JustPearlyThings - March 25, 2023


Woman Finally Takes accountability

Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
@CoachGregAdams Thoughts On Love Post Wall Woman Gets In Her Feelings After Man said this

Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

199.48

Word count

2,123

Sentence count

—

Harmful content

Misogyny

13

sentences flagged

Hate speech

2

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, I had the pleasure of sitting down with a very good friend of mine to talk about her journey in finding a husband and how she managed to find a man who was willing to commit to her. She is a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend and a daughter-in-law to her husband, a husband, and a friend to her son. She shares her story of how she fell in love with the right kind of man, how she was able to find the right type of man and what it took for her to be in a relationship.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 and you i know you mentioned you're on like a health journey so i'm assuming that's one
00:00:04.000 okay what else um for me i had to be realistic with myself um i thought about the type of man
00:00:10.000 that i wanted and then looked at myself and i was like okay how i am physically am i going to
00:00:16.800 attract the type of man that i'm i i want now i'm not saying that i can't get that type of man
00:00:21.680 because i can but it's not that i'm trying to get them i'm trying to keep them do you see what i
00:00:26.000 mean like you need to keep you i want to keep the man i want the husband i want the family and
00:00:31.280 realistically speaking a lot of men i'm not saying that you know their preferences aren't
00:00:36.320 plus size women but the type of men that i am looking for the type of man that i'm looking for 1.00
00:00:42.800 his preference would probably be somebody that is a lot that does weigh a lot less than me how much
00:00:48.640 weight have you lost um so i've been on this journey since february okay so it's new i mean it's okay
00:00:54.400 you've just started somewhere yeah i just started yeah but um since i've since the ending of february
00:00:58.720 i've lost nine pounds okay yeah okay do you have a goal weight there like you don't have to say the
00:01:03.280 weight but like a goal number like amount of pounds you're trying to lose um i want to lose around 50
00:01:08.400 pounds okay that's great that's awesome yeah um anything else that you've done self-improvement um no
00:01:14.800 okay um just this is i know that stuff guys always say so i would say i'm currently still
00:01:22.960 trying to self-improve myself um so i'm just trying to spend more time with myself just trying to do
00:01:28.720 things that makes me happy so i just go on solo dates myself um just spend more time alone i pray
00:01:35.360 more as well um i've become quite spiritual as well lately and um yeah that's what i'm and i'm trying to
00:01:41.760 get get into the gym as well i just need a bit more motivation but other than that it's just what
00:01:46.320 i've been doing is just spending time for myself and my son as well so um i'm curious for you um
00:01:52.720 because you seem very in love she's glowing look at her uh what do you feel like you brought that
00:01:58.880 other girls didn't what today no no like that got you in a relationship um i don't know god put me in
00:02:08.240 a place where my match was there um you didn't think you brought like anything that other girls 1.00
00:02:15.040 didn't i'm cute well um i don't know well well my partner essentially he's like i said he's very
00:02:25.120 intellectual so he likes a female that is very intellectual that can hold conversation um who 1.00
00:02:31.200 isn't just pretty that brings more to the table than just that i feel like a lot of um modern day
00:02:38.160 females are very like find it hard to be submissive to men and um i was that you know to my man 1.00
00:02:47.600 eventually after time um eventually after you weren't at first oh absolutely not what we're gonna do
00:02:54.480 it's at right so he needs to show me that there's a reason for me to be submissive i can't just be
00:03:00.560 submissive to any man that comes across my way he has to show me like you're conditionally submissive
00:03:07.360 no i'm forever submissive to the one to the one to the one um so he has to show me different qualities
00:03:15.920 to why i need to be submissive or why i should be submissive i think it just comes it plays in trust
00:03:21.840 really and um knowing somebody being able to empathize with that individual you know just
00:03:28.400 understanding their different attributes their way of life their way of thinking and once i've
00:03:33.280 understood that i feel like that's when i became wholeheartedly me and um yeah he fell in love i guess
00:03:43.440 you know it's interesting it's like nobody put like cooking clean you know any of the traditional
00:03:49.600 like housewife stuff like i don't think did anyone say that oh i cook and clean no i asked like it
00:03:55.200 improved at it like to to get in a relationship well you i speaking for me i come from an african
00:04:00.800 household so i have to cook and clean like you know as a woman my brother sits there and does nothing
00:04:08.880 as women that's just my culture whether it's wrong or right that's just how we've been brought up
00:04:13.520 we cook and we clean my mom cooks for us every single day if it's not every other day it's every 0.98
00:04:19.360 single day she feeds us and that's just how we were brought up so you know when you're conditioned to
00:04:25.760 something you're able to do what you're conditioned to that's what i'm conditioned to so i'm always gonna
00:04:33.520 just do what i've all i've known okay so you feel like you were raised to be a wife so you didn't need 0.79
00:04:38.160 to improve at that i'm raised to be a wife in this generation meaning i still get the bag and i still
00:04:46.320 have to be the wife absolutely but my whole purpose in life is not just to be the wife there's more to
00:04:53.600 me than just a wife you know um i'm intellectual i'm smart i'm pretty you know i have more to change
00:05:00.640 i have so much to put in this world than just to be a wife a wife why do you say just a wife
00:05:06.560 because it's not just a wife if you're proud of the man you're with no it is still just a wife even
00:05:12.880 if it is because you know i'm speaking on like you know in africa for instance let me give you that sort
00:05:18.960 of scenario hypothetical situation in africa you know i feel like they're brought up to be just wives 1.00
00:05:25.840 that's what they know you know but here i know more than just a wife i know you can be a wife and be 0.99
00:05:32.640 other things don't they have better outcomes though why aren't they more married why because 1.00
00:05:38.400 they have plenty kids yeah no no no i can be a working wife and my mom showed me that no but i'm
00:05:47.200 saying like in the west our outcomes are terrible like they're horrible and a global person i don't
00:05:52.320 know i i'm not going to tell you the stats of like africa but what i'm saying like in terms of our
00:05:57.280 divorce stats they're horrible it's like we have a 50 divorce rate 100 40 40 so i agree so being
00:06:03.840 raised to like it seems like being raised to be just a wife yeah seems like a better outcome because
00:06:09.920 you have an intact family which i would argue you you're going to be happier if you have a family
00:06:15.280 i agree but then when we're in a western society you have to include the whites the black the asians 1.00
00:06:20.160 and every other minorities or ethnicity that's put there when i'm speaking in africa i'm talking about
00:06:25.920 all the black africans and in africa um my mom will vouch for this they don't believe in divorce 0.98
00:06:32.160 neither nor do i i don't know we don't so if i'm married i'm married forever forever so they mean
00:06:37.520 as in so isn't that good that's good yeah it's good but it doesn't always happen that way you know
00:06:42.880 yeah yeah but it's regards to me if i'm getting married i'm marrying forever i'm not married i like
00:06:48.400 what you said there because my grandparents came to this country my granddad came in first
00:06:53.040 um i believe he wasn't he came here to work and my grandma had to come after
00:06:59.680 but when she came she worked too now in india she weren't working she was sending butter 0.93
00:07:08.000 she was even telling me the other day i used to make better but i'm like oh my god yeah but i get that
00:07:13.520 that that's how you in in india that's how she was she came here straight away the first thing she did
00:07:19.520 was work and she worked in a factory and you know completely different to what i see what men do now
00:07:24.720 because my granddad was working in some serious labor work you know there wasn't he came and he worked
00:07:31.840 that he's always worked his whole life being here back home here my grandma came here she worked too so it
00:07:40.000 it does depend on the country you're from as well because the first thing she thought is i need to
00:07:44.800 build a house i need us to get a mortgage what am i going to do he can't do it by himself i wasn't i
00:07:50.080 wasn't knocking woman working again i have my work yeah i was just saying i was talking about she said
00:07:56.880 just a wife and i said what's wrong with me no i don't want to just be a wife i'm saying wait wait wait
00:08:02.640 so i'm just saying you make it sound like that's such a bad thing no it's not a bad thing but even if i had
00:08:07.280 the opportunity to be just a wife i feel like me personally i would still want to have my own what
00:08:12.800 about when you have like children i still want to yeah why because i want to i want to make sure that
00:08:18.320 i portray the image of having your own and not depending on anybody in this life your five-year-old
00:08:24.080 cares no but you know what she's gonna care when she's 16 and she's 18 and she's 21. do you know why
00:08:30.160 wouldn't she rather have her mom there more because if you're because if you're working like if you have 0.95
00:08:34.720 your own and you're working 20 30 40 hours a week like you can't you can't be with your kid 100
00:08:39.600 percent like so i feel like like isn't it more important to the kid to have a mother that's
00:08:43.600 present and has her own that's why covered came in place because that's why we have hybrids so mommy 1.00
00:08:48.160 worked three times a week she's in the office two times a week she's at home and as much as you know
00:08:53.680 what like the society we live in london cost of livings are increasing i have to work and the thing is
00:08:59.200 i'm not a lazy individual i want to work i want to i promise you that my partner is a person that
00:09:06.640 wants me to be at home and raise the kids and i will do that i will be as efficient as i can be
00:09:11.920 but i still have to get my own i have so what if he said hey babe i really want you to be home with
00:09:17.280 the kids i quit your job you're submissive right 100 i'll do that for my husband absolutely i guess what
00:09:23.680 so you're in i would do that till they reach 18 and i'm back at work oh then you're back at work
00:09:28.480 absolutely okay my degree never expired i have a law degree you would you would give it up for
00:09:32.800 the family though absolutely okay family first always you just made it you made it sound like
00:09:37.360 you wouldn't no no i would i would i was like girl do you have any girls want to stay at home no no i
00:09:42.480 would but the thing is my partner gives me that option he says you know when we do have kids to you
00:09:46.800 but i'm like yeah yeah small small which you know i mean but if it got to a place where he said
00:09:52.240 serious conversation i want you to be iron with the children i'd say okay till they reach a certain
00:09:57.600 amount of age then i want to go back to work i do i don't want to be bored at home baking cakes
00:10:03.520 and i feel like it's personal preference as well um not every woman wants to do that but obviously
00:10:07.760 some women do like me personally as well i would want to do that as well i feel like it's always good 0.90
00:10:11.600 to have your eyes as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a
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