JustPearlyThings - March 19, 2023


These Modern Women ADMITTED This


Episode Stats


Length

8 minutes

Words per minute

208.52597

Word count

1,774

Sentence count

186

Harmful content

Misogyny

15

sentences flagged

Hate speech

5

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode we talk about toxic relationships and how to deal with them. We talk about our own experiences and how we dealt with them and how they affected our mental health. We also talk about the things we wish we would have known or could have done to make things better.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Do you think men lie to women they care about or that they or they tell the truth to women?
00:00:04.840 They lie to women they care about and they feel like maybe like certain characteristics that they have.
00:00:10.120 For example, some because some women are really stern. 1.00
00:00:14.320 Like if you cheat on me, that's it. And because they care so much, they don't want to lose you.
00:00:18.260 So that thought of having to lose you would now be in be in their head, obviously.
00:00:22.880 And yeah, they wouldn't they wouldn't tell you.
00:00:25.000 So outside of the cheating, anything else toxic or just that?
00:00:30.000 Yeah, we smoked a lot of stuff.
00:00:34.340 I guess that's drugs.
00:00:38.700 I guess that was toxic, yeah.
00:00:40.000 Okay. All right.
00:00:41.920 What about you?
00:00:43.840 Um, what was the question?
00:00:49.680 What was toxic about you said you had a toxic situationship?
00:00:53.200 Yeah, what was toxic about it?
00:00:54.720 It was very emotionally abusive.
00:00:56.760 So like even though I see myself as a strong person, but there's only so many times you can like get knocked down and I dealt with it and I feel like I didn't respect my own boundaries, which led to me being in that situation.
00:01:10.100 Yeah, it was just very unhealthy.
00:01:11.100 What is emotional abuse?
00:01:13.100 Um, I think to constantly knock someone's confidence down, make them feel bad about themselves, to threaten them.
00:01:19.440 Like what specifically?
00:01:21.440 Um, I don't know, like it could really be anything like, you know, just.
00:01:27.440 I'm asking like to you, like, what did he say?
00:01:29.440 Like what?
00:01:30.440 How was he emotionally abusive?
00:01:31.440 Oh, he just like, just used to knock me down.
00:01:34.440 Like I used to be a bit slow because I had a history of like doing like party drugs and like, I feel like it actually affected my like mental development a bit.
00:01:44.780 Like I had a starter for a long time, like I was a bit slow and it was one of my biggest insecurities and I used to get dig that a lot for that, like, oh, you're so slow, you're stupid, you're this.
00:01:54.440 And that's what he would say to you.
00:01:55.440 Yeah.
00:01:56.440 And also, um, I lost a lot of weight because of stress and I was very insecure in my skin.
00:02:01.440 He'd be like, oh, you're so skinny.
00:02:02.440 You're like, you're so much weight.
00:02:03.440 It would just make me feel like a bit rubbish about myself.
00:02:07.440 Um.
00:02:08.440 And what did, what did you say to him back?
00:02:10.440 Like, did you push back or what?
00:02:11.440 Yeah, I would push back.
00:02:12.440 I would tell him like, don't talk to me like that or I don't like that or something.
00:02:15.440 Cause he did, used to like threaten me and stuff, but.
00:02:17.440 He used to threaten you?
00:02:18.440 Yeah.
00:02:19.440 He was, he was an asshole.
00:02:20.440 Like threatened, threatened to do like, what, kill you or?
00:02:23.440 No, like just to like, you know, bring his fists up to me and stuff.
00:02:27.440 I knew he would never do anything, but like, yeah, it was just not a nice situation.
00:02:31.440 I would always stand my ground about that, but I would continue to put up with it for so long.
00:02:35.440 So that's why.
00:02:36.440 Like I was disrespected for so long, but literally after I got out of it, I put on weight.
00:02:42.440 Like I was, I got glow.
00:02:43.440 Like life is good.
00:02:45.440 Oh, we love a happy ending.
00:02:47.440 Yeah.
00:02:48.440 Yeah.
00:02:49.440 Um, what about, no.
00:02:52.440 You, you said yes.
00:02:53.440 I mean, I can't lie.
00:02:54.440 You were, you were sort of, uh, maybe.
00:02:55.440 Um, no.
00:02:56.440 He told you not to wear something.
00:02:57.440 Yeah.
00:02:58.440 That's literally it.
00:02:59.440 Yeah, yeah.
00:03:00.440 Out the door.
00:03:01.440 I've done this too many times.
00:03:02.440 I know.
00:03:03.440 I feel like I relate to her as well.
00:03:04.440 Cause you know what it is.
00:03:05.440 Now I'm hearing both the stories.
00:03:06.440 Maybe I have actually been in a toxic relationship or toxic ex, but everyone has their own meaning
00:03:19.440 of toxic at the end of the day.
00:03:21.440 Obviously I'm sure there is like a meaning by book, but everyone has their like individual
00:03:25.440 definition.
00:03:26.440 Yeah.
00:03:27.440 Yeah.
00:03:28.440 Yeah.
00:03:29.440 One meaning.
00:03:30.440 One meaning.
00:03:31.440 Yeah.
00:03:32.440 You know what I'm trying to say.
00:03:33.440 But yeah, basically I think with me, obviously, um, it wasn't for that long.
00:03:37.440 I think, I think what's toxic is like, he was saying he wanted to see me, but didn't
00:03:41.440 see me.
00:03:42.440 And this was about eight months.
00:03:44.440 So he would say he'd want to see you and then he wouldn't see you.
00:03:48.440 Cause he constantly like makes promises to you or makes plans of you and lets you down
00:03:57.440 consistently.
00:03:58.440 And it's like, you cannot take advantage of me.
00:04:00.440 I'll be like, leave then.
00:04:01.440 Stop leading me on.
00:04:02.440 I'm not leading you on.
00:04:03.440 Have you ever promised to go on a date and not go, not went?
00:04:07.440 Have you ever blown off a guy for a date?
00:04:09.440 Yeah.
00:04:10.440 Multiple times.
00:04:11.440 Are you guys all toxic?
00:04:12.440 Yeah.
00:04:13.440 I used to be.
00:04:14.440 I used to be.
00:04:15.440 To an extent.
00:04:16.440 I used to do the whole life.
00:04:17.440 To an extent.
00:04:18.440 I used to do the whole player thing.
00:04:19.440 I will lead you on and then just maybe.
00:04:20.440 I'm pretty sure all girls have entertained guys like plenty of times in their lifetime.
00:04:24.440 It's for their own selfish reasons.
00:04:25.440 Yeah.
00:04:26.440 Yeah, but women aren't demonized for it. 1.00
00:04:28.440 Men are.
00:04:29.440 We call it entertainment.
00:04:30.440 It is entertainment.
00:04:31.440 It is entertainment.
00:04:32.440 It is entertainment.
00:04:33.440 Women can be just as bad. 1.00
00:04:34.440 I think we'll have on to the Friday night entertainment.
00:04:35.440 I'll be like.
00:04:36.440 Rotation eight guys.
00:04:37.440 You can say like a rotation entertainment.
00:04:40.440 Ha, ha, ha.
00:04:41.440 But when a guy says that he's toxic.
00:04:42.440 Yeah.
00:04:43.440 Yeah.
00:04:44.440 That's absolutely correct.
00:04:45.440 He says the exact same thing.
00:04:46.440 I do think women can be just as bad as men though. 1.00
00:04:48.440 Some women are actually demons. 1.00
00:04:49.440 Yeah.
00:04:50.440 Like.
00:04:51.440 Evil.
00:04:52.440 Pure evil.
00:04:53.440 Yeah.
00:04:54.440 Tell me.
00:04:55.440 Who are you thinking of?
00:04:56.440 What story?
00:04:57.440 No, I've just like seen how like some women treat men and like, you know, some women can 1.00
00:05:02.440 be very narcissistic.
00:05:03.440 I think social media especially has like become a breeding ground for narcissism and a lot
00:05:10.440 of people.
00:05:11.440 But I do also think the term is thrown around very loosely.
00:05:13.440 And a lot of people are accused of being a narcissist when they're actually not.
00:05:16.440 No, but what girl, you said you could think of a narcissistic girl. 0.99
00:05:20.440 Is there a story?
00:05:21.440 Give us a tea.
00:05:22.440 Yeah.
00:05:23.440 Spill the tea maybe.
00:05:24.440 Um, I mean I could use like my, I don't know, like I don't know any narcissistic women. 1.00
00:05:30.440 Oh, sure.
00:05:31.440 But I've like heard stories and stuff.
00:05:32.440 Oh, you've heard stories.
00:05:33.440 I've heard lots of stories and it's, it's actually like heartbreaking because a lot of
00:05:36.440 the time these men really care for these women and they're trapped in this abusive relationship.
00:05:41.440 Yeah, but you know what?
00:05:42.440 A lot of girls trap guys by getting pregnant. 1.00
00:05:44.440 They do, but at the same time.
00:05:45.440 And that happens a lot.
00:05:46.440 And then they have all this baby mum and dad job, but it's like it's mad.
00:05:49.440 No, but do you know what it is?
00:05:50.440 Yeah.
00:05:51.440 When it comes to like trapping a man with a baby, you need to be careful who you sleep
00:05:54.440 with.
00:05:55.440 If you're sleeping with people loosely and you, you run the risk of getting that person pregnant. 0.98
00:05:59.440 So you have to, you have to sit, like you dug your grave.
00:06:02.440 But that runs back to what we said earlier.
00:06:03.440 Do you remember what we said earlier about if you, you only go into relationship to date
00:06:06.440 that person, you date that person if you want to be with them and you get into relationship
00:06:08.440 because of trust.
00:06:09.440 Yeah.
00:06:10.440 And then you'd only sleep with that person if you're like, don't mean that tight.
00:06:13.440 Yeah, but at the same time, at the same time, if you don't want a baby, then you
00:06:16.440 need to wrap up because like as much as it takes two to tango, you need to protect yourself
00:06:21.440 for your own good.
00:06:22.440 Like, yeah, the woman can say she's on the pill, she's on this, she's on that. 0.97
00:06:25.440 But like, at the same time, protect yourself.
00:06:28.440 Yeah.
00:06:29.440 You said you've, you've heard of a girl trapping a guy. 0.99
00:06:31.440 Tell me about that.
00:06:32.440 Oh no.
00:06:33.440 We're just baiting people's business out today.
00:06:36.440 You don't have to say names.
00:06:37.440 You don't have to say names.
00:06:38.440 But obviously someone in the music industry, I don't know about who it is, I can't even
00:06:42.440 show the story.
00:06:43.440 But you can if you want.
00:06:44.440 Yeah, be careful, babes.
00:06:45.440 Be careful.
00:06:46.440 But, but, what was I going to say?
00:06:49.440 Obviously, yeah, he was obviously dating, I think this like, girl, OnlyFans girl.
00:06:57.440 And, yeah, and then obviously his energy kind of switched.
00:07:01.440 Right.
00:07:02.440 And she was quite toxic. 0.55
00:07:04.440 I know she's toxic because she used to, I heard from other girls that she used to block, 1.00
00:07:09.440 she used to go on his phone and block certain goals. 0.87
00:07:11.440 Oh wow.
00:07:12.440 Oh wow.
00:07:13.440 And, um, used to go and she'd go through people's like, Insta stories and stuff.
00:07:16.440 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:07:17.440 Who he follows.
00:07:18.440 That makes sense.
00:07:19.440 Yeah.
00:07:20.440 That makes sense.
00:07:21.440 Yeah.
00:07:22.440 And then afterwards, um, obviously, who knows how she got pregnant. 0.99
00:07:26.440 Oh wow.
00:07:27.440 Yeah.
00:07:28.440 And then, um, but obviously, again, it was, it was, it wasn't serious.
00:07:31.440 He was doing it mainly for pleasure because of her body.
00:07:34.440 Right?
00:07:35.440 She's got a nice body. 1.00
00:07:36.440 Okay, cool.
00:07:37.440 What else can you bring to the table?
00:07:38.440 You know, we've got beautiful lady panelists. 1.00
00:07:40.440 Like we've all got body, body yoddy.
00:07:42.440 Yeah.
00:07:43.440 You know what I mean?
00:07:44.440 But we've got more than that.
00:07:45.440 Hence why we're here today.
00:07:46.440 That's right.
00:07:47.440 Do you know what I'm trying to say?
00:07:48.440 But obviously in the, in that case of obviously trapping him, it's crazy because now it's
00:07:53.440 messed up his career a little bit.
00:07:54.440 He obviously didn't want it.
00:07:55.440 He did not really taking responsibility and he's kind of like hiding away from everyone
00:07:59.440 almost.
00:08:00.440 And obviously that can impact the man mentally as well.
00:08:02.440 And I think a lot of people don't focus on a man's mental health as well.
00:08:07.440 And I think females are all emotional and we've got feelings, but obviously men are taught
00:08:12.440 to obviously keep that away.
00:08:14.440 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok and we are demonetized on a daily basis
00:08:20.440 on this platform.
00:08:22.440 And if you want to help, please consider sending a super thanks below.
00:08:26.440 Every donation helps and it helps make what we do possible.