The Joe Rogan Experience - October 14, 2015


Joe Rogan Experience #708 - Steven Crowder

Topics
Altered States movie alligator and crocodile education Asian carp whales in real life taking things out of context GOP debates cat food Marlon Brando and James Dean comparisons deer hunting in PA wealthy 1% gun show loophole armed security fabric laws Dave Foley divorce story professional victimhood Gonzo journalism perspiration problem Culinary Union in Nevada mutual combat domestic abuse cases domestic violence martial arts politics George St. Pierre and Robbie Lawler training
Hosted by
Joe Rogan
Guests
Steven Crowder
Mentioned
Ben Carson Lena Dunham David Bowie McJagher Chuck Liddell James Dean Sarah Silverman Bernie Sanders Muhammad Ali Amy Schumer Alex Jones George St. Pierre Clint Eastwood Marlon Brando Sean King Harrison Greenbaum Eddie Cummins Tony Camacho Jesus Christ Ronda Rousey Val Kilmer and 130 more
Joe Rogan Experience #707 - Michael Dowd Joe Rogan Experience #709 - Steven Rinella

Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 58 minutes

Words per minute

219.03

Word count

39,096

Sentence count

4,549

Harmful content

Misogyny

173

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1,066

sentences flagged

Hate speech

213

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Steven Crowder is a stand-up comic, actor, podcaster, and podcaster. He's known for his impressions of J.J. Simpson, Harrison Ford, and many other characters, but he's also known as "J.C." Steven Crowder joins Jemele to discuss how he got his start on the internet, and what it's like being an impressionist in the 90s and early 2000s. He also talks about how he went from being a podcaster to being an actor, and why he thinks it's a good thing he's not Jewish or gay. Plus, he talks about what it was like growing up in the 70s and 80s and how he ended up doing impressions in the early 90s, and how it all led him to a career in comedy and impressions. And he explains why he doesn't want to be mistaken for a Jew. And he also explains why it's not a bad thing to be a "mono." or a "jufag" or a "fag . and why you shouldn't call someone a "Jufag when they re not "a Jew or a gay." And, of course, he also gives us a list of his favorite movies and TV shows that he grew up watching and listening to when he was a kid, and the movies that got him interested in them. And, you can watch them on Amazon Prime Video and other streaming services like Netflix and Amazon Prime. and other places. Enjoy! Logo by Courtney DeKorte and other good links. Music by Skynyrdave Produced and produced by Riley Bray Music and sound design by Jeff Kaale Artwork by Bobby Lord Thank you for all your support and support and your support is greatly appreciated. Please don't forget to leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! Subscribe, rate, review, and subscribe to our podcast on Podchaser, and tell us what you're listening to us on your favorite streaming platform, and we'll get a shoutout in next week's episode on the next episode of That's a big thank you'll be getting a discount on a new episode of the next week, next week! Thanks for listening to the podcast, and a shout out on your local podcast, too! Shout out to my insta: by , , and I'll be listening out to you!

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 So this is the first one ever live.
00:00:02.000 It says offline.
00:00:03.000 Let's see.
00:00:06.000 There's probably a bit of a delay, right?
00:00:08.000 Just like YouTube or Ustream rather.
00:00:11.000 It says starting.
00:00:12.000 It says offline to me though.
00:00:14.000 Say offline to you?
00:00:21.000 Oh, here we go.
00:00:22.000 Something's happening.
00:00:23.000 I see a spinning wheel.
00:00:26.000 Proud Mary keep on burning. 0.93
00:00:30.000 Big wheel keep on turning.
00:00:32.000 Nope.
00:00:33.000 Yes!
00:00:34.000 Success.
00:00:35.000 Steven Crowder, you are the first official broadcast streamed live on YouTube guest.
00:00:39.000 That's not a good sign.
00:00:40.000 It's a great sign.
00:00:42.000 Why is that bad?
00:00:42.000 Well, you're gonna get some monsters on YouTube.
00:00:46.000 Jufag makes appearances quite a bit when I appear. 0.70
00:00:48.000 I'm not Jewish or gay.
00:00:50.000 Does someone call you a Jufag? 0.85
00:00:51.000 All the time, yeah.
00:00:52.000 Hmm.
00:00:52.000 Yeah, which is funny, because I'm not Jewish or gay.
00:00:54.000 My brother and I did a video when YouTube had just started.
00:00:57.000 It was 2006. So I don't know if you remember, there was a rash of really bad impression videos.
00:01:01.000 It would be like, I'm going to do 100 impressions, and it was some guy doing like Kermit the Frog.
00:01:05.000 Cartoons are not impressions.
00:01:06.000 You're just doing cartoon voices, like at a kid's party.
00:01:08.000 And so I did one where I did these impressions that were really mediocre.
00:01:12.000 But my brother was my Ed McMahon, and he was just laughing his ass off.
00:01:15.000 He just thought it was hilarious.
00:01:17.000 And then it goes on for like five minutes, and then I do a pretty spot-on Harrison Ford impression.
00:01:22.000 My brother's like, you need to work on that one a little bit. 1.00
00:01:26.000 YouTube was new, uncensored, and it's like, you're a Jew fag, and I hope you get AIDS from that Jew fag, not realizing he's my brother. 1.00
00:01:33.000 My brother's not Jewish either. 1.00
00:01:34.000 And there were people who hated it because they thought the impressions were awful.
00:01:37.000 There were people who hated it because they got the joke, and they felt like they'd been shortchanged.
00:01:42.000 And there were people who liked it because they got the joke, and there were people who liked it because for some reason they thought the impressions were good, and they were all fighting, and we were going...
00:01:49.000 What is this?
00:01:50.000 Monsters!
00:01:51.000 But you do realize that you're feeding those monsters by bringing up their actual name, like saying all that stuff.
00:01:58.000 Like you're giving them the attention that they so desperately seek.
00:02:01.000 Is that like poltergeist?
00:02:02.000 Yes.
00:02:03.000 Like Candyman.
00:02:05.000 Candyman! 0.84
00:02:06.000 Candyman! 0.84
00:02:07.000 That's a horrible film.
00:02:08.000 When you go back and watch it, it's not good at all.
00:02:11.000 It's like one of those things you watch when you're a kid and you're scared and you go back and you're like, no, no, trust me, let's watch this.
00:02:15.000 You watch it with your girlfriend and you just wish you would have left it there.
00:02:17.000 Yeah.
00:02:18.000 Do you know what the one did that to me is Altered States.
00:02:21.000 I didn't see Altered States.
00:02:22.000 It was so good.
00:02:23.000 Well, it was what got me into isolation tanks.
00:02:25.000 I was fascinated by it.
00:02:27.000 That's what got me into it.
00:02:28.000 It got me into John Lilly.
00:02:30.000 The whole movie was actually based on this one guy.
00:02:34.000 Not obviously.
00:02:35.000 He didn't really turn into a monkey.
00:02:36.000 Do you remember the movie?
00:02:37.000 The William Hurt movie?
00:02:37.000 I don't remember the film.
00:02:39.000 He got a hold of some crazy psychedelic brew from the Amazon jungle and took it and brought it back to America and had these experiences where he regressed into some monkey.
00:02:58.000 What was that?
00:03:00.000 What was that?
00:03:00.000 That's the noise.
00:03:01.000 Like Larry Flint came in?
00:03:05.000 Is that Larry Flint?
00:03:10.000 Trying to push his wheelchair.
00:03:12.000 I watched it when I was like 15 or something like that.
00:03:14.000 I was in high school, and I was like, whoa, this is so cool. 1.00
00:03:17.000 And then I watched it again when I was like 39, and I was like, oh, this is such a piece of shit. 0.99
00:03:21.000 That happened with me like two weeks ago with my wife, and I feel ashamed. 0.99
00:03:25.000 Ninja Turtles.
00:03:26.000 Because I was up late, and I'm on Netflix, and I'm watching Megan Fox, Ninja Turtles.
00:03:29.000 My wife's like, this is terrible.
00:03:30.000 I go, no, you don't know Ninja Turtles, because at one point it was actually a good film, and I take it back, and I watch it, and I'm like...
00:03:37.000 Let's try Ninja Turtles 2, and it just gets worse. 0.98
00:03:40.000 Well, you know, the shit that's good when you're little, and it's still good when you're little, but when you're not little, it's not good. 0.98
00:03:46.000 Like, I took my kids to see this, uh, there's a show called Wild Kratts. 0.99
00:03:50.000 Yeah, well, I worked with PBS. They'd come in every now and then.
00:03:52.000 Oh, yeah?
00:03:53.000 Okay.
00:03:53.000 And Arthur was my first gig.
00:03:55.000 It's a very good show.
00:03:55.000 The show is very good.
00:03:57.000 Like, the television show.
00:03:58.000 The live show is terrible.
00:03:59.000 Oh! 0.60
00:04:00.000 It's like a museum where you just see a video display kind of deal.
00:04:02.000 Isn't it like that?
00:04:03.000 No, it's worse than that.
00:04:04.000 It's way worse than that. 0.99
00:04:05.000 But meanwhile, my five-year-old fucking loved it. 0.99
00:04:09.000 Like, I took her to see it. 0.99
00:04:10.000 It was at the Pantages in Hollywood.
00:04:13.000 Okay.
00:04:13.000 And they put on these suits.
00:04:15.000 Like, in the show, there's this...
00:04:17.000 What the show's about, it's an educational show, for people who don't know, that is all about wildlife.
00:04:21.000 And kids learn a lot of stuff.
00:04:23.000 We used to be Zabumafu.
00:04:25.000 Zabumafu?
00:04:25.000 It was Zabumafu!
00:04:26.000 It was a jumping lemur.
00:04:27.000 With the Kratz brothers.
00:04:28.000 Yeah.
00:04:29.000 And nothing like an actual lemur.
00:04:32.000 No.
00:04:33.000 Very inaccurate.
00:04:34.000 Yes.
00:04:34.000 They can be aggressive.
00:04:36.000 Actual lemurs can be aggressive. 0.91
00:04:37.000 Yes, actual lemurs.
00:04:38.000 So you know some kid went to the zoo and was like, this is a bum-a-foo, and just got his face torn off by a monkey on red wine and Xanax. 0.97
00:04:44.000 But the show, like, my five-year-old learns all kinds of shit from it because, like, she'll say, you know, Daddy, did you know that alligators, or crocodiles, I think it is, they decide whether or not they're male or female based on the temperature of the water. 0.99
00:04:59.000 I'm like, fuck, is that true? 0.99
00:05:01.000 And so I Google it, I'm like, holy shit, my five-year-old just schooled me on crocodile, the gendered assignment. 0.99
00:05:07.000 I think if we're being honest with ourselves, your five-year-old would probably school you on the difference between an alligator and a crocodile, because I'm still murky on it. 0.96
00:05:13.000 I'm pretty clear on that one.
00:05:15.000 Every time I get, you know, I was like, oh, those crocodiles, it goes by the snouts.
00:05:18.000 One of them is rounder, right?
00:05:19.000 Yeah, alligators.
00:05:20.000 I know Steve Irwin has a lot of respect for the American alligator.
00:05:24.000 Steve Irwin did?
00:05:24.000 Yeah, he was a crocodile hunter, but I remember when he got around some gators, he was like, these guys are serious.
00:05:30.000 Well, actually, alligators are not nearly as aggressive as crocodiles.
00:05:33.000 Crocodiles are way more dangerous.
00:05:34.000 That's factually inaccurate.
00:05:36.000 It's the opposite.
00:05:37.000 American alligators are smaller than crocodiles, like Nile crocs. 1.00
00:05:43.000 These fucking douchebags. 1.00
00:05:45.000 Some people have released Nile crocodiles in Florida, so they found a few of them in the Everglades. 1.00
00:05:51.000 So they have a seek and destroy mission.
00:05:54.000 Like if you see Nile crocodile game wardens, everyone is supposed to kill it on sight.
00:05:59.000 That happened in Michigan with those...
00:06:02.000 Lampreys.
00:06:02.000 You ever seen those?
00:06:03.000 Yeah.
00:06:04.000 And actually, as a matter of fact, I think you've done her show, Dana Lash and her husband, they were coming up to my wedding up there.
00:06:08.000 Yeah.
00:06:09.000 And he was like, I'm not going up there.
00:06:10.000 They got lampreys in the lake.
00:06:11.000 I'm like, they have no sharks.
00:06:12.000 They have no stingrays.
00:06:13.000 You have lampreys.
00:06:14.000 It's scary.
00:06:15.000 It's got like a mouthful of teeth.
00:06:16.000 They're cool.
00:06:17.000 They're like aliens.
00:06:18.000 Yeah, but they're not pleasant to be in the water with.
00:06:21.000 But they've exterminated like, I think, 90-something percent of them.
00:06:23.000 But it's that 10-something percent that you still have to worry about up there in the Great Lakes.
00:06:27.000 Yeah, well, there's a bunch of invasive species from other countries that they've done that with.
00:06:31.000 Those Asian carp, that's one of them. 1.00
00:06:33.000 If you haven't seen that, folks, you gotta Google it because it's the craziest fucking thing. 0.99
00:06:38.000 There's YouTube videos. 0.97
00:06:39.000 For whatever reason, when you ride boats, they jump out of the water and they have knocked people dead.
00:06:46.000 Like, knocked people out cold.
00:06:47.000 They jump out of the water.
00:06:48.000 Have people actually died from Asian carp?
00:06:50.000 I bet people have died because I know people have been knocked out cold.
00:06:53.000 I know personally- Well, there's a lot of weight. 0.99
00:06:56.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, they're like 30 pounds and they're fucking jumping in the air and hitting you in the head. 0.98
00:06:59.000 Well, mako sharks will do that, you know. 0.99
00:07:00.000 Really?
00:07:01.000 Yeah, mako sharks can get, I mean, maybe you can bring it up, like, I want to say 60 miles an hour, something absurd, and they'll go right into boats.
00:07:07.000 Whoa.
00:07:07.000 Yeah, mako sharks.
00:07:08.000 So they just slam into boats, but they don't fly in the air?
00:07:10.000 No, no, no, they get on fishing boats, yeah, they'll actually, like, because they're just going so fast, and I think they're coming for the bait.
00:07:15.000 You can find videos if you bring them up. 0.75
00:07:17.000 Have you ever seen a video of the kayakers that get fucking swamped by the whale? 0.92
00:07:22.000 The whale breeches? 0.98
00:07:23.000 I've read Moby Dick.
00:07:24.000 No, this is a real one.
00:07:25.000 This is a real one?
00:07:25.000 This is a real one, yeah.
00:07:26.000 See if you can find that.
00:07:28.000 The whale swamps some kayakers. 1.00
00:07:30.000 Yeah, these fucking poor fools are out in a kayak, go, I love whales! 1.00
00:07:34.000 It's amazing to be in this environment! 1.00
00:07:36.000 When you're around nature, it just makes you feel so wonderful.
00:07:39.000 They care about us. 1.00
00:07:40.000 They look, this fucking whale just... 1.00
00:07:42.000 These poor fuckers just get scared. 1.00
00:07:47.000 Well, I was in Florida. 1.00
00:07:47.000 Oh, is it? 1.00
00:07:48.000 Where do I go?
00:07:49.000 This way, this way?
00:07:50.000 Anyone.
00:07:51.000 It doesn't matter.
00:07:51.000 Watch this.
00:07:52.000 Oh my gosh. 1.00
00:07:54.000 Kill them all. 1.00
00:07:55.000 Oh, you fucked up, son. 1.00
00:07:56.000 Kill them all. 1.00
00:07:58.000 That's one thing I talked about. 1.00
00:08:00.000 I remember, and I got someone really mad in stand-up a bit about sharks.
00:08:03.000 I was like, I- Watch this, watch this a close-up. 0.99
00:08:05.000 Oh, Jesus fucking Christ! 0.99
00:08:07.000 Oh, gosh. 1.00
00:08:08.000 I mean, that's gotta weigh, what, 10,000 pounds?
00:08:11.000 Well, were they dead, or did they just kind of move with it because it's water?
00:08:14.000 I mean, if that happened to the land, you're dead.
00:08:15.000 Yeah, I would assume they just move with it. 1.00
00:08:17.000 I mean, they probably got fucked. 0.98
00:08:19.000 The real scary thing is if you get knocked unconscious by the blow, and then you go, look at, that's the impact of it. 1.00
00:08:24.000 Oh my gosh. 1.00
00:08:25.000 Fucker! 1.00
00:08:26.000 Was it a hunchback? 1.00
00:08:27.000 What do we know?
00:08:28.000 I don't know.
00:08:28.000 Oh, it looks like they're okay.
00:08:30.000 Have you ever seen whales in real life?
00:08:32.000 Oh, there they are.
00:08:33.000 They're fine.
00:08:33.000 I've seen dolphins.
00:08:34.000 I don't think I've seen whales.
00:08:35.000 I've seen whales.
00:08:36.000 I went on...
00:08:36.000 One of the things...
00:08:38.000 My daughter had this school thing where you go over to Zuma, Zuma Beach, like somewhere around November, I think.
00:08:44.000 They start...
00:08:45.000 And it's...
00:08:46.000 You don't even believe what you're seeing.
00:08:48.000 Right.
00:08:48.000 You see them in the water, you're like...
00:08:49.000 That's a fucking, that's a real whale? 0.99
00:08:51.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:08:51.000 Like, you see them and you're like, oh my. 1.00
00:08:53.000 I guess it's like when you see them on TV, you go, yeah, they're big.
00:08:57.000 I get it.
00:08:58.000 But when you see them in real life and you get a perspective, you're like, oh my god.
00:09:02.000 They're just living out there.
00:09:04.000 Well, it's like Lena Dunham.
00:09:04.000 You see her in the pictures and you know it's bad.
00:09:07.000 And then you see her in context next to someone.
00:09:11.000 I see what you just did.
00:09:12.000 You see what I did there?
00:09:12.000 It's okay.
00:09:13.000 She blocked me quickly without me ever even tweeting her.
00:09:16.000 One thing I will say, we were in Florida.
00:09:17.000 She blocked you because of that video that you made?
00:09:19.000 Is that what it was?
00:09:19.000 No, she brought me along before that video.
00:09:21.000 Really?
00:09:21.000 I get blocked by people before I even talk to them.
00:09:24.000 I do too.
00:09:25.000 Sometimes I'm proud of it.
00:09:26.000 Well, a lot of them are comedians too.
00:09:28.000 Comedians block you? 1.00
00:09:29.000 Get the fuck out of here. 1.00
00:09:30.000 What comedians have blocked you? 0.99
00:09:31.000 Amy Schumer, Mark Maron.
00:09:33.000 I never tweeted them.
00:09:34.000 What?
00:09:35.000 Amy Schumer and I got in an argument on Fox News a long time ago.
00:09:38.000 About what?
00:09:39.000 About a column I wrote, and we got into it, and I was like, okay.
00:09:42.000 And it was actually pretty respectful, but it happens with a lot of comedians, a lot of comics.
00:09:46.000 Well, what was the column about?
00:09:47.000 The column was about how, as a Christian, how I wasn't having sex, and wrote about sort of the case for Christians who maybe aren't crazy, who wait until they're married.
00:09:55.000 And she's like, I feel like it's really judgmental and really harsh.
00:09:59.000 And I was like, okay, well, that's fine.
00:10:00.000 This is my case, and you don't have to do it.
00:10:03.000 She got really, really mad about it.
00:10:05.000 You know what's interesting is if you were like a tantric Buddhist.
00:10:08.000 That's exactly what I said.
00:10:10.000 Did you really say that?
00:10:11.000 Yeah, I talked about that, and right away off air, the first thing, and it's the same thing with Maren, who I like, is, well, you're not part of our club. 0.79
00:10:19.000 Are you a comedian?
00:10:20.000 He does that, though.
00:10:22.000 He did that with me.
00:10:23.000 He's got this weird thing.
00:10:25.000 Well, that was Schumer right before.
00:10:25.000 She goes, well, where do you perform stand-up?
00:10:27.000 Do you perform in the city?
00:10:28.000 At this point, I was living in New York.
00:10:29.000 I was like, no.
00:10:30.000 She goes, where do you perform?
00:10:31.000 Like, you're a Christian? 0.99
00:10:31.000 Like, churches? 0.99
00:10:33.000 And I said, no, actually, but that sounded like a great idea.
00:10:35.000 So then after that, I started calling up churches, like, do you do stand-up?
00:10:38.000 And there was one that responded, yes.
00:10:41.000 And then they complained, and I never did another church again.
00:10:45.000 Because I had a whole bit about not having sex, and the bit I wrote was that it's the final taboo.
00:10:49.000 Like, I can go up and be as profane as possible, right?
00:10:52.000 And I follow comedians, or I'll go up and it's filthy, and my act is very politically incorrect.
00:10:56.000 Like, I've been banned from places, but it's not dirty.
00:10:58.000 And I said, then I go up and talk about not having sex, and everyone gets so uncomfortable.
00:11:03.000 The church problem was that I talked about having a raging erection for four years where my family had to lift the furniture like a Great Dane's Tale. 0.59
00:11:09.000 So the church has had a problem with it.
00:11:11.000 So you did this for years?
00:11:12.000 You didn't have sex?
00:11:14.000 Yeah, for years.
00:11:15.000 Why'd you do that? 0.98
00:11:16.000 Because I didn't want to be a hypocrite. 0.96
00:11:17.000 In what way? 0.90
00:11:19.000 Well, as someone who is a Christian, I don't really talk about it a lot, but I was like, you know what, I don't want to be a target that easily as far as being a hypocrite. 0.78
00:11:27.000 And that's why I did it. 0.96
00:11:28.000 So sex, like, there's a lot of really... 0.71
00:11:31.000 We got right off the bat. 0.60
00:11:33.000 Yeah, because it's a wacky subject.
00:11:36.000 You know, like as a discipline, like there's some beautiful things about Christianity as a discipline, but the problem is as a practice, if you really pay attention to the scriptures themselves, it's so problematic. 0.92
00:11:48.000 There's so many contradictions, there's so much crazy shit in there. 0.98
00:11:52.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:11:52.000 Are you going on the Old Testament? 0.99
00:11:54.000 Well, if that's the case, you're talking about some really nutty shit. 0.99
00:11:57.000 If you're going on the New Testament, you're talking about some... 0.99
00:11:58.000 I don't want to get off in the weeds and this right off the bat.
00:12:00.000 But you know what I'm saying.
00:12:01.000 I understand.
00:12:02.000 The New Testament, you're talking about things that are created by Constantine.
00:12:05.000 Right.
00:12:05.000 A bunch of, you know, the canon was really manufactured.
00:12:08.000 He wasn't even a Christian. 0.80
00:12:09.000 Here's my issue.
00:12:10.000 He was on his deathbed.
00:12:10.000 I don't talk about it a lot.
00:12:12.000 I'll write about it, because it's a big part of what defines me.
00:12:14.000 Like, we had Harrison Greenbaum on, and, you know, Norm Macdonald, Harrison Greenbaum went up and he did this bit about, you know, someone read me a scripture from a book, you know, on the bus, and I said, well, if you get to quote your favorite book, I get to quote mine. 0.98
00:12:24.000 Harry Potter, bitch! 1.00
00:12:26.000 And he came on, and he was really- Who is he? 1.00
00:12:27.000 Harrison Greenbaum.
00:12:28.000 He was on The Last Comic Standing.
00:12:29.000 I didn't watch it.
00:12:30.000 Anyways, he was on the show.
00:12:32.000 He said he knew you.
00:12:33.000 I had him on, and he was really mad that I wrote gay comic gets sort of shafted by norm. 0.76
00:12:39.000 And he was like, well, you know, first off, you used gay pejoratively.
00:12:43.000 I said, yes.
00:12:45.000 He goes, well, okay, so you know what that means?
00:12:47.000 I said, sure.
00:12:48.000 You're a comedian, right?
00:12:49.000 Like, why is that a problem?
00:12:50.000 He goes, well, you know, first of all, you just didn't use it pejoratively, and you didn't even ask me.
00:12:53.000 I said, well, are you gay?
00:12:54.000 He goes, no.
00:12:56.000 And I said, okay, I'll take your word for it, but I don't believe you, but let's just continue with the interview. 0.61
00:13:02.000 And then afterwards, I was like, you know, the fact is, even if you're not gay, you make this Christian joke, but you don't touch Islam at all. 0.89
00:13:07.000 And I know you claim you're straight, but they would throw you off a roof for your lisp.
00:13:11.000 And the thing with Norm was he went out and he did this bit about the Bible, and you have Roseanne Barr...
00:13:16.000 On Last Comic Standing.
00:13:17.000 And my commentary was just that Norm said, I didn't think it was accurate.
00:13:22.000 I didn't think it was funny at all.
00:13:24.000 I didn't think it was risky.
00:13:25.000 I thought it was very safe.
00:13:26.000 And if you're going to insult an entire group of people who know about the faith, you should probably know what you're talking about.
00:13:32.000 That was it.
00:13:33.000 Right.
00:13:33.000 And he was so upset.
00:13:35.000 And he was like, he was going, well, the audience was actually booing Norm.
00:13:37.000 And I go, well, you're missing the point of the piece.
00:13:39.000 It's that everyone was upset at Norm saying that. 0.99
00:13:42.000 And Roseanne Barr is telling her, that's some risky shit! 0.99
00:13:44.000 When he made a Bible joke. 0.99
00:13:46.000 And Norm was just pointing out, it's really not that risky.
00:13:48.000 Well, what was the joke?
00:13:49.000 Do you remember?
00:13:49.000 It was the guy quoting scripture.
00:13:51.000 He said, well, I get to quote my favorite book, Harry Potter, bitch. 1.00
00:13:53.000 Yeah, that's not that risky. 0.99
00:13:54.000 He's not gay. 1.00
00:13:55.000 Well, he's gay as fuck. 1.00
00:13:57.000 If he sounds anything like your voice, what is his name? 1.00
00:14:00.000 Can I look at him?
00:14:01.000 Harrison Greenbaum.
00:14:02.000 Pull him up on the screen, Jamie.
00:14:04.000 You're going to bring up our interview with him.
00:14:05.000 I will tell you by looking.
00:14:07.000 I have that gift.
00:14:09.000 That's true gaydar.
00:14:09.000 I got that gift from Jesus.
00:14:11.000 Wait, did you look at him? 0.98
00:14:12.000 I can look at someone and find out if they're gay.
00:14:14.000 Well, that's not gaydar. 0.89
00:14:15.000 It's a gift.
00:14:17.000 It's a biblical gift.
00:14:18.000 Or a divine gift.
00:14:19.000 My friend David Pride says that's homo-vision. 1.00
00:14:22.000 Well, he should go on TV and say that.
00:14:25.000 Yeah, he'll do well.
00:14:27.000 Okay, that guy's not gay?
00:14:29.000 Well, you can't go buy a picture.
00:14:30.000 Yes, I can.
00:14:31.000 Just like that.
00:14:33.000 The sweater with the white shirt underneath the sweater.
00:14:35.000 That's not fair.
00:14:36.000 He's a nice guy.
00:14:36.000 To be fair, I was making the point.
00:14:39.000 I don't think there's anything wrong with being gay.
00:14:40.000 My point was he got mad and he didn't want me to take him out of context.
00:14:44.000 So I said, okay, we'll do a pre-tape.
00:14:46.000 We have to do two segments for Aaron.
00:14:47.000 We did like a three-hour thing on it.
00:14:49.000 Where was this interview being held?
00:14:52.000 It was my show.
00:14:53.000 Oh, your show.
00:14:53.000 Okay.
00:14:53.000 So he came on your show.
00:14:54.000 Yeah.
00:14:55.000 All right.
00:14:56.000 I'm going to slip in a request for you to go on.
00:14:58.000 You can obviously say no.
00:14:59.000 No, I'd do it.
00:15:00.000 Sure.
00:15:01.000 We know we go terrestrially.
00:15:02.000 Actually, we're going into syndication here with Alex Jones's same guys at Genesis.
00:15:07.000 Doesn't mean I agree with Alex and a whole bunch.
00:15:09.000 So we kind of have the show that's syndicated terrestrially, and then we do extended versions for the podcast.
00:15:14.000 So we're kind of bridging that gap.
00:15:16.000 Well, Alex is the exact opposite of you in the sense of Alex is not having sex for any reason whatsoever.
00:15:24.000 I'm married, though.
00:15:25.000 It's great. 1.00
00:15:25.000 He's a fucking animal. 1.00
00:15:26.000 He's a crazy dude. 1.00
00:15:28.000 People go, why are you friends with Alex Jones? 0.90
00:15:30.000 I go, I'm friends with Alex Jones because I'm friends with Alex Jones.
00:15:33.000 What you're getting is Alex Jones on Infowars.com.
00:15:36.000 What they're doing right now is trying to take away life!
00:15:40.000 They want to wipe out America!
00:15:43.000 Do you do impressions in your act or do you find it hard to bring them in?
00:15:46.000 I very rarely do.
00:15:48.000 It feels hacked to bring them in and stand up usually, doesn't it?
00:15:50.000 Well, unless there's a reason to do it.
00:15:52.000 If I have to do a Mike Tyson bit, if there's something that happens to Mike Tyson and I've got a bit, well you saw it from like 1991, there's something that's online, but if there's a reason to do a voice, I'll do it.
00:16:05.000 Like if I had a Bill Cosby bit, I would do Bill Cosby's voice.
00:16:09.000 We do what we do on the podcast.
00:16:10.000 So we do fake commercials.
00:16:11.000 We do like dating advice with Bill Cosby, News Minute in the nick of time with Nick Nolte.
00:16:16.000 So it's like, the internet is actually, it's funny, we're talking about this.
00:16:19.000 When I started stand-up, I started acting actually when I was 12. And then I did stand-up because the unions killed the industry in Montreal.
00:16:26.000 There was just no more film coming into the city.
00:16:28.000 You know, they used to shoot a ton of stuff in Montreal, now not so much.
00:16:30.000 And so I was in my teens, and I had been writing stand-up for years for, like, school talent shows.
00:16:34.000 Like, I think this would be funny, because I grew up around it.
00:16:36.000 And I thought it was so freeing to do it.
00:16:39.000 And then it's kind of turned, like you were talking about this PC culture, where I think, and I was sort of wrong, in a sense, I was like, these kids online, they're not comedians, they don't know what it's like.
00:16:47.000 But I think about it, you know, that's what the Marx Brothers would have said as stand-up.
00:16:50.000 It's just an evolution of comedy.
00:16:52.000 And you can't do stand-up in your bedroom, but you can do YouTube in your bedroom.
00:16:56.000 And so you look at Nicole Arbor, this thing.
00:16:58.000 I don't know if you saw.
00:16:59.000 She did the fat shaming thing. 1.00
00:17:00.000 Yes, I did see that.
00:17:01.000 And I didn't think it was particularly funny, but I defended her right to say it.
00:17:03.000 But I was saying it doesn't matter if she's funny or not, because people will always attack you for not being funny.
00:17:09.000 They're not going to say that's offensive, you can't say it.
00:17:11.000 They'll say, well, you're just not funny, so you shouldn't be able to say that.
00:17:14.000 And the PC culture has really permeated stand-up in a way that's...
00:17:18.000 I mean, it happened in Canada years ago.
00:17:21.000 Freedom of speech doesn't really exist in Canada.
00:17:23.000 It's not a legally protected right. 0.97
00:17:24.000 Well, you know about the guy in Vancouver who literally got sued and lost because he had some woman heckling him and he said a bunch of mean shit to her.
00:17:33.000 And so he, whatever human rights violation, I forget what the actual citation was, but he has to pay her like $15,000. 0.85
00:17:42.000 Well, there's a pastor, Stephen Boisson, who said he wouldn't marry two guys and spoke out against it and wasn't hateful.
00:17:48.000 You know, everyone loves to paint the pastors, the Southern... 1.00
00:17:50.000 They're damn homos! 1.00
00:17:51.000 And he was just like, well, listen, that's not going to happen to my church. 1.00
00:17:53.000 And he was actually banned from public speaking, lost his church, had to file an appeal.
00:17:58.000 And so that's where, when I talk with people about it... 0.50
00:18:00.000 Banned from public speaking by saying that he doesn't want to marry two gay guys.
00:18:05.000 And saying it's still against God's...
00:18:06.000 You know, whatever his deal is.
00:18:07.000 Whether you agree with it or not, that's my point.
00:18:10.000 It's still not okay to ban a guy from even having a church.
00:18:14.000 I mean, Westboro Baptists have 12 people, nine of whom are the guy's family.
00:18:18.000 They get so much press time.
00:18:19.000 Meanwhile, we have over 300 million Muslims who want you to die for converting, and we're talking about the Westboro Baptists because they use the F word. 0.97
00:18:27.000 Well, it's fun. 0.95
00:18:29.000 It is fun.
00:18:30.000 That's one of the reasons why the Westboro Baptist Church... 1.00
00:18:32.000 I mean, that guy, Phelps, was so fucking nuts. 1.00
00:18:35.000 He was so out of his... 0.99
00:18:36.000 Did you ever see the Louis Theroux documentary?
00:18:38.000 Yeah, I did.
00:18:39.000 Were they asking if he's Jewish? 1.00
00:18:40.000 Holy shit! 1.00
00:18:41.000 He's like, well, I don't think it should matter. 1.00
00:18:43.000 But are you Jew?
00:18:44.000 I'm not saying I am Jewish, but I don't understand why that should... 1.00
00:18:47.000 That's not relevant.
00:18:49.000 Are you Jew?
00:18:50.000 That was all they...
00:18:50.000 It was like the guy on YouTube.
00:18:52.000 And they were doing Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu!
00:18:54.000 Do you remember that?
00:18:55.000 I don't remember that.
00:18:56.000 Yeah, the white supremacists...
00:18:58.000 Why do I not remember that?
00:18:59.000 They were training in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and I was like, do you not see the irony?
00:19:03.000 They were training MMA, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
00:19:07.000 Wait, no, wait, no, I'm thinking of a different one with Theroux on white supremacy.
00:19:11.000 Oh, okay.
00:19:12.000 He did a white supremacist one.
00:19:13.000 I didn't see that one.
00:19:14.000 And they were, like, training up their gang, and they were doing Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
00:19:17.000 Well, that's pretty ironic. 1.00
00:19:20.000 Brazilians are not white, you fuck. 1.00
00:19:21.000 Well, they kind of are. 1.00
00:19:22.000 Some of them are. 0.99
00:19:23.000 Well, they're the most racist people on the planet. 0.99
00:19:24.000 Brazilians? 1.00
00:19:25.000 Oh, my God.
00:19:25.000 Well, I wouldn't say they're racist.
00:19:27.000 What I would say is that they're nationalistic.
00:19:29.000 They're very nationalistic. 0.86
00:19:30.000 But they're not in the sense because half the country is black.
00:19:35.000 Half the country is African.
00:19:39.000 Well, I don't know if you really sort of...
00:19:40.000 Not to get into your wheelhouse, but like the Vitor Belfour Anderson Silva thing.
00:19:44.000 If you look at a lot of the stuff like on the Brazilian message boards that people were saying, it was really like this sort of coming up of this black class in Brazil, where if you were black, you worked at McDonald's, you just weren't considered a first-class citizen among a lot of the pure Brazilians.
00:19:58.000 People don't even understand about Che Guevara.
00:20:01.000 In Cuba, same kind of thing.
00:20:03.000 You know, I saw a kid wearing a Che Guevara shirt.
00:20:05.000 I go, well, why don't you just wear a Hitler shirt? 0.92
00:20:06.000 Well, what do you mean?
00:20:07.000 He believed in pure European Spanish blood and executed people for not being that.
00:20:14.000 And in Brazil, there really is a class structure.
00:20:16.000 I mean, my Brazilian instructor, I won't say who I've had several, was...
00:20:20.000 Quite racist.
00:20:21.000 Here in America, you can play for the fight. 1.00
00:20:24.000 The guy is white, black. 0.99
00:20:26.000 In Brazil, he's not even give time of day. 0.98
00:20:29.000 That's weird because Jacare is like a Brazilian national hero and he's black.
00:20:33.000 Yeah, but they're outliers.
00:20:34.000 What about Pele, the soccer player?
00:20:36.000 He was a Brazilian national hero.
00:20:37.000 He's black. 0.78
00:20:37.000 My evidence is anecdotal, Joe. 0.78
00:20:39.000 No, it is true.
00:20:41.000 I've been to Brazil many times.
00:20:43.000 I just don't see that.
00:20:45.000 I mean, I might be wrong.
00:20:46.000 You know, there was a huge issue with Anderson Silva when he fought Damien Maia.
00:20:50.000 Yeah.
00:20:51.000 He was a sort of bourgeoisie class.
00:20:53.000 Damien Maia had college.
00:20:55.000 He was a reporter.
00:20:56.000 He called him Playboy.
00:20:56.000 Yeah.
00:20:57.000 You know, and Playboy is like one of the ways that they, that's the pejorative they use for rich, privileged white people. 0.80
00:21:03.000 Right.
00:21:03.000 You know, Playboy.
00:21:04.000 That's a Brazilian saying, check your privilege!
00:21:08.000 Check your privilege, my friend.
00:21:10.000 My friend.
00:21:10.000 I check for you.
00:21:12.000 I don't know.
00:21:13.000 I would have to...
00:21:13.000 I never actually asked my Brazilian friends whether or not Brazil's racist, but I didn't experience it that much when I was there.
00:21:20.000 They seem real friendly.
00:21:21.000 It's a very, very friendly country, other than the robberies and stuff.
00:21:26.000 You do have to understand, like, you know, success has changed how people treat you.
00:21:31.000 You're very successful.
00:21:32.000 You're a victim of your own success in the sense that...
00:21:34.000 In a sense.
00:21:35.000 I came in here nervous.
00:21:36.000 Well, they also know that I'm a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu black belt, so I practice Brazilian arts, you know, so I have a big deep respect for Brazil.
00:21:44.000 Right.
00:21:45.000 And then a big deep respect for, of course, the Gracie family. 0.99
00:21:48.000 I mean, I'm wearing a fucking Gracie t-shirt. 0.99
00:21:50.000 Yeah, I know. 0.99
00:21:50.000 The Gracie family. 0.99
00:21:51.000 You look good in it. 0.91
00:21:52.000 Not gay! 1.00
00:21:53.000 Thank you.
00:21:54.000 Thank you. 0.69
00:21:54.000 Not gay! 0.69
00:21:55.000 Not gay either. 1.00
00:21:56.000 Harry Potter, bitch! 1.00
00:21:58.000 It is weird, though, that there's not a straight voice, you know? 1.00
00:22:02.000 But there's a gay voice.
00:22:03.000 Well, yeah, and what's so funny, it's like you say that my wife had a friend.
00:22:07.000 I won't talk about it.
00:22:08.000 Talk about it.
00:22:09.000 You don't have to name names. 0.99
00:22:10.000 Who is clearly gay. 0.98
00:22:12.000 Oh, I gotta go like that. 0.97
00:22:13.000 Like, clearly gay, to the point where when he was gone, I would call him Gay Blank, because I know it's such a common name. 0.89
00:22:19.000 My wife is just free. 1.00
00:22:20.000 I'm gonna get a text right now.
00:22:21.000 Uh-oh.
00:22:22.000 So she'd be like, I was out with so-and-so.
00:22:23.000 And I'm like, gay so-and-so?
00:22:24.000 Because I know five of them.
00:22:25.000 You know, it's just like, it's like a name like John.
00:22:27.000 It's not John.
00:22:27.000 Okay.
00:22:28.000 And she'd be like, he's not gay. 0.79
00:22:31.000 Okay.
00:22:31.000 First off, let me clarify the rules.
00:22:33.000 If he's not gay, you can't go out with him alone until one in the morning. 1.00
00:22:38.000 Okay, he's gay. 0.99
00:22:42.000 And then sure enough, he came out of the closet. 0.98
00:22:45.000 Shocker.
00:22:45.000 Well, here's the thing.
00:22:47.000 When a guy like that, and I mean literally, he's the kind of gay guy who literally, like Richard Simmons would be like, that's kind of severe, like really gay. 0.74
00:22:54.000 And when he came out of the closet, I told my wife, I said, okay, here's what's going on.
00:22:59.000 What he's really saying is stuff's about to get weird.
00:23:02.000 You're going to find some Grindr profiles, like, because everyone knew he was gay.
00:23:05.000 Right.
00:23:06.000 And then all of a sudden it's just a revolving door, you know, of boyfriends, and it's like, it's more uncomfortable for my wife.
00:23:11.000 It's more comfortable for me, because I had to keep this lie alive, like, hey, you go on any dates with females lately, Gabe?
00:23:19.000 Like, now, you know, and he dated a girl for a while.
00:23:23.000 And I remember just sitting there like, what bunny hole did I jump into where I'm sitting at dinner with my wife and gay blank with this girl and they're clearly just faking it. 0.99
00:23:32.000 And I was like, I just rather- Was the girl faking it or did she think that maybe he was straight?
00:23:36.000 That's the million dollar question.
00:23:37.000 I have a friend, my friend Shayma Tosh, she's a stand-up comedian.
00:23:40.000 She's married not one, but two different guys that turned out to be gay.
00:23:45.000 Like, she married him- At a certain point it's you.
00:23:47.000 I don't know if it's her. 1.00
00:23:49.000 I mean, I don't know what the fuck it is. 0.99
00:23:51.000 She seems so normal, though. 0.99
00:23:52.000 I mean, she's a comic. 1.00
00:23:53.000 She's kind of crazy, but she's nice.
00:23:56.000 She seems totally normal. 0.73
00:23:58.000 I've not met a bunch of stable female comedians. 1.00
00:24:00.000 I know a few.
00:24:01.000 Well, it's weird, because it's like, in my world, you know, like, in my world.
00:24:07.000 In the world of stand-up.
00:24:08.000 In my world, Sonny.
00:24:09.000 My patriarchal world.
00:24:10.000 The sun sets on the west and rises in the east.
00:24:14.000 It's...
00:24:15.000 Actually, it does that, right?
00:24:16.000 Yeah, I reversed it.
00:24:17.000 That was accurate.
00:24:18.000 Yeah, it was accurate.
00:24:19.000 My world's boring, frankly.
00:24:23.000 But the world of stand-up comics, it's like it's a fraternity, you know?
00:24:27.000 So, like, I'm friends with girls who are open micers. 0.99
00:24:30.000 I'm friends with, like, especially from Kill Tony, which is one of my friend Red Band and Tony Hinchcliffe's shows, where we constantly are around these open-miker kids that are coming up, and, you know, we become friends with them, and a lot of them are out of their fucking mind. 0.95
00:24:44.000 They're crazy, but they're friends, you know? 0.60
00:24:46.000 In my world, that's just the mindset that it takes to be a comedian. 1.00
00:24:51.000 You have to be a little bit fucking crazy. 0.99
00:24:53.000 Yeah, I think that's true. 1.00
00:24:54.000 I just think so. 1.00
00:24:55.000 So, Shayma is no different than any of my other friends, in that sense, but somehow or another, she wound up with two fucking gay guys. 0.99
00:25:02.000 And the last time I talked to her... 0.99
00:25:03.000 I don't think that story goes somehow or another.
00:25:05.000 I think there's a reason in there.
00:25:07.000 I think in her mind it's somehow or another.
00:25:09.000 Okay. 1.00
00:25:09.000 She's like, what the fuck? 1.00
00:25:11.000 But, you know, she's dated straight guys. 1.00
00:25:13.000 She dated one of my buddies.
00:25:14.000 I mean, you know, it's not that. 0.99
00:25:16.000 I don't know what the fuck it is. 0.97
00:25:17.000 But she dated one guy... 1.00
00:25:20.000 And then she found out somehow or another he was gay. 1.00
00:25:22.000 And then she dated another guy that was like a male stripper, I think, and somehow or another he was doing some gay shit. 1.00
00:25:27.000 Well, there you go. 1.00
00:25:27.000 It's kind of like the talent pool with college sports. 1.00
00:25:30.000 You're picking the guy with the highest vertical. 0.76
00:25:32.000 She's drawn from the pool of the male strippers and the guys who are, you know, pay for gay bodybuilders. 1.00
00:25:37.000 That's what's going to happen. 0.99
00:25:38.000 Pay for gay body... 1.00
00:25:39.000 Gay for pay. 1.00
00:25:40.000 Did I say pay for... 0.99
00:25:41.000 Well, it depends on who's doing the paying. 0.98
00:25:43.000 Joe Weider with Arnold, he's the one who's paying for the gay. 1.00
00:25:46.000 Is that true? 0.92
00:25:47.000 I have no idea.
00:25:48.000 I don't want to be slandered.
00:25:49.000 Is that what you heard?
00:25:51.000 You heard Joe Weider paid Arnold?
00:25:52.000 I didn't hear that. 1.00
00:25:53.000 I heard that Arnold did some gay shit back in the day. 1.00
00:25:58.000 I could be completely off base. 1.00
00:25:59.000 Well, I've talked about it on the podcast.
00:26:01.000 I had a buddy who was a male stripper.
00:26:04.000 Two buddies way back in the day.
00:26:06.000 And he would wear these underwear that was like an elephant underwear.
00:26:13.000 And he put his hog in the trunk.
00:26:15.000 I love how you combine hog with elephant underwear.
00:26:18.000 There's one animal and another.
00:26:20.000 It's actually like a delicacy, really. 0.99
00:26:21.000 The guy was really fucking weird. 0.57
00:26:23.000 But then one day, he was talking about all these girls that he's dancing for, and I go, you ever have to dance for guys? 1.00
00:26:29.000 And there's this fucking dead silence in the room, and everybody's like, oh shit, he said it. 0.99
00:26:35.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:26:36.000 He asked the question and then shit got weird when he started explaining how he had to sometimes, but he hated it. 0.98
00:26:41.000 When I moved to LA, there was work and it was cleaning. 0.98
00:26:46.000 When I moved to LA, Tony Camacho was my manager and I was living out of a car for a bit.
00:26:53.000 And when I say it, it's kind of like the Ronda house.
00:26:54.000 It was like a week and I was just sort of couch surfing until I got to my next place.
00:26:57.000 So it's not like I was a longtime hobo and actually got a 24-hour fitness pass for like a week.
00:27:03.000 So I was fine.
00:27:06.000 I don't even know how I was getting started.
00:27:07.000 Something about...
00:27:07.000 Oh, when I first came to LA, yeah, there was a role in Craigslist, and it was like cleaning houses in your underwear.
00:27:13.000 It was like no contact, but you're just cleaning houses in your underwear.
00:27:16.000 It was like $150 an hour or something like that.
00:27:19.000 No, no, wait.
00:27:20.000 It was $50 an hour for a minimum of three-hour pay because it assumed, you know...
00:27:24.000 I lost something under the couch.
00:27:26.000 Yes.
00:27:26.000 Well, my dad had that.
00:27:27.000 He mowed lawns, and the guy at an Indian village in Detroit, and he would...
00:27:32.000 My dad can maybe text me the name of this guy, and he said the guy was like, but he wasn't flamboyantly gay.
00:27:36.000 He was very polite.
00:27:37.000 Like, well, you know, Darren, you're a good-looking young man, you and your brother Dean.
00:27:40.000 You should, as you mow lawn, you know, feel free.
00:27:43.000 It's hot here in the summer, too.
00:27:44.000 Take off your shirts and wear something a little bit shorter.
00:27:47.000 You know, if you want to take a dip in the pool, go ahead.
00:27:50.000 Oh, boy.
00:27:51.000 But he was very, very nice.
00:27:52.000 He had a light, long-term partner.
00:27:54.000 And, you know, I think a lot of them got massacred in Detroit.
00:27:57.000 I don't think they live in that area anymore.
00:27:59.000 Really?
00:27:59.000 Got massacred?
00:28:00.000 Well, I just mean Detroit.
00:28:01.000 It's a war zone.
00:28:02.000 Sounds like they're Indians. 1.00
00:28:04.000 Some sort of fucking Native American war. 1.00
00:28:06.000 Indigenous, Joe. 1.00
00:28:07.000 They came over and stole their land.
00:28:09.000 Get your stuff together, indigenous. 1.00
00:28:10.000 You can't say Indian anymore?
00:28:11.000 Is that a...
00:28:11.000 No, no, you not only can't say Indian, we moved on to Native American, and now we've moved on to indigenous.
00:28:16.000 Well, in Canada, it's indigenous, right? 1.00
00:28:18.000 First Nation, is that what they say?
00:28:20.000 I don't know what they say.
00:28:21.000 I think they say First Nation.
00:28:22.000 I left Canada.
00:28:22.000 Well, it used to be, well, everybody called people Eskimo, and then...
00:28:27.000 No, you can't do that.
00:28:28.000 You can't, but in Alaska, they use the word Eskimo.
00:28:32.000 Like, it's okay.
00:28:32.000 Alaska, it's okay.
00:28:33.000 It's weird.
00:28:34.000 This is the problem with the lexicon and the changing rules. 0.99
00:28:36.000 Well, it's when people get ultra-super-fucking-sensitive and shit gets weird. 0.95
00:28:40.000 Like, there's things you used to say for the longest time, and now you can't say them anymore. 0.98
00:28:44.000 Yeah.
00:28:44.000 Well, and that's where, you know, you're more in the middle.
00:28:47.000 I'm, you know, people would say to the right of Attila the Hun, like, libertarian conservative.
00:28:53.000 And that's by design.
00:28:55.000 That's not an accident.
00:28:56.000 People want to control language.
00:28:58.000 If you look at the history of political correctness, it is designed as a political tool.
00:29:01.000 And I see these people awakening now, like the social justice warrior left.
00:29:05.000 Well, all they're doing is doing the same thing to, maybe they're not doing it to you, but to people like Milo, to people out there who are liberal, the same thing they've done to me and every conservative for a long time. 0.96
00:29:14.000 Just, you're a racist. 1.00
00:29:15.000 You're a sexist. 1.00
00:29:16.000 Perfect example is Ben Carson. 0.99
00:29:17.000 You may not like him.
00:29:19.000 People may not like him, right?
00:29:20.000 But Ben Carson was a neurosurgeon.
00:29:22.000 Not just a neurosurgeon.
00:29:23.000 The best. 1.00
00:29:23.000 He was a fucking wizard. 1.00
00:29:25.000 And he's probably the most polite candidate we've had in 40 years. 1.00
00:29:29.000 I don't think anyone would dispute that.
00:29:30.000 He's a very polite guy.
00:29:32.000 What do they do? 1.00
00:29:32.000 They paint him as a dumbass bigot. 1.00
00:29:35.000 Well, he believes some crazy shit. 1.00
00:29:37.000 Some crazy stuff. 1.00
00:29:38.000 Yeah.
00:29:38.000 But I would hope that people afford him, you know, for example, like my dad is Christian conservative, right?
00:29:44.000 But he sends your stuff along.
00:29:46.000 Now, he could easily be like, oh, you know, he'll just tell them, like, skip through the edible mushroom stuff and the tattoos, because he doesn't agree with it.
00:29:51.000 But, like, Joe is really right on this, the part about dying to ego every day in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
00:29:55.000 And he'll send it along to people.
00:29:56.000 This is really inspirational. 0.97
00:29:58.000 In my family, we've never had to paint someone as an idiot because of some opinions with which we don't agree. 0.99
00:30:03.000 You may think Ben Carson believes some crazy stuff. 0.92
00:30:06.000 But he's a smart guy, and he's not a bigot.
00:30:09.000 Well, what I find fascinating about him is the people that do compartmentalize certain aspects of life, like that he does ignore science when it comes to evolution.
00:30:18.000 And he believes in macroevolution, but he doesn't believe in microevolution, I believe.
00:30:22.000 The other way around.
00:30:23.000 Micro, but not macro.
00:30:25.000 He's got some interesting ideas about what he believes and what he doesn't believe in that the world of science accepts as a stated fact.
00:30:36.000 Yeah, but I know a lot of people say, oh, he's this 6,000-year-old Young Earth creationist, you know, and he said, no, I'm not.
00:30:42.000 He just said he has flaws in the Big Bang, and he believes in a Big Bang, just a different version of it.
00:30:46.000 Well, the Big Bang.
00:30:47.000 But I don't think some guy in a Reddit thread in his mother's basement with a bag of Cheetos has figured something out that Ben Carson hasn't.
00:30:53.000 You asked me about, like, the Christian thing.
00:30:54.000 Well, you just diminished a person from Reddit.
00:30:58.000 You just put them in their basement.
00:31:00.000 Maybe they have a nice apartment.
00:31:01.000 Well, you get some of those.
00:31:02.000 You get a weird intersection here.
00:31:03.000 You get smart people who listen to your show, but you do get some closed-minded people.
00:31:10.000 My thing is, you know what?
00:31:11.000 The reason I don't talk about faith or like Donald Trump...
00:31:14.000 It's because there are certain things where people are just not going to hear it.
00:31:17.000 Here's my position on religion and atheism, and I don't think it's an untenable position.
00:31:21.000 And it's pretty simple.
00:31:22.000 I believe there are very smart atheists, and I believe that there are some very smart Christians.
00:31:26.000 That's undeniable.
00:31:27.000 It's undeniable.
00:31:27.000 Yeah, but the thing is now, the reason atheists are so fun to tease and get them up in a lather is because they think that all of these brilliant people and three billion people on the face of the earth have missed something that they caught because they saw half of a Christopher Hitchens debate.
00:31:41.000 And if you sit down with Ben Carson, these kids calling him an idiot and talking about how he doesn't know science, they would sit down and he'd probably school them. 0.92
00:31:47.000 They may not agree with him, but he'd probably school them. 0.99
00:31:50.000 And my problem is taking things out of context.
00:31:52.000 He's not even my guy.
00:31:53.000 Well, you see, the problem is you're talking about Ben Carson versus some kids that don't know what they're talking about.
00:31:59.000 Bernie Sanders or Hillary or O'Malley?
00:32:02.000 But what they're comparing Ben Carson to is people that do know what they're talking about.
00:32:06.000 So if you do get people that have a vast understanding of evolution, and they sit down and debate Ben Carson, he's not going to do very well.
00:32:13.000 I don't know.
00:32:14.000 I've not seen it.
00:32:15.000 I would think probably not, but I don't think he would put himself in that position.
00:32:18.000 The Big Bang is the weird one, because the Big Bang, essentially, no one understands why it happened.
00:32:24.000 No one understands what caused it.
00:32:26.000 No one understands if it's just some cycle that goes on every 14 billion years.
00:32:30.000 He's writing a book on it.
00:32:31.000 Who is?
00:32:31.000 Ben Carson?
00:32:32.000 On the Big Bang?
00:32:33.000 On explaining his reasoning.
00:32:35.000 Oh, that's interesting.
00:32:36.000 Well, what is his reasoning?
00:32:37.000 Do you know what his position is?
00:32:38.000 I don't know exactly what his position is.
00:32:40.000 It doesn't reflect my position.
00:32:42.000 But I don't think that that disqualifies him from being a better leader than a lot of people on the docket.
00:32:47.000 I mean, did you watch the debates last night?
00:32:49.000 No, I did not.
00:32:50.000 There was literally a point.
00:32:52.000 We're all the biggest argument.
00:32:54.000 And that's the thing that I have.
00:32:55.000 If you look at the right, I mean, you're moderate.
00:32:57.000 You would be considered to any leftist if you said the stuff they say.
00:33:00.000 They'd be like, oh, you're right wing.
00:33:01.000 That's what they would say.
00:33:02.000 Not you.
00:33:02.000 That's what they would say.
00:33:03.000 Let's compare really quickly.
00:33:06.000 Right now, the GOP, right?
00:33:07.000 People are like, it's a party of old white guys. 0.95
00:33:08.000 Okay, you've got Carly Fiorina, you've got two Latinos, and Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio, you've got a brain surgeon who's a black guy. 0.86
00:33:14.000 Ted Cruz is barely a Latino. 0.97
00:33:15.000 How dare you? 1.00
00:33:16.000 He's gay, by the way. 0.99
00:33:17.000 For sure. 0.80
00:33:18.000 100%.
00:33:19.000 He also is probably one of the smartest students to come out of Harvard, according to his professors, with an IQ that's, like, higher than MENSA. Because he blew them all, so they say that. 0.91
00:33:26.000 Yeah!
00:33:27.000 That must be it.
00:33:28.000 That's what happened.
00:33:28.000 That and chemtrails.
00:33:30.000 I think, so you have them, Ben Carson.
00:33:33.000 You have people who are career politicians.
00:33:34.000 You have people with no experience in the political sector.
00:33:36.000 And then I'm watching last night, Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders, O'Malley, and a couple of other scrubs.
00:33:43.000 Every single one is an old white politician.
00:33:45.000 And the worst part is the lack of intellectual diversity.
00:33:48.000 Look at the GOP debate.
00:33:49.000 You have Rand Paul, who's a non-interventionist, basically, who's all about that cannabis oil.
00:33:53.000 You have Chris Christie, who basically wants to prosecute using drugs.
00:33:56.000 You have Carly Fiorina, who believes it's a state's right. 0.99
00:33:58.000 You have some people who supported the war in Iraq.
00:34:00.000 You have some people who were against it.
00:34:01.000 Every single question last night at that Democratic debate was answered in unison.
00:34:06.000 And the biggest argument was over who had the lowest rating from the NRA. They were attacking Bernie Sanders, going, keep in mind, you only have a D-minus from the NRA. I got an F! Is that really what they were arguing about?
00:34:17.000 Who said that?
00:34:18.000 It was O'Malley, Sanders, and Clinton.
00:34:20.000 All of them were arguing over who got the lowest rating of the NRA. That was their badge of honor.
00:34:24.000 You only got a D-minus.
00:34:25.000 I got an F. I was like, what is this?
00:34:28.000 That's interesting because I did see an interview.
00:34:31.000 I wanted to get to the debate later today.
00:34:33.000 I didn't watch it yesterday.
00:34:34.000 I had some stuff I had to do that was actually important.
00:34:38.000 But Bernie Sanders was talking...
00:34:41.000 Just joking around.
00:34:43.000 Look, there's a real problem with the Commission for Presidential Debates.
00:34:46.000 A real problem with the fact that when it gets down to the big crunch time, the Commission for Presidential Debates is a privately funded institution.
00:34:54.000 It's not as simple as like everyone who's running for president gets an equal say and we have all these qualified candidates and we're just going to figure out who's the right guy for the job.
00:35:03.000 It takes a shitload of money to get to the point where you can actually run for a debate.
00:35:08.000 When you actually can get up there And actually have your opinion and broadcast it to the world. 0.99
00:35:13.000 There's a lot of fucking hoops you have to jump through. 0.99
00:35:15.000 Probably rightly so. 0.99
00:35:17.000 There's some value in that, yeah.
00:35:18.000 But I think that as time moves on and the medium of the internet becomes more and more powerful, most likely that will be less of a factor.
00:35:26.000 Having Anderson Cooper with his goofy glasses asking questions about whether or not it's okay to be a conscientious objector and still run for president.
00:35:33.000 Which is one of the things that apparently he asked Bernie Sanders, which I thought was fascinating.
00:35:38.000 Do black lives matter? 1.00
00:35:40.000 Or do all lives matter?
00:35:41.000 That one was like, okay.
00:35:43.000 Black lives matter!
00:35:44.000 Well, that's what Bernie said. 1.00
00:35:45.000 Well, fucking, of course all lives matter. 1.00
00:35:48.000 That's a loaded question, and it's a stupid question to answer. 1.00
00:35:51.000 They should say, that's a loaded question, and I'm not going to answer it. 0.99
00:35:54.000 Of course all lives matter, I understand the movement, and I think A, B, and C about it.
00:35:58.000 Yes, I agree with you. 0.98
00:35:59.000 That's the right way to say it, but he said black lives matter because that's the progressive left-wing thing to say because you're not gonna get shit from white people about it, but you'll get a lot of brownie points from black people. 0.99
00:36:10.000 You might get crap from Sean King who's a white guy about it. 0.99
00:36:13.000 Sean King is a white guy, isn't he? 0.99
00:36:14.000 Well, I was kicked out of that Feminist Film Festival for saying he was white. 0.99
00:36:16.000 They have rubber-titted, tranny, menstruating Jesus Christ. 1.00
00:36:20.000 I saw that. 0.98
00:36:21.000 And I've got, like, it doesn't bother.
00:36:23.000 I find it funny.
00:36:24.000 But they're triggered by me saying Sean King is white.
00:36:26.000 That was one of my favorite videos of yours.
00:36:28.000 That and Alina Dunham video.
00:36:30.000 But that video particularly of you with the feminists.
00:36:32.000 Because first of all, you're being very reasonable.
00:36:34.000 And they got upset right away.
00:36:37.000 They were getting upset.
00:36:38.000 You weren't being aggressive.
00:36:40.000 You weren't being rude.
00:36:41.000 You were asking really pretty reasonable questions.
00:36:45.000 And they're like, you have to leave.
00:36:46.000 Full disclosure, I was being a disturber.
00:36:48.000 I don't deny that.
00:36:50.000 A little bit.
00:36:50.000 You selectively edited it.
00:36:51.000 Anything you've ever watched is edited.
00:36:53.000 Well, what are you gonna do? 0.98
00:36:54.000 Put all fucking three hours of whatever the fuck you were there online? 0.98
00:36:57.000 Well, that's what, like, James O'Keefe or Andrew Breitbart of the Planned Parenthood videos do because they're journalists. 0.99
00:37:02.000 What I do is entertainment.
00:37:03.000 But they'll actually put up the full footage. 0.99
00:37:04.000 See, I don't know what the fuck those Planned Parenthood... 1.00
00:37:06.000 I didn't... 0.99
00:37:07.000 I watched part of it and I was like, is this real?
00:37:10.000 Like, what's going on with this?
00:37:11.000 Yeah.
00:37:11.000 Are these people really talking like this about fetus parts?
00:37:13.000 Yeah, you can watch the full footage.
00:37:14.000 You can watch three, four hours.
00:37:16.000 And the big thing, the attack, you know, and Carly Fiorina for talking about it, they go, well, it didn't really happen in a video.
00:37:20.000 Listen, she has 30 seconds. 0.96
00:37:22.000 She's talking about pieces in the video that you can see, and she sets it in a narrative that she can answer in 30 seconds.
00:37:27.000 And they go, well, all those things didn't happen in that timeline in a video.
00:37:30.000 Well, educate me, because were they or were they not saying that we can get you intact fetuses, and then we can...
00:37:38.000 They were selling fetus parts.
00:37:39.000 Yeah, so they were, right?
00:37:40.000 Yes.
00:37:40.000 So why is everybody saying that it's a hoax?
00:37:42.000 Well, why did they say the same thing, you know, with Andrew Breitbart, the acorn scandal?
00:37:46.000 Well, let's not get into that.
00:37:48.000 Well, no, it's important.
00:37:48.000 They attack the messenger.
00:37:50.000 That's what they do. 0.97
00:37:51.000 The acorn scandal was pretty fucking clear. 0.99
00:37:53.000 They were literally giving people advice on how to sell prostitution. 0.98
00:37:58.000 Yeah, but the left said the exact same thing.
00:37:59.000 The exact same thing.
00:38:00.000 They said it's dishonest, these are selectively edited, and their final argument was, when James O'Keefe appeared, and I'm not a journalist, so I just make a clue, like, that's why I don't release, it's designed to be funny, it's more in line with The Daily Show than something at Fox News or CNN. James O'Keefe went on Fox and Friends in a pimp jacket,
00:38:18.000 like, promoting the videos.
00:38:20.000 And their argument was, he didn't go in dressed like a pimp in her dress. 0.96
00:38:23.000 They said they were pimps and prostitutes, but they didn't dress like that. 0.97
00:38:27.000 Well, how do you tell me how a pimp or a prostitute dresses? 1.00
00:38:29.000 Because I bet you're wrong. 0.72
00:38:30.000 I'm in the Black Lives Matter.
00:38:31.000 People get mad at me.
00:38:32.000 Listen, man.
00:38:33.000 I think they dress like Ben Carson with his pinstrap smoking jacket.
00:38:35.000 I was in Vegas once, and I was with a couple of my buddies, and we were at this bar, and it was a UFC night. 0.97
00:38:41.000 It was the night of the weigh-ins, so we went to the weigh-ins, and we were at the bar, and there was this girl who looked like a fucking executive at a Fortune 500 company. 1.00
00:38:50.000 I mean, she had a respectable business dress on, she had nice clothes on, a nice purse, and she was talking to me and all my friends, and I was like, something is fucking going on here. 0.96
00:39:00.000 Uh-oh. 0.70
00:39:00.000 And then, I don't know what it was, but my friends were hitting on her and all this, and she was just a little too receptive. 0.70
00:39:07.000 And I said, so I, it was just, my friends were ugly.
00:39:12.000 You have low confidence in your friends. 1.00
00:39:14.000 Well, they're savages. 1.00
00:39:15.000 You know, I mean, maybe she just wants to get guerrilla fucked by a bunch of savages. 1.00
00:39:21.000 But I was like, something's going on here. 0.98
00:39:23.000 So I go, how much is all this going to cost everybody?
00:39:27.000 And she goes, well, it depends how many guys.
00:39:29.000 And they all went, who?
00:39:31.000 And I go, yeah.
00:39:32.000 And then they went, how'd you know?
00:39:34.000 And I go, well, I'm guessing some insincerity here.
00:39:38.000 She's working.
00:39:38.000 You're working, right?
00:39:39.000 And she goes, yeah, I'm working.
00:39:40.000 And I go, okay. 1.00
00:39:42.000 And then they were like, damn. 0.99
00:39:44.000 I go, you thought she liked you? 0.99
00:39:46.000 And then everybody starts laughing.
00:39:47.000 I go, well, if you look at her, she looks like she could be an executive for like a Mandalay Bay. 1.00
00:39:53.000 Like she could be there like, is everybody enjoying their stay here at Mandalay Bay?
00:39:57.000 Anybody want their cocksucked for a thousand dollars? 1.00
00:39:59.000 You learned to pick up on that growing up in Montreal like I did. 0.74
00:40:02.000 Oh, really?
00:40:03.000 Well, I mean, it's everywhere.
00:40:04.000 Well, how do they dress?
00:40:06.000 Well, I mean, usually when someone approaches you...
00:40:07.000 Can you tell how they dress?
00:40:07.000 No, I can't tell how they dress.
00:40:08.000 I'm not talking about pimps or prostitutes.
00:40:10.000 I'm saying the guy went out in a giant feathered purple coat and a fedora on the show and a cane as a gag, right?
00:40:16.000 That's like pimps up, hose down.
00:40:17.000 Right.
00:40:18.000 And so the left goes, well, he didn't do that in the Acorn video, so this is misleading.
00:40:22.000 Okay, so what is the argument against the Planned Parenthood video?
00:40:27.000 What are they saying?
00:40:28.000 They're doing something that's illegal.
00:40:30.000 In recording?
00:40:31.000 Which is selling baby parts.
00:40:32.000 Right, right.
00:40:33.000 But what is the argument against the video, I'm saying?
00:40:36.000 That they selectively edited it.
00:40:38.000 So they said they selectively edited it, and then it didn't appear in the video.
00:40:42.000 And then when the full video footage was released, the arguments that I saw was, well, no one's going to watch 12 hours of footage 12 hours is not that much if you want to get to the truth of something that's really important.
00:40:53.000 Right.
00:40:53.000 Yeah, but that's the whole point.
00:40:54.000 So if you selectively edit it, they say you edited it.
00:40:56.000 If you put up the full footage, you're like, well, you're hiding behind the fact that you know no one's going to watch that.
00:41:00.000 Okay, but if someone does watch the full 12 hours, does it appear like it did in the edited video?
00:41:05.000 Because I watched the edited video.
00:41:07.000 And I thought, like, whoa, this is kind of crazy.
00:41:09.000 They're talking about it like...
00:41:10.000 How did she describe it as, like, line items?
00:41:12.000 Yes. 1.00
00:41:12.000 And I was like, fuck, man. 1.00
00:41:14.000 That seems, like, really inhuman. 0.99
00:41:15.000 You're talking about fetus parts and that they can adjust their process in order to get more intact video. 0.93
00:41:22.000 And then the other really fucking disturbing thing about the video was when they reach into the pile of baby parts and they're pulling out arms... 0.80
00:41:31.000 And they're literally pulling you see little baby arms. 0.97
00:41:34.000 And I'm pro-choice. 0.98
00:41:35.000 I think you should be able to do whatever the fuck you want up to a point. 0.98
00:41:38.000 And I think it's one of those things in life that there is a gray area. 0.98
00:41:43.000 And I think I'm pro-choice if it's a bunch of cells.
00:41:46.000 I'm pro-choice if it's a cluster of cells the size of a walnut. 0.99
00:41:51.000 But I think once it becomes a fucking human being, you're looking at a little tiny human being that's inside someone's body. 0.99
00:41:58.000 I don't know what the call is. 0.99
00:42:00.000 Well, the legislation is they want to have abortions up to 22 weeks.
00:42:05.000 What is it, 22 weeks?
00:42:06.000 4, 8, oh, Jesus.
00:42:07.000 Yeah, that's Wendy Davis and all of a sudden.
00:42:09.000 That's what they're pushing for.
00:42:10.000 And they want it to be, you know, and they want it to be taxpayer funded.
00:42:13.000 That's the deal that people have a problem with.
00:42:15.000 You know, you have some people who are pro-life on principle, and then you have some people who say, I still should never have to pay for an abortion, and you should never be able to force an employer to pay for an abortion.
00:42:24.000 42 weeks?
00:42:25.000 22. 22 weeks?
00:42:26.000 Jesus Christ.
00:42:28.000 That's kind of scary.
00:42:29.000 That's what they want legally.
00:42:31.000 Three months is weird because it's not viable outside of the womb.
00:42:35.000 But when you look at it, it looks like a fetus.
00:42:37.000 But that's the thing that the left has a real issue with because they don't want...
00:42:42.000 There's no open discussion.
00:42:45.000 There's no objectivity.
00:42:47.000 There's no...
00:42:47.000 When it comes to this, like you are either...
00:42:49.000 Hands off my vagina. 1.00
00:42:50.000 Exactly. 1.00
00:42:51.000 It's either like you are pro-choice or you are some fucking barbarian who's pro-life and you want to fuck with people's bodies and you want to stand outside of abortion clinics with signs and show aborted fetuses. 1.00
00:43:03.000 But I'm not saying that. 1.00
00:43:04.000 I am pro-choice.
00:43:06.000 I'm not the person to tell you what you can or can't do with your body.
00:43:09.000 But what we're looking at is a baby.
00:43:12.000 Well, yeah, what it is is it comes down to the irony of the left saying the right is anti-science.
00:43:16.000 And you have well-known atheists, even like Christopher Hitchens.
00:43:19.000 Dawkins isn't pro-life, but he kind of slipped up where they admitted that it was ending a life.
00:43:23.000 Christopher Hitchens is like, I think, absolutely, undoubtedly, it's a life.
00:43:26.000 And he walked people through it.
00:43:27.000 And then, of course, he became hated by the left and a bigot and a racist.
00:43:31.000 So people who claim that the right are anti-science when it comes to abortion, they want abortions past a point where there's no doubt that scientifically that is much more than a cluster of cells.
00:43:42.000 It's not going to be solved in this discussion.
00:43:43.000 I got into it with this comedian online from England because Dawkins had said something that a fetus or an embryo has just as much in common with a human being as a pig embryo or something like that.
00:44:01.000 Or is no different than a pig embryo?
00:44:03.000 I forget how he worded it.
00:44:04.000 But I was like, well, that's just disingenuous.
00:44:06.000 Because, obviously, a human embryo is going to become a human if you don't snuff it out. 1.00
00:44:11.000 A pig embryo is a fucking pig. 1.00
00:44:13.000 This goes back to the same thing in political correctness and stand-up. 1.00
00:44:17.000 Or cultural Marxism.
00:44:18.000 It's the same thing.
00:44:19.000 It's not, hey, you can have a reasonable position.
00:44:21.000 You can argue being pro-life.
00:44:23.000 And I can say, okay, I see where you're coming from.
00:44:25.000 It's, you out of control our uterus! 1.00
00:44:27.000 Well, what I was going to say is that this guy started saying I was right-wing.
00:44:30.000 He was like saying, you're right wing, and I'm not, and I'm pro-choice.
00:44:35.000 I'm saying, like right now, that is going to be a baby. 0.95
00:44:37.000 You can't say that's the same as a pig, because it's not. 0.82
00:44:41.000 And he was like, that was the other argument.
00:44:43.000 He was like, it's no different than a seed.
00:44:45.000 I go, it's not a seed.
00:44:46.000 I go, because a seed needs to be germinated.
00:44:48.000 A seed, you need to put it in the ground, it needs to be watered, and then it sprouts and then becomes a plant.
00:44:53.000 This is something that's already growing.
00:44:56.000 A seed is the egg.
00:44:57.000 That's the egg inside of a woman's body. 1.00
00:44:59.000 No one's saying you can't take eggs out of your body.
00:45:01.000 I'm not even saying you can't have abortions, but let's be honest about what it is.
00:45:05.000 It is a fetus.
00:45:07.000 Or an embryo, or whatever you want to call it.
00:45:09.000 There's a certain amount of weeks where it becomes scientifically considered a fetus, but I'm not a right-wing guy in a sense.
00:45:19.000 But I don't like the distinctions, man.
00:45:21.000 I don't like being left-wing.
00:45:22.000 But the left sees you as that way.
00:45:22.000 That's the problem.
00:45:23.000 I don't think so.
00:45:24.000 I think more people see me as being a liberal hippie than see me because I smoke pot and I have tattoos and I encourage people to do psychedelic drugs.
00:45:34.000 And I'm pro-gay rights.
00:45:36.000 I'm pro-gay marriage.
00:45:38.000 I'm pro-choice.
00:45:39.000 I'm pro a lot of things that are left wing.
00:45:42.000 Put it this way.
00:45:42.000 There are a lot of people in the Republican Party who are that way.
00:45:46.000 Certainly the libertarian wing.
00:45:47.000 Certainly people who would pull the lever for that.
00:45:48.000 Mm-hmm.
00:45:49.000 There is no one on the Democratic platform, no one, who would even allow you that inch that you just expressed.
00:45:55.000 No one running for president.
00:45:56.000 They wouldn't even give you that time of day.
00:45:57.000 It's abortion, on demand, for free, at any point.
00:46:00.000 That's their mantra, and they can't stray from it.
00:46:03.000 And that's just, you know, that's always where I try and speak with people. 0.98
00:46:05.000 Oh, right-wing douchebag! 0.95
00:46:07.000 Oh gosh, I just got echoed. 0.97
00:46:08.000 I don't know if the word douchebag was a trigger for the microphone.
00:46:10.000 Did it echo?
00:46:11.000 I didn't hear it.
00:46:12.000 It was your own head.
00:46:13.000 You got voices in your own head. 0.98
00:46:15.000 Right-wing douchebag is just such a trigger. 0.98
00:46:17.000 You got triggered! 0.98
00:46:18.000 You triggered yourself.
00:46:20.000 It's one of those things, you know, I've been called a racist my whole, anytime you've come out of the closet.
00:46:24.000 I've been banned from college. 0.98
00:46:25.000 Well, you are white. 0.98
00:46:26.000 No, I've said some, and I've made racist jokes. 0.96
00:46:28.000 I ended my set, the reason Tony Camacho signed me was I ended my set on the N-word, ER, stuck the landing, goodnight everyone, walked off.
00:46:36.000 And he was going, okay, I want to hear more.
00:46:41.000 Okay, in all fairness, Tony Camacho, not the best judge of stand-up.
00:46:45.000 I know.
00:46:46.000 Well, I don't want to say he's a great guy.
00:46:48.000 Well, I slept on his couch and stuff for a while.
00:46:49.000 Very nice guy.
00:46:50.000 Yeah, but my point is, you know, if you pull that out now, if you pull that out now, I mean, if I didn't have my own independent thing going, you end someone's career.
00:46:58.000 Have you ever said the N-word?
00:46:59.000 Like Paula Deen, the deposition was, have you ever said the N-word?
00:47:03.000 Anyone who would sing along to a Run-DMC album would have to answer yes.
00:47:07.000 They didn't ask the context.
00:47:09.000 And that's where we are.
00:47:10.000 I don't think Run-DMC used...
00:47:12.000 They didn't?
00:47:12.000 I think you're thinking like NWA. Maybe.
00:47:15.000 I mean, it's in their name.
00:47:16.000 I know Kanye does. 0.97
00:47:18.000 He's a douchebag, but he's a brilliant MC. Yeah, okay. 0.99
00:47:23.000 He got a couple good songs.
00:47:24.000 He does.
00:47:25.000 Yeah.
00:47:26.000 Alright, sorry, what were we gonna say?
00:47:26.000 You were gonna say something about Tony, do I know what?
00:47:28.000 No, no, I'll tell you that later.
00:47:30.000 Tell you that off the air.
00:47:31.000 He's a nice guy.
00:47:31.000 I like Tony.
00:47:32.000 Yeah.
00:47:32.000 He's always been a nice guy.
00:47:33.000 He's always been a nice guy.
00:47:34.000 My point is, I'm 17 and he brought me in.
00:47:36.000 I would have said, I want to hear more.
00:47:38.000 I want to hear more.
00:47:39.000 I'm not exactly sure if that's the best way to end your set, son.
00:47:42.000 No, the reason was, the bit was, and I've talked about it, and I'll even do it here, talk about it, open about it, was it was a bit about French-Canadians watching rap videos.
00:47:49.000 So you have these French-Canadians who are trying to mimic urban accents from the United States, and to the point where you would have them use words they had seen in rap videos, they didn't even grasp the meaning. 0.94
00:47:58.000 And so I did.
00:47:58.000 It was a whole bilingual set of using French words and merging it with English, and white kids using the N-word and walking off.
00:48:05.000 And it was kind of a shock, but really funny, because everyone had heard it, and that's how I ended it.
00:48:08.000 That's like on the Just for Laughs, too.
00:48:09.000 Speaking of the N-word, did you hear that Trevor Noah's a joke thief?
00:48:13.000 The guy's a joke thief, like straight up.
00:48:15.000 The South African...
00:48:16.000 The guy who's the new host of The Daily Show did a show recently.
00:48:20.000 I forget what it was for, but it wasn't a broadcast show.
00:48:23.000 And he did an old Dave Chappelle bit.
00:48:26.000 For a Dave Chappelle bit, I want to say from like the early 2000s...
00:48:31.000 Like, one of his early specials. 0.98
00:48:33.000 And, I mean, moved it around a little bit, but it's the same fucking joke. 0.99
00:48:38.000 I mean, verbatim. 0.99
00:48:39.000 Thank God you didn't get on stage with them at the Comedy Store.
00:48:43.000 Get on stage with him at the Comedy Store?
00:48:45.000 Oh, Trevor Noah?
00:48:45.000 Why?
00:48:46.000 Oh, the Mencia thing?
00:48:49.000 Well, you know, actually funny, I watched that.
00:48:50.000 And you know who I called?
00:48:51.000 I don't know if you're still with her.
00:48:52.000 It was with Tony Camacho, and I had a meeting with Stacey Mark.
00:48:55.000 Yeah.
00:48:55.000 Because you mentioned her, and I was like, oh, that must be the person.
00:48:58.000 Stacey's my agent.
00:48:58.000 She's still my agent.
00:48:59.000 She became my agent five minutes after that happened.
00:49:01.000 Yeah.
00:49:02.000 Because my agent at the time was the same agent as Muncie and they wanted me to apologize to him.
00:49:06.000 Yeah, I remember.
00:49:07.000 And I'm like, we're done.
00:49:08.000 I just had a list of going down.
00:49:10.000 That's what's weird.
00:49:10.000 I was nervous coming in here because, you know, when I was at Fox News, I was here for four and a half years and I went on air, you know, for the first time.
00:49:17.000 I had never seen any of these people.
00:49:19.000 I'd never had cable.
00:49:20.000 We didn't get Fox News in Montreal, so I kind of went in and wasn't starstruck.
00:49:24.000 I've been watching you since I was like 10. I mean, Dave Foley is a national hero.
00:49:27.000 He's a national treasure.
00:49:28.000 News radio, UFC, I've been following for a long time.
00:49:32.000 So you have to make sure that you're still yourself in the face of someone who you know. 0.89
00:49:35.000 The one time I got really starstruck was Clint Eastwood, and there's a certain level of fame with which I'm no longer comfortable, and I just made an ass out of myself.
00:49:41.000 Yeah, that's a level, like, we go... 1.00
00:49:44.000 If I ever met Clint Eastwood, I'd probably be a babbling fucking idiot, too. 1.00
00:49:48.000 I was. 1.00
00:49:49.000 Outlaw Josie Wales, dude. 1.00
00:49:50.000 It's tough to get past that.
00:49:51.000 Well, that's, what do you say to him?
00:49:52.000 Like, I love doing Every Which Way But Loose?
00:49:53.000 What do you pick?
00:49:53.000 That's a good one.
00:49:54.000 That was a good one.
00:49:55.000 I don't know how they trained that reggaeton. 1.00
00:49:56.000 Just say, you're the shit dog, and give him some knuckles. 1.00
00:49:58.000 Well, he said to me, he turns around, and he kind of saw I was looking at him, and I don't, you never want to be that guy to bother him, and you... 1.00
00:50:05.000 I'm Clint.
00:50:06.000 Put out his hand.
00:50:07.000 He doesn't have to say that, but he does.
00:50:10.000 I guess a lot of those really, really famous guys, they kind of have to do that because they don't want to assume that you know who they are, even though they do know that you know who they are.
00:50:21.000 So it's kind of like a common courtesy thing to ask your name instead of saying, what's your name?
00:50:25.000 Nice to meet you, buddy. 0.99
00:50:26.000 You know who I am, bitch. 1.00
00:50:28.000 Steve Crowder? 1.00
00:50:29.000 Nice to meet you.
00:50:30.000 You want to hear a funny Clint Eastwood story?
00:50:32.000 Yes.
00:50:32.000 Okay, so this is true.
00:50:33.000 Does it have to do with the Obama sit-down thing?
00:50:35.000 No, no, no, it doesn't.
00:50:36.000 Well, because it was at this kind of thing with conservatives in the entertainment industry, so it's very small and closed circuit, and everyone, it's small enough that people introduce themselves, like, hey, you know, I'm a comedian, you know, writer, blah, blah, blah, Fox News.
00:50:48.000 Hey, I'm so-and-so director.
00:50:50.000 And Clint Eastwood, everyone knows he's there, stands up and he goes, hi, I'm Clint, former mayor of Carmel.
00:50:59.000 That's true.
00:51:00.000 It's not untrue.
00:51:02.000 And if you want to be a mayor of a place, that's a spot. 0.98
00:51:05.000 That's a fucking beautiful place. 0.98
00:51:07.000 God, have you ever been to Carmel? 0.99
00:51:08.000 The closest I've been is like to Santa Barbara, and I've been through it on the way up.
00:51:12.000 You gotta keep going.
00:51:14.000 Carmel is on the way up to, uh, it's right next to Big Sur.
00:51:17.000 It's like maybe a half hour from Big Sur. 0.99
00:51:20.000 Fuck, it's beautiful up there. 0.99
00:51:21.000 That might be one of the most beautiful spots in this country. 1.00
00:51:24.000 Have you ever been to northern Michigan?
00:51:26.000 Yeah, I've been to northern Michigan.
00:51:27.000 Like north of Traverse City?
00:51:29.000 I've been to Olivet.
00:51:30.000 You know where Olivet is?
00:51:32.000 Yeah, no.
00:51:32.000 I mean, it's been actually rated most beautiful area in the country for a few years running.
00:51:36.000 Yeah, Leelanau County.
00:51:38.000 So it looks like the Mediterranean, you know, vineyards rolling down to water that's crystal clear.
00:51:43.000 No sharks, a little bit of lampreys.
00:51:45.000 And it's just gorgeous up there.
00:51:47.000 Yeah, there's some, well, there's some beautiful spots in this country, obviously, but what I was saying is that Carmel is just, it's a really unusual area.
00:51:54.000 There's not a lot of people there.
00:51:56.000 It's like the land, like there's the water, and then it doesn't go in that deep, you know, deep into the mainland.
00:52:04.000 It's just fucking stunning, stunning countryside and beautiful views of the ocean.
00:52:08.000 Well, that's where they did Play Misty for me. 0.98
00:52:10.000 Oh yeah, that's right.
00:52:11.000 Clint Eastwood beats the hell out of that broad. 1.00
00:52:13.000 He's probably been going up there for a long time.
00:52:16.000 He just beats the hell out of her.
00:52:18.000 You can't do that anymore.
00:52:19.000 You can't, but I remember watching it for the first time, like, oh, this is pretty good, and he just comes in, the hell are you, and just starts wailing on her.
00:52:25.000 I'm like, oh my god! 0.57
00:52:26.000 In the Dirty Harry films, you're just punching some prostitute with an afro, and you're like, you can't, like, blowing him away with his.44 Magnum? 0.98
00:52:33.000 You can't do any of that stuff anymore. 0.85
00:52:35.000 No, you can't.
00:52:35.000 You couldn't make Blazing Saddles.
00:52:36.000 It's super hard to punch women on movies. 1.00
00:52:38.000 Yeah, like, that woman would have to be, like, a demon or something like that. 1.00
00:52:41.000 And even then.
00:52:42.000 Even then, I don't know.
00:52:42.000 People don't want to see it.
00:52:43.000 Even then, they'd say it's a representation of the patriarchal society.
00:52:46.000 That's right.
00:52:47.000 Like Mad Max.
00:52:48.000 Did you see the remake?
00:52:49.000 Didn't see it.
00:52:50.000 It wasn't bad.
00:52:51.000 It was bizarre. 0.98
00:52:52.000 But it was like, all these people were saying it's this pro-feminist message because Charlize Theron kicks ass. 0.98
00:52:58.000 And then the feminists said, actually, it's not because the real leader is a guy and it's patriarchy and all these Tumblr blogs. 1.00
00:53:06.000 But it's a gay guy. 0.98
00:53:09.000 Who? 0.85
00:53:09.000 What's his face? 0.85
00:53:10.000 Tom, uh, what the fuck? 0.99
00:53:11.000 Tom Hardy? 0.99
00:53:12.000 Tom Hardy?
00:53:12.000 No, it's not Tom Hardy.
00:53:13.000 It's like an old gray-haired guy who's like a leader.
00:53:15.000 I don't think Tom Hardy's gay.
00:53:16.000 He shut down a reporter who asked him about his...
00:53:18.000 He said, oh, you're asking me about sexuality.
00:53:20.000 And he was like, just go away.
00:53:21.000 Said it's not interesting. 0.99
00:53:23.000 Yeah, that's what you say when you're gay. 0.99
00:53:24.000 Yeah, I know.
00:53:25.000 My rule is if a woman claims she's bisexual, like a teenager, she's trying to be cool. 1.00
00:53:30.000 If a guy says it, he's gay. 0.82
00:53:32.000 Oh, really? 0.93
00:53:32.000 Yeah, right. 0.93
00:53:33.000 I've never met a bi guy who wasn't gay.
00:53:35.000 Yeah, me neither.
00:53:37.000 Yeah, I would say there's two types of dudes.
00:53:41.000 There's gay dudes, and then there's really gullible straight dudes who get talked into blowing crafty gay dudes. 0.83
00:53:47.000 Like Bowie McJagher?
00:53:48.000 We don't really want to do this, but also...
00:53:50.000 Who's Bowie McJagher?
00:53:50.000 David Bowie McJagher.
00:53:52.000 Oh, Bowie...
00:53:53.000 I thought it was like one person.
00:53:54.000 Who's Bowie McJagher?
00:53:56.000 Yeah, it's like that stand-up group, what is it, Oates and Garfunkel?
00:54:00.000 Just merging names.
00:54:01.000 That's funny.
00:54:02.000 Although that night they got it on, two became one.
00:54:04.000 I might have made that up about Tom Hardy.
00:54:06.000 No, I think he talked about experimenting at one point. 0.88
00:54:09.000 Oh, then he's gay. 0.98
00:54:10.000 That's it. 0.97
00:54:11.000 What are you, a scientist? 1.00
00:54:12.000 Are you sucking the dick with a lab coat on, a beaker in your hand? 1.00
00:54:14.000 What are you doing? 1.00
00:54:16.000 For some reason I'm picturing Beaker from the Muppets game.
00:54:21.000 But back in the 70s and the 60s, I think more people did experiment that might not even be gay because they were breaking down so many bizarre boundaries and there was so much restriction on behavior from the McCarthy era and the 1950s and the way people behaved. 0.98
00:54:38.000 It was all of a sudden everyone's doing acid and they're free love and I think there was a lot of dick sucking there that people went, you know, shouldn't have done that. 0.99
00:54:46.000 Like, they legitimately weren't gay, but did some gay shit. 1.00
00:54:50.000 That's, I mean, what do I know? 1.00
00:54:51.000 Not a historian.
00:54:52.000 We're getting off the realm of something that we can prove.
00:54:55.000 It's like LeVar Burton.
00:54:56.000 You don't have to take my word for it.
00:54:58.000 Is LeVar Burton gay?
00:54:59.000 No, but I mean, you ever watch that in Reading Rainbow? 0.99
00:55:01.000 Do you think when he puts those things on, it's just dicks glued inside there?
00:55:05.000 It's like the kaleidoscope that Marv and Harry were looking in. 0.99
00:55:10.000 Butts and dicks. 1.00
00:55:12.000 The big kaleidoscope. 0.97
00:55:14.000 No, I remember reading Rainbow?
00:55:15.000 And you'd always be like, you know, this book, you'd talk about it in his little polo and his Burger King Kids Club haircut, and you'd be like, but you don't have to take my word for it.
00:55:22.000 And it's like, okay, so we're not taking your word for it.
00:55:24.000 We should take the word of a bunch of six-year-olds.
00:55:26.000 And it's like, I love this book because...
00:55:30.000 How little respect do you have for your own opinion, LeVar?
00:55:33.000 Well, I think you're just being humble, right?
00:55:35.000 Maybe.
00:55:36.000 Which is generally not a quality found in the gay community.
00:55:38.000 No?
00:55:39.000 I don't know.
00:55:40.000 They're dramatic.
00:55:40.000 They have a flair for the dramatic.
00:55:41.000 They do have a flair for the dramatic.
00:55:43.000 That's one of the cool qualities about them.
00:55:45.000 Oh, it's hilarious. 0.97
00:55:46.000 You ever see a gay guy in a disaster, like a fire drill? 1.00
00:55:49.000 It's funny. 0.99
00:55:50.000 I've never seen a gay guy in a disaster. 1.00
00:55:52.000 I have a guy, actually, I was talking with my brother about it, a famous actor my brother works with, and he has, like, you know, an earthquake kit, and he's like, do you have that in your trunk anymore, like an emergency kit?
00:56:02.000 Because he had that when he was here for the big earthquakes, and he was in some area where it was, like, really gay, and he just said it was so funny, they were just running around in the streets, and oh my god!
00:56:10.000 And he's, like, super liberal, you know, further to the left than either of us, intolerant, and he was just like, it was just really a trip to see.
00:56:18.000 Well...
00:56:18.000 Milo?
00:56:19.000 You think he's gonna be your rock when that goes down?
00:56:22.000 No, no, no, no.
00:56:23.000 He'll fall apart.
00:56:25.000 I don't know if he'll fall apart, but he's running into the arms of another.
00:56:29.000 Yeah, there's gonna be some issues there, for sure.
00:56:31.000 But, you know, that's just not his wheelhouse. 0.95
00:56:34.000 His wheelhouse isn't fucking toughening up, you know? 0.96
00:56:37.000 I don't know. 0.99
00:56:38.000 And fucking riding it out, riding the storm out. 0.99
00:56:41.000 That's a negative stereotype. 0.99
00:56:43.000 I'm a little offended.
00:56:44.000 It is a negative stereotype, but the femininity of the gay male.
00:56:48.000 It's very funny, and it's okay to, like, I talked, well, that was, I was saying, at CPAC, it was like this political action conference, that's where Huffington Post said I yelled the N-word, and I didn't. 0.66
00:56:57.000 And they said I joked about raping Ashley Judd, and I didn't.
00:56:59.000 Wait, what was that?
00:57:00.000 Why'd they say that?
00:57:02.000 Who said that?
00:57:02.000 Well, they fact-checked stand-up.
00:57:03.000 This was Huffington Post.
00:57:04.000 And that's why when we were talking online...
00:57:05.000 So you were doing stand-up?
00:57:06.000 Yeah.
00:57:07.000 I was emceeing a political action conference.
00:57:09.000 Right.
00:57:09.000 I was just doing some bits.
00:57:10.000 And one of them was in a private room.
00:57:13.000 It was like a blogging awards ceremony.
00:57:15.000 And we had a rap video.
00:57:16.000 Mr. America, we were dressed up as Thomas Jefferson and George Washington.
00:57:20.000 And one of the jokes in the video...
00:57:22.000 You know, it's not something you'd put on your resume, but it was bringing back Knickers.
00:57:25.000 It's a rap song.
00:57:26.000 And then the record stops, and I'm like, no, no, I can say Knickers because I wear Knickers.
00:57:30.000 And we actually had a black producer who was like, oh, okay. 0.83
00:57:31.000 You know, gives us a thumbs up.
00:57:32.000 We're like, hood pass for Knickers.
00:57:34.000 So I'm fine if Huffington Post want to say, okay, they made a joke that's risque, and, you know, but they just said Stephen Crowder yells N-word.
00:57:40.000 To applause.
00:57:41.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.
00:57:43.000 Or Ashley makes rape joke about Ashley Judd. 1.00
00:57:45.000 Do you imagine...
00:57:46.000 I'm sorry to interrupt.
00:57:47.000 Go ahead.
00:57:48.000 No, no, go ahead.
00:57:48.000 But that's why when you sent me them as a source, I'm going, you're sending...
00:57:50.000 You know, today's salon is tomorrow's HuffPo. 1.00
00:57:53.000 They are not the friend of stand-up comics.
00:57:55.000 No.
00:57:55.000 They want to destroy the voice of anyone who doesn't agree with them.
00:57:58.000 And that's a lot of stand-up comedians now.
00:57:59.000 And that's what's problematic.
00:58:01.000 Well, what I've said about these people and I'll continue to say it, I don't believe they're actually progressives.
00:58:07.000 What I think they're doing is they're mining the world of ideas and they're looking for things that they can attack.
00:58:13.000 I don't think they really want to attack it because it makes sense.
00:58:15.000 I think they're mining the world of ideas for the moral high ground and they're looking to find things that they can be aggressive about and go after and it gives them a license to be really shitty to people.
00:58:28.000 Yeah, you treat someone, you know, you paint them as subhuman, you can treat them as subhuman. 1.00
00:58:32.000 I think also, it's really important, if you really want to be a progressive person, you really want love and acceptance in the world, it's really important to not be a fucking asshole. 0.99
00:58:41.000 And there's a lot of these people, like, here's something. 0.99
00:58:44.000 I'm a hunter, okay? 0.99
00:58:46.000 And when I hunt, I sometimes put pictures of these fucking animals online. 0.99
00:58:50.000 And one of the reasons why I do it, I do it for a bunch of reasons. 0.99
00:58:53.000 One, to see the reaction.
00:58:55.000 Two, the last one I did, I did as a tribute to my friend Cameron Haynes, because I shot an elk with a bow and arrow, and he taught me how to do it.
00:59:02.000 It's hard to do. 1.00
00:59:03.000 The fucking nastiest people, the meanest shit, was vegans. 1.00
00:59:07.000 Oh, I read the Sherdog thread. 1.00
00:59:08.000 They were saying something.
00:59:09.000 I didn't read that.
00:59:10.000 But there were vegans on Sherdog.
00:59:12.000 Why do you read Sherdog?
00:59:14.000 I actually, that's how, you want to know how far back it goes.
00:59:16.000 I had an account before the message boards, I think, even existed because I was watching the highlight videos because I couldn't afford the pay-per-view.
00:59:22.000 So when I hear Beautiful Day from U2, I still think of Sakuraba light-kicking Henzo Gracie in his back. 0.85
00:59:27.000 Oh, beautiful.
00:59:28.000 Like, trigger. 0.93
00:59:28.000 But yeah, you were all over, sure, dog, they hate you. 0.93
00:59:30.000 That's fine. 0.96
00:59:32.000 They're animals. 1.00
00:59:33.000 Meanwhile, how many of those fucking dummies eat meat? 1.00
00:59:35.000 How many of those dummies have cats? 1.00
00:59:37.000 That's my favorite one. 0.86
00:59:38.000 People who have cats.
00:59:39.000 You buy cat food for your cat, guess what? 1.00
00:59:41.000 You're a fucking killer. 1.00
00:59:42.000 Because they're not getting that shit from a cat food tree, okay? 1.00
00:59:45.000 They're grinding up animals that live a horrible life, they're living in cages, and they're sucking them out of those cages, killing them in a ruthless, cost-effective manner, and stuffing them into a can so your little fucking tabby can eat. 1.00
00:59:56.000 Plus you still have to have a cat. 0.99
00:59:57.000 Yeah.
00:59:58.000 I like cats.
00:59:59.000 I don't.
00:59:59.000 I have a dog.
01:00:00.000 I have two cats.
01:00:00.000 I have dogs, too.
01:00:01.000 I have a giant dog. 1.00
01:00:02.000 But my point is that some of the meanest, nastiest shit was being said by vegans. 1.00
01:00:08.000 And I think that they have this green light to be a cunt. 1.00
01:00:12.000 And I think there's a lot of people that what they do is they find areas where they feel like they have the green light. 0.99
01:00:20.000 You know, there's a subject, there's an issue that's come up, and they feel like... 0.99
01:00:24.000 All these fucking people that went after that lion guy. 0.99
01:00:27.000 Like, I'm not saying you should go to Africa and kill a lion, but I don't want to go to Africa and kill... 1.00
01:00:33.000 I don't want to kill anything I'm not going to eat. 0.99
01:00:34.000 But that fucking guy did everything by the book, by the way. 0.99
01:00:37.000 He killed a lion with a name was his mistake. 1.00
01:00:40.000 Well, here's my favorite part of it. 1.00
01:00:42.000 Not just the protests and everybody standing outside of his fucking clinic and ruining his business. 0.99
01:00:46.000 Right. 0.99
01:00:47.000 My favorite part was, they were worried about his brother. 0.99
01:00:51.000 The brother of the lion, Cecil's brother, was- what the fuck was his name? 0.98
01:00:55.000 I forget the brother's name. 0.95
01:00:57.000 But Cecil had a brother, and the brother was also killed, and everybody was freaking out.
01:01:03.000 Oh my god!
01:01:04.000 And then they found that it wasn't the brother, there was just another lion, and everyone was relieved.
01:01:08.000 It's hard to tell them apart. 0.99
01:01:09.000 Some no-name fucking lion. 1.00
01:01:10.000 So if the lion doesn't have a name, that lion ain't shit. 1.00
01:01:13.000 He's riding Cecil's coattails, see? 0.99
01:01:15.000 Did you read the letter from the guy from Zimbabwe?
01:01:17.000 Yes!
01:01:17.000 Yes!
01:01:17.000 And did you see the numbers of how many people get killed by lions every year?
01:01:20.000 Yes!
01:01:20.000 It's like 256 a year.
01:01:22.000 Yes!
01:01:22.000 Did you see The Ghost in the Darkness?
01:01:23.000 Yes, I did.
01:01:24.000 That's a nightmare.
01:01:24.000 It's a great movie.
01:01:25.000 It's Val Kilmer when he was young and sleek and sexy.
01:01:28.000 I know. 1.00
01:01:28.000 It's good fucking movies. 1.00
01:01:29.000 Michael Douglas was in that movie, too. 1.00
01:01:30.000 Badass.
01:01:30.000 I think Al Roker is Val Kilmer in a fat suit.
01:01:33.000 We haven't seen him in so long.
01:01:34.000 Well, Val Kilmer slimmed down considerably from that meme.
01:01:37.000 Have you seen the meme, I Used to Be Batman?
01:01:39.000 Yeah.
01:01:40.000 That was Joel Schumacher. 1.00
01:01:43.000 Rubber nipples, bitch! 1.00
01:01:44.000 Yeah, he was a director. 1.00
01:01:45.000 Remember when Val Kilmer was there?
01:01:47.000 Val Kilmer was a good Batman, though.
01:01:49.000 I thought he was good.
01:01:50.000 That's one of those films I went back and watched, and I was like, Batman and Robin was bad.
01:01:54.000 That was really bad.
01:01:55.000 But Batman Forever was...
01:01:56.000 And I went back and watched it, and I was like, I wish I would have just...
01:01:59.000 Who was Robin?
01:02:01.000 Chris O'Donnell.
01:02:02.000 Oh, that's...
01:02:02.000 Whatever happened to that guy?
01:02:04.000 I think he has some show.
01:02:05.000 Alicia Silverstone was Batgirl, too.
01:02:07.000 And then she's like a vegan PETA person now.
01:02:10.000 Oh, wasn't he Chris O'Donnell with LL Cool J in some crime show?
01:02:15.000 Oh, Christ.
01:02:16.000 Even talking about that just dropped my IQ. That wasn't a film Rennie Harlan directed, and he did all those.
01:02:25.000 I think he's made of milk.
01:02:27.000 Yeah, there he goes.
01:02:27.000 Hey, guys.
01:02:28.000 Remember when I was Batman?
01:02:30.000 You know what's weird is I don't know how you let it get that far.
01:02:34.000 How about Marlon Brando?
01:02:35.000 You ever see On the Waterfront and then see The Last Days?
01:02:38.000 The Last Days of Marlon Brando?
01:02:39.000 I think he's very overrated.
01:02:41.000 As an actor?
01:02:42.000 Yeah.
01:02:42.000 I was a much bigger fan of James Dean than Marlon Brando.
01:02:44.000 Well, it was a different time.
01:02:45.000 But if you go to On the Waterfront and compare it to anything anybody else was doing back then...
01:02:49.000 No, I disagree.
01:02:50.000 Really?
01:02:50.000 Yeah.
01:02:51.000 The perfect scene is James Dean in Rebel Without a Cause...
01:02:55.000 And it's so bizarre, because he was kind of like one of the first naturalists.
01:02:59.000 If you look the way he spoke, it was pretty natural.
01:03:04.000 But everyone else in the scene was still...
01:03:06.000 So he was like, Oh, Mom, you're tearing me apart.
01:03:09.000 Leave me alone.
01:03:10.000 Well, that's a fine way to behave, young man.
01:03:12.000 He gets it from his mother, see?
01:03:13.000 And then you go to James, and he's sitting there talking, and you're like, this is real.
01:03:17.000 So you can just see when that transition happened.
01:03:21.000 And I think James Dean, when he was alive, didn't get the respect Brando did.
01:03:26.000 I don't know.
01:03:26.000 I didn't really pay attention to who got respect.
01:03:29.000 But I thought Brando was pretty good and on the waterfront, especially in comparison to the rest of the era. 0.52
01:03:33.000 You want to talk gay? 0.68
01:03:35.000 James Dean? 0.72
01:03:36.000 No, well, yeah, but I mean the outfit, the wild one with Marlon Brando, the little leather mailman hat and the handkerchief.
01:03:43.000 Well, you know when that became gay, Judas Priest came around. 1.00
01:03:47.000 Right. 0.95
01:03:47.000 That's when it became gay. 0.95
01:03:49.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:03:49.000 Because Rob Halford's gay as fuck. 1.00
01:03:51.000 Well, they started- You got everybody dressing gay. 1.00
01:03:53.000 They didn't even know they were dressing gay.
01:03:54.000 They just wanted to be like, Judas Priest, you've got another thing coming down.
01:03:59.000 Do you think Marlon Brando would have dressed that way if he knew that was coming down the pike? 0.93
01:04:03.000 I don't know.
01:04:04.000 Yeah.
01:04:05.000 I mean, that's gotta be tough, because you're a sex symbol and you're Marlon Brando, and then, like, this is going to become the iconic, you know, Mr. Slave outfit. 0.98
01:04:11.000 Yeah, but Marlon Brando clearly didn't give a fuck about anything. 0.99
01:04:15.000 He didn't give a fuck about the way he looked. 0.99
01:04:16.000 He didn't give a fuck about his health. 1.00
01:04:18.000 I mean, he was crazy. 0.99
01:04:20.000 Towards the end of his life, I mean, he was completely out of his mind.
01:04:23.000 Yeah.
01:04:23.000 I don't think it really mattered to him.
01:04:26.000 He wasn't the same rider, I don't think, that James Dean was on a motorcycle.
01:04:29.000 Really?
01:04:30.000 From what I understand, James Dean was pretty...
01:04:31.000 Well, I actually got to sit in...
01:04:34.000 You know, there were only something like 14 cars that James Dean...
01:04:38.000 The Spyder, Ferrari, whatever it is.
01:04:39.000 I don't know a lot about cars.
01:04:41.000 What it is...
01:04:42.000 Was it a Porsche?
01:04:42.000 The one that killed them.
01:04:43.000 Okay.
01:04:44.000 Really, really low?
01:04:45.000 Well, actually, what's funny is I bought my car.
01:04:47.000 It was a 2003 Taurus, but it was in the back of this car shop in Dallas where this guy has done like George Bush's car.
01:04:53.000 He just decks him out.
01:04:54.000 And he was just this old guy who was selling his old car.
01:04:57.000 And they showed me that.
01:04:58.000 It was like some absurd...
01:04:59.000 I could be wrong, like a million, two million dollars.
01:05:02.000 They said James Dean's was lot 13 or 14, and this was like lot 11 or 12. And it was one of those exact cars.
01:05:09.000 Yeah.
01:05:09.000 And I just looked at it, and I'm like, it's like a go-kart.
01:05:11.000 You're so low to the ground, that's got to be tough to control.
01:05:14.000 It's actually easier to control because it's low to the ground, and it's very lightweight.
01:05:18.000 Those are pretty easy to control for the time, but if you compare that to a Boxster today, like a Porsche Boxster, the Boxster is a way more competent car.
01:05:28.000 But those cars were 100% mechanical.
01:05:31.000 When you're buying a car today like that, like a Boxster, You're dealing with all sorts of traction control, stability management.
01:05:39.000 There's all sorts of behind-the-scenes computer-aided shit going on, anti-lock braking systems.
01:05:45.000 There's all sorts of stuff that's happening behind the scenes. 0.86
01:05:48.000 I just know when I saw it, it was one of those things where...
01:05:51.000 That's a perfect example.
01:05:53.000 My dad explained some things to me this way as a kid, right?
01:05:55.000 I saw that car.
01:05:56.000 I don't know a lot about cars at all.
01:05:58.000 I mean, I was buying a Taurus.
01:05:59.000 I was like, oh, okay, that's pretty cool.
01:06:01.000 He told me, so he told me the exact same truth that he could have told you.
01:06:05.000 But if you'd have seen that car, you'd probably, oh my god, want to look in and be really interested in it.
01:06:09.000 We both saw the same car, we both experienced the same thing, but it's an entirely different experience.
01:06:15.000 Right.
01:06:15.000 And that's just kind of the way, the human condition.
01:06:18.000 Sure.
01:06:18.000 Which I just find sort of fascinating.
01:06:20.000 Like to me, I was like, oh, okay, that's pretty cool.
01:06:21.000 Let me go by my doors.
01:06:22.000 Yeah, if you don't know, I mean, if you showed me like an old golf club or something like that, I wouldn't know shit about it.
01:06:26.000 But if you show me like an old pool cue, like a balabushka from like 1965, I'd be like, oh.
01:06:31.000 Right.
01:06:32.000 You know, I just, I know pool cues.
01:06:34.000 Well, it's like people who don't get jiu-jitsu.
01:06:36.000 Yes.
01:06:36.000 You talk to them about it and they're like, well, you wear little cotton belts and you're like, no, Well, that's one of my main things that I have to do when fights go to the ground, is explain all the...
01:06:44.000 Like, if I was doing commentary and it was only black belts listening, my commentary would be infinitely shorter. 1.00
01:06:51.000 Right.
01:06:51.000 Because, you know, everybody would know kind of what's going on.
01:06:54.000 Yeah.
01:06:54.000 You know, triangle setups.
01:06:56.000 I mean, you'd be going...
01:06:57.000 Like, when we do these fight companion podcasts, we do them, like, sometimes we do them with Eddie Bravo, and when we're watching situations, we're talking about, like, some guy going for his...
01:07:06.000 He's going for the armbar.
01:07:07.000 We know.
01:07:08.000 I don't have to say.
01:07:09.000 What he's got to do now, he's got to be careful of the left arm.
01:07:11.000 If he gets the left arm past a certain position, now he's not in danger because it's past the elbow.
01:07:15.000 So there's a whole...
01:07:17.000 What I'm trying to do when I'm doing commentary for the UFC when the fights go to the ground is help people that I know are watching this to just see a jumble of bodies.
01:07:25.000 Yeah.
01:07:26.000 Well, even sport jiu-jitsu for people who do jiu-jitsu is not very entertaining.
01:07:29.000 Especially with the gi.
01:07:30.000 With the Gi, it's a real problem. 1.00
01:07:32.000 It's a real problem because it's boring as fuck. 0.99
01:07:34.000 Do you think it's gotten to the point? 0.99
01:07:35.000 My dad and I were talking.
01:07:36.000 I mean, my dad's actually a purple belt.
01:07:38.000 That's pretty cool.
01:07:39.000 He's 55. He started in his 50s.
01:07:40.000 That's awesome.
01:07:41.000 And he actually hasn't had a point scored against him.
01:07:43.000 Really?
01:07:44.000 Is he a beast?
01:07:44.000 You're a big guy.
01:07:45.000 He's probably a giant, huh?
01:07:46.000 Yeah.
01:07:46.000 Well, he played hockey at U of M. He's a real athlete, and he's stayed in shape.
01:07:50.000 So we actually...
01:07:50.000 I'll show you a video afterward.
01:07:52.000 So he's competed all the way through blue to get his purple, not even had a point scored against him.
01:07:56.000 Wow.
01:07:57.000 And his thing, though, is very strong takedowns, top control, pass.
01:08:01.000 And...
01:08:02.000 In practice, he'll roll with guys who are doing the reverse De La Riva and all this stuff.
01:08:06.000 And my dad and I believe, and I don't know if you think, somebody did taekwondo.
01:08:11.000 Taekwondo at one point where there was some combat relevance.
01:08:13.000 And then when you get into the Olympic, it's really not anymore. 0.97
01:08:15.000 I feel like sport jiu-jitsu has gone in that direction where you have a guy who can be the best in the world in a 125 division with a gi who would get his ass kicked by a hockey player in a street fight. 1.00
01:08:27.000 And to me, you sort of lost your... 0.71
01:08:28.000 Well, not if the hockey player weighed 125 pounds.
01:08:31.000 Well, a hockey player getting started at 200, you know, is my point.
01:08:34.000 My dad, when he got started, he would pull a gi over their head, because that was a hockey thing. 0.89
01:08:38.000 Right, right, right.
01:08:39.000 You can do, Darren, you can do.
01:08:41.000 But why can't you do that? 1.00
01:08:42.000 I think gis are stupid. 1.00
01:08:43.000 I mean, if you can take the collar, if you can take someone's fucking, the bottom of the jacket and wrap it all the way around his neck, Why can't you pull it over the head? 1.00
01:08:53.000 Stupid. 0.99
01:08:54.000 I mean, and that's the thing, is it's a weird situation getting into it, and it's no longer really combat relevant. 1.00
01:08:59.000 And we have a lot of guys who are, you know, the CrossFit thing and all this ridiculous sort of strength training that's come into it, and they never get strong.
01:09:07.000 Wait a minute, the CrossFit thing?
01:09:08.000 They don't get strong?
01:09:09.000 What do you mean?
01:09:10.000 No.
01:09:10.000 Cross, well, you should have Mark Riptoe on.
01:09:12.000 He'll talk about that.
01:09:13.000 I mean, with strength training, you need linear progression that's measurable when you're starting.
01:09:16.000 A guy like you, right, you can do anything now because you have a strength base.
01:09:21.000 Someone who's never lifted heavy weights and added five pounds incrementally is not going to get a lot out of battle ropes and snatches for five minutes.
01:09:29.000 He's not going to get a lot out of it.
01:09:30.000 He needs to increase his maximal strength.
01:09:32.000 So we have kids come in like, no man, I saw this.
01:09:34.000 This is what I'm doing.
01:09:35.000 It's the new strength thing.
01:09:36.000 They never get stronger.
01:09:37.000 They never get bigger.
01:09:38.000 And we started, and my dad is still of this philosophy, you start because you want to be a sovereign man.
01:09:44.000 You want to be able to defend yourself.
01:09:46.000 And if you're at a point where you double guard pole and you reverse De La Riva and you're no longer able to actually protect yourself...
01:09:54.000 I don't know.
01:09:55.000 I feel like it's lost.
01:09:56.000 I mean, Hoyce Gracie is a good example.
01:09:57.000 You know, he wouldn't do well in sport jiu-jitsu, but he was big enough.
01:10:00.000 He was strong enough to get it done and protect himself and win altercations.
01:10:04.000 Well, the game has passed him by in a lot of ways, but I think that there are a lot of guys in sport jiu-jitsu that would do great, like Cyborg.
01:10:14.000 Right.
01:10:16.000 Look at Ryan Hall right now on the show.
01:10:18.000 Yeah, great.
01:10:19.000 I rolled with him when I was a white belt.
01:10:20.000 Yeah.
01:10:21.000 No, he's a badass.
01:10:22.000 There's a lot of really great jujitsu guys, but I agree with you like 50-50 guard. 0.98
01:10:26.000 There's a lot of silly shit that guys are doing that just doesn't seem like... 0.98
01:10:30.000 It's also kind of boring to watch in a lot of ways. 0.98
01:10:34.000 But then there's like Nogi, like Eddie Cummins, guys like Gary Tonin, who are like super aggressive, very, you know, submission-oriented.
01:10:43.000 There's a lot of guys.
01:10:43.000 Marcelo Garcia, very aggressive.
01:10:45.000 Rolled with him.
01:10:45.000 Submission-oriented, attacking style.
01:10:49.000 So there's going to be guys in the Taekwondo days that just play point style.
01:10:54.000 But there was always guys back then that were terrifying because they would knock guys dead.
01:10:58.000 Even during Taekwondo competition days, I remember there was this guy from the Ivory Coast that everybody was terrified of. 0.99
01:11:04.000 His name was Patrice Remarque.
01:11:06.000 Because his style of attacking was so much different than everybody else's.
01:11:10.000 Everybody else was playing this sort of, not everybody, but a lot of people were playing this sort of point game. 0.99
01:11:14.000 And this fucking dude was this, like, shredded black guy from the Ivory Coast that would kick through you. 1.00
01:11:21.000 Why do you have to say blank? 1.00
01:11:21.000 Why is that necessary? 1.00
01:11:22.000 He's from Africa.
01:11:23.000 He's in Africa. 1.00
01:11:23.000 Africa's fuck. 1.00
01:11:24.000 Well, he could be white from Africa. 1.00
01:11:26.000 A white guy from Africa.
01:11:27.000 That accent almost seems fake.
01:11:29.000 The South African accent?
01:11:30.000 Black from Africa.
01:11:33.000 Yeah, it's like a Dutch thing, right?
01:11:36.000 There were Dutch settlers that came to South Africa.
01:11:39.000 The South African almost sounds like they're faking an Australian accent.
01:11:42.000 Like a bad comic, like, I'm Australian, right?
01:11:45.000 You're like, that's not real.
01:11:46.000 It's like, oh, it's just South Africa.
01:11:47.000 Well, that's when we saw the two collide on Lethal Weapon.
01:11:51.000 Remember?
01:11:52.000 Mel Gibson had at it with the apartheid guy.
01:11:56.000 The apartheid. 0.72
01:11:57.000 What did he call them?
01:11:58.000 Kefir.
01:11:59.000 I don't know.
01:12:00.000 This wasn't the first one, was it?
01:12:01.000 No, it was down the line.
01:12:03.000 But he was like, Danny Glover was a black guy. 0.94
01:12:06.000 He had a bad name for black guys. 1.00
01:12:08.000 Danny Glover's too old for that shit, you know? 1.00
01:12:10.000 He is. 1.00
01:12:10.000 Too old for that shit. 1.00
01:12:13.000 When you go back and watch it and you realize that Mel Gibson is crazy, you go back and watch those and you can kind of see the flashes. 1.00
01:12:19.000 You're like, oh yeah, that makes sense.
01:12:21.000 But do you think that Mel Gibson got crazy?
01:12:23.000 Or do you think he always was crazy?
01:12:24.000 No, I think...
01:12:25.000 I mean...
01:12:27.000 I've spoken actually with some people who worked in Passion of the Christ, and I think he got so much heat for that.
01:12:32.000 I mean, you talk about sort of like social justice warriors.
01:12:35.000 He got so many people who went after him, and I just don't think he was expecting or used to that kind of pressure.
01:12:40.000 I think, have you ever heard of the voicemails?
01:12:43.000 Oh, yeah.
01:12:44.000 To me, that is the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life.
01:12:46.000 Well, it's funny to me, but it's sad because he's an old guy. 1.00
01:12:50.000 He's dating this Russian assassin, you know, and she's stealing his cum and making babies. 1.00
01:12:56.000 The thing that's so funny to me... 1.00
01:12:58.000 Is he's like off the wall angry, right?
01:13:00.000 For people who haven't heard it. 1.00
01:13:01.000 Shut up and blow me! 1.00
01:13:03.000 Because I deserve it! 1.00
01:13:04.000 But then he goes, he starts yelling.
01:13:06.000 My friend and I, I sit there, go, okay, listen, listen.
01:13:07.000 And I cue it up.
01:13:08.000 I let people listen for context.
01:13:09.000 I go, this is the funniest thing you'll ever hear.
01:13:11.000 And no one laughs except for me and my producer, Gay Jared, where he's like, you have no soul! 1.00
01:13:16.000 You have no soul! 0.58
01:13:21.000 But I will give you one more chance.
01:13:23.000 And I don't know why, I just find like anyone who's been through a breakup where you're like, I want to tell her off, but I want to make it work.
01:13:28.000 Does he say that?
01:13:29.000 I will give you one more chance?
01:13:30.000 But I will give you one more chance.
01:13:31.000 And she goes, I don't want another chance.
01:13:33.000 What?
01:13:35.000 I don't want, what?
01:13:36.000 It just goes crazy.
01:13:37.000 And to me, it's just like the pain.
01:13:38.000 Do I think it was horrible, the things he said?
01:13:41.000 Yeah, but anyone who's been in like one of those horrible breakups and you feel like you're not being heard has felt that anger.
01:13:48.000 And then he tries to pull it back.
01:13:49.000 I will give He needs better friends.
01:13:52.000 Well, Robert Downey's his best friend.
01:13:54.000 Really?
01:13:54.000 Yeah, they're close friends.
01:13:55.000 Robert Downey Jr.?
01:13:56.000 That's what he said?
01:13:57.000 Yeah, he came out and introduced him at some award thing.
01:13:59.000 Hmm.
01:14:00.000 Interesting. 0.90
01:14:01.000 Wonder if Robert Downey Jr. hates the Jews as well.
01:14:05.000 I don't think I'll come out and say it. 0.79
01:14:06.000 Because Mel Gibson, you just get a couple cocktails into him and apparently he just starts hating the Jews.
01:14:13.000 I don't think it's the cocktails that make him hate the Jews.
01:14:16.000 No, but that's what gets it out of him. 0.99
01:14:18.000 There's people that got him pulled over in Malibu, the cops that pulled him over were saying he's just fucking spouting out all this fucking anti-Jew stuff. 1.00
01:14:24.000 Called the one cop sugar tits. 1.00
01:14:26.000 Oh, that's right. 0.99
01:14:27.000 I don't know why.
01:14:28.000 I find it really funny.
01:14:29.000 I know it's terrible and people pull this up against me as an example of being racist.
01:14:33.000 I just find that pain funny because everyone's felt it and then he tries to pull it back.
01:14:41.000 I don't know why in my head.
01:14:43.000 It is funny.
01:14:45.000 Think about the pain of everything you just said. 1.00
01:14:48.000 You hope she gets raped by a pack of N-words and all that stuff. 1.00
01:14:51.000 Oh, that's right. 1.00
01:14:51.000 I forgot about that part. 1.00
01:14:54.000 A pack of wild N-words, right? 0.56
01:14:57.000 Wasn't it?
01:14:57.000 Like they're just roaming.
01:14:58.000 They're wild.
01:14:59.000 Like that's what they do. 1.00
01:15:00.000 Yeah, like fucking lions. 1.00
01:15:03.000 But you know what, though? 1.00
01:15:04.000 The crazy thing is? 0.99
01:15:05.000 You don't know that he hates black people. 0.99
01:15:08.000 No. 0.96
01:15:09.000 He could have, like, you know, Michael Richards.
01:15:11.000 Well, he's in those movies with Danny Glover.
01:15:12.000 They seem to get along wonderfully.
01:15:14.000 And that's one thing I've talked about with people.
01:15:15.000 People go, oh, you're going to say you have a black friend now?
01:15:17.000 Here's the thing.
01:15:19.000 If you have a lot of black friends...
01:15:20.000 Do you have black friends over for dinner?
01:15:22.000 Do I? Aside from Tony Camacho?
01:15:24.000 Yes.
01:15:25.000 Yeah, plenty of black friends.
01:15:27.000 Okay.
01:15:27.000 But the point is...
01:15:28.000 When was the last time a black guy was over your house for dinner? 0.76
01:15:30.000 Probably been a while. 0.92
01:15:31.000 I'm hoping you don't ask me.
01:15:32.000 You caught me. 0.98
01:15:34.000 You're coming back telling me about some black guy, shot someone at the comedy store, and you're going to put me in the hot seat, leave a black guy home for dinner? 1.00
01:15:40.000 Well, I don't know that guy. 0.97
01:15:40.000 Would you feed him? 0.97
01:15:41.000 Was it grass-fed?
01:15:42.000 Did you feed him grass-fed?
01:15:43.000 Grass-fed?
01:15:44.000 I don't know.
01:15:45.000 Otherwise, I don't know.
01:15:45.000 It's like, bring out the corn-fed steak.
01:15:47.000 He's a Negro. 1.00
01:15:48.000 I mean, what do you think? 0.98
01:15:49.000 Is that a bad steak?
01:15:50.000 You're all into the grass-fed.
01:15:52.000 I am, but I eat corn-fed beef, too.
01:15:54.000 Really?
01:15:54.000 Yeah, it's not bad.
01:15:55.000 It's fatty.
01:15:56.000 Sometimes it tastes delicious.
01:15:58.000 A nice corn-fed prime rib.
01:15:59.000 I don't have the Joe Rogan salary, so it's mostly corn-fed.
01:16:02.000 Well, is grass-fed that much more expensive?
01:16:04.000 Oh my gosh, it's so much more.
01:16:05.000 You make some money.
01:16:06.000 Although, I've never hunted, but my uncle-in-law has a cider mill up in northern Michigan, and all the deer just keep eating his apples.
01:16:15.000 So he was like, listen, I have a permit, something absurd, I don't know the number, to kill like five a month or something, because they're just constantly eating his apples.
01:16:21.000 He's like, you want to come up?
01:16:22.000 And I was like, I mean, I'm not a hunter, but I could literally just sit there in a lawn chair with my.357, take a couple of them out while they're eating some Fugees. 1.00
01:16:30.000 A.357?
01:16:31.000 Yeah, they changed the law.
01:16:32.000 You can hunt with handgun cartridges.
01:16:33.000 Yeah, but you don't want to.
01:16:35.000 Actually,.357 out of a rifle has ballistics that are higher than mid-caliber rifle stuff.
01:16:39.000 Well, the rifle is just more accurate, is what I'm saying.
01:16:42.000 Yeah, but out of a six-inch barrel handgun,.357, you're actually going to get really surprising ballistics.
01:16:47.000 But you have to be really close, is what I'm saying.
01:16:49.000 They're going to eat a Red Delicious right in front of me.
01:16:51.000 How far?
01:16:53.000 Probably from me to you.
01:16:54.000 These things love the apples.
01:16:55.000 That's the point.
01:16:55.000 They get that close?
01:16:56.000 Yeah, they just eat the apples.
01:16:57.000 They go nuts.
01:16:58.000 I'm peeing all over the cider orchard property because apparently it helps. 1.00
01:17:02.000 And you're just like, listen, you want to kill them? 0.98
01:17:03.000 I know a guy who will process them right down the road. 0.99
01:17:05.000 It's delicious meat, especially if they're eating apples.
01:17:07.000 I love venison.
01:17:08.000 I just don't know how to cut out the anus. 1.00
01:17:10.000 That's not hard. 0.51
01:17:11.000 It makes me nervous.
01:17:12.000 If you know how to operate a microphone, you can figure that out.
01:17:15.000 I don't think I've done a stellar job of that today.
01:17:17.000 I'm not used to the...
01:17:19.000 It's not hard.
01:17:20.000 But yeah, gutting them, you get used to it.
01:17:23.000 It becomes normal.
01:17:24.000 You understand where to go and how to cut around.
01:17:26.000 Well, they've opened it up in Michigan because it's just a real problem.
01:17:29.000 They're eating everything.
01:17:31.000 We pulled it up the other day.
01:17:33.000 There was a number of the amount of driving accidents involving deer.
01:17:38.000 Deer hit in Michigan.
01:17:40.000 And it was like 40,000.
01:17:42.000 Pull that up again, Jamie.
01:17:43.000 That's why I won't ride the motorcycle out there in any rural area with a deer.
01:17:48.000 It's insane.
01:17:48.000 Yeah.
01:17:49.000 I mean, people who live in urban environments, they get upset at hunting, they don't understand.
01:17:53.000 You literally don't understand.
01:17:55.000 These animals have vastly overpopulated to the point where they bring in hunters in suburban Pennsylvania because they have no limits.
01:18:04.000 You can shoot as many as you want all day long, all year long, and they bring people in just to try to...
01:18:09.000 Pennsylvania? 0.64
01:18:09.000 ...in a lot of parts of Pennsylvania. 0.64
01:18:11.000 I don't know specifically which counties, but I know that these guys that I know that are bow hunters, they fly them out to Pennsylvania and they film shows where they're essentially in these fucking people's yards. 0.81
01:18:22.000 And they set up tree stands. 0.97
01:18:24.000 And I'm not kidding.
01:18:25.000 It's a nice yard, but suburban neighborhood, nice street, big houses.
01:18:29.000 It's a nice yard.
01:18:29.000 It is.
01:18:29.000 It's a home.
01:18:31.000 Like, that's got like several acres, like two or three acres, and they have tree stands set up, and they're just killing as many deer as walk their way.
01:18:38.000 I can imagine. 0.96
01:18:39.000 Yeah, and they have to, because driving accidents are fucking crazy. 0.67
01:18:43.000 So many people hit them. 0.94
01:18:44.000 Yeah.
01:18:45.000 I just,.357 is my gun of choice.
01:18:47.000 That's your gun of choice?
01:18:48.000 Why is that?
01:18:50.000 Sounds good.
01:18:51.000 A.357 handgun out of a four-inch barrel is going to have better ballistics than any other caliber for self-defense.
01:19:00.000 And the reason why is I have a giant bucket of.38s and giant bucket of.37s with lever-action rifles, different handguns, and my wife doesn't need to worry about what goes into where. 1.00
01:19:09.000 And I have a beautiful, almost collector's item, an old.357 Smith& Wesson.
01:19:15.000 An old one from where?
01:19:17.000 Smith& Wesson, it's like an 81. It's not that, but it's before they have the internal lock, and it's nickel-plated.
01:19:26.000 It's just beautiful.
01:19:27.000 It's my favorite.
01:19:28.000 The trigger on that thing is just butter smooth.
01:19:30.000 Here's the number.
01:19:31.000 Average of 134 deer vehicle crashes each day. 1.00
01:19:36.000 Holy shit! 1.00
01:19:39.000 Holy shit! 1.00
01:19:40.000 For 2012, resulted in 1,329 injuries and 8 deaths. 0.99
01:19:48.000 Wow. 0.99
01:19:49.000 Just kill those things. 1.00
01:19:50.000 Yeah, well, they're food. 1.00
01:19:52.000 You know, that's the thing about them.
01:19:55.000 I've never been on it, but I would do it.
01:19:57.000 You should.
01:19:58.000 It's not bad.
01:19:59.000 It's fun to do.
01:20:00.000 I don't think it's bad.
01:20:01.000 People don't want to say it's fun for some reason.
01:20:04.000 I don't understand that.
01:20:06.000 It's ethical and it's fun.
01:20:07.000 It is fun.
01:20:08.000 Why deny that it's fun?
01:20:10.000 It's fun and it's productive.
01:20:12.000 Yeah, it is definitely productive.
01:20:13.000 Certainly more productive than shooting at the range.
01:20:15.000 Well, especially if you want to eat healthy meat that's natural and organic, and especially if you want to help control the population of these animals.
01:20:24.000 Because there's only one other way.
01:20:26.000 You're going to bring in wolves?
01:20:27.000 What are you going to do?
01:20:27.000 Bring in mountain lions and have them run through the streets of Pennsylvania?
01:20:30.000 Come on. 1.00
01:20:31.000 I mean, you don't really have a lot of other options for controlling the populations of these fucking animals. 0.99
01:20:35.000 We had a bobcat in our yard, and Hopper, our dog, like, went after that thing. 0.99
01:20:39.000 They're cool looking.
01:20:40.000 They're cool.
01:20:41.000 They look weird, right?
01:20:42.000 He can't catch it, but he would have messed it up.
01:20:43.000 I had one of those in my yard once.
01:20:44.000 It was the weirdest thing. 1.00
01:20:45.000 I was like, what is that fucking cat? 0.99
01:20:47.000 They have, like, the wolverine kind of thing. 1.00
01:20:49.000 They have, like, the tips of their ears are, like, fucking weird looking. 0.96
01:20:52.000 I was like, what is that? 0.98
01:20:53.000 Yeah.
01:20:54.000 It's very strange looking.
01:20:55.000 Their back legs look longer than they should be.
01:20:57.000 Yeah, it's a weird sort of body dynamic.
01:21:01.000 Yeah.
01:21:02.000 Yeah, our dog went nuts for it.
01:21:04.000 If he'd have been able to catch it, he would have killed it. 0.98
01:21:07.000 He would have killed it? 1.00
01:21:08.000 Yeah.
01:21:08.000 How big is your dog?
01:21:10.000 He's a dog Argentino.
01:21:11.000 Oh, okay. 1.00
01:21:12.000 That's a big fucking dog. 1.00
01:21:13.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:21:13.000 Well, I think Ronda Rousey has one. 1.00
01:21:15.000 He's a little bigger.
01:21:16.000 He was a rescue.
01:21:17.000 That's another thing.
01:21:18.000 A perfect example of leftists and animal rights.
01:21:20.000 We have a rescue.
01:21:21.000 He came to us with a broken leg, balding, Lyme disease.
01:21:26.000 He wasn't the perfect dog.
01:21:28.000 We've basically brought him back to health.
01:21:30.000 I volunteered at shelters, helped with them.
01:21:32.000 But you know what?
01:21:33.000 I also tell people, if you have kids, you probably shouldn't adopt a dog.
01:21:37.000 You probably should get it from a puppy and raise your kids and know about that dog.
01:21:41.000 Yeah.
01:21:41.000 He's perfect for us.
01:21:42.000 He's a little bit racist.
01:21:44.000 I'm not going to lie.
01:21:44.000 I don't know.
01:21:46.000 And he's a white dog. 0.58
01:21:47.000 He's stark white. 0.99
01:21:48.000 Your dog is racist? 0.99
01:21:49.000 Well, you know what's funny? 0.99
01:21:50.000 He loves black men.
01:21:52.000 Older women, black boys. 1.00
01:21:54.000 Black boys? 0.99
01:21:55.000 Like 12-year-old black boys. 0.97
01:21:56.000 He's just a little leery. 0.65
01:21:59.000 Specifically them.
01:21:59.000 And he's not aggressive, but you just see he wants to be pet by everyone.
01:22:02.000 He's the most friendly, pack-ranted dog.
01:22:04.000 Younger black boys, he's like, no. 1.00
01:22:07.000 Wow. 0.96
01:22:07.000 And he's all white. 0.96
01:22:08.000 So that's all we need. 1.00
01:22:08.000 Well, there are a lot of dogs that are fucking sketchy as hell around kids. 1.00
01:22:12.000 I had a friend who had a pit bull that was really sketchy around kids. 0.99
01:22:15.000 And it's just, he had never been around kids, and kids to him looked like little animals.
01:22:20.000 Like, he didn't understand what they were.
01:22:22.000 Well, it's unstable.
01:22:23.000 Yeah.
01:22:23.000 Our dog actually, Hopper, he's a, if my wife and I argue at all, or if we're ranting about our day, like I have to be careful when I do the radio show, he'll sit in the corner, look in the corner, and shake.
01:22:34.000 He gets upset?
01:22:35.000 But it'll actually shake.
01:22:36.000 Oh, so like he was abused?
01:22:37.000 He just, when we pulled out a musket for a video, we did like a...
01:22:40.000 Never before in front of him.
01:22:41.000 He pulled it out, barking like crazy.
01:22:44.000 Showing his, foaming at the mouth with the musket.
01:22:45.000 Whoa.
01:22:46.000 So we don't know.
01:22:47.000 You don't know what he's seen.
01:22:48.000 No, and if you're a kid and you're pulling a cap gun, oh my god!
01:22:51.000 You know, it's like the woman who had her face ripped off by a chip.
01:22:54.000 I had a female rescue dog that if you raised your voice, she would just drop to the ground and cower. 1.00
01:23:00.000 Yeah.
01:23:00.000 You couldn't say, what are you doing over there?
01:23:02.000 Right.
01:23:03.000 She had been beaten. 0.99
01:23:04.000 And the other dogs that I had from the time they were puppies, you'd be like, what the fuck's going on with her? 0.99
01:23:08.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:23:08.000 Jesus Christ. 0.99
01:23:09.000 Yeah.
01:23:09.000 Do you know how this house works?
01:23:10.000 Well, that's the whole thing.
01:23:11.000 The guy yells.
01:23:12.000 Yeah, exactly.
01:23:13.000 You have to, um, we actually tried to rescue another dog and a lady wouldn't give it to us because she found out my politics. 1.00
01:23:19.000 True story.
01:23:20.000 Oh, come on. 0.87
01:23:21.000 I swear to you.
01:23:22.000 What?
01:23:23.000 Yeah.
01:23:23.000 Come on.
01:23:24.000 Really?
01:23:25.000 Yep.
01:23:25.000 Dog's name is Mr. Big.
01:23:26.000 I wonder how he's doing to this day. 1.00
01:23:27.000 Well, she's probably a crazy cunt. 1.00
01:23:30.000 She was a super hippie, and she was looking for a reason. 1.00
01:23:34.000 And so it was this shelter where you have to go in for a whole weekend and learn all these dogs.
01:23:39.000 So it was actually where I ended up volunteering.
01:23:41.000 And this one dog everyone was scared of, he was like an American bulldog mix.
01:23:44.000 So he was about 120 pounds, called Mr. Big.
01:23:47.000 And he would just fall at the mouth and be barking at the...
01:23:50.000 Fence?
01:23:50.000 Fence, yeah, but they all have their own individual runs in this one.
01:23:53.000 And you just go in, he's just excited.
01:23:55.000 So no one wanted to take him out.
01:23:57.000 He was just great.
01:23:58.000 And what really got her mad was we had to watch this dog training video.
01:24:02.000 And I was like, how to learn dog body language!
01:24:05.000 And a little writing comes in, like an early 90s VHS. And I went out, and she's like, what'd you think of the source material?
01:24:11.000 I said, you gotta love that early 90s saved by the bell font, right?
01:24:16.000 She wrote something down, and she was furious.
01:24:19.000 Because you made fun of the font?
01:24:20.000 I don't know.
01:24:21.000 I just know I didn't get the dog.
01:24:22.000 That dog could have had a house. 0.98
01:24:23.000 We're happy with our dog, but it breaks my heart to think of him.
01:24:25.000 But how do you know that it was about your politics?
01:24:29.000 Well, she said, because when there was no valid reason, because we know the owner of that place, she said, well, I get to choose who gets what dog, and he's just not the right dog for them.
01:24:40.000 I wouldn't give them any dog, is what she said.
01:24:42.000 I wouldn't give them any dog.
01:24:43.000 Well, how did she know?
01:24:44.000 Did she Google you?
01:24:46.000 Yeah.
01:24:47.000 Well, I came in and the guy who owns it was a fan.
01:24:50.000 He's like this multi-millionaire who's kind of a fan and I think he probably let her know or something and she was...
01:24:55.000 Oh, so he's a fan of yours, but she works for him and she's not a fan, but she gets the ultimate decision?
01:25:00.000 He's very hands-off with that, yeah.
01:25:02.000 Wow.
01:25:03.000 How weird.
01:25:04.000 He's a great guy.
01:25:05.000 He's a great guy, actually, this multi-millionaire and...
01:25:08.000 People just hate him where we are.
01:25:10.000 And you just meet him and he's like, he's made all of his money.
01:25:13.000 What's crazy, and this is sort of something we don't tell kids.
01:25:15.000 I talk with people about this.
01:25:16.000 We say, well, what do you want to be?
01:25:17.000 I want to be a firefighter.
01:25:18.000 You need to ask him what kind of a lifestyle do you want to live?
01:25:21.000 Because this guy's made all of his money off of burger patty machines.
01:25:24.000 Really?
01:25:26.000 And no kid goes, I want to make burger patty machines.
01:25:30.000 But, you know, do you say, hey, you want to never have a boss and have a bank account with tens of millions of dollars?
01:25:35.000 That sounds pretty good.
01:25:36.000 Burger patty machines.
01:25:37.000 Well, this guy's already got the market cornered, though.
01:25:39.000 Maybe tell him something else.
01:25:41.000 Yeah, you know, I don't know.
01:25:42.000 Hot dog machines. 0.99
01:25:43.000 I mean, how many more fucking people can make burger patty machines? 0.99
01:25:46.000 Imagine if you come along with a new one, you know? 0.99
01:25:48.000 He'll fucking box you out of the business. 0.96
01:25:50.000 He's like, listen. 0.99
01:25:51.000 It's the 1%, kid! 0.98
01:25:53.000 Yeah, listen, I got this market cornered.
01:25:55.000 Maybe you need to make hot dog machines. 0.94
01:25:57.000 Well, you know, it's a perfect example.
01:25:58.000 He's rich, we're supposed to hate him, and he's a great guy, and he runs this giant non-kill dog shelter, and he's just like...
01:26:04.000 But everyone just hates him.
01:26:06.000 Oh, okay.
01:26:06.000 Some people.
01:26:08.000 Yeah, you're supposed to hate wealthy folks that are famous, or that are successful, rather.
01:26:11.000 Unless they're actors.
01:26:13.000 Unless they're actors, then you're not...
01:26:14.000 Well, actors talk about the wealthiest 1%, and they go out and they talk about the people, but they don't act.
01:26:20.000 But they are the 1% in a lot of ways.
01:26:22.000 You're the top 1% of the top 1% of 1%.
01:26:25.000 Well, here's what's really crazy.
01:26:26.000 If you make more than $34,000 a year, you're in the 1% of the world.
01:26:31.000 Yeah.
01:26:31.000 You know what you're 1% in the United States?
01:26:33.000 What?
01:26:34.000 $500,000 annual family income.
01:26:36.000 You know what's top 10%?
01:26:37.000 What?
01:26:37.000 $150,000 annual household income.
01:26:39.000 Whoa.
01:26:40.000 So we're actually, we have a video going up right now at the site.
01:26:43.000 Today we're actually launching an AR-15 giveaway, and we have a video on Bernie.
01:26:46.000 Yeah, we're giving them away, folks.
01:26:47.000 Sorry, can I use your show to plug that?
01:26:48.000 Give away AR-15s?
01:26:50.000 Yeah.
01:26:50.000 Do you believe in background checks?
01:26:52.000 Yeah, we do all that.
01:26:53.000 Actually, it's done through AR15.com, and they sell custom AR15s.
01:26:55.000 Well, of course, if you're doing it legally, you have to have background checks.
01:26:58.000 They ship to an FFL. But I'm saying, your politics, do you think that...
01:27:01.000 Well, there are background checks.
01:27:02.000 Yes.
01:27:03.000 Right.
01:27:03.000 That's fine.
01:27:04.000 You don't have a problem with...
01:27:06.000 The gun show loophole.
01:27:07.000 What's that?
01:27:08.000 Is that what you're talking about?
01:27:08.000 The gun show loophole?
01:27:10.000 What gun show loophole?
01:27:10.000 Oh, well, that is an interesting loophole.
01:27:13.000 You know, you can sell guns to people.
01:27:15.000 Well, explain the gun show loophole for people who don't understand.
01:27:18.000 It's just, you know, they say with a background check at a gun show there's a loophole and you can get a gun without a background check.
01:27:22.000 Here's the thing.
01:27:23.000 I think it was Charles Cook who was on one of those cable news networks.
01:27:28.000 Sorry, I have to burp.
01:27:29.000 We're going to have to go ahead.
01:27:30.000 Go ahead.
01:27:30.000 I don't have a cough button here.
01:27:32.000 It's really a quiet burp. 1.00
01:27:33.000 Yeah, this show is real as fuck, dude. 0.99
01:27:36.000 We don't believe in cough. 0.99
01:27:37.000 Actually, we're going to probably put a cough button.
01:27:39.000 Are we going to decide that yet?
01:27:41.000 We didn't really decide.
01:27:42.000 We're thinking about putting a cough button in the next studio.
01:27:44.000 That helps me zero right now.
01:27:46.000 Sorry.
01:27:46.000 Yeah, I'm just talking.
01:27:48.000 My thing is with the gun issue, it's about the intrinsic right to self-preservation.
01:27:53.000 So a good example is, you asked me if I did stand-up.
01:27:57.000 I don't do a ton of it anymore, but I have one next week.
01:28:00.000 When I do any live performance now, there has to be armed security in some kind of a gate.
01:28:05.000 It's just the way it is.
01:28:05.000 Same thing with someone like Ann Coulter, Mylonopoulos.
01:28:07.000 You don't just get to go up and do stand-up anymore. 0.96
01:28:09.000 But Mylon, he shows up at slut walks. 1.00
01:28:12.000 Yeah, I do that too, but that's different from an announced show on a schedule where people can show up and know that you're going to be there.
01:28:19.000 So you have armed security always at all of your shows?
01:28:22.000 If I do it, yeah.
01:28:23.000 Why is that?
01:28:23.000 Because of the crazy death threats.
01:28:25.000 And I don't talk about it a lot because you never want to be the person like Lena Dunham. 0.97
01:28:28.000 I got a death threat because I showed my nipple. 0.77
01:28:30.000 It's like legit when you question Islam and you do those videos and you're on CARES watch list. 0.99
01:28:35.000 You have to be careful. 0.94
01:28:36.000 Well, you did a video that was pretty fucking ballsy where you showed the actual history of Muhammad as opposed to the history of Jesus, like the difference between the Christian religion and the Islamic religion. 0.92
01:28:49.000 Right. 0.99
01:28:49.000 It's pretty ballsy. 0.99
01:28:51.000 And when you did that, is that when...
01:28:53.000 It was before that.
01:28:54.000 That was a sequel.
01:28:55.000 That was the Quran Challenge 2. And I remember this was before I was at Fox News.
01:28:59.000 I called Andrew Breitbart, the first one, and I put it up.
01:29:03.000 I go, there's some backlash, Andrew.
01:29:05.000 Can you help me?
01:29:05.000 He goes, I'm going to get it to the online guy at Fox.
01:29:07.000 And he said, when you're dead, it's a story, kid.
01:29:09.000 And he hung up the phone.
01:29:10.000 What?
01:29:10.000 That's what he said?
01:29:11.000 That's what he said.
01:29:12.000 Oh, that's rude.
01:29:13.000 Yeah.
01:29:13.000 Yeah, that's rude.
01:29:14.000 So the second one, but I mean, even you as someone who doesn't subscribe to either faith, you know, my whole point is you can point to imperfect people on any side of the spectrum, but go to the founders, and there's a huge difference with Muhammad. 0.75
01:29:24.000 So we actually showed, you know, what a six-year-old, nine-year-old girl looks like, who his wife was.
01:29:30.000 It's not the same as a 14-year-old, which was normal.
01:29:32.000 Well, you showed a girl that was actually older than his wife.
01:29:35.000 Yes.
01:29:36.000 Yeah.
01:29:37.000 You showed like an 11-year-old.
01:29:38.000 Is that what you showed?
01:29:39.000 I think so.
01:29:40.000 She was like 10. Actually, her dad is a brilliant jiu-jitsu guy who runs a school in Dallas.
01:29:44.000 It's kind of fucked up when you stop and think about the history of a lot of religious stories. 0.78
01:29:52.000 I mean, if you go back and think about what was acceptable 2,000 years ago, 1,000 years ago, 1,500 years ago, whatever it was. 0.98
01:30:00.000 You're talking about a completely different era.
01:30:02.000 And that's one of the problems with enforcing a lot of religious scripture today.
01:30:08.000 There's many things that people do in the Bible.
01:30:10.000 My favorite is religious people that get tattoos. 0.82
01:30:13.000 If you're a Christian, you get a tattoo. 1.00
01:30:15.000 You've got to read the whole book, because you're not supposed to get tattoos.
01:30:18.000 Well, no, they would argue that Christ came to change the law and abolish the law so they're not beholden to some of the dietary laws or the fabric laws.
01:30:26.000 Bacon.
01:30:27.000 Bacon, yeah, exactly.
01:30:28.000 That's just really what it was.
01:30:29.000 Fabric laws are the best. 0.89
01:30:29.000 The fabric laws. 0.89
01:30:30.000 But do you understand why those exist?
01:30:32.000 You're not allowed to have two different types of cloth.
01:30:33.000 Do you understand why that exists?
01:30:34.000 I would assume the fabric law has to do with the people that were constructing the fabrics back then, that they had gang wars between silk and cotton.
01:30:42.000 No, kind of.
01:30:44.000 But what it was, a big reason for that, you have certain laws that were applicable to everyone, like the Ten Commandments.
01:30:49.000 And then you had laws that were designed to separate the Jewish people.
01:30:52.000 That's like a team jersey.
01:30:53.000 Because everyone else is doing this, so your beard's going to be this way.
01:30:56.000 Your fabric's going to be this way.
01:30:57.000 And so that's where brilliant theologians, far smarter than myself, will say, well, this is why these laws apply and these laws don't.
01:31:03.000 But my point is, I don't have a problem with, you know, like Tom Cruise.
01:31:06.000 I haven't stood up when he was like, he jumped on a couch.
01:31:08.000 I don't really care. 0.75
01:31:09.000 He's a little nutty, whatever. 0.96
01:31:11.000 What does that have to do with religion? 0.97
01:31:12.000 Well, Scientology.
01:31:13.000 Everyone was going, Scientology messed up his brain.
01:31:15.000 But jumping on the couch, did you think that had to do with anything?
01:31:17.000 Well, my point is, a lot of people said, you know, Scientology's messed him up.
01:31:19.000 I don't have a problem with Scientology.
01:31:21.000 I don't have a problem with Buddhism, Hinduism.
01:31:23.000 I don't. 0.99
01:31:23.000 There is one religion right now in this world, one religion where over 300 million people right now on Earth believe that you deserve to die if you leave the Islamic faith. 0.99
01:31:35.000 These are the people who will answer yes when you say, if someone converts from Islam, do they deserve to be executed? 1.00
01:31:40.000 Yes.
01:31:41.000 Over 300 million people in the world right now.
01:31:44.000 So when you say it's like this small minority, it's because you live this privileged life, ironically enough, in the United States, and you're not acknowledging the founder of the faith, what his callings were, and how every Islamically-run It's not the same thing. 0.92
01:31:59.000 It's not the same as any other religion. 0.97
01:32:01.000 And that's what I was pointing to. 0.99
01:32:02.000 You can find hypocrites. 1.00
01:32:03.000 You can find crazy Scientologists. 1.00
01:32:05.000 You can find crazy Christians. 1.00
01:32:06.000 But don't look to Christians. 1.00
01:32:07.000 Look to Christ.
01:32:07.000 And you may not like Christ.
01:32:09.000 You may think he's weird.
01:32:10.000 Don't look to Muslims because you have Muslim refugees now going into Germany, Syrian refugees who want welfare dollars for cigarettes. 1.00
01:32:16.000 That's not Muslim. 1.00
01:32:17.000 Look to Muhammad. 0.97
01:32:18.000 Muhammad did kill. 0.99
01:32:19.000 Muhammad did call for the deaths of Christians in Muhammad did screw a six, maybe nine-year-old girl. 0.96
01:32:24.000 He beat her, but only lightly so you couldn't see bruises. 0.94
01:32:27.000 If she was dressed up as a ninja, that's not hard to do. 1.00
01:32:29.000 These are different things, and people need to acknowledge it, and the left that labels me a racist, that labels you right-wing because you have a different opinion and you go off the reservation, All of a sudden just completely ignores that and sort of accepts it as cultural relativity. 0.99
01:32:43.000 Well, you don't really understand the reason a woman needs four witnesses when she's had the crap raped out of her. 0.98
01:32:49.000 We're going to ignore that and talk about some people here who are pro-life because their hands are on your uterus. 1.00
01:32:54.000 And that's what bothers me.
01:32:56.000 Well, I get bothered by any ideology that's rigid.
01:32:59.000 Anytime you have to subscribe to a bunch of rules, you have to fast during a certain time of the year, you have to wear a certain outfit, the women can't drive, they're not allowed to go to school. 1.00
01:33:10.000 Anytime you have really rigid ideologies, and then those ideologies, you find out that they're ancient and they're established by a warlord.
01:33:18.000 I mean, that is the difference between Christianity and Islam. 0.99
01:33:24.000 Jesus was supposed to be a man of peace, and Muhammad was supposed to be a warlord. 0.96
01:33:30.000 He held political office, he waged wars, he beheaded people, he did all those things.
01:33:33.000 It's a fundamental difference in the ideology, and it shows itself in the behavior of the people that are a part of the ideology.
01:33:41.000 In their minds, this is all...
01:33:44.000 It's all, like, guaranteed in Scripture.
01:33:47.000 It's all in their eyes.
01:33:48.000 What they're doing is all halal. 1.00
01:33:50.000 Everything is, you know.
01:33:52.000 Yeah, halal. 0.76
01:33:53.000 You know, it's one of those things.
01:33:54.000 It's also political ideology and legal prescription.
01:33:57.000 That's what people don't understand.
01:33:58.000 They go after Ben Carson and say he's a bigot. 0.96
01:34:00.000 So he's black, right? 0.99
01:34:01.000 All conservatives were racist. 0.99
01:34:02.000 And then when Clinton announced her nomination, all conservatives became sexist.
01:34:06.000 So with Ben Carson, well, he's not really racist.
01:34:08.000 Well, we'll say he's a bigot because he said he thought that...
01:34:21.000 I think that there are parts that are impossible to rectify with the Constitution, like You know, the treatment of women, the requirement of witnesses for a female rape, the subjugation of all non-Muslims, the dimitude and the poll taxes, which, of course, couldn't be allowed in the United States. 0.99
01:34:37.000 So I believe that we'd have to have a Muslim reject those precepts if they were going to be. 1.00
01:34:41.000 Oh, my God! 0.99
01:34:42.000 He's an anti-Muslim! 0.92
01:34:43.000 Like, that's a reasonable position.
01:34:44.000 It's a very reasonable position.
01:34:45.000 His gun thing was a reasonable thing about the Nazis. 0.85
01:34:48.000 Entirely reasonable.
01:34:50.000 The term Islamophobe, too, is a very disingenuous term.
01:34:54.000 Like, that term drives me nuts. 0.66
01:34:57.000 Like, if you criticize Islam, you're Islamophobic.
01:35:00.000 What is a phobia?
01:35:01.000 A phobia is a fear.
01:35:02.000 Are you fear of irrational religions?
01:35:03.000 Yes, I have a fear of those.
01:35:05.000 I'm also afraid of the Moonies.
01:35:06.000 I'm afraid of a lot of cults.
01:35:09.000 Yeah.
01:35:09.000 You know why?
01:35:10.000 Because I don't think anybody should be able to tell you how the fuck you should think.
01:35:13.000 I think the idea of having a government and having laws that are established by the people for the people that make sense, that give people equal freedom, that give people equal say, freedom of speech, freedom of religion, freedom to practice whatever you feel as long as it doesn't infringe upon the rights of other people, 0.89
01:35:29.000 I think all those things are great. 0.96
01:35:31.000 I think as soon as you have any sorts of ideologies that infringe upon those things, and the fact that progressive people, which is really weird, they'll shit on Christians all day long and have no problem with it, but they leave Islam alone. 0.98
01:35:45.000 And the reason why they leave Islam alone is because they don't want to get killed. 0.98
01:35:49.000 And that's the reality. 0.99
01:35:50.000 They're Islamophobic. 0.90
01:35:51.000 Exactly.
01:35:52.000 Well, that's the real Islamophobia, is the not criticizing it. 0.81
01:35:56.000 Criticizing it is not Islamophobia.
01:35:58.000 It's just a legitimate criticism. 0.98
01:36:00.000 It's a ridiculous idea. 1.00
01:36:01.000 They're all ridiculous. 0.99
01:36:02.000 I think any time you Buy into some rigid shit that was created way before people understood the world, way before people understood science, way before people understood the distance between the earth and the sun, the moon, the rotation of the earth. 0.99
01:36:17.000 I mean, think about all the shit that happened to Galileo when he tried to say that the earth wasn't the center of the universe. 0.98
01:36:22.000 Right. 0.99
01:36:22.000 I mean, that's all religion. 0.99
01:36:23.000 The Inquisition, it's all religion. 0.99
01:36:26.000 There's so many things that have been done, horrible things in the name of the ideology.
01:36:31.000 And just as much in the name of atheism, of course.
01:36:32.000 Michael Shermer had an interesting piece on the differences between Islam and other religions.
01:36:40.000 And it was all essentially saying that it was the one religion that didn't go through the Enlightenment.
01:36:46.000 That all these other religions, they sort of morphed and adapted to the new information.
01:36:53.000 You know, obviously some less than others, and obviously some... 0.99
01:36:56.000 I mean, when you see the fucking Pope dressed up like a wizard, you gotta go, well, obviously he's got some of that old crazy shit in his fucking war chest, but this Pope is Bernie Sanders in a funny hat. 0.99
01:37:09.000 He is, right? 1.00
01:37:10.000 He's an interesting one.
01:37:11.000 I think he's a faker. 0.95
01:37:14.000 I think what they did is they found some guy and they go, look, we're going to keep this thing rolling, right? 0.99
01:37:18.000 We like to have the gay bathhouse right above the Vatican. 0.92
01:37:22.000 They own the largest gay bathhouse in Europe. 0.97
01:37:25.000 You know that, right? 0.78
01:37:25.000 Do you know the whole story behind it? 0.78
01:37:26.000 I don't even know.
01:37:28.000 Let's talk about Islam.
01:37:29.000 I'm not Catholic.
01:37:30.000 Well, I am.
01:37:31.000 Well, I was raised Catholic.
01:37:32.000 Yeah, well, that's also very different, you know, and one thing that you're right.
01:37:35.000 I just don't want to create a moral equivalency.
01:37:37.000 I think we can agree that pragmatically, even if they have a gay bathhouse, it's not the same as hundreds of millions of people who want you and I blown up. 0.96
01:37:43.000 No, it's not. 0.79
01:37:44.000 I mean, I think there's a difference in Catholicism.
01:37:46.000 Like, first of all, there's no proselytizing.
01:37:50.000 They're trying to convert people.
01:37:52.000 They do, obviously, shield child molesters.
01:37:54.000 I mean, that was one of the reasons why the last pope had to step down.
01:37:58.000 I mean, that guy, the reason why the Vatican has so much power...
01:38:01.000 That's why Ratzinger had to step down?
01:38:02.000 Oh, yeah.
01:38:03.000 He's wanted for crimes against humanity.
01:38:05.000 They want to prosecute him for crimes against humanity.
01:38:08.000 That guy shielded child molesters to the point where one of the guys he shielded went on to molest 100-plus deaf children. 0.99
01:38:16.000 I mean, they fucking sent him. 0.99
01:38:18.000 They would take... 1.00
01:38:19.000 Didn't even hear him coming.
01:38:19.000 Oh, how dare you.
01:38:21.000 How dare you sneak that one in?
01:38:24.000 Sorry.
01:38:24.000 But he was one of those guys that actively shielded people from prostitution.
01:38:29.000 I have a problem with that, and I think people toss religion into the same thing as people of faith, and Islam doesn't allow any sort of practice of faith or relationship, whatever you want to call it, outside of their very specifically prescribed doctrine.
01:38:42.000 When you talk about specifically prescribed doctrines, how much of the Bible do you believe is real?
01:38:49.000 Do you want to get into each and every issue of the Bible?
01:38:51.000 Well, how about dudes coming back from the dead?
01:38:54.000 I'm not going to get into it.
01:38:55.000 Here's what I think.
01:38:56.000 Here's what I think, Joe.
01:38:58.000 To be fair, and this might take a real turn where you might get angry, but I hope you don't.
01:39:02.000 I doubt it.
01:39:03.000 It's intellectual aikido when you do that.
01:39:05.000 You need to have a Dinesh D'Souza on, or a Lawrence Tisdall on, because you can say these things.
01:39:09.000 I'm not equipped for it.
01:39:10.000 I'm a blue belt.
01:39:11.000 I've looked at the swath of evidence and have made up my mind.
01:39:15.000 But if you say this stuff is crazy, well, I've made my decision, and it's likely to change.
01:39:19.000 And I'm likely, my faith has changed.
01:39:20.000 Has it changed in the past?
01:39:22.000 Yeah, I think certain parts of my faith have changed.
01:39:24.000 But my point is, until you have someone on like that who's qualifying to do it, the same people who are going to be talking about, sorry, 9-11 being an inside job, or whatever it is, someone who's just as qualified.
01:39:34.000 Wait, wait, who's qualified to talk about 9-11 being an inside job?
01:39:36.000 Black helicopters!
01:39:37.000 Yeah, black helicopters.
01:39:39.000 I'm saying, until you have someone on like that...
01:39:40.000 Jet fuel doesn't melt!
01:39:41.000 Let me finish this point.
01:39:42.000 This is important.
01:39:43.000 Until you have someone on like that, you're doing a monkey fist and Joe Rogan baby monkey.
01:39:48.000 I would do that and do that with my opponent.
01:39:51.000 Kung fu guy. 0.93
01:39:51.000 You're doing that intellectually because you're not having someone who would be able to argue those points. 0.93
01:39:55.000 I'm not here to argue.
01:39:56.000 In all fairness, guess what?
01:39:58.000 I can't argue those points either.
01:39:59.000 If you have someone like that, I would have to bring on an actual religious scholar who's an atheist.
01:40:04.000 Yeah, but I mean, you know, you obviously have your, you push it, and you have every right to.
01:40:08.000 It's your program.
01:40:09.000 And you do as well.
01:40:10.000 If you go on and say that you're a Christian, and I say, well, what do you believe?
01:40:13.000 Yeah.
01:40:14.000 I think just between two gentlemen, that's a fair discussion.
01:40:17.000 Yeah, but it's no, there's no doubt that the way you approach it is certainly more aggressive than someone who's an atheist.
01:40:23.000 Than someone who is an atheist?
01:40:25.000 Yeah.
01:40:25.000 You give them more of a pass than someone who maybe claims to be a Christian.
01:40:28.000 But that's not even the main focus on what I talk about.
01:40:30.000 You know, guns, free speech. 0.77
01:40:31.000 I'm saying, okay, I got confused.
01:40:33.000 So you're saying, I give atheists more of a pass?
01:40:35.000 Yeah, you give them more leeway.
01:40:36.000 Oh.
01:40:37.000 And my point is...
01:40:37.000 Well, they don't believe in anything, but I do...
01:40:39.000 Sure they do.
01:40:40.000 Sure they do.
01:40:40.000 Millions and millions of people killed in the name of atheism.
01:40:43.000 Stalin, Mao...
01:40:44.000 No, no, no, no.
01:40:44.000 Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.
01:40:45.000 That's not what I mean.
01:40:46.000 No, but I'm talking about they do believe in ideology, a lot of them.
01:40:49.000 There is an atheist ideology, the New Atheism.
01:40:52.000 Okay, but the atheist ideology doesn't involve mysticism.
01:40:55.000 It's magic.
01:40:58.000 Right?
01:40:59.000 Some of it does.
01:41:00.000 What?
01:41:00.000 Like, what does?
01:41:01.000 When you have people who don't...
01:41:02.000 Well, let's use it this way, right?
01:41:03.000 Let's say I don't understand the Bible in its entirety.
01:41:05.000 I'm not a theologian. 0.97
01:41:07.000 Do you really think the people who are going to be right now going, this guy's a dumbass, understand the intricate science of the Big Bang? 0.96
01:41:14.000 Well, I don't think anybody understands the Big Bang. 0.99
01:41:16.000 No, they don't.
01:41:16.000 No one does.
01:41:17.000 Richard Dawkins doesn't understand it.
01:41:18.000 They're like, oh, I'm pretty sure something happened.
01:41:21.000 There's no mysticism to that?
01:41:23.000 Well, there's definitely.
01:41:24.000 I mean, Terrence McKenna had this brilliant thing about science, you know, and he was saying that science wants one miracle.
01:41:32.000 They want one miracle.
01:41:34.000 Give us one miracle and then we'll allow everything else.
01:41:38.000 We'll figure out.
01:41:39.000 We'll explain to you multi-celled organisms.
01:41:42.000 We'll explain to you carbon molecules.
01:41:44.000 What we want is one miracle.
01:41:45.000 How did life come from not life?
01:41:47.000 No, the Big Bang itself is the one miracle.
01:41:49.000 I mean, how did something come from nothing?
01:41:50.000 Well, not just something come from nothing.
01:41:52.000 How does something smaller than the head of the pin explode and become the entire universe?
01:41:57.000 How does something that has so much mass and is so fucking infinitely small, why does it explode?
01:42:03.000 Like, why does it explode? 0.76
01:42:04.000 Right.
01:42:05.000 No, even saying that the Big Bang existed, I've never heard someone adequately explain, maybe I'm wrong, but adequately explain why it happened.
01:42:14.000 Right.
01:42:14.000 I don't think they know.
01:42:15.000 Well, yes.
01:42:16.000 And my point is- Do they?
01:42:18.000 Does anybody know?
01:42:18.000 No.
01:42:19.000 Does anybody say they know?
01:42:20.000 Not that I know of.
01:42:21.000 I don't think they say they know.
01:42:22.000 And that's what Ben Carson argues about. 1.00
01:42:23.000 People go, he's a dumbass. 1.00
01:42:24.000 Like, well, he's a neurosurgeon. 0.99
01:42:25.000 Well, the Big Bang is one of the ones that I think you gotta go, well, I think they think that this happened because they have, you know, radio frequencies that they can discover and they can monitor and measure and we know...
01:42:39.000 Well, Dawkins' explanation, I mean, how do you say there's no mysticism that maybe these cells came on the back of crystals?
01:42:46.000 What is that?
01:42:47.000 Yeah, that's what he said in the movie with Ben Stein.
01:42:49.000 Well, maybe we think that maybe some of these molecules came in, you know, on the backs of foreign crystals.
01:42:54.000 Foreign crystals?
01:42:55.000 Yeah, crystals came in the Big Bang.
01:42:56.000 How do we get this life?
01:42:57.000 I mean, it was questioned on it.
01:42:58.000 I'm thinking, that sounds mystical to me.
01:43:00.000 I think at a certain point, something has taken on faith.
01:43:02.000 My point is this.
01:43:03.000 What we're arguing about is Islam, Christianity, all others.
01:43:06.000 We're talking pragmatically.
01:43:07.000 What's the effect?
01:43:08.000 What's the geopolitical effect?
01:43:09.000 What are the ramifications?
01:43:11.000 Mm-hmm.
01:43:11.000 I think it's really easy to simplify, and you want people in the comments section going, so you believe in zombie Jesus who, you know, didn't exist?
01:43:18.000 That's what I'm saying.
01:43:19.000 Yeah, it's just as easy for someone to say, so you, someone who's not a, not you, but you in your, you know, lounge chair with a box of Cheez-Its who has no concept of science.
01:43:29.000 Again, you're demeaning these poor people.
01:43:30.000 Has no concept of science whatsoever. 1.00
01:43:32.000 Jerking off into a sock. 0.98
01:43:34.000 Believes that a bang happened and all of a sudden Joe Rogan's drinking his fresh French press. 0.98
01:43:39.000 You can simplify anything and make it sound absurd.
01:43:41.000 And that's why I go back to I think they're smart people, smarter than me on both sides, and my mind is likely to change.
01:43:47.000 My mind is not likely to change in the Second Amendment.
01:43:49.000 My mind is not likely to change on free speech. 1.00
01:43:51.000 It's not likely to change in the fact that Mohammed was a bastard. 1.00
01:43:56.000 Well, I'm certainly with you on a lot of that. 0.97
01:43:59.000 I think that what they're talking about when they're talking about mystical occurrences during the time period of written history, which is what they're talking about when you're talking about the age of Jesus, these are like times where we do understand the parameters of actual possible Things that could have happened.
01:44:20.000 Sure.
01:44:20.000 You know, like people coming back from the dead.
01:44:22.000 We have no evidence ever that anybody's ever been able to come back from the dead.
01:44:26.000 I mean, it doesn't seem likely that that's true.
01:44:29.000 Yeah, but that's a whole different conversation. 1.00
01:44:30.000 Well, we also know that people are full of shit. 1.00
01:44:32.000 Is there a possibility of a miracle? 1.00
01:44:34.000 Which you require for the Big Bang, and I require for someone returning from the dead.
01:44:37.000 I don't necessarily think I require a miracle for the Big Bang.
01:44:40.000 I think there's missing science.
01:44:42.000 I think that there's...
01:44:43.000 Look, first of all...
01:44:44.000 And there's missing evidence from the...
01:44:45.000 You know, a good example, right?
01:44:46.000 This argument you're using right now.
01:44:47.000 Okay.
01:44:49.000 I'm not a theologian.
01:44:50.000 I'm not an apologist.
01:44:51.000 What argument?
01:44:51.000 But an argument that was used for a long time is kind of what you're saying.
01:44:54.000 There's no proof of this.
01:44:54.000 Well, for the longest time, people said, because David was this huge influential historical figure, right?
01:44:58.000 And they're going, well, David, up until 1993, they're going, this is a guy, this giant kingdom, right?
01:45:02.000 This is the guy.
01:45:03.000 There should be some historical evidence.
01:45:05.000 And there's none.
01:45:06.000 Until 1993, boom, more evidence than you could possibly imagine on David, his name on Marblestone.
01:45:11.000 Here is David.
01:45:11.000 Here is his kingdom.
01:45:12.000 As a historical figure, Now, nobody denies that he existed, and nobody denies that the lineage of the kings who were listed in the Old Testament existed when they claimed to exist.
01:45:21.000 Now, before that, the big argument was there would be some kind of proof of King David, and there isn't.
01:45:26.000 So, absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.
01:45:28.000 Yeah, the real issue with that argument is anytime you're dealing with things that are 2,000 years old plus, like, good luck finding anything.
01:45:35.000 Yeah, but we did.
01:45:36.000 Yeah, I mean, we find some things, but I'm arguing for you.
01:45:40.000 I'm saying that something doesn't exist because we haven't found evidence.
01:45:44.000 Boy, there's not a lot of evidence from 2,000 years ago.
01:45:47.000 Right. 0.97
01:45:47.000 I mean, that is a long fucking time. 0.97
01:45:50.000 And 2,000 years of erosion and water and natural disasters and all. 0.98
01:45:55.000 I mean, everything gets lost.
01:45:57.000 Well, you have a great bit on that.
01:45:58.000 And I actually had a bit similar that sucked.
01:46:00.000 And I axed it.
01:46:01.000 Because you said it better.
01:46:02.000 It was, if I send you into the forest, how long before you send me an email?
01:46:06.000 If I send you into the woods with a hatchet, how long you can send me anymore?
01:46:09.000 Sorry, I butchered it.
01:46:10.000 It's a great bit.
01:46:10.000 It simplifies it.
01:46:11.000 And I was like, I had a bit about going back to the witch trials and trying to explain to them germ theory in a microscope, and it just didn't work.
01:46:18.000 And I heard you do that, and I was like, all right, well, I'm just getting rid of that bit. 0.97
01:46:20.000 Well, my bit was about dumb people outbreeding smart people. 0.88
01:46:23.000 And by the way, this came out before that... 0.99
01:46:26.000 What is that movie about retards? 1.00
01:46:28.000 Yeah. 0.97
01:46:29.000 Idiocracy. 0.90
01:46:30.000 Idiocracy.
01:46:30.000 It came out, the bit was on TV before Idiocracy.
01:46:33.000 Okay, so people are like, you stole a bit.
01:46:35.000 Nope.
01:46:35.000 It was actually before that.
01:46:36.000 It's almost exactly like yours on Vegans and Milk.
01:46:39.000 Oh.
01:46:39.000 But I'm not axing it because I like it.
01:46:41.000 Keep it going.
01:46:43.000 Anything, I'm on your...
01:46:44.000 I have your permission? 1.00
01:46:44.000 I'll let you steal my shit. 1.00
01:46:45.000 It's already on TV. There's evidence of me doing it back to 08. Well, I was doing it before that. 0.99
01:46:50.000 Were you doing the vegan bit before 8?
01:46:51.000 Milk?
01:46:52.000 Yeah, it had to be formed.
01:46:54.000 It took a while.
01:46:56.000 Yeah, I have like a 25-minute vegan bit.
01:46:58.000 I put it on TV, I think, in 2013?
01:47:01.000 14?
01:47:02.000 It was in Colorado, Rocky Mountain.
01:47:03.000 Yeah, but I had ideas for that for a while.
01:47:06.000 The milk part was just one part of it. 0.97
01:47:08.000 The real part was about the won't shut the fuck up about being vegans. 0.98
01:47:12.000 But the thing about the idiocracy thing was about the pyramids. 1.00
01:47:18.000 It was about dumb people outbreeding smart people. 1.00
01:47:22.000 What would we do if one day no one fucked the smart people and we didn't even realize that they died off. 1.00
01:47:29.000 And then one day the power just shuts off. 0.97
01:47:31.000 And what do you do when the power shuts off?
01:47:32.000 I don't know what you do, but I just sit around and wait. 1.00
01:47:35.000 Because I figure, well, there's somebody fixing that shit. 0.99
01:47:37.000 But after a while, we'd be wandering through the streets like, who's fucking turning the power? 1.00
01:47:41.000 Is anybody? 0.95
01:47:41.000 Do you guys know? 0.95
01:47:42.000 Nothing?
01:47:42.000 You hear anything?
01:47:43.000 Fuck! 1.00
01:47:44.000 If this mic goes out, you're like, well, okay, there's a wire here, and it plugs in there, and that's about the extent of your knowledge. 1.00
01:47:50.000 There's very few people, because of the compartmentalization of our society, there's very few people, if any, that understand all of it, that understand the power That understand the water grid, that understand the purification of the water, that understand the government, that understand the computers, technology, the internet.
01:48:05.000 There's very few people that could recreate all the things.
01:48:09.000 And most of us rely on a bunch of other people that are experts in order to keep this insane machine that we call technology going. 0.99
01:48:17.000 So my theory on the pyramids was that dumb people outfuck the smart people. 0.99
01:48:22.000 And left behind this whole thing and then the dumb people would show up. 1.00
01:48:26.000 There was no one in the pyramid. 0.99
01:48:28.000 They're like, hello!
01:48:29.000 We're supposed to get our checks on Friday!
01:48:31.000 And there's nobody there.
01:48:33.000 I think somewhere there's some ethnocentricity down there that needs to be protested.
01:48:38.000 Well, there was the thing, the burning of the Library of Alexandria.
01:48:40.000 I mean, that really is kind of evidence of that.
01:48:42.000 That's what really would happen.
01:48:43.000 I mean, that's the other thing that people, like, a lot of black people or African Americans want to talk about, you know, the pyramids and that the pyramids were built by black people.
01:48:53.000 But they were built by Africans, for sure, because Egypt was Africa and it is in Africa. 0.99
01:48:58.000 Right.
01:48:59.000 The people from the South, like, there was blacker Africans that came in and killed the Egyptians that were there, and that's why the Sphinx has an African face, has an African-looking face, as opposed to you look at... 0.99
01:49:14.000 Define African face. 0.90
01:49:15.000 Wide nostrils, thick lips.
01:49:17.000 Yeah, don't you love with Sean King?
01:49:19.000 Yeah.
01:49:20.000 The pictures of him as a kid, strawberry blonde.
01:49:22.000 Do you see him?
01:49:22.000 Yes.
01:49:23.000 Like, strawberry blonde curls?
01:49:23.000 And every picture he takes, he's flaring his nostrils.
01:49:27.000 He's breathing in.
01:49:28.000 And, like, that is the most racist thing. 0.80
01:49:29.000 It's like, hold on, let me get a black-looking picture. 0.63
01:49:31.000 Do I look more black?
01:49:32.000 I'd do that. 0.98
01:49:33.000 You look kind of, like, gorilla-y.
01:49:36.000 What are you trying to say? 0.99
01:49:37.000 Black people look like gorillas? 1.00
01:49:38.000 No, you. 1.00
01:49:39.000 You son of a bitch. 1.00
01:49:40.000 I can't believe you. 1.00
01:49:41.000 Well, that's what just happened with Quentin Tarantino.
01:49:43.000 Did you see that?
01:49:44.000 Where he said these savage think pieces people wrote about me, and they go, he said savage. 0.99
01:49:49.000 He's calling black people savages. 0.98
01:49:50.000 And it's like... 0.97
01:49:51.000 That's the thing with these, you know, Quentin Tarantino is more leftist.
01:49:54.000 Same thing with Matt Damon.
01:49:55.000 I just love seeing these people are progressive and they like to separate from themselves and the social justice warrior cult.
01:50:02.000 It's the monster.
01:50:03.000 They've created it. 1.00
01:50:03.000 They deserve to be devoured. 1.00
01:50:04.000 Well, Amy Schumer got attacked.
01:50:06.000 She got attacked for some of the bits that she did on her show.
01:50:08.000 Well, she's up on stage pushing gun control with her third cousin twice removed. 0.99
01:50:12.000 I think she deserves it.
01:50:13.000 Well, you do realize that she had a movie that came out, and there was a mass shooting in the movie theater where her movie was being played. 1.00
01:50:20.000 I mean, that's got to fuck with your head. 1.00
01:50:22.000 Yeah, yeah, I'm sure. 1.00
01:50:23.000 Oh, they were playing train wreck while some guy opened fire.
01:50:25.000 Therefore, I'm directly responsible, and I'm going to remove your right to self-preservation.
01:50:29.000 I don't follow the logic trail.
01:50:30.000 Is she trying to remove your right?
01:50:32.000 I mean, what is she trying to say?
01:50:33.000 I don't know what she's saying.
01:50:34.000 She's actually pushing legislation with Chuck there in New York.
01:50:37.000 Chuck who?
01:50:38.000 Schumer.
01:50:38.000 Senator.
01:50:39.000 It's part of her...
01:50:40.000 Oh, that is one of her cousins?
01:50:41.000 Like, third removed.
01:50:43.000 When she's up on stage pushing that...
01:50:45.000 You know, I talk about it.
01:50:45.000 When you have Sarah Silverman saying it's time for comedians to get with the times, and when you have Harrison Greenbaum coming on saying, I'll support free speech, but I won't support hate speech.
01:50:54.000 You know, you have a lot of comedians who came out and said that...
01:50:57.000 What Nicole Arbor said was just wildly offensive and fat-shaming.
01:51:00.000 Nicole Arbor's the girl with the YouTube video.
01:51:02.000 Yeah, the fat-shaming thing.
01:51:03.000 See, that YouTube video, I just thought, wasn't well done.
01:51:06.000 And I thought when she went on The View, first of all, you're walking right into the lion's den.
01:51:10.000 A bunch of chubby broads on that show, you know? 1.00
01:51:13.000 They've come to Raven-Symoné now.
01:51:15.000 Well, what's really hilarious is one of their arguments was, you know, a lot of people just get addicted to certain foods.
01:51:20.000 I think that's what she's saying.
01:51:22.000 Well, yeah, Michelle Collins, comedian in there. 1.00
01:51:25.000 Joy Behar, comedian.
01:51:26.000 And they're giving her the rules on comedy. 1.00
01:51:30.000 Well, she didn't do a good job defending herself because she tried to do schtick. 1.00
01:51:34.000 No, no, no.
01:51:34.000 I'm more offended about my hair.
01:51:36.000 No, I'm not going to do that.
01:51:37.000 Michelle Collins and Joy Behar should absolutely feel ashamed for telling her.
01:51:41.000 Like, Joy Behar's going, you know, but listen, you're a skinny blonde, you know, whatever. 1.00
01:51:44.000 I make my jokes because I'm fat. 0.56
01:51:45.000 I first joke about myself.
01:51:47.000 You have to be...
01:51:47.000 So really, Joy Behar?
01:51:48.000 You're a Christian conservative?
01:51:49.000 Because that's who you make fun of all the time. 1.00
01:51:51.000 It's a stupid, stupid idea. 1.00
01:51:53.000 Now they're prescribing rules of comedy once they're offended. 1.00
01:51:56.000 And I won't go down that trail at all.
01:51:59.000 And I don't think Nicole Arbor's funny.
01:52:01.000 But that's what they're going to do.
01:52:02.000 They're going to attack you and say, I don't think you're funny, therefore you shouldn't say this.
01:52:06.000 They're not going to say.
01:52:07.000 I couldn't agree more in that way.
01:52:08.000 Yeah, and I think that what she did was kind of clunky.
01:52:11.000 But, you know, she's not, I don't think she's a real stand-up.
01:52:13.000 Yeah, she is.
01:52:14.000 Is she?
01:52:14.000 Yeah, from Canada.
01:52:15.000 She's not fantastic, but she's a stand-up.
01:52:16.000 Like I said, I don't think she's a real stand-up.
01:52:19.000 Now, listen.
01:52:20.000 You know what, though?
01:52:20.000 Think about it, though.
01:52:21.000 I really believe that you're kind of in America.
01:52:25.000 Canada?
01:52:25.000 Sort of.
01:52:26.000 It's North America.
01:52:27.000 Really?
01:52:27.000 Do you want to get it?
01:52:28.000 Sort of. 1.00
01:52:28.000 So I guess all those Canadians there on the shows in which you took part, they were idiots? 1.00
01:52:32.000 They weren't funny? 1.00
01:52:33.000 Listen, very funny guys, not stand-ups.
01:52:35.000 Yeah, but they're still comedians.
01:52:36.000 How about that?
01:52:37.000 Well, you know...
01:52:38.000 Comedian actually in French Canadian means actor, too.
01:52:41.000 I think I asked if they were stand-ups.
01:52:43.000 Oh, okay, stand-ups.
01:52:44.000 Well, she did do stand-ups. 1.00
01:52:44.000 Dave Foley's actually doing stand-up now. 1.00
01:52:46.000 At least he was for a while.
01:52:48.000 Last time I spoke to him, he's started doing stand-up to pay the bills.
01:52:51.000 He's got a horrible, horrible, horrible divorce story.
01:52:57.000 Dave Foley, if you go and Google the Dave Foley divorce story, I believe it's online in a YouTube clip that Brandon made. 0.99
01:53:05.000 It's fucking insane. 0.73
01:53:07.000 But my point is, let's go back. 0.98
01:53:09.000 This is important.
01:53:10.000 Okay.
01:53:10.000 Michelle Collins, Joy Behar, Sarah Silverman, Amy Schumer.
01:53:14.000 That should...
01:53:15.000 Just have your B.S. meter flinging on.
01:53:19.000 It should be firing so hot you're catching ghosts.
01:53:23.000 About this fat shaming thing?
01:53:24.000 No, not that, but when Sarah Silverman says it's not hard to get with the times.
01:53:27.000 When Amy Schumer pushes for gun control... 1.00
01:53:29.000 Well, what is Sarah Silverman saying that about?
01:53:31.000 About gun control?
01:53:32.000 No, she was saying that about comedy.
01:53:33.000 When she was asked about what is allowable and what's not, she's like, well, you know, I defend free speech, but yeah, it's not hard to get with the times.
01:53:41.000 Like, I used to say gay, and I don't think you should say that.
01:53:44.000 Like, that's gay? 1.00
01:53:46.000 Yeah. 0.52
01:53:46.000 But it's not about that's gay. 0.52
01:53:48.000 Mm-hmm.
01:53:49.000 It's about either it's all okay.
01:53:51.000 Jim Norton makes a great art.
01:53:52.000 People don't acknowledge how intelligent he is.
01:53:55.000 Oh, he's very intelligent.
01:53:56.000 I love Jim Norton.
01:53:57.000 It's either all okay or none of it's okay.
01:53:59.000 Well, I had a whole bit about this in my last special.
01:54:02.000 You probably saw like the whole thing about not being able to joke about things.
01:54:07.000 Right.
01:54:07.000 You know, and I'm saying when I say things on stage, when I'm joking, I do not mean them.
01:54:13.000 I say a bunch of crazy shit, and the reason I say that crazy shit is because it's funny. 0.99
01:54:18.000 And if it's not funny, I wouldn't say it. 0.99
01:54:20.000 But there's some things that I say that are absolutely not true.
01:54:25.000 And I say them just because they're funny.
01:54:27.000 But there's some things that are true.
01:54:28.000 Like, here's one. 1.00
01:54:29.000 My wife is tired of fucking me. 1.00
01:54:31.000 I go, but she's still... 1.00
01:54:32.000 It's true. 1.00
01:54:34.000 But she doesn't say no, because if she did it, I'd rape her. 0.99
01:54:38.000 See, that's not true. 0.99
01:54:39.000 I joke around. 0.70
01:54:40.000 I go, I wouldn't rape her. 1.00
01:54:41.000 The worst I do is hold her down, titty fuck her butt cheeks. 1.00
01:54:43.000 That's not true either. 1.00
01:54:44.000 I wouldn't do that either.
01:54:45.000 And it's like this whole series of things, it gets more and more preposterous.
01:54:48.000 I go, I'm joking.
01:54:49.000 Do you get it?
01:54:50.000 You see how it's going on here?
01:54:51.000 I'm not raping anybody.
01:54:52.000 She's like one of my favorite people.
01:54:54.000 I wouldn't rape- and then I'd say the rest of it.
01:54:56.000 But it's like the idea is- Do you know a thing of feminism? 1.00
01:54:59.000 Stand-up is not truth.
01:55:02.000 It is sometimes truth.
01:55:03.000 Right.
01:55:04.000 But it is what is funny.
01:55:05.000 Well, just like Marilyn Manson. 0.99
01:55:07.000 And I assume that you know I'm fucking around. 0.99
01:55:08.000 Right. 0.99
01:55:09.000 No, you can't anymore.
01:55:10.000 And here's the thing.
01:55:11.000 The progressive left, sorry, like Silverman's, the Schumer's, the Harrison Greenbaum's, the Joy Behar's, the Michelle Collins.
01:55:17.000 Why are you apologizing?
01:55:17.000 Why are you saying sorry and then doing it?
01:55:18.000 Well, I'm saying sorry these names because I know they're probably your friends.
01:55:21.000 Well, Amy's my friend and Sarah's my friend.
01:55:23.000 Yeah, and I really enjoyed their...
01:55:25.000 I mean, I was a kid when they were doing stand-up, you know?
01:55:27.000 I think Sarah's one of the best comics on the planet.
01:55:30.000 I really do.
01:55:30.000 But she was a shock.
01:55:31.000 Of course, that was a big part of her act. 0.99
01:55:34.000 Yes, it still is.
01:55:34.000 And now she's saying it's not hard to get with the time.
01:55:36.000 So really what she's saying is you can joke about this, but don't joke about this.
01:55:40.000 And it's sort of like the wealthy 1% protecting their wealth.
01:55:44.000 A lot of these established comedians now say, well, what applies to you didn't apply to me.
01:55:48.000 And that's something a lot of these kids now, you're going to see it migrate.
01:55:51.000 The people who are the real free speech warriors, like the Sargons of a cat, like the Karen Strawns.
01:55:56.000 Maybe they're not All comedians, but they're going to be online because stand-up is not the environment that you came up in.
01:56:02.000 You may be able to say what you want to say, but let me paint a picture for you.
01:56:05.000 Okay.
01:56:05.000 Because you're super wealthy and you're successful and I'm not worthy.
01:56:08.000 But I'm talking about the kid who's coming up in, I don't know, Omaha, Nebraska, or maybe even here at the Laugh Factory, open mic night.
01:56:15.000 Don't do the Laugh Factory open mic night. 0.60
01:56:17.000 They make you stay in line all fucking day and then you come back a week later. 1.00
01:56:20.000 It's bullshit. 1.00
01:56:21.000 The point is, that kid gets up and makes a tranny joke, right? 1.00
01:56:24.000 Someone complains and threatens with a lawsuit.
01:56:27.000 Maybe the booker isn't a social justice warrior, but you think he's going to say, you know what, let's just book another comic.
01:56:31.000 I'm not going to take that risk.
01:56:32.000 That's what happens.
01:56:34.000 And for me to see comedians supporting it, I think you're seeing sort of a passing of the guard with stand-up to a lot of these truth-tellers online because they're not beholden to those rules.
01:56:44.000 Right.
01:56:44.000 I see what you're saying.
01:56:45.000 I don't know what Sarah meant when she said that.
01:56:48.000 I don't know what context she said it in.
01:56:50.000 That's fair.
01:56:50.000 But when you say that she's a shock comic, most of her shocking stuff was kind of self-deprecating.
01:56:56.000 Like, most of her shock...
01:56:57.000 I mean, she wasn't attacking people.
01:56:59.000 Well, Jesus' magic was...
01:57:00.000 If you look at it, there was a lot of stuff that was designed to prod Christians, which is fine. 1.00
01:57:04.000 It's funny.
01:57:04.000 But Christians don't try and kill you.
01:57:07.000 Right.
01:57:08.000 I see what you're saying.
01:57:09.000 I haven't seen her deal with Islam. 0.99
01:57:10.000 I had a CD called Shiny Happy Jihad.
01:57:11.000 I saw that.
01:57:12.000 Yeah.
01:57:13.000 Yeah, it was good.
01:57:15.000 It was a little risky.
01:57:17.000 It was a little risky, but it wasn't risky like what you did.
01:57:19.000 What you did in YouTube, that was way more risky.
01:57:22.000 Oh, thank you, Joe.
01:57:23.000 Yeah, mine was just jokes about, like, suicide bombers.
01:57:26.000 But mine jokes were, like, you know, that I don't understand suicide bombing because I was raised Catholic.
01:57:32.000 Like, no Catholics believe in it that much.
01:57:35.000 Right.
01:57:35.000 Like, there's never going to be a Catholic suicide bomber because we just don't believe in it that much.
01:57:39.000 Well, I'm incredibly critical of Catholicism, you know, being raised in Quebec.
01:57:42.000 People don't understand that in the United States, first off, all the rights you're talking about, ironically, when you're saying you don't want a rigid religion, those rights come from people who said they came from God.
01:57:50.000 It doesn't come from man.
01:57:51.000 It doesn't come from law.
01:57:52.000 So that is a part of our laws here.
01:57:53.000 Well, it also came from people that didn't have the internet.
01:57:56.000 They were writing things down with feathers.
01:57:58.000 No, but I'm talking about where they come from.
01:57:58.000 That was very unique.
01:57:59.000 This was the first society that said, okay, these rights don't come from us.
01:58:03.000 They come from God.
01:58:04.000 That was why freedom of speech exists here.
01:58:07.000 Right.
01:58:07.000 But it's also the first society to establish itself, the difference between church and state.
01:58:11.000 Yes.
01:58:11.000 No, exactly.
01:58:12.000 And if you read the, you know, like, for example, the separation of church and state doesn't exist.
01:58:16.000 It's not in the Constitution.
01:58:18.000 It's written from a, taken from a private letter from Thomas Jefferson to the Danbury Baptist, where he was talking about no establishment of a state denomination because they were afraid of a certain denomination taken over.
01:58:28.000 Fast forward Quebec, where I was raised, I went to public school.
01:58:31.000 I went to Catholic school.
01:58:33.000 Catholicism is the provincial denomination in Quebec.
01:58:36.000 The United States didn't want that, and a big portion of it is if you look in Europe and you look in Canada where Catholicism was so overbearing, and you have these beautiful cathedrals in Montreal that are entirely empty. 0.97
01:58:46.000 People reject the oppressive thumb of religion, and that's why more Christians exist in the United States, not because they're stupid and they're bumpkins, but because they didn't have the oppressive religion, so they didn't reject it as readily. 0.97
01:58:59.000 I see. 0.99
01:59:00.000 That makes sense?
01:59:01.000 Yeah, so your public school was a religious school.
01:59:05.000 Yeah, it was.
01:59:05.000 And I was not a Catholic.
01:59:07.000 I got sent home quite a few times for arguing with the teachers.
01:59:10.000 What did you argue about?
01:59:12.000 Well, I bitched when I wasn't allowed to take communion because I had taken communion with my parents for a long time.
01:59:17.000 And my dad was like, do you understand what this is?
01:59:19.000 Yeah, I understand.
01:59:19.000 He goes, okay, explain it to me.
01:59:20.000 Okay, fine, you can take the bread from the basket.
01:59:21.000 But in a Catholic church, you can't do it.
01:59:23.000 It's a whole ceremony.
01:59:25.000 Why couldn't you?
01:59:26.000 Because I wasn't Catholic.
01:59:27.000 Because you didn't get baptized.
01:59:29.000 I mean, you didn't go through a catechism.
01:59:32.000 Right, all that.
01:59:32.000 And then I also had one, and this will sound really silly to the atheist audience who aren't Christians, so I'll get off it.
01:59:38.000 But the teacher was talking about, what's a saint, kids?
01:59:40.000 And my school was St. Francis of Assisi.
01:59:42.000 And my parents were always really clear.
01:59:43.000 Like, I had a dad who gave me the sex talk when I was three.
01:59:45.000 He gave me sort of... 1.00
01:59:48.000 Damn. 0.99
01:59:48.000 I got a call home in preschool. 0.99
01:59:50.000 My dad sounds like a Home Alone crook.
01:59:57.000 It's like, no, that's like Tom Rivera's joke. 0.83
01:59:59.000 Yeah.
02:00:00.000 Well, he didn't want me to learn about it in school and think it was dirty.
02:00:02.000 Oh, okay.
02:00:03.000 So I got it really young.
02:00:04.000 And I actually, in preschool, Catholic school, they were talking about, what's funny, her name was Miss Mary.
02:00:09.000 And her daughter was in my class, Monica.
02:00:12.000 And so she was giving us the whole, like, stork business.
02:00:14.000 And this is in preschool.
02:00:15.000 Like, I'm four or five.
02:00:16.000 And I go, no, that's not.
02:00:18.000 Let me break it down for you.
02:00:18.000 That's not how it works.
02:00:20.000 And then her daughter was in class.
02:00:24.000 So whatever lie she tells at home, she has to keep a lie for the class because her daughter's there.
02:00:27.000 Right.
02:00:27.000 So her daughter's like, there's no egg.
02:00:29.000 It's a tin can and a tummy and a baby growth and a tin can. 0.99
02:00:32.000 And at this point, I'm going like, well, my dad told me, you know, penis, vagina, egg sale, fertilization, you know. 0.99
02:00:37.000 How old were you? 0.99
02:00:38.000 I would have been four.
02:00:39.000 So four, she's talking about tin cans?
02:00:41.000 She's talking about tin cans.
02:00:42.000 And I go up to the teacher.
02:00:44.000 I'm like, well, you know, Monica's saying it's a tin can.
02:00:46.000 Tell her it's an egg.
02:00:46.000 She goes, Stephen, it's a tin can, like a pecan.
02:00:48.000 Oh, what a bitch. 1.00
02:00:49.000 And I go home. 1.00
02:00:50.000 Lying to your kid, lying to me. 0.83
02:00:52.000 Well, I go home and I'm harassing my dad. 0.99
02:00:53.000 I go, Dad, is there like a can in a woman's stomach? 1.00
02:00:56.000 And this is just who my dad is.
02:00:57.000 He never baby talked to us. 1.00
02:00:58.000 He just goes, no, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life. 1.00
02:01:00.000 I wouldn't lie to you. 1.00
02:01:01.000 And that was it.
02:01:03.000 Wow.
02:01:03.000 So I knew that stuff.
02:01:04.000 So you got in trouble for that?
02:01:06.000 Well, yeah, because she had to keep the life for her daughter.
02:01:08.000 But, like, what kind of trouble?
02:01:09.000 Did they kick you off?
02:01:10.000 Well, they called home, like, Stephen's being inappropriate.
02:01:12.000 Wow. 1.00
02:01:13.000 If that was my fucking kid, if I went to school and this dumb cunt is trying to tell my kid that there's a tin can growing inside some woman's uterus... 1.00
02:01:22.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00
02:01:23.000 Well, my dad did.
02:01:24.000 My dad went in and we had a teacher, well, I'll say her name because I can't stand her, Mrs. Lake. 1.00
02:01:28.000 She kicked me out of class, Mrs. Lake. 0.99
02:01:30.000 You know why she kicked me out of class? 0.99
02:01:32.000 Why?
02:01:32.000 Because I said there were 50 states.
02:01:34.000 She argued there were 52. What were the other two?
02:01:38.000 Alaska and Hawaii.
02:01:39.000 But that's 48 and the lower 48. You don't have to tell me, Joe!
02:01:43.000 You don't have to tell me! 0.89
02:01:44.000 Well, didn't Obama fuck that up? 0.60
02:01:45.000 He said 57. I think Obama fucked that up. 0.92
02:01:47.000 57. Did he say 57? 0.86
02:01:48.000 Yeah.
02:01:49.000 I thought he said 52 as well.
02:01:50.000 No, I said 57. I mean, it's a word slip.
02:01:53.000 He was probably really tired, too.
02:01:54.000 Yeah, it's a word slip. 0.98
02:01:54.000 When he was running for president, you might not know how fucking tired that guy must have been. 0.98
02:01:57.000 It was when he was running, right? 0.97
02:01:59.000 Yeah, wasn't it?
02:01:59.000 Especially with how much he drinks.
02:02:00.000 Does he drink a lot?
02:02:01.000 Yeah, it was his annual physical that came back like, oh, you're mostly good, just stop drinking so much.
02:02:05.000 Really?
02:02:06.000 How do you know this?
02:02:07.000 Well, it was released.
02:02:08.000 Yeah, people talked about his annual physical.
02:02:09.000 Did you ever see George Bush's physical?
02:02:11.000 No.
02:02:11.000 You may not like him, but you never saw it?
02:02:12.000 He was running marathons.
02:02:14.000 His last year of his presidency benched 205 for five reps.
02:02:18.000 That's pretty good.
02:02:18.000 For an old dude.
02:02:19.000 That's not bad.
02:02:20.000 He's got that, like, chimpanzee wiry strength, you know what I mean?
02:02:23.000 Like that old Charles Bronson deal. 0.91
02:02:24.000 Yeah, well, he does a lot of really shitty paintings, too.
02:02:27.000 You ever see his artwork? 0.54
02:02:28.000 You've never seen his artwork?
02:02:30.000 I haven't, no.
02:02:31.000 Oh, it's really horrendously bad.
02:02:33.000 Perfect segue.
02:02:33.000 Yeah, that's right.
02:02:34.000 Want to bring up Lena Dunham's dad's paintings?
02:02:35.000 Yeah, well, I want to also bring up why we keep bringing her up.
02:02:39.000 You had a really good video that I saw. 0.97
02:02:41.000 Because she sucks, that's why we're bringing her up. 0.99
02:02:42.000 How dare you? 1.00
02:02:43.000 I don't know her.
02:02:45.000 I don't know you, Lena.
02:02:46.000 I'm sure you're a very nice person.
02:02:47.000 She's not.
02:02:48.000 But the video was very interesting because you were talking about this whole story where she had come up with this book, and in the book she was talking about a time that she was raped.
02:03:01.000 But you highlighted her actual words that when she was with this guy, she started talking dirty to him. 0.99
02:03:08.000 This is before they even had sex.
02:03:10.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:03:10.000 She started talking dirty and asking him if he wanted to do this and he wanted to do that and then he did those things and then her friends are saying, oh my god, you got raped. 0.99
02:03:20.000 I was raped? 0.99
02:03:21.000 Really? 1.00
02:03:22.000 What kind of a fucking world are we living in that people are talking about that and not highlighting the ambiguity of talking dirty to somebody, not highlighting the mixed signals and you went over that, I thought, 0.99
02:03:37.000 very respectfully. 0.99
02:03:38.000 I thought you did it very- Oh, and I failed.
02:03:40.000 It wasn't meant to be respectful at all.
02:03:41.000 Well, you were honest about it.
02:03:43.000 You weren't insulting.
02:03:45.000 Oh, I was insulting.
02:03:45.000 I dressed up like Lena Dunham.
02:03:47.000 Yeah?
02:03:49.000 That's trans face now. 1.00
02:03:50.000 But if you dress up like me, if you're a girl and you wear this fucking shirt, am I going to be insulted? 1.00
02:03:56.000 I don't know. 0.99
02:03:57.000 That's not insulting to me.
02:03:58.000 If you dress like me, I'm not going to get insulted.
02:04:01.000 If I'm ever invited back, I'll come in like you.
02:04:01.000 Well, you would be a guy dressing like a guy.
02:04:04.000 But I'm saying if you were a girl and you dressed like me, would I be like, that insulting bitch! 1.00
02:04:08.000 Like, why would that be insulting? 1.00
02:04:10.000 I don't understand that.
02:04:11.000 Well, because I mocked her. 0.99
02:04:12.000 Well, you mocked what she said, and you also mocked it because it was being paraded around as if it made sense. 0.98
02:04:19.000 And it's fucking confusing. 0.98
02:04:21.000 Well, that's the whole problem. 0.99
02:04:22.000 There's you.
02:04:27.000 Are you wearing a wig?
02:04:29.000 Yeah, it's a Bieber wig.
02:04:31.000 She's changed her hair so many times, she has a little Lord Faunal Ray haircut.
02:04:36.000 Yeah, I guess this is old.
02:04:39.000 Yeah, I was pretty mocking.
02:04:39.000 No, that's an old one.
02:04:41.000 You did more than one.
02:04:42.000 This is a parody one.
02:04:44.000 The other one, you weren't dressed like that.
02:04:46.000 No, I was.
02:04:47.000 I have my standard Lena Dunham outfit.
02:04:49.000 My point is, the media doesn't call her on it.
02:04:52.000 And so, and this is where I talk about, we all have blind spots.
02:04:54.000 Well, not only did they not talk, they didn't call her on it, they didn't make her explain how, like, this is a, like, if you could, tell the story, because a lot of people probably don't know what we're even talking about.
02:05:10.000 Tell the story that is in her book.
02:05:12.000 Um...
02:05:13.000 So Lena Dunham claims she was raped in her book. 1.00
02:05:15.000 She claims she was raped by a mustachioed Republican. 0.98
02:05:18.000 She codenamed him Barry. 0.95
02:05:19.000 She said it was a night where muscle relaxers, Xanax and alcohol took him back to her place.
02:05:24.000 She was peeing in a parking lot and he stuck his fingers in her nether regions. 1.00
02:05:27.000 And then she got home and she wasn't sure how she felt about it. 0.91
02:05:31.000 And she went ahead with it, talked dirty to him. 1.00
02:05:33.000 Then I think while they were finishing up, she saw a condom in the house plant and realized he had taken off a condom. 0.98
02:05:38.000 And then the next morning, her friends told her she had been raped. 0.55
02:05:40.000 So everyone runs with this and they hold her out as this rape survivor. 0.97
02:05:44.000 And here's the thing.
02:05:45.000 It's not that hard to track down the guy she's talking about.
02:05:47.000 I'm not a journalist.
02:05:49.000 It took about three or four phone calls.
02:05:51.000 And I won't get into that.
02:05:52.000 I really don't want to get into that because the guy obviously, you know, can destroy his life. 0.72
02:05:55.000 He's accused of raping someone who has a wife and kids.
02:05:59.000 Here's the thing, too. 0.84
02:05:59.000 He wasn't a Republican either, right? 0.84
02:06:02.000 Again, I don't want to get into the personal stuff.
02:06:05.000 No need to.
02:06:06.000 Because I don't want to destroy his life.
02:06:08.000 People say rape destroys your life. 0.54
02:06:09.000 It does.
02:06:10.000 But falsely accusing a guy of rape is incredibly destructive as well.
02:06:14.000 And they don't have any recourse.
02:06:15.000 The legal system is entirely designed to prosecute.
02:06:18.000 End of story.
02:06:19.000 Same thing if you want to get custody of your kids.
02:06:21.000 So no one called her on it.
02:06:23.000 And that's what I did the video on.
02:06:25.000 That if this is a huge disservice to rape victims, to women who are I will tell you this.
02:06:33.000 I don't believe that statistic.
02:06:34.000 In the general population, it's far less.
02:06:36.000 But at, like, feminist film festivals, I think four out of three women are raped. 1.00
02:06:39.000 Everyone there claims to have been raped. 0.53
02:06:41.000 And you'd think, you know, the more attractive you are, the chances of being raped would go up, right? 0.86
02:06:47.000 I'm not robbing family dollar. 0.94
02:06:48.000 I'm going to go for the jeweler. 1.00
02:06:49.000 But apparently there's just an epidemic of purple-pitted, fatty, androgynous, ambiguous feminists just getting raped by roaming packs. 1.00
02:06:58.000 That's what they want us to believe. 1.00
02:06:59.000 Well, it depends on how you define rape, because regret is rape.
02:07:03.000 All regretful PNV, what they teach in college. 0.94
02:07:07.000 PNV? Penis and vagina. 1.00
02:07:08.000 Regretful penis and vagina is rape. 1.00
02:07:10.000 Yeah, that one is a really weird one to me. 0.99
02:07:13.000 I talked to Thaddeus Russell on the podcast about Occidental College, where they had that case where...
02:07:19.000 These two kids got drunk, and they had sex, and the girl was saying to her friends, I'm about to get laid, lol. 0.98
02:07:26.000 You know, are you coming over? 0.90
02:07:27.000 Do you have condoms?
02:07:28.000 Texting this guy. 0.99
02:07:29.000 Guy comes over, they have sex. 0.66
02:07:31.000 Afterwards, she decides, someone decides that it was rape because she was intoxicated. 0.64
02:07:38.000 Completely ignoring the fact that he was intoxicated as well.
02:07:41.000 They were both drunk kids that had sex. 0.95
02:07:44.000 And you know what, man? 0.88
02:07:45.000 When I was young, that's what it was.
02:07:47.000 It was drunk people had sex.
02:07:49.000 And nobody felt like they got raped because they were drunk. 1.00
02:07:51.000 My wife rapes me on the regular. 0.96
02:07:53.000 People make mistakes. 1.00
02:07:55.000 I've had sex with people.
02:07:57.000 After it was over, I was like, I probably shouldn't drink so much.
02:07:59.000 We've all been there before.
02:08:01.000 You went hawking?
02:08:02.000 We've all been there before!
02:08:04.000 Everybody who drinks and is young, and especially when you're young, you don't really know how to drink well, you don't have a large database of things to pull back from. 0.98
02:08:14.000 Like, okay, I've been down this road before, the third shot of Jack is where shit goes downhill. 0.98
02:08:19.000 Right. 0.99
02:08:19.000 That's when the purple-haired 5x5 feminist starts looking pretty good. 0.99
02:08:23.000 People make mistakes, man. 0.97
02:08:25.000 And you can't say that it's a fucking crime because you both engage in a consensual activity, but you don't like it after it was over. 0.95
02:08:32.000 It doesn't matter. 0.97
02:08:33.000 But my point was that kid, the boy, got kicked out of the college.
02:08:37.000 The girl stayed. 0.83
02:08:38.000 They were both exactly They both participated.
02:08:42.000 They both were agreeable.
02:08:44.000 I mean, she asked him, come over.
02:08:47.000 Do you have condoms?
02:08:48.000 He said, I'm on my way.
02:08:49.000 They got together. 0.97
02:08:50.000 They had sex. 0.99
02:08:50.000 And because there was alcohol involved, the girl was raped. 0.99
02:08:54.000 Which is insane. 0.98
02:08:55.000 Well, mattress girl. 0.97
02:08:56.000 Another one.
02:08:58.000 Almost invariably, these cases come up, and they're just lies.
02:09:01.000 They're just false.
02:09:02.000 Well, the Rolling Stones story.
02:09:03.000 Yeah, the Rolling Stones story. 0.63
02:09:05.000 But Lena Dunham is so bad, because then she's holding herself out as this rape survivor. 1.00
02:09:09.000 And she's molested her little sister, and she's just a bad human being. 1.00
02:09:13.000 And you can bring up her dad's paintings, Carol Dunham. 0.94
02:09:15.000 I mean, there's some weird stuff.
02:09:17.000 His name's Carol?
02:09:18.000 Yeah, Carol.
02:09:18.000 Can we bring that up?
02:09:19.000 Her dad's named Carol?
02:09:20.000 Can we do this?
02:09:21.000 Are dudes named Carol?
02:09:23.000 Carol Shelby.
02:09:26.000 That's all he drew.
02:09:27.000 Wait a minute. 1.00
02:09:28.000 What the fuck is that? 1.00
02:09:29.000 That's her dad's painting. 1.00
02:09:31.000 Oh my god. 1.00
02:09:31.000 Her dad's got a painting of a woman, her ass? 1.00
02:09:35.000 No, no, not A. That's all he drew. 1.00
02:09:37.000 That was his thing. 1.00
02:09:38.000 Just a woman from behind, asses and vaginas. 1.00
02:09:41.000 Angry vaginas. 1.00
02:09:42.000 In this weird cart. 1.00
02:09:43.000 Yeah, they're like baboon asses. 1.00
02:09:45.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:09:46.000 Now, you don't think some weird stuff went on in that household?
02:09:49.000 Whoa! 0.71
02:09:49.000 And this is the girl... 0.71
02:09:50.000 I mean, she...
02:09:51.000 What did she do to her sister? 0.99
02:09:53.000 There was something that she admitted that she'd done. 1.00
02:09:55.000 Something like she reached in with her fingers, she said, because her sister put pebbles in her vagina. 1.00
02:09:58.000 And she also said she would, like... 1.00
02:10:00.000 She acted like a predator where she would try and lure her sister, like pay her to kiss her. 1.00
02:10:05.000 And she masturbated in bed next to her little sister. 1.00
02:10:09.000 What the fuck are these drawings? 1.00
02:10:12.000 Yeah! 1.00
02:10:13.000 You want to tell me this is a healthy, balanced individual?
02:10:15.000 Come on.
02:10:16.000 Like, let's just add up, you can't guarantee it, but add up the pieces to the puzzle.
02:10:19.000 And she's the feminist. 1.00
02:10:22.000 She's the new Barbra Streisand, right?
02:10:23.000 She's out there.
02:10:24.000 And my issue was the media didn't call her on her.
02:10:27.000 Front page HuffPo, CNN, MSNBC, Lena Dunham bravely comes out about being a rape survivor. 0.99
02:10:32.000 And when I see leftists going, the corporate media man, and they're buying Lena Dunham wholesale, that's what bothers me.
02:10:39.000 Look at that one! 0.96
02:10:39.000 That's just disgusting. 0.96
02:10:41.000 These pictures are fucking strange. 0.99
02:10:43.000 You know, have you ever seen Jack Kevorkian's drawings? 0.98
02:10:46.000 I saw, yeah, some of them. 0.99
02:10:48.000 Yeah, like, what the fuck, dude? 0.99
02:10:49.000 This is kind of along those lines. 1.00
02:10:51.000 Along those lines, where it's like, okay.
02:10:53.000 I mean, I'm a big fan of artistic freedom. 0.92
02:10:55.000 You should be able to do whatever the fuck you want, but can we not show this on YouTube?
02:10:59.000 Is that why you're not putting it up online? 0.95
02:11:01.000 Oh, okay.
02:11:02.000 People are gonna have to say they're over 18. Well, it just seems to me like, God damn it, man. 0.99
02:11:07.000 This is really weird shit. 1.00
02:11:09.000 So she's raising that. 0.99
02:11:10.000 It's objectification, too.
02:11:12.000 I mean, this isn't just a beautiful woman. 0.56
02:11:14.000 There's no face. 1.00
02:11:14.000 It's just an angry vagina. 1.00
02:11:15.000 That's what I'm saying. 1.00
02:11:16.000 And a butthole. 1.00
02:11:16.000 Well, they're all buttholes and angry vaginas. 1.00
02:11:18.000 And when you do get a head-on view, Jamie, click on the one above, the head-on view. 0.99
02:11:22.000 You don't see the face.
02:11:23.000 Look at that girl that, like, in the middle there on that... 1.00
02:11:27.000 Yeah, right there.
02:11:27.000 That looks like something from the ring.
02:11:29.000 Exactly.
02:11:30.000 It's creepy. 1.00
02:11:30.000 What the fuck is going on with her nipples? 1.00
02:11:32.000 First of all, she looks like she's dead and drowning, right? 1.00
02:11:35.000 Or she's drowned and now she's pale and white.
02:11:37.000 That looks like a drowning victim. 0.84
02:11:39.000 Like, her legs are underwater.
02:11:40.000 He would claim it's pointing out the irony or the...
02:11:43.000 I don't know. 0.99
02:11:44.000 It's just so silly and patriarchy. 0.94
02:11:46.000 So that's my point is she's emblematic of everything that's wrong with social justice warrior culture. 1.00
02:11:50.000 And her show just sucks. 1.00
02:11:52.000 She's unfunny. 1.00
02:11:53.000 What show is that?
02:11:53.000 Girls on HBO. I've never seen it.
02:11:55.000 Well, you know what's the perfect example, right?
02:11:56.000 You hear about it everywhere.
02:11:57.000 All these Emmys, they're lucky to get 600,000 viewers on Girls.
02:12:01.000 The ratings are terrible, but HBO wants to push it because they believe the messaging is important.
02:12:05.000 What's the messaging?
02:12:07.000 It's all the feminist, leftist, tolerant BS that Lena Dunham pushes. 1.00
02:12:11.000 They've decided Lena Dunham is important enough that they're going to prop her up, despite the fact that an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm or Game of Thrones can get ten times the viewership, but it's important for the rape survivor to have a show, and it's not true.
02:12:23.000 Is that really why you think they do it?
02:12:26.000 It's a for-profit enterprise.
02:12:27.000 Why would they do it otherwise?
02:12:28.000 Well, don't you think they think they do it because it balances out their programming or makes them seem more erudite?
02:12:35.000 Balances it out from what?
02:12:36.000 HBO is always to the left.
02:12:38.000 No one thinks Game of Thrones isn't to the left.
02:12:41.000 Game of Thrones is inconsequential.
02:12:42.000 It's the kind of kids who will argue. 0.98
02:12:44.000 It's fucking awesome. 0.99
02:12:45.000 First of all, watch your tongue, sir. 0.99
02:12:47.000 I'm not a big fan.
02:12:48.000 How dare you?
02:12:49.000 I'm not a big fan.
02:12:50.000 My friend Natasha Leggero, she calls it make-em-ups. 0.99
02:12:53.000 She doesn't like any fiction.
02:12:55.000 She's like, I don't like make-em-ups. 0.99
02:12:57.000 Because they just make shit up. 0.99
02:12:58.000 Like, oh, all of a sudden she gave birth to dragons. 0.99
02:13:01.000 You can't just make stuff up like that.
02:13:03.000 Well, you can in Game of Thrones.
02:13:04.000 Yeah.
02:13:05.000 I don't know.
02:13:05.000 I just couldn't get into it.
02:13:06.000 Walking Dead is my show.
02:13:08.000 Okay.
02:13:08.000 Here's my take on The Walking Dead.
02:13:10.000 The new one is fucking better. 0.97
02:13:12.000 I like The Walking Dead. 0.99
02:13:14.000 It's better.
02:13:14.000 With the dead, he's always played a terrorist until this role.
02:13:18.000 He's only ever been...
02:13:19.000 Poor guy.
02:13:20.000 But you know what?
02:13:20.000 He broke out of it, man.
02:13:21.000 He did.
02:13:22.000 Good for him.
02:13:23.000 You know what?
02:13:23.000 Broke through the brown ceiling.
02:13:24.000 This is an episode, I don't want to bring it up, but when he went jog...
02:13:26.000 I don't want to bring it up.
02:13:27.000 What am I lying?
02:13:28.000 He went jogging, and he comes home, he's all sweaty, and then the next scene, he doesn't have any sweat, and then the next scene, he's sweaty.
02:13:34.000 In fear of walking back?
02:13:35.000 Yeah, they go back and forth for him being soaked with sweat and no sweat, and soaked with sweat. 0.99
02:13:40.000 Very, very shitty job. 0.69
02:13:43.000 Whoever was the set person that dealt with the wardrobe and continuity, the sweat spray. 0.98
02:13:49.000 Well, that's a real problem with girls, too. 1.00
02:13:51.000 Because Elena Dunham has a severe perspiration problem. 1.00
02:13:54.000 She doesn't shower as well.
02:13:56.000 What do you mean she doesn't shower? 1.00
02:13:57.000 I'm making stuff up.
02:13:57.000 I want to spread rumors.
02:13:58.000 Oh, okay.
02:13:58.000 How dare you?
02:13:59.000 See, now you're part of the problem.
02:14:01.000 I'm just doing Elena Dunham.
02:14:02.000 But you are what you are is what they think you are, though.
02:14:06.000 I'm just joking. 0.88
02:14:06.000 You're being mean and vicious. 0.88
02:14:08.000 I am mean.
02:14:08.000 I am mean with someone like Elena Dunham.
02:14:10.000 You claim rape falsely. 0.73
02:14:12.000 I know someone very close to me who was raped.
02:14:17.000 The same thing, you know, my wife and I, we volunteer, but her more so at a special needs place. 0.95
02:14:21.000 And so when people feign this offense that retarded, I've watched special needs people call other special needs people retarded. 0.73
02:14:28.000 Well, the problem is retarded doesn't mean Down syndrome. 0.97
02:14:31.000 It just doesn't. 1.00
02:14:33.000 What they used to put on people's birth certificates when they were born with Down syndrome, they used to call them mongoloid idiots. 0.99
02:14:40.000 That was literally what they used to put the medical term for someone who had Down syndrome. 1.00
02:14:46.000 What retarded is to retard growth. 1.00
02:14:48.000 What does that mean? 0.99
02:14:49.000 You are slow.
02:14:50.000 You are behind. 1.00
02:14:51.000 If you're a fucking dummy, you're retarded. 1.00
02:14:54.000 Are you retarded? 1.00
02:14:55.000 Retard. 1.00
02:14:57.000 Like, excusez-moi, je suis un retard, means sorry I'm late. 0.87
02:15:00.000 Retard means to be late, to be slow to arrive. 1.00
02:15:03.000 And it comes from all the Romance languages come from Latin, and so that's where it comes from, which is like Negro. 1.00
02:15:08.000 It's not racist until people said it was racist, and they forgot to tell all the United Negro College funds.
02:15:14.000 Well, how about the NAACP? That's the craziest one. 0.92
02:15:17.000 National Association for the Advancement of Colored People?
02:15:19.000 Like, what?
02:15:21.000 But now we say people of color!
02:15:22.000 That was funny about that woman, you know, the Rachel Dolezal chick who was actually really white and pretended to be black and had the fake tan and all that jazz. 1.00
02:15:32.000 It's hilarious.
02:15:33.000 But what's hilarious is she is of color.
02:15:35.000 She's white.
02:15:36.000 You know, I mean, it was not only that, the NAACP was founded by white people, was made by white progressives. 0.93
02:15:41.000 And when it was founded, black people couldn't even hold, they couldn't be in a position of leadership. 1.00
02:15:47.000 They weren't allowed to, which is kind of fucked up. 0.99
02:15:50.000 Well, what's funny, what I find so funny about her is now the whole transphobic thing is a new movement. 1.00
02:15:54.000 I think she has a black baby inside of her. 1.00
02:15:56.000 Does she? 0.99
02:15:56.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:15:57.000 She's pregnant. 1.00
02:15:58.000 It's like a James Cameron sci-fi film? 1.00
02:16:01.000 Listen, she's pregnant and you know that she's fucking black eyes, right? 1.00
02:16:05.000 I don't know it for a fact. 1.00
02:16:07.000 I wouldn't doubt it.
02:16:08.000 I'm gonna bet a lot.
02:16:11.000 I'm gonna go all in. 1.00
02:16:13.000 I'm pushing the fucking pile of chips in that she fucked a black guy. 1.00
02:16:17.000 Not to say anything wrong with that. 1.00
02:16:18.000 I have no problem with that whatsoever.
02:16:20.000 I just want to say that right away. 0.82
02:16:21.000 But I think maybe she wanted to be a little more black. 0.99
02:16:25.000 Well, Sean King too.
02:16:26.000 I mean, listen, you have people who don't aspire to be architects.
02:16:30.000 They don't aspire to be scientists.
02:16:31.000 They aspire to be professional victims.
02:16:33.000 That's what you have with Sean King, as we have with Rachel Dolezal. 0.56
02:16:35.000 Well, there's money in that.
02:16:36.000 There's not just money.
02:16:38.000 I mean, I shouldn't say there's money in it, but what I should say is that there's success in that.
02:16:43.000 Oh, absolutely.
02:16:44.000 You can tap into that vein quite easily.
02:16:47.000 It doesn't require a lot of thinking.
02:16:49.000 And you immediately get people that won't challenge it.
02:16:54.000 Because it's one of those things.
02:16:55.000 If you become one of those people that becomes a professional victim, boy, you don't get challenged much.
02:17:00.000 It's just hands off.
02:17:02.000 And I can see the headlines right now at Salon.
02:17:04.000 Two white guys talk about the black American lifestyle.
02:17:06.000 Well, in all fairness, I am Sicilian mostly, and that means that I am of mixed heritage. 0.88
02:17:12.000 There's a black man hiding in a woodpile somewhere. 0.96
02:17:15.000 They were raped by the Moors. 0.99
02:17:16.000 You saw True Romance. 0.97
02:17:18.000 That's the fact. 1.00
02:17:19.000 My fucking grandparents are from Sicily. 1.00
02:17:21.000 There's a black man jumping out of the shed somewhere down with one of your female ancestors. 1.00
02:17:24.000 I think it's more of a dark Muslim character, right? 1.00
02:17:27.000 The Moors?
02:17:28.000 I think they were from Africa, though, right?
02:17:30.000 Here's one thing I thought about Rachel Dolezal.
02:17:32.000 You've got...
02:17:33.000 Do you think about her a lot?
02:17:34.000 I do.
02:17:34.000 I do.
02:17:36.000 The Sideshow Bob just does it for me.
02:17:39.000 Sideshow Bob?
02:17:40.000 Yeah, the Sideshow Bob hairdo.
02:17:41.000 Oh.
02:17:44.000 I don't even know what that means, but it's funny.
02:17:46.000 The Simpsons, Sideshow Bomb?
02:17:47.000 Krusty sidekick?
02:17:48.000 That's where it's from.
02:17:50.000 Can you picture it now?
02:17:51.000 Yeah, I can.
02:17:51.000 Can you bring up Sideshow Bomb?
02:17:54.000 Think about this for a second.
02:17:55.000 Well, she had to do that.
02:17:57.000 Oh, that's hilarious!
02:17:58.000 It's so perfect!
02:18:00.000 That's hilarious!
02:18:01.000 But she had to do that in order to look more black. 1.00
02:18:03.000 Well, here's what's so funny.
02:18:04.000 She did the black, white girl hair. 0.81
02:18:06.000 So she got the perm, but then she liked the light brown.
02:18:08.000 Let me compare it.
02:18:10.000 You're not the only one.
02:18:11.000 Look, who did it better?
02:18:12.000 Ha ha ha!
02:18:14.000 But here's the crazy thing, okay?
02:18:16.000 People say, well, transracial's not a thing.
02:18:18.000 Transgender's a thing.
02:18:19.000 Oh, why isn't it a thing?
02:18:19.000 Well, that's what I'm saying.
02:18:20.000 Look, Caitlyn Jenner, or Fallon Fox, right?
02:18:22.000 Caitlyn Jenner can go through hormone replacement therapy, get all the plastic surgery, start changing his voice, and guess what?
02:18:29.000 People see him, and they still realize that's a dude.
02:18:31.000 Well, you know what's really funny?
02:18:32.000 Rachel Dozo slapped on a tan and a perm and fooled the NAACP. You tell me what's more realistic. 0.99
02:18:38.000 Well, she did go to an all-black college, and she got a scholarship there, right?
02:18:43.000 Yeah.
02:18:43.000 Would she go to Morehouse?
02:18:44.000 I don't know her.
02:18:44.000 I know Sean King got the black thing from Oprah.
02:18:48.000 What do you mean?
02:18:49.000 Yeah, he got some kind of a scholarship for being a victim of a hate crime as a black guy, but what's funny is the actual police report from that crime, he checked the Caucasian box! 0.95
02:19:00.000 So it's not only on your birth certificate, that's a who's on first routine at the police station.
02:19:05.000 No.
02:19:06.000 You're a victim of a hate crime? 0.99
02:19:07.000 Yeah, it's a black man. 0.99
02:19:07.000 You checked a Caucasian, that's right. 0.99
02:19:09.000 Oh my god. 1.00
02:19:10.000 Fuck, I forgot what I was going to say because we were talking about, that's so funny, you broke my brain. 1.00
02:19:16.000 Ugh. 1.00
02:19:16.000 The transgender thing's been coming out so fast. 1.00
02:19:18.000 That's what it was. 1.00
02:19:19.000 My fucking five-year-old, man, was watching Caitlyn Jenner on the show, whatever it was. 0.99
02:19:26.000 I am Kate, whatever. 1.00
02:19:28.000 And she goes, Mommy, why is that man dressed like a girl? 0.99
02:19:32.000 The five-year-old said that.
02:19:34.000 And my wife just covered her mouth like this. 1.00
02:19:37.000 Yeah.
02:19:38.000 That was me with my dad, Richard Simmons.
02:19:39.000 My daughter was serious.
02:19:40.000 She was serious.
02:19:41.000 She's like, Mommy, why is that man dressed like a girl? 1.00
02:19:45.000 And if you don't say it's normal, it's hateful.
02:19:47.000 If you say it, that's a little weird.
02:19:48.000 She's beautiful.
02:19:49.000 You go, girl.
02:19:50.000 My friend Whitney Cummings, I've talked about this too many times, I can't talk about it anymore.
02:19:54.000 She put it on her Instagram, hero, with a picture of him.
02:19:56.000 I don't see a fireman.
02:19:59.000 I don't see a first responder.
02:20:01.000 And he killed a guy.
02:20:02.000 Yes, a girl.
02:20:03.000 A woman.
02:20:03.000 Oh, a girl, that's right.
02:20:04.000 A real woman.
02:20:05.000 Pushed her into traffic by spacing out behind the wheel and slamming into someone.
02:20:09.000 Well, you had that tranny out here, Buck Angel, who challenged me to a fight because I wrote about Fallon Fox. 1.00
02:20:16.000 And I was like, what did you write?
02:20:17.000 I wrote that, okay, this was my argument.
02:20:19.000 This was a long time ago.
02:20:20.000 I wrote it when I was at Fox News.
02:20:22.000 And before anyone else was talking about it, I said, okay, because it wasn't really a national story.
02:20:26.000 Right.
02:20:27.000 Christiane Cyborg, right?
02:20:29.000 She had her belt removed to strike force because they found out she popped for steroids. 1.00
02:20:33.000 Remember?
02:20:33.000 Because she took male hormones.
02:20:34.000 Male hormones, right? 0.56
02:20:35.000 So they said, okay, that's enough or we're going to take away your belt. 0.92
02:20:37.000 Right?
02:20:37.000 Why?
02:20:38.000 Because there's an unfair advantage.
02:20:39.000 Well, it's not just an unfair advantage.
02:20:42.000 It's a banned substance.
02:20:43.000 It's not even natural to your body.
02:20:45.000 Right.
02:20:46.000 Well, my whole point is Fallon Fox has been taking steroids her whole life. 0.98
02:20:50.000 They're called balls. 0.90
02:20:51.000 Because if you actually look at a woman taking steroids, It's still nowhere near the hormonal advantage that a man has over a woman. 1.00
02:20:57.000 As a matter of fact, Arnold Schwarzenegger, like a walking human pincushion in his prime, doesn't enjoy the hormonal advantage over me that I enjoy over the basic woman.
02:21:07.000 It's that much of a gap.
02:21:08.000 So to act like it goes away because, you know, you grab a hair straightener and you put on a bikini.
02:21:15.000 It's just not accurate.
02:21:16.000 And Buck Angel was like, I'll tell you.
02:21:18.000 I'm like, first off, there's a reason for weight classes. 0.97
02:21:20.000 Secondly, of course, you need to have the HIV testing, all that, because you're a porn star. 0.98
02:21:24.000 Thirdly, I'm not going to fight you. 0.99
02:21:26.000 You wouldn't fight Buck?
02:21:28.000 Buck's a nice guy, but he's not that big.
02:21:31.000 And you're a lot bigger person.
02:21:33.000 And Buck has a female frame.
02:21:35.000 He has small hands and small shoulders.
02:21:39.000 That's the whole thing, but it's hiding behind the bully pulpit, right?
02:21:41.000 A woman like that nowhere else would be like, hey, Stephen, I want to fight you. 1.00
02:21:45.000 But because you said this about Fallon Fox, which is entirely accurate, by the way, and I stand by it, I walk it back zero.
02:21:49.000 The whole trans community has to tell me I'm hateful. 0.99
02:21:52.000 Meanwhile, Fallon Fox is just beating the crap out of women. 1.00
02:21:55.000 And you know... 0.98
02:21:56.000 There's no technique there.
02:21:57.000 Fallon Fox is not a good fighter.
02:21:59.000 It's just pure strength.
02:22:01.000 It looks very much like domestic violence.
02:22:03.000 Well, it does when you watch it.
02:22:05.000 Yes, it does.
02:22:06.000 And she's not very technical.
02:22:08.000 And there's also really a problem.
02:22:10.000 My friend Steph Daniels wrote a piece for Bloody Elbow.
02:22:14.000 She wrote several pieces about this issue, and she did a very good job of being completely objective and interviewing a bunch of different experts on it.
02:22:23.000 And she found that there is a big discrepancy between gender reassignment doctors, quote-unquote experts, who have one opinion on it, that you are a woman now, You have no advantages whatsoever.
02:22:34.000 And those are the people that they've talked to the IOC and they've made it so that in the Olympics there's no discrepancy.
02:22:44.000 But my position is as a combat sports expert.
02:22:48.000 I think there's a giant difference between having a male frame and a female frame.
02:22:52.000 Then there's this woman, Dr. Ramona Krutzik, who is, they wrote a piece for Bloody Elbow.
02:22:59.000 And she went into great detail.
02:23:02.000 She's an endocrinologist.
02:23:03.000 Board-certified endocrinologist went into great detail about the significant advantages in bone density and the fact that the bone density, not only does it not decrease with the use of estrogen, but estrogen is in fact what keeps bone density in women.
02:23:16.000 That's one of the reasons why when women drop their estrogen as they get older, they start getting osteoporosis. 1.00
02:23:21.000 And so she was saying that you have an advantage.
02:23:24.000 It preserves it.
02:23:25.000 Not only that, there's advantages in terms of reaction time.
02:23:29.000 The average man has a 10% faster reaction time than a woman, which is massively significant when you're talking about striking. 1.00
02:23:39.000 When you see guys like Roy Jones Jr., they lose a tick, still faster than you or me, by a long shot, but he loses a tick.
02:23:47.000 I don't know, bro.
02:23:47.000 I don't know, bro.
02:23:47.000 I brunched 275, bro.
02:23:49.000 Dude, I hear you, bro.
02:23:50.000 You don't know the rage that I get.
02:23:52.000 Joe, I'm mental.
02:23:55.000 Why did you go into Joey D's?
02:23:57.000 I don't know.
02:23:58.000 That was Dama Herrera again. 0.94
02:23:59.000 Was it Dama Herrera?
02:24:00.000 I'm sorry.
02:24:00.000 I didn't mean to insult the impression.
02:24:02.000 You'd have to kill me.
02:24:04.000 But the reaction time's quicker, and also the fact that you live your whole life as a man. 0.99
02:24:11.000 Like, your body is, your tendon strength, there's so many different things.
02:24:15.000 So Dr. Ramona Krutzik, you know, puts his piece out. 0.99
02:24:18.000 They fucking attack Steffi. 1.00
02:24:21.000 They attacked her. 1.00
02:24:22.000 Great job ruining all your great work.
02:24:25.000 Because she had interviewed all these different people with different opinions.
02:24:28.000 It wasn't even her opinion.
02:24:29.000 She went to a board-certified endocrinologist who had an objective point of view.
02:24:33.000 And this person said, yes, there's significant advantages.
02:24:36.000 Here they are, scientifically laid out.
02:24:39.000 Here's something I wrote about that no one else really talks about.
02:24:41.000 All these organic sort of leftist hippie granola, right, they want organic and they don't want BPAs. 0.82
02:24:46.000 Well, what's the big problem with BPA, right?
02:24:49.000 You know, xenoestrogens, the people talk about it mimics estrogen in the body, and that leads to cancer, right?
02:24:54.000 Too much estrogen in the body.
02:24:56.000 They talk about that, drinking hormones in the milk.
02:24:58.000 They talk about that with BPA and pesticides.
02:25:01.000 So we all widely acknowledge that estrogen elevated beyond normal levels in the human body is probably not great, right, for human health.
02:25:09.000 When injected directly into your ball sack, however, we're supposed to turn a blind eye and say, well, the science isn't in yet for the transgender community. 0.61
02:25:17.000 But don't drink from that plastic bottle. 0.87
02:25:18.000 Make sure it's a mason jar.
02:25:19.000 They've got lids for that.
02:25:21.000 But when they're doing direct estrogen injections, well, we don't know, really.
02:25:25.000 Well, then don't buy organic and drink up your BPA. It becomes an ideological issue more than it becomes a scientific issue.
02:25:34.000 And you are not allowed.
02:25:35.000 It's like we were talking about when we were talking about abortion earlier.
02:25:38.000 You're not allowed to have a varying opinion.
02:25:40.000 Right.
02:25:40.000 Like, you have to stay within the lines.
02:25:42.000 Like, you said that I'm considered, you know, I'd be considered left-wing by a lot of people.
02:25:46.000 But I'm in the NRA. I didn't want to bring it up.
02:25:51.000 I talk about it.
02:25:52.000 I think you should be allowed to have guns.
02:25:54.000 I don't think that guns are bad.
02:25:56.000 I wrote about this, that we have a mental health problem disguised as a gun problem.
02:26:01.000 And that's a real problem.
02:26:04.000 There's a real issue with mental health in this country.
02:26:07.000 And I don't know if it's unique to this country or if the problem is that these people that have these mental health issues have more access to guns than they have in other states or in other countries, rather.
02:26:18.000 I don't think the issue is removing the guns.
02:26:20.000 I think the issue is trying to figure out as an advanced society with a nuanced, objective point of view why people would ever want to kill a bunch of people they don't know.
02:26:29.000 What is it that is causing folks to do that?
02:26:32.000 Not what are the tools they're using to do that.
02:26:34.000 That doesn't make any sense to me.
02:26:35.000 And taking those tools away from people that would never do that. 0.96
02:26:38.000 I know so many hunters and so many people that are gun enthusiasts that are the nicest fucking people in the world and don't do a goddamn thing wrong every day and to think that you can take away their rights, the own firearms, because One crazy person does something. 0.93
02:26:55.000 What are we going to do if crazy people just drive into crowds? 0.96
02:26:58.000 What are we going to do when someone stomps on the gas and heads towards an outdoor mall and just plows over a bunch of people because they have demons in their head or because they didn't take their pills that day?
02:27:07.000 Are we going to take away the right to drive?
02:27:09.000 It seems like we're going down that road anyway with these cars that are going to be self-driving.
02:27:15.000 There's going to be issues involving the rights of people to drive.
02:27:18.000 Just decide to go out for a drive.
02:27:20.000 The Second Amendment is the right to self-preservation.
02:27:23.000 Yes.
02:27:23.000 You know, and people go like, well, why do you get so...
02:27:24.000 Well, it was made back when people had muskets. 0.97
02:27:27.000 Right.
02:27:27.000 Well, I did a video on that.
02:27:28.000 You'd realize that's completely untrue. 1.00
02:27:29.000 You have a loose penis. 1.00
02:27:30.000 Small penis. 1.00
02:27:31.000 Is that what it is? 1.00
02:27:32.000 Have you heard of the Puckle Gun?
02:27:33.000 Girondoni Air Rifle?
02:27:34.000 Belt and Flintlock? 0.97
02:27:35.000 You know those guns?
02:27:36.000 Yes.
02:27:36.000 Those could fire 30 rounds in a second, you know, or 20 seconds.
02:27:39.000 We have a letter from, I think it was Madison, to a private ship where they said, hey, can we have cannons to stop piracy?
02:27:47.000 Second Amendment, of course you can have cannons. 0.99
02:27:48.000 So they knew, as a matter of fact, they had placed orders for some of these high capacity, really advanced weapons that just wasn't cost effective for the American government.
02:27:55.000 When was the Second Amendment drafted?
02:27:58.000 Gosh, I'm terrible with numbers, but the puckle gun and the belt and flintlock and a lot of these guns already exist.
02:28:03.000 Was it before the outlaw Josie Wales Gatlin gun?
02:28:06.000 Yes! 1.00
02:28:07.000 Those were the shit! 1.00
02:28:09.000 I did a video on it. 1.00
02:28:10.000 I'll send it to you afterwards.
02:28:12.000 December 15, 1791. Drafted, yeah, Bill of Rights.
02:28:15.000 Okay, there we go.
02:28:16.000 Interesting.
02:28:17.000 That's why I never do the numbers thing. 0.66
02:28:19.000 Well, 1791, their guns sucked, let's be honest.
02:28:22.000 Google belt and flintlock puckle gun.
02:28:25.000 Please, Google it.
02:28:26.000 Girondoni air rifle.
02:28:27.000 That's what they used to outfit Lewis and Clark, the Girondoni air rifle.
02:28:30.000 Really?
02:28:31.000 Yeah.
02:28:31.000 Fascinating weaponry.
02:28:32.000 First off, that's not the argument you want to get into because the First Amendment doesn't only apply to a printing press.
02:28:39.000 Right.
02:28:40.000 The Leos didn't have the internet back then.
02:28:43.000 People had feathers!
02:28:44.000 They wrote with feathers!
02:28:45.000 You can't just put anything you want on a blog!
02:28:49.000 I mean, that's really the argument, right?
02:28:51.000 Isn't that the argument? 0.98
02:28:52.000 Well, how about fucking Hunter S. Thompson? 0.95
02:28:55.000 I mean, if anybody violated what a lot of people would think the First Amendment should stand for, that guy took real facts and added fiction to them, and that was the First Amendment. 0.97
02:29:04.000 I mean, he was allowed to do that. 0.95
02:29:05.000 I mean, he caused a fucking political candidate running for president to lose his mind, because people thought that he was on Ibogaine. 1.00
02:29:11.000 The guy had mental breakdowns. 0.99
02:29:13.000 I mean, you know the whole deal with Ed Muskie, when Ed Muskie was running for president?
02:29:17.000 No, I don't.
02:29:17.000 Oh my god, you gotta see the movie, uh, is it Fear and Loathing?
02:29:20.000 What is it?
02:29:22.000 What is the documentary?
02:29:23.000 Gonzo?
02:29:24.000 But what is it?
02:29:25.000 It's Gonzo, and then there's something else behind it.
02:29:27.000 Whatever. 0.99
02:29:27.000 It's a fucking fantastic documentary. 0.99
02:29:30.000 It's one of my all-time favorite offers. 0.99
02:29:32.000 Now that's a moment right there where I could have just lied.
02:29:33.000 Do you realize that?
02:29:34.000 I see people do that, like, where you're like, do you know this?
02:29:36.000 And I could have said, yes.
02:29:38.000 People do that all the time.
02:29:40.000 Gonzo, the life and work of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson.
02:29:42.000 That's amazing.
02:29:43.000 It's an amazing documentary. 0.97
02:29:45.000 It's so fucking good. 0.90
02:29:46.000 But it goes into great detail about how he would just add fiction to stories. 0.99
02:29:51.000 He was a journalist, but he would just make shit up. 0.99
02:29:53.000 And so he made this shit up about them bringing in a Brazilian doctor because they knew that Muskie had some Ibogaine addiction. 0.99
02:29:59.000 And he goes, there was a rumor going around. 0.99
02:30:01.000 And so he was on, I think it was a Dick Cavett show. 0.95
02:30:05.000 It's a fucking hilarious interview. 0.92
02:30:07.000 And he goes, well, there was a rumor going around. 0.98
02:30:09.000 I started the rumor.
02:30:11.000 Well, like Lena Dunham, it's a perspiration problem. 0.89
02:30:14.000 Did you start that?
02:30:15.000 Well, everybody, I have a perspiration problem.
02:30:16.000 I came here from yoga class, man.
02:30:18.000 I was soaking wet.
02:30:18.000 That's true.
02:30:18.000 You came from yoga class.
02:30:20.000 Now, the Second Amendment goes back to the issue of you either believe in self-preservation or not.
02:30:24.000 And that's why I know Amy's a friend of yours.
02:30:25.000 But when she gets up there and she's pushing gun control, What is she pushing those specifically when someone says gun control? 0.94
02:30:31.000 I believe in gun control. 0.89
02:30:33.000 I believe that crazy people shouldn't be allowed to have guns.
02:30:36.000 I believe that if you have a history of violent behavior and a history of violent crime, you shouldn't be able to go to a store and buy a gun.
02:30:43.000 I bet you believe the same thing.
02:30:45.000 I don't want to misspeak as to what it is that Chuck is specifically pushing.
02:30:48.000 Well, I do think those things, but I also don't believe in leaving it to the...
02:30:51.000 So that's gun control, right?
02:30:51.000 Well, no, because the...
02:30:52.000 Now, see, that's one thing where everyone goes, well, yeah, of course we don't want crazy people getting guns.
02:30:56.000 Right.
02:30:56.000 But do you really want the government then deciding who's mentally fit?
02:31:00.000 Have you taken a Xanax?
02:31:01.000 You're not mentally fit.
02:31:02.000 You ever had anxiety?
02:31:03.000 Right.
02:31:03.000 Nick Diaz and your prescription for anxiety marijuana?
02:31:06.000 You can't buy a gun.
02:31:07.000 No, I don't believe that we have the parameters yet to determine that.
02:31:11.000 Well, do you realize that federally, for the longest time, that was actually the case, that if you did have a prescription for medical marijuana, because it's federally illegal, you weren't allowed to have a handgun.
02:31:19.000 That would make sense.
02:31:20.000 Or you weren't allowed to have a rifle.
02:31:21.000 Well, that would make sense.
02:31:22.000 I mean, Barack Obama's, you know, federally prosecuted even people in Colorado, where he's talked about that, that he doesn't really want to leave that to the States.
02:31:28.000 I don't want to get off on the pot thing, because we actually agree on that.
02:31:31.000 But the gun thing is, it's an instinct for self-preservation.
02:31:35.000 So a lot of these celebrities, for example, I get really bothered personally because I've had to put my wife under security watch because of angry Muslims and union members. 1.00
02:31:42.000 Union members came after you?
02:31:45.000 Yeah.
02:31:45.000 For what?
02:31:48.000 You're one of those guys, I can bring something up and you go, yeah, that too.
02:31:52.000 Oh, you have a bunch of people here saying adopted footage.
02:31:54.000 I was punched in the face on national television.
02:31:56.000 What happened?
02:31:57.000 I was at a Right to Work rally.
02:31:59.000 It was being passed in Michigan, and I was there arguing with people, and a drunken guy wailed me in the face.
02:32:05.000 And there were about 5,000 union members.
02:32:06.000 They tore down a whole tent for people who were pro-right to work.
02:32:09.000 You can Google it, and people will say the footage was edited, but there's also 12-minute footage that I put up on my channel.
02:32:15.000 What union?
02:32:16.000 Which union?
02:32:20.000 Sure.
02:32:39.000 Who said you shoved the old guy, just people in the comments?
02:32:41.000 Oh, it's a whole conspiracy on the internet.
02:32:42.000 And I have a 12-minute video online.
02:32:44.000 Well, I don't even want to get into everything there because of the prosecutor.
02:32:47.000 You're on the internet and you can't pay attention to the internet.
02:32:49.000 How ironic.
02:32:50.000 I know.
02:32:51.000 I don't have the attention span.
02:32:52.000 So am I. Listen to this.
02:32:52.000 But what's funny is if you go watch it, knowing we talked about jiu-jitsu and stuff, my dad's like, did you grab a collar elbow tie and were you going for your uchimata?
02:32:59.000 I'm like, yeah, I was.
02:33:00.000 So you see me grab him.
02:33:01.000 He's wailing.
02:33:02.000 You were ready to toss him?
02:33:03.000 And I turn my hips in. 0.84
02:33:04.000 You can see the footage.
02:33:05.000 I turn my hips in and I see he's like, oh, shoot, there's 2,000 other people.
02:33:10.000 And so I just cover and run.
02:33:12.000 Let's watch this.
02:33:13.000 No, we have to do this.
02:33:14.000 Yes.
02:33:15.000 Yes.
02:33:16.000 Hello! 0.98
02:33:18.000 Back the fuck up? 0.95
02:33:20.000 So that's a tent that got torn down with box clubs. 0.98
02:33:22.000 And you're backing up.
02:33:23.000 And you backed up. 0.75
02:33:24.000 What does he limit you to back the fuck up over?
02:33:26.000 So this is where they say, and you know if you...
02:33:28.000 Oh, there's a...
02:33:29.000 Oh, he's swinging.
02:33:31.000 So see, I turned my...
02:33:33.000 Turn my hips and then just duck my head and go back.
02:33:35.000 That was a terrible technique.
02:33:37.000 Your hips weren't low enough. 1.00
02:33:38.000 Way too far.
02:33:38.000 Yeah, way too far.
02:33:39.000 Well, I did it.
02:33:40.000 It's tough to watch.
02:33:41.000 Did you get hit?
02:33:42.000 Yeah, I got hit full line.
02:33:43.000 That was baby punches, though. 1.00
02:33:45.000 That guy has shit technique, too. 1.00
02:33:47.000 This is terrible. 1.00
02:33:48.000 I can't even do commentary for this fight.
02:33:50.000 Well, you're not expecting it. 1.00
02:33:52.000 I mean, the fucking guy with his wind-up roundhouse punches, like, God, what an asshole. 1.00
02:33:57.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:33:58.000 I've said this before. 0.97
02:33:59.000 Why do people who can't fucking fight at all think they can get in fights? 1.00
02:34:02.000 Well, I was getting drunk off second-hand fumes. 0.99
02:34:04.000 Not you. 1.00
02:34:05.000 Those shits. 1.00
02:34:06.000 I was saying I was getting drunk off second-hand fumes. 1.00
02:34:08.000 Oh, he was hammered.
02:34:08.000 Oh, he was hammered.
02:34:09.000 They all were. 1.00
02:34:10.000 Back the fuck off! 1.00
02:34:12.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:34:12.000 Well, there's a lot of footage there, but... 1.00
02:34:13.000 Right to work!
02:34:15.000 Right to...
02:34:15.000 Well they hate right to work.
02:34:17.000 What is right to work?
02:34:18.000 It essentially means you don't have to be in a union to work.
02:34:21.000 Right.
02:34:21.000 Oh, so if there is a union, like an electrician's union or something like that, so if there is a union, you should join their union.
02:34:30.000 People are going nuts that we talked about that.
02:34:32.000 Well, there's a real issue with the UFC. I'm sure you're aware of it, the culinary union issue.
02:34:36.000 Well, I sent you that video on legalizing it in New York.
02:34:38.000 I did it a long time ago.
02:34:39.000 Yeah.
02:34:39.000 We reported on it.
02:34:40.000 And, matter of fact, the UFC was Jennifer Wink back then who was working there. 0.99
02:34:45.000 They were like...
02:34:47.000 I don't want to say they were very controlling until they realized that I wasn't trying to sandbag.
02:34:52.000 I'm like, listen, this is what I'm talking about.
02:34:54.000 I understand the union, the culinary union, and I want it to be legal in New York.
02:35:00.000 But even then, they were like, well, can you send us a cut of the video before it goes up?
02:35:03.000 And I was like, No, I can't.
02:35:04.000 So I interviewed Chael, and I interviewed Pat, and I interviewed Henzo and Henner Gracie, and we talked about it.
02:35:11.000 And that's what a lot of people don't understand, the Culinary Union in Nevada and their vendetta.
02:35:15.000 And we talked about Bob, you know, the Senator-Congressman there who said, the reason I'm against MMA in New York is because it's violent. 0.97
02:35:23.000 Yeah, that douchebag. 0.92
02:35:24.000 He's gone now. 0.98
02:35:25.000 He actually called into a show when I was on a show in Albany doing a radio show and he called in to argue with me.
02:35:32.000 How'd that go?
02:35:33.000 He had no arguments for us.
02:35:34.000 What about football?
02:35:35.000 What about boxing? 0.99
02:35:36.000 He's a corrupt politician. 0.93
02:35:37.000 I mean, didn't he get busted for corruption? 0.98
02:35:39.000 Is that the same guy?
02:35:40.000 When we talk about big money in politics, and we won't have time because I think you probably are going to let me go soon.
02:35:44.000 Well, no, no.
02:35:45.000 When people say Koch Brothers or Big Oil, Big Pharma, you look at the top political donors of all time, 15 out of the top 20 are unions.
02:35:52.000 And I got into this argument over Twitter with Gray Maynard, and he was just like, no, bro, it's corporate.
02:35:56.000 I go, listen.
02:35:57.000 No, bro.
02:35:57.000 You want to talk about corporations?
02:35:58.000 Whatever someone says, no, bro.
02:36:00.000 Yeah.
02:36:00.000 That's Craig Maynard.
02:36:01.000 He tweets that.
02:36:04.000 And I was like, listen, these are the top donors.
02:36:08.000 No one wants to talk about big unions.
02:36:09.000 By the way, they give virtually 99% to Democrats.
02:36:13.000 Big banks give 51% Republican, 49% Democrat because they're hedging their bets.
02:36:18.000 Unions, often public sector unions, you have no choice in whether you can join or not in these non-right-to-work states.
02:36:23.000 You join, they take your dues, and in turn, they use those dues to elect more Democrats who give them more kickbacks.
02:36:29.000 So I just think, yeah, there's a lot of money in politics, but everyone wants to talk about big oil and big pharma, and no one wants to talk about big unions, which is...
02:36:36.000 Far more influential force, and they get away with murder.
02:36:39.000 They get away with murder.
02:36:40.000 Well, it seems to be a part of the same problem, right?
02:36:42.000 It's like people get addicted to the money that comes out of that establishment.
02:36:45.000 They get addicted to the money.
02:36:47.000 That's what the Culinary Union, they know that they can make something like $15 million a year. 0.99
02:36:52.000 If the station casinos all went union.
02:36:55.000 Right.
02:36:55.000 And meanwhile, the people that work in the casinos have voted against it.
02:36:59.000 Now, I don't know the particulars of the case.
02:37:01.000 I don't know.
02:37:01.000 I don't know who's being told what to do.
02:37:04.000 But I just know that is what the fact is.
02:37:07.000 They did vote.
02:37:08.000 They voted to go non-union. 0.99
02:37:10.000 But these fucking culinary union guys, they've been attacking the UFC forever. 0.99
02:37:14.000 And they've been doing a lot of creepy shit to the casinos that are non-union. 0.99
02:37:18.000 They've set up shoppers. 0.98
02:37:31.000 Well, unions are in the Midwest.
02:37:35.000 Just like there's good people in every organization that's fucked ultimately. 0.97
02:37:39.000 But the whole, it's a mess, man. 0.97
02:37:41.000 That's a mess.
02:37:42.000 The unions in the Midwest, those are the kinds of, and that's what I was with my lawyers when we're dealing with this, and there was a prosecutor in Michigan who was, we found like almost all of his funding at that incident, was the AFL-CIO, which is a big union.
02:37:54.000 As a matter of fact, I was told there were about 50 people that day, not just me, who tried to file police reports.
02:37:58.000 Because that whole tent you saw was cut down with box cutters.
02:38:00.000 There was a black guy selling hot dogs whose thing was destroyed. 0.74
02:38:03.000 He was called the N-word. 0.63
02:38:04.000 This whole thing happened that day.
02:38:05.000 I still have a piece of the tent.
02:38:06.000 And there were dozens of people who tried to file police reports.
02:38:09.000 And they said, oh, we can't file police reports by phone.
02:38:12.000 Completely absurd.
02:38:12.000 Of course you can.
02:38:13.000 If someone's raped in Florida and you moved back to Ohio, you were on vacation, you can call in and say, hey, my daughter was raped in Florida.
02:38:17.000 So a lot of people tried to file reports.
02:38:19.000 They weren't able to.
02:38:21.000 A lot of people were in the tent when it went down.
02:38:24.000 And the same thing happened, you know, attack the messenger.
02:38:27.000 Oh, well, you really had no business being there.
02:38:29.000 You were provoking it.
02:38:30.000 Here's the beauty about assault. 1.00
02:38:31.000 If I right here go, hey, Joe Rogan, I think you suck. 1.00
02:38:34.000 Nanny nanny boo boo. 1.00
02:38:35.000 You can't hit me. 0.77
02:38:35.000 Guess what? 0.77
02:38:36.000 You still can't hit me.
02:38:37.000 Right.
02:38:38.000 That's the law.
02:38:39.000 Right.
02:38:39.000 You're only allowed to hit someone if you really believe that your life or your health is in danger.
02:38:44.000 Yeah.
02:38:45.000 Most of the time, you've got to be hit first.
02:38:47.000 Yeah.
02:38:47.000 I mean, it's hard to argue otherwise.
02:38:50.000 I mean, if two people are staring at each other and they're yelling at each other and someone decides to throw the first punch, that person is the antagonist.
02:38:57.000 That's the person who caused the issue.
02:38:59.000 Well, there's mutual combat laws and all that stuff.
02:39:01.000 Well, in Seattle.
02:39:03.000 It's in Washington State.
02:39:04.000 What's the name?
02:39:04.000 The superhero guy?
02:39:05.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:39:07.000 Phoenix Jones.
02:39:08.000 He's a good fighter.
02:39:08.000 Yes, he is.
02:39:09.000 That's the fucking problem. 1.00
02:39:11.000 He's fucking very good. 1.00
02:39:12.000 Did you ever see that one where he's like, mutual combat? 0.99
02:39:13.000 You want to go mutual combat?
02:39:14.000 And the guy goes up and he just, whack, leg kick, and the guy stops.
02:39:18.000 The guy was like, oh no.
02:39:20.000 Oh, I've made a bad choice.
02:39:22.000 Yeah, he's really good.
02:39:23.000 That's part of the problem.
02:39:24.000 Fyodor?
02:39:25.000 What's the name?
02:39:25.000 Fyodor?
02:39:26.000 Carlos Fodor.
02:39:27.000 Fodor.
02:39:28.000 Yeah.
02:39:29.000 That's his brother, right?
02:39:29.000 Well, his brother's a fighter, too.
02:39:31.000 Yeah.
02:39:31.000 I don't know what his name is, but...
02:39:33.000 Yeah, what is his...
02:39:33.000 He calls himself Phoenix Jones, right?
02:39:35.000 What is his real name?
02:39:36.000 I don't know. 0.98
02:39:36.000 He's a fucking very good fighter, though. 0.98
02:39:38.000 You could say... 0.99
02:39:39.000 It's really almost mean.
02:39:41.000 You know, that he walks around with a superhero outfit on.
02:39:43.000 It's not fair.
02:39:45.000 It's not fair at all. 0.98
02:39:46.000 Because he's fucking good, man. 0.97
02:39:48.000 Where he's like, I don't want to fight. 0.98
02:39:49.000 I'm here to keep peace.
02:39:50.000 But you know, deep down, he's like...
02:39:51.000 Give me a reason.
02:39:52.000 Please give me a reason.
02:39:54.000 It's hilarious for him, but he's been stabbed.
02:39:58.000 He's had, like, legit issues.
02:39:59.000 Oh, yeah.
02:40:00.000 He's broken up fights or stopped robberies and stuff.
02:40:03.000 Well, the worst part is, there was one where it was like the domestic abuse case.
02:40:07.000 Those are always the scary ones, right?
02:40:08.000 Well, because it doesn't matter.
02:40:10.000 The woman's still going to protect her man, even if it's well. 0.69
02:40:11.000 So he goes in and separates them.
02:40:13.000 She's wailing on him.
02:40:15.000 You ever seen that?
02:40:15.000 Have you seen that one?
02:40:16.000 No, I don't even want to see it. 0.97
02:40:18.000 Domestic abuse cases, they fucking freak me out because I grew up with that. 0.97
02:40:21.000 Well, more women committed than men. 0.99
02:40:23.000 Really?
02:40:23.000 Yeah, by far.
02:40:24.000 It's not even close.
02:40:25.000 What?
02:40:25.000 Not even close?
02:40:27.000 Yeah, it's not even close.
02:40:28.000 Yeah, but they don't do much damage.
02:40:29.000 That's the point.
02:40:31.000 Yeah, but that's the point.
02:40:31.000 We let them go.
02:40:32.000 Well, Ronda Rousey admitted recently that she beat the shit out of one of her ex-boyfriends because she caught him taking pictures of her. 0.99
02:40:38.000 And everybody's like, well, fucking free pass. 0.99
02:40:43.000 First of all, I believe it because it's Ronda Rousey. 1.00
02:40:47.000 If a girl says she beat the fuck, well, I know the dude. 0.99
02:40:50.000 He's actually a very good fighter. 1.00
02:40:53.000 He could fight himself. 0.99
02:40:54.000 But when Ronda Rousey says she beat a dude's ass, everybody goes, I can see that. 0.99
02:40:59.000 Yeah, but that's probably because of the Tom Jones syndrome where he realized he was wrong and took it. 0.99
02:41:03.000 I mean, you see her with...
02:41:04.000 Tom Jones syndrome?
02:41:05.000 What's that?
02:41:06.000 Well, it's a famous...
02:41:06.000 Tom Jones the singer?
02:41:07.000 Yeah, Tom Jones.
02:41:08.000 He talked about when he cheated on his wife and she found out and she just beat the hell out of him.
02:41:11.000 He's like, I sit there and took it because I deserved it.
02:41:13.000 And that's usually what happens in domestic abuse. 1.00
02:41:15.000 This is actually something you should have her on. 0.53
02:41:17.000 Karen Strawn.
02:41:18.000 Where we talked about it.
02:41:19.000 Oh, that girl writes what chick? 1.00
02:41:20.000 Yes.
02:41:21.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:41:21.000 I would love to have her on.
02:41:23.000 She talked about it, how men have always been punished for domestic abuse.
02:41:28.000 It's not like it's ever been okay.
02:41:29.000 Theodore Roosevelt, I think it was Teddy Roosevelt in 1906, wanted to bring back the whipping post for domestic abuse because he thought it was unfair to put a man in prison because then he could no longer...
02:41:44.000 What?
02:41:59.000 Yeah.
02:42:01.000 Yeah.
02:42:01.000 It's higher in lesbian community, well per capita, but there's not that many lesbians, right?
02:42:06.000 I don't know.
02:42:07.000 I don't have a chart, but I imagine there's...
02:42:09.000 I bet there's less lesbians than there are straight people. 1.00
02:42:12.000 I would wager.
02:42:15.000 How much higher though?
02:42:17.000 I don't have the numbers in front of me.
02:42:18.000 Jamie does.
02:42:20.000 Jamie, look up domestic violence in the lesbian community. 1.00
02:42:22.000 It's not as much higher between the lesbian community and the straight community as it is between women against men.
02:42:27.000 So women versus men, domestic violence, is this just reported domestic violence?
02:42:32.000 Okay, honest question.
02:42:33.000 Because a lot of women get smacked around and they don't report it. 1.00
02:42:35.000 Honest question.
02:42:36.000 Has your wife ever smacked you?
02:42:37.000 No.
02:42:37.000 She never punched you in the arm?
02:42:38.000 No, she's not like that. 0.99
02:42:39.000 Really?
02:42:40.000 No, she's not like that at all.
02:42:41.000 She's super easy going.
02:42:42.000 That's why I'm married to her.
02:42:44.000 My wife's, like, punched me in the arm, like, I can't believe you.
02:42:46.000 I grew up around violence, and I don't like it.
02:42:49.000 I mean, it sounds crazy talking to a guy who's a cage-fighting commentator who's done martial arts his whole life, but I don't like violence.
02:42:56.000 I'm that same way.
02:42:56.000 I don't like action.
02:42:58.000 I don't mind seeing it.
02:43:00.000 I like fights and I've always enjoyed competing.
02:43:05.000 It's not that, but that doesn't seem like violence to me, even though it is.
02:43:09.000 You have a mutually agreed upon meeting of two very skilled people who are going to try to impose their discipline, their will, their focus, their technique, their intelligence and their preparation on each other.
02:43:24.000 That's how I look at fighting.
02:43:25.000 Yeah, it's competition.
02:43:26.000 But I don't like people that love each other hitting each other. 1.00
02:43:28.000 That shit drives me crazy because I grew up with it. 1.00
02:43:30.000 And I don't... 1.00
02:43:31.000 I would never date a girl who tried to hit me. 0.96
02:43:34.000 Okay.
02:43:35.000 I don't want to make my wife feel like a monster. 1.00
02:43:37.000 Your wife beats your ass. 1.00
02:43:38.000 She fucked you up. 1.00
02:43:39.000 My wife's got range. 1.00
02:43:40.000 She's six foot and she's got this... 1.00
02:43:41.000 She's got a long jab. 1.00
02:43:42.000 Yeah, she was a runway model for years. 1.00
02:43:44.000 She like, you know, and I milked.
02:43:46.000 It didn't hurt.
02:43:47.000 You know, it's a good example, right?
02:43:48.000 It didn't hurt, but you milked it?
02:43:49.000 Yeah, I milked it.
02:43:50.000 I went to the bar and left and I was like, you know what?
02:43:52.000 I need to cool down.
02:43:54.000 I'm turning around like, oh my gosh, I can get whatever I want for the next week.
02:43:58.000 Terrible.
02:43:58.000 Don't do that.
02:43:58.000 It's bad for your marriage.
02:43:59.000 But it worked.
02:44:00.000 I will say this, that a good example is like a dog.
02:44:04.000 I see little dogs get into fights all the time.
02:44:06.000 They don't hurt each other.
02:44:07.000 If Hopper does it, they take him away.
02:44:09.000 Right, of course.
02:44:10.000 They take him away.
02:44:10.000 Of course.
02:44:10.000 He's never done it, but he was bitten by a little Pomeranian, and one time a dog did bite him.
02:44:17.000 It was the only time he actually had black fur in his teeth.
02:44:20.000 But here's the thing.
02:44:21.000 If Hopper wanted to bite his neck, he would have bitten his neck.
02:44:23.000 People don't realize, dogs, that's a clipping.
02:44:24.000 That's like the mom sound of the teeth.
02:44:26.000 That's to say, back off.
02:44:28.000 But my friend, actually my producer, Gay Jared, he's got a little Australian Shepherd, and they'll get into fights. 1.00
02:44:35.000 You call him Gay Jared?
02:44:36.000 Is that what you call him? 0.95
02:44:37.000 Or is his first name gay?
02:44:38.000 He claims he's not gay. 0.99
02:44:39.000 He claims he's not gay. 0.99
02:44:40.000 The jury's still out.
02:44:41.000 His Twitter handle is NotGayJarred.
02:44:43.000 You can follow his...
02:44:44.000 It's NotGayJarred? 0.89
02:44:45.000 That's his Twitter handle?
02:44:45.000 That's his Twitter handle.
02:44:46.000 It's N-O-T-G-A-Y. You can follow him and draw your own conclusions. 1.00
02:44:50.000 Legally, I'm obligated to say he's not.
02:44:54.000 Another one.
02:44:54.000 There's a lot of those guys.
02:44:56.000 See, I think it's fucked up, man. 1.00
02:44:57.000 I think it should be really easy to be gay. 1.00
02:44:59.000 Then we'd find out who the fuck is who. 1.00
02:45:01.000 No, no, no. 0.99
02:45:01.000 I wouldn't have a problem with it. 0.99
02:45:02.000 He just says he's not.
02:45:03.000 Okay, let's see here.
02:45:04.000 National Violence Against Women survey found that 21.5% of men and 35.4% of women living with same-sex partners experience intimate partner physical violence.
02:45:14.000 Well, that includes gay, not lesbian. 0.51
02:45:16.000 Yeah, that's exactly what we're saying. 0.99
02:45:17.000 That shows that lesbians are more likely to beat up their partners than gay men are. 0.98
02:45:23.000 Much more.
02:45:23.000 Comparable with 7.1% and 20.4% for men and women respectively with a history of only opposite sex cohabitation.
02:45:32.000 That's crazy.
02:45:33.000 So what that says is that 7.1% of women have experienced domestic violence by men, but 20.4% of men have experienced domestic violence by women.
02:45:45.000 The good thing, what that says to me...
02:45:47.000 Is that I am not alone, Joe.
02:45:48.000 Okay, but that's Massachusetts.
02:45:50.000 See that right there? 0.99
02:45:51.000 Massachusetts is filled with monsters. 1.00
02:45:54.000 Drunk Boston. 1.00
02:45:54.000 Those women... 1.00
02:45:55.000 You fucking queer! 1.00
02:45:57.000 They beat your ass. 1.00
02:45:58.000 They're terrible people. 1.00
02:46:00.000 They're terrible people. 0.99
02:46:00.000 The only chick that I ever had take a swing at me was a girl that I dated from Boston. 0.99
02:46:04.000 Really?
02:46:04.000 She took a swing at me while I was fighting.
02:46:06.000 I was in the middle of competition back then.
02:46:10.000 Taekwondo?
02:46:10.000 No, I was kickboxing.
02:46:11.000 I was fucking crazy. 0.98
02:46:13.000 Like, and this chick took a swing at me, and I watched it coming, and I was like, I don't even believe this is happening. 0.99
02:46:18.000 And I ducked under it, and I grabbed ahold of her. 0.99
02:46:21.000 I'm like, what are you doing?
02:46:22.000 Are you hitting me?
02:46:23.000 Are you trying to hit me? 1.00
02:46:24.000 That was the only time a girl, ah, you fucking queer! 1.00
02:46:27.000 Ah! 1.00
02:46:29.000 They're monsters. 1.00
02:46:29.000 They're drunk. 1.00
02:46:30.000 They're eating potatoes. 1.00
02:46:31.000 They're just fucking swinging at you. 1.00
02:46:33.000 That's why it's Massachusetts. 0.99
02:46:34.000 I bet you look at the rest of the country, it's probably totally different numbers.
02:46:38.000 No, I don't think it's totally different numbers.
02:46:40.000 Speaking of kickboxing, have you seen Guy Mezker recently?
02:46:42.000 Yeah.
02:46:43.000 That guy is in great shape for his age.
02:46:45.000 Oh, he's in very good shape.
02:46:46.000 He's unreal.
02:46:47.000 He's had some issues with cognitive damage from his fighting career, but I have to have him on because we talked about this.
02:46:59.000 He's gone through some pretty unique therapy.
02:47:01.000 There's a guy in Dallas that's doing some very unique therapy, dealing with a lot of the cognitive issues that he had because of his long-term fighting career.
02:47:11.000 Well, he's really taken my dad under his wing.
02:47:13.000 Guy is?
02:47:14.000 He's a great dude.
02:47:15.000 I want to say he's a great guy, but I just couldn't.
02:47:18.000 Guy's a great guy.
02:47:19.000 He's a great guy.
02:47:20.000 But he really is.
02:47:20.000 He's very intelligent.
02:47:22.000 He's soft-spoken.
02:47:23.000 He's just a really good person.
02:47:25.000 Yeah, he really, really is.
02:47:26.000 And he's been very, very supportive of my father there.
02:47:30.000 And there have been, like, jujitsu politics and stuff.
02:47:31.000 So my dad actually moved there from another school.
02:47:34.000 And, yeah, I was just going to say, I mean, jujitsu politics, how gross.
02:47:39.000 Well, you know what it is.
02:47:40.000 I mean, I'm the world's longest talked about that.
02:47:41.000 Like, I've been a blue belt for, I mean, I can't remember how long because I moved, and they saw it as like an act of disrespect, and I had to compete.
02:47:51.000 To get my blue belt, Joe, I had to win, it doesn't mean much, but I had to win Naga Worlds at white.
02:47:58.000 Which in Dallas, which means you might have people coming in from like 15 states.
02:48:01.000 You know, there might be 12, 15 people in your division.
02:48:03.000 You're likely sandbagging. 0.65
02:48:04.000 Right, right, right.
02:48:04.000 And then I was like, we've had people who were demoted.
02:48:09.000 Demoted?
02:48:09.000 Demoted because of like, you trained with other people.
02:48:11.000 So it's just one of those deals.
02:48:13.000 My dad started training.
02:48:14.000 Two, three years after me, he got his purple.
02:48:15.000 You gotta get away from any school that does that.
02:48:17.000 There's only a few schools that do do that, but goddammit, when they do that, it's so disrespectful and it's so bad for the whole overall community of martial arts because it turns people off when they realize that there's that kind of politics.
02:48:28.000 Yeah.
02:48:29.000 It's terrible, man. 0.96
02:48:30.000 I mean, Eddie Bravo experienced that for the longest fucking time because they thought he was disrespectful because he was teaching no-gi jiu-jitsu because he decided to develop a no-gi system. 0.97
02:48:41.000 Not even realizing he has a black belt under Jean-Jacques Machado. 0.96
02:48:45.000 And he trained with the gi forever. 0.67
02:48:47.000 It's not that he doesn't want to train with the gi.
02:48:49.000 He's trying to train mixed martial arts fighters.
02:48:51.000 And he's developing a system that would work with mixed martial arts competition.
02:48:54.000 Which, of course, you can't wear a gi anymore. 0.77
02:48:56.000 I will say this.
02:48:57.000 And I actually think Eddie Bravo is an incredible grappler.
02:49:00.000 But there's nothing more frustrating than when you have a kid come in with long pants.
02:49:05.000 And he just wants to sit in rubber guard and doesn't know how to use it.
02:49:07.000 Because he's read a book.
02:49:08.000 And he's talking about his edible mushrooms. 1.00
02:49:10.000 You're like, how about you learn a hip bump, bitch? 1.00
02:49:14.000 You know what I mean? 1.00
02:49:15.000 And then, sorry, Mom.
02:49:15.000 Well, you're always going to have problems.
02:49:17.000 I call that the blue belt hysteria syndrome. 0.63
02:49:21.000 Yeah, but I'll tell you what, there's a rash of him.
02:49:23.000 Yeah, you're going to get that.
02:49:24.000 Yeah, it's fun.
02:49:25.000 It's fun to be a contrarian.
02:49:27.000 It's fun to go against a group to be a rebel.
02:49:28.000 Oh my gosh, and they're just holding you to this poor rubber guard.
02:49:30.000 And that's actually a good example.
02:49:31.000 One of my Brazilian instructors can't stand Eddie.
02:49:34.000 Um, and you go, you know, what is that?
02:49:36.000 What's Robert Gard?
02:49:37.000 I tell you what, it's Nino Chambri!
02:49:39.000 He's taken from Nino Chambri!
02:49:41.000 Nino Chambri trained with Eddie.
02:49:42.000 I know, I know.
02:49:43.000 He gave Eddie all kinds of props.
02:49:44.000 But that's the kind of stuff you have to deal with in jiu-jitsu. 0.99
02:49:46.000 Well, that's people that are silly. 0.86
02:49:48.000 How much does your guy weigh, this Brazilian jiu-jitsu instructor? 0.98
02:49:51.000 How much what?
02:49:51.000 How much does he weigh, this guy that doesn't like Eddie?
02:49:54.000 He weighs about 210. Oh, that's a problem.
02:49:56.000 Eddie's about 170. If they're the same, even though, fucking Eddie would probably still tap him. 0.99
02:50:01.000 I think you can learn something from everyone. 1.00
02:50:02.000 Yeah, but guys who talk shit like that, they've never experienced it. 0.99
02:50:05.000 Roll with Vinny Magalhães. 0.99
02:50:07.000 Vinny Magalhães is about 220. Well, Brazilians really hate him.
02:50:10.000 Yeah, they do. 0.57
02:50:11.000 Yeah, they do. 1.00
02:50:12.000 Because he came out and said, Brazil's a crap hole compared to the United States. 0.99
02:50:16.000 I like living here. 1.00
02:50:17.000 And they're like, oh, you turn on your country.
02:50:20.000 I want to fight.
02:50:21.000 It's like, well, you know what?
02:50:22.000 He was...
02:50:22.000 Fight.
02:50:22.000 I want to fight.
02:50:25.000 If you ever want to actually do an impression like there are different dialects, but Diego Brandao, just imitate him.
02:50:30.000 Yeah, he's got a good one.
02:50:32.000 He's got a good one.
02:50:33.000 Just a little ball of hate.
02:50:34.000 Diego Brandao.
02:50:36.000 Well, he looked really good in his last fight. 0.99
02:50:38.000 What the fuck did he fight? 0.98
02:50:39.000 He fought a Japanese guy. 1.00
02:50:42.000 Oh, yeah.
02:50:42.000 It was in Japan, wasn't it?
02:50:43.000 Yes.
02:50:45.000 Mitsugaki?
02:50:46.000 No, no.
02:50:47.000 Mitsugaki is really...
02:50:48.000 That's the guy who...
02:50:48.000 That's 135. Mitsugaki's the guy...
02:50:50.000 145. Dominic Cruz massacred.
02:50:52.000 Right. 0.99
02:50:52.000 He fucked somebody up, though, man. 0.99
02:50:54.000 Where the hell was it? 0.99
02:50:55.000 Oh, oh, oh. 1.00
02:50:56.000 The dude who throws that crazy fucking front kick. 1.00
02:51:00.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:51:01.000 I don't know.
02:51:02.000 I know the Japanese weren't too happy with that. 0.93
02:51:03.000 Kakuno got fucked up in his last fight by Tony Ferguson, too. 0.96
02:51:07.000 He's having a hard time. 0.99
02:51:07.000 Hey, you know who doesn't have racial guilt? 0.99
02:51:09.000 Who?
02:51:09.000 Japanese people.
02:51:10.000 No, they don't.
02:51:11.000 They don't.
02:51:11.000 You're never gonna hear Japanese people say, I don't care what my grandkids look like.
02:51:14.000 No.
02:51:15.000 No, no, [... 1.00
02:51:16.000 They're racist as fuck. 1.00
02:51:17.000 Bob Sapp? 1.00
02:51:18.000 Put him on a billboard eating bananas.
02:51:20.000 Yeah, they make him eat bananas. 1.00
02:51:22.000 They don't give a fuck. 1.00
02:51:23.000 We never see a black man like you, bananas. 1.00
02:51:25.000 You are like a gorilla. 1.00
02:51:28.000 They stole that giant sex toy. 1.00
02:51:29.000 He ran with it to the bank. 0.99
02:51:31.000 He ran with it to the bank.
02:51:32.000 And then ran out of the cage.
02:51:33.000 Got his money.
02:51:34.000 We actually had an issue with them with the Yakuza.
02:51:38.000 There was an issue where they wanted him to fight without a contract.
02:51:41.000 And he was like, I need a contract.
02:51:43.000 After the fight, we give you a contract.
02:51:44.000 After the fight?
02:51:45.000 What?
02:51:46.000 Well, let me say one thing about Guy Mesker.
02:51:48.000 And we have to go, right?
02:51:49.000 Yeah, we're about three hours here.
02:51:50.000 All right, sorry.
02:51:51.000 Guy Mesker, I will say it just because, obviously, it's my home gym.
02:51:54.000 But, just for one second...
02:51:56.000 It's arguable Antonio Ruggiero Nogueira and the Arona fights.
02:52:00.000 Those were really close.
02:52:01.000 Those could have gone either way.
02:52:02.000 Right.
02:52:02.000 If you reverse those and the Vanderlei headbutt doesn't happen and it goes to a decision, he goes in the list of top light heavyweights ever.
02:52:10.000 Well, he's an excellent fighter.
02:52:12.000 You know, he was always an excellent fighter.
02:52:13.000 But no one mentions him in the mix.
02:52:15.000 Well, that's unfortunate.
02:52:16.000 He was an early adopter.
02:52:18.000 He was one of the guys in the real early days of MMA. And he was also one of the best.
02:52:24.000 You look at his style of kicking, his kickboxing style.
02:52:28.000 He's one of the best traditional kickboxing style guys that got into MMA. He had a lot of really good skills back then.
02:52:35.000 But the Vanderlei headbutt was a big turning point.
02:52:37.000 I mean, he was doing well in that fight before that happened.
02:52:40.000 Vanderlei headbutted him.
02:52:42.000 I'm not saying he would have won the fight.
02:52:43.000 No.
02:52:43.000 But I'm saying if you take a couple of those controversial decisions and they go the other way, you put them right up there.
02:52:49.000 Right.
02:52:49.000 These guys like Tito and Chuck.
02:52:50.000 I mean, he was doing really well with Chuck.
02:52:53.000 Until he got clipped. 0.99
02:52:55.000 Chuck was a monster. 0.99
02:52:56.000 Back then he was really a monster. 1.00
02:52:58.000 It's interesting because Chuck's style back then was to take shots because his chin was so fucking sturdy. 0.99
02:53:04.000 To take shots and just stay in the pocket and blast you. 0.98
02:53:07.000 And then eventually that gave out.
02:53:09.000 The chin gave out.
02:53:10.000 He's the best example of why you can't fight like that.
02:53:14.000 Like look at a guy who had a chin that was so amazing.
02:53:17.000 But imagine if Chuck...
02:53:18.000 With that chin fought like TJ Dillashaw. 0.96
02:53:22.000 Fought an elusive, fast-moving, fast footwork style where he's very hard to hit, but still had that ridiculous power. 0.76
02:53:29.000 Yeah. 0.86
02:53:29.000 Man. 0.86
02:53:30.000 I mean, obviously they're different weight classes.
02:53:31.000 It would be very difficult for him to move like that.
02:53:34.000 But if you fought a more defensive-oriented style with that punching power and just utilized it sparingly at openings, but...
02:53:41.000 Then he wouldn't have been Chuck Liddell.
02:53:42.000 That and Rashad Knockout is one of the worst I've ever seen.
02:53:45.000 Ooh, terrific.
02:53:46.000 Yeah.
02:53:46.000 Well, the Rich Franklin one was even more disturbing to me because it didn't look like he got hit that hard.
02:53:50.000 And his body was already done. 0.99
02:53:53.000 Yeah, you can only get hit in the butt in so many times. 0.99
02:53:56.000 Sorry, I didn't mean to take you down a rabbit trail with that. 0.99
02:53:58.000 Yeah, no, it's true.
02:53:59.000 It's totally true.
02:54:00.000 It's totally true.
02:54:01.000 And that's one thing that's super important to tell young fighters.
02:54:06.000 I always say that Mighty Mouse is the best.
02:54:08.000 I really think he's the best fighter in the world, pound for pound. 0.99
02:54:10.000 And one of the reasons why is that fucking guy doesn't get hit. 0.98
02:54:13.000 He's so slick, and he moves so well, and he's all about technique. 0.99
02:54:17.000 That's why in his last fight, he goes, look at me, I'm pretty as a motherfucker, and I just fought five rounds. 0.98
02:54:22.000 One thing I will say that bothers me, people go, oh, heavyweights don't have technique. 0.98
02:54:24.000 Here's one thing my dad and I talk about a lot.
02:54:29.000 Sure.
02:54:31.000 Sure.
02:54:33.000 Sure.
02:54:46.000 We're good to go.
02:55:08.000 As someone who comes from a long line of heavyweights, that's the first thing they say if my dad runs over to him, oh, you're just big.
02:55:13.000 Well, it's also the issue with gravity.
02:55:15.000 Like, the heavyweights have to deal with so much more gravity.
02:55:18.000 It's so much harder to move.
02:55:20.000 It's just harder.
02:55:21.000 Well, you can bench 150 all day.
02:55:22.000 Yeah.
02:55:23.000 How often can you bench 275?
02:55:24.000 Exactly.
02:55:25.000 Yeah.
02:55:25.000 A lot.
02:55:25.000 Yeah.
02:55:26.000 Not a lot.
02:55:26.000 Not even Brock Lesnar can do that.
02:55:28.000 Like, it's flyweight.
02:55:29.000 Exactly.
02:55:29.000 And it's also, like, to find a guy who's a heavyweight, like Muhammad Ali, who would move like that, that's one of the reasons why he was such an outlier.
02:55:37.000 Like, nobody had ever seen a heavyweight that could dance like that and move around like that, and, like, no one had prepared for it.
02:55:43.000 Like, Sonny Liston was, like, this plodding, murderous puncher and really had no answer for that style.
02:55:47.000 Right.
02:55:48.000 Because it's not supposed to exist.
02:55:49.000 Like, a guy's not supposed to be that heavy and be able to move that good.
02:55:53.000 Yeah.
02:55:53.000 It's a lot harder.
02:55:55.000 But even him, when he got older, that shit went away too. 0.99
02:55:58.000 And the only thing that I really disagree with you on is, before we leave, you said George St. Pierre, who's the National Treasury about to cross some lines, said that he got out while the wolves were at the door. 0.99
02:56:07.000 Disagree, my friend!
02:56:08.000 Well, you don't think he got out while the wolves were at the door?
02:56:10.000 Look, I think George St. Pierre is amazing.
02:56:11.000 Johnny Hendrix?
02:56:13.000 Well, it's not just Johnny Hendricks.
02:56:15.000 Yes.
02:56:15.000 It's Robbie Lawler.
02:56:16.000 There's a lot of fucking really good fighters. 0.98
02:56:18.000 Robbie Lawler was a champion. 0.99
02:56:20.000 It's not like he ducked them.
02:56:21.000 He's fighting 185. Well, you know, because people take it and they go, he ducked all these good fighters.
02:56:25.000 15 pounds is a lot of weight to give up when you're at an elite level.
02:56:28.000 And he really wasn't a 185-pound guy.
02:56:30.000 He's not even a big 170. He makes weight easily, whereas opposed to, like, Johnny Hendricks can't even fucking make the weight anymore. 0.62
02:56:36.000 They're going to make him go up to 185. Well, Pat's a good friend of mine.
02:56:38.000 He talked about how Lawler would just...
02:56:40.000 Come in, barely warm up, and just fight. 0.94
02:56:42.000 He's an animal.
02:56:42.000 He's not methodical like George St. Pierre.
02:56:45.000 No, but George, I'd like his style better, because George's style is so unpredictable, and I think that he really set the groundwork for...
02:56:53.000 Feras Ahabi is a wizard.
02:56:54.000 He's one of the very best trainers in the world, and Feras...
02:56:57.000 It has like brilliant breakdowns of MMA and brilliant breakdowns of fights and when you talk to him about it and when he talks about training, he talks about overloading guys mind with possibilities and that's what George did. 0.97
02:57:11.000 You never knew what the fuck he was gonna do.
02:57:12.000 You know why his wrestling is so good? 0.95
02:57:13.000 A lot of people don't understand this.
02:57:14.000 There is no wrestling in Canada.
02:57:16.000 Well, he trained with Russian Nationals.
02:57:17.000 He trained with Russian Nationals and the Canadian Olympic team.
02:57:19.000 So it's not like where you have some guy in the UFC who had some high school wrestling experience.
02:57:23.000 Either you don't wrestle, or you wrestle with the best in the entire country.
02:57:27.000 Well, he's also super open-minded.
02:57:29.000 I mean, I did a little bit of training with George, and he just listens to everything and soaks it all in. 0.99
02:57:34.000 And you can see his mind working like a fucking computer. 0.98
02:57:36.000 The way he takes in technique. 0.99
02:57:38.000 And, you know, he did a lot of work with John Donaher on his jiu-jitsu.
02:57:42.000 And he just seeks out people that are going to, like, find...
02:57:45.000 Little things that he can do better, and he listens.
02:57:47.000 He doesn't have an ego about it at all.
02:57:49.000 That's because you don't know how dark it is inside my head.
02:57:53.000 And the alien come to get me occasionally.
02:57:57.000 We've got to get out of here.
02:57:58.000 We're out of time.
02:57:59.000 We're three hours in.
02:58:00.000 This was a lot of fun, man.
02:58:01.000 Thank you very much.
02:58:01.000 If you're in town, we'll do it again, for sure.
02:58:03.000 100%.
02:58:04.000 S. Crowder on Twitter, right?
02:58:06.000 Yeah.
02:58:07.000 Your YouTube page?
02:58:09.000 Our site is louderwithcrowder.com.
02:58:10.000 Louderwithcrowder.com.
02:58:11.000 To win an AR-15. 1.00
02:58:12.000 All right, you fucks. 0.99
02:58:13.000 We'll see you soon. 0.97
02:58:14.000 Thanks, everybody.
02:58:14.000 Bye.
02:58:29.000 you