Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - GOML LIVE #88 - HELLO CALLER

00:00:52.000 That's enough.

00:00:54.000 That's enough of that hardcore cacophony.

00:00:59.000 That was The Meat Men from Where the Meat Men You Suck, and that song was, I'm Glad I'm Not a Girl, I'm Glad I'm Not a Girl.

00:01:07.000 Sung by That was Tesco V singing there.

00:01:11.000 That's him right up there.

00:01:13.000 Oh, shit.

00:01:14.000 That's Tesco V. I knocked over the animal.

00:01:20.000 We did a off the record with this.

00:01:24.000 We did.

00:01:25.000 I chose that album because, and I'm sure this is prevalent in my description of Where the Meat Men You Suck, but it was just a time, a different time.

00:01:36.000 A time when you could be rude.

00:01:38.000 Gangrene, the hardcore band, would have their whole cover would just be Budweisers.

00:01:44.000 And you could be politically incorrect.

00:01:47.000 It wasn't right-wing or left-wing.

00:01:49.000 Sure, most people were lefties.

00:01:50.000 You know, you listen to Clash lyrics and they sound like a bunch of fucking Shagivera socialists, but that doesn't mean that the other side wasn't permitted.

00:01:58.000 Now it's not permitted.

00:02:00.000 If you have a band and the drummer, like say the singer of Trapped or Michael Graves, if they express an opinion that is not totally radical, left, communist, anarchist, which I can't believe those two words are considered the same thing now, you're done.

00:02:15.000 That band is over.

00:02:18.000 BBQT is over because they use the word savage in a song.

00:02:23.000 What?

00:02:24.000 You may notice I'm wearing a fun sweatshirt that I bought in honor of Detective George Kakavale.

00:02:36.000 I don't want to disparage him by getting the name wrong.

00:02:38.000 Maybe Casavale, but Casavale?

00:02:41.000 This was a guy who was shot a long-ass time ago.

00:02:44.000 I think it was in the 80s.

00:02:45.000 He was a detective who was shot dead.

00:02:47.000 And then they had a canine unit named after him.

00:02:50.000 So his daughter thought, well, that's cool.

00:02:52.000 I'm going to make sweatshirts for this canine unit because it honors my dad.

00:02:58.000 And so she did.

00:03:00.000 They take a long time to get made now.

00:03:03.000 I'll explain that in a second.

00:03:05.000 And they flew off the shelves because this woman wore it to a new Rochelle high, a Bronx high, Yonkers high, somewhere like that.

00:03:15.000 And the teacher said, no, you can't wear that here.

00:03:17.000 And she goes, why?

00:03:18.000 Because of this?

00:03:19.000 Because of this?

00:03:20.000 No, because of this.

00:03:22.000 The blue line, that flag, it makes black people feel unsafe. 1.00

00:03:29.000 So teachers and students are not allowed to wear this sweatshirt.

00:03:32.000 So it promptly sold 8 million copies.

00:03:35.000 Wow.

00:03:36.000 I'm exaggerating, but it sold probably 5,000.

00:03:41.000 Did very well.

00:03:42.000 Still well?

00:03:42.000 Because everyone's just buying it.

00:03:44.000 My problem with it is I don't like sweatshirts where you can't unzip them.

00:03:47.000 You know what?

00:03:48.000 It's got to be fucking cold out to wear this.

00:03:50.000 You're right, but that looks way better than a zip up.

00:03:52.000 What is on your head?

00:03:53.000 That looks better than a zip-up.

00:03:55.000 Did my mom knit that? 0.84

00:03:57.000 Somebody's mom did.

00:03:58.000 I got it off Etsy.

00:03:59.000 But this is the perfect color for me.

00:04:02.000 I have a brand, Nopey Up, that you might not know, but I use both of these colors.

00:04:08.000 And so when I saw this hat, I said, you know, I sought it out, actually.

00:04:13.000 And it fits perfectly.

00:04:15.000 It's the perfect green for me.

00:04:20.000 Are you disgusted?

00:04:21.000 Disgusted is a compliment.

00:04:24.000 I wish I was disgusted.

00:04:27.000 That should be your goal.

00:04:28.000 I was actually able to make it to disgusted.

00:04:30.000 You know, I just knew there was no way that that would be good.

00:04:35.000 I'm confused.

00:04:35.000 I'm just trying to dig in.

00:04:36.000 It's such a shitty hat, too.

00:04:38.000 It's so obviously a handmade.

00:04:40.000 It looks like the shitty hats my mom sends me in the mail.

00:04:43.000 No offense, mom, but those suck. 0.99

00:04:46.000 I like it.

00:04:47.000 Clearly.

00:04:48.000 Look at it.

00:04:48.000 Like, look at the stitching.

00:04:50.000 It's just so cheap and homemade and stupid.

00:04:53.000 I like it.

00:04:54.000 I like that you could expand.

00:04:55.000 You put it around, you know, you stretch it and it stays.

00:04:58.000 It's actually better quality material than.

00:05:00.000 I'm wearing one of the coolest sweatshirts in the world, literally in the world.

00:05:05.000 And you're wearing one of the gayest things in the world. 1.00

00:05:07.000 Well, see, that's the problem.

00:05:08.000 I didn't know that you would be wearing such high caps.

00:05:12.000 We have a new sponsor, Tactical Walls.

00:05:14.000 I'd like to welcome our new sponsor, Tactical Walls, to the Censored.tv family.

00:05:18.000 Tactical Walls is a veteran-owned and operated.

00:05:20.000 And Tactical Walls is designed to store and secure firearms.

00:05:23.000 But really, you can hide anything in there.

00:05:25.000 Guns, grandma's prescriptions, heels and sunglasses, whips and chains.

00:05:28.000 Hide it all with Tactical Walls.

00:05:30.000 Right now, our loyal Censored.tv subscribers get 15% off all orders at Tactical Walls.

00:05:36.000 Just use promo code Gavin15.

00:05:40.000 Support veteran-owned businesses who support us.

00:05:43.000 TacticalWalls.com, promo code Gavin15.

00:05:46.000 Thanks, Tactical Walls.

00:05:47.000 We like you more than a friend.

00:05:47.000 Now remember, Tactical Walls are the guys behind this.

00:05:53.000 The trophy of me and Ryan.

00:05:56.000 I don't know why Ryan gets to be a war movie veteran.

00:05:59.000 I'm a war movie veteran.

00:06:01.000 You haven't seen enough war movies to become on literally the same pedestal as I am.

00:06:08.000 Well, I've seen Saving Private Ryan, and my name is in the title.

00:06:11.000 Yeah, I saw Saving Private Ryan stoned.

00:06:13.000 I saw Purple Heart for that.

00:06:14.000 Oh, I was stoned when I saw it too.

00:06:16.000 I was stoned every day of my life until about a couple years ago.

00:06:19.000 Oh, really?

00:06:19.000 On what?

00:06:20.000 Marijuana?

00:06:21.000 Yeah, I was smoking a lot.

00:06:21.000 Marijuana?

00:06:22.000 I was smoking a weed.

00:06:24.000 I definitely saw it high, and it was.

00:06:26.000 So Tactical Walls has tactical walls, like you're seeing here, Where you can make a mount for your guns.

00:06:32.000 You can also have, they have like baseball mounts and stuff where you have all the baseball bats and your helmets and shit.

00:06:38.000 But then they also do these cool shells and shit.

00:06:40.000 And I'd like to show you one that they made particularly for the show, specifically for the show.

00:06:46.000 You ready for this?

00:06:47.000 Y'all ready for this?

00:06:50.000 Did you know that you're not fair?

00:06:52.000 I knew it.

00:06:52.000 Did you know in the song, Y'all Ready for This, that's the only lyric?

00:06:57.000 Y'all ready for this?

00:06:58.000 Dan, dan, dan, dan, dan, dan.

00:07:00.000 That's it.

00:07:00.000 Huh.

00:07:02.000 The only lyrics to Y'all Ready for This are, Y'all Ready for This.

00:07:10.000 Nope, that's not true.

00:07:12.000 There's yeah.

00:07:28.000 It doesn't open.

00:07:30.000 Hey, kids, want to get dad's guns?

00:07:33.000 You can't get to dad's guns.

00:07:35.000 It won't open.

00:07:36.000 Hey, thief, you want to get dad's guns?

00:07:38.000 You can't, it won't open.

00:07:47.000 Oh-ish.

00:07:48.000 They can't hear you.

00:07:51.000 They can't hear me?

00:07:52.000 No.

00:07:57.000 Now, it won't close.

00:07:59.000 You move it over here.

00:08:00.000 You can hear the latch.

00:08:02.000 You hear that magnetic latch?

00:08:04.000 I move it over here.

00:08:08.000 Pretty fucking cool, huh?

00:08:18.000 Let's just do that one more time.

00:08:24.000 Shotglass is there.

00:08:25.000 Mini-makers there.

00:08:27.000 Move it away.

00:08:28.000 Close it up.

00:08:31.000 Pretty dope.

00:08:35.000 Kingsman level, cool.

00:08:37.000 He's the guy who invented the phrase, thank you for my service.

00:08:41.000 That's great.

00:08:41.000 That's great rules.

00:08:43.000 Tactical Walls.

00:08:44.000 Promo code dude.

00:08:45.000 TacticalWalls.com, promo code Gavin15.

00:08:48.000 We welcome our newest sponsor.

00:08:50.000 We have a fun idea for a show today.

00:08:55.000 What?

00:09:01.000 The particle board mounts will give you sawdust residue.

00:09:04.000 I'm not going to lie.

00:09:05.000 Some of the boards will give you dust.

00:09:07.000 Sometimes the complaints will be false.

00:09:09.000 Dusty.

00:09:11.000 Like it goes false.

00:09:15.000 The reason that show was such a hit is because he was really enjoying himself.

00:09:19.000 You could tell.

00:09:20.000 The bloopers are better than the show.

00:09:21.000 He was having a great time.

00:09:23.000 Oh, fuck.

00:09:24.000 I haven't been working out because of these cracked ribs.

00:09:27.000 I feel like I live with Pontius Pilate and he's in a bad mood every time I want to fucking move.

00:09:34.000 So we have a fun idea for today's show.

00:09:37.000 We're just going to wing it.

00:09:38.000 And I don't mean wing it in that we'll just go through our topics.

00:09:43.000 I'm saving my topics for tomorrow.

00:09:45.000 We've got a lot to talk about with Dr. Zeus being canceled and obviously Mr. Potato Head and all of this bizarre world we're living in.

00:09:56.000 We have tons of footage of my pet Biden being an absolute adorable little clown.

00:10:02.000 But I'd rather just sort of try to plow through calls for a change.

00:10:06.000 I got to get back home early.

00:10:07.000 So if people are annoying, I might just end this show incredibly early.

00:10:11.000 And if they're scintillating, we might go more than two hours.

00:10:16.000 But people always complain they can't get through on the call days.

00:10:19.000 And the freeloaders who listen to this show never hear calls because we do calls after.

00:10:25.000 So let's give them a taste at calls.

00:10:27.000 That's cool.

00:10:29.000 Let's have a call up.

00:10:31.000 And we're going to shut people down way quicker than before.

00:10:37.000 So when I say thank you for calling, throw them to the wolves.

00:10:41.000 In fact, you should probably play the interstitial.

00:10:44.000 Thank you for calling.

00:10:45.000 Ah, here we go.

00:10:50.000 You are on the air.

00:10:53.000 This is a fucking loser.

00:10:55.000 You want me to learn, share, listen, understand why.

00:10:59.000 Hey, why does everyone get two things?

00:11:00.000 You have one thing.

00:11:02.000 Thank you for calling.

00:11:03.000 It's great hearing from you.

00:11:05.000 All right, next call.

00:11:07.000 By the way, I've quit hard liquor for Lent, and I'm starting just now to get a buzz from beer.

00:11:15.000 Nice.

00:11:16.000 I don't know what, when I say just now, I don't mean the second.

00:11:18.000 I mean like this far into the Lent.

00:11:21.000 Your tolerance is going down.

00:11:22.000 My tolerance is finally down where I can pass out from drinking beer.

00:11:27.000 But it's still just like at the end of the night, you feel like that blueberry chick from Willy Wonka.

00:11:34.000 And then you go to bed and you just wake up every two hours and piss like a racehorse.

00:11:38.000 But you're never slurring or anything.

00:11:40.000 I could have driven a jumbo jet last night and I had probably seven beers.

00:11:45.000 Why don't you show your Donald Trump?

00:11:49.000 Okay.

00:11:50.000 So I told Ryan to get this impression app so he could be as funny as Kyle Dunnegan.

00:11:55.000 The problem is they don't have a lot of people.

00:11:59.000 They have all these new people.

00:12:01.000 Right?

00:12:01.000 That's true.

00:12:02.000 So the selection is either super hack people like Christopher Walken or like Tyler Laudry, some kid that's TikTok famous or something.

00:12:10.000 And then you got President Trump on there and some others.

00:12:13.000 But you know, the good thing about what Dunnegan does is I can replicate that.

00:12:16.000 I just thought he doesn't use the Impressions app.

00:12:18.000 He uses Snapchat.

00:12:21.000 Oh.

00:12:21.000 So I could do that on Snapchat.

00:12:23.000 So with Snapchat, you find the face and then you put it in.

00:12:26.000 Yeah.

00:12:27.000 So it could be my face.

00:12:28.000 Yep.

00:12:28.000 Have you seen these Tom Cruise deep fakes?

00:12:31.000 Yeah, they're creepy.

00:12:32.000 Dude, you could have a sex tape of you fucking a kid and just go, that's not me. 0.99

00:12:38.000 Yeah.

00:12:38.000 This is going to be a boon for active pedophiles or any kind of sex tape.

00:12:44.000 Like they go, you're cheating.

00:12:45.000 Oh, yeah, show me video proof.

00:12:47.000 And then they show you and you go, that's not me.

00:12:49.000 Show the Tom Cruise deep fakes because they are effing amazing.

00:12:54.000 I mean, right down to the wrinkles on his forehead.

00:12:57.000 That's what I don't get.

00:12:59.000 I saw an AOC deep fake where she was blowing a dude, and she says, in a perfect AOC voice, Don't you better not come in my mouth. 1.00

00:13:06.000 And it is perfect.

00:13:09.000 But if you concentrate really hard, you can kind of see a different tone of skin here.

00:13:15.000 You need to like squint your face off, and you may be able to notice it.

00:13:22.000 But this is even better than that.

00:13:26.000 This is disturbing.

00:13:28.000 Oh, is this someone writing about it?

00:13:30.000 God damn it.

00:13:31.000 Why can we never have the thing?

00:13:33.000 There we go.

00:13:47.000 You guys cool if I play some sports?

00:13:48.000 This one.

00:13:51.000 Look, hats and stuff?

00:13:52.000 Yeah, and waving the hand in front of the face. 0.68

00:13:54.000 And my hand in front of the face, and then the darkness of a hat.

00:13:59.000 Which is the one.

00:14:00.000 No, there's a new one that's the best one.

00:14:02.000 The newest one I've seen was the magic one.

00:14:05.000 You got newer than that?

00:14:07.000 Yeah, I think it's...

00:14:08.000 Yeah, he's on the golf course.

00:14:10.000 No, that's older than that.

00:14:12.000 Oh, that's the text of shitty.

00:14:16.000 No, the magic trick's better than the golf.

00:14:21.000 Like that, and you did declare something.

00:14:22.000 Jesus Christ.

00:14:23.000 They couldn't show the clip, could they?

00:14:25.000 I got it.

00:14:26.000 No, we've seen that.

00:14:27.000 We just saw the magic clip, shit for brains.

00:14:29.000 And we saw the golf clip.

00:14:30.000 Why are you going backwards in time?

00:14:32.000 Well, what's that top one?

00:14:35.000 That's why.

00:14:36.000 Oh.

00:14:41.000 It's a little embarrassing.

00:14:42.000 You know, it reminds me.

00:14:43.000 I was once in Russia.

00:14:46.000 I ran into Gorbachev.

00:14:49.000 He said, Mr. Movie Star, are you nervous?

00:14:54.000 I said, no, Mr. Gorbachev.

00:14:57.000 Nervous.

00:14:59.000 He goes, well, remember how much a polar bear weighs?

00:15:05.000 Polar bear?

00:15:06.000 He said, enough to break the ice.

00:15:12.000 It's the last time I've ever seen.

00:15:14.000 We're in the future.

00:15:15.000 We are in the fucking future.

00:15:19.000 This is the blade runner shit.

00:15:21.000 Like, they could use that to...

00:15:23.000 You could kidnap someone and say that your kids are fine while they're dead.

00:15:31.000 You could do anything.

00:15:32.000 You could have someone...

00:15:33.000 You could have Trump faking the election, meeting with Putin.

00:15:37.000 Yes, thank you for helping me fuck the election.

00:15:40.000 Here, show us your Trump.

00:15:43.000 It's really, really good.

00:15:45.000 I think this is the good one.

00:15:47.000 Nope, this one.

00:15:49.000 For too long, the liberal media has been censoring and silencing great writers such as Ernest Hemingway, Ernest Borgnine, and Ernest Ghost to Kemp.

00:15:59.000 And did you see what they're doing to Dr. Seuss?

00:16:02.000 I mean, I don't like him, but it's unfair.

00:16:06.000 Very unfair what they're doing.

00:16:09.000 Maybe that wasn't the...

00:16:10.000 That wasn't the one.

00:16:10.000 You're always wrong.

00:16:12.000 Without exception.

00:16:13.000 Don't show the others.

00:16:13.000 They're just...

00:16:15.000 Why did you upload all three?

00:16:17.000 Because I couldn't tell which one was which.

00:16:20.000 See, when it, yeah.

00:16:22.000 You delete the shitty ones.

00:16:24.000 You absolute retard. 1.00

00:16:25.000 That's how you do things in life.

00:16:27.000 Well, I do.

00:16:27.000 I want to keep them all because there's one thing in two of them that are really good.

00:16:30.000 One of them, he goes, and I don't like him.

00:16:33.000 It's green.

00:16:34.000 Great him.

00:16:35.000 I kept that for that little nugget.

00:16:37.000 And then the other one, there's something else that I did that I want to put them in one video.

00:16:41.000 He couldn't have gone like blah, blah, blah, good in the write-up.

00:16:44.000 There's no write-up.

00:16:45.000 Oh, yeah.

00:16:46.000 In the actual description of the thing.

00:16:48.000 Dot move, whatever it is.

00:16:49.000 Yeah, I know what you mean.

00:16:51.000 I can't look at that hat.

00:16:53.000 How much did it cost you?

00:16:55.000 I think it was $10.

00:16:57.000 And the woman, it's probably spent like a year knitting that. 1.00

00:17:01.000 It's like Puka hats.

00:17:03.000 Oh, my God.

00:17:06.000 I have to relive the punch every time I sneeze.

00:17:09.000 You don't need Advil, do you?

00:17:11.000 No.

00:17:12.000 It's still going, still going.

00:17:13.000 I don't take medicine unless it's fun medicine.

00:17:16.000 Then it's pretty cool.

00:17:18.000 Minroll, Johnny Apple CBD.

00:17:20.000 Thank you guys for being here since day one.

00:17:22.000 We hope Tactical Walls stays as long as Johnny Apple CBD.

00:17:26.000 This episode is brought to you by our proud sponsor, Johnny Apple CBD.

00:17:29.000 My brother called me the other day.

00:17:30.000 He said, I overdid it on the leg day.

00:17:33.000 It's weird.

00:17:34.000 When you have an upper body working out, I don't know.

00:17:37.000 I could lift 100 houses and be slightly tender the next day.

00:17:42.000 But any kind of squats or we do this thing in the gym where you hit the guy's gloves, bok, bok, bok, bok.

00:17:47.000 And then you squat down and you squat, you go up.

00:17:49.000 So you're going up and down like this.

00:17:51.000 Maybe two rounds.

00:17:52.000 That's only six minutes in total with a break.

00:17:56.000 The next day, you're walking down the stairs like the ground is lava and someone's putting broken glass up your ass.

00:18:03.000 Like you go, you become a nustrad fata alikan, a kawali singer, just going up and down stairs.

00:18:17.000 I don't, why is that?

00:18:18.000 Legs are more sensitive than arms, I guess.

00:18:20.000 Anyway, he had a bad leg day.

00:18:21.000 He put CBD on his legs, the topical, Johnny Apple CBD, from these commercials.

00:18:26.000 That's how he heard of it.

00:18:28.000 And he goes, it fucking worked.

00:18:30.000 Miracle drug.

00:18:32.000 So you can ignore the tincture and the gummies and the cookies and all of that stuff.

00:18:38.000 Try the topical when you have sore muscles.

00:18:42.000 Just try that one thing and you will freak out.

00:18:45.000 They've been with us since day one.

00:18:47.000 Go to jacbd.com or you can go to johnnyapple.com right now and show them the same support you show us.

00:18:56.000 Even if it's a small purchase, get the cream, get the topical, try it on your sore muscles, treat yourself.

00:19:03.000 Promo code Gavin.

00:19:04.000 Now, to be clear, for tacticalwalls.com, it's promo code Gavin15.

00:19:11.000 But for JohnnyApple, jacbd.com, it's just the word Gavin, the name Gavin.

00:19:17.000 20% off all orders.

00:19:19.000 Thank you, Johnny Apple CBD, for sticking with us through COVID.

00:19:22.000 God bless Johnny Apple CBD.

00:19:24.000 And of course, God bless America.

00:19:28.000 I just got real sniffly.

00:19:33.000 What are you doing?

00:19:34.000 Nusrat Fato Talidan.

00:19:37.000 Nusrat Fata Ali Khan, buddy. 0.74

00:19:40.000 You're getting the name wrong.

00:19:42.000 And if you're going to play Kawali singers, then maybe not get the musical part.

00:19:52.000 What's his hit?

00:19:54.000 Oh, Nusrat.

00:19:55.000 He's dead now for being a fatso. 1.00

00:19:59.000 He had a little bit too much jabbuti.

00:20:07.000 Come on, you lazy prick.

00:20:09.000 Get up.

00:20:21.000 Is Indian like Chinese in the sense that the way you pronounce it matters?

00:20:28.000 Like you can't go TikTok as well.

00:20:30.000 I don't think so.

00:20:31.000 I don't know.

00:20:32.000 Every time I try to Mandarin and maybe Aboriginal Taiwanese are the only things where there's Bob, there's Bob, there's Bob, and there's Bob. 0.80

00:20:44.000 And they all mean either I'd like to get some money for the train or I fucked your mother.

00:20:50.000 Hot shit! 0.99

00:20:52.000 So you got to be careful.

00:20:54.000 Yeah, I try to steal your...

00:20:55.000 In other words, it's a stupid language.

00:20:57.000 Jamaican, Scottish.

00:20:59.000 I don't care if you're speaking English. 0.99

00:21:01.000 I can understand you.

00:21:03.000 Chinese?

00:21:05.000 Dude, in China, they have subtitles on their shows in Chinese.

00:21:11.000 So you're watching Chinese, you are Chinese, and there's Chinese subtitles.

00:21:16.000 You know why?

00:21:16.000 Because their language is so fucking hard that 62-year-olds who were born there are still trying to get the edge off, still trying to master it.

00:21:26.000 They haven't quite nailed it yet.

00:21:28.000 Are you sure Jamaican?

00:21:30.000 Because I hear a lot of Jamaicans and it's like, what?

00:21:35.000 You know what I mean?

00:21:41.000 See what I mean?

00:21:42.000 See what I'm saying?

00:21:43.000 Yeah.

00:21:44.000 Well, obviously, like, there's degrees, but generally, if you listen to Jamaican news, you know, local cable access, you're going to follow it.

00:21:54.000 But when we got that guy, Guan Shat, two loaf of bread and one milk in a... 0.98

00:22:01.000 Can I comment on one of the things you said earlier where you were allowed to be edgy and stuff?

00:22:05.000 I watched Rush Limbaugh on Donahue, and just, it's fascinating just because, you know, I was never really familiar with Rush.

00:22:12.000 I just knew he ruled.

00:22:13.000 I never really got around to hearing him, but this was amazing, you know, and the crowd...

00:22:18.000 Borat was there.

00:22:20.000 I have a question about my wife.

00:22:23.000 They're all ugly, huh?

00:22:24.000 Anyway, so half the crowd clapped when they were shitting on him, like calls were shitting on him.

00:22:29.000 Half of them clapped when he made good points.

00:22:31.000 And they were all...

00:22:32.000 There was no ferocity.

00:22:33.000 It wasn't like Jerry Springer, where they're like, boo, fuck you.

00:22:36.000 Canceled forever.

00:22:38.000 Yeah, it was so refreshing.

00:22:39.000 Do you see what Dr. Zeus is canceled for?

00:22:41.000 He had drawings of like, I said I wasn't going to cover the news, but like a Chinese man eats with sticks. 1.00

00:22:48.000 And it had this stereotypical 1800s Chinese guy, which was like 100 years off, I guess, in the 1950s, whenever he made that.

00:22:56.000 And the guy's running in old traditional Chinese gear, and he's using chopsticks, eating from a bull. 0.81

00:23:01.000 Yeah.

00:23:02.000 They did.

00:23:03.000 They do.

00:23:04.000 They still use chopsticks.

00:23:06.000 And then he had some Arab guy on a camel. 0.98

00:23:09.000 Okay.

00:23:11.000 But it's so funny with a lot of these racist caricatures.

00:23:15.000 That's what they look like.

00:23:17.000 Yeah.

00:23:18.000 Like, I'm sorry.

00:23:19.000 What about any Disney movie, Mulan or throwing the blacks there? 1.00

00:23:26.000 The blacks? 0.99

00:23:27.000 Yeah.

00:23:27.000 To your left, Ryan?

00:23:29.000 The blacks. 0.98

00:23:30.000 The blacks. 0.98

00:23:31.000 Oh, that's supposed to be blacks. 1.00

00:23:33.000 What did you think they were?

00:23:34.000 I thought those were monkeys.

00:23:37.000 Okay.

00:23:38.000 So blacks do not look like that. 0.99

00:23:41.000 That is a hyperbolic exaggeration.

00:23:45.000 But, you know, some super-duper black people sometimes resemble some of that. 1.00

00:23:53.000 It's a cartoon.

00:23:55.000 It's a joke.

00:23:56.000 It's a joke.

00:23:58.000 You know, there was some gender stuff in there, too, like, mommy is a he. 1.00

00:24:01.000 Oh, no, mommy is a she. 1.00

00:24:02.000 You can be a mommy, ba-ba-ba.

00:24:05.000 You know what I noticed about older pictures of him?

00:24:07.000 His nose is fucked up.

00:24:08.000 But you can't look that up because he's got so many little rhymes about a nose that if you look up Dr. Zeus' nose, you get lost in a bunch of nose shit.

00:24:16.000 I want to find out what happened to him.

00:24:17.000 Mulberry Street.

00:24:19.000 Bunch of fake Puerto Rican wise guys in rent-controlled houses living above cheap, shitty, touristy Italian restaurants. 0.52

00:24:32.000 That's Mulberry Street.

00:24:33.000 Charlie Kirk pointed out that Obama was like Obama's all over.

00:24:37.000 Anything you want to learn, you can learn it from Dr. Zeus.

00:24:42.000 Now I'm saying Zeus.

00:24:44.000 Because you said Zeus.

00:24:46.000 What do you call him?

00:24:47.000 Dr. Zeus?

00:24:48.000 Dr. Zeus.

00:24:49.000 Oh, I say Zeus.

00:24:50.000 I understand that.

00:24:51.000 Does everyone else say Zeus?

00:24:53.000 I believe.

00:24:54.000 I've never heard Dr. Zeus, but you know, the way you say us is us.

00:24:58.000 I don't want to make you self-conscious, but you say us.

00:25:01.000 Yeah, that's Canadian.

00:25:02.000 Okay.

00:25:02.000 I'm damn proud of that.

00:25:03.000 I'm not changing it.

00:25:04.000 I'm not asking you to.

00:25:06.000 Let's take some fucking calls.

00:25:07.000 Yeah.

00:25:09.000 Hopefully from Canada, eh? 1.00

00:25:10.000 Fucking fucking.

00:25:12.000 Some guy smoking a dart fucking got a 2-4 there of most in Canadian estate.

00:25:18.000 John.

00:25:19.000 What's up, John?

00:25:23.000 Uh-oh.

00:25:24.000 John wandered from the phone, it appears.

00:25:26.000 John Juan.

00:25:27.000 John, are you there?

00:25:30.000 1-1,000.

00:25:31.000 Oh, shit, he hung up.

00:25:32.000 Thank you for calling.

00:25:33.000 Damn, John.

00:25:35.000 Who's next?

00:25:36.000 Train.

00:25:37.000 What's up, Train?

00:25:42.000 I think people assume we're not going to take calls till 10.

00:25:45.000 Is this on me?

00:25:47.000 Hello?

00:25:48.000 Hello?

00:25:48.000 Oh, he's listening to the show.

00:25:50.000 I just heard him say, what's up, John?

00:25:52.000 Correct.

00:25:52.000 Check, check.

00:25:53.000 John, you man?

00:25:56.000 I'm switching.

00:25:56.000 Okay, wait.

00:25:58.000 Check, check.

00:25:59.000 Check, check, check.

00:26:01.000 Is this you fucking up now?

00:26:03.000 Well, I switched it to this.

00:26:06.000 the other one's supposed to work.

00:26:08.000 Oh, this is embarrassing.

00:26:09.000 Does this work?

00:26:11.000 I can hear you.

00:26:11.000 Can you hear me?

00:26:14.000 Hello?

00:26:16.000 I'm not.

00:26:17.000 Sorry, I'm not John, so I. No, you're not John.

00:26:20.000 I'm sorry.

00:26:20.000 You're not John.

00:26:21.000 You're not John, and you never will be.

00:26:24.000 No offense.

00:26:25.000 I don't want to be John.

00:26:27.000 I'm Strang.

00:26:28.000 Hi.

00:26:31.000 Hey, I've never called into any show before, so it's kind of odd.

00:26:36.000 But I'm actually calling because like a month ago, you talked about Andrew Yang living in New Paltz, which was news to me.

00:26:43.000 But I found it sort of striking that you thought New Paltz was a shithole, and then you asked Ryan if New Paltz was a shithole because you thought he lived nearby, which he did for some period of time.

00:26:56.000 And I can understand why Ryan might be considered an expert on shitholes.

00:27:02.000 But don't you have to not live in a shithole for a while to understand that, you know, what you're living in all the time in Newburgh and the Bronx is worse than other places?

00:27:17.000 Yeah.

00:27:18.000 I understand what you're saying.

00:27:20.000 You know what?

00:27:20.000 I'm sorry.

00:27:21.000 Are you from New Paltz?

00:27:22.000 Is that your beef?

00:27:23.000 I would party in New Paltz pretty often.

00:27:24.000 We play some shows there.

00:27:26.000 I'm your lone viewer from New Paltz.

00:27:28.000 I can assure you that there's no one else in this town that actually subscribes to Censored TV.

00:27:33.000 Wasn't there a shooting there recently where the cop shot a black dude for being an asshole and there was riots?

00:27:41.000 Did you hear Gavin's question?

00:27:42.000 He was asking, wasn't there a shooting there and there was a bunch of riots?

00:27:45.000 Like a cop shooting?

00:27:48.000 No, there was no cop shooting.

00:27:50.000 That might have been Newberg.

00:27:51.000 There was a guy I went to high school with that shot up downtown.

00:27:54.000 Oh, in Newberg?

00:27:56.000 I think it's Newberg.

00:27:56.000 It's Newberg.

00:27:59.000 All right.

00:27:59.000 Well, thanks for calling.

00:28:00.000 We'll try to be better in the future and give New Paltz a break.

00:28:05.000 I love New Paltz, but you called it a shithole.

00:28:07.000 What's worse, New Paltz or Newberg?

00:28:10.000 Oh, my God.

00:28:11.000 Newberg.

00:28:12.000 For sure.

00:28:13.000 New Paltz is a college town.

00:28:14.000 The thing I heard about Newberg when I moved upstate was it's a great place to get really cool vintage furniture because it's all blacks and they don't care about mid-century modern. 1.00

00:28:23.000 They don't know what that is.

00:28:24.000 They'd rather just go to IKEA.

00:28:26.000 So there's all this really cool furniture and it hasn't been scooped up by gays and liberals because they don't live there. 1.00

00:28:30.000 Yeah.

00:28:31.000 And we got an amazing piece of furniture.

00:28:33.000 It was sort of like this.

00:28:35.000 It had a sliding door and it was tiered, like doot, doot, doot, like a staircase.

00:28:38.000 And we put it next to our staircase.

00:28:40.000 And it went boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop.

00:28:42.000 And it had like, you open it up and this mini bar came out and it was lit.

00:28:46.000 Sick.

00:28:48.000 It was literally lit.

00:28:50.000 All right, next call.

00:28:54.000 Newberg is in Murder Capital?

00:28:56.000 That was Newberg.

00:28:57.000 Yeah, they got some violence.

00:28:59.000 Newberg.

00:29:00.000 Eddie, rather.

00:29:03.000 Yo.

00:29:04.000 Yo, can you hear me?

00:29:05.000 Yes.

00:29:07.000 Hey, I just wanted to say, I see y'all haven't talked about it much, but or at all, really.

00:29:14.000 Did you guys hear about the shooting at the gun range in Metore, Louisiana?

00:29:19.000 Yeah.

00:29:21.000 Oh, you did see it?

00:29:22.000 Okay, I don't really care about it.

00:29:25.000 Or AIU or somebody.

00:29:27.000 Should we care about it?

00:29:30.000 Oh, yeah, it was bad, man.

00:29:32.000 Some freaking black guy went into the gun range and they told him basically, man, you can't walk in here with that loaded gun.

00:29:39.000 And he said, oh, well, fuck you.

00:29:41.000 And just shot two people and injured a few others.

00:29:45.000 So he only killed two people?

00:29:50.000 He killed two people and injured a few others.

00:29:53.000 And he ultimately died.

00:29:54.000 Did they take him out?

00:29:55.000 I mean, because these are people with guns there.

00:29:57.000 Like, you would figure that's a well-protected place.

00:30:01.000 Absolutely.

00:30:01.000 Like, all total.

00:30:03.000 Like, hey, got the people shot at him.

00:30:04.000 Nice.

00:30:05.000 It was wild.

00:30:06.000 They got video of it.

00:30:08.000 Yeah, I saw the video.

00:30:09.000 I didn't even include it in the show notes.

00:30:11.000 I just thought, who cares?

00:30:12.000 It's only three people.

00:30:13.000 I mean, that's a pretty normal evening in Chicago and New York.

00:30:18.000 Louisiana's got bad crime, though, right?

00:30:20.000 I mean, I'm...

00:30:23.000 Not like talking about it.

00:30:24.000 Not a situation like that.

00:30:25.000 I mean, sometimes they shoot at each other in the hood, but I mean, just something random like that for no reason.

00:30:32.000 It seems a bit much.

00:30:33.000 It definitely is a bit much, but it was in the grand scheme of things.

00:30:37.000 I don't know why I didn't really give a shit.

00:30:40.000 Thanks for calling.

00:30:41.000 I mean, there's so many horrific murders, black on white crime that doesn't get talked about.

00:30:49.000 Like, you know, some black dude killing his white girlfriend's parents.

00:30:55.000 And if the races were reversed, it would be the biggest story on earth. 0.92

00:30:58.000 But like, if you look at right-wing Gringa's Instagram feed, and she'll just occasionally include some of these brutal, fucking sadistic murders, and you think, why isn't this ever reported?

00:31:14.000 Because it doesn't fit the narrative.

00:31:16.000 Oh, fuck.

00:31:16.000 You make one spelling mistake.

00:31:18.000 Remember there was that...

00:31:19.000 Ow! 1.00

00:31:22.000 There was that cup there.

00:31:23.000 There we go.

00:31:23.000 That's exactly what I'm talking about.

00:31:26.000 Unprovoked fatal shooting of Denver mom.

00:31:28.000 Or there was that couple at Wisconsin U. They were both professors at University of Wisconsin.

00:31:34.000 They were murdered on a nature trail.

00:31:37.000 And it was because they had objected to their daughter dating this black dude.

00:31:42.000 Not because he's black.

00:31:43.000 It's fucking Wisconsin.

00:31:44.000 They blow black people for free on every street corner. 1.00

00:31:47.000 But because he was a psycho killer, Quess Casey.

00:31:51.000 And he murdered them.

00:31:53.000 Killed them.

00:31:55.000 And there was all this controversy and what happened to them and blah, blah, blah.

00:31:58.000 We all knew what happened.

00:31:59.000 And it just doesn't get reported.

00:32:01.000 So when there's a shooting at a gun range, I don't know.

00:32:06.000 You know what?

00:32:06.000 I think I'd rather these sadistic crimes get reported.

00:32:09.000 Sounds like he was going there to shoot people.

00:32:10.000 I mean, because he goes there with a loaded gun, you know, and I mean, it's hard to believe that somebody who wasn't trying to kill people that day gets into an argument and then just does.

00:32:19.000 All right, let's take another call.

00:32:23.000 Jim swearing.

00:32:29.000 Jim, you're on the line.

00:32:31.000 Hi, Jim.

00:32:33.000 Hello, my bedwedding buddy.

00:32:36.000 And Father Felcher of the Fat Zone.

00:32:38.000 I sent you a link over.

00:32:39.000 I know you probably don't care about Canadian politics all that much, and I can't really blame you, even though I'll probably run as a candidate in the spring if there's an election.

00:32:49.000 Hey, whatever happened to your girlfriend that you're going to marry.

00:32:52.000 Jim.

00:32:53.000 I might.

00:32:54.000 Yeah.

00:32:55.000 Jim?

00:32:56.000 What happened to your girlfriend?

00:32:59.000 I haven't talked to her in a little while.

00:33:01.000 I might not be able to collect that C-note that you offered up.

00:33:06.000 Looks like you're not getting married after all.

00:33:10.000 I haven't made contact recently.

00:33:12.000 I've been a bad online fiancé.

00:33:16.000 Anyways, Prime Minister Cuck Trudeau wants to.

00:33:18.000 Wait a minute.

00:33:19.000 I've been a bad online fiancé.

00:33:21.000 So you guys are still engaged in your mind.

00:33:24.000 You just haven't been attentive enough.

00:33:29.000 Well, I don't know, bro.

00:33:31.000 I don't know how to describe it.

00:33:33.000 It's long-distance relationships.

00:33:34.000 I know how to describe it.

00:33:35.000 Complete bullshit, which is what I called when you first brought it up.

00:33:40.000 Anyway, thanks for calling, buddy.

00:33:46.000 And that's the end.

00:33:47.000 Harsh.

00:33:48.000 That's the end of the free portion of our show.

00:33:50.000 So you can see what it's like when you pay.

00:33:52.000 This is what happens 10 to 11 Wednesday nights, usually.

00:33:57.000 You got a taste of it from 9 to 9.35.

00:34:00.000 And if you don't like the calls, it's really just an hour a week.

00:34:04.000 And we do two hours a day, Monday to Thursday.

00:34:07.000 And then there's about 32 other shows.

00:34:09.000 We've got tons of new shows coming, new contributors I'm reluctant to talk about, like Jar and also Michael.

00:34:21.000 And of course, the inimitable Raw.

00:34:25.000 That's three big deals.

00:34:27.000 Oh, and of course, Drain.

00:34:30.000 Those are all...

00:34:31.000 I can't understand what you're saying.

00:34:32.000 So the two Draw and then a Mark and a Rock.

00:34:38.000 That was close, but that's four shows coming.

00:34:42.000 Damn.

00:34:43.000 So I'm off on the weekends, but the weekends are going to be busy as peas because busy as peas.

00:34:53.000 What was that supposed to be?

00:34:54.000 What was peas going to be?

00:34:55.000 I don't know.

00:34:56.000 They seem busy.

00:34:57.000 Don't they?

00:34:58.000 Peas.

00:34:58.000 When you put them on a plate and they're all rolling around.

00:35:02.000 It's not like a piece of pork that's just like laying down there.

00:35:07.000 I drank beer.

00:35:08.000 I like beer.

00:35:09.000 Peas zip around.

00:35:11.000 They seem busy.

00:35:12.000 Anyway, so we're going to continue the show, obviously, but this is going to be behind the paywall.

00:35:16.000 So the free portion is over.

00:35:18.000 You're done.

00:35:20.000 Don't turn that into a Zeke Heil by lying on your back and taking a picture upwards.

00:35:24.000 Get fired.

00:35:25.000 Get in trouble.

00:35:27.000 Well, I like to end the show with sort of a summation, a positive trait.

00:35:33.000 And I guess what I would say about the next four years, if you're not a liberal, is let's just watch the show.

00:35:41.000 Sit back, relax.

00:35:43.000 It's kids' day.

00:35:44.000 I give my kids Kids' Day once a year.

00:35:46.000 They play video games till 3 in the morning.

00:35:48.000 They eat Lucky Charms till they barf.

00:35:49.000 They feel like shit the next day.

00:35:51.000 I let them see what life would be like if they had no parents.

00:35:55.000 And it's pretty fun for a while, and then they feel terrible because they abuse themselves.

00:36:00.000 And that's what America's doing for the next four years.

00:36:02.000 They're abusing themselves.

00:36:03.000 So sit back and enjoy it.

00:36:05.000 Don't worry about Joe Biden bombing Syria.

00:36:08.000 We don't live there.

00:36:09.000 Just go, there's my pet Biden, my silly little turtle man, up to his old tricks again.

00:36:15.000 You know, I had the kids watch The Equalizer with Queen Latifah, and I was saying to my daughter, in front of my other boy, because I'm hoping he sort of understands it through her.

00:36:25.000 And I said, honey, TV is obviously all shit.

00:36:28.000 It's all garbage.

00:36:29.000 But when you can appreciate garbage, TV becomes fun.

00:36:33.000 And now you and I can watch The Equalizer and point out all the thousands of holes in the plot and make fun of the way they're dressed and the ridiculous fight scenes.

00:36:42.000 That's fun.

00:36:43.000 Now all the shows are fun.

00:36:45.000 Even the commercials are amusing.

00:36:46.000 When you learn to appreciate shit and see the tackiness of it, I guess you'd call it irony, all of a sudden a whole world of entertainment opens up to you.

00:36:55.000 So I think the next four years are going to be incredibly entertaining, folks.

00:36:59.000 Let's enjoy watching the liberals get exactly what they asked for, which is a shit show.

00:37:05.000 It's going to be funny.

00:37:07.000 It's already very amusing.

00:37:09.000 We have daily laughs at Biden's gaffes.

00:37:13.000 And then, of course, in four years, we'll get DeSantis or Matt Goetz or maybe even Trump back.

00:37:17.000 And we won't have to apologize for it because they'll see what happens when they're in control.

00:37:22.000 In the interim, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

00:38:10.000 Why wouldn't you, that was so long because Ryan had to go pee-pee like a little girl? 1.00

00:38:15.000 Why wouldn't you just wait till we had a caller, dude?

00:38:18.000 Because then I couldn't hang up on them if they stunk or something.

00:38:20.000 Oh, and then people would be bored.

00:38:22.000 Right?

00:38:23.000 Like staring at a fucking frozen picture, listening to hardcore while you pissed.

00:38:29.000 Eh?

00:38:31.000 In retrospect, that was a big mistake.

00:38:34.000 Everything you do is...

00:38:35.000 The biggest mistake your mother ever made was being pro-life. 0.90

00:38:39.000 That means she gay. 1.00

00:38:41.000 Sort of.

00:38:43.000 All right, next call.

00:38:45.000 Grant.

00:38:48.000 Hey, what's going on, guys?

00:38:50.000 How y'all doing this evening?

00:38:51.000 Good.

00:38:51.000 How are you?

00:38:54.000 Oh, man.

00:38:54.000 I can't complain.

00:38:55.000 Well, dude, I just got back from a military simulation up in Vicksburg, Mississippi at an abandoned hospital.

00:39:01.000 I totally think you should send Ryan to one, or even, you know, you and your oldest son should get into it.

00:39:07.000 It's pretty dope stuff.

00:39:09.000 And it's not for military training, it's just for fun.

00:39:11.000 You pay money and shit?

00:39:14.000 Oh, yeah, man.

00:39:15.000 It's great.

00:39:16.000 Like in my team, I have a grenade launcher on my gun and shit.

00:39:19.000 And yeah, I shoot pyro rounds off.

00:39:22.000 But this event that we just went to, the city wouldn't allow us.

00:39:25.000 But yeah, there was former military guys, guys with their sons.

00:39:28.000 And dude, it was just a blast.

00:39:31.000 And what shoots out of your gun?

00:39:35.000 It's a plastic BB.

00:39:37.000 It's a biodegradable airsoft BB.

00:39:40.000 But mine has a tracer unit on it.

00:39:42.000 So while we were inside of the hospital, all those rounds I was shooting, they were blowing up bright green.

00:39:48.000 So it looked really cool on my buddy's camera and shit.

00:39:51.000 And are you shooting zombies or who are you shooting?

00:39:55.000 People shooting people in different color camouflage.

00:39:59.000 I sent a video to the mailbag of me and some of my gear.

00:40:04.000 The subject line is fashionable or passed.

00:40:08.000 And I think you'd get a kick out of the video.

00:40:10.000 But dude, I'd be more than happy to send videos and pictures and stuff of what goes on with it.

00:40:16.000 I think it's something other than boxing that you can really do and really show your car.

00:40:20.000 Wait, you're not the guy who came out of his sunroof, are you?

00:40:24.000 We haven't watched that.

00:40:24.000 We haven't aired that yet.

00:40:25.000 Dude, that was me.

00:40:26.000 That's me.

00:40:27.000 That's me.

00:40:28.000 Uh-oh.

00:40:28.000 That was terrible.

00:40:30.000 You had cranberry juice.

00:40:31.000 You didn't have real cranberry juice.

00:40:33.000 Dude, that's my kind of shit.

00:40:34.000 But you didn't have real cranberry juice and the car wasn't even moving.

00:40:40.000 What?

00:40:43.000 One of my magazines has get fired, get in trouble, be brave, never stop fighting.

00:40:48.000 And the other side says, get off my lawn.

00:40:50.000 I know, but you did the Fleetwood Mac meme.

00:40:52.000 You did the Fleetwood Mac meme, and you didn't even have Fleetwood Mac playing.

00:40:56.000 I mean, for real, and you didn't have real cranberry juice.

00:40:59.000 We could hear it.

00:41:00.000 Well, we could hear it, but you should have put it in post.

00:41:03.000 And also, your cranberry juice was just water.

00:41:07.000 No, it was white cranberry juice.

00:41:10.000 Oh.

00:41:10.000 I never heard of that.

00:41:12.000 Sounds like a lie cranberry juice.

00:41:14.000 Yeah, it's pretty good.

00:41:15.000 It's nice and sweet, but smooth.

00:41:18.000 I never heard of white cranberry juice.

00:41:21.000 I've heard of a lie before.

00:41:22.000 No, I'm kidding.

00:41:23.000 I'm sure it exists.

00:41:24.000 All right.

00:41:24.000 Thanks for calling, dude.

00:41:25.000 We've already given you too much attention.

00:41:27.000 Didn't we show that on the banked app?

00:41:31.000 It's a banked app.

00:41:31.000 All right.

00:41:34.000 It was a good one.

00:41:35.000 Hey, Dominic is on the laser.

00:41:40.000 Hey, what's up, guys?

00:41:41.000 What's up?

00:41:42.000 Hey, man.

00:41:42.000 Can you hear me?

00:41:44.000 I sure can.

00:41:46.000 All right, nice.

00:41:47.000 First time, long time.

00:41:48.000 Thank you for your service, Gavin.

00:41:50.000 You're welcome.

00:41:52.000 Awesome.

00:41:53.000 So I just wanted to tell you guys a little story of something that happened about a week or so ago.

00:41:58.000 You know, I try really, really hard not to use offensive language.

00:42:01.000 You know, I don't want to contribute to people's feelings of inadequacy or anything like that.

00:42:07.000 But I was watching one of your episodes and you played one of Ryan's songs.

00:42:12.000 I can't remember the name of it, Up and Down or something like that.

00:42:15.000 Oh, yeah, that's brutal, isn't it?

00:42:17.000 Up and down.

00:42:18.000 Oh, my God.

00:42:19.000 It was so bad.

00:42:20.000 So out of nowhere, while watching it, I just went into a trance and I just couldn't help myself.

00:42:25.000 I just started shouting out the word, faggot. 1.00

00:42:32.000 A fucking homo. 1.00

00:42:34.000 Oh, my God.

00:42:35.000 What a queer. 1.00

00:42:36.000 Fucking Ryan.

00:42:37.000 This is what you do to me.

00:42:38.000 I don't like that song.

00:42:40.000 I think you're being way too nice to Ryan.

00:42:43.000 I mean, queers are way cooler than that song could ever be. 1.00

00:42:48.000 It's sub-fag. 0.99

00:42:49.000 I think you're right.

00:42:50.000 I think it's not one of my best songs.

00:42:54.000 You need to kill yourself, man.

00:42:56.000 Yeah, that's some good advice.

00:42:58.000 All right, thanks for calling.

00:42:59.000 We're going to dig that song up.

00:43:00.000 I'm not going to kill myself.

00:43:02.000 Ideally, you will.

00:43:03.000 I won't.

00:43:04.000 But let's look at...

00:43:04.000 Where is that song?

00:43:05.000 Find that.

00:43:06.000 I felt Hodge take it off of the internet.

00:43:09.000 You did not.

00:43:09.000 Yeah, I did.

00:43:10.000 Yeah, I did.

00:43:11.000 You pussy. 1.00

00:43:12.000 Yeah, I know.

00:43:12.000 I couldn't do it.

00:43:13.000 Like, when you played it, I felt so bad inside myself.

00:43:16.000 My body and my soul.

00:43:18.000 So that video of you, like, in the movie theater and then not in the movie theater is gone?

00:43:22.000 Yeah.

00:43:22.000 You pussy.

00:43:24.000 Yeah.

00:43:24.000 That hurts the show.

00:43:27.000 I have better songs, okay?

00:43:28.000 They're out there.

00:43:29.000 If you go to anything, you'll find Nope Yup, and it's good. 1.00

00:43:33.000 No, it's not.

00:43:34.000 I got some good ones.

00:43:35.000 All right, next call.

00:43:36.000 That's too bad that you did that.

00:43:38.000 Ups and downs.

00:43:40.000 Zach is on the line.

00:43:48.000 Yo, yo. 0.99

00:43:50.000 Yo.

00:43:51.000 Can you hear me?

00:43:52.000 Yeah.

00:43:54.000 Anyways, the Car Guys show, which was pretty cool.

00:43:58.000 I know you guys don't know a whole lot about guns.

00:44:00.000 I figured you guys could do something with like a gunsmith, and he could show you all the shit that you don't know about guns.

00:44:07.000 Yeah.

00:44:08.000 And maybe you might learn something.

00:44:10.000 Yeah, I would like to go to that place Tucker went to.

00:44:13.000 Hickcock 45?

00:44:15.000 Yeah.

00:44:16.000 Yeah, Hickok 45 is his shit.

00:44:18.000 That range is actually like his house is right behind the camera.

00:44:21.000 So it's like right off his porch.

00:44:24.000 Wow, that's awesome.

00:44:25.000 I had no idea that.

00:44:25.000 Where is he?

00:44:26.000 They say they're in Alaska.

00:44:27.000 They're not in Alaska, right?

00:44:28.000 No.

00:44:28.000 Was it Nashville?

00:44:29.000 No, he's in Tennessee.

00:44:31.000 He's in Nashville.

00:44:33.000 I'm moving to Tennessee.

00:44:34.000 That's it?

00:44:35.000 I decided.

00:44:36.000 Damn.

00:44:38.000 There you go.

00:44:38.000 There's plenty of fucking gunsmiths over there.

00:44:42.000 Okay, good tip, dude.

00:44:43.000 We'll check it out.

00:44:43.000 Thanks for calling.

00:44:45.000 When Tennessee?

00:44:47.000 I just feel it in my gut.

00:44:48.000 No, not why.

00:44:49.000 Oh, that's awesome.

00:44:51.000 But when?

00:44:51.000 I don't know.

00:44:54.000 We got to kind of go with the kids' school.

00:44:55.000 So it's either this September or next September.

00:44:57.000 Ooh, that's exciting.

00:44:59.000 But I just want to say I'm from Tennessee.

00:45:03.000 Yeah, that is pretty cool.

00:45:04.000 Hi, I live in Knoxville, Tennessee.

00:45:06.000 And I want to wear no shirt, white pants, white cowboy boots, and a white cowboy hat.

00:45:11.000 It gets cold in Tennessee, too.

00:45:14.000 You know, you like that?

00:45:14.000 Sure, it does.

00:45:16.000 Yeah.

00:45:17.000 I just feel like in Florida, I'd be hiding in the basement crying for two months.

00:45:22.000 Petrified.

00:45:24.000 Tennessee is a good place on the map, too, because you can travel out west real quick, down south real quick.

00:45:31.000 Well, I've been looking at a map very carefully, and eastern Tennessee, North Carolina, South Carolina, that seems to be the magic spot.

00:45:40.000 I'm sad there's no baseball teams there, but that seems to be the only flaw.

00:45:44.000 And I can only imagine the fucking dive bars and how awesome they are.

00:45:49.000 Forget about it.

00:45:51.000 XCOMer.

00:45:52.000 What is it?

00:45:53.000 George.

00:45:57.000 Hey.

00:45:58.000 Hey.

00:45:58.000 What are you wearing?

00:46:00.000 I'm wearing a band sweatshirt that supports...

00:46:03.000 Oh, sorry.

00:46:06.000 I tried to add Amy Siskin on Instagram so I could comment on her shit about having sex with a pregnant woman. 1.00

00:46:16.000 And so I tried to follow her and I checked back the next day and she declined it.

00:46:21.000 Oh, I tried again, and then she declined it again.

00:46:26.000 Well, you really want to get her on Twitter.

00:46:33.000 I'm not on Twitter.

00:46:34.000 Well, get on Twitter.

00:46:36.000 Get on Twitter.

00:46:37.000 She's got some big talk coming up that you have to DM her to see.

00:46:41.000 But of course, she's going to check your other tweets before she okays it.

00:46:46.000 But she really, I can't stress enough how Amy Siskin has to be called on her bullshit. 1.00

00:46:52.000 Please follow her on Twitter and call her out every time she bullshits, which is on a 100% basis.

00:47:01.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

00:47:02.000 And screenshot because she deletes her shit. 0.73

00:47:04.000 Yeah, she deletes her retarded shit. 1.00

00:47:06.000 But I wish I could get on there and fuck with her because she's just so, she just sums up the problem so beautifully. 1.00

00:47:15.000 This is Steve.

00:47:19.000 Yo.

00:47:21.000 What's up, girl?

00:47:22.000 Yes, Queen.

00:47:24.000 Let's go.

00:47:25.000 How'd you like that Dusty in person?

00:47:28.000 Oh, I didn't...

00:47:29.000 Dude, what are you doing?

00:47:30.000 Dusty.

00:47:33.000 Yo! 1.00

00:47:34.000 Just smacking some beers over here. 0.98

00:47:37.000 Well, the accent's off, but I...

00:47:39.000 Who's that?

00:47:40.000 Who's Dusty?

00:47:41.000 Our Bogan.

00:47:41.000 Our own Bogan.

00:47:42.000 Oh, Jesus.

00:47:43.000 That was terrible.

00:47:46.000 That literally made my ribs hurt.

00:47:48.000 It was so bad.

00:47:52.000 All right.

00:47:52.000 Thanks for calling.

00:47:58.000 He was trying to get something out, and then he realized what happened.

00:48:00.000 That was a sad one.

00:48:01.000 Daniel is on the line.

00:48:05.000 Hey, how's it going, guys?

00:48:06.000 What's up, dog?

00:48:09.000 Yo, yo. 0.99

00:48:10.000 Hey, thanks for shit.

00:48:12.000 I just emailed y'all about taking more calls last week, and I appreciate taking the advice.

00:48:18.000 Yeah.

00:48:19.000 I was the one bitching. 1.00

00:48:20.000 You're in.

00:48:22.000 Sweet, yeah.

00:48:24.000 So I noticed y'all, and I always enjoy when you guys try to master the art and science of rating women on their looks. 0.99

00:48:35.000 And I find myself doing that a lot.

00:48:39.000 One thing I've been trying to wrap my head around lately, because I always try to think of stuff that makes me angrier, and I find that y'all do that on the show as well.

00:48:49.000 Do you think you could come up with a fag slash gay scale of things that are just pathetic and illusory? 1.00

00:48:59.000 It's kind of like a little, almost like a little mental Rubik's cube here.

00:49:03.000 It's called Everything Ryan Does.

00:49:06.000 So if everything I is on.

00:49:08.000 He bought a turquoise hand-knitted hat from Etsy.

00:49:15.000 That's up there.

00:49:16.000 That's going to be high on there.

00:49:19.000 Yeah.

00:49:20.000 But do you think it's possible?

00:49:23.000 Because every time I think in this fucking clown world we live in, every time I think, oh, that's like the faggiest thing I've ever seen, the next day, my jaw is broken off. 1.00

00:49:33.000 It's off.

00:49:35.000 Because of how pathetic 2020, 2021 has become.

00:49:39.000 I know, eh?

00:49:40.000 Think of all the people when you read these absurd things, like Dr. Zeus being canceled.

00:49:45.000 Think of all the men who go, yeah, good.

00:49:48.000 I hated the way he drew Chinks.

00:49:51.000 Like, that's truly disturbing is the ones who aren't outraged and go, well, you know, a lot of his drawings are antiquated.

00:50:01.000 Pathetic.

00:50:02.000 Yeah, the people are canceling that extremely high on a fag scale. 1.00

00:50:06.000 But anyway, thanks for taking my call, guys.

00:50:08.000 And on your feet, soldier.

00:50:10.000 Oh, that was a good one.

00:50:12.000 Look, you know who I just found the hottest woman I've ever seen in my fucking life. 1.00

00:50:16.000 Her name is Dawn, and she's in Croods 2.

00:50:21.000 She's a 10.

00:50:24.000 I hope she's not a child.

00:50:26.000 There's an animated broad, right?

00:50:28.000 Yes.

00:50:28.000 That's her on the right.

00:50:29.000 I don't know if you could.

00:50:31.000 That's kind of like anime simping.

00:50:33.000 I hope she's not an infant.

00:50:35.000 Well, she's a cartoon. 1.00

00:50:36.000 She's a 10.

00:50:38.000 That's my dream girl right there.

00:50:40.000 Dawn.

00:50:41.000 Dawn.

00:50:41.000 What's her name?

00:50:42.000 She's Dawn.

00:50:43.000 I think she's a Jew. 1.00

00:50:45.000 Maybe she's a Jew. 1.00

00:50:46.000 So the Judes?

00:50:48.000 The Judes. 0.83

00:50:49.000 They'll only pay one rock.

00:50:53.000 There she is.

00:50:54.000 Joyride.

00:50:56.000 Joyride?

00:50:56.000 Sounds dumb.

00:50:57.000 Where'd you go?

00:50:58.000 I took Chuckie for a joyride.

00:51:00.000 Joyride?

00:51:01.000 Joyride?

00:51:02.000 We rolled to death.

00:51:03.000 Outside the wall.

00:51:05.000 You took Dawn for a joyride outside the wall.

00:51:10.000 Yeah.

00:51:10.000 Well, the Vettermans, they don't want Dawn outside the wall.

00:51:12.000 They're a Veterman. 1.00

00:51:14.000 For a reason, you know, to keep everyone safe.

00:51:16.000 Guy, relax.

00:51:18.000 Yeah, guy.

00:51:18.000 Take it down.

00:51:21.000 Is she drunk?

00:51:22.000 What's wrong with her? 1.00

00:51:23.000 It's just a reaction to the B Venom.

00:51:25.000 B Venom?

00:51:26.000 Bee Venom! 0.98

00:51:27.000 What the f ⁇ ?

00:51:30.000 Just a little bee sting.

00:51:31.000 Hey, you're not the boss of me.

00:51:35.000 What does she look like? 0.94

00:51:36.000 She looks like somebody.

00:51:37.000 She looks like my wife.

00:51:38.000 And she acts like her after two glasses of wine.

00:51:41.000 All right, next call.

00:51:42.000 It's called Bee Venom.

00:51:44.000 You know, we have a pet Biden bumper somebody sent in?

00:51:47.000 Oh, cool.

00:51:48.000 Yep.

00:51:48.000 You want to check it out?

00:51:50.000 Of course I do.

00:51:50.000 That's true.

00:51:54.000 Biden.

00:51:55.000 On him I can depend.

00:51:58.000 My pet.

00:51:59.000 Biden.

00:52:00.000 A monster of the president.

00:52:02.000 He's big and smooth.

00:52:03.000 Sleepy.

00:52:04.000 But a friendly monster too.

00:52:07.000 My pet.

00:52:08.000 Biden.

00:52:08.000 Wait, what?

00:52:09.000 That doesn't rhyme.

00:52:13.000 Wow.

00:52:15.000 I mean, I could spend months with that.

00:52:18.000 What's that thing we use, that app that they advertise on Stern to hire people?

00:52:23.000 I forget what it's called, but I could spend months trying to find someone to make us interstitials.

00:52:28.000 But that is fucking quality.

00:52:30.000 That's exactly what I wanted, but better.

00:52:33.000 It's funny, too.

00:52:35.000 Wow, that's very funny.

00:52:37.000 Who did that? 0.91

00:52:39.000 Daniel.

00:52:40.000 Blow him. 0.99

00:52:41.000 I'm on it, sir.

00:52:42.000 I command you to blow him.

00:52:44.000 No problem.

00:52:45.000 I had the urge to do so extracurricularly.

00:52:48.000 Well, get on it.

00:52:49.000 Okay.

00:52:50.000 Get on it and get it in, your fucking chinky Puerto Rican bouche. 1.00

00:52:54.000 Get on.

00:52:55.000 Get in and get on.

00:52:56.000 Get in.

00:52:56.000 Stand black and stand blind.

00:52:59.000 Stand back and stand blown because I'm coming in.

00:53:03.000 I'm going to come.

00:53:04.000 Justin is in the line.

00:53:08.000 Hello?

00:53:09.000 I'm going to come.

00:53:12.000 Yo, Justin.

00:53:14.000 Oh, John.

00:53:15.000 No, Justin.

00:53:16.000 There's just us.

00:53:18.000 You got disconnected before, now you're back.

00:53:20.000 Oh, what the fuck?

00:53:21.000 He hung up again.

00:53:23.000 Maybe he has a shitty connection.

00:53:25.000 Maybe.

00:53:26.000 Maybe, man.

00:53:27.000 That's his thing.

00:53:30.000 All right, now we got.

00:53:31.000 Wow, that's crazy, man.

00:53:34.000 Peanuts.

00:53:37.000 Hello?

00:53:38.000 Hello?

00:53:41.000 What's going on, zipperheads? 1.00

00:53:44.000 Nothing.

00:53:45.000 Did you know zips are Italians? 0.99

00:53:50.000 Oh, actually, didn't know that.

00:53:51.000 Yeah.

00:53:53.000 Zipper heads are rice balls, but zips are Italians. 1.00

00:53:58.000 Anyway, go ahead.

00:53:59.000 Did you know that I'm a care?

00:54:04.000 That's funny.

00:54:07.000 Anywho, I just wanted to say one thing about AOC.

00:54:10.000 First of all, she is mildly hot. 0.99

00:54:13.000 Secondly, I've noticed a pattern with the Democratic Party where when they don't get their way, they constantly shift the goalpost and they'll say conservative Democrats so that they don't blame themselves.

00:54:29.000 It's like, no, it's not us.

00:54:30.000 It's the conservatives in our party.

00:54:34.000 And then it's like, pretty soon, the margin is going to become soaked in.

00:54:38.000 And I guess people will realize, holy shit, we've been lied to the entire time.

00:54:43.000 What do you think?

00:54:44.000 Or are people just dumb enough?

00:54:45.000 Give me an example.

00:54:46.000 Like, who are they calling a conservative Democrat?

00:54:49.000 Are they saying that about Cuomo?

00:54:54.000 For example, the $1,400 checks, Biden ran on $2,000.

00:54:59.000 Now it's $1,400 plus they took out the $15 an hour thing.

00:55:04.000 That was what he promised.

00:55:05.000 Now AOC is covering saying it was actually Manchin and the conservative Democrats that don't want to push for that along with the GOP.

00:55:16.000 So it's actually them that are holding up the relief for Americans. 0.82

00:55:20.000 And so it's constantly blaming the GOP with conservatives in their own party.

00:55:26.000 So it's just interesting that it's always the right's fault. 0.97

00:55:29.000 And also it always circles back to Trump regardless of what Biden's doing.

00:55:32.000 I know.

00:55:33.000 How long are they going to be able to do that?

00:55:35.000 How long are they going to constantly, like, are they going to be able in three years to say classic Trump cleaning up his mess?

00:55:44.000 It's even the case with Cuomo's sexual assault allegations.

00:55:47.000 It's like, yeah, where was the menia with Trump?

00:55:50.000 Literally up his asshole, raping his whole family?

00:55:54.000 I mean, yeah, they never shut the fuck up about it.

00:55:59.000 Ever.

00:56:00.000 But anyway, I love you guys.

00:56:01.000 Thanks for taking up my call.

00:56:04.000 Appreciate you guys.

00:56:05.000 Right on.

00:56:06.000 All right.

00:56:06.000 That was one of our rare Mexican callers.

00:56:09.000 Oh, you think he was Mexican?

00:56:10.000 Yeah, I think he was Mexican, man.

00:56:11.000 I think he was from East LA.

00:56:15.000 Oh, Josh is on the line.

00:56:18.000 Hey, boys.

00:56:20.000 Hey, so I was reading this book called Caste by Isabel Wilkerson.

00:56:25.000 It's a horrendous book.

00:56:26.000 It's about how blacks have been kept down due to this caste system.

00:56:31.000 Whatever.

00:56:31.000 It doesn't really matter.

00:56:32.000 But it's lauded for its deep research.

00:56:35.000 And it just can't be true that this author did any research because if I was to write a piece about why the New York Yankees were bad for baseball, well, I wouldn't go to Mets and Red Sox fans and ask them why.

00:56:47.000 Like, I already know.

00:56:49.000 So it just kind of, if I can't make the case for what I'm against, well, then what the hell am I even writing a piece about?

00:56:57.000 Like, it seems to me that if I can't make the case, so in light of this Dr. Seuss thing, if I can't make a case that's pro-cancel culture, then what the hell am I even writing about if I'm, you know what I mean?

00:57:09.000 How could I be against it if I can't articulate why I'm against it?

00:57:13.000 So I was racking my brain to try and figure out just how I would make the case to be pro-cancel culture.

00:57:20.000 And Java Ryan, I got to tell you, I got nothing.

00:57:23.000 So I was wondering if you guys could possibly make the case.

00:57:29.000 Why be pro-cancel culture?

00:57:33.000 Is that your question?

00:57:37.000 Okay, I'll assume it's your question.

00:57:38.000 Yes.

00:57:39.000 You're pro-cancel culture because it's power.

00:57:42.000 Like, I can't fuck with LeBron James.

00:57:46.000 If we played one-on-one, I would lose.

00:57:48.000 He's way better than me.

00:57:49.000 And even if I practiced a whole bunch, I could never approach his talent.

00:57:54.000 But if I could somehow call him racist or anti-Semitic, all of a sudden, little old me sitting at my computer has this power where I can rally the troops against him.

00:58:08.000 I find him saying the word chink one day.

00:58:11.000 Thanks for calling, by the way.

00:58:12.000 And I hold that against him.

00:58:14.000 I get all these Asian people to boycott him. 1.00

00:58:16.000 And now I'm in LeBron James's league.

00:58:18.000 We're the same person.

00:58:20.000 I'm big enough to crush him.

00:58:22.000 So I'm as big as his fucking coaches and the owner of the team and his agent and all these people.

00:58:28.000 All of a sudden, I'm elevated to his status.

00:58:30.000 So, people who can't make it up with meritocracy, they can't make it up to, I want to say our levels, but anyone's level, they use this cancel culture as a tool to give them a leg up.

00:58:42.000 And it's fucking pathetic, evil, deranged, but it works.

00:58:48.000 So, I totally understand their narrative.

00:58:50.000 And that's why I was so impressed when Ron Coleman said these people are Bolsheviks. 0.97

00:58:55.000 All Bolsheviks care about is power. 0.93

00:58:58.000 And the proof of it is secular Jews shitting on Israel. 1.00

00:59:01.000 So, you're so determined to win that you'll shit on your homeland.

00:59:04.000 You'll shit on Israel just to get a leg up. 0.95

00:59:07.000 And that's why they like that shit.

00:59:08.000 It's the same reason that a moron like Ryan says dinosaurs don't exist.

00:59:13.000 It's the same reason women get into astrology. 1.00

00:59:16.000 It's like, I don't want to do the work.

00:59:18.000 I just want to jump to the end and be in the same league as someone at the end.

00:59:24.000 This is the drawing I made, by the way.

00:59:27.000 It's got lots of shading on the letters.

00:59:32.000 That looks like it was printed.

00:59:35.000 Because it's so beautiful?

00:59:36.000 Well, yeah, and it's consistent.

00:59:39.000 It doesn't look like there's any flaws in it.

00:59:42.000 Yeah, that's called being amazing.

00:59:44.000 Okay, never mind.

00:59:46.000 Here is Justin again.

00:59:53.000 Hey, guys.

00:59:54.000 Sorry about that.

00:59:54.000 Can you hear me?

00:59:55.000 Yep.

00:59:56.000 Third time's a charm.

00:59:57.000 Hey, Gav, right?

00:59:59.000 I'm an idiot.

01:00:00.000 I have you guys in a coffee can because it makes the phone louder.

01:00:04.000 So sorry about that.

01:00:05.000 I'm just being an idiot.

01:00:06.000 But Gav, I wanted to know your thoughts on Howard this week.

01:00:10.000 And did you pick up on the few times that kind of gave the impression that there's big parts of the show that's pre-recorded now?

01:00:16.000 Whoa.

01:00:17.000 No, I actually haven't gone to the gym because of my ribs.

01:00:20.000 So I haven't really heard that much of Stern.

01:00:23.000 I heard him bitching about more COVID shit.

01:00:27.000 I heard Ronnie Mund.

01:00:29.000 I heard a great poem Ronnie Mund wrote about winter, which was amazing.

01:00:33.000 But no, I didn't hear that much this week.

01:00:39.000 I love him bitching at everyone for not getting the vaccine when you know he would never get the vaccine at gunpoint.

01:00:46.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:00:47.000 The whole thing with him, it's like, just wear the mask, get the vaccine.

01:00:51.000 It's like, dude, you've been sitting in your basement for about a year at this point.

01:00:55.000 You're still microwaving your blueberries with baking soda.

01:00:59.000 Literally, he is.

01:01:00.000 He's not the expert on COVID anymore.

01:01:02.000 Yeah, he is.

01:01:03.000 He washes them with baking soda and stuff.

01:01:05.000 What the?

01:01:08.000 But also, do you think it's funny?

01:01:10.000 I think it was last week, or maybe it was Monday.

01:01:13.000 It kind of blends together anymore.

01:01:14.000 But a caller actually got through and asked him about Como.

01:01:17.000 I was like, well, why aren't you saying about this?

01:01:19.000 And he was like, you know, I don't talk about politics.

01:01:23.000 This is a political show.

01:01:24.000 And it was just like steamrolled over the next question.

01:01:26.000 And then today and then yesterday, he opens up the show with bitching about how the governor of Texas sucks because of the whole power issue.

01:01:35.000 And now with the thing with them lifting the mask mandates and the lockdown.

01:01:39.000 And I was just like, dude, when are you, you had Come on twice, twice.

01:01:44.000 You had guests on that were like begging him to like have sex with them and you have no comment with it now? 0.56

01:01:49.000 It just.

01:01:51.000 Yeah, I think that was last week.

01:01:52.000 So he was making fun of Texas.

01:01:54.000 The Texas case is bizarre because we look at it and we go, wind turbines, fucking solar, what were you thinking?

01:02:02.000 Why didn't you have coal?

01:02:03.000 And yeah, they froze.

01:02:05.000 They're inefficient ways to power things.

01:02:08.000 And then the left is like, why didn't you guys have special de-icing machines on your retarded wind turbines? 0.97

01:02:15.000 That's because you're right wing.

01:02:16.000 And it's like, well, you told us there's global warming.

01:02:19.000 It's never going to get cold here.

01:02:21.000 And it got cold.

01:02:22.000 So the right sees Texas as a great example of why you'll need fossil fuels.

01:02:26.000 And the left sees Texas as a great example of how unprepared these stupid rednecks are in Texas. 1.00

01:02:33.000 I don't get it.

01:02:34.000 But yeah, Stern wouldn't shut up about the government and how great they are at supplying power and how great they are at everything.

01:02:41.000 And you need government.

01:02:42.000 You need intellectuals.

01:02:43.000 He reveres bureaucrats to a disturbing level.

01:02:46.000 And after shitting on Texas, doing a Southern accent, by the way, and how stupid Southerners are.

01:02:53.000 Yeah, oh, I'm from Texas.

01:02:55.000 I don't like education.

01:02:56.000 I just like my guns.

01:02:58.000 He was doing that stupid hack shit.

01:03:00.000 And then a Texan, a dumb old Texan, we already talked about this.

01:03:03.000 He called in and he goes, how about Cuomo?

01:03:06.000 And then all of a sudden, on a dime, Starn goes, look, I'm not political.

01:03:09.000 I don't know what he should have done, what he shouldn't have done.

01:03:12.000 I know what he shouldn't have done.

01:03:13.000 Murdered old people. 1.00

01:03:15.000 We had a giant ship come into our harbor that no one used.

01:03:19.000 We had all of Central Park used up with tents.

01:03:23.000 No one was in them.

01:03:24.000 I was there.

01:03:25.000 They were empty.

01:03:27.000 The ship went home.

01:03:30.000 Yeah, they built two, I think it was two hospitals and they sent the ship, the big ship, the Red Cross ship.

01:03:36.000 And I think they sent two patients over there.

01:03:39.000 He has no standing.

01:03:41.000 It's completely inexcusable other than trying to save money towards their Medicaid payments.

01:03:46.000 That's the only reason I could think of why they sent all the old people to their death, just to relieve their budget so they didn't have to put out so much for a Medicaid patient. 1.00

01:03:53.000 But weren't those tents and that boat paid for by FEMA?

01:03:56.000 Isn't that a federal cost?

01:03:59.000 I don't know.

01:04:00.000 That's a good question.

01:04:01.000 I don't know.

01:04:02.000 But yeah, it was a pathetic shit show.

01:04:03.000 And the fact that he's getting pilloried for this kind of crap with the girls, I'll take it.

01:04:09.000 Whatever.

01:04:09.000 I mean, if you catch him not wiping his ass, fine, as long as he's on people's radar, the left will cannibalize him.

01:04:16.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

01:04:17.000 I'm just glad to see him suffer.

01:04:19.000 Did you just force quit the calls?

01:04:21.000 No.

01:04:22.000 Kevin Smith actually shed some light on what he's like, you know, off the thing.

01:04:28.000 You know, like his kind of integrity as a cocksucker? 1.00

01:04:32.000 How'd you know that?

01:04:32.000 Oh, you saw this clip before.

01:04:35.000 That day when he had me on, he had this kind of really reductive, like, Kevin Smith is always calling in and trying to be on this show that broke my heart.

01:04:42.000 I was like, I've never once called this show asking to be on it with the exception of this time to promote this DVD.

01:04:49.000 And at that point, I was just like, you feel weird.

01:04:52.000 Like, you're going over to some dude's house who's the popular kid, and then when you're there with him alone in the room, he's nice to you, but then when other people are looking, he's like, look at that guy.

01:04:59.000 That guy's a loser, everybody, right?

01:05:01.000 I'd like to go to Opian Anthony, and you can literally sit there, and those dudes are like, take the ball, dude, tell stories.

01:05:05.000 Like, we talk all the time.

01:05:06.000 You talk, tell your stories.

01:05:08.000 So, for me, I'd much rather go a place where they shared a ball and they're not going to make you feel bad.

01:05:12.000 Like, just to get on the show.

01:05:13.000 You're talking about Chris Cuomo or Anthony?

01:05:16.000 He's talking about Opian Anthony.

01:05:18.000 I know, but who was he originally talking about?

01:05:23.000 This was a while ago, so he was trying to promote.

01:05:25.000 Why did you just play that, Ryan?

01:05:27.000 Because that's some insight onto Howard Stern.

01:05:29.000 So he's nice to him.

01:05:30.000 Oh, he's talking about Howard Stern.

01:05:31.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:05:31.000 Oh, yeah, okay.

01:05:33.000 So he was, you know, he's friendly with him and stuff like that.

01:05:36.000 But then in a group of people, he'll throw him under the bus and be like, well, Kevin's fat and he's stupid and his movies suck.

01:05:41.000 No, he didn't say that.

01:05:41.000 He said he was always trying to get on the show.

01:05:43.000 Okay, next caller.

01:05:46.000 Oh, my arm.

01:05:48.000 I'm so Matthew talking about the Great Pyramids.

01:05:51.000 What's up, Matt?

01:05:54.000 Hello, Gavin and Gavin's least favorite son.

01:06:00.000 I'd like to say the two-hour servings for shows, I like them.

01:06:05.000 I'd like to say one to eat and one to enjoy.

01:06:10.000 I wanted to mention the Proud Boys Respond episode at 40 minutes, 47 seconds.

01:06:17.000 The lesbian, you said, his name is John Doyle. 0.62

01:06:21.000 I'd just like to give him a word.

01:06:23.000 He has a lot of values that coincide with yours.

01:06:29.000 I think you might approve.

01:06:31.000 Okay.

01:06:32.000 But as far as my question, topics like the existence of dinosaurs, which has been very entertaining, saga up until now, I just would like to know what you guys think about how the Great Pyramids were made.

01:06:47.000 I'd like to say that I'm convinced that it was made by a technologically advanced society that was long lost.

01:06:56.000 Not speaking aliens, just like pre-deluge.

01:07:01.000 The claim is they were erased from the surface of the earth pretty much by the great flood.

01:07:09.000 I think it was made by slaves, by Arabs, and they used sand as scaffolding to pile it up high, high, high. 1.00

01:07:17.000 And they would make a layer by rolling giant stones on logs.

01:07:23.000 And they would place it.

01:07:25.000 And then they would add sand to that layer and then do it again.

01:07:28.000 And they kept going to the top.

01:07:29.000 So by the time they're at the top, you just saw this massive hill of sand.

01:07:34.000 And then they blew or took the sand away over time and you had a pyramid.

01:07:39.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

01:07:41.000 Aliens did not make the fucking pyramids.

01:07:43.000 Jesus Christ.

01:07:44.000 This is what happens.

01:07:45.000 It's funny because I always say we don't need education.

01:07:48.000 Stop education.

01:07:49.000 And then all these uneducated people clearly have a craving for knowledge and are coming up with bullshit like dinosaurs don't exist.

01:07:57.000 Egyptians didn't make the pyramids. 0.68

01:08:00.000 9-11 was a bunch of fucking, what's it called? 0.52

01:08:03.000 Seamite?

01:08:04.000 That thermite.

01:08:07.000 That's all thermite.

01:08:08.000 People think the election was meddled with, too.

01:08:11.000 A lot of crazy people out there.

01:08:13.000 A lot of crazy people.

01:08:14.000 They think that COVID is overblown.

01:08:17.000 So they have to stop asking questions and learn.

01:08:22.000 Ronnie is on the line.

01:08:26.000 Ronald McDonald?

01:08:27.000 Go ahead, RDOG.

01:08:29.000 Make sure your kids are okay.

01:08:39.000 Let's try.

01:08:40.000 We'll keep him on and then take somebody else to see.

01:08:45.000 Matt?

01:08:49.000 Oh, it does work.

01:08:51.000 Hello?

01:08:52.000 Who's this?

01:08:53.000 Hi.

01:08:54.000 Matt Andrews.

01:08:56.000 Gotcha.

01:08:56.000 All right.

01:08:57.000 What's up?

01:08:58.000 Do you hear me?

01:08:59.000 Yes.

01:09:01.000 Oh, okay.

01:09:02.000 Sorry.

01:09:02.000 I don't know if Gav remembers me.

01:09:04.000 We did like a podcast together a while ago, but I was wondering what his opinion on Sebastian Gorka is.

01:09:11.000 Just like food for thought.

01:09:14.000 I remember you.

01:09:15.000 We were at this retreat, business retreat, and I did a podcast with you.

01:09:22.000 I made fun of you a lot for being a virgin.

01:09:25.000 I barely remembered it.

01:09:26.000 I was wasted.

01:09:27.000 And you tried to get Sebastian Gorka on the show, and he said, fuck you, because you had Loomer on the show.

01:09:33.000 Yeah.

01:09:35.000 Yeah.

01:09:36.000 And basically, I said, like, I just gave him my list of previous guests because I figured that would maybe urge him to do it.

01:09:45.000 And he goes, Loomer, no thanks.

01:09:48.000 And I was like, well, I don't know why you would say that, but why does talking to someone make me not want to do it?

01:09:54.000 And he goes, well, it means that you endorse that guest and she's a loon or something like that.

01:10:00.000 And then I sent it to Laura and she was like, yeah, he's always been an asshole.

01:10:03.000 So I was wondering what you thought.

01:10:05.000 Yeah, I don't know Sebastian Gorka very well.

01:10:07.000 He seems like a pretty cool guy the few times I've hung out or like spoken to him.

01:10:12.000 But I do resent this concept of having a guest means you endorse him.

01:10:17.000 Like I had Richard Spencer on my show and we argued about his ridiculous views.

01:10:22.000 I had David Duke on my show as a joke with a black guest where we talked about white bread. 0.99

01:10:27.000 I had Jared Taylor on my show where he debated the rapper R.A. the Rugged Man.

01:10:32.000 I mean, Richard Spencer was on CNN and ESPN.

01:10:35.000 David Duke was on CNN.

01:10:37.000 You're allowed to have guests.

01:10:40.000 In fact, if you didn't have guests that you disagree with, then your show would just be Howard Stern, which is just him asslicking celebrities for an hour and a half.

01:10:50.000 It's painfully boring.

01:10:51.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

01:10:52.000 Sorry you didn't get Gorka.

01:10:54.000 Got a long way to go, my friend.

01:10:58.000 I'm going to try Ronnie.

01:10:59.000 Ronnie or Tom.

01:11:02.000 10,000 hours, Matt.

01:11:03.000 10,000 hours.

01:11:04.000 You've been doing this for like, what, a few months?

01:11:07.000 718 number.

01:11:08.000 Look at Naradwar the Human Serviette. 0.89

01:11:10.000 Look at how much work he's done.

01:11:12.000 British Columbia, Canada.

01:11:16.000 Thank God.

01:11:17.000 Hey, man.

01:11:19.000 Hey, listen, I just wanted to ask you, you have any opinions on the Landau bolting from Compound Media thing?

01:11:25.000 It's really annoying to me that he quits working with a legend to go work with this guy.

01:11:32.000 I'm not a big, I was never a big fan of Kratos.

01:11:35.000 He always appealed to me like the Morning Zoo type of the webcast, right?

01:11:41.000 So he quits the show that kept him employed, going to quarantine where all comedians have been sidelined, literally the perimeters of entertainment.

01:11:53.000 And he just bolts through an email.

01:11:57.000 And I know you're not a big fan of people working with comedians.

01:12:01.000 And you're so accurate on that.

01:12:04.000 And I'm just, I'm trying to wrap my head around this little worm who bolted on this guy.

01:12:10.000 Well, we talked about this on the show the other day.

01:12:13.000 We talked about it on the show as Anthony's friend, and I don't know Dave that well.

01:12:16.000 I obviously side with Anthony, and it is shitty.

01:12:19.000 And I do think it's weird that Crowder would poach Kumia's sidekick.

01:12:25.000 But on the other hand, from Dave Landau's perspective, you're making X amount of dollars.

01:12:31.000 Say he's making $300 an app.

01:12:32.000 I don't know.

01:12:33.000 And Crowder goes, I'll offer you $600 an app, or maybe $1,000 an app.

01:12:38.000 I mean, Landau's got a young kid.

01:12:41.000 He kind of has to do it.

01:12:43.000 That's business.

01:12:44.000 If someone makes you a better offer, you got to go with it.

01:12:47.000 Is Anthony not moving as well?

01:12:49.000 He's moving to North Carolina or South Carolina soon.

01:12:52.000 Yeah, what does that matter?

01:12:53.000 Well, I mean, because Dave then has to go there or they would do it remotely.

01:12:57.000 So Crowder's in Texas.

01:12:59.000 Yeah, I understand that.

01:13:00.000 But that's kind of like in limbo.

01:13:04.000 But Ryan.

01:13:05.000 So he has to move either way is what you're saying.

01:13:07.000 Yeah.

01:13:07.000 Yeah, yeah, I get it, I get it.

01:13:08.000 So your point's retarded for a change. 0.97

01:13:13.000 Right?

01:13:14.000 Yes.

01:13:14.000 Yeah.

01:13:15.000 We talked about this on the show yesterday.

01:13:17.000 Look it up.

01:13:17.000 Thanks for calling.

01:13:19.000 I mean, that's what happened to me.

01:13:22.000 I was offered 11 times my salary to go to Blaze.

01:13:26.000 I was like, okay.

01:13:27.000 I said to, I actually, you know what I did?

01:13:29.000 I said to Keith, I go, I just had this offer.

01:13:32.000 Let's say it was 10 bucks.

01:13:34.000 You're paying me $2.

01:13:37.000 If you came back with $8, I could say fuck off to the $2.

01:13:41.000 But you need to get within the same universe as this offer.

01:13:45.000 And he's like, can't do it, dude.

01:13:47.000 And I went, I said to him, what would you do in my shoes?

01:13:53.000 I can't remember what he said, but, you know, I would be a bitch if I refused an 11 times offer.

01:14:02.000 But I really wanted to be Anthony's sidekick.

01:14:05.000 I actually offered my services up many times before my Blaze gig.

01:14:10.000 But he didn't want me.

01:14:13.000 I think it would probably be because we're both kind of alphas, so it would be like the Superman and Batman show.

01:14:18.000 And that doesn't really make for it, because we're both competing.

01:14:22.000 You need a Batman and a Robin.

01:14:24.000 Or in our case, a Goliath and a David.

01:14:27.000 Right.

01:14:30.000 Remember the Artie days?

01:14:33.000 Yeah, that's interesting because Artie was kind of a Batman.

01:14:37.000 It was a Superman, Batman with him and Artie.

01:14:39.000 Well, he had a Batman.

01:14:40.000 He was the Batman as far as reputation goes, but he wasn't, I don't, I think he was more of a Robin in the.

01:14:46.000 But I think Artie was such a drunken fuck-up and such a meandering mess that it was clear Anthony was leading the show.

01:14:52.000 Right.

01:14:53.000 So it was like Superman and Batman after being hit by a truck.

01:14:58.000 But if Artie was on his game 100% and had like a large breakfast and no heroin that day, he might be.

01:15:07.000 What's Artie up to these days?

01:15:08.000 I hear he's in his mother's basement doing absolutely nothing.

01:15:11.000 Maybe.

01:15:11.000 Is he doing heroin?

01:15:12.000 And more importantly, does he have a septum?

01:15:15.000 Probably not.

01:15:17.000 Like, I want to take a night course in nose jobs so I can get in there and just add whatever they put up here, a little piece of plastic. 0.54

01:15:25.000 I mean, I could use part of my...

01:15:28.000 I could take the cover off my phone.

01:15:29.000 I could take an L-shape off my phone and just stuff it up there.

01:15:33.000 His fucking nose looks like something out of Disneyland.

01:15:37.000 Look at that.

01:15:38.000 Click on that.

01:15:39.000 Look at that thing. 0.92

01:15:42.000 I mean, fix that.

01:15:44.000 Yeah, I've actually never seen it.

01:15:44.000 Look at that fucking picture.

01:15:46.000 I've never had a nose like that before, oddly enough.

01:15:49.000 He looks like he's at the zoo and he's pushing his face up against the glass to get a better look at the polar bears.

01:15:58.000 Dude, fix that.

01:16:00.000 Please.

01:16:00.000 Did I ever think about Donny Curtis?

01:16:02.000 I'll pay for it.

01:16:04.000 If we did a GoFundMe and said we're sick of looking at this deflated sleeping bag of a nose, we'd raise a million dollars overnight.

01:16:14.000 Fucking Jesus.

01:16:16.000 I don't care if he retires or even dies, but I don't want to see that weird bag of potatoes in the coffin.

01:16:23.000 Yeah, what if just whoever does the coroner or whoever?

01:16:27.000 Yeah, hey, coroners, if you ever get Artie Lang's body, can you put a toothpick in there or something?

01:16:34.000 Put some tissue paper, anything.

01:16:37.000 All right, next call.

01:16:38.000 Max.

01:16:40.000 Or Mac.

01:16:42.000 Sorry, that's my bad click.

01:16:44.000 Mac, you're on the line.

01:16:46.000 Hey, boys.

01:16:47.000 Hey.

01:16:48.000 Hey, so we all know that Gavin has his greatest hit, and I think Ryan might have a potential one that he doesn't want to admit.

01:16:56.000 Uh-oh.

01:16:56.000 My friend died?

01:17:01.000 The only time he's ever told this story was, I think, when it was the audio-only version, and he's never told it since, and he owes it to the new viewers to tell the On Your Feet Soldier story.

01:17:11.000 Great point, caller.

01:17:12.000 Thank you for calling.

01:17:14.000 Okay.

01:17:15.000 I just, you know, I get a lot of comments that say On Your Feet Soldier, and I'm numb to it.

01:17:20.000 I forget.

01:17:21.000 I'm like, I forget to say that.

01:17:22.000 Just tell the fucking story, please.

01:17:23.000 But the other day when I saw it, I was like, what was that from again?

01:17:26.000 Or not, what was that from, but like, why do people keep saying it?

01:17:29.000 And it's because of the cringiest story of my entire life.

01:17:32.000 And my grandfather was drinking.

01:17:34.000 Let me just interject.

01:17:36.000 When a Puerto Rican says their grandfather, think of your father. 0.98

01:17:40.000 Like, the guy's 50.

01:17:41.000 Yeah, he's a young spry man who could just kick ass.

01:17:45.000 Yeah.

01:17:46.000 And so he, yeah, he was drinking.

01:17:48.000 This was years back, but he's been sober for a while now, but he was drunk and he was feeling like a little suicidal.

01:17:55.000 He was talking about suicide, right?

01:17:57.000 And so he, and then my grandmother, she's like, Ryan, Come upstairs.

01:18:01.000 Your grandfather wants to talk to you.

01:18:03.000 He's really in a bad way.

01:18:05.000 And I was like, What's the matter?

01:18:06.000 He's like, He's talking about killing himself.

01:18:08.000 And so I was like, Oh my god.

01:18:09.000 Was there a particular event that had made him sad?

01:18:12.000 No, I think maybe the drinking and the memories and maybe regretting, doing regretful stuff throughout the years.

01:18:21.000 There's a couple things.

01:18:22.000 You know, we've seen him drunk before, and he reflects on bad.

01:18:26.000 I mean, he's really functional for a Vietnam vet.

01:18:29.000 You know, I mean, a lot of Vietnam vets do just fine, but the shit he saw was pretty fucked up. 0.56

01:18:34.000 So he's probably just going through that.

01:18:35.000 Just stuff that I saw was crazy.

01:18:37.000 So he was like, come here, poppy.

01:18:41.000 He's like, man, I don't know.

01:18:42.000 I don't think I can do this anymore or whatever, something like that.

01:18:45.000 How old were you?

01:18:46.000 He was kind of weeping.

01:18:49.000 Maybe like 15 to not 17.

01:18:54.000 15 to like 17.

01:18:55.000 Let's say 16.

01:18:57.000 Okay.

01:18:58.000 That's fair.

01:18:59.000 And so he was like, he was like, I don't know.

01:19:01.000 He was crying.

01:19:02.000 And then I was like, I grabbed his arm and I said, I was like, come on.

01:19:08.000 I was like, get up.

01:19:09.000 On your feet, soldier.

01:19:12.000 Trying to boost his morale.

01:19:13.000 Wait a minute.

01:19:14.000 Don't dilute it.

01:19:14.000 Didn't you stand up at like attention and bark at him?

01:19:17.000 On your feet, soldier?

01:19:20.000 It was somewhere in between what I did and what that was.

01:19:22.000 Yeah, I was like, on your feet, soldier, or something like that.

01:19:25.000 And I actually said corporal, corporal was put in there.

01:19:28.000 So I said his rank.

01:19:30.000 He was a sergeant, but he got demoted for some shenanigans.

01:19:33.000 Him and his buddies went out.

01:19:34.000 And it's just the crazy like a little Asian twink telling a grown Vietnam vent. 1.00

01:19:41.000 He watched his friend's head come off.

01:19:43.000 Right.

01:19:43.000 And you're like, I'm on your feet somewhere.

01:19:45.000 Someone caused another man's head to come off. 0.86

01:19:48.000 And I look like Charlie, too.

01:19:49.000 He probably thinks I'm setting bamboo traps in the hallway.

01:19:52.000 Well, you know, it's good when, like, 10, 20 years later, you remember it, you're lying in bed alone in the dark and you go, yeah.

01:19:59.000 I blank it out like a sexual assault.

01:20:02.000 You know, like, I first.

01:20:04.000 You sexually assaulted yourself with gayness. 1.00

01:20:06.000 That's correct.

01:20:08.000 That's pretty good.

01:20:09.000 On your feet, soldier.

01:20:10.000 On your feet, soldier.

01:20:11.000 And then he was like, and then he went, I can't kill myself.

01:20:14.000 I'm not going to kill myself.

01:20:14.000 I have to kill him.

01:20:15.000 That's embarrassing.

01:20:17.000 I need like a year to go by.

01:20:19.000 So that's my death isn't related to that.

01:20:21.000 I don't want that to be the last thing.

01:20:23.000 I don't want to be remotely associated with that.

01:20:25.000 He was like, Ryan, you did it.

01:20:26.000 What'd you say?

01:20:27.000 Never mind, grandma.

01:20:28.000 I was so cringe that he needed another year of life to separate himself from what I said.

01:20:37.000 You know, Poppy, I've seen some horrors out there, but what you just said.

01:20:40.000 You are a good.

01:20:40.000 You're like my buddy at the gym, Jalapeno, who thinks that he has magic powers and he can go heal people.

01:20:47.000 That's true.

01:20:48.000 So he goes to people who have a bad leg or something.

01:20:51.000 He'll drive like to Tennessee and just like for 700 bucks.

01:20:58.000 Wow.

01:20:59.000 And then go back home.

01:21:00.000 What a good racket.

01:21:00.000 Meanwhile, he walks like someone shot him eight minutes ago.

01:21:08.000 Charity starts at home, buddy.

01:21:09.000 Yeah.

01:21:10.000 You know, magic, I thought, I didn't think I could do magic, but I remember another cringe thing.

01:21:15.000 This is when I was about seven years old.

01:21:16.000 There were like cute girls walking by me in the green window.

01:21:18.000 You're trying to be cringe at seven, dude, but okay, we'll hear you out.

01:21:22.000 Like I wanted to get their attention.

01:21:23.000 They were like over there.

01:21:25.000 So I pretended I was like, there was wind, and I was pretending I could control the wind.

01:21:29.000 So I was going like.

01:21:32.000 Now you're just being gay and you're talking about yourself. 0.97

01:21:34.000 And that's no, you're like, how cute am I?

01:21:37.000 God, you're fucking cute.

01:21:38.000 That's not cringy.

01:21:39.000 No, it's you talking about how cute you were.

01:21:41.000 And we're all supposed to go, what a cutie.

01:21:44.000 Fuck off.

01:21:44.000 I don't think that please.

01:21:45.000 I'm not cute at all.

01:21:48.000 I was so cringe when I was a baby.

01:21:52.000 It's pretty gay, but go ahead. 1.00

01:21:54.000 Scotty.

01:21:57.000 Hey, how's it going, guys?

01:21:59.000 Hey, man.

01:22:02.000 Hey, my call-in screen says something else, but I thought of something better.

01:22:06.000 I'm getting married in about 85 days to my love, and she's amazing.

01:22:12.000 And I was wondering if you had any advice for some young, God-serving young people who are looking to get married.

01:22:22.000 Well, you probably can't afford this if you're just getting married, but I would advise separate bathrooms as much as possible. 0.99

01:22:29.000 Is that possible?

01:22:33.000 I don't think so, but we can make boundaries.

01:22:38.000 Yeah, I mean...

01:22:40.000 I can lock her up and allow her to go to the bathroom once a day. 1.00

01:22:44.000 And at that time, I'll be out of the house.

01:22:48.000 Yeah, and then when you get a house that you can, well, you don't have a house, you have an apartment, I assume.

01:22:54.000 Yeah.

01:22:55.000 So when you get a house, you make sure you get two bathrooms and you have a separate bathroom.

01:22:59.000 But my advice is what I always say on this show, which is you're never done courting.

01:23:06.000 You know, you never want to be seen like picking your ass and smelling it.

01:23:10.000 You want to wear suits.

01:23:12.000 She should wear heels. 1.00

01:23:13.000 Obviously not every day, but sometimes.

01:23:16.000 And, you know, she's not your roommate.

01:23:20.000 She's a woman you're courting. 0.61

01:23:22.000 And here's an analogy I've said a hundred times, but you don't want to show her weakness.

01:23:27.000 You don't want to show her.

01:23:29.000 You tell your buddy, here's the example.

01:23:31.000 You're running down the street with a chocolate cake.

01:23:33.000 You trip and your face falls right into the cake and you're covered in chocolate cake.

01:23:39.000 That's a funny story to tell your friends.

01:23:42.000 You should definitely act it out, show them, explain the cake.

01:23:45.000 They'll be very amused.

01:23:46.000 Do not tell your wife that story.

01:23:49.000 Throw the cake in the garbage, clean your face off, go get a new cake, say that they fucked up and it's not ready yet.

01:23:55.000 Like, don't be vulnerable around her.

01:23:58.000 Billy Joel said, tell her about it, tell her all your crazy dreams, and he was promptly dumped.

01:24:04.000 So don't get into this mind frame where you guys are soulmates and you can shit while she's brushing her teeth.

01:24:10.000 That's the beginning of the end.

01:24:12.000 Always keep a stiff upper lip.

01:24:14.000 If she's freaking out about turbulence on the plane, you hold her hand and you explain that it's just a bus in the sky.

01:24:21.000 And there's more bus accidents than there are plane accidents.

01:24:24.000 So we're actually less safe on a Greyhound bus than we are on this plane.

01:24:27.000 And then you can quietly shit your pants and look out the window going, we're going to fucking die.

01:24:34.000 Thanks for calling.

01:24:35.000 Yeah, that's good.

01:24:37.000 Never give in Jason.

01:24:45.000 Hush, hush.

01:24:47.000 Keep it down now.

01:24:49.000 Voices carry.

01:24:52.000 Can you hear me?

01:24:53.000 Yeah.

01:24:55.000 Yeah, so you guys had a video a couple weeks ago.

01:24:59.000 That's a lie.

01:25:00.000 Context to it.

01:25:03.000 It was off the grid with that Nicole chick and her husband or whatever. 1.00

01:25:08.000 In any case, she went to the high school that I went to.

01:25:12.000 Oh, I saw you wrote into the show.

01:25:17.000 What was that?

01:25:17.000 You wrote into the mailbag.

01:25:20.000 Yeah, yeah, exactly.

01:25:22.000 Yeah, she went to my high school, but I think you asked in the videos, like, how do they make their money or something like that?

01:25:29.000 And she came from a pretty nice family.

01:25:30.000 I think the guy has all the money, but she's doing OnlyFans for like a ton of money. 1.00

01:25:38.000 And that's basically how they get their money, I guess, living up there.

01:25:41.000 So we've got like, I think the count's four porn stars now from my high school.

01:25:46.000 It's pretty wild.

01:25:47.000 We've got a pretty high ratio.

01:25:48.000 But yeah, I just want to put some context to that.

01:25:51.000 And didn't he dump his wife?

01:25:57.000 I'm not sure.

01:25:58.000 He didn't go to our high school.

01:26:00.000 I think he lived in Washington, like Vancouver or something.

01:26:04.000 But all I know is that she has a sister in my grade, and she was at our high school.

01:26:09.000 And we have actually a lot of people that were pretty decent friends with her, and they just stumbled across all this nonsense.

01:26:16.000 She's got like 500K subscribers on YouTube.

01:26:19.000 Oh, my God.

01:26:19.000 What's her name?

01:26:22.000 Her name is Nicole.

01:26:24.000 And I think, I don't know what her last name is.

01:26:28.000 Last name was Wineland when she went to my high school up in Oregon.

01:26:32.000 But yeah, now she's just with that dude up there, and she's cranking out like OnlyFans, Instagram, YouTube, all that stuff. 0.89

01:26:41.000 She's making, I guess, really good money because they're doing crazy shit. 1.00

01:26:44.000 And what's their YouTube called?

01:26:48.000 YouTube is, I think it's just like off the grid with Jake and Nicole.

01:26:54.000 And she's like half naked in like the first video that you find. 0.91

01:26:58.000 All right.

01:26:58.000 Thanks for calling.

01:27:01.000 I remember her being fucking insanely hot. 0.99

01:27:03.000 But if you're on OnlyFans, you're a prostitute. 1.00

01:27:08.000 You're not a sex worker. 0.90

01:27:09.000 There's no such thing as a sex worker. 1.00

01:27:12.000 Those are oxymorons.

01:27:14.000 That's an anoxymoron.

01:27:16.000 That's like saying I'm a shit worker.

01:27:17.000 What do you do?

01:27:18.000 I go poo-poo.

01:27:19.000 Well, if you charge people to see that, then you're a disgusting person who takes a shit.

01:27:24.000 Sex is something we all do.

01:27:26.000 It's a bodily function, and it's very pleasant, especially when you're with the one you love.

01:27:30.000 When you sell that, you're selling the most sacred part of yourself.

01:27:35.000 I'm not talking about men, although it is kind of weird with men.

01:27:37.000 Like Jacob Wall has a very successful Only account, OnlyFans account.

01:27:42.000 It's all faggots, paying him money to see him work out. 1.00

01:27:45.000 And I'm like, he's like, I make tons of money.

01:27:48.000 I go, yeah, but you're a prostitute. 1.00

01:27:49.000 But I don't really have a lot of stigma with that.

01:27:52.000 Whatever.

01:27:52.000 Gays can admire a dude.

01:27:54.000 It's not really as sad as a woman. 0.99

01:27:56.000 A woman has, and I try to explain this to my daughter.

01:27:59.000 Your chastity is like a bank account.

01:28:02.000 It's like a bag of gold coins.

01:28:04.000 And it's given to you at puberty.

01:28:06.000 Oh, you start having your period.

01:28:07.000 Here's a bag of gold coins.

01:28:09.000 They're finite.

01:28:11.000 So if you fuck everything that moves, your bag is empty.

01:28:15.000 And no one wants it anymore.

01:28:17.000 It's like a guy's dick is a key.

01:28:20.000 A woman's pussy is a lock. 1.00

01:28:22.000 If a key could go into every lock and work, it's a pretty cool key.

01:28:26.000 I'd want that key.

01:28:27.000 If a lock accepts every single key it takes, it's a shitty lock.

01:28:32.000 It doesn't exist.

01:28:33.000 So these women throwing away their gold coins, they think, hey, look, I got all this money. 1.00

01:28:38.000 I traded in my gold coins for cash.

01:28:40.000 Yeah, but there's less gold coins in your sal.

01:28:46.000 Oh, she's not that hot. 1.00

01:28:49.000 But up for kindling and firewood.

01:28:51.000 It's all untreated.

01:28:51.000 It's right here.

01:28:53.000 Spruce and cedar.

01:28:54.000 Where's the nude?

01:28:55.000 I thought she's in the first video. 0.85

01:28:56.000 She's nude.

01:28:57.000 Yeah, I've been scrubbing.

01:29:01.000 So in the thumbnail, she's shirtless in every one of them almost, right?

01:29:05.000 You know, she's got her butt cheeks. 1.00

01:29:07.000 Every single one.

01:29:09.000 She's shirtless and showing her butt cheeks. 1.00

01:29:11.000 And then you click on it, and he's talking about firewood.

01:29:13.000 Looking like a bulky David Spade.

01:29:19.000 What a fucking loser he is.

01:29:21.000 Farming your wife out. 0.99

01:29:23.000 If you're not jealous, you're a piece of shit.

01:29:27.000 I remember my wife, when we were dating, they were doing a recreation of that Jimi Hendrix cover where everyone's shirtless.

01:29:34.000 And she goes, all my friends are doing this.

01:29:36.000 This artist is doing a recreation of Jimi Hendrix album cover.

01:29:39.000 Would you be okay with me being part of that?

01:29:42.000 And I was like, no.

01:29:44.000 You're not doing that.

01:29:45.000 Absolutely not.

01:29:47.000 And I think she appreciated it.

01:29:48.000 I like that.

01:29:48.000 Yeah.

01:29:49.000 Yeah.

01:29:50.000 I remember a black girl dumped me once because I wasn't jealous enough.

01:29:54.000 She wanted me to beat her during sex and be like, you looking at another man? 1.00

01:29:59.000 What the fuck, you crazy bitch? 1.00

01:30:01.000 I don't know why I did it in a black accent.

01:30:05.000 But that was absurd levels of jealousy.

01:30:07.000 But a normal level of jealousy is, I don't want you being a prostitute. 1.00

01:30:11.000 For fuck's sakes.

01:30:12.000 Is that the cover?

01:30:13.000 Yeah, Ryan, that's the cover.

01:30:15.000 Well, I don't see any.

01:30:16.000 That's the Jimi Hendrix album with all the hot chicks with their tits out. 1.00

01:30:24.000 By scrolling.

01:30:24.000 And by hot chicks, I meant cobras, and by tits, I meant none.

01:30:30.000 I don't know.

01:30:30.000 I just did a lot of scrolling.

01:30:31.000 I don't see it.

01:30:33.000 Okay.

01:30:35.000 What's the album called?

01:30:37.000 Or tits. 1.00

01:30:38.000 Jimi Hendrix Naked Ladies? 0.99

01:30:41.000 Try?

01:30:43.000 I'm pretty sure it was Jimi Hendrix.

01:30:48.000 Boom, ba-doom, ba-doom-doom.

01:30:50.000 Oh, Electric Ladyland.

01:30:52.000 Yeah.

01:30:54.000 I like how you say that, like, that was the missing link.

01:30:58.000 Well, I got the moderate search, So that probably doesn't help.

01:31:01.000 Why do you have that?

01:31:02.000 Because every time we show nudity, we say not safe for work and it's a big deal.

01:31:05.000 And anytime I went on a picture and there was like nudity around it, you were like, for fuck's sake, there's like a dick right there.

01:31:11.000 Well, take off the filter, please.

01:31:13.000 It's off.

01:31:14.000 Well, the Electric Ladyland is still digitized.

01:31:17.000 That's a good point.

01:31:17.000 I don't know what.

01:31:18.000 Electric Ladyland unsensitive.

01:31:20.000 Detective Shitty strikes again.

01:31:22.000 It's the filter I have.

01:31:23.000 Changes to the filters.

01:31:24.000 Problem persists.

01:31:25.000 Are you on Brave?

01:31:27.000 Whoops.

01:31:29.000 Yeah, Electric Ladyland.

01:31:31.000 Do you have Jimi Hendrix in there still?

01:31:35.000 There we go, I guess.

01:31:38.000 Anyway, they were going to recreate that.

01:31:42.000 Why can't your fucking Google work?

01:31:48.000 And I said, fuck them.

01:31:51.000 I wish them nothing but the best, but it's only my girlfriend. 0.81

01:31:56.000 Although, if you're a young lady and your peak of beauty is not porn, maybe you should pose nude. 0.94

01:32:03.000 Then you'll have that picture forever.

01:32:06.000 Not my girlfriend, not my daughter.

01:32:08.000 Not my sister.

01:32:10.000 But maybe you.

01:32:13.000 Alright, next go.

01:32:18.000 716.

01:32:22.000 Kevin, I was just wondering, what the fuck are you talking about with your satchel and the bag of gold coins?

01:32:28.000 That's a woman's chassity. 1.00

01:32:32.000 What's up, guys?

01:32:33.000 How you doing?

01:32:33.000 Good.

01:32:34.000 How are you?

01:32:36.000 Good, good.

01:32:37.000 I'm reading your book right now, and I was wondering if you can elaborate more on Sally Wu.

01:32:43.000 You have a strangely Lithuanian accent.

01:32:49.000 I do.

01:32:51.000 Is that where you're from?

01:32:52.000 I do.

01:32:53.000 Yeah.

01:32:54.000 No, no, I'm Buffalo.

01:32:56.000 Huh.

01:32:58.000 I thought I heard an Eastern European accent.

01:33:00.000 Yeah, I'm reading your book.

01:33:01.000 I'm reading your book, and I can't stop laughing.

01:33:04.000 I wear a retainer, so maybe that's it.

01:33:06.000 Oh, okay.

01:33:08.000 Aren't you a little old for a retainer?

01:33:12.000 No, I just at night.

01:33:13.000 It's terrible.

01:33:15.000 What?

01:33:16.000 Is that better?

01:33:17.000 How's that?

01:33:18.000 Is that better?

01:33:19.000 A little bit, yeah.

01:33:20.000 Still sound retarded. 1.00

01:33:22.000 I was reading your book, and I was laughing my ass off at your Sally Wu stories, and I was wondering if you can elaborate.

01:33:28.000 Well, I had to change all the names because for legal purposes.

01:33:33.000 So which one was Sally Wu?

01:33:35.000 Was she the one who did like naked newscasting?

01:33:39.000 What was her job?

01:33:40.000 No, she was the one that you had Asian gangbang with in 2000 and then 2003. 1.00

01:33:46.000 The one with the Asian chick with a fat ass. 1.00

01:33:50.000 Oh, the one I almost married.

01:33:54.000 Yeah, I met the Asian Three Something, 2003. 1.00

01:34:00.000 That's where I'm at right now.

01:34:01.000 Yeah, she was Pilipina.

01:34:04.000 Oh, if she had a big ass, I think I know who it was. 1.00

01:34:09.000 Yeah, I often wonder what life would have been like if I had married her because she was just so fucking horny. 1.00

01:34:14.000 But I think you're remembering your early 20s when you think of girls that you dated back then, and you're assuming that their libido would continue into your 50s, which is not necessarily true.

01:34:26.000 But yeah, she was amazing, man.

01:34:29.000 What a smokeshot.

01:34:33.000 All right, guys.

01:34:33.000 Thank you.

01:34:34.000 All right.

01:34:34.000 Thanks for calling.

01:34:35.000 I mean, what am I going to say without revealing her identity?

01:34:42.000 Matt.

01:34:46.000 I think the one he's talking about directed the latest Rita Orr video.

01:34:50.000 If I can drop that bomb.

01:34:52.000 No, don't look it up.

01:34:53.000 How's it going, dude?

01:34:56.000 Hi, what's up?

01:34:57.000 I was wondering what you thought about the Uyghur situation in China.

01:35:02.000 And there's a good Vice documentary about it with this hot chick, Isabelle Young. 1.00

01:35:07.000 She's like a perfect seven, cover of Seven magazine. 0.70

01:35:12.000 Yeah, I don't really care about the Uyghurs. 1.00

01:35:14.000 When I think about how many Christians are killed a day, I think it's 12 in the world.

01:35:20.000 And I think of what a fucking disgusting communist shithole China is and the way, you know, Venezuelans and Cubans live in socialist shitholes.

01:35:29.000 I just, I'm sorry.

01:35:30.000 I don't care.

01:35:33.000 I think it's wrong the way they treat them, but I don't feel anything.

01:35:39.000 Do you?

01:35:40.000 Yeah, I just think it's crazy how well the Chinese government can cover it up in America. 0.99

01:35:48.000 It could never happen.

01:35:49.000 I mean, I think it's because of the people in China.

01:35:52.000 Yeah, they all live in perpetual fear.

01:35:56.000 It's a disgusting shithole.

01:35:57.000 But, you know, that's the life of everyone in China.

01:36:01.000 When I was there, they talked about police brutality.

01:36:04.000 A journalist talked about police brutality.

01:36:05.000 The police beat him to death.

01:36:07.000 Like, you can't be Christian there. 0.99

01:36:08.000 There's no churches there.

01:36:09.000 It's illegal to be religious of any religion. 1.00

01:36:12.000 So, yes, there's concentration camps for Muslims where they treat them like slaves, but that's life in a communist country. 0.54

01:36:20.000 It's a disgusting shithole top to bottom.

01:36:23.000 And I kind of almost resent this disproportional empathy for these Muslims because I'll have some empathy left over after I deal with the war on Christianity in the Middle East and northern Iraq and Africa and all over the fucking place.

01:36:38.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

01:36:39.000 But yeah, I don't care.

01:36:42.000 I just don't care.

01:36:45.000 You can't get mad at me.

01:36:46.000 Those are my feelings.

01:36:47.000 Feelings matter.

01:36:49.000 I always say to my daughter, your feelings matter.

01:36:51.000 If you're mad at me, you're not wrong.

01:36:54.000 That anger comes from somewhere.

01:36:56.000 It didn't manifest itself out of thin air.

01:36:59.000 If you're scared, if you're walking, and I always say, because she likes to go to the city a lot, and I go, trust your instincts.

01:37:06.000 If you just feel bad on a certain block at a certain time, then that badness is there for a reason.

01:37:13.000 It's 200,000 years of evolution.

01:37:15.000 And something, your pheromones, your sensors, your synapses are sending you a message.

01:37:21.000 Get the fuck out of there.

01:37:23.000 Who was the hot chick he was talking about? 0.94

01:37:26.000 A half-breed. 0.97

01:37:27.000 Some bitch. 1.00

01:37:28.000 Didn't you just pull her up? 1.00

01:37:29.000 Yeah, Isobel.

01:37:31.000 What, you forgot?

01:37:32.000 Young vice.

01:37:34.000 I showed her, but she's, I mean, it's a droid.

01:37:38.000 Who cares?

01:37:39.000 You're not into these?

01:37:40.000 I don't know what I'm even looking at.

01:37:42.000 I don't.

01:37:43.000 So you as a half-Asian hate half Asians.

01:37:46.000 Half-Asians? 0.88

01:37:47.000 I don't see any.

01:37:48.000 Like, I see there's features.

01:37:50.000 That's a perfectly good neighbor or passerby or like a.

01:37:53.000 Yeah.

01:37:55.000 There's nothing attractive about her.

01:37:56.000 There's nothing ugly about her either.

01:37:58.000 But certainly nothing ugly.

01:38:00.000 She said she's on the cover of 7 magazine.

01:38:02.000 She's cute there. 0.99

01:38:03.000 I think she's on the cover of 6.7 magazine.

01:38:08.000 But we're only 0.3 off.

01:38:10.000 Like, that's a negative.

01:38:12.000 I definitely could not have stayed advice.

01:38:14.000 Documentaries about other places in the world couldn't possibly interest me less.

01:38:23.000 I don't fucking care about skateboarders in Bangladesh. 1.00

01:38:28.000 Wish them nothing but the best.

01:38:30.000 Don't care.

01:38:32.000 Corey.

01:38:36.000 Who's next?

01:38:37.000 Hello.

01:38:38.000 Yellow.

01:38:40.000 You guys hear me?

01:38:41.000 No, not at all.

01:38:42.000 Oh, hey, Gavin.

01:38:44.000 Hey, man.

01:38:45.000 I like you more than a friend.

01:38:46.000 Oh, shit.

01:38:47.000 I like Ryan as just a friend.

01:38:50.000 Okay, thank you.

01:38:52.000 Boundaries established.

01:38:54.000 Yes, sir.

01:38:55.000 Assuming you're both in your prime.

01:38:58.000 Nope.

01:38:58.000 You versus your dad, who's getting their ass knocked out.

01:39:02.000 I think you've written into the show with this question.

01:39:07.000 Yes, but I also called into the show with it now.

01:39:11.000 And I also think we answered this.

01:39:13.000 Me and my prime, I'm not sure I could take the guy now.

01:39:19.000 I always say with fighting, the number of fights you've been in is more relevant than anything else.

01:39:25.000 It's all about practice makes perfect.

01:39:27.000 My dad had to fight every day of his adolescence and early adulthood, maybe even childhood, because he had scholarships and he had a student uniform, which is unthinkable in his neighborhood.

01:39:40.000 I've probably been in like 10 fights at the most.

01:39:43.000 I'm not counting sparring because that doesn't really count.

01:39:45.000 So I think I might be able to beat him up now and that he's 76 and I'm 50, but it would be a good fight and it would last a long time.

01:39:54.000 But as far as the prime, I would just be knocked out instantly.

01:39:58.000 He would headbutt me.

01:39:59.000 My nose would explode.

01:40:03.000 I'd ask Ryan, but he doesn't have a bad.

01:40:06.000 This is him and his, I don't know, prime, but my mom took this picture.

01:40:09.000 All right, thanks for calling.

01:40:11.000 And he might have, I don't know, don't Japs know like Kung Fu or something? 1.00

01:40:14.000 They know karate.

01:40:16.000 I feel like that.

01:40:17.000 He used to be like in a biker gang, too, so he probably would have.

01:40:20.000 I'm going to go with something wrong with that for 800.

01:40:23.000 He was in a biker gang? 0.90

01:40:24.000 Yeah.

01:40:25.000 When I was young, I used to want to ride Motorcycle.

01:40:28.000 In Japan?

01:40:28.000 Japan, yeah.

01:40:30.000 Japan had Hell's Angels.

01:40:31.000 Oh, yeah?

01:40:32.000 Yeah.

01:40:33.000 Huh.

01:40:34.000 I think they were established.

01:40:35.000 Let's see.

01:40:35.000 It was Chuck Zito that was down there establishing it.

01:40:40.000 So that would probably be late 80s, early 90s.

01:40:44.000 That could have been him.

01:40:45.000 They don't look so tough.

01:40:48.000 They'll probably kill you, though.

01:40:51.000 Danger people.

01:40:54.000 Hell's Angels forever.

01:40:56.000 Wait, that's Japan?

01:40:58.000 There's a lot of white dudes in it.

01:41:01.000 That'd be a cool jacket to have.

01:41:03.000 Hell's Angels Japan.

01:41:05.000 Hell's Angels Japan.

01:41:06.000 If you don't know what you're doing in life, go to Japan and join the Hell's Angels. 1.00

01:41:13.000 Because that'll be basically the coolest jacket you could possibly have.

01:41:18.000 Hell's Angels Tokyo.

01:41:20.000 Yeah, imagine you had a Hell's Angels all broken in.

01:41:24.000 Indonesia, I mean, that's a cooler jacket, but a broken in Hell's Angels Tokyo jacket.

01:41:32.000 And it's not broken in because you dragged it behind a truck.

01:41:35.000 It's broken in because you were in the Japanese Hell's Angels for 13 years.

01:41:44.000 Hell's Angels a soul.

01:41:47.000 Wow, that would be cool.

01:41:49.000 There's a Thailand chapter.

01:41:51.000 Eh, Thailand's too hot.

01:41:53.000 You gotta wear shorts.

01:41:56.000 What was that violent gang documentary?

01:41:58.000 Hell's Angels and Mongols. 0.89

01:42:02.000 Mongols are bad news, dude. 1.00

01:42:04.000 Mongoloid? 0.96

01:42:05.000 Don't say anything bad about the Mongols or they'll blow up the studio. 1.00

01:42:08.000 No, that's about Asians. 0.83

01:42:10.000 All right, next call.

01:42:15.000 Johanna.

01:42:20.000 It's Johannes.

01:42:21.000 You got this one wrong last time I called in, too.

01:42:23.000 Oh, hold on.

01:42:24.000 Let me try to care.

01:42:27.000 Thanks, Gavin.

01:42:28.000 How are you doing?

01:42:28.000 I actually wanted to start off the call by saying, if not said often enough, thank you for what you do.

01:42:33.000 You have a great product.

01:42:34.000 I'd never miss an episode.

01:42:35.000 I've been a subscriber for a year now, and it's awesome.

01:42:38.000 Oh, great.

01:42:39.000 Good to hear, man.

01:42:40.000 That's the first thing.

01:42:41.000 Yeah.

01:42:43.000 Actually, I wanted to call for a long time about this topic.

01:42:45.000 It's about your Canadian accent.

01:42:48.000 And I don't even know where to start, but last night's episode, well, I'll say one of the callers before, he noticed that it's actually really pronounced on the phone.

01:42:58.000 And it's true. 0.56

01:42:58.000 Now when I'm talking on the telephone, it is stronger. 0.56

01:43:01.000 What are you talking about?

01:43:02.000 It's one of the most endearing things.

01:43:04.000 What's that?

01:43:05.000 I don't understand what you're talking about.

01:43:10.000 See, and that's the other thing.

01:43:11.000 That's the reason why I love your shows because you're fucking funny.

01:43:14.000 But anyways, and I'm obviously not the only one thinking about this because sometimes when you say the word process, you say it the American way, you know, process.

01:43:25.000 And then last night when you're doing the green screen, you said process.

01:43:28.000 And the reason I bring this up is sometimes I catch you and you like change it mid-O.

01:43:33.000 You go kind of process process.

01:43:36.000 Maybe I'm boring most of the colors to death, but this is the stuff that fascinates me.

01:43:40.000 Did you, because every other aspect of your accent is spot on Canadian.

01:43:44.000 That's probably because when you moved there, you were like seven or whatever when you left England.

01:43:49.000 Yep, five.

01:43:50.000 And I think you said you did that so they don't beat the shit out of you.

01:43:53.000 Yeah, go ahead.

01:43:53.000 Sorry.

01:43:54.000 Yeah, yeah, I was five.

01:43:56.000 I try to, I just, I say about, I think I say about in an American way, but I say us and process, centrifugal, aluminium, Chesterfield, serviette, pasta.

01:44:10.000 My sons, my kids always make fun of me for saying pasta wrong, but I don't know.

01:44:15.000 I don't find it that interesting.

01:44:17.000 Next caller, thanks for calling.

01:44:20.000 Yeah, I've lived in different countries.

01:44:22.000 I say us instead of us.

01:44:24.000 The only time I try to do Americanisms is to keep the ball rolling so people don't get hung up on it.

01:44:31.000 And they go, they don't listen to what I'm saying because I said us or buried.

01:44:35.000 I try to say buried.

01:44:37.000 It was buried alive.

01:44:38.000 Even though Canadian is closer to the English language, it's pasta.

01:44:43.000 It's A's. 0.98

01:44:45.000 It's NASA.

01:44:46.000 It's A's. 0.98

01:44:47.000 It's buried.

01:44:47.000 It's a U. How do you say this word?

01:44:51.000 Experiment.

01:44:52.000 That's how I say it too.

01:44:53.000 You know some people out there say experiment?

01:44:57.000 That's stupid.

01:44:58.000 They do.

01:44:58.000 That sounds like experimental.

01:45:00.000 It sounds like a breath mint.

01:45:02.000 Yeah, I know.

01:45:03.000 And I was double-teamed.

01:45:05.000 Two people were like, dude, you're saying it wrong.

01:45:07.000 Wait, someone fucked you up the ass and stuffed their dick in your mouth because you pronounced a word?

01:45:11.000 Yeah, and it was so boring that we started speaking about the word experiment.

01:45:14.000 I was like, this has been a fun experiment.

01:45:16.000 They're like, hold on a second.

01:45:17.000 And while they were still in me, they corrected me.

01:45:20.000 Hey, J dinosaurs, somebody says.

01:45:24.000 505.

01:45:25.000 Hey, what's up, guys?

01:45:26.000 How you doing?

01:45:26.000 Good.

01:45:27.000 How are you?

01:45:28.000 Hello.

01:45:29.000 Hello.

01:45:29.000 Good, thanks.

01:45:30.000 Hey, this call is for Ryan, not Gavin.

01:45:35.000 Ryan, I sent you an email the other day, and Gavin probably filtered it out because it was about dinosaurs.

01:45:42.000 Dinos?

01:45:43.000 Gotcha.

01:45:44.000 He probably automatically deletes all those.

01:45:47.000 But I want you to check out Young Earth Creation.

01:45:51.000 So basically, it's dinosaurs are real.

01:45:56.000 But the timeline's all messed up.

01:45:57.000 Remember, dinosaur is...

01:45:59.000 Yeah.

01:45:59.000 No, I've been looking.

01:46:01.000 Yeah, the daddy.

01:46:01.000 The timeline's all.

01:46:02.000 Honestly, we've been getting a huge dump of all dinosaur stuff.

01:46:06.000 I think everybody's had enough of hearing about this.

01:46:08.000 It's all YouTube, too.

01:46:09.000 It's never books.

01:46:10.000 It's always YouTube.

01:46:11.000 Yeah.

01:46:11.000 No, there's some literature and stuff, but like, you know, have you been reading a lot of the literature, right?

01:46:18.000 I've never been a much more literature guy.

01:46:20.000 I've been talking about with a YouTube video about how a dog turned into a whale.

01:46:25.000 Yeah.

01:46:26.000 Yeah.

01:46:27.000 Anyways, okay.

01:46:28.000 That's not where I got it from, though.

01:46:29.000 I didn't get it from the YouTube video.

01:46:32.000 That was just the example, the illustration that he managed to dig up while I was discussing this phenomenon.

01:46:38.000 Fair?

01:46:39.000 Well, it's one thing to consider, though.

01:46:41.000 It's like, I guess just consider how much weight you place into something based on its production value.

01:46:49.000 Like, if there's a really super impressive, well-done dog-to-whale video.

01:46:54.000 I got the dog-to-whale video from a museum in Scotland.

01:47:00.000 And yeah, the production was pretty good.

01:47:04.000 He got it from a museum in Scotland and stuff like that.

01:47:06.000 But hey, I appreciate you bringing that up, and I'll check it out.

01:47:10.000 But yeah, everybody's sick of the dinosaurs.

01:47:11.000 I am too.

01:47:12.000 Like, I actually don't want to get to the...

01:47:13.000 You're already over it.

01:47:14.000 That's how lazy you are.

01:47:15.000 That was my whole point, is that you were just like, I'm going to look at some videos.

01:47:19.000 They don't exist.

01:47:20.000 And then four days later, you're like, I'm done with that.

01:47:23.000 Meanwhile, paleontologists spend 40 years trying to get just an edge on the subject.

01:47:30.000 I'm not saying I'm done with it, but the initial burst of like, wow, that's I wonder.

01:47:35.000 It's just an I wonder.

01:47:36.000 I got a lot of shit, by the way, in the mail for throwing that miraculous Mary thing, which I believe you called a magic Mary.

01:47:42.000 Yeah, your Christianity as well as mine, we could use some work.

01:47:45.000 Where people are taking it really seriously.

01:47:48.000 Like, if you're going to send me a present, look at the present that guy sent me.

01:47:51.000 Yeah, that's fancy from...

01:47:52.000 So it should be gold.

01:47:54.000 Okay, but it's not about vanity.

01:47:56.000 If you send me a stupid little trinket, it's just dumb.

01:47:59.000 You got that from a vending machine?

01:48:00.000 Well, it's not the thing.

01:48:02.000 It's the thought.

01:48:02.000 Yeah, whatever.

01:48:03.000 I got my own thoughts.

01:48:06.000 I have a very high bar for presents.

01:48:08.000 Look at these.

01:48:11.000 These are $322 shoes.

01:48:13.000 If you're going to give me a Virgin Mary, it has to be gold.

01:48:17.000 That sounds like a rapper would say, not a Christian, perhaps. 0.85

01:48:21.000 Sorry.

01:48:21.000 I'm at a certain level.

01:48:24.000 I'm the gold tier.

01:48:25.000 Yeah, look.

01:48:26.000 This is the quality of my presents.

01:48:29.000 There's something about a humble trinket, though, that's kind of cool.

01:48:32.000 No, there's not.

01:48:33.000 I don't want a plastic fucking pope.

01:48:35.000 What if it's made from metal from Jerusalem?

01:48:39.000 Sure, that's cool.

01:48:40.000 I have one of those.

01:48:41.000 You know what?

01:48:42.000 I have a little pot that was made in Jerusalem that I got when I was in Israel.

01:48:47.000 Some billionaire gave it to me, and it's like the same thing that Jesus poured water from.

01:48:52.000 It's a duplicate, obviously.

01:48:54.000 But that's cool.

01:48:56.000 I don't need trinkets.

01:48:58.000 I don't care how precious they are.

01:49:02.000 I love Israel.

01:49:03.000 I'm not a Catholic, so I wear it. 1.00

01:49:05.000 I'm not a heat fan.

01:49:06.000 So go there when it's freezing cold.

01:49:09.000 Chilly.

01:49:11.000 But it's cool.

01:49:13.000 Lucas.

01:49:16.000 Hey, Gavin.

01:49:18.000 Thanks for calling.

01:49:18.000 I appreciate it.

01:49:20.000 Glad you could take my call.

01:49:21.000 I'm going to talk about South Africa.

01:49:23.000 Okay.

01:49:24.000 South Africa.

01:49:25.000 Did I say Africa?

01:49:26.000 South Africa.

01:49:27.000 So basically, you're always, every other day, you're ranting about South Africa, about how, you know, shoot the boar, kill the boar, and how they're like skinning white people alive in front of their children and all that shit.

01:49:40.000 But I just kept thinking, man, you know, you see all this anti-white shit on the media, on TV, how everything's white people's fault.

01:49:48.000 You know, whitey's the worst, whitey's the devil. 1.00

01:49:50.000 And we're shrinking in population size, just like in South Africa, we're becoming more and more of a minority.

01:49:58.000 Do you think that's a possibility that that is going to happen here in America eventually?

01:50:03.000 Finally, an intelligent call.

01:50:06.000 I never thought about this.

01:50:08.000 Like, everyone talks about how white people are scared of white genocide and they're scared of becoming a minority.

01:50:13.000 And when they first started saying this, the first time I heard about it was from them.

01:50:18.000 And I thought, no, I'm not concerned about that.

01:50:21.000 I am kind of concerned about black, white, and Hispanic all being 33% because blacks will vote for the black guy, Hispanics will vote for the Hispanic guy, whites will vote for the white guy, and we'll become three separate countries in a way. 0.96

01:50:34.000 So that was a concern.

01:50:36.000 But I have to admit, since then, and I'm going back now not very far, like in the past six months, I've been looking at South Africa and the similarities between immediately post-apartheid South Africa and where they are today.

01:50:53.000 And I see us drifting in the same direction.

01:50:56.000 There is unbridled animosity towards whites in this country.

01:51:01.000 And it comes from whites, too.

01:51:03.000 Like we just had, what's his name, John Brennan, saying every day he's more and more ashamed of being white.

01:51:10.000 We had Bill Burr do a Patrice O'Neill documentary where he cut out Anthony Cumey, Patrice's best friend, because Bill Burr's black wife said Anthony's racist.

01:51:21.000 There's all this deep-seated resentment.

01:51:24.000 We have Jamal Brown, whatever his name is, the representative for Westchester County where my house is, saying that standardized testing is racist.

01:51:36.000 You know what you need to get a high school, to get a, sorry, a secondary, what do you call it when you get a high school diploma and you're not in high school, like an adult education?

01:51:44.000 GED.

01:51:45.000 You know what you need to get a GED in South Africa now?

01:51:48.000 A pulse?

01:51:49.000 Zero.

01:51:50.000 A zero is a pass.

01:51:52.000 Okay, well, it doesn't exist anymore.

01:51:55.000 So, yeah, I am concerned about that.

01:51:58.000 I'm getting more and more concerned.

01:52:00.000 It's a new feeling.

01:52:01.000 I'm totally foreign to it, but I feel like minorities, whatever, I think black Americans want revenge. 1.00

01:52:11.000 Yeah.

01:52:13.000 And we saw this with Indians. 1.00

01:52:14.000 Like, remember that girl, Lexi Page? 0.96

01:52:19.000 Lexi Page.

01:52:20.000 So she was removed from her family.

01:52:22.000 She's like 1.8% Native American. 0.88

01:52:25.000 And they have a Native American reunification program where you're returning Indians back to their families.

01:52:31.000 They found a family that's like 1% more Indian than hers.

01:52:36.000 So they took her from this fucking white family. 1.00

01:52:39.000 I can't look at her.

01:52:40.000 I'll start crying.

01:52:41.000 And they brought her to a family that's 1% more Indian under the auspices of reuniting Indians.

01:52:46.000 It's obviously a hole in the plot.

01:52:48.000 It doesn't make any sense.

01:52:50.000 But the tribe in that area was contacted by their lawyer.

01:52:53.000 And they said, we need you to speak out.

01:52:55.000 And they said, no.

01:52:56.000 And I could tell when this tribe said no, they knew it was unjust, but they were like, you try it.

01:53:03.000 You separated our families.

01:53:04.000 Now we're separating yours, motherfucker. 0.96

01:53:06.000 And it was just Lexi Page, the story of Lexi Page and the lack of Indians speaking out about it.

01:53:12.000 It's just no other word for it but revenge.

01:53:15.000 And we're seeing what happens with these fat chicks and everyone else. 1.00

01:53:18.000 We're living under the revenge of the hurt right now.

01:53:21.000 So I don't think we're far away from revenge of everyone else.

01:53:25.000 And I think we should take heed and look at South Africa because I think a lot of people seem to hate white people in this country.

01:53:33.000 And they're not satisfied with some apologies.

01:53:37.000 I think a lot of them want blood.

01:53:43.000 Thanks for calling.

01:53:46.000 Yeah, that black mother who killed her. 1.00

01:53:49.000 And there's no media attention to it either.

01:53:51.000 So it could happen and nobody would care.

01:53:54.000 And that's the way it was in South Africa.

01:53:56.000 When these farm murders started, they were ignored by the press.

01:54:00.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

01:54:01.000 We should do a whole South Africa special.

01:54:04.000 Because you sound paranoid and racist.

01:54:08.000 And it's considered crazy to say that we could ever have what South Africa has.

01:54:12.000 Why not?

01:54:13.000 Doesn't sound crazy to anybody that matters.

01:54:15.000 How no?

01:54:16.000 How no?

01:54:18.000 What about that guy, Willem, from South Africa?

01:54:20.000 South Africa.

01:54:21.000 Willem forgot his name.

01:54:23.000 People don't get the boars.

01:54:24.000 They're super square.

01:54:25.000 Like, Willem has probably never kissed a girl.

01:54:28.000 He likes the girl he's working with now, but she is...

01:54:32.000 I don't know why my accent sucks.

01:54:34.000 But they're not ready.

01:54:37.000 They're not ready for making kisses.

01:54:39.000 What was the thing from that South African show that they kept saying, like, how dare you or something?

01:54:45.000 But it was like...

01:54:47.000 Remember, it was like that fishing show from South Africa.

01:54:49.000 That's kind of the problem with me talking to these people is they're so Christian. 1.00

01:54:52.000 And I'll be talking to them.

01:54:54.000 I'll be like, a lot of these fuckers, and I'll go, please do not use that word when you're talking to me.

01:54:58.000 What gives them the right?

01:54:59.000 What gives you the rat?

01:55:01.000 Yeah.

01:55:02.000 Oh, that below deck.

01:55:04.000 Yeah.

01:55:05.000 They say right as rat.

01:55:07.000 What gives you the rat?

01:55:09.000 Okay, let's take some more calls.

01:55:10.000 We're running out of time here.

01:55:11.000 I thought this was going to be a one-hour show.

01:55:13.000 Josh.

01:55:17.000 Hey.

01:55:18.000 Hey.

01:55:20.000 Hey, I think you should rethink New Hampshire.

01:55:23.000 It's nothing like Vermont.

01:55:26.000 It's like Vermont's New Hampshire's gay brother. 0.98

01:55:30.000 Okay.

01:55:32.000 People in Vermont seem to be real dicks.

01:55:36.000 Yeah, there's a sugar tax.

01:55:39.000 I went to a wedding there like two years ago.

01:55:41.000 It was worse.

01:55:44.000 Would you ever think about getting your kids into wrestling?

01:55:47.000 Maybe.

01:55:49.000 I mean, my eldest boy's baseball or nothing.

01:55:53.000 And my youngest doesn't.

01:55:54.000 I'm going to start him on baseball this season.

01:55:57.000 But I take him to boxing.

01:55:58.000 He's good at it, but he doesn't have any passion for it.

01:56:01.000 If they had any passion for any kind of combat sports, I would pursue it, but I don't think it's up their alley.

01:56:09.000 Well, thanks for everything.

01:56:11.000 Their car show is awesome.

01:56:13.000 Thanks, buddy.

01:56:14.000 Thanks for calling.

01:56:15.000 This is from Witt and Andy.

01:56:17.000 They're Catholics.

01:56:20.000 And they have a little Catholic zine that you can throw.

01:56:24.000 How to be a Man, a Religious Riot, a Bonfire of the Vanities.

01:56:27.000 Wow, this is a quality zine.

01:56:28.000 Zines are fucking cool.

01:56:30.000 Hollowed wants to make a zine also.

01:56:33.000 Do's and don'ts.

01:56:34.000 Would you write for a...

01:56:35.000 Sure, I'd write for a zine.

01:56:37.000 I talked to Milo about doing a zine and putting out a cassette.

01:56:40.000 That'd be huge.

01:56:40.000 And then we kind of just forgot about it.

01:56:42.000 No, you got to do it.

01:56:43.000 That's good.

01:56:43.000 Physical content from censored.tv, that's going to be...

01:56:46.000 That's big.

01:56:46.000 That's cool.

01:56:47.000 This is a quality zine.

01:56:48.000 Usually zines don't get the concept of zines, and the layout sucks.

01:56:52.000 This is exactly what a zine should look like.

01:56:55.000 It looks really fun.

01:56:56.000 Looks really great.

01:56:57.000 They have a podcast.

01:56:57.000 It's called Gold Pilled.

01:57:00.000 They're very Christian.

01:57:01.000 You know, they're Catholic.

01:57:02.000 Remember that?

01:57:03.000 Oh, these guys just sent us that sign.

01:57:04.000 Yeah.

01:57:05.000 We believe in God the Father Almighty, creator of heaven and earth, and in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate.

01:57:14.000 And believe me, I know what it's like to suffer under Pontius Pilate.

01:57:19.000 Believe me.

01:57:20.000 You can't sneeze.

01:57:23.000 Can't do nothing.

01:57:24.000 Nobody knows rib pain like me.

01:57:27.000 Believe me.

01:57:28.000 Maybe one guy.

01:57:30.000 Only guy whose ribs hurt more than mine is the king of the Jews, Jesus H-Crest. 0.94

01:57:36.000 Lord of all lords, Alpha Man.

01:57:38.000 God loved him so much.

01:57:39.000 Why didn't he give him a middle name?

01:57:42.000 H. What does H stand for?

01:57:44.000 Is that like a Sebastian Manascalco bit?

01:57:47.000 If we loved him so much, why not give him a middle name?

01:57:51.000 They don't have him on that app.

01:57:53.000 Like, are you kidding?

01:57:55.000 Come on.

01:57:56.000 I think what the app does is it just goes, most popular people in America.

01:58:00.000 How is Bill Byrne not Sebastian Manascalco?

01:58:03.000 I mean, he's up there.

01:58:04.000 No, no, no, dude.

01:58:06.000 If you look up, like, the most watched views videos on YouTube, it's Justin Bieber and some K-pop band.

01:58:13.000 So when you look up most popular, it doesn't give you most impressionable.

01:58:18.000 It's like TikTokers and dickheads. 1.00

01:58:21.000 It's not going to be Jake Taffer.

01:58:23.000 John Taffer.

01:58:24.000 Shut it down.

01:58:25.000 Shut it down.

01:58:26.000 Ryan Budweiser.

01:58:31.000 This is 301 is your number.

01:58:35.000 If you don't answer, I'm going to say the whole diagnosis.

01:58:37.000 Hello?

01:58:37.000 Just kidding.

01:58:38.000 Hello?

01:58:40.000 Yes, hello?

01:58:41.000 Hello, my baby.

01:58:41.000 Hello.

01:58:42.000 You're the last caller.

01:58:43.000 Hello?

01:58:44.000 Hello?

01:58:45.000 Hello?

01:58:45.000 Are you there?

01:58:46.000 Hello?

01:58:48.000 I just want an Indian Joker face. 0.99

01:58:50.000 That's all I want.

01:58:51.000 Yeah.

01:58:52.000 All right.

01:58:52.000 That's a great way to end the show.

01:58:54.000 Thanks for calling.

01:58:55.000 Ryan, cue the music.

01:58:57.000 Okay.

01:58:59.000 It's been a while.

01:59:01.000 It's been a while.

01:59:02.000 You're injured.

01:59:32.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - March 04, 2021

GOML LIVE #88 - HELLO CALLER

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