This Past Weekend with Theo Von - May 22, 2026


#659 - Ari Matti


Episode Stats


Length

1 hour and 54 minutes

Words per minute

200.02393

Word count

22,851

Sentence count

1,237

Harmful content

Misogyny

158

sentences flagged

Toxicity

586

sentences flagged

Hate speech

328

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 If your business communications are basically a burner phone and a prayer,
00:00:05.440 you know, I'm talking about missed calls, texts that nobody answered,
00:00:09.860 customers following up for the third and fourth time,
00:00:12.360 well, then obviously things are a mess.
00:00:15.580 And at some point you just, you hit that wall and you're like,
00:00:18.440 all right, I'm done with this. 0.98
00:00:20.800 Let's fucking Quo. 0.97
00:00:23.040 Today's episode is brought to you by Quo, Q-U-O, 0.99
00:00:26.500 The business communication system built so you never miss a call.
00:00:31.760 Your entire team can handle calls and texts from one shared number,
00:00:35.740 so no more missed messages or dropped conversations
00:00:38.300 or somebody's handing it off to this person and they're not receiving it.
00:00:42.120 Everyone sees the full thread.
00:00:43.980 Replies are faster and customers actually feel taken care of.
00:00:48.400 Money is on the line.
00:00:50.120 Always say hello with Quo.
00:00:52.440 Try Quo for free.
00:00:53.840 Plus, get 20% off your first six months when you go to QUO.com slash Theo.
00:01:00.720 That's QUO.com slash Theo. 0.99
00:01:04.640 Let's fucking quote. 0.98
00:01:07.120 We got a little remodel of some merch on the site. 0.99
00:01:11.340 It's our Be Good to Yourself Tease.
00:01:13.620 And we got them now.
00:01:14.500 We redid them in a scribble style that I think is, I don't know, I like it.
00:01:20.420 It's fresh.
00:01:21.360 It's something new.
00:01:21.960 i think that you'll like it as well if you want to go check that out you can
00:01:25.280 um those it's new colorways of them as well and and everything we got it all at theovonstore.com
00:01:33.080 and uh and and thank you for your support hey guys just want to let you know uh this episode
00:01:39.200 is kind of it's a little more of a raunchy-ish conversation more raunchier and um it's great
00:01:45.280 uh but it was deemed 18 and over by some platforms uh just want to let you know that
00:01:51.140 in case you're riding in the car with your kids or something like that.
00:01:55.200 Hope everybody's having a great day. Enjoy the episode.
00:01:58.420 Today's guest is a stand-up comedian.
00:02:00.960 Some people call him the Estonian Assassin
00:02:04.220 because he's from a country called Estonia.
00:02:07.760 You may have seen him on Kill Tony.
00:02:09.240 He's touring all over the country right now.
00:02:11.020 I'm grateful to spend time with Mr. Ari Matty.
00:02:21.140 You guys don't do headphones, do you?
00:02:35.040 Nah, I don't care about it, do you?
00:02:36.540 Nah, I don't know.
00:02:37.280 Joe does it.
00:02:37.800 You did Rogan's.
00:02:38.740 If it's like, if the other guy has it, then I gotta buy it.
00:02:41.460 The headphones?
00:02:42.120 Yeah.
00:02:42.700 Yeah, if one guy's wearing it, it's like being in a threesome and you're the guy that doesn't
00:02:47.080 put on, and the other guy puts a condom on.
00:02:48.540 Yeah, it's true.
00:02:51.140 you know what i'm saying like if at that point you're like oh okay then yeah you know it's kind
00:02:56.560 of like i feel like that sort of energy dude yeah uh ari maddie good to see you bro good to see you 0.67
00:03:01.900 thank you bro fuck yeah let's get it dude good to see you my friend good to see you man yeah um 0.57
00:03:06.960 how was uh how was your week international you were just performing here this week what was it 0.96
00:03:10.560 like did you get out to broadway what was some of your take of the place i've been to broadway
00:03:14.260 uh the past times i've been to nashville it's it's basically we have it's very similar to austin
00:03:19.720 But yeah, I did just saying this this time.
00:03:22.760 It was awesome.
00:03:23.320 I didn't really go to Broadway.
00:03:24.480 I stayed away from it.
00:03:26.180 But you've seen it before, right?
00:03:27.640 I mean, it's a spectacle for sure.
00:03:29.680 It's for sure a spectacle to watch people.
00:03:32.500 Last time I was on Broadway, I stepped into a puddle that, you know, when you don't know
00:03:37.000 the depth of a puddle?
00:03:38.600 Oh, yeah.
00:03:39.260 It's like, it's like almost up to my knee.
00:03:41.760 I like fell into, I fell into the sea and then I had to continue my night with a wet
00:03:46.800 foot and when you're 34 years old and you get a little like air conditioning with a wet foot
00:03:51.420 i know i'm gonna get sick oh yeah and then i was sick for two weeks oh yeah and that's some real 0.86
00:03:57.220 i mean some you'll see a puddle out there and you'll see a damn somebody fishing and you know 0.97
00:04:01.080 people when i was 19 i could jump into a fucking fountain and then get out and just party on no 0.98
00:04:06.040 issue now if my toe is wet it's gonna be a big i could i could die i could get pneumonia and 0.99
00:04:13.260 fucking die dude it is bro shit when you're oh it's crazy yeah i literally like uh i had one of 0.99
00:04:19.500 my first one of these that i slipped and i fell and i thought it's over like the pain that went 1.00
00:04:28.200 through my lower back my i literally thought it's broken like call the hospital when i was when i
00:04:34.000 was 17 i not 17 i was like 15 i had um uh i had a skateboard and i held on to the back of a bus
00:04:41.020 you know like for a ride
00:04:42.860 like in Back to the Future type of thing
00:04:44.480 yeah like in Tony Hawk Pro Skater
00:04:46.020 and then in typical bus driver form
00:04:48.820 he sped up 0.68
00:04:50.940 trying to lose me and kill me
00:04:52.420 and I went like face first 0.99
00:04:54.860 into a pavement wall
00:04:56.100 and nothing happened, you just stand up
00:04:58.700 now a badly
00:05:01.080 timed sidewalk could kill me
00:05:03.320 bro I'm such 1.00
00:05:05.180 a bitch, it's crazy 1.00
00:05:05.980 I literally got out of bed too fast 1.00
00:05:09.000 like a year ago and my hip hop
00:05:11.000 dude i can still feel it when it's cold i still feel it yeah brother i feel you and some of that
00:05:17.180 stuff is just and you don't know how to explain it to people and you don't you don't want to
00:05:20.560 explain it because it just weakens you it's like weakens if if the part of you that breaks all the
00:05:25.020 time hears you speak about it it's not good it's not because i never address it no yeah i've just
00:05:29.880 been with a blown up hip and in a cold morning that hurts like oh brother it's the littlest
00:05:37.300 things you don't even realize it's like i when i was younger i would just jump in the air now now
00:05:43.280 i have to go down a little look up yeah and then jump if you want me to jump on something give me
00:05:49.820 15 minutes i need rubber bands i need exercises i need to warm up it's crazy dude yeah yeah i need
00:05:56.700 to interview a flat earther i need to have and then and then you know when you watch like you
00:06:01.080 know when you watch like video have you seen these cranium videos now no it's like a thing where
00:06:06.040 They like, it's like a guy, he like goes into your mouth and he like releases childhood drama and then people cry on a table.
00:06:13.460 And I'm like, am I, do I need to get my cranium released?
00:06:18.220 What is it called?
00:06:19.260 Can you bring this up?
00:06:20.100 I haven't seen it.
00:06:20.780 Cranium release.
00:06:22.780 Cranial.
00:06:23.280 That's like all my feed right now.
00:06:25.260 This is cranial facial, facial release and cranial, cranial sac.
00:06:30.960 I saw one video.
00:06:31.680 It was a black guy. 1.00
00:06:32.540 They released his cranial. 0.98
00:06:33.680 He became white.
00:06:34.500 It's crazy.
00:06:35.060 Like everything in your life can be released with a cranial.
00:06:38.740 There's a lot of trauma, dude, in the culture.
00:06:40.320 There's a lot of trauma in the culture.
00:06:41.720 Bro, that's crazy. 1.00
00:06:42.820 They release you when you're fucking a woman. 1.00
00:06:44.800 Like tits just pop out of you or something. 1.00
00:06:46.680 Yeah, you get a bigger cock. 1.00
00:06:48.480 You grow taller. 0.99
00:06:51.220 It's funny when you find out stuff that it's like.
00:06:53.440 I haven't seen this.
00:06:54.220 Bring this up.
00:06:54.820 It's huge.
00:06:57.060 And who's doing it? 1.00
00:06:58.700 It's probably a mid, is it a Middle Easterner trying to do it to somebody? 1.00
00:07:01.600 See, yeah, yeah. 1.00
00:07:03.180 You know what I'm saying?
00:07:03.700 Let's say.
00:07:04.300 What the?
00:07:05.060 oh yeah oh yeah they put like a balloon up your nose and it comes out of your mouth it's all crazy 0.93
00:07:11.540 and it's part of the harlem globetrotters what is it oh yeah this is so fun bro first of all 0.98
00:07:18.740 go back 10 seconds just seeing a middle eastern guy with a skull yeah it's just it's too much i 0.90
00:07:24.880 know i know i know i know and now this lady straight she was a lesbian before and now she's 0.81
00:07:30.100 everything in your life can be fixed by cranial oh god yeah it's always like this it's kind of 0.52
00:07:37.600 like a tightly it's like a persian and like fitted figs or whatever and they're just explaining to
00:07:43.360 you like how it will save you and what do they do they put it in is there another video yeah i see 0.99
00:07:48.300 this guy he puts a fucking thumb in his mouth and he sucks on it oh well then he that's trauma then 1.00
00:07:53.940 He needs the cranial. 1.00
00:07:55.840 Look at this guy.
00:07:57.420 Oh, I've seen this.
00:07:58.460 Is this real?
00:07:59.040 I know. This is the thing.
00:08:00.900 For my cranial sacral and nervous system reset, you can reset it.
00:08:05.500 This guy's just blowing.
00:08:08.660 No, no, I think he's pushing, like, on the.
00:08:14.300 Okay, I went too deep.
00:08:16.980 Are you, you feel better? 0.99
00:08:19.620 Oh, I feel like calling somebody a faggot, but not me, though. 1.00
00:08:23.680 not me 0.99
00:08:24.340 but yeah
00:08:26.180 so I don't think
00:08:26.800 this is good for me
00:08:27.620 there's always like
00:08:28.100 new trends
00:08:28.780 where you find out
00:08:29.500 that this is what's wrong
00:08:30.280 with your life
00:08:30.820 that you haven't had
00:08:31.440 your cranial 0.99
00:08:32.240 is all fucked up 1.00
00:08:33.160 yeah 1.00
00:08:33.420 okay here we got a guy 1.00
00:08:35.120 they got a honky 0.95
00:08:35.840 laid out here
00:08:36.620 so three different openings
00:08:39.080 on each side of the nose 0.69
00:08:40.340 so we're gonna do
00:08:40.840 left lower
00:08:41.140 this is gonna be
00:08:41.480 a little cold
00:08:42.000 it's gonna be
00:08:43.360 a little weird
00:08:44.040 I feel a little weird 0.98
00:08:44.860 no shit 0.96
00:08:45.260 a little weird 0.99
00:08:45.720 he literally blows it up
00:08:47.100 I know
00:08:47.420 he literally
00:08:48.280 swells up your brain
00:08:49.760 this is crazy 0.94
00:08:51.340 I don't like any doctor
00:08:52.360 that just has
00:08:52.920 three diplomas and a word of mouth, you know?
00:08:57.540 Yeah, dude.
00:08:58.440 A word of snout. 1.00
00:09:00.140 This guy is fucking... 1.00
00:09:01.840 And you can't see at home. 1.00
00:09:02.880 They've just put a balloon into this guy's head
00:09:04.820 and then they...
00:09:05.900 Blew it up.
00:09:06.960 Blew it up with air.
00:09:07.940 He just blew up.
00:09:09.140 Did you hear that?
00:09:10.180 And now he's smiling.
00:09:12.060 In reality, that was...
00:09:13.060 Now he's straight.
00:09:15.400 There you go, dude. 0.99
00:09:17.140 Well, they had that pray in the gay out of children. 0.95
00:09:19.520 Remember, that was a big thing. 0.91
00:09:21.340 Not for us, but big in America.
00:09:23.260 In America. 1.00
00:09:23.800 Pray the gay away, pray the gay away. 1.00
00:09:25.200 Yeah. 1.00
00:09:25.600 And it's always the gayest guy telling you to pray. 1.00
00:09:27.720 And it's funny that they send you to a camp filled with 40 dudes and deep in the woods with no contact to the outside world. 1.00
00:09:34.160 Seems like a great place.
00:09:35.800 They even tell you, even God shut his eyes for this one.
00:09:38.100 Don't worry.
00:09:38.680 The next two weeks, we are free in the river, brother.
00:09:41.660 Free at last, brother. 1.00
00:09:44.060 Well, gays, you know, I grew up running. 1.00
00:09:46.180 Have you ever seen a rest area in America?
00:09:48.520 Like a pit, like a rest stop?
00:09:49.840 Yes, rest stop. 0.99
00:09:50.620 suck suck suck suck it was a big thing and they shut it down for a while they started putting like 0.99
00:09:55.720 um glyphosate in the backyard there and stuff like that they tried they tried to shut it down 1.00
00:10:00.800 but you don't stop gay people from fucking dude i'm like they don't it'll kill weeds but it's not 1.00
00:10:07.020 you know i'm saying it's not stopping you know it's not stopping some of these sexual trends 1.00
00:10:11.600 um but they had a lot of gays in our area they would meet up behind there for sure and they
00:10:17.600 they had a river back there and they'd get out, 1.00
00:10:19.380 they'd do drugs and get out in the river
00:10:20.620 and hug and everything. 1.00
00:10:21.480 Gay people love to fuck in a bush. 1.00
00:10:23.600 Like it's like- 1.00
00:10:24.440 Why?
00:10:25.480 I don't know, yeah, it's like get a hotel, it's okay now.
00:10:28.360 But it's like, when I went to,
00:10:29.540 I used to live in Vancouver,
00:10:31.720 when I moved there, literally the first night
00:10:33.520 when I moved there, I went for a walk in Stanley Park.
00:10:37.440 It's the local park next to the city.
00:10:39.780 Oh, I've been there, it's beautiful.
00:10:41.120 Oh, oh, oh.
00:10:43.320 Goes right along the water.
00:10:45.780 It's literally like you become a werewolf there.
00:10:47.500 It's like so nice and quiet.
00:10:50.140 First time I was there, I got a little high.
00:10:53.740 I was deep in the woods thinking of my own things.
00:10:55.820 And it's like so quiet and serene.
00:10:58.860 And then I'm like, I take my shirt off.
00:11:01.700 It's like sunny.
00:11:02.420 I got some sun on my head.
00:11:03.440 I got a little tan going.
00:11:04.640 I do a little push-ups.
00:11:05.400 I do a little shadow boxing.
00:11:06.600 I'm alone in the woods.
00:11:07.960 Okay, of course.
00:11:08.820 It was natural, yeah.
00:11:09.600 It was natural. 0.97
00:11:10.080 You do a little push-ups.
00:11:10.960 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:11:11.600 This is like a deleted scene from the Bible, I feel like.
00:11:13.920 But let's hear more.
00:11:14.900 I want to hear more about it.
00:11:17.020 Deleted scene from the Bible.
00:11:18.780 They said, bro, if you and me made deleted scenes from the Bible? 1.00
00:11:22.320 Now that's funny. 0.96
00:11:23.300 Deleted scenes from the Bible is a funny concept.
00:11:26.760 Anyway, I interrupted you.
00:11:28.820 I'm doing a little push-ups.
00:11:30.000 I'm getting a little glisten going. 0.99
00:11:32.040 Then I see a guy walking past, and when a guy's trying to fuck, 0.99
00:11:37.740 it's a look they have. 0.99
00:11:38.920 It's just the way they move.
00:11:41.060 He's walking one way, but he's looking at me like this.
00:11:43.520 He's got his sunglasses on, but he's peeking over the sunglasses, right?
00:11:48.560 Right.
00:11:49.180 So everything he's doing, he's doing something separate.
00:11:51.120 Like he's walking one way, but looking another way.
00:11:53.440 He's got sunglasses on, but he's got them down and looking over.
00:11:55.780 So he's...
00:11:56.520 He's establishing contact.
00:11:58.500 First contact.
00:11:59.380 Yes, sir.
00:11:59.980 Yes, he is.
00:12:00.880 He keeps walking.
00:12:02.780 I keep boxing.
00:12:04.720 Now you're boxing harder. 1.00
00:12:06.220 Yeah, I'm trying to be like, look at this shit. 1.00
00:12:08.420 You don't want none of this. 1.00
00:12:09.580 and then
00:12:11.140 five minutes go back
00:12:13.060 he comes out of another bush
00:12:14.300 like I hear like a crack
00:12:15.680 and I'm like
00:12:16.200 now he's closer
00:12:17.300 so now
00:12:19.260 I take my music out
00:12:21.060 because I need all my senses
00:12:22.160 this is
00:12:22.820 this might be an ambush
00:12:24.660 there might be several of them
00:12:25.800 this is like a room of mirrors
00:12:27.120 like
00:12:27.920 which is the real guy 1.00
00:12:29.260 trying to fuck me dude 1.00
00:12:30.460 oh that's crazy 1.00
00:12:31.580 yeah yeah
00:12:31.960 so I need all my senses
00:12:32.900 that'd be a cool game
00:12:33.900 so I'm like
00:12:34.420 trying to get sober
00:12:35.360 I like throw some water on my face
00:12:36.900 I need to be sharp
00:12:37.620 I put my backpack on 0.99
00:12:39.480 I'm about to, I'm about to, I have to fuck my way out of this forest. 0.99
00:12:42.280 Yeah, you fix your hip really quick, yeah. 0.99
00:12:44.140 Oh, yeah, I start warming up.
00:12:46.620 So then he comes, hey, man.
00:12:48.660 And I try to give him a hey, man, but not a hey, man, not a friendly one.
00:12:52.380 I give him a hey, man, like a little.
00:12:55.460 Right, like what are we doing here?
00:12:57.040 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:12:58.760 Hey, man.
00:12:59.560 Hey, man.
00:13:00.920 He goes, you want a beer?
00:13:02.160 I go, nah, I don't want a beer.
00:13:05.160 Yeah.
00:13:05.760 Then I realize, oh, oh, he's out here.
00:13:08.420 And then he disappears.
00:13:10.640 I change location.
00:13:13.820 Different guy.
00:13:15.220 Like another one.
00:13:17.240 Backpack.
00:13:17.980 He's looking like he's been in the woods for days looking for Dick.
00:13:21.400 Wow.
00:13:22.280 And this new guy.
00:13:24.840 Like, where's Dick, though?
00:13:26.660 Yeah.
00:13:27.020 Kind of like where's Waldo, but a little different.
00:13:28.580 Like, where's Dick, though?
00:13:29.300 And he walks past.
00:13:30.160 Same look.
00:13:31.120 Just a full eye contact. 0.99
00:13:32.760 And now I see there's a cock hanging from him. 0.99
00:13:35.520 He's got it out. 0.99
00:13:36.700 He's got it out.
00:13:37.760 Oh.
00:13:38.420 Oh, maybe he heard.
00:13:40.440 Yeah.
00:13:40.800 Maybe like down at the base.
00:13:44.120 Like that was the messenger.
00:13:45.460 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:13:46.040 We got one.
00:13:47.160 Yeah, yeah.
00:13:47.880 And it's kind of on me.
00:13:48.720 I mean, I'm a little like a gay superhero. 0.51
00:13:51.140 I will say. 0.69
00:13:51.480 I know.
00:13:52.120 It's kind of on me, by the way.
00:13:53.320 Yeah, you're like a piece of bait in the woods.
00:13:55.200 You've set your shadow boxing, which shadow boxing is, but here's what it gives, I think.
00:14:00.040 It gives this idea, oh, I wish somebody else were here with me.
00:14:03.440 Exactly.
00:14:03.800 Oh, the shadow.
00:14:05.400 I need someone to be the shadow.
00:14:07.040 Right. 0.97
00:14:07.760 So then the guy just paints himself black
00:14:09.420 and it starts just like laying connected to your feet. 1.00
00:14:11.440 Then I see his cock. 1.00
00:14:12.560 Now I'm kind of... 1.00
00:14:13.460 And both of, by the way,
00:14:14.980 you know what I was offended? 1.00
00:14:16.420 Both those guys looked like absolute ass. 1.00
00:14:20.380 Like 50 years old. 1.00
00:14:22.080 I'm a beautiful angel.
00:14:23.680 I'm like 26 years old at my prime.
00:14:25.840 I'm doing shadow boxing. 1.00
00:14:27.420 Even if I fuck you, 1.00
00:14:29.300 the others would never believe you. 1.00
00:14:31.820 Dude, I would be like a myth 1.00
00:14:33.680 that they talk about in the gay circle for years. 1.00
00:14:35.960 there's this blue eyed yeah if you stay in stanley park long enough an angel will appear 0.96
00:14:42.220 so god dang bro and i'm like and it's funny it's my first time being like kind of like sexually 0.58
00:14:50.220 assaulted i would say and it's funny it kind of put things into perspective for me as well how 0.98
00:14:56.100 like it's not tell it it's it's it's not that i can't beat the fuck out of you i'm not in day i 0.97
00:15:04.420 don't feel threatened like a woman with a bigger man would in that situation right but the fact 1.00
00:15:10.940 you're like showing me your cock makes me feel like a bitch you know it's like let me think 1.00
00:15:17.740 about it for a second like if i've ever seen somebody's cock like how did i feel about it 1.00
00:15:22.360 he was like shaking he was like giving a little shake and like looking straight into my eyes 0.96
00:15:26.940 oh i didn't know all that that's a lot that's like it's almost come on boy okay you know it's
00:15:33.980 Like, wow, you know?
00:15:36.280 That's like a dog treat or something.
00:15:38.180 I know.
00:15:39.300 So that I could understand.
00:15:40.820 You feel like, oh, like you're being summoned or something maybe. 0.99
00:15:44.320 And the cock he had, it looked like it's been through a hole. 0.99
00:15:49.160 Like, I don't know, his last partner was a train or like heavy. 1.00
00:15:52.920 His last partner was a long winter.
00:15:57.220 That's pretty wild, brother.
00:15:59.140 So he keeps, and I literally don't know what to say.
00:16:01.720 I act like it's none of my biz. 0.97
00:16:03.980 what do you mean how do you act like someone's cock isn't in your business i know how you do 0.79
00:16:07.640 because that's what we do all the time it's us in the woods i don't even i'm never so i keep 0.92
00:16:12.300 walking like fast and i look over now i'm getting like nervous they're circling me who are they i
00:16:18.500 don't know are you sure i'm alone there's no reception i'm in stanley park the woods are high
00:16:23.160 the the sun doesn't even the trees are so high the sun is in a reach we're down in the if i even if i
00:16:29.700 yell help
00:16:30.920 it's over and now is this Palantir
00:16:33.980 doing this like who do you think is doing this
00:16:35.500 this is an organization and I'm hot
00:16:37.860 I try to find my
00:16:41.920 way out and I
00:16:43.220 oh my god I stumble on this tree stump
00:16:45.960 you know like a tree stump oh yeah for sure
00:16:47.940 I've seen them
00:16:48.480 80 to a
00:16:51.760 160 amount of
00:16:53.980 condoms like on the floor
00:16:55.420 just this mass of used up condoms
00:16:57.880 like the wailing wall or whatever
00:16:59.160 Yeah, exactly. 1.00
00:17:01.180 Maybe this is the stump, you know, Jews kiss the rock or whatever. 1.00
00:17:05.100 Yeah, but it's more like gay Jews. 1.00
00:17:06.500 This is their stump. 1.00
00:17:08.960 Where they hump the stump kind of or something.
00:17:11.780 And I'm trying to find a trail, the way out.
00:17:14.420 Just before I get to the trail, after the stump, my heart is racing. 0.98
00:17:17.980 I'm now like, what the fuck is happening? 0.95
00:17:19.760 How did I find this deep in the woods? 0.97
00:17:22.200 And then I see in the bush, the two guys, the one guy with the glasses, the beer guy, 0.98
00:17:29.160 And then the other guy with the cock. 0.99
00:17:30.800 The wiener guy. 1.00
00:17:32.400 I see them in the distance. 1.00
00:17:34.040 Mm-mm.
00:17:35.100 Blah, blah, blah. 0.68
00:17:36.820 Blah, blah.
00:17:37.740 Doing what? 0.99
00:17:38.520 Blowjobbing? 0.98
00:17:40.160 I wish this was our job.
00:17:41.800 This wasn't a job.
00:17:42.760 This was holding hair. 0.77
00:17:44.160 Oh.
00:17:44.600 Oh, God.
00:17:45.560 Oh, God. 0.99
00:17:46.180 Like dick slavery or whatever? 1.00
00:17:47.840 Dick, this was slavery. 1.00
00:17:49.640 Blah, blah, blah. 0.99
00:17:51.720 God, brother.
00:17:53.360 And the guy banging the other guy's mouth, he, like, makes eye contact.
00:17:58.340 The chef, they call that guy.
00:18:03.280 Yes, the chef.
00:18:04.260 Okay.
00:18:05.380 And he's cooking up a meal.
00:18:08.320 Mom!
00:18:08.960 Mom!
00:18:09.360 Okay, keep going.
00:18:11.180 Sorry, some of the sounds are making some...
00:18:12.760 I don't want the neighbors knocking, dude.
00:18:14.240 Because you know it's like...
00:18:16.040 No, but go on.
00:18:17.760 And he makes eye contact with me.
00:18:19.340 Why do they keep doing that?
00:18:20.840 I know, it's crazy.
00:18:21.600 He's like, you want something?
00:18:22.460 Ah!
00:18:23.380 So I turn around, I find a road,
00:18:24.900 and then I see another guy on the trail,
00:18:27.140 and I'm already giving him
00:18:28.260 a weird like
00:18:28.920 stay away from him
00:18:30.300 then I realized
00:18:31.340 and then I saw his family
00:18:32.520 it's just a German guy 1.00
00:18:33.300 looking for
00:18:33.760 and I wanted to tell him
00:18:35.120 like
00:18:35.360 ein schuldigung
00:18:36.880 nein
00:18:37.380 don't go there
00:18:38.700 yeah yeah
00:18:39.200 and then I get out of the woods
00:18:41.340 and then I
00:18:41.800 then of course
00:18:43.300 immediately I go on Reddit
00:18:44.500 and Facebook groups 1.00
00:18:45.780 that's the suck and fuck stump 1.00
00:18:47.480 I was literally like 0.99
00:18:49.160 have you seen The Grey
00:18:49.880 with Liam Neeson
00:18:51.420 have you seen The Grey
00:18:52.160 The Grey
00:18:52.880 remember when he fights the wolves
00:18:54.800 I haven't seen it
00:18:55.660 I've seen the advertisement for it
00:18:56.920 but I didn't fall for it yet, but I will soon.
00:18:58.360 It's like a movie where he fights wolves
00:18:59.800 because they keep attacking him.
00:19:01.220 And then at the end of the movie, you find out
00:19:02.780 the whole time he's been trying to escape the wolves. 0.94
00:19:05.080 See, this is me with the gay guy. 1.00
00:19:06.620 Look, look, look. 0.99
00:19:07.220 Look, this is me with the gay man. 0.97
00:19:08.920 God. 0.99
00:19:09.400 Yeah, he's trying to escape the wolves,
00:19:11.160 but then at the end of the movie,
00:19:12.100 he goes to the nest of the wolves,
00:19:14.620 which they're most protected.
00:19:15.800 That's how I felt.
00:19:17.120 Like you were in the swarm.
00:19:19.260 It's almost like you had somehow found your way
00:19:20.960 through the honeycomb to the queen bee.
00:19:22.700 Yeah, and then for a year, if I did stand-up,
00:19:24.820 I always talked about that experience.
00:19:26.200 And whenever I said, first time I came to Vancouver, I went to Stanley Park. 0.99
00:19:29.980 And everyone already laughs because they know it's a suck and fuck push. 0.99
00:19:33.520 And it's called Stanley Park? 1.00
00:19:35.220 Well, it's crazy because they have one in Pittsburgh called Shenley Park. 0.99
00:19:39.180 And they fucked there too. 0.99
00:19:40.340 And there used to be rumors of like different quarterbacks for the Steelers going up there and doing male on male sexual. 0.99
00:19:49.740 And then they had, but bring up, yeah, can we get a Reddit or like a Google review?
00:19:54.220 let's go to google review of stanley or park and just get a go down that for you privately and see
00:19:59.560 if you get any if people are reporting um you know kind of gay activities over there reporting
00:20:06.260 gay activities well it used to be like like to go and i'm sorry you went through that and when i was 0.58
00:20:13.300 a kid across that river so where the rest area was across from that they had a lot of men like 0.99
00:20:18.900 kind of straight men or people that worked in like construct like semi-straight people that worked
00:20:23.420 like in mechanics, you know, a mechanics assistant or construction or something.
00:20:28.380 They would, they have one of those, like those slingshot things, the big ones, and they would
00:20:32.960 shoot potatoes across, because I grew up on the other side of the river across from the
00:20:36.160 rest area.
00:20:36.780 Okay.
00:20:37.320 So we'd get out there when we were kids with binoculars and watch like the guys do dope
00:20:40.560 and then hug in the water.
00:20:42.280 And hug in the water.
00:20:43.260 Yeah.
00:20:43.520 I mean, it really was like a deleted team from the Bible. 0.96
00:20:45.880 Dude, that's another one we have now.
00:20:47.580 So it was like, but some of the adult men would fire a potato.
00:20:50.980 If they got too close, they'd fire a tot over at them. 0.98
00:20:53.420 to get them to separate you know so it's like this crazy shit that went on but 0.97
00:20:58.620 i think it is interesting when you get around the woods and when you get back to nature 0.95
00:21:03.180 like how sexuality is really close right there for sure yeah and it's also like
00:21:09.020 there's for sure the thrill of like like i have a gay friend of mine he's like older and he says 0.99
00:21:14.620 they he says oh yeah there's all kinds of underground suck and fuck clubs and they 0.99
00:21:18.540 they fuck in the bush oh my it's because you know men want to be a little perverted but we have to 1.00
00:21:23.640 when we bang women we have to we have to they're angels you know so we have to like that's a good 1.00
00:21:29.540 point but if there's two guys really we want to make it oh yeah it's like i want to throw you 1.00
00:21:35.020 halfway through a window i want to fuck your mouth in the bush you know that's what i want to do and 1.00
00:21:41.460 guess what he wants to do that too oh my god yeah oh here's a note somebody right here said 1.00
00:21:48.380 I masturbate in Stanley Park, and I'm sorry. 0.92
00:21:52.000 Anyone who stumbled into me doing that, 0.95
00:21:54.440 but I don't do it in front of people,
00:21:56.300 I am not a sex offender.
00:21:57.700 So this is somebody just clear in the air.
00:22:00.760 Do you see how rough that note looked? 0.99
00:22:02.820 Holy shit, dude. 0.99
00:22:04.200 Yeah, it says, 1.00
00:22:05.420 Historically, Stanley Park has served as a gay cruising location
00:22:07.600 with secluded trails near the Lost Lagoon and forest areas.
00:22:11.680 You could have been in the Lost Lagoon, my brother.
00:22:13.440 I know, I was very lost.
00:22:15.280 But I could see this also.
00:22:16.880 You were in the park for a couple days,
00:22:18.380 and it could change your sexuality.
00:22:20.400 Do you feel like something like that could happen?
00:22:21.960 Like nature's just such a ground
00:22:23.500 where something different can happen.
00:22:25.240 The woods is always like a mysterious place.
00:22:27.480 Mysterious, mysterious place.
00:22:29.120 Like even when you were a kid and you would go there,
00:22:32.200 it was just like, you know what I'm saying?
00:22:33.460 That's where like anything, there were monsters. 0.85
00:22:35.640 There was porn hidden. 0.87
00:22:36.780 Yeah, yeah.
00:22:37.180 Yeah, there was like-
00:22:38.120 I smoked my first cigarette in the bush.
00:22:39.900 It all happened in there.
00:22:41.260 I had my first piece of alcohol in the bush.
00:22:42.980 It's always like there's a tree house, first kisses.
00:22:46.920 There's people living in it.
00:22:47.920 some guy just living there and you're like just guy yeah living in the woods yeah there's just a
00:22:51.980 lot that happens there and i think there always has been it's a very mysterious place and i think
00:22:57.560 gay people used to not be able to just be gay now exactly so that's the that's like i guess it's
00:23:02.940 like a it's like a throwback to them of like yeah when times were not simpler but different 0.99
00:23:07.960 more exhilarating i guess oh for sure dude i think being gay now would seem very i mean it's boring 0.60
00:23:15.160 now i agree my neighbor says he's gay i'm like yeah i'm straight i'm i'm tall yeah who gives a 0.65
00:23:21.020 fuck yeah you're you're yeah yeah i wear yeah i wear an 11 you know i was like i'm from like oh 0.97
00:23:26.200 my god like that friend i was talking about who who i ask all these gay questions i have like one 0.99
00:23:30.400 gay confidant okay i ask him all kinds of gay in the u.s no he's estonian and he doesn't get
00:23:35.540 offended i can ask him whatever i want okay and you're from estonia i want to i want to ask you
00:23:39.380 about that i want to get into that but this is before you go on so he's like in his 50s you know
00:23:44.020 Okay, so he's an adult.
00:23:44.900 He's a fully activated.
00:23:45.680 So he grew up, like, if you grow up gay in San Francisco,
00:23:50.580 how hard is it to come out of the closet in San... 0.99
00:23:53.480 Parents, you probably get a benefit.
00:23:56.080 You know, you probably get a, yeah.
00:23:57.620 You get a group, you have a support group,
00:23:59.520 you have all these friends, your parents are happy.
00:24:01.720 Yeah, you get like a special meta login or something.
00:24:04.060 Yeah, you start stand-up,
00:24:05.140 you get a Netflix deal within a year,
00:24:07.100 you get a podcast.
00:24:08.520 That is true, dude.
00:24:09.320 I know.
00:24:09.620 You get a podcast given to you,
00:24:11.420 and suddenly you're on the charts no matter what.
00:24:13.280 Yeah. It's like, who was the famous transition? The athlete who went, now it's a she.
00:24:21.420 Prefontaine or whatever? 1.00
00:24:22.380 No, no, no. It's the famous family.
00:24:24.360 Caitlyn Jenner.
00:24:24.840 Caitlyn Jenner.
00:24:25.740 Yes, Caitlyn Jenner.
00:24:26.740 So for her, multi-millionaire coming out of the closet immediately on Forbes or Times
00:24:32.500 image, woman of the year. It's like a, for her transitioning, I mean, transitioning for
00:24:39.060 a millionaire in Hollywood, how hard can it be? 1.00
00:24:41.560 right now imagine being gay during like the soviet union you have to suck cock in the shadows like 1.00
00:24:48.840 a secret agent yeah dude now that's exhilarating double o slurping dude that's got to be crazy 0.99
00:24:55.360 like gay in san francisco is one thing that's not homosexual in the 80s soviet union 1980s 1.00
00:25:02.580 now that's he sucked dick risking his life now he loves cock I don't know if he loves 1.00
00:25:10.780 but he loves he either loves cock or he likes mysteries that end in cock you know what I'm 1.00
00:25:16.500 saying I guess dude imagine that bro like imagine first of all you find out you're gay because I 0.99
00:25:24.140 don't even know how people find out like I don't know if you get like a thing in the mail or
00:25:27.320 whatever because it's like some people I think would never even know like if you're like maybe
00:25:31.760 if you're uneducated you think you're just like watching your buddies you know trying to peek
00:25:35.880 i mean i don't even know what some people think but yes dude a long time ago and you're like oh
00:25:41.920 my god and you cannot let anybody know nobody and then imagine imagine what you've been you've been
00:25:49.680 like in the closet closet this is in the closet this is a bank vault yes you're being very deep
00:25:54.780 because you're in the hamper and he told me he told me i was like so when did you and he's like 0.73
00:25:58.740 man I always knew it but I hid it so deep in me you know and he was like drug addict drinking
00:26:04.900 he was even like um he told me when he was younger he was kind of violent against women
00:26:09.140 because you know you hate yourself and when you hate yourself you hate the world around you you
00:26:14.820 know he probably didn't even know it either no he said he knew but but but he never explored it
00:26:21.420 and then he said he was like what happened maybe like 25 or something yeah I think it was something
00:26:27.360 like that he goes to a party in finland finland is a ferry ride right across from estonia and it's
00:26:33.960 not the soviet union so it's a bit more you know and also nobody knows you there oh it's a bit more
00:26:40.400 kind of like uh nouveau rich or risque and he was in a nightclub and he took a ferry there so even a
00:26:46.880 ferry ride that will stimulate the ocean yeah the ocean within and you're you're abroad nobody knows
00:26:55.300 me here and he said he was in like a bar and he said a guy looked at him in a way that no one has 0.99
00:27:01.580 ever looked at him and he knows that look and they just suck and fuck for like three days in 0.96
00:27:08.500 a hotel room oh my god i thought the story was gonna be a little i thought it was like gonna 0.98
00:27:11.200 be a bigger moment between that part they just went to the hotel and that's what's his first
00:27:15.180 like experience no you know and he talks to this guy and this guy's yeah it's fine like this is
00:27:20.060 like you're a person, it's fine.
00:27:22.420 Yeah, you're Finnish.
00:27:23.260 Yeah, you're Finnish, yeah.
00:27:24.640 Finnish on me.
00:27:26.680 And then he went back to Estonia,
00:27:28.120 had to hide it for a little while. 1.00
00:27:29.540 So it's like those gay guys, 0.99
00:27:31.100 when I look at like a 50-plus-year-old gay man, 0.91
00:27:33.740 to be gay in the 80s, 1.00
00:27:35.040 you had to fight for your right to suck dick. 1.00
00:27:37.660 That's a gay man. 1.00
00:27:39.020 Heroes.
00:27:39.580 Yeah, that's a hero.
00:27:40.760 That's, you know.
00:27:42.380 That's the Navy.
00:27:43.400 Yeah, that's literally,
00:27:44.280 you're already, yeah, yeah.
00:27:45.040 You're growing up in the Marines.
00:27:46.520 Yeah, and sorry,
00:27:47.700 the Marines might take offense.
00:27:48.920 I think the Navy will be okay if we say that.
00:27:50.960 And no offense if anybody is being gay or not or in the Marines or whatever.
00:27:55.620 But, yeah, dude, I talk about that.
00:27:56.840 Actually, I just taped a special the other day, and I have a bit about that.
00:27:59.640 I mean, everybody has a bit about a lot of these things.
00:28:01.700 But, yeah, dude.
00:28:02.740 And with Caitlyn, too, you know, it's like she's like an icon in America.
00:28:06.820 We had a trans bass player in a band.
00:28:10.580 It was all chicks in a band, famous Estonian band.
00:28:13.220 And one guy, the bass player, was a guy. 1.00
00:28:15.380 But he always wore, like, skirts and shit. 0.99
00:28:18.100 Okay. 1.00
00:28:18.360 And then eventually he transitioned. 0.93
00:28:19.940 So like women's paraphernalia or whatever, skirts, braziers. 0.99
00:28:23.960 Braziers.
00:28:24.640 And then he transitioned like early 2000s.
00:28:28.120 And in Estonia at that time, we were all like, we don't even know what to go to an Estonian doctor.
00:28:34.880 Yeah.
00:28:35.380 Who usually does, gives you a little like paracetamol when you have a headache.
00:28:40.400 Yeah.
00:28:40.860 Like these are, yeah.
00:28:41.680 People can't even do this in Estonia.
00:28:43.320 Exactly. 0.72
00:28:43.800 So to get a sex change.
00:28:45.100 And to tell a doctor.
00:28:46.260 Yeah.
00:28:46.480 shove half of it off
00:28:47.960 the other half
00:28:48.560 you just
00:28:49.120 like cut half of it out
00:28:51.700 shove the other half in 1.00
00:28:52.860 build me a pussy 1.00
00:28:53.820 build me a Soviet pussy 1.00
00:28:55.320 oh yeah 1.00
00:28:56.480 and they were like
00:28:57.420 I remember he was even
00:28:58.680 in the news
00:28:59.240 she was even in the
00:29:00.820 I mean at that time 1.00
00:29:01.740 build me a Soviet pussy dude 1.00
00:29:03.820 that's 1.00
00:29:04.580 bro
00:29:04.840 that's the name of the musical
00:29:05.960 we're gonna write
00:29:06.660 okay
00:29:07.480 that's the name of the musical
00:29:08.980 and there was like
00:29:10.240 a news article 0.90
00:29:10.700 that she was in the grocery store
00:29:12.120 in Estonia
00:29:12.700 so this
00:29:13.300 it originally was a man
00:29:14.240 and then he transitioned
00:29:14.980 yeah
00:29:15.320 okay 1.00
00:29:15.580 then she was in the store 0.99
00:29:16.360 and she was in
00:29:16.960 there was a news article
00:29:17.720 she was in the grocery store
00:29:18.960 and some guys are drunk
00:29:20.660 and they're yelling 1.00
00:29:21.200 f*** and shit 1.00
00:29:22.140 you know 1.00
00:29:22.580 and you know what she did 1.00
00:29:23.760 took the heels off 1.00
00:29:24.820 and went f***ing factory settings 0.96
00:29:26.360 and just started beating up 1.00
00:29:27.580 she went 1.00
00:29:28.500 that's 0.99
00:29:29.560 now that's someone
00:29:30.600 who stands up
00:29:31.680 for gay rights 0.90
00:29:33.360 yeah
00:29:33.760 you know
00:29:34.460 if you're a millionaire
00:29:35.780 you go to a private clinic
00:29:37.000 you know
00:29:37.620 that's easy
00:29:38.260 that's an easy turn
00:29:39.000 you're a hero
00:29:39.640 yeah
00:29:40.300 and those rich people
00:29:41.520 they'll even get like a 1.00
00:29:42.520 a pretty pussy 1.00
00:29:43.880 yeah or a weekend cock 1.00
00:29:45.400 you know 1.00
00:29:45.640 just give me something
00:29:46.240 i can put on for the weekend yeah you know they'll get something with earrings on it it's like this 0.97
00:29:50.560 is unreal i'm talking about the freaking day-to-day blue collar potato pussy the glasgow scotland 1.00
00:29:58.420 pussy yeah exactly good day sir yeah exactly yeah the vagina that even like if you look at it if you 1.00
00:30:05.620 look at it two times at least one of those times it still kind of looks like a cock for sure yeah 1.00
00:30:10.520 yeah you just yeah that's what i'm talking about like it's just doing its best yeah i want to let
00:30:17.760 you know about shopify hands down it's the best place to start and to grow your business these
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00:30:35.500 everything. You own it. It's your store. It's your community. They just help. They did it for us.
00:30:42.680 I didn't know if I could have a merch shop and Shopify made it. Yes, I can. We can do this. We
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00:31:01.200 google youtube tiktok shop the shop app even chat gpt heck if they could might even be able to set
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00:32:24.880 dude you so you're from estonia so let's bring up estonia because it to a lot of people or i'm not
00:32:33.080 gonna say that i've always it sounded like a fictional place like i remember when i was a kid
00:32:37.980 i heard the the word kalamazoo right and it sounds like a place dr seuss would have made up or
00:32:42.880 something is it a place it's a place in michigan but i didn't know kalamazoo kalamazoo right it
00:32:47.380 sounds like yeah that sounds like uh like a candy or yes it sounds like a candy that pops in your
00:32:52.960 mouth yes the Kalamazoo and uh and I but then I was in an airport one time I was probably 16 years
00:32:59.320 old I'm in the airport and I saw Kalamazoo and I was like no way it's a real place never had an
00:33:03.660 idea so Estonia seems like a place that almost seems like something out of um I guess it's Game
00:33:09.440 of Thrones or something yes we get that but it gets confusing because I can't if somebody said
00:33:14.160 describe Estonia I'd have no idea what it is how to spend a weekend in Tallinn is that the capital
00:33:18.500 Yeah.
00:33:19.680 Wow.
00:33:20.720 It's like Kalamazoo is like my subway.
00:33:23.100 You know the sandwich shop subway?
00:33:25.660 Yes.
00:33:26.260 We had one subway in Estonia.
00:33:28.460 When I was like 16, I went there every day.
00:33:30.220 And I thought, so cool of a family restaurant.
00:33:33.520 Name it Subway because the sandwich looks like a subway.
00:33:35.980 I did my birthday there.
00:33:37.660 And then I went for like a trip to Sweden and I saw another subway. 0.99
00:33:41.260 It broke my fucking heart. 0.99
00:33:42.720 I thought this was like a family restaurant. 1.00
00:33:44.720 Yeah.
00:33:45.500 Oh, dude, it's beautiful.
00:33:46.840 I mean, just picturing somebody doing their birthday there.
00:33:49.400 In a subway, yeah.
00:33:50.500 It's beautiful, dude.
00:33:51.400 And I'll say this, too.
00:33:53.020 I dated a girl that worked at a subway, and I remember I'd go in there,
00:33:58.140 and she'd hug me.
00:33:58.880 She'd have those hand covers on, and she would hug me when she had them on.
00:34:02.320 Did she smell after her shift?
00:34:03.900 She smelled the subway a bit.
00:34:05.220 Oh, beautiful.
00:34:06.240 The Asiago, when they came out with that Asiago bread,
00:34:08.360 people didn't know what to do. 1.00
00:34:09.580 I used to bang a girl from McDonald's.
00:34:11.340 Okay, that's different. 1.00
00:34:12.300 She quit McDonald's.
00:34:14.920 She had been quit.
00:34:15.940 She hadn't been working there for six months 1.00
00:34:18.100 What the sex was so good she quit McDonald's 1.00
00:34:20.080 You're telling me 0.99
00:34:20.580 That's insane bro
00:34:22.800 And I would go to her place
00:34:26.440 Six months later
00:34:28.060 Her apartment still smells
00:34:30.680 Like the fries
00:34:31.760 That was such a mystery dude
00:34:36.180 Like at certain ages
00:34:37.820 When you're still going over
00:34:39.400 To strangers homes 0.98
00:34:41.920 For sex 0.99
00:34:42.960 That's a crazy experience 0.75
00:34:45.400 especially if they live with a lot of other people
00:34:47.300 or you don't know who they live with
00:34:48.940 or there's an animal there.
00:34:50.280 You have to like first defend yourself against the animal
00:34:52.460 or you have to like placate the animal.
00:34:54.600 You have to get down close to it, 0.63
00:34:55.740 lie in its ears, tell it lies.
00:34:57.860 And so, you know what I'm saying?
00:34:58.560 It's like you have to get past the wizard, you know? 1.00
00:35:00.720 You always know if it's a whore, 1.00
00:35:01.920 if the dog is too friendly. 1.00
00:35:03.880 You know, the dog is like giving you water
00:35:06.060 like you're doing a podcast.
00:35:07.360 Just you wait here. 0.99
00:35:08.720 They'll let you know when she's ready.
00:35:10.720 Yeah, dude. 1.00
00:35:12.620 That's it, you know, it's a fucking whore. 1.00
00:35:13.780 The dog's like, take a number out of one of those little machines. 1.00
00:35:16.160 Yeah, yeah.
00:35:16.620 If the dog attacks you, that's how you know.
00:35:18.640 Yeah, that's a good sign, bro.
00:35:19.520 That's how you know.
00:35:20.260 You're right, dude.
00:35:21.280 That's great.
00:35:22.160 Dude, one time I went into a- 1.00
00:35:24.400 If he brings you the condom, you know, in his mouth, it's like, oh, fuck. 1.00
00:35:28.400 Yeah. 1.00
00:35:28.680 And if he can take it off for you, that's insane, dude.
00:35:33.140 Yeah.
00:35:34.400 And bro, dude, one time I went on this thing called Semester at Sea.
00:35:38.040 So it's like a floating school that's on a campus.
00:35:40.280 It's a floating college.
00:35:41.700 Floating college.
00:35:42.800 Yeah, bring it up.
00:35:43.780 what semester at sea my friend got me on this it's it was for like fancy people right and oh my god
00:35:52.460 this is such a if my daughter ever said i'm going to a semester at sea oh my god i mean this is a 0.96
00:36:00.080 sock and fuck boat i mean i think my sweet baby angel is stuck at sea no look even a helicopter 0.99
00:36:06.400 can't access you holy fuck this is worse than taken now brother there's a lot of education 1.00
00:36:10.760 I'd rather send my daughter to France. 0.99
00:36:13.320 This is worse than taking. 1.00
00:36:14.560 Well, in France, they'll fuck her, but softly, you know. 1.00
00:36:16.600 It's like very, they can't even really get the job done. 1.00
00:36:21.960 But no, we went on this, and I got a job.
00:36:25.860 I worked in the bookstore, and my college, like all my college stuff applied to it.
00:36:29.360 So in the end, it wasn't very expensive.
00:36:31.840 And like I got like, you know, different like little loans you can get.
00:36:34.460 Like they had these like Fannie Mae loans or something.
00:36:38.180 anyway so i was able to go on this thing but we went to what was something we're just talking 1.00
00:36:43.400 about you remember it uh we were talking about oh going to a stranger's place to suck and fuck 0.98
00:36:50.800 uh you're on a boat you're working you met a girl maybe yeah i was on uh i met a guy no i never met 0.99
00:36:59.960 a man i'm never meeting a man yeah i'm so straight i'm never meeting a man well i would meet a man
00:37:04.520 for like dinner or something if it's a friend or like but i'm not when the sun goes down you gotta
00:37:09.340 go well i'm just like i think being gay probably 1000 years ago or even 100 years ago probably 0.66
00:37:17.900 seemed way more exciting like even if you were just a brave ass dude that loved like carmen 0.62
00:37:22.420 san diego or encyclopedia brown or any of those type of um you know those books like those mystery 0.99
00:37:27.840 books you might be like oh i'll be gay just because it's fucking you want to play hide and 1.00
00:37:31.520 You go seek against the best. 1.00
00:37:32.780 You ever did some gay shit when you were young, 1.00
00:37:34.700 but you didn't know it's gay? 1.00
00:37:36.560 It's just like boys exploring themselves or something? 0.58
00:37:38.820 Did you do anything like that?
00:37:40.220 I wouldn't say I did anything like that.
00:37:43.720 I did something where me and my cousin,
00:37:46.420 we would go to an abandoned,
00:37:48.100 you know like a construction site when it's abandoned,
00:37:50.500 it has that, what's the place where they,
00:37:52.640 like the container where the construction guys,
00:37:54.640 they do coffee, they take a nap.
00:37:56.400 Oh yes.
00:37:57.240 You know the container?
00:37:58.080 Yes, it's like a little trailer.
00:38:00.480 A trailer, yeah, and it was like an abandoned trailer.
00:38:03.800 Me and my cousin would go there and we would give each other massages
00:38:07.380 and the prize was like candy, a piece of candy.
00:38:10.220 Like one minute was one piece of candy and we'd give each other these back massages. 0.96
00:38:16.040 And it was like, and then one time I remember we put our dicks into like a bottle. 0.96
00:38:20.080 We like shared a bottle. 0.89
00:38:21.600 How big of a bottle are we saying?
00:38:23.340 Now, I wish I could say Nesty with a big one.
00:38:26.200 It was a little, it was, you know.
00:38:28.580 Oh, wow.
00:38:29.440 Yeah.
00:38:29.940 So we were like exploring.
00:38:31.320 But how did you put them both into the top of the bottle?
00:38:33.280 No, not the same thing.
00:38:34.100 It's like we-
00:38:34.800 Oh, separate bottles.
00:38:36.060 No, same bottle, but we shared it.
00:38:37.860 Oh, one person, then the other.
00:38:39.020 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:38:39.640 Oh, interesting.
00:38:40.500 Yeah, very interesting.
00:38:41.800 And then one time we were giving each other these back massages.
00:38:44.000 I had my shirt off.
00:38:44.680 I was on the floor and my friend was giving this back massage. 1.00
00:38:47.020 And then we're going to fuck the bottle, you know? 0.99
00:38:48.680 It's like a regular Tuesday. 0.99
00:38:51.060 And like a guy-
00:38:52.200 Oh, yeah.
00:38:52.420 First of all, this is also the Estonia Olympics.
00:38:54.760 And then a security guy or a construction worker.
00:38:58.200 Somebody walked in.
00:38:59.120 you know what he did he just ran out because i get it from his perspective he can't go to his
00:39:03.820 boss and be like i saw these two boys it was me and two boys in the trailer he's getting fired
00:39:08.560 yeah yeah yeah so he just ran off well now that you shared then i'll say something so um yeah there
00:39:15.100 was like a thing where like um i mean i remember a couple things i guess because i never had a
00:39:22.180 father so i guess like right nobody ever taught me about sex or anything so my stepdad tried to
00:39:27.180 talked to me about sex he was literally showing me videos on like a laptop it was like an erotic
00:39:31.180 movie where you don't see penetration but you see it from the shadow i was 17 years old i was like
00:39:35.480 you think that's cool let me i showed him have you seen mr horse my stepdad was like yo
00:39:42.800 this is out there i was like yeah here's dude so yeah my sex talk was so late so it was just me 0.96
00:39:50.440 in the fucking trailer at nine years old trying to figure out oh yeah emotions oh dude i remember 0.96
00:39:56.400 one time yeah like my buddy and i who's over at my birthday party or whatever and he was like you 0.99
00:40:02.160 had your birthday party and then like two friends got to stay overnight right so there was the
00:40:05.740 everybody came to the party and you had to pretend like everybody was leaving but then two friends
00:40:09.780 got to stay overnight for your birthday and one friend was like a little bit older and he was
00:40:15.340 kind of thick this little kind of thick kid and he was like all right let's all take our shirts off
00:40:20.020 And then he said, like, you could read each other's ribs.
00:40:26.080 Like, you know, your ribs, like, they had, like, it was almost like hieroglyphics.
00:40:29.360 Like, if you rub your hand along the other person's ribs, you could get, like, a message out of it. 0.98
00:40:33.580 Almost like, you know those bumps that they do for people that are fucked up? 0.99
00:40:38.220 Yeah. 0.99
00:40:38.880 Braille.
00:40:39.420 Braille.
00:40:39.860 Braille.
00:40:40.560 So he said your body holds Braille in it.
00:40:43.080 And if you put your hands, like, along somebody's ribs, you can, you'll get a message, right?
00:40:49.320 I got a real hard braille for you right now. 0.94
00:40:52.740 You can read this when you're blind, deaf, and mute, dude.
00:40:56.760 I got a good braille for you down here, dude.
00:40:59.780 But no, no.
00:41:01.840 So we had us, bro.
00:41:03.320 So we had us, like, there was, like, three of us under this, like, blanket or something.
00:41:07.700 And we're all just sitting there.
00:41:08.800 We didn't have our shirts on.
00:41:09.500 And we're just, like, all trying to read each other's ribs, dude, you know? 0.78
00:41:13.360 And then, like, whoever seemed like the kind of gayest kid would, like, get a message or something. 0.65
00:41:16.540 or it was just like 0.57
00:41:17.480 but this one kid
00:41:18.460 was kind of facilitating it
00:41:19.660 and he'd probably seen
00:41:20.600 something erotic
00:41:21.440 or he'd had like
00:41:22.200 different thoughts
00:41:23.560 or something
00:41:24.020 because your synapses
00:41:25.500 were firing
00:41:26.160 of pleasure 0.83
00:41:26.920 and reproductive
00:41:27.780 and testosterone
00:41:28.880 but it's a lot of information
00:41:31.280 but you can't translate it
00:41:32.800 right
00:41:33.140 like
00:41:33.860 I remember when I was
00:41:35.680 like seven years
00:41:36.500 or something old
00:41:37.340 it was a Christmas party
00:41:39.660 oh do tell
00:41:40.420 it was a Christmas party
00:41:41.400 fair
00:41:41.780 fair play lad
00:41:42.980 and my
00:41:43.580 and was it snowing out
00:41:45.400 lots of snow
00:41:47.120 so we need to be here
00:41:48.980 tucked in
00:41:50.460 and I remember there was this
00:41:53.340 and there was this
00:41:55.380 cousin, she was like in her 30s
00:41:57.680 maybe, ginormous 1.00
00:41:59.640 titties, I didn't know 0.99
00:42:01.660 that titties 0.98
00:42:04.060 are the secret to life 0.98
00:42:05.160 but I know that something is there
00:42:07.500 you know, it's like there's sexuality
00:42:09.540 is already, it's, you just don't
00:42:11.680 know what to do with information, something about
00:42:13.840 these titties are making me feel in a way and i don't know you don't it's not it's like innocent
00:42:19.220 it's not like i have an ipad to google right it's just this mystery feeling and i would sit in her 0.98
00:42:25.800 lap and i would put my head like my back on my neck between my cousin's titties and i would like 1.00
00:42:31.360 squeeze them and i would feel oh just feel the pressure of two tits against the back of your 0.99
00:42:36.240 head feels amazing that's good and all my cousins are laughing because they know girls know so it's 1.00
00:42:43.780 funny to them right they see this kid just i know this little parrot this little horndog right it's
00:42:48.360 just a horndog you're just it's almost like a an electrical wire on the street that's just rattling
00:42:52.580 and i noticed the more i bring her this she was drinking this red liquid it was wine and the more
00:42:58.380 i would bring the wine the more titty access i could get oh do tell because she got a little 0.93
00:43:03.220 crazier and crazier and they start laughing more and i kept going to the kitchen a little bill
00:43:08.040 little bill cosby jr i was putting the juice and i kept bringing her more wine my dear and you know 0.98
00:43:14.920 what's crazy she gets so fucked up she like takes a nap on the couch okay and i do you want to stop 0.99
00:43:25.460 this story here no no no this gets good and i really want to squeeze the titties but in my 1.00
00:43:32.480 seven-year-old brain something said no right something said no right the titties are closed 0.91
00:43:38.440 and i felt bad about it like that i even thought of it so i went in my room and i felt bad
00:43:43.140 that's how i know i can never write even as a seven-year-old boy there's something in your
00:43:48.860 body that goes this now that she's sleeping this is weird right right if two people are playing
00:43:53.860 the game exactly then we can have the game yeah yeah wow dude yeah let me think oh then it takes 1.00
00:44:00.280 so many you know and after that it takes so many years for even to find out about sex pussy and all 0.99
00:44:05.920 that yeah but it's funny when you're a little pervert boy and you just all these emotions and 0.99
00:44:10.500 all these oh you don't know what to do with them oh yeah well we had this one fellow boss named
00:44:14.620 roy i think his name was or he said it was and he would like he used a hair dryer or whatever so he
00:44:19.880 was kind of he was leaning towards being gay and because children didn't use hair dryers we just
00:44:28.640 didn't even know about it and he knew about it he would always have his with him if you were even 0.98
00:44:32.540 just hanging out with him in a room he'd fucking plug my mom would say he's like a kid who loves 0.88
00:44:35.880 a sunny day yeah but one time he did get i remember he got uh he's like dude if you take a 0.98
00:44:48.100 piece like a piece of tape right and you put one piece on the end the top of your wiener like tape
00:44:53.360 it to the top of your wiener and you put the other piece of the tape on the top of his wiener
00:44:56.920 And I remember him like
00:44:59.460 Getting us to do stuff like that
00:45:02.120 And stuff
00:45:02.640 Or like play Navy or whatever 0.99
00:45:04.660 Like just different shit 0.99
00:45:05.600 That was just in hindsight 0.99
00:45:06.920 In hindsight
00:45:07.660 Because then you're just standing there
00:45:09.140 And now there's like this little bridge
00:45:10.760 You don't realize it's a bridge
00:45:12.020 It's a bridge
00:45:12.940 You don't realize that though
00:45:14.120 It's a bridge
00:45:14.940 Right?
00:45:15.880 Because you think
00:45:16.340 Oh it's just some tape on my wiener
00:45:17.680 Some tape on their wiener
00:45:18.460 It's like a Ouija board
00:45:19.440 Like we're opening up the spirits
00:45:21.540 Yes
00:45:21.880 There's a portal
00:45:22.400 Yeah it's a portal too
00:45:23.960 It's a portal
00:45:24.720 So I think there's stuff like that
00:45:26.380 when kids are young and they don't know um one time i found my buddy's kids i just walked in i was
00:45:32.360 like i'd live with this family they're they're pretty much like family to me i'd walked in and
00:45:36.280 two of the young kids are in the bed naked together yeah but i think it's just kids like
00:45:39.640 they don't know what to do my friend scott would come over and we would like go on a date with our 0.98
00:45:44.520 pillows like in the room or whatever and uh just like shit like that my mom like had boyfriends 0.90
00:45:51.580 i i do think that uh being open to your children about sexuality i don't i think at these times 0.98
00:45:59.380 especially with the internet all this keeping it innocent is actually worse and keep you know
00:46:04.920 some sometimes kids get really traumatized if if the parents make it really traumatic because if 0.63
00:46:10.560 you do something like explore your body or some some of this weird shit and you know your dad 0.95
00:46:14.640 walks in and starts yelling and beating the shit out of everybody that's actually really bad it's 0.98
00:46:19.940 like it's hard to raise like okay like i i have a friend he's uh he's got a beautiful daughter 0.94
00:46:26.400 and uh and i had to babysit for this little girl um she was like maybe six or seven first time in
00:46:33.860 my life i've ever been together with a with a small girl and i got so nervous immediately you
00:46:39.540 know because it's like it's not even my daughter it's my friend's daughter they go they went to
00:46:44.040 the city to do something and i've already hung out with her so right but when you're the oh dude
00:46:48.280 first time I had to watch my niece I was like
00:46:51.200 what the heck? I never thought about that
00:46:53.040 it's actually, I can't leave you alone cause
00:46:55.160 I'll be downstairs watching TV 0.99
00:46:57.280 and you're up there fucking jumping off a balcony 0.99
00:46:59.060 and now I gotta explain to my friend 0.99
00:47:00.460 so I'm nervous
00:47:02.680 and then the mother starts
00:47:05.140 telling me all these things she can't do 1.00
00:47:06.680 no peanuts, literally she's gonna explode into a
00:47:09.320 and then I gotta think about 1.00
00:47:10.660 wait, what has peanuts in them?
00:47:13.040 does a sneakers, oh I got sneakers
00:47:15.020 now I'm starting to
00:47:16.540 right now you're hiding stuff or covering things up taping down a snickers yeah yeah then i'm like
00:47:21.460 oh where's a loose knife i start right baby proofing the place basically you know so and you
00:47:26.300 happen to bring four loose knives which was exactly i had yeah oh i guess i gotta hide the
00:47:30.400 knives i guess we're not doing throwing knives so then she goes no peanuts blah blah blah oh and
00:47:35.880 then she goes no watching uh what's that series that girls like the grassy to grassy the grassy
00:47:42.220 high to grow yeah that show is now on it's you know it's on in estonia well that time it was
00:47:48.500 oh wow and girl bring up the grassy dude is this the original it's original wow bro i forgot about 0.99
00:47:55.380 this and people and little girls love this shit but it's got a lot of like sexual stuff in it 0.99
00:48:00.360 it's a certain age where you're ready for this show got it she was not ready so the mom tells 0.99
00:48:04.640 you know the grassy you know you can watch frozen you know and then she goes no no candy because her
00:48:10.320 sugar because it's like late at night and when we're picking her up we need to put her to bed 0.97
00:48:13.920 if you give her sugar now it's all you're fucking it's us right all these rules and then they go oh 0.91
00:48:20.000 and watch out that she's she likes to climb stuff they noticed that in my uh in my apartment i had a 0.98
00:48:26.700 i had a uh the the staircase that goes up like this you know what it's not circular like a
00:48:31.920 winding staircase winding staircase and it's got the railing like in castlevania or transylvania
00:48:36.800 Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.
00:48:37.760 I'm a vampire. 1.00
00:48:39.740 And they go, oh, don't let her ride the railing.
00:48:42.540 It's like, you know, don't let her climb it.
00:48:45.800 You know, they already see the danger, you know.
00:48:48.060 So they're giving me this, bah, bah, don't do that.
00:48:49.340 No jelly beans. 0.99
00:48:50.280 No fucking da Grazi. 1.00
00:48:51.740 No peanuts. 1.00
00:48:53.240 No, oh, fuck. 1.00
00:48:54.840 Jeez, this is way more than I expected. 1.00
00:48:57.300 And they leave.
00:48:58.000 Takes the fun out of it, too.
00:48:59.100 I know.
00:48:59.560 Part of the fun of watching someone's kid is seeing what happens if you don't know what
00:49:03.780 is going on.
00:49:04.380 And then me and this angel, we're, like, hanging out on the couch.
00:49:08.380 I mean, we're watching Frozen.
00:49:09.540 She's already seen it.
00:49:10.540 I've seen it.
00:49:11.880 And then, like, I want to be the cool uncle.
00:49:17.000 Jellybean city.
00:49:17.720 I get the jellybean. 1.00
00:49:18.440 I fuck it. 1.00
00:49:19.040 Right. 1.00
00:49:19.280 Or you smoke on the porch ladder, watch you through the glass, that kind of shit. 1.00
00:49:22.120 Yeah. 1.00
00:49:23.420 I get jellybeans up in this bitch. 1.00
00:49:25.160 I put the grassy on. 1.00
00:49:26.200 She's jumping up and down.
00:49:27.300 We're watching the grass.
00:49:28.040 She's running around having fun.
00:49:29.620 Let's go.
00:49:31.160 And I'm like, and I tell her, I make her pinky swear. 0.61
00:49:33.760 Don't tell nothing 0.51
00:49:35.500 You don't say nothing
00:49:36.940 And she's like
00:49:37.700 Okay
00:49:38.120 And we run around
00:49:39.420 Jellybean City
00:49:40.360 Degrassi's on
00:49:41.440 Full blast
00:49:42.300 We're listening to 1.00
00:49:43.140 Fucking 0.99
00:49:43.520 What's that 0.99
00:49:44.560 Glorilla
00:49:45.140 We're listening to 1.00
00:49:46.560 Crazy shit 0.99
00:49:47.520 I'm a nigh 1.00
00:49:48.400 Maybe when you got it
00:49:49.520 I don't
00:49:49.860 Yeah 0.95
00:49:50.100 And then she goes
00:49:51.420 Let's ride on the railing
00:49:53.660 And I'm like 1.00
00:49:54.160 Fuck your parents 1.00
00:49:56.220 Yeah 1.00
00:49:56.720 We're taking a ride
00:49:58.740 Yeah
00:49:59.220 So I go first
00:50:00.680 Woo
00:50:01.440 I come down
00:50:03.040 fast she's like oh my god it's my turn my turn i'm like okay she gets up there and i'm at the
00:50:09.020 bottom and because it's i'm trying to see where she can fall off yeah that's called risk management 0.67
00:50:14.580 risk management we got jelly beans we got the grassy we're riding rails oh yeah and she comes
00:50:20.320 down slow but first she looks back at me and the face she has she makes like a 0.70
00:50:30.800 i realize i can see it i don't think so i think so you think so so i catch this little horndog 1.00
00:50:41.980 and she wants to go again she keeps getting slower and slower and you're putting her back up there 0.99
00:50:47.020 you got i mean what are you doing she wants to go again well you're the fucking manager of the 0.98
00:50:52.580 place yeah but it's hard to be like no you know oh yeah you're right so she goes maybe two three 0.98
00:51:02.120 more rides right oh my god bro you gotta chill dude i mean like you're saying i'm i'm not sure
00:51:09.900 if this is what it's about but i do know children are little horn dogs you know well i think there
00:51:15.980 There's a lot of, bring this up, actually.
00:51:18.460 What, like, when does hormones start to affect
00:51:20.860 the way that children act and behave?
00:51:22.820 Oh, dude, I remember when I was a kid now,
00:51:25.060 and yeah, sorry if I made you feel,
00:51:26.320 I shouldn't have been making you feel weird.
00:51:27.420 No, no, no.
00:51:27.860 I wasn't trying to make you feel weird.
00:51:28.680 I think I just got scared.
00:51:29.780 I didn't know where.
00:51:30.180 No, no, no, but you know there's more to the story.
00:51:32.060 Oh, there is?
00:51:32.960 So.
00:51:33.560 Should we have more?
00:51:34.440 We ride, she rides, she rides, we fun, we fun, we fun.
00:51:37.660 Jellybean, jellybean city.
00:51:39.180 They're grassy, they're grassy, they're grassy.
00:51:41.320 So then the parents get back. 1.00
00:51:43.060 This bitch blows it immediately. 1.00
00:51:44.180 She goes, we had jellybeans. 1.00
00:51:45.180 I wrote the line. We watched the grass. See, it was so much fun. And they're, you know, my friend.
00:51:49.460 And then my, oh, my friend stays over. We have a little beer. We haven't seen it in a long time.
00:51:53.800 And the mom takes the kid home. And it's this awkward moment between me and my friend.
00:51:57.920 He goes, because they have a, they have that staircase too. And he looks at me and goes,
00:52:02.880 that staircase, didn't she? I go, yeah. He goes, yeah, that's a mom conversation.
00:52:08.240 But see, then we talked about it. You also, as a parent, you have to be cool about this.
00:52:13.380 yeah you know like you can't we don't have a little girl like that you can't be like 0.84
00:52:18.300 never never touch the flower then it's gonna be then she's gonna be banging prisoners when she's 1.00
00:52:24.880 20 years old because she's like oh daddy said no flower touching yeah i'm open up a florist down 1.00
00:52:29.140 there by the correctional center or whatever it's a florist center it's a fucking forest down here 0.97
00:52:33.000 now god so with kids you know it's always there's a tender point but that's that's totally a mom 0.98
00:52:38.760 to daughter conversation of course but it is interesting how you learn about sex right and
00:52:43.340 what happens to you this says puberty actually starts between age 8 and 13 and girls and 9 and
00:52:49.260 14 and boys if it starts before age 8 and girls before age 9 and boys doctors often consider it
00:52:55.100 early and worth checking out but is it puberty that's starting or is it um because it is i
00:53:02.500 remember probably i maybe i was about seven or eight and uh and i remember like just pressing
00:53:09.260 things against my crotch like even if i just was like pressing these against my crotch felt good
00:53:14.260 so i'd find like even if you were just walking by something and like you ever see a tree that 0.95
00:53:18.400 has like one of those kind of butt like a little butt sticking out i've dated a few
00:53:22.760 yeah so you've been to that forest before is what you're telling us but what i'm saying is this yeah 0.97
00:53:29.740 I remember as a kid, like, sometimes my dad and I would go walk to church, and I would just walk, like, we'd walk by this one tree, and I remember him telling me, at some point, at one age or something, I just would walk over and just press my crotch against it.
00:53:44.660 All I did as a kid was lay on the floor flat and just shove my little wheelie into the floor just to make it stimulate.
00:53:51.420 Then I had a Pink Panther.
00:53:52.840 Remember Detective Pink Panther?
00:53:54.480 Oh, yeah, dude. 1.00
00:53:55.160 I had that as a toy, like a soft toy, and I would just, like, f**k this pink panther so much that even under my, like, foreskin, I had pink hair, so I would f**k this shit out of this f**k. 1.00
00:54:06.740 Oh, God. 1.00
00:54:07.300 Yeah, we would solve some crimes, and then you know what the award is.
00:54:10.520 You solved another crime, panther.
00:54:12.460 Oh, and that exact toy. 0.99
00:54:15.000 See, it's got a little p***y. 0.97
00:54:16.280 It's got everything. 0.99
00:54:16.700 It doesn't have a p***y, Ari. 0.99
00:54:18.000 That's just its body. 0.99
00:54:19.260 Yeah, but your imagination can add.
00:54:21.060 What?
00:54:21.540 It doesn't.
00:54:22.200 No, you cannot. 0.99
00:54:23.080 And I would f**k it so much. 0.98
00:54:24.900 I still have it in my podcast studio in Estonia. 0.97
00:54:27.300 It's like a story that I told in my old podcast in Estonia.
00:54:30.260 And between the crotch, all the hairs are like gone now. 1.00
00:54:32.820 Because I just, because I just, and she was a little whore, wasn't she? 1.00
00:54:35.880 It's a man. 1.00
00:54:36.500 She was a little whore, wasn't she? 1.00
00:54:38.600 I would come home from school, I'd put Metallica on, and just rail my Pink Panther. 1.00
00:54:43.720 Every case got solved that night.
00:54:48.720 What if you listen to that song, Alice in Chains, down and out.
00:54:52.300 Pink Panther is a male.
00:54:53.280 Well, you know, it's.
00:54:54.520 Thank you.
00:54:54.760 Let's say that one more time.
00:54:56.020 You know who else I...
00:54:56.880 Hey, for the people in the back, say it.
00:54:59.400 You got to hear yourself say it.
00:55:01.480 Gender is a spectrum. 0.99
00:55:03.440 Yeah, but let's see what it says here. 1.00
00:55:05.920 Perplexity, help us out.
00:55:07.820 Can you use perplexity?
00:55:09.180 Let's get this real quick.
00:55:10.420 See, see, see, see, see, see.
00:55:11.780 Generally portrayed.
00:55:12.960 Would you mind reading it for us?
00:55:15.400 Non-gendered.
00:55:16.960 The cartoon Pink Panther is generally portrayed as male.
00:55:21.420 How did they put male as bold? 1.00
00:55:23.340 Just to fuck with me. 1.00
00:55:24.760 Like, hey, bro. 1.00
00:55:26.160 They did.
00:55:27.640 Yeah, I was bang.
00:55:28.660 I banged this toy.
00:55:30.140 Bah, bah, bah, bah.
00:55:31.840 It was like, you know.
00:55:32.940 Or were you banging them or do you think you were just rubbing?
00:55:36.560 Right. 0.94
00:55:37.080 But between the legs, I already knew enough.
00:55:40.280 I already knew enough.
00:55:41.400 That's where I got to put it, you know.
00:55:43.420 Yeah. 1.00
00:55:44.000 I had fun with this dirty slut, dude. 1.00
00:55:46.480 That's not a dirty slut. 1.00
00:55:48.000 No, she was my little slut. 1.00
00:55:49.200 Dude, that was Pink Panther or that's Heathcliff or that's, these are good people. 0.99
00:55:53.080 These are Snoopy.
00:55:53.900 These are good people. 1.00
00:55:54.620 And then I'd even fuck this whore when I even got like a little girl, 1.00
00:55:59.480 not like a girlfriend, you know, like you get like a kiss. 1.00
00:56:02.460 So I'd have like breakup sex. 1.00
00:56:04.440 Like once every two weeks, I'd still fuck the shit out of my fucking Pink Panther 1.00
00:56:07.560 and then went back to my little girlfriend next door. 1.00
00:56:09.780 Yeah. 1.00
00:56:10.640 You're running shit, huh? 1.00
00:56:11.880 I'll run that shit. 1.00
00:56:12.720 She was a little slut, dude. 1.00
00:56:14.980 Dear God. 1.00
00:56:16.020 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00
00:56:17.220 No, I just didn't know that kind of stuff was going on in the third world or whatever.
00:56:20.240 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:56:20.900 We take for granted here that animals and like different things like Mattel or these different companies.
00:56:30.020 Bring up some different Mattel animals from like the 80s and 90s if you can.
00:56:33.520 Mattel?
00:56:34.160 This was the company that made a lot of these stuffed animals.
00:56:37.000 And I think we take for granted here in the United States that these animals get treated well, right?
00:56:42.560 They get, you know, people.
00:56:43.960 I treat her real well. 0.98
00:56:45.260 Like popples.
00:56:46.100 Like you ever see popples?
00:56:47.300 Never.
00:56:47.560 Okay, but okay.
00:56:48.820 Well, inspector.
00:56:49.820 I had a potato.
00:56:51.840 Okay, yeah.
00:56:52.440 Some people...
00:56:53.160 We had a long winter communism and a potato.
00:56:57.320 We didn't have poppers.
00:56:57.500 But here's what I'm saying.
00:56:59.060 But I think we take for granted in America that stuffed animals here get...
00:57:03.300 Like, they'll tuck them into bed and they'll, like, treat them well or get them a little glass of water. 1.00
00:57:07.420 I didn't treat this bitch well at all. 1.00
00:57:08.520 Yeah. 1.00
00:57:09.160 This bitch got ran through, dude. 1.00
00:57:11.000 Oh, my God. 1.00
00:57:11.780 She was a dirty little woman. 1.00
00:57:12.900 He was a man. 1.00
00:57:14.080 She was a dirty little woman. 1.00
00:57:15.220 He was a male cat. 1.00
00:57:16.620 No, no, no, no.
00:57:17.820 Dude, he was a male cat with pink skin.
00:57:19.500 he was obviously going through a lot
00:57:21.000 and then
00:57:22.580 and then what
00:57:25.100 like maybe like 10 years ago
00:57:27.140 when I
00:57:27.740 when me and my girlfriend
00:57:29.060 were chilling at my place
00:57:30.560 we did a little role play
00:57:31.980 and she dressed as
00:57:32.840 because she didn't know the story
00:57:34.120 from my old podcast
00:57:35.080 oh and for your birthday
00:57:36.280 or something she did it 1.00
00:57:36.920 yeah she dressed as the Pink Panther 0.99
00:57:38.320 oh that's pretty 0.89
00:57:39.280 and I was the detective
00:57:40.200 Closor
00:57:40.820 Detective Closor
00:57:42.000 I can't remember his name
00:57:42.940 and I was like
00:57:43.860 da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da 1.00
00:57:48.060 You're sucking my cock. 1.00
00:57:52.040 It's great to see you having a good time in our country. 1.00
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01:01:09.200 slash theo that's better h-e-l-p dot com slash theo uh take me into estonia a little bit though
01:01:19.100 like just like well let's talk about this like because we're talking about sex and being young
01:01:22.940 um and so you're you're saying that like what is the conversation really like what is the real
01:01:29.300 conversation you would have with the kid like how do you really do that with a kid do you think
01:01:33.120 because obviously you and i grew up in a way where like we were figuring out ourselves
01:01:36.500 Like for me
01:01:37.500 I realize now
01:01:38.980 Like
01:01:39.200 I don't like talking about
01:01:40.880 A lot of sexual stuff
01:01:41.820 With my friends even
01:01:42.620 Because to me
01:01:43.920 Like sex was always
01:01:44.840 Like a secret thing
01:01:45.680 Like a private thing
01:01:46.420 Yes
01:01:46.700 And it was secret
01:01:47.660 I had to sneak
01:01:48.460 And find the magazines
01:01:49.520 And I had to do it in secret
01:01:50.680 So like
01:01:51.100 So my whole life
01:01:52.280 I've always felt like
01:01:53.180 Like it's
01:01:54.040 Like it's not like
01:01:54.980 But it's like a secretive thing
01:01:56.600 And it's like very like
01:01:57.540 It's super secretive
01:01:58.980 And do you think that's good or no?
01:01:59.920 I don't think that it's good
01:02:01.080 I don't think it's good either
01:02:02.100 Right
01:02:02.260 Like my household 0.99
01:02:03.260 Had a single mother
01:02:04.340 We had a stepdad at one point
01:02:05.840 But my mom had a lot of boyfriends.
01:02:07.960 She would be, you know, in Estonia, we have sauna culture.
01:02:10.660 So everyone's naked.
01:02:12.060 Everyone's naked.
01:02:12.640 Well, you have what culture? 1.00
01:02:13.780 Sauna culture.
01:02:14.780 Sauna.
01:02:15.340 Sauna.
01:02:15.800 Okay, saunas, yeah.
01:02:16.540 Like even as a little kid, I would sit.
01:02:20.160 You know a sauna?
01:02:20.940 It's got the, you know, the steps?
01:02:22.640 Yes.
01:02:23.080 It's hotter up there.
01:02:24.300 So kids would always be sitting in front of the feet of the adults.
01:02:28.680 Got it. 1.00
01:02:29.080 And even my mom's girlfriends would come over and I would be in the sauna with the ladies.
01:02:33.540 I would sit in front and is like so far from my face right like as a kid I would look back
01:02:38.780 I'd laugh at it they would laugh at it very close a casual distance yes and it's like
01:02:43.040 and it's so being naked and sexuality in my family at least this is not the case for all
01:02:49.860 Estonian families but we also don't have any Christian guilt or none of that you know it's
01:02:55.140 like a communistic thing which has Christian values to some extent some homophobia and some
01:03:00.680 chauvinism, all that, you know, that comes with it. But sexually wise, sin is not like included
01:03:07.080 in it, you know? So there's no guilt really feeling sexual things. And in my house, yeah,
01:03:12.200 my mom would have boyfriends. I would hear them have sex and my mom would be like, mommy needs 1.00
01:03:17.100 her own little time. So you go hang out with the sister. I know that that means like, I didn't 1.00
01:03:21.240 know what sex was, but I knew it's like that little grownup thing. Right. So you knew there 0.58
01:03:25.320 was something grownup going on. So it did feel adult, but it didn't feel wrong. And then, you
01:03:30.300 know i would uh have like even when i was like 14 15 i started having little girlfriends over
01:03:34.940 my mom would like literally dude when i was like 15 my mom this girl was like very shy and we were 0.92
01:03:41.600 watching ice age in my room and then my mom would bring us cinnamon rolls and then when she didn't 0.98
01:03:48.220 look my mom would give me like two condoms just in case we didn't even fuck i was like fully virgin 0.90
01:03:54.580 but she wanted you to just feel okay about it she wanted me to feel okay and i think that
01:03:58.920 was very healthy, like looking at other people my age who I've met, and I talk about their
01:04:05.580 childhood, about their sexuality. It seems like sex, exactly like you said, it's a thing in the
01:04:10.920 shadows. And I think when you're a young, like a, especially a young boy, I think it's really
01:04:18.040 bad to hide those things and make you feel bad about having certain emotions that you can't
01:04:22.500 really control. It's just hormones. That's a good point. Yeah. Some of you, that's the thing
01:04:25.600 is that you can't control it so it's like then it makes you feel ashamed a part of you that you
01:04:30.880 have scientifically there is no way you can control and you and then what happens then you're 0.99
01:04:35.920 40 and you're in a dungeon with oh with like a drill in your ass well that's because i gotta 0.99
01:04:42.640 let go because mommy said i'm a bad boy that's what happens is it really i was i mean i guess 1.00
01:04:50.100 i don't know i was a good boy and i'm not gonna have a drill up my ass i'm gonna treat a girl 1.00
01:04:54.540 nice and then we're gonna have sex yeah two adults yeah i think this is very this is definitely a 0.99
01:05:00.840 good time to learn about some of this because um yeah now with porn i mean wow well let me think 0.98
01:05:08.120 about some of this let me think for a second because i like talking about this stuff because
01:05:12.020 it's also important like a lot of people don't have some of these conversations right and they
01:05:15.200 don't think about it and parents don't know because like i think it's interesting your mother would
01:05:19.820 make you the cinnamon roll so here's something it's like you know you're a good boy you get the
01:05:24.160 dessert. And I, you know, I care about you. There's something, a mother making a treat,
01:05:27.820 giving you an offering, but also here is something I want to let you know that I understand what's
01:05:31.140 going on here. And that if there's something that, that I want you to be, um, safe no matter
01:05:36.700 what. So then it's like, that's what a mother always wants for her child is the child to always
01:05:41.260 to be safe. But I think like the presentation of that is pretty interesting. What do you think?
01:05:46.020 Like, what do you really think? Cause you know, there are some native American tribes where an,
01:05:50.360 an uncle or even a father or brother will teach this younger sibling about masturbation. 0.99
01:05:57.540 We'll literally go out with him into the woods and teach him how to jerk off. 1.00
01:06:01.100 It's like my stepdad. 0.98
01:06:01.980 I was already 17 and he's like, he's like saying like, when it gets hard, you know, you can
01:06:07.320 watch videos and play around with it.
01:06:10.020 That's okay. 1.00
01:06:10.640 I'm like, okay, dude, stick a finger up your ass. 1.00
01:06:13.020 I'll show you what's a good time. 1.00
01:06:14.780 It's already too late, you know?
01:06:16.420 Yeah.
01:06:16.620 I'm already. 1.00
01:06:17.200 I got two toothbrushes hitting up my ass, brother. 1.00
01:06:19.500 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
01:06:19.960 we're partying dude click this remote and see how i feel i got a thing up my ass that makes me go 0.99
01:06:26.440 yeah dude click this remote and i'll run a fucking 5 240 brother click this remote 0.98
01:06:33.680 bro that would be a great game show you have seven people somewhere right 0.97
01:06:39.000 in a in like a quiet area right and one of them and you have to be like 40 feet away 1.00
01:06:46.040 One of them has some sort of remote-activated sexual apparatus hidden in their butt. 1.00
01:06:55.200 The holy hole. 1.00
01:06:56.540 Yeah.
01:06:57.260 The butt or whatever, the 11th fingerprint, some people call it, right?
01:07:02.980 But you don't know who it is, and you only get to press it three times.
01:07:06.600 The offshore account, as we call it.
01:07:08.180 Yeah, the offshore account. 1.00
01:07:10.440 Like when you're a Christian, you can't fuck the holy hole, but you can do the offshore account. 1.00
01:07:14.320 Yeah, yeah. 1.00
01:07:14.740 like yeah or yeah yeah yeah the irs don't know about this one yeah we're talking about where
01:07:19.580 well let's just say where people do malaysian banking right that's that's what we'll call it
01:07:23.780 so uh so anyway um but that's the game show you have seven people and you just get to look on
01:07:33.180 their faces or whatever or you can ask them a question and while they're answering you could
01:07:36.720 buzz but if you don't have the right person at the right time then you're gonna get the wrong
01:07:39.920 person answering when you see a lot of people in a pool and you see that one guy pissing it's so
01:07:43.460 clear you know this one yeah yeah that's fine is that okay to pee in a pool in your country is it
01:07:48.480 normal here it's and very is it's very similar every time i'm in water i pee yeah it feels so
01:07:52.780 good yeah it feels holy yeah um yeah i think getting that out early it must be tough for a
01:08:00.900 parent then here's why i think it's tough i bet and i don't know i'm not a parent but i bet it is
01:08:05.280 you just don't want to see your kid grow up that fast 100 nobody likes to see that and it's probably
01:08:10.380 such a special age where your kid isn't like and it is it's a special age for young people too it's
01:08:14.400 like dude that's like the best years probably where you're like you your dad has like a new
01:08:18.380 best friend you guys do cool stuff together you're like he's your hero and then somebody shows him 0.98
01:08:24.440 some cooter or something or draws a picture of some pussy on a piece on you know on the inside 0.96
01:08:30.720 of a big um oyster shell or something and shows it to the boy and then everything everything changes 0.99
01:08:36.060 Everything becomes about that.
01:08:37.300 Yes.
01:08:37.620 Yeah, but...
01:08:38.640 So it must be tough for a dad.
01:08:40.160 Must be tough.
01:08:41.220 Maybe, I'm just thinking of why.
01:08:42.300 But also with boys,
01:08:42.620 and then looking at my friend with his daughter,
01:08:45.000 you know, that's even tougher,
01:08:46.840 because I think...
01:08:47.560 Oh, it's your angel.
01:08:48.640 It's your angel.
01:08:49.720 Because I think with boys, it's more expected.
01:08:52.040 Like, even with my mother,
01:08:54.280 me being sexual, very accepted.
01:08:56.880 My sister was a bit older,
01:08:58.580 and she was very protective of her.
01:09:01.280 You know, mothers always loved their sons.
01:09:03.440 Dads always loved their daughter.
01:09:04.680 It's like a thing.
01:09:05.880 You know, they always say it's like a thing. 0.98
01:09:07.280 Mothers always are very tough on their daughters 1.00
01:09:09.240 because they're a woman 1.00
01:09:10.880 and they know how tough it is to be a woman. 1.00
01:09:12.860 And you got to toughen these bitches up 1.00
01:09:14.860 for the real world. 1.00
01:09:16.000 Oh, you got to, 1.00
01:09:16.620 nobody touches your fucking flower. 1.00
01:09:18.400 Yeah. 1.00
01:09:18.620 You know, but as a boy- 1.00
01:09:20.080 You got to fortify these bitches. 1.00
01:09:21.720 But as a boy, fertilize the ground, you know? 1.00
01:09:24.060 Right.
01:09:24.320 Have fun.
01:09:25.740 So it's like, 0.98
01:09:26.840 so that's another thing with like girls.
01:09:28.580 Like I remember that.
01:09:29.420 I literally remember even my,
01:09:32.380 like me being a little kid
01:09:33.580 and like having girlfriends
01:09:34.960 And my mom would be like, that's cool
01:09:37.540 You know, my boy is cool
01:09:38.720 My boy's having a little girlfriend, he's the hot guy at school
01:09:41.960 He's the funny guy, that's cool
01:09:43.540 But if my sister would date 1.00
01:09:45.480 That's like a, oof, like a girl 0.99
01:09:47.700 Right, yeah, it's a total different energy 1.00
01:09:50.360 It's a total different energy, man 1.00
01:09:52.040 Yeah, I remember they had a gal 1.00
01:09:53.820 Who would like kind of rub Kleenexes on her 1.00
01:09:55.800 Like in her underpants or whatever 1.00
01:09:56.960 And then throw them off the balcony and let us grab them and catch them 0.99
01:09:59.660 And stuff
01:10:00.060 Almost like catching the bouquet at a wedding or something
01:10:02.300 Wow, the Kleenex with the juices
01:10:05.140 It wasn't juices, but it was like it had enough of an ambiance where you want...
01:10:09.360 Like, I remember putting on cleats one time to catch it, you know?
01:10:11.960 Really?
01:10:12.520 So, yeah, like activated sneakers kind of.
01:10:15.240 I don't know if you guys have cleats in your country or not.
01:10:17.240 One time I had a...
01:10:18.500 We do have cleats.
01:10:20.520 One time, when I was a little boy, there was a girl that stayed over.
01:10:27.000 She was like, my mother's friend, old classmate's daughter, maybe?
01:10:34.800 She was like maybe 19.
01:10:36.580 I was like 11 or 12 or something like that.
01:10:40.080 She stayed over one night.
01:10:42.760 And the next day, I'm alone at home.
01:10:44.620 And you know when you're alone as a boy at home,
01:10:46.280 that's when the devil comes to visit, you know? 0.99
01:10:48.800 Your crotch suddenly like shows up on the wall 0.98
01:10:51.460 like a genie coming out of a lamp. 0.99
01:10:52.940 Like, what are we going to do today, my boy? 0.99
01:10:55.280 Everything in my house needs to get fucked. 0.99
01:10:57.200 Yeah. 1.00
01:10:57.620 What'd you say? 1.00
01:10:58.240 Everything in my house needs to get fucked. 1.00
01:10:59.940 Like I tried my cock everywhere. 1.00
01:11:01.320 The couches, the pillows. 0.99
01:11:03.600 So then I go up there.
01:11:04.640 and this 19 year old
01:11:06.540 I think it's like the pheromones
01:11:08.400 and her cologne were on the bed 0.92
01:11:10.800 she had cologne on? 1.00
01:11:12.820 she sounds
01:11:13.540 19, I mean I think so
01:11:15.020 I think it was cologne
01:11:15.980 not cologne, perfume
01:11:19.820 perfume, sorry
01:11:21.960 a smell, a really nice
01:11:24.780 pleasant smell
01:11:25.380 I go into the bed
01:11:28.180 I put the covers on
01:11:29.560 I take the pillow she slept on
01:11:31.220 I'm like forcing it on my face 0.99
01:11:32.880 I'm like jacking off 0.96
01:11:34.120 Dude I remember
01:11:38.600 This is
01:11:39.080 I don't even know
01:11:40.020 What we're talking about anymore
01:11:40.720 This was supposed to be
01:11:42.360 An interview about it
01:11:43.140 Being from Estonia
01:11:44.200 But here we go dude
01:11:46.140 But dude I remember
01:11:48.400 I would hide in my buddy's
01:11:49.700 At their house
01:11:50.600 I would hide
01:11:51.080 Like
01:11:51.360 His mother was like
01:11:52.680 This sweet 0.50
01:11:53.220 She was like
01:11:53.680 Just like a good 1.00
01:11:54.240 Or she just like 0.50
01:11:55.220 I don't know 1.00
01:11:55.600 But she was attractive too 1.00
01:11:56.760 And like
01:11:57.060 There was like
01:11:57.420 You know there's that energy
01:11:58.440 Where you're attracted
01:11:59.020 To your buddy 1.00
01:11:59.440 One of your buddy's mom
01:12:00.580 Or something
01:12:00.920 You keep going over
01:12:01.640 To his house
01:12:02.200 And you don't even like
01:12:02.820 you'll sleep i don't even like the game you're playing yeah yeah dude yeah and i would i would
01:12:07.480 instead of sleeping in the room with him like we would build like a foursome i would go sleep like 0.98
01:12:11.560 in the hall by her like by their door and shit like just weird shit weird shit but still legal 0.82
01:12:16.760 stuff yeah yeah yeah but i remember i'd get in the clothes hamper and just like she had like one of 0.96
01:12:20.820 her bras was in there oh and i don't know if it was still warm but i thought it was it was and i 0.97
01:12:25.680 would just smell it like put it close to my fucking like i just wanted to push it all the way into my 0.99
01:12:31.020 nose forever that's what i did with the pillow i just wanted to fucking shove it down my dna 0.99
01:12:35.300 yeah yeah i know yeah i wrote i wrote a love letter to my friend's mother by the way no way bro 0.98
01:12:42.160 you need to i got out of hand you got it yeah you got really bad and somebody should be watching
01:12:47.440 you yes still to this day that's a lot dude did you give it to her yes no and she never addressed
01:12:54.160 it oh it's so weird but it wasn't anything it's called unrequited love bring up unrequited love
01:13:00.820 It wasn't everything.
01:13:01.800 I've read about this before.
01:13:03.060 Hold on.
01:13:03.800 What is unrequited?
01:13:05.440 That's what I'm saying.
01:13:06.220 I want to help you get to the,
01:13:07.220 just not to the solution.
01:13:08.680 Like I have no.
01:13:09.420 Unrequited love is one-sided romantic attraction
01:13:12.200 where feelings are not reciprocated,
01:13:14.460 often causing profound emotional distress,
01:13:16.580 including loneliness, low self-esteem, and anxiety.
01:13:20.280 It commonly stems from idealized fantasies,
01:13:22.780 unreturned crushes, or unbalanced relationships
01:13:24.980 with roughly 98% of people experiencing it.
01:13:27.880 Wow.
01:13:28.560 So you're not alone.
01:13:29.380 You're not alone.
01:13:30.300 I'm not alone, dude.
01:13:31.480 Well, how often does unrequited love lead to crime?
01:13:34.180 Can you look that up?
01:13:34.860 And then what were you going to say?
01:13:36.180 That's what I was also thinking.
01:13:38.100 Unrequited love is a very common.
01:13:39.720 Stalking, violence, and murder.
01:13:40.680 Awesome.
01:13:41.640 There you go.
01:13:42.320 Yep.
01:13:42.880 There you go.
01:13:43.280 Right there.
01:13:43.780 The actions can be severe, including stalking, violence, and murder.
01:13:47.000 But I was a little boy, so she was stronger than me.
01:13:49.180 But also three options. 0.89
01:13:50.400 Stalking, violence, and murder.
01:13:51.340 It's not like it's just like include murder.
01:13:53.580 Mm-hmm.
01:13:55.360 Because stalking, it's wrong.
01:13:59.920 but it's well even the mother i wrote that letter to when i was when i was going walking
01:14:09.420 when i was going home from school yeah i would take a longer route just to go by her house
01:14:15.420 oh yeah and maybe catch a titty i never did but i gave the universe a chance to give me a sign
01:14:20.000 just to see something just to see something because that's that's also like i mean we had 0.95
01:14:24.740 porn but this was you gotta like download a fucking image and it was hard it was like right 0.97
01:14:29.100 there to pray for it yeah so to see a titty i need a intervention by god right yeah oh man then i 0.99
01:14:36.980 found a magazine you ever find like a magazine in the woods you know the classic when there's
01:14:40.920 porn in the woods or something yes it was during winter who hid it there do you think they always
01:14:45.780 hide i don't get it at all because somebody had porn in every woods i think everywhere it could
01:14:50.660 have been israel i think if somebody hid it in every woods it's israel it's like the paging
01:14:54.960 pagers. It's like the pagers. You corrupt young men. You corrupt the future army are about to
01:15:01.020 fight by showing them a huge horse cock going into a pregnant lady. Because they all jerk off 1.00
01:15:05.780 and then the army's weaker. It's not a bad strategy. Well, you know, that's what happened 0.99
01:15:09.640 with Ukraine and Russia because Russia deployed a lot of North Korean soldiers. And now they're
01:15:16.320 first time having internet access. You know, they're like not fighting. All they're doing
01:15:20.360 is drinking and jacking off.
01:15:21.780 Nuh-uh.
01:15:22.300 Yeah, because it's like,
01:15:23.180 imagine you're seeing porn 0.70
01:15:24.800 for the first time. 1.00
01:15:25.780 I can jack off by myself.
01:15:27.620 Wow.
01:15:29.900 Let's bring that up.
01:15:31.480 What are you saying? 1.00
01:15:31.980 Koreans are jacking off? 1.00
01:15:33.240 Yeah, North Koreans 1.00
01:15:33.960 because they had no internet. 1.00
01:15:35.060 Now they're deployed.
01:15:35.860 It's like a huge thing.
01:15:37.820 I mean, it's Pandora's box.
01:15:39.840 And then I found this magazine
01:15:41.060 and one time I found,
01:15:42.160 it was during wintertime,
01:15:43.100 it was under ice
01:15:44.000 because it was so frozen.
01:15:45.840 It's almost like ice fishing.
01:15:46.720 You ever been ice fishing?
01:15:47.460 Yeah.
01:15:48.500 And then I had to get a pick
01:15:49.860 and it took me hours with my hands freezing
01:15:53.420 to access these titties.
01:15:55.180 Oh, it's like the new Frankenstein with Jacob Elordi. 0.90
01:15:56.960 Have you seen the beginning of that?
01:15:58.780 Exactly.
01:15:59.640 So clung, clung, I get a big block of ice
01:16:01.920 under the magazine out.
01:16:03.160 I put it in towels near my, what's that on the wall?
01:16:08.700 Radiator.
01:16:09.300 Radiator, near the radiator.
01:16:10.320 It took me like days for it to dry off.
01:16:12.440 Water was everywhere.
01:16:13.620 And then it dried off and I had to peel. 0.98
01:16:15.220 I got only one page open because it was all fucked up. 0.95
01:16:17.600 But it took me like, I was like a detective. 0.95
01:16:19.180 it took me like days to see 0.99
01:16:20.640 and it was all fucked up 1.00
01:16:22.280 except these two big round titties 1.00
01:16:24.200 so I cut the titties out 0.99
01:16:25.420 and kept them in my fucking Batman wallet for years 1.00
01:16:27.820 and I would show other guys at school 0.99
01:16:30.200 I'd be like check out this 0.97
01:16:31.220 and I'd show these two ominous titties 1.00
01:16:33.740 I love that 1.00
01:16:35.180 like wolves eyes 0.67
01:16:36.580 and the first porn video I ever saw 1.00
01:16:40.020 it was gay porn 0.99
01:16:41.060 I just didn't know 0.99
01:16:41.860 it was like so low pixels 0.99
01:16:43.900 I just saw cock going into an orifice 0.99
01:16:46.160 and then it took me like minutes 1.00
01:16:49.100 to realize there's another cock hanging 0.99
01:16:51.280 near the orifice. 0.99
01:16:53.020 It broke my heart.
01:16:54.140 And the guy who was banging, 0.98
01:16:55.240 doing that porn, 0.99
01:16:56.240 he's an Estonian guy. 0.92
01:16:57.160 I met him like 20 years later.
01:16:58.840 No way.
01:16:59.280 Did you tell him it hurt your feelings?
01:17:00.600 Yeah, I told,
01:17:01.220 I really, I said, 1.00
01:17:02.500 I thought you were banging a chick.
01:17:04.200 And he goes,
01:17:04.740 this is my friend, Marcus.
01:17:06.040 Oh. 1.00
01:17:06.660 I was like, fuck. 1.00
01:17:07.140 They're friends, huh? 1.00
01:17:07.980 Yeah.
01:17:08.380 Yeah, you wonder if people are friends
01:17:09.680 in some of those videos sometimes. 0.99
01:17:10.660 See, the whole fucking. 1.00
01:17:12.140 North Korean soldiers hooked on porn 1.00
01:17:14.000 after getting internet access
01:17:15.200 for first time
01:17:15.880 while helping Russia fight Ukraine.
01:17:17.040 Um, North Korean military men who joined the war front in Ukraine on behalf of Russia have, why would, first of all, look up this up separately.
01:17:27.760 Keep me on this page.
01:17:29.160 Why would, uh, why would North Korean men be supporting the Russian side in this war?
01:17:34.880 I just.
01:17:35.260 Communism.
01:17:36.280 Because they're also communistic, you know.
01:17:37.620 Oh, so they're supporting.
01:17:38.500 And they have common interests.
01:17:39.180 Got it.
01:17:39.320 Everyone's against North Korea except, so Russia's seeking for partners, you know. 0.84
01:17:44.240 Got it.
01:17:44.720 um north korean military men who joined the war front in ukraine on behalf of russia have
01:17:48.440 unfettered internet access for the first time and may be using it to watch tons of pornography
01:17:53.460 that's the kind of sentence this one i don't trust the media and may be using it might be
01:17:58.460 to watch tons of pornography you know i'm saying like yeah play what give me one side of the net
01:18:04.060 right yeah according to a report that a pentagon official was unable to confirm so yeah okay i'm
01:18:10.220 So I'm not saying that it's not true, but just the way they shape, if you look at the
01:18:14.500 way they shape articles and stuff, according to a report that a Pentagon official was unable
01:18:20.280 to confirm, warriors from the hermit kingdom engaged in a battle in Ukraine for the first
01:18:24.120 time Monday, but they purportedly started fighting different demons before stepping
01:18:27.660 foot onto any field, according to a report.
01:18:30.560 Does it say what their favorite searches were?
01:18:31.840 I do love, there's a joke up there.
01:18:33.180 They go, hardened soldiers indeed.
01:18:35.320 a usually reliable source tells me the north korean soldiers who have deployed to russia 0.69
01:18:41.520 have never had unfettered access to the internet before as a result they're gorging on pornography
01:18:46.280 someone's telling you to hold the front line but you're seeing everything you've ever dreamed of
01:18:52.580 for the first time i'm staying at the base brother i mean we can give up a little land
01:18:58.520 we can give up a little
01:19:01.340 if we give up a couple
01:19:03.300 hundred more acres
01:19:04.320 so just so I can get through a couple more of these
01:19:07.340 categories that I'm really
01:19:09.420 curious about
01:19:10.240 when I did the youth
01:19:13.500 exchange program in Romania when I was
01:19:15.560 a kid
01:19:15.960 hold on a second
01:19:17.600 I just don't know how many stories I can take
01:19:21.640 where somebody
01:19:23.380 ends up jacking off
01:19:25.600 all over at the end of it 0.84
01:19:27.040 Just you wait.
01:19:27.920 I'm not judging you. 0.98
01:19:29.280 I just have to fucking brace myself for just a second, dude. 1.00
01:19:31.920 Let me touch my fucking neck for a second. 1.00
01:19:33.700 Release the cranium. 1.00
01:19:37.260 Imagine you start doing that on a plane, dude.
01:19:40.000 Hold on a second.
01:19:40.900 I got to release my cranium. 1.00
01:19:42.580 You put a fucking balloon up your nose, dude. 1.00
01:19:44.480 People are getting weird out there, dude. 1.00
01:19:46.400 You know when someone's like stretching at the airport?
01:19:48.220 It's like too much.
01:19:48.880 You know when they're on the ground and they're doing their little things?
01:19:51.060 Oh, yeah. 0.85
01:19:51.640 Just take your bad hip. 0.99
01:19:53.480 Just be a man. 0.98
01:19:55.180 I'm uncomfortable. 0.82
01:19:55.860 dude I want to do squats too but I'm not gonna 0.98
01:19:58.340 just get your fucking bad ankle 0.99
01:20:00.320 to Minneapolis brother 1.00
01:20:01.360 but here's a dream I had
01:20:03.800 is one day if I had a long
01:20:06.440 enough layover
01:20:06.960 I wanted to go for a jog like in the Atlanta airport
01:20:10.460 or the Madrid airport
01:20:12.020 I think is really really big
01:20:14.020 and you want to go jog
01:20:16.160 cause you could jog cause in the Madrid
01:20:18.440 airport it's like
01:20:19.560 you could do like a two mile run in it
01:20:22.280 so I just wanted to go for like a run
01:20:24.220 Like, say if you had a long enough layover, you're trying to kill time, but you also want
01:20:26.380 to get some exercise because you can, like, if you're running late for your plane, you're
01:20:29.820 well, you're welcome to do that all day.
01:20:31.600 For sure.
01:20:32.020 So I'm like, if you just had your headphones on and you just popped on some shorts, why
01:20:37.880 not go for a run?
01:20:39.260 Yeah.
01:20:39.640 That's always been a dream of mine ever since I was young.
01:20:42.380 To run in an airport.
01:20:43.540 To run, but to go for a run in an airport.
01:20:45.780 I think it's to do something someplace that seems obtuse, you know?
01:20:50.620 But let's, I just want to make sure that we get to the end of this thought of like,
01:20:53.860 so did we did we cover fully so as a mother i think or as any parent it's just to create a
01:21:00.160 comfortable way to have that conversation and keep it ongoing so that it can be there's room
01:21:04.760 for it to breathe like yeah i think if it's taboo or if you don't talk about it at all
01:21:09.240 then it feels like um something's wrong exactly scary or then you just learn this is another
01:21:16.480 thing i just realized your friends tell you and it's always some evil older brother that's like 0.98
01:21:20.900 calling you a f**k or whatever and just are doing this in front of you like this and you know um 0.98
01:21:27.040 it's like too much it's gross and that kid probably learned from some dark dark way right yeah so i 0.99
01:21:32.260 think like um like yeah but then here's what happens is you learn from a kid you learn from
01:21:37.980 some like and then and then you you become like oh i need to do certain things or i need to operate
01:21:45.300 certain ways or make sure that i'm like trying to like engage with sex or something so that other
01:21:50.660 people my peers will think it's cool right well the only reason i wanted to lose my virginity
01:21:55.400 was because all my friends had lost their virginity yeah it's not even remember remember
01:21:59.880 how much you wanted to have sex like in your dna you feel it but then when the opportunity how
01:22:05.840 scared i was literally i was so terrified it's crazy and also my girlfriend when we decided to
01:22:12.800 do it i had already lied that i've done it so i had to pretend like i've been here before and
01:22:17.460 And what'd you do to pretend?
01:22:18.620 Just stand up straighter or whatever?
01:22:20.220 Well, I didn't even know, you know, like, 1.00
01:22:22.840 she has angles. 1.00
01:22:25.260 To even get my cock into her sweet little angel hole, 1.00
01:22:29.460 it took me several tries. 1.00
01:22:32.380 I had to try several times.
01:22:34.560 And of course-
01:22:35.600 Yeah, it's like trying keys on a door.
01:22:37.000 You're like, oh, that one's not it.
01:22:38.300 Or that one, yeah, that one goes to that other place.
01:22:39.980 They never explained that in porn, you know.
01:22:41.880 They don't, you know, you don't know that.
01:22:43.700 Yeah.
01:22:44.280 And it took so long.
01:22:45.160 Yeah, I had to like, and I came within like,
01:22:46.860 Maybe it was like two seconds or something, and then you just got to lie.
01:22:51.240 I told her, like, ah, it's my, like, third time, so, you know, I'm still pretty new.
01:22:56.060 Oh, dude, I lost my virginity behind a bowling alley in our town.
01:22:59.200 Really?
01:22:59.620 That they're refurbishing now, so I'm glad that they're doing that.
01:23:03.700 Wait, but in what room?
01:23:04.940 The toilet?
01:23:06.060 No, no, no, behind it, outside.
01:23:07.720 What?
01:23:08.120 Yeah, in the woods.
01:23:09.520 What? 0.95
01:23:10.140 Yeah, no, it was sex, but it was, yeah, I lost my virginity behind his bowling alley. 0.98
01:23:14.080 Bring it up over there. 1.00
01:23:15.020 Tiffany Lane's over there.
01:23:16.860 Oh, you've talked about this.
01:23:19.960 Theo dusted off his little wand and got his weasel grease for the first time here.
01:23:24.600 That means these lanes are well on and the ambience are well done.
01:23:27.080 Pretty cool, huh?
01:23:27.800 Oh, here it is right there.
01:23:28.480 I hate to see that it's closed.
01:23:29.340 Good place if you came early like Theo.
01:23:31.740 I know his girl didn't like that he came so early, but that just makes him an alpha.
01:23:35.820 Let's go. 0.83
01:23:36.380 Let's go.
01:23:37.180 Thank you, Nicholas F.
01:23:39.780 Wow, it's all Theo.
01:23:41.140 It's all Theo, dude.
01:23:42.780 What?
01:23:43.220 I had no idea, dude.
01:23:44.460 Dude, you took this business down probably. 1.00
01:23:46.040 Now there's all these little kids trying to get their dick wet, 1.00
01:23:48.900 and they're not even interested in the lanes. 0.99
01:23:50.700 This bowling alley owner must be so...
01:23:52.880 His mind must be like, 0.99
01:23:54.120 what the fuck's been happening in the last four years? 0.99
01:23:55.660 He's like, why is everybody behind the building? 0.96
01:23:59.080 Nobody wants to use the lanes anymore.
01:24:01.360 Places full of rich history.
01:24:02.480 Theo Von became a man behind this alley.
01:24:04.240 Shout out to the patrons for giving him the strength to do so.
01:24:06.360 Amen to that.
01:24:07.860 I'm here because of Theo Von who lost something precious
01:24:09.660 at this bowling alley so long ago.
01:24:11.380 Any good place for Theo is good enough for me.
01:24:13.040 Oh, that's nice of you.
01:24:13.800 Thank you, my man Wheezy.
01:24:16.040 Again, Theo.
01:24:16.800 It's all Theo.
01:24:17.500 It's literally all Theo.
01:24:18.200 I didn't know.
01:24:18.720 Sorry.
01:24:19.200 Yeah.
01:24:19.460 But anyway, thank you guys for some of the warm sentiment.
01:24:22.220 And yeah, just a beautiful place.
01:24:23.980 And they are reopening it soon.
01:24:25.440 So I am excited about that.
01:24:27.180 You should go to the reopening.
01:24:29.280 Go to the ribbon cutting.
01:24:30.520 You should go to the reopening.
01:24:34.580 Dude, are we even going to mess this place up by even talking about this on here? 0.99
01:24:37.620 No, they're totally fucked now. 0.96
01:24:39.720 But it closed there. 0.99
01:24:40.780 When did it close?
01:24:41.720 Oh, but they're going to see $2 million renovation.
01:24:44.020 Getting a new bowling alley.
01:24:46.040 you know what i should have reopened it yeah there's the spot dang yeah but still i hope
01:24:54.720 that people practice uh you know i'm saying bumper bowling if they do around there um
01:25:00.820 just safe activity but what would you if you're a dad what do you think you say to your son like
01:25:04.780 really like what do you really say to your son if you think you like and when do you think you
01:25:08.700 would do it like i'm trying to think if i'd had a dad around that was going to communicate like that
01:25:12.160 what would i have what would i have liked to like it's probably like around 11 or 12 yeah you see
01:25:19.520 well you see it way before that probably you know the little willy like did you show your little 0.99
01:25:25.500 cock everywhere when you were a kid no did you show it i showed it to everybody i had to really 0.98
01:25:30.420 it felt so good and people would laugh and feel good like my mom would have her girlfriends over
01:25:34.860 they would drink wine and i would do this thing where i would slide like you know they're like in
01:25:39.700 on the couches in the living room and i would slide on my socks and i had a little these like
01:25:45.140 gray sweatpants with a little hole in front i put my little willy oh wow i played the guitar like
01:25:49.320 this and then run back in my room i mean dying laughing they were like right then i did it so
01:25:54.220 much that eventually my mom was like you know that's not right you're like you're 30 now you
01:25:57.840 gotta yeah you're still sliding out there so i would do stuff like that like i would love that
01:26:03.220 that's like funny oh yeah i think it's definitely funny this uh perplexity says the best approach
01:26:08.740 to make it ongoing calm conversation not one big talk yeah yeah that's i guess that's true oh dude
01:26:15.180 i remember i've talked about this before but my uncle was like my uncle i don't know if he was
01:26:21.880 our uncle but he was like a guy that somebody was making love to that had a car right and so
01:26:27.500 he would bring us to the wine stop the wine store and he left me in there one time he was going to 0.92
01:26:32.960 do something so i'm wandering around in there and some lady walks up she's like have you seen my
01:26:36.580 kitty and i didn't know what she was talking about and i was probably i think i was maybe 12 0.99
01:26:40.700 and she opens her jacket she was naked no yeah wait why would she be an angel like that i don't
01:26:48.160 know why but i didn't know what was going on i just remember being like very fully naked bush
01:26:52.560 and fully naked i don't know if it was bush or whatever i mean everything was zen i remember
01:26:56.600 that dude but it was just kind of crazy you know must be for real now i can feel it was nice dude
01:27:04.940 but I just
01:27:05.520 it was like
01:27:06.000 I remember that that happened
01:27:07.520 but I think my uncle
01:27:08.880 had said something
01:27:09.560 after that
01:27:10.060 he maybe
01:27:10.420 he asked me a couple
01:27:11.820 questions about it
01:27:12.620 but I think it's just like
01:27:13.640 did he make her do it
01:27:14.940 maybe
01:27:15.260 no he did not
01:27:16.320 oh that would have been crazy
01:27:17.300 no he didn't have any game
01:27:18.560 I had my girlfriend 1.00
01:27:18.900 show her tits to 1.00
01:27:20.080 like a young kid one time 1.00
01:27:21.480 oh wow
01:27:22.080 just cause 1.00
01:27:22.640 to blow his fucking mind 1.00
01:27:24.100 fuck yeah 1.00
01:27:24.640 that's fucking kind of 1.00
01:27:25.520 fucked up but it's cool 1.00
01:27:26.700 big ass titties 1.00
01:27:27.640 and this kid was like 1.00
01:27:29.480 those fucking yams 1.00
01:27:30.940 huh 1.00
01:27:31.240 yeah
01:27:31.480 dude I'll tell you this
01:27:32.840 one time at
01:27:33.540 at YMCA summer camp, shout out YMCA, best summer camps in the world, I'll say that, facts.
01:27:39.760 They had, we would go to this park called Fountain Blow State Park, and it was in Louisiana.
01:27:44.160 Bring it up over there, Fountain Blow.
01:27:45.760 Let me guess, the reviews are all feel.
01:27:47.840 No, nobody knows about this, dude.
01:27:50.200 Nobody knows about this.
01:27:51.760 But it was like raining one day, and we sat there, and they had this guy named Eddie,
01:27:55.300 and he was pretty cool.
01:27:57.020 Fountain Blow.
01:27:57.900 Just look at the pictures of it.
01:27:58.780 Yep, that's it.
01:27:59.560 It's very pretty.
01:28:00.480 It's very pretty.
01:28:01.380 Very beautiful place.
01:28:02.180 but um like everybody's bored because it was raining and so you got to walk up and look down
01:28:07.820 like his girlfriend's shirt one time one time that's all you need and i just remember i walked
01:28:13.280 up and looked and then i was like oh i didn't get to see it i said that like i just made it up or
01:28:18.580 whatever let me go one more time they disrespected that that you know but i don't know if it was so
01:28:25.480 powerful that i actually couldn't see it like a blank right like it just you staring into something
01:28:30.580 I do want to learn a little bit about what brought you here from Estonia to the USA.
01:28:38.380 Why did you come?
01:28:39.420 Well, stand-up, of course.
01:28:40.740 Okay, so you were doing stand-up there.
01:28:42.100 I was doing it in Estonia.
01:28:43.520 Where?
01:28:44.740 Estonia in the capital, Tallinn.
01:28:46.320 I did it in Australia, Melbourne.
01:28:47.820 I did it in Bangkok for a year.
01:28:49.380 I was the feature on the road in Asia with a lot of guys.
01:28:51.980 I met Ari Shafir that way.
01:28:54.500 I met Sam Tallent in Estonia because he came through.
01:28:58.000 I did it in Canada, Vancouver.
01:28:59.240 He came through Estonia?
01:29:00.120 Yeah, I invited him, yeah.
01:29:01.540 I put some gigs up for him.
01:29:03.000 It was awesome.
01:29:03.800 So were you running your own show there?
01:29:05.740 Yeah, yeah.
01:29:06.120 We have like our own comedy club.
01:29:08.060 Okay.
01:29:08.400 Me and my friends, like eight of us basically own.
01:29:11.540 And it's still active?
01:29:12.760 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:29:13.500 Nice.
01:29:13.660 Absolutely.
01:29:14.160 Summer tour, they're all killing it.
01:29:15.700 How big is Talon?
01:29:17.460 600,000, I think.
01:29:18.740 That's big.
01:29:19.300 Yeah, it's pretty big.
01:29:20.280 How big is Estonia?
01:29:21.460 1.4.
01:29:22.700 But, you know, when you say 1.4 population, what is it really?
01:29:26.620 like actually online voting people
01:29:28.980 who know what's happening in the world,
01:29:31.080 maybe 60,000.
01:29:32.100 60,000.
01:29:32.840 You know, it's like when you say,
01:29:33.660 how much is in America?
01:29:35.120 It's like a big number, right?
01:29:36.300 Right.
01:29:36.880 Yeah, but how much of those people
01:29:38.300 are actually consumers
01:29:39.920 and they go to shows,
01:29:41.820 they go to like online people?
01:29:44.220 I see what you're saying.
01:29:44.940 Right, like America,
01:29:45.700 I think the population now,
01:29:46.520 what is the population now?
01:29:47.500 I bet it's about 350 million.
01:29:49.880 That's crazy.
01:29:50.840 Wow.
01:29:51.600 The US population is approximately 342 to 349 million.
01:29:54.620 but yeah
01:29:56.200 what percent are like
01:29:56.960 so out of those
01:29:58.080 350 million
01:29:59.320 I reckon
01:29:59.800 actual people
01:30:00.980 it's maybe
01:30:02.080 3 million
01:30:02.600 right
01:30:04.260 right
01:30:05.240 a lot of bots
01:30:05.980 a lot of
01:30:06.920 a lot of bots
01:30:07.620 a lot of NPCs
01:30:08.460 I think that could be right
01:30:09.360 did you
01:30:10.680 the people there
01:30:12.600 do the
01:30:12.980 is comedy different there
01:30:14.420 would they get our comedy
01:30:15.580 what is humor like there
01:30:17.800 well
01:30:18.580 you see
01:30:19.400 that's why stand-up
01:30:20.660 had such an explosion
01:30:21.780 as well
01:30:22.340 is that
01:30:22.840 the Soviet Union
01:30:24.080 collapse in 1991. That's when Estonia became a country. Again, we were a country in the 40s
01:30:30.000 before Soviet Union rocked around. And we were Soviet Union basically all the time. 0.87
01:30:35.360 You know, Estonians get really offended when you call us Russian, you know, because we're like
01:30:38.980 Estonian. But it's a very they, them behavior. You know, it's like you were Mike last week,
01:30:43.920 you know, it's like most of our history, we've been Russia. So I don't get offended when people
01:30:47.480 say that, but it's a thing we have. So there's a lot of pride in Estonia right now for being
01:30:51.860 We have our own language, everything, you know.
01:30:53.660 Wow.
01:30:54.220 It's a beautiful place.
01:30:55.840 It is.
01:30:57.240 You would, because you seem like a guy, America's very loud.
01:31:01.480 It's loud.
01:31:02.520 It's a lot.
01:31:03.080 The highways are loud.
01:31:04.380 There's a lot of pollution.
01:31:05.700 It's loud.
01:31:06.260 It's a lot.
01:31:06.840 I agree.
01:31:07.480 That's why you guys are also like culturally like the leaders, because there's a lot of
01:31:12.460 tension and a lot of push and pull.
01:31:14.820 A lot of push and pull creates beautiful art.
01:31:17.280 A lot of tension creates beautiful art.
01:31:19.840 So that's why you guys do that.
01:31:20.960 But Estonia, very serene, calm, sauna, the sea, the ocean, quiet, space, space.
01:31:27.060 We love space.
01:31:27.960 We love quiet.
01:31:28.820 It's not a lot of people.
01:31:30.760 So when the Soviet Union collapses, with like rap, music, culture, movies, stand-up comedy,
01:31:38.800 the more, you know, to control what communism does really well when it works is to control people.
01:31:48.580 you control their subconscious their mind so that's why there was all this you can't speak
01:31:56.480 bad about the government there's all this censorship right you can't say bad words no
01:32:01.160 sexual stuff you have to keep people subconscious subdued to control them just like they're doing
01:32:07.180 now in north korea that's what you have to do well just like even that's happening now here i think
01:32:12.620 in america is like you know they're like the way that they sedate us with certain like um things
01:32:17.100 you can and can't say online that sort of thing no that's what you do but the more tension creates
01:32:24.400 the bigger the release when you get to say it like that's how stand-up started in america so much
01:32:30.660 tension with the government racial tensions everything and then a guy named lenny bruce 0.98
01:32:35.080 starts riffing with a cigarette in his mouth and starts saying crazy shit and people go into this 0.99
01:32:40.100 room like holy fuck this is where you can talk off the record this is how i talk with my friends 1.00
01:32:46.480 when the government isn't listening, you know? 0.99
01:32:48.240 That's why communism, so that's how it, you know, like-
01:32:51.300 That's how whispering started, even.
01:32:52.500 Exactly.
01:32:53.420 And literature back in the day,
01:32:56.760 why Russian literature is so beautiful,
01:32:58.980 it's because it's out of all this poverty
01:33:00.660 and you have to speak through the flowers. 0.99
01:33:02.780 That means I can't say fuck the government, 0.99
01:33:05.480 but I can say it in a different way. 0.99
01:33:07.520 That's why, you know, so parameters,
01:33:10.160 like having parameters also create beautiful art.
01:33:13.640 And then when the Soviet Union collapsed,
01:33:15.200 all the floodgates are open. 0.70
01:33:16.840 We get South Park,
01:33:17.960 Chappelle's Show,
01:33:19.060 Knight Rider,
01:33:20.140 MacGyver,
01:33:21.100 Grey's Anatomy,
01:33:22.240 Felicity,
01:33:23.340 Friends.
01:33:26.180 It's all like coming into our consciousness.
01:33:29.800 And then me and another friend,
01:33:31.460 Sander,
01:33:32.160 and another group of guys,
01:33:33.940 the comedy Estonia guys,
01:33:35.240 used to be on our organization back in the days.
01:33:37.560 We were the first generation of comedians.
01:33:39.900 So now we're the first adults
01:33:42.360 talking about stuff that American entertainment talks about,
01:33:48.920 potty mouth stuff, sexual stuff.
01:33:49.980 So they didn't have it before?
01:33:51.300 Not at all.
01:33:52.200 So you didn't, when you were a kid,
01:33:53.500 they didn't have like an Estonian comedian?
01:33:56.100 We had comedic influences, 1.00
01:33:58.100 but it's all controlled by the fucking, 1.00
01:34:00.060 it's all mainstream. 1.00
01:34:01.040 It's all,
01:34:01.600 good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
01:34:03.600 Like Big Bird or something?
01:34:05.200 Yeah, yeah.
01:34:05.980 Like Tonight Show, Johnny Carter,
01:34:07.520 like stuff like that.
01:34:08.540 It's not.
01:34:10.100 So then when we started,
01:34:11.800 We were like first ones at the well, you know, the first ones at the well of creativity.
01:34:16.380 Now that there's no lines, the internet keeps everything open.
01:34:19.520 So it was a big explosion.
01:34:21.860 Open mics would have hundreds of people.
01:34:24.080 In Estonia?
01:34:24.620 Yeah, open mics, literally people squeezing in just to see this new art form.
01:34:29.640 So it was a beautiful explosion. 1.00
01:34:31.280 It's like fucking the Beatles shit, you know? 0.99
01:34:33.700 Yeah, so it was amazing for us, you know? 1.00
01:34:35.860 Dude, that's so cool.
01:34:38.220 It's so incredible, man.
01:34:39.300 The first hours of material, let's be honest, they're not the most original just because, as I said, we're the first ones at the well.
01:34:45.600 I just got the first cup of water.
01:34:47.600 No one's ever made an airplane joke. 0.98
01:34:49.400 I'm going to do a fucking 12-minute closer. 0.98
01:34:51.440 That would be so hacky here. 0.98
01:34:54.200 But it's the first time anyone's talked about this.
01:34:57.500 Wow, dude.
01:34:58.540 That's so wild.
01:35:00.260 Yeah, there is something that's so thankful about, like, let me say something.
01:35:04.320 that's why I think we're in a spot now where comedians sometimes are the people that are
01:35:09.660 the only ones and the few podcasters that are saying something that's like
01:35:14.280 not the mainstream narrative well exactly and that's how that's how podcasts basically took
01:35:20.740 over the media it's just because that the more you subdue the subconsciousness the bigger the
01:35:26.980 release what's that movie this movie is great if you've ever seen it it was the movie Titanic
01:35:32.320 Huh?
01:35:33.160 Titanic.
01:35:33.740 Titanic's so good, huh?
01:35:34.600 It's a great movie.
01:35:35.040 They had it in your country?
01:35:36.460 Late, but I had it.
01:35:37.960 God.
01:35:39.160 I think we're getting Avatar next year, so I'm very excited about that.
01:35:44.000 Dude, yeah.
01:35:44.740 I remember being in Vietnam and they had just gotten Stand By Me when I was over there.
01:35:51.300 Wow. 1.00
01:35:51.780 And they were fucking crazy. 1.00
01:35:53.240 You had all these Vietnamese people dressing up like the characters from Stand By Me and 1.00
01:35:57.100 singing that song. 0.99
01:35:57.860 When the night it come, the land is gone.
01:36:01.340 we all dressed up as Blade
01:36:02.780 when we got Blade
01:36:03.500 remember Blade
01:36:04.140 oh yeah
01:36:04.640 dude everybody had
01:36:05.420 sunglasses and a leather suit
01:36:06.660 if you go to a nightclub
01:36:08.040 it was the
01:36:08.560 the bouncer was Blade
01:36:10.000 the guy getting him
01:36:10.820 was Blade
01:36:11.120 it was Blade
01:36:12.480 IDing Blade
01:36:13.340 it was 0.99
01:36:14.020 everyone was fucking 0.99
01:36:15.200 dude 0.99
01:36:16.080 leather sales
01:36:17.240 skyrocketed
01:36:18.920 I reckon the leather industry
01:36:20.700 in Italy was like
01:36:21.460 man what's happening
01:36:22.580 in Estonia
01:36:23.320 Blade
01:36:23.720 this was me
01:36:24.900 this was all of Estonia
01:36:26.520 for like three years
01:36:27.280 and do they have a lot of
01:36:28.420 black people in Estonia
01:36:29.500 three 1.00
01:36:31.340 good? Yeah. And how's that been? I feel like if we interviewed them, what would they say? Do you
01:36:36.760 think it's been good? Yeah. Okay. So it's been hit or miss. It's been hit or miss for sure. But I
01:36:45.240 would say Estonians, Eastern Europeans, Northern Europeans, you know, um, it's not, see racism is
01:36:56.960 embedded in you having a preconceived notion about a certain group of people. And I would say
01:37:04.840 living in America, it probably gets validated in an echo chamber. If you grow up in a white 0.94
01:37:10.440 neighborhood and it's a racist neighborhood, you're going to have this notion and then you're
01:37:16.860 going to grow up and understand, okay, that was just my childhood. In Estonia, if you don't really
01:37:21.460 have black people around the racism is kind of it's it's firing into darkness yeah i know exactly 0.93
01:37:27.080 what you're saying yeah well i'll be in canada and i'll see like uh black people in some canada 0.99
01:37:31.540 canadian places and it doesn't feel like there's any of the tension and weird shit no that there 0.98
01:37:36.200 is in america and i'm not saying that they're there it feel it's so fucking different you're 0.75
01:37:41.560 like oh this is how things are supposed to be and they also keep like repeating this same narrative 0.64
01:37:47.460 in america like it's getting beat it's gotten like it's like we should be able to i think at
01:37:52.340 some point start to move past some of this stuff it's like what are we still doing i know yeah 0.82
01:37:58.300 exactly you know i'm saying if i'm still chewing a piece of gum from fucking 150 years ago yeah and 0.81
01:38:03.720 and after and there's a taste in my mouth after a while it's because at a certain point you gotta 0.95
01:38:07.640 you know somebody let that gum go yeah just get you know yeah take part of it out of your mouth
01:38:12.080 you know or give it a little bit of a rest sometimes yeah there's some people that just
01:38:15.200 want to chew like some of the same gum and maybe that's messed up for me to say but i just it blew
01:38:20.580 my mind when i was in canada and i was like oh there's not this racial tension here at all
01:38:25.540 yeah and absolutely there's people who are you know it's it's racism due to ignorance is one
01:38:33.100 thing you know yeah and totally i'm not saying that doesn't exist but and and it's like you know
01:38:38.780 estonians we draw band bombs but it doesn't have the history you have here you know like we have
01:38:44.660 we don't even say black people we just drop the word but but you guys have you know you guys 0.95
01:38:51.120 like right here we don't have the word you have right we say like negro which you guys say too
01:38:57.400 and it's not a good word you know right well especially being from the south some of it's
01:39:01.920 like yeah it's all like i agree there's such a history with it like certain terms here that
01:39:06.480 you don't want it like it's not cool exactly so but there's none of that weight attached to that 0.99
01:39:12.200 word so if a white guy will be drunk and yell it at a black guy it's just because he's a fucking 0.99
01:39:17.820 baboon brain but there's no deep conceived fucking hatred behind it right but if a white guy gets 1.00
01:39:24.060 drunk and yells at a black guy that's fucking kind of racist no it's racist the action is racist for 0.99
01:39:28.860 sure but what i'm trying to say is he makes it out of ignorance it's not there's no like right 1.00
01:39:33.560 you know and it's and it's like but yeah i think our media over time kind of perpetuates it or 0.92
01:39:38.960 wants to keep that flame burning because it also keeps a lot of fucking anger in certain communities
01:39:43.700 unity has zero dollars in it division has the bank amen there's no reason to for people to 0.93
01:39:52.080 get along there's no money in us having an open conversation and being happy with our lives 1.00
01:39:58.160 there's no money think about that i fucking hate your ass and i need to be better than you and you 0.99
01:40:03.920 want to be better than me that creates revenue yeah yeah there's no revenue in peace man 1.00
01:40:11.340 yeah
01:40:13.620 oh it's interesting it's sad it's a lot i'd love to talk more um we both have to go to the airport
01:40:23.020 we have to go to the airport so people know that um are you are you excited to travel like to see
01:40:29.980 places like estonia oh dude yes what would you think about that oh i would love to go there man
01:40:35.460 like i i love to travel so much and then i like i mean i hate to say this but it's like you know
01:40:41.560 i got into podcasting and then it's a lot it's a lot and also like work started going really good
01:40:46.800 and then like that's a lot and so it's all been like gifts but um yeah in the next like year or
01:40:51.900 two i would i wouldn't mind maybe falling in love or something going traveling or just going and
01:40:55.760 traveling it'd be nice to have like somebody to do like you know you get those things that you do
01:40:59.860 with my mom wanted to go to italy um i think i might try to take her there so i have to bring
01:41:06.720 it up to her and see if she wants to go do that but dude yeah i want to go see some more places
01:41:10.640 i've been fortunate to see some places um but i would love to get to go see some more like
01:41:16.180 that semester at sea trip was like the first time i ever like got like i remember we pulled like we
01:41:22.480 docked in like south africa wow and dude it would be crazy bro like because you were just i didn't
01:41:27.760 know anybody on this ship. I remember in everybody's families where they're like waving
01:41:31.500 and had poster board and shit. I'm like, and I'll, and I just started waving like strangers 0.78
01:41:35.460 grandmother and shit. Cause I like, I don't even know if I told my family that I was going. So 0.82
01:41:38.540 I'm just fucking, this ship is leaving port and it's just like, and I'm just like, where are we 0.96
01:41:46.260 going? And we sailed for like 14 days and then we get to Japan. Right. So we went from Vancouver to 0.96
01:41:50.980 Japan and, um, and that was crazy. And even when I got into Vancouver, I'd never been there. I
01:41:56.880 went hitchhiking to go up to whistler some dude picked me up this dude his name was mike michael
01:42:03.240 something he was the caretaker for christopher reeves who was superman yeah after chris reeves
01:42:09.140 got hurt he was his caretaker so i got to ride and listen to all these crazy stories about what 0.98
01:42:14.500 it was like like taking care of superman which was just fucking crazy like and shit like that 0.99
01:42:18.880 that was before they had cell phones like shit like you just like i don't know things were so 0.99
01:42:22.680 much more possible and like unique and like everything felt like an adventure then um but 0.97
01:42:28.700 but that whole ship experience was really great and uh and we got to go to different places but
01:42:32.900 i remember we got to south africa and i got off and i was like oh my god like like there's like
01:42:39.640 other people are like living in different places like it just it's hard to conceptualize things
01:42:44.540 until you go places for sure and i would say as much as i've met americans throughout my life and
01:42:50.380 now living here, I would say there's something about Americans that it gets put into a lot of
01:42:56.440 your heads that everywhere else is really dangerous and not good. Like, it's like you're
01:43:04.500 not safe there. And I don't know if it's like capitalism and consumerism trying to put this
01:43:09.360 thing like stay put, stay here, spend your money here, take a loan, you know, this is America.
01:43:14.040 Like, of course, America, number one, we love it. Patriotism is beautiful. Absolutely.
01:43:20.380 But, you know, the rest of the world ain't that bad.
01:43:24.340 No.
01:43:25.140 Oh, it's getting better all the time now.
01:43:26.920 I mean, I think America, especially with the leadership we have now,
01:43:29.840 with the way that we're supporting crimes around the world,
01:43:34.300 with a lot that's been revealed.
01:43:35.480 Like, I love this country.
01:43:36.780 I respect the people that have stood up and fought for it.
01:43:39.280 Absolutely.
01:43:39.940 Especially with our jobs.
01:43:41.180 Like, freedom of speech, if people didn't die for that job,
01:43:44.260 we don't have a job here.
01:43:46.180 Absolutely.
01:43:46.520 You know, we don't even have a job market.
01:43:47.900 And then there's other bigger entities now that are trying to curtail that and these big tech companies are trying to limit what you can say.
01:43:56.840 I think America is in a really, really interesting spot where we need patriots more than ever.
01:44:03.120 And I don't know how we become those.
01:44:04.780 And I don't know also how we fight against the evil that's going on.
01:44:08.160 And the algorithm listens more than the people.
01:44:11.720 Say that again?
01:44:12.600 The algorithm listens more than the people.
01:44:16.020 So what you hear is often wise, dictated.
01:44:21.180 The algorithm makes a decision what you're consuming.
01:44:24.300 And that's wild.
01:44:25.500 That's exactly the opposite of the internet, what it was created for.
01:44:30.120 Because any opinion that the algorithm wants you to have, it will make you have it.
01:44:38.860 And here's the thing.
01:44:40.940 It's very scary.
01:44:41.700 It's not a human.
01:44:42.780 Like, I totally get it.
01:44:44.040 We say an offensive word here, and another person who's maybe a revenue stream or a company that sponsors your podcast, maybe they don't like the word that we use, the slur, and that's a human making that decision.
01:44:54.860 That's a board meeting.
01:44:55.940 It's not my personal preference of a decision, but at least you can validate it to me, to a person.
01:45:03.920 An algorithm deciding, like, between you and a consumer, there's an algorithm, and that decides if that content gets to the consumer.
01:45:12.780 that's not free speech
01:45:14.140 that's an orchestrated
01:45:17.040 version of free speech
01:45:18.560 and that can even be more dangerous than just saying
01:45:21.200 you can't say it
01:45:22.000 yeah I mean and it's fascinating
01:45:24.700 and a lot of people we don't even realize it's going on
01:45:26.900 and we don't realize that
01:45:28.700 have you ever looked at another person's feed
01:45:30.680 how different is it
01:45:32.320 how is that possible
01:45:34.000 are we both living in this country
01:45:36.780 having the same issues
01:45:37.820 how are me and you living in the same country
01:45:41.240 paying taxes for the same government
01:45:43.100 and you get a totally different news feed
01:45:45.920 because the algorithm knows, you know.
01:45:47.540 Yeah, this is what he needs
01:45:48.640 or this is what he doesn't need.
01:45:49.640 Isn't it creepy that,
01:45:50.720 you know, when you scroll,
01:45:53.220 you know, I spoke to a guy
01:45:54.860 who's a programmer.
01:45:56.240 He's from Sweden
01:45:56.840 and he told me they developed this
01:45:58.220 back in the day.
01:45:59.180 He used to work for Spotify.
01:46:00.340 He's a big programmer guy.
01:46:01.260 He sells these patents.
01:46:02.780 And he said that
01:46:04.180 one of the biggest things they've done is,
01:46:06.380 you know, when you're scrolling,
01:46:07.980 if you like a post,
01:46:10.600 That's one thing.
01:46:11.600 But you know what's more valuable for the algorithm?
01:46:14.460 When you scroll past, you stop, you don't like it,
01:46:18.000 and you keep scrolling.
01:46:19.300 That's more points for the algorithm
01:46:21.580 because the algorithm understands,
01:46:24.700 oh, this is something you don't want to show other people you like. 1.00
01:46:28.700 But you love this shit, don't you? 1.00
01:46:31.600 So it knows you better than you. 1.00
01:46:33.860 Dude, and it's like temptation.
01:46:36.560 It's like, and we don't realize when those things come on
01:46:38.820 that you have to fight against that man like if you really want to have discernment like there's
01:46:44.540 never a better time when we realize that people are fighting for your attention right because
01:46:48.140 what you absorb and then you believe you're gonna that's what's going to influence your children
01:46:52.800 and it's like we're at a crucial time attention is money and time and there's one thing you can't
01:46:59.360 get back is time and if you can control what people spend their time on aka their attention
01:47:04.080 you control a whole narrative of history now you know i mean it's it's a it's basically it's a
01:47:09.300 communism it is for sure i mean it is yeah absolutely you're controlling me you know you're
01:47:14.960 making me feel emotions about a certain topic that wasn't even entering my brain it was a beautiful
01:47:20.060 day and a nice flower and now i see this thing on my feet and now i'm upset about something that has
01:47:25.180 nothing to do with me yeah and now that i'm upset i'll resort to things that these are things that
01:47:31.800 sneak into people's lives when for me these are sorry i don't want to preach these are things that
01:47:35.740 sneak into my life when i'm angry um i'll eat something i don't want to eat because i'm just
01:47:39.520 frustrated i'll act out like i'll like maybe try and hit up some girl that i'm not really interested 0.97
01:47:44.420 in bullshit masturbate do do watching porno um just different things once you're agitated they 0.99
01:47:51.260 got you because then you're then you're gonna go buy some other addictive thing yeah and it's a 1.00
01:47:55.760 it's just like oh yeah everything negative has money in it you know no one's no one no one's
01:48:00.500 making money when they're contempt yeah you know and it's like and and we don't and but america is
01:48:05.720 of course a beautiful and it was of course and it was and it was founded on the fact of free speech
01:48:11.800 and alternative thinking that's why stand-up is thriving and the reason i moved here is because
01:48:16.880 i want to practice i want to see how far the rabbit hole of my own mind on stage goes and the
01:48:23.420 only place to do that as basically is america because the level of comedians is so high here
01:48:29.380 because you have generations of free speech
01:48:31.200 and it's beautiful.
01:48:32.360 And it's important to continue doing that.
01:48:34.700 And dude, and I'll say this, man,
01:48:35.980 you've done such, like, yeah, I got to watch you.
01:48:39.440 I think we did some shows there last month or something.
01:48:42.140 It was really great, man.
01:48:43.260 I mean, I love seeing your clips. 1.00
01:48:44.400 Your shit is so funny. 1.00
01:48:45.740 You're so funny too, dude. 1.00
01:48:46.900 Thank you, bro, for just all the entertainment.
01:48:48.820 I appreciate it.
01:48:50.260 And everywhere is beautiful in the world, you know?
01:48:53.160 Like even, dude, my friend,
01:48:54.120 you know what I stuck out recently?
01:48:55.500 I met an old Iranian wrestler back in the day.
01:48:58.140 I used to work in a nightclub in Melbourne.
01:48:59.740 He was a bouncer. 1.00
01:49:00.680 Iranian, they love wrestling. 0.88
01:49:02.280 They're so homophobic, but their history is all...
01:49:04.120 The Iron Sheik, wasn't he an Iranian wrestler?
01:49:05.740 Oh, yeah, they love. 0.51
01:49:07.500 Sheiky.
01:49:08.200 Yeah, they love wrestling.
01:49:09.360 This guy just randomly reached out to me on a message.
01:49:11.820 He was like, hey, I heard you on a podcast.
01:49:13.340 Glad to see you're doing so well.
01:49:14.600 You always used to be funny.
01:49:15.760 I'm happy you found your lane. 1.00
01:49:17.380 And he's in Iran. 0.52
01:49:18.380 He's in Iran.
01:49:19.640 So I go, yeah, thanks, man.
01:49:23.240 You good?
01:49:25.280 And he sends me a picture. 1.00
01:49:26.720 He's getting an operal spritz with bitches on the beach. 1.00
01:49:30.100 And he's like, no, I'm not where the war is at. 1.00
01:49:32.600 And those things always show me, you know, everywhere in the world,
01:49:38.080 there's a guy chilling somewhere, having a little cocktail 0.98
01:49:42.020 or a fresh squeezed orange juice, staring at ass 0.98
01:49:45.820 and trying to be happy in his own life. 0.98
01:49:48.820 And whatever they tell, of course, there's war and atrocities.
01:49:52.100 Absolutely, that's happening.
01:49:53.500 That's confirmed.
01:49:55.000 But don't forget, a lot of people are happy everywhere in the world.
01:50:00.520 Yeah, don't forget to be alive.
01:50:02.020 I mean, yeah, it's easy to get stuck into the things that are negative.
01:50:04.420 It's easy to get stuck.
01:50:05.120 Because I'm like, are you good, dong?
01:50:06.600 And he's like, no, what are you saying?
01:50:08.740 I'm chilling.
01:50:09.800 I got my parents. 1.00
01:50:10.720 I got these bitches. 1.00
01:50:11.600 They're showing me beautiful ladies on the beach. 1.00
01:50:13.280 Yeah, I just dropped my parents off somewhere at a museum. 0.98
01:50:15.820 I'm fucking great. 0.92
01:50:16.920 Yeah. 0.94
01:50:17.320 Yeah, I'm leaving them there for four hours.
01:50:18.920 They think I'm coming to get them in three.
01:50:20.280 There's a great falafel truck here.
01:50:21.960 It's a beautiful day.
01:50:23.040 What are you crying about?
01:50:25.000 I'm great, man.
01:50:26.060 What was that last thing we were going through?
01:50:27.880 There was one kind of closing piece I wanted to have about it.
01:50:31.560 Wait, can I take a picture with my camera of you?
01:50:33.520 For sure.
01:50:33.940 It's just, it's going to be a funny picture.
01:50:35.620 I just like this camera. 1.00
01:50:38.200 Damn. 0.99
01:50:38.740 And you know, okay. 0.99
01:50:39.940 Sorry about that.
01:50:40.680 It's an old camera.
01:50:41.980 And you know, Theo, you're so funny and-
01:50:44.000 It looks new, that camera. 0.99
01:50:45.180 No, it's old as fuck. 0.99
01:50:47.340 And you know, you're so funny that it's crazy that, 0.99
01:50:50.440 you know I saw you as a kid on Real World
01:50:53.720 you know that? Really? Road Rules
01:50:55.780 Road Rules. They had it in your country?
01:50:58.140 MTV. Wasn't it MTV
01:50:59.960 right? Yeah. Yeah and I remember
01:51:01.660 when I met you I was like man
01:51:03.800 I know this guy has Theo on the comedian 0.99
01:51:05.760 but how the fuck? It took me 0.99
01:51:07.660 weeks to figure it out and I used 1.00
01:51:09.920 to watch all that shit. Did you? 1.00
01:51:11.680 It's funny yeah. Wow it's funny that they had
01:51:13.940 it over there. Yeah yeah yeah
01:51:15.900 yeah yeah. It's interesting dude. And it's
01:51:17.820 great that you have this incredible podcast
01:51:19.680 I mean, you've had the president on, and it's great that you're, like, just expanding the common mainstream media by just being a dude who talks to people.
01:51:29.460 It's great, you know.
01:51:30.440 Well, thanks, man.
01:51:31.180 I appreciate that.
01:51:31.940 I've had the president on.
01:51:33.020 I've had Ari Matty on, too. 1.00
01:51:34.440 Look at that.
01:51:34.540 And it's an honor.
01:51:35.360 It's an honor.
01:51:35.740 And the first Estonian that I know, so really cool.
01:51:38.740 And, yeah, I would love to be welcome in your country someday.
01:51:41.020 I mean, I know I am welcome there, but I would love to go there sometime and visit in your home country.
01:51:45.480 And, yeah, dude, we got to get to catch up a little bit more.
01:51:48.220 And yeah
01:51:49.480 Thank you for your time
01:51:50.120 Congrats on all your success
01:51:50.940 You have dates coming up
01:51:52.040 I know it says
01:51:52.440 Comedy on State
01:51:53.300 It's yeah
01:51:54.360 It's A-R-I-M-A-T-T-I dot com
01:51:56.840 That's all my dates
01:51:57.640 I keep adding them
01:51:58.480 All the time
01:51:59.000 I'm on tour
01:51:59.700 Please come see me
01:52:00.680 Let's have some fun
01:52:01.620 I love you guys so much
01:52:02.960 Matt have you been
01:52:03.760 To La Jolla Comedy Store
01:52:04.620 Never
01:52:05.300 That was my favorite
01:52:06.060 I'm shooting a special there
01:52:07.200 You are let's go
01:52:08.240 I'm never
01:52:08.780 But I heard it was so beautiful
01:52:10.700 It's just perfect
01:52:11.980 It's like 0.96
01:52:12.360 There's no bullshit in there 0.72
01:52:14.000 They got Louie running 0.96
01:52:15.780 On the piano over there
01:52:16.980 If he's in there
01:52:17.600 let him cook in the beginning he keeps just the energy in there and they don't play rap music
01:52:22.120 to me and they play piano right which i like because it sets the tone that what you're gonna
01:52:26.960 see here sure it might be messed up but it's art right it's art whereas if you just like bumping
01:52:31.340 some little way in or something which is still great it just gives a different energy right yeah
01:52:34.820 so i love that they do that there and uh yeah it's just like it's a pure thing there's not
01:52:39.640 like they got popcorn and stuff they're not selling people fucking uh creme brulees or 0.84
01:52:44.820 whatever a little fucking leg of uh leg of ramen and california people i have i you know who i 0.97
01:52:50.860 really love i love floridians and i love california people california people they know exactly what i 0.99
01:52:56.080 mean i don't mean la yeah i mean california san diego orange county all that shit they're fun
01:53:03.260 people they're the best dude that's probably oh there's no better place to like to be on stage 0.90
01:53:08.340 oh and the ocean's right there bro i'm a big ocean guy and that's what i really it hurts me
01:53:12.980 in Austin to live.
01:53:13.840 I love Austin,
01:53:14.540 but I'm a big ocean guy.
01:53:16.220 You know what? 0.99
01:53:16.780 If they could fucking 0.99
01:53:17.740 get a little bit 0.99
01:53:18.280 of the ocean somehow,
01:53:19.860 Rogan's got money,
01:53:20.680 ask him.
01:53:21.720 Get us an ocean, Rogan.
01:53:23.580 Yeah.
01:53:24.200 I bet he could do something.
01:53:25.580 Yeah, yeah.
01:53:25.980 He could text somebody.
01:53:27.240 You gotta text somebody.
01:53:28.180 Elon could get
01:53:28.860 a straight of something
01:53:29.800 to pull in there.
01:53:30.400 Every time the security line
01:53:31.600 is too long at the airport,
01:53:32.540 I always text Joe.
01:53:33.260 I go,
01:53:33.900 where's the airport?
01:53:36.440 Yeah, help us out.
01:53:37.040 This is a mothership airport, dude. 0.99
01:53:38.460 He could fucking 1.00
01:53:39.020 buy Spirit Airlines. 1.00
01:53:39.980 Somebody said he might do it.
01:53:40.960 Oh, yeah.
01:53:41.560 That'd be crazy.
01:53:42.480 just for comics
01:53:43.380 Ari Matty
01:53:45.280 thanks so much brother
01:53:46.000 thank you Theo
01:53:46.780 now I'm just floating
01:53:49.020 on the breeze
01:53:50.140 and I feel
01:53:50.960 I'm falling
01:53:51.760 like these leaves
01:53:53.100 I must be
01:53:54.200 cornerstone
01:53:56.420 oh
01:53:59.020 but when I reach
01:54:00.240 that ground
01:54:01.000 I'll share this
01:54:02.020 peace of mind
01:54:03.140 I found
01:54:03.820 I can feel it
01:54:05.200 in my bones
01:54:07.300 but it's gonna take
01:54:12.480 You