Hanging out in Collingwood with Armin Arbabi ｜ The Bankas Show on Patreon - #048
Episode Stats
Words per minute
171.15396
Harmful content
Misogyny
7
sentences flagged
Toxicity
98
sentences flagged
Hate speech
47
sentences flagged
Summary
In this bonus episode of the podcast, we talk about the Gaza street, the Israels, and the liquor stores in Canada. We also talk about a lot of other things, but this is a bonus episode.
Transcript
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patreon patreon bonus episode welcome everybody listening for free what uh pieces of shit
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shit shit you just doing you just yo you wanna check this shit out man you got five dollars
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if you pay more money i do the whole podcast like this
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you should just do it i think that's the secret i think if you just did the podcast but like
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serious though but just in that accent i don't think the israel powers that don't think
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they should maybe attack maybe they should defend or no attack
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yeah dude i think that's i think you should do rogan like that and not acknowledge
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now this is actually i have to talk like this i am a tiny person um today we are going to
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i know i wrote a statistic about the gaza street
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that's about enough i think i would start actually i think i would go insane if i did
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that for an hour and a half i think like when you become senile that's the voice you're gonna
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get locked in is you're gonna like be doing it one day and then the dementia hits and then
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it's like you forgot who you are you just are chinese
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i don't like when you say a thing right down to me
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let's go to a mandarin do they have a mandarin here if you're not if you're american listening
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to this you go to canada you want to have the fattest possible canadian experience you go to a
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mandarin it's like a chinese buffet it's kind of like uh america doesn't they don't have chains
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of buffets really for like they have panda express and shit like like that kind of buffet but like
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they don't have chinese buffets like mandarin is a special motherfucking place dude yeah if you're
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from ontario mandarin is like the fucking best place maybe it's is it only ontario i think so i
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they're finally raising the speed limits which i like in ontario
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doug ford everybody shits on doug ford i kind of i mean
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look i don't like when they when they do the politicians do something you like you you like it
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okay i mean they can get away with a lot of shit they can get away with a lot of shit
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but if they're doing shit like we're raising the speed limits and you can smoke weed everywhere
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anywhere and you can take shits on people oh well that's why the indians are here because
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you can take a shit wherever you want that's but
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um i don't know he like the beer store or the the beer and oh shit in in convenience stores like
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americans don't realize that most of canada doesn't even have that they don't even have
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you can't buy liquor in a convenience store you can buy like in in england you can buy
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full bottles of vodka in convenience stores yeah like it's nuts so
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pretty nuts that that we're just getting that and now like the liberals are pushing back against
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it they're like this is bad this is bad for society blah blah blah it's like look if you're gonna if
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you're that much of an alcoholic you're just gonna go to the the place you can buy booze and buy as much
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booze as you can't yeah it's like you're not stopping anybody by taking away the convenience
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of like regular people this it's it's this whole assumption that like everyone's a crackhead because
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and then the liberals are like they're in favor of that that's what you can't have liquor stores and
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beer stores open all the time because everybody's out of their minds like that's your fault though
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what the other half's like what about regular people are like i want to fucking get a six-pack
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right now and i can't because i have to wait till tomorrow and that just takes away like a certain
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like level of freedom well they stopped the sale at 11 though still really yeah no yeah in the
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fucking convenience store yep no it's yeah yeah it's like a certain hour to a certain hour oh it's not
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even worth it i know that was my exact thought too when i first when we first came back i was like
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oh i was kind of excited like circle k i went by and it's like no it stops at 11 and they're like
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strict so canadian to just be like oh we were fighting for our right if we have a little
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fucking beer it's odd well other provinces have it quebec you can do it i think and alberta and
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shit yeah alberta yeah alberta has liquor stores open till two i don't know guys it's fucking weird
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being in the states for as long as i was and then like not that long but like
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you know for most of the time and touring there and then coming back to canada's
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was more of a culture shock than i thought it would be i thought it would
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i thought i'd feel more like comfortable back back here but now i feel like in a way less comfortable but
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now because i've been here so long like all of a sudden i'm feeling more comfortable but i don't like
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it i'm like oh no yeah i'm starting oh the indian guy did a good job oh starting to like it he put me
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in the right room oh yeah he was pretty good talk about that the awful well yeah i don't know
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like fucking no it's not it's my fault i booked a hotel the wrong day and i had to somehow get them
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to put the money towards today's hotel and i had to call like stupid amount of people booking.com
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this that it's just you know it's just not it's not that easy kid you know you make it look pretty
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easy you gotta call a lot of people you gotta make you gotta push a lot of buttons it's crazy how much
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kids little kids love pushing buttons and then when i like when i was a kid like my parents made it me
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feel like wow it's not pushing so many fucking like i don't know like you i would go to
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the science center and i swear my dad would be like stop pushing the button
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that's the whole fucking point of going to the science center is to push buttons and my dad's like
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can you not be pushing so many buttons what did your dad think it was gonna be just a lecture
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just sit down and teach you about astronomy and fucking physics that's so fucked up yeah the more
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you tell me about your childhood the more it makes sense that's horrible pushing these buttons
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i don't even know if he really said that but like i do remember he had that vibe like vibe of like
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the like like he looked disgusting because there'd be like a bunch of kids pushing the button and then
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i'd push it and he'd be like oh you're still in the gym what did you think he was you were gonna be
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like every kid's so filthy you're gonna get sick oh god just takes you to canada's wonderland he's
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like why are you going on the rides yeah that's terrible no oh no he took me when i was like eight
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two or i was seven or something i think i was seven and he took me to one of those screamers like
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yeah and i got there and it literally said like must be nine or something to get in
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and i was like dad like i'm not old enough and he's like see you nine tonight
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like i'm seven like i literally told them i was like i don't want to go in and then they're like
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my dad's like yeah he's fine and then they just like let me in collectively let you get
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all i could hear was chainsaws and i was like crying freaking out just seven just like and but
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but the reason we had to go is because my parents had an argument that day oh because they my my dad
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was already sleeping like in the fucking living room and like my mom just went nuts and was like
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do something with him take him somewhere do something with god's sake took you to the scary
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yeah he took me to the scare world with like he never had weird like fuck like cool friend with
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like a weird hat and then i lost his hat so he was mad so like we went through one
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of the haunted houses when we were in there and i was just like terrified and like they
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and i was like wow i was so scared like it's too young to be in there yeah terrified right
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and i dropped the hat that was like some beret that he had me fucking wearing like a little
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fag and then the hat fell off and i came we came out and then like it's dark in there so then it was
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light and then he's like where's the hat where the hell's the goddamn hat and he's like what no
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my dad oh your dad he's like we're going back he like takes me back into the like and then he's
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like it was kind of cool though it made me less scared because he was like to like some guy with
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like a fucking scare mask on he's like we lost a hat you gotta lost that man and the guys like the
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guy is like a wolf yeah yeah yeah yeah and he's just like well we'll check and see if we can bring
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it back to the front and like i don't know it kind of made me less scared which is kind of cool
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but yeah i was fucking terrified and then i think we ended up doing the chainsaw thing but by that
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point i kind of was like oh it's fake i get it it's fake it's fake but i'm seven so i'm like it's
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pretty scary i just i don't even like there was some like then i think those were way scarier than
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now maybe i'm wrong yeah i think so too but they got away with crazy shit like and they had like the
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like all the kids working for those scare companies are like 17 18 year old kids who are
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like yo i'm gonna scare yeah yeah yeah fuck down for it it's terrifying that's actually a pretty sick
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job i kind of want you should apply for that for uh for right now probably or you could probably be a
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zombie at wonderland oh yeah well sorry ben i can't come to hollywood i'm a zombie i gotta go
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scared well i was like i got paid more for this
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i don't know halloween shit but yeah i don't know it's
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oh there's a can part delivery yeah we're in collingwood right now
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this is let's go eat yeah let's continue this later we want to just eat and then do this while
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let's do it after the show we got too high for this i told you we should have had a dart
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i'm definitely not too high for this i just
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a little bit i was thinking about like when my dad took me to the cne when i was like a kid
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so there was like you know the like the maze where it's like see-through like mirrors and shit like
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that get lost i remember like so the whole line of people can like see into it right right and i was
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like i think i was like eight and i started running and i just ran face first into like a mirror
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and i just saw like probably the like 20 year old or whatever that worked there like
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saw me do that and just he just started dying laughing
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just saw like an eight-year-old run face first into a fucking two-way mirror and i just like ate shit
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it it's pretty yeah i worked at ontario place as a ride operator and they would definitely
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that sounds dangerous man like how like they just was they just let a kid just like
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they had all these like the union guys they call them the union guys like it was a bunch of italians
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in like you know utility vehicles that look like golf carts with a bunch of like just random tools
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and like right like the rides down we gotta call the union guys and they just like drive down they
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like were in the same building but they're literally like in a union like they like that their whole life
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they just work at ontario place like fixing rides or whatever the fuck and yeah they would just like
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drive down and like fix it there'd be like an oil spill like all like like oil would be leaking out
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of the yeah tilt a whirl and shit like that and we'd have to shut it down and they'd be like oh we're
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gonna be down for a couple days you know like it was so bad but it was pretty fun it was actually
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really fun working there i remember being like i want to work here next year and then they shut it down
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like i would have worked there the second summer damn yeah i was gonna like and yeah i was gonna
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get like a raise and shit wow and then they were just like casually like no we're just shutting the
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entire park but it was fun like you'd just be on a rotation of shit and then like you know you'd be
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at one point you'd be at mini putt right so for sick you just stand there and like rent out clubs and
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like help little kids like fucking get like holes in one and shit like stupid like because like i'm
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not actually but like their parent like you know the parents would be like we lost a ball i don't
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like stupid shit and then you go over and be like check this out and you just like and they'd be like
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oh like i don't know it's just trying to get pussy playing mini putt it's just crazy
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yeah and there was i don't know it was just it was such a good vibe i mean pre-covid era
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no like it was super diverse and nobody was racist at all yeah like i wasn't even racist
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because it wasn't because like i know i'm not racist i'm just anti like
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bullshit yeah woke stuff like we obviously made racist jokes to each other and shit like that
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but it wasn't like but it was kind of like out in the open like you'd openly do it and people just
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thought it was funny right i don't know it wasn't like now where everybody's like so like this guy's
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white this guy's black yeah yeah yeah like then it was just like yo this guy's a guy
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that's a guy like our boss was gay and it was just like kind of like nobody gave a
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fuck like he was chill like he would just be like yeah you want to do this do that like you know
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and like all the chicks were just like hot and like yeah he pretty much would just he kind of
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would just like tell which you just tell chicks be like go fuck that guy really kind of a little bit
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oh i didn't know that was going on at ontario place
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that was the place and there was this guy there's like redheaded
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uh guy who also went to queens yeah that worked there his name was dash
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he's like this redheaded guy and he was like fell in love with this like filipino chick and
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then like i ended up like hooking up with her or something oh no and he was like so
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just like heartbroken yeah he was just like so sad about it like i think like he i did it like
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right in front of him too like you fucked her right i was like hey come to my house to him and
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her and then like ended up just hooking up with her oh no he was just like
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like nerdy redheaded guy and then he went ended up doing out way too much acid and then like got
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schizophrenia really yeah you ruined his life yeah
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i mean that is kind of funny though thinking about a dude being sad like working at ontario place
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it's not like it was his girlfriend or something it's like it was just never even touched her oh
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he just was like had a crush on her oh yeah it was just a fucking pussy it was just a pussy yeah
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it's not like he was like dating her or something damn yeah yeah it was fucked up but then he and
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then he just was like i'm seeing ufos every night and just was like oh my god well that's that's not
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good no that's kind of like yeah me yeah yeah yeah you're like dude i did i mean it's oh yeah
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video evidence guys like dude i've seen i mean if that guy showed me a video of like whatever he
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described but i remember just being like really high with him one day and he was just like
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it was a it was an airplane that it turned into a thing and the thing i mean yeah that's like
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schizophrenic yeah hopefully he bounced back from that maybe probably not man
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he bounced back i just got schizophrenia you know lost a step
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sometimes in life you go sideways hey i'll be back in a couple years
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let's go hey come on oh he comes back i mean you can pretty sure you can't he's just trying
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to work there he's like 38 he's like yeah i work terribly fuck i think casinos casinos are a
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good place to work if like you're you fucked a loser but you're not like
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cracked out or whatever right yeah like if you didn't like you could just be like a blackjack
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dealer or something yeah i don't even know i don't even know how that that that job seems really
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fucked up and hard it seems that job sounds awful it's kind of it's really fun if you love cards in
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a way like you grew up playing cards and like there was always cards cards cards but wouldn't you just
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be like a gambler at that point though no because you play like euchre with your family oh okay cards
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like that like they're just really good at car like counting and numbers and all that kind of
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shit but it's all automated now though it's it's you don't even shuffle the deck like themselves
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at least the blackjack tables that i've seen so they don't cheat yeah so it really is just so you
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sit there and hand a card and then some guy loses money and calls you a slur
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yeah i hate when i'm doing we're doing comedy there's no casino because it's like
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it's worth going and spending like you spent you lose 200 bucks and then you or you win like
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a thousand bucks and then you yeah do like food you know and then you come home you go to bed
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eat and sleep meet and greet yeah did you say that in the pod no that was before when we were
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talking about because no the meet and greets after the shows are awesome we even had it was pretty cool
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in owen town like we you know we meet and greet um we tried to have a cigarette the
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american lesbian who ran the place was nice to me but then she was like you can't smoke here and it
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was like private area on their roof it's like i don't know that's the canadian thing where it's
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like americans really take pride in their like this is my business you can smoke wherever the hell you
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want yeah i know it's like what bylaw officer is going to come by to this exact bar right now in
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owen sound like what like we're gonna get fined if you if you lose the license they're just waiting for
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the ben bankers show to end just to catch like the bar letting two people have a cigarette i mean
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yeah seriously whatever um you know they uh at least we like we got to smoke there the whole night
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before they found out they didn't know we were out there
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yeah that was kind of an interest like people from america are watching that going what the
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fuck where is this but for ontario it's like yeah it's kind of a small town but it's also known
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people are like oh yeah owen sound because it's near toronto yeah it's a cottage town kind of it's
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near cottages it's like a shitty cottage town and then callingwood's like the nice cottage town this
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is like that like legit legit bougie like people have modern mansions here like everyone driving over
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here was crazy there's a lot of fucking nice properties thank you for listening to the podcast the
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rest of this podcast is available on my patreon patreon.com slash ben bank is b-e-n-b-a-n-k-a-s
00:21:49.520
join today it's only like four bucks a month it helps out a lot and you get a full bonus podcast every
00:21:57.360
week appreciate you guys and we'll see you over on patreon