This Past Weekend with Theo Von - E295 Nashville

00:00:00.440 Maybe it's some type of skin or something, an animal skin. 0.92

00:00:04.920 So audio is going?

00:00:06.300 Yep, audio is going.

00:00:07.240 Alright.

00:00:08.720 We're all good, okay.

00:00:10.680 And this is going to be the first one here from the Central East out here in Nashville.

00:00:14.340 From that Central East location, good to be here.

00:00:19.460 On the back end today, I got a local sidekick, this fellow Riley.

00:00:23.480 Riley Mao, and you're of age, right?

00:00:25.380 I am.

00:00:26.060 Okay, beautiful man.

00:00:27.840 Alright, let's get into the episode.

00:00:30.000 Oh no, I'm having me a Diet Coke.

00:00:45.220 I'm just sitting on your front porch wondering how could I be so far from my home.

00:00:53.400 And my mind is somewhere else, but when I find it, I'll patch up where it's been grown.

00:01:04.280 Now I'm just floating on the breeze, and I feel I'm feeling like these leaves.

00:01:13.660 I must be gone a song.

00:01:19.000 Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind.

00:01:23.800 I can feel it.

00:01:25.540 Come on, here we go.

00:01:26.680 Let's go, baby.

00:01:28.760 It's life.

00:01:29.160 But it's going to take a little time for me to set that parking brake and let myself on my eye.

00:01:40.160 Shine that light on me.

00:01:44.380 There you go.

00:01:46.500 I'll sit and tell you my stories.

00:01:51.460 Shine on me.

00:01:54.680 And I will find a song.

00:01:58.900 I will sing it just for you.

00:02:04.520 And that's it right there.

00:02:06.760 The shine right there.

00:02:08.560 And you know it because it's the same one every time.

00:02:11.980 You know, it's almost like a ghost.

00:02:13.780 You know, it's there.

00:02:19.680 You know, a lot of people don't want to admit about ghosts.

00:02:23.060 You know, these days, people are too busy for ghosts.

00:02:26.720 You see it a lot.

00:02:27.880 You see they're on the go.

00:02:29.680 You know, people laying there at night, and they're just, you know, they're just, you know, they're busy.

00:02:38.920 They're on their phones.

00:02:40.040 They're looking at an app or something. 0.99

00:02:42.200 Looking at a damn whatever. 0.99

00:02:44.340 Fox Hunter or whatever that. 0.99

00:02:46.120 Robin Hood. 0.99

00:02:47.580 The app that's really got all these, you know, millennials out here taking their own lives and investing in damn Amazon or whatever. 0.99

00:02:54.760 Teslas. 0.99

00:02:56.280 You know, Soundcrack or whatever the damn, whatever that stock is they're on. 0.99

00:03:01.460 But, yeah, people busy. 0.99

00:03:04.020 Too busy for ghosts.

00:03:05.000 And you can feel it if you really think about it.

00:03:08.380 You can feel the ghosts starting to back up in the ether.

00:03:11.860 You can feel them, man.

00:03:15.140 And that's when I get nervous.

00:03:16.300 Because when I was young, you'd see a ghost.

00:03:17.920 You'd hear a ghost.

00:03:18.560 What is that? 1.00

00:03:20.160 That's a damn ghost over there. 1.00

00:03:22.440 You know, it was easy. 1.00

00:03:24.340 Something, you know, it happened outside.

00:03:25.960 It happened inside.

00:03:26.880 What is it?

00:03:27.300 It's a ghost.

00:03:28.860 But now people are too busy for ghosts.

00:03:32.760 And what is the repercussions of that is what I'm wondering.

00:03:39.560 When the dark side, when the, you know, when the ghost, you know, the ghost vestibule or whatever, wherever ghosts are. 0.98

00:03:49.340 Whenever that damn just gets too backed up because nobody's seeing them. 0.98

00:03:52.780 Because I'd be pit, man. 0.99

00:03:56.600 If I'm a ghost and you used to get all, you had all this clout. 0.87

00:04:00.400 And now you're at a, you know, there's a children's sleepover and they don't give a damn. 0.93

00:04:05.600 They don't give a damn.

00:04:08.180 They're doing the, you know, virtual hula hooping or whatever. 0.75

00:04:11.720 Or tick tocking or doing, you know, BLM, the board game.

00:04:16.420 You know, they just, it's just different times.

00:04:19.580 But anyway, man, shout out ghosts.

00:04:22.420 I don't even know what I'm talking about.

00:04:23.560 I'm over here today in, I am in Nashville.

00:04:30.420 Out of the Central East.

00:04:32.400 This is the Central East studio.

00:04:35.360 It's coming along.

00:04:36.840 I'll say that.

00:04:38.800 This thing is coming along, man.

00:04:42.040 It, and you can see it on the YouTube.

00:04:44.680 YouTube, it's, you know, I got here about five days ago, got a painter in, found an old man to paint, and he had a little sidekick with him.

00:04:55.740 And that fellow was using drugs, I think.

00:04:58.320 But not on premises, and I respect that.

00:05:02.000 And nah, and I guess the right amount of drugs.

00:05:05.880 That's what you want.

00:05:06.680 You want painters, you want contractors to be using appropriate amounts of drugs. 0.98

00:05:12.360 Because you get a guy who's got, you know, he's too sped up, and next thing you know, he's painted, you know, he's got your bathroom, he's got a flat enamel in your bathroom, but he's also fucking, you know, he's added a demi-gloss or something to your damn, you know, to your Toyota Tundra. 0.95

00:05:31.860 And he's got half of that, you know, he's spackled all the doors shut. 0.87

00:05:35.800 Because he's gassed up on too much dust. 0.98

00:05:38.840 But you get a man who's just even-steven on the right amount of drugs, and he'll damn paint a one-bedroom. 0.96

00:05:45.700 And that's what we had here. 0.96

00:05:47.720 So, getting again into Nashville.

00:05:49.780 I'm sitting here, if you're on the YouTube, I got a silent assassin here with me today, or semi-silent.

00:05:54.860 And this is a young fellow named Riley Mao.

00:05:58.240 And, um, what is Riley short for, bud?

00:06:01.740 Riley.

00:06:02.860 Okay, man.

00:06:04.480 Okay, so nothing.

00:06:05.740 See, back in the old days, you'd have a longer name, you know?

00:06:08.600 Rolando.

00:06:09.200 You would be, you know, Rolando or, you know, LeRiley or something longer.

00:06:14.600 And Riley would be short for something. 0.84

00:06:16.420 Right.

00:06:17.040 Nope, I'm just Riley.

00:06:18.600 Okay.

00:06:19.840 Alright, beautiful, man.

00:06:21.100 And you, uh, and you are, you're, I don't want to say you are from originally California?

00:06:30.720 Correct.

00:06:31.020 But by way of Japan and Hawaii.

00:06:34.340 I guess so, yeah.

00:06:35.600 Okay.

00:06:36.020 With your family.

00:06:36.900 Yeah, my grand, my grandparents, correct.

00:06:39.440 Beautiful, man.

00:06:41.080 Yeah, them beautiful J-Haws, baby. 0.98

00:06:42.620 I love Hawaii.

00:06:44.760 What island?

00:06:45.800 Uh, I like Maui.

00:06:47.140 I like Oahu.

00:06:49.240 I don't like that, you know, I haven't been to the big one.

00:06:52.440 I haven't been to, um, what is it?

00:06:55.880 The big one.

00:06:56.640 The big island.

00:06:57.680 Yeah, it's just called the big island. 0.99

00:06:59.300 Oh, damn, yeah. 0.99

00:07:00.200 See, I don't even have a name, dude. 0.99

00:07:01.320 I'm not going.

00:07:02.120 You know what I'm saying?

00:07:02.600 I'm the kind of guy, you name it, I'll show up.

00:07:04.600 Oh, yeah.

00:07:05.180 But if it's nameless, man, I'm not, you know.

00:07:07.540 Right.

00:07:07.920 I'm not milling around at that.

00:07:09.180 But we've, we got Riley here off the internet and, uh, and just happy to have some assistance

00:07:14.560 here in Nashville, man.

00:07:15.660 Thank you.

00:07:16.460 Great to be here.

00:07:17.140 Yeah.

00:07:17.340 Thank you very much, brother.

00:07:19.120 Um, what's been going on?

00:07:21.580 Let me think about this, man.

00:07:23.140 Um, so yeah, I got here to Nashville.

00:07:26.600 I want to let people know what's going on.

00:07:28.660 A lot of rumor mills.

00:07:30.100 Oh, Theo knocked a woman up.

00:07:32.560 You know, Theo's got it, you know, he's adopting.

00:07:35.680 And they're doing foster children out there.

00:07:38.860 Rumors.

00:07:40.180 That's rumors. 0.91

00:07:42.440 You know, rumors are just damn, you know, it's not, it's not real information. 0.99

00:07:48.040 It's just bullshit that somebody made up when they were high or something like that. 0.99

00:07:53.060 But the real, the truth is that I'm here and that we're just trying it out. 0.98

00:07:56.880 We got the Central East studio sprouting.

00:07:59.720 Okay.

00:08:01.620 We're bringing in, dude, we're doing unique stuff.

00:08:04.240 We got people of color.

00:08:05.900 Okay.

00:08:06.300 We got Riley Mao in here.

00:08:07.840 We got guests that are going to come on that are unique.

00:08:11.120 We're trying to, you know, change the vibe a little and expound.

00:08:17.780 People say, well, Nashville, what about, well, because it's very, I'll tell you where Nashville

00:08:22.840 is three hours from Cincinnati, four hours from Columbus, two hours from Huntsville, Alabama.

00:08:33.340 Which is kind of almost unfortunate, but 27 hours from Cape Town.

00:08:41.100 If you stop in Amsterdam and Qatar.

00:08:45.440 So it's definitely, it's, you know, we're trying something out.

00:08:50.620 That's it.

00:08:51.220 We're trying something out.

00:08:52.280 There's no other information.

00:08:54.800 There's no wedding bells.

00:08:57.220 There's nothing like that.

00:08:58.140 And if I felt welcome here, that's what I've been asking myself, really.

00:09:03.800 A couple new things.

00:09:05.220 One, I tried the MMA.

00:09:11.120 So I tried it, man.

00:09:12.740 And it's basically, it's like full contact DMT, man.

00:09:17.900 That stuff, MMA is a real thing.

00:09:19.580 And a lot of you guys know I've been, you know, I've been trying it out and having different

00:09:25.320 experiences and, you know, just being a fan.

00:09:30.540 You know, I've been fortunate enough to meet a lot of MMA guys and do that kind of deal.

00:09:37.180 And so now I'm like just trying to check it out.

00:09:39.480 I went in there.

00:09:40.200 And I got, well, they made me fight the women, which is fine, you know, and I don't like 1.00

00:09:47.520 to call them women, but they seem like women.

00:09:49.580 I'll say that.

00:09:50.220 Beautiful ladies. 0.98

00:09:52.080 And, and they whooped me, man.

00:09:55.260 And they were strawweight.

00:09:56.360 One of them was strawweight.

00:09:58.140 And, and I guess I'm strawweight.

00:10:03.780 And I'm scarecrow straw, I think.

00:10:05.620 That's the kind of straw that's in me.

00:10:06.900 Um, but I got in there.

00:10:10.140 It was over at Nashville MMA.

00:10:12.480 Um, I hit up Mike Chandler and he got me squared up, squared away over there.

00:10:17.540 And, uh, and it was fun, man.

00:10:19.700 It was, you know, you get in there and you get in the outfit.

00:10:23.820 Um, you get into the gi and you're just, you know, it's very, I mean, you feel like you

00:10:30.780 could beat anybody in Antifa or any of these proud boys. 0.99

00:10:33.520 You could whip any of their butts. 1.00

00:10:34.680 You get in there. 0.99

00:10:35.280 You just kind of, your arms or your weapons, your legs, your feet.

00:10:39.800 And, uh, yeah, I mean, I had to fight the women. 1.00

00:10:43.620 You know, it was definitely, it was, there was definitely that moment, um, where it was

00:10:50.380 like, okay, I'm excited.

00:10:51.620 I'm keyed up.

00:10:52.300 I'm in here.

00:10:53.020 And then they're like, okay, you, you know, Barbara's going to, you know, Barbara's going

00:10:59.660 to put you in a leg lock or somebody, you know, when I was young, if you wanted to know

00:11:03.800 a woman, you had to go, you know, you had to look in her window, you had to lurk, you 0.99

00:11:08.600 had to be.

00:11:09.060 Now there's more stalkers.

00:11:11.460 Everybody's a stalker.

00:11:12.720 If you go meet somebody in person, you drive past their house or you park in their, you

00:11:17.140 know, in their driveway and have a smoothie or whatever.

00:11:19.920 You're a criminal. 0.94

00:11:21.560 When I was young, that was flirting. 0.89

00:11:23.520 Kind of, you drive over there and sit outside, say, Hey, you know, yeah, they were startled,

00:11:28.640 but it was, it was a little more of that primal kind of like, um, have you ever seen that

00:11:35.420 animal on the nature channel that makes its feathers real big?

00:11:38.200 So the other birds will come by.

00:11:39.560 It was like that.

00:11:41.480 It was like that.

00:11:43.000 So, um, what else happened to me?

00:11:47.240 Uh, well, I've already run into some issues here locally.

00:11:50.320 I will say this at the parks here.

00:11:52.480 I took a little bit of bread out there.

00:11:54.420 You know, I took some biscuit out there to the lake to feed to some ducks.

00:12:00.800 And you know me, man, if I'm in a new area, I like to get acclimated with the animals,

00:12:04.820 bro.

00:12:05.120 I'll pet an animal, you know, I'll pick a snail up and walk three or four feet and set 0.99

00:12:10.360 him down, you know, save him fucking five days of travel. 0.99

00:12:13.920 That's who I am. 0.99

00:12:15.780 You know, I'll pet a dog.

00:12:17.200 I'll whistle at a falcon. 0.99

00:12:18.660 I'll fucking, you know, I go out and feed a duck. 0.99

00:12:22.380 I see a duck. 0.99

00:12:23.440 I feed a duck.

00:12:24.120 And I give a duck bread, right?

00:12:27.020 But I give them biscuit.

00:12:29.240 I had breakfast.

00:12:30.880 They had half a biscuit left.

00:12:32.960 You know, I'm watching my figure since I'm doing MMA now.

00:12:35.980 I'm strawweight.

00:12:37.020 I'm currently female strawweight. 0.97

00:12:39.980 And, uh, and so next thing you know, I'm feeding biscuit, man.

00:12:45.260 And these ducks are fired up.

00:12:47.560 Uh, these ducks are really keyed up.

00:12:49.360 You could see ducks in the distance looking.

00:12:51.520 You could see ducks that haven't even been born yet.

00:12:53.480 You could see a duck peek out of the egg, you know, just hearing that there's a kind 0.98

00:12:58.080 of a new boss man in town, you know, a new fucking yeast Santa, you know, I'm out there 0.99

00:13:02.700 delivering goods. 0.99

00:13:03.680 So I'm feeding, I'm got, you know, I got half of a nice biscuit.

00:13:07.940 And this is an expensive biscuit.

00:13:09.020 It's probably a two and a half dollar biscuit.

00:13:11.160 So we're looking at a dollar 25 worth of biscuit bread. 1.00

00:13:14.480 I'm out there feeding these bastards over there. 1.00

00:13:16.400 Perennial Lake or whatever it's called. 1.00

00:13:18.000 Perennium Lake.

00:13:19.520 By the gesta, uh, by the vestibule or something.

00:13:22.260 So anyway, I'm feeding them.

00:13:24.180 Next thing you know, I started getting, I put it on my Instagram story.

00:13:27.240 I started getting DMs.

00:13:28.460 People angry.

00:13:29.160 You can't give them bread.

00:13:31.200 You can't give them bread.

00:13:32.960 You know, they'll die.

00:13:35.820 You know, they'll, Oh, this is what they, they said. 0.99

00:13:38.380 Oh, if you give them bread, they get too jacked up on energy and they will rape each other. 0.92

00:13:44.360 Look, man, I'm not doing all of that.

00:13:52.080 I took a half a biscuit and went out there to treat these animals to get acclimated to the area.

00:13:58.900 If somebody else, if they're doing all of it, you know, I'm not doing part of sexual abuse for animals.

00:14:04.920 I'm not doing any of this.

00:14:07.140 If they don't want bread, they shouldn't come eat it.

00:14:09.960 That's not on me.

00:14:11.260 People attacking me. 1.00

00:14:12.360 You're going to hell bread boy. 0.99

00:14:15.380 And then sending me two, uh, caskets and a picture of a duck emojis, man. 0.98

00:14:24.060 That's mother nature, man. 0.54

00:14:25.280 If there's a glitch in her pattern, they will, she will work it out.

00:14:29.540 And these ducks look like they wanted the bread.

00:14:31.660 That's the thing.

00:14:33.300 You know, it's like, Oh, they can't digest it. 0.99

00:14:35.240 They will rape each other. 1.00

00:14:38.120 Well, look, man, I'm not, I didn't come to town to be part of that. 0.98

00:14:42.360 You know, I'm not doing no sex traffic and I'm not doing that kind of stuff.

00:14:45.340 I'm not doing, you know, I came here.

00:14:47.780 I just, you know, I'm trying to get acclimated to the area.

00:14:52.780 You know, when I was a child, ducks would eat bread.

00:14:55.360 Have you ever given bread to a duck rally?

00:14:56.700 I have.

00:14:58.200 And did you, I mean, what are you, or, you know, it's, it's a lot of the youngsters getting

00:15:02.760 at me, a lot of millennials coming at me, you know, do you know any of this information?

00:15:09.340 I don't.

00:15:10.300 Um, when I was back in California where I'm originally from, um, I live around what's

00:15:16.920 called East Lake village and there's always a whole bunch of ducks in the lake all the

00:15:21.280 time.

00:15:21.580 Um, I would always, as a kid, go out there and feed the ducks that that's what I would

00:15:26.260 do in my childhood.

00:15:28.120 Um, it was just a big thing that everyone in the community did.

00:15:31.420 It's a piece of culture.

00:15:32.340 I feel like, right.

00:15:33.320 I feel like it's a piece of, piece of youth culture.

00:15:35.340 It is.

00:15:36.020 And do you, and I feel like that, that stretches over all cultures too.

00:15:40.360 I feel like if you were black, white, uh, Malaysian, whatever.

00:15:45.720 Right.

00:15:45.960 Feeding a bread to a duck is normal.

00:15:48.860 Right.

00:15:49.220 I've seen literally anybody I could imagine doing it.

00:15:52.820 Right.

00:15:53.280 Exactly.

00:15:53.900 Amen.

00:15:55.520 So anyway, right out of the gate, they're jumping on me there.

00:15:59.560 You know, you're bad.

00:16:00.880 What are you doing?

00:16:02.100 Take your bread back to California.

00:16:04.520 And then they would call me the F word F a G, you know, just like, like, come on, man.

00:16:10.180 You know, it's just, it's like, you can't do anything these days without somebody jumping 0.98

00:16:16.000 down your throat and opening up a damn kitchenette, you know, full of mostly knives. 0.99

00:16:22.400 It's just that kind of place, man. 1.00

00:16:24.220 Uh, that kind of vibe, not the place here in Nashville.

00:16:27.780 I'm just saying that kind of vibe in the world sometimes.

00:16:31.480 Um, what else happened?

00:16:34.820 Uh, oh, I got to announce this.

00:16:37.020 I am going to be doing some live shows.

00:16:41.680 You know, I'm a performer, uh, Riley Mao.

00:16:45.640 I do performing.

00:16:46.440 I do stand up.

00:16:47.440 I do.

00:16:48.800 I'm an artist, I guess you would say not.

00:16:51.120 I wouldn't say artist, but you know, I do comedy.

00:16:55.820 And so I'm going to be doing live shows.

00:16:57.860 I'm just letting them know that.

00:16:59.760 Thank you.

00:17:01.160 Um, I'm going to be performing in Dubuque and Des Moines.

00:17:04.480 That's going to be September 25th and 26th, I believe.

00:17:08.340 And those, uh, that's all going to go on sale on Wednesday of this week or Tuesday.

00:17:15.400 Probably Wednesday, I think.

00:17:17.160 And, uh, you can see it on the IG.

00:17:20.120 Uh, you can see it online on socials.

00:17:22.680 Um, and those are going to be outdoor shows.

00:17:25.820 Those are going to be different outdoor shows.

00:17:27.820 And, uh, and we're going to just see how that goes.

00:17:30.340 I'm experimenting.

00:17:31.020 Uh, I'm going to experience it.

00:17:32.840 And I'm just going to lean into it.

00:17:35.120 Um, what else?

00:17:39.100 I hope everybody had a wonderful Labor Day.

00:17:42.220 You know, I hope, um, you know, it's a weird year for Labor Day because a lot of people haven't had work.

00:17:52.860 But a lot of people are getting back to work.

00:17:55.520 That's one thing I'm noticing.

00:17:56.800 People are getting back to work.

00:18:01.320 You know, a few weeks ago, I felt like with the virus, it was like people were pretending.

00:18:04.960 Like we all started to kind of pretend.

00:18:07.660 And now I feel like people are just like, you know what?

00:18:09.840 I'm, I'm going to work.

00:18:12.440 And for the most part, people seem to be doing okay.

00:18:15.300 Um, except for this freaking lady, this FL, who works out at Big Lots, I'll say this. 1.00

00:18:28.280 Now we support a lot of small businesses, big businesses, you know, from time to time, we'll even sell you some bullshit on here. 0.98

00:18:37.000 Um, against our own knowledge. 0.99

00:18:41.420 You know, I've read ads for something and the next thing you know, I get it and I'm like, damn. 0.99

00:18:46.600 You know? 0.98

00:18:47.740 Like a hammock with a hot tub in it. 1.00

00:18:49.620 Just, you know, sometimes people are just selling a real piece of shit. 0.99

00:18:53.520 Excuse my language, man. 0.99

00:18:54.600 Excuse my language also, Riley.

00:18:56.500 Not a problem.

00:18:57.520 Okay.

00:18:57.860 Do you, where you're from, do you guys use a lot of profanity or what is it like over there?

00:19:00.880 So, I am a Christian, um, and, and an Eagle Scout.

00:19:05.660 Um, I don't do swearing at all.

00:19:08.140 Okay.

00:19:08.400 Um, that's just not me.

00:19:09.580 But I mean, hey, I don't, I don't judge.

00:19:11.440 Okay.

00:19:12.780 Well, you can judge me.

00:19:14.100 I'm going to let you know that.

00:19:15.360 Awesome.

00:19:16.160 You can judge me up until the point that I'm willing to accept it.

00:19:20.660 And then I'm going to try to use less of it around you then.

00:19:24.800 All right.

00:19:25.260 I might write some of the words down and show you some of the ones in advance that I'm going to use from now on.

00:19:28.940 I just, I just don't want there to be not fair communication.

00:19:32.660 Okay.

00:19:32.980 All right.

00:19:33.740 Cool, man.

00:19:34.300 Thank you.

00:19:34.960 Well, I will tell you this though.

00:19:36.360 If you want to go to Big Lots, it is a real H-E-L-L of a store.

00:19:45.000 Okay.

00:19:45.380 If you want to go to Big Lots Mercantile, you roll in there, they don't even know what they're selling anymore.

00:19:52.020 You know, they had a 180 ounce coffee pot in the front.

00:19:56.840 What? 0.99

00:19:57.160 And it came with the maker, the coffee maker looked like a damn washing machine. 0.98

00:20:05.080 You know, just like who, you would need half a family to even tip the thing over and pour a cup or a bucket. 0.97

00:20:13.420 You know, I guess it's for, you know, that kind of that group think mentality or whatever.

00:20:17.720 But, but anyway, I'm in there.

00:20:20.660 I'm looking for stuff.

00:20:22.840 You know, excuse me, a little bit of, my chest is acting up.

00:20:30.540 I have, I'm having a Diet Coke.

00:20:32.680 It's just a mini.

00:20:33.840 It's 7.5 ounces, but, um, so anyway, I'm at the Big Lots and I'm trying to get a few things and I don't want to be there.

00:20:41.960 I wish I'd have walked into a Target, but I'd been driving and I was wearing shoes with no socks and my feet were real sweaty and I was angry.

00:20:54.440 I started to get angry.

00:20:56.260 I hadn't eaten breakfast and it was about 1.30 and, and I just couldn't handle myself anymore and I was just angry.

00:21:07.280 And the car, I got a rental car, it keeps gearing into S and I don't know what that is.

00:21:15.200 You know, I've seen the regulars, you know, N, D, P, R.

00:21:21.700 And this one, every time you try to go to D, it ends up in S and I just don't know what's going on and just, I was just furious, man.

00:21:28.080 So I parked in a dang, you know, when I get angry where I'm from, if men get upset, they would drive over to a Winn-Dixie.

00:21:37.980 Which was a chain grocer and they would park in the lot.

00:21:43.220 Sometimes you'd see them crying over there or, you know, looking at pornography, pleasure in themselves, all kind of stuff.

00:21:51.120 But it was kind of like a, it was just like a place where men would escape.

00:21:56.680 They'd park their truck behind the Winn-Dixie in the parking lot and then they would just, you know, almost release whatever they had to do.

00:22:05.840 And whether it was sexual or emotional, you'd see somebody crying so hard they'd open the truck of their door to let the tears all out.

00:22:13.980 You know, like they were vomiting.

00:22:14.920 And, um, and now, uh, so anyway, so that flares up in me sometimes.

00:22:23.280 So that's what happened.

00:22:24.800 You know, I pull over there.

00:22:26.140 I haven't eaten.

00:22:26.720 And I've been, I was trying to eat healthy.

00:22:29.940 That was my goal for the day. 0.99

00:22:31.100 And all I can think about is a damn Wendy's, you know, junior, whatever it is, whatever killed Dave Thomas, his favorite one, that one, the good one. 0.98

00:22:39.380 So I'm thinking about that and I don't have socks on in my shoes and I don't care in the beginning of the day if I wear socks without shoes. 0.99

00:22:47.080 I think it's kind of stylish, but halfway through the day, your feet get sweaty and then I can feel myself ruining my shoes.

00:22:55.080 And these were nice shoes.

00:22:56.380 They were a gift from someone.

00:22:57.520 So I'm just losing it.

00:23:00.900 And I'll just say, look, man, I just, I got to get a few things.

00:23:04.100 I'm going to go into a place called big lots.

00:23:08.640 So I go in, I got me a few items.

00:23:11.260 I get to the register.

00:23:13.740 Um, oh no.

00:23:15.120 First, when I went in, the lady immediately pulls me over to sign up for a $5 gift card, right?

00:23:22.780 Now I'm going to be, do I look successful to you or not?

00:23:27.520 And you can be totally honest.

00:23:29.340 You look very successful.

00:23:30.460 Really?

00:23:30.960 Mm-hmm.

00:23:32.080 Just the way that you, um, present your presentation.

00:23:37.880 Well, present your presentation.

00:23:39.020 The way you just act on camera.

00:23:42.000 The way that you show what you do.

00:23:45.580 Okay.

00:23:46.480 Okay, good.

00:23:47.420 Thank you.

00:23:48.280 Thank you.

00:23:48.740 Thank you.

00:23:49.140 Good to hear the millennial perspective.

00:23:50.740 Uh, and what I'm saying is this, man, that I,

00:23:56.900 I, I'm happy to be a part of everything.

00:23:59.860 I want to be a part of society.

00:24:01.100 I want to be a regular man.

00:24:04.180 I do not need to spend 12 minutes getting a $5 off coupon.

00:24:10.640 Okay.

00:24:11.740 This lady couldn't figure out the machine and I wanted to leave. 1.00

00:24:14.440 I wanted to go.

00:24:15.200 I wanted to get the few things.

00:24:16.320 I was already angry.

00:24:17.760 I wanted that, you know, that bacon doubler or whatever.

00:24:21.580 I just, I had sweat in my shoes.

00:24:24.080 I was sad.

00:24:25.260 I was just disappointed. 0.99

00:24:26.440 I just wanted to be behind the damn Winn-Dixie and I'd been, I'd honestly masturbated a couple 1.00

00:24:32.260 nights in a row. 0.99

00:24:32.840 I don't like to, this is something I probably shouldn't tell you since we don't even know

00:24:35.880 each other and who knows if we're even going to work together, uh, Riley and Mal, but I 0.96

00:24:39.720 do not prefer to masturbate. 0.98

00:24:44.380 It doesn't make me feel good. 0.96

00:24:46.040 So I do it sometimes as a, I don't want to do it.

00:24:50.800 So just letting you know that.

00:24:52.060 So you know what I'm referencing when I say that.

00:24:53.800 But anyway, so I didn't want to do it and anyway, so next thing I'm at Big Lots, I get

00:24:59.180 the dang thing.

00:24:59.980 It's five minutes, but the whole time she's having me fill out this form and stuff and

00:25:04.880 get the gift card and I don't want to be at Big Lots.

00:25:08.460 I don't want to be at Big Lots, dude.

00:25:10.680 I parked there because I was not feeling good and I went inside at a certain point.

00:25:17.420 You just, you know, I figured I, you know, they have a, maybe a protein bar.

00:25:23.000 I need to see about getting a desk for the studio.

00:25:25.720 You know, maybe it'll have some things, but I get in the first thing you see, they got 0.95

00:25:30.100 a hundred and eight, you know, 85 ounce damn coffee pot and there's a kid shooting a basketball 0.96

00:25:36.100 into it. 0.99

00:25:36.460 I'm just like, what in this store makes no sense.

00:25:39.800 You know, they got the world's largest pillow or something.

00:25:42.540 It's like eight feet by eight feet.

00:25:44.060 Where are you going to use it?

00:25:48.540 There's no place for that.

00:25:51.040 So anyway, there's just a lot of stuff in there that you don't need and that's why they're

00:25:55.640 going out of business.

00:25:56.660 Well, anyway, the lady, the lady keeps asking me if I'm wearing cologne. 0.98

00:26:01.600 I'm not wearing any cologne, right?

00:26:04.220 And she won't take no for an answer, not being real, real cool.

00:26:08.600 Anyway, anyway, I walk around there and, uh, and it just, nothing makes any sense.

00:26:16.920 They'll have like a, um, a thing of Cheetos, like a, literally like a burlap bag full of

00:26:24.160 Cheetos and then right next to it, they'll have like an aquarium and then they'll have,

00:26:29.520 um, one of those fountains, like a fake stone fountain where the little guy is urinating

00:26:36.720 into the bird bath.

00:26:37.840 You know what I'm talking about, Riley?

00:26:38.940 You ever seen those or not?

00:26:40.980 I've seen them everywhere.

00:26:42.280 You have?

00:26:42.820 I have.

00:26:43.480 Okay.

00:26:44.140 And when you see that, what do you feel like?

00:26:46.100 What is that?

00:26:48.380 What is that?

00:26:49.200 Is that cool?

00:26:49.980 Is that lame?

00:26:50.740 What is it?

00:26:51.200 I mean, I, I just don't really, I don't really have an opinion.

00:26:56.580 I just, I see it and I just disregard it.

00:26:59.320 I, I mean, I couldn't care less, honestly.

00:27:03.000 Okay.

00:27:03.660 And there you go.

00:27:04.440 That's the young perspective.

00:27:05.700 They don't care and it's fine.

00:27:08.820 I'm not judging you or anything.

00:27:10.160 I'm just, when I was young, when they, when they came out with the bird bath baby that would

00:27:15.580 urinate the little sheriff or whatever, the little angel boy.

00:27:21.200 And he's urinating into the bird bath.

00:27:23.700 Oh, dude.

00:27:25.220 It was like, that was our 4k.

00:27:33.100 You know, that was, that was our Vietnam.

00:27:40.260 That was, it was so exciting.

00:27:41.960 No one had ever seen it.

00:27:43.620 A bird bath had just been a place where birds would come to bathe and kind of go on about

00:27:48.220 their business.

00:27:49.600 And now suddenly it was this, you know, there was a stone baby and he's urinating.

00:27:55.160 It was just more exciting.

00:27:57.260 So anyway, um, but anyway, this is all besides the point.

00:28:03.140 Um, so I, here's what happened is I get some stuff that I do not want and I'm buying out

00:28:08.860 of sheer anger.

00:28:09.700 I'm wandering around the store.

00:28:12.560 Um, I'm just, I'm not well.

00:28:15.940 Every other aisle has sandals in it.

00:28:17.840 It's just like, what is going on here?

00:28:20.520 What is going on here? 0.99

00:28:22.860 It's basically like a trap house for, it's almost like a halfway house for shit that should 0.99

00:28:29.920 be at target. 0.99

00:28:31.520 It's like, oh, here's a lawn chair that got, that was doing heroin.

00:28:36.140 You know, here's a, uh, oh, here's a swing set that they caught with a couple grams of

00:28:40.640 coat.

00:28:41.200 You know, it's just everything there kind of, it's like, it's all part of a big foster

00:28:46.920 family or something and nobody's paying the rent.

00:28:48.980 That's what big lots is.

00:28:50.080 If you haven't been to big lots.

00:28:51.860 So anyway, I'm leaving.

00:28:53.220 I'm at the end of my rope and at the end of my journey in there.

00:28:57.980 And I did, I will be honest.

00:28:59.320 I ate two protein bars in there that I, I paid for one of them.

00:29:05.480 I'll be honest with you.

00:29:06.880 I don't want to lie to you, Riley.

00:29:08.460 I paid for one of them, you know, and in your culture, do people lie a lot?

00:29:15.340 Is there a lot of dishonor in lying?

00:29:21.120 Yeah.

00:29:21.780 Yeah.

00:29:21.960 There's a lot of lying.

00:29:23.180 I mean, a lot of it could be, I mean, there's plenty of examples.

00:29:26.700 Um, lying could entail, um, what was I going to say?

00:29:33.160 Keeping surprises.

00:29:34.860 Um, I see.

00:29:36.320 That's one of them.

00:29:37.220 Another one could be, I mean, just, just flat out lying because they don't want to maybe

00:29:41.400 hurt someone.

00:29:42.580 Um, it honestly depends, but yeah, lying is a big thing.

00:29:45.280 It, it just honestly depends on what the lying is about.

00:29:48.400 Okay.

00:29:49.060 And in your grandparents' culture, they, do they, do you notice anything different between

00:29:53.540 your grandparents' culture and your parents' culture as opposed to lying?

00:29:58.200 I'm just trying to get to the root.

00:29:59.500 I know your family has deeper roots in the universe probably than mine.

00:30:03.160 So, I'm just trying to establish, uh, do they care more about lying?

00:30:10.120 Do you feel like?

00:30:11.980 Yes.

00:30:12.600 Okay.

00:30:12.900 Yeah.

00:30:13.140 I feel so.

00:30:13.760 I feel that.

00:30:14.480 There you go.

00:30:15.100 Thank you.

00:30:15.700 So, what I'm saying is this.

00:30:16.840 I'm at big lots.

00:30:17.680 I'm leaving.

00:30:18.300 And the lady, I get up to the register and I'll say this.

00:30:22.140 The lady was not nice. 1.00

00:30:23.780 I tried to be cool.

00:30:25.160 I said, hello.

00:30:26.200 How are you doing?

00:30:27.160 No response.

00:30:29.760 Zero response.

00:30:30.760 And I'm already not doing well.

00:30:33.660 Okay.

00:30:34.940 I'm already not doing well.

00:30:39.900 Okay.

00:30:40.500 I have 200 feet of telephone cable in my buggy. 0.99

00:30:47.160 I have shit I do not need in there. 0.99

00:30:50.680 Okay. 1.00

00:30:51.780 I got a 60 pack of Baby Ruth minis.

00:30:55.560 I don't want any of this.

00:30:57.640 I want to get out of the store.

00:30:59.300 And I already feel compromised.

00:31:01.660 I've got the $5 coupon.

00:31:03.020 I've already spent the time getting it.

00:31:04.720 I feel like I at least need to use it.

00:31:08.300 I did get two throw pillows that aren't that bad.

00:31:12.020 Anyway.

00:31:13.280 The lady, not being nice. 0.99

00:31:16.500 Very Rubenesque woman. 0.98

00:31:18.920 Okay.

00:31:19.160 And, and, and I'm not striking low here.

00:31:23.940 I'm just saying she wasn't cool and her name tag said Largish on it. 1.00

00:31:31.160 Now, if you're going to have a child, we all probably have, you know, I don't have children.

00:31:39.240 You have children?

00:31:41.920 Okay.

00:31:43.020 Well, you're going to have them probably.

00:31:45.580 Or you could probably still be adopted if you wanted to be.

00:31:47.640 But what I'm telling you, man, is that if you have a child and you don't name it something that I get, you don't have a child that could be big and name it Largish.

00:32:02.160 Okay.

00:32:02.940 And the lady's giving me a, a hard time. 1.00

00:32:06.760 And I don't know if it was, if it was Indian or Native American.

00:32:10.700 Um, but Largish was not happy.

00:32:12.660 She put all of my stuff I bought into one bag.

00:32:16.980 Okay.

00:32:18.900 Okay, Riley.

00:32:21.520 Yes.

00:32:22.380 Yes.

00:32:22.780 Like I'm Santa Claus or something, right?

00:32:24.600 Like everything into one sack.

00:32:27.020 And she can tell if she would have looked in my eyes, she would know I'm not doing.

00:32:30.980 And I wasn't doing very well.

00:32:34.800 Um, so anyway, man, it just was a rough welcome.

00:32:38.720 It was a rough welcome here.

00:32:41.740 You know, it was a really, really rough welcome between, um, between Largish being a real piece.

00:32:50.800 Just not, just not cool.

00:32:54.040 You know?

00:32:54.700 And, and I, even when I left, I, I, I didn't look at her name tag immediately.

00:33:01.780 And then I was like, oh, well, I just tried to be nice.

00:33:03.960 You try to one up them at the end and still be nice, you know?

00:33:07.360 And I said, oh, thank you very much.

00:33:09.180 And then I looked at the tag.

00:33:10.700 And I could barely get the Largish.

00:33:15.680 It just, cause it almost seemed like I was making fun of her because she was a larger woman.

00:33:21.580 You know?

00:33:23.160 Like if you have a daughter and you're, say if you're, if you are Rubenesque, you're, you know.

00:33:28.580 Uh, I'm just saying if you and your wife or spouse have some physical attribute, if both y'all are bigger people, you're not going to name your son Fat Randall.

00:33:43.540 You know?

00:33:44.180 You just, it just, it's not going to behoove him.

00:33:48.400 You know?

00:33:49.300 You're not going to name your boy Lil, uh, Big Rounder.

00:33:53.840 You know?

00:33:55.200 Or Marble Daddy.

00:33:56.820 Or Gravity Junkie.

00:33:58.280 You know, you're not going to name your kid things.

00:34:01.140 So, anyway. 1.00

00:34:02.160 But Largish was a real bitch. 1.00

00:34:03.980 And I'm sorry to say that. 1.00

00:34:04.980 I know you're in here.

00:34:06.780 And, uh, and I shouldn't have said it again.

00:34:12.060 I know you do, though.

00:34:13.320 And I don't want to, I just don't want things to get out of control.

00:34:16.860 So, anyway.

00:34:18.960 Um, but yeah, I'm here in Nashville, man.

00:34:21.640 I'm excited.

00:34:22.240 I did, uh, oh, I'll tell you what happened.

00:34:25.000 And today's episode is brought to you by Hawthorne.

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00:34:31.740 People have been smelling bad for centuries, decades even. 0.68

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00:34:50.020 And they all stink, man.

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00:34:57.640 But what I'm telling you is that you can change all of that.

00:35:01.200 I mean, you want to smell so good that it gets into your DNA.

00:35:05.520 And the company, the group, the outfit that can help you is called Hawthorne.

00:35:13.100 You know, I went to their website and they have a website online and you could even do it on your phone.

00:35:17.240 And they ask you a couple of things about yourself.

00:35:20.520 Well, are you active or are you inactive?

00:35:22.500 You know, are you skydiving or are you wheelcharing?

00:35:26.060 You know, they ask you what kind of, you know, do you like to wear tank tops or do you like to wear a suit?

00:35:30.680 Do you like to be outside with your children?

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00:35:38.620 They ask you different things, questions, quizzicals.

00:35:42.520 And you answer them.

00:35:43.400 And then at the end of the quiz, they hit you with two cents.

00:35:47.240 Two fragrances, bro.

00:35:49.540 And they say, hey, this is how you smell.

00:35:51.320 This is how you could smell.

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00:36:33.680 But they also sell deodorant, shampoo, body wash, face cleanser, lotion, etc.

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00:37:20.480 Now is the time to celebrate.

00:37:26.320 Football is finally back.

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00:37:29.820 I'm not a big fan.

00:37:30.780 Okay, great, man.

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00:39:20.120 Oh.

00:39:22.680 Now Riley, uh.

00:39:25.480 Do you ever, you ever donated blood?

00:39:27.960 I have.

00:39:28.980 There you go, man.

00:39:30.700 That's what I'm talking about, man.

00:39:32.040 And so you don't see a lot of that.

00:39:33.540 You know, you youngsters don't know what it's like, man.

00:39:35.440 When I was growing up, blood, you know, now there's tons of blood.

00:39:40.400 Now you drive down the highway, you see, you know, 0.98

00:39:43.400 you'll see blood on the damn side of the road. 0.97

00:39:47.800 But when I was young, blood was a real commodity. 0.97

00:39:50.040 You know, when I was growing up, blood was a, there just wasn't as much blood, man.

00:39:56.500 You'd, you'd, you'd have a friend that'd have eight, eight pints in them.

00:39:59.880 You know, and the requirement is nine.

00:40:02.780 You'd have a friend, you'd shake his hand and it would feel like, almost like a beanbag chair.

00:40:08.020 Because you'd be a little light on blood, you know.

00:40:11.980 But now everybody's got blood and it's just, I'm just saying, you guys are spoiled, man.

00:40:18.340 You kids are real spoiled.

00:40:20.560 All right, man.

00:40:21.320 Let's get into a little bit more of what happened, dude.

00:40:23.680 And I want to say, uh, I don't usually get angry, but man, Largish. 1.00

00:40:28.040 You got to G up, boo.

00:40:32.660 Because that attitude ain't going to help you.

00:40:36.100 You know, and then packing my bag like I'm Santa, bro.

00:40:39.180 Dude, I had to walk out of Big Lots with two hands.

00:40:42.560 Two, two, two hands on the thing of my bag.

00:40:48.320 Walking out of there.

00:40:49.000 What are you, are you paying attention, Raleigh?

00:40:52.120 I am indeed.

00:40:53.220 Okay.

00:40:54.400 Just seem like you're not, but that's all right.

00:40:56.220 Oh, no, I definitely am.

00:40:57.160 Okay, thank you, brother.

00:40:58.580 I do not believe you, but I do appreciate that.

00:41:01.320 All right, let's get into a call right here.

00:41:03.260 Now, Raleigh, what we do on this show is calls come in sometimes.

00:41:07.400 You know, and a lot of people are like, why is Raleigh in here?

00:41:09.800 Why is he in the room?

00:41:11.080 It's usually a solo episode.

00:41:13.920 And I don't know the answer.

00:41:17.560 You know, I just, I don't know the answer.

00:41:20.940 You know, I was nervous.

00:41:22.420 I'm in a new place.

00:41:23.540 We're trying something new.

00:41:25.400 By just being in a new place.

00:41:29.380 Nick isn't here.

00:41:31.180 Nick came here for a few days.

00:41:33.800 He seemed a little stoned when he showed up.

00:41:37.600 That's judgment.

00:41:38.840 Is that judgment, Raleigh?

00:41:39.940 I don't think it is.

00:41:42.500 Thanks.

00:41:44.160 But Nick will think it is, though.

00:41:45.760 I do know that.

00:41:46.280 So let's get to your calls.

00:41:48.680 I want to say thank you always.

00:41:50.080 The hotline is 985-664-9503.

00:41:55.560 Ooh, I saw Leon Bridges last night.

00:41:58.880 You familiar with him?

00:42:00.340 Yeah.

00:42:01.360 I saw him.

00:42:02.880 I saw him playing music, man.

00:42:05.820 And that's really a beauty right there of Nashville.

00:42:09.100 That's the beauty of Nashville, man.

00:42:10.780 You are somewhere and a piece of magic shows up.

00:42:15.180 And I mean, if you have not seen Leon Bridges, then I just don't even know what's wrong with you.

00:42:23.680 You might have eight pints of blood in your body.

00:42:27.080 The man is just, I mean, he just, oh.

00:42:31.500 I felt like I went to church.

00:42:33.100 I felt like I got married.

00:42:34.480 I felt like I got buried.

00:42:35.860 I felt like I learned to cook.

00:42:38.720 I felt like I had just bought, you know, five fresh scratchers all at once.

00:42:46.340 I mean, it's just like, it's almost like you opened up your ears and he's just over there just scooping sugar into him.

00:42:54.140 You know?

00:42:55.200 And he got that sound axe, baby. 0.82

00:42:57.040 He got that, he got that freaking loud hammer, baby. 0.92

00:43:02.100 That guetta. 0.94

00:43:04.000 And he's just serving, bro.

00:43:06.400 He's just agave-ing you up.

00:43:08.980 And you just leave out of there filled with sweet, man.

00:43:12.560 And he showed up and played the hits.

00:43:14.400 And I'm talking about Leon Bridges.

00:43:20.040 So, if anything gonna get you over troubled water, you know what it is, baby.

00:43:25.560 Leon Bridges, man.

00:43:28.080 As always, the hotline is 985-664-9503.

00:43:32.880 Let's take a listen right here.

00:43:36.920 Hey, Theo.

00:43:38.400 This is Alex from Kansas.

00:43:44.060 Thank you for calling Alex.

00:43:45.660 And I appreciate it over there in Kansas.

00:43:47.300 And if you say Kansas backwards, this spells, uh, um, Saznac.

00:43:58.660 Let's hear more, brother.

00:43:59.760 Onward.

00:44:00.020 My wife and I have had, like, a lot of animals.

00:44:04.580 We live kind of, I, my wife and I have had, like, a lot of animals.

00:44:08.840 We live kind of on, like, a small farm.

00:44:11.080 And I have an eight-year-old daughter.

00:44:13.460 And, uh, we tell us, like, a lot of animals die.

00:44:16.120 Um, cause we'll have, like, unorthodox stuff.

00:44:20.720 Like, um, chickens.

00:44:23.320 And, like, lizards.

00:44:25.100 And fish.

00:44:25.820 And, like, a lot of, like, outdoor cats.

00:44:28.080 And some, like, chinchillas.

00:44:30.080 And just weird, some weird stuff.

00:44:32.220 And I always think, like, it'll be a great experience for my daughter to, like, raise.

00:44:36.320 Yeah, I'm gonna, I'm just gonna cut the call.

00:44:38.600 Because it sounds like you're calling from a dang, uh, one of those rock tumblers.

00:44:43.080 You know, it sounds like you're calling from the inside of somebody's, um, gastrointestine. 0.98

00:44:48.860 You know, and they've been eating a fucking, you know, they had a half a handful of rough cinnamon. 0.97

00:44:53.560 You can't, I don't know what you're calling. 0.98

00:44:55.020 I mean, you can't, are you calling from the middle of a tectonic plate shift, brother?

00:45:01.360 You gotta get your audio up, daddy.

00:45:04.040 And I'm sorry, I know I'm sounding rude, but.

00:45:07.020 You know, Largish wasn't real nice to me. 0.95

00:45:11.760 And it carries on.

00:45:14.820 So, I'm sorry, I'm kind of, I am kind of being rude.

00:45:17.420 But, look, I'm, people have called about this a lot.

00:45:21.440 You know, and you don't know this about me, Riley.

00:45:23.580 I grew up, I used to raise hamsters when I was growing up.

00:45:26.200 And I've been involved in a lot of small ground game my whole life.

00:45:30.560 Okay, have you ever had any small animals?

00:45:32.740 I have.

00:45:33.260 I had a dog when I was little.

00:45:37.140 Okay, that's great, man.

00:45:38.200 And so, what I'm telling you is this, brother, is that people call in and this man's saying, hey, how do we teach the kids when the animals die?

00:45:45.840 How do we teach them a lesson?

00:45:47.700 How do we use it positively?

00:45:49.280 And this fellow's on a farm.

00:45:51.780 And, yes, when you're on a farm, you get different animals show up.

00:45:55.320 You know, you go out there one time, there's a little toucan out there.

00:45:58.420 And he's putting up, he's putting a little, you know, a little, you know, a little dip in his beak or whatever.

00:46:06.840 You know, you go out in the morning, there'll be a herd of ants out there. 0.98

00:46:09.740 You know, pushing half of a damn jolly rancher down the driveway. 0.97

00:46:15.060 You know, farms, just animals know where they are. 0.99

00:46:17.740 So, if they're in the nature, they'll stop in.

00:46:22.400 A group of sparrows will stop by and attack a yard man.

00:46:26.880 You know, R.I.P. Big Johnny over there, too, in Natchez, Mississippi, and I used to work with him.

00:46:32.480 And he got ganged up on by a whole swaggle of them sparrows.

00:46:35.800 But, a farm is basically like the Hampton Inn, a Mother Nature's Hampton Inn.

00:46:41.100 When animals see a farm, they say, oh, yeah, let's stop here for the night.

00:46:43.940 Even if they're just passing through the area.

00:46:46.980 But, the way I've found to help children learn about death, you get a little animal.

00:46:52.040 And you name it the same name as the grandparents.

00:46:56.640 That's what they did in our family.

00:46:59.120 You know, Pop Pop and Clara.

00:47:02.940 So, then when they die, you practice, you know.

00:47:06.400 You get them that three-month Roborovsky hamster.

00:47:09.920 You know, and most of that market has gone to Russia now.

00:47:12.900 But, at the time, when I was growing up, these were beautiful animals.

00:47:16.500 They were well-kept.

00:47:18.140 You know, they had full amount of blood in them.

00:47:20.960 Now, you get, you know, you get one that's got 60% of blood.

00:47:25.160 It's got a lot of, you know, it's probably 40% saline solution that's been dyed red.

00:47:30.460 You just, they're not the same.

00:47:32.220 A lot of that market's gone to Russia.

00:47:33.620 A lot of hamster.

00:47:34.760 Small ground game market.

00:47:37.580 Anyway, I'm rambling.

00:47:38.480 What I'm saying is you get the animals.

00:47:39.940 You name them the grandparents' names.

00:47:41.920 And, when they pass away, you practice with the children.

00:47:47.560 Oh, let's bury Pop Pop. 0.86

00:47:49.140 Let's bury Clara. 0.99

00:47:51.200 Let's bury Zab. 1.00

00:47:53.080 Let's bury Laddie.

00:47:54.920 Let's bury Jean. 1.00

00:47:56.880 Let's bury Mon Mare. 1.00

00:48:00.100 And, then they get the hang of it.

00:48:01.860 So, then when you, when the actual grandparents die, it's, you know.

00:48:06.580 Now, things can get a little weird because they'll be like, hey, let's flush Grandpa down the toilet.

00:48:12.460 And, that's kind of, you know, that's where you got to plan ahead.

00:48:16.480 And, what do they do in your culture, Riley?

00:48:17.940 What have they done with the animals?

00:48:19.640 Honestly, it depends.

00:48:21.660 Fish would be either down the toilet or in the ocean.

00:48:24.400 Because, you know, I'm in California.

00:48:28.200 So, we have the whole Pacific Ocean next to us.

00:48:32.440 For dogs, I mean, for my dog, at least, we, I have a friend, or my friend's mom.

00:48:39.880 She owned a bio-earn company.

00:48:43.240 So, we had our dog turned into a tree.

00:48:46.340 So, honestly, it just really depends.

00:48:47.300 That's what they're doing now.

00:48:48.880 You hear them?

00:48:49.900 That's what the youngsters are doing.

00:48:51.080 They're having their, the dog turned into a tree.

00:48:57.540 Unbelievable, man.

00:48:59.000 And, does it feel positive to you?

00:49:00.540 Or, does that feel like, you think?

00:49:01.600 It does.

00:49:02.060 It does feel positive until, like, you know, there might be, like, a tornado or something.

00:49:06.920 Well, I mean, obviously, in California, there's no tornadoes.

00:49:09.120 But, like, if there's a tornado here, like, how there was.

00:49:12.900 And, like, if the plant was here, well, I would, like, run with the plant.

00:49:19.360 You would take the plant and leave with it?

00:49:20.880 Oh, yeah.

00:49:21.460 Yeah.

00:49:21.740 Okay, wow.

00:49:22.700 But, now, you're on the hook.

00:49:24.140 Now, you got this tree you got to care about.

00:49:26.320 Right.

00:49:26.720 Now, if it gets ants, the tree gets worms, the tree gets, you know.

00:49:31.240 You know, now, at the middle of the night, somebody comes out there, you're throwing a Frisbee against the tree.

00:49:35.400 You know, it's like, it's not gonna.

00:49:37.080 It just, things are supposed to have a life path.

00:49:44.160 Right.

00:49:45.000 And, now, we're just continuing it on.

00:49:48.880 But, that's California. 0.69

00:49:50.220 Hey, we'll put a dead dog in a tree, you know.

00:49:52.700 That's the, you know, that's that next.

00:49:54.160 They just keep you on the hook.

00:49:57.840 Now, you know, now, every month, for an extra $30, they'll dump a frickin', you know, they'll open a can of cat food or something and put it, set it on the branch or something.

00:50:09.620 So, it just never ends.

00:50:12.640 It just never ends, man.

00:50:14.280 But, that's how you learn about death.

00:50:19.140 And, you mentioned they had a storm here.

00:50:20.860 They had a tornado that came here?

00:50:22.500 Correct.

00:50:23.220 Okay.

00:50:24.500 And, people, and what, how rough was it?

00:50:29.440 It, it did a lot of damage, for sure.

00:50:31.860 It did, I think, I want to say a billion, two billion dollars worth of damage.

00:50:36.760 Dang, really?

00:50:37.600 Yeah, it was a lot.

00:50:38.620 It tore right through Middle Tennessee.

00:50:40.200 It went from, from the middle of Nashville all the way over to Hermitage.

00:50:46.680 Oh, wow.

00:50:47.260 I didn't know it was that bad.

00:50:48.340 Oh, it was terrible.

00:50:48.920 I know a soup plant, I know it, it definitely, it took down a dang soup plantation over there in Hendersonville. 0.59

00:50:53.200 Yeah.

00:50:53.860 And, that broke a lot of hearts.

00:50:55.580 But, one thing that gets me is, Mother Nature is going to do what she's going to do.

00:51:03.940 And, it's how we react to it.

00:51:05.740 You know, and, everybody also wants to play a victim a lot of times with Mother Nature.

00:51:11.760 Oh, Mother, no. 0.79

00:51:13.220 Oh.

00:51:14.300 It's so hot.

00:51:16.000 Well, you live in the, you live on Earth.

00:51:19.700 You know?

00:51:21.440 There's sun in the air.

00:51:22.900 You can't be shocked that there's warm, that there's warm coming out of it.

00:51:27.400 You know, you can't be shocked if you, if you live on a glacier, that your feet get cold.

00:51:36.120 You got, you got, you know, and everybody wants to be, oh, you know, the tornado, and, you know, we were about 60 miles from it, and the power went out.

00:51:47.180 We lost power, some lady kept telling me.

00:51:50.680 That ain't, look, get a candle, boo. 0.98

00:51:52.760 You didn't, losing power, losing power is not, your arms don't work.

00:51:59.220 That's losing power.

00:52:01.420 You know, when you can't hug anybody, you just got to rub your neck against them to let them know you care.

00:52:07.000 That's losing power.

00:52:10.460 Okay?

00:52:11.620 Or, your legs don't work. 0.99

00:52:13.720 And, you got to elbow crawl to the door to get a damn Amazon box, you know? 0.99

00:52:20.960 That's losing power. 0.99

00:52:23.460 You know, electricity, you light a candle.

00:52:29.160 And, you can change all that up.

00:52:31.300 But, that is how you, you name the pets after the grandparents, that's how it works.

00:52:35.780 Or, you know what, name the pets Largish, bruh.

00:52:39.120 Because, she's got something coming, I'll tell you that.

00:52:45.920 Let's go to, uh, let's go to another call right here.

00:52:51.260 Here we go.

00:52:52.760 Hey, Theo.

00:52:55.040 It's your boy, future Army helicopter pilot, Mikey.

00:52:58.300 What's up, Mikey?

00:53:00.180 And, thank you for calling, and good luck out there in that military, bruh. 0.96

00:53:03.460 It's my first year away from home, and I'm spending all this motherfucking dorm money on it. 0.97

00:53:07.680 Ugh. 0.98

00:53:07.960 And, why did he have to curse, you think, right there, Riley Mao?

00:53:12.820 Who knows, it's just how, how he talks.

00:53:15.560 Yeah.

00:53:15.920 Okay, you're right, you're right.

00:53:19.460 You're right.

00:53:19.980 Onward.

00:53:20.880 On a virtual education from my ROTC.

00:53:23.900 Okay, you take an ROTC virtually.

00:53:26.580 Okay, onward.

00:53:27.440 Got us doing sweat activities on the Zoom call, son.

00:53:32.000 Anyways, they got these college girl hitters in the Zoom call, and I want some advice on catching their attention with these opposite sex hitters, but do the online calls. 1.00

00:53:43.280 Mm-hmm.

00:53:43.580 Sometimes I make them laugh by mirroring what they do on the call, and that's really all I've done so far.

00:53:50.080 Any advice on catching the attention of these fine ladies? 1.00

00:53:55.540 Gang, gang, don't do coke. 0.68

00:53:57.540 Onward.

00:53:58.540 Gang, brother.

00:54:00.100 Do you do cocaine, Riley?

00:54:01.360 I don't.

00:54:02.320 All right, so what this man is asking about is being on Zoom and flirting with women.

00:54:07.880 And I guess there's something to be said for having some Zoom game.

00:54:11.360 You know, I think one thing you can do, I love the idea of mirroring what the lady is doing. 0.99

00:54:17.380 That's like a cute way of flirting, kind of.

00:54:19.680 You know, she drinks out of something, you drink out of something.

00:54:22.960 You know, she puts on a, you know, do a lipstick, you do a lipstick. 0.99

00:54:27.880 You know, she, you know, pets an animal or something, you pet an animal.

00:54:35.000 I really like that.

00:54:36.260 But I also think you need to, you want to have stuff in the atmosphere that shows a woman how you feel. 0.65

00:54:42.520 You want to set something nice out there.

00:54:45.380 Get you a little plant.

00:54:46.520 Get you a little bonsai out there.

00:54:48.660 A little cactus, man.

00:54:51.040 You know, set a nice, some shoes or something in the back.

00:54:53.860 Something nice.

00:54:54.580 You know, you want to have, you just want to have a, you want to have nice things.

00:55:01.740 You know, if you're eating something, make sure it's something classy.

00:55:06.460 You know, get a plant and even, you could do gardening while you're on the call.

00:55:10.540 Do a, start doing a little garden.

00:55:12.260 You know, and do something sexual.

00:55:15.980 Throw a little, you know, plant a couple Viagras.

00:55:18.840 Plant a couple Blue Chews.

00:55:20.300 Throw out the vibe.

00:55:21.180 Say, hey, you know, I'm ready to grow a little root for you, mommy. 0.87

00:55:27.260 You know, you got to, you got to, you know, you got to plan ahead a little bit.

00:55:34.560 You know, leave things out that are good.

00:55:38.000 Leave things out that she'll see on the Zoom.

00:55:41.320 Things that, you know, some fresh bread, a little freaking, some remotes.

00:55:46.140 You know, different remote controllers.

00:55:48.100 Let her know you got a little bit of money.

00:55:51.460 You know, do that kind of thing.

00:55:53.100 It's, gentleman it up.

00:55:56.180 Hang a tuxedo in the distance.

00:55:58.720 You know, put on some James Bond or something in the background.

00:56:02.340 You know, get a picture of, download a picture of rich parents.

00:56:06.200 Google rich parents on the internet.

00:56:09.260 That print it out.

00:56:10.800 Hang it up.

00:56:13.300 Plan ahead.

00:56:14.800 So that's easy, brother.

00:56:16.520 And you're welcome for that.

00:56:19.560 All right.

00:56:20.180 I do want to let you know that today's episode is brought to you by Ray Kahn.

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01:01:03.080 You can do it.

01:01:04.060 I know you can.

01:01:04.860 What else is going on?

01:01:08.140 Oh, in the news, I saw this.

01:01:13.600 That they had a gender reveal party and they lit up the dang forest in California. 0.97

01:01:21.960 A couple people trying to beat open a, you know, somebody trying to beat open a flaming armoire with a golf club just so they can let you know what the gender of their son is.

01:01:39.760 And California said, we ain't having any of it.

01:01:43.320 And now there's a forest fire.

01:01:44.900 Over 7,000 acres of male and female forest have been burnt to the ground.

01:01:54.660 That's, that's, look man, they don't, you gotta, California is not a, they don't, nobody has a gender. 0.62

01:02:00.920 There's no more gender there. 0.99

01:02:02.320 They ain't doing gender. 0.75

01:02:05.620 They ain't doing gender. 0.75

01:02:08.520 You try to reveal anything's gender, fire. 0.70

01:02:12.440 That's the new rule there.

01:02:14.900 Oh, you want to see this?

01:02:17.320 You want to see it, you know, see if the baby gots a titty or something. 0.99

01:02:20.920 They shooting open a damn water balloon with a cannon. 0.99

01:02:24.600 Do the baby gots a titty or wiener or whatever. 1.00

01:02:27.020 Bam, fire. 0.95

01:02:31.580 The gender reveals they can't handle it. 1.00

01:02:35.740 You know, when I was young, Riley Mao, when I was young, you would look, you know, you got to be five or six years old.

01:02:41.220 You'd sneak off and look in your pants and see what you were.

01:02:45.900 I remember not, I didn't know what I was, you know.

01:02:48.960 I remember one time, I'm over at my friend's house.

01:02:52.200 He's a little bit kind of, he was kind of fat, a little kind of chubby guy.

01:02:55.140 And he was taking a break.

01:02:56.400 He was always doing that.

01:02:58.000 You know, we'd play any game.

01:02:59.220 And we'd be 10 seconds into the game and he would turn red enough to take a break.

01:03:03.440 So I snuck off behind his house over by the, kind of by the firewood, looked in my pants and I was a man.

01:03:10.000 There wasn't no party.

01:03:14.200 There wasn't no cake after.

01:03:15.380 There wasn't no petty fours.

01:03:17.720 You know, no balloons, no BS.

01:03:19.680 But there wasn't any fire. 0.97

01:03:24.100 You know, you youngsters, you want everybody, you know, you know, you got a wean or you want everybody to have a damn, you know, slice of homemade pie or something. 0.83

01:03:34.320 Um, so, just different, man. 0.92

01:03:41.120 It's just different.

01:03:43.680 What else have I been seeing a lot of?

01:03:45.840 Um, dude, you know what I was thinking?

01:03:48.580 A lot of these BLM rallies, it's all white people. 0.97

01:03:52.660 That's how lame they've gotten. 0.99

01:03:55.480 Black people aren't even showing up to them anymore. 1.00

01:03:58.720 Could you imagine if a black guy showed up to a BLM rally? 0.99

01:04:01.860 He would be like, this has gotten bad. 0.97

01:04:04.320 This has gotten, I just can't even imagine.

01:04:12.560 I'll say this, um, there's people fighting in the parks and stuff and you keep seeing it.

01:04:18.800 This is what is, it's our renaissance fair.

01:04:22.340 You know, it, the world has gotten a little more violent.

01:04:27.460 They got the UFC now.

01:04:29.380 You can watch people beat each other into unconsciousness.

01:04:33.460 They're selling you tires while somebody is losing their ability to recognize their family members.

01:04:49.100 That's, that's why a lot of protesting, I think you get these Antifa, you get these Proud Boys, you know, you get these Wildcats out there.

01:04:57.500 That's the new renaissance fair.

01:04:59.400 Get a turkey leg, go to the park, and watch them LARP it out.

01:05:07.840 That's all it is.

01:05:09.840 That's all it is.

01:05:14.300 That's all it is.

01:05:15.440 Let's take a couple more calls that came in.

01:05:18.520 Um, here we go.

01:05:19.820 What's up, Theo?

01:05:20.960 It's your boy Jim from Jacksonville.

01:05:23.520 What's up, Jim?

01:05:25.500 And Jim can be short for a lot of different names, bro.

01:05:28.380 So, Jimothy, um, let's hear more.

01:05:35.600 I was wondering if you had any thoughts on this WAP.

01:05:38.600 Seems like WAP's hot in the streets right now.

01:05:41.740 I was wondering if you had any thoughts or comments on it.

01:05:44.440 That WAP. 1.00

01:05:45.300 Worship and praise, my brother.

01:05:46.840 Praise the Lord.

01:05:48.000 Amen, baby.

01:05:48.940 PTL, brother.

01:05:49.620 I feel you.

01:05:50.100 And a lot of people are talking, you know, they have a lot of, uh, risque music out there.

01:05:56.600 You know, and they got the new song WAP, and it sounds for, it stands for wet, private parts, basically. 0.99

01:06:02.460 Female crotch. 1.00

01:06:04.320 For me, I don't, I don't listen to it. 0.99

01:06:07.480 I just don't, you know, I just don't, I think it's more of a girl's song.

01:06:15.200 You know, I just don't listen to it, man.

01:06:18.440 I don't listen.

01:06:19.240 When I was young, WAP was also a racial slur, I think, even.

01:06:23.460 You know, and, so I'm not, if I go around yelling WAP, you know, I just don't want to get involved in any, you know, 1.00

01:06:30.720 I don't want my grandfather to get excited and run and grab a weapon. 0.99

01:06:33.920 You know, that kind of shit. 1.00

01:06:36.140 So, I don't listen to it, brother. 1.00

01:06:38.800 Jim from Jacksonville, I appreciate you calling.

01:06:40.900 I don't, you know, I just don't need to be thinking about it. 0.98

01:06:45.220 Because I have enough visions in my head of female body crotch, titty, shoulder area, you know, neck, back, leg, nice leg. 1.00

01:06:58.620 You know, and I'm trying to keep, I just, and it's okay to have them, I just don't want to be, you know, touching myself. 0.98

01:07:09.080 So, that's why I'm trying not to, I don't need to be driving around as an adult man listening to someone yelling about their crotch being wet.

01:07:24.440 I don't, I don't, I don't need that. 0.87

01:07:31.980 Okay, great man, onward.

01:07:33.280 Let's take one more call here that we got, that we got here.

01:07:37.200 Let's hear it.

01:07:38.140 Yo, what's up, Theo?

01:07:41.440 This is Nick from, uh, just outside of Baltimore in Maryland, the safe side.

01:07:47.000 But, uh, this past weekend, my girlfriend and I, we took a trip to Lancaster, or Lancaster, Pennsylvania, you know, out there in Amish country.

01:07:57.360 And we saw this girl.

01:07:59.120 Yeah, yeah, Lancaster.

01:08:00.200 On, like, this scooter, slash bike that didn't have wheels, and she was moving faster than a horse.

01:08:09.960 Literally faster than a horse.

01:08:11.540 I thought, man, what, what are we missing out on?

01:08:14.840 What if the Amish were in the Olympics?

01:08:18.440 Think about that.

01:08:20.260 I was like, man, I know you're always thinking about the next, uh, movie that you and your podcast buddies could do.

01:08:26.800 You talked about wrestling or something like that, but I want you guys to do the Amish Olympics.

01:08:33.600 Anyhow, man.

01:08:34.920 The Amish Olympics, huh?

01:08:36.180 And this, Riley, this is a fella calling this guy's obviously under the influence of drugs, marijuana.

01:08:42.260 You know, this guy's driving through Pennsylvania.

01:08:45.800 He has his girlfriend, and they are watching a child and a horse.

01:08:52.100 They're watching a child on a scooter pass a horse.

01:08:54.580 You know, the Amish were the original aliens. 1.00

01:08:57.600 You know, before they went to aliens, oh, space, there's people in space, you know, being crazy, doing this kind of stuff, and, you know, lasers, all of that.

01:09:10.200 They had the Amish.

01:09:11.960 That was the original alien.

01:09:14.620 Like, hey, let's go watch a guy hang laundry.

01:09:17.900 People were like, nah, uh, let's go watch a guy make his own milk or milk his wife. 0.99

01:09:26.000 Like, no, you're kidding.

01:09:28.900 Yeah.

01:09:29.060 And then you'd go, and you'd see it.

01:09:35.100 You'd just, you know, you'd be in the woods.

01:09:37.700 It'd be a couple of men. 0.97

01:09:42.860 And that's a police, I guess.

01:09:44.400 I don't know.

01:09:44.900 If you see the studio here, it's, I mean, we have a limited, it is, learn as we go.

01:09:54.020 It's been a learning experience, man.

01:09:55.640 It's been a little bit of a trying time.

01:09:57.380 But what I'm telling this guy, Amish Olympics, let's do it.

01:10:00.540 I'm ready to see everybody, I'm ready to see everybody in it.

01:10:05.300 And I want to know where the black Amish are.

01:10:09.040 Where are the black Amish? 1.00

01:10:11.060 You want to get out there? 0.97

01:10:12.380 You want to do something different?

01:10:16.380 Find these people.

01:10:19.480 Find these people and report them.

01:10:26.400 All right, man.

01:10:27.420 Let's take one more call.

01:10:28.380 This has been a wild episode.

01:10:29.660 It's been, you know, we're getting through this.

01:10:32.360 That's what this is called, I think.

01:10:34.120 Getting through this.

01:10:35.920 I want to say, I want to thank everybody for their patience.

01:10:41.000 As we, you know, this episode, we got it out a little bit late this week.

01:10:45.340 But we, you know, we had to make sure that we're figuring things out.

01:10:49.520 There's not all, you know, we're missing, you get over to the different areas of the country.

01:10:53.080 They don't have the same people.

01:10:54.160 You don't have the same, you know, you can't just, you know, kidnap somebody and next thing you know, they know how to help produce a podcast or edit video.

01:11:04.420 You know, you know, it's just not the same, it's not the same types of people.

01:11:13.580 So it takes some, you got to look through the woods a little.

01:11:16.120 You got to find your black Amish, you know. 1.00

01:11:22.400 You got to find that rare person, that alien, that unique, that largish.

01:11:29.480 And let's take one more call that came in here.

01:11:38.000 Here we go.

01:11:38.660 Yo, Theo, this is Jesse, man.

01:11:41.820 You just gave me a call this afternoon and, you know.

01:11:46.000 What's up, Jesse?

01:11:48.240 Yeah, I remember, man.

01:11:49.380 This is last week, but I do remember, bro.

01:11:51.780 I hope you're doing well, man.

01:11:53.500 And, yeah, thanks for chatting with me, Onward.

01:11:57.520 I've been thinking about it while I just got out of work.

01:12:00.360 And I've been thinking about it.

01:12:01.660 And, like, you know, I feel bad because, like, you know, I felt like I was just, you know, maybe I'm just overthinking.

01:12:09.020 But I feel like I was discrediting your feelings because I was, like, in the, you know, starstruck kind of moment of, you know, you giving me a call or whatever.

01:12:19.940 And, like, you know, you were expressing to me some things you were going through.

01:12:23.600 And, like, you know, looking back on it, I was kind of, like, dismissive of it, I think.

01:12:28.340 And, you know, maybe I'm just overthinking.

01:12:30.200 That's what I do.

01:12:30.860 But I just wanted to express that to you and how grateful I am that you actually did reach out, man, because it did help me today.

01:12:40.560 I was going through a lot today.

01:12:41.880 And I've been going through a lot lately.

01:12:43.380 And, you know, I try to put on a mask of everything's great and golden.

01:12:47.480 But, you know, there's just life's going on and stuff, you know.

01:12:50.460 So we can get through anything together, you know what I mean?

01:12:53.540 We do together what I can't do alone, you know.

01:12:55.960 So, you know, my celebration's coming up here September 26th on the Zoom platform.

01:13:01.960 And I'm pretty excited for that, dude.

01:13:05.740 Thanks again for calling, man.

01:13:07.120 Keep up the good work and, you know, keep that gratitude, man.

01:13:10.260 I'm grateful for you every day, dude.

01:13:11.880 Love you.

01:13:12.320 Thanks, man.

01:13:14.960 That's a nice message, man.

01:13:17.180 That's a really nice message.

01:13:20.500 Yeah, I don't think that you were rude, man.

01:13:23.160 You know, and I didn't mean to surprise you just with the call.

01:13:28.480 But I'm glad that we got to chat a little.

01:13:33.200 And, yeah, I overthink everything, man.

01:13:36.220 I overthink everything.

01:13:38.940 Like, dang.

01:13:41.280 Like, dude, I'll be like, dang, man.

01:13:45.220 Was that too weird in that meeting?

01:13:47.280 Like, did I stay?

01:13:48.160 Sometimes I'll be talking.

01:13:49.080 I'll be listening.

01:13:50.120 In a conversation, I'll be like, am I looking at this person for too long?

01:13:54.000 Like, do I blink right now?

01:13:55.840 Do I, what do I do?

01:13:58.080 Touch my face?

01:13:59.340 Oh, I wish I had some gum.

01:14:01.520 And some of them I'll keep a little, you know, a baby snicker or a jolly rancher in my pocket so I can open it up.

01:14:08.560 You know, if I start to, about eight seconds into just staring somebody in the eyes, it's like, okay, blink.

01:14:14.580 Have a JR.

01:14:16.780 You know, break up the momentum.

01:14:18.180 But we do it together, man.

01:14:21.580 We do everything together.

01:14:23.020 You know, and I appreciate your call back.

01:14:24.660 And just, man, you're golden in my book.

01:14:27.300 And just the fact that you thought to give me a call and just say, hey, man, it means a lot.

01:14:31.060 You know, and just, and that you cared how I was thinking or that, you know, it's, you know, we're here on earth and this is the gift is each other.

01:14:41.380 You know, the gift is each other.

01:14:42.980 And it's been a, this has been a rough time for a lot of people.

01:14:47.740 You know, a lot of, you know, we get addicted to the news and addicted to the, watching the, the drama.

01:14:56.220 And, and I was thinking the past week, I've been thinking, man, people over politics, I've been thinking.

01:15:02.620 You know, I care about people, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care about politics.

01:15:10.200 I don't, it doesn't, I, it just, it's too much of an argumentative space.

01:15:14.480 There's no, it's all, it all feels like a dirty show.

01:15:22.140 You know, I, so what can we affect, what can we be a part of that feels good is, I feel like is each other.

01:15:32.620 You know, I'm tired, I don't need all the extracurriculars.

01:15:38.540 You know, I'm just going to show up and just feed the ducks, man.

01:15:44.080 You know, if large-ish wants to be a, you know, if she wants to be a large-ish, that's fine. 1.00

01:15:52.920 I'll be a small, I'm just going to try and be a small-ish, man.

01:15:55.860 You know, I'm going to check in with people that I love, and people that I, that I know care about me.

01:16:05.280 I'm just going to try to keep it going.

01:16:07.240 But for me, man, I just, I don't want to be in the, I don't want to be in that hurricane, man.

01:16:15.440 It just, I, I just noticed more, I don't know, man.

01:16:19.880 I'm not trying to preach at you, I just, you know, when I look back on the past few months,

01:16:25.240 and I just feel like, oh, the, just all the stuff and the opinion, the stuff online and the opinions I get,

01:16:34.060 and then I get angry at this person, and then it's like, man, I'm angry.

01:16:37.440 I'm getting upset with people and opinions and stuff, people that I care about.

01:16:44.460 You know, what's real here?

01:16:45.940 So, I don't know.

01:16:54.880 I don't know what I'm talking about. 0.85

01:16:58.200 But, I'm just glad I'm not a dang pedophile.

01:17:01.500 I'm glad I'm not, you know, there's things to be grateful for.

01:17:06.100 And, we got each other, and we're trying something new.

01:17:13.200 And, I'm glad I don't have to try it alone, man.

01:17:15.760 Dude, two days ago, I'm sitting in here, and I'm like, man, I'm never going to get this studio put together.

01:17:20.640 I'm not going to be able to figure it out.

01:17:25.480 You know, three days ago, I was just bummed, man.

01:17:28.240 And, now, I'm sitting here, you know, I'm sitting here, we got a place, they got fresh paint.

01:17:40.340 You know, we got another human here.

01:17:45.300 You know, sitting here working with, you know, people from different cultures, different worlds.

01:17:55.060 And, it's okay.

01:17:56.340 You know, we just keep going, man.

01:17:59.520 We keep going onward.

01:18:01.020 I think that's it.

01:18:04.800 Riley, Mau, anything else you need to say, man?

01:18:07.500 No, I think this was a, this was great.

01:18:10.320 I loved being here.

01:18:11.700 Great to be here.

01:18:13.160 I like your attitude, brother.

01:18:15.140 I like your attitude, man.

01:18:18.940 Alright, let's roll out on some shine.

01:18:21.860 The same way we rolled in, man.

01:18:24.540 People say, I'm tired of hearing it.

01:18:25.680 That's, sometimes I'm tired of hearing it.

01:18:28.140 But, it's keeping me going.

01:18:30.420 You know, I am excited about getting, uh,

01:18:33.240 I'm excited about getting,

01:18:38.140 um, some musicians,

01:18:41.420 different musicians,

01:18:42.560 and introducing their music through the podcast.

01:18:44.520 You know, different Nashville musicians, and just trying to focus on that again, getting some new music,

01:18:51.140 and giving, you know, young artists a platform, and, you know, I'm excited about that.

01:18:57.040 And, um, you know, and it's, sometimes we can't even be in the results of things.

01:19:03.720 You know, we had, uh, you know, with the last episode, solo episode, we try to reach out to some of the different single mothers, and, and say hey to them.

01:19:12.300 And we're gonna, you know, it's taking a little bit, but we're gonna send them some cards, and do, you know, send a little gift to help out with just some of them being a part of doing fun stuff with their kids.

01:19:22.140 And, you know, and, uh, and we got to some feet, just kick back from it.

01:19:30.440 About, you know, one of the moms have an OnlyFans account. 0.99

01:19:34.120 You know, and it just, uh,

01:19:37.200 you know, you just do what you can.

01:19:42.720 You know, and it's, even when you try to do something good,

01:19:46.180 it's not, it don't, or whatever, it just,

01:19:49.900 you know, it,

01:19:51.680 it's not always gonna be perceived that way.

01:19:55.760 Oh, well.

01:19:57.700 You know?

01:19:59.940 It just, you just try.

01:20:01.680 You just try, and you go again,

01:20:03.660 and you do something, you just do what you can.

01:20:07.680 You know?

01:20:11.120 You just do what you can.

01:20:15.140 Um,

01:20:16.660 I don't know why I'm not,

01:20:17.520 I don't know why I'm really sharing that with you guys, but,

01:20:19.880 it just,

01:20:21.560 I don't know,

01:20:22.960 it just, you do what you can.

01:20:26.900 You, you, you,

01:20:28.020 there's no,

01:20:28.680 I don't even know if you,

01:20:29.360 if you ever win.

01:20:31.860 You just do what you can.

01:20:33.160 Everybody's just trying to survive.

01:20:36.760 I really believe that.

01:20:37.800 Everybody's just trying to survive.

01:20:38.920 And,

01:20:39.280 and, uh,

01:20:41.000 and we do what we can, man.

01:20:42.640 But I'm glad to be here today with you.

01:20:44.860 And, um,

01:20:45.980 and I appreciate you being supportive of this podcast as we,

01:20:48.780 as we expand and get this Central East location.

01:20:51.300 And we'll still be going back to LA.

01:20:53.720 We're trying things out.

01:20:55.260 We're trying something new.

01:20:57.860 And,

01:20:58.260 and I'm trying to stay hopeful, man.

01:21:01.260 And I'm not doing it alone.

01:21:02.600 Thank you,

01:21:02.900 Raleigh Mao,

01:21:03.480 for being in here today.

01:21:06.100 And, um,

01:21:07.500 being a true Japanese Hawaiian.

01:21:09.120 Is that your culture?

01:21:10.040 Correct.

01:21:10.780 Them J-Haws, man. 0.97

01:21:11.780 Beautiful people.

01:21:13.640 And, uh,

01:21:15.140 and thank you,

01:21:15.780 producer Nick Davis,

01:21:16.680 who flew over here

01:21:17.800 with his girlfriend

01:21:19.600 and they came and helped out and,

01:21:22.420 you know,

01:21:23.300 it takes a village, huh?

01:21:25.180 Right.

01:21:26.180 Right.

01:21:26.660 Exactly.

01:21:27.500 You know,

01:21:27.840 we can't do things alone,

01:21:28.940 can we?

01:21:30.100 Not at all.

01:21:30.940 You always need someone to help.

01:21:32.820 Yeah.

01:21:33.680 It's true, man.

01:21:34.480 Sometimes I want to do things just alone.

01:21:36.100 I get,

01:21:36.420 I just get stuck that way,

01:21:37.700 you know?

01:21:38.460 Right.

01:21:38.880 Same.

01:21:39.620 Do you really?

01:21:40.420 Mm-hmm.

01:21:41.440 But then whenever I do decide,

01:21:43.480 okay,

01:21:43.660 I'm going to do it with somebody else,

01:21:45.080 I feel,

01:21:45.500 end up feeling better.

01:21:46.720 Right.

01:21:47.040 It's a lot easier with someone else,

01:21:48.680 whether you just need them,

01:21:50.480 whether you need.

01:21:53.700 Yeah.

01:21:55.900 That's it, man.

01:21:57.280 I'm glad you said that.

01:21:58.600 All right.

01:21:58.840 You guys be good to yourselves, man.

01:22:01.400 You deserve it.

01:22:02.520 And we'll see you guys next time.

01:22:03.880 Okay.

01:22:04.040 Okay.

01:22:17.040 I'm just sitting on your front porch,

01:22:24.640 wondering how could I be so far from my home.

01:22:30.000 And my mind is somewhere else,

01:22:35.320 but when I find it,

01:22:37.100 I'll patch up where it's been blown.

01:22:40.640 Now I'm just floating on the breeze and I feel I'm falling like these leaves.

01:22:49.860 I must be cornerstone.

01:22:55.200 Oh,

01:22:55.960 but when I reach that ground,

01:22:57.880 I'll share this peace of mind.

01:22:59.920 And I found I can feel it in my bones,

01:23:04.080 but it's going to take a little time for me to set that parking brake and let myself on wire.

01:23:16.360 Shine that light on me.

01:23:22.600 I'll sit and tell you my stories.

01:23:27.960 Shine on me.

01:23:32.320 And I will find a song.

01:23:35.560 I will sing it just for you.

01:23:42.840 And I've been moving way too fast.

01:23:46.220 On the runaway train with a heavy load of my past.

01:23:53.780 And these roads that I've been riding on,

01:23:56.680 They're worn so thin that they're damn near gone.

01:23:59.520 I guess now they just weren't built to last.

01:24:04.160 Yeah,

01:24:04.700 I'm gonna try

01:24:05.940 To make sense of what I can

01:24:09.780 Of where I'm going

01:24:11.680 Oh,

01:24:12.960 And where I'll be

01:24:14.320 Shine that light on me.

01:24:21.280 I'll sit and tell you my story.

01:24:26.320 Shine on me.

01:24:29.360 And I'll sit and tell you my stories.

01:24:31.360 Shine that light on me.

01:24:36.360 And I'll sit and tell you my stories.

01:24:41.360 Shine that light on me.

01:24:42.360 I'll sit and tell you my stories.

01:24:43.360 Shine that light on me.

01:24:48.360 And I will find a song.

01:24:50.360 I will sing it just for you.

01:24:52.360 Shine that light on me.

01:24:53.360 Shine that light on me.

01:24:54.360 I will feel my stories.

01:24:59.600 Shine on me.

01:25:01.360 And I will find a song.

01:25:04.360 And I will sing it just for you.

01:25:14.360 Shine that light on me.

01:25:18.360 Oh, yeah.

01:25:24.280 Oh yeah, oh yeah

01:25:28.760 Shine, shine on me

01:25:34.500 Shine, shine on me

01:25:41.800 Shine, shine on me

01:25:54.280 Shine, shine on me

01:25:57.280 Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite

01:26:00.700 and welcome to Kite Club

01:26:01.980 a podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts on things like

01:26:04.940 current events, stand-up stories

01:26:06.860 and seven ways to pleasure your partner

01:26:09.200 The answer may shock you

01:26:11.100 Sometimes I'll interview my friends

01:26:13.120 Sometimes I won't

01:26:14.440 And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head

01:26:17.940 You have three new voice messages

01:26:20.860 A lot of people are talking about Kite Club

01:26:23.820 I've been talking about Kite Club for so long

01:26:26.620 Longer than anybody else

01:26:28.260 So great

01:26:29.040 Hi, sweetheart

01:26:30.820 Here's the deal

01:26:32.100 Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club 1.00

01:26:34.540 is a dodgy bloody wanker 1.00

01:26:36.340 Jermaine 1.00

01:26:37.300 I'll take a quarter pounder with cheese

01:26:40.580 and a McFlurry

01:26:41.620 Sorry sir, but our ice cream machine is broken

01:26:43.460 I think Tom Hanks just butt-dialed me

01:26:48.420 Anyway, first rule of Kite Club is

01:26:50.840 tell everyone about Kite Club

01:26:52.540 Second rule of Kite Club is

01:26:54.480 tell everyone about Kite Club

01:26:56.740 Third rule

01:26:57.500 Like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts

01:27:00.120 or watch us on YouTube, yeah?

01:27:02.740 And yes, don't worry

01:27:03.780 My Brad Pitt impression will get better

01:27:05.840 to find out

01:27:08.600 If you have time to watch us then

01:27:09.180 I'll be right back ready

01:27:10.280 If I

01:27:21.680 If I

01:27:23.080 If I

This Past Weekend with Theo Von - September 08, 2020

E295 Nashville

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