JustPearlyThings - November 07, 2023


She CONFESSED Why She's Out of Favor with Men in Dating Market


Episode Stats

Length

34 minutes

Words per Minute

199.80751

Word Count

6,851

Sentence Count

26

Misogynist Sentences

18

Hate Speech Sentences

23


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 If you have all these complaints about him what what's resonating with him really analyzing what you're doing
00:00:05.120 That's what I would suggest. So why don't because in my head like
00:00:10.320 Why wouldn't you avoid this if you could go back you wouldn't avoid the situations
00:00:14.760 Because you I thought in the beginning you said that like you wouldn't change it because of the wisdom you've acquired
00:00:21.180 But to me, it's like oh my god if I if I knew what I know now
00:00:24.560 Like I probably would have waited till I was married. No, I can I I get that I understand that
00:00:29.760 I think that I
00:00:31.760 Have a very influential voice and I have grown to be a voice for women who have gone through what I've gone through and experience what I've experienced and
00:00:41.520 Although I again, I can't speak for the majority because my situation still isn't even average, right?
00:00:46.320 and I'm aware of that, but
00:00:48.640 My voice is important just like your voice is important. And that's why I don't I would not want to change anything because
00:00:55.520 what again, I don't know what my
00:00:57.520 This is a very tough spot to be in right because you're figuring it out
00:01:02.800 You have people who are also trying to figure it out and it's like I'm needed in this space
00:01:09.040 Because I my voice guides those women that you guys talk about right?
00:01:13.920 So that's why I wouldn't change it because there's a greater picture even in my like I told you my last relationship
00:01:18.960 I had the Bentley had the house had the kid
00:01:21.360 And it wasn't enough. Okay, so it may be a small percentage of us women who feel this way
00:01:27.520 But those I feel like that's the voice that I'm I represent. Oh, no. Oh, you know, there's a large percentage of okay. Okay. Well, I mean
00:01:35.520 I don't know
00:01:37.520 They're predicting that 45% of women will be single and childless by 2030
00:01:42.560 So much so that big banks are investing in like cat food wine like things that go with like single women. Well, yeah
00:01:49.600 Okay, well
00:01:51.200 I feel like my voice does matter so now to navigate through this so so it's like
00:01:57.680 It's like again, it's such a small percentage of men that you're like looking for now. I know yeah
00:02:03.760 How do you want to navigate that like moving forward?
00:02:08.720 Um, do you even want a date like right now because you you um
00:02:13.680 So I know some people when their kids are young like just don't want to date. How do you like feel about that?
00:02:21.040 Um, I think it has more to do with
00:02:25.600 Where I'm at
00:02:27.920 emotionally and
00:02:29.920 It's not even like a jaded thing, right? It's more of I
00:02:34.640 Know my value I
00:02:36.800 Can talk to I can have one conversation with a guy now
00:02:40.080 And I know exactly what he's about
00:02:42.720 So most of the guys that have presented themselves in front of me just want to fuck me
00:02:47.600 I'm not interested in that and
00:02:50.160 I'm going to keep my I'm going to keep an open mind and I'm going to keep an open heart
00:02:54.320 But I know
00:02:55.520 By how a man approaches me how he speaks to me. I know that there's that that he wants more with me
00:03:01.760 It is just I know
00:03:04.160 So that's where I'm like, I'm not going on dates right now. I'm not talking
00:03:09.040 I don't have somebody that we talk every few days every day
00:03:12.320 I have no masculine energy besides like my family our family friend Jerry
00:03:16.720 Um, I have no masculine energy
00:03:19.520 In my in my in my sphere in my bubble. I don't because I think
00:03:24.080 I've focused on men and just dick in general for a very long time
00:03:28.560 And now i'm i'm just going to get to the business
00:03:31.360 I understand that the window the percentage it's it's it's changed a lot from when I was 22
00:03:37.360 So all I can do is kind of equip myself financially take advantage of the opportunities
00:03:41.600 I have now to set myself up because I can't rely on
00:03:47.440 A man and come someone coming to save me. I can only save myself now
00:03:51.040 So that's why i've dating is not a focal point
00:03:54.320 But i'm not like turning guys
00:03:56.320 Away that that actually want to get to know me like the real me not
00:04:01.200 Just want to fuck me and say all the right things and fuck me because I can see through that too
00:04:04.800 So I just use discernment now where i'm like
00:04:08.160 No guys even really try to talk to me like or I should say um
00:04:12.240 No guys that
00:04:14.240 No, no, no of course of course guys no, no, no, no
00:04:16.000 I'm saying of course those guys in my dm like random people yeah, but guys that I would be interested in they
00:04:21.280 There's really nobody trying to talk to me like that and that's okay
00:04:24.720 That's fine. Would you date a guy that's a normal nine? Okay, would you date a guy?
00:04:30.240 Makes 40 000 per year and he's not hot. He's just like all right
00:04:36.160 average guy
00:04:38.320 Average guy is a little a little beer. He's like skinny you know little beer belly
00:04:44.480 No, no, I take care of myself. I'm in the gym four to five times a week
00:04:49.680 At whatever his salary is to me. I feel like I still want to be attracted to the person that i'm with and
00:04:56.160 45 000 you could be in the gym gym memberships 20 a month
00:04:59.040 So if i'm again, I had a kid a year and a half ago. I look damn good
00:05:03.440 So it's like I would want someone who takes care of their body
00:05:06.400 So the the beer belly is not where you lost me. It wasn't even really the money thing
00:05:10.720 It's like the attractiveness
00:05:12.000 Like dead in the face, but jacked
00:05:15.120 40 000 a year
00:05:17.440 No, I don't like what i'm looking at and then like especially too as they get older like I like the salt and pepper
00:05:24.240 Like they get sexier like I don't want to date someone that i'm not attracted to
00:05:28.240 Would you date someone like 20 30 years older?
00:05:31.600 30 years older
00:05:33.600 He's salt and pepper and fine probably he's okay
00:05:42.720 It's just like even when girls say they're like breaking down their standards like do we really?
00:05:48.480 I think i i think i'm like you know percent of men most women find unattractive what
00:05:55.120 Not not just okay unattractive okay 80 you you probably find 80 percent of men unattractive
00:06:00.960 So even if like just and that's why i say like even if you find a guy attractive like you just think he's fine
00:06:06.640 That means other girls think he's fine that's top 20 percent of men
00:06:10.800 And again and it kind of just puts us in the same predicament where it's like
00:06:15.200 Through our 20s like this this is what the guys are complaining about it's like okay through our 20s
00:06:19.520 We're gonna sleep around with the the rappers the entertainers and maybe like you know most girls
00:06:24.960 I would say i know the manosphere says differently don't don't have access to the guys you would access to right
00:06:29.600 But it could be like the town rapper the town like whatever it was right yeah
00:06:34.640 And those guys will never commit and if they do commit they'll probably cheat and then we come at 30 and say
00:06:41.200 Take me now maybe with the kid from someone yeah, and it's like the guy comes in and feels like he's like settled for
00:06:48.000 Because the guys you really wanted were in your 20s
00:06:50.880 And it's kind of like what you're saying is kind of reiterating this because you just said now
00:06:54.640 Like you don't have the guys you want in your dms anymore correct, but this is how it's meant to be because a lot of people have
00:07:02.880 Villainized me and i've played into that actually i'm gonna say people have villainized me
00:07:06.480 And i have villainized myself because it's like well instead of fighting against it and you know
00:07:11.520 Uh, i don't know trying to convince people i'm actually a good-hearted person it's easier to just be the villain
00:07:16.560 um so i do feel like the villain element is a lot of i would say more so what guys fear right because they're thinking she's gonna hurt me
00:07:24.560 She's gonna write about me she's gonna this um
00:07:27.040 So to be honest
00:07:28.560 I wasn't meant to be with any of those guys in my 20s like
00:07:32.640 There it wasn't a match like there's nobody then that i'm like i wish they would take me seriously now
00:07:38.560 No like they i like them the same reason they like me i'm trophy to them and they're basically trophy dick to me
00:07:46.080 We both got what we wanted i mean essentially we want to have sex that worked i mean yeah
00:07:50.560 You have sex and you maybe want to start being in a relationship but you don't i didn't fucking know them like that
00:07:55.360 There's a lot of guys i didn't really know on that level to even it makes sense so
00:08:00.320 It's not even like you were saying um
00:08:03.680 I'm trying to think of the sentence you said before we started this conversation though this this topic um
00:08:09.440 So it's not even that i'm like oh i wish i had those options it's just more so like that was shallow anyways
00:08:16.000 Everything was shallow about it like you didn't really want to get to know me from me
00:08:20.720 Yeah, but that's like that's like the woman's point of view you know what i mean like but they didn't want to get if they wanted to get to know
00:08:25.760 me from me
00:08:28.320 It would have been a little different no i'm saying like from the men's point of view it's going to be and this is just
00:08:33.040 You know again what the guys are saying yeah
00:08:35.680 But it's like yeah you made all those like you let all those guys hit for free and now i got to do all this
00:08:41.680 Well it's not even i don't even look at it as well you did it for free because i'm not a prostitute like and i'm not a glorified
00:08:46.560 Right and that's that might not be how you look at it but this is that's crazy this is this is just like
00:08:51.600 This is how men see it it's like yeah it's like okay
00:08:55.200 blessing
00:08:58.880 You have you you took your girl on dates right
00:09:02.160 Yeah, how would you feel how would you feel if you took her on let's say five dates before you hit i don't know
00:09:08.880 what y'all did i'm not and then you found out that your bob down the street
00:09:14.480 Hit without taking her on shit
00:09:18.000 Like it hurts it's like it hurts a man's ego no that's fine and it hurts it's not even it's not
00:09:22.320 Insecurity either it's just like no i mean but that's where i have to come in and say
00:09:29.040 Okay like i'm not saying your ego shouldn't be hurt i'm saying you're not somebody that
00:09:34.640 Is even like we're not on each other's radar so the man that i want can't can't care about who the
00:09:43.200 Fuck i went on it who i did what with and that's a small percentage so that's why it's like him him
00:09:48.400 Saying that he's allowed to feel that way i mean that's fine like you're not on my radar
00:09:53.440 i think the point is like all men think like this
00:09:56.080 I i'm not going to generalize all i just can't like we can say majority but i'm not going to generalize and say all
00:10:02.400 Because it's like what my biggest issue is is like once you hit a certain age you're no good
00:10:08.800 Okay so so women we get where we hit 30 and we're basically useless to society
00:10:14.400 Okay to most men that's how they're going to feel that our life still has to go on
00:10:18.160 I would say not most men don't feel that way it's again we it's the men that we want that feel
00:10:24.240 That way because those men have options
00:10:26.800 80 percent of men women find unattractive
00:10:30.160 Those men will date 30 year olds they'll date single mothers they'll do all of it
00:10:35.200 It's it's the 20 percent of men that we want when they say
00:10:38.400 Okay single mom or no single mom i'm going to pick no single mom because it's just less headache
00:10:43.440 If i could pick a 22 year old or a 32 year old i'm going to pick a 22 year old
00:10:46.800 It's not it's not to say nobody gets through but just like on a balance of probabilities
00:10:51.440 No and that's fine i just think and i think i think the men sometimes get frustrated with us because
00:10:56.480 They feel like we've been sold this fairy tale that's just not real and these men are not real
00:11:02.320 Like to them and that's that's where they come in and say like women are delusional for like wanting these things
00:11:08.240 i mean and from their perspective that's valid that i don't have to
00:11:12.400 like if that's how however whatever percentage men you want to say that's how they feel you're saying all
00:11:19.200 i'm saying i'm not i'm not going to categorize i don't think all i'll give you i'll give you five
00:11:23.760 percent okay five percent okay well then i'm only concerned about the five like i i have no like
00:11:28.480 i'm not i'm not jehovah's witness i'm not here to convert you guys shouldn't think this way about
00:11:33.360 me you should see me as this see my value i don't i don't know i'm not saying like there's nothing you
00:11:37.920 can do yeah it just is what it is you're where you're at you can't undo the men you slept with
00:11:42.480 yeah and i don't want to it just is what it is you you you have you have a child so you can't undo any
00:11:47.680 of that there's no point in harping about it and i think that's the point you generally try to make
00:11:51.600 yeah is that i accept the repercussions of my decisions good bad or indifferent but my only point
00:11:57.120 is i'm just trying to like let you know this is how the men see it and this is what they're talking
00:12:01.280 about in the red pill i get it um okay what were your biggest disagreements with me before you met me
00:12:11.200 biggest disagreements
00:12:14.880 or anything on the show that you've that you've disagreed with that i said i think there were
00:12:19.760 maybe three things okay um the first well i had only watched one video on your instagram um because i
00:12:26.720 i didn't want to do too deep of a dive just yet right and it was the women aren't entitled to safety
00:12:31.120 um and i think it's triggering because like you think of like well why can't like why do i have
00:12:36.960 to fear going down a dark alley right but then when you actually think about it none of us are entitled
00:12:40.960 to safety so that statement is actually true so um that was one thing so i kind of went through my own
00:12:47.440 thought process we move forward i don't even know so many people triggered over that one yeah because it's
00:12:51.600 like you do want to be like well why can't i go down uh an alley at one in the morning well you can
00:12:56.480 but you know whatever uh but i think the other thing we had um on the show again i don't disagree
00:13:04.240 with okay maybe the the fat comments aren't that nice although i can't i can't say i i i would say
00:13:10.960 that i get the large majestic i don't i don't think they're nice um i get they started though okay
00:13:18.880 but i mean so i get you trying to defend yourself and like when somebody says something mean to you
00:13:23.120 or again if someone's not nice to you you're going to be not nice back so even from your
00:13:29.040 perspective i still get it it's like you attack me well i'm gonna you're gonna hit me i'm going
00:13:32.880 below the belt i'm going you're going low i'm going to hell you know what i mean so i also even
00:13:37.200 even though i don't agree i understand because if you're going to talk about me i'm gonna talk about
00:13:40.400 you too right and i think the only thing during um our our talk with andrew that i think i got maybe a
00:13:46.640 little hyper was when we were talking about the child support stuff and that's just because that
00:13:51.280 is a close to home topic and it is a very um it is a topic that is to me is talked about a lot and
00:13:58.960 people who don't have a kid who aren't going through this process the lawyers the custody
00:14:05.360 child support all that stuff you don't have a clue you know so every law every state is has different
00:14:11.440 laws so i think that was the only thing where i felt kind of hyper but we talked about that like
00:14:16.080 on the on the show we kind of got into that stuff and why i felt the way i felt so i don't know i like
00:14:20.960 you i'm gonna be honest like i i definitely want to shoot more stuff together and i i the pair of
00:14:26.640 nobody saw coming yeah like i i think you're cool as fuck so i don't know like i i think that i watched
00:14:32.160 a lot of videos about about you on tick tock um people were very like ugly to you um and i don't
00:14:40.960 think they really see your personality and they don't understand that there is a voice
00:14:47.600 every voice is very important right everybody's voice it doesn't matter how what shitty you think
00:14:52.960 their content is you think they're this their point their perspective is valid and they are
00:14:57.200 representing a group of people so you can't if you care about feelings and you care about truth
00:15:02.160 then you wouldn't try to downplay other people's perception like it's it's valid and there's a lot of
00:15:07.360 things too that we talk about like that you talk about with the marriage and the contracts and
00:15:11.520 disadvantages and biological things those are things that just cannot be argued like from a
00:15:17.040 biological standpoint a lot of stuff makes sense so i like what you're doing personally and i like you
00:15:21.920 as a person and i think if more people actually sat down and talked to you they would like that's just
00:15:27.280 my yeah tell that tell that to the beautiful majestic creatures i'm not saying anymore it's the beautiful
00:15:34.080 the sea creatures um okay guys if you have a question to submit to britney um go on my story i'm
00:15:44.480 gonna pick a couple right now it's on instagram just pearly things one they took away my actual ones i'm gonna
00:15:51.040 go go okay okay oh this is my looking oily am i good do you do you think body count matters
00:15:58.960 for men or women for women well if we're talking about this space that we're in it does matter
00:16:04.960 they like they're literally using body count as a way to it's like it's a scale um of course i'm
00:16:10.640 gonna say no because i don't want to be judged for my body count i wouldn't judge a man for his body count
00:16:14.400 um but we're in a world where women are judged so to a lot of men it does matter there are some men
00:16:20.800 we don't know the percentage whatever there are some men who don't give a so yeah i think yes and
00:16:24.960 no would you would you agree that like better marriages like tend to be formed when they're
00:16:30.560 both virgins or when the woman's a virgin at least i would say from this is from my theory about that is
00:16:38.640 if you don't know about anything else there's a greater chance you're going to stay so what i've
00:16:46.800 come to realize with having different types of sex when you have a big one you know when it's a small
00:16:55.840 one right you know like and these things this experience it shapes how you view what the ideal
00:17:04.640 partner or guy or sex is like and so if i if i take the concept that we're both virgins we both don't
00:17:10.480 know about you can get choked get spitting in mouths and anal and all this crazy stuff sorry but i'm just
00:17:16.560 saying wait y'all spit in each other's mouths oh my god you never have no i've done a lot of
00:17:25.520 shit though girl all right ew no that's ew sorry sorry uh i feel like yeah you only know of each other so
00:17:33.040 there's a greater chance like your mind doesn't necessarily i would i'm not gonna say it doesn't
00:17:37.040 wander but i would say that there's a the probability is a lot lower because you don't know anything
00:17:41.360 that's it you know you don't know what a you know a lysol can's like because you never been with
00:17:48.560 your husband's a five inch he's a six incher okay
00:17:56.400 do you think you've peaked and if so what age peaked and what like look wise yeah look wise do you
00:18:02.880 think you've peaked physically and if so what age like when i was in my best shape i mean obviously
00:18:09.120 i've had a baby now so my my body's changed i will say that the the base is still pretty much the same
00:18:15.360 i feel like my favorite body if i'm looking back at old pictures
00:18:20.960 probably 2019 it's probably like i all the pictures i took then i'm like damn how old were you 2019 i'm not
00:18:30.640 good at math but um sorry i can't even so like two years ago yeah i feel like that three years three
00:18:38.880 years ago i'm sorry like i said yeah um i i feel like um body wise 2019 yeah i feel like that was my
00:18:46.000 favorite body um because again i feel like i've always had a really because genetically i've just
00:18:50.080 always had a really nice body and i was always in the gym as well um but i think i was a lot skinnier
00:18:55.920 in the 2015 2016 so 2019 was probably like my favorite and then when do you think most women peak
00:19:06.000 also probably like mid-20s maybe yeah i mean i like i'm going off of when i look at the girls i went
00:19:13.200 to high school with on my facebook i'm like she used to be that girl and she's not that girl now you
00:19:19.920 know not trying to be mean it's just like they just look a lot it's honest and it's like you
00:19:24.640 can't control a lot of it's genetic so unless you have the money to get like work done you're going
00:19:29.520 to age it's a natural thing so i don't even say that to be nasty i just feel like probably like
00:19:33.760 mid-20s like 25 26 maybe 25 usually yes that would be my guess i i think i actually think most girls
00:19:41.440 peak at like 19. i think most of the people 19. yeah i really do like still babies i feel like you're
00:19:46.720 still growing into your body and stuff um most girls i know in the u.s got fat like most girls
00:19:53.200 are in better shape when they're 19 and i think that's like half of it okay um maybe some got a
00:19:59.280 little better style by like 21 22 but i feel like i noticed yeah i think 19 okay for most girls okay
00:20:07.440 blessing my thing isn't loading because of the service can you connect me to the wi-fi for a second
00:20:14.880 thank you this has been fun i'm so glad we got to like talk blessing is top producer
00:20:23.760 thank you um guys go to instagram um follow it while you're there but for real submit questions
00:20:29.920 because i'm gonna have her do them in a second okay um okay have you noticed a difference in dating
00:20:36.800 since you became a single mother yes um okay tell me about that do you do you feel like like that has
00:20:43.360 been the biggest difference what was bigger than having a kid or the book the book really oh i thought
00:20:49.760 the kid would be bigger than the book the book for sure like there was a time i'm telling you at one
00:20:57.440 point the dms were looking like a nike store with all the checks right after the book must be nice
00:21:04.320 i'm saying but after the book it was it was quiet i feel like it took a i don't even really want to
00:21:11.520 say when it picked back up i don't even know probably maybe like eight seven or eight months after the
00:21:18.800 book it started to kind of bounce back out but i'm talking it was quiet and that was how old
00:21:24.240 i think i was 26 when i released my book yeah 26 yeah they say the wall the wall is undefeated it's like 27
00:21:30.480 would you date someone like tate would i date someone like him yeah could you do the multiple
00:21:39.040 wives if he was open with you from the jump
00:21:45.520 it's like i would want him to myself um but i like the way he carries himself i feel like he has that
00:21:54.960 mufasa energy and i do think it's a lot different if you are it's full transparency i'm never going
00:22:03.680 to say never because a lot can happen between now and never but i like the idea of someone just being
00:22:10.160 fully transparent and i don't know exactly i don't know if i could be one of several but i just don't
00:22:17.680 want to say never i don't know i'm just going to keep an open mind so i like transparency i like
00:22:22.080 honesty i can respect honesty if you could have a perfect man that you wanted six six six
00:22:28.640 you know what that means no i was like what okay six six feet six inches um six inches six figures
00:22:36.320 oh my god i love all these terms would you would you give up your career give up my career yeah for
00:22:43.040 the perfect guy so i'm just what i'm at home doing nothing or what am i doing you're being a mother being
00:22:50.960 a mom kids yeah i have to have more kids is that a part of the deal do i have to offer on my uterus
00:22:58.160 or can't we just be in love um you don't want to have more kids i don't know never say never i i
00:23:05.440 again i don't want to like make i don't say i never want to have more kids i would never do this
00:23:09.760 because i just feel like i've been humbled in a lot of ways so right now unless a man wants to marry me
00:23:16.400 why would i have more kids i already have maybe daddy you know like i can't imagine more you know
00:23:21.760 especially with all that commitment again if something we get married it doesn't work out
00:23:24.240 that's a whole you know whatever but if what i give my career have the perfect guy like he sees the
00:23:31.440 beauty in the grand canyon and dance like does the bachata in the restaurant and is romantic
00:23:36.400 god i don't know that's hard sometimes when you talk it sounds like la la land
00:23:44.320 respectfully i mean just because you'll talk about these guys and i'm like these men aren't real
00:23:49.520 see what man sees the beauty is talking about the beauty in the grand canyon
00:23:54.800 but why can't i have a guy that sees the beauty in the grand canyon why why would i want someone
00:23:58.960 that doesn't see the beauty in the grand canyon why can't why can't i have a millionaire
00:24:02.240 but he doesn't see the beauty in the grand canyon so you're gonna be able to make your own money so
00:24:08.320 why like at the end of the day you grew up with money so why would that even really impress you
00:24:13.600 no my point is like it's just sometimes i think when we talk about like these perfect guys
00:24:18.640 and it's look it when i was younger oh god it's so embarrassing i don't really want to say it online
00:24:23.680 everyone's gonna roast me why would they roast you because embarrassing when i was a kid like oh my gosh
00:24:29.360 like i totally had like a list of like what i wanted in my future husband what's that's not dumb
00:24:34.000 that's really smart it does but when i read it back i was like god damn i was delusional no i i think
00:24:39.840 like god damn i think for me that i've i'm not looking for like a perfect guy i just want a guy that
00:24:46.960 has similar values and yeah like i don't know how to be to be quite honest with you like why would a guy
00:24:54.000 see the value in me if he doesn't even see the value in this is going to sound so crazy i don't
00:24:59.120 care if you don't see the beauty in like the world and the land and all these things why why the
00:25:06.000 fuck would you think i'm valuable you don't even think the great in the grand canyons like its value
00:25:10.880 speaks for itself so you're not going to see the value in me like so yeah i mean for me i i don't i
00:25:18.800 don't want a millionaire over someone who would want to do that with me that's just where i'm at
00:25:23.280 and i'm okay with that it's not like it's like grand canyon is a big ditch in higher
00:25:30.480 oh my god whatever but that's what i'm saying like you're looking at the world with a feminine lens
00:25:36.880 you know what i mean like the man will see the grand canyon like i just think of my brothers okay
00:25:41.440 and they're not they're not trying to look at the grand canyon and see the beauty in it and my dad is
00:25:46.240 i look up to my dad more than anyone in the world he is a great he is a great man okay and like i
00:25:51.760 go to him for like everything and i'm like he would think it was cool but he's trying to bike it
00:25:59.120 but that but that to me is cool no but yeah that's what i'm saying though like somebody who would want
00:26:03.920 to bike is someone who would want to hike like that to me it's not about like oh wow just the grand
00:26:09.120 canyon it's more so that like i think that's cool him even wanting to bike is cool to me that's the kind
00:26:14.320 of guy i would want like i would love to bike the grand canyon with someone that i love that it's
00:26:18.720 like but it's like see this is where i often like kind of see where the guys are coming from because
00:26:24.080 it's like my dad probably would be looked over by most women when he was in his 20s he was a little
00:26:28.560 nerdy guy the university of chicago shout out dad shout out yeah shout out shout out father um
00:26:36.000 i already know these comments are hilarious oh my god can i read you one it's kind of mean though
00:26:43.360 i won't i won't i won't that's fine i just had to ask her to stop being a hoe what did they think
00:26:48.640 would happen like what she's gonna say yeah um okay oh guys the tate and the tate britney pearl video um
00:26:59.440 it's probably coming out friday my thumbnail guy is out of town this week um so he's out of town until
00:27:04.880 thursday so friday we're gonna do it um how did you feel about that conversation like as a whole
00:27:12.240 good um i think i'm saying i think if i had to do it over again i would have had one maybe two less
00:27:18.880 people on the panel okay just because i really wanted to hear you more and i felt like there was
00:27:25.440 some people on the panel that just like kept talking for a very long time yeah and i think too i want to
00:27:30.640 clarify because i like i know that they're gonna love that video like i love that you even put that
00:27:35.360 together and thought about adding me to that um when i am in a group setting especially like that
00:27:40.800 that type of panel i'm an active listener so when somebody's talking you be quiet you don't talk so i
00:27:47.280 think that's why for me when people are going around and there's three people that have made a point
00:27:51.680 whatever i had to say i'm just like i kind of didn't get to say it because again i believe in just
00:27:55.920 listening and let people letting people talk and then when it's my turn to talk i'll talk so i didn't have a
00:27:59.600 lot of times it was my turn to talk yeah and when i did i thought i kind of had to like hey actually
00:28:04.720 you know so yeah it wasn't like like i and again i liked a lot of the stuff that we talked about you
00:28:09.440 know yeah i think if i had to do it again but something tells me you know there may be uh yeah
00:28:15.120 another one in the future yeah do you want to get married
00:28:21.520 and are you okay would you be okay with a long-term relationship without marriage
00:28:24.880 yes i've actually thought about this because i would i don't even think it's really the paper
00:28:33.040 that i want i think it's just the commitment and like i would i think i like the idea of a wedding
00:28:38.960 more than we have to go sign this and then when we divorce the courts are in our business because of
00:28:44.000 like what i'm going through with the child support custody stuff um getting out of that contract is
00:28:48.320 going to be hard right um so yeah i would be i would want like still i want to ring still want
00:28:55.360 a wedding but i wouldn't have to i don't think we would have to do it in front of the courts yeah
00:28:59.840 it would just be a commitment to each other and i've like i said i've actually thought about that
00:29:03.360 because i think i was watching one of your videos where a lot of women just want the celebration the
00:29:06.880 wedding and they and they don't actually care to get married um so yeah i would be open to that would
00:29:12.320 you be okay with like because i always say i would be cool i want to say a courthouse wedding okay but
00:29:19.040 you know i then i'm like you know if he doesn't want to do the contract that's fine but yeah i was
00:29:24.320 thinking like just like a small thing with like my parents and my immediate family like i i think that
00:29:28.720 sounds nicer than like this big like who needs 300 people at a wedding yeah i don't even know 300
00:29:34.160 people that would show up so no i i love the idea of just like the ceremony and reception and people just
00:29:40.080 celebrating your your guys's union and it doesn't have to be in front of like i said on paper so
00:29:45.520 that's kind of where i have changed my views a little bit where i'm like it's not even really
00:29:49.920 the contract that i'm wanting because like whatever who gives a i just want you and like all the fun
00:29:55.840 stuff that comes along with it that you know sorry i just know how the guys are gonna see they're like
00:30:02.400 the fun stuff that comes with it they're like they've been sold they're not i mean it is what it is but
00:30:08.400 it's like yeah i mean because it's not just about like i want to be able again if especially if i'm
00:30:14.160 marrying someone who has all of this i've always been open to prenups like because it's never about
00:30:19.840 like oh i want to take half of everything um even when i was with my ex like we had talked about
00:30:25.600 prenups like whatever you know i'm cool with that but i think that's just where it's like yeah you you
00:30:30.400 want the the cute stuff that comes with marriage but i don't even really know if people actually want to
00:30:34.880 go through the process especially of getting out of it i don't think they really want can i ask you
00:30:39.120 because um i was just thinking can i ask you about child support and like that so yeah they're saying
00:30:45.680 you have you get 10 000 a month on child support no i don't i do not i don't get 200 000 i don't get
00:30:51.520 10 000 and right now we are going through the process of child support and custody so unless we
00:30:59.520 can work something out between us we will be going to trial probably in a few months right now i'm
00:31:05.680 getting 2500 a month okay could you do just like 50 50 custody with him would he want to do that
00:31:13.440 because of his career he most likely would not be awarded that because he play he's on the road so
00:31:19.520 much um i'm very open-minded whenever he wants to see our son and come get him like he's getting them
00:31:26.000 from the the 29th to the 7th like because he's traveling on this two-week period right now so
00:31:30.960 anytime he wants him i let him see him like i mean he's i love pj that's why i had a baby with him so
00:31:37.840 despite like all our that's been out there and how hard it has been transitioning from romantic to like
00:31:44.880 basically strangers that we got a co-parent now um i still love him i love him to death you know but um
00:31:50.640 yeah so with the custody stuff i'm very open-minded i just think with his career it would be
00:31:55.360 hard for a judge to like award him 50 50 just because he travels so much because in my head like
00:32:02.000 isn't it something that could be worked out like outside of court it is but hearts don't break even
00:32:07.920 and he i think in his mind he has a number which i won't say but he has a number that he wants to stick
00:32:15.840 to and basically when you're going through this process for north carolina law because it's very
00:32:20.160 different other places you don't get a percentage if you both combined make a annually over 300 000
00:32:26.720 you're considered off the charts off off grid so then at this point you have to prove how much you
00:32:31.760 need in child support so any bills that my son occupies rent car note cable groceries those are
00:32:38.960 things that my son occupies and in charlotte um the least amount that i could that i could get would
00:32:44.720 be 50 of each of those expenses right the most depending on his career and what the judge sees
00:32:50.720 fit it could be up to 97 so whatever bills he occupies would be covered whatever for his clothes
00:32:57.680 and diapers and all that and then that's accumulated in a financial affidavit is what it's called right
00:33:02.880 and then you present it to him his team if he wants to settle outside if he's like actually no that's too
00:33:08.560 high i don't want to do that i'd rather try my chances in court then that's when you go to trial do you
00:33:12.800 do you think that he would give you nothing if it was up to him for the first two months he gave me
00:33:18.080 nothing do you think that moving forward he would continue to i think he would would just give me 2500
00:33:26.560 um you don't think that's i think that's plenty to raise a kid well when you go based on the laws
00:33:32.000 for north carolina it's all the bills that my son occupies so my car note is i think it's 2000
00:33:40.080 um our rent is 27 50 um all these bills so i'm saying it's those two bills alone are already
00:33:51.600 around but so this is just like the way the map
00:33:56.400 as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this
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