The Matt Walsh Show - July 29, 2022


Matt Walsh Tries To Laugh At Feminist Comedienne Samantha Bee | THROWBACK EDITION

Topics
Hosted by
Mentioned
Ep. 995 - The Eco Friendly City Of The Future Is A Dystopian Hellscape Ep. 996 - White Slaves, And Other Inconvenient Historical Facts

Episode Stats


Length

15 minutes

Words per minute

177.99

Word count

2,686

Sentence count

270

Harmful content

Misogyny

22

sentences flagged

Toxicity

13

sentences flagged

Hate speech

6

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Samantha Bee is a stand-up comedian and host of the hit show Full Frontal with Samantha Bee. She's also the host of a new show on TBS called about women in comedy. And she's a feminist.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 You know, recently I shared the devastating news that Full Frontal with Samantha Bee has
00:00:03.960 been canceled by TBS.
00:00:05.760 Now, you might be asking questions like, why are you reading news from five years ago?
00:00:10.160 Or who the hell is Samantha Bee? 0.78
00:00:11.720 But if you're a fan of this show, you might not realize Samantha and I have a little bit
00:00:15.460 of a history together because my producers obviously hate me, as you know.
00:00:19.620 They periodically make me watch feminist comedians do their best imitation of a suffering cat, 1.00
00:00:25.120 which of course, I mean, you know, their stand-up comedy routines is what they call
00:00:27.920 them.
00:00:28.040 The very first video in this Try to Laugh series featured Samantha Bee.
00:00:31.240 You know, we were ahead of the curve.
00:00:32.260 We shot this back in 2020.
00:00:34.220 Let's just say that her jokes have aged as well as a fine glass of milk.
00:00:38.580 Watch.
00:00:39.660 So my producer suggested that I watch and review some feminist comedy bits. 1.00
00:00:46.080 And he suggested this because evidently he hates my guts, which is understandable.
00:00:51.620 I would hate me too if I wasn't me.
00:00:53.540 I am me and I hate me.
00:00:54.560 So, you know, but the thing is, I did actually watch some feminist comedy in anticipation 1.00
00:00:59.740 of doing this little YouTube video.
00:01:01.880 And, uh, but, but much of it was so bad.
00:01:04.760 I'm a feminist. 1.00
00:01:05.640 And usually like, I'm, um, I'm like not an advocate of like street harassment and stuff
00:01:11.120 like that.
00:01:11.700 Um, except from men that wear gray track suits.
00:01:16.500 Just so, so, so bad.
00:01:20.140 I remember when Kate Middleton announced her pregnancy, I was like, ah, I wonder if she'll
00:01:25.820 keep it.
00:01:26.480 Who knows?
00:01:28.260 That I thought maybe the fruit was hanging a little too low, a little too, a little, it's
00:01:32.200 a little too easy.
00:01:33.060 And there's all kinds of euphemism packed into that last sentence that you can get into
00:01:37.200 later.
00:01:37.660 But then I thought if I'm going to review feminist comedy, I shouldn't go for the obscure
00:01:41.520 ones.
00:01:41.900 I should focus on a feminist comedian who is successful, well-known, allegedly talented. 1.00
00:01:48.340 And that's why I am going to focus on Samantha Bee.
00:01:51.180 You know, Samantha Bee has her own comedy show on Lifetime or whatever it's on. 1.00
00:01:55.120 And she's hailed by the media as brilliant and hilarious and genius and so on.
00:02:00.780 That's what the media says about her. 1.00
00:02:02.160 I figure she's the best of the best when it comes to woke female comedians. 1.00
00:02:06.100 So let me give her a shot. 0.99
00:02:08.040 We're going to watch some Samantha Bee together.
00:02:10.700 And more than reviewing it, I think I want to see if I can find a reason to laugh.
00:02:18.380 I want to laugh at a Samantha Bee joke.
00:02:21.720 I want to see if I can do that today.
00:02:23.480 I'll try my hardest.
00:02:25.600 So let's watch this together.
00:02:27.380 Let's start with this.
00:02:28.320 We'll take a look.
00:02:29.080 Okay.
00:02:33.460 Meat packing workers often contend with cramped conditions, grueling labor, and long hours.
00:02:38.840 So it's unsurprising that plants have become hotspots for COVID-19.
00:02:43.120 If we want to keep our food supply safe, we should first keep our workers safe.
00:02:47.500 So naturally, the president isn't.
00:02:50.320 Following aggressive lobbying from the meat industry, Trump issued an executive order aimed
00:02:54.680 at reopening meat processing plants.
00:02:56.960 Look, it's not shocking.
00:02:58.300 The president leapt into action to save meat because burgers?
00:03:03.300 You in danger, girl. 1.00
00:03:05.460 Okay.
00:03:08.760 So I think there were some jokes in there.
00:03:10.520 I can't be sure.
00:03:11.660 And this might be part of Samantha Bee's genius, that she tells jokes and nobody knows that they're
00:03:17.240 jokes.
00:03:18.060 So she's deconstructing comedy. 0.98
00:03:20.160 That's what I'm told.
00:03:21.240 That's the thing about female comedians. 1.00
00:03:23.760 Samantha Bee, Hannah Gadsby, they're always deconstructing comedy rather than just telling
00:03:30.880 funny jokes.
00:03:32.080 And I don't mean to imply that women aren't funny.
00:03:35.100 I would never imply that.
00:03:36.300 I, in fact, am stating it explicitly.
00:03:39.380 Just kidding.
00:03:40.160 Not really, but sort of.
00:03:42.040 Okay.
00:03:42.340 Let's keep going.
00:03:42.900 From Ohio to New York, Michigan to California, this morning, the beef shortage at Wendy's
00:03:48.800 is spreading.
00:03:49.520 The company with that unforgettable catchphrase decades ago is now having trouble finding
00:03:54.580 the beef.
00:03:55.200 You're out of beef then?
00:03:56.940 Out of patties?
00:03:57.860 It's embarrassing that the Where's the Beef place is out of beef.
00:04:01.980 It'd be like if someone at Taco Bell was caught thinking inside the bun.
00:04:08.620 Okay.
00:04:09.820 Let's stop right there.
00:04:12.100 This is a professional comedian, folks.
00:04:14.380 She makes millions of dollars telling jokes. 1.00
00:04:17.740 And yet she's never actually told one, so far as I can tell.
00:04:22.760 And so I'm starting to figure out that when people say Samantha Bee is funny, which I've
00:04:27.420 never actually heard anyone say that, but theoretically, if they do say that, they don't mean it on the
00:04:32.860 scale of comedians, right?
00:04:34.580 They're using a different scale.
00:04:36.560 What they mean is that she's funny for a feminist, which is like saying a corn dog is healthy for 1.00
00:04:44.240 carnival food.
00:04:45.460 So maybe if we understand it on that scale, we get into the mind of a feminist, maybe it 1.00
00:04:50.800 becomes funny.
00:04:51.480 So let's keep going.
00:04:53.400 With some food shortages and increased prices, the federal Supplemental Nutrition Assistance
00:04:58.440 Program is more necessary than ever.
00:05:01.220 About 38 million people rely on SNAP benefits to feed their families.
00:05:05.820 And last month, the USDA announced it would increase overall benefits 40 percent to give
00:05:10.840 families more money to buy food.
00:05:12.760 Unfortunately, many food stamp households were left out of the benefit expansion because they
00:05:17.500 were already receiving the maximum amount.
00:05:19.780 Now, while Democrats are trying to raise benefits by 15 percent, Republicans are attempting to
00:05:25.740 block that change.
00:05:27.320 Just for context, the maximum benefit for a family of four is only $646 per month.
00:05:34.060 For Republicans, giving hungry families an extra hundred bucks during a worldwide pandemic is 0.99
00:05:39.660 too big of an ask, both because they deeply, passionately don't give a shit about poor people 0.99
00:05:45.260 and because Steve Mnuchin needs it to fashion sheets for his bed. 0.98
00:05:49.780 My God, my God in heaven, deliver me, Lord.
00:05:58.000 Let's try a different video.
00:05:59.280 Maybe this was, this could have been a bad outing.
00:06:01.100 You know, it's, it's, that's fair.
00:06:02.560 Like not, not, not, it's not going to be great every single time for a comedian.
00:06:07.180 I understand that, you know, it's a tough job, I have to imagine.
00:06:10.240 So let's be fair.
00:06:11.420 We'll go to a different video.
00:06:14.960 We'll try this.
00:06:15.780 Um, okay.
00:06:17.900 Let's give this a shot, this a shot here.
00:06:19.660 Still reporting from the woods.
00:06:21.480 I had hoped that as we moved into spring, the forest would start to look green and full
00:06:25.420 of life.
00:06:26.320 Instead, it's totally infested by gnats.
00:06:29.260 Oh, yeah, they're landing on my face now.
00:06:33.420 Stop there. 1.00
00:06:34.160 Kill me. 1.00
00:06:42.360 Okay. 0.98
00:06:43.320 Given recent SCOTUS wins, it feels like the pendulum may be swinging back to a time when
00:06:47.460 the nuclear family was situated at the center of American life, where real conversation,
00:06:51.640 learning, and growth began at home with your family gathered around the table.
00:06:55.880 And President Ronald Reagan's farewell address, he said, all great changes in America begin
00:06:59.640 around the dinner table, where you can bring your family to the dinner table with Good
00:07:02.780 Ranchers.
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00:07:11.300 ones easy, accessible, and delicious.
00:07:13.360 Good Ranchers ships 100% American meat born, raised, and harvested in the U.S. right to your
00:07:17.120 door.
00:07:17.360 Plus, when you subscribe, your price is locked in for the life of your subscription.
00:07:21.320 Good Ranchers not only supports American agriculture, they also are big fans of Daily Wire.
00:07:25.140 They support all of our shows, which is another reason to go check them out.
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00:07:32.240 Take advantage of this offer today.
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00:07:41.300 Go to GoodRanchers.com slash MATT to start bringing people back to the table and eating
00:07:46.220 seriously delicious food.
00:07:48.300 And given how afraid I am of the grocery store, that's how I'm getting half my protein.
00:07:52.040 As the great American lockdown continues, we have reason to be grateful. 0.79
00:07:56.320 Social distancing is working.
00:07:58.280 So naturally, the question on everyone's minds is, when can the country reopen?
00:08:02.380 Unfortunately, not yet.
00:08:03.840 Look, I know it's hard.
00:08:05.160 I've been home so long I got horny just thinking about dining in at a pizza hut.
00:08:08.580 Okay, this is worse.
00:08:12.940 This is honestly worse than I thought.
00:08:14.120 I'm actually, I'm plunging into despair right now.
00:08:16.280 I am losing my will to live every second that I watch this.
00:08:18.900 I want to cry.
00:08:20.260 I do.
00:08:20.920 I don't even know why.
00:08:21.820 I'm just, I'm overcome by this wave of just total emotional desolation.
00:08:27.860 That's how bad this is.
00:08:29.360 It is making me long for the sweet embrace of death. 0.97
00:08:32.240 I wish I was dead right now.
00:08:33.600 I just had this image while I was watching this.
00:08:35.060 I had this image in my head of a guy burning to death in a house fire, and I was jealous
00:08:40.200 of that guy because at least he's not watching Samantha Bee.
00:08:46.500 Let's try, okay, we're going to abandon this.
00:08:49.360 Let's go, here's another video.
00:08:51.840 Let's give this one a shot.
00:08:53.040 Third time's a charm, right?
00:08:54.000 That's the same goes.
00:08:54.840 Here we go.
00:08:55.500 I don't know about you, but for me, it's crucial to stay productive during quarantine.
00:09:00.080 For example, at the start of the year, I bought a journal to keep tabs on every book I've
00:09:04.620 read and every film I've seen, but now I'm just keeping a list of every porn I've watched 0.66
00:09:09.340 that's troubled me, starting with hardcore kissing.
00:09:12.620 It's not what you think.
00:09:13.880 You know what?
00:09:14.480 Maybe, okay, maybe she's having a hard time with coronavirus material because it's, let's
00:09:19.340 be fair, it can be hard to come up with funny jokes around the coronavirus.
00:09:22.520 So let's, we'll go back.
00:09:23.960 We'll go back a few months, just to be fair.
00:09:25.680 Here, let's find a video of her from before all this.
00:09:30.180 So this is from last July and we'll give this one a shot.
00:09:33.620 Let's take a look.
00:09:34.320 In the past week, our beloved president of the United States of Rhodesia has done so many
00:09:39.960 racisms, we don't have time to cover them all.
00:09:42.780 So if you want to hear about Trump's social media summit, his threatened ice raids and
00:09:46.820 his failed effort to weaponize the census, turn to TBS2 for Full Frontal After Dark, where 0.98
00:09:52.360 I rant in my sleep about what a prick our president is. 0.92
00:09:56.040 Then stay tuned for Old Sheldon. 0.96
00:09:58.840 But for now, let's focus on the three.
00:10:01.620 Did you get, it's because there's a, there's a show called Young Sheldon.
00:10:08.020 And so she's saying, there's a show called Old, what if there's a show called Old, it's
00:10:12.340 not Young Sheldon, it's Old Sheldon.
00:10:16.060 That's the joke.
00:10:17.080 Let's focus on the three racistest things Trump's been up to lately, starting with this.
00:10:22.240 President Trump unapologetic, defending his racist Twitter tirade aimed at four Democratic
00:10:28.160 Congresswomen of color, after telling them Sunday to go back to help fix the totally broken 0.90
00:10:33.560 and crime infested places from which they came.
00:10:36.680 Sadly, the only thing that should surprise anyone is that he wrote from which they came
00:10:41.240 to avoid ending a sentence with a preposition.
00:10:43.520 Way to go, Shakespeare!
00:10:45.120 Shakespeare, now return your head to the orifice from which it came.
00:10:49.640 Of course, it wasn't long before.
00:10:51.700 I'm trying.
00:10:53.420 This is, this is not a bit at this point.
00:10:56.020 I want to laugh at a Samantha Bee joke.
00:10:58.400 I do.
00:10:59.100 That is on my bucket list.
00:11:01.380 Some people want to climb Mount Everest.
00:11:04.780 I want to find, I want to find a funny Samantha Bee joke.
00:11:08.280 That's all I want to do with my life now.
00:11:10.020 I want to be able to say out loud, this is what I want to be able to say this.
00:11:14.580 Have you heard that hilarious Samantha Bee joke?
00:11:17.800 And then I want the person I'm talking to to say, did you say hilarious Samantha Bee joke? 0.88
00:11:22.820 And then I go, yes, you sexist.
00:11:26.720 What, you don't think women are funny? 1.00
00:11:28.420 Well, listen to this and then I'll repeat the joke and we'll all have a good laugh.
00:11:32.280 That's what I want.
00:11:33.240 And it will end sexism once and for all.
00:11:35.820 That is my goal.
00:11:36.680 It's the only thing I want to do with my life now is my life's work.
00:11:40.120 I will find the joke.
00:11:42.500 Let's keep looking.
00:11:43.540 We'll go to a new video.
00:11:47.140 Here we go.
00:11:47.800 I'm feeling good about this.
00:11:49.140 Okay.
00:11:49.400 This is a, this is a Greta Thunberg related thing.
00:11:52.280 So there could be some good comedy here.
00:11:54.140 Let's take a look.
00:11:54.900 To most of America.
00:11:55.800 I'm Samantha Bee, the comedian.
00:11:57.540 Samantha Bee, the style icon.
00:11:59.600 Samantha Bee, the author of the 12th most popular line of self-published dinosaur erotica
00:12:04.220 on Amazon Canada.
00:12:05.320 But at home, I'm just mom.
00:12:08.060 From my own parenting experience, I can tell you there's nothing more terrifying than a
00:12:12.380 teenage girl.
00:12:13.440 And right now, one teenage girl in particular is scaring the crap out of all of us.
00:12:19.280 What's your message to world leaders today?
00:12:21.880 My message is that we'll be watching you.
00:12:24.560 And she means it too.
00:12:25.820 This morning I woke up and she was standing over my bed.
00:12:28.400 That, of course, is Greta Thunberg, the 16-year-old Swedish climate activist who's been traveling
00:12:34.980 the world with one simple message.
00:12:37.300 She's just a girl standing in front of a group of world leaders asking them to do something
00:12:42.200 before the whole planet melts and we all die.
00:12:45.440 You all come to us young people for hope.
00:12:49.640 How dare you?
00:12:51.000 For more than 30 years, the science has been crystal clear.
00:12:56.440 How dare you continue to look away and come here saying that you're doing enough when the
00:13:03.720 politics and solutions needed are still nowhere in sight?
00:13:07.780 The only thing scarier than a 16-year-old girl is a 16-year-old girl with an agenda who knows 1.00
00:13:14.060 how to hold a grudge.
00:13:15.920 Greta Thunberg terrifies me and I love her for it. 1.00
00:13:20.940 Okay.
00:13:22.400 Samantha kind of ruined it there when she started trying to tell jokes. 1.00
00:13:26.540 But I did crack a smile at the Greta Thunberg clip.
00:13:32.340 Is it Thunberg?
00:13:33.120 Thunberg.
00:13:33.680 Thunberg.
00:13:34.140 Thunberg.
00:13:34.640 I've been saying Thunberg this whole time.
00:13:36.680 I'm going with Thunberg.
00:13:38.500 That one gets me.
00:13:39.380 That clip gets me every time I have to.
00:13:40.800 I'm sorry.
00:13:41.340 It does.
00:13:41.800 It's a little funny.
00:13:44.800 So we might have to count that as my Samantha Bee laugh.
00:13:47.480 I might just have to call it and say that that qualifies.
00:13:50.380 But let's see.
00:13:51.620 We'll plunge forward one more time.
00:13:54.180 Let's give this a shot.
00:13:55.780 She doesn't want to inspire us or give us hope.
00:13:58.040 She wants to give us nightmares because we deserve them. 1.00
00:14:01.920 Greta is bringing something very important to the discourse about climate change.
00:14:06.960 Shame.
00:14:08.080 She's traveled all over the world ripping into our craven leaders like a miniature Don Rickles 1.00
00:14:12.820 in braids.
00:14:13.360 And you know what?
00:14:14.140 It is working.
00:14:15.900 Her international shaming tour has led the EU to commit hundreds of billions of euros 0.74
00:14:20.220 to combating climate change.
00:14:21.640 She got the British Parliament to declare a climate emergency and pledged to zero out
00:14:25.960 its carbon emissions by 2050.
00:14:27.820 And she got the band Scorpions to finally stop rocking everyone like a hurricane.
00:14:33.260 Hurricanes are dangerous.
00:14:34.700 No.
00:14:40.100 You know what?
00:14:41.060 We're just going to...
00:14:41.760 I'm going to call it.
00:14:42.740 I can't do this anymore.
00:14:44.540 There's only so much punishment a man can take.
00:14:46.680 This is like...
00:14:47.580 This is like someone gave a microphone and a laugh track to my drunk aunt at Thanksgiving.
00:14:53.560 And I just...
00:14:54.040 I can't do it.
00:14:54.500 So the Greta Thunberg thing, that counts.
00:14:56.320 That's my laugh.
00:14:57.000 I did it.
00:14:58.160 I'm done.
00:14:59.920 Goodbye.
00:15:00.280 Goodbye.
00:15:00.380 Goodbye.
00:15:00.420 Goodbye.
00:15:01.280 Goodbye.
00:15:01.380 Goodbye.
00:15:02.380 Goodbye.
00:15:02.420 Goodbye.
00:15:03.420 Goodbye.
00:15:04.420 Goodbye.