JustPearlyThings - Modern Women Got SCHOOLED on ADOPTION

00:00:00.240 and it shows that we're more likely to be depressed if we have more sexual partners

00:00:04.640 we're more likely to i can't remember all the stats off the top of my head but it's like we're more

00:00:09.360 likely to be depressed we're more likely to have all of these issues the more sexual partners we

00:00:13.120 have and if we don't have a family over the age of 45 we become very depressed and the data is

00:00:19.680 super clear on this now i believe what about men if they have more sexual partners they also get

00:00:25.200 depressed but the difference the difference well no woman is a slut if she sleeps around but man is 0.96

00:00:29.920 a hero but there's not there's not the same repercussions for men and for women because

00:00:33.440 men care about women's body count women don't typically care about men's body 1.00

00:00:38.160 i saw some interesting research that was measuring like different hormones and responses in men and

00:00:44.640 women and they did find that when a man and woman like sleep together like first time they've met 0.50

00:00:53.280 there is like this oxytocin like love response from the woman that isn't from the man where the man's

00:01:01.440 like oxytocin starts to grow where love starts to develop is when a woman is in his company getting

00:01:08.560 to know him for weeks on end and you know like i think i i yeah shame is absolutely a useful human

00:01:16.640 adaptation and that's why we've still got it to the level but actually i think we could start with just

00:01:22.000 giving women proper information education like i mean you know i think that so many young women are 0.58

00:01:29.120 just given this message you know that empowerment is slut walks and that there are no consequences 0.94

00:01:35.680 and that that's just a clump of cells if you want to get rid of it get rid of it and you will never

00:01:40.080 have any second thoughts about it definitely i think if we just have like frank and honest conversations

00:01:45.920 we might be able to help women to make the right choices for them i don't think there's any shame

00:01:50.720 with like women getting to 50 and not having a child if that's their decision like you know there

00:01:56.720 are women who genuinely like they have different life goals um but when it's the case that actually 0.99

00:02:04.880 they've just been misguided they've been told that they didn't need to rush they've been told that they

00:02:09.440 should focus on their career and they get to 50 and they go oh my god i've made really bad decisions

00:02:15.760 that have got me to a place where i've got like half of my life to live regretting the fact that i

00:02:21.440 didn't well you know sort out the family 80 that's just really sad you know 80 of women that don't have 0.55

00:02:27.680 kids wish they had them yeah exactly yeah and so it's like i just think you know when you when you hear

00:02:33.600 from them they were lied to that is the issue uh king um can you pull up the super chats my laptop

00:02:41.280 died i don't think my charger how interesting why cannot older women adopt children and have a family 0.80

00:02:47.200 and more women probably might want to adopt because honestly childbirth hurts well it's a painful thing 0.99

00:02:51.920 and it hurts but it's a beautiful magical experience yeah i understand but if you cannot have a baby

00:02:59.600 i think it's selfish as a single woman to adopt you're gonna put your kid 0.99

00:03:03.360 at every statistical disadvantage because you want a kid instead of letting that kid grow up in a

00:03:09.120 two-parent household like why would you choose that it's not necessarily she's single she's just 0.80

00:03:13.200 older because she was focusing on the career well she was asked to pay 50 50 i mean if she's if she's 0.98

00:03:17.840 if she's married then i think that's one thing but i also think like most men want a wife for kids 0.76

00:03:23.200 but do you know what so it's kind of like what do they get out of it let me say this adoption is

00:03:28.080 imperative do you know what kids go through in the foster care field you know i actually i do

00:03:33.200 because um i've been on both ends of adoption where my parents they gave up one of my brothers and

00:03:37.840 they actually adopted a different one so we've actually been on both ends um so because one

00:03:42.960 brother my parents gave up when um my mom was 17 same parents but they gave him up for adoption

00:03:48.000 i met him when i was 22 grew up with a completely different family um and we also adopted teenagers

00:03:53.600 that were in the foster care system that the problem is not giving up kids for adoption it's actually if you

00:03:59.280 give an infant up for adoption you're most likely going to find a family that wants to adopt them

00:04:04.480 the issue is these crackhead moms will keep the kid for like five years and the government will take 1.00

00:04:10.240 them and now what what parent is going to want a kid that's been basically yeah it's up because by

00:04:15.600 the time they're three their brains mentally and i've been on both ends like they um i know a couple that

00:04:21.520 adopted two brothers one brother was five one brother was like two or one and a half when they adopted him

00:04:27.200 the older brother it was like they couldn't even though they're super nice parents like he was too

00:04:32.560 developed and like he ended up stealing from them he always in and out of trouble the younger brother

00:04:36.960 was like a musical genius i actually really just depends on the age so i actually straight out of

00:04:41.600 college that was my first job right foster care uh social worker right case manager or whatever like

00:04:47.040 that grew up with foster care we always adopted different family members stuff like grew up in this

00:04:52.800 around the scene stories and all that it is imperative for adoptions to happen because

00:04:57.520 when people give up these kids he's saying crackhead moms whatever like that these kids when they're not 1.00

00:05:02.480 adopted whether it's by a single woman or not they go through the system they jump from home to home 0.99

00:05:06.720 a lot of them are beaten molested uh essayed all types of things happen to them just from being in

00:05:12.240 the in the system right so i would rather a kid be adopted by a single woman than to be in the system 1.00

00:05:17.760 messed up now growing up with mental health mental health issues because they've been bounced around

00:05:23.120 from home to home to home to all types of things typically like in the situations i've seen the

00:05:27.680 single women typically want young children and i think in that situation it's quite i i just think

00:05:33.520 it's quite selfish to like pick to have a kid at every statistical disadvantage when it should be in

00:05:38.480 a two-parent household if you could give a kid love give them love i understand like giving them love and

00:05:43.840 sure like maybe for the kids that have nowhere else to go but i i just think if you're gonna take a

00:05:50.000 baby where it they could be in a two-parent household i think it's better to be in a two-parent

00:05:54.960 household i don't know why you would bring them up in a situation where they're at a disadvantage

00:05:59.760 and there's so many two parents that want to adopt but taking a kid so the infants are the high

00:06:05.760 like that that's the most requested because again you can mold that infant into who you need them to

00:06:09.680 be there you know my brother was still pretty similar to us even though i didn't meet him

00:06:15.360 no but but it's like working in like they let you know that like most people are going to go

00:06:19.760 for an infant right it's so harder to it's hard to place older kids because like you said they're

00:06:24.320 developing into whoever they are but it's still like if it's whoever it's still just get the kids

00:06:30.240 out of their kids don't ask to be here but i i think the better solution is for women to get married 1.00

00:06:35.920 and stay married because that's where we're seeing a lot of these there there there are a lot of when 0.53

00:06:41.520 men women are too picky that's the problem you have average overweight women the average woman's 170 1.00

00:06:46.800 pounds it's overweight fat and yet they think they deserve like men that make a lot of money 0.71

00:06:52.320 they they the average woman's had over over 10 partners there like this is based on different

00:06:56.800 studies average that which so they don't bring purity anymore they don't bring youth average bride is 31. 1.00

00:07:03.200 so 90 of your augs are gone by 31. yeah a woman's standards of course change when you're younger 1.00

00:07:08.160 you want this whole list when you get older you realize you need to chop that list down right

00:07:12.000 yeah because your value but there still has to be enough men for these women there has to be enough 0.99

00:07:17.680 men that fit the criteria for these women as far as again being one out of one out of three men are

00:07:23.360 either virgins or having had sex in the past year so they're single men but having sex doesn't mean

00:07:29.360 that you're not in a relationship look at ciara and russell wilson they didn't have sex though they 0.86

00:07:33.440 were didn't have russell didn't have sex they waited till marriage right that's fine thank you

00:07:38.080 but that's what i'm saying i just don't there's no excuses i just don't like the excuses

00:07:45.120 more teamwork less excuses the world will be a beautiful place yeah i'm saying like i think the

00:07:50.000 goal should be to get married and stay married i think that would solve a lot of these women want to get 1.00

00:07:54.560 married if men are not asking women no no i would say women women are women are the ones pushing off 1.00

00:07:59.200 marriage because men will always want young women they're biologically even just from a smell test 1.00

00:08:04.320 like men are biologically predisposition to like young fertile women so if when the men are looking

00:08:09.920 for wives the the young women don't want to get married because women have the most power when they're 1.00

00:08:15.280 young and we choose to not get married till we're older are young men looking for these young women or is

00:08:19.680 it older men looking for these younger women well you but you can't but you can't both yeah she's 0.98

00:08:23.760 right no no but you can you can always date older you have the most you have the most sexual power

00:08:30.240 when you are young as a woman but most women right when they're in a relationship and they're waiting 0.99

00:08:35.120 when when most women are in a relationship right and they're waiting for their man to ask them to 0.91

00:08:38.560 marry them what is the most common uh excuse i have to get myself together first i need to make sure

00:08:46.240 that's the woman's choice though because she could date older 0.99

00:08:49.200 when you are young you can date older and if you don't choose to that's exactly but at 25

00:08:54.960 are other 25 year old men ready to get married are they going to be happy so date 35 year old

00:09:01.360 but like i just can't but just it has to be like it's it's not excuses it's real life because then

00:09:07.280 more women but the problem is but but the question is okay if you have a product if you're a company and 1.00

00:09:13.680 you're selling a product and nobody's buying the product do you blame the customer or do you fix the

00:09:18.400 product you fix the product okay so why is it with men we'll blame them for not wanting to get married

00:09:25.440 instead of fixing the product which is humans but even if you fix yourself up even if you could be the

00:09:31.280 best woman there is if a man's not ready he's not ready you cannot make a man and i agree with you and i

00:09:37.040 agree with you but that goes back to our decision making we will stay with a guy for we'll pick a guy and

00:09:43.120 said i want i will make you into a husband when he is clearly not a husband and then complain about the

00:09:47.520 results it's true like like you said you dated a criminal yes like the criminal is not a husband

00:09:53.600 that's not husband material okay right right it might have been wrong so so but was he a criminal because

00:10:01.360 he was trying to make money to provide for the family if you're trying to make money to provide for the

00:10:05.200 family yes you had to take an illegal right but if that's all the work that there was around for you

00:10:09.120 like i can't make this up no but but this is real life this is real life we're not going off of

00:10:16.160 statistics everything i say is living in a real world okay okay but i'm saying so don't whine later

00:10:20.240 because what women will do is they'll date the the drug dealers the bad boys in our 20s and then come 1.00

00:10:25.840 in our 30s and say to the men oh please now i want the nice guy well but when you had the most

00:10:32.160 options and you had the most beauty the most youth the most purity you picked the bad guys and then you

00:10:37.360 want the nice guys to take you later but even if that's the but even if you pick the the the right

00:10:42.560 guys right when i was dating right i'm 37 now so when i was 25 there were men that i was dating

00:10:48.000 good jobs and i would be like yo i want to get married what was the response were you were you were

00:10:53.680 you a wife what was i wife yeah of course okay were you were you raised to be a wife yes i was raised

00:10:59.680 to be a wife okay so what what skills do you have that are like wife because the whole show you've

00:11:06.000 been talking about how you were raised to work which is fine i'm not i'm not even like judging you about

00:11:10.240 it but it's possible that maybe they just didn't see you as wife material i was raised so my mother 0.75

00:11:18.320 never worked okay so my mother taught instilled in me okay you have to cook for your husband okay i did

00:11:25.200 cook most of the family meals growing up you have to cook for your husband you have to make sure you

00:11:28.240 serve him first before you and your brother eat he will eat you have to clean the house so these are

00:11:33.840 things that i grow up doing but at the end of the day i still have to survive i have to take care of

00:11:37.440 myself right and there's nothing wrong with that and i'm not like i don't know your situation but

00:11:42.240 i'm saying like if if i'm trying to get married and all the men are saying no i don't want to marry

00:11:46.640 you no i don't want to marry you like maybe it's just something you got to fix like i'm not even

00:11:51.040 talking about you personally i'm just talking about women in general if the men don't want to marry us 0.96

00:11:55.440 it's like maybe we need to improve but women will blame the buyer instead of fixing the product 1.00

00:12:01.920 yeah but i think maybe women are actually it's kind of they're going for the wrong market 1.00

00:12:08.240 like that too all the women are throwing themselves at like a small minority and often players you know 1.00

00:12:15.680 they're really belligerent and how hot is that correct correct um you know whereas there would be plenty

00:12:22.560 of men who would be good husbands yeah but the biggest enough to go around but that still goes

00:12:28.640 with like that's the marketing right you know what i mean like it like instead of it being everybody

00:12:33.360 else like maybe we if yeah we're not if we're not yeah but it's like it's like the product is good

00:12:38.720 the marketing you know i mean the product isn't always good it's often suspect but even when the

00:12:44.800 product is good because for a while i was like why are the men upset but then i started reading

00:12:50.480 the numbers i was like god damn this doesn't make us but it's really hard when you think about it

00:12:57.040 right in my 20s it's not that a lot of men might say in your 20s it's not that most men are saying 0.70

00:13:01.840 i don't want to marry you not marriage material what they say is i'm not ready yet i need to build myself

00:13:08.320 i need to make sure i'm solid before i can now provide for a household because marriage is not no simple

00:13:13.280 thing it's a business contract you now we're going into business together so at a younger age

00:13:19.040 unless you decide to date older if you're going to date in your age range at 25 most men are going 0.59

00:13:24.240 to want to wait till they are established they have the money weddings are expensive marriage is 0.78

00:13:28.640 expensive and i agree with you but again that's trying to make a guy that's clearly not ready to

00:13:33.040 be a husband a husband sometimes if that's all you have to pick from no but it's not it's not

00:13:39.520 all you have to pick from sometimes that's what you have to pick from i don't know why you keep

00:13:43.280 like like it's not all you have to you know it's not all you have to pick from it's devil's advocate

00:13:46.320 we're having we're having a conversation we gotta you know off camera it might be a different story

00:13:52.080 yeah yeah but you know this is this is you know i'm always going to always think different i'm always

00:13:56.160 going to defend women i'll defend men too sometimes but i will always defend women because it is not 0.98

00:14:01.520 everybody is just privileged to certain situations so we have to we're going to speak about women

00:14:05.760 i want to say all women i want to i want to say women are all privileged we have we have female

00:14:12.080 privilege in the fact that we have boom boom you yes yes the world is kinder to us than men we do

00:14:18.880 have female privilege yes um can you read the super chats that have come in i can't read them because

00:14:24.640 my laptop died we're ready for the hate mail because you know it's going to be like that delusional girl 1.00

00:14:33.040 in the green yeah yeah let's bring it

JustPearlyThings - July 12, 2023

Modern Women Got SCHOOLED on ADOPTION

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