Swift Hit the Fan ｜ The Bankas Show - #043
Episode Stats
Words per minute
158.53056
Harmful content
Misogyny
66
sentences flagged
Toxicity
188
sentences flagged
Hate speech
94
sentences flagged
Summary
On this episode of The BANKS Show, I talk about the biggest month of my career in my entire 12 years of comedy, the first time I ever did a standup set, and how I accidentally got stoned on weed.
Transcript
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hello and welcome to the bankers show everybody it's your boy ben bankus we are back like and
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subscribe to this video if you're listening on spotify make sure you're following subscribing
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doing all that fun stuff crazy ass uh week in the world crazy week for me um it's been a crazy month
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january has been uh the biggest month for my career in my entire 12 years of doing comedy
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what's really cool about it being january is i started comedy in january my first ever stand-up
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comedy set was january 7th 20 2011 so actually is that 13 years so i've been doing comedy or 12 or
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13 years since january 2011 is when i stepped foot on the first open mic stage wasn't the first time
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i've been on stage by the way because i as a kid i played violin and i did acting in high school but
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it was the first time i did a stand-up set and my mom was there and um my friends came
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and it was super epic and i remember i always think about the first time i did stand-up too because
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now when i do stand-up sometimes before the show i'm pacing around having a cigarette
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outside thinking about what i'm gonna say and i did the same thing on the first night that i ever did
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stand-up so that's special and 13 years later january 2024 i gained 70 000 followers in one month
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i went from 80 something thousand followers to 149 000 right now we're sitting at 149 about to be at 150
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which is another celebration which i have to chill with the celebrating because there's too many good
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things happening you're gonna be uh physically fit i don't want to get injured i did injure my neck a
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little bit celebrating recently celebrating that ricky gervais um actually dm me back after
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i accused him of stealing my bit he dm me within 15 minutes so he definitely stole it
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and uh that's pretty obvious i talk a bunch about this on the patreon latest patreon episode patreon.com
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slash ben bank if you want to support me there but anyway i was in the car and i just was like yeah
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and i just tweaked my neck and i was on the way to the gym and i still worked out i did i did pull-ups
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my assisted pull-ups because i'm still obese um not morbidly i don't think i don't think i'm morbid
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i think i'm just a bit regular obese og obese and i tweaked something and then i had to go to
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windsor and it was a whole thing anyway i talked about it on the patreon i don't want to get into that
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but everything else has been super super positive and a lot of i felt very inspired um
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humbled by just how many people love my stuff right now and uh excited for all the people that
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hate my shit too you guys are you guys are gonna hate it that's okay keep hating it keep loving it
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i'm gonna keep sharing it i do want to say this though welcome to all of my new fans all the new
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people who just showed up in the last month you know this is a really uh cool experience i'm glad to
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have you aboard but you need to show some respect to the og fans the ones that got me to you because
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it was the og fans that shared the shit out of my videos that helped it catch and and and snowball
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and get as many views as it did so shout out my og fans welcome to the new fans this is the bank is
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show this is how we do it inspiring your pussy asses to do something with your life
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cat williams jewish half jewish cat williams morbidly obese cat williams
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um but this sweater is special to me this is a two-year-old sweater it's actually kind of wrinkled
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um so that was a mistake we shouldn't have worn it but i wore this sweater on kill tony
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wow that was a special night man that was a special night episode 535 so let's just watch
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that for a second and if you're listening you can just listen yeah we're gonna get to that
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oh we're gonna get to that ben bankus is next on kill tony let's see what happens here
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there's a little pop from the comedian section there that's usually a good sign
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here he is everybody put your hands together one more time for ben bankus
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yo what up i'm from canada too but i'm not retarded
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yeah we got uh legal weed in canada which is it seems good but it's weird because we have like
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warnings on the label of weed like i had this weed that said may cause schizophrenia i was like this
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some good dude this is some schizophrenia cush right here and i had this other weed that said pregnant
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mothers who use cannabis may contain thc in their breast milk i was like i want to suck on this
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sounds incredible delivery is so different back then it's crazy to watch just how much more
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you guys ever get high and watch youtube you ever so high watching youtube you accidentally watch a
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probably should just open with that joke looking back
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um i don't want to watch the whole thing because um we might even have to cut this part out because
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um i've actually never smoked weed in my life once i've never done drugs and i've only ever smoked a cigarette
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but that was a legendary experience that uh allegedly happened and uh
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uh tony was nice about it we could hear what he had to say here
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that's fantastic work fantastic work i literally thought i was the only one that did that
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i guess everybody does that that's wild yeah pretty wise observation it's always a sign of a really good
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joke is when it's something like that how long you been on stand-up 10 years 10 years
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fuck yeah i get it i could i could sense that absolute control of the room acknowledge the
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fucking uh incident from earlier what part of canada are you from i'm from toronto canada
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absolutely toronto big booming it's the only place really in canada very fun yeah absolutely
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my little brother vancouver's cool too right pardon me vancouver's cool
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it's kind of gay yeah yeah it's it's charming in some ways but winnipeg you can admit you've been
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to winnipeg right fuck no you've never you've never even been there that's crazy that i hadn't
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even been to winnipeg at that point in my career wow that's wild it's like a more expensive flight
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from toronto to winnipeg than to come here yeah fuck that and there's nothing there right except
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jared's family that is just a nice family that is true i love jared he's my good friend you guys are
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friends yeah all right awesome yeah man that's great absolutely this is fucking embarrassing bro
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i don't know how they didn't rip me more i feel like they were so nice to me i was so nervous up
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there too like i was just like because i was trying to kill it it's weird because for two years i thought
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i did really well on this and now i'm watching you ben uh comedy right now i uh i kind of escaped
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the country i got a patreon my girlfriend has a job i don't know she's paying for shit right now
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that's great what did she do she uh she she uh is like the host of a financial news show on she
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like interviews billionaires wow casually in the living room while i fucking jerk off with the door
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closed damn look at that absolutely incredible it's crazy how much confidence i had though like to just
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say shit like that like fuck and that actually pissed my girl off like for a while
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he was just mad about that was like what what's so bad about that that i jerk off with the door
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closed man it's crazy it's crazy to come um we've we've come a long way definitely after watching
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that which is embarrassing i don't even want to watch the rest of it but he doesn't actually say
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anything mean to me i don't think what a life what do you like to do for fun uh i don't know i
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look and we've been uh since i've been here i've been making sketches we did a sketch with jared and
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i did a sketch where i'm such a businessman dude i just like can't even i love that that that's why
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like fox news loves it too because i just it's like i'm gonna that that's what politicians do here's
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a question well i already have an answer i know what i'm gonna answer i'm saying what i gotta say
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okay i feel nervous all over again watching this bro i feel nervous for myself back in the in the
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past um but i was watching um the latest kill tony and they had this guy on that's like from austin
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that has like he's like a gay guy that i did a roast battle once against him and uh he has like the
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worst teeth ever and he like he's gay and his breath smells bad and he's just like so gross
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he's like poor i'm pretty sure he had to do a go fund me at one point for like to pay for his
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apartment one month like just some really dark shit but anyway he got pulled like he was like
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the first comic i think pulled or second comic on the new stadium kill tony they're just like doing
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the show in stadiums now what's up everybody it's me ben bankus sorry to interrupt this program but i
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want you guys to help me out support me the best way to support me and get bonus content every week
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is by going to patreon.com slash ben bankus and signing up it's six dollars canadian a month four
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dollars us a month go sign up we are competing against other comedians some of these guys are
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making hundreds of thousands of dollars a month on this shit uh we can beat that okay so patreon.com
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slash ben bankus you know what it is go sign up super bowl is coming up which is exciting and it's
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always around uh the time of year that's my birthday my birthday is uh february 4th so uh put that in
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your calendar and i think super is that super bowl sunday on february 4th or is it february 4th not sunday
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what is it it's uh thursday so february 7th will be the super bowl pretty pretty much that's what
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what it's like every year oh february 11th is the super bowl
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the fuck sunday february oh this is january
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oh yeah february 4th is a sunday oh it's oh so it's the following week okay
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and i'm gonna be turning 32 and i'm feeling good about it honestly a lot of people i think i'm in a
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better position than a lot of people on their 32nd birthday that um you know i can at least say that my
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january was strong so when i came into my 32nd birthday it was it was a good feeling
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and this is go time really because i feel like there's a window like once you're in your 40s if
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you weren't already famous in your 30s or popular like you know nobody's being like who's your favorite
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comic oh this 45 year old fat guy named ben bankus who well that's also not true because when i was in
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university my favorite comic was louis ck and he was very popular among people i knew like very
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popular and he was in his 40s at the time and we were in our teens we were like 18 so
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never give up on your dreams honestly because you could one of my favorite comedians of all time
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rodney dangerfield he quit comedy at 28 i think he did it from like when he was like 19 or 20
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until he was 28 and then he went full-time aluminum siding uh sales which is what i well
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i didn't sell aluminum side i sold photocopiers for a while uh with rico and then i did uh commercial
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real estate but office leasing but uh he sold aluminum siding even after he got famous again so
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he just kept writing jokes for 12 years 13 years and didn't perform and then when he was 41 or 40 he
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went back on stage started going back on stage and he got it he got opportunities he went on i think
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whatever it was merv griffin or one of those shows and blew up because being on one of those shows now
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was what viral is today having a video get six and a half million views i mean that's probably less
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views than rodney dangerfield would have got on his first appearance on whatever it was let me find out
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what it was ed sullivan that's who it was yeah 1967 march 1967 he went on ed sullivan and it wasn't until
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the 80s i think that he was on fucking carson dude because that's what happened he he accused
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carson of having some guy in the audience at one of his shows steal one of his jokes and give it to
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carson and they had beef and then at one point somebody came in to a comedy club and saw rodney
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dangerfield perform and was like johnny would love you and he and he didn't want to tell that guy
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about he just thought okay maybe maybe he's over it right and so he's like you you got johnny you're
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gonna do johnny all this stuff he's super excited and then they called him like two days later like
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actually no johnny's still mad about the fact that you accused him of stealing that joke
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and then he just kind of i forget what it was he sent a letter or or he saw him at a restaurant he
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saw johnny carson at a restaurant and he just went up to him and he was like yo man like my bad like
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seriously i want to do your show and he was already doing well so johnny sat down with him they had
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drinks and that's how the story goes and then they he went on johnny carson and after that he became like
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a regular on johnny carson um but each one of those episodes of johnny carson was probably like
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what 20 million people nine million viewers nightly so
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that's on average that's still pretty high but that's what it is like my one of my best videos
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right now are like what six seven million views so that's probably how many people would have seen
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your stand-up if you went on johnny carson any given night it's interesting looking at history
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backwards through the lens of we have social media now because you realize that everything was really
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just building towards social media like all tv all comedy everything the way it worked was
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substituting for the fact that they didn't have social media and it makes more sense or it makes sense
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that people like colbert and all these other late night hosts don't get that many views because of
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how much shit is out there to watch right like if they were the only thing you could watch then yeah
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they would be getting the views which in some ways i think america kind of envies canada having our
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because that kind of makes sure that that's all that's on tv especially because most people who watch
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tv now are just old it's not like most young people don't watch tv at all don't have cable
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like if you meet somebody with cable that's that's odd unless they own a home like own a full-on house
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they just have cable like that's kind of a it's almost a red flag to be honest if somebody owns cable
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that they have like mild dementia or something but i guess cable is important if you want to watch
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sports thank you for listening to the bank of show this show is sponsored by my patreon account that's
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how we pay for this show patreon.com slash ben bank is support us now you get a bonus podcast every
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week as long as you continue to pay uh four to six bucks a month depending if you're in canada or the
00:18:46.560
us go sign up right now patreon.com slash my bank is or you can go to my website benbank is.com and click
00:18:53.680
the patreon button this year's super bowl is going to be taylor swift versus san francisco
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taylor swift um has taken over football somehow by becoming this cheerleader girlfriend
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of what's his name travis kelsey super embarrassing for him like i don't know how he deals with that
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he must get bullied on the on the team about that be like yo taylor like there's like i would be
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chirping somebody i knew that was dating taylor swift straight up especially if i worked with them are you
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kidding me but i think what's going to happen is the kansas city what are they called now chiefs they're
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still called the chiefs it's still allowed that is interesting that she's dating a guy on the only
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the last racist named team right kansas city chiefs but kansas city is going to win because they beat
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buffalo which was basically a rigged game that's what people are saying there was it was a rigged game
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and they beat buffalo because taylor swift has money money on this shit she's got marketing money
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if taylor swift's boyfriend wins a super bowl that's good for her music tour that's good for her music
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career you see what i'm saying like who's the halftime show do we know who the halftime show is yet has she
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been the halftime show before hopefully not hopefully she will be i mean maybe that's what she wants out of
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this i don't know what she wants but she is manipulating everything like all the magazines
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are talking about taylor swift she's not that attractive can we get that sorted out here she's
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not that attractive she has almost no shape to her she is a straight stick figure woman she is basically a
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plain jane facial like facially she looks a little mousy not
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she's you don't look at her and go oh my god she's gorgeous you look at her and go yeah i'd
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fuck her that's pretty much what it is and that's what travis kelsey said he goes i'd fuck her and now
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he's gonna win the super bowl because he fucked her which is good for travis kelsey honestly
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that's boss like it's gonna suck when he when she breaks his heart and she like just bangs one of the
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black players because we all know that's coming we all know the day's coming when oh taylor swift blows
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some black guy in the locker room after the super bowl win travis kelsey found crying into the uh
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into the whatever they have the american stanley cup you're telling me that travis kelsey is a
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spokesperson for pfizer and she could sway the election because one-fifth of her audience
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will vote how she wants them to vote i mean if this was the other way around and it was you know
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like joe rogan was at the like or there was a female presence at these games that was going the
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other direction it was pro-trump everybody would be saying how horrible it is this is awful she
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promotes horrible things but because it's taylor swift and her fans are majority of her fans are
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just clinically insane women that have no life no husband no kids they make their profile picture
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into taylor swift they think they're taylor swift they're mentally deranged people they're very
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similar to ariana grande fans um and any other fan of of uh these artists where uh terror attacks
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happen at their shows no but there is a cult like fan fanaticism with taylor swift but it's only from
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people that you'd never want to hang out with nobody who's a taylor swift fan are you like oh that
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person's cool right i mean it's a lot of her fans are kids right and like basically adult kids people
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who never grew up people who just just a lot of sad women women that aren't helping society there's very
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few taylor swift fans that are good for society i'll tell you that right now very few you know taylor
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swift oh she can sway the election how about taylor how about you tell one-fifth of your fans instead
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of telling them who to vote for you tell them to kill themselves do you do that
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i think one-fifth of taylor swift's fans should um should should drink the the uh the fruit punch
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it could get to that though we could get to the point where if they start pushing euthanasia people
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like taylor swift would be like look you guys maybe like if imagine she came out and was like
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a lot of my fans are mentally ill and might need to commit like be put down those fans would do it
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they'd be like she's right i'm fucking out of my mind i think i'm taylor swift i'm not i live in a
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bachelor apartment that my parents pay for because i have uh schizophrenia and i'm a woman
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and nobody wants to take care of me nobody can stand me
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yeah i think she should tell one-fifth of her fans that it's time to go
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look taylor swift has a bad haircut can we agree on like that hairstyle of i have the bangs
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any girl with bangs it's like okay what what is this you're woke you work at a bookstore the
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coffee shop at the books taylor swift looks like she works at the starbucks at the chapters
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right she doesn't she looks like she works at a barnes and noble she's not that interesting there's
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nothing she doesn't talk about anything interesting i've never there's never been a line from her
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she doesn't really motivate anybody in my opinion like maybe does she does she say you can do it
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anything you want i don't i think she just goes on there and goes i'm taylor swift here's my shitty
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song about how many times i broke up with this these guys and and and that's it and it's
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none of this music i wrote i didn't do anything maybe she did write that's some people oh she's an
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amazing lyricist oh give me a break let me let me pull up who writes for taylor swift taylor swift
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has written and is credited as a songwriter on all of her songs she's also collaborated and co-written
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with many other songwriters so are you saying that she doesn't have any ghostwriters is that
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is that facts does taylor swift have ghostwriters no she works hard and writes directly from her
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heart i love how her fans is like they would never her fans are so dumb that even if taylor
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swift went out there i didn't write any of this they'd be like oh stop she's being modest like
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mentally deranged people that this she doesn't have to tell her fans whether to vote for trump
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or biden because even if she told them to vote for trump they wouldn't that whole one-fifth of
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her fans would vote for trump that's bullshit it's one-fifth of her fans are mentally deranged and will
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always vote democrat liberal no matter what um
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some of the songs i bet you didn't know were written by taylor swift
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this uh to add a nick yes taylor's definitely writes or at the very least is co-author on all of
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her songs she doesn't i don't know maybe i'm wrong but let's just see taylor swift
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this is the big story about taylor swift right now explicit fake images of taylor swift
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prove laws haven't kept pace with tech experts say first of all this is absolute
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bullshit in my opinion that we're not going to regulate ai because the government's using it to
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data mine and data harvest everything that we do we're not banning it because all of the fortune 500
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companies are using it to data mine and data harvest and and find out everything about us and
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uh calculate what we're going to buy next and all this kind of stuff we're not doing it to the
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advertisers who use it we're not doing it because uh the military is using ai to create
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drones and shit that blow people up without human pushing a button that's all fine but taylor swift
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has ai images of her doing some sort of explicit thing and now we need to regulate the
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internet fuck you taylor swift shut up i haven't even seen the images and i want to but um she
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actually looks kind of hot in this video they know how to make her look hotter than she is though
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that's i have to say that isn't she like 50
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how long has she been famous though for like 15 years right explicit ai generated photos of one
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of the world's most famous artists spread rapidly across social media this week highlighting
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once again what experts describe as an urgent need to crack down on technology and platforms that
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make it possible for harmful images to be shared fake photos of taylor swift that depicted the songwriter
00:28:54.640
in sexually suggestive positions so she wasn't even naked this is the really crazy part about this
00:29:01.840
folks she wasn't even naked first of all i remember what jessica out when we used to we're kids and we
0.99
00:29:08.480
jerk off to porn they had jessica alba always it would be her on a body her head on a picture and
1.00
00:29:15.200
shit like that there was no we need to shut down the internet and she was this was actually naked pictures
1.00
00:29:22.240
and what about all the all the artists the the actresses that had their naked images actually shared
0.98
00:29:30.160
on the internet and leaked like jessica uh jennifer lawrence jennifer remember when jennifer lawrence's
0.98
00:29:37.600
photos were leaked and it was like literally her like finger banging herself and her tits out and
1.00
00:29:41.920
they were real photos they were actually real photos that people shared on the internet
0.84
00:29:45.280
they're not even like this isn't even that bad can you see it yeah this isn't that bad this one's
00:30:06.640
kind of they're kind of hot she looks hotter in ai by the way totally they're flattering this is what
0.97
00:30:13.280
this is why taylor swift wants to ban ai okay and regulate it because taylor swift is hotter with ai
00:30:25.600
most people are uglier with ai you see look at a picture of me with ai you look at a picture of
0.84
00:30:31.520
anybody with a the ai version ugly but ai makes taylor swift sexy i don't know what it is but the
0.86
00:30:38.640
computer fixes all those boring parts about her where she's just like i'm taylor swift now she's
1.00
00:30:45.280
like yes taylor you need to learn from the fucking internet and from the ai and start acting a little
0.99
00:30:52.480
sexier otherwise i hope your football team loses okay i want to see her get hit at 25 kilometers an hour
1.00
00:31:02.160
whatever those black guys run at just see taylor swift get decked on the side of the i don't want
1.00
00:31:10.560
i don't want to i'm not saying that we should that should happen but if it did and on tv and i was
0.93
00:31:15.840
watching it i might have a little chuckle to myself but it'd be a big deal that would be viral by the way
00:31:22.000
taylor that's a good idea if you want to um do something viral accidentally fall down the stairs or
0.95
00:31:27.680
something at the at the fucking super bowl right that would be fall down the step here's my prediction
0.95
00:31:34.880
she's gonna fall on the super she's gonna fall down something's gonna happen there's gonna be
0.95
00:31:40.080
some sort of oh my god is taylor okay and then that's how they're gonna rig the game deflate gate
00:31:45.280
all that stuff if i can quote quote taylor swift x marks the spot where we fall apart said
00:31:52.960
kirsten thomason an assistant professor at university of british columbia
1.00
00:31:58.080
fuck you kirsten thomason whoever the fuck you are some shitty professor at a shitty university
1.00
00:32:06.000
nobody cares what you think it's it's unbelievable that you are paid to teach kids
1.00
00:32:16.320
where we ought to be focusing more attention in the law is also now on the designers that create
00:32:26.240
the tools that make this so easy and on the websites that make it possible to have these this
00:32:31.840
image go up and then be seen by millions of people said thomason
00:32:36.400
so basically there's a technology that exists that makes you able to fake celebrities images
00:32:46.400
their voices and that should be illegal i even saw jordan peterson post something it was like an ai uh
00:32:57.200
thing of aoc or somebody and he was saying this should be illegal because you can trick people into
0.52
00:33:03.280
thinking that this is true if you watch an ai aoc and think it's real you're retarded like i'm sorry
0.95
00:33:10.400
like sorry jordan i love your work and i love everything uh you know you do and um your daughter's
0.86
00:33:15.520
very cool and and you've got a great family but if you can to make it illegal to make a shitty video
00:33:23.360
like i get in 10 years maybe it's like it'll be indistinguishable i don't think so you'll always
00:33:27.760
be able to know some guy made it in a basement let's be honest after the pornographic photos
00:33:35.520
depicting swift began to appear the artist fans swapped the platform with protect taylor swift
00:33:41.440
posts an effort to bury the images and make them harder to find through search what this is the level
00:33:49.920
of insanity we have where people are more willing to put their name and life on the line for taylor swift
00:34:00.320
than for their own countries or for their own communities or their own kids most of these women
1.00
00:34:07.840
tweeting this shit have probably had fucking four abortions let's be honest um protect taylor swift
1.00
00:34:14.960
i'm a fucking maniac i'm a fucking hole i'm a cat whore you know those those fat women that stink
1.00
00:34:22.720
like cats and then they and then they're quote that um taylor ben bankus says taylor swift fans are fat
1.00
00:34:37.760
stinky cat women but they're protecting her from these images that aren't even from what my
1.00
00:34:46.160
understanding they're not even naked photos they're just sexy photos of her in front of the kansas city
0.98
00:34:52.320
chiefs and all this stuff they're not naked what are they protecting against from people maybe liking
0.97
00:34:59.200
her a bit more like her fat her fans are like the fat woman at the club that doesn't let you hit on
1.00
00:35:08.960
their friend that's what they're doing because all these images come out and guys are like bro
0.99
00:35:13.840
did you see this video taylor swift's fake but it's fucking she looks hot and now her fans like hey you
1.00
00:35:19.680
cannot look at taylor that way she is a she's mine and she's my friend she's coming home with me to
0.99
00:35:27.440
no share a couple sexy fucking photos taylor in a post x says its teams were closely monitoring
0.99
00:35:35.680
the site to see whether photos would continue to appear our teams are actively removing all
0.98
00:35:39.840
identified images and taking appropriate action against the accounts responsible for posting them
00:35:47.040
i have to be honest that's insane that x is is like a free speech website but then taylor swift
00:35:53.360
complains and you know if she can if taylor swift can get x to delete every fake ai photo of her
1.00
00:36:03.040
then taylor swift can rig the nfl to make the kansas city chiefs win the super bowl
00:36:11.040
am i wrong she's got power she's got money u.s white house spokesperson you know i'm talking
0.98
00:36:19.280
about the black lady with the that looks like a muppet has muppet hair
0.98
00:36:26.960
kareen jean pierre said social media companies have an important role to play in preventing the
00:36:33.280
spread of misinformation and non-consensual intimate imagery i did not consent to have a
00:36:40.000
artist an ai artist render so does that mean i can't paint a picture of taylor swift what if i
00:36:46.240
wanted to paint a picture of taylor swift where her she's going like this and her little tiny
0.97
00:36:50.960
non-existent titties are uh fucking being pushed together while she looks like a character from
0.98
00:36:57.600
madagascar is that illegal for me to draw a picture of taylor swift is that adult image like it's this is
0.99
00:37:05.680
it's getting to the point this is very alarming so we're going to do what we can do to deal with this
00:37:13.280
issue yeah it's alarming to to john pierre this the the white house press secretary that taylor swift
00:37:19.840
images of not even of her nude that's alarming folks it's not alarming that iran just is backing all you
00:37:29.840
know using u.s money that trump cut off by the way and then biden re re gave to iran and they're
00:37:36.800
using that to create the whole hamas thing and that and the whole hootie thing and it caused all
0.78
00:37:41.360
these problems all that it's like oh we got that under control but you know what's alarming that taylor
00:37:46.640
swift uh there's a fake photo of her going like this in front of a couple football players and she's
0.99
00:37:51.120
fully clothed fuck off this is ridiculousness as the ai industry continues to grow companies looking to
0.97
00:37:58.960
share in the profits of design tools giving users with little experience the ability to create
0.99
00:38:03.840
images and videos using simple instructions the tools have been popular and beneficial in some
00:38:08.960
sectors but it also makes unnervingly it makes it unnervingly easy to create what are known as deep
00:38:15.520
fakes ooh deep fakes there's nothing worse than a shitty obviously fake photo of like it's
00:38:24.480
the deep fake detecting group reality defender said it tracked a deluge of
0.89
00:38:28.400
non-consensual pornographic material depicting swift particularly on x some images also made
00:38:49.600
after this week's targeting of swift u.s politicians called for new laws to criminalize the creation of
0.96
00:38:54.480
deep fake images are you understanding how fucked up that is i mean it's the same idea as in
0.91
00:39:05.200
in ireland where they're doing no more memes or no more mean memes or offensive memes or memes against
0.97
00:39:12.720
the government and oh because we don't want to ruin that's how we protect we're protecting democracy
00:39:19.120
it's a lie this is a lie that's a lie how can you protect democracy by making it illegal to do stuff
00:39:31.360
some canadian laws that deal with the broader issue of non-consensual distribution of intimate
00:39:35.040
images but most of those laws don't explicitly refer to deep fakes because they weren't an issue so oh
00:39:40.320
there you go if you want to do deep fakes come to canada we don't have a law against again
0.87
00:39:44.720
judges dealing with deep fakes have to decide how to apply old laws to new tech
00:39:52.160
is should we should what do we do about all those jackie chan movies where there's a
00:39:56.880
a dub over chinese dub over is that a deep fake
00:40:02.800
that's basically what i did though with with my olivia chow videos they're like some people can
00:40:06.400
be like that's a deep fake and make it illegal but it's like the one good thing about making deep
00:40:12.320
fakes illegal is then only i can do them and then i can just use my own voice and it's an actual video
00:40:17.680
so it's not a real deep fake have to prove that in court now oh sir it was not a real deep fake i
00:40:29.920
here's a video let's change the subject for a moment what's up everybody it's your boy ben bankus i am
00:40:38.240
going on tour as always i will be in waterloo ontario february 1st there are a few tickets
00:40:46.960
left available february 2nd and 3rd in waterloo are sold out february 21st in toronto the early
00:40:53.120
show is sold out tickets available for the late show february 22nd sold out in burlington we added
00:40:59.360
a second show on february 25th we couldn't do this show on the same night february 22nd because there's
00:41:05.520
a band playing or some bullshit so february 25th there's tickets available in burlington after that
00:41:13.200
i'm going to be in edmonton alberta march 27th the comic strip in the west edmonton mall go get
00:41:19.520
tickets for that then april 8th in halifax nova scotia uh go get tickets for that in april 9 10 11 12 i
00:41:30.240
believe i'm doing the lol fest in new brunswick and nova scotia a couple small towns all that
00:41:35.200
information is on my website ben bankus.com go there right now if you're in the u.s dates are
00:41:40.480
coming soon i can tease right now that it's going to be it's looking like may for some of those first
00:41:46.880
dates and we're going to release them as soon as possibly february february or um pardon me february
00:41:53.440
or march so if you want to be first to hear about the u.s dates go and sign up for my email list on my
00:42:01.360
website or sign up for patreon of course patrons will always get first dibs on all ticket links
00:42:07.440
and all merch drops that happen so patreon.com slash ben bankus but that's the other crazy thing
00:42:13.280
with this whole trump scandal where they're giving this woman 83 million dollars because he said
00:42:19.680
something that offended her or he he claimed to not have raped her when it was proven that he didn't
00:42:25.760
rape her and so then because they couldn't win that case they just did a defamation lawsuit it's like
0.74
00:42:31.200
defamation she who is this woman nobody's ever fucking heard of her if anything he did he he he
0.97
00:42:36.720
should be getting 83 million dollars from her for creating some publicity around her name who the
1.00
00:42:42.720
fuck is johnny carol nobody fucking knows just some old woman with dementia that they slapped
1.00
00:42:49.200
makeup on she's basically a female biden and they bring her in and she's all oh i'm so happy oh
1.00
00:42:56.080
she doesn't even know what she's talking about and they give giving her 83 million dollars to some
0.99
00:43:00.800
old bag who who are her kids that are about to be rich as shit if they weren't already i'm assuming
1.00
00:43:05.760
she was already rich if she's getting a lawsuit at that such a high number she doesn't have kids
1.00
00:43:12.960
she lives with a bunch of cats in the middle of the woods she now has 83 million dollars most of
1.00
00:43:18.080
it's probably going to go to the uh to biden or or toward you know she's going to donate to the
00:43:22.560
campaign against trump and we have to get all these women who hate trump it's like why don't
1.00
00:43:28.640
you just say it how it is women who don't like to suck dick i'm so like and oh all those women at
1.00
00:43:35.440
those uh you know pro-abortion rallies no we are i'm a horn for who who's fucking you some loser gay
1.00
00:43:42.880
guy who's in the closet some dylan mulvaney looking motherfucker is is is is the one who's getting
1.00
00:43:49.200
one who's getting his dick sucked by you that you're such a whore had to have five abortions
1.00
00:43:53.440
who's impregnating you who i i honestly think half these women going i've had five abortions
1.00
00:43:59.200
they're just so mentally ill that they're like i want to have an they want to the only reason
0.88
00:44:03.360
these women on the left want an abortion is they just want somebody to get them pregnant
1.00
00:44:08.240
i want an abortion is i want to get pregnant and then destroy it and then keep you know just have a
1.00
00:44:13.200
bad life i don't know that's to me that's what that is a lot of the problems in our society seem
00:44:18.400
to be coming from the fact that all these young women who have abortions they don't have kids
0.59
00:44:23.360
when they could have kids and then what did you go on to do ladies did you go on to be a ceo did you
1.00
00:44:28.560
go on to be you know a leader in your field no you got an abortion because you didn't want to have
0.99
00:44:34.720
a kid and now you're 35 and you're going fuck i want a kid you're you killed it the kid was 10 would
1.00
00:44:46.800
every year after the abortion is another year older your kid would have been so if you're
00:44:50.720
if you had an abortion 10 years ago you would have had a 10 year old just think about that it's
0.98
00:44:55.280
fucked up um not saying it should be illegal not saying it shouldn't be illegal but definitely saying
0.99
00:45:03.600
that this whole feminized fascism that's taking place that was a
0.99
00:45:11.600
term coined by tucker carlson recently i heard it when he came to canada talking about christia
00:45:19.200
freeland who in canada is she's feminized fascism it's this idea that you can't ask any questions
00:45:26.320
but it's not because i not because we're going to kill you or because you know we have guards we'll
0.75
00:45:31.200
send guards to your house it's because it's just not nice it's not nice to ask questions it's we
00:45:38.000
don't like we don't want to be rude that's women don't ask me that question in a rude way i don't like
1.00
00:45:43.600
when you're rude well too bad our countries are founded on fucking rude people who weren't afraid to
0.98
00:45:50.800
say it how it is and and and put their foot down and say this is bullshit the western world was not
1.00
00:45:57.600
founded by john e carols bunch of fucking dumb cat ladies who didn't suck enough dick in their life
1.00
00:46:06.640
didn't have kids didn't have purpose didn't do anything for the greater good of society at all
1.00
00:46:14.880
other than be a whiny old rich woman that apparently got what did she say in a department store that she
1.00
00:46:22.640
got raped and then they found out it wasn't true bro you know how that's how you know women are crazy
1.00
00:46:29.680
as fuck when you know like how people throw out rape allegations like you know like women will just
1.00
00:46:35.600
fuck you and not like you and like throw out a rape allegation this woman's in her 80s doing that
1.00
00:46:39.840
she's that's how bored being in your 80s is is like maybe i was raped like give me a
1.00
00:46:47.040
fucking break dude i don't know i don't know what's i that's the other thing that does bug me too is that
0.99
00:46:52.640
not enough people are willing to go i don't know i'm confused like i'm confused by this shit i obviously
0.98
00:46:58.400
have my opinion but at the end of the day i'm confused i don't know you know uh
0.87
00:47:12.640
i don't want to come off as too hardcore also i want to i want to get into the states i want to get
0.98
00:47:17.920
this tour going i don't want to fucking oh i said something crazy at my fucking can't toronto house
0.99
00:47:23.680
so look johnny carroll she's she's fake and it's it's all part of this left this push from the left
0.99
00:47:39.760
that makes anybody who isn't on the left or isn't pledging allegiance to the left and saying i am with
00:47:47.760
you guys i'm against trump i'm against pierre poliev i'm against i want him if you're not pro
00:47:54.320
immigration mass immigration all this stuff you're being told by the mainstream media that you're a bad
00:47:59.680
person that your thinking is wrong that you just aren't understanding and you're not willing to move
00:48:07.040
at the pace of change that society's moving at that's what i hate about all these politicians
00:48:11.440
especially these young like aocs i want to be we need to be the voice of change but they never say
0.99
00:48:18.160
change to what change to what to shit they're changing everything to shit and i talk about
0.97
00:48:25.200
this in my act so i don't want to get too into it but seriously stop changing things that don't need
0.99
00:48:33.840
to be changed and they've convinced people of color right non-whites they've convinced non-whites
0.81
00:48:41.280
that if if anybody says i don't want to change anymore i want to stay the same or i want to go
00:48:50.080
back they've convinced all those people that means back to racism that means back to slavery but not
0.99
00:48:55.120
that far back you fucking idiot like 1985 to 2000 how about that far back how about from like how about
0.99
00:49:03.520
just the length of michael jordan's career can we just go like from whenever michael jordan started
0.99
00:49:09.120
basketball to when he finished that was the best era for everybody nobody people weren't really
00:49:15.920
racist against michael jordan people were like basketball yay black people whoo rap tupac biggie
00:49:22.400
whoa all these great black actors denzel this that eddie murphy uh will smith what are we talking about
0.99
00:49:31.200
are we trying to pretend that the 90s were slavery like fuck off that's what people want to go back to
0.99
00:49:36.560
they don't want to go back oh you want to go back that means you want to go back to the kkk and
1.00
00:49:41.440
the slate no we don't want to go back to that we want to go back to fucking michael jordan playing with
0.95
00:49:46.720
kobe at the tail end of the career or playing against right that's all i'm saying is stop that's how i
0.85
00:49:57.120
pissed off a guy i talked about this on my patreon pod but my latest show in windsor ontario one of
00:50:06.000
the guys who was the host of the show is a half black kind of kid and at the second show he got
0.75
00:50:12.480
all mad and and upset and because i was making a joke about exactly what i just said and it's like
0.93
00:50:19.760
he's like oh yeah going back over back back in time when i'm a slave no back in time to when you
00:50:25.520
would actually maybe had a career comedy is what i said to him and i kind of roast him a bit but it's
00:50:31.280
true 30 years ago 25 years ago 20 years ago if you're a black canadian doing stand-up comedy you
00:50:39.440
had a good you made a very good living compared to now so i don't want to hear any bullshit oh we're
00:50:45.680
going back because it means we're going back to racism no means we're going back to civilized
00:50:50.640
being civilized even the idea that you can't smoke anywhere and and i think you should be allowed to
00:50:55.520
smoke inside that's the one thing i agree with andrew tate on that smoking inside is a benefit to
00:51:04.400
society actually for all these and why why can't we smoke inside all these who wef guys they want to
00:51:11.840
reduce the population anyway so if smoking inside is so bad for us why can't we do it
00:51:19.760
why can't we do it if we want to die right want to make you go you got to smoke outside and then
0.99
00:51:26.720
you come inside and then you get in the suicide pod and then we kill you but you can't smoke inside
1.00
00:51:32.560
like shut the fuck up let me smoke in here if people on mass just said fuck it we're all gonna
1.00
00:51:40.240
smoke inside and shit nobody could stop us that's that's the power of the people that we don't flex
1.00
00:51:46.480
i think that would i think that should be a new form of um protest it's just smoking indoors
0.99
00:51:55.200
on mass every single person inside a place we're all smoking fuck off what are you gonna do about it
0.95
00:52:01.600
sue all of us or give us all a bylaw infraction no smoke indoors as a protest to everybody who's
0.99
00:52:12.080
being a loser these days because there's a lot of fucking losers out there a lot more than ever
0.99
00:52:17.440
more than ever it's crazy you you know during the pandemic a lot of the people on the left you didn't
1.00
00:52:25.280
see them because they didn't leave their houses because they were so covered covered covered now they're
00:52:30.080
everywhere and you see them go to any like ramen if you're if you're in toronto go to a ramen place
00:52:35.120
there's all these single men single women they're white they're they look boring they look like they
1.00
00:52:41.600
like taylor swift they uh and they have they have some job some office job they make 60 to 90 grand a
00:52:49.280
year canadian and they so take home between 45 and 70 grand and they just have no life and and they
0.94
00:52:59.680
just are they're just boring losers that are brainwashed they're gonna vote for trudeau every
0.99
00:53:04.960
single time they don't give a fuck um and that's who this country this country is filled with and that's
1.00
00:53:15.760
now we can't post this episode because i'm worried that it's can't leave the country if i post it so
00:53:29.040
i also heard that jagmeet and trudeau want to change the voting laws in canada so that you can do mail-in
00:53:33.520
ballots and there's going to be a three-day voting instead of one day voting and all these other rules no no
00:53:39.360
ids needed which is if they're doing that and it's so obvious that they want to stay in power
00:53:45.360
because they're openly saying how badly they want to stay in power by it doesn't matter how many
00:53:50.640
scandals happened oh you know for christia freeland if they the the judicial system in canada found out
1.00
00:54:00.320
that it was not lawful for the government to use the emergencies act for the trucker convoy and now
00:54:07.280
christia freeland's oh we're gonna appeal it but i'm watching that going you guys should all resign
00:54:14.160
immediately that means that you were wrong about that and you've been wrong about everything since
00:54:18.400
then so you should resign but they won't resign and now they're changing the laws of how to vote all of
00:54:25.120
a sudden after they did all these things that they were proven to have fucked everybody over with
0.82
00:54:31.520
i mean it's it's so obvious it's so in your face and people are afraid to say anything about it
0.98
00:54:41.280
i'm afraid to say something about it but i am and it's bullshit people are more willing to stand up
0.60
00:54:50.160
for taylor swift we need to get rid of all the ai images of taylor swift but they will not stand up for
0.93
00:54:57.760
free speech in their country they will not stand up and say yeah the the the whole reaction that the
00:55:05.040
government had to the freedom convoy was insane literally crushing a movement called a freedom
00:55:12.160
convoy and then claiming they're doing that in the name of freedom in the name of democracy we're
00:55:17.760
getting rid of the freedom fighting people but but hamas is a freedom those guys those are freedom
00:55:23.760
fighters according to christian freedom christian freedom and trudeau is up there and and and those
00:55:31.920
are the oh well we call them fighters or we don't oh they're kind of terrorists but it's really
00:55:38.960
complicated it's kind of a freedom fighting situation oh it's a freedom cutting off somebody's
1.00
00:55:43.280
fucking head and fucking a dead body which these hamas sick fucks did is freedom fighting but standing
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and bringing your family and in front of the parliament hill and and freezing cold temperatures
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and and getting hot tubs set up and playing hockey and doing speeches and and chanting that's that's
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terrorism fuck you you're an idiot anybody who thinks that's an idiot and that's the scary part because
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the idiots will never ever have their mind changed it's it's very very unlikely that people who
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love trudeau or or hate the freedom convoy or hate rebel news they're never going to change their
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mind the only there's only a small window that people have to change their minds on political
00:56:31.040
stuff and it's from age like 18 to 30 and if you're not that by then i don't know i think you're just
00:56:37.920
that's how you are for your whole life and that's another thing people don't realize before we get out
00:56:42.240
here i want to say this motivational moment you don't have that much time in our lives people go
00:56:48.400
oh i got 80 years yeah 80 first of all the last 20 years suck right the first 20 years you have no
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control over what you do first 25 years you're basically in school or working or whatever so you
00:57:01.600
really have from 20 till 60 to figure it out so you have what is that 30 years 40 years you have 40 years
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max max that's that's assuming everything goes well and you're healthy to actually figure out and take
00:57:16.880
your life to the next level and achieve your goals and the government knows this but the government
00:57:23.280
wants to pretend like oh just slow down everybody just relax and let's just let's go universal basic
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income and don't worry about yourself don't worry about your own career don't worry about your dreams we
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need to help the immigrants we need to we need to it's a collective cause right remember covid we all
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need to work towards one collect no fuck that capitalism is number one i'm going to be the
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biggest comedian in the world this is going to be the biggest podcast in the world if you don't believe
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that unsubscribe unfollow me go fuck yourself go vote vote for joe biden go eat johnny carroll's
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