JustPearlyThings - Keep Your Relationship PRIVATE

00:00:00.000 i would talk about like social including social media um so your expectations for your friend

00:00:08.320 group and your presence on the internet what you're going to share what you're not going to

00:00:13.280 do that no that's such a great that's such a great comment because i've actually like

00:00:19.280 i i feel like i've been in a public relationship before and i i actually would prefer to like

00:00:26.800 not tell people about that at all until like like i i feel like if people always ask me about like

00:00:34.240 who i'm dating and like all this but it's just like i feel like it's just no like i just rather

00:00:39.520 nobody know until i'm married once i'm married you can know who he is like but it's just like

00:00:44.880 because i've and i don't know if that's it would also you know it depends on the guy too like yes

00:00:51.120 but it's like i don't know i just i've been in a public relationship before and it caused so many

00:00:57.520 problems because you're worried about what people say oh yeah what people think and it's just

00:01:03.040 i i hated that it's it's not worth it there is no benefit it's just basically feeding people's

00:01:10.160 curiosity but at the end of the day it doesn't change anything about your relationship so i would

00:01:15.280 100 percent uh recommend that it's private especially when you have a platform like this

00:01:20.560 because not everybody wants the best for you and they'll smile in your face but then you know look

00:01:27.520 for ways to undermine and being in relationship can be hard enough especially when you're just starting

00:01:32.720 and you want to have a good foundation i keep my relationship private uh and i think the happiest

00:01:38.080 people that i know we found out when they wanted us to know and not a moment sooner what would you say

00:01:45.280 um for girls because a lot of girls get mad their boyfriends won't post them do you think that's

00:01:50.880 a reasonable thing to be mad about absolutely not i think he should embrace if he wants to protect

00:01:56.240 you see that's such a that's so much better of like a mindset then because in all honesty i i used to

00:02:03.280 get mad about that like like when i was younger me too and then it's just like i didn't realize that

00:02:09.360 he was doing it because of the problems that like came with it later yeah and in all honesty

00:02:15.040 like in hindsight i like realized i was wrong about that because it's like

00:02:20.320 i don't know it's just it's i saw the problems that came with it yeah the way that men look at

00:02:24.960 the world they operate like the enemy is always at the gate they are looking ahead at what's going

00:02:32.000 to happen after and as women we often think about the moment right we think about oh it's going to

00:02:37.200 feel so good to be claimed to be spoken for i want that you know i went through the same thing where

00:02:43.360 it was kind of like ah why do we have to keep this quiet but i held it together and i'm so happy now

00:02:49.840 especially having a public platform that you know nobody needs to know because you can ask yourself

00:02:54.800 okay we make an we make a post we are what do they call it instagram public or facebook public

00:03:00.960 and then what everybody that you know is going to have an opinion about it so then you're going to find

00:03:06.640 yourself explaining over analyzing every interaction i mean you see it all the time on i mean i do it

00:03:12.400 first i do it sometimes you know like on social media like will and jada they were the perfect couple

00:03:19.680 and now everyone over analyzes every little thing absolutely you know just like the two ladies that 0.99

00:03:24.880 shared their body count whether your body count is high or low i would recommend keep it very low why does

00:03:30.480 anybody need to know that moment that little thrill that you got that i have 27 people that i've slept

00:03:36.160 with or five people that i've slept with now that it's out there in the universe universe how is that

00:03:42.240 helping you you know and we're talking about kevin samuels what he always used to ask what does that past

00:03:48.640 bring the future husband that you want so there are some things you just need to take to the grave

00:03:53.360 wow what else on here all right we talked about social media so we have social media on here but

00:04:01.680 i would also add like friend groups oh because where do you think oh i was going to ask this earlier

00:04:07.520 as women we need to talk about our problems more than men absolutely would you agree with that so

00:04:13.680 when something's frustrating us i feel like sometimes men it's this is a fight that i feel like i see happen

00:04:20.320 and it's like a very much like the sexes don't understand each other because women we want to

00:04:24.720 talk about our problems right and men want to solve them all the time so we if we go to the men they

00:04:29.680 get frustrated absolutely because and it because they're like well you're not asking me to solve it

00:04:38.080 but at the same time the men don't understand well why don't you just not talk about it right and where

00:04:43.360 where do you think women should go to talk about their problems so a couple of things you definitely need 1.00

00:04:48.880 a group of other women that want to hear all the details if you want to share them but also want

00:04:54.880 you to win so it's really important to have that group that's another project that i'm working on we

00:04:59.440 can talk about later if you want to but you have to understand the way that men think and if you are

00:05:05.680 going to talk to him i would reverse the order so if you're asking him to make a decision lead with

00:05:11.120 that so sometimes i'll tell my guy i don't know let's say something at work happened you know i will say

00:05:17.280 you know should i do this should i travel for this meeting or should i stay home and then all the

00:05:21.760 reasons why i think it might be a good thing or or a bad thing sometimes as women we give all that 1.00

00:05:27.280 detail and men are looking for how do i how do i yeah exactly i just can't think of a couple times

00:05:35.520 right so it's exhausting for them you can even use that in the business world like even in a meeting like

00:05:40.880 set an agenda the purpose of this meeting is or what i want to be able to do after this meeting is make a go

00:05:46.000 no-go decision try to operate that way and just understand if a man doesn't want all of that

00:05:52.640 it's not that he loves you any less it's just that it's a burden that he can't do anything with

00:05:58.640 so help him help you so find some girlfriends if you must uh to talk about it but if you are going

00:06:05.600 to talk to your man lead first and then ask him do you want the detail he may say no and be okay with that

00:06:12.000 that's a great advice what what else on here um anything else we were missing i don't know what

00:06:19.360 do they say i did do we put friend groups on there because i think oh yeah that's that's so true you

00:06:25.040 know i there's this girl i follow i want to do reaction to it okay um no i didn't well i didn't

00:06:31.440 maybe maybe i could show you actually but okay but she um i followed this girl her name's like bunny 1.00

00:06:38.640 on tick tock and she's a big age gap right she's dating guys like 25 years older okay and i just

00:06:46.240 saw the slow evolution of her being married and she moved to la to like pursue the social media stuff

00:06:53.600 and then she started hanging out with some other single moms and then they started going to all these 0.99

00:06:59.280 events and i just remember like watching in real time thinking this girl is gonna get divorced because 1.00

00:07:04.240 she's not acting like the wife no really she's wearing these scantily clothed outfits and i'm just

00:07:11.120 like she's she's and she i just saw a video of her crying on tick tock talking about she got divorced

00:07:19.040 and i yeah i was thinking the friend group's important so what are you were you gonna say about

00:07:23.520 friend groups right i think it's important to know who's going to be in your circle uh and share that with

00:07:29.120 your spouse so you know he may ask you to cut off some male friends or some girlfriends that aren't

00:07:36.000 really helping you be your best self um if you have expectations or you like to do i don't know girls

00:07:42.400 trips or guys trips or you know go out all of that has to be talked about and i would say if he's not a

00:07:49.760 fan of it you should lay it down because ultimately he's the one responsible for you wow that's the one

00:07:59.040 what else i'm gonna milk you for all the information i see this is super this is actually super helpful

00:08:06.160 you're bringing up a lot of stuff i never even thought about oh well thank you um you know we we

00:08:11.440 talked about health i think uh in addition to the food any habits like how much you drink if you smoke if

00:08:18.400 you do any of that kind of stuff you know you shouldn't assume that people are you know just

00:08:23.040 okay with it hopefully you treat your body well but if you like to do anything you know recreationally

00:08:31.840 i would advise highly advise against it but you know you just want to be on the same page you don't

00:08:37.040 want someone saying oh it's natural and someone saying i don't want you to put that in your body

00:08:41.120 when i was married my ex-husband didn't even want me to use certain lotions when i was expecting

00:08:46.880 because he didn't want you know anything too strong on the baby and i said doesn't make sense to me but

00:08:52.240 you know what doesn't have to make sense to me i'm gonna let it go this is not the hill i'm trying to

00:08:56.160 die on as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on

00:09:03.520 this platform if you want to help please consider sending a super thanks below every donation helps and

00:09:10.800 it helps make what we do possible

JustPearlyThings - March 17, 2023

Keep Your Relationship PRIVATE

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