JustPearlyThings - July 03, 2023


Ex Playboy REVEALS Why He Is Monogamous

Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
Mentioned
Alpha King Kingsdale Pearl
Heated Debate Between PRO-LIFE And PRO CHOICE Pearl Gave Her A Reality Check

Episode Stats


Length

9 minutes

Words per minute

167.0

Word count

1,654

Sentence count

124

Harmful content

Misogyny

10

sentences flagged

Toxicity

35

sentences flagged

Hate speech

8

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, I sit down with a good friend of mine to talk about what it means to be a traditional man and how he became one. We talk about cheating, being monogamish, and why men cheat on their wives.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 I think when you're in your early 20s, that's just, you're raging, you know?
00:00:04.980 Like me, in my 20s, working five nights a week, throwing parties,
00:00:10.060 it was impossible for me to settle down until my late 30s.
00:00:14.100 So when I see young men talk about going out, being with women, I get it.
00:00:18.260 Do I think it's degenerate? 0.96
00:00:20.180 Yeah, but I'd be a hypocrite if I attacked them for sleeping around 0.98
00:00:25.480 with a bunch of women and not being in a relationship. 0.80
00:00:30.000 I've become a traditional man because...
00:00:32.960 You became a traditional man.
00:00:34.540 Yeah, I'm 42 years old.
00:00:35.940 Okay.
00:00:37.320 I do believe in a monogamous relationship.
00:00:39.820 I am against adultery.
00:00:41.300 I never make jokes about adultery or that I'm a homosexual.
00:00:45.320 I think I would never make a joke that I'm a homosexual or that I cheat on my wife
00:00:50.400 because my daughter one day will get older,
00:00:54.280 and I don't want my daughter to ever say to me,
00:00:57.120 why did you cheat on mom? 0.99
00:01:00.000 You know, my daughter is the most precious thing to me in my life, you know?
00:01:04.120 And my relationship with my wife is the most important relationship in my life.
00:01:09.140 I put her front and center.
00:01:11.480 But my wife is traditional, you know?
00:01:14.340 She's a teacher by training.
00:01:15.580 She's a college graduate.
00:01:16.860 She's a teacher by training.
00:01:17.760 Her mother is traditional.
00:01:19.060 Her grandma, in German, they call it Oma, she was traditional.
00:01:23.040 Her sister is traditional.
00:01:24.100 Where I live in Germany, where I have a home, it's traditional women. 1.00
00:01:29.640 And these are women that are great at keeping the home organized, cleanliness, preparing meals, 1.00
00:01:38.900 and they're happy this way.
00:01:41.620 This is what's crazy to people in the United States, maybe.
00:01:45.680 If you live in a small city, and by the way, my wife is not from New York.
00:01:51.080 I didn't meet her in a New York nightclub.
00:01:52.920 She's from a small city.
00:01:53.980 And even within a small city, in the most rural part of that small city, we got cows,
00:02:00.120 horses, and pigs in my neighborhood in Germany, where I have my home.
00:02:02.880 So over there, the women, it's almost a cultural norm in that part of Germany to be married, 0.99
00:02:12.020 have one man, they're cooking, cleaning, and it's not outrageous to say it.
00:02:19.620 They actually want to do it, and they take pride in it.
00:02:24.080 But the man works.
00:02:26.500 He takes care of it.
00:02:27.780 And for my wife, her mom, her grandma, her older sister, her cousins, her aunt,
00:02:35.800 she has so many examples.
00:02:37.520 And that's actually a pretty well-balanced lifestyle.
00:02:40.760 Yeah, well, and what I realized is we have a whole generation, especially in the West,
00:02:45.320 a whole generation of people that don't know how to be wives, or husbands, honestly, for that matter.
00:02:51.440 And I realized it's because women lead most relationships. 1.00
00:02:55.380 So most people, if they've seen their parents are together, the mom probably led the relationship,
00:03:02.960 not the man, because of, I think, the way that the contract,
00:03:05.960 I think it's because of the way marriage is, like the contract is in the U.S.,
00:03:10.620 where women are basically rewarded for leaving. 1.00
00:03:13.280 So the guy's always going to be trying to make the girl happy.
00:03:15.800 And we have a whole generation of women that have worked. 0.99
00:03:18.160 So, like, how are you going to have traditional skills if you're working?
00:03:23.160 And then, I mean, I didn't even scratch with, like, single mother homes, right?
00:03:28.960 So it's like, how would women, how would we know how to be wives and mothers if we've never seen it?
00:03:36.500 It's interesting.
00:03:37.360 You really, wow.
00:03:38.540 Wow, you know what?
00:03:43.240 It's interesting you say this about single mothers, because I had, for a while, I lived with my mother and my parents split.
00:03:50.540 And I think one reason a lot of men sleep around with women, and this is something that's not really talked about, you know, a lot,
00:04:00.420 is that maybe men also have issues with their mother, the way some women have issues, you know, with their father.
00:04:08.240 Oh, yeah.
00:04:09.120 You know?
00:04:09.500 Oh, yeah.
00:04:10.120 You know, like, there was a, you know, a lot of men, you know, you know, yeah, so a lot of people look at me, 0.99
00:04:18.060 and they assume that, you know, I got a lot of pussy in my past, and they would be right. 1.00
00:04:25.720 Okay. 0.99
00:04:26.120 So, my friend once said to me, Alphanema, how would you, how would your mother feel if she knew how awfully you treat women? 0.98
00:04:36.660 And I said to him, I looked at him, and I said, I don't give a shit what she thinks about me. 0.99
00:04:45.640 Because that woman, it felt like she never really gave a fuck about me. 1.00
00:04:50.240 And, you know, the one thing she was good for was the milk in her titties. 1.00
00:05:03.940 And that's actually Alpha King rule number 88. 0.60
00:05:07.440 If you want to build strong men when they grow up who treat their women like queens,
00:05:13.160 set a good, loving example for them when they're young.
00:05:21.980 Well, and the other thing is, because a lot of times women will complain about the way men treat them,
00:05:26.960 but it's like traditional women don't typically have a problem getting traditional men.
00:05:32.120 You know, the thing is that, you said to me why I became traditional.
00:05:41.120 What?
00:05:41.560 You said to me earlier, I became traditional.
00:05:43.740 You're right.
00:05:44.220 I became traditional.
00:05:45.660 Okay.
00:05:46.440 You're right.
00:05:47.160 I became traditional.
00:05:48.240 Yeah, I think it's, you can learn it.
00:05:50.440 Yeah.
00:05:50.600 But one reason I wasn't traditional was because when I was working in the nightclubs,
00:05:57.520 bringing out all these women, it wasn't until after I became traditional that I realized,
00:06:01.960 perhaps it was a sex addiction, that I was sleeping around with so many women.
00:06:06.500 And it wasn't until my 40s that I start confronting the fact that, hey, maybe in my 20s and 30s,
00:06:14.100 I didn't get that love from my mother. 0.96
00:06:15.840 You know, and, and, and then I was fucking a lot of women, but there was something missing. 1.00
00:06:24.720 You know, maybe that's why I spent so much time in New York City nightclubs. 0.99
00:06:29.820 I was just fanatical about getting pussy constant, you know, and, and that's, you know, there's something dirt. 1.00
00:06:38.220 You lose it. 0.99
00:06:38.960 My friend said this to me, my friend, you know, and I'm not going to say who he is, you know,
00:06:44.300 but, but well-known guy, he said to me, he said, every, every woman, you know,
00:06:48.640 he said, every woman you sleep with, it's like, you're losing a piece of yourself. 0.99
00:06:54.460 And, and, and I thought, I thought it was towards, before I met, I got, met my wife, my late 30s.
00:07:02.220 But it was around that point where I was like, it hit me.
00:07:05.600 It was the right word at the right point in my life.
00:07:08.560 If, um, it's hard if you're a man and your mother is cold to you, that's, that's, that's 1.00
00:07:18.020 some fuck that, that's some, it hits your heart. 0.99
00:07:19.940 Now, some guys, the guys who have mothers like that and the mother loves them, but the 1.00
00:07:25.960 guys that have gone through that, I would imagine that they would understand what I'm
00:07:30.880 saying. 1.00
00:07:31.280 The same way a girl whose father ignores her, fuck, can you imagine that? 1.00
00:07:36.880 I love my daughter. 1.00
00:07:38.360 I couldn't even imagine, couldn't even imagine if I just deserted her.
00:07:43.900 How could she feel about, man? 0.98
00:07:45.920 So when I see a woman act like a whore, you know, now, I'm not talking about before. 1.00
00:07:51.400 Right. 0.99
00:07:51.840 When I was Kingsdale, when I was these other guys age, you know, no, no. 0.98
00:07:56.280 When I was young, if I saw a woman act like a whore, I might've been like, all right, cool. 1.00
00:08:02.680 Let's have fun. 1.00
00:08:03.360 Because I was also a whore. 1.00
00:08:05.280 I was also promiscuous. 1.00
00:08:06.380 But now as a father with a daughter, I think, fuck, when she was a baby, when she was a baby, 1.00
00:08:13.340 her father deserted her. 0.99
00:08:16.780 You said something to me, Pearl.
00:08:18.540 You said, I moved before.
00:08:20.480 You said, I don't mean to blow you up right now.
00:08:22.720 No, you're okay.
00:08:23.360 You're okay.
00:08:23.660 You said something to me that I understood your father without knowing your father.
00:08:28.540 You said to me, I went back to living at home with my parents.
00:08:35.760 Yeah.
00:08:36.300 Right.
00:08:37.160 And then you said your feelings, your mom's sentiment.
00:08:39.720 But then you said, my dad was so happy.
00:08:42.240 Yeah.
00:08:42.680 And I understood that because I'm already looking forward to tomorrow when I get back
00:08:47.840 to Germany, my daughter being there at the airport.
00:08:51.100 And I've only been gone a week.
00:08:52.800 But it's been all.
00:08:53.960 I miss her.
00:08:54.760 I miss my wife.
00:08:56.100 And the point I want to make is that that feeling of when you go back later next month or this
00:09:03.060 month to go back to Chicago and meet your dad, he's going to be so happy to see you.
00:09:07.480 I know that feeling because I also have a daughter.
00:09:10.820 You don't know what it feels like to be a man and have a daughter.
00:09:13.400 I do.
00:09:14.400 It's impossible for you to understand that as a man, as a father, you'll never be a man
00:09:19.680 or a father.
00:09:20.420 I am both.
00:09:21.720 He will be so happy to see you the same way I'm going to be happy when I see my daughter
00:09:25.780 tomorrow.
00:09:27.160 You know, because you imagine if you didn't have a father there tomorrow, next week, two,
00:09:31.200 three weeks from now, when you go back to the United States to pick you up, he didn't 0.98
00:09:35.260 give a shit about me. 0.91
00:09:36.120 Well, and it's also like when you're close with your dad, you like even me, I quit like 1.00
00:09:45.200 drinking a couple of years ago.
00:09:46.640 And part of it was because of my dad, because my dad doesn't drink at all.
00:09:50.660 And so it's like, I don't know.
00:09:52.160 You just kind of do things to like make your dad happy.