JustPearlyThings - Pearl On Losing Her Closest Friend

00:00:00.000 um so that let's talk about with friendship um as this happens to a lot of my clients has happened

00:00:07.400 to me a lot of people from my previous life my past life are like bro you've changed i remember

00:00:12.680 you used to be like this yeah right you had an incident happen with a previous friend where she

00:00:17.580 made some public comments about you uh you can go into what those comments were but how did that

00:00:21.580 affect you and like how were you able to deal with that oh yeah i was i was very surprised that she

00:00:28.120 did that to be honest um well she actually i stopped being friends with her like a while ago

00:00:34.660 so this wasn't like recent um and what happened was i was making some comments about fat chicks and i 0.99

00:00:42.180 was talking about how you shouldn't and i think this is basic like we shouldn't gain a bunch of

00:00:45.800 weight after you get married yeah like i think that's kind of like not being a good wife she had 1.00

00:00:50.700 gained a bunch of weight i hadn't seen her in a while it wasn't about her but the thing was like 0.81

00:00:55.280 she kept like trying to get me to like every time she'd watch my show and just be like oh you can't 1.00

00:01:00.480 say that you can't like because she was kind of feminist and um like and i was always fine like 0.99

00:01:05.700 that was kind of outside of our friendship you know um and we just you know before you could just like

00:01:09.840 talk about other stuff but once you go online like your friends see all your opinions and weird and

00:01:14.100 yeah and so she said she wanted to stop being my friends and it was weird because when i said okay fine

00:01:18.660 like you you you said this and then she got like really mad and what i realized is like women can kind of 0.98

00:01:24.140 be like spiteful and the problem is like with girls is they'll they'll kind of like take a half truth 0.98

00:01:29.900 and kind of spin i don't even i don't even remember what she said to be honest i just remember being

00:01:34.140 like well that wasn't really true you know i just remember like watching it and thinking but what i

00:01:39.680 realized is like i can't really control people and um yeah that was it was sad but because i was

00:01:46.580 friends with her for like 20 years one of the issues is that you went public with it and started making

00:01:51.260 content based on your relationship with her like showing old photos and stuff like that

00:01:55.520 oh i didn't do that no she did yeah she did yeah that's what i'm talking about yeah it's very it

00:02:00.840 reminds me very similar of like horrible situation with uh justin waller's mom i don't know if you

00:02:05.760 ever seen this thing but justin waller's mom starts like saying stuff that like clearly wasn't true 0.99

00:02:09.400 yeah about justin and i thought it was so lowbrow of like certain somebody to interview her when that

00:02:15.560 whole thing happened but it's one of these things where it's like you're not a content creator but

00:02:19.120 all of a sudden you're trying to become famous off this thing yeah well and yeah she was like oh

00:02:24.660 she's never had a boyfriend but i'm like what are you talking about i just have i don't know so i was

00:02:29.880 like what i don't know she was kind of nutty yeah but um i wasn't like crazy shocked because i i don't

00:02:36.700 know it was kind of a weird thing with her where i always felt like um how do i put it like i felt like

00:02:43.420 we were like closer when we were younger and like i don't know if you've ever had someone like from high

00:02:47.520 school where you your life just kind of gets like better and there's like doesn't so they kind of

00:02:51.940 like get out of shape i kind of i have 20 or 30 friends that went to jail for selling crack cocaine

00:02:55.800 oh gosh okay well she wasn't that bad but but it was it's just like i just feel like her life wasn't

00:03:01.900 really like going the way it wanted and i kind of felt this kind of drifting apart like a couple years

00:03:06.140 earlier and it's kind of a weird thing with women where you can kind of feel like i'm getting kind of 0.58

00:03:10.340 like jealous of you because you know i'm trying not to like say too much but i felt like like she

00:03:17.820 was always like my my pretty friend do you know i mean that she got kind of you know and i it's weird

00:03:22.860 i felt like our dynamics sort of like changed after that i don't know because i don't know but yeah

00:03:28.760 yeah i'm trying to not get in trouble yeah i don't know yeah no i understand i don't need another 10

00:03:32.760 videos made about me the thing that i think is interesting is is i want to make a statement

00:03:37.760 that it's not good for you to have a super high bmi it's difficult uh on your heart it's difficult

00:03:45.040 on your health it's difficult on your joints yeah if i make that statement that it's unhealthy to be

00:03:49.980 at that weight yeah that does not make me a misogynist that does not make me a fat shamer

00:03:56.240 i'm making a statement and i can show you evidence to base what i'm saying i also don't hate you

00:04:03.020 because i made that statement okay now uh you know nicole arbor you remember when 0.83

00:04:07.740 she said dear fat people have you ever seen that video she made i've heard of it yeah so nicole 0.98

00:04:11.560 nicole got sick of la just moved to fucking nashville because she was tired of yeah dealing 1.00

00:04:15.360 with all this shit uh nicole makes that video now she's being a little bit more satirical and she 1.00

00:04:20.720 attacks some people a little bit and at the end she's like hey fat people i love you that's why 0.98

00:04:25.000 i'm saying this yeah but it goes back to what we said before when i when i talked to the girls who

00:04:29.480 did only fans and i didn't say i hate you i didn't call you a name i just said here is a possible

00:04:33.900 consequence for your behavior than i was called a misogynist right when i go off and you say

00:04:39.720 something to the effect of it is not a good idea for you to weigh this much we haven't gotten into

00:04:43.660 the attraction part yeah i'm that doesn't make me a pig for saying that it's probably not a good 0.95

00:04:48.740 idea for you to weigh this much but what makes it even more insidious is this shit here so the 37 0.93

00:04:54.840 culture study done in 1989 by dr david buss where he looks at these 37 cultures they have nothing to do 0.96

00:05:00.240 with each other people from papaya new guinea yamomamo indians people from who live in the

00:05:04.800 andes they have no radio television or film and they looked for a small a per a certain hip to

00:05:10.640 waist ratio about 0.72 yeah hip to waist ratio in all of these cultures they look for signs of youth

00:05:16.000 and signs of fertility which means that uh beauty is not subjective it's actually objective you can

00:05:25.900 actually see there was this one study they've done they've done it several times before they do like a

00:05:30.020 psychology 101 course and they take everyone's picture they superimpose them all over each other

00:05:33.840 and they get the average of all the faces and that face is more attractive than anyone in the course

00:05:38.280 does that make sense because it's a symmetrical face so we know from that that beauty is subjective

00:05:42.980 and beauty is the subjectivity of i'm sorry beauty is objective and the objectivity of beauty is implanted

00:05:48.020 in us based on our genetics that's why when you have the discussion about whether or not men prefer

00:05:53.700 very obese women versus very skinny women this is not the argument i always hear is like no

00:05:59.300 cultures telling me to not accept women for being overweight and my response to that is no here is

00:06:05.320 unassailable proof of this study of 37 cultures that proves that's not the case and there's also

00:06:11.880 studies where they show like children stare at more attractive faces for longer which means this is

00:06:17.060 hardwired into our genetics my heterosexuality and my belief in like what i find attractive is not a

00:06:23.060 cultural construct it is genetic that is offensive to a lot of people the idea of that whole thing

00:06:29.160 happening that beauty is objective and not subjective well and the other thing that i we were talking

00:06:33.700 about on the podcast she got mad about was how like husbands are afraid to like say this to their

00:06:38.160 wives that they want them to lose weight and i just don't think that's fair like i really don't

00:06:42.020 think it's fair um and you know what else i realized through this whole thing i'm like people really

00:06:46.180 it doesn't matter like what you do for someone it's like if they feel spited like they're very 0.99

00:06:51.800 like there's no loyalty in a way uh like that girl like literally we'd let her stay with us in the

00:06:57.660 summers wow like for free i'm like but you know yeah but she could still have that opinion and then

00:07:02.080 not make tiktoks on it that's what i thought yeah or keep it between you and the other person yeah

00:07:06.580 yeah so um you know what's funny we you know talk about different aspects of masculinity one of the

00:07:12.600 aspects that doesn't get brought up enough is the concept of like standing behind your tribe

00:07:17.000 even when they're wrong right yeah so i agree like the rollo with the whole tweet with the mat

00:07:22.100 with the vasectomy thing all these people started attacking him and i'm like my first instance you

00:07:26.360 know kevin garnett obviously kevin garnett does this one interview and he says if one of my teammates

00:07:31.360 gets into a fight i'm jumping in on his side yeah i don't know what the fight's over but you put

00:07:36.340 your hands on my teammate we're fucking going down yeah when we get into the locker room privately i'm 0.96

00:07:40.740 going to ask you okay bro what happened why why did we get into a fight right when they go after 0.98

00:07:44.240 rollo rollo's my friend even if i don't agree with everything he said like i think he's too hard on

00:07:48.000 you even if i don't agree with everything rollo says he's still my friend i was going to defend him 0.98

00:07:52.380 no matter what then when we talk about it's like oh i actually agree with you this is stupid 0.98

00:07:55.480 obviously he didn't actually mean vasectomy he was just saying this to be hyperbolic 0.97

00:07:58.740 and it's one of those situations where we another example uh the guys i understood the tweet yeah i

00:08:06.000 agreed with him yeah like with rollo like um i mean i don't i understood what he was saying he was

00:08:11.660 talking about it's the fastest way the fastest the quickest way yeah and the only foolproof way

00:08:16.000 really is a vasectomy like yeah i'm not saying do it but i understood it was the 10 out of 10 0.93

00:08:20.280 like 10 out of 10 idiot proof way of doing it that's what he was saying yeah and i understood what 0.51

00:08:25.540 like i was like i'm on your side but it's okay yeah people people just like took it out of context 0.99

00:08:30.740 and then we had a long debate about it yeah the thing is in the end he won because

00:08:34.220 like ben shapiro's not talking about me right she's not talking about me correct you know

00:08:39.240 yeah yeah in the end he did win yeah um so but i thought it was interesting when men stand up for

00:08:46.140 their friends or for their tribe and then in this case you have a woman who was part of your tribe 0.93

00:08:50.640 and she doesn't she just sells you up the fucking river i think it's masculine to stand behind your 1.00

00:08:54.720 friends even when they're wrong but then to privately let them know hey bro this is what we should be 0.99

00:08:58.380 doing different and i and what i'm seeing instead though is a lot of very unmasculine men

00:09:02.840 going off and selling out their friends snitching on their friends trying to steal your girlfriend

00:09:07.240 behind your back that seems to be more of the case one of the funny things that happens to me is

00:09:11.560 because we said before i have a ton of female friends when my guy friends go to my female 1.00

00:09:15.180 friends and they start running their mouth about me i find out about it immediately i'm like bro you're

00:09:19.480 a snitch you understand what i'm saying that's so true guys will run their mouths yeah run they'll run

00:09:24.000 their mouth like i the amount of information i'm like george tenet bro i got so much cia information

00:09:28.760 yeah and they don't realize that because they run their mouth to these girls and they think the 1.00

00:09:32.440 girls are going to be loyal to them and that's not the way it works right when you're not loyal as a 1.00

00:09:36.380 dude to me that's like worse than anything that's why i never you'll never even people that i don't

00:09:41.560 like you won't hear me talking bad about them behind their back because it's passive aggressive you know

00:09:45.000 you know that happened to me with the co-host right like i had a co oh i had a co-host that like

00:09:49.500 came out and said i was a colonizer yeah you didn't hear about that yeah specifically like

00:09:54.960 colonizer like the imperialist yeah i guess okay yeah i guess you know blessings here against his

00:10:00.500 free will apparently oh right yeah that's funny no but it's yeah it's it's crazy it's crazy the social

00:10:08.560 media just like changes social dynamics because there's like money and throwing people under the

00:10:12.720 bus correct so that and so my point is it's not feminine but it's non-masculine to throw your

00:10:17.900 friends under the bus yes that's like it is masculine to go to jail for your homie and not 0.98

00:10:22.120 snitch that is masculine that the reason why it's masculine is because your ancestors were willing to

00:10:28.460 die for the tribe that is masculinity the ultimate form of masculinity is willing to die for your tribe

00:10:35.500 right okay the ultimate form of not i'm not gonna call femininity i'm gonna call it non-masculinity 0.56

00:10:39.800 the ultimate form of non-masculinity is willing to snitch on your homies steal his girl does that 0.94

00:10:45.980 make sense yeah because i'm thinking like that's how do they get to the men they would always like

00:10:49.780 like bring a woman and you know what i mean like like have the girl sleep yeah that's what that's 1.00

00:10:53.640 what happened with um petraeus general petraeus was the head of the cia and he had to step down

00:10:57.440 because he was cheating on his wife with a reporter well once like a foreign service agencies

00:11:01.200 i'm so genius i'm sorry yeah once foreign service agencies find out that you're cheating on your

00:11:05.420 wife they can use it to blackmail you sound like a nine yeah as many of you know i was just

00:11:10.720 banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform if you want

00:11:17.780 to help please consider sending a super thanks below every donation helps and it helps make

00:11:23.560 make what we do possible

00:11:25.620 make what we do possible

00:11:25.700 make what we do possible

JustPearlyThings - May 25, 2023

Pearl On Losing Her Closest Friend

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript