Modern Woman Got Reality Check
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
221.03171
Summary
In this episode, we talk about sex, sex education, sex before marriage and sex after marriage. We also talk about what it's like to be a single mum at a young age and what it means to be in a monogamous relationship.
Transcript
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could go back in time would you wait until you were married to have sex yes
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yeah you would I don't know because I feel like every every relationship that
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I've been in I've learned something from so it's like if I said I'd go back and
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change it and not do it then I wouldn't learn I wouldn't have learned the things
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that I wouldn't moving forward so I don't know it's it's almost like saying
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and I'm just gonna eliminate experiences that I've had yeah but if they ended
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bad like what value does like sexual experience bring to you now like what
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what you know if you're gonna let's say you meet your husband tomorrow and you're
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going into a marriage and you could have just slept with him yeah or slept with
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him and all these other guys like don't you think it would be better to just
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sleep with him I understand what you're saying because obviously when you get
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married the love that you have for that person other people that you've been in
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relationship is definitely different because you're married and you're gonna
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build a life with them so I think when I get to that I'll probably be like oh do
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you know what I wish I would have waited yeah now I haven't I'm not trying to
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settle down I'm not in that time of my life so my perspective is going to be
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different what age would you like to settle down if I'm completely honest it's
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all about when my career is is if when I'm happy with where I am in my life if
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that makes sense because I wouldn't want to settle down not having achieved
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everything that I want to achieve on myself because I'm kind of quite selfish in
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that I want to be very successful do a lot have tons of businesses so I think
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say fight I blew up and I had all this success by the time I was 27 then cool
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I'll look for when I'm 27 but it depends on where I am financially and stuff
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like that to be honest what value does your career bring to a guy well music I
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want to inspire people and motivate people and I want to make a change I want to
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yeah but men don't care he's like oh I'm looking for a girl to inspire and
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motivate you know what I mean yeah yeah a hundred percent I think it's like you're
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young now you're pretty now and but you're gonna be less pretty and less
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young in ten years in five years so like why would you not look for that when
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you're younger I mean I look I look quite young now so maybe when I'm older I'll
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still look young I know but I just know what I want out of life yes I I do want a
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family for me that's very important I don't have any siblings and all my family
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members are very far spread out across the world so what for me I need that
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security so just just a stat for you guys did you know if you hit 30 and you and
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you're still single you drop to a less than 50 percent chance of you being able
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to have a kid meaning that if you're still single you're more likely to not
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have a kid than have one and so it's like knowing that you wouldn't want like
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because you know you're 24 now right yeah let's say you date a guy tomorrow and you
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date him for three years and it doesn't work out yeah it's like then no no now
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you're a bit older and you have to keep yeah I do think everything happens for a
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reason though if I'm completely honest like I could turn 30 and find my dream
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guy the next day do you know I mean and then build a relationship with you can
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you could but the odds aren't in your favor yeah and the number and that's what
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that's what I'm saying like I think a lot of times society tells us to go
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after a career first when it would be a lot easier if we if we were married
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because you could have the same experiences you could just have them with your
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husband very true but then what if he then wanted to have kids with you
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straightaway then you'd have to sacrifice that and you want to be a
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mother oh yeah I want like five kids 90% of your eggs are gone by 30 yeah so
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wait way too long you can't have five your geriatric you know when geriatric
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pregnancy starts any of you 34 what's geriatric you know the answer I was going
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for them so geriatric pregnancy is like high-risk pregnancy you know when that
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starts I'd probably say 30 30 plus I know it's 40 right no 28 it's 35 really so
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high-risk pregnancy starts at 35 and IVF it's actually most likely that it won't
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work out I'm IVF I'm IVF I'm an IVF baby my parents started trying to have a kid at
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34 I think but I think they had complications anyway yeah no and they're
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lucky that you you they're lucky but that's not the norm like the majority
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of IVF it doesn't work out yeah and there's complications as well so yeah
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but we can do stuff like freeze our eggs and stuff like that I know that again
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it's it's not 100% but but like you know but but even like the odds aren't if
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you're over it's like it's a less than 50% chance that you eat that that works out
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that you actually even conceive the kid so it's like they kind of lie to us because
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they tell them you they tell us we have all these options when we don't when half
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of your options are also gone by 30 so the number of options you have at 20 by
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the time you get to 30 half of them are gone don't you think it's a lot of
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pressure on a woman yeah it's actually quite sad like even this conversation is
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open my eyes you're being told some people are saying that women shouldn't
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have a career they should focus on their marriage and care about their husband
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and their children other people want to not have housewives and want their woman to
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have a career but then we have the pressure of not being able to have kids
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at a certain age there's just there's so much for women to kind of squeeze in
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well that's the thing you can't have everything but it's like what outcomes
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do you want like what I already yeah yeah what what outcomes would make you
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happy everyone has different priority right and so it's kind of a trade-off
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because you know women over the age of 45 that are still single and
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childless like they're on drugs they're on drugs at a higher rate than any other
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group and they're more depressed than any other group and they don't tell us that
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we're really on a time clock and and they don't really warn us about that and
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you just you can't have everything and so it's the question of like what outcome do
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you want personally for me I've had this conversation myself a fair few years ago
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actually and I want the fame and fortune and to have a career but I need a
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family right for my mental health so if I had a pill one of them was to have a
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family one of them to be famous I would have a family because that's what I need
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right right so why wouldn't you prioritize that now knowing knowing that
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the quality of guy you're gonna get is only gonna get worse like right now that
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you're the most attractive you're ever gonna be you know it'd be one thing if
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you were fat then you could lose weight and get up but you're in shape right
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because always give me this exception like because if you're fat you duh but
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but you know you're in good shape so it's like this is the highest quality guy
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you're ever gonna be able to get yeah and now it's only gonna get worse I hear
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that but for me to raise a family the way I want to raise it I want to have money
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that's not for me to go spoil my kids because I don't I think raisins kids
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spoil doesn't teach them anything but I would want them to not struggle the way
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that I've struggled could you marry a guy with money would I marry a guy of course yeah
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so why don't you just do that because you could you're pretty enough I mean
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thank you I could do but I wouldn't be fulfilled and I think in life it's all
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about fulfilling your own hopes and dreams and stuff like that so what is it
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like this dream this world doesn't sound real to me and this is come I come from
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like my dad's a top like 1% earner he's very very successful and like I grew up
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around successful people but yeah this this doesn't sound real where okay because
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where the mom has this successful career and the dad also has the
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successful career and they also have kids they also have five kids like
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something's got to give you literally can't do everything or you're paying a
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nanny to raise your kid I mean to be fair I'm not gonna lie if I had money and I
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was a businesswoman and I was busy I would have help if I could afford it I
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genuinely would have help and that's not me saying oh I can't be bothered to look
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after my children it is but I would be there for the important parts though say if I
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had it's not the same I do understand where you're coming from but that would
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be the sacrifice that I would take I would want my kids to see a working mom
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as well right but that's the problem that's the modern mindset it's about my
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career and me before the family and I think that's like what what is so broken
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down nowadays is that we all care about ourselves before the family and and to
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have a family that's successful you have to be selfless you know our
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grandmothers and our great-grandmothers didn't stay with their
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husbands by thinking about themselves yeah yeah I do because mothers put
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their child before ourselves when they have children when they don't have
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children obviously you should be thinking about that ahead of time I am
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doing by creating a career for myself to provide for the family that I wouldn't
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want so as many of you know I was just banned on tick-tock and we are
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