Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S02E130 - NO PAIN NO ROGAIN [2020-02-26 - S02E130 - NO PAIN NO ROGAIN]

00:00:40.000 Isn't it weird that we listened to the village people talk about fucking each other and danced around discos?

00:00:47.000 Is that what they were talking about?

00:00:49.000 Yeah.

00:00:50.000 Macho Man.

00:00:52.000 I want a 69, another big muscular man in a big upside-down man sandwich.

00:00:58.000 We were talking about.

00:00:58.000 That's off topic.

00:00:59.000 Sandwich.

00:01:03.000 You know, I used to, I had a tape with YMCA.

00:01:07.000 Okay.

00:01:08.000 I had a tape with YMCA as like a seven-year-old.

00:01:11.000 And I remember taking a walk listening to YMCA and loving it.

00:01:14.000 You know why they love the YMCA?

00:01:14.000 Yeah.

00:01:15.000 Why?

00:01:16.000 Because you get to go there and fuck young men. 0.92

00:01:18.000 Oh, my God.

00:01:19.000 I thought you worked out and did sports.

00:01:19.000 I didn't know that.

00:01:22.000 Yeah, you do that too.

00:01:24.000 You go in there, you get in shape, and then you have a good, good old-fashioned blue job at the end of the sesh.

00:01:31.000 A reaming.

00:01:36.000 Right.

00:01:37.000 Hey, can you guys fuck over there, please?

00:01:39.000 This is disgusting.

00:01:42.000 God.

00:01:44.000 I want to talk about gays later on.

00:01:46.000 But we played Macho Man because, and I know this is old news, but we're just, I'm recovering from my Mets vacation.

00:01:58.000 He was in India, and they played that song.

00:02:02.000 Hell of a juxtaposition from Trudeau's visit.

00:02:05.000 Justin Trudeau goes there and tries to kiss their ass and dresses up.

00:02:09.000 He loves dressing up, including Blackface. 1.00

00:02:13.000 But what is that?

00:02:15.000 So that's the stadium where he was at?

00:02:16.000 Massive.

00:02:18.000 It's the thing about India, though. 0.94

00:02:20.000 It's just like people are ants there.

00:02:22.000 Yeah.

00:02:24.000 If 700,000 people show up to something, it might be like Slash from Guns N' Roses was going to play a kazoo for two minutes.

00:02:33.000 That wouldn't remotely surprise me.

00:02:35.000 I just go, oh, go back to that meme that I was just talking about.

00:02:41.000 Oh, why was this?

00:02:42.000 This image has not come up.

00:02:43.000 No, just play it in there.

00:02:46.000 See, that's what's happening on my computer.

00:02:47.000 I double-click things and they don't.

00:02:49.000 Oh, that's the actual image itself.

00:02:51.000 Yeah, Justin Trudeau snubbed by Indian PM as he lands in New Delhi.

00:02:51.000 Okay.

00:02:55.000 Look at him.

00:02:56.000 Hello, we are here to do your party time.

00:02:59.000 We love India.

00:03:00.000 Look, I got the outfits.

00:03:02.000 They got the outfits in advance, you'll notice.

00:03:05.000 They're getting off the plane.

00:03:06.000 So they must have had them FedExed to Canada, then on the plane.

00:03:11.000 Okay, everyone, we're landing in one hour.

00:03:14.000 Guys, let's get our costumes on.

00:03:16.000 Love their party city receipt hanging out of his pocket.

00:03:19.000 No, no, no, no.

00:03:20.000 Justin Trudeau spares no expense for his costumes.

00:03:23.000 He had someone in India get all the sizes.

00:03:26.000 This is a big deal.

00:03:27.000 And then they shipped them over, and then they tried them on once or twice.

00:03:31.000 Justin and his wife had sex in them. 0.97

00:03:33.000 They're a very sexual couple, which I'm pro-family here.

00:03:38.000 I always encourage sex in a marriage. 0.94

00:03:39.000 but in this instance, it makes my toes curl.

00:03:43.000 And then what happens when And then what happens when Trump shows up?

00:03:51.000 Big hug.

00:03:52.000 What are those white lines?

00:03:54.000 Oh, those are hats.

00:03:56.000 Oh, that was confusing.

00:03:58.000 I thought he had part of his outfit was a blazer with 30 knives sticking out of one side.

00:04:04.000 It's an old warrior blazer I have from the independence world with Pakistan.

00:04:09.000 Pakistan.

00:04:12.000 Zinzabad, Pakistan.

00:04:20.000 Allah Akbir!

00:04:22.000 What is that from?

00:04:24.000 That's a chant they have in Pakistan.

00:04:26.000 Allahu Akbir?

00:04:28.000 Yeah.

00:04:29.000 Allah Akbir? 0.99

00:04:31.000 I think it means free beer for Allah. 0.72

00:04:35.000 Oh, okay, so it is beer.

00:04:37.000 It's not a miss.

00:04:37.000 Yeah.

00:04:38.000 Okay, I thought it missed.

00:04:39.000 There's a misunderstanding with the 72 virgins.

00:04:41.000 It's 72 beers.

00:04:43.000 You know, which is too many beers.

00:04:45.000 I don't want that many beers.

00:04:46.000 Who would agree?

00:04:47.000 Be bloated.

00:04:48.000 That's disgusting amounts of beers.

00:04:50.000 Oh, shit.

00:04:50.000 Speaking of that, Lent is coming.

00:04:53.000 I ate meat every day growing up in India, beef, chicken, and pork, even toad.

00:04:57.000 Many Hindus also eat meat, and as of course do Muslims and others.

00:05:02.000 The idea that Trump is in for a dietary shock in India simply reflects CNN's cultural ignorance.

00:05:08.000 Yeah, exactly.

00:05:10.000 That's what I was saying with Black History Month, that thing I put on my YouTube channel.

00:05:16.000 These people don't like, this is actually a much bigger picture, sorry.

00:05:20.000 These people don't like what they're talking about.

00:05:23.000 They're not genuine.

00:05:24.000 I hate liars because liars waste my time.

00:05:24.000 That's what I hate.

00:05:27.000 I'm a curious gentleman, as are you.

00:05:29.000 I want to know stuff.

00:05:31.000 So when someone's talking about immigration, they go, we're a nation of immigrants.

00:05:34.000 They're putting kids in cages and all these other platitudes.

00:05:36.000 I always say, how many immigrants, how many illegals are there in this country?

00:05:40.000 And they'll say numbers ranging from 1 million to, I'm not exaggerating, 9 billion.

00:05:47.000 A woman, lesbian with dreads, said 9 billion to me once. 0.99

00:05:51.000 And you go, okay, so you're not genuinely interested in it.

00:05:53.000 You don't know.

00:05:54.000 You don't understand.

00:05:55.000 You're not familiar with any of the terms.

00:05:56.000 Fuck off and stop wasting my time.

00:05:59.000 Similarly, environmentalists, as we discussed yesterday, they say, oh, Mother Earth, I'm really into the Earth.

00:06:04.000 And we only have one Earth.

00:06:05.000 Don't throw it away.

00:06:06.000 And don't hurt nature.

00:06:08.000 Nature is wonderful.

00:06:09.000 We're made of nature.

00:06:11.000 And then you talk to some redneck and he's like, that's a crackle. 0.99

00:06:13.000 They're looking for bugs on the hull of the boat.

00:06:15.000 And that there's long grass.

00:06:17.000 The salamanders love long grass.

00:06:20.000 It gives them shade and all that shit.

00:06:21.000 They know their shit because they genuinely care.

00:06:24.000 And these people at CNN who pretend that they are into multiculturalism don't actually know anything About India.

00:06:31.000 They don't know Indians even.

00:06:31.000 Never been.

00:06:33.000 And Black History Month.

00:06:35.000 Black History Month is all blacks doing white things. 1.00

00:06:40.000 Like, hi, I'm a painter and I'm raising money for the environment.

00:06:46.000 It's called African Tree Nation that we do.

00:06:50.000 And we're also taking donations for an African drum circle awareness class that you can take, white person.

00:07:00.000 It was announced on NPR.

00:07:02.000 It's never truly black.

00:07:04.000 It's never collared greens.

00:07:05.000 It's never chitlins and grits.

00:07:07.000 It's never black eyed peas.

00:07:10.000 You know what I mean?

00:07:12.000 Similarly with this shit.

00:07:14.000 So yeah, you pretend you love India and you think because a large percentage of Hindus worship cows that no one there eats fucking meat.

00:07:23.000 Yes, vegetarianism is prevalent there.

00:07:27.000 It's a massive swap.

00:07:29.000 President Trump, who's died as off in a rotation of steaks, burgers, and meatloaf, faces a potential shock as he prepares to travel to India where Hindus are the majority and cows are revered as sacred.

00:07:39.000 Because I read that once.

00:07:42.000 I don't know that to be true.

00:07:43.000 I just think it's true.

00:07:45.000 And I don't know to what extent it's true.

00:07:47.000 Ron Coleman says, how old are you?

00:07:54.000 I was just talking to Ron Coleman.

00:07:56.000 I was on the plane and there was some Hasid. 1.00

00:07:59.000 My son was saying, should I learn Chinese?

00:08:02.000 And I go, no, sorry.

00:08:04.000 French.

00:08:06.000 And I go, I could help you with it, but no, you're never going to, when did you last hear me speak French?

00:08:10.000 I said, Spanish makes sense.

00:08:14.000 And then on the plane in New York City, I was thinking, Yiddish.

00:08:18.000 Hasids do a lot of business in New York. 1.00

00:08:20.000 And if you're in construction or something, it would be very beneficial to speak Yiddish to these Hasids and say, get the fuck off my construction site. 1.00

00:08:30.000 No, just kidding.

00:08:31.000 It's the new show.

00:08:32.000 Yeah.

00:08:32.000 I wrote an article once for Tacky Mag about bumping into a Hasid on the plane, and we talked for the whole ride.

00:08:37.000 And as someone from Montreal, upstate New York, and Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I have never not been around Hasids since I was 18. 1.00

00:08:45.000 So they're not weird to me.

00:08:46.000 Yeah, they're not weird.

00:08:47.000 But they are weird.

00:08:48.000 But they are weird.

00:08:49.000 But not to me.

00:08:50.000 But not strange.

00:08:50.000 They're not foreign.

00:08:52.000 So anyway, in the article, I talk about how we got along and I was, what are you doing?

00:08:58.000 You're just going to 100% of all my articles?

00:09:01.000 Yes.

00:09:03.000 So anyway, we got along.

00:09:05.000 There we go.

00:09:05.000 Six hours with a Hasid.

00:09:07.000 So when I first wrote this article, so we talk and we have a lot.

00:09:11.000 We have very different lifestyles and we realize that our differences are few and we both love our families and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

00:09:20.000 It was kind of a schmaltzy, love-y article.

00:09:27.000 And then it ended with like, okay, bye, I'll see you around.

00:09:31.000 And we have each other's number or whatever.

00:09:32.000 And I thought, that's too, I thought, no, let me make a funnier ending than that schmaltzy sort of like perfect happy ending.

00:09:40.000 And I wrote, and as he walked down the aisle in front of me, texted the plane, I looked at him and I just thought, fuck you, Jew. 1.00

00:09:52.000 So I wrote it and I sent it to Amandalina Theodoracropolis.

00:09:57.000 And she goes, I can't run this.

00:09:58.000 No, we're not doing that.

00:09:59.000 And I go, it's clearly a joke.

00:10:01.000 I got along with them the whole time.

00:10:03.000 And it's also kind of a parody of anti-Semitism because they're unshakable.

00:10:07.000 She's like, no, give it to someone else.

00:10:09.000 So I was working at the Daily Caller at the time.

00:10:11.000 I had a column at the Daily Caller.

00:10:12.000 I had worked for them.

00:10:13.000 Was it the Daily Caller?

00:10:17.000 Something like that.

00:10:18.000 Yeah, it's pretty sure it was a Daily Caller because I remember considering calling Tucker.

00:10:22.000 So I'd written a couple articles for them and I sent it to them and they sent me back an email saying, we will be paring down our contributors now just for financial reasons.

00:10:36.000 So we won't be paying you for your articles anymore.

00:10:40.000 But if you still want to write for us for free, definitely submit and maybe we'll get in.

00:10:45.000 But as far as actually paying you for articles, yeah, that's not happening anymore.

00:10:49.000 I was like, okay, I guess the fuck you Jew ending is not as funny as I thought it was. 1.00

00:10:59.000 Why was Trump so welcomed in India?

00:11:02.000 It's so hard to care about shithole countries.

00:11:04.000 I'm sorry.

00:11:05.000 Like, is he pro-diarrhea?

00:11:09.000 Is he bringing toilets?

00:11:12.000 Is he working on the national toilet plan where America sends them free plumbing?

00:11:19.000 Like, who gives a fuck about India? 0.63

00:11:22.000 So hot.

00:11:23.000 I don't even like Florida.

00:11:25.000 I mean, I like Floridians, but the temperature there, I just think, well, no one can live there.

00:11:31.000 Good guy.

00:11:31.000 Good person.

00:11:32.000 He's so fucking cool, isn't he?

00:11:34.000 Yes, he is.

00:11:36.000 I know what to do.

00:11:38.000 You see Justin Trudeau around him, too.

00:11:39.000 He's just sort of like, hi, what's happening?

00:11:42.000 What are you guys?

00:11:43.000 You guys sitting over there?

00:11:45.000 Okay.

00:11:46.000 I guess I'll put stuff in my briefcase again.

00:11:50.000 Remember that was such an awesome scene.

00:11:52.000 It was at some summit where Trump ignores.

00:11:58.000 It was at some UN thing, and Trump was ignoring Trudeau, and he just kept putting stuff in and out of his briefcase.

00:12:04.000 What?

00:12:05.000 What's happening here?

00:12:06.000 And you see Trump see him, and Trump is like, oh yeah, there's that gay guy from Canada.

00:12:11.000 What's his name again?

00:12:12.000 Hey, kid, what's up?

00:12:13.000 What's going on?

00:12:14.000 They're only showing the new one because he was recently snubbed again.

00:12:16.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:12:18.000 Perfect.

00:12:19.000 Yeah, you know what I'm learning from the news these days is how it's reported says so much about this country and their bias.

00:12:27.000 So if you want to look up the clip I'm talking about, you'll only find the clip where Justin Trudeau was laughing with like some Angela Merkel or someone about how Trump is crazy.

00:12:39.000 And that's only by hearsay.

00:12:42.000 Oh, these are other times he's been snubbed.

00:12:44.000 Okay, well, bye.

00:12:45.000 I understand you're busy.

00:12:47.000 Fuck off.

00:12:48.000 Wouldn't that be funny if we found out later that he just, when Justin Trudeau came over, he just said, fuck off.

00:12:55.000 Don't ever touch me again.

00:12:57.000 What was that?

00:12:58.000 I said, don't ever touch me again.

00:12:59.000 All right, I'm out of here.

00:13:00.000 I want you out of here.

00:13:02.000 Back home to mommy.

00:13:04.000 Later.

00:13:05.000 JK.

00:13:06.000 But yeah, you can see how biased they are against Trump by the availability of that video.

00:13:11.000 Similarly, Haiti is in a complete fucking shithole riot, as all shitholes tend to do. 1.00

00:13:22.000 The police want to form unions there.

00:13:24.000 Good luck.

00:13:25.000 Just to be clear, let me go back a step.

00:13:27.000 What is the history of Haiti?

00:13:29.000 Let me tell you the history of Haiti.

00:13:30.000 Some dumb white person said, why are we giving slaves Sunday off?

00:13:35.000 Not that I'm condoning slavery, but that made the slaves very, very mad because they said, from now on, you guys work seven days a week.

00:13:43.000 You're not getting off Sundays.

00:13:45.000 So we can't worship our God?

00:13:46.000 No, fuck you.

00:13:48.000 Okay, well, we're going to kill you all.

00:13:49.000 So the slaves revolted.

00:13:51.000 Some say this was the catalyst that ended slavery, I believe.

00:13:55.000 And they started murdering white people en masse.

00:13:59.000 Women, children, everyone.

00:14:01.000 I'm sure if you read an account on the Huffington Post, it would be of this awesome rebellion that was totally cool when they slit little babies' throats and raped women to death.

00:14:12.000 You know what they did?

00:14:13.000 They would take their skulls, empty them out, and then they'd fill them with white person's blood and then drink the blood from the skull, as Blackie Lawless from the band Wasp does in the album Fuck Like a Beast. 0.86

00:14:28.000 Anyway, so they won.

00:14:30.000 It's yours.

00:14:31.000 You killed all the French. 1.00

00:14:33.000 This is your island now.

00:14:34.000 How's that working out?

00:14:36.000 How is your freedom working out?

00:14:37.000 Freedom is a gift.

00:14:39.000 If your dad gives you a motorcycle for your birthday, treat it nice.

00:14:44.000 Keep the oil at the right level.

00:14:46.000 Winterize it.

00:14:47.000 Make sure it's clean.

00:14:49.000 Make sure everything works.

00:14:50.000 Check the right indicator.

00:14:52.000 Check the left indicator.

00:14:54.000 How are the air filters?

00:14:55.000 Are they clean?

00:14:57.000 Have them cleaned out if you don't know how to do it.

00:14:59.000 I don't know how to do it.

00:15:01.000 I actually have no idea where my air filters are, but I do have it cleaned every year.

00:15:04.000 Anyway, so it's a fucking disgusting shithole.

00:15:08.000 Port-au-Prince, I believe is, oh, it was the most dangerous place in the world, but it's recently been surpassed by Caracas in Venezuela.

00:15:18.000 And as far as rape goes, it was winning, but South Africa recently trumped it since apartheid was abolished. 0.99

00:15:25.000 I'm not condoning apartheid.

00:15:27.000 I'm just, in both of these cases, this is people being given freedom and squandering it, right?

00:15:34.000 You should definitely visit.

00:15:37.000 Fuck you, Charles Bryant.

00:15:39.000 You go visit it.

00:15:40.000 It is actually super fun.

00:15:42.000 Remember that woman who went back to Somalia, that journalist, to show the world that it's actually a very safe place?

00:15:49.000 And she was promptly killed?

00:15:52.000 Or the Pippa Becca, who went hitchhiking from Italy up to Turkey to show you that these Muslims, they don't rape people, and she was promptly raped.

00:16:01.000 And I believe dismembered and burned alive.

00:16:04.000 Anyway, I'm off at 37 tangents here.

00:16:11.000 Haiti is having insane riots.

00:16:14.000 And the way it's being reported tells you so much about what you see on the news.

00:16:19.000 It tells you how much you're being lied to.

00:16:22.000 So I look it up, and Ryan, who's incompetent at even finding the word cars online, I try to find any information about it.

00:16:35.000 So the Washington Post will probably have something about our colonialization.

00:16:40.000 But the article, the headlines say things like, they'll start with like Chile, Venezuela, what other places having riots?

00:16:50.000 Fucking France.

00:16:52.000 And now Haiti.

00:16:53.000 Join the list of countries who are blah, blah, blah. 0.55

00:16:55.000 So they preface it with other countries are having riots too, you know.

00:16:59.000 It's not just Haiti.

00:17:01.000 And then they call it, so the police want unions and the government is killing them and then murdering everyone else.

00:17:07.000 And then people are killing both sides, the military and the police and each other.

00:17:11.000 And so they call it an anti-government protest and they try to make it look civilized.

00:17:16.000 It's fucking mayhem over there.

00:17:20.000 Absolute mayhem in a shithole country full of people who don't appreciate their freedom in a shitty, corrupt government that's a fucking mess.

00:17:32.000 Like Hillary Clinton keeps getting shit for all the money she squandered there. 1.00

00:17:38.000 No money could save Haiti after that. 0.95

00:17:41.000 Sean Penn, thank you for going down there and smoking cigarettes and doing Coke and fucking black chicks. 1.00

00:17:46.000 But there's no way to save it.

00:17:47.000 Is this modern?

00:17:50.000 Okay, don't show that.

00:17:51.000 Is that someone being burned alive?

00:17:54.000 Is that modern, Ryan?

00:17:56.000 This is recent, yeah.

00:17:58.000 So when?

00:18:00.000 Because the rides I'm talking about are this week.

00:18:01.000 Yeah, last.

00:18:02.000 This has been going on since last year or something?

00:18:04.000 So last year.

00:18:05.000 2009, February 2019.

00:18:07.000 Oh, this is recent?

00:18:08.000 2019?

00:18:09.000 That's not recent.

00:18:11.000 This past week, Haiti's been in a complete civil war, total and utter mania, shit government, shit police, shit system, just a complete fucking mess, and no one will report on it because they don't want to sound racist.

00:18:24.000 All these articles are from 2019.

00:18:27.000 No, it's this week.

00:18:28.000 No, I know.

00:18:29.000 That's what you're saying, is that there's no reports of it.

00:18:31.000 Yeah.

00:18:32.000 They're totally avoiding it.

00:18:32.000 This one.

00:18:34.000 There's the old one.

00:18:35.000 And every time you see someone mentioning it, they preface it with some justification, meaning it's not their fault.

00:18:42.000 So we're at a point now where media is so bad that you can sort of read it like tea leaves.

00:18:47.000 And you can go, oh, wait a minute.

00:18:52.000 The way that they're avoiding this means there must be something to it.

00:18:56.000 Oh, Trump.

00:18:58.000 The Trump thing.

00:19:00.000 Oh, so you're pretending that all Indians are vegetarians because you want to shit on Trump.

00:19:05.000 So you're not about the news at all.

00:19:07.000 You're an anti-Trump publicity firm.

00:19:10.000 Okay, okay.

00:19:11.000 I understand what's going on now.

00:19:15.000 Speaking of reporting, Jazz Jennings is a Jewish man, gay person who at the Age of, I think, 18, maybe even 17, had his genitals mutilated with the utmost support of his parents and the media.

00:19:41.000 They want you to know that it's wonderful that this Jewish kid cut his cock down the center, removed most of the meat, maintained the urethra but clipped it, then folded the meat inwards such that the penis hairs are growing inside this vagina. 1.00

00:20:05.000 If you want to throw up, if you're trying to lose weight, ladies, and maybe now that Jazz is a lady, she can join in. 1.00

00:20:13.000 Look at the vaginas they make. 1.00

00:20:17.000 Jazz Jennings says she is super happy.

00:20:21.000 Like, look at the way this is reported.

00:20:23.000 Again, we don't let kids drink alcohol until they're 21.

00:20:26.000 They can't have tattoos until they're 18.

00:20:29.000 You can cut your cock off.

00:20:33.000 Just be a fag. 1.00

00:20:35.000 Just be a fag and dance around. 1.00

00:20:38.000 Worst case scenario, you're a gay man, or say you're a woman. 1.00

00:20:43.000 All right, now you're a woman with a strap on built in like Gigi Gorgeous. 1.00

00:20:49.000 Gigi Gorgeous has a great setup. 1.00

00:20:51.000 She's with her rich, he's with his rich lesbian. 1.00

00:20:55.000 He's in a heterosexual relationship, by the way.

00:20:57.000 Gig Gorgeous.

00:20:58.000 I'm obsessed with Gigi Gorgeous, maybe to a disturbing level.

00:21:02.000 I have to watch it when I'm in bars going through my feed because I follow it on Instagram.

00:21:09.000 Look at that.

00:21:11.000 That is a dude, just a very feminine dude married to a chick, and he fucks her inner pussy. 1.00

00:21:18.000 Okay, we're good.

00:21:20.000 You've come full circle.

00:21:21.000 Welcome back home.

00:21:22.000 I should have said that when he started getting tits. 1.00

00:21:24.000 See you on the way back down, Gigi.

00:21:27.000 You'll be back.

00:21:28.000 You'll be back.

00:21:29.000 To regular ways of life.

00:21:32.000 That lesbian was like, I love chicks and I like sexy, really feminine women, but the strap-ons and the sex toys, yes. 1.00

00:21:41.000 And you got to pack them and you got to wash them.

00:21:44.000 I wish I could find just a chick who had a built-in strap-on. 1.00

00:21:48.000 And then Gigi Gorgeous goes, hey, I'm actually exactly what you're looking for.

00:21:54.000 And they're madly in love.

00:21:56.000 But they're having fertility problems because Gigi's ovaries don't work. 1.00

00:22:02.000 Okay?

00:22:03.000 Why don't you just use your wife's ovaries, you dunce? 1.00

00:22:09.000 Holy shit, what a mess.

00:22:10.000 What's going to happen when they're pregnant? 1.00

00:22:13.000 What's Gigi Gorgeous going to do in the birthing room when that is lying on its back, lying on her back? 1.00

00:22:19.000 I actually don't see her as an it.

00:22:21.000 It's just a very masculine lesbian. 1.00

00:22:24.000 And she's pushing out of her beautiful, normal, functioning vagina. 1.00

00:22:30.000 And then she sees the miracle of birth come out of the vagina. 1.00

00:22:33.000 And she looks down at her little elephant's trunk, just like, I can't do that.

00:22:39.000 She's going to kill herself. 1.00

00:22:41.000 She goes to an OBGYN and the OBGYN goes, okay.

00:22:41.000 I can't do that.

00:22:46.000 More like an OMGYN. 0.99

00:22:50.000 Your clit is rather engorged and your vaginal canal doesn't exist. 1.00

00:22:57.000 And you have balls on your lapia. 0.92

00:23:00.000 And your husband, quote unquote, is sexually preference.

00:23:03.000 Someone stole your husband's dick. 1.00

00:23:06.000 They'll be the first couple to have a gender transplant. 0.85

00:23:13.000 Anyway, get back to the chat.

00:23:14.000 The sexuality is Jared Leto.

00:23:17.000 Go to 1-3.

00:23:19.000 That's what you just showed.

00:23:20.000 Is there a video there?

00:23:22.000 Oh, my God.

00:23:23.000 He's doing great.

00:23:25.000 This is your Jewish friend, Andy, who helps you with your math homework.

00:23:30.000 Hi, I'm Andy.

00:23:31.000 I have to make my decision about where I'm going to college.

00:23:34.000 I just don't want to let them down.

00:23:35.000 Look at those ears.

00:23:37.000 If we're going to get surgery, can we start on the nose and the ears?

00:23:42.000 I just need to talk to everyone.

00:23:44.000 Turn it up.

00:23:44.000 Why can't I hear it?

00:23:45.000 It's just been such a struggle.

00:23:46.000 Jazz, like you've never seen her before.

00:23:49.000 January 28th at night on JLC.

00:23:53.000 What's your real name?

00:23:54.000 Herschel Labinowitz?

00:23:57.000 Jennings isn't their real name.

00:23:58.000 What's one for?

00:24:03.000 Hello?

00:24:04.000 This one right here.

00:24:06.000 What the heck?

00:24:07.000 ...an event and setback where things did come apart and there was a complication.

00:24:12.000 I had to come back in for another procedure, but it was just all part of the journey.

00:24:17.000 Just pause.

00:24:19.000 Just pause.

00:24:19.000 They're mutilating this boy's penis, this teenage boy's penis, and they call, and the narrator just says, it's just part of the journey.

00:24:27.000 Do you see what I'm talking about here?

00:24:29.000 Where you have to look at the tea leaves and see what's really going on?

00:24:34.000 This makes me hate the West.

00:24:36.000 Any other culture, the East, China, Islam, Central America, Africa, they'd say, this woman, she mutilates the penis, cuts the penis, it don't work. 1.00

00:24:50.000 She goes back to the doctor four times.

00:24:53.000 They keep cutting and cutting the penis. 1.00

00:24:56.000 It does not work.

00:25:00.000 And the media, they promote this, they promote the mutilation of the genitals.

00:25:06.000 And the girl, well, she is a boy.

00:25:08.000 The boy cry.

00:25:09.000 The boy cry and cry and cry.

00:25:12.000 Why are you gay? 0.99

00:25:14.000 Go back.

00:25:16.000 Only cosmetic and external.

00:25:19.000 So it wasn't too dramatic.

00:25:22.000 Your life was never dangerous.

00:25:24.000 Wait, is she talking about her new genitals? 0.53

00:25:26.000 I think so.

00:25:28.000 Like the actual surgery was never that dramatic?

00:25:30.000 But it's just cosmetic and external.

00:25:32.000 Yeah, what's internal?

00:25:34.000 Your fallopian tubes, your uterus, your womb? 0.99

00:25:38.000 Jazz, none of the internal is real.

00:25:41.000 All you have internally is those big sacs we have.

00:25:46.000 What do you call those?

00:25:47.000 Those are the kidneys? 0.99

00:25:48.000 And the urethra.

00:25:49.000 That's it.

00:25:51.000 Our vas deferens.

00:25:53.000 Your life was never in danger.

00:25:55.000 No.

00:25:56.000 Jennings felt thankful that her two surgeons, who she described as incredible, Supported her the whole time.

00:26:02.000 Just pause.

00:26:03.000 So they mutilate her genitals. 1.00

00:26:06.000 By the way, this is, I think, after the third.

00:26:08.000 Yeah, she's had four.

00:26:09.000 She. 0.93

00:26:10.000 She's had four different surgeries as they keep botching it. 0.93

00:26:13.000 It's just cosmetic.

00:26:14.000 It's just cosmetic.

00:26:16.000 When you're getting a vagina installed, 100% of it is cosmetic. 1.00

00:26:20.000 100%.

00:26:22.000 And you know why it's all swollen and misshapen?

00:26:26.000 Because nature is hella pissed.

00:26:30.000 That's what's going on.

00:26:32.000 Nature's going, I'm trying to fix this.

00:26:34.000 I'm trying to unfurl this penis that's been furled because that's the way we designed it.

00:26:39.000 Like if we have a cut, we want the cut to want to close and the cells.

00:26:46.000 If we break our arm, we want the bones to want to go, I'm trying to make it good again.

00:26:52.000 Mikey.

00:26:55.000 So when you mutilate yourself, your body doesn't know this.

00:26:58.000 This is a new trend.

00:26:59.000 It's like, what, five years old?

00:27:00.000 No one let nature in on this new hip trend of mutilating your genitalia. 1.00

00:27:07.000 Nature just finally figured out the giant plug earrings. 0.99

00:27:10.000 They just caught up with that.

00:27:14.000 It's just complicated.

00:27:16.000 In a clip from I Am Jazz, one of Jennings' doctors, Marcy Bowers, admitted the first surgery did not go as planned and turned out to be more difficult than they had imagined.

00:27:25.000 Bowers told Jennings, I think in hindsight, we would never have sent you home from the hospital.

00:27:30.000 Just because this woman is incredible, by the way.

00:27:34.000 Wait a minute, is that a trans surgeon?

00:27:39.000 Play.

00:27:40.000 Ah, this has been a real journey, hasn't it?

00:27:43.000 Jennings' father, Greg, I think the surgeon is trans.

00:27:46.000 I vote yes.

00:27:47.000 She's got a Caitlin Jenner vibe.

00:27:50.000 As laid back about the complications as his daughter had been.

00:27:53.000 He revealed that he's glad the doctors were honest, but disappointed that expectations had not been met.

00:27:58.000 Thankfully, all seems well after this third surgery, and Jennings is on the road to recovery.

00:28:03.000 Boy, Jewish kids are sure taking bullying to a new level. 1.00

00:28:07.000 Some Jewish trainees have huge knockers. 1.00

00:28:11.000 Did you see his breast?

00:28:13.000 Oh, really?

00:28:14.000 Yeah.

00:28:14.000 He had some milkers.

00:28:15.000 Oh, yeah.

00:28:17.000 Oh, yeah.

00:28:17.000 No, you don't.

00:28:26.000 I call them my battle wounds because they signify the strength and perseverance it took to finally complete my transition.

00:28:32.000 Jennings hoped to inspire other people by showing the world her scars, telling the New York Times, I hope the people appreciate it.

00:28:38.000 Do you want to know how he got these scars?

00:28:44.000 We all have bodies.

00:28:46.000 Some are bigger.

00:28:46.000 Okay, that's enough.

00:28:47.000 That's enough.

00:28:48.000 Why is that surgeon trans? 0.87

00:28:51.000 Why not?

00:28:53.000 Like, what if you're a basketball player and you're black and you're 6'7 and the surgeon operating on you is black and 6'7 and plays basketball?

00:29:02.000 You'd be like, hell of a coincidence.

00:29:05.000 No, it's not.

00:29:06.000 I'm here because of you.

00:29:08.000 And we decided it'd be best if someone like you was working on you.

00:29:12.000 No, thank you.

00:29:13.000 Just get the absolute best surgeon in this entire hospital.

00:29:17.000 I don't need you to also play basketball.

00:29:19.000 I'm not looking to bond.

00:29:21.000 In fact, I'm going to literally be completely unconscious the entire time we're working together.

00:29:26.000 All right, now go into my memes, that memes folder I sent you, because that's her third surgery going great, right?

00:29:32.000 No, the memes folder I sent you.

00:29:35.000 Gotcha.

00:29:39.000 And you can see that the third surgery didn't go great.

00:29:44.000 There were more complications.

00:29:46.000 It's complicated.

00:29:47.000 Hey, you know what else is complicated?

00:29:49.000 Love.

00:29:50.000 Lots of things that are wonderful are complicated.

00:29:53.000 Raising kids, it gets kind of complicated.

00:29:57.000 Turning your dick?

00:29:58.000 No, no, no.

00:29:59.000 Why would you cut to it before I say what it is?

00:30:01.000 There's tons of different memes in there.

00:30:04.000 So the bottom one.

00:30:05.000 There's also a gif, though, isn't there?

00:30:09.000 Oh, yeah.

00:30:11.000 Well, pull that up, please.

00:30:13.000 Give first? 0.69

00:30:17.000 Uh, it doesn't open with the there we go.

00:30:21.000 No?

00:30:23.000 I didn't get a gif in there.

00:30:27.000 I got no gift.

00:30:28.000 I'm giftless.

00:30:29.000 Okay, maybe I can send it again.

00:30:31.000 So what's that thing, the multiple picture one of her?

00:30:35.000 This is as follows.

00:30:41.000 I have woken Jazz out of a dead sleep and taken the dilator.

00:30:44.000 Wait, wait.

00:30:47.000 Just read it out while I find it.

00:30:48.000 Is that the surgeon?

00:30:49.000 No, that's her mother.

00:30:51.000 Oh.

00:30:51.000 I have woken Jazz out of a dead sleep and taken the dilator and put the lubrication on it and said, here, you take this and put it in your vagina.

00:31:02.000 If not, I will.

00:31:04.000 And now go to the other meme.

00:31:09.000 It's dilation time.

00:31:11.000 No, mom, no.

00:31:13.000 Oh, shit.

00:31:13.000 So it's not there.

00:31:15.000 There's a video of Jazz Jennings going, mom, mom.

00:31:19.000 And her mother comes upstairs.

00:31:21.000 Just look up Jazz Jennings on YouTube.

00:31:23.000 And what's the problem?

00:31:24.000 And she goes, she shows her mother a picture and she goes, oh, God. 1.00

00:31:28.000 And I think what happened is you still have erectile tissue.

00:31:34.000 So you still get a morning wood.

00:31:36.000 But your wood is just like shot with a shotgun.

00:31:40.000 So like the lips swell up.

00:31:44.000 This is jazz.

00:31:44.000 No, that's not it.

00:31:45.000 I want to understand from you.

00:31:47.000 That's not it.

00:31:48.000 But she had this massive swollen mess. 1.00

00:31:51.000 Keep going.

00:31:52.000 Here, let me see the icons.

00:31:53.000 Maybe I can recognize it.

00:31:57.000 She's sitting in her own bed.

00:32:00.000 Fuck.

00:32:04.000 All right.

00:32:04.000 We're pausing the show right now.

00:32:08.000 Okay, we can't find the clip.

00:32:10.000 Maybe you can help find it at home.

00:32:11.000 She's sitting in her bedroom and she goes, mom, mom, and her mom comes up and shows her her vagina. 1.00

00:32:17.000 Thank God they don't show it.

00:32:18.000 I'm pro-censorship in this case.

00:32:21.000 Censored.tv has found something they want censored.

00:32:24.000 And, oh, speaking of censorship, I got to show you the FBI released these, all these files on Proud Boys.

00:32:32.000 It's amazing.

00:32:33.000 But anyway, and her mom goes, Ugh, and then they call the doctor who that trans woman I showed you earlier. 0.99

00:32:40.000 And then the doctor looks at her vagina on FaceTime and says, Oh my god, yeah, you got to come back in. 1.00

00:32:46.000 That's four fucking surgeries.

00:32:50.000 Is that an indication that you're not doing something right?

00:32:55.000 Like if it, if you, if you ask a girl out on a date four times and she says no every time, maybe let it go.

00:33:02.000 Maybe you guys aren't meant to be.

00:33:03.000 Hey, Jazz, not that there's any turning back now, but maybe you made a huge fucking mistake and your parents are sadistic megalomaniacs who are essentially practicing Munchausen syndrome.

00:33:17.000 Okay, so this is a similar clip, but I'm not sure if this is the third or the fourth time she's been in there, but this poor Chinese guy who probably became a doctor to help kids with cancer has to go deal with her disgusting vagina now. 1.00

00:33:34.000 The vagina he made. 0.99

00:33:36.000 She took a shower, she changed her clothes.

00:33:38.000 Okay, let's take a look.

00:33:42.000 You know, I was a little surprised.

00:33:44.000 Jazz is young and healthy, and normally patients like that heal really quickly, but instead it's...

00:33:53.000 Oh, on top of the other transsexual doctor Jess Ting. 0.98

00:33:58.000 Because every Jess Ting's gonna be all right. 0.95

00:34:01.000 It just looked like the sutures were starting to spread, and the color of the skin right along the edge of the wound, you want it to be nice and pink, but it was looking dusky, kind of bluish, which can be a sign of too much tension, there not being enough blood supply.

00:34:17.000 So I fucked up pretty bad.

00:34:19.000 But nobody's going to ever see it.

00:34:21.000 So I'm concerned about a malpractice too.

00:34:25.000 Obviously.

00:34:25.000 Was a possibility that there wasn't a lot of skin.

00:34:28.000 So I'm just worried that everything here is under a lot of tension.

00:34:31.000 I don't want that last ditch to pop and then everything will just go, you know, like a window shade.

00:34:39.000 Plus the way it just sort of rapidly got worse over the course of one day, I was like, ooh, maybe we should just intervene early.

00:34:48.000 Taking her to the OMAR will allow us to take a good look on the inside, really see what's going on.

00:34:52.000 There's good lighting, we have good instruments.

00:34:54.000 All right, enough.

00:34:56.000 Wow.

00:34:57.000 Now I'm guilty of this too.

00:34:59.000 I decided that I was a muscular hunk stuck in a Grover body and I was working out at the gym boxing and I noticed that my punches were not having the impact I wanted them to have.

00:35:09.000 And so I started on a drug treatment plan just like this woman, just like Jazz Jennings. 0.98

00:35:18.000 And it did work.

00:35:20.000 I took it for four months and I noticed if I feel my arms now, they feel very solid.

00:35:25.000 And there's actually some new sort of muscle here that sort of pinches down.

00:35:29.000 It gets pointy here.

00:35:30.000 I never had that before.

00:35:33.000 So I would say my muscle growth has increased maybe 3%.

00:35:39.000 Now, there's other side effects I've had.

00:35:41.000 I've been a little snappier because I have higher testosterone.

00:35:44.000 I had to lie too.

00:35:45.000 I think I was at like 550.

00:35:47.000 And he said, that's perfectly reasonable for a man your age.

00:35:50.000 And I go, yeah, but sex sucks.

00:35:53.000 And I'm never horny.

00:35:55.000 And I feel weak and tired.

00:35:57.000 All lies.

00:35:58.000 And he goes, okay, well, here, take this clamiphene.

00:36:01.000 It makes your balls make more testosterone. 0.69

00:36:03.000 So I took it.

00:36:04.000 I felt the past four months, I haven't been very, very happy.

00:36:07.000 I have nightmares all night, every night, guaranteed.

00:36:09.000 That's just a given.

00:36:11.000 I'm so used to nightmares now that I'm just goth.

00:36:13.000 Like I go to bed going, all right, going back to hell, ready to fight demons.

00:36:19.000 I'm either trying to get late and I haven't been fucked once in my life, or I'm fighting someone, or I murdered someone, and I'm on the run.

00:36:27.000 There's always major problems.

00:36:29.000 I love waking up in the morning because I'm not going to prison anymore and no one's died and no one's trying to kill me.

00:36:36.000 Waking up is wonderful.

00:36:37.000 I wake up like this every morning.

00:36:39.000 Phew.

00:36:41.000 So that wasn't great.

00:36:43.000 And I could handle the, it wasn't really depression.

00:36:46.000 It was like, or maybe it was anxiety.

00:36:48.000 It was just like feeling bad.

00:36:50.000 So I tolerated that for months and that wasn't good.

00:36:54.000 But here's what I really can't tolerate.

00:36:56.000 Losing my fucking hair.

00:36:59.000 Look at that.

00:37:02.000 My son took this picture when we were at the Mets game.

00:37:06.000 And before he showed it to me, he goes, you're going to cry.

00:37:10.000 He said that?

00:37:11.000 Yeah.

00:37:11.000 Oh, man.

00:37:12.000 Is there another picture of the baldness?

00:37:15.000 I only see one there, but I believe the other one was removed.

00:37:20.000 Oh.

00:37:21.000 Okay, switch the camera to auto, and I'm going to show you my Jazz Jennings conundrum.

00:37:26.000 This is new.

00:37:36.000 Oh, sorry.

00:37:40.000 This is new.

00:37:42.000 These sort of holes.

00:37:43.000 This used to be a perfect rug.

00:37:46.000 And now you can sort of see into it.

00:37:48.000 You can see into the forest.

00:37:51.000 That's a new development.

00:37:52.000 And then, of course, this shit at the back.

00:37:55.000 I can't really see what I'm doing right now.

00:37:57.000 Do you see that?

00:37:58.000 You got a...

00:38:02.000 Don't turn around.

00:38:03.000 You just tell me where to move.

00:38:05.000 Okay, that's good.

00:38:06.000 Okay.

00:38:06.000 This is all new.

00:38:09.000 So, I went online and I bought Rogaine.

00:38:13.000 Now, Jazz, the beauty of all these things that we're doing is, you do it for...

00:38:23.000 Can you hand me that bag?

00:38:26.000 You can do something like this.

00:38:27.000 You start taking the clomiphen, you notice that it's not working.

00:38:33.000 And so you stop.

00:38:36.000 Now, my hair might not grow back, and that would be a catastrophe.

00:38:40.000 But it's not the end of the world, and it's not irrevocable.

00:38:45.000 I may have put myself in a situation where I have lost some of my hair permanently.

00:38:53.000 That sucks, but it's not cutting your dick off.

00:38:57.000 All right, what do we do here?

00:38:59.000 It says it works.

00:39:00.000 Clinical studies proven that it does happen.

00:39:02.000 Yeah, is that on rogain.com?

00:39:06.000 Rogaininvestor.help.

00:39:09.000 How do I use for best results?

00:39:11.000 Apply one milliliter with applicator two times a day directly onto the scalp.

00:39:17.000 Oh, so that I noticed that this says it's not good for this, it's only good for the balding at the back.

00:39:23.000 The front doesn't look bad.

00:39:25.000 Well, it's got to be the same shit.

00:39:26.000 I'm going to try just putting that on the front, too.

00:39:29.000 So maybe you could administer this for me.

00:39:31.000 What are all these...

00:39:35.000 Where's the instructions?

00:39:36.000 I think you just...

00:39:40.000 It says one milliliter with applicator.

00:39:42.000 So there's the one milliliter line.

00:39:44.000 And these are all the same, right?

00:39:46.000 Yeah.

00:39:46.000 This is very simple.

00:39:49.000 Where?

00:39:51.000 Directions.

00:39:52.000 Apply one milliliter with dropper two times directly on the scalp.

00:39:55.000 Yep.

00:39:56.000 Using more or more often will not improve results.

00:39:59.000 Continued use is necessary to increase and keep your hair regrowth.

00:40:02.000 Or hair loss will begin again.

00:40:04.000 What?

00:40:05.000 Well, of course they're going to say that, right?

00:40:08.000 The second you stop using our product.

00:40:10.000 All right, so...

00:40:13.000 I wonder if my hair product...

00:40:21.000 I think it's a pushdown.

00:40:24.000 Push down the hairs.

00:40:31.000 Okay, maybe we should mix it up a little bit first?

00:40:35.000 So the beauty of this, folks, is you can watch here live on the show as we try to retrieve my hair.

00:40:44.000 Alright, Ryan.

00:40:46.000 This will be your job every day.

00:40:50.000 Twice a day.

00:40:53.000 I'm going to leave it here.

00:40:55.000 Oh, no, I better not.

00:41:01.000 It kind of naturally feels familiar.

00:41:03.000 So how does that not spill down my jacket?

00:41:06.000 We can get you a little.

00:41:08.000 Go get a paper towel from that drawer in the kitchen.

00:41:14.000 Administer gently in little drops.

00:41:18.000 Oh, it tastes awful.

00:41:20.000 Hey, why don't I go in front of the camera with my back to the camera?

00:41:25.000 Oh, here you're there.

00:41:26.000 That'll be the best angle.

00:41:30.000 Just a little skimpy.

00:41:32.000 No, no, no.

00:41:32.000 It doesn't have to be exact.

00:41:39.000 Yeah, that's fine.

00:41:39.000 It naturally goes to a milliliter anyway.

00:41:42.000 All right.

00:41:42.000 So I'm going to refocus it.

00:41:45.000 Just going down a little bit more.

00:41:48.000 Administering.

00:41:52.000 So do you rub it in?

00:41:54.000 Yeah, probably.

00:41:54.000 Rub it in.

00:41:56.000 Just rub it in, why don't you?

00:42:00.000 No, you're very gentle.

00:42:02.000 You.

00:42:09.000 So this is what the raise was for, wasn't it?

00:42:14.000 It doesn't come with gloves, so I'm sure it's not corrosive, but you might get hairy palms.

00:42:18.000 And then people are going to see you in bars with your hairy hands and go, let me guess, chronic masturbator? 0.68

00:42:23.000 I'm blind.

00:42:24.000 No, I think it's just a matter of...

00:42:30.000 Like, it's not just that one spot.

00:42:31.000 No, no, no, no, no.

00:42:32.000 You stay with the one milliliter.

00:42:33.000 Was that one milliliter total?

00:42:36.000 Well, put some in the front then.

00:42:38.000 Put a milliliter in the front.

00:42:41.000 It says it's not for the front, but they can go fuck themselves.

00:42:43.000 Yeah, look at it.

00:42:44.000 This is how I ended up bald in the first place, too.

00:42:47.000 By saying, I'll handle it.

00:42:53.000 I can already feel it growing back.

00:42:57.000 Oh, shit.

00:42:59.000 It's probably not good for the eyes.

00:43:02.000 Yeah, the front's really not that bad.

00:43:03.000 I don't want a hairy forehead.

00:43:04.000 I don't want a hairy forehead.

00:43:10.000 Great, I'm going to be growing patches all over the place now.

00:43:13.000 It doesn't work like that.

00:43:16.000 It doesn't work like that, did you say?

00:43:17.000 Yeah.

00:43:18.000 As he screws on the dropper instead of the cap.

00:43:22.000 Ryan's an expert.

00:43:24.000 Oh, okay.

00:43:25.000 That's a convenient little thing.

00:43:27.000 Because now that's your score bottle, and the other ones are reserved.

00:43:30.000 Oh, okay.

00:43:33.000 I'm blurry now.

00:43:35.000 Wash these figures before it's too late.

00:43:39.000 Let me get this.

00:43:40.000 The Rogane is making it focus wrong.

00:43:44.000 Camera!

00:43:45.000 Camera!

00:43:46.000 I'm here!

00:43:50.000 There we go.

00:43:53.000 All right.

00:43:54.000 So that is our new sponsor.

00:43:58.000 They didn't ask for it.

00:43:58.000 Rogane.

00:44:00.000 Better fucking work.

00:44:02.000 And again, folks at home...

00:44:04.000 Actually, I'm going to take it with us to...

00:44:12.000 We're going to go to CPAC.

00:44:16.000 The moral of the story here is linked to Jazz Jennings, and that is, you know, if you want to build muscle, just lift more weights and drink muscle milk or something.

00:44:26.000 There's no magic fix.

00:44:28.000 There's no super trick you can do where you just take this clomiphene and all of a sudden you're ripped.

00:44:33.000 It did increase my muscle mass by a tiny fraction, and I had to pay the Piper.

00:44:37.000 It goes back to Johnny Depp.

00:44:38.000 He dumps Vanessa Paradise because she's losing her beauty, and Satan says, okay, I'll give you Amber Heard. 1.00

00:44:45.000 And then slowly his beauty starts fading.

00:44:48.000 And he's a freak.

00:44:50.000 That was pleasant.

00:44:54.000 How are we doing for time?

00:44:55.000 What else should we talk about?

00:44:58.000 He looks like a ghoul.

00:45:00.000 Oh, he's looking better now that he dumped her, but when he was dating her, he had AIDS. 0.50

00:45:04.000 We talked about this, though, on the show already.

00:45:06.000 Here's some, let's just check in on the left and the election for a second here.

00:45:11.000 Maxime Water sent out a tweet that I just thought was fucking incredible.

00:45:17.000 It was such an obvious lie.

00:45:19.000 And the meme that accompanies it.

00:45:20.000 This is sorry, 1.9.

00:45:22.000 The meme that accompanies it makes that, drives that point home.

00:45:27.000 Unfortunately, I'm not...

00:45:32.000 Oh, but I can go to her.

00:45:34.000 The meme I won't have, but I could probably find it at Maxine's.

00:45:37.000 Well, follow them.

00:45:38.000 Did you follow them?

00:45:39.000 Yep.

00:45:40.000 I have to wait for them to approve it.

00:45:41.000 Yep.

00:45:42.000 So it's Maxine Waters saying, every single gun owner I know told me that after he bought the gun, he felt the murderer growing inside him.

00:45:55.000 He felt the murderer being born.

00:45:58.000 And the meme below it is, so we're just making shit up now?

00:46:03.000 Like, you and I all know a million people with guns.

00:46:06.000 When was the last time you heard one of them go, I don't know, when I got it in my hand.

00:46:13.000 Not in a movie, in real life.

00:46:15.000 I got it in my hand.

00:46:16.000 I got that pistol in my hand.

00:46:18.000 I just thought, boo.

00:46:22.000 Boo.

00:46:24.000 I could kill anyone.

00:46:26.000 I'm a murderer now.

00:46:29.000 So that's too bad we don't have that one.

00:46:31.000 I should probably check to make sure I'm not.

00:46:32.000 I shouldn't follow private people, actually.

00:46:36.000 Oh, she didn't?

00:46:38.000 It says it's false.

00:46:39.000 As soon as I walked out of that gun store, I felt a killer growing inside of me.

00:46:44.000 Well, let's be careful because PolitiFact is rarely right.

00:46:47.000 Yeah, I don't trust Snopes anymore either.

00:46:49.000 Well, but what do they say?

00:46:50.000 It says it's a viral image, and this is supposed to be Maxine Waters' tweet about gun owners, but it's not real.

00:46:57.000 It comes from a fake account.

00:46:58.000 Oh, Maxine PW.

00:47:00.000 Ah, okay.

00:47:01.000 Well, that's good to know.

00:47:02.000 Right.

00:47:02.000 False.

00:47:04.000 We gave you news that was fake news.

00:47:07.000 Fake news here on censored.tv.

00:47:09.000 By the way, I sent you that FBI thing.

00:47:11.000 Did you get that?

00:47:13.000 Okay, yep.

00:47:14.000 Okay.

00:47:15.000 Okay.

00:47:16.000 I got it, boss.

00:47:17.000 Okay, boss.

00:47:19.000 It's a separate email, correct?

00:47:22.000 Yep.

00:47:22.000 Did I not send it?

00:47:23.000 Yep, FBI records, got it.

00:47:25.000 So this is the FBI releasing all their information on Proud Boys, speaking of censored and fake news.

00:47:29.000 Let's see what they've got to say about this terrorist group.

00:47:32.000 Disclaimer, blah, blah, blah, boring.

00:47:34.000 Proud Boys, part one of one.

00:47:35.000 All right, go down to the PDF.

00:47:38.000 Okay, here we go.

00:47:39.000 Page one.

00:47:40.000 Let's zoom in.

00:47:41.000 All right, not a lot.

00:47:42.000 This is just a table of contents.

00:47:44.000 Oh, okay.

00:47:45.000 So the FBI has been doing some research.

00:47:49.000 I can't tell you the case ID or anything.

00:47:51.000 No, go up, go up, go up.

00:47:52.000 What's that synopsis?

00:47:54.000 Can you read that out?

00:47:55.000 Yes.

00:47:55.000 the authorized purpose for this blank is to identify criminal activity perpetrated by the proud boys.

00:48:00.000 Move it within the blank.

00:48:01.000 The objectives, blank, blank, blank, blank, blank, blank, blank, blank, blank.

00:48:08.000 This is the FBI.

00:48:10.000 These are the people in charge of our security.

00:48:12.000 Keep going.

00:48:13.000 Focus operational plan.

00:48:15.000 Okay, what's your plan?

00:48:17.000 It's blank.

00:48:18.000 Okay.

00:48:19.000 Prove by, can't tell you.

00:48:20.000 I don't want to be murdered by the Proud Boys, of course.

00:48:23.000 Identified members of Proud Boys.

00:48:25.000 CC blank from blank.

00:48:26.000 Contact blank.

00:48:27.000 Approved by blank.

00:48:28.000 Case ID number blank.

00:48:28.000 Drafted by blank.

00:48:30.000 You name blank.

00:48:31.000 Ryder received information from the blank.

00:48:33.000 Field office blank.

00:48:37.000 Oh, we got some details.

00:48:37.000 Details.

00:48:38.000 Uh-oh.

00:48:39.000 On the 18th of December, 2017, Ryder received information from the blank.

00:48:45.000 Yeah, that's what I just read.

00:48:46.000 Field office blank.

00:48:48.000 Page three of three.

00:48:49.000 Well, there you go.

00:48:50.000 Huh.

00:48:51.000 So don't say that this administration and the FBI is not transparent.

00:48:56.000 They tell us everything.

00:48:58.000 We know what's going on now.

00:48:59.000 This is freedom.

00:49:00.000 This is democracy.

00:49:01.000 This is the freedom for information.

00:49:05.000 What's it called?

00:49:05.000 Freedom of information.

00:49:07.000 All right.

00:49:08.000 So now check out Bernie Sanders.

00:49:09.000 I thought this was a fucking hilarious meme.

00:49:12.000 We better make sure this is true, though.

00:49:17.000 You want to keep the minimum wage low and give tax breaks to millionaires? 0.99

00:49:21.000 That is not what it makes America great.

00:49:24.000 All right, 2015.

00:49:25.000 Was that 2015?

00:49:26.000 Yeah.

00:49:27.000 Are we comfortable to see a huge increase in millionaires and billionaires, but have more people living in poverty than ever?

00:49:33.000 I know I'm not.

00:49:34.000 This is when he starts seeing he's going to become a billionaire.

00:49:36.000 He probably has like...

00:49:41.000 Wait a minute, though.

00:49:43.000 Oh, yeah, sorry.

00:49:44.000 He's probably not a millionaire.

00:49:45.000 Probably has like 700 grand in the bank, but it's going up fast.

00:49:48.000 So he has to start throwing in billionaires.

00:49:50.000 So wait, go to the top one.

00:49:52.000 It's just millionaires.

00:49:55.000 And he probably has 600 grand in the bank.

00:49:58.000 And then it becomes like 780, and he goes, uh-oh, this is getting really close to 1 million.

00:50:04.000 That makes me a millionaire.

00:50:05.000 Are we comfortable to see a huge increase?

00:50:08.000 And then what's the next one?

00:50:10.000 Are we comfortable as a nation to see a huge income?

00:50:12.000 That's the same one, isn't it?

00:50:14.000 Yeah, it's just the same point, exactly.

00:50:16.000 And then he becomes a millionaire.

00:50:18.000 Billionaires should not exist.

00:50:21.000 That's Bernie.

00:50:22.000 And this is little Marco Rubio, who I've made fun of in the past, but he's babbling in his car and actually making some salient points.

00:50:30.000 Hit it, Marco.

00:50:34.000 The Democratic establishment steals it from them.

00:50:37.000 Bernie Sanders, a Democratic socialist, is going to be the Democratic nominee for president.

00:50:41.000 And that's a really big deal because democratic socialism sounds benign, but at the core of Democratic socialism is Marxism.

00:50:49.000 And at the core of Marxism is this fake offer that if you turn over more of your individual freedom, we're going to provide you security.

00:50:57.000 We're going to provide you free health care.

00:50:58.000 We're going to provide you free education.

00:51:00.000 But the problem is that when they can't deliver on it or when you're not happy with it, you don't get your freedoms back.

00:51:06.000 And by freedoms, I don't just mean elections.

00:51:07.000 I'm talking about the right to choose your own doctor, the right to make health care decisions for yourself, what your kids learn in school, what schools they go to.

00:51:14.000 All that stuff you lose control over and you don't get it back just because the security they promised you didn't happen.

00:51:21.000 So that's what we're on the verge of having to decide here in this country.

00:51:24.000 It's a reason why people flee countries that have this stuff.

00:51:27.000 It's a big deal for America.

00:51:28.000 And I hope people start waking up to that reality.

00:51:30.000 The bottom line is that unless...

00:51:39.000 I like Rubio.

00:51:41.000 And they never mention Venezuela or Cuba when they talk about socialism.

00:51:45.000 They talk about Denmark.

00:51:47.000 Yeah, Denmark, where they have a 25% VAT tax.

00:51:52.000 25% of what you buy, you pay a value-added tax.

00:51:58.000 You want that?

00:51:59.000 Okay, let's Do it, and as I said to that stupid feminist, you realize that the only time you can name a country better than America is it's a country that's more white than America. 1.00

00:52:10.000 That's really what they want, ultimately.

00:52:12.000 They want Den you want to, they want to be Denmark. 0.98

00:52:16.000 Um, okay, shall we hit the mailbag?

00:52:23.000 Vomitos! 1.00

00:52:25.000 Riot, shut up, you don't have a dad.

00:52:30.000 Let's turn our eyes together's mailbag.

00:52:35.000 Let me touch it.

00:52:37.000 My beard looks disgusting in that picture.

00:52:41.000 Hello, my name is Carlos.

00:52:43.000 I'm the president of the BCTC Republicans.

00:52:44.000 I'm running to see if you can one day come and speak at my college.

00:52:47.000 It'll be an honor to have you come to my college.

00:52:50.000 So I responded.

00:52:51.000 I'm now telling you my personal emails.

00:52:53.000 I get one of these a week.

00:52:54.000 Then they talk to the people in charge and they say no, and it gets canceled.

00:52:57.000 Don't waste my time unless you are 100% sure this is a go.

00:53:01.000 He said, I talked to two of the people in charge of my college.

00:53:04.000 One of them is secretly a fan of yours.

00:53:05.000 The two of them said yes, but they will talk to the other people in charge to see if it's okay for you to come.

00:53:10.000 I will let you when they officially say yes.

00:53:11.000 So this has happened to me 8 billion times, and we negotiate the fee and everything and the contract, and then someone gets nervous.

00:53:20.000 And that's the end of that.

00:53:23.000 Although I will be at CPAC right now.

00:53:26.000 If you're watching this, I am doing a talk simultaneously.

00:53:29.000 You're watching this at 8 o'clock Wednesday today.

00:53:33.000 I am doing a talk with Alex Jones about free speech.

00:53:36.000 Don't fret, as Linton Koisey Johnson said in the song Sonny's Letter, don't fret.

00:53:43.000 Your little boy, Jim, Imgetares.

00:53:47.000 We have good courage, Mama.

00:53:50.000 Don't worry.

00:53:54.000 London Rikstan Prison.

00:53:57.000 This is a fucking awesome song.

00:54:00.000 Although it is about killing a cop.

00:54:03.000 Anyway, we'll be recording it.

00:54:07.000 Ryan's going to bring all his equipment down and I'll be laughed up and we'll put it on censored.tv.

00:54:17.000 And maybe stream some of it, possibly, right?

00:54:20.000 So, dude, Out for Bud fixed his picture.

00:54:22.000 Huh.

00:54:23.000 And I think we have a winner.

00:54:26.000 Is this in the censored mailbag?

00:54:29.000 Mailbag at Censored?

00:54:31.000 Mailbag at Free Speech, actually.

00:54:33.000 Okay.

00:54:33.000 Gotcha.

00:54:34.000 Looking.

00:54:35.000 Thomas Ricada.

00:54:37.000 I'm in at 2.45 p.m.

00:54:37.000 Okay.

00:54:39.000 Uh-huh.

00:54:39.000 Yep, yep, yep.

00:54:41.000 Just patiently wait for...

00:54:46.000 That's a big one.

00:54:47.000 So he must be using a brush.

00:54:50.000 Oh, yeah, that looks real.

00:54:52.000 Oh, shit.

00:54:53.000 What a talented artist.

00:54:56.000 He said he's looking for work.

00:54:57.000 That's one of the most accurate pictures I've ever seen of me.

00:55:01.000 That's post-Rogaine, clearly.

00:55:05.000 This is when I spilled Rogaine all over myself.

00:55:10.000 That's great.

00:55:11.000 Okay.

00:55:13.000 Oh, this is an interesting one.

00:55:16.000 White guilt is not genetic, and this is why. 0.97

00:55:18.000 This is from a guy named Chris.

00:55:20.000 Maybe you already knew this, but hopefully I can elucidate on the issue of white guilt in the world and make it seem a little bit more clear as to why it exists.

00:55:28.000 To put it simply, our culture questions things more.

00:55:32.000 It's a consequence of having an inquisitive mind and a culture that invented empiricism.

00:55:37.000 So instead of just assuming we're right all the time, which is what other cultures do, for instance, Africans don't question their sexuality or the universe or how it's structured, whereas we question such things. 0.70

00:55:49.000 So we inadvertently created a moral dilemma every time we do something.

00:55:54.000 So, this guy might want to take it easy on the so's. 1.00

00:55:57.000 So, we're not necessarily genetically predispositioned for guilt, but our advanced culture as an unconsidered consequence can make people feel erroneously guilty.

00:56:10.000 It should also be mentioned that a lot of it has to do with people, liberals in particular, who believe we are all the same psychologically.

00:56:17.000 Our differences are evident and highly consequential.

00:56:20.000 Using the African culture example again, the world for them is magic.

00:56:25.000 Why else would they kill bald men to get the gold in their heads?

00:56:29.000 It's ridiculous, but in a magical Dungeons and Dragons world, it's possible.

00:56:33.000 I like you better than a friend.

00:56:35.000 Chris, it's I like you more than a friend, okay?

00:56:39.000 I don't know how many times I have to say this.

00:56:44.000 This is from Miss Prisma Prisima Alex.

00:56:48.000 I never heard such a name before.

00:56:50.000 Have you?

00:56:51.000 Never in my life.

00:56:53.000 Greetings to you and your entire family.

00:56:55.000 I guess he's seeing Ryan as, or she is seeing Ryan as a family member.

00:57:00.000 Dear one, interesting.

00:57:03.000 Phraseology.

00:57:04.000 I am Miss Prisema Alex and the first, so she's the first Prisema Alex.

00:57:10.000 I guess women can be a third in her culture. 1.00

00:57:14.000 Oh, sorry.

00:57:15.000 I am Miss Prisema Alex.

00:57:16.000 There's no period there, so confuse me.

00:57:18.000 I and my brother need you to stand as our guardian to retrieve our inheritance U.S. dollars of $5.2 million.

00:57:32.000 What?

00:57:33.000 What?

00:57:43.000 Damn dog! 0.97

00:57:48.000 Are they for real?

00:57:49.000 Wow, that's a which our father deposited in a finance house before his assassination.

00:57:56.000 For reasons which we will let you know as soon as we hear from you, contact me here in my private mail address, Prisima Alex at gmail.com.

00:58:08.000 That's exciting.

00:58:10.000 That's going to be an exciting part of the show.

00:58:13.000 Wow.

00:58:15.000 I want money.

00:58:16.000 So do we get a cut?

00:58:18.000 Oh, yeah.

00:58:19.000 Well, she said she needs to stand as our guardian.

00:58:23.000 I think the implication there is that I decide how much they get.

00:58:26.000 Oh.

00:58:27.000 Okay, I'll do it.

00:58:29.000 But I get 5.2 No, 5.19999.

00:58:36.000 You get 20 bucks.

00:58:38.000 But at least your father's inheritance will be out of that evil bank's hands.

00:58:44.000 All right, last one.

00:58:45.000 Gavin and Ryan, I thought you might enjoy this soundbite from Emmanuel TV.

00:58:48.000 It's a whack job African program with a faith healer. 1.00

00:58:51.000 No, no, I saw this one.

00:58:52.000 It's boring.

00:58:53.000 He's not speaking English.

00:58:55.000 Gavin, the person rapping on that decent Mura Masa track is Slowtie.

00:59:00.000 Yes.

00:59:01.000 So I got that wrong.

00:59:03.000 I said his name is Mura Masa.

00:59:04.000 Muramasa is the producer, the DJ who made the track.

00:59:07.000 The rapper is Slowtie, and he's from Northampton.

00:59:10.000 I apologize.

00:59:13.000 Finally, we have Ryan.

00:59:16.000 This is from Mark, Marcus, reviewing a water filter.

00:59:19.000 We'll make that the last one.

00:59:21.000 No, we got one more.

00:59:22.000 Okay.

00:59:23.000 Do you want to check that out, Ryan?

00:59:25.000 Yep.

00:59:26.000 This is you reviewing a water filter.

00:59:29.000 I'm also going to distill a variety of water.

00:59:32.000 Smells tap water.

00:59:34.000 Most of the best deal.

00:59:35.000 *laughs*

00:59:41.000 And filtered water purchased from a water store.

00:59:45.000 You'll be surprised of what is left in the pot after the distillation.

00:59:50.000 At least I was surprised.

00:59:51.000 So let's find out how it works.

00:59:53.000 How old is this symbol?

00:59:55.000 This is one of the oldest symbols.

00:59:57.000 First, let's take a look at the unit itself.

00:59:59.000 I bought it on eBay.

01:00:03.000 That's got to be Thai, right? 0.99

01:00:04.000 That's not Chinese. 1.00

01:00:07.000 First, let's take a look at the unit itself.

01:00:10.000 I bought it on eBay a while back.

01:00:14.000 It sounds like boiling water.

01:00:16.000 Yeah.

01:00:16.000 Or as the Québécois would say, un pas de noix-y boy.

01:00:19.000 Noix-y.

01:00:20.000 The cost of the press cooker alone is already more than the eBay water.

01:00:23.000 More than the eBay water.

01:00:25.000 Not to mention, you have to get other materials.

01:00:29.000 You have to boil a toad.

01:00:31.000 You have to get other materials.

01:00:34.000 Alright, well, that's going to take over my entire life.

01:00:37.000 Alright, so subscribed.

01:00:41.000 We just smashed this subscribe.

01:00:44.000 So let's take a look.

01:00:45.000 I don't know what he's on about, but I can listen to it all day.

01:00:51.000 Alright, last one.

01:00:52.000 This one is kind of long.

01:00:54.000 Oh, wait.

01:00:54.000 He sent a bunch of.

01:00:58.000 Oh, I don't know if I want to watch this.

01:01:02.000 Tor browser.

01:01:03.000 The links are all Tor browser.

01:01:04.000 You got to be careful with some of our viewers too, because they'll go, you were right about China. 0.99

01:01:08.000 It does suck.

01:01:08.000 Here's a picture of someone eating a baby.

01:01:14.000 Here's someone being burned alive in China.

01:01:17.000 Or Africa, sorry. 1.00

01:01:18.000 Hey, Gav, I too hate China and regularly update my friends with the shit that is happening there. 0.99

01:01:18.000 All right. 0.99

01:01:23.000 Here in Australia, we have kowtowed to them 100%.

01:01:26.000 They take our mineral resources, our water, and our real estate.

01:01:29.000 They've infiltrated the government on both sides.

01:01:31.000 They provide so much investment in tourism that we don't ever seem to want to upset them.

01:01:36.000 For example, a school won't name its new swimming pool after its most famous swimmer because it could upset the Chinese.

01:01:42.000 Matt Horton's whole school plans to name its new pool after Olympic Champion because it could threaten its business.

01:01:47.000 Why would they give a shit?

01:01:51.000 The school is a boarding.

01:01:53.000 Let me see that.

01:01:54.000 It has a boarding house in China and hosts a strong Chinese population.

01:01:57.000 Horton has endured a feud with Chinese rival Sun Yang, calling him a drug cheat.

01:02:02.000 Oh, I remember that.

01:02:05.000 Yeah.

01:02:07.000 Sun Yang was up there getting his swimming award and he's like, I'm a total winner.

01:02:11.000 I bought it or I buy.

01:02:14.000 And the Australian refused to shake his hand. 0.52

01:02:17.000 So because of that, this guy is a cheat, by the way.

01:02:20.000 Minor detail.

01:02:22.000 So we have to kowtow to their criminals.

01:02:25.000 Like, it would be okay if it was an amazing country that was way better than us and way more ethical.

01:02:32.000 China's Sun Yang confronts British swimmers after.

01:02:34.000 Sun Yang is at the center of a center of more competitors.

01:02:42.000 After another protest, Sun's action there towards Duncan Scott, who's refusing to get up there for the podcast.

01:02:57.000 Scott in lockstep with the podium protest by Australia's Mac Horton, who labels Sun a drug cheat.

01:03:07.000 Scott doesn't want to be a part of the Sun government.

01:03:11.000 As they left the pool deck, it got ugly.

01:03:14.000 Sun confronting Scott here.

01:03:17.000 You're a loser.

01:03:18.000 Get out of my way.

01:03:19.000 I'm winning.

01:03:20.000 Yay! 0.99

01:03:21.000 I'm winning, yes.

01:03:22.000 I'm Team Mac.

01:03:24.000 Oh, wait, I was still doing the Chinese accent.

01:03:26.000 Although the government has banned the Chinese from entering Australia because the coronavirus university is paying Chinese students to fly to a third country before entering to circumvent the quarantine.

01:03:34.000 Wow.

01:03:36.000 That's messy.

01:03:37.000 We'd rather die than offend the Chinese, says. 0.65

01:03:40.000 You're supposed to click on the link, my dear?

01:03:43.000 Australia offered to return via third country.

01:03:47.000 The left-wing news even says that coronavirus is exposing our racism.

01:03:51.000 I've seen that a few times.

01:03:54.000 I've sensed a shift in the attitude towards China, ignoring their human rights violations.

01:03:57.000 That's the other thing that bugs me with these lefties.

01:03:59.000 They go, you're an Islamophobe.

01:04:01.000 No, I just don't want gays thrown off buildings. 1.00

01:04:03.000 And the culture you like has women as second-class citizens. 1.00

01:04:06.000 I thought you were a feminist. 1.00

01:04:08.000 The burqa was actually very empowering.

01:04:10.000 Really?

01:04:11.000 Try not wearing it and see how that works out for you.

01:04:15.000 Middle Eastern ladies. 0.86

01:04:18.000 It's comfortable compared to the alternative of stones.

01:04:21.000 I would say that when Penny Rimbaud, the guy who started Crass, had cancer, he was taking all these Chinese herbal medicines.

01:04:27.000 And I said, why do you like the Chinese so much? 0.74

01:04:30.000 They destroy animals.

01:04:32.000 They torture them.

01:04:33.000 They fucking eat them alive.

01:04:36.000 They don't see them as living beings.

01:04:38.000 They see them as garbage.

01:04:40.000 If it moves, it's food.

01:04:42.000 And you're a vegetarian animal rights guy.

01:04:45.000 As long as it's not white people, then they can get away with murder, literally. 0.99

01:04:49.000 Praising them for stupid shit like defending, or like reducing carbon emissions, even defending their communist regime.

01:04:54.000 What the fuck is going on?

01:04:55.000 If you haven't done so, look into Zhu Zaidang.

01:04:58.000 He's an MMA fighter who proved Chinese martial arts are inferior to Western combat, and he was basically depersoned.

01:05:05.000 Radio DJ and mixed martial arts practitioner who unwittingly has become the center of a massive cultural war in China.

01:05:15.000 One that began a time when the Chinese government was deep into a movement known as the Great Rejuvenation.

01:05:22.000 Oh, he said they're inferior to Western combat campaign designers.

01:05:26.000 Well, yeah, I mean, all this Wushu, kung fu, just punched him in the face. 1.00

01:05:33.000 But what's the dancey part?

01:05:36.000 through means like making mastery of Tai Chi mandatory for graduating certain Chinese high schools I mean, it's healthy. 1.00

01:05:43.000 It's probably good for your circulation.

01:05:47.000 What's going to do after you got punched?

01:05:50.000 Yeah, let's see.

01:05:51.000 Tyson Fury up against one of these guys.

01:05:53.000 Right.

01:05:53.000 ...throws the professional level fencers and blowing back groups of attackers with a single pin.

01:05:59.000 What?

01:06:00.000 I have actually done it.

01:06:02.000 Yeah, I believe that.

01:06:15.000 No, but the Chinese constantly push it. 1.00

01:06:17.000 In fact, Jet Li is one of Jet Li's first film back when he was Lilianjie was called Master of Tai Chi.

01:06:25.000 And it was about how he used Tai Chi to gain revenge at his enemy who was actually his brother.

01:06:33.000 Did you know it?

01:06:34.000 Total bullshit.

01:06:36.000 So his credit score is reduced to nothing and his gym taken from him because he embarrassed China. 0.96

01:06:42.000 Is that it?

01:06:43.000 Yeah.

01:06:44.000 Tai Chi Master.

01:06:45.000 So that's the brother being bad.

01:06:48.000 They both grew up together, but the brother got power hungry.

01:06:51.000 And then Chetly went nuts.

01:06:54.000 And so he went to some, I don't know what the fuck those things are called, monasteries, whatever.

01:07:00.000 I've seen the scene before, yeah.

01:07:01.000 And then he slowly starts getting back by using Tai Chi.

01:07:06.000 Nothing wrong with that.

01:07:09.000 If I push, each force has an equal and opposite reaction.

01:07:14.000 It's almost like physics.

01:07:17.000 Maybe I can use his strength against him.

01:07:20.000 He comes at me.

01:07:21.000 I go with him, not against him.

01:07:25.000 Oh, I see.

01:07:31.000 Hit the comedy guy.

01:07:32.000 What the?

01:07:33.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:07:34.000 Oh, God.

01:07:39.000 Physics is weird in China. 0.94

01:07:40.000 Great show...

01:07:46.000 Great movie for little kids, don't get me wrong.

01:07:52.000 My hands feel weird with this roll gain on it.

01:07:55.000 Maybe all it is is like a plastic kind of thing.

01:07:58.000 That protects it from it.

01:07:59.000 And what it does is it stops more hair from falling out because it's plasticked in there.

01:08:03.000 So you're really just gluing your hair to your head.

01:08:05.000 Maybe it's like a glue, if you will, and collects dusts.

01:08:12.000 Maybe it's getting good at it.

01:08:13.000 If you will.

01:08:15.000 All right.

01:08:15.000 I've also sent some of the worst videos I've seen out of China in recent weeks.

01:08:18.000 Some are kind of funny, but some are more disgusting than you could ever imagine.

01:08:21.000 Maybe not even suitable for the show.

01:08:22.000 So we will not be clicking on those, but I may check those out in my spare time.

01:08:26.000 We are done.

01:08:27.000 The show is over.

01:08:28.000 We like to end things with a fun video.

01:08:31.000 And this, I believe, was a viewer submission.

01:08:35.000 And it is a Scottish translation.

01:08:38.000 It was What If 80s cartoons, the cartoons I grew up with, were Scottish.

01:08:42.000 This is what it would have been like.

01:08:48.000 No way, man.

01:08:49.000 A pure massive robot?

01:08:50.000 Actually, I'm a transformer.

01:08:52.000 But listen, I'm here to.

01:08:53.000 What do you transform into me?

01:08:56.000 You can hear that the guy doing the American accent is Scottish because he's like, actually, I'm a...

01:09:04.000 Pure magic, you're for your outer space.

01:09:07.000 A motor vehicle, but that's of no importance.

01:09:09.000 I am here to.

01:09:12.000 No, look, I am here to save the world from.

01:09:15.000 Can you say Boza Busfell first, mate?

01:09:17.000 Please listen.

01:09:18.000 This is of great importance, too.

01:09:20.000 You know, you can't even get a return anymore on these buses.

01:09:22.000 It's a bloody liberty octopus, mate.

01:09:24.000 That's not my name.

01:09:25.000 Listen, Amazon Prime.

01:09:27.000 Alright, sorry, Amazon mucker. 0.99

01:09:29.000 This was a mistake.

01:09:30.000 We're gone him.

01:09:32.000 Get it up, yees. 1.00

01:09:32.000 Forgin him. 1.00

01:09:33.000 Well, that he was giving up.

01:09:35.000 Thundercats.

01:09:36.000 Thundercats.

01:09:37.000 Hoooooooana, hoe. 1.00

01:09:40.000 Ok, here we go.

01:09:41.000 You're a hairmeister.

01:09:43.000 What you on about?

01:09:44.000 I'll keep in it for days.

01:09:45.000 I'm trying to defeat mumra. 0.99

01:09:47.000 Sniffing about the bumra, mel like. 1.00

01:09:49.000 Mate, you're pussy whipped. 1.00

01:09:51.000 Get it?

01:09:52.000 Because we're cats.

01:09:53.000 Chief, your patter's like water.

01:09:55.000 Mel like milk.

01:09:57.000 Get it?

01:09:57.000 Just pause.

01:09:58.000 Are you getting any of this?

01:10:01.000 Your patter is like how you talk.

01:10:03.000 So if someone's making a joke or telling a boy, they say, your patter's rotten.

01:10:08.000 But he's saying your patter is like water.

01:10:11.000 It's so bad.

01:10:11.000 It's so boring.

01:10:12.000 When you talk and make jokes, it's just like water.

01:10:15.000 And then he says, more like milk, cause we're cat.

01:10:18.000 I need to stop hanging about with you, man.

01:10:21.000 I need to stop what?

01:10:22.000 Hanging about with you, man.

01:10:25.000 You know what?

01:10:25.000 I'm sick of this piss.

01:10:27.000 What?

01:10:27.000 Pish's piss.

01:10:28.000 How have I got to deal with the cooking?

01:10:30.000 Well, cause you're a what?

01:10:31.000 I'm in my wet set.

01:10:33.000 Cause I'm a woman, eh?

01:10:34.000 No, cause you're a wonderful cook.

01:10:37.000 You were gonna get mince and toties, but no anymore.

01:10:39.000 Who knows?

01:10:40.000 You're already full of mince, you're totally heat.

01:10:42.000 There's a pot noodle in the cupboard, you bearded bobag. 1.00

01:10:46.000 You bearded bobag, meaning scrotum. 1.00

01:10:49.000 That is calling him hard to understand.

01:10:50.000 Scrotum.

01:10:51.000 But he said, why am I cooking?

01:10:53.000 Because you're a woman. 1.00

01:10:54.000 And then she goes, oh, because I'm a woman.

01:10:55.000 He says, no, you're a wonderful cook.

01:10:57.000 So you were going to get mince and tatties, which is mashed potatoes and mince meat.

01:11:02.000 It's so fucking good.

01:11:02.000 I'm craving it right now.

01:11:04.000 Tatties is tomatoes?

01:11:04.000 That's what I'm getting on my birthday.

01:11:06.000 Mince and tatties.

01:11:07.000 I'm going to be the birthday man.

01:11:11.000 What's the matter with your faces?

01:11:13.000 No, no, that's giving me the boke.

01:11:15.000 That's boofing, man. 1.00

01:11:17.000 Eat your soup, you're singing doorbells.

01:11:19.000 Or Moggies is Turkey Twistles.

01:11:22.000 Listen, tan that scran or I'm gonna drop a massive geriatric bear keek or your PlayStation. 1.00

01:11:28.000 I thought so.

01:11:31.000 I'll never find my Prince Charmin, will I?

01:11:34.000 You own about Henry Gorgeous?

01:11:36.000 I heard that Tony the Pony's welling to you.

01:11:38.000 I don't want Tony the Pony.

01:11:40.000 I want Prince Charmin, eh?

01:11:42.000 Wait, is your idea of Prince Charmin, a human that rides a horse?

01:11:46.000 Or rides a pony, if you know what I mean, eh?

01:11:49.000 Mate, that's bouffin'.

01:11:51.000 Somewhere in the Scottish borders, there's an old manke castle where this wee guy goes.

01:11:55.000 This was on BBC Scotland.

01:11:58.000 Bob's a wee skivvy.

01:11:59.000 He takes it tight 24-7 for your hang that stays up the stair.

01:12:03.000 Bob makers a piece and jam ya wee derk.

01:12:06.000 And there's a door in the flare where hangs commuti it eh.

01:12:09.000 And this hole in the floor is a flare.

01:12:12.000 The floor is a flare.

01:12:17.000 And there's a door in the flare where hangs commuti it eh.

01:12:20.000 And that's pretty much all that happens in every episode.

01:12:22.000 Because Waynes will watch any old mints.

01:12:27.000 Alright, that's enough.

01:12:28.000 Okay, we gotta do He-Man. 0.84

01:12:29.000 Any old mints?

01:12:30.000 No, we gotta do He-Man. 0.89

01:12:31.000 Yeah, shit.

01:12:32.000 Which is mean to Mintz.

01:12:34.000 Because she said to him, you're full of mints at the end, you're full of shit.

01:12:37.000 Smarfet. 0.61

01:12:40.000 Wee-Man. 0.90

01:12:42.000 I'll go the power.

01:12:47.000 Wee-Man. 0.90

01:12:48.000 It's He-Man, you skinny prick.

01:12:50.000 I think you'll find it's Wee Man.

01:12:52.000 He-Man. 0.84

01:12:53.000 We-Man.

01:12:54.000 It's He-Man, alright? 0.70

01:12:57.000 Wee-Man. 0.90

01:12:58.000 I'm gonna boot your bony boys. 1.00

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - February 26, 2020

S02E130 - NO PAIN NO ROGAIN [2020-02-26 - S02E130 - NO PAIN NO ROGAIN]

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