.
02:04:38.000 Does this stop you from moving to the UK?
02:04:41.000 Unfortunately, it does.
02:04:42.000 Thank good.
02:04:42.000 Thank good.
02:04:43.000 Fuck those lions. 1.00
02:04:44.000 Not even unfortunately. 1.00
02:04:45.000 This is a massive opportunity for me creatively.
02:04:48.000 This is like a dream.
02:04:49.000 You've been going long. 1.00
02:04:50.000 Thank God for the fucking Mossad plant to get out of there. 1.00
02:04:53.000 The Mossad couple. 1.00
02:04:54.000 So I was like, ooh. 1.00
02:04:57.000 Yeah, maybe I'll stab you. 1.00
02:04:58.000 Yeah, you have to. 1.00
02:04:58.000 Yeah, it'll be fun. 1.00
02:04:59.000 Fuck going to England. 1.00
02:05:00.000 They're going to stab you anyway. 1.00
02:05:01.000 You left enough. 1.00
02:05:04.000 They'll stab you and steal your phone. 0.98
02:05:04.000 That's true. 0.98
02:05:06.000 They do get stabby over shoot.
02:05:07.000 Getting stabby would be. 1.00
02:05:08.000 Fucking blow, dude. 1.00
02:05:10.000 You suck. 1.00
02:05:11.000 You're right there with the guy, too. 1.00
02:05:12.000 At least a gunshot.
02:05:13.000 Gunshot could be like, where did it even come from?
02:05:14.000 Some distance.
02:05:15.000 He's like, I know.
02:05:16.000 It's you.
02:05:17.000 It's you. 1.00
02:05:17.000 I hate you. 1.00
02:05:18.000 Right. 1.00
02:05:20.000 Woof.
02:05:21.000 Yeah, anyway.
02:05:22.000 You're better off.
02:05:23.000 Yeah, you're better off.
02:05:24.000 I think it's good.
02:05:25.000 It's divine. 1.00
02:05:26.000 Well, nothing's better off than skanks. 1.00
02:05:28.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:05:29.000 What was it?
02:05:29.000 There you go.
02:05:30.000 15 years running?
02:05:32.000 Yeah.
02:05:32.000 It's just perfect for you, Ari.
02:05:34.000 It's my show.
02:05:35.000 England's not perfect for you.
02:05:36.000 Vice President?
02:05:36.000 Although it's weird seeing you tied down to something.
02:05:39.000 I've never seen you commit.
02:05:40.000 Yeah, you're going to commit.
02:05:42.000 We got to do it once a week.
02:05:43.000 When Shane and I ran for president and vice president, we'll get into another episode, but it was the log line until one of us betrays the other, until one of us double crosses the other one.
02:05:52.000 We didn't.
02:05:53.000 We didn't. 1.00
02:05:54.000 Only because you found out Lewis was going to fuck with me and you double crossed him. 1.00
02:05:58.000 Yes. 1.00
02:05:59.000 Of course.
02:05:59.000 Dude, that was nice.
02:06:00.000 I would never do that.
02:06:01.000 I'm not going to let my president go down like that.
02:06:03.000 I'm JD Vance, bro.
02:06:05.000 I'm Vance.
02:06:06.000 Underrated something that happened in COVID is Shane, we're like, We're making a.
02:06:12.000 You guys were making the biggest mistake comedically.
02:06:15.000 I was so mad.
02:06:16.000 There was a video going around of all these stars singing some like Beatles song.
02:06:21.000 Oh, yeah.
02:06:22.000 Imagine there's no heaven.
02:06:23.000 So, Lewis's idea was like, let's do something making fun of it.
02:06:27.000 We'll all sing a song.
02:06:29.000 It was Down with the Sickness.
02:06:31.000 And I was like, oh, I'll edit it.
02:06:31.000 And we'll make a video.
02:06:33.000 So we just got to sing it first.
02:06:35.000 But I need every single one of you to sing the full song.
02:06:37.000 And I can choose.
02:06:38.000 And then I'll pick. 1.00
02:06:39.000 And then I just have a full video of every single one of these dumbasses singing that song. 0.97
02:06:43.000 And I was like, first off, the idea was not funny. 1.00
02:06:45.000 That is gay. 1.00
02:06:46.000 I will not. 1.00
02:06:47.000 I was doing it as a favor to Lewis.
02:06:49.000 I was like, if you think this is good.
02:06:51.000 And then Shane called me and goes, how.
02:06:54.000 Bad will your retaliation be if I release your video?
02:06:57.000 I was like, dude.
02:06:59.000 I didn't put anyone's videos in.
02:07:00.000 I was like, bro, as a comedian, send it to Jay Bob.
02:07:03.000 As a comedian, you should do it.
02:07:04.000 I will scorch the earth to get that out. 0.99
02:07:06.000 Send Aries to Jamie right now. 1.00
02:07:08.000 I'll fuck with you. 1.00
02:07:09.000 Do you have it categorized? 1.00
02:07:10.000 Do you have it in a file?
02:07:12.000 And I kept trying to, like, it was hard to make sure they did it seriously. 0.99
02:07:17.000 So I was like, no, don't fuck around. 0.99
02:07:18.000 It would be funnier if you guys were, like, really singing the best you can. 1.00
02:07:22.000 You fucked around in yours. 1.00
02:07:24.000 I did. 1.00
02:07:24.000 Oh, thank God. 1.00
02:07:25.000 But, I mean, it's still a horrific and embarrassing video.
02:07:28.000 It's an embarrassing video.
02:07:29.000 That whole thing was so karaoke.
02:07:31.000 Imagine There's No Heaven while Granny just died of COVID.
02:07:35.000 Also, it's like, this is like, it's a war song. 0.90
02:07:39.000 Yeah.
02:07:40.000 It's a war and religion song.
02:07:41.000 Yeah, it was very.
02:07:42.000 What are we doing?
02:07:43.000 There was a very strange time where people just got into smelling their own farts.
02:07:48.000 Yeah.
02:07:49.000 Well, the COVID hidden actors had no juice anymore.
02:07:51.000 They were like, oh, we got to stand out.
02:07:53.000 Please don't.
02:07:54.000 Oh, my God.
02:07:55.000 This is the real one, the one that I imagine video.
02:07:57.000 I can't watch this.
02:07:58.000 Throwing it up for you guys. 0.99
02:07:59.000 Actors really made themselves worthless.
02:08:01.000 Do they have any trouble? 0.95
02:08:02.000 Yeah, I can't.
02:08:03.000 Okay, we can't sing it.
02:08:04.000 The Beatles are probably.
02:08:05.000 You get Sarah Silverman being all serious.
02:08:07.000 She's like, what stars are in this?
02:08:08.000 I'll do it.
02:08:09.000 Oh, she was being joked.
02:08:11.000 Who is that?
02:08:13.000 What's wrong with his teeth?
02:08:13.000 Timothy Chalamet.
02:08:15.000 Oh, Fallon.
02:08:16.000 Oh, Fallon.
02:08:17.000 Hey, Fallon.
02:08:18.000 He's an opener now.
02:08:21.000 You can kind of hear it. 1.00
02:08:22.000 Oh, fuck, man. 1.00
02:08:24.000 This is worse than being like an Epstein's iPhone clamp. 1.00
02:08:27.000 God, actors.
02:08:29.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:08:30.000 So fucking weird. 0.97
02:08:31.000 Well, they're not as important as they used to be. 0.97
02:08:33.000 So they're like, oh, this will be relevant.
02:08:34.000 They're about to do it.
02:08:35.000 They were like, I'm not getting attention.
02:08:36.000 Let's just do it ourselves.
02:08:37.000 And you're like, you guys can't do this.
02:08:39.000 The worst was the black and white one when they're like, I am ashamed of my whiteness. 0.96
02:08:43.000 Yeah.
02:08:44.000 That wasn't even a song.
02:08:46.000 That was just them talking. 1.00
02:08:47.000 The black and whiteness. 1.00
02:08:49.000 Doing the BLM. 1.00
02:08:50.000 Doing the BLM brides.
02:08:50.000 There's so many good ones.
02:08:52.000 You do.
02:08:53.000 It's so good.
02:08:53.000 DeRosa.
02:08:55.000 I got DeRosa going.
02:08:56.000 Send that to Jamie right now.
02:09:00.000 Send that to Jamie right now.
02:09:01.000 DeRosa will get sincere.
02:09:03.000 Dorosa gets in there, especially when he's drunk.
02:09:04.000 Dude, you're such a good friend. 0.99
02:09:05.000 I'm like, shut up, guys. 1.00
02:09:08.000 Shut up. 1.00
02:09:08.000 You're adopted. 1.00
02:09:09.000 Shut up. 1.00
02:09:09.000 I would never be friends with an adopted guy. 1.00
02:09:12.000 Yeah, you Egyptian weirdo. 1.00
02:09:13.000 Everybody was like trying to be silly, but the bit sucked so bad. 1.00
02:09:16.000 So bad. 1.00
02:09:17.000 I was so happy when you guys were doing that.
02:09:18.000 I was at Stanhope's when this was going on.
02:09:20.000 I didn't even get the bit, dude.
02:09:20.000 Oh, my God.
02:09:21.000 I was drunk at Stanhope's. 1.00
02:09:22.000 I was like, you guys suck. 1.00
02:09:24.000 You killed us. 1.00
02:09:25.000 Me and Stanhope were hammered. 1.00
02:09:27.000 You killed us. 1.00
02:09:28.000 Look how much these dudes suck. 1.00
02:09:32.000 That shit blew, dude. 1.00
02:09:34.000 I can't believe you guys did that. 1.00
02:09:35.000 How much you got left in there?
02:09:36.000 It's such a weird thing to do.
02:09:37.000 The thing where people decide to do things to make themselves look like they care.
02:09:41.000 Look like they care.
02:09:42.000 Yeah.
02:09:42.000 That's the thing about Hollywood.
02:09:43.000 They want to look like they care. 0.99
02:09:45.000 And it's so fucking transparent. 0.99
02:09:47.000 That's always a bummer. 0.95
02:09:48.000 You get that text like, hey, can you make a video for this?
02:09:50.000 I'm like, ah, it's going to ruin my whole day because you have to think about it and spend time on it.
02:09:55.000 Yeah.
02:09:55.000 It's a nightmare.
02:09:56.000 Change your number.
02:09:57.000 Yeah.
02:09:58.000 Can you help me with this?
02:09:59.000 You get one or two of those, change your number.
02:10:01.000 There we go.
02:10:02.000 JoJo Rabbit.
02:10:04.000 Music, please.
02:10:04.000 Music, please.
02:10:06.000 Oh, it's gonna be cold.
02:10:08.000 Woo, he's back, baby.
02:10:11.000 Ibogaine.
02:10:12.000 The Ibogaine.
02:10:13.000 Ibogaine.
02:10:14.000 IBMA.
02:10:15.000 Mushroom.
02:10:15.000 Yeah, congrats on the Ibogaine, bro.
02:10:18.000 Dude, that is such a win.
02:10:18.000 That's sick.
02:10:20.000 That is such a gigantic win.
02:10:22.000 They're hoping to reschedule.
02:10:23.000 They're going to reschedule the psychedelics and have them available to people.
02:10:26.000 Woo!
02:10:27.000 What's interesting is that all this was done during the Nixon administration to squash the civil rights movement.
02:10:32.000 The civil rights movement and the anti war movement.
02:10:32.000 What?
02:10:34.000 Black people don't even like mushrooms. 1.00
02:10:36.000 And that was also one of the things that I got to say. 0.99
02:10:38.000 It's one of the things that I got to say during the whole Trump thing. 0.98
02:10:41.000 You said black people don't like mushrooms? 0.97
02:10:43.000 I said, no, I didn't say that. 0.99
02:10:45.000 Okay. 1.00
02:10:45.000 Black people don't like mushrooms. 1.00
02:10:47.000 I said they love certain foods, but you can't bring them up. 0.98
02:10:51.000 I said these things weren't made illegal.
02:10:54.000 It was like, Because it was all live.
02:10:55.000 They couldn't stop me from saying it.
02:10:57.000 And Trump just let me talk.
02:10:58.000 So I said, these aren't illegal because they're harmful.
02:11:01.000 They're illegal because of the sweeping Controlled Substances Act of the 1970s and the Richard Nixon administration to target the civil rights movement and the anti war movement.
02:11:10.000 That's why they made them illegal.
02:11:12.000 They're not illegal because they're harmful.
02:11:14.000 And the idea that they were Schedule I for all these years with so many people using them to quit smoking, to quit drinking, to quit drugs, to get their life together, to like relax before they're dying like so many people that are like, Filled with anxiety because they're dying of cancer, they take mushrooms and they're like, I think I'm going to be okay. 0.80
02:11:30.000 Can you get fucked up on Ibogaine?
02:11:32.000 No, it's not recreational at all. 0.99
02:11:34.000 Oh, it's bad.
02:11:35.000 It's a bad experience.
02:11:37.000 What?
02:11:37.000 Yeah, it's not like a fun time.
02:11:38.000 But it's neuroregenerative.
02:11:41.000 It helps people that have, like Rick Perry, the governor, he had some sort of natural atrophy of his brain that happens when you get older.
02:11:49.000 Within six weeks or so after doing it, 25% of the atrophy was gone.
02:11:54.000 Six months later, 100% of it was gone.
02:11:57.000 Yes.
02:11:57.000 What?
02:11:58.000 It's nuts.
02:11:59.000 It's very positive, but a bad feeling when you're doing it.
02:12:03.000 Who is this?
02:12:03.000 Interesting.
02:12:04.000 Rick Perry.
02:12:05.000 Rick Perry, the former governor of Texas, Republican governor, who is a staunch anti drug guy his whole life.
02:12:11.000 And then he talked to all these veterans that were using it to get off of whatever opiates they were on.
02:12:16.000 Let me try it?
02:12:17.000 Yeah.
02:12:17.000 In secret?
02:12:18.000 Let me try it in secret?
02:12:19.000 I don't know if it was let me try it in secret because he was open about talking about it.
02:12:23.000 And he did it.
02:12:23.000 Oh, wow.
02:12:24.000 And he said it changed his life, too.
02:12:26.000 And he says, This is my life now.
02:12:27.000 I'm dedicated to trying to make this stuff legal.
02:12:30.000 So it's kind of like Ozempic.
02:12:31.000 It makes you stop doing stuff.
02:12:33.000 Well, Zempic is weird because it does make you stop doing addictive things, too.
02:12:37.000 But it cuts down your sex drive, too.
02:12:37.000 It does.
02:12:39.000 It cuts down love.
02:12:40.000 Like, you don't get excited about stuff.
02:12:42.000 Oh, yeah.
02:12:43.000 People are saying it keeps you from being passionate about stuff.
02:12:45.000 It cuts down love.
02:12:46.000 It's just weird when you see.
02:12:48.000 We were talking about that lady. 1.00
02:12:49.000 Some of these hot actresses that are doing it, and they don't need to do it. 1.00
02:12:49.000 Oh, gosh. 1.00
02:12:52.000 Stop drinking. 1.00
02:12:53.000 Be fat and horny. 1.00
02:12:55.000 Be fat and horny. 1.00
02:12:56.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:12:57.000 That's a good radio team. 0.97
02:12:58.000 Fat and horny in the morning. 1.00
02:12:59.000 It's also, girls don't realize, like, a little bit of fat on them is hot. 1.00
02:13:04.000 Little jiggle. 1.00
02:13:04.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:13:05.000 When girls are like 10 pounds overweight, it's like when they think they're overweight. 1.00
02:13:10.000 Especially if they're confident with it. 0.98
02:13:10.000 Yeah. 0.98
02:13:12.000 It just gives them curves. 0.68
02:13:14.000 Rachel Ray. 0.99
02:13:16.000 When they lose all that weight and get that Ozempic face, it's like, what are you doing? 1.00
02:13:19.000 Pull up Olivia Wilde. 1.00
02:13:20.000 You see her? 1.00
02:13:21.000 She looks like a chick-tailed lemur. 0.90
02:13:22.000 That's what we were drinking before you got here. 0.99
02:13:24.000 Oh, man. 1.00
02:13:25.000 Pull up her and a lemur. 0.92
02:13:27.000 It's dead on the eyes. 0.97
02:13:28.000 It's dead on.
02:13:29.000 Who's Olivia Wilde?
02:13:30.000 She's really beautiful.
02:13:32.000 Gorgeous. 1.00
02:13:34.000 She's so fat. 0.96
02:13:35.000 She wasn't fat at all, man. 0.78
02:13:37.000 But she's been. 1.00
02:13:38.000 Look how hot. 1.00
02:13:38.000 Look how hot. 1.00
02:13:39.000 But now look at the most recent video of her. 0.96
02:13:39.000 Gorgeous. 0.96
02:13:42.000 Yeah, look at that.
02:13:44.000 Oh, now pull up a ringtail lemur if you can find one.
02:13:46.000 I know exactly what a lemur looks like, bro.
02:13:48.000 It's a cute little nugget.
02:13:51.000 Look at that.
02:13:54.000 Same eyes. 0.67
02:13:55.000 Wait, what happened to her?
02:13:55.000 Same eyes.
02:13:56.000 Did she just hit the wall?
02:13:58.000 No, there's no way she just hit the wall.
02:14:00.000 She's still fairly young.
02:14:01.000 How old is she? 1.00
02:14:02.000 And she was really hot. 1.00
02:14:03.000 She was on some. 0.99
02:14:05.000 42.
02:14:05.000 She was in house in 2007.
02:14:07.000 She's older. 0.82
02:14:08.000 She's 20 years older than she was in house. 1.00
02:14:09.000 Yeah, but dude, recently she looked really hot. 1.00
02:14:12.000 Also, she's gorgeous. 1.00
02:14:14.000 Gorgeous.
02:14:15.000 No, I don't think it's the wall, dude. 0.76
02:14:16.000 Her real name's Cockburn.
02:14:18.000 That's funny.
02:14:18.000 Okay, but does anybody know if she's taking that stuff?
02:14:22.000 That's not even Ozempic.
02:14:23.000 That's the eyes.
02:14:24.000 That's a different thing.
02:14:25.000 Look at the giant eyeballs. 1.00
02:14:28.000 She might be Ozempic. 1.00
02:14:29.000 I don't want to smirch the lady. 1.00
02:14:32.000 She's still a fucking Ozempic. 1.00
02:14:33.000 You'd still fuck her collab with her. 1.00
02:14:35.000 But I think it's a little bit of it is just like women have this thing where they think they're supposed to be skinny. 1.00
02:14:42.000 Oh, 42. 1.00
02:14:42.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:14:43.000 Well, they are.
02:14:44.000 Yeah, but dude, 42. 1.00
02:14:45.000 Look at fucking, what's her name? 1.00
02:14:48.000 Jennifer Lopez. 1.00
02:14:49.000 Look at outliers. 0.91
02:14:49.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.91
02:14:50.000 She's hot as fuck. 1.00
02:14:51.000 I mean, that's a Puerto Rican, though. 1.00
02:14:52.000 Yeah, look at LeBron, but everybody else, it goes out at 38. 0.87
02:14:55.000 Hmm.
02:14:56.000 Could you hand me one of those brewskis?
02:14:58.000 Absolutely, buddy.
02:14:58.000 What are you looking for?
02:15:00.000 Yay, bottle rods.
02:15:00.000 A bottle.
02:15:02.000 It's just sad that so many of these women think that they have to be waistless. 1.00
02:15:06.000 Sessient holidays. 1.00
02:15:06.000 Look at that. 1.00
02:15:08.000 That's genuine.
02:15:09.000 I think it's just a bad picture, bad night, or something.
02:15:11.000 Yeah, bad night.
02:15:12.000 That's this story?
02:15:13.000 I thought that was a great picture.
02:15:14.000 She's still beautiful. 0.99
02:15:15.000 And she doesn't even look remotely overweight.
02:15:17.000 Dude, Seth Rogen looks like a troll next to her.
02:15:19.000 That's from two weeks ago.
02:15:21.000 Two weeks?
02:15:22.000 Wow.
02:15:22.000 No, that's just bad.
02:15:23.000 She's fine.
02:15:24.000 She might have been just bad video.
02:15:26.000 Let's leave.
02:15:29.000 Lady, I was wrong.
02:15:30.000 You didn't hit the wall at all. 0.90
02:15:32.000 You know what I like is the big fat guys that need the Ozempic.
02:15:35.000 Need it.
02:15:36.000 Yeah.
02:15:36.000 I like that.
02:15:37.000 My friend, he's on the fat pill.
02:15:39.000 Some of them defeat it.
02:15:40.000 Yeah, I know a guy.
02:15:41.000 We know a guy.
02:15:42.000 Boy, I didn't want to say his name.
02:15:43.000 Boy plowed right through it. 0.99
02:15:44.000 He beat Ozempic. 0.99
02:15:45.000 How did he do that? 0.85
02:15:46.000 He keeps eating.
02:15:47.000 He has habits.
02:15:48.000 Dude, when we were doing the 999, we were three hot dogs in.
02:15:53.000 We had to eat nine hot dogs, nine beers, and nine innings.
02:15:55.000 And by the way, pitch clock.
02:15:57.000 So it's way harder than when it was invented.
02:15:58.000 Although we did get there early.
02:15:59.000 We got there.
02:16:00.000 O'Connor had seven hot dogs before.
02:16:02.000 For the national anthem.
02:16:05.000 Oh, Connor, I'm going to just chug these hot dogs, chug hot dogs, passed out till the sixth.
02:16:11.000 He woke up and said, I'm going to wake him up in the night to be like, dude, you're doing away.
02:16:11.000 He passed.
02:16:14.000 You got to get it.
02:16:15.000 He got it.
02:16:18.000 He was like, I'm a champion.
02:16:19.000 It's the bread, the salt gets you. 0.97
02:16:21.000 That's disgusting.
02:16:22.000 Yeah, but H. Foley, three hot dogs in, you look over, he's eating a cheesesteak. 0.67
02:16:26.000 He's getting other grub.
02:16:28.000 He's eating hot dogs.
02:16:29.000 What are you doing? 0.98
02:16:30.000 And he goes, I don't know, Zimbabwe. 0.55
02:16:32.000 I don't even think I'll win. 0.99
02:16:33.000 I don't care. 0.99
02:16:34.000 I don't fucking care. 0.99
02:16:35.000 How full I am. 1.00
02:16:37.000 If you put a cheesesteak in front of me, I'm eating that shit. 1.00
02:16:39.000 It's like pussy. 1.00
02:16:40.000 There's a new place in Austin. 1.00
02:16:42.000 There's a food truck that Tony turned me out to that has cheesesteaks.
02:16:45.000 They're full.
02:16:46.000 James has had one on Banana.
02:16:48.000 What is that place, Jamie?
02:16:49.000 Do you know the place?
02:16:50.000 Do you know what it is, Jamie?
02:16:51.000 We'll never get in again.
02:16:51.000 Don't say it.
02:16:53.000 What's that?
02:16:53.000 No, not at all.
02:16:54.000 I'll ask Tony.
02:16:55.000 I think I saw it on Seamless.
02:16:57.000 I almost got it.
02:16:58.000 It's so legit.
02:16:59.000 Is it on 6th Street? 0.91
02:17:00.000 Because the food sucks over there. 0.99
02:17:02.000 Food sucks on 6th. 0.99
02:17:03.000 You got to go off. 0.97
02:17:04.000 It's a weird spot because it used to be the dirty 6th.
02:17:07.000 It was all just like, Drunk people food.
02:17:09.000 It's still.
02:17:09.000 They didn't have to be good.
02:17:10.000 It's still.
02:17:10.000 It's getting worse, dude.
02:17:12.000 But you got Black Rabbit, that's it.
02:17:14.000 But there's a Fogo de Chao a block away. 0.62
02:17:16.000 I think it might be RBs.
02:17:17.000 There's a Fogo de Chao a block away from the club.
02:17:19.000 Where?
02:17:20.000 It's down the street.
02:17:21.000 It's on Congress.
02:17:24.000 Or third.
02:17:25.000 What is?
02:17:25.000 I've never seen it.
02:17:26.000 Fogo?
02:17:27.000 It's on Congress.
02:17:28.000 So it's two blocks away.
02:17:29.000 Yeah, but it's not 36.
02:17:30.000 It's way off.
02:17:31.000 Right, right.
02:17:32.000 But it's not far, RBs.
02:17:33.000 It's still downtown.
02:17:34.000 I get what you're saying.
02:17:35.000 It's still downtown.
02:17:35.000 These are the guys.
02:17:36.000 These are the guys.
02:17:37.000 I'm going there tonight.
02:17:38.000 What's the name of it?
02:17:40.000 RB's Steak and Fries.
02:17:41.000 RB's Steak and Fries. 1.00
02:17:43.000 Bro, I'm telling you, their fucking cheesesteaks are so legit. 0.99
02:17:47.000 Let's meet them for others. 0.99
02:17:47.000 These guys brought them to the club, and I was like, and Tony's like, dude, you got to try this. 0.99
02:17:53.000 I was like, I'm not really hungry, but let me.
02:17:55.000 I started one bite, and I scarfed it.
02:17:58.000 I scarfed it. 0.99
02:17:59.000 Ooh, they got the fucking sauteed onions. 0.99
02:18:00.000 Oh, it's so good, dude. 0.99
02:18:02.000 Oh, it's so good.
02:18:03.000 These guys are so, and they're cool dudes.
02:18:06.000 Very, very, very legit.
02:18:07.000 I want to see his nickname?
02:18:07.000 Wait, go back up.
02:18:09.000 Boo. 1.00
02:18:09.000 Boo. 1.00
02:18:11.000 Black guys rule. 1.00
02:18:13.000 Boo Radley. 1.00
02:18:15.000 Man, it's almost time for Jeremiah Love highlights.
02:18:19.000 Easy.
02:18:19.000 It's almost time, dude.
02:18:20.000 Jeremiah Love?
02:18:22.000 Who that is?
02:18:23.000 I love that you're asking.
02:18:24.000 Who that is?
02:18:25.000 What are we talking about here?
02:18:26.000 Is that politics?
02:18:27.000 No.
02:18:28.000 No.
02:18:28.000 Football?
02:18:29.000 It sounds like a running back.
02:18:30.000 Jeremiah Love sounds like a football player.
02:18:32.000 He certainly is.
02:18:32.000 Yeah.
02:18:33.000 Yeah.
02:18:34.000 If he was a fighter, he'd probably quit in the third round.
02:18:36.000 I don't know if he.
02:18:37.000 Like a guy with that name?
02:18:38.000 If he had autism, or I think he does.
02:18:41.000 He's got at least OCD, but they did a nice doc.
02:18:44.000 Like before the game, they always, like college game day, always runs like a heartwarming story, but he had like autism as a kid, and they were like, We don't know what to do. 0.99
02:18:53.000 And then we got him in football, and he was just a fucking animal. 0.99
02:18:57.000 Oh, wow. 1.00
02:18:58.000 He's just.
02:18:59.000 That's so funny.
02:19:00.000 Wow, look at him go.
02:19:01.000 Wow.
02:19:02.000 Looking at his own sideline.
02:19:04.000 Dude, autism is a superpower.
02:19:05.000 Well, you just got to channel it. 0.98
02:19:07.000 You got to, like, tell me about it.
02:19:08.000 You got to make this one.
02:19:10.000 Norman, talk, speak on it.
02:19:11.000 You got to find a piano or comedy.
02:19:14.000 I can speak about Neanderthal genes.
02:19:15.000 You can speak about autism.
02:19:16.000 These guys are tackling wrong.
02:19:18.000 Look at him go, dude.
02:19:19.000 Wow.
02:19:20.000 Imagine trying to catch a guy that runs out of the way.
02:19:21.000 Wait till you see him jumping over people.
02:19:23.000 These guys are tackling wrong.
02:19:24.000 Oh, my God. 1.00
02:19:24.000 He's like the correspondence shooter. 1.00
02:19:26.000 Hey, Jamie, who is that guy that they just signed from Africa? 1.00
02:19:29.000 He's a 21 year old guy who's never played football before.
02:19:31.000 Philly did.
02:19:32.000 Philly did.
02:19:33.000 Yeah, he's with the Eagles.
02:19:35.000 Football does that where you're like, as long as you've got the skills, we got you.
02:19:39.000 That was a nice move.
02:19:40.000 Just keep this rolling for a second. 0.99
02:19:41.000 Oh, look at that move. 0.98
02:19:42.000 What a move.
02:19:43.000 Oh, my goodness.
02:19:44.000 All they got to do to tackle him is look him directly in the eyes.
02:19:47.000 Oh, why? 1.00
02:19:48.000 Because autism hates that shit. 1.00
02:19:50.000 They don't let you ever do that. 1.00
02:19:51.000 Really?
02:19:51.000 Is that real?
02:19:52.000 You look at an autistic guy in the eyes and go, fuck it. 1.00
02:19:53.000 He won't look at you back, though. 1.00
02:19:55.000 It's not going to work if he doesn't look at you back.
02:19:57.000 He's just dodging off.
02:19:58.000 Do you hate hugs?
02:19:59.000 He's dodging a hug.
02:20:00.000 I hate a hug.
02:20:01.000 Bro, he's.
02:20:02.000 Get away from Joe.
02:20:03.000 Get him. 1.00
02:20:05.000 Take him down. 0.92
02:20:07.000 Oh, God.
02:20:08.000 Oh, I'm right in the lips.
02:20:10.000 He got tongue in there for the listeners.
02:20:13.000 That's assault, brother.
02:20:14.000 Get a hug.
02:20:15.000 You should sue Joe.
02:20:16.000 I might sue Joe.
02:20:17.000 His whole body was vibrating when I was hugging him.
02:20:22.000 Good lord.
02:20:23.000 I mean, that's hot to say.
02:20:25.000 How sick is Joe?
02:20:25.000 Oh, man.
02:20:26.000 I love a great athlete.
02:20:28.000 Show Joe him jumping over some people.
02:20:29.000 Hey, what are you boys doing next weekend?
02:20:32.000 I think I got a gig.
02:20:33.000 What do you got?
02:20:34.000 Next week is a roast.
02:20:36.000 Next Saturday.
02:20:36.000 Oh, yeah.
02:20:37.000 It's at Netflix Fest.
02:20:38.000 In Boston.
02:20:38.000 It's at TV Garden.
02:20:40.000 What are you doing?
02:20:41.000 UFC.
02:20:42.000 The UFC in New Jersey.
02:20:43.000 Sean Strickland and Hamza Chamaev.
02:20:46.000 Hamza's. 0.53
02:20:47.000 Woo! 0.83
02:20:48.000 Bro, they're not even going to have a face off. 0.99
02:20:50.000 They're worried about putting them close to each other because Sean has talked so much shit. 1.00
02:20:55.000 He's a wild dude. 1.00
02:20:56.000 He's a wild dude. 1.00
02:20:57.000 And that shit talking that he does is emotional warfare. 1.00
02:21:02.000 Because, like, you'll think about the shit. 1.00
02:21:03.000 He calls him a goat fucker. 1.00
02:21:05.000 He's like, he won't stop talking shit. 1.00
02:21:08.000 He has no filter. 1.00
02:21:09.000 Sean Strickland said that. 1.00
02:21:11.000 He said, if those three goat fucks, if he comes up to me with three of his Chechen goats, he said, Sean was like, I'll shoot them. 1.00
02:21:19.000 I'll shoot all three of them. 1.00
02:21:19.000 I'll pull out my gun. 1.00
02:21:20.000 And he's going like this boom, boom, boom.
02:21:22.000 Jesus. 1.00
02:21:22.000 He's talking so much shit. 1.00
02:21:25.000 But it's emotional warfare. 1.00
02:21:27.000 It's like what Connor used to do. 1.00
02:21:29.000 What Connor did with Jose Aldo, he had him so fucked. 0.98
02:21:32.000 Up before that fight. 0.98
02:21:33.000 And he was just like so emotional.
02:21:33.000 Yeah.
02:21:35.000 Because Aldo was a legend. 0.94
02:21:37.000 Nobody talked shit about him. 0.94
02:21:39.000 Everybody was terrified of him. 1.00
02:21:40.000 And Connor was just constantly talking shit about him. 0.99
02:21:43.000 It worked. 0.99
02:21:44.000 Stole his belt at a press conference and was holding it up.
02:21:48.000 And by the time the fight happened, Aldo was just so worked up.
02:21:51.000 And Connor was just like super relaxed and smiling.
02:21:55.000 That's how Roberto Duran beat Robinson.
02:21:57.000 Because he called his wife a horror bus.
02:21:58.000 Who's Robinson?
02:21:59.000 Sugar Ray.
02:22:01.000 No.
02:22:01.000 Leonard.
02:22:02.000 Sorry.
02:22:02.000 Wrong sugar.
02:22:02.000 Leonard.
02:22:03.000 How dare you.
02:22:04.000 It was a really bad band.
02:22:05.000 He talked Sugar Ray into fighting his kind of fight.
02:22:09.000 Do you think Strickland can do that?
02:22:11.000 No.
02:22:11.000 Strickland is a.
02:22:12.000 He's good.
02:22:13.000 But he's not a good fighter.
02:22:14.000 No, no, no.
02:22:15.000 Strickland is one of the best fighters on planet Earth.
02:22:18.000 Make no mistake about it.
02:22:19.000 So is Hamza.
02:22:20.000 But Strickland is also a legitimate world champion.
02:22:23.000 He's a guy who's accustomed to five rounders.
02:22:25.000 He's got phenomenal cardio.
02:22:27.000 He's one of the hardest guys to hit in the sport.
02:22:30.000 Can he?
02:22:31.000 100% he has a chance.
02:22:33.000 Underrated grappling.
02:22:34.000 I like grappling.
02:22:35.000 Listen to me as an expert, allegedly.
02:22:40.000 He's one of the best takedown defense in the game.
02:22:42.000 Underrated grappling.
02:22:43.000 Strickland has a legit chance.
02:22:44.000 Can I just say this?
02:22:46.000 As someone who's heard you talk about this kind of stuff for many, many years, You give it up more for the person you think is not going to win.
02:22:55.000 Oh.
02:22:56.000 Interesting. 0.98
02:22:56.000 Because you didn't say shit about Hamza in this. 0.98
02:22:58.000 You just said shit about Hamza. 0.99
02:22:59.000 No, no, no. 1.00
02:23:00.000 I will tell you a lot about Hamza.
02:23:01.000 It's unreal.
02:23:02.000 So you go, but don't count out the underdog.
02:23:02.000 It's obvious.
02:23:05.000 No, I'll say that eventually if you give me a chance, you fucking blabber around. 1.00
02:23:08.000 You stop talking. 0.99
02:23:09.000 You stopped.
02:23:09.000 Jesus.
02:23:11.000 You already made your point.
02:23:14.000 No, Hamza 100% can win.
02:23:14.000 Jesus Christ.
02:23:15.000 He, look, he dominated Drekist Duplessis like he didn't even belong in there with him.
02:23:18.000 Exactly.
02:23:19.000 And Drekist was the world champion.
02:23:21.000 And Drikas had beaten Sean Strickland.
02:23:23.000 But the last time he beat Strickland in the second fight, Strickland, they made him fight.
02:23:27.000 He had a shoulder injury.
02:23:28.000 Like, Strickland's a wild boy. 0.99
02:23:30.000 And he crashed his dirt bike and fucked his shoulder up. 0.99
02:23:34.000 Cool. 0.99
02:23:35.000 Cool.
02:23:35.000 Strickland's an animal.
02:23:37.000 And they allowed him, I mean, they forced him, I should say, to fight.
02:23:41.000 Plus 340. 0.99
02:23:42.000 Damn. 0.99
02:23:43.000 Listen, man, I'm telling you, he can win. 1.00
02:23:45.000 Not only did he beat out Asanya, but the guy does not get tired. 0.98
02:23:49.000 Strickland has some of the best fucking cardio in the sport. 0.97
02:23:51.000 He's one of the hardest guys to hit. 0.98
02:23:53.000 He's very clever with his boxing.
02:23:55.000 He's got one of the best jabs in the sport.
02:23:57.000 Strickland can win this fight.
02:23:59.000 All right.
02:23:59.000 It's not saying he's going to win.
02:24:01.000 Hamzad is the best grappler at 185, period.
02:24:04.000 If he gets him on the ground, he's going to win. 0.98
02:24:06.000 And Hamzad can fucking strike, too. 0.99
02:24:07.000 It's not just a grappler, he's an animal. 1.00
02:24:09.000 Well, I mean, that's what I mean with the shit talk. 1.00
02:24:11.000 Maybe he's trying to talk him into standing. 0.99
02:24:13.000 Right.
02:24:14.000 Or talk him into a war or talk him into hitting the gas, full clip, trying to take.
02:24:20.000 Algemain Sterling did a video about this.
02:24:22.000 And Algemain said here's the thing if Hamzad tries to just run him over.
02:24:27.000 Tries to just take him down, run him over, submit him, and can't do it, then that's a problem.
02:24:33.000 Because then he gasses himself out in the first round.
02:24:35.000 This is a five round fight.
02:24:37.000 Strickland is notoriously durable, notoriously in incredible shape, and he's calm.
02:24:43.000 He knows how to fight in wars.
02:24:45.000 Like, he's accustomed to that.
02:24:48.000 You know, he had a very abusive childhood.
02:24:50.000 He doesn't like bullies.
02:24:51.000 Like, Strickland's a tough nut, dude.
02:24:54.000 In my mind, this is like, I would give Hans on a baby.
02:24:54.000 Oh, yeah.
02:24:57.000 You're going to fire me up.
02:24:58.000 Yeah, dude, this is a great fight, dude. 1.00
02:25:00.000 Have you heard his trans race? 1.00
02:25:01.000 This is one. 1.00
02:25:03.000 Strickland is the best at fucking just talking wild shit at press conferences. 1.00
02:25:07.000 Yeah, yeah. 1.00
02:25:09.000 He's a wild fellow.
02:25:10.000 He was on the podcast, too.
02:25:10.000 Yeah.
02:25:11.000 He's fun, man.
02:25:12.000 He's fun. 0.99
02:25:13.000 He gets so angry and worked up about shit, but he's fucking fun. 0.99
02:25:13.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:25:15.000 You know what's fun?
02:25:17.000 Like now, a back?
02:25:18.000 Fun whites. 0.98
02:25:20.000 Fun whites are coming back. 1.00
02:25:21.000 He's one of the funnest whites ever.
02:25:23.000 I blame Chet Hanks. 1.00
02:25:25.000 Chet Hanks.
02:25:25.000 He broke it open.
02:25:26.000 Yeah, white boy summer. 0.95
02:25:28.000 Who actually broke the whites? 0.65
02:25:29.000 He's got a new accent?
02:25:30.000 He broke the highman.
02:25:31.000 What's his new one?
02:25:32.000 He dropped his old one.
02:25:32.000 I don't know.
02:25:33.000 He was like, I'm done with that fakeness.
02:25:34.000 I got a new fakeness.
02:25:35.000 Can you imagine if it was Tom Hanks as your dad?
02:25:37.000 That's wild.
02:25:38.000 You got a little bit of a shadow.
02:25:40.000 Colin and Chet, they couldn't be more opposite.
02:25:42.000 Who's Colin?
02:25:43.000 Colin's his other son.
02:25:43.000 You've seen he's in a ton of movies.
02:25:45.000 Colin's less of a phony.
02:25:46.000 Well, he's more straight laced.
02:25:48.000 Yeah.
02:25:50.000 What, Shia LaBouffe?
02:25:51.000 He's getting drunk, going to jail, coming back out.
02:25:53.000 Is Shia LaBouffe famous?
02:25:55.000 No, I'm just saying, like, Wild Lights.
02:26:00.000 Colin looks just like Tom.
02:26:02.000 That's crazy.
02:26:03.000 He needs to be Forrest Gump, too.
02:26:04.000 Good actor.
02:26:05.000 He looks more Forrest Gumpy than Forrest Gump.
02:26:07.000 He looks more Philadelphia.
02:26:08.000 What is this? 0.51
02:26:10.000 Oh, he's singing now?
02:26:10.000 Chad is singing.
02:26:11.000 He's doing country music.
02:26:12.000 Oh, boy.
02:26:13.000 Oh, God.
02:26:14.000 I thought he was a rapper.
02:26:14.000 He can't sing.
02:26:15.000 He was, but country's big now. 1.00
02:26:17.000 He's just swinging it every fucking bit. 0.98
02:26:18.000 He just chose wherever it's popular. 0.99
02:26:20.000 Renaissance. 0.91
02:26:21.000 He doesn't suck. 1.00
02:26:22.000 That guy sucks. 1.00
02:26:23.000 Catch Jack. 1.00
02:26:23.000 Yo. 1.00
02:26:24.000 What?
02:26:25.000 He's great.
02:26:26.000 Chet Hanks making accents.
02:26:27.000 Are he cajoled?
02:26:28.000 Imagine what it's like having Tom Hanks as a dad and trying to find your own identity. 0.75
02:26:33.000 I'm sure it's tough if your father was a molester, but it doesn't matter if she's a molestation. 0.94
02:26:40.000 Oh! 0.92
02:26:41.000 Come on. 1.00
02:26:41.000 You're talking about fucking J Mo's. 1.00
02:26:43.000 J Mo's getting the timestamp. 1.00
02:26:45.000 How dare you?
02:26:46.000 Talk about Woody here.
02:26:47.000 Tom Hanks. 1.00
02:26:47.000 J Mo's. 1.00
02:26:48.000 J Mo just goes. 0.95
02:26:50.000 He was good in Atlanta, and that's about it.
02:26:54.000 Atlanta?
02:26:55.000 Philadelphia?
02:26:56.000 Did an episode of Atlanta.
02:26:57.000 He was good.
02:26:57.000 Oh.
02:26:58.000 Oh.
02:26:59.000 Which one?
02:27:00.000 Chet.
02:27:01.000 Chet rules.
02:27:02.000 He was also great in Curb.
02:27:04.000 Yes.
02:27:04.000 Played the soldier.
02:27:05.000 That's right.
02:27:06.000 I didn't see that one.
02:27:07.000 You want to talk great athletes? 0.94
02:27:08.000 What about the amputee cornhole guy? 0.84
02:27:12.000 What? 0.93
02:27:12.000 What? 0.93
02:27:13.000 Where did that come from?
02:27:14.000 You haven't seen this guy? 0.99
02:27:15.000 What kind of a fucking transition was that? 0.99
02:27:18.000 I know where he's going with it. 0.99
02:27:19.000 We're talking about athletes.
02:27:20.000 The guy got in.
02:27:21.000 Trouble for shooting someone.
02:27:22.000 He's got no arms, no legs. 0.95
02:27:25.000 He shot a guy.
02:27:27.000 Did he really shoot somebody? 1.00
02:27:28.000 With a nub. 0.93
02:27:29.000 100% he shot him. 0.88
02:27:30.000 Pull it up.
02:27:30.000 What's Cornhole?
02:27:31.000 I thought he was playing Cornhole.
02:27:32.000 What does he have to do?
02:27:33.000 Does he have to attach a stick to the nub so he can pull the trigger?
02:27:35.000 He's got a little tiny thumb right on the stump.
02:27:39.000 And he could trigger it. 0.98
02:27:40.000 And he pulled a trigger and killed a guy. 0.98
02:27:41.000 Whoa.
02:27:42.000 Why did he kill the guy?
02:27:42.000 Yeah.
02:27:43.000 I think he fucked his stump. 1.00
02:27:44.000 I don't know. 1.00
02:27:45.000 What happened?
02:27:46.000 I remember reading the story.
02:27:48.000 He was driving the car, too.
02:27:49.000 There were three other guys in the car, and he's the one driving it.
02:27:51.000 Oh, my God.
02:27:52.000 Stump drove the car?
02:27:52.000 What an outfit!
02:27:54.000 Yeah.
02:27:54.000 Wow.
02:27:54.000 This guy's a badass.
02:27:55.000 Let's sit down a straight road.
02:27:56.000 And he was a professional cornhole player?
02:27:58.000 He was number one.
02:27:59.000 Cornhole.
02:27:59.000 No.
02:28:00.000 Was he the bag?
02:28:01.000 Here's a video of him shooting a gun.
02:28:02.000 There's a video of him climbing a ladder.
02:28:04.000 Climbing a ladder!
02:28:05.000 Yeah, I'll show you that after this.
02:28:06.000 He's getting passed around in prison like a cornhole bag.
02:28:09.000 Won on suspicion of shooting and killing a pastor in his car during an argument. 0.84
02:28:13.000 Look at this badass. 0.99
02:28:14.000 Oh, he can shoot guns. 0.98
02:28:15.000 I mean, he can shoot well. 0.82
02:28:16.000 You got to hand it to him.
02:28:17.000 Well.
02:28:18.000 Okay.
02:28:19.000 You got that leg to stand on there, Mark.
02:28:19.000 Maybe if you're.
02:28:21.000 Less limbs.
02:28:22.000 Yeah, less limbs.
02:28:23.000 Less movement.
02:28:24.000 It's not this end.
02:28:25.000 It's just this.
02:28:25.000 It's more stable.
02:28:27.000 I went out on a limb. 1.00
02:28:28.000 Oh, you son of a bitch. 1.00
02:28:29.000 There's his cornhole strategy. 1.00
02:28:31.000 He's unbelievable.
02:28:33.000 He's really good.
02:28:33.000 Look at this.
02:28:34.000 He's just sinking them.
02:28:35.000 Bags.
02:28:36.000 Bags.
02:28:38.000 And now he's in jail.
02:28:39.000 Poor guy.
02:28:40.000 He could have been a hero of our generation.
02:28:43.000 So, did he kill the guy for a reason?
02:28:46.000 I'm sure.
02:28:48.000 Lost his limbs, bacterial infection at 10 years old, demonstrating shooting.
02:28:52.000 So, what is the story?
02:28:53.000 What argument?
02:28:54.000 Accused of shooting a guy during a driving argument.
02:28:57.000 He wanted the two guys in the car to help him get rid of the body.
02:29:00.000 They refused.
02:29:01.000 And then he dropped them out of the car, went and dropped the body somewhere.
02:29:05.000 Someone found the body, and then they came after him.
02:29:08.000 That'd be tough to dig a hole. 1.00
02:29:08.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
02:29:09.000 Bro, the way Ari lives. 1.00
02:29:10.000 I just think he died.
02:29:10.000 I don't think he died.
02:29:11.000 It's astonishing.
02:29:13.000 Ari leaves like a ghost in the night. 1.00
02:29:15.000 They got to piss every 10 minutes.
02:29:15.000 Well, he's old.
02:29:16.000 I'm older than him.
02:29:17.000 He drinks broom juice, it goes right through you.
02:29:25.000 So, as an argument, he just shot the guy?
02:29:27.000 You'd think it would take so long for him to pull out the gun, he would just smack it out of his head.
02:29:32.000 You'd think.
02:29:32.000 But I think when that guy comes up to you, you're like, what are you going to do?
02:29:35.000 You're not scared.
02:29:36.000 So the guy's got all the time in the world.
02:29:38.000 I'd be so scared if I saw that guy.
02:29:39.000 Oh, my God. 0.98
02:29:40.000 He's like a slug. 0.93
02:29:42.000 He's very capable. 0.93
02:29:44.000 He looks like Toe Jam.
02:29:47.000 Toe Jam and Earl.
02:29:50.000 What a pull.
02:29:51.000 Wow.
02:29:54.000 I mean, we'd be mean to him.
02:29:57.000 I want to make fun of him for being mean He's in jail.
02:30:02.000 He's in jail right now?
02:30:05.000 You better believe it.
02:30:06.000 Huh.
02:30:07.000 Found in a nearby yard. 1.00
02:30:09.000 That's who you want as your bunk mate.
02:30:10.000 He's now dead at the scene.
02:30:10.000 He's not really.
02:30:11.000 He was tracked to Virginia Hospital and arrested.
02:30:14.000 He was in a hospital.
02:30:15.000 Why was he in a hospital?
02:30:16.000 Maryland.
02:30:18.000 Well, did they get in a fight?
02:30:20.000 Yeah, witnesses said the guy was in a fight.
02:30:21.000 So, rarely in the news.
02:30:22.000 So, the guy punched him and he had to go to the hospital?
02:30:25.000 So, he was tracked to a hospital.
02:30:26.000 So, the guy who he shot was the guy punching him? 1.00
02:30:30.000 Sounds about right.
02:30:31.000 You know what I'm saying?
02:30:32.000 You're punching a guy with no arms and no legs.
02:30:34.000 He's got to do something to fight back.
02:30:37.000 But that's what's weird. 1.00
02:30:37.000 Shoot you. 1.00
02:30:38.000 It's like, it says. 1.00
02:30:40.000 It looks so happy.
02:30:41.000 But if it says he went to a hospital, why did he have to go to a hospital?
02:30:45.000 Mad rifle.
02:30:46.000 Mad rifle.
02:30:47.000 That's what they say.
02:30:49.000 Riding high in April.
02:30:51.000 Yeah, it says offense.
02:30:52.000 They're tracking him to the hospital.
02:30:52.000 That's all it says.
02:30:53.000 Yeah, but why was he in the hospital? 0.99
02:30:55.000 So, did they get in a fist fight and he pulled the gun on the guy who was beating his ass? 0.99
02:30:59.000 Let's get him to the hospital. 1.00
02:31:01.000 I'm fine. 0.99
02:31:02.000 They were like, holy shit, take him to New York. 0.98
02:31:04.000 But it's a weird situation. 0.99
02:31:06.000 If he was at a hospital, why was he at a hospital?
02:31:08.000 We don't know the whole story.
02:31:11.000 I don't know.
02:31:12.000 Anyway, he plays a mean cornhole.
02:31:15.000 A mean cornhole.
02:31:16.000 A mean cornhole. 1.00
02:31:18.000 Pull the body out of the car. 1.00
02:31:19.000 They said no.
02:31:20.000 They got out of the car instead and he drove off with the body still in the car.
02:31:24.000 Oh, boy.
02:31:24.000 How's he going to get him out of the car?
02:31:25.000 He's got no arms. 0.99
02:31:26.000 Damn, is that Bieber in the middle? 0.99
02:31:28.000 It's Bieber. 1.00
02:31:28.000 Oh, I thought it was the same crime. 1.00
02:31:30.000 I was like, wait.
02:31:31.000 What did Bieber get arrested for?
02:31:31.000 Celebrity.
02:31:33.000 By the way, go back up.
02:31:34.000 Look how dashing Bieber is in his mugshot.
02:31:36.000 Did Bieber get arrested for looking cute?
02:31:38.000 Perfectly straight teeth.
02:31:39.000 Who knows?
02:31:39.000 Lohan's not bad either.
02:31:41.000 Lohan's not bad there.
02:31:42.000 Lohan rules, dude.
02:31:43.000 Lohan's hot again.
02:31:44.000 I co starred in a movie with Lohan.
02:31:45.000 She's back.
02:31:46.000 Oh, good.
02:31:47.000 You co starred in a movie with Lohan?
02:31:47.000 Lohan's back.
02:31:48.000 Yeah, worst movie of all time.
02:31:50.000 Who was that?
02:31:51.000 Inappropriate comedy.
02:31:53.000 Directed by the Shamwell guy.
02:31:56.000 You're in that?
02:31:56.000 Lohan?
02:31:57.000 Lohan?
02:31:58.000 We had an Academy Award winner, Adrian Brody.
02:32:00.000 What?
02:32:02.000 Adrian Brody's in that?
02:32:02.000 What?
02:32:03.000 Crazy, the pianist. 0.99
02:32:04.000 Who's the chick who got drunk driving who was in the Avatar? 0.85
02:32:07.000 Boom, that one at the end, Rodriguez. 0.99
02:32:09.000 I don't know if she got a DUE.
02:32:09.000 Wow.
02:32:11.000 Rob Schneider's in that?
02:32:12.000 Oh, but everybody. 1.00
02:32:13.000 Who's the middle lady with the dress? 0.98
02:32:15.000 Is that really the worst movie ever?
02:32:18.000 It was on Rotten Tomatoes as the worst movie of all time.
02:32:20.000 And for a while it had zero.
02:32:22.000 How did Adrian Brody?
02:32:23.000 He just started to get roped into that.
02:32:24.000 Yeah, what happened to him then?
02:32:25.000 He got roped into that.
02:32:26.000 He was in a downturn of his career.
02:32:29.000 He was on a downswing.
02:32:29.000 He came back.
02:32:31.000 You know what's crazy about Brody is banging Harvey's ass. 1.00
02:32:33.000 Am I in there? 1.00
02:32:34.000 Oh, you know who else is in there?
02:32:35.000 Oh, Theo Vaughn.
02:32:39.000 Vaughn Climber.
02:32:39.000 All right.
02:32:40.000 Wow.
02:32:41.000 Ari Shafir.
02:32:41.000 There we go.
02:32:42.000 And the amazing racist. 0.95
02:32:43.000 With some writing on this. 1.00
02:32:45.000 Christina Poziski did some writing on this.
02:32:45.000 Dante.
02:32:47.000 Okay.
02:32:48.000 How about that? 0.94
02:32:49.000 Dante as the racist assistant.
02:32:51.000 Rob Schneider as JD. 0.99
02:32:52.000 That's when I was offering black people a free trip back to Africa. 1.00
02:32:58.000 You really did it, man. 1.00
02:32:59.000 You really went for it.
02:33:00.000 Back then.
02:33:01.000 So, when you got the script, did you realize it was going to be that bad?
02:33:04.000 There was no script.
02:33:06.000 Vince came to me and was like, Hey, those amazing racists you did, can we make more of those?
02:33:09.000 And I'm like, I don't own them.
02:33:11.000 And he goes, Can we make new ones?
02:33:12.000 And I was like, Yeah, if you want to.
02:33:13.000 Hey, it earned $172K.
02:33:14.000 $625, it's opening theater.
02:33:19.000 There were some expenses.
02:33:23.000 There were all these pictures of one person in the theater.
02:33:27.000 I like how it says inappropriate, but for some reason, APP was about apps.
02:33:32.000 Dude, it was all about apps.
02:33:34.000 There's a whole backstory line.
02:33:35.000 None of it made any sense.
02:33:36.000 Like dating apps?
02:33:37.000 Yeah.
02:33:38.000 But wait, what year was this?
02:33:39.000 Oh, okay.
02:33:40.000 That's a good question.
02:33:41.000 2013.
02:33:42.000 I remember.
02:33:42.000 Was there even this by myself?
02:33:44.000 They were just beginning a match.
02:33:44.000 Was it 2013?
02:33:45.000 It was a big deal.
02:33:46.000 They added it to a 625.
02:33:48.000 Dude, this movie was so fun.
02:33:50.000 I've never heard of this in my life. 0.95
02:33:51.000 We went to the border and I was doing a setup scene and some people were fucking running and crossing. 0.99
02:33:56.000 Like, Adrian Broder is a fucking legit actor. 0.99
02:33:56.000 But it's so crazy. 0.99
02:34:00.000 He was down and then back up.
02:34:02.000 They gave him money.
02:34:03.000 Why did he go down?
02:34:04.000 He did a movie with you?
02:34:06.000 Well, he was in a separate scene.
02:34:07.000 He was in Dirt, Flirty Harry.
02:34:10.000 Flirty Harry.
02:34:13.000 So, but why? 0.99
02:34:14.000 What the fuck is going on? 0.99
02:34:16.000 That's a wow guy. 1.00
02:34:17.000 He went to jail too.
02:34:18.000 Young Theo.
02:34:20.000 Oh my God. 1.00
02:34:21.000 Look at Ari. 1.00
02:34:23.000 Wow.
02:34:23.000 Young Theo.
02:34:24.000 Oh my God, bro.
02:34:25.000 We should have a screening of this on the next Protect Our Parks.
02:34:28.000 I would love to see this.
02:34:29.000 Let's watch it and talk.
02:34:31.000 Bro, this looks so bad.
02:34:32.000 This is horrible.
02:34:34.000 It's so bad. 1.00
02:34:35.000 The girl with the brunette right there? 0.99
02:34:35.000 Who's the girl? 0.99
02:34:37.000 Rodriguez.
02:34:38.000 Oh, the girl from Aliens?
02:34:40.000 Isn't she in Aliens too?
02:34:42.000 I don't know. 1.00
02:34:43.000 See if she's in Aliens. 1.00
02:34:43.000 Maybe. 1.00
02:34:44.000 She's Vin Diesel's lady.
02:34:46.000 That's crazy. 0.89
02:34:47.000 They got her in this?
02:34:48.000 Yeah, kids in cages.
02:34:50.000 How does this sham wow guy talk everybody into this?
02:34:55.000 Money, bro.
02:34:56.000 GS gave me advice.
02:34:57.000 He was like, hey, they want me to do this thing.
02:34:58.000 He goes, Ari, every once in a while, so people in Hollywood.
02:35:02.000 Oh, there it is.
02:35:03.000 Shane, you can't laugh at this.
02:35:04.000 Young Ari. 1.00
02:35:05.000 Should I send this one out? 0.93
02:35:07.000 We'll take it from here. 1.00
02:35:09.000 I will say, so like, you guys were making dog shit like this. 1.00
02:35:12.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:35:13.000 And then I was like, because I wasn't really around for that.
02:35:16.000 Yeah.
02:35:16.000 And then it's like, man, I can't believe cancel culture exists.
02:35:19.000 It's like, oh, now I get it. 1.00
02:35:21.000 Yeah, put an end to this horse shit. 1.00
02:35:25.000 That's so bad. 1.00
02:35:26.000 I'm with the limbs now. 1.00
02:35:29.000 That shit stinks. 1.00
02:35:31.000 It inspired everybody. 1.00
02:35:33.000 2013.
02:35:35.000 Yeah.
02:35:36.000 Those amazing racist videos were probably like 2005, 6, 7.
02:35:39.000 Yeah, five, I think.
02:35:40.000 Because it was before, I think those videos were before the whole Mencia thing at the store.
02:35:46.000 That's right.
02:35:47.000 Because he was like, who are you to say anything about racial jokes?
02:35:50.000 Somebody's like, amazing racist?
02:35:51.000 Yeah.
02:35:52.000 He was like, sorry, what was the point for that?
02:35:54.000 Yeah.
02:35:55.000 Wow.
02:35:56.000 That's crazy they got Adrian Brody because he's probably paid money to try to get that released, like, deleted.
02:36:03.000 I've never heard of it.
02:36:04.000 No one even knows about it.
02:36:05.000 They do now.
02:36:05.000 They do now.
02:36:06.000 That's right.
02:36:07.000 You have a million people are currently listening.
02:36:10.000 Yeah. 0.98
02:36:10.000 You guys are actually going to make a fucking ton of money on that movie. 0.98
02:36:13.000 Shaman guy. 0.97
02:36:14.000 I love events.
02:36:15.000 Oh, yeah.
02:36:15.000 He did kill Tony.
02:36:17.000 Yeah.
02:36:17.000 Recently?
02:36:18.000 I remember he got caught biting that hook.
02:36:18.000 About a year ago.
02:36:20.000 No, the hook was biting his tongue and he had to, like, get off my fucking tongue. 0.99
02:36:23.000 And he was like, Like, he did something. 0.99
02:36:25.000 I assaulted a hooker and got arrested. 1.00
02:36:27.000 That's not so bad. 1.00
02:36:28.000 What was he doing with his tongue?
02:36:29.000 She bit it. 0.96
02:36:30.000 Why would you have your tongue involved in a hooker at all? 1.00
02:36:33.000 Yeah, you don't kiss a hooker. 1.00
02:36:33.000 Friendship. 1.00
02:36:33.000 What's happening? 1.00
02:36:35.000 Well, you do if you're drunk.
02:36:36.000 Passionately.
02:36:36.000 Yeah.
02:36:37.000 Let's go.
02:36:37.000 Sometimes you pay for just kisses.
02:36:39.000 Let's go.
02:36:40.000 I wish you were my girlfriend.
02:36:42.000 We knew a guy at the comedy store who would pay extra. 1.00
02:36:45.000 I'm not going to say who, but who would pay extra to fuck, to go down on hookers without. 1.00
02:36:53.000 Really? 1.00
02:36:53.000 Yes. 1.00
02:36:54.000 To go down on hookers. 0.99
02:36:55.000 You don't know him. 0.99
02:36:56.000 Wow.
02:36:57.000 He would pay a forester for that?
02:36:59.000 Oh, he paid a forester for that?
02:37:00.000 Oh, he paid a forester for that? 1.00
02:37:01.000 He's a fucking sham wow guy. 1.00
02:37:02.000 He's the funniest. 1.00
02:37:03.000 He would be open about it.
02:37:04.000 He's like, nah, they want to shut it down.
02:37:06.000 This sham wow guy is running for Congress?
02:37:08.000 I'll vote for him. 0.97
02:37:09.000 Make America grow some balls again. 0.87
02:37:11.000 Like here, it's like Cedar Park. 0.98
02:37:13.000 What?
02:37:13.000 Yeah.
02:37:14.000 What is his first nine bills in Congress?
02:37:14.000 What?
02:37:16.000 Post release with a headset?
02:37:18.000 No tax on Social Security.
02:37:20.000 Great.
02:37:20.000 That's reasonable.
02:37:21.000 Parental class view.
02:37:23.000 Don't know what that is.
02:37:23.000 What does that mean?
02:37:24.000 Ring cameras to protect our homes.
02:37:26.000 Oh, and classes.
02:37:26.000 We do not.
02:37:27.000 A woke bus.
02:37:28.000 Oh, ring cameras in classes. 0.92
02:37:29.000 That's not a bad idea.
02:37:30.000 Yeah. 0.98
02:37:31.000 N triple X on X. Pornography on X. 0.99
02:37:33.000 Oh, boo. 1.00
02:37:35.000 Sounds like this guy wants to jerk off the kids. 0.99
02:37:38.000 And he's pretending to be a congressman to go, we should set up cameras in schools. 0.98
02:37:42.000 Healthy screen acts.
02:37:43.000 I like number five.
02:37:44.000 Cowboy coats for kids.
02:37:45.000 Has to be a human at customer service.
02:37:47.000 I like that.
02:37:47.000 That's not bad.
02:37:48.000 That's someone who's annoyed.
02:37:49.000 Like, agent!
02:37:51.000 Agent!
02:37:51.000 Yeah.
02:37:52.000 That'll ruin India. 1.00
02:37:54.000 Oh, interesting. 1.00
02:37:55.000 Children need to pray. 0.97
02:37:56.000 Oh, come on.
02:37:57.000 A lot of kids' stuff coming out of this guy.
02:37:59.000 Yeah.
02:38:00.000 Does he have children?
02:38:01.000 Cowboy coats for kids.
02:38:02.000 Find out if he actually has children.
02:38:04.000 I doubt it. 0.99
02:38:05.000 Let's find out the Shamwell guy. 1.00
02:38:06.000 We got a Jew here, Shlomi. 0.95
02:38:08.000 Oh, yeah.
02:38:08.000 I got to tell you, he sent me a Shamwell jacket.
02:38:11.000 Oh, did you wear it entirely out of Shamwell?
02:38:14.000 Did you wear it everywhere?
02:38:15.000 He is a charming fellow.
02:38:17.000 He must be great when it rains out and that thing weighs 80 pounds.
02:38:20.000 Wear that for the roast.
02:38:22.000 I go, great.
02:38:23.000 Now I weigh 375 pounds.
02:38:26.000 Find out if that guy has a family.
02:38:28.000 His story is actually pretty interesting.
02:38:29.000 It's kind of odd that he's concentrating so much on it. 0.99
02:38:31.000 He would just sell shit in Atlantic City, like on the streets. 0.99
02:38:33.000 I think it was the Bad World. 1.00
02:38:34.000 And he was just great at it.
02:38:35.000 And he goes, I'll take out like Byron Allen late night spots and just sell to more people.
02:38:40.000 He must have made so much money.
02:38:41.000 He made a ton of money.
02:38:42.000 He made a fortune.
02:38:42.000 Shamwell was nice.
02:38:43.000 I'll tell you, I got a good Shamwell story.
02:38:45.000 One time I was staying at my buddy's house and I stood up in the middle of the night. 1.00
02:38:51.000 He gave me his bed, so I was in that.
02:38:52.000 But his roommate was in the other bed.
02:38:54.000 It was in college.
02:38:55.000 And I just stood up and pissed on the other guy's bed while he was in it. 0.99
02:38:59.000 Oh, damn. 0.99
02:39:00.000 And then in the morning, I got a sham well. 1.00
02:39:03.000 He soaked it all up?
02:39:04.000 He just pressed it against this guy.
02:39:06.000 Is that what it does?
02:39:07.000 It soaks?
02:39:07.000 Yeah.
02:39:08.000 It soaks really well.
02:39:09.000 It's a chamois cloth.
02:39:10.000 A chamois cloth is the thing they used to wash cars with forever.
02:39:13.000 He said he went to seven companies in Korea.
02:39:15.000 He goes, send me each one.
02:39:17.000 He goes, this one's the best one.
02:39:18.000 All right, put my name on that and run it around.
02:39:19.000 So is it like a synthetic version of a chamois cloth?
02:39:22.000 Because the chamois cloth is like an animal skin cloth that you use to clean cars with.
02:39:27.000 No, I do.
02:39:28.000 Yeah, chamois cloth is like you wash the car and then the car has all this water on it.
02:39:32.000 You use the chamois cloth first and then you polish it with like microfiber cloth.
02:39:36.000 Yeah, it's what it is.
02:39:37.000 Actually, yeah, it's very absorbent.
02:39:40.000 Yeah, I like the chamois thing.
02:39:42.000 Yeah, it's good. 1.00
02:39:43.000 You're breaking them up.
02:39:43.000 It reminds me of, yeah.
02:39:44.000 Yeah, I used to do that.
02:39:46.000 Yeah, I used to work at a car wash.
02:39:47.000 I used to work at a car wash.
02:39:48.000 I used to work at an auto auction.
02:39:49.000 Yeah, you do.
02:39:50.000 In a dealership and a garage.
02:39:51.000 Oh, there you go.
02:39:51.000 I used to do it all the time.
02:39:52.000 Which is why tires is so good.
02:39:54.000 It's out of knowledge, for sure.
02:39:56.000 You're right, what you know.
02:39:56.000 Bro, you need a Muscle car.
02:39:58.000 You need a muscle car, Shane.
02:40:01.000 Hey, Shane, you know this car that some purchasers made?
02:40:03.000 I'm doing it wrong.
02:40:04.000 No, no, no, he's not doing it wrong.
02:40:05.000 I'm happy with that one.
02:40:06.000 That's the one's great.
02:40:07.000 But how about also, how about also you get like a modern muscle car that works really well?
02:40:11.000 Like a charger?
02:40:12.000 Do you know about Revology Mustangs?
02:40:15.000 Bullet?
02:40:15.000 Have you ever seen my 68 Mustang?
02:40:17.000 My Bullet Mustang?
02:40:17.000 Yes.
02:40:18.000 Yeah, that shit rocks, right? 1.00
02:40:19.000 There's a company, this company, Revology, they're the shit. 1.00
02:40:22.000 They make a brand new 1969 Mustang. 1.00
02:40:26.000 Well, that's what I wanted.
02:40:27.000 Look at that.
02:40:28.000 This is Revology.
02:40:30.000 What do you mean, Brandon?
02:40:33.000 The boss?
02:40:33.000 So, this is, no, it's the guy, Tom Scarpello.
02:40:37.000 He worked at Ford.
02:40:39.000 He made the Ford GT. 1.00
02:40:39.000 Can you imagine me getting out of that in fucking gym shorts? 1.00
02:40:42.000 Me? 1.00
02:40:42.000 I do it all the time. 1.00
02:40:43.000 You look cool.
02:40:44.000 I would look American.
02:40:45.000 You look cool. 1.00
02:40:46.000 You look fucking American! 1.00
02:40:49.000 You do look American. 1.00
02:40:50.000 You look American.
02:40:51.000 So, that's what I have.
02:40:53.000 I have that car on the left.
02:40:55.000 I have that car on the left.
02:40:57.000 I have.
02:40:58.000 What?
02:40:58.000 You have that one of the blue?
02:41:00.000 That is blue.
02:41:03.000 Like Steve McQueen's?
02:41:05.000 I have a green one, a 68, but the point is, he makes the new one, which is even cooler looking, the 69. 0.75
02:41:11.000 Go to models, Jamie.
02:41:12.000 The 67 is the one.
02:41:13.000 Go to models, and this is.
02:41:15.000 This is a 6.5. 0.99
02:41:16.000 No, The new 69 is the shit. 1.00
02:41:18.000 That one, the Boss, the Boss 429. 1.00
02:41:21.000 Click on that.
02:41:22.000 So it's just an old body with a new car.
02:41:24.000 But it's not an old body.
02:41:25.000 It's a brand new exact version.
02:41:28.000 Yes, it's a full factory.
02:41:30.000 It's a full factory, but it's completely reliable.
02:41:33.000 I can't drive that.
02:41:34.000 This is like two Jordan 1s.
02:41:36.000 I will force you at gunpoint to drive that. 1.00
02:41:38.000 You need one of those. 1.00
02:41:39.000 You need a black one.
02:41:40.000 No, I need a 97 Land Cruiser.
02:41:42.000 Ooh, that's a cool car.
02:41:44.000 Oh, you do?
02:41:45.000 Yeah.
02:41:45.000 That's what I was thinking.
02:41:46.000 I have a 95 with a supercharged Corvette engine in it.
02:41:49.000 And I need a new car.
02:41:50.000 You and I couldn't wait long enough to get one.
02:41:52.000 What you got is perfect.
02:41:53.000 What you got is perfect.
02:41:54.000 That's Buick Regal.
02:41:55.000 Do you want to tell people what you got? 0.99
02:41:56.000 I need a Libera now. 1.00
02:41:57.000 No, they'll tell me what you got.
02:41:59.000 But what you got, so that's a cool car.
02:42:02.000 That's a real car.
02:42:02.000 I love those.
02:42:04.000 Jamie, pull up mine.
02:42:05.000 I have a 1995 that TLC made me, and I had to put a supercharged Corvette engine in it, and then I had Colvin Automotive.
02:42:13.000 Change the supercharger, jack it up to 800 horsepower.
02:42:17.000 It's got dual exhaust now.
02:42:18.000 Oh, it's a total apocalypse car.
02:42:20.000 It's got a gun safe in it.
02:42:21.000 It's got everything.
02:42:22.000 Who's the nerd? 0.98
02:42:23.000 That's my friend Jonathan Ward who fucking built the car for me. 0.99
02:42:26.000 He's the man. 0.97
02:42:27.000 Now, Jamie, call up a 2017 Toyota Corolla.
02:42:30.000 That guy needs a wedgie. 0.58
02:42:32.000 You need a 69 Boss. 1.00
02:42:34.000 That's what you need.
02:42:35.000 I love a 69 Boss.
02:42:36.000 Oh, you got the winch.
02:42:37.000 Yeah, oh, it's got everything.
02:42:38.000 Well, I got this when I was worried that, well, I had a family and I was worried that at one point in time LA was going to experience an apocalypse and I had to be able to drive somewhere where there's no roads no roads.
02:42:38.000 You're amazing.
02:42:47.000 So, I got an extra large gas tank on that thing.
02:42:50.000 Nice.
02:42:51.000 I have steel bumpers all around, rock sliders on the side.
02:42:54.000 I wanted to make it so I could just go.
02:42:56.000 Run over protesters.
02:42:57.000 I can't wait to get away. 1.00
02:42:58.000 I can't wait to die at the gates in front of your house when the apocalypse happens. 1.00
02:43:02.000 You're not going to die. 1.00
02:43:03.000 I can't wait for someone to come out, dog.
02:43:06.000 I'm going to let you in.
02:43:07.000 Come on, dog.
02:43:08.000 Please, please, Joe.
02:43:09.000 Come on.
02:43:10.000 How dare you? 0.51
02:43:11.000 Save me.
02:43:12.000 You park there like, do not get out of your car.
02:43:14.000 By then, we'll be at the ranch.
02:43:15.000 We'll have the ranch fully operational by now.
02:43:18.000 But between now and then, you know. 0.99
02:43:20.000 Fucking Mustang. 1.00
02:43:21.000 You need a boss. 1.00
02:43:22.000 Brother.
02:43:23.000 Is Mustang the only one they make?
02:43:25.000 Can we get like an old Porsche?
02:43:26.000 Can I get an old.
02:43:27.000 Well, there's plenty of companies that do that.
02:43:28.000 Too big for an old Porsche.
02:43:29.000 You're too big for a Porsche.
02:43:30.000 Yeah.
02:43:31.000 A Land Cruiser would be good.
02:43:32.000 This is another company called RSR Recreations.
02:43:36.000 They make a 911. 0.99
02:43:38.000 You can get it with no fucking AC, no nothing. 0.99
02:43:41.000 It only weighs 2,000 pounds. 1.00
02:43:45.000 Dancing Jews. 1.00
02:43:46.000 I knew about it on 910. 0.98
02:43:48.000 Dancing Israelis. 0.76
02:43:50.000 They're another building. 1.00
02:43:51.000 Don't Google dancing Israelis, whatever you do. 0.98
02:43:53.000 Don't read into that story.
02:43:55.000 You'll go, hey, what?
02:43:56.000 Wait a second.
02:43:57.000 Deal doesn't build.
02:43:59.000 Apex?
02:44:00.000 How much money? 1.00
02:44:00.000 All right, there's my fucking platform. 1.00
02:44:02.000 Okay, what about. 1.00
02:44:03.000 I don't care. 0.82
02:44:04.000 Let's get rid of Apex. 1.00
02:44:05.000 Let's get rid of all those fucking ones. 1.00
02:44:06.000 Well, money and politics. 1.00
02:44:06.000 What's Apex? 1.00
02:44:08.000 Yeah, all lobbies.
02:44:08.000 Yeah.
02:44:09.000 Not just Apex.
02:44:09.000 Just the ones that are convenient.
02:44:10.000 You need a muscle car.
02:44:13.000 If you don't want to get that, how about a new muscle car?
02:44:16.000 How about a Shelby Super Snake R?
02:44:21.000 Brother, I'm never driving that, bro.
02:44:23.000 I bet you should.
02:44:25.000 You need one car.
02:44:26.000 You need none.
02:44:27.000 You need one car to drive one car.
02:44:27.000 What?
02:44:29.000 I have a pretty small house and a tiny garage.
02:44:31.000 What are you, a communist?
02:44:33.000 You need to get a new house. 1.00
02:44:35.000 First of all, you need to do your fucking. 1.00
02:44:38.000 Baller now. 1.00
02:44:39.000 So you need a new house.
02:44:40.000 That's a Shelby Super Snake car. 0.90
02:44:40.000 Look at that. 0.90
02:44:42.000 He can't drive that.
02:44:43.000 You know what that would look like? 0.99
02:44:44.000 Me getting out or bringing a girl in there and going, I have 850 fucking horsepower. 0.97
02:44:49.000 That's going to be great to pull him to a parking lot. 1.00
02:44:52.000 Shut up, Ari. 1.00
02:44:53.000 Get on the highway. 1.00
02:44:56.000 Get on the highway.
02:44:58.000 I go, R.A., please get a nice car.
02:45:01.000 Please just get a nice car.
02:45:02.000 How about a Cadillac Blackwing?
02:45:04.000 2022 Cadillac.
02:45:04.000 How about one of these?
02:45:05.000 How about a CT5V Blackwing? 0.68
02:45:09.000 How about that?
02:45:09.000 Can't have a caddy?
02:45:10.000 Come on.
02:45:11.000 I agree. 0.99
02:45:11.000 If I saw someone do that, I'd be like, bro, those things fucking move. 0.99
02:45:13.000 That's my dad's car. 0.99
02:45:14.000 Just got a sensible Mitsubishi.
02:45:16.000 That is not your dad's car. 0.96
02:45:17.000 That's a Blackwing.
02:45:18.000 That thing has almost 700 horsepower.
02:45:21.000 Very reliable.
02:45:22.000 Very reliable. 0.99
02:45:23.000 You can solder the fucking hood shut for five years. 1.00
02:45:26.000 Why would you do that, R.A.? 1.00
02:45:27.000 You have money too, R.A. You drive me crazy.
02:45:29.000 I was trying to get him to buy a BMW M3 in like 2008.
02:45:33.000 That'd be nice.
02:45:34.000 Why didn't you do it?
02:45:34.000 I love a BMW.
02:45:36.000 Because I had to put all my money to this goddamn storytelling show. 0.99
02:45:38.000 No, but you're going to pay me. 0.99
02:45:39.000 I put my money into that.
02:45:40.000 Yeah, but you made it back already.
02:45:41.000 You told me you made it back.
02:45:42.000 You spent more money.
02:45:43.000 Yeah, I didn't make the budget back.
02:45:44.000 The end available right now at RT.
02:45:45.000 I've tried for years, maybe decades, to try to talk you into buying a nice car.
02:45:50.000 You can't.
02:45:50.000 Yeah.
02:45:51.000 Look at that hat.
02:45:51.000 It's New York.
02:45:52.000 You can't have a nice car in New York.
02:45:53.000 Yeah, you can't have a nice car.
02:45:54.000 I got an old BMW.
02:45:55.000 If you've had enough money to have a house other places, just get a house out here. 0.97
02:46:00.000 Get a house out here with a garage and keep some nice cars in it so you can fucking roll. 0.88
02:46:03.000 Do you have enough money for that? 0.99
02:46:04.000 Pull me. 0.94
02:46:05.000 You spent all your money in Mazamon. 1.00
02:46:07.000 I'll give you the fucking money. 1.00
02:46:08.000 Tell me what car you want to buy. 1.00
02:46:09.000 Well, hold on a second.
02:46:10.000 Are you buying houses?
02:46:11.000 Oh, Lamborghini.
02:46:11.000 I'm buying him a car, not a house.
02:46:13.000 I'm still waiting to get a watch.
02:46:15.000 I held out.
02:46:15.000 He said, Watch.
02:46:16.000 I'm like, I'll hold out for car.
02:46:17.000 He gave you a watch.
02:46:18.000 You didn't wear it.
02:46:19.000 That's a Casio.
02:46:21.000 I would buy you a watch if you'd wear it.
02:46:21.000 It's a Rolex.
02:46:23.000 If I buy you a watch, will you wear it?
02:46:24.000 Sure.
02:46:25.000 How many times?
02:46:26.000 Every day.
02:46:27.000 I'm thinking of something.
02:46:27.000 Really?
02:46:28.000 I shower with this.
02:46:29.000 Right, but if I bought you a real watch, would you wear it?
02:46:31.000 I mean, not like a Rolex. 1.00
02:46:32.000 One of those astronaut fuckers. 1.00
02:46:33.000 You're not going to wear a Rolex. 1.00
02:46:34.000 Okay, you didn't wear it.
02:46:36.000 Yeah, but I don't want to.
02:46:37.000 Next, protect our parks.
02:46:39.000 I'm going to get you a Speedmaster watch.
02:46:40.000 Pause, hold on.
02:46:41.000 Can I tell you what he wants?
02:46:41.000 Omega's going to say.
02:46:42.000 Shamwell was a Speedmaster.
02:46:43.000 He wants that size watch, not a bulky one.
02:46:45.000 He wants a thinner watch.
02:46:47.000 All right, listen.
02:46:48.000 I like a small watch.
02:46:49.000 This is not too big.
02:46:50.000 This is a Rolex, but it's on a rubber strap.
02:46:54.000 It's a little understated.
02:46:56.000 G-Shock Rules.
02:46:58.000 Would you wear that? 1.00
02:46:59.000 Indiglow?
02:47:01.000 I like a metal band, but yeah, it's a good-looking watch.
02:47:03.000 $100,000?
02:47:05.000 What did Louis get you?
02:47:07.000 He got me the oyster face, or what do you call it?
02:47:10.000 Oh, okay.
02:47:10.000 It's really nice, and it's inscribed in the back.
02:47:12.000 Thanks for working with me, LCK.
02:47:14.000 You don't even wear it.
02:47:15.000 It's on my shelf, it's propped up.
02:47:17.000 Okay.
02:47:18.000 So, if I buy you an Omega, you're going to wear it.
02:47:20.000 Hell yeah.
02:47:21.000 You don't have to buy me an Omega. 1.00
02:47:22.000 Shut up. 1.00
02:47:23.000 It's over. 1.00
02:47:23.000 Just fuck it around. 1.00
02:47:24.000 Norman, Norman, you're going to love this. 1.00
02:47:26.000 Egit gave me the coolest thing that I have, which was Norm McDonald's cup on the late night with Letterman.
02:47:35.000 The actual mug from the late night.
02:47:37.000 Egit gave me this.
02:47:38.000 The coolest thing.
02:47:39.000 From Norm doing.
02:47:39.000 Pull that up.
02:47:42.000 Talk show?
02:47:43.000 Oh, Letterman.
02:47:43.000 So, he had that.
02:47:44.000 That's cool.
02:47:44.000 He brought it home.
02:47:45.000 Wow, that's a great one.
02:47:47.000 That's the best gift I got.
02:47:48.000 That's an amazing one.
02:47:49.000 Protect that.
02:47:50.000 That'd be scary.
02:47:50.000 I would break that.
02:47:52.000 Imagine if a chick comes over your house and drops that.
02:47:54.000 Can I have a cup of tea? 1.00
02:47:55.000 I would punch it. 0.95
02:47:56.000 Whoopsie. 1.00
02:47:57.000 Oh, I protect it.
02:47:57.000 It's on my mantle.
02:47:58.000 It's in the middle.
02:47:59.000 It's above my floor.
02:48:00.000 Wow, that's great.
02:48:01.000 I put like ring ropes around it to cushion it.
02:48:03.000 Yeah, I probably should.
02:48:04.000 Mickey Mantle.
02:48:05.000 Yeah.
02:48:06.000 Mickey Mantle.
02:48:08.000 That's a good one.
02:48:09.000 That was the best one.
02:48:10.000 Those Rodney notes are great.
02:48:11.000 Oh, my God.
02:48:12.000 Isn't that amazing in the green room?
02:48:13.000 Those handwritten Rodney notes from his Tonight Show special.
02:48:16.000 Yes, Rodney's cool.
02:48:17.000 Whitney got us those.
02:48:18.000 Rodney's wife donated.
02:48:19.000 She found out about the club.
02:48:21.000 She knew we were doing it and she donated it.
02:48:22.000 To us.
02:48:23.000 Very cool.
02:48:23.000 Wow.
02:48:24.000 It's a cool thing to see in there.
02:48:26.000 It's amazing.
02:48:27.000 And you get to read them and you see how he would make the punchlines bold and all the notes and then bold punchline.
02:48:34.000 Oh, yeah.
02:48:34.000 It's cool.
02:48:35.000 It's like the feeling, the spirit of joke writing is in that room.
02:48:39.000 He was a drug addict.
02:48:41.000 Allegedly.
02:48:41.000 No, I was a drug addict.
02:48:42.000 The coolest thing about Ronnie was that when weed was illegal.
02:48:45.000 He enjoyed drugs.
02:48:46.000 I don't know if he was a drug addict.
02:48:48.000 When weed was illegal and cops would come into a club he was in, he was just smoking weed.
02:48:52.000 He would just go up to him and be like, hello, officer, how are you doing?
02:48:54.000 Just holding.
02:48:54.000 Yeah.
02:48:55.000 He knew he was immune.
02:48:56.000 No one's going to touch over him.
02:48:57.000 I told you guys when I worked as a security guard, when I got to see Rodney perform, when I worked as a security guard.
02:49:02.000 Whoa.
02:49:03.000 I know he beat up a guy with a walkie talkie.
02:49:05.000 No, I didn't beat him up.
02:49:06.000 No, that was Alley Cat.
02:49:07.000 That was my boss. 0.93
02:49:08.000 He beat Alley Cat. 0.99
02:49:09.000 That was Alley Cat.
02:49:10.000 First day.
02:49:11.000 No, that was the first thing I heard you say. 0.99
02:49:14.000 I was like, damn, Joe's old. 0.99
02:49:15.000 He hit a boy. 0.99
02:49:16.000 He was like, no, that was my boy, Alley Cat.
02:49:18.000 That was the boss.
02:49:19.000 Alley Cat was the boss.
02:49:21.000 So what happened was one of the guys from my Taekwondo gym got hired to be security.
02:49:28.000 And they were like, bro, it's like 50 bucks an hour.
02:49:30.000 It's really cool.
02:49:30.000 You get to see concerts.
02:49:32.000 So we all went and I got to see Rodney there.
02:49:34.000 Rodney was backstage with nothing on but a bathrobe.
02:49:38.000 Open?
02:49:38.000 He was completely naked.
02:49:40.000 No, I didn't see that.
02:49:41.000 I saw him walking around with slippers and a bathrobe.
02:49:43.000 And then he went on stage with nothing but a bathrobe.
02:49:46.000 Bathrobe naked underneath it. 1.00
02:49:46.000 Damn. 1.00
02:49:48.000 Went on stage that way? 1.00
02:49:48.000 What? 1.00
02:49:49.000 That's amazing.
02:49:50.000 1986.
02:49:51.000 Okay.
02:49:52.000 Wow. 0.99
02:49:52.000 And fucking destroyed. 0.99
02:49:54.000 I was 19. 1.00
02:49:55.000 I was mesmerized.
02:49:57.000 And back then, I wasn't even thinking about doing comedy.
02:49:59.000 I was just.
02:50:00.000 Fighting and I was enjoying it, and I was like, This is this guy's so free.
02:50:04.000 I remember thinking that.
02:50:05.000 Yes.
02:50:05.000 Like, this guy's on stage with a, I mean, destroying.
02:50:10.000 I got no respect, no respect at all. 1.00
02:50:12.000 And the fucking place is going nuts. 1.00
02:50:14.000 He was killing punchline after punchline after punchline. 1.00
02:50:18.000 I was 19.
02:50:19.000 I mean, I was blown away.
02:50:20.000 And you were working.
02:50:21.000 I was working.
02:50:22.000 Yeah.
02:50:23.000 That's a good gig.
02:50:24.000 Got to see the shows.
02:50:25.000 That was also the job that I quit when, you know, the whole thing happened with COVID where Neil Young pulled his music off Spotify because I was giving out vaccine misinformation.
02:50:33.000 Wait, is that until he couldn't get it played elsewhere?
02:50:35.000 Yeah.
02:50:36.000 He didn't even own his music.
02:50:36.000 It was not really.
02:50:38.000 It's all bullshit. 0.99
02:50:39.000 But anyway, I didn't shit on him at the time, even though he's trying to ruin my life, because I was a Neil Young fan. 0.99
02:50:45.000 And I told the story about how when I was a security guard, the last day on the job was a Neil Young concert because a riot broke out. 0.89
02:50:51.000 And a riot broke out.
02:50:52.000 And I was like, I'm not fighting for 50 bucks an hour. 0.96
02:50:54.000 I fucking zipped up my hoodie and I just walked out and I never even got my last check. 0.91
02:50:59.000 It was cold out in Great Woods in Mansfield, it has a whole lawn. 1.00
02:50:59.000 Damn. 1.00
02:51:03.000 It's an amphitheater. 1.00
02:51:04.000 So the front.
02:51:06.000 Part that's all seated has a cover over it, and then the back part's a lawn. 0.99
02:51:10.000 It was a little cold out, so these fucking animals at the Neil Young concert started lighting bonfires. 0.98
02:51:15.000 And so the security guys had to come over and tell them, Hey, put out the fires. 1.00
02:51:18.000 And drunk guys were like, Fuck you. 1.00
02:51:20.000 And my friend Larry punched some guy, and Larry was like the nicest guy in the world. 1.00
02:51:23.000 I'm like, Oh my god, we're having a war.
02:51:25.000 And so the fight started breaking up. 0.80
02:51:27.000 And as soon as like my friends were safe and we were out, I'm like, Let's get the fuck out of here. 0.90
02:51:32.000 I put on my hoodie and I just quit. 0.99
02:51:34.000 I'm like, I'm not fighting these fucking people. 0.99
02:51:36.000 And that was my last day on the job as security guard. 1.00
02:51:38.000 I'm like, I'm not fighting these fucking people. 1.00
02:51:42.000 Fucking Neil Young. 1.00
02:51:45.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:51:45.000 It's so crazy. 1.00
02:51:46.000 It was 10.
02:51:47.000 10 Taekwondo black belts, including like national level competitors that were all security guards.
02:51:52.000 They were just waiting to kick somebody into a palm house and Neil Young fans.
02:51:56.000 We'd never, I mean, I know.
02:51:58.000 Who's Joe DeRosa?
02:52:01.000 Okay, let's hear this.
02:52:01.000 One guy.
02:52:02.000 Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
02:52:05.000 All right, go.
02:52:08.000 Hold on.
02:52:08.000 Where's the volume?
02:52:09.000 I don't know.
02:52:09.000 There's no sound.
02:52:12.000 I remember that was his COVID time, huh?
02:52:13.000 Yep.
02:52:14.000 I remember you'd wear that.
02:52:15.000 Oh my god, Shane.
02:52:17.000 Is this R?
02:52:17.000 Oh, yeah, yeah.
02:52:19.000 I was like, I'll add the song.
02:52:21.000 What's the with the glasses?
02:52:22.000 I don't know.
02:52:23.000 It's ski goals.
02:52:23.000 I was doing something.
02:52:24.000 Oh my god.
02:52:25.000 This is brutal.
02:52:26.000 I forgot that was my best part.
02:52:27.000 I said, I'll add the music.
02:52:30.000 Oh, this is like a hostage video.
02:52:36.000 Please turn this off.
02:52:37.000 This is horrific.
02:52:38.000 Oh, where did he go?
02:52:42.000 Oh!
02:52:42.000 I love the DeRosa so much.
02:52:43.000 Where did he go?
02:52:45.000 Oh, man, he took it so serious.
02:52:49.000 That's not as fun as Roddy Naked. 0.99
02:52:51.000 Goddamn, Shane. 1.00
02:52:53.000 You killed me. 1.00
02:52:54.000 That was tough.
02:52:55.000 I did not enjoy that at all.
02:52:57.000 That was bad.
02:52:58.000 I'll turn it.
02:52:58.000 Did you see the Scientology speedruns that were going around?
02:53:01.000 What, Scientology?
02:53:02.000 A week or two.
02:53:03.000 Kids are breaking into Scientology places all over the country.
02:53:06.000 Most of the LA.
02:53:07.000 They're breaking into them?
02:53:08.000 Norman is just trying.
02:53:08.000 Why?
02:53:10.000 Speedruns?
02:53:11.000 Yeah.
02:53:11.000 No, let me see this.
02:53:12.000 They're trying to get as deep as they can possibly get.
02:53:14.000 Into a Scientology building?
02:53:15.000 The Scientology building removed all the doors.
02:53:18.000 The Scientology.
02:53:19.000 Speed runs.
02:53:21.000 Wow.
02:53:21.000 That guy at the White House corresponds.
02:53:24.000 Yeah.
02:53:25.000 So cold.
02:53:26.000 Oh, you want to play games?
02:53:27.000 No, I don't.
02:53:30.000 Wow. 1.00
02:53:31.000 Damn. 1.00
02:53:32.000 Speed runs is such a great way to go through something. 1.00
02:53:34.000 Just run as fast as you can.
02:53:35.000 So, this is a trend? 1.00
02:53:37.000 They'll kill you, those guys. 0.93
02:53:38.000 To the point where now that they've taken the handles off the doors on the outside. 0.99
02:53:43.000 I went last night.
02:53:44.000 Let's go.
02:53:45.000 I went.
02:53:45.000 Me and Natasha went to Scientology once.
02:53:48.000 Online.
02:53:48.000 Yeah.
02:53:50.000 And they kind of got me a little.
02:53:51.000 They were like, can we get some information from you?
02:53:52.000 I'm like, I mean, my home address if you want. 0.99
02:53:54.000 And she was like, What the fuck are you doing? 0.99
02:53:56.000 I'm like, I don't know. 0.99
02:53:57.000 They're kidding me.
02:53:58.000 The book they saw was, It's good for ages eight to eight.
02:54:01.000 Wow.
02:54:02.000 So this kid just ran through?
02:54:03.000 Whoa.
02:54:04.000 So they're just busting through.
02:54:05.000 Making noise. 1.00
02:54:06.000 Maybe whites are coming back. 0.75
02:54:07.000 Causing as much damage as they can in like 10 seconds. 1.00
02:54:09.000 They're not really doing anything other than just.
02:54:11.000 And all these other people behind them, are they Scientologists or are these just all kids?
02:54:11.000 Good for them.
02:54:15.000 These would be the kids running around.
02:54:16.000 Also, there's more than one kid.
02:54:18.000 There's multiple kids.
02:54:19.000 30 of them.
02:54:19.000 Good for them.
02:54:20.000 Some will get through.
02:54:21.000 Oh, look how deep they're going.
02:54:22.000 Yeah, they're just trying to like, what's inside?
02:54:23.000 What are you guys hiding?
02:54:24.000 I love these guys.
02:54:25.000 No one really has ever seen inside those buildings.
02:54:27.000 They're having fun.
02:54:28.000 They just run out the exit.
02:54:28.000 Oh, how weird.
02:54:30.000 Well, they're like the second biggest real estate holders in Los Angeles, I think.
02:54:34.000 Yeah. 0.98
02:54:34.000 They're crazy. 0.98
02:54:35.000 Look at this guy trying. 0.99
02:54:35.000 Oh, my God. 0.99
02:54:37.000 I think it's like China and then Scientology raid with Jesus.
02:54:40.000 They're trying to open the door.
02:54:41.000 Oh, I love it.
02:54:42.000 Oh, this is so good.
02:54:43.000 They got you.
02:54:43.000 Dude, it's over.
02:54:44.000 They deserve this. 1.00
02:54:45.000 Those guys are cunts. 1.00
02:54:46.000 I mean, look at the inside, though, too. 1.00
02:54:47.000 I've never seen that.
02:54:48.000 Scientology has a voting block in Los Angeles.
02:54:50.000 Oh, it's really cool inside.
02:54:52.000 Look at that.
02:54:53.000 Wow.
02:54:54.000 I want to go in there.
02:54:54.000 Wow.
02:54:56.000 Yeah, because you take a photo outside their building, they'll tackle you.
02:54:59.000 Well, I remember during the 90s, a lot of people were thinking about joining Scientology because it was really good for your career.
02:55:05.000 Career, right?
02:55:05.000 They had an acting class.
02:55:07.000 Yeah.
02:55:08.000 Something beast.
02:55:09.000 Yeah.
02:55:09.000 They had Wilson, Tom Cruise, Brian Callan, was in an acting class with a Scientology guy.
02:55:15.000 And I remember he was telling me that a lot of these Scientologists get really far in acting because you get connected.
02:55:22.000 Right.
02:55:23.000 They just recorded Scientology Run.
02:55:25.000 I'm good for a kid.
02:55:26.000 It just started recently, I think about this month.
02:55:29.000 Good for them.
02:55:30.000 Look at this guy moving. 1.00
02:55:32.000 Look at this guy with the fucking suits trying to stop him. 0.99
02:55:34.000 Put a handout as if that's going to do it. 1.00
02:55:36.000 Very unenthusiastic.
02:55:38.000 Hey, did you guys see the? 0.92
02:55:39.000 Fat principal who stopped the school shooting? 0.79
02:55:41.000 Yeah.
02:55:42.000 That was amazing.
02:55:43.000 What?
02:55:43.000 Yeah, he got shot.
02:55:44.000 I think it was in Virginia.
02:55:45.000 He got shot. 0.99
02:55:46.000 The guy came into the building with a gun, and this fucking principal just rushes him, grabs him, tackles him, holds on to the gun. 0.99
02:55:53.000 He got shot in the leg, apparently. 1.00
02:55:54.000 Badass. 0.99
02:55:55.000 Just a weird old fat guy. 0.99
02:55:56.000 And then he went into a party. 0.98
02:55:58.000 It was like the prom.
02:55:59.000 Yeah, it was the prom like a week later, and everybody went crazy and cheered.
02:56:03.000 He became very emotional.
02:56:04.000 He stopped shooting at 20 deaths.
02:56:06.000 Yeah, I mean, he stopped it in its tracks as the guy came in through the front door.
02:56:11.000 You do have one moment where you see it, you realize, and you're like, let's go.
02:56:15.000 School principal injured in school shooting.
02:56:17.000 Shooter identified as former student. 0.62
02:56:19.000 This isn't Oklahoma.
02:56:19.000 Former student?
02:56:20.000 Oklahoma.
02:56:21.000 That's where it is.
02:56:21.000 Wayne Coyne.
02:56:22.000 Wow.
02:56:22.000 Yeah.
02:56:23.000 Look at the guy.
02:56:24.000 That's the guy. 0.98
02:56:25.000 But if you watch the video, the guy fucking literally threw himself on the guy with the gun. 0.98
02:56:30.000 Completely heroic. 0.93
02:56:31.000 Show me his face again, dude.
02:56:32.000 That's a guy who loves brewskis.
02:56:34.000 Oh, yeah.
02:56:35.000 Barbecue.
02:56:36.000 Barbecue. 0.98
02:56:37.000 Brewskis.
02:56:38.000 He's probably not worried about his death.
02:56:41.000 Hey, Mark, I can't even see you.
02:56:42.000 He's right to that, yeah.
02:56:43.000 You know what I'm saying?
02:56:45.000 He's ready to go to Valhalla.
02:56:46.000 He's ready to go.
02:56:46.000 He's a Viking.
02:56:47.000 That's an American Viking, dude. 1.00
02:56:49.000 You get fat as shit, you drink beers, you go, fuck it. 1.00
02:56:52.000 I've been waiting for somebody to kill Valhalla, brother. 1.00
02:56:54.000 He's a hero, goddammit. 0.98
02:56:57.000 Didn't Kash Patel say that about somebody seeing Valhalla? 0.82
02:57:00.000 About Charlie Kirk.
02:57:00.000 Yeah.
02:57:01.000 Corniest fucking shit ever. 1.00
02:57:02.000 Ooh, that's a rough one. 1.00
02:57:04.000 Your watch is over.
02:57:05.000 We'll see you in Valhalla.
02:57:06.000 It's a rough one. 1.00
02:57:06.000 Shut up. 1.00
02:57:07.000 I was watching a video on what a 30-odd six-round actually would do to a neck. 1.00
02:57:13.000 Oh, no.
02:57:14.000 There we go.
02:57:14.000 Yeah.
02:57:15.000 They showed, like, what the actual rifle round would do to a person's neck versus, like, what you saw from Charlie Kirk.
02:57:22.000 There's a lot of people that don't think it was really that guy on the roof that shot him.
02:57:25.000 That was something else.
02:57:26.000 Some people think it was a microphone.
02:57:28.000 But the problem with the microphone, yeah, the microphone shot him in the neck.
02:57:31.000 Like, there was some sort of an implemented destruction device.
02:57:35.000 The problem I have with that is you don't see any fire coming off of the microphone.
02:57:38.000 Like, if a microphone is going to kill you, it's going to shoot you somehow or another, it's got to be an explosive charge, and then you'll see a flash, and then something will project.
02:57:38.000 Right.
02:57:47.000 From that into your neck.
02:57:48.000 Did you say a microphone? 0.96
02:57:49.000 I think someone shot him.
02:57:50.000 Yeah, somebody shot him, right?
02:57:51.000 Someone shot him. 0.96
02:57:52.000 If a rifle shoots your neck, wouldn't it go far away? 0.98
02:57:54.000 You would imagine it would.
02:57:56.000 And in these videos that I saw, it shows a massive destruction.
02:57:59.000 So what they're using is ballistic gel.
02:58:01.000 And so they have like a fake neck and a fake head and like a spine.
02:58:04.000 They show ballistic gel what it looks like, and it just blows the neck completely apart.
02:58:10.000 It's just splatter, a giant opening wound.
02:58:14.000 Because this tissue is very soft.
02:58:16.000 I mean, this is not durable tissue.
02:58:18.000 And he got shot, and it was not even an exit hole.
02:58:20.000 Did they catch the guy?
02:58:22.000 You didn't know that?
02:58:22.000 Supposedly.
02:58:23.000 You didn't know that?
02:58:24.000 Well, you were in Guatemala.
02:58:25.000 I was in Guatemala.
02:58:25.000 I'm not just Pichu.
02:58:27.000 I remember at a bar in Guatemala, someone was like, Who's Charlie Kirk?
02:58:29.000 I'm like, I think he makes fun of college kids.
02:58:33.000 You're right about that.
02:58:34.000 That's not wrong.
02:58:35.000 And then I was like, Why?
02:58:37.000 Like, I think he got killed.
02:58:38.000 It was like, oh.
02:58:39.000 Bro, there's many, layers to that story.
02:58:42.000 Past the weed.
02:58:43.000 And his wife. 0.53
02:58:45.000 We're in an outdoor bar.
02:58:46.000 Like, yeah, anyway, bro.
02:58:48.000 Pass that over.
02:58:49.000 Pass the weed.
02:58:51.000 There's many levels to that story.
02:58:51.000 It's so good.
02:58:53.000 I don't mean to come down on you, but that's the weed.
02:58:56.000 Oh, man.
02:58:56.000 I don't even know that guy.
02:58:57.000 Past the weed.
02:58:58.000 Dude, I was looking for weed, and it's like he's smoking.
02:59:00.000 I'm like, I'm looking for that weed. 1.00
02:59:02.000 In Guatemala?
02:59:03.000 Yeah, at a bar.
02:59:03.000 What is the legality of weed in Guatemala?
02:59:06.000 Same as, like, five years ago here.
02:59:08.000 Like, Do it quite a bit.
02:59:10.000 Oh, you can get arrested, though.
02:59:12.000 And you wind up in a Guatemalan jail. 0.99
02:59:14.000 Imagine if we had to bail you out like fucking the 18th. 1.00
02:59:17.000 I don't know. 0.99
02:59:17.000 We wouldn't even know. 0.99
02:59:18.000 We would never bail you out.
02:59:19.000 I would.
02:59:20.000 I'd go there.
02:59:21.000 Let him sit there for a little.
02:59:22.000 Nah.
02:59:23.000 You would fly to Guatemala?
02:59:24.000 100%.
02:59:25.000 100%. 1.00
02:59:26.000 Yeah, if I was in jail in Guatemala, 100% we'd get him out. 1.00
02:59:28.000 Nah, that'd be fun, though, to let him sit for a few days. 1.00
02:59:31.000 Yeah.
02:59:31.000 He needs to learn his lessons.
02:59:32.000 I can't stop going to Guatemala.
02:59:33.000 Of course, I'm going to get weed.
02:59:35.000 I'm the guy who gets weed.
02:59:36.000 The lesson is keep getting weed, man.
02:59:38.000 We'd have to go get him.
02:59:39.000 I'd make you guys come with me.
02:59:40.000 We'd have to film it. 0.99
02:59:42.000 Yeah, protect our parts from a fucking national park in Guatemala. 0.99
02:59:46.000 Whoever filmed your fucking, that whole run that you did, that guy, he'll put some witty quotes. 0.99
02:59:51.000 Get him in there. 1.00
02:59:53.000 Get Ari in there. 1.00
02:59:54.000 State of emergency. 1.00
02:59:54.000 Look at this. 1.00
02:59:56.000 Gang prisons.
02:59:57.000 Prison rods and the gangs. 1.00
02:59:58.000 You'd be in that gang getting fucked. 1.00
03:00:00.000 Good to get you back in the camps. 1.00
03:00:02.000 I can't have you in there, Ari. 1.00
03:00:03.000 Getting fucked by these Guatemalan guys. 1.00
03:00:04.000 Dude, those guys who gave me weed who told me about Charlie Kirk, they were like, what do you think about Trump? 1.00
03:00:08.000 I'm like, I don't really know.
03:00:10.000 And then I figured out how to.
03:00:11.000 Turn it away from that conversation.
03:00:12.000 I go, How's your guy? 1.00
03:00:13.000 And they go, Our guy sucks. 1.00
03:00:16.000 He's so crooked. 1.00
03:00:17.000 No, it was somebody in Guatemala. 0.98
03:00:17.000 Maduro? 0.98
03:00:19.000 Oh, sorry.
03:00:20.000 You just turn it on their guy. 0.98
03:00:20.000 Wrong country. 0.98
03:00:22.000 They love talking about it.
03:00:23.000 Yeah, it's not Maduro.
03:00:24.000 It's far away.
03:00:25.000 Yeah, it's not Maduro. 0.98
03:00:26.000 It's like, He's crooked. 0.58
03:00:27.000 He takes money from corporations.
03:00:29.000 I'm like, Yeah, we do that.
03:00:30.000 Boo.
03:00:31.000 Yeah. 0.99
03:00:31.000 Better than El Salvador. 0.99
03:00:32.000 That place is even crazier.
03:00:34.000 No, what they did is they stopped all the crimes.
03:00:37.000 Didn't they stop a ton of gangs?
03:00:39.000 They threw them all into giant prisons and stopped all the crimes.
03:00:43.000 They drove them out, killed the rest.
03:00:45.000 Can we do that? 1.00
03:00:46.000 Their crime dropped off of the fucking story here, Mark. 0.99
03:00:49.000 Yeah, I guess so. 0.99
03:00:50.000 No, that guy is a hero to everyone there.
03:00:52.000 They all love him.
03:00:52.000 We should do that.
03:00:53.000 Look at this.
03:00:54.000 Agreed.
03:00:56.000 Everyone who was there loves him.
03:00:57.000 Everyone who came in later was like, oh, so so.
03:00:59.000 That's El Salvador's prison. 0.99
03:01:00.000 We should do that to our civilians. 1.00
03:01:01.000 Look at the guy in the back. 0.98
03:01:03.000 He's kind of fat.
03:01:04.000 Doesn't seem well.
03:01:05.000 I bet there's a few guys in there that don't belong.
03:01:08.000 Yeah, no.
03:01:09.000 There's a story here that anyone with a tattoo could get arrested.
03:01:12.000 And they're like, no, no.
03:01:13.000 It's anyone with a tattoo of a cop you've killed with his badge number that can get arrested.
03:01:17.000 They captured all the Nate Diazs.
03:01:19.000 All Nate.
03:01:19.000 Yeah, they do look like Nate.
03:01:22.000 It's just Nate.
03:01:23.000 They're all going to stand up and go, what's up?
03:01:25.000 We got their country back. 0.99
03:01:26.000 Damn, the tattoo guys are cleaning up out there. 0.99
03:01:29.000 Let's see if we can see the badge tattoos. 0.99
03:01:29.000 Wait, wait. 0.99
03:01:31.000 When you tattoo your face up like that, you are not fucking around. 1.00
03:01:35.000 So a lot of the face tattoos are loved ones they've raped. 1.00
03:01:38.000 No. 0.96
03:01:40.000 No, I didn't just make it up. 1.00
03:01:41.000 You get extra points for raping a mom, a sister, an aunt. 0.99
03:01:41.000 What? 0.99
03:01:44.000 Your own mom?
03:01:45.000 Yeah, buddy.
03:01:46.000 Wow.
03:01:47.000 This can't.
03:01:48.000 It wasn't a great situation.
03:01:50.000 Where are you coming up with this? 1.00
03:01:51.000 Talking to El Salvadorans. 1.00
03:01:53.000 Oh my God. 0.98
03:01:53.000 In El Salvador. 0.98
03:01:54.000 I think your Spanish was a little broken.
03:01:56.000 They had a soccer team.
03:01:57.000 That was non existent.
03:01:58.000 They had a soccer team.
03:01:59.000 Did you have Spanish at all?
03:02:00.000 Oh, yeah.
03:02:01.000 They had a soccer game.
03:02:02.000 Say something.
03:02:03.000 Order pizza.
03:02:05.000 Yo quiero una pizza.
03:02:07.000 Porfa.
03:02:08.000 Oh, come on.
03:02:09.000 That was Yo quiero Taco Bell with pizza. 0.95
03:02:11.000 They had a soccer game they played in Port Town where they cut babies out of a woman and play soccer with it. 0.99
03:02:17.000 Oh, my God. 0.98
03:02:18.000 Hey, make soccer interesting.
03:02:20.000 Their gangs are trained by the U.S., but pretty strong.
03:02:25.000 So they got rid of them.
03:02:26.000 But what they did was nuts, though.
03:02:28.000 They just made these giant super prisons and just put everybody in there, and the crime dropped off a cliff. 1.00
03:02:34.000 Damn. 0.99
03:02:35.000 I went to Independence Day parade there. 0.99
03:02:37.000 It was wild how much everyone is like, What are you doing here?
03:02:40.000 This is wild.
03:02:41.000 Our guy is the best.
03:02:43.000 It's the only country where they're like, We love our guy.
03:02:45.000 Everyone else, we hate our guy.
03:02:45.000 It was wild.
03:02:47.000 They love their guy.
03:02:47.000 They wouldn't even let everyone in.
03:02:49.000 You got a Nicaragua. 0.99
03:02:51.000 Yeah. 1.00
03:02:51.000 They wouldn't let Ari into Nicaragua. 1.00
03:02:53.000 Fake news.
03:02:54.000 They love that guy.
03:02:54.000 Fake news.
03:02:56.000 They love that guy.
03:02:57.000 It was the first time they could go out in public and like, and like, and like, what's his name?
03:03:02.000 What's the name of the El Sal?
03:03:03.000 He's half Arab. 1.00
03:03:05.000 They don't care. 1.00
03:03:06.000 What kind of Arab? 1.00
03:03:06.000 I don't know. 1.00
03:03:08.000 The good kind.
03:03:10.000 Is there? 1.00
03:03:10.000 Not Palestinian. 1.00
03:03:11.000 No, no, no. 1.00
03:03:12.000 I just mean.
03:03:14.000 Wow. 0.91
03:03:14.000 Is it Jewish? 0.91
03:03:15.000 No, no. 1.00
03:03:15.000 I bet. 1.00
03:03:16.000 It's not supported.
03:03:17.000 The claim that specific face tattoos in El Salvador mark someone who has raped a family member is not supported by credible evidence.
03:03:24.000 By the way, what credible evidence do you get?
03:03:26.000 Talk to so many people there, so disagree with this.
03:03:31.000 It's hard to know because how many people are documenting this stuff in peer reviewed papers?
03:03:37.000 What is perplexity drawing from?
03:03:37.000 You know what I mean?
03:03:40.000 Yeah.
03:03:40.000 People on the streets are like, this is what happens.
03:03:42.000 Yeah.
03:03:43.000 Well, I'm sure a lot of it did happen.
03:03:45.000 I'm sure a lot of it happened. 0.97
03:03:47.000 There was a guy that used to be the fucking doorman at the improv, and he showed me this cartel video of this guy getting eaten by a pit bull. 0.97
03:03:54.000 And it still haunts my dreams. 0.99
03:03:56.000 The guy was tied up, arms and legs, and the pit bull was eating his dick. 0.99
03:04:00.000 The pit bull was just completely locked on this guy's cross, and this guy was screaming. 0.99
03:04:06.000 Michael Dick.
03:04:07.000 And he goes, hey, man, check this out.
03:04:09.000 My friend sent me this from the cartel.
03:04:10.000 And I'm like, why are you showing me this thing?
03:04:12.000 I have to go on stage in 20 minutes. 0.99
03:04:15.000 Oh, damn. 0.99
03:04:17.000 I was trying to do the sound. 0.99
03:04:19.000 I couldn't do it.
03:04:20.000 In my head, I was thinking about doing it.
03:04:22.000 I couldn't think of it.
03:04:23.000 What?
03:04:24.000 That was pretty good. 1.00
03:04:25.000 I was like, damn. 1.00
03:04:26.000 That was damn. 1.00
03:04:27.000 Just Michael Winslow. 1.00
03:04:30.000 Just that this giant headed pit bull was locked on this guy's dick and he was screaming, and I've never forgot it. 0.99
03:04:34.000 Well, yeah, the internet hit us at different ages like that because I got hit with those when I was young. 0.99
03:04:40.000 And I was like, that's enough.
03:04:42.000 Yeah, they're not fun.
03:04:43.000 But if I was an adult and somebody showed me something horrific like that, that does stick with you.
03:04:47.000 Oh, me and Segura, we have a text chain. 0.99
03:04:49.000 Me and Segura, it's the war shit that either one of us find on the internet. 0.93
03:04:53.000 They don't really toss those around anymore. 0.99
03:04:55.000 The cartoon videos.
03:04:56.000 Yeah, this was someone who was a cop sent it to this guy, and then this guy showed me. 1.00
03:05:03.000 God, the shit cops must see. 1.00
03:05:05.000 Oh, right. 1.00
03:05:06.000 Tough. 1.00
03:05:06.000 They need the Ibogaine. 1.00
03:05:08.000 They got a high suicide rate.
03:05:09.000 Oh, very high.
03:05:10.000 Very high.
03:05:11.000 All first responders, they all have much higher suicide rates than the general population.
03:05:15.000 That's not normal to see that much damage.
03:05:18.000 Imagine you're a guy who just shows up at car accidents every day.
03:05:21.000 Every day you see one, you're like, I got to go to therapy.
03:05:23.000 You see a family.
03:05:23.000 Right.
03:05:24.000 Three a week. 1.00
03:05:25.000 Legs and splatter and dead babies and fucking moms. 1.00
03:05:29.000 Have somebody go, am I going to be okay? 1.00
03:05:30.000 And you're like, you look at his arm and leg over there and you're like, ah.
03:05:34.000 And people hate you on top of that.
03:05:34.000 Yeah.
03:05:36.000 That's true.
03:05:37.000 You can't win. 0.99
03:05:37.000 That sucks. 0.99
03:05:38.000 Especially cops. 0.99
03:05:40.000 But first responders, people don't even hate you.
03:05:42.000 Nobody really hates ambulance drivers.
03:05:43.000 No.
03:05:43.000 No, or firemen.
03:05:45.000 Or firemen, yeah. 0.87
03:05:47.000 That's crooked.
03:05:47.000 Well.
03:05:48.000 What?
03:05:49.000 They're not.
03:05:50.000 Boys, we've got to wrap this up.
03:05:50.000 What?
03:05:54.000 I don't think we did.
03:05:55.000 We just started.
03:05:55.000 We did.
03:05:57.000 We just got going.
03:05:59.000 JMo's drunk.
03:06:00.000 You're not going anywhere, brother. 0.81
03:06:01.000 You're going to bong another beer.
03:06:02.000 I got to do a thing soon.
03:06:03.000 What do you think? 0.99
03:06:04.000 What the fuck is that? 0.99
03:06:05.000 You got to do a thing in your construction. 1.00
03:06:07.000 Tonight?
03:06:08.000 Yeah, I got to go to a thing.
03:06:09.000 Oh, you got to reek a booze.
03:06:10.000 I'm going to be drunk for this.
03:06:11.000 You can bong one more and then that's it, show.
03:06:13.000 Allegedly.
03:06:13.000 What do you got?
03:06:14.000 A class play?
03:06:15.000 One thing.
03:06:16.000 I got to go to a thing.
03:06:17.000 Show and tell?
03:06:18.000 You can bong a beer.
03:06:19.000 I can't.
03:06:19.000 PTA?
03:06:20.000 You can bong a beer before it does.
03:06:20.000 I can't.
03:06:23.000 I got to be out of here in a little bit.
03:06:23.000 No.
03:06:25.000 A talent show?
03:06:26.000 I got to go to the bathroom one more time, but we're not ending here.
03:06:28.000 How many times have you gone to the bathroom?
03:06:28.000 One shooter.
03:06:30.000 30 on three.
03:06:31.000 I've gone once. 1.00
03:06:32.000 Fucking dirty, you drinking on that competition with you? 1.00
03:06:32.000 Yeah. 1.00
03:06:35.000 Yeah, you're sipping a fucking bullseye. 1.00
03:06:37.000 I haven't even seen you refill anything. 1.00
03:06:39.000 I make the noise every time.
03:06:41.000 Twice.
03:06:42.000 Twice.
03:06:42.000 That's true.
03:06:43.000 I remember the noise twice.
03:06:47.000 So nice to be back, boys.
03:06:48.000 It is.
03:06:49.000 This is so fun.
03:06:49.000 It is good to be back.
03:06:50.000 It is good to be back.
03:06:51.000 Speaking of the moment, this might be the best one.
03:06:53.000 We missed you, dude.
03:06:54.000 It was weird not knowing where you were.
03:06:56.000 I was very uncomfortable.
03:06:57.000 I didn't like it.
03:06:58.000 Sorry.
03:06:58.000 I was completely fine with it.
03:07:01.000 Dude, when I texted you when I was back, you're like, who is this? 0.88
03:07:04.000 I was like, Hey, it's the Jew. 0.99
03:07:06.000 I'd say very specific things like, who is this? 1.00
03:07:08.000 I'm like, you know, the fuck it is. 1.00
03:07:09.000 And you're like, yes, motherfucker. 1.00
03:07:10.000 Well, I still get a million. 1.00
03:07:12.000 I started getting text messages from an unknown number that like knew things about me. 1.00
03:07:16.000 I'm like, who the fuck is this? 0.99
03:07:17.000 Yes, you did that. 0.99
03:07:18.000 But I've been meaning to change my phone number for so long. 0.99
03:07:21.000 Like, every time a new one comes in, I'm like, oh, fuck this. 0.98
03:07:24.000 I got the same one since seven years ago. 0.99
03:07:26.000 Here we go.
03:07:26.000 Oh, here we go.
03:07:27.000 Let's go.
03:07:29.000 Oh, kids. 1.00
03:07:32.000 This is Moscow, whores. 1.00
03:07:35.000 Oh, no. 1.00
03:07:35.000 No. 1.00
03:07:36.000 This is Florida.
03:07:37.000 Open Coliseum.
03:07:38.000 Oakland.
03:07:39.000 Wow.
03:07:40.000 Oakland was light.
03:07:41.000 This is where the Raiders played.
03:07:45.000 Pity.
03:07:46.000 Oh, yeah.
03:07:47.000 I will never get tired of this song.
03:07:49.000 Wow.
03:07:50.000 I'll never get tired of this song.
03:07:54.000 We can't go out on this because they can't hear it. 0.90
03:07:55.000 We got a bong one. 1.00
03:07:59.000 Wait, they actually are not allowed to hear this?
03:08:01.000 I don't know.
03:08:02.000 Right?
03:08:02.000 Sometimes they say that.
03:08:02.000 We'll see what happens.
03:08:04.000 But yeah, that's a hell of a tune. 0.99
03:08:06.000 Let's get JMo one.
03:08:07.000 I went to see them recently and checked the whole game.
03:08:09.000 Really?
03:08:10.000 Yeah, but it's like. 0.98
03:08:11.000 We give JMo one. 0.97
03:08:12.000 I will.
03:08:13.000 So many people are dead.
03:08:14.000 I thought it was a band.
03:08:14.000 Right.
03:08:15.000 You got to see it when they're all there.
03:08:17.000 Yeah.
03:08:17.000 It's like.
03:08:18.000 It's like.
03:08:19.000 It's a tribute band a little bit.
03:08:21.000 They did great.
03:08:22.000 It was still the great songs.
03:08:24.000 But Party is like, ah, I wish the real guys were alive.
03:08:27.000 It's like if you want to see a Hendrix tribute band, you just get sad.
03:08:31.000 Tribute band.
03:08:31.000 Right.
03:08:32.000 Yeah.
03:08:32.000 You just get sad.
03:08:33.000 Like I missed Hendrix.
03:08:34.000 I don't want to miss Step again.
03:08:36.000 Well, you know what's weird?
03:08:37.000 It's like Journey.
03:08:38.000 They have like that guy, Steve.
03:08:40.000 What is his name?
03:08:41.000 The lead singer of Journey?
03:08:42.000 Steve.
03:08:43.000 What's Steve Perry.
03:08:43.000 Steve Perry.
03:08:44.000 He's still alive.
03:08:45.000 And he doesn't sing for Journey anymore.
03:08:45.000 Yeah.
03:08:47.000 There's another guy who sings for Journey.
03:08:48.000 He's like a Filipino drummer. 1.00
03:08:49.000 You can replace drummer.
03:08:50.000 You can place guitars.
03:08:51.000 You cannot replace lead singer.
03:08:53.000 No way.
03:08:53.000 Right.
03:08:53.000 Exactly.
03:08:54.000 You need a front man.
03:08:56.000 Jameson? 0.84
03:08:56.000 Although I saw Foreigner. 0.84
03:08:58.000 Really?
03:08:59.000 With the new guy.
03:09:00.000 Were they cooking?
03:09:00.000 How was it?
03:09:01.000 I was so excited.
03:09:02.000 Yeah?
03:09:03.000 See Jukebox Hero Live?
03:09:04.000 I saw that.
03:09:05.000 Jukebox Hero.
03:09:06.000 Foreigner Sticks and Def Leppard.
03:09:09.000 I was there for Foreigner.
03:09:11.000 And then I worked in a factory the next day at 4 a.m. 0.99
03:09:13.000 Damn. 1.00
03:09:14.000 That shit sucked. 1.00
03:09:16.000 What kind of factory? 1.00
03:09:17.000 What are you making?
03:09:18.000 Ice cream.
03:09:18.000 No way.
03:09:19.000 I shoveled glue into a machine for 12 hours the next day.
03:09:22.000 Glue?
03:09:23.000 Glue's in your face.
03:09:25.000 Did you just throw up?
03:09:26.000 Yeah, we were making the packaging.
03:09:28.000 Glue?
03:09:29.000 We made the packaging.
03:09:29.000 That was crazy.
03:09:31.000 Did you get free ice cream?
03:09:32.000 That's crazy.
03:09:34.000 You could stick your hand in the ice cream.
03:09:36.000 We don't make ice cream.
03:09:37.000 We make the packaging. 1.00
03:09:40.000 Glue into a machine sounds like fucking a sex doll. 0.99
03:09:42.000 It was, yeah, a lot of glue. 1.00
03:09:45.000 Ari, when do you decide when you're going to do these walkabouts?
03:09:48.000 Like, how far out?
03:09:50.000 Well, in advance.
03:09:52.000 Probably like a year.
03:09:53.000 So, like, how much time between now and the next walkabout?
03:09:55.000 No plans for the next one.
03:09:56.000 You've done Asia, you've done South America. 1.00
03:09:58.000 Go to Ghana. 1.00
03:10:13.000 Go to fucking Gaza. 1.00
03:10:15.000 I don't know where it'd be next. 1.00
03:10:17.000 Gaza's got no good coffee shops. 1.00
03:10:17.000 I dare you. 1.00
03:10:19.000 Not anymore.
03:10:21.000 They're roasted.
03:10:21.000 I bet they did.
03:10:22.000 They definitely did.
03:10:24.000 Off the cuff.
03:10:24.000 Jesus Christ.
03:10:27.000 Off the cuff. 1.00
03:10:28.000 You son of a bitch. 1.00
03:10:31.000 Yeah, I don't know where else. 1.00
03:10:32.000 Yeah, where else?
03:10:32.000 Good job.
03:10:32.000 Yeah, where?
03:10:33.000 I want to go back to Asia. 0.99
03:10:33.000 You've done everything. 0.99
03:10:34.000 There's more of Asia. 0.88
03:10:35.000 Philippines, man. 0.87
03:10:35.000 She goes a lot to Asia. 0.87
03:10:36.000 This is all I know.
03:10:37.000 I really want to go to the Philippines. 0.97
03:10:38.000 Bombshell sex harassment suit against. 0.98
03:10:40.000 Who's that guy? 1.00
03:10:41.000 Lorna Hodgkin.
03:10:42.000 This video has nothing to do with it.
03:10:43.000 JP Morgan branded complete fabrication as John Doe Unmasked.
03:10:48.000 That's the story we were talking about earlier today.
03:10:48.000 What is this you're showing us?
03:10:50.000 Oh, with the lady?
03:10:51.000 That's the guy who made up the story?
03:10:52.000 Yeah.
03:10:54.000 That's the guy.
03:10:54.000 That's the guy.
03:10:56.000 So this is the guy who worked.
03:10:57.000 I knew it was fabricated.
03:10:58.000 Bregal, Sukamount, Toronto.
03:10:59.000 So everything is fabricated.
03:11:01.000 Everything in the world is fabricated.
03:11:04.000 Let me see the guy.
03:11:05.000 So, what is this? 0.89
03:11:06.000 Go down and show the girl. 1.00
03:11:08.000 Indian Jared Fogel. 1.00
03:11:10.000 Oh, hello. 1.00
03:11:11.000 Think of her being like, not that wood.
03:11:14.000 But imagine her. 1.00
03:11:15.000 She's walking around and everybody thinks that she said those horrible things and talked about her tits like they're cannons. 1.00
03:11:19.000 Cannons. 0.99
03:11:20.000 I'm so sorry.
03:11:21.000 You're feeling embarrassed about your bush.
03:11:23.000 I'm not embarrassed.
03:11:24.000 So, this guy just made it all up?
03:11:26.000 Is that the alleged?
03:11:26.000 Yeah, look at him.
03:11:27.000 Come on, I got a corny man. 1.00
03:11:29.000 He's got a fucking Leno nose. 1.00
03:11:29.000 The virgin. 1.00
03:11:30.000 Hmm.
03:11:31.000 Yeah, he does.
03:11:33.000 Have you seen this?
03:11:34.000 Have you heard about this?
03:11:35.000 Now deleted court papers.
03:11:36.000 Ah, the cannons.
03:11:38.000 Ah, he fell down a hill. 1.00
03:11:39.000 Whoa, he even turned up unannounced at Rana's apartment and forced him to have sex. 0.99
03:11:44.000 Oh, that was the lie. 0.99
03:11:46.000 That was a lie.
03:11:48.000 Well, good for her.
03:11:49.000 She's been exonerated. 1.00
03:11:50.000 This lady got to force you to have sex. 1.00
03:11:52.000 She categorically denies the allegation. 1.00
03:11:55.000 She never engaged in any inappropriate conduct with this individual of any kind and has never been to the location where the alleged sexual assault supposedly took place.
03:12:04.000 It's not sexual assault if a girl. 0.71
03:12:05.000 No.
03:12:06.000 Yeah, what if he forced you?
03:12:07.000 Like, what are we talking about?
03:12:08.000 Go, come on.
03:12:09.000 Just say come on 20 times in a row. 0.99
03:12:11.000 Sexually assault a guy. 1.00
03:12:12.000 I lost my Virginia to a hooker when I was 16. 0.98
03:12:15.000 She was probably 50. 1.00
03:12:16.000 It was the best night of my life.
03:12:18.000 Oh, man.
03:12:18.000 I'm a survivor.
03:12:19.000 Look at that.
03:12:20.000 They're posting pretty pictures. 0.98
03:12:22.000 What about Winona Ryder?
03:12:23.000 You heard about her on Jamiroquai?
03:12:25.000 What? 0.99
03:12:25.000 No, Jamiroquai and her used to fuck, and he said I couldn't keep up with her. 0.99
03:12:29.000 She wanted to bang so much. 1.00
03:12:30.000 Wow.
03:12:31.000 It was, like, annoying.
03:12:32.000 Jamiroquai's making a comeback.
03:12:34.000 I believe he should have never.
03:12:35.000 He should have never.
03:12:36.000 Yeah.
03:12:36.000 I know.
03:12:37.000 It's not a good song.
03:12:37.000 It's still a huge in general.
03:12:38.000 Think about it. 1.00
03:12:39.000 He said she had huge tits and it was a problem. 1.00
03:12:41.000 They were bigger than they looked. 1.00
03:12:42.000 Pull it up, J Mo. 1.00
03:12:43.000 I'd try to do it. 1.00
03:12:44.000 You've got to train for that.
03:12:44.000 You've got to work out.
03:12:45.000 You've got to go.
03:12:46.000 You've got to be prepared for that level of the game.
03:12:48.000 Yeah.
03:12:49.000 He wasn't ready.
03:12:50.000 The lights were too bright.
03:12:51.000 How crazy is that? 0.99
03:12:53.000 With Nona Ryder, like, imagine kicking her out of bed. 1.00
03:12:55.000 Like, you want to fuck too much. 1.00
03:12:56.000 And this is like 30 years ago. 0.99
03:12:58.000 You're sad about it.
03:12:58.000 You're going to Jamura Kwai?
03:13:01.000 Jamie, delete that.
03:13:02.000 Jamie.
03:13:03.000 Nope.
03:13:03.000 No, keep it in.
03:13:04.000 Keep it in.
03:13:05.000 It was actually good, but you're just, it's your legibility is the issue.
03:13:08.000 It's a really good joke.
03:13:12.000 If I said it, we'd all be going.
03:13:15.000 That's weird.
03:13:15.000 Quiet is such a weird name.
03:13:17.000 What was his big song?
03:13:18.000 He had that one really good song.
03:13:19.000 Virtual Insanity.
03:13:21.000 It big is. 0.99
03:13:22.000 Sick ass music video where he was dancing. 0.99
03:13:24.000 He danced a really cool, yeah. 1.00
03:13:24.000 Oh, wow. 1.00
03:13:26.000 No, Jamar Kart.
03:13:26.000 Yeah, that one.
03:13:27.000 What was the song? 1.00
03:13:28.000 Oh, Huge Mommy Milkers is what he said about her tits. 0.99
03:13:30.000 There was a bunch of memes going around. 1.00
03:13:32.000 No thanks.
03:13:33.000 Are we sure that this is true, though?
03:13:34.000 Did he really say this?
03:13:35.000 There it is.
03:13:37.000 What's a Mommy Milker?
03:13:38.000 The memes about the shocking viral story. 1.00
03:13:40.000 Look how hot she was. 0.98
03:13:41.000 She was very attractive. 1.00
03:13:42.000 Big dropings. 1.00
03:13:43.000 She was hot and she liked to shoplift. 1.00
03:13:44.000 She's your kind of girl, Norm. 1.00
03:13:45.000 Oh, yeah.
03:13:46.000 Big fan.
03:13:47.000 We shoplift together.
03:13:48.000 Oh, yeah.
03:13:49.000 I'll show her some strange things.
03:13:50.000 Wow. 1.00
03:13:51.000 Her boobs are too big and she wanted to have sex all the time. 1.00
03:13:54.000 Why do they have to cross out sex? 1.00
03:13:56.000 What happened to America? 1.00
03:13:57.000 It's an algorithm thing.
03:13:58.000 It's just like things don't get surprised.
03:14:00.000 I know.
03:14:01.000 But it's too big.
03:14:02.000 Well, it's everything.
03:14:03.000 What does that mean?
03:14:04.000 You know, on TikTok, you can't use a juice box emoji.
03:14:08.000 That's right. 1.00
03:14:08.000 There's people using it for the Jews. 1.00
03:14:10.000 Yes.
03:14:11.000 But we love juice boxes.
03:14:12.000 Yeah, but they don't want to. 0.92
03:14:14.000 They don't want you to crap on it.
03:14:14.000 A free juice box?
03:14:16.000 A free juice box, buddy. 1.00
03:14:17.000 Jews are all about that. 1.00
03:14:18.000 But now the Jews own TikTok. 1.00
03:14:20.000 That's right. 1.00
03:14:21.000 Really?
03:14:22.000 I think.
03:14:22.000 Did it go through?
03:14:23.000 Yeah.
03:14:23.000 What's that guy doing?
03:14:24.000 But they took it from China and sold it to.
03:14:26.000 They purchased it at a reasonable rate.
03:14:28.000 Ellison?
03:14:29.000 Yeah. 0.64
03:14:30.000 Ellison's Jewish? 0.88
03:14:32.000 Yeah, see that face. 0.81
03:14:33.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
03:14:33.000 Larry also.
03:14:34.000 You see the mug.
03:14:35.000 It looks like his mantle.
03:14:37.000 That's true.
03:14:38.000 Yeah, I think, well, it's like they own TikTok now, and I think they're trying to own.
03:14:44.000 The weather.
03:14:45.000 ABC.
03:14:46.000 The weather.
03:14:48.000 Was that thing true about Iran?
03:14:50.000 That, like, they shot down some weather station, and then all of a sudden it started raining like crazy in Iran?
03:14:55.000 Oh. 0.99
03:14:55.000 But then I read that that's horseshit. 0.99
03:14:57.000 And that they experienced the same amount of rain every year. 0.96
03:15:00.000 So that's the thing.
03:15:01.000 You can't buy into all those.
03:15:03.000 Those are conspiracies created by.
03:15:05.000 Aha. 1.00
03:15:06.000 They go, you guys are dumb as shit. 1.00
03:15:06.000 You guys are hilarious. 1.00
03:15:08.000 You'll believe we created the weather.
03:15:10.000 Well, that's true.
03:15:10.000 And then when you say that, control it.
03:15:12.000 Control it, of course.
03:15:13.000 But then you go, but you definitely bombed kids.
03:15:17.000 And that's not a conspiracy.
03:15:19.000 Right.
03:15:20.000 But also, they bombed everybody.
03:15:21.000 The U.S. has bombed way more children.
03:15:25.000 It was stolen right now.
03:15:26.000 What do you mean?
03:15:27.000 So the United States has killed way more children than what you're talking about.
03:15:31.000 Oh, but that's true.
03:15:32.000 Can we do this the way you guys did, where it was.
03:15:35.000 Look at this story.
03:15:36.000 Yeah, you guys.
03:15:37.000 I don't know.
03:15:37.000 Well, you're.
03:15:39.000 Going against the U.S. Shane, look at this story.
03:15:41.000 As fighting escalated and air corridors were restricted, social media posts alleged that cloud seeding aircraft used by the U.S. and its allies have been grounded, causing stolen rains to return. 0.55
03:15:51.000 So we've been stealing rains from Iran for a long time?
03:15:54.000 Wow, look at that. 0.95
03:15:56.000 Look how dope that building is.
03:15:57.000 Look at that building. 1.00
03:15:58.000 Is that an Iranian building? 1.00
03:16:00.000 That building is dope as fuck. 1.00
03:16:00.000 Looks like it. 1.00
03:16:02.000 That ain't believable.
03:16:03.000 This ain't tax.
03:16:03.000 We should make a.
03:16:05.000 When I buy a ranch, we should make that our podcast studio.
03:16:10.000 I don't know.
03:16:11.000 Don't make it look just like that.
03:16:13.000 I'm not sure you want that kind of thing.
03:16:14.000 Maybe AI is going to detect it.
03:16:15.000 See what it says on the outside.
03:16:18.000 Maybe it says something cool. 1.00
03:16:20.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
03:16:21.000 In Arabic? 1.00
03:16:22.000 It says America. 1.00
03:16:24.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
03:16:24.000 America. 1.00
03:16:25.000 In Arabic. 1.00
03:16:26.000 The Arabic writing is dope as fuck, though. 0.98
03:16:28.000 It looks cool. 0.98
03:16:29.000 It looks pretty slick.
03:16:30.000 They invented writing?
03:16:31.000 Well, numbers, I should say.
03:16:31.000 Where'd you hear that?
03:16:33.000 I thought that was great.
03:16:34.000 They came up with numbers.
03:16:35.000 I'll give them that. 1.00
03:16:35.000 What did Greek do? 1.00
03:16:36.000 But look, thanks, guys.
03:16:37.000 What a great episode we had.
03:16:38.000 We had a good time.
03:16:39.000 Hey, should we get dinner?
03:16:41.000 I'm starving.
03:16:42.000 Fun times, boys.
03:16:44.000 Oh, jeez.
03:16:45.000 Next one.
03:16:46.000 Two months.
03:16:46.000 Next one.
03:16:47.000 Let's do two months.
03:16:48.000 Let's keep them regular.
03:16:50.000 Two months.
03:16:50.000 Come on.
03:16:51.000 We can do it.
03:16:52.000 I can do two months.
03:16:52.000 Come on.
03:16:53.000 We're in May right now.
03:16:54.000 Is it May yet?
03:16:55.000 It's close.
03:16:56.000 Tomorrow's first.
03:16:57.000 Tomorrow's the day?
03:16:58.000 Today, when it comes out, it's May 1st.
03:16:58.000 Yeah.
03:17:00.000 A lot of editing for JMO.
03:17:00.000 These guys go.
03:17:02.000 Well, the end.
03:17:03.000 Just the end part.
03:17:04.000 Speaking of the end, this is the end.
03:17:06.000 This is the end.
03:17:07.000 Available at arishafir.com right now, starring Shane Gillis and Mark Norman.
03:17:09.000 Available at arishafir.com.
03:17:12.000 There it is.
03:17:13.000 Look at all those people.
03:17:13.000 The end.
03:17:14.000 Look how terrible Bubba Son of a bitch. 1.00
03:17:17.000 You belong in that period of time. 1.00
03:17:19.000 I wish.
03:17:20.000 I got a Netflix special out.
03:17:21.000 Check it out.
03:17:22.000 Let's bump it back up and choose the stories. 1.00
03:17:25.000 Let's fuck it. 1.00
03:17:25.000 We might be drunk. 1.00
03:17:26.000 Let's go. 1.00
03:17:27.000 Jews killed Jesus. 1.00
03:17:29.000 Tires, new season. 1.00
03:17:30.000 When's the new season coming out?
03:17:31.000 I don't know if I'm allowed to say.
03:17:33.000 Should be around August.
03:17:34.000 Okay.
03:17:35.000 Bill.
03:17:35.000 Yeah.
03:17:35.000 Yeah.
03:17:37.000 Love you guys.
03:17:38.000 Love you guys.
03:17:39.000 Shout out to everybody out there listening.
03:17:41.000 The parks are saved.
03:17:42.000 Jihad. 0.99