00:00:27.580They don't understand the child support system.1.00
00:00:29.280And so they assume that even if the woman's a working career woman, that there could be some equality in the split.
00:00:36.980But generally, if custody is at stake in a long-term marriage, the man may feel like he's being investigated and be made a criminal because he earned more money and he got less custody.
00:00:49.560Most men don't know that that's going on until the divorce.
00:02:26.740It's more of an argument about what the legal system is set up to do.
00:02:30.440And we all know the government gets involved in anything, whether it's child support, whether it's marriage.
00:02:34.560It becomes a contract between three individuals.
00:02:37.080It's you, your spouse, then the government.
00:02:40.440You're making a phenomenal argument against the system that takes advantage of people who do not know the law.
00:02:47.000And that's in every single line of work.
00:02:49.160Give me the argument about the institution of marriage.
00:02:52.180Because everything you said has everything to do with legal and financial ramifications, not necessarily the marriage itself being a bad institution.
00:03:00.820Correct. And I've never said marriage was a bad institution.
00:03:04.220I actually am pro-marriage. I believe marriage does have great benefits to our society.
00:03:08.920I believe children raised in two-parent households absolutely outperformed those who were raised in single-parent households.
00:03:15.160i think a single dad kid would outperform the two in all honesty because mothers like they just0.76
00:03:22.520destroy the kids financially emotionally give terrible advice like i can think of 10 pieces
00:03:28.480of advice my mother gave me that were just awful awful off the top of my head a few good ones in0.64
00:03:33.840there right i'm not saying it was all bad but like yeah the dads have all the logic the women0.75
00:03:37.920have none of it and the dads are too scared to tell the woman to shut up so it all supports
00:07:06.980They have overwhelmingly sounded the alarm on any issues, domestic violence.
00:07:12.500Now you're hearing things related to the postpartum depression.0.99
00:07:17.580when women silence the alarm, they put every woman in the position to say,1.00
00:07:22.600you can be in this position. When men sound the alarm, then we start to fracture. We start to0.89
00:07:28.880say, well, that wouldn't happen to me. And obviously I know how to hit it right. And I
00:07:31.840know how to treat a woman and I know how to love a woman. And then essentially what happens is
00:07:35.780they find out that it's not about him. His ego was not his amigo. He led himself astray. And
00:07:42.140now he's sitting in a situation which a lot of men come to me and they want me to figure out
00:07:47.360how to get him out of the situation. And I said, well, I'm not Batman. Okay, listen,
00:07:52.000I'm not trying to get you out of jail. I'm not trying to get you to escape the system.
00:07:56.340What I was trying to do was warn you of the system. So I know you have free will to do
00:08:00.920whatever you want. You can marry whoever you want. So I would like men to be prepared.
00:08:05.180Coach, let me ask you this. Tell me three things that you think are absolutely wonderful about
00:08:10.500marriage aside from love well the benefits of family raising i'm a big patriarch i love yeah
00:08:18.100so again they always make it seem like red pill guys are pragmatic they hate marriage most of them
00:08:23.780wanted to be married and then women women you know what i mean you can't control the universe
00:08:28.820family yeah i think the ultimate reward of marriage is when you become grandparents and
00:08:34.420you've been fruitful and multiplied and you can see your kids and your grandkids producing good
00:08:39.460citizens are we doing that today probably overwhelmingly not we're producing horrible
00:08:46.100citizens we're producing criminals we're producing split households so therefore i would say that
00:08:51.760would be a benefit but it's not a guarantee sure i believe monogamy would be good because that would
00:08:57.480prevent the spread of sexual diseases right but you can't guarantee i mean i've interviewed a lot
00:09:03.360of people with stds and i would say half of the people with uncurable stuff got it in marriage
00:09:08.960so no guarantee so if you can keep one partner with one partner that will present that will
00:09:14.960possibly present that and prevent that however we've seen people cheating on each other we're
00:09:19.860seeing people uh staying single until they're 30 and 40 and fornicating with as many people as they
00:09:24.700can do and then trying to get in marriages after that but the benefit would be we would probably
00:09:30.900prevent both of those issues that i brought up and then i think a third one is you're talking
00:09:35.380about building wealth it is statistically proven that people that stay in marriages long term and
00:09:41.200do not divorce those families thrive over generations and you can see people in poverty
00:09:46.760now and you can trace it back to broken homes four and five generations if you see the people
00:09:51.900who are thriving now economically you can trace it back and possibly say they had a high proportion
00:09:57.640of two parent households that were married so those are three three great benefits yeah awesome
00:10:02.740So then my follow up to that is do you think the free agent lifestyle does more to contribute to the things that you say are problematic or does it somehow in some way allow for the types of things that you say that you advocate for family togetherness, you know, look at the way society.
00:10:20.840Yeah. So now this is shaming, right? He's saying, oh, you're you're just sad and you're not advocating for togetherness. Well, getting married doesn't guarantee you're going to be together at all.
00:10:32.180It doesn't predict it in the slightest.
00:10:34.620There's a lot of people, and this isn't necessarily your fault.
00:10:37.620All you can do is just put out information.
00:10:39.600But you and I both know the majority of people in this country are not exactly road scholars or successful business people or things of that nature.
00:10:46.780So do you think that in the wrong hands, more often than not, the free agent lifestyle contributes to the very things that you say are problematic?
00:11:19.900What I did was say, I think men would be better positioning themselves to be more of a head of a household by earning, knowing what you're risking, then looking at relationships from that point.
00:11:31.780What I'm finding is that men look at relationships as some sort of salvation for them.
00:11:36.800It's a financial arrangement where the woman can bring in some income and they can share in the split, but he's losing a lot of leverage in terms of he doesn't have any authority in his household.
00:11:47.340All right. When the children are produced, the woman could just take the kids and leave and he has no way to fight it economically to go into the laws, hire any lawyers to prevent this.
00:11:57.800I'm just trying to reframe the argument. And I believe I'm more doing it in an old school way.0.90
00:12:02.080People say they're old school until they want to be old school. And I'm saying be a patriarch, be a leader, get yourself in a financial position to better yourself off in a marriage.
00:12:11.360if you want to do it. Men typically don't. They believe that this is some sort of situation where
00:12:16.480they're going to build with the woman and then overwhelmingly they get kneecapped.
00:12:21.140So when it comes to growth or the thing that you said that was interesting is you don't really0.95
00:12:26.620factor in when you're 20, 25 years old, you get married, where you're going to be. Correct. Right.
00:12:35.360And that's true. I didn't factor in having multiple businesses. I didn't factor in,
00:12:40.000know getting a doctorate and factor in any of those things you know i was just a dude on the
00:12:43.440radio you know that's who my wife married and i'm not that guy i ain't been that guy in 15 years
00:12:48.720it's almost as if when i hear you say these things it sounds like completely absolving yourself from
00:12:55.600it like just running the risk the more the more high value you are the more at risk you are
00:13:01.040but you're a businessman like i'm a businessman you're doing well i mean you've got a vietnamese
00:13:05.440tailor i didn't know that was a thing for you bro but i'm impressed so are you saying that in
00:13:11.360business like by that same logic we don't tell people you know don't go into business because
00:13:15.600the business is different because there's a few things like when you fail a business
00:13:20.880like because i have failed where i was cooked you learn so much in the failure it's so freaking
00:13:25.600painful that you come back stronger right and you come back better and you don't make the same
00:13:29.520mistakes and also the failure it's like a few years of financial hardships child support is 18
00:13:37.200to 20 and in some states they're trying to extend that the majority of businesses fail you know the
00:13:42.240majority of uh partners will stab you in the back you've had businesses fail i've had businesses
00:13:47.040fail and it absolutely sucks so why is it okay to still go in business but not necessarily for
00:14:26.720Like, did you wake up one day when you were married and say, you know what?
00:14:30.300One day this ain't going to work out and I'm going to write a book called The Free Agent Lifestyle and I'm going to be on a yacht with baddies.
00:14:36.460Like, I don't really think that was in your purview.
00:14:39.880And then where do you leave room for evolution as you grow that marriage can't be a part of that because otherwise we're going to have no society?
00:14:47.900Well, I believe you made some assumptions that are wrong.
00:14:50.320I did at some point in my marriage think, I'm going to be on a yacht with some baddies.