Ex Playboy REVEALS Why He Is Monogamous
Episode Stats
Words per minute
166.9976
Harmful content
Misogyny
10
sentences flagged
Hate speech
8
sentences flagged
Summary
In this episode, I sit down with a good friend of mine to talk about what it means to be a traditional man and how he became one. We talk about cheating, being monogamish, and why men cheat on their wives.
Transcript
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I think when you're in your early 20s, that's just, you're raging, you know?
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Like me, in my 20s, working five nights a week, throwing parties,
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it was impossible for me to settle down until my late 30s.
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So when I see young men talk about going out, being with women, I get it.
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Yeah, but I'd be a hypocrite if I attacked them for sleeping around
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with a bunch of women and not being in a relationship.
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I never make jokes about adultery or that I'm a homosexual.
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I think I would never make a joke that I'm a homosexual or that I cheat on my wife
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and I don't want my daughter to ever say to me,
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You know, my daughter is the most precious thing to me in my life, you know?
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And my relationship with my wife is the most important relationship in my life.
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Her grandma, in German, they call it Oma, she was traditional.
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Where I live in Germany, where I have a home, it's traditional women.
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And these are women that are great at keeping the home organized, cleanliness, preparing meals,
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This is what's crazy to people in the United States, maybe.
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If you live in a small city, and by the way, my wife is not from New York.
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And even within a small city, in the most rural part of that small city, we got cows,
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horses, and pigs in my neighborhood in Germany, where I have my home.
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So over there, the women, it's almost a cultural norm in that part of Germany to be married,
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have one man, they're cooking, cleaning, and it's not outrageous to say it.
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They actually want to do it, and they take pride in it.
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And for my wife, her mom, her grandma, her older sister, her cousins, her aunt,
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And that's actually a pretty well-balanced lifestyle.
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Yeah, well, and what I realized is we have a whole generation, especially in the West,
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a whole generation of people that don't know how to be wives, or husbands, honestly, for that matter.
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And I realized it's because women lead most relationships.
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So most people, if they've seen their parents are together, the mom probably led the relationship,
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not the man, because of, I think, the way that the contract,
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I think it's because of the way marriage is, like the contract is in the U.S.,
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where women are basically rewarded for leaving.
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So the guy's always going to be trying to make the girl happy.
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And we have a whole generation of women that have worked.
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So, like, how are you going to have traditional skills if you're working?
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And then, I mean, I didn't even scratch with, like, single mother homes, right?
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So it's like, how would women, how would we know how to be wives and mothers if we've never seen it?
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It's interesting you say this about single mothers, because I had, for a while, I lived with my mother and my parents split.
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And I think one reason a lot of men sleep around with women, and this is something that's not really talked about, you know, a lot,
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is that maybe men also have issues with their mother, the way some women have issues, you know, with their father.
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You know, like, there was a, you know, a lot of men, you know, you know, yeah, so a lot of people look at me,
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and they assume that, you know, I got a lot of pussy in my past, and they would be right.
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So, my friend once said to me, Alphanema, how would you, how would your mother feel if she knew how awfully you treat women?
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And I said to him, I looked at him, and I said, I don't give a shit what she thinks about me.
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Because that woman, it felt like she never really gave a fuck about me.
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And, you know, the one thing she was good for was the milk in her titties.
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If you want to build strong men when they grow up who treat their women like queens,
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set a good, loving example for them when they're young.
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Well, and the other thing is, because a lot of times women will complain about the way men treat them,
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but it's like traditional women don't typically have a problem getting traditional men.
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You know, the thing is that, you said to me why I became traditional.
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But one reason I wasn't traditional was because when I was working in the nightclubs,
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bringing out all these women, it wasn't until after I became traditional that I realized,
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perhaps it was a sex addiction, that I was sleeping around with so many women.
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And it wasn't until my 40s that I start confronting the fact that, hey, maybe in my 20s and 30s,
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You know, and, and, and then I was fucking a lot of women, but there was something missing.
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You know, maybe that's why I spent so much time in New York City nightclubs.
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I was just fanatical about getting pussy constant, you know, and, and that's, you know, there's something dirt.
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My friend said this to me, my friend, you know, and I'm not going to say who he is, you know,
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but, but well-known guy, he said to me, he said, every, every woman, you know,
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he said, every woman you sleep with, it's like, you're losing a piece of yourself.
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And, and, and I thought, I thought it was towards, before I met, I got, met my wife, my late 30s.
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But it was around that point where I was like, it hit me.
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It was the right word at the right point in my life.
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If, um, it's hard if you're a man and your mother is cold to you, that's, that's, that's
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some fuck that, that's some, it hits your heart.
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Now, some guys, the guys who have mothers like that and the mother loves them, but the
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guys that have gone through that, I would imagine that they would understand what I'm
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The same way a girl whose father ignores her, fuck, can you imagine that?
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I couldn't even imagine, couldn't even imagine if I just deserted her.
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So when I see a woman act like a whore, you know, now, I'm not talking about before.
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When I was Kingsdale, when I was these other guys age, you know, no, no.
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When I was young, if I saw a woman act like a whore, I might've been like, all right, cool.
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But now as a father with a daughter, I think, fuck, when she was a baby, when she was a baby,
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You said, I don't mean to blow you up right now.
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You said something to me that I understood your father without knowing your father.
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You said to me, I went back to living at home with my parents.
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And then you said your feelings, your mom's sentiment.
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And I understood that because I'm already looking forward to tomorrow when I get back
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to Germany, my daughter being there at the airport.
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And the point I want to make is that that feeling of when you go back later next month or this
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month to go back to Chicago and meet your dad, he's going to be so happy to see you.
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I know that feeling because I also have a daughter.
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You don't know what it feels like to be a man and have a daughter.
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It's impossible for you to understand that as a man, as a father, you'll never be a man
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He will be so happy to see you the same way I'm going to be happy when I see my daughter
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You know, because you imagine if you didn't have a father there tomorrow, next week, two,
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three weeks from now, when you go back to the United States to pick you up, he didn't
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Well, and it's also like when you're close with your dad, you like even me, I quit like
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And part of it was because of my dad, because my dad doesn't drink at all.
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You just kind of do things to like make your dad happy.