Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - August 18, 2020


S02E200 - FREE MERCEDES [2020-08-18 - S02E200 - FREE MERCEDES]


Episode Stats


Length

53 minutes

Words per minute

157.50233

Word count

8,429

Sentence count

782

Harmful content

Misogyny

43

sentences flagged

Hate speech

18

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

This episode is dedicated to Mercedes Carrera, who is serving a life sentence for drug possession and distribution charges. We talk to her about her life behind bars and how she got her start in the drug trade. We also talk about drugs and sex on meth.

Transcript

Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:18.000 I'm from New York.
00:00:20.000 It's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
00:00:24.000 It's life a sin.
00:00:27.000 It's got me.
00:00:28.000 Music That's about a guy who did some time for dust in a baggie.
00:00:38.000 Dust is big.
00:00:39.000 Meth is big everywhere but New York.
00:00:43.000 New York's still Coke.
00:00:44.000 Miami's still Coke.
00:00:46.000 But when I go to the South, you're at a bar at 1.30 in the morning.
00:00:50.000 You're like, I'm 50.
00:00:52.000 I'm kind of pooped.
00:00:54.000 And you look around the bar and it's just golf ball eyes.
00:00:57.000 You're leaving already, dude?
00:00:59.000 Dude, we got two more days in us.
00:01:02.000 Same with the Pacific Northwest, Seattle, Portland, all those fucking towns or meth towns. 0.71
00:01:09.000 LA is still Coke.
00:01:11.000 But Coke's really bad for you.
00:01:14.000 And that's nothing compared to the old Meth Arunski.
00:01:18.000 Wow.
00:01:19.000 Like you're up for three days and you're drinking for three days.
00:01:22.000 You know how hungover you are when you party and you started it early, like around, you know, 1 p.m. and you go to 11 the next day you have AIDS?
00:01:30.000 That's nothing with vermeth.
00:01:33.000 I just heard myself doing a Gavin.
00:01:37.000 That's nothing.
00:01:38.000 I'm doing an imitation of Gavin.
00:01:43.000 And it's big in porn.
00:01:45.000 You know, when you see them really going at it in porn, and you shouldn't be watching porn, it's corrupt.
00:01:51.000 They're on meth.
00:01:53.000 Sex feels really good on meth.
00:01:58.000 In fact, a friend of mine has AIDS.
00:02:00.000 And for my wedding, he got me a vial of meth in lube.
00:02:07.000 It looks like Superman's house in the bottle, but when you shake it up, it nullifies, mollifies, whatever.
00:02:13.000 He recommended I put it on me and my lady's genitals. 0.98
00:02:16.000 He also made us about six CDs of house music, and we put that on.
00:02:22.000 What?
00:02:24.000 I'm sure he's right, but no, thank you.
00:02:27.000 Plus, that's how he got AIDS.
00:02:29.000 At a circuit party, he got breamed up the butt cake for like two days straight.
00:02:34.000 So the thing that gave you AIDS is your wedding present to us. 0.96
00:02:37.000 No, thanks.
00:02:38.000 I don't like house.
00:02:39.000 Threw the CDs away, poured the stuff down the toilet, the lube, the mess lube.
00:02:47.000 Is that the same where we had residue and you and Beckles did it before that Vice thing or something?
00:02:52.000 Or MTV?
00:02:53.000 Yeah.
00:02:54.000 And then you woke up David.
00:02:57.000 There was still some residue or something, right?
00:02:58.000 Yeah, we had to do...
00:03:06.000 And Derek and I stayed up all night partying our asses off.
00:03:09.000 And I go, uh-oh, it's 9 a.m. soon.
00:03:11.000 We got to go and do that presentation.
00:03:14.000 So we did mess thinking it would sober us up, but no.
00:03:18.000 You're just talking really fast.
00:03:18.000 You're still wasted.
00:03:21.000 Anyway, this episode is a very controversial episode.
00:03:26.000 And it's dedicated to Mercedes Carrera, who is in San Bernardino Correctional Detention Center at 630 East Rialto.
00:03:38.000 Got to be careful not to show my address there.
00:03:40.000 And the charges are pretty heinous.
00:03:43.000 We're going to talk to her today.
00:03:44.000 We have a call with Mercedes.
00:03:47.000 And, you know, when all this shit first hit the fan, I had the same instinct most of you would have, which is, cut her loose.
00:03:56.000 She's evil. 1.00
00:03:57.000 She's a pedophile. 1.00
00:03:59.000 She makes kiddie porn, distributes it, rapes her, rapes children, many children. 1.00
00:04:06.000 And you go, well, actually, let me look into this first before I ex my friend.
00:04:12.000 Because on a much smaller scale, this is what happens to the rest of us when we're seen as a Nazi.
00:04:18.000 Like my reputation is destroyed.
00:04:20.000 I'm a Nazi everywhere I go now.
00:04:21.000 And when I sit in a restaurant, I have to have my back to the wall.
00:04:24.000 I'm ready to fight at all times.
00:04:26.000 And that's because of a lie that I'm a white supremacist.
00:04:30.000 So I can sympathize with her.
00:04:33.000 And it's amazing how many just, how many people just took the bait.
00:04:37.000 Like several black people I know said, dude, I'm pissed that you're a white supremacist now.
00:04:44.000 What?
00:04:45.000 Why didn't you ask me?
00:04:46.000 And I told you before about that dude, Brandon, in LA, I forget his last name, who basically tried to blackmail me and said, I'm going to show people pictures of you and I hanging out because him and Jerry Minor, I used to hang out with when I'd go to LA and they're both black.
00:05:01.000 So instead of going, that's bullshit.
00:05:02.000 He's my friend, they go, he is?
00:05:04.000 Well, guess what?
00:05:05.000 I have pictures of us together.
00:05:06.000 I'm going to ruin his white supremacy club.
00:05:12.000 You want to talk about woke?
00:05:13.000 I'm woke.
00:05:18.000 But we have to allow for the possibility that she is guilty.
00:05:21.000 She's a friend of mine.
00:05:22.000 You're guilty till proven innocent.
00:05:24.000 There's zero evidence outside of an interview with this girl who's her daughter, by the way.
00:05:28.000 I didn't know that when I first heard the story.
00:05:31.000 And if she is guilty of molesting her daughter, I want her to get the death penalty, which is strange when it's your friend, but she's not a human being if she's molesting her daughter. 1.00
00:05:44.000 But I got to say, I've known this woman for years.
00:05:48.000 Look at that video.
00:05:50.000 What date is that?
00:05:52.000 This was uploaded 2015.
00:05:55.000 So I think it's about five years.
00:05:57.000 And I've been corresponding with her on a regular basis.
00:06:01.000 Did a photo shoot with her that never went anywhere for Penthouse Australia.
00:06:07.000 And she was a regular guest on my show.
00:06:09.000 We did stupid jokes.
00:06:10.000 There was never any, and I know her husband too.
00:06:14.000 And there was never any inclination whatsoever of not just molestation, but any malfeasance at all.
00:06:23.000 Not even like stealing 40 bucks from someone.
00:06:26.000 There may or may not have been some drugs purchased when I saw them one time.
00:06:31.000 And everyone was very on the up and up about the distribution, paying everything.
00:06:36.000 So the fact that the here's her side of the story.
00:06:40.000 Well, let me just tell you both sides.
00:06:42.000 So, the allegations are inappropriate touching, oral copulation, digital penetration, which occurred over four months.
00:06:52.000 So, that's eight counts of sexually abusing a child under the age of 10.
00:06:56.000 The pair are also accused of possession while armed.
00:07:00.000 I think they are guilty of that.
00:07:01.000 I think they did have meth in the house.
00:07:03.000 Porn stars love their meth.
00:07:05.000 Meth is, you'd be surprised how mainstream it is, though.
00:07:08.000 Like, bikers are all on fucking meth. 1.00
00:07:10.000 How do you think you drive across the country on a Harley?
00:07:13.000 You're high.
00:07:15.000 It's in their Gatorade.
00:07:17.000 I don't mean to rat them out, but.
00:07:20.000 So, and they have guns.
00:07:22.000 She's all legal guns, but she's a big gun person. 1.00
00:07:25.000 Her dad was a military guy, very good dad, by the way.
00:07:30.000 I don't believe she was molested.
00:07:32.000 Like, I can't sit here and say she was definitely not molested, but she talks about her dad glowingly.
00:07:38.000 He's dead now.
00:07:40.000 Thank God.
00:07:41.000 Doesn't have to see this.
00:07:43.000 So that's the police's side.
00:07:46.000 And they come into this porn star's house in San Bernardino, and they see cameras aimed at the bed.
00:07:53.000 Yeah, that's another thing porn stars do. 1.00
00:07:56.000 And here's the thing.
00:07:58.000 People would ask, why do you have a porn star on the site? 0.88
00:07:59.000 You're anti-porn.
00:08:00.000 Yeah, I can disagree with people.
00:08:02.000 And Mercedes and I would argue about it.
00:08:03.000 I'd say it's not healthy.
00:08:05.000 It's keeping men at home.
00:08:06.000 And she goes, well, couples like it.
00:08:07.000 It can be good for a marriage.
00:08:09.000 And I go, women don't like porn. 1.00
00:08:12.000 Oh, yeah, you'd be supposed to fuck off.
00:08:16.000 So some 28-year-old watched porn a couple times.
00:08:19.000 Men are visual.
00:08:21.000 They could look at a gaping vagina like the way a doctor does and go, wow, that's gorgeous. 1.00
00:08:26.000 Women, like, they see that and they go, Jesus Christ, what happened there? 1.00
00:08:30.000 They're not, they don't like that.
00:08:31.000 It's very graphic for them.
00:08:36.000 We just go, yeah.
00:08:39.000 They feel like they're at the gynecologist or some sort of mortician.
00:08:42.000 Now, that's how guys talk to one another.
00:08:45.000 That guy looks more like you every day. 0.94
00:08:47.000 So her side of the story is that her baby daddy was about to lose custody.
00:08:59.000 I can't remember how.
00:09:02.000 And he decided, I don't, I guess there was some sort of time limit.
00:09:07.000 Why was he about to not see her again or about to lose custody?
00:09:11.000 Because they weren't married.
00:09:14.000 Maybe that she was married to a new guy?
00:09:17.000 Or maybe he was going to adopt her or something.
00:09:17.000 Yeah.
00:09:19.000 Anyway, there was some reason why the boyfriend or the baby daddy felt in peril, felt at risk of not seeing the girl anymore.
00:09:28.000 So, and he's very Christian and he doesn't like porn.
00:09:32.000 So he got it into her head that all these things happened to her.
00:09:37.000 And Mercedes is mortified. 0.99
00:09:38.000 Now the police came in, they stormed her house, they took her hard drives and her computers.
00:09:44.000 If she was into child porn, wouldn't there be some child porn on those computers? 1.00
00:09:48.000 She said, take them, take my computers, go search them all.
00:09:53.000 And nothing came up.
00:09:54.000 But San Bernardino is one of the only places, and this will probably come up in the interview, where you can go to jail and start a trial with zero evidence.
00:10:03.000 And outside of this interview with the girl, there is zero evidence.
00:10:06.000 Now, she's been in there since February 6th, I believe, 2019.
00:10:13.000 No sign of a trial.
00:10:15.000 She could be there for five years, six years, 10 years with no trial.
00:10:20.000 This whole like thing about Swift justice is a myth.
00:10:27.000 And she's never going to, her daughter can't see her by law.
00:10:30.000 When there's been this kind of accusation, it doesn't matter how innocent she is, she has a restraining order.
00:10:34.000 She can't go near her daughter without getting arrested until her daughter is an adult, which I believe is in like eight years.
00:10:41.000 Although this happened a year and a half ago, so maybe it'll be six years at this point.
00:10:47.000 And then, so she can't see her daughter until her daughter's an adult, and that's if her daughter wants to.
00:10:51.000 Maybe she's brainwashed herself, assuming that Mercedes is innocent. 0.75
00:10:56.000 She can't work in her profession anymore, which, I don't know, good.
00:11:01.000 But she was an aerospace engineer before she did this. 0.92
00:11:04.000 She's on the spectrum.
00:11:05.000 She's very sort of...
00:11:12.000 So she can't have any other job but a dishwasher for the rest of her life. 0.99
00:11:14.000 So she's, I said to her on the phone once, I go, don't let the bastards win.
00:11:18.000 Don't let them get you down.
00:11:19.000 And she goes, I already won.
00:11:20.000 I would love to die.
00:11:21.000 This fucking prison is disgusting.
00:11:23.000 It's full of human garbage.
00:11:25.000 Drop a bomb on it.
00:11:26.000 It'd be better for everyone, including those of us inside here.
00:11:30.000 Kill us.
00:11:33.000 Now, there's another angle to all of this, which is she's MAGA.
00:11:39.000 And she was posing with Stormy Daniels about three days before she was arrested.
00:11:48.000 But that would be anti-Trump.
00:11:51.000 She doesn't like Stormy Daniels. 0.96
00:11:52.000 It was just a joke.
00:11:54.000 But she's very, she did a lot of talks.
00:11:56.000 She would do speeches with Milo and go on lots of shows.
00:12:01.000 She was into vets, and she said vets were treated really badly.
00:12:05.000 So she would take vets on dates to the porn awards, whatever those are called. 1.00
00:12:11.000 Very pro-vet, very pro-gun.
00:12:14.000 And the way that she's being treated here doesn't really match the charges.
00:12:17.000 Like there's pedophiles that have come and gone in the time she's just been waiting for her trial.
00:12:22.000 And her bail is $6 million.
00:12:25.000 Isn't that strange?
00:12:27.000 With no evidence?
00:12:28.000 What's that?
00:12:30.000 Her Instagram.
00:12:32.000 I guess she's not updating it much these days.
00:12:35.000 No.
00:12:35.000 February 2019 was last post.
00:12:38.000 19?
00:12:41.000 That's when she was arrested, February 2019. 1.00
00:12:47.000 So I want to preface all that because it's a very strange interview.
00:12:52.000 And you often, it looks like you're condoning the person when you have an interview.
00:12:57.000 I am.
00:12:58.000 I believe in my heart She's innocent.
00:13:01.000 I'd say there is a 1% to 2% chance she's not.
00:13:04.000 And we are officially leaving that open.
00:13:07.000 I think that's reasonable.
00:13:08.000 I don't think Mercedes would object.
00:13:12.000 But I just always was inspired by her.
00:13:14.000 Here's a video.
00:13:15.000 This is what introduced me to her five years ago.
00:13:18.000 There was a porn star who was a victim of a home invasion where she was then gangbanged by like five black dudes.
00:13:24.000 And no one gave a shit about it because she's a porn star. 1.00
00:13:28.000 She's a slut. 1.00
00:13:29.000 And it's this sort of sexual Puritanism of feminism where they don't treat porn stars as actual women. 1.00
00:13:36.000 Meanwhile, they go on slut walks and talk about sex work all the time. 0.99
00:13:40.000 They're fucking total hypocrites, really inconsistent.
00:13:44.000 And Mercedes was pissed at feminists for this, for ignoring the rape. 1.00
00:13:48.000 Fucking silence.
00:13:50.000 And you know what makes me mad?
00:13:51.000 And this is why I am so pissed off at modern feminists. 1.00
00:13:55.000 They claim to care about women, but when there are actually women in need, what do they do?
00:13:59.000 Fucking radio silence.
00:14:02.000 They don't give a shit about anybody but themselves.
00:14:04.000 Anita Sarkeesian has made hundreds of thousands of dollars peddling her bullshit, faux video, socially damaging crap. 1.00
00:14:14.000 And it has been damaging for gender relations and it has been damaging for women.
00:14:18.000 And I don't even want to hear about her victimhood because Cytheria, she's a real victim, a real victim of a random rape and assault.
00:14:27.000 And, you know, anybody who even dares insinuate that a sex worker doesn't deserve the same type of defense because of, because they work in sex work could go fuck themselves.
00:14:39.000 And that's what I have to say.
00:14:40.000 And that's why I am so fucking livid.
00:14:43.000 So that's the Mercedes I know.
00:14:45.000 And her husband, too.
00:14:46.000 Like, they're very intelligent people, her and her husband, Damien.
00:14:51.000 They're the ones who told me about the pill and how it encourages women to date betas because it makes the woman think she's pregnant.
00:15:00.000 And when women are pregnant, they're not looking to get boned. 1.00
00:15:03.000 They're looking for a brother-like figure, a soft, solipsistic sweetie who's going to console her and keep her safe, but not touch her sexually.
00:15:13.000 So they end up with these brother-type boyfriends.
00:15:16.000 And then they get married.
00:15:17.000 They go off the pill.
00:15:19.000 They're trying to get pregnant. 1.00
00:15:20.000 They're like, why am I married to a fag? 1.00
00:15:22.000 This guy's like my brother.
00:15:23.000 What have I done?
00:15:25.000 So it's a dangerous thing to do.
00:15:26.000 Although as a father, I kind of like the idea of my daughter not being attracted to real men until way down the line.
00:15:35.000 I just won't let her put a ring on it.
00:15:40.000 So, yeah, intelligent couple, friends of mine.
00:15:44.000 I can't see how this is true.
00:15:45.000 She adored her daughter, was very secretive about her daughter, too.
00:15:49.000 Like, she didn't put her on blast or show any pictures of her on Instagram.
00:15:54.000 She kept those worlds very separate.
00:15:58.000 And now her daughter's torn from her.
00:16:00.000 And the thing that scares me is, if I'm right and she's innocent, could this happen to anyone?
00:16:07.000 I mean, San Bernardino is unique in that you can go to jail based on a rumor, but does that mean everyone in San Bernardino this could happen to anyone there?
00:16:16.000 Anyway, let's have a quick look at what it looks like in there.
00:16:21.000 I think it's sort of like, you know, the show 60 Days?
00:16:24.000 I think it's like that.
00:16:25.000 It's like a common area.
00:16:28.000 But she gets out very little.
00:16:31.000 That's the sheriff.
00:16:34.000 Like, some of these cops, I love cops, but one of the things the cops said was, we discovered cameras in the bedroom.
00:16:41.000 Yeah, it's a fucking pornstar retard. 1.00
00:16:47.000 She's not getting out of there.
00:16:54.000 This is some weirdo who just went in there filming.
00:17:00.000 You sure can't do that at Rikers.
00:17:01.000 Thank you.
00:17:09.000 I guess that's legal there?
00:17:12.000 You kind of get the idea.
00:17:17.000 What's that?
00:17:17.000 Inmate abuse?
00:17:19.000 The jail she's at, there was a big lawsuit about inmate abuse where I think 24 of them came in and said they were getting threatened.
00:17:28.000 They said that the COs would walk around with shotguns saying someone's going to die tonight and cocking the shotgun.
00:17:36.000 When I first spoke to her, when she first went in there, she had a lot of complaints and she hated cops and said they should all be female. 1.00
00:17:40.000 But recently she's been in her letters, which they really pile up.
00:17:46.000 She said that she actually likes the COs and they're very sweet.
00:17:52.000 What's this one?
00:17:53.000 At least six inmates have accused the San Merdino County Sheriff Deputies of torturing inmates.
00:17:59.000 And they're suing now for millions of dollars.
00:18:01.000 NBC Force Gotti Schwartz is live in Rancho Cucamonga tonight.
00:18:05.000 What's in that lawsuit?
00:18:08.000 So far, all of the inmates listed in this lawsuit are in the protective custody unit where they say the only protection they need is from correctional officers.
00:18:18.000 This lawsuit is just the beginning, filed this week by six inmates.
00:18:22.000 And already by tonight, lawyers say they have found more inmates of the West Valley Detention Center claiming very specific abuse from January 2013 to March of this year.
00:18:33.000 The allegations include threats with shotguns.
00:18:35.000 racking around, making them believe that there was going to be an execution or shooting someone, and actually pointing the shotgun at someone's head.
00:18:43.000 Beating, sodomy, and even claims that guards would play games by seeing how long inmates...
00:18:50.000 How long inmates' dicks are.
00:18:52.000 Really?
00:18:54.000 No, right?
00:18:55.000 I don't know.
00:18:56.000 If there's sodomy, I mean, that seems like a farm.
00:18:58.000 You're right.
00:18:59.000 Okay, this is the last one.
00:19:00.000 This is San Diego, but I think it gives you a good idea of where she is.
00:19:08.000 they're not far off There's a cool door.
00:19:16.000 I was just about to say that, yeah.
00:19:18.000 Oh, she's in the future?
00:19:20.000 Hey, Mercedes, I know it sucks being there, but you have to admit, it has a cool door.
00:19:27.000 It's cool if you're leaving it.
00:19:29.000 And that's not even where she is.
00:19:30.000 Mm.
00:19:36.000 Yeah, I was told the whole white-collar groovy prison where you play tennis all day is done.
00:19:45.000 So if someone is incarcerated for insider trading, they're going to a place like this.
00:19:55.000 Yeah, that's why I pulled this up.
00:19:56.000 I think this gives you a good idea of where she's calling from.
00:20:03.000 Okay.
00:20:04.000 Well, I think we've done a good enough intro.
00:20:10.000 Shall we await her call?
00:20:12.000 We shall bump, bump, bump it up.
00:20:22.000 Hey.
00:20:23.000 Hey.
00:20:25.000 How are we doing?
00:20:27.000 I'm doing well.
00:20:29.000 How are you?
00:20:30.000 I'm doing well.
00:20:32.000 I hear you're having a great time in there, and you're really happy about the way things are going.
00:20:36.000 And you couldn't be more impressed with the justice system.
00:20:42.000 I, well, I have my own grievances about the criminal justice system, especially in the state of California.
00:20:53.000 But I will say that being in jail during a pandemic is at least entertaining.
00:20:59.000 I'm more entertained than probably anybody else in the state of California right now.
00:21:03.000 So there's that.
00:21:04.000 I mean, at least I have like a constant, steady flow of people to entertain me.
00:21:09.000 Get a look on the bright side.
00:21:11.000 Well, I have your birthday card here that I noticed you had all the East and the West gangsters sign it together.
00:21:21.000 I had the East side and the West side.
00:21:25.000 Our friendship brought them together.
00:21:27.000 Now, your charges are horrible.
00:21:29.000 Some of the worst charges I've ever heard.
00:21:32.000 And I know you can't say too much, but the story that's not just that I've heard, but that's sort of going around is that your baby daddy was looking to get custody, full custody, and he got her to say horrible things.
00:21:46.000 And San Bernardino is the only place where you can throw someone in jail based on rumors.
00:21:51.000 You don't need hard evidence.
00:21:53.000 That is true.
00:21:54.000 So San Bernardino County is actually the only, I found this out after I was arrested.
00:22:00.000 San Bernardin County is the last remaining county in California, to my knowledge, where you can, on allegations alone, hold people on allegations of child sexual abuse alone without any form of evidence.
00:22:17.000 And they can stack charges and keep bail artificially high.
00:22:24.000 That is true.
00:22:25.000 So my bail should be set at $6 million, making it impossible for me to bail out because they really, really, really want me to stay here.
00:22:35.000 That's what I learned.
00:22:37.000 That's incredible.
00:22:39.000 And I mean, if you're making the justice system and you look at charges like that, you'd go, I don't want them getting out.
00:22:45.000 But the real problem, I think, is, like, I get the high bail if the charges are that nuts.
00:22:50.000 The problem is you can have charges that nuts with zero evidence.
00:22:54.000 They've seen your computers.
00:22:55.000 They've been through your hard drives.
00:22:57.000 There's zero kiddie porn.
00:22:59.000 Yep.
00:23:01.000 Yep, that's true.
00:23:02.000 All true.
00:23:03.000 I always see.
00:23:05.000 I was just reading about a politician in Britain who had a much worse case, like terabyte and terabyte of kiddie porn that they found.
00:23:12.000 And I think it's getting away with like 10 months or something.
00:23:17.000 There are cases inside this county where people have been arrested who've had actual tangible evidence and had inside this county like terabytes of child porn, stuff like that, and had bail of like $100,000.
00:23:35.000 So this is a very like a political case.
00:23:38.000 Keep in mind, I was arrested during that whole Stormy Daniels thing.
00:23:42.000 So they really politicized this case.
00:23:44.000 They told the press there was a treasure trove of evidence without even having looked into the hard drives.
00:23:51.000 They basically quick claimed my daughter to my ex, gave him custody, gave him restraining orders against me and my husband.
00:24:02.000 And once, you know, when they mess up on a case, what they'll do is instead of admitting that they were in the wrong, what they'll do is instead hold people for long terms, hoping that they will eventually tire out being held in jail and push them to plead out on low charges rather than admit they're wrong.
00:24:22.000 San Bernardino County has a 98% conviction rate, which is statistically pretty much impossible.
00:24:29.000 And it's because they're basically what they do is they wear people out.
00:24:32.000 I've seen it happen here where people were truly innocent and they were held for four or five, six years on cases.
00:24:38.000 And so eventually they tire out and they want to go back to life and they'll plead out on charges that they really didn't do just because they want to go home.
00:24:45.000 And then they'll end up with time served.
00:24:48.000 Yeah, they'll get time served or they'll take a misdemeanor charge after four or five years.
00:24:53.000 I've seen it with my own eyes.
00:24:55.000 Would you do that?
00:24:57.000 No.
00:24:58.000 Because I have nothing left, so at this point, it's a battle of wills.
00:25:05.000 No.
00:25:06.000 Yeah, it's not like if you take a plea, you get your daughter back and everything's fine.
00:25:11.000 Yeah, so at this point, I'll just stay here.
00:25:14.000 I will continue to sit here and eat terrible food and be a thorn in their side.
00:25:19.000 So what's a typical day like for Mercedes? 0.98
00:25:22.000 What time do you wake up?
00:25:23.000 Are you alone in a cell?
00:25:26.000 I have a 30-square-foot cell that is all my own at wonderful Central Detention Resort and Spa.
00:25:34.000 And a lot of times I get up at 4.30 in the morning, which is when they wake us up for breakfast, chow one, which we at least are served in our cell right now because of the pandemic, which usually consists of bread and peanut butter.
00:25:48.000 And a lot of times I get up.
00:25:49.000 It consists of what and butter?
00:25:51.000 Bread and peanut butter.
00:25:53.000 Oh, okay.
00:25:54.000 Yeah.
00:25:55.000 And a lot of times I actually get up early and watch the news because it's when I can watch the news.
00:26:00.000 So I watch Sox News, which is pretty good at 4.30 in the morning because I get the New York Report.
00:26:07.000 Wait, and you watch that in a common area?
00:26:11.000 Well, actually, you know, it's kind of nice.
00:26:12.000 So, actually, I like this jail.
00:26:14.000 This is the better jail.
00:26:15.000 The other jail was the worst jail that I was at for a while.
00:26:19.000 So, this is the nice jail.
00:26:20.000 And, you know, I have to say, all things being equal, this is the better jail.
00:26:25.000 The deputies here are very nice.
00:26:28.000 So, as much as I can complain about the criminal justice system, I will say that our deputies here are excellent.
00:26:35.000 So, I got to give a shout out to the, it's not their fault that the justice system here sucks. 0.85
00:26:40.000 But, wait a minute.
00:26:41.000 We've been putting your address up at the end of the show.
00:26:44.000 Is that the same address?
00:26:47.000 The address, I'm at Central Detention Center.
00:26:50.000 Yeah, that sounds really cool.
00:26:51.000 630 East Rialto Avenue.
00:26:55.000 Yeah.
00:26:56.000 And our deputies here are really cool.
00:26:58.000 So, even though I really hate the criminal justice system here, but our cops here rock.
00:27:04.000 They're great.
00:27:06.000 Deputy Pepler is fucking awesome.
00:27:09.000 I mean, they're really, our cops are really great here.
00:27:12.000 But wait a minute.
00:27:13.000 Wait a minute.
00:27:14.000 Where do you watch Fox News?
00:27:16.000 So I have a TV in front of ourselves.
00:27:20.000 Oh, great.
00:27:21.000 Yeah, so it's actually kind of nice.
00:27:23.000 So even though I'm locked down all day, but we have a TV every four cells.
00:27:26.000 So they keep us entertained here.
00:27:28.000 Even though they keep us locked up.
00:27:30.000 So you watch until what time?
00:27:33.000 Like, I want to get a breakdown of one exact day.
00:27:36.000 Fox starts at 4.30 with peanut butter.
00:27:40.000 I watch Fox until, well, I don't eat peanut butter.
00:27:43.000 Okay.
00:27:43.000 So if I'm locking one of the other girls up, or they open my cell door, I might get some hot water and make some coffee.
00:27:49.000 Instant coffee.
00:27:51.000 And until the other girls wake up, which is usually 8 or maybe 9, I get to watch Fox.
00:27:56.000 Fox News.
00:27:57.000 then usually meds comes and then after What are meds?
00:28:07.000 Medication.
00:28:08.000 When the med nurse comes, the girls get up.
00:28:11.000 Then they're up for the day.
00:28:13.000 And then what are your meds?
00:28:17.000 Psychiatric meds.
00:28:19.000 Oh, but they're all prescribed.
00:28:20.000 Are you on any?
00:28:22.000 Yeah, I had them give me an SSRI and Topamax for headaches.
00:28:29.000 Huh.
00:28:31.000 Yeah.
00:28:32.000 So what are the effects of that?
00:28:35.000 So just no headaches.
00:28:36.000 And what's the first one?
00:28:37.000 Topohedzamin? 0.61
00:28:39.000 It's an SSRI.
00:28:40.000 It's called effects or it ups the serotonin level.
00:28:44.000 Yeah, after a while, the lack of protein they give you here, you end up depressed in here because the mineralization sucks so bad.
00:28:55.000 Also, being locked in a fucking cage for 21 hours a day is going to help, it's going to take a bite out of your self-esteem.
00:29:02.000 Yeah, it takes a bite.
00:29:05.000 I realized after a while, because I got through it for like a year, maybe 14 months, just on brute strength.
00:29:12.000 But I realized a lot of it's just the nutrition.
00:29:16.000 It really, nutrition is a huge part of your serotonin levels, and I usually eat really well.
00:29:22.000 So that was a big part of it for me.
00:29:24.000 Okay, so we had Fox News at 4.30.
00:29:27.000 For about three hours, we're sitting there watching it, having some bread.
00:29:30.000 The other girls wake up.
00:29:31.000 We all get our meds.
00:29:34.000 I usually write the news, the news report to Damon at that time because he doesn't get news over in the men's unit.
00:29:42.000 They don't get the remote on that side, so he doesn't ever get the news.
00:29:46.000 So I usually write out for him what's going on.
00:29:48.000 So you're allowed to write to him?
00:29:48.000 Oh, that's cool.
00:29:50.000 Yeah, so I can write to him.
00:29:51.000 So I usually just give him a news report or something.
00:29:53.000 It's your husband Damien, folks at home.
00:29:56.000 Yeah, so I give him the news.
00:29:58.000 And then after that, you know, whatever's going on for the day, our tier schedule varies.
00:30:04.000 So some days we're out in the afternoon, some days we're out in the morning.
00:30:08.000 So whenever they let us out, it's when they let us out.
00:30:10.000 And when you say let out, you don't mean running around in a field picking days out.
00:30:15.000 When I say let out, I mean they open my cell door.
00:30:18.000 And so out consists of a hallway that's in front of my cell door that runs the length of all the cells and encompasses that hallway where our two phones, our showers are.
00:30:31.000 And then we have a little common day room.
00:30:34.000 So there's two hallways that have our cells and have, so it has the east side and the west side.
00:30:40.000 And then we have our common day room area.
00:30:42.000 And that's where we have our water cigot.
00:30:44.000 And we have some tables that if we want to sit down and play chess or whatever.
00:30:49.000 Play chess?
00:30:50.000 And chess.
00:30:51.000 I taught the girls how to play chess.
00:30:53.000 Oh, cool.
00:30:54.000 So do you have anyone there that's within like, say, 10 points or 20 points of your IQ?
00:31:02.000 I mean, I don't know if there's an IQ test here, but, you know, I taught the girls how to play chess, so at least I have chess partners.
00:31:07.000 So it's like Shawshank Redemption over here.
00:31:10.000 But is there like a, like, because in male prisons, I'm told that after a little while, you get to your crew, and it's your people.
00:31:17.000 Like, I imagine I would be with the sort of goofballs.
00:31:23.000 Well, there's only six or seven of us on this side.
00:31:28.000 And then the girls who are on the west side, they actually, we don't congregate because they're considered to be the max girls.
00:31:34.000 When our side's open to the day room, their side's technically closed because they're the prison girls. 0.99
00:31:39.000 So they're high points.
00:31:40.000 So we're not allowed to actually congregate with them, but we talk to them through the gate and we get them water and vice versa.
00:31:46.000 So technically we're protected custody and technically they're prison girls.
00:31:50.000 So we're not supposed to actually interact, but we talk to each other clearly.
00:31:55.000 Sweet.
00:31:56.000 Yeah, so we sign each other's cards and, you know, we're friendly.
00:31:59.000 And so, you know, we chit-chat, but we're not supposed to be like hanging out together in the day room.
00:32:07.000 Because in theory, they're not supposed to really hang out with us.
00:32:11.000 Because in prison, protective custody and high points aren't supposed to hang out with each other.
00:32:15.000 But that's not how it is in real life.
00:32:17.000 But there's not enough of us to have like real crews.
00:32:20.000 So we all just kind of hang out together.
00:32:23.000 Okay.
00:32:25.000 And activities include TV, chess, anything else?
00:32:29.000 Like, what are the women like there? 1.00
00:32:31.000 they don't sound very violent.
00:32:34.000 No.
00:32:35.000 No, it's not I mean it's not a violent environment.
00:32:37.000 I mean, you know, the women's side generally aren't. 1.00
00:32:40.000 It's not like men's jail or men's prison.
00:32:43.000 And also in jail, I mean, you get, you know, these are people who are awaiting trial.
00:32:48.000 So if you get in fights or whatever, that reflects very poorly on your case.
00:32:53.000 Right, right.
00:32:55.000 So.
00:32:56.000 What's a typical charge for these women? 1.00
00:32:58.000 I'm sure yours aren't.
00:33:02.000 No, but PC charges, you know, usually they're kid cases.
00:33:08.000 So it might involve the death of a child.
00:33:10.000 It might involve something to do with children.
00:33:14.000 It might involve some of them, you know, it could be that they're related to a cop.
00:33:20.000 It might involve killing cop, might involve something like that.
00:33:25.000 Or it might involve, you know, like over here, not so much.
00:33:28.000 I'm trying to think of, but usually PCs are usually related to a child or related to something with cops.
00:33:35.000 The Mac scrolls, they're usually just high point scrolls that either have gang connections or they're girls who've been to prison multiple times. 1.00
00:33:43.000 For what?
00:33:46.000 What do you mean?
00:33:47.000 When you say they've been to prisons multiple times, like for being a lookout for drugs or like what does gang connections mean?
00:33:52.000 Just being in a gang is a crime?
00:33:55.000 No, but like let's say like GTA, multiple drug busts, you know, kidnapping, assault with a deadly weapon, you know, might have gotten involved, you know, assault, multiple assault charges, stuff like that.
00:34:16.000 Sounds pretty benign.
00:34:19.000 Yeah, I mean, you know, all things being equal, not necessarily murder, but, you know, maybe manslaughter, something like that.
00:34:28.000 So now you're lounging around in the day, and then chow time, lunchtime, is that in a cafeteria?
00:34:36.000 No, they serve us in our room.
00:34:38.000 Objective custody max girls usually don't go eat in a chow hall because so we have to be segmented. 1.00
00:34:45.000 So we eat in our rooms in ourselves.
00:34:47.000 And then now because of COVID, everybody has to eat in ourselves anyway.
00:34:50.000 And then after lunch, you've already had your three hours, I guess.
00:34:54.000 You're not allowed back out again?
00:34:56.000 Yeah, so it depends.
00:34:57.000 Like right now, so it's actually we're in a pretty good spot because the girls up in prison, we're told the prisoners have it really bad because everybody's stuck in their rooms.
00:35:06.000 Usually they're allowed to move about their facilities, but everybody's in lockdown.
00:35:12.000 So usually prisoners live eight to a room and they're allowed to move around.
00:35:18.000 Like they have classes or whatever they're doing, jobs, stuff like that.
00:35:24.000 But right now, everybody's stuck inside their room.
00:35:29.000 Upstairs here, their dormitory, and they kind of have everything they need in their room.
00:35:34.000 They're usually, the doors are open for like six hours a day.
00:35:37.000 They're in lockdown.
00:35:38.000 I guess they're in quarantine upstairs right now, as it is.
00:35:42.000 So they're not happy about that.
00:35:45.000 But yeah, so here they've been letting us out actually a little bit more.
00:35:49.000 We've been out for like five, six hours a day sometimes.
00:35:53.000 So it's been kind of nice.
00:35:54.000 Yeah.
00:35:55.000 So when you get back in and if you're not allowed out again and say you've got another five hours before you're going to get tired, what are you doing now?
00:36:04.000 I just have lots of books to read.
00:36:06.000 I've had a lot of time to, it's been great, actually.
00:36:09.000 I've read a lot of Russian literature.
00:36:12.000 I've reviewed the book.
00:36:12.000 Like what?
00:36:13.000 Oh, you're reading the Gulag Archipelago, right?
00:36:16.000 Gulag Archipelago.
00:36:17.000 I read War and Peace, which was great.
00:36:19.000 I had time to read War and Peace finally.
00:36:22.000 And Anna Karenina.
00:36:23.000 I'm reading a book on World War II right now that somebody just sent me, which is awesome.
00:36:29.000 I read most of Vonnegut's work in my time in here.
00:36:34.000 How long have you been in there for?
00:36:36.000 18 months.
00:36:39.000 Jesus Christ.
00:36:41.000 Yeah.
00:36:43.000 Yep.
00:36:44.000 You know, I read Machiavelli's work.
00:36:47.000 If you haven't read the discourses, you know, if you look at society right now, everything makes sense because we're in anarchy, but anarchy follows democracy, right?
00:36:58.000 So everybody talks about how America is a republic.
00:37:02.000 But, you know, Machiavelli talks about this and he's really clear.
00:37:05.000 A republic is the merger of a monarchy, an aristocracy, and a democracy.
00:37:12.000 And that makes sense.
00:37:13.000 So the cycles of government are anarchy becomes a principality, principalities become monarchies, monarchies become corrupt.
00:37:23.000 And eventually, aristocracies will then overthrow monarchies.
00:37:29.000 So rich guys, you know, say, fuck this guy and his, you know, corrupt kid.
00:37:33.000 They take over.
00:37:36.000 Those oligarchies become corrupt.
00:37:38.000 You know, the people overthrow them.
00:37:41.000 They become corrupt and then anarchies take over.
00:37:44.000 So a more perfect government is a republic.
00:37:47.000 A republic says, okay, we all have to work together.
00:37:51.000 We're going to merge these.
00:37:52.000 We're going to make all of these people's money dependent on one another.
00:37:57.000 And that's really what a republic is.
00:37:59.000 And I think people don't like to talk about it in those terms because when the American Republic was formed, we didn't like to think about the president as a king and Congress as an oligarch.
00:38:11.000 That's really what it is.
00:38:13.000 The problem is when we went to universal suffrage, when we started allowing people to vote who do not have a pecuniary interest in this government, basically when you have non-taxpayers voting, you start to have a democracy.
00:38:27.000 And that's what we have right now.
00:38:28.000 So you have these fucking people who are basically do-nothing assholes who have been voting.
00:38:36.000 And that's like most Democrats at this point.
00:38:38.000 Yeah.
00:38:39.000 That's why Obama was elected.
00:38:41.000 These are fucking losers.
00:38:43.000 They are dependent class fucking losers, non-taxpaying pieces of shit, who are draining our treasury. 1.00
00:38:51.000 And they have been voting to drain the treasury, right?
00:38:55.000 So this, like basically, since, I don't know, Obama's administration, it has pushed our government into full democracy.
00:39:04.000 And they are the same people who are now pushing our government into full anarchy.
00:39:08.000 It's in the discourses.
00:39:10.000 If you read Machiavelli's The Discourses, which I just read in my fucking jail cell, then all of a sudden everything that's happening right now makes sense.
00:39:18.000 Like, look at that.
00:39:20.000 Yeah.
00:39:20.000 You have one minute left.
00:39:22.000 So that, like, literally, like, it's in, it's in our history book.
00:39:27.000 There it is.
00:39:28.000 It's amazing how history repeats itself.
00:39:31.000 Well, Mercedes, what can we do to help?
00:39:34.000 You can write me letters.
00:39:36.000 I love you guys.
00:39:38.000 I'm sorry the world's going to shit.
00:39:40.000 Write me letters.
00:39:41.000 Energy accepted.
00:39:43.000 Yeah, I'm sorry the world's going to shit.
00:39:45.000 I'm rooting for all of you while I'm in my jail cell.
00:39:48.000 I think of you guys all the time, and I love all of you.
00:39:51.000 Thanks, Mercedes.
00:39:52.000 Well, I know that they've taken everything from you, but don't let the bastards take away your will to fight.
00:39:58.000 They can take my life, but they will never take our freedom.
00:40:03.000 I love you all.
00:40:04.000 Thanks, Mercedes.
00:40:05.000 Bye.
00:40:06.000 Bye.
00:40:10.000 Well, if I would have listened to what Mommy and Papa said, I wouldn't have to do it.
00:40:15.000 Um, yeah.
00:40:17.000 I know people come to these shows like this, like Rush Limbaugh and Tucker Carlson, they know exactly what their opinion is.
00:40:23.000 They tell you the story, and it's all figured out for you.
00:40:26.000 This show is pretty open-ended.
00:40:29.000 She's our friend.
00:40:30.000 I don't think she did it.
00:40:32.000 But we're allowing for that 2% chance that she's guilty.
00:40:36.000 Which is obviously the most horrific thing imaginable.
00:40:40.000 Worse than murder, I think.
00:40:45.000 All right.
00:40:45.000 Shall we check out the mail B?
00:40:50.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
00:40:54.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mail back.
00:41:00.000 Let me touch it.
00:41:04.000 This is a gay email. 0.92
00:41:07.000 Gav, my dad died unexpectedly three years ago when I was 19.
00:41:11.000 That's fucking rough, dude.
00:41:12.000 What a terrible time.
00:41:14.000 In the year or so after that, I became a depressed college pothead with very little ambition.
00:41:18.000 Makes sense.
00:41:19.000 I was three years into a relationship, but was too afraid to commit and was content with wasting my girlfriend's time indefinitely.
00:41:25.000 She was 24 at the time.
00:41:26.000 Then I discovered your stuff.
00:41:29.000 I'm 22 now.
00:41:31.000 I married her this January.
00:41:32.000 Phew.
00:41:33.000 We bought a house in February and I knocked her up in May. 1.00
00:41:36.000 This is the happiest I've ever been.
00:41:37.000 You have remained a big influence on me throughout it all.
00:41:40.000 I hope many more guys will do what I did and listen to what you're screaming.
00:41:44.000 Your fatherhood show is right on time.
00:41:46.000 On Saturday, we found out that the baby is a girl.
00:41:48.000 Her middle name is going to be Gavin.
00:41:50.000 Just kidding about the name.
00:41:51.000 That would be retarded. 1.00
00:41:54.000 Well, that's a nice letter.
00:41:56.000 Yeah, like, you know, I fucked hundreds of chicks, and what did I gain from that?
00:42:02.000 It's like partying, you know, you do tons of Coke and pot and mushrooms and acid, and then you drink bottles and bottles of booze and fucking a million beers.
00:42:15.000 You get it yet?
00:42:18.000 You know?
00:42:20.000 It's not even like sports, too, where you get better and better, and then you're in a new league, and then you might become a pro.
00:42:28.000 And being good at it, if you will.
00:42:29.000 It's just like playing the same stick ball in the street again and again and again and again.
00:42:34.000 I understand that you want to fuck around.
00:42:38.000 I think you'd be happier if you married your first love, but that's a tough sell with today's youth.
00:42:47.000 But if you started getting wasted at 14, 15, 16, surely after 10 years or even five years, have you not got the idea?
00:42:56.000 And vaginas and tits and stuff, there's not that much, like tits have lots of different sizes. 1.00
00:43:01.000 But as far as like sex goes, you know your type.
00:43:05.000 You know what you're attracted to.
00:43:08.000 I'm sure after three or four chicks, you kind of get the idea.
00:43:11.000 That's true.
00:43:13.000 And then after your party phase, you move to the dad phase.
00:43:17.000 And wow.
00:43:23.000 It's another world, my friends.
00:43:25.000 Total, total, it's literally, oh, I shouldn't say literally.
00:43:28.000 Yeah, I can say literally.
00:43:30.000 It's literally a different world.
00:43:32.000 I'm a totally different person.
00:43:34.000 I look back on before I had kids and I go, oh, cute.
00:43:38.000 You think you're a person?
00:43:41.000 Yes, you are.
00:43:42.000 Oh, look, you put up shelves in your room and you think that's a thing.
00:43:46.000 You think you've accomplished something good.
00:43:50.000 My son's on a cover of a magazine.
00:43:55.000 Look up the Dharman one of that where it's a football. 1.00
00:44:00.000 It's the exact same video.
00:44:03.000 The exact same script.
00:44:07.000 No, there was a repeat of a different one with the parking spot.
00:44:10.000 Remember that?
00:44:11.000 Look.
00:44:13.000 Got a surprise for you, buddy.
00:44:13.000 Yeah.
00:44:17.000 Hey, guys, it's Dar.
00:44:18.000 The video you're about to watch.
00:44:20.000 Hey, guys, I look like one of those drawings where when you turn it upside down, it's also a face.
00:44:25.000 And make sure to stay till the end.
00:44:26.000 I'm 180 degrees.
00:44:28.000 Here's my football from my last game.
00:44:33.000 Again, I wasn't able to go all the way.
00:44:36.000 You mean your last game?
00:44:38.000 Listen to how bad this actor is.
00:44:39.000 He goes, the way you say that line is, you go, I wasn't able to go all the way.
00:44:44.000 Maybe you can.
00:44:45.000 But he says, I wasn't able to go all the way.
00:44:48.000 Maybe he talks late.
00:44:50.000 Scary Perry in Windy City Heat.
00:44:52.000 He reads the script and thinks just randomizing how he says it is acting.
00:44:57.000 But luckily, I have you.
00:44:59.000 I wasn't able to go all the way.
00:44:59.000 No, go back.
00:45:02.000 But luckily, I have you to finish what I wasn't able to.
00:45:10.000 I think it's so easy.
00:45:10.000 Just put pauses.
00:45:12.000 And to see someone fuck it up, it's like watching an adult try to ride a bicycle and fall off.
00:45:12.000 Just put pauses.
00:45:19.000 Oh, thanks.
00:45:20.000 Dad.
00:45:21.000 And sweetie.
00:45:22.000 All right, that's the name.
00:45:23.000 I didn't forget about you.
00:45:24.000 I got you a magazine about makeup.
00:45:27.000 Hey, Gavin, that gas can thing.
00:45:30.000 It's an easy fix.
00:45:31.000 It's called a sure can, and you can get them online.
00:45:34.000 All right, thank you.
00:45:35.000 Sure can.
00:45:38.000 I think I got a good letter in my normal box.
00:45:42.000 That made me feel like I have a vagina when I said that. 1.00
00:45:45.000 That's your normal box?
00:45:48.000 That looks pretty cool.
00:45:55.000 This one was kind of interesting.
00:45:56.000 I guess off to 42.
00:45:57.000 Please only send letters to the mailbag, folks.
00:46:01.000 It's all right.
00:46:05.000 I'm sending you that one.
00:46:07.000 This one guy, Lars.
00:46:09.000 I actually know this dude.
00:46:11.000 He's a proud boy.
00:46:16.000 Here's one from Zach.
00:46:17.000 Hey, man, not even trying to get this on the mailbag, but I got to say this to you personally.
00:46:20.000 Sophia's brilliant, especially for her love her show. 0.75
00:46:22.000 I love her mind, and I'm probably a good two decades older than her.
00:46:25.000 That's impressive as it's hard to get me to listen online.
00:46:29.000 I only suggest if you have any proclivity to do so, just to tell her to slow down and pronounce a little more.
00:46:36.000 You mean enunciate or pronounce?
00:46:40.000 Okay, so that's not a very good letter at all.
00:46:42.000 What was the letter I was looking for?
00:46:48.000 Dear Gavin, how can Ryan work as a co-host and producer of a political humor internet talk show and deliberately avoid following politics outside of his 70 minutes on the show each day?
00:46:58.000 It would be like the commentators at the UFC just showing up for work and doing it all impromptu.
00:47:02.000 It's fucking retarded. 1.00
00:47:04.000 No, it's like their producers doing that impromptu.
00:47:09.000 I'm sure their tech could not watch sports.
00:47:15.000 Okay.
00:47:16.000 I mean, I do watch politics and get involved.
00:47:16.000 I do watch politics.
00:47:20.000 You get involved?
00:47:21.000 I get involved.
00:47:22.000 I tweet or whatever.
00:47:24.000 You tweet a lot?
00:47:26.000 Not really.
00:47:29.000 I'm lying.
00:47:30.000 City lie.
00:47:32.000 I get involved.
00:47:34.000 Here we go.
00:47:35.000 Oh, this is the letter I was looking for.
00:47:37.000 Yeah.
00:47:38.000 Some chick was trying to arrest someone, and the guy just grabbed her and put her in the headlock, and then those five teenagers had to go in and save her.
00:47:44.000 In other words, she's useless and shouldn't be doing anything. 0.96
00:47:50.000 Here's a letter I was looking for.
00:47:52.000 Hey, Gavin, how much of being in a relationship is being your true self, and how much of it is trying to fulfill your woman's needs?
00:47:58.000 For example, in my current relationship, my girlfriend instigates everything.
00:48:01.000 She always texts first, asks me when I'm free, etc.
00:48:05.000 Everything we do is on my terms, and she clears her schedule for me.
00:48:09.000 She's a little needy, but it feels great to finally not be doing the dude chasing and be a chill dude.
00:48:14.000 Should this game, where she's chasing me, continue for the entire relationship?
00:48:19.000 Sometimes I have the urge to text her, but I don't want her to gain this illusional advantage.
00:48:24.000 I feel as if too much advice from Patrice O'Neill has fucked me over because everything I do in my relationship is calculated and it's working, but I'm not giving her my complete self.
00:48:33.000 Do you still calculate what moves you'll do with your wife not to turn her off?
00:48:36.000 Are you still trying to impress her?
00:48:38.000 Thanks, legend.
00:48:40.000 Yes.
00:48:42.000 You know, you talk to a lot of people about relationships and they go, just be yourself.
00:48:47.000 No, don't be yourself.
00:48:49.000 Never be yourself.
00:48:51.000 Always be playing the upper hand.
00:48:55.000 Even in bed, sexually.
00:48:57.000 Like, never get tied up, you pussy. 1.00
00:49:00.000 You tie her up.
00:49:02.000 You never, you never, ever let her have the upper hand.
00:49:06.000 I've known my wife for 20 years, been married for 15.
00:49:06.000 I've been married.
00:49:09.000 I would never, if I, here's the analogy I always use.
00:49:12.000 You're running down the street with a chocolate cake, right?
00:49:14.000 You fall and trip.
00:49:15.000 Your face goes in the chocolate cake.
00:49:18.000 You have a complete chocolate face.
00:49:20.000 That's funny.
00:49:21.000 It's probably racist in this day and age.
00:49:23.000 But you should not tell her that.
00:49:29.000 Never.
00:49:30.000 I don't think you should tell your kids that.
00:49:33.000 I'm not sure about that.
00:49:34.000 That's kind of a different relationship.
00:49:35.000 But yeah, you'd never tell your wife that story.
00:49:38.000 My father-in-law was coming down these icy steps and he did a big cosmic silly fall.
00:49:44.000 And he said, don't tell his wife or my wife about that.
00:49:49.000 And I went, yeah, that's interesting.
00:49:51.000 You've been married for like 40 years and you're still never giving them the upper hand.
00:49:57.000 Now, that doesn't mean you can never relax.
00:50:00.000 Once things are established, like you're going out to dinner, you can basically be yourself, sort of, but it's like being a corrections officer, actually.
00:50:12.000 You can talk to the inmates and shit, but they have to always know that you call the shots and you can lock them up at any given time.
00:50:19.000 And if they get too lippy, you've got to put them back in line.
00:50:22.000 And with your wife, or your girlfriend, if she starts talking back and being a snarky bitch, you have to say, whoa, whoa, watch your tone. 0.99
00:50:30.000 Who do you think you're talking to?
00:50:32.000 You come across as a bitch. 1.00
00:50:37.000 Sorry.
00:50:38.000 So yeah, don't fart around her.
00:50:41.000 Don't tell her.
00:50:42.000 Don't be weak.
00:50:43.000 You can cry like this.
00:50:49.000 Soldiers tear.
00:50:50.000 Yeah, if you're watching a movie and a kid dies or something, I don't think that's a problem.
00:50:55.000 But you can never ugly cry or you can never cry about things like you didn't get a job or you're jealous.
00:51:03.000 Like never show her any of the of the seven deadly sins.
00:51:07.000 Never show her that you're jealous of someone or never say you're never imply you're intimidated by someone.
00:51:13.000 If someone scares you, shut your mouth about it.
00:51:15.000 That's really what I'm getting at here is if you want to be weak, go be weak with your fucking buddies.
00:51:21.000 Don't tell her anything.
00:51:24.000 All right, that's it.
00:51:26.000 Because this is a special app, I don't think we have the final video.
00:51:32.000 But I'll send it to you now.
00:51:33.000 It's my new favorite thing, which is car fights.
00:51:37.000 Now you know this is one of the oldest symbols.
00:51:43.000 Um...
00:51:46.000 I get it, you know, they say like with drugs, you keep meeting more and more.
00:51:46.000 I don't know.
00:51:50.000 Like with heroin, you start with just snorting it.
00:51:52.000 Next thing you know, you're shooting up $300 worth a day.
00:51:54.000 I'm that way with street fights.
00:51:57.000 I know I'm not satisfied with two people fighting.
00:51:59.000 If they see two people fighting on the street, there has to be a knockout, or I'm pissed.
00:52:03.000 But now I'm like, fists, why don't you get in your cars and have a good, old-fashioned car fight like this?
00:52:13.000 Oh my god.
00:52:17.000 Imagine how freaked out you'd be if you were in the truck.
00:52:19.000 Like, what the fuck is this person doing?
00:52:27.000 He's good at it.
00:52:29.000 Like, you caught him.
00:52:32.000 Yeah, just get the hell out of there, dude.
00:52:37.000 Ah, short and sweet.
00:52:40.000 So that is our very disturbing episode of cripplingly serious allegations to our friend Mercedes Carrera.
00:52:50.000 And we hope everything works.
00:52:59.000 And if you feel uncomfortable with defending someone before they've had a trial and giving them the benefit of the doubt, then you're making a big mistake.
00:53:11.000 You have to, That's really the secret to being a grown-up is allowing yourself to be uncomfortable, to confront people and to make uncomfortable decisions no matter what.