Impaulsive with Logan Paul - E162 Logan Paul is a BAD Booty Call - IMPAULSIVE EP. 162

00:00:00.160 Breaking story from Alpine News Network.

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00:00:30.480 Lisa, tell them about our new show.

00:00:33.060 We have a new podcast.

00:00:34.480 It's called Don't Lie to Me.

00:00:35.860 I'm Lexi Iwanu.

00:00:37.020 We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart.

00:00:41.000 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one,

00:00:43.360 which means we have wildly different references,

00:00:45.600 occasionally different opinions.

00:00:46.920 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

00:00:49.700 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes,

00:00:52.720 Good Taste is my business.

00:00:54.900 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

00:00:57.800 or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:01:00.000 i'm hamza and i'm martin and we're the hosts of out of character the best podcast in the world

00:01:06.340 is that what they said wait they said that yeah yeah they said that the best podcast with two

00:01:11.100 best friends who jabber and talk about topical trendy funny stuff give our input on it that's

00:01:16.580 what you've needed i think up until now listener listen out of character on the iheart radio app

00:01:21.260 apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast sometimes i just feel like a burden you're a bird

00:01:26.340 You fly. You're Martin.

00:01:27.860 And we are Out of Character Podcast.

00:01:30.060 Dude, you messed up the clip.

00:01:31.980 I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast.

00:01:37.520 The true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it.

00:01:41.920 Each week I bring on an amazing guest.

00:01:43.800 Ooh, I scammed them.

00:01:45.000 What?

00:01:45.460 I could talk to you for an hour.

00:01:47.000 You're a generational yapper, like me.

00:01:49.000 That's why I had to make yapping a job.

00:01:50.980 And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube.

00:01:53.860 Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app,

00:01:57.240 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:02:00.180 Scam Goddess!

00:02:02.120 So I just pulled back, bro.

00:02:04.040 I light this joint, and I start smoking, bro. 0.96

00:02:07.280 Next thing you know, I'm high as f***ing. 0.96

00:02:08.840 All right? 0.97

00:02:09.340 Nice.

00:02:09.640 And I'm laughing.

00:02:10.620 That's a deadly combination.

00:02:11.520 I'm laughing the whole time. 0.97

00:02:12.060 Yo, I'm high as f***ing. 1.00

00:02:13.700 I got a ballistic missile as a penis that I can't feel. 1.00

00:02:23.860 my lord's a jewish carpenter dude jc oh jc oh good old uh jc was a carpenter a jewish carpenter 0.99

00:02:32.600 and an episcopalian did you know that jewish carpenter is also that's not true at all

00:02:36.660 that's weird i just thought of it before you said it oh yeah you're a linguistics expert

00:02:41.860 welcome to the show oh thanks and welcome to the show to this show impulsive the number one

00:02:48.560 podcast in the world we're about to hit two million subscribers are we about to hit two

00:02:52.300 i don't know finally it's at like five already you know what the numbers experience a slight

00:02:57.700 boost i think a lot of people from the vlogs are coming over they're interested in us when we talk

00:03:01.880 at length long form what if they're just a bunch of jerker offers from lana rhodes channel i i worry

00:03:08.300 about that because we we think so mike's getting numbers on his vlogs and like instagram he's 0.90

00:03:12.440 popping off everything but i'm worried they're just masturbators they just turn on my channel 0.96

00:03:16.100 And they're like, what can I wank off, dude? 0.99

00:03:18.000 Bro, some dude.

00:03:20.080 All right, so Mike's girlfriend thing sort of is like an adult film star. 1.00

00:03:23.500 We all know Lana Rhodes. 1.00

00:03:24.780 And some dude DMed Mike, and he said, hey, man, just had to wank to your girl. 0.60

00:03:30.280 I get.

00:03:30.780 Like, how often does that happen?

00:03:33.620 It's not okay.

00:03:34.720 Like, it's not cool.

00:03:35.500 You couldn't do it to anyone else.

00:03:37.240 I'll tell you why it's not cool.

00:03:38.460 All right, ready? 0.99

00:03:39.580 Imagine you masturbate, right? 1.00

00:03:41.480 You do your thing. 1.00

00:03:42.180 We're guys.

00:03:42.820 We do that.

00:03:43.180 the first thing you do is pick up your phone and dm another that's weird that part that part's

00:03:49.780 weird he's admitting his own fault for me for me it doesn't for me it doesn't it doesn't bother me

00:03:55.940 that much you guys have to understand bro for someone to be like open enough life-wise to have

00:04:01.000 a relationship with someone who has done a 10-person gangbang obviously they don't really 0.99

00:04:06.020 give a fuck that much if you're jerking off to that like like what are you gonna say to me that 0.99

00:04:10.020 i honestly give a fuck about i just i more so care about the kid who's like just he's like 1.00

00:04:14.400 really saying hey mike i'm so alone right now and i'm thinking about you like he just jerked 0.99

00:04:19.760 off your girlfriend but like why would he message you like he's that alone i jerk off to mike's 0.87

00:04:23.780 girlfriend you said in the vlog yeah and it's a it's it's you know why did you tell me about it 0.93

00:04:29.300 okay yeah i did in the vlog okay so maybe it's the right thing to do i have no way yeah go ahead

00:04:33.660 here's why dude yeah lana rhodes can we say her name or real name no no okay

00:04:39.760 people people i'm sure it's out there but it's not what about first name no just let's just all

00:04:43.300 right can i give her an arbitrary name yeah of course let's call it let's call her stephanie

00:04:46.880 okay so lana roads is a stage name stephanie is is the girl in real life yo lana roads is not

00:04:51.980 stephanie at night close not even not even close like i tell people this like i'll have my girls

00:04:57.020 ask me like oh yo what's she'd like like i've never hung out with a porn star i'm like i'm like

00:05:00.100 the girl you meet in real life stephanie is not like a porn star she's just like a like a fun

00:05:04.100 like down-to-earth girl normal girl who's really oddly like driven and passionate more so than

00:05:09.220 even us like all she does is like work that's all she does by the way that's one of the reasons why

00:05:13.700 me and her get along so well is because i'm actually quite turned on by her by her work 1.00

00:05:18.160 ethic i mean she wakes up she grinds she is she is stephanie is a boss ass bitch she makes 1.00

00:05:24.920 in case you didn't know this she makes way more fucking money than me she's constantly trying to 1.00

00:05:30.740 buy me shit which i don't want her to and i haven't let her but like that's and that's a 1.00

00:05:34.940 side note but she is a boss yo she works constantly she's always working she's always 0.99

00:05:39.780 running her snapchat her her uh merch she's got a merchandise company that does really well her 1.00

00:05:45.060 clothing but yo to your point contrary to the to that thought and you know against the the way the 1.00

00:05:53.060 rest of the porn stars that we've met are she is very reserved in real life she's not this sexual 1.00

00:05:57.960 deviant that you guys have have have come could you imagine but she can become that right 1.00

00:06:02.700 She throws down 1.00

00:06:04.520 She throws fucking down of course 1.00

00:06:06.240 Compared to the gangbangs 1.00

00:06:07.920 Stephanie's not out there like swallowing seven swords

00:06:10.860 At one time 0.97

00:06:11.560 And she actually 0.90

00:06:12.980 Does not like cum 0.97

00:06:15.320 I find that so weird 0.99

00:06:17.340 She actually despises it

00:06:18.840 Her reaction is get it off of me

00:06:21.000 How is that possible Mike

00:06:22.800 Okay so ready for this

00:06:25.360 Here's the observation I've made 0.98

00:06:26.920 She is so driven by business 1.00

00:06:30.020 And by making money

00:06:31.940 and being financially secure and financially independent

00:06:35.300 that she went and did things over the course of eight months. 0.95

00:06:38.820 Now, keep in mind, she worked for eight months.

00:06:41.200 That's it. 1.00

00:06:41.900 Eight fucking months. 0.99

00:06:43.180 And it's been number one. 1.00

00:06:44.820 Eight fucking months. 0.99

00:06:45.780 And has been number one for however long. 0.99

00:06:48.840 But the reason I think she did things,

00:06:51.040 which she has told me she really did not like doing all that much,

00:06:54.780 was because there was a ton of money in it.

00:06:56.500 And so I think now that she doesn't have to do those things anymore,

00:06:59.880 like well i'm glad she's done daily clogging yeah daily clogging i mean obviously i mean

00:07:05.420 people ask me like there have been some people they've been like yo what happened with emily

00:07:09.480 or like what happened with this girl to be honest with you like i don't know if i could date a

00:07:13.420 currently performing adult film star that's i just that's yeah like like she come like i just don't

00:07:19.440 know if i could do that i spent a lot of time with them and i and i had a lot of fun with them

00:07:22.660 but i just don't know if i could be serious like she doesn't do it anymore she's retired i want to

00:07:26.760 ask a question it's a question that we uh have been going back and forth in this house yeah um

00:07:31.540 what is what's what's better what's more desirable i don't know how to say this uh 1.00

00:07:37.800 so porn stars women who fuck on camera um versus like a girl in la that doesn't fuck on camera 1.00

00:07:45.820 here but has sex with exponentially more men than the porn star does and and the listener for because 0.99

00:07:52.060 i tweeted about this and the person listening to this doesn't believe this and they don't they 1.00

00:07:55.880 can't wrap their mind around it but there are girls in la that i know very well that go out

00:08:01.120 to warwick and hide and poppy on mondays and they're out four to six times a week that have 1.00

00:08:07.620 exponentially more bodies than even your favorite veteran porn star these these porn stars 0.99

00:08:15.920 at the highest level like i said on the on the garcia podcast are having sex with a very small 0.83

00:08:21.680 stable of very elite men in the industry because there's like there's like seven to ten like

00:08:26.420 major male actors who are by the way tested constantly now from the outside people look

00:08:34.740 at porn stars they say oh that's that's horrifying like how could you ever date one these aren't even

00:08:38.580 people and they have their thoughts about them but then they go to warwick and they leave and 0.67

00:08:43.460 have unprotected sex with a girl who has put down 75 to 100 bodies already in 2020 and has not been

00:08:50.160 tested since 2018 so it's it's it's all very murky water but it's also to me

00:08:58.140 i don't have to explain myself like this like lana has been married has been married for the

00:09:06.880 past three years she's just which is like another like fascinating uh conundrum here like now that

00:09:14.340 part to me is more fascinating than the porn part the porn part i can get by you have a past i used

00:09:19.120 to do heroin

00:09:20.180 I used to do heroin

00:09:22.880 every single day 0.99

00:09:24.380 every single fucking day 0.99

00:09:26.940 I would wake up and the first thing I would do would be 1.00

00:09:28.960 heroin

00:09:29.360 so like no and no one says oh Mike

00:09:33.140 like you used to do 1.00

00:09:35.000 that for eight years I can't believe a girl would date 0.99

00:09:37.000 you no one says that but they say oh she 0.89

00:09:38.840 used to have sex on camera and so like

00:09:40.660 like I said none of this is perfect 0.77

00:09:42.720 it's all very strange to me but

00:09:44.280 I think it gets in the way of like people's

00:09:46.800 ideal relationship between 0.84

00:09:48.500 other people right like oh my god i've seen your girlfriend having sex like congrats i i have to

00:09:56.000 i have to really check myself here because like that sentence has no effect on me anymore like

00:10:02.840 i'm i'm so numb to everything dude and i have to imagine that in like the real world like because

00:10:07.380 we really are numb to a lot of things because we're bubbled up we're in this bubble more so

00:10:11.760 than even the la bubble like our life is is just this weird thing that makes renders us uh emotionless

00:10:18.760 to a lot of things that like strike people a very very different way than it does us and i get and i

00:10:23.500 get it and i know you get it too i get it very viscerally i understand that and and and by the

00:10:28.140 way it's it's it's not something that i was just automatically like yo this is what that's nothing

00:10:32.720 like what she chooses to do with her but like yes i deal with that i have of course i've it's an

00:10:37.160 obstacle that i've had to overcome you know what i'm saying but it was strong but but but but like 0.97

00:10:44.000 yo like you know like what the fuck are you gonna do she's a sweet girl she's driven she she makes 0.96

00:10:50.240 you so much better which is what what i what i am most fascinated about you mike stopped eating 0.99

00:10:54.640 carbs he went on a juice cleanse yesterday twice he ran twice on a goose cleanse

00:10:59.020 one day i didn't eat any food not not no bad food i ate no food yesterday i mean it was juice

00:11:05.880 i had juice but more than anything i'm not since the new york situation i have 0.91

00:11:14.160 fucking i i'm i'm i'm hands off bro and i really thought that once all these girls found out 0.99

00:11:21.740 that i was in a relationship dude respect the relationship and kindly fuck off oh is that 0.99

00:11:27.040 what you thought uh that's where you're always oh every time you're in a relationship is the only 0.99

00:11:33.660 time that the champs come flocking at you it is so bad everyone knows it is so bad everyone knows

00:11:39.560 when you're single life wants you to be single when you're taken life wants you to be sing

00:11:45.040 wait when you're single life wants you to be taken right and when you're taken life wants

00:11:48.140 you to be single i have a picture here we went out to a a party evan invited us to it's actually

00:11:52.680 pretty good and this is mike now like when we go out this is this is staple mike just in the

00:12:00.100 corner balled up closed off not looking for any interaction from from anyone really maybe some

00:12:05.480 guys telling them they like their their show the night show but um no no women allowed and i i saw

00:12:13.080 i have to give my friend a pat on the back because oh my god you did a good job and i noticed that

00:12:17.400 women were throwing themselves at you because of this really mike i went up to my room i went up

00:12:23.600 to my room bro it's 1 a.m and i'm not i'm not really trying to trying to throw down this night

00:12:29.860 right so i go up to my room to go to sleep you're already in bed and a girl comes skipping out of

00:12:36.320 my bathroom a girl that david invited random blonde girl i was like what the i was like hey

00:12:40.260 dave there's a girl in my room and dave comes upstairs and she's like hey you know she'd been

00:12:45.320 partying on she's like hey like uh where's mike and i was like i can't tell you because i know

00:12:51.920 mike's wifed up and you just can't like you just can't she goes where's mike i'm horny and i want 0.99

00:12:57.820 to fuck i'm like first off you just skipped around my bathroom like you gotta go go you have to leave 1.00

00:13:03.740 you gotta leave right now i start getting dms wait don't don't move the spectrum oh shit who's 1.00

00:13:09.540 this demon over mike's shoulder just hiding in the back oh my god i don't know how i feel about 0.98

00:13:13.660 dude i start getting these dms oh my god i actually don't know about that that might be

00:13:19.740 oh it's me oh no even worse i i told you that night because that because because that was one

00:13:26.760 of the girls right there that david brought home hey can we say that cool no i'm not saying names 0.69

00:13:32.460 but that's half of her face like i don't think anybody's gonna fucking identify her but he brings 0.64

00:13:36.060 these two girls back home and i go to logan i go hey man i need you to just monitor the situation 0.91

00:13:43.340 Let me know what you're seeing.

00:13:44.360 Maybe I'm imagining things.

00:13:46.460 I have posted myself on the farthest lovesack

00:13:48.760 away from all of the action.

00:13:50.040 I am hands off.

00:13:51.000 I'm not even talking to anyone.

00:13:52.480 I've said not a single word to anyone.

00:13:54.060 You were standing there.

00:13:54.740 I'm on my phone.

00:13:56.300 All of a sudden I look

00:13:57.460 and now the girls are on the lovesack next to me.

00:14:00.680 Then I look again

00:14:01.460 and now the girls are on the lovesack with me.

00:14:04.100 Now I look again

00:14:05.040 and one of the girls' hands 1.00

00:14:06.060 is slowly approaching my penis. 1.00

00:14:07.560 Now I look again 1.00

00:14:08.620 and this girl has crawled inside of Mike's body.

00:14:11.840 and she is taking over my soul no so i go i go i go i'm sorry guys i didn't even say anything

00:14:17.120 actually i didn't even say anything i went into my bedroom and i said this is the only place that

00:14:22.120 i'll be safe they don't know me they don't know how to find me two minutes later i get a dm where

00:14:27.640 are you i start getting those disposable pictures the bombs that explode that say let me come up 0.98

00:14:35.020 i can keep my mouth closed with with the zipped mouth emoji i go this can't be fucking real 0.97

00:14:43.200 why am i because yo yo i'm sitting there by the way i have a i got a boner now dude like like 0.97

00:14:49.240 this girl's on the attack but i know that if i've fucked this up with lana again bro there's no 0.90

00:14:55.060 coming back from it bro and so now two minutes later i get another dm at this point i'm furiously 1.00

00:14:59.420 masturbating dude i'm like i'm gonna clear these fucking pipes out this girl's got no chance even 1.00

00:15:04.540 if she comes in the room i'm gonna have a wet noodle dude that's it she goes all around the 1.00

00:15:09.960 house it finds her way into logan's room so i'm like perfect she'll just fuck logan i've been 1.00

00:15:13.900 through this i've been through this before yo yo in the past i would have stepped up to the plate 0.99

00:15:19.060 i i'm in a very weird spot in my life i i you're all i have i have way up i have trouble having 0.67

00:15:26.260 sexual intercourse with women who i'm not like super attracted to mentally right like if i don't 0.98

00:15:31.420 know you i'm not gonna like i can't just can't fuck a stranger anymore i you've been changed 1.00

00:15:36.260 anyways i was i'm punching the pillow at this point and it just i'm like fuck fuck i'm texting 1.00

00:15:41.360 a lot i'm like where the fuck are you she's like babe we hung out six nights in a row it's probably 0.99

00:15:44.420 not good do we hang out tonight she called them codependent no they said they were yeah we were 1.00

00:15:48.600 codependent i'm like where the fuck are you babe it's 1 a.m i fucking need you and she's just not 0.99

00:15:53.160 responding and i'm like fuck this is gonna and she never found my room needless to say i made 1.00

00:15:56.720 to sleep i woke up the next day as a proud monogamous non-cheater nice nice by the way 0.99

00:16:03.400 it could get no worse it could get no worse there is a girl actively hunting your icbm yeah she is

00:16:09.180 a missile hunter dude do you think it was a defensive boner that you had yes i was scared

00:16:14.400 for my life yeah yeah some people have that reaction but that's interesting about the

00:16:18.900 codependency and how much they've been hanging out later well she she called so they have been

00:16:22.880 together a lot and uh i don't know how i feel about it right so i like i do something nice

00:16:27.920 for my friend i lose my friend i guess so but it's interesting because she called out

00:16:32.480 that they were becoming codependent and she like suggested that they don't hang out when i thought

00:16:38.940 that was like i gotta give like major props to stephan yeah facts uh yeah she's great she's a

00:16:44.240 smart girl i uh she's meeting some of my family tonight at a dinner we're all going to so who

00:16:48.380 wait wait that's a big oh well no it's not no she's meeting the parents no she's oh you know

00:16:55.060 who's i'm coming to the day oh it's like the first i'm in the first my little sister my little

00:16:58.860 sister yeah easiest one to test on right so i can't wait for abby to meet stephanie

00:17:04.220 stephanie um before we went to that party i wanted to mention this really quick

00:17:08.820 before we went to that party we're in an uber and uh mike's like down the street he's like

00:17:14.660 Mike's like, Logan, look.

00:17:17.100 And I look. 0.99

00:17:18.200 I see a motherfucking coyote sprinting down the street. 0.99

00:17:21.760 This is my chance, bro. 0.99

00:17:23.100 Because I didn't forget.

00:17:24.520 I didn't forget what they did to my dog.

00:17:26.040 You could never.

00:17:26.860 Ever.

00:17:27.220 Did you forgive?

00:17:28.640 No.

00:17:28.900 No.

00:17:29.740 And I'm sure I'll outgrow this, but I still want vengeance.

00:17:33.600 So I get out of the car, and me and Max start chasing after this coyote.

00:17:37.660 Bro, I'm dead sprinting.

00:17:38.660 Coyotes are fast.

00:17:39.780 I'm dead sprinting down the street.

00:17:40.840 We're going up the hill.

00:17:41.840 And I'm actually gaining some distance on him.

00:17:43.760 I'm pretty fast.

00:17:44.660 Fastest man on the planet.

00:17:46.360 And then I'm sprinting. 1.00

00:17:48.780 My fucking ankle twist, bro. 1.00

00:17:50.660 I hit a curb wrong. 1.00

00:17:52.060 My ankle goes.

00:17:52.880 I'm like, no.

00:17:53.960 My ankle twist.

00:17:54.780 Coyote goes under a fence.

00:17:55.680 Disappears forever.

00:17:56.480 Gone into the night of ghosts.

00:17:57.860 An apparition, somebody said. 0.99

00:17:59.220 So now I'm like, damn it. 0.99

00:18:01.460 I just tried to chase a coyote. 0.99

00:18:02.640 I rolled my ankle.

00:18:03.680 I'm 0 for 2.

00:18:05.220 I'm 0 for 2.

00:18:06.320 And now I'm mad.

00:18:07.960 So again, I've said this before.

00:18:09.220 My warning for all the coyotes listening to this podcast.

00:18:12.120 I haven't forgotten.

00:18:13.420 I'm coming for you. 1.00

00:18:14.660 You kill my dog, and you force me to roll my ankle. 1.00

00:18:17.240 I'm really upset at this point. 0.98

00:18:19.140 They took your child, and now they've stolen your youth as well.

00:18:21.980 It's gone for me.

00:18:22.720 I can't walk. 1.00

00:18:22.960 You're a feeble man now. 0.98

00:18:24.140 I can't walk. 0.57

00:18:25.120 Bro, we got to that party, and he's like,

00:18:26.460 I really hope no one presses me tonight because I can't move.

00:18:30.460 You sounded like that guy.

00:18:32.500 You were the guy that had the spinal surgery.

00:18:36.760 I'm like, bro, because this wasn't a typical L.A. party.

00:18:41.020 It was just a crowd I hadn't seen before. 0.97

00:18:44.260 And I'm like, yo, if one of these fucking dudes wants to test me tonight, I'm in serious trouble because I can't really feel my ankle. 0.98

00:18:50.840 Yo, and we're low-key, like, what are you telling me to say? 0.99

00:18:54.380 I'm going to jerk myself off. 0.99

00:18:55.560 We're fucking peaking, bro. 1.00

00:18:57.800 What? 1.00

00:18:58.460 You don't think so?

00:18:59.280 No.

00:18:59.780 What are parties been like for you lately? 0.93

00:19:02.340 Bro, it's been pretty fucking wild lately, dude. 0.99

00:19:04.760 How many fucking— 1.00

00:19:05.420 Well, fucking not everyone's the shit like you, Mike. 1.00

00:19:08.160 Mike's pretty cool. 1.00

00:19:08.980 He's being an asshole because the amount of pictures I saw you take at the past three parties— 1.00

00:19:13.380 I was never going to talk about it. 1.00

00:19:15.120 Well, you told me when I was going to.

00:19:16.960 You know who had a great time at that party? 0.99

00:19:18.460 Can you just ever just meet me on this fucking wave light? 0.97

00:19:20.780 Evan's literally the coolest guy. 0.98

00:19:21.780 And I wasn't even saying it like that.

00:19:23.400 I was just saying no one was going to press you,

00:19:26.080 and it was a weird party because there was just so many people

00:19:28.100 that were just like.

00:19:30.100 Bro, you threw me off.

00:19:32.300 You got that clout.

00:19:33.160 You got that clout now.

00:19:34.520 And you're semi-new to it, bro.

00:19:36.300 Mind you, I've been here for five years, bro.

00:19:39.020 That's true.

00:19:39.660 I get it.

00:19:40.640 Yeah, that's true.

00:19:41.580 I've been here. 0.99

00:19:42.640 yeah but the coyote did fuck you up you were fucked up it just that that animal is is is uh 0.99

00:19:47.880 yeah i don't like it it's pretty wily um he just keeps hitting you over and over yeah i i like 0.98

00:19:53.080 especially when you're down too i want to tell a story i want to tell a story um this is one of

00:19:59.920 those moments where i i i can choose whether or not to exploit my life especially my love life

00:20:07.900 which i try to keep secret but i'll just do it i'll i'll do it all right so uh

00:20:13.240 i'm i i can be a pretty horrible booty call oh god this is this is good stuff i can be a really

00:20:21.960 bad booty call last night was a prime example of that no wait i thought you i'll tell oh i didn't

00:20:27.980 tell you this story yet i love when you tell me stories too this is great all right so i get the

00:20:34.700 booty call text and uh i wasn't in the mood yesterday like i'm i'm i'm like i'm not asexual

00:20:40.940 but i'm just my libido is low lately because i think we've been blogging what'd you call it

00:20:44.800 it's a demisexual like a demigod who has sex anyways i get the booty call this girl's beautiful 1.00

00:20:52.540 and you know we've had our fun in the past so i say i say yeah fuck yeah come on come on to my 0.99

00:20:58.220 house even though i know i'm like yeah i can't get up right now like i i want to go to sleep 1.00

00:21:02.940 i want to watch a movie and go to sleep right but i said yes um so this poor girl came over 0.99

00:21:08.040 and she's stuck with an asexual blabbering moron all i care about is making jokes making people 1.00

00:21:12.540 laughing laughing with my friends in my boxers so uh last night she came over and she's she's 1.00

00:21:18.160 like i don't want to watch a movie she's like grabbing me and she's like i don't want to watch

00:21:20.880 a movie let's go upstairs i was like uh i kind of just want to watch the movie is that cool she's

00:21:26.100 like no i was like all right and on my way upstairs hold on can i put one pin in it sure

00:21:31.160 When you were kind of

00:21:32.620 At one point when you were kind of telling her that you 0.99

00:21:35.220 You were like wanting to watch the movie and shit 0.99

00:21:37.820 She made a recommendation 1.00

00:21:39.160 For something to happen

00:21:41.980 Are we?

00:21:42.700 No

00:21:43.040 Okay sorry

00:21:44.180 Anyways

00:21:44.900 We're gonna skip that far

00:21:45.900 I go upstairs and

00:21:47.740 David's laughing

00:21:50.120 He knows exactly what I'm talking about

00:21:51.120 I heard from the other room but

00:21:52.380 Under the stairs there's this 0.98

00:21:54.400 There's this penis numbing spray 1.00

00:21:57.580 Have you guys heard of this shit? 1.00

00:21:59.300 you spray and it numbs your wee wee 1.00

00:22:01.740 is it the same they want to sponsor it

00:22:03.800 that's oh that's why they're do we have the product

00:22:05.960 to test

00:22:06.460 oh they didn't want to pay the point is i tested it

00:22:09.940 bro because i was bored so i do 0.98

00:22:11.840 what every normal man with penis numbing spray 0.99

00:22:13.800 does i know 1.00

00:22:15.760 my penis 1.00

00:22:16.280 so now now i have to tell this 1.00

00:22:19.880 girl who's ready to go we're in bed

00:22:22.020 she's like come on let's do this i'm like

00:22:23.760 i'm like i have to be honest with you i'm not in the mood

00:22:25.920 at all and i just sprayed my 1.00

00:22:27.900 my dick with dick numbing spray i can't feel anything she's like what the fuck is wrong with 1.00

00:22:31.700 you what's your problem so so i have a wet noodle bro and i'm in bed just like this and uh now we 1.00

00:22:38.480 got a problem right because i can't i can't i'm useless but it's a problem that you had a solution 0.99

00:22:44.140 for you sick little fucking sly dog little did i remember our sponsor is bluetooth 0.99

00:22:53.560 anyways if you love sex you'll love blue true.com and i do like sex blue true offers men a performance 1.00

00:23:01.860 enhancement for the bedroom because we all like to last a little longer go a few extra rounds

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00:23:18.020 and it ships to your door directly in a discreet package they give you confidence in bed every

00:23:23.120 single time you and your partner will love it my favorite saying to it and do it i got a great deal

00:23:27.760 for you guys go to bluetooth.com get your first order free when you use the promo code logan

00:23:30.920 just pay five dollars shipping bluetooth.com bluetooth.com promo code logan so anyways

00:23:36.120 well i don't know where to go now just because my my normal intuition would be to ask you about 0.99

00:23:42.440 the fact that you now had a monstrous veiny penis that was numbed out and ready to destroy 1.00

00:23:51.360 narnia okay like you could take down global warming with this fuck you could take down 1.00

00:23:56.580 student debt with this fucking thing because guess what it's fucking rock hard blue chewed out 1.00

00:24:02.280 and ready to fucking annihilate sure sure you're you're right but we weren't there yet so now we 1.00

00:24:08.160 have to pass the time so i'm like fuck it look to my left there's a joint next to my bed i'm like 0.99

00:24:13.660 hey do you mind if i smoke i asked her for permission to smoke in my room she's like no 0.98

00:24:17.600 why are you asking me

00:24:18.300 I was like I don't know

00:24:18.960 like respect

00:24:19.780 like I'm polite

00:24:20.800 whatever

00:24:21.060 she's like no

00:24:21.900 I was like bet

00:24:22.520 so I just pulled back bro

00:24:24.640 I light this joint

00:24:26.240 and I start smoking bro

00:24:27.940 next thing you know 1.00

00:24:28.680 I'm high as fuck 0.99

00:24:29.460 alright 0.99

00:24:29.980 nice

00:24:30.520 and I'm laughing

00:24:31.360 laughing the whole time

00:24:32.900 yo 1.00

00:24:33.160 I'm high as fuck 0.99

00:24:34.620 I got a ballistic missile 1.00

00:24:36.200 as a penis 1.00

00:24:36.860 that I can't feel 1.00

00:24:38.300 I can't feel it

00:24:41.420 it's

00:24:41.780 it's numb

00:24:42.900 just a javelin

00:24:43.960 in your pants

00:24:44.400 and I'm like

00:24:45.160 okay now what dude 1.00

00:24:46.440 she goes

00:24:47.540 I'm sitting there and I'm laughing at myself 0.95

00:24:49.860 I'm like this is ridiculous 0.95

00:24:51.020 and I was like I still am not horny 0.94

00:24:53.380 I happen to be hard but I don't want to do this 1.00

00:24:55.720 and she's like you're literally the worst fucking booty call ever 1.00

00:24:58.520 I'm gonna call someone else 1.00

00:25:00.240 yo I go

00:25:01.480 I know this girl bro

00:25:03.480 she's kind of 1.00

00:25:05.960 a prude like she doesn't put out 1.00

00:25:07.960 she ain't fucking every dude in LA 1.00

00:25:09.580 she has like a rotation of three the other two are out of town 1.00

00:25:11.740 so I'm high and she goes I'm gonna call someone else 1.00

00:25:14.140 I go bitch you won't do shit 1.00

00:25:16.680 I'm the best you got 1.00

00:25:18.860 because I know

00:25:22.120 she's not gonna

00:25:22.720 she's not gonna call anyone else

00:25:23.740 and

00:25:24.540 so I just laughed at her

00:25:26.620 and

00:25:27.040 she gave you a little more time

00:25:28.580 or what

00:25:29.000 no I mean

00:25:29.700 we made it work

00:25:30.620 and by the way

00:25:31.180 it was phenomenal

00:25:31.820 yeah you showed up

00:25:32.620 she told me this morning

00:25:34.300 yeah that combo

00:25:35.080 that combo was gnarly

00:25:36.320 it's crazy

00:25:36.900 and by the way

00:25:37.420 it's a combo

00:25:37.980 that I am

00:25:39.080 well no I've never used the spray

00:25:40.560 usually

00:25:41.520 up until

00:25:42.580 a couple months ago

00:25:43.560 alcohol was my numbing agent

00:25:45.080 so I would be 0.99

00:25:45.740 all fucked up 0.99

00:25:46.460 Oh, you know what? 0.99

00:25:47.920 Let me say this too.

00:25:49.340 Yeah, of course. 0.99

00:25:50.020 That spray, if you spray your penis with the spray, which you do because that's what it's built to do, it has lidocaine in it. 1.00

00:25:59.660 And so if the girl somehow magically puts her mouth on your wing, can you guess what happens to her mouth? 1.00

00:26:05.340 No tooth pain. 1.00

00:26:06.560 She got a numb ass mouth, bro. 0.98

00:26:08.340 She can't feel her mouth. 0.99

00:26:09.500 It's like when you go to the dentist and they put the shots in your gums before they take your teeth out.

00:26:14.100 She couldn't feel her mouth, bro.

00:26:15.400 What if in some weird sexual...

00:26:17.720 The whole way you do it where you wait until it dries and then wash it off.

00:26:21.500 Sounds like somebody who knows speaking.

00:26:23.000 Dylan, I did that.

00:26:24.420 Wow. 1.00

00:26:24.900 She goes, wash it off.

00:26:26.400 I was like, ha, ha, ha, ha.

00:26:28.060 No.

00:26:29.040 She made me. 1.00

00:26:29.940 She made me.

00:26:30.620 And it was still numb, bro.

00:26:31.440 That lidocaine is no joke.

00:26:32.560 You know, it's funny.

00:26:33.160 Even with her mouth numb, she still didn't shut up.

00:26:37.640 Nice.

00:26:38.020 A little chauvinistic, Mac.

00:26:39.420 A little chauvinistic.

00:26:40.380 Mac, it's weird. 1.00

00:26:41.040 We invite you to the show and you bring this fucking male toxicity. 1.00

00:26:44.060 Let us go back to talking about fucking faces 1.00

00:26:46.880 Shut up 1.00

00:26:47.280 I'm literally doing anything I can to get us out of the dick sand 0.99

00:26:49.820 It ain't gonna happen 0.85

00:26:50.780 Imagine some weird deviant 1.00

00:26:52.780 Imagine some weird deviant sexual future 1.00

00:26:55.320 At some like sexed out dentist office 0.99

00:26:57.820 They use 0.99

00:26:58.800 Light up penises 1.00

00:27:01.460 And you go in there and a girl gives you 1.00

00:27:03.900 Head to numb their 0.99

00:27:05.040 It's bad where we are now

00:27:07.660 We need so badly

00:27:09.280 You can't even say that 0.99

00:27:11.320 It's a blowjob pun 1.00

00:27:13.360 dude don't be a dick ah true you're doing it more it's cool well do you want like i'm not just 1.00

00:27:17.740 gonna come and go at your command ah it's mike no i think it's funny i think it's funny i do 0.99

00:27:24.180 we really need a girl for this show though we're about to have one are we oh do we have a meeting

00:27:29.020 with one tomorrow morning oh great okay so maybe the girl can help with this because like i'll feel

00:27:32.800 weird talking about uh genitals in front of her will you stop i will yeah i have trouble i try to 1.00

00:27:38.000 ease off in front of women 0.92

00:27:40.220 about the general talk. Really? 1.00

00:27:42.320 It's probably good to have someone that won't

00:27:44.040 high-five you after a story like that.

00:27:46.160 But it's also perspective and different point of view.

00:27:48.700 Oh, yeah. Yeah, perspective.

00:27:50.040 Hey, Mike asked a question

00:27:52.000 about this the other day. He came down

00:27:54.160 the stairs and he said, I gotta say something. Why are

00:27:56.020 people so mean?

00:27:57.940 Why are people so mean?

00:28:00.260 It's 2020, and people

00:28:01.940 are getting meaner, right?

00:28:04.000 My knee-jerk reaction

00:28:05.660 was empathetic ignorance i think i i always flash back to a time when i was 13 or 14 years old

00:28:15.340 and i was like doing youtube so i knew what a hater was i experienced it a little bit i was

00:28:20.280 in the youtube community i watched their videos i saw what the mean things that the haters left

00:28:24.100 on like uh the shake carls of the world or the ray william johnson and you know they get hated

00:28:29.260 on and i remember someone made a video that i didn't like and i typed my mean comment i typed

00:28:34.140 it out and i looked at it before i pressed enter i was like whoa like i went black for a second i

00:28:39.280 was like why would why did i do that what about me putting this person down in in a very mean way

00:28:46.760 uh strikes me as uh worthy or something to do and so empathetic ignorance i think people don't

00:28:55.940 consider that their words and their actions really can affect another human being because they don't

00:29:01.620 care it's ignorance right like you're online and you're there's a phone in between you this is the

00:29:07.220 only thing separating you and the creator there's the the person uh that goes to your school whoever

00:29:11.820 it is and people don't think that by typing something mean on a phone it can really affect

00:29:18.000 someone's mental and then danny suggested um it's a way to get people to feel better about themselves

00:29:27.480 why yeah why they do it like what's the catalyst is to make them feel better the by the way i told

00:29:31.980 i think i told you this the reason i came down with that mentality is because a um a i guess

00:29:37.700 you call her an actress someone from from that show um love island love island yes killed committed

00:29:43.820 suicide right right and and and i saw a post from our friends at the bread batch on instagram and 0.99

00:29:51.540 the comments of the post were who cares fucker who gives a shit i didn't ask like just just um 0.98

00:29:58.900 just some really really just like disgusting stuff and and i i know when i talked to you about 0.99

00:30:03.540 it and and you brought up the empathetic ignorance and not um being able to put yourself in the

00:30:09.240 person's shoes that made sense but i then took it back a step even further like what is the true

00:30:14.040 catalyst and i know danny said it it makes them feel better about about themselves but

00:30:18.500 it's just it there was never a time in my life and i think it just says a lot about now i was

00:30:25.180 doing other bad things that hurt myself i hurt myself very badly but there was never a time in

00:30:30.540 my life where i wanted to go out of my way to make someone else's life not as worthwhile

00:30:35.060 that's what sets you apart though but and i and i think it is and i and i always look back to 0.72

00:30:40.580 my my very traumatic past or the days when i my darkest days where i was fucking myself into the 0.52

00:30:46.500 ground and ask myself what was it that pulled me out and a lot of times it was my thoughts on how 0.62

00:30:54.640 my family would feel or how someone else would feel so to your point it is it is very much about

00:31:00.980 your ability to connect with the greater human yes race i was gonna say that you're very it's

00:31:06.020 very true that's a very that's a very astute statement from you because honestly like i think

00:31:10.560 a lot of these people have been raised or have or are programmed incorrectly that they feel

00:31:17.720 some sort of desire to hurt other people's feelings there is not a day go that goes by

00:31:23.600 in my life and maybe it's because i'm 35 and maybe the internet wasn't around when i was 16 who knows

00:31:27.540 but there's not a day that goes by in my life where i want to leave a comment that puts someone

00:31:31.800 down never i've never ever ever done it before i i'll make jabs at friends of course stuff like

00:31:38.940 that but if someone dies we've talked about this with the guy with the kobe thing or if someone's

00:31:43.260 having a tough time with mental illness or whatever seeing that stuff it really really

00:31:48.760 really pains me and i and i just wrapping up the the last page of my book that i just wrote the 0.69

00:31:55.080 last thing i wrote was the one thing i would urge people to do is be fucking good to each other 0.81

00:32:01.400 find a way to brighten other people's lives in some fucking way i don't care what it is hug a 0.93

00:32:07.180 hug a stranger talk to someone who's lonely help someone but at the very least stop being mean to 0.97

00:32:14.040 people stop making yourself feel better and making up for what lacks in your life by putting someone

00:32:20.440 else down it's just it's just not it's not cool it's kind of gross the rock said this he's he's

00:32:26.420 he's said it for a while now he said uh it's nice to be important but it's important to be nice

00:32:31.060 and and you know it's it's the rock it's one of the biggest celebrities in the world and he's

00:32:34.920 even moving with that attitude our conversation evolved um into and what i was going to say was

00:32:40.240 even even during your darkest days like innately you are you're a smart human you're not just smart

00:32:46.640 because like you worked hard like i believe intelligence is like a genetic trait and you

00:32:51.580 were you were even again at your darkest days operating at a higher conscious level than most

00:32:56.240 people where you realize like i don't have to put other people down to make me feel better about 0.98

00:33:00.100 myself and then our conversation evolved i asked are mean people stupid was that what it was i was 0.99

00:33:07.240 just no i was gonna say like the idea of talking shit right so so so so being a hater saying 0.99

00:33:11.720 something mean and then talking shit you will never find a successful person an elevated person 0.99

00:33:17.580 very conscious person talking shit no it did they don't do it and the opposite yeah they're 1.00

00:33:22.740 building people up they don't they don't they don't waste time speaking negatively about other 0.99

00:33:28.280 people and and we're we're surrounded by these people and even like we still fall in unfortunately

00:33:34.260 the trap of like doing it sometimes i did it we did i i personally speak for myself and say i did

00:33:38.420 it with the with the girl with the bj scandal and i think there's a lot of people watching this by

00:33:44.300 the way i caught a little bit of heat for that not not much but um there's people that are watching

00:33:49.400 this that don't know that that girl had texted me after the fact and said hey listen all this is 0.98

00:33:53.320 fair play it's doing exactly what i want it to do you keep talking shit please keep doing it like 0.56

00:33:58.100 she's asking me i have the text messages to prove it but it wasn't on her to tell me that was okay 0.96

00:34:04.120 and that was me falling back and falling into something that is not me and i and i'm not gonna

00:34:11.240 apologize for it i think i got a little bit out of hand and i and i i roasted a little hard but

00:34:15.520 i don't want the people watching the show to think that is indicative of the person who i am

00:34:20.060 or to think that it's okay to go and and and talk shit about people it's just 0.84

00:34:24.480 it's a it's a very juvenile very junior varsity thing to do it's it's it's just it doesn't do 0.84

00:34:33.740 anything for you the biggest note that i made that a lot of people have been sticking to is

00:34:37.740 there's nobody out there who's winning in any major way like i made a tweet that said i don't 0.88

00:34:43.020 think that anyone that talks shit online gets any ass i i don't i don't think that like i don't see 0.99

00:34:48.740 some dude that has either a girlfriend or that gets any play yeah talking shit online yeah i get 0.99

00:34:54.620 it i get it it's not my rebuttal yeah to that would be like uh and i said this when we were 0.95

00:35:01.700 talking i think it's human nature to judge or to assess and conclude like when you hear hear people

00:35:06.860 saying like i'll stop judging me like it it's that is that is a term high schoolers use humans by

00:35:13.500 nature assess and conclude and if you want to call it judging whatever no it's you you see something

00:35:18.440 you take in information and then you come to the logical conclusion of how to act or what to do

00:35:22.180 next so although yes i i want to be as elevated as humanly possible i also think it's unrealistic 0.99

00:35:30.340 to not assess and conclude that some people are fucking morons and if i if i like talk shit which 0.93

00:35:36.380 by the way i will in the future i'm not going to stop i'm just saying like if you can try to check 1.00

00:35:40.860 yourself before you talk shit like sometimes something comes from the heart sometimes you 0.97

00:35:44.340 feel a certain way you want to be vocal about it but um there's always a way to give good 0.99

00:35:49.000 constructive criticism without being a hater like if you truly don't like something you can express

00:35:53.700 your disinterest a different way you can you can be constructive you can offer what your perspective

00:36:00.380 was on what you saw or i agree just you viewed you know it could be anything you're right apply

00:36:06.480 some sort of positivity to the negative view that you had of the content you consumed facts 0.99

00:36:12.620 but sometimes bro i want to call the bitch a bitch yeah and like when you said it you're like 0.98

00:36:17.300 yo i don't know if i'll ever reach a level where like i'm and by the way i i agree like i ideally 0.99

00:36:21.940 yes dude i am the perfect human who's who's who's never saying anything mean about anyone but 0.99

00:36:26.780 yo if a bitch is a bitch i'm gonna call him a bitch that's that's the that's the thing that's 0.99

00:36:31.420 important here people that's that's the thing that's important here and i'll tell you why 1.00

00:36:35.700 the shit that we talked or that i i'll continue to speak for myself the shit that i talked on 0.95

00:36:40.680 that episode i talked in the face of a toxic situation where where i was wronged i was wronged 1.00

00:36:47.240 and and by the way someone that i care about was wronged even worse the only time you will ever see 0.66

00:36:52.360 me caught up in shit talking is when i am when there's a catalyst that affects me the the the 0.90

00:36:58.560 even then i wish i didn't do it i wish i didn't feed into it i wish i elevated above it like uh 0.99

00:37:03.440 like a um jeff bezos no mac bilsky no the the fucking david the german videographer 0.98

00:37:10.240 I'm going to be honest 0.99

00:37:11.500 I'm just saying names

00:37:12.260 the British dude 0.99

00:37:12.960 with the talking

00:37:13.680 nice stuff

00:37:14.880 what's that now?

00:37:16.300 Russell Brand

00:37:16.800 thank you

00:37:17.300 Russell Brand

00:37:18.100 elevated

00:37:18.760 probably would 0.99

00:37:19.720 if you slapped his mom 1.00

00:37:20.660 in the face 0.99

00:37:20.940 he'd probably be

00:37:21.480 alright that wasn't

00:37:22.580 very nice

00:37:23.040 and I see you're

00:37:23.580 feeling very angry

00:37:24.280 but we can help you

00:37:24.900 with that

00:37:25.180 like I aspire to be that

00:37:26.700 I'll never be that either

00:37:27.740 I wish

00:37:28.460 I honestly do wish

00:37:29.760 I want to move on

00:37:30.700 but I wish we would

00:37:31.280 ask Russell Brand

00:37:32.120 who's like

00:37:32.620 I consider the most

00:37:33.340 woke man I know

00:37:34.040 what he would do

00:37:34.940 if someone slapped 0.99

00:37:35.500 his mom in the face

00:37:36.320 we know what 0.97

00:37:37.580 Dan Pena would do

00:37:38.720 we know what

00:37:39.100 Dan Pena would do 0.95

00:37:39.740 Bite his nose off. 1.00

00:37:40.400 Bite his fucking nose off. 1.00

00:37:42.000 Here we are. 1.00

00:37:42.500 We're on a podcast.

00:37:47.040 We are?

00:37:48.000 It's 6 p.m.

00:37:48.980 Yeah, no, Jeff Bezos committed $10 billion.

00:37:52.160 Finally!

00:37:52.980 God dang it.

00:37:53.820 $10 billion to fight climate change.

00:37:56.320 Yes, Jeff!

00:37:57.400 That is a lot of money.

00:37:58.480 That is a lot of money.

00:38:01.020 Do you think it's like cash going directly to the icebergs?

00:38:04.880 Oh, yeah.

00:38:05.400 I don't know.

00:38:06.120 What do you think?

00:38:06.620 Like rebuild the icebergs with cash?

00:38:08.120 Maybe I should have read about this.

00:38:09.340 an earth fund he called it it's the earth fund i'm thrilled to announce i'm launching the bezos

00:38:13.900 earth fund climate change is the biggest threat to our planet i want to work alongside others both

00:38:18.300 to amplify known ways and to explore new ways of fighting and devastating impact of climate change

00:38:22.840 on this planet we all share the global initiative will fund scientists activists ngos any effort

00:38:27.480 that offers a real possibility to help preserve and protect the natural world we can save earth

00:38:31.920 it's going to take act collective action from big companies small companies nation states global

00:38:36.580 organizations and individuals jeff bezos stepping up to the plate it's cool to see a billionaire

00:38:41.080 act on something um you know these new billionaires are dope like elon like we're gonna build rockets

00:38:47.520 go to mars jeff bezos same thing saving the earth old billionaires were like i need more oil more

00:38:52.580 money where's the train you know i need more cars like when uh when notre dame burned down

00:38:58.200 yeah and like the next day oh yeah like a couple billionaires of millions of dollars pledged a

00:39:03.360 billion dollars to help fix it yeah and then uh when the forest was burning in brazil like

00:39:07.840 no one stepped out this is it's really cool to see a billionaire apply their uh their wealth

00:39:13.060 towards keeping our planet and also a lot of wealth not just like here's 100 million he's

00:39:18.580 like a lot that's a lot here's here's one i'm gonna look at tenth of what i have oh you know

00:39:23.720 what though he so he's worth 129.9 billion so so probably roughly like seven eight percent of his

00:39:30.580 of his net worth

00:39:32.100 which is awesome

00:39:32.640 but it's a pledge

00:39:33.660 so it's not a donation

00:39:34.740 right now

00:39:35.200 it could take him

00:39:36.500 to the end of his life

00:39:37.280 or even further

00:39:38.660 well did he put

00:39:39.240 a timeline on it

00:39:40.180 some pledges

00:39:41.360 could be like

00:39:41.880 over the next five years

00:39:43.000 I don't think that's

00:39:43.800 I don't think that's the issue

00:39:44.660 if the dude's gonna give

00:39:45.540 10 million dollars

00:39:46.600 to protect the earth

00:39:47.300 billion billion

00:39:47.920 yeah

00:39:48.280 he spent a good amount

00:39:51.620 of money at Liv too

00:39:54.120 during the Super Bowl

00:39:55.040 you told me

00:39:56.000 how crazy is that

00:39:57.320 he goes

00:39:58.760 they're cool

00:39:59.300 billionaires are cool

00:40:00.120 Mike goes, yo, you won't believe who I saw at Liv last night.

00:40:03.220 I go, the fact that you just said that sentence to me, I'm so disinterested.

00:40:06.400 Don't even tell me.

00:40:07.320 He goes, no, I got it.

00:40:08.240 This was like one of the one times where it was acceptable to say it. 0.99

00:40:12.280 Jeff fucking Bezos had a table at fucking Liv nightclub, bro. 0.99

00:40:16.440 Because he's single now, yeah? 0.99

00:40:17.860 Or does he have, he's got the side chick is now his girlfriend, yeah? 0.98

00:40:22.660 Damn, how do you, imagine Jeff Bezos takes interest in your, like, it's over. 0.99

00:40:27.660 There's no coming back from that. 1.00

00:40:29.840 So she was the wife 0.70

00:40:30.700 of like the biggest agent

00:40:31.700 in LA,

00:40:32.340 Patrick White.

00:40:32.880 Oh.

00:40:33.740 Yeah,

00:40:33.940 but I mean,

00:40:34.260 at the end of the day,

00:40:34.820 like who,

00:40:35.220 Patrick,

00:40:35.720 I mean like.

00:40:36.400 But it just showed you like 0.99

00:40:37.420 how power and shit 1.00

00:40:39.020 that like a hotshot agent 1.00

00:40:40.820 compared to Jeff Bezos.

00:40:42.740 Dude,

00:40:42.900 he's got a hundred billion dollars.

00:40:43.920 What's Jeff Bezos' 1.00

00:40:44.560 ex-wife doing?

00:40:45.240 Because I am single.

00:40:46.300 What? 1.00

00:40:46.640 What is she doing? 0.99

00:40:47.840 Do you want to know 1.00

00:40:48.160 what she's doing? 1.00

00:40:48.860 She's counting money 1.00

00:40:49.960 and she's going to be 0.75

00:40:50.740 counting money 1.00

00:40:51.140 for the rest of her days

00:40:51.860 on this planet.

00:40:52.460 Something tells me 1.00

00:40:52.680 she doesn't give a fuck. 0.99

00:40:53.840 You know what the settlement was, 0.99

00:40:55.280 right?

00:40:55.640 How much?

00:40:56.180 Half. 0.98

00:40:56.500 half half what of his money shut the fuck yeah half of amazon half of his stake and i don't think 0.97

00:41:02.680 sorry let me pull it up we gotta be careful no but she got a lot i don't know i don't know if 0.97

00:41:07.400 it's too much because she was with him she's a real day one bro and so like how much of his

00:41:12.840 success can he contribute to her sorry there's probably a hefty chunk yeah like she kept him

00:41:18.440 mentally stable she motivated him she told him he could do it when he was just in his little office

00:41:23.880 with Amazon in the sign behind him

00:41:25.800 like she got

00:41:27.460 so

00:41:27.860 20 million Amazon shares

00:41:31.620 worth an estimated 38 billion dollars

00:41:33.760 what's her name? 0.94

00:41:36.020 what's her name? McKenzie? 1.00

00:41:37.740 McKenzie Bezos

00:41:38.780 she was with him from the beginning

00:41:40.680 yo McKenzie be in my vlog 0.64

00:41:43.760 automatically made her 1.00

00:41:45.600 the third 1.00

00:41:46.120 richest woman on earth 1.00

00:41:49.280 Dylan just held up a sign that said 1.00

00:41:51.320 happiest moment in your life

00:41:52.960 this one right now question mark could i could i just say 25 of the uh of the amazon stock that

00:42:02.320 they that they co-owned so they owned say they owned 100 share she got a quarter of it so i said

00:42:06.740 a half excuse me happiest moment of your life let's go around the room do you have a happiest

00:42:12.200 moment i try to i try to when i'm like feeling extreme elation i try to clock and be like yo

00:42:18.640 i call them life moments like this is a life moment when it's something like um uh not not

00:42:25.560 not that not the happiest but like one of many that i thought was like a life moment that was

00:42:30.480 super cool was when uh i was on an episode of jake's disney show um was aardvark yeah yeah

00:42:38.020 like acting alongside my brother in his disney disney channel show coming from ohio like two

00:42:46.700 kids who like technically on paper were gonna amount to be nothing right like like i don't know

00:42:53.500 maybe like i don't i don't know like i don't know what life had planned for us um and then just

00:43:00.560 that was a moment when i look what i was just thinking about my happiest moment go ahead

00:43:05.760 i don't know that was just a really cool moment where i was like oh my god this is very very real

00:43:11.280 now that was cool wait we got one i have i have two uh one was when i had my first child

00:43:18.020 okay that hasn't happened yet but i think that's gonna be pretty exciting yeah yeah you're out of 0.82

00:43:23.380 your fucking mind yeah yeah and then the second one we were at the ranch just recently really i 0.97

00:43:28.700 felt it was weird i was standing out in this field looking at this mountain cauldron and 0.99

00:43:33.920 just like a perfect feeling washed over me where i felt like my my body felt perfect i was in a

00:43:40.640 perfect mental state i was peaceful i was with my friends i was doing the things that i love to do

00:43:46.460 and it's like when all of those factors combine you know external environment plus internal

00:43:51.920 happiness it was like wow i feel i felt perfect yeah i think i told you i walked up i was like i

00:43:58.160 feel perfect right now and it was just a you know it was it was simple but it was like that

00:44:03.540 kind of simplicity is what i've always wanted for my life and it felt so great

00:44:06.980 i would say i would say mine is probably the external one was probably seeing my little

00:44:13.120 sister get married just because it was um i missed her i missed my little sister's graduation

00:44:20.080 from college because i was an addict and um it was it's a it's a moment that i'll i'll never get

00:44:27.560 back i didn't i didn't see her graduate college and it's a big regret of mine uh and so to be

00:44:34.620 able to see her to be able to be clean uh and to give the this best man speech or actually i gave

00:44:41.480 the speech for her side so the bridesmaid speech which is kind of actually weird now that i think

00:44:45.520 of it uh but to see her walk down the aisle see my mom crying my dad crying um and to and to be

00:44:53.200 there for that was awesome and then and then on the external side wait wait yeah and not to be 0.96

00:44:57.040 that guy but yeah sure um was that the happiest moment of your life before or after you shit your

00:45:03.160 pants at her wedding how crazy is that that the that potentially the greatest moment of my life

00:45:10.320 and the most mike we know you're on a roller coaster that's what it is in reality that's 0.94

00:45:15.340 crazy uh it was before before that's that's wild to imagine that i still that i shit my pants at

00:45:22.580 that wedding no no no i was completely sober i ate a bad cubano sandwich at a gas station in 0.59

00:45:29.700 washington dc that's your own fault imagine turning the rented tuxedo returning the rented

00:45:34.980 tuxedo back to men's warehouse no you don't when i think i'm banned we thought we thought he was

00:45:39.000 banned we had to go to get suits for the impulsive uh uh at jake's wedding and we were surprised when

00:45:44.500 they let mike back in it was it was a shitty situation i literally that was that was that

00:45:49.820 was that was probably my that was probably my highest and lowest moment in my life and then 0.94

00:45:54.580 And then on the external side, or for me personally, to Max's point, like you have the ranch and shit, it's funny because they kind of compete.

00:46:01.820 But whenever I'm in the water, dude, and obviously this goes back to the lazy river thing so much, but I've had times recently in my current life where I've been in the middle of the Pacific, looking at the palm trees by myself, offshore a little bit, just floating around, where I am able to calm my racing mind and drop some of my anxiety and actually feel happy.

00:46:24.460 about life that's right and so i and so that would probably be somewhere on the coast of california

00:46:30.120 and you know soaking up the california sun and just taking it all in just knowing that i made

00:46:34.340 it out of hell and you know i'm in a pretty good place in my life now yeah things have been really

00:46:38.700 good lately yeah it feels really nice yeah it's it's uh it's very cool yeah like hopefully hopefully

00:46:44.640 you guys watching this can feel some of our energy and apply it to your life like that's a that's the

00:46:48.320 number one thing throughout all my content is i want to uh even if it's just a little bit be

00:46:52.740 inspirational and motivationally in the slightest

00:46:54.900 degree and if I can be a role model

00:46:56.980 or beacon of light, hope, optimism

00:46:58.880 whatever it is that then I am winning

00:47:00.940 then I become happy

00:47:03.140 alright I think that's it

00:47:04.940 will that

00:47:07.040 Uber story

00:47:07.920 escape us if we hold it for another point

00:47:10.880 yeah it will

00:47:11.780 when the time is right

00:47:13.560 we'll save it

00:47:14.800 we'll talk about you playing the game 0.99

00:47:16.500 Mike is a sick and twisted 0.98

00:47:19.900 yeah we'll talk about it another time 0.99

00:47:21.420 We've been on set for a while.

00:47:23.140 Hit that subscribe button. We're about to hit two millions.

00:47:25.320 God damn it. We love you guys. Thanks for listening 0.99

00:47:27.460 to Apollosive. Take it easy.

00:47:30.460 Lisa, tell them

00:47:31.540 about our new show. We have a new

00:47:33.640 podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me.

00:47:35.780 I'm Lexi Iwanu. We're two best

00:47:37.600 friends, 22 years apart, but

00:47:39.560 so close at heart. And I'm

00:47:41.420 Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which

00:47:43.460 means we have wildly different references,

00:47:45.500 occasionally different opinions, and at this point

00:47:47.480 in my 50s, I've lived it all.

00:47:49.340 now in my 30s being the founder of new shoes good taste is my business listen on the iheart

00:47:55.840 radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts i'm hamza and i'm martin and we're the

00:48:03.580 hosts of out of character the funniest podcast in the entire world i like that it's a good way

00:48:11.580 to promote ourselves we are two funny guys having fun enjoying ourselves and we just know how to

00:48:16.580 have fun unlike anyone else if you guys like fun conversations hot takes what else not too hot

00:48:23.220 just kind of lukewarm lukewarm takes to get your mind thinking a little bit listen out of character

00:48:27.480 on the iHeartRadio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts hi this is kylie breakman

00:48:33.320 angela geritana jeremy colhane patrick mcdonald and we're the hosts of the artists on artists on

00:48:38.240 artists on artists podcast the improvised character comedy podcast where each week a new panel of

00:48:43.460 Artists discuss their craft.

00:48:45.660 Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

00:48:48.740 And we do a little Halloween sometimes.

00:48:50.960 Does the Pope dress up?

00:48:52.280 He winks on Halloween.

00:48:54.560 He gets right up next to the microphone.

00:48:56.280 I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other.

00:48:59.380 You've never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween.

00:49:04.400 Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:49:12.220 I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess podcast.

00:49:17.860 The true crime comedy podcast, all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it.

00:49:22.260 Each week I bring on an amazing guest.

00:49:24.140 Ooh, I scammed them.

00:49:25.320 What?

00:49:25.800 I could talk to you for an hour.

00:49:27.320 You're a generational yapper, like me.

00:49:29.340 That's why I had to make yapping a job.

00:49:31.100 And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube.

00:49:34.600 Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:49:40.480 Scam Goddess!

00:49:41.760 Peace. 0.76

Impaulsive with Logan Paul - February 27, 2020

E162 Logan Paul is a BAD Booty Call - IMPAULSIVE EP. 162

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