The Joe Rogan Experience - August 29, 2016


Joe Rogan Experience #839 - Tom Papa

Topics
work environments virus dissemination collagen injection being a dad malaria medication going to Africa Justin Wren and his work with pygmies malaria pesticides and GMOs genetically modified foods Bury Me at Wounded Knee Dancing with Wolves movie fake Apple stores in China poaching is a symptom of poverty Cuban cigars Steven Seagal movies Nightbreed organized sports program Hashimoto's and Armour Thyroid effectiveness
Hosted by
Joe Rogan
Guests
Tom Papa
Mentioned
Praise Tom Papa Hillary Clinton Jamie Kevin Costner Steven Seagal Night Whitey Man The Matt Hughes Jack Nicholson Armour Thyroid Jesus Christ Paul Allen Bill Gates Drew Cigar Aficionado Craig Sheffer Doug Stanhope Wyatt Earp Ted Bundy Serengeti Clintons and 108 more
Joe Rogan Experience - Fight Companion - August 27, 2016 Joe Rogan Experience #840 - Donald Cerrone

Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 59 minutes

Words per minute

192.12

Word count

34,389

Sentence count

4,621

Harmful content

Misogyny

138

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1,020

sentences flagged

Hate speech

128

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Sourdough and the New York Times are best friends. Also, Israel wants to bulldoze a town called "Miserable Village" because it's a "miserable town" and they named it that because they like to talk about it that way. And a woman wrote an article that blamed the patriarchy for women drinking too much. And we're here to tell you that's not what it's really about, and it's not even close to what we think it's about. This week, we're joined by the Sultan of Sourdough, Tom Poppa, to discuss all things sourdough! And we talk about a lot of other things, too, but we're not going to spoil the episode with any of that. We're going to let you know that you're in for a treat, because we have a special treat for you today. We'll be back next week with a brand new episode of the podcast, and we'll be talking about a bunch of other stuff too, so don't miss it. We'll see you next week! Cheers, Tom & Pete Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. Artwork by Ian Dorsch. If you like what you hear on the pod, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts and tell us what you thought of the episode and what you think of it in the comments section. We'd love to hear from you! and we'd like to know who you think about it! Thank you so much, please rate and review the podcaster and review it on iTunes! if you're looking for a good podcaster, we'll send us your thoughts on your favorite podcaster or whatever you're listening to this week's podcaster is a review or review it and what's your favorite thing is your favorite podcast episode is your favourite thing! or your favorite moment from the pod is the best thing is the one you've listened to so far. Thank you for listening to the past week's episode so far? Thanks for listening and your feedback is very much appreciated. - Tom and Pete! - P.P. xoxo, Caitie - Caitie, Sarah and Sarah and the crew at the podcasting is out here! xo ( ) is a big thank you for all the work you've done so far!

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:04.000 And to this house we're born...
00:00:06.000 Tom Poppa, ladies and gentlemen!
00:00:08.000 The Sultan of Sourdough.
00:00:10.000 That's your nickname.
00:00:11.000 I love that.
00:00:12.000 I saw that this morning.
00:00:13.000 Yeah, the Sultan of Sourdough.
00:00:14.000 That's really badass.
00:00:16.000 New York Times.
00:00:17.000 They mentioned you in the New York Times.
00:00:19.000 Oh yes, the New York Times.
00:00:21.000 I talk about the New York Times and I keep my mouth closed when I say it.
00:00:24.000 The New York Times.
00:00:27.000 I'm now friends with the New York Times because of doing your podcast and hooking me up.
00:00:31.000 What is he like?
00:00:31.000 Or is it a she?
00:00:33.000 He's a great guy.
00:00:35.000 He's the gray old lady. 0.99
00:00:36.000 He's an old gray lady. 1.00
00:00:37.000 Yeah.
00:00:39.000 So when I was in New York, I went with my daughter.
00:00:41.000 They gave us a tour of the New York Times.
00:00:42.000 They invited us in anytime you want to come.
00:00:45.000 Because of the sourdough?
00:00:46.000 Because of the sourdough story.
00:00:47.000 That's incredible.
00:00:48.000 And because they saw it on this show.
00:00:50.000 That's incredible.
00:00:51.000 Yeah.
00:00:52.000 Wow.
00:00:52.000 This show brings me riches.
00:00:54.000 Dude, this show got an article written in the New York Times about sourdough bread and starters.
00:01:00.000 That was absolutely fascinating, though.
00:01:03.000 It was.
00:01:03.000 I had no idea.
00:01:04.000 Yeah, that's the new world.
00:01:06.000 I read an article today in the New York Times.
00:01:08.000 It was so disappointing, though.
00:01:09.000 It was some woman wrote an article blaming the patriarchy on women drinking too much.
00:01:16.000 Sexism...
00:01:17.000 On women drinking too much. 1.00
00:01:18.000 I'm like, is this the fucking New York Times? 0.99
00:01:20.000 Like, how desperado are they for ratings or for reading? 0.99
00:01:25.000 Sourdough starter.
00:01:26.000 America's rising pet.
00:01:27.000 There it is.
00:01:28.000 There's a better picture than that, though.
00:01:31.000 I don't remember what it was.
00:01:32.000 There it is!
00:01:33.000 There it is!
00:01:34.000 Tom Papa.
00:01:36.000 My little starter sitting on my counter.
00:01:39.000 That's awesome.
00:01:41.000 I was just stirring it up today. 0.97
00:01:43.000 There's a fucking really disturbing article that I read in the Washington Post this morning. 0.99
00:01:49.000 The news is getting fucking super wacky. 0.99
00:01:51.000 Glenn Greenwald tweeted it. 0.95
00:01:53.000 The Washington Post wrote an article about this settlement in Israel.
00:01:59.000 Settlement that they want to bulldoze.
00:02:06.000 And they called it a miserable town. 0.81
00:02:09.000 A miserable town. 0.98
00:02:10.000 Israel wants to bulldoze this miserable town. 0.98
00:02:13.000 And they're like, whoa, whoa, whoa. 1.00
00:02:15.000 Who fucking wrote this article? 0.99
00:02:17.000 How did you think the language? 1.00
00:02:20.000 I'm going to write miserable article. 0.58
00:02:22.000 You're dealing with dirt poor people that are living in these horrible conditions. 0.74
00:02:27.000 And they just decided to go with that as their title.
00:02:29.000 Look at this title.
00:02:30.000 Tell me, look at this.
00:02:31.000 Israel wants to bulldog... 0.94
00:02:32.000 Oh, they changed it to Ramshackle Village.
00:02:35.000 Ramshackle Village. 1.00
00:02:35.000 Oh, they changed it, those fucks. 1.00
00:02:38.000 But Europe is providing life support. 1.00
00:02:41.000 Wow.
00:02:41.000 It was miserable village this morning.
00:02:45.000 Ramshackle sounds kind of cute.
00:02:47.000 Ramshackle is still...
00:02:49.000 It's like they're trying.
00:02:50.000 Yeah, Ramshackle is like okay if it's white people. 0.99
00:02:53.000 If you're talking about white people that live in trailer parks, he's got a ramshackle trailer park. 1.00
00:02:58.000 Yeah, a corncob pipe and he hangs out and drinks from his jug at night.
00:03:01.000 He's got a bunch of cars on blocks in the yard.
00:03:04.000 It's old.
00:03:05.000 It's not fancy, but it sure is ramshackle.
00:03:08.000 Yeah, that makes sense.
00:03:09.000 But this morning, the title was Miserable.
00:03:13.000 Don't you feel that...
00:03:16.000 Writing in all of journalism, like, it's all leveled out.
00:03:19.000 Like, sometimes you read an article in the Huffington Post and they suck you into, like, some article.
00:03:23.000 And it's written by, like, a high school journalism student.
00:03:29.000 It's just sensational.
00:03:32.000 It just goes into three paragraphs in before it even comes out, like, the heading.
00:03:38.000 And then you read some stuff in the New York Times or other places.
00:03:42.000 And some of it's definitely much smarter, but some of it is a little opinionated, has these little things in it, and it's lazy.
00:03:49.000 It seems like because there's such a rush, you can't spend as much time on stories.
00:03:54.000 People get lazy and careless.
00:03:57.000 Well, I also think that when people are at their best, they write about what they love.
00:04:02.000 Like, if you read a really lazy article from a New York Times writer about something, maybe that guy would write an amazing article about handmade furniture.
00:04:10.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:04:11.000 Because maybe he's really into handmade furniture. 0.93
00:04:14.000 But there's a lot of articles that people are writing, and they're just fucking just trying to get them done. 0.88
00:04:17.000 Yeah. 0.78
00:04:18.000 But the problem is that a lot of that's in, like, news.
00:04:21.000 Yeah.
00:04:22.000 It's not, you know.
00:04:22.000 Well, don't you feel that way about the news sometimes?
00:04:24.000 Like, enough.
00:04:26.000 I just, I can't do this anymore.
00:04:27.000 You mean, digest the news?
00:04:29.000 Yeah.
00:04:29.000 Oh, forget it.
00:04:30.000 Yeah.
00:04:30.000 That's one of my crusades.
00:04:33.000 For real.
00:04:34.000 I get the newspaper in the morning because I want to spend maybe 20 minutes, maybe a half hour looking at some news stories, and then that's it.
00:04:43.000 That's all Tom Papa needs to know about the world's events, because I can't do anything about it.
00:04:48.000 And if I just check in another half hour, check in another half hour, 24 hours of that...
00:04:53.000 Your day's gone.
00:04:54.000 And you feel sick.
00:04:55.000 You're paranoid.
00:04:56.000 You're sick. 0.55
00:04:57.000 You're upset. 0.97
00:04:58.000 I turn the news off.
00:04:59.000 It's a barrage. 0.99
00:05:00.000 And I need to talk to the fucking New York Times about what constitutes breaking news. 0.99
00:05:05.000 Listen, New York Times, just because Anthony Weiner got busted sexting again, that's not fucking breaking news. 0.99
00:05:12.000 That's a pretty great story, though. 0.95
00:05:13.000 It's a good story, but it's not breaking news.
00:05:16.000 The New York Times is saying that's breaking news, though?
00:05:17.000 Breaking news is war.
00:05:18.000 Yeah.
00:05:19.000 War is breaking news.
00:05:20.000 Earthquake, breaking news.
00:05:21.000 Right.
00:05:22.000 Those are breaking news stories. 1.00
00:05:23.000 The other shit is just a story. 1.00
00:05:25.000 Yeah, right. 1.00
00:05:25.000 It's not breaking. 1.00
00:05:26.000 It's not super critical.
00:05:29.000 But, you know, you have to keep feeding the beast 24 hours a day, and they've got to keep you in, so they have to make it urgent.
00:05:35.000 Beast hungry.
00:05:38.000 Watch this video.
00:05:40.000 Insatiable desire for content.
00:05:43.000 By the way, I heard the earth is flat.
00:05:45.000 No, really?
00:05:46.000 Really?
00:05:47.000 Nom, nom, nom.
00:05:49.000 More content.
00:05:50.000 And how are they going to make you pay attention to the content? 0.70
00:05:53.000 By scaring the shit out of you. 0.92
00:05:54.000 Scaring the shit out of you or making you angry. 0.97
00:05:56.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:05:56.000 Or writing something ridiculous like, sexism is why women like to drink. 1.00
00:06:01.000 That is ridiculous. 0.99
00:06:02.000 Are you sure that was the New York Times? 0.99
00:06:05.000 100%.
00:06:05.000 100%.
00:06:06.000 Find it, Jamie.
00:06:08.000 Jamie's on it.
00:06:09.000 Because I was at the New York Times building because of the sourdough article.
00:06:12.000 And I saw no such thing.
00:06:14.000 It was pretty cool to watch.
00:06:15.000 I mean, it was cool to, like, be inside the New York Times.
00:06:18.000 Well, this was my point about Huffington Post when you were saying that it's written by a high school kid.
00:06:22.000 It could easily have been.
00:06:24.000 Yeah.
00:06:24.000 Like, there's a lot of contributors to the Huffington Post.
00:06:26.000 A lot of contributors to a lot of these online news sources.
00:06:30.000 Yeah.
00:06:30.000 How Wall Street bros talk women down.
00:06:33.000 That's not it.
00:06:34.000 No, it was out today.
00:06:36.000 Yeah, it's about sexism and drinking. 0.80
00:06:39.000 Sexism and drinking.
00:06:42.000 That the patriarchy makes women drink.
00:06:45.000 It was like the pressure of dealing with sexism all day makes women drink. 1.00
00:06:52.000 It's so unbelievably ridiculous, but for anybody who hates those arguments, it's beautiful because it's so stupid that it's like self-parody. 1.00
00:07:01.000 It's so dumb. 1.00
00:07:02.000 Oh, really? 1.00
00:07:02.000 That's what makes you drink? 1.00
00:07:03.000 Because everybody who doesn't drink, how come it doesn't work on them?
00:07:06.000 It's almost like that headline is to a level of, this will piss them off.
00:07:11.000 Yes.
00:07:11.000 Right?
00:07:12.000 Exactly.
00:07:12.000 And here we are talking about it.
00:07:14.000 Yeah.
00:07:14.000 So she might be right.
00:07:15.000 You know?
00:07:16.000 I mean, definitely women must face sexism. 1.00
00:07:19.000 Because a lot of men are sexist.
00:07:20.000 For sure.
00:07:21.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:07:22.000 But men are pigs. 1.00
00:07:24.000 If you have to work with a guy for eight hours a day for five years, if he's not gonna try to fuck you, he's gonna be thinking about fucking you all the time, and he's definitely gonna play like little games. 1.00
00:07:35.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:07:36.000 See how far he can go.
00:07:37.000 Yeah.
00:07:38.000 Test it.
00:07:38.000 See what he can say.
00:07:39.000 See what you say when he says this.
00:07:41.000 Look, we work with guys.
00:07:43.000 When they are completely free.
00:07:45.000 When we're alone with a guy, like when you're in school or whatever and working with people, you know, you get jobs with these men, you know. 0.99
00:07:52.000 And when we're alone with them, the shit that is said, I mean, right? 0.98
00:07:58.000 I mean, it's unfiltered. 1.00
00:07:59.000 It is brutal about everyone in the office, about their wives.
00:08:03.000 They're pulling out their parts.
00:08:05.000 It's not the same story.
00:08:06.000 This is the opposite of that.
00:08:07.000 It says sexism isn't driving women to drink. 1.00
00:08:10.000 I found something.
00:08:11.000 I'm not seeing something from the Times, though.
00:08:14.000 Okay, I'll send it to you.
00:08:15.000 I'll find it.
00:08:16.000 Here, I'll email it to you.
00:08:18.000 It doesn't matter.
00:08:19.000 I don't even need to look at it.
00:08:20.000 It's just an article.
00:08:21.000 But you know what I mean? 1.00
00:08:22.000 Men are such pigs. 1.00
00:08:23.000 We are pigs. 1.00
00:08:24.000 For sure. 1.00
00:08:24.000 You could be in an office with another guy and you know the coast is clear. 1.00
00:08:28.000 The stuff that is...
00:08:29.000 So for him to walk out and be as cool...
00:08:32.000 And we would both look at each other and go, you know, this never leaves this room.
00:08:35.000 Right.
00:08:35.000 And that would be it.
00:08:36.000 What I would do to her.
00:08:39.000 Conversations.
00:08:40.000 Oof.
00:08:40.000 And then they walk out among all the people, and that they can keep it together, like knowing what we know, that they can keep it together when they're mixed with everybody else is kind of astounding.
00:08:51.000 I feel like the more likely a man is to wear loafers with those tassels, the more likely he has to have these deep, dark visions and fantasies.
00:09:03.000 Absolutely.
00:09:03.000 You get out of him if you just get a couple cocktails in him.
00:09:07.000 Yeah, because he's probably pretty wealthy.
00:09:08.000 Yeah.
00:09:09.000 Probably makes a good living and probably has been married to the same woman for quite a long time, has children, probably has some sort of religious affiliation.
00:09:21.000 Yeah.
00:09:21.000 Most likely, depending upon the business you're in.
00:09:24.000 Right.
00:09:24.000 Yeah.
00:09:25.000 And deep desires.
00:09:28.000 The beast.
00:09:32.000 If you're working with that guy, it's almost crazier than living with him.
00:09:36.000 Think about it.
00:09:37.000 If your wife works all day, say if you work all day, your wife works all day, you're not seeing each other for nine hours out of the day.
00:09:45.000 Travel time.
00:09:46.000 This is if you're super lucky.
00:09:48.000 Then, you come home, how long are you awake for?
00:09:51.000 Yeah.
00:09:51.000 Three hours?
00:09:52.000 Four hours at the most?
00:09:54.000 Five?
00:09:54.000 And of those three hours, how much is, like, really good time with each other?
00:09:59.000 Exactly.
00:09:59.000 How much time is, like, stop fighting!
00:10:01.000 Don't do that!
00:10:01.000 That's not yours!
00:10:02.000 No, no, no.
00:10:03.000 Yours looks like that, but yours is different. 0.99
00:10:05.000 The reality is, if your wife works with some fucking creepy dude, that creepy dude sees her more than you do. 0.99
00:10:14.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:10:15.000 Yeah.
00:10:15.000 I think work environments are very strange for human beings.
00:10:18.000 I'm not saying that we shouldn't engage in them, but what I'm saying is that being in a traditional work environment where you're working your way up the corporate ladder so everybody's full of shit, everybody's at a certain point in time saying the thing that's the right thing to say for their career versus what they really feel about things. 0.68
00:10:33.000 Oh, yeah. 0.96
00:10:33.000 There's probably not a lot of room for opinion. 0.96
00:10:36.000 A lot of it is about the company and how important the company is. 0.97
00:10:39.000 And then fucking, if you're lucky, you get to like crack a joke by the water cooler, right? 0.98
00:10:43.000 That's like your little freedom of the day. 0.99
00:10:45.000 Or maybe they let you dress your cubicle up. 0.99
00:10:47.000 You could have like a little fucking Star Wars guy in your cubicle. 1.00
00:10:50.000 Joe's a wild man. 1.00
00:10:51.000 Show him your socks.
00:10:52.000 Look, I have the Death Star in my cubicle.
00:10:54.000 I'm a big Star Wars fan.
00:10:56.000 I can't wait for the next episode.
00:10:58.000 He's the guy when people come up to you and go, oh, there's a guy in my office.
00:11:02.000 He is so funny.
00:11:04.000 It's that Star Wars guy.
00:11:05.000 It's like that Thoreau quote, that most men live lives of silent desperation.
00:11:10.000 And I'm sure most women, too. 0.87
00:11:12.000 I think most humans. 0.98
00:11:13.000 There's a lot of doing shit you don't want to do. 0.98
00:11:16.000 Do you know what I find, though? 0.85
00:11:18.000 People who are in those jobs, and they get pretty high up, and they're creative people, whatever, they don't question things as much as we do.
00:11:29.000 They can't!
00:11:31.000 Yeah, but I think that's why they're able to get into it, also.
00:11:34.000 I don't think their heads are...
00:11:35.000 I wonder if that's what causes it.
00:11:39.000 Or if that's a mindset that one sort of boxes themselves into at an early age?
00:11:44.000 It's probably a little of both.
00:11:47.000 But I definitely have a couple friends who are just fun guys.
00:11:52.000 They've been working in corporations their whole careers, and they just don't question it.
00:11:57.000 There's never a part of them that's ever thought...
00:12:00.000 What am I doing?
00:12:01.000 They just got out of school and said, let's go, we're gonna go do this, and then I can go watch the Rangers and it'll be fine.
00:12:06.000 And they don't think about it.
00:12:07.000 And he was always that way.
00:12:08.000 He just kind of slid in, and it's almost like ignorance is bliss in those situations.
00:12:14.000 Well, those guys generally like to drink.
00:12:17.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:12:18.000 That's a big one, because the drinking is the best way to say who gives a fuck. 0.99
00:12:22.000 At the end of the day, when you're done with your work, you have a couple of pops with the boys, and all of a sudden you're laughing, who gives a shit about the stock profile? 0.99
00:12:29.000 Who gives a shit about the lawn? 0.99
00:12:31.000 Who gives a shit? 1.00
00:12:32.000 I would be in that environment like, oh my god, he's acting like a dick to me, and what is he trying to do, and why do they hate me so much? 1.00
00:12:40.000 Those guys are just like, screw him, he's an asshole. 1.00
00:12:42.000 Fuck that ass. 1.00
00:12:43.000 And they keep going. 1.00
00:12:43.000 And they keep going. 1.00
00:12:44.000 Hey, you gotta work with the guy.
00:12:45.000 Right, exactly.
00:12:48.000 What are you gonna do?
00:12:48.000 That's Don.
00:12:49.000 That's one of the things that separates alcohol from marijuana. 0.85
00:12:53.000 Like, that's like the dividing line between how it makes you look at things in your life that aren't desirable.
00:13:00.000 It changes them, like, really radically. 0.99
00:13:03.000 Because alcohol, like, ah, it gives a fuck. 0.98
00:13:05.000 But marijuana will go, dude, you gotta do something about this. 1.00
00:13:09.000 This is fucking with your head all the time. 1.00
00:13:11.000 And you know it's fucking with your head. 1.00
00:13:13.000 It's in the background of everything you do. 1.00
00:13:15.000 It's constantly looming over you, shadowing you, like a backhand.
00:13:19.000 What?
00:13:20.000 What about work?
00:13:21.000 What about this?
00:13:22.000 This is why you don't read philosophy.
00:13:24.000 You're just opening up, opening up, and there's no way to solve it.
00:13:27.000 It's the pot. 1.00
00:13:28.000 It's the goddamn pot. 1.00
00:13:29.000 That's why it's illegal. 1.00
00:13:30.000 It would ruin this fucking society. 1.00
00:13:33.000 It would ruin the fiber of society. 1.00
00:13:35.000 People would stop all these jobs. 0.94
00:13:38.000 I was hoping that pot legalization coincides with excellent new robots that can do shitty jobs. 0.96
00:13:45.000 That it all flows together.
00:13:46.000 The way you do with all those people that are now running through the streets.
00:13:49.000 Oh, Papa. 1.00
00:13:51.000 Oh, let the robots kill them? 1.00
00:13:52.000 The robots are going to eat them. 1.00
00:13:53.000 They're going to use them as fuel. 0.97
00:13:55.000 Didn't you see the Matrix?
00:13:56.000 Each robot that kills one of those people wears its face.
00:13:59.000 Yeah. 0.94
00:13:59.000 They're going to have a Taco Bell fan club, and whoever shows up, those are the first people that get eaten. 0.94
00:14:04.000 You know, things like that.
00:14:05.000 Things that are really obvious robot traps.
00:14:09.000 Water parks.
00:14:10.000 No, but those are kids.
00:14:12.000 I'm talking about for grown adults.
00:14:13.000 There's got to be some really obvious traps.
00:14:16.000 You've got to take care of us.
00:14:18.000 Robots just eat people.
00:14:19.000 You have to look at them.
00:14:19.000 There's a few rogue robots.
00:14:21.000 Like there's, you know, viruses that computers catch.
00:14:24.000 A few rogue robots found out they can eat people and they just go off and eat people.
00:14:28.000 But they're very ethical about it. 1.00
00:14:30.000 They eat the dumbest fucking people they could find. 1.00
00:14:32.000 It's like a crocodile doesn't go after the fastest gazelle. 1.00
00:14:35.000 It goes by that wounded motherfucker that limps up to the waterhole and just gets jacked. 0.99
00:14:41.000 The wounded old one that can't hear anything anymore. 1.00
00:14:43.000 It's got one gray eye.
00:14:45.000 Why is everybody running?
00:14:47.000 That's who the crocodile gets.
00:14:49.000 And so much like the crocodile, the robots that eat people will become like the natural predators, the weeders of the week.
00:14:58.000 Just walking through our culture.
00:15:00.000 They're no better than to just gang up and attack a city.
00:15:03.000 Because we'll just make it rain on them or something. 0.98
00:15:05.000 And they'll all rust and explode or something. 1.00
00:15:07.000 And we'll shoot them. 1.00
00:15:08.000 We have guns. 1.00
00:15:09.000 We know they're coming.
00:15:10.000 We can keep an eye on them. 1.00
00:15:12.000 But if they can just talk really fucking stupid people into traps and then just eat them. 1.00
00:15:17.000 And do our bidding. 1.00
00:15:18.000 Like a Taco Bell fan club.
00:15:19.000 Are you a fan of Taco Bell?
00:15:22.000 We are too!
00:15:23.000 Come celebrate Taco Bell fan night.
00:15:26.000 And you go there.
00:15:26.000 Come on down.
00:15:27.000 It's not even free food. 0.98
00:15:28.000 They just give away like Taco Bell t-shirts and hats and shit. 0.98
00:15:31.000 And people are like, I'm fucking psyched about Taco Bell, bro. 0.95
00:15:34.000 I got three choices on my corner. 0.96
00:15:35.000 I got Burger King, I got Wendy's.
00:15:36.000 I always go to Taco Bell. 1.00
00:15:38.000 Taco Bell's my shit. 1.00
00:15:39.000 Look at this free t-shirt. 1.00
00:15:40.000 They're the best.
00:15:41.000 They're the best.
00:15:42.000 The quality of their ingredients is unprecedented.
00:15:44.000 I got it.
00:15:45.000 They get me, man. 0.91
00:15:47.000 People will get fucking seriously into it. 0.96
00:15:49.000 Like, it would be ridiculous to get that way about Taco Bell, but it's not ridiculous to get that way over Apple. 0.98
00:15:54.000 Right. 0.99
00:15:54.000 Do you know how many fucking people... 0.99
00:15:55.000 When I was working on news radio, that was like during the days before OS X. So this was like the days of like Windows 95. And the operating system for Mac was all, like, it wasn't that good. 0.99
00:16:11.000 And the way I've seen it be described, like, the interface is really cool.
00:16:15.000 Like, the way you use it was very simple and easy to remember.
00:16:18.000 And a lot of creative type people like to use it for a bunch of different reasons.
00:16:22.000 But there was no memory protection.
00:16:25.000 There was no preemptive multitasking.
00:16:28.000 It was like a clunky operating system for, like, high-end users.
00:16:31.000 Like, they didn't code video games on them.
00:16:34.000 People that really needed them.
00:16:36.000 And obviously, I'm regurgitating, regurgitating, because I don't know shit about computers other than what I've read.
00:16:41.000 You're doing good.
00:16:41.000 I'm believing it.
00:16:42.000 These people that I was working with on news radio were fucking radical Mac fanatics. 0.99
00:16:49.000 Right. 0.99
00:16:49.000 They were radical. 0.99
00:16:50.000 And like the news would come out, well, we're going to get them with this new operating system.
00:16:53.000 This new operating system is me.
00:16:55.000 LSX was coming out.
00:16:56.000 I was like, we're going to get them with OSX. OSX. It was actually pre-OSX. I want to say OSX came out in the early 2000s.
00:17:05.000 Yeah, what was before that? 1.00
00:17:07.000 Shit. 1.00
00:17:07.000 It was terrible. 1.00
00:17:08.000 Yeah, but you used it.
00:17:10.000 I used it too.
00:17:11.000 I used to use it too because I remember there was no viruses for it.
00:17:16.000 No one had figured out how to make a virus for Macs yet, but there was a ton of them for PCs.
00:17:21.000 And I caught one once. 1.00
00:17:22.000 I caught a fucking bug, bro. 1.00
00:17:25.000 Dude, I caught it. 0.99
00:17:26.000 Somebody sent me a Microsoft Word package, a script or something like that, and I read it and it had a virus in it.
00:17:34.000 And then I sent something to a friend of mine, and it had the virus in it.
00:17:38.000 It had connected to all my Microsoft Word documents.
00:17:41.000 But my friend was like a super genius tech guy. 0.99
00:17:43.000 He's like, hey, fuckface. 1.00
00:17:44.000 He sent me a virus, you stupid cunt. 1.00
00:17:48.000 He knew right away. 1.00
00:17:49.000 Yeah, well, he scans all his email.
00:17:50.000 He's like super paranoid. 0.99
00:17:52.000 So he scanned his shit, and he's like, yeah. 0.99
00:17:55.000 This ain't working, bro. 0.99
00:17:57.000 I'm disseminating virus, folks.
00:17:58.000 Yeah.
00:18:00.000 I had to bring my daughters in to Apple because someone hacked all the browsers and just couldn't do anything.
00:18:07.000 And he went in there, this guy at the Genius Bar was...
00:18:10.000 Someone hacked the browsers?
00:18:11.000 What'd they do?
00:18:11.000 Yeah, they hacked the browsers.
00:18:13.000 Put a malware.
00:18:14.000 Malware.
00:18:14.000 It's called malware.
00:18:16.000 And how does that...
00:18:16.000 You get that from porn sites?
00:18:17.000 I hope not.
00:18:18.000 It's my daughter's computer.
00:18:20.000 How old is she? 0.98
00:18:20.000 14. Probably porn sites. 0.98
00:18:22.000 No!
00:18:24.000 No! 0.85
00:18:26.000 It's probably only a gay point though. 1.00
00:18:28.000 A bunch of dudes fucking each other. 1.00
00:18:30.000 If I was a girl, I'd want to know. 1.00
00:18:32.000 What are they doing over there?
00:18:35.000 And do I like it?
00:18:36.000 You know?
00:18:38.000 Because if guys stumble across a video of two girls fingering each other while making out real softly, we get very excited about it.
00:18:47.000 Like, whoa, look at this.
00:18:48.000 Whoa.
00:18:49.000 You feel like you've stumbled across something. 0.99
00:18:51.000 But if you stumble across two dudes butt-fucking, you're watching a crime. 0.98
00:18:57.000 Watching a violent encounter. 1.00
00:19:00.000 Even if they love each other, they'd probably say, look, I love you, you love me, but we're going to do some dirty shit to each other for the next whatever minutes it takes. 1.00
00:19:11.000 It's going to get ugly up with this bitch. 1.00
00:19:13.000 Well, the guy at the Genius Bar did not seem to think that's what my daughter was watching. 0.99
00:19:19.000 He said probably Spotify or Antara. 1.00
00:19:23.000 Fucking Spotify! 1.00
00:19:25.000 Spotify and their gay porn obsession. 1.00
00:19:27.000 But he just went in and ripped it all out. 0.96
00:19:29.000 He was just like, went in a couple files, like, oh, malware, yeah.
00:19:32.000 Look how they're directing you.
00:19:34.000 Look where they put the stuff in your extensions.
00:19:35.000 Whoa! 0.71
00:19:37.000 Yeah, and got it all out. 1.00
00:19:38.000 Fucking geniuses. 1.00
00:19:39.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:19:39.000 Well, that's a real genius at a Genius Bar. 1.00
00:19:41.000 He was.
00:19:42.000 He was pretty good.
00:19:43.000 Because that's a pretentious title.
00:19:44.000 Genius Bar.
00:19:45.000 I work at the Genius Bar at Apple.
00:19:47.000 Trust me.
00:19:48.000 I'm right.
00:19:48.000 The earth is flat.
00:19:50.000 Stop it.
00:19:53.000 The Earth's not flat.
00:19:54.000 Not anymore.
00:19:55.000 It's rounding itself out over the years.
00:19:57.000 It's gaining weight like all of us.
00:20:03.000 What were we talking about?
00:20:04.000 Oh, so this malware thing, they don't know where she got it from, but they could just pull it out?
00:20:09.000 Yeah, they just go in, they kind of just tore it all out.
00:20:13.000 They didn't have to reinstall the operating system or reformat the hard drive?
00:20:17.000 No, no, it's all good.
00:20:21.000 I wonder if it shows up in like Time Machine.
00:20:23.000 You know, you do your Time Machine backups.
00:20:25.000 I wonder if Time Machine backups have malware in them.
00:20:30.000 No, I don't think so.
00:20:31.000 No?
00:20:32.000 No.
00:20:32.000 They just backup critical files?
00:20:34.000 Yeah, and then it's another backup.
00:20:35.000 But if the files are infected, I mean, there's got to be a way.
00:20:38.000 How does Windows do it?
00:20:39.000 Do you know how Windows does their backups?
00:20:41.000 No idea.
00:20:42.000 Is it something that's done inside the operating system?
00:20:45.000 Everybody looks like I'm asking, do you know how to do Morse code?
00:20:47.000 Do you know smoke signals?
00:20:49.000 Windows, no!
00:20:50.000 Windows looks great to me.
00:20:52.000 I'm so confused. 0.99
00:20:53.000 And I know I'm an idiot, okay? 0.99
00:20:55.000 Don't get me wrong. 0.99
00:20:56.000 But I went to the store the other day because I'm buying a TV. I wanted to look at the newest TVs, which are fucking sweet. 0.96
00:21:04.000 With the curve? 0.98
00:21:05.000 Nah, I'm not into the curve.
00:21:07.000 That's a gimmick.
00:21:07.000 It's gonna go away.
00:21:08.000 Trust me.
00:21:09.000 The new one's the HPTI? Oh, the 4K? Yeah.
00:21:13.000 Good lord, they look good.
00:21:15.000 Do they?
00:21:15.000 Yeah, well, they get you at the store, first of all, because what they're showing you is a loop, and that loop is like super high-definition stuff.
00:21:24.000 It's all leopards and shit and fucking perfect snakes and flowers and waterfalls. 1.00
00:21:29.000 You're like, fuck! 1.00
00:21:30.000 Amazing music. 1.00
00:21:31.000 Yeah, I just want to stare at it all day.
00:21:33.000 I just want to look at this all day. 0.98
00:21:34.000 But if you went home and watched, like, you know, fucking Game of Thrones on it, it's not going to look that good. 0.98
00:21:39.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:21:39.000 I know. 0.99
00:21:40.000 Game of Thrones is not filmed like that.
00:21:42.000 It's not filmed in that super 4K. Yeah, what is?
00:21:45.000 Very few things.
00:21:46.000 Netflix is doing their specials in it, though.
00:21:48.000 They are?
00:21:49.000 My new Netflix special's in 4K. You can see how shitty I look in real life.
00:21:53.000 Yeah, it's a little too close. 0.87
00:21:54.000 You can see real deep, the slow deterioration of the aging process.
00:21:58.000 He has a lot of pores. 1.00
00:22:00.000 That motherfucker's getting skin on his face. 1.00
00:22:02.000 It's sort of loose. 1.00
00:22:03.000 See how it's like, it's there, but it's like...
00:22:05.000 It shakes.
00:22:06.000 It's not like...
00:22:08.000 Clinging on.
00:22:09.000 This is like this.
00:22:10.000 You don't go like from here to like Ted Kennedy.
00:22:14.000 It's not touted.
00:22:15.000 Remember Ted Kennedy before he died?
00:22:16.000 He had that...
00:22:17.000 Yeah, like a big basset hound.
00:22:18.000 Yeah.
00:22:20.000 You don't go from this manly chiseled face to that.
00:22:24.000 What you do is you go from this to what I got going on right now.
00:22:27.000 There's just a little too much elasticity.
00:22:29.000 A little loose.
00:22:30.000 A little too, not tight enough.
00:22:32.000 I want to say elasticity, yeah, because elasticity would allow it to snap back.
00:22:36.000 Yeah.
00:22:36.000 It's a little too little elasticity.
00:22:38.000 It's just getting kind of light and fluffy.
00:22:41.000 I need more collagen in my diet.
00:22:42.000 It's kind of falling off your face, and there's no way to stop it.
00:22:46.000 There is, apparently.
00:22:47.000 No, there's not.
00:22:47.000 Apparently, there's the same doctor who invented Regenikine, which is a process that I used to deal with a bulging disc.
00:22:55.000 They take your blood out, and it's kind of like platelet-rich plasma in a way, except they heat it up.
00:23:01.000 And by heating up your blood, your blood produces a response to the heat, and it creates this yellow serum.
00:23:08.000 And this yellow serum, they spin in a centrifuge and then extract that yellow serum.
00:23:12.000 And it's one of the most potent anti-inflammatory medicines ever.
00:23:15.000 Ever discovered?
00:23:17.000 I discovered a lot of inventions.
00:23:21.000 Ever discovered and your body doesn't reject it because it's your own blood.
00:23:24.000 And it has a great effect on people with like inflammation injuries and helping healing times.
00:23:29.000 So what did it do for you?
00:23:30.000 You had the...
00:23:31.000 My discs were bulging from repeated use from jiu-jitsu, from just too much sparring and not enough time off and getting injured and not taking enough time off in between the injury and getting right back into it.
00:23:42.000 Because jiu-jitsu is really fun.
00:23:45.000 It's really fun.
00:23:45.000 It's like a video game, like that kind of fun, or like I like to play pool.
00:23:51.000 But it's way more exciting than that.
00:23:52.000 And the only way you could do it, you've got to do it with your body.
00:23:55.000 So it's like you have this game piece that you're playing with, and this game piece is getting banged up all the time.
00:24:00.000 An old controller.
00:24:01.000 Yeah, and so I was developing some back issues from numb fingers, and usually those indicate that your disc is pushing against a nerve.
00:24:11.000 So it means the disc is bulging out.
00:24:12.000 So then I went through a bunch of things with spinal decompression, and And Regenikine was a big part of that.
00:24:19.000 So this guy who developed Regenikine, all these athletes like Peyton Manning, Kobe Bryant, they all flew to Germany to get this procedure.
00:24:28.000 And then slowly they brought it up to the United States and now they do it in California.
00:24:33.000 And they do it in Santa Monica is where I had it done, but I think they do it also in Dallas, and they do it in a couple other places, maybe Las Vegas.
00:24:41.000 The same doctor who came up with this procedure has some new procedure that they're preparing to release, which is going to kickstart the production of collagen in people. 0.99
00:24:51.000 And that is the thing that makes your skin look like shit. 0.99
00:24:54.000 That's the thing that makes your face sag, and your wrinkles appear, and your body just looks like an old bag. 1.00
00:24:59.000 What, your collagen goes away?
00:25:01.000 Exactly.
00:25:01.000 Collagen is like your...
00:25:03.000 Stuffing in your face, basically?
00:25:05.000 Your mushy stuffing?
00:25:06.000 Collagen is, it's responsible for a lot of the elasticity of your skin.
00:25:11.000 It's responsible for a lot of other things as well, but the elasticity of your skin is apparently a lot of it's based on your body's healthy production of collagen.
00:25:21.000 So we're losing it now, and we're getting...
00:25:23.000 Just a little loose underneath the jaw.
00:25:25.000 Just a little loose under this, yeah.
00:25:27.000 Right.
00:25:28.000 Thermatite.
00:25:28.000 What is this?
00:25:29.000 Injectable...
00:25:30.000 What is this?
00:25:30.000 What is this, Jamie?
00:25:32.000 This is a collagen injection.
00:25:34.000 Yeah.
00:25:34.000 It looks like just a little video of it.
00:25:36.000 Oh, this looks like they're tightening you down.
00:25:38.000 Oh, that's a collagen.
00:25:39.000 Right, people get collagen just injected into their face.
00:25:42.000 They get collagen injected.
00:25:43.000 How long does that last?
00:25:44.000 I don't know.
00:25:45.000 This is all new stuff that has been talked to me by people who have gone over to Germany and talked to this guy and had procedures done by this guy.
00:25:53.000 And did it help your spine?
00:25:55.000 Oh yeah, huge.
00:25:56.000 It did?
00:25:56.000 It made a big difference.
00:25:57.000 Really?
00:25:57.000 Big, big difference.
00:25:58.000 Yeah.
00:25:59.000 Yeah, big difference in relief, big difference in recovery time.
00:26:02.000 I did a bunch of different things.
00:26:03.000 I was pretty proactive about it.
00:26:05.000 The spinal decompression.
00:26:06.000 I did a lot of rolfing, which is like the super painful, torturous method of massage.
00:26:11.000 Right.
00:26:11.000 Where they're manipulating your limbs and digging their elbows into your back.
00:26:16.000 Sounds good.
00:26:18.000 Was this football player dude?
00:26:19.000 He was huge.
00:26:20.000 Right.
00:26:20.000 Big giant dude.
00:26:21.000 And just peed the crap out of you. 1.00
00:26:23.000 Oh, he fucked me up. 1.00
00:26:23.000 It was rough. 1.00
00:26:25.000 There's nothing worse than when you get a massage and it's just like this little girl hand. 0.95
00:26:28.000 I hate that.
00:26:29.000 Yeah, I'm used to the painful ones.
00:26:31.000 But those are the ones, the painful ones are the ones that break up the tissue and allow it all to relax and heal better.
00:26:37.000 And that helped a lot.
00:26:38.000 The decompression helped a lot.
00:26:40.000 That was a big part of it.
00:26:41.000 So are you able to tell how much this process helped?
00:26:44.000 Oh yeah, yeah.
00:26:44.000 I got an MRI. Oh yeah?
00:26:46.000 Well, I don't know how much that process helped overall because I did them all together.
00:26:50.000 Right.
00:26:50.000 But everything together worked awesome.
00:26:52.000 So I don't have a bulge at all anymore.
00:26:54.000 Which is really important to talk about because there's a lot of people that get bulging discs and they immediately want to go get surgery.
00:27:00.000 And in some cases that's the right move.
00:27:02.000 In some cases, like Eddie Bravo, a good friend of mine, had a disc replaced on his back.
00:27:08.000 And Eddie is a longtime jiu-jitsu guy and his disc had been squashed and deteriorated so much that it was essentially like bone on bone.
00:27:16.000 It was lower back.
00:27:17.000 Constant state of inflammation.
00:27:19.000 So in that case, the doctors decided it was a very smart move to replace the disc with these new titanium discs that they have.
00:27:27.000 They have some pretty cool artificial discs.
00:27:30.000 Yeah, it's got to be good.
00:27:32.000 But his was special case.
00:27:33.000 Yeah, his was really bad for a long period of time.
00:27:35.000 But there's other injuries where you could mitigate all the issues without surgery.
00:27:39.000 It's just going to take a little time.
00:27:41.000 Just like it took time to create the injury, it's going to take time to heal it.
00:27:44.000 And spinal decompression is big.
00:27:46.000 Even those things where you hang by your ankles, just doing that a little bit every day is really good for pain, really good for relief of your lower back.
00:27:55.000 There's also the other ones you could do with your neck.
00:27:56.000 I have one that's like a harness that straps to my neck, and it hangs from a door.
00:28:01.000 Oh, yeah?
00:28:01.000 Yeah, and then you can actually pull it, and it stretches your neck out.
00:28:04.000 You can feel it relaxing your neck.
00:28:07.000 It's attached to the door?
00:28:08.000 Yeah, it attaches to the top.
00:28:09.000 It's like a harness kind of thing for your head?
00:28:10.000 Yeah, it's like this metal bracket.
00:28:12.000 That clamps down on the top of the door, and then it has this arm that comes off of it, and then a rope comes down from the arm, which is attached to this Velcro face thing.
00:28:21.000 You put it on, you Velcro it in place so it's tight, and then you pull on the string.
00:28:24.000 It's like click, click, click, click, click, and it's just like a gentle pull on your neck.
00:28:29.000 I could use that right now.
00:28:31.000 Oh, it's great, man.
00:28:32.000 I'm not lying.
00:28:32.000 That's it right there.
00:28:33.000 That's what it looks like.
00:28:34.000 Oh, you look cool, too.
00:28:35.000 Ooh, yeah.
00:28:37.000 He looks like he has his head in a diaper.
00:28:40.000 As I pull on that thing, I can feel the relaxation.
00:28:43.000 And if you do it on a regular basis, it really does offer you some nice relief.
00:28:48.000 Again, no affiliation with any of these companies.
00:28:50.000 These are just some things I used.
00:28:52.000 You can put it in the door jam and not have it land on your head as you're hanging. 0.96
00:28:56.000 Yeah, you've got to be careful because one time it did fucking ding me in the head. 0.96
00:28:59.000 It did? 1.00
00:28:59.000 Yeah, I was an asshole. 1.00
00:29:00.000 I didn't tighten it down right. 1.00
00:29:02.000 That's what I'd be worried about. 0.97
00:29:03.000 And when it came down, it fucking dinged me in the forehead and left this big cut. 0.96
00:29:08.000 And I was doing all this press for Spike. 0.91
00:29:12.000 Spike TV, because it was at the same time where I was doing, or sci-fi rather, because it was the same time I was doing Joe Rogan Questions Everything, this TV show. 0.94
00:29:19.000 So all the press shit I did with a divot in my head, like this. 0.61
00:29:23.000 But for Spike, it probably helped. 0.99
00:29:25.000 It was sci-fi.
00:29:26.000 I don't know if it helped for sci-fi.
00:29:29.000 But anyway, those things were all really good.
00:29:31.000 Yeah, something happened just in the last two days, sleeping and woke up.
00:29:36.000 Can happen.
00:29:37.000 Yoga.
00:29:38.000 Oh, I love yoga.
00:29:39.000 Yoga's the thing, man.
00:29:40.000 Hot yoga. 0.98
00:29:41.000 That fucking clears all that up. 0.99
00:29:42.000 I don't like the hot yoga. 0.99
00:29:44.000 Oh, that's how to do it.
00:29:45.000 I like the regular yoga where I'm sweating like a pig already.
00:29:49.000 Yeah, but hot yoga just opens you up, baby.
00:29:52.000 Just an extra little millimeter of stretch you get out of it all.
00:29:55.000 No, it's too hot.
00:29:57.000 Yeah, but it's also mental toughness.
00:29:58.000 You've got to build mental toughness.
00:30:00.000 90 minutes in that class.
00:30:01.000 I'm tough enough.
00:30:02.000 You are tough enough.
00:30:03.000 What do I need it for?
00:30:04.000 I don't know.
00:30:04.000 How tough do I have to be?
00:30:05.000 That's what I'm just saying.
00:30:06.000 I just got to pick my kids up and try not to drink.
00:30:11.000 I think sexism is causing you to drink. 0.65
00:30:15.000 I've been meaning to talk to you.
00:30:17.000 Really?
00:30:18.000 I mean, look, we all know that men are awful, and we attack and do horrible things, and you've yelled at us now, and we're dealing with it.
00:30:27.000 Now back off. 0.61
00:30:28.000 We know there's a problem.
00:30:29.000 We're working on it.
00:30:31.000 Don't have to write articles 12 times a day.
00:30:33.000 Is it okay to only want to work with men?
00:30:37.000 Say if you start a company.
00:30:39.000 At what size can the company be before you've got to start hiring women? 1.00
00:30:43.000 Like right now, Joe Rogan Experience, Enterprises, very small company.
00:30:46.000 There's only a couple employees.
00:30:49.000 And they happen to be male.
00:30:51.000 One more hire.
00:30:52.000 But what if we keep going?
00:30:53.000 What if eventually I hire 50 people?
00:30:56.000 Was anybody going to say, why do you have 50 dudes?
00:30:58.000 Yeah!
00:30:59.000 How come?
00:31:00.000 Because you're not meeting the quota.
00:31:03.000 Is that really the case, or is it that these are the people that I want, and I just happen to find out they're all men?
00:31:10.000 You have to, at a certain...
00:31:12.000 Now you have to hire and meet these numbers.
00:31:14.000 What's the number, though?
00:31:16.000 The number is probably like 40% of your staff.
00:31:21.000 No, no, no.
00:31:21.000 I mean, at what number does your...
00:31:22.000 I can get away with it with two people.
00:31:24.000 I think, yeah, I think if you bring in one more person...
00:31:27.000 Really?
00:31:27.000 It's going to be a problem.
00:31:29.000 If I bring in one girl, it's going to be a problem. 1.00
00:31:32.000 She's going to hear some of the shit Jamie says when the mic's off. 1.00
00:31:34.000 She's going to go, what the fuck? 1.00
00:31:36.000 She's just going to be quietly building a case against you. 1.00
00:31:38.000 Jesus Christ!
00:31:39.000 Dude, that does happen, man.
00:31:41.000 Yeah, look at Anthony Weiner.
00:31:43.000 Well, that's a different case.
00:31:45.000 But I know this girl who worked with this guy.
00:31:49.000 This is actually the sister of a good friend of mine.
00:31:52.000 Why am I giving you all the details?
00:31:54.000 You're going to know who it is.
00:31:55.000 Anyway, she worked with this guy for years, writing down any time he said anything inappropriate and building a file.
00:32:02.000 But all anecdotal.
00:32:04.000 I mean, all, you know, clearly her word against his that he said all these things.
00:32:09.000 But she made this file of all the inappropriate things that he had said at picnics included everywhere.
00:32:15.000 Company picnics.
00:32:16.000 She wrote a bunch of things down.
00:32:17.000 And she was thinking about suing the company. 1.00
00:32:19.000 I was like, bitch, they are going to bury you. 1.00
00:32:21.000 Are you out of your fucking mind? 1.00
00:32:22.000 Oh, my God. 1.00
00:32:23.000 Like, what were these things? 0.99
00:32:25.000 Unless they were, like, really fucked up. 0.96
00:32:28.000 But that's the thing, like you were saying before, about why working in a corporation would be so bizarre. 0.96
00:32:34.000 He's thinking that he has a good relationship with her, and she probably doesn't dislike him.
00:32:40.000 You know what I mean?
00:32:41.000 There's this play acting that they're doing all the time.
00:32:44.000 No one's really being honest, ever.
00:32:46.000 There's also the real possibility that you could make some money if you sue them.
00:32:51.000 Yeah!
00:32:52.000 Big money!
00:32:53.000 Kids grow up today knowing about...
00:32:56.000 Here's a lawsuit example that's insane.
00:32:59.000 There was a woman... 0.99
00:33:00.000 Who was a single woman, a single mom, and she had this kid, and she brought the kid over to my house, and the kid stayed over to my house for a long-ass time. 1.00
00:33:10.000 Like, she was supposed to pick the kid up at four, and then she didn't show up until eight.
00:33:14.000 Oh, boy.
00:33:14.000 It was weird.
00:33:15.000 It was weird.
00:33:16.000 It was one of those weird ones.
00:33:17.000 It's really neat.
00:33:18.000 And she was also just slightly sketchy.
00:33:21.000 It was just something slight...
00:33:22.000 And this is one of the things you deal with when you deal...
00:33:24.000 You know, your kids are going to school.
00:33:25.000 Yeah.
00:33:26.000 A bunch of different people you run into, and then...
00:33:28.000 You have to interact with these people.
00:33:29.000 You're not exactly sure what to get out of it.
00:33:31.000 So she left her kid at this other lady's house, and the other lady had a little dog. 1.00
00:33:36.000 I mean, a little fucking dog. 0.99
00:33:37.000 The dog jumped up and did the pawing thing and left a visible scratch on the girl's leg. 1.00
00:33:42.000 She sued them for $100,000.
00:33:46.000 What?
00:33:47.000 Yeah.
00:33:48.000 What?
00:33:49.000 Yeah.
00:33:50.000 She said the dog attacked her daughter.
00:33:52.000 Might be 50 grand.
00:33:54.000 Maybe she got 50. That is gross.
00:33:56.000 Trying to remember what the numbers were.
00:33:57.000 But it was like, whoa.
00:33:59.000 Oh my god.
00:34:01.000 This was this lady saying, we're in.
00:34:03.000 We got a shot here.
00:34:06.000 Got a shot here at some money.
00:34:07.000 With people you go to school with and see all the time. 0.98
00:34:09.000 That's how awful you are. 0.87
00:34:11.000 It was just, the dog didn't bite anybody. 0.97
00:34:13.000 It just jumped up because it got excited.
00:34:15.000 It's being a dog.
00:34:16.000 Like dogs do.
00:34:16.000 Yeah.
00:34:16.000 And it, you know, I could get, if it was my dog and he did it to someone's daughter, I'd be very upset.
00:34:22.000 I'd do whatever the fuck I could do to make it better. 0.98
00:34:25.000 Right. 0.99
00:34:25.000 But it's not like the dog was a biter. 0.99
00:34:28.000 But legally...
00:34:29.000 Like a bad dog. 0.60
00:34:30.000 Yeah.
00:34:31.000 Legally, does she have a case?
00:34:33.000 You're coming into a house with a dog.
00:34:35.000 The issue is, with a lot of lawsuits, it will cost you more to fight it than it will for you to just settle.
00:34:43.000 So a lot of people just settle.
00:34:44.000 Say it'll cost you $10,000 to settle, but it'll cost you $50,000 to fight it.
00:34:48.000 That's all real.
00:34:50.000 People have to consider those things.
00:34:51.000 You should fight it, though, just to stick it to her.
00:34:54.000 Well, the UFC told us to not take photos choking people.
00:34:58.000 Like, people ask you, hey, put me to rear naked choke, because two people got sued.
00:35:03.000 One of them was Chuck O'Dell, and one of them was Matt Hughes.
00:35:05.000 The Matt Hughes one is crazy, because this guy asks Matt Hughes to put him in a chokehold. 1.00
00:35:10.000 People do that shit all the time. 0.99
00:35:12.000 Matt obliges him. 0.99
00:35:13.000 Then the guy uses the photo.
00:35:15.000 Tries to sue Matt Hughes, says Matt hurt him, and here's the evidence, the photo evidence that he hurt him.
00:35:21.000 Then, here's where it gets even crazier.
00:35:22.000 They do an investigation of this guy, find out he's a cop. 0.99
00:35:26.000 Then, they go deeper, find out he's a dirty cop. 0.57
00:35:29.000 And he gets arrested and kicked off the force. 0.97
00:35:34.000 Oh, man. 0.96
00:35:35.000 Well, he's a scam artist. 0.99
00:35:36.000 Yeah, he's a scammer. 0.94
00:35:36.000 I mean, he's a scammer that just happened to figure out how to become a cop. 0.94
00:35:40.000 Ugh, gross. 0.99
00:35:41.000 You know, he hadn't fucked up enough by the time he was, you know, X amount of years old that he couldn't get disqualified from being a cop. 1.00
00:35:48.000 Jeez. 0.99
00:35:49.000 Isn't that crazy? 0.54
00:35:49.000 That is gross. 0.54
00:35:51.000 Yeah.
00:35:52.000 I know.
00:35:52.000 That's another reason why you shouldn't let your kids play with other kids.
00:35:57.000 Yeah, you gotta keep them at home, right?
00:35:59.000 Don't ever let them out.
00:36:00.000 Man, just having to talk to everybody when they're picking up the kids.
00:36:05.000 You know what's great, though, dude?
00:36:06.000 They don't want to talk to you, you don't want to talk to them, and the kids won't put their shoes on, and you're standing there for a half hour just staring at each other trying to get through it.
00:36:13.000 Leave the shoes on and stay inside.
00:36:15.000 You know what I mean?
00:36:16.000 Yeah, I do.
00:36:17.000 It's hard.
00:36:18.000 But don't you love it when you find a parent that you actually like?
00:36:21.000 For sure.
00:36:22.000 Oh, that's an oasis.
00:36:23.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
00:36:24.000 That's an oasis in the fucking desert. 1.00
00:36:26.000 Thank God. 1.00
00:36:28.000 They're laughing.
00:36:30.000 They're normal.
00:36:30.000 Right.
00:36:31.000 Oh my God, they can talk to me.
00:36:33.000 Yeah, I can drink with this guy, no problem.
00:36:35.000 I can talk to them.
00:36:36.000 Right.
00:36:36.000 We're going to be friends.
00:36:37.000 Holy shit, I can't believe I'm going to be friends with a parent. 1.00
00:36:40.000 We found one. 1.00
00:36:42.000 I knew they were out there.
00:36:43.000 Then do you meet parents who you know don't like you?
00:36:45.000 Oh, yeah.
00:36:46.000 Yeah, for sure.
00:36:47.000 You just feel it.
00:36:48.000 For sure.
00:36:49.000 You can just feel it.
00:36:49.000 Yeah.
00:36:50.000 You're always going to have that, man.
00:36:51.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:36:52.000 There's going to be parents who want to fuck your wife. 1.00
00:36:54.000 What? 1.00
00:36:54.000 For sure. 1.00
00:36:55.000 No.
00:36:55.000 Yeah, they're going to meet her.
00:36:56.000 They're going to say, maybe if Tom dies, I'm in.
00:36:59.000 Yeah.
00:37:00.000 I just know that I could do a better job.
00:37:02.000 There's a couple I can name.
00:37:03.000 He doesn't understand.
00:37:04.000 She's complicated, you know?
00:37:07.000 She's not difficult.
00:37:08.000 She just requires more and gives more back. 1.00
00:37:11.000 That's so...
00:37:11.000 It's complicated.
00:37:12.000 I'm not.
00:37:12.000 I'm not saying it's bad.
00:37:15.000 I mean, he goes on the road a lot.
00:37:17.000 I'm just saying I wouldn't do that.
00:37:18.000 I wouldn't go on the road.
00:37:20.000 What would I do?
00:37:21.000 I'd be a stay-at-home dad.
00:37:22.000 I'd adjust my income accordingly.
00:37:24.000 I mean, because I just feel like being with you would be more important than getting applause from strangers.
00:37:28.000 Well, first and foremost, I'm a feminist. 0.96
00:37:31.000 And as a feminist, I always do what women want me to do. 1.00
00:37:36.000 He doesn't tell you you're beautiful every day.
00:37:38.000 I mean, I'm not judging him.
00:37:40.000 I would do it.
00:37:41.000 That's a requirement.
00:37:42.000 That's something you have to say.
00:37:44.000 It's just something you want to say anyway.
00:37:47.000 And I would want to say, especially since it's true.
00:37:50.000 But it's true.
00:37:51.000 And you say it.
00:37:53.000 Okay?
00:37:53.000 You just do.
00:37:54.000 Just do better.
00:37:56.000 Just do better.
00:37:57.000 Period.
00:37:58.000 Just do better.
00:38:03.000 It's hard being a dad.
00:38:05.000 But you know what I'm finding is the older you get, the less you run into people.
00:38:08.000 Because once they're in high school, they start to just...
00:38:11.000 They don't involve the parents at all.
00:38:13.000 They don't want the parents around.
00:38:14.000 Right.
00:38:15.000 Now, you have to make an effort to be like, Hey, I want to see some of these parents before I let you go over to their house.
00:38:21.000 Because now it's getting real.
00:38:22.000 It's a good point.
00:38:23.000 Yeah, because they're...
00:38:24.000 It's when they're little. 1.00
00:38:25.000 Those fucking weirdos. 1.00
00:38:26.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:38:26.000 When they're little, they really have you... 1.00
00:38:28.000 There's some weird stuff that goes on.
00:38:30.000 Like, people having parties at, like...
00:38:32.000 My daughter had, she was 12, I think, or 13. And the party, the kids' party was held at the stand.
00:38:40.000 Not the stand, the strand.
00:38:42.000 You know, the fancy hotel on Sunset.
00:38:44.000 Really?
00:38:45.000 What's it, the stand?
00:38:47.000 I think it's the stand.
00:38:48.000 Standard.
00:38:49.000 Standard.
00:38:49.000 Thank you.
00:38:50.000 This is how uncool I am.
00:38:51.000 I've gotten there twice.
00:38:53.000 I've eaten there a hundred times.
00:38:53.000 We work at the Comedy Store across the street.
00:38:56.000 Literally across the street.
00:38:57.000 Have you ever gone to that diner there?
00:38:58.000 It's open really late.
00:39:00.000 It might be 24 hours.
00:39:01.000 Oh, yeah?
00:39:01.000 Yeah.
00:39:02.000 It's amazing.
00:39:03.000 It's really good food.
00:39:03.000 But it's also a place where when you're new to Hollywood, you have parties there and there's a lot of people with coke and running around naked.
00:39:09.000 Dude, I took a picture.
00:39:10.000 I was there once.
00:39:11.000 Rampage Jackson came out of the back with sunglasses on, no shirt on, and a fur coat and two super hot Chinese chicks. 1.00
00:39:19.000 And I took a picture of him.
00:39:21.000 It was back in the day before Instagram and Twitter.
00:39:24.000 I put it up online somewhere.
00:39:25.000 I doubt if you can find it. 1.00
00:39:28.000 If you can find that, you're a fucking wizard. 1.00
00:39:30.000 But that is the standard. 0.99
00:39:31.000 It's probably from like 2004 or something like that.
00:39:35.000 It's still the same today.
00:39:36.000 And my daughter's like, they're having a party.
00:39:39.000 In the one room and the parents are having a party in the other room. 0.98
00:39:43.000 That's ridiculous. 0.99
00:39:44.000 It's just parties that want to get fucked up and then we'll put the kids in that room. 1.00
00:39:48.000 Oh my god. 0.98
00:39:48.000 So my daughter was going to go to a party. 0.98
00:39:51.000 I'm not dropping you off at valet at the standard. 1.00
00:39:54.000 That's so stupid. 1.00
00:39:55.000 Definitely fucked up things are going to happen. 1.00
00:39:57.000 Those parents aren't paying any attention. 0.99
00:39:59.000 No!
00:39:59.000 They're trying to bone each other.
00:40:00.000 L.A., you know.
00:40:02.000 There's an instance of parents boning each other.
00:40:05.000 Oh, yeah?
00:40:06.000 Yeah.
00:40:07.000 Not in my kid's school, but one of my kid's friend's school.
00:40:11.000 Really?
00:40:12.000 The moms are all talking about it. 0.97
00:40:14.000 That's good stuff.
00:40:15.000 Parents got together.
00:40:17.000 They got they freak on.
00:40:20.000 You know it's the sign?
00:40:21.000 You know it's the sign?
00:40:22.000 What?
00:40:22.000 When they want to travel with you.
00:40:24.000 That's when it all goes down.
00:40:26.000 The swapping happens a lot on those vacations.
00:40:29.000 When someone comes to you and is like, hey, you want to go to the Grand Canyon with me and Carol?
00:40:34.000 We all camp.
00:40:35.000 Yeah.
00:40:37.000 Yeah, you don't want camping.
00:40:39.000 Camping's a bad one.
00:40:40.000 Camping's tough.
00:40:41.000 You gotta do, like, hotels where there's, like, a gym that's 24 hours and it's, like, the middle of the night.
00:40:46.000 You're like, I just feel like getting a lift in.
00:40:51.000 And you both scoot off to one of those massage rooms.
00:40:55.000 I think camping would be an easy one too.
00:40:57.000 Just going to the bathroom in the woods.
00:40:59.000 The problem is the woods are quiet.
00:41:03.000 Yeah, you're going to hear everything.
00:41:05.000 You're going to hear it all.
00:41:06.000 It's just the woods are not the best sleep either.
00:41:11.000 You wake up real easy.
00:41:13.000 You're kind of on edge because you're sleeping on the ground with animals.
00:41:18.000 You're laying on the ground where animals live.
00:41:23.000 Hey, I just got back from Africa.
00:41:26.000 Oh, yeah, you're right.
00:41:27.000 I slept in a tent like that.
00:41:30.000 Oh, my God.
00:41:31.000 It's not a floppy tent, but like a...
00:41:33.000 A wall tent?
00:41:34.000 A wall tent.
00:41:35.000 Yeah, where'd you go?
00:41:36.000 And listen to lions all night long.
00:41:38.000 Literally.
00:41:40.000 It sounded like it was literally in our bed.
00:41:44.000 Is that safe?
00:41:46.000 For hours.
00:41:46.000 He was about...
00:41:49.000 About 300 yards away.
00:41:51.000 Oh, totally safe.
00:41:52.000 With a dead zebra.
00:41:54.000 And he was basically through the night telling his family, you know, for miles.
00:42:00.000 Where the zebra is?
00:42:01.000 Hey, that's the line I took.
00:42:02.000 Hey, that's my thing.
00:42:03.000 That's your Instagram page, fella.
00:42:06.000 Tom Papa.
00:42:07.000 Literally, like, hearing...
00:42:10.000 It felt like they were literally in our tent.
00:42:12.000 And what part of Africa did you go to?
00:42:14.000 Tanzania.
00:42:15.000 Tanzania.
00:42:15.000 See, I was going to go to Tanzania, but I was scared that I would have had to give my kids a shot.
00:42:21.000 Yeah, I did.
00:42:22.000 How old are your kids?
00:42:24.000 11 and 14. And they had to get a typhoid shot.
00:42:28.000 They didn't have to get malaria?
00:42:30.000 We took malaria medication once a day.
00:42:34.000 How bad is it?
00:42:35.000 It gives you crazy vivid dreams.
00:42:38.000 People had said it might give us nightmares.
00:42:40.000 We would just come down in the morning like, what did you dream last night?
00:42:44.000 Wow.
00:42:45.000 I mean, like, so crystal clear, 4K, vivid dreams.
00:42:51.000 Really wild.
00:42:52.000 And as soon as you went off, the dreams went away.
00:42:55.000 And how long did you have to take it for?
00:42:57.000 Two days before you go, the whole time you're there, and then...
00:43:01.000 A week after.
00:43:02.000 The whole time you're there, you take it?
00:43:04.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:43:04.000 Does it fuck you up? 0.99
00:43:05.000 Malaria is real. 0.98
00:43:06.000 It's around.
00:43:06.000 It makes your stomach a little...
00:43:08.000 My wife's stomach was a mess because of it. 1.00
00:43:12.000 But that's it?
00:43:13.000 Just stomach ache?
00:43:14.000 Excuse me, yeah.
00:43:15.000 Which can definitely fuck up your enjoyment of this experience, right?
00:43:19.000 Yeah, but you know what?
00:43:20.000 Going to the bathroom a couple times to be six feet from a lion is like...
00:43:24.000 Yeah.
00:43:24.000 You just do it.
00:43:26.000 You know, I don't like that stuff.
00:43:27.000 I always feel like I'm going to get bit by a bug and never survive.
00:43:30.000 I feel like my kids are just too young for that.
00:43:32.000 How old are they?
00:43:33.000 Six and eight.
00:43:34.000 I just don't want to give them malaria medication.
00:43:36.000 They are.
00:43:37.000 Yeah.
00:43:38.000 Mine are 11 and 14, and this was the perfect time to take them.
00:43:44.000 The 14-year-old and the younger one at 11 is like, she's good.
00:43:50.000 She can travel.
00:43:51.000 She can eat food.
00:43:51.000 She can swallow pills.
00:43:52.000 She's like a person.
00:43:54.000 Any earlier than this, it would have been hard.
00:43:57.000 Yeah, it's got to be amazing though, huh?
00:44:00.000 It's amazing.
00:44:01.000 It's kind of, it's mind-blowing.
00:44:04.000 You definitely have, you know, it's like one of those things, like you go on vacation, you're like, oh, this is going to blow me away.
00:44:10.000 You kind of have all these anticipation.
00:44:13.000 But then it always becomes a little more simple than that.
00:44:15.000 You just kind of hang in this place.
00:44:18.000 And...
00:44:19.000 By the end of it, you come back.
00:44:20.000 You're like, I'm still thinking about it.
00:44:23.000 You know what I mean?
00:44:23.000 It's like seeing a great movie and you can't get it out of your head.
00:44:26.000 It's like these things are...
00:44:28.000 Going to Africa is pretty... 0.98
00:44:29.000 It's pretty deep.
00:44:31.000 You know, like you really see just the beginning of everything.
00:44:36.000 Wow.
00:44:37.000 It's kind of...
00:44:39.000 And it's just cool just being by these animals.
00:44:42.000 I mean, you literally buy all these animals.
00:44:44.000 About Africa, it's not just the beginning of everything, but in a lot of ways, it's still like that.
00:44:49.000 Yeah.
00:44:50.000 Like, it's one of the few places where you can go and there's indigenous tribes essentially all over the continent that are living in a, you know, really kind of primitive way. 0.90
00:45:01.000 We took a balloon ride and the balloon guy...
00:45:04.000 We took a balloon ride?
00:45:05.000 Yeah.
00:45:05.000 Like, this isn't dangerous enough.
00:45:06.000 We're going to add...
00:45:09.000 And this was right after the crash.
00:45:12.000 But anyway, we got in the balloon.
00:45:13.000 It wasn't the safest.
00:45:14.000 And he got off course.
00:45:16.000 So we drifted out of the Serengeti and the Grumetti River.
00:45:20.000 And we're just kind of going for a little bit.
00:45:22.000 And he brought it down in this clearing.
00:45:24.000 We ended up a little upside down.
00:45:27.000 A tribe that lives there comes running out.
00:45:31.000 They saw us coming down.
00:45:32.000 They started running.
00:45:33.000 They got sticks and robes.
00:45:36.000 And they come running.
00:45:37.000 And we land.
00:45:39.000 They've never seen this before.
00:45:40.000 They've never seen us before.
00:45:42.000 They've never seen this before.
00:45:43.000 And they're like, my daughter held up a cell phone and boys who are older than her, probably, you know, 15, ran, literally ran at the sight of a cell phone.
00:45:55.000 And it was like, and they're so primitive.
00:45:59.000 They're so basic.
00:46:00.000 They're living in these little places, just raising cattle and just doing their primitive things.
00:46:05.000 But I think I was more scared of them than the kids running from the cell phone.
00:46:11.000 Like, I didn't know.
00:46:12.000 I've only heard, like, Rwanda, you know, or the Bokram thing.
00:46:15.000 And I'm like, I don't know these people.
00:46:17.000 They could eat you.
00:46:18.000 Yeah, they've got a robe on, but I've got two daughters with me, you know?
00:46:22.000 Yeah.
00:46:23.000 Who knows, this guy just gets in my face chewing on a root and getting crazy and like, I'm taking that one.
00:46:29.000 You landed in my territory.
00:46:31.000 I'm taking that one.
00:46:32.000 Dude.
00:46:33.000 You know what I mean?
00:46:34.000 Would you be uneasy? 1.00
00:46:35.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
00:46:35.000 I was uneasy. 1.00
00:46:37.000 Yeah, well, you don't know how to speak their language.
00:46:39.000 No. 0.99
00:46:39.000 If you land in a fucking balloon in South Central Chicago or South Side of Chicago, you're in trouble. 0.99
00:46:45.000 Right. 1.00
00:46:46.000 Right?
00:46:46.000 Right.
00:46:47.000 You could land in a bad neighborhood anywhere in America in a fucking balloon and get in a heap load of trouble. 0.99
00:46:51.000 But I felt bad about myself that I'm assuming that I'm landing in that these people must be trouble. 0.99
00:46:59.000 But instinct kind of kicks in, you know what I mean?
00:47:01.000 What if you landed in like the swamps of Louisiana and nobody could hear you scream?
00:47:06.000 You wouldn't be weird? 0.99
00:47:07.000 Like if you landed in some fucking strange little swamp town? 0.99
00:47:10.000 Or a bunch of people just gator hunting. 0.99
00:47:12.000 That's all they do is to hunt gators. 0.95
00:47:14.000 That's what it is.
00:47:15.000 It's the unknown.
00:47:16.000 It's not knowing.
00:47:17.000 All I needed was someone to say, have the balloon guy be like, these people are cool.
00:47:21.000 Yeah, these are my friends.
00:47:22.000 Hello!
00:47:23.000 Right, they're mellow.
00:47:24.000 But no one was saying that.
00:47:25.000 Everyone was a little nervous too.
00:47:27.000 They cut hands and then they do the blood brother thing.
00:47:31.000 Like outlaw Josie Wales. 1.00
00:47:33.000 Right.
00:47:35.000 He is my brother.
00:47:36.000 He's my brother.
00:47:36.000 My brother of the jungle.
00:47:38.000 They do that fake thing where they're about to fight and then hug at the last minute.
00:47:42.000 Like a terrible movie from like a Crocodile Dundee type movie.
00:47:48.000 But you know what?
00:47:49.000 The people like the guy, the safari guy that came to pick us up and drive us back and he wasn't...
00:47:55.000 Cool with being there either.
00:47:56.000 Oh, really?
00:47:57.000 No.
00:47:58.000 He was a little nervous.
00:47:59.000 He was kind of like checking around and like, okay, let's go.
00:48:01.000 Oh, God.
00:48:02.000 He's like, you don't know.
00:48:05.000 They could ask for money because you landed on their bushes.
00:48:08.000 You know what I mean?
00:48:09.000 Right.
00:48:10.000 Anything could go down.
00:48:10.000 I know a dude who went there, and he went there for a hunting trip.
00:48:14.000 And while he was there, he got sick.
00:48:17.000 And the nearest hospital from where he was hunting was like six hours in a truck.
00:48:22.000 And so he got so sick, he had to go to the hospital.
00:48:25.000 Wow.
00:48:25.000 So they put him in the back of his truck.
00:48:26.000 He's lying down, trying to not throw up and just trying to relax over this six-hour drive to the hospital.
00:48:33.000 And they stop him for gas along the way, and a gunfight breaks out.
00:48:38.000 And the truck he's in gets hit with gunfire.
00:48:41.000 Where?
00:48:41.000 What part?
00:48:42.000 Who the fuck knows? 1.00
00:48:43.000 Who cares? 1.00
00:48:43.000 Some Africa-like place. 1.00
00:48:45.000 This dude is out there.
00:48:46.000 Dirt roads for six hours. 1.00
00:48:48.000 He gets in a fucking gunfight at a gas station. 1.00
00:48:51.000 At a gas station. 1.00
00:48:53.000 There were some rebels who disagreed with something and they shot at the guy who was driving the car.
00:48:59.000 It's so primitive.
00:49:01.000 We went to a little town.
00:49:04.000 And you come into this town, it's just like steel siding put up and chickens running around.
00:49:12.000 I mean, it's not a town.
00:49:14.000 It's what you picture in your head of a crazy African bazaar. 1.00
00:49:19.000 And there's guys on motorcycles up and down the street.
00:49:23.000 Wow.
00:49:24.000 You don't know...
00:49:25.000 I don't know how this is gonna go.
00:49:27.000 This is...
00:49:27.000 You know what I mean?
00:49:28.000 This is...
00:49:28.000 Most of the time, in those parts of the world, everything goes fine.
00:49:32.000 And that's...
00:49:33.000 Right.
00:49:33.000 But there's a high percentage of the time in those places, as opposed to in America, where things don't go well.
00:49:38.000 It's like when they don't go well, they unravel really quickly and it can just not come back.
00:49:43.000 And then people eat you.
00:49:43.000 Stuff happens here, the cops show up, and they will get control of it eventually.
00:49:48.000 Unless you're black. 1.00
00:49:49.000 Right. 1.00
00:49:49.000 And the cops just shoot you. 1.00
00:49:50.000 Right. 0.94
00:49:51.000 Yet, again, getting control.
00:49:54.000 Cops are listening right now. 1.00
00:49:55.000 Fuck you, man. 1.00
00:49:56.000 But you go into those towns... 1.00
00:49:58.000 I feel like, you know, I want to be the photojournalist who, like, comes in and just is cool with people and presumes these people are kind and they're gentle.
00:50:07.000 And a lot of them are kind and gentle.
00:50:08.000 Do you have a scarf?
00:50:09.000 I could get one.
00:50:11.000 You need, like, some sort of a knit scarf.
00:50:13.000 Like a scarf?
00:50:14.000 Like, really thin, like, almost, like, transparent.
00:50:16.000 You know one of those, like, really well-worn scarves?
00:50:19.000 And the, like, uh, the mirrored sunglasses, the wire mirrored sunglasses. 0.99
00:50:23.000 That's fucking, that's kind of a douche move. 0.98
00:50:25.000 The scarf's not. 1.00
00:50:27.000 Well...
00:50:28.000 The scarf makes you look worldly, like we were talking before the podcast started about those leather bags that you put your laptop in, that are made out of thick saddle leather that develops a fine patina over time. 0.99
00:50:40.000 Meanwhile, it weighs 20 fucking pounds. 1.00
00:50:43.000 Goddamn piece of shit, it weighs 20 pounds. 1.00
00:50:45.000 You know what's the best thing for carrying your laptop? 1.00
00:50:48.000 It's a backpack.
00:50:49.000 Yeah.
00:50:49.000 Everybody knows it.
00:50:50.000 It's nice, soft.
00:50:51.000 It doesn't look cool.
00:50:52.000 No, it doesn't look like Clint Eastwood would have it.
00:50:54.000 Yeah, if you have a shoulder strap and it's patina leather.
00:50:57.000 Yeah, you can smell the leather on you.
00:50:59.000 Yes, yes, yes.
00:51:00.000 Sophisticated.
00:51:01.000 Look at his shoes.
00:51:02.000 They're suede with a thin bottom.
00:51:05.000 It has a heel, but it's a very small heel.
00:51:09.000 It's a very thin, nondescript suede shoe he's wearing.
00:51:12.000 It's gray, of course.
00:51:13.000 I bet he rolls his own cigarettes.
00:51:15.000 He does roll his own cigarettes.
00:51:17.000 You're amazing.
00:51:17.000 And he does it well.
00:51:18.000 A man who can roll his own cigarettes quickly and very... 1.00
00:51:22.000 Look at that.
00:51:23.000 It looks professional.
00:51:24.000 It looks like a machine did it.
00:51:26.000 Oh, that guy?
00:51:26.000 Yeah, I saw him reciting poetry to that girl before.
00:51:29.000 That guy was embedded with a tribe of cannibals for a year and didn't even speak their language.
00:51:35.000 He's amazing.
00:51:36.000 But I do feel that it's my American paranoia is part of it and that I want to be a better person and assume that these gentle people raising cattle are kind. 0.98
00:51:48.000 Or you should just assume that all that shit you read every 20 minutes when you get up in the morning in the New York Times about people eating people over there is true. 0.99
00:51:56.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00
00:51:58.000 Fucking white liberals. 1.00
00:51:59.000 They're all, we just want to think the world is amazing and diversity is awesome. 1.00
00:52:04.000 I feel like...
00:52:06.000 I felt...
00:52:07.000 I did have a conflicting thing like that.
00:52:09.000 You got lucky and they had already eaten something right before you got there. 1.00
00:52:17.000 People in Africa right now are like, fuck you! 1.00
00:52:19.000 We don't eat people! 1.00
00:52:21.000 I get it!
00:52:22.000 I get it!
00:52:23.000 I'm joking around, folks!
00:52:25.000 But that is how I was acting.
00:52:28.000 I wanted to be like, it's all cool, but I was not.
00:52:32.000 I was keeping my daughters by me.
00:52:33.000 I was like, let's go.
00:52:34.000 This little girl came up, will you give me some juice? 1.00
00:52:37.000 I'm like, screw you! 1.00
00:52:39.000 Get in the van! 0.99
00:52:39.000 Let's get out of here. 0.99
00:52:41.000 We got our fabric that we wanted.
00:52:43.000 Let's leave.
00:52:44.000 I really, I was that way.
00:52:46.000 I was like, I'm not having it.
00:52:47.000 I'm not cool.
00:52:48.000 I'm paranoid.
00:52:50.000 And I'm territorial.
00:52:51.000 And let's get back to the van.
00:52:54.000 I got a buddy of mine who's had malaria three times?
00:52:58.000 Three times?
00:52:59.000 Yeah.
00:52:59.000 And he goes to the Congo for months at a time and builds wells for the pygmies in the Congo.
00:53:06.000 Oh my god.
00:53:07.000 He's the salt of the earth.
00:53:08.000 His name's Justin Wren.
00:53:09.000 He actually met him when he was fighting for the UFC. Wow.
00:53:13.000 And he took a long time off of fighting.
00:53:15.000 He recently returned to bring awareness to the pygmies. 0.98
00:53:20.000 Oh really?
00:53:20.000 He just loves pygmies.
00:53:21.000 To help gather money to build them wells.
00:53:25.000 And they've built, I think, 42 wells so far.
00:53:28.000 Wow.
00:53:29.000 It's amazing.
00:53:30.000 It's amazing.
00:53:31.000 Works with this company called Water4, and you can donate.
00:53:34.000 He's got a website called fightfortheforgotten.com.
00:53:37.000 That's him.
00:53:38.000 That's my friend.
00:53:39.000 But he goes down there for months and months at a time and lives with these people.
00:53:45.000 He looks happy.
00:53:46.000 He's the happiest guy ever.
00:53:47.000 He looks so happy.
00:53:48.000 He's so fucking nice, man. 0.95
00:53:50.000 I would feel great, too, if I went to a land of pygmies, and I was just like, I am your god. 0.99
00:53:55.000 I am big, and I can dig.
00:53:57.000 Did you say guide or god?
00:53:58.000 God.
00:53:58.000 Yeah, but this...
00:54:00.000 They're little, right, pygmies? 1.00
00:54:02.000 They just call them the big pygmy.
00:54:03.000 Yeah.
00:54:04.000 He looks like the gnome on my leg.
00:54:06.000 He's a big guy.
00:54:07.000 He's a UFC heavyweight.
00:54:08.000 So he's 250 plus pounds.
00:54:10.000 Wow.
00:54:10.000 He's a big dude.
00:54:11.000 Big boulder of a man.
00:54:13.000 He looks like one of my tattoos.
00:54:17.000 He really does.
00:54:18.000 I think he might be over there now.
00:54:20.000 If he's not there now, he's going back soon.
00:54:23.000 He goes there all the time.
00:54:25.000 He's an amazing guy.
00:54:26.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:54:26.000 But that guy's had malaria three fucking times. 0.99
00:54:29.000 And he said there's types of malaria... 0.99
00:54:30.000 Bad, right?
00:54:30.000 Yeah.
00:54:31.000 Well, he said there's types of malaria that you can get that can last years.
00:54:34.000 What did he say? 0.99
00:54:35.000 Like 30 fucking years? 0.99
00:54:36.000 Oh my god. 0.99
00:54:37.000 One of them was like five months, one of them was ten years, and there's a type that lasts for like 30 years.
00:54:42.000 He just didn't want to take medication?
00:54:44.000 Well, he did.
00:54:45.000 And he still got it?
00:54:46.000 He didn't take medication for some of them.
00:54:47.000 He did for other ones.
00:54:48.000 There's other people that he knows that took medication and still got malaria.
00:54:52.000 Right. 0.99
00:54:52.000 But he's in the fucking heat of it, man. 0.99
00:54:55.000 No, that's... 0.99
00:54:55.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:54:55.000 He's in the Congo. 0.99
00:54:57.000 Deep.
00:54:57.000 The Congo.
00:54:58.000 Yeah.
00:54:58.000 Do you know that malaria has killed half the people that have ever died ever?
00:55:03.000 Really?
00:55:04.000 Yeah.
00:55:04.000 Yeah.
00:55:05.000 Out of all the things that have killed people and all the history...
00:55:07.000 Malaria's the biggest? 1.00
00:55:08.000 Wolves and fucking earthquakes... 1.00
00:55:11.000 Dragons... 1.00
00:55:11.000 Drowning. 1.00
00:55:13.000 Malaria.
00:55:13.000 Half of them.
00:55:14.000 Half of them died because of malaria.
00:55:17.000 That's not going to last, though.
00:55:18.000 Because we're able to go in and affect mosquitoes, and the mosquitoes are going to go and take all that out. 0.87
00:55:24.000 Have you seen that?
00:55:24.000 Yeah.
00:55:25.000 Genetically modified mosquitoes.
00:55:27.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:55:27.000 Where are you now, you GMO pussies? 1.00
00:55:30.000 Yeah, bring it. 1.00
00:55:30.000 All those people are scared of GMO. What we have is everything is non-GMO. It's super important to me to be clean, to eat clean. 1.00
00:55:39.000 Right. 1.00
00:55:40.000 Smoking cigarettes, taking ass on the side, you fucking dirty hippie. 1.00
00:55:44.000 Dirty! 1.00
00:55:45.000 Yeah. 0.75
00:55:46.000 GMOs.
00:55:47.000 GMOs have been with us forever. 0.98
00:55:52.000 Here's what's not a good idea.
00:55:53.000 It's not a good idea to put pesticides on your food.
00:55:57.000 You know it and I knew it.
00:55:58.000 And the problem with things like GMO, like Roundup, everybody knows that Roundup was created so they could spray it with evil chemicals because it makes it easier to grow plants.
00:56:08.000 Right.
00:56:09.000 It's not how it's supposed to be done. 1.00
00:56:11.000 These shortcuts that people have created for industrialized farming to kill off weeds and things like that, pesticides, that shit is fucking terrible for you. 0.99
00:56:21.000 And it gets in the water, and that stuff gets in the water. 0.99
00:56:23.000 I know a dude who has bone cancer.
00:56:25.000 And he has bone cancer, and a bunch of people in his neighborhood have cancer. 0.98
00:56:28.000 And they all got cancer because they were near a fucking golf course, and they had wells. 0.98
00:56:32.000 And so they were down... 0.99
00:56:34.000 Down water from the golf course, and the golf course constantly sprayed pesticide all over the grass.
00:56:39.000 They wanted to keep that grass clean.
00:56:40.000 It seeped into the groundwater.
00:56:43.000 These people all drank that groundwater, and they got cancer. 0.80
00:56:46.000 A fuckload of people in this guy's neighborhood got cancer. 0.98
00:56:50.000 Instead of a thigh, his femur is a rod. 0.99
00:56:54.000 It's like a metal rod.
00:56:56.000 And they rebuilt his leg, because they had to cut his femur out.
00:57:00.000 Easy to do that or remove your leg.
00:57:02.000 You want to try a rod?
00:57:02.000 Yeah, let's go with the rod.
00:57:04.000 Now he has a fucking rod in his leg. 1.00
00:57:06.000 Oh my god. 1.00
00:57:07.000 GMO mosquitoes.
00:57:08.000 But here's the thing.
00:57:10.000 That's terrible, right?
00:57:11.000 But genetically modified foods, the more I've looked into it, the more I understand it now.
00:57:17.000 First of all, they've been with us forever. 0.96
00:57:20.000 Everything you fucking eat, from oranges to corn to tomatoes, all those things have been genetically modified. 0.98
00:57:27.000 Most of those things have been genetically modified by traditional methods. 0.99
00:57:48.000 Mm-hmm.
00:57:49.000 Natural of selection and selecting the type of traits and foods that they want and taking seeds and figuring out.
00:57:57.000 That's the other thing that I didn't know.
00:57:58.000 Most of the foods that you buy, the seeds aren't going to even work on them.
00:58:02.000 If you buy tomatoes, those tomatoes, they're probably not even going to grow tomatoes from the seeds in those plants.
00:58:10.000 The thing that freaks me, you hear GMO and you just think, okay, someone big is messing with our food and then there's a smaller number of big people who are manipulating the food supply.
00:58:25.000 And they don't care about you.
00:58:26.000 And they don't even allow those old ways of modifying stuff because they're taking seeds out away from regular farmers.
00:58:34.000 I mean, it's really that part...
00:58:37.000 It's like the big brother part of the food industry that really is scary.
00:58:42.000 And when I hear GMO, I just think, okay, who's doing what?
00:58:45.000 On what level?
00:58:46.000 I think the same way when we were talking about how many employees do you have to have before you have to hire a chick. 0.91
00:58:52.000 You're okay if you have two.
00:58:54.000 I think when you're a part of a big corporation, how many people do you have to have where no one feels responsible for the consequences of the actions of the company? 0.84
00:59:05.000 Like, if you're working for Monsanto, you're working for a fucking enormous monster of a machine that needs to make more money every month than the previous month. 0.90
00:59:14.000 It's bigger than a lot of countries. 0.97
00:59:16.000 It's bigger than a lot of countries, and the amount of money that it generates is substantial worldwide.
00:59:22.000 And then, here's the thing.
00:59:25.000 We're infinite growth, which is this thing that a lot of corporations operate under.
00:59:30.000 They have stockholders.
00:59:31.000 People want returns on their investments.
00:59:34.000 You want to make more money every quarter than you did the previous quarter.
00:59:38.000 That's crazy.
00:59:39.000 Insane.
00:59:40.000 You can't sustain that.
00:59:41.000 It just keeps going and going and going.
00:59:42.000 And when you're a company like Monsanto, I'm not making any excuses for them.
00:59:46.000 I'm just saying the way giant corporations operate, the CEO has...
00:59:54.000 He has an obligation to his stockholders to generate more income.
00:59:58.000 It's important that he make their...
01:00:00.000 And if they don't, they'll write him out.
01:00:01.000 They'll get a new guy in here who's going to do the job. 0.98
01:00:03.000 So if you take on the job of a CEO of a major corporation, your job is to make more fucking money every time. 0.90
01:00:10.000 And it's a very high-pressure job, which is why it's worth so much money. 0.96
01:00:13.000 Right. 0.95
01:00:14.000 They're not stupid. 0.99
01:00:15.000 No, you get it. 1.00
01:00:15.000 No, you get it. 1.00
01:00:16.000 But that's why...
01:00:18.000 You need someone like the FDA to keep an eye on it and keep them small and break them up, make sure they're not putting that stuff in the wells and doing all that stuff.
01:00:27.000 But they're all bought and paid.
01:00:28.000 Yeah, but if the corporation's goal is to just get bigger and make more, they're not going to put the brakes on and say, let's not put the bad water in the well.
01:00:39.000 That's true.
01:00:39.000 Somebody has to do it.
01:00:40.000 Somebody's going to do it.
01:00:41.000 Right?
01:00:42.000 It's not perfect.
01:00:43.000 The government is far from doing it right.
01:00:45.000 But the FDA with food, they let so much stuff slide.
01:00:48.000 There's so much stuff in our food that isn't allowed in Europe.
01:00:52.000 Yeah, well, that's what I'm saying.
01:00:53.000 Like, they're bought and sold.
01:00:54.000 Like, if they were looking out for us, the first thing they would do is look into cigarettes.
01:00:58.000 There would be, like, some major investigation as to why politicians haven't spoken out against cigarettes, why cigarettes are killing 500,000 people and no one's doing anything to stop it.
01:01:07.000 That would be one of the first things they would do.
01:01:09.000 And it's allowed to exist at all.
01:01:11.000 Yeah, if you had a new product, like cigarettes, it was killing a half million people a year, and it wasn't doing anything good.
01:01:17.000 Yeah. 0.98
01:01:18.000 How the fuck is that going to stick around? 0.99
01:01:19.000 Right, you make a bubble gum that's killing half the people. 0.99
01:01:22.000 Well, here's what it does do.
01:01:24.000 It makes you need that gum.
01:01:25.000 Yeah.
01:01:26.000 And then you want to get that gum back.
01:01:27.000 Anybody who created that gum would be thought of as a monster.
01:01:30.000 Total monster.
01:01:31.000 But you could be like, what does your dad do?
01:01:33.000 Oh, well, he runs a tobacco company.
01:01:35.000 Oh, cool.
01:01:35.000 Oh, cool.
01:01:36.000 Yeah.
01:01:36.000 Yeah.
01:01:37.000 So does the rest of this state.
01:01:38.000 Everybody in North Carolina.
01:01:41.000 He employs a lot of people in this state.
01:01:43.000 Oh, excellent.
01:01:44.000 What does your dad do?
01:01:45.000 Oh, he makes this addictive gum that kills you. 1.00
01:01:48.000 What a piece of shit. 1.00
01:01:51.000 That's a piece of shit. 1.00
01:01:52.000 Oh yeah, he wears a cape and he lives in a dark castle and it's never sunny. 1.00
01:01:56.000 It's weird.
01:01:57.000 He just mysteriously goes around the basement and thinks about killing people.
01:02:02.000 He's so happy with his product, killing half a million a year.
01:02:04.000 And he has all the money in the world.
01:02:06.000 He buys off politicians.
01:02:07.000 Yeah.
01:02:08.000 With his evil gum money.
01:02:10.000 I mean, that's what they're doing.
01:02:11.000 Yeah, exactly.
01:02:12.000 Exactly.
01:02:13.000 So much difference.
01:02:13.000 That's, you know what I think?
01:02:14.000 I was trying to think of why, like, your buddy goes and helps the pygmies, and all these people are like, you've got to just go into these places and help these people.
01:02:21.000 And part of me was, when I was there, was thinking, it's almost, like, in this liberal, arrogant way, offensive to be like, I'm here now.
01:02:33.000 I can help you.
01:02:34.000 You live like this?
01:02:36.000 Let me make it better.
01:02:39.000 But as I was thinking about it, I think the desire to go to work with the pygmies and to go to help these people with their water and all, it's not that we think we're better.
01:02:47.000 You just see people that need help.
01:02:50.000 But unlike here in this country, you see people that need help, it's a mess to be able to help them.
01:02:56.000 You don't know if you're really...
01:02:57.000 There, it's like, I build a well, and these people are happy, right?
01:03:00.000 I give them education, and it's a clear path.
01:03:04.000 There is no...
01:03:06.000 I know I'm going against what I was saying before, but there is no government regulations.
01:03:10.000 There's no complex corporations.
01:03:12.000 If I want to help somebody here, it's like, how do you help people in Detroit?
01:03:15.000 Where do you start?
01:03:16.000 How does it make an impact there?
01:03:18.000 He goes and sees pygmies.
01:03:19.000 He helps the pygmies. 1.00
01:03:21.000 And at the end of the day, he's helped pygmies. 1.00
01:03:22.000 Right?
01:03:23.000 You know what I mean?
01:03:23.000 There's a direct way to help people there.
01:03:26.000 There is that thing, though, whenever you do something charitable, that people think that you're, like, peacocking your charitable ways.
01:03:33.000 You're doing it for yourself and your own ego.
01:03:36.000 Yeah.
01:03:36.000 But then there's the other side of looking at, like, who cares as long as the good work gets done?
01:03:40.000 Like, even if you have kind of shitty, selfish, ambitious, sort of weird intentions behind it. 0.84
01:03:47.000 Yeah. 0.77
01:03:47.000 If I do something good for people, I want other people to know I did it. 0.77
01:03:52.000 I'll admit it.
01:03:53.000 I know it's a shitty motivation, but I did help somebody.
01:04:00.000 You know what I mean?
01:04:01.000 They got something out of it, for sure.
01:04:03.000 I got something out of it, for sure.
01:04:05.000 Praise me.
01:04:06.000 Praise Tom Papa.
01:04:08.000 I'm a pretty good guy.
01:04:09.000 Look what I did.
01:04:11.000 Look what I did.
01:04:12.000 You know what I mean?
01:04:13.000 I really...
01:04:13.000 I'll admit it.
01:04:15.000 If I went back to Africa and helped these people out with their drinking water...
01:04:20.000 You'd want to do a documentary on it, make some cash.
01:04:23.000 Oh, yeah.
01:04:23.000 I'd do a special in Kilimanjaro on my way home, and I would market it.
01:04:28.000 What kind of comedy would you do in Kilimanjaro?
01:04:30.000 Oh, man.
01:04:31.000 What about these rebels, folks?
01:04:32.000 Who's dressing them?
01:04:35.000 No, it's safe in Tanzania.
01:04:37.000 There's no conflicts.
01:04:38.000 There's no rebels.
01:04:40.000 It's nice and peaceful.
01:04:41.000 These people are kind.
01:04:43.000 They're nice.
01:04:44.000 They're good.
01:04:45.000 Kilimanjaro's like that?
01:04:46.000 Mm-hmm.
01:04:47.000 What would you do?
01:04:48.000 What kind of jokes would you do when you're in Kilimanjaro?
01:04:51.000 They don't understand English very well, so you have to get a little physical.
01:04:58.000 Do some act-outs.
01:05:01.000 Do the old grandpa.
01:05:03.000 Yeah, grandpa running from the lion gag.
01:05:05.000 A couple boob jokes.
01:05:12.000 That sounds good.
01:05:14.000 I saw The Lion King.
01:05:15.000 Not The Lion King.
01:05:16.000 Jungle Book last night.
01:05:17.000 Yeah, I saw it on the plane.
01:05:19.000 Spoiler alert, all the animals can talk and the kid lives.
01:05:24.000 I wanted to like it.
01:05:26.000 It just took itself, as soon as I heard Liam Neeson in the beginning taking themselves too seriously, I was out.
01:05:31.000 Well, and also they had a gigantopithecus in it, which I thought was fascinating, but they made it an orangutan.
01:05:37.000 They decided that a gigantopithecus was an orangutan.
01:05:41.000 That bothered me too.
01:05:42.000 It was an enormous orangutan that knocked over a building.
01:05:45.000 It was this 10 foot tall orangutan that can talk.
01:05:48.000 Spoiler alert!
01:05:49.000 Sorry!
01:05:50.000 Is it bad that I still want to say orangutan because it sounds more fun?
01:05:53.000 Yes.
01:05:54.000 You're saying it wrong.
01:05:56.000 It's Neanderthal also, by the way.
01:05:59.000 It's not Thal. 0.98
01:06:00.000 It's Neanderthal. 0.91
01:06:02.000 Some of the oldest human remains were Tanzania.
01:06:06.000 Really?
01:06:06.000 Yeah.
01:06:07.000 How old were they?
01:06:08.000 I don't know.
01:06:09.000 Well, they think that's where people evolved, if you believe all that evolution nonsense and not the Bible.
01:06:15.000 I do.
01:06:16.000 I do believe it.
01:06:17.000 Hmm.
01:06:17.000 I pity you.
01:06:18.000 I pity your soul, because you're going to burn in a fiery pit. 0.99
01:06:22.000 Whoops! 0.99
01:06:23.000 I pity your Twitter. 1.00
01:06:24.000 I guess you fucked up. 1.00
01:06:27.000 Yeah, they think that's where people evolved, right? 1.00
01:06:30.000 Yeah.
01:06:30.000 Or one of the main places.
01:06:32.000 Yeah.
01:06:32.000 I think the original place for human beings.
01:06:34.000 Ethiopia?
01:06:35.000 And then, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:06:36.000 And then, obviously, they branched out and different species of human, different branches of human evolved.
01:06:42.000 Yeah.
01:06:42.000 They keep finding, over the last few years, a bunch of new ones.
01:06:45.000 I know.
01:06:46.000 These new branches. 1.00
01:06:47.000 Yeah, they find like some teeth and they go, what the fuck is this? 0.99
01:06:50.000 And then they go, I think we got a new jawbone here, guys. 0.99
01:06:53.000 Right. 0.99
01:06:54.000 And then they do some DNA on it and like, holy fuckstick. 0.99
01:06:57.000 Did humans have tails? 0.99
01:06:58.000 Maybe.
01:07:00.000 Olduvai Gorge in Tanzania.
01:07:02.000 Yeah.
01:07:04.000 The site in Tanzania that holds the earliest evidence of the existence of human ancestors.
01:07:08.000 You gotta go, Joe.
01:07:09.000 You gotta go.
01:07:10.000 You would love it. 1.00
01:07:11.000 Holy shit, look at that. 0.99
01:07:12.000 They found hundreds of fossilized bones and stone tools in the area dating back millions of years, leading them to conclude that humans evolved in Africa. 0.99
01:07:21.000 Wow, millions of years.
01:07:22.000 Millions.
01:07:23.000 I didn't know they had stone tools millions of years ago.
01:07:25.000 Millions.
01:07:26.000 I wonder if they're saying fossilized bones...
01:07:29.000 And stone tools also millions?
01:07:31.000 Like, how old was the oldest, if you had a guess, right now, without any looking, how old do you think the oldest stone tool ever found was?
01:07:38.000 The oldest stone tool was discovered by Benjamin Franklin in Philadelphia.
01:07:46.000 You're talking about his wife?
01:07:48.000 His beard, his old tool. 1.00
01:07:51.000 That's what he called his dick, my stone tool. 1.00
01:07:55.000 I'm very bad with thinking about numbers like back into the past and things out into the universe. 0.99
01:08:02.000 Like these billions don't make any sense to me.
01:08:04.000 But I would guess, in my dumb way, I would say a tool would be about two million years old.
01:08:14.000 Yeah, I'm going to go with you.
01:08:15.000 I'll say about 2 million years.
01:08:17.000 Oh, I'm impressed.
01:08:18.000 Let's see.
01:08:19.000 2.8 million.
01:08:20.000 Whoa! 0.71
01:08:21.000 Wow! 1.00
01:08:21.000 Holy shit. 1.00
01:08:22.000 That's a long time. 1.00
01:08:23.000 That's so long.
01:08:24.000 The artifacts are by far the oldest handmade stone tools yet discovered.
01:08:27.000 The previous record holders known as the Older Wand stone tools were about 2.6 million years old.
01:08:33.000 So, I was hunting recently in Nevada.
01:08:36.000 You've got to go to Africa. 1.00
01:08:37.000 You're built for this.
01:08:39.000 I was in Nevada, though.
01:08:40.000 I was in the mountains, in the high country, the high country desert, hunting mule deer, doing this archery hunt, hiking, backpacking, camping out there.
01:08:48.000 And I found a stone arrowhead.
01:08:53.000 You did?
01:08:54.000 Yeah.
01:08:54.000 While hunting, I found an ancient arrowhead.
01:08:57.000 That's the coolest! 0.99
01:08:59.000 It was the coolest shit ever. 0.99
01:09:00.000 That's the coolest! 0.99
01:09:00.000 Who knows how old it was. 0.99
01:09:02.000 Did you keep it?
01:09:03.000 Well, you're not supposed to.
01:09:04.000 You're not?
01:09:04.000 Yeah.
01:09:05.000 Of course I did.
01:09:06.000 You're not supposed to walk out with it? 0.99
01:09:07.000 I'm gonna fucking leave it there. 1.00
01:09:08.000 Get the fuck out of here. 1.00
01:09:09.000 Fuck off. 1.00
01:09:10.000 How big was it? 1.00
01:09:11.000 Tiny.
01:09:12.000 Small.
01:09:13.000 About that big.
01:09:13.000 It's amazing.
01:09:14.000 I've always wanted to find that.
01:09:15.000 I left it there.
01:09:16.000 I buried it, Tom.
01:09:17.000 I buried it so that someone else could find it.
01:09:19.000 You're a good man.
01:09:20.000 I am a good man.
01:09:21.000 I want everybody to know I buried it too.
01:09:22.000 Say you would.
01:09:23.000 You would want everyone to know.
01:09:26.000 If I got a deer there, I was going to take a photo of the new arrowhead next to the old arrowhead.
01:09:32.000 Not take a photo of them, but glue them onto a piece with a photo of the animal and then have it framed.
01:09:38.000 I just think it's a dope thing to find.
01:09:40.000 While you're out bow and arrow hunting, you find an arrowhead from...
01:09:44.000 Probably Indians. 0.98
01:09:45.000 Yeah, I'm sure.
01:09:46.000 Native Americans or indigenous people, I prefer.
01:09:48.000 I mean, engines.
01:09:51.000 I mean, Redskins.
01:09:54.000 You know, that kind.
01:09:56.000 Powwow.
01:09:57.000 Eagles.
01:09:57.000 Eagle feathers.
01:09:58.000 You know, them dudes.
01:10:00.000 You know, whenever I say Indians, my daughter always goes, Dad.
01:10:03.000 Yeah, don't say that.
01:10:04.000 Native American.
01:10:05.000 And I'm like, ah, okay.
01:10:07.000 But then I was reading an article in the New York Times about, you know, they're trying to put the pipeline through North Dakota, and they call them the Lakota Indians.
01:10:15.000 They don't say the Lakota Native Americans, so I'm not being offensive.
01:10:19.000 The Lakota people, I think, is what they're supposed to be calling themselves.
01:10:22.000 I think they called them Indians in the article.
01:10:24.000 Do you know that other Indians called them the Sioux?
01:10:26.000 Oh, yeah.
01:10:27.000 Because Sioux means enemy. 0.99
01:10:29.000 Oh.
01:10:30.000 Yeah.
01:10:30.000 The Lakota people were a notorious warlike people.
01:10:34.000 Right.
01:10:34.000 Yeah.
01:10:35.000 Tough.
01:10:35.000 Do you ever hear of the Nez Perce?
01:10:37.000 No.
01:10:38.000 Big time cannibals. 0.71
01:10:39.000 Oh, yeah.
01:10:40.000 Along the Great Lakes areas. 0.99
01:10:41.000 Yeah, they did a lot of killing and eating white folks. 1.00
01:10:46.000 They didn't like the white invaders, so they took to killing them and eating them. 1.00
01:10:50.000 And take their soul. 1.00
01:10:51.000 Oh, here's something I found out that's very important. 1.00
01:10:53.000 The Revenant's all based on bullshit. 0.99
01:10:55.000 No, it's not! 1.00
01:10:56.000 Fucking bullshit. 1.00
01:10:57.000 I just read the book! 1.00
01:10:58.000 Here's what actually happened to that guy.
01:11:00.000 No, no, no, no, no.
01:11:00.000 I just read the book.
01:11:01.000 The historical account of the actual event.
01:11:03.000 Oh, okay. 0.99
01:11:04.000 Here's a bunch of shit that never happened. 0.99
01:11:06.000 That's true. 1.00
01:11:06.000 First of all, he never had a son. 1.00
01:11:09.000 Spoiler alert!
01:11:10.000 His son's murdered by the guy, and he wants to go after the guy.
01:11:12.000 Never had a son.
01:11:13.000 That's not in the book, by the way.
01:11:15.000 Second of all, they never tried to bury him alive. 0.99
01:11:18.000 He was fucked up. 1.00
01:11:20.000 He got mauled by a bear, and they left him to die. 1.00
01:11:22.000 They thought he was going to die.
01:11:23.000 They didn't bury him.
01:11:23.000 They didn't bury him.
01:11:24.000 The guy crawled back.
01:11:25.000 That's not in the book either.
01:11:26.000 He never killed anybody.
01:11:27.000 He didn't kill anybody, that guy.
01:11:29.000 Never.
01:11:29.000 Didn't kill anybody.
01:11:30.000 Made it back to camp.
01:11:31.000 Crawled back to camp, got pissed, and they were like, oh, sorry.
01:11:34.000 Yeah, it just ended.
01:11:35.000 Yeah.
01:11:35.000 He never killed him.
01:11:36.000 I know.
01:11:37.000 That's not in the book either.
01:11:38.000 The guy who left him to die wound up dying too.
01:11:41.000 They all die real young back then.
01:11:42.000 Yeah.
01:11:43.000 But the only thing that was true is he survived.
01:11:45.000 He found an animal.
01:11:46.000 I think it was a moose or an elk that had been killed by wolves and he ate some of that.
01:11:51.000 And he killed and ate a snake.
01:11:52.000 And that's all he had to eat his entire way back. 0.99
01:11:54.000 And his body's all fucked up. 1.00
01:11:56.000 And he did crawl his way back to wherever the fuck he was. 1.00
01:11:58.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:11:59.000 He actually...
01:12:00.000 Yeah, and then he got a horse.
01:12:02.000 He got a horse from Indian and rode it to a fort. 1.00
01:12:05.000 Yeah.
01:12:06.000 And then it just kind of ends.
01:12:07.000 And now he fell off the cliff and landed in the tree. 1.00
01:12:10.000 Bullshit. 1.00
01:12:11.000 Never happened. 1.00
01:12:12.000 Made up.
01:12:12.000 The book is pretty accurate to the real account.
01:12:14.000 Oh, yeah?
01:12:15.000 And my buddy told me to read it, so...
01:12:18.000 Putting together a little summer reading list, I threw that into the pile.
01:12:21.000 I hate that phrase, pretty accurate. 1.00
01:12:24.000 You're talking about historical events. 0.98
01:12:26.000 You have an obligation to have zero bullshit that you add in there to make the story better. 0.93
01:12:30.000 But I think the book is. 0.97
01:12:32.000 I couldn't tell you 100%.
01:12:33.000 But all that stuff, like...
01:12:35.000 As I was reading it, it's a really good book because it really gets into the smallness of what you have in your utility bag and walking through and what this Indian would do. 1.00
01:12:45.000 There's all this very little subtle day-to-day stuff that makes the book great.
01:12:49.000 Um...
01:12:51.000 But it just, yeah, it just kind of like drifted off and ended.
01:12:54.000 There was a lot less drama.
01:12:56.000 The book was pretty dry.
01:12:58.000 Yeah, well that's the real life story.
01:12:59.000 Right.
01:13:00.000 No, so this, the account of all the stuff that they carried with them, you mean like flints to start fires and things like that?
01:13:06.000 Yeah, exactly.
01:13:07.000 The flint.
01:13:08.000 What did they carry with them?
01:13:09.000 A little rope, a little fat.
01:13:12.000 Fat?
01:13:12.000 Why fat?
01:13:13.000 Yeah, a little fat.
01:13:14.000 I don't know how to oil up their tools.
01:13:17.000 Huh.
01:13:17.000 Oh, to make sure that their tools didn't get rusty, probably.
01:13:19.000 A lot of stuff for their gun, for their gun maintenance.
01:13:22.000 Yeah.
01:13:23.000 What'd they call it?
01:13:24.000 A supplies bag?
01:13:26.000 It was a cooler name than that.
01:13:28.000 And so they had muskets back then, right?
01:13:30.000 So they would have like black powder and they would pour it into the barrel.
01:13:33.000 Then they would have to pack it down and put a primer in.
01:13:36.000 And they had a little piece of flint that would drop down on a hammer and the spark from that would cause the explosion.
01:13:43.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:13:43.000 So fucking primitive. 0.99
01:13:44.000 It's amazing. 0.99
01:13:45.000 Amazing.
01:13:46.000 Amazing.
01:13:47.000 It really is.
01:13:48.000 It's amazing how people not just got by back then, but actually would go out into the woods, like barely supplied.
01:13:59.000 Nothing.
01:13:59.000 Almost nothing.
01:14:00.000 Just against the weather?
01:14:01.000 Yeah.
01:14:02.000 Not prepared?
01:14:03.000 You have one pair of clothes?
01:14:04.000 I wonder how much food they would bring, and how much they would just rely upon the land.
01:14:08.000 Because they didn't really know what the hell was ahead a lot of the time.
01:14:11.000 They would salt a lot of meat, right?
01:14:13.000 They would salt it and jerk it and, you know, carry that stuff.
01:14:16.000 But, you know, that was like...
01:14:18.000 You ate that when you were in a fix, you know, and you had no food for a while.
01:14:22.000 Yeah.
01:14:22.000 But they didn't...
01:14:23.000 They couldn't carry a lot of stuff.
01:14:24.000 They couldn't refrigerate stuff, you know.
01:14:26.000 You're just living out there.
01:14:28.000 It's wild.
01:14:29.000 Think about how scary it would be just, like, sleeping there and knowing that, you know, Native Americans are coming through the woods... 1.00
01:14:38.000 Well, I got really...
01:14:39.000 Pissed off that you're on their land. 0.66
01:14:40.000 Oh, insane. 0.92
01:14:41.000 You know? 1.00
01:14:42.000 And you really are on their fucking land. 0.99
01:14:44.000 Like, you're really not supposed to be there. 1.00
01:14:45.000 You really are part of an invading army.
01:14:47.000 Yeah.
01:14:48.000 I put this article up yesterday that somebody tweeted, that I retweeted.
01:14:55.000 It was just a shocking article.
01:14:56.000 I started reading it about...
01:14:59.000 All of the Southern California murders that involved Indians, and then California in general. 0.57
01:15:06.000 Like, how many Native Americans were murdered in establishing California in the 1800s?
01:15:12.000 Oh, like when they were pioneering, like when they were first coming.
01:15:14.000 Oh, my God.
01:15:15.000 Oh, dude.
01:15:16.000 But these accounts were horrific.
01:15:18.000 Like, firsthand accounts of thousands of people getting slaughtered, including children, babies, women.
01:15:25.000 This all happened a couple hundred years ago.
01:15:29.000 After reading The Revenant, I decided I was so excited about reading about the West.
01:15:35.000 I'm like, let me learn about how the Indians actually lived.
01:15:39.000 Let me see their small bags.
01:15:40.000 What did they carry?
01:15:41.000 What was their day-to-day?
01:15:42.000 I really wanted to kind of get into that. 1.00
01:15:44.000 So, like an idiot, I pick up Bury Me at Wounded Knee. 0.99
01:15:48.000 Which is the most horrific account of the slaughter of Native Americans. 1.00
01:15:53.000 It's just, you know, tribe after tribe.
01:15:56.000 It just takes you through our expansion and going into each state and lying and destroying and killing men, women and children.
01:16:02.000 It's unreadable.
01:16:04.000 You literally can't get through it.
01:16:05.000 It's so recent.
01:16:06.000 I'm like, I want to read a nice Indian story where a white guy comes out and they know he's cool and he gets a girlfriend and he's like the one cool white guy and hangs with the Indians.
01:16:18.000 I love Indians.
01:16:19.000 Dancing with Wolves is my favorite movie.
01:16:22.000 When the beautiful white man becomes the best Indian, I love it.
01:16:26.000 That's what I want to read. 1.00
01:16:28.000 Fucking horrible movie. 1.00
01:16:30.000 The best of the group who gets the hottest woman is a beautiful white man. 1.00
01:16:35.000 With a ponytail.
01:16:36.000 He starts off slow. 1.00
01:16:37.000 He gets his ass kicked early. 1.00
01:16:38.000 Some of the young guys don't trust him. 1.00
01:16:40.000 Yeah, there's a lot of rivalries.
01:16:43.000 Here's the story arc.
01:16:44.000 It's going to take a long time.
01:16:45.000 We need three plus hours.
01:16:47.000 Three hours? 1.00
01:16:48.000 What kind of fucking movie is this? 1.00
01:16:50.000 Well, he has to win the Indian's Respect. 1.00
01:16:51.000 It's going to take time.
01:16:52.000 It's an amazing movie, and Kevin Costner's on board.
01:16:55.000 So, Kevin believes in this.
01:16:57.000 Sold.
01:16:58.000 First of all, Kevin has been researching this for a long time.
01:17:03.000 It would be within your best interest to make this film, because if you don't, someone will.
01:17:08.000 I'll just tell you that now.
01:17:09.000 We're here out of respect because of our previous relationship that we have with Universal.
01:17:14.000 This is getting made.
01:17:15.000 This is getting made.
01:17:17.000 This is an amazing film.
01:17:20.000 Kevin becomes the best Indian at the end of the movie. 1.00
01:17:23.000 He kicks everyone's ass and fucks everyone's Pocahontas. 1.00
01:17:28.000 Fucks their wives. 1.00
01:17:29.000 And think about all the Indians you're going to employ in this movie. 1.00
01:17:33.000 You won't have to hire black people for the rest of the year.
01:17:35.000 And there was a young man at one point in time in the film who seemed like he and Kevin would be rivals.
01:17:43.000 Eventually he worships Kevin.
01:17:44.000 And he thinks Kevin is amazing.
01:17:47.000 Kevin begins to dress like them.
01:17:48.000 Somehow or another, though, he goes to a barber.
01:17:51.000 And gets his hair cut perfectly around his ears.
01:17:53.000 It's weird.
01:17:54.000 The same way he was in Waterworld.
01:17:56.000 Yeah, I mean, it's sort of mulledy, but whatever's going on at the top, he's obviously got some product in that hair, right?
01:18:04.000 I mean, what's happening there?
01:18:05.000 Big time.
01:18:06.000 Yeah, he's in a hair metal band.
01:18:10.000 Yeah.
01:18:11.000 My favorite is Wyatt Earp.
01:18:12.000 Did you ever see when he played Wyatt Earp?
01:18:14.000 So he played Wyatt Earp, and when Wyatt Earp was young, they just put a wig on a 40-year-old Kevin Costner.
01:18:20.000 They're like, yeah, just make him look like he's 18. Give him a fucking wig. 1.00
01:18:23.000 So he's like, gee, mister, I don't know. 1.00
01:18:25.000 Why'd you beat me up? 0.99
01:18:25.000 This guy beats him up, and he's got this fucking... 0.99
01:18:28.000 He's a 40-year-old guy with a wig on, and no one's freaking out. 0.99
01:18:31.000 Everyone's like, oh, your kid's weird looking. 0.96
01:18:36.000 And then fucking 25 years later, the kid looks exactly the same. 0.98
01:18:40.000 This is so strange. 0.99
01:18:41.000 His voice is a little deeper.
01:18:44.000 But he's got the loose skin thing going on, but he's got a mop of hair. 0.95
01:18:48.000 Just this crazy fat mop. 0.95
01:18:50.000 Nobody cared. 0.97
01:18:51.000 They didn't have CGI back then.
01:18:53.000 Right.
01:18:53.000 You couldn't make him look like an 18 year old.
01:18:55.000 It wasn't 4k.
01:18:56.000 No.
01:18:57.000 No one was really looking that close.
01:18:58.000 It looked so bad.
01:18:59.000 It looked like not even the healthiest 40 year old guy.
01:19:03.000 Like a 40-year-old guy that probably does a little coke every now and then and boozes it up.
01:19:07.000 That's him.
01:19:09.000 Gee, mister.
01:19:10.000 I don't want no trouble.
01:19:11.000 That's him in Wyatt Earp, but that's not him when he was the youngest.
01:19:15.000 That's him in the movie somewhere. 0.99
01:19:17.000 But he had also a lazy bitch. 1.00
01:19:19.000 Didn't even bother losing any weight for that movie. 1.00
01:19:21.000 He had a little bit of a double chin.
01:19:25.000 You're a movie star. 1.00
01:19:26.000 Well, you know, he's like, fuck it. 1.00
01:19:28.000 I'm directing. 1.00
01:19:28.000 I'm acting. 1.00
01:19:29.000 I get tired.
01:19:30.000 I want a snack.
01:19:33.000 I'm dealing with a lot, alright?
01:19:35.000 By the way, I love Kevin Costa. 0.97
01:19:37.000 And Dancing with Wolves is a fucking awesome movie. 0.98
01:19:39.000 I loved it. 0.99
01:19:40.000 But that is what happened.
01:19:42.000 But when you're going in thinking like you're going to get that level of Indian fun, and then you read Bury Me at Wounded Knee, the first chapter alone is like a holocaust. 0.96
01:19:51.000 It's like...
01:19:52.000 It's really rough. 0.97
01:19:53.000 It is incredibly fucked up when you stop and think about the time period of the 1800s and then previous to that, how recent that was. 0.98
01:20:03.000 It's so recent. 1.00
01:20:04.000 It's incredibly fucked up. 1.00
01:20:05.000 It's incredibly fucked up and it's incredible how much has happened up till now. 1.00
01:20:12.000 Like, I mean, walking through this area in like... 0.99
01:20:16.000 In the dark with no lights and it was like being in Africa, right? 1.00
01:20:20.000 And now...
01:20:21.000 They didn't have flashlights.
01:20:22.000 Overnight.
01:20:22.000 These guys camped at night and they didn't have flashlights.
01:20:24.000 Nothing.
01:20:25.000 They couldn't even light a fire because they thought it was going to attract the enemy. 0.75
01:20:29.000 Crazy.
01:20:30.000 Yeah.
01:20:30.000 This is not long ago.
01:20:32.000 Dude.
01:20:33.000 Yeah.
01:20:34.000 Not long ago at all.
01:20:35.000 What people do when they find new spots, it's what they've done throughout history.
01:20:40.000 They find out who's owning those spots, what's all the good stuff in those spots. 0.99
01:20:43.000 All right, we've got to kill those people to get their good stuff. 1.00
01:20:45.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:20:46.000 And then they just jack them.
01:20:47.000 I don't understand why more parts of Africa weren't exploited.
01:20:52.000 It's tough to get to.
01:20:53.000 First of all, it's enormous.
01:20:54.000 If you think about the sheer size of Africa.
01:20:56.000 And then there was also a lot of stuff they tried to exploit.
01:20:59.000 It's one of the famous things about the Congo is that European settlers tried to, they tried to take the Congo and they tried to colonize it.
01:21:07.000 They tried to move in and they tried to gentrify the Congo.
01:21:11.000 They tried to like build houses and there's still the remains of a lot of these incredible mansions.
01:21:17.000 They tried to put like plantations up in the Congo.
01:21:20.000 You go through all of it, it was...
01:21:21.000 Oh, that's when the Germans were here. 1.00
01:21:23.000 That's when the French owned it.
01:21:24.000 That's when the British owned it.
01:21:25.000 I mean, that's the way it was.
01:21:26.000 People just came from Europe and took it over and owned it. 0.93
01:21:30.000 The difference is they didn't come in, in most cases, and slaughter everybody and try and take it over.
01:21:36.000 For some reason, they came in and just tried to adapt those people.
01:21:40.000 But people weren't moving down.
01:21:42.000 It's a hostile environment.
01:21:43.000 And there's, you know, I mean, there's diamonds and there's that stuff.
01:21:47.000 But there's no...
01:21:49.000 There's no real, like, mineable thing that you could exploit and bring to the rest of the world in these areas that I was in.
01:21:56.000 Yeah.
01:21:56.000 There is in some areas, and those areas have deep trouble.
01:21:59.000 Yeah.
01:22:00.000 Like, that's where you get, like, conflict minerals.
01:22:02.000 Uh-huh.
01:22:03.000 You know, a lot of that is they're getting some of these minerals that they need for cell phones and for some different things.
01:22:08.000 Uh-huh.
01:22:08.000 They get a lot of those from Africa.
01:22:10.000 You know who's coming in big in Africa is China. 0.96
01:22:13.000 Oh, yeah.
01:22:13.000 China's going in and building stadiums, building football stadiums, soccer stadiums.
01:22:18.000 Really?
01:22:19.000 Going in and building them for free.
01:22:21.000 And then they get in with the government and they get all these contracts.
01:22:24.000 They see Africa as the place that's going to be exploited in the future. 0.71
01:22:28.000 And China's going in big.
01:22:30.000 Yeah.
01:22:31.000 Yeah, I've heard that.
01:22:32.000 I heard they're buying up enormous swaths of land.
01:22:34.000 Yeah.
01:22:35.000 Yeah, it's kind of weird, man.
01:22:36.000 The thing that China has going on is that they're kind of capitalist now.
01:22:41.000 Yeah.
01:22:41.000 Oh, fiercely.
01:22:42.000 Yeah, but they're also not, in that they can completely control their people, they can shut down aspects of the internet.
01:22:49.000 Like, I had a friend who was an executive at Google, and they were going over there and trying to talk with the Chinese and trying to negotiate to bring Google, but they had, like, some really...
01:22:58.000 Bizarre demands as far as their ability to enact censorship.
01:23:02.000 And then on top of it, they have no laws when it comes to enforcing copyright protection and fraudulent items.
01:23:14.000 They have full Apple stores in China that are all fakes.
01:23:19.000 It's 100% counterfeit.
01:23:20.000 No.
01:23:20.000 Yep.
01:23:21.000 It has a giant Apple logo.
01:23:22.000 You go in there, you buy Apple laptops.
01:23:24.000 They all have the right names.
01:23:26.000 No.
01:23:26.000 They all have the right specifications.
01:23:28.000 All of it's fake.
01:23:29.000 And Apple can't do anything about it? 0.97
01:23:30.000 Can't do a damn thing. 0.99
01:23:32.000 Can't do a damn thing. 0.99
01:23:33.000 There's nothing they can do. 0.99
01:23:34.000 Holy cow. 0.99
01:23:34.000 And the government's not going to do shit either. 0.99
01:23:36.000 That's just what they do. 0.99
01:23:37.000 Wow.
01:23:38.000 Look at this.
01:23:38.000 This is a fake Apple store that's in China.
01:23:42.000 And it looks exactly like an Apple Store.
01:23:45.000 Yeah, that's crazy.
01:23:46.000 It has the same images on the wall.
01:23:48.000 They copy the images.
01:23:49.000 They copy the logo.
01:23:51.000 Now that you know it, it is off just a little bit.
01:23:53.000 Not really.
01:23:54.000 I wouldn't think so.
01:23:55.000 I wouldn't think so at all.
01:23:56.000 Look, dude, it has all the same ads.
01:23:58.000 They steal everything.
01:24:00.000 They steal all the ads.
01:24:02.000 They steal the font.
01:24:03.000 They steal the same sort of tables, the thick, earthy wooden tables that make you feel good when you sit down on them.
01:24:10.000 Those are our children in those heads.
01:24:11.000 But they spelled store wrong.
01:24:12.000 S-T-O-E-R. S-T-O-E-R. It's hard to get away with it. 1.00
01:24:18.000 That's the one thing we do.
01:24:19.000 No, no, no, no.
01:24:20.000 You're an apostol. 0.66
01:24:21.000 We're an apostol.
01:24:22.000 This can't be common, though.
01:24:24.000 Oh, yeah.
01:24:24.000 It's common.
01:24:25.000 It is?
01:24:25.000 Yeah, it is common.
01:24:26.000 Yeah, they just do this constantly.
01:24:28.000 There's a problem with this in the archery world.
01:24:32.000 There's a company called Rage, and they make probably the most popular broadhead for hunting. 0.99
01:24:40.000 It's called a Rage hypodermic.
01:24:41.000 It's a very complicated design because it's what's called a mechanical broadhead.
01:24:46.000 And what this means is with archery, a lot of the accuracy in archery involves drag, like how little drag you have, meaning how much air impacts the arrow, the wind drift, things along those lines.
01:24:59.000 And when you have an arrow that's cutting through the air, it has to be aerodynamic and it has to operate in a specific way.
01:25:07.000 So the most accurate ones are these arrowheads that are called mechanical broadheads.
01:25:12.000 The problem with these things is...
01:25:15.000 They open up on impact.
01:25:17.000 So they hit, and then they open up, and they create this huge wound channel.
01:25:20.000 Wow.
01:25:21.000 So it goes open to, like, two inches.
01:25:22.000 But everything has to be, like, high-quality steel, razor-sharp blades.
01:25:28.000 It has to fit perfectly.
01:25:30.000 The tolerances are incredibly small, because everything has to be...
01:25:33.000 You're talking about, like, to be an ethical hunter, you have to not just be good at it, you have to make an accurate shot, you have to practice, and you have to have the best equipment, right?
01:25:41.000 So this is, like, one of the best pieces of equipment you could buy.
01:25:44.000 If it's real, but the problem is they're making fake ones in China.
01:25:47.000 Oh no.
01:25:48.000 And the blades are dull, and the metal's cheap, and they break off.
01:25:51.000 Are they selling them here?
01:25:52.000 They don't know.
01:25:53.000 People don't know.
01:25:53.000 They don't even know if they're buying them.
01:25:55.000 I mean, you could buy them from a disreputable company that's getting them from China, and they look exactly the same.
01:26:00.000 It has the same logo, the same fonts, and when you buy these things, you're shooting them at an animal.
01:26:06.000 It's entirely likely you're shooting a cheap piece of steel against...
01:26:11.000 China! 0.99
01:26:12.000 And for this company that's put all this money, this company Rage, that's put incredible amounts of money and resources in designing this incredible piece of archery hunting equipment, they're fucking pissed. 0.99
01:26:24.000 Of course. 0.98
01:26:26.000 China's ruthless. 0.97
01:26:28.000 Ruthless like that. 0.96
01:26:29.000 With all that stuff.
01:26:30.000 We're saying it like it's a guy.
01:26:32.000 China's a guy. 0.98
01:26:33.000 She's dead, right?
01:26:34.000 That wrestler?
01:26:35.000 Did she die?
01:26:36.000 She did die.
01:26:36.000 She was nice.
01:26:37.000 She was.
01:26:38.000 The whole poaching problem in Africa?
01:26:40.000 Yeah.
01:26:41.000 China.
01:26:41.000 Yeah.
01:26:42.000 Yeah.
01:26:42.000 Yeah.
01:26:43.000 They don't give a fuck about rhinos. 1.00
01:26:44.000 They want rhino horn. 0.99
01:26:45.000 Yeah.
01:26:46.000 And they'll pay millions of dollars for it. 1.00
01:26:48.000 You ever seen what it does to your dick? 1.00
01:26:50.000 No. 1.00
01:26:50.000 It doesn't do anything. 1.00
01:26:52.000 Just checking to see if you pay attention.
01:26:56.000 It's so funny.
01:26:57.000 Are you really happy for a second?
01:26:58.000 Because they were saying...
01:26:59.000 Because they were talking about how they...
01:27:01.000 It works!
01:27:01.000 In this whole Serengeti area, they have a place just for rhinos.
01:27:05.000 It's the only animal that they've walled off because they were trying to protect it from these poachers.
01:27:09.000 Incredible. 1.00
01:27:09.000 And I was like, the only explanation is it would do something to your dick. 1.00
01:27:14.000 Well, do you see that they've 3D printed fake rhino horns? 1.00
01:27:18.000 Oh, yeah.
01:27:19.000 They've used cellulose and all the different things.
01:27:20.000 I guess it's cellulose, right?
01:27:22.000 Like, what do they use to make them?
01:27:23.000 But they are 3D printing fake rhino horns.
01:27:27.000 Brilliant.
01:27:28.000 That literally, they seem to be rhino horns to collectors, and they're going to flood the market with them.
01:27:33.000 That's great.
01:27:34.000 It is great, but it's still...
01:27:36.000 They should also put chips in them and bust the people buying it. 0.53
01:27:39.000 But China won't let you. 0.99
01:27:41.000 China won't give a fuck. 1.00
01:27:42.000 They're like, who cares? 1.00
01:27:43.000 So you got another dude who kills rhinos.
01:27:45.000 We'll just go to tigers. 1.00
01:27:47.000 Get some tiger dick next. 1.00
01:27:49.000 I went by in Tanzania next to the Serengeti. 0.99
01:27:52.000 The Serengeti is this huge national preserve.
01:27:55.000 And the place where I stayed, this guy, Paul Tudor Jones, who's a...
01:27:59.000 Sounds like a folk singer in the 70s.
01:28:01.000 He's in New York.
01:28:02.000 He's a New York hedge fund guy who's a philanthropist now.
01:28:05.000 And...
01:28:07.000 We're good to go.
01:28:23.000 And in 10 years time, it just exploded with animals.
01:28:27.000 The whole population is back.
01:28:29.000 Wow.
01:28:30.000 Poaching is a major, major, major problem.
01:28:33.000 You know what?
01:28:33.000 Here's the problem with poaching.
01:28:35.000 The word poaching.
01:28:37.000 A lot of it is... 0.99
01:28:39.000 Really fucking poor people that are just trying to survive. 0.99
01:28:43.000 So to say that poaching is an issue in Africa, poverty is an issue in Africa. 1.00
01:28:49.000 Poaching is a symptom of the poverty in Africa.
01:28:52.000 Of getting lunch.
01:28:53.000 And not even necessarily talking about the big money stuff like the ivory trade and the rhino horn trade.
01:28:59.000 That could be applied to that as well.
01:29:00.000 But a big part of poaching is just meat.
01:29:02.000 It's just eating.
01:29:03.000 Just stealing meat, yeah.
01:29:04.000 They call them poachers, but what they really are is that they're hunters, they aren't property owners.
01:29:09.000 Right.
01:29:09.000 And these guys, they run around, they do snares, they catch these animals in snares, they have these really shitty, almost like musket-like guns that they've devised, like really similar.
01:29:20.000 They take a rifle, but they don't have bullets.
01:29:23.000 Put rocks in it? 1.00
01:29:24.000 They put things in it, and then they pack in gunpowder, and they light it, and they make it blow like a fucking rifle, or like a musket. 0.99
01:29:32.000 Yeah, they use some really shitty... 0.99
01:29:34.000 I mean, some of them do. 0.95
01:29:35.000 Yeah.
01:29:35.000 I know, you can't put your Western...
01:29:37.000 I know, there's a tendency to put everything through our Western prism and be like, you know, this is just a horrible thing.
01:29:43.000 But when you go through these villages where they literally are walking a mile for water, and you get meat, that's like a big thing.
01:29:51.000 I mean, look, these people...
01:29:53.000 It was my wife's birthday when we were there.
01:29:55.000 They don't have the phrase, happy birthday.
01:29:58.000 They don't celebrate birthdays like...
01:30:01.000 They said it's because you'll have to have gifts, we'll have to take time away from working, we'll have to do...
01:30:07.000 They just never came up with the concept, happy birthday, because their life is hard.
01:30:12.000 They don't have a lot of...
01:30:15.000 They don't have a word for dessert.
01:30:17.000 They don't celebrate.
01:30:18.000 They're hard-working, surviving people.
01:30:20.000 So just to the point that...
01:30:22.000 You're right, there are a lot of people that just need meat for their family, and they're not thinking that a tourist from LA is coming in and wants to take pictures of the zebra, you know what I mean?
01:30:33.000 But there's got to be a way to parse it out, because China still is a huge problem, and they're taking all these animals, you know, endangered animals, not for meat, you know what I mean?
01:30:43.000 They're coming in and taking rhinos, or they're taking cheetahs, where not many survive even just in nature.
01:30:49.000 Why are they taking cheetahs? 0.99
01:30:50.000 Just for their coats.
01:30:51.000 They like to make hats out of them.
01:30:53.000 Really?
01:30:53.000 Cheetahs?
01:30:54.000 I don't know.
01:30:55.000 Probably.
01:30:55.000 Jock straps.
01:30:56.000 It's all jock straps.
01:30:57.000 Just all cheetah jock straps in China. 0.85
01:31:00.000 You don't know that?
01:31:01.000 You've seen the cheetah jockstraps, right?
01:31:04.000 Most of the articles I'm finding on...
01:31:06.000 3D printed rhino horns?
01:31:08.000 Yeah, they have them and there was a couple companies that were going to start making them, but there are people that are saying it's not a good idea to have them introduced because it's going to cause more problems than they're already having with just the real ones.
01:31:20.000 They look real, but the thing is...
01:31:22.000 Is that a real?
01:31:23.000 Are those real or fake?
01:31:24.000 The picture I'm showing is real ones, but uh...
01:31:27.000 God, look how many of them there are.
01:31:29.000 Showing the problems that are going to come. 0.99
01:31:30.000 It's so fucked up that what's killing these crazy animals that we're going to miss so much... 0.99
01:31:35.000 I know. 1.00
01:31:35.000 It's a dinosaur! 1.00
01:31:36.000 It's a dinosaur.
01:31:37.000 It's like a stegosaurus or something.
01:31:39.000 It might as well be. 1.00
01:31:40.000 But what's killing them is this erroneous idea that the horns make your dick hard. 1.00
01:31:45.000 I mean, if that's not symptomatic or symbolic of how fucking bizarre humans are... 1.00
01:31:50.000 Yes. 0.99
01:31:51.000 And meanwhile, at the same time, there's plenty of fucking pills that actually do the job. 0.99
01:31:56.000 It's not like you're asking these rhino horns to do something that no pill could do. 0.99
01:32:00.000 We've solved this problem.
01:32:01.000 It's done.
01:32:02.000 It's done.
01:32:03.000 See Anna Nicole Smith.
01:32:06.000 Remember J. Howard Marshall, that old guy who married her?
01:32:09.000 That's creepy dude. 1.00
01:32:09.000 He's like in his 80s and he married that big-titted sloppy slut. 1.00
01:32:14.000 Why did he do that? 1.00
01:32:15.000 Because they had Viagra finally and he could fuck her. 1.00
01:32:18.000 That's right. 1.00
01:32:18.000 Yeah! 1.00
01:32:19.000 On a bed of money. 1.00
01:32:20.000 He just fucking kept his cowboy boots on and yeah! 1.00
01:32:23.000 That is a great point. 0.99
01:32:25.000 It's like, why the rhino thing?
01:32:27.000 Exactly.
01:32:28.000 But it's probably not just for their hard-on.
01:32:32.000 It's probably also because they think they can cure cancer with it.
01:32:35.000 No, no.
01:32:35.000 It's really more...
01:32:36.000 There's J. Howard Marshall and Anne Nicole.
01:32:38.000 It's really, I think, more of anything, a status symbol.
01:32:41.000 You come over to a man's house, you have some rhino tea, you both wear, you know, expense... 0.76
01:32:46.000 Cheetah.
01:32:46.000 Expensive Petit Philippe watches.
01:32:49.000 Right.
01:32:49.000 You know, you drive a Ferrari.
01:32:51.000 He has a Rolls Royce.
01:32:52.000 You talk about, you know, real estate you're buying, and you do something.
01:32:55.000 You pull out a Cuban cigar.
01:32:57.000 Tom, where'd you get the Cubans?
01:32:58.000 Hey, I got a buddy.
01:32:59.000 He lives in Miami.
01:33:01.000 Let's sit on the back porch and pretend we're gentlemen. 0.98
01:33:05.000 I mean, there's so many people that never fucking smoke cigars, and they get so pumped about getting a Cuban. 0.99
01:33:11.000 I got a Cuban. 0.99
01:33:12.000 Oh, you got a Cuban, huh? 1.00
01:33:13.000 What kind?
01:33:13.000 What do you got there?
01:33:14.000 Hoyo de Monterey, Double Corona.
01:33:17.000 Oh, it's a good one.
01:33:18.000 It's a fat one.
01:33:18.000 I like that after a steak.
01:33:20.000 It's just a fake with a label on it.
01:33:22.000 Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of those.
01:33:23.000 A lot of those.
01:33:24.000 I could tell the difference.
01:33:25.000 I used to buy real ones, but I used to buy real ones that would pretend they're fake from London.
01:33:31.000 I used to order them from London.
01:33:32.000 They would send them to me from a tobaccoist.
01:33:35.000 Nice.
01:33:36.000 Is that what they call them in London?
01:33:37.000 Tobaccoist. 0.69
01:33:38.000 And then they would send me the actual labels.
01:33:42.000 Like, weeks later.
01:33:43.000 Right.
01:33:43.000 So they'd send these things to me in boxes, and they would just be labeled Dominican cigars, and then I'd get them.
01:33:49.000 Brilliant.
01:33:49.000 But I had specific cigars that I would ask for.
01:33:52.000 It's just such a stupid... 1.00
01:33:53.000 As soon as I started smoking weed, I'd dump that habit. 1.00
01:33:55.000 Don't you like...
01:33:56.000 That's nonsense.
01:33:57.000 You don't find it enjoyable?
01:33:58.000 I do.
01:33:58.000 I do.
01:33:59.000 I do.
01:33:59.000 But it's just...
01:34:00.000 There's something about it that's very fetishy.
01:34:03.000 There's something about it that's very affected.
01:34:05.000 It's like you're putting on airs.
01:34:08.000 Definitely.
01:34:09.000 Yeah.
01:34:09.000 When I smoke...
01:34:10.000 I see a guy with a fat face and he's got a cigar. 1.00
01:34:12.000 I'm like, oh, what does this dipshit have to say? 1.00
01:34:14.000 Yeah, everyone on the cover of Cigar Aficionado looks like an asshole. 1.00
01:34:17.000 Oh yeah, if you're just standing there smiling. 1.00
01:34:19.000 Yeah, come on. 1.00
01:34:20.000 But, when you're just being that asshole... 1.00
01:34:23.000 Did Shug Knight ever make it onto the cover of Cigar Aficionado? 1.00
01:34:27.000 Please find out.
01:34:28.000 That's a good question.
01:34:29.000 He always had a cigar.
01:34:30.000 He was a good spokesman for the brand.
01:34:34.000 That is part of the appeal.
01:34:35.000 You do sit back and just say, you know what...
01:34:38.000 Yeah, I'm alright.
01:34:40.000 You know what I mean?
01:34:41.000 You sit back, everything's good.
01:34:42.000 I'm here good.
01:34:43.000 I got a cigar.
01:34:44.000 When I got my family back from that vacation and nobody had malaria or cuts or any emergencies and I got them all the way back from Africa, I sat out back with one and I was like, yeah. 0.95
01:34:54.000 Yeah. 0.93
01:34:55.000 Fucking A right I did that. 0.99
01:34:56.000 I'm American. 0.99
01:34:57.000 Yeah.
01:34:57.000 Back here in California.
01:34:59.000 I'm a man.
01:34:59.000 Back here, I might vote Republican.
01:35:01.000 I don't give a fuck. 0.99
01:35:03.000 I am a lion. 0.99
01:35:04.000 How about we give Donald Trump a chance to make America great again?
01:35:07.000 No, you're going too far.
01:35:08.000 You're taking him too far.
01:35:09.000 Who's that?
01:35:10.000 Sean Combs.
01:35:10.000 Look at him.
01:35:11.000 Looking like an asshole. 1.00
01:35:12.000 Everyone looks like an asshole. 1.00
01:35:13.000 Little tiny hands. 1.00
01:35:14.000 Jack Nicholson's the only one that doesn't look like an asshole. 1.00
01:35:16.000 How little his hands are. 1.00
01:35:17.000 Yeah, Jack Nicholson.
01:35:18.000 Jack's made for it.
01:35:19.000 But Jack Nicholson also looks like he didn't pose.
01:35:21.000 Is there something wrong with his hands or is it me?
01:35:24.000 Puff Daddy's hands look very small.
01:35:26.000 They're in front of him.
01:35:27.000 They look weird.
01:35:28.000 They don't look like they're part of him.
01:35:30.000 They're way out in front of him.
01:35:31.000 The perspective looks weird.
01:35:32.000 But they're small.
01:35:34.000 So if you put it up to his chest, he'd be like, you got little boy hands.
01:35:37.000 You got little baby hands with your cigar.
01:35:40.000 Look at Usher.
01:35:41.000 He played Sugar Ray Leonard in that new Roberto Duran movie.
01:35:44.000 Usher can box, apparently. 0.75
01:35:46.000 Oh yeah?
01:35:46.000 Yeah!
01:35:47.000 Hands of Stone.
01:35:49.000 Yeah, he played Sugar Ray. 1.00
01:35:52.000 Everyone looks like an asshole. 1.00
01:35:53.000 Let's pull up the most asshole-ish covers of popular cigar or cigar aficionado. 1.00
01:35:59.000 Jack Nicholson looks great. 0.97
01:36:00.000 Vince Vaughn looks pretty douchey right there.
01:36:02.000 Click that. 1.00
01:36:03.000 Oh yeah, Vince, what the fuck? 1.00
01:36:04.000 What are you, plotting things? 1.00
01:36:06.000 Hey, as brothers in this thing that we have together.
01:36:13.000 You can't not look douchey! 1.00
01:36:15.000 No, you all look like an idiot. 1.00
01:36:16.000 Oh, Charlie Sheen. 1.00
01:36:17.000 Oh, Charlie Sheen. 0.72
01:36:18.000 I have AIDS in this cigar. 0.79
01:36:20.000 I'm smoking AIDS. I don't give a fuck. 1.00
01:36:24.000 Everybody was into Charlie Sheen until he got HIV. They smell so bad. 1.00
01:36:28.000 You can't have one without thinking...
01:36:32.000 What is this, Jamie?
01:36:32.000 Screw everybody.
01:36:34.000 You know what I mean? 0.90
01:36:35.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
01:36:36.000 Like, when you smoke a cigar, you're saying, fuck you guys. 1.00
01:36:37.000 I'm smoking this. 1.00
01:36:38.000 I know it's awful, but I'm enjoying it.
01:36:40.000 True.
01:36:40.000 So, when you see a guy with it, that's what you're seeing in his eyes.
01:36:43.000 William Schachner.
01:36:44.000 Yes.
01:36:45.000 He looks pretty good.
01:36:46.000 You know, he purposely adds weight.
01:36:49.000 He puts weight on and keeps weight on because it fills his face in, and he keeps him from looking wrinkly.
01:36:55.000 Al Roker should take that advice.
01:36:57.000 Well, Al Roker did the opposite.
01:36:59.000 I know, now he looks too skinny.
01:37:01.000 You know Joe Montaña?
01:37:02.000 Joe looks pretty good.
01:37:03.000 Do you know that guy's a gun nut?
01:37:05.000 Is he?
01:37:05.000 He's got a gun show.
01:37:07.000 I've watched his gun show.
01:37:08.000 He's got a gun show on the Sports News Channel.
01:37:11.000 No, no.
01:37:11.000 Yes, he does.
01:37:12.000 Get out.
01:37:13.000 Yes, he does.
01:37:13.000 I watched it.
01:37:14.000 You're thinking of Joe Montaña.
01:37:16.000 No, no, no.
01:37:17.000 Joe Montaña. 1.00
01:37:18.000 He has a fucking gun history show. 1.00
01:37:20.000 And he shoots guns constantly. 1.00
01:37:23.000 That's crazy. 0.94
01:37:23.000 He's a gun nut. 0.94
01:37:24.000 Like a full-on Second Amendment NRA. Oh, no.
01:37:29.000 I don't say that in a negative way.
01:37:30.000 I like guns.
01:37:31.000 Yeah.
01:37:32.000 I do too.
01:37:34.000 I don't like him, but he likes him though.
01:37:35.000 Right.
01:37:35.000 I'm sure he's not going to be open to any ideas.
01:37:38.000 Oh, maybe.
01:37:39.000 See?
01:37:40.000 Gun Stories is the name of his show.
01:37:41.000 That's great.
01:37:42.000 He's a gun nut.
01:37:43.000 He's got a gold pistol there.
01:37:45.000 I bet he's rock hard right now.
01:37:47.000 I bet he's like Anthony Weiner rock hard.
01:37:50.000 Strapped down inside his boxer shorts. 1.00
01:37:52.000 A fucking angry hog. 1.00
01:37:55.000 Ready to go. 1.00
01:37:56.000 He really loves guns. 1.00
01:37:57.000 It's a fucking show. 1.00
01:37:59.000 It's on the Outdoor Channel. 1.00
01:38:00.000 I've watched his show.
01:38:03.000 Does it make me less of a man that my passion is bread?
01:38:06.000 No, no.
01:38:08.000 You're the sultan of sourdough.
01:38:09.000 It's not just that your passion is bread.
01:38:11.000 You take it to a whole new level.
01:38:12.000 Thank you, Joe.
01:38:13.000 You were featured in the New York Times.
01:38:14.000 Thank you, Joe.
01:38:15.000 This Joe Mantegna thing is interesting, though, because I haven't seen him in movies in a long time.
01:38:20.000 And he's a brilliant actor.
01:38:22.000 I know. 0.98
01:38:22.000 I mean, this guy's been in some fucking amazing movies. 0.98
01:38:25.000 But now, what he does, he took all that money and just shoots shit. 1.00
01:38:29.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:38:29.000 He golfs a lot, too. 1.00
01:38:31.000 I think he's always in those golf tournaments.
01:38:32.000 He might be one of them Arizona dudes. 0.99
01:38:35.000 You know, Arizona, to this day, is the goddamn Wild West. 0.98
01:38:39.000 It's the Florida of the Southwest. 0.99
01:38:42.000 You know what I mean?
01:38:43.000 A lot of people end up there with their own ideas.
01:38:45.000 Oh, they got their own ideas.
01:38:47.000 Yeah, and that's why they had that sheriff to put everybody in pink underwear. 1.00
01:38:50.000 Remember that guy?
01:38:50.000 Yeah.
01:38:51.000 He's still there.
01:38:52.000 Aleppo.
01:38:52.000 Joe Arpaio.
01:38:54.000 Joe Arpaio.
01:38:56.000 Yeah.
01:38:56.000 He just got in trouble.
01:38:57.000 He's good buddies with Steven Seagal.
01:38:59.000 He'll get him out of trouble.
01:38:59.000 Steven will get him out of trouble.
01:39:01.000 Was that video real with Steven Seagal's Brando size now?
01:39:05.000 He was doing moves and stuff?
01:39:06.000 Oh, he's enormous.
01:39:06.000 Yeah, he's enormous.
01:39:08.000 He's really big, right?
01:39:08.000 He's enormous.
01:39:09.000 Yeah, I've run into him at the UFC a bunch of times.
01:39:12.000 He still has his skills?
01:39:16.000 Well, what those skills are, he's good at those things that he's doing in those movies.
01:39:25.000 Would those things actually work?
01:39:26.000 No, they would not work.
01:39:28.000 What you're seeing in those things is what you would call active compliance.
01:39:33.000 Uh-huh.
01:39:34.000 So, voluntary compliance, maybe.
01:39:36.000 Right.
01:39:36.000 Where someone, look how big he is.
01:39:38.000 Yay! 0.99
01:39:38.000 It's so hilarious. 0.99
01:39:39.000 It looks like South Park. 0.87
01:39:41.000 He's riding around, there's a bunch of people I've got to kill, and he's just got this enormous gut. 0.99
01:39:46.000 He's huge!
01:39:47.000 He keeps making these movies, and I'm sure they do really well in foreign markets, you know?
01:39:52.000 Yeah.
01:39:52.000 It's probably one of those things where if you're in Bulgaria, it's like Steven Seagal Night every Tuesday.
01:39:57.000 It almost looks like he's kidding, right?
01:39:59.000 Like the way he holds the gun and stuff?
01:40:00.000 He's so big!
01:40:03.000 Joe Montagna, by the way, was in Criminal Minds with 205 episodes and just stopped this year.
01:40:10.000 Who is this guy that he's...
01:40:11.000 I've seen, like, this guy before.
01:40:14.000 Who's the guy, the white guy?
01:40:15.000 That guy.
01:40:16.000 Oh, yeah, I have seen him.
01:40:19.000 To say Code of Honor.
01:40:21.000 Oh.
01:40:22.000 2016. Oh, it's coming out.
01:40:24.000 It's coming out now.
01:40:25.000 Look out.
01:40:25.000 There's a bomb about to go off and I have a knife.
01:40:28.000 Ooh, watch me walk away.
01:40:29.000 Dude, the classic walk away.
01:40:30.000 Look how dyed his hair is.
01:40:32.000 The walk away without looking back as the bomb goes off.
01:40:35.000 Yeah.
01:40:36.000 That is original and awesome.
01:40:41.000 Who's the guy?
01:40:41.000 Who's the other guy?
01:40:42.000 That other guy that's in those movies.
01:40:46.000 Does it say?
01:40:47.000 Craig Sheffer.
01:40:47.000 Yeah, Craig Sheffer.
01:40:49.000 Okay.
01:40:50.000 Oh, you know who that guy is?
01:40:52.000 That guy's in that movie, A River Ran Through It.
01:40:56.000 Is that him?
01:40:58.000 He was Brad Pitt's brother in that movie.
01:41:02.000 There's a hell that some actors fall into.
01:41:06.000 Yeah, that's him, man.
01:41:07.000 Oh, yeah.
01:41:07.000 Wow.
01:41:09.000 There's a hell that some actors fall into.
01:41:12.000 Wow. 0.97
01:41:13.000 I think that dude's nutty, though. 0.98
01:41:15.000 I think that guy's very nutty. 0.99
01:41:16.000 I think he is nutty. 0.99
01:41:17.000 I was at a restaurant once, and that guy was, like, talking to a couple. 0.93
01:41:20.000 He was eating by himself with a bandana on.
01:41:22.000 He was talking to a couple about someone being an old soul.
01:41:26.000 Oh, God.
01:41:27.000 Just one of that thing.
01:41:28.000 Is that him now?
01:41:28.000 Wow, he looks so different.
01:41:29.000 Oh, he's got a wig on.
01:41:31.000 That's definitely not hair.
01:41:32.000 Yeah, but...
01:41:33.000 What's going on there?
01:41:34.000 Back up.
01:41:35.000 Back up, Jamie.
01:41:36.000 Why are you getting away from that wig?
01:41:38.000 What's happening there?
01:41:41.000 What's going on?
01:41:42.000 Just put a wig on it. 0.57
01:41:43.000 Is he crying?
01:41:43.000 Or is that a mouse?
01:41:44.000 Oh, that's your cursor. 0.99
01:41:48.000 Yeah, that guy was in a lot of good shit, though. 0.98
01:41:51.000 And now he's doing these weird movies. 0.99
01:41:53.000 Joe Mantegna works.
01:41:55.000 Yeah, I'm sure.
01:41:56.000 Criminal Minds.
01:41:57.000 He was in a really big series.
01:41:59.000 Oh, yeah?
01:41:59.000 Yeah.
01:42:00.000 You ever see him on CBS? Oh, that's right.
01:42:03.000 He was in that fucking horror movie, too. 0.99
01:42:05.000 That Craig Sheffer guy was in that horror movie. 0.99
01:42:07.000 Remember that weird horror movie that was based on... 0.99
01:42:10.000 The fuck's his name? 0.99
01:42:11.000 Werewolf? 1.00
01:42:12.000 No, no, no, no, no.
01:42:13.000 That one.
01:42:13.000 What movie was that?
01:42:15.000 I don't know.
01:42:16.000 Johnny Scary Face? 1.00
01:42:18.000 I forget the fucking movie, man. 1.00
01:42:21.000 But... 0.99
01:42:23.000 There was a guy who wrote...
01:42:26.000 Tales from the Crypt.
01:42:27.000 What is it?
01:42:27.000 Night Read?
01:42:28.000 Ascension.
01:42:29.000 Night Read?
01:42:30.000 He's best known as horror fans as the star of Night Read.
01:42:33.000 Night Breed?
01:42:34.000 Night Read.
01:42:35.000 Are you sure?
01:42:36.000 That might be a typo.
01:42:36.000 It's about reading Good Night Moon.
01:42:38.000 That seems like a typo.
01:42:39.000 It's really scary.
01:42:40.000 Go try Night Breed.
01:42:44.000 Night Breed?
01:42:45.000 Yeah.
01:42:47.000 Yeah, who made that movie, man?
01:42:50.000 Because it was one of those...
01:42:51.000 Look at that.
01:42:52.000 Who was the director and writer of that movie?
01:42:56.000 It looks like a Halloween shop.
01:42:57.000 Because he was a famous sort of a...
01:42:59.000 Clive Barker.
01:43:00.000 Clive Barker, right.
01:43:01.000 That was Clive Barker?
01:43:02.000 Yeah, yeah. 0.99
01:43:03.000 Clive Barker made a bunch of like really freaky fucking movies. 0.98
01:43:06.000 Like really interesting, weird takes on horror. 0.99
01:43:09.000 Right.
01:43:10.000 And apparently a very good writer, right?
01:43:12.000 Like his books...
01:43:13.000 I'm not making that up, right?
01:43:14.000 Right.
01:43:15.000 You don't think so?
01:43:16.000 I don't think you're making it up.
01:43:18.000 Oh, okay.
01:43:19.000 Yeah, I think that's where it all started out, is from his writing.
01:43:23.000 I think he was a famous horror writer.
01:43:25.000 And then they did a few of his movies back in the day, but for whatever reason they didn't catch on.
01:43:29.000 But Nightbreed was a really interesting one.
01:43:31.000 And that Craig Sheffer guy was in that.
01:43:35.000 Was he ever on Cigar Aficionado?
01:43:38.000 No.
01:43:39.000 Never made it.
01:43:41.000 But Brad probably did.
01:43:42.000 He probably got mad.
01:43:43.000 Bought the issue. 1.00
01:43:45.000 Fucking Brad on this shit. 1.00
01:43:47.000 I'm not here. 1.00
01:43:48.000 This fat guy is throwing kicks at me. 1.00
01:43:54.000 When you're in those movies, that's a fucking hell, man. 1.00
01:43:58.000 Brian Callen is a great guy to talk to this about. 0.99
01:44:01.000 Because Brian Callen knows a lot of those actors.
01:44:04.000 He knows a lot of actors.
01:44:05.000 And he's had friends that were really famous actors at one point, and now they have been forced to take these gigs whenever they can get them.
01:44:14.000 Right.
01:44:14.000 And they're away from their family for months at a time, and they don't make much money.
01:44:18.000 And their hope is that this does well, and that eventually, it's like you're in a holding pattern, hoping that you catch fire with a good film, and then it gets you into another film, and then you're back.
01:44:29.000 But when you drop off, and especially if there's a transitionary period between you being a 30-year-old man and you being a 50-year-old man, those 50-year-old guys are fucksville. 1.00
01:44:38.000 They're fucked. 0.99
01:44:39.000 Nobody wants you until you're 60, and then you're someone's dad. 1.00
01:44:42.000 So there's this period of time where you're not quite old enough to be a dad, but you're definitely not young enough to be the hot guy.
01:44:49.000 The lead guy. 1.00
01:44:50.000 Yeah, you can't be really an ass-kicker. 1.00
01:44:52.000 Nobody's going to believe it. 1.00
01:44:54.000 You know, like, Steven Seagal has to do all kinds of crazy shit to maintain ass-kicking status. 0.99
01:44:58.000 All the time. 0.99
01:44:59.000 Yeah, his beard's dyed, the hair is a masterpiece.
01:45:04.000 There's a lot going on.
01:45:05.000 So maybe he's doing the Shatner thing.
01:45:06.000 Maybe he's like, I'll just put the weight on and just be a bigger guy.
01:45:08.000 It's a good move.
01:45:09.000 It's a good move, apparently, Shatner says.
01:45:11.000 Keeps your face full.
01:45:13.000 It's like the opposite of, it's his version of collagen.
01:45:15.000 Just fill it up.
01:45:16.000 It's pretty smart.
01:45:17.000 Just fill that.
01:45:18.000 He does it on purpose.
01:45:19.000 Yeah, I get it.
01:45:20.000 He really, allegedly, he says, he might just be an excuse for why he just drinks every night.
01:45:26.000 Right, he can't stop drinking.
01:45:27.000 Yeah.
01:45:29.000 But he looked pretty good on Cigar Aficionado.
01:45:32.000 Jack Nicholson, I think, agreed is the best.
01:45:35.000 If they called you tomorrow, would you do it?
01:45:37.000 Yeah.
01:45:38.000 What would you do?
01:45:40.000 Ah, that's a good move.
01:45:43.000 Is there a way to do it and not be wacky or douchey?
01:45:46.000 Just you holding it, you feel douchey.
01:45:49.000 Yeah.
01:45:50.000 How about you just stand there and it just says, trust me, I smoke cigars, and there's no cigar in sight.
01:45:54.000 Look at that.
01:45:55.000 Yeah, that doesn't work.
01:45:56.000 Matthew McConaughey.
01:45:57.000 Does not work.
01:45:58.000 Yeah, I know how many takes that was.
01:46:01.000 If that was one picture, if he was just there, he pulled up in his car, hey, how y'all doing?
01:46:05.000 And then he took a picture and he had the cigar, bam.
01:46:08.000 Cool.
01:46:08.000 But see, the problem with those photos is they are not candid.
01:46:12.000 Not close. 0.96
01:46:13.000 So, if you're an intelligent person that understands that, and you're watching these fucking magazine stands, you know that there was some douchery involved in making this cover. 0.98
01:46:22.000 That is one of 500. Brad Paisley. 0.98
01:46:24.000 Hey y'all, I got a white hat on because I'm a good guy.
01:46:27.000 You want me to do it with the black hat now?
01:46:28.000 You want me to do it with the black hat?
01:46:29.000 I'm a white hat sort of a guy, according to my record label.
01:46:33.000 So, is that Jeremy Piven down there?
01:46:35.000 Yep.
01:46:35.000 Oh, does he have a glass in his hand?
01:46:37.000 You know they changed outfits, there was a makeup lady, you know what I mean?
01:46:41.000 It's just...
01:46:42.000 Oh, what's this?
01:46:44.000 No cigar! 0.99
01:46:46.000 There's no fucking cigar! 0.99
01:46:48.000 Yeah, him and De Niro had no cigar. 1.00
01:46:49.000 Hey, what the fuck is this, Kiefer? 1.00
01:46:52.000 Listen, pussy. 1.00
01:46:53.000 You're scared to pull it off. 1.00
01:46:55.000 Look at Kramer.
01:46:56.000 Oh, James Bond.
01:46:57.000 No cigar.
01:46:58.000 Wait.
01:46:59.000 Go to Kramer's over there.
01:47:00.000 By the way, best James Bond by far, right?
01:47:02.000 Daniel Craig.
01:47:03.000 No one's even close.
01:47:04.000 Yeah, he's the coolest.
01:47:05.000 Oh, Kramer.
01:47:07.000 Look at that.
01:47:08.000 Kramer.
01:47:09.000 He's lovable.
01:47:09.000 You know what he's thinking when he's holding that cigar?
01:47:13.000 I love black people.
01:47:14.000 Yeah, I was just thinking that word.
01:47:16.000 I was thinking that word that rhymes with bigger.
01:47:22.000 Danny DeVito, he's got something going on.
01:47:24.000 What is he doing?
01:47:25.000 He's lighting it?
01:47:26.000 Too adorable.
01:47:27.000 Danny, there's too many takes there.
01:47:29.000 I know there was more than one take.
01:47:32.000 Arnold, I can pull it off.
01:47:34.000 I can do it.
01:47:35.000 I'm dead on the inside.
01:47:36.000 I don't care.
01:47:37.000 This is good for publicity.
01:47:39.000 This is good for my image.
01:47:41.000 When I smoke a cigar, it gives you the feeling of prosperity. 1.00
01:47:45.000 I live in a mansion in the Palisades and I fuck my maid. 1.00
01:47:51.000 I come inside them. 1.00
01:47:54.000 I don't care. 1.00
01:47:55.000 Leave your woman with me. 1.00
01:47:56.000 I come inside her as well. 0.99
01:48:02.000 That's why his cover works.
01:48:04.000 Adrian Brody.
01:48:04.000 I'm just sitting here wondering what happened.
01:48:08.000 You're right.
01:48:09.000 Arnold is the perfect person to have on there.
01:48:11.000 See, Sylvester Stallone seems fairly candid in that photo, but I'm worried there was too many takes.
01:48:18.000 I'm worried they took several takes. 0.98
01:48:20.000 There's a guy who looks pretty fucking jiffy for 70 years old.
01:48:23.000 Even if you are Stallone and you let it go, do you let them put Stallone Zone as your captain? 0.91
01:48:28.000 No, no, no.
01:48:29.000 You can't do that.
01:48:30.000 No, no, no, no.
01:48:32.000 I kind of like Stallone Zone.
01:48:34.000 It's pretty good.
01:48:35.000 I like what you're doing.
01:48:35.000 By the way, I met that guy.
01:48:37.000 Fucking super friendly, nice, normal, self-deprecating guy. 0.99
01:48:41.000 Very cool. 0.99
01:48:42.000 I mean, he might have been turning on the charm because I had to interview him for this thing for the UFC once, but he was fucking nice. 0.79
01:48:47.000 I met that guy too, Lawrence Fishburne. 0.99
01:48:49.000 Nice as fuck. 0.99
01:48:51.000 Super friendly. 0.99
01:48:52.000 Is that Rob Lowe up there?
01:48:53.000 Does Rob Lowe have a cigar in his hand?
01:48:55.000 How you pulling it off, Rob?
01:48:57.000 He's got enough douching him before I buy it.
01:49:00.000 Look at his jacket. 1.00
01:49:01.000 He's got that fucking golfing jacket on, that country club jacket. 1.00
01:49:05.000 They just did the roast of Rob Lowe this weekend. 1.00
01:49:07.000 Right.
01:49:08.000 Why does he have so many layers on?
01:49:09.000 I'm confused about his white t-shirt, then polo shirt, then jacket. 0.99
01:49:13.000 Can someone turn the fucking heat on? 0.98
01:49:15.000 Rob's inside. 1.00
01:49:16.000 Why does he have to dress like he's layering for a fucking backpacking trip in the Andes? 0.99
01:49:21.000 But you know, you hit on something. 0.99
01:49:23.000 If you embrace your douchery, it works.
01:49:27.000 If you're trying to not be a douche with it, It doesn't work.
01:49:32.000 Oh, Cosby. 0.59
01:49:33.000 Go down there to Cosby.
01:49:34.000 Oh, Jesus.
01:49:36.000 Oh, look, and he's got a glass of something.
01:49:39.000 An espresso.
01:49:39.000 That's what he jammed him with, right?
01:49:41.000 Didn't he jam him up with, like, cappuccinos?
01:49:43.000 He put it in a drink. 0.97
01:49:44.000 He did, because cappuccinos taste kind of shitty anyway. 0.71
01:49:47.000 You're kind of pretending it tastes good. 1.00
01:49:49.000 Get it with that fucking roofie in it. 1.00
01:49:51.000 That cunt. 1.00
01:49:53.000 Oh, my God. 1.00
01:49:54.000 There was one above that.
01:49:55.000 There was one above that, Jamie.
01:49:57.000 That I didn't recognize the gentleman.
01:49:59.000 Right to the upper left with the black blazer on.
01:50:01.000 Upper left.
01:50:03.000 Above that one.
01:50:03.000 Right above that one.
01:50:04.000 No, no, no.
01:50:06.000 Back where you were.
01:50:07.000 Go Cosby and then go up one and then to the left.
01:50:10.000 To the left.
01:50:10.000 Bang, that guy.
01:50:11.000 Who's that fucking guy? 1.00
01:50:12.000 The bomber. 1.00
01:50:13.000 That's not real.
01:50:14.000 Oh. 1.00
01:50:15.000 What the fuck is that? 1.00
01:50:16.000 Oh, it's a fake cover. 1.00
01:50:18.000 Look at his Mad Magazine at the bottom.
01:50:19.000 Oh.
01:50:20.000 Well, what that's doing is it's mocking the Rolling Stone cover. 0.99
01:50:25.000 Because Rolling Stone put him on the cover and he looks like a fucking teen heartthrob. 0.99
01:50:28.000 Yeah, that was douchey. 0.99
01:50:29.000 Well, it was weird.
01:50:30.000 It was really weird.
01:50:31.000 But is it douchey?
01:50:32.000 Here's my question.
01:50:33.000 It's just a photo of him, and it is curious.
01:50:36.000 They took a tremendous amount of criticism for this cover.
01:50:39.000 Yeah.
01:50:39.000 Okay?
01:50:40.000 Well, I'm looking at this.
01:50:41.000 This is just...
01:50:42.000 What happened?
01:50:46.000 You're looking at this.
01:50:47.000 This is just a young man, and he has a cover of a magazine.
01:50:54.000 It's your job to put things on Rolling Stone, and you know how to look at things that make people feel a certain way.
01:51:00.000 So maybe they were trying to make them feel like, hey, a monster can look like this.
01:51:06.000 Yeah, but listen to the heading.
01:51:08.000 How a popular, promising student was fueled by his family...
01:51:14.000 What?
01:51:14.000 Was failed.
01:51:15.000 Oh, was failed.
01:51:16.000 Was failed by his family, fell into radical Islam, and became... 1.00
01:51:21.000 A monster. 0.99
01:51:22.000 Yeah.
01:51:23.000 You're making that, see now, with the headline, I dislike it even more.
01:51:27.000 Because now you're making him seem like he's just a vulnerable, not, it's not his fault.
01:51:30.000 You're excusing him, I think, with that photo and that headline combined.
01:51:34.000 It feels to me like you're letting him off the hook.
01:51:37.000 Well, that is a weird question.
01:51:40.000 Why is it that you do that when you read a couple letters of a word and just fill it in for yourself?
01:51:44.000 I do that all the time.
01:51:46.000 Yeah.
01:51:46.000 Where I'll find myself, even if I'm wearing reading glasses, I fill in a word and then I go, oh, it's that word.
01:51:52.000 Yeah.
01:51:52.000 For whatever reason, I don't look at the whole world.
01:51:56.000 I saw fueled.
01:51:57.000 Yeah.
01:51:57.000 Because I was thinking, okay, they would say he's fueled by hate or fueled by his radical religion.
01:52:02.000 I wouldn't have been so douchey and corrected you, but I did change the meaning of it.
01:52:05.000 Yeah, but how old is this kid at the time?
01:52:07.000 Because I think if you're looking at him...
01:52:08.000 That's like an 18-year-old kid.
01:52:09.000 Yeah, I mean, that's relevant.
01:52:11.000 I mean, you have a 14-year-old. 1.00
01:52:12.000 Imagine if your kid grew up in some fucking radical, crazy fuckhead religion. 1.00
01:52:20.000 Look, there's a good question to that. 1.00
01:52:22.000 How did this kid become this monster? 0.96
01:52:25.000 How did he become this monster? 0.68
01:52:26.000 Well, his was his brother, right? 0.94
01:52:27.000 His brother was a big influence.
01:52:29.000 His brother definitely was an influence.
01:52:31.000 But I mean, he's in there, right?
01:52:32.000 So he's in this magazine, he's on the cover, and they have this picture of him that makes you go, wow, yeah... 0.97
01:52:38.000 What the fuck is wrong with that picture? 0.95
01:52:40.000 What's wrong with it is that he looks like a cute young guy that shouldn't have that problem. 0.99
01:52:45.000 They're not saying young heartthrob, you know, contact him behind bars.
01:52:50.000 They're just showing an actual picture of what he actually looked like.
01:52:53.000 How is that any different than the Ted Bundy photos?
01:52:56.000 Because the Ted Bundy photos, one of the things that was most striking about Ted Bundy was that he's a very handsome guy. 0.98
01:53:02.000 So it's kind of fucking creepy, man. 0.69
01:53:04.000 But you don't put them on the cover of Rolling Stone, which is a space for the people in our culture that you worship. 0.97
01:53:11.000 Right?
01:53:12.000 They didn't put Ted Bundy on the cover with the Rolling Stone logo around you.
01:53:16.000 That's a good point.
01:53:17.000 You know what I mean?
01:53:17.000 That's a good point.
01:53:19.000 It's a good point, but should they bear the burden of that?
01:53:22.000 Should they be able to be flexible enough with their covers, with their ideas, to just say, what happened here?
01:53:27.000 Well, you take this guy who could be on our cover because he's a pop star.
01:53:31.000 He could be on the cover because he's a star of some new sitcom that's hilarious.
01:53:35.000 Right.
01:53:35.000 You're looking at that kid?
01:53:36.000 Right.
01:53:36.000 He looks like a star.
01:53:38.000 He looks like a star.
01:53:39.000 And that's what I'm saying.
01:53:40.000 These people, they know what they're doing when they're putting that cover on.
01:53:44.000 You are provoking, hey, this is a regular kid that going this way could have been on the cover of Rolling Stone.
01:53:52.000 They're definitely creating it to be thought-provoking.
01:53:54.000 Do you think when guys bang him in prison, they put that picture on his back?
01:53:59.000 Yes.
01:54:00.000 They've got it up in the cell.
01:54:02.000 They want to know. 0.99
01:54:02.000 Like, look, I'm fucking making it here. 0.99
01:54:04.000 Right. 0.99
01:54:05.000 I'm banging this guy.
01:54:06.000 Yeah.
01:54:07.000 He's beautiful.
01:54:08.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:54:09.000 It is kind of fucked up, but I don't... 0.98
01:54:11.000 Like, they're saying there's something wrong with that photograph, particularly. 0.99
01:54:15.000 Like, they could have had a picture of him being handcuffed, terrified, look at his face, shocked, covered with blood, or anything along those lines, and everybody would have been okay with it.
01:54:24.000 Mm-hmm.
01:54:25.000 Right?
01:54:25.000 Mm-hmm.
01:54:26.000 Yeah.
01:54:26.000 Wouldn't they be?
01:54:27.000 Yeah, for sure.
01:54:28.000 It's because it's a sultry, innocent...
01:54:32.000 Yeah.
01:54:34.000 Isn't that a problem with static images in the first place?
01:54:38.000 Static images are such poor representations of what a person actually looks like and who that person actually is.
01:54:44.000 It's one of the weirder things about photos, and then you see a bio below the photo, and you're standing there.
01:54:49.000 Tom Papa's been doing stand-up at clubs and colleges all throughout the country.
01:54:54.000 This is a portrayal, a two-dimensional portrayal of a person.
01:55:00.000 There's a picture of me out from when I hosted this game show on Fox, just for a summer.
01:55:07.000 And there's this shot of me in a suit.
01:55:09.000 I look so douchey.
01:55:10.000 I'm glaring at the camera.
01:55:12.000 I look like a magician.
01:55:14.000 For some reason, that picture is everywhere.
01:55:17.000 Anytime I go to a city, anytime I go to perform, anytime someone puts an ad out for a show, that's the picture.
01:55:23.000 I would not buy a ticket to see that guy.
01:55:27.000 I can't scrub it from the internet.
01:55:30.000 Oh, it's terrible. 0.99
01:55:31.000 I wouldn't buy a ticket to see any comic ever based on any fucking headshot I've ever seen. 0.99
01:55:36.000 That's a good point. 0.99
01:55:37.000 That makes me feel a little better.
01:55:38.000 Even Bill Hicks.
01:55:39.000 Bill Hicks' headshot was him lighting a cigarette with the American flag.
01:55:44.000 Yeah.
01:55:44.000 I'd be like, oh, what are you, a rebel?
01:55:46.000 You fucking clown. 1.00
01:55:48.000 Hardcore. 1.00
01:55:49.000 Oh, dude, you're on the edge.
01:55:51.000 It's true.
01:55:52.000 There's no way to look cool.
01:55:54.000 Yeah, that was Bill's headshot.
01:55:56.000 Yeah.
01:55:57.000 But, you know, in his defense, in 1988, that was a radical thing to do.
01:56:01.000 That was.
01:56:02.000 And that was back when there was, like, a big problem with people burning the flag.
01:56:06.000 The flag, yeah, during the Bush, Bush I. Bush I, yeah, I remember that.
01:56:10.000 They were, like, trying to take measures to stop people from burning the flag.
01:56:14.000 Yeah.
01:56:14.000 We're burning the flag!
01:56:16.000 And Bill Hicks had a bit about it.
01:56:17.000 Yeah.
01:56:18.000 You know, my daddy fought for this flag in Korea.
01:56:20.000 Yeah.
01:56:21.000 He goes, what a coincidence.
01:56:22.000 My flag was made in Korea.
01:56:23.000 Yeah.
01:56:24.000 Great joke.
01:56:25.000 Did you hear about the controversy about the football player this weekend not wanting to stand during the national anthem?
01:56:29.000 Yeah, Kaepernick.
01:56:30.000 What was he protesting?
01:56:33.000 The country.
01:56:35.000 The whole country?
01:56:36.000 The flat earth?
01:56:37.000 Is he a flat earther?
01:56:38.000 He doesn't want to stand for a country that allows violence against people of color.
01:56:43.000 Is that what it is? 0.81
01:56:44.000 Is he a black guy or a white guy?
01:56:46.000 Oh, good.
01:56:47.000 Mostly, I guess.
01:56:47.000 He's a white guy.
01:56:48.000 I fucking hate him. 1.00
01:56:50.000 That guy looks pretty white to me. 1.00
01:56:52.000 You sure that's a black guy? 0.94
01:56:54.000 Okay, that's... 0.87
01:56:54.000 There he looks very... 0.87
01:56:55.000 He looks a little Middle Eastern, if you ask me.
01:56:58.000 Oh, boy.
01:56:59.000 He's a bigger troublemaker than I thought.
01:57:01.000 Looks like you can see him hanging around the pyramids, if you ask me.
01:57:04.000 So, what is he saying?
01:57:06.000 He won't stand?
01:57:07.000 Did he have a statement?
01:57:08.000 Yeah, he had a statement.
01:57:09.000 Mmm, always.
01:57:10.000 They always have a statement. 0.98
01:57:12.000 You have some fucking respect for people who serve, especially people... 0.99
01:57:15.000 Who says that? 0.99
01:57:16.000 That's on him, yeah.
01:57:17.000 It's Boone.
01:57:18.000 Someone's really upset.
01:57:19.000 Drives me nuts.
01:57:20.000 Someone's yelling about it.
01:57:21.000 My view is that the anthem is about honoring the people who serve.
01:57:24.000 This is another person, too.
01:57:25.000 Find out what his actual quote is.
01:57:27.000 What was his quote?
01:57:32.000 I'm here to play games. 1.00
01:57:33.000 I'm here to salute cymbals, you fuckheads. 1.00
01:57:36.000 It's not a requirement for NFL players to stand during the singing of the National Anthem. 0.99
01:57:42.000 It's suggested.
01:57:43.000 Oh, really?
01:57:44.000 That they do.
01:57:44.000 It's not a requirement?
01:57:45.000 Right.
01:57:45.000 It's probably constitutional.
01:57:47.000 Probably constitutionally, you can't require somebody to be patriotic.
01:57:51.000 Which is kind of ironic, isn't it?
01:57:53.000 The freedoms that you get in this country.
01:57:57.000 Could they require that of their employees?
01:58:00.000 You could put the American flag on their clothes, maybe.
01:58:03.000 Yeah.
01:58:03.000 Maybe.
01:58:04.000 That's the big team.
01:58:05.000 Put it on the uniform.
01:58:06.000 Big team goes to war.
01:58:07.000 We all get together.
01:58:08.000 It's like people go state.
01:58:11.000 First they go local, like high school team versus high school team.
01:58:15.000 Then they go statewide, where it's like state college versus other colleges.
01:58:20.000 Then they go NFL. And once they go NFL, then it's like state franchises.
01:58:25.000 That's the big league.
01:58:26.000 But the real big league is when all teams get together and they go to armies.
01:58:30.000 Right.
01:58:30.000 And the Army's the biggest big team.
01:58:32.000 And then we go to fuck up other teams. 0.92
01:58:33.000 So it's very important that we keep an active...
01:58:37.000 Organized sports program so that we keep investing in this idea of teams so that we can fuel the big team.
01:58:43.000 Yeah, but the other part of it is if you didn't have the NFL, Pittsburgh would be marching on Cleveland.
01:58:50.000 Right.
01:58:51.000 That is a problem.
01:58:52.000 They would be, right?
01:58:54.000 That's what they were invented for.
01:58:55.000 If you didn't have sport, people would, where are they taking that aggression? 0.86
01:58:58.000 That's true.
01:58:59.000 They'd march across and go after Cleveland.
01:59:01.000 Well, that's how we keep ourselves from going to war inside the country, inside the boundaries.
01:59:06.000 But it doesn't keep us from doing it outside the boundaries.
01:59:09.000 No.
01:59:10.000 There was a whole Radiolab thing about the invention of football, and what it really was was that they had a bunch of men that came back from the war, and they were looking for something to do to alleviate some of the stress.
01:59:20.000 They created football.
01:59:21.000 It's one of the motivations for them creating football in the first place.
01:59:24.000 Makes sense.
01:59:24.000 Totally makes sense.
01:59:25.000 And you need it.
01:59:26.000 You need an outlet.
01:59:28.000 Yeah.
01:59:28.000 Like guys just run around like maniacs?
01:59:31.000 18 minutes long, but here's something I'll let you read.
01:59:34.000 His speech was 18 minutes long?
01:59:36.000 It's him talking in the locker room afterwards because all the reporters were asking him questions and wanted him to explain himself.
01:59:41.000 He says, I'm going to continue to stand with the people that are being oppressed.
01:59:45.000 Kaepernick, that's his name?
01:59:46.000 Yeah.
01:59:47.000 To me, this is something that has to change.
01:59:49.000 When there's significant change and I feel like that flag represents what it's supposed to represent, this country is representing people the way it's supposed to, I'll stand.
01:59:56.000 Huh.
01:59:58.000 Huh.
02:00:00.000 He said, I don't know if I did was right.
02:00:02.000 He said he hasn't heard from the NFL or anybody else about his actions, and it won't matter if he does.
02:00:06.000 No one's tried to quiet me, and to be honest, it's not something I'm going to be quiet about.
02:00:09.000 He said, I'm going to speak the truth when I'm asked about it.
02:00:12.000 This isn't for look.
02:00:13.000 This isn't for publicity or anything like that.
02:00:15.000 This is for people who don't have the voice.
02:00:18.000 And this is for people that are being oppressed that need to have equal opportunities to be successful, to provide for their families, and not live in poor circumstances.
02:00:24.000 Okay, that's a lot. 0.98
02:00:26.000 He's added a bunch of shit there, too. 0.98
02:00:28.000 Yeah, it's important you get your message out in just a phrase. 0.99
02:00:31.000 Yeah, well, also, this is where it gets.
02:00:34.000 People being oppressed that don't have the equal opportunities to be successful, to provide for families and not live in poor circumstances.
02:00:42.000 That's one sentence.
02:00:43.000 The word, to provide for families and not live in poor circumstances is one sentence.
02:00:48.000 Yeah, idealistically, that's interesting.
02:00:50.000 But America's supposed to represent the entire group experiment.
02:00:54.000 You know, this experiment in self-government that's still ongoing.
02:00:57.000 It's not perfect, it's not done, and it's definitely got some dark aspects to it.
02:01:01.000 But if you don't think it's the best thing going, you should go look around.
02:01:05.000 There's some dark parts of America.
02:01:07.000 There's some dark parts about what we were talking about today.
02:01:10.000 I mean, how we were founded.
02:01:11.000 I mean, how this land was acquired in the first place. 1.00
02:01:13.000 It's acquired by fucking murder. 1.00
02:01:15.000 I know. 1.00
02:01:16.000 Do you ever think that when we have problems that maybe it's karma?
02:01:19.000 Well, no, because I don't think it's us.
02:01:20.000 It's not you or I. But there is something incredibly fucked up about a country that is so willing to look at some aspects of our society that are discriminating Or discriminatory, like the article that I pointed out today, 0.95
02:01:37.000 where this woman was writing about how women are drinking because of the patriarchy, because of sexism that's forcing them to drink, and this oppression. 0.99
02:01:44.000 The American Indians were slaughtered! 0.99
02:01:47.000 The Native Americans were fucking slaughtered, and they never come up. 1.00
02:01:51.000 Genocide. 1.00
02:01:52.000 It almost never comes up.
02:01:55.000 When you talk about equal opportunity in America, very few conversations begin with, we've got to do something about the poverty and extreme alcoholism on these Native American reservations. 0.99
02:02:07.000 You know why it doesn't come up?
02:02:09.000 Because we wiped out so many of them, there's just not that many left.
02:02:12.000 Well, there's enough left that they have a voice and they talk, but it's not something that people are concerned with. 0.61
02:02:17.000 I mean, slavery absolutely is fucking awful and is something that we absolutely should pay attention to and we should absolutely look at the impact of slavery over a long period.
02:02:27.000 Like with these people... 0.95
02:02:29.000 Lived as slaves for hundreds of years and then they were finally freed into this area where there's massive amounts of racism.
02:02:35.000 Not just racism like, you know, I like to stick to my own kind, but racism like where people are denigrated in their thought to be like a lesser human being.
02:02:43.000 Yeah, it's systemic.
02:02:44.000 It's systemic and it's deep and then it's going to take hundreds of years, like many generations to get past that, right?
02:02:51.000 And we still definitely haven't gotten past that in a lot of those places.
02:02:54.000 And we concentrate on that and it's a big part of our national discussion. 0.95
02:02:59.000 But it ain't shit compared to what the Native Americans went through. 0.99
02:03:03.000 Slaughtered. 0.99
02:03:04.000 Slaughtered. 0.72
02:03:04.000 And their land just taken. 0.72
02:03:06.000 Just taken.
02:03:07.000 You know, I mean, if you read this article that I read today, I'm sure, first of all, again, this is not taking anything away from the people that suffered from slavery or the genocide that was committed on black people in a lot of areas.
02:03:19.000 We could have two atrocities.
02:03:20.000 Sure, exactly.
02:03:21.000 We can have two that are two big ones.
02:03:23.000 But I feel like it's not that I want less attention being paid on what happened to African Americans.
02:03:29.000 I think there's not enough.
02:03:31.000 But we should have way more than we have right now on Native Americans. 1.00
02:03:37.000 It's fucking crazy. 0.98
02:03:40.000 You know what's a real violation? 0.99
02:03:41.000 You know what felt really dirty when I saw it?
02:03:44.000 I was on my motorcycle and went through the Dakotas and saw the Mount Rushmore.
02:03:51.000 And when you're going, when you're driving through these areas and you're stopping and you're reading about the Native Americans that were there and what they were doing and how many there were, and then to know that all that land was taken and all those, the civilization was killed, and then we carve in the side of the mountain these heads.
02:04:12.000 It's really...
02:04:13.000 It's all white dudes. 0.96
02:04:14.000 We couldn't find a single black guy.
02:04:15.000 I am, you know, I am pretty patriotic to a fault, to like a naive level, but seeing that Mount Rushmore just felt really bad.
02:04:25.000 Look at my phone cover.
02:04:26.000 I like that. 1.00
02:04:26.000 Patriotic as fuck. 1.00
02:04:28.000 But seeing Mount Rushmore was just wrong. 1.00
02:04:30.000 And then there's a guy, there is a Native American carving a crazy horse on the side of a mountain to counter it. 0.99
02:04:37.000 Inside the richest Native American tribe in the U.S. where casino profits pay $1 million a year to every member. 0.59
02:04:43.000 Wow, how many members?
02:04:45.000 It says between the Mystic Lake and the six casinos, travel revenues are thought to be nearly $1.4 billion.
02:04:50.000 So that would mean that there's at least 1,000.
02:04:54.000 There's 460 people in the tribe.
02:04:56.000 They get about $84,000 a month.
02:04:58.000 Each person.
02:04:59.000 There's only 460 of them.
02:05:02.000 That's just this one, in this particular one, outside of Minnesota.
02:05:06.000 That's the reparations.
02:05:08.000 Meanwhile, the ghosts of their ancestors are in the woods every time they go outside to take a leak at night.
02:05:12.000 They just hear screams and see people whisk by them with no heads.
02:05:16.000 It's like, that ain't enough.
02:05:18.000 It's crazy.
02:05:19.000 It's disproportionate for the people that live there, for sure.
02:05:22.000 Has there been any culture...
02:05:25.000 In the world that didn't go in at some level and wipe out the other people to take the land. 0.99
02:05:31.000 I don't think so.
02:05:32.000 I mean, it's pretty...
02:05:34.000 I mean, ours is really...
02:05:35.000 Yeah, but, yeah.
02:05:36.000 Yeah, it's pretty standard.
02:05:38.000 Well, it's what people do. 0.99
02:05:39.000 And it's also super convenient when you don't know what the fuck they're saying. 0.99
02:05:42.000 You know, when you pretend that they're not even one of us. 0.99
02:05:45.000 They're just talking much a gobbledygook. 1.00
02:05:47.000 We're gonna fucking kill them. 1.00
02:05:48.000 Right. 1.00
02:05:48.000 They're sitting on... 1.00
02:05:49.000 Their house is made of gold.
02:05:50.000 Yeah. 0.90
02:05:50.000 Just gonna jack them. 0.90
02:05:52.000 Yeah.
02:05:52.000 It happened everywhere.
02:05:53.000 It's just, I think this is the first time over the last several hundred years, especially the last 200 years since slavery's been abolished, less than 200 years, which is crazy, right?
02:06:05.000 Yeah.
02:06:05.000 1865, you think about that?
02:06:07.000 Insane.
02:06:07.000 That's so recent.
02:06:08.000 Insane.
02:06:08.000 But these last few hundred years of the printed word being distributed, reading becoming more and more common, which is really a very important point.
02:06:19.000 Huge.
02:06:19.000 And up until a hundred or so years ago, it was not that common to be able to read, you know, in a lot of parts of the world.
02:06:27.000 Right.
02:06:27.000 There's a lot of people that are illiterate.
02:06:29.000 So no information.
02:06:30.000 A hundred years before that, super common to be illiterate.
02:06:33.000 Right.
02:06:33.000 I mean, remember, they used to always have that in those cowboy movies.
02:06:36.000 We used to have to write your mark, make your mark on this contract.
02:06:39.000 That's right.
02:06:40.000 Right?
02:06:40.000 Remember, they couldn't write.
02:06:41.000 Yeah, a lot of them couldn't.
02:06:42.000 You know how to write?
02:06:42.000 No, sir.
02:06:43.000 Well, make your mark.
02:06:45.000 Yeah.
02:06:45.000 And they would make a mark.
02:06:45.000 Remember that?
02:06:46.000 Yeah.
02:06:46.000 Or make my little ex.
02:06:48.000 Nobody taught me how to write my name.
02:06:50.000 Yeah.
02:06:52.000 So, what we have in comparison is now you have a phone in your pocket and you can talk to it and he'll answer questions for you.
02:06:59.000 I mean, I was in Seattle this past weekend and I just pressed the button on my phone and I said, Siri, navigate to the SeaTac airport.
02:07:08.000 Right.
02:07:08.000 It goes, here's the directions to the SeaTac Airport.
02:07:11.000 It just starts going.
02:07:12.000 It's amazing.
02:07:12.000 I mean, within seconds.
02:07:13.000 I know.
02:07:14.000 The amount of access to the information that you need to sort of form your view of the world accurately is just so much different now than it's ever been before.
02:07:24.000 So now I think we're looking at what happened to the Native Americans, or looking at what happened to the slaves, or looking at what happened to this whole Columbus Day thing.
02:07:33.000 They're just now starting to decide that they're not going to call it Columbus Day anymore.
02:07:36.000 They're going to call it Native American Appreciation Day or something like that.
02:07:39.000 Right, yeah.
02:07:40.000 Gee, about time.
02:07:41.000 I know.
02:07:42.000 But I have to say, as an Italian that grew up in New Jersey, I hate to see that one go.
02:07:46.000 First of all, I don't trust him.
02:07:48.000 He's not a real Italian. 1.00
02:07:49.000 He's like me.
02:07:50.000 He doesn't have a vowel as a last name.
02:07:52.000 Papa!
02:07:53.000 How come it's not Columbus? 1.00
02:07:55.000 What's the S, bitch? 1.00
02:07:56.000 What's with the S? Yeah, you're a good point. 1.00
02:07:58.000 At Brown University, Columbus Day is now Indigenous Peoples Day.
02:08:01.000 It's right after White Privilege Day.
02:08:04.000 It's weird.
02:08:05.000 It's like they have White Privilege Day.
02:08:07.000 Did you see what Chicago did?
02:08:09.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:08:10.000 Chicago University said, fuck you. 1.00
02:08:13.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:08:13.000 Fuck you, safe spaces. 1.00
02:08:15.000 Trigger. 1.00
02:08:15.000 Yeah, fuck you, trigger warnings. 1.00
02:08:17.000 You little fucking babies. 1.00
02:08:19.000 Deal with the world. 1.00
02:08:20.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:08:21.000 Well, they watched enough YouTube videos, they gathered the information, like a good institute of learning, and they go, oh, the date is in, and you guys are retarded. 0.97
02:08:28.000 Yeah. 0.95
02:08:29.000 You guys are closing down free thought and discussion in the place where it's supposed to foster.
02:08:35.000 Exactly.
02:08:35.000 Yeah, you're not just stopping racism, which would be a wonderful thing to do.
02:08:40.000 What you're doing is you're controlling the way people address ideas, the way they behave and think, and you're creating words that are dangerous, like that were normal, like words that you used to be able to use with no problems.
02:08:53.000 Now they're demanding things like, you know, don't call someone a spokesman, call them spokeswomen.
02:08:58.000 There's no more fresh man, there's first year students.
02:09:00.000 Like there's a whole list of them that, I forget what university put it out, but...
02:09:05.000 Dave Rubin put it up the other day.
02:09:08.000 Some university that made this new list of all the things that would not be tolerated anymore in the nomenclature.
02:09:17.000 All man stuff.
02:09:18.000 Word speak.
02:09:18.000 It's called word speak.
02:09:19.000 They saw it coming.
02:09:21.000 Mankind.
02:09:22.000 How come it's okay, how come you can't be, how come a human could be a man or a woman, but mankind, we assume that means male, or it's a masculine sort of a, like, woman is in that too.
02:09:36.000 Mankind, woman. 0.93
02:09:37.000 It's a special kind of man.
02:09:39.000 Good point.
02:09:39.000 It's like man that makes babies.
02:09:41.000 It's like it is a man.
02:09:42.000 Yeah.
02:09:42.000 It's human.
02:09:43.000 Part of these creatures that came out of Tanzania. 1.00
02:09:45.000 Why are we so goddamn fucking sensitive? 0.99
02:09:47.000 And I wonder if I would think that way if I was a woman. 0.99
02:09:49.000 If I was a woman, maybe I'm fucking tired of being a freshman. 1.00
02:09:52.000 I'm not a man, piece of shit. 1.00
02:09:54.000 I'm a girl who's a first year student, you cunt face. 1.00
02:09:58.000 I'm not a fucking freshman. 1.00
02:10:00.000 What year are you in, Sally? 0.99
02:10:01.000 Oh, I'm a freshman.
02:10:02.000 You don't look like a man. 1.00
02:10:04.000 You stupid bitch. 1.00
02:10:10.000 Living with all women... 1.00
02:10:11.000 I'm sorry.
02:10:13.000 Living with all women as we do, you get an idea around the house of what's... 0.91
02:10:19.000 Truly like something that they would carry as an offense and what wouldn't.
02:10:23.000 Well, you also get a sense of how they feed off each other and convince each other what they're saying makes sense.
02:10:28.000 That's a part of the problem.
02:10:30.000 Right.
02:10:30.000 Yeah, I agree.
02:10:31.000 Nail polish should be mandatory. 0.98
02:10:33.000 And the next thing you know, they're fucking passing laws. 0.99
02:10:37.000 When do you get this broad, this Clinton broad in office with all their fucking wanky medication she's on? 1.00
02:10:45.000 Who knows if she's even seeing straight, bro? 0.99
02:10:48.000 Dude, it'll work out perfect because the VP's a dude.
02:10:52.000 Here's a perfect example of people writing for, like a lot of different people write for publications.
02:10:57.000 HuffPost, they banned two of David Seaman, our boy David Seaman.
02:11:02.000 They banned two of his articles and suspended his account.
02:11:05.000 Why?
02:11:05.000 Because he wrote articles questioning Hillary Clinton's health.
02:11:08.000 Is that true?
02:11:10.000 Yep.
02:11:10.000 Which is also the same reason why Dr. Drew's show got canceled.
02:11:13.000 That's what they say.
02:11:14.000 Because Dr. Drew, he was questioning Hillary Clinton's health.
02:11:18.000 Now, what I've heard about Dr. Drew from actual doctors in regards to what he said, they didn't agree with some of the things he said.
02:11:27.000 One of the things that he said about armor thyroid, he said armor thyroid hasn't been prescribed.
02:11:34.000 I haven't heard about it being prescribed since the 1970s.
02:11:38.000 I'm on Armour Thyroid, and I've been on Armour Thyroid for about 10 years.
02:11:43.000 What's it do? 1.00
02:11:43.000 He's out of his fucking mind when it comes to that. 1.00
02:11:46.000 It is for hypothyroidism. 1.00
02:11:47.000 I have something called Hashimoto's.
02:11:49.000 It's a thyroid disease.
02:11:53.000 No, it's not.
02:11:54.000 It sounds like it, though.
02:11:55.000 It's a thyroid disease that is an autoimmune disease that's hereditary.
02:12:00.000 My mom has it, my sister has it, and I have it too.
02:12:04.000 And your thyroid doesn't work so well.
02:12:06.000 And for me, it manifests itself in headaches.
02:12:09.000 I was taking this thing called Synthroid, and it didn't work as good.
02:12:12.000 It worked okay.
02:12:13.000 It was definitely better than nothing.
02:12:15.000 Yeah.
02:12:15.000 But then when I got on this Armour Thyroid, Armour Thyroid is thyroid medication that's been made from pig's glands.
02:12:21.000 Oh.
02:12:22.000 And it's very biosimilar or bioidentical to the actual hormone, so it's very clean and easy.
02:12:30.000 Oh, wow.
02:12:31.000 My body has zero problems with it.
02:12:32.000 It really is effective.
02:12:34.000 Yeah.
02:12:35.000 So I've been on this for 10 years, and my doctor is one of the best hormone doctors in all of the country.
02:12:43.000 Yeah?
02:12:43.000 Yeah.
02:12:44.000 He should meet my wife. 1.00
02:12:46.000 He'll just shoot her. 1.00
02:12:47.000 He'll say we can't fix this one. 0.99
02:12:49.000 But, I mean, my point is, this guy's a state-of-the-art doctor.
02:12:53.000 And also, I've told people about it that had a problem with Synthroid, and they got on it and then thanked me so much because the Armour thyroid works so much better for them.
02:13:03.000 So I didn't know why Dr. Drew said that.
02:13:05.000 Because he said that Hillary Clinton had a thyroid problem, but he thought it was weird they were prescribing Armour thyroid.
02:13:09.000 It's very common.
02:13:10.000 There's a reason why they still make it. 1.00
02:13:12.000 And he should know, more than anyone, being a fucking doctor... 0.99
02:13:16.000 Is he a real doctor? 0.99
02:13:17.000 That people are not bio-identical.
02:13:18.000 Right.
02:13:19.000 Whereas you have one person is allergic to peanuts, another person can't be around cats.
02:13:24.000 Right.
02:13:24.000 You know, one person responds very well to certain medication.
02:13:27.000 Other people are like, Jamie, Jamie can eat pot and nothing happens to him.
02:13:30.000 So weird. 1.00
02:13:30.000 He's a fucking weirdo. 1.00
02:13:31.000 But the point being, if I ate what Jamie ate, I'd be curled up in a fetal position calling girls I dated in high school, going, I'm sorry, I don't know what the fuck it's been so long, but I still feel bad. 1.00
02:13:42.000 You know what I mean? 0.94
02:13:43.000 We're all very different.
02:13:44.000 Why do you think he doesn't understand that?
02:13:46.000 Well, hold on.
02:13:47.000 Let me keep going.
02:13:47.000 I'm sorry.
02:13:48.000 Because my point is, people that I know that are doctors said that what he did was essentially malpractice.
02:13:52.000 You're not supposed to do that.
02:13:54.000 You're not supposed to diagnose someone without any personal understanding of their case.
02:13:58.000 You haven't talked to them.
02:13:59.000 You haven't studied their blood work.
02:14:01.000 You're not privy to their inside information about their health, how they feel.
02:14:04.000 You're taking this guess based on what's been released.
02:14:08.000 And on top of that, you're doing it kind of to get publicity and attention.
02:14:13.000 Kind of?
02:14:14.000 Yeah.
02:14:14.000 I mean, that's essentially what you're doing.
02:14:15.000 If he did it in a respectful way where he was speculating, where he said, well, I don't know about the specifics of Hillary... 0.86
02:14:22.000 This is how I would handle it, me being a doctor.
02:14:25.000 I would say, I don't know about the specifics of Hillary Clinton's case, but I do know, here's what can be problematic about brain injuries similar to the one that she apparently suffered.
02:14:36.000 Here could be some issues.
02:14:38.000 And this is what some people experience from brain issues.
02:14:41.000 If you say something like that, that is a doctor talking about a non-specific person.
02:14:46.000 You're not talking about a specific person.
02:14:48.000 You're talking about like, say if Tom Papa breaks his leg and Dr. Drew reads about it.
02:14:52.000 Tom Papa was riding a motorcycle in Africa and broke his leg.
02:14:55.000 Well, here's what happens when your leg breaks.
02:14:57.000 And when people break their legs, your body has to heal it, and here's some of the complications that come along with that.
02:15:01.000 Now, if he did that, that would be a doctor on television informing us about some real issues.
02:15:08.000 Maybe he thought as a voter and as an American, as someone who's genuinely concerned knowing what he does know, maybe he felt like he had to speak out about the dangers of someone who's had a traumatic brain injury having a position like being the president,
02:15:24.000 what could be a problem, and then he looked at a medication list and he disagreed with it, which doctors will disagree with.
02:15:29.000 I've talked to some doctors, they'll say, like we were talking about the bulging disc issue.
02:15:33.000 I talked to one doctor who wanted me to get an operation.
02:15:35.000 Oh, you're going to have to get that cut out.
02:15:36.000 It's not going to get any better.
02:15:37.000 And he's convinced.
02:15:38.000 Clearly he was wrong.
02:15:39.000 Right.
02:15:39.000 Because it got better.
02:15:40.000 But he really... 0.95
02:15:41.000 He didn't know shit about Regenikine. 0.97
02:15:42.000 He had never heard of it. 0.94
02:15:43.000 He didn't want...
02:15:44.000 He's like, well, I wouldn't put any of my eggs in that basket.
02:15:46.000 I mean, it's just...
02:15:47.000 There's no research.
02:15:48.000 There's a reason why it hasn't been approved yet by the FDA. No, no, no, no.
02:15:51.000 There isn't, you fucking dunce. 1.00
02:15:53.000 And it works. 1.00
02:15:54.000 See, people are wrong all the time.
02:15:56.000 All the time.
02:15:56.000 So, according to my friend who's a doctor, he said, you're never supposed to do that.
02:16:01.000 And what he did by diagnosing her publicly like that, you just don't do it.
02:16:05.000 So if that's true, then they're probably justified in canning him, right?
02:16:10.000 So would you say that that kind of eliminates the idea that it's a conspiracy? 1.00
02:16:15.000 I'd say he's lucky he's alive, because she just kills bitches. 1.00
02:16:19.000 That's what I hear. 1.00
02:16:20.000 Hillary's just out there whacking fools. 1.00
02:16:22.000 I mean, if you pay attention to the same websites that will tell you about chemtrails in the flat earth, which are the ones that are truth, hashtag truth, they'll tell you she's whacked like a hundred people. 0.99
02:16:33.000 Wow.
02:16:34.000 She's like Seagal, like a lighter Seagal. 0.53
02:16:37.000 Do you not know this?
02:16:38.000 Do you not know about this for real?
02:16:39.000 I really don't.
02:16:40.000 Oh, okay.
02:16:40.000 There is at least 48 or 49 people that have had dealings with the Clintons who've been mysteriously murdered, including the guy who released all those emails about the DNC, favoring Hillary over...
02:16:53.000 He released them to WikiLeaks, favoring Hillary over Bernie. 1.00
02:16:57.000 Remember that?
02:16:58.000 Yeah.
02:16:58.000 Well, that guy got shot at 4 o'clock in the morning in front of his house, in the back.
02:17:03.000 Murdered.
02:17:03.000 When?
02:17:04.000 Like this summer?
02:17:04.000 Really recently.
02:17:05.000 Yeah, like really recently.
02:17:06.000 And he's one of several people who's been murdered that had ties to the Clintons.
02:17:11.000 What?
02:17:11.000 Clinton body count or left-wing conspiracy.
02:17:14.000 Three with ties to the DNC mysteriously die.
02:17:17.000 Yeah.
02:17:18.000 Yeah, dude, this is not a joke.
02:17:20.000 People die all the time.
02:17:21.000 They do die all the time.
02:17:23.000 And here's the thing, you're not saying that she killed them either.
02:17:26.000 Right.
02:17:27.000 But here's what you do need to know.
02:17:28.000 This is what's really important to consider. 0.95
02:17:31.000 You're talking about, when you're talking about someone like the Clintons, especially if you talk- stop for a second, you're confusing the shit out of me. 0.52
02:17:37.000 If you're talking about, he just keeps clicking on links.
02:17:41.000 How about that story?
02:17:42.000 What's going on over here?
02:17:43.000 What about I click this?
02:17:44.000 When you're talking about someone like the Clintons who run the Clinton Foundation, I don't know if you paid attention to the Clinton Foundation, but I have been slowly but surely going down a rabbit hole with the Clinton Foundation over the last couple of months.
02:17:57.000 And it is crazy what they got away with.
02:18:00.000 It's crazy.
02:18:01.000 And there's some pretty direct evidence.
02:18:03.000 There's some people that were involved, and they donated to the Clinton Foundation, and they got arms deals. 0.98
02:18:08.000 Now, whether or not they got arms deals because they donated, or whether they did that as a thank you for the arms deal that they would have had anyway, who the fuck knows? 0.94
02:18:17.000 But that's just one aspect of what's problematic about this. 0.98
02:18:20.000 I'm no expert, and I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. 0.84
02:18:23.000 Let me just state that for a fact. 0.92
02:18:25.000 But what I've been reading about what people find problematic about the amount of profit that's been made off of this, and the amount of influence that is being sold with this, and that how many of these people that they're involved with in these dealings are donating to their foundation,
02:18:42.000 and then in return they're getting these deals passed. 0.99
02:18:46.000 It is shady as fuck, okay? 0.98
02:18:49.000 And the people that you're dealing with, in some instances, you're talking about weapons. 0.99
02:18:54.000 Bad people.
02:18:54.000 You're talking about arms dealers, you're talking about countries that kill people, countries with poor civil rights records, like Saudi Arabia.
02:19:02.000 You're talking about decisions that you make, you fucking know for sure people are gonna die, right? 0.99
02:19:08.000 And we know that about her. 0.98
02:19:09.000 That's just what, look, that video of her laughing about the death of Muammar Gaddafi, You ever see that?
02:19:16.000 Yeah.
02:19:16.000 Interview, she's like, we came, we saw, he died!
02:19:19.000 Right.
02:19:21.000 Like, whoa!
02:19:23.000 The fact that the bar for being a president is so low that you could have a video like that out there, and it doesn't freak people the fuck out, and have everybody back off. 0.98
02:19:31.000 And then, on top of that, with all the evidence of all this weird shit that is probably just standard operational procedure. 0.96
02:19:38.000 So, here's my point. 0.96
02:19:39.000 You're involved with this interconnected web of Death of killers, of war, of tough questions that demand tough solutions.
02:19:51.000 And then you're involved with all these people that are used to killing people, right?
02:19:55.000 Now, if something like this DNC leak comes out, and it's possible that this could bring down a ship, and this ship is huge, and there's thousands of people involved in this ship, and you might be one of those people involved in this ship.
02:20:07.000 You might be like, I think I know how to take care of this.
02:20:09.000 And you step in, and someone dies, and everybody else shuts the fuck up, and everybody panics, and nobody gets caught.
02:20:16.000 And there's no ties to Hillary, because Hillary didn't ask for it to be done. 1.00
02:20:21.000 She's a part of a fucking giant machine. 0.98
02:20:24.000 So it might not even be that she's out there doing it, but it might be the fact that you're talking about... 0.99
02:20:28.000 People will benefit from her influence.
02:20:30.000 Political power.
02:20:31.000 You're talking about the presidency of the United States of America.
02:20:35.000 You're talking about a gigantic...
02:20:37.000 Amount of the world that that controls.
02:20:40.000 Right.
02:20:41.000 And she's in there.
02:20:42.000 Right.
02:20:44.000 Hasn't every president?
02:20:45.000 Most likely.
02:20:46.000 Hasn't every leader of whatever?
02:20:49.000 Sure.
02:20:49.000 It's the job.
02:20:50.000 It's part of the job.
02:20:51.000 That's the thing that I keep...
02:20:53.000 What's us?
02:20:54.000 What are you showing us?
02:20:54.000 This is one of the three guys that they were talking about that just recently died.
02:20:58.000 Okay.
02:20:58.000 Former President of the United Nations General Assembly John Ash mysteriously passed away on June 22nd, a few days before he was scheduled to begin pretrial meetings involving shady financial dealings regarding a former Clinton crony.
02:21:09.000 Local police officers said he died from dropping a barbell on his throat while working out.
02:21:14.000 But the UN oddly first claimed he died of a heart attack.
02:21:19.000 The 61-year-old was supposed to testify against Chinese real estate developer... 1.00
02:21:23.000 Oh God, he's dead as fuck. 0.99
02:21:24.000 ...Nig Lapsang, who was implicated in the China-gate scandal for funneling money to the DNC for Bill Clinton through Arkansas restaurant owner Charlie Try. 1.00
02:21:35.000 Ash was arrested last year for allegedly taking over $3 million in bribes from the Chinese businessman, including...
02:21:41.000 Over a half a million from Nengalapsi in exchange for building a United Nations Conference Center in Macau.
02:21:49.000 There's a lot in there.
02:21:50.000 Whoa.
02:21:51.000 And he was arrested.
02:21:52.000 So he was arrested for taking...
02:21:54.000 Three million bucks in bribes, and then he was going to testify.
02:21:56.000 He was going to spill the beans, and they killed him. 1.00
02:22:00.000 Like a fucking... 1.00
02:22:01.000 Like a movie. 1.00
02:22:03.000 What's that source?
02:22:05.000 The website's townhall.com.
02:22:09.000 What's townhall.com?
02:22:11.000 Well, the information, I'm sure, is not made up.
02:22:13.000 We should just Google his death and find out.
02:22:17.000 Clinton body count or left-wing conspiracy three with ties.
02:22:21.000 That's just one article and one website.
02:22:24.000 The facts of these people dying is undeniable.
02:22:27.000 They've definitely...
02:22:37.000 Right. 1.00
02:22:39.000 Fuck it, man. 1.00
02:22:48.000 The staffer who dropped off the lawsuit, I believe is who it was, who filed the lawsuit in August or maybe in July. 1.00
02:22:57.000 He was dead in August.
02:22:58.000 He was found dead in his bathroom.
02:23:00.000 What lawsuit?
02:23:01.000 Again, for the DNC. Again, for Bernie Sanders or something like that, I believe.
02:23:05.000 So he was killed too, along with the kid who released the documents.
02:23:09.000 They think he probably did it.
02:23:11.000 They don't know if he for sure did it, but he was an analyst that had access to that information.
02:23:16.000 They believe it was him and he was murdered.
02:23:17.000 Look, they're killing people. 0.69
02:23:19.000 Everyone's killing people, right?
02:23:20.000 I mean...
02:23:21.000 I'm not.
02:23:21.000 Are you?
02:23:22.000 I can't.
02:23:24.000 Are we on?
02:23:24.000 Well, the Sultan of Sourdough occasionally has to make dirty moves.
02:23:30.000 Think about what people do for just...
02:23:32.000 A small amount of money, right?
02:23:34.000 The horrible things people do to other people for small amounts of money.
02:23:38.000 When you get up to that level of billions of government-sized money, come on!
02:23:47.000 Right?
02:23:48.000 You see all the accusations against Putin over the weekend?
02:23:51.000 How, like, all those people are dying?
02:23:53.000 Killed a reporter just yesterday.
02:23:55.000 Yesterday?
02:23:55.000 Yesterday a guy got shot in the head.
02:23:56.000 The guy was critical of Putin. 0.65
02:23:58.000 Suicide!
02:23:58.000 Yeah.
02:23:59.000 Yeah.
02:23:59.000 Definitely suicided himself.
02:24:01.000 What the fuck, man? 1.00
02:24:02.000 It's scary up there. 1.00
02:24:04.000 It's really scary up there.
02:24:05.000 Did you see that video that a guy took, a surveillance camera, this millionaire who's having some, or billionaire I guess, who is having some big dispute with his girlfriend.
02:24:15.000 He broke up with her and so she allegedly beat him up. 1.00
02:24:18.000 She wants money and he has surveillance video of her lying on the bed punching herself in the face.
02:24:24.000 No!
02:24:26.000 That's great.
02:24:27.000 Yeah, I tweeted it today.
02:24:28.000 You did?
02:24:29.000 It's wonderful.
02:24:30.000 You know what's wonderful?
02:24:31.000 Listen, folks, it's not an us or them thing.
02:24:33.000 We have to stop this.
02:24:35.000 There's a thing that women do whenever a woman is involved in any sort of a domestic violence, abuse, rape type situation. 1.00
02:24:42.000 There's a thing that women automatically do. 1.00
02:24:45.000 Where they think that that woman is not guilty.
02:24:46.000 And that woman has been abused. 1.00
02:24:49.000 And that woman is definitely not lying. 1.00
02:24:50.000 And most of the time, you're right. 1.00
02:24:53.000 But there are a lot of fucking liars out there. 1.00
02:24:55.000 And some of them have penises. 1.00
02:24:57.000 And some of them have vaginas. 1.00
02:24:58.000 And this is something, as human beings, we have to stop being on these fucking gender-based teams. 1.00
02:25:05.000 It's stupid. 1.00
02:25:06.000 Because there are nutty bitches out there. 1.00
02:25:08.000 And some of them are men. 1.00
02:25:10.000 And some of them are women. 1.00
02:25:11.000 And this woman is just sitting there. 1.00
02:25:14.000 There's a video of her. 0.93
02:25:14.000 Hitting herself in the face. 0.93
02:25:16.000 Hitting herself in the face. 0.97
02:25:18.000 Screaming and yelling and wailing herself in the face. 0.96
02:25:22.000 Look at her. 1.00
02:25:23.000 She's fucking bananas, man. 1.00
02:25:25.000 Oh my god. 1.00
02:25:26.000 Yeah, so she gives herself marks all over her face and then she calls the cops. 1.00
02:25:30.000 And she's having a temper tantrum and storming around and she doesn't realize that she's being filmed. 1.00
02:25:35.000 That's crazy.
02:25:36.000 Yeah, but meanwhile, I don't even know how much of this is admissible. 1.00
02:25:38.000 Look, she's fucking hitting herself in the face so hard. 1.00
02:25:41.000 I don't know how much of this is admissible in court, in divorce court. 0.99
02:25:45.000 I don't know.
02:25:46.000 Or in, well, not even divorce court, but...
02:25:49.000 If he's being prosecuted for hitting her, right?
02:25:52.000 Yeah, it was his fiancée.
02:25:54.000 But, you know, this is what everybody said...
02:25:57.000 I mean, there's been a lot of these cases, and this is what Johnny Depp is claiming happened, where his ex-girlfriend was saying that he beat her up, and he said he didn't do it, and she must have did it to herself or faked it or something like that.
02:26:08.000 How did that end up?
02:26:09.000 Who knows?
02:26:10.000 They're still disputing it.
02:26:11.000 She's suing Doug Stanhope.
02:26:13.000 She is? 0.92
02:26:14.000 Doug Stanhope?
02:26:14.000 Oh, because he defended him?
02:26:15.000 Doug Stanhope wrote an article saying that he knows that she's a liar and that she was blackmailing him and that Johnny Depp had told him about it before any of this came out, that she had some demands.
02:26:25.000 I don't know who's telling the truth.
02:26:27.000 I don't know if Doug really knows.
02:26:28.000 I don't know. 0.99
02:26:29.000 Who the fuck knows? 0.99
02:26:30.000 I wasn't there. 0.99
02:26:31.000 But here's the thing, man. 1.00
02:26:32.000 There are people like that nutty bitch that you just saw in that video hitting herself in the face. 1.00
02:26:36.000 There's people like that. 1.00
02:26:37.000 They're real people.
02:26:38.000 That's crazy. 1.00
02:26:39.000 They have vaginas. 1.00
02:26:40.000 And some of them have penises. 1.00
02:26:41.000 It's not men or women. 0.99
02:26:44.000 No one's infallible.
02:26:45.000 We gotta get off these teams.
02:26:47.000 Because this is a real problem.
02:26:48.000 This is very divisive.
02:26:49.000 It really separates people.
02:26:51.000 This idea that anytime a woman accuses a man of something, it must be true. 1.00
02:26:56.000 It's not true.
02:26:57.000 It's not right.
02:26:58.000 We have to be sure. 0.94
02:26:59.000 And I don't know how to do that, but I don't think the way to do that is to automatically assume that even shady bitches are all telling the truth, always. 1.00
02:27:07.000 And then every woman who's accusing a man of something, without a doubt, can't be lying. 0.95
02:27:11.000 That's crazy.
02:27:12.000 It's case by case.
02:27:13.000 Everybody's completely different.
02:27:15.000 And again, you don't want to blame the victim. 0.99
02:27:18.000 If someone is a victim and you go around and you say, I don't believe a fucking word you're saying. 0.95
02:27:23.000 And meanwhile, that actually did happen to them. 0.99
02:27:24.000 That's horrible.
02:27:25.000 Brutal.
02:27:26.000 But we have to be able to figure out what is what.
02:27:28.000 Yeah.
02:27:29.000 It's hard to not come up with a generalization in these cases.
02:27:33.000 That's...
02:27:35.000 If there's some way that you can get the people that are dealing with these situations to break through that barrier and look at everything as a case-by-case basis, I don't know how you do it.
02:27:44.000 We don't have enough knowledge of whether or not a person is being truthful.
02:27:48.000 And there's also an issue where people in their own minds change reality.
02:27:52.000 Like, you can have an argument with someone and they can decide in their own mind over the course of whatever weeks have passed that that argument was a completely different beast than what was happening while it was going down.
02:28:03.000 Your ego lies to you.
02:28:05.000 You start telling the story to other people with distortions.
02:28:08.000 Those distortions become a part of the reality.
02:28:10.000 Yeah.
02:28:10.000 It becomes the narrative.
02:28:11.000 It gets more and more exaggerated every time you talk about it.
02:28:15.000 It becomes real.
02:28:15.000 It becomes real.
02:28:16.000 Yeah.
02:28:17.000 Most people, it's really hard for them to accurately and objectively talk about a very traumatic situation.
02:28:25.000 Yeah.
02:28:27.000 Right.
02:28:28.000 And you're a woman, and you're engaged to this guy, and he really did beat you up. 1.00
02:28:30.000 Like, fuck. 1.00
02:28:31.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:28:32.000 Like, just trying to relay that accurately has got to be terrifying and bizarre.
02:28:36.000 Oh, completely.
02:28:37.000 Yeah.
02:28:38.000 Out of your mind.
02:28:38.000 Yeah.
02:28:39.000 And then you've got to parse these tiny little details about it.
02:28:42.000 How much is this dude laughing?
02:28:44.000 This dude has this video right now, though.
02:28:46.000 That is crazy. 0.99
02:28:46.000 Like, when he saw it, when he knew he had it, he's like, oh, fuck yeah! 0.99
02:28:52.000 Woo! 0.99
02:28:53.000 And that's the thing.
02:28:53.000 She'll rationalize that.
02:28:55.000 I don't know about that.
02:28:57.000 She'll rationalize it.
02:28:58.000 She'll be like, yeah, I just never caught him in the act.
02:29:01.000 So, you know, who knows what she'll do?
02:29:02.000 But she's crazy enough where she will have a working system in her head of why that's okay. 1.00
02:29:08.000 Well, this is also what you get when women fuck guys for their money. 1.00
02:29:12.000 You get people who are mad. 1.00
02:29:13.000 Like, if you want to fucking a guy for his money, say if you're an attractive woman like this girl is, and the guys are... 1.00
02:29:18.000 But she could probably do better. 1.00
02:29:20.000 You know, she's beautiful.
02:29:22.000 You get mad at that.
02:29:23.000 Right.
02:29:24.000 You're powerless. 1.00
02:29:25.000 Never fuck over your head. 1.00
02:29:26.000 Right. 1.00
02:29:28.000 You're right.
02:29:28.000 Just stay within your means.
02:29:30.000 Yeah, know what you're dealing with.
02:29:32.000 Because if people are not really attracted to you, man, it gets ugly.
02:29:36.000 It gets ugly.
02:29:38.000 It gets ugly.
02:29:38.000 It's true.
02:29:39.000 It's not good.
02:29:40.000 You know, everybody has this idea they gotta get a supermodel. 0.99
02:29:42.000 It's the dumbest move. 0.98
02:29:44.000 Don't do it. 1.00
02:29:44.000 Are you nuts? 1.00
02:29:45.000 Don't do it. 1.00
02:29:46.000 Don't fuck over your head. 1.00
02:29:47.000 Because you have to pay. 1.00
02:29:48.000 There's a deficit.
02:29:49.000 It's like buying a Corvette when you're still in college, but you got the student loan.
02:29:52.000 I'm gonna spend it on the car.
02:29:54.000 I'm crazy.
02:29:54.000 Bob bought a Corvette.
02:29:55.000 Get the fuck out of here! 1.00
02:29:56.000 And you go outside, and this fucking guy's like, I'm gonna start delivering Domino's, and I'm gonna pay this car off, bro. 1.00
02:30:03.000 I like driving a car. 0.99
02:30:04.000 I have pride. 1.00
02:30:06.000 That's what a guy's doing if he takes a super hot wife, if he's a fucking fat, ugly, rich guy. 1.00
02:30:10.000 Crazy. 1.00
02:30:11.000 You have to know if that's what you're getting. 0.60
02:30:13.000 Now you're competing with everyone who wants to sleep with that.
02:30:15.000 And that is a supermodel. 1.00
02:30:17.000 Just genetically, you've now increased the number of other alpha males coming for this person.
02:30:22.000 Plus, I think a good move is to always go foreign. 1.00
02:30:25.000 That's how I feel about sports cars, and that's how I feel about trophy bribes.
02:30:30.000 If you're going to get a trophy bride, get one from some war-torn region of the world.
02:30:34.000 She don't know no better. 0.97
02:30:35.000 She's just happy.
02:30:36.000 She's got food. 0.96
02:30:37.000 She genuinely loves you for taking care of her.
02:30:40.000 She's so psyched.
02:30:41.000 And if you move her family out of the ramshackle village that the Jews are about to plow down... 1.00
02:30:47.000 He can move her whole family out.
02:30:48.000 Bring her family.
02:30:49.000 You guys will have a wonderful relationship based on actual appreciation.
02:30:53.000 They just like running water. 1.00
02:30:54.000 Yeah, but if you date some blonde in Florida with big tits and she does coke. 1.00
02:30:58.000 Who's come up through the minors. 1.00
02:31:00.000 She knows she doesn't want to fuck you. 1.00
02:31:02.000 You and your mediocre dick. 1.00
02:31:04.000 She's not into it. 1.00
02:31:05.000 She's been studying how to get this done her whole life. 0.99
02:31:08.000 She's trying to think of how the fuck she can close this deal and make the big money. 1.00
02:31:11.000 And right when she was at the fucking finish line, you cut it off. 0.99
02:31:15.000 That's what happened. 0.99
02:31:16.000 He broke up with the fiance.
02:31:18.000 So she's like, there's gotta be a way to make money out of this deal! 0.99
02:31:23.000 Bang, bang, bang! 1.00
02:31:24.000 She's just, she's just going, she's fucking throwing a Hail Mary. 1.00
02:31:28.000 Well they have whole clinics like that for young athletes, right? 0.99
02:31:31.000 That there's, it's a business.
02:31:33.000 Do they?
02:31:34.000 Yeah, it's a business for women to come after these young athletes and get pregnant and do all these things. 1.00
02:31:39.000 They literally are counseled that this is one of the threats to your life.
02:31:42.000 Yeah.
02:31:43.000 Well, definitely to your livelihood.
02:31:44.000 Yeah.
02:31:45.000 Yeah.
02:31:45.000 Well, it's real.
02:31:46.000 And look, it's also...
02:31:49.000 It makes sense.
02:31:51.000 Because there's an imbalance, all right?
02:31:53.000 It's power.
02:31:53.000 Yeah, if you're like some...
02:31:55.000 Baller rich dude who's worth billions of dollars.
02:31:58.000 You got private jets.
02:31:59.000 You're pulling up everywhere in a Rolls Royce.
02:32:01.000 People open the door for you and you walk out with your sunglasses.
02:32:03.000 Walk straight to your private jet.
02:32:05.000 Oh my god.
02:32:06.000 This is just like me this week. 0.52
02:32:07.000 Yeah, he's so unattainable and the resources are so ridiculous that people are in some way, some strange way attracted to him, right?
02:32:14.000 Everyone around is like, Mr. Papa's coming, Mr. Papa's coming.
02:32:17.000 When you see Mr. Papa, don't make eye contact with Mr. Papa.
02:32:20.000 If he talks to you, be polite and be egregious.
02:32:24.000 But whatever you do, don't ask Mr. Papa for money.
02:32:26.000 That's Mr. Papa right there.
02:32:28.000 Mr. Papa's here.
02:32:28.000 Mr. Papa's here.
02:32:29.000 Hi, everybody.
02:32:30.000 How are you?
02:32:30.000 And you just get the best of the best out of these people.
02:32:32.000 And they think of you as like, wow, if I could just get close to Mr. Papa, my whole world would change.
02:32:37.000 And it makes sense because everybody's trying to be nice to you.
02:32:39.000 Right.
02:32:40.000 Which is like weird, right?
02:32:41.000 Total weirdness.
02:32:42.000 It's weird. 0.99
02:32:42.000 If you're some super billionaire Richard Branson type character, everywhere you go, everybody's kissing your ass and trying to be nice to you. 0.99
02:32:49.000 You get this really distorted version of humans. 0.99
02:32:51.000 Yeah.
02:32:51.000 And women are attracted to you that shouldn't be attracted to you.
02:32:54.000 That's right.
02:32:55.000 It's natural.
02:32:55.000 But you think they should be attracted to you.
02:32:57.000 You should think They should. 1.00
02:32:58.000 And they get to fuck you and they get to smell you and realize what you really are and who you really are. 1.00
02:33:03.000 Like, ew. 1.00
02:33:04.000 I need to get this guy to fucking pay me. 1.00
02:33:07.000 This guy's terrible. 1.00
02:33:08.000 Get mad. 1.00
02:33:08.000 Where's my Ferrari, stupid? 1.00
02:33:10.000 You know? 1.00
02:33:10.000 How come I don't have a villa? 1.00
02:33:12.000 And then next thing you know, you get this guy buying you shit. 1.00
02:33:15.000 And other women are coming after him, so he's probably with them. 1.00
02:33:17.000 Yeah.
02:33:18.000 And along the way, they're mad.
02:33:19.000 The girls are mad. 0.99
02:33:20.000 Like that Donald Sterling girl. 1.00
02:33:22.000 The girl who recorded Donald Sterling saying all that racist shit? 1.00
02:33:24.000 He bought her a Bentley, a Ferrari, a fat condo. 1.00
02:33:29.000 He bought her a gang of shit. 1.00
02:33:30.000 And she was like, not enough. 1.00
02:33:32.000 Not enough, you fucking disgusting bag of meat. 1.00
02:33:37.000 You old leather saddlebag filled with rotten hamburger. 1.00
02:33:42.000 Fuck you. 1.00
02:33:43.000 I can't believe I sucked your dick. 1.00
02:33:45.000 Pay me, motherfucker. 1.00
02:33:47.000 Pay me. 1.00
02:33:49.000 What do you think, honey? 0.97
02:33:50.000 What do you think of black people? 1.00
02:33:53.000 I don't like it when they fuck you. 1.00
02:33:55.000 Wait, wait, hold on. 1.00
02:33:56.000 I didn't press record.
02:33:57.000 What do you think of...
02:33:58.000 What?
02:33:58.000 Let's record.
02:34:00.000 What are you doing over there?
02:34:01.000 In that purse I bought you.
02:34:03.000 Awful.
02:34:04.000 Yeah.
02:34:04.000 Could you imagine?
02:34:06.000 When you hear stories like that, aren't you just happy that...
02:34:10.000 It's not you?
02:34:10.000 Yeah.
02:34:11.000 That you just got married, have some kids, and you're just like...
02:34:14.000 There's a lot of things that aren't sexy about all of that stuff.
02:34:19.000 But being simple and just breaking it down to just, I go to my kid's school and I do my stuff.
02:34:24.000 Having a smaller world...
02:34:26.000 It is a relief.
02:34:28.000 It definitely is.
02:34:29.000 I mean, there's a certain level that you can get too big, and then things become like a giant, big, fat, crazy problem.
02:34:35.000 They're complex.
02:34:36.000 Yeah.
02:34:36.000 Well, if you're at that level, if you're at like a Richard Branson level...
02:34:40.000 Yeah.
02:34:40.000 Yeah, it's gotta be a...
02:34:42.000 Or a Johnny Depp level, even.
02:34:43.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:34:44.000 Yeah, it's gotta be a goddamn problem. 0.99
02:34:46.000 Heady. 1.00
02:34:47.000 Oh, yeah.
02:34:47.000 Heady.
02:34:48.000 Lots of heady.
02:34:49.000 Yeah.
02:34:49.000 Yeah.
02:34:50.000 You've got to be a real disciplined person and come up with a structure for yourself of working and taking care of your life without spinning out of control.
02:34:58.000 That's why a lot of people lose it.
02:34:59.000 Yeah.
02:34:59.000 I was talking to this dude in Seattle this past weekend who knew this guy who sued Paul Allen, the Microsoft guy, and won.
02:35:10.000 And now is scared to be in Seattle.
02:35:12.000 No, he never goes to Seattle anymore.
02:35:14.000 Oh, really?
02:35:15.000 Yeah.
02:35:15.000 Oh, my God.
02:35:15.000 He became super paranoid after he won.
02:35:19.000 So that's what I'm talking about.
02:35:22.000 Careful what you wish for.
02:35:23.000 You got to too high a level of the game, son.
02:35:25.000 How much did he win?
02:35:26.000 I don't know, man.
02:35:27.000 I don't even want to know.
02:35:28.000 I don't even want to look into it.
02:35:30.000 Yachts that are worth $100 million.
02:35:31.000 He owns islands. 1.00
02:35:34.000 Yeah, they have stupid money. 1.00
02:35:35.000 We were at the, there's an area called the locks, where the salmon swim through these ladders. 1.00
02:35:42.000 It's really dope, because you actually go underground, and there's a wall, a glass wall, and you can watch the fish swim.
02:35:49.000 Literally, the wild fish swim up these locks. 0.89
02:35:53.000 It's super fucking cool.
02:35:54.000 It makes you want to go fishing, too. 0.96
02:35:56.000 Is it right near Seattle?
02:35:57.000 Yeah, yeah, it's Ballard, the Ballard Locks.
02:35:59.000 Cool.
02:35:59.000 Ballard is like a small area of Seattle, which is a really, really fucking cool area with a lot of great little restaurants and bars and great community.
02:36:07.000 A friend of mine lives there.
02:36:08.000 Oh, nice.
02:36:09.000 And him and his family took us to this place.
02:36:10.000 And so we went to this Ballard Locks thing, and we were checking around, and we were looking at it, and one of the guys that was there, that's it right there.
02:36:17.000 So you get to look at it through this wall, and those salmon are all swimming up this little ladder.
02:36:23.000 Going home.
02:36:24.000 They're going to die. 0.99
02:36:26.000 Right.
02:36:26.000 But that's where they were born, right?
02:36:27.000 Yep.
02:36:28.000 The women salmon, the female salmon, they pump out the eggs and the dudes just stand over them and whack off. 1.00
02:36:34.000 They jizz on the eggs and then they die.
02:36:37.000 That's how they... 1.00
02:36:37.000 They don't even get to fuck. 1.00
02:36:38.000 Right. 0.89
02:36:39.000 Have you ever caught a fish that has come in it?
02:36:42.000 No.
02:36:43.000 When I was a kid, I used to trick question...
02:36:48.000 When I was a kid, I used to go fishing all the time.
02:36:51.000 I was big into fishing, and I would do a lot of rainbow trout fishing.
02:36:54.000 And when it was really great fun to catch them is when they were spawning.
02:36:57.000 And you would throw out your lure, and they would just attack anything.
02:37:01.000 They were super aggressive.
02:37:02.000 But then when you would pick them up, they would be jizzing.
02:37:05.000 Like you would pull them out of the water, and they'd be like, I took a chance!
02:37:08.000 Maybe there's eggs near me!
02:37:10.000 Because they know it's over.
02:37:11.000 Does fish jizz like our jizz?
02:37:12.000 I don't taste it.
02:37:14.000 And I've never tasted our jizz either, trick question. 0.99
02:37:16.000 Damn, you almost got me. 0.99
02:37:17.000 It's a minefield in here. 1.00
02:37:18.000 You almost got me, you motherfucker. 1.00
02:37:22.000 But you'd pick them up and they literally would be orgasming as you're pulling them out of the water. 1.00
02:37:28.000 They're jizzing all over the place.
02:37:29.000 That's crazy.
02:37:30.000 Yeah, apparently it's pretty common.
02:37:31.000 But I remember it a lot from when I was a kid.
02:37:33.000 I haven't had it happen to me since, but I do remember it a lot from when I was a kid.
02:37:38.000 But I don't do nearly as much fishing.
02:37:40.000 So wait, so Paul Allen, this guy sued Paul Allen.
02:37:42.000 So Paul Allen has this guy at the locks.
02:37:45.000 This is a circular sort of a thing.
02:37:47.000 Yeah.
02:37:47.000 The guy at the locks who I was talking to, I was asking him some questions about some of the fish.
02:37:52.000 He was pointing out the bays and how they changed this lake because there's a lake there and they didn't realize that when they cut this channel that it lowered the level of the lake and then that made it so the fish couldn't get back to the lake and it was a real issue.
02:38:06.000 They said they were stacks of dead salmon, like 20, 30 feet high.
02:38:10.000 Geez.
02:38:11.000 Yeah, crazy.
02:38:12.000 Wow.
02:38:12.000 They would just go to the area where they had always gone, but now the river didn't go all the way to the end where the lake was, and they would just wind up dying.
02:38:18.000 But he was saying that Paul Allen and Bill Gates both have these insane $150 million houses on this lake.
02:38:27.000 Wow.
02:38:28.000 Can you imagine what a $150 million house looks like, son?
02:38:32.000 I... no. 0.99
02:38:33.000 What the fuck are we even talking about, man? 0.99
02:38:35.000 I bet it's great Wi-Fi. 1.00
02:38:37.000 I bet the Wi-Fi's dog shit. 1.00
02:38:39.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:38:40.000 I bet he gets viruses every time he...
02:38:42.000 A lot of malware.
02:38:43.000 Every time he opens up a room, a new virus, because everything's on computers.
02:38:47.000 You wear a tie clip.
02:38:48.000 At least this is the way it used to work.
02:38:50.000 You would wear a pin, and you put that pin on.
02:38:53.000 And the pin, and this is like many, many years ago, so I'm sure the technology is far more advanced than that now.
02:38:57.000 But the way Bill Gates had it set up, every time you'd walk into a room, the pin would recognize the user, set the temperature to your preferences, and play the kind of music that you like, and put a certain type of lighting on.
02:39:08.000 Oh my god, it's gotta be amazing.
02:39:10.000 Yeah, but it's probably all outdated, which is kind of funny.
02:39:12.000 Unless he's updated it constantly.
02:39:14.000 I bet he updates it.
02:39:15.000 Gets a new operating system.
02:39:17.000 Yeah, it's Bill Gates.
02:39:19.000 Did they ever do a tour of Bill Gates' house?
02:39:21.000 Trying, huh?
02:39:22.000 I heard that it was mostly because of the technology, that it's not that massive.
02:39:26.000 Oh, really?
02:39:27.000 That's what I heard.
02:39:28.000 Well, that'd probably be a smart move to not stand out too much.
02:39:32.000 I heard that he has a submarine that he could escape in.
02:39:34.000 He could drop in a pod and drop below in the basement, because in case somebody breaks in the house, you could just shoot out of a tube in a submarine.
02:39:41.000 66,000 square feet.
02:39:43.000 Well, that's kind of big.
02:39:44.000 66?
02:39:45.000 That's not so big.
02:39:45.000 I mean, it's a little bigger than normal.
02:39:46.000 63 million to build.
02:39:48.000 Jesus Christ, it's worth at least $123 million, according to the King County Public Assessor's Office.
02:39:53.000 The property is worth $123.54 million as of this year.
02:39:58.000 Gates purchased the lot for $2 million in 1988, before Windows 95. It reportedly pays around $1 million in property taxes each year.
02:40:07.000 Wow.
02:40:07.000 Oh my God.
02:40:08.000 Half a million board feet of lumber was needed to complete the project.
02:40:14.000 Wow.
02:40:15.000 The house is built with...
02:40:16.000 Scroll down a little.
02:40:17.000 The house is built with 500-year-old Douglas fir trees.
02:40:20.000 300 construction workers labored on the home, 100 of whom were electricians.
02:40:25.000 50 died mysteriously.
02:40:27.000 I added that part.
02:40:29.000 I added that part.
02:40:29.000 What does it look like?
02:40:31.000 The house uses its natural surroundings to reduce heat loss.
02:40:35.000 It looks like it's covered in woods.
02:40:37.000 It's a little Asian. 0.98
02:40:38.000 It's like the side of the thing, and there's trees.
02:40:39.000 They add it all around it to What's above it?
02:40:41.000 What are those- that wall above it?
02:40:43.000 Is that his wall of China?
02:40:45.000 It looks like an apartment building.
02:40:46.000 There's probably other houses.
02:40:47.000 Oh, back there.
02:40:47.000 Come on!
02:40:48.000 The house can't be that close. 1.00
02:40:49.000 Bill Gates lives that close to his fucking neighbors? 1.00
02:40:51.000 On the lake, maybe. 1.00
02:40:53.000 Come on.
02:40:53.000 That's weird.
02:40:54.000 That's a house right above him.
02:40:55.000 He probably owns it, too, I would bet.
02:40:57.000 I would bet he would own everything anywhere near him.
02:40:59.000 And fill it up with mercenaries.
02:41:02.000 He's worth too much money.
02:41:03.000 Oh, yeah.
02:41:04.000 The pool also has its own underwater music system.
02:41:06.000 He did.
02:41:07.000 He did give a lot of money away.
02:41:08.000 There's a trampoline room with 20-foot ceilings.
02:41:11.000 Whee! 1.00
02:41:12.000 24 bathrooms.
02:41:14.000 He has a reception hall that can accommodate 200 guests.
02:41:18.000 Six kitchens.
02:41:19.000 Jesus Christ.
02:41:20.000 Enormous library.
02:41:21.000 Houses a manuscript Gates paid more than $30 million for.
02:41:26.000 What is the manuscript?
02:41:28.000 The Great Gatsby.
02:41:29.000 Wow.
02:41:32.000 Well, I don't know if that's it.
02:41:33.000 Oh no, you'll find a quote from him.
02:41:34.000 No, I'm sorry.
02:41:35.000 Yeah, what is the manuscript?
02:41:37.000 The Codex Leicester.
02:41:38.000 What is that?
02:41:39.000 Yeah, what is that?
02:41:41.000 The 16th century, it's Da Vinci.
02:41:44.000 Leonardo Da Vinci.
02:41:44.000 Oh man, he paid 30 million bucks for a Leonardo Da Vinci sketch.
02:41:49.000 Let's go get that.
02:41:50.000 Let's go to his house and find it.
02:41:53.000 Well, apparently that is...
02:41:54.000 I was talking to this real estate agent who told me that that is a big issue with houses that are listed, that are expensive houses, and they're framed, meaning inside you go in there, everything's already...
02:42:06.000 There's really nice sheets, and there's artwork on the walls, and staged is the right word.
02:42:11.000 And so they have this artwork.
02:42:13.000 A lot of these houses, like if it's an expensive house, they have expensive artwork.
02:42:17.000 And so people break into these houses while they know that they're selling the house and no one's living in it.
02:42:21.000 And take the stuff.
02:42:22.000 Take the artwork.
02:42:23.000 Let's do it, dude.
02:42:24.000 Dude, artwork is worth a lot of money.
02:42:26.000 Our official stream is stocked with fish. 0.88
02:42:29.000 I wonder if he gets in there and fucks those fish.
02:42:32.000 He has a favorite tree, and it's monitored electronically 24 hours a day. 0.86
02:42:35.000 He reportedly became fond of a 40-year-old maple tree that grew close to the home's driveway.
02:42:41.000 It's monitored by computer.
02:42:42.000 If at any point it becomes too dry, water is automatically pumped into it.
02:42:47.000 Whoa.
02:42:47.000 He's in love with a tree.
02:42:48.000 He loves trees.
02:42:49.000 Tesla was in love with a pigeon.
02:42:50.000 It's not that weird.
02:42:51.000 Yeah?
02:42:52.000 Yeah.
02:42:52.000 Nikola Tesla?
02:42:53.000 Yeah.
02:42:53.000 Fell in love with a pigeon.
02:42:55.000 Oh.
02:42:55.000 The sand on Gates' beach is imported from the Caribbean.
02:42:59.000 What a cunt. 1.00
02:43:00.000 Woo! 1.00
02:43:00.000 Woo! 1.00
02:43:01.000 35 grand to tour it.
02:43:03.000 Wow!
02:43:04.000 Microsoft holds an auction each year where employees donate products and services to bid on.
02:43:09.000 Proceeds go to the company's charitable fund.
02:43:10.000 Gates has donated private tours of Xanadu.
02:43:13.000 That's what he calls it.
02:43:14.000 Xanadu 2.0.
02:43:15.000 You have to wear leg warmers when you go in.
02:43:19.000 Yeah, and fuzzy slippers.
02:43:20.000 According to the Puget Sound Business Journal, a Microsoft employee once won a tour on a bid of $30,000.
02:43:26.000 He's an employee. 1.00
02:43:27.000 How about you give your fucking employee a break, you twat? 1.00
02:43:32.000 He wants to give. 1.00
02:43:33.000 Well, it actually goes to the chair a little far.
02:43:35.000 Yeah, that's nice.
02:43:35.000 He also has a 228-acre ranch, complete with a horse racing track.
02:43:40.000 He's got a lot of cash.
02:43:42.000 When you read stuff like that, you go, man, I've got to become more of a baller.
02:43:46.000 You're like, everything's free.
02:43:48.000 No, him and his wife say we're going to try and...
02:43:50.000 Size down?
02:43:51.000 We're going to try and solve the world hunger.
02:43:54.000 Yeah, it's not going to work, but...
02:43:56.000 I applaud their efforts.
02:43:57.000 Fix malaria.
02:43:59.000 Oh.
02:43:59.000 What, with the genetically modified mosquitoes?
02:44:02.000 Yes.
02:44:02.000 That might be possible.
02:44:03.000 Or, 28 days later, zombies.
02:44:07.000 Could be.
02:44:07.000 That might happen, too.
02:44:08.000 Could be.
02:44:09.000 Yeah, no, the mosquitoes become even fiercer and just come and kill us all.
02:44:13.000 Yeah, that's where Mercer came from.
02:44:15.000 Who?
02:44:16.000 MRSA. MRSA. What's that?
02:44:18.000 MRSA. Medication-resistant Staphylococcus.
02:44:24.000 Yeah.
02:44:25.000 It's essentially medication-resistant staph infections that are ruthless, that tear through people and kill a ton of people.
02:44:33.000 Did you ever hear about the Four Pests campaign?
02:44:35.000 I was going to bring this up when you were talking about those mosquitoes earlier.
02:44:38.000 Right.
02:44:39.000 This was in China in like the 1950s.
02:44:40.000 They were having problems with a couple different pests, mostly sparrows.
02:44:44.000 It's said in this case there were hundreds of millions of sparrows.
02:44:46.000 So there's a government mandate to try to get rid of them.
02:44:49.000 So people were literally going outside and banging on pans for hours at a time so that they couldn't land and they would die from exhaustion.
02:44:57.000 Ten years later or so, there was a giant famine because all the pests were stopping eating all the bugs.
02:45:05.000 The bugs started eating all the bamboo and rice.
02:45:07.000 And 30 million people died.
02:45:11.000 The wind of a butterfly can become the beginning of a hurricane.
02:45:19.000 It's really what it is.
02:45:20.000 Yeah, you can't mess with nature.
02:45:22.000 But on this mosquito thing, this emergency they're doing in Florida, the officials are asking to skip a field trial, and they want to just go right into it and not test these mosquitoes whatsoever.
02:45:33.000 It sounds like that could be a bigger problem later.
02:45:36.000 Where if Congress had funded this a year ago, they would have done all those tests. 0.99
02:45:41.000 Well, there's a lot of fucking people getting the Zika virus. 0.99
02:45:44.000 And on top of that, the latest thing is that now they find out that men who don't show any symptoms can transmit the Zika virus sexually. 0.99
02:45:53.000 Right.
02:45:54.000 So you could have no symptoms and you just drop a load on someone else.
02:45:59.000 Some poor trout gets Zika.
02:46:01.000 A trout. 1.00
02:46:02.000 Oh, who are we fucking? 0.99
02:46:03.000 No, people. 0.99
02:46:04.000 Oh, people.
02:46:04.000 The only people.
02:46:05.000 Oh, and with a girl?
02:46:05.000 Not a fish.
02:46:06.000 Yeah, girls. 1.00
02:46:06.000 Okay. 1.00
02:46:07.000 And Florida.
02:46:08.000 And apparently, there was another thing that an unlikely ally, I was reading this, an unlikely ally of the Zika virus is high-rise luxury condominiums.
02:46:16.000 For some reason, high-rise luxury condominiums make excellent grounds for Zika viruses to start breeding.
02:46:23.000 They live in the vents.
02:46:24.000 I don't know.
02:46:25.000 I don't understand why. 0.99
02:46:27.000 But there's areas where the CDC is thinking about roping them off and going, okay, we got a fucking problem here. 0.99
02:46:32.000 Really? 0.99
02:46:32.000 Yeah! 0.99
02:46:33.000 Well, dude, the repercussions are dangerous.
02:46:34.000 Yeah, what are the repercussions?
02:46:36.000 What's going to happen if Zika spreads?
02:46:37.000 The big ones are reproductive.
02:46:38.000 For women, when they have kids, the kids develop this horrible disorder where their heads are too small. 1.00
02:46:43.000 With the little heads?
02:46:43.000 Yeah.
02:46:44.000 But, uh... 0.94
02:46:46.000 I wonder if you could just, like, get a balloon in their head and blow it up. 0.99
02:46:50.000 Flate their balloon. 0.69
02:46:52.000 Zika's accidental ally, Miami's luxury high-rises, low-flying planes, urban wind tunnels, and imprecise applications raise the risk of mosquitoes developing resistance to insecticides. 0.93
02:47:05.000 Whoa.
02:47:07.000 Oh, interesting.
02:47:09.000 So it doesn't kill you, it just gives your babies little heads. 0.97
02:47:11.000 Hmm.
02:47:12.000 Low-flying planes.
02:47:14.000 So it's like, that's a wind issue.
02:47:17.000 Aerial spraying with ultra-low volume can only be done when there's not much wind.
02:47:24.000 Oh, the spray.
02:47:26.000 Oh, so the wind and then probably the high-rises are in the way.
02:47:31.000 And so around the high-rises they can't spray.
02:47:34.000 And they can't get low enough.
02:47:37.000 You gotta get in there with like a bubbles wand.
02:47:42.000 Wow. 0.99
02:47:42.000 This is scary shit though. 0.99
02:47:44.000 Because this is just one. 0.99
02:47:45.000 That's the thing.
02:47:48.000 We went to the CDC, Duncan and I did, for this episode of my sci-fi show.
02:47:52.000 We talked about weaponized diseases.
02:47:55.000 And they were pretty frank about it.
02:47:57.000 They said, we are not worried about someone coming up with a disease.
02:48:00.000 We're worried about nature.
02:48:02.000 Right.
02:48:02.000 We're like, no one has ever been able to successfully come up with a disease.
02:48:04.000 And there's all these fears and all these conspiracy theories.
02:48:08.000 What you should really be terrified of is just regular old nature taking a terrible disease and it becomes airborne.
02:48:15.000 It mutates, it changes, and they do it all the time.
02:48:18.000 And they had Ebola.
02:48:20.000 They had all these crazy diseases locked up in this lab where they had like these four-foot-thick walls and giant glass windows you look through and everyone in these spacesuits on.
02:48:29.000 They were attached to these exhaust vents.
02:48:32.000 Right.
02:48:32.000 They were walking around with vacuum tubes hanging off of them.
02:48:34.000 It was really creepy.
02:48:36.000 Oh, my God.
02:48:36.000 And inside those walls...
02:48:37.000 Yeah, just one little sample of anything.
02:48:39.000 Mm-hmm.
02:48:40.000 And these are hurricane-proof buildings, so the building's designed...
02:48:42.000 Because it's right in Galveston.
02:48:44.000 It's near the coast.
02:48:44.000 Oh, my God.
02:48:45.000 So these... 0.99
02:48:46.000 Buildings are designed to get impacted by gigantic hundred-foot waves and shit and survive and keep all the bacteria intact. 0.98
02:48:54.000 Why are they saving this stuff? 0.98
02:48:55.000 Well, they want to study it.
02:48:56.000 They want to figure out how to solve it.
02:48:59.000 They figure if they keep studying it, they might be able to find different ways to keep it from killing all of us.
02:49:04.000 Oh, my God.
02:49:05.000 Jesus Christ, Tom Papa.
02:49:06.000 Just take some malaria medications.
02:49:08.000 The dreams are awesome.
02:49:10.000 No, no, no.
02:49:11.000 It's so clear.
02:49:12.000 But it's not just that.
02:49:13.000 Malaria medication doesn't work against the Zika. 1.00
02:49:14.000 They don't have Zika medication, you fuck. 1.00
02:49:16.000 Giving people bad advice. 1.00
02:49:18.000 What about Ebola?
02:49:19.000 Huh?
02:49:20.000 Again, malaria medication.
02:49:22.000 You can dream that you don't have it.
02:49:24.000 Right.
02:49:24.000 If you take it, the dreams are so vivid, you believe you actually don't have it, and then the placebo effect kicks in.
02:49:30.000 When I was in the Africa with my...
02:49:34.000 You can't say it like that.
02:49:36.000 I'm sorry.
02:49:37.000 When I was in...
02:49:38.000 White privilege.
02:49:38.000 The Africa.
02:49:40.000 Africa.
02:49:41.000 In Africa. 0.56
02:49:43.000 Like I said, the malaria medication gives you a little upset belly sometimes. 1.00
02:49:47.000 Are you shit yourself? 0.99
02:49:48.000 So when we were stopping through one of those little towns where I said I was all paranoid. 1.00
02:49:51.000 Right.
02:49:52.000 And I went to go use a restroom.
02:49:54.000 Was it a hole in the ground?
02:49:55.000 No, almost.
02:49:58.000 Pretty much.
02:49:59.000 Kind of like a port-a-potty kind of thing.
02:50:01.000 But as you go running in, this little boy, probably around eight, went, Hey, look!
02:50:09.000 Whitey man! 0.99
02:50:13.000 That didn't help with my paranoia at all.
02:50:16.000 I like that.
02:50:16.000 Hey, Whitey Man!
02:50:18.000 That should be the cover, the title of your new special.
02:50:21.000 Yeah.
02:50:21.000 Hey, look, Whitey Man.
02:50:23.000 Hey, look, Whitey Man. 1.00
02:50:24.000 I like that.
02:50:25.000 It is pretty good.
02:50:26.000 I like that.
02:50:26.000 That's catchy.
02:50:27.000 Me in a suit.
02:50:28.000 Yeah.
02:50:29.000 Yeah, you with like Colonel Sanders type suit on?
02:50:33.000 Whitey Man. 0.98
02:50:34.000 Whitey Man. 0.98
02:50:36.000 See, you can't really offend people by calling them whitey, though.
02:50:39.000 No!
02:50:39.000 Whitey doesn't bother me at Cracker.
02:50:41.000 None of that bothers me.
02:50:43.000 Not at all.
02:50:44.000 Anything that calls out my whiteness is like...
02:50:46.000 Yeah, sorry, I'm awesome.
02:50:51.000 Why are you pointing out my advantages?
02:50:54.000 White privilege! 1.00
02:50:56.000 Then one older kid said, look at these motherfuckers! 1.00
02:50:59.000 Whoa. 1.00
02:50:59.000 Yeah, he yelled that on our way into town when we were in our little open safari vehicle. 1.00
02:51:03.000 Really?
02:51:03.000 Yeah.
02:51:03.000 Was he saying it like in a mad way or laughing?
02:51:06.000 Like a mad way.
02:51:08.000 Like, what are you driving?
02:51:09.000 What are you looking at?
02:51:10.000 Oh.
02:51:11.000 What are you looking at?
02:51:11.000 That didn't feel comfortable, huh?
02:51:13.000 No.
02:51:14.000 Just keep driving.
02:51:15.000 Keep driving. 1.00
02:51:15.000 White people just keep driving through this area where people go, look at this motherfucker. 1.00
02:51:18.000 Yeah, with the name of the resort, of the place you're staying on the side, they know that, you know. 1.00
02:51:23.000 Oh, you got some money there, fancy man?
02:51:24.000 Yeah, some money.
02:51:25.000 People coming from another country. 1.00
02:51:27.000 Yeah, fancy man. 1.00
02:51:29.000 Motherfucker. 1.00
02:51:29.000 Ooh, very upset, huh? 1.00
02:51:31.000 Yeah.
02:51:32.000 Did you close your kids' ears?
02:51:33.000 Cover their ears?
02:51:34.000 I just went, oh, that was nice.
02:51:37.000 Yeah.
02:51:37.000 How about that guy?
02:51:38.000 Yeah, like, if I went to Tanzania, and I would like to go, I would want to think about how much time to spend there.
02:51:46.000 How much time did you spend there?
02:51:48.000 Ten days.
02:51:49.000 That seems like a right number.
02:51:50.000 It was perfect.
02:51:52.000 Because you're...
02:51:53.000 It's a big...
02:51:55.000 It's far.
02:51:56.000 24 hours of travel.
02:51:58.000 And what do you fly into?
02:51:59.000 Do you fly in Holland or did you go to...
02:52:01.000 Amsterdam, yep.
02:52:02.000 Dubai is another one.
02:52:03.000 Went to Amsterdam.
02:52:04.000 And I left from New York.
02:52:06.000 From here it's like an 11 hour flight.
02:52:08.000 And then you switch and then it's another 8 to 9 hours to Kilimanjaro.
02:52:14.000 Then you've got to...
02:52:15.000 Get a puddle jumper and get into the Serengeti, get into the Grimetti.
02:52:19.000 So did you stay in Holland?
02:52:23.000 No, I just went.
02:52:25.000 Wow.
02:52:25.000 I've done trips where you stop and we'll adjust for a day.
02:52:29.000 Just get it over with.
02:52:30.000 Just go.
02:52:31.000 Just push it and get there.
02:52:32.000 I did Rome this weekend, this summer rather.
02:52:35.000 Oh, that's the best.
02:52:36.000 We did Rome first and then we went to the Amalfi Coast.
02:52:39.000 Nice.
02:52:39.000 We did both of those.
02:52:40.000 I've never been there.
02:52:41.000 I've been to Rome. 0.97
02:52:42.000 We were thinking about just staying in one place, but we said, let's fucking mix it up. 0.94
02:52:45.000 It was the right move. 0.87
02:52:46.000 Was it great?
02:52:46.000 Oh, yeah.
02:52:47.000 Great.
02:52:48.000 Both of them were awesome in different ways.
02:52:50.000 Yeah.
02:52:50.000 Amalfi Coast is awesome because you can't even believe it's real.
02:52:52.000 It's so pretty and so nice.
02:52:54.000 It doesn't even seem real.
02:52:55.000 Gorgeous.
02:52:56.000 And then Rome is just, the artwork in the Vatican alone is worth a trip.
02:53:00.000 It's amazing.
02:53:02.000 What I love about Rome, too, is that it's still a vibrant city.
02:53:05.000 It's so old and so much ancient history, but it's a young, hip city.
02:53:11.000 People are working hard and doing stuff.
02:53:13.000 You go to Florence and places like that, it's beautiful, but it's kind of like a museum.
02:53:17.000 Young people aren't going to make it. 1.00
02:53:19.000 There.
02:53:20.000 They are in Rome.
02:53:22.000 Another thing that I felt was crazy was that the Vatican is its own country with its own rules.
02:53:28.000 That's why the popes all stay there after they leave because otherwise they can't...
02:53:32.000 Pope Benedict, they wanted to try him for crimes against humanity and he's being shielded by the Vatican.
02:53:38.000 There's countries that are actively trying to extract him.
02:53:43.000 They're trying with legal action to get him out of the Vatican so they can try him.
02:53:48.000 Because the last pope was a really bad guy.
02:53:52.000 I know. 0.99
02:53:52.000 You know the whole shielding child molesters that went on to rape deaf kids? 0.99
02:53:57.000 He was a big part of all that. 0.66
02:53:58.000 He was one of the key...
02:54:00.000 Not just allegedly.
02:54:01.000 One of the key guys when it came to relocating child molesters where they would molest new kids.
02:54:07.000 Yeah, he was the architect of moving a lot of the people around, right?
02:54:09.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:54:10.000 Has there ever been an organization that's fucked as many kids as the Catholic Church? 0.99
02:54:15.000 Wasn't there a party that kind of felt at the Vatican like this is obscene? 0.99
02:54:19.000 Yes.
02:54:20.000 Yes.
02:54:20.000 Yeah.
02:54:21.000 Well, it's human creativity and human ambition and this overwhelming desire to create something magnificent. 0.99
02:54:33.000 These massive fucking temples. 0.99
02:54:36.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:54:36.000 These enormous cathedrals. 1.00
02:54:37.000 Right.
02:54:38.000 You know, like St. Peter's Basilica.
02:54:40.000 Yeah.
02:54:40.000 You wander around and you're like, this took how long?
02:54:43.000 Hundreds of years to make.
02:54:44.000 Hundreds.
02:54:45.000 It's amazing.
02:54:46.000 Amazing.
02:54:47.000 But it's also that same psychotic behavior that, like, makes someone create something like that.
02:54:52.000 It's also responsible for all these bizarre cathedrals.
02:54:57.000 behavior traits that suppressive people that are in those sort of situations suppress people.
02:55:02.000 And there's a difference between the people that are creating it and the people that are paying for it to be created.
02:55:07.000 Those people that just went in and took countries over and slaughtered people. 0.97
02:55:11.000 It's very similar to what we were talking about with the Native Americans. 0.99
02:55:14.000 It's also weird that none of that shit's even in the Bible. 0.99
02:55:17.000 That you have to have a pope. 0.99
02:55:18.000 Right.
02:55:19.000 They all make that up.
02:55:20.000 That's a completely made up thing by human beings.
02:55:23.000 That's the hardest part when you go to Rome and you start – there was a place, it was great, I forget the name of it, but it has a church, an active church, and then you can sightsee, you can go below that, is a really old church that, you know, just things, you know, in Rome,
02:55:38.000 things just settle and they just build on top.
02:55:40.000 So it's this active church, then underneath, a really old church, and below that, way underground, is this pagan temple.
02:55:51.000 And they weren't worshipping Jesus.
02:55:53.000 They were worshipping these strange pagan gods.
02:55:56.000 And you just see, this was just man interpreting this feeling and using it for their advantage or whatever, at a pagan level to this level to today.
02:56:05.000 It's the same.
02:56:06.000 And the thing about Rome is like, if you go in there wanting to hold on to Your Christian beliefs or any of that stuff and you look at the history, like literally right there in the landscape, that this has just come from us trying to figure stuff out as there's no one truth.
02:56:21.000 It breaks all that down.
02:56:23.000 I don't know how you can withstand it without just pure faith.
02:56:26.000 They just put blinders on.
02:56:42.000 I am on the team.
02:56:43.000 It's the same thing. 0.98
02:56:44.000 Being a loyal Democrat, being a loyal Republican, being a fucking loyal Mac user, being a religious nut, a lot of it is the same thing. 0.98
02:56:52.000 It's like this human desire to just... 0.99
02:56:55.000 I'm settled.
02:56:57.000 I'm this.
02:56:57.000 I identify with this.
02:56:58.000 I'm locked in.
02:56:59.000 It's comforting.
02:57:00.000 You feel like you belong.
02:57:01.000 This is the right way.
02:57:03.000 I don't have to think about this stuff.
02:57:04.000 They're going to do that part of the thinking for me. 0.99
02:57:06.000 That's why that pussy football player should have just stood up! 1.00
02:57:11.000 Put your hand over your heart, pussy! 1.00
02:57:14.000 I don't want to hear all this Black Lives Matter bullshit about equality. 1.00
02:57:19.000 Put your hand over your heart! 0.99
02:57:20.000 Your heart, whatever it is.
02:57:22.000 Your heart!
02:57:23.000 If you're going to be a quarterback, you act like a quarterback.
02:57:26.000 Listen, as an American, you want to play soccer?
02:57:29.000 What do you want to do?
02:57:30.000 You want to play cricket?
02:57:31.000 You don't like America?
02:57:33.000 How about you go play cricket? 1.00
02:57:34.000 You get yourself some freedom fries and shut the hell up. 0.99
02:57:37.000 That's right, bro. 1.00
02:57:38.000 I gotta get in this fucking thing. 1.00
02:57:39.000 I gotta get out of here. 0.99
02:57:40.000 Tom Papa, I always enjoy talking with you, my friend.
02:57:43.000 I love coming by. 0.99
02:57:44.000 You're a fucking beautiful man. 0.99
02:57:44.000 I have to say, when I was out there on safari, you know, cruising around for all this time, I thought about you often. 0.99
02:57:51.000 I was like, he would love...
02:57:53.000 To see, I mean, just animals, eating animals.
02:57:56.000 Anytime something extreme, it was like...
02:57:58.000 And it's controlled and your family would be safe.
02:58:00.000 I can't recommend it enough.
02:58:01.000 They're too young right now to take the medication.
02:58:04.000 But I think when I get older, I think I'm going to definitely do it.
02:58:06.000 It seems like something that should be done.
02:58:09.000 Like I said, the Vatican was something that after I did it, it took a long time to get there and all that jazz, but I was like, I'm so glad I did it.
02:58:15.000 I needed to see that.
02:58:16.000 When you get home, did you bring your family?
02:58:18.000 Yeah.
02:58:18.000 When you get home, don't you feel like...
02:58:20.000 Yeah, I did that.
02:58:22.000 I got those kids there.
02:58:23.000 That was the same thing with Africa. 0.79
02:58:24.000 It was one of those.
02:58:25.000 I felt like for them, they had a lot of questions, too.
02:58:28.000 So it was really cool, like, looking at all this art.
02:58:30.000 I mean, you're going one insane room filled with sculptures to another insane room filled with other things.
02:58:35.000 It's nuts.
02:58:36.000 The hallway is filled with incredible ancient maps.
02:58:39.000 There's so much going on, you know?
02:58:40.000 Amazing.
02:58:41.000 It really is amazing.
02:58:42.000 Then you get home, you light a big, fat cigar, and you're like, that's right, I did that.
02:58:45.000 I pretend I'm on Scaravisionado magazine.
02:58:48.000 I pose.
02:58:49.000 So that when I am, one day, I'll get it right.
02:58:50.000 I'll be like...
02:58:52.000 Good night, everybody.
02:58:53.000 See you tomorrow.
02:58:53.000 Donald Cowboy Cerrone will be here tomorrow.
02:58:55.000 Tom Papa on Twitter.
02:58:57.000 Go watch him. 0.99
02:58:58.000 He's fucking hilarious. 0.96
02:58:59.000 See you soon. 0.96
02:58:59.000 Bye-bye! 0.96