Ali Dawah - IS MARITAL RAPE ALLOWED IN ISLAM？

00:00:00.000 she went further than that she said if i if it wasn't for the fear of god i would have spat in

00:00:03.780 his face can you imagine and you're telling us that this is a man's religion yeah and she's

00:00:08.040 going to the prophet of god and saying i would have spat at my husband's face like big flag

00:00:13.720 no no no no you know what does the prophet say does the prophet stop her yes how dare you nothing

00:00:18.620 does it stop her no no no he must have insulted her no no no hellfire hellfire no no nothing like

00:00:23.480 that what what did he say he gave her what she wanted really sex happening without the person's

00:00:28.580 consent are you saying that that is wrong yes i'm saying that that is hold on a second bro hold

00:00:32.320 on a second there was advocate you as a muslim man with this hair and beard you know a macho man

00:00:37.660 your hadith the prophet peace be upon him says yeah that if a man tells his wife to come for intimacy

00:00:44.420 and she says no or she refuses to the angels curse her let's see how you get out of this one now

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00:01:02.600 salam10 for 10% of their products assalamualaikum warahmatullahi barakatuh brothers and sisters

00:01:08.200 and dear friends hope you guys are well inshaAllah welcome to this video before we start we want to

00:01:11.080 praise Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala the most merciful the most trust or praises glory and gratitude

00:01:14.060 belong to him this was not going to be a reaction video but we came across the video and we thought

00:01:18.300 you know we might as well react to it because this is what people like listening to let's get straight

00:01:21.400 into it so this is about marital rape so this new phenomena this new popularized idea

00:01:26.440 that rape can occur in a marriage is something that we're going to be reacting to so we're going

00:01:31.840 to get straight into it there's a video and this is actually quite brutal because in here in this

00:01:35.160 very specific video the woman actually ends up killing the man let's find out why you ready

00:01:56.440 okay let's get straight to the point no time wasting this was a very brutal disturbing case now the

00:02:24.560 first thing to mention is forced marriage which is not permissible in some and forcing someone to get

00:02:29.880 married on top of that if i'm if i didn't see that wrong was it saying that he got her cousins to rape

00:02:34.960 her no i think he he raped her whilst they watched so he called the cousins to hold it down or what

00:02:41.060 something like that that's again haram because you know you're showing your wife's aura number one

00:02:44.960 oh there's many things about that there's a there's many things that are haram about that but i think

00:02:50.240 with this discourse we have to start off with robust definitions okay because that's what we have you

00:02:55.160 here in the feminist movement the second wave uh feminist movement there has been some really

00:03:01.840 radical definitions of what constitutes rape by the way for example mckinnon katherine mckinnon

00:03:07.960 famously actually said that even if the woman consents and says yes that it can still be uh rape

00:03:17.420 and i i believe just from listening to jermaine greer in recent times as well this trivialization of

00:03:25.220 stranger rape uh because what it is is that when the definitions become so closely knit to

00:03:33.700 uh normal intercourse then it trivializes in my opinion you know especially if mckinnon is saying

00:03:41.000 that even if the person says yes so if the woman is consenting it's still rape i mean these kind of

00:03:46.760 what about the man what if the man's consenting okay good point right uh but the point is these are

00:03:51.720 the kind of ridiculous definitions unacceptable definitions which we need to kind of eliminate

00:03:56.260 from but we need to explain that they are part of the discourse and have been part of the discourse

00:04:00.480 but when we're talking about rape i think that's why i said let's start with robust definitions

00:04:04.980 when we're talking about we're talking about without the person's consent we're talking about

00:04:11.220 sex happening without the person's consent are you saying that that is wrong yes i'm saying that

00:04:15.820 that is hold on a second bro hold on a second let's be there was advocate you know you you as a muslim

00:04:19.380 man with this hair and beard you know a macho man uh your hadith the prophet peace be upon him says

00:04:24.400 yeah that if a man tells his wife to come for intimacy and she says no or she refuses to the

00:04:32.440 angels curse her let's see how you get out of this one now brother let's see how brave you are now

00:04:35.620 the angels will curse her but the hadith also says that if he bet one if he sleeps over and he's very

00:04:42.720 angry so it's obviously what's the anger caused by the anger is caused by his not getting his way or

00:04:49.180 not having sex with the woman because if if the if if if the hadith was instructing him to have

00:04:54.660 uh sex then it would would tell him it wouldn't be there'd be nothing for him to be angry about he'd

00:04:59.080 be getting his way good point so that's so let's get so that's self-defeating the very hadith actually

00:05:03.660 um refutes the contention that islam is some kind of condoning marital rape because the hadith

00:05:10.640 itself says that the angels will curse her yeah um so what that should it doesn't say if the hadith said

00:05:16.280 you ask your wife to come to the bed she doesn't you better grab her by the head or you rape her

00:05:20.040 don't forget this is not saying that this is talking about somebody who's not offering their

00:05:23.680 spouse yeah uh sexual assurity right and um and this is what marriage is all about marriage is about

00:05:30.360 both partners exploring sexual um relationships yes and if either the man or the woman in islam

00:05:37.560 do not give or satisfy the other half then really what they're doing is they're faltering on the on

00:05:44.200 the contract yeah uh this kind of sexual frigidity if you want to call it that is really a non-option

00:05:49.900 for both parties um otherwise quite frankly they're lacking and deficient of those individuals who do

00:05:55.840 that okay let me put this here this was the perspective that i wanted to come from which i

00:06:00.160 was just thinking maybe the hikma behind it yeah tell me if i'm wrong let's put this into context

00:06:05.060 because when we talk about these kind of things we need to put it in a let's frame it in a way

00:06:08.740 yeah in in islamic perspective so let's get this right yeah yeah a muslim man is he allowed to have sex

00:06:13.820 outside of marriage no okay we really need to contextualize this because it's very important

00:06:18.120 for us to get the context behind it you know there is a muslim man he before getting married he should

00:06:24.340 be staying away from woman because it's haram he gets married the right way yes and now he is imagine

00:06:30.480 living in the society when you're going out and you are faced with hypersexual society bro come on

00:06:36.100 let's be honest i traveled down the a4 or 6 big balance with half naked girls like you only it's in

00:06:41.820 your face and then you go to be at the cashier or wherever it may be and you've got a woman who's

00:06:45.780 dressed up in a provocative way and you can't even know your gaze to go to the bro social media

00:06:50.440 now let's put things into context because people are going to come and say why is the angels cursing

00:06:54.880 her let's let's put it into context yeah he comes home he's seen all that madness yeah he's that bro i

00:07:01.460 want to go to my wife and you know and there's a hadith of the process that supports it they said if you

00:07:05.700 go out and you see something that your desire is inclined go to your wife yeah it doesn't say go to

00:07:10.400 someone else go to your wife now now put things in the perspective as a muslim person because it's

00:07:15.040 not easy for someone to say oh but who cares um you know like it's an option i can just say you know

00:07:18.820 okay i'm going to go to my girlfriend or my side chick and just you know get it doesn't work like

00:07:22.200 that as a muslim we're bound by laws god almighty is legislated so therefore you're coming home now

00:07:26.920 and your your your wife you want to be intimate with her because you know you have these desires and

00:07:32.020 imagine she had the same and she says to you no now let's put the hadith into context

00:07:36.740 doesn't isn't that some kind of an oppression towards the husband if we put all that context

00:07:42.340 into the frame and say hold on a second here you're actually oppressing that person because

00:07:47.060 imagine for example if a wife came to the husband and said i want intimacy isn't that the right of a

00:07:52.880 woman that's so much so that a hadith of the prophet peace be upon him that a woman came and said i am

00:07:58.120 sexually satisfied did the did the prophet say how dare you as a woman you should not be sexually

00:08:02.900 satisfied go back to your husband i don't know if the hadith i'm not sure which one you're referring

00:08:07.000 to but the one i know the marriage oh yeah so this hadith is uh if if it wasn't for the fear of

00:08:16.620 allah i would have spat in his face yeah but what about the one where that one yeah that i don't

00:08:22.460 know that that one that's the one where i know the marriage yeah yeah okay this is interesting look

00:08:27.200 look look it's very important for us to emphasize on this yeah well you know why because for the

00:08:31.700 islamophobes out there the woman comes to the prophet peace be upon him says he's not sexually

00:08:35.800 satisfying me now she said that she didn't say he's not sexually she went further than that she said

00:08:40.760 if i if it wasn't for the fear of god i would have spat in his face can you imagine and you're

00:08:44.760 telling us that this is a man's religion yeah and she's going to the prophet of god and saying

00:08:49.140 i would have spat at my husband's face like big no no no you know why i'm being so graphic here

00:08:56.200 because to defeat this whole argument yeah i would have can you imagine the message of allah i would

00:09:01.160 have spat at my husband's face oh what does the prophet say does the prophet stop her yes how dare

00:09:05.700 you nothing did it stop her no no no he must have insulted her no no no hellfire hellfire no no

00:09:10.580 nothing like that what what did he say he gave her what she wanted really i'll give himself i'm

00:09:14.980 gonna leave that no but here's here's that's an important point actually i'm happy you raised it

00:09:19.540 but there's there is a part of the hadith that people feel uh men and women and everyone feel

00:09:24.780 upset about which is the fact that it's talking about a woman it's woman specific in the hadith yeah

00:09:28.720 that people need to understand something there are hadiths in the dozens in the dozens that reference men

00:09:35.500 only but also apply to women and sometimes they uh reference man only and don't don't even apply

00:09:41.620 to women okay if you're truthful so for instance if you're truthful for example there was a famous

00:09:49.360 hadith of the prophet was in the masjid yeah and um he was talking and basically he was saying about men

00:09:56.160 yeah uh that men the one who a man who go he started off talking about men then he talked about

00:10:02.460 women but he started off with a man and he said that a man who has intercourse with his wife a man

00:10:07.460 rajul who has intercourse with his wife and then he goes to his friends and starts talking about you

00:10:12.200 know sexual positions and what they've done in the bed yeah that this individual is basically like a

00:10:16.740 devil refer to him like a devil yeah so that's okay the word man is being used here but if if we want

00:10:22.460 to go further there's many hadiths like this i mean the way he's calling a man a devil yeah a specific

00:10:27.700 man that is doing a specific thing is like a devil he didn't have to be in the phrasing of

00:10:31.960 oh he's cursed but there's still some kind of what you call them or some blame yeah yeah and

00:10:37.420 moreover there's hadith for example a man who's like a youth doesn't enter a youth is male specific

00:10:45.160 it's a hadith that says allah will not look at him on the day yeah exactly you'll not look at him

00:10:48.960 well that's the youth is a man who's cuckold is is is like a translation but it's not really

00:10:55.400 it's it's not really a legitimate translation it's a man who doesn't mind his wife having

00:11:03.300 intercourse with other men basically or his sister or his mother yeah or yeah his wife or his sister

00:11:08.060 or woman focus so this is a man's specific kind of injunction here so they won't enter no one's

00:11:13.620 actually coming out and saying why is this hadith think about this for a second exactly why is there

00:11:17.500 not groups of people coming out if if if it was gender neutral as they claim it to be right

00:11:22.440 exactly why are not groups of men coming out so how come there's no such specific hadith

00:11:26.660 equivalent to women for women no you see what i mean exactly because if this day you thing is

00:11:31.980 and the the ghira or the protective jealousy is stressed for men then clearly if someone falters

00:11:38.360 if a man falters on that then he is punished more so than a woman right yeah so you can get instances

00:11:44.280 where because of the weakness of the human being has been created weak some men men physiologically

00:11:51.440 biologically or otherwise have certain weaknesses that are different to women and vice versa

00:11:55.380 so sometimes there can be a specific hadith that references specific punishments for specific

00:12:01.240 genders on specific issues exactly and that can be the case for man or woman exactly but if it was the

00:12:06.320 case if it was the case that islam only relegated these specific types of punishments and

00:12:13.840 consequences for women apart from men then you'd have a point but i can find you a dozen of hadiths

00:12:19.920 that mention i've just given you two or three but i can give you even the hadith which is talking

00:12:23.660 about for example for man the word man is used again if a man is entrusted with a secret rajul

00:12:29.420 yeah and then he goes back and it's in a manner now it's it's a trust he can't go to but obviously

00:12:34.400 this includes women as well yeah so this falls in a category of ahadith which references a man but

00:12:39.800 which includes the woman but which a man is mentioned right exactly there's lots of such hadiths

00:12:45.520 the fact that women are mentioned doesn't mean that man is now absolved from this in the sense

00:12:50.080 that now a man can um not give his wife her sexual rights or otherwise it doesn't mean that exactly

00:12:55.860 and like i said before and the hadith that i was talking about specifically which i clarified with

00:12:58.940 shaykh abu sofi as well is is the woman who came and said that basically she's not sexually satisfied

00:13:03.640 and the prophet and now the marriage so the thing is here and and a woman has a right to ask for

00:13:08.940 divorce if she's sexually not yani satisfied and this is islam so hope this dismantles and

00:13:15.480 destroys this whole uh discussion on this topic and as you can see guys there are individuals who

00:13:20.240 claim that they've lifted left islam because of this but when you deep deeper you realize that

00:13:24.280 the issue the issue it's never the issue is never with islam it's with the individual because these

00:13:29.900 if you dig deeper you can see that this clicker answer what would you have to say for this you're

00:13:33.880 going to ignore it but let me add another point this idea of because we started with this and i think

00:13:38.640 it's important to end with it as well which is the point of marital rape i mean if you look at

00:13:42.460 books of like kitab al-um of uh chef and i've also seen some treatises and fatawa going all the way

00:13:48.060 back to that for imams that rape is punishable by whipping and all these kinds of they mentioned

00:13:53.860 that in their books for if at that time they had milky ameen which is like the equivalent of a

00:13:58.860 concubine or not even a concubine like a uh um indentured servant let's call them yeah indentured servants

00:14:05.340 they had that in that time and they said if you rape an indentured servant that's under your

00:14:08.400 property yani then they would be then you should be flogged and a hundred whips and all those kind

00:14:14.300 imagine doing it to your wife and obviously the hadith of the prophet is there's no

00:14:18.700 harming or reciprocating harm which is a very generic hadith you can't harm if someone if a

00:14:23.220 woman doesn't want to have sex with a man okay honestly we're not saying this as as a means of

00:14:27.880 apologetics this actually has pastoral implications yeah if your wife don't want to have sex with you

00:14:32.680 with all due respect like that woman if she doesn't want to do that for over a span of let's

00:14:39.040 say a couple of weeks couple of months let's just say one week two weeks and she has no valid excuse

00:14:43.740 let's just say why are you with her still with all due respect if she doesn't want to have intercourse

00:14:47.960 with you you're unless there's okay that you're trying to arbitrate you're trying to solve the

00:14:52.920 issue but if she's not attracted and she's not like then really what you should be doing instead of

00:14:58.320 trying to force yourself and being a macho man all these kinds of things you know what but this

00:15:03.520 this kind of marriage is not going to you're right but for you to even say that who said that actually

00:15:07.320 happens in the like why has it become a muslim issue where have you heard this like the thing is

00:15:11.960 where did you get this from do you see how we're subconsciously yes subconsciously they're the same

00:15:17.400 thing but one is for hierarchy we're in the uh with the peasants the the subconscious mind is picked

00:15:23.080 up so much that as muslims we have to be like no no but what's it it's not even a muslim problem where

00:15:26.980 did you get this from that it's muslim man you know out in the hunt doing this you have a right

00:15:32.160 to divorce she can get a divorce guys we're gonna end on that i think we've destroyed this argument i

00:15:35.560 don't think anyone can come back yeah it's janazah from sisters hope you guys enjoyed this video

00:15:39.160 inshallah share it with your friends and family and those who have been affected by this hadith

00:15:42.520 here's your answer may allah bless you guys inshallah thank you hijab thank you very much

00:15:46.560 till next time assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

Ali Dawah - January 29, 2021

IS MARITAL RAPE ALLOWED IN ISLAM？ - REACTION VIDEO

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