JustPearlyThings - May 25, 2023


Pearl On Losing Her Closest Friend

Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
You Won't BELIEVE What This Cornstar Said About Her BoyFriend Pearl Wants This From Her Dream Man

Episode Stats


Length

11 minutes

Words per minute

230.97

Word count

2,640

Sentence count

—

Harmful content

Misogyny

16

sentences flagged

Toxicity

18

sentences flagged

Hate speech

12

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of the podcast, I sit down with a good friend of mine to talk about friendships, family, and what it means to be a woman in today's society. We talk about what it's like to grow up in a toxic environment and how to deal with it.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 um so that let's talk about with friendship um as this happens to a lot of my clients has happened
00:00:07.400 to me a lot of people from my previous life my past life are like bro you've changed i remember
00:00:12.680 you used to be like this yeah right you had an incident happen with a previous friend where she
00:00:17.580 made some public comments about you uh you can go into what those comments were but how did that
00:00:21.580 affect you and like how were you able to deal with that oh yeah i was i was very surprised that she
00:00:28.120 did that to be honest um well she actually i stopped being friends with her like a while ago
00:00:34.660 so this wasn't like recent um and what happened was i was making some comments about fat chicks and i 0.99
00:00:42.180 was talking about how you shouldn't and i think this is basic like we shouldn't gain a bunch of
00:00:45.800 weight after you get married yeah like i think that's kind of like not being a good wife she had 1.00
00:00:50.700 gained a bunch of weight i hadn't seen her in a while it wasn't about her but the thing was like 0.81
00:00:55.280 she kept like trying to get me to like every time she'd watch my show and just be like oh you can't 1.00
00:01:00.480 say that you can't like because she was kind of feminist and um like and i was always fine like 0.99
00:01:05.700 that was kind of outside of our friendship you know um and we just you know before you could just like
00:01:09.840 talk about other stuff but once you go online like your friends see all your opinions and weird and
00:01:14.100 yeah and so she said she wanted to stop being my friends and it was weird because when i said okay fine
00:01:18.660 like you you you said this and then she got like really mad and what i realized is like women can kind of 0.98
00:01:24.140 be like spiteful and the problem is like with girls is they'll they'll kind of like take a half truth 0.98
00:01:29.900 and kind of spin i don't even i don't even remember what she said to be honest i just remember being
00:01:34.140 like well that wasn't really true you know i just remember like watching it and thinking but what i
00:01:39.680 realized is like i can't really control people and um yeah that was it was sad but because i was
00:01:46.580 friends with her for like 20 years one of the issues is that you went public with it and started making
00:01:51.260 content based on your relationship with her like showing old photos and stuff like that
00:01:55.520 oh i didn't do that no she did yeah she did yeah that's what i'm talking about yeah it's very it
00:02:00.840 reminds me very similar of like horrible situation with uh justin waller's mom i don't know if you
00:02:05.760 ever seen this thing but justin waller's mom starts like saying stuff that like clearly wasn't true 0.99
00:02:09.400 yeah about justin and i thought it was so lowbrow of like certain somebody to interview her when that
00:02:15.560 whole thing happened but it's one of these things where it's like you're not a content creator but
00:02:19.120 all of a sudden you're trying to become famous off this thing yeah well and yeah she was like oh
00:02:24.660 she's never had a boyfriend but i'm like what are you talking about i just have i don't know so i was
00:02:29.880 like what i don't know she was kind of nutty yeah but um i wasn't like crazy shocked because i i don't
00:02:36.700 know it was kind of a weird thing with her where i always felt like um how do i put it like i felt like
00:02:43.420 we were like closer when we were younger and like i don't know if you've ever had someone like from high
00:02:47.520 school where you your life just kind of gets like better and there's like doesn't so they kind of
00:02:51.940 like get out of shape i kind of i have 20 or 30 friends that went to jail for selling crack cocaine
00:02:55.800 oh gosh okay well she wasn't that bad but but it was it's just like i just feel like her life wasn't
00:03:01.900 really like going the way it wanted and i kind of felt this kind of drifting apart like a couple years
00:03:06.140 earlier and it's kind of a weird thing with women where you can kind of feel like i'm getting kind of 0.58
00:03:10.340 like jealous of you because you know i'm trying not to like say too much but i felt like like she
00:03:17.820 was always like my my pretty friend do you know i mean that she got kind of you know and i it's weird
00:03:22.860 i felt like our dynamics sort of like changed after that i don't know because i don't know but yeah
00:03:28.760 yeah i'm trying to not get in trouble yeah i don't know yeah no i understand i don't need another 10
00:03:32.760 videos made about me the thing that i think is interesting is is i want to make a statement
00:03:37.760 that it's not good for you to have a super high bmi it's difficult uh on your heart it's difficult
00:03:45.040 on your health it's difficult on your joints yeah if i make that statement that it's unhealthy to be
00:03:49.980 at that weight yeah that does not make me a misogynist that does not make me a fat shamer
00:03:56.240 i'm making a statement and i can show you evidence to base what i'm saying i also don't hate you
00:04:03.020 because i made that statement okay now uh you know nicole arbor you remember when 0.83
00:04:07.740 she said dear fat people have you ever seen that video she made i've heard of it yeah so nicole 0.98
00:04:11.560 nicole got sick of la just moved to fucking nashville because she was tired of yeah dealing 1.00
00:04:15.360 with all this shit uh nicole makes that video now she's being a little bit more satirical and she 1.00
00:04:20.720 attacks some people a little bit and at the end she's like hey fat people i love you that's why 0.98
00:04:25.000 i'm saying this yeah but it goes back to what we said before when i when i talked to the girls who
00:04:29.480 did only fans and i didn't say i hate you i didn't call you a name i just said here is a possible
00:04:33.900 consequence for your behavior than i was called a misogynist right when i go off and you say
00:04:39.720 something to the effect of it is not a good idea for you to weigh this much we haven't gotten into
00:04:43.660 the attraction part yeah i'm that doesn't make me a pig for saying that it's probably not a good 0.95
00:04:48.740 idea for you to weigh this much but what makes it even more insidious is this shit here so the 37 0.93
00:04:54.840 culture study done in 1989 by dr david buss where he looks at these 37 cultures they have nothing to do 0.96
00:05:00.240 with each other people from papaya new guinea yamomamo indians people from who live in the
00:05:04.800 andes they have no radio television or film and they looked for a small a per a certain hip to
00:05:10.640 waist ratio about 0.72 yeah hip to waist ratio in all of these cultures they look for signs of youth
00:05:16.000 and signs of fertility which means that uh beauty is not subjective it's actually objective you can
00:05:25.900 actually see there was this one study they've done they've done it several times before they do like a
00:05:30.020 psychology 101 course and they take everyone's picture they superimpose them all over each other
00:05:33.840 and they get the average of all the faces and that face is more attractive than anyone in the course
00:05:38.280 does that make sense because it's a symmetrical face so we know from that that beauty is subjective
00:05:42.980 and beauty is the subjectivity of i'm sorry beauty is objective and the objectivity of beauty is implanted
00:05:48.020 in us based on our genetics that's why when you have the discussion about whether or not men prefer
00:05:53.700 very obese women versus very skinny women this is not the argument i always hear is like no
00:05:59.300 cultures telling me to not accept women for being overweight and my response to that is no here is
00:06:05.320 unassailable proof of this study of 37 cultures that proves that's not the case and there's also
00:06:11.880 studies where they show like children stare at more attractive faces for longer which means this is
00:06:17.060 hardwired into our genetics my heterosexuality and my belief in like what i find attractive is not a
00:06:23.060 cultural construct it is genetic that is offensive to a lot of people the idea of that whole thing
00:06:29.160 happening that beauty is objective and not subjective well and the other thing that i we were talking
00:06:33.700 about on the podcast she got mad about was how like husbands are afraid to like say this to their
00:06:38.160 wives that they want them to lose weight and i just don't think that's fair like i really don't
00:06:42.020 think it's fair um and you know what else i realized through this whole thing i'm like people really
00:06:46.180 it doesn't matter like what you do for someone it's like if they feel spited like they're very 0.99
00:06:51.800 like there's no loyalty in a way uh like that girl like literally we'd let her stay with us in the
00:06:57.660 summers wow like for free i'm like but you know yeah but she could still have that opinion and then
00:07:02.080 not make tiktoks on it that's what i thought yeah or keep it between you and the other person yeah
00:07:06.580 yeah so um you know what's funny we you know talk about different aspects of masculinity one of the
00:07:12.600 aspects that doesn't get brought up enough is the concept of like standing behind your tribe
00:07:17.000 even when they're wrong right yeah so i agree like the rollo with the whole tweet with the mat
00:07:22.100 with the vasectomy thing all these people started attacking him and i'm like my first instance you
00:07:26.360 know kevin garnett obviously kevin garnett does this one interview and he says if one of my teammates
00:07:31.360 gets into a fight i'm jumping in on his side yeah i don't know what the fight's over but you put
00:07:36.340 your hands on my teammate we're fucking going down yeah when we get into the locker room privately i'm 0.96
00:07:40.740 going to ask you okay bro what happened why why did we get into a fight right when they go after 0.98
00:07:44.240 rollo rollo's my friend even if i don't agree with everything he said like i think he's too hard on
00:07:48.000 you even if i don't agree with everything rollo says he's still my friend i was going to defend him 0.98
00:07:52.380 no matter what then when we talk about it's like oh i actually agree with you this is stupid 0.98
00:07:55.480 obviously he didn't actually mean vasectomy he was just saying this to be hyperbolic 0.97
00:07:58.740 and it's one of those situations where we another example uh the guys i understood the tweet yeah i
00:08:06.000 agreed with him yeah like with rollo like um i mean i don't i understood what he was saying he was
00:08:11.660 talking about it's the fastest way the fastest the quickest way yeah and the only foolproof way
00:08:16.000 really is a vasectomy like yeah i'm not saying do it but i understood it was the 10 out of 10 0.93
00:08:20.280 like 10 out of 10 idiot proof way of doing it that's what he was saying yeah and i understood what 0.51
00:08:25.540 like i was like i'm on your side but it's okay yeah people people just like took it out of context 0.99
00:08:30.740 and then we had a long debate about it yeah the thing is in the end he won because
00:08:34.220 like ben shapiro's not talking about me right she's not talking about me correct you know
00:08:39.240 yeah yeah in the end he did win yeah um so but i thought it was interesting when men stand up for
00:08:46.140 their friends or for their tribe and then in this case you have a woman who was part of your tribe 0.93
00:08:50.640 and she doesn't she just sells you up the fucking river i think it's masculine to stand behind your 1.00
00:08:54.720 friends even when they're wrong but then to privately let them know hey bro this is what we should be 0.99
00:08:58.380 doing different and i and what i'm seeing instead though is a lot of very unmasculine men
00:09:02.840 going off and selling out their friends snitching on their friends trying to steal your girlfriend
00:09:07.240 behind your back that seems to be more of the case one of the funny things that happens to me is
00:09:11.560 because we said before i have a ton of female friends when my guy friends go to my female 1.00
00:09:15.180 friends and they start running their mouth about me i find out about it immediately i'm like bro you're
00:09:19.480 a snitch you understand what i'm saying that's so true guys will run their mouths yeah run they'll run
00:09:24.000 their mouth like i the amount of information i'm like george tenet bro i got so much cia information
00:09:28.760 yeah and they don't realize that because they run their mouth to these girls and they think the 1.00
00:09:32.440 girls are going to be loyal to them and that's not the way it works right when you're not loyal as a 1.00
00:09:36.380 dude to me that's like worse than anything that's why i never you'll never even people that i don't
00:09:41.560 like you won't hear me talking bad about them behind their back because it's passive aggressive you know
00:09:45.000 you know that happened to me with the co-host right like i had a co oh i had a co-host that like
00:09:49.500 came out and said i was a colonizer yeah you didn't hear about that yeah specifically like
00:09:54.960 colonizer like the imperialist yeah i guess okay yeah i guess you know blessings here against his
00:10:00.500 free will apparently oh right yeah that's funny no but it's yeah it's it's crazy it's crazy the social
00:10:08.560 media just like changes social dynamics because there's like money and throwing people under the
00:10:12.720 bus correct so that and so my point is it's not feminine but it's non-masculine to throw your
00:10:17.900 friends under the bus yes that's like it is masculine to go to jail for your homie and not 0.98
00:10:22.120 snitch that is masculine that the reason why it's masculine is because your ancestors were willing to
00:10:28.460 die for the tribe that is masculinity the ultimate form of masculinity is willing to die for your tribe
00:10:35.500 right okay the ultimate form of not i'm not gonna call femininity i'm gonna call it non-masculinity 0.56
00:10:39.800 the ultimate form of non-masculinity is willing to snitch on your homies steal his girl does that 0.94
00:10:45.980 make sense yeah because i'm thinking like that's how do they get to the men they would always like
00:10:49.780 like bring a woman and you know what i mean like like have the girl sleep yeah that's what that's 1.00
00:10:53.640 what happened with um petraeus general petraeus was the head of the cia and he had to step down
00:10:57.440 because he was cheating on his wife with a reporter well once like a foreign service agencies
00:11:01.200 i'm so genius i'm sorry yeah once foreign service agencies find out that you're cheating on your
00:11:05.420 wife they can use it to blackmail you sound like a nine yeah as many of you know i was just
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