Bankas Podcast - November 18, 2025


BANKAS PODCAST #110 | MERIDIAN HALL TORONTO RECAP WITH ARMIN ARBABI AND ARI SHIELD


Episode Stats

Length

57 minutes

Words per Minute

168.453

Word Count

9,692

Sentence Count

1,022

Misogynist Sentences

46

Hate Speech Sentences

82


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

On this week's episode, the boys are back in the Grid studio. They discuss the Kamala Harris and Joe Rogan press conference, and what it's like to be a comedian in Los Angeles. Plus, they talk about the weirdest thing that happened at a comedy club, and why you should trust your friends.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.600 I'm so happy to be back. I feel like I never left.
00:00:03.340 This is the nicest podcast studio I've been in.
00:00:05.480 Mentally, I've been in this room for years.
00:00:12.800 Is there a button or something?
00:00:16.900 Okay, cool.
00:00:18.800 More break-in.
00:00:19.660 This one's kind of...
00:00:20.820 You do it, please.
00:00:23.580 I just, I really...
00:00:24.860 It's heavy-duty, though.
00:00:29.200 Yeah, it's newer.
00:00:32.720 Kidwar. Kidwar. Older.
00:00:37.020 Kidwai.
00:00:40.780 Newer Kidwai.
00:00:44.580 Ron White.
00:00:51.280 Two days.
00:00:52.560 A day. I'm leaving tomorrow.
00:00:56.000 I kind of want to move back.
00:00:57.380 Yeah, I came...
00:00:57.920 Well, I had my show at Meridian.
00:01:01.840 It was fucking sick, dude.
00:01:04.000 It was like...
00:01:04.620 Yeah.
00:01:06.800 She was there, too, the next day.
00:01:08.220 That's where we went.
00:01:10.720 Yeah.
00:01:15.120 Yeah.
00:01:16.520 You made her feel it.
00:01:19.380 We'll tell you.
00:01:21.040 You'll hear it.
00:01:21.660 Are we rolling yet?
00:01:33.900 Grid studio, right?
00:01:42.280 Peace to resistance.
00:01:43.240 Check, check.
00:01:49.640 One, two, one, two.
00:01:50.600 Check, check, check.
00:01:51.540 One, two, one, two.
00:01:53.100 One, two, one, two.
00:01:54.340 Check, check, check.
00:01:55.420 One, two, check.
00:01:57.520 Check, check.
00:01:58.700 One, two.
00:01:59.700 Put it a little closer.
00:02:01.900 I'll do what he says.
00:02:03.220 Move it closer.
00:02:05.700 Check, check.
00:02:06.300 I think I know how to use a microphone.
00:02:07.760 Watermelon, fruits, vegetables.
00:02:09.140 I've been doing this 15 years.
00:02:10.200 I'm supposed to talk like that.
00:02:12.380 Combo.
00:02:12.880 It's good.
00:02:13.500 Sounds good.
00:02:14.220 All right.
00:02:22.000 Oh, you're going to hand...
00:02:22.820 Okay, cool.
00:02:23.760 What was the question you asked?
00:02:24.920 I just wanted you to comment.
00:02:26.240 Okay.
00:02:27.380 Well, what I was explaining
00:02:28.980 when I put the book down...
00:02:30.700 Wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:02:36.600 It's a beautiful book.
00:02:37.680 We went to see Kamala Harris today
00:02:40.200 after my show at Meridian Hall.
00:02:42.780 And it was...
00:02:44.240 I tell you, she's a genius.
00:02:47.540 Honestly, it was kind of funnier.
00:02:49.220 For us, yeah.
00:02:50.960 Yeah, it was very funny.
00:02:52.120 It was actually...
00:02:52.600 We weren't allowed to laugh, though.
00:02:53.920 Every time we laughed,
00:02:54.760 people were like,
00:02:55.180 can you please stop it?
00:02:56.820 I was like, I'm enjoying the show.
00:02:58.620 I'm allowed to laugh at, you know, her laugh.
00:03:03.580 Yeah, she's laughing.
00:03:04.820 I'm laughing with her.
00:03:05.780 I'm laughing at her.
00:03:06.620 But the best moment was,
00:03:10.240 at one point,
00:03:11.300 I just played the Joe Rogan podcast,
00:03:14.000 Donald Trump episode,
00:03:16.100 full blast on my phone.
00:03:19.220 And, like, the woman who was interviewing
00:03:21.760 or moderating with Kamala was talking,
00:03:24.500 and, like, the whole theater just heard,
00:03:26.820 Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.
00:03:28.420 She was like,
00:03:31.820 I'm Kamala.
00:03:33.600 It's really funny.
00:03:34.900 It was genuinely...
00:03:36.280 Watching you watch that was like seeing you watch CNN live.
00:03:39.240 It was very entertaining.
00:03:40.600 Well, she was saying some crazy stuff.
00:03:42.540 I mean, she was...
00:03:43.400 She actually gave some genuinely good advice
00:03:45.620 that I feel like I shouldn't have gotten from her.
00:03:48.340 because Kamala Harris is talking.
00:03:51.720 I'm like, you know, okay,
00:03:52.980 like, aside from the politics,
00:03:54.400 she's got some good points about,
00:03:55.900 like, she had a good point about,
00:03:57.340 you know, who can you trust
00:03:59.840 when you're going through tough times or whatever?
00:04:03.020 And she basically said,
00:04:03.980 you have to have friends around you
00:04:05.760 that make fun of you.
00:04:07.240 They're willing to...
00:04:08.240 When you fall down,
00:04:09.280 they're willing to make fun of you,
00:04:10.460 but they still help you get up
00:04:11.720 and they push you forward.
00:04:13.400 And I was like, yeah, that's...
00:04:14.860 And she even mentioned that, you know,
00:04:17.760 your close friends,
00:04:18.720 the people you say things to
00:04:20.460 that you're not supposed to say out loud,
00:04:22.440 basically...
00:04:23.440 The people you say the N-word to.
00:04:25.300 Well, that's for us.
00:04:26.540 But generally, it's for people, you know,
00:04:29.220 she means when you say something politically incorrect
00:04:31.480 with your friends,
00:04:32.320 but the audience didn't like that part.
00:04:34.880 I liked...
00:04:35.220 I was genuinely like, she's right,
00:04:36.900 but the audience was like,
00:04:38.620 well, we're not supposed to make fun of people at all.
00:04:43.080 Half the audience was like in, you know,
00:04:44.880 had C&I dogs and...
00:04:46.880 Yeah.
00:04:47.740 There was like eight C&I dogs.
00:04:50.380 There was people with like masks
00:04:52.180 and then they had like the glasses
00:04:54.400 that also had straps.
00:04:55.940 Like their heads were just strapped.
00:04:57.840 It is kind of funny how many C&I dogs
00:05:01.700 were at the Kamala Harris event
00:05:05.600 at Meridian Hall
00:05:06.760 because, you know,
00:05:08.260 you have to be completely blind.
00:05:10.420 Imagine if it's like blind death.
00:05:12.780 Imagine if those people were like fans of yours
00:05:14.720 and then someone just pulled a prank like,
00:05:16.480 oh yeah, Ben Banks is a Sunday at Meridian.
00:05:19.120 Just come in blind.
00:05:20.540 Genuinely, people were trying to get us kicked out.
00:05:23.640 People were trying.
00:05:24.700 They were going up to like the security.
00:05:27.580 You know, like these guys,
00:05:28.800 they keep laughing.
00:05:29.980 They keep playing the Joe Rogan experience.
00:05:31.820 They play...
00:05:32.520 Well, so the real...
00:05:33.700 I got the idea to play the podcast
00:05:35.860 because some guy,
00:05:37.020 an old guy behind us,
00:05:38.980 the woman who was moderating it,
00:05:40.920 talked about her podcast
00:05:41.900 and I guess he looked it up
00:05:42.860 and pressed play for a second.
00:05:44.580 And I was like,
00:05:45.180 oh, that's a brilliant idea.
00:05:46.260 Joe Rogan.
00:05:47.580 And pressed play.
00:05:48.340 It's like a woke guy did it first.
00:05:52.240 So like they could...
00:05:53.120 Oh, the other really funny thing was,
00:05:55.540 so Kamala Harris is on stage at Meridian Hall
00:05:58.140 and she goes,
00:05:59.600 she's talking about,
00:06:00.600 you shouldn't say sorry.
00:06:02.660 Don't apologize.
00:06:04.140 If you want to ask a question,
00:06:05.120 don't say sorry.
00:06:05.660 Can I ask a question?
00:06:06.340 Just have...
00:06:07.180 And then the usher came over
00:06:09.240 to tell us to be quiet
00:06:10.220 and I was like,
00:06:10.840 she told us not to say sorry.
00:06:13.400 And then the usher was so dumb
00:06:15.940 that she was like,
00:06:17.120 well, you don't have to apologize.
00:06:18.340 You just have to like,
00:06:19.080 she was like,
00:06:19.400 okay, well, take Kamala's advice,
00:06:21.160 but at least be quiet.
00:06:22.960 The first two times,
00:06:23.880 the usher was this like black lady
00:06:25.320 and she was like,
00:06:25.860 guys, please.
00:06:26.940 And then like the third time
00:06:28.380 they sent like a black guy
00:06:29.500 that came by
00:06:30.100 and he was like,
00:06:30.620 yo, bro,
00:06:30.980 like honestly,
00:06:31.500 like I get it.
00:06:32.140 But like I'm doing my job.
00:06:33.740 Come on, chill.
00:06:34.880 Like it was so funny.
00:06:39.060 Yeah, I texted the guy
00:06:41.260 because we were in that venue
00:06:42.880 the night before.
00:06:43.680 So we literally,
00:06:44.680 I had the guy's number
00:06:46.120 who runs the venue.
00:06:46.900 I'm like,
00:06:47.160 hey,
00:06:48.100 can we meet Kamala Harris?
00:06:50.420 And then he just responds.
00:06:51.800 I'm going to,
00:06:52.180 I can ask secret service.
00:06:53.740 I was like,
00:06:54.020 eh, forget it.
00:06:55.320 We don't need to do that.
00:06:58.240 The guy where he,
00:06:59.480 oh,
00:06:59.660 they did a Q&A,
00:07:02.060 but it was a pre-written Q&A
00:07:04.760 that people had to,
00:07:06.120 you know,
00:07:06.780 give their,
00:07:07.740 they probably had to do it online
00:07:09.240 to be honest,
00:07:10.640 submit their questions.
00:07:11.880 But when she brought up the question
00:07:13.380 and the name,
00:07:14.160 she'd be like,
00:07:14.580 who,
00:07:14.860 who asked this question?
00:07:15.900 They'd stand up.
00:07:17.440 And then for the third one,
00:07:18.660 it was,
00:07:19.100 it was like,
00:07:20.560 I hope I'm pronouncing this right.
00:07:22.080 When she said,
00:07:22.740 I hope I'm pronouncing this right.
00:07:24.020 I thought it was going to be
00:07:24.520 an Indian name.
00:07:25.220 Yeah.
00:07:25.420 I thought it was going to be
00:07:26.040 like Muhammad something,
00:07:27.300 but it was just Princess Gilderhand.
00:07:29.660 Yeah.
00:07:29.860 Then I stood up
00:07:30.900 and everyone got rattled.
00:07:32.480 All the people around me
00:07:33.320 who I'd been disrupting
00:07:35.780 by just harassing,
00:07:37.940 by laughing,
00:07:39.820 were like,
00:07:40.840 no,
00:07:41.180 sit down,
00:07:41.820 get,
00:07:42.220 it's not him.
00:07:44.140 And even Kamala knew
00:07:45.220 I was joking.
00:07:46.040 She was like,
00:07:46.380 it's not that guy for sure.
00:07:47.420 It's definitely not that guy.
00:07:49.980 She's like,
00:07:50.620 it's this,
00:07:51.080 but that's Ben Bank.
00:07:53.120 That's the guy
00:07:53.680 who was here last night.
00:07:54.360 Now it was funny
00:07:58.500 watching you do that
00:07:59.360 in a jacket
00:08:00.080 that probably is worth
00:08:00.920 more than a lot
00:08:01.520 of those people's rent.
00:08:04.700 Some of those people were rich.
00:08:06.140 I gotta admit,
00:08:07.040 there were some,
00:08:07.600 there were some rich people there.
00:08:09.240 There was,
00:08:09.840 before we walked in,
00:08:10.940 there was the line
00:08:11.680 that stretched like
00:08:12.720 around the block.
00:08:13.820 And then there was people
00:08:14.680 that we were talking to
00:08:15.540 that were like,
00:08:15.940 we bought these tickets
00:08:16.720 months ago
00:08:17.420 and drove from New York,
00:08:18.640 which is crazy.
00:08:19.880 Well,
00:08:20.120 they put up,
00:08:21.020 they had metal detectors
00:08:21.980 and they searched everybody.
00:08:23.360 But for me,
00:08:24.540 I think they just like
00:08:25.320 let everybody in.
00:08:26.880 They kind of were like,
00:08:27.640 yo,
00:08:28.160 were there metal detectors
00:08:29.200 for mine?
00:08:29.760 No.
00:08:30.920 So they just pulled those
00:08:31.960 out of a closet
00:08:32.620 and they're like,
00:08:33.440 yeah.
00:08:34.340 Or maybe she travels
00:08:35.320 with them like a carny.
00:08:37.620 Mark Carney.
00:08:39.000 Kamala Harris just travels
00:08:40.100 with metal detectors maybe.
00:08:41.400 I don't know.
00:08:42.020 They were definitely
00:08:42.600 the venue's metal detectors.
00:08:44.220 But I feel like
00:08:44.760 I went through metal detectors
00:08:45.740 when I went to that venue
00:08:46.600 before when I went
00:08:47.400 to see a few things.
00:08:49.680 I've never gone to
00:08:50.560 Maria Hall for a show,
00:08:51.460 so I don't know.
00:08:52.060 It's wild that the unions
00:08:54.380 run all those venues.
00:08:57.540 It's like IATSE.
00:08:59.300 It's like the biggest union
00:09:00.300 in the world apparently
00:09:01.240 or one of.
00:09:03.500 And it's all the people
00:09:04.900 who,
00:09:06.220 it's IATSE,
00:09:07.120 not Nazi.
00:09:08.280 Settle down over there.
00:09:10.160 But it's I-A-T
00:09:11.840 something,
00:09:13.240 S-E or something.
00:09:14.220 But it's the people
00:09:15.580 who work at the venue.
00:09:16.380 Like the sound guy
00:09:18.940 is a union guy
00:09:20.020 and they had a break
00:09:21.100 during the,
00:09:22.280 like right before the show
00:09:23.260 they had an hour break.
00:09:24.520 Yeah.
00:09:25.120 Which is insane.
00:09:26.620 It's like
00:09:27.240 you work a job
00:09:29.120 that's like four hours of work.
00:09:31.080 You don't need a break.
00:09:32.420 Go on.
00:09:33.600 I need a break.
00:09:34.680 Where's the comedy union?
00:09:36.820 Breaking my back out here.
00:09:38.660 I need some support.
00:09:39.880 Ari?
00:09:44.780 What were your thoughts
00:09:45.620 of today?
00:09:47.380 That was very uncomfortable.
00:09:50.040 Yeah,
00:09:50.260 Ari was like really scared.
00:09:51.800 Ari was just pretending
00:09:52.560 to really like it.
00:09:53.520 He was like,
00:09:53.860 he's clapping and shit.
00:09:59.040 I was doing that
00:10:00.060 to piss you off.
00:10:01.540 Oh.
00:10:02.120 I thought you were doing it
00:10:02.880 to like cover for us.
00:10:04.340 That was working.
00:10:05.320 A little bit.
00:10:06.880 It's a little buffer.
00:10:07.380 You'd be clapping.
00:10:08.400 The people next to me
00:10:09.300 were laughing.
00:10:10.600 They enjoyed my stuff?
00:10:12.000 I don't know.
00:10:12.500 Enjoy.
00:10:12.880 Yeah, I guess.
00:10:14.140 They enjoyed my stuff.
00:10:16.680 They enjoyed my act.
00:10:17.540 My material.
00:10:18.560 There was one point
00:10:19.340 where Kamala was like
00:10:20.880 talking about Trump.
00:10:22.600 She was like,
00:10:23.120 he who shall not be named.
00:10:24.700 You were just like,
00:10:25.620 Donald Trump.
00:10:27.080 That's Trump.
00:10:28.720 Remember the name.
00:10:30.900 It's crashing out so hard.
00:10:35.660 It was fun watching.
00:10:36.820 It was like taking you
00:10:37.820 to like a haunted house.
00:10:39.020 It was like trans people.
00:10:43.140 DEI.
00:10:43.640 No.
00:10:45.620 It's awesome.
00:10:46.760 I see why people are like,
00:10:48.020 yeah,
00:10:48.100 we're going to take the kids.
00:10:49.000 Well,
00:10:49.320 I was like,
00:10:49.840 sometimes you got to take
00:10:50.660 your boy.
00:10:51.140 Like,
00:10:51.580 like,
00:10:51.740 you're not,
00:10:52.060 you might not like this,
00:10:52.980 but that was,
00:10:53.960 she was like,
00:10:54.400 there's children here.
00:10:55.360 So I won't say,
00:10:56.440 I think she was going to call him
00:10:57.340 like a prick or something.
00:10:58.560 I think she was going to say,
00:10:59.660 she was talking about something
00:11:00.700 like people talk shit.
00:11:02.820 She was,
00:11:03.320 it was going into the,
00:11:04.560 like people that have
00:11:05.200 the wrong information.
00:11:07.680 Like,
00:11:08.040 she was like,
00:11:08.460 sometimes when people,
00:11:09.420 you disagree with them,
00:11:10.180 it's not like,
00:11:10.780 they're not operating
00:11:11.820 on the same information,
00:11:13.000 which is like,
00:11:14.560 I mean,
00:11:14.880 you could say the same
00:11:15.700 about people on the left
00:11:17.180 from a right wing,
00:11:18.100 but like,
00:11:18.340 she didn't say anything
00:11:19.180 that was really anything.
00:11:22.380 Well,
00:11:22.920 also she,
00:11:23.700 everything she said
00:11:24.620 was unquestioned.
00:11:26.900 So she can say,
00:11:28.320 she can say whatever she wants.
00:11:29.540 Nobody's going to be like,
00:11:30.420 uh,
00:11:30.860 actually like literally,
00:11:32.760 yeah,
00:11:33.220 there's not a single person,
00:11:34.920 you know,
00:11:36.180 and,
00:11:36.360 and that's what makes
00:11:37.760 those events bad.
00:11:39.440 Like it'd be so much
00:11:40.140 more of an interesting event
00:11:41.560 to have Republicans
00:11:43.020 and Democrats at it
00:11:44.740 and like have like
00:11:45.540 a Republican guy
00:11:46.480 interviewing her
00:11:47.480 and you know what I mean?
00:11:49.180 And it's like,
00:11:49.720 actually,
00:11:50.300 that would be like
00:11:50.920 really exciting.
00:11:51.360 That'd be cool.
00:11:51.860 Then do an intermission
00:11:52.760 and then it's like a debate
00:11:53.680 though,
00:11:53.880 I guess,
00:11:54.320 but it's not really,
00:11:55.200 but that's more healthy
00:11:55.980 for society rather than
00:11:57.160 a fucking echo chamber
00:11:58.220 for sure.
00:11:59.340 And like when she was
00:12:00.900 talking about information
00:12:01.760 and the people who
00:12:02.620 disagree with you
00:12:03.600 and have opinions
00:12:04.300 you don't like
00:12:04.920 are running off
00:12:05.740 different information.
00:12:07.140 She is adding fuel
00:12:09.400 to the fire
00:12:10.000 and just saying,
00:12:10.620 no,
00:12:10.740 you're right about everything.
00:12:12.320 Well,
00:12:12.360 she did say we need
00:12:13.140 to fight fire with fire
00:12:14.440 at one point.
00:12:15.220 She did that right
00:12:16.400 after I played
00:12:17.080 the Rogan experience thing.
00:12:18.860 It was very scary.
00:12:19.860 Yeah.
00:12:20.600 She was looking
00:12:21.220 a little bit
00:12:21.640 in our direction.
00:12:22.420 She was like,
00:12:22.760 I know that guy
00:12:23.220 is a regular
00:12:23.620 at the mothership.
00:12:26.680 Originally from Toronto,
00:12:27.580 Ontario,
00:12:27.880 now living
00:12:28.160 in Austin,
00:12:28.540 Texas.
00:12:28.660 she said fight fire
00:12:31.240 with fire,
00:12:31.720 but she also said
00:12:32.480 something softer
00:12:33.180 earlier on
00:12:33.860 where she said
00:12:34.620 that the Democrats
00:12:38.340 needed to,
00:12:39.900 she said it so softly
00:12:41.320 though.
00:12:41.600 She was like,
00:12:42.100 what she,
00:12:42.620 she meant was
00:12:43.740 we need to stop
00:12:45.300 talking about slavery
00:12:46.960 and,
00:12:47.720 you know,
00:12:48.180 and,
00:12:48.420 and,
00:12:48.760 you know,
00:12:49.380 what happened
00:12:50.080 when we got
00:12:50.800 to North America
00:12:52.080 and like using
00:12:53.380 all this old
00:12:54.600 history that's,
00:12:55.700 you know,
00:12:56.560 to,
00:12:56.800 to blame people
00:12:58.600 for things.
00:12:59.020 That's what I think
00:12:59.840 she meant,
00:13:00.320 but what she said
00:13:01.580 was we have
00:13:03.420 to be,
00:13:04.120 you know,
00:13:05.380 we have to be
00:13:06.120 more relevant
00:13:06.720 and we have to
00:13:08.040 talk about more
00:13:10.160 what's like
00:13:10.820 in happening
00:13:11.860 in the present
00:13:12.560 and,
00:13:13.240 and have our
00:13:14.100 platform run
00:13:15.280 on that
00:13:15.720 instead of,
00:13:16.460 but she didn't
00:13:17.040 say instead of,
00:13:18.500 that's the thing
00:13:19.100 is they,
00:13:19.820 it's like she says
00:13:20.600 half of it
00:13:21.280 and she's like,
00:13:21.760 you can either
00:13:22.260 figure it out
00:13:23.280 or not
00:13:23.680 because really
00:13:24.380 it doesn't matter
00:13:24.900 to her.
00:13:25.180 She's there to,
00:13:25.820 I think she's there
00:13:26.840 to stop taking it.
00:13:27.360 This tour she's doing
00:13:28.280 seems like a,
00:13:29.140 like when a comic
00:13:29.800 does a club
00:13:30.440 just to work
00:13:30.980 on new bits.
00:13:32.080 Like she's like
00:13:32.820 trying to like gauge
00:13:33.780 like,
00:13:34.460 okay,
00:13:34.580 what should I
00:13:35.060 actually run on
00:13:35.860 for the next one?
00:13:37.240 She didn't seem
00:13:37.980 prepared.
00:13:38.480 Like it wasn't like
00:13:39.400 she,
00:13:39.760 she kind of phoned
00:13:40.440 it and it seemed
00:13:41.040 like,
00:13:41.440 oh,
00:13:41.580 everybody,
00:13:42.120 both of them
00:13:42.740 phoned it in.
00:13:43.700 No girl interviewing
00:13:44.560 was crying.
00:13:45.740 She started crying.
00:13:46.660 Sophia Bush.
00:13:47.860 Who is she?
00:13:48.860 I looked her up.
00:13:49.660 She's like a,
00:13:50.360 I think I found
00:13:51.700 the right Wikipedia.
00:13:52.600 There's definitely
00:13:53.160 a bunch of Sophia Bushes,
00:13:54.260 but she's like an actor
00:13:55.120 and activist.
00:13:56.900 Sounds like a porn star.
00:13:58.180 Yeah.
00:13:58.900 70s.
00:14:00.300 Sophie Bush.
00:14:01.820 George Bush's daughter.
00:14:03.880 Oh yeah.
00:14:04.960 Is she,
00:14:05.320 she's not a Bush.
00:14:06.260 She's just aped up.
00:14:07.480 I mean,
00:14:07.640 it'd be kind of funny
00:14:08.440 if she was like a Bush
00:14:09.660 that was like,
00:14:10.180 oh,
00:14:10.300 I've had enough.
00:14:10.760 Yeah.
00:14:10.920 The moderator crying
00:14:12.040 was insane.
00:14:14.000 You think she,
00:14:14.420 I almost want to see
00:14:15.280 another show to be like,
00:14:16.600 like,
00:14:16.780 you know when a comic
00:14:17.440 has like a moment
00:14:18.120 where they like,
00:14:18.760 you laugh for your own bit.
00:14:20.400 I wanted to know
00:14:21.120 if it was like that.
00:14:22.020 Like,
00:14:22.260 do you have a scheduled,
00:14:23.740 and now I tear up to,
00:14:25.480 the,
00:14:25.680 the difference in laughs,
00:14:27.240 like the,
00:14:28.180 the woke laugh,
00:14:29.300 the,
00:14:29.440 the,
00:14:29.720 the laugh that woke comics
00:14:31.180 get is such a,
00:14:32.220 like,
00:14:32.600 like,
00:14:32.980 it's just like a,
00:14:33.780 it's never real.
00:14:38.840 It's all fake.
00:14:39.660 And a lot of those people
00:14:40.700 have been trained
00:14:42.040 to not find things
00:14:44.040 that are funny,
00:14:44.680 funny.
00:14:46.240 They,
00:14:46.820 as soon as they go,
00:14:47.800 they're like,
00:14:48.800 I've seen,
00:14:49.280 have you ever like made
00:14:50.000 somebody laugh
00:14:50.540 and they kind of laugh
00:14:51.280 and then they get mad?
00:14:52.380 Yeah.
00:14:52.780 Like,
00:14:53.200 they're like,
00:14:53.760 no,
00:14:55.500 you can't,
00:14:56.140 well,
00:14:56.400 that's because
00:14:57.120 you've been brainwashed
00:14:59.620 into thinking that,
00:15:00.540 no,
00:15:00.800 I have to rewire myself
00:15:02.680 because it's 2025 now,
00:15:04.240 so I can't laugh at that.
00:15:05.500 No,
00:15:05.720 that's mental illness.
00:15:07.000 That's,
00:15:07.440 that's you putting a barrier
00:15:09.220 in your brain
00:15:09.960 that shouldn't exist.
00:15:11.740 It takes away your humanity.
00:15:13.940 I really,
00:15:14.800 you know,
00:15:15.340 it felt,
00:15:16.220 it felt so un,
00:15:18.100 not unhuman,
00:15:19.340 like,
00:15:19.520 obviously everybody's a human,
00:15:20.720 but it felt so,
00:15:21.800 like robotic,
00:15:23.940 the whole thing.
00:15:24.640 Like,
00:15:24.760 everybody felt like
00:15:25.640 they were dialed
00:15:27.200 into some weird
00:15:28.180 other level
00:15:30.260 of consciousness,
00:15:31.260 not like a higher level,
00:15:32.240 like a lower level
00:15:33.080 or like a more dull level
00:15:34.580 where it's,
00:15:35.580 your consciousness
00:15:36.720 is enclosed.
00:15:37.540 You don't question anything.
00:15:38.880 You're just going,
00:15:40.120 she's the best thing.
00:15:41.660 Everything she's saying,
00:15:42.560 I understand
00:15:43.220 because it's like
00:15:44.320 you've pre-convinced yourself.
00:15:46.240 Well,
00:15:46.380 what I'm curious about
00:15:47.400 and this kind of like extends
00:15:48.680 to like all people
00:15:49.460 that go to like anything
00:15:50.460 where like a politician
00:15:51.420 just speaks.
00:15:52.100 It's like,
00:15:52.380 well,
00:15:52.460 what are you really getting
00:15:53.620 out of this content wise?
00:15:55.360 Like,
00:15:55.480 how is this entertaining?
00:15:56.740 Like this,
00:15:57.400 this is,
00:15:58.000 you're not a politician,
00:15:58.820 but like,
00:16:00.040 like if you went to go watch
00:16:01.100 like George Bush speak
00:16:02.360 at a thing
00:16:03.000 and he was just like
00:16:03.880 talking about America,
00:16:05.140 like,
00:16:05.960 what are you getting?
00:16:07.060 What is she getting?
00:16:08.380 Well,
00:16:08.600 she's getting money,
00:16:09.640 but like as an audience member,
00:16:12.620 it's like,
00:16:12.820 what did those people go?
00:16:14.600 Like,
00:16:14.840 I want to know
00:16:15.280 what they took from that.
00:16:16.880 Like,
00:16:16.940 I get why some people
00:16:17.860 brought their kids.
00:16:19.120 Like,
00:16:19.160 I can empathize with like,
00:16:20.120 I have a daughter or whatever
00:16:21.560 and it's kind of something
00:16:23.560 to look up to.
00:16:24.920 Complete idiot morons,
00:16:26.340 but yeah,
00:16:26.740 I see why they would
00:16:28.260 think that they should bring,
00:16:31.580 like,
00:16:31.800 I get why people
00:16:32.560 wanted to go watch
00:16:33.220 Charlie Kirk
00:16:33.820 because it was like funny.
00:16:34.340 Bringing my trans kid
00:16:35.240 to Kamala Harris
00:16:37.520 this weekend.
00:16:38.000 What are you guys doing?
00:16:38.680 Yeah,
00:16:38.800 well,
00:16:38.900 you can't take her
00:16:39.400 to the Calgary Stampede.
00:16:39.980 Are you going to leave?
00:16:40.400 Are you going to leave game?
00:16:42.020 Take her to the Raptors,
00:16:42.980 put that on the Jumbotron.
00:16:46.000 You know,
00:16:46.160 it was one of the saddest
00:16:47.000 things I've ever seen
00:16:47.640 in my life.
00:16:48.720 No,
00:16:48.960 I've seen way worse.
00:16:51.440 What?
00:16:55.040 What's worse than Kamala Harris
00:16:56.220 at a Meridian Hall?
00:16:59.820 Ben Bank's
00:17:00.340 Meridian Hall.
00:17:01.560 No,
00:17:02.420 Ben Bank is
00:17:03.260 at Pizza Wine Disco.
00:17:05.080 It's such a better,
00:17:06.100 like,
00:17:06.400 obviously my show
00:17:07.060 was in a million times better,
00:17:08.140 but my lights were off.
00:17:09.540 Like,
00:17:09.700 she had the lights on
00:17:10.740 and now I think
00:17:11.700 that was probably
00:17:12.300 like a security thing too
00:17:13.580 where like she can't even,
00:17:15.560 she has to,
00:17:15.960 for me there was just like,
00:17:16.960 yeah,
00:17:17.120 it's Ben Bank's,
00:17:17.660 hopefully nothing bad happens.
00:17:19.560 Yeah,
00:17:19.940 oh,
00:17:20.360 Metal Tech does not,
00:17:21.160 we don't need those.
00:17:21.740 Come on in,
00:17:22.160 everybody in.
00:17:23.080 Yeah,
00:17:23.400 we filled 2,300 seats
00:17:25.680 in 15 minutes.
00:17:27.500 Meanwhile,
00:17:27.900 hers took two hours.
00:17:29.480 Yeah.
00:17:29.940 Insane.
00:17:30.940 And then they turn
00:17:31.680 all the lights off.
00:17:32.280 I want the lights on.
00:17:33.080 Turn all the lights on.
00:17:34.300 I want to see these people.
00:17:36.040 No,
00:17:36.420 I like the lights off.
00:17:37.920 I like performing
00:17:38.620 just black,
00:17:40.300 pitch black,
00:17:41.340 all blacks.
00:17:42.940 I like performing
00:17:43.680 for all blacks.
00:17:44.800 Have you ever done
00:17:45.180 an all black room?
00:17:46.800 No.
00:17:47.540 Yeah.
00:17:48.360 You have?
00:17:49.160 Yeah.
00:17:49.540 Did you kill?
00:17:51.600 Yes,
00:17:52.160 and I bombed
00:17:52.880 on both.
00:17:54.500 On the same set?
00:17:57.360 Yeah,
00:17:57.840 I told one joke
00:17:58.500 that worked
00:17:58.900 and one joke
00:17:59.420 that didn't.
00:17:59.900 That's how it went for me.
00:18:00.820 I was bombing
00:18:02.140 and then I was like,
00:18:02.800 I think I'm too white
00:18:03.580 to be here
00:18:04.040 and then I got like
00:18:04.720 an applause break.
00:18:06.680 That started at all.
00:18:07.400 I was like three years in.
00:18:08.300 Three years old.
00:18:12.000 Explain,
00:18:12.620 Ari,
00:18:12.860 explain to the people
00:18:13.480 what three years in is.
00:18:15.520 Means that you're
00:18:16.380 like a three-year-old child.
00:18:19.560 It means if you've only
00:18:20.660 been doing comedy
00:18:21.480 for the amount of time
00:18:23.080 you've been doing it,
00:18:23.960 it translates to your age.
00:18:25.440 So if you've been doing it
00:18:26.120 for three years,
00:18:26.720 you're a three-year-old.
00:18:28.160 Yeah.
00:18:28.940 10,
00:18:29.340 10-year-old.
00:18:29.740 15,
00:18:30.460 15,
00:18:30.940 20,
00:18:31.360 20-year-old.
00:18:32.940 25,
00:18:33.880 24-year-old.
00:18:34.940 Then it changes.
00:18:36.280 It's like Fahrenheit.
00:18:36.860 Should we talk about
00:18:42.920 me walking
00:18:43.600 the after party?
00:18:45.140 Yeah.
00:18:46.140 So the after party,
00:18:47.500 I want to,
00:18:48.900 let me take this
00:18:49.920 moment to apologize
00:18:52.200 to the fans
00:18:53.300 who gave the after party.
00:18:54.560 No,
00:18:54.760 I mean,
00:18:55.500 so I got approached
00:18:57.540 by a club,
00:18:58.820 not a comedy club,
00:18:59.720 a nightclub
00:19:00.280 to do an after party
00:19:01.420 where like
00:19:02.600 I would be paid
00:19:03.320 to go
00:19:03.820 and so obviously
00:19:05.180 I'm going to do it
00:19:05.920 and then we did it
00:19:07.480 last time
00:19:08.060 as well
00:19:09.160 at a different place
00:19:09.980 at Petty Cash.
00:19:12.180 This time we did
00:19:12.620 a pizza wine disco
00:19:13.380 and it was fine.
00:19:15.640 I mean,
00:19:15.820 the only weird part
00:19:16.680 was they wanted us
00:19:17.840 to show up at midnight
00:19:18.680 and they didn't really
00:19:20.840 say that on the flyer
00:19:22.400 or explain that to me
00:19:23.880 the day before.
00:19:25.760 Yeah.
00:19:25.840 They just were like,
00:19:26.820 hey,
00:19:27.140 can you post this flyer
00:19:28.500 somehow?
00:19:28.940 So I posted it.
00:19:29.860 I put it in my,
00:19:31.440 on a post,
00:19:31.940 an actual post that I made
00:19:33.060 and then I talked about it
00:19:33.960 on stage of the show
00:19:34.940 and hundreds of people
00:19:36.780 went to pizza wine disco
00:19:38.180 right at 9 p.m.
00:19:39.920 or like whatever
00:19:41.000 the show was over
00:19:41.900 and we're just like,
00:19:43.760 where the hell has been?
00:19:44.640 What the hell is this shit?
00:19:45.780 We're just at the keg
00:19:46.960 and it's like a nightclub
00:19:48.480 for children basically.
00:19:50.080 Yeah.
00:19:50.280 And all my old fans
00:19:52.640 were like hobbled down there.
00:19:54.800 Where's Ben?
00:19:55.720 Why?
00:19:56.400 Oh,
00:19:56.600 the lights are so loud
00:19:57.880 and he's dark.
00:20:00.380 And people were messaging me
00:20:02.160 like,
00:20:02.380 where are you?
00:20:03.200 Why aren't you coming here?
00:20:04.840 And then I was like,
00:20:05.440 should I come early?
00:20:06.140 And they're like,
00:20:06.380 no,
00:20:06.560 no,
00:20:07.340 12,
00:20:07.720 15,
00:20:08.140 pick up.
00:20:10.060 So we're just at the keg
00:20:11.220 waiting.
00:20:11.900 We're standing,
00:20:12.520 having a smoke.
00:20:13.140 We watch a black guy
00:20:13.800 get arrested.
00:20:14.760 Oh yeah,
00:20:15.100 he got arrested.
00:20:15.780 He was running away
00:20:17.060 and he fell with his pants
00:20:18.600 at his ankles
00:20:19.200 and then got up
00:20:20.160 and then just kind of like
00:20:21.420 was like,
00:20:21.800 hi.
00:20:22.300 He was like following a girl
00:20:23.740 and then she called him short.
00:20:25.920 Yeah.
00:20:26.080 And then he crashed out
00:20:27.300 and tried to like
00:20:28.320 chase or something
00:20:29.300 and then the cops
00:20:30.840 chased him
00:20:31.640 and then he was getting away
00:20:32.720 but then his pants fell down
00:20:33.940 and he didn't have a belt
00:20:34.680 and then he fell
00:20:35.420 and then they got him
00:20:36.200 and then he was like
00:20:36.760 crashing up
00:20:37.400 after he was arrested.
00:20:38.560 Yeah,
00:20:39.060 he was stomping.
00:20:39.700 Getting carried away
00:20:40.560 being like,
00:20:41.040 I'm really going to get mad
00:20:42.500 and then the cop like
00:20:43.680 just,
00:20:44.180 you know.
00:20:44.560 Ari,
00:20:44.800 what race was he?
00:20:46.180 It's none of my business.
00:20:51.020 Almond?
00:20:51.300 He was black.
00:20:55.880 He was mixed.
00:20:57.940 He was black and Jewish.
00:20:59.480 It was Drake.
00:21:02.020 That's how Drake get arrested.
00:21:03.860 King Street.
00:21:04.840 How tall is Drake?
00:21:05.720 Drake's like over six feet, right?
00:21:06.940 Drake's got to be like six one.
00:21:08.440 Yeah.
00:21:08.740 I hope.
00:21:09.480 If he's not,
00:21:10.120 then.
00:21:10.460 That guy had a really bad night
00:21:11.620 so we watched that
00:21:12.380 and they're like,
00:21:12.780 alright,
00:21:13.060 let's have seven plates of calamari.
00:21:15.600 Really mediocre calamari.
00:21:17.520 The keg.
00:21:18.140 Shout out the keg.
00:21:18.840 Shout out the keg
00:21:19.560 for letting us.
00:21:21.360 We couldn't get a table
00:21:22.320 anywhere to go anywhere.
00:21:23.620 Yeah.
00:21:24.940 Then finally we get
00:21:25.780 to the after party.
00:21:26.760 It's basically,
00:21:27.320 it's dead.
00:21:28.620 Some of my fans were there
00:21:29.660 like maybe like 15
00:21:31.280 and then
00:21:33.760 they like
00:21:35.300 took forever
00:21:35.920 to set up the bottle.
00:21:37.400 I took pictures
00:21:38.300 with people.
00:21:38.820 That was like cool.
00:21:39.640 Like it was what it was supposed to be.
00:21:41.940 It's just,
00:21:42.420 there was,
00:21:42.820 should have.
00:21:43.500 You should have just
00:21:44.020 literally just gone after.
00:21:45.940 They should have told me
00:21:46.860 so I could have been like,
00:21:47.920 I'll be there at midnight
00:21:48.820 and then people would have
00:21:49.740 went and drank
00:21:50.620 and instead of just
00:21:51.620 ruined everybody's night.
00:21:53.220 Great show.
00:21:54.100 After party.
00:21:54.700 Very weird.
00:21:57.740 Yeah.
00:21:58.160 So it was like all my fans
00:21:59.300 and then like
00:21:59.900 a couple weird
00:22:01.540 like 19,
00:22:02.680 20 year olds
00:22:03.580 which is legal in Canada.
00:22:05.640 It's 19 year old
00:22:06.740 drinking age
00:22:07.720 where this is in Toronto
00:22:09.060 right now
00:22:09.440 at the grid studio
00:22:10.260 and
00:22:12.120 but it was weird
00:22:14.640 and then the guy goes,
00:22:15.680 can you go on the mic?
00:22:16.860 It wasn't supposed to be
00:22:17.560 in my contract.
00:22:18.500 I even asked my manager
00:22:19.300 after he's like,
00:22:19.840 that wasn't in the contract.
00:22:20.740 They weren't supposed
00:22:21.140 to ask you to do that
00:22:21.980 but the guy really wanted it
00:22:23.980 and I was like,
00:22:24.480 I don't,
00:22:24.980 at first I was like,
00:22:25.660 I don't think it's the contract.
00:22:26.860 I don't want to do it.
00:22:27.680 I don't,
00:22:28.000 like it's a nightclub.
00:22:28.840 Why do I need to be on a mic?
00:22:30.380 I thought he had a stage
00:22:31.420 and shit ready
00:22:31.940 but then he's like,
00:22:32.460 no,
00:22:32.580 you can do it
00:22:33.000 from like the DJ booth
00:22:34.180 or like from your booth
00:22:35.360 or the bottle booth service booth.
00:22:38.140 So I was like,
00:22:38.700 fine,
00:22:38.920 I'll do it
00:22:39.260 and then maybe we were there
00:22:40.640 for like 45 minutes
00:22:42.400 and he's like,
00:22:42.960 okay,
00:22:43.320 you want to do it?
00:22:44.140 I'm like,
00:22:44.380 yeah,
00:22:44.520 sure.
00:22:45.520 And then I just made jokes
00:22:47.620 about like all the ugly girls
00:22:49.800 at the club
00:22:50.380 and that's not what you said.
00:22:52.580 Time to play some music
00:22:53.440 that's not gay.
00:22:54.800 Okay,
00:22:55.100 I said that.
00:22:56.040 There was like,
00:22:56.360 well,
00:22:56.480 they were playing Dancing Queen.
00:22:57.680 There was like a bunch of women dancing
00:22:59.200 and you were like,
00:23:00.020 there's a lot of women here.
00:23:01.800 Three of them are beautiful.
00:23:02.940 They're not even dancing
00:23:03.720 and then every woman
00:23:04.820 that was dancing
00:23:05.480 slowly stepped down
00:23:07.000 off the table.
00:23:07.660 No,
00:23:07.740 I was like,
00:23:08.120 I was like,
00:23:08.540 a lot of beautiful women
00:23:09.420 in the house.
00:23:10.560 Like,
00:23:10.700 you know,
00:23:11.120 everybody was like,
00:23:12.480 woo.
00:23:13.140 Then I was like,
00:23:14.080 but none of them are dancing.
00:23:15.680 None of them.
00:23:16.100 I don't see any of them
00:23:16.720 and that was all,
00:23:17.440 that was all the women.
00:23:18.700 They were,
00:23:18.960 they were all standing dancing
00:23:20.700 and so they were all very ashamed
00:23:23.500 and then I basically said,
00:23:24.920 no,
00:23:25.080 no,
00:23:25.240 I'm just kidding.
00:23:26.140 Then you said,
00:23:26.820 ladies,
00:23:26.860 you look great.
00:23:27.300 They were like,
00:23:27.760 it's really hard
00:23:28.800 being a receptionist,
00:23:29.920 sweetheart.
00:23:30.440 That's what you said,
00:23:31.140 that.
00:23:31.540 I was like,
00:23:31.900 who here had a tough week
00:23:33.360 is ready to have some drinks
00:23:35.280 and then all the girls
00:23:35.880 were like,
00:23:36.240 woo.
00:23:36.760 Then I'm like,
00:23:37.640 it's tough being a receptionist.
00:23:38.720 Then you called every guy
00:23:39.600 a date rapist.
00:23:41.560 Yeah.
00:23:42.360 No,
00:23:42.620 it was funny.
00:23:44.720 Cleared out the room.
00:23:46.120 Cleared the room pretty good.
00:23:47.340 I've never seen anyone
00:23:48.120 walk a nightclub.
00:23:49.040 It was impressive.
00:23:50.620 I felt good.
00:23:51.620 I gotta admit,
00:23:53.400 I felt really good.
00:23:55.460 Oh yeah,
00:23:56.000 and then those two girls
00:23:56.900 were screaming at us
00:23:57.840 and the one girl,
00:23:58.720 oh,
00:23:58.940 at the end,
00:23:59.560 she came right up to the booth
00:24:00.560 and was like,
00:24:01.300 fuck you,
00:24:02.280 fuck you.
00:24:03.440 And I was like,
00:24:04.380 it's humor.
00:24:05.180 It's just,
00:24:05.800 like,
00:24:06.060 I'm just here,
00:24:06.920 it's funny.
00:24:07.980 You're gonna have to learn humor,
00:24:09.240 you know,
00:24:09.720 when the Indians take over
00:24:10.900 because they're funny
00:24:12.380 or something.
00:24:13.140 And then her boyfriend
00:24:14.940 or the guy she was with
00:24:15.920 was Indian.
00:24:16.980 And then he found it funny
00:24:18.400 and she got mad
00:24:19.300 that he thought it was funny,
00:24:20.420 even though he's Indian.
00:24:21.400 Yeah.
00:24:21.880 And then she left him there.
00:24:23.500 So then we got him a drink
00:24:24.680 and then he was basically like,
00:24:25.760 I fucking love Trump,
00:24:26.880 whatever.
00:24:29.420 That's the thing.
00:24:30.040 I'm not racist at all.
00:24:31.000 I'm culturist.
00:24:33.500 You know?
00:24:34.300 Okay,
00:24:34.580 what race,
00:24:35.180 religion,
00:24:35.580 but if you vote for Trump,
00:24:38.940 it's more than just,
00:24:41.580 don't wear a little weird outfit.
00:24:44.840 Just wear this normal T-shirt,
00:24:47.120 jeans,
00:24:48.180 shoes,
00:24:48.680 nothing else.
00:24:49.540 Nothing on your head,
00:24:51.280 no head stuff.
00:24:54.280 Then I'm okay with you.
00:24:55.580 You know?
00:24:55.860 If I see a person
00:24:56.560 with,
00:24:56.820 they start putting things on,
00:24:58.240 they start.
00:25:02.040 What?
00:25:02.920 What?
00:25:05.580 Is that racist?
00:25:07.900 Or is that,
00:25:08.300 like,
00:25:08.640 that's not a race.
00:25:09.860 Putting something on your head
00:25:10.620 is not a race.
00:25:13.040 No.
00:25:14.980 What is the word for that?
00:25:16.420 I'm just curious.
00:25:16.800 Like,
00:25:17.060 I'm genuinely being serious.
00:25:19.020 Like,
00:25:19.260 look that up,
00:25:19.800 are you?
00:25:20.080 And I honestly,
00:25:20.820 I'm not even against it.
00:25:21.960 I just noticed that it's different
00:25:23.580 and it's not necessary.
00:25:26.200 I don't know if it's necessary.
00:25:29.060 To have a religion?
00:25:30.340 Like,
00:25:30.580 well,
00:25:30.840 it's,
00:25:31.160 you know,
00:25:32.080 look how white people
00:25:33.080 dressed a hundred years ago
00:25:34.300 or two hundred years ago.
00:25:36.320 You know what I'm saying?
00:25:36.920 Like,
00:25:38.940 it's a modern country.
00:25:42.100 It's supposed to be.
00:25:43.780 Dress,
00:25:44.120 look,
00:25:44.300 you guys are dressed good.
00:25:45.480 Everybody here is dressed good.
00:25:48.620 Except for this.
00:25:52.780 Cultural chauvinism.
00:25:55.020 Okay,
00:25:55.500 there.
00:25:55.640 I'm a cultural chauvinist.
00:25:57.580 That sounds a lot better
00:25:59.180 than racist.
00:26:00.380 Yeah.
00:26:00.840 Rebrand.
00:26:01.240 That's not a bad
00:26:02.600 title for a,
00:26:04.840 for a special.
00:26:05.720 Cultural chauvinist?
00:26:08.560 Chauvinist pig.
00:26:09.720 What is chauvinism?
00:26:10.740 It's just like arrogance?
00:26:13.280 I mean.
00:26:13.580 All right,
00:26:13.820 get it back out.
00:26:14.480 Get the phone back out.
00:26:21.140 This guy's got the nicest phone.
00:26:23.560 Doesn't want to use it.
00:26:26.400 Chauvinism.
00:26:26.760 Someone who shows
00:26:31.980 excessive
00:26:32.600 or prejudiced
00:26:33.520 loyalty
00:26:34.040 or support
00:26:34.960 for their own
00:26:35.660 group.
00:26:37.880 That's what chauvinism is?
00:26:40.080 Yeah.
00:26:40.320 So that is basically racism.
00:26:44.280 So basically.
00:26:45.700 Basically,
00:26:46.200 you're racist.
00:26:47.180 Look.
00:26:48.280 Chauvinist,
00:26:48.780 racist.
00:26:50.380 Show business.
00:26:51.200 You ever have a thesaurus
00:26:52.260 and just look up racist?
00:26:54.760 Let's see what I can see.
00:26:55.240 What am I?
00:26:55.860 What am I really?
00:26:56.760 It's a fucking synonym
00:26:57.700 for racist.
00:26:58.540 Yeah.
00:26:59.080 All right.
00:26:59.740 Synonyms for racism.
00:27:01.700 Racist.
00:27:03.040 I'm curious.
00:27:03.620 Chauvinist.
00:27:04.220 Chauvinist.
00:27:05.120 Derek Chauvin.
00:27:05.940 Chauvinism.
00:27:06.720 Oh.
00:27:07.380 Oh.
00:27:09.040 It's all connected.
00:27:09.840 I'm a chauvinist.
00:27:11.220 Oh.
00:27:11.620 Jesus Christ.
00:27:13.300 That's so bad.
00:27:15.220 I'm not racist.
00:27:16.360 I just think Derek Chauvin
00:27:17.260 is the best guy
00:27:18.380 I've ever heard.
00:27:18.840 I'm a chauvinist.
00:27:19.900 I'm just one of the Kamala Harris
00:27:21.140 so it's when my Derek Chauvin
00:27:22.300 should be free shit.
00:27:23.200 What's wrong?
00:27:24.640 I can't have an opinion?
00:27:25.920 I can't have an opinion.
00:27:27.580 It would have been interesting
00:27:28.740 to ask them a question
00:27:29.760 about Charlie Kirk.
00:27:31.380 I wanted to ask
00:27:32.280 if she thinks Donald Trump
00:27:33.460 sucked off Bill Clinton.
00:27:35.400 I would have asked that
00:27:36.420 in front of all the kids.
00:27:37.640 Just.
00:27:38.440 They should know.
00:27:39.220 They should be.
00:27:39.740 You guys should know.
00:27:40.540 Kamala.
00:27:40.560 Now she would have been like
00:27:41.560 I like this question.
00:27:43.040 She'd probably be like
00:27:43.880 No.
00:27:46.120 She'd probably be like
00:27:47.240 kill this man on the spot.
00:27:50.240 Sniper.
00:27:51.380 Charlie Kirk.
00:27:52.760 Okay.
00:27:52.940 What's the synonyms for racists?
00:27:54.000 Hit us with it.
00:27:54.520 Hit us, bro.
00:27:55.920 Prejudice.
00:27:57.260 Discrimination.
00:28:00.520 Bias.
00:28:02.340 Bigotry.
00:28:04.000 Intolerance.
00:28:04.820 Closer to the mic.
00:28:05.520 Do it again.
00:28:06.680 Hatred.
00:28:09.980 Animus.
00:28:12.280 Xenophobia.
00:28:12.940 Mbancas is an animus.
00:28:15.360 He's a fucking animus.
00:28:16.780 He goes everywhere.
00:28:17.720 All he says is animus.
00:28:19.160 Animus statements.
00:28:23.000 Segregationism.
00:28:25.480 Apartheid.
00:28:27.620 Supremacy.
00:28:30.680 Ethnocentrism.
00:28:31.900 Like that one.
00:28:33.680 It's a rare one.
00:28:35.380 Rare Pokemon card.
00:28:37.320 Holographic.
00:28:38.560 Israel really is
00:28:39.500 the holographic card.
00:28:40.680 That's why everybody hates him.
00:28:41.880 It's like.
00:28:42.940 They're like the
00:28:43.660 ultra holographic
00:28:45.280 squirtle.
00:28:47.920 What's
00:28:48.400 squirtle's final form?
00:28:50.100 Blastoise?
00:28:50.720 Yeah.
00:28:51.280 That's what Israel is.
00:28:51.980 Israel's of holographic
00:28:53.140 blastoise.
00:28:53.640 Just a country surrounded
00:28:54.600 by Arabs.
00:28:56.560 Yo, this is the most
00:28:57.420 coveted piece of land
00:28:58.740 on earth.
00:28:59.200 Surrounded by shit.
00:29:00.860 Everyone wants them dead.
00:29:02.720 You're jealous of that.
00:29:04.440 I live in the projects.
00:29:05.620 That's what Israel is.
00:29:06.500 It's just a guy that lives
00:29:07.360 in the projects
00:29:07.980 but he has like a nice chain.
00:29:10.040 His boy's the plug.
00:29:10.940 Boy's Donald Trump.
00:29:13.800 He's just like,
00:29:14.240 yo, bro, like,
00:29:15.060 I'll get you back, like,
00:29:16.940 to school.
00:29:18.600 That's all it is.
00:29:19.520 What do you mean
00:29:19.860 it's a shiny Pokemon?
00:29:21.040 That's all it is.
00:29:21.780 I've, uh,
00:29:22.500 diminished
00:29:23.920 all Jewish existence
00:29:25.380 to brawl.
00:29:27.600 That's good.
00:29:30.160 Grow up on Dovercourt.
00:29:31.140 What do you think, Ari?
00:29:37.100 I'm mentally still in my nap.
00:29:41.760 I mean, that's like
00:29:43.100 an argument for
00:29:44.120 euthanasia?
00:29:45.600 I mean, I don't know
00:29:46.420 what that is.
00:29:47.640 You're not making Jews
00:29:48.400 look good right now, Ari.
00:29:49.460 You're 100% full bread.
00:29:50.540 Jews aren't supposed
00:29:51.060 to be tired.
00:29:52.480 They're not supposed
00:29:52.860 to know that
00:29:53.380 Jews never sleep.
00:29:55.060 They're not supposed
00:29:55.540 to know that you're human.
00:29:56.820 Jews sleep upside down,
00:29:57.840 but
00:29:57.960 like bats.
00:30:01.040 They're like bats.
00:30:05.400 Sleep in a coffin,
00:30:06.460 sleep in a tunnel.
00:30:09.880 Do you think,
00:30:13.300 are you anti-Semitic?
00:30:15.700 Some days.
00:30:18.500 But you're Jewish.
00:30:20.520 Yeah.
00:30:22.100 So what's,
00:30:22.940 Ari hates Jews
00:30:23.800 because he's afraid
00:30:24.660 Jews are going to cause
00:30:25.680 Jews to get
00:30:26.520 wiped out.
00:30:28.200 He's always afraid
00:30:28.940 that every day
00:30:29.820 he's just,
00:30:30.260 oh, there's going to be,
00:30:31.580 they're coming for us.
00:30:32.620 All right.
00:30:32.940 So you're a Republican.
00:30:34.500 No.
00:30:35.860 You're a Democrat.
00:30:36.760 No.
00:30:38.040 You're a nothing crap.
00:30:39.220 Yeah.
00:30:39.720 He's Jewish.
00:30:40.760 That's,
00:30:41.060 I do find the most,
00:30:43.120 like most,
00:30:43.820 like a lot of Americans
00:30:44.660 just don't vote.
00:30:46.420 Yeah, for sure.
00:30:48.020 There's 400 million of them.
00:30:49.800 Definitely not everyone's voting.
00:30:51.900 It's kind of weird though.
00:30:53.260 Do you vote, Ari?
00:30:54.420 I've never voted for president.
00:30:55.820 I voted in like local elections.
00:30:58.280 For what?
00:30:59.300 That's so funny.
00:31:01.500 I don't know why
00:31:01.960 that seems very.
00:31:03.100 It's just because Americans
00:31:04.340 go to other countries
00:31:05.940 to bring democracy
00:31:07.340 to them,
00:31:08.240 to give people
00:31:08.920 the right to vote
00:31:09.580 and then them themselves
00:31:10.600 are like,
00:31:10.980 honestly,
00:31:11.420 I never know what day it is.
00:31:13.060 I'm just tired all the time.
00:31:14.800 I don't,
00:31:15.100 I never voted.
00:31:15.960 I, you know,
00:31:16.820 I voted for a city council
00:31:17.940 in 2003,
00:31:19.660 but crazy.
00:31:21.940 Vote.
00:31:22.800 It's your right.
00:31:23.460 There's people around the world
00:31:24.740 who don't have that right.
00:31:25.600 That's your right.
00:31:26.100 Okay.
00:31:30.780 I mean,
00:31:31.600 I voted
00:31:32.360 here
00:31:33.660 for prime minister,
00:31:36.260 but you don't actually vote
00:31:37.180 for prime minister.
00:31:39.420 It's not like America
00:31:40.380 where you check like
00:31:41.200 Donald Trump,
00:31:42.360 Kamala Harris.
00:31:42.980 You don't do that.
00:31:44.920 What do you do?
00:31:46.380 You vote for the,
00:31:47.920 it sucks.
00:31:49.660 It's,
00:31:50.200 yeah.
00:31:50.500 You vote for like an MP
00:31:51.760 that then gets a seat
00:31:53.160 in parliament
00:31:54.040 and then whoever
00:31:54.780 has the most seats
00:31:55.820 then becomes
00:31:56.660 the leading party.
00:31:58.820 And then the prime minister
00:32:00.380 is the leader
00:32:01.020 of that party.
00:32:01.980 So like Pierre Polyev
00:32:02.980 was the leader
00:32:03.460 of the conservatives
00:32:04.900 and then the opposition
00:32:05.900 is Mark Carney.
00:32:06.260 Except didn't Pierre Polyev
00:32:07.240 lose and then another guy
00:32:08.860 just gave up
00:32:09.660 who did win
00:32:10.600 gave his seat to him?
00:32:12.120 I think so.
00:32:13.180 Yeah, in Alberta.
00:32:14.300 Something like that.
00:32:14.920 He lost in his own riding
00:32:16.080 in Carlton
00:32:16.820 out of Ottawa.
00:32:19.340 I love Canada though.
00:32:20.820 Fucking Ottawa, buddy.
00:32:22.300 I love Canada.
00:32:24.260 But,
00:32:24.900 I love Kamala.
00:32:25.660 And what I think
00:32:26.400 that a lot of even my fans
00:32:27.560 were like,
00:32:27.860 I hate Canada now.
00:32:29.020 I hate it here.
00:32:29.760 It's like,
00:32:30.060 you don't hate it here.
00:32:30.920 You don't hate Canada.
00:32:32.060 You just don't like
00:32:33.340 Indian people.
00:32:37.160 Just don't like
00:32:38.000 people that aren't white.
00:32:41.240 That is the propaganda.
00:32:43.440 They bring,
00:32:44.180 they're human propaganda.
00:32:45.220 I think I just discovered
00:32:49.300 like a new slur
00:32:50.260 is just calling
00:32:51.040 a migrant propaganda.
00:32:52.340 You're propaganda.
00:32:53.760 You being here.
00:32:55.700 In some ways
00:32:56.600 because it creates
00:32:57.660 that anger
00:32:58.900 and division
00:32:59.540 that it would,
00:33:01.600 it would do that anywhere.
00:33:03.240 I mean,
00:33:03.500 but the argument is that,
00:33:04.860 oh, well,
00:33:05.140 white people went
00:33:05.800 to other countries
00:33:06.560 so now it's,
00:33:08.140 and fucked them up
00:33:08.880 so now we have to let
00:33:09.840 all them come
00:33:10.580 and fuck up our country.
00:33:12.820 Right?
00:33:13.220 That's the argument.
00:33:15.480 I don't think
00:33:16.220 they phrase it like that.
00:33:18.160 Yeah,
00:33:18.460 Kamala,
00:33:19.200 that's what she said.
00:33:20.220 She's like,
00:33:20.700 look,
00:33:20.940 white people
00:33:21.320 fucked this shit up
00:33:22.080 so we're bringing
00:33:22.540 a bunch of fucking guys
00:33:23.620 here to fuck this shit up.
00:33:26.680 I don't know.
00:33:27.640 I'm not saying
00:33:28.080 that's the way I see it
00:33:28.820 but that's the way
00:33:29.380 that I described it
00:33:30.200 just now.
00:33:31.080 But,
00:33:31.880 look,
00:33:33.460 these people are animals
00:33:34.240 on the streets.
00:33:36.580 Animus.
00:33:38.080 The animus.
00:33:39.520 The racists.
00:33:40.700 Isn't that what
00:33:41.200 the machinist called
00:33:42.900 in Assassin's Creed
00:33:43.820 that sends you back
00:33:44.680 in time to live
00:33:45.420 your ancestor's life?
00:33:46.480 The animus?
00:33:48.420 I think so.
00:33:51.880 What the fuck?
00:33:53.140 They gotta make
00:33:53.640 an Assassin's Creed
00:33:54.440 where it's like
00:33:54.900 a Jew goes back
00:33:55.780 and that's just like
00:33:56.460 the worst.
00:33:56.780 But Canada is a really
00:33:57.600 great place to live
00:33:58.640 still, I think.
00:34:00.300 And so is America.
00:34:01.540 But Canada has,
00:34:03.720 it's more chill vibe.
00:34:05.700 Mm-hmm.
00:34:06.740 America's more like
00:34:07.600 scary vibes.
00:34:08.920 For us,
00:34:09.780 I think.
00:34:11.700 Ari,
00:34:11.920 do you ever feel?
00:34:13.720 Ari's the one
00:34:14.260 that made me scared.
00:34:15.280 I mean,
00:34:15.500 he hit a deer
00:34:16.220 in Pottstown
00:34:17.480 which was terrible.
00:34:18.500 Allegedly.
00:34:19.560 Yeah,
00:34:19.960 but the deer
00:34:20.400 was wearing a kefir.
00:34:21.200 Allegedly.
00:34:23.440 Yeah.
00:34:24.120 He treated it
00:34:24.840 like a Palestinian
00:34:25.420 protester.
00:34:26.340 Yeah.
00:34:28.120 He was like,
00:34:28.820 break,
00:34:29.200 but not really.
00:34:30.660 I was breaking.
00:34:31.620 I was breaking.
00:34:32.520 Officer.
00:34:33.240 This old Jewish man
00:34:33.920 in Florida
00:34:34.320 ran over
00:34:34.900 Greta Thunberg
00:34:36.340 and all her friends
00:34:37.080 been mean to.
00:34:38.900 Allegedly.
00:34:39.780 No,
00:34:42.000 but you're,
00:34:42.920 you always freak me out
00:34:45.860 that New York's like,
00:34:47.120 you worry that
00:34:48.120 something would happen
00:34:48.840 because it's New York.
00:34:49.800 That's where it would happen.
00:34:52.120 It does feel like that.
00:34:53.300 It's like,
00:34:53.500 if I got stabbed here,
00:34:54.380 it wouldn't be that crazy.
00:34:55.700 Like,
00:34:55.800 if somebody just,
00:34:56.380 yeah,
00:34:56.700 stabbed New York,
00:34:57.660 yeah.
00:34:59.220 Some CEO was shot
00:35:00.400 in the head there.
00:35:01.020 Like,
00:35:01.200 it's crazy.
00:35:01.840 Mm-hmm.
00:35:02.600 It is freaky.
00:35:03.220 Whereas if you're like
00:35:05.200 in Kitchener,
00:35:05.840 Ontario,
00:35:06.520 you're like,
00:35:06.860 well,
00:35:07.080 you know,
00:35:07.400 oh,
00:35:07.580 fuck,
00:35:07.800 buddy,
00:35:08.060 it's pretty peaceful.
00:35:09.240 There's too many
00:35:09.700 fucking Indians,
00:35:10.500 you know what I mean?
00:35:12.220 Fucking nobody,
00:35:13.100 nothing ever happens,
00:35:14.180 buddy.
00:35:15.100 Couple break-ins.
00:35:16.100 They have a lot of break-ins here.
00:35:17.400 That's the big thing.
00:35:18.280 Mm-hmm.
00:35:19.040 You're not allowed to
00:35:19.880 defend your own home
00:35:21.020 in Canada.
00:35:22.140 You're supposed to,
00:35:22.860 like,
00:35:22.980 hide or leave
00:35:23.840 and call the police.
00:35:24.660 We don't have,
00:35:25.140 like,
00:35:25.220 a standard ground law
00:35:26.320 at all.
00:35:27.880 That's crazy.
00:35:28.680 Yeah,
00:35:29.100 because recently
00:35:30.040 somebody broke into
00:35:30.880 someone's home in Alberta
00:35:31.840 and he,
00:35:32.260 like,
00:35:32.560 hit the guy
00:35:33.100 with a baseball bat
00:35:33.940 or something
00:35:34.360 and then he got
00:35:35.000 charged with assault.
00:35:37.600 Damn.
00:35:38.540 That sucks.
00:35:40.060 Booped America.
00:35:42.100 Ari Shield.
00:35:42.980 Damn.
00:35:43.640 That sucks.
00:35:45.200 Damn.
00:35:45.660 That's wild.
00:35:46.980 I've only had Ari
00:35:47.960 on a couple podcasts
00:35:48.800 where he was up to it,
00:35:49.940 you know?
00:35:51.640 Sometimes.
00:35:52.840 It's because you took him
00:35:53.420 to Kamala Harris
00:35:54.180 and now I feel like
00:35:54.980 he is low-key liberal.
00:35:56.840 I feel like you.
00:35:57.100 I know.
00:35:57.520 I feel like he,
00:35:58.040 he fucking was listening
00:35:59.140 to that gobbledy goop
00:36:00.420 and loving it.
00:36:01.180 He was like,
00:36:01.640 oh.
00:36:02.720 No,
00:36:03.160 she didn't say anything
00:36:04.560 of,
00:36:05.160 she didn't say anything wrong
00:36:06.440 but she also didn't say anything.
00:36:08.400 Yeah,
00:36:08.700 she didn't really say anything.
00:36:09.580 That's what I mean.
00:36:10.260 She did say some things wrong.
00:36:11.720 She said that.
00:36:12.220 Like what?
00:36:13.160 She said that diversity,
00:36:14.660 equity,
00:36:14.900 and inclusion
00:36:15.840 is meant to bring dignity
00:36:18.440 and equity
00:36:19.580 is meant to bring dignity
00:36:21.540 to people
00:36:22.080 and when she said that
00:36:23.640 and people clapped for it,
00:36:25.400 some people didn't clap for it
00:36:26.600 because I think other people
00:36:27.480 cued in that
00:36:28.420 she's basically saying that
00:36:30.100 you know,
00:36:31.160 all the black people
00:36:32.960 and brown
00:36:34.100 and all of the non-white people,
00:36:37.440 you know,
00:36:37.760 you have no dignity
00:36:38.980 in your life
00:36:40.160 so we got to give you dignity
00:36:41.880 by giving you these fake roles
00:36:44.160 and companies
00:36:44.780 and jumping over
00:36:46.200 all these other people
00:36:47.380 who are more qualified
00:36:48.260 because,
00:36:48.880 and that's dignity.
00:36:50.060 That's not dignity.
00:36:50.780 That's,
00:36:51.420 that's,
00:36:52.500 um,
00:36:53.440 supremacy.
00:36:54.600 I mean,
00:36:55.820 if they were doing that
00:36:56.660 for white people
00:36:57.160 which apparently
00:36:57.760 that's what was happening before
00:36:58.940 is white people
00:36:59.520 were being prioritized,
00:37:00.740 maybe in places
00:37:02.460 where the boss was white,
00:37:04.340 is that discrimination?
00:37:07.020 What about all the places
00:37:08.080 where the boss isn't white?
00:37:09.040 How many times
00:37:09.600 are they hiring white people?
00:37:11.440 That's okay.
00:37:12.620 It's okay to be in,
00:37:13.740 you know,
00:37:14.220 whatever other race
00:37:16.000 and hire only people
00:37:17.240 of that race
00:37:17.980 and people will be like,
00:37:19.240 yeah,
00:37:19.420 it's a Chinese company,
00:37:20.740 everybody's Chinese
00:37:21.400 and that makes,
00:37:22.440 maybe one way,
00:37:24.160 ooh,
00:37:25.160 nobody cares,
00:37:26.520 right?
00:37:26.940 So,
00:37:28.660 why is,
00:37:29.540 why is,
00:37:30.720 I,
00:37:30.920 that's what I think is wrong
00:37:31.880 is I don't think people
00:37:34.060 are undignified
00:37:36.380 because of their race
00:37:37.420 at all
00:37:38.620 or even their religion
00:37:40.140 even though what I said about,
00:37:41.520 I don't think that's undignified.
00:37:43.240 Like,
00:37:43.320 I don't think,
00:37:43.860 you have no dignity
00:37:44.920 that that's,
00:37:46.200 that's your own problem.
00:37:47.680 That's not society's problem
00:37:48.880 in my,
00:37:49.320 in my point of view.
00:37:51.420 You know,
00:37:52.500 like dignity is like
00:37:53.740 you're on a dialysis machine
00:37:55.560 and you're shitting in a bag.
00:37:56.760 That,
00:37:56.960 that's,
00:37:57.460 I don't have any dignity.
00:37:58.840 You know,
00:37:59.540 being like,
00:38:00.160 oh,
00:38:00.340 I didn't get the job.
00:38:01.920 Like,
00:38:02.380 that's not,
00:38:02.920 that's not no dignity.
00:38:04.140 I'm sorry,
00:38:04.580 it's not.
00:38:06.660 Because
00:38:07.060 in the 80s and 90s,
00:38:09.040 there was lots of
00:38:09.920 people who weren't white
00:38:11.620 succeeding
00:38:12.300 in the 70s
00:38:13.720 and the 60s
00:38:14.680 for that matter.
00:38:15.300 So,
00:38:15.980 and the 50s,
00:38:16.540 and the 50s,
00:38:16.980 and the 40s,
00:38:17.740 the 1800s.
00:38:20.420 There is a cutoff.
00:38:21.840 1765.
00:38:22.640 I mean,
00:38:22.900 everyone had a job.
00:38:24.660 Didn't get paid that great,
00:38:25.880 but you were working.
00:38:27.540 Look,
00:38:27.840 no,
00:38:27.960 I know what you mean.
00:38:28.640 I wouldn't feel,
00:38:29.280 I wouldn't feel very dignified
00:38:30.780 if it was like,
00:38:31.380 look,
00:38:31.960 you're Amin,
00:38:32.540 you're Iranian,
00:38:33.140 you're clearly too retarded
00:38:34.180 to get hired.
00:38:34.800 So,
00:38:35.280 we're going to like,
00:38:36.320 just get you in here.
00:38:37.120 I don't treat you
00:38:37.800 like a different,
00:38:39.840 like,
00:38:40.540 do I?
00:38:41.980 Maybe a little.
00:38:45.980 No.
00:38:50.240 That would be like if,
00:38:51.120 like Alex DeWitt,
00:38:52.660 and I was just like,
00:38:53.300 you know what,
00:38:53.800 look,
00:38:54.480 sorry,
00:38:54.800 I'm in,
00:38:55.120 this guy's white.
00:38:57.120 I'm going to hang out with him.
00:38:58.360 Oh,
00:38:58.560 yeah.
00:39:00.500 You turn into Batman.
00:39:01.840 Bad hang.
00:39:02.280 When you get,
00:39:03.520 you lost your dignity
00:39:04.360 and you start going,
00:39:05.300 oh,
00:39:06.040 yeah,
00:39:06.640 I am Batman.
00:39:08.380 I am Batman,
00:39:09.160 dude.
00:39:11.000 We should have dressed up as,
00:39:13.480 I should have showed up
00:39:14.340 to Kamala Harris
00:39:15.060 dressed up like Batman.
00:39:16.600 They wouldn't have been able
00:39:17.460 to stop me.
00:39:18.000 I'd be like,
00:39:18.340 look,
00:39:18.480 I identify as fucking Batman,
00:39:20.100 dude.
00:39:21.020 I'm fucking Bruce Wayne.
00:39:22.060 Let me in.
00:39:24.440 That's how you know
00:39:24.800 the pod's going good
00:39:25.580 when the,
00:39:25.960 when the guy goes up.
00:39:27.540 The only guy listening to it
00:39:28.340 is like,
00:39:28.700 Jesus Christ.
00:39:30.500 Think about it now.
00:39:31.660 Mm-hmm.
00:39:32.280 I'm glad we had
00:39:35.040 three,
00:39:35.520 three people.
00:39:36.200 I'm glad you missed your flight
00:39:37.400 and booked another flight
00:39:38.840 and did all that
00:39:41.260 just to,
00:39:41.900 just to stare at us.
00:39:46.760 Are you like,
00:39:47.880 is your brain off?
00:39:49.600 No,
00:39:50.320 it's on.
00:39:51.580 What do you want to talk about?
00:39:53.380 I want to talk about
00:39:53.960 the children's orchestra
00:39:54.940 we went to.
00:39:55.740 Oh,
00:39:55.880 yeah.
00:39:56.320 We saw Ben's dad
00:39:57.440 do his job
00:39:58.300 playing a violin.
00:39:59.000 We should probably talk about
00:39:59.580 something possible.
00:39:59.980 It was beautiful.
00:40:01.020 I want you guys to carry.
00:40:01.980 I don't want to carry.
00:40:03.040 Oh,
00:40:03.260 yeah.
00:40:03.360 The banker show
00:40:04.060 where his openers
00:40:04.820 do the whole show.
00:40:05.880 Yeah,
00:40:06.260 that's every guy's podcast.
00:40:08.720 No,
00:40:09.020 it's not.
00:40:09.780 Matt and Shane
00:40:10.300 where it's La Mer
00:40:10.940 and Gardini.
00:40:16.520 Cut that part out.
00:40:17.740 The Joe Rogan experience
00:40:18.700 where
00:40:19.000 it is that.
00:40:21.960 Is it?
00:40:23.040 Have you watched it?
00:40:24.340 Have I watched?
00:40:24.920 No.
00:40:26.060 Shane doesn't talk that much.
00:40:27.340 Take it away.
00:40:32.560 And it's the
00:40:33.400 Amon and Ari podcast.
00:40:35.080 Go.
00:40:36.020 Yeah,
00:40:36.220 we went to go see
00:40:36.920 Dad's Ben
00:40:38.260 play in the
00:40:38.920 children's orchestra
00:40:39.760 which was kind of funny
00:40:40.700 from Dad's Ben.
00:40:43.240 Oh,
00:40:43.680 sorry,
00:40:44.000 man.
00:40:44.240 Please.
00:40:44.580 Dad's Ben over there.
00:40:47.440 Classic.
00:40:48.020 Classic bit.
00:40:49.960 Prefer you actually
00:40:50.920 said things like that
00:40:51.740 more often
00:40:52.140 so I could
00:40:52.600 do the easy
00:40:53.580 two words
00:40:56.180 that don't make sense
00:40:56.860 backwards.
00:40:58.520 Anyway,
00:40:58.760 so we went to see
00:40:59.320 Dad's Ben.
00:41:01.300 No,
00:41:01.800 please leave it to Ari.
00:41:03.140 Make fun of the guy
00:41:03.940 that's been contributing
00:41:04.800 that's been helping
00:41:05.880 carry this.
00:41:07.720 Please make me feel
00:41:08.800 uncomfortable.
00:41:09.680 Every podcast
00:41:11.120 is just
00:41:11.760 Why the fuck
00:41:11.980 are we doing
00:41:12.320 a podcast?
00:41:13.940 What are friends
00:41:14.740 or employees?
00:41:15.640 Every studio,
00:41:16.480 it was $900.
00:41:17.660 Every time we
00:41:18.300 drive to do the podcast
00:41:19.380 we're like laughing
00:41:20.380 and then Ben's like
00:41:21.000 shut the fuck up.
00:41:21.760 We're doing a
00:41:22.160 shut up.
00:41:22.900 We're gonna have to
00:41:23.700 say this in a minute
00:41:24.540 and then we're just
00:41:26.300 like oh yeah
00:41:26.720 shit I forgot
00:41:27.320 we're not actually
00:41:27.940 really.
00:41:28.680 But then we end up
00:41:29.380 talking and then
00:41:30.020 we do get to the
00:41:30.660 podcast and we're
00:41:31.380 like listen he had
00:41:33.040 to be the fucking
00:41:33.620 guy.
00:41:36.300 We gotta just
00:41:37.040 maybe just have to
00:41:37.760 have like mics
00:41:38.900 just like at all
00:41:40.960 times.
00:41:41.580 Yeah.
00:41:42.460 Laughed up 24
00:41:43.240 7.
00:41:44.080 AZ.
00:41:45.880 Yeah where is
00:41:46.460 AZ?
00:41:48.360 He's in Z.
00:41:50.180 He's in Zip
00:41:51.080 Zap.
00:41:52.900 Oh he's at
00:41:53.720 Skankfest.
00:41:54.480 But no we
00:41:54.840 went to see your
00:41:55.360 dad playing the
00:41:56.020 children's orchestra.
00:41:57.280 Well it wasn't the
00:41:57.840 children's orchestra
00:41:58.460 it was the Toronto
00:41:59.060 Symphony playing for
00:42:00.080 children.
00:42:02.060 Yeah.
00:42:03.320 But it was funny
00:42:04.180 because I could tell
00:42:05.120 that like when he
00:42:06.600 was playing Pink
00:42:07.220 Panther and like
00:42:08.240 Mission Impossible
00:42:09.080 he thought it was
00:42:09.680 hack.
00:42:10.180 Like he probably
00:42:10.580 hated it.
00:42:11.160 He's like this
00:42:11.820 shit sucks.
00:42:13.160 It's like when
00:42:13.680 you're doing like
00:42:14.340 yucks and you're
00:42:15.060 like it's like it's
00:42:16.060 a comic when you're
00:42:16.800 doing like a private
00:42:17.620 gig and you're like
00:42:18.280 happy birthday.
00:42:19.160 Like it's like that.
00:42:20.260 Like I could tell it
00:42:20.900 was kind of like gigs
00:42:21.680 a gig tonight.
00:42:24.920 Like he was still
00:42:25.820 great.
00:42:26.360 Like it's not like
00:42:26.840 he half asses.
00:42:27.500 They all phoned it
00:42:28.340 in.
00:42:28.580 It was like trippy.
00:42:29.580 Well I think they
00:42:30.440 do that for kids
00:42:31.220 shows.
00:42:31.460 They're also tired
00:42:32.080 because they played
00:42:32.660 last night.
00:42:33.500 Yeah.
00:42:33.920 They play like every
00:42:34.840 night or they're
00:42:36.240 either playing or
00:42:36.960 rehearsing every
00:42:37.720 single day for the
00:42:38.680 entire like five
00:42:40.840 month season or
00:42:41.640 whatever.
00:42:42.060 He's I don't know
00:42:42.800 he's like 40 years
00:42:43.900 in.
00:42:45.160 He's 40 years old.
00:42:46.560 He's 40 years in.
00:42:47.500 No the best is I
00:42:50.140 think because I
00:42:50.720 noticed when the
00:42:52.060 audience applauds
00:42:53.640 the like the
00:42:54.500 musicians they tap
00:42:55.940 their foot.
00:42:56.540 They kind of tap
00:42:57.020 their foot.
00:42:57.860 And there was one
00:42:58.400 guy that stood up.
00:42:59.760 Yeah the bow they
00:43:00.660 like shake.
00:43:01.260 There was one guy
00:43:01.820 that stood up and he
00:43:02.500 did like a clarinet
00:43:03.260 solo and your dad
00:43:04.980 didn't raise his
00:43:05.940 foot.
00:43:06.320 Like I could tell he
00:43:06.940 was like this guy
00:43:07.940 is this guy's a
00:43:09.420 hack.
00:43:11.280 He's like oh yeah
00:43:12.120 yeah he was like
00:43:12.900 the flute guy.
00:43:13.920 He was a clarinet.
00:43:14.620 He was like
00:43:14.820 your dad was like
00:43:16.740 this bullshit is I
00:43:18.820 don't like it.
00:43:19.720 There was that guy
00:43:20.740 in the in the
00:43:21.620 dressing room.
00:43:22.800 Before you got
00:43:23.720 there we went to
00:43:24.600 the dressing room
00:43:25.180 and this guy was
00:43:25.720 like Ben you're
00:43:26.300 still doing comedy
00:43:27.060 and you were just
00:43:27.900 like no I quit.
00:43:29.260 And then your dad
00:43:29.860 was like so proud
00:43:30.640 he's like no you
00:43:31.320 have any he sold
00:43:32.060 out Meridian Hall
00:43:32.980 last night through
00:43:33.740 over 3,000 people.
00:43:36.120 Yeah that guy used
00:43:37.580 to try to do
00:43:38.080 yuck yucks with
00:43:38.640 the violin and
00:43:39.520 bombed and
00:43:40.740 President told him
00:43:41.460 to quit so he's
00:43:42.160 sad.
00:43:42.680 Yeah.
00:43:44.020 Great guy.
00:43:45.260 Good guy.
00:43:45.840 Go see him live.
00:43:47.740 Playing for kids.
00:43:49.120 Declaring up.
00:43:51.200 Bring your kids.
00:43:53.080 We're doing
00:43:53.600 Spongebob next week.
00:43:58.020 It's the only
00:43:58.640 stuff that makes
00:44:00.300 money because you
00:44:01.600 know those things
00:44:03.400 make money.
00:44:03.940 Well that is like
00:44:04.840 I mean look if I
00:44:05.660 had a kid I'd
00:44:06.320 rather take my kid
00:44:07.100 did that then you
00:44:08.420 know I'll be like
00:44:08.820 well we're gonna
00:44:09.220 watch Terminator 7
00:44:10.240 this week like.
00:44:13.280 Did we show we
00:44:14.180 didn't show my kids
00:44:14.960 Terminator did we?
00:44:15.940 No we showed her
00:44:16.960 Jurassic Park and
00:44:18.000 she was like you
00:44:18.940 were like you like
00:44:19.520 dinosaurs and
00:44:20.360 honestly since we
00:44:21.240 watched that movie I
00:44:21.960 haven't heard her
00:44:22.760 mention dinosaurs
00:44:23.800 once.
00:44:27.820 You were you were
00:44:28.540 playing cyberpunk and
00:44:29.700 you were like all
00:44:30.320 right here take the
00:44:30.920 controller and then I
00:44:31.680 started killing people
00:44:32.440 like no not in front of
00:44:33.440 the kids.
00:44:34.720 Oh yeah I did that
00:44:35.660 for a bit of your
00:44:36.240 drive around.
00:44:37.160 I did that I was
00:44:37.920 like like I was
00:44:39.000 playing Battlefield
00:44:39.700 and then your
00:44:40.520 daughter came
00:44:41.100 downstairs and I
00:44:41.820 was like
00:44:42.080 back to flights in
00:44:46.200 yeah flights and
00:44:47.160 taking off ATX to
00:44:48.440 Kazakhstan.
00:44:54.220 Yeah Ben's got a
00:44:55.140 tattoo YYZ to ATX
00:44:57.040 which he got when he
00:44:58.360 got his O1 visa and
00:44:59.520 moved to America but
00:45:00.440 he didn't know that
00:45:01.160 the airport code for
00:45:02.120 Austin was a US and
00:45:04.080 ATX is a random city
00:45:05.520 in Kazakhstan so but
00:45:07.120 it is the ATX but it
00:45:08.620 is ATX.
00:45:09.460 It would make more
00:45:09.900 sense if it was like
00:45:10.580 six IX to ATX would
00:45:12.340 be cooler.
00:45:12.960 Six six six on my
00:45:14.180 arm.
00:45:14.660 Oh I'm fucking
00:45:15.400 devil horn who I
00:45:17.060 work at Joe Rogan's
00:45:17.900 club.
00:45:18.160 Hail Satan.
00:45:22.200 Yeah.
00:45:23.160 No that's laser
00:45:24.000 hail.
00:45:25.000 Does he?
00:45:25.880 No.
00:45:26.600 Maybe.
00:45:28.040 Come on brother.
00:45:30.440 I love Satan.
00:45:34.420 I'm cool.
00:45:35.180 Yeah bro I'll fuck
00:45:36.140 single moms and
00:45:37.040 Satan.
00:45:42.420 What's with all these
00:45:43.260 Jews?
00:45:44.620 You got horns
00:45:45.580 Bankus.
00:45:47.760 Ari's here.
00:45:51.180 Some guy commented
00:45:52.640 on the last pod that
00:45:53.700 we all did together
00:45:54.320 and they're like when
00:45:54.800 these three get
00:45:55.400 together you know it's
00:45:56.200 going to be funny.
00:45:57.240 That's funny because we
00:45:58.180 just.
00:45:58.900 Ari dude.
00:46:01.420 When these guys have
00:46:02.380 spent way too much
00:46:03.140 time together in a
00:46:03.980 room.
00:46:05.180 Yeah he wrote that
00:46:06.180 probably right as like
00:46:07.900 he started watching it
00:46:08.880 and then yeah and he
00:46:09.680 got ten minutes and he's
00:46:10.540 like why do I.
00:46:11.780 Why is there a
00:46:12.260 tension?
00:46:14.540 No it is really hard to
00:46:15.880 get people to watch my
00:46:17.620 podcast because.
00:46:19.180 Podcast.
00:46:19.720 They don't know.
00:46:21.460 I think I have a huge
00:46:23.160 opportunity to make my
00:46:24.560 podcast huge because my
00:46:27.080 fans don't watch podcasts
00:46:28.720 in general.
00:46:29.660 So if they do start
00:46:30.880 watching a podcast it's
00:46:32.140 going to be mine.
00:46:33.080 So guys if you're
00:46:34.900 thinking about getting
00:46:35.580 in the podcast anytime
00:46:36.960 soon you like a little
00:46:37.880 podcast on the way it
00:46:38.920 like you like to listen
00:46:39.760 a little you know a
00:46:41.000 little me arguing with
00:46:42.920 my openings and trying
00:46:44.700 to do weird talking
00:46:46.080 about Kamala Harris
00:46:46.760 then give me five
00:46:50.080 bucks a month.
00:46:50.600 Patreon.com.
00:46:51.580 Patreon.com slash
00:46:52.900 Ben Bank.
00:46:53.460 It's all free.
00:46:54.180 It's all free.
00:46:54.600 It's all free.
00:46:54.960 But seriously no but
00:46:56.400 also ten dollars a
00:46:57.500 month.
00:46:58.440 The free podcast is
00:47:00.180 free and then there's a
00:47:01.280 podcast you pay five
00:47:02.240 bucks a month and then
00:47:03.240 it's me yelling at them.
00:47:05.880 It's not bad.
00:47:07.020 Not a bad deal.
00:47:08.400 And you support me and
00:47:09.260 you kind of have to
00:47:09.960 because every other
00:47:11.760 comedian you have to
00:47:13.520 dog it or you don't I
00:47:15.280 just maybe it's almost
00:47:16.760 part of me maybe it's
00:47:17.840 like the lazy way out
00:47:18.880 where it's like just
00:47:19.420 support me on Patreon
00:47:20.340 because if every if
00:47:22.160 half of my fans right
00:47:23.460 now supported me on
00:47:24.300 Patreon I'd be killing
00:47:26.580 it.
00:47:27.120 I mean I'm doing well
00:47:28.500 but that would be like
00:47:29.460 next level or I would
00:47:31.860 have to sell the
00:47:32.500 equivalent amount of
00:47:33.120 tickets which is like
00:47:34.480 okay I'm going to post
00:47:36.040 some fucking clips.
00:47:38.740 Do podcast clips sell
00:47:40.220 tickets though?
00:47:41.260 Yeah.
00:47:41.600 Podcast clip podcast
00:47:42.540 episodes sell tickets.
00:47:44.400 If you're watching a
00:47:45.440 full episode you're
00:47:46.280 going to buy tickets but
00:47:47.140 if you're watching just
00:47:47.820 a podcast clip are you
00:47:48.780 like oh my god I saw
00:47:49.640 a podcast clip of a guy
00:47:50.680 he's a comedian
00:47:51.660 apparently.
00:47:52.080 No.
00:47:52.460 You see somebody doing
00:47:54.060 stand-up and then you
00:47:56.160 go that's funny and then
00:47:57.280 you buy.
00:47:57.940 That's what sold me on
00:47:58.780 Kamala Harris.
00:48:00.620 Clips.
00:48:01.500 It's all the clips.
00:48:02.700 She's got great clips.
00:48:04.620 Pull up her and let's
00:48:05.920 watch a couple clips.
00:48:13.440 The show was incredible
00:48:14.560 though and the night
00:48:15.160 before that we were in
00:48:15.900 New York City New York
00:48:17.860 Comedy Festival.
00:48:18.640 They were also a lot of
00:48:19.900 fun.
00:48:20.280 They were also ashamed
00:48:21.120 that I was.
00:48:22.340 Oh they were even more
00:48:23.540 rattled because everyone
00:48:24.440 working there was.
00:48:28.520 Put it up to the.
00:48:29.980 Put it up.
00:48:31.680 One of the most enduring
00:48:33.200 aspects of our legacy is
00:48:35.180 that we both wake up
00:48:37.700 every morning with our
00:48:39.660 first and highest priority
00:48:41.000 being the safety the
00:48:42.620 security and the
00:48:43.360 prosperity of the
00:48:44.300 American people.
00:48:44.960 Who's talking about
00:48:50.640 Trump?
00:48:51.520 Her and Biden.
00:48:52.400 Biden probably.
00:48:53.660 Dear Vice President
00:48:55.000 Harris.
00:48:56.080 I am writing to express
00:48:57.560 my deepest admiration
00:48:58.900 and gratitude for your
00:49:00.880 impact on my life and
00:49:02.720 the lives of so many
00:49:03.700 others.
00:49:04.560 As a young person I
00:49:05.740 often felt disconnected
00:49:07.000 from the political world.
00:49:09.080 Unsure of how I can make
00:49:10.320 a difference in the
00:49:11.500 issues that matter most
00:49:12.540 to me.
00:49:13.120 But your journey has
00:49:14.520 shown me that it is not
00:49:15.500 only possible but
00:49:16.520 essential for people
00:49:18.240 like me to step up and
00:49:19.900 lead.
00:49:20.780 What does that mean?
00:49:21.460 What does people like me
00:49:22.640 mean?
00:49:22.920 Is that a racial thing?
00:49:25.500 Or is that like a like
00:49:26.480 for like me like people
00:49:27.920 with long head like a
00:49:29.360 dumb like another dumb
00:49:30.680 bitch.
00:49:35.020 Visa revoked.
00:49:36.160 You called a politician
00:49:44.040 a dumb bitch on an
00:49:45.000 obscure podcast.
00:49:46.380 We had to really search
00:49:47.320 for this.
00:49:47.660 We really didn't want
00:49:49.060 you to come in.
00:49:49.360 There's only about
00:49:49.560 1,200 views on it.
00:49:50.760 Ladies and gentlemen,
00:49:53.120 make us pod or show
00:49:54.460 or the experience.
00:49:55.900 Oh, the funniest is the
00:49:56.800 meet and greets and
00:49:57.480 people go, you got a
00:49:58.480 podcast?
00:49:59.440 How do I watch your
00:50:00.260 podcast?
00:50:00.520 How do that is the
00:50:01.580 craziest question?
00:50:02.400 People will ask me,
00:50:03.100 how do you how do I
00:50:04.960 watch your podcast?
00:50:06.900 If you can't figure it
00:50:08.040 out, I don't like you
00:50:09.760 don't watch.
00:50:10.300 You're never going to
00:50:10.760 watch it.
00:50:11.620 Like if you're asking
00:50:12.440 me how I like the
00:50:13.980 idea of the podcast,
00:50:15.100 just it being us being
00:50:16.400 like, why isn't anyone
00:50:17.640 watching this?
00:50:19.780 Why aren't you what?
00:50:21.120 I'm giving you
00:50:21.980 everything.
00:50:22.500 We got a book.
00:50:23.700 Look, we got a Jew.
00:50:25.020 We got a room.
00:50:25.860 We got a room.
00:50:26.460 If you look at we gave
00:50:27.420 an Italian guy like
00:50:28.700 $500.
00:50:29.640 When you look at each
00:50:31.940 other, I just have
00:50:32.840 optical illusions in
00:50:33.940 the background.
00:50:34.980 I just make eye
00:50:36.360 contact like the whole
00:50:37.240 wall starts shifting
00:50:38.400 like that.
00:50:39.160 Like that's not.
00:50:41.220 That ain't right.
00:50:43.040 That ain't right, kid.
00:50:45.220 A boy.
00:50:45.820 I'm right.
00:50:47.920 But it was an
00:50:48.600 incredible time.
00:50:49.300 Went to Monkey Bar.
00:50:51.540 Monkey Bar is a great
00:50:52.560 restaurant.
00:50:53.140 It's a good restaurant
00:50:53.840 in Manhattan.
00:50:55.240 Ari's never gone.
00:50:56.060 He's only ever gone to
00:50:56.960 a weird Jew deli.
00:50:58.480 He's like, I know you
00:50:59.760 want to go to Sweet
00:51:00.300 Green?
00:51:01.800 He's like, you want to
00:51:02.320 go to Black?
00:51:05.100 No, he only knows
00:51:06.080 like ramen spots like
00:51:07.160 two blocks from his
00:51:07.880 house.
00:51:10.180 He hates us right
00:51:11.080 now.
00:51:12.060 I know he hates us.
00:51:13.060 I don't hate you
00:51:13.820 guys.
00:51:14.940 I want to be one of
00:51:15.660 these houseplants.
00:51:16.380 What do you eat in
00:51:16.960 Rhode Island?
00:51:19.380 I like, I don't
00:51:20.020 know, cook home or
00:51:21.540 like just go there's a
00:51:23.680 wiener place.
00:51:24.420 I like how you're just
00:51:24.940 like, yeah, I'm just
00:51:25.460 a normal guy, you
00:51:26.500 know, I just cook at
00:51:28.420 home with my parents.
00:51:29.780 Rhode Island is a
00:51:31.020 wiener place.
00:51:31.780 This is crazy.
00:51:32.600 It's Onlyville system
00:51:34.120 wieners.
00:51:34.680 Apparently, Rhode
00:51:35.460 Island's like one of
00:51:36.060 the only states where
00:51:36.680 you can like mix
00:51:37.400 certain meats
00:51:38.060 together.
00:51:39.400 And so you can only
00:51:40.000 get these like hot
00:51:41.300 wieners in Rhode
00:51:44.400 Island.
00:51:45.240 Such a hot guys.
00:51:46.980 Hot wieners.
00:51:48.560 Hot cock.
00:51:49.480 What do you like to
00:51:49.800 eat?
00:51:50.620 Dick.
00:51:53.560 Uncircumcised cock.
00:51:54.700 Go back to Rhode
00:51:56.140 Island.
00:51:56.640 It's the only state
00:51:59.400 where it's legal.
00:52:00.140 Does your dad like
00:52:00.760 them?
00:52:01.540 Not kosher.
00:52:02.880 So he doesn't know
00:52:03.540 that you're eating it.
00:52:04.180 He doesn't even know
00:52:04.640 they exist.
00:52:05.180 Oh yeah, we gave him
00:52:05.720 shellfish.
00:52:06.120 So you eat food outside
00:52:07.560 of the home and then
00:52:08.740 come home and pretend
00:52:10.060 like you're kosher?
00:52:11.520 I don't pretend, we
00:52:12.380 just don't talk about
00:52:13.140 it.
00:52:13.580 Doesn't that technically
00:52:14.420 make them not kosher
00:52:15.400 by you not being
00:52:16.100 kosher?
00:52:16.620 Wasn't your mom like
00:52:17.660 upset at your comedy
00:52:18.760 that you were telling
00:52:19.420 me the other night?
00:52:20.140 Like she heard one of
00:52:20.780 your jokes and she
00:52:21.380 was like, you just
00:52:22.000 get it's not right.
00:52:22.960 Well she like, I
00:52:24.040 don't know, she
00:52:24.400 kind of, she had like
00:52:26.560 a heart attack and
00:52:27.340 then was like lost
00:52:29.280 her mind kind of for
00:52:30.080 a few months and then
00:52:30.960 like wouldn't talk to
00:52:31.860 me unless the rabbi
00:52:32.660 was present.
00:52:33.200 It was, I thought I
00:52:35.520 shouldn't be talking
00:52:35.980 about this on the
00:52:36.540 internet.
00:52:38.820 Patreon.com if you
00:52:40.220 want to find out.
00:52:41.100 I'm afraid to reveal
00:52:41.980 private information to
00:52:43.060 either of you.
00:52:43.640 It's going to come
00:52:44.040 back to bite me in
00:52:44.820 the ass.
00:52:46.280 Whatever you already
00:52:47.920 told us in that
00:52:48.780 millisecond was, yeah,
00:52:51.060 we're going to be
00:52:52.540 using that.
00:52:55.380 Ari, get Ari in
00:52:56.480 here, get a rabbi
00:52:57.280 so I can have a
00:52:57.780 conversation.
00:52:58.840 He talked to my
00:52:59.700 son, not, not to
00:53:00.740 you, with the rabbi
00:53:01.680 through you.
00:53:02.480 Come on.
00:53:04.340 Why?
00:53:05.140 What's the rabbi
00:53:06.000 thing mean?
00:53:07.460 Oh, it was just
00:53:08.180 like.
00:53:08.840 Because she's
00:53:09.320 disappointed in you?
00:53:11.540 That's like not even,
00:53:12.960 it was just like the,
00:53:13.940 it was like the
00:53:14.500 burning J's joke.
00:53:15.940 She got really mad
00:53:16.780 about that joke.
00:53:17.860 She said that.
00:53:18.660 She told me every
00:53:19.900 time she said to him
00:53:21.740 every time you tell
00:53:23.360 that joke, it
00:53:24.500 breaks my heart.
00:53:26.400 Every time you tell
00:53:27.340 that joke, murder
00:53:28.560 you.
00:53:29.620 It's burning
00:53:30.120 the whole.
00:53:31.680 I don't know.
00:53:32.140 It's, I think it's
00:53:32.860 just because I'm
00:53:33.180 talking about smoking
00:53:33.760 weed.
00:53:36.700 That's why she's
00:53:37.600 like, you're talking
00:53:37.900 about doing drugs.
00:53:38.900 It's like.
00:53:39.400 Yeah, Bob, I'm
00:53:41.880 literally barely above
00:53:43.960 a street person
00:53:44.620 living in your
00:53:45.160 apartment.
00:53:47.260 Sorry.
00:53:51.660 Wasn't anyone like
00:53:52.560 the bookies?
00:53:54.080 You don't like a
00:53:54.600 bookies?
00:53:55.380 Insult my friend
00:53:56.240 and go, oh, my
00:53:56.800 bad.
00:53:59.600 No, you're just a
00:54:00.320 worthless.
00:54:00.720 I'm not told me not
00:54:01.460 to apologize anymore.
00:54:02.620 Listen, you live like
00:54:03.380 shit.
00:54:04.700 No, the bathroom
00:54:05.840 door is fixed in his
00:54:07.240 apartment.
00:54:07.580 It closes now.
00:54:08.420 You just need all
00:54:08.920 new furniture.
00:54:10.680 No, the furniture is
00:54:11.560 fine.
00:54:12.520 I didn't mean that
00:54:13.600 like you were
00:54:14.100 homeless.
00:54:14.880 I just mean that,
00:54:15.840 you know, you're a
00:54:17.620 stand-up comedian in
00:54:18.880 Manhattan living in
00:54:21.380 a place that's not
00:54:23.080 new.
00:54:24.980 What's below that?
00:54:26.620 How dare you not
00:54:27.260 live in the
00:54:27.900 billionaire's row as
00:54:29.460 a comedian in
00:54:30.080 Manhattan.
00:54:31.540 If you're doing
00:54:31.860 stand-up in New
00:54:32.660 York.
00:54:32.760 Why didn't you just
00:54:33.360 vote, man?
00:54:34.220 Why didn't you vote
00:54:34.860 for Cuomo, bro?
00:54:36.700 Where's Cuomo?
00:54:38.000 I should have.
00:54:39.440 All the Jewish
00:54:40.080 girls are out there
00:54:41.200 protesting for Cuomo.
00:54:42.840 Really?
00:54:43.340 Yeah, I'm in all
00:54:44.420 these Jewish group
00:54:45.260 chats where they're
00:54:45.700 like, hey, we're
00:54:46.120 going to go out to
00:54:46.860 tell people to vote
00:54:47.980 for Cuomo.
00:54:49.400 It's like the only
00:54:50.180 group of young
00:54:50.800 people that were not
00:54:52.300 Mamdani.
00:54:52.580 When we got to the
00:54:54.100 venue in New York,
00:54:54.860 they spelled my name
00:54:56.160 wrong.
00:54:56.560 The production manager
00:54:57.460 was like, he was
00:54:58.280 sorry.
00:54:58.640 He's like, oh, my
00:54:59.020 bad, bro.
00:54:59.460 And I was like, it's
00:54:59.960 okay, Mamdani.
00:55:01.780 We already won.
00:55:02.920 He just smiled.
00:55:03.900 Just puts Armand
00:55:04.440 Mamdani.
00:55:04.960 Yeah, no, the
00:55:09.840 Mamdani thing is
00:55:10.980 the interesting thing
00:55:12.680 about the Jews not
00:55:14.180 worried about Mamdani
00:55:15.360 like have like genuine
00:55:16.340 concern, whereas I
00:55:18.160 feel like Muslims are
00:55:19.420 voting for Mamdani
00:55:20.240 just for fun.
00:55:20.980 They're like, we'll be
00:55:22.020 fine either way, but
00:55:22.700 this will be fucking
00:55:23.300 hilarious.
00:55:24.140 Yeah, well, it's your
00:55:24.800 homer.
00:55:26.160 Support your home team.
00:55:27.820 Yeah.
00:55:28.940 That's where the, oh,
00:55:30.800 we need to get rid of
00:55:31.580 all the divisions.
00:55:32.220 And it's like, well,
00:55:32.640 but the division exists
00:55:33.740 because people are in
00:55:36.240 their own communities
00:55:37.200 within countries and
00:55:39.720 then just vote for
00:55:41.280 people in those
00:55:42.320 communities.
00:55:43.240 So what you're saying
00:55:44.240 is the solution is to
00:55:46.880 run for office.
00:55:47.720 You have to be white.
00:55:49.980 Keep the politicians
00:55:51.600 white.
00:55:53.160 Right.
00:55:53.800 Keep the politicians
00:55:54.540 white men.
00:55:55.700 Ben Bank is
00:55:56.280 segregationist.
00:55:58.200 Everybody else can
00:55:59.060 have fun, but just
00:55:59.880 let the, you know, let
00:56:01.000 us figure this out
00:56:01.940 because otherwise you
00:56:02.640 guys, there's a
00:56:04.260 reason you're here
00:56:04.920 because you might have
00:56:07.360 did a bad job over
00:56:08.360 there.
00:56:08.780 It's because Israel.
00:56:10.060 Oh yeah.
00:56:10.740 It's because Israel,
00:56:11.480 not because yeah,
00:56:12.120 Pakistan.
00:56:13.460 People want to leave
00:56:14.340 Pakistan because of
00:56:15.360 Israel.
00:56:16.420 No, because there's
00:56:17.520 not proper sewage
00:56:19.760 systems and the
00:56:21.420 streets are filled
00:56:22.760 with garbage.
00:56:23.920 That's dangerous.
00:56:24.980 And you can be
00:56:25.260 shot, raped, killed
00:56:27.300 any fucking moment.
00:56:28.980 That's just New
00:56:29.480 York.
00:56:31.000 It's just this guy's
00:56:32.420 area.
00:56:33.400 The Upper East
00:56:33.900 Side.
00:56:34.540 It's falling apart
00:56:35.280 since Mom Donnie's
00:56:36.020 got there.
00:56:36.680 Give out his
00:56:37.100 address.
00:56:37.860 Ari lives.
00:56:41.000 No, no, he lives
00:56:42.280 in Brooklyn.
00:56:44.680 Thank you for tuning
00:56:45.680 in to this week's
00:56:46.880 Bankist podcast.
00:56:48.960 The rest of this
00:56:49.900 episode, 15 more
00:56:52.360 minutes plus another
00:56:54.300 10 minutes of me
00:56:55.500 talking like this
00:56:56.680 are on Patreon.
00:56:58.580 Need you guys to
00:56:59.440 support me over on
00:57:00.400 Patreon, patreon.com
00:57:01.940 slash Ben Bankist.
00:57:03.600 That's where you get
00:57:04.480 all of the bonus
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00:57:07.200 stand up podcasts
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00:57:10.720 Please support me.
00:57:11.940 Check it out.
00:57:13.420 At the very least,
00:57:14.640 join as a free
00:57:15.500 member and see how
00:57:16.580 much we're posting
00:57:17.360 and if that's the
00:57:18.620 type of thing you
00:57:19.280 want to be paying
00:57:21.080 for, which I think
00:57:22.620 you should because
00:57:23.800 there's a lot of
00:57:24.280 people paying for
00:57:25.060 it's a lot
00:57:25.840 dumb as shit.
00:57:27.780 So patreon.com
00:57:28.740 slash Ben Bankist.
00:57:29.540 Thank you for
00:57:29.860 listening to this
00:57:30.300 episode and we'll
00:57:31.320 see you next week.