Man Claims that Men Should Sign the Marriage Contract
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
183.58076
Summary
Join us as we talk about the problems we see in the dating world today and how we can fix them. Join us in this episode as we discuss the problems of dating in the modern dating culture and how to fix them for men and women.
Transcript
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okay you can answer go ahead hello hey how's it going pearl i'm good how are you good just saw
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your live stream thought i'd call in okay um so what do you think is the solution for men and for
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women moving forward because i've had a lot of solutions for men so why don't why don't you give
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me one for both so this is actually a funny thing for me i became a mormon about 10 years ago right
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when like tinder was uh just starting up and becoming a thing okay and when i started watching
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your show i saw like how completely different the dating field is nowadays but i think probably the
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biggest thing right now is that there's no maturity around dating like people are just dating to have
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fun guys are dating to have fun and get as many girls as they want people aren't dating for the
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purpose of marrying and having kids anymore and and like the lds community that's what we do when we
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date we date because we're looking for somebody to marry instead of somebody to just have fun around
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with so it's it's crazy how much the mentality of dating has just completely changed in the last 10
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years because guys and girls nowadays they get married when they're running out of time and they're
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running out of options so what what is the solution to you moving forward dating with intention
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dating with intention but there's got to be like a cultural shift like everyone is viewed family as
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not being worth anything you know like family something that you do after you've had fun instead
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of you start your life with the intentions of having a family so unless people actually have a reason to
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get married there's no point you know if you're just marrying so that way you don't want to grow old and
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lonely that's it's a pretty sad way to enter marriage but if you're getting married with the
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intention of having a family you're dating different people than if you're just looking for somebody to
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have fun with so say say we're dating with the intention of having a family um do you think men
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should sign the marriage contract 100 okay why uh because when you sign a contract with men and women
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women when you enter into that marriage arrangement you're saying hey we're going to be together
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thicker than no matter what happens we're together for the purpose of having kids raising a family
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growing old together and dying together that's what your intention is when you get married unfortunately
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divorce has become so easy people get married i don't even know why people get married if they're
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not intending to you know right have a better purpose what i'm saying from like a guy's point of
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view why would you sign a contract that she's paid to leave when the divorce rate is 50
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like what incentive does he have well uh what's the purpose of getting married if that's what
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you're worried about and if you're dating the kind of girls that are going to do that then
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you need to find a better dating pool um so you think it's all on the on the men
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and the women they're no it's on both that's what i'm saying like normal normal women that you
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wouldn't expect still leave their husbands so it's like why would a guy sign a contract where
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she's paid to leave that comes down to trust like with my wife who when we got married about six years
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ago like when we got married it was to create a stable foundation for our family she could right now
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i'm in a place where there's no fault divorce she could at any time leave me but at the same time
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like we both have expectations of each other like i have expectations for her she has expectations for
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me we have to live up to it and uh one time we were joking uh when we were engaged we were walking
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in a river valley here and we ran into this old couple and they told us they've been married 60
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years and my wife asked like hey did you guys ever like think of divorce or anything and the old lady
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just looked at us she's like divorce she's like never honey murder a few times no and and i agree
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with you like i think that's the ideal but again i just think right now the laws are the way they are
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and is it wise to tell men to sign that contract with the laws being the way they are like i i just
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personally like have a hard time encouraging that because again like men are more likely to commit
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suicide after a divorce they could lose access to their children they could lose half of their
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everything they've worked 20 30 years to build up and it's if you get on a plane and there's a 50
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chance of you of it crashing are you likely to get on the plane probably not and like i i understand
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like there's different um in the mormon community i'm sure this isn't as prevalent but it this most
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people don't live in that community and so what is the average guy supposed to do
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oh i 100 agree like i said the culture is completely messed up nowadays outside like i didn't realize how
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messed up it become until i started watching your shows and seeing yeah what the people you bring
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off the street actually say it just blew my mind yeah but um i think i think probably so it's kind of
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like what's the real solution going forward me and my wife we're open about talking about this stuff
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and like for example like i we've talked about one time like the number one thing that triggers
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divorce is the guy losing his job and it's not that my wife would ever want to like dish me just
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because i lose my job i mean i make a healthy income she's able to be a stay-at-home mom
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but at the same time i know that if the income stops coming in her uncertainty is going to go
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through the roof and she's gonna eventually just be her own biology is going to force her to leave
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so and on the flip side you know i i tell her you know like i gotta sometimes i'm a little horny and i
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want to have sex sometimes and she understands that and then at the same time i tell her hey i'm out
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making the money you can help my certainty a ton by taking care of the home making sure the place
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is nice doing the classic like being a home mother kind of situation so when i come home i'm able i
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don't come home to more chaos in my life no and i agree and of course we help each other out no and i
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i agree that's how it should be but my question still is what is the solution moving forward
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you you would still say that men should sign a contract that women are paid to leave
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because again like it's it's nice to say oh in an ideal situation this is how it should be but
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we're in modern times but i'm also in modern times and i like lds culture and it's not just lds but
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also like more orthodox christian and uh other religious groups we still live in the culture where
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marriage is a big deal and it's culturally enforced so my best advice to men would be to go
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and go into a culture where marriage is valued there's still pockets of it out there everywhere
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it's not mainstream you're going to be going into a pool where there's women and men who have
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expectations and you have expectations so my best advice to guys would be to go enter into one of
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those cultures where there's still that pressure from her family from your family from the people in
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your community to maintain marriage as what it should be as opposed to going in out and dating people
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in a place where that's not you know there's no cultural pressure to stay together because then
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you're trying to rely on legal pressure and you know you see how far that goes yeah i just i don't
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know it doesn't really sit right with me to tell guys to sign a contract that women are paid to leave
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and trust that she won't and go just go to somewhere where her friends and her family will tell her not to
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you know yeah you know i can see i can honestly tell you if you're looking at it from a pure legal
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standpoint and the only thing that's forcing you two to stay together is a legal contract that's
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easily broken then there's no point you need more than just a legal contract there is a question in
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the chat do mormons have multiple wives that's a thing in mormon is that right no there's a there's a
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break off of our church that's broke off like a hundred years ago that practices it but uh there's
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always the joke you don't brother i see you're lacking wives here take one of mine okay i was
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just curious uh well thank you for calling in i appreciate it no problem um i wanted to see i feel
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like i saw a stat and i don't want to i wasn't going to quote this because i'm not sure and i don't
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want to quote anything i'm not 100 sure of but i swear i saw something that said that religious
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people like the marriage rates aren't a lot better than with the normal population i don't know chat if
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you know where that is let me know i'm gonna look it up after the show because i'm just curious because
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okay a lot of times we get the church right they'll come in and say return to traditionalism but
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unfortunately as sad as it is i just don't think there's any going back and again
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people that get married before the age of 24 are 39 more likely to get divorced
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are traditional outcomes better in modern times i don't know i don't have all the answers so
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that's why i'm saying call in let me know what you guys think
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um i want to look up the church marriage i swore it was not that different but i could i could be
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women would you give up a wedding for a marriage the average wedding costs 20 000 would you give up
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a wedding for a marriage because that's one thing i've seen is that guys don't want to get married
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because they don't want to pay for the ring and pay for the wedding and like pay for like
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it's so expensive and why why do you need that expensive of a wedding and a ring to get a husband
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i'm going to read some of the super chats so one solution take the government out of marriage to
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remove incentives to walk away marriage is still a very fulfilling partnership the best way to stay
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together is to just stay together yeah but you can't help it if your wife leaves you
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what do you you can't help that um your whatsapp call number is not working that's what they say
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i can't find out how to call but my wife and i got married as virgins i was broke because of her
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and i am now well above 100k we've been happily married for uh let's say 13 years and half as many
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of you know i was just banned on tiktok and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform
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