Impaulsive with Logan Paul - A MESSAGE TO JAKE AND TANA - IMPAULSIVE EP. 93

00:00:00.340 Lisa, tell them about our new show.

00:00:03.000 We have a new podcast.

00:00:04.320 It's called Don't Lie to Me.

00:00:05.760 I'm Lexi Iwanu.

00:00:06.860 We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart.

00:00:11.040 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one,

00:00:13.200 which means we have wildly different references,

00:00:15.440 occasionally different opinions.

00:00:16.760 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

00:00:19.600 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes,

00:00:22.560 Good Taste is my business.

00:00:24.740 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

00:00:27.620 or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:00:30.000 Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman, Angela Jaritana, Jeremy Colhane, Patrick McDonald, and we're

00:00:36.120 the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists podcast, the Improvised Character

00:00:40.540 Comedy podcast, where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

00:00:45.420 Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

00:00:48.500 And we do a little Halloween sometimes.

00:00:50.720 Does the Pope dress up?

00:00:52.060 He winks on Halloween.

00:00:54.320 He gets right up next to the microphone.

00:00:56.020 I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other.

00:00:58.980 You've never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween.

00:01:04.480 Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:01:11.980 I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast,

00:01:17.640 the true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it.

00:01:22.020 Each week I bring on an amazing guest.

00:01:23.900 Ooh, I scammed them.

00:01:25.080 What?

00:01:25.560 I could talk to you for an hour.

00:01:26.940 You're a generational yapper, like me.

00:01:28.980 That's why I had to make yapping a job.

00:01:31.100 And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube.

00:01:34.360 Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:01:40.300 Scam Goddess!

00:01:42.140 I'm Hamza.

00:01:42.820 And I'm Martin.

00:01:43.400 And we're the hosts of Out of Character, the best podcast in the world.

00:01:46.680 It's really funny and a good time.

00:01:48.240 Wait, really?

00:01:48.700 Yeah, yeah.

00:01:49.340 I think statistics just came back and we're one of the funniest two guys with mics.

00:01:53.480 And that's pretty hard to beat right now, but it's true, actually. 0.99

00:01:56.800 Why should people listen to us?

00:01:58.160 Tell them.

00:01:58.500 Well, we're trendy, we're funny, we're topical.

00:02:00.880 You get all your news here.

00:02:02.020 Not, you know, the facts, but maybe our takes on it

00:02:04.800 and everything in between.

00:02:06.320 So listen out of character on the iHeartRadio app,

00:02:09.260 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:02:12.380 You know what is crazier?

00:02:13.480 Yeah, pull me out of this rabbit hole, man.

00:02:14.800 My brother is engaged.

00:02:16.440 Is he, though?

00:02:17.860 Jake, are you?

00:02:18.900 No, it's for the cloud, dog.

00:02:19.940 Is it, dude?

00:02:21.220 actually you have been busting out some good fashion lately it's fashion bro but it's wrinkly 0.79

00:02:31.820 your clothes have been tighter like my balls welcome back to impulsive the number one podcast

00:02:38.820 in the world that's not a joke we love you guys thank you for listening watching viewing 0.92

00:02:42.620 subscribing hit that subscribe button if you're not subscribed mike you're back from miami good

00:02:46.600 Yeah, and I see nothing has gotten better here because I land on the podcast desk.

00:02:51.680 I literally landed on it, and there's no waters, no coffees.

00:02:55.500 Oh, yeah.

00:02:56.080 Like, our production team's not even here.

00:02:59.020 It's our assistant Danny is running everything.

00:03:01.260 I literally left for, I think, three days.

00:03:03.620 We're falling apart, man. 1.00

00:03:04.400 And the whole thing has gone to shit. 1.00

00:03:05.380 Do you know why? 0.99

00:03:05.960 Colin, who is kind of the head and set up this whole entire podcast,

00:03:10.060 I didn't accept the first possible sponsorship we had.

00:03:13.100 I denied it.

00:03:14.060 He's so mad.

00:03:14.500 I bet he's pissed.

00:03:15.360 He's so mad.

00:03:15.820 I bet he's salty.

00:03:16.600 Sorry, Colin, I got to get behind these brands.

00:03:19.100 I got to truthfully want to do them, so apologies.

00:03:22.100 Hey, we did miss you when you were gone, man.

00:03:24.380 I sent you a text.

00:03:25.740 Someone commented this in the last podcast, and I kind of felt this.

00:03:28.800 I think Spencer did, too.

00:03:29.920 They commented, if this podcast was a chip, Mike would be the dip.

00:03:34.320 I need my chips with the dip.

00:03:35.600 You can't really have one without the other.

00:03:37.180 I mean, I can relate to it.

00:03:38.240 You can, it's just whack.

00:03:39.280 It was kind of, like, I watched some of your guys.

00:03:43.940 As soon as I noticed that I wasn't on, I turned it off.

00:03:45.860 but like some of it i did watch and how long did it take you to notice that you weren't on it

00:03:50.620 you know it's weird because i thought i would have noticed it because i wasn't on yeah it took

00:03:55.200 you to watch it i don't know yeah but uh it was funny dude you guys it was good it was still good 0.54

00:04:01.220 it was still good and by the way michael j white fucking legend yeah and so he he kind of carried

00:04:06.280 it not gonna lie it's almost like everything and i aim to do this with my words someday 0.82

00:04:11.480 everything he says is a nugget of wisdom literally everything yeah this will definitely be a birthday

00:04:19.260 to remember tanner reveals the proposal news on oh what is going on here we blew our load a little 0.56

00:04:24.940 early what else is new we'll get to it my brother got engaged that's fucking weird but yeah man how 0.59

00:04:28.860 was miami ratchet did you come back with anything just like uh like not just stds yeah i haven't 0.71

00:04:36.440 been tested yet so i have no idea but uh i'll i'll say this miami is we've talked about it in the

00:04:41.640 past the most destructive oh thank you so much chef katie i love having a five-star chef in the

00:04:47.200 house hey could i could i maybe get one of those yeah thank you like iced coffee with the mushroom

00:04:52.620 coffee on it with a paper straw of course because save the environment i'm all right thank you chef 0.98

00:04:57.100 katie had my orange juice feeling good this is so love you fucking terrible dude is it really 0.99

00:05:02.420 She's whack, dude. 0.99

00:05:03.380 Chocolate milk takes 1.00

00:05:04.060 with dog shit. 1.00

00:05:05.700 We love you, Chef Katie. 1.00

00:05:06.900 Miami,

00:05:07.560 most destructive 0.99

00:05:08.820 and degenerative place

00:05:10.940 on this planet.

00:05:12.680 Hank.

00:05:14.700 Wow, you just hit that?

00:05:16.180 It was the right time.

00:05:17.040 That was amazing.

00:05:18.220 Maybe you should.

00:05:18.860 Wait, why doesn't he run

00:05:20.100 the soundboard?

00:05:20.460 Should we give Dylan the soundboard?

00:05:21.820 I don't hear, but I'm down.

00:05:23.160 Run the soundboard.

00:05:23.940 Dylan, our producer,

00:05:24.960 should definitely run the soundboard.

00:05:26.140 It is.

00:05:26.640 It takes years off of my life.

00:05:28.140 Terrible place.

00:05:29.260 I saw things that

00:05:30.520 I was able to whisper in your ear

00:05:31.980 and even that stuff, I wasn't...

00:05:33.220 You wouldn't even say it in front of Evan.

00:05:34.640 I wouldn't say anything.

00:05:35.600 You wouldn't even say it.

00:05:36.420 It's just a terrible place.

00:05:37.700 Can't you whisper it into that microphone, Zier?

00:05:40.180 You know I'm always willing.

00:05:41.600 These are things that just...

00:05:43.180 How is this possible?

00:05:44.340 Things that are said through this mic. 0.99

00:05:46.420 Just fucking trust me. 0.99

00:05:46.880 It's that bad? 0.99

00:05:47.720 It's too dark.

00:05:48.520 Just trust me.

00:05:49.060 It's dark.

00:05:49.640 It's dim.

00:05:50.440 Have you ever turned a light off in a room with no lights on?

00:05:53.220 It's just completely dark?

00:05:54.280 Then it gets darker.

00:05:55.140 Now imagine you dug a hole and buried that room underground.

00:05:58.140 That's how dark it is.

00:05:59.600 It's dark.

00:06:00.220 Buried a lot.

00:06:00.460 So just like, but, but shout out to Miami.

00:06:02.480 You guys do a great job.

00:06:03.500 Somehow you ended up with a, with water and his whole city right next to it, which is

00:06:06.720 just great.

00:06:08.360 Liv Grutman, you hit one more button in the next five seconds.

00:06:12.620 I swear to God, dude, you're going overboard.

00:06:15.480 But yo, but yeah, it was crazy.

00:06:16.700 It was a good time.

00:06:17.380 Do you think it's good that Florida is going to be underwater?

00:06:20.900 So then Miami is just kind of like, you just can't go there anymore.

00:06:23.420 Oh, oh yeah.

00:06:24.580 For productivity.

00:06:25.480 I think so. 0.81

00:06:26.080 I would never, um, I don't think I could ever see myself like marrying a girl 1.00

00:06:30.400 from miami like if a girl comes up to me like no offense miami girls but whoo if a girl's like yeah 1.00

00:06:36.260 i'm from miami and she's hot so many red flags well like that girl thrown up tell me i'm wrong

00:06:42.180 no well for you and spencer yes but like i see him and i'm just like that girl like i like i said

00:06:47.860 don't care about calling myself out that girl lexus clark dude is so hot bro okay and she lives

00:06:54.200 there she got a beautiful butt just a really hot girl dude she lives there we hung out for a little

00:06:59.760 while on this past trip miami's got beautiful girls but yeah dude it's just a tricky place 0.98

00:07:05.440 like you never know who's screwing who who's doing who i mean what's the what's different

00:07:09.580 from la it's worse dude it's just worse yeah yeah yeah it's just a really destructive place

00:07:16.500 dude and the biggest problem though is that the parties don't like at least la was kind of

00:07:23.160 sensible like had some sense and said we'll shut things down around 1 32 a.m if you're not at 11

00:07:29.860 at 6 7 a.m you didn't go out and go out it was like you didn't even go out it i don't understand

00:07:36.060 because uh europe is like this too some parts of europe and a lot of places internationally are

00:07:41.060 like this the clubs are open till like 10 a.m the next morning how do you get anything done how do

00:07:46.580 cities even function with this type of degeneracy but you look good i remember i facetimed you that

00:07:52.840 one time and your eyes were swollen i said i said where's mike and you legit like we joke that you

00:07:57.260 look like a potato i've never seen you look more like a potato where's mike and he's and he yelled

00:08:01.940 at the girl you were with because she didn't tell you that you look like a puffy i just asked her 0.98

00:08:05.340 and i like we woke up and i'm like yo my eyes are like really fucked up like i'd been literally just 0.85

00:08:11.120 living off a diet of tequila and like pizza for like days and um my eyes were like closed shut 0.89

00:08:17.060 and she was like no they look fine and then i hit up logan he's like he goes oh my god you look like 0.93

00:08:21.320 shit damn bad well that's hey that's good i mean your real friends gotta call you that's what your 0.90

00:08:26.540 boy does yeah hey can we talk about because i thought it was one last thing people came up to 0.99

00:08:30.360 me at the club at 11 and we're like literally a lot of people and we're like yo your your guys 0.78

00:08:37.020 podcast the best shit ever yeah and there's nowhere i'd rather hear it than watching strippers just 0.91

00:08:42.380 like go down the pole one other wait wait can i yes yeah i was up at san luis abispo at a vegan 0.98

00:08:48.580 cafe completely opposite and the owner of the cafe came up to me dude i'm a huge fan of the

00:08:54.200 podcast i love you so it's like all ends you could have a stripper pool you could have a vegan cafe

00:09:00.280 bro people are out there watching us i got a story too i was in a hermosa beach yesterday and the

00:09:05.560 server like locked eyes with me and i locked eyes with her and it was like this whoa and we both just

00:09:10.140 kind of looked at each other and then she's like uh she's like what do you want i'll take i was

00:09:14.820 like i'll take the like the braised short rib and andre proceeded to tell her she he goes oh yeah

00:09:20.080 he's the beef chief you know because i am and whatnot tell me she said and she no she looks

00:09:24.600 at me she goes oh yeah i bet and i was like oh and it turns out she's a massive fan of impulsive

00:09:30.660 she just got finished uh watching the nelt boys episode did you get her name uh no but she is

00:09:36.560 filipino shout out you filipino no-name waitress from abysmo 11 mosa you just combined everything

00:09:42.760 11 is a club in florida where they give you massages right no that's that's yes that yes

00:09:47.720 they do but the big massage place is tootsie's you hear drake all the time drake was in town

00:09:52.060 that weekend he was at tootsie's a strip club 11 is a nightclub that has strippers which by the way

00:09:58.640 is also owned by our good friend justin roberts from team 10's father mark roberts shout out mark

00:10:04.640 roberts i love you and uh it but it's like very very very hard to get into everybody goes there

00:10:09.600 after live and after story and i wasn't able to get my credit money off my credit card i wanted

00:10:15.560 to take money for my credit card your bro money yes and so finally i had um one of the girls oh

00:10:21.520 taylor kniff's girlfriend gave me 400 and it came with the bands on it with the singles and i here's

00:10:30.880 what i did i was so drunk it was six in the morning i took all the bands off and i went up

00:10:36.220 and i went like this and it just fell it didn't spread out on the ground and the guy came over 0.85

00:10:45.040 with a fucking broom oh no and broomed it and then and then i go wait that that was a little 0.90

00:10:51.580 bit too quick i usually do that a little bit slower huh and like literally the girl was like 0.98

00:10:54.960 this hey and i was like i'm sorry i have no more money left i'm just hey but that's so on brand

00:11:00.280 for you i know just blowing your load in the first four seconds and nothing left that's awesome

00:11:05.760 all right so what else we got dude the art show is also fun yeah so what happened you

00:11:11.020 you found a little a little something you know i'm always complaining about like girls my age and

00:11:17.600 like dating social media stars again we'll get into my brother apparently he's engaged that's

00:11:22.080 kind of a thing what uh but are we fucking up by not talking about that first like the video

00:11:27.060 keeps trying to play well look we're gonna nestle it in here you're gonna find it eventually

00:11:30.760 keep the audience hooked yep um yeah art shows dude it is the perfect spot for some really 1.00

00:11:39.080 classy women if i'm being honest dude and me dude you know my natural inclination is to go the easy 1.00

00:11:45.320 route like beautiful ig girls sliding the dms beautiful ig girls but i don't want a ig girl 1.00

00:11:54.360 I want a woman. 1.00

00:11:55.640 I want a woman.

00:11:56.920 You've been saying it for a while.

00:11:58.040 Yeah, bro.

00:11:58.880 Do you remember me saying that when you're in your 50s,

00:12:01.780 you're going to be a mature, seasoned man?

00:12:04.860 Do you remember this?

00:12:05.440 Why would I not be a mature?

00:12:06.820 No, no, no.

00:12:07.240 But like, classy, bro.

00:12:09.140 Like, above average 50-year-old class.

00:12:12.020 Like, brown suits?

00:12:13.760 Yeah, like corduroys?

00:12:14.760 Yeah, possibly corduroys.

00:12:15.400 Why does he have to wait until 50? 0.99

00:12:16.640 I'm 34 and mature as fuck. 0.99

00:12:18.480 It's just never happened, bro. 0.99

00:12:20.020 I mean, if you keep going to Miami,

00:12:21.260 you're not making it 250, bro.

00:12:24.360 Well, that comedic timing was great.

00:12:26.660 I love that noise.

00:12:28.620 Well, anyway, I did.

00:12:30.400 I saw this girl, bro.

00:12:32.000 Well, woman, I should say.

00:12:33.640 She was a woman. 1.00

00:12:34.920 And she was great.

00:12:36.080 She was so pretty.

00:12:36.880 I saw her.

00:12:39.080 That's it.

00:12:39.860 That was the story.

00:12:40.640 This is actually, you know, for anybody who's like 28 or above,

00:12:46.760 this girl, you know who she is. 1.00

00:12:48.860 And she is smoking hot. 1.00

00:12:50.200 Can we say who it is? 0.91

00:12:51.640 No, don't say the name.

00:12:52.340 Nah, you won't because it's got to.

00:12:53.120 well I didn't know

00:12:53.800 I didn't know

00:12:54.200 it was like somebody 0.90

00:12:54.940 I saw this woman

00:12:56.140 and she was being 1.00

00:12:57.060 super friendly

00:12:57.740 and bubbly

00:12:58.400 and I kind of started like

00:12:59.920 hitting on older women 0.72

00:13:02.040 is interesting 1.00

00:13:02.720 and I also don't like

00:13:03.320 to say hitting on

00:13:04.000 because like the way 1.00

00:13:04.560 I hit on chicks

00:13:06.400 is sort of like 0.99

00:13:06.940 just like a conversation

00:13:07.940 where it's pretty obvious

00:13:09.060 that I'm into you

00:13:09.820 not like

00:13:10.460 pick up line

00:13:11.500 pick up line

00:13:12.140 you're playful

00:13:12.760 I'm very playful

00:13:13.860 and I use like jokes

00:13:15.800 girls love jokes

00:13:17.220 they love to laugh 1.00

00:13:17.860 that's true

00:13:18.260 number one

00:13:18.860 and especially if you're like

00:13:19.720 a young confident kid

00:13:21.420 and you can like

00:13:21.900 you can sling a joke

00:13:23.100 a strapping young man 0.99

00:13:24.400 you can sling a joke out

00:13:25.380 they love it

00:13:25.840 they love to laugh

00:13:26.460 so I was making her smile 1.00

00:13:27.480 laughing

00:13:27.780 I was like

00:13:28.040 oh I think I like this girl

00:13:29.020 and then I asked her friend

00:13:30.420 I was like 0.87

00:13:30.800 yo is she like single

00:13:31.560 what's the deal 0.99

00:13:32.040 and turns out she was

00:13:33.000 and so

00:13:33.380 I ended up

00:13:34.440 asking her on a date

00:13:36.340 and she thought

00:13:37.440 she thought I was joking

00:13:38.580 cause like

00:13:39.260 she was like

00:13:39.760 to her friend

00:13:40.400 she's like 1.00

00:13:40.640 are you guys fucking with me 1.00

00:13:41.540 like is it serious 1.00

00:13:42.440 and I was like

00:13:42.860 I'm serious

00:13:43.880 like what's the worst

00:13:44.620 that could happen

00:13:45.040 you know we go out

00:13:46.000 to wherever

00:13:46.420 we can keep it low key

00:13:47.200 you mentioned she's older

00:13:49.380 did you mention

00:13:50.240 the fact that

00:13:53.100 Oh, she's in her forties, 47 years old.

00:13:56.860 Yeah.

00:13:57.180 I'm going to just throw out some stats and let's see if people can.

00:13:59.140 This is dope, bro.

00:13:59.720 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

00:14:01.740 I'll be easy.

00:14:02.480 It has been a Playboy model. 0.53

00:14:03.680 No, no, no, stop there.

00:14:04.360 That's it, that's it, that's it.

00:14:05.200 That's great.

00:14:06.060 It's great.

00:14:06.500 I'm proud of you, bro.

00:14:07.400 I am really proud of you.

00:14:08.680 Here's the interesting part.

00:14:09.700 She has a, I think her daughter is like 13.

00:14:12.640 Now you're, now you're putting out stats.

00:14:14.460 By the way, look at the hometown, dude.

00:14:16.280 Oh, oh, she said that.

00:14:17.960 Yeah.

00:14:18.200 She said, and I said, I said Hartford, Connecticut.

00:14:21.200 She's like, I'm not Connecticut.

00:14:22.440 You know, it's bonding.

00:14:23.420 Somebody's got three clues out there right now.

00:14:25.060 This is getting dug up.

00:14:26.080 It's definitely getting dug up.

00:14:27.160 It's getting dug up.

00:14:28.160 Hey, listen, please take me back.

00:14:31.200 Yo, I'm low key.

00:14:32.420 I'm high key, actually jealous.

00:14:34.420 We're pumped for you, bro.

00:14:35.780 I'm so pumped about this.

00:14:37.260 Oh, yeah, me too. 0.97

00:14:37.700 I know for a fact I'm going to fuck it up, bro. 0.98

00:14:40.140 This is going to be great. 0.96

00:14:40.980 Oh, they're bright now.

00:14:42.340 They're super bright.

00:14:43.300 I like this.

00:14:44.020 The lights are really bright.

00:14:45.800 That's awesome.

00:14:46.360 I think this is exactly what you needed.

00:14:47.860 well listen bro she has a 12 12 13 year old daughter and i said to the what's going on

00:14:52.440 right now someone put lsd in my coffee dude why is it so bright i think it was i think it was just

00:14:57.360 our effect and i said to the daughter i go after talking to her and like you know um interacting

00:15:02.880 with her like i would any any other fan eventually i reached a point where i just told her straight

00:15:08.100 up i was like hey like i think i'm gonna i'm gonna be the best stepdad you ever had wow which

00:15:13.340 i thought was totally inappropriate so then i followed that up with i've never said that to

00:15:17.620 anyone before and uh then i later told the mom that i'm looking forward to being her daughter's

00:15:22.480 stepdad but it's weird because the daughter's only like nine to ten years younger than me and

00:15:27.820 was she was she was she like oh whoa oh we got late breaking news here on this story well just

00:15:34.140 mike showing me something here on this computer what is it uh i met one daughter it looks here

00:15:38.860 like she's got 10 potentially there it's just an endless list what you just hate this well because

00:15:44.440 multiple spouses multiple children you are you are not we're looking under the hood you are

00:15:49.700 going to be the owner of an orphanage yeah you better be careful bro massive what are you saying

00:15:53.920 dylan that's no no you don't know who it is that's a very fertile woman fertile you got to

00:16:00.860 be careful bro you careful she got great genetics and i mean just going on and she's taking her out 0.96

00:16:06.380 to dinner you might end up having a kid no he wants that i told her that i told her that i go

00:16:11.340 i want a kid she's like oh like because at first i played off like i had a girlfriend she's like

00:16:15.480 like really like are you trying i'm like yeah like pretty hard and she's like and she's like

00:16:20.140 what do you mean really i was like i was like well first i gotta find a girl and then she laughed

00:16:24.100 and like she's fertile dude that's that's a that's a plus well i'm i am jealous i am jealous

00:16:30.280 okay i was i was excited i'm a little scared as you should be i'm scared i know i'm gonna

00:16:35.360 fuck it up for sure she told me her heart's like paper dude she i go i go i go what's the 0.80

00:16:41.260 worst that could happen i go i break your heart or you break mine she goes my heart's like paper 0.99

00:16:46.100 i go oh no not like this like paper we'll see well bro i just yo i just want to give it a go

00:16:53.860 give it a go give it a shot just play it safe right on the merry-go-round all right play it

00:16:58.660 safe wear a helmet if you're gonna go on the merry-go-round wear a helmet if you look at your 1.00

00:17:03.600 chance with her as a ride on the merry-go-round i'm pretty sure you've already fucked this one 0.98

00:17:09.440 bro i don't think that's the right terminology bro it's a very exclusive oh man hey while we 0.98

00:17:19.320 were there though uh milton my boxing coach i don't know like millen is quite the character

00:17:24.720 he might be the most i mean we got a lot of characters in this house but he might be the

00:17:27.800 most eccentric i don't know how much you guys know about milton but he was once like a driver

00:17:32.500 he did magic tricks one at one time in his life like he's always been a hustler and so well he's

00:17:37.420 new york he's from new york new york like a true hustler yeah he's from new york and so he uh

00:17:42.060 he'd take girls to the side like not girls like he'd he'd gather groups of people to the side and

00:17:48.160 start doing magic tricks for them and like you'd always look over milton's entertaining like a

00:17:52.160 crowd of 50 girls love magic tricks everyone loves magic tricks and so i started doing a couple and

00:17:57.220 i'm not gonna lie bro maybe y'all should learn some tricks really what can you do can you teach

00:18:00.880 well i have one here actually let's see what you got what yeah let's do that another time

00:18:05.120 Is there possibly another one

00:18:12.480 That you can do

00:18:13.260 I'm so sorry

00:18:14.980 My brain has just

00:18:16.260 Been so trained

00:18:19.240 I gotta show them at least what I can't do

00:18:22.820 You probably can right at this point

00:18:26.620 Bro it's not bad

00:18:27.560 It's just like you

00:18:28.260 Now everyone's brain immediately

00:18:31.000 Is just like

00:18:32.080 No dude

00:18:33.960 You just can't.

00:18:34.800 You can't do it.

00:18:35.760 All right, listen, I have this rope. 1.00

00:18:37.240 It's a fucking rope. 0.99

00:18:38.940 Who cares? 1.00

00:18:39.480 It's just this harmless rope, dude.

00:18:41.400 Nothing's, nothing's, it's just this ordinary rope.

00:18:43.500 We've all seen it before, dude.

00:18:44.760 Is there any way you can make it straight and not in a circle? 0.99

00:18:47.180 God damn it. 0.98

00:18:47.760 Thank you. 1.00

00:18:48.000 Yo, you ruined my trick.

00:18:50.040 Bro, bro, I'm just talking about.

00:18:52.860 Isn't it funny, bro?

00:18:54.540 It's not funny.

00:18:55.600 Can you do card tricks?

00:18:56.680 Bro, just let me finish the trick.

00:18:58.160 I'm almost done.

00:18:58.940 A cup and a bowl.

00:18:59.940 I'm almost done.

00:19:00.920 Show us the trick, bro.

00:19:02.080 Do you really want to see?

00:19:04.300 Yes

00:19:04.620 Okay

00:19:05.040 Okay so here

00:19:07.280 I'm going to take this rope bro

00:19:08.220 And I'm going to straighten it out bro

00:19:09.140 Because most ropes

00:19:10.060 You know

00:19:10.520 They're in different shapes

00:19:11.400 Besides straight 0.97

00:19:12.120 So I'm straightening this rope out dude

00:19:14.100 And check this out

00:19:14.920 If you hold it

00:19:15.560 Just still

00:19:15.940 Everyone be quiet for me 1.00

00:19:17.300 Oh shit 1.00

00:19:19.740 Are you fucking crazy 1.00

00:19:23.640 You ruined it 1.00

00:19:24.060 You ruined everything

00:19:24.940 Dylan the producer

00:19:26.100 What's wrong with you

00:19:26.900 Well yeah that's my trick

00:19:27.780 This is a stiff rope

00:19:29.140 It's an ordinary rope

00:19:31.840 Thanks, guys.

00:19:32.520 You got a rope stiff.

00:19:33.420 You can do a couple of those, man.

00:19:34.760 Woo.

00:19:35.580 They will get your wheels turning. 1.00

00:19:37.980 Straight into the orphanage vagina. 1.00

00:19:39.840 Straight into the orphanage. 1.00

00:19:42.120 What?

00:19:44.080 What just came out of your mouth?

00:19:45.580 I'm so glad Mike is back.

00:19:47.740 It's the orphanage.

00:19:50.100 The orphanage. 1.00

00:19:52.520 How many kids does a woman have to have before she's got an orphanage? 1.00

00:19:56.740 Orphanage, bro. 1.00

00:19:58.140 Like, is there a limit?

00:19:59.020 In China, you can only have two and a half kids.

00:20:01.020 What's the deal? 1.00

00:20:01.960 Hey, is that true?

00:20:02.820 Yeah, isn't it?

00:20:03.800 How many kids?

00:20:04.360 I think it's only one.

00:20:05.320 Can you have in China?

00:20:06.600 What?

00:20:07.020 How?

00:20:07.340 No.

00:20:08.200 Two children?

00:20:09.080 I thought they'd moved it to two and a half.

00:20:10.640 At one point, it was two and a half.

00:20:11.140 At one point, how can you have half a child?

00:20:12.540 I don't know.

00:20:13.680 I don't know.

00:20:14.440 You got to coordinate with your neighbor.

00:20:16.640 Oh, oh, between you and your neighbor. 1.00

00:20:18.560 Someone gets the legs. 1.00

00:20:19.800 Someone gets the top body.

00:20:21.740 They have to bring a magician with a box.

00:20:24.340 I saw the kid in half and send one half to one. 0.98

00:20:27.260 Oh, it's because China has the world's largest population. 0.50

00:20:31.840 it's still growing yeah overpopulation so yeah two children whoa a lot of people you wouldn't 0.95

00:20:37.280 have been born i was a mistake oh i mean that seems my mom obvious my mom were you a mistake

00:20:46.840 to have something i've said offended you in some way it's just mike we know what kind of jokes he

00:20:52.900 makes come on man you're not a mistake you're vegan so what's the deal with spencer bro in

00:20:57.940 my way i don't know just like he's he's way in love bro if i'm being honest with you what's he's

00:21:01.980 way what do you think that's like bro bro it's honestly my heart warms every time i see him

00:21:07.180 with he goes i went so fucking happy he's like i went up to st louis obispo oh my god with angel 0.54

00:21:11.740 this weekend it was magical oh my god dude no they're always together they took my dog on a 0.89

00:21:16.520 walk the other day it was just like they're doing really so literally so cute it makes me want to

00:21:22.220 just puke all over the place dude yeah and like he's just i don't know i'm i'm proud for him

00:21:27.120 anyways what were you saying about you guys should have girlfriends is that what you're

00:21:30.240 talking about girlfriends over here well you're just doing great guys are lit dude 100 i secured

00:21:35.280 i gotta i got a long-term thing going on right now myself dude really how long

00:21:38.900 i think going on almost six or seven days now one girl for almost a full week i know oh wait

00:21:46.360 you're not lying was with her in connecticut florida miami it's getting pretty uh someone

00:21:51.120 say it's getting pretty serious damn but i think i pissed her off at the club though because i

00:21:55.600 wait wait wait isn't this the girl isn't this the girl that isn't this that one really hot girl that 0.97

00:22:01.880 is in your like county she was and she ignored you when you were in school yeah not in school

00:22:06.120 but like afterwards like i wasn't cool enough and now like when i visit people are like oh

00:22:10.800 because you got that clout now well just a little bit and i'm like yo what'd you say

00:22:15.740 it's hey big mike yeah yo but what about slinging drugs and partying all the time

00:22:23.940 wasn't cool enough for her i don't think she didn't know me at that point like it was after

00:22:28.700 what period was it like uh just post fat mike so like 20 so like 28 bro like 20 and like when i

00:22:36.180 came out and i was like just after fat mike she was banging dudes that were like fresh off jersey 0.89

00:22:42.700 shore i think she even banged a couple jersey shore cast members yeah that's disgusting man 0.98

00:22:46.920 damn i hate to see that i mean they're they they clean up bro they got great greasy i mean i mean 0.97

00:22:52.200 they clean up a certain type of woman bro like what's good well like we've all seen the show 0.97

00:22:59.980 which jersey short characters are you guys which jersey short i'm a situation bro we always got a

00:23:04.940 my name's mike how's that even yeah i think mike's the situation yeah you're paulie d because he's

00:23:09.920 like the most fit he's like the most famous i haven't rock you'd be me i felt i would be paulie

00:23:15.760 oh vinnie guadagnino yeah you'd be vinnie for sure he's cool he's actually most down to earth

00:23:19.340 and kind of chill out no but i told you bro and then the fourth dude is the one that beats the

00:23:23.260 shit out of people right yeah no what ronnie no ronnie ronnie yeah ronnie ronnie okay i told you 0.73

00:23:31.840 yeah you're texting me like i yo i'm taking this girl it's like the girl and i had one of those in 0.98

00:23:36.300 my hometown too and i was like bro something about a following activates the that one girl

00:23:45.040 from your home centrifugal no centrifugal force yes and i still didn't believe it that's what

00:23:50.300 they used for nuclear reactors yes that's and that's what went wrong in chernobyl i actually

00:23:54.840 told him i said hey man i'm out with this girl and i was talking to him and we go back and forth

00:24:00.040 all all the time on these really dumb conversations and he said you got this man and even when he said

00:24:05.620 that i was like yo i don't think i got this i knew he did i knew my boy got it just went to 0.99

00:24:11.060 fucking pound. I've 0.98

00:24:13.060 felt that

00:24:14.960 Logan is just about

00:24:17.160 to get a girlfriend. You're

00:24:18.920 searching, aren't you? I can feel it.

00:24:21.360 I am, bro. Yeah. I really

00:24:23.140 am. What do you think? Do you think

00:24:24.980 girlfriends, like, do you think it's gonna, you got a girlfriend calling

00:24:27.120 you?

00:24:29.340 No, no, no. It's a text from

00:24:31.160 the lady woman with the orphanage.

00:24:33.960 She hears us.

00:24:35.080 I just want to let y'all know

00:24:36.800 this is a triple text. Oh.

00:24:39.060 it is serious dude

00:24:41.280 can you read

00:24:41.720 can you read it

00:24:43.840 it starts with I don't have the kids

00:24:46.540 oh my god

00:24:49.820 wait wait wait 1.00

00:24:50.500 she doesn't have the kids tomorrow night 1.00

00:24:52.420 wow

00:24:54.020 bro what's good bro 1.00

00:24:57.000 side effects of being the shit 0.99

00:24:58.180 I'm gonna write a book and it's gonna be called that 0.99

00:25:00.420 but this is the thing if you're gonna have a kid

00:25:02.620 do you wanna have it with someone who already

00:25:04.820 has a plethora of children

00:25:06.740 here's why yes

00:25:07.640 here's why yes because they can mother the child nope with quite the opposite

00:25:11.700 they have children to mother i can take the child oh so you just take you just

00:25:17.600 we need to we need to explore the custody situation of these other children 0.95

00:25:24.480 because what what if you what if she pops kid out and you don't have custody bro

00:25:28.740 yeah what if she what if she makes up some controversy yeah and they're i mean you're 0.98

00:25:34.180 you're pretty controversial controversial nah y'all are fucking tripping y'all ready for this 0.94

00:25:39.240 okay you have a child with her and then you guys open a small school for all of the children that 0.99

00:25:45.100 she has or a cupcake shop our cupcake shop called what was it called cute cakes

00:25:50.900 cute cakes cupcakes in west Hollywood okay so you open up a school you're all right so you open up

00:25:57.940 of school and you but instead of training them to like do math and arithmetic and english and all

00:26:04.860 that you train them to shoot and edit video we can then fire our overpaid staff here at the house

00:26:11.060 and have the children work for us for a much lower fee wow that's awesome hey no concern on like

00:26:18.460 child labor laws so it was that child paper i what are you saying right child paper that's

00:26:23.260 not different than adult paper um mike yes i had a question for you like say like i want to jump

00:26:29.500 way into the future and like i love i'm sorry if you're listening to this welcome to my life um

00:26:35.240 maybe it's gonna i must exploit myself a little bit here if this were to go the right way

00:26:41.380 is there i'm i'm assuming you make love to older women different than younger women right

00:26:49.480 or do they like that you're like the young man who throws it down different you know what you

00:26:55.380 know what i'm saying here's i think you're gonna get a little bit of both yeah that's true i don't

00:26:59.560 think there's a one-size-fits-all you're you're probably right but here's here's my thoughts on

00:27:02.760 this i think younger girls like from like the 21 to like 24 year old subset call it they think

00:27:13.680 that a guy wants them to throw it down so they're like part fat like they're like get so into it 1.00

00:27:21.500 right but if you asked a real woman for their honest opinion she wants some soul girls like 0.99

00:27:27.160 soul sex wait hold on they just they just do i'm telling you they want because i've heard this

00:27:32.560 before and then i've been with a plethora of girls even ones that i've like i've been with

00:27:37.040 for extended periods of time and it's just not always like that that's true sometimes they are

00:27:41.200 legitimately just freaks yeah and it's great like i'll they've been cooped up with their kids

00:27:45.760 for just kids bro yeah and they just want to go they just want to go to town town yeah i i have 0.53

00:27:51.280 tried like various during single sessions and noticed that damn i'm trying to think of like an 0.99

00:27:58.480 analogy the only way the squirrel has gotten the little fucking nut on the female girl side 0.99

00:28:08.980 of the squirrels has been through 1.00

00:28:11.300 more slow, passionate fucking 0.99

00:28:13.280 unit entry. 0.99

00:28:17.160 It worked for me, sort of.

00:28:20.480 I mean, does that

00:28:21.420 work? I mean, girls, girls, you 0.71

00:28:23.340 lost me when you said squirrel. Like, yo, like, what

00:28:25.360 if you just like Logan, try this. If you do

00:28:27.420 do it at first, try like 0.96

00:28:29.040 nicely supporting her head from the back 1.00

00:28:31.540 with like a light grab and just

00:28:33.420 that really passionate, like, no,

00:28:35.440 I some neck play. I'm being honest, bro.

00:28:37.340 i tend to do that anyways you know what i'm saying okay so you know like that's that's just 0.99

00:28:41.260 hot and then by the way if the girl turns out to be you know like sides uh porn star type 0.97

00:28:47.920 shit goes down do you do you have something in your back pocket that you've never ever 0.99

00:28:54.100 unleashed in the bedroom i do i do what is it a lot what is it logan i have a lot here's my 0.99

00:28:59.840 problem here's my problem don't be like me kids don't be like me i have been afforded the privilege

00:29:06.800 of being lazy he this is so you know what i'm saying like like girls with me they don't demand

00:29:14.300 probably what they should and uh maybe a bit selfish like some girls they'll like instruct

00:29:21.640 me and it's dope and they'll direct me and it's awesome but a lot of girls just won't speak up 1.00

00:29:25.260 dude and uh you know i i've been i've been lucky but i don't think that's gonna fly with a woman 1.00

00:29:31.560 no who doesn't she don't give a fuck about my clout maybe likes my money a little bit you know 1.00

00:29:35.860 but maybe probably not because she has money. 0.98

00:29:38.200 Logan has been quite

00:29:39.760 verbal about the fact that

00:29:41.880 he...

00:29:43.440 I'm trying to think of the right way to put an analogy with this.

00:29:45.880 No more analogies.

00:29:47.340 No, no, no, no, don't say it.

00:29:49.580 He doesn't like to

00:29:51.320 eat the

00:29:53.880 ice cream sundae.

00:29:55.420 It's not that I don't like

00:29:57.800 to eat the ice cream

00:29:59.920 sundae. 0.98

00:30:01.520 The typical LA girl 0.95

00:30:03.440 scares me. 1.00

00:30:05.860 I am a little wary

00:30:08.720 No, no, because

00:30:10.160 If there's a girl that I'm in a relationship with

00:30:13.120 Or a girl who is

00:30:15.060 Like

00:30:16.820 I'm connected with

00:30:18.360 Way more than usual

00:30:20.080 I'll go for it, but I feel like I just don't throw it out

00:30:23.360 Like you dish it out

00:30:25.040 You love it

00:30:25.800 Massive fan

00:30:27.340 Bro, if I get herpes around my mouth

00:30:31.260 Yes, it turns me on

00:30:32.660 Yes, exactly, like Tiana Trump

00:30:34.340 So the risk of her turns you on.

00:30:36.580 No, not at all.

00:30:37.280 But I mean, let's be honest. 0.98

00:30:38.540 Like, I'm pretty sure 90% of this room has like some has had a fucking cold sore at some point. 0.91

00:30:44.280 You think my pure assistant Danny has ever had a cold sore? 0.98

00:30:49.580 Get the shocker.

00:30:52.760 Absolutely not.

00:30:53.960 Whatever.

00:30:55.180 So, yeah, it's a bit risky.

00:30:56.560 But what in life is it?

00:30:57.920 Okay.

00:30:58.340 And doing the dishes, Mike.

00:31:01.020 Waking up.

00:31:02.280 Could be a knife in the sink.

00:31:03.460 There could be a lightning bolt coming down right now

00:31:05.620 Speaking of

00:31:06.660 Speaking of risks

00:31:08.440 You don't eat the ice cream but you've been rolling

00:31:11.620 The hot dog around in the ice cream without the wrapper on it

00:31:13.920 But I never ask

00:31:14.740 But I never ask

00:31:17.140 I'm never like oh like do you give head

00:31:19.400 I never do that

00:31:20.460 It just happens and I'm like oh that's dope

00:31:22.800 I think you missed my analogy I thought it was a pretty solid one

00:31:25.080 You unwrapped the hot dog

00:31:27.560 And rolled it in the sundae

00:31:28.820 That you wouldn't eat the sundae

00:31:30.540 I'm not talking about

00:31:31.540 oh oh oh wow yeah which begs the question what's worth worse mouth herpes or genital herpes i mean

00:31:39.320 at the end of the day dude like i think i think both situations are you just can't go no because

00:31:44.640 oh because yo here's why i ain't carrying around dental dams i don't have a dental dam to just

00:31:49.880 whip out put on my mouth has anybody in the history of mankind ever used one of those

00:31:54.120 supposedly it must have been in this outer space good thing the good thing about herpes though and 0.90

00:32:00.460 it just sucks the good thing about it is you really can only get it one time that's true 0.99

00:32:06.380 can't get it again that's true once you get it out of the fucking way dude 0.98

00:32:09.220 no no it's a really great outlook no don't just be careful i'm i know i preface all this with 0.94

00:32:14.640 saying like don't be like me like i'm not the ideal if i'm like a i'm like an all or nothing

00:32:20.400 kind of guy you know what i'm saying if i if i'm devoted i'm in i'm all in but if i'm not

00:32:26.660 if i'm not all in i'm quite at the opposite end of the spectrum i i i i'm i'm lazy with it some

00:32:31.600 sometimes i don't you gotta work bro you gotta work no no i don't no i don't but i'm saying i

00:32:37.200 don't i should i should plus because yo you here's the other thing a lot of that work dude at the end

00:32:43.020 of the day is training it's almost like a boxing match or a triathlon you can't expect to just be

00:32:49.660 with the school teacher right who runs the school with you and you're with her for a year you've

00:32:56.400 never had an ice cream cone in your life and you're just like going up to it like yo this is

00:33:00.760 ice cream that's what it looks like i could probably figure this thing out you need to 0.99

00:33:03.640 practice dude you need to get in there see what's under the fucking hood and get to work brother 1.00

00:33:08.420 some some women don't they don't want to watch it if there's women that are watching this i need to 1.00

00:33:17.060 hear about this in my instagram dms because there's not been one girl that do you know that 0.82

00:33:21.580 girl who's like i don't i when dudes go down on me it doesn't do that much for me have you heard

00:33:27.100 this i've been told this okay okay so let's let's bring that back to all the dudes here 1.00

00:33:32.340 do you guys know any dudes that are just like please don't suck my dick i know is it is it 0.99

00:33:36.800 it's very it's is it yin yang not exact but i think some there are some guys out there 0.99

00:33:42.920 that would probably say that they're not that good overall yeah i think they're the majority

00:33:47.660 oh oh you're saying you're saying most guys aren't that good at it so girls are trained to

00:33:54.520 not think it's other way around it can be why don't you just say why don't you always gotta

00:34:01.840 quickly point the camera on us so we can ruin our career hey not look are you saying it's a lie

00:34:09.400 are you saying i don't i don't believe it i'm you could be right no no but but but to your point i

00:34:15.220 have heard girls that are like i'm uncomfortable with it i don't know you well enough to let you

00:34:20.560 do that like there's been i think there's there's a lot of that stuff but i think like if you're

00:34:25.040 with a girl that you've been with for a long time and she doesn't want you to do that that seems

00:34:29.920 weird to me and to the the producer dylan's point like he was just saying quietly but he definitely

00:34:35.240 said this it could just be because of the quality of the people they've been with in the past like

00:34:39.120 i mean if either a girl or a guy are basing it on their past partners and they've had people that

00:34:43.220 are shitty at doing it i'll be honest other than like texting or like instagram you're the champ 0.95

00:34:49.460 the third thing i do the most of in this world is is eat vagina dude i'm like an expert dude i've 0.99

00:34:54.580 reached fucking expert level dude do you have a blue check i have i literally have the ownership 0.99

00:35:01.940 of the platform dude i don't need a blue check i give out blue checks bro got it fire got it 0.98

00:35:07.000 girls going down with guys, I think when girls are exceptional at it, that's the minority

00:35:12.100 of girls. 0.98

00:35:13.220 When you're saying girls who are exceptional at giving head, that's the minority?

00:35:18.060 I think that's probably changing. 0.99

00:35:19.260 I was about to say, dude, I am stunned at how many girls know what they're doing now. 0.80

00:35:25.660 I am flabbergasted because it wasn't always like that.

00:35:29.960 In theory, but feeling.

00:35:32.740 Because they're into it and there's a lot of action going on and they're killing it.

00:35:36.320 but does it feel as good compared to some of those that they just there's something extra 0.69

00:35:40.100 some of them got that little technique shout out call her daddy girls really changed in the

00:35:44.820 landscape but but this city like every time he caught like every like it's like it seems like

00:35:51.600 every week he comes up to me he's like hey man i just gotta let you know that was the best head

00:35:55.820 i've ever gotten i go bro i if i put a check mark on my calendar i'm like you've literally said this 0.98

00:36:00.640 me for the past you do though you too you too oh that is you too so we say the same shit true 0.65

00:36:07.300 and everyone because it's it's tough man ever does it just keep going up like yeah i think so 0.98

00:36:14.180 or do you re-appreciate the crap i think that's it i think that's it and by the way shout out god

00:36:19.140 really quick for like making us able to reset every time and never get bored of of of something 0.91

00:36:25.520 like that yeah but that's my question like at what like if we went back and like reviewed the

00:36:30.060 past like six months at what point does one of them really is the best i'll tell you it's

00:36:35.040 i i agree there's always there's usually one or two that is just like whoa you know what if they

00:36:41.700 created like a bachelor type show where like it would be on yo yo i saw this i saw this great

00:36:48.240 i saw this uh tweet from riley reed no that's another thing um

00:36:54.280 i saw this this uh tweet once ohio university ohio university is the first to have bj classes 0.97

00:37:04.900 in america i remember that what and it's like three to four chicks i came from right yeah i

00:37:09.900 went to ou which is why i was like that happened there and there's like a picture of four chicks

00:37:14.000 sitting at a table with like dildos strap i remember i'm like what this can't be real um

00:37:18.620 and i think it i think it came out as fake but i wonder no no no they i think they have it i

00:37:24.660 know bj it's like a sex like a sex education yeah it's a thing i know college approved i don't know

00:37:31.480 i'm on a forum right now it says my ex-wife is from there they need it

00:37:34.640 la is a special place man it's like they it's like one of them i remember one of the last ones

00:37:44.960 this girl i think she had created some sort of anti-gravity vortex like she was literally 1.00

00:37:50.280 levitating above me with just her mouth attached to my dick dude her legs were off the ground her 1.00

00:37:56.960 body was off the ground like this sounds like an exercise there was a blue aura in between her 0.99

00:38:01.440 mouth and my penis this is the weirdest thing i've ever seen this is incredible speaking of 0.98

00:38:05.680 anti-gravity like i think what you're referencing is i have been on a ufo kick lately because bob 0.99

00:38:12.800 Lazar came on Joe Rogan's podcast. I don't know

00:38:14.820 if you guys have seen it. Mind

00:38:16.380 blowing. Yo, you gotta be careful with this

00:38:18.840 shit because I'll lose my mind. Bro, wait, this 1.00

00:38:20.860 guy? How do we know he's not an alien?

00:38:22.900 Come on, bro. This guy?

00:38:25.080 Yeah. He's a stud, bro.

00:38:26.860 Super smart? He's a stud. So in his

00:38:28.900 20s, this is

00:38:30.960 crazy. He

00:38:32.100 put a jet

00:38:34.840 engine on his car

00:38:36.820 and it got picked up by the local

00:38:38.980 news and then the government saw

00:38:41.040 this and they recruited him.

00:38:42.800 And so he ended up, he went to a facility, and then he went to a facility outside of Area 51 after that.

00:38:50.520 And he's, like, the first guy that ever exposed Area 51 back in the 80s.

00:38:55.440 And so when he came out about Area 51, they, like, shunned him, shut all his records down.

00:39:01.420 Like, any history he had, they tried to cover it.

00:39:04.220 Yeah, they buried him.

00:39:05.240 And he revealed some things that didn't get released until, like, 20 years later.

00:39:10.320 so people were really they were denying that what he was saying was true and now they're kind of

00:39:16.420 accepting that what he yeah what he says is proven what did he say he worked on an anti-gravity device

00:39:21.660 that was in an alien spacecraft in so you're saying that he's seen ufos in area 51 so you're

00:39:27.560 saying that girl may have gotten access to the technology she got access to alien technology

00:39:31.640 not only what you described when she was hovering and there was a blue aura bob lazar described

00:39:37.880 that he said when the ufo they they tested the ufos what are you and they said when they are you

00:39:42.480 when they flew them when it lifted off the ground there was a blue aura so this way has when they

00:39:47.540 lifted off she is an alien oh okay okay the girl's an alien yes okay check mark

00:39:52.220 how can you test the ufo they found an actual ufo so they found nine apparently and they were in a

00:40:02.220 hangar he got to see all nine and they were all different so um he was operating they they

00:40:09.200 separate everybody so they're on different teams and it's like a buddy system so they can't all

00:40:14.340 the scientists there can't just talk to each other so it makes it very difficult to do the work

00:40:18.360 because they they want to keep everything top secret apparently so what he was working on

00:40:22.840 specifically was a a reactor that powered one of the craft they were trying to figure out how it

00:40:29.740 worked so he made the the analogy that it's like imagine a ferrari being put back into the medieval

00:40:37.360 times and telling like the smartest people back then yo figure like reverse shut up yeah we're

00:40:42.480 just so they still don't know like what exactly he was on joe joe rogan's dude it's the craziest

00:40:49.360 podcast is he lying no i don't think so man no and there's a there's a documentary on netflix right

00:40:55.880 and um and it's yeah it's it's blowing up right now yeah can you go can you go back to the black

00:41:01.480 and white picture of him really quick this one just like yeah that he looks like if an alien

00:41:07.740 civilization was like we need to create one that looks like them like he he looks like that would

00:41:12.820 be the what they created he's like a spitting image of see to me to me he looks like a genius

00:41:19.140 that's what i see i see i see a guy who looks like a genius i just said that they were i mean

00:41:25.820 His hair is incredible.

00:41:28.160 They were trying to figure out how the reactor worked

00:41:31.140 because it's powered, like, it doesn't have a fuel source,

00:41:35.020 and it doesn't heat up when it's turned on.

00:41:38.040 And when it's turned on, it's an anti-gravity device,

00:41:40.480 so you, like, can't even get close to it.

00:41:42.660 Whoa.

00:41:43.600 It's crazy, dude.

00:41:44.400 And then when they opened up the spacecraft and they went inside,

00:41:48.560 there was, like, three little seats.

00:41:50.260 Like, it wasn't human size.

00:41:51.800 It was, like, for, like, three feet tall, you know, something.

00:41:55.340 Heaven?

00:41:55.820 to be it could have been it could have been i could have been heaven he could have made it

00:41:59.520 but there was three seats around the reactor and they could fly it is it like i love this kind of

00:42:04.880 stuff i really do but is it hot can i be like kind of skeptical yeah can i can i ask i i'm not

00:42:11.020 gonna be skeptical but like now what now that we know there's like now what i mean if you think

00:42:15.340 about in the fact that it's it happened well if you think about what they're why are they hiding

00:42:20.000 that from us who area the government yeah because if you have safety and control and control right

00:42:26.760 i mean listen because if you have that kind of technology you could do anything right and and

00:42:32.340 think about if we have if we know about a technology that can give us unlimited power

00:42:38.900 produces no heat why would we use fossil fuels money well i mean if they don't know how to make

00:42:45.700 and they just have one this goes to that conversation about what we were talking about

00:42:50.680 earlier which we're going to talk about with the next guest later today which is that utopian

00:42:54.440 society if we found an unlimited power source so we didn't need to use money or fuel or anything

00:42:59.400 like that it would start to create a utopian society and that means the government loses

00:43:02.860 control all of that all of the shakiness and like um wars and all that stuff creates a need for

00:43:10.880 control and that's what that's what the government provides you know what i'm saying that's how they

00:43:14.400 keep us under their control right you know what i'm saying so it's like so that's why stuff like

00:43:19.720 this coming out is really important if it is true because if we know that this type of technology

00:43:26.460 exists and there's people trying to control it that's really important hey don't you hell yeah

00:43:30.820 dude not like oh there's aliens everyone should know he's like there's science and technology

00:43:36.260 being suppressed and that's the main problem okay but don't you think don't you think if that's true

00:43:42.860 and what he's saying is true,

00:43:45.420 don't you think like

00:43:46.320 respectfully the government would kill

00:43:49.500 Bob Lazar off? They tried.

00:43:51.620 What do you mean they tried?

00:43:52.360 They tried to shoot him

00:43:55.020 and they missed. Who tried to shoot him when?

00:43:57.900 He was shot at.

00:43:59.440 I'm not getting any details here.

00:44:01.160 Was he at TCBY getting frozen yogurt?

00:44:03.340 Is he in TSA checkout?

00:44:04.560 It's in the documentary.

00:44:05.400 He was shot out when he was on the highway

00:44:07.240 and then when he was with his neighbor doing stuff

00:44:09.560 during the day, his neighbor would carry a doozy with him

00:44:11.440 because he was strapped to the neighbor.

00:44:12.860 And then he was shot at

00:44:14.500 Sorry the neighbor was strapped with an Uzi

00:44:16.800 Did he live in South Central

00:44:17.860 The neighbor shot the Uzi at Bob Lazar

00:44:22.140 Or the neighbor protected him

00:44:23.680 His shot out neighbor

00:44:25.800 We should watch his documentary tonight though 0.97

00:44:27.900 I'm down it's next level

00:44:28.940 I've been on a weird kick though

00:44:31.520 I've just been going down deep into some UFO rabbit holes

00:44:34.120 That's awesome man

00:44:34.560 That stuff boggles my mind

00:44:37.200 Tell you what

00:44:37.780 Where are the aliens though

00:44:39.600 Did he say anything about the actual alien life

00:44:41.480 that wasn't his like i was saying they apparently keep everything super separated so um like people

00:44:49.860 that were working on different parts of the ships or like if they found the bodies and were

00:44:56.520 somewhere else he never got to see that because you don't want somebody to have all the info it's

00:45:01.320 too much of a risk so they silo the yeah i bet you russia has like their own i wonder if like

00:45:08.760 the countries know what each other have because russia has probably had so many crashes in

00:45:13.820 siberia like in that massive expanse so like they probably have technology and then the u.s is like 1.00

00:45:19.620 yo putin you keep your alien shit and don't hurt us we'll keep our alien shit and we won't hurt 0.99

00:45:25.420 you and let's just fucking i would presume do fucking i uh i've officially now just made it a 1.00

00:45:30.580 item on my bucket list i want to i want to see some alien technology some alien tech before i 0.99

00:45:35.340 die let's go to roswell and do a documentary on the people when i was in a freshman in high school

00:45:40.720 we had uh this section in our physics class called um i think it was called faux science

00:45:45.940 and the teacher put that as one of the slides or the aliens of roswell

00:45:50.080 faux science well that just goes to show like how much there's people out there trying to suppress

00:45:55.780 that kind of i mean but is it like my my teacher like mr package pseudo pseudo science yeah no

00:46:01.560 it's it's mr why would he lie to me well that's not him he's fed that well the problem with

00:46:07.460 conspiracy theories and really any of that kind of like uh anti-government sometimes like call

00:46:11.940 propaganda or like truth like that stuff is the problem is you never know if it's someone running

00:46:18.960 interference or by the way if it's just not true and some people spend their entire lives trying

00:46:24.180 to uncover this truth and never do right you know it's just yeah what's crazy in this particular

00:46:30.120 particular situation is that he he let people know about like very specific things that got

00:46:37.080 declassified yeah like there was this uh technology where they would like in order to gain access into

00:46:42.160 the facility they would put their hand down and it would measure the the distance in your bones

00:46:46.400 biometrics yeah um yeah and that would grant them access and people were like no that doesn't exist

00:46:51.760 and then it came out later that that facility was using so he knew about biometrics before

00:46:56.820 biometrics came out for the general use exactly he's telling the truth what if he just took a

00:47:01.420 stab in the dark well he also pretty accurate stabs good i mean sounds like yeah exactly hey

00:47:06.780 all right that's crazy you know what's crazier yeah pull me out of this rabbit hole man my brother

00:47:11.040 is engaged is he though jake are you doing no do is is it dude my initial reaction was yes this is

00:47:20.260 like a a publicity stunt but then i'm like this is dude with tattoos all over his body yep

00:47:27.360 hard he got an earring hard he's done some silly things didn't you do the nose person yeah and i'm

00:47:32.820 not sure this is quite above him i i couldn't agree more like i think i think he might have

00:47:38.460 done it how are his views doing man is this is this an act of um he's gotten so much press from

00:47:42.920 this e-news e-news like that's why i didn't get me a fine honey but check it out youtubers jake

00:47:48.180 Paul and Tana Mongeau are engaged.

00:47:50.360 It will definitely be a birthday to remember.

00:47:52.860 Tana reveals the proposal news on Instagram

00:47:55.020 in videos from her 21st B-Day bash in Las Vegas. 1.00

00:47:58.000 It's fucking... 0.99

00:47:58.880 Dude, see this? 1.00

00:47:59.920 Just kidding. 1.00

00:48:02.820 Bottle girls, just with a cake.

00:48:04.720 How romantic is this?

00:48:06.240 Will you marry me, Tana?

00:48:07.820 And then Jake just doing his cholo.

00:48:09.720 I lean like a cholo.

00:48:11.060 Was the ring he gave her a ring pop? 0.98

00:48:13.060 Oh, she had a ring pop on earlier.

00:48:14.400 Big old ring.

00:48:18.180 See, this is where I get

00:48:20.180 Look it, look it

00:48:22.920 She said it's not a stunt, man 1.00

00:48:33.920 She's the S-word 1.00

00:48:34.740 Like, like, is it

00:48:36.780 Andy bought her a car recently?

00:48:40.980 What's good?

00:48:41.900 It's crazy, because, you know, the easiest way

00:48:44.660 the easiest way to know that someone is not like joking about something or doing a stunt is if you

00:48:50.520 ask them flat out hey is this a stunt and they say it's not yo but i mean you then for sure for

00:48:56.180 sure no there's no doubt let me let me go on record as to say this i'm with you at one point

00:49:01.600 i thought maybe this was all for clout or whatever and then having seen all of this i know that it's 0.99

00:49:08.240 all for clout 100 of this bullshit dude they're not engaged they're not getting fucking married 0.98

00:49:12.060 If you're out there and you think Tana Mongeau and Jake Paul are in love, 1.00

00:49:14.480 you're a fucking moron, dude. 1.00

00:49:16.080 Well, I was going to ask because like Tana said, she said it's not right. 1.00

00:49:20.140 So at what point do people just stop believing anything she says?

00:49:25.180 And Tana, you know, I love you.

00:49:26.440 She's going to guest host the show.

00:49:27.520 I'm just curious.

00:49:28.220 Maybe she won't now that we exposed her fingers.

00:49:30.320 I actually Googled it.

00:49:31.280 Look at the BuzzFeed news.

00:49:32.460 Why people don't believe anything influencers do anymore.

00:49:34.780 Here's why fans are doubting Jake Paul's and Tana Mongeau's engagement.

00:49:37.900 So do you think, question, if you think,

00:49:40.140 I don't know why I had to say question because I was just,

00:49:42.060 stating a question um do you think that if this comes out that it's fake this will damage

00:49:47.000 jake's what is there to be damaged uh you know what i'm saying yo listen listen we have been

00:49:53.700 we have been talking about this a lot over the past couple weeks the state of like influencer

00:49:59.740 and the state of what is being done on youtube and instagram these like the pictures that people 0.98

00:50:07.620 post of these like just such dumb shit inauthentic content yeah i filled my pool i threw a dart at a 1.00

00:50:16.380 dartboard my dryer i turned into a rope like what is this shit dude what the fuck so like i like 1.00

00:50:23.040 that's why i like entertainment what is it though it's like i dressed up as a cactus and stood in 0.99

00:50:27.280 the desert you know what the name picked up by the term for is called the term for is called

00:50:30.840 mindless entertainment so that's and you know why i know and i can relate and i'm cool with it

00:50:35.400 Because when we went to Ohio, there was a point where I'm like, what do I do?

00:50:38.940 There's nothing to do here.

00:50:40.340 I will literally watch or do anything.

00:50:42.480 And it just clears your mind.

00:50:44.400 It relaxes you.

00:50:45.500 You can take a break from your day and just watch stuff.

00:50:47.720 Does it?

00:50:48.220 Or is it in a form of escapism?

00:50:51.780 What is that exactly now?

00:50:53.220 Escapism?

00:50:53.840 Are you familiar with David Blaine?

00:50:55.240 Yeah.

00:50:55.560 Have you seen him escape something?

00:50:56.600 Oh, escapism.

00:50:57.360 Escapism.

00:50:57.780 Got it.

00:50:58.880 Are you escaping?

00:51:00.340 Yes, it is.

00:51:00.900 But so what?

00:51:03.700 Everyone needs to escape, Spence.

00:51:05.000 where you're just going to be grinding all the time like you you you escape every night at 10

00:51:09.360 p.m i go where you going smith i'm just going to angels going to angels no but like but like i

00:51:14.480 think we're i think with this show and with some of the other people that are producing content

00:51:19.000 constant content right now you're starting to see an era usher in of people that are giving 0.97

00:51:23.840 offering some sort of value do you know what i'm saying like we talk about cool shit on the show 0.90

00:51:27.640 we talk about funny shit on the show like but actual talented comedy not like i turn my carpet 0.97

00:51:33.720 into a pillow and slept on it for 26 days outside overnight like that that age is over step your 0.99

00:51:40.880 fucking game up yo i think very few people like mr beast can wear that but he is owning it yeah 0.98

00:51:46.720 he puts his like giving shit out to real content you know he actually does it uh are you referencing 0.99

00:51:52.460 like clickbait do you think yes do you think that generation which is interesting because 0.94

00:51:56.780 logan you've been mentioning that you've done a different uh thumbnail yeah we have show your

00:52:03.220 new thumbnails we've changed the uh the style of thumbnail um we're doing here i'm sorry i just got

00:52:09.080 distracted by jake's page wait wait before you leave if you look at the view curve right here

00:52:15.160 all right now you observe a typical average view count now when you pull up the results are in of

00:52:22.240 jake and tana's pregnancy test you have 5.3 million so this may encourage a uh a publicity

00:52:29.520 stunt that you're absolutely right oh you think that influenced them to do it i mean well i mean

00:52:34.500 let's be relationships thrive so right anything you do i can't see the name but whose views are

00:52:39.780 these bro we're definitely thriving right now like uh views are averaging more than i think

00:52:47.860 maybe we've ever done we've got a couple bangers here but yeah we changed the style of thumbnails

00:52:52.180 so they're a little more uh raw now and it seems to be working like like this one i i i thought

00:52:57.140 was really interesting and someone actually made a video about this called the redemption of logan

00:53:01.140 paul and they touched on this video it's like this thumbnail is just raw and it's interesting

00:53:06.320 so people click it 3.7 million views um and they're just frames from the video do you remember

00:53:11.960 the do you remember the start of do you think it's because people are sick of just these annoying

00:53:17.480 that's what mike said we may be reaching a trend and by the way i think it's a i think it's a

00:53:22.100 recycle because the beginning of youtube vlogging and youtube content was real like do you remember

00:53:28.300 shay carl remember shay carl and his family and his wife and ruin everything stop relax forget that

00:53:34.660 part but think about some of the early vloggers think about some of the yes they would walk around

00:53:39.320 with their camera and they'd be like i'm just going in the refrigerator right now i'm gonna 0.98

00:53:42.220 get myself some cheese yeah but that shit's whack but bro no one cares if you're getting cheese you 0.98

00:53:48.080 know what they care about a lot of people engaged there's a lot of new cheeses on the market but 0.98

00:53:52.200 actually i would i think i think though that people without the ability to make hey i'm just

00:54:00.460 getting some cheese entertaining correct because i asked people on twitter by the way i'm like i'm

00:54:05.400 gonna make a new video on my youtube channel what should i what should i talk about the number one

00:54:09.480 answer was i'll be honest with you anything you want we'll watch it because you're an entertainer

00:54:13.580 you're funny you know you know you know who does a really good job of this i think it's austin

00:54:17.480 mcbroom yeah videos don't have a ton of cuts nothing pretty raw you just can watch the dude

00:54:23.260 yep and his wife and his kids fun to look at fun to watch entertaining like and it's real that

00:54:29.620 might be the wave that might be the wave i think it is here's the problem i'm finding what view

00:54:34.520 averages is as high as they were as it was in 2017 maybe a bit higher um does not translate

00:54:40.860 to subscribers if you don't post uh as frequently as like a daily type situation it's slow man

00:54:48.360 it's fucking slow so you you were just about tied up with your brother he was maybe like 80k behind 0.84

00:54:57.640 you a couple weeks ago and we pulled it up on the show your views have gone way up and your subs are 0.98

00:55:03.200 almost at you're at 19.41 he's still at like 19.1 he's at 19.2 19.1 something yeah he's like

00:55:13.080 4 000 away from 19.2 that's what i'm saying like uh you're like inside a youtuber's mind right now

00:55:20.180 it's like do we do the cheesy i turn my dryer into a robot fill my pool with orbeez and bang

00:55:27.280 out that daily content that like unfortunately people just do love to watch and digest or do

00:55:31.720 we do higher quality videos where like maybe your the your brand value increases but you don't sell

00:55:39.160 as much merch you don't get as many followers across all platforms and most importantly the

00:55:44.300 subscriber growth is not that great the the one so what do you you're sacrificing one thing for

00:55:49.080 another and i'm at a crossroads the one thing that i've pushed you to do or to desire more than 0.99

00:55:55.720 anything else since i've joined up here is to do shit for the fucking culture bro 0.99

00:56:01.160 to be fucking cool do shit that you want to watch at your age and do shit that you want people at 1.00

00:56:07.180 your age to watch but okay i think you have i think you've aged up and i think a lot of people 0.99

00:56:11.200 watching this show right now and a lot of people watching your vlogs especially the 10 million on

00:56:16.040 the boxing are of an older i absolutely agree but then the question is like at what point do i got

00:56:23.620 to play the game a little bit the game of youtube and get the subscribers and and uh plug the merch

00:56:28.860 i just think you gotta you just gotta be careful with playing that game because if you lose like

00:56:37.920 what mike's saying which i really resonate with is if you're making content for to to gain

00:56:44.260 subscribers instead of making meaningful content to your already existing subscribers i'm not saying

00:56:50.860 don't do that i'm just saying be careful because i'm gonna be optimistic here yeah and say there's

00:56:56.420 a world where you can do both yeah i'm sure there is and by the way we're walking three days a week

00:57:01.100 some sort of really fucking efficient workflow with the editors like uh even the way we give

00:57:10.840 hayden the footage maybe perhaps and this is just an example an editor we find can chop the fat off 0.81

00:57:17.100 the vlog and then hand it to hayden where he comes in and makes the story um by the way that's

00:57:24.080 yeah chris that's what he's here to do what's up bro he somehow became my editor too yeah

00:57:29.960 he's great it's hilarious i'm about to sign a 10 video contract with him because are you really

00:57:33.800 yeah because oh shit you're making bank halo and and jeff want me to go daily bro they're like yo 0.91

00:57:38.860 if you're gonna get a half about what i've it's just sitting down i don't really want to spill 0.91

00:57:42.860 it right now but i'm gonna do yeah i won't say it yet but bro 80 000 subs almost 400 000 views 0.53

00:57:48.160 spencer has views on his one video but i'd like to see him follow it the fuck up hey i'm gonna 0.55

00:57:52.520 start making content i'm gonna start doing three to four videos per week are you ever gonna put 0.73

00:57:56.400 angel in your content hell yeah you are we've already been filming we just filmed yesterday

00:58:00.600 does she like it yeah i'm always nervous she's really good on camera i believe you i believe

00:58:06.180 you but sometimes bro these girls who especially don't come out of the entertainment industry 1.00

00:58:12.540 are like put the fucking camera down and kiss me on my mouth yeah bitch no she's not she talks 1.00

00:58:18.420 she understands she understands i i think she understands mainly because of like what we're 1.00

00:58:24.080 doing you know like saving the planet saving the planet saving the world i and yo like one more

00:58:29.940 thing you did that like video with uh high sky for face gland uh quick apology to tfue and corinna

00:58:38.700 i just want to say like i like it was funny what i oh i gotta hear this i don't know no like it

00:58:43.680 was funny and uh i didn't really understand what's happening they told me right before it

00:58:48.380 happened that it was turner's bed which just it's just so unfortunate like i had just come from the

00:58:54.440 airport might convince me and like and turner bro i like you like you you know that what happened i

00:58:59.720 need some context so they so obviously there's this continuing to expand beef between phase and

00:59:04.980 tfue i of course am friends with banks and tov and all the guys over at phase clan i also at the

00:59:11.080 same time have been really pushing logan to do more collaborative content i like when he collabs

00:59:16.420 and like i like when we collab and if we're gonna collab i prefer to do it with someone that's about

00:59:20.920 the culture like i just said phase with yadi and juju schuster and all these people that are

00:59:24.800 rappers and athletes and everybody's watching phase what are they going to do next so i'm like

00:59:28.860 they asked logan to be a part of a diss track that the 12 year old gamer high sky was making

00:59:34.060 against tfue he he made a line in the in the diss track that was like i saw corinna at logan's house

00:59:40.780 i think it's over for you or whatever and so they were like with logan pop in for a cameo i was like

00:59:45.140 let me i mean let me see what he's doing he was at the airport so he just popped in i watched the

00:59:48.360 video bro but it wasn't like a cameo it was the weirdest this is the part i don't understand they

00:59:53.260 just they edited it and made it seem like logan like was a feature on the track it was weird and

00:59:58.040 they just popped him in at the weirdest times they didn't pop me in for the line they didn't

01:00:01.740 pop him in for the line like i thought he was popping in just for the line like got you like

01:00:06.040 a quick cameo they put him in like the beginning of the video like 10 seconds in of him just rolling

01:00:10.380 around on this mattress well because i show up to the house what's so weird and they bring me

01:00:16.360 into this room and there's like lights everywhere and the dude turns on a fog machine and by the

01:00:19.580 way it's just me and this dude mike like caught it got cut off and distracted by banks and so it's

01:00:24.260 me and this dude this ball guy and he's like all right now just lay down on the bed he wasn't even

01:00:28.560 done with this sentence he goes just wait down lay down on the bed i was like wait and i left 0.98

01:00:32.220 and i came out to mike i was like mike phase banks does anyone want to tell me what the fuck 0.96

01:00:36.740 is happening he goes there's a weird bald man he's got a smoke machine in the bedroom he's asking me 0.91

01:00:41.180 to lay down in the bed i was like dude just and by the way take this lesson the old me would have

01:00:45.820 done it the old me would have just done it because i was there and like i want to be a like a 0.77

01:00:49.420 collaborative partner new me is like i'm not gonna do anything i don't fucking want to do ever 0.98

01:00:53.640 anymore so were you nude they had my dick up see but yeah it gets fishy i was it's just tricky 0.98

01:01:01.100 because like you know i like to face kids and i do like turner and i i hope they can make amends 0.98

01:01:06.040 and corinna like i said this before i think she's a sweetheart uh i don't listen i thought it was in

01:01:11.020 good fun it was everybody knows that tfue and corinna are dating she we haven't talked to her

01:01:16.140 she hasn't been at the house well she did come to the party and by the way she was very nice

01:01:20.240 and just she's very nice i love i love corinna she actually was probably my favorite girlfriend

01:01:27.560 that you've had once you see this older girl i know i love listen i'll tell you what though 1.00

01:01:33.740 if i bring the older chick here the woman she is not gonna put up with this environment for 0.97

01:01:38.940 that long i gotta i gotta figure something out can you imagine if like in like three months i

01:01:44.520 like come back from a trip he's got like a button up to the top button with a bow tie and his hair

01:01:48.980 First, come over to the side.

01:01:49.800 I'm telling you, bro.

01:01:50.540 Mike, good to see you.

01:01:51.440 Caramel suits, dude.

01:01:52.680 Caramel suits.

01:01:53.280 He's dusting.

01:01:54.020 He's dusting.

01:01:54.880 Yeah.

01:01:55.440 Oh, speak.

01:01:55.900 One other thing on Faze Banks.

01:01:57.520 I'm going on a no jumper tomorrow with him.

01:02:00.000 I wonder what's going to come out of that.

01:02:01.380 What an odd combo.

01:02:03.220 Well, I'd ask my co-host from Impulsive to go on it,

01:02:05.540 but I think he's busy or something.

01:02:07.500 I don't know.

01:02:07.720 I'm free.

01:02:10.000 I don't know how you would do in that atmosphere.

01:02:11.720 Yeah. 0.99

01:02:12.160 There's a good chance there will probably be some porn stars on the set. 0.98

01:02:15.420 Yeah. 0.74

01:02:16.220 I should probably stay away from that.

01:02:17.220 What an interesting combo.

01:02:18.360 I asked you

01:02:19.780 No I know

01:02:21.240 You have a Forbes interview

01:02:22.280 You have a Forbes interview

01:02:23.420 Oh

01:02:23.840 We're coming back

01:02:25.720 Forbes won

01:02:27.440 My finger hurts 0.96

01:02:30.400 I think I fucked it up 0.98

01:02:31.320 Chasing that guy down 0.97

01:02:32.760 Should we wrap it up?

01:02:34.220 How long have we been going?

01:02:35.380 110

01:02:35.740 Oh yeah 0.97

01:02:36.580 Let's get the fuck off this set 1.00

01:02:38.020 Bullshit 1.00

01:02:38.620 We've been going for a minute man 1.00

01:02:39.640 Sick of it

01:02:40.140 Hey good job

01:02:40.820 I really like these podcasts

01:02:41.940 With the boys

01:02:42.500 Just can talk about life man

01:02:43.900 It's real great

01:02:44.640 You got any other final notes?

01:02:46.320 Yeah man just do good things 0.90

01:02:47.740 challenger games oh my god real quick oh i'm the fastest fucking youtuber all right and that's a 0.99

01:02:55.080 fact i'm gonna put my dick on the line for it what's your mile time or like what's the what's 0.99

01:02:59.820 the race that you're referencing 100 meter 100 meter sprint okay yo i am quick and not just 0.99

01:03:05.460 not just like you i'm a fat i am fast and so i tweeted um i put a hundred thousand dollars that

01:03:13.100 i'm a fat i'm the fastest youtuber and man the response has been incredible everyone wants to

01:03:18.820 race me chad ochocinco came out of the walls he said he wants to put 300 000 on it jake wants to

01:03:23.740 put 300 000 on it somebody else hit you up um drake bell yeah drake bell um drake drake also

01:03:30.200 wants to race uh just everyone man and so i'm i'm gonna be i'm like this is the first time you're

01:03:36.060 gonna hear it this is a this is a literal impulsive exclusive i'm sorry i had to bring it out of him

01:03:40.100 but here he goes we're hosting a a track meet some of the biggest entertainers in the world

01:03:45.400 we'll see who's the fastest in i think nine events the money's going to be going to charity

01:03:50.500 it's going to be fucking great it's going to be live streamed you can donate and hopefully i want

01:03:53.440 to raise like literally millions of dollars for charity for this uh for this event on july 27th 0.56

01:03:58.100 groundbreaking july 27th challenger games this is this is big and by the way we are working with

01:04:04.260 some of the largest like that's that's the that's the other thing it's not just like we had this

01:04:09.060 idea we're kind of slinging it together it's it's uh our main guy's doug de luca he produces

01:04:13.620 he's the executive producer on jimmy camel and um the the people who are actually producing the

01:04:18.160 event are the same people who do the x games so it's like it's really really legit i want to i

01:04:22.960 want to involve some big celebrities comment below if you see or know any uh big celebrities you want

01:04:26.760 to want to see in the challenging games i want i want zach efron i think we're gonna make a push

01:04:30.180 for efron i think he just tore his ac although i think that might no no i was i think he's coming

01:04:34.360 back and he just started his youtube channel he should be he should be better or um or also

01:04:39.240 halftime performers we really really we want to we want to nail down someone we wanted why don't

01:04:45.780 beyonce really bad we did want why don't we they're in uh they're in milwaukee which by the

01:04:50.860 way until you say milwaukee you forget that's a state it's not that's what i said yep yeah you

01:04:56.480 just forget that it's not a state it's funny because you know who actually just got back

01:04:59.520 from that state fidel castro from the uh from the cartel all right listen guys thank you for

01:05:04.560 watching this episode of impulsive we're gonna do an exclusive who knows we're gonna talk about 0.99

01:05:07.540 there i'm sure it's gonna be fucking degenerate man these all guys episodes are fucking fucking 0.85

01:05:11.680 fun it's a good time please subscribe for us rate us five stars in the itunes store 0.97

01:05:17.400 spotify itunes right now for the exclusive impulsive audio only we freaking love you

01:05:22.240 we'll see you next so i just got a text message from matt zingler who's the um

01:05:27.640 that he started rolling loud the rap festival yeah and he said can you hit the guys from

01:05:33.660 wireless they don't want t to do the sound check do you think he meant to send that to you

01:05:38.780 and who's t poor guy can't do the sound check incapable i feel bad for you t if you're listening

01:05:44.840 to this i can't imagine you are but what should i come up with like a witty response yeah yeah

01:05:48.960 i don't know just say what if he didn't mean to send it to you and he wants me to do the sound

01:05:53.680 Just say the sound check is A-OK.

01:05:55.480 Sound sounds great.

01:05:56.400 Have y'all ever done that where you've been thinking about someone and you accidentally send the text to them?

01:06:03.280 The worst thing ever.

01:06:05.480 No, the worst thing is when you are texting someone, they say something about someone else, 0.94

01:06:13.360 you screenshot it, and then send it back to the same person you just fucking screened. 0.97

01:06:18.020 It's horrible. 0.99

01:06:19.060 It has happened to me.

01:06:20.320 How do you play it off?

01:06:22.000 Here's what I say.

01:06:23.680 I don't know how that happened.

01:06:26.160 I somehow screenshotted and sent a screenshot to you.

01:06:29.460 These new Apple phones have crazy...

01:06:31.600 Sorry, I've done that.

01:06:34.740 How else can you?

01:06:36.260 Because there's no other way to get distrusted.

01:06:39.840 No, no, no.

01:06:40.500 Or do this.

01:06:41.360 I just came up with it.

01:06:42.620 Take the screenshot, send it to them, 0.99

01:06:44.340 and then when you realize you fucked up, 1.00

01:06:45.880 say some shit like, you sound stupid. 1.00

01:06:49.420 Or like, you sound... 1.00

01:06:51.420 You're screenshotting the conversation. 0.71

01:06:53.220 sorry that's that's right that's exactly like look look how silly we are because you're just

01:06:59.020 reminding them of a conversation we just had but yo it gets worse it gets worse like here's what

01:07:03.320 i'm talking about when i was when i was in high school my dad and i got a huge fight and he was

01:07:07.900 just being dick physical uh no push it down the stairs it's mental not this time no because

01:07:13.080 eventually i got big enough where he couldn't push me down the stairs that's strength ends 0.92

01:07:17.280 yeah so um he dropped me off at my friend max house and when he dropped me off finally and

01:07:23.200 because you know i had to convince him and pull his pull his hair to get me to get give me a ride

01:07:28.000 when we got there i texted doesn't really have hair there's no hair i hear what you're saying

01:07:32.800 when i got there i i texted my dad on accident i meant to text like mom or something i was like

01:07:38.760 yeah that dickhead just dropped me off and i sent it to dad and this was before

01:07:45.240 like these conversations were like i didn't know this was a thing heart dropped oh it was over for 0.98

01:07:51.540 me and i he texted back he goes did you mean to send that to me or no he said he said uh who's 0.79

01:07:57.420 the dickhead you're talking about and i was like i am so sorry dad i feel so bad and i love you and 0.98

01:08:03.700 i don't think he's gotten over to this day wow because you're trying to like talk shit about 0.99

01:08:10.100 him behind his back we just directly to him it's rough and i don't like any of that and i've done 0.95

01:08:17.120 it with girls too oh yeah girls have done it girls have done it with me and i give them a little bit

01:08:22.440 of leniency because i get it and i've been there i've i but just double check just double check 0.55

01:08:28.740 always double check your recipient before and and the cc on the emails oh my god that's way

01:08:35.440 that's way worse that's way worse because i've done that before i actually sorry that's happened

01:08:40.620 to me as the remember that it's happened to me as the as the recipient where the person was like 0.88

01:08:45.720 who is this random kid that lives in la and why is he running this pro like all this shit and um 0.98

01:08:51.700 and i responded to everyone except him and i wrote damn this guy must be fun at parties 0.99

01:08:57.600 like like just everybody else except him and everybody was laughing on the fucking 0.98

01:09:01.480 i have a i have a major win from an email situation actually i was in a lawsuit 0.94

01:09:06.380 where somebody i'm not i cannot get into details on this but uh somebody deleted all their emails

01:09:12.960 but i owned the account and uh i gained access to all those emails i found them i was able to

01:09:20.240 pull them out of the trash and i found like all these people they were emailing so email can save 0.93

01:09:25.780 your ass too yeah oh yeah yeah it's clutch but it's probably more like that why were they talking 0.99

01:09:30.180 shit oh yeah they're like doing business through my company with other people i feel like you're 1.00

01:09:35.220 already talking about shit you're probably not supposed to be right now nah i'm good i know who 0.99

01:09:38.960 you're talking about man yeah i should probably skirt around that though hey have you seen uh 0.99

01:09:42.400 maybe we should talk about this in the next podcast yeah i think it'd be good oh that's

01:09:45.560 that's perfect for the next guy 100 all right well what else do you have any that that guy

01:09:50.360 that guy paulie megalini uh he's good there's bare knuckle fighting is now a thing he just

01:09:55.320 fought some dude named artem lobov lobov artem one they're both boxers apparently but

01:09:59.980 bare knuckle fighting yo i thought the uh ufc was crazy with their small little gloves but

01:10:04.400 bare knuckle that's too far for me and dude i wouldn't i wouldn't watch that and after michael

01:10:08.660 j white was on our last podcast i was like why didn't you become a professional combat sport

01:10:12.920 person and he said it's not worth it and it's just not there's so much on the line you're just

01:10:17.780 taking that's just we've devolved we've devolved back to like gladiator days but and that's why

01:10:23.140 it's awesome like let's be honest it's fucking awesome it's like one of those things that brings 0.98

01:10:27.060 back like the natural human desire to pound someone's face in it's just some primal shit 0.97

01:10:33.940 some real primal man is that good or is that bad though i mean it's not i think i think with 0.97

01:10:39.300 controls it's it's fine what do you know what are the controls in a bare knuckle fighting here's

01:10:43.720 here's why here's why it's good man like if he's doing it if he's chasing his dream if he's getting

01:10:47.840 that bag providing for his family like yeah and and by the way that's the one thing he's good at

01:10:52.080 bro. A lot of athletes are fucking stupid. I'll just say 1.00

01:10:54.140 they're morons. This is the only issue I have 1.00

01:10:56.240 with that argument because I've felt that

01:10:58.140 way. If you're providing

01:11:00.040 the bag, then

01:11:02.140 of course there will be people there to get

01:11:04.120 it. Like if you're giving people the

01:11:06.160 money to bare knuckle fight. So you want

01:11:08.200 the whole, you're telling like the whole fight

01:11:10.200 league, anything

01:11:11.940 that's impossible, but

01:11:14.200 that's easily a better argument than telling him

01:11:16.220 not to do it. Cause here, cause here's my thoughts on

01:11:18.020 everything. Similarly to anything

01:11:20.020 else that happens in this day and age that is 0.98

01:11:21.960 taboo or or rough or whatever my thought on it is if it doesn't affect you don't fucking worry 0.98

01:11:28.220 about it you know what i'm saying if people want to beat the shit out of each other in a league 0.99

01:11:32.880 that's fine if people want to fuck i'm not going to use any other examples because all i'll do is 0.98

01:11:38.700 get in trouble but i was going to say if people want to yeah well all right forget it i feel you 0.99

01:11:44.100 yeah if you want to do it do it yeah just don't want to watch it don't watch it yeah and don't

01:11:48.140 complain about it yeah big facts but but but to your point there's mike sorry no i was gonna cut

01:11:54.300 it dude yeah i think we should wait to get ready for our next guest he's a big one thank you guys

01:11:58.380 for listening to impulsive guys only guys only we'll see you next time

01:12:01.120 Lisa, tell them about our new show.

01:12:16.140 We have a new podcast.

01:12:17.560 It's called Don't Lie to Me.

01:12:18.920 I'm Lexi Iwanu.

01:12:20.100 We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart.

01:12:24.060 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references,

01:12:28.660 occasionally different opinions.

01:12:29.680 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

01:12:32.920 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes, Good Taste is my business.

01:12:37.980 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:12:44.700 I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast.

01:12:50.460 The true crime comedy podcast, all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it.

01:12:54.840 Each week, I bring on an amazing guest.

01:12:56.740 Ooh, I scammed them.

01:12:57.920 What?

01:12:58.200 I could talk to you for an hour.

01:12:59.960 You're a generational yapper, like me.

01:13:01.980 That's why I had to make yapping a job.

01:13:03.940 And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube.

01:13:07.200 Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app,

01:13:10.180 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:13:13.140 Scam Goddess!

01:13:14.960 Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman.

01:13:16.600 Angela Jaritana.

01:13:17.540 Jeremy Culhane.

01:13:18.240 Patrick McDonald.

01:13:19.160 And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists podcast.

01:13:22.980 The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast,

01:13:24.720 where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

01:13:28.840 Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

01:13:31.920 And we do a little Halloween sometimes.

01:13:34.140 Does the Pope dress up?

01:13:35.460 He winks on Halloween.

01:13:37.740 He gets right up next to the microphone.

01:13:39.460 I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other.

01:13:42.560 You've never seen Italy so quiet

01:13:44.880 as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween.

01:13:47.880 Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists

01:13:50.180 every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app,

01:13:52.260 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:13:55.460 I'm Hamza.

01:13:56.200 And I'm Martin.

01:13:56.860 And we're the hosts of Out of Character,

01:13:58.320 the best podcast in the world, is that what they said?

01:14:01.060 Wait, they said that?

01:14:02.080 Yeah, yeah, they said that.

01:14:03.360 The best podcast with two best friends

01:14:05.500 who jabber and talk about topical, trendy, funny stuff,

01:14:08.920 give our input on it.

01:14:10.040 That's what you've needed, I think, up until now, listener.

01:14:12.520 Listen to Out of Character on the iHeartRadio app,

01:14:15.040 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:14:17.800 Sometimes I just feel like a burden.

01:14:19.400 You're a bird.

01:14:20.140 You fly. 1.00

01:14:20.820 You're a Martin.

01:14:21.280 and we are out of character podcast dude you messed up the clip

Impaulsive with Logan Paul - June 26, 2019

A MESSAGE TO JAKE AND TANA - IMPAULSIVE EP. 93

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Transcript