Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S03E27 - TRUMP CARD [2020-10-20 - S03E27 - TRUMP CARD]

00:01:01.000 How do we feel about A C D C Love them Hello folks welcome back to Get Off My Lawn This will be a good episode I realized what had happened yesterday. 1.00

00:01:12.000 I was drinking a lot on Friday and then I woke up hungover and I thought I can't be a bad dad.

00:01:18.000 I gotta play with the kids not see us fathers We can't just sit in Netflix all weekend like some people So I had hair on the dog and then that folded into Saturday Sunday so I hadn't paid the piper until Monday and then I paid the piper and so you were seeing a man have a hangover that was accumulated accumulated over three or four days It's rough.

00:01:42.000 I woke up today with AIDS and then just went back to bed didn't go to the gym and now I'm normal again Especially with my cup of Joe I watched Dinesh D'Souza's movie Trump card last night and I sent you his number see if you can get him on the line.

00:01:59.000 He's doing press for it now and whenever you find him we'll just pop him on.

00:02:03.000 All right, cool.

00:02:04.000 I'm going to tell him about these shirts.

00:02:06.000 You are?

00:02:07.000 So if he's offended, that will be annoying.

00:02:12.000 It might take away the magic of the interview.

00:02:14.000 I wonder how they do.

00:02:15.000 Well, the trick to interviews is if you have anything remotely controversial, you save it to the end.

00:02:20.000 But you can't put on a shirt halfway through an interview.

00:02:24.000 So I'll start out and explain that obviously we love the guy.

00:02:27.000 Come on.

00:02:28.000 You think we're sitting here going, oh, he's from India.

00:02:30.000 Oh, hello, Apu.

00:02:31.000 Oh, dude, like, that's sixth grade.

00:02:37.000 Today's book is What If by Randall Monroe.

00:02:41.000 It was a website where people would say, like, hey, what if you were to like put a drop a T-Rex in that hole from Star Wars?

00:02:55.000 It's pretty good.

00:02:56.000 I don't know.

00:02:57.000 There's some leftiness in there sometimes.

00:02:59.000 But what's fun about it is you can just have it next to something.

00:03:04.000 Yeah, there's things like, without us, Earth's geology would grind on.

00:03:08.000 Winds and rain and blowing sand will dissolve and bury the artifacts of our civilization.

00:03:12.000 Human-caused climate change will probably delay the start of the blah, blah, blah.

00:03:15.000 You see, he throws in little things like that.

00:03:17.000 But the beauty of it is, every day is a different question.

00:03:21.000 Like, what if you were to eat plutonium?

00:03:24.000 So, you know, you can just pick it up whenever you want.

00:03:27.000 It's a good bathroom book.

00:03:28.000 I've only read like 30% of it.

00:03:35.000 And then he goes, our plastic will become...

00:03:38.000 This question is, what will happen like in a million years, in 2 million years, in 10 billion years?

00:03:44.000 What will the Earth look like, blah, blah, blah?

00:03:46.000 But he says, in a million years from now, our plastic will become shredded and buried, and perhaps some microbes will learn to digest it.

00:03:53.000 But in all likelihood, a million years from now, an out-of-place layer of processed hydrocarbons, transported fragments of our shampoo bottles and shampoo bags, will serve as a chemical monument to civilization.

00:04:05.000 Millions of years?

00:04:08.000 I think plastic takes like 40 years.

00:04:10.000 Maybe a thousand if a thick plastic bag.

00:04:14.000 But a normal little skinny plastic bag, I think, is like 45 years.

00:04:17.000 40, 40, 45?

00:04:19.000 45 years.

00:04:21.000 Anyway.

00:04:21.000 40 years, 45 years.

00:04:23.000 All books are written by beta males these days, so you just have to learn to tolerate those things.

00:04:30.000 Top story in the world.

00:04:33.000 Jeffrey Toobin pulls out his crank and starts cranking it.

00:04:40.000 Now, uh... 1.00

00:04:41.000 No, that's not it, you fucking absolute retard. 1.00

00:04:46.000 It is right under Jeffrey. 1.00

00:04:47.000 Got caught way.

00:04:48.000 Oh, yeah, that's a mistake on my part.

00:04:50.000 Poobie-doopy.

00:04:51.000 But show the pic.

00:04:53.000 Not safe for work.

00:04:54.000 Not safe for work.

00:04:56.000 So this isn't it.

00:04:57.000 This is fake.

00:04:58.000 But I'm kind of mad at the internet.

00:05:00.000 Can I see the real thing, please?

00:05:04.000 I had a.

00:05:05.000 Oh, check out.

00:05:06.000 So 1-7.

00:05:08.000 OJ Simpson is not impressed.

00:05:10.000 He thinks that's really tacky.

00:05:14.000 Well, at least he didn't chop some heads off. 1.00

00:05:17.000 Damn! 1.00

00:05:18.000 Jeffrey Toobin! 1.00

00:05:20.000 At least Pee-Wee Herman was in an X-rated movie theater.

00:05:24.000 Theater?

00:05:25.000 Just say it.

00:05:29.000 Can you believe O.J. Simpson is on Twitter?

00:05:33.000 What a world we live in.

00:05:34.000 I can't believe he's not in prison.

00:05:36.000 Like, Charlie Kirk is banned from Twitter.

00:05:38.000 OJ Simpson is not.

00:05:40.000 That's 2020, folks.

00:05:44.000 But look, we do know who he was on with while he was beating off. 0.98

00:05:49.000 Now, you know our views on masturbation. 0.98

00:05:52.000 We think it's bad. 0.99

00:05:53.000 We say you should only ejaculate within a yard of your significant other with her consent. 0.90

00:05:58.000 So if she's pregnant or menstruating, you can still beat your meat, but she should be there because it's good for your relationship. 1.00

00:06:04.000 It strengthens the relationship.

00:06:05.000 And if you're not in a relationship, it gets you off the couch.

00:06:08.000 It gets you talking to gals. 1.00

00:06:10.000 Porn is for simps.

00:06:13.000 But, you know, we all make mistakes.

00:06:15.000 We all fall from grace.

00:06:16.000 But can you, could you beat off at a meeting?

00:06:20.000 No, it's not my thing.

00:06:22.000 Unless it was like the women were insanely hot and it was like a three-hour meeting and you're bored out of your mind and super hungover or something.

00:06:31.000 I don't really get it.

00:06:32.000 Just like the Louis C.K. thing.

00:06:33.000 I never got how...

00:06:36.000 I get that more.

00:06:37.000 yeah, they're younger comedians.

00:06:40.000 Yeah, that's like there's girls there, and they're vulnerable, and you're vulnerable, and you're kind of dominating them, and it's like live porn, and they don't have to do anything, so they're more likely to allow it. 0.99

00:06:49.000 You know, if you said to two girls, hey, can you take your shirts off and start rubbing tits? 1.00

00:06:53.000 About one in a thousand are going to say sure. 0.99

00:06:56.000 But just standing there, you'll probably get one in ten.

00:07:00.000 That's true.

00:07:01.000 That's true.

00:07:02.000 Putting yourself out there.

00:07:03.000 That's true.

00:07:04.000 It seems like they get off on themselves being exposed.

00:07:07.000 It's less the woman themselves. 0.53

00:07:09.000 Some of these people.

00:07:10.000 Yeah, it's.

00:07:13.000 But look at who he was on with.

00:07:16.000 Ooh, a couple of hotties. 0.99

00:07:20.000 Now, here's a crazy thing.

00:07:21.000 I've got a pretty good imagination.

00:07:24.000 Obviously, I don't get that.

00:07:26.000 And that's your granddad in a wig.

00:07:30.000 But this, I can kind of see.

00:07:33.000 Really? 1.00

00:07:33.000 If you're a really depraved pervert and you had a fantasy about her debasing you, because she's a lesbian who hates men, especially white men, right? 1.00

00:07:43.000 And she's putting her finger up your ass or something while you beat off and she spits on you or something, really. 1.00

00:07:48.000 I could see that. 1.00

00:07:49.000 Like, I could kind of see this.

00:07:50.000 If you're into submission, then she's your dominatrix. 0.99

00:07:54.000 And she's this ugly he-man woman. 1.00

00:07:57.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00

00:07:57.000 Who like kicks you and stuff. 1.00

00:07:59.000 And you're like, I'm sorry, mistress. 0.98

00:08:00.000 I'm so gross that she's the one dominating me. 1.00

00:08:03.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:08:04.000 Yeah.

00:08:04.000 Like, what does that say about me if she's not?

00:08:05.000 That's the only thing I can guess because those other two are out. 0.91

00:08:10.000 Or maybe he had porn on.

00:08:14.000 And I'm open to ideas.

00:08:16.000 If you got anything else, let me know.

00:08:21.000 So that really did happen, but that's not the real picture.

00:08:24.000 Correct.

00:08:25.000 Yeah.

00:08:26.000 But we, like, I'm kind of mad at the internet for not digging it up.

00:08:29.000 Yeah.

00:08:30.000 We see everything.

00:08:31.000 Remember Fapgate? 0.68

00:08:33.000 Where we saw all those naked celebrities? 1.00

00:08:35.000 Oh, the Fappening, yeah.

00:08:36.000 The Fappening?

00:08:37.000 I saw everything there.

00:08:38.000 We just saw a man's head on the street.

00:08:40.000 I just saw a pic of a guy's leg on the street.

00:08:44.000 Should I show you that?

00:08:45.000 I don't know.

00:08:46.000 Yeah.

00:08:47.000 Okay, you ready?

00:08:49.000 This is NSFW.

00:08:50.000 It's a guy's leg lying on the road.

00:08:52.000 Turn away for the next 30 seconds if you don't want to barf.

00:08:56.000 This was sent separately?

00:08:57.000 4-8.

00:08:58.000 It's the very last link.

00:08:59.000 Oh.

00:08:59.000 I was going to show it at the end of the show.

00:09:02.000 This is going to be the final video?

00:09:04.000 I don't know if I'm ready.

00:09:06.000 Yeah, you're not good at this kind of stuff.

00:09:07.000 I hate this stuff.

00:09:10.000 So there he is.

00:09:11.000 And there's his leg.

00:09:12.000 God.

00:09:15.000 That doesn't really bother me.

00:09:16.000 I don't know why.

00:09:17.000 You know what?

00:09:17.000 I didn't look at the car.

00:09:18.000 Look at that car.

00:09:19.000 Oh, my God.

00:09:20.000 So I think he was probably going like 80, and he hit the car so hard that he did a spin, and the glass sort of of the back window chopped his leg off.

00:09:30.000 Wow.

00:09:30.000 Because of the velocity.

00:09:33.000 I didn't watch yesterday's video at all.

00:09:35.000 The shooting one?

00:09:36.000 What shooting one?

00:09:37.000 The dead people.

00:09:38.000 Oh, you didn't watch it at all?

00:09:40.000 Not even. 1.00

00:09:40.000 You closed your eyes, you pussy? 1.00

00:09:41.000 I just looked away. 1.00

00:09:42.000 I look at the hard drive.

00:09:44.000 Well, it's kind of hard to explain.

00:09:46.000 This is a lot of the figuring out on this show.

00:09:48.000 But if it's like that motorcyclist negligence, I feel nothing.

00:09:52.000 Like, I can't see a kid get harmed, not even fictionally.

00:09:55.000 Like a character kid in a movie, I have to leave.

00:09:59.000 I'll start crying. 1.00

00:10:00.000 But when it's someone being an asshole, I just think, well, what the fuck? 1.00

00:10:03.000 It's like when junkies overdose, you just go, you fucked up, dumbass. 1.00

00:10:06.000 But when someone innocent is, you know, crossing with the light and they get hit by some dick, drunk driver, it's hard to stomach. 1.00

00:10:14.000 That's how Gary's lovers died. 0.97

00:10:16.000 We'll find that out in this weekend's episode.

00:10:19.000 Both of his ex-lovers died via card and woman.

00:10:23.000 Was Gary around?

00:10:25.000 No.

00:10:26.000 No, it's not one of those. 1.00

00:10:27.000 What, drunk women killed his gay lovers? 1.00

00:10:30.000 One of them was drunk. 1.00

00:10:31.000 The other one was an accident.

00:10:33.000 Isn't that weird?

00:10:34.000 Yeah.

00:10:35.000 That's disturbing.

00:10:36.000 One of them got a year.

00:10:38.000 So, and then with the head, the beheaded guy, that obviously bothers me, but I can handle it because I think this is good because people can see what radical Islam is like. 0.96

00:10:49.000 So I'm glad the picture exists. 0.94

00:10:51.000 Like, you could watch a pedophile being hanged, right? 0.93

00:10:54.000 Yeah. 0.88

00:10:55.000 But Max and John being in prison for four years still makes me dry heave.

00:11:00.000 Makes me nauseous with anxiety.

00:11:04.000 Was that like that with the children thing before you had kids?

00:11:06.000 Nope.

00:11:07.000 Oh, okay.

00:11:08.000 Having kids changes you.

00:11:11.000 Check out Benny Johnson's Instagram.

00:11:14.000 I don't mean like, you don't have to right now, but before he had a kid, he was a hard-working guy.

00:11:20.000 Then he got married.

00:11:21.000 Then his wife got pregnant. 1.00

00:11:23.000 And since then, he's just been fucking grinding, crushing it. 0.99

00:11:26.000 I've already talked about this. 0.99

00:11:28.000 How you get rich if you make a baby.

00:11:32.000 Oh, other exciting news, folks.

00:11:36.000 We finally got the shirts in.

00:11:37.000 It happened yesterday after we were done filming.

00:11:42.000 And I pledge allegiance to the United States of America, one nation, indivisible, under God, for real. 0.99

00:11:50.000 See, this is a good one, because it takes a while for people to realize you're fucking with them. 0.98

00:11:57.000 And, you know, in New York City, you can wear a MAGA hat. 0.99

00:11:59.000 You better be as ripped as me.

00:12:01.000 You better be ready to brawl.

00:12:04.000 But if you're not, you know, if you don't want to wear a Klansman uniform in Harlem, like in Die Hard, then you wear these.

00:12:14.000 And they're a lot more subtle.

00:12:19.000 We hold these truths to be self-evident.

00:12:21.000 All men and women are created by, you know, you know, the thing. 1.00

00:12:24.000 And I think my favorite, those are obviously the hits, right?

00:12:27.000 That's satisfaction and sympathy for the devil.

00:12:30.000 But this is more of a deep cut.

00:12:31.000 And this one I like because it'll take a second.

00:12:34.000 When Trump does follow through or doesn't do would follow through, the exact opposite.

00:12:39.000 He's just so lost when he's saying that.

00:12:43.000 It's just word soup. 0.99

00:12:46.000 Like, it would be fun to try to figure out what the fuck he's trying to say. 0.98

00:12:49.000 When Trump does follow through or doesn't do, would follow through. 0.97

00:12:53.000 So when Trump...

00:12:55.000 Trump says he's going to do something and he never follows through.

00:12:58.000 But the few times he does follow through, He ends up doing the exact opposite of what he said he was going to do.

00:13:03.000 I think that's what he's going for.

00:13:04.000 I'm getting to learn to speak Biden.

00:13:07.000 So the parentheses, Trump, means he said he, right?

00:13:09.000 He didn't just say nothing.

00:13:11.000 Okay.

00:13:11.000 Because that would be worse.

00:13:12.000 When does follow through?

00:13:14.000 Yeah.

00:13:14.000 Yeah, he did say he.

00:13:16.000 That's good.

00:13:18.000 And again, I don't like wearing shirts on the show before I've washed them because they seem kind of blousy.

00:13:24.000 You can see with the toad, you can see it gains formula.

00:13:28.000 These are Haynes beefy tees.

00:13:30.000 Very thick.

00:13:30.000 Great for winter.

00:13:31.000 Very thick cotton.

00:13:32.000 So they gain traction.

00:13:35.000 But like if you wear this at a bar in a liberal part of town, people will be like, oh, cool.

00:13:40.000 Wait a minute. 1.00

00:13:42.000 You fucking... 1.00

00:13:44.000 I won't love it, but I'll kiss it. 1.00

00:13:47.000 We've got a lot of sales.

00:13:52.000 I'll kiss the guys, those big men out there. 0.98

00:13:56.000 It's funny, too, because that's the thing that George Takai did to the Powboys, making them gay. 0.98

00:14:01.000 And the left tries to do that with Trump with these pictures of him kissing Putin. 1.00

00:14:04.000 Like, we give a shit. 1.00

00:14:05.000 He's sitting there on TV saying he's going to kiss guys. 1.00

00:14:08.000 And you're like, yeah, your hero Trump is a gay. 1.00

00:14:13.000 Okay. 1.00

00:14:14.000 That sucks that he married a woman. 1.00

00:14:18.000 They honestly think we have nightmares about gays. 1.00

00:14:21.000 Like, they think it's our biggest fear. 0.99

00:14:24.000 I have dreams about gays. 0.98

00:14:26.000 I wish I was gay. 0.99

00:14:28.000 Now, here's a weird thing. 0.77

00:14:30.000 Are we done, Jeffrey Toobin?

00:14:33.000 Oh, yeah.

00:14:33.000 That's one other thing I wanted to say.

00:14:37.000 Part of me, and this isn't a very popular opinion on the right. 0.99

00:14:41.000 Part of me is like, okay, he fucked up. 1.00

00:14:44.000 It's masturbating. 1.00

00:14:46.000 You know, he wasn't like, you like that, co-workers? 1.00

00:14:48.000 Yeah, look at my balls. 0.99

00:14:50.000 Oh, yeah, Jeffrey Toobin is pumping it. 1.00

00:14:53.000 I'm going to jizz on the camera so it looks like it's melting slime. 1.00

00:14:57.000 You're a whore. 1.00

00:14:58.000 You're a whore. 1.00

00:14:58.000 You're a whore and you want to fuck me. 1.00

00:15:00.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:15:02.000 That, okay, that's rich. 0.81

00:15:05.000 But if he accidentally left his camera on and he was jerking off because you were so boring in a meeting that his mind was wandering, I don't know. 0.99

00:15:16.000 Like, I'm kind of Roger Stonian when it comes to sex. 0.98

00:15:20.000 And if someone has an accident and gets filmed jerking it, why is it the number one topic in the world? 0.60

00:15:28.000 I mean, look at all social media.

00:15:30.000 This is everywhere.

00:15:34.000 I know. 1.00

00:15:34.000 I feel like a pussy not stabbing the beast when he's down. 1.00

00:15:38.000 They stab it with their steely knives. 1.00

00:15:41.000 But is this really us? 0.94

00:15:44.000 Janelle.

00:15:45.000 Oh, there's somebody doctored this.

00:15:48.000 Yeah, I know.

00:15:49.000 I think it's the same one.

00:15:51.000 Janelle family.

00:15:52.000 Should I actually hop on this call since I'm not on this account?

00:15:56.000 It's not a problem.

00:15:58.000 Wait, let me see it.

00:15:58.000 Oh.

00:16:00.000 Page will be on.

00:16:02.000 I'm sorry, we're on page 12, the second graph from the top.

00:16:04.000 Okay.

00:16:05.000 Turn your camera off.

00:16:07.000 All right.

00:16:08.000 So if you look, we're 0.15% higher than 2019.

00:16:12.000 We started this quarter off at 2.75%. 0.99

00:16:15.000 Holy shit. 0.97

00:16:16.000 You know, somebody on the Reddit said this is fake and they linked another video. 0.98

00:16:20.000 They should have a fact checker. 0.98

00:16:25.000 I like how they're talking about a dick coming out like it's an avalanche. 0.99

00:16:29.000 Look, look, he's jumping away from the computer. 1.00

00:16:33.000 Wow.

00:16:34.000 We can't.

00:16:34.000 Oh, hell no.

00:16:36.000 Oh, my God. 1.00

00:16:39.000 Holy shit. 1.00

00:16:43.000 Yeah, that would be my reaction. 1.00

00:16:45.000 I would be laughing my head off.

00:16:48.000 And then I wouldn't even be mad at Jeffrey Toobin. 1.00

00:16:50.000 I would just think, you stupid loser. 1.00

00:16:52.000 Can you believe it? 1.00

00:16:53.000 Even if he was, if I worked with him, I'd be, I'd go, dude, what the fuck? 0.99

00:16:58.000 And he'll go, dude, I know. 0.99

00:17:00.000 It's like Louis C.K. He said, when he did a stand-up, he goes, everyone knows my thing.

00:17:04.000 You're so lucky no one knows your thing.

00:17:06.000 He goes, Obama knows my thing.

00:17:11.000 Oh, that's great.

00:17:12.000 Jeffrey Lubin, frankly.

00:17:14.000 When the groups returned from their breakout rooms, Toobin lowered the camera.

00:17:17.000 The people on the call saw...

00:17:19.000 He called back in, seemingly unaware of what his colleagues have been able to see.

00:17:22.000 Go back.

00:17:23.000 We missed that first part.

00:17:27.000 When the groups returned from their breakout rooms, Toobin lowered the camera.

00:17:30.000 Oh. 1.00

00:17:31.000 Touching his penis. 1.00

00:17:33.000 Oh, so he was caught. 1.00

00:17:36.000 Yeah, guys, if you're going to...

00:17:37.000 Did you not notice that Mark Zuckerberg has sticky tape on his camera on his laptop?

00:17:43.000 I would love to film my wife in lingerie having intercourse with me, but I wouldn't risk it being on the cloud. 0.96

00:17:52.000 Yeah. 0.97

00:17:52.000 I guess I could buy a digital camera. 0.97

00:17:54.000 Remember that movie we watched where everybody's info went out?

00:17:58.000 And it was that chicks movie where I was like, I feel like that's going to happen. 0.92

00:18:02.000 I'm like, I don't care.

00:18:03.000 Whatever.

00:18:04.000 Obviously, I don't care.

00:18:06.000 I look like this.

00:18:07.000 Well, yeah, it's sort of like the word racism, right?

00:18:10.000 It used to be an insult.

00:18:11.000 Now it's just like it means a person that doesn't take me seriously.

00:18:18.000 That's what racist is. 0.99

00:18:19.000 A white supremacist is someone who doesn't take a far-left activist seriously and thinks that person is nuts. 1.00

00:18:26.000 And you are nuts. 1.00

00:18:28.000 So I guess we're all racist now? 1.00

00:18:31.000 Look at 27. 0.99

00:18:34.000 The mental illness is impossible to ignore these days. 0.99

00:18:40.000 Hi, I want to show you what I got as a gift called a damn it doll. 0.99

00:18:49.000 This is what women would do if they had power. 1.00

00:18:51.000 If they were giants, this is how they would treat us. 0.88

00:18:54.000 They'd pick us up by the legs and smash us like something in a Jurassic Park. 0.99

00:18:59.000 Called a damn it doll. 0.98

00:19:00.000 There's a funny tweet about this trend 2-8. 0.99

00:19:05.000 I saw one where they did a symphony of all four of these car girls together.

00:19:08.000 I couldn't find it, though.

00:19:11.000 I have that.

00:19:12.000 I think that's funny.

00:19:14.000 And I was thinking about, you know the one in the middle?

00:19:16.000 No, sorry, the top with the page boy cut?

00:19:19.000 She's mad about Ruth Bader Ginsburg dying.

00:19:21.000 And so you care about feminism and women's rights. 1.00

00:19:26.000 Okay, but you don't care about sexism and Islam.

00:19:29.000 Or you don't care About these women with welfare who have had the family shattered.

00:19:33.000 You have these single moms who are essentially slaves to welfare. 1.00

00:19:38.000 The only subject you seem to care about is Americans' abortions, which to me leads you to the inevitable conclusion that these girls are screaming about Ruth Betty Ginsburg in her car because she wants to be able to fucking get knocked up and kill the baby. 1.00

00:19:56.000 Which is like screaming because you want to be a dumb slut. 1.00

00:20:00.000 That's feminism now? 1.00

00:20:02.000 This thing?

00:20:03.000 Oh, you found it.

00:20:08.000 I hadn't seen that bottom right one or the top left one.

00:20:16.000 Losing our democracy is winning.

00:20:20.000 It's like a little turtle race or something.

00:20:24.000 Oh.

00:20:26.000 Losing our democracy is killing them.

00:20:28.000 Yeah.

00:20:28.000 I'm not even sure who's second.

00:20:30.000 Even with the color, like, visually stands out.

00:20:31.000 Oh, yeah.

00:20:35.000 Yeah, she's the boss. 1.00

00:20:38.000 I mean, we could go on for days with these.

00:20:41.000 What's 3-1?

00:20:42.000 I think it's more of that. 1.00

00:20:50.000 Holy fucking shit, you guys! 1.00

00:20:53.000 I'm driving you, Carl, but I just got a notification that Ruth Bader gets her dumb! 1.00

00:20:58.000 Don't have your notifications on. 0.96

00:21:03.000 This is ancient Chinese secret, but they had some others. 1.00

00:21:10.000 She just wants to be a dumb slut. 1.00

00:21:13.000 This one turns me on, by the way. 1.00

00:21:15.000 I love her mouth.

00:21:17.000 I don't hate the Stephen King 1980s cut.

00:21:21.000 I hate her hair, dude. 1.00

00:21:22.000 But I like when mouths do that Joker thing. 0.99

00:21:24.000 Oh, that natural, like, yeah, little smiley thing.

00:21:28.000 And I like her big teeth. 1.00

00:21:29.000 The alternative is a fucking fascist! 1.00

00:21:32.000 A fascist is a fascist! 1.00

00:21:34.000 Maybe we can have the battle.

00:21:35.000 Tim Heidecker said that yesterday too, did Nick Fuentez?

00:21:37.000 You're supporting a tyrant.

00:21:39.000 Yeah.

00:21:39.000 A tyrant?

00:21:41.000 What's like, that's such a high school thing to say, a tyrant.

00:21:45.000 That's enough.

00:21:47.000 Okay, here's a weird thing.

00:21:49.000 We like to keep the beginning of the show light, right?

00:21:51.000 We want to ease you into it with appetizers, slowly bring you over.

00:21:55.000 But that means we talk about celebrities. 0.92

00:21:58.000 And I hate celebrity culture, and I don't give a shit about celebrities, but I find that the show is best when we include celebrities' opinions of things. 0.93

00:22:07.000 And I remember talking to the dude, Nick Gillespie, at Reason, and he goes, I really want to just do what matters and focus on real culture. 0.98

00:22:15.000 And I go, what do you mean?

00:22:16.000 He goes, like, Britney Spears and TMZ and gossip.

00:22:19.000 And I go, that's more important than, and he goes, okay, do you know who Shirley Temple is?

00:22:24.000 Yeah, she's the good ship lollipop chick. 1.00

00:22:26.000 And he goes, who was the Speaker of the House in 1930?

00:22:30.000 And I'm like, I wouldn't know.

00:22:32.000 That would, no, I've never known.

00:22:35.000 I have never known who that is.

00:22:37.000 And I thought it was a good point.

00:22:39.000 So for some reason, politics is downstream from the culture.

00:22:41.000 It's our own little monarchy.

00:22:42.000 These are our kings and queens and dukes and princesses. 1.00

00:22:47.000 So Christy Alley's in shit. 1.00

00:22:51.000 I was listening to Stern this morning on the way in, and it was just like, God, he's so mad at her. 1.00

00:22:56.000 And they're both so petty, too. 1.00

00:22:58.000 High school shit. 1.00

00:22:59.000 Talking about how she's fat. 1.00

00:23:01.000 And then Robin goes, yeah, and I like how she was going to own it.

00:23:04.000 She did that show Fat Actress. 1.00

00:23:05.000 And then she said, no, no, I'm not going to own it.

00:23:07.000 And then she had to lose wage, started working for Jenny Craig. 1.00

00:23:10.000 She's such a fat bitch. 1.00

00:23:13.000 Like, I think Robin is 60 years old. 1.00

00:23:17.000 And you're calling someone a big fatso.

00:23:19.000 And Robin is not exactly Miss Hourglass. 0.99

00:23:22.000 No, doesn't she put coffee up her butt? 1.00

00:23:24.000 She's a three, two? 1.00

00:23:28.000 Especially now. 0.99

00:23:29.000 Her dad married her mom and was quoted as saying, this is the ugliest woman I've ever dated. 1.00

00:23:38.000 Wow. 0.99

00:23:39.000 About her mom. 0.94

00:23:40.000 He molested her. 0.98

00:23:42.000 But she grew up hating white people because one friend ignored her when they were at a party when she was 12. 0.97

00:23:50.000 And then she became obsessed with Muhammad Ali.

00:23:52.000 I don't know.

00:23:53.000 Her book's really interesting, really weird.

00:23:54.000 Anyway, yeah, so what did she say?

00:23:59.000 She's voting for President Trump again.

00:24:02.000 Hi, I'm Ralphiaversa, and here's one of the stories we're following on Entertain the Production.

00:24:07.000 Really following this?

00:24:09.000 I'm wondering if you're going because he's not a politician.

00:24:17.000 Look at that, Judd Appetow.

00:24:19.000 Shelly Long was way funnier than you. 1.00

00:24:22.000 You know that show you were on 30 years ago?

00:24:24.000 The other chick that was on before you was way funnier. 1.00

00:24:28.000 Bitch. 1.00

00:24:28.000 What followed pretty quickly was the response. 1.00

00:24:30.000 Patricia Arquette said her Biden vote would cancel out Allie's, and Judd Appetow dropped a Shelly Long reference.

00:24:36.000 Long's departure from Cheers cleared the way for Allie. 0.92

00:24:39.000 So hot on that show.

00:24:40.000 And then she's kind of too handsome for me.

00:24:43.000 Yeah.

00:24:44.000 A huge, strong chin, a Germanic, kind of dominant face.

00:24:48.000 I like Cuter more.

00:24:51.000 But that didn't stop her from calling one dissenter, Dumbelina.

00:24:55.000 It also didn't stop her.

00:24:56.000 How dare she retaliate. 0.54

00:25:03.000 They used to want an autograph, now they want a picture, and it's not called interacting.

00:25:07.000 It's someone's asking you questions and you're answering them.

00:25:10.000 So I love the idea of Twitter because I could actually, even if it's just mundane things, I would go like, what are you eating?

00:25:16.000 Ellie also said that Twitter has allowed her to vocalize her politics more.

00:25:19.000 Whether that's a good or bad thing probably depends on who you're asking.

00:25:23.000 Those people with those 8x10s, they sell them on eBay.

00:25:28.000 What a lame thing to do.

00:25:30.000 MLB at spring training, at the Mets, spring training, the adults are always complaining. 0.99

00:25:36.000 We bring all balls here and they won't fucking pay any attention to us. 0.98

00:25:39.000 I'm done with the Mets. 1.00

00:25:40.000 I'm done with them.

00:25:42.000 Meanwhile, my son has a dozen signed balls. 0.84

00:25:45.000 They just don't like adults because they know they're selling it on eBay.

00:25:48.000 Kids put them.

00:25:49.000 My son has a whole case. 0.99

00:25:51.000 Although I fucking caught him playing baseball with some of the balls we got in spring training. 0.98

00:25:57.000 Not signed ones, but ones that we, fouls We caught or something. 0.99

00:26:01.000 I go, dude, I'll buy you baseballs.

00:26:03.000 Don't get high in our own supply.

00:26:05.000 And he goes, I could sell one of these for 800 bucks. 1.00

00:26:09.000 If you do, I'll kill you. 0.99

00:26:10.000 Why am I going to spring training with you if you're becoming one of those old eBay people? 0.99

00:26:16.000 And I remember being with like David Cross.

00:26:19.000 I like to name drop him every episode.

00:26:20.000 And there's all these people signing.

00:26:22.000 They have his 8x10.

00:26:23.000 He's happily signing them.

00:26:24.000 I go, dude, those aren't fans.

00:26:26.000 Those are people who are selling them. 1.00

00:26:28.000 It's a stupid business. 1.00

00:26:30.000 And what in the fuck is an autograph? 1.00

00:26:33.000 I get boys collecting them. 0.99

00:26:35.000 I get boys collecting baseballs.

00:26:36.000 That makes sense to me.

00:26:38.000 But an adult?

00:26:41.000 Hey, I was near Eric Estrada for 40 seconds.

00:26:44.000 Look, what a reference.

00:26:46.000 Here's a picture.

00:26:47.000 No, not even a picture.

00:26:49.000 Here's him writing his name.

00:26:51.000 And you go, so you guys were friends?

00:26:53.000 No.

00:26:53.000 I was just near him for four seconds.

00:26:56.000 Yeah, but I would say 10 million people have been near him for four seconds.

00:27:00.000 I mean, he's ridden the subway.

00:27:01.000 He's been in crowds.

00:27:02.000 What's your point? 1.00

00:27:05.000 Same with the fucking selfies. 1.00

00:27:07.000 Every time I do one, anytime I go to anything remotely conservative, I got to do selfies. 0.99

00:27:11.000 And I always say to him, what are you going to do with this?

00:27:12.000 And they go, put it on Facebook.

00:27:14.000 And what does it mean on Facebook?

00:27:16.000 I stood next to Gavin.

00:27:17.000 Okay.

00:27:19.000 So?

00:27:20.000 I gave those up.

00:27:22.000 I remember giving those up at Compound.

00:27:24.000 I was like, I'm just going to not.

00:27:26.000 Yeah, you were one of these people.

00:27:27.000 Yeah.

00:27:28.000 And what would you do with them?

00:27:29.000 Nothing.

00:27:30.000 Just post them on my story.

00:27:31.000 Not even post them.

00:27:32.000 Post them.

00:27:34.000 I stood next to a guy.

00:27:35.000 What do you think?

00:27:37.000 One time I was at a bar.

00:27:38.000 Sorry, I mentioned my nose so much.

00:27:40.000 My mustache is going into it. 0.64

00:27:42.000 I was at a bar and I was feeling brave because I was with my Indian brother-in-law who's approximately nine feet tall and built like a brick shithouse. 1.00

00:27:50.000 And this guy's puts his helmet on the bar, which is irritating.

00:27:53.000 Put it on the ground or somewhere else.

00:27:55.000 You're taking up bar space and you have a motorcycle.

00:27:58.000 Cool.

00:27:59.000 And then he goes, check this out.

00:28:01.000 I don't know him.

00:28:02.000 And he shows me a picture of him.

00:28:04.000 He's in the front row at a Rolling Stones concert.

00:28:06.000 And Mick Jagger is as close as you are to me right now.

00:28:10.000 Wow.

00:28:11.000 That's actually kind of impressive.

00:28:13.000 What?

00:28:13.000 It doesn't mean anything, but that's...

00:28:14.000 That's impressive?

00:28:15.000 What's impressive about it?

00:28:17.000 Carcut tickets.

00:28:18.000 No, it was standing.

00:28:20.000 I could tell by the hands. 1.00

00:28:23.000 And I just looked and I went, you're fucking boring. 1.00

00:28:26.000 You're boring. 1.00

00:28:29.000 That's what you are. 0.99

00:28:30.000 You bore people.

00:28:31.000 And I was thinking the other day, that's my only beef with people is boring. 0.98

00:28:35.000 You can be anything outside of pedophile.

00:28:38.000 But I'm up for anything. 0.95

00:28:39.000 But boring, I can't take it.

00:28:41.000 Sorry.

00:28:41.000 I don't have enough time to sit here and be bored.

00:28:44.000 Talk about the weather or the fact that you were near Mick Jagger.

00:28:48.000 What? 1.00

00:28:50.000 I know a girl who was dating Mick Jagger and he fell asleep in her cunt. 1.00

00:28:54.000 Now that's interesting. 1.00

00:28:55.000 While he was eating her out, just...

00:28:59.000 I mean, must be 75.

00:29:01.000 Probably feels good.

00:29:05.000 Probably vibrates the bean.

00:29:07.000 Vibrates the bean.

00:29:08.000 Hi, welcome back where Vibrates the Bean.

00:29:10.000 This is our first show at Mercury Lounge.

00:29:12.000 Just gonna send it!

00:29:15.000 Look at 1-4.

00:29:16.000 What did she say?

00:29:17.000 I love how totally mild politics are the most controversial thing.

00:29:22.000 I'm really tired of career politicians. 0.99

00:29:24.000 Who the fuck isn't? 0.99

00:29:25.000 I'm tired of paying people to do nothing, and they take way too long to do it. 0.99

00:29:31.000 That's so middle-of-the-road normal.

00:29:34.000 It's not conservative.

00:29:36.000 And that's a really good part of Dinesh D'Souza's movie, by the way.

00:29:40.000 Because he breaks down all of Hunter's crimes.

00:29:42.000 Have you got a hold of him yet?

00:29:44.000 We don't.

00:29:45.000 Okay, well, get on that because it makes me look unprofessional.

00:29:50.000 Also, 50 Cent.

00:29:52.000 I mean, it makes for a good show.

00:29:55.000 He's a famous rapper. 0.99

00:29:56.000 But does anyone give a shit what 50 Cent thinks about anything? 0.99

00:30:02.000 Can he read? 1.00

00:30:05.000 He's a thug from East New York, the most dangerous place on earth. 0.96

00:30:08.000 There's more than a murder a day.

00:30:10.000 I think we're up to 500 this year in East New York.

00:30:14.000 But this is newsworthy and this is relevant because the Dems need the black vote.

00:30:19.000 Without it, they're nothing. 0.99

00:30:21.000 Is he eating a piece of poo there?

00:30:24.000 I don't believe so.

00:30:25.000 I don't even look at the picture, but I'm going to guess no.

00:30:29.000 So that's relevant because it makes the Dems unhappy. 0.74

00:30:32.000 So much of the news and of stuff that we care about is because it makes the liberals go insane. 0.81

00:30:38.000 Likes, they're not already insane enough. 0.89

00:30:41.000 Why do we keep making these people crazier and crazier? 0.96

00:30:43.000 I can't resist.

00:30:44.000 I'm sorry.

00:30:45.000 This makes you scream.

00:30:46.000 I can't not do it.

00:30:47.000 It's a Scottish thing.

00:30:49.000 We find out what your phobias are, what your fears are, and then we dig in the penknife and we twist and twist.

00:30:54.000 I think this background's getting too cluttered.

00:30:58.000 The button?

00:30:58.000 Yeah, the button should be on the desk, no?

00:31:00.000 Yeah, and the Melania, two mugs.

00:31:04.000 All right.

00:31:06.000 I like what Ben Shapiro said about Kanye when Kanye came out.

00:31:09.000 He said, yeah, it seems good, but live by the Kanye, die by the Kanye.

00:31:14.000 And who knows what he's going to say next.

00:31:16.000 Right, Trump?

00:31:16.000 Oh, no.

00:31:17.000 Huge, huge mistake.

00:31:20.000 Oh, huge mistake back in Kanye.

00:31:22.000 I can't believe Kanye cannot run for president because he arrived late.

00:31:27.000 He submitted his whatever you call it, late.

00:31:32.000 He missed the deadline to become president of the United States.

00:31:35.000 Did you see in Biden's town hall, there was a black guy who couldn't ask his question because he was stuck in traffic?

00:31:43.000 Oh.

00:31:43.000 Oh, you mean late?

00:31:45.000 So the moderator read it for him, and I think they showed a picture of him or something. 1.00

00:31:51.000 How stupid is that? 0.99

00:31:57.000 Also in celebrity news, the happy days are having a reunion. 1.00

00:32:02.000 And the cast is all going to get together.

00:32:03.000 Not Scott Bayo.

00:32:05.000 He's not invited.

00:32:06.000 See, they do this thing where they say, we're meeting for democracy.

00:32:09.000 Hold on with that.

00:32:11.000 And we want to promote democracy, democracy now.

00:32:14.000 But they don't mean that.

00:32:15.000 They mean vote for the left.

00:32:18.000 So Scott Bayo's not invited to this.

00:32:20.000 It's got nothing to do with democracy.

00:32:21.000 It's got to do with promoting Biden or thwarting Trump.

00:32:23.000 But they did this before with Obama.

00:32:26.000 It's one of the queerest things in the world.

00:32:28.000 Let's go there now.

00:32:35.000 Sorry, guys, but Happy Days was about family values, wholesomeness.

00:32:40.000 Guys who aren't bald.

00:32:42.000 Wow.

00:32:43.000 Oh, no, no.

00:32:45.000 Sure, Fons. 1.00

00:32:46.000 Hey, how did your date go with the Rodriguez twins?

00:32:49.000 Sure, please.

00:32:50.000 Ah, gee, Fons. 1.00

00:32:51.000 I sure hope our country gets itself back on track.

00:32:53.000 You know, I'd say some eight years ago, I thought to myself, okay, we got these presidents of the United States.

00:32:58.000 She was pretty Italian. 1.00

00:33:00.000 We should give him a shot.

00:33:02.000 Was I rude?

00:33:04.000 I was so rude.

00:33:07.000 You were wrong, Fons? 1.00

00:33:08.000 Okay, that's the word.

00:33:10.000 But see, now we can.

00:33:11.000 You think they got the same jacket?

00:33:12.000 It looks like you're it.

00:33:14.000 You want a double take?

00:33:15.000 My friend Janet Patowski.

00:33:17.000 She's got this girlfriend. 1.00

00:33:20.000 Yeah, or it's in a museum. 0.95

00:33:21.000 Or does he and do you think he ever fucks his wife as the Fons? 1.00

00:33:25.000 Hell yeah. 0.99

00:33:26.000 Really?

00:33:27.000 On her request.

00:33:28.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:33:28.000 Yeah, he doesn't want to do that.

00:33:29.000 No, it's humiliating.

00:33:31.000 But, you know, men will do anything to get laid. 1.00

00:33:34.000 Alaska.

00:33:35.000 You mean the girl who shoots moose?

00:33:38.000 Wait a minute.

00:33:39.000 Shoots moose?

00:33:42.000 I thought she said she was loose.

00:33:46.000 Whoa. 0.99

00:33:46.000 She's making vagina jokes about Sarah Palin now? 0.99

00:33:50.000 Yikes. 1.00

00:33:50.000 And then look. 1.00

00:33:51.000 And vote with your heart, your mind, and with courage and vision.

00:33:57.000 That's all hands.

00:34:00.000 You think when Fonzie votes and like the machine doesn't work, he just knocks it with his elbow?

00:34:06.000 Up your nose with a rubber hose.

00:34:07.000 Oh, that's uh, that's the sweat hogs. 1.00

00:34:10.000 Yeah, that's uh Travolta.

00:34:12.000 So much of that 80s, the 1980s, 50s revival was Jewish people basically being sambos of Italians. 0.99

00:34:22.000 Hey, I'm Italian. 1.00

00:34:24.000 What the fuck? 0.99

00:34:26.000 You know, this is one of the oldest sambos. 1.00

00:34:30.000 Now, I want to take this away from my desk and give it to you, but you have to understand bobbleheads are the most fragile things on God's green earth. 0.97

00:34:39.000 True.

00:34:39.000 More than waterford crystal, more than Fabergé eggs.

00:34:43.000 If you let a pencil fall on this, it will chip.

00:34:46.000 I won't.

00:34:46.000 I don't know why.

00:34:48.000 Why do they design these things to be so fragile?

00:34:50.000 I don't have a bobblehead that isn't broken.

00:34:54.000 Yeah, true.

00:34:55.000 It's just a spring and two pieces of...

00:34:57.000 But it's this really fragile ceramic.

00:35:00.000 Maybe that has to be ceramic in order for it to bobble?

00:35:03.000 It's like holding a baby.

00:35:05.000 One of the Otis holdings.

00:35:07.000 It would have been the best thing if it just dropped and shattered.

00:35:10.000 I would have broke it on purpose if it was anything like Trump.

00:35:13.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:35:16.000 Speaking of reunions, the Avengers are getting together to support Biden.

00:35:23.000 Isn't that cool? 0.96

00:35:25.000 So much cool shit going on on the Biden side. 0.99

00:35:28.000 We will have Don Cheadle, Chris Evans. 1.00

00:35:31.000 Chris Evans, by the way, who is such a pussy. 1.00

00:35:34.000 You know that Jewish girl who had the Netflix special with the gigantic schnaz? 1.00

00:35:38.000 And there was no jokes in it.

00:35:40.000 It was all just about her grandmother telling her she's beautiful and how she feels awkward and she's sort of horny sometimes.

00:35:46.000 It's terrible.

00:35:47.000 I forget her name, Julianne.

00:35:48.000 It's part of affirmative action in comedy. 0.63

00:35:51.000 Jenny Slate.

00:35:52.000 Yeah, that sounds right.

00:35:53.000 Let me see her.

00:35:54.000 Yeah, they split a while ago.

00:35:57.000 Yes. 1.00

00:35:58.000 So I heard through the grapevine that she dumped him because he was too much of a pussy. 1.00

00:36:05.000 Now, this is a lefty in Hollywood. 0.99

00:36:07.000 Oh, by the way, in Dinesh's movie, they explain why Hollywood is so radical and weird.

00:36:12.000 Because a lot of these people were gay or ostracized or too weak or bullied.

00:36:18.000 So they go to LA, they get into acting in Hollywood, and then they can be the bullies and they can get revenge.

00:36:23.000 So they call it revenge of the hurt. 0.99

00:36:27.000 So Chris Evans was probably this pussy drama club kid. 1.00

00:36:31.000 And he goes there, an ugly Jewish girl gets Captain America, but she still wants to be banged. 1.00

00:36:37.000 And he's just not doing it. 0.99

00:36:39.000 He probably won't even let her blow him because he feels like it's sexist. 1.00

00:36:44.000 And so she dumped Captain America for being a pussy. 1.00

00:36:47.000 But I love how they all think that this is cool to anyone over the age of 13. 1.00

00:36:55.000 Scarlett Johansson, Paul Rudd, Paul Dudd, Zoe Seldana.

00:37:00.000 Who is she again? 0.93

00:37:01.000 Was she the one in Guardians of the Galaxy that was green?

00:37:04.000 Green Lady. 0.99

00:37:04.000 And then my favorite pussy of all time, outside of my wife's, Mark Ruffalo. 0.99

00:37:10.000 Someone said, do you want to go down on your wife or lick Mark Ruffalo? 1.00

00:37:14.000 I'd be like, how long do I have to make a decision? 0.98

00:37:19.000 Mark Ruffalo.

00:37:20.000 Remember that?

00:37:21.000 Amazing.

00:37:25.000 It'll be so hard to find, but they were in front of Trump Tower.

00:37:28.000 I think it was Julia Roberts and like Tim Robinson and Mark Ruffalo.

00:37:35.000 And they were singing spiritual songs of unit with their little hats on, their little scarves.

00:37:42.000 And they had candles.

00:37:45.000 I think that's it.

00:37:46.000 Oh, really?

00:37:47.000 And they were singing like Give Peace a Chance or Amazing Grace.

00:37:51.000 And Mark Ruffalo's face, you can tell when you look into his eyes that there's absolutely nothing there.

00:37:58.000 Nothing.

00:37:59.000 Like, I bet if you went up to Mark Ruffalo with a cat toy, like a long little wire with a thing on the end and you're like, hi, Mark, he would follow it wherever you want.

00:38:08.000 You could lead him onto the highway.

00:38:11.000 Yeah, it was those two.

00:38:12.000 Have they taken it down because it exceeded all gayness? 1.00

00:38:16.000 There's too much cringe on the internet.

00:38:18.000 It broke the internet.

00:38:19.000 It was so cringe.

00:38:20.000 Why wouldn't you look up videos?

00:38:22.000 There it is.

00:38:24.000 Oh, I'm so glad you found it.

00:38:26.000 Let's see here.

00:38:29.000 Hey, I'm heading outside of Trump Tower.

00:38:38.000 He's been a leader for a long time now.

00:38:41.000 People trying to make this country a little bit more.

00:38:45.000 You too, buddy.

00:38:46.000 Thank you.

00:38:46.000 Thank you for the visitors.

00:38:47.000 I like Kibble.

00:38:49.000 Thanks for watching, man.

00:38:50.000 For years of your service.

00:38:52.000 And what?

00:38:54.000 Wow.

00:38:54.000 He's a war event now.

00:38:56.000 The culture war.

00:38:57.000 He gets a purple heart.

00:38:58.000 Dude, I almost thanked a doorman for his service because it looks like a naval dress uniform.

00:39:06.000 We're going to walk the next three blocks down to walk three entire blocks?

00:39:12.000 We can, so he can hear us.

00:39:13.000 We want him to hear us.

00:39:14.000 We want him to know that in a minute.

00:39:16.000 Oh my god.

00:39:17.000 He's Martin Short in half wits.

00:39:20.000 My teeth and everything.

00:39:22.000 Trying to get through high school.

00:39:24.000 I have certain goals in my life that I am determined to achieve.

00:39:28.000 I would like to be a brain surgeon.

00:39:31.000 I haven't quite graduated high school.

00:39:35.000 That's who he is.

00:39:37.000 What are you doing?

00:39:39.000 Why wouldn't you be in videos?

00:39:41.000 We've seen it so many times in the show.

00:39:43.000 We've literally watched it about seven.

00:39:46.000 We're not watching the whole thing.

00:39:47.000 Just go right to him.

00:39:49.000 What exactly?

00:39:50.000 I don't have time for that.

00:39:51.000 4-3.

00:39:52.000 There.

00:39:53.000 That's.

00:39:54.000 There he is.

00:39:54.000 That's Mark Ruffalo.

00:39:56.000 Mark Ruffalo is at a candlelight vigil.

00:39:59.000 Listen to the question, people.

00:40:01.000 I'm looking for articles of clothing.

00:40:03.000 That answer was incorrect.

00:40:06.000 Blanche Rain.

00:40:07.000 Okay, that's enough.

00:40:08.000 Wait, no, go back to when he's talking to him.

00:40:11.000 So people can see the way he talks.

00:40:14.000 No, no, it's forward, forward.

00:40:15.000 It's after Blanche, obviously.

00:40:16.000 Goes right to left.

00:40:17.000 There we go.

00:40:19.000 Left, right.

00:40:20.000 Right.

00:40:20.000 Oh, Alex.

00:40:21.000 Postgraduate work?

00:40:23.000 No, high school.

00:40:24.000 I'm having some degree of difficulty getting through high school.

00:40:28.000 I see.

00:40:29.000 Well, good to have you.

00:40:30.000 I'm sure you will, Lawrence.

00:40:32.000 Because I have certain goals in life I feel compelled to complete.

00:40:35.000 His eyes and his teeth and everything.

00:40:38.000 Yeah.

00:40:40.000 I'm heading outside a Trump Tower.

00:40:42.000 I don't know about you, but...

00:40:43.000 Wow.

00:40:44.000 All this Nazi stuff. 0.55

00:40:45.000 Oh, my God.

00:40:49.000 All this Nazi stuff. 0.76

00:40:51.000 He's a cat.

00:40:53.000 A cat and Martin Lawrence.

00:40:56.000 Martin Short, whatever his name is, the character.

00:40:58.000 Had a baby.

00:41:00.000 You too, buddy.

00:41:00.000 Thank you, man.

00:41:01.000 Thank you for your service.

00:41:03.000 And sacrifice.

00:41:04.000 Service and sacrifice.

00:41:05.000 But you got, I want to see the thing where he's singing.

00:41:08.000 Because his face, when the person's singing, he's just like, those are sounds.

00:41:14.000 I like it.

00:41:16.000 I like the sounds.

00:41:18.000 Let's see here.

00:41:19.000 Mark Ruffalo, Trump Tower song, Candlelight.

00:41:24.000 If I was him and I was his publicist, I would spend $100,000 on lawyers erasing it from the internet. 0.99

00:41:31.000 I would actually just say, Mark, you got to get off fucking social media, dude. 0.99

00:41:36.000 You're not the Hulk. 1.00

00:41:38.000 You're embarrassing us.

00:41:39.000 You're never going to get a job.

00:41:42.000 A multicultural country.

00:41:45.000 You.

00:41:46.000 We all come from someplace else.

00:41:50.000 We are all colors.

00:41:54.000 We are America.

00:41:56.000 Yeah, he looks like his gowns.

00:42:02.000 Look, their candlelights are electric too.

00:42:04.000 The candles are the IKEA ones that are...

00:42:06.000 You turn on, they're jiggling around in there.

00:42:12.000 How long are you going to say this for, Mark?

00:42:15.000 We hate the KKK!

00:42:17.000 He hate the KKK!

00:42:19.000 Yeah, I haven't seen this before.

00:42:21.000 A life of American that was killed by a Nazi on American soil.

00:42:26.000 Let's say her name so Donald Trump can hear what's happened here.

00:42:31.000 He's allowed these people. 0.85

00:42:33.000 He's allowed fascists.

00:42:34.000 Ezra sums this up.

00:42:35.000 He goes, these people see themselves in movies saying something profound and they think they're profound. 0.97

00:42:40.000 So then they start talking and garbage comes out. 0.88

00:42:42.000 And they're like, wait.

00:42:43.000 Yeah, you need a script to be profound. 1.00

00:42:46.000 You need a writer, dumbass. 1.00

00:42:48.000 Wow. 1.00

00:42:49.000 So you don't have the song, though?

00:42:51.000 Oh, that looks like it.

00:42:52.000 This one?

00:42:53.000 Yeah.

00:42:58.000 No, it's different.

00:43:04.000 Oh, man, I want to see that singing.

00:43:05.000 We hate the KKK in Manhattan, in Midtown. 1.00

00:43:10.000 They are telling each other how much they hate the fucking KKK. 1.00

00:43:16.000 Like, why don't you hate something that exists in your world? 1.00

00:43:19.000 I'm sure there's a rapist somewhere. 0.99

00:43:21.000 I'm sure there's a pedophile in your circle of friends somewhere. 1.00

00:43:24.000 A KKK member is never going to cross your path in any way, shape, or form. 0.88

00:43:29.000 I promise you.

00:43:31.000 You will never ever meet anyone from the KKK.

00:43:37.000 What are you looking up there?

00:43:38.000 Trying to find some singing here.

00:43:40.000 Just to look at the longest video.

00:43:45.000 Yeah, I think Olivia Wilde is singing a song. 0.94

00:43:52.000 You know what Mark Buffalo did?

00:43:53.000 I've told this to you before, but maybe you don't watch every episode.

00:43:56.000 I used to have a place upstate in Eldred, New York, just on the border of Pennsylvania.

00:44:01.000 And there's a lot of fracking going on there.

00:44:03.000 Fracking is safe.

00:44:04.000 It's not a thing.

00:44:06.000 There's been one or two accidents.

00:44:07.000 Sorry.

00:44:08.000 We got 80% of our natural gas from fracking.

00:44:10.000 And it's ethical gas.

00:44:11.000 It's not from the Middle East. 0.96

00:44:12.000 No pedophiles, no women hanged, no throwing gays off buildings. 0.96

00:44:16.000 It's from here. 0.98

00:44:17.000 So it's good.

00:44:18.000 And we're more energy independent.

00:44:20.000 I thought that's what you wanted.

00:44:21.000 But there is a snowball's chance in hell there'll be an accident and infect the water table.

00:44:24.000 Because Mark lives there, he was my neighbor, not my neighbor neighbor, but that vicinity. 0.99

00:44:29.000 He doesn't like the idea of his beautiful vacation home being sullied with that kind of shit. 0.98

00:44:35.000 So he lobbied hard, used his celebrity, used his everything to have that banned. 0.99

00:44:40.000 Now, there are zero jobs up there.

00:44:43.000 You should see the soil.

00:44:44.000 There's no farming, nothing.

00:44:46.000 It's this weird part.

00:44:47.000 I guess it's the end of like the glaciers where all the rocks piled up.

00:44:51.000 If I was digging a hole for a tree sometimes, I would bring a pickaxe and nothing else.

00:44:56.000 I would go down, pick out all the rocks, put the tree in there, then put the rocks back and see what little soil I could accrue, water the shit out of it for four weeks, hoping the roots would take.

00:45:06.000 So it's never had jobs. 0.90

00:45:07.000 It's a very impoverished area.

00:45:08.000 That's why I moved there because I'm cheap and I could have a mansion for nothing.

00:45:13.000 So the kids, all the young men there would have loved to work at a fracking mine.

00:45:18.000 They would have loved to get involved in gas.

00:45:20.000 They'd love to be employed. 0.96

00:45:21.000 But they didn't.

00:45:21.000 So where do they go?

00:45:22.000 To Afghanistan.

00:45:23.000 Now, I'm not saying being a Marine is bad and what a horrible thing it is to go serve your country.

00:45:29.000 It's obviously the bravest thing you can do.

00:45:32.000 But I just think it's interesting that this peacenick gave the locals no choice but to go to war.

00:45:40.000 My neighbor across the way, his son had been to Afghanistan like three times and he was probably 20.

00:45:47.000 Again, there's nothing wrong with going to Afghanistan, but let's leave people options, okay? 0.99

00:45:52.000 You shouldn't have to go to Afghanistan.

00:45:55.000 We don't have the draft anymore.

00:45:57.000 But we do if you live near Mark Ruffalo, the vapid animal.

00:46:02.000 You got them singing yet?

00:46:03.000 I have them versus a Trump protester.

00:46:12.000 This is right after he was elected.

00:46:18.000 Oh, there he is.

00:46:19.000 Look at his face.

00:46:20.000 He's Martin.

00:46:23.000 Lauren.

00:46:24.000 Jennifer Justice!

00:46:31.000 This is one of the most embarrassing things in the universe.

00:46:33.000 The eye-opening.

00:46:43.000 It's brutal.

00:46:48.000 Trump is not America.

00:46:50.000 Trump is not America.

00:46:52.000 We love America.

00:46:54.000 We love America.

00:46:56.000 So do we.

00:46:59.000 That was so good, Olivia Wilde.

00:47:02.000 Didn't she do a great job? 1.00

00:47:04.000 Yeah.

00:47:04.000 That was really, really impressive.

00:47:06.000 I'm so proud of her. 1.00

00:47:08.000 Holy shit. 1.00

00:47:09.000 Imagine a world where Michael Moore was the coolest, smartest, most together person at your little fucking parade. 1.00

00:47:15.000 He was the least cringe person there. 0.98

00:47:19.000 Also in the news, Jordan Peterson is back.

00:47:24.000 He's been gone for about a year.

00:47:27.000 Just in time for the election.

00:47:30.000 As some of you may know, but others will not.

00:47:32.000 I'm a bond of it.

00:47:33.000 It's been a long while since I put up any new bond.

00:47:36.000 Dude, you're a mustache.

00:47:37.000 You have a perfect face for a mustache.

00:47:39.000 I've been suffering from impaired health, severely impaired health, as a consequence of benzodiazepine use for anxiety or more accurately from a combination of using that medication and then ceasing its use once I realized it was dangerous.

00:48:03.000 That's put me in and out of hospitals.

00:48:05.000 What are benzos?

00:48:06.000 For much of the next year in Connecticut, in the United States, in Toronto, in Canada, in Moscow, in Russia, and in Belgrade, Serbia.

00:48:19.000 As my family searched for specialists who could aid me in the severe post-use withdrawal and neurological damage-related consequences of both the benzodiazepine use and its cessation.

00:48:39.000 I wonder if it's like heroin.

00:48:42.000 I mean, the withdrawals.

00:48:43.000 The withdrawals for heroin are 10 days of your skin on fire.

00:48:48.000 People die of it.

00:48:49.000 I thought the come down from benzos is like depression and then you kind of like a wave of depression and stuff like that.

00:48:57.000 Yeah, but it's physically painful too because your body stops releasing endorphins because you do it synthetically, so they don't need to.

00:49:04.000 You always feel good at all times.

00:49:06.000 So then when you stop, you're basically covered in third-degree burns.

00:49:15.000 So he's part of this opioid epidemic.

00:49:17.000 It's lucky he lived through it.

00:49:19.000 Insomnia, anxiety, poor concentration, loss of sex drive, depression, mood swings. 0.99

00:49:23.000 Am I a dick? 0.97

00:49:24.000 I'm sorry to be so contrarian today and to be defending Jeffrey Toobin, but like you're a father, dude. 0.92

00:49:31.000 You're an important figure.

00:49:33.000 Can you not?

00:49:34.000 What about you, Gavin? 1.00

00:49:35.000 You're drunk all the time, fucking Pebbleder. 1.00

00:49:37.000 Yeah, that's not great, but in Scotland, drinking a lot is pretty normal. 1.00

00:49:43.000 It's basically my genetic heritage.

00:49:45.000 I'm not...

00:49:46.000 My kids have never seen me drunk.

00:49:48.000 You always get stuff done, too.

00:49:50.000 It's like you go boxing, you wake up earlier than I do, and I don't drink, really.

00:49:55.000 It's pretty impressive.

00:49:57.000 Yeah, and I'm never slurring.

00:49:59.000 Like, I could drink half a bottle of bourbon, and I'll either be normal, normal, normal, and then fall asleep.

00:50:06.000 Anyway, does he got anything else to say?

00:50:10.000 I love that blazer.

00:50:12.000 That's good.

00:50:12.000 Some things during that trying time, I suppose, or at least I can tell you what kept me going during what was certainly the worst period of my life.

00:50:23.000 Let me guess, your room was messy.

00:50:25.000 Family, that's for sure.

00:50:28.000 Friends, and the work I was able to continue doing, as I was able to continue writing, something that I'll talk about probably within the next month.

00:50:41.000 My family, my wife, Tammy, my son, Julian, and his wife, Jillian, and my daughter, Michaela, and her husband, Arnold. 0.99

00:50:49.000 My daughter, the fucking smoke show. 0.98

00:50:52.000 Value to me and provided me with tremendous support during this period. 1.00

00:50:56.000 Michaela and Andre.

00:50:58.000 Okay, boring, we get the idea.

00:50:59.000 Is he still in Russia?

00:51:01.000 I don't know.

00:51:01.000 No, I heard some gossip about him that may or may not be true.

00:51:05.000 There's like this cabal of Texas billionaires that love Trump and they want to fund people who will red pill young people and get them, you know, anti-government and stop this wave of liberalism.

00:51:17.000 I'm not part of the club because I'm too controversial, but if you don't swear and you're not wasted and you're a good Christian, they'll throw like $100 million at you. 0.99

00:51:27.000 So I've heard through the grapevine that he has, he is fucking loaded. 0.99

00:51:31.000 Maybe that's what got him to be a drug addict. 0.99

00:51:33.000 Some people can't handle money.

00:51:35.000 Like they can't handle the notion of money.

00:51:37.000 I'm cheap, so I just put it all away in the bank. 0.98

00:51:40.000 But someone like Hunter Biden is like, I got, I'm making fucking $30 million a year. 0.95

00:51:46.000 I got to go in a plane. 0.98

00:51:47.000 And then you're taking a private jet somewhere, and then all these hot chicks want to go with you. 1.00

00:51:50.000 You're like, come on in.

00:51:52.000 And then they have Coke, and you're like, let's do Coke and crack.

00:51:55.000 I mean, why not?

00:51:58.000 He has all these no-show jobs.

00:52:00.000 Only has to pop in like twice a week.

00:52:02.000 You got nothing but time, nothing but money. 0.99

00:52:05.000 Eventually, a rail goes to crack, goes to mess, and two girlfriends goes to prostitutes, goes to orgies, and then you're just fucking wrecked. 0.99

00:52:18.000 You know why rich people become drug addicts? 0.99

00:52:20.000 Because they can.

00:52:23.000 Keith Richards seemed to work it out all, okay?

00:52:27.000 All right.

00:52:30.000 Also in the news, Chadwick Moore, our own Chadwick Moore, did this really cool video that I...

00:52:39.000 It never really occurred to me before he did this.

00:52:42.000 That gay Inc. 1.00

00:52:46.000 has one political side.

00:52:49.000 All the rainbow coalitions, and he talks about like 50 of them, they're all anti-Trump. 0.95

00:52:57.000 So, and that's not true of gays. 0.69

00:52:59.000 I'm sure it's true of most gays, probably 80%, but there's still the 20% who aren't getting represented.

00:53:05.000 And what they're really doing is using gays and homophobia and equality to push their political agenda. 0.72

00:53:15.000 It's pretty long, but he's pretty good.

00:53:18.000 See if you can imitate him. 0.72

00:53:22.000 It doesn't sound very gay in it.

00:53:24.000 I'm a journalist in New York City, and I'm outspoken.

00:53:27.000 Some people call it Big Gay, Gay Inc., the LGBT military industrial complex.

00:53:32.000 LGBT military industrial complex. 0.81

00:53:34.000 It's a network of hundreds of LGBT nonprofit organizations that take in and spend hundreds of millions of dollars.

00:53:41.000 Did you say he's gay?

00:53:42.000 No, I said that was good. 0.99

00:53:44.000 Yeah, I think he might be gay. 0.99

00:53:47.000 That's a teleports. 1.00

00:53:48.000 You probably heard pro-gay MAGA ads. 0.99

00:53:52.000 They're often gays. 0.94

00:53:54.000 Human rights campaign, Lambda legal. 0.93

00:53:56.000 He's not straight splendid right now.

00:53:57.000 I've never heard of most others.

00:53:59.000 One thing they have to do is... 0.92

00:54:00.000 That would be funny, though, if he wasn't gay, like if it was me. 0.97

00:54:04.000 Yeah. 0.97

00:54:04.000 Weird. 0.97

00:54:04.000 Well, I did that joke when I was talking about giving birth and how it's not that painful. 0.97

00:54:09.000 I always wanted to do that as a sketch, though.

00:54:11.000 It's talking about the birthing process, and it's four women who have given birth many times, talking about contractions and everything, and dilation and all that.

00:54:20.000 And then it's me who's read a lot about it.

00:54:22.000 And I would just be going, it's not that bad.

00:54:24.000 Once you get through the first hour and you breathe, it's really important to breathe, learn to breathe.

00:54:29.000 And they'd all just be sitting there staring over it.

00:54:32.000 And it's not that bad.

00:54:32.000 It's kind of like a needle pinch.

00:54:34.000 Yeah.

00:54:34.000 I did that once as a Rebel sketch.

00:54:36.000 And then there's all these people commenting going, yeah, it's not as bad as gallstones, kidney stones.

00:54:41.000 I'm like, I was kidding.

00:54:44.000 Wait, go to the end, though.

00:54:45.000 There's an interesting thing about human rights now or whatever.

00:54:51.000 Across the country, working class people, small business owners, and others who've gone through life without privilege saw themselves in Hillary's basket of deplorables.

00:55:01.000 Do you remember where Clinton was at that tuxedoed affair in which she felt comfortable insulting tens of millions of American voters, suggesting that they were somehow unworthy as the crowd laughed and cheered?

00:55:15.000 It was at a fundraiser for the human rights campaign.

00:55:17.000 That's it.

00:55:18.000 My name is Chabik Moore.

00:55:20.000 I'm a gay American, and I'm outspoken.

00:55:23.000 Cool.

00:55:24.000 What a great little button at the end, right?

00:55:26.000 Yeah.

00:55:28.000 He also talks about how much money they raise.

00:55:30.000 And I see that bumper sticker everywhere.

00:55:33.000 Human rights.

00:55:34.000 If you're concerned about human rights, you must be Googling Syria every 10 minutes.

00:55:39.000 All right.

00:55:41.000 Have we got Dinesh?

00:55:43.000 We don't have him yet, do we?

00:55:44.000 Okay.

00:55:44.000 I got to barf out a few more news items before that because we're going to do live tomorrow night.

00:55:50.000 And you know we never get anything done on the live shows.

00:55:52.000 And then we're going to live stream the election debate.

00:55:54.000 So let's just whip through these.

00:55:57.000 Kamala is childless.

00:55:59.000 I never thought about that.

00:56:00.000 She has stepkids, but she's not a mom. 0.99

00:56:03.000 She's never given birth, never trust a politician who doesn't have children.

00:56:06.000 They have no ties to the future, and they will form, and future they will form, and having none of their own, will have no concern for the consequences that it deals out to America's children.

00:56:16.000 Looking at you, Kamala.

00:56:17.000 And this is so true of Merkel.

00:56:20.000 She ruined Germany, let open the borders, said, come on in, I don't care what happens to my country because she's not a mom. 1.00

00:56:28.000 I gotta love shit for saying that I'm Fox. 1.00

00:56:30.000 You should be Christian and you should have a family, a real family, if you're running for president. 1.00

00:56:37.000 You could be divorced, but you should have a family with biological kids that are your own.

00:56:43.000 I mean, I'm not against someone who adopted a kid at a very young age.

00:56:46.000 You know what I'm saying.

00:56:49.000 And you'll notice Kamala Harris also comes from a broken family where her father ignored her.

00:56:54.000 Veritas, obviously, is on fire.

00:56:56.000 That's 2-4.

00:56:58.000 They caught Google doing what we all know.

00:57:00.000 I mean, it's almost a waste of time to show Veritas stuff on this show because it's just him providing evidence for things that we've been saying forever.

00:57:09.000 And it's like all negative.

00:57:10.000 And when you type in Joe Biden, it's all positive.

00:57:14.000 Because skewed by the voters or the drivers of the outbreak.

00:57:20.000 It's skewed by the 100 drivers of the outbreak.

00:57:23.000 I wonder if the white guy is like...

00:57:25.000 Are we being recorded right now?

00:57:28.000 Just eating?

00:57:34.000 It seems like they favor the Democrats.

00:57:40.000 Because we are in the middle of the company.

00:57:49.000 This guy, Ritesh Lakar, technical program manager at Google, is telling our journalists the truth about the company he has worked at for years.

00:57:56.000 With the presidential election just days away, he is calling out his own friends in big tech.

00:58:02.000 I disagree with situation playing and taking away freedom of speech on both sides.

00:58:09.000 So I'm like, you were playing selective government.

00:58:13.000 Like, if it was fraud, it doesn't matter.

00:58:15.000 But for Trump, Donald Trump believes.

00:58:18.000 And on the other side, Trump says something, misinformation, you are going to believe that because it's illegal under whatever pretext.

00:58:26.000 And if it ever was.

00:58:27.000 Okay, that's enough of that.

00:58:29.000 That brings us to Trump, we are really living in an age of misinformation. 1.00

00:58:34.000 It's pretty fucking nuts. 0.99

00:58:36.000 Like this Exxon quote. 0.99

00:58:38.000 So he's talking about corruption, right?

00:58:40.000 And he says, you know, if I was a corrupt president, if I was one of these corrupt politicians, I could say to say Exxon.

00:58:48.000 I could say, hey, if you donate $25 million to my campaign, we could make it easier for you to get this permit to do this and that.

00:58:54.000 They cut out the beginning. 0.94

00:58:56.000 And this journalist at Vox just puts the ending part, cuts out the if I were a shitty corrupt president part and just shows the end. 0.98

00:59:04.000 It is a disaster.

00:59:06.000 The New York Post, one of the oldest papers in America, maybe the world, Charlie Kirk, again, just like Chris Dialli, totally mainstream conservative, both have had their Twitter accounts locked three weeks before the election.

00:59:22.000 Or are we down to two weeks now?

00:59:24.000 I think it's two weeks.

00:59:26.000 And then we have this misinformation.

00:59:29.000 Go back to 3-2.

00:59:32.000 So then he goes, oh, I deleted this because the quote reads too much like something Trump actually said.

00:59:37.000 This is after it got 5 million views when he was talking about a hypothetical.

00:59:41.000 I thought the I'll use a company line nodded to that context, but it's apparent. 1.00

00:59:48.000 Bull fucking shit, Aaron Rupar, you stupid lying sack of shit. 1.00

00:59:54.000 I called the head of Exxon. 1.00

00:59:55.000 I'll use a company.

00:59:56.000 Hey, how?

00:59:57.000 How are you doing?

00:59:58.000 How's energy coming?

00:59:59.000 When you're doing the exploration, oh, you need a couple permits, huh?

01:00:01.000 But I call the head of Exxon.

01:00:02.000 I say, you know, it sounds like he already did that, actually.

01:00:06.000 It sounds like he's saying something that he does regularly.

01:00:09.000 This is disinformation.

01:00:11.000 And AOC promoted it.

01:00:12.000 Go to 3-4.

01:00:17.000 And what are they saying about the hot?

01:00:18.000 They're saying the Hunter Biden thing.

01:00:20.000 They're like, it's part of a Russian disinformation campaign.

01:00:22.000 And I saw Dinesh ask this.

01:00:25.000 He goes, okay, what exactly is the disinformation campaign?

01:00:30.000 Is it Hunter's laptop?

01:00:33.000 Are the emails fake?

01:00:35.000 They're not saying exactly what.

01:00:36.000 They just go, oh, it's disinformation.

01:00:37.000 It's not a thing.

01:00:39.000 No, we can see him say that he has to give half his money to his dad.

01:00:44.000 We see, and they cover this beautifully in Trump card.

01:00:48.000 We see his brother with no experience in construction, get a gig in Iraq to build skyrises to become the Donald Trump of Iraq overnight.

01:01:02.000 What's the disinformation?

01:01:03.000 Tell me, did that not happen? 0.99

01:01:06.000 I was going to ask Dinesh, do you feel bad that you made this and then all this other shit comes out? 0.97

01:01:11.000 Because that's why I stopped writing my book. 0.97

01:01:13.000 It was like writing about World War II in 1943.

01:01:16.000 Just like, but he manages to get all that in.

01:01:21.000 So all the laptop does now is vindicate him and show it's just more proof.

01:01:28.000 Let's show the, because he starts out the movie talking about Venezuela.

01:01:33.000 And go to 4-4.

01:01:37.000 This is typical.

01:01:39.000 Venezuela has tons of oil.

01:01:41.000 It should be one of the richest nations in the world.

01:01:43.000 And what do they got now?

01:01:44.000 They've got a barge that's about to sink and spill 55 million gallons of oil onto the shores of Trinidad and Tobago.

01:01:54.000 That picture is a perfect example.

01:01:56.000 That abandoned, sinking oil tanker is a perfect example of what socialism is.

01:02:03.000 Look at it.

01:02:04.000 The locals are like, we're watching an accident in slow motion.

01:02:11.000 And he uses Venezuela to start talking about the dangers of socialism.

01:02:16.000 Did you know Venezuela has their own Antifa who does their own violence?

01:02:22.000 And in Chile right now, their Antifa are burning down churches, like all the churches.

01:02:27.000 But see if you can dig up the Trump card trailer.

01:02:31.000 Have we played that yet? 1.00

01:02:32.000 Am I stupid? 0.98

01:02:33.000 A Tampa Bay pastor has been arrested for violating coronavirus social distancing rules. 1.00

01:02:40.000 We will shut you down.

01:02:42.000 We will arrest you.

01:02:43.000 And we will take you to...

01:02:45.000 Doesn't she look exactly like a porcupine? 1.00

01:02:48.000 Oh, wow.

01:02:49.000 That's kind of cute. 0.66

01:02:50.000 I hope she doesn't start rooting around my garbage. 1.00

01:02:53.000 Like, say she lost her watch. 0.88

01:02:56.000 She came over to my house and she accidentally maybe dropped like a gold, a fake tooth. 0.99

01:03:01.000 Maybe she has like dentures and she dropped them in the garbage by accident. 1.00

01:03:04.000 Oh, God, that's dangerous.

01:03:05.000 Yeah.

01:03:05.000 And then she's going through my garbage to find her dentures.

01:03:08.000 I might accidentally come out with a broom and start hitting her. 1.00

01:03:10.000 Sure.

01:03:10.000 Then she'd go, Gavin, what are you doing?

01:03:12.000 I go, oh, my God, I am so sorry.

01:03:15.000 I knew something was up when you were wearing clothes.

01:03:18.000 Yeah, that is weird.

01:03:19.000 And then she'd go, porcupines don't root in the garbage. 1.00

01:03:21.000 That's raccoons.

01:03:22.000 I go, you're right.

01:03:24.000 I am so sorry.

01:03:25.000 I can't believe I did this and I'm not covered in quills.

01:03:30.000 She goes, yeah, that's my choice.

01:03:31.000 I don't use my quills on my friends.

01:03:33.000 I certainly don't hit my friends with brooms.

01:03:36.000 They will skunk you. 1.00

01:03:38.000 Dale.

01:03:38.000 Period.

01:03:41.000 I'm not a porcupine.

01:03:42.000 Period.

01:03:45.000 Safety groups are turning to drones to monitor public spaces.

01:03:49.000 I'm starting to feel like I'm in a communist country.

01:04:00.000 There are certainly aspects of them that are true to a cause.

01:04:03.000 That is a good cause.

01:04:04.000 It says it right to me.

01:04:07.000 So they're very fine people?

01:04:08.000 Is that what you're saying?

01:04:10.000 I went to the big guys for the money. 0.99

01:04:11.000 I was ready to prostitute myself. 0.91

01:04:13.000 The Bidens have done very well, and Joe Biden's been very sophisticated and shrewd in the way he's done it. 0.98

01:04:19.000 He's essentially offshored the corruption.

01:04:22.000 Give it six hours.

01:04:23.000 If the prosecutor's not fired, you're not getting the money.

01:04:26.000 No, he fired the prosecutor for not investigating enough.

01:04:34.000 We have to say yes to socialism, to the word and everything.

01:04:37.000 We are living in many ways in a socialist society right now.

01:04:40.000 Only in America, when the president tweets about liberation, does he mean go back to work?

01:04:46.000 I think a lot of people should just say no.

01:04:48.000 People liked.

01:04:49.000 I remember when she said this.

01:04:50.000 I love work.

01:04:51.000 I know I have a fun job, but when I worked at a gas station, I liked going to work.

01:04:56.000 I liked being a bike messenger, even though it sucked.

01:05:02.000 The only statue not to be taken down.

01:05:05.000 My hands are being put in handcuffs.

01:05:07.000 My ankles are shacked. 0.92

01:05:10.000 My wife is a smokeshow. 1.00

01:05:12.000 Honestly, I think you should let me run the country.

01:05:17.000 He understands that what's at stake is the American dream.

01:05:22.000 In the movie, he has Trump calling him and pardoning him, but it's a reenactment.

01:05:26.000 Oh, I see.

01:05:32.000 Well, that was two minutes?

01:05:33.000 Yeah.

01:05:34.000 That felt like two seconds.

01:05:35.000 30 seconds.

01:05:36.000 It really goes by fast.

01:05:40.000 Okay.

01:05:41.000 I have a lot of questions for Dinesh.

01:05:43.000 So this is probably going to end up being a long ep.

01:05:46.000 Unless he hates this shirt and hangs up, and then we'll have a very short interview.

01:05:50.000 But yeah, let's please tell me you have.

01:05:53.000 Oh, yeah, we do.

01:05:58.000 Dinesh, are you there, sir?

01:06:01.000 I'm here.

01:06:01.000 It's good to be on the show.

01:06:03.000 It's great to have you back.

01:06:04.000 I hope you like this shirt we made. 0.73

01:06:06.000 It's you as a toad. 0.75

01:06:10.000 Oh, this rings a bell. 0.90

01:06:12.000 Yes, this is the philosophy of I can be whatever I want to be.

01:06:18.000 And if I decide I'm a toad and jump around and start croaking like a toad, then you've got to treat me like a toad and respect my rights as a toad and not do anything to offend me.

01:06:32.000 And if Disney's having a movie, I demand to have the toad role in the movie.

01:06:38.000 Well, we just love the way you say toad and it became a cult thing with the viewers.

01:06:42.000 So now we're all running around with these t-shirts.

01:06:44.000 We have a lot of t-shirts here.

01:06:45.000 We got a great Joe Biden one.

01:06:47.000 I pledge allegiance to the United States of America, one nation indivisible under God, for real.

01:06:53.000 For real.

01:06:54.000 For real.

01:06:55.000 You know, the thing.

01:06:58.000 Yeah, I think this is a guy.

01:07:00.000 You know, Trump gave up, I think, immense wealth and a lot of extravagance for his country.

01:07:08.000 And Biden has given up his country for a lot of wealth.

01:07:12.000 Perfect.

01:07:12.000 Well, I want to ask you that, actually.

01:07:16.000 It's worked out very well for him.

01:07:19.000 I was worried when I started this movie because all of this stuff is coming out now.

01:07:23.000 And I'm worried about you kicking yourself going, I didn't get the laptop in there.

01:07:27.000 But in the film, every allegation you make has now been corroborated by this laptop.

01:07:33.000 So it's actually perfect.

01:07:37.000 Absolutely.

01:07:38.000 This theme of Biden corruption, we made a decision early on in the movie Trump Card not to focus on the kind of mumbling, bumbling Joe Biden, but to focus on the corrupt Joe Biden.

01:07:50.000 Because while he may be mentally incompetent to a degree now, he's been highly competent at corruption for most of his career.

01:07:58.000 And even though people are talking about Hunter Biden, this really isn't about Hunter Biden.

01:08:02.000 The Biden family members are bag men, and they go along with Biden.

01:08:07.000 He makes the deals.

01:08:08.000 That's why, by the way, he demands half the salary.

01:08:11.000 His point is, I'm the one selling the access, not you.

01:08:14.000 You got to turn over half the cash to me.

01:08:18.000 So yes, the big guy, namely Joe Biden, is demanding his share of the loot.

01:08:22.000 And there it is in writing from Hunter Biden himself.

01:08:25.000 But one thing that confuses me is, and I've never understood this, how do you launder money?

01:08:30.000 I mean, a gift limit is $15,000 a year.

01:08:34.000 The state tax, which isn't really in play here, is only $11 million.

01:08:38.000 Hunter Biden, with that Chinese hedge fund, he must have been making $30 million.

01:08:41.000 How do you give that to your dad?

01:08:43.000 You just buy him a mansion and buy him a Lamborghini?

01:08:46.000 Well, let's remember in the emails where they were talking about an equity share, they talked about 10% for the big guy.

01:08:53.000 So the idea would be that Biden himself would have a direct stake in that company.

01:08:58.000 Now, in the other emails where Hunter is talking to family members, he's complaining that, hey, dad wants half my salary.

01:09:05.000 So I'm not really quite sure.

01:09:07.000 Obviously, it's quite easy to pass money within a family.

01:09:11.000 It's not that hard to do it.

01:09:13.000 And if you don't do it in cash, you can do it in kind.

01:09:16.000 But the bottom line is, here's a guy, Biden, who's been 47 years in public service.

01:09:21.000 He's got multiple homes, access to private planes, domestic staff.

01:09:25.000 I mean, how do you enjoy that kind of extravagance if you aren't taking something on the side?

01:09:29.000 Right.

01:09:30.000 And we see that with Nancy Pelosi and Maxine Waters, all these politicians making 200 grand a year worth 500 million.

01:09:36.000 They're really good at investing.

01:09:39.000 Yeah, Al Gore has gone from zero to a couple hundred million dollars through these various climate change projects.

01:09:45.000 The Obamas, through Netflix contracts.

01:09:48.000 The Clintons, of course, used the foundation.

01:09:50.000 I think what's clever about Joe Biden is he's realized that the Chinese have a long-standing policy in the Asia-Pacific region of enriching the family members of politicians that they want favors from. 0.95

01:10:03.000 Very cunning strategy.

01:10:04.000 And Biden just realized, wow, this is already in operation.

01:10:07.000 Let me just get in on it.

01:10:09.000 Now, don't you think, if I was to do that to my son, it'd be hard to resist.

01:10:13.000 What does he make with the Chinese thing?

01:10:15.000 $30 million a year?

01:10:17.000 The interest?

01:10:18.000 Yeah.

01:10:18.000 Or whatever you call it?

01:10:20.000 The Chinese deal, the investment opportunity through that equity fund in the Chinese market was $1.5 billion.

01:10:27.000 So this is a much bigger than the Ukraine deal, which was $83,000 a month to Hunter Biden and another $83,000 a month to his partner.

01:10:35.000 I mean, by the way, all of this is in Trump card.

01:10:37.000 We've got the sort of the sheaf of receipts right there.

01:10:42.000 And what's remarkable here to me is the media's refusal to cover this because, you know, I remember in my younger days, people would say to me, oh, Dinesh, the media, they're not ideologically biased.

01:10:52.000 You know, they're just sensationalists.

01:10:54.000 They just go after the story that gets the most.

01:10:57.000 Well, wait a minute.

01:10:58.000 What could be more sensational than the Democratic candidate for president, you know, ending up with a satchel full of money and renting out American foreign policy for profit? 0.90

01:11:07.000 And yet they won't touch it because they're on that team and they're trying to drag that crook, Biden, across the finish line. 0.75

01:11:14.000 But the thing I don't get about it is, why the hell would you run for president if you have that many skeletons in your closet? 0.68

01:11:20.000 If I did a scam like that, I would move to Boca Raton and hide with my fingers crossed that no one researches it or my son doesn't leave his laptop at a repair place.

01:11:30.000 Well, I think the reason is, I'm not even sure that this was sort of Biden's idea, but the Democrats seem to have decided. 0.76

01:11:37.000 Because initially, when Biden was the candidate, I thought to myself, wow, what a ridiculous individual to put up as the representative of a major party. 0.79

01:11:44.000 I mean, what sausage machine produced this bizarre outcome? 0.87

01:11:48.000 And then I realized that they actually chose him.

01:11:51.000 They pushed the other candidates out of the race to make room for Biden.

01:11:55.000 So I think for Biden, this was just a case where you have sort of a Michael Corleone figure, and he was kind of hoping to get out of the racket and enjoy a peaceful senility when they come.

01:12:07.000 Suddenly he realizes, I can be the president of the United States.

01:12:11.000 You know, I basically can have the world at my beck and call. 1.00

01:12:14.000 So just a combination of stupidity and greed is driving, I think, this bizarre character forward. 0.99

01:12:20.000 And maybe after half a century, he just feels like a monarch and he's entitled to the throne. 1.00

01:12:24.000 He's the king.

01:12:26.000 Well, this is the thing on the left.

01:12:28.000 All these people feel a sense of immunity. 0.97

01:12:30.000 I mean, they can be perverts and pedophiles. 0.93

01:12:33.000 They can be beating off on a Zoom call. 0.99

01:12:36.000 You know, these are the very people who accuse Donald Trump of inappropriate behavior.

01:12:41.000 Look at the tone of his tweets.

01:12:43.000 You know, and then they're sexting minors. 1.00

01:12:46.000 You know, they're sex predators and going to Lolita Island. 1.00

01:12:49.000 And this is the left. 0.99

01:12:51.000 But they have this sense of entitlement.

01:12:53.000 No one's going to call them on it.

01:12:54.000 This is sort of the perks that they get for being on their side.

01:12:58.000 Yeah.

01:12:58.000 And they're always accusing people of the things they're doing.

01:13:02.000 I have sort of a melange of questions here.

01:13:05.000 So it won't be as consistent as this first half of the interview.

01:13:09.000 But that true the vote thing where they get attacked by, she calls it an alphabet soup of agencies.

01:13:16.000 And it reminded me of what you went through, what Roger Stone went through, what George Papadopoulos went through.

01:13:20.000 And it's the deep state controlling the judicial system. 0.99

01:13:24.000 This is why Proud Boys are in prison for four years.

01:13:27.000 But then I realized it's also going over to the Ukraine where he cancels that prosecutor.

01:13:33.000 So now they're controlling the global judicial system.

01:13:37.000 That's a new one.

01:13:39.000 The left is a global racket.

01:13:41.000 And the right is not like that because you might find some affinities for American conservatism, let's say maybe in the Tory Party in Great Britain.

01:13:50.000 But the right in America has no affinity with the right, say, in France or in Eastern Europe.

01:13:56.000 But the left is like that.

01:13:57.000 I mean, just recently they burned two churches in Chile.

01:14:01.000 I just saw that.

01:14:03.000 Yeah, a guy coming out in a black Antifa-style outfit.

01:14:06.000 He looks like he could have been a graduate of, you know, Oberlin College or Swarthmore.

01:14:10.000 And he knocks the statue over and they set the church on fire.

01:14:13.000 Wow, that's deja vu.

01:14:14.000 It reminds me of setting St. John's church on fire, pulling down the statues of the Christians who built the missions in Venezuela.

01:14:22.000 Debbie, my wife, tells me the first thing they did when Hugo Chavez came to power, knocked down Columbus statues.

01:14:28.000 Why?

01:14:28.000 Columbus is a symbol of Western imperialism, same as here.

01:14:32.000 So this is the way in which you have an international left.

01:14:35.000 And that allows, by the way, characters like George Soros to invest in the left as an international movement.

01:14:42.000 Right, a global movement.

01:14:44.000 Well, that was one of the most fascinating things about the film, because I never heard of the collectivas before, but you show Venezuela has their own Antifa doing the same things.

01:14:53.000 I always said Antifa is the paramilitary wing of the DNC, but they're not.

01:14:57.000 They're the paramilitary wing of the entire global left.

01:15:02.000 Exactly right.

01:15:03.000 You know, if we go back to Mussolini in the 20s or early Hitler in the 30s, they saw a paramilitary as necessary while they get to power. 0.51

01:15:15.000 Once Hitler got to power, he pretty much disbanded the brown shirts because he realized, I don't need the brown shirts, I've got the police, I've got the German army. 0.95

01:15:23.000 So once the power transfers to the state, you don't need street gangs anymore.

01:15:28.000 Now, Hugo Chavez in Venezuela uses the collectivos as a kind of roving band of brigands or outlaws to subdue the population.

01:15:38.000 By the way, he was very clever to take away guns before this.

01:15:41.000 So once people are disarmed, then you can unleash the power of the state against them.

01:15:46.000 And you see the Venezuelan model being really the direction in which the American left is pushing.

01:15:51.000 They keep saying, Scandinavia, Scandinavia, but they don't demonize the rich in Scandinavia.

01:15:57.000 They don't pull down Columbus statues in Scandinavia.

01:16:00.000 None of that.

01:16:01.000 So the Scandinavian model is invoked, but it's not one that the left is actually pursuing.

01:16:06.000 You know, I liked how you got kind of spiritual at the end, and we were talking about what's more godlike and freedom.

01:16:14.000 And I've always said that when communists are in power, they play God.

01:16:19.000 Stalin will decide who feeds you. 0.73

01:16:20.000 I'll decide how much food you get.

01:16:22.000 And what happens when they do that?

01:16:24.000 Millions of people die.

01:16:25.000 In a free country, you say, I'm going to let the free market, which is kind of nature, which is kind of God.

01:16:31.000 So I think America's closer to God than socialist countries.

01:16:36.000 And the way we're getting to socialism, it can't be a coincidence we're also getting away from God at the same time.

01:16:43.000 Yeah, let me put this a slightly different way.

01:16:46.000 The left says that they want democratic socialism and that popular consent is what renders this socialism acceptable.

01:16:55.000 The people themselves want it.

01:16:57.000 But let's think about this.

01:16:58.000 People exercise their popular consent in the political process very rarely.

01:17:03.000 Once every two years, once every four years, that's it.

01:17:07.000 But in the market, you exercise your consent all the time, many times a day.

01:17:12.000 And while only certain people are eligible to vote, in the market, everybody votes.

01:17:16.000 Even illegal aliens vote. 0.61

01:17:18.000 By and large, you vote with your hard-earned dollars.

01:17:21.000 And so it costs you something to vote.

01:17:23.000 Whereas it doesn't cost you anything to vote in the political process.

01:17:26.000 You just go out and vote if you're doing nothing and it's not raining.

01:17:29.000 But in the market, it costs you your hard-earned labor.

01:17:32.000 So the market is far more responsive to popular consent than the political process.

01:17:39.000 Yeah, and I also feel like it's more natural.

01:17:41.000 It's more godlike when you accept meritocracy and don't try to change things and don't try to make everyone in the NBA short because you want to help short people.

01:17:51.000 Well, what's going on in the NBA with these guys like LeBron James, I think it's actually something very cunning and sly.

01:17:57.000 LeBron James doesn't want to have to explain To some white truck driver, why that guy makes $70,000 and LeBron makes $70 million.

01:18:06.000 In other words, LeBron makes 1,000 times that guy for bouncing a ball.

01:18:10.000 And let's remember that LeBron's privilege is entirely genetic.

01:18:13.000 You can't say, well, LeBron works really hard.

01:18:15.000 Well, I work really hard, but I can't play in the NBA.

01:18:18.000 I'm not 6'9.

01:18:19.000 So obviously, there's a genetic advantage.

01:18:22.000 But so what does LeBron do?

01:18:23.000 He says, okay, listen, how about if I take the class lens out of the camera and replace it with the race lens?

01:18:30.000 Then I can go up to some white guy and badger him and go, wait a minute, you're a beneficiary of white privilege because a cop is far more likely to stop me than to stop you. 0.95

01:18:38.000 Now, that's, of course, complete nonsense. 0.89

01:18:40.000 If any cop stops LeBron, it's probably to get his autograph.

01:18:44.000 But nevertheless, by putting the race card in there, LeBron James gets not only to enjoy the perquisites of enormous wealth, but also the privilege of playing the victim.

01:18:54.000 It's an Orwellian world where up is down and down is up, and LeBron James is a victim of prejudice and bigotry, and he didn't benefit from meritocracy.

01:19:05.000 What are your predictions for the election?

01:19:09.000 All my instincts tell me that Trump is going to win and win decisively.

01:19:14.000 This is supported by the fact that Biden has difficulty getting two dozen people to show up, and even they, half of them, are falling asleep while he speaks.

01:19:22.000 I don't think he really has a single fan in the country, not even in the Democratic Party.

01:19:29.000 So the polls mystify me a little bit.

01:19:32.000 My sense is they're being massaged by the pollsters who want to create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

01:19:37.000 I don't trust these guys any more than I trust the media.

01:19:40.000 I mean, we're beginning to see with the media, we don't have a real media in this country, right?

01:19:44.000 When you think of the media or the press, the founders had in mind an independent group of people who are outside the government, captive to neither side, applying a critical scrutiny to government, showing the American people information so that they could adjudicate and make up their own mind.

01:19:59.000 You only have to spell this out to realize we don't have a media.

01:20:02.000 What we have are basically paid lobbyists who are working for the political left.

01:20:06.000 They will do their best to cover up the crimes of the left, and they do their best to magnify the offenses of the other side.

01:20:14.000 Uh-oh, hold on, Denesse, you're frozen there for a second.

01:20:17.000 I think our car.

01:20:18.000 Yeah, I saw that.

01:20:18.000 It was a momentary freeze.

01:20:20.000 So this is a shameless media, transparently one-sided, and not fulfilling the critical role of a real free press.

01:20:31.000 Yeah, and it's incredible now with this Biden thing talking about disinformation, taking a Trump quote about Exxon, where he said a corrupt politician would do that, and just showing the part of his example that was meant to illuminate corruption and pretending he was saying it.

01:20:50.000 AOCs retweeting it, calling it illegal.

01:20:52.000 They really are working on behalf of the left to provide disinformation for us.

01:20:58.000 It's almost Soviet. 0.82

01:21:00.000 Even you, look how hard you have to work to get your stuff out there that is obviously incredibly popular.

01:21:04.000 You've got to build your own pirate ship to get it to the people. 0.66

01:21:08.000 And the people want it.

01:21:09.000 The demand is there.

01:21:11.000 Yes, and then when you factor in the digital platforms that are blocking you, I mean, right now, our movie Trump card, you can get it on Google, you can get it on iTunes, you can get it on YouTube, you can get it on Xfinity, Fandango.

01:21:25.000 But what about Amazon Prime?

01:21:27.000 We can't get it on Amazon Prime.

01:21:29.000 They keep saying, we'll put it up, we'll put it up, but there's a backlog.

01:21:32.000 And then our DVDs, we have tens of thousands of orders at Amazon, but there's delayed shipping.

01:21:37.000 And some people are getting notifications.

01:21:39.000 You'll get the movie the day after the election.

01:21:41.000 Oh, what a coincidence.

01:21:43.000 I don't know what's going on.

01:21:44.000 I'm not accusing Amazon of anything, but I think it's really interesting that in the last two weeks leading up to an election, our movie is being blocked from Amazon Prime, and our orders are under delayed shipment.

01:21:55.000 Well, there's still meritocracy in the country, Dinesh.

01:21:58.000 And when you make an excellent product like TrumpCard, it is inevitable that people will see it no matter who tries to stop it.

01:22:03.000 Quality beats oppression in this case.

01:22:07.000 Well, this is true.

01:22:08.000 I mean, we're basically, we've been number one or number two on iTunes.

01:22:11.000 We're number one on Fandango.

01:22:13.000 Basically, people are flocking to the movie.

01:22:15.000 It's a really good movie.

01:22:16.000 I mean, I think my best one.

01:22:18.000 And it takes on a big topic, socialism.

01:22:21.000 How did this preposterous, discredited ideology, which collapsed all over the world in the last century, make an amazing comeback in the 21st century?

01:22:30.000 So we tell that story.

01:22:31.000 It's a narrative that is scary in times, and I would say even a horror movie, but it's also moving and inspirational and motivational at the end.

01:22:41.000 Excellent job.

01:22:42.000 Thanks very much for coming on the show and we'll tell our fans to go see it.

01:22:45.000 It's a great movie.

01:22:47.000 I appreciate it.

01:22:48.000 Hey, thanks.

01:22:48.000 Bye-bye.

01:22:49.000 Bye, Dinesh.

01:22:50.000 Thanks, buddy.

01:22:58.000 What do you think of that song, Trump? 0.87

01:23:00.000 I just want them to suffer.

01:23:02.000 Oh, he doesn't like the song.

01:23:04.000 ACDC or the people that made it?

01:23:05.000 People that made that song, he doesn't like.

01:23:08.000 He wants them to suffer.

01:23:09.000 What happened?

01:23:13.000 Yeah, one thing I didn't mention to Dinesh that I always love mentioning every time he comes up is that he's the reason Michelle Malkin is who she is.

01:23:21.000 She was a mousy little conservative. 0.90

01:23:23.000 And she saw at her school when she was like 20 all her professors saying, D'Souza, D'Souza, don't let the white man use you.

01:23:32.000 And she went, wait, professors are getting involved in the politics of students and protesting a talk at my school?

01:23:41.000 So the professors are trying to prevent me from hearing information.

01:23:44.000 And I'm going into debt at this school?

01:23:47.000 And then she just went, beast mode. 0.76

01:23:50.000 War.

01:23:58.000 So yeah, it's a pretty good movie.

01:23:59.000 And it's just like, another good thing about it is when he gets into Biden and the facts, like it just lays it out.

01:24:06.000 And Dinesh is the master of just explaining it in really simple and easy to understand terms.

01:24:13.000 His brother was a failure in real estate.

01:24:15.000 He set his brother up in Iraq.

01:24:18.000 Next thing you know, his brother is a building tycoon in Iraq, building skyrises. 0.56

01:24:24.000 I just, I still want to know about the money.

01:24:26.000 I've always been fascinated by money laundering.

01:24:28.000 I mean, I never Wanted to pay tax ever, but I didn't want to go to jail.

01:24:32.000 And I've been talking to accountants my whole life since Vice.

01:24:35.000 And how do we get, how do we not do this?

01:24:37.000 How do we not pay tax?

01:24:38.000 And they never have a scam.

01:24:41.000 I'm like, what if I got cash and then I bought a big TV with it?

01:24:45.000 And they go, the IRS, during audits, they come to your house, they add up your furniture, they see your car.

01:24:51.000 That seems futile.

01:24:52.000 Like, I don't even get how drug dealers, they buy their mom a Range Rover.

01:24:56.000 The IRS is going to wonder why your mom has a Range Rover. 0.91

01:25:01.000 Now, they say there's other ways where you spend 10 years buying real estate and then your kids own it and then they slowly take a piece a year.

01:25:10.000 But even then, the estate tax is $11 million.

01:25:14.000 So how do you leave your kids $12 million?

01:25:18.000 You know, the one mystery, remember that the child trafficking stuff?

01:25:22.000 You're like, so what does that mean that they rescued all these kids?

01:25:25.000 I watched one of the latest Rogans, and then the guests said that, you know, most of them come from Mexico or Asia.

01:25:31.000 Asia is huge.

01:25:32.000 So they are smuggled into the country probably from Mexico, but from Asia and stuff like that.

01:25:40.000 And then only one out of four kids out of that, like 30, those batches are like child trafficking.

01:25:46.000 And the other ones are missing or they run away or they're troubled.

01:25:49.000 So they take Asians, bring them to Mexico, and then push them over the border. 1.00

01:25:53.000 Well, you know, that's weird because the news is hard, especially for a relay.

01:26:00.000 Fly here, too, because a way to catch them is that you just monitor behavior.

01:26:05.000 Like a flight attendant noticed a distressed child was just there by herself, like a young, maybe 12 or something like that, like flying on her own.

01:26:13.000 And then by the time they landed, there were agents there to save her.

01:26:16.000 No, but and I should be clear here.

01:26:19.000 It's not like I didn't hear Dinesh say he would get shares in the company and Joe Biden would be a shareholder.

01:26:26.000 But that's still, that's still a paper trail.

01:26:30.000 So my point is, I understand what Joe did, but it looks like he's caught with a paper trail.

01:26:35.000 I've never understood how gangsters launder money in drug dealers.

01:26:38.000 I don't get it.

01:26:39.000 How do you clean the money?

01:26:40.000 I actually talked, interviewed some Puerto Rican heroin dealers back in Vice days, and they said they had a money room.

01:26:48.000 They're technically PhDs, Puerto Rican heroin dealers. 0.98

01:26:52.000 Yeah, good one. 0.98

01:26:53.000 But it was a room like, you know, your bedroom in the fag zone? 1.00

01:26:57.000 Yes, there's no fag zone, but I know my bedroom. 0.92

01:26:59.000 Not quite that big.

01:27:00.000 But imagine that, literally floor to ceiling, money, wall to wall.

01:27:03.000 Oh my.

01:27:03.000 Like you'd open it, and it would just be hard.

01:27:06.000 And the problem with Puerto Ricans in the Lower East Side is that's where they come from. 1.00

01:27:10.000 So you get a Jesus piece, that's 40 grand, Jesus' head with gold and diamonds on it.

01:27:15.000 And then you might get a car. 0.99

01:27:16.000 It's a huge pain in the ass having a car in the Lower East Side. 0.97

01:27:19.000 You got to move it twice a week. 0.98

01:27:20.000 If the tickets pile up, it's going to get the boot. 0.99

01:27:22.000 So you're constantly moving that stupid car, or maybe you pay for a parking space. 0.99

01:27:26.000 But Puerto Ricans are very, or at least Lower East Side Puerto Ricans are very parochial. 1.00

01:27:32.000 They have their block, and that's where they hang out and they drink on the stoop.

01:27:36.000 They're not like going to Puerto Vallarta and Monaco and renting a yacht.

01:27:40.000 It's not their culture.

01:27:41.000 They don't want to.

01:27:42.000 They don't go out to $700 dinners at Lucerque.

01:27:46.000 They like to have plantains? 0.80

01:27:49.000 What do you people eat?

01:27:50.000 Yeah, or just go to Red Lobster and order a bunch of stuff there.

01:27:53.000 Yeah.

01:27:54.000 Yeah.

01:27:55.000 Because we don't know anything else.

01:27:57.000 We don't know.

01:27:58.000 So I guess the only thing they know is they go to strip club, and at least there they can blow 50 grand a night.

01:28:04.000 You know how they find out about high-end stuff?

01:28:06.000 Rap songs.

01:28:07.000 They're like, we're going to, you know, Japanese restaurant.

01:28:10.000 We're going to gasho or whatever they rap about.

01:28:13.000 And they're like, oh, let's go there.

01:28:15.000 Yeah, I was going to mention that on today's show.

01:28:17.000 Maybe I'll talk about it tomorrow.

01:28:18.000 But Tucker had a bunch of rappers who were talking about, you sell cocaine, I just filed a false claim.

01:28:24.000 And then they got arrested for filing a false claim.

01:28:28.000 We'll cover that.

01:28:29.000 All right, let's hit the mail beat. 1.00

01:28:31.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad. 0.99

01:28:36.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mail back. 1.00

01:28:41.000 Let me touch it.

01:28:44.000 Hey, Gavin, Mr. Pooftor.

01:28:45.000 Growing up in Canada and now living in the land of the free.

01:28:47.000 I've noticed no one buys beers for each other up here.

01:28:51.000 In Canada, after three pints...

01:28:53.000 Wait, growing up in Canada now?

01:28:54.000 Oh, yeah.

01:28:56.000 Here is a pint.

01:28:57.000 Want some Coke?

01:28:58.000 We can share a woman.

01:28:59.000 We shovel each other's driveway.

01:29:00.000 We make fun of each other constantly.

01:29:01.000 Living in Arizona, the only time someone buys a beer for me, I know instantly they're snowbirds and get bullshitting about life. 0.98

01:29:06.000 Americans are terrible at this. 1.00

01:29:08.000 It's like they're afraid you'll bring up politics or religion.

01:29:11.000 I can't wrap my head around it.

01:29:12.000 Why are Canadians more nosy? 0.99

01:29:16.000 I'm of Scottish descent and there are zero secrets in my family.

01:29:18.000 I think Americans are afraid of being nice because it makes you look weak.

01:29:21.000 Let me know what you think.

01:29:22.000 I had a guy explain this to me.

01:29:25.000 And he was a fellow Canadian.

01:29:27.000 And his theory was, because there's so much racial tension in America, and it's not a monoculture, and there's so many separated cultures, like Hispanic, Mexican culture, black culture, that you don't trust anyone.

01:29:42.000 So when someone buys you a beer, it's just like in prison.

01:29:44.000 You just grab the beer.

01:29:47.000 So you don't feel a camaraderie.

01:29:48.000 You're wary of other people, more wary in America, maybe because of the high crime rate.

01:29:55.000 Then in Canada, you're all like everyone's dog for bone.

01:29:58.000 And I have noticed that in Britain and in Canada, you buy beers.

01:30:05.000 When I first moved to New York, I was buying rounds and I noticed no one is buying rounds.

01:30:08.000 And I'm like, I just spent $80.

01:30:11.000 So now I never do it.

01:30:13.000 Although I will say, out in the burbs, you'll get a beer and then you'll get one for Tom over there.

01:30:20.000 And they'll get one for Tom.

01:30:22.000 And so it seems to be coming back in my old age.

01:30:24.000 But yeah, definitely in my younger days when I first moved to New York when I was 29, there was none of that going on.

01:30:30.000 Never happened in the States.

01:30:33.000 Have you heard of the Critical Drinker?

01:30:35.000 He's a prolific writer, YouTuber, erudite pop critic named Jack Taylor who decries, blah, blah, blah, he's Scottish.

01:30:40.000 He does his reviews half-plastered on Jack-Makers, yet it's obvious he's forgotten more about storytelling than any of those massive turds will ever know.

01:30:50.000 He wrote a scathing review on the feminine role model and white dude hater that is Brie Larson Captain Marvel.

01:30:56.000 This guy looks familiar.

01:31:01.000 Wait, find the Brie Larson one.

01:31:04.000 Why would you go to Mulan?

01:31:07.000 It's in the email, Ryan.

01:31:09.000 Oh.

01:31:10.000 And he closes with his signature catchphrase: this is the newest one. 0.97

01:31:16.000 What the hell?

01:31:17.000 Great news, everyone.

01:31:18.000 It's come to my attention that celebrity activist and theorist Brie Larson has launched her own YouTube channel, permitting us a fascinating insight into the mind, life, and personality.

01:31:31.000 Sounds popular and relatable actors in Hollywood.

01:31:35.000 Now let's take a quick look and see what we can expect.

01:31:39.000 Hi, I'm Brie Larson.

01:31:41.000 Oh, God.

01:31:42.000 A solid start.

01:31:43.000 Keep it up.

01:31:44.000 I'm starting to channel.

01:31:46.000 He seems cool.

01:31:49.000 But I can't do the funny accent thing.

01:31:54.000 So real Scottish fake drunk.

01:31:57.000 Enough with the doubt about whether it's a good show or not, Gav.

01:31:59.000 You're coming across as a real beta.

01:32:01.000 Yeah, a lot of people said that. 0.84

01:32:03.000 Dear G-Dog, I'm writing out my opinion that Homo Incest Crap Festival, a movie show, is the worst there will ever be.

01:32:09.000 I know, but we did have that writer who wrote in and said, it's supposed to be the worst thing in the world.

01:32:15.000 They did a good job. 1.00

01:32:16.000 Like he was fucking with everyone and he's trying to make a piece of insane crap. 0.98

01:32:20.000 I know you said you're not into QAnon, but have you heard of X22 report and Edge of Wonder who have been purged off YouTube recently? 0.99

01:32:27.000 Wait, have we already talked about these guys?

01:32:31.000 Edge of Wonder?

01:32:33.000 There's a lot of people getting purged.

01:32:35.000 They are coming down hard in these weeks up to the election, aren't they? 0.99

01:32:44.000 The lawsuits, the doxing, the fucking exposes. 0.98

01:32:52.000 The banning. 0.99

01:32:52.000 Polly, that chick Polly's gone? 0.99

01:32:56.000 The Amazing Polly. 0.57

01:32:57.000 The Amazing Polly? 0.98

01:32:59.000 Okay, we'll check that out on our own time.

01:33:01.000 And because we're running out of time, we'll do one more.

01:33:06.000 Wait, we'll do two more. 0.62

01:33:07.000 Super Fag Lord and Super Fag Lord Ultra here just two weeks before the election, a massive international corruption scandal leaks about the Biden family implicating Joe himself and his campaign.

01:33:14.000 Puts out a cat video?

01:33:16.000 Are they just trolling us now?

01:33:18.000 Or do they have nothing to say? 1.00

01:33:20.000 And they are so fucked, they just put out anything. 1.00

01:33:23.000 And that was the bullshit pick by the ads manager, Karen. 1.00

01:33:28.000 There's still a lot of people who will like Joe just because they are blue, no matter. 0.99

01:33:32.000 So I could see him trolling us like, yeah, so what?

01:33:35.000 Well, if he acknowledges the allegations, it's like touching tar.

01:33:40.000 He can't.

01:33:42.000 You don't want anyone to Google this.

01:33:44.000 So if I was Biden, I might do the same thing.

01:33:47.000 All right, last one from Joe.

01:33:51.000 This is an interview with Brett Gerowitz from Bad Religion.

01:33:53.000 I don't know if you've seen this yet.

01:33:54.000 He outright says, whites shouldn't express their opinion.

01:33:57.000 How punk rock is that? 0.98

01:33:59.000 I always hated bad religion. 1.00

01:34:01.000 I hated that sound.

01:34:01.000 That's why I gave up punk, was that whole sort of SoCal scene.

01:34:05.000 But I hated how he thought it was brave to have a Christian cross crossed out as your thing.

01:34:09.000 Let's see you do that with the sickle or the star of David. 0.95

01:34:12.000 You hate religion, right? 0.99

01:34:14.000 So you must hate Judaism and Islam. 0.99

01:34:16.000 Oh no, that's too risky. 1.00

01:34:18.000 You just do the Christian shit. 1.00

01:34:24.000 All right, let's go to the last video. 1.00

01:34:26.000 Boom, boom, bam, boom.

01:34:31.000 This is it.

01:34:31.000 That's a nice clean one.

01:34:32.000 4-7. 0.99

01:34:36.000 How fucking intense is this? 0.99

01:34:39.000 You know, while we're all stuck in the weeds of politics and lies and corruption, there's some real men out there doing the bravest shit imaginable next to fighting for your country. 0.99

01:34:50.000 Like, how scary must this be? 0.99

01:34:53.000 Holy crap, Pola. 1.00

01:34:56.000 Is that like 40 stories tall? 0.99

01:34:59.000 It looks like a skyscraper.

01:35:00.000 You'll notice no one else is there in the water.

01:35:04.000 Just people in parkas watching him.

01:35:06.000 That's pretty funny.

01:35:07.000 Where on the planet are waves that big?

01:35:09.000 My place.

01:35:10.000 Australia?

01:35:13.000 In the movie Point Break, he meets him in Australia at the end.

01:35:18.000 Wow. 0.74

01:35:22.000 Some people still got balls, folks. 0.99

01:35:24.000 Get fired. 0.98

01:35:25.000 Get in trouble.

01:35:26.000 Be brave.

01:35:26.000 And never stop fighting.

01:35:32.000 Don't you mess around.

01:35:39.000 I'm dying of mic.

01:35:43.000 And I win the fight.

01:35:46.000 I'm a power.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - October 20, 2020

S03E27 - TRUMP CARD [2020-10-20 - S03E27 - TRUMP CARD]

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