Small Talk Creates Big Opportunity ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES
Episode Stats
Harmful content
Misogyny
2
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Toxicity
23
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Hate speech
1
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Summary
Most of us hate small talk. We think it's a waste of time, it's weak, and it's beneath us. So what we often do as men is skip it. You know, go straight for the jugular, straight to the agenda, and go for the kill.
Transcript
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You don't need to be interesting, you need to be interested.
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If you can be interested in other people, you will be interesting.
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I have to be interesting and then people will like me.
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No, they'll like you less because you're obnoxious and pretentious and kind of full of yourself.
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But if you go into an interaction with curiosity and trying to figure out who they are
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and asking about challenges and struggles and who their favorite sports teams are
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and why they moved to Central Texas and what brought them there,
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We think it's a waste of time or breath for guys,
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maybe even who don't have anything real or significant to say.
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you know we'll go into that meeting and go straight for the jugular straight to the agenda
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straight to the ass straight for the kill or maybe we'll stand behind a woman in the grocery store
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line and we'll come up with a thousand different things that we can say to this woman and we say
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none of it because it just doesn't feel that important or at least it doesn't feel important
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enough to justify flapping our gums about it but here's the reality is that when you don't engage
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in small talk it's costing you and i used to be on the other side of the fence like i don't want
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to small talk i don't want to waste time i don't want to talk about the weather the sports or the
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traffic or whatever i don't want to do that but what i want you to know as i shared this concept
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with you over the next, I don't know, 15 or 20 minutes is that small talk is never about the
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words that you're sharing. Okay. The guy in a business meeting who spends, even if it's just
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90 seconds on how was your flight today? How was the, how was the flight in? How was the drive in
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before he gets into that pitch? Isn't wasting a bunch of time. He's finding out if this person
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is a man that he wants to work with. And that other guy is finding out if you're the kind of
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man he wants to work with. Before any money has exchanged hands, any transaction, any contract
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signed, I want to know, is this a guy I even like? Or the man in the grocery store line who says to
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the woman in front of him who might be attractive, and maybe he notices a bottle of wine and says,
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hey, it looks like you know something about wine. And I don't know anything about it. What is it
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that i'm looking at is that a good year is that a good flavor i don't i don't know anything about
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wine either but is that a good flavor is that a good year like tell me about it that guy isn't
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making chit chat what he's potentially doing is he's opening a door that most guys will walk
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right past and then they'll wonder to themselves why don't people like me why why why do i not have
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good relationships why do the opportunities to go go to other people and what I want you to
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understand among other things there's other principles at work here but what I need you
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to understand is that small talk emphasis on the word small does not mean unimportant
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small talk to me equates to low risk and again I used to sit on the other side of the table where
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I thought, this is stupid, this is silly, this is a waste of time. But now I see now, all I'm doing
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is opening the door. It's like walking up to the front door of my house and turning the knob. It
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doesn't take a lot of effort to turn the knob, but that's what allows me to go inside and have my
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sanctuary, my reprieve, my efficiency and effectiveness with the business or spending
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time with my kids. Okay, low risk, what you guys need to understand is low risk is where opportunities
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hide. And opportunities are just waiting on you being willing to just say something, anything,
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open the door. Even if you flounder, even if you flop around and you sound silly and foolish and
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stupid, just open the dang door. And that's what I want to get into today. How a man turns small
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talk into big opportunity but a lot of guys will dismiss this again we'll write it off we'll say
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it's a waste of time we'll say it's fake or it's shallow or one of the things i used to say is
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small talk it just felt and seemed like this sleazy action reserved for furniture salesmen
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or used car salesmen just trying to be slick and sell me an overpriced couch or a lemon of a car
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okay most guys especially if you're listening to this podcast would rather talk about something
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real strategy finances money empire ideas big ideas or just not talk at all i can say this as
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i often joke around that i'm an extroverted introvert my default is introversion but i can
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be extroverted because i realize the importance of it so i can tell you as an introvert who tries
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to be extroverted, that it works. But I get the instinct. I understand why you don't want to talk
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about the weather. I don't care. How many people have you talked with, regardless of where they
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live? This is crazy. Hear me out on this one. And maybe you guys agree or disagree. Is there a
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climate in the history of this planet and humankind where a person doesn't say, just wait 40 minutes
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Frankly, I don't really care about your traffic
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You know, everybody's talking about the World Cup
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I don't know who wins or doesn't. Norway, I think, was in it. We lost. Maybe England was in the final. I don't know unless I see it on social media or the news because I don't care.
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Okay, nobody's life changes because they had a rainstorm. Nobody's life changes because they had a lot of traffic coming into town to get here.
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nobody's life changes because england won or world the lost the world cup again i maybe they did they
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might have been in the in the quarterfinals or semi i don't know because i don't care okay but
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here this is good this is good that i don't care because i'm talking you about why small talk is
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important because here's the mistake men confuse the content of small talk with the function of
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small talk that's what i want to talk to you about what is functional about it the the words
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that we're saying are are about the weather or the traffic aren't about the weather or traffic
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it's just again it's just the door that we're opening to our house but what's actually happening
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underneath the surface is that two people are deciding do i even like this person is this person
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somebody i can trust is this person somebody i respect is this person somebody who i enjoy
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talking with in real time is this person somebody worth knowing even and and what i what i think of
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it as now is that small talk is it's it's almost like reconnaissance a little bit it's the
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reconnaissance phase it's what happens before any real relationship exists you don't get to skip it
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you can only get better at it or worse or just ignore it every business partnership every
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mentorship every marriage you've ever heard of started with some version of small talk nobody
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meets a stranger and opens with the terms of the deal the terms of the arrangement the deal comes
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later but the door that you're trying to open comes first and what i want you to know is that
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this is not performative sometimes think people think it's performative small talk isn't performance
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where you have to be charming or interesting or clever or cute or funny or you know fill in your
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adjective of choice it's again reconnaissance it's a fact-finding mission where your only job
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is to just gather information and pay attention to the other person because people like being
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paid attention to. Some of the best conversations I've ever had in, in hindsight, looking back are
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the ones where that person didn't, didn't really say much. I did all the talking. Why? Because
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people like to talk about themselves and too many men get this backwards. They walk into a room
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thinking, you know, what do I say? What do I do? What makes me sound impressive? What's the question
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or makes me sound really wealthy or sophisticated
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And what that does is actually counterintuitive.
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People think you're on the spectrum when you do it that way,
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Oh, what does this person think of me right now?
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the role instead of actually being the role instead of actually connecting but the man who
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does this well walks in with a different line of questioning what can i learn about this person
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in the next two to three minutes you know it's funny when when i play i love sports because it
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gives you a really good indication of how a person is very quickly i could train with a person let's
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say jujitsu for example for 30 seconds and know that this person is intense or passive or has
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self-esteem issues or is confident i could go on to the golf course and see a person swing and say
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that guy is confident or i could see it and say that guy is not confident and has less to do with
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the mechanics of his swing than it does with his demeanor and that shift that you're going to make
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that when people receive it, it's like a magnet.
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hey dad, I wanna share this thing about my day or whatever
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or you put it in your pocket and you're like what's up bud talk to me you're a magnet for them
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if if you take a woman on a date whether she's somebody you just met or your wife of 20 years
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and you're driving and maybe you got some music on in the background and your phone is in your
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pocket or upside down on the center console or out of sight and you're actually asking real
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questions and talking with her and laughing with her and joking and asking about who she is,
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bro, you're magnetic. If you sit down with a client, instead of whipping out your sales charts
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and your PowerPoint presentation and all your super amazing, incredible words and just ask
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good questions about your client, you're magnetic. You don't need to be interesting.
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you need to be interested if you can be interested in other people you will be interesting
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that's where guys get it wrong i have to be interesting and then people will like me no
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they'll like you less because you're obnoxious and pretentious and kind of full of yourself
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but if you go into an interaction with curiosity and trying to figure out who they are and asking
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about challenges and struggles and who their favorite sports teams are and why they moved to
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Central Texas and what brought them there, why they moved away from Central Texas. Those are
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two different games. And one of those games, the curiosity games, builds opportunity. So I want to
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give you four really simple moves. These are not tactics for performance. These are just tools that
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you're going to use when it comes to small talk. Okay, first move. We got four moves. First move.
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ask a follow-up question, not the opener, right?
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So anyone can ask, so, you know, tell me what you do.
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isn't what makes us interesting or interested or unique,
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So most guys will hear the answer and they'll nod
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to talk about themselves. So for example, maybe you're on a date, first date. So what do you do
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for work? That's the opener, right? What do you do for work? And she says, I work in the hospital
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as a nurse practitioner, and I'm trying to go back to school to get these other credentials.
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And your eyes glaze over and gloss over. You're like waiting, you're tapping your fingers on the
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desk. You're like, I wish you'd just finish up so I could tell her what I do. Okay, that's not
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engagement. The follow-up is where, as they say, the fortune is. So the follow-up to that question
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is, that's amazing. Nurse practitioner, wow, what got you into that line of work?
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And she says, oh, you know, when I was a kid, my mom was in the business or my dad,
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he was a healthcare professional and he talked about how important the work was. And
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he shared all these, these insights about helping people. And then it's not like, okay, cool. And
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then skip over to your question. It's like, whoa. So your dad was in healthcare. Was he a doctor?
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Was he a nurse practitioner? Like you're talking about what, what was his, what was his thing?
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Guys, the deeper you can go, it actually takes pressure off of you because you don't need to
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worry about, oh shit, what am I going to say? I don't know what to say. You don't need to say
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anything. Again, it's very simple. It's, hey, what made you get into that? Here's another one.
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What's the hardest part of that? Like, what's your biggest struggle right now? Just go one layer
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deeper than everyone else does. And that's all it takes to be memorable. That story I talked about
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a minute ago, the made up story about the woman in the line who's got a bottle of wine in front
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of you at the grocery store. And you're like, hey, it looks like you know something about wine.
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I have no idea. Tell me about that. And she's like, oh yeah, I love this wine. It's so, again,
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I don't know nothing about it. It's like so flavorful or delicious or whatever. It's like,
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oh, okay. Have you tried a ton of different wine? What makes it the best? Is it the sweetness? Is
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it the fragrance? Is it the taste? Is it the way that makes you feel? What is it about that one?
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I want to know. And she's like, oh, I just, I just love the taste. And another question might be,
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oh, well, that's cool. What's the worst that you've ever tried? And now she's like, oh yeah,
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I bought this one wine on a whim. My friend told me about it and it just tasted like absolute
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garbage. And I will never do that again. You see how easy it is when you just start to ask
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really good questions. That's what makes you memorable because nobody does it.
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you'll ask her about the wine and she's like yeah I like this year and this vintage again I don't
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know and and you're like oh yeah okay that one's okay but I like this one instead it's like dude
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why did you just move the attention away from her over to you I was talking with one of my coaching
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clients yesterday and and we were doing some role play about how he could transition conversations
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into a sale. And I can't remember the exact scenario, but I, as the potential client had
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given him an objective and he went straight into sales mode. I said, well, stop timeout. Hold on.
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You're going into sales mode. I got to get you out of sales mode. I want you to get into curiosity
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mode. So instead of telling me why what you do is better, instead, why don't you ask why what I
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have done has not worked. And he's like, oh, okay, got it. Always ask questions. Okay. Number two,
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be more memorable, not impressive. Nobody cares about your accolades. Nobody cares. And even if
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they do, you just sound pretentious and stupid. Okay. We, we, as men, we default into trying to
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sound successful in a two minute conversation, but you know, what's really ironic. If you're
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not focused on trying to sound impressive, you're actually perceived as more impressive because
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the loudest guy is often the least impressive. And if I have to sit here and beat on my chest
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like a freaking gorilla and tell you how amazing I am, nobody believes that. What they believe is
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the quiet, calm, confident, secure man. So you don't need to get in the job title, the deal you
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just closed, how much you can bench press. That'd be freaking weird if you led with that, but I'm
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sure there's been weirder things. Okay. Nobody remembers that. Or if they do, they remember it
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for all the wrong reasons. But what people actually remember is how that conversation
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made them feel. And whether you said anything specific enough to stick, you know, ask those
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sharp questions, make an observation about a person that nobody else in the room made.
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If you see a beautiful woman and you're like, Hey, you're beautiful, bro. She hears that all
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the time. She's beautiful. We know, we get it. She knows, she gets it. So why not tease her a little
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bit? Why not give her a hard time? Not mean-spirited, but flirtatious, playing around. Man, if you're
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the first guy that points out something kind of funny, you have a huge advantage over the guy
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that's like, your eyes are beautiful. She knows that. She knows her eyes are pretty. Every single
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guide tells her that. Do something different. Okay, resumes, they get forgotten. That's why
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when I see, you know, we're getting close to midterms right now, and all the political signs
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are starting to go up on the corners, and I drive by, and there's this person, that person, this
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person for county commission, this person for governor, this person for senate, and they all
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look the same. But what if there was, if I ever ran for office, I would do bright green or bright
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purple as my colors because it's memorable it's different it's unique don't be forgotten
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do something unique do something interesting even take a risk and by the way if you take a risk in
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small chat and small conversations who cares probably never even see that person again
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i i've often heard and and i feel this to be true is that the guys in jujitsu who get started but
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are willing to experiment rather than to default to their skill set are the ones who get better
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it's like i'm just here experimenting i'm just going to try something and see if it works
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all right move number three is to follow up with that person in 48 hours at least 48 hours
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probably sooner okay and this is where 90 of guys lose everything that you just spent your
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time building you'll have a great conversation whether it's on a dating app or you meet somebody
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or you have a new client or you have you went to a business function and you met some potential
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new business partners you have that great conversation you exchange information and
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then you just let it die in a phone or in your pocket in a business card that you'll never open
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again and the conversation really isn't that the the opportunity i already said that it just opens
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the door you still got to step inside and so the follow-up is really where the opportunity is
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you know it could be a quick message hey it was great to talk with you about x yesterday
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um here's that here's that thing i mentioned or hey you shared an idea with me i implemented it
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yesterday afternoon and it worked like a charm thank you or that woman if you get her number
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and she's talking about wine and you get her number at the grocery store to go to the grocery
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store and pick out a bottle of wine and take a picture and say, hey, I got this one. Is this a
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good one or a bad one? What do you think? Follow up. What are you doing? It's so disheartening
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when I see guys who actually open the door and then they don't follow up with anything. And
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they're like, how come that person never followed up? Because you were supposed to.
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You were the man, not that person. Close the loop, guys. What it does is it turns a stranger
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into a contact for you but if you skip this step and and the 20 minutes or 30 minutes or hour that
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you just spent about the team about the wine about the traffic about the weather yeah that was a waste
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of time totally a waste of time use it as leverage not to manipulate somebody else but leverage to
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get your foot in the door and then get your calf in the door and your thigh in the door and then
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walk through the door. And the last step that I'm going to share with you guys today is that when
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it comes to small talk, I want you to treat every single room that you're in like it matters
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because you don't actually know which one does. You will never know. That woman at the grocery
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store might be the love of your life or potentially a powerful business ally that you never would have
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imagined if you didn't talk with her the client may or may not become a client the prospect may
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or may not become a client but they might introduce you to two dozen other people who
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will become some of the biggest clients you've ever known the business partner who or your boss
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who you feel a disconnection from if you can engage in enough small talk to actually get to
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know the person might become a powerful ally when it comes time for promotion or a business partner
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when it comes time to start a business. Everything matters. I can't tell you, I've had this happen on
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multiple occasions where maybe I'm on a plane or, well, here's an example. I had a guy call me.
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He's been in the Iron Council for a long time. His name is Alan. He's one of our best members
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and a tremendous ally in our Brotherhood, the Iron Council.
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And he calls me up or he texted me and he said,
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hey, Ryan, I'm at this event and it's a business event.
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And I sat down and I had my order of man hat on or shirt on.
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And the guy next to me at the event said he listens to that podcast.
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And so Alan gave me his name and I sent Alan a video message to this gentleman.
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and I sent him a message. It was like a minute long, two minutes long, whatever it was. And I
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just said, Hey man, I'm, I heard you're with Alan. Alan's a solid as they come. He's been a good
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friend and a good ally for me. And I can't speak highly enough about the guy. And I just want to
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tell you, I appreciate you listening to the podcast. That's pretty cool. You guys bumped
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into each other. Um, I hope the, I hope the networking thing or the business function goes
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well and a really cool to connect. That's it. It literally took me 90 seconds. And Alan reached
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out to me a couple of days ago and he's like, Hey man, I gave that video to that guy. I'm like,
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Oh cool. And he said, yeah, he told me now he has to join. I didn't do it. So he would join
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the iron council. I did it because I actually care about people. I did it because I appreciate
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when people listen to what we do and they're supportive of what we do, but the opportunity
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came no less guys huge opportunities will present themselves when you just go out of your way to
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talk with people and maybe they won't in some cases so what a good conversation is well worth
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it you know it's that it's that guy next to you at the kids baseball game or or the man i i ran
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into a guy at the grocery store today he um i was in line and i forgot i wanted to get a bottle of
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water. So I, I told the clerk, nobody was behind me at the time. And I told the clerk, Hey, I'm
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just going to go run and grab a bottle of water. And she's like, cool. Yeah, go grab it. So I ran
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over there, grabbed a bottle of water, brought it back up to the line. And in the meantime, a guy
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had come behind me and he was waiting. And I'm like, Hey man, I'm so sorry. Like, thanks for
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being patient. I just had to grab this bottle of water. And I just smiled at him. I was friendly
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and, and, you know, cordial and courteous. And he's like, Hey, no problem at all. He's like,
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I love that smile. He's like, keep wearing that smile, man. And he's like, what's your name? I'm
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like i'm ryan and he said his name i can't remember it right off hand and we shook hands and i said
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oh that's cool i appreciate just being patient i'm sure i'll see you if you come to this grocery
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store often i'm sure i'll see you again i don't know who he is i don't know what's going to come
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of it i don't know if anything will come i don't know if i'll ever see him again but what did it
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cost me to have a 30 second conversation with a guy and he said hey keep smiling and i said you
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too man like have a good day work hard today hope it's productive for you it cost me nothing
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but it could potentially unlock everything maybe it's that stranger at the at the wedding reception
00:26:10.640
okay again most of these will go nowhere and that's fine it's fine but you don't get to
00:26:18.300
pre-select which 20 minutes is going to change your life all you get to do is decide whether
00:26:24.400
you show up for all of those moments or or none of them i will admit i'm not great at this on the
00:26:32.360
complain. I am not a talker with the person next to me, but I can't tell you how often I've heard
00:26:37.400
people say when they sit next to so-and-so, they're sitting next to a fortune 500 business
00:26:43.600
owner who can unlock a new market to the person who's sitting next to them. That's part of the
00:26:48.700
reason why as often as I can, I try to fly first class because I want to sit next to first class
00:26:54.620
people and then i that's that's opening the door now i gotta step through it right men who build
00:27:03.000
real networks in their lives aren't smarter than anyone else they don't they're not lucky they're
00:27:09.140
not like picking winners they just do it everywhere that's all they just take more shots
00:27:13.400
and so i want you to understand what it costs you if you skip this idea of small talk
00:27:18.620
understand what's at stake here guys careers every career i've had whether it's order of
00:27:24.420
my financial planning career my retail career before that and all the other ends and odds that
00:27:29.220
i did from landscaping and pizza delivery and electrical and heating and air and i'm sure
00:27:35.020
there's a lot more in between military they're built on relationships more than they're built
00:27:39.620
on your resume business gets done between people who trust each other and like each other
00:27:45.140
and trust gets built in those really low risk moments that i was talking about if a guy says
00:27:53.360
oh yeah i'm a huge patriots fan and i know nobody on the patriots i might miss an opportunity
00:27:58.180
that could potentially be the biggest sale of my life because i know nothing about the patriots
00:28:04.000
shame on me it's those low risk moments long before money is handed over exchanged long before
00:28:13.060
anybody's signing contracts the man who avoids that small talk isn't protecting himself for his
00:28:19.260
time he's he's limiting he's cutting off channels that i think are where the the real opportunity
00:28:28.600
lies nobody posts a job listing for for the guy you know i i met in line who asked good questions
00:28:37.340
like they don't they don't post for that but that's actually how it happens like think about
00:28:43.740
your current job or think about other jobs that you've had is it because you had a really good
00:28:48.500
resume that looked the same as everybody else's? Or is it because your brother's cousin Joe
00:28:55.580
knows you, spends time with you, and he happens to be in the recruiting department at the Fortune
00:29:00.360
500 company? And because you know Joe and you guys eat chips and salsa together on the weekends
00:29:06.180
watching UFC or football, and that's why you got the job. Not because of your freaking resume.
0.99
00:29:11.560
okay this happens way more than any of us typically are willing to admit an introversion
0.98
00:29:18.600
is not an excuse here either this isn't about becoming the loudest guy in the room or the most
00:29:23.500
obnoxious or that cheesy sales leasy furniture guy or or the used car salesman it's just about
00:29:32.020
being willing to open your mouth in the small moments instead of waiting for the big ones
00:29:36.200
and i could swing for the fences when the big opportunities arise but if i don't have the
00:29:40.480
mechanics of swinging i'm gonna swing hard but i'm gonna miss even harder okay the bit the big
00:29:48.000
dogs the guys who you really want in your life the woman who could actually be a lifelong partner
00:29:54.040
the the person who could be a business partner the athlete who could be your best athlete if
00:29:59.600
you're a coach those guys don't announce themselves and if they do you wouldn't believe
00:30:06.880
it. Like if I said to you, like I could be the best thing that ever happened to you, you wouldn't
00:30:10.720
believe it. You think I'm an asshole and I don't, but I could be. So here's the challenge. Here's
1.00
00:30:16.860
the assignment. Okay. I want you to actually take this seriously this weekend today, start as many
00:30:24.140
conversations as you can. And I'm not saying that in rhetorically, I'm telling you, start as many
00:30:30.100
conversations as you can and get out a notepad or get out your phone and say, Hey, this morning,
00:30:34.680
I started three conversations with strangers. Let me see if I can start five this afternoon.
00:30:39.340
And this afternoon, you start five conversations with strangers. And then tomorrow, you're like,
00:30:42.780
cool. I did eight yesterday. I think I can do 15. And then Saturday, you write down and you just
00:30:48.380
create a little tally. I started 15 conversations with strangers today. And then Sunday, you're
00:30:53.100
like, can I do 20? I think you can. Okay, not not one a day. I'm not talking about doing one.
00:30:59.120
Everybody can start up one conversation, because you're going to be stuck in the elevator with
00:31:03.100
somebody at some point, right? Like, hey, and you stare at each other weird, you can say something
00:31:07.720
that's that's fine. But that's not, that's not maximizing it. I want you to do as many stack
00:31:12.640
them all as many as you can. It's the guy next to you at the coffee shop, maybe he's wearing a
00:31:18.300
weird shirt. And you're like, dude, what's that shirt about? Or it's the woman at the grocery
00:31:22.600
store line, or maybe she's in the produce aisle. And you're standing there trying to pick out the
00:31:28.460
best tomatoes. And you don't know, I don't know what the I don't know how to pick a tomato. And
00:31:32.680
you're like, Hey, maybe you know more about picking tomatoes than I do. How do you pick a
00:31:36.540
good tomato? And she might look at you and scoff or shake her head and walk away. So what? So what?
1.00
00:31:42.920
The more you do, the better off you are. Cause she might say, Oh, let me show you. And then you have
00:31:47.240
that casual touch. And then you're like, Hey, let's exchange numbers. And she becomes a woman
00:31:51.600
that you date or the client who you think is a low level client who doesn't have much to offer
0.98
00:31:58.160
your firm instead of treating them like dog crap maybe you start treating them like the person the
0.96
00:32:03.740
human being that they are and you treat them the same way you would your best client and they come
0.98
00:32:08.780
to you maybe it's in a year maybe it's in two years i had this happen in my financial planning
00:32:13.520
career i had people that i worked with who weren't totally financially successful and you know maybe
00:32:19.860
they invested five thousand or ten thousand with me i didn't treat them any different than the
00:32:24.420
people who invested $500,000 with me. But I'll tell you what, on multiple occasions, those people
00:32:28.800
who I helped that had $5,000 or $10,000 that I was managing their money, many times, a handful
00:32:37.160
that I can think of right offhand where they'd come to me and say, hey, I just, you know, my folks
00:32:41.300
just passed away, unfortunately. And I have their assets now and they're worth $750,000. Can you
00:32:48.800
help me? Yeah, I think so. Because I treated them with the reverence and respect they deserved as
00:32:55.920
a human being. But you don't want to do it for those reasons. You just want to be a good human
00:33:02.120
being. It's business acquaintances. It's the woman that you find interesting that you keep talking
00:33:09.020
yourself out of. It's that stranger in line at the hardware store, the grocery store, like the guy I
00:33:13.820
talked with today. It's the neighbor. Maybe it's your neighbor who you wave. You know, you wave when
00:33:18.160
you drive by, but you never met them. Don't sort them out. Don't qualify them. Don't get to know
00:33:26.800
and keep score on which ones matter and which ones don't. Just start a conversation. Ask real
00:33:31.320
questions. Be curious. See where it goes. Most of it, again, will go nowhere. It's fine. You'll just
00:33:37.160
know somebody who you might kind of like. I know neighbors on both sides of me. We don't spend a
00:33:42.260
lot of time together, but I like them. You know, I can sit down and have conversations with them.
00:33:47.240
I can, my neighbor, a couple of months ago, I was looking for an Airbnb. Somebody was coming
00:33:52.780
into town and I needed an Airbnb close. And I said, Hey, I think you have an Airbnb. Would you
00:33:57.200
mind? Like, do you have any openings? And she's like, yeah, actually we do have an opening.
00:34:01.120
I said, I didn't see it listed. She's like, ah, we don't list it. We're so busy. And I said, Oh,
00:34:06.280
is it available? She said, yeah. And I said, well, how much is it? And she's like, I'll tell
00:34:09.180
you what, we'll give it to you for free. Um, just cover the cleaning costs. It's like a hundred
0.96
00:34:12.800
bucks for the cleaning cost. I'm like, deal. Guys, that would not have happened if I didn't
00:34:18.460
know my neighbors. The risk is in staying quiet, not opening your mouth. I feel like I'm beating
00:34:24.440
a dead horse now. But I hope you understand the importance of this. Okay, now when you run across
00:34:30.800
somebody who you might be able to help or they might be able to help with you, follow up. 48-hour
00:34:35.920
rule. No more. Maybe less, but no more. No exceptions. So guys, that's the assignment.
00:34:42.800
Be uncomfortable. Do it often. And I think it'll do more for your relationships, your career,
00:34:48.800
your romantic life over the next year than almost anything else. And you can start this weekend.
00:34:56.160
You can start today. I'll leave you with this. Small talk is not small. It's big, or at least
00:35:03.260
it has the potential to be. It's the first move. It's the first step in every relationship that
00:35:08.180
you're going to build. So stop treating it like noise, like a nuisance, like something you don't
00:35:12.640
want to do and start treating it like the door that it actually is if you want a great place to
00:35:18.820
practice this and meet other people who you can start having conversations with and asking
00:35:23.540
questions of join us inside of our exclusive brotherhood the iron council head over to the
00:35:29.360
iron council head to order of man.com iron council and get signed up get registered there but go out
00:35:37.680
there, guys. Get to work. We'll be back next week. Really cool in-person conversation with a good
00:35:44.140
friend of mine, Keith Yaki. So make sure you subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts and
00:35:48.780
on YouTube at youtube.com slash order of man. We're coming close to that 400,000 mark. I think
00:35:55.080
we can get there. We got to hit a couple of viral vids and a couple of follows from you guys and
00:35:59.820
some other shares and we'll be there. So check it out, youtube.com slash order of man. And then
00:36:04.280
most important, get out there and handle your business. Go talk to people, be open, be vocal,
00:36:09.160
make yourself known, learn about other people. Guys, until next week, go out there, take action
00:36:13.420
and become the man you are meant to be. Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.
00:36:20.300
You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.
00:36:23.980
We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.