Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S02E94 - THIS SHOW SUCKS

00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.

00:00:20.000 *music*

00:00:34.000 Did you fuck up?

00:00:36.000 I heard the song twice.

00:00:36.000 No.

00:00:39.000 No, no, that's in the song.

00:00:40.000 Oh, yeah.

00:00:42.000 That was Land of the Loops.

00:00:44.000 Who's that guy again?

00:00:47.000 Alan Sutherland.

00:00:51.000 He's a dude really popular in Seattle.

00:00:54.000 When I was sort of a young man and Vice was still in Montreal, that's the kind of music we listened to.

00:01:03.000 Samples.

00:01:05.000 And it would just be a guy on a sampler, like Alan Sutherland from Land of the Loops, just doom, doom, doom, badoon.

00:01:10.000 He had some, I think his wife would play the bass, and they would just loop samples, and that's all you listened to.

00:01:16.000 It was a really weird time.

00:01:18.000 You just, and you had, all the songs sound pretty darn similar.

00:01:22.000 And you just listen to these samples, and then some guy sitting with an 808 just looping beats, boom, boom, boom, badoon, badoon.

00:01:29.000 With little strange samples.

00:01:30.000 There he is.

00:01:31.000 Strange samples from movies.

00:01:36.000 Slabco was a record label.

00:01:38.000 You know who else was like that?

00:01:39.000 This guy my age, Suck Lord.

00:01:42.000 He did this album called Star Wars Break Beats.

00:01:46.000 That was, yeah, that's him.

00:01:48.000 He's that guy's so fucking New York.

00:01:50.000 It's insane.

00:01:51.000 He's still, he has a show out now where he's still obsessed with Star Wars.

00:01:56.000 And he sits and talks.

00:01:57.000 He's 49 years old.

00:01:59.000 And he makes Star Wars toys, bootleg Star Wars toys, and just talks on his YouTube channel about Star Wars and fucking...

00:02:07.000 I'll tell you what, The Last Great Jedi would...

00:02:12.000 That was The Last Great Jedi.

00:02:14.000 Ever since then, you know, it's been a fucking shit show. 0.69

00:02:18.000 Can you hear him?

00:02:19.000 2004.

00:02:20.000 I made 48 of them, and I have two left.

00:02:22.000 The rest of them are 2004.

00:02:25.000 I think there's a few floating around in a while, but I sold this for 20 bucks when it first came out.

00:02:32.000 And it took me about a year to get rid of all of them.

00:02:34.000 And the last one, No, he lives in Chinatown with his mom, I think.

00:02:39.000 You fucking believe that.

00:02:40.000 He's a great guy.

00:02:41.000 But Star Wars Breakbeats, I listen to it now and I go, how did I sit and listen to this fucking terrible album so much?

00:02:49.000 It's just like don't don't bounce down like disco music and then just Obi-Wan Kenobi, you're our only hope.

00:02:56.000 What's going on with my hair there?

00:03:00.000 Is there a swish? 1.00

00:03:04.000 Remember Jimmy Fallon?

00:03:06.000 He rubbed Donald Trump's hair and he was accused of humanizing him?

00:03:11.000 And they say that's why he was elected.

00:03:13.000 And instead of Jimmy Fallon just laughing that off, he was really messed up by it and took some time off to think about what he had done.

00:03:21.000 They had a big story about it in New York Magazine.

00:03:23.000 They have him sitting on top of the Radio City Music Hall sign like this.

00:03:28.000 Just thinking about everything he'd done.

00:03:30.000 All right, so that's two assignments that you're letting drift by.

00:03:35.000 Yeah, that's the incident.

00:03:36.000 He fails to take action after Donald Trump tells him to be a man.

00:03:41.000 Over here it does.

00:03:43.000 Wait, wait, go back.

00:03:44.000 My brain's not working great today.

00:03:45.000 Jimmy Fallon takes action after Donald Trump tells him to be a man.

00:03:48.000 Oh, yeah.

00:03:48.000 Oh, cool.

00:03:49.000 Trump came down.

00:03:50.000 Trump made fun of him for this.

00:03:51.000 Yeah.

00:03:51.000 He said, be a man, Jimmy.

00:03:53.000 Get over it, Jim.

00:03:54.000 Yeah, Jimmy.

00:03:55.000 You touching Trump's hair did not get him elected.

00:03:59.000 The Midwest got him elected.

00:04:01.000 Fallon choked up during a podcast last week talking about the criticism he received for tossling Mr. Trump's hair in September 2016.

00:04:10.000 You go, you go, all right, we get it.

00:04:13.000 I heard you.

00:04:14.000 You made me feel bad.

00:04:15.000 So now what?

00:04:16.000 Are you happy?

00:04:17.000 I'm depressed.

00:04:18.000 You want to push me more?

00:04:19.000 What do you want me to do?

00:04:20.000 I know.

00:04:21.000 I mean, you want me to kill myself?

00:04:22.000 What would make you happy?

00:04:24.000 Yeah.

00:04:24.000 Get over it.

00:04:25.000 Oh, my God.

00:04:25.000 Kill yourself.

00:04:27.000 Kill yourself for getting drunk.

00:04:29.000 Anyway, that's enough.

00:04:30.000 But find Star Wars breakbeats, because I want people to hear how shitty the music was in the late 90s.

00:04:36.000 Trials of a Jedi? 0.73

00:04:37.000 Any of them.

00:04:38.000 The Force is with you, young Skywalker.

00:04:38.000 They're all the same.

00:04:40.000 The Force is with you.

00:04:47.000 This looks like this for hours.

00:04:49.000 It's like the 90s was just background music.

00:04:52.000 I think it's because we were high.

00:04:54.000 We were on GHB and MDMA, and music was just like dancing around in the background while you made out with some lesbian. 0.99

00:05:04.000 Girl Talk, too.

00:05:05.000 That was pretty big.

00:05:06.000 No, Girl Talk's different.

00:05:08.000 They do mashups.

00:05:09.000 That's mashups.

00:05:09.000 That's more exciting.

00:05:10.000 In fact, if you're skiing or snowboarding or something, you're listening to music, I find mashups are pretty much the funnest thing to listen to.

00:05:18.000 They're pretty cool.

00:05:19.000 They're pretty dope.

00:05:20.000 Pretty dope.

00:05:21.000 It's not cool, but no one can hear that you're listening to a mashup of like EPMD and Mantronic or something.

00:05:31.000 Anyway, so that's enough music talk.

00:05:33.000 I'm kind of intimidated, by the way, because yesterday's show was so good that I know we can't match it.

00:05:37.000 So I would get your hopes low for this.

00:05:40.000 In fact, the best part of today's show is just going to be tying up loose ends from yesterday's show because this episode is going to be is well, see, it's already I'm stuttering.

00:05:50.000 It will pale in comparison to yesterday's masterclass.

00:05:54.000 But one thing I forgot to tell you, remember I told you I got kicked out of the house of Burgess?

00:05:58.000 Yeah.

00:05:59.000 By the way, my life's too interesting for the suburbs.

00:06:02.000 I keep telling people stories at my gym, I mean at my gym, at my local bar, and then none of them believe me.

00:06:08.000 They didn't believe me that I got kicked out of the house of Burgess.

00:06:11.000 They don't believe me about the kettlebell.

00:06:12.000 I had to show them a picture of my dick to show them the bruise.

00:06:16.000 I'm like, I'll give you $1,000 for every lie I tell.

00:06:20.000 Still, no, he's lying.

00:06:21.000 That's bullshit.

00:06:22.000 Isn't that weird?

00:06:24.000 All right.

00:06:25.000 Sorry, I'm so scintillating.

00:06:27.000 But here's a crazy thing.

00:06:30.000 At Colonial Williamsburg, there's a lot of black people because we're in the South.

00:06:34.000 Virginia considers itself the South.

00:06:36.000 Giant Confederate flag we saw off the highway that was as big as this studio.

00:06:43.000 And if you're black in 1612, you're a slave or a toad. 0.99

00:06:51.000 So the black people you see there are slaves. 0.95

00:06:53.000 They're owned by someone else.

00:06:55.000 So those are all just facts, right?

00:06:57.000 As far as the role-playing goes.

00:06:59.000 But the weird part is, I think some of them get into that zone a little bit and start acting like slaves.

00:07:07.000 Not the carriage driver we had.

00:07:09.000 The one who told me about his dumb dad who turned down 40 grand for a $25,000 car.

00:07:14.000 But like that woman who said, good day to you, and then curtsied away.

00:07:19.000 So when I got kicked out, there was a man, an old black man, a slave that was tending to the fires outside, keeping the fires burning. 1.00

00:07:27.000 And so I walk out and I go, I just got kicked out of there.

00:07:31.000 And he goes, oh, I see.

00:07:33.000 Trouble?

00:07:34.000 No, he didn't even say trouble.

00:07:35.000 He said, oh, that can't be good.

00:07:36.000 And I go, yeah, just got thrown out.

00:07:39.000 Now, if you're a normal person who's not a slave, you go, wait, what?

00:07:45.000 What happened?

00:07:45.000 What were you doing?

00:07:46.000 Holy shit, that's crazy.

00:07:48.000 I worked here for six years.

00:07:49.000 I've never heard of anyone getting kicked out of the courtroom before.

00:07:53.000 You're mental.

00:07:53.000 What's your name?

00:07:54.000 That would be the normal response.

00:07:56.000 But a slave response would just be, oh, that's something.

00:08:02.000 And then he goes to the supervisor and goes, yeah, we got a problem here.

00:08:06.000 Looks like someone didn't like the courtroom.

00:08:10.000 So you really did?

00:08:11.000 What are you doing?

00:08:12.000 This is Colonial Williamsburg.

00:08:14.000 Oh.

00:08:15.000 Okay.

00:08:17.000 No, it's not.

00:08:21.000 That's the visitor center at the hotel to get to the town of Colonial Williamsburg.

00:08:27.000 That's the hotel we stayed at.

00:08:28.000 Oh, nice.

00:08:30.000 But he told us graphic.

00:08:30.000 Thanks for watching.

00:08:32.000 Well, basically, he wasn't treating his job like a normal person.

00:08:37.000 He was being a snitch.

00:08:38.000 And it was funny because in the courtroom, this black woman came up and she was a slave owned by the guy on trial and she ratted him out.

00:08:48.000 So they're ratting people out left and right, left and right.

00:08:52.000 So then this woman comes up to me and she goes, I understand that you had a problem with our presentation.

00:08:59.000 And I said, no, it was funny.

00:09:00.000 It's comedy.

00:09:01.000 It was a good joke.

00:09:02.000 Everyone laughed.

00:09:03.000 And she goes, oh, okay.

00:09:06.000 You got to remember when you get out there into the wild, a lot of people aren't into comedy.

00:09:12.000 Some people don't have it at all in their lives.

00:09:12.000 Yeah.

00:09:15.000 Like at home, they watch TV.

00:09:17.000 They don't watch comedy.

00:09:19.000 They're just riffing doesn't exist to them.

00:09:21.000 It seems like a waste of time.

00:09:23.000 That's so weird to me.

00:09:24.000 Oh, here we go.

00:09:25.000 That's Colonial Williamsburg.

00:09:26.000 Yeah, I've had that before, too, where I just completely...

00:09:34.000 Oh, yeah, there was a guy at the edge of the bar at the cigar bar and he was like, I mean, you know, my team's doing so bad.

00:09:41.000 I'm going to commit Harikari. 0.99

00:09:43.000 And I said, sir, I'm very offended by that.

00:09:46.000 My dad died of Harikari.

00:09:48.000 And he just went.

00:09:50.000 I was like, I'll kill you right here and right now.

00:09:52.000 Yeah, no one's fallen on their sword in half a century.

00:09:56.000 It's called a fucking joke.

00:09:57.000 My God.

00:09:58.000 Jeez, Lily.

00:09:59.000 He'd even smile and be like, uh.

00:10:01.000 Also in yesterday's news, we were talking about that crazy chair, and our buddy Lars and some other viewers did the research and found us the chair.

00:10:13.000 It's a thing.

00:10:14.000 It's by an artist named Frank Gallo.

00:10:17.000 This is 1-2.

00:10:19.000 And there's one at the MoMA here in Midtown, New York.

00:10:23.000 You're up to 1-3, but we'll do it.

00:10:25.000 Has it got any pictures there?

00:10:29.000 There it is.

00:10:31.000 Hers was a little different, though, right?

00:10:33.000 I think hers was a black chair.

00:10:35.000 Well, I think that's just the contrast of the shot.

00:10:38.000 There it is.

00:10:40.000 What the fuck?

00:10:41.000 Someone bought that?

00:10:44.000 That's not a functioning chair, I would guess.

00:10:48.000 Well, would you want to sit on that?

00:10:49.000 No, that's uncomfortable.

00:10:50.000 I'd like to just sit on that and have a beer after a hard day's work.

00:10:54.000 Watch the news.

00:10:56.000 Get sciatica.

00:10:57.000 What a stupid bitch. 1.00

00:10:59.000 Who bought that?

00:11:00.000 Frank Gallo.

00:11:02.000 And the chick in the chair, to be frankly. 0.98

00:11:04.000 The chick in the chair is a stupid bitch, too. 1.00

00:11:06.000 To be frankly.

00:11:06.000 He's got weird tits.

00:11:08.000 There we go.

00:11:08.000 Let's see that.

00:11:12.000 How much is he going to do?

00:11:13.000 How much is it?

00:11:14.000 I don't know.

00:11:15.000 Why would they tell us?

00:11:17.000 A new medium for sculpture, reinforced plastics.

00:11:24.000 So weird.

00:11:25.000 Anyway.

00:11:26.000 And then there's drawings of it.

00:11:28.000 If you will.

00:11:29.000 And getting good at it, if you will.

00:11:31.000 Yeah, there's like an embossed little.

00:11:34.000 That's if you can't afford the chair.

00:11:35.000 We should get that.

00:11:36.000 Girl in a sling. 0.94

00:11:37.000 How much is that?

00:11:38.000 It's probably 40 bucks.

00:11:39.000 We should get that.

00:11:40.000 Let me see.

00:11:40.000 All right.

00:11:42.000 Also in the news, so that's done.

00:11:45.000 We're done talking about yesterday's show, right?

00:11:48.000 Yes.

00:11:49.000 Let's catch up on some clown world stuff.

00:11:49.000 Yes.

00:11:52.000 Joe Biden said the dumbest, weirdest thing about leg hairs and cockroaches.

00:11:56.000 He proved to America a couple days ago that he's not mentally fit to run a country.

00:12:02.000 He's not mentally fit to run his own campaign.

00:12:04.000 I don't think he's mentally fit to run down the block.

00:12:08.000 But someone managed to animate his crazy shit and make a little cartoon of it.

00:12:13.000 This is exactly what he said.

00:12:14.000 This is not someone doing a Joe Biden imitation.

00:12:17.000 And thank you to whoever was fast enough to animate this.

00:12:20.000 Nice work.

00:12:21.000 This is span.

00:12:23.000 I got hairy legs that turn that turn blonde in the sun.

00:12:31.000 And the kids used to come up and reach in the pool and rub my leg down so it was traded and then watched the hair come back up again.

00:12:39.000 They look at it.

00:12:40.000 So I learned about roaches.

00:12:41.000 I learned about kids jumping on my lap.

00:12:44.000 And I've loved kids jumping on my lap.

00:12:47.000 And by the way, I've learned about roaches?

00:12:50.000 Does he call kids cockroaches?

00:12:53.000 I think maybe there's a callback to an earlier thing.

00:12:56.000 Oh, thank you, Ryan.

00:12:57.000 But what was the earlier thing?

00:12:59.000 What could the earlier thing possibly be?

00:13:00.000 I would love context for that.

00:13:02.000 Like, someone was asking about roaches, and he goes, Oh, believe me, I know about cockroaches.

00:13:06.000 Kids used to play with my leg hair.

00:13:08.000 No, that's not a cockroach thing.

00:13:10.000 You don't know about cockroaches, clearly.

00:13:13.000 Water bugs?

00:13:15.000 Maybe he called his kids water bugs when they were playing in the pool, and then he got confused and said roaches.

00:13:23.000 The other weird thing about that, too, is when he was trying to think of the word blonde, when you look at the actual video, he's going like this with his hand.

00:13:30.000 He says, I had hairy legs, and in the summer, my leg hairs would.

00:13:36.000 He starts going like this with his thumb.

00:13:38.000 My leg hairs would go, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nam, blonde.

00:13:44.000 Okay, wait.

00:13:45.000 Oh, okay.

00:13:46.000 They're referring to the speech of the person who introduced him and had mentioned those things.

00:13:50.000 Roaches and leg hair.

00:13:53.000 I'm willing to take that and believe that that's true, but I like when kids jump on my lap.

00:14:00.000 That context does not help.

00:14:01.000 Yeah, I know.

00:14:02.000 That context does not help.

00:14:03.000 So they said, don't be scared of roaches or if kids jump on your lap.

00:14:07.000 And then he talks about kids jumping on his lap and then says, I know about roaches.

00:14:11.000 So I'm sorry, sir.

00:14:13.000 Your context does not help one iota.

00:14:17.000 We young folks that was trying to understand the movement of life.

00:14:22.000 Where's your teeth?

00:14:23.000 Took Joe by the hangout, took him over to Riverside.

00:14:25.000 I told Joe, have a seat.

00:14:28.000 I said, now, if a roach come on you, if you get a matinee jar with some Kool-Aid in it, if the kids come up with sit in your lap, just smile and say, everything gonna be all right.

00:14:47.000 Right, we know, we know.

00:14:48.000 We knew the context, Joe.

00:14:49.000 You're still nuts.

00:14:50.000 I like when kids jump on my lap.

00:14:52.000 There is no need for that.

00:14:54.000 I like when kids jump on my lap.

00:14:57.000 I love it.

00:14:58.000 I don't.

00:14:59.000 Yeah, what?

00:15:00.000 Not anymore.

00:15:02.000 Why would you like that?

00:15:03.000 I remember Bill Burr has a whole bit about that.

00:15:04.000 He's like, I used to like kids.

00:15:06.000 Let's say a little drunk guy.

00:15:09.000 Like little drunk people, you know?

00:15:11.000 And then he said, but now you're just like, get away from me.

00:15:15.000 You don't want to get accused of pedophilia.

00:15:17.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:15:18.000 Dude, never be in a bathroom with just a kid, you know?

00:15:20.000 You know, my dad, we've been...

00:15:34.000 One, there's a place called Mama's Place on Mulberry Street in Little Italy.

00:15:38.000 I didn't do diddly in Little Italy before that.

00:15:42.000 And it's a really old-fashioned, it's just done like family servings.

00:15:46.000 They just serve you food and then you get a bill.

00:15:47.000 It's pretty fucking big.

00:15:49.000 But they have this stick that's stuck to the ceiling.

00:15:52.000 And when they pull on the stick, it looks like a cock and with balls. 0.71

00:15:56.000 And they pull on the stick and then the light bulb goes bing, bing, bing, bing.

00:15:59.000 And everyone goes, yay, penis, man.

00:16:03.000 And while we were sitting there, a cockroach crawled on his jacket.

00:16:07.000 Another time, totally different restaurant.

00:16:11.000 This is at Frank's on 3rd Avenue and like 4th Street.

00:16:19.000 Exact same story.

00:16:20.000 We're sitting there having our Noki cockroach crawls across his chest.

00:16:24.000 Unbelievable.

00:16:25.000 Isn't that fucking mental?

00:16:26.000 What are the odds?

00:16:26.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:16:28.000 It's never happened to me in any other environment in my life, anywhere in the world.

00:16:32.000 I've never seen, been in a restaurant and had a cockroach crawl on me or anyone I know.

00:16:36.000 Twice was my dad.

00:16:38.000 And at Italian restaurants.

00:16:40.000 Is it possible he's a fucking psycho that packs a roach with him when he goes out to get a discount?

00:16:44.000 Because we got a discount both times.

00:16:46.000 He usually feeds the roach, but he forgot that day.

00:16:49.000 And it's like, come on, dude, what the fuck?

00:16:50.000 Do I have to crawl up your blazer for this?

00:16:52.000 He's way too lazy for that.

00:16:55.000 Way too lazy for a pet roach.

00:16:58.000 That's a t-shirt.

00:16:59.000 I'm way too lazy for a pet roach.

00:17:02.000 Oh, shit.

00:17:04.000 We got a lot to talk about regarding racism today.

00:17:09.000 Today's a big race.

00:17:10.000 Lot of racist shit.

00:17:11.000 Lot of racist shit this year.

00:17:15.000 What was that gossip you were saying about Keith the cop over at Compound Media and Kevin Nealon?

00:17:20.000 Oh, yeah.

00:17:21.000 You know, Kevin Brennan.

00:17:22.000 Kevin Brennan.

00:17:23.000 Kevin Brennan, what the fuck?

00:17:25.000 Neil Brennan's brother.

00:17:26.000 Neil Brennan is the guy who wrote the Chappelle show, and he has an unsuccessful brother named Kevin, who I like, who's a total prick.

00:17:36.000 And he used to work with me at Compound Media.

00:17:39.000 Yeah.

00:17:40.000 But what's your interactions with him like?

00:17:41.000 Great.

00:17:42.000 I was on his show once because I don't like Neil Brennan.

00:17:45.000 Neil Brennan has a whole special about how he suffers from depression.

00:17:49.000 What?

00:17:50.000 You mean you were sad a couple times?

00:17:52.000 Fuck off.

00:17:52.000 Oh, yeah.

00:17:53.000 But that's his thing now.

00:17:54.000 And he talks like a cancer patient, like overcoming his illness.

00:18:00.000 So Kevin says, there's a lot of back and forth here, but I see the point.

00:18:08.000 And then Kevin Brennan, pretty much they're talking about compound stuff.

00:18:12.000 And then Kevin Brennan chimes in.

00:18:15.000 When I think wise business decisions, I think Keith the cop.

00:18:18.000 And so that's obviously a little slam.

00:18:20.000 And then he said, you should.

00:18:21.000 I didn't bring you back.

00:18:23.000 Oh, pretty good.

00:18:26.000 And then Kevin says, I don't blame Keith for being defensive after you ran compound meeting to the ground.

00:18:30.000 Now he expects OP to save the network after blah, blah, blah.

00:18:32.000 What's that gossip about?

00:18:34.000 Opie's going to come on?

00:18:35.000 They've always been talking about, I mean, Keith's always been like optimistic about making that, you know, happen.

00:18:40.000 You know, I was listening to Opie and Anthony the other day, and he really, it was a great combination.

00:18:45.000 He sucks.

00:18:46.000 He's a torpid sloth.

00:18:48.000 He's kind of a square, I guess.

00:18:50.000 He's a square.

00:18:50.000 He's not funny, but he's mashed potatoes.

00:18:53.000 And Anthony is steak.

00:18:55.000 And sometimes you get a lot of steak and you're just like, I'm kind of stuffed.

00:18:59.000 Sometimes you need bland mush.

00:19:02.000 The least flattering, flattering thing I've ever heard you say about.

00:19:05.000 To counteract.

00:19:06.000 To counteract the spice.

00:19:07.000 It's like rice.

00:19:09.000 It's like Robin Quivers.

00:19:10.000 Robin Quivers has never said anything funny once.

00:19:12.000 Absolutely.

00:19:13.000 In her entire life.

00:19:14.000 But I've listened to Stern Without Her there, and it just sort of goes off the rails.

00:19:19.000 He steers the ship.

00:19:20.000 I've heard Jimmy and Anthony shows, which sound like a dream come true, but there's just, you know, the producers have to actually chime in and start getting things going.

00:19:28.000 Opie had a total role.

00:19:30.000 And I think Opie allows Anthony to be more of a cocksucker.

00:19:34.000 So Anthony can really let his id out, if you will, getting id at it.

00:19:40.000 Getting good at id.

00:19:41.000 If you will.

00:19:43.000 Oh my God, this show's sucking so bad.

00:19:45.000 I don't know.

00:19:48.000 Well, another thing about OP too, it's like, you know how it's fun to mess around with your friends in class because it's kind of mischievous?

00:19:56.000 There's not that mischief when Opie's gone because he would actually get upset that he's not involved in the conversation.

00:20:02.000 And that kind of jealousy or just you guys are having too much fun, that's what makes it more funny.

00:20:08.000 Well, sometimes he sucked so bad that that was funny.

00:20:11.000 Like there was one episode of Opie and Anthony where they talked about abolishing sports.

00:20:16.000 I've talked about this a million times, but they said, let's just get rid of all sports and make it all one big sport.

00:20:23.000 And it'll take up Ohio.

00:20:25.000 And every athlete in the country is divided into two teams and they just have to get the ball to the other side.

00:20:31.000 Because New York and California.

00:20:33.000 And the stadium is all of Ohio.

00:20:35.000 Right, right.

00:20:36.000 So you watch, I guess, from other states as this army of thousands of people trying to take the ball and it's like one big game and they play it once a year or something like that.

00:20:44.000 Patrice O'Neal was certainly involved in that.

00:20:46.000 Oh, yes, he was.

00:20:47.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:20:48.000 And everyone's laughing their heads off.

00:20:50.000 And then OP says, but what about slavery?

00:20:54.000 See, that is funny.

00:20:57.000 And then everyone just sort of stops and goes, wait, what?

00:20:57.000 What?

00:21:01.000 And then they were all marveling at how he wrecked one of the funniest bits in the history of the show.

00:21:06.000 And I just thought, that's even good.

00:21:08.000 Yeah.

00:21:09.000 That he wrecked that.

00:21:10.000 Speaking of slavery.

00:21:12.000 Real quick, I think they actually, it sounds like they made up a little bit.

00:21:17.000 I don't care.

00:21:18.000 Fuck, Brian.

00:21:20.000 We're trying to sell salacious gossip here.

00:21:22.000 And you're like, oh, that exciting story I told you, it's all been worked out.

00:21:25.000 There's no conflict anymore.

00:21:26.000 No, it hasn't.

00:21:26.000 It was sarcastic.

00:21:28.000 Okay.

00:21:29.000 They did a sarcastic makeup.

00:21:30.000 I saw there's this new play out that everyone's talking about here in New York called Slave.

00:21:36.000 What is it called?

00:21:37.000 Slave story?

00:21:38.000 Slave play.

00:21:40.000 Hi, I'm a gay black guy, and I want to do a play.

00:21:44.000 What's the most catering, pandering, predictable thing I could do it on?

00:21:50.000 I know, what about slavery?

00:21:51.000 Okay, what should I call it?

00:21:53.000 Slavery play?

00:21:54.000 Slave play?

00:21:55.000 Okay, let's do slave play. 0.99

00:21:58.000 So it's a play.

00:21:59.000 This is 2-6.

00:22:01.000 It's a play about interracial couples who are not getting along very well.

00:22:08.000 Look at this guy.

00:22:09.000 Jeremy O'Harris.

00:22:10.000 What guy?

00:22:11.000 That's a guy.

00:22:13.000 Where?

00:22:14.000 Oh, the name Jeremy O'Harris.

00:22:15.000 Yeah, that's a guy's name.

00:22:17.000 No, that guy.

00:22:18.000 And they're just kissing his ass.

00:22:20.000 So I think the play is about eight interracial couples or four interracial couples, eight people who are having trouble with their sex life.

00:22:26.000 So they go to a sex counseling place, and the counselor suggests that they play slave in their sex, where the white people are the masters and the blacks are the slaves.

00:22:38.000 I mean, we should probably go see it.

00:22:41.000 Oh my God, yes.

00:22:42.000 But God, it's going to be like that.

00:22:44.000 Cat musical.

00:22:46.000 Like every frame is going to be torture.

00:22:48.000 But listen, look at him talk.

00:22:50.000 This is how tedious pop culture has become.

00:22:53.000 Seth Myers is so mashed potatoes.

00:22:56.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:22:57.000 Admiration for Rihanna.

00:22:59.000 You actually use a Rihanna song in your show.

00:23:02.000 Is this something that you had always thought you wanted, or was it after you actually saw it on its feet?

00:23:07.000 You were like, he introduced that as we both are totally obsessed with Rihanna.

00:23:11.000 Has Seth Myers ever said anything that you can remember?

00:23:16.000 Like, talk about background music.

00:23:18.000 He is just, he's just like a paper plate.

00:23:21.000 He's not funny.

00:23:22.000 He's just willing to participate.

00:23:24.000 He's there.

00:23:24.000 He's such a placeholder.

00:23:26.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:23:27.000 I opened for him once doing stand-up.

00:23:30.000 Really?

00:23:30.000 Yep.

00:23:31.000 He sucked?

00:23:33.000 Yes, he was terrible.

00:23:34.000 And it's New York City.

00:23:36.000 So people want like Coke and sex stories and threesomes and murder. 0.96

00:23:40.000 Like they want it to be raunchy.

00:23:42.000 And he just did this fucking, basically a Christian rock album.

00:23:46.000 I have a feeling he's one of those where he does a punchline that says, um, he's like, he's like, so that's my girlfriend.

00:23:53.000 Been thinking about his next joke, kicking the ground a little bit.

00:23:56.000 That's with this well.

00:23:57.000 Well, I mean, the thing was, so Rihanna is so a part of me.

00:24:03.000 Not to make this like person who's so not inside of my body, person that's inside of my body, but she lives inside of me.

00:24:10.000 Like she actually does.

00:24:10.000 Okay, gotcha.

00:24:11.000 So if we need her.

00:24:12.000 Yeah, if you need her, I can actually like summon her to the space now.

00:24:15.000 I mean, where do you think I got the jacket?

00:24:18.000 But the thing is, when the play came to me, it hit me like a bolt of lightning.

00:24:23.000 And the first thing that was playing in my mind was work.

00:24:26.000 And that's because, and this is kind of a spoiler, but like work is a song that played in my mind for three years straight.

00:24:33.000 So I decided that it should play in the mind of the lead characters for three years straight.

00:24:37.000 It's great that you have it.

00:24:37.000 Gotcha.

00:24:38.000 And then she came and saw the show.

00:24:39.000 She did.

00:24:40.000 And that must have been for you, as any creator of art.

00:24:43.000 When someone watching it, I zoned out.

00:24:47.000 I was thinking about all the songs I have stuck in my head for years.

00:24:50.000 I've had songs stuck in my head.

00:24:51.000 You know, I'll sing, Believe It or Not, I'm Walking on Air, just out of nowhere.

00:24:55.000 That's been in my since I was about 12.

00:24:58.000 I don't care.

00:25:00.000 Rayan, I don't care.

00:25:02.000 It's not something crazy.

00:25:04.000 It's okay.

00:25:06.000 He walks away physically.

00:25:08.000 So anyway, this is playing, and they have a Q ⁇ A at the end where Jeremy O'Toole, that's not it.

00:25:16.000 This is 2-8.

00:25:20.000 This woman gets up. 1.00

00:25:22.000 Look how snarky this writer is.

00:25:24.000 Brianna Sack.

00:25:26.000 This is how white women write about white women. 1.00

00:25:29.000 God, they're such bitches, aren't they? 1.00

00:25:31.000 Women hate women. 1.00

00:25:33.000 And they talk about how they get bullied online.

00:25:35.000 Yeah, by women. 0.58

00:25:36.000 We don't sit there and make fun of your purse.

00:25:38.000 We don't know what a bad purse is. 1.00

00:25:40.000 A white woman, she says with, no, go back. 1.00

00:25:43.000 Look at the disdain in that header. 0.99

00:25:45.000 A white woman interrupted a quote-unquote slave play Q ⁇ A to call its black playwright racist. 0.94

00:25:53.000 That's not what happened.

00:25:55.000 This white woman, who's likely a nut, got up and she just had enough. 1.00

00:25:59.000 And she said, I'm sick of always being seen as the horrible racist bitch. 1.00

00:26:04.000 I mean, I've had a rough life.

00:26:05.000 I had my kids taken away from me.

00:26:07.000 I've been bankrupt.

00:26:09.000 I'm an oppressed minority in that sense.

00:26:13.000 Why am I, though, the bad person in every movie, every play, everywhere I go?

00:26:17.000 Now, I don't know why you went to slave play not expecting to be shat on for an hour, but uh, yeah, the writing of that article has to be seen to be believed.

00:26:27.000 I don't want to hear that white people are the fucking playoffers.

00:26:34.000 Because you're talking about the white people right now.

00:26:37.000 Thank you.

00:26:47.000 Fucking having children taken away.

00:26:50.000 Can you hear that?

00:26:51.000 I'm not good enough to fucking raise them.

00:26:53.000 How the fuck am I not fucking martial arts?

00:26:56.000 Never this is God's name is God.

00:26:58.000 We haven't changed one.

00:27:00.000 I've never once said that you, as a white woman, are not a marginalized person, but if you heard that my flag, I don't know what to tell you.

00:27:06.000 Perhaps like read it or see it again.

00:27:18.000 And later on, he says, it's just eight people.

00:27:20.000 It's just a metaphor that represents this country today.

00:27:25.000 And then he said, so it's just about eight people.

00:27:28.000 And no, you said it's a metaphor.

00:27:30.000 A metaphor doesn't apply to just that thing.

00:27:33.000 The whole purpose of the word look, he just said it.

00:27:36.000 Yeah, he just kind of said.

00:27:37.000 It's a metaphor for our country.

00:27:39.000 It's only those eight white people on stage.

00:27:41.000 You don't get to have it both ways.

00:27:43.000 You can't say these people represent everyone and then just say, no, it's just eight people.

00:27:49.000 But yeah.

00:27:53.000 Speaking of broads, someone sent me this cartoon from this woman about, we all know the most damning piece of evidence against feminism is that women are less happy since it was invented. 1.00

00:28:07.000 And we rip them out of the kitchen and we put them into a cubicle where instead of keeping the appointments for their family, they're keeping the appointments for some stranger, some boss, some bald guy who probably wants to fuck them.

00:28:20.000 Are you happier?

00:28:21.000 No.

00:28:21.000 Your life sucks.

00:28:22.000 You were creating and shaping life.

00:28:25.000 You were creating a nest, a home for a family.

00:28:28.000 You were the leader of love.

00:28:31.000 You're the love boss when you're a housewife. 1.00

00:28:34.000 That's why Proud Boys say venerate the housewife. 0.92

00:28:36.000 And you took that away.

00:28:37.000 And what do you do?

00:28:38.000 You manage some fucking restaurant, social media.

00:28:42.000 Thanks for coming out.

00:28:44.000 And then they become busybodies and they start shitting on everyone.

00:28:47.000 Oh, we'll get to that in a second.

00:28:48.000 That's losing Lena.

00:28:50.000 But so this chick who cannot draw for shit, what's her name? 1.00

00:28:57.000 Aubrey Plaza or something?

00:29:01.000 Yeah, this is 3-3.

00:29:06.000 Yeah, this chick. 1.00

00:29:07.000 God, she sucks as an artist. 1.00

00:29:09.000 If you want to judge how good someone is at drawing, check out the hands.

00:29:13.000 What is that Klansman finger she's got poking in there? 1.00

00:29:16.000 Well, she got a pointy one just in case you need to.

00:29:18.000 Don't itch your eye with that one, lady? 1.00

00:29:20.000 No.

00:29:20.000 She's got a big fat, uncircumcised penis for another one.

00:29:23.000 Yeah.

00:29:25.000 And you can also, you can tell she just hammered out this comic when you'll see the other pictures.

00:29:29.000 But anyway, what's her name?

00:29:31.000 Her name is Aubrey Hirsch.

00:29:33.000 Aubrey Hirsch.

00:29:34.000 Women are increasingly unhappy. 1.00

00:29:36.000 This comic explains why.

00:29:37.000 All right.

00:29:38.000 Because they can't draw.

00:29:41.000 Drawing is hard.

00:29:42.000 That's why they're unhappy.

00:29:43.000 They don't feel satisfied by their shit.

00:29:45.000 Look how shitty that is.

00:29:47.000 Like, look at their mouths.

00:29:48.000 And it gets worse.

00:29:49.000 So American women have made incredible progress since 1970. 1.00

00:29:52.000 You can go through it.

00:29:53.000 And so it just starts out speaking truth to power, but explaining our point, which is everything's getting better for them.

00:29:59.000 You got more educated.

00:30:00.000 You got what you asked for.

00:30:02.000 And what happens?

00:30:03.000 You're fucking miserable.

00:30:04.000 You don't have to go through it this slowly.

00:30:08.000 And there they are.

00:30:08.000 Their satisfaction has gone down.

00:30:10.000 So this is what I always say, too, about the left.

00:30:13.000 They get fucked over when they find data that contradicts their beliefs and they become more steadfast in those beliefs.

00:30:19.000 So unlike scientists, they start on a path.

00:30:22.000 And then when the data says, no, that's not what happened, they just go, yes, it is.

00:30:28.000 So her mental gymnastics in this are that, yes, we are less happy since feminism and since working in the workforce, but it's because we still have to do chores.

00:30:38.000 Okay, just a little break here.

00:30:40.000 I like how she's pushing diversity, and then she ends up making black men look lazy.

00:30:45.000 Yeah, this is women's equality. 1.00

00:30:48.000 But look how bad.

00:30:49.000 No, go back to that panel.

00:30:50.000 Look how bad she is at drawing feet. 1.00

00:30:52.000 Oh, geez.

00:30:53.000 That woman's right foot. 1.00

00:30:54.000 And then look at his left leg.

00:30:57.000 Like his hip goes all the way up to his tits. 0.54

00:31:01.000 And his leg is actually protruding from his.

00:31:01.000 Oh, yeah.

00:31:04.000 So she's, her contention is, yeah, we're unhappy, but it's because you make us still fold laundry.

00:31:11.000 Yeah.

00:31:11.000 No, lady, that's not why you're unhappy.

00:31:13.000 You're unhappy because you're a wizard.

00:31:16.000 You're Superman.

00:31:18.000 And we said, hey, Superman, don't fly.

00:31:21.000 Don't save any more lives.

00:31:23.000 I just want you to be Clark Kent.

00:31:27.000 Wait, look at this one.

00:31:29.000 It's especially now harder because we see what we're missing.

00:31:31.000 Go back to the, especially now that we're finally close enough to see what we're missing.

00:31:35.000 So before they didn't know how awesome it was to be a man.

00:31:37.000 Let me explain to you what it is to run a company as a CEO.

00:31:41.000 It fucking sucks.

00:31:44.000 It's really, really hard.

00:31:46.000 You're going through expense reports.

00:31:47.000 You're going through Excel spreadsheets.

00:31:50.000 You're looking at all of this data all day long.

00:31:52.000 Men like it because we have testosterone and testosterone is a concentration drug and we like going through numbers and trying to make things better for everyone and trying to generate more profits.

00:32:01.000 That's a fun little video game to us.

00:32:03.000 But women don't like it. 1.00

00:32:05.000 And now that you're in our shoes, I think they think that we just had these madmen lunches with bourbon at a strip club.

00:32:11.000 No, we eat at our desk.

00:32:12.000 We're working our fucking asses off.

00:32:15.000 And it's not fun.

00:32:17.000 And more importantly, you're not genetically predisposed to do it.

00:32:21.000 You're genetically predisposed to love.

00:32:23.000 And we took that away.

00:32:24.000 Superman can't fly.

00:32:26.000 When Superman is only Clark Kent, Superman is miserable.

00:32:29.000 And that's what they're learning.

00:32:31.000 Anyway, side note: I was looking up that woman, and she's a really tedious Midwestern feminist, terrible artist who, just like that gay black guy who did the slave play, people just pander to because of affirmative action and the lack of meritocracy in our society. 1.00

00:32:50.000 And I saw she was on some panel with a bunch of ugly fat lesbian cartoonists. 1.00

00:32:56.000 And this is not really anything to do with what I'm talking about.

00:32:59.000 This is more about the jargon of academia.

00:33:02.000 I only check in on academics, academia, like once every five years.

00:33:06.000 And every time I do, I just come out going, what the fuck did I just see?

00:33:10.000 So this is a panel that that cartoonist was on.

00:33:13.000 And that fat woman, look at her fucking arms. 1.00

00:33:16.000 Wait, which one is it?

00:33:17.000 The one in the middle?

00:33:18.000 That's not her. 0.97

00:33:19.000 No, she's sitting on that same couch on the other end.

00:33:22.000 You'll see her in a second.

00:33:23.000 But yeah, those are all like cartoonists and poets and blah, blah, blah.

00:33:29.000 And they're all speaking in this crazy jargon.

00:33:31.000 And I just wanted to parse it for a second.

00:33:33.000 So this is a question Aubrey gets asked at Yale.

00:33:37.000 Yale.

00:33:38.000 This is supposed to be one of our finest education institutions.

00:33:42.000 Educational institutions?

00:33:43.000 Shit, I can't speak.

00:33:44.000 I told you this show was going to bite.

00:33:46.000 But let's try to understand what the fuck this professor is saying.

00:33:53.000 Turn it up.

00:33:54.000 Yeah.

00:33:55.000 And certainly none of your stories, any of you on this stage, are oversimplified or innocent or, right?

00:34:03.000 This is what makes you all so wonderful here.

00:34:05.000 That's her. 0.88

00:34:05.000 Your capacity to tell this more complex story. 0.88

00:34:09.000 Okay, that's fine.

00:34:12.000 We're now speaking English.

00:34:14.000 None of your stories are oversimplified.

00:34:15.000 I don't think that's necessarily true, but at least it's in English.

00:34:19.000 And you guys are complex storytellers.

00:34:22.000 Okay, you're kissing their ass.

00:34:23.000 It's probably not true, but whatever.

00:34:25.000 At least it's English. 1.00

00:34:26.000 Now this is where it goes haywire.

00:34:28.000 About, I'm sort of going back to my question about who you're writing for, right?

00:34:34.000 Because to the extent that the sort of first pass of that was about writing for your earlier selves.

00:34:40.000 Pause.

00:34:41.000 All English so far.

00:34:43.000 Yeah.

00:34:43.000 Your first draft, your first pass of storytelling was referring to your earlier self.

00:34:48.000 You were writing, going through the baggage you had when you were a teenager.

00:34:52.000 You probably did a bunch of autobio stuff about adolescence.

00:34:55.000 Fine.

00:34:55.000 We're still speaking English.

00:34:57.000 I'm still on board with Yale.

00:35:01.000 This feels to me like part of that is being able to hold out for those selves or the sort of permutations of those selves that are out in the world.

00:35:11.000 Pause.

00:35:12.000 The notion that...

00:35:19.000 So now you're saying you're using other people's stories in your story, I guess is what she's getting at.

00:35:25.000 But we're slowly losing the English now.

00:35:27.000 Now we're fading into psychotic jargon that no one in the real world uses.

00:35:33.000 These poor academics must get out in the real world and say, so boss, are we going to be focusing on intersectionality?

00:35:40.000 Are those two things going to have a dialogue?

00:35:42.000 What?

00:35:45.000 They're a different fucking race. 1.00

00:35:48.000 In order to have this count, you don't have to have been fully innocent.

00:35:52.000 And as I say that, I don't mean to say that the complexity always has to be there, right?

00:35:57.000 Because the flip side is as soon as you give up on the innocence, then, well, it must have been all your fault or, you know, you must have deserved it.

00:36:04.000 So keeping that balance just seems so critical.

00:36:08.000 Tied into that balance, I think, is the, you were speaking about this a few minutes ago, the need to move between the individual, the specificity of the individual story.

00:36:19.000 Pause.

00:36:24.000 The specificity.

00:36:25.000 The need to move from the individual specificity of that story.

00:36:31.000 What the fuck does that mean?

00:36:34.000 The need to move from the individual specificity of that story.

00:36:38.000 Because you're writing about yourself biographically.

00:36:42.000 This is way over your head.

00:36:42.000 Shut up, Ryan.

00:36:44.000 I'm a genius and I'm barely hanging on.

00:36:46.000 Because you have to relate to other people, so you have to lose the autobiographical specificity to the individual, which is you, the writer.

00:36:53.000 Go back, Acantair. 0.75

00:36:55.000 Get into that balance, I think, is the...

00:37:09.000 The patterns of power and privilege and oppression.

00:37:14.000 She's really just talking about how to crowbar social justice bullshit into every fucking story you tell. 1.00

00:37:20.000 Like slave play.

00:37:21.000 Go ahead.

00:37:22.000 That the histories, the very particular histories that you're tapping into, that give those individual specificities their meaning.

00:37:30.000 Okay, that give those individual specificities meaning.

00:37:33.000 Okay, I get it now.

00:37:34.000 So the individual specificities is like when I had my first period when I was 13.

00:37:38.000 And then you're crowbarring in sexism and intersectionality and all the bullshit fucking agenda shit you have to do and tying it to that individual specificity.

00:37:49.000 Specificity?

00:37:50.000 I've never heard anyone say the word specificity in my fucking life.

00:37:54.000 Never.

00:37:55.000 I only know what it means because I can guess.

00:37:58.000 But no one says specificity.

00:38:01.000 Specificity?

00:38:03.000 Specificity.

00:38:04.000 Specificity.

00:38:05.000 Specificity of ourselves.

00:38:08.000 She's just trying to sound smart because she's in over her head. 0.97

00:38:10.000 This is what they do.

00:38:11.000 This is like astrology.

00:38:12.000 Women feel overwhelmed by science, so they make up a fake science with Aquarius and Libra, and then they become an expert on that stupid bullshit. 1.00

00:38:22.000 It's like card reading.

00:38:24.000 Which fucking Milo does.

00:38:26.000 Yeah, he does.

00:38:28.000 Go ahead.

00:38:30.000 And at the same time, those very patterns are so often about the erasure of specificity.

00:38:35.000 Those very patterns are about the erasure.

00:38:35.000 Pause.

00:38:40.000 Why is she... 1.00

00:38:46.000 You mean about erasing specific details?

00:38:49.000 Like, why don't they fucking speak English?

00:38:52.000 That's weird.

00:38:54.000 Erasure of specificity.

00:38:56.000 I remember one time I took this class in college, the Philosophy of science, which was a stupid move on my part.

00:39:04.000 And the guy would speak in this jargon.

00:39:05.000 And one day I said, You know what?

00:39:07.000 I'm not letting one thing go by that I don't understand.

00:39:10.000 And it was exactly the same as this.

00:39:12.000 And he would just say, All right, so before we focus on the erasure of specificity, I was like, What does that mean?

00:39:20.000 What do you mean by specificity?

00:39:22.000 And my arm, I was like Hitler, Ziegheiling to the ceiling. 0.80

00:39:28.000 And eventually he just told me, look, we have to get through this class.

00:39:31.000 I'm not answering a question every 30 seconds.

00:39:34.000 And I didn't have the courage back then, but I just should have said, well, then speak in English.

00:39:38.000 You're not making any sense.

00:39:40.000 You're speaking in a made-up language. 0.99

00:39:42.000 It's like when lawyers, you ever get a contract from a lawyer and you go, this is taking too long.

00:39:45.000 Give me that contract.

00:39:47.000 I'll answer this.

00:39:48.000 And then you start reading it and you go, I don't understand any of this.

00:39:50.000 The divisive exclusionary system of the elaborate.

00:39:55.000 Okay, go back.

00:39:56.000 They get those things in those individual specificities, their meaning.

00:40:00.000 And at the same time, those very patterns are so often about the erasure of specificity.

00:40:05.000 So once you try to get those things in dialogue with each other.

00:40:08.000 Pause.

00:40:09.000 And once you want to try to get these things in dialogue with each other, imagine if you're at a meeting in the real world and you say, hey guys, so we're going to talk about HR, human relations here, human resources, sorry, and also, you know, productivity and sort of getting these two things to have a dialogue with each other.

00:40:30.000 People would laugh.

00:40:31.000 You definitely, one person in the boardroom would go, what?

00:40:36.000 Oh, I want them to have two things to have a dialogue with each other.

00:40:39.000 Things don't speak.

00:40:41.000 Well, it's good that at least they all speak this language, and that's not going to trip any of these guys up because it's like that's how they speak.

00:40:47.000 Oh, it trips up Aubrey, all right?

00:40:49.000 Oh, no, I couldn't imagine so.

00:40:51.000 Curious about that, if you could talk about how you are, from all of your really different angles, weighing these broader circulating dynamics without ever having that lose sight of the person, the actual whole human person at the same time.

00:41:06.000 Broader dynamics?

00:41:08.000 That one was bad.

00:41:08.000 That question, by the way, is...

00:41:12.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:41:13.000 You're doing autobio stuff.

00:41:15.000 It's very specific to your life.

00:41:17.000 And I'm sure initially you get all your yeahs out talking about how hard adolescence was.

00:41:21.000 But then eventually you want to start having bigger themes.

00:41:24.000 And how do you retain your sort of your style, your individuality when you're talking about sexism and racism and all that stuff?

00:41:31.000 And then also losing your innocence in there and then trying to pertain to other people, but not trying to follow the patterns too much and then keep the individuality.

00:41:39.000 Okay, Ryan, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.

00:41:41.000 No, I get it.

00:41:41.000 Just join them.

00:41:42.000 Okay, go ahead, lady. 1.00

00:41:46.000 Go, Aubrey.

00:41:48.000 Yeah, that's an interesting question.

00:41:50.000 You know, just pause.

00:41:53.000 They don't understand each other.

00:41:56.000 That's the craziest part.

00:41:57.000 So one person speaks in gobbledygook gibberish for five minutes, that seemed like.

00:42:03.000 And then the other person goes, how am I going to answer that?

00:42:06.000 I'll just start talking my own version of gibberish.

00:42:06.000 I know.

00:42:09.000 And it's almost like jazz musicians just going, no one's moving forward.

00:42:18.000 If I was a teacher and this was all written out, I would just be like, superfluous, superfluous.

00:42:23.000 This whole paragraph can go.

00:42:25.000 This is extraneous.

00:42:26.000 Nope, nope.

00:42:28.000 It's so inefficient.

00:42:30.000 Go, Aubrey.

00:42:32.000 And by the way, while you're up there, can you explain to us why women are less happy since feminism?

00:42:36.000 Why are they all looking to her, by the way, too?

00:42:39.000 Because they're like, thank God I didn't get it.

00:42:41.000 Yeah.

00:42:42.000 They're like, thank God I did not get asked that question.

00:42:44.000 Of course.

00:42:45.000 Because I didn't understand it.

00:42:49.000 Yeah, it's an interesting question.

00:42:52.000 You know, how you kind of add in research to your piece to give it that kind of universal feeling or to tap into what's going on.

00:43:06.000 You know, some of my writing, a lot of my writing has to do with medicine and trauma or science and trauma in some way, like memories.

00:43:16.000 What a fucking loser.

00:43:17.000 She doesn't seem that bad, this Aubrey.

00:43:19.000 What do you mean doesn't seem that bad?

00:43:20.000 I'm not saying she's Satan.

00:43:22.000 She's talentless and has nothing to say. 1.00

00:43:24.000 Absolutely.

00:43:25.000 But I like how she doesn't fit in with these weirdos.

00:43:27.000 She's like, yeah, I...

00:43:32.000 Yeah.

00:43:33.000 She laughed because it was that ridiculous and looked at somebody else like, do you believe this fucking shit?

00:43:37.000 By the way, speaking of fucking Clown World, this is some Rando Calarisian 1.6.

00:43:46.000 Billy D. Williams opened up about his gender identity in a new Esquire interview, telling the publication's culture editor Matt Miller, I say himself and herself because I also see myself as feminine as well as masculine.

00:44:02.000 I'm a very soft person and I'm not afraid to show that side.

00:44:07.000 This means he gets butt-fucked by a chick with a strap on. 1.00

00:44:10.000 That's what I'm getting.

00:44:11.000 I get entered.

00:44:12.000 After Miller pointed out that Donald Glover talked about that type of gender fluidity when portraying young Lando in 2018's solo, Williams responds, really?

00:44:19.000 That kid is brilliant.

00:44:21.000 So now Rando will Lando Calarisien's a fag. 1.00

00:44:25.000 That's basically what we're getting.

00:44:28.000 Oh, he seemed pretty cool.

00:44:30.000 Oh, here's another one.

00:44:31.000 These kingsters take the drama and spandex of superheroes to the next level.

00:44:36.000 What is this now?

00:44:37.000 What is this?

00:44:38.000 Them.

00:44:38.000 It's them.

00:44:40.000 So it's pornographic.

00:44:45.000 Gays just have too much time on their hands. 1.00

00:44:47.000 They're really living on the high.

00:44:49.000 They're always photographing themselves, too.

00:44:51.000 They're really into almost more than girls.

00:44:55.000 All right, let's go into racism bender. 0.99

00:44:57.000 So if you recall, back when our proud boys were sent to prison for four years, De Blasio said, this is 2-2, hate is never welcome in NYC.

00:45:15.000 And then 2-3, de Blasio chimed in, hate cannot and will not be tolerated in New York.

00:45:24.000 And right?

00:45:28.000 So hate is, the mayor and the governor have had enough of hate in their city.

00:45:35.000 Yet, totally silent, 2-1, when actress Jennifer Agassini, 43, a swimsuit model, what was it?

00:45:47.000 So She ran up a $1,000 tab at a Midtown Lounge Skyroom for their friend's birthday before leaving on 3 a.m.

00:45:54.000 Sunday papers filed, blah, blah, blah.

00:45:56.000 But on their way out of the West 40th Street, they got jumped and beaten to the ground by a group of 10 to 15 people who were young people.

00:46:05.000 Black people.

00:46:06.000 You notice when that woman stood up at the slave play, everyone says white woman. 0.95

00:46:10.000 A white woman got up and called the play guy racist, the playwright. 0.92

00:46:15.000 But when it's black people, they just say people. 0.83

00:46:17.000 10 to 15 people who were yelling white motherfuckers, dirty white bitches, fuck those white bitches and their money, the court papers say. 1.00

00:46:25.000 It was just this stampede as we were leaving.

00:46:28.000 We just got rushed and assaulted by, I can't tell you how many people.

00:46:32.000 So Agostini, this woman, has to sue the restaurant because the police aren't going to do anything about it. 1.00

00:46:37.000 Because the police are at the behest of de Blasio and Cuomo.

00:46:41.000 And de Blasio and Cuomo don't want that narrative.

00:46:46.000 The narrative they want is evil Nazis running the streets and hate won't be tolerated.

00:46:50.000 When it's black people beating the shit out of white people, they totally fucking ignore it. 0.99

00:46:54.000 And as a New Yorker who travels the subways, I hear mentally ill homeless people railing about white people every fucking day.

00:47:03.000 And they're saying things that would totally scandalize any white person if they ever did the reverse.

00:47:09.000 And then we also had in Queens, Cuomo and de Blasio were totally silent about, this is 2-0, a hateful vandal scrawled, fuck white people in front of a Queens home and deface nearby trees fences with profane messages.

00:47:23.000 That story will die on the line.

00:47:24.000 Conversely, in Brooklyn, a couple years ago, some moron did a shitty swastika backwards and said Trump on a slide with a marker.

00:47:34.000 There was an entire ceremony.

00:47:37.000 500 people got together, including Muslim clerics and rabbis, to talk about hate and how it has no home here.

00:47:46.000 Stop it.

00:47:48.000 Fucking the dude who...

00:47:51.000 Buggin'. 0.94

00:47:52.000 Buggin, yeah.

00:47:53.000 The dude who invented email, whose name I can never remember, he's a great guy, Ivandi.

00:48:01.000 Hey, immigrants. 0.99

00:48:03.000 When you come here, change your name to Mike.

00:48:04.000 Shiva.

00:48:05.000 Shiva.

00:48:06.000 Yeah.

00:48:07.000 Ayudari.

00:48:08.000 Ayadurari.

00:48:09.000 Shiva Ayudari.

00:48:10.000 Or known to his friends as Mike Ayudari.

00:48:14.000 We've had him on the show many times.

00:48:14.000 Great guy.

00:48:16.000 He had a free speech rally that some Proud Boys were going to be at.

00:48:19.000 I think there was about eight people speaking and maybe 14 people showed up.

00:48:25.000 10,000 Bostoners took to the streets to say, hate has no home here.

00:48:32.000 What?

00:48:33.000 Protesting an Indian guy who was for free speech, you fucking losers? 1.00

00:48:39.000 Or how about the rally in Philadelphia?

00:48:42.000 Yeah, that was it.

00:48:44.000 No to Monsanto.

00:48:46.000 Black lives do matter.

00:48:49.000 Those people had 10,000 people protesting them.

00:48:54.000 How fucking retarded? 1.00

00:48:55.000 Or again, in Philly, there was a rally, and it was just like a bunch of patriotic boomers.

00:49:01.000 And the entire city had a complete fucking meltdown.

00:49:06.000 At one point, Antifa jumped two Mexican Marines, calling them wetbacks, because they thought they were proud boys.

00:49:13.000 And the rumor became that it was a celebration of not the Constitution, but the synagogue shooting.

00:49:22.000 What?

00:49:23.000 I got to write all these down in a book.

00:49:26.000 And then the Jewish Museum, they said it was going to be held in front of the Jewish Museum.

00:49:30.000 Really?

00:49:30.000 How'd they get a permit to celebrate a synagogue shooting in front of a Jewish museum?

00:49:34.000 And the Jewish Museum in Philadelphia said, we're open today.

00:49:38.000 We're standing up for ourselves.

00:49:40.000 Look, that's fights breaking out based on a fucking myth.

00:49:45.000 Or there was the guy, the chick in Oakland who was killed by a mental patient, a career criminal, stabbed some 13-year-old black chick to death, and it became Proud Boys did it.

00:49:56.000 And then they were going to a bar to celebrate the murder.

00:49:59.000 And so they beat the living shit out of some guy just because he's wearing a USA shirt.

00:49:59.000 Oh, yeah.

00:50:03.000 And they assumed he was one of them.

00:50:05.000 They thought they were celebrating the murder.

00:50:07.000 The worst, deadliest, spookiest gangs in the world don't go to bars to celebrate murders of random teenagers.

00:50:13.000 Like Nazis wouldn't do that in 1943, you fucking losers. 0.74

00:50:20.000 Anyway, yeah, Max and John in jail for four years.

00:50:27.000 Look at 2-4.

00:50:28.000 De Blasio and Cuomo, to push this narrative of we have a horrible racist culture and all these black men are in jail.

00:50:38.000 This is 2-4.

00:50:39.000 They're going to release 125,000 criminals.

00:50:42.000 Now, I'm kind of for that because I hate the idea that there's all these people in jail for selling drugs and stuff.

00:50:49.000 But it's arbitrary in the sense that patriots are not included in this.

00:50:56.000 So those two men are responsible for putting two patriots in prison for four years, yet they're happy to release 125,000 accused criminals and reward them with Mets tickets, which is kind of insulting to me.

00:51:10.000 What?

00:51:10.000 Yeah, they're giving them Mets tickets.

00:51:13.000 Holy shit.

00:51:14.000 Look, they got a whole list there of the shit they get, right?

00:51:17.000 List of crimes where suspects will be freed from prison before trial includes second-degree manslaughter, aggravated.

00:51:23.000 Promoting an obscene sexual performance by a child.

00:51:25.000 I don't want that guy out.

00:51:27.000 Possessing an obscene sexual performance by a child?

00:51:30.000 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

00:51:32.000 We want only drug war shit.

00:51:34.000 Failure to register as a sex offender.

00:51:37.000 Making terroristic threats.

00:51:39.000 Criminally negligent homicide.

00:51:41.000 Aggravated vehicular homicide.

00:51:43.000 Aggravated vehicular homicide.

00:51:44.000 That's pretty fucking bad.

00:51:45.000 That's pretty bad.

00:51:46.000 Wow.

00:51:47.000 And then the list of bail.

00:51:50.000 Well, they're imposing bail.

00:51:51.000 Yeah.

00:51:52.000 Jeesh.

00:51:53.000 But so there was these banners that went up around town.

00:51:56.000 We told you about this.

00:51:57.000 And it said Smiling in the Face of Tyranny.

00:51:59.000 And it had Max Hare's face on it.

00:52:02.000 And Cuomo, that pissed off Cuomo a lot.

00:52:06.000 And he called the prison and made Max, I think it's called a CNC prisoner, which is like a criminally something case.

00:52:14.000 He personally did that?

00:52:15.000 Yeah.

00:52:16.000 And now, John Kinsman, who wasn't on the banners, is treated normal.

00:52:20.000 But Max gets abused by this probation officer who calls him a Nazi now, just out of the blue since the banners.

00:52:26.000 And he's basically Hannibal Lecter when he travels.

00:52:31.000 Like he has to travel alone in a Kevlar vest.

00:52:34.000 He'll have a procession on the road with him.

00:52:36.000 He won't go in like the school bus that they all go in. 0.98

00:52:39.000 He'll be treated like Hannibal Lecter.

00:52:41.000 And he's going to serve his sentence in a maximum security prison now.

00:52:45.000 Max.

00:52:47.000 John won't.

00:52:48.000 Same crime.

00:52:49.000 But the optics, Cuomo doesn't like being called Frito.

00:52:54.000 And you know what else is funny about that?

00:52:57.000 Another one of the banners criticized this rabbi who had raped an eight-year-old many, many times.

00:53:06.000 And his sentence was going to be 10 to 35 years.

00:53:09.000 The judge who gave Proud Boys four years gave this guy, Leibowitz, three months.

00:53:16.000 He gave him a year, but he had already served nine months.

00:53:21.000 So 10, 11, 12.

00:53:23.000 Just three more months and you're good to go for raping children. 1.00

00:53:27.000 And you know what's a trip?

00:53:28.000 Alan Dershowitz was his legal team.

00:53:31.000 This is 1-9.

00:53:32.000 Mr. Leibowitz, who was represented by Arthur L. Adala at his trial, was convicted in 2010 of 8 out of 10 counts of molesting.

00:53:41.000 Molestating?

00:53:42.000 I never heard that word before.

00:53:43.000 He was sentenced to 10.5 to 32 years in prison.

00:53:47.000 But his legal team, by then bolstered by the addition of Professor Alan M. Dershowitz of Harvard Law School, persuaded the authorities to place him under house arrest pending his appeal.

00:53:58.000 So anyway, one of the banners was of this Leibowitz guy, and it said, Patriot, no.

00:54:06.000 And then pedophile, check.

00:54:08.000 And it had a picture of Mark Dwyer, the judge, who screwed Proud Boys and was kind to this pedophile.

00:54:15.000 And Antifa decided that that particular banner was anti-Semitic because it featured someone wearing a yarmulke, and it enforced bizarre conspiracy theories.

00:54:27.000 This is 1.7.

00:54:29.000 No, this is sorry, 1.8.

00:54:31.000 It enforced anti-Semitic conspiracy theories.

00:54:35.000 What?

00:54:35.000 So they steal this flag and then they burn it.

00:54:43.000 So Antifa is featured here burning a flag that blasphemes their precious pedophiles. 1.00

00:54:54.000 How fucking retarded. 1.00

00:54:55.000 This is like when we did the Sharia rally and they were all there protesting it, defending Sharia, where women are second-class citizens. 0.99

00:55:02.000 You had these feminists going, leave Sharia alone. 1.00

00:55:05.000 We love Sharia.

00:55:08.000 Is that not playing?

00:55:09.000 Nope.

00:55:10.000 I don't know, frankly.

00:55:10.000 Why not?

00:55:11.000 I'm going to open it up in a different browse.

00:55:13.000 Are you in Brave?

00:55:15.000 Yeah.

00:55:16.000 Is Brave letting us down?

00:55:17.000 I hope not.

00:55:18.000 It's been really good so far.

00:55:20.000 I hope it's not a doad.

00:55:22.000 I hope not.

00:55:23.000 Mark Norman would hate that.

00:55:25.000 I'd be like, that sucks.

00:55:28.000 Let's see.

00:55:31.000 I think it's just a toad.

00:55:32.000 Oh, come on. 0.87

00:55:34.000 Was it working on yours?

00:55:36.000 I only saw it on my phone.

00:55:39.000 This is being such a toad.

00:55:42.000 And they're all posing for pictures with it.

00:55:45.000 Like, burn one of the other banners.

00:55:48.000 Like, there was another banner they put up that said never surrender or something.

00:55:53.000 If you burn that one, that's a good message as far as your side goes.

00:55:56.000 Hey, they said they never surrender.

00:55:57.000 Oh, yeah, they're going to surrender alright.

00:55:59.000 Here we are burning their ship.

00:56:02.000 That's a good move.

00:56:03.000 That's not a toad.

00:56:04.000 That's not a toad.

00:56:08.000 Oh, man.

00:56:09.000 Um.

00:56:11.000 Hold on a second.

00:56:13.000 I'm going to play it on my phone.

00:56:16.000 And then you can be a toad.

00:56:18.000 I don't know how to be a toad.

00:56:22.000 I'm getting hot.

00:56:25.000 Now this is updating.

00:56:26.000 God damn it, technology!

00:56:29.000 I'm not going to let you win, though.

00:56:30.000 All right, well, we'll...

00:56:34.000 God damn it.

00:56:36.000 Now my whole thing's frozen.

00:56:43.000 Oh, I saw this was an interesting story about immigration, and it'll lead us into the mailbag.

00:56:49.000 You know the Yazidis?

00:56:51.000 There are these women who were tortured by ISIS and raped regularly. 0.52

00:56:57.000 And I don't recommend you looking this up if you don't have a strong stomach.

00:57:01.000 The plight of the Yazidis in the Middle East and the way they were beaten and tortured.

00:57:05.000 Raped to death.

00:57:08.000 Regularly raped to death.

00:57:11.000 Hundreds of them.

00:57:12.000 An entire race of people kidnapped, abused, and beaten and treated as sex slaves.

00:57:19.000 So that's, and they're Christians, by the way.

00:57:21.000 That's why they're abused.

00:57:23.000 So shouldn't that be our priority as a nation to take in Christian refugees?

00:57:28.000 The Coptic Christians are being slaughtered all over Egypt. 0.95

00:57:31.000 They will assimilate better than Muslims or any other culture. 1.00

00:57:35.000 And the left hates that kind of talk.

00:57:36.000 You know what they phrase that?

00:57:38.000 They frame that as, I only want to help people that think like me.

00:57:43.000 Okay.

00:57:44.000 You can use that shitty terminology if you want.

00:57:46.000 Yeah.

00:57:48.000 I have to choose.

00:57:49.000 I have to have some sort of metrics.

00:57:51.000 I got two people here.

00:57:52.000 One of them has a convert or die mentality.

00:57:55.000 The other has a Christian mentality.

00:57:57.000 This nation was built by Christianity, as Buchanan makes very clear in Death of the West. 0.99

00:58:01.000 I think I'm going to go with that one.

00:58:03.000 Sophie's choice.

00:58:06.000 So anyway, this woman is taken in by Germany.

00:58:08.000 Thank you, Germany.

00:58:09.000 Nice priorities.

00:58:11.000 But they also took in her captor.

00:58:14.000 Oh, my God.

00:58:15.000 And then he finds her.

00:58:16.000 No.

00:58:17.000 He tracks her down and he goes, I'm going to keep raping you, bitch. 1.00

00:58:20.000 What?

00:58:21.000 The ISIS militant who bought her went on to beat and sexually abuse her several times a day.

00:58:27.000 Hamid later encountered her captor On the streets of Stuttgart, Germany, during which he threatened her again, saying he knew where she lived.

00:58:39.000 Despite informing German authorities, she was told there was nothing they could do because he had been registered as a refugee like her.

00:58:49.000 This goes back to Cuomo and de Blasio with their hate has no home here unless it's fuck white people or white motherfuckers, dirty white bitches, fuck those white bitches and their money. 1.00

00:59:00.000 That hate has a home here in New York and it will be tolerated.

00:59:04.000 And as far as sexism goes, we don't tolerate it in Germany unless, of course, it's an ISIS militant, in which case, come on in.

00:59:12.000 And by the way, feel free to abuse your sex slaves. 1.00

00:59:14.000 We brought those with you to make you feel more at home.

00:59:18.000 When we moved to England.

00:59:20.000 When we moved to, sorry, Canada from England, my mom packed a huge crate with all my stuffed animals and toys.

00:59:26.000 So my room in the new country would look like my room back at home.

00:59:31.000 That's what we do to ISIS militants.

00:59:33.000 We pack them a nice crate of sex slaves. 1.00

00:59:37.000 Which takes us to the mailbag.

00:59:38.000 Ryan, shut up.

00:59:40.000 You don't have a dad.

00:59:43.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.

00:59:47.000 Let me touch it.

00:59:53.000 Hey, Gavin.

00:59:54.000 So I was at my local bar the other night and started talking to a guy next to me.

00:59:56.000 A few beers into our conversation, the subject turned to illegal immigration, and the guy turned out to be a staunch liberal when it came to this issue.

01:00:03.000 I tried to red pill him by using your typical points of how illegal immigration only helps rich whites and separates families, but he quickly shot back with something like, I get it, it sucks, but what's your alternative?

01:00:16.000 Pausing the letter.

01:00:17.000 The alternative is strict borders, just like everyone else.

01:00:20.000 How about we have borders that are as strong as Mexico's? 0.75

01:00:25.000 Mexico, every country has lessers, poorer people trying to get in, and Mexico rounds them up in a bus and kicks them the fuck out. 0.98

01:00:37.000 The vast majority of these people, when they don't come here, is they starve to death.

01:00:40.000 They die of diseases.

01:00:41.000 Their children get sold into sex slavery and sweatshops.

01:00:44.000 So child separation in either scenario.

01:00:46.000 Or they're here because of some gangs and drug cartels that threaten to kill or rape their children if they don't travel to America to make a certain amount of money to send back.

01:00:54.000 This was his first own on me.

01:00:56.000 First of all, by the way, this guy's name is Alejandro.

01:01:00.000 Alejandro, I don't believe you.

01:01:02.000 I think this story is a fucking lie.

01:01:04.000 And what you're trying to do is Trojan horse some arguments at me by pretending that you were owned at a bar by you.

01:01:13.000 So he wants to give me some gotchas, but he wants to also throw in that, Gavin, I tried to use your tools and I was betrayed and I failed.

01:01:24.000 So he's trying to be a backhanded, worthy warrior.

01:01:28.000 Right.

01:01:28.000 I'm one of you, but I was just slain.

01:01:30.000 Yeah, a worthy adversary.

01:01:32.000 How dare you?

01:01:34.000 So the message here from this guy is really the death of math.

01:01:39.000 And I want to talk about this in another show.

01:01:41.000 I'm going to have to do some research, but I saw this tweet by Rob Delaney where he said the top eight billionaires in the country own more money than half the world, and we need their money to make the Green Deal work.

01:01:52.000 I haven't done the math yet, but I guarantee you the Green Deal is going to be like $1.7 trillion. 0.94

01:01:56.000 And when I add up the money from all these eight billionaires, I bet it won't take a bite out of the cost of the Green New Deal. 0.62

01:02:03.000 And now all those billionaires are broke, and we've lost all of those jobs, all of that income.

01:02:08.000 So that'll be a fun project I'm working on later tonight.

01:02:14.000 But the argument here for the first own is that these people have no choice but to come here.

01:02:20.000 And if they stay, they'll be raped. 1.00

01:02:22.000 So they have to come here and send money back.

01:02:24.000 So now America is at the behest of El Chapo.

01:02:29.000 And we do what he says.

01:02:30.000 No, you don't negotiate with terrorists.

01:02:33.000 Because in your scenario, we are rewarding these cartels.

01:02:37.000 So the cartels say, go up there and send money back, or I'm going to kill you.

01:02:41.000 So we go, okay, okay, and take them in.

01:02:43.000 The other problem with this kind of thinking, too, is, and politicians do this all the time.

01:02:48.000 They kind of brainwash us to think the same way because they only have one term, like a four-year term.

01:02:52.000 So they think in four years and they get their glory and then they're out.

01:02:57.000 There's a thing called the future.

01:03:00.000 So we take in all these women and all these people who are being threatened by the cartels.

01:03:04.000 And then you think the problem goes away?

01:03:06.000 No, you just created an industry called we take in whoever the cartels send us.

01:03:12.000 You've rewarded them.

01:03:13.000 It's the same with immigration. 0.77

01:03:14.000 It's the same with the projects that Robert Moses built that fucking Ryan grew up in.

01:03:19.000 When you build projects, Robert Moses' mentality was, look, we have all these poor people, let's give them affordable housing.

01:03:25.000 So he built tons of projects all over the city.

01:03:27.000 And yes, for an afternoon, the poor had a place to live.

01:03:31.000 Then the poor made more poor.

01:03:33.000 And then those people didn't have a place to live.

01:03:35.000 So you had to build more projects.

01:03:37.000 You keep rewarding things.

01:03:38.000 Like you say, there's all these bunnies are breeding like crazy.

01:03:41.000 Let's give them their own room in the house. 1.00

01:03:43.000 Okay, now those bunnies are overflowing. 1.00

01:03:45.000 Now they want two rooms.

01:03:46.000 You just gave the bunnies a fuck pen. 0.89

01:03:50.000 Ain't nobody got time for that.

01:03:52.000 There's, what, 7 billion of us?

01:03:54.000 Two-thirds of the world would love to come here.

01:03:56.000 We don't have the room for 5 billion people.

01:04:00.000 Yes, there's poor people.

01:04:02.000 Yeah, we already take in more refugees, more immigrants than all other countries combined.

01:04:08.000 So to say they die if we don't take them in is myopic.

01:04:10.000 And the fact that this owned you shows that you don't have a high enough IQ to argue in bars.

01:04:16.000 You ugly.

01:04:18.000 He also said, it's funny I claim to care about the separation of non-white children from their parents, but yet I support the U.S. military, which has separated millions of soldiers from their children for decades in order to participate in oil-led interventionist wars of rich white people that has led to the death of millions of non-white families in the Middle East. 0.63

01:04:40.000 Your theory is 100% correct.

01:04:42.000 This is a sneaking the Trojan horse thing.

01:04:45.000 I wasn't with it before.

01:04:46.000 I thought maybe you were, he had a hunch.

01:04:48.000 Yeah.

01:04:48.000 That confirms it.

01:04:49.000 Yeah.

01:04:50.000 Well, you can tell by how toady, by how articulate his opponent is.

01:04:58.000 Yes, war sucks.

01:05:00.000 I don't advocate war in the Middle East.

01:05:02.000 And to say you can't be for closed borders, but you can be for war, I'm sure there are people like that.

01:05:08.000 We've always had wars.

01:05:10.000 This has always been going on.

01:05:12.000 So I'm not one of these people, but I understand there is a mentality for being pro-interventionist war and anti-immigration.

01:05:20.000 That's fine.

01:05:22.000 It's not my mentality.

01:05:23.000 I don't like those wars.

01:05:24.000 I think they're fucking stupid.

01:05:26.000 But I had a big debate with John Bolton once, and his contention was, look, if we pull out of all of these places, we're seen as weak, and that hurts the dollar, and the dollar then plummets.

01:05:39.000 That sounded like he knew what he was talking about.

01:05:42.000 It sounds like globalism to me.

01:05:44.000 Oh, there we are.

01:05:48.000 But I understand it.

01:05:51.000 So what you should have said for the second own was, I don't want those wars in the Middle East.

01:05:56.000 I want all our troops to come home.

01:05:58.000 That was the second time I was owned, he says.

01:06:01.000 The final own he got on me was when I talked about how illegal immigration incentivized sex trafficking and rape on the border.

01:06:09.000 And he said something like, if that's a problem, why don't you support expanding who can come here so those women would come here without having to go through rape channels? 0.97

01:06:20.000 And if I really cared about women being raped, why would I support deporting ones already here back to countries where they would be raped and sex trafficked?

01:06:29.000 Because we don't have room.

01:06:30.000 And also rapists can get here just as easy as a rape victim.

01:06:34.000 And Mexican culture is different than our culture. 1.00

01:06:38.000 The age of consent in Mexico is 12.

01:06:43.000 So it's not my job to fix that backwards country. 1.00

01:06:47.000 It's not my job to fix a country where rape isn't really frowned upon.

01:06:53.000 I mean, the women who come here, they take birth control before they're shipped over the border because they know they're going to get raped and they don't want to get pregnant. 0.99

01:07:00.000 It's more like, oh, well, got to get raped. 1.00

01:07:04.000 Part of the deal.

01:07:04.000 Imagine us getting on a flight knowing that we're going to get raped at the gate.

01:07:09.000 I wouldn't like that.

01:07:10.000 After immigration. 0.69

01:07:11.000 So your friend's mentality, your fictional friend's mentality, by the way, that if we just take them in, the rape will stop, is remarkably naive.

01:07:21.000 It implies that time is stagnant and populations don't increase.

01:07:25.000 As soon as we take them in, we are rewarding the rapists.

01:07:29.000 We are rewarding the cartels.

01:07:33.000 As soon as we say, okay, come in here and send those cartels money. 0.98

01:07:36.000 I remember this one chick saying to me, if we close the borders, they're going to be really mad at us and that will make them hurt us.

01:07:44.000 Okay, sorry, sorry, come on in, Colombians. 1.00

01:07:46.000 I don't want to piss you off.

01:07:48.000 I'm not the fucking world's bitch.

01:07:51.000 Because as I said in Death of Kuhl, today's bitch is tomorrow's dead man. 1.00

01:07:56.000 What fucker said that? 0.90

01:07:59.000 So if you act like a bitch as a country, then you get pushed around more. 0.99

01:08:04.000 It's like prison.

01:08:05.000 The secret to prison is when someone walks by your cell and it's looking at your commissary, you go, what?

01:08:11.000 Are you okay?

01:08:12.000 You got a problem here?

01:08:13.000 Is there an issue?

01:08:14.000 I noticed you're looking at my jujubes.

01:08:16.000 You don't have your own fucking candy?

01:08:18.000 And then that's stifled.

01:08:21.000 Shout out to the bartender who told me that story.

01:08:24.000 That's how you have to act as a country.

01:08:27.000 What's going on here?

01:08:28.000 No, oh, you want to come across the border?

01:08:30.000 The cartels?

01:08:31.000 No, no, no, we're not doing that.

01:08:32.000 Like, I'm not solving Mexico's fucking problems. 0.72

01:08:35.000 We have our own problems.

01:08:36.000 We have our own cartels.

01:08:37.000 You ever been to the south side of Chicago?

01:08:38.000 You ever been to Baltimore?

01:08:40.000 They're fucking shitholes.

01:08:41.000 St. Louis, the gang warfare in St. Louis, 19 black men are murdered a day in gang warfare.

01:08:49.000 We got our own fucking problems.

01:08:50.000 I'm not taking in every other gangster's whim around the goddamn world.

01:08:57.000 So, you're stupid for being owned.

01:08:59.000 Finally, he even brought up stories about illegal Guatemalan women he read about who are terrified of being deported by Trump because of the rape crisis there.

01:09:08.000 He also brought up who Trump had been hiring illegals for years, but his supporters don't care.

01:09:14.000 Anyway, I feel fucked up when I used your arguments.

01:09:16.000 What would you have done differently if you, me?

01:09:20.000 I feel fucked up when using your arguments.

01:09:22.000 Yeah, this guy isn't.

01:09:24.000 I feel fucked up when I used your arguments.

01:09:26.000 Arguments is spelled wrong, by the way.

01:09:29.000 Yeah, if Trump hired illegals, we frown upon that. 0.83

01:09:32.000 What the fuck are you talking about?

01:09:34.000 Some of his supporters don't care.

01:09:35.000 Well, they're wrong.

01:09:36.000 Like, this guy is forcing you to defend positions that you don't necessarily hold.

01:09:42.000 And then these Guatemalan women who are going to be deported, yeah, sorry. 0.99

01:09:46.000 You came here illegally. 0.98

01:09:48.000 Like, what if someone comes to your house and they say, hey, we have to stay here or we're going to get killed?

01:09:52.000 You go, oh, Jesus, come on inside.

01:09:54.000 And then you go, all right, well, you can't live here.

01:09:56.000 I mean, you got to get back out there at some point.

01:09:58.000 No, I can't go out there.

01:10:00.000 Okay, I guess I'll take you in.

01:10:02.000 I guess you can stay in the guest room.

01:10:03.000 Now someone else comes to the door.

01:10:05.000 Oh, hey, well, our guest room's already full.

01:10:07.000 I guess you can sleep in the kitchen.

01:10:09.000 Now, by the way, word gets out.

01:10:11.000 Hey, if you're feeling threatened, go to Gavin's house.

01:10:14.000 My cousin lives in his guest room.

01:10:15.000 My other cousin is sleeping on a cot in his kitchen.

01:10:17.000 He'll take anyone in.

01:10:18.000 Now my house is packed wall to wall with people, and the problem still exists. 0.81

01:10:23.000 Like, how naive do you have to be to think I can solve this problem by taking in some people? 0.97

01:10:28.000 Maybe the racist would find his way in there too.

01:10:30.000 The rapist would find his way back in there too, just like in Germany. 0.97

01:10:33.000 Yeah, just like Germany's a perfect example of that. 1.00

01:10:36.000 Well, small town.

01:10:37.000 We took in this woman because she was getting raped. 1.00

01:10:39.000 Then we took in her rapist.

01:10:41.000 Now he's threatening to kill her and we say, sorry, the refugees can't get involved.

01:10:45.000 It's so amazing he's not like, whew, I gotta live with that.

01:10:47.000 I'm gonna avoid her, my accuser.

01:10:50.000 He's doubling down.

01:10:51.000 Like, I'm gonna keep raping you. 0.99

01:10:53.000 Crazy.

01:10:54.000 Wonderful.

01:10:55.000 All right.

01:10:57.000 That's enough.

01:10:59.000 This shitty episode that I knew would suck is finally over.

01:11:02.000 I am the aunt angry.

01:11:06.000 Let's end this with the final video.

01:11:09.000 This is basically my only fear.

01:11:12.000 This is 3-3.

01:11:14.000 I am petrified of drunk women. 1.00

01:11:16.000 They have the potential to ruin my life by causing a scene which then goes public and then ruins my kids' social life, which is all a parent really cares about ultimately.

01:11:27.000 You can't hit them if they hit you.

01:11:29.000 They are fucking Scary.

01:11:30.000 If I walk into a bar and I see and it's in my neighborhood and I see like four drunk housewives, I will get the fuck out of there. 1.00

01:11:38.000 If I see four drunk hell's angels, I'll probably stick around.

01:11:42.000 If I see four drunk Mexicans who look like they might be in the Trinitarios or something, if I don't see a machete, I think I'll stay. 1.00

01:11:52.000 But four drunk women, it's a jail sentence waiting to happen. 1.00

01:11:57.000 Get the fuck.

01:11:58.000 If you see a drunk woman, run. 1.00

01:12:00.000 And when I watch this video, I feel nothing but fear.

01:12:03.000 Your mom can be a bitch. 1.00

01:12:06.000 Your mom is a bitch. 1.00

01:12:08.000 Yeah, no worries.

01:12:09.000 It's exhausting.

01:12:11.000 What?

01:12:12.000 Why are you following me?

01:12:14.000 Follow, follow, follow.

01:12:16.000 You're following us.

01:12:17.000 Follow, follow, follow, follow.

01:12:20.000 Follow, follow, follow, follow.

01:12:23.000 He's just trying to get the fuck away from her and she says, why are you following me?

01:12:26.000 And then she says, your mama's a bitch. 1.00

01:12:29.000 Hold on, Randy.

01:12:31.000 That's where your mom does. 1.00

01:12:33.000 She's fucking tasting this in the butt because she's a fucking cunt. 1.00

01:12:37.000 Your mother's a four. 1.00

01:12:40.000 Like you.

01:12:41.000 Why are you a follower?

01:12:44.000 Follower.

01:12:48.000 Follower.

01:12:50.000 This is when I'm scared.

01:12:54.000 You wanna fucking fight me?

01:12:56.000 Dude, run. 0.78

01:12:58.000 You're a follower.

01:13:01.000 She starts screaming.

01:13:03.000 She scratches herself.

01:13:05.000 Then the police report says she seemed distressed when they arrived as she's yelling, fuck you pigs, and trying to punch them. 1.00

01:13:16.000 Dude, you're fucking stupid.

01:13:18.000 Get a fucking clue.

01:13:20.000 Oh, no.

01:13:21.000 You gotta keep that thing rolling.

01:13:23.000 If you hit me, fuck out of here.

01:13:26.000 If you hit me, I'm going to smack the shit.

01:13:28.000 No, you're not, dude.

01:13:29.000 You're going to jail.

01:13:32.000 Your son is a fucking broke-ass motherfucker. 0.93

01:13:36.000 He's trying to fucking blame me.

01:13:40.000 Oh, really, Nicole?

01:13:42.000 Like, what?

01:13:43.000 Of course, you have to know.

01:13:44.000 Threw the N-word in there.

01:13:45.000 Had to.

01:13:48.000 She's not going to stop, huh?

01:13:50.000 Bitch. 1.00

01:13:52.000 Don't film drunk women. 0.98

01:13:54.000 No, no.

01:13:55.000 I would say keep the camera rolling.

01:13:57.000 Oh, yeah, I see what you're saying.

01:13:58.000 Well, he's going out of his way, though.

01:14:00.000 Yeah, that's right.

01:14:00.000 To follow her and get her on camera because he thinks it's funny.

01:14:03.000 Yeah, get away.

01:14:03.000 But it's not funny, dude.

01:14:05.000 You will go to fucking prison.

01:14:07.000 Thank God that's true.

01:14:08.000 That doesn't really bode well to the ending of the show.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - December 03, 2019

S02E94 - THIS SHOW SUCKS

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Summary

Transcript