She Was SHOCKED When She Heard This 😱😱
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
219.36517
Summary
In this episode, I speak to Liz, a dating coach and dating coach, about the dangers of sexual harassment in the 21st century and how to combat it. We talk about how to deal with it, how to prevent it, and what to do about it.
Transcript
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what do you think starts the problem though so it's like if they went to these forums or to
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these youtube channels or whatever like something had to start it where it's different today than
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it was 50 years ago what do you think that is i think you know just with with the advent of
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of social media and stuff like that and there's there's just so much like like this tinder
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statistics right it's like if guys aren't using professional pictures the first thing we do when
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a guy signs up for my my eight-week program is we get in professional pictures and then liz and
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some other girls on the team pick the top five and then we apply face app so they're going from
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like average photos to pro photos to the best five pro photos to the face app versions and now
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they're getting like a night and day difference in the quantity and quality of matches whereas
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you know before they might have just put up whatever pictures didn't get the result and then they see
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their friend maybe like you know one of their cool guy friends he's getting a lot of girls but they
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don't know how to navigate that properly but then when they look on social media they see you know
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these perfect looking people and they say well i'm not perfect looking right and i have these flaws and
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people have these different handicaps they place on themselves where they are cognizant of all these
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different flaws they have and then they think that that makes them not good enough for the girls
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and then that causes the rejection and that like reinforces the belief and then it just continues
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in a cycle right and people are you know not many people are called approaching anyways like even
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even in your generation stuff like that no but it's gotten even less common now much less and with
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covid and stuff like this you know not many people were going out and i i think that even once
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like night venues and stuff reopened not as many people go out anymore and a lot of clients i work
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with their ego is like very tied to approaching a female in public so if that girl rejects them they
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feel horrible about themselves and it's it's tough for them to go back in and try again and then if that
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rejection happens again it keeps it's like a it's like a negative momentum and then they they just
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usually give up so my job is to to show them like look you have you can totally do this and show
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them real tangible results and that starts a positive momentum and then they end up with a
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place of options and they can pick the best one for the girlfriend or something like this what do
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you what do you think about the men that say they're afraid to approach because of the me too
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movement i mean that's a very real thing like i live in brazil that stuff's not really going on over
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there yet but in the western nations it's it's a really bad thing i just did a video on my channel
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about like in scotland if you're talking about like a sexual conquest and a woman overhears you
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can be sent to jail you can be sent to jail yeah it's like a new thing why yeah and in england too
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like i i correct me if i'm wrong but like if you like cat call girl on the street you can get in
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trouble now right i'm pretty sure that like it depends like it'll have to be something like
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i don't know it depends they won't arrest you it's not an arrestable offense no it does it says
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this legislation will this legis wait this legis this legislation will criminal criminalize acts
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including cat calling and making offensive gestures and walking too closely behind someone at night yes
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ridiculous and same like the scotland thing it's if you brush up against someone and i've been in tons
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of nightclubs right so i spent a lot of my time in my life for better or worse but you know
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inadvertently you're going to be brushing up against people when you're packed in into a club
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and that's i can put you in jail now in scotland if you brush up against someone so what do you say
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to guys that are in countries with laws like that do you tell them not to approach or what's your
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what's your solution as a dating coach i mean if they i tell them to move if they can i mean that's
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pretty extreme but like in australia for instance like they have a new thing where women can change
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their mind about consent during sex and that's you know i have australian clients and they're just
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terrified they don't even want to get in a sexual situation because there's no one there to witness
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that so it's just he said she said right and they're going to take the side of the girl in a lot of the
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cases i'm not saying that like bad stuff doesn't happen but it makes guys very apprehensive same with
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the scotland stuff guys were already afraid to go to approach and now they don't want to have legal
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trouble right so as these countries and what they're trying to do is combat harassment of women
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these are real problems but when they impose these very strict kind of lockdown measures
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then it turns men away from speaking and leads to the statistic it's a pendulum swinging too far
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i'm curious um because you've lived like everywhere yeah what what is your experience dating in
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different countries so i lived in poland in ukraine and i often talk on my channel that the the women
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are just much more family oriented it's almost almost like the u.s like 50 years ago so it's like
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they're more like feminine elegant um kind of stronger moral system looking for kind of family
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stuff like that on on the flip side of the coin they take longer to hook up with which was annoying
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right like in ukraine it would take like two to five dates to to actually hook up with a girl i added
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situations where i'd be on a fourth date in public and they weren't ready to kiss yet which i've never
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encountered anywhere else but there's not a lot of this you know um kind of me too stuff that's happening
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in the u.s and happening in in the uk and stuff like that but again these are very real problems
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that need to be addressed but when they say that you can't speak about you know hooking up with a
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girl with an earshot of another woman or you can't brush up against someone even if it was an accident
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or stuff like this it starts to blur the line between you know guys just living their life versus
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potentially encountering trouble and guys want to err on the side of caution a lot of cases
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and the things we've already discussed about how guys are already apprehensive
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that adds to it and they just figure you know i'm not gonna even bother with that i'm just gonna
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watch corn i guess or stuff like this interesting so you really think that the me too movement has
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contributed to male sexlessness yes they don't want the risk yeah because i because i have access
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to like thousands of clients and i hear these these things all the time and like you know the guys in
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australia a lot of them couldn't even leave because of the you know during the pandemic but they're
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really terrified about getting in a situation where a girl later says hey i changed my mind about
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consent and then what happens from there right or or a guy you know approaching a girl and she
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doesn't like it maybe in the uk is he now going to get in trouble right so as we said not many people
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were called approaching to begin with but when you put these kind of restrictions on guys are even
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more intimidated right because now there's not just rejection there's also legal consequences
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has that ever happened to any of your clients or someone you know um getting in trouble for
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no i can't think of any any instances but i think it's more of a it just makes people gun shy yeah
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it's more that it could happen yeah yeah they don't want to you know just the fact that that exists
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and makes them just not want to even be part of that so like why you know they don't want to put
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their freedom on the line or something like that to get a hookup yeah that's kind of because i and
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i'm doing the documentary on the court system here and i'm starting to like learn um you don't even
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have to be married it's a crazy thing it's just with a kid um just the shit that guys go through
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um especially with getting access to their kids and they can get a lot of false accusations because
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here um they're literally paid um they're given free counsel if you accuse a guy of assault and a
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lot of the um centers here know that so they encourage the woman to do it um yeah and even though
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it doesn't happen to every guy i'm like listening to these stories i'm like if i was a guy i would be so
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i've heard a lot of stories like that from clients where like basically like like women that
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cheat for instance if the the husband finds out like i've heard of a lot of situations where the
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guy um gets screwed because the woman just says you know the guy that hooked up the woman just says
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like it was non-consensual just so she can save the marriage and there's no consequence on the woman
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again i'm not saying like sexual assault doesn't happen and it's not a real problem but it's like a
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nice little like roll of the dice in in a bunch of cases where i know people specifically where
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you know it's like a real danger even even in the u.s like a guy i had a client where he he basically
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like um had sex with a girl in las vegas in a hotel room and she said oh i paid for the room like
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stay the night and he said i'm gonna leave and she ran down and said oh you know he he graped me
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basically and you know situations like that or if they cheat and then the partner finds out
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it's very easy to say it wasn't consensual so they can save the marriage and they don't care what
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happens to the guy's life right and then it just becomes a he said she said yes i'm just curious
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for the girls um if you were in the position of guys where the laws were against you i do need to
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say something about it go ahead go ahead it's interesting right and so a lot of people do
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mention toxic uh masculinity but i definitely think the crisis that's happening and i can see it
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it's if i label it is from toxic femininity femininity i can't really say the word properly
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because how do you how do you expect people to express themselves when they're scared men boys
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are so scared to express themselves to approach you but the main complaint from all of my girlfriends
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or the people that i know is the men are not being men enough yeah they're not like literally
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approaching exactly but look who created that but then when we have laws like that how can
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because i'm just thinking if i was in their point of view and you guys can tell me if you agree or
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disagree but i would be really hesitant if that was a law and then also we complain about men not wanting
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to get married but if you look at the laws in here in the west i won't get married why would i get
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married and like risk 50 of my income mainly i make the most out of that income and i don't think
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that's fair as well there is there is a privilege for women and there is a man privilege as well
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and i think i'll tell you it's not even marriage it's um it's just having a kid exactly that's the
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crazy thing i just talked to this guy um the other day and he wasn't legally married he just had a kid
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here um and what she did was she um went to like a woman's shelter and basically at the woman's
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shelter they tell the girls like what to say about the guy based on his background i know he's like
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these people yeah and so um for him for him he was muslim and she basically said that everything
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she did the last 10 years she didn't actually consent to doing because it was under his control
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like control allegedly even though she was fine with it while they were married yes and then
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they don't really get a fair shot in court yes and and it took him over a year to actually get
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to go to court so he didn't see his kid for a year with no evidence yeah yeah and that's normal
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and you know what's funny i think things are changing now after amber heard yeah you know
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i think the court and people and judges are kind of like looking for more evidence and then thinking
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okay maybe are there women are using this listen i stand up for women i love women but i think also
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abusing men i don't stand for it i think there's have to be a balance between men femininity and
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masculinity and you have to honor each other and that's the thing is that balance isn't it because
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i think there was a movement at one point where it was believe all women which goes completely
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against our tenants of actual you know innocent onto proven guilty it was just if a woman says it
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then it's and i get it where it's come from like you said earlier i mean you know there's been a lot
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of historical wrongs against women so there was a real natural need to you know redress that but i think
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the pendulum has just swung so far all over to the other way where it's like everyone's suffering
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men are suffering but now women are actually suffering because there are like you say a lot
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of your friends are single because men are terrified and i i i i i get the cries from some
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quarters in society where people say it's a deliberate thing to actually completely dismantle
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relationships because that almost seems the only logical explanation it's like there's almost like
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this real concerted effort to completely dismantle marriage because that's the only way you can explain
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it to a certain extent isn't it because some of the laws are so crazy so stupid almost so sinister it's
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like that is not fostering proper relationships proper marriage and we can see the stats of you
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know especially boys from single parent families i mean my god from crime to health to life chances
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to every stat goes against them so why are we a society pushing this real almost like an agenda
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to split people up as many of you know i was just banned on tiktok and we are demonetized on a daily
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