Order of Man - DAVID DEIDA ｜ Primal Power, Boundless Sex, and Freedom Beyond Ambition

00:00:00.400 Most of us were raised to believe that a man is defined by what he chases, the money, the 1.00

00:00:06.540 women, the title, the next goal, and for a big part of life, that's exactly right.

00:00:13.280 You should be hungry and you should be building.

00:00:15.960 But what happens when you get there?

00:00:18.140 When the goal is hit, the purpose fulfills itself, and you're left standing there asking

00:00:24.100 now what, which is a question a lot of men have asked.

00:00:27.580 a lot of these guys also make the mistake and mistake that moment for depression but my guest

00:00:34.300 today says it actually might be a doorway David Deada wrote the way of the superior man nearly

00:00:40.380 30 years ago and it's quite literally shaped a generation of men including me but in his newest

00:00:46.780 book the man of zero it picks up where that one left off and today we talk about the difference

00:00:52.200 between living from lack and living from fullness.

00:00:57.700 Why surrendering to God is not weakness,

00:01:00.520 but a code bigger than you.

00:01:03.140 How a warrior can do hard things with an open heart

00:01:06.100 and why the less you chase women in world,

00:01:09.140 as he calls it, the more they come to you.

00:01:11.300 Guys, this one goes very, very deep.

00:01:13.560 Let's get into it.

00:01:14.720 You're a man of action.

00:01:16.120 You live life to the fullest.

00:01:17.660 Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.

00:01:20.340 When life knocks you down,

00:01:21.600 You get back up one more time. Every time. You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.

00:01:30.120 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become at the end of the day.

00:01:35.560 And after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:01:40.140 Men, welcome to the Order of Man podcast. I am your host and founder, Ryan Michler.

00:01:44.460 Thank you for tuning in for the first time or for the hundredth or thousandth time.

00:01:48.940 it's the reason we do this work so I can give you the tools information resources and in this

00:01:57.000 podcast in particular the knowledge that you need from my over 800 podcast guests at this point and

00:02:04.120 I've got a great one lined up for you today a lot of you are very familiar with this man's work

00:02:08.860 and we're going to get into that shortly but before I do another thing that you should be

00:02:13.380 familiar with is the work over at Montana knife company. Now they're sponsors of ours, but more

00:02:19.060 than that, they're friends of mine. I've broken bread with them. We've trained together. I've

00:02:25.460 toured their facilities multiple times. We've hunted together. I mean, you name it, we've done

00:02:30.760 it. And I cannot think of a better knife manufacturer than my good friends over at

00:02:36.360 Montana knife company. And one of the best things is they're making all of their knives 100% in

00:02:41.240 america just outside of missoula montana so if you're looking for a good quality durable strong

00:02:47.420 american-made knife maybe you've got a hunt coming up maybe you are a culinary wizard and you need a

00:02:53.640 good knife to be able to hone those skills in the kitchen or something that you need for an everyday

00:02:58.160 carry i would highly highly check out uh or suggest that you check out montana knife company

00:03:04.020 i also suggest you use the code order of man when you check out because you will save some money

00:03:09.600 when you do. All right, montananifecompany.com. Use the code ORDEROFMAN. Now, let me introduce

00:03:15.940 you to a man who might not need an introduction. David Data is one of the most influential and

00:03:22.040 probably provocative teachers on masculinity, intimacy, and spiritual growth for the last

00:03:29.540 three decades now. He has 11 books, including the international bestseller, The Way of the

00:03:35.140 Superior Man, Dear Lover, The Enlightened Sex Manual, and his newest book, which we talk about

00:03:40.880 today, The Man of Zero, A Guide to Primal Power, Boundless Sex, and The Freedom Beyond Ambition.

00:03:48.400 They've been published in more than 35 languages. He has been named to walk in spiritual 100 list

00:03:54.900 of the world's most spiritually influential living people for more than 15 years now.

00:03:59.480 But before writing for a general audience, Data worked as a researcher in psychobiology, neuroscience, and evolutionary psychology.

00:04:09.460 He taught and conducted research at UC San Diego School of Medicine, UC Santa Cruz, San Jose State, Boston Lexington Institute, and the Ecole Polytechnique in Paris.

00:04:21.920 He was also a founding member of the Integral Institute.

00:04:25.120 he's practiced yoga and tai chi and meditation since 1975 and guys he rarely gives interviews

00:04:32.920 and he offers all of his books his audio teachings free chapter by chapter and you

00:04:38.260 can find that over at dieta.info men enjoy this special conversation

00:04:43.780 david what an honor to have you on man i'm so excited to talk with you and as i told you before

00:04:49.460 we hit record. I was so excited when I saw your team reach out and definitely wanted to make this

00:04:55.500 work. So thanks for joining me today. Thank you, Ryan. I'm happy to be here. I wanted to start

00:04:59.820 because you've got a new book. It's called Man of Zero. And I think a lot of the guys listening to

00:05:04.480 this podcast are probably very familiar with your previous work because I've talked about it a lot.

00:05:12.240 Way of the Superior Man is the one that immediately comes to mind. But I'm very curious how over the

00:05:17.760 past three decades, your perception and your views on masculinity have maybe stayed the same

00:05:24.520 and maybe how they've changed between the two works that you have out right now that we're

00:05:29.820 talking about? Well, I wrote The Way of the Superior Man roughly 30 years ago, as you said,

00:05:34.640 and The Man of Zero is just recently released this year. I think what happens during that time is

00:05:42.880 my understanding just deepened my practices deepened i write about what i practice i write

00:05:49.780 about what i live i i'm not a theorist i'm not prescribing men like how they should live i am

00:05:57.220 suggesting a set of experiments to men to live to try these experiments and see how they turn out

00:06:03.040 if it's in the direction that they want to go um in the way the superior man decades ago i was

00:06:10.200 mostly working both in my own life and in other men's lives with becoming the best man possible

00:06:16.780 the best version of themselves that's what I meant by superior man not of course superior to

00:06:21.760 other people or superior to women or anything like that but just their own superior self

00:06:26.160 their best version and that involved knowing their purpose being clear on their purpose how

00:06:33.020 to live their purpose how to relate to women from a place of love and relaxation rather than

00:06:39.720 defensiveness and trauma. It was a kind of description of ways to experiment living and to

00:06:47.880 see how it turned out in life such that your life got better. So you were earning a living doing what

00:06:54.380 you love to do or earning a living so you could do what you love to do. But in any case, you were

00:07:00.200 living your love. You were living what you really were here to do. You had a deep sense of purpose

00:07:06.940 and direction and you were aware if you wavered from that I mean all men have a certain degree

00:07:15.100 of fear that we inherit and accumulate so when we feel that fear it might tilt us away from our

00:07:20.560 true purpose so part of the book was about how to work with fear how to kind of lean just beyond

00:07:26.800 the fear but not too much that it's we can't handle it and we collapsed so it's a very practical book

00:07:33.520 about working with women, working with the world, working with your purpose, earning a living.

00:07:38.880 30 years later now, I wrote The Man of Zero because I've worked with a lot of those men

00:07:44.300 and myself over those 30 years. And what I found is that if you live your purpose long enough,

00:07:50.140 the purpose dissolves. Whether you succeed or fail, you outgrow the purpose. So you might

00:07:58.320 outgrow a sequence of purposes. You might have a, you know, you might want to make a lot of money

00:08:05.260 and then you make a lot of money and then you go, okay, now what? So then maybe you say, I want to

00:08:10.300 create a family or I want to create an organization that helps people. And then you do that. And maybe

00:08:17.280 after 10 or 15 years, or maybe right away, you do that and you feel like, okay, now what? And so

00:08:23.980 what happens is if you live your depth if you embody the deepest truth that you can embody

00:08:31.200 the way you're expressing it fulfills itself and dissolves and you're left over and over again with

00:08:39.160 a sense I call it zero it's just it's just being without a motive it's being even without hope

00:08:46.640 um and so i noticed that a lot of men confused that with depression so because they were so

00:08:55.780 identified with their purpose when that purpose dissolved they felt like now what who am i and

00:09:02.720 they collapsed in depression and what i realized in my life and others is that you don't have to

00:09:09.420 collapse you could stay without a purpose you can relax without collapsing you can simply be

00:09:15.940 being or who you are at your deepest place there's different words for that that people might use

00:09:21.700 and being that your life takes a complete shift so instead of then being motivated

00:09:30.200 motivated by a sense of purpose like accomplishment goals and so forth you're living more spontaneously

00:09:37.500 obviously from a kind of ongoing creativity that that being is creative the whole world is being

00:09:45.940 created from that every thought you have is coming from that being you know nobody knows what they're

00:09:50.720 about to think nobody knows what's going to happen next in the world we live in a really honestly in

00:09:57.280 a state of i don't know um coming from that place of unknowing if we don't collapse if we don't

00:10:04.700 contract our solar plexus if we don't collapse our breath if we don't uh you know just watch tv

00:10:12.300 and use drugs and you know collapse our life then what happens is we spontaneously find ourselves

00:10:20.980 creating something that we may never have planned that we don't even know and that spontaneous

00:10:25.840 creation rather than goal-driven motivation becomes a different way of living i call it

00:10:32.960 the way of zero and the man who lives that way is the man of zero and so this new book the man

00:10:39.080 of zero is four men who have come to the place where they realize maybe they once were highly

00:10:45.220 motivated maybe they were very successful but now even if they have a family that is you know

00:10:52.580 beautiful family that they love good relationships with say their wife and kids and their friends and

00:10:58.020 maybe they've been very successful or creative in the world and done what they've wanted to

00:11:02.440 they are still it's like they're alive but with no motive they're alive without their duty free

00:11:11.320 they've done their duty now there's i'm not talking about the day-to-day duties of you know

00:11:16.260 eating right and exercising and making money and treating people well i'm talking about a deep

00:11:24.100 sense like you feel like okay i'm i've done it i'm done and that sense of being done and i call it

00:11:31.060 done with woman and world in the book i just use that phrase woman and world since that's

00:11:35.960 what men tend to feel they're doing so when they're done in that sense with women and world

00:11:43.740 but not collapsing so they're careful not to collapse in depression they just simply be the

00:11:49.460 being they are when they're done that spontaneously then begins to be a creative life from that place

00:11:57.440 of being that's very spontaneous and unpredictable. Again, it's not spontaneous in the sense of

00:12:03.220 being a hippie or a street person or something like that. It's spontaneous in the sense that

00:12:08.980 you're not targeting a goal. You're finding out how the universe wants to live through you

00:12:15.320 as it happens. Like, wow, you know, this is what's happening. So that's how I would describe

00:12:20.220 the way the secure man and the man of zero. Do you, do you feel like, so you talk about

00:12:26.640 maybe not so much goal driven. It's interesting when I hear guys say, uh, old, older gentlemen,

00:12:32.680 typically we'll say things like, Oh, you know, I, I should have taken more time for my family.

00:12:36.840 I should have, I've should have done these things instead of work so hard. And my knee jerk reaction

00:12:41.900 is, well, that's easy for you to say now because you might be financially successful. You might

00:12:47.460 have achieved the goals that you're talking about. And so, yeah, when I'm, when I'm 60 years old,

00:12:52.520 I hope that I can say that too. But in the moment it's like, well, yeah, I do have to work. I do

00:12:57.840 have to pursue ambitions. Of course I want to take care of my people, my family, my friends,

00:13:03.700 my clients. Um, do you find that when you talk about a state of being, is it a maturity based

00:13:11.040 thing? Or I also think that if you, if you say to yourself, what I want to be a good man, let's say

00:13:17.560 that can also be goal-driven, right? What does a good man look like and how does he show up?

00:13:22.360 and what does he do and how does he perform and what does he help other people with that is

00:13:27.600 goal-driven I would say yes to be a good to try to be a good man or to have even an ideal or a

00:13:33.240 vision of what a good man is that is what I call the way of the superior man um the being I'm

00:13:37.580 talking about in the way of zero you no longer are motivated to be a good man or a bad man

00:13:43.000 you just have no you just are you find yourself merely being I don't know how to put words on it

00:13:51.540 you know, that's why I wrote a book about it. So do you feel like when, when you move into that

00:13:56.180 stage of just being who you are, neither good nor bad, um, does that, you talked about something

00:14:02.780 interesting. You said a series of experiments, and I wish more men knew that because barring

00:14:08.280 brain surgery or, you know, um, some life or life or death altercation, there's not really,

00:14:15.360 especially in our modern times, a whole lot of dire circumstances if you mess up because you

00:14:21.920 started a business, let's say, for example. I guess what I'm asking is, do you feel like

00:14:28.920 pursuing those things is going to be a detriment based on what you're talking about with Man of

00:14:38.820 zero uh no no and driven that way or i think those goals and drives are completely appropriate

00:14:47.840 for much of a man's life um basically as long as you feel you have a goal or you wish you have a

00:14:57.340 goal you should live on those goals you should live on those purpose i'm talking about a state

00:15:03.160 that's not desirable nor non-desirable it's just what ends up when you have fully lived your

00:15:08.600 purpose now it could be in other ways you could come to zero for instance these days people come

00:15:15.980 to zero i would say maybe prematurely sometimes from taking psychedelics or something like that

00:15:21.660 they may have a they may be young they may be 20 or something and take psychedelics and come to

00:15:28.840 realize that reality itself is like a dream it's hard it's our it's you know brain function however

00:15:36.200 you want to describe it it's not a it's not a solid thing they thought that it was and therefore

00:15:41.500 they might say so now what what do i do there's nothing this isn't even real in a way and they

00:15:48.940 could come to a premature place of i have no motive because what is all of this anyways it's

00:15:56.300 nothing really it's a figment and again in the book that sounds more like pessimism to me then

00:16:03.440 it could i think it's a general disdain of the world i think there's a lot of young men

00:16:07.940 who are just mad at the world and and there's reasons why i would understand that but i think

00:16:13.700 there's a lot of young men who are just generally mad but that's not what you're talking about

00:16:17.660 you're definitely not satisfying and and whole almost is what i'm hearing you say well your

00:16:23.420 heart is at peace it's certainly not mad so if your heart is mad if you're mad at the world

00:16:28.960 that would be a very different thing that's what i'm talking about at zero um but but there are

00:16:34.900 young men or you know people who have come to a place it could be through psychedelics as i

00:16:40.820 mentioned it could be through meditation it could be just through chance it could be through

00:16:44.360 whatever seeing ai is better than them at doing almost everything so people could come to the

00:16:51.240 place of okay um now what like what's left i think in the bible in ecclesiastes is like vanity of

00:17:00.220 vanities like it's so meaningless like there's you could come to that place through religion you

00:17:05.980 could come to that place through prayer you could come to that place through all kinds of things

00:17:10.760 what the man of zero is about is how to live from that place without falling into as you just said

00:17:16.120 traps such as pessimism nihilism depression um those are not what i'm talking about and in the

00:17:23.360 book i take great pains to try to differentiate those states from the way of being that i'm

00:17:28.300 i'm trying to describe it's very easy to conflate that it's very easy to think that because i have

00:17:34.780 no personal motive anymore life sucks or i'm angry i'm left this way or whatever and that is

00:17:43.460 as you said it's not what i'm hoping to indicate in the book it is interesting because i've um

00:17:49.760 i've had this experience and it might come with a little bit more gray in my beard and a little

00:17:53.940 less hair on top but i've i've i've thought to myself i just want to say yes to more things i

00:18:02.320 if somebody comes to me if for example you invited me uh and you said hey ryan uh why don't we go

00:18:08.580 uh dive with sharks next month like yes i want to do that absolutely um but i think so many men

00:18:18.140 young men and old men alike cut themselves off to opportunities because they are pursuing

00:18:25.940 this this goal this dream they're relentless and i and i appreciate that i respect that

00:18:32.860 but it leaves no room for nuance it leaves no room for excitement or opportunity that they

00:18:40.700 didn't see before and that's kind of what i'm hearing you say am i am i understanding that

00:18:44.380 correctly i believe so um i'll give a try at describing it and tell me if if we are on the

00:18:51.060 same page here or something um so to me there's a part of you and whatever we call that part is fine

00:19:00.160 we could call it being we could call it your soul we could call it your depth of awareness

00:19:04.620 we could call it your deep self we could there's different words we could use to refer to that none

00:19:09.780 of them are adequate they're all misleading in their own way but I will say like you the deepest

00:19:16.400 part of rhyme that your deep self whatever again we want to call that that's there whether you're

00:19:22.420 diving with sharks or mountain climbing or sitting on a couch at home or eating food you know it's

00:19:30.000 always there. It's what you call I or what I would call you. You know, that sense of being is

00:19:37.060 continuous through all experience. So for any human right now, all they have to feel is that

00:19:42.860 their experiences, what they're seeing, what they're hearing, what they're thinking, you know,

00:19:48.340 the experience of swimming with sharks, the experiences of making love, the experiences of

00:19:53.200 raising a family, they all come and go. They come and go second by second, but they also come and

00:19:59.040 go throughout a life and the sense of i remains through that you say i raised a family i swam

00:20:06.220 with sharks i so that deeper sense of i is a continuous or permanent and when you feel into

00:20:14.640 it it's actually non it's not in time it's always there so we call it eternal if we wanted but

00:20:19.760 so that sense of i is always there it's always here you know when we say i and then our experience

00:20:27.820 fluctuates in fact we could fall asleep and go into dreams and there's even an eye in the dream

00:20:33.640 so i is in the dream and if we're really sensitive there's a kind of experience less

00:20:40.640 eye and deep sleep um but there's no time there because there's no experience that might be a

00:20:47.080 little esoteric for people but it's easy to again experiment and find out but that sense of eyes

00:20:52.840 continues through all experience have you could be on a heavy psychedelics you could be dreaming

00:20:58.020 you could be conked on the head and that sense of i like when in deep sleep even if the alarm goes

00:21:04.720 off suddenly you i hear it who's hearing it something's there you might not be aware it's

00:21:11.420 there when you're sleeping because there's no experience but as soon as something like the

00:21:16.140 alarm clock or or maybe your child crying or your dog sniffing you or something you know you wake up

00:21:22.140 and because you were there or you couldn't have been aware of anything you wouldn't have been

00:21:26.520 aware of the alarm clock so that awareness is always it's the only part of any experience

00:21:33.300 that's always there you can gain and lose money you could gain and lose a family you could gain

00:21:39.740 and lose pain and pleasure and houses and cars and but what's always there is that steep sense

00:21:46.480 of I well what the man of zero is is relaxing into or even as that deep sense of I so even as

00:21:55.960 experience is fluttering by swimming with sharks you're making love you're hiking a mountain you're

00:22:01.740 sitting on your butt you're you know all these things are happening and that deep sense of I

00:22:06.480 never changes it's always we could call it pure awareness if we wanted to it's aware of what's 0.97

00:22:12.480 happening it's aware if nothing's happening it's just an awareness kind of there now at first when

00:22:18.360 we're identified with our mind which is something we're aware of it's our thoughts and perceptions

00:22:23.920 and so forth at first when that goes to zero it feels kind of boring it feels like okay i'm just

00:22:30.960 be you know i'm just the eye nothing's happening but you if you give it a little time if you just

00:22:36.920 relaxes that eye you begin to realize that everything's emerging from that depth everything

00:22:42.760 it's the most potent creative thing or non-thing that there is that sense of that deep eye so what

00:22:51.820 the man of zero is about is resting as that deep eye or being that deep eye or abiding as that deep

00:22:59.520 eye and then finding out how experience emerges from that, which is a very different kind of life

00:23:07.740 than ignoring that deep eye and being lost in experience. You know, I'm making love now and

00:23:13.800 now I'm getting up and going to work and now I'm taking care of the kids. It's one thing after

00:23:17.920 another. And eventually it could be very suddenly or gradually that kind of becomes tedious. You

00:23:24.220 begin to feel like okay you know night day night day night day night day you know earned money go

00:23:31.340 to sleep make love earn money you know just you're going all of this is happening and under it there

00:23:37.360 is this deep eye but most people tend to ignore it and even though it's the most essential so it's

00:23:43.280 the only thing you can't take away without losing you it's the deepest you so the man of zero is

00:23:51.220 four men who have come to the place where following their attention or following experience

00:23:57.420 or even any experience is not as interesting as that deep eye now the experiences continue

00:24:07.060 but you your home base is the the deep open endless creative eye all right guys i'm going

00:24:16.680 step away from the conversation very quickly. Um, in the discussion that David and I are having,

00:24:21.400 he's talked about living from, from fullness instead of from lack, but you can't really get

00:24:27.520 there alone. And you can't really get there, frankly, by just reading about it. You get there

00:24:32.860 by doing work week in and week out with men who will call you on your crap and also stand by you 0.98

00:24:39.880 when things get hard as life has a tendency of doing sometimes. And that's what the iron council 0.86

00:24:44.700 is. It's our brotherhood of men who refuse to drift in life. When you join, you'll be placed

00:24:50.500 on a battle team with other men who are serious about them getting better and helping you get

00:24:55.160 better. You'll build a battle plan for your health and your relationships and your work and your

00:25:00.640 legacy. And you'll also be held accountable to it. No fluff, no hype, no rah-rah, no cheering,

00:25:06.840 just hundreds and hundreds of men doing real work inside of the council, challenging each other to

00:25:13.660 step up and do better be better fathers husbands business owners community community leaders etc

00:25:18.860 so now we're we we only open the door excuse me let me say it this way we are going to close the

00:25:25.020 doors uh october 31st yes october 31st so that gives you to the end of the week

00:25:31.340 because right now we're open but we close friday again october 31st and when they do

00:25:36.560 those doors are going to stay closed until the next enrollment which is likely going to be the

00:25:41.820 end of the year. So if you've been on the fence and you've wondered how you might make the best

00:25:47.500 quarter of your life and rolling into 2027, the best year ever, head to orderofman.com

00:25:53.280 slash iron council. It's orderofman.com slash iron council. You can get signed up and join us

00:25:59.500 and I will see you inside for the best finish to a year ever. I've got a lot of questions. So

00:26:06.360 there's two in particular that come to mind and we, and I want to wrestle with both of them. So

00:26:09.820 one is is the eye when you're when you're describing it what what i hear or how i would

00:26:17.720 define it would be my soul that's how i would define it okay you know for so for example i'm

00:26:23.460 i'm a hunter and when i sit in a tree stand and i watch deer at 40 yards below me i don't know

00:26:32.540 that they had i do know they do not have the same eye that we're talking about they're based on

00:26:37.700 instinct. They're based on survival. I don't think they have a level of depth that we have.

00:26:44.700 They don't have awareness of themselves. They have awareness of the environment. Sure. But not

00:26:49.300 awareness of themselves. And I think that's what differentiates us. So I kind of want to talk on

00:26:54.260 that a little bit. And then my, the other thing I want to ask about, and I'm saying this with all

00:26:59.340 due respect to you and your work is the man of zero, a luxury reserved for the,

00:27:07.700 mature men who have their let's say financial needs taken care of which question do you want

00:27:14.520 to work with first i'm game let's go let's awesome let's go to let's go to the soul conversation

00:27:19.900 first there's no way to know a lot of this for me is an i don't know it's it's just you know we

00:27:29.440 could do our best but given that like as the baseline of sharing with you that really none

00:27:34.800 of us could know um so when we when we look into a deer's eyes um so i i i don't hunt much but i

00:27:47.760 fish a lot i've grown up fishing my father took me fishing and um there's a period of time where

00:27:55.100 i would fish a river uh it was freshwater river and catch bass and i would some of these bass

00:28:02.440 i could just you know i did catch and release and i would catch them i would look into their eyes

00:28:08.240 and clearly as you say they didn't think like me they weren't you know their mind clearly was the

00:28:16.980 best time not like my mind but they were aware they looked at me if i moved my hand toward them

00:28:24.140 they they would move like they were aware and that awareness is what i'm talking about the

00:28:31.540 very awareness that is shared with all beings that i'm aware of again there's an i don't know

00:28:38.420 like i don't know how far that extends there are lots of experiments that show that plants are

00:28:43.700 aware of their surroundings that they react if you put a pole next to a plant to grow them

00:28:48.680 it'll start growing toward the pole so how does it know where the even even words i've even heard

00:28:54.840 that the positive and negative words will impact how a plant grows which is pretty wild to me

00:29:00.900 actually. Well, that gets into your question. I mean, so I agree that there's a human soul that's

00:29:07.300 unique or whatever we want to call that. I would call it mind, but there's a human aspect that's

00:29:13.980 uniquely human. But that doesn't mean that all of these living beings don't have some aspect of

00:29:21.220 awareness. In fact, I would say that most science shows that even the most rudimentary single cell

00:29:28.420 organism learns you could be conditioned to behave a certain way it has memory so I would say that

00:29:38.880 awareness itself finds its way through different structures and those structures have different

00:29:44.660 levels of complexity humans at this point might be the most complex maybe AI is going to supersede

00:29:51.860 us because AI is going to include all the humans holding on to their iPhones or whatever exists then

00:29:56.460 And it's going to be much bigger than any single human.

00:29:59.420 So it's very, it's almost like, I mean, everything's a cyborg, right?

00:30:03.340 There's, there's technology and biology mixed together.

00:30:06.040 I mean, even, even on the side, I mean, I've got my watch on my Garmin watch.

00:30:10.240 I've got my phone in my pocket.

00:30:11.440 We're conversing through this digital device, which is my digital eyeballs.

00:30:15.580 Like it's pretty incredible.

00:30:17.440 Exactly.

00:30:18.080 So that's awareness, if you will, running through all of that.

00:30:21.340 We're aware, you and I are aware of each other through this technology right now.

00:30:26.460 So that I would say that what I'm talking about is being zero is that depth of awareness.

00:30:34.200 So you could, and I have or do, commune with non-humans.

00:30:40.720 I mean, sometimes people have deeper communion with their animal friends.

00:30:45.160 I know many people who have a closer relationship to their dogs or cats or horses or something

00:30:50.560 than they do with any human.

00:30:52.280 I mean, so I do think it's possible to notice the oneness with or commune with.

00:31:00.080 I mean, if we want to use a different word, we could call that love, that feeling, that awareness in another.

00:31:05.100 It doesn't mean you're namby-pamby.

00:31:07.880 In good martial arts, you love your opponent and you neutralize them.

00:31:13.200 You know, you could love, somebody could be coming to attack you and your family, let's say, you know,

00:31:18.780 and your life or your family's life is literally threatened you know they could die and you could

00:31:24.360 look into the eyes of this attacker and feel their awareness like i am you we are this awareness and 1.00

00:31:31.980 i need to kill you and i need to neutralize you because you're going to kill my family so 0.90

00:31:36.200 there's not a problem in taking strong action with other beings just because we share that depth of 1.00

00:31:45.240 being i would go so far as to say we share that depth of being with everyone maybe even everything

00:31:50.440 but that doesn't mean we don't protect ourselves or act offensively at times you know in the

00:31:57.480 offense i mean you know take first strike so there's lots of ways of living so you could love

00:32:04.600 your opponent i would say that good martial arts teach that like to combine yourself with an

00:32:09.340 opponent to love them to feel them to be them and then to neutralize their body to to so

00:32:15.160 i we might just be using these words slightly different like soul so i would totally agree

00:32:22.360 that the human whatever we want to call it soul or mind is different than a plant obviously or

00:32:28.200 an animal but i also think that there's a kind of awareness if you look into the eyes of an animal

00:32:34.200 for instance that is clearly there and it's different when the animal dies it's not there

00:32:40.520 and so there's a they're there and that is what i'm calling being again now most people skip over

00:32:49.080 that for the changing stuff the perceptions the sensations of life but if you just take a moment

00:32:57.180 and pause and feel that depth of being it's very potent in fact it is the source of everything

00:33:04.280 you're experiencing right now right now you are being that you are aware right or you wouldn't

00:33:10.300 be able to have this conversation so you are that awareness now but we forget it and when we forget

00:33:19.040 that we are also that depth of being or awareness then we get lost in events or i call it woman in

00:33:25.800 world in the man of zero book and we get lost in that ongoing ever-changing this and that and

00:33:33.040 of of life of events and most men at some point go okay is this it is this all there is like one

00:33:41.080 thing after another and i'm in the book i'm suggesting like well that one thing after another

00:33:47.500 continues and you meet it with impeccability you know you meet it with integrity but you also are

00:33:54.660 sourced in that being that is the same being that you could see in a deer's eyes or in a bass's eyes

00:34:00.780 or if you're sensitive perhaps walking in a forest feeling it in the plants so that depth of being is

00:34:08.100 kind of universal whereas your unique expression of that is unique it's your fingerprint of life

00:34:16.120 it's your unique contribution it's your specific gift I'm not sure if we're getting to what you

00:34:22.000 were asking about or talking about relative to soul i'm just riffing on it with you no it's good

00:34:27.860 and i'm actually just curious but i'm actually i'm glad you brought it up because as you were

00:34:31.820 talking about it i was like wait well wait a second and i'm reminded of one experience that

00:34:35.840 i've had that i had uh this was years ago um i shot a deer and i was in hawaii i was on the

00:34:43.440 island of molokai and i shot a deer with my bow and i may i didn't make a great shot but i did

00:34:48.660 hit her and uh i hit her pretty far back and i ended up i could tell i ended up either hitting

00:34:55.020 her spine or hips but she was paralyzed at that point but still alive and i waited and i thought

00:35:01.580 well maybe she'll die and i just waited a little while and clearly that wasn't happening and she

00:35:05.820 was suffering so i got out of my position and i walked up 50 yards and uh she this is this is

00:35:12.420 kind of brutal and graphic but i think it illustrates the point that i didn't consider

00:35:16.240 until you talked about this. She was, she was crawling with her front legs away from me. 0.97

00:35:22.820 And I walked up to her and I felt so horrible because I had to put her out of her misery. 0.99

00:35:29.200 And right before I did, she looked up at me and she made this horrible noise and she looked right

00:35:38.260 into my soul. And at the same time, I was doing the right thing. And I appreciate you saying that

00:35:45.620 we can have humanity we can we can have empathy and understanding and and and realize and embrace

00:35:50.660 the humanity of everything we're going through and also do our job yes and it was so i i i didn't

00:35:59.240 think about that till you said it and that gives me a different perspective that's interesting

00:36:03.480 i don't have a question it was just it's just something that came up when you were talking

00:36:07.320 about that yeah i think that's beautiful i think as we become more sensitive to that depth we feel

00:36:13.460 that more and more. We feel that in all beings, in all creatures, in all people, whether we hate

00:36:21.180 them or love them, whether we have to protect ourselves from them or neutralize them, whether

00:36:25.060 we choose to live with them or their enemies, we can still feel that. And that adds a dimension of

00:36:32.040 being. Then even though we may, as you say, have to do our job, we do our job with love or we do

00:36:39.360 our job with integrity there's a kind of natural integrity like in that moment of looking the

00:36:44.140 deer's eyes there's a kind of natural integrity and almost an obligation to life i don't know i

00:36:49.840 mean still you have to say you know you have to put it out of its misery but you're not doing it 1.00

00:36:55.300 from an asshole point of view you know you're not just like right kill the fucking thing yeah it's 0.99

00:37:00.000 more of a heart to heart you know i mean i'm putting weird words on it but it's kind of like 1.00

00:37:04.940 I love you. And now I need to kill you for everybody's sake, for your sake, for my sake. 0.99

00:37:09.520 And so you, it's a soft hearted act, even though it is a life ending act for the deer. 0.99

00:37:18.500 So I think that those are very compatible. And I think at a human level, our relationships would

00:37:24.600 shift if we live that more, our wars would shift. I mean, it would shift at many levels. We would

00:37:30.640 still have to protect ourselves we'd still have to defend our families and all of that

00:37:35.080 no doubt about it i mean there are people who are distorted people who have very destructive

00:37:41.220 tendencies who are genetically destructive who are politically destructive who have beliefs about

00:37:46.960 killing other people so we may have to do our job as you say relative to those destructive

00:37:53.700 tendencies and others but that doesn't mean we can't also love them while we're doing our job

00:37:58.260 i think we actually it's it's i'm glad that you're putting words to this because i think a lot of men

00:38:03.540 experience this without being able to articulate it and i'll take a couple of examples and these

00:38:08.740 are highly fictionalized characters so i want to throw that disclaimer out there but you take

00:38:14.220 william wallace in the movie braveheart or you take maximus in in the movie gladiator these are

00:38:20.800 men who are warriors they're they're deadly they're extremely capable and yet they're driven

00:38:28.040 william wallace depicted in in the movie braveheart is is driven by an eternal love for

00:38:36.380 for the woman that he he loves uh exactly maximus is the exact same thing driven by an eternal love

00:38:43.260 for his family his wife and his young son and yet they're still doing what needs to be done but

00:38:48.740 they're doing it from a different position and we as men are inspired but why are we inspired by that

00:38:54.840 because it resides in us that's exactly i would that's exactly what i was going to say that those

00:38:59.700 are great examples of what we're talking about and they resonate with us because of that like 0.96

00:39:04.160 they're not asshole dudes they're not superficial dudes just yippee you know like creating destruction

00:39:10.600 for the sake of destruction they're very deep men who are motivated by love and that does not 0.52

00:39:17.340 mean they're less of a warrior at all so i would say that those are you know examples if you will

00:39:26.480 of a kind of man of zero now he's their living purpose in the world they each had their own

00:39:31.820 context political context and so forth that they were working with but they were coming from that

00:39:36.560 place of love and i that's what i call the man of zero so instead of coming from a place of pure

00:39:42.480 purpose like i want to make a bunch of money or i want four children in a big house or you know

00:39:49.260 instead of that they're the love inside of them love for their family for their wife for life

00:39:55.680 itself but people most artists are motivated by love you know they're they're painting or making

00:40:02.000 music from love if you can use that word you know that's what makes them great artists we listen to

00:40:07.000 the music and it resonates with us. Or we watch these movies of these great men who are coming

00:40:12.880 from depth. They're deep men. They're not fighting for superficial personal reasons. And

00:40:19.020 that is what I call the way of zero in the man of zero. So those are, I love those examples and 0.52

00:40:26.300 I'm glad you brought them up. I'm interested in, and I do want to get the other question that I

00:40:31.000 posed earlier, but this concept of woman and world, what's interesting in my experience and

00:40:37.840 either just personally, anecdotally, what I've seen of other men, when we chase those things,

00:40:43.400 those thing, if I'm out in the woods and I'm chasing a deer, a deer is going to run away from

00:40:47.800 me. Like it's just, that's, what's going to happen. Um, and I think what happens with woman

00:40:54.360 and world, and I'm curious to go into the depth of this, but when we chase them, pursue those

00:40:58.860 things sometimes they run from us but i found it it's ironic and it's interesting that the more

00:41:04.180 that i become aware of myself the more i become whole the more i try to live within my principles

00:41:12.340 and and lean towards my relationship with god and the less that i worry about

00:41:20.120 woman and world to use that term the more attractive i am to women in the world which

00:41:28.300 is kind of a cruel irony you know what i mean well it's a principle it's not an irony i mean

00:41:34.280 that's the whole subject of the man of zero that the it's true in hunting i've hunted a little not

00:41:40.300 much like you but just be the best way to hunt is not to be putting out a lot of energy but to

00:41:48.860 actually relax in your being and let them come to you let and that's true in in everyday life also 1.00

00:41:57.060 that women in world in a sense if we want to anthropomorphize it it's they're attracted to 0.92

00:42:04.440 that depth of truth or that depth of peace in your heart or that depth of love that you're that you 0.66

00:42:11.500 are so yes the the more you can abide as being and still function the more things go effortlessly

00:42:21.680 the sign of the man of zero is they live much more effortlessly with they live with less effort 0.99

00:42:29.460 than the man of zero than the superior man phase and the superior man phase you're busting ass 0.86

00:42:35.700 you're getting up early you're exercising you're going to work you start shrinking you push 0.82

00:42:40.340 yourself you have goals you have benchmarks you're measuring yourself against benchmarks

00:42:44.080 and that's incredibly useful for that period of life in fact it's the only way to do it you have

00:42:49.720 to go you know this week i want to accomplish this you know but in the next two hours i want

00:42:53.980 to accomplish this is very useful way to live as a superior man but for the man of zero it's

00:42:59.700 how deeply can i relax and effortful effortlessness while staying functional so you don't like put

00:43:08.100 away the gun you're sitting in the hide or wherever you are and you're relaxing as you're

00:43:11.920 but you're ready it's like that state i talked about in deep sleep where as soon as the alarm

00:43:15.880 goes off you hear it you respond to it yet the moment before it went off you were hardly there

00:43:21.400 there was no experience so it's that effortless being or effortless awareness which you always

00:43:28.720 are the beauty of it is that it is effortless even now as we're sitting here talking you are aware

00:43:35.520 i'm aware that there's this awareness that's always there and things are happening our voices

00:43:40.900 are happening but we don't have to do anything to be aware um that awareness is what is and

00:43:48.200 so you relax as what is and as you say that becomes attractive that is i would say the

00:43:55.080 most attractive thing now i talk about men's developments in terms of stages and in the first

00:44:01.820 stage you're trying to get more and more of something like more money more power more success

00:44:06.760 and the second stage you're trying to get better so like make yourself a better man and the superior

00:44:12.240 man make the world a better place make your house a better place to live make your country better

00:44:17.720 like you live to better but what I call the third stage is probably what you call your relationship

00:44:23.820 to God but it's living as a vessel it's living as a surrendered sacrifice to something larger than

00:44:29.440 you that comes through you you're no longer trying to get more and more you're no longer

00:44:34.500 merely trying to better things you but you open yourself to become a kind of living vessel for

00:44:41.400 whatever you want to call it god is a great word for it but some people don't like it so we can say

00:44:45.840 the universe coming through you but it is god it's it's the unspeakable coming through you

00:44:51.940 it's the unquantifiable it's that which is alive as all of us and so we open ourselves and we're

00:44:58.260 lived by that and that being lived by that is a much more feeling of a kind of surrender to a power

00:45:07.440 than it is a i'm in charge these are my goals i'm going to push to gain them so that's a big shift

00:45:15.680 from wanting more and more to wanting better and better to just giving yourself over to be used if

00:45:22.020 you will to be inhabited by a higher power by the depth of being or by love you know the i'm using

00:45:30.760 these words interchangeably and i know different men would call it different things which is fine

00:45:34.800 so yeah i would say that we develop stage by stage that way and a lot of people who are i looked at

00:45:41.860 your podcast to prepare for this a little bit and i think that you're teaching a lot of how to become

00:45:46.560 a better man how to live like a better man and i so i would say probably a lot of the men who

00:45:51.480 listen to this are in the stages between being a better and better man and then also surrendering

00:45:58.880 themselves to be lived by a higher power so they're not it's not so much trying to be better

00:46:04.820 but maybe you could say trying to be a better vessel but it's it's just it's really a matter

00:46:09.920 of trusting or something deeper than your typical mind and your typical thoughts and

00:46:15.600 being moved by that and I think that the more we as a whole of species are moved by that

00:46:23.920 the more love will rule the earth if you will and again I don't mean mamby-pamby kind of woo-woo

00:46:29.340 love I just mean knowing that you and I and everyone we know at heart are the same love

00:46:35.340 the same awareness that God if you will can dwell in all of our hearts but that doesn't mean that

00:46:41.660 our bodies don't need to be worked a certain way to be exercised a certain way or maybe other bodies

00:46:47.680 need to be neutralized because of their destructive patterns that they've inherited from maybe their

00:46:52.100 parents or their past so yeah so that development from more to better to a kind of surrender but

00:47:01.100 again not a weak flaccid surrender it's more of a surrender to a power to take over you it's more

00:47:06.140 power rather than less well it's interesting when guys because guys do often say or or express or

00:47:14.840 have this idea that surrendering to god so to speak we'll use that language just we all know

00:47:20.160 it's interchangeable maybe for certain people but a surrender to god is some form of weakness but

00:47:26.480 if i were to say live by a code they'd be like yes exactly i'm like well that's what i'm saying

00:47:32.440 like surrender to god is synonymous with live by a code but depending on the verbiage you use

00:47:39.600 it resonates differently with men yes i agree completely and but but live by a code usually

00:47:45.940 means a personal code whereas surrendering to god is non-per it's not you that you're

00:47:51.620 surrendering to it's not your personal code it's a code larger than you so it's still

00:47:56.640 but the process is the same yes it's an eternal code yes that's do you feel like david do you

00:48:04.120 feel like the sooner that i i don't know how you feel about if this if this comes across as

00:48:10.780 manipulation or gaming or whatever term you want to use but do you feel like the sooner or the

00:48:16.260 younger a man moves to this third stage that you're talking about where it's a surrender to

00:48:21.560 god that's the verbiage we're using do you think that he will be better off or is there a time and

00:48:27.100 place where it's i'm going to go out and get it second phase i'm going to improve third phase i'm

00:48:32.320 surrendering or should we all be regardless of where we are in our lives be moving towards that

00:48:37.600 third stage i think we all are but i think that that pacing varies from human to human and it to

00:48:45.140 me it's a mystery why some people get to that place very early in their life and some people

00:48:51.780 require let's say a lot of suffering before they can get to that place so that's me like i'm

00:48:58.100 dancing stupid so that's me well it's a lot of people you know we're all in the same journey

00:49:03.300 here so yeah i i don't think it's specified by an age but i do think that you know it could happen 0.99

00:49:11.920 at any time as i mentioned earlier it could happen through meditation it could happen through prayer

00:49:16.560 it can happen through psychedelic it could happen through great grief you could lose people you love

00:49:20.700 and you're just on your knees and there's nothing left for you and suddenly you're inhabited by this

00:49:27.900 greater being or higher power whatever so you you could come to that place of as we're talking

00:49:35.060 surrendering to God or surrendering to let God move you um at any point and so I don't think you

00:49:42.380 push it I don't think it's useful to push it because then you tend to fake it like there's

00:49:46.440 probably more people faking that surrender to God than really and it gives it a bad name right there

00:49:53.660 yeah so I wouldn't push it too hard but I think that when someone's ready it's the only way to

00:49:59.780 live when someone's ready you know when when we grow to that place of surrender is that just a

00:50:07.000 feeling that people experience is it like how i mean you talked about uh earlier how you know you

00:50:15.900 you kind of move through these stages you get to these stages you get to the point where you think

00:50:20.840 okay well something in my life has to change or i have to evolve how do you know that you're ready

00:50:27.580 to move into that stage of surrender or or becoming a man of zero because you have no choice

00:50:33.780 because you've done everything that you could do and it has not led to happiness it has not led to

00:50:38.840 peace in your heart there's still a kind of stress in your heart of what what's you know i'm missing

00:50:44.780 something here something's missing i'm feeling a sense of lack um the difference between the second

00:50:50.540 stage of better and better and the third stage of surrender is that sense of lack that there's

00:50:56.720 there's no sense of lack in the third stage or in that surrender you are filled or you are fullness

00:51:02.420 itself overflowing that overflowing becomes your actions but in the second stage you're still a

00:51:09.380 sense of lack there's a sense like if i had more discipline i can achieve this or if i was if i

00:51:17.320 can lift more weights if i was healthier if i made more money for my family there's a sense of lack

00:51:23.700 somehow that's still motivating you rather than a kind of sense of fillness that's overflowing

00:51:29.260 from you i've got a i've got a friend his name's kip sorenson he talks about this

00:51:34.700 this model of be do have versus have do be so most people operate the way he says it from this have

00:51:43.460 do be mentality. So if I have a million dollars, then I can do these cool experiences and then I

00:51:54.020 will be happy. And he says, flip it on its head, be happy, which will create the opportunities,

00:52:04.180 which is the do, you can do what you want to do. And then you will have exactly what you want to

00:52:09.680 have in life. And it's interesting because I see so many people and I I've done it. I do it now

00:52:14.920 still. It's like, oh man, I just need more podcast listeners, or I just need another $10,000, or I

00:52:21.880 just, you know, need to go on this vacation. But if we flip it on its head, and I think that's what

00:52:27.300 you're talking about, all of that other stuff starts to fall into place when we just decide,

00:52:31.920 hey, I'm going to be who I am and I'm going to have interesting experience or do interesting

00:52:37.240 experiences and then i'll have the abundance and prosperity in my life that i want yes um the only

00:52:43.160 refinement i would make in that i agree with that completely the only refinement i would make would

00:52:47.800 be that you can't just make that decision in my experience in my experience with other men like

00:52:53.560 a man could be happy just to start by being happy because if you're not if you don't have access to

00:53:01.440 that happiness um so let me like make a concrete example so let's take sex because we could use

00:53:11.500 money but let's use sex and money are usually the driving forces in most especially young men's life 0.90

00:53:17.000 so let's take sex for a moment um if you've never had sex or you've had very limited sexual

00:53:23.900 experience you might have a deep fascination you might be looking at women and girls if you're

00:53:28.600 young you know you're and you're you're excited by them and they're and you're attracted to them

00:53:33.680 and you're wondering like what are the possibilities here and you're you're highly motivated most men

00:53:38.460 at a young age especially are highly motivated sexually if they at that point just said okay

00:53:44.800 i'm just gonna be it would be a lie because they they're not just being they're being horny you

00:53:53.260 know their being and so to those men i would say live that horniness with integrity like don't deny

00:53:59.760 the horniness to be to start with the being do like date go out find women do what you need to

00:54:07.000 do but do it from the heart do it with integrity now after a period of time they may then say okay

00:54:13.840 i've had enough sex you know or or enough women or however they look at it what i want now is

00:54:21.620 better so they learn how and i'm describing some of my own past i really wanted to master sexuality

00:54:27.660 when i was younger so then you can then begin to go the superior man sexually like how do you have

00:54:33.580 sex in a way that opens your partner how do you open how do you experience that divine wholeness

00:54:40.260 during sex so instead of seeking it as you said through sex seeking it you're giving it you're 0.52

00:54:46.840 overflowing with it so then you go from you know wanting more and more sex or more and more women to 0.57

00:54:53.020 better and better like deeper and deeper sex or you know better sex more refined like you become 0.65

00:55:00.780 a master of sexuality if you want to you could learn those skills but then okay now you can

00:55:07.900 open in a depth of blissful communion with a woman or any woman or your chosen partner

00:55:15.040 um okay so like and then you come to a place where wait a second that being is there whether 0.92

00:55:24.320 i have sex or not it's there before i have sex it's there during sex it's there after sex 0.52

00:55:29.640 it's been there all of my life it's the only thing that's always there and so then even sex

00:55:35.100 itself becomes irrelevant now you still may enjoy sex but if sex doesn't happen

00:55:40.240 you're enjoying the moment if you will as much as if you had sex so it becomes one openness of

00:55:48.260 being one joy one loving awareness whether you're having sex or not whether you're having good sex 0.81

00:55:54.900 or bad sex whether you're celibate or polygamous like you the sexuality itself just becomes so

00:56:02.440 secondary even if you've mastered it and that's true then with all of life that you can come to

00:56:09.080 a place that really you discover that you've always been there, but you relax in that source

00:56:15.400 of being that you've always been so fully that all the things of life, woman and world, sex and money,

00:56:23.220 they become very secondary. Now, can you just decide to do that? I don't know. I haven't seen

00:56:31.760 that possible. Like I, I know I knew that before I could be that. And I, and you just said it out

00:56:38.660 loud and you talked about your friend who teaches this or talks about it. It's not like you could

00:56:43.940 just say it and people will go, okay, now I'm, I'll be happy first. I believe you have to go

00:56:49.140 through what you have to go through, you know, and that going through is your path. It's your

00:56:53.800 unique journey of what you have to go through. I do like that. You said you were talking about

00:56:58.760 doing it in integrity i mean the only thing i would add is honor as well um yeah there's there's

00:57:04.560 a lot of thoughts that i have throughout the day that i would not want people to know because i'd

00:57:08.880 look like a horrible human being uh but that's not honorable either so there is some honor and

00:57:14.420 restraint in our thoughts even though we might be in integrity it might still come at the expense

00:57:20.320 of somebody else and i'm not interested in that i i'm not even saying you're suggesting you were

00:57:24.880 saying that right no no I was actually using the word integrity in the way you're using the word

00:57:30.700 honor I believe got it okay got it I understand the difference that you're making too yes yeah

00:57:37.300 I've just seen you know it's it's it's like there's this um I don't know how you feel about

00:57:44.240 this there there seems to be a growing sentiment of selfishness in society and I see this with men

00:57:50.460 and women where it's, you know, I got to go out and get mine and you have blameless divorce or

00:57:55.920 faultless divorce. And, and, you know, even with people with kids, they're like, oh, my kids are

00:58:00.340 so annoying. I hate my kids. And I just wish I could go back to whatever else. And everything

00:58:05.140 has just become so selfish and, and, and centered around self. Like, I think there's a way for us

00:58:13.900 to focus on ourselves that is in alignment with the betterment of the people that we're we have

00:58:21.560 a responsibility for but it's really disheartening to see how selfish people have become would you

00:58:26.260 agree disagree where do you fall on that well i would agree i think that's what we've been talking

00:58:30.640 about that we go through these phases from another way to say the phases is from selfishness like i

00:58:36.580 me me me me me um to we you know like not just me but you and me and then beyond that to you know

00:58:45.380 thou to god living through us so we go from just self-centeredness to we centeredness you know

00:58:52.420 with other people and then even beyond that to being lived by something beyond me and we

00:58:59.380 you know here whether me and we are here or not that's here so yes we grow through those as a

00:59:07.620 kind of sequence i've noticed for most people um you know i just want to mention something you

00:59:13.160 brought up in a way when you're no longer stuck in your patterns then the patterns that you've

00:59:20.120 stuffed down or ignored can arise and most of us have ignored like we come we're mammals like our

00:59:28.680 bodies are animals we're beyond our bodies but we have in our bodies encoded all kinds of violence

00:59:36.320 and sexuality and sexual violence from our past from things we've inherited you know if you look

00:59:43.080 at apes or other animals that we that we have these tendencies in us and when we're no longer

00:59:50.500 afraid to look at them if we just sit there we may feel all kinds you know we may have all these

00:59:56.620 urges arising in us that we would not live out i mean if we lived them out we would just be reduced

01:00:02.520 to our most animalistic destructive nature so what happens you know you want to be able to realize i

01:00:10.440 am the awareness or the deep being in which these past patterns and they could be passed in the sense

01:00:17.060 of primate past you know mammalian past are arising so you can be sitting there or doing

01:00:23.760 something or or with a person and have all kinds of weird you know some men i know they walk down

01:00:30.600 the street and if they're honest with themselves as they're walking down a busy street it's like 1.00

01:00:34.040 they're looking at the women going i'd fuck her i wouldn't fuck her i'd fuck her i wouldn't fuck 1.00

01:00:37.200 her and then the men are like i'd kill him i couldn't kill him i better be for like they're 1.00

01:00:41.180 in this animalistic place but that doesn't mean to act on that of course that means to allow like

01:00:47.280 to be aware of these animal pasts and let them come up and dissolve in that space of love or

01:00:52.680 awareness and that's why it's so important to feel what we started talking about earlier of the

01:00:57.320 heart to heart or love to love or knowing the being in a plant or in an animal or in a person

01:01:02.060 on the street because if you're feeling someone's heart and in you the animalistic impulse arises

01:01:08.140 to do something to them nasty you wouldn't do it because you're feeling their heart you're feeling

01:01:13.920 that they are you you treat others as you would treat yourself as you are you treat them as

01:01:19.400 they were you that they are you at that level of heart so you you live from that depth of god or

01:01:26.800 you live from that depth of love even though these potentially very destructive tendencies

01:01:33.700 are within all of us and we have to be willing to let them arise without stuffing them down but

01:01:40.560 not live them out and i maybe that's what you're calling honor but yes that's part of the the way

01:01:46.760 zero. Yeah. Well, I'm also, I appreciate you bringing that up, but I'm also really interested

01:01:51.440 in your subtitle and I can't, I can't, um, remember exactly, but it, it, it alludes to,

01:01:56.880 uh, power, sex and freedom, which could, could be achieved through financial acumen. So it's

01:02:06.080 sex, power and money. Right. Um, but as I'm hearing you talk about this, I think what I'm 0.97

01:02:11.840 hearing you say, and you, you tell me, give me some nuance and tell me if I'm wrong,

01:02:15.120 is that you can achieve those things by being maybe more

01:02:20.580 successfully than by chasing or pursuing those things. Is that safe to say, or did I completely

01:02:28.400 misrepresent the subtitle? No, I think so. So the subtitle is a guide to primal power. So let's

01:02:34.940 unpack it for a moment. The primal power is the power of God. It's the power of the divine living

01:02:41.720 view it's the power of the higher power i mean people use that word higher power so that's the

01:02:47.480 power of that i'm talking about is primal power not the power you get through accumulating money

01:02:52.380 i would not call that the primal power so the primal power is the power of creation is power

01:02:58.420 so that depth of being is fills effusive with primal power and then it's a guide to primal

01:03:06.720 power boundless sex and by boundless sex i mean unbound like you're not in a body driving to

01:03:14.020 ejaculate that's very bound it's tension tension release ah that felt good and then again tension

01:03:20.340 tension release instead of that you're with your lover your hearts are open you are at one you are

01:03:27.440 love to love with your partner and all the sense of separation dissolves so the sexuality becomes

01:03:33.920 boundless unbound unlimited unconstrained so a guide to primal power boundless sex or another

01:03:41.800 way to say that would be love motivated sex and then freedom beyond ambition so what is the freedom

01:03:49.160 beyond ambition obviously that's not money money is a form of ambition that's useful in the early

01:03:54.500 stages of development of most men to earn enough money that they feel relatively free or to learn

01:04:00.160 how to earn it some men feel free being a monk you don't have to earn money to be free you can

01:04:04.340 choose a kind of monk-like lifestyle is another way to to live that but what i'm talking about

01:04:09.080 is beyond ambition that sense of being is free like right now if you feel the deepest part of

01:04:17.700 yourself the deepest eye you can feel it is free it has been there when you've been unhappy it has

01:04:24.460 been there when you've been happy it's there right now it's there now even though your thoughts have

01:04:29.260 changed it's there now even though your thoughts have changed so you that depth of being is always

01:04:35.660 already free so that's the freedom beyond ambition so primal power boundless sex and freedom beyond

01:04:45.020 ambition are all describing just aspects of that always already here deep eye expressing itself in

01:04:52.640 the world um so yeah i i hear what you're saying you could confuse those with things like what you

01:04:59.160 can gain through money or power or fame or but you can also just sink into them you can realize

01:05:05.880 them in your being and that's what the man of zero is about david i'm really glad i'm glad you brought

01:05:11.720 that up i mean this is uh yeah that's it's a it's obviously a great distinction and and i just

01:05:18.100 believe there's more depth to that and it will lead to a better more fulfilling life for men

01:05:22.240 and it'll lead to better results for the people that we care about which is important to me and

01:05:28.920 i think most men listening to this david will you let the guys know where to connect with you

01:05:33.880 obviously they can pick up a copy of the book man of zero wherever they want to pick up a copy

01:05:38.140 but let them know if there's anything else if there's any direction you want to give them and

01:05:42.440 how to find more about your work um well they can just pick up the book all of my books are

01:05:47.900 available for free chapter by chapter on my website data.info d-e-i-d-a.info so every week

01:05:55.120 we update a free chapter so you don't have to spend anything for to access any of my books or

01:06:00.800 audios are also offered for free on my website so anyone who wants to can access my talks or

01:06:07.420 my books and you know i i don't do many interviews as you probably know for decades i didn't do any

01:06:13.400 um i really like my work to speak for me that's my offering so it's out there for free if you

01:06:20.620 wanted or you can purchase the book if you want but i would suggest that those are the

01:06:24.200 best ways to access my work. I really appreciate it. I do know that you don't do many interviews.

01:06:29.400 You've been on a couple of podcasts of mutual friends, Connor Beaton with Man Talks and Chris

01:06:34.940 Williamson, the Modern Wisdom podcast. I love both of those guys and the work they're doing. And I

01:06:40.520 feel honored that you'd be willing to join us and impart some of that wisdom. So David, thank you

01:06:45.300 for joining me today. Thank you very much, Ryan. I really had a great time. Thank you. You're doing

01:06:50.080 great work. Thank you. Gentlemen, there you go. My conversation with the one and only David

01:06:56.260 Yada. I hope you enjoyed it. I enjoyed it. It was a real treat and honor to have him on the podcast.

01:07:00.900 Like I said, he does not do very many interviews. So I was honored that he and his team wanted to

01:07:06.960 interview with us. So guys, make sure to check out a copy of his latest book. It's called the

01:07:12.520 man of zero, a guide to primal power, boundless sex and freedom beyond ambition. And if you

01:07:17.980 haven't already read it, I'd also suggest Way of the Superior Man by David as well. Also make sure

01:07:23.700 to check out the Iron Council. Again, we're closing the doors the end of this week, October 31st.

01:07:28.760 So if you've been on the fence and you're wondering and you've thought about doing it,

01:07:31.840 now's the time. Let's wrap up 2026 strong and let's roll into 2027 even stronger.

01:07:38.460 Head to orderofman.com slash iron council. All right, gentlemen, that's all we've got for you

01:07:44.180 today. We will be back tomorrow for our Ask Me Anything. Until then, go out there, take action,

01:07:50.560 and become the man you were meant to be. Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.

01:07:55.680 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be?

01:07:59.320 We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.

Order of Man - October 27, 2026

DAVID DEIDA ｜ Primal Power, Boundless Sex, and Freedom Beyond Ambition

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