Keep Your Relationship PRIVATE
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
191.96176
Summary
In this episode, we discuss the importance of keeping your relationships private, how to keep them private, and what to do about it if you're in a public relationship. We also discuss the benefits of keeping a relationship private and how to deal with the pressures of public dating.
Transcript
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i would talk about like social including social media um so your expectations for your friend
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group and your presence on the internet what you're going to share what you're not going to
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do that no that's such a great that's such a great comment because i've actually like
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i i feel like i've been in a public relationship before and i i actually would prefer to like
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not tell people about that at all until like like i i feel like if people always ask me about like
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who i'm dating and like all this but it's just like i feel like it's just no like i just rather
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nobody know until i'm married once i'm married you can know who he is like but it's just like
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because i've and i don't know if that's it would also you know it depends on the guy too like yes
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but it's like i don't know i just i've been in a public relationship before and it caused so many
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problems because you're worried about what people say oh yeah what people think and it's just
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i i hated that it's it's not worth it there is no benefit it's just basically feeding people's
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curiosity but at the end of the day it doesn't change anything about your relationship so i would
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100 percent uh recommend that it's private especially when you have a platform like this
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because not everybody wants the best for you and they'll smile in your face but then you know look
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for ways to undermine and being in relationship can be hard enough especially when you're just starting
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and you want to have a good foundation i keep my relationship private uh and i think the happiest
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people that i know we found out when they wanted us to know and not a moment sooner what would you say
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um for girls because a lot of girls get mad their boyfriends won't post them do you think that's
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a reasonable thing to be mad about absolutely not i think he should embrace if he wants to protect
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you see that's such a that's so much better of like a mindset then because in all honesty i i used to
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get mad about that like like when i was younger me too and then it's just like i didn't realize that
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he was doing it because of the problems that like came with it later yeah and in all honesty
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like in hindsight i like realized i was wrong about that because it's like
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i don't know it's just it's i saw the problems that came with it yeah the way that men look at
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the world they operate like the enemy is always at the gate they are looking ahead at what's going
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to happen after and as women we often think about the moment right we think about oh it's going to
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feel so good to be claimed to be spoken for i want that you know i went through the same thing where
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it was kind of like ah why do we have to keep this quiet but i held it together and i'm so happy now
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especially having a public platform that you know nobody needs to know because you can ask yourself
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okay we make an we make a post we are what do they call it instagram public or facebook public
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and then what everybody that you know is going to have an opinion about it so then you're going to find
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yourself explaining over analyzing every interaction i mean you see it all the time on i mean i do it
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first i do it sometimes you know like on social media like will and jada they were the perfect couple
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and now everyone over analyzes every little thing absolutely you know just like the two ladies that
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shared their body count whether your body count is high or low i would recommend keep it very low why does
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anybody need to know that moment that little thrill that you got that i have 27 people that i've slept
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with or five people that i've slept with now that it's out there in the universe universe how is that
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helping you you know and we're talking about kevin samuels what he always used to ask what does that past
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bring the future husband that you want so there are some things you just need to take to the grave
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wow what else on here all right we talked about social media so we have social media on here but
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i would also add like friend groups oh because where do you think oh i was going to ask this earlier
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as women we need to talk about our problems more than men absolutely would you agree with that so
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when something's frustrating us i feel like sometimes men it's this is a fight that i feel like i see happen
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and it's like a very much like the sexes don't understand each other because women we want to
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talk about our problems right and men want to solve them all the time so we if we go to the men they
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get frustrated absolutely because and it because they're like well you're not asking me to solve it
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but at the same time the men don't understand well why don't you just not talk about it right and where
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where do you think women should go to talk about their problems so a couple of things you definitely need
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a group of other women that want to hear all the details if you want to share them but also want
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you to win so it's really important to have that group that's another project that i'm working on we
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can talk about later if you want to but you have to understand the way that men think and if you are
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going to talk to him i would reverse the order so if you're asking him to make a decision lead with
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that so sometimes i'll tell my guy i don't know let's say something at work happened you know i will say
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you know should i do this should i travel for this meeting or should i stay home and then all the
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reasons why i think it might be a good thing or or a bad thing sometimes as women we give all that
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detail and men are looking for how do i how do i yeah exactly i just can't think of a couple times
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right so it's exhausting for them you can even use that in the business world like even in a meeting like
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set an agenda the purpose of this meeting is or what i want to be able to do after this meeting is make a go
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no-go decision try to operate that way and just understand if a man doesn't want all of that
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it's not that he loves you any less it's just that it's a burden that he can't do anything with
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so help him help you so find some girlfriends if you must uh to talk about it but if you are going
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to talk to your man lead first and then ask him do you want the detail he may say no and be okay with that
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that's a great advice what what else on here um anything else we were missing i don't know what
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do they say i did do we put friend groups on there because i think oh yeah that's that's so true you
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know i there's this girl i follow i want to do reaction to it okay um no i didn't well i didn't
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maybe maybe i could show you actually but okay but she um i followed this girl her name's like bunny
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on tick tock and she's a big age gap right she's dating guys like 25 years older okay and i just
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saw the slow evolution of her being married and she moved to la to like pursue the social media stuff
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and then she started hanging out with some other single moms and then they started going to all these
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events and i just remember like watching in real time thinking this girl is gonna get divorced because
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she's not acting like the wife no really she's wearing these scantily clothed outfits and i'm just
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like she's she's and she i just saw a video of her crying on tick tock talking about she got divorced
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and i yeah i was thinking the friend group's important so what are you were you gonna say about
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friend groups right i think it's important to know who's going to be in your circle uh and share that with
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your spouse so you know he may ask you to cut off some male friends or some girlfriends that aren't
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really helping you be your best self um if you have expectations or you like to do i don't know girls
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trips or guys trips or you know go out all of that has to be talked about and i would say if he's not a
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fan of it you should lay it down because ultimately he's the one responsible for you wow that's the one
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what else i'm gonna milk you for all the information i see this is super this is actually super helpful
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you're bringing up a lot of stuff i never even thought about oh well thank you um you know we we
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talked about health i think uh in addition to the food any habits like how much you drink if you smoke if
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you do any of that kind of stuff you know you shouldn't assume that people are you know just
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okay with it hopefully you treat your body well but if you like to do anything you know recreationally
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i would advise highly advise against it but you know you just want to be on the same page you don't
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want someone saying oh it's natural and someone saying i don't want you to put that in your body
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when i was married my ex-husband didn't even want me to use certain lotions when i was expecting
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because he didn't want you know anything too strong on the baby and i said doesn't make sense to me but
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you know what doesn't have to make sense to me i'm gonna let it go this is not the hill i'm trying to
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die on as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on
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