JustPearlyThings - April 12, 2023


Men are SHAMED for having STANDARDS

Hosted by
Mentioned
MEN are MORE ABUSED than WOMEN What Women Bring To Table In RELATIONSHIPS

Episode Stats


Length

11 minutes

Words per minute

197.96

Word count

2,207

Sentence count

—

Harmful content

Misogyny

12

sentences flagged

Hate speech

3

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss what we would like in a man, what we want in a woman, and what we are looking for in a partner. We also discuss our personal standards and the expectations we have for our partners.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 questions go around what are your personal standards yeah so what would you expect from
00:00:06.080 a woman and what would you guys expect from a man like minimum requirements to date them 0.94
00:00:10.220 well i'd say right now i can't expect much um but i'm you know in the process as i said i'm young
00:00:16.720 and uh i do plan on you know making six figures eventually i got the six foot down on lock and i
00:00:23.420 think i'm pretty cute so eventually i'll have the standards set in place but right now i'm focused
00:00:28.180 on my career but i do have you know anticipations for my standards such as um you know submission
00:00:35.360 like um and just peace of mind someone who can offer me peace of mind you know someone that's
00:00:42.640 not always in my ear like you did this wrong i don't want that you know like if i'm if i'm willing
00:00:48.400 to provide right um and be the breadwinner then um if she wants to work fine but obviously the 1.00
00:00:57.900 the common thing is that prefer she stays home yes but if she does want to work right everyone 1.00
00:01:06.820 says you need a you need the masculine trait to work right um especially in a career so
00:01:12.380 but like once she gets home she drops that masculinity at the door because i'm not i'm not
00:01:19.000 competing in my own household i gotta compete with other men out in the world they look at me
00:01:23.200 six foot tattoos beard and then they just like assume i'm top dog and then competition time i
00:01:29.940 don't know if that's more of a you thing so like because i'm a you but uh yeah it's certainly what
00:01:36.680 i'm experiencing right now so i definitely do not want to have that in the household that i'm paying
00:01:41.080 yeah i agree i think for me my woman must offer peace man because i know how much i work i know
00:01:53.240 how i don't know when i come home i want her that my household to be my my safe space to be you know
00:01:59.340 peaceful and relaxed and also i think the most number one thing is she's got to be she's got to
00:02:05.200 be feminine she has to be able to submit um she has to be family orientated because i don't have 1.00
00:02:10.920 kids yet but that's that's the main goal i want to have kids i want her to be a family-based person 1.00
00:02:16.120 um preach yeah is that how your girl is now yeah yeah yeah yeah she's like that one's the wedding 0.97
00:02:23.420 smile we're working on it so don't put me under pressure
00:02:27.460 so um i do want in my terms i do want a a man who respects me i want a masculine man so
00:02:39.260 exactly what you guys are saying a man who has great achievements he has a path he's ready to work on
00:02:47.080 himself to make himself better and he also respects me and someone that i will feel proud of and i would
00:02:54.500 want to nurture give him the love and support as you said as a woman and be his his number one fan
00:03:01.840 i want to be his home i want to be the person that he can come to me where everyone else he'll be a bit
00:03:07.380 on guard and he will feel comfortable to just drop it a little bit because i am his home so what what
00:03:14.180 does he have to have because you're kind of describing what you want to be for him but the question was
00:03:18.160 like what what does he have to be in order to get that so for me it's rather than the
00:03:24.140 do you have a height requirement no no he can be short at five foot i dated a man that was shorter
00:03:29.400 than me before for two years okay i'm not i will say this i'm not very normal but
00:03:34.400 for me i have learned the value of the true value of a person isn't their exterior it's it's their
00:03:43.480 insides it's their personalities it's whether they fit me so for example one of the things because i did a
00:03:48.720 personality test of jordan peterson's okay and one of the things he looks at is agreeableness
00:03:53.060 and one of my criterias i want for my man is i want him to be less agreeable than me
00:03:59.980 why because i am quite agreeable and i'm always worrying that maybe i might step on someone's toes
00:04:07.480 but someone who's less agreeable is not going to be as easily uh you know like offended so i like
00:04:13.680 that i don't have to feel you know like can i tell you are you going to get offended so for
00:04:19.220 example that's so you want to do so okay this is like kind of broad so i just i want to be a little
00:04:24.460 bit more specific so you want someone disagreeable what else so what some more disagreeable does he
00:04:29.940 have to have an income income requirement i would like him to be um from a skill set knowledge income
00:04:38.200 level equal to me okay which is roughly well i um i earn around three thousand a month so maybe
00:04:45.260 something like that okay um is there anything else so you want roughly like at your income or more
00:04:51.700 would you ever submit to a guy that makes less than you yes because it's not about the now people
00:04:59.000 are changing no no he's staying at that it's not build a man so he's no no no it's not i'm not saying
00:05:04.460 that i'm trying to build him that's it but this is the thing like just because a man may not be as
00:05:09.360 good now doesn't mean he isn't later it's about it's about realizing no but i'm saying like a lot
00:05:13.920 of times like girls we we try to build a man like we go to build a bear but but guys like like typically
00:05:20.960 no no no no but i'm saying i'm saying like when you said it's not about the now it's about the later
00:05:25.220 that's implying that you're you would want him to his income to increase but i'm saying like most
00:05:30.460 guys guys kind of are where they're at especially like you said you're 34 so if a guy's 35 like 35
00:05:37.960 like i'd imagine you want roughly your age or older so so for me that's the thing like so for me
00:05:44.820 i honestly all i'm gonna say is i've realized that the physical shell of things
00:05:52.180 they're not as important as peace and the the person that's inside does that come with age
00:06:00.020 though did you realize that 100 this is and this is the thing like this is something i've learned
00:06:05.420 this is something that i internalized i had to go i was single for i've been single still single for a
00:06:11.620 long time because guess what i needed to work on myself like if i'm broken and i'm not in the right
00:06:16.800 frame of mind i'm gonna end up damaging another person i don't want that if i'm not ready then i'm
00:06:21.620 gonna work on myself and to be honest like yes i'll be it's difficult to give you a figure but
00:06:28.140 the people with the six figures who are getting all these girls and driving lambos i don't want 1.00
00:06:33.160 them either is is monogamy a requirement for you for me yes okay do you feel like that's a fair deal
00:06:39.600 for a guy um because he's not getting you for your best years that depends on what the man wants
00:06:47.220 so i'm saying like long term like i'm and this is going for like me too none of us are virgins anymore
00:06:53.000 so i think like men value purity and youth right and they're not getting that anymore so do you
00:06:58.780 think it's a fair deal for men when they're not getting that to be monogamous to us to comprise
00:07:03.100 on their mating strategy when we don't fulfill theirs because we're not virgins anymore
00:07:06.740 because i feel like when you talk about something and saying that that's the only reason you have value
00:07:12.960 i think that's wrong it's not it's that it's not i'm not saying that's the only reason you have
00:07:17.340 value i'm talking about your value in the dating market and like like results are harsh the world's
00:07:22.480 harsh and like the truth is modern women are less pure than they've ever been and we're older than 1.00
00:07:27.960 we've ever been so i'm asking do you think that's a fair deal for men when they have to be more and
00:07:32.160 more less if a man is going to look at me and say that the only value i come i can bring to the
00:07:38.620 table is because of my no i didn't say the only value so i'm not saying that's the only value like
00:07:44.280 you seem like a smart girl i know you have more than just that but i'm saying in the dating market
00:07:47.940 like this is what it starts with and it's harsh but it's reality but we're sorry i'm just i'm but
00:07:54.260 you're saying we're going with age and we're going with well it's like men men value purity and youth
00:07:59.600 so they they like young virgins that's the that's the ideal just like our ideal is like rich men
00:08:05.540 right but i'm saying now in today's day and age like women have higher standards than ever but 1.00
00:08:10.820 bring less to the table than ever we're older we've slept with more people and we have less
00:08:15.660 loyalty because we're the ones leaving them so is it a fair deal yeah so i'm saying do you think
00:08:20.980 that's a fair deal for men i think it generally depends on the person i'm sorry i can't answer
00:08:26.760 that question okay go ahead what are your requirements for a guy uh that he's aware of the the traditional
00:08:34.420 gender roles okay and i have to like and i expect that and he expects that from me and reciprocity
00:08:40.180 and i think respect is and i can't i don't expect him just to respect me just like that because i'm a
00:08:44.420 woman i think he needs to get to know me and um the relationship has to be reciprocal and i i i'm 28
00:08:51.440 and i don't i actually want him to be polygynous really yeah what they're gonna they're gonna fall in
00:08:59.360 love with you in the chat the reason why and um i could speak so much about this they're calling you
00:09:07.640 an indian queen right now oh my god the reason why is because i'm the biggest introvert i know
00:09:15.680 i'm like i need my solitude and i i hate saying that because people are like oh god you know she's
00:09:21.880 so up there but i really like i get drained so me coming today i was like i really need to prepare
00:09:25.960 myself yeah um because i i get drained with interaction and i'm i if i love my husband
00:09:30.940 and i need to get over the fact that i don't need to be clinged on to him because that's unrealistic
00:09:34.960 um but if i love my husband i want him to be taken care of and and if i don't have to worry about that
00:09:40.680 yeah that's great wow and that's as simple as i can put it how are you how are you single
00:09:45.760 what's like no no no i'm not oh okay sorry guys sorry i forgot i thought you said you were
00:09:51.700 no but yeah i mean i know that there there is so much that could be said about polygyny yeah
00:09:56.680 hard eyes hard at indian synth indian woman i was like the chat's gonna love her oh no sorry i've
00:10:03.000 got i've got a question um are you in a polygynous relationship uh i'm with somebody who is open to
00:10:11.340 that and and and hey that's great for me would you want multiple wives or would you just want like 1.00
00:10:17.100 he could step out whenever he wants the thing is i i i would that he would they would have to be
00:10:22.260 wives okay because you know because then i'll because i would lose respect for him because then i'm 1.00
00:10:29.320 like then you know you guys are using each other and no so if we can actually marry them and you know 0.99
00:10:35.240 then like if there's children out there accidentally you know i want my children to have
00:10:38.660 you know honorable half siblings not like just some you know some straight child do you have to be the
00:10:44.800 main though do you have to be no i don't care if i'm two i just you know i'm so over it like
00:10:50.160 you know and and guess what it's very freeing yeah it's very freeing is that um are you are you from
00:10:56.280 india or like like is that is that common in india or no is that like no i don't know i haven't seen
00:11:01.800 it like well yeah actually yes it is it is okay but not as common but it does happen that answer
00:11:07.920 your question
00:11:08.440 you
00:11:08.900 you