The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #763 - Action Bronson

00:00:06.000 Yee-haw, ladies and gentlemen. 0.99

00:00:09.000 Yee-fucking-haw. 1.00

00:00:10.000 That's what I have to say to everyone in America. 0.96

00:00:14.000 Dude, when you get to call yourself a name, like Action, like, how dare you, first of all?

00:00:21.000 How dare you be so bold that that's your name, Action?

00:00:24.000 That's my name, man.

00:00:25.000 That's who I am.

00:00:27.000 That's who I was born.

00:00:28.000 How did you get this name, man?

00:00:30.000 Listen, I'm just known to be doing things.

00:00:33.000 I'm just known for things.

00:00:35.000 It's just too cool.

00:00:36.000 It's too cool for a white person. 0.94

00:00:39.000 You know?

00:00:42.000 Dude, I've been watching your stuff on Vice, and first of all, what a great idea. 0.99

00:00:47.000 What a great idea to come up with that hashtag, Fuck That's Delicious. 0.99

00:00:51.000 Thank you, man. 1.00

00:00:52.000 Because your Instagram picture is, it is one big Fuck That's Delicious. 1.00

00:00:56.000 I know, it's crazy. 1.00

00:00:57.000 Your Instagram page, rather.

00:00:58.000 It's awesome.

00:00:59.000 You wouldn't expect it from a rapper slash rapper.

00:01:04.000 Food, traveling, human being such as myself.

00:01:07.000 I would expect exactly that.

00:01:10.000 Yeah?

00:01:10.000 Yeah, that's exactly what I expect from you.

00:01:12.000 All right.

00:01:12.000 Yeah.

00:01:13.000 Good.

00:01:13.000 I think I've got you figured out.

00:01:15.000 You put the thumb on me already? 1.00

00:01:17.000 Shit. 1.00

00:01:18.000 It's a good thing, though. 1.00

00:01:19.000 I'm a fan.

00:01:20.000 I like what you're doing.

00:01:21.000 Well, do you think that people try to define you?

00:01:24.000 Is that what it is?

00:01:24.000 It's like people look at you and they try to dismiss you, or what is it?

00:01:27.000 I don't think they try to dismiss me, but I feel that people try to define you, of course.

00:01:31.000 Put you in a box, right?

00:01:32.000 Of course, but I'm not the one that's ever to be put in a box.

00:01:35.000 There hasn't been any person like me ever, and probably, you know, there will be someone like me coming along, but...

00:01:41.000 Are you the white Kanye?

00:01:43.000 Definitely.

00:01:43.000 I'm the...

00:01:46.000 I'm the slightly tan Ariana Slani, a.k.a.

00:01:51.000 Action Bronson.

00:01:51.000 So you're traveling around.

00:01:53.000 How many of these restaurants are you visiting?

00:01:55.000 How many of these shows are you doing for Vice?

00:01:58.000 We already did eight episodes of the first season.

00:02:00.000 We got picked up for a second.

00:02:02.000 We're going to be doing 12 episodes for the second. 0.99

00:02:04.000 Shit. 0.99

00:02:05.000 I'm trying to sign a long-term deal. 1.00

00:02:08.000 Seven years, $138 million around there.

00:02:11.000 A couple of incentives.

00:02:12.000 Well, it's a great idea, man.

00:02:14.000 In the future, things like what you're getting on Vice.com or these YouTube pages, you can do your own show like that, and it can get gigantic.

00:02:25.000 It can get almost bigger than it could ever get on TV, because you can download it and watch it anytime you want.

00:02:31.000 Well, that's the issue I'm having right now, because we've become such a global show that We're now on Vice's television network that is about to start on March 3rd.

00:02:41.000 I mean on February 29th called Viceland.

00:02:45.000 I have some quarrels about it, to tell you the truth, because it's only going to be in North America.

00:02:51.000 And, I mean, people are going to get what they want.

00:02:54.000 So, obviously, they're going to download it, tour it, whatever they're going to do.

00:02:58.000 But it's necessary for it to be on YouTube.

00:03:01.000 I stress that with every video that I ever do, it is totally necessary to be on YouTube because everyone needs access to it.

00:03:08.000 You can be right here.

00:03:09.000 You want to show me something, boom.

00:03:11.000 Type it right in.

00:03:11.000 You can show it to me.

00:03:12.000 We don't have to go...

00:03:13.000 To the TV, see what time it comes on. 0.99

00:03:16.000 You know, I know they have On Demand, but still, it's a fucking process. 0.99

00:03:20.000 It's easier. 0.98

00:03:21.000 Yeah, it's so universal.

00:03:23.000 It's where everyone goes. 1.00

00:03:25.000 Yeah, it's like you wake up in the morning and you go to YouTube for some shit. 1.00

00:03:28.000 You listen to some music, you put a mix on, you watch some highlights for some shit. 0.99

00:03:33.000 Well, you have it in your TV now. 0.99

00:03:36.000 You know, if you have Apple TV, it's one of the apps.

00:03:38.000 It's just so easy to use.

00:03:40.000 It's pretty much making TV obsolete.

00:03:43.000 Well, between that and Netflix and Hulu and all these different online providers, Where you can access it super easy now on your television.

00:03:52.000 And especially if you have one of those Apple TVs.

00:03:54.000 It's so easy to get...

00:03:56.000 And this is just...

00:03:57.000 What's it going to be like a decade from now, man?

00:04:00.000 I mean, you're going to be able to talk to your TV and say, Action Brunson.

00:04:03.000 And they'll just pull up...

00:04:05.000 What would you like to know?

00:04:07.000 You know? 1.00

00:04:07.000 I would like to listen to his best shit. 1.00

00:04:09.000 That's right. 1.00

00:04:10.000 Bing! 0.98

00:04:10.000 It'll be right there. 0.98

00:04:11.000 His best shit. 1.00

00:04:13.000 Yeah, I mean, it's going to be able to easily decipher what you're saying. 1.00

00:04:18.000 Because right now, they're pretty fucking good. 0.97

00:04:21.000 Have you, like, fucked with Siri at all and asked Siri questions? 0.99

00:04:23.000 Yep. 0.98

00:04:24.000 I mean, it gets pretty next level.

00:04:26.000 This guy right here is like the tech guy, so...

00:04:30.000 I leave it to him. 0.96

00:04:31.000 There's like 7,000 apps and this shit and that. 1.00

00:04:34.000 It's fucking games all day long. 0.99

00:04:36.000 Do you have a flip phone? 1.00

00:04:37.000 I did.

00:04:38.000 Did you really?

00:04:39.000 My first phone was the StarTac.

00:04:40.000 I had one of those too.

00:04:41.000 Motorola StarTac.

00:04:43.000 My friend Ari Shafir went back to the flip phone.

00:04:45.000 Yeah?

00:04:46.000 Yep. 1.00

00:04:46.000 He's like, fuck all you people. 1.00

00:04:48.000 You're losing your mind. 1.00

00:04:49.000 He's a smart dude.

00:04:51.000 He is right. 1.00

00:04:51.000 He's right because I'm a fucking slave. 1.00

00:04:53.000 There's no doubt about that. 1.00

00:04:54.000 I go on.

00:04:55.000 I'm on Twitter.

00:04:56.000 When I wake up, I just put it on to see what the hell's going on.

00:04:59.000 It's upsetting.

00:05:00.000 Everybody's a slave to that thing.

00:05:02.000 That thing's monstrous.

00:05:04.000 But awesome.

00:05:05.000 Right?

00:05:05.000 It's incredible.

00:05:06.000 Well, the amount of data that you can just get...

00:05:09.000 On anything, instantly.

00:05:11.000 Tell me about kettlebells.

00:05:13.000 Tell me about airplane.

00:05:15.000 Who invented the first drone?

00:05:18.000 Just boom, and you just start going through all this.

00:05:21.000 It's like a weird Chinese guy, probably. 1.00

00:05:22.000 Yeah, and we were talking about this yesterday, how a YouTube video now recommends and starts playing the next YouTube video.

00:05:29.000 You just sit there.

00:05:30.000 It's sort of like Netflix does with a series.

00:05:33.000 He'll just start playing the next one. 1.00

00:05:34.000 It's like, sit down, bitch. 1.00

00:05:35.000 Where are you going? 1.00

00:05:36.000 You ain't going to eat.

00:05:37.000 Trapped you.

00:05:37.000 Playing automatically, like, playing for you.

00:05:40.000 And YouTube does that all the time now.

00:05:42.000 Things related.

00:05:43.000 Things that are slightly related.

00:05:45.000 Yeah.

00:05:46.000 You discuss...

00:05:47.000 I mean, just...

00:05:50.000 To make music using YouTube has become a pleasure.

00:05:54.000 It's a new age of digging in the crates. 0.87

00:05:57.000 You have to search pages for rare shit and make sure no one else has used it. 0.97

00:06:04.000 And it's like a never-ending catalog of musical talent from all over the globe. 0.98

00:06:12.000 Yeah.

00:06:13.000 It's unbelievable.

00:06:14.000 From the early opera singers. 1.00

00:06:16.000 Shit, from... 1.00

00:06:16.000 You can listen to anything. 1.00

00:06:17.000 From any...

00:06:18.000 They have, from the early 1900s, the first recordings somehow.

00:06:23.000 That's insane.

00:06:24.000 You know?

00:06:25.000 Yeah, it's insane to think that they figured out how to put sound on a black plastic disc that made it so awesome.

00:06:35.000 And they figured out how to do that when we were apes, you know?

00:06:39.000 I mean, people were, like, in comparison to today, like, the amount of technology they had then, this is like the early 1800s they figured out how to do that, right?

00:06:47.000 Like, what year was it they invented the phonograph record player?

00:06:51.000 Remember they used to have that big hoop?

00:06:53.000 Yeah, the hoop.

00:06:53.000 The big, like, tuba?

00:06:55.000 And you'd just fucking turn it. 0.99

00:06:56.000 And you would sit on it and the sound would come off the record through that tuba thing? 0.99

00:07:00.000 Yeah, they had something before that I was looking up right now.

00:07:03.000 In 1877, Edison had this thing that they recorded on tinfoil.

00:07:06.000 I'll show you what it looks like.

00:07:07.000 Whoa.

00:07:09.000 So when...

00:07:09.000 I feel like we're...

00:07:11.000 It's all cylinders.

00:07:12.000 There's a video from, like, Tech TV where some guy drops one and it's like an old viral video from the early 2000s.

00:07:18.000 Wow.

00:07:18.000 Jesus Christ.

00:07:19.000 He dropped it and broke it?

00:07:20.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:07:20.000 Oh, you fuckhead. 1.00

00:07:23.000 What a fucking asshole. 1.00

00:07:28.000 Wow. 1.00

00:07:30.000 It's unbelievable.

00:07:32.000 It says it's a cornet solo on a wax cylinder. 0.99

00:07:36.000 Well, if that was done today, I'd want my fucking money back. 1.00

00:07:39.000 I'd be like, you shitty audio engineer. 0.99

00:07:42.000 What did you keep your phone in your pocket and record it from there? 0.97

00:07:46.000 But listening to that, when you consider the time, it sounds amazing.

00:07:50.000 So what was the first phonograph?

00:07:51.000 What year was that invented?

00:07:54.000 Why do I feel like it was the 1800s?

00:07:56.000 Am I wrong, or is it way earlier than that?

00:07:58.000 I think it was at the end of the 1800s.

00:08:00.000 The end of it.

00:08:02.000 They used to look so wild with that big tube thing that came out of it.

00:08:07.000 But they haven't really figured out how to make it sound better than the record does.

00:08:11.000 No?

00:08:11.000 What is the difference?

00:08:12.000 Because some people say it's bullshit. 0.99

00:08:13.000 Some people say it's just fetishism. 0.99

00:08:16.000 And some people who are real audiophile type...

00:08:20.000 They all kind of agree there's like a different kind of sound.

00:08:24.000 Well, what everyone explains to me and now I understand is a warmth.

00:08:28.000 Yeah.

00:08:29.000 There's a warmth to it. 0.99

00:08:30.000 You know, it's easier on the ear than, say, the electronic music and the digital shit of today. 0.99

00:08:36.000 It's a little bit more harsh. 0.80

00:08:38.000 The older stuff was toned better, and I don't know, just the plastic, the vinyl does something...

00:08:45.000 Something to it.

00:08:45.000 The people that are real, like, audio freaks all seem to agree on that, right?

00:08:50.000 For sure.

00:08:50.000 There's something about tape.

00:08:52.000 Recording directly to two-inch tape.

00:08:55.000 Using this thing, this big machine.

00:08:58.000 Nowadays, we just go right into the computer through whatever, I don't know what the fuck, like an M-box or...

00:09:06.000 So Jamie, you're one of the people that doesn't think it makes so much of a difference, right?

00:09:10.000 At this point, it's what you're hearing.

00:09:13.000 So people today are trained to hear things off of iPhones and iTunes, like MP3s.

00:09:19.000 That compression, we're used to hearing it.

00:09:21.000 So being told that something else sounds better...

00:09:24.000 It's like you're trying to tell them.

00:09:26.000 It's all about the compression.

00:09:28.000 The compression makes everything sound full and smooth.

00:09:32.000 Is it possible it's a more familiar sound?

00:09:34.000 Is that why it's...

00:09:35.000 Sort of, yeah.

00:09:36.000 They're even mixing things now.

00:09:37.000 You'll see it's mastered for iTunes.

00:09:39.000 It's mastered to be heard through those little two earbuds, not through a giant sound system at home, through giant speakers with subwoofers and whatnot.

00:09:46.000 Absolutely correct.

00:09:47.000 Interesting.

00:09:48.000 Interesting.

00:09:49.000 Everything is more personal now.

00:09:50.000 No one ever drives down the street anymore blasting the music. 0.99

00:09:54.000 What the fuck happened to that? 0.97

00:09:57.000 You know? 1.00

00:09:58.000 You used to go, when you got the car, you used to have to go and buy the humongous speakers to put in the bitch. 1.00

00:10:03.000 I think people started going deaf. 0.99

00:10:05.000 Whatever.

00:10:07.000 Whatever.

00:10:08.000 If you're driving around with earplugs on and you're blasting music, it's kind of a douche move.

00:10:14.000 If it's so bad it hurts your ears, you have to put earplugs in? 0.98

00:10:16.000 There's this guy in my neighborhood that just drives around every Sunday in a piece of shit Cadillac with a bow on the front, playing all types of Frankie Valli at the loudest volume that could possibly be and just singing along. 0.98

00:10:29.000 It's incredible. 0.99

00:10:31.000 It's his ritual every Sunday.

00:10:33.000 You really are right because it used to be like every stoplight you would hear...

00:10:40.000 You'd feel like your car vibrate.

00:10:43.000 Those people that go crazy with the subwoofers to the point where you feel it in the air around you. 0.99

00:10:48.000 Fucking mirrors are rattling. 1.00

00:10:50.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:10:51.000 I love it.

00:10:51.000 Do you love it?

00:10:52.000 Nah, I don't.

00:10:53.000 It's terrible.

00:10:55.000 Have you ever been in a vehicle with the ship turned up all the way?

00:10:59.000 Yes. 1.00

00:10:59.000 If you sit in the back seat where the subwoofer is, It feels like it's coming through your chest, like your fucking heart is about to explode with that bass. 1.00

00:11:08.000 Yeah. 0.98

00:11:09.000 Especially if you play like Dipset or something, like some sort of EDM, you know, like some crazy house music.

00:11:18.000 You literally go through a trance.

00:11:20.000 Well, you know what else went out?

00:11:21.000 Dudes with the crazy wagon rims.

00:11:25.000 Those wagon wheel rims.

00:11:27.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:11:27.000 Everybody was like, how many potholes are we going to hit?

00:11:30.000 Yeah, now the rims.

00:11:31.000 You can't have a 28 inch rim. 0.99

00:11:33.000 What the fuck is this? 1.00

00:11:35.000 These ridiculous rims. 1.00

00:11:36.000 Tires are like a piece of bubble gum. 0.94

00:11:38.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:11:39.000 The run flats.

00:11:41.000 Thinnos. 0.60

00:11:42.000 I can't do it, man.

00:11:43.000 I got some Schmitts on my car.

00:11:45.000 What's a Schmitt? 0.99

00:11:46.000 There's some German rims that you could fucking... 1.00

00:11:48.000 The tank could roll over them shits and they'll be alright. 0.99

00:11:51.000 You can literally drive the car without rubber wheels on it, just on the rims.

00:11:56.000 What?

00:11:56.000 Yeah.

00:11:57.000 What kind of wheels are these?

00:11:59.000 They were Schmitts. 0.94

00:12:00.000 You could look them up.

00:12:01.000 Wow.

00:12:01.000 There's a Schmitt...

00:12:03.000 That's crazy.

00:12:04.000 Yeah, some sort of...

00:12:04.000 You can drive them on the road?

00:12:06.000 Yeah, those over there on the left.

00:12:09.000 Yep, those.

00:12:11.000 What kind of car do you have, man?

00:12:13.000 A BMW Wagon 5 Series 95. That's a nice...

00:12:20.000 Those years are like the nicest years.

00:12:24.000 Yeah, for sure.

00:12:24.000 BMW M5s and the 5 Series.

00:12:27.000 I love those.

00:12:28.000 Doesn't Tony have one of those?

00:12:30.000 Hinchcliffe has one of those?

00:12:32.000 They say that like the 5 Series BMW from like...

00:12:38.000 There's like two eras.

00:12:40.000 Like there's the one they have now, the one they had before, and then the one they had before that.

00:12:44.000 And that's where you're at?

00:12:45.000 Yeah, the 95 one is the one right before they change the body. 0.94

00:12:50.000 Yeah, those are like classic cars, man.

00:12:53.000 Tony has a 5 Series from there, and I have another friend who has a 3 Series from there.

00:12:58.000 Like, those cars were something special, man.

00:13:00.000 They just figured out a way to make them...

00:13:02.000 They handle so good.

00:13:04.000 They brake so good.

00:13:05.000 They're the right amount of weight.

00:13:06.000 They're not too heavy.

00:13:08.000 Exactly.

00:13:08.000 You get, like, good movement with them.

00:13:10.000 And they're metal.

00:13:11.000 Yeah, look at that thing. 0.99

00:13:12.000 They're fucking metal. 0.99

00:13:13.000 Exactly. 0.99

00:13:14.000 That's the M5 from that era.

00:13:15.000 Yeah, it's a beauty.

00:13:16.000 That's just...

00:13:16.000 That car was a piece of genius.

00:13:18.000 That's a beauty, right? 0.99

00:13:19.000 There's a fucking crazy video that someone put out that I could barely watch, man. 1.00

00:13:24.000 It's some asshole in some other country. 1.00

00:13:26.000 I don't know what country he's in, but he's in an M5, one of those, that series, and he's driving through traffic. 1.00

00:13:32.000 Like a fucking maniac. 1.00

00:13:34.000 Like, you watch it, you just go, Jesus! 1.00

00:13:37.000 You're holding onto the chair, right?

00:13:38.000 He burns it into the oncoming lane, cuts in front of people. 0.99

00:13:41.000 I mean, he is doing some fucking crazy shit really fast, but driving like a wizard. 0.98

00:13:47.000 Like, going around corners sideways. 0.99

00:13:48.000 He must be a race car driver.

00:13:50.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:13:50.000 There's no way he's not a race car driver.

00:13:52.000 Oh, this is it.

00:13:53.000 Jesus Christ, Jamie!

00:13:54.000 How dare you! 1.00

00:13:56.000 This motherfucker is nuts. 1.00

00:13:58.000 Look at this. 1.00

00:13:59.000 Damn. 1.00

00:13:59.000 Watch this. 1.00

00:14:00.000 Look at this. 1.00

00:14:01.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

00:14:01.000 He's just drifting? 1.00

00:14:02.000 Yeah.

00:14:03.000 He's drifting.

00:14:04.000 Oh, that's a beauty, too.

00:14:05.000 He's going around people.

00:14:06.000 I mean, look how he's driving.

00:14:08.000 Where is this? 1.00

00:14:09.000 This fucking guy's speeding while people are walking across the road, and he doesn't give a fuck. 1.00

00:14:12.000 Look at this. 1.00

00:14:13.000 Oncoming. 1.00

00:14:13.000 Doesn't give a fuck. 1.00

00:14:16.000 This guy is fucking crazy. 1.00

00:14:18.000 Look at this shit. 1.00

00:14:18.000 He's out of his mind. 1.00

00:14:19.000 He's killing it. 0.97

00:14:19.000 Look at this. 0.97

00:14:21.000 Where is this?

00:14:22.000 Austria?

00:14:23.000 I don't know where it is.

00:14:24.000 They have those crazy long European license plates, though. 1.00

00:14:27.000 But look at the way this motherfucker drives! 1.00

00:14:31.000 What is this, Jamie? 1.00

00:14:32.000 It's for people if they want to watch it.

00:14:35.000 BMW M5, need4drive.com, last illegal street racing and drift driver, Giorgio Tevzadzi.

00:14:46.000 Oh, yeah, he just died.

00:14:47.000 Look at this.

00:14:48.000 Did he?

00:14:49.000 Yeah, he just died, I think. 1.00

00:14:50.000 He just did some crazy shit in the whip. 1.00

00:14:51.000 He died in this car, actually. 1.00

00:14:53.000 Come on.

00:14:54.000 Check it out.

00:14:54.000 Oh, my God.

00:14:55.000 I think it's R.I.P. Giorgio.

00:14:56.000 How do you say his name again?

00:14:58.000 Giorgio Tevzadzi.

00:15:01.000 Tevzadzi.

00:15:02.000 Yeah, Giorgio Tevzadzi.

00:15:04.000 I think he's dead.

00:15:06.000 R.I.P. There he is.

00:15:08.000 I saw he died in the Burgundy Beamer.

00:15:10.000 Jesus Christ.

00:15:11.000 He died in the Burgundy M5. Infamous BMW street drifter dies in crash.

00:15:17.000 Outside the Barclays?

00:15:18.000 Oh no. 1.00

00:15:19.000 Holy shit. 1.00

00:15:21.000 He was 26 years old. 1.00

00:15:22.000 Yep. 0.99

00:15:24.000 What a nut, man. 0.96

00:15:29.000 Wow, he wasn't Those driver appears to be fine. 0.98

00:15:44.000 Oh, he wasn't driving. 1.00

00:15:45.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

00:15:46.000 That is ironic. 1.00

00:15:49.000 No, it's not.

00:15:50.000 That's like a Lance Morissette ironic.

00:15:53.000 Isn't it ironic?

00:15:55.000 That's not ironic. 0.99

00:15:56.000 But it's kind of fucked. 0.99

00:15:59.000 You know, like, Kinnison was killed by a drunk driver. 0.99

00:16:01.000 And Kinnison used to have those bits about drinking and driving.

00:16:05.000 You know, they were We're gonna do it!

00:16:06.000 We're gonna drink!

00:16:07.000 We're gonna drive!

00:16:08.000 We're gonna pull it off!

00:16:09.000 You know what? 1.00

00:16:09.000 We do it every fucking night! 1.00

00:16:13.000 The crowd would go crazy and people would get so mad. 1.00

00:16:15.000 They were like, this guy is encouraging drunk driving. 1.00

00:16:18.000 Like, what the fuck? 1.00

00:16:19.000 And then, boom, he gets killed by a drunk driver. 1.00

00:16:22.000 Fucking karma. 1.00

00:16:25.000 Yeah, I don't know if karma's real, but God damn, there's a lot of evidence out there. 0.99

00:16:28.000 You know, it's just a saying. 0.94

00:16:29.000 You know, one of those things, like I swear to God, it ain't real, but it's one of those things, like an American slang word. 1.00

00:16:39.000 Karma is a motherfucker, though. 0.99

00:16:41.000 It is. 1.00

00:16:42.000 And that statement, karma is a motherfucker, is one of the best statements. 1.00

00:16:47.000 As far as when shit goes down like that, you're like, man. 1.00

00:16:52.000 But, you know... 0.99

00:16:54.000 Nobody wishes that on somebody.

00:16:56.000 Especially if you're a driver and you're like... 0.99

00:16:58.000 He's probably like, bitch, this would have never happened if I was at the wheel. 1.00

00:17:01.000 Never. 1.00

00:17:02.000 Fucking Georgie. 1.00

00:17:03.000 The way that guy drived? 1.00

00:17:05.000 That was insane.

00:17:06.000 I mean, it's horrific to watch.

00:17:09.000 Definitely shouldn't be allowed to do it.

00:17:11.000 What about the videos... 1.00

00:17:13.000 Of the fucking Russian dudes climbing the buildings. 0.99

00:17:16.000 I was just gonna say something about that. 1.00

00:17:18.000 Some new dude.

00:17:20.000 I put one up on my Instagram page.

00:17:22.000 I put like two of them in a row. 0.98

00:17:23.000 They were fucking freaking me out. 0.93

00:17:25.000 And this dude contacted me through Twitter and said hi. 0.98

00:17:30.000 His stunts are...

00:17:32.000 He's insane.

00:17:33.000 And he's got YouTube videos of these things too. 0.99

00:17:36.000 They're insane. 0.98

00:17:37.000 He's on like the Eiffel Tower or some shit, right? 0.99

00:17:39.000 Oh, I saw that one. 0.96

00:17:40.000 Is that in Paris that he's on the top of that tower? 0.97

00:17:44.000 He's insane. 1.00

00:17:45.000 It makes your fucking palms sweat. 1.00

00:17:46.000 Oh my god. 1.00

00:17:47.000 It's like, what the fuck? 1.00

00:17:48.000 Dude, it makes every fucking cell on your body just starts vibrating like, get away from the head! 1.00

00:17:54.000 Get away! 1.00

00:17:57.000 It's heavy.

00:17:58.000 I don't get that, man.

00:18:00.000 If I was in that shape, I probably would try it too.

00:18:03.000 Would you really?

00:18:04.000 Yeah, but they're in crazy shape.

00:18:06.000 You see them doing pull-ups and...

00:18:08.000 Look at this.

00:18:09.000 Oh my god.

00:18:11.000 Oh my god.

00:18:12.000 Oh, this is in New York, I guess?

00:18:14.000 Is this New York?

00:18:15.000 Dubai?

00:18:15.000 Yeah, it looks like Dubai.

00:18:16.000 Oh my god, look at the edge.

00:18:20.000 This is not good.

00:18:23.000 James Kingston's his name. 0.99

00:18:25.000 He's crazy. 0.99

00:18:26.000 American dude? 1.00

00:18:30.000 You know what a guy like this?

00:18:31.000 I would just like for him to just retire right now.

00:18:33.000 Look, he did it.

00:18:34.000 Congratulations.

00:18:34.000 Let's not keep doing this.

00:18:36.000 Let's just not keep doing this. 1.00

00:18:37.000 Look at this fuck. 1.00

00:18:39.000 Oh my God, look at this dude. 1.00

00:18:42.000 Oh my God, he's doing chin-ups on this thing.

00:18:44.000 Oh my God, he's one-handing it.

00:18:47.000 Dude, please stop.

00:18:48.000 I can't do this.

00:18:49.000 I can't do this. 1.00

00:18:50.000 Oh fucking Christ. 1.00

00:18:53.000 Oh my God. 0.98

00:18:55.000 Dude, dude, [...

00:19:00.000 Okay.

00:19:01.000 For people who are...

00:19:02.000 The description is like...

00:19:03.000 The James Kingston on Instagram.

00:19:06.000 That's his page.

00:19:07.000 And I... Don't feel so good.

00:19:10.000 The way he was holding on the floor was a thick-ass bar.

00:19:14.000 He's with one arm.

00:19:16.000 He's hanging with one arm.

00:19:17.000 He's like a mile in the sky.

00:19:21.000 Dude, stop it, Jamie.

00:19:23.000 Stop it.

00:19:23.000 I can't do it.

00:19:25.000 Stop.

00:19:25.000 Cut it off.

00:19:28.000 Fuck, man. 1.00

00:19:31.000 Flat-footed? 1.00

00:19:32.000 Word?

00:19:33.000 Oh my god.

00:19:35.000 He just jumped from one building to another.

00:19:39.000 Look at this.

00:19:39.000 Not even a running start.

00:19:44.000 This is insane.

00:19:46.000 That is insane.

00:19:48.000 How does he do that?

00:19:50.000 Like, I would splatter.

00:19:51.000 I would never make it that far.

00:19:53.000 How's he making it that far?

00:19:55.000 He had some good thrust.

00:19:57.000 The momentum and the thrust.

00:19:58.000 But that seems like an insane amount of distance to travel, doesn't it? 0.98

00:20:03.000 How the fuck does he judge that? 0.98

00:20:05.000 How does he jump and land like that? 1.00

00:20:08.000 You got a crazier one?

00:20:09.000 Look at Jamie's face.

00:20:10.000 Look at this.

00:20:11.000 Look at this.

00:20:13.000 Oh, there's no way.

00:20:20.000 He just jumps across a building.

00:20:23.000 How is that possible, man?

00:20:27.000 How is that possible?

00:20:28.000 And this is one of his favorite jumps in the city, apparently.

00:20:36.000 Come on, son.

00:20:37.000 You know, like, this doesn't make any sense.

00:20:41.000 At the end of the day, man.

00:20:42.000 How is that possible?

00:20:44.000 If I could, I would.

00:20:46.000 It's like when skateboarding, like, once Tony Hawk does the 900, once you see it done, everyone else can just start doing it.

00:20:53.000 But I just look, I'm shocked by the distance he's covering.

00:20:57.000 I guess what's going on is the distance of one building, it's far away, but it's also higher.

00:21:05.000 So in his leap, if he gets a good spring, his arc will carry him over.

00:21:10.000 But he's got to judge that perfectly.

00:21:14.000 There's no room for error whatsoever.

00:21:17.000 This is what it looks like sideways? 0.99

00:21:18.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

00:21:20.000 Look how far he's jumping, man. 1.00

00:21:22.000 That's insane.

00:21:23.000 That's an insane amount of space he's covering when he lands on that edge.

00:21:28.000 Like, that kid, he must be like, I mean, I don't know how much he weighs, but he must be insanely strong for his weight, and he can just throw his body through the air like that. 0.88

00:21:38.000 He must have just a ridiculous explosion out of his legs. 0.83

00:21:42.000 And then land so lightly? 0.99

00:21:44.000 That's freakish. 1.00

00:21:46.000 Shit. 1.00

00:21:47.000 I guess it's those things, like if you just concentrate on only doing that, you can do it in a way that doesn't make sense to someone like you, or me, or, you know... 1.00

00:21:57.000 I can't even ice-skate.

00:22:00.000 Are you serious?

00:22:02.000 I can't ice-skate at all. 1.00

00:22:03.000 What the fuck? 0.99

00:22:07.000 I can ice skate incredibly, man. 1.00

00:22:09.000 I'm fucking 285 on a good day. 0.97

00:22:13.000 First of all, I can't find shoot when I don't have my own ice skates, so I have to rent ice skates. 0.98

00:22:18.000 It's for the same reason why I couldn't ski for years. 0.99

00:22:21.000 The rentals are fucking shitty. 0.99

00:22:22.000 Well, it's not even just that. 1.00

00:22:24.000 My feet are too wide.

00:22:25.000 So if I had a regular size 11, my feet... 1.00

00:22:27.000 Someone in my background fucked a monkey. 0.99

00:22:30.000 I don't know when it was. 1.00

00:22:31.000 Big fucking Bigfoot foot. 0.99

00:22:33.000 A long time ago. 1.00

00:22:34.000 Like when you shouldn't be able to fuck monkeys anymore, someone just went back in for one more shot and fucked a monkey. 1.00

00:22:40.000 Guaranteed. 1.00

00:22:41.000 It was like the last call for evolution.

00:22:46.000 And one of my ancestors just snuck back in and got one more nut off.

00:22:50.000 But...

00:22:51.000 My feet are just too wide.

00:22:53.000 So I get in those things.

00:22:54.000 I'm just in agony.

00:22:55.000 And I just never learn how.

00:22:56.000 And I'm not going to...

00:22:57.000 It's not interesting enough for me to go out and buy ice skates.

00:23:00.000 You know, if I was like, this is it.

00:23:02.000 This is something I have to conquer.

00:23:03.000 Then I would have to learn how to ice skate.

00:23:06.000 It was much more exciting as a youth.

00:23:08.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:23:09.000 Fucking roller... 1.00

00:23:10.000 Like, not rollerblading. 1.00

00:23:11.000 Fucking ice skating to Green Day. 1.00

00:23:14.000 Shit like that. 1.00

00:23:15.000 You know what I mean? 1.00

00:23:17.000 That's right.

00:23:18.000 They play loud music and you spin around the ice.

00:23:20.000 Yeah.

00:23:22.000 See, I guess hockey would be the reason to do it.

00:23:26.000 Like, if you wanted to learn how to play hockey.

00:23:28.000 Well, I'm saying you pretend you're doing hockey moves, you know, like you're on the ice, snowing, when you're stopping, you throw the snow at people, you know the shh.

00:23:37.000 Right.

00:23:37.000 That's a cool move.

00:23:38.000 Yeah, exactly.

00:23:39.000 So it's like, you wear the hockey skates, you definitely don't wear the figure skating ones.

00:23:43.000 Mmm.

00:23:44.000 No chance.

00:23:45.000 No, you don't.

00:23:46.000 What's the difference?

00:23:47.000 Well, they have the spikes in the front so you can do the triple toe lutz.

00:23:50.000 Mmm.

00:23:51.000 You don't want anybody seeing your spikes.

00:23:55.000 When you go straight, you have to lift a little bit and you're gonna fall on your face.

00:24:00.000 The hockey is a little curvature like a running shoe.

00:24:03.000 Mmm.

00:24:04.000 It just allows you to maneuver through the ice.

00:24:07.000 So it allows you to maneuver better, but it doesn't allow you to do tricks.

00:24:11.000 You can't do a stop and then triple toe lutz or like a Scott Hamilton flip.

00:24:16.000 So are they doing flips when they do those spins on the ice?

00:24:20.000 Are they doing them with like special skates?

00:24:22.000 Is that what the deal is?

00:24:22.000 For sure.

00:24:23.000 Brian Boitano.

00:24:26.000 Do you remember South Park?

00:24:28.000 Of course.

00:24:28.000 What would Brian Boitano do?

00:24:30.000 Oh my God.

00:24:31.000 Love it.

00:24:32.000 That was like one of their first episodes, right?

00:24:34.000 Was it their first one?

00:24:35.000 God, that was funny, man.

00:24:37.000 That was going around as a VHS tape back in the day.

00:24:41.000 That was one of those things where a buddy of mine said, you have to see this.

00:24:45.000 Check this out.

00:24:46.000 These guys made this video.

00:24:48.000 It was Jesus and Brian Boitano, right?

00:24:51.000 Mm-hmm.

00:24:52.000 Who else was in it?

00:24:54.000 Santa.

00:24:54.000 Santa, that's right.

00:24:56.000 Whatever it was, it was fucking hilarious. 0.96

00:24:59.000 And it was way before its time, you know? 0.83

00:25:03.000 What was the year the first South Park tape was made?

00:25:08.000 When you find out how long those guys have been around...

00:25:10.000 This was made in 1992. Jesus Christ.

00:25:13.000 Dude.

00:25:14.000 They've been killing it since 92. 92. Southpaw came out in 92?

00:25:19.000 Well, no.

00:25:20.000 The Spirit of Christmas is what that was called.

00:25:22.000 I think that show came out in like 97. Okay, yeah.

00:25:25.000 Did it come out that much later?

00:25:26.000 Really?

00:25:26.000 I think so.

00:25:27.000 God, it was so funny.

00:25:28.000 Maybe 96. I must have got it after.

00:25:30.000 If they did it in 92, I didn't move here until 94, and I know that I got it when I was living in Encino, because I remember popping it in when a friend came over.

00:25:40.000 It was amazing.

00:25:42.000 You had a bar here to lend you the tape?

00:25:44.000 Somebody gave it to me.

00:25:45.000 I don't remember how I got the tape, but I remember somebody gave it to me and said, you got to watch this, and then I remember popping it in a VCR for my friend.

00:25:53.000 It was so ridiculous.

00:25:56.000 It was super funny. 0.99

00:25:58.000 It was really crude.

00:25:59.000 I almost wish he would go back to doing it this way, you know?

00:26:03.000 Because it was so obvious that it was, you know, just really shitty animation.

00:26:09.000 Like, look at the mouth movements.

00:26:11.000 It's still shitty, but it's more sophisticated now, right? 0.99

00:26:14.000 It's sophisticated shitty. 0.99

00:26:16.000 Yeah. 0.97

00:26:17.000 I mean, this is... 0.72

00:26:18.000 I bet the amount of time it took to do this was probably ridiculous, though.

00:26:23.000 You know, like the Team America, I think he said he would never do one of those movies again because it was just way too time consuming. 0.98

00:26:31.000 I mean, it was a pretty incredible fucking movie. 0.95

00:26:35.000 It's one of my favorites ever. 0.98

00:26:36.000 Yeah, it was one of my all-time favorites.

00:26:39.000 We were talking about movies that are funnier than Tropic Thunder.

00:26:43.000 And it's probably none are funnier in moments.

00:26:48.000 It's as funny as a movie gets.

00:26:50.000 But there's other really funny movies too.

00:26:52.000 You think that's the funniest of all time?

00:26:55.000 It's one of the funniest. 1.00

00:26:58.000 It's a stupid funny movie. 1.00

00:27:01.000 But Team America. 1.00

00:27:02.000 Team America, too.

00:27:03.000 Zoolander's really funny. 0.99

00:27:05.000 Yeah, there's a lot of fucking Talladega knights. 0.98

00:27:08.000 I lost all credibility right there, Jamie. 1.00

00:27:10.000 When I first saw fucking Borat, I pretty much shit my pants. 1.00

00:27:14.000 Yeah, Borat. 1.00

00:27:15.000 Even Bruno.

00:27:16.000 I didn't see Bruno.

00:27:18.000 I still haven't seen it.

00:27:19.000 My Albanian father. 1.00

00:27:21.000 My fucking Albanian father, immigrant, hard head, like, only knows one way. 1.00

00:27:29.000 Neanderthal, thinks that's one of the fucking funniest movies ever. 1.00

00:27:33.000 You know what I mean? 0.98

00:27:34.000 It's just weird.

00:27:35.000 It's a crossover hit.

00:27:37.000 You know what's an underrated funny movie?

00:27:40.000 And Adam Sandler's Don't Mess With a Zohan. 1.00

00:27:43.000 Oh yeah, that one's a good one too.

00:27:44.000 Underrated funny movie, man.

00:27:46.000 Because a lot of people, they put Adam Sandler movies into a category.

00:27:51.000 Sometimes they can get a little dismissive of an Adam Sandler movie.

00:27:55.000 But that Don't Mess With the Zohan is a classic. 0.98

00:27:57.000 That was a good one.

00:27:58.000 Yeah.

00:28:00.000 So tell me how your show works, man.

00:28:02.000 Do you just decide where you want to go?

00:28:04.000 Does somebody else suggest where to go?

00:28:06.000 Well, a lot of the times it's...

00:28:08.000 I go on tour for my music...

00:28:10.000 And then while we're there, we end up shooting the show. 0.98

00:28:13.000 If that's not the case, I just tell them, listen, I want to go to fucking Sicily. 0.97

00:28:18.000 And then we're in Sicily, you know? 0.99

00:28:20.000 It's that simple.

00:28:22.000 And we just, I bring my boys with me and we just go in.

00:28:26.000 They put the camera on and we just act how we act.

00:28:29.000 So it'll be us.

00:28:31.000 Wow.

00:28:32.000 Then you just get to pick where you're eating and just showcase different chefs.

00:28:37.000 You were a chef at one point too?

00:28:38.000 I was.

00:28:39.000 That's how I really started.

00:28:42.000 When I was like 18, I went to culinary school and fucked off after that for about a year and a half or two and had a child and went back into the kitchen to start working and that was just it. 0.95

00:28:56.000 I thought I was just going to be a fucking short order cook or a chef or whatever for the rest of my life. 0.97

00:29:01.000 Out of nowhere, I broke my leg, just slipped on the floor, broke my leg. 0.97

00:29:07.000 I was working a little bit with music before that, but not in any capacity where I thought it would be where I am now. 0.99

00:29:15.000 And shit, here we are. 0.97

00:29:18.000 That took me out of the kitchen professionally, put me in a recording studio all the time. 1.00

00:29:24.000 That's crazy.

00:29:25.000 Yeah.

00:29:25.000 A fall changed your destiny.

00:29:27.000 Straight up.

00:29:28.000 Broke my right leg, my right ankle from a slip.

00:29:31.000 A very, like, I've slipped much worse.

00:29:35.000 That's crazy.

00:29:36.000 I've done much worse than myself and this one just...

00:29:39.000 Just cracked.

00:29:40.000 Cracked it.

00:29:41.000 That's so interesting how something like that can happen or something that looks like a bad thing that happened to you turned into like this amazing door that opened up.

00:29:50.000 Yep.

00:29:50.000 Then all of a sudden you could do what you really want to do.

00:29:55.000 This is what I wanted to do my whole life.

00:29:57.000 Nothing.

00:29:57.000 It's just what I wanted to do.

00:30:02.000 What is this?

00:30:03.000 We're watching Jamie.

00:30:04.000 Niam Jam?

00:30:05.000 What is that?

00:30:05.000 This is me in Jamaica.

00:30:09.000 I went down here to do...

00:30:11.000 What did I go down here to do?

00:30:13.000 I went down here to do some sort of exhibition with Mario Batali, but he was in no condition to do anything with me that day, so I ended up just hanging out pretty much at the beach the whole time. 0.90

00:30:24.000 Oh, so you were supposed to hang out with Mario and he got fucked up? 0.94

00:30:28.000 Pretty much. 0.94

00:30:29.000 I was hanging out with him, but we were just sitting at the bar, hanging.

00:30:33.000 He was, you know, he was doing well.

00:30:36.000 He just didn't feel like doing anything.

00:30:38.000 He just wanted to hang out.

00:30:39.000 The weather was too good.

00:30:40.000 Oh, I get it.

00:30:42.000 The weather was just too beautiful.

00:30:43.000 So he just didn't want to participate in a show?

00:30:46.000 Well, nah, not this one.

00:30:48.000 Just in the entire...

00:30:51.000 Events of the thing.

00:30:52.000 I feel like we're dancing around this story.

00:30:54.000 Yeah, nah, he was...

00:30:55.000 Bottom line is...

00:30:57.000 I don't want to push you on anything. 0.99

00:30:58.000 Bottom line, I was fucking... 0.99

00:30:59.000 I ate a macaroon, like one of these edibles. 0.99

00:31:03.000 Oh.

00:31:03.000 And I was just demolished walking around.

00:31:06.000 Did Mario get demolished too?

00:31:07.000 Nah, Mario doesn't get demolished.

00:31:09.000 That's too bad.

00:31:09.000 He just drinks wine.

00:31:11.000 That's too bad.

00:31:11.000 Yeah.

00:31:12.000 He's missing out.

00:31:13.000 He is.

00:31:14.000 I think that he's had his share.

00:31:15.000 You think so?

00:31:16.000 I would say.

00:31:16.000 You think he's done?

00:31:17.000 I would say. 1.00

00:31:18.000 I gotta get back to the fucking kitchen. 1.00

00:31:20.000 I gotta cook the shit out of some food. 1.00

00:31:22.000 I don't have time for these deep soul-searching weed trips. 0.98

00:31:25.000 Nah, he's just hanging out, man.

00:31:27.000 He's just living his life. 1.00

00:31:28.000 He's like a fucking superstar. 1.00

00:31:30.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:31:30.000 He's a rock star, that guy. 1.00

00:31:32.000 The world of chefs is a very different world.

00:31:35.000 And when I was younger, I didn't really appreciate it as an art form.

00:31:39.000 I think I just thought of it as more like just a cool thing that someone knows how to make really good food because you can go to that restaurant and you can get it there.

00:31:50.000 I didn't think of who is the creator of that food and what is that.

00:31:54.000 Is that an art form?

00:31:55.000 Because I think it really definitely is.

00:31:57.000 100%.

00:31:59.000 Guys like you and, like, you look like a chef, which is like you're all tattooed up.

00:32:05.000 Like, a lot of chefs...

00:32:06.000 That's today's chef.

00:32:07.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:32:08.000 That's today's chef.

00:32:09.000 They look like they could be artists.

00:32:10.000 Yeah, for sure.

00:32:11.000 Well, that's today's chefs. 1.00

00:32:12.000 Today's chefs are, you know, young, crazy, tattooed motherfuckers. 0.99

00:32:18.000 You can't really call who's the chef, you know, but a classic chef is usually the French guy with the handkerchief around his neck and the big hat. 0.99

00:32:27.000 It's not like that anymore.

00:32:28.000 The chefs are now rock stars.

00:32:30.000 Well, they definitely have become...

00:32:32.000 I think a lot of it's because of Bourdain's show.

00:32:34.000 They've definitely become more highlighted in that regard. 0.96

00:32:37.000 In his show, he's always interviewing these weird, funky people in Portland that are raising their own chickens and shit, and farm-to-table type restaurants. 0.74

00:32:47.000 He'll hang out with a lot of weird, experimental chef people, and a lot of them look like you. 0.96

00:32:53.000 Yeah, no, that's a good thing.

00:32:55.000 He definitely opened the door for a lot of people, but I feel like the celebrity chef started with Emeril Lagasse and people like that, like earlier with like...

00:33:03.000 Excuse me, what about Julia Child?

00:33:05.000 Exactly.

00:33:06.000 Oh, excuse me.

00:33:08.000 Excuse me?

00:33:09.000 You can't go Emeril.

00:33:10.000 You can't say it started with Emeril. 0.91

00:33:12.000 But I'm sort of like in this era, you know, where it really fucking took off.

00:33:15.000 Julia Child was really the only one. 0.99

00:33:17.000 And that other guy, Graham Kerr or some shit, whatever the fucking guy's name was. 0.98

00:33:21.000 So was there like a calm before the storm before Emeril arrived? 0.99

00:33:25.000 Man, I don't know.

00:33:26.000 It was like Julia Child and there was nothing.

00:33:27.000 The world was searching for a TV cook. 1.00

00:33:29.000 I was fucking driving around in fucking Jettas and shit, smoking weed in Queens. 1.00

00:33:36.000 I had no idea. 1.00

00:33:38.000 Watching Saved by the Bell at 7 a.m.

00:33:40.000 Emeril's supposed to be a super nice guy.

00:33:43.000 Emeril Lagasse, by all accounts, like one of the nicest guys in the world.

00:33:48.000 Bam! 0.98

00:33:49.000 He says bam all the time.

00:33:51.000 Bam! 0.98

00:33:52.000 He gets hype.

00:33:53.000 By all accounts, like one of the nicest guys. 1.00

00:33:55.000 He just keeps scallions in his pocket and every fucking time he says bam, just throw scallions in your face. 0.95

00:34:01.000 Yeah, it's also interesting in the world of food and cooks and chefs that there's different schools of food in cooks and chefs. 0.98

00:34:10.000 There's the really experimental, artistic people, maybe even alternative in their musical choices.

00:34:17.000 And then there's Guy Fieri, who's a big, bolsterous American, drives a yellow Corvette, he's got frosted tips.

00:34:25.000 You know what I mean?

00:34:26.000 It's like he's got his own... 1.00

00:34:28.000 He's a fucking classic character. 1.00

00:34:30.000 ...whitesnake version of being an artist. 1.00

00:34:33.000 Yeah, he's a fucking Def Leppard. 0.99

00:34:34.000 Equally entertaining. 0.99

00:34:35.000 You know what I mean?

00:34:36.000 Like, I'm a Whitesnake fan, you know?

00:34:37.000 I love him.

00:34:39.000 He's incredible.

00:34:41.000 It's funny how those guys don't like each other.

00:34:44.000 Bourdain and him go back and forth.

00:34:46.000 There's a beef.

00:34:47.000 It's hilarious. 0.99

00:34:48.000 Bourdain is fucking hilarious. 0.99

00:34:51.000 He's hilarious. 0.99

00:34:52.000 He's like a comic.

00:34:53.000 He's a real dude.

00:34:54.000 He easily could be a comic.

00:34:55.000 He's 100%.

00:34:55.000 He worked in New York Kitchen his entire life.

00:34:59.000 He started jujitsu at 58. I know, I see.

00:35:02.000 57, 58. He's doing a good job.

00:35:04.000 He's rolling around over there.

00:35:05.000 He got a blue belt.

00:35:06.000 Really?

00:35:07.000 Yeah, he got his blue belt.

00:35:08.000 That's a legit blue belt from Henzo Gracie's Academy.

00:35:11.000 That is about as legit a blue belt as there is in the world. 0.97

00:35:14.000 You have to earn that.

00:35:15.000 You don't just get that.

00:35:17.000 That guy, that's very impressive.

00:35:19.000 That's very impressive.

00:35:21.000 To do that at his age.

00:35:22.000 And apparently he's doing it every day, man.

00:35:25.000 It becomes addictive, right?

00:35:26.000 Yeah, and I looked at your Instagram page.

00:35:28.000 You're working out.

00:35:29.000 You have someone who trains you sometimes.

00:35:32.000 Oh, yeah.

00:35:33.000 I've been athletic my entire life. 0.99

00:35:36.000 I played football in fucking high school, baseball. 0.99

00:35:40.000 As time goes on, you get lazy. 1.00

00:35:43.000 When I was younger, I was fucking juicing. 1.00

00:35:45.000 I was taking steroids and shit. 1.00

00:35:46.000 I was fucking buff. 1.00

00:35:48.000 I'm serious. 0.99

00:35:49.000 I believe you.

00:35:50.000 I was squatting like six. 0.98

00:35:52.000 I was fucking benching my highest. 0.99

00:35:54.000 You squatting 600 pounds? 0.99

00:35:55.000 Straight up.

00:35:56.000 No shoes on, belt, no wraps, just in the bucket.

00:36:01.000 You didn't wear shoes?

00:36:02.000 No shoes.

00:36:03.000 You know, you got to keep the flat, a good flat shoe.

00:36:06.000 Whoa.

00:36:06.000 600 pounds with no shoes.

00:36:07.000 That's crazy.

00:36:08.000 That's a lot of weight.

00:36:09.000 I was like 22 years old, 23 years old.

00:36:13.000 But it was probably because of the steroids.

00:36:15.000 Well, doing a show like this where you're traveling around the world and you're eating all that food, I would imagine, man, it would be super easy to just get lazy.

00:36:23.000 Bro, I just literally lost 50 pounds and I just gained another 20. So my whole life is fluctuation.

00:36:30.000 I just need to get to that point where I need to... 0.97

00:36:33.000 Get past that fluctuating point and just go down and start seeing all these fucking abs that I have under there. 0.98

00:36:42.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.98

00:36:43.000 I have like 32 ab muscles that you could possibly see.

00:36:49.000 All that needs to be done is shredded.

00:36:51.000 Do you really want to lose that much weight?

00:36:53.000 Of course. 1.00

00:36:56.000 Anybody that's overweight wants to have a fucking six pack before they die. 1.00

00:37:02.000 It's a fact. 1.00

00:37:03.000 Is it a fact?

00:37:04.000 Yeah.

00:37:04.000 I have one vein.

00:37:06.000 You know when you gauge working out, if you can see the vein or not?

00:37:10.000 Yes.

00:37:11.000 I have that good one vein over here, the squiggly. 0.66

00:37:13.000 Upper shoulder Stallone vein.

00:37:15.000 Exactly, the squiggly one.

00:37:17.000 Yeah.

00:37:18.000 It's a good one.

00:37:19.000 That's a good one.

00:37:20.000 What was the bodybuilder? 1.00

00:37:21.000 The fucking... 1.00

00:37:22.000 The French guy. 1.00

00:37:23.000 I forgot his name.

00:37:24.000 French guy? 0.81

00:37:26.000 Paul DeLay.

00:37:27.000 I don't know who that guy is.

00:37:28.000 That's an obscure reference.

00:37:29.000 Exactly.

00:37:30.000 I have obscure strongman references.

00:37:33.000 All types of bodybuilder references. 0.96

00:37:35.000 Yeah, that's a ridiculous one. 1.00

00:37:37.000 Look up Paul DeLay and tell me that he doesn't have that fucking... 1.00

00:37:40.000 He's famous for the squiggle. 0.99

00:37:44.000 So, have you thought about hiring a nutritionist?

00:37:48.000 I know what to do.

00:37:50.000 You know what to do?

00:37:50.000 I do know what to do.

00:37:52.000 It's just not easy doing it alone.

00:37:54.000 I need someone to, you know, literally know you can't do that.

00:37:58.000 You can't have that at one in the morning. 0.99

00:38:01.000 You can't eat a fucking In-N-Out right now. 0.99

00:38:04.000 You can't have fries right now. 1.00

00:38:05.000 Just stick to it.

00:38:07.000 It's hard to stick to it.

00:38:08.000 So is it just a self-control thing?

00:38:11.000 Yes.

00:38:12.000 But I have self-control in spurts, which is weird.

00:38:16.000 There is Paul DeLay.

00:38:17.000 There he is.

00:38:17.000 Jesus Christ.

00:38:19.000 This guy's body is insane. 0.99

00:38:22.000 That doesn't even look real. 0.51

00:38:24.000 Oh my god.

00:38:25.000 What's with the suspenders?

00:38:26.000 That's two pictures in a row with him wearing suspenders. 1.00

00:38:28.000 They always have suspect outfits on and fucking body. 0.99

00:38:31.000 They always wear some wild, like, where did you get that? 1.00

00:38:34.000 Look at his jeans with the belt.

00:38:36.000 That's definitely Carl Kanai. 0.98

00:38:38.000 Dude, he is swole.

00:38:41.000 He's so sweet. 1.00

00:38:42.000 That's ridiculous. 0.97

00:38:43.000 Yeah. 0.98

00:38:44.000 That guy's so big.

00:38:45.000 I used to look at magazines and want to be like that.

00:38:47.000 It's just crazy. 0.99

00:38:49.000 Like Ronnie Coleman and fucking... 1.00

00:38:52.000 Insane Science Project right there. 1.00

00:38:53.000 Really?

00:38:54.000 That's a science project.

00:38:55.000 It's amazing how many of those science projects exist, though.

00:38:59.000 I mean, that's what all those magazines are.

00:39:01.000 It's the weirdest conspiracy, and it is a conspiracy, that all those, like, if you're looking at those bodybuilding magazines and shit, that none of them, like, I don't know, maybe they do now, but back in the day, none of them were talking about how they did steroids. 0.71

00:39:17.000 You're right. 0.61

00:39:17.000 It was all dancing around it. 0.61

00:39:20.000 But they were also talking about, like, you know, I take creatine from, you know, Muscle Dick Hard Corporation, and this creatine is guaranteed to pack on 30 pounds of mass, and they were all, like, pretending that they got all that muscle from some stuff that,

00:39:36.000 you know, it's like, barely works.

00:39:39.000 Like, creatine works a little bit.

00:39:41.000 But if you get to the Paul Delay levels...

00:39:43.000 No way.

00:39:44.000 You can't look like that.

00:39:45.000 A human being can't look like that.

00:39:48.000 I don't think people understand that.

00:39:50.000 No. 0.97

00:39:50.000 And I don't think I understand why the fuck they used to not talk about it. 0.97

00:39:54.000 Why was it so taboo? 0.98

00:39:56.000 Because it was illegal.

00:39:57.000 Yeah, but now it's illegal and everyone knows what you're doing. 0.99

00:40:00.000 It's like more out in the open now with all the baseball shit and this. 0.96

00:40:04.000 I don't think that it's wrong. 0.99

00:40:06.000 Every baseball player...

00:40:07.000 Oh, that's what he looks like now?

00:40:08.000 That's crazy.

00:40:11.000 That looks like a meme.

00:40:12.000 That looks like something on the... 0.99

00:40:14.000 Yo, what the fuck? 1.00

00:40:16.000 That is insane. 1.00

00:40:18.000 What does it say above that, Jamie?

00:40:21.000 He already experienced some atrophy of his arms and back.

00:40:25.000 What had happened to him?

00:40:27.000 It just says he's clearly off anabolics and stuff.

00:40:30.000 Oh, I see.

00:40:32.000 Wow.

00:40:32.000 Jesus Christ.

00:40:34.000 Well, you know...

00:40:36.000 That guy, when he was as big as he was at the top, he had to be on just staggering amounts of that stuff.

00:40:44.000 What people don't understand is, even if you...

00:40:47.000 I do know one dude, though, I have to be honest.

00:40:50.000 I know one dude that I know who never took anything.

00:40:54.000 I know he didn't.

00:40:55.000 Because he wouldn't even eat vitamins.

00:40:57.000 This guy ate all his vegetables.

00:40:58.000 He's a very smart guy.

00:40:59.000 And he got really big. 0.97

00:41:02.000 Like, ridiculous. 0.94

00:41:03.000 He was my friend Brian Frazier. 0.92

00:41:04.000 He's a writer.

00:41:05.000 He's a comic out of Boston. 0.99

00:41:07.000 And at one point in time, he was fucking enormous. 0.96

00:41:10.000 And I know all he did was work out. 0.98

00:41:12.000 That's all he did.

00:41:13.000 He was just a, like, dedicated bodybuilder.

00:41:16.000 Dedicated to lifting weights. 1.00

00:41:18.000 He was fucking. 1.00

00:41:19.000 Gigantic. 1.00

00:41:20.000 Yeah, man.

00:41:20.000 Some people just have those genetics.

00:41:23.000 No, it wasn't even genetics.

00:41:24.000 He was just dedicated.

00:41:25.000 Just dedicated. 0.99

00:41:26.000 Just dedicated, hard work, and he got fucking big. 0.99

00:41:28.000 Was he shredded? 0.99

00:41:30.000 Shredded. 0.96

00:41:31.000 Wow.

00:41:31.000 He was entering competitions.

00:41:33.000 He was ridiculously swole. 0.62

00:41:35.000 So much so that one time he went up on stage, he had a golf shirt on, like an alligator shirt, and he came off stage and I pulled him aside and said, dude, listen to me, you can't go on stage with short sleeve shirts. 0.96

00:41:47.000 He goes, why?

00:41:48.000 I go, because your arms are way too big.

00:41:50.000 I go, they're way too big.

00:41:51.000 They're distracting me.

00:41:52.000 I'm like, I'm your friend and they're distracting me.

00:41:55.000 You're up there, you're so intimidating. 0.96

00:41:57.000 He was so swole.

00:41:59.000 I was like, you can't go on stage like that.

00:42:01.000 Nobody wants to see that.

00:42:02.000 I feel like that's how I wanted to be at one point.

00:42:04.000 I feel like that's what I wanted.

00:42:06.000 Yeah, but...

00:42:07.000 Maybe it's the height thing.

00:42:09.000 You want to be wide that way.

00:42:10.000 It's because, you know, you're a little bit shorter than the normal man.

00:42:15.000 Yeah.

00:42:16.000 You want to be tall that way.

00:42:16.000 You and I, we go east-west.

00:42:18.000 Exactly.

00:42:18.000 We can't go north-south.

00:42:21.000 But I think that if you really wanted to do it, though, you would be like Brian.

00:42:26.000 You would be dedicated to it, and you'd really want to do it.

00:42:28.000 You'd get into it.

00:42:29.000 But it's one of those things where you want to do it, but you're also like a guy who really enjoys life.

00:42:34.000 And there's too many things that I have to be dedicated to, man. 0.96

00:42:37.000 It's fucking hard. 0.99

00:42:39.000 You don't have to be dedicated to music, to this, to that, to food, to fucking everybody, family. 0.99

00:42:44.000 It's like, come on, man. 0.99

00:42:45.000 Yeah.

00:42:46.000 How many more things I have to...

00:42:47.000 Well, I think if you do decide to do something like that, I think what you're saying is what's really the true thing that a lot of people are trying to avoid when it comes to losing weight or changing your life...

00:42:58.000 You have to be dedicated to that.

00:43:00.000 It can't be something you do like, hey, I'm dedicated to my music.

00:43:03.000 Hey, I'm dedicated to my golf game.

00:43:06.000 But I'm going to lose weight too.

00:43:09.000 No, you have to be dedicated.

00:43:10.000 Yes, that has to be your main goal in life is to be doing that.

00:43:13.000 You have to focus on that.

00:43:15.000 It has to be one of them.

00:43:16.000 You're going to try to change your chemistry. 0.72

00:43:18.000 And when people do it, it's so fucking impressive.

00:43:21.000 I mean, how many people have you met that have lost like 100 pounds and you just want to just... 0.98

00:43:25.000 Shake their hand and go, dude, you fucking did it. 0.99

00:43:28.000 Bro. 1.00

00:43:28.000 You lost a hundred pounds. 1.00

00:43:30.000 I lost 80 and I gained it fucking back. 0.99

00:43:32.000 You know what I'm talking about? 0.98

00:43:34.000 My fluctuation.

00:43:36.000 It's crazy.

00:43:37.000 Have you ever thought about, I mean, I know you love food, but have you ever thought about, like, changing the kind of foods you eat?

00:43:44.000 Yeah, of course.

00:43:46.000 I don't think it's the fine foods that I eat. 1.00

00:43:49.000 I think it's the refined sugars and the disgusting shit that I decide to eat. 0.99

00:43:54.000 Like a chipwitch that I had last night. 1.00

00:43:56.000 What'd you have?

00:43:56.000 A chipwitch.

00:43:57.000 What's a chipwitch? 1.00

00:43:58.000 It's a fucking two Toll House cookies with ice cream in between. 0.99

00:44:02.000 That sounds awesome. 0.99

00:44:03.000 It was good and it was melted and I still ate it. 0.99

00:44:04.000 Damn. 1.00

00:44:05.000 That's fucking disgusting. 1.00

00:44:06.000 It's piglet shit. 1.00

00:44:07.000 That sounds great. 1.00

00:44:11.000 He actually had it in his pocket for about a half an hour before I hate it.

00:44:19.000 Oh my god.

00:44:20.000 Yeah, so...

00:44:21.000 I bet it was glorious when it was going down.

00:44:23.000 It was.

00:44:24.000 My friend Aubrey has the best way of looking at it. 0.98

00:44:27.000 We were talking about it, and it was like, it's so crazy that just a few moments of mouth pleasure is worth fucking up your entire body. 0.88

00:44:35.000 Like, your body, the thing that carries you around in this life, the thing that you need more than anything.

00:44:40.000 And just for a few moments of mouth pleasure, just...

00:44:44.000 And then you're feeling your whole body going... 1.00

00:44:48.000 What did you just throw in here and have us deal with, you asshole? 1.00

00:44:52.000 It's crazy. 1.00

00:44:53.000 It's fucking nuts. 1.00

00:44:54.000 You asshole. 1.00

00:44:56.000 It's fucking nuts. 1.00

00:44:57.000 What a cruel, sick, fucked up joke nature has played on us. 1.00

00:45:01.000 To make the things that are the most delicious going down, the worst for your body. 1.00

00:45:07.000 That's a fucking conspiracy. 1.00

00:45:09.000 What a cunt nature is. 1.00

00:45:11.000 Nature's a dirty cunt. 1.00

00:45:13.000 Bitch. 1.00

00:45:14.000 What a bitch. 1.00

00:45:15.000 Can you imagine, man? 1.00

00:45:16.000 Like...

00:45:18.000 If you're eating fried chicken with waffles, okay? 0.97

00:45:23.000 Fried chicken with waffles is one of the most fucking bang-up meals America's ever created. 0.96

00:45:28.000 Like a good, solid... 0.98

00:45:29.000 You're gonna put butter on the waffle, right?

00:45:30.000 Of course!

00:45:32.000 Like Roscoe's.

00:45:33.000 Roscoe's chicken and waffles.

00:45:34.000 Just the sheer amount of sugar you are taking in.

00:45:38.000 With the waffles...

00:45:39.000 What drink are you gonna have?

00:45:40.000 What?

00:45:41.000 Coca-Cola!

00:45:42.000 I'm not even gonna pretend to have a Diet Coke. 1.00

00:45:44.000 You gotta get the fucking... 1.00

00:45:46.000 It's like... 1.00

00:45:48.000 Ten times sweeter than Kool-Aid.

00:45:50.000 What is Sunset?

00:45:52.000 It's orange drink, red drink, and yellow drink mixed.

00:45:58.000 Just throw them all together?

00:45:59.000 That's the Sunset? 1.00

00:46:00.000 It's fucking stupid. 1.00

00:46:01.000 But then if you want to get nuts, you throw butter on the fried chicken, hot sauce, maple syrup. 1.00

00:46:07.000 Definitely hot sauce.

00:46:08.000 But then you have to have the grits as well that has mad butter in it.

00:46:12.000 And, you know, it's like...

00:46:14.000 When does it end?

00:46:16.000 I think the issue is the sheer grams of sugar you're taking in.

00:46:21.000 From the waffle and the maple syrup alone, you must be taking in an ungodly amount of sugar.

00:46:28.000 Yeah, straight off that stuff.

00:46:30.000 Yeah, because I drench those things, too.

00:46:33.000 The way I do it is, like, if I'm having some maple syrup...

00:46:35.000 You're gonna go in.

00:46:36.000 It's gonna be covered.

00:46:37.000 Going in.

00:46:38.000 Yeah, I'm not gonna drizzle it and go, I wish I would've had a little bit more maple syrup, but I'm being sensible. 1.00

00:46:43.000 Nah, fuck that. 1.00

00:46:43.000 Fuck that. 1.00

00:46:44.000 Yeah, if you're eating Roscoe's, you know, you've probably already made some critical errors. 1.00

00:46:50.000 And you're doing a crazy diet right now, right?

00:46:52.000 Right now I am, yeah.

00:46:54.000 So that's what I'm saying.

00:46:54.000 Like, if you were...

00:46:56.000 You can't even have a cheat day, can you?

00:46:58.000 You're not supposed to.

00:46:59.000 I had a beer yesterday.

00:47:00.000 That's what I'm saying.

00:47:01.000 I don't think you're really supposed to have a beer.

00:47:02.000 See, you didn't go all out.

00:47:04.000 If you have a cheat day, you should just like...

00:47:06.000 Yeah, I haven't gone all out.

00:47:08.000 I've just decided to try it for 60 days.

00:47:12.000 Well, I want to just see what it's...

00:47:14.000 I don't think you really evaluate...

00:47:16.000 I think...

00:47:17.000 I've been eating pretty healthy, but one way my whole life.

00:47:21.000 And I took some time off of gluten for a while.

00:47:24.000 And I liked that.

00:47:26.000 But what I liked about it was that I felt like really what was going on was I was just taking in way less sugar.

00:47:31.000 By not having pastas and breads, which I really love, I was just taking in way less sugar.

00:47:35.000 And I lost weight, my face got thinner, and I was like, this is interesting.

00:47:39.000 It's like...

00:47:40.000 How much of what I'm taking in is sugar?

00:47:42.000 So I went back to occasionally eating bread and just trying to avoid it.

00:47:47.000 And then from the last 15 or maybe 15 days, something like that, I've been doing this where I'm doing nothing.

00:47:55.000 No grains, no pasta, no bread, no sugar.

00:47:59.000 Nothing other than plants. 0.98

00:48:04.000 Vegetables, fats, coconut oil, shit like that, and meat. 0.99

00:48:07.000 That's it. 0.98

00:48:08.000 So it's kind of like the Atkins diet from back in the day, right?

00:48:11.000 Sort of, but more fats.

00:48:14.000 More fats?

00:48:15.000 Yeah, more fats even than proteins.

00:48:16.000 Actually, what the diet is saying is that we use too much protein.

00:48:22.000 In that, like, if you want to do, like, some extreme powerlifting and you want to get to be the size of Paul Dillet?

00:48:29.000 Dillet?

00:48:30.000 Who knows?

00:48:31.000 Arnold Schwarzenegger?

00:48:32.000 How about that?

00:48:33.000 You gotta, you know, you have to eat a lot more than the average person.

00:48:36.000 But for the average person, the average person that's, like, reasonably athletic, your body doesn't really want to process all that extra protein.

00:48:43.000 And what it really needs to burn is fats.

00:48:46.000 And so...

00:48:48.000 Your body will convert, you know, anything into energy that you eat.

00:48:51.000 But if you live off of a carbohydrate-based diet, their argument is, you know, you're subject to more fluctuations.

00:48:59.000 Your levels rise and fall.

00:49:01.000 That's like when you crash after you eat.

00:49:03.000 Yep.

00:49:04.000 And when, you know, you haven't eaten in a while, you're starving.

00:49:07.000 And a lot of that, I think, is also related to gut bacteria.

00:49:10.000 And I'm starting to learn more about that, but not enough really where I can talk.

00:49:13.000 Probiotic stuff?

00:49:15.000 Probiotics, gut bacteria, and just the amount of different things that you eat.

00:49:21.000 There's certain types of gut bacteria that thrive off of unhealthy food.

00:49:26.000 And if you're eating a lot of sugars, apparently what they're saying is that there's different types of gut bacteria that crave that sugar.

00:49:33.000 And so when you haven't had it in a while, that gut bacteria, even if you're full, you might have had like pot roast and mashed potatoes and vegetables and it was like nothing fucked up at all, right? 0.99

00:49:44.000 You eat that and your body's like, hey asshole, where's the sugar? 0.99

00:49:47.000 Come on! 1.00

00:49:48.000 Come on! 0.61

00:49:49.000 Because they're craving it.

00:49:50.000 It's craving it.

00:49:50.000 Like those rumbles that you would get.

00:49:53.000 So I don't know if that's the case with me, so I'm just giving it 60 whole days to see what it's like.

00:50:00.000 And if I like how I'm feeling after 60 days, I'll tell you right now, though, just a couple weeks in, it's awesome.

00:50:07.000 I feel great.

00:50:08.000 I feel great.

00:50:10.000 I don't feel very hungry in between meals, which is interesting.

00:50:14.000 So I go eat, and then I guess once you get fat adapted, you just don't have as many crashes.

00:50:20.000 I just don't know if it's what I want to do sustainably, because it's hard when you go to a restaurant or something like that.

00:50:26.000 It's hard.

00:50:27.000 You're telling me, man.

00:50:28.000 You can't even have rice?

00:50:29.000 Like, there's a lot of delicious dishes that come with rice.

00:50:32.000 Like, you can't even have rice with a meal?

00:50:34.000 Like, that seems so extreme.

00:50:36.000 It's unbelievable.

00:50:37.000 But so far, so good. 0.98

00:50:39.000 Every time I've ever attempted to lose weight, it was like I did that Atkins diet back in the day, but it felt like I'm eating eggs and sausage and all this nasty shit and still losing weight. 0.98

00:50:51.000 Yeah. 0.98

00:50:51.000 I didn't understand that. 0.98

00:50:53.000 But I fucking ate a piece of bread and it would be over. 0.99

00:50:56.000 I put five pounds on. 0.99

00:50:57.000 Yeah.

00:50:58.000 Isn't that crazy?

00:50:59.000 It's not worth it.

00:51:00.000 And then you feel shittier than you did because you gained all that weight and you ate all that disgusting stuff that's gotta be sticking to you somewhere, right?

00:51:08.000 Well, it's just hard for your body to process.

00:51:10.000 Exactly.

00:51:10.000 It becomes sugar.

00:51:11.000 And now it, yo, it fucking makes you shit really badly. 1.00

00:51:15.000 Really badly. 1.00

00:51:15.000 Wrists like you, you can't leave the house. 1.00

00:51:18.000 You have to run to the fucking bed. 1.00

00:51:21.000 But the Atkins is a little bit different than this diet that I'm doing in that this diet just has more fat. 1.00

00:51:28.000 But you still go into that same thing, right?

00:51:30.000 The ketosis?

00:51:31.000 Yeah.

00:51:32.000 That's what they want you to do.

00:51:33.000 Yeah.

00:51:34.000 That's the point of these diets?

00:51:36.000 Yep.

00:51:36.000 Yeah, so your body starts burning fat.

00:51:39.000 It's fascinating.

00:51:41.000 The most fascinating thing about it is seeing people argue it from both sides. 0.97

00:51:45.000 Seeing people argue that this is bad for your health and you're fucking up and don't do this. 0.96

00:51:51.000 People get upset. 0.99

00:51:52.000 They get upset like you're trying Satanism.

00:51:54.000 You know, it's like all of a sudden, like, I'm thinking maybe Satan's got a point.

00:51:59.000 I'm gonna go meet these guys and I'm just gonna see what's going on.

00:52:02.000 Like, that's how they're behaving when you're talking about just going on this ketogenic diet.

00:52:08.000 They pretend like you're doing something evil.

00:52:10.000 Like, don't do it! 1.00

00:52:11.000 You're gonna fuck yourself up, man! 1.00

00:52:12.000 Cut it out! 1.00

00:52:13.000 Yeah, like anyone really fucking knows. 0.97

00:52:15.000 And then they start posting all these pro-carb, like, you know, more carbs, hashtag carb up. 0.98

00:52:21.000 You know, carb is brain fuel. 0.93

00:52:23.000 Come on.

00:52:23.000 What are you...

00:52:24.000 Just relax.

00:52:25.000 Relax.

00:52:26.000 I said I'm trying it for 60 days.

00:52:27.000 Listen, I'm not going to lie. 0.99

00:52:28.000 It's not the easiest thing to have to give up those sheep's milk agnolote and fucking gnocchi. 0.99

00:52:36.000 I know. 0.99

00:52:37.000 Gnocchi is very good stuff.

00:52:39.000 Pasta, linguine with clam sauce.

00:52:41.000 There's a place that just opened up directly across the street from my house.

00:52:45.000 Incredible.

00:52:46.000 It has one of my favorite dishes ever.

00:52:48.000 It's like cacio y pepe.

00:52:50.000 Just cheese and pepper with pasta.

00:52:52.000 Oh my god.

00:52:53.000 But she does it with the pink peppercorn. 0.98

00:52:54.000 So it's like you're eating a bowl of flowers.

00:52:57.000 Wow.

00:52:58.000 It's one of the most incredible things in life.

00:53:00.000 I crave it. 1.00

00:53:02.000 God damn it, this diet's bullshit. 1.00

00:53:04.000 Exactly. 1.00

00:53:04.000 My bad. 1.00

00:53:05.000 I'm sorry about talking about pasta.

00:53:08.000 Please, keep talking.

00:53:09.000 I'll take my pants off real quick. 1.00

00:53:13.000 Pasta whore. 1.00

00:53:15.000 That's what you are. 1.00

00:53:16.000 There's just something about pasta that's, it's like, it's the real comfort food, you know?

00:53:24.000 It's comfort.

00:53:24.000 I mean, for you, for me, for sure.

00:53:27.000 Yeah, I like raviolis, like just cheese raviolis with like a good sauce.

00:53:32.000 You like them fried?

00:53:33.000 Fried?

00:53:34.000 Fried ravioli.

00:53:35.000 I've never had it. 0.99

00:53:36.000 Just fucking do it as if you were doing a chicken cutlet. 1.00

00:53:39.000 Put it in the egg. 1.00

00:53:40.000 Really?

00:53:40.000 Bread crumb.

00:53:42.000 You'll thank me.

00:53:42.000 Trust me.

00:53:43.000 Wow.

00:53:45.000 Like a chicken cutlet.

00:53:46.000 It's unbelievable.

00:53:47.000 Fried ravioli.

00:53:48.000 Ooh.

00:53:48.000 It's unbelievable.

00:53:50.000 Jamie's shaking his head.

00:53:51.000 You've been all over this country.

00:53:52.000 I'm surprised you have never eaten fried ravioli.

00:53:54.000 Yeah.

00:53:55.000 It's a Midwestern thing.

00:53:56.000 There's some standards that I have that I have to stick with.

00:54:00.000 If I go to Philly, I'm having a cheesesteak.

00:54:03.000 100%.

00:54:04.000 That's the standard.

00:54:04.000 I have to stick with that.

00:54:05.000 Do we eat pork?

00:54:06.000 Yes.

00:54:06.000 What about the pork sandwich?

00:54:08.000 I feel like the cheesesteak is a bit overrated over there.

00:54:11.000 How dare you?

00:54:12.000 Listen to me.

00:54:13.000 The guy at my deli. 1.00

00:54:15.000 In Queens, makes a fucking better cheesesteak. 1.00

00:54:18.000 What? 1.00

00:54:19.000 Than who?

00:54:20.000 Than all of Philadelphia?

00:54:21.000 No, no, let's not get crazy.

00:54:24.000 But you're saying better.

00:54:27.000 Because they're usually not flavored.

00:54:29.000 Oh, okay.

00:54:30.000 You know what I mean?

00:54:31.000 They just do the steak, the cheese, there's no salt.

00:54:33.000 There needs to be salt.

00:54:35.000 A little bit at least.

00:54:36.000 A little bit of salt with meat is always good, right?

00:54:38.000 You know, it brings out the flavor.

00:54:39.000 Yeah.

00:54:40.000 I don't want to have to drench it in hot sauce or ketchup. 0.98

00:54:42.000 Imagine that, like you're telling everybody, everybody's fucking up, you need salt. 1.00

00:54:47.000 Get it together, bitch. 1.00

00:54:48.000 It's that simple. 1.00

00:54:49.000 Just throw some salt on that.

00:54:50.000 It's that simple.

00:54:51.000 And they've yet to...

00:54:52.000 Well, that's fogo de chow.

00:54:54.000 Do you ever eat at fogo de chow?

00:54:55.000 I have, yep.

00:54:55.000 One of the things about fogo de chow, when you get a nice piece of picanha from them, it's always got salt on it.

00:55:02.000 It's always got a nice salty...

00:55:04.000 They have a baste that they baste the meat on when they put them over the fire. 0.98

00:55:09.000 That place is ridiculous. 0.99

00:55:10.000 It's incredible. 0.99

00:55:11.000 So good.

00:55:11.000 When they bring out that whole side of beef rib and it just...

00:55:14.000 It's over.

00:55:16.000 Well, it's ridiculous too because you just get right after it.

00:55:19.000 You sit down at one of those places.

00:55:21.000 You have a red and a green on your little card, like a poker chip.

00:55:25.000 And you flip it over whenever you're ready to party.

00:55:28.000 Let's do this.

00:55:29.000 You put it on green.

00:55:30.000 These dudes just start swooping in on you with skewers. 1.00

00:55:33.000 Straight up.

00:55:35.000 And swords.

00:55:35.000 Woo!

00:55:36.000 Yeah.

00:55:37.000 Have you ever flipped a Tourette?

00:55:39.000 Flipped a Tourette?

00:55:40.000 No.

00:55:42.000 Have you ever flipped...

00:55:43.000 Flipped it to red.

00:55:44.000 Have you ever flipped the thing to red?

00:55:46.000 Oh yeah, definitely. 1.00

00:55:47.000 Fuck that. 1.00

00:55:49.000 Whoa. 1.00

00:55:49.000 It stays on green. 1.00

00:55:50.000 Wow.

00:55:51.000 Until we literally gotta waddle out.

00:55:55.000 You will.

00:55:56.000 And this explains my issue.

00:55:58.000 Yeah.

00:55:59.000 We're all different.

00:56:00.000 We all have different needs.

00:56:02.000 I can't do it. 0.99

00:56:03.000 Damn, I feel like... 0.98

00:56:04.000 I don't know. 0.99

00:56:06.000 Now I feel a little bit down.

00:56:08.000 Don't feel down.

00:56:09.000 Ari Shafir is our undisputed world champion of continuing to eat at Fogo de Chow.

00:56:14.000 No one's been able to touch him.

00:56:16.000 Ari outbeats...

00:56:17.000 He outeats Joey.

00:56:18.000 He outeats me.

00:56:19.000 He just keeps going.

00:56:21.000 Ari Shafir can put away food like probably almost no one I've ever seen at one of those Fogo de Chows. 0.99

00:56:26.000 He's ridiculous. 0.98

00:56:27.000 He just keeps it coming. 0.99

00:56:28.000 I'm like, where are you putting this?

00:56:30.000 He just keeps it coming.

00:56:31.000 Does he go get the rice and everything that just goes for the meats? 0.99

00:56:34.000 Oh, I mean, he might have a couple of fucking pieces of lettuce. 0.99

00:56:38.000 He's there to party, you know? 1.00

00:56:41.000 That dude just, he keeps that fucking green. 0.99

00:56:43.000 Like, we all tap out, and we're like, Jesus, sorry. 0.99

00:56:46.000 And the guy's coming by with some lamb chops.

00:56:48.000 He's like, sure, bring it over.

00:56:49.000 Do you have any of that jelly?

00:56:51.000 Any of that lime jelly?

00:56:52.000 Is that what it is?

00:56:53.000 What is the jelly?

00:56:54.000 The mint.

00:56:55.000 Mint.

00:56:58.000 How many of these do you smoke a night?

00:57:00.000 A lot.

00:57:02.000 I'm usually hitting the oil, you know, all day long.

00:57:05.000 Hitting that pure oil. 0.99

00:57:07.000 Taking some fucking mushrooms. 1.00

00:57:10.000 I just got some nice mushrooms in yesterday. 1.00

00:57:14.000 You mean like food mushrooms or magic ones?

00:57:16.000 No, magical ones, yeah.

00:57:20.000 How long before those are legal? 1.00

00:57:21.000 How long before, after pop becomes legal, we all just get together and go, hey, cut this shit. 1.00

00:57:27.000 All the people that made it illegal, they're all dead now. 1.00

00:57:29.000 We know they were liars.

00:57:31.000 I don't even think it's illegal.

00:57:33.000 I don't know it's illegal.

00:57:34.000 I just think it's legal.

00:57:36.000 All it is is... 1.00

00:57:37.000 It's something that grows from fucking... 1.00

00:57:40.000 Your Honor, may I speak with my client for a moment? 0.99

00:57:42.000 Exactly.

00:57:42.000 I just didn't...

00:57:43.000 I didn't know.

00:57:44.000 I wasn't...

00:57:45.000 What do you want me to say?

00:57:46.000 Sir, you're a registered voter.

00:57:49.000 Okay.

00:57:49.000 You are a...

00:57:50.000 You have a driver's license.

00:57:51.000 You have to know what is and is not legal as far as what you're being arrested for.

00:57:57.000 I'm a bad citizen.

00:57:58.000 You can't say that, sir.

00:58:00.000 So let's try this again.

00:58:03.000 Have you ever been hit in the head?

00:58:04.000 Once.

00:58:05.000 I have reason to believe my client has sustained a head injury earlier in his life and virtually never recovered.

00:58:13.000 What he needs is our care.

00:58:15.000 What he doesn't need is our judgment.

00:58:18.000 I'm like Vincent Giganti.

00:58:19.000 Yeah.

00:58:20.000 He only feels normal. 1.00

00:58:21.000 Fucking walking around like I'm loco. 1.00

00:58:22.000 He only feels normal when he gets mushrooms in him. 1.00

00:58:26.000 Therapeutic use of mushrooms is on its way, folks.

00:58:28.000 There's no doubt about that.

00:58:28.000 It's going to happen.

00:58:29.000 It should have happened a long time ago.

00:58:31.000 It would be better for all of us.

00:58:32.000 My girl is studying that, too.

00:58:33.000 Is she?

00:58:34.000 Yeah, she's into holistic medicine and healing through psychedelics. 0.94

00:58:38.000 There's a lot of people that are involved in that now, including MAPS, the, I don't know what it is, Multidisciplinary Association or something, Psychedelic Studies.

00:58:48.000 They're acknowledging it, right?

00:58:50.000 Oh, they've made some massive strides in getting...

00:58:54.000 Trying to get therapeutic use of MDMA for soldiers and other people suffering from PTSD. And they're showing all these applied uses of really excellent compounds that have been demonized.

00:59:12.000 And because they've been demonized, people that could really use them.

00:59:18.000 Aren't getting them.

00:59:19.000 Like, can you abuse them? 0.96

00:59:21.000 But I think we've already established that's a dumb argument, because you can abuse anything. 1.00

00:59:26.000 You can go to a store and buy a hammer, and you can build a house with it, or you can hit yourself in the dick. 1.00

00:59:31.000 If you're fucking stupid. 1.00

00:59:33.000 You can do whatever you want, right? 1.00

00:59:35.000 Like, you can't, you can't, that's not a good argument, that someone could abuse it so it shouldn't be legal. 0.99

00:59:40.000 There's massive amounts of shit to abuse all over us all the time. 0.99

00:59:44.000 So stop. 1.00

00:59:45.000 Cars.

00:59:45.000 You can, I mean, anything.

00:59:47.000 Bikes.

00:59:48.000 You can abuse everything.

00:59:49.000 I think the use of them, they're magic.

00:59:53.000 There's a reason why we call them magic mushrooms.

00:59:55.000 Absolutely. 0.99

00:59:55.000 They're fucking magic. 0.99

00:59:56.000 You can have incredible experiences on them. 0.99

01:00:00.000 And the fact that we are not allowed to, and that we have to worry about someone locking us in a cage, if we're doing some shit that's not hurting anybody, it's not even hurting you. 0.81

01:00:08.000 Like, mushrooms don't hurt you. 0.82

01:00:10.000 You have to take some insane amount of them for it to be like the LD50 rate.

01:00:14.000 It's like, you have to take pounds of it, right?

01:00:16.000 What's the LD50 from psychedelic mushrooms for psilocybin?

01:00:23.000 It's really high. 1.00

01:00:24.000 It's like something stupid. 1.00

01:00:26.000 Like, you almost can't even eat it. 1.00

01:00:29.000 How many pounds do you have to eat?

01:00:34.000 I'll tell you this. 1.00

01:00:35.000 Two grams had me on my fucking ass. 1.00

01:00:39.000 This is for mice. 1.00

01:00:41.000 You killed mice with mushrooms.

01:00:44.000 Oh my god. 1.00

01:00:46.000 First of all, here's something fucked up. 0.99

01:00:49.000 Scroll down again. 0.98

01:00:51.000 Scroll up again, rather, so I can see the study.

01:00:54.000 The name of the study, what's the name of the study at the top?

01:00:57.000 How many dried mushrooms would I have to eat to die from an overdose of psilocybin?

01:01:01.000 What is this on?

01:01:02.000 What website is this?

01:01:04.000 Shroomery.

01:01:07.000 Shroomery. 1.00

01:01:08.000 How fucking crazy is that? 0.99

01:01:10.000 The dude asks. 0.99

01:01:12.000 He asks, how many mushrooms do I have to eat before I overdose?

01:01:18.000 Using the data for rats and accepting a median of 1% potency, it would require the consumption of 1,680 grams of mushrooms to reach the LD50 for a 60 kilogram rat.

01:01:34.000 You have to eat a lot.

01:01:35.000 Whoa.

01:01:36.000 That's a lot of grams. 0.75

01:01:37.000 That's a lot of grams. 0.75

01:01:39.000 But rats are tougher than us.

01:01:41.000 Rats can eat rats. 0.98

01:01:43.000 Yeah, they don't fucking die, exactly. 0.99

01:01:45.000 Yeah, they eat each other, man. 0.98

01:01:46.000 You can't even go off that.

01:01:47.000 I've told this story a hundred times.

01:01:48.000 I killed a rat once in my driveway, in my garage.

01:01:53.000 Went out in the morning to clean the trap and it was gone.

01:01:55.000 They had eaten him.

01:01:57.000 Ugh.

01:01:58.000 The others.

01:01:58.000 The others had eaten him.

01:01:59.000 Yeah.

01:02:00.000 Oof.

01:02:01.000 Dude, I mean, down to nothing.

01:02:03.000 Down to, like, the tail. 1.00

01:02:04.000 Damn. 0.99

01:02:04.000 It was insane. 0.99

01:02:05.000 Yeah.

01:02:06.000 Savages, man.

01:02:07.000 It was just...

01:02:08.000 They're survivors.

01:02:10.000 Yeah, but it was so creepy to think that I'm sharing my house with cannibals. 0.91

01:02:15.000 Like, these are...

01:02:18.000 Rodent animal cannibals.

01:02:20.000 That when one of them dies, the other ones just burn through them.

01:02:23.000 And there's a bunch of them around me.

01:02:25.000 They're in my ceiling.

01:02:26.000 I hear them crawling around in there.

01:02:27.000 They're in the house.

01:02:28.000 They're just too small. 0.89

01:02:30.000 Or, you know, they're too small for them to kill me. 1.00

01:02:33.000 That shit freaks me the fuck out, man. 1.00

01:02:35.000 I had a squirrel in my house one time in the wall. 1.00

01:02:38.000 And you hear them three in the morning. 1.00

01:02:40.000 I'm sitting there three in the morning naked with my fucking... 1.00

01:02:43.000 Just watching SportsCenter. 1.00

01:02:46.000 And they start fighting, screaming. 0.99

01:02:48.000 I'm like, holy, what the fuck is that? 0.99

01:02:50.000 In the ceiling? 0.99

01:02:51.000 In the ceiling.

01:02:52.000 I start hitting the ceiling with the broom.

01:02:54.000 Oh my god.

01:02:55.000 I start hitting the closets, like, trying to scare them. 1.00

01:03:00.000 And then, eventually, the motherfucker ate through the wall. 0.99

01:03:05.000 One day I was laying on the couch and I just suddenly open my eyes and look up. 1.00

01:03:11.000 And he's just fucking looking at me. 0.95

01:03:13.000 We make eye contact and it's like... 1.00

01:03:15.000 It's a fucking... 1.00

01:03:17.000 It's a standoff. 1.00

01:03:19.000 It's about to be, you know, like a Mexican shootout.

01:03:23.000 That is hilarious.

01:03:25.000 It was crazy.

01:03:27.000 So then my...

01:03:29.000 Then my Greek landlord decided to put traps out and I think that he... 0.90

01:03:37.000 Literally slaughtered about 60 of them from the neighborhood.

01:03:39.000 Oh my god.

01:03:41.000 It's not his fault.

01:03:42.000 It's not his fault.

01:03:43.000 It was in the trap.

01:03:44.000 The trap.

01:03:44.000 Now listen.

01:03:46.000 They did bad things to the neighborhood.

01:03:48.000 They would eat through lines.

01:03:52.000 Poor little squirrel. 0.99

01:03:55.000 Nobody gives a fuck about rats. 1.00

01:03:56.000 If he killed 60 rats, it would be like, good, kill 60,000. 1.00

01:03:59.000 Man, I now feel bad about that fucking shit. 1.00

01:04:01.000 Don't feel bad. 1.00

01:04:02.000 Because if you kill- Why is it if you kill squirrels, people get bummed out? 0.99

01:04:07.000 But if you kill rats, people are like, yeah, you gotta kill them. 1.00

01:04:10.000 Shouldn't fucking kill anything, but at the end of the day, shit happens. 1.00

01:04:13.000 Yeah, but if you're killing something with a trap, you're definitely trying to kill it. 1.00

01:04:17.000 Yeah, I had no involvement.

01:04:21.000 But I'm just wondering why we so readily accept killing rats but not squirrels.

01:04:25.000 How do rats feel about that?

01:04:27.000 It's viewed as vermin.

01:04:28.000 I feel like squirrels are viewed as vermin to a lot of people.

01:04:31.000 I feel like that's the case.

01:04:34.000 Like an issue.

01:04:35.000 Like a big feral hog. 1.00

01:04:38.000 It's the same shit. 1.00

01:04:39.000 No. 1.00

01:04:40.000 In certain parts of the world, they're considered just as much of a nuisance as a rat.

01:04:45.000 Wow, that's crazy.

01:04:46.000 Where?

01:04:47.000 Certain islands.

01:04:49.000 Squirrels are just thinking of them as rats.

01:04:51.000 What?

01:04:51.000 They think of them like rats?

01:04:52.000 I feel like squirrels, just in New York, a lot of people are just fucking scared of squirrels. 0.89

01:04:59.000 Well, do you know the difference between tree squirrels, those cute ones that everybody likes, and those ground squirrels? 0.95

01:05:04.000 Mm-mm.

01:05:05.000 Dude. 1.00

01:05:06.000 Ground squirrels are fucking crazy. 1.00

01:05:09.000 Ground squirrels... 0.99

01:05:10.000 I was on this ranch in California, and they have a ground squirrel problem, and we're driving down this road, and as we're driving down this road, you're watching these little tiny creatures pop their head out of the ground, run across, and jump into another hole.

01:05:25.000 There's holes all over the place.

01:05:28.000 And what are they growing crops over there?

01:05:29.000 They were trying to... 0.99

01:05:30.000 They got a bunch of different shit that grow in there. 0.99

01:05:32.000 They have... 0.99

01:05:33.000 They have cattle that are grazing.

01:05:34.000 They have a bunch of different things going on there. 1.00

01:05:36.000 They're fucking ruining the system. 0.98

01:05:37.000 They can't do anything about these things. 1.00

01:05:39.000 There's so many of them.

01:05:40.000 They say there's so many ground squirrels that the biomass of these things is like a biomass of a giant herd of cattle or something like that.

01:05:48.000 There's so many of them.

01:05:50.000 It's like a hundred cows. 0.99

01:05:52.000 That's how many of these little fucking ground squirrels are just running around this area. 1.00

01:05:55.000 So what do they do? 0.99

01:05:56.000 I saw that they do these...

01:05:59.000 Where it gives them a shock.

01:06:00.000 They have these things where they put food in, and it kills them humanely.

01:06:05.000 It shocks them.

01:06:06.000 I don't know how many there are.

01:06:07.000 I don't know if they know.

01:06:08.000 Like, if you're driving down the road, and you just keep seeing these little heads pop up and run across.

01:06:13.000 There's another one.

01:06:13.000 Bang!

01:06:14.000 There's another one.

01:06:14.000 Bang!

01:06:15.000 Pop up, run across.

01:06:16.000 Little tiny thing, little tiny road, and boom! 0.95

01:06:18.000 Jumps in a hole.

01:06:19.000 Boom! 0.99

01:06:19.000 Jumps in a hole. 0.99

01:06:20.000 And you watch them scramble all across the ground.

01:06:22.000 You're like, whoa! 0.98

01:06:23.000 If these were rats, I would be freaking the fuck out right now. 0.99

01:06:27.000 Flippin'. 0.99

01:06:28.000 I'd be going, Jesus, look at all these rats! 1.00

01:06:31.000 If you were driving down New York City and that's what you saw with rats, just popping up and running across, popping in the hole, everybody would be like, let's get the fuck out of here! 1.00

01:06:42.000 This place is overrun! 0.99

01:06:43.000 We gotta get out of the city!

01:06:45.000 It would be like that scene in Aliens where the dude was talking about nuking it from orbit.

01:06:49.000 Straight up.

01:06:50.000 We gotta get out of the city.

01:06:51.000 We gotta poison everything.

01:06:53.000 We gotta take five years off the city and then we can return.

01:06:56.000 We just poison everything there for five years.

01:06:58.000 It's heavy.

01:06:59.000 But these little ground squirrels, they're a little cuter.

01:07:02.000 Slightly cuter.

01:07:04.000 So they're more accepted.

01:07:07.000 Like, all those little animals are cute.

01:07:10.000 Little rats, not that cute.

01:07:13.000 Not really into them.

01:07:14.000 There's something about them.

01:07:15.000 They're just too untrustworthy. 0.99

01:07:18.000 They're too rat-like. 0.99

01:07:19.000 Yeah.

01:07:22.000 People that have rats for pets, though, they love them.

01:07:24.000 It's the same thing.

01:07:25.000 I mean, if you have a domesticated animal and it grows up with you in its care for its entire life, then you become like family, you know, just like a dog or a cat.

01:07:34.000 But if you've ever been around a feral cat and you've ever been around a feral dog, like, ooh, that can be really scary.

01:07:42.000 I had a cat that I... My mother rescued a cat when I was younger. 0.99

01:07:48.000 And the fucking cat attacked me. 0.99

01:07:50.000 Ooh. 1.00

01:07:51.000 Was it a feral cat?

01:07:52.000 It was.

01:07:53.000 It was a white cat and it was...

01:07:56.000 It was abused.

01:07:57.000 Jesus Christ.

01:07:58.000 And I wasn't like, you know... 0.99

01:08:00.000 I was fucking with it a little bit, like, you know... 0.98

01:08:02.000 That's scary. 1.00

01:08:03.000 Grabbing its neck and shit. 1.00

01:08:04.000 Like, you know, the back where it's skin... 1.00

01:08:07.000 And he fucking snapped and bit the shit out of me and scratched me. 0.99

01:08:11.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00

01:08:12.000 Went nuts, he wouldn't stop. 1.00

01:08:14.000 Fuck, man. 1.00

01:08:15.000 But it's alright. 1.00

01:08:17.000 I fucked with him. 1.00

01:08:19.000 I deserved it. 1.00

01:08:21.000 They can be terrifying, though.

01:08:23.000 It's amazing how powerful a little cat is.

01:08:27.000 They're ferocious.

01:08:29.000 It's non-stop.

01:08:30.000 They're too quick.

01:08:32.000 You don't know what to do. 0.99

01:08:33.000 And you panic because, like, what the fuck is this? 1.00

01:08:37.000 Fucking thing. 1.00

01:08:38.000 He's attacking me? 1.00

01:08:39.000 What is this?

01:08:40.000 Yeah.

01:08:40.000 It's not a human.

01:08:41.000 And they're gonna go full bore, whereas you're gonna kind of pull back a little.

01:08:48.000 It's such a better design as far as killing things.

01:08:52.000 Their bodies are so well designed.

01:08:55.000 When you watch that guy that was jumping across those buildings... 1.00

01:08:58.000 Cats would be like, bitch, I do that all day. 1.00

01:09:01.000 Easy. 1.00

01:09:02.000 Easy.

01:09:02.000 They do that so gently around my house.

01:09:05.000 You know, they just leap all of a sudden, boom, they're on the couch.

01:09:08.000 Leap, boom, they're on the table.

01:09:10.000 Right.

01:09:10.000 Walk across, leap, boom, they're on the ground.

01:09:13.000 They walk on railings, balancing act on railings.

01:09:16.000 What about those, um, I love watching those shows on National Geographic, like when they make the kill.

01:09:23.000 Then they drag it all the way up into the tree.

01:09:25.000 Oh, like leopards. 1.00

01:09:26.000 You know, like leopards dragging a moose up into the fucking... 1.00

01:09:30.000 Like, you kidding me? 1.00

01:09:32.000 They're so scary.

01:09:34.000 That's a design.

01:09:36.000 They grab them with their teeth. 0.96

01:09:37.000 Look at this leopard.

01:09:38.000 This is the recent one.

01:09:39.000 Yeah.

01:09:40.000 Oh, my God.

01:09:41.000 This was in India, right?

01:09:42.000 It got loose and was just jacking people.

01:09:45.000 Look at that.

01:09:46.000 Oh, my God.

01:09:47.000 Just jumped up and bit that guy.

01:09:49.000 Oh, my God.

01:09:51.000 Can you jump in the water?

01:09:52.000 Is that safe or no?

01:09:53.000 Like, can they swim?

01:09:54.000 I don't think they swim.

01:09:56.000 I think that lepers won't jump in the water.

01:09:58.000 But what if they do, man?

01:09:58.000 Oh my god, look at this thing biting him.

01:10:00.000 Oh, man, he's... 1.00

01:10:02.000 That guy got fucked up. 1.00

01:10:04.000 Someone threw him a fucking stick. 1.00

01:10:06.000 You saw someone throw him a stick? 1.00

01:10:08.000 Yeah, Jesus Christ, that's terrifying, man. 0.99

01:10:12.000 That is fucking terrifying. 0.99

01:10:14.000 That animal's so powerful, too. 1.00

01:10:17.000 That's a big cat.

01:10:19.000 That thing looked like it was 150 pounds. 0.90

01:10:21.000 At least.

01:10:21.000 Oof.

01:10:23.000 Just imagine a 150 pound house cat fucking you up. 1.00

01:10:30.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:10:31.000 Fuck all that, dude. 1.00

01:10:33.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:10:34.000 Woo! 0.99

01:10:37.000 We're so poorly designed.

01:10:38.000 When it comes to being able to defend ourselves against something like that, we're so poorly designed.

01:10:44.000 It's amazing.

01:10:46.000 Other animals have such a way better shot.

01:10:49.000 Athletically.

01:10:51.000 Even chimps.

01:10:53.000 Chimps are so much stronger than us.

01:10:54.000 They have a way better shot at surviving a cat attack. 1.00

01:10:57.000 They're fucking swinging from trees going nuts. 0.99

01:10:59.000 That was one of the things they found about those big giant chimps in the Congo that they nest on the ground like gorillas. 1.00

01:11:05.000 Gorillas nest on the ground because nobody wants to fuck with a gorilla. 1.00

01:11:08.000 Cats don't want to fuck with a gorilla. 1.00

01:11:10.000 It's like too much work. 1.00

01:11:11.000 You could easily get your jaw broke.

01:11:13.000 You could easily get your leg broke. 0.91

01:11:15.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:11:16.000 They can't fuck with gorillas. 1.00

01:11:17.000 It's too hard. 1.00

01:11:18.000 They might catch a baby slipping.

01:11:19.000 You know, they might be able to catch a baby.

01:11:21.000 Like, you know, if he gets separated from his mom at the right...

01:11:25.000 You know, that's possible.

01:11:26.000 But like a regular-sized gorilla?

01:11:28.000 Good luck. 0.99

01:11:29.000 No fucking way. 1.00

01:11:30.000 They'll have to be stalking. 1.00

01:11:32.000 Yeah.

01:11:32.000 So they sleep in the ground where chimps sleep in the trees.

01:11:35.000 Chimps still gotta be careful. 0.89

01:11:36.000 But they found these big giant chimps in the Congo.

01:11:40.000 They call them the Beely Ape or the Bondo Ape.

01:11:43.000 And, um...

01:11:45.000 They were just a legend for the longest time.

01:11:48.000 They were in that book, Michael Crichton's book?

01:11:50.000 Is that who it was?

01:11:50.000 The Congo?

01:11:51.000 Is that who wrote that?

01:11:52.000 I've seen the movie.

01:11:54.000 Was it Crichton that wrote that?

01:11:55.000 Did you see that movie, Congo?

01:11:57.000 Yeah. 0.98

01:11:57.000 It was kind of silly. 0.98

01:11:58.000 Yeah, it was terrible. 0.96

01:11:59.000 It was terrible.

01:12:00.000 Who's that guy with the accent?

01:12:01.000 You know, the one that's always in all those movies. 0.79

01:12:03.000 The weirdo.

01:12:04.000 Which guy's that? 1.00

01:12:05.000 Fucking weird guy. 0.99

01:12:09.000 He was like the... 1.00

01:12:10.000 He was the guide. 0.97

01:12:11.000 He was terrible.

01:12:12.000 He's in like...

01:12:13.000 I don't remember who he was.

01:12:14.000 You'll see his face. 1.00

01:12:15.000 He's like, oh, this fucking guy. 1.00

01:12:16.000 It was just not a very good movie. 1.00

01:12:19.000 Okay.

01:12:19.000 That guy?

01:12:19.000 That's not him.

01:12:20.000 That's not him.

01:12:21.000 But that was the guy from the Congo.

01:12:22.000 Where's the doctor?

01:12:24.000 Her?

01:12:25.000 Nah, there's another one.

01:12:26.000 The one who was looking for...

01:12:27.000 Oh, there he is.

01:12:28.000 What?

01:12:29.000 Who?

01:12:29.000 There he is.

01:12:30.000 Oh.

01:12:31.000 Timothy...

01:12:32.000 That guy?

01:12:34.000 You've seen him before.

01:12:35.000 But that guy's great.

01:12:36.000 That's the guy from Rocky Horror Picture Show.

01:12:38.000 Exactly. 1.00

01:12:39.000 That fucking guy. 1.00

01:12:41.000 Tim Curry. 1.00

01:12:42.000 Tim Curry.

01:12:43.000 Thank you.

01:12:45.000 Yeah.

01:12:46.000 Yeah, I like him.

01:12:48.000 Well, that movie dealt with...

01:12:50.000 See that monkey up there?

01:12:51.000 That one picture.

01:12:52.000 That's supposedly what these giant chimps look like.

01:12:57.000 So in the movie, they were these fictional animals that were super smart and they were really big.

01:13:05.000 But it's based on this thing.

01:13:07.000 This is a real one.

01:13:09.000 Wow.

01:13:10.000 This is a real one that someone had killed at the turn of the century.

01:13:14.000 That's one that they shot at an airport in Africa.

01:13:18.000 Look at the size of that thing in comparison to those men.

01:13:21.000 You're talking about a chimp that could get to be like 400 pounds. 1.00

01:13:25.000 They're enormous. 1.00

01:13:26.000 That is ridiculous. 0.99

01:13:27.000 Yeah, and so they sleep on the ground, just like gorillas do. 1.00

01:13:31.000 And there's a small population of them.

01:13:33.000 They just recently found them?

01:13:34.000 Well, there's a Swiss, I think there's a Swiss wildlife photographer named Carl Armand, and he took some photos of them with a camera trap.

01:13:43.000 Put up a photo, camera trap, Bondo ape.

01:13:47.000 I think I'm saying his name right, Carl Armand.

01:13:50.000 But he...

01:13:52.000 Yeah, the upper left.

01:13:53.000 That's it.

01:13:55.000 Those photos.

01:13:56.000 Yeah, that's the same thing.

01:13:57.000 See, one of them, what does it say?

01:14:00.000 Carl Amman.

01:14:02.000 Is that one also in...

01:14:03.000 Just for everybody, it's A... Excuse me.

01:14:06.000 Carl, K-A-R-L-A-M-M-A-N-N. And he got these camera trap photos of them walking upright. 1.00

01:14:15.000 And that was the most fucked up thing about it. 0.99

01:14:17.000 Holy shit, I didn't even realize what I was looking at. 1.00

01:14:20.000 Yeah, that's a six foot tall chimp that's walking upright. 1.00

01:14:27.000 I mean, they're really big.

01:14:29.000 They're way bigger than a regular chimp. 0.91

01:14:31.000 And they have a crest in their head like gorillas do. 0.99

01:14:34.000 You know, gorillas are one of the few primates that has, if you look at its skull...

01:14:39.000 They have a crest in the skull where these massive chewing muscles and biting muscles all sort of congregate on their head.

01:14:48.000 They have these huge jaw muscles and these huge clampdown muscles.

01:14:53.000 And they have this cleft in the top of their head.

01:14:56.000 I pull up Bondo ape skull and they found the skulls of these things.

01:15:04.000 And at first they were like, okay, is this a hybrid? 0.82

01:15:07.000 Like, what is this?

01:15:09.000 See how it has like a crest in the top of the head?

01:15:13.000 So now that they know that it's a real animal, they're like, whoa, this is the first chimp they've ever found that has a crest like this.

01:15:19.000 Look at it.

01:15:20.000 And it's also, they were thinking it was some sort of a hybrid.

01:15:24.000 They were thinking like maybe it was part gorilla, part chimp.

01:15:29.000 Is that possible?

01:15:30.000 But then the genetics, they've gotten, I think, from stool samples and some other methods of acquiring them.

01:15:39.000 They think that it's just its own kind of chimp.

01:15:42.000 Just a breed that only exists in this one area. 1.00

01:15:47.000 Pretty fucking crazy. 0.90

01:15:49.000 You think about it, like, they've only had photos of this thing since this guy, Carl Amann, in the, I think, the 90s he did that, right? 0.98

01:15:59.000 Yeah.

01:16:01.000 What does it say as far as when he first got the photos on it?

01:16:05.000 I guess it's apparently been, like, legend.

01:16:08.000 But the Congo is giant, man.

01:16:10.000 It's like the United States.

01:16:11.000 It's huge.

01:16:12.000 Like, the Congo rainforest, if you look at it on a map...

01:16:17.000 They'll take the actual size of the US and put it in the Congo. 0.97

01:16:22.000 You can put it in the Congo. 0.93

01:16:24.000 You almost can.

01:16:25.000 It's pretty close.

01:16:26.000 It's pretty close.

01:16:27.000 It's basically the size of the United States, give or take. 0.99

01:16:30.000 Even if it was half the size, it's fucking crazy. 0.97

01:16:33.000 Who the hell knows what's in there? 0.98

01:16:34.000 Yeah, exactly.

01:16:35.000 You can never find everything that's there.

01:16:37.000 But this one area where this thing lives is, of course, they're probably, like, making cell phones out of there or something like that, pulling minerals out of the ground that they need for, you know, the iWatch or something.

01:16:52.000 So who knows?

01:16:53.000 I mean...

01:16:54.000 This is how big it is?

01:16:57.000 Two-thirds the size of Western Europe.

01:16:59.000 Two-thirds the size of Western Europe.

01:17:01.000 Jesus Christ.

01:17:03.000 What does it look like in comparison to the United States?

01:17:09.000 I had a picture of it.

01:17:10.000 It covered about half the U.S., but I think it was the DR of the Congo, so I'm not sure if it's a different size. 0.91

01:17:19.000 That's a fucking pretty heavy-duty piece right there. 0.97

01:17:21.000 Oh, my God. 0.99

01:17:23.000 Home Midwest.

01:17:24.000 I definitely exaggerated.

01:17:26.000 But it's still unbelievably huge.

01:17:31.000 Just look.

01:17:32.000 It goes from the bottom of the United States all the way up to Canada.

01:17:36.000 But only, I would say, like a third of the size.

01:17:40.000 Slightly bigger than Alaska, maybe?

01:17:43.000 Definitely bigger than Alaska.

01:17:44.000 Alaska's pretty big, too.

01:17:45.000 How much is it?

01:17:46.000 It's not really half.

01:17:47.000 It doesn't look like half to me.

01:17:48.000 It looks more like a third.

01:17:51.000 Like, scroll down a little so we can see it better.

01:17:54.000 Yeah.

01:17:55.000 Yeah, that doesn't really look like half to me.

01:17:57.000 Does it?

01:17:59.000 Looks like slightly...

01:18:00.000 Yeah, slightly less than half.

01:18:03.000 Maybe 40% or something like that.

01:18:05.000 Yeah.

01:18:06.000 And almost 80% of people have AIDS. Really?

01:18:11.000 That's what it says.

01:18:12.000 80% of the people in the Congo have AIDS? More likely.

01:18:16.000 Are likely to have HIV AIDS. Wow.

01:18:19.000 Heavy duty.

01:18:20.000 So, if you go to the condo, the Congo will wear a condom, right? 1.00

01:18:24.000 Well, we knew that. 1.00

01:18:26.000 You gotta wear the full body condom like fucking Naked Gunny. 0.99

01:18:30.000 It's just insane how diverse... 1.00

01:18:34.000 That part of the world is.

01:18:36.000 Like the amount of different animals that exist in that one crazy rainforest area. 0.99

01:18:42.000 They have all sorts of wild shit in there. 0.97

01:18:44.000 We were looking at videos of that thing last night. 1.00

01:18:46.000 That shoebill bird.

01:18:47.000 That giant prehistoric looking dinosaur bird.

01:18:51.000 That lives in the Congo too.

01:18:53.000 The one with the long...

01:18:54.000 Yeah, crazy long hatchet face. 0.68

01:18:56.000 It's got like a long battle axe for a face. 0.83

01:18:59.000 It's like a five foot tall bird. 1.00

01:19:01.000 Oh, scary fucking things. 1.00

01:19:03.000 Imagine getting chased down by one of those. 1.00

01:19:05.000 Yeah, there it is.

01:19:06.000 It's two days in a row the shoe bell has made a... 0.99

01:19:09.000 Look at the fucking size of that thing. 0.99

01:19:13.000 That thing looks crazy. 1.00

01:19:15.000 It just looks like he's demented. 0.92

01:19:17.000 That one doesn't look nearly as tall as five feet.

01:19:19.000 Is five feet as big as they get? 1.00

01:19:21.000 Look at the fucking eyes in that thing, man. 1.00

01:19:23.000 He's giving it a rat. 1.00

01:19:25.000 Look how stupid it is, too. 1.00

01:19:27.000 Yeah, right? 1.00

01:19:27.000 It's an idiot. 1.00

01:19:28.000 Look at it. 1.00

01:19:28.000 It's so dumb. 1.00

01:19:30.000 Just a dumb old dinosaur. 1.00

01:19:32.000 That's a dinosaur, man. 1.00

01:19:37.000 I mean, for real.

01:19:38.000 What are we looking at?

01:19:39.000 Is this a real animal? 1.00

01:19:40.000 Are you fucking shitting me? 1.00

01:19:42.000 This looks like Avatar. 1.00

01:19:44.000 This looks like some Avatar shit. 0.99

01:19:46.000 It really does. 1.00

01:19:47.000 The fact that that is a real animal. 0.98

01:19:49.000 That this lady is feeding this animal rats. 1.00

01:19:53.000 Look at it. 1.00

01:19:53.000 It's gulping down mice and fish and shit. 1.00

01:19:56.000 Look at the face on that thing. 1.00

01:20:00.000 Look at its eye. 1.00

01:20:01.000 It's like fucking hatchet face from Cry Baby. 1.00

01:20:03.000 Look at its fucking eyes. 1.00

01:20:06.000 It's like, I don't believe that you really can tell how intelligent someone is if you look into their eyes, but I do believe you can see when something's dumb as fuck. 1.00

01:20:19.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.98

01:20:21.000 Like, you can't tell looking at somebody how smart they are, but you can definitely tell looking at that thing there's not a whole lot going on.

01:20:27.000 There's like some simple wiring. 1.00

01:20:31.000 Fuck that thing. 1.00

01:20:33.000 Jesus Christ, Jamie. 1.00

01:20:34.000 Yo, that's crazy.

01:20:35.000 Look at this photo. 1.00

01:20:36.000 Oh, shit. 0.99

01:20:38.000 Jamie just pulled up a photo of this bird. 1.00

01:20:41.000 That's pretty fucking amazing, Lucan. 0.65

01:20:43.000 Dude, someone needs to make a horror movie where these things just, you know, someone lets them out of a lab in Florida. 0.96

01:20:49.000 You know, there's like a Florida University lab.

01:20:51.000 And they get out and they start breeding.

01:20:53.000 And they start talking to each other.

01:20:55.000 That looks like one of those angry birds from the thing, from the game, right?

01:20:59.000 The eyes.

01:21:00.000 Did they use one of those?

01:21:01.000 The eyes. 1.00

01:21:02.000 Shit. 1.00

01:21:03.000 Those dead eyes. 1.00

01:21:04.000 Those dead dinosaur eyes.

01:21:07.000 Those eyes are the reason why we have houses. 0.99

01:21:09.000 Yo, that's fucking creepy, yo. 0.99

01:21:10.000 That's creeping me the fuck out. 0.99

01:21:12.000 Those eyes are the reason why we have houses and weapons.

01:21:15.000 Those houses are the reason why we figured out fire and communication. 1.00

01:21:20.000 We had to figure out how to not get eaten by shit like that. 0.99

01:21:24.000 Look at that thing. 1.00

01:21:25.000 Jesus fucking Christ. 1.00

01:21:27.000 Now imagine that this is in the same sort of vein, as far as animals go, as that terror bird. 0.99

01:21:33.000 Except it's considerably smaller.

01:21:35.000 Where that terror bird was like seven feet tall. 0.68

01:21:38.000 And lived in North America.

01:21:40.000 Lived in North America while people were alive.

01:21:44.000 These things were giant.

01:21:46.000 And they were running around.

01:21:48.000 Like, look at the photo with the soldier there, Jamie.

01:21:51.000 Look at this. 0.99

01:21:52.000 Look how big these fucking things were. 1.00

01:21:55.000 What the fuck? 1.00

01:21:56.000 Yeah, what the fuck? 1.00

01:21:57.000 These things lived while people were alive, right? 1.00

01:22:00.000 Like, when did these terror birds exist?

01:22:02.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:22:04.000 Fuck that thing. 1.00

01:22:07.000 Just fuck that thing. 1.00

01:22:10.000 That shit is crazy looking. 1.00

01:22:13.000 It's nine feet tall. 1.00

01:22:15.000 It's a nine foot tall giant fucking bird, man. 1.00

01:22:18.000 When did the thing live? 1.00

01:22:23.000 1.5 million years ago?

01:22:25.000 Is that what it says?

01:22:26.000 That's not that long.

01:22:27.000 What's it say, Jamie?

01:22:29.000 15 or 1.5?

01:22:32.000 2.5 million years ago.

01:22:33.000 2.5 million years ago.

01:22:35.000 Alright, so that's definitely not people.

01:22:37.000 Someone was there.

01:22:38.000 Someone was there. 0.99

01:22:39.000 Some silly monkeys. 0.99

01:22:40.000 Something was there. 1.00

01:22:42.000 But what year do you think monkeys started figuring out how to start using weapons and shit? 0.99

01:22:49.000 Like, what year was it that they figured out, like, the very first subhuman hominid that was smart as fuck that was figuring out how to, like, make a weapon? 1.00

01:23:00.000 It would have to have been them picking up some sort of branch or some sort of rock and throwing it. 0.98

01:23:07.000 Maybe.

01:23:07.000 That's the first thought of using a weapon, no?

01:23:09.000 Rock.

01:23:10.000 Maybe.

01:23:11.000 I would wonder if it would be that or a stick.

01:23:14.000 Like, to beat something with a stick or to throw a rock.

01:23:17.000 Like, which would be the first one they figured out.

01:23:20.000 But what year do you think...

01:23:22.000 I mean, I wonder how long it was ago that our ancestors first started developing a weapon.

01:23:29.000 Like something to either kill, something to eat, or something to defend themselves.

01:23:33.000 I'm looking a little farther.

01:23:34.000 There's some reports from Uruguay saying that these might be dated to 450,000 or 17,000 years ago.

01:23:42.000 17,000 years ago.

01:23:44.000 Those claims are being debated.

01:23:45.000 That's what I had heard.

01:23:46.000 It's more in the realm.

01:23:47.000 I think I had heard it was like 35,000 years ago they think that some of them were living in North America.

01:24:03.000 It was all pre-ice age either way because the ice age was 10,000 years ago. 0.99

01:24:09.000 This whole motherfucker was just frozen solid. 0.99

01:24:12.000 That's hard to imagine. 1.00

01:24:16.000 Listen, I question everything. 0.99

01:24:19.000 I don't know what the fuck is going on. 0.99

01:24:21.000 Who knows what's happening? 0.99

01:24:23.000 But I like watching ancient aliens.

01:24:27.000 I do too.

01:24:28.000 I wish it was real.

01:24:30.000 I wish it was all real.

01:24:31.000 I wish it was too.

01:24:33.000 I hope they're right. 1.00

01:24:33.000 I hope they're right about a lot of shit. 1.00

01:24:36.000 It would be so much more fun if aliens had been here and contacted us and left information. 1.00

01:24:42.000 It would be so much more fun.

01:24:44.000 It would be incredible.

01:24:45.000 Than...

01:24:46.000 And to actually be alive to find that out?

01:24:48.000 Yeah.

01:24:49.000 I think it's totally possible that something could get way smarter than us and can travel from some other place.

01:24:57.000 It's also totally possible that it's never happened yet. 1.00

01:25:01.000 It's totally possible that people are just full of shit. 0.99

01:25:04.000 It's also totally possible that our experience on Earth has been broken up a bunch of times by huge disasters. 0.99

01:25:11.000 And I think that this is one of those things that this guy Graham Hancock is trying to prove and is doing a fantastic job of sort of documenting the way he describes it, that we're a civilization with amnesia.

01:25:24.000 It's really interesting stuff, man, because he's saying essentially what probably happened was human beings invented a bunch of really cool shit, developed a bunch of great technology, had made sophisticated societies and cultures, and then BOOM! Boom! 0.63

01:25:40.000 A fucking rock from the sky comes down. 1.00

01:25:41.000 Start over. 1.00

01:25:42.000 Flattens everything. 0.99

01:25:43.000 Kills a giant chunk of the people. 1.00

01:25:46.000 Fucks up all the infrastructure. 0.99

01:25:47.000 Chaos. 0.89

01:25:48.000 Disorder.

01:25:49.000 And then things are fine for another few hundred years.

01:25:52.000 And boom! 0.98

01:25:53.000 A new one hits.

01:25:54.000 And they're all throughout Europe. 0.98

01:25:55.000 They've proven it now that there's this nuclear glass shit all throughout Europe and in Asia as well. 0.99

01:26:01.000 The vitrification. 0.95

01:26:02.000 And it's all around 10,000 years ago.

01:26:04.000 How crazy is that?

01:26:05.000 It's unexplainable, right?

01:26:07.000 It's insane.

01:26:08.000 They think that that's what happened, that 10,000 to 12,000 years ago, all of Europe was pelted with rocks. 0.97

01:26:17.000 It's fucking nuts and that people had to start over after that and that all of our stories about Cataclysms and you know the Noah and the ark and all that shit about keeping keeping societies alive Whether it's like the epic of Gilgamesh all these different stories that are real similar real similar tale of someone like trying to keep humanity alive in the face of this chaotic Disaster all of those represent the same stories all those represents the things that ended the fucking ice age and Rocks from the 0.80

01:26:47.000 sky 10,000 years ago, Jamie. 1.00

01:26:50.000 Heavy shit. 1.00

01:26:51.000 Too heavy for me! 1.00

01:26:52.000 You got me too high, you fuck. 1.00

01:26:55.000 There's fucking three joints left, bro. 1.00

01:26:57.000 Actually, there's four. 0.99

01:26:59.000 Oh, we can't.

01:27:01.000 We can't keep going.

01:27:02.000 We'll forget what we already talked about.

01:27:04.000 We'll repeat ourselves.

01:27:05.000 We are a society with amnesia.

01:27:07.000 Oh, definitely wouldn't be smoking this kind of weed.

01:27:10.000 You get all kinds of amnesia.

01:27:11.000 This is fire, too.

01:27:12.000 Just know that about that.

01:27:15.000 So when you're going on these trips, do you base these trips on places you want to eat? 0.91

01:27:20.000 Do you base these trips on you're already touring there and you say, well, fuck it, let's combine the two together? 0.93

01:27:26.000 Yep, pretty much. 0.91

01:27:27.000 I get to go to cool places for music.

01:27:31.000 I get to go to a lot of amazing countries.

01:27:34.000 I've been to Africa.

01:27:35.000 I've been pretty much all over.

01:27:38.000 Not Asia yet, all over Europe. 0.74

01:27:41.000 All over America.

01:27:43.000 And pretty much people want to take me out to these restaurants because they know I appreciate it.

01:27:50.000 They know what I'm about.

01:27:51.000 Through my lyrics and through seeing me and getting to know me on that type of level where you almost feel like you know me, people feel like they need to show me the right way in their city.

01:28:07.000 I have to be taken care of.

01:28:09.000 You know?

01:28:10.000 And it's only right.

01:28:11.000 I like to be taken care of.

01:28:13.000 And, you know, I have an incredible team over at Vice and Munchies and Viceland that, you know, they get the job done.

01:28:21.000 They work.

01:28:22.000 Well, once you start doing a show like this, then people start hearing about it, then, you know, you get all the people that are contacting you with great suggestions, and it sort of makes itself, like, you figure a chart just based on all these people trying to get you to go to their spots, right?

01:28:36.000 Yeah, well, you know, a lot of it is organic, though.

01:28:38.000 People are genuinely fans of the music and genuinely fans of the show.

01:28:41.000 Yeah.

01:28:44.000 A lot of the times, they don't want to ask to be on it.

01:28:48.000 I see people throwing the little hints.

01:28:54.000 Come by.

01:28:55.000 Bring the guys.

01:28:56.000 Is this something you planned out, or is this just something that sort of came along and just seemed like a natural thing to do?

01:29:02.000 Yeah, it just came along.

01:29:03.000 I was getting filmed in the kitchen cooking, and it was kind of cool.

01:29:08.000 I always...

01:29:10.000 Growing up watching these shows, these dudes being rock stars now, I was like, why can't I do that? 0.99

01:29:18.000 Look at fucking Guy Fieri. 0.98

01:29:20.000 Guy Fieri? 1.00

01:29:21.000 Yeah.

01:29:21.000 That guy?

01:29:23.000 My bad.

01:29:24.000 Guy Fieri.

01:29:25.000 I said it with the intensive Fieri.

01:29:27.000 Is that how you're supposed to say it?

01:29:28.000 It's alright.

01:29:30.000 It's a little accent.

01:29:32.000 Look at him.

01:29:33.000 Look at him.

01:29:34.000 Look at him.

01:29:35.000 Look at him.

01:29:36.000 Look at him.

01:29:36.000 There he is.

01:29:37.000 Look at this guy.

01:29:38.000 What else is he gonna do besides what he does?

01:29:42.000 He could be in Nickelback.

01:29:43.000 He could be in Nickelback.

01:29:44.000 He could be in...

01:29:45.000 What was the one?

01:29:47.000 I'm an All-Star.

01:29:48.000 He could rock that.

01:29:50.000 What is that?

01:29:51.000 Smash Mouth. 0.97

01:29:52.000 He looks like the lead singer of Smash Mouth.

01:29:54.000 Oh, hey now.

01:29:55.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:29:56.000 Yeah.

01:29:57.000 Yeah.

01:29:58.000 Well, he's got his...

01:29:59.000 He figured out his own spot.

01:30:00.000 Can you just scroll up for a second?

01:30:03.000 Go to the one with the flames on his shirt.

01:30:06.000 Ugh.

01:30:08.000 To the right. 0.99

01:30:10.000 Oh, so ridiculous. 0.99

01:30:12.000 Yes. 0.97

01:30:13.000 He actually, they were like, get crazy while he was taking these pictures, and he did that, and that's forever etched in time.

01:30:20.000 It's just hilarious that he's got such a crafted thing going on.

01:30:26.000 He's a rock star.

01:30:28.000 Rock star.

01:30:30.000 Cook guy.

01:30:31.000 Let me ask you something.

01:30:32.000 Do you think...

01:30:33.000 Seems like a nice guy.

01:30:34.000 No, that's what I'm saying.

01:30:35.000 Do you think that this is a shtick?

01:30:37.000 Yeah, he's smart.

01:30:39.000 He decided to make himself...

01:30:41.000 Look, you look at a guy like Donald Trump. 0.89

01:30:44.000 Everybody knows that he has this crazy hair.

01:30:46.000 You don't think that Donald Trump could get a better haircut?

01:30:49.000 Oh yeah, he plays into it for sure. 1.00

01:30:50.000 It's ridiculous. 0.98

01:30:51.000 It's part of his flair is that he's pulling it off with this goofy haircut. 0.98

01:30:55.000 He's got billions of dollars and he's got this hair helmet that he's got on.

01:31:00.000 Same with Don King.

01:31:01.000 It's a legendary hair helmet.

01:31:03.000 Don King, man.

01:31:04.000 A lot of guys did that.

01:31:06.000 They had sort of a wacky look on purpose, right?

01:31:10.000 Mm-hmm.

01:31:11.000 I thought of this yesterday.

01:31:12.000 Is there any chance Donald Trump's trolling in some sort of performance piece for like a movie?

01:31:17.000 I think Donald Trump is a guy who has full belief in his ability to run this country.

01:31:26.000 Whether or not he can actually run the country, I don't think it's an act.

01:31:31.000 I think he has full belief that he can do it.

01:31:34.000 It is bizarre to see because it's freaking people out.

01:31:39.000 I think one of the more fascinating things about this election is how people are so freaked out that he's pretty much in command right now.

01:31:47.000 There's thoughts, there's like panic that he could, that there's a possibility he could be the president.

01:31:53.000 Oh, it's very likely.

01:31:55.000 You think that it's very likely?

01:31:57.000 I think if things keep going the way they're going right now, It looks to me like he's gonna be the president. 1.00

01:32:04.000 Are the others putting their fucking foots in their mouth? 0.99

01:32:07.000 What is the issue? 1.00

01:32:08.000 Why is he shining?

01:32:09.000 I don't understand.

01:32:10.000 Is it the internet age?

01:32:12.000 Is it the social media age that's making this guy into this figure almost like the Jordan face?

01:32:20.000 The Jordan face. 0.89

01:32:21.000 The meme?

01:32:22.000 It's like an iconic thing.

01:32:24.000 Do you know about the...

01:32:24.000 Pull up the Jordan face.

01:32:27.000 Donald Trump is becoming the fucking Jordan face, man. 1.00

01:32:30.000 The crying Jordan. 1.00

01:32:31.000 Well, here's the thing.

01:32:33.000 When people look for someone to be president, whether it's rational or not, they look towards someone who they think is going to be a leader.

01:32:41.000 Oh, the crying Jordan face? 0.70

01:32:43.000 Yeah, that's like the...

01:32:44.000 Oh.

01:32:44.000 They put it on everybody.

01:32:46.000 If you fuck up, you get the crying Jordan face. 1.00

01:32:49.000 People look towards someone that they want to be a leader, and the problem with Donald Trump He said a bunch of ridiculous stuff about, like, Mexicans and some stuff that, like, not measured stuff about Muslims coming into this country. 1.00

01:33:07.000 Not measured and rational and, you know, it was way too show-busy, you know? 1.00

01:33:16.000 If you fuck with the Mexicans, they will shut the country down. 1.00

01:33:21.000 Restaurants will be closed. 1.00

01:33:22.000 It'll be over.

01:33:24.000 Things will be done.

01:33:26.000 Yeah, very likely.

01:33:28.000 Plus, they're nice.

01:33:31.000 We're not having a lot of problems with Mexicans.

01:33:34.000 This idea that Mexicans are causing all these problems, if they were really causing that many problems, we would have a lot more problems, because there's a lot of Mexicans. 1.00

01:33:43.000 All they ever do, they just want to come over to the country so they can make money to send home to their family. 0.99

01:33:48.000 I worked with guys that literally slept in shithole rooms just so they could send their salary at $300, $400 from washing dishes all fucking week back home for their family. 0.90

01:34:00.000 And these are the people that you want to keep out of the country? 0.99

01:34:04.000 Like, the honest working man riding his bike back and forth to work every day in the fucking snow, the rain, whatever, you know? 0.98

01:34:14.000 It's upsetting. 0.97

01:34:15.000 I work close with these guys, you know what I mean?

01:34:17.000 Yeah, we're in kitchens, right?

01:34:18.000 In kitchens, yeah.

01:34:19.000 A lot of Mexican guys want to be in chefs.

01:34:22.000 And incredible ones, too.

01:34:24.000 And no, you could teach them any cuisine.

01:34:28.000 It's just unfortunate that...

01:34:32.000 He would say things like that and that people would respond the way they've responded.

01:34:37.000 You know, people got kind of excited that someone is finally going to close the wall, you know, close the borders and put up a wall.

01:34:45.000 They all come out when, you know, the freaks come out at night.

01:34:48.000 Well, it's just there's bad people in every group, in every group.

01:34:53.000 And the idea that...

01:34:55.000 These people, because they're more poor and because they got stuck in this one spot, they should be trapped there forever, even though it's connected to us by dirt.

01:35:08.000 I mean, there's like a clear path between us and Mexico. 0.93

01:35:11.000 It's right there.

01:35:11.000 And we have to stop people from walking across to get jobs.

01:35:15.000 Can you imagine if Americans, if you made them walk across the desert to get jobs?

01:35:20.000 Yeah, right.

01:35:22.000 How few of us would be employed if you had to walk across, you had to get in the river, you had to fucking wade across the river, you had to get to the other side holding your baby over the rapids.

01:35:33.000 And then once you get to the other side, you gotta climb a wall, and then you gotta walk across the desert, and then you gotta find a job.

01:35:39.000 Hmm.

01:35:39.000 What, you don't have a job for me when I get there?

01:35:41.000 No, no, no.

01:35:42.000 You better know somebody, too, because, you know, you can't speak their language.

01:35:46.000 What?

01:35:46.000 Yeah.

01:35:47.000 I'm gonna live somewhere where they don't speak my language. 1.00

01:35:50.000 Do you want money or not?

01:35:51.000 Okay, I'll do it.

01:35:52.000 No one's gonna do it.

01:35:53.000 No American do it. 1.00

01:35:55.000 You know? 1.00

01:35:55.000 These fucking kids coming out of college today. 1.00

01:35:57.000 There's no jobs. 1.00

01:35:59.000 This younger generation's fucked. 1.00

01:36:01.000 The wall just got ten feet higher. 1.00

01:36:03.000 Is this his new statement?

01:36:05.000 From a couple days ago, after he won something.

01:36:07.000 Oh my god.

01:36:09.000 He's hilarious.

01:36:10.000 It's hilarious.

01:36:14.000 So, the president of Mexico yesterday, or the ex-president, or whatever, whoever, who cares, He said, we will not even consider paying for the wall.

01:36:27.000 You have to understand.

01:36:28.000 Because, okay, you ready?

01:36:29.000 Who's gonna pay for the wall?

01:36:33.000 Who?

01:36:35.000 Oh my god.

01:36:38.000 A hundred percent.

01:36:40.000 A hundred percent.

01:36:41.000 So I get a call from one of the reporters yesterday, and they said, the president of Mexico said they will not, under any circumstances, pay for the wall.

01:36:52.000 They said to me, what is your comment?

01:36:55.000 I said, the wall just got ten feet higher.

01:36:58.000 It's true.

01:36:59.000 It's true. 0.98

01:37:02.000 He fucked it up with the, it's true, it's true. 0.98

01:37:05.000 He should have laid back on that. 0.99

01:37:06.000 He had a strong delivery.

01:37:08.000 He had a strong delivery.

01:37:09.000 He just panicked while he was getting the cheers.

01:37:12.000 He got hyped.

01:37:13.000 That's how you can tell he's not primed for the spot. 1.00

01:37:17.000 What the fuck is going on, man? 0.99

01:37:18.000 He got too hyped right there when he heard the claps. 1.00

01:37:20.000 That is crazy that a guy can say something like that.

01:37:23.000 That is so not measured.

01:37:24.000 Did you see that please clap moment with Jeb Bush?

01:37:28.000 No.

01:37:28.000 And it pretty much just like ruined him and he's now out of the race?

01:37:31.000 No.

01:37:32.000 What happened?

01:37:32.000 I'll show it to you.

01:37:33.000 He's given a speech somewhere and he gets this real riled up moment and he's waiting for an applause break and it doesn't come.

01:37:39.000 So he literally says to the crowd, please clap.

01:37:42.000 Oh my God. 1.00

01:37:44.000 Oh, the poor bastard. 1.00

01:37:45.000 Goodness gracious. 1.00

01:37:49.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:37:50.000 He's probably so happy to be out of this. 1.00

01:37:54.000 We'll have the back of the military.

01:37:55.000 I won't trash talk.

01:37:57.000 I won't be a divider in chief or an agitator in chief.

01:38:01.000 I won't be out there blowharding, talking a big game without backing it up.

01:38:05.000 I think the next president needs to be a lot quieter, but send a signal that we're prepared to act in the national security interests of this country to get back in the business of creating a more peaceful world.

01:38:17.000 Please clap.

01:38:20.000 I thought that was humorous.

01:38:24.000 I actually thought that was humorous.

01:38:25.000 That wasn't terrible.

01:38:26.000 I thought that was humorous.

01:38:28.000 The way he did that, I thought it was awkward.

01:38:32.000 I saw an older guy in a yarmulke.

01:38:34.000 I saw a bunch of really old people there.

01:38:37.000 Maybe they just didn't catch it at that time.

01:38:39.000 I thought he was being funny.

01:38:40.000 I would think that would be a good way to end it.

01:38:42.000 You say, please clap.

01:38:45.000 But maybe I'm just optimistic.

01:38:47.000 He's definitely not the guy.

01:38:50.000 You can't talk like that and be the guy. 1.00

01:38:52.000 You better be focused as fuck. 1.00

01:38:54.000 I think he probably saw what happened to his brother, saw what happened to his dad, and he was like, fuck this job. 1.00

01:38:59.000 Trying to be different. 0.99

01:39:01.000 No, I think they're trying to push him into a job he doesn't really want.

01:39:04.000 I don't think he really wanted to be president.

01:39:06.000 It just didn't seem like it to me.

01:39:08.000 He wants to be a carpenter.

01:39:10.000 Like, Bernie Sanders seems to want to be president.

01:39:13.000 I believe it.

01:39:14.000 I'm convinced Hillary Clinton wants to be president. 1.00

01:39:16.000 I'm convinced Trump wants to be president.

01:39:18.000 For sure.

01:39:19.000 How about that Rubio guy?

01:39:20.000 Does he want to be president?

01:39:22.000 No.

01:39:23.000 Chris Christie didn't want to be president.

01:39:25.000 No way. 0.99

01:39:26.000 No fucking way. 1.00

01:39:26.000 He's a fucking scumbag. 1.00

01:39:28.000 Is he? 1.00

01:39:29.000 How dare you?

01:39:31.000 Is he?

01:39:31.000 I'm not really sure.

01:39:33.000 This is what I hear.

01:39:36.000 I don't really know politics.

01:39:37.000 This is what I hear.

01:39:38.000 Yeah, that's all you need to know.

01:39:41.000 The judge has spoken.

01:39:45.000 Yeah, I just don't know.

01:39:46.000 I don't know what's gonna happen in this country if that guy wins.

01:39:49.000 It's gonna be very weird. 0.99

01:39:51.000 If that guy wins, like someone who could say shit like that wins? 1.00

01:39:54.000 Wow. 1.00

01:39:55.000 Who knows, man?

01:39:56.000 What would happen if he got into office and then immediately gave like a calm, sober presentation and explained that he did what he had to do to win, but he's absolutely serious about being the president.

01:40:09.000 I wonder if that's possible.

01:40:12.000 America's pretty liberal, I feel like.

01:40:13.000 Give him a shot. 0.79

01:40:15.000 Yeah, but the wall just got 10 foot higher.

01:40:17.000 Like, what?

01:40:18.000 What is this, an episode of a movie?

01:40:20.000 It's an episode of a movie. 1.00

01:40:22.000 He's a sick fuck. 1.00

01:40:24.000 That's what he is. 1.00

01:40:25.000 He's a sick fuck. 1.00

01:40:27.000 Do you think he's sick? 1.00

01:40:28.000 Mm-hmm.

01:40:29.000 Like how so? 1.00

01:40:31.000 100% he has one of the littlest dicks in the world. 0.99

01:40:34.000 There's no doubt about that. 0.99

01:40:35.000 I can't believe what I'm hearing on this program.

01:40:39.000 You can just tell how he's talking.

01:40:40.000 First of all, say allegedly. 1.00

01:40:43.000 Allegedly, he has one of the tiniest penis. 1.00

01:40:46.000 He has a micro penis. 1.00

01:40:48.000 I don't think that's the case. 1.00

01:40:49.000 I bet he's got a giant hog.

01:40:50.000 You think so?

01:40:51.000 I bet it's shocking.

01:40:52.000 That's why he's so confident.

01:40:53.000 I bet he pulls it out.

01:40:55.000 Well, he bought it then. 0.99

01:40:56.000 What the fuck are you showing me? 0.99

01:40:57.000 Then he bought it. 1.00

01:40:58.000 There's no doubt.

01:41:00.000 Realistic nude painting of Donald Trump will make you gouge your eyes out.

01:41:04.000 Okay.

01:41:05.000 I don't know what you're putting up there, Jamie.

01:41:07.000 It came up.

01:41:08.000 I thought that's where he got it from.

01:41:10.000 Nah, just by his actions, by the way you, you know, he definitely has micropenis syndrome. 0.98

01:41:18.000 I bet he's got a giant hog. 0.99

01:41:25.000 He's too cocky. 0.99

01:41:26.000 But that's the thing. 1.00

01:41:27.000 If he has one, he fucking bought it. 1.00

01:41:29.000 And it's one of those where you have to fucking pump your nut. 1.00

01:41:32.000 You know, you... 1.00

01:41:33.000 It's like a turkey baster. 1.00

01:41:36.000 You fucking pump your dick up. 1.00

01:41:40.000 All the Mexican actors got it from the soap operas. 1.00

01:41:44.000 All of them?

01:41:44.000 That's what I heard.

01:41:47.000 I was looking into this for when I get older.

01:41:50.000 That was what Liberace had.

01:41:52.000 The mechanical cock? 0.99

01:41:53.000 Yeah, he had a mechanical pump.

01:41:56.000 It's like the Reebok pump.

01:41:58.000 It was in the movie.

01:42:00.000 Did you ever see that movie, the HBO movie?

01:42:02.000 Who was he?

01:42:03.000 It was like with Zamo?

01:42:05.000 No, it was Michael Douglas and Matt Damon.

01:42:08.000 It was called something The Candle Opera Beyond The Candle Opera, is that what it was? 0.98

01:42:14.000 It was fucking amazing. 0.99

01:42:16.000 Really? 1.00

01:42:17.000 Liberace was a freak.

01:42:20.000 It was amazing.

01:42:21.000 It's so good.

01:42:22.000 First of all, Michael Douglas can act his ass off, man.

01:42:25.000 Yeah, he's a good... 0.84

01:42:26.000 Falling Down?

01:42:27.000 Yeah.

01:42:28.000 Oh, yeah.

01:42:28.000 One of my favorites.

01:42:29.000 But this one, for whatever reason, I think they made it for HBO. Or maybe they just sold it to HBO after they made it.

01:42:35.000 They might have financed it themselves.

01:42:36.000 I don't know what happened, but it was incredible.

01:42:40.000 Behind the Candelabra.

01:42:41.000 Oh, wow.

01:42:42.000 It's so good, man.

01:42:44.000 That looks incredible. 0.97

01:42:46.000 So fucking good. 1.00

01:42:48.000 And Matt Damon was his boyfriend, and it's just like, holy shit. 0.99

01:42:52.000 I'm gonna have to watch this for sure. 1.00

01:42:55.000 Dude, he was a freak. 0.99

01:43:00.000 It's fucking great. 1.00

01:43:02.000 He made his boyfriend get surgery to look more like him. 0.99

01:43:05.000 How about...

01:43:06.000 Wow. 0.99

01:43:07.000 His boyfriend was like this handsome guy, and he made his boyfriend fuck his chin up to be more like Liberace's chin. 0.98

01:43:15.000 How'd him get his chin done, dude? 1.00

01:43:17.000 That's fucking sick. 0.99

01:43:18.000 That's love. 1.00

01:43:19.000 Hit more.

01:43:20.000 No, no, I'm good.

01:43:22.000 Keep coughing.

01:43:26.000 You're in a constant state of marijuana.

01:43:29.000 I enjoy it.

01:43:31.000 Pretty much all day.

01:43:32.000 Yeah, for sure.

01:43:34.000 Do you take days off?

01:43:36.000 Yeah.

01:43:37.000 How many?

01:43:38.000 A year?

01:43:38.000 Not many.

01:43:39.000 Five a year?

01:43:40.000 No.

01:43:40.000 I can't really count.

01:43:42.000 I don't know.

01:43:42.000 Less?

01:43:43.000 Yes.

01:43:44.000 One a year?

01:43:44.000 Maybe.

01:43:49.000 Not really sure.

01:43:51.000 I think this year I took off, I think maybe two days because I had surgery.

01:43:55.000 But then I was right back at it.

01:43:58.000 Well, I would think that it'd probably be good for reducing inflammation, calming you down after surgery.

01:44:02.000 Yeah, but the coughing is no good when it was stomach, you know?

01:44:04.000 So the coughing is...

01:44:06.000 Oh, this is when you had hernia?

01:44:07.000 Yeah.

01:44:09.000 That's a super common injury, man. 1.00

01:44:12.000 This shit happened in Alaska, too. 1.00

01:44:14.000 Ooh. 1.00

01:44:15.000 Yeah, it was crazy.

01:44:16.000 I was in Alaska doing a performance and... 0.69

01:44:19.000 I was playing NBA Jam against my boy and he was the Super Sonics and he just fucking dunked on me and I got upset and I felt something in my stomach and from there... 0.89

01:44:29.000 NBA Jam the video game? 0.81

01:44:30.000 Yeah, tournament edition.

01:44:32.000 You got a hernia playing NBA Jam the video game? 1.00

01:44:34.000 Can you believe that? 1.00

01:44:36.000 How fucking crazy. 0.99

01:44:37.000 You want to talk about ironic? 1.00

01:44:39.000 That's hilarious.

01:44:40.000 I was the Knicks, he was the Sonics.

01:44:43.000 I wasn't happy.

01:44:45.000 That's hilarious.

01:44:46.000 Wow.

01:44:49.000 I might be the only one to ever get a hernia from playing a video game.

01:44:54.000 I doubt it.

01:44:55.000 No?

01:44:55.000 Nah.

01:44:56.000 Nah, I bet people have died.

01:44:58.000 Playing a video game?

01:44:59.000 Yeah, I bet they've contorted themselves, slipped, broken their head open on a coffee table and died.

01:45:03.000 Oh yeah, for sure.

01:45:04.000 Yeah, people have died playing video games.

01:45:06.000 Millions ways of dying.

01:45:08.000 Yeah.

01:45:08.000 Yeah, getting a hernia because you're freaking out.

01:45:10.000 That's a slight injury in comparison to, I'm sure, some of the shit that people try to avoid things. 0.98

01:45:16.000 They fall and fall out a window and fall 16 stories to their death. 0.99

01:45:20.000 You're right. 1.00

01:45:21.000 I guarantee you shit has happened. 0.99

01:45:22.000 You're right. 1.00

01:45:23.000 I've heard about these things.

01:45:24.000 Yeah. 0.99

01:45:24.000 People are ridiculous. 0.99

01:45:26.000 Shit, man. 1.00

01:45:28.000 I'm gonna stay away from fucking Windows, man. 1.00

01:45:30.000 Yeah, don't go near Windows while you're playing video games. 0.99

01:45:34.000 Don't blow out your hernia.

01:45:36.000 No, defs, please. 1.00

01:45:37.000 If you haven't had a hernia surgery and you're like, oh man, fuck, I don't want to get it operated on, man. 0.99

01:45:42.000 I'm scared it'll take me out. 0.99

01:45:43.000 How much does it take you out?

01:45:44.000 Takes you out for a couple of months.

01:45:46.000 Does it?

01:45:47.000 Yeah.

01:45:47.000 I mean, you'll never feel, I don't know, I guess, it's not like I could go back and start power lifting right now.

01:45:54.000 It's just not going to happen.

01:45:55.000 How long has it been since surgery?

01:45:57.000 I had it in November.

01:45:59.000 So a few months.

01:46:00.000 Yeah, I feel good.

01:46:01.000 Like, now I feel good.

01:46:02.000 So now you're at the point where it feels normal?

01:46:05.000 Yeah.

01:46:05.000 That's good.

01:46:06.000 I feel normal now.

01:46:07.000 So you would recommend it to someone that also has had a hernia, if they have a hernia?

01:46:11.000 Yeah, just chill out.

01:46:13.000 Get that surgery?

01:46:14.000 Yeah, absolutely.

01:46:14.000 If you have the umbilical one in the stomach.

01:46:18.000 Yeah, you hear that, Doug Stanhope? 1.00

01:46:20.000 Get yourself stitched up, bitch. 1.00

01:46:23.000 You know, you're always fucking walking around pushing your stomach in, and it's fucking, it's not cute. 1.00

01:46:28.000 Especially if you have the other one, fucking, your intestines go into your nutsack. 1.00

01:46:31.000 It looks like you got elephantitis. 1.00

01:46:34.000 Yeah, my friend Eddie had it, and he used to have to push down on his abdomen when he would talk, like he was talking loud.

01:46:39.000 Because he'd pop out.

01:46:40.000 Yeah.

01:46:40.000 It's one of the worst things ever.

01:46:43.000 Yeah, if you're in a loud place, a jackhammer's going off, he would literally have to push his hand into his abdomen to keep it compressed and go, dude, let's get the fuck out of here.

01:46:54.000 I performed for two or three years already with that... 0.95

01:46:59.000 Popping out.

01:46:59.000 Oh my god.

01:47:01.000 I don't know how to fuck it. 1.00

01:47:02.000 Oh, so you waited a long time before you got it fixed. 1.00

01:47:05.000 Nah, I got it fixed and then it broke one time.

01:47:07.000 Oh. 0.99

01:47:08.000 Now to get it done again, they put a fucking... 0.99

01:47:10.000 Alright, so say the cut is about... 0.99

01:47:12.000 I mean, the hole in your stomach is about an inch or whatever.

01:47:15.000 They put an inch of mesh over it. 0.99

01:47:19.000 It's obviously going to fucking burst again. 0.90

01:47:22.000 You have to cover it with a little bit bigger piece. 0.98

01:47:25.000 So that's what the Alaskan doctor did. 0.99

01:47:28.000 Oh, so you had a shitty doctor. 1.00

01:47:29.000 I had a shitty doctor from Queens. 1.00

01:47:31.000 I tell this story all the time. 1.00

01:47:33.000 I'm in the fucking waiting room. 1.00

01:47:35.000 First, I shit myself because I don't know what they gave me. 1.00

01:47:38.000 Second of all, I made them clean me. 0.99

01:47:41.000 Third of all, I'm on the operating room about to get put under... 1.00

01:47:46.000 Fucking guy goes to the doctor. 1.00

01:47:48.000 Yo, you know who that is? 1.00

01:47:50.000 My dick is so shriveled because I'm scared. 0.99

01:47:52.000 I'm scared that I'm holding the blanket above my stomach. 1.00

01:47:57.000 Obviously, I'm going to get knocked out. 1.00

01:47:58.000 So I'm like, ah, fuck. 1.00

01:47:59.000 I thought that they were going to take pictures of my shriveled dick. 1.00

01:48:03.000 That was the last thought I had before going under surgery. 0.99

01:48:06.000 Think about that.

01:48:08.000 How rude.

01:48:08.000 Blew my mind.

01:48:09.000 How rude would that be?

01:48:12.000 Yeah.

01:48:13.000 Well, you got to, you know...

01:48:16.000 People could definitely do that.

01:48:17.000 I'm saying...

01:48:18.000 If they were terrible people.

01:48:20.000 Whatever.

01:48:21.000 If they did that, would I have grounds to sue?

01:48:25.000 Yeah, definitely.

01:48:26.000 For defamation of character?

01:48:28.000 Definitely.

01:48:28.000 Because I wasn't at my finest.

01:48:30.000 No, poor representation of your penis. 1.00

01:48:31.000 Poor, exactly. 1.00

01:48:32.000 It was terrible.

01:48:34.000 Well, I know that people have... 0.99

01:48:35.000 There's definitely been people that have gotten in trouble for doing terrible shit to, like, dentists doing terrible shit to their patients when they're under... 0.99

01:48:43.000 I heard about that from the Jerky Boys years ago. 1.00

01:48:47.000 He knocked me out!

01:48:49.000 He pulled my pants down and my mouth all bloody! 1.00

01:48:55.000 I love that shit. 1.00

01:48:57.000 The Jerky Boys, people forgot. 1.00

01:48:59.000 That shaped my life. 0.99

01:49:01.000 They forgot how funny some of those fucking recordings were. 0.99

01:49:04.000 Frank Frizzo. 1.00

01:49:06.000 Sizzle chest. 0.98

01:49:08.000 Those were funny, man.

01:49:10.000 These young kids, if you've never heard of the Jerky Boys, go and listen.

01:49:14.000 They would call people up and pretend that things were going on.

01:49:18.000 Greg Fitzsimmons did some of those.

01:49:19.000 He did some of his own.

01:49:21.000 And he did one of them where he called this rental car company with this heavy Boston accent and was telling them the car they rented was on fire.

01:49:28.000 And he's got this, the car's on fire! 0.99

01:49:31.000 It's fucking Sully! 1.00

01:49:32.000 We went to the fucking gas station! 1.00

01:49:35.000 This asshole didn't bring the fucking gas tank! 1.00

01:49:39.000 So we had pots and pans filled with gasoline in the car. 1.00

01:49:43.000 People are going, what?

01:49:44.000 You had pots and pans filled with gas in the car?

01:49:47.000 Listen, the car's on fire.

01:49:50.000 You gotta get over here.

01:49:53.000 Yeah, prank calls were always good.

01:49:55.000 Chinese restaurants, whatever you could call.

01:49:57.000 Do you remember Jimmy Kimmel had a television show?

01:50:01.000 Crank Yankers? 0.83

01:50:02.000 Oh yeah.

01:50:03.000 Remember that?

01:50:03.000 Yep.

01:50:04.000 And it was all prank calls done with like sock puppets.

01:50:07.000 I remember it. 0.99

01:50:08.000 It was funny as fuck. 1.00

01:50:09.000 Fuck yeah, it was funny. 1.00

01:50:12.000 You used to be able to do stuff like that in Vegas. 1.00

01:50:15.000 Nevada had a different rule. 0.93

01:50:17.000 You could use people's calls for something like that.

01:50:21.000 Whereas in California, you'd have to tell them, hey, I'm going to use this.

01:50:25.000 I'm going to record this call.

01:50:27.000 And then everything after that, you could use.

01:50:29.000 Anything before you said that, you couldn't use.

01:50:31.000 It would be inadmissible.

01:50:32.000 Inadmissible.

01:50:33.000 Excuse me, inadmissible.

01:50:34.000 Yeah, inadmissible.

01:50:36.000 Yeah. 0.95

01:50:38.000 I mean, I know there's a lot, you know, I've been caught out there, like, baby mother trying to start drama with me over the phone, have me on three-way, and I say some crazy shit, and then, 0.99

01:50:54.000 like, six of her fucking family members hear it, you know what I mean? 0.99

01:50:57.000 Oh, boy. 1.00

01:50:58.000 That should be inadmissible in life. 1.00

01:51:02.000 So you want the freedom to say crazy shit? 0.99

01:51:05.000 I mean, at the end of the day, like, if you provoke me... 1.00

01:51:09.000 It's funny because there's two ways of looking at it, right? 1.00

01:51:12.000 It's like you want the freedom to say crazy shit. 1.00

01:51:14.000 She wants everybody to know how fucking crazy you really are. 1.00

01:51:17.000 That's true. 1.00

01:51:18.000 So she wants to have people listen. 1.00

01:51:20.000 You know how crazy this motherfucker is? 1.00

01:51:21.000 I'm sick. 1.00

01:51:22.000 Here it is.

01:51:23.000 Watch.

01:51:23.000 You're screaming and yelling.

01:51:25.000 And she's like, see, I told you.

01:51:31.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:51:32.000 I'm an asshole. 1.00

01:51:33.000 Well, pretty much. 1.00

01:51:34.000 I'm a fucking asshole. 1.00

01:51:35.000 Do you want to change? 1.00

01:51:37.000 Do you want a come to Jesus moment?

01:51:39.000 Uh, no.

01:51:40.000 No?

01:51:40.000 You're happy with who you are?

01:51:41.000 I'm ecstatic. 1.00

01:51:43.000 You don't seem like an asshole right now. 0.99

01:51:45.000 You seem very friendly. 0.98

01:51:46.000 Thank you, man.

01:51:47.000 I appreciate that.

01:51:48.000 We're high.

01:51:49.000 That helps.

01:51:50.000 But I wasn't when we came here and we started playing pool.

01:51:53.000 You seem like a very nice guy.

01:51:54.000 I was alright.

01:51:55.000 You're a nice guy.

01:51:56.000 Yeah, I'm decent.

01:51:57.000 I'm alright.

01:51:58.000 Once you get to know me, you won't like me anymore.

01:52:01.000 No.

01:52:02.000 Really?

01:52:03.000 Nah.

01:52:03.000 I'm a good guy.

01:52:04.000 No, I think you're a good guy.

01:52:05.000 I am.

01:52:06.000 How high are you right now?

01:52:07.000 I'm not that high.

01:52:08.000 All the way?

01:52:08.000 Nah, you know I'm high, but I'm normal.

01:52:12.000 I'm level.

01:52:12.000 I feel like we're getting trapped with the first few words of the sentences we're saying, and then we're committed to these sentences, and we don't know exactly what we were going to say when we started talking, so we're making it up as we go along.

01:52:25.000 That high.

01:52:26.000 That's how high we are right now. 1.00

01:52:27.000 Shit. 1.00

01:52:28.000 It's all this about good guy, bad guy shit. 1.00

01:52:30.000 You don't even know what you're talking about. 1.00

01:52:31.000 Neither do I. I have no clue.

01:52:33.000 I have no idea what's going on.

01:52:36.000 So don't commit us to any of these quotes, ladies and gentlemen.

01:52:39.000 That's my point.

01:52:40.000 Leave Action alone.

01:52:42.000 He's not a bad guy.

01:52:43.000 I'm a great guy.

01:52:45.000 Good pool player too, man.

01:52:46.000 You know how to play some pool.

01:52:47.000 I'm alright.

01:52:48.000 You got a good grip on the cue.

01:52:49.000 I'm decent.

01:52:50.000 I used to be better.

01:52:52.000 I could tell.

01:52:53.000 Yeah.

01:52:54.000 You definitely have a more than casual understanding of how to play.

01:52:57.000 For sure.

01:52:58.000 I was taught.

01:52:59.000 I was taught.

01:53:01.000 I spent some time in pool halls in Queens, you know?

01:53:04.000 Stood on the wall.

01:53:05.000 Those places are important.

01:53:07.000 For sure.

01:53:08.000 They're dying out.

01:53:09.000 Star billiard. 1.00

01:53:11.000 Fucking millennium billiards on Frannie Lou Boulevard with the Asians, with the fucking polo shirt, with the collar popped. 1.00

01:53:19.000 Asians with the collar popped. 1.00

01:53:21.000 Straight up.

01:53:21.000 Light blue.

01:53:22.000 Light blue motherfuckers having drag races on the strip in the Mustangs. 0.99

01:53:26.000 Yes. 1.00

01:53:29.000 Civics?

01:53:30.000 Acuras?

01:53:30.000 At Chelsea Billiards in New York, there was always a lot of really strong Asian players that gambled a lot.

01:53:38.000 Oh, for sure. 1.00

01:53:39.000 And they would go in there talking mad shit. 0.99

01:53:41.000 There was a bunch of these dudes who were really colorful guys in the pool community that were these Asian cats. 1.00

01:53:46.000 Koreans. 0.64

01:53:47.000 One guy was Chinese. 0.88

01:53:49.000 This one Korean dude, though, gambled like crazy. 1.00

01:53:52.000 And he'd come in talking mad shit. 1.00

01:53:54.000 And he was just like that. 1.00

01:53:55.000 Polo shirt on.

01:53:56.000 Looking preppy.

01:53:57.000 Going right into the heart of the jungle in the pool culture, which was Chelsea Billiards. 1.00

01:54:01.000 Yep.

01:54:02.000 It's crazy, man.

01:54:04.000 It's a funny culture.

01:54:06.000 I don't know.

01:54:07.000 Asians in general, I feel like they're good at precision games.

01:54:12.000 Definitely good at pool.

01:54:14.000 Some of the best players in the world are Asian.

01:54:16.000 That girl, the Black Widow?

01:54:18.000 Yep.

01:54:19.000 She's incredible.

01:54:20.000 There's a bunch of guys.

01:54:22.000 Colby Min.

01:54:25.000 I think he's from Taiwan.

01:54:26.000 A bunch of guys from Taiwan that are really good.

01:54:29.000 A lot of Asians, especially Filipinos.

01:54:32.000 Filipinos, that's pretty much the number one country, other than the United States, of the greatest pool players ever.

01:54:38.000 Really? 0.99

01:54:39.000 Yeah, for one spot, it's tough to fuck with the Philippines. 1.00

01:54:42.000 They have some of the all-time greatest. 0.99

01:54:45.000 It's a bunch of islands.

01:54:46.000 I think it's like a thousand islands, right?

01:54:48.000 Yeah.

01:54:48.000 Isn't it crazy?

01:54:49.000 But a gang of them come from the Philippines.

01:54:53.000 The US GIs apparently dropped pool off over there when they were in World War II. They brought pool tables over to entertain the GIs.

01:55:06.000 And that's apparently how Filipinos got involved in pool.

01:55:10.000 That's allegedly the story.

01:55:12.000 The pool community says. 0.97

01:55:15.000 Well, in Vietnam, it seems like the G.I.s brought funk music to fucking Vietnam and Thailand and all those, like wherever they were. 0.99

01:55:26.000 Because there's some funky motherfucking music that comes from the 70s and in the Vietnamese, like this Vietnamese soul music that just sounds like Motherfuckers from Harlem are playing, you know? 0.99

01:55:40.000 Wow. 0.99

01:55:40.000 Incredible stuff. 0.99

01:55:42.000 Wow.

01:55:42.000 And it's in their language?

01:55:44.000 Mm-hmm.

01:55:44.000 Which is even crazier because it sounds amazing.

01:55:48.000 What is that?

01:55:48.000 Give me a name or something.

01:55:50.000 Just look up Vietnamese or Thai pop or Vietnamese funk.

01:55:54.000 There's this one specific album.

01:55:58.000 I think it's called Saigon Rock.

01:56:03.000 It's pretty next level.

01:56:04.000 There's a picture of a woman on it. 0.75

01:56:06.000 On the cover.

01:56:09.000 I'm gonna find that.

01:56:11.000 I love it.

01:56:12.000 There it is.

01:56:13.000 Bam, Jamie.

01:56:14.000 On the ball.

01:56:15.000 Saigon Rock.

01:56:16.000 Yeah, man.

01:56:17.000 Hit me with some of this.

01:56:18.000 Hit me with some of this.

01:56:21.000 Oh my god.

01:56:24.000 1968 to 1974. You know what I mean?

01:56:28.000 Holy shit. 1.00

01:56:46.000 Wow. 1.00

01:56:47.000 Whoa.

01:56:51.000 You know what I'm saying?

01:56:54.000 Wow. 1.00

01:56:57.000 That shit sounds crazy. 1.00

01:57:00.000 Wow. 1.00

01:57:05.000 I was listening to this...

01:57:07.000 I don't speak Spanish. 0.99

01:57:09.000 Obviously, I don't speak Vietnamese either, so when I'm listening to that, it gives you a little extra kind of cool charge to it, because you don't even know what the fuck they're saying. 0.99

01:57:20.000 And you're trying to mimic it. 0.98

01:57:22.000 Just making noises that sound like it.

01:57:25.000 What is Joey Diaz's band, Jamie?

01:57:27.000 Joey Diaz's nephew's band?

01:57:29.000 Or his cousin's band?

01:57:32.000 I've got them on my music here somewhere.

01:57:36.000 I'm trying to find it, though.

01:57:41.000 They're a band out of Cuba.

01:57:44.000 Joey's family's out of Cuba.

01:57:46.000 X Alfonso?

01:57:47.000 M.A. Alfonso?

01:57:48.000 I think it's X, though, no?

01:57:51.000 Buena Vista Social Club?

01:57:53.000 No, that's one of them.

01:57:55.000 But the band that they're in is X Alfonso.

01:58:00.000 This is from his Twitter.

01:58:01.000 That's where I got that from.

01:58:02.000 Oh, that's his cousin.

01:58:03.000 Yeah.

01:58:04.000 The band...

01:58:05.000 This I haven't seen, but there's a band that I was listening to.

01:58:08.000 It's called X Alfonso. 0.96

01:58:10.000 They are fucking badass, dude. 0.99

01:58:13.000 Oh my god. 0.99

01:58:15.000 They're bad, and I don't know what they're saying.

01:58:17.000 It's really cool because when you're listening to it, these are...

01:58:21.000 So I guess Joey's cousin's Emmy.

01:58:23.000 Is that it?

01:58:24.000 In the bottom here, he comments, and he says, All I know is X Alfonso.

01:58:28.000 Thank you.

01:58:29.000 Oh, okay.

01:58:34.000 Someone asked him what the name of his cousin's rock band was.

01:58:36.000 He said, all I know is X Alfonso.

01:58:38.000 This was a couple years ago, too.

01:58:39.000 Okay.

01:58:42.000 So I guess that's his cousin.

01:58:43.000 But whatever, man. 0.99

01:58:45.000 They're fucking badass. 0.99

01:58:47.000 They're cool, too, because I like listening to stuff like this when I write, because I don't know what the fuck they're saying. 0.99

01:58:53.000 It's just cool. 0.91

01:58:55.000 I don't have to follow their narrative.

01:58:57.000 I can just enjoy it.

01:58:59.000 I can just enjoy the sound of it.

01:59:01.000 Absolutely.

01:59:02.000 I agree.

01:59:15.000 It's your soul in soledad.

01:59:18.000 This is more of a traditional song. 1.00

01:59:21.000 They have some crazy wild rock and roll shit. 0.99

01:59:24.000 See if you can find... 0.99

01:59:25.000 I don't want to give people the wrong impression on what kind of music they have. 0.99

01:59:29.000 I fucking speak Spanish. 0.98

01:59:31.000 I understand what they sing. 1.00

01:59:34.000 See if you can find Reverse.

01:59:40.000 This is a really cool video too.

01:59:42.000 The video is really amazingly shot.

01:59:47.000 Bright graphics.

01:59:58.000 So what they're doing is they're playing this song forward and backward.

02:00:06.000 Did you fast forward it to like deep into the song? 0.99

02:00:12.000 Yeah, interesting shit. 0.98

02:00:14.000 So this is Joey Diaz's cousins. 1.00

02:00:16.000 So I guess there's fucking talent in them jeans. 0.99

02:00:21.000 Have you been to Cuba yet? 0.99

02:00:23.000 Nope.

02:00:23.000 Are you going to go?

02:00:24.000 I would like to.

02:00:25.000 I want to go there before it becomes a tourist trap.

02:00:28.000 Yeah, as soon as 4G LTE gets there, it's over.

02:00:31.000 Ah, it's over.

02:00:32.000 I don't want to be able to use my phone.

02:00:34.000 Well, you can use it now in some spots, apparently.

02:00:38.000 Apparently there's like some spots where you can go where you could use your phone. 0.99

02:00:43.000 It's fucking whack. 0.98

02:00:44.000 It's weird. 0.98

02:00:45.000 But I want them to have phones.

02:00:46.000 I'm torn.

02:00:48.000 I think they should be able to have phones.

02:00:50.000 And the other way our phones won't work is if their phones don't work.

02:00:54.000 That's true.

02:00:55.000 Yeah, they should have phones, for sure.

02:00:58.000 Now that you bring it to my attention in that manner, they should definitely have phones.

02:01:03.000 But there seem to be...

02:01:04.000 They put together a pretty amazing culture without it. 1.00

02:01:08.000 Shit. 1.00

02:01:09.000 It's legendary. 1.00

02:01:10.000 It's classic.

02:01:11.000 Look at the...

02:01:12.000 The architecture and all those colors and old cars.

02:01:18.000 Yeah, the old cars.

02:01:19.000 Just the music.

02:01:20.000 If you watch that Buena Vista Social Club stuff and that documentary, it's really mind-blowing.

02:01:26.000 It's actually very beautiful.

02:01:28.000 The music that they make is unreal.

02:01:30.000 It's like...

02:01:32.000 Unbelievable.

02:01:33.000 The way it's shot is magical.

02:01:35.000 Yeah, they definitely have a sound and a style of their own.

02:01:39.000 And to think that all that was taking place over the last 50 or so years...

02:01:45.000 Just 90 miles away from us.

02:01:47.000 We had no idea.

02:01:48.000 And on top of that, we weren't even allowed to visit.

02:01:51.000 For 50 years, we were kept from going to a spot.

02:01:55.000 And with no reason that makes any sense.

02:01:58.000 We were kept from going.

02:01:59.000 You could get in trouble, man. 0.99

02:02:01.000 Like in the 1980s, if you travel to Cuba, you could get in fucking trouble. 0.99

02:02:05.000 The big daddy government told you where you could visit. 0.99

02:02:08.000 Think about that.

02:02:10.000 You could go to Africa.

02:02:11.000 You could go to the Congo.

02:02:12.000 They wouldn't give you a hard time.

02:02:14.000 But if you go to Cuba, they could lock you up.

02:02:17.000 Just for visiting.

02:02:19.000 I want to see what it's like over there.

02:02:20.000 I want to see some people.

02:02:21.000 Not allowed. 0.97

02:02:23.000 That's the most ridiculous thing ever. 0.99

02:02:25.000 It's sick. 1.00

02:02:26.000 There's no reason.

02:02:28.000 It's not for your own safety, because there's some super dangerous spots you could go visit right now.

02:02:33.000 No one's going to stop you from flying to Iraq. 0.97

02:02:36.000 Nicaragua.

02:02:37.000 No one's going to stop you from flying to a lot of places in this world that are in a terrible state.

02:02:46.000 Of civil unrest.

02:02:47.000 You can just go.

02:02:48.000 You can go.

02:02:49.000 Or Cuba, no.

02:02:50.000 Yeah, can't go to Cuba.

02:02:51.000 But we can now.

02:02:53.000 It was Russia's fault. 1.00

02:02:55.000 Fucking Russia. 1.00

02:02:56.000 I like Russia. 1.00

02:02:58.000 I was there last year.

02:02:59.000 They went hard at us.

02:03:00.000 They gave it a shot.

02:03:02.000 It was really gray, to tell you the truth.

02:03:05.000 Yeah? 0.99

02:03:06.000 It was a fucking very gray place, but... 0.99

02:03:08.000 Gray like the weather you mean? 1.00

02:03:10.000 Like the color.

02:03:12.000 The weather, like the way it looked outside?

02:03:14.000 Yeah, like not nice.

02:03:15.000 Like no sunshine?

02:03:18.000 Nah.

02:03:19.000 It was sunny out and it was definitely not sunshine.

02:03:22.000 Oh really?

02:03:22.000 It was a hard place.

02:03:24.000 You could tell there was hard times. 1.00

02:03:27.000 They braided some hard fucking people. 1.00

02:03:29.000 Some fucking jaws, man. 1.00

02:03:31.000 Their jaws are fucking defined. 1.00

02:03:33.000 Some of the scariest MMA fighters ever. 0.99

02:03:36.000 Fedor.

02:03:37.000 Yep.

02:03:38.000 And out of Dagestan. 0.75

02:03:40.000 Dagestan's another place where just developing these killers.

02:03:44.000 This kid, he's fighting the UFC. Kid, man.

02:03:47.000 Man, gentleman.

02:03:49.000 Habib Nurmagomedov. 0.98

02:03:50.000 He's an animal. 1.00

02:03:51.000 Monster. 1.00

02:03:52.000 Animal. 0.95

02:03:53.000 Ridiculously good grappler. 0.94

02:03:55.000 Just destroyer. 0.99

02:03:56.000 So fucking, so good. 1.00

02:03:58.000 Think about it. 1.00

02:03:59.000 They're all fucking old men over there just fucking wrestling all day long in the barn. 1.00

02:04:03.000 In the fucking wet and the cold. 0.99

02:04:11.000 So, all told with this show, do you have a deal to do it for a certain amount of time, or are you just doing it for as long as you enjoy it? 0.99

02:04:20.000 Right now, it feels like it could be going on for a long time if it hits.

02:04:24.000 I feel like it's gonna.

02:04:27.000 People are gonna enjoy it.

02:04:28.000 It's entertainment, you know? 1.00

02:04:29.000 It's entertaining shit. 1.00

02:04:31.000 It's a different view. 0.99

02:04:32.000 If it's nearly as good as your Instagram page with the photos of it...

02:04:36.000 It's pretty good.

02:04:38.000 That's light.

02:04:38.000 The Instagram page is light work.

02:04:40.000 What was this steak that you ate that you had on your Instagram that, like, aged for seven months?

02:04:45.000 That was at my man Mario Batali's Steakhouse in Vegas where you need to go because you're there a lot.

02:04:51.000 Seven months?

02:04:51.000 Seven months.

02:04:53.000 Right in the Venetian.

02:04:54.000 That's insane.

02:04:55.000 Carne vino.

02:04:56.000 How do you do that?

02:04:57.000 How do you age something for seven months?

02:04:59.000 You just leave it there. 1.00

02:05:00.000 You just leave that shit there and it becomes blue. 1.00

02:05:03.000 Oh, look at that. 1.00

02:05:06.000 That was a good picture.

02:05:08.000 Chris Grosso, my producer, took that picture, man. 1.00

02:05:11.000 Oh, shit. 0.99

02:05:12.000 So that's ribeye that was 70-day aged. 1.00

02:05:16.000 And, like, what's the temperature when they age?

02:05:18.000 No, that's seven months.

02:05:20.000 Excuse me.

02:05:20.000 Seven months, not 70 days.

02:05:22.000 That's a premature child.

02:05:24.000 I don't want to believe it.

02:05:25.000 I don't want to believe it.

02:05:26.000 Seven months?

02:05:28.000 What's the temperature they put it at? 0.99

02:05:30.000 They fucking grill it very, very hot. 0.99

02:05:32.000 No, I mean to keep it to age it. 1.00

02:05:34.000 Oh, the aging.

02:05:35.000 I think that it was...

02:05:36.000 They wouldn't tell you exactly, but I would imagine it's in between...

02:05:40.000 In the 40s.

02:05:42.000 Really?

02:05:43.000 30 to 40. How does it not turn into just rot?

02:05:46.000 Because there's so much fat cap on it that the fat protects it and the meat just rots inside and...

02:05:56.000 All that fatty tissue breaks down and just becomes nutty and unbelievably fucking delicious, you know, and deep and incredible depth of flavor and developing all this earthiness and this umami flavor you can't really explain. 0.94

02:06:14.000 But when you eat it, it just melts and it's like what the fuck is going on? 0.98

02:06:19.000 Whoa. 0.99

02:06:19.000 Yeah. 0.99

02:06:21.000 Seven months of rot to me.

02:06:24.000 It's like that if that wasn't real and we found out that the Romans used to do that. 0.91

02:06:28.000 Oh they did.

02:06:29.000 We would be like, of course.

02:06:29.000 But not with refrigeration.

02:06:31.000 If we just found out that they used to do it, we'd be like, what in the fuck are these assholes doing? 1.00

02:06:35.000 Right. 1.00

02:06:36.000 They would let the meat rot away for seven months so that they could slice a sliver off the inside.

02:06:42.000 And present it.

02:06:43.000 And present that.

02:06:44.000 I mean how much meat goes to waste?

02:06:45.000 A lot.

02:06:46.000 There's a lot of waste in that.

02:06:47.000 Like what percentage you think?

02:06:50.000 Maybe 30 to 40 percent of the product because the bone is huge and then the meat is just, the meat is like this.

02:06:57.000 That's how much, it's about five inches long and paws and three inches wide.

02:07:05.000 Out of the whole cow?

02:07:06.000 You know, that's the ribeye. 0.74

02:07:09.000 That's that rib. 0.99

02:07:10.000 It has the big ass bone. 1.00

02:07:12.000 It has that thick ass fat they have to cut off. 0.99

02:07:15.000 So they must lose a substantial amount of meat. 1.00

02:07:18.000 Oh, that shit is like a fucking... 1.00

02:07:19.000 It's $200 an inch. 1.00

02:07:21.000 Wow.

02:07:22.000 So that's like the worst eco-friendly meat.

02:07:27.000 Ever.

02:07:28.000 But it's sublime.

02:07:30.000 Oh my god.

02:07:31.000 Sublime tasting.

02:07:32.000 It's like...

02:07:34.000 It's bizarre how far people will go out of their way to try to, like, rig the perfect steak to something like this, where you're letting some meat sit for seven months.

02:07:43.000 That means they had to take it up to, like, a year, and then they go, like, back off. 1.00

02:07:46.000 We can't eat this shit. 0.99

02:07:47.000 No, there's 12 months. 1.00

02:07:50.000 No, there's not!

02:07:50.000 There is 12 months, man.

02:07:51.000 No!

02:07:52.000 How big is it?

02:07:53.000 They serve it to you.

02:07:54.000 It's like a fingernail.

02:07:55.000 Yeah, it's about the same thing.

02:07:57.000 It's a little bit smaller than that, but... 0.99

02:07:59.000 It's the last remaining cells that haven't turned to total shit. 0.99

02:08:02.000 Exactly. 0.99

02:08:03.000 Bacteria. 1.00

02:08:04.000 The fucking new AIDS runs rampant through your cooler. 1.00

02:08:07.000 And that is the most delicious bite of food on the planet, apparently. 1.00

02:08:12.000 Oh, God. 1.00

02:08:13.000 According to these motherfuckers, and I just had that, the seven month is mmm, ooh, ah, like you can't believe. 0.99

02:08:20.000 And so there's a big difference between the seven month and five months later? 1.00

02:08:24.000 100%. 0.98

02:08:24.000 Are you fucking kidding me? 0.98

02:08:29.000 How much better is the one that's a year? 0.99

02:08:32.000 You need to try it.

02:08:33.000 I haven't tried that one yet, but I feel that it's going to be very, you can't have too much.

02:08:37.000 Is it the size of like a flip phone?

02:08:39.000 Intense.

02:08:42.000 That's a good piece.

02:08:44.000 The smaller one.

02:08:45.000 Oh, a smaller iPhone?

02:08:46.000 But like I said, they're gonna give you like a quarter inch or a half inch piece because it's too OD. It's like eating a whole thing of blue cheese in one bite.

02:08:56.000 Oh, as far as like the amount of bacteria?

02:08:58.000 No, no, I'm saying like the taste.

02:09:00.000 Yes, I do.

02:09:00.000 I love blue cheese.

02:09:01.000 It almost tastes like you're eating silver.

02:09:03.000 Oh, yeah.

02:09:04.000 You know what I mean? 0.99

02:09:05.000 That's because it's fucking fungus. 0.99

02:09:07.000 Exactly. 1.00

02:09:07.000 That's incredible. 1.00

02:09:08.000 I love that shit. 1.00

02:09:10.000 I love funky shit. 1.00

02:09:13.000 Cheese. 1.00

02:09:14.000 We were in Paris eating two-year-old, three-year-old, eight-year-old cheeses. 0.99

02:09:20.000 Cheese that's been buried in shit, hay, all kinds of craziness. 0.99

02:09:25.000 Yeah, the Paris folk have really figured out a way to make that stuff stink. 1.00

02:09:30.000 It stinks.

02:09:31.000 They love that stuff.

02:09:34.000 That was one of the main ingredients we used to use on Fear Factor to make things smell worse.

02:09:39.000 Cheese?

02:09:40.000 Expensive cheese.

02:09:41.000 Really?

02:09:41.000 Yeah, they would go to a place in Beverly Hills where they have a...

02:09:50.000 Just a giant selection of the grossest, rankest, fucking funkiest cheeses where you open the cart and you're like, jeez, what the fuck? 0.99

02:10:00.000 And it's super expensive. 0.99

02:10:02.000 And that stuff, I don't remember what it was called, they would throw that stuff into blenders to make bugs smell worse.

02:10:07.000 Mmm. 0.99

02:10:09.000 No wonder they fucking threw up all the time. 1.00

02:10:12.000 I was like, ugh! 0.99

02:10:12.000 Why are you looking and just start throwing up? 0.99

02:10:14.000 Yeah, the bugs itself was not nearly as bad as bugs blended in with cheese.

02:10:19.000 Ugh. 0.74

02:10:20.000 That funky-ass cheese. 1.00

02:10:21.000 Shit. 1.00

02:10:21.000 The smell was just... 1.00

02:10:23.000 Especially if you didn't know what you were doing. 1.00

02:10:24.000 Like, if you smell certain cheeses, if you didn't know what you were eating, you'd be like, what the fuck? 0.99

02:10:29.000 Get this out of here. 0.99

02:10:30.000 But because you know it has a pleasant taste to it, you know it's cheese...

02:10:34.000 Your brain goes, yeah, oh, this smells funky.

02:10:36.000 Like, you'll smell some really weird cheese.

02:10:38.000 He's like, oh, wow, yeah, woo.

02:10:40.000 But then you eat it, like, whoa.

02:10:42.000 Oh, you feel the interesting flavors in your mouth.

02:10:45.000 So you associate it with a good thing, even though it smells funky.

02:10:48.000 There's a lot of cheese that literally smell like six-day-old nut sack, you know?

02:10:55.000 But like fat nut sack, like when you're overweight, like mine.

02:10:59.000 And it's not pleasant. 0.65

02:11:01.000 But once you get down to it...

02:11:04.000 The taste is very sweet.

02:11:05.000 Yeah.

02:11:06.000 The taste is different.

02:11:07.000 As is my nutsack, apparently.

02:11:10.000 How dare you. 0.99

02:11:13.000 Listen, I gotta get the fuck out of here. 0.99

02:11:15.000 Let's get out of here. 0.92

02:11:16.000 Let's go eat something.

02:11:17.000 I can't.

02:11:18.000 I have plans. 1.00

02:11:18.000 You're going into fucking ketosis. 1.00

02:11:20.000 Family stuff I have to do. 1.00

02:11:21.000 No, wait.

02:11:21.000 What are you going into?

02:11:22.000 You're going into the other one.

02:11:23.000 What's the other one you don't want to go into?

02:11:25.000 Oh, I don't know what the other one is.

02:11:26.000 The one you don't want to go into.

02:11:29.000 Whatever the one, the Carbo one.

02:11:31.000 Psychosis.

02:11:33.000 Action Bronson, thank you very much, sir.

02:11:35.000 Thank you, bro. 1.00

02:11:36.000 You're the shit. 1.00

02:11:36.000 It was a lot of fun. 1.00

02:11:37.000 It was cool hanging with you.

02:11:38.000 You're a very funny guy.

02:11:39.000 Good times.

02:11:39.000 And your show, if people want to watch it, how can they catch it?

02:11:42.000 Fuck That's Delicious. 1.00

02:11:43.000 It's all over the internet right now. 1.00

02:11:45.000 Go to YouTube, type in Fuck That's Delicious. 0.98

02:11:48.000 Type in my name, Action Bronson. 0.99

02:11:50.000 Google me.

02:11:53.000 February 29th, Viceland launches.

02:11:57.000 We're taking over History 2 channel.

02:11:59.000 So, we're going to be all over the place.

02:12:03.000 March 3rd, Thursdays, 10 o'clock. 0.99

02:12:05.000 Fuck That's Delicious on cable. 0.99

02:12:07.000 Every network possible. 1.00

02:12:09.000 You understand me?

02:12:10.000 I understand you.

02:12:11.000 Thank you, sir.

02:12:12.000 Appreciate it.

02:12:13.000 Thank you, brother.

02:12:14.000 Good night tomorrow.

02:12:15.000 Duncan Trussell tomorrow.

02:12:16.000 See you later.

The Joe Rogan Experience - February 23, 2016

Joe Rogan Experience #763 - Action Bronson

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript