Bankas Podcast - September 04, 2024


Kamala Says the N-Word | The Bankas Show - #062


Episode Stats


Length

58 minutes

Words per minute

181.20886

Word count

10,553

Sentence count

804

Harmful content

Misogyny

105

sentences flagged

Toxicity

414

sentences flagged

Hate speech

104

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Kamala Harris is half black, half white, half Indian/Jamaican/Jussie Smolletta, half Chinese/Irish, half Pakistani/Irish/Irish. She likes to say the N-word, boom boom, boom, our ass clout.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.320 Well, I hope the algorithm picks this guy up.
00:00:03.240 The algorithm's gonna see this and go,
00:00:05.460 we're running with this.
00:00:07.060 Dude, this is what the algorithm wants,
00:00:08.660 is towels in the background in a pre-furnished living room. 1.00
00:00:12.840 My kid's fucking towel. 0.99
00:00:14.260 Kid's towels, kid's toys. 1.00
00:00:16.540 That's all I'm looking at right now is just kid's stuff.
00:00:19.260 It's nice.
00:00:20.960 I like it.
00:00:22.920 For who?
00:00:25.600 Not for anyone in this house,
00:00:27.260 but there's somebody in the world that would see this
00:00:30.900 and think that this is quite pleasant.
00:00:34.760 I feel like I'm in a poorly run daycare by migrants. 1.00
00:00:40.060 Welcome to the Bankist Show, everybody.
00:00:42.200 This week we will be talking about Kamala Harris's black voice
00:00:45.700 and how she likes to go, 0.99
00:00:47.220 boom, our ass clout. 1.00
00:00:50.420 Kamala, like, 0.99
00:00:52.560 Drake does the same thing.
00:00:54.920 Like, all half black people do it. 1.00
00:00:58.160 Let's not kid around. 0.99
00:00:59.240 Everybody's acting like it's like,
00:01:00.520 oh, Kamala Harris,
00:01:01.780 how could she do a black voice? 0.92
00:01:03.420 I mean, she's part black 0.90
00:01:04.780 and she's part white.
00:01:07.740 So, like, I do a black voice
00:01:10.280 and I'm not black at all.
00:01:11.840 I'll do it right now. 1.00
00:01:12.880 She, motherfucker, 1.00
00:01:13.760 I do that motherfucking voice 1.00
00:01:14.940 whenever the fuck I want. 1.00
00:01:16.080 You know what I mean? 1.00
00:01:17.680 But she is half black 0.99
00:01:20.100 and just like Drake,
00:01:21.000 I mean, Drake does that thing
00:01:22.180 where he's having a conversation.
00:01:23.480 He's like, yes, we're going to do the deal.
00:01:25.500 We're going to get the album out.
00:01:26.800 And then, like, his fans walk in.
00:01:28.360 He's like,
00:01:28.600 wagwan, wagwan,
00:01:29.780 you boomba raskrat. 0.99
00:01:31.540 I mean, this is just what half black people do. 0.99
00:01:34.020 Sometimes they got to talk black 0.98
00:01:35.440 just to get it out of the system, kids.
00:01:38.140 Can we leave this woman alone? 1.00
00:01:39.780 This woman?
00:01:41.040 This woman?
00:01:42.160 She is a woman.
00:01:43.100 She's a black, Indian, white, 1.00
00:01:45.180 Jamaican, Chinese, African-American woman.
00:01:48.040 Can she not go, 1.00
00:01:50.980 she, motherfucker, 1.00
00:01:52.280 once in a while? 1.00
00:01:54.660 I want to see her say the N-word.
00:01:56.320 I want to see Kamala Harris
00:01:58.020 say the N-word on live TV,
00:02:01.900 hard R,
00:02:03.160 and I want her to,
00:02:04.540 and I want,
00:02:05.140 Is it going to be hard R?
00:02:06.380 I want a hard R from Kamala Harris,
00:02:08.840 and I want to see her sell it.
00:02:12.380 I want to see the,
00:02:13.220 you know,
00:02:13.500 the other black lady that they have 1.00
00:02:15.420 who's like the secretary of,
00:02:18.040 the press secretary
00:02:19.000 who has to talk to everybody. 0.88
00:02:20.360 She looks like a Muppet 0.95
00:02:21.300 with the bad blonde hair, 0.99
00:02:23.460 and she's black, 1.00
00:02:24.680 and she's wearing fucking, 1.00
00:02:26.120 she's got makeup on, 1.00
00:02:27.660 looks like she's a backup dancer 1.00
00:02:29.140 for fucking Megan Thee Stallion. 0.99
00:02:31.260 I want her to explain 1.00
00:02:33.620 to the American people,
00:02:36.580 Kamala had to say the hard R
00:02:38.760 because,
00:02:40.680 listen,
00:02:41.880 people don't care about the hard R.
00:02:43.300 They care about the economy.
00:02:45.040 They care about education.
00:02:48.600 They care about healthcare.
00:02:49.820 They don't care.
00:02:51.080 Kamala Harris could drop a hard R 1.00
00:02:52.740 every day of the week,
00:02:53.640 and that doesn't even matter
00:02:54.900 to the average American.
00:02:58.540 Let me axe you a question, Kamala.
00:03:02.260 Yo, yo, yo, Kamala,
00:03:03.460 let me ask you something.
00:03:04.420 When you get pulled over,
00:03:05.540 do you use the black voice?
00:03:07.040 My mom used to always say 0.79
00:03:08.200 that she used to complain 0.95
00:03:09.100 about the black kids at her school. 0.97
00:03:10.220 She literally taught 0.95
00:03:11.240 at a predominantly black school.
00:03:12.760 Oh, so that's where
00:03:13.520 this comes from.
00:03:14.180 But it wasn't predominantly black
00:03:15.940 for like the first 10 years.
00:03:17.460 Right.
00:03:17.760 It was like all white kids, 1.00
00:03:18.860 and then all of a sudden,
00:03:19.880 and she'd always say that,
00:03:20.740 and then all of a sudden,
00:03:21.760 the Jamaicans showed up.
00:03:23.680 Next thing you know,
00:03:24.740 they're asking,
00:03:25.280 can I axe you a question, miss? 0.88
00:03:27.900 Can I axe you a question? 0.99
00:03:30.480 My mom would just get hammered 1.00
00:03:32.520 and do that.
00:03:33.540 She would just drink
00:03:34.220 like half a bottle of vodka
00:03:35.300 and be like,
00:03:36.100 miss, can I axe you a question?
00:03:38.160 Education was way better
00:03:39.720 when the teachers
00:03:40.300 were kind of racist.
00:03:42.100 Well, at her school,
00:03:43.700 one of the kids held a banana
00:03:45.100 to a teacher's head
00:03:46.600 and was like, 1.00
00:03:47.460 you're dead, bitch. 1.00
00:03:48.920 Just held a fucking banana 1.00
00:03:50.320 to her head. 1.00
00:03:50.720 That's not helping the whole,
00:03:52.020 you know,
00:03:53.020 not the best.
00:03:54.320 It was one of the ghetto schools. 0.76
00:03:55.700 Black kid holding a banana.
00:03:58.660 She took me to a parent teacher,
00:04:00.760 or not parent teacher,
00:04:01.600 to like,
00:04:01.900 take your kid to work day.
00:04:03.340 Oh, you told me about this.
00:04:04.440 And some kid,
00:04:05.300 like a black kid, 0.96
00:04:07.060 and he talked like this. 0.95
00:04:08.080 See, mama,
00:04:08.860 no, I didn't.
00:04:12.920 She doesn't. 1.00
00:04:14.380 No, he's like a fucking grade 10, 0.99
00:04:16.220 and I was like eight years old, 0.99
00:04:17.880 and he just whipped a ball
00:04:19.460 of like clay at my head.
00:04:22.360 And my mom was just like, 0.98
00:04:23.720 get out of here
00:04:24.280 and just said the N-word.
00:04:25.100 No, she didn't.
00:04:25.980 Did it get a laugh, though,
00:04:27.220 when you got hit in the head?
00:04:28.640 Kind of,
00:04:29.160 but there was like a lot of girls 1.00
00:04:30.280 in the class,
00:04:30.800 and they were just like, 1.00
00:04:31.420 yo, what the fuck? 0.99
00:04:32.140 I'm like, 1.00
00:04:32.480 she,
00:04:33.080 you're like,
00:04:33.480 she,
00:04:33.740 that's not funny at all.
00:04:34.880 That was the money
00:04:35.500 the last time I was at Red Lobster.
00:04:37.860 Probably just happy
00:04:38.640 it wasn't being whipped at their head.
00:04:43.340 Is that running?
00:04:44.400 Yeah.
00:04:45.340 That's my biggest fear.
00:04:47.180 Doing a podcast,
00:04:47.960 you say something funny,
00:04:49.040 and then you're like,
00:04:49.400 oh, no,
00:04:49.860 we didn't record it.
00:04:50.860 It's a good thing.
00:04:52.620 Yeah,
00:04:53.040 so my mom 0.97
00:04:54.440 was racist against blacks. 0.80
00:04:57.040 No, she wasn't.
00:04:57.880 Yeah, but it's okay now.
00:04:58.440 She actually was not racist
00:04:59.800 against blacks at all.
00:05:00.820 She wasn't,
00:05:01.260 she just,
00:05:01.960 she was just normal,
00:05:02.720 like us.
00:05:03.740 She was our level of,
00:05:05.920 she was just like,
00:05:07.360 too racist.
00:05:08.000 Don't rope me into this.
00:05:10.040 Well, 1.00
00:05:10.300 she just found stupid shit funny, 1.00
00:05:11.900 but no. 1.00
00:05:12.180 She was normal.
00:05:13.340 She's not racist.
00:05:14.540 She wasn't racist in like a way
00:05:16.340 that it was,
00:05:17.020 you know,
00:05:18.420 evil.
00:05:20.300 It was more just,
00:05:22.600 I remember when the Afghan, 1.00
00:05:23.900 when the Afghans 0.82
00:05:24.920 started coming to her school.
00:05:26.260 That's when she got racist? 0.73
00:05:27.420 No,
00:05:27.700 she was like,
00:05:28.680 they're so nice.
00:05:30.060 I mean,
00:05:30.280 they wear that thing
00:05:31.120 on their head,
00:05:31.880 but oh,
00:05:32.920 they're just nice.
00:05:33.820 They're just nice girls 1.00
00:05:34.900 and then,
00:05:35.440 you know,
00:05:35.760 they just want to learn
00:05:36.720 because they weren't allowed
00:05:37.580 in their country,
00:05:38.340 so they just want to learn.
00:05:41.620 She'd just say 1.00
00:05:42.400 all kinds of shit like that. 1.00
00:05:43.820 It was always fucking hilarious, 0.99
00:05:46.200 but then she would tell, 0.97
00:05:47.040 I remember when I watched
00:05:47.940 Space Jam one,
00:05:49.000 like one of the first times
00:05:49.940 and I think she must have
00:05:50.700 been drunk
00:05:51.200 because she started like,
00:05:52.420 you know,
00:05:52.620 the beginning when it's like,
00:05:53.720 yeah,
00:05:55.520 like,
00:05:56.120 gonna get up,
00:05:57.240 gonna Space Jam.
00:05:58.640 Yeah,
00:05:58.880 yeah,
00:05:59.000 yeah,
00:05:59.160 she started like,
00:06:00.440 vibing and then she was like,
00:06:01.800 oh,
00:06:02.080 this reminds me of when I was
00:06:03.140 in university in Windsor
00:06:04.300 and we'd go over to Detroit 0.62
00:06:05.600 and dance with the black men 1.00
00:06:07.100 or some shit like that. 1.00
00:06:08.880 Like, 0.98
00:06:08.960 I'm pretty sure she got,
00:06:10.060 just ruining Space Jam 0.99
00:06:11.460 with a slutty memory 0.95
00:06:12.740 of going to Detroit. 0.91
00:06:14.000 I'm like seven
00:06:14.620 and my mom's just like, 0.81
00:06:15.520 this movie reminds me 1.00
00:06:16.700 when I sucked a black cock. 1.00
00:06:19.860 Yeah, 1.00
00:06:20.380 it was bad,
00:06:21.260 bad childhood,
00:06:21.860 but she was funny.
00:06:24.980 That was,
00:06:25.320 I mean,
00:06:25.620 I wasn't listening to it
00:06:26.880 being like,
00:06:27.560 what?
00:06:28.340 I was just like,
00:06:29.180 I thought my mom was cool.
00:06:30.240 I was like,
00:06:30.480 oh,
00:06:30.640 my mom like,
00:06:31.860 hung out with black people.
00:06:33.100 I just thought it was cool
00:06:33.860 because I knew my dad didn't.
00:06:35.960 Yeah,
00:06:36.100 your dad,
00:06:36.700 yeah,
00:06:37.040 believe it or not,
00:06:37.700 there's not a lot of black kids
00:06:39.540 learning violin,
00:06:40.320 I guess.
00:06:40.600 No,
00:06:40.960 he has,
00:06:41.420 but any of them that do,
00:06:42.880 he finds them
00:06:43.480 and he brings them in.
00:06:44.560 He finds them?
00:06:45.000 He finds them,
00:06:45.860 he brings them on his team
00:06:46.920 and he gets the appropriate
00:06:48.900 tax deduction,
00:06:49.900 the appropriate grant.
00:06:53.040 I would love to see your dad
00:06:54.460 trying to teach violin 0.95
00:06:55.520 to like a bunch of black kids 1.00
00:06:57.160 that don't want to learn. 1.00
00:06:57.820 Dude,
00:06:58.080 my,
00:06:58.340 well,
00:06:58.640 he went to Mexico
00:06:59.540 to teach a bunch of poor kids violin,
00:07:01.880 but he also,
00:07:03.300 he used to have a transgender assistant.
00:07:06.600 No.
00:07:06.900 That he got a grant for.
00:07:08.400 He got a grant for that though?
00:07:09.880 Yeah,
00:07:10.180 it was like a fat,
00:07:11.640 like 7K or something.
00:07:13.440 Seven grand?
00:07:15.240 That's not even that much money.
00:07:16.500 Well,
00:07:16.620 you have to get like a bunch of grants.
00:07:17.840 It's so amazing that he was like, 1.00
00:07:19.920 we got to cut his dick off. 1.00
00:07:21.800 Well, 1.00
00:07:21.820 the music festival was like,
00:07:22.800 oh,
00:07:23.120 well,
00:07:23.400 like they get grants every year
00:07:25.120 and just like any artistic organization
00:07:29.220 in Canada has,
00:07:30.360 survives off grants.
00:07:31.540 Yeah.
00:07:32.560 Unless you're,
00:07:33.800 you know,
00:07:34.260 me.
00:07:35.340 And so,
00:07:36.340 or any other artist
00:07:38.520 that's actually successful.
00:07:39.580 I mean,
00:07:39.860 in,
00:07:40.120 in like a popular way,
00:07:41.720 because if you're doing art
00:07:43.080 that's like painting 0.99
00:07:44.620 and shit, 0.98
00:07:45.180 like it's hard to just be like, 1.00
00:07:46.140 yeah,
00:07:46.320 oh my God,
00:07:47.460 have you heard of
00:07:48.180 Volodymyr Skolowski?
00:07:50.780 He paints buttholes.
00:07:53.180 It's incredible.
00:07:55.660 He's selling tickets now.
00:07:57.520 He's touring.
00:07:59.220 There's no way for those people
00:08:00.260 to make money,
00:08:00.700 so they have to do grants.
00:08:02.240 But then,
00:08:02.640 because Candace woke her,
00:08:04.360 woke her,
00:08:04.740 all the grants are like,
00:08:05.720 well,
00:08:06.440 yeah,
00:08:06.640 you got to have, 1.00
00:08:07.320 you got to have a fucking trans 1.00
00:08:09.540 on the team, 1.00
00:08:10.500 on the squad.
00:08:11.360 That's what's up though.
00:08:12.380 So my dad was cool with it though.
00:08:13.760 But it was just hilarious
00:08:15.300 because he would just 0.97
00:08:15.820 bitch her around 1.00
00:08:17.640 and just be like, 0.99
00:08:19.420 where is my coffee?
00:08:21.600 And just,
00:08:23.060 I had to do stand up
00:08:24.900 in front of the trans once
00:08:26.260 because,
00:08:27.060 That one?
00:08:27.880 Yeah,
00:08:28.280 my dad forced me to do this,
00:08:30.100 like the worst comedy gig,
00:08:31.420 but he's like,
00:08:31.800 I'll pay you.
00:08:32.720 Oh no,
00:08:33.220 how much did he pay you?
00:08:34.340 My dad literally rented out
00:08:36.520 Yuck Yucks Niagara
00:08:37.780 during the day.
00:08:40.320 So I had to see like Andreas
00:08:41.680 and like all the,
00:08:43.180 and they had to see me
00:08:44.260 in like wearing a dress shirt 1.00
00:08:46.740 with like a fucking blazer. 0.99
00:08:50.400 And I had to go 1.00
00:08:51.520 and do stand up
00:08:52.320 for no audience.
00:08:53.920 It was like a sit,
00:08:54.720 it was like I did,
00:08:55.760 it was like Kill Tony for nobody.
00:08:58.720 And,
00:08:59.220 and there was just like some guy
00:09:00.720 that my dad knows
00:09:01.580 who's like a local,
00:09:02.440 like rich guy 0.99
00:09:04.020 or some shit 0.99
00:09:04.560 being like, 0.99
00:09:05.040 so when did you get
00:09:06.240 into this kid?
00:09:07.360 Like it was like a,
00:09:08.040 you do a minute
00:09:08.740 and then you sit down
00:09:09.580 with this guy.
00:09:10.260 Oh Jesus Christ.
00:09:11.140 That was pretty funny.
00:09:12.880 And then his transgender assistant 0.97
00:09:14.960 was just there like,
00:09:16.160 okay,
00:09:16.580 I guess that's his stand up.
00:09:19.900 How much did he pay you
00:09:21.620 for that dude?
00:09:22.760 400 bucks.
00:09:28.820 From his music festival,
00:09:31.120 Music Niagara.
00:09:32.440 He was flying the dollars.
00:09:35.080 Do stand up for nobody
00:09:36.320 and then my trans assistant
00:09:37.680 will be upset.
00:09:37.880 How old were you?
00:09:38.620 Was he trying,
00:09:38.960 was this like around the time?
00:09:40.220 This is like three years ago.
00:09:41.800 Oh God.
00:09:43.400 It's like after the pandemic. 1.00
00:09:45.020 Fuck. 1.00
00:09:45.400 Do you have the controller 1.00
00:09:46.060 for the TV
00:09:46.640 because I'm worried
00:09:47.140 the reflection's going to show?
00:09:48.240 It's over there. 1.00
00:09:50.040 Fuck. 1.00
00:09:50.560 It's all the way over there, 1.00
00:09:51.440 dude.
00:09:52.260 Can you get it?
00:09:53.000 Turn it off.
00:09:54.600 You don't like seeing
00:09:55.760 things we'd,
00:09:57.440 you'd rather watch?
00:09:58.860 No.
00:09:59.220 No.
00:10:02.440 Give me it.
00:10:13.120 Camilla.
00:10:14.200 Camilla.
00:10:15.320 Camilla Harris 0.99
00:10:16.040 is just a terrible, 1.00
00:10:17.200 terrible person. 0.93
00:10:18.320 No offense
00:10:18.840 to anybody
00:10:19.520 who would be offended.
00:10:20.540 I mean,
00:10:20.960 if you're offended by that,
00:10:22.080 then you're obviously
00:10:22.880 going to vote for her.
00:10:24.400 The thing is that
00:10:25.480 she wants to ruin the country. 1.00
00:10:29.240 Everybody knows it.
00:10:30.860 She wants to do the same thing 1.00
00:10:32.360 that that loser 0.99
00:10:33.900 Keir Starmer 0.99
00:10:35.640 in the UK is doing.
00:10:38.080 And by the way,
00:10:38.560 I've said this before,
00:10:39.300 but anybody confused
00:10:41.180 as why the UK
00:10:41.960 is falling apart,
00:10:42.720 you guys elected
00:10:43.780 a guy named Keir.
00:10:45.340 A grown man named Keir.
00:10:47.280 You know, 0.99
00:10:47.600 Keir means cock 0.99
00:10:48.520 cock in Farsi. 0.99
00:10:50.080 If your name's Keir,
00:10:51.200 you should only really
00:10:52.240 live to about
00:10:53.280 seven years old.
00:10:54.520 Okay?
00:10:54.880 That's not,
00:10:55.480 it's not a grown man's name,
00:10:56.960 Keir.
00:10:57.460 Keir.
00:10:58.600 I don't care.
00:10:59.640 Keir,
00:10:59.920 and then now you have
00:11:00.580 this other guy
00:11:01.300 in Brazil
00:11:02.240 who looks like Voldemort
00:11:03.980 and he's
00:11:05.520 coming down hard
00:11:07.380 on Twitter,
00:11:08.640 on X.
00:11:09.140 He's banned Twitter
00:11:09.980 and X in Brazil.
00:11:11.560 And Camilla wants 1.00
00:11:13.720 to do the same shit 1.00
00:11:14.900 in America. 1.00
00:11:15.940 Everybody knows it.
00:11:17.220 The liberals know it.
00:11:18.240 They want it.
00:11:19.280 The right wing knows it.
00:11:20.580 They're terrified.
00:11:22.240 And can we just
00:11:23.260 get it over with?
00:11:24.940 What?
00:11:25.400 Like end freedom?
00:11:26.960 Just put us
00:11:28.560 in the North Korea
00:11:29.900 style camps.
00:11:31.200 Like why,
00:11:31.520 we've been edging
00:11:32.620 communism for the last
00:11:33.980 like decade.
00:11:35.000 Just,
00:11:35.480 what do you mean
00:11:35.840 just do it?
00:11:36.520 We don't want that to happen.
00:11:37.660 We don't want it,
00:11:38.400 but I mean,
00:11:39.680 just do it for like
00:11:40.280 a couple years
00:11:40.840 and then people will revolt.
00:11:42.060 Oh yeah,
00:11:42.540 yeah,
00:11:42.740 they'll revolt.
00:11:43.420 No,
00:11:43.560 they won't.
00:11:44.280 We already saw that
00:11:45.400 with COVID
00:11:45.860 that people won't revolt.
00:11:47.140 They don't really do
00:11:48.220 anything to stop
00:11:50.300 what's happening.
00:11:51.620 In Canada,
00:11:52.480 it's even worse
00:11:53.380 and people are just,
00:11:55.300 it's just embarrassing.
00:11:56.300 I mean,
00:11:56.560 Jagmeet Singh went on stage
00:11:58.140 on TV
00:11:59.720 talking about
00:12:00.500 how much the price
00:12:01.460 of potatoes,
00:12:02.600 he's holding up
00:12:03.100 a bag of apples.
00:12:05.140 I mean, 1.00
00:12:05.800 these people are morons 1.00
00:12:07.800 for the most part 1.00
00:12:09.560 and Americans are smarter
00:12:13.240 than everybody says
00:12:14.340 is what I think
00:12:15.520 and I think that they know
00:12:16.760 that this is happening
00:12:17.620 and I think a lot of people
00:12:19.040 are going to stand up for it
00:12:20.000 and if you look on Facebook
00:12:20.960 or wherever you see,
00:12:22.380 like I posted something
00:12:23.620 on Facebook recently.
00:12:24.660 It was a promo video
00:12:25.680 where it was that video
00:12:27.380 where Hillary's like, 0.95
00:12:29.680 and then it's over to AOC
00:12:31.320 and she's like,
00:12:32.140 and it looks like 0.98
00:12:33.640 they're jerking people off 0.95
00:12:34.760 and then they pass it 0.97
00:12:35.540 to the next
00:12:36.100 and then it's me.
00:12:36.940 I made the video
00:12:37.880 where it's me doing my,
00:12:39.600 promoting my dates
00:12:41.140 and that video has like
00:12:43.080 a shit ton of views
00:12:43.980 on Facebook
00:12:45.040 and I got like 4,200 likes on it
00:12:47.260 and there's just a shit ton
00:12:48.680 of people commenting
00:12:49.480 being like,
00:12:51.680 you know,
00:12:52.760 oh,
00:12:53.460 these Trumpers,
00:12:54.700 these Trumpers
00:12:55.620 and then you look
00:12:56.120 at their profile
00:12:56.620 and it's like a garden
00:12:58.240 or like it's like a picture
00:12:59.380 of like a cat
00:13:00.160 or it's like a,
00:13:00.720 these people who want,
00:13:03.300 who hate Trump
00:13:04.060 are genuinely
00:13:05.600 disturbed
00:13:07.840 in the sense
00:13:08.620 that they're like 1.00
00:13:09.240 mentally fucked up 1.00
00:13:10.920 and they don't understand 1.00
00:13:12.400 the consequences
00:13:14.420 and they don't care
00:13:16.300 about the consequences
00:13:17.260 and if anything,
00:13:18.360 they actually,
00:13:18.900 some of them know
00:13:19.740 the consequences
00:13:20.340 and want that to happen.
00:13:21.620 They're like,
00:13:22.280 I know this is going
00:13:23.060 to be bad for people
00:13:24.000 who do comedy
00:13:25.760 or free speech
00:13:27.380 or whatever.
00:13:28.160 They don't want people
00:13:29.500 to have freedom of speech.
00:13:30.700 They want freedom of speech
00:13:31.820 to basically end
00:13:34.580 and it's the same thing
00:13:36.480 as COVID.
00:13:37.080 It's the same thing
00:13:37.860 when people during COVID
00:13:39.180 wanted you to stay inside
00:13:40.740 and they wanted
00:13:42.060 all the stores
00:13:42.720 to be closed
00:13:43.300 as long as possible
00:13:44.160 and when they were like,
00:13:44.920 we're going to open them
00:13:45.560 and like, 0.96
00:13:45.860 what are you crazy? 1.00
00:13:46.640 You're going to kill people. 1.00
00:13:47.980 Those people now want 1.00
00:13:50.500 to take away
00:13:51.840 freedom of speech.
00:13:52.720 That's their new thing
00:13:53.900 because they saw
00:13:55.540 the success of COVID
00:13:56.820 in terms of destroying
00:13:58.580 so many people's lives
00:13:59.460 and making people's lives worse
00:14:00.740 which makes more people's lives
00:14:02.620 similar to their lives
00:14:04.120 because their lives are bad
00:14:05.720 and that's why
00:14:07.020 people on the left
00:14:07.880 want to ruin everything
00:14:09.600 and vote for Kamala's
00:14:10.920 and for Trudeau's
00:14:12.460 and for Kears
00:14:13.660 and all these 0.99
00:14:15.240 shitty left-wing politicians 1.00
00:14:16.900 because they are sad, 0.99
00:14:18.500 depressed,
00:14:19.200 lonely, 1.00
00:14:19.900 loser, 1.00
00:14:21.700 like people who don't 1.00
00:14:23.820 have a lot of sex, 0.75
00:14:24.760 don't have a lot of interests,
00:14:26.560 don't have a lot of money
00:14:27.700 and they just see people
00:14:29.740 who have money,
00:14:30.680 have interests,
00:14:31.320 have sex, 0.84
00:14:32.560 have opinions,
00:14:35.120 have platforms
00:14:36.460 as their enemy,
00:14:38.780 their personal enemy.
00:14:40.320 Anybody who took a bad situation
00:14:42.920 and made something good out of it
00:14:44.500 is an enemy to them.
00:14:46.720 That's why so many people hated me
00:14:48.240 during the pandemic 0.99
00:14:48.960 who were all losers 0.98
00:14:49.840 and like in the Toronto comedy scene 0.96
00:14:51.960 that saw me gaining success 0.99
00:14:54.200 and they still fucking hate me. 0.99
00:14:55.480 I mean, 0.99
00:14:55.620 some of them now are like,
00:14:56.580 oh,
00:14:56.700 can I open for you?
00:14:58.180 But they still hate me
00:15:00.360 because they
00:15:01.880 and a lot of people
00:15:03.940 saw COVID
00:15:04.680 as an opportunity
00:15:05.580 to do nothing
00:15:06.560 and not have to feel bad about it
00:15:08.320 and be able to be like,
00:15:09.580 look,
00:15:09.780 everybody's doing nothing
00:15:10.720 so if I do nothing,
00:15:11.680 it's the same.
00:15:12.600 Why is this guy doing something?
00:15:14.280 Why is this Ben Bankis guy
00:15:15.460 performing shows outside?
00:15:16.860 Why is this Ben Bankis guy
00:15:18.040 creating a following
00:15:19.900 when everybody else has given up? 1.00
00:15:22.140 What a piece of shit. 1.00
00:15:23.260 Fuck him. 1.00
00:15:23.740 So that's now happening 1.00
00:15:26.840 on a bigger scale
00:15:29.340 with freedom of speech
00:15:31.780 and the idea that
00:15:33.420 if Trump wins,
00:15:35.720 people are going to be allowed
00:15:36.580 to say whatever they want.
00:15:37.980 It's like, 0.99
00:15:38.340 these people are actually crazy 0.98
00:15:40.080 to not look at themselves 0.99
00:15:41.120 in the mirror
00:15:41.580 and be like,
00:15:42.040 yo,
00:15:42.240 you're literally
00:15:42.960 everything that's wrong
00:15:44.700 with the world right now
00:15:46.720 and Kamala is like
00:15:48.780 your spokesperson
00:15:49.380 which is just disturbing
00:15:51.500 and she wasn't even elected.
00:15:54.300 She was never elected.
00:15:56.080 She was chosen by Biden
00:15:57.360 and then she was chosen
00:15:58.700 to be the nominee.
00:16:00.960 She was never elected.
00:16:01.900 She never went through
00:16:02.900 the normal nomination
00:16:06.560 to become the leader
00:16:09.580 of the Democratic Party.
00:16:10.860 She never did that. 0.99
00:16:12.080 It's crazy what's happened
00:16:13.380 and if you say that
00:16:15.280 to a liberal,
00:16:15.800 they're like,
00:16:16.300 well,
00:16:16.580 yeah,
00:16:16.860 but you have to understand
00:16:17.900 that we need to beat Trump
00:16:19.140 and that's the most important thing.
00:16:20.840 It's like,
00:16:21.360 so they'll do anything.
00:16:23.240 It doesn't,
00:16:23.600 they don't,
00:16:23.920 they want,
00:16:24.680 like you said,
00:16:25.220 it's like,
00:16:25.440 why don't we just do communism?
00:16:26.480 They do want to do that.
00:16:28.340 That is exactly
00:16:29.060 what will happen
00:16:30.140 in the next year and a half.
00:16:32.500 Like if,
00:16:33.340 my predictor is
00:16:34.500 if Kamala wins,
00:16:36.760 she's going to
00:16:37.600 almost immediately
00:16:38.380 try to shut down Twitter.
00:16:39.580 she's going to immediately
00:16:41.220 make
00:16:42.180 all Facebook
00:16:44.600 and all these companies
00:16:45.660 either do what they did
00:16:46.860 in Canada
00:16:47.300 where they have to pay money
00:16:48.480 to posts
00:16:50.860 or like to,
00:16:52.000 to like some sort of tax
00:16:53.860 or the,
00:16:55.920 and,
00:16:56.640 or they're going to try
00:16:57.700 to make it so
00:16:58.840 that they have just like less,
00:17:01.620 like more censorship
00:17:02.480 and less freedom of speech
00:17:03.800 on those platforms.
00:17:05.360 The only saving grace
00:17:06.340 and one of the coolest thing
00:17:07.340 that's,
00:17:07.660 one of the coolest things
00:17:09.000 that's happened recently
00:17:10.100 is that Mark Zuckerberg
00:17:12.460 came out
00:17:13.180 and was basically like,
00:17:14.700 yo,
00:17:15.240 I'm sorry about the pandemic.
00:17:17.200 I was wrong.
00:17:18.640 I censored stuff
00:17:19.900 that I shouldn't have censored
00:17:21.000 and I worked
00:17:22.100 with the Biden-Harris administration
00:17:24.600 to censor people
00:17:25.800 and censor opinions
00:17:27.240 and censor doctors
00:17:28.200 and censor podcasts
00:17:29.300 and censor all this stuff
00:17:30.380 on my platform
00:17:31.360 and it was wrong.
00:17:33.480 And,
00:17:33.720 thank God for Dana White
00:17:35.520 because Dana White
00:17:36.840 is low-key saving the world
00:17:40.340 and people don't even realize this
00:17:42.200 by basically
00:17:43.100 just being a cool guy
00:17:45.260 and having the UFC
00:17:46.880 and getting so many celebrities involved
00:17:49.860 and bringing people
00:17:52.080 like Mark Zuckerberg
00:17:53.200 who all of a sudden
00:17:54.320 like a few years ago
00:17:55.280 was like,
00:17:55.720 I'm interested in jujitsu
00:17:56.900 and started doing jujitsu
00:17:58.160 and then got really into it
00:18:00.160 and then obviously got into UFC
00:18:01.800 and then he's like,
00:18:04.300 oh,
00:18:04.420 I'm rich.
00:18:04.880 I can just go to UFC.
00:18:06.060 Oh,
00:18:06.180 I can be backstage
00:18:06.860 and then it's like,
00:18:07.720 yeah,
00:18:07.860 but now everybody's calling you 1.00
00:18:09.040 a little bitch 1.00
00:18:09.800 when the cameras are off 1.00
00:18:11.620 and everything's off
00:18:12.420 and Dana White's sitting there 0.82
00:18:13.720 and Trump comes in the room
00:18:14.780 and they go, 1.00
00:18:15.320 you're a little fucking bitch. 1.00
00:18:17.260 You know what you did. 1.00
00:18:18.260 You worked behind our backs 1.00
00:18:20.100 to fuck us over, 1.00
00:18:21.400 to take away free speech 1.00
00:18:22.960 and Mark Zuckerberg's sitting there
00:18:25.640 like, 1.00
00:18:25.980 fuck, 1.00
00:18:26.940 I want to be a cool kid. 1.00
00:18:28.360 I want to be cool.
00:18:29.720 I want you guys to respect me.
00:18:31.540 That's why he said the N-word
00:18:32.420 in that video.
00:18:33.420 Yeah,
00:18:33.580 he pretty well,
00:18:34.360 yeah,
00:18:34.720 that's debatable
00:18:35.260 if he said the N-word or not,
00:18:36.320 but I mean,
00:18:37.240 look,
00:18:37.720 I said I want Kamala to say it.
00:18:39.140 I want everybody to say it.
00:18:39.980 I want Mark Zuckerberg to say it.
00:18:41.540 If we all say it.
00:18:42.240 Everybody say it.
00:18:42.740 Hallelujah.
00:18:43.360 I want Trump to say it.
00:18:44.660 We should all say the N-word
00:18:45.900 every day of the week.
00:18:47.400 Yay, yay, yay.
00:18:48.720 I want the Jews to say it. 0.98
00:18:50.140 I want the Palestinians to say it. 0.97
00:18:51.600 Why don't the Palestinians say 1.00
00:18:52.900 the N-word with the Jews 0.67
00:18:54.020 and then everything will be solved?
00:18:57.860 I think that Dana White
00:19:00.660 really brought Mark Zuckerberg
00:19:03.300 into that inner circle
00:19:04.420 and made him realize
00:19:05.960 how much of a mistake
00:19:06.780 he was making
00:19:07.400 siding with the liberals
00:19:08.460 who aren't cool. 1.00
00:19:10.020 They're not going to get him pussy. 1.00
00:19:11.160 I mean, 1.00
00:19:11.680 he's married to some,
00:19:12.940 you know, 0.95
00:19:13.800 boring looking Chinese woman, 1.00
00:19:15.740 but he's a fucking billion bajillionaire. 1.00
00:19:19.240 There's no, 1.00
00:19:19.880 I doubt it
00:19:21.860 that he's like,
00:19:23.180 I bet even now
00:19:24.360 he's like probably,
00:19:25.320 he's got the kind of money
00:19:26.980 where he would talk to his wife
00:19:28.200 and be like,
00:19:28.600 look, 1.00
00:19:29.120 I'm going to go fuck people. 1.00
00:19:30.860 Like, 1.00
00:19:32.160 I don't want to get divorced
00:19:33.380 because you're taking everything,
00:19:34.400 but just like enjoy.
00:19:35.660 Enjoy this
00:19:36.380 hundred million dollar house
00:19:38.380 for the weekend
00:19:39.180 while I go out with Dana White.
00:19:40.800 Hell yeah. 1.00
00:19:41.400 And watch him punch his wife 1.00
00:19:42.820 in the face. 0.94
00:19:43.200 Which is why Dana White's a cool dude.
00:19:46.860 Pretty much.
00:19:47.420 I mean,
00:19:47.580 everyone saw that.
00:19:48.240 She punched him first. 0.98
00:19:49.280 Exactly.
00:19:49.860 And he retaliated
00:19:50.960 and
00:19:51.540 It's protect yourself at all times.
00:19:53.560 Hey,
00:19:54.360 you don't punch,
00:19:56.080 if you're the wife of the owner of UFC 1.00
00:19:58.420 and you fucking smack him in public, 1.00
00:20:00.220 like you don't think, 1.00
00:20:01.480 Yeah.
00:20:01.840 Like what do you think
00:20:02.520 He likes Jon Jones for a reason.
00:20:05.100 Either way.
00:20:05.900 Maybe not the best,
00:20:09.260 best thing to talk about
00:20:11.200 in terms of,
00:20:12.260 Mark Zuckerberg says the end
00:20:13.320 where Dana White hits his wife.
00:20:14.980 We're going back to the 50s.
00:20:16.320 This is what I'm saying.
00:20:17.060 Communism's over.
00:20:17.800 So,
00:20:18.460 it's done.
00:20:18.900 The saving grace
00:20:19.880 and why I'm talking about this
00:20:21.360 is if Kamala wins now,
00:20:23.380 she's going to have a harder time 1.00
00:20:24.880 reeling in Facebook
00:20:26.500 and Instagram
00:20:27.640 because Zuckerberg
00:20:29.220 is basically like,
00:20:30.140 yo,
00:20:30.720 I'm for the boys now. 1.00
00:20:32.340 I'm trying to get pussy. 1.00
00:20:33.880 I'm trying to look cool. 1.00
00:20:35.200 I'm trying to wear
00:20:35.640 chains.
00:20:36.980 I'm trying to like,
00:20:37.900 It is sad to see him
00:20:39.080 try to look cool.
00:20:40.320 Well,
00:20:40.760 it kind of looks like Macklemore.
00:20:41.600 It's less sad than him
00:20:42.960 before being like,
00:20:44.580 looking like an alien
00:20:45.720 in that.
00:20:46.280 Remember when he was on
00:20:47.440 trial basically
00:20:49.460 with the
00:20:50.420 like
00:20:51.340 Supreme Court
00:20:52.680 or what was it?
00:20:53.340 The Congress.
00:20:54.420 Yeah.
00:20:55.060 He had to do a hearing
00:20:56.220 about the whole COVID thing
00:20:57.360 and he was like,
00:20:57.860 Oh,
00:20:58.060 I had no idea.
00:20:59.200 And then he,
00:20:59.560 yeah,
00:20:59.720 he knew everything.
00:21:01.000 He knows what he's doing
00:21:02.160 and if he would just,
00:21:04.160 if they would just work
00:21:05.400 with Trump
00:21:05.880 a little bit,
00:21:07.000 like even making it even
00:21:08.340 will make Trump win.
00:21:09.900 That's the crazy part
00:21:10.900 is they know that
00:21:11.620 they can't just make it fair
00:21:13.240 because if it's fair,
00:21:14.860 Trump will win every time.
00:21:16.200 So they have to be
00:21:17.680 one-sided.
00:21:18.820 Now,
00:21:19.060 so that's that.
00:21:20.620 And now I'm seeing
00:21:21.720 this other thing
00:21:22.360 with the Alexa.
00:21:23.940 Like,
00:21:24.080 have you seen this?
00:21:24.600 Amazon Alexa.
00:21:25.820 What about it?
00:21:26.360 If you ask an Amazon Alexa,
00:21:28.800 why is Donald Trump
00:21:31.560 a good candidate?
00:21:32.620 It will say,
00:21:34.160 we're not allowed
00:21:36.400 to give political,
00:21:38.220 political opinions.
00:21:40.360 But if you ask about Kamala,
00:21:41.740 does it go,
00:21:43.020 Oh,
00:21:43.220 this is why?
00:21:44.080 Yeah.
00:21:44.460 It goes,
00:21:44.740 she's a great candidate. 1.00
00:21:46.500 So,
00:21:46.900 and there's tons of like
00:21:47.860 instances of that
00:21:48.680 with like chat GPTs
00:21:49.960 and different AIs.
00:21:51.380 And,
00:21:51.580 and it's so obvious now
00:21:53.740 where we're in this
00:21:56.560 weird situation
00:21:58.840 where,
00:21:59.580 like I said before,
00:22:01.000 the liberals know
00:22:02.520 this is happening
00:22:03.400 and they're,
00:22:04.000 they're for it
00:22:05.020 because they're basically,
00:22:06.320 it's like when somebody's
00:22:08.080 bloodthirsty
00:22:08.820 and they're like,
00:22:09.540 I don't care anymore.
00:22:11.040 You know,
00:22:11.680 it's like,
00:22:12.260 please,
00:22:12.600 I have a child.
00:22:13.700 And they're like,
00:22:14.260 no,
00:22:14.920 like that's how the left is
00:22:16.960 where they're basically like,
00:22:19.020 you know,
00:22:19.460 they're like,
00:22:19.840 but you're manipulating the media
00:22:21.260 and you're making all the social media
00:22:24.180 one-sided
00:22:24.880 and your companies like Amazon
00:22:27.060 are 100% behind one candidate
00:22:29.160 and they're pushing that agenda.
00:22:30.780 And then the liberals are like,
00:22:32.060 I don't care.
00:22:33.100 That's how we're going to win.
00:22:34.260 It is funny that,
00:22:35.420 that Amazon is trying to like act liberal
00:22:37.760 when it's like literal slave labor
00:22:39.420 in the warehouses.
00:22:41.500 Yeah.
00:22:42.080 I mean,
00:22:42.380 it's literally slavery.
00:22:44.320 Yeah.
00:22:45.120 And Jeff Bezos is like,
00:22:46.640 yo,
00:22:46.780 we got to get Kamala.
00:22:47.640 Which is why it's such a good business.
00:22:49.520 That's why you got to vote Kamala 0.85
00:22:50.740 if you're really racist.
00:22:52.880 Vote Kamala Harris
00:22:53.820 if you're in favor of modern day slavery,
00:22:57.360 such as Amazon,
00:22:59.720 Walmart.
00:23:01.200 I'd like to see Joe Rogan
00:23:03.520 host the debates this year.
00:23:05.900 They've talked about that for years,
00:23:07.540 but on his podcast though,
00:23:08.780 and it's Trump and Kamala.
00:23:12.060 Trump has already said that he would do it.
00:23:13.640 He said he would do it with Biden.
00:23:14.960 He said he would do it before with,
00:23:16.760 I'm pretty sure with Hillary. 0.93
00:23:18.220 I'm pretty sure.
00:23:19.440 Yeah.
00:23:19.780 And Rogan invited them both.
00:23:22.520 But Rogan said like,
00:23:24.280 I won't just have Trump on.
00:23:26.480 For sure.
00:23:27.520 You won't have both.
00:23:27.780 Which is also,
00:23:28.300 I think that it's partly
00:23:29.540 because Rogan's like,
00:23:30.320 I don't want to help him get elected.
00:23:31.500 But it's like,
00:23:31.880 just do it. 1.00
00:23:32.880 Just fucking do it. 0.99
00:23:33.780 Yeah, do it, dude. 0.99
00:23:34.380 But I mean,
00:23:34.920 that's what's awesome
00:23:36.000 about Trump's strategy right now
00:23:37.920 is he's pretty much
00:23:38.820 approaching the presidency.
00:23:39.940 Like he's got a Netflix special
00:23:41.720 dropping in a few weeks.
00:23:42.900 Like he's like,
00:23:43.660 I'm going on Theo Vaughn.
00:23:45.420 I'm going on Lex Friedman.
00:23:46.840 I'm going on,
00:23:47.540 he's going on all these podcasts
00:23:49.060 that are like comedy podcasts
00:23:51.880 and Joe Rogan podcasts.
00:23:54.440 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:23:55.960 And that's awesome.
00:23:57.080 Meanwhile, Kamala, 0.97
00:23:58.000 her whole strategy 0.59
00:23:58.680 is just going on stage
00:23:59.720 in Detroit and be like,
00:24:01.340 beat him in tiny, tiny,
00:24:02.320 go me in tiny, tiny, 1.00
00:24:03.400 oh, she, my fucker. 1.00
00:24:07.120 Which is not a bad strategy. 1.00
00:24:09.000 I kind of wouldn't make it.
00:24:09.500 The more you say this,
00:24:11.280 the more I wish I could vote for her
00:24:13.480 for fun.
00:24:14.520 The more I'm like,
00:24:15.960 it's the,
00:24:16.940 because in 2016,
00:24:18.480 Trump was the funny one
00:24:19.760 to vote for.
00:24:20.820 But now,
00:24:21.660 because the logic.
00:24:22.980 She's not really the funny,
00:24:24.060 like she's not funny though.
00:24:25.700 Like she's not trying to be funny.
00:24:27.100 That's the,
00:24:27.420 the creepy part about it is like,
00:24:29.420 I mean,
00:24:29.660 Trump goes up there 1.00
00:24:30.360 and actually says funny shit. 1.00
00:24:32.260 I mean, 0.99
00:24:32.920 the act of voting for her,
00:24:34.280 like being just like a straight guy.
00:24:36.120 I guess it's funny,
00:24:36.820 but it's more like,
00:24:38.500 it's not funny,
00:24:39.200 ha ha.
00:24:39.680 It's like funny,
00:24:40.440 like funny,
00:24:41.140 funny,
00:24:41.600 weird.
00:24:42.600 That was the whole thing.
00:24:43.740 Oh, 0.97
00:24:44.460 the Republicans are all weird. 0.99
00:24:47.540 They're so weird. 0.99
00:24:48.820 They're just weird.
00:24:49.740 It's like, 1.00
00:24:50.100 Kamala has a fucking, 1.00
00:24:51.720 looks like she has a wig on. 1.00
00:24:53.780 Her face looks like it's falling off.
00:24:55.800 Her neck looks like it was stapled in 1.00
00:24:57.800 with a fucking, 1.00
00:24:59.060 I don't know how many Ozempic shots 1.00
00:25:01.260 she's on a fucking day. 1.00
00:25:03.200 And that Tim Walls guys, 1.00
00:25:04.740 Tim Walls looks really racist. 0.82
00:25:06.520 He looks like a, 0.99
00:25:07.400 he looks like a bald Hitler, 1.00
00:25:09.140 bald fat Hitler. 1.00
00:25:09.800 He looks so mad that he's 0.99
00:25:11.800 gotta be vice president 0.99
00:25:13.400 to a black woman if he wins. 0.98
00:25:15.100 Yeah. 0.99
00:25:15.260 Like he looks like he's trying to lose.
00:25:17.100 So he doesn't have to be subservient 0.99
00:25:18.600 to a black woman for four years. 0.94
00:25:21.340 But if,
00:25:22.220 but Trump did,
00:25:24.520 or sorry,
00:25:24.940 Rogan did invite Trump
00:25:27.220 and the other candidates
00:25:29.460 every single time,
00:25:30.960 including,
00:25:31.880 I guess,
00:25:32.500 the last time Biden
00:25:33.780 to debate each other.
00:25:35.600 and it's the Democrats
00:25:37.280 every time
00:25:38.140 who don't want to do that
00:25:39.360 because they,
00:25:41.400 their media training
00:25:43.300 is the old school media training
00:25:45.120 of like the interview
00:25:47.360 that Kamala did on CNN 0.95
00:25:48.920 or whatever it was.
00:25:50.320 Everything's edited.
00:25:51.700 It's only 19 minutes of her
00:25:54.500 and like,
00:25:55.580 she's actually only speaking
00:25:57.340 like 12 minutes of that.
00:26:00.100 The other half is just
00:26:01.280 the other person asking questions
00:26:02.580 and it's all edited.
00:26:03.740 If they know,
00:26:05.680 and that's why 0.97
00:26:06.200 they're shitting their pants. 0.73
00:26:07.340 I think it's September 10th 0.98
00:26:08.640 coming up
00:26:09.380 is going to be the first
00:26:10.760 and possibly only debate,
00:26:12.940 which is pretty unheard of.
00:26:14.260 They're so close.
00:26:15.080 They should have done it
00:26:15.760 on the 11th.
00:26:16.440 For a presidential election,
00:26:18.360 they should have,
00:26:19.380 I mean,
00:26:19.660 for some states,
00:26:20.880 it'll probably bleed over.
00:26:21.740 But I mean,
00:26:22.060 it's kind of funny
00:26:22.660 to watch all the highlights
00:26:23.500 on the 11th too.
00:26:24.580 No, 9-11.
00:26:25.480 Like,
00:26:25.680 because all day,
00:26:26.620 like from the morning.
00:26:27.620 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:26:28.180 Never forget.
00:26:29.260 Yeah,
00:26:29.660 never forget.
00:26:30.240 And then it's just going to be
00:26:30.980 Trump saying hilarious stuff.
00:26:32.580 It's going to be Trump.
00:26:33.260 If Trump calls her
00:26:34.240 the N-word on live TV,
00:26:35.800 he's winning.
00:26:37.540 He would have to do
00:26:38.420 non-hard R though.
00:26:39.560 He'd have to just say,
00:26:40.680 ah.
00:26:41.140 At this point,
00:26:41.720 he's been shot
00:26:42.380 and sent to jail.
00:26:43.380 At this point,
00:26:44.240 he gets the hard pass.
00:26:46.320 I do think
00:26:47.060 that
00:26:48.100 this,
00:26:50.220 like,
00:26:50.820 I don't know.
00:26:51.620 It's going to be split 0.96
00:26:52.480 even with black people 0.99
00:26:53.420 because
00:26:55.640 there's a lot of black people
00:26:57.560 who are just like,
00:26:58.220 I can't vote Trump
00:26:59.280 because he is,
00:27:00.660 because of,
00:27:01.220 even if they don't believe
00:27:02.460 the truth,
00:27:03.760 they just,
00:27:04.180 they don't like Kodak black.
00:27:06.080 Well,
00:27:06.420 like,
00:27:06.660 cool black people will,
00:27:07.920 like, 0.83
00:27:08.660 cool black people will,
00:27:10.000 but like, 1.00
00:27:10.400 loser blacks 1.00
00:27:11.180 will vote for fucking Camelot. 1.00
00:27:14.580 Loser blacks. 1.00
00:27:16.040 Like, 1.00
00:27:16.340 black people who are just like, 1.00
00:27:17.580 oh well, 0.99
00:27:18.140 I don't look,
00:27:18.680 like,
00:27:18.940 you know,
00:27:19.220 just like nerdy. 0.98
00:27:20.500 Like a black, 1.00
00:27:21.080 kind of like black 0.94
00:27:21.860 and you're like,
00:27:22.640 just in a GameStop all day.
00:27:24.340 Like, 0.98
00:27:24.580 if you're black 0.95
00:27:25.100 and you're like, 0.87
00:27:25.600 actually black
00:27:26.280 and you're like,
00:27:26.960 like,
00:27:27.520 like the video
00:27:28.180 that I saw earlier.
00:27:29.280 Like LA Fitness black 0.99
00:27:29.600 versus like,
00:27:31.140 Nintendo Switch black.
00:27:32.880 No,
00:27:33.460 more like
00:27:34.340 calling the police
00:27:36.680 at a Red Lobster
00:27:38.160 because
00:27:38.520 they said it was
00:27:40.300 unlimited shrimp
00:27:41.180 and then it was,
00:27:41.840 like that level of black 1.00
00:27:43.320 will vote Trump.
00:27:44.440 But then 0.98
00:27:45.160 blacks who go 1.00
00:27:46.980 to like Equinox, 0.99
00:27:49.120 their vote,
00:27:49.520 yeah,
00:27:49.860 or not,
00:27:50.520 like LA Fitness
00:27:51.140 will vote Trump. 0.95
00:27:52.480 Equinox blacks 1.00
00:27:53.240 are voting Camelot.
00:27:54.720 I didn't even know
00:27:55.420 they lent blank people
00:27:56.560 into Equinox.
00:27:57.460 I thought that's why
00:27:57.960 it was so expensive.
00:27:59.240 It's a recent thing.
00:27:59.940 I thought that's why
00:28:00.440 it was like 200 bucks a month.
00:28:01.960 Yeah,
00:28:02.440 no, 0.92
00:28:02.740 it's for the whites only. 0.85
00:28:03.720 I think it's even more 0.84
00:28:04.380 than that now.
00:28:05.360 But, 1.00
00:28:05.840 damn. 1.00
00:28:06.320 No, 1.00
00:28:06.480 it's definitely not whites only,
00:28:07.580 unfortunately.
00:28:08.420 No,
00:28:08.640 obviously,
00:28:09.220 I don't think that
00:28:09.980 that should be a thing.
00:28:11.060 But,
00:28:11.500 I do think that
00:28:13.940 all the comics,
00:28:16.580 especially like
00:28:17.340 the Kill Tony,
00:28:18.820 like David Lucas,
00:28:20.880 like,
00:28:21.080 just comics
00:28:21.920 who are like
00:28:22.320 cool people
00:28:22.860 who are black 0.98
00:28:23.740 are going to vote 1.00
00:28:24.240 for Trump.
00:28:25.800 And,
00:28:26.160 pretty much
00:28:26.620 of any race
00:28:27.940 that are cool people,
00:28:29.080 all the cool people
00:28:30.320 are voting Trump.
00:28:31.900 All the people 1.00
00:28:32.440 who get tons of pussy 1.00
00:28:33.540 and party 1.00
00:28:35.000 and have multiple houses
00:28:38.460 and,
00:28:39.000 you know,
00:28:40.280 wealthy people
00:28:41.040 for the most part
00:28:42.280 of voting Trump,
00:28:42.920 except,
00:28:43.360 especially new wealthy,
00:28:44.920 people who just got rich
00:28:46.620 or like,
00:28:47.480 you know,
00:28:47.700 but if your parents were rich
00:28:49.080 and you were just a rich kid
00:28:50.500 and you got,
00:28:51.240 those kids are going to vote
00:28:52.300 for Kamala
00:28:52.780 because they're just 0.77
00:28:53.520 spoiled brats. 0.87
00:28:54.700 And, 0.76
00:28:55.200 it's the same thing
00:28:55.820 like I talked about before.
00:28:57.120 They want to see
00:28:58.800 other people suffer
00:29:00.620 and the rich kids,
00:29:03.440 like the kids
00:29:04.360 whose parents were rich,
00:29:05.660 like Kamala's stepdaughter
00:29:07.000 who looks super woke,
00:29:09.160 she hates the rich kids 1.00
00:29:12.180 who are like, 1.00
00:29:12.960 fucking let's go 0.99
00:29:13.620 on the yacht 1.00
00:29:14.660 and drink
00:29:16.000 and do, 0.55
00:29:16.520 she hates those people 0.99
00:29:17.620 because she's like,
00:29:18.620 wasn't invited,
00:29:19.580 wasn't invited,
00:29:20.680 but had enough money
00:29:21.500 to be invited,
00:29:22.160 but just wasn't invited.
00:29:23.600 Those are the people
00:29:24.220 who are voting for Kamala,
00:29:25.760 but it's really coming up
00:29:27.500 real soon
00:29:28.180 and it's going to have
00:29:28.840 a huge impact on comedy.
00:29:30.720 It's going to be great.
00:29:32.080 It's going to be fun
00:29:32.840 and exciting,
00:29:33.580 but depending,
00:29:34.820 like I said,
00:29:35.600 if she wins,
00:29:37.240 it could actually destroy
00:29:39.460 tons of people's careers,
00:29:42.920 tons of comics.
00:29:43.840 It could destroy my career.
00:29:44.900 It could make something
00:29:46.480 like the Monkey Face video,
00:29:48.080 like hate speech in America,
00:29:50.120 but if that becomes a thing.
00:29:51.920 It would be funny
00:29:52.540 to see Kamala Harris
00:29:53.560 on stage
00:29:54.420 and using your Monkey Face video
00:29:56.700 as the example for.
00:29:58.460 You're like,
00:29:58.800 this is why we got,
00:29:59.460 we got to,
00:30:00.340 it would be kind of hard
00:30:02.200 to argue against.
00:30:06.080 Is this comedy?
00:30:08.580 But it is.
00:30:11.700 I mean,
00:30:12.020 obviously,
00:30:12.960 but it would be funny
00:30:14.680 if that's how you got
00:30:16.420 that mainstream recognition
00:30:17.720 is Kamala Harris.
00:30:21.000 It's even funny
00:30:21.440 just sitting here
00:30:22.080 and being like,
00:30:22.580 it is comedy,
00:30:23.760 you know,
00:30:24.000 you just have to understand
00:30:24.980 that doing blackface 1.00
00:30:26.460 with a monkey
00:30:26.940 and then doing
00:30:27.480 a Chinese accent
00:30:28.200 is-
00:30:28.340 There's a nuance to it.
00:30:29.280 It's art.
00:30:30.720 Look,
00:30:30.960 the nuance is that
00:30:31.960 it's so racist
00:30:33.000 that it's not racist.
00:30:35.600 Because it is,
00:30:36.580 it's just so-
00:30:38.080 It's like putting on
00:30:38.740 a fat suit.
00:30:39.740 It's like, 0.90
00:30:40.460 if you put on a fat suit,
00:30:41.720 it's like putting on 0.93
00:30:42.320 a fat suit,
00:30:42.960 but you're just 1.00
00:30:43.320 painting your face black.
00:30:45.360 Yeah, 0.97
00:30:45.600 well,
00:30:45.800 that's-
00:30:46.560 But that's how Trudeau
00:30:48.160 keeps winning,
00:30:48.780 so-
00:30:48.960 Look,
00:30:49.520 that's why I voted for him.
00:30:51.760 I think Kamala Harris
00:30:52.920 should do blacker face. 1.00
00:30:54.640 Dude, 0.98
00:30:55.240 she does blackface, 0.99
00:30:56.180 but it's just, 0.92
00:30:56.740 she calls it black, 0.58
00:30:57.900 and then they go, 0.90
00:30:58.420 are you in blackface?
00:30:59.260 She goes,
00:30:59.520 it's blacker face.
00:31:00.700 Yeah.
00:31:01.560 No,
00:31:01.820 that's when she says
00:31:02.620 the hard R.
00:31:04.120 Drake did it.
00:31:05.600 That's true.
00:31:06.260 Look where he is.
00:31:07.020 That's fact.
00:31:07.860 He's on, 1.00
00:31:08.560 he's having sex with kids. 1.00
00:31:09.880 That's as successful 1.00
00:31:10.580 as you get in this country.
00:31:12.180 As a Jewish man,
00:31:13.000 that's-
00:31:13.420 That's literally-
00:31:14.420 That's top of the game.
00:31:14.800 That's top of the game,
00:31:16.380 dude.
00:31:17.280 If you're rich enough 0.99
00:31:19.060 to bang kids, 0.96
00:31:19.940 and then still- 0.96
00:31:20.420 He probably has an island
00:31:21.160 that nobody even knows about.
00:31:22.360 Dude,
00:31:23.960 Drake Isle.
00:31:25.460 But,
00:31:25.980 if I was a kid 0.98
00:31:26.660 and I got raped by Drake, 1.00
00:31:27.700 I'd be so happy. 1.00
00:31:30.240 He's a good looking,
00:31:31.280 I mean, 0.96
00:31:31.560 you could be molested 0.98
00:31:32.360 by some creep. 0.96
00:31:35.040 I don't think 0.99
00:31:35.800 he's really fucking kids. 0.99
00:31:36.880 I think he's just 1.00
00:31:37.560 fucking young chicks. 1.00
00:31:39.220 No, obviously. 1.00
00:31:39.940 And I think that-
00:31:40.580 It's funnier to think that.
00:31:42.460 I think that Kendrick
00:31:43.760 and all those guys
00:31:44.480 are just jealous
00:31:45.120 because-
00:31:47.000 Because they're trying
00:31:47.620 to sleep with kids.
00:31:48.640 Yeah.
00:31:49.260 And they think at Kendrick-
00:31:50.220 Why don't these kids 1.00
00:31:50.820 want to fuck me? 1.00
00:31:51.320 And Kendrick is 5'2". 1.00
00:31:52.360 They think he's one of them.
00:31:53.680 He looks like a kid.
00:31:54.560 So he doesn't even feel
00:31:55.280 like pedophilia.
00:31:55.800 But hasn't he been married forever 0.53
00:31:57.340 and he's just in a boring
00:31:58.600 relationship?
00:32:00.440 Yeah, he's just like
00:32:00.840 a Christian dude
00:32:01.500 that does push-ups.
00:32:03.040 Yeah.
00:32:03.900 Yeah.
00:32:04.800 And that's the thing.
00:32:05.780 I mean,
00:32:05.920 everybody gets to-
00:32:06.780 I mean,
00:32:07.020 I get to a point
00:32:09.560 where I'm on tour
00:32:10.800 and I'm like,
00:32:11.360 you want to show you
00:32:12.760 to go to bed?
00:32:13.500 This isn't that fun.
00:32:14.920 I'd like to go out,
00:32:16.340 but-
00:32:17.780 Tell me you find
00:32:19.780 a playground.
00:32:21.460 Yo. 0.58
00:32:22.880 There's a pretty sick
00:32:23.700 playground next to
00:32:24.460 the Crown Plaza.
00:32:25.600 Oh, Dougie.
00:32:26.600 Let's find a Chuck E. Cheese
00:32:27.500 in every city.
00:32:28.120 Phoenix, Arizona.
00:32:35.060 I have been traveling a lot
00:32:36.600 and doing a lot of
00:32:37.360 really cool shows.
00:32:38.020 Yeah, you've been traveling
00:32:38.800 a lot, dude.
00:32:39.460 I have been.
00:32:40.700 I'm very grateful
00:32:41.700 to my fans
00:32:42.800 and you guys listening
00:32:44.060 and for coming
00:32:46.840 to support me
00:32:47.700 at the shows.
00:32:49.060 I mean, 0.99
00:32:49.200 the shows are fucking, 0.99
00:32:50.200 honestly, 0.99
00:32:50.700 my shows
00:32:51.160 are pretty phenomenal.
00:32:53.840 They're better than,
00:32:56.000 I'd say,
00:32:56.700 90% of comedy shows
00:32:58.060 I've been to.
00:32:58.540 I've been to a few
00:32:59.300 comedy shows
00:33:00.340 of other successful comedians
00:33:01.840 and mine has
00:33:03.860 one of the best vibes
00:33:05.140 you can go to
00:33:06.500 and it's fun
00:33:08.480 because right now
00:33:09.540 there's still that
00:33:10.480 5% of the audience
00:33:12.000 that is probably liberal
00:33:14.060 because they just didn't,
00:33:15.300 they just bought tickets.
00:33:16.060 They basically
00:33:16.420 go on a website,
00:33:17.820 they see Ben Bankas,
00:33:18.900 they click my name,
00:33:19.820 they see 220,000 followers,
00:33:21.740 they're like, 1.00
00:33:22.040 fuck it, 1.00
00:33:22.320 I'm going. 1.00
00:33:23.060 Let's just go to this.
00:33:24.460 This guy's funny
00:33:25.240 and then it's just me
00:33:27.800 being like, 1.00
00:33:28.460 you're a fucking retard 1.00
00:33:29.380 and then everybody 1.00
00:33:31.660 laughs at them
00:33:32.300 and then they feel
00:33:33.160 like they should leave
00:33:33.860 but then they don't
00:33:34.700 because they're cheap
00:33:35.980 and they spent 25 bucks
00:33:37.820 so they have to stay
00:33:38.600 but the vibes 0.97
00:33:40.060 are really fucking fun. 0.71
00:33:42.560 I don't know 0.91
00:33:43.260 when the last pod,
00:33:44.300 where we had been.
00:33:47.400 Arizona?
00:33:48.160 The last pod
00:33:49.280 was in Arizona
00:33:49.860 so we did the Arizona shows,
00:33:51.480 came back for a week,
00:33:54.020 did a bunch of shows
00:33:55.180 in town,
00:33:57.120 did Hans Kim's show
00:33:58.940 in Austin.
00:34:01.160 We lined up for
00:34:02.160 Kill Tony twice now 0.99
00:34:03.540 which is a fucking 1.00
00:34:04.220 absolute nightmare 0.99
00:34:05.100 and I personally,
00:34:06.400 I don't want to line up anymore.
00:34:08.080 I might even just tell
00:34:09.240 my manager like,
00:34:11.040 look,
00:34:11.580 I'm not lining up
00:34:12.520 for this anymore.
00:34:13.660 Get me as a guest
00:34:14.720 in 2025.
00:34:15.400 I'm going to take a ticket
00:34:17.220 but I do feel that
00:34:19.480 I actually like lining up
00:34:21.440 as much as it's annoying.
00:34:22.580 I like the excitement
00:34:25.260 of maybe I'll get pulled
00:34:27.220 and if I do get pulled,
00:34:29.200 you know,
00:34:29.660 I know that Tony knows me
00:34:32.100 so he'd be like,
00:34:32.880 yo,
00:34:33.040 come to Mitzi's and stuff
00:34:34.120 and come hang out after.
00:34:37.900 So it's just kind of a fun time
00:34:39.220 especially if you're there,
00:34:40.200 it's a fun time. 0.99
00:34:41.080 Being alone there sucks 0.86
00:34:42.300 because if you don't know 0.98
00:34:43.740 what Kill Tony is,
00:34:45.080 it's one of the most popular
00:34:46.880 comedy shows right now
00:34:49.100 on anywhere
00:34:50.500 on the YouTube.
00:34:51.880 It's on YouTube.
00:34:53.260 They've been doing
00:34:54.280 doing it for like 10 years.
00:34:56.360 They've been doing it
00:34:56.740 over 10 years.
00:34:57.600 I believe just in the last few years
00:34:59.420 blown up
00:35:00.280 and now they're doing it
00:35:02.280 at Madison Square Garden.
00:35:04.840 Yeah,
00:35:05.000 they're selling out like
00:35:05.960 HGP Center on New Year's.
00:35:08.080 It's a huge,
00:35:08.660 it's a big deal
00:35:09.860 and basically any person
00:35:11.300 can sign up
00:35:12.020 if you have a driver's license
00:35:13.280 and you wait in line,
00:35:14.800 you sign up,
00:35:15.340 put your name on the list.
00:35:16.380 I enjoy waiting in line with you
00:35:17.980 because we get to
00:35:18.920 look at comedians
00:35:20.420 that have been doing it
00:35:21.240 for a year and less
00:35:23.140 and tell them
00:35:24.680 that they have no hope
00:35:26.080 and that we don't want
00:35:27.120 to be their friend.
00:35:27.700 Yeah,
00:35:27.820 the last Kill Tony
00:35:28.560 we signed up for
00:35:29.240 this guy came up to us
00:35:30.580 and he was like
00:35:31.560 one of those awkward,
00:35:32.600 he had like that awkward autism
00:35:33.940 where he's like,
00:35:34.720 uh,
00:35:35.080 hey,
00:35:35.680 uh,
00:35:36.240 yeah,
00:35:36.540 and he was like,
00:35:37.320 I didn't sign up
00:35:38.560 because I forgot my wallet
00:35:39.920 at home
00:35:40.340 and I didn't have my ID
00:35:41.260 but I thought I'd stay
00:35:42.860 and network
00:35:43.520 so what are your names
00:35:46.360 and then I just,
00:35:47.200 before I even answered him,
00:35:48.340 I just go,
00:35:49.260 how many years
00:35:49.800 have you been doing comedy,
00:35:50.720 kid?
00:35:51.520 And he goes,
00:35:52.200 a year and a half.
00:35:53.540 I was like,
00:35:54.120 you don't want to talk to us.
00:35:55.360 Yeah,
00:35:55.680 you don't want to talk to us.
00:35:56.560 You go talk to somebody else.
00:35:57.700 He was like,
00:35:58.140 I thought we were all doing comedy
00:35:59.760 and it's like,
00:36:00.520 no,
00:36:00.800 no,
00:36:01.000 no,
00:36:01.100 no,
00:36:01.420 no,
00:36:01.680 we're doing comedy.
00:36:02.900 I'm trying to make it.
00:36:03.760 you're,
00:36:04.820 you're trying to meet friends
00:36:08.120 and,
00:36:08.500 and,
00:36:09.020 and people that are just 1.00
00:36:10.520 as retarded as you 1.00
00:36:11.540 and we're just not 1.00
00:36:12.580 as retarded as you. 1.00
00:36:13.740 We're not, 0.99
00:36:14.200 so we're not going to be able
00:36:15.000 to be your friend.
00:36:15.880 We don't want to be friends
00:36:16.720 with anyone.
00:36:17.400 We actually want to use people.
00:36:19.000 It's like Drake.
00:36:19.760 To get ahead.
00:36:20.400 No,
00:36:20.700 no new friends.
00:36:21.420 Well,
00:36:21.520 that's the thing with female comics 1.00
00:36:22.700 and sometimes,
00:36:23.440 I mean,
00:36:24.700 there's female comics
00:36:25.780 that are funny out there.
00:36:27.040 I'm not saying there aren't,
00:36:28.040 but especially the new
00:36:29.700 open mic female comics,
00:36:31.160 they just have this air about them
00:36:33.000 where they're just like
00:36:33.820 the wide eyed thing
00:36:35.100 and they're just like,
00:36:35.940 and,
00:36:36.100 and why aren't you being nice to me?
00:36:37.620 It's like,
00:36:37.880 because, 1.00
00:36:38.360 because your vagina 1.00
00:36:39.720 means nothing to me, 1.00
00:36:40.720 slut. 1.00
00:36:42.460 Well, 0.99
00:36:43.100 it's not that.
00:36:44.140 It's more that
00:36:45.120 there are very few female comics
00:36:48.060 that will help you
00:36:48.980 in your career.
00:36:50.800 No offense.
00:36:51.940 I don't know if anybody's
00:36:53.020 offended by that,
00:36:53.880 but even the successful
00:36:55.820 female comics
00:36:56.660 and I'm talking,
00:36:57.700 I'm not even talking about that.
00:36:58.960 I'm talking about like
00:36:59.560 just low level
00:37:00.480 open micers
00:37:01.300 who are like,
00:37:03.000 why,
00:37:03.260 why would you say that to me?
00:37:04.580 Like,
00:37:04.920 I,
00:37:05.300 like,
00:37:05.920 Armand was on stage
00:37:06.640 at a show
00:37:07.080 and this open micer
00:37:08.800 I had a conversation with
00:37:09.720 like once
00:37:10.540 outside of a show
00:37:11.820 while having a cigarette
00:37:12.620 and not even like
00:37:14.260 an interesting conference,
00:37:15.000 just like,
00:37:15.480 oh yeah,
00:37:16.000 how long?
00:37:16.640 Oh,
00:37:17.000 seven months.
00:37:17.740 Oh,
00:37:17.960 cool.
00:37:19.200 Anyway,
00:37:19.600 so Armand's on stage
00:37:20.900 doing well
00:37:21.740 in a tough room,
00:37:24.240 Maggie Mays,
00:37:25.180 which is across
00:37:25.860 from the mothership
00:37:26.820 in Austin
00:37:27.460 and this girl
00:37:28.800 comes up to me
00:37:29.380 and goes like,
00:37:29.980 how,
00:37:30.500 like,
00:37:30.700 how long is he doing?
00:37:31.980 Like,
00:37:32.420 how much time
00:37:33.220 does he have up there?
00:37:34.160 And I was like,
00:37:34.640 I looked at the clock,
00:37:35.480 I'm like,
00:37:35.700 I'm pretty sure
00:37:36.120 he's only been on
00:37:36.680 for like nine minutes.
00:37:37.480 He has a 10 minute spot
00:37:38.420 and she was like,
00:37:39.420 oh,
00:37:39.680 that's how many men's
00:37:40.520 and just like
00:37:41.740 got all like angry 0.99
00:37:42.640 and shit 0.99
00:37:42.980 and I was like, 1.00
00:37:43.560 and then she talked
00:37:44.480 to both of us
00:37:45.060 after and was like,
00:37:46.040 oh, 1.00
00:37:46.240 this guy was such a dick 1.00
00:37:47.300 to me 1.00
00:37:47.560 and then I hit her 0.94
00:37:49.560 and then I hit her. 0.78
00:37:52.120 No,
00:37:52.860 no,
00:37:53.140 obviously not.
00:37:53.660 No,
00:37:53.680 he did it.
00:37:54.260 But I wanted to though.
00:37:55.600 so he,
00:37:56.420 no,
00:37:57.660 but it is.
00:37:58.020 That's not what happened,
00:37:58.600 but that was the imagination
00:38:01.680 that happened
00:38:02.420 in Armand's head,
00:38:03.520 but no,
00:38:05.640 but after,
00:38:06.840 you know,
00:38:07.280 she was kind of pissed 0.93
00:38:07.940 and I was like,
00:38:08.320 look,
00:38:08.520 I don't really care
00:38:09.340 and the thing is
00:38:12.220 that that,
00:38:12.960 if we,
00:38:13.440 if you had been nice
00:38:14.080 to that girl 0.88
00:38:14.580 and just like,
00:38:15.660 oh my God,
00:38:16.360 like I know
00:38:16.960 he's doing so much time.
00:38:18.340 What's wrong with him?
00:38:19.760 Like,
00:38:19.900 oh my God.
00:38:21.040 What is she going to do?
00:38:23.040 And this is like,
00:38:24.100 this is,
00:38:24.560 this is something
00:38:25.020 that happened to me
00:38:26.300 recently when I was in New York.
00:38:30.100 I was in New York City
00:38:31.320 and two months
00:38:33.700 before my show in New York,
00:38:34.740 I got a message
00:38:35.360 from a fan
00:38:36.080 who was like,
00:38:37.100 basically,
00:38:37.660 I'm,
00:38:38.160 I have a bit of money.
00:38:39.180 I'm,
00:38:39.400 you know,
00:38:39.620 I'm kind of well,
00:38:40.320 like low key.
00:38:41.740 Didn't,
00:38:42.220 in one way or another,
00:38:43.480 basically explain to me
00:38:44.340 that I'm kind of wealthy,
00:38:45.900 I have money
00:38:46.320 and I have a really nice apartment
00:38:47.960 in Manhattan
00:38:48.960 and I'd love if you stayed there.
00:38:51.340 I'll put you up in my place 0.53
00:38:52.800 for free
00:38:53.400 when you go and do your New York show
00:38:55.800 and I stayed for one night
00:38:57.560 and got there.
00:39:00.960 Nice Jewish guy.
00:39:03.060 He's,
00:39:03.540 you know,
00:39:04.060 in his 50s
00:39:05.460 and beautiful condo building
00:39:08.780 with amazing amenities,
00:39:10.880 pool,
00:39:12.040 amazing gym,
00:39:13.500 like amazing.
00:39:14.600 with a sauna,
00:39:16.040 wet sauna,
00:39:16.880 dry sauna,
00:39:18.000 the whole nine yards,
00:39:20.460 everything in Jew could ever have. 0.99
00:39:22.060 The most Jewish apartment.
00:39:24.060 Well,
00:39:24.520 no,
00:39:24.720 just like a really,
00:39:26.160 just like a nice building
00:39:27.300 with nice amenities.
00:39:29.120 He did buy me the Wuhan shirt,
00:39:30.800 which helped me go viral.
00:39:31.560 That did help you,
00:39:32.340 yeah,
00:39:32.540 to be fair,
00:39:33.120 Ricky.
00:39:33.280 He's a really good guy.
00:39:34.440 He is a nice guy.
00:39:35.220 I mean,
00:39:35.480 his daughter,
00:39:36.400 but my point is
00:39:37.460 about women and men,
00:39:38.800 this is the point,
00:39:39.460 is that he was like,
00:39:41.180 excited to introduce me
00:39:42.460 to his daughter
00:39:43.000 and she's just like,
00:39:43.960 oh yeah, 1.00
00:39:44.240 you're like some loser comic 1.00
00:39:45.720 that like, 1.00
00:39:46.260 that's what she said?
00:39:46.960 No,
00:39:47.240 but her vibe,
00:39:47.940 her vibe was,
00:39:48.660 her vibe was like,
00:39:49.380 oh, 1.00
00:39:49.580 you're like this loser comic 0.99
00:39:50.780 that my dad likes 0.99
00:39:51.580 and he's like helping you
00:39:52.740 like,
00:39:53.100 ew,
00:39:53.880 you know,
00:39:54.440 and then,
00:39:55.140 so that was whatever
00:39:56.660 and then I go back,
00:39:58.120 he comes to my show,
00:39:59.340 he hangs out with me,
00:40:00.280 we watch the show,
00:40:01.080 he's super nice about it
00:40:02.200 and,
00:40:03.440 you know, 1.00
00:40:04.960 we talk shit about it 0.99
00:40:05.920 on the way, 0.99
00:40:06.420 we walk back to his place
00:40:07.720 after and then his girlfriend comes
00:40:11.580 and he had been through a divorce
00:40:14.180 or whatever
00:40:14.620 and then now,
00:40:15.560 hell yeah,
00:40:16.500 he has this girlfriend
00:40:17.600 who's around his age,
00:40:19.880 maybe late 40s,
00:40:21.020 early 50s,
00:40:21.900 yeah,
00:40:22.840 French Canadian,
00:40:24.440 not Jewish 0.82
00:40:25.500 and,
00:40:27.020 because his ex-wife was Jewish,
00:40:29.820 right,
00:40:30.040 like his dog,
00:40:30.680 but like,
00:40:31.040 this woman's not Jewish
00:40:31.820 and she's just,
00:40:33.440 anyway,
00:40:33.720 it doesn't matter
00:40:34.160 if she's not Jewish 0.50
00:40:34.720 or Jewish
00:40:35.260 but the point is
00:40:36.320 that she comes to the house,
00:40:38.220 we're like smoking outside
00:40:39.900 and then she comes 1.00
00:40:41.860 and he's like so excited
00:40:43.820 for her to come,
00:40:44.580 so excited to introduce me to her
00:40:46.440 and then she comes 1.00
00:40:48.220 and she's just kind of like,
00:40:50.500 she's like,
00:40:51.160 so I want to do something,
00:40:52.780 I want you to take me somewhere
00:40:54.040 and I was like,
00:40:55.140 hey,
00:40:55.300 if you guys want to go out,
00:40:57.220 I'll like chill at the house,
00:40:58.300 I'll stay in your apartment
00:40:59.560 and jack off 0.70
00:41:00.440 while you guys leave,
00:41:02.520 stop translating everything properly,
00:41:05.160 well,
00:41:07.280 but even just like,
00:41:08.200 it was nice,
00:41:08.940 I literally would have just
00:41:09.760 laid down 0.99
00:41:10.780 and fucking went to sleep, 1.00
00:41:11.920 but she came, 1.00
00:41:12.880 the girlfriend,
00:41:14.240 and she wanted to go out
00:41:15.500 and he was,
00:41:16.060 I was like,
00:41:16.360 you guys can go out,
00:41:17.160 like I'm just going to chill,
00:41:17.880 he's like,
00:41:18.740 no,
00:41:19.020 no,
00:41:19.280 like whatever,
00:41:20.080 and then he's like,
00:41:21.320 let's go back downstairs
00:41:22.100 and smoke
00:41:22.820 and then figure it out
00:41:23.880 and he's like to her,
00:41:25.040 he's like,
00:41:25.260 you just settle in
00:41:26.180 and like,
00:41:27.140 you know,
00:41:27.420 you just got here,
00:41:28.200 you haven't been here
00:41:28.640 in a couple months,
00:41:29.440 like just,
00:41:30.640 because it's like their second home
00:41:31.800 or whatever,
00:41:32.400 right,
00:41:33.400 because they're from Montreal, 1.00
00:41:35.220 damn, 0.99
00:41:36.280 so we go back downstairs 1.00
00:41:38.960 and smoke,
00:41:39.980 oh no,
00:41:40.300 I'm right before that,
00:41:41.460 he's like,
00:41:42.040 we're going to go smoke outside
00:41:43.360 and she's just like,
00:41:44.840 rolls her eyes
00:41:45.860 and she's like,
00:41:46.940 kind of like laughs to herself
00:41:48.680 and he's like,
00:41:49.140 what?
00:41:49.900 She's like,
00:41:50.480 this looks at me like,
00:41:52.260 this has been his little project
00:41:54.740 for a long time,
00:41:56.420 he's been working
00:41:57.080 and I'm thinking like,
00:41:58.960 little project as in me
00:42:00.180 staying here for one night?
00:42:01.420 He might have tried 1.00
00:42:02.760 to make you fuck his wife 1.00
00:42:04.680 in front of him or something, 1.00
00:42:05.800 maybe that was his project,
00:42:07.280 dude.
00:42:07.620 No,
00:42:07.940 no,
00:42:08.200 definitely not,
00:42:08.980 that was not the vibe at all,
00:42:10.300 that would have been,
00:42:12.440 that would have been
00:42:13.080 almost less awkward 0.99
00:42:14.180 if that was the fucking vibe, 0.98
00:42:15.780 but the vibe was more like, 0.99
00:42:18.300 the vibe was more like,
00:42:20.160 he told her,
00:42:20.800 he's been telling her
00:42:21.440 about this for months,
00:42:22.320 he's excited,
00:42:23.120 he loves my comedy
00:42:24.080 and she's just,
00:42:25.600 the whole time being like,
00:42:26.980 I don't know,
00:42:27.980 you bring the guy,
00:42:29.180 for sure,
00:42:30.160 anyway,
00:42:30.400 so she's like,
00:42:31.040 your little project
00:42:32.000 and kind of like,
00:42:32.880 belittled him in front of me,
00:42:34.960 which is something women love doing. 1.00
00:42:36.760 Women love, 0.92
00:42:37.600 they love to belittle men who,
00:42:40.060 and anyway,
00:42:40.640 so then we go downstairs
00:42:41.440 and I'm talking to him about it
00:42:42.540 and I'm like,
00:42:43.440 you know why she's like that? 1.00
00:42:44.940 You know why women are like that? 1.00
00:42:46.420 Because they don't understand
00:42:47.820 why men help other men.
00:42:52.580 They don't get it.
00:42:53.460 Like in their heads,
00:42:54.200 they're just like,
00:42:54.740 why would you help,
00:42:55.900 and the same with his daughter,
00:42:56.820 they're like,
00:42:57.260 why are you helping this guy?
00:43:00.460 And it's like,
00:43:01.400 and he,
00:43:01.940 you know,
00:43:02.360 not just because he's Jewish,
00:43:04.420 you know,
00:43:05.040 that's part of it,
00:43:05.780 I'm sure,
00:43:06.240 is like,
00:43:06.540 you know,
00:43:06.720 he sees another Jewish guy
00:43:07.880 trying to come up in art,
00:43:09.340 which Jews used to be 0.94
00:43:10.880 really involved,
00:43:12.120 they're still,
00:43:12.660 but like now,
00:43:13.960 especially young Jews, 1.00
00:43:14.920 they go to fucking commerce, 1.00
00:43:17.020 they study commerce. 1.00
00:43:18.020 They go to fucking jobs 1.00
00:43:18.980 where they make money 1.00
00:43:19.960 with assholes. 1.00
00:43:21.380 They just go to finance 1.00
00:43:22.300 and stuff
00:43:22.660 because they're like,
00:43:23.380 their parents are already rich
00:43:24.320 and they're like,
00:43:24.640 they're pushing them
00:43:25.580 to be rich.
00:43:26.660 They're not just,
00:43:27.980 there's less like middle class,
00:43:30.540 just kind of like whatever.
00:43:32.900 So,
00:43:34.400 that's part of it.
00:43:35.180 But anyway,
00:43:35.500 I was like,
00:43:35.940 women don't help other women, 1.00
00:43:37.860 like there's no rich woman out there 1.00
00:43:40.120 who's just rich off of her own thing 0.97
00:43:42.460 or like her parents' money
00:43:44.680 and continued working with the company
00:43:46.760 and is just like a big fan of comedy
00:43:49.540 and sees some female comic
00:43:51.680 coming through town
00:43:52.420 and is like,
00:43:52.780 hey girl, 0.93
00:43:53.680 do you want to stay in my place
00:43:54.880 and like hang out?
00:43:55.620 100%.
00:43:55.760 Because women don't think like that 1.00
00:43:58.420 and that's why they think that like men,
00:44:00.600 even like you,
00:44:01.260 I'm helping you
00:44:02.080 and this is something
00:44:03.460 that you're supposed to do in comedy
00:44:05.160 and then women are like, 1.00
00:44:07.540 why aren't there more women in comedy? 1.00
00:44:09.620 Because women don't help women in comedy. 1.00
00:44:11.900 There isn't, 1.00
00:44:12.400 there isn't a fucking girl, 1.00
00:44:14.460 female comic. 0.99
00:44:15.860 Every time a guy helps a woman.
00:44:16.760 You know what I mean?
00:44:18.380 Well, yeah,
00:44:18.720 and then if the guy helps the woman,
00:44:20.220 and that's why the guys won't help the women 1.00
00:44:22.480 because even if they don't want sex from the woman,
00:44:26.640 they feel like the outside world's like,
00:44:29.040 oh, what'd she have to do,
00:44:29.880 blow you? 0.97
00:44:31.180 It's like, yeah. 0.95
00:44:32.400 And then there's women who are like, 1.00
00:44:34.080 now it's like this thing where they're like,
00:44:35.460 I don't want to blow you to get ahead
00:44:36.940 and it's like,
00:44:37.380 well,
00:44:37.640 I guess you're not going to get ahead.
00:44:38.960 Should have learned from Camilla.
00:44:41.720 But,
00:44:42.320 I think she's blowed?
00:44:43.740 Oh, yeah.
00:44:44.120 Her whole thing was that she's like blown everybody all the way up. 1.00
00:44:47.200 No way.
00:44:47.940 Yeah,
00:44:48.160 that's where,
00:44:48.760 yeah.
00:44:50.440 That's like legit.
00:44:52.240 I mean,
00:44:52.500 that's a rumor or whatever,
00:44:53.640 but.
00:44:54.240 That's kind of sick.
00:44:55.640 But there are no women who are, 1.00
00:44:57.520 like,
00:44:57.780 okay,
00:44:58.060 Whitney,
00:44:58.400 Whitney Cummings,
00:44:59.080 for instance,
00:45:00.380 is she constantly hanging out with some younger comic? 0.63
00:45:03.460 No.
00:45:04.260 That's,
00:45:04.560 that's a female. 1.00
00:45:05.320 If anything,
00:45:05.880 she brings up male comics.
00:45:07.160 She brings up Tim Dillon.
00:45:09.160 She,
00:45:09.520 you know,
00:45:10.800 I guess a little bit of Annie Letterman.
00:45:13.120 But even Tim,
00:45:14.100 like, 0.93
00:45:14.420 the gay comics are the ones who have the responsibility to help out the Annie Lettermans. 0.93
00:45:19.520 Yeah. 0.81
00:45:19.840 And the other,
00:45:20.660 and the other female comics. 1.00
00:45:21.940 And even Whitney Houston,
00:45:23.080 like,
00:45:23.360 or Whitney Houston.
00:45:24.660 Whitney Houston.
00:45:25.860 Hey.
00:45:26.240 Hey.
00:45:26.800 Want to do coke?
00:45:27.360 R.I.P.
00:45:30.240 But Whitney,
00:45:30.840 Whitney Cummings,
00:45:31.680 who's very funny.
00:45:32.900 Oh,
00:45:33.060 she's great.
00:45:33.660 But there isn't,
00:45:34.620 and she's,
00:45:35.120 I mean,
00:45:35.360 she's so rich, 0.99
00:45:35.900 it doesn't even fucking matter. 0.99
00:45:37.100 But look at Bill Burr's at like a similar level. 0.97
00:45:40.060 And he constantly,
00:45:41.960 he's,
00:45:42.440 that other guy's podcast that he's always had open for him.
00:45:46.700 The Italian guy.
00:45:48.920 Bald guy. 0.82
00:45:49.260 Malastocco.
00:45:50.200 No.
00:45:50.380 Sebastian Malastocco?
00:45:51.160 No.
00:45:51.640 No.
00:45:52.020 Maniscalco has a guy that he helps out that's below him in comedy.
00:45:56.420 Even Maniscalco,
00:45:57.220 I think maybe doesn't help as much as some of the other guys.
00:46:00.040 But then look at Rogan.
00:46:01.200 He's the king of that.
00:46:02.280 Oh,
00:46:02.420 he is the king of giving.
00:46:02.880 And he does it for men and for women.
00:46:04.800 Oh,
00:46:04.900 yeah.
00:46:05.220 And for everybody.
00:46:06.260 But my point is,
00:46:08.100 there's no female comic at that. 0.99
00:46:11.000 Like,
00:46:11.240 I guess Whitney,
00:46:12.020 and she has men on, 0.66
00:46:13.000 but does she have,
00:46:15.500 she's got Hawk Tua on. 0.56
00:46:17.660 Right.
00:46:18.180 She's like,
00:46:18.780 whatever's hot,
00:46:19.460 let's do it.
00:46:20.060 Yeah.
00:46:20.420 You know,
00:46:20.680 whoever's hot,
00:46:21.520 this week it's Matt Reif,
00:46:22.880 next week it's Hawk Tua, 1.00
00:46:24.060 who gives a fuck. 1.00
00:46:24.840 And I get that. 0.99
00:46:25.540 Business is business.
00:46:25.920 Next week is Kamala Harris.
00:46:27.700 Business is business.
00:46:29.300 I get that.
00:46:31.000 But this is the thing,
00:46:32.640 like that guy in New York,
00:46:33.840 his girlfriend didn't understand,
00:46:35.980 and that his daughter didn't understand,
00:46:37.540 is like,
00:46:37.920 your dad has money,
00:46:40.060 your boyfriend has money,
00:46:41.780 and he doesn't,
00:46:44.880 he wants something more than that. 1.00
00:46:48.020 And it's not pussy. 1.00
00:46:49.780 It's not fucking you. 1.00
00:46:51.560 It's not, 0.98
00:46:52.260 you know,
00:46:52.500 for his daughter,
00:46:53.080 it's not getting you through college,
00:46:54.500 which he already did.
00:46:55.180 It's not you getting,
00:46:56.080 you already have your good job.
00:46:57.500 Yeah.
00:46:57.780 You already went to college.
00:46:58.820 He wants to help people who,
00:47:01.920 in his heart,
00:47:02.720 he looks,
00:47:03.280 he goes,
00:47:04.080 I want to help this guy.
00:47:05.160 Yeah.
00:47:05.640 And guys think like that.
00:47:07.260 Like when I saw you 0.99
00:47:08.440 at fucking Royal Comedy Theater, 0.99
00:47:10.420 and you know, 0.99
00:47:11.860 and I was like,
00:47:12.500 I want to help this kid.
00:47:13.640 I want to see what he's got.
00:47:14.940 Let's bring him to a show.
00:47:16.260 Bring him to Yoke Yoke's.
00:47:17.200 Does the guest spot. 0.99
00:47:18.240 Kills it. 1.00
00:47:19.120 Keeps killing it. 1.00
00:47:20.400 Rumor,
00:47:20.740 words getting out.
00:47:21.940 Perfect.
00:47:22.520 You're cool.
00:47:23.200 We can hang out.
00:47:24.140 We both like,
00:47:24.980 you know what I mean?
00:47:25.560 That doesn't happen.
00:47:29.100 No.
00:47:29.640 Within the,
00:47:30.220 in the female. 0.97
00:47:31.320 No,
00:47:31.780 women are more competitive. 1.00
00:47:33.560 Like men are competitive,
00:47:35.140 but they know how to be competitive.
00:47:37.760 But they team up.
00:47:38.580 Yeah,
00:47:39.020 that's what I mean.
00:47:39.500 They team up.
00:47:40.020 Like look at,
00:47:40.400 look at Shane.
00:47:41.100 Look how big of a team.
00:47:42.720 Shane's got a huge team.
00:47:43.960 We were just watching Tires.
00:47:45.140 Yeah,
00:47:45.360 dude,
00:47:45.600 he's got all those guys.
00:47:46.940 and he has layers.
00:47:47.820 Everybody has these layers of team.
00:47:49.480 You know,
00:47:49.600 he's got his really close friends,
00:47:51.100 McCusker,
00:47:52.160 McKeever,
00:47:53.320 those guys,
00:47:54.340 and then the like outer,
00:47:55.120 and then the other successful comics that he brings in,
00:47:57.560 like Schultz,
00:47:58.760 and what's the other guy's name?
00:48:01.240 Stavros.
00:48:01.880 Stavros.
00:48:03.180 You know,
00:48:03.640 there's layers to it.
00:48:06.160 I'm just,
00:48:06.960 you know,
00:48:07.440 my point in all this,
00:48:09.080 and it's even with the,
00:48:10.120 like it kind of relates to Kamala Harris potentially being president. 0.99
00:48:14.860 Who the fuck is she going to help? 0.98
00:48:18.060 Who does she even want to help? 1.00
00:48:19.840 She doesn't want to help anybody. 0.96
00:48:21.200 She wants to become president so she can be president. 1.00
00:48:23.500 Period.
00:48:24.480 And then people say that about Trump.
00:48:25.920 Oh, 0.99
00:48:26.080 he's a narcissist. 1.00
00:48:27.100 He's going to become a dictator. 0.98
00:48:29.020 He's good.
00:48:30.220 And the,
00:48:30.560 that's the,
00:48:31.140 Kamala posted that three days ago.
00:48:33.140 She posted day one of Trump presidency.
00:48:36.260 He will become a dictator.
00:48:38.000 How is that even,
00:48:39.240 how can you even say that?
00:48:40.220 He was already president and wasn't a dictator and got beat.
00:48:44.200 And he's,
00:48:44.900 you know what I mean?
00:48:45.440 So it's like some,
00:48:47.300 that's the projection.
00:48:48.800 Yeah.
00:48:48.980 It's like what women do. 1.00
00:48:50.080 Sometimes they project.
00:48:51.640 Yeah.
00:48:51.760 So it's like Kamala's projecting.
00:48:54.760 To,
00:48:55.240 Oh,
00:48:55.340 he's going to be a dictator.
00:48:56.220 No,
00:48:56.400 you're going to be a dictator.
00:48:57.980 You want to be a dictator.
00:48:59.720 You want to tell men what to do.
00:49:01.700 You want to tell everybody what to do.
00:49:03.680 You want all, 1.00
00:49:04.240 fuck that. 1.00
00:49:06.220 Yeah. 1.00
00:49:06.700 And you want to get rid.
00:49:07.560 And the way to do it,
00:49:09.000 like if you're the top,
00:49:10.680 if you're a woman president and you want to get rid of freedom of speech, 0.95
00:49:13.480 that is the exact same as being in a relationship with a woman who says,
00:49:18.980 I don't like when you say that.
00:49:20.320 I don't like when you do that.
00:49:21.860 I don't like that.
00:49:22.840 I don't like that. 1.00
00:49:23.780 That's the same fucking thing. 0.99
00:49:25.200 But now you have it on a fucking international level or national level. 1.00
00:49:29.560 You don't want that. 0.99
00:49:30.980 I think Kamala Harris gets pissed off when people call her ma'am. 1.00
00:49:34.700 Yes.
00:49:35.860 100%.
00:49:36.260 She has a huge.
00:49:37.760 She looks like she would start fights at Texas Roadhouse. 1.00
00:49:40.480 She has a huge.
00:49:44.880 Like there's a bunch of rumors.
00:49:46.420 I don't know what rumors,
00:49:47.060 maybe not rumors,
00:49:48.360 but I guess whatever.
00:49:49.560 People are saying that she is like super rude with her staff. 1.00
00:49:53.880 Really?
00:49:54.140 She's like really rude. 0.99
00:49:55.340 And like she has huge turnover rates with her staff and her campaign because 0.99
00:49:58.920 she just like reams people up. 1.00
00:50:00.200 That's always so common.
00:50:00.900 Because she also has a woman under her. 1.00
00:50:03.700 That wants her.
00:50:04.740 That looks at Kamala and goes,
00:50:06.180 I want your job.
00:50:07.540 Yeah.
00:50:08.020 There's no.
00:50:08.460 The woman under Kamala is not looking at Kamala going, 0.95
00:50:10.620 thank you so much for teaching me all this and getting me here and
00:50:13.420 believing me.
00:50:14.860 No. 1.00
00:50:15.620 It's I'm a bitch and this is my other bitch and she wants my job. 1.00
00:50:18.820 So she's going to take it out on you and all these bitches. 1.00
00:50:21.760 And it's just, 0.99
00:50:22.740 it's bad news bears.
00:50:25.820 Okay.
00:50:26.280 Let's just break it down to.
00:50:29.020 It's this.
00:50:30.160 This is bad news bears.
00:50:33.220 If she wins facts,
00:50:34.820 it's going to be bad.
00:50:35.980 And if she wins,
00:50:38.060 Trudeau will win forever.
00:50:40.440 All the liberal leaders will continuously win forever.
00:50:45.080 And she,
00:50:46.080 if she,
00:50:46.660 if she wins,
00:50:47.360 there potentially will never be a not liberal in office.
00:50:52.940 There won't be white people anymore. 0.93
00:50:54.460 If Kamala wins. 0.57
00:50:55.440 Maybe.
00:50:55.920 I don't know about that.
00:50:57.180 I feel like if she wins, 1.00
00:50:58.560 she's going to exterminate whites. 1.00
00:51:00.240 I think it's more that she's going to win and it's going to have this ripple effect 0.99
00:51:06.740 through every Western nation where they basically go, 0.89
00:51:09.120 this is,
00:51:10.220 you know,
00:51:10.360 because everybody follows America's lead is what we need. 0.99
00:51:12.660 We need a black lesbian. 1.00
00:51:13.940 Everybody follows America's lead. 0.98
00:51:16.580 And when America comes down on freedom of speech,
00:51:18.780 then everybody's going to feel like it's okay to do.
00:51:20.840 And then there's going to be nowhere to go because America is supposed to be the
00:51:24.960 most free,
00:51:25.980 the most all these things.
00:51:28.740 And it is when you live here and you're like,
00:51:30.960 for me as a Canadian moving to America,
00:51:33.180 you realize very quickly,
00:51:35.700 this is the better country.
00:51:37.960 They have the,
00:51:38.680 the,
00:51:39.080 the level of convenience.
00:51:41.440 I mean,
00:51:42.200 Toronto has convenience because it's a big city.
00:51:45.240 Um,
00:51:46.240 and,
00:51:46.540 and almost all,
00:51:47.300 but there's more places to live in America.
00:51:51.680 You don't have to just live in Montreal,
00:51:53.900 Toronto,
00:51:54.480 Vancouver,
00:51:55.100 Edmonton. 1.00
00:51:55.660 There's five fucking cities. 1.00
00:51:57.380 Otherwise there's no convenience. 1.00
00:51:59.320 You live in the middle of nowhere. 1.00
00:52:00.920 You have to plow your own fucking driveway. 1.00
00:52:03.620 It snows. 1.00
00:52:04.740 It's shit. 1.00
00:52:05.820 It sucks. 1.00
00:52:06.900 It floods. 0.99
00:52:08.080 I mean,
00:52:08.500 it floods here too.
00:52:09.360 We saw it in San Antonio,
00:52:10.440 but my point is that America is a great country.
00:52:14.880 Keep it great.
00:52:15.760 I talked to a Mexican Uber driver.
00:52:19.620 She told me that I'm allowed to vote.
00:52:21.680 So let's see.
00:52:22.960 What's voting Kamala?
00:52:24.640 Once I get my Texas ID,
00:52:26.480 which is in a couple of weeks,
00:52:28.460 I'm going to immediately vote for Trump.
00:52:32.340 I'm going to see.
00:52:32.940 Yeah.
00:52:33.180 I mean,
00:52:34.480 if I go to a place,
00:52:35.780 I'm like,
00:52:36.020 Hey,
00:52:36.200 I'm Canadian,
00:52:36.820 but I have this idea that,
00:52:37.840 yeah,
00:52:37.940 you can vote.
00:52:39.040 I have,
00:52:39.520 I do a joke about it.
00:52:40.340 That's like pretty funny that you're like,
00:52:42.060 you know, 1.00
00:52:43.160 fucking voter fraud, 1.00
00:52:44.360 but then you're like going to go commit voting. 1.00
00:52:47.020 Well,
00:52:47.340 I don't even think it is.
00:52:49.420 If it's voter fraud,
00:52:50.660 I don't want to do it,
00:52:51.460 but if it's legal,
00:52:52.620 I would do it.
00:52:53.380 Yeah.
00:52:53.700 So I don't know.
00:52:54.360 You guys in the comments,
00:52:55.220 it's illegal in the comments.
00:52:57.080 Let me know.
00:52:57.740 Is it legal to vote if you are a resident and you have a driver's license?
00:53:02.420 I don't know.
00:53:03.260 Do they check that you're a citizen?
00:53:04.820 I have no idea.
00:53:05.540 They don't even check if you're alive.
00:53:07.520 So pretty sure I could get away with it.
00:53:11.040 We'll see.
00:53:12.280 And a bunch of,
00:53:14.540 I have to go back to Canada this week. 0.96
00:53:16.580 It's going to suck,
00:53:18.080 but I mean, 0.83
00:53:19.000 only for a weekend.
00:53:19.840 Tell me you're not excited for Waterloo,
00:53:22.400 Ontario,
00:53:23.020 Waterloo,
00:53:24.040 Ontario and Hamilton,
00:53:25.200 Ontario all sold out.
00:53:26.220 I just saw a video of a daylight shooting in Hamilton.
00:53:29.260 Oh,
00:53:29.480 nice.
00:53:29.680 Just like on a busy street.
00:53:31.380 So super excited to be back in,
00:53:34.500 uh,
00:53:34.940 Southwestern Ontario.
00:53:36.820 And then,
00:53:37.500 so I'm doing that weekend of shows coming back to Austin,
00:53:40.000 hanging out,
00:53:41.380 going to do a bunch of shows,
00:53:43.220 hopefully mothership and a sunset and three,
00:53:47.100 three theater shows in Toronto.
00:53:49.580 Yucks,
00:53:50.120 Oshawa theater shows are all sold out.
00:53:53.020 If you're in Ottawa or Oshawa,
00:53:55.280 I need you to go buy tickets facts.
00:53:58.620 Um,
00:53:59.100 we've sold over like 500 tickets in Ottawa,
00:54:02.660 but the venue seats like 700.
00:54:05.880 So I want to sell that out.
00:54:06.960 So please go help me out.
00:54:08.200 If you're in the Ottawa region area,
00:54:10.440 it's all new material.
00:54:11.600 If you saw me the last time in the basement of Biagio's at the yuck yucks,
00:54:16.620 this is going to,
00:54:17.340 this is big time.
00:54:18.560 This is the first floor of Biagio's.
00:54:20.780 This is,
00:54:21.620 yeah,
00:54:22.020 this is the upstairs Bronson center.
00:54:25.740 Come out and,
00:54:27.540 uh,
00:54:30.120 bless you.
00:54:32.600 Oh, 1.00
00:54:33.200 fuck. 1.00
00:54:36.460 Ottawa Bronson center. 1.00
00:54:38.160 Oshawa's almost sold out at yuck yucks.
00:54:41.460 Uh,
00:54:43.100 what is that?
00:54:44.220 I think the dog's scratching the floor upstairs.
00:54:46.900 Probably.
00:54:47.540 Um,
00:54:48.240 Windsor,
00:54:48.860 Ontario,
00:54:49.340 go get tickets.
00:54:50.120 Sarnia,
00:54:50.580 Ontario,
00:54:50.960 go get tickets.
00:54:51.820 Kingston,
00:54:52.360 Ontario,
00:54:52.840 go get tickets.
00:54:55.040 Thunder Bay,
00:54:55.920 Ontario,
00:54:56.420 go get tickets.
00:54:57.120 Collingwood,
00:54:57.860 Ontario,
00:54:59.320 Owen sound,
00:55:00.060 Ontario,
00:55:00.640 go get tickets.
00:55:01.980 What are you playing in Owen sound?
00:55:03.680 I have no idea.
00:55:04.600 I don't even, 0.99
00:55:04.980 I did a gig in Owen sound for a fucking golf course with Mike Bullard. 0.97
00:55:08.040 And it was one of the first gigs I did when I first got signed to yucks. 0.98
00:55:11.700 Yeah,
00:55:12.020 it's going to be,
00:55:13.240 Oh,
00:55:14.200 speaking of yucks,
00:55:15.000 here's the lineup for this week.
00:55:17.920 So,
00:55:18.320 uh,
00:55:18.760 let me just see what else I got.
00:55:20.860 Collingwood,
00:55:22.780 Windsor,
00:55:23.440 Sarnia,
00:55:24.200 Winnipeg,
00:55:24.840 Manitoba.
00:55:25.380 We still have tickets available for that.
00:55:27.680 Then Victoria,
00:55:28.960 BC,
00:55:29.780 Calgary,
00:55:30.260 Alberta,
00:55:30.680 and Vancouver.
00:55:33.200 We're trying to sell all these out guys.
00:55:35.300 So please go and support me.
00:55:36.940 Then I'm going to be back in the USA,
00:55:39.640 San Jose,
00:55:40.380 big California tour coming up at the end of October and into November,
00:55:46.180 October 22nd,
00:55:47.360 San Jose improv.
00:55:48.840 Then I'm in Oxnard,
00:55:50.800 California,
00:55:51.860 Hollywood,
00:55:52.440 California,
00:55:53.520 Ontario,
00:55:54.160 California,
00:55:54.720 Irvine,
00:55:55.600 California.
00:55:56.560 Then I go to Tulsa,
00:55:58.260 Oklahoma,
00:55:59.660 Denver,
00:56:00.080 Colorado,
00:56:01.040 Fort Worth,
00:56:01.880 Fort Worth,
00:56:02.680 Texas,
00:56:04.100 Houston,
00:56:04.560 Texas,
00:56:05.160 Charlotte,
00:56:05.500 North Carolina,
00:56:06.420 Atlanta,
00:56:06.860 Georgia,
00:56:07.180 and then finishing out the year back in Canada.
00:56:10.160 It looks like,
00:56:11.360 uh,
00:56:12.040 Montreal.
00:56:13.140 There's two shows,
00:56:14.600 22nd and 23rd.
00:56:16.320 That's what's November.
00:56:18.160 Niagara Falls,
00:56:19.300 uh,
00:56:19.580 Niagara Falls,
00:56:20.580 Canada.
00:56:21.180 We were so successful there.
00:56:22.300 We're doing four shows in December.
00:56:24.280 Let's go,
00:56:25.180 go get tickets for that.
00:56:26.240 And then,
00:56:26.900 um,
00:56:27.760 and that's going to be a lot of new material,
00:56:30.660 a lot of crowd work,
00:56:31.560 a lot of fun,
00:56:32.560 fun stuff going on there.
00:56:33.760 I'm going to be doing the same act.
00:56:35.760 And then back to Edmonton,
00:56:37.420 um, 0.99
00:56:38.160 at the fuck river, 1.00
00:56:39.360 river Creek casino. 1.00
00:56:40.860 It's like a,
00:56:41.520 it seats like 3000,
00:56:42.980 2000 people.
00:56:44.580 So get tickets because that's going to be tough.
00:56:50.140 Luckily they are paying me a,
00:56:51.840 you're getting a,
00:56:52.760 yeah,
00:56:52.920 yeah,
00:56:53.060 yeah.
00:56:53.220 They're paying me.
00:56:54.040 It doesn't matter if I sell it out or not, 0.99
00:56:55.900 but it would be nice to perform for more than 400 people in a fucking 2000 seater. 0.98
00:57:00.240 But I mean, 0.99
00:57:00.440 it would be really funny if it,
00:57:02.540 yeah,
00:57:02.860 it's probably going to be like half full.
00:57:04.740 I mean,
00:57:05.400 I mean,
00:57:05.740 it's still a thousand.
00:57:06.840 That'd be pretty sick.
00:57:07.560 That's huge.
00:57:08.260 Yeah.
00:57:08.780 So it'll,
00:57:09.380 it'll still feel really full.
00:57:10.660 Most you've ever performed for.
00:57:11.620 No.
00:57:11.940 Yeah.
00:57:12.820 The Ottawa is going to be the most at 700 and then I was going to be 650 in,
00:57:17.540 in Calgary.
00:57:18.860 We're almost sold out there in Calgary.
00:57:21.060 I forgot to mention Calgary somewhere in there.
00:57:24.620 Um,
00:57:25.320 but thank you guys for listening. 0.98
00:57:26.600 You guys are sick.
00:57:27.880 I think we got some great clips. 0.96
00:57:29.660 Please share.
00:57:30.680 This whole podcast is free.
00:57:31.840 We're going to do another one,
00:57:32.960 uh,
00:57:33.880 where we do 10 minutes for free and then the rest is on Patreon.
00:57:36.600 This is all free.
00:57:38.100 If you are thinking about Patreon,
00:57:40.340 watch the first 10 minutes of this and then watch the rest and go, 0.99
00:57:44.340 Oh shit, 0.99
00:57:44.940 I could, 1.00
00:57:45.300 that's all the stuff that I would have missed if I hadn't paid.
00:57:49.160 So support me on Patreon.
00:57:50.960 It's the best way to support me.
00:57:52.100 Five bucks a month.
00:57:53.740 Uh,
00:57:54.220 it's four bucks us,
00:57:55.400 six bucks Canadian,
00:57:56.460 whatever.
00:57:57.140 Appreciate you guys.
00:57:58.120 Go follow Armin,
00:57:59.500 our Bobby a R M I N a R B O B Z or Z on Instagram. 1.00
00:58:06.280 Armin,
00:58:06.520 our bobs.
00:58:07.500 Thank you guys.
00:58:09.020 That's a wrap.
00:58:09.740 Good night.
00:58:10.040 All right.
00:58:10.640 I'm good.
00:58:11.180 Thank you.
00:58:11.420 I'm good.
00:58:12.160 I'm good.
00:58:12.840 Thank you.
00:58:13.300 I'm good.
00:58:13.400 You're welcome.