She Admits This SHOCKING TRUTH About Herself
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
195.93614
Summary
In this episode, we have our first guest on the show, Efe, who talks about her experience growing up in a multi-cultural family. She talks about growing up as a single mom and how she dealt with the pressures of being raised in a religious and cultural environment.
Transcript
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what what was the most surprising thing you've learned from like you learned from the show
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yesterday i think it was that statistic i can't remember which one it was now so
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it's not much use but um definitely i think it was like the oh the percentage of men that are
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over six foot tall is only 15 percent it's really shocking it kind of makes sense though when you
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think about it yeah like because women are always saying like men are trash yeah and all that you
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know it's like oh they always think they're dogs yeah we're the ones yeah literally yeah that
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definitely and it was also good to hear other people's views like a few um a few things did
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actually change my perspective on things men are actually simple creatures i was saying this
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earlier they don't need a lot what do you think of blessing when he like came in and was like asking
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the questions what do you guys think no i think it was good to have a men's perspective i actually do
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because we didn't have any other obviously there was no men on the panel and it's good to hear from
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the actual male point of view i understood his perspective but i don't necessarily fully agree
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with it what do you not agree with i don't agree with the fact that if i have something to say i
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should be like just i get the submissive part but i just don't think it's like right for me not to
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have a voice or not to have a say yeah yeah but it's understandable i understand but you know i do
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think though i think the point he was trying to get across is if you're with someone and you're
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married you guys have the same views you're not going to really disagree on or you you should
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right yeah you should there's not going to be much disagreement there because if you disagree on
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everything or you question everything then you guys aren't really compatible i was curious what was
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it like growing up in a multi like were your parents religious or they weren't religious my mom
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was religious my dad was kind of religious i mean he wasn't really yeah he was he was just like
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open the quran close it because just give them a background your your mom is what and your dad is
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what so my mom's nigerian and my dad is from iran so he grew up as a muslim and a bit spiritual as
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well and my mom grew up as a christian and spiritual as well so they had like yeah both of those but my mom
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has always been really open-minded to other religions so has my dad and that's why i feel like they
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that was already yeah that was already like an open gate for them to get to know each other
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um i moved around a lot countries wise so i was born in germany oh shut up yeah
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but i also lived in nigeria and that was a complete switch of like scenario and environment and it was
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you looked in nigeria for eight years really wow so how old were you when you moved um i was eight
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years old and i left when i was 14 or 16 no way do you think that was good for you as a kid no no
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very traumatic yeah extremely just chaos but i don't blame anyone for that i feel like i just need to
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learn and grow yeah i guess because you're moving around so much you have to like leave all your friends
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and when you're younger you're not you have to like re-adapt and like build new friends then you
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you're a complete different country you kind of lose those connections exactly so it's like starting
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fresh each time it's a lot when you're younger because you obviously when your friends mean so
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much to you when you're younger when you're older you can kind of pick up exactly 14 where'd you go
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from 14 here i'm here yeah wow she lived in three wow that is so insane crazy how many siblings did
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you have three sisters was it easier because you had the sisters at least oh they made they made life
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so much easier okay keeping up with the kardashian was like a religious thing for us
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like every i think saturday or friday or whatever it was we would like come together as a family and
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watch it together just for the sake of like having that family time not even paying attention to what
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we was watching just having that closeness was very important so i can't imagine doing that as like
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an only child or like two kids like at least i i came from a big family i had nine siblings total so
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it was a lot of us but i'm like i can't imagine three countries no siblings yes that would be crazy
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it's a huge culture shock as well because yeah i'm a big family person out of all of my sisters my mom
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i'm the biggest like i'm the most attached to my family and so what country was your favorite to live
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in germany because i don't remember a lot yeah and i still had my dad around there but as we moved to
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nigeria things just got absolutely just horrible wait your dad wasn't around in nigeria he he did come
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but he was like in and out of prison he was just like affiliated with gangs your dad was in prison yeah
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oh my gosh he was like a mafia you should write a book is he still right where's he now oh you don't
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know he just vanished disappeared off the face of the earth literally yeah crazy do you think that's
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affected like your dating and relationships and your ability to like understand them it's affected
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everything i know to be humane because i i i always try to put myself in people's
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position and just like see things from people's point of view um obviously with my mom i grew up
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very much with her like from what i remember it was all my mom my mom was my dad my mom was my mom
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my mom was my grandpa my mom was my grandma so she filled in that role but emotionally i don't think
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she was there a lot it was more like work keep the kids safe work keep the kids safe so because
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just listening to your stories i kind of sense that maybe there wasn't a dad in the picture
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just because like when you're describing your ex i'm like there's no way a dad would let that happen
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honestly there's no way this is craziness yeah yeah you're right yeah i definitely think having a
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father figure there present has a huge impact on the type of men you go for
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mm-hmm 100 especially when you see how your dad treats your mom yeah has a huge impact on how
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what you accept as in the dating because you're especially you you're naturally very feminine
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like because some girls come on and they like act like dudes but you're not like that you act like
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pretty feminine and that's because i've not had a voice for so long yeah i was i was so quiet i was
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anxious i was scared of everything and anything because of how much trauma i had been through in
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my life so i felt like everywhere i went was like a danger zone like i have to be on guard
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the screen recording isn't the audio like the audio is picking us up but we can't do the screen
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yeah like when we play the video we can't hear it in the headphones
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but it ended up happening because my dad didn't want to go
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it's crazy my life would have been completely different
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could you while you're here could you switch the thumbnail
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i thought i was gonna have a holiday on the question i do but it turns out
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so yeah and he got picked out of school that i knew
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because he chased um he chased the boy around the school with a stick on fire
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and they were like oh we're sending you a holiday
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he got sent to nigeria so he's been on holiday and then left him there
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i mean i'll go because you guys have had like a more of a conversation live so
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and actually i was like i think men would actually like
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but i'm like why do you market like this is like horror nails
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well i don't get my nails done very often and i was i went to germany recently to visit my sister
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and so i was like you know what i'm just trying
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yeah you came in today you look like a different person
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actually i love it i love it i love to just i don't know just don't expect anything from me