JustPearlyThings - April 14, 2023


Modern Woman Got Hit With FACT


Episode Stats

Length

8 minutes

Words per Minute

217.95065

Word Count

1,920

Sentence Count

1


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 better if she was at home with you not rather than working not necessarily and i'm gonna tell
00:00:05.360 you why because my mom and her side of the family they come from a place of very private very keep
00:00:10.880 keep even if she was home she wouldn't have taught me because it for them it was a sense of pride
00:00:15.280 and it's something we don't talk about why didn't why didn't she learn femininity from like her mom
00:00:19.760 but i think she did oh she did she did but it's just in that generation how they learned it and
00:00:24.880 so it's not that she didn't teach me anything absolutely she taught me stuff but the things
00:00:28.320 that i had to just kind of do osmosis not really but in college when i got around my friends and
00:00:33.760 when i when i observed them they were they took my level of feminine energy and hygiene to another
00:00:40.240 level because i had good friends in a circle but the responsibility shouldn't have lied on them
00:00:44.480 and it didn't and then i got to a certain age and it's like well i want to get even better about this
00:00:48.560 but these are honestly they're hard conversations to have when you have you don't feel a level of
00:00:54.640 vulnerability and comfort that for whatever reason i don't believe my mom felt who um i'm curious who
00:01:00.240 on the panel feels like their mom taught them to be a proper wife auntie jenny yeah really wow
00:01:09.840 this is crazy i was um raised by my great grandmother but i felt like she taught me the
00:01:14.640 proper way just unfortunately didn't work for me and guys this is just a random group of women this
00:01:20.000 isn't like cherry picked this is you guys had recruiters reach out to you it's copy and paste
00:01:24.320 instagram people with open profiles um usually and i will say my grandma that my grandmother influences
00:01:30.400 unfortunately they died when i was young but they it was an influence from them but if it's not
00:01:35.680 cultivated throughout life if it's only for a certain stint it's the seed is planted but we need
00:01:40.000 somebody else to come along and cultivate that then to grow that so it's in there but i had to go in and
00:01:44.800 later in life when i realized it wasn't cultivated properly go back and re-stimulate that and cultivate it
00:01:49.840 yeah and i'm not saying you can't learn it later but it's just like you're starting it's like you're
00:01:54.240 competing with women that were raised to be wives so they've been learning to be a wife from 10 years
00:01:58.560 old and you you said you started at like 27 28 so having to relearn right so even even if you learned
00:02:05.920 you know for i'm behind five years it's like i'm compared to the girls that started yeah yeah
00:02:12.480 it's a lot yeah no for sure and it's it's a it's an honest question when i'm dating now and people
00:02:16.160 are like well you're 33 you're single you're accomplished whatever whatever you're beautiful
00:02:20.160 why aren't you married it is a very good question do you feel that you've become the man you wanted
00:02:24.480 to marry so man so what i mean maybe no no so so i'm saying like in terms of your accomplishments
00:02:31.840 like you'd want a guy with your similar accomplishments like you're in shape you'd want a guy in shape like
00:02:35.840 you like would you say a lot of your accomplishments like have maybe become the man you wanted to marry
00:02:41.120 no i wouldn't because i don't necessarily want to marry a man who's established in that way i'll marry
00:02:45.840 somebody who's just literally a driver right that isn't you wouldn't prefer it you wouldn't prefer
00:02:51.040 someone and i'm i'm gonna be really honest right now and say not necessarily because what i find
00:02:56.240 is those type of men the character isn't always there right because they are looking for the 20
00:03:02.240 year olds who are equal so everything being equal driver lawyer you wouldn't pick the lawyer i don't
00:03:08.560 want to yeah i would never marry another lawyer the debates and the competition that's a fair point
00:03:12.960 now i'm like i would never you know i i i i find it so interesting that um women are not demonized for
00:03:18.560 raising women but men are demon demonized for not raising men it's it's so it's so interesting to
00:03:25.120 me and it just goes back to you know the privilege of being a woman in that we're i'm judged by
00:03:30.480 different standards that's so true because whenever there's a a kid or they'll always say oh he had a
00:03:35.760 deadbeat dad but they never really talk about the women i mean that in a way had deadbeats beat moms
00:03:42.000 because they weren't present it has to be extreme like she has to be strung out and yeah i'm sorry i
00:03:47.040 i don't want to interrupt but i gotta go by oh i want to say thank you for for having me and letting
00:03:53.200 me come through and thank y'all everybody okay thank you for coming absolutely i think i wasn't raised
00:04:03.200 to be a housewife or to be a wife at all anything in that was your mom in the picture yeah so my mom
00:04:08.240 and dad are still with each other i still i still live at home do you do you was it was did she work
00:04:13.360 or like my mom and dad they both worked so like my nanny and granddad would look after me when i
00:04:17.120 was younger but i would still see how my mom would treat my dad and what she would do for my dad you
00:04:21.680 know i still took that into account of how i treat a man i'm just curious how did you like growing up
00:04:26.080 with a nanny did you so it was my own it was my grandmother is my own grandmother oh i thought you
00:04:31.040 had a nanny nanny so so do you know i was still getting the same like you know what i mean so i can only
00:04:37.680 like i said i can only speak for myself in this i wasn't taught right you do this for a man and you do that
00:04:42.320 for a man but i seen what was done for a man and i took that into account okay so this is how i'll
00:04:47.280 treat my husband i'll cook for my husband if he wants to put something into the house he can put
00:04:50.960 something to the house if he's if he's the main breadwinner if not if he's the man of the house
00:04:54.720 you know did you did you grow up like fixing your data plate ever did they ever teach you that sort of
00:04:59.120 stuff i'm kind of i got taught like if you're making dinner for yourself you're making dinner for
00:05:03.120 everybody no matter who was around you you know what i mean that's what i was kind of so what where did you
00:05:06.880 feel like you were lacking like what what do you do you feel like wasn't there i feel like i wasn't
00:05:13.440 taught properly how you know this whole when you're younger men will like pick on you and like oh if he's
00:05:19.120 picking on you it means he likes you this i see that as now as well i wasn't taught that like when you're
00:05:24.240 older men still might not be like you're amazing you're a princess like the disney world they'll probably
00:05:28.800 say different so do you feel like you were more lied to by the media or by your family probably by the
00:05:33.040 media rather than my family yeah in my opinion definitely they sold you a dream sort of oh
00:05:38.320 do you guys do you guys who of you feels like you were sold trying to right way to phrase this
00:05:45.760 question who here feels like they were sold a prince charming that was never going to come like there's
00:05:53.280 some perfect guy and it's okay if you don't i'm just wondering you do i'm still waiting for him i think
00:05:58.480 it was a harsh reality because my mom and dad have been together like just i'm just curious just one
00:06:04.080 no me just one no you didn't feel like that you didn't feel like okay cool go ahead so my mom and
00:06:08.080 dad have been together like from like really young they've been together ever since they're not married
00:06:12.000 but they've been together like a long time so i always just thought that's what happens like so when
00:06:16.720 i met my first boyfriend it didn't work out it was like oh okay like i am a relationship person i love
00:06:23.120 love like i just wanted it to be like that so whenever i met someone and it failed it was always
00:06:28.880 like a oh you know so it wasn't that i don't think anyone failed me but it was like a full sense of
00:06:35.040 like oh like you know i mean you do say are you in a relationship now no no okay um and you say you're
00:06:41.360 you're a relationship person do you feel like you present yourself like one um i wouldn't say i'm
00:06:48.560 really looking for that now probably that's why it maybe comes across like that no i'm asking you
00:06:54.320 i didn't say you did or you didn't um i'm not really looking so i wouldn't say i present myself
00:07:00.320 as someone that's looking like do you do you want to look in the future maybe i don't know i just think
00:07:05.280 when when you have so many i think so many failed you know like you said like your your numbers go up
00:07:11.760 and you know like you i just don't i want i don't want to keep um hitting a brick wall like i'm just
00:07:17.760 like oh i'd rather just focus on being happy focus on making money and yeah have you ever
00:07:24.960 thought about why you failed in the in the past do you know why um i think i not to be deep but i think
00:07:34.000 i go for like broken men and i try to fix them i've just always done it do you think you are what you
00:07:41.120 attract um i don't think i don't think so maybe i don't know i wouldn't say so no i just i'm quite
00:07:51.280 an empath so i just like to i like to care you're like a fixer yeah yeah it'd just be nice to just
00:07:59.200 not fix someone it'd be nice to meet someone and then just be like you know just good have you have
00:08:04.000 you met guys that you don't have to fix um not in a relationship time probably no never like not
00:08:10.720 on the street not you know i mean like i said unless i don't know i've just been in relationships
00:08:16.400 to be honest and then when i'm in a relationship i'm not actively you know so and then if i'm not
00:08:20.960 in a relationship i'm dealing with what happened and then yeah so i don't i don't really unless i'm
00:08:28.640 interacting on like a friendship level as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are
00:08:36.160 demonetized on a daily basis on this platform if you want to help please consider sending a super
00:08:43.200 thanks below every donation helps and it helps make what we do possible