The Matt Walsh Show - December 20, 2025


Why Is Christmas Music So God Awful Now？ I Think I Know The Reason


Episode Stats

Length

17 minutes

Words per Minute

169.79646

Word Count

3,020

Sentence Count

44

Misogynist Sentences

1

Hate Speech Sentences

7


Summary

The decline of Christmas songs and movies Illustrates the decline of faith in these areas. To give you some idea of how bad things have become around the turn of the century, here s the trailer for the new Netflix show, The Testaments.


Transcript

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00:00:30.300 The other day it was brought to my attention that radio stations and streaming services
00:00:34.080 are still broadcasting the song The Christmas Shoes,
00:00:36.920 which is the single best argument against the First Amendment that perhaps has ever been made.
00:00:41.660 Any civilized society would have imprisoned everybody responsible for that song and banned it many years ago.
00:00:48.100 And in case you're unfamiliar with it, the song is about a guy who's in a bad mood.
00:00:52.200 He's doing Christmas shopping.
00:00:53.440 And then a kid who's dressed in ragged clothing goes up to the checkout line with a bunch of pennies
00:00:58.560 and tries to buy some Christmas shoes.
00:01:00.580 Tells the clerk that his mother is dying and he wants to buy her shoes so that, you know,
00:01:04.840 she looks beautiful for Jesus.
00:01:07.580 Listen.
00:01:08.020 Sir, I want to buy these shoes for my mama, please.
00:01:16.200 It's Christmas Eve and these shoes are just her size.
00:01:22.980 Could you hurry, sir?
00:01:26.360 Daddy says there's not much time.
00:01:29.020 Now, already there are a couple of problems here beyond the very bad and melodramatic singing.
00:01:52.660 First of all, if you're buying shoes or anything, there's no reason to tell the clerk why you're making the purchase.
00:02:00.880 Like, nobody does that.
00:02:01.880 The clerk's job is to process the transaction.
00:02:04.360 That's it.
00:02:04.740 Doesn't really care why you're buying it.
00:02:06.460 Unless you're buying the ingredients for a pipe bomb or something.
00:02:08.760 There's really no explanation needed.
00:02:10.140 And secondly, the song is outdated at this point.
00:02:13.200 No kid is going to be counting pennies in the checkout line because we don't make pennies anymore.
00:02:18.380 And everyone's using Apple Pay anyway.
00:02:20.020 Now, admittedly, back in 2002, when this song came out, that wasn't true.
00:02:22.840 But it was still considered a pretty big faux pas to make everyone wait while you, quote,
00:02:28.340 counted pennies for what seemed like years.
00:02:31.120 And it's an even bigger faux pas when you come up short after all that.
00:02:35.320 And third, what kind of person, child or not, thinks that people get to keep their shoes in the afterlife?
00:02:40.780 I mean, is the kid's mom a pharaoh?
00:02:43.080 Is this ancient Egypt?
00:02:44.460 What pyramid is this woman being buried in?
00:02:46.700 And so at this point, even if you put aside the absurdity of wanting to dress up your dying mother,
00:02:53.100 everyone in line should be furious with this kid.
00:02:55.840 But then it gets worse.
00:02:56.860 As Patton Oswalt observed, the kid eventually makes it clear that he's a total scam artist.
00:03:01.960 He turns to the guy standing next to him and demands that he pays for the shoes.
00:03:06.600 Watch.
00:03:06.880 They counted pennies for what seemed like years
00:03:10.900 And the cashier said, son, there's not enough here
00:03:14.500 He searched his pockets frantically
00:03:17.480 Then he turned and he looked at me
00:03:21.520 He said, mama made Christmas good at our house
00:03:25.360 Most years she just did without
00:03:28.620 Tell me, sir, what am I going to do
00:03:32.280 Somehow I've got to buy her these Christmas shoes
00:03:37.640 So I laid the money down
00:03:42.560 I just had to help him out
00:03:46.540 If this pair of shoes costs $50
00:03:48.680 Which in 2002 was a decent amount of money
00:03:51.300 And presumably enough to buy shoes that
00:03:53.460 Wouldn't get you kicked out of heaven on the spot
00:03:55.640 Then we're talking about
00:03:57.000 5,000 pennies if this kid was counting
00:03:59.260 As the narrator says, it felt like it took years
00:04:02.600 Imagine watching that
00:04:04.880 And then the kid hits you up for more pennies
00:04:07.220 This is where you say politely but firmly
00:04:09.280 No
00:04:09.860 And you certainly don't pay for the shoes
00:04:12.200 And then declare that you've discovered the true meaning of Christmas
00:04:14.400 Which is how the song ends
00:04:16.240 But if you look into it
00:04:17.800 You'll find that this song was wildly successful
00:04:20.100 In fact, it was so successful
00:04:21.140 That it was somehow turned into a movie
00:04:23.720 And a book series
00:04:24.980 Yes, a movie and a book series
00:04:27.100 Hollywood treated this Christmas shoes song
00:04:29.360 Like it was The Hobbit
00:04:30.560 They apparently got Rob Lowe to play the angry guy at the store
00:04:33.700 Who makes the poor kid happy
00:04:35.460 And in doing so, they provided a very important illustration
00:04:37.460 Of a phenomenon I want to talk about today
00:04:39.760 Which is the decline of Christmas songs and movies
00:04:43.020 And conveniently enough
00:04:45.160 The Christmas shoes
00:04:46.480 Illustrates the decline
00:04:48.220 In both of these areas
00:04:49.620 So here's the trailer for The Christmas Shoes
00:04:51.640 To give you some idea
00:04:52.540 Of how bad things have become
00:04:54.580 Starting around
00:04:55.520 Around the turn of the century
00:04:56.760 A special pair of shoes will lead their paths to cross
00:05:01.360 You would have really liked the show
00:05:04.860 I wish you were there
00:05:06.100 I will be next time
00:05:07.860 You're $5.50 short
00:05:11.500 Come back after New Year's
00:05:13.340 We'll probably be giving them away
00:05:14.720 I don't like that
00:05:16.040 I don't like that
00:05:16.600 This Christmas
00:05:18.160 Two families
00:05:19.860 Will test their faith in themselves
00:05:23.100 Thanks, mister
00:05:24.440 And discover the magic that is
00:05:27.500 The Christmas Shoes
00:05:29.700 That you heard
00:05:30.700 Daddy says there's not much time
00:05:35.760 Now again, this is back in 2002
00:05:37.580 And Christmas movies have only deteriorated from here
00:05:41.120 There hasn't been a good Christmas movie in over 30 years
00:05:45.160 None of them appear to have any understanding of Christmas
00:05:47.920 Which is a pretty big problem for a Christmas movie
00:05:50.140 There's been an uptick in
00:05:51.520 I hate my family
00:05:52.560 Or I got a divorce
00:05:53.800 So this Christmas is going to be weird type of films
00:05:56.440 Which, you know, that's like Home Alone
00:05:59.800 But, which is a good Christmas movie
00:06:01.380 But they can't all be centered around that
00:06:03.660 The stakes are usually over the top
00:06:05.780 Where the fate of Christmas itself is on the line
00:06:08.240 And there's often, you know, unnecessary violence as well
00:06:11.200 Take your pick
00:06:12.220 Bad Santa, Red One, Elf
00:06:14.320 It's not exactly a Christmas story
00:06:15.660 It's a Wonderful Life
00:06:16.680 Miracle on 34th Street
00:06:18.800 Now, for what it's worth
00:06:20.060 Elf was originally supposed to be much raunchier
00:06:22.220 Sort of like a Christmas-themed version of old school
00:06:24.420 And that's what the studio wanted
00:06:25.860 Jon Favreau was fortunately able to prevent the studio
00:06:28.860 From making that change
00:06:29.860 But, you know, the movie
00:06:30.800 The movie is still quite bad
00:06:32.480 So, when did this trend change?
00:06:34.480 And why?
00:06:36.020 For Christmas songs
00:06:36.980 It's a very measurable decline
00:06:38.240 The vast majority of the most popular Christmas songs
00:06:40.440 Which made the Billboard Holiday 100
00:06:42.700 Or the most played holiday songs
00:06:44.440 Were written between 1942 and 1994
00:06:47.020 So, starting around 30 years ago
00:06:48.720 The music industry suddenly became incapable
00:06:51.500 Of producing a worthwhile Christmas song
00:06:54.360 And part of the explanation, we can assume
00:06:56.040 Is similar to the reason that TV shows and movies
00:06:58.980 Have declined in quality
00:07:00.920 Writers in the entertainment industry
00:07:02.140 Are mostly obsessed with political messaging
00:07:03.920 Most of which is explicitly anti-Christian
00:07:06.780 Doesn't exactly translate into creative writing
00:07:09.500 About Christmas
00:07:10.660 And more importantly
00:07:11.700 There are only so many Christmas songs
00:07:13.420 That can really exist from a practical perspective
00:07:15.300 It's a genre of music
00:07:16.840 That's only played for one month a year
00:07:18.620 So people don't need 50,000 different Christmas songs
00:07:21.560 No one's going to get burned out on Jingle Bells
00:07:24.360 In other words, the genre is
00:07:25.660 You know, you could argue
00:07:26.480 A sort of full already
00:07:27.740 And therefore, rather than risk a lot of money
00:07:30.160 On a new song that might bomb
00:07:32.740 Most entertainers are happy to sing a cover
00:07:34.680 Of well-established classics
00:07:35.820 Or they're happy to churn out garbage
00:07:37.760 Like Christmas Tree Farm by Taylor Swift
00:07:40.480 Or It Feels Like Christmas by Fallout Boy
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00:08:55.400 But it's also hard to escape
00:08:56.960 The fact that
00:08:58.040 As I mentioned previously
00:08:59.620 We've become a culture
00:09:01.680 That's obsessed with irony
00:09:02.980 And sarcasm
00:09:04.980 We're very ironically detached
00:09:07.000 From everything
00:09:08.280 Recall this scene
00:09:09.040 From Charlie Brown Christmas
00:09:10.040 In 1965
00:09:10.860 Of course a classic
00:09:12.740 Charlie asks about
00:09:14.080 The meaning of Christmas
00:09:14.900 And in response
00:09:15.720 He's told the story
00:09:17.780 Of the birth of Christ
00:09:19.380 Watch
00:09:19.940 I guess you were right Linus
00:09:22.060 I shouldn't have picked
00:09:23.080 This little tree
00:09:23.900 Everything I do
00:09:25.380 Turns into a disaster
00:09:26.520 I guess I really don't know
00:09:28.220 What Christmas is all about
00:09:29.480 Isn't there anyone
00:09:31.200 Who knows what Christmas
00:09:32.540 Is all about?
00:09:34.520 Sure Charlie Brown
00:09:35.540 I can tell you
00:09:36.320 What Christmas is all about
00:09:37.640 Lights please
00:09:40.700 And there were
00:09:44.820 In the same country
00:09:45.860 Shepherds
00:09:46.580 Abiding in the field
00:09:47.760 Keeping watch over
00:09:48.820 Their flock by night
00:09:49.920 And lo
00:09:50.660 The angel of the Lord
00:09:51.860 Came upon them
00:09:52.680 And the glory of the Lord
00:09:54.460 Shone round about them
00:09:55.620 And they were sore afraid
00:09:57.460 And the angel said unto them
00:09:59.120 Fear not
00:09:59.780 For behold
00:10:01.320 I bring you tidings
00:10:02.360 Of great joy
00:10:03.220 Which shall be to all people
00:10:04.800 For unto you
00:10:06.120 Was born this day
00:10:07.240 In the city of David
00:10:08.240 A Savior
00:10:09.500 Which is Christ the Lord
00:10:11.020 And this shall be
00:10:12.500 A sign unto you
00:10:13.520 Ye shall find the babe
00:10:15.360 Wrapped in swaddling clothes
00:10:16.800 Lying in a manger
00:10:17.980 And suddenly there was
00:10:19.840 With the angel
00:10:20.520 A multitude of the heavenly host
00:10:22.640 Praising God
00:10:23.460 And saying
00:10:24.680 Glory to God in the highest
00:10:26.600 And on earth peace
00:10:28.200 Good will toward men
00:10:29.920 That's what Christmas
00:10:37.700 Is all about
00:10:38.480 Charlie Brown
00:10:39.100 Now CBS executives
00:10:49.980 Didn't want to air that
00:10:51.300 They thought it would bomb
00:10:52.160 It's also
00:10:53.880 Not what they had in mind
00:10:54.980 They were looking
00:10:55.540 For more generic content
00:10:56.720 Which they could use
00:10:57.620 As a vehicle
00:10:58.140 To air Coca-Cola content
00:10:59.600 Since Coke was sponsoring
00:11:00.820 The show
00:11:01.160 As one of the producers
00:11:03.380 Lee Mendelsohn
00:11:04.000 Put it
00:11:04.280 I really believed
00:11:05.160 If it hadn't already
00:11:05.820 Been scheduled
00:11:06.320 For the following week
00:11:07.060 There's no way
00:11:07.920 They were going to
00:11:08.300 Broadcast that show
00:11:09.400 But because of
00:11:10.120 The tight timeline
00:11:10.840 It did air
00:11:11.840 It used actual
00:11:12.800 Child actors for voices
00:11:13.960 Didn't have a laugh track
00:11:15.580 Featured a jazz soundtrack
00:11:17.460 All choices that were
00:11:18.820 Considered extremely
00:11:19.500 Unconventional and risky
00:11:20.760 At the time
00:11:21.300 In the end of course
00:11:22.120 Charles Schultz
00:11:22.980 Was vindicated
00:11:23.800 And so was
00:11:24.920 One of his animators
00:11:25.940 Ed Levitt
00:11:26.720 Who had insisted
00:11:28.160 It would be
00:11:28.480 The best special
00:11:29.720 He'll ever make
00:11:30.240 The show is going
00:11:30.880 To run for a hundred years
00:11:32.260 Now normally
00:11:32.940 When an unconventional
00:11:33.620 Production with a unique
00:11:34.600 Message proves to be
00:11:35.400 Successful
00:11:35.860 Executives try to emulate it
00:11:37.080 But the Charlie Brown
00:11:37.900 Christmas special
00:11:38.480 Proved to be an aberration
00:11:39.760 By 1987
00:11:40.520 This kind of Christmas
00:11:41.440 Messaging
00:11:41.920 The kind that
00:11:42.440 Unironically
00:11:43.320 Sincerely reflects
00:11:45.380 The meaning of Christmas
00:11:46.360 Was replaced by
00:11:48.560 Propaganda from
00:11:49.500 Spiritual humanists
00:11:50.740 This was the message
00:11:51.760 Of the Muppet family
00:11:52.760 Christmas for example
00:11:53.720 See if you can
00:11:54.260 Spot the difference
00:11:55.060 What's Christmas?
00:11:56.060 Yeah
00:11:56.500 Oh don't you have
00:11:58.000 Christmas?
00:11:58.860 No
00:11:59.420 Well that's when you
00:12:01.080 Gather together with
00:12:02.040 The people you love
00:12:02.980 And you wish each other
00:12:04.500 Peace on earth
00:12:05.460 Oh
00:12:06.200 We have a time like that
00:12:09.340 Yes we do
00:12:10.180 As a matter of fact
00:12:11.540 We're celebrating it
00:12:12.680 Right now
00:12:13.420 You see we give each other
00:12:14.580 Little presents
00:12:15.360 I'm giving Gruber
00:12:16.860 This nice yellow pebble
00:12:18.320 And I gave Mookie
00:12:19.980 That pebble last year
00:12:21.220 And I gave it to Red
00:12:22.620 The year before that
00:12:23.400 And I gave it to you
00:12:24.560 Wembley
00:12:24.920 The year before that
00:12:26.140 That pebble's been a gift
00:12:27.940 37 times
00:12:29.180 37 times?
00:12:30.800 Yeah
00:12:31.100 So this was the beginning
00:12:32.140 Of the end
00:12:32.600 As far as Christmas movies
00:12:33.700 And shows were concerned
00:12:34.660 It's a reflection of
00:12:35.800 Culture becoming homogenous
00:12:37.460 Of every event or holiday
00:12:39.360 Being about our general happiness
00:12:41.760 You know rather than
00:12:43.480 Any deeper meaning
00:12:44.260 By the early 2000s
00:12:45.620 South Park was producing
00:12:46.520 Episodes about this tension
00:12:47.940 Over the true meaning
00:12:48.640 Of Christmas
00:12:49.040 Which seemed to really
00:12:50.380 Confuse people at the time
00:12:51.640 We meet again Jesus
00:12:53.860 You have blemished
00:12:55.420 The meaning of Christmas
00:12:56.440 For the last time Kringle
00:12:58.060 I bring happiness and love
00:12:59.980 To children all over the world
00:13:02.080 Christmas is for celebrating
00:13:03.340 My birth
00:13:04.120 Christmas is for giving
00:13:05.920 I'm here to put an end
00:13:07.620 To your blasphemy
00:13:08.660 This time we finish it
00:13:10.500 There can be
00:13:11.540 The only one
00:13:12.700 Dude this is pretty
00:13:14.860 B***ed up right here
00:13:16.220 Go Santa
00:13:28.300 Go Jesus
00:13:31.760 And you know
00:13:39.280 I think I learned
00:13:40.460 Something today
00:13:41.100 It doesn't matter
00:13:42.280 If you're Christian
00:13:43.020 Or Jewish
00:13:43.800 Or atheist
00:13:44.400 Or Hindu
00:13:44.960 Christmas still is about
00:13:46.340 One very important thing
00:13:47.920 Yeah
00:13:48.240 Ham
00:13:48.720 No not ham
00:13:49.700 You fat
00:13:50.340 You
00:13:51.400 Christmas is about
00:13:52.080 Something much more important
00:13:53.440 What?
00:13:54.340 Presents
00:13:54.740 Ah
00:13:55.360 Don't you see Kyle?
00:13:56.720 Yeah
00:13:57.120 Presents
00:13:57.780 Hey man
00:13:58.760 If you're Jewish
00:13:59.640 You get presents
00:14:00.220 For eight days
00:14:01.240 Wow really?
00:14:02.280 Count me in
00:14:03.020 Yeah I'll be a Jew too
00:14:04.280 Dreidel
00:14:04.940 Dreidel
00:14:05.440 Dreidel
00:14:06.040 I made you out of clay
00:14:07.860 Now 50 years after
00:14:09.480 Charlie Brown's Christmas
00:14:10.200 This is the kind of cartoon
00:14:11.380 That children are watching
00:14:12.960 You can make the case that
00:14:13.980 South Park has a more
00:14:15.400 Complicated plot
00:14:16.260 You could say it's funnier
00:14:17.680 And more profane
00:14:18.460 And more ironic
00:14:19.200 All that is true
00:14:19.960 But a culture that's defined
00:14:21.860 By detachment
00:14:22.740 And irony
00:14:23.960 And never wants to take
00:14:25.280 Anything seriously
00:14:26.020 At a fundamental level
00:14:27.080 Is very different from
00:14:28.120 A culture that values
00:14:29.100 Authenticity
00:14:29.800 And vulnerability
00:14:30.420 And humility
00:14:31.540 True spirituality
00:14:34.080 It produces different
00:14:35.240 Kinds of people
00:14:35.940 And different kinds of
00:14:36.580 Relationships
00:14:37.000 And ultimately
00:14:37.440 It produces
00:14:38.460 Christmas movies
00:14:39.680 Like this
00:14:40.840 It's Christmas
00:14:42.960 We should celebrate
00:14:44.480 They said
00:14:45.120 Just a little get together
00:14:50.060 For the employees
00:14:51.180 Have a few drinks
00:14:55.620 Blow off a little steam
00:14:57.380 Nothing crazy
00:14:58.900 Merry Christmas Jeremy
00:15:01.780 Great night huh?
00:15:03.500 That makes the
00:15:04.020 Christmas shoes movie
00:15:04.940 Look like a
00:15:05.580 Best picture nominee
00:15:07.100 Christmas content
00:15:08.460 Has gone from
00:15:09.160 Authentic and
00:15:10.120 Memorable
00:15:10.700 To trite
00:15:11.700 And tacky
00:15:12.400 To openly profane
00:15:14.520 And disturbing
00:15:15.120 That's the trajectory
00:15:16.200 And one of the things
00:15:17.080 That needs to change
00:15:18.020 Is that we need to
00:15:18.520 Establish a clear
00:15:19.480 Definition of a
00:15:20.300 Christmas movie
00:15:20.860 It's a cliched debate
00:15:21.840 At some level
00:15:22.640 But maybe it would
00:15:24.240 Help to spell this out
00:15:25.100 A Christmas movie
00:15:26.020 Needs to take place
00:15:26.820 On Christmas obviously
00:15:27.720 Or at least like
00:15:29.500 Needs to be centered
00:15:30.860 Around the actual
00:15:31.860 Event of
00:15:32.320 The actual day of
00:15:33.140 Christmas
00:15:33.360 The holiday of Christmas
00:15:34.020 And as I've said
00:15:36.080 Before there needs
00:15:36.580 To be snow
00:15:37.060 There needs to be
00:15:37.780 A big guy
00:15:38.580 In a bushy white beard
00:15:39.500 Like Gandalf
00:15:40.240 In the Lord of the Rings
00:15:40.980 There needs to be
00:15:41.540 Some statement
00:15:42.340 Either expressed
00:15:43.940 Or implied
00:15:44.440 About the true meaning
00:15:45.460 Of Christmas
00:15:45.880 And it needs to
00:15:46.540 Make you feel merry
00:15:47.360 Like it needs to
00:15:48.760 Actually have that
00:15:49.580 That feeling
00:15:50.280 It can't depress you
00:15:51.140 Or gross you out
00:15:51.920 It can't be about
00:15:53.260 Averting the end of the world
00:15:54.380 Or the end of Christmas
00:15:55.340 Or the death of Santa
00:15:56.660 It needs to make you feel
00:15:58.040 Like a kid
00:15:58.440 Watching Charlie Brown
00:15:59.260 In the 1960s
00:16:00.120 A country that values
00:16:01.300 Christmas movies
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00:16:02.900 Actual Christmas movies
00:16:04.000 Will be less annoying
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00:16:06.340 They won't be mystified
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00:16:10.700 They might actually remember
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00:16:24.560 For the winters
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00:16:34.760 Of what executives
00:16:35.460 Tell him to do
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